#like so stiff with her hands by her sides

[warlocksoup]

into the spider-verse: nishinoya yuu

volume one, chapter one: emails

word count: 2.1k

masterlist | main masterlist | taglist

I know about him.

Teeth gnawing on the inside of her cheek, she stares down at her laptop screen. At the same email she’s been staring at for the last three days, ever since she first got the notification for it on her subway ride home. From ijs99ETJfdhsg@yahoo.com: I know about him. To anyone else, it might not bear the same weight. To her, it’s suffocating.

She’s done everything she can to try and trace it. Everything she can, of course, being Googling the address and enlisting the help of Yachi from the IT department at the Bugle. The outcome of the former being: Your search - ijs99ETJfdhsg@yahoo.com- did not match any documents, and the outcome of the latter being Yachi’s entire laptop getting infected with malware.

So, not great.

She shifts on the stiff stuffing of her couch, legs crossed under her and the heat from the bottom of her laptop on the bare skin of her thighs. I know about him. She hopes it’s a bluff. Realistically, she knows it’s not. But she’s still in the denial stage.

The screen goes dark, and she wiggles her mousepad to brighten it up once more, just so she can stare longer. She can’t tell him. Not yet. Ideally, not ever. But definitely not yet.

“What are you doing?”

She jolts, automatically slamming her laptop shut as she does so and jumping to face the source of the intrusion.

Spider-Man’s in her living room.

Which is fair. It’s his living room too, even if she does pay the lion’s share of the rent.

“Porn,” is her immediate response and the only thing she can think of to justify her reaction, even if it makes her cheeks burn. “Watching porn,” she doubles down, because she has to.

He reaches behind his head and grabs the end of his mask that sits at the back of his neck, pulling it off in one swift movement. Nishinoya looks at her with his hair flattened against his forehead, blond streak brushing against his brow, and a blossoming, deep purple purse spread across his cheek. “In the living room? Well, I guess I am home early, so can’t complain there.”

She pushes her the laptop off to the couch, and stalks towards him, eyes now fixed on the bruise that stains his features. “And what the fuck happened to you?”

Noya grins at her, bright and unfazed. Almost proud, like his injuries are a badge of honor. “Just ran into my good friend Alexei Sytsevich. He was super stoked to see me.”

Her hand shoots out and takes hold of his jaw, lightly squishing the soft flesh of his cheek together as she tilts his head to the side, trying to get a better look at the damage. Noya just stands there and lets her. “Thought that guy was in jail.”

“Broke out,” Noya says, words barely making it out between his smooshed-up lips. She releases him, and steps back. “He loves breaking out of jail. It’s like his favorite thing to do.”

Noya steps back, and retreats into his bedroom, closing the door with his foot as he does so. Still, she can hear his voice coming through their thin, plaster walls. “I don’t even know what that guy’s end game is anymore. I’m pretty sure he just wants me dead. It’s always like, ‘this is your end, Spider!’ when before he was a lot more focused on his personal goals, so.” 

She sighs and collapses back onto the couch again. Freak emails from freak strangers with untraceable email addresses and Sytsevich breaking out of jail for the thousandth-fucking-time to wreck his havoc on Noya’s face. Her hair is going to start turning gray. “You’d think they would’ve built a cell to hold him, by now,” she calls, and Noya is swinging open his bedroom door to saunter back out into living room, suit abandoned in favor of old gym shorts and a vintage looking Godilla t-shirt. “What do you think costs more taxpayer dollars, building a better cell, or paying all those cops to get him back in again?”

Noya rolls his eyes. “Well, I’m the one they call, and they don’t pay me, so.”

That she knows all too well. It’s hard, being a single-income home. Since Noya’s full time job is both incredibly demanding and also unpaid, rent and utilities and groceries mostly fall on her shoulders. Which, it’s not like she can complain or hold it against him. In exchange, he’s the one and only Spider-Man, and she could do worse for roommates.

And he helps when he can, selling candid photos of Spider-Man to the Bugle so they can use them to accompany their hit pieces on him (Noya, of course, finds it incredibly ironic every time they write out a check to him, gleefully paying him for photos of himself).

Noya flicks on the kitchen light, and as he’s lingering in the kitchen, popping open the fridge door with his hip to stare blankly at its contents, she grabs at her laptop once more, opening it back up so she can stare at the email once more. “Do you wanna get a pizza tonight? Some guy gave me a twenty for saving his car from the Rhino’s path.”

“Twenty?” she echoes back, fingers hovering over the reply button. Should she reply? What would she even say? Her Internet safety training at work taught her to never reply to spam emails, just to report it to the system administrator. But looping in the Bugle on an email like this is the last thing she wants. “Seems kinda cheap for saving his entire car.”

“Beggars can’t be choosers,” Noya calls back, closing the fridge. He flicks his wrist in the direction of the living room, and string of white web following it. It attaches itself to the side of a crinkled up, plastic water bottle she was drinking, and before she can blink, the water bottle finds itself in Noya’s hand.

“Dick,” she says, without looking up from her computer. “I was drinking that.”

“Can you look at your porn later? Do you want the pizza or not?”

🕸 ｡𖦹°‧✩｡🕷˚⋆｡

Between them is a half-eaten box of pepperoni pizza, propped open on the fire escape. Noya chews loudly on a slice, his eyes on the city skyline, and hers on him. She watches the bruise on his cheek, and how it moves and shifts with each bite he takes. She reaches out and grazes her thumb against it. He swats her hand away. “Stop it, stop worrying.”

She frowns and slides her hand between her pressed-together knees, like she’s trying to hold it still. “Who the fuck said I’m worried?”

“You’re always worried,” he replies, dusting off the end of his pizza nad leaning up against the closed window behind him. “Every time I come home with so much as a papercut, you’re staring at me like there’s a bullet hole in my chest.”

Her eyes drops, and she looks at the greased-stained cardboard between them. “Well, you have come home with bullet holes before, so.”

He sleeps them off. He wraps up the wound in that fucking webbing of his and he just sleeps it off like it’s a headache or scratch or something most people wouldn’t even go to the doctor for. And then she’ll find dried, rusted bits of that webbing, littered around the house.

