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#like if theres too many people we care about about to die to die in the same situation it would be overwhelming not in a good way
trans-estinien · 6 months
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i love being autistic cause sometimes i get a glimpse into how regular people perceive things and its like. what the fuck. what the fuck is that? you live like this? and its normal?? i think YOURE the weird one actually. im fine. thanks though.
#THERES SO MANY WEIRD RULES#LIKE WHAT DO YOU MEAN PEOPLE PAY ATTENTION TO HOW SOMEONE WALKS LIKE HUH????? WHY????????????#can someone fucking explain the dude head nod thing to me why do we do that. whats that about. ive never seen anyone do that irl before#is that an american thing or do i just hang around too many afab people#i am learning the intricacies of cis people gender rules and i am. what fucking planet have i been on the last 17 years like what is this#was there some like. rulebook they handed out at somepoint they forgot to give to me or something#“best way to learn is to observe the men around you” OBSERVE WHAT. YOU PEOPLE PAY THAT MUCH ATTENTION TO EVERY LITTLE MOVEMENT????#bruh i can barely make eye contact w people...#my ass has never intentionally copied someones mannerisms ever.#i do it subconsciously. but doing it actively feels weird and wrong and like im breaking someones boundaries#“men dont smile at people.” well they should.#ive decided cishet men are the most boring people on the planet#“dont move with your hands” YOURE BREAKING MY POOR THEATER KID HEART#i need to meet more gay men irl to absorb the vibe of cause i only know like two. not counting myself#i want people to look at me and go. ah yes. fruit.#at this point im just going to accept being misgendered for the rest of eternity. id rather die than be boring in the way cishet men are#my flavor of being trans is so influenced by my autism cause my perception of genders is completely off from what everyone else is doing#im like. yeah i want to be a man. and then i look at what the majority of men are actually like and its like. wait no. not like that#shoutout to flamboyant gay men where would i be without them#i think the thing that bothers me the most is that like#in my mind peoples genders are just. the way they express themselves.#its not like. this super big complex deal like how everyone else treats it. if that makes sense? like.#regular people have so many rules for what counts as a man or what counts as a woman or what counts as neither and its like???#you can do what you want???? why do we care????#and ive been doing this since i was little. on account of the autism#i just. dont get why its such a big deal to people.#i cant wrap my head around it at all#not nonbinary not a girl not aegender not a man but a secret fourth thing#(man but i do it my way instead of everyone elses way)#unfortunately doing it my way just. leads to the misgendering dimension. for some reason
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lover-of-mine · 9 months
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are in you mind ?! lmao because I did though for a moment imagine is Eddie , like Eddie goes missing finding a kid because we know that's his kryptonite , buck goes ballistic finds him alone gets the kid to safety but when he is trying to get Eddie something happens the boat shift and boom buck drowns Eddie jumps in saves him and that jam we want of the desperate cpr , and also we have another fuel for tension because initially Eddie doesn’t realize the reason he didn’t get trapped underwater was because of buck maybe he had a concussion or simple in the chaos didn’t notice but he founds out that buck basically sacrifice himself and oh boy the conflict we could have there would be delicious
Babe, we're completely in sync here kspakapakakaoak I was actually thinking something along those lines but with Buck ending up trapped being about the damage to his lungs over the lightning? Like, he loses his footing because it's hard to breathe and he ends up getting dragged down and then Eddie goes ballistic until he realizes he's the reason it happened and he wasn't paying enough attention to prevent it. The conflict that could go on there?? The things that could be brought up?? The fight they could have over it?? Ugh, it could be DELICIOUS!!!?
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unmaskingdisability · 2 months
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A rock was thrown through the window of our local trans resources office.
My trans and Disability Group was attacked by a dozen troll accounts last week talking about how trans people are into beastiality and child porn.
Troubleshooting, a coworker told me "if these are the worst things that happen this year we'll be getting off lucky"
I know he's right. And the fact that that's true terrifies me.
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cal-writes · 1 month
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I thought about Zoro, again. And how he stays calm when all other mugivaras are in disarray. How he has to be the last pilar standing, because if not him than noone. And how some people deam him emotionless and uncaring because of that, because he keeps his cool and talk logic in hard situations. (Like whan they had to leave Vivi behind, or all this mess in inies loby). And I thought how I want someone to see it, and hug him and let him be vulnerable for a bit.
I dunno if I mean it like a prompt, or just want to cry with someone over Zoro. Maybe both. Anyway I would love to hear your thoughts on the matter in any format :')
god yes i knooooow. going insane over him tbh. like i went into this in my previous meta post about him, esp in enis lobby/water seven arc where he is so clearly affected by everything going on but can't show it. (or feels like he cant)
this reminded me of a thing i havent seen many people talk about, which is that zoro is very often 100% spot on with his predictions, gets ignored, and eats shit for it.
like zoro isnt stupid (despite what some characters and parts of the fandom think) hes incredibly perceptive and his cold read on most people will be accurate. theres several moments where he will predice something happening, rationally explains it to the crew how the best course of action is one thing and then luffy being stubborn and the protagonis does what he wants
not to say that thats a bad thing! i think its awesome to show their dynamic
like back on zou when they find out sanji left to marry big moms daughter and everyone wants to go and get him back
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zoro is harsh in his wording bc he always is but the core of the matter is this: if they go mess with big mom, while they are already anatagonizing kaido, they'll end up having to deal with two emperors. he understands that sanji knew that which is why sanji left the way he did (partially).
and we all know how that ended
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not only that i think this fight is a fantastic display of zoro's core character trait. unlike the three captains in this fight, he doesnt have an ego about it. he's not posturing or peacocking, he knows immediately shits gonna go down (killer too probably but with the mask its harder to tell what killer is thinking) and he's the one person that keeps an overview of the battlefield that includes everyone. law eventually does once he gets over his control issues
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and of course thats not the end of it in wano
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"ill suffer twice as much after" and he doesnt care, beats king, nearly dies or maybe does die and nobody knows about that whole thing
then of course in more recent chapters (spoilers for egghead below)
we have his fight against lucci which i find striking in how the other characters perceive it
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like jimbei can be excused, he doesnt know zoro all that long but the crew acts like this is a point of pride to zoro, to finish the fight. when we've seen zoro run away from fights plenty of times. and to me what he doesnt get to say is exaclty what ends up happening
if lucci isnt taken out, he will tell the elders about the plans he was privy to in eggheads lab. which of course he does when zoro is dragged away
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if the vegapunk hadn't stepped in
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zoro would have fought the elder and most likely lost
same way he knew he'd not be able to win against kuma
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he's telling everyone to stay out of it because he wants to protect them. its not an ego thing for him. he knows the second he stepped up to that fight hes probably going to lose. he's going to do his best to win but he's not delusional
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and i find it noteworthy that we are continuing this plot line of the crew not understanding zoro or not trusting him and not to mention this
lucci telling zoro he's dead weight
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and a little bit later, sanji telling him the same thing
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like, thats not their usual banter. this doesnt make zoro angry to like be able to fight off lucci better or sth. the panel of him standing there just, flinching honestly haunts me. (i eat it up oda please do somehting with it)
esp curious paired with my above example where i think zoro understands sanji quite well where i dont think sanji does in return. (another reason why i cant see them romantically im sorry itd require so much legwork for me to make that work)
i think it can definitely be read as a setup of zoro feeling apart from the crew. i think part of that is just due to the nature of his position as first mate in everything but name. like in a literal sense he is their superior the same way luffy is all of theirs. and we know from the usopp argument that he takes that a lot more seriously than the others. so i dont think - at this point in canon - zoro would open up to anyone except maybe luffy but even then thats not really the kind of relationship they have - and i dont think any of them actually see whats going on or what zoro has been doing basically the entire time.
