#like i was excited to read a ‘how to’ style book by a queer woman that i assumed would be meant for everyone who likes sleeping with women

[cartograffiti]

May '24 reading diary

This month, I finished 16 books, mostly quick cookbooks and graphic novels!

I started May by listening to a very unseasonal full-cast audiobook of E.T.A. Hoffmann's original The Nutcracker and the Mouse King. When I was a child, I read a lot of different text adaptations of the Tchaikovsky ballet adapted from this story, but only realized I'd never read the original when a friend got me to read Hoffmann's squarely horror story "The Sandman" a few years ago. This was creepier than the ballet story, though clearly written for children, and I'm very glad to have gotten around to it.

K.J. Charles, author of a large number of romances I'm a fan of, put out her first mystery A-plot novel, Death in the Spires. I think it's a good introduction to her style if you're not a big romance person, and I think it was the right call for this plot to prioritize the genre elements in this way, but I also have found her B-plot mysteries more exciting. No problem, I liked it a lot, and it has a lot of juicy thoughts about justice as distinct from the law and how trust is earned or lost. Gay disabled detective.

Two sports romances: You Should Be So Lucky, a sensational 1960s baseball player/magazine journalist relationship, meditating beautifully on the fear of failure and on grief. One of the mains was in a long-term relationship with someone who has died, and I think this is the best widowed romance character I've ever read. Sebastian is also just fabulous at taking a tour of a made-up person, full of small details and slice-of-life stakes. I've read all her books and will continue to; I like her particular approach to historicals and her ability to make queer happy endings distinct and individual. M/M.

The other sports romance I read this month is The Boxing Baroness by Minerva Spencer, which I only mildly enjoyed. Unfortunately I don't even have any real criticisms, I just very simply didn't click with Spencer's style on a sentences level, particularly in sex scenes. Your mileage will vary! There is a lot of really enjoyable bits about the hot honorable love interest thirsting over how strong and cool he thinks the heroine is, and he's right. This is definitely worth trying if the basic premise of woman boxer Regency is your thing. Wait, I do have one plot criticism--this would have been stronger without the epilogue. We didn't actually need to meet [historical figure redacted]. M/F.

Graphic novels--I used to read Chelsey Furedi's Rock and Riot when it was coming out as a webcomic, and I was excited when her follow-up, Project Nought, was suspended soon after launch because of a book deal. Unfortunately I somehow missed it when the book actually came out in 2017, and only when Heartstopper sent me on a nostalgia trip last month did I realize I could read it. I wish I had read Project Nought when it was new! A lot of the sci-fi plot no longer feels futuristic even 7 years on, although the core twist is just fabulous. There isn't enough of the interpersonal depth that shines in Rock and Riot, the villain plot resolution is a bit too easy for the YA market, and overall I just wouldn't pitch this as more than pleasant.

The rest of the graphic novels, far more than pleasant, I read volumes 8, 9, 10, and 11 of Witch Hat Atelier by Shirahama Kamome. This was a good batch to read close together, as they all deal with the events of the same festival. Unfortunately I have to wait for my library to buy the next to see the resolution, but that's how manga goes! I loved a lot of what's happening at this point, with some fabulous milestones in the Coco-Agott friendship, lots of good moments from my favorite of the adults (Olruggio), and continuing to push down on the question of forbidden magic. Shirahama brings in both strong cases of things that deserve to be banned (glasses that let you see through people's clothes, not treated as remotely funny) and things that...maybe don't. I really cannot tell what ethics resolution might be end-game, which is very exciting.

Cookbooks! My lovely mother surprised me with a copy of an 80s book I'd been looking for, Vineyard Seasons by Susan Branch. I wouldn't exactly call her style pastoral, but I've seen her rediscovered a bit by cottagecore, Ghibli-esque, and related aesthetic bloggers. If that kind of romantic daily life artwork appeals to you, you might like her books as much as I do; every page is full of Branch's watercolor paintings, sometimes ornamental borders and sometimes illustrations of the sights of her home in Martha's Vineyard. I read and re-read her books just to linger over the pictures, but almost every recipe I've tried has been a winner.

I also borrowed a whole bunch of cookbooks of literary-inspired recipes. I went through two by Alison Walsh (A Literary Tea Party and A Literary Holiday Cookbook), which were disappointing; they draw from a pretty small range of books, and rely a lot on food coloring to fit the themes. Meanwhile, The Mystery Writers of America Cookbook (ed. Kate White) has a really wide range of difficulty level and approach, only some of them inspired by fiction. Each recipe was contributed by a different author, making it fun in the same way that church and community cookbooks can be, but I don't have any wish to own this, either. I have two others still to look at. (And I already own some I do recommend, Kate Young's Little Library cookbooks and Tim Federle's literary cocktail books.)

More nonfiction: DK Publishing's really insubstantial small coffee table book Banned Books, which didn't have quite enough text (I shouldn't have finished any entries unsure on what grounds they were banned/challenged, and did), but some pretty vintage covers (and not enough of those either).

Really great, with loads of pictures and thorough text: The Big Reveal: An Illustrated Manifesto of Drag by Sasha Velour. I was first aware of gender-fluid queen Sasha Velour as an illustrator and zinester, and in many ways they're the reason I was first interested in drag performers. This book doubles as a history of drag and a personal memoir of Velour's experience with it, and I enjoyed both equally. The history is well-researched and thoughtful, and the memoir is generous and self-aware. And it has some of their comics!

And I'm still reading Dorothy Dunnett's Lymond Chronicles at about one per month. I finished Pawn in Frankincense in May--lush and devastating and funny and infuriating and completely absorbing. Still not a series I would recommend to everyone, and still one I'm so glad I'm reading at this exact moment, when my emotions can go through the juicer and not feel scarred afterwards.

[abigailzimmer]

Favorite Reads of 2022

With how many books I loved this year (lots of poetry, speculative fiction, and writers reading other writers!), it’s interesting to see what really lingers with me. Some books, like Rebecca Lindenburg‘s are quiet but I always think of her list-poem of clouds when I look up at the sky. Fathoms wasn’t exactly a page turner and the long passages of statistics in Invisible Women made my eyes glaze over at times, yet I go on thinking about and sharing what I’ve learned from them. Olivia Cronk and m. forajter are friends and encountering their voices again on the page was the most special kind of reading experience. The first six books on this list were particularly unexpected and inventive in how they played with form. Here’s a little more of why I loved each of them:

1. I simply adored Dear Sal, a poem/play/poem/epistolary by Jeremy Radin (published by Not a Cult) about love, longing, and home. With its backdrop of war and the Jewish diaspora, theatrical feel, and love story, plus a fabulist cast of characters, Dear Sal reminds me of Ilya Kaminsky’s Deaf Republic in all the best ways. Abacus, “the letter-composing klutz,” writes to Sal, “the stubborn beloved,” a year after their brief affair, and the others chime in—in sympathy, distraction, or encouragement that he once again find “stars and the beginning of your darlingsong” (my favorite line, right up there with “the animal of my solitude.”) The letters to Sal are my favorite parts but also delightful are the distinct voices of each of the personae poems, as in this one from his pants:

“But o you bleary

and bumbling thing!

O you brimming

and bumbling marvel!

What is all this [he indicates my bumbling]

but proof

that all this [he indicates the mysteries]

is working?”

2. In the Dream House by Carmen Maria Machado is a tough and exquisitely told story. A memoir of a psychologically and emotionally abusive queer relationship, told at a slant, through the tropes and genres of other stories—spy thrillers, creature features, stories of wrong lessons, omens, natural disasters, and deja vu. Through her story, she also explores the general disbelief of abuse in queer relationships, the desire to “put our best foot forward” in the community, and the subsequent need for marginalized communities to be accepted in all their humanity—acknowledging the good and the bad. Again, it’s a tough read, but also incredibly moving and I loved the path she found to write about the unspeakable.

3. Interrogating the Eye by m. forajter (Schism Press) is a journey in understanding what images represent—a witness, an annunciation, a leakage, a thinking of the future, the self (“boring!”). Under the influence of Kurt Cobain, roses gifted by Bhanu Kapil, and medieval art, forajter writes with and on depression in a world that is polluted, sick, and full of passion. How do you return to making art when your relationship to yourself has changed, and where is “a steady hand … to no longer think in pieces”? Forajter looks and looks, and her looking grows into a kind of ownership and replenishing desire. It’s a heartfelt and exciting read.

“tuned towards the void/tuned towards myself // and yet, the sneakiness of vision. the sun that touches. the multiplicity of light. this is a vision made velvet.”

4. Where the Wild Ladies Are by Aoko Matsuda, translated by Polly Barton is a special kind of ghost story collection. Inspired by Japanese folktales, Matsuda’s stories feature a woman’s lover who, fished out of a river, appears every night in need of a bath; a son grieves his mother too much and to her annoyance; two saleswomen are eerily successful in getting people to buy their lanterns; and a ghost who died counting plates counts them again in her new form. These stories feature clever and thoughtful women with expanding ambitions and selves, exercising their very special talents alongside the living. This was so unexpected in style and voice and utterly delightful!

5. In two long poems, Olivia Cronk takes us into a wild, performative space in Womonster (Tarpaulin Sky). Scenes are blocked for the stage, our characters lounge on beds paging through magazines, and the narrative is frequently interrupted by a interrogator asking the speaker if they know what they’re doing. Through a deep attention to childhood and adult desires, fashion (“I understand the game is played in costume”), and the emotions we “parade in language,” she examines the many selves we carry from one era of our lives to another and one space to another:

“everything leaks / from home / and like it’s coming right into my purse like I packed it in the morning with my lunch”

The theater of home life is re-created on the page as both a control space to practice living in the speaker’s preferred conditions (“I cannot bear / domestic re-order”) and a purely play space rejecting convention and seeing everything anew (“the impossibility of the stairs meeting us is like a play”). It’s a thrilling, soap opera of a read, one to keep you on your toes and full of possibilities that only Olivia can create.

6. In The Trees Witness Everything, Victoria Chang (Copper Canyon Press) herself two very interesting constraints: a response to a poem title by W.S. Merwin and the form of a Japanese syllabic poem. The short poems (on memory and time, how we move through the day, how we look up and the birds we see when we do, and sadness, meditations which always seem to move together) are simple and powerful, giving so much space to sit with in the hard moments and delight in the small moments. I like that Chang writes mostly from a realist perspective, slipping occasionally into the surreal. And among the moon. Poets and their moons and the birds—I’ll never tire.

“There is a bird and a stone

in your body.

Your job is not

to kill the bird with the stone.”

7. The Undocumented Americans by Karla Cornejo Villavicencio is a moving picture of both the large and everyday challenges that undocumented people face. Through interviews and her personal experience, Karla raises the issues of what being undocumented means for access to health care—the networks of healers and solutions that spring up in its absence and the challenge in caring for aging parents, which particularly struck home. She writes how because of the need for work, undocumented people are often the first responders in crises and natural disasters, as in the case of 9/11 clean up efforts, but do so with a high risk of exploitation (to their health and to getting paid) and few means of advocacy. And she shares stories of people living in sanctuary, its indefinite state and challenges and its affects on families. In her introduction, she writes that she approached the interviews not with a journalistic focus but in the spirit of translation, particularly of poetry, to convey her subjects with the warmth, humor, wit, weirdness, and annoying traits they had, to make them more than workers or legal terms, to make them human. A necessary read and so much to think about what and how we can change our systems. One heartbreaking passage that has stuck with me is of the long-term effects of generations of kids being separated from their families:

“Researchers have shown that the flooding of stress hormones resulting from a traumatic separation from your parents at a young age kills off many dendrites and neurons in the brain that results in permanent psychological and physical changes. One psychiatrist I went to told me my brain looked like a tree without branches. So I just think about all of the children who have been separated from their parents, and there’s a lot of us, past and present, and some under more traumatic circumstances than others—like those who are in internment camps right now—and I just imagine us as an army of mutants. We’ve all been touched by this monster, and our brains are forever changed, and we all have trees without branches in there, and what will happen to us? Who will we become? Who will take care of us?”

8. Invisible Bias: Data Bias in a World Designed for Men is a book that is somehow both obvious and illuminating and also vindicating and incredibly frustrating for women to read. Caroline Criado Perez explores the places where we lack gender-specific data for everything from the unexpected planning of snow plow routes to creating clean-energy stoves to filing joint taxes. Some of this women just know intuitively: office spaces are too cold, seat belts are uncomfortable, iPhones rarely fit in pockets or hands, and gosh we do lots of unpaid labor. But it’s fascinating and affirming to see how these standards come about and how they might easily change once we gather the appropriate data and include people in the communities that a product/medicine/service serves to be part of the planning and feedback processes.

9. This year I read two collections by Rebecca Lindenburg, whose work is quiet and yet has loomed large in my mind. The Logan Notebooks (Center for Literary Publishing) in particular is a listy kind of book, in the spirit of Sei Shōnagon’s Pillow Book, a consideration of what makes a poetic subject. Lindenberg’s poems are gatherings on the topics of trees, mountains, insects, winds. On things that matter and things that have lost their power. Set in many kinds of wests, but mostly Utah, Lindenberg chronicles dailyness, the beautiful and impossible things that happen and also the things that are simply there. It’s an easy, meditative book to fall into, and one that grows in loveliness the longer you sit with it.