“Yeah, and I turned out fine,” he assures her, voice a bit softer now. She looks at him, brown eyes shining and slight grin unwavering. “A bruise isn’t gonna kill me. I don’t want you to waste your energy freaking out over me. You have better things to be freaking out over. I know how horrible your boss is.”

She scoffs, rolling her eyes. “Yeah, but I don’t really give a shit about him, to be honest.”

Her fingers fidget, and Noya reaches over, covering both of her hands with his. She looks up at him. “I’ll always take care of us both. Okay? Nothing can happen to me while I’m out there, because I know I gotta come back home and make sure you’re good. That’s my number one priority, and I’m not gonna break that promise. Alright?”

She nods her head. “Yeah, alright. I trust you.”

His grin brightens, and he leans forward to throw his arm over her shoulder, pulling her into his side. “See, that’s my girl. Complete and total faith in me. I love to see it.”

“Whatever,” she grumbles, but rests her head against his shoulder. It feels nice, in his arms. “I’m really the one who takes care of you, y’know. By like, paying the bills.”

“Oh, that reminds me. Can I borrow ten bucks? I bet Tanaka-“

He stops and straightens out. She peers up at him, at watches as his focus narrows in on something in the distance. By the time she catches up, and she can hear the sirens start to go off in the distance, Nishinoya is gone, leaving a slight breeze against the strands of her hair.

🕸 ｡𖦹°‧✩｡🕷˚⋆｡

On her desk are two rejections.

The first is on Spider-Man, a feature piece that details his symbolic value to the people of New York; how valuable his presence in the community is and just what he represents to the average New Yorker. It theorizes that identity of Spider-Man isn’t what matters, but the meaning of the mask itself. And it has a big, yellow sticky note on it with the word ‘WRONG!’ written out angrily in thick, black marker.

She sighs. She knew that one wasn’t gonna make it past Jameson. Hardly any of her Spider-Man pieces do. Noya told her to just start writing smear pieces on him, just to get more articles published. But she’s not willing to sacrifice her journalistic integrity to write a bunch of bullshit about how her best friend is ‘getting in the way of the NYPD.’

The second is on the recently passed Norman Osborn. Most obituaries have been fluffy love letters to the capitalist, and maybe Jameson was expecting more of that, rather than a scathing dissection of his life, including, but not limited to, his involvement in developing and selling weapons of war. The sticky note on this one reads, ‘what is this commie crap?’ which, in all honesty, she should’ve been expecting.

She sighs and falls back into her chair. She needs a new, better job. At a place that will publish her articles without twisting her words into nonsense propaganda. A place that will pay her properly, and not like it’s nineteen-eighty-five.

There’s only one silver lining to her job, and that’s the blonde-haired girl depositing a hot latte and everything bagel on her desk. “Rejected again?” Yachi asks, pulling up a chair from the empty desk beside her.

“Ugh, apparently billionaire, tax-evading war criminal Norman Osborn was a friend to the masses that needs to be celebrated, and the guy that says innocent lives every day for free is public enemy number one,” she rants at once, snatching that coffee up and immediately gulping it down, ignoring how it burns her tongue on the way down.

“Yeah,” Yachi agrees. “You didn’t know that?”

She rolls her eyes, wiggling her mouse to wake up her computer. “Shut up.”

Yachi leans back in her chair, and gestures towards the computer screen. “Any more emails from that anonymous guy?”

“No, and thank god for that.”

“It’s so weird,” Yachi notes. “’I know about him,’ is weird, but they’re not threatening you for like, money or information or like any other average email scam. And from what I could see that guy really did not want to be tracked down, and spent a lot of time making sure you couldn’t. And for what? To say something weird.”

Yachi doesn’t know the weight of it. Doesn’t even begin to understand the threat, the implication. Yachi doesn’t even know how the ‘him’ is supposed to be. So she really doesn’t get how disconcerting those facts are. She contemplates, for a moment, slamming her head into the keyboard in front of her.

“Whatever,” she decides ultimately. “I’m just going to ignore it and hopefully absolutely nothing will come of it. It’s how I deal with most of my problems.”

“Oh, what a coincidence, me too,” Yachi laughs, and then stands. “I gotta go. Jameson accidentally downloaded malware onto his computer trying to claim a Target gift card. Have fun rewriting your articles.”

“See you for lunch?” she calls after Yachi’s retreating form.

“Yep!” Yachi confirms with a wave of her hand, disappearing down the line of small, cramped cubicles.

With one, deep, calming breath, she returns her attention to the desktop in front of her. She stretches her neck to the left, and then to the right, and prepares for another day of endless bullshit.

Ding!

YOU HAVE ONE NEW MESSAGE.

taglist: @wyrcan @causenessus @seroh @19calicos @w4nyoung @soulfullystarry @chocolains @jaynawayna @baylz @vuntysharck @mollyrolls @boooolame @staileykout @angee444 @kameyyy @choerry-picking @giocriedpower @sunakeiji @sleepzyy @lunasfics @thecoolestlia @yoshit-he-dinosaur @bectoshi @thatonecroc @karasyuu @iatethemochi @itsdragonius @syverse @savemebrazilhinata @localgaytrainwreck @snail-squasher @atzixo @ahdbodhr @nbcvs @dailyakira @kasumiixs @s1ckntw1st3d @noble-17 @atsumuenthusiast @jino0ix @boobilater @keeboismine @scxrcherr @acowboykisser @impatienscush @loverlunaire @oneiratxxia10 @kattiscrying @dazqa @termite-joe @quikhs @cupidsblonde @izukuwus @greninjafan5000 @mplesyrup

[yncoreee]

CAN WE SKIP TO THE GOOD PART. Eunchae x reader

Synopsis — she can’t help with the constant teasing and flirting… well maybe she will now that chaewon has eyes on her

Warnings .ᐟ chaewon is really overprotective they have one short kiss, this is prop not all, Requested

꩜ — ⵌWord count 986

Eunchae still doesn’t know how and why she had gotten closer to you. over the past few weeks.

There was just something about you that pulled her like a magnet, the moment she laid eyes on you in the company’s building.