zoro hasn't been vulnerable since his fight with mihawk
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timeywobblyshit · 3 months
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one thing that will forever piss me off is the way people talk about indian workers. there have 500 deaths confirmed due to heatstroke in a country which never counts heatstroke deaths. i imagine the actual number is in the thousands. minimum temps in the northern plains dont go below 35°c. humidity is high, and people are dying on the street, dropping like flies that the sahabs sitting in AC swat off their table. there is nothing for indian workers, no respite, no help coming. this is bad enough, but then i see people (usamericans and brits and funnily enough a ton of brazilians) making fun of them for dying. "we should nuke them" "dirty people anyway" "they have too many, whats a few less". verbatim sentences uttered by "communists" with tens of thousands of followers. (shit munchers is a new insult btw, thought we were curry munchers)
theres just no help coming. im lucky i teach in bangalore, where the weather is pleasant enough for now. i cant imagine how many people are suffering in the plains and in the shivaliks. one of the most densely populated regions of the world, and their own government wants them to die. i have colleagues that have barely survived the elections. the value of life in this country if youre poor or lower caste is nothing, not to the uc masters or not to the foreign communist. we die without a war, without a murmur, without a care. all we get in response are silence and jokes. i know for a fact that when i die ill be thought of by no one. my lifes value is 0. im a transwoman in this country. no transperson survives memory death. my wish was that some of my friends would. but apparently not
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ganondoodle · 6 months
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you know, i had a totk thought (uh oh)
soemthign thats really bothering me about the whole "actually, ganondorf didnt like the guy appearing out of nowhere marrying a hylian and just saying yep das our kingdom now and we can mine it barren under your nose and also i got laserbeam pebbles that i totally wont ever use on anyone come join me or die just bc of all of that but mainly bc the guy brought some weird tech with him that he dont like" - thing is that ......... we see almost not a single tech thing in the past (and for that matter see nothing of the oh so perfect and peaceful paradise hyrule was before big evil desert man didnt want to join our paradise- like what is the point about making the whole point of the game be -we need to restore hyrule to this paradise it once was- when you dont even see it or get to care about anything of it)
it might sound like a weird hangup but no really, the most we see is like two servant constructs, thats it, when they 'prepare for war' im pretty sure all you see is some lightly dressed ( ... is it just me or does their whole get up look alot like native american/other indingenous people too ... i still dont know how to feel about that- kinda adjacent to some of the sonau armor, the battery one i think??, also having that look...) hylians with spears, where the heck is all that tech?? is it implied to be all down in the mines hollowing out the underground (for no real reason either bc .... theres only two sonau left and no one else seems to want use nor need the tech otherwise there should have been more traces or soemthing left of it -unless it all just magically appeared out of nowhere in mostly prime condition while all shiekah tech jsut vaporized for bs non reasons just for it to be in tha game but oh dont you see its always been there lmao- so whats the point really????)
or up in the sky as most battle constructs are and they cant get them down in time bc *gestures vaguely*
or is it intentionally kept out of view bc idk seeing an army of robots on raurus side he can send out on a whim might not make him look as oh so good and perfect as they want him to look when he already got laserbeam pebbles (most of which hes been hoarding until ONE falls into hands not under his control) ?? like it just ... feels weird?? so many battle constructs that can even be a threat to link are jsut fully functioning strolling around in the present still, why wouldnt you want to use any of them to battle gan and if they DID why wouldnt you show that (no the 3 second unicorn cutscene doesnt count bc its just .. gan and his monsters isnt it) ?? (also ... why isnt there a big like battle ground , like fine you dont have to animate an army of monsters and robots clashing but... wouldnt it be cool to have you discover a giant flat plain in the underground (that magically got put under ground like gan just decided to stroll down there to get sealed lol) and its the only mostly empty field in the game littered with thousands of monster bones and dead constructs intermingled?? just to give it all a bit of weight?? evidence that it happened?? cool ass discovery????)
(also also i cannot let go of ganondorf apparently being sooooo anti tech but then clamgan uses the shiekah stuff??? shouldnt he also be against that then or is that suddendly fine bc- oh woops sorry, forgot clamgan is actually just something, not connected to gan at all actually, i mean why else would miasma turn into malice only to turn into miasma again haha none of that is connected actually what is a calamity anyway? also im sorry to bring this up again but i just cannot let go of the ppl in the present being so obsessed with using sonau tech in every part of their life now- they just lived through an apocalypse of a barely understood strange tech but CLEARLY this other even less understood strang tech is not dangerous at all lets make CARS OUT OF IT and what theres no danger in miasma and that tech existing at the same time LIKE SOMETHING ELSE BEFORE THAT IDK SEEMS LIKE A BAD COMBO--- oh sorry forgot that ceased to exist in both the world and peoples minds for *gestures vaguely* plot reasons- why why why are monsters mining the sonanium?? they dont even work with the yiga no that is also completely disconnected we dont wanna draw and interesting connections after all- whats the point if it means nothing but to be a loot box for the player-- actually, so much of totk is just a so built around throwing you into a box of toys with no substance to it- listen i know games are kinda like toys but if it doesnt make sense and offers you nothing interesting to think about even slightly whAT IS THE POINT)
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berylcups · 4 months
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PT 2-How La Squadra react to you calling them their nickname/term of endearment:
CW: mentions of polyamory and queer relationship discrimination
Notes: Here's part 2! This was actually pretty fun! If anyone has similar HCs/reacts they would like please send them in! It was refreshing to do something fluffy-ish rather than just lewd for once! I’m still working on Sorbet and Gelatos personalities so I hope they don’t seem too generic or stereotypical, but theres not much of them to work off of…other than them screaming and dying. Yikes. But I hope you all enjoy! 💜Beryl
Risotto: “Rissi, I’m heading to the grocery store.” You announced turning the knob to his office. “ is there anything special you want for dinner tonig-oh shit” you saw he wasn’t alone. Prosciutto and Pesci were in the room with him talking about some target.
“I’m so sorry- I didn’t know you were busy- I’ll come back later.”
Prosciutto cleared his throat upon hearing that cutesy name and Pesci looked away trying to hide his blush.
“We can touch base on further details later. This should be enough to get started with.” He dismissed them, acting unaffected by the name.
They promptly took their leave, just leaving you and your beloved leader alone.
“I’m so sorry, Risotto. I didn’t know you were busy. I should’ve known bette-“ you stuttered worried you embarrassed him.
“It’s fine.” He cut you off. “It’s just the guys. They know better than to mess with me about the names you call me.” He chuckled. 
“Although for future reference…” he started looking up at you with a serious expression. “This might be a habit you should break. If any of our enemies know we are connected, they might try to harm you and I just couldn’t live with myself knowing I caused your demise.” He said. “I already lost one too many people dear to me.”
You walked over to him by the desk and gave him a huge hug. “I’m not going anywhere. I promise you that.” He hugged back and gave you a soft kiss on the shell of your ear. 
“Good. Because the day you die is the day I die. I love you Angelo/a.” He sighed in relief. 
This big guy has to be stoic 24/7 so in front of others he’s going to keep things professional. As far as he cares in front of the guys you can call him all the names you want but he isn’t going to acknowledge them 😂 call him zaddy and he’ll just continue talking about what mission is next… or if you’re overdoing it he’ll give you a warning “ok, that’s enough.” type of look. 
Of course in private he’ll call you pet names but… he’s not very creative but he’s dramatic so he’ll call you the vita mia, cuore mio, caro/a, and angelo/a. 
Prosciutto: “Prosci I’m back! The mission was a success! It’s all thanks to you that I’m able to work by myself now!” You said happily as you came through the door. 
“Prosci??? Pfft” formaggio snickered. 
A few of the others were snickering or trying to hold back a smile. Prosciutto put an end to this quickly with a deadly glare. 
“Really? That’s wonderful news Y/N. I’m very proud of you.” He said as he guided you to somewhere a little more private.
“Y/N… I love you with all my heart but remember what we agreed upon?” He asked. “We must keep our affections private.”
“Oh, I’m sorry, Prosciutto. I must have really embarrassed you.” You said dejectedly looking away from him.
“No. Never.” He said firmly as he gently lifted your face to meet his. He gently bumped his forehead up against yours. 
“You are my beloved partner and I love you no matter what. But in this world we must remain distant in front of others so I can protect you.” He explained gently caressing your face . 
“Also… we have to set a good example for Pesci. He may be a mammoni but he has so much potential and it’s up to us to help him unlock it. Understand?”
“Understand.” You said with a small smile.
“That’s my good angelo/a.” He smiled back and kissed you on the forehead. 