10. And finally, Rebecca Giggs' Fathoms: The World in a Whale was a dense and slow read and at times a little boring and yet these reasons are part of why it’s stuck with me for so long. The book focuses broadly on humans’ history with and impact on whales, partly in how our trash affects them (one whale was found with a whole greenhouse in its stomach), but also our noise, our tourism, our exploration and excavation of the world, our attitudes toward experiencing nature. She writes that because of her research, “my entire definition of pollution demanded revision." Griggs advocates for a philosophy of conservation that goes beyond "saving the whales" to retaining the "possible contexts in which they can continue their unique behaviors." She writes:"How to care for unmet things would seem to be a key question of this political moment."

My favorite fact: Cow farts release carbon dioxide, but whale poop helps absorb it. Because of ocean pressure, they rise to shallower levels to poop—and the current of their poop stirs up organic matter, bringing it closer to the surface so that it photosynthesizes, accelerating plankton growth and absorbing CO 2. The last 200 years of whaling has significantly depleted whale populations, altering the air and earth's atmosphere. So restoring populations would mitigate climate change—as significantly as trees. (!!!)

[oopshisaygoodnight]

the souring of Wilde

i shall tell my story chronologically, because it is better served by understanding some of what harry has been through for the past 12 years.

to start with Booksmart was perhaps my favorite movie of 2019. 

a second movie from olivia was exciting, florence pugh & shia labeauf were exciting casting choices in 2020. shia left to be replaced by harry styles- exciting casting news. january 2021, harry and olivia dating? very cool! harry has good taste in directors i like, and an older woman, all very cool. 2021- we get pap photos of them walking in LA, kissing on a yacht in italy- very fun little gossip bits, a little scandy. 

fall 2021- i get to see harry in denver on september 7th. i have the most wonderful time. i contemplate giving up everything so i could follow him around the country, but i take my merch and don’t dive in deeper. i am jealous when i see olivia attend a BUNCH of shows and is out in the back of the pit, having some little interactions with fans. i live vicariously through recommended reels etc.

2022- i read that book that sends me down larry/1d spiral. i learn more about harry in general. i wonder about his various scandals that i hadn’t paid attention to- any quick google of his dating history kind of underscores a lot of short relationships, loose acquaintanceships with one night stands.

he wrote Fine Line apparently gutted after ending a year long relationship with the french model camille rowe- she is the voicemail on cherry.

coachella sends me all the way to stan twitter- i mostly want to talk about harry and theorize about lyrics and generally have fun learning new things. by the time i get to larry, it is clear that there is subsection of harry stan twitter that is in fact no stunts larrie twitter. the “no stunts” is critical- it is demonstrating that you essentially believe all his “public” relationships have been stunts. 

that seems a little out-there, but as they say, i’m not one to yuck anyones yums. that side of twitter seems to be more queer and generally fun, so i mostly surround myself with people with that hard line. 

some hard lines get drawn within the community because larries are very protective- public acknowledgment of larry and larries always ends badly, and if you are a larrie you are at the mercy of antis (whose missions is to call larries brain damaged) or solos (who think one direction nostalgia is destructive)

anyway- you’re either with us or you’re against us is the attitude.

but research is encouraged, mining history for insights, rabbit holes and archival stuff like that! very fun.

i see someone say they flipped off olivia at coachella- feels disrespectful and rude. keep your theories to the internet, yknow.

anyway, over the course of the european summer tour, there is very much an attitude of “is she there” and when she was people felt sick and when she wasn’t people rejoiced. 

people would go about hating on olivia in ways that i didn’t feel like condoning, but a lot of the stuff was picked up and quoted in media as misogynists attacks by rabid harry fans who would criticize anyone dating him, calling her old/ugly/a bad mother who left her kids to follow her boyfriend pop star around. 

the stuff that people we referencing as criticisms were old trespasses- making jokes about “tranny”, “wishing she was black”, insensitive stuff verging in homophobic. it’s a smattering of stuff from 2012 onwards, but stuff that an adult should have known better.

some critical moments of don’t worry darling press: interview with emerald ferrell in a directors on directors interview- Olivia has a no assholes policy! 

just looking at her instagram numbers… it’s wild how much it has gone up 

[catelyngrant]

.

[carriagelamp]

Art of Aardman

I found myself a cheap copy of the Shaun the Sheep movie, so I was rewatching a bunch of Aardman films earlier this month and decided to hunt down some books too. For anyone that doesn’t know, Aardman is a British stop-motion studio that does fantastic work like Wallace and Gromit, Shaun the Sheep, Chicken Run, Early Man… tons of cool stuff. They’re always quirky and funny and warm-hearted. This was just a very nice art book for anyone that’s a fan of Aardman stop motion and wants to see a bit extra; it shows some cool concept art and blows up the neat details in Aardman work, especially in their intricate stuff like The Pirates! In an Adventure with Scientists!

Asterix and the Picts (Asterix and the Chariot Race, and How Obelix Fell Into The Magic Potion)

I decided to try a couple of the new Asterix comics that were done by the new team, just to see if they stand up to the old ones (that and How Obelix Fell Into The Magic Potion cause I’d never read that one before). They were pretty decent! Asterix and the Picts was my favourite of the two though I wouldn’t say either are going to contest for my favourite Asterix comic... but still! The art looks good and the stories felt like what I would expect, they made for a pleasant couple evenings of reading especially since it’s been so long since I’ve read a new Asterix comic. If you’ve never read Asterix it’s one of the biggest name French comic series in North America, as far as I know and very worth the read. It’s about a single Gaulish village that’s holding out against the invading Romans through sheer force of will, slapstick hijinks, and a magical super-strength potion brewed by their druid. Lots of fantastic visuals and cute wordplay, even in the English translations.

Bear

I found out about this bastion of Canadian literature via tumblr post that was losing its collective mind over the fact that some bizarre bear-based erotica novella somehow won the most prestigious literary prize available in Canada. Since I too found this hilarious and unspeakably bizarre I had to give it a read, obviously. And yes, the flat surface level summary is... a librarian moves out into rural Ontario and falls in love with a literal for-real not-supernatural-not-a-joke bear. And I have to say… it is actually worthy of an award, which I was not expecting given that I was there for a laugh. It has beautiful writing, and the subtextual story is pretty interesting… it kind of makes me think of The Haunting of Hill House actually in terms of themes. (Womanhood, personhood, independence, autonomy partially achieved through escaping the male gaze by claiming non-human lovers... listen if I were still in university I would right a paper comparing the two novels).

I dunno man, it’s fucking weird. Actually a well-written book, but sure is about a woman falling in love with a literal bear. Give it a read if you want something bonkers but like… high-brow bonkers.

Hunger Pangs: True Love Bites

Best book I have read in like… a while. A long while. I am not a fast reader, and I consumed 90% of this book over a weekend. It’s not at all like Terry Pratchett, but at the same time it scratched an itch for me that I haven’t had satisfied since Pratchett’s death. A very clever, hilariously funny poly romance between a disabled werewolf, an anxious vampire lord, and an incredibly powerful woman, with heaps of social satire, political commentary, and sinister undertones. The whole thing reads a bit like fanfiction and I say that in the most flattering way possible -- it is so easy to jump right in and be immediately taken over by the characters and the world and the plot, you never feel like you’re fighting to engage even though the world-building is fascinating and expansive. It welcomes you in right away, it was the book equivalent of a quilt and a hug which is something I sorely needed with all this pandemic bullshit. If you read any of the books on this list, go read that one while I sit here in pain waiting for the sequel.

Kid Paddle

I watched the cartoon of Kid Paddle as a kid and was thinking about it recently, so I decided to hunt down some of the original comics online. They’re fun and weird, with a cute art style and fantastic monsters designs. (My favourites are always about Kid either daydreaming or playing games that involve Midam’s weird warty troll creatures. It’s like a cross between Calvin and Hobbes and Foxtrot with the fun sort of quirks that I love in Belgian comics. Unfortunately, unlike Asterix, I’ve only come across these ones in French, but if you can read French it’s totally worth popping over to The Internet Archive and reading the ones they have available.

The Last Firehawk: The Golden Temple

The lastest Firehawk book. Despite being written for quite young readers, I did enjoy the early books in this series quite a bit. They’re about a young owl and squirrel who found an egg for a magical species that was believed to be extinct. With the newly hatched firehawk, the three of them head off on a mission to find an ancient firehawk magic that could save the entire forest. Very basic adventure story but a good intro to the tropes for children. Unfortunately the quality really feels like it drops with each subsequent book; this will probably be the last one I bother reading.

Lumberjanes: The Moon Is Up

I honestly think I enjoy these Lumberjanes novels even more than the comics just because it really gives time to delve into each story and examine how the camper are really thinking and feeling about everything. (Also I’m always weak for novelizations of anything.) The Moon Is Up is a book that focuses more on Jo, and takes place during the camp’s much anticipated Galaxy Wars, a competition between cabins that goes over several days. While the campers prepare for these challenges though, they also run into a strange little creature with a penchant for cheese and theft. Roanoke cabin needs to keep ahead in Galaxy Wars and somehow deal with the fearsome Moon Pirates that a closing in...

Lumberjanes v4 (Out Of Time)

One of the Lumberjanes comics, a cool, girl-focused, queer comic series. Honestly, this is just a fun series that I never got as into as I should have. My advice is honestly to skip book one because it gets better as it continues, and I’ve really been enjoying the later books now that I’ve given it another go. It follows five campers at Miss Qiunzella Thiskwin Penniquiqul Thistle Crumpet’s Camp for Hardcore Lady Types (Jo, April, Molly, Mal, and Ripley) as they handle all sorts of challenges, from friendship to crushes, camp activities to supernatural horrors, getting badges to not being brutally killed. Great if you liked the vibe of Gravity Falls but want it to be queer-er.

Mooncakes

Another queer graphic novel, but unfortunately not a very good one. It really looked appealing and I had high hopes, but the book itself really didn’t hold up… I actually couldn’t even finish it, the plot was just too… non-existent. The art is fairly mediocre once you actually look at it, especially backgrounds, and it feels very… placid. Not much conflict or excitement or even a very compelling reason to keep reading. If you just want a soft queer supernatural you may get more mileage out of it than me, but it didn’t really do it for me. There’s better queer graphic novels out there.

New Boy In Town

One of the worst books I have ever read. My girlfriend had ordered a very different book online but through a frankly stupendous error was sent this 1980s pulp romance instead. Absolutely nauseating on levels I couldn’t even begin to enumerate here. Naturally we read the whole thing out loud. Probably took us 10 times longer to finish than it warranted because I had to stop every two sentences to lose my mind. If you like bad decisions, baffling hetero courting rituals, built-in cultural Christianity without actually calling it that, and gold panning then boy howdy is this the book for you.

(seriously, you better have patience for gold-panning if you attempt this one, because I sure learn that I don’t)

Piggies

This was a picture book I enjoyed as a kid and had a reason to reread recently. Honestly it’s just very cute and simple, and the art is completely mesmerizing. Wonderful if you know a young child that would enjoy a simple goofy boardbook.

Shaun the Sheep: Tales From Mossy Bottom

Related to my Aardman fascination earlier this month. I tried reading a varieties of Shaun the Sheep books — most of which are mediocre at best — but the Tales From Mossy Bottom Farm series is genuinely good. Just chapter books, of course, but the illustrations match the series’ concept art and each story feels like it could have jumped directly out of an episode. They’re just cute and feel-good! Kinda like Footrot Flats but more for kids, and from the sheep’s perspective moreso than the dog’s.

[marbleheavy]

hi! Can you suggest anything with wlw media (preferably books?) I trust your choices!

[I tried reading pipabeth fics but I couldn't find any that doesn't immediately describe someone's tits and that was very disappointing]

omg yes!!!!!! ahhh this is so exciting!!!

The Priory of The Orange Tree by Samantha Shannon is an AMAZING high fantasy book! the romance is def a subplot but it’s still wlw and i would highly recommend this if you’re a fan of fantasy

Last Night at the Telegraph Club by Malinda Lo is a historical fiction book thats set in San Francisco in the 50s and it is amazing!! it talks about lesbian culture at the time, the red scare, anti-asian racism, and other topics. it’s SO good!

Honey Girl by Morgan Rogers is about a queer, black woman trying to figure out life (kind of a coming of age but she’s already an adult so not quite) and she meets her will-be wife and it’s just very touching. my only thing is that the author has a very unique style that i liked but it may not be everyones cup of tea.

The Seven Husbands of Evelyn Hugo by Taylor Jenkins Reid may be kind of overdone but I promise it’s worth it!! the characterization is so good and it’s very cool how the author incorporates media clippings into the story. would def recommend!!