She couldn’t resist the constant flirting and teasing every time she met you. You were just too cute to not be babied nor teased.

Today was like the usual, lesserafim had been practicing all day, working on routines and all.

Eunchae decided to sneakily leave the practice room with the excuse of “getting some refreshments” which was obviously a lie. She was on her way to look for you.

She thought of going back, losing hopes. She was having a feeling that you didn’t come today. Until she bumped into a smaller figure.

“So sor— mmm if it isn’t the cutest girl in this building” she said with a small smirk as she helped you up from the floor.

Playfully, you rolled your eyes dusting the dirt away from your clothes. “You really suck at trying to get me flustered” you responded but couldn’t hold back a smile that tugged the corner of your lips.

“What?? I’m just telling the truth” she shrugged innocently leaning against the wall.

“Yeah right” you said with sarcasm. “Jeez, is that why you’ve been following me around like a lost puppy?” You pointed out raising an eyebrow at the taller girl.

“Oh and what if I just like you?” She asked pushing her body away from the wall, taking small steps towards you.

“You’re crazy” you rolled your eyes, playfully pushing her away. Eunchae let out a low chuckle “Yeah right. Crazy for you”. She smirked, leaning down. Of course she wasn’t going to get away that easily.

You felt your breath hitch and your heart beating faster the closer her face seemed to get to yours. Was she…..trying to kiss you.

No idea. You had absolutely no idea what she’s up to. But something about the way she stares at your lips just draws you closer to her.

Just as the gap between your lips were a mere inches apart a loud gasp was heard from behind.

“WHAT THE HECK IS HAPPENING HERE?!” Your body felt stiff after hearing the familiar voice.

Eunchae stepped away from you, like she had been caught red handed. “I-i chaewon u-unnie?” She managed to stutter, averting her gaze everywhere but the angry leader's face. Which probably looked red and on the verge of exploding.

“What the hell were you thinking of doing to my sister” she spoke through gritted teeth, eyeing the younger girl who, even though was 5cm taller, felt so small under her threatening gaze.

You stood in between them more specifically on eunchae’s side. Ready to protect her from what your sister could possibly pull next.

Eunchae on the other hand was completely baffled. She blinked multiple times at the new found information. “W-wait sister?!”

Chaewon let out a frustrated sigh. “Yes sister. Are you that dumb? Don’t you see the resemblance?!” She yelled the last part like it was the most obvious thing on earth.

“Ack!! Unnie I swear I didn’t know. I never knew! It’s just I like her soooo much, she gives me butterflies in my tummy!! I couldn’t help myself. I promise I won’t ever mess with her again!!” Eunchae pleaded practically kneeling on the ground for chaewon.

“Shut up and stop crying!” ….. “but do you seriously like her?” Chaewon asked. Her expression slowly softened.

“Yes!! I really really like her!” Eunchae nodded her head rapidly as she pulled your hands closer but immediately let go as soon as she noticed the scowl on Chaewon’s face.

Your heart felt like it was running a marathon as you glanced over at the eunchae who was being confident and teasing some minutes ago.

Chaewon closed her eyes, processing the girls words with a skeptical look. “YOU!” She opened her eyes pointing at you. “You like her back huh?”

You came back to reality closing your mouth. “Yes, I really really like her” you answered, nodding your head.

Seeing the skepticism in Chaewon’s eyes eunchae could feel her heart pounding as the pressure only increased. “Unnie I swear I’ll treat her right! I’ll be her forever love, I’ll—“

“Shut it” chaewon held up her index finger to silence the nervous girl.

She sighed finally coming to a conclusion after what seemed like ages. “Fine, I'll give you just one chance. And if you hurt her! I’ll make you decrease in height” chaewon threatened with a stern warning.

Eunchae gulped feeling intimidated by Chaewon’s facial expressions. “I promise” she whispered quietly.

“Good!” Chaewon huffed angrily stomping her foot away but came back to give another warning. “And NO kissing okay?!” She peeped her head from the wall, using her index and middle finger to point to her eyes and back at eunchae. A gesture that meant “I’m watching you”

“Y-yes no kissing” eunchae stuttered.

Eunchae let out a sigh of relief and turned to face you after she heard distant footsteps. “Damn that was hella scary” she admitted leaning against the wall again.

You let out a soft chuckle. “Well at least be happy she even agreed. Chaewon Unnie doesn’t easily agree to thing,It would’ve taken ages” you said acting like it wasn’t that much of a big deal and it was something you were used to.

Eunchae’s eyes widened. “Ages?!! I can’t wait for ages…..” eunchae spoke in a low tone, placing her hands on your waist as she pulls you closer.

She looked around making sure the coast was clear of an angry pupu before finally closing the gap between your lips, placing a short and soft kiss. “I love you y/n” she confessed nuzzling her forehead into yours.

“I love you to—“

“HONG EUNCHAE I THOUGHT I SAID NO KISSING?!!!”

“Uh oh”

[la2yn0va]

Could you do feixiao X Male Reader her finding out about his background he was experimented on to be an super assassin his one of the few survivors that were kidnapped as children (or whatever age if you don't feel comfortable) the kids became extremely dangerous strength, speed and senses off the charts they ended up having their voices removed so they use sign language or write and they aren't able to express any emotions not even body language they are often described as soulless unless they have a special face mask on and if that mask breaks in a fight they go berserk rage mode until the one who broke their mask is unrecognisable the survivors modified their mask so that it's a half mask that works same as the original mask but now people can now see if they can see some emotions like top half mask people can see them smiling or frowning same as the bottom half mask people can see emotions in their eyes

Feixiao always had a crush on you. From your ‘cool and loner’ demeanor, to the way you fight, to your clothes and eyes. She couldn’t help but love everything about you.

And better yet, you’d always beaten her in every competition you two had. From the events that came to the yaoqing, to the battlefield, to the spars you two had, you always beat her. And that made her love you even more.

But then, there was your eyes. Your soulless blank eyes, how your mask only covered your lower face, your stoic and stiff posture. It was concerning how robotic you were.