He’s not very affectionate in public but he is chivalrous. He’ll open the door for you, pour your wine, take your jacket, etc… 
In private he’ll call you his favorite pet names with a kiss on the cheek.
He’ll use the classic names like Tesoro, Caro/a, Bambino/a, or calls you his angelo/a. 😇
Sorbet & Gelato:  “Sorby Gelly I’m upset!” You whined.
“Aww what’s wrong lil sundae?” Asked Gelato.
“You know the drill-come sit down and tell us what’s wrong.” Added Sorbet patting Gelatos lap.
You moped over and somehow found your spot in the dog pile of legs and laps on the chair.
“You know Valentines is next month and I saw this cool fancy spa I wanted us to go to-“ you started with putting the magazine page in their faces. “Seeee??? But they are all TwO pEoPlE oNlY!!! This is unfair! They act like the entire world is monogamous and straight! Bullshit!” you complained.
“Oh, that does look nice. I could use a massage, my back has been killing me lately.” Sorbet read through the page.
“Mud baths and facials too? I’m in.” Gelato looked at the pictures.
“But what about the restrictions?” you asked.
“Oh Y/N. Do you have any idea who you’re in a relationship with? We’ll get you that perfect valentine's day, whether they want to serve 3 people or not.” Gelato cooed, patting your head to comfort you.
“Of course they’ll take care of us…if they wanna live that is.” Sorbet added rubbing your back. “Or we could show them our knife collection instead. Their choice.”
“Yay~! I can’t wait! I’ll be sure to add a reminder to my calendar to make a reservation for later.” you said gleefully.
“Anything to keep our little sundae happy~.” they both said in unison and kissed you on both sides of your cheeks.
“...” Illuso gulped trying to hold back the bile rising in his throat. The PDA is just overwhelming!
The other men in the room wanted to throw up from the mushiness. It's gotten worse ever since they added you into their relationship but they know better than to say anything after Illuso made fun of you three and ended up with a knife in his thigh. 
Sorbet and Gelato are the kings of PDA! They are always cuddled up on one another and now you’re included on the love fest. They are gonna sit on your lap, you're gonna sit in their lap, you're gonna sit on one's lap while the other sits on your lap, etc. And they’re generous with the pet names as well!
They both like names that match up with their names, so you get named after frozen treats like Sundae, Granita, Sherbet, Snowcone…along with the typical names like caro/a, tersoro, and amore too. They have a long list of names to call you, so it doesn’t simply end there!
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novembermorgon · 5 months
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hihi not sure how fond myrielle and aerion are of each other (would love to know more about their dynamic if you are willing to share <3) but they remind me of the “who tf is burning down my kitchen” “making breakfast for my beautiful wife” twitter meme
anon ... i giggled .
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as for marriage dynamics well .. i feel like by default any relationship with a guy everyone hates for good reason is going to be a bit strained . but somehow they're both kind of deranged enough to make it work (er.. well... somewhat...).
ive talked very briefly about it in my little myrielle post already but it kind of had to grow into anything beyond hating each other . right when myrielle gets to court she holds a lot of resentment toward him, mainly because he's the second son of a fourth son - not really heir to anything, and even when she's young she wants to aim higher than that with her betrothal. she spends a lot of time pining after the concept of another man that she deems 'better' (valarr, matarys, even daeron etc - the actual people matter less than the fact that they're further up in the succession than aerion) just because she's decided to herself that she deserves more. a little girl playing into the idea of being a wife and centering her whole worldview about that ala really twisted westerosi expectations and societal structures
it's kind of what you'd expect from two very willful very spoiled preteens; a lot of petty squabbles and little disagreements that have them bickering and squabbling and it's a bit of a mess . in time though it breezes over kind of because they both grow up and 'mature' in the sense that they aren't calling each other stupid and pushing each other over in the yard anymore LOL
by the time they're married ... well . it's .... . myrielle is fond of him and finds him handsome and dashing while they're in public and in private he at least treats her well a couple days a week which is enough . i think it's very shallow in the sense that ... i'm not sure if they ever truly know each other fully . myrielle projects her ambitions onto him and steadily heads down her path to making sure he becomes king (after the tourney at ashford meadow and the great spring sickness when things get a little crazy in how many targs are dying off) and aerion projects some idea of the wife he'd imagined himself to want onto her . in my mind he's kind of giving targ man too caught up in the idea of his ancestry and his family traditions given his whole deal with the dragon delusions etc so its lots of hey what if you pretend like you're (targ woman of his choosing) and ill be (her evil husband) and then we'll be a Proper Couple instead of a Fake Arrangement between me (perfect prince) and a lesser non-targ woman . you can see that there might be some issues here .
definitely not good . they hold resentment for each other mutually for a variety of reasons but theres also some deep seated dedication there especially from myrielle . she gets so deep into the thought of the both of them rising further than they're expected to that she in turn essentially drops everything for him and makes a lot of questionable choices and does a lot of questionable things to keep him happy and to assist him in whatever way she thinks he needs . i feel like she gets very caught up in the idea of really feeding into the idea aerion has of their marriage . tries to play into the thought of being more of a targaryen and tries to shift and change herself which never really works because she does treasure her own family and her identity but also because things just don't go the way she wants .
errr. ride or die i guess but it's weirrddddddd . which is funny to say because in practice they both cheat on each other and lie to each other and fight and bicker but they keep going back for more . why...? well.. maybe duty maybe genuine care maybe a third more evil option. me when i go out and cheat on my wife but its okay because i come back and bring her nice gifts and we do our historical targ roleplay which isn't weird at all guys i promise please guys listen its not weird its not w
rubs my chin. a lot of thoughts but i'm bad at putting them into words. i hope this is anything . probably not. one day you'll get something better from me .... .... <3
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doyouevenshipbr0 · 16 days
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borderline illiterate gruvia think piece.
happy gruvia day i guess!
so like…… im a grown woman. so believe me when i say at this point i rly couldnt care to be genuinely bothered by antis. like i will literally just block them lmao. ok yes i did write a whole fic revolving around a comment by an anti KFHDKSJWJEDK but i rly wasnt mad i was just genuinely inspired by what they said.
ANYWAYS! nonsensical 294820381002 word rant incoming from the “unbothered” grown woman.
seeing people say how gray is out of character in 100 yq/has stockholm syndrome are literally missing the entireeeee point of his and juvia’s relationship and its crazy!!
*side note, i think for the sake of helping gray’s character and development, they sacrificed a lot of cool things about juvia and a lot of her individuality which i do not like. but thats a rant for another time. btw do notttt even come for me bc she is literally still by far my fav character lmao*
im probably gonna go on for too long about this but gray’s whole fucking character throughout the whole story from beginning to end is centered around the fact that hes cold and closed off and grumpy and “too cool” and listen im not saying this is fucking rocket science or any type of transcendent literature by any means but i HAVE to point out that hes a fucking ice wizard. like. duh. im sure his character/personality was meant to go along with abilities i mean look at literally EVERYONE else in fairy tail.
ANYWAYS the reason he is this way is because he’s so used to losing all of the people he loves and even worse, hes used to so many people sacrificing themselves for him.
and it traumatizes him!! so many people hes been close to have died and he ultimately always thinks its his fault! lord knows im rusty with ft knowledge but his parents died (cant remember if it was in any type of sacrificial way teehee), Ur sacrifices herself for gray, ultear sacrifices herself for gray, and his dad dies AGAIN (once again, not sure if this was in a sacrificial manner lmao. i kindaaa think it was? maybe? shrug.). but POINT IS! theres a common theme of loved ones dying and/or sacrificing themselves for him. there might even be more people lmao idfk.
so what happens when he meets a girl who has an overwhelming and unwavering and infinite love for him?! he is freaked the fuck out!!! for a couple reasons! 1. he is so used to losing the people that love him and 2. he doesn’t even think hes deserving of any love to this degree!
then what happens? he PUSHES HER AWAY! KEEPS HER AT A DISTANCE!!!! because THATS ALL HE KNOWS!!!!!!!!! yes he has his friends who love him but no one has ever loved him in the way and abundance that JUVIA DOES! so he has to react appropriately! lots of love = lots of keeping her at an arms length!