A Lesson in Vengeance by Victoria Lee!! mmmm dark academia and cults, my FAVORITE niche. this book has also got witchcraft and a highly unreliable narrator! it is a bit pretentious but i think it’s important to remember that the book is critiquing academia too.

i also always have to mention Mary Oliver because i ADORE her poetry, she’s one of my favorite poets of all time. if you’re looking for love, i’d recommend her collections Felicity or Thirst.

also, i know this is super overdone, but just watch She-Ra. it’s so good. it’s wonderful. just do it.

i hope this was helpful!! i have more recs but i didn’t wanna overwhelm you bc books take longer to get through than fics :) especially the priory of the orange tree which is,,, large. she’s a big one. if you want any other recs, please ask!!

[queerlennon]

Lesley-Ann Jones Is Untrustworthy

So I’ve seen some people in the fandom reading and citing Lesley-Ann Jones’ biography The Search For John Lennon recently and to be honest it’s concerning to me. Lesley Ann Jones has proved in the past to be an extremely untrustworthy source for info about the people she writes about. I understand that it’s exciting to have a book about John that’s not written by the typical “Lennon biographer” type (aka an ageing straight man) and for said book to also promise to shed light and focus on his bisexuality but, if we’re going to analyse John respectfully and accurately, it’s important to identify sources that are biased and untrustworthy, even if they’re technically within our favour. Especially when it relates to his queerness. And seeing as LAJ doesn’t have the best record when it comes to writing about rockstars’ sexualities in a respectful manner, it’s best to treat her words with caution.

Info about exactly how she’s a bad source is under the cut

Firstly, it's key to talk about LAJ's journalistic background when discussing what sort of writer she is: she's worked for papers such as The Sun, The Daily Mail, and The Mail On Sunday. Essentially, the bulk of her work has been for tabloids and traditionally the writing style for those kinds of publications place an emphasis on sensationalism and gossip. Now obviously that doesn’t discredit her work immediately, authors are usually able to write in more than one style so it doesn’t necessarily mean the tabloid style is going to carry over to her biographies; but it’s good to keep in mind when discussing and analysing the legitimacy of the narratives she creates and the stories she recounts in her work. 

LAJ has received criticism in the past, particularly from the queen fandom of often overexaggerating, or just straight presenting false information in her bios about Freddie Mercury. She is the champion of the claim that Freddie was bisexual and not gay. Her evidence for this is over-exaggerating and (seemingly intentionally) misinterpreting the nature of the relationship between Freddie and his friend, Barbara Valentin. LAJ claimed that the two had a relationship and even lived together:

“Barbara was very open with me about the sexual relationship she had with Freddie.”

(x)

(x)

However, no-one in Freddie’s life has ever corroborated that Freddie and Barbara were anything but friends. As for the claim they lived together, according to Peter Freestone, an extremely close friend of Freddie’s:

In the event, Freddie never actually lived there although Barbara fulfilled a huge role in Freddie’s life at that time... Freddie became very disillusioned when with more and more frequency articles were appearing in the German press’s gossip columns... about the relationship between him and Barbara... After one article claiming to have knowledge of him and Barbara getting married, Freddie... concluded that it could only be Barbara who was providing the information.

(x)

This exaggeration of their relationship and the insistence LAJ has on presenting Freddie as bi because of it has attracted criticism from queen fans for obvious reasons. For one, it’s borderline homophobic to essentially lie about a gay man having a relationship with a woman while downplaying his relationships with men. No, she’s not portraying him as a straight man, however it’s still erasure of the specific struggles Freddie would’ve faced being a gay man in his time, therefore those who want to analyse him would be missing some of the picture when trying to understand him and his life

LAJ’s research methods are also... questionable. This is a post from Crystal Taylor (one of Roger Taylor’s roadies) about her methods for her David Bowie bio which, if to be believed is particularly concerning.

(x)

LAJ is also known to greatly exaggerate her own relationships with her subjects. She often claims to have been friends with the people she writes bios about (coincidently the people she does this with are dead.) Back in the day she would meet with artists while on tour so the idea is convincing enough. However besides her word there’s nothing to suggest that she had close friendships with Freddie or Bowie, two people she claimed to be good friends with. There’s also this comment from Brian May which actually goes against the idea that she was close with Freddie:

(x)

So with all of this in mind, let’s look at the quote from The Search For John Lennon that’s been circulating around Beatles tumblr:

That Bowie worshipped Lennon is no secret. He'd banged on about it often enough. The ex-Beatle had gone to his hedonism. They'd met in Los Angeles, during John's Lost Weekend. I lunched from time to time with David in New York while working there as a music journalist, before he married Iman. He lent me his house in Mustique, to write the first draft of my first biography on Freddie Mercury.

The crazy pair went out to play, according to David, when John was on yet another break from May and far away from Yoko. They genderbender-ed about, John indulging again that 'inner fag' of his. What larks.

They later 'hooked up': 'There was a whore in the middle, and it wasn't either of us,' David smirked. 'At some point in proceedings, she left. I think it was a she. Not that we minded.' By the time they made it back to New York, the ambisextrous pair were 'lifelong friends'.

I’m suspicious of this story for several reasons but first I want to make it clear that none of them have to do with John having sex with men or being bisexual. I’m a very firm believer of John’s bisexuality (my username is literally queerlennon lmao) but once again I think it’s good to examine the legitimacy of sources, even when they favour our position.

Firstly, LAJ’s source for this story is the claim that David told her, which considering I can’t find any info about them being friends besides her word, combined with the fact that she’s lied about having close relationships in the past raises a lot of flags.

But even if we assume LAJ isn’t lying and did know Bowie, the quote is still suspect, particularly the line “John was on yet another break from May and far away from Yoko.” According to May in her book Loving John, her and John had only one break from their relationship (the phrase “yet another break” implies multiple) that lasted a week, and for the entirety of that week, John was with Yoko. (x)

Finally, the language LAJ uses to describe John and David’s sexualities not only puts me on edge but very much makes me question her intention. Phrases like “the genderbender-ed about,” “indulged his ‘inner fag,’” and “ambisextrous,” all come across to me as fetishisation. Bisexuality is already very highly fetishised and sexualised and LAJ is most definitely not concerned with deviating from that representation. That phrasing combined with the way she also discusses Freddie’s sexuality, where she’s alleged highly sexualised claims about him having threesomes:

And quite often that involved other people as well. Other men, other women. There would be a number of them in the bedroom at any given time. In fact they were raided by the police once and the police stormed in and they found more people than they were expecting to find in the bed that morning.

(x)

— leads me to believe that LAJ is an author less concerned with exploring John’s sexuality as apart of his life, something that made him who he was, and more concerned with including details about “bisexual threesomes” as shock value, as a sensational point she can use to to promote her book in press tours and interviews. Like a tabloid writer. And this sort disrespect representation of John’s queerness, imo isn’t that much better than the biographers who dismiss or underplay it. I totally understand that for a lot of us, finding out new info about John’s queer identity is exciting, especially for those of us who are queer and identify with a lot with John for that reason, myself included. But we shouldn’t be giving credence and legitimacy to someone who firstly, isn’t trustworthy and secondly who’s reason for talking about it is gross and exploitative at best and biphobic at worst.

tl;dr, LAJ is an incredibly untrustworthy source of info and in her own over exaggerations, treats discussions of queerness in an extremely problematic and exploitive way so please take anything you read from her with a massive grain of salt.

[aethersea]

you know what, I never do these things, but actually I’ve decided I would like to get to know people better! I would like to partake of the mortifying ordeal! I would like to talk about myself for a bit!

ok for the next...let’s say five days I will answer any of these things that people tag me in, or any random personal questions you plop in my ask box. I don’t have an ask meme on hand but just....pick one you’ve seen recently, or make up questions of your own, and I’ll answer. (the answer might be ‘nope that’s private’ but I will answer.) (@ the anon who asked for book recs - I see you, I’ve been thinking of books all day, I’m going to give you SUCH a long answer, I hope you don’t regret your choices bc it WILL be full of gushing)

alright, let’s go!

🌻 Tag 9 people you want to get to know better

Tagged by @booksandchainmail​

Last Song: I’m currently listening to “Falcon in the Dive” from the Scarlet Pimpernel musical on loop. I watched one or two Scarlet Pimpernel movies when I was just barely too young to fully get what was going on, and the story’s held an odd but deep-seated place in my heart ever since. A few years ago I found out there’s a musical and most of the songs are pretty stellar (go listen to “Madame Guillotine” if you like big ensemble broadway numbers, it’s a banger, the bit where he cries out for God has been running through my mind on and off for a few days now haha not like that’s topical or anything), so every once in a while I spend a few days listening to them a lot.

Sometime last year I read the actual book, and got super into the whole concept of the Scarlet Pimpernel for a while. I plotted out Pimpernel aus for several fandoms, I read the entire wikipedia article, and I went looking for bootlegs of the musical. I didn’t find one, but I did find a full radioplay-style recording of the script, complete with full musical numbers, and listened to it like a podcast.

Reader, I was so disappointed. The play adds some scenes, bc a lot of the dramatic tension of the novel comes from internal conflict and that doesn’t stage super well, and the very first scene of this play – a play written in the NINETIES – features our dashing hero rescuing some aristocrats from a French prison, and then saying to the person in the next cell, who begs for rescue but is not an aristocrat, “We have enough of your kind in England.”

Enough! of your KIND! What in the merry frickety HECK my dudes!! The book has some rather unfortunate™ takes but it is from 1905, it’s regrettable but sadly to be expected. This play is from 1997. It has NO excuse. This scene wasn’t even in the book! What! the heck!

I was so disheartened that I lost my excitement for the play, and a couple songs later I stopped listening. It occurred to me just a few days ago that you could actually stage that ironically, with the person in the cell giving the audience a “can you believe this” look, and then the rest of the play could feature assorted non-aristocratic ensemble members constantly looking at the audience like they’re on The Office. And hey, maybe that’s what they did, or something similar – maybe that was never meant to be taken as a cleanly heroic stance, and the play deals with it in a complex way. It’s possible. I wouldn’t know. Kinda doubt it though, based on song lyrics.

Favorite Color: red, probably

Last Movie: I watched that new lesbian christmas movie with my family for christmas, the one with kirsten stewart and the guy from schitt’s creek. it’s very sweet and good and kinda sad, and I really enjoyed it. it also incidentally has the best gay best friend trope in probably anything ever, bc it’s not a trope (I didn’t realize until several hours after watching that it technically fits), it’s just a guy who is the protagonist’s best friend, and they’re just all gay, and then when he Gives Relationship Advice as a gay best friend always does, it’s advice about how to deal with your partner’s hangups around coming out.

actually every part of the gay best friend trope becomes better when they’re just best friends who are both gay. the big dramatic gestures (in this case, driving some ungodly distance in the snow on no notice) go from “haha how kooky” to “queer man will do anything he needs to to rescue his queer friend from an isolating & potentially triggering situation”. the relationship advice isn’t “honey you deserve some self-respect, treat yourself”, it’s a deeply sincere reminder of the vulnerability that is shared across almost everyone’s queer experience, and look I could ramble about this for a long time before reaching a coherent point but I’m INTO IT, okay? I’m into it.

Last Show: you want me to remember what show I last finished???? impossible, cannot be done, it was a long time ago and the adhd has eaten everything that happened before last week. here, instead I’ll tell you about another movie I watched, late at night with my mom in cozy companionship just a couple days ago. it’s called Quigley Down Under and it’s about a cowboy who goes to Australia and kills a bunch of racists, 10/10 would watch again. it’s from 1990 but it feels much older, with the music choices and the cinematography of a 70s Western. the cowboy is great, honorable and fearless and kind, but the breakaway star of this movie for me is the woman who attaches herself to his side and refuses to leave. her name is Cora, and she’s crazy, in the sense that she’s not altogether tethered to reality, but this never for a second diminishes her agency. she’s fierce and clever and compassionate, and she basically never does anything she doesn’t want to in the whole movie. her arc is about overcoming trauma by taking charge of her own fear and facing it head-on, she is never belittled or dismissed by the narrative or the protagonist, and look she’s just so cool. I love her. she’s so vibrantly alive. her story could probably have been handled with a bit more nuance, but honestly for the 90s it’s pretty great. I’m no expert, but I found nothing objectionable in it, just a bit of heavy-handedness.

anyway the theme of the movie is that racism is evil and racists deserve to be shot, and this too could have been handled better (not a single aboriginal character speaks a single line of english in this movie), but it follows through on that message in every way, while still being a fun kinda campy cowboy movie. overall a very good time.

Currently Watching: started showing my sister Hilda the other day, and she’s liking it! I love that show, it’s so incredibly cute. can’t wait to see season 2

Currently Reading: lmao I wish. lately the brain has firmly rejected all attempts to read anything of any length. currently pending, bc I was halfway through them when my brain stalled out, are tano’s fic What Does Kill You Can Make You Stronger, Too, a Toby Daye book - I think it was The Brightest Fell, I got like half a chapter in and haven’t picked it up in over a month, the Locked Tomb series, and probably a few other things too. ooh! also a book called Making Sex by thomas laqueur, which is my fancy academic reading that I’ve been doing in short bursts for the past year or two when I feel fancy and academic. it’s about the development of the concept of biological sex and of gender in Western society, and it’s fascinating. has among other things introduced me to the idea that until quite recently, fathers were a matter of faith. the mother? yeah, you can watch the baby pop out, we all know who the mother is. but the father? how can you know? how can you really know? we have paternity tests these days, but for all of human history up until now, we've just had to take fatherhood on faith. (not to mention we didn’t even know what fathers were contributing to the production of a fetus. clearly it was something, since you can’t get pregnant without a penis getting involved, but we have literally not known what until the past few decades. and that is wild. it has colored ALL of human history, all of our conceptions of society and family and kinship and gender, all of it, and it hadn’t even occurred to me until it was spelled out for me in this book, and it’s just......wow.