She noticed how the cloud knights were wary of you, as if they were terrified of you… much like her. Honestly, she hated how they just feared you with no good reason. But… she couldn’t help but desire why you were acting like this.

Why’re you so robotic? Do you only act like that around her? Do you hate her? Hell she didn’t even know what platoon you were in.

So, she digged into your life, your files that the previous general had. And what she found shocked her to her very soul.

Child experimentation, ripped out voices, molded into perfect super assassins. To think general yueyu knew of all these events was…almost unbelievable.

Then she saw writing in red letters ‘If m/n’s mask is broken. Under NO Circumstances should any cloud knight intervene with his wraith besides the general or the shadow company’

The shadow company.. so that was your platoon. Feixiao couldn’t control her shaking legs, the sadness she felt for you was immense. As a general she should’ve known about this right? But… as your friend… did you even consider her a friend?

She put the file back, deciding that she didn’t need to read anything more to understand your life. She swallowed, as the realization slowly crept up on her. The fact that her love would never be reciprocated.

However, she didn’t allow these thoughts to consume her. She can do something, she HAS to do something, she CAN save you, fix you. It’s her responsibility as your general and friend.

She changed her entire personality around you. She isn’t commanding or authoritative when acting as your general. She’s more gentle and loving when being your friend.

Feixiao one day decides to take you on a hang out trip (date) to try and find something you’d like, anything. She takes you to an arcade, movies, the park. Seeing if these child activities would awaken the child that was destroyed all those years ago.

Luckily, her hunch was right. She sees your well trained….your brutally imbued demeanor slowly crack. Your body language was more relaxed, your eyes ever so slightly widened with… joy? Or interest.

At the end of the day, feixiao takes you to a cliff side, where people got to see the best view for stars and a rainbow that was rumored to appear.

Feixiao: Just a little further m/n.

Feixiao said, holding your hand as she softly helps you towards a railing, away from anyone. You didn’t know why she was doing this…but…something about it was…intriguing. Feixiao had done something you and your platoon had accepted. She made one of them…feel. Well, as much as a person can feel after not feeling for hundreds of years.

Feixiao: M/n. Look!

She pointed up, making you look up to see the sky glowing beautifully with artificial stars. The same tingle that you’d been feeling since she’s taken you on this expedition appeared once more. The tingle made your lips quiver positively, your eyes opening further than ever before.

You were so caught up on this tingle that you didn’t notice feixiao staring at you. A smile of joy on her face as her eyes sparkled while looking at him. She decided to play her final card, moving her hand up to caress the visible skin on your face, making you turn and face her.

Feixiao: M/n… I’m gonna try something with you. Can I remove your mask?

Remove…your mask? Why? What could she possibly want to try? Was she gonna…. Crack your mask? As if she read your mind, she spoke.

Feixiao: I’m not gonna damage your mask m/n. I just want to do something to your face. Can I?

Something to your face…? To say you were interested wouldn’t be wrong. A part of you so small, so minuscule, so insignificant had become an annoying itch in your mind, a buzz in your ears that told you to ‘trust her’

The buzz and itch immediately annoyed you, it was so loud, so irritating, so….tempting. So, you nodded and feixiao smiled. She carefully removed your mask. Seeing the scars on your jaw and lips.

Her eyes widened for a second before returning back to those…strange stare with a smile that seemed to tug you closer to her. She caressed your face gently before bringing you in close and… making your lips mush with hers.

The feeling of your lips against hers made something in you begin to tickle and tingle. Your eyes widened a bit more then they normally did this whole day, and for once, your body froze, not knowing how to react. She then removed her lips from your which…left your body with a strange feeling.

Feixiao: I’m sorry m/n…I’m pathetic… I couldn’t hold myself back any longer….i-I love you, m/n.

She said which made your mind put the pieces in place. ‘Loves’ you…? Is that why she did this… she cared? The words she spat out made the buzz grow louder, this time, it seemed to have grown a tentacle or sorts, as you felt your hand lift up to hold her thumb.

Feixiao’s eyes widened at this before smiling, the smile that made your eyes shine once more like they did years ago. But only once. However, desires long thought to have been destroyed from your very soul seemed to return, as her smile made you feel…. Happy.

-The End-

[iamgonnagetyouback]

insecure Jess Mariano trying to rub his relationship with fem!reader in every guys face every chance he gets because he wants to prove that he’s the one for her and doesn’t want her to think there’s a better guy out there for her . She notices his behavior and later reassures him that he’s enough and that he’s the only one for her (+ her saying I love you for the first time 🤭)

𝟷𝚔 || 𝐈𝐍𝐒𝐄𝐂𝐔𝐑𝐈𝐓𝐈𝐄𝐒

♡ ︎ꜱᴜᴍᴍᴀʀʏ: Jess is insecure about you leaving him for someone better.

♡ ︎ᴡᴀʀɴɪɴɢꜱ: Insecure Jess

♡ ︎ꜱʜɪᴘ: Jess Mariano x Reader

Jess’s hand tightens around yours, his thumb brushing across your knuckles, but there’s tension in the way his fingers grip yours. You glance up at him, catching the way his eyes are fixed across the courtyard, narrowed with barely concealed irritation.

You follow his gaze and sigh softly when you see the source of his mood: Tristan. He’s lounging on one of the benches, smirking in your direction as if he’s waiting for you to acknowledge him. Jess notices it every time, and lately, it's been getting under his skin more than usual.

Jess doesn’t waste any time. “Hey, babe,” he says, louder than necessary as he pulls you closer to his side. “You cold? I’ve got your jacket in my bag. Want me to grab it?”

You raise a brow at him. “I’m fine, Jess.”

“Are you sure? I don’t want my girl catching a cold.” He practically spits out the last two words, glaring pointedly at Tristan, who’s pretending not to notice, though you see the twitch of a smirk playing on his lips.

You stifle a sigh, feeling the familiar heat of frustration rising in your chest. This isn’t the first time Jess has done this, and you’ve started to notice a pattern: every time a guy so much as glances your way, Jess is quick to claim you like you might slip through his fingers at any moment.