so when he thinks he loses juvia in their fight with invel, and she comes back, dont we think it would make sense that he finally realizes he should accept his feelings for her? i mean remember when he said he promised her an answer AFTER the war? once again, like gray, pushing things off. and then he almost LOSES HER without ever telling her how he feels! so gray realizes life is short! theres no use in trying to deny ur feelings! these are common themes in like 85% of my gruvia drabbles lmao.
im not even saying that it was love at first sight for him and that gray liked her from the jump. bc i dont think thats true. i think we can finally see outward romantic feelings for juvia right after the tartaros arc, when juvia visits gray at his parents’ grave. but before that, i think juvia was a friend (wellll i feel like after the tenrou island arc he liked her more than a friend, but he didnt really realize how much more) who he cared about, and truly didnt know what to make of her because like i said, hes never known a person to love him so much and actually not die LMAO.
but my point is, juvia is the perfect person to be gray’s romantic partner. she is a person so full of love and so happy to love and she doesnt care who knows it. she is unequivocally herself and she wears her heart on her sleeve to the upmost extent.
it literally only makes sense for his character to end up with her!
u could argue gray doesnt need to end up with anyone at all bc he has his friendsssss and likeeee. sureee. fine. but what fun is that? i personally want to see the scared-of-love grump to find his person. i think, again, thats kind of the point of gray’s character- learning u are worthy of love, accepting love, and learning to love openly.
im sorry but literally what better happy ending for him than to be with juvia?
so fast forward to 100 yq, where he is just sooooo out of character apparently. dont we think that may actually be…. character development?
the boy who probably couldn’t even fathom a romantic relationship is now finally accepting he’s in love. he’s done pushing it off, he’s done denying, he’s done depriving himself of feeling love. thats a step in the right direction! now what? in true gray fashion, he thinks hes still not good enough! and that’s where we are now. he’s not confident, he thinks he’s weak, and he thinks he cant protect her. why? he knows she loves him. he knows he’s objectively a strong wizard. so why does he feel inadequate? CIRCLE BACK!!! TO WHO GRAY IS AS A PERSON!!!! SINCE DAY ONE!!! constantly in fear of losing his loved ones! thinking he can’t protect them! SCARED TO LOVE!
like im sorry the proof is soooo in the pudding and i totally understand if gruvia isn’t ur cup of tea but to say things arent making sense is silly to me! they actually make perfect sense!
and yknow what. im gonna go from a romantic standpoint to a realist standpoint. years ago, mashima said he likes gray and juvias dynamic and didnt have anything serious in mind for them anytime soon. so he kept that going for literally the entire series. well. he ended fairy tail alluding to the fact that gray and juvia were kinda together at that point. or he at least ended it with the pretty obvious conclusion that gray does in fact have feelings for juvia. so then when ft 100 yq starts what was he supposed to do? act like all of their development in the last arc never happened? that would be kinda hard to do!
whatever i just hope at least like 3 of these sentences were coherent lmao u guys get my point
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koszmarnybudyn · 7 months
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Here's a long poem about the teens, and growing up and about a lot of things, its called "You have to kill god"
You and your besties need to kill god, maybe you were always destined to, fate is such a picky woman after all, you didnt ask for it, there should have been better options, maybe there were, older, stronger wiser, but there all useless now. You didn't want to kill god, not untill you were in highschool, not untill you saw the incocent die, not untill you saw the ones in power as corrupt, your kindegarden teacher smiled so wide as those kids grew up much faster than they should, oh so wide, you did too you think, the clothes from a few weeks ago dont fit anymore, the photos on the walls feel fake, you shouldnt look so young, it doesnt feel like you, but it is, youve changed, it hurts, and isnt that the thing that comes for us all, after all youve seen death, you know heaven and you know hell and you know they are both shells of what they told you, both run by incompetent assholes, so you have to kill god, there is no debate. The mayor died, i guess nurture failed after all, youve been destined to be what you are, and what you are is nothing, the blood you have has always dragged you here, the first hands to hold you were the ones to burn those marks into your soul, do you have a soul? You share one, so you must, but maybe you dont maybe you are as hollow as you feel, he didn't, do you even remember him? You never did. hes back, he is going to die, he said he loved you, you dont think he lied, but youve been wrong about many things. You know this one, you have to kill god, he never hugged you enough, he wasnt there enough, will you be the same? Will your hands also hurt more than they create, will the act of creation be something worse than that of destroying. Will your children ever forgive you, will you love them enough? You were never enough, they never liked you, you now know there is a diffrence. It hurts, it always hurts. You have to kill god, they were suppose to do it, they failed, they always fail, dont you always fail as well? You tried so so hard, you studied, you learned you listened, it wasnt enough, its stupid, its like soooo stupid, you shouldnt care, youre cool like that, you still care. You always cared, more than you should have. You have to kill god, hes stupid, he tried to be like you, well he pretended to be, you belived him, you freed him, he lied. They voted for him, he was beloved, your mom loves him, your dad loves him, you never got the hype, maybe you tried it, they spoke so highly of him, in his nice suit and with his firm handshake, with his perfect smile, he nearly got you and your friends arrested, he nearly got you killed, he made the public hate you, you were never safe, were you ever safe? Is anyone ever safe? You dont know, you wish you did, you wish for so many things. That's youth isnt it, being foolish and dumb and trusting people you shouldnt, maybe all adults suck, maybe they all want to see you fail so they can scream about your generation as you crawl up clifs they made by destroying bridges their parents built. Maybe all life is a battle, you were too young to know anything else, they were always fighting, they didnt rest they sacrificed everything, you should be greatful why arent you greatful!! You are so disrespectful!!
...Why dont we talk anymore? You used to be so small, and life was simple, and now with the strechmarks and the too short tshirts came the difficult, there came the power the independance, the knowledge, but you still know nothing, how can you be so dumb. You used to be soooo smart, maybe the world got dumber, the adults seem to, they dont get it, you have to kill god and then theres homework and the extracuricullums and well you gotta sleep sometime so no sorry can't hang out schedules pretty tight sorry guys maybe next month. You know they didnt require seatbellts in cars once? The world got safer, simpler, so why arent you? Why are you still fighting, you should be at the club, sonics maybe, sneaking alcohol into parties, trying vaping, dancing to shitty pop songs, but you arent, you maybe never will, will you even go back to highschool, its probablly ash now, rubble maybe, youve been absent for months, dad talkes about going to sleepovers, the one you did ended in a double kiddnapping. You dont know what youll do in the future, will you have a future? After you kill god maybe, youll go to school, collage, get a job act like everythings normal, carry on, smile, act like the scars you have are from fireworks or dumb accidents, not enemies and spells. You have to kill god, you dont know how, youll have to figure it out, yoy always do, they never gave instuctions for this stuff. You have to kill god, and maybe its not alright, and maybe it never will, but you are trying and you are here with your besties so maybe you can do it, this once.
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modtheartifex · 2 months
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i wrote this into a youtube comment like moments ago, but i feel strongly enough that i will put it out here as well;
Lego Monkie Kid Season 5 does NOT have villains. it has characters that are antagonistic forces and layered with nuance on top of nuance.
not to say previous seasons didnt do this, but this season ABSOLUTELY is entirely filled with characters like this
lmk season 5 spoilers, as well as anything from previous seasons just in case cause idk. might get long too tbh oopsies JINNGFDOIJN
we have a few characters to consider for LMK s5's "villains".
we have Ne Zha's dad (i forget his name, ill probably call him pagoda man), nine headed dragon (consort, 10th king, xiangliu) and nuwa. we could theoretically consider thousand eyed demon, however hes only relevant in one episode so id hardly count that
pagoda man is the easiest to explain, he is an antagonistic force because hes trying to hold onto what little order there is left of the world, he is trying to be the duct tape keeping the sawed in half boat together, and hes trying to minimize risks. does that excuse how he treats ne zha? fuck no, but thats a whole different discussion and depending on your interpretation of how much of the chinese mythos you use for this work will vary. he is just like mk as mk himself points out, it doesnt have to be just pagoda man doing the work, theres people willing to help, and then he joins the heroes side for the end.
cool, great, now. what the fuck do i mean by nuwa?