Salty, sweet or savory: for christmas my sister and I made seven different types of cookie, most of them involving chocolate somehow.

Craving: no bc I ate so many cookies. unless sleep counts. or maybe pringles, it’s been many moons since last I had a potato chip and I miss them.

Coffee or Tea: no thank you

Tagging: @coloursisee, @krchy-tuna, @sam-j-squirrel, @xzienne, @mirandatam, @viciousmaukeries, @sepulchritude, @elidyce, and @navigatorsnorth bc it’s been a while since we’ve talked, and I’m super hyped that you’re married now. v happy for you!

[maddie-grove]

Little Book Review: Tell Me Again How a Crush Should Feel

Author: Sara Farizan.

Publication Date: 2014.

Genre: Contemporary YA.

Premise: Leila Azadi, a Persian-American seventeen-year-old, already feels like an outsider, both at home (where her well-meaning but staid parents constantly compare her to her goody-goody older sister) and at her fancy Boston day school (where all her classmates seem to have it more together than her, plus they're mostly white and blithely ignorant). She doesn't want to risk making things worse by revealing that she's attracted to other girls. Then gorgeous, exciting Saskia arrives on the scene. She thinks Leila's beautiful and fascinating, plus she's mixed-race and can relate to some of Leila's experiences. Unfortunately, she's also cruel and unpredictable. Who can Leila turn to for help, when that would mean disclosing information that she's afraid of sharing?

Thoughts: Sometimes, the people who should be the most able to emphasize with us use that insight not to build a genuine connection, but instead to hurt and exploit. This summer, I read three books--one YA novel, one literary thriller, and one memoir--that explored this unhappy but important idea. Tell Me Again How a Crush Should Feel was the least impressive of the three, due to some tonal and stylistic issues, but I still liked it a lot. Farizan strikes a good balance between warning queer young women to keep their bullshit meter on and showing positive romantic relationship between women as commonplace (specifically in a romance between Leila and an old friend who has a gentle James Dean vibe).

The novel's strongest point, though, is its family relationships. Leila's parents obviously care about and value her from the jump; they're just out of their depth and oblivious to the effect of always pointing to her twenty-something older sister as an example. It's really moving to watch them reevaluate their priorities out of love for their struggling daughter. The older sister is also a delightful surprise; Leila initially assumes that their parents' idealized view of her is the truth and resent her for it, but gradually realizes that her sister is an imperfect, independent-minded young woman like herself. I also enjoyed Leila's painfully realistic self-consciousness, particularly in a scene where she auditions for the school play and freaks out over a minor setback.

The most persistent issue in the novel is Farizan's somewhat unpolished writing style. I don't have much to say about that; it'll either work for you as part of the first-person narrative or detract from your experience. The more interesting problem is Saskia, whose larger-than-life erratic meanness is both a strength and a weakness. On one hand, I got excited whenever she was on the page, because I knew the drama was about to get scandalous. She's a small-scale Ellen from Leave Her to Heaven; she even poisons a girl so she can mack on Leila. I'm here for it! On the other hand, she's way too big for the rest of this heartfelt, intimate novel. It didn't make the book less fun, but I found myself wondering, "Do the characters think this shit is as weird as I do? Because I feel like they're under-reacting."

Hot Goodreads Take: Some reviewers have raised concerns that the portrayal of Saskia is biphobic, because she (a) has sexual relationships with both Leila and her male best friend and (b) is a baby version of Ellen from Leave Her to Heaven. I get where they're coming from, but, as a bisexual, it didn't rub me the wrong way. Leila's ultimate love interest is also a girl who seems interested in girls and guys without using a specific term to describe herself, and she's perfectly nice. Plus Leila thinks plenty of negative thoughts about Saskia, yet they never revolve around her sexuality.

[rotationalsymmetry]

So that I’m posting about something other than tumblr drama, have some old as fuck webcomic recs. In general some of these have adult themes but none are unsafe for work. Most of these I found back around 2006-2008, when I was reading webcomics as my main form of not doing whatever I was supposed to be doing.

The Princess: cute comic about a trans girl. Girl as in not an adult. (Themes of transphobia, but overall positive/optimistic tone. Not an adult themes comic.)

Darths and Droids: screencap comic of Star Wars as a table top role playing game. Very well executed. Keeps making me want to read DM of the Rings but every time I try I get disappointed. Warning: there is a lot of it. (As best I can recall this comic doesn’t get any raunchier than the movies.)

Questionable Content: I’m doing current page rather than first page on this one. If you go back to the beginning, be aware that it gets better and much more queer later on. Also has a lot. Slice of life/coffeeshop original. Has a recurring theme of “character is lonely and bad at doing the having friends thing, makes friends.” Nobody can keep track of all the characters.

Queen of Wands: the webcomic that got me into webcomics. (Some stuff might have not aged well? I haven’t read it in a while. A bit of polyamorous rep near the end. Slice of life. Young adults being young adults. Starts with a joke of the day format, has some high drama arcs later on. Has an actual ending.) (the follow-up comic Punch and Pie nominally has an ending but I found it kind of unsatisfying? It’s enjoyable on a strip to strip basis though. Realistic polyamorous rep in that “polyamorous, but is not actually seeing anyone or is only seeing one person at a time in practice” is in fact pretty common.)

The Devil’s Panties: less exciting than it sounds, but kinda a comfort comic in a weird way. Apparently still going. Slice of life/autobiographical. Has fun with the shoulder angel/shoulder demon trope. This comic has a special place in my heart because it covered the protagonist breaking up with a long time partner when I was working up the nerve to do the same thing. Also, it’s written by a Unitarian Universalist.

Dykes to Watch Out For: has some formatting issues. Origin of the Bechdel Test. It’s about dykes. And feminism. And being the sort of dork who doesn’t know how to connect with people except by ranting about politics. Relatable?

Manic Pixie Nightmare Girl (sorry you’ll have to google for it): this one is kinda dark but it’s, uh, something. Trans woman creator.

Hyperbole and a Half: I’m throwing you into the middle of this one. Link is for one of the depression strips. Title is accurate. Autobiographical. There’s physical books now so this is something you might be able to get from the library or bookstore if you’d rather have paper.

1/0: this is a terrible comic, do not read it. (Man, I miss the early days of webcomics where half the creators had zero art skills.) (No really, I do. It feels dramatically harder to find new webcomics now and I don’t know why. Sometimes you just want to read super random amateur shit, you know?)

A girl and her fed. I don’t know what to say about this. The art style changes dramatically. There’s a talking koala with a bad attitude and the ghost of Benjamin Franklin. I have no idea what the genre is supposed to be.

Spikey haired dragon, worthless knight: black and white comic with light fantasy elements. Kind of a downer just so you know. No longer active. Weekly links to flash games that may or may not still be working.

Phoebe and her unicorn: kinda like Calvin and Hobbes if Calvin was a girl and Hobbes was a self-absorbed unicorn. This one’s family-friendly.

Kimchi cuddles: the touchy-feely polyamory webcomic.

Anyways, enjoy, or don’t, it’s up to you.

[bronanlynch]

bi-ish weekly update

time sure passes huh. meant to do one last week but I wrote like 5000 words on Wednesday instead, and I’m not really sure what happened yesterday but maybe Thursday is my new day for these

listening: two for the price of one this week since I’m excited about both of them. first of all, obviously, is the Sangfielle theme by Jack de Quidt because it’s time for a new season of Friends at the Table. I love their description of this season’s music

the other thing I’ve been listening to is the new album from one of my fave bands, You’re Welcome from A Day to Remember. this is by far not the most musically interesting or complex song on the album but it is about, as far as I can tell, a bad breakup with a vampire and I love it for that just on principle, but also it’s fun! a fun pop punk-esque bop about breaking up with a vampire!

reading: since last time when I talked about many romance novels I was reading, I mostly just read more romance novels because sometimes that is all the brain can handle. shout out to KJ Charles for writing a historical romance with a nonbinary main characters, you really do love to see it. I appreciate that she puts trans characters in her books, and I hope that someday she writes one with a trans man as a main character, because that truly would be a book targeted directly at me.

I’ve also been reading the Kate Kane, Paranormal Investigator series by Alexis Hall (author of Affair of the Mysterious Letter, a weird fantasy queer Sherlock Holmes retelling that absolutely fucking slaps, highly recommend).

this is his author bio from the Kate Kane books, which really just sets the tone and also. what a fucking life goal

anyway. series starts with Iron & Velvet which is currently on sale, which is why I bought it, and it also fucking slaps. I’m like halfway through the last book right now but they have all been good and fun. Kate is like. archetypal disaster p.i. but done in an interesting way (i.e. the narrative actually addresses the depression and the alcoholism in a way that I personally really appreciated), and also pretty much every woman in the ~supernatural community she encounters is an ex or someone she will flirt/hook up with at some point, which is an accurate representation of every irl queer space I’ve ever been part of. she dates a vampire for a while. hot morally questionable vampire lady. the vampire power structure names positions after tarot cards it’s very fun and sexy and tailored specifically toward my interests. also she lives in the same part of London as my ex-girlfriend so it’s. fun to recognize place names and be like. oh I went there on a date once huh

watching: started watching Turn A Gundam because a twitter friend recommended it as being fun and also very different then any other Gundam series and they were right on both counts. the premise of it is ‘what if a bunch of people went to live on the moon and some people stayed on earth, the moon people got real into super advanced technology and the earth people are larping the 19th century, and now the moon people want to come back’ so there’s a fun mix of visual styles. would love to see serious analytical writing on this show by someone more versed in discussing indigeneity/colonialism than me though because there are things that I’m a little bit hmmm at but I don’t know enough to be able to explain why or know if that’s the right response to have

don’t know what’s up with the dude on the left’s sunglasses but my friend has promised me the fashion choices only get weirder

I know about the ‘wow cool robots’ meme but some of the mech designs are very cool and visually distinct both from each other and from the standard blocky humanoid shape that lots of mechs are, so that’s fun to see. and they’re all different sizes too, which for me at least makes it easier to get a sense of the scale of the conflict/threat. when they’re all the same size it’s easy for me to forget they’re like 40 feet tall but when some of them are 40 feet and some of them are like 10 feet it’s a lot easier to be like. oh. oh shit. these are big and destructive and scary as hell

there are mini versions of this big mech that are like. the size of one of its feet

also there’s some fun stuff about how the way society relates to a mech and what a mech is used for can change over time, which is part of what is maybe inspiring me to get back into trying to write games, because between Turn A and the fic I was writing about Integrity Friendsatthetable I was like. hey what if a hack of The Ground Itself by Everest Pipkin, a game about a place changing over time, except instead of a place it’s a mech

playing: finished Knife of Dunwall finally! please clap! I was kinda half-expecting not to keep to low chaos in the last mission because there are so many overseers but I did it! I did do a bunch of accidentally getting into fights, killing a bunch of people, and then reloading an earlier save so I could go back and not kill those people but it’s fine. anyway. fun game, fun level once I got the hang of it, and I do feel like I accomplished something a lil bit difficult so that’s a nice feeling. definitely harder than the main game. also, very sad about Billie and gay for Delilah. she shows up just to threaten you and then disappears again, and I think that’s pretty hot of her. also love the narrative parallels of having the choice to spare Billie and then the game ending with Corvo about to decide whether to spare Daud or not. I just think that’s neat

making: made some Thai green curry last week from this recipe, which was tasty and not too hard to make, but has just enough specialty ingredients to make it a lil bit too expensive to make too often. our grocery store only ever has lemongrass when we’re looking for things that look kinda like lemongrass but aren’t, and didn’t have any when we need it so we just used extra lemongrass paste and lime juice for the lemongrass, and for the kaffir lime leaves, which we were also supposed to substitute with lemongrass but. it’s fine it was still tasty

writing: a lot somehow, although it’s been over two weeks since last time I did one of these so I guess that makes sense. I wrote a couple of things for 15 Days of Friends at the Table, including Broun, Milli, and Thisbe cottagecore roommates, Clem and Gucci bickering/flirting, and an extended dream sequence that makes me very sad about Integrity (I’m very proud of the last one, I know it has a very small target audience because Sokrates/Integrity is very much a rarepair in an already small fandom, there are 6 works in the tag, 4 of them are by me, 2 of them are by the same other person, and one of those is a gift for me so. it’s mostly just me, but I think I wrote something pretty good)

also meant to write more for Persona 5 Girls Week, although so far I’ve only written one thing, a quick fluff fic which for once requires very little knowledge of the source material. meant to write something for today’s prompt but instead I had two job interviews and then cooked dinner for my household so that probably will not happen and I will probably watch more Gundam instead

[yurimother]

LGBTQ Manga Series Review - Kiss and White Lily for My Dearest Girl

The tenth and final volume of Kiss and White Lily for My Dearest Girl is finally out in English, and honestly, I expected this moment to feel more climatic. This long-running series debuted in 2013 and quickly became one of the most consistently popular Yuri works in the current era. However, perhaps because of its relative longevity, it always felt like the background; The consistently safe and trope-filled home I could return to after exploring new and exciting Yuri works. There is often something comforting about home, and many of the cute kisses and relationships featured are joyful and entertaining.