You tug gently at his hand, pulling him away from the courtyard and out of Tristan’s line of sight. He follows, but the stiffness in his shoulders doesn’t ease up. You walk in silence for a few moments, waiting for him to speak, but when he doesn’t, you stop and turn to face him.

“Jess, what’s going on?”

He shifts, running a hand through his hair, avoiding your eyes. “Nothing,” he mutters, but you can see the tightness in his jaw, the way his foot taps impatiently on the pavement.

“Don’t ‘nothing’ me,” you say softly. “You’ve been acting like this every time we’re around other guys. Like you’re trying to prove something.”

He huffs, looking anywhere but at you. “What do you want me to say? That I don’t like the way they look at you? That I know every guy in this place would line up for a shot if you weren’t with me?”

You blink, taken aback by the frustration lacing his voice. “Jess…”

“Look, I get it, okay?” he cuts in, voice rougher now. “I’m not like them. I’m not some rich kid from Chilton or some golden boy with a perfect future. I’m the guy everyone warns you to stay away from. So, yeah, maybe I’m insecure. Maybe I’m scared you’ll wake up one day and realize you could do better.”

His words hit you hard, and your heart clenches at the vulnerability he’s showing, even if he’s trying to hide it behind his usual tough exterior. You take a step closer, placing a hand on his chest.

“Jess,” you say softly, waiting until he finally meets your gaze. His brown eyes are clouded with doubt, and you can feel the weight of all the things he doesn’t say pressing between you.

“I don’t want anyone else,” you say firmly, holding his gaze. “I want you. Not Tristan. Not anyone else. Just you.”

He doesn’t say anything, his lips pressing into a thin line like he’s waiting for the other shoe to drop.

“And if you think for one second that there’s a ‘better’ guy out there for me, you’re wrong. You’re it, Jess. You’re enough. More than enough.”

You reach up, cupping his face in your hands, brushing your thumbs over his cheekbones. “I love you, Jess. No one else. You.”

His breath hitches, eyes widening as your words sink in. For a moment, he just stares at you, like he’s not sure he heard you right. Then, before you can say anything else, he pulls you into his arms, holding you so tightly it feels like he’s afraid you’ll disappear if he lets go.

“You… you love me?” he murmurs, voice uncharacteristically soft against your hair.

You smile into his chest, squeezing him just as tightly. “Yes, I love you. How many times do I have to say it?”

He pulls back just enough to look at you, and the vulnerability in his eyes is replaced by something softer—relief, maybe, and something else that looks like wonder.

“I love you too,” he whispers, his voice almost reverent, like he can’t quite believe it. Then he kisses you, slow and tender, like he’s pouring all the things he’s too scared to say into that one moment.

When you finally pull away, his forehead rests against yours, and for the first time all day, he seems relaxed. “Sorry for being a jealous idiot.”

You chuckle, brushing a strand of hair from his face. “It’s okay. Just… try to remember that you don’t have to prove anything. I’m not going anywhere.”

He smirks, though there’s still a softness in his eyes. “Good. Because I’m not letting you go.”

taglist: @anawritez-posts

[em-prentiss]

got the music in you, baby (tell me why)

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5 times Aaron wants to dance with Emily, and one time he does.

Music alone had never sparked in him the urge to dance. He’s seen it in many, the spark that would light up their eyes at a good beat, and he’d be envious of the way their bodies moved seemingly naturally to the music. Aware of his own awkwardness, Aaron never joined in, preferring instead to watch from a distance, an imperceptible sway to his shoulders that matched the tune of pounding music.

All this considered, when Aaron spots the ambassador’s daughter—Emily—in a sea of elegantly dressed politicians, her red dress calling out to him like a siren’s song, all he wants to do is twirl her away in time with the smooth jazz.

(Or, 5 times he doesn’t dance with Emily, and one time he does.)

Word count: 7.8k

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1) a ballroom dance

Aaron has never been much of a dancer.

There were the occasions where he had to, of course; he’d danced with Haley at prom, but then it wasn’t really serious. They were laughing and exchanging kisses during the slow dances, doing nothing but rocking occasionally to the music, their arms wrapped around each other as if they were hugging. She’d tried to make him join her for the more upbeat songs but Aaron persisted, the blush on his cheeks concealed by the low lights of the gym as he dug his heels in the floor and convinced her to dance with her friends instead. She’s gone, now—left him with a sheepish smile and the echo of ‘wanting to see what’s out there.’

With her, she took any minimal urges of dancing he’d had nestled deep down.

There were times—when heavily intoxicated, that is—mostly in his college days, when he’d give in and let go, allowing himself to move to the beat of pounding music, too buzzed to be embarrassed at the way his body twisted and turned. He doesn’t like feeling stiff as he moves, awkwardly trying to find a rhythm from the beat, but alcohol more often than not turned his body to liquid, pliant and liable to follow the bass of whatever song was playing.

Music alone had never sparked in him the urge to dance. He’s seen it in many, the spark that would light up their eyes at a good beat, and he’d be envious of the way their bodies moved seemingly naturally to the music. Aware of his own awkwardness, Aaron never joined in, preferring instead to watch from a distance, an imperceptible sway to his shoulders that matched the tune of pounding music.

All this considered, when Aaron spots the ambassador’s daughter—Emily—in a sea of elegantly dressed politicians, her red dress calling out to him like a siren’s song, all he wants to do is twirl her away in time with the smooth jazz.

Her pale hand in his, the darkness of his ill-fitting suit against the perfectly tailored red of her dress. He wants to hear the click of her heels against the marble and her low voice above the music, shimmering with the same amusement that always lingers in her eyes. She’d be more graceful than him, he knows—infinitely so—but Aaron still wants to try twirling her around and bringing her back into his chest with steady fingers on her lower back, her expensive perfume dissolving in a cloud on his tongue.

It’s irrational, the twitch in his hand; he wants to fit it to the curve of her waist, lightly smooth his palm up and down her side to catch the silken material of her dress. It drapes elegantly over her form, cupping her curves with gentle reverence, and amongst the absurdity of his thoughts, it’s not out of place for Aaron to feel jealous of the silk.

Her hair is gathered in an artful twist, exposing the pale skin of her shoulders. She tilts her head and the curve of her throat is strangely enchanting as her eyes skip over the mingling guests, searching, searching, until they find him in the corner. 