this is where interpretation is strongest, where it is key. ill just be sharing my perspective. when i was first watching season 5 my partner pointed out to me that in chinese mythos chaos is a core element of the world, it is necessary. this, coupled with the fact that nuwa made mk to fix a cycle she created (which we also dont know how many cycles the world has gone through, it could be one, it could be two, it could be in the hundreds if not thousands, whos to say.) and to keep chaos out... she is keeping the world from being complete. her little cave without the outside world, without proper balance, her little people living blissfully apocalypse to apocalypse. "but theyll all die!" "theyll live again" nuwa says, smile on her face.
she is disconnected from her cave, her world her people, her creations, who knows how long shes been in the limbo, how well she can perceive time, how many times a sacrifice comes in, they get a few words exchanged before they just leave, her in the pillar, only getting glimpses when the cycle is ending of the world, only to be shut in again.
neat, ok, but xiangliu??? hes who was gestured at from the BEGINNING of season 4.
see. heres where we get into the GOOD shit.
this is why it is important to establish that we dont know how many cycles have happened. we do not know how long he has been stuck, how many times he has tried to fix the world over and over. he makes it clear in his ending dialogue, if only he knew how to fix it, that sharing the power of the stones was the key to his freedom. the fact that he goes from what most would consider the least important title to the most important one, his own name, the fact he states he was wukongs friend, his enemy, both, wukong just doesnt remember
that implies longentivity. that implies so many cycles and lifetimes lived inside this cycle, being aware of everything, being so damnably aware of what one considers true freedom, and having to sit at the precipice of that.
it is agony.
xiangliu for the majority of the season is the only one to call mk by his name. mk gets so often called child, kid, nicknames by the others, maybe mei refers to him as mk, but xiangliu has it be DELIBERATE. he altered the course of the cycle to give mk a life, to let him HAVE a life where nuwa didnt care for one, he WANTED mk to grow enough that he would be able to choose. because everything is about mks choice, his ability to choose it all matters on HIS. CHOICE.
the only time this falters is when xiangliu thinks he is trapped for good. he rushes at mk, one final chance at freedom seemingly taken from him. xiangliu never fights mk. he only fights the others when they start fighting him. when its just him and mk at the edge of the world, at the edge of chaos, he talks to mk. tells him what to expect, mentions a mysterious "he" now that mk has opened the cage. and he pushes mk back so he gets to go back to his life. so that mk can have choices still. xiangliu got what he wanted, so its only right mk gets what he wanted too. to live with his friends and let everyone live a life where they can figure something out.
that is why i do not think there are villains in lego monkie kid season 5. they are antagonists with layers of nuance, nuance we arent privy to for reason or another, be it episode count, length, screentime, or that were just not supposed to yet. season 5 does not have an obvious bad guy, a villain, because the nuance is right within our grasp.
thank you for reading this. fucking essay apparently oopsies JINNGFDIJN
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thepumpkincorsair · 2 months
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So, I watched the first episode of “Those About To Die” on Peacock.
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I enjoyed it, and Im willing to do write ups if folks would be interested…
Since I wana talk about details, and I dont wana spread spoilers, everything is below the readmore.
What I liked: 🔵 And what I disliked: 🟠
Total Ranking: 8/10 - very good, worth the watch 👍
🟠 It dove into the Intrigue right away, which made it hard to watch while doing other things, but I can appreciate a show that grabs you by the shoulders and shoves you down into the couch to pay attention.
🔵 It wasn’t boring, quite the contrary, I felt fully engaged throughout the episode. Theres a lot of small moving parts to the story, and it orchestrates together incredibly well so far, even for Episode One. The writing is very well done, which is a lynchpin for me on a show like this. You cant pretend to be an intrigue type series without a proper plot. And, in my opinion, they’ve set their plots well right away. Tenax getting those shares in Blue was a great con, which had clearly been going a while, but we only saw the tail end of it. I see this little setup as a great look at how the writers DO their work. Connections matter, money does more than talk, and if you play the game wrong, you die. Don’t trust anyone.
🔵 I REALLY enjoyed the historical aspects of the first episode. Like, yes, this plot happened, its a historical fiction and a number of these characters exist in history, but its not just that. Its the small details, the different knives in different cultures, the veterinary care of race horses, the deities from more than just the main roman pantheon, the drinkware, the VARIOUS clothes from various cultures and climates…. And yes, women often went topless when they were a sxwrkr. Gotta advert.
🔵 ON THAT SUBJECT: can we talk about “3 sesterce… and Im tighter than both of them.” MY BOY, YOU ARE RIZZIN TOO HARD AND I LOST IT. Please, please let him be in future episodes. Omfg….
🟠 I am forced to concede the accuracy isnt PERFECT, the horses wore modern driving bridles to go with their ancient styled chariots. However, Im realistic about how many horses are trained today to pull anything without blinders, and how much safer modern bridles are. I’ll also note: I absolutely saw the animal handler grab the horse differently (calmly) before the riot surrounded it, then direct the horse to dance in the crowd. Great training with the horse! Bad camera angle. Lol
🔵 I also really like this cast so far. Everyone fills their roles incredibly well.
Hopkins doesnt even need an introduction, the mans a legend and brings all his experience to the stage with him every time. -chefs kiss-
Rheon was great in GOT, he plays calculatingly unhinged exceptionally well. But I wont lie, seeing him in a more commanding, level headedly calculating person?
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Hashim….. HASHIM!!! Im SO excited to see where his character goes. We haven’t seen much of him in Ep 1 just yet, but he’s clearly going to be one of the main players. Im not familiar with him as an actor, but I’ve enjoyed his performance so far, and I REALLY appreciate the story being told.
Martins is also incredible. She does a fantastic job of knowing the danger her characters children are facing, but also knowing she HAS to play her cards right to save them. She personifies the strength and determination of a mother perfectly.
🔵 Quite honestly, I have to give points to that whole plot-line in general. That point of view is something we’ve had hidden from us (in America) for so long, that I think a LOT of people have… become calloused. I hope seeing it will potentially help others come to an empathetic understanding. This isn’t glossing over what happened, or whats likely to happen to any of the three children.
🔵 I also want to gush over actually SHOWING the wider Roman Empire, we get to see the direct effect of their influence in both Africa and Spain so far. Egypt was their bread basket, and without that grain, youve got problems. The Berber Coast has animals, and people they want, and we see money exchanging hands for the purpose of those ends. We see how the locals were told they’d be treated fairly, paid properly, and even eventually become citizens, like the Spaniards, only to have those promises thrown aside as soon as the Romans have better money to make. These people gave the Empire everything it wanted, but the Empire is never satisfied.
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We also get to appreciate how far west the empire went when the Spaniards are trying to sell their horses. (Plot-bunny: Andies are dancing horses, exceptionally athletic, and a prime choice for chariots, though, a standardbred is the usual choice for modern cart racers)
🟠 I will say the CGI isnt the best. You can tell exactly when they change from live action to CGI. But this is a minor issue for me tbh. Its passable CGI, and they use it to avoid putting animals or people in danger which, obviously, I appreciate. A chariot wreck was shown, annnnnd it was pretty darn accurate to how messy those would have been. Not good times y’all. Not good times. Also, the ramifications of a major concussion. Oof. At least the guy would have barely knew what was happening? Still.
🔵 The sound effects were enough without being over the top. Often times when theres gore to show, theres all these extra squelching noises and gratuitous blood… not this time. It’s actually… pretty durn accurate. Don’t ask how I know. I don’t wana tell you, and you dont wana know.
Overall, it was a really solid first episode, and I plan on watching the rest.