Kiss and White Lily for My Dearest Girl is a Yuri manga series by Canno. It follows numerous couples at Seiran Academy, a fictional middle and high school with a sister university. The common themes and tropes of the Yuri genre riddle the work. Some are seen in individual couple’s stories, while others, such as the all-girls school, style of uniforms, and repeated girl meets girl then love narrative. While these tropes are by no means a negative, being a fan of this genre would be impossible if they were, they are such old hat for Yurijin that they become dull, and Kiss and White Lily does little to forward or subvert them. In this way, the series feels like a showcase of the genre, a series I can thrust at people and say, “you want to learn about Yuri? Then read this” (an honor I usually reserve for Whispered Words). In short, the series is enjoyable but tiring and predictable.

Before I get into the spoiler-filled breakdown of each couple, there are a few overarching elements to note. It is achingly sweet, not in a heartwarming way, but an “I just a bit down on cake and have a cavity” way. Nothing in the first few volumes has any real consequence or impact; it is just cute and stupid. Now I like cute and stupid, but it has to be fun and enjoyable to read, and at first, this is not. Many characters lack chemistry, and often, the drama is caused by their own nonsensical choices rather than from the complications that come with relationships or friendships. If I do not like these characters together, I do not want to see them hugging and kissing and being cute.

You may have noticed that I spoke of how I enjoyed the series but then went on a rant about how weak the plot is. Fortunately, as the series goes on, the writing improves drastically. Characters who are in or are moving towards relationships, mostly, have compatible traits, and with stakes grounded in some form of reality. The What’s Behind the Story!? Sections, single pages devoted to the perspectives of random other characters and couples, are another welcome addition. Here, the lack of consequence or chemistry works, as each is given only a few moments to give a one-liner or snapshot of service. 

The artwork in Kiss and White Lily suffers from a similar problem as the plot. It is too adorable for the sake of being adorable. Kurosawa reacts with a huge smile and sudden anthropomorphic ears far too often in the early volumes. There are other inconsistencies also, mainly in tone. For example, in the first volume, there is a moment where one character is being introspective and dramatic, when suddenly, in a moment of metaphoric imagery, another is holding a gun to her head. This scene is awkward and unnecessary. No other moment uses such visual tricks to illustrate emotional conflict, and it is completely removed from the rest of the work. Finally, the artwork is cluttered. Almost every panel has so much crammed into it feels overwhelming.

However, just as the problems with art and story are similar, so are the solutions, time. As Canno continues, the art drastically improves. It takes on a more consistent tone, relies less on visual tricks, and quickly becomes one of the series’ highlights. Seeing the characters be gentle and affectionate will put a smile on all but the most begrudged reader’s face, especially with the more likable characters. Canno also makes frequent use of beautiful double-page spreads, many of which I have bookmarked so I can refer to them when I need a smile.

Now that I have gotten those points out of the way, I can get down into the meat of Kiss and White Lily for My Dearest Girl, the couples. There is an explosive plethora of pairings in this series, and I love it. Each feels unique, has a compelling story (mostly), and a satisfying conclusion. Every reader will easily find their favorites or see their own life reflected in one of these cute couples.

Ayaka Shiramine and Yurine Kurosawa are the principal couple of Kiss and White Lily, and their courtship spans all ten volumes. Unfortunately, they start out as one of the weaker couples in the story. Shiramine is the model student, working hard, helping out at the school, and getting high grades. However, she is consistently ranked second in all tests (teacher’s side note here, publicly posting student’s grades has been shown in research to be horrible for student achievement by multiple studies) behind Kurosawa. However, unlike Shiramine, Kurosawa does not try at all; she usually sleeps through class and does not participate in school activities, and succeeds only by her “genius.” Kurosawa’s effortless achievements anger Shiramine, and she confronts her about it. However, Kurosawa is pleased by the notion of Shiramine beating her and begins to aggressively pursue a relationship (the aggressive gay woman is the worst trope. Consent and enthusiasm are a central part of romance).

In what seems to be a running theme for this series, Shiramine and Kurosawa’s relationships improve as the books go on. First, Shiramine becomes less of a stereotypical tsundere character, as her motivation for being the best is revealed, a cold and frankly awful mother who scoffs at her daughter’s achievements. Likewise, Kurosawa, who starts incredibly inconsistent, moving from peppy to cruel to bored within the span of a few pages, settles down into a more calm character, with her enthusiastic love for Shiramine intact.

The beginning of their romance was weak, mainly due to their personalities and lack of chemistry, but the end conclusion was incredibly satisfying. Kurosawa realizes that she came to love Shiramine because she thought the perfect student could beat her and make her a normal girl, not a genius. However, in the end, she realizes that it was not their grades, but the ways Shiramine drew her out of her shell and THE FRIENDS SHE MADE ALONG THE WAY that made her a better person. Shiramine changes too, becoming more courageous and finally standing up to her horrid mother, thus breaking the spell the woman had over her and freeing Shiramine of her burdens.

In the final volume, Shiramine realizes that she likes being with Kurosawa and that their rivalry was her favorite part of the school. These feelings are all admitted in a fantastic speech she gives to the incoming students. I was smiling throughout the whole second half of Volume 10 as their relationships reached its inevitable conclusion, and for that, I offer praise.

Mizuki Senoo is the star of the track team where Moe Nikaidou, her longtime friend, is the manager. These two are one of my favorite couples, but they also have the most problems of any. Both girls are entirely captivated by and devoted to each other, so much so that they become codependent. However, the way they address this codependency is horrible. Moe suddenly stops talking to Mizuki, which severely distresses the athlete and leads to poorly written angst. There is no logic, only nonsense choices made for the sake of plot. Of course, they resolve the issue, everything is happy and pleasant, and they decide to be together forever. And then (and this is my favorite part) they graduate and go to university and live together! This action is perhaps the one time that Kiss and White Lily manages to forgo the conventions of the genre and begins to approach queer representation. Mizuki and Moa are no longer bound by the walls of the high school, the confines of Catholic school style uniforms, the tropes of Yuri, but they are free adults who love each other and are together. It is a perfect ending, which does not excuse the atrocious middle. 

Volume 2 introduces to Chiharu Kusakabe and her roommates Maya Hoshino and Ai Uehara. These three are close and live together perfectly. However, as Maya is older than Ai and Chiharu, she will be graduating soon and leaving them behind. Chiharu struggles with her conflicted feelings for her senpai, with whom she has fallen in love. On the one hand, Chiharu wants Maya to be happy and go to a good university; on the other, she selfishly wants her to stay close. Chiharu begins to close herself off, but then she meets the stubborn (idiot) Izumi Akizuki.

The two girls start a sort of reluctant friendship, where Chiharu waits outside the school each morning to chastise Izumi for riding her bike, which is against school rules. However, Izumi does not stop riding her bike, and Chiharu never reports her. They grow closer, and Izumi helps Chiharu reconcile her relationship with Maya. Eventually, they start dating. It is all cute and wholesome. As these two get together early in the series, the reader has lots of time to enjoy them being together as they appear frequently. The conflicts in their relationships are grounded in reality, and working through them together has a clear positive effect on the character. The only complaint I have is that after they start dating, they mostly keep it a secret for no reason.

Towako Mita and Yukina Ooshiro are one of the worst couples in the manga. They are the only members of the gardening club, although they eventually recruit Kurosawa. As the club is so small, it is always on the edge of dismantlement, as the student council wants to move resources elsewhere. While Ooshiro works to save it, Towako is actively working behind her back to end the club. Her reasoning, she does not want things to change. That’s it, full stop, it is complete nonsense. Of course, they make up and decide to be together with an equally illogical apology. If characters are going to hurt others and then be forgiven there must be effort, reason, and care put into them, traits all lacking in this story. It is all awful.

The fourth volume is a mix: containing some of the series best moments and its worst, by which I mean, most boring. Moe and Mizuki’s romance reaches the spectacular crescendo previously referenced. But, half the volume is spent depicting Kaoru Machida, Kohagi Inoue, and Momiji Shikama. The relationship between these three is focused more on friendship than sexual or romantic desire (cough cough S). Actually, I do not mind this at all, but they. Are. So. Boring. I honestly forgot they existed in the first draft of this review and had to reread Volume 4 to remind myself of them. The fact that I am writing about this process instead of the actual characters says a lot about their lack of appeal.

Sawa Itoh and Itsuki Nishikawa are equally forgettable. They are easily the most mundane romantic couple in the series. The two knew each other long ago, but Sawa forgot about their friendship, much to Itsuki’s disappointment. However, they bond again as high school students and vow to make up for the lost time. Their story ends with Itsuki confessing her feelings for Sawa. Sawa returns those feelings in kind FIVE VOLUMES LATER. That is far too long to wait for a dull ending. NEXT!

Ryou Hiramu, Nina Yuunagi, and Amane Asakura make up Kiss and White Lily’s only three-person relationships and is one of the best. Polyamory is not everyone’s cup of tea. Still, in the context of fiction, their relationship works well and develops excitingly, complete with a healthy dose of melodrama. Hiramu begins to grow close to Asakura, much to the anger of Asakura’s roommate Yuunagi. Yuunagi wants Asakura all to herself, a point made abundantly clear to Hiramu. However, things get more complicated when Hiramu realizes that Yuunagi is an online friend of hers.

Yuunagi feels incredibly lonely, and her only real friend is Asakura. But, when Hiramu shows her kindness, Yuunagi begins to fall for Hiramu. Yuunagi feels incredible guilt over this, swearing that she should only need Amane and not wanting to compete for Hiramu’s affection. Their tale ends when a distraught Yuunagi runs away before being confronted by Hiramu and Asakura. There, in a tearful confession, she released her jealousy, her guilt, and her confusion. Despite being overblown, it is one of the most relatable and truthful emotional moments in the manga. The solution, Yuunagi does not have to choose; she can have more loves. It is a mature answer that, while not ideal for most, makes sense here and is healthy for all the characters.

The next volume focuses on Haine Aoi and her close in age aunt Aika Yukimura (who is more like her sister). Before anyone breaks out the pitchforks or plants this volume next to Citrus on their bookshelf, the relationship is not sexual. This intention is explicitly shown in a scene where Aika contemplates kissing her sleeping niece (creepy) but decides against it, saying, “I don’t actually want to kiss her.” This moment deliberately and awkwardly setting the parameters of their relationships as not sexual. However, there are clear romantic implications. As the two struggle with the idea of drifting apart as most “sisters” do, they decide that this will not happen to them, and they will only grow stronger together. Ultimately, they declared themselves to be soulmates, albeit platonic ones.

This relationship is the most divisive of the series. There will be some, such as myself, who can acknowledge the apparent class s ties and the familial relationship yet can still enjoy the wholesome and grounded story. However, many others will understandably have difficulty overlooking these aspects of the narrative. I invite readers to give this volume a look and decide for themselves. Even if it turns out that Haine and Aika’s storyline is not for you, Shiramine and Kurosawa are at their best here and will save the volume for you. However, whether or not you like this couple, can we all agree that the decision to feature a major story act about a piano player (Haine) and NOT include a piano duet is INSANE!! Canno is not at all coy with Yuri tropes in this series, and this exclusion will not stand!

Nagisa Tatsumi and Hikari Torayama are rivals, opponents in the student council president election, and secretly roommates. The two live together by necessity, with their adorable kitten. Neither one can stand the other. However, when given the opportunity to separate, they decide they would prefer to continue living together. There is not much here. Even though one is labeled as “nice” and the other “mean,” Nagisa and Hikari have the same personality. The other “tsundere” type character in Kiss and White Lily, Shiramine, works because she is given time to grow and develop as a complicated character and because she is paired with someone different than here. Unfortunately, aside from some cute trope-filled moments like an accidental kiss, these two are insignificant. But. perhaps I am too hard on them, as I am conditioned to expect Yuri featuring characters named Nagisa and Hikari to be far more dramatic, grandiose, and interesting

Asuka Sakurada and Mikaze Hagimoto are the final couple introduced, as the next and final volume is only concerned with wrapping up previously established relationships. A shame, as they are the single most problematic and dysfunctional couple presented. Sakurada and Hagimoto are both cosplayers, which is how they meet, and the younger Hagimoto quickly asks Sakurada out. Sakurada is awful. She is cruel, detached, and rude to almost everyone. After an injury forced her to repeat her final year at Seiran Academy, causing her to be somewhat jaded, to say the least. What little the reader sees of their romance, which last all of a dozen pages, is appalling. Sakurada is mean and unaffectionate, and Hagimoto attempts to force her into activities she does not want to do. They break up quickly, and the rest of the volume plays out like a tragic love story, as Hagimoto pines for her senpai, and Sakurada says dramatic lines about how she “can never go back.” Of course, by the end, they have made up and are together again.