Dark irises trap him in place and she’s heading in his direction, gliding across the marble with a newfound set to her jaw. Aaron can’t even look away, his coworkers’ chatter in his comms fading to a low buzz as people part to make way for her.

“Agent Hotchner.” Emily smiles when she reaches him. 

She’d discovered him about a week ago. A fling was being bothersome and Aaron threw him out while she stood on the staircase, bare feet curling around the ledge of the marble steps as she stared after them. Since then he’s been more or less the center of her attention, seemingly always posted wherever she’s lingering.

She’s certainly…entertaining.

“Miss Prentiss.” He replies with a nod. Up close it’s even harder to look away, his eyes drawn to the subtle shimmer kissing her skin. She glows, in a room of dull people, more brightly than she had before.

“Care to dance?” She asks, blissfully unaware of the turmoil in his head. 

You have no idea. 

Still, Aaron arches a brow.

Emily smiles ruefully. “Everyone here is either over the age of fifty or is going to leave me with desperately sore toes.” Her nose scrunches up and Aaron bites back a smile at the sulk on her lips, exaggerated but traced with some shred of genuity. It’s not uncommon for her to be complaining about something or the other, but as his eyes skip over the well-dressed guests—half of them indeed looking to be her father’s age—he thinks she can’t be faulted for griping about this.

Aaron clears his throat. “I’m afraid I’m no better than any of them,” he says, suddenly wishing his suit was more tailored, more formal, less visibly shabby. The gun on his hip is heavy and he wants it gone along with the wire curling around his neck. It’s laughable; his dancing skills have hardly evolved since his high school prom, but Aaron thinks he can learn to follow the curve of her body, let her lead him through a waltz with her fingers pressing into his arm. “Your toes wouldn’t thank me, and that’s me being generous.”

Emily’s eyes sparkle. “Ah, but at least you’re pretty to look at.”

Before the blush can spread to his ears, her mother is there, a tight smile on her lips as she grips Emily’s elbow.

“Emily.” The low hiss of her voice is audible in the small distance between them. Emily’s smile fades instantly; the ambassador doesn’t spare Aaron a second glance. He straightens and shuffles back further against the wall as Emily rolls her eyes, the pinch returning to her mouth as her mother continues whispering in her ear. Aaron feels her eyes slide to him, her gaze hot, but he fixes his on the crowd as Elizabeth lets go of her elbow and walks past them, apparently done with her reprimanding. 

Emily clears her throat. “I’ll save you a dance.” She smiles; polite, infinitely dimmer than her bright grin seconds ago.

It’s an empty promise, one he knows she can’t fulfill—at least not between these people, in this ballroom—and yet Aaron still holds out hope, despite all the rationings in his head.

“I look forward to it.”

2) a dance he shouldn’t want 

The Super bowl weekend comes and he’s nestled in a dark bar under strobing lights, his wife on one side and the still-puzzling enigma that is Emily on the other.

He’d been more than surprised to see her in his office with a box on her hip and a professionally painted smile on her lips, stiff and frozen as if he was one of the politicians at her mother’s parties. In hindsight, Aaron supposes it’s fair—they’d known each other for less than two weeks, with nothing but meaningless flirting weaving its way through their brief conversations. Maybe she hadn’t thought of him like he thought of her, in the dead of night and the mind numbing silence of a stakeout and the brief times his mind would wander to the increasingly distant past.

And now she’s here, with her arms bare and her hair tumbling in soft, obsidian curls that just brush her shoulders. 

And it doesn’t matter that she’s here, because he’s married. Because she’s no longer the same young woman who easily flirted at him whenever they spoke, and he’s no longer the freshly green security guard who’d flirt back when boredom was eating its way through his brain. 

At least that’s what he keeps telling himself.

Dimples curve in her cheeks as she hands him and Haley their drinks, the vibrant lights of the bar reflecting in her eyes when she looks at him with an easy smile. It’s enchanting, the way pinks and purples swirl into a backdrop of brown so dark it’s almost black, pupils entirely indistinguishable from irises. 

Aaron has to remind himself that he likes blue.

There’s a second where their fingers touch—a brush there and gone between one blink and the other. Aaron doesn’t get to linger on it before Emily pulls away, her pale hand wrapping around her own drink. She doesn’t look at him, doesn’t react as she turns to Penelope and says something to her, the waves of her hair contrasting with the pink-tinted skin of her arm.

His skin burns with something hot, the condensation on his glass doing nothing to cool it. A similar, uncomfortable heat flares in his stomach and Aaron swallows, nudging his thigh against Haley’s in an attempt to distinguish it. Haley nudges his thigh back and asks Emily something, but he isn’t listening as he brings his beer to his lips. 

Her perfume lingers on the rim of the glass. 

It tips into his mouth, threading through the beer in small, bitter traces, and Emily’s answer is static in his ears. Aaron swallows just quickly enough to narrowly avoid choking, a burn in his throat as he sets his glass down. He ducks his head and coughs into his elbow, stifling his curse in the wool of his quarter zip. The itch in his trachea makes his eyes water and he inhales, trying to soothe it with the cold air.

“Hey, are you okay?” Haley rubs between his shoulder blades.

“Fine.” Aaron rasps.

His eyes lift to the opposite end of the table, searching for Emily, but he doesn’t find her there.

She’s in Morgan’s arms. Her beer is discarded on the table; between one second and the next, he’s abandoned the crowd of women around him and pulled Emily into their midst.

Emily easily accommodates Morgan’s lecherous dancing. She rolls her hips, her mouth moving as she says something over the music. He’s bold, his hands reaching for her waist, and she’s eager, looping her arms around his neck. Emily tosses her head back, silken hair catching the lights, and her shirt rises up as she moves to the beat. Delicate skin is exposed, pale beneath startlingly dark ink that cups her hip in a way his hand itches to. 

Heat gathers above the collar of his fleece.