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socksandbuttons · 10 months
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i love ur bloodmoon thoughts sm and i agree with all of them ‼️‼️
they squandered his character sm and theres barely been any development since he got brought back to life… especially on the KC side. id love to see how youd rewrite it tbh- or if you want feel free to just use this ask as a bloodmoon thoughts dump
ALRIGHT SO We can run along with bm2 But also them going 'no their NOT the original thus we dont need to think about their charascter' as they seemingly established a bit with that but also not? Like that kinda furthers BM's whole arc of being treated like a murder machine (he was LITERALLY rebuilt for that, nothing more than tool!), and yet instead of USING THAT (which like.... we kinda got a bit of that with Eclipse, no i wont get into that.) they go 'HMNNN no, we dont wanna develop this further hes just villain' LIKE. SURE. ALRIGHT. BUT... YOU LITERALLY HAD SO MANY SET UPS WITH LIKE... His weird attachment to monty that one TIME yknow the 'hes my dad!' even tho hes not and its very debatable with Eclipse and KC depending how you wanna go about it (In terms of WHO made bloodmoon its Eclipse whos derived from KC and Moon and SUN.) Where was I YEAH HIS THEME OF NO ONE IS FAMILY BUT BLOODMOON. Only THEY understand that theyre not a tool or worthless! (Yknow just completely missing a way to use their codependence to help further their own coping of SEVERAL THINGS.) Yet he still STILL seeked out and called KC father, he still somewhat has thoughts on family. He's going after EARTH who's just vibin' trying to be accepting, even jealous of LUNAR for 1) being brought back and two) survived Eclipse and lives happily (sorta) and while begrudgingly i must say forgot bloodmoon. (WHICH LIKE. THATS THEIR OWN FAULT FOR NOT DRAGGING LUNAR INTO THAT PLOT EVEN THO HE HAD ALL THIS BLOODMOON INFO DURING THAT WHOLE THING. not used it ONCE. they purposely left lunar out of that and thats annoying. chaos sibligns 4 lyfe) Anyway you COULD so still use that in regards to Sun trying to reach out to them ('I wouldve loved another brother' will forever be brought up. also literally in the same convo sun does admit hed kill em again but WE'RE FOCUSING ON THE FAMILY PART GUYS) I'd have to scrap some like... lets see here.... UmMM i CAN use the attacking lunar thing still. Cause whole jealous thing they didnt understnad their own thoughtS (THEY THOUGHT MONTY WAS THEIR PARENT WHICH LIKE??? a stretch honestly. cmon we know this. theyre definitely making their own excuses) iDK ABOUT attacking earth, cause by that point everyone is kinda dead set on murdering them its actually pretty bad by that point unless KC comes back jesus style and goes 'NO. I'll handle this' proceeds to drag bloodmoon off into the desert for family bonding time (and rehabilitation.) Which he wont but we also gotta remember Bloodmoon is deliberately being used a scapegoat (despite yknow... he did DO all that by his volition still like he WOULD NOT have gone after kc like that if not for ruin going 'hey u wanna see ur dad who totoally didnt care for ur ass' or 'you should totally go kill a bunch of people. and then threaten lunar and earth BUT WAIT no killing ill shock u!' im losing focus but THEY WERE... sort of going somewhere with Bloodmoon not wanting to be a tool. AND having solar interfere (I still hate that whole 'he reminds me of my moon thus he must die'. Retcons... everywhere. Remember when he wanted to save his moon?? yeah? cool cause ill never forget that actually.) KC dying actually WOULDNT have been so bad (aside the... suddenly being an ass about it. But he was direct to bloodmoon about 'BRUH UR BEING USED.' and them never actually... bringing that up too much) angering BM enough to kill KC is actually pretty solid way to use the whole 'Bm not satisfied with Killing' as a very direct way KC's words last on BM especially BM's whole unstable emotions of NOT understanding the feelings theyre going through because of that other than anger (denial, grief, confusion and conflict of how Hurt that mustve been they wanted more family) oh this is getting long and im losing focus.
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the-s1lly-corner · 1 year
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Hello how are you :3? I was wondering if you could write E.J., Hoodie, and Masky with a s/o that has a lot of scars? (Toby too but platonic for him) I’m not sure how many people we can request so if it’s too many just Hoodie? I’m sorry if this makes you uncomfortable and thank you!
Various!Creepypastas w/ a scarred!reader
waaaah im so sorry for not seeing this sooner! i didnt recieve a notification for this ask!! really theres no limit to how many characters you can send in! i think my personal max varies from prompt to prompt!! mix of how they approach the concept of a scarred lover (friend in tobys case) with some hints of fluff! cause of scars will be vague as admittedly i didnt know if you meant general scars or SH! side note i hope this posts right! im writing this on my computer, im used to mobile!! + apologies for any weird wording or typos, im listening to music and im getting hyped!! not proof read we die like my spiderverse brainrot
Includes: Eyeless Jack, Hoodie, Masky and Platonic!Toby!
CWs: touch and go talk of potential past trauma, body image issues, vague mentions of SH(?) in EJs part + Toby's parts
admittedly admin doesnt know if its technically SH due to the nature and motiv but personally id still count it as such and tag it as such
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Eyeless Jack;
he gets it, he really does. the basic run down of my hc/take on ej is that he wasnt always some flesh eating monster; just some dude who got caught up in some bad stuff
so naturally, he doesnt... really vibe well with the concept of eating human flesh, which can lead to a few... instances. from intentionally to accidentally harming himself while hes lost in his instincts
so hes no stranger to being a little roughed up around the edges
but hes a stranger to comforting; he'll likely approach it from a logical side before trying anything else. "you've been hurt," before going on a small tangent about the formation of scars. hes not the most... emotionally... good... available... person
so youre going to need to lay out the general basis for what you need for basic comfort, on days where your scars become an issue; be is needing comfort or a distraction. it may take him a while, but hell eventually start to pick up on cues and hints as your relationship develops
otherwise hes very neutral about them, again approaching them with a blunt view; seeing it as neither good nor bad. he doesnt draw attention to them, but he doesnt act like theyre gross
really just. vibing with it, doesnt make a huge deal of it since he feels he doesnt have any place to judge, nor does he feel its his business to pry for information
solid 6/10 imo, hell comfort you if you express that you need it but hell likely not go out of his way to do it
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Hoodie;
Soft touches, he almost does it before he has your permission to touch you
naturally he has his own fair share of scars from various.. activities
really im still all jumbled up with how i wanna write him and masky; not sure if i want to make them like how they are in their MH source or lean into the proxy thing that was prominent in the early days of the fandom... lowkey leaning into the proxy thing for this post because im more... versed..? in that, but anyhow
hes more upfront and compassionate than eyeless jack, in fact hes probably the most caring out of the four in todays post... maybe thats because i read one (1) fic years back that changed my entire approach to his character but! yeah
subconsciously trails his hands on them when the two of you are holding one another; something gentle and intimate, not too obnoxious to make you self conscious, but not careful enough to go unnoticed
i view hoodie, and by extension brian if i end up considering him and tim fully seperate from their 'proxy' parts, as a very tactile person
true to the popular fanon interpretation, hoodie doesnt speak much. but that only makes him a better listener, so on days where things get hard, hell let you talk his ears off with anything thats bothering you. very rarely, hell speak up and offer some words of advice, most times hell inch closer to grasp you. though it does get awkward since most the time hes just. blankly staring at you silently without emoting or saying a word
overall? personally hes a 7/10 for me, i would rank him higher if he were more verbal, but thats just because admin has an easier time venting if its a two way convo; but overall hell make sure that your scars dont effect your worth
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Masky;
very similarly to hoodie, masky also has his own set of scars for the same reasons
he probably starts pointing out his own scars to you and mumbles about where they came from if he knows their origins
this doesnt mean "oh hes invalidating your experiences and hes trying to make it about himself," but more so "hes showing that he really does get it and he doesnt mean to talk over you"
much like EJ he approaches scars with a very blunt and upfront mindset, but to a lesser extent. he admits that whatever led up to the tissue forming, it hurt. emotionally and physically, and hes not going to deny that simple fact. hell listen to you, have a conversation with you about it, and try to help you through whatever you may be currently going through regardless of if youre injury is relevant.
or at least, thats what hes trying to do.
hes still has his own personal issues regarding going about his own problems in a healthy manner but hey thats something for another post; maybe, if i remember
honestly this post doesnt have enough fluff imo, and i can kinda see masky doing this, but imagine he boops his mask against your scars in a mockery of a kiss (doesnt take off his mask often, in fact youll probably never ever see him without it on), i can see jack doing this too tbh
thoughts? 8/10, gets the bonus points for being less awkward to rant to imo, plus i think asides ej, i think i have a bias for masky for the simple fact i had the fattest crush on him when i was in middle school
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Toby;
okay! this one is going to be interesting for one main reason! i actually havent touched tobys character in YEARS! so hes probably going to have the shorter list... obligatory i havent built any solid hcs for him past what was going on in the fandom in the 2010s, before toby briefly became a mild discomfort... but we're back in business baby!! (^^ dont feel bad for requesting for toby btw! hes no longer a discomfort, and if i didnt want to write for him i wouldnt be including him right here!!)