Not only are we giving this vile relationship, but excellent moments of emotional distress are wasted on them. For example, Hagimoto delivers a tearful and moving speech on a train platform. There is also a rare moment of clarity from Hagimoto, where she realizes that she did nothing to make the relationship work, followed by an admittance from Hagimoto that she just wanted to be more like Sakurada. Now, characters realizing their mistakes and faults to move forward and become better, as individuals and a couple is incredible; however, there needs to be a solid foundation. The unfortunate truth is that such tragic and dramatic relationships take time and investment. The reader needs to want to see these characters get better and make up, something notably lacking here. This awful partnership tarnishes the beautiful scenes present.

Fortunately, Volume 9 is not a total loss, far from it. Shiramine and Kurosawa complete their personal arcs described previously in this review, thus clearing the way for Volume 10 to finally have them get together, perform a quick survey of the other characters, and tie up any dangling story threads in a bow covered with cute kisses and gentle service.

Kiss and White Lily for My Dearest Girl is an incredibly mixed bag of a series. It gives a wide variety of couples and tropes for the reader to enjoy, but many of the relationships suffer significantly from weak characters or uninteresting storylines. Its mediocre start does not help the series. Early outings are noticeably lacking in all categories from plot to artwork, which provides a difficult barrier for entry. However, there is a lot to love here. It is a spectacular showcase of Yuri and an absolute classic of the genre’s current era. Kiss and White Lily is THE YURI MANGA, a title that bears both the great and terrible of the genre.

This series concluding publication feels appropriate for the genre’s centennial. The tropes it features, which have paraded the genre for the past hundred years, will not go away. But, the conclusion of Kiss and White Lily feels, at least for the moment, like their last hurrah before stepping back to let a new century’s worth of newer and queerer works make their mark in the genre.

Ratings: Story – 6 Characters – 4 Art – 7 LGBTQ – 8 Sexual Content – 2 Final – 5

Kiss and White Lily for My Dearest Girl, Vol. 10 review copy provided by Yen Press ( @yenpress​ )

You can get the series digitally and in print today: Kiss and White Lily for My Dearest Girl, Vol. 10 - https://amzn.to/34k8sAj

[ninaraise2020]

2020 Book List

For 2020, I made a new years resolution to read 52 books by the end of the year.... which is one of the first new years resolutions I’ve actually kept!! Here are some of my favorites, and my thoughts about everything I read.

As a note: I know audiobooks // ebooks aren’t everyone’s thing, but I read most of these through the Brooklyn Public Library using Libby, and through HOOPLA, the LAPL app. HOOPLA has a ton of stuff, and all you need is to write down an LA address to get a virtual library card. (And just saying, they don’t do anything to confirm that’s your actual address...)

MY LIST with favorites bolded (in the order I read them)

The first bad man, Miranda July  

Can’t we talk about something more pleasant, roz chast

Killing and Dying, Adrian Tomine

The Idiot, Elif Batuman

Bad Friends, Ancco 

Fully coherent plan: for a better society, David Shrigley

Through a Life, Tom Haugomat

A Body Worth Defending, Ed Cohen

The Hospital Suite, John Porcellini

Excuse Me, Liana Finck

Ongoingness, Sarah Manguso

The Romance of Tristan, Beroul

Two Kinds of Decay, Sarah Manguso

Unfinished Business, Vivian Gornick

300 Arguments, Sarah Manguso 

No one belongs here more than you, Miranda July

Anti-Diet, Christy Harrison

Women, Chloe Caldwell

Romance or the End, Elaine Kahn

How to Murder Your Life, Cat Marnell

Rubyfruit Jungle, Rita Mae Brown

A Body Undone, Christina Crosby

Delta of Venus, Anaïs Nin

Sick, Porochista Khakpour 

Autobiography of Red, Anne Carson

Eros the Bittersweet, Anne Carson

Norma Jean Baker of Troy, Anne Carson

Hunger, Roxanne Gay

Grief Sequence, Prageeta Sharma 

The Undying, Anne Boyer

Illness as Metaphor, Susan Sontag

Gut Feminism, Elizabeth A. Wilson

Come as You Are, Emily Nagoski

Practicalities, Marguerite Duras

The Soft Life, Bridgette Talone

Look at Me, Anita Brookner

The Cancer Diaries, Audre Lorde

Zami, Audre Lorde

Fearing the Black Body, Sabrina Strings

Unbearable lightness, Portia di Rossi

The Art of Cruelty, Maggie Nelson

The Marriage Plot, Jeffrey Eugenides

The Red Parts, Maggie Nelson

Jazz, Toni Morrison

The Virgin Suicides, Jeffrey Eugenides

Motherless Brooklyn, Jonathan Lethem

Pain Studies, Lisa Olstein

The Left Hand of Darkness, Ursula k. Le Guin

Song of Achilles, Madeline Miller

Catalogue of Unabashed Gratitude, Ross Gay

Coeur de Leon, Ariana Reines

On Earth We’re Briefly Gorgeous, Ocean Vuong

TOP 10 Books (in no order)

The Cancer Diaries, Audre Lorde

Song of Achilles, Madeline Miller

Eros the Bittersweet, Anne Carson

Unfinished Business, Vivian Gornick

The Marriage Plot, Jeffrey Eugenides

Autobiography of Red, Anne Carson

Zami, Audre Lorde

 Catalogue of Unabashed Gratitude, Ross Gay

Come as You Are, Emily Nagoski

Coeur de Lion, Ariana Reines

Favorite queer books

Song of Achilles, Madeline Miller

Rubyfruit Jungle, Rita Mae Brown

The Cancer Diaries, Audre Lorde

Zami, Audre Lorde

Autobiography of Red, Anne Carson

On Earth We’re Briefly Gorgeous, Ocean Vuong

Catalogue of Unabashed Gratitude, Ross Gay

Favorite books about illness

Sick, Porochista Khakpour

A Body Undone, Christina Crosby

The Cancer Diaries, Audre Lorde

The Undying, Anne Boyer

Gut Feminism, Elizabeth A. Wilson

Pain Studies, Lisa Olstein

Two Kinds of Decay, Sarah Manguso

Favorite graphic novels

Through a Life, Tom Haugomat

The Hospital Suite, John Porcellini

Excuse Me, Liana Finck

Can’t we talk about something more pleasant? Roz Chast

Killing and Dying, Adrian Tomin

Favorite nonfiction

Fearing the Black Body, Sabrina Strings

Anti-Diet, Christy Harrison

The Art of Cruelty, Maggie Nelson

Gut-Feminism, Elizabeth A. Wilson

Come as You Are, Emily Nagoski

A Body Worth Defending, Ed Cohen

AND..... if you’re interested in seeing my thoughts on each book.....

A Complete List of Every Book I Read in 2020 and My Thoughts (listed in the order read)

The first bad man, Miranda July

This book is absolutely wild, and I greatly enjoyed it – I don’t think it’s everyone’s cup of tea, but if you’re looking for something very funny, surreal and visceral, I’d recommend. I described it to my friend as like if my psyche wrote a book, or like a very true dream. I enjoyed her collection of short stories, No One Belongs Here More Than You, more - but they’re both excellent.

Killing and Dying, Adrian Tomine

This was the first graphic novel I read this year. Zadie Smith said about this book, “Adrian Tomine has more ideas in twenty panels than novelists have in a lifetime,” so I was very intrigued. It reminds me a lot of Nick Drnaso’s Sabrina which is one of my favorite (if not my favorite) graphic novels. I love the book’s minimalist style, and bits of it felt like getting punched emotionally – so I’d recommend if you’re looking for that!

Can’t we talk about something more pleasant? Roz Chast

Roz Chast’s memoir about her parent’s final years is incredibly funny and beautifully done. I think New York Jews will especially enjoy – but I’d recommend to anyone!

The Idiot, Elif Batuman

For whatever reason, this book really grated on my nerves and I was not a fan. Batuman writes about a freshman at Harvard studying linguistics and writing emails to this man I wanted to punch. A lot of people love this book, so I definitely wouldn’t say not to read it – perhaps it just triggered too much of my anxiety from freshman year of college to be pleasurable. I find it similar to Jeffrey Eugenides’ The Marriage Plot, but I liked The Marriage Plot significantly more. 

Bad Friends, Ancco 

Content warning for abuse/violence – this graphic novel is really dark, and the violence is quite graphic. But overall, I thought it was beautifully done – and I really love the author’s drawing style. 

Fully coherent plan: for a better society, David Shrigley

I love David Shrigley – this book is really silly, and I honestly just picked it up from the library because the outside looks fun. It’s a quick read mostly made up of minimalist drawings – so if you want something not-too-serious that will make you laugh, I’d recommend.

Through a life, Tom Haugomat

I also grabbed this from the library because it looked pretty (oops). I absolutely love this illustrator (he’s worth following on Insta even if you don’t read this book). It’s a series of illustrations of a boy that wants to be an astronaut, and it’s one of the most astoundingly beautiful things I’ve read this year. There are no words, and I nearly cried at the end.

A Body Worth Defending, Ed Cohen

This book discusses the history/construction of autoimmunity, and how the idea of a body “attacking itself” is inherently biopolitical. As someone with an autoimmune disorder, I found this book fascinating, but it’s also really dense so I’d just recommend if you have a particular interest in autoimmunity.

The Hospital Suite, John Porcellini

Done by the author of King Cat, this graphic novel follows the protagonist through a series of different severe medical problems. I thought it was really well done and would recommend if you’re interested in art about chronic illness. 

Excuse Me, Liana Finck

I’m obsessed with everything Liana Finck does – if you don’t follow her on Instagram you should! – and this book was no exception. It’s very funny and poignant – if you like her cartoons, you’d definitely enjoy!

Ongoingness, Sarah Manguso

My friend recommended this to me a few years ago, and I recently reread. Sarah Manguso writes about her lifelong pursuit of keeping a hyper-meticulous diary, which fascinated me as someone who used to do this, too. It’s a very quick read and made me think more deeply about the desire to constantly record ones’ life as a protection against passing time. 

The Romance of Tristan, Beroul

This book is wild – I read it for a class. It’s a medieval book that doesn’t really make sense and I do not think you should read it unless you are also taking a class on Medieval Drugs.

Two Kinds of Decay, Sarah Manguso

Here, Manguso writes about her autoimmune blood disorder, and her suicidal depression, relating the experience of her first flare when she was in college. Big content warning for graphic depictions of hospitals/illness/needles etc., as well as depression. I found it interesting, but I cannot overstate how graphic and upsetting this book is.

Unfinished Business, Vivian Gornick

Absolutely one of the best books I read this year. I saw Vivian Gornick talk at Pomona and was floored. Here, Gornick writes about being a chronic-re reader, and discusses some of her favorite books and how her relationship changed with them throughout time. I found myself underlining everything, her prose is just so wonderful. I think everyone should read this. 

300 Arguments, Sarah Manguso 

I like Sarah Manguso, so I ordered this. It’s a set of interconnected aphorisms like “Bad art is from no one to no one.” Manguso is clearly brilliant and this book is very well written – it’s just a bit too minimalist for me. I would definitely recommend Ongoingness if you want to read something by her.

No one belongs here more than you, Miranda July

I am obsessed with this short story collection. Again, don’t think Miranda July is everyone’s cup of tea, but the stories were so viscerally weird in a way that really resonated with me.

Anti-Diet, Christy Harrison

I’ve listened to Christy Harrison’s podcast Food Psych for a while now, so was very excited when her book came out. The book focuses on (in Harrison’s words) “Reclaim[ing] your time, money, health, and happiness from our toxic diet culture.” As someone in ED recovery, this book/Harrison’s work in general have changed my life (which I do not say lightly!) – anyone who struggles with body image/their relationship with food should absolutely read this.

Women, Chloe Caldwell

I read this because a girl on Tinder told me too (lol) – it’s about a woman’s sexual awakening and relationship with this woman, Finn, who reminds me of a lot of hot women I follow on Tik Tok that wear suits and look mean. It takes a minute to get into. I overall enjoyed it, and was touched by the book at the end, but found a lot of the prose to be pretty clunky. So, would I recommend – I don’t know, maybe?

Romance or the End, Elaine Kahn

My friend recommended this book of poetry to me. Elaine Kahn is so talented and writes so beautifully – another book where I found myself underlining everything. Would definitely recommend!

How to Murder Your Life, Cat Marnell

Cat Marnell’s memoir recounts her struggles with bulimia and addiction while working as a beauty editor. I found it enthralling and hard to put down. I recommended it to a friend who had to put it down because it was too stressful. I think it’s a great book, but not for everyone. 

Rubyfruit Jungle, Rita Mae Brown

If the meaning of the title intrigues you, I would definitely recommend. This coming-of-age story follows Brown’s childhood, and relationships with women. I thought I liked Women by Chloe Caldwell until I read this book. Very gay, very good!!!! I could not put it down!