Between flashes of pearly teeth and grabbing hands and rolling hips, Aaron’s stomach starts to churn. This is a far cry from the elegant waltzes he’s seen her dance before, and he inexplicably wants to shove Morgan away and take his place, rest his own hand on her waist and dip his fingers in the back pocket of her jeans. He wants to dance with her like that even though it’s been years—a decade—since he’s been to a rave, but he’s sufficiently buzzed now, wants to feel the outline of her body between his arms.

Instead he grabs Haley’s hand, tangles his fingers with hers and speaks through the treacherous rasp in his throat. “They don’t seriously call that dancing, do they? C’mon Hales, let’s show them how it’s done.”

She’s delighted, of course, only too well remembering the times she’d had to drag him to the dance floor. The churning in Aaron’s stomach intensifies at Haley’s soft hand in his, their wedding bands clinking together just before she lets go and starts to dance, as easily as she always does whenever the music hits her.

He tries to move with her, he does—holding her closer than normal and feeling the heat of her body though her clothes—but then he tilts his chin above the blonde head right in front of him and he sees her, a complete opposite of the woman in his arms. Two of Morgan’s fingers are under her shirt now, hiding the ink, and he’s grateful when another couple comes into view and blocks them from his sight.

As Aaron catches Haley’s beaming smile between twirls, he feels in the pit of his stomach that he’s fucked. 

3) a dance in the rain

Sweeping his gaze over the bullpen is habitual whenever he leaves his office. The lights are on despite it only being noon; charcoal gray clouds have gathered thickly in the sky, hiding the sun behind them, and it doesn’t look like it’ll surface anytime soon. Morgan is diligently bent over his stack of paperwork and Reid is visible near the coffee machine—pouring a mountain of sugar in his mug—but a certain blonde-brunette pair is missing. 

They’re probably in Garcia’s office, Aaron tells himself as he heads to Dave’s door, trying to stop his eyes from wandering to the glass doors. He’s not nosy; at least he doesn’t think he is. 

Keeping tabs on his team at all times is habit, really.

Just as his hand wraps around Dave’s door handle, he spots a blonde crossing the conference room. JJ’s voice carries over the chaos of the storm and Aaron lets go of the handle, finding himself continuing forward instead. 

The file in his hand rustles with his pace, distantly reminding him that his destination was a few steps back. Thunder cracks, and as he gets closer, he hears her murmur to JJ, “I’d love to dance.”

Emily’s voice is wistful. 

Frowning, Aaron peeks into the conference room. She almost presses her nose against the glass, the soft puffs of her breath forming clouds on the window. The rain falls in thick sheets, turning Quantico into a gray blur outside; the way Emily looks at it makes it seem beautiful.

“In that?” JJ’s tone is incredulous, but it’s still soft as she leans next to her, peering into the downpour.

Aaron doesn’t judge her skepticism; he hardly sees the appeal of getting soaked to the bone and having to deal with the uncomfortable aftermath. But then he looks at Emily and he sees the shimmer to her eyes, a light that had been diminished these past few days courtesy of a brutal case in Texas, and while he still doesn’t get it he thinks if she went out in the storm he’d follow her. Offer his hand, let the rain soak it in the time she takes it and maybe links her fingers with his.

Thunder rumbles and it’s easy to imagine; feeling the water slip through their intertwined palms, hearing her laugh, joyful and free—because he’s heard that one before, he knows what it sounds like—drowned out by the downpour. She would undoubtedly slip on the pavement as she tried to spin, and he would catch her with hardly steadier hands. Maybe they would crash, backward on the floor, or maybe his oxfords would provide just enough grip and he’d hold them both upright.

Even through the walls, the rain is loud as it slams against the pavement. 

It’s not so harsh a soundtrack. More forgiving than the tune of a song, a gentle thumping that won’t judge his graceless movements. Aaron thinks he could easily move with her to the rhythmless patter of rain on the sidewalk, the roiling of thunder above. Flashes of lighting would reflect in her eyes and he’d feel the same electricity in his heart when she’d look at him with rain soaked lashes, water beading on the tips of them and falling to her cheeks when she blinks.

The wind screeches, Emily sticks herself closer to the window, and Aaron thinks he’s ready to go out into the downpour, let it soak his suit and drench her hair and make her bangs stick to her brows, let it swallow up the sound of his voice as he asked her to dance. It would hide the tremor in it, he thinks; the uncertainty that comes with trying to be casual with her outside of work.

There’s nothing stopping him now. Nothing except the fact that he’s her superior and the tan line around his ring finger that has just started to even out.

“Don’t knock it till you’ve tried it.” Emily murmurs, snapping Aaron out of his rain-blurred fantasy. “It can be…” She trails off, draws her lip between her teeth, and he’s sure the file in his hand crumples, “Grounding. Oddly enough.” 

Emily crosses her arms as she thoughtfully looks out the window, her eyes tracing the droplets of rain. He should tell them to get back to work, but their forms are weary from the case they came back from last night, and if they can’t find respite in the brief minutes of their lunch break, Aaron thinks they won’t find it anywhere else.

“You still have thirty minutes,” he finds himself saying. 

Emily and JJ jump. 

Aaron bites his tongue too late.

They turn to him, startled, their eyes narrowing at him almost synchronously in confusion. Emily’s brow arches in question; before she can ask what the hell he’s doing here—spying on them—Aaron rattles off, “It’s your lunch break and your go bag’s here—I mean, it should be, seeing as we just came back from a case—” That’s besides the point, “Uh, anyway, as long as you’re back here by 1 to hand in your consults and you’re not dripping rainwater where you stand,” he shrugs, “I don’t see a problem with it.”

JJ is looking at him like he’s grown a second head. Emily’s shock is more subdued, but she still sounds skeptical as she hooks a finger through her necklace and asks, “You don’t think it’s unprofessional?”

It’s what you need.

Aaron fights the urge to shrug again. “I think it’s human.” He says.

It’s subtle, the way her expression shifts to surprise. Dark eyes just about swallow him whole; Aaron wonders if he’s just given himself away, wholly and undeniably. 

He needs to get out of there.

“Just don’t be late.” He can only pray his voice doesn’t sound as soft to their ears as it sounds to his.