obviously we cant talk about his part without talking about his cheek. and other, similar hcs. while i dont think most of the self inflicted marks on his body were from a place of.. for lack of better words, darkness; it doesnt change the fact he still has them. i think a lot of them are from the fact he cant feel anything; accidental burns, gnawing through his cheek, digging his fingers deep into himself. really i could go into detail, but due to the aforementioned fact that my take on him isnt as developed as other characters + i really dont think its appropriate for this post (or really, anywhere on this account,), ill stop there
while he cant relate to the physical pain of what caused your scars, he can sympathize through your feelings. do you feel sorrow, or anger to whoever hurt you? hell be getting worked up right with you, because to him youre one of his closest friends
i feel like he doesnt talk much about his past, regarding his family. but hed tell you, and you can sure as hell bet that hell do his absolute damndest to grant you the same feeling of security.
hell probably touch and prod without truly meaning any harm, but thats because he can have problems with boundaries, but hell listen if you sit him down and tell him it makes you uncomfortable if it does
more so emotional than outwardly... supportive? idk the words, but hes very empathetic with you and tries to relate to you through emotion rather than feeling what you felt. honestly? kinda based for that, but maybe thats because i dont see feelings about this topic being touched on, usually its straight up about how the scar makes the person look or the physical trauma they had gone through, but idk, maybe thats just a me thing
he can be an asshole at times but hell usually backtrack and cool off somewhere else if you call him out on it imo
not sure if its because as im LITERALLY investigating his characteristics and interpretations as we speak, but i think im starting to relate to him so ER-OH!
anyways, i wish i could make his segment more... in tune with the characters above but its probably going to take me a while until im comfortable with how i portray this dude, which sucks because as a kid he was probably one of my favorites
i dont think im going to give toby a rating like the others; since i dont think i can accurate rate him due to the lack of proper concrete ideas outside of him being empathetic to your emotional pain since he cant relate on how much it hurt
im gonna end this here since im starting to sound like a broken record on tobys part so!
i hope you enjoyed this! characterization may be a little off but i blame that mostly on the fact that i kinda fell out of the loop in regards for writing for these guys (that damn spider movie! the brainrot threw me off my creepypasta grind!/j) but its good to be back writing for this fandom! it was a fun little brain exercise trying to figure out each character goes about this kind of thing without making them all the same!! with that being said, im going to go listen to an audio reading of tobys story so i can regrounded in his character and hopefully do him some justice in the future!
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tansyuduri · 4 months
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Merlin Loregasm Rewatch S1E6 (Part1)
Hi Everyone! Welcome to my rewatch of Merlin focusing on the lore. I am a giant nerd so pretty excited about this. We’re on A REMEDY TO CURE ALL ILLS
(Hoo boy theres gonna be a LOT of lore in this one! Let's go!)
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Ok more examples on how medical knowledge in Camalot is HUGLY advanced despite still beliving in Humorism and four elements. Gaius originally blames Morgana's condition on inflammation of the brain perhaps caused by infection. Infection itself was not understood and tended to be blamed on bad air, god, planetary conjunction, or natural disasters (Mostly bad air and god if it was a widespread contagion though) Some folk healers DID know how to tend it with herbs! The idea that an infection could be inside or effect distant areas like the brain in this kinda way is pretty advanced. Again I chalk this up to the world having magic. Another tool to understand what is going on around them that real history did not.
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Gaius: see if you can find me some fresh rosemary and Yarrow
Rosemary and Yarrow can be combined to help achy joints, inflamed muscles, nerve pain, wounds, bruises, swelling, inflammation, and sprains Rosemary also stimulates circulation and blood flow
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The idea of a remedy to cure all ills was very much a thing. It was called a panacea and was around as an idea from Greek times and named after a Greek goddess of medicine. Elements and Humors ALSO came from greek times, Greeks were hugely influential in science. It was greatly sought by alchemists and people of learning. This is likely part of why Arthur was not like GTFO. (Even if he was not interested in the offer at first out of loyalty to Gauis) More on this in a sec
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Arthur: He says he has a remedy to cure all ills
Gaius: Impossible
Arthur: For Morgana's sake surely we should at least hear him out. I mean what have we go to loose. Please father
Gaius: Probably some Charlatan hoping for a quick shilling
Arthur: I don't care if she is about to die what harm can it do!?
Two things to address here. First of all Gaius is not pulling the charlatan idea out of nowere Or the impossible. As much as a Panacrea was believed to exist. There was no proof of the concept. One might hear about it existing in distant lands or the like. But someone like Gaius might be skeptical of the concept after his MANY MANY years spent in medical practice. Its possible he tried and failed to create it himself too. FURTHERMORE selling a supposed Panacrea was a thing MANY MANY charlatans did. It was perfect for praying on desperate people.
Now onto Shilling, I belvie this is the only time a unit of money is mentioned specifically in Merlin. It originalted from an anglo saxon phrase that meant twentieth of a pound. It was intoduced as "Shilling" much later in history. So I belive it is being used here as a generalism for a small amount of money. I don't think there are actually shillings in the Merlin universe. BUT one never knows. There are a lot of other historicaly inacurate things. Its part of what makes the show so fun!
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This checks out Alchemy was thought to be the way to create a Panacrea . It was mainly focused on finding a way to create enternal life and gold though the philosophers stone. (More in later eppisodes) But it was also the forerunner of modern chemistry thus a physician would use a LOT of the same equipment!
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Okay in Medieval times this would normally be known as apoplexy. It came from, the greek word apoplexia meaning to be stuck down suddenly with violance, Apoplexy meant when a person was struck down for seemlingly no reason without conviousness or motion maintaining pulse and breathing and later came cover things like stokes or Cerebral Hemorrage. It was still though this was caused by Humoral issues. This would presist to near modern day. It was not until 1658 that Cerebral Hemorage was first identified as a thing diferant from other types of Apoplexy So again Medicine in BBC Merlin is WAY ahead of its time. I will chalk it up in these case once again to the existance of magic, but ALSO to the fact that autopsies were likley a thing! (I've said this many times but this is more evidence to my theory as autopsies were integral of seperating apoplexy into diferant things.)
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Morgana uses the word Heaven here. While the word usualy has a conotation of christianity/jusdism/islam it can also mean pagan afterlives. Still I'm making a note in case it becomes important later.
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Gaius: I wish to see the court records for the time of the great purge
Geoffery: what possible need could you have for those.
Gaius: I fear that the past may have come back to haunt us
Geoffery: all the mroe reason to keep the records hidden
Gaius: I know that neither of us wants to remember that time, but this is a matter of great urgency.
Geoffery: The record are sealed they cannot be oppened. Uther has forbidden it.
Okay we need to examine WHY Uther might have forbidden it. He has no trouble thinking about it. He has no issue mentioning it. The first episode is a celebration of it!
I mean the fact he was later tormented be seeing the souls of those he killed MIGHT hint he had some regrets about what he did? But he might just have been terrified to see them back? And compared to everything else where he seems to have no regrets?
SOOO perhaps It has to do with Ygraine's death and Arthur's birth. But they can't have recorded what they did right? Since that is a big secret? OR DID they somehow record it and Geoffery was actually one of the few in the know? Perhaps he never looked at the documents? WHY WOULD YOU RECORD IT?
If Nimueh was indeed court sorceress perhaps Uther doesnt want Arthur to be able to look at the records and see OH dad had a court sorceress that escaped just after I was born!
I'm KINDA a bit stumped here UNLESS
the line "I know neither of us wants to remember that time" Okay sure it could be Geoferry just doesnt want to remember all the people dying. BUT could it mean he was into magic too? Or had a loved one who was into magic? Was he actually IN on Arthurs birth too? Or told about it. DID THEY ACTUALLY RECORD THAT SHIT? WHY? I think they possably actually recorded it. It makes the most sence because storywise this could then be another hint at the mystery of Arthur's birth that is a bit of a focus this season and is being built up.