A Body Undone, Christina Crosby

In this memoir, Crosby writes about queerness/disability through the lens of her experience after a bicycle accident that left her paralyzed. If you want something gay with lots of theory, this book is for you! Fun fact: Crosby is the friend Nelson writes about in The Argonauts. As a heads up, though, the descriptions of pain can be pretty graphic/triggering. 

Delta of Venus, Anaïs Nin

I wanted to read something by Anaïs Nin and this is absolutely NOT what I should have read. Nin wrote this erotica for a man who didn’t like romance and wanted her to skip to the sex – the foreword is basically her ranting about the man who commissioned her to write this work. There’s a lot of (unsurprisingly) incest, as well as depictions of rape/assault. I do not recommend. 

Sick, Porochista Khakpour 

Sick is a memoir about Khakpour’s experience living with lyme disease, and her struggle to attain a diagnosis and proper treatment. I didn’t know anything about lyme, so found this book very enlightening. I’d add it to your list if you’re interested in memoirs of chronic illness.

Eros the Bittersweet, Anne Carson

I read this book because a character in the L Word talked about it (oops….). But wow, this is truly one of the best things I’ve ever read (thanks Marina!). Even Carson’s prose is breathtakingly poetic – she stitches together Sappho’s writing, Greek myths & critical theory so seamlessly. I felt like a different person when I finished.

Autobiography of Red, Anne Carson

I absolutely loved this book. Autobiography of Red is a love story between two men based on a Greek myth. It feels surprisingly epic, despite being a pretty short read. It feels a bit like the long-form-poem version of Song of Achilles. (If you read this book and enjoyed it, absolutely read Song of Achilles).

Norma Jean Baker of Troy, Anne Carson

I love Anne Carson, but I didn’t enjoy this book as much as the others. Maybe it’s because it’s a performance piece and I read it rather than watching it be performed, or maybe I just didn’t get it. 

Hunger, Roxanne Gay

In this memoir, Roxanne Gay writes about her rape (so content warning for that, as there are very graphic descriptions), and her relationship with her body. This is one of the most brutally honest books I’ve encountered about food, body image and eating disorders – Gay does not sanitize her self-blame and self-hatred – and it’s an important counternarrative to how fatness is commonly represented in the media. I would not recommend it if you’re in the depths of an ED or early on in ED recovery because it’s pretty triggering. I think it’s an important read, but I wouldn’t feel comfortable just telling anyone to read it off the bat.

Grief Sequence, Prageeta Sharma 

Prageeta Sharma is a Pomona professor who is wonderful, so I was very excited to read her book. Grief Sequence is an evocative, moving, and incredibly powerful story of Sharma losing her husband to cancer. It made me even more excited to work with her, and I would definitely recommend especially if you go to the 5cs!

The Undying, Anne Boyer

I’m not sure exactly what to call The Undying – maybe memoir, maybe autofiction? But Boyer combines narrative about her own experience with breast cancer with cultural criticism, drawing on both her experience as a poet and an essayist. This book was definitely one of my favorite works about illness I’ve read this year.

Illness as Metaphor, Susan Sontag

I found this book interesting, but not my favorite of what I’ve read about chronic illness. Sontag writes about how tuberculosis and cancer take on particular cultural symbolism – did you know that tuberculosis was associated with sexual desirability? I did not! Perhaps the piece wasn’t as interesting to me because people don’t tend to get tuberculosis anymore. If you’re particularly interested in TB/cancer, or if you’re writing your thesis about chronic illness I would read, but otherwise, not sure I I’d recommend.

Gut Feminism, Elizabeth A. Wilson

This book discusses depression through the lens of the gut, arguing for feminists to incorporate biological data into their analysis. It’s pretty dense, so I’d only recommend if depression, anti-depressants, and the politics of the gut are particularly interesting to you. But as someone interested in those things, great read!

Come as You Are, Emily Nagoski

Here, Nagoski discusses female sexuality and arousal in a way that made me realize I actually knew nothing about how female arousal works. For example, did you know wetness ≠ arousal? I didn’t! This book truly revolutionized how I think about sex/sexuality. The only caveat is that the book does center on the experiences of cis women (which the author does admit in a disclaimer at the beginning), so I hope that there are future works that touch on the same ideas in more inclusive ways. 

Practicalities, Marguerite Duras

I really like Marguerite Duras – The Lover is one of my favorite books – but this book didn’t really do it for me. Duras is brilliant, but parts of it felt a bit mundane/dated. A lot of people love this book, though, so I feel like it’s just me!

The Soft Life, Bridgette Talone

I made a goal for myself to read more poetry this year, since I usually read mostly prose. This is an example of the kind of poetry I struggle reading – l am less drawn to poetry that completely strays away from narrative – and this book was a bit too abstract for me. There’s beautiful imagery, it just felt like it went over my head. But it was recommended by a friend whose taste I greatly respect, so maybe it’s for you and just no for me!

Look at Me, Anita Brookner

This book took me a while to finish. Look at Me follows a librarian and aspiring novelist in her friendship with a glamorous couple. It’s very dry, witty, observant, and brilliantly satirical. I’m very glad I finished it, but it took a while to get pulled in.

The Cancer Diaries, Audre Lorde

Lorde writes about loving women, and her experience with breast cancer. It’s a collection of entries from her journal, combined with meditations on these entries. So, so very beautiful! Also very heartbreaking. This might be my favorite book I’ve read about illness. 

Zami, Audre Lorde 

Lorde’s wonderful coming-of-age novel covers her life growing up in New York, and her relationships with different women. It took me a bit to get into it, but once I did it was addictive to read. Certain scenes are just so breathtakingly vivid, and I don’t think I’ve read anyone who writes as well as Lorde about loving women. Also, she went to my high school, so that part was very wild to read – definitely recommend in particular to fellow Hunterites!

Fearing the Black Body, Sabrina Strings

I’ve wanted to read this book ever since listening to Strings on one of my favorite podcasts (FoodPsych). This book discusses the historical construction of thinness as an ideal tied to whiteness – it’s very well written and illuminating. I feel like the idealization of thinness is something that is often really tolerated and encouraged in liberal spaces (*cough* Claremont colleges *cough*), so definitely recommend. If you don’t have time for the book, I’d definitely suggest checking out the podcast episode!

Unbearable Lightness, Portia di Rossi

This memoir discusses di Rossi’s experience with anorexia/bulimia, and her relationship with her queerness. I read it in a day, I was so engrossed. However, I wouldn’t recommend to anyone in early stages of ED recovery, or in the thrust of an eating disorder. 

The Art of Cruelty, Maggie Nelson

If you have read other works by Maggie Nelson and enjoyed them, and are interested in literature about cruelty, I’d recommend! It’s more theoretical than her other works and it’s pretty dense – I’ll definitely have to read it again to fully ‘get’ it. But Nelson is such a brilliant cultural critic that it’s a pleasure to read anything she writes. Like “truth in art is but a feeling”?? Yes!! Go off!!

The Marriage Plot, Jeffrey Eugenides

This is definitely top five of the books I’ve read this year. I was floored when I was finished. It’s set at Brown, but so many of the descriptions of campus life really resonated and amused me. The end was heart-wrenching. The prose is so evocative. I loved it.

The Red Parts, Maggie Nelson

This book focuses on the trial for the brutal murder of Nelson’s aunt by a stranger – it’s very gruesome but enthralling. I couldn’t put it down.

Jazz, Toni Morrison

I listened to the audiobook which Toni Morrison reads, which is great. Jazz is set in Harlem in the 1920s, and though it’s pretty short, it’s incredibly vivid and haunting. It’s one of the most original and intriguing narratives I’ve encountered (not even including the beauty of the prose), and unlike anything else I’ve read.

The Virgin Suicides, Jeffrey Eugenides

I read this because I loved The Marriage Plot so much. I didn’t like this as much as I liked The Marriage Plot or Middlesex. After I finished, I thought I didn’t like it, and then I listened to this podcast called Sentimental Garbage and decided I did like it after all. I was frustrated throughout the book at how obtuse the women are, but after getting over my sadness that we never figured out why the girls killed themselves, I have more appreciation for Eugenides’ vision.

Motherless Brooklyn, Jonathan Lethem

Motherless Brooklyn is different from what I usually read – it’s the only detective novel on this list – but I loved it. It’s set in my neighborhood in Brooklyn, which is particularly exciting (and why my Dad is a big Lethem stan). It’s one of the most original books I’ve ever read, and the descriptions are astoundingly innovative and vivid. It’s also really funny! And he’s a Pomona professor! My mom is reading it too for the WNYC book club, which I believe you can still join if you want.

Pain Studies, Lisa Olstein

Another illness book! Olstein writes about her experience with migraines, and also theorizes about pain. I haven’t read any book exclusively focused on pain, so this was cool! It didn’t resonate with me as much as other stuff I’ve read, but still very good.

The Left Hand of Darkness, Ursula k. Le Guin

I was very excited for this book, which is a work of sci-fi written in 1969 about a world where everyone is gender-fluid and has no sexual prejudice. I didn’t enjoy it as much as I had expected to – perhaps because the main drama of the book is finding out whether this world is going to trade with another world, and I am just not very interested in trade. Sci-fi is also not really a genre I read often, so I wouldn’t do much with the fact that this book didn’t resonate.

Song of Achilles, Madeline Miller

I’ve cried maybe six times this year and finishing this book was one of them. It’s gay. It’s Greek. It’s epic. If you liked Percy Jackson and now, you’re part of the LGBTQ community you have to read it. This is the kind of book that made me worried it had ruined all other books. I think this is a perfect book, or at least the closest I can imagine.

Catalogue of Unabashed Gratitude, Ross Gay

This book is astoundingly beautiful. A friend recommended it and said it made his writing a lot happier - which was exactly what I needed! – and this description rings true. I definitely have more trouble reading poetry than prose but found this book very powerful and engaging. I read it in one sitting.

Coeur de Leon, Ariana Reines

Absolutely one of my favorite books of poetry! Coeur de Leon embodies the exact kind of poetry I really like – the language is accessible, it’s visceral, it has a narrative – and also made me feel seen. I feel like it’s also one of those books made for people that like to write, especially about love. Very much recommend.

On Earth, We’re Briefly Gorgeous, Ocean Vuong

It took me a while to get into this one, and I felt for a while that everything was too depressing to enjoy it. While I do definitely want to revisit in post-pandemic times, I still was deeply moved. Big content warning though for drug abuse, death, and probably some other stuff I’m forgetting.

[shitty-check-please-aus]

2020 Books Read So Far, Part 2

Prior post here

So it turns out that it’s really hard for me to actually read books when I’m stressed out about a once-in-a-century pandemic, so this list is a bit shorter than my February post. Factors include: no commute, so harder to focus on audiobooks, stress, the purchase of my Nintendo Switch and Animal Crossing. All ratings are completely subjective and basically just how much I enjoyed reading them.  

The Feather Thief, Kirk W. Johnson 4.5/5. This was a pick for my book club because we wanted to read about some kind of heist, and it delivered! It’s nonfiction, about this guy who stole a ton of really old and scientifically useful bird skins/feathers so he could recreate Victorian fishing flies, and also make a ton of money. Do you ever delight in reading about drama that in no way can ever impact you? You will enjoy the drama of the fly-tying community, which is a real thing with an illicit underworld that violates like a billion laws on poaching. Do you stay awake at night wondering what really happened to the paintings in the Isabella Stewart Gardner Museum heist? Enjoy reading about how they caught this asshole and figured out how he did it. 

Untamed, Glennon Doyle 2/5. The thing is, I think this would be a great book if I was a straight middle-aged woman going through some stuff in my marriage. But I bought it for my book club’s pride month read, thinking that it would be more about her marriage to the USWNT captain and less about her divorce with some asshole who cheated on her. Doyle also just hit on some sore spots for me (”why are so many queer people prejudiced against God and Jesus” ma’am, my atheism literally does not impact your life whatsoever and my issues with Christianity are between me and my therapist). 

She completely lost me when she described going into an airplane bathroom and straightening her hair and putting on a full face of makeup. I guarantee you that SOMEONE on this cross-country flight was sitting there, pissing themselves in their seat while she spent fifteen minutes minimum doing some glamming up. Why did she not wait to get to her destination airport? This should be a crime. I also hate when parents talk about personal shit their kids go through for profit. 

Her prose is also incredibly flowery, and I do not believe for half a second that anything presented in quotes was actually said verbatim. I also feel like if you’re going to name drop, don’t be coy about it. “My friend Liz came over” you mean Elizabeth Fucking Gilbert, author of Eat Pray Love, who like Doyle famously divorced her husband and married a woman? If you’re bragging about meeting Oprah you should go all the way in your name drops. 

tl;dr it’s a book that’s written for a straight audience, and I am not a straight audience. The cover design is excellent, though, I would definitely put it on a coffee table if I was styling a photoshoot. Probably wouldn’t have finished it without my book club as motivation. 

The Hand on the Wall, Maureen Johnson 5/5. This is the third book in a trilogy, and it wraps up the first two books wonderfully. Without getting too spoilery, the main mystery is like half Leopold and Loeb and half the Lindbergh baby. You can tell from every sentence how much Johnson loves mysteries, and knows how to craft compelling, complicated, sometimes annoying characters, It’s also so tantalizing to feel for a minute like we could solve some of these ice-cold cases in the real world. 