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Okay Angels are not pagan at ALL. they are christian/jewish/muslim (and a few others) So we have a point towoerd at elast one of those being comon place in the merlin world. I know some fans debate camalot being some form of early christian which is why I am paying attention to all these little religion things.
My currant working theory is that there is a weirdly pagan or pagan-ajasent version of christianity that is left over from when the romans where in control. And has had a long time to blend with the traditional godess religion/culture in isolation of other christian sects. Thus a "New Religon" existing.
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This is what he says giving over the records. Which okay? I mean they both likley already know what is inside. but I guess disobeying a direct order from Uther can be a death sentance? I feel like there is somthing I am missing.
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I think him mentioning this is really intersting. BECAUSE the dreams are not gonna stop. He has no reason to think they will stop. So by implying they were a warning for her condition. So either he plans to bring the condition back, Or is counting on the fact he is not going to stay for too long. He can chalk them up to her recovering sure. but eventually she will recover. Just an intersting hint that he knows he will not be staying too long.
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Gaius: I often wondered what happened to that poor young boy
Edwin: I told you we've never met before
Gaius: I didn't realize who you were until I check the records you used your mother's maiden name. You are Gregor and Jaden's Son
Edwin: They were freinds of yours.
Gaius: They were sorceres
Edwin: They practiced magic, so did a lot of people back them Gaius.
Gaius: Uther will be furrius when he finds out who you are
Edwin: Fine, Fine shall we tell him? lets go tell him. Lets tell him, Lets tell him everything ooh! I know we could also tell him about Merlin?
Gaius: merlin?"
Edwin: you didn't know he was a sorcerer? Tsk, ahhh I wonder what Uther will do. Problubly have him burned? Gaius: you would betray another sorccerer
Edwin: You did when you turned a blind eye and let my parents die at the hands of Uther. At least Merlin doesnt have a son that will try to rescue him from the flames? Okay first of all going back to my post on episode one I wonder if a last name means noble. If so its intersting because Uther did not reconize a noble family because a maiden name was used. Or hes not and last names are a fluke. Also although Gaius later reveals that his parents practiced dark magic he did not bring it up here. Or deny he was freinds with them. Possably because he knew it would not convince Edwin? And not everyone who practiced magic back then (A lot of people) could have used dark magic. This is the first time we realize that Gaius was essentully a colaborater. Its not a good look for him. Not only did he choose to let his freinds die to stick by Uther. HE IS STILL trying to protect Uther. But he is willing to give up Uther to protect Merlin. And is later revealed to have saved Alice. So some part of me wonders how close of freinds they could have been? One thing I wonder is if Gaius actually agreed with Uther on a level. Perhaps there were a lot of people abusing magic. (As hinted at in episode one) So he actually thinks magic is often bad and often corrupts. (To be clear I'm not excusing his behavior.) This is why he is so hesitant to let Morgana know about her magic. And he is so strict with Merlin and his. "Its not good or bad its how you use it." But a lot of people give into power and use it for bad? Is this his view?
I know a lot of people equate magic with being born diferant. I do too. Its part of why I relate to Merlin so much. But it seems like for some people in the merlin world it is less who they are and a means of Power for good or ill. (For others they are totally born with it) It does give people power others do not have (Just like being royalty does for example) I am a firm beliver of the idea that power reveals. And we see this a lot in Merlin, both in the choices Uther VRS Arthur make. and in the choices diferant sorcerers make. Back on topic I'm trying to understand why Gaius makes the choices he does. And I think the most likley thing is the man on some level ACTUALLY is afraid of magic and its capacity to currupt which he has seen a lot of and thus supports Uther one some level, perhaps this is even subconcious.
Again this is Tumblr so I need to make clear I DO NOT THINK HE IS IN THE RIGHT HERE. Gaius if this is true is missing HUGE Aspects he should take into consiteration. And the purge? the things Uther did? Just no!
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This is intersting because there were not many developments in real medieval time. Another sigh there medical knowlage is very diferant in the Merlin World AND I'm cutting off here. Party because I accidenly posted partly because there is SO MUCH LORE! I will come with part 2 soon!
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megamind2010 · 7 months
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Ladybug dies how
peacefully in her sleep at the ripe old age of 94 NAYYYYY IM SORRY
Assuming youre here cuz koby told you to come and yell at me for doing this and id like to say first of all im very sorry i just love tragedy soooo much. koby got really mad at me when i first brought up the idea and it also tortures me horribly too And we also talk a lot about the alternate universe where she doesnt die and instead she and casey just move to new york and hang out and get married and Chill Out
but in the "canon" ending im sorry yes nell dies (ducking rocks and bricks) IMMM SORRY! She's subject to the hereditary blue beetle curse of dying in a fight tragically young (she jumped in front of the metaphorical bullet for jaime on account of he's exempt because he has a much healthier support system than other beetles)
i'm a hack so i haven't really drawn or written anything concrete about it but how it goes down in my mind is your classic event/crisis where all the heroes are mobilised to fight off the annual universe destroying threat. this time it's aliens of some kind and while the league and the rest of the important guys are up there fighting or negotiating or punching the universe or however this particular one gets solved, ladybug is down on the ground in gotham helping to evacuate people and deal with some alien scouts/robots/etc that are menacing civilians. (casey has already been evacuated and is safely sheltering underground with a bunch of other civilians, being checked in on every now and then by some flash or another, & her general attitude is UGH Can you idiots get this sorted out so we can order chinese and watch real housewives...)
it happens while ladybug is getting a family to safety and an alien scout lands on the roof of their apartment. he ushers them downstairs and to his credit does a good job of holding off the attacker while the civilians get out of there - nell has no powers but is a very competent fighter and also is decked out with plenty of kordtech gadgets to help even the playing field :] but it's been a long day and she's so exhausted and there's only so much you can do when an alien shoots you in the chest with a laser and flies away and leaves you to bleed out
so there's nell with her communications down & unable to move & lying there staring at the sky full of invading spaceships and flying superheroes... if she could get someone's attention she might be okay but everyone is busy. it's a crisis! and nell knows that, she knows what this whole business is like, and she's been ready for something like this to happen for a while. nell is a very confident person but she isn't deluded about her own mortality... it's part of her personal philosophy that it's cruel to have too many attachments if you're likely to die horribly young (a mentality learned from the death of her mother and refined by the death of ted kord) so isnt it great that she doesnt have many friends? and that she's on okay terms but not super close with her family? and that casey doesnt actually care about her at all and wont be affected by her untimely death past the inconvenience of finding a new place to live?
lol
at the end of it all nell isn't really that upset about dying... they went out doing something worthwhile, they saved lives, they did the best they could with what they had, and they made a positive impact on the world while they were here. and that's about what he's always wanted to achieve so hey a+ work ladybug! obviously its not like he WANTS to die, theres always more to do, things he's going to miss... he'll miss talking to ted, working on gadgets and sorting through problems and making him laugh... he'll miss his family obviously but they'll be fine without him... michelle is someone she hadn't expected to get so close to, but she and ted both have booster to keep them on track
really annoyingly as she's closing her eyes the person who keeps coming into her mind though is casey. At this point nell is pretty aware that she cares about casey more than she ever planned or wanted to and has done a lot of mental gymnastics to convince herself that it's fine that nothing ever came of it (and now nothing ever will) and in her last moments she reassures herself that it's onesided and casey doesn't love her and he'll be fine without nell and You did a great job at not forming attachments ladybug that's why you're the best! but she can't help the surge of intense regret and fuuuuuck what if it was different and what if what if.........
here's my primo ladybug dying on a roof song
Nell's fatal flaw will always be her self-reliance and conviction that she's doing things the right way despite it all. if she bothered to communicate with the people in her life then she might be swayed on her views on love, or if she was less stupidly independent then maybe she would have been working with another hero and wouldn't have been in this situation. but that's tragedy i suppose, knowing how a character could have escaped their fate and yet having to accept that in this scenario with this set of rules there was no other way for this to happen
anyway if you'd prefer to think about nell alive and happy living in new york with casey then please do that. It's easy and free and it makes me smile
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