The Adventure Zone: Petals to the Metal, The McElroys and Carey Pietsch 5/5. Really fun read! I love graphic novels that really force me to look at the art, pay attention to details, and take my time reading. This is also a really fun adaptation of one of my favorite arcs in the podcast, and manages to either keep the same level of fun or even ramp it up consistently. I love Pietsch’s facial expressions, and the tiny easter eggs she’s hidden on almost every page. The choices they’ve made in adapting it from podcast to graphic novel are also very well-done. Some things work better in audio improv than they would in this form, and they’ve recognized that some changes can improve the story (it’s a graphic novel, we don’t have to be as tied to the three main players as we do when they’re doing the voices). 

Wires and Nerve, Marissa Meyer, Stephen Gilpin 4.5/5. This was also a fun, fast read! I love the Lunar Chronicles, so it’s interesting to see it as a graphic novel. The half point deduction is maybe unfair, because it comes from the characters not looking the way I pictured them in my head when I read them. It follows Iko, Cinder’s android friend, and has a lot of good questions about whether a robot/android can be a person (imo, they absolutely can). 

Wires and Nerve: Volume 2, Gone Rogue, Marissa Meyer, Stephen Gilpin 4.5/5. Again, fun, fast, exciting. Some parts made me actually gasp out loud, there are good twists, there’s romance, it’s overall highly recommended! We get to spend significant time with everyone from the main series, which is lovely. Like meeting up with old friends. 

[mautadite]

may book round up

24 books this month, a pretty good stack. even though i’m working from home i keep expecting work to swamp me and leave me with no reading time but... that hasn’t happened yet? so, good.

silver moon - catherine lundoff ⭐️⭐️⭐️ a paranormal novel about a small town in which certain women who reach the age of menopause find another change happening to their bodies. i.e. they become werewolves. i fucking adored this concept and there was f/f romance, but the execution and the writing was sadly pretty boring.

no-no boy - john okada ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️ post-wwii, following a young japanese american man who was just released from prison. called a no-no boy because like all other japanese men at the time, he was asked two questions: will you serve in the armed forces and swear loyalty to the us? he answered no to both questions and was detained. the novel follows him grappling with that decision after the war, looks into his friends, family life, race relations, and what it’s like living in a country that despises you. enjoyed it a lot.

the husband gambit - l.a. witt ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️ the kind of tropey romance nonsense that i live for. contemporary m/m slow burn fake marriage between a struggling actor, and the son of a famous hollywood producer. there were some meh parts (like, the plotting and the reasoning behind why they had to get fake married was like... are you SURE marriage is the best way to fix this) but i really liked it for the romance and the tropes.

drive your plow over the bones of the dead - olga tocarczuk ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️ contemporary polish mystery fiction, following an old woman living in a secluded community in the woods, when poachers and prominent hunters begin turning up dead. really interesting writing and format, and a really excellent protagonist. not sure how much i liked the actual mystery.

the babysitter - jack harbon ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️ quick and dirty m/m romance, a literature-loving babysitter falls for the divorced father of the kid he babysits. pretty fun.

zipper mouth - laurie weeks ⭐️⭐️⭐️ contemporary fiction that follows a queer, mentally ill woman as she hurdles through life, unrequited love, jobs, and lots of drugs. i enjoyed the themes when there was a coherent one, but i really didn’t gel with the style. i guess it was trying to be stream of consciousness, which i have read and enjoyed in the past. but this didn’t do it for me. interesting tho, and honestly, i just might not have been the audience for it.

spirits abroad - zen cho ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️ a PHENOMENAL collection of stories drawing inspiration from malaysian spirits, culture and folklore. absolutely loved it, fave read of the month for sure. loved the use of language and dialect, and the writing was simple and precise and wonderful. and there were some great f/f stories in here. 

a cat, a man and two women - junichiro tanizaki ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️ the setting: 1920s japan. the characters: lily, a fat tortoiseshell. shozo, her lazy, well-meaning, but ineffectual cat-dad. fukuko, his hot young former mistress, current wife. shinako, his strong-willed, slightly bitter ex-wife. the plot: shinako decides, HEY ACTUALLY FUCK YOU KEEP YOUR HOT WIFE BUT I WANT THE CAT. a great novella about loneliness and comeuppance and marriage. the best part was the cat lol.

the terracotta bride - zen cho ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️ really interesting novella about a young dead woman living in chinese hell. she’s married, and her husband has three wives. the first: estranged, conniving, distant. the second: herself, unwilling but resigned. the third: newly arrived, and made out of terracotta. very interesting novella, beautifully written, grim but hopeful, f/f romance on the side.

king and the dragonflies - kacen callender ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️ wonderful queer children/YA book about family, grief, racism, coming to know yourself and also accepting yourself. contemporary, but it almost FEELS like a fantasy/magical realism book. 

orphan number eight - kim alkemade ⭐️⭐️⭐️ a novel about an orphaned woman coming to terms with experiments done on her as a child, when she encounters the doctor who performed said experiments, dying in a nursing home. the writing in this was pretty so-so, did a lot of head-hopping which is my biggest pet peeve. i liked the concept, but the plot and the follow through were meh. loved that the main character was a lesbian though, and some of the writing was great.

firm hand - nora phoenix ⭐️⭐️ meh... not for me. m/m contemporary romance following a guy recovering from the car crash that killed his best friend, and his best friend’s son. it went some places that i’m just not up for, lol.

meet cute club - jack harbon ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️ REALLY adorable m/m romance, following a dorky, earnest romance novel lover, and the new cashier at his favourite book store. they end up trying to revive the main characters struggling book club, and falling in love along the way. very fun and sweet.

mrs. mix up - candice harper ⭐️⭐️ the concept sounded so so cute: an f/f romance about two librarians with similar last names that go to a library convention and the staff mistakenly thinks they’re married and book them into one room. but the writing and chemistry were lacklustre and it was extremely poorly edited. it’s a shame, i could have liked this.

mine - kim hartfield ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️ a sexy f/f romance that i liked a LOT, about a young woman who after a traumatic event in her life decides to quit her job and go volunteer on a farm in the middle of nowhere. she ends up falling for her sexy lesbian farmer boss. it got deep in some areas i wasn’t really expecting it to, though it was a tad... idk, preachy? and the conflict at the end was annoying. enjoyed it a bunch tho.

the hobbit - j.r.r. tolkien ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️ nth reread! i’ve been listening to this on audiobook around bedtime since like... march, i think, it’s just such a comfort read for me.

the knight and the necromancer 1-3 - a.h. lee ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️ a very solidly good fantasy m/m romance series, about a young prince and a necromancer in a war against an invading sorcerer. sorta enemies to lovers? the three books span their relationship and the war, and though it was only a few weeks in time, it didn’t feel insta-lovey at all. liked it a lot.

the fake game - kim hartfield ⭐️⭐️⭐️ contemporary f/f fake dating office romance! pretty cute; didn’t blow me away but i solidly liked most of it.

what the wind knows - amy harbon ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️ historical time travel romance centred around the aftermath of the ireland easter rising. i spend so much time reading solidly gay stuff that it’s so weird reading things where the existence of queer ppl isn’t even acknowledged lol. anyway this was pretty good, i liked it mostly for the historical facts and aspects, but the romance was pretty touching too.

the golem of mala lubovnya - kim fielding ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️ LOVELY m/m romance in a small jewish community between a newly created golem and a stonemason. lovely writing and atmosphere and characters. i had my nitpicks with the resolution but holy heck i’m so happy with this.

the electric heir - victoria lee ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️ the second part of a queer YA duo-logy that i started earlier this year, set in a future dystopian magic-riddled US, dealing with abuse and trauma and survivors. extremely difficult to read, almost unenjoyable at times (because god these kids go through so much) but very very good.

first everything - kim hartfield ⭐️⭐️ aha, possibly my last try with this author, though i liked the first book i read by her so much i might read one more! f/f romance between a journalist and a fictional first daughter (who’s also like, a domme, lol). the plot was fine but a lot of the character stuff and the shitty parent stuff really bothered me.

and that was may! for june i’ll... read lots of queer stuff, but i mean i do that every month. i also want to try to read less romance, more thriller and historical and just general contemporary? i feel like i say that all the time, but i’ll try. (though i did just get my first ever advanced reader copy from netgalley and it’s f/f romance, so... exciting!) currently reading the 7 deaths and evelyn hardcastle, a thriller. pretty okay so far.

[queerical]

I asked you maybe a year or two ago, I think??? If you had any reading recommendations for people who enjoy fantasy and want to read something else than Harry Potter... And you provided a VERY LONG and DETAILED list that I saved. Well, I'm trying to read more and finally got around to read a book on your list after buying it for 2euros in a German thrift shop. Thanks for making me read Anansi Boys, it was very interesting!! Do you have anything else you might recommend for now?? Thanks though!

yes, i remember that post, i had a lot of fun with it! unfortunately, although it has been well over a year since then, i haven’t been very good at reading; it’s mostly been fanfiction and queer erotica romance novels for me u.u that being said, i still stand by all the recommendations i made then and i do have a few more

BOOKS I’VE READ

Batwoman the 2011 Series (if you don’t have anything against DC comics this is a good run, there’s some good fantastical monsters and a team up with Wonder Woman; also Batwoman is a lesbian if you didn’t know)

Binti Trilogy by Nnedi Okorafor (this is recced on the other list but i actually finished the series last year and i MUST rec it again; the first book is good but the third one will blow you out of the water)

Blackbird by Sam Humphries (a very interesting urban fantasy; tbh i’m still not sure how i feel about it, but i really hope it’s not finished)

Descender by Jeff Lemire (sci fi comic, after a robotic apocalypse a young robot tries to find his human brother, GORGEOUS art, the sequel Ascender is currently underway)

Parasol Protectorate by Gail Carriger (admittedly i’ve only read the manga adaptation, but if the novels are anything like it, they deserve to be on this list; there are several queer characters and also various spin offs)

Passing Strange by Ellen Klages (historical magical realism with lesbians; there isn’t very much magic which is why it didn’t make the other list but it’s still worth reading)

The Prince and the Dressmaker by Jen Wang (graphic novel with a touching love story involving a GNC prince, no magic or anything but it’s still good)

Red, White & Royal Blue by Casey McQuistion (not fantasy but it was THE best book i read last year so i have to rec it. an amazing romance between the first son and prince of england, very cathartic in these trying times)

Scarlet and the White Wolf by Kirby Crow (if you aren’t bothered by large age gaps i do recommend this series. the last book hasn’t come out yet, but the worldbuilding is very fascinating and there are some sweet love scenes)

Selume Proferre by EE Ottoman (a queer wlw urban fantasy novella)

When I Arrived at the Castle by Emily Carroll (a short chilling lesbian tale with exquisite illustrations)

BOOKS I’M CURRENTLY READING OR HAVEN’T READ YET BUT LOOK FORWARD TO

Alice Isn’t Dead by Joseph Fink (i finally finished the podcast and can’t wait to start the novel. it’s a horror thriller with lesbians who live to the end)

Arravan Series by Shea Godfrey (a fantasy involving a woman arranged to marry a foreign prince but developing a secret romance with his queer sister instead; haven’t finished but oh boy the drama is ramping up)

Dragon Age: Tevinter Nights (so if you play dragon age apparantly this is the hot new book to read; from the excerpts i’ve seen i’m quite excited)

The Drowning Eyes by Emily Foster (another queer fantasy novella)

Every Heart a Doorway by Seanan McGuire (what happens when children who go through portals to fantasy worlds come back to our own; tbh any book by McGuire is a good place to start)

It Devours! by Joseph Fink and Jeffrey Cranor (i read and loved the WtNV novel so i’m really excited for this)

The Monster of Elendhaven by Jennifer Giesbrecht (a fantasy horror novella; not far in yet but i love the writing style and the character introductions)

King of Scars by Leigh Bardugo (i recced the Six of Crows duology on the other list; i loved that and i have a feeling i’ll love this)

On a Sunbeam by Tillie Walden (sci fi graphic novel; listen i really fucking love Tillie Walden and you should to)

The Saddlebag by Bahiyyih Nakhjavani (so i found this book in a tiny used book store in idaho and it is quite intriguing, if you happen upon your own copy, i’d be interested to know what you think)

The Sorcerer of the Wildeeps by Kai Ashante Wilson (i recced A Taste of Honey on the other list; seriously just any book by him)

Tensorate Series by J.Y. Yang (non-western fantasy with non-binary characters)

Wayfarers Series by Becky Chambers (i realize sci fi isn’t fantasy but my friend has been bugging me to read this so it’s on the list)

Who Fears Death by Nnedi Okorafor (i just really love her work okay)

The Witcher by Andrzej Sapkowski (idk if you saw the netflix show, but i did and now i’m reading the books; so far i’m enjoying them)

hopefully this is enough to sate you. i’m thrilled to hear that you read and loved Anansi Boys!! i’m trying to read more myself and meet that goodreads challenge lmao. be sure to let me know if you read any more of the books on either of these lists! i’d love to talk about them!