He doesn’t think it’s the right answer, but he doesn’t linger enough to know. Aaron turns on his heel and steadfastly makes his way to Dave’s office—where he should’ve been in the first place. There’s the sharp clicks of heels on the floor behind him as JJ and Emily walk out of the conference room.

Their eyes are hot on the nape of his neck. Aaron fights the urge to walk faster, and when he reaches Dave’s door, he pushes it open without pausing to knock.

Twenty three minutes later he’s back in his office and Emily knocks on his open door, wearing a different shirt but the same blazer, her makeup flawless and her hair damp. Aaron very deliberately chooses not to notice the way this one hugs her body more tightly than her button down had, sliding his gaze away from the pale v of skin down her chest. He meets her eyes instead; they’re bright beneath her wavy bangs, the light he’d been waiting for turned on again. Something in him loosens.

Emily offers him a smile as she hands him her neatly written consult.

“You had seven more minutes.” Aaron says as he takes it.

She raises her shoulder in a delicate shrug. “Didn’t want to push it.”

Aaron has a sinking suspicion that even if she did, he’d have let it slide. He nods, grateful that she didn’t, and instead of simply leaving, Emily perches on the arm of the chair across from his desk. 

“You could’ve come with.” She says casually. Her tone is genuine and she’s smiling at him and he doesn’t know what it means, if she’s meaning it the way she does with everyone else or if it’s special, just for him. Because no one else does this—offers to dance with him in the rain, touches him as frequently as she does, cracks jokes to him even though she knows he won’t laugh.

Is it casual or not, normal or not, platonic or not. Is he too desperate for company—her company—or does she really see him as more than a friend, more than a boss.

He’s losing his mind trying to figure her out.

“I don’t like getting wet.” Is what he manages in the end, the dryness in the back of his throat forcing the words to come out clipped.

Emily doesn’t seem too bothered by it. She presses her lips together, dimples gathering in her cheeks. “That’s a shame.”

When she stands, she stirs up a soft whoosh of air smelling of summer rain. “Anything else you need?” She tucks a lock of hair behind her ear. It shifts from its place; Aaron spots the damp patch it left behind on her shirt.

“Just the case reports.”

Emily nods. She turns and walks away, and the words tumble from his mouth just as she reaches the door.

“If you catch a cold don’t come whining about it.”

She doesn’t pause, but her voice is distinctly indignant. “I never whine.” 

Aaron finds himself smiling at her retreating figure.

4) a dance to her own music

She’s kicked off her heels a long time ago, now sitting cross legged on the piano bench—because of course David Rossi owns a fucking grand piano. She’s been toying with the keys for a while now, a far away look in her eyes as she thumbs at the smooth ivory.

The strap of her satin blouse slips off one shoulder, and if Aaron didn’t already have confirmation that he’s falling, the gallop in his heart when she fixes it with one absent finger is all the answer he needs.

“Are you just gonna look pretty there all night or will you play us something, Prentiss?”

Her lips curl up as Morgan brings her back to the present.

“Aw, Morgan, you think I’m pretty?” Her voice lilts teasingly, the same wine-dark silk of her blouse.

“You’re easy on the eyes,” he jibes back, and as soft laughter rises around them, Aaron feels suddenly envious of their easy banter. He unlocks his jaw by bringing his glass to his lips and forcing himself to swallow, though he hardly needs to be more intoxicated with her in the room, looking like that.

It’s dangerous, the casualness of her posture and the softness of her hair. Her wine glass resting precariously on the glossy piano, his soft button down tracing his skin, the base of his throat exposed to the same air she’s breathing in and out. Lines blur, more than they have already, and Aaron’s not sure he can keep his composure for much longer.

“Have any sheet music?” Emily turns to Dave, her fingers absently trailing over the piano keys.

Dave gestures vaguely with his hand. “Make something up.”

A soft scoff escapes past her lips. “Of course you’d have a piano but not music. Show off. You don’t know how to play this thing at all, do you?” 

By some accident, her eyes meet Aaron’s. They’re dark as ever, glinting in the low lights with all too familiar amusement. Emily’s lips curve and something happens, too quick for him to fully catch—the flutter of her lashes against her cheek, wrinkled lines around her right eye.

It leaves him with a similar flutter in his chest.

Aaron catches her dimple as she turns away. Her teeth bite down on her bottom lip; Emily stares through the piano and Aaron doesn’t understand what just happened, only that something did.

He raises the glass to his lips again.

“It’s popular with the ladies.” Dave protests, but his voice is drowned out by the notes of the piano as Emily tests them out. 

She toys with it for a while, a small crease between her brows that Aaron wants to smooth out with his thumb. He grips his glass tighter and Emily’s frown clears, determination taking over as her fingers press down on the keys with surety.

He doesn’t know what she plays, if it’s a legitimate piece or something of her own. It’s slow and entirely unfit for dancing, he’s sure, and yet he still wants to take her hand and lift her up from the bench, thread his fingers through hers and dance to the melody of her own music. Aaron imagines her bare feet slipping on the plush threads of Dave’s Persian carpet, the richness of her surprised laugh as she tumbles into his chest. He would steady her with a confident hand on her waist and her arm would loop around his neck; maybe she’d slip the tips of her fingers into his hair, maybe their chests would press together and he’d feel her inhale.

He’s learned since he’d wanted to slow dance with her last. He’d danced at his wedding, gone to a few classes Haley had signed them up for on his free weekends. Aaron knows he’d wrap his hands around her waist with certainty, hold her fingers between his own and know when to twirl her, when to dip, even though the tune she’s playing is hardly fit for anything more than swaying.

If his calculations are right, her forehead would just brush his jaw. She’s shorter now that her heels are tossed away; it’s an unexpected difference but one that feels scarily intimate, like the knowledge that if they both surged forward and met in the middle, his lips would press against her temple.

It’s ridiculous how much he wants to do that.

Maybe he wants to press a kiss to her lips, too. They’re a faded red, lipstick softly smudged from repeatedly pressing her lips to the rim of her wine glass. Plush and inviting and—

“Beethoven,” Reid exclaims, his eyes lighting up. Aaron is firmly back on the couch, rooted to the cushions despite the urge in his gut to get up and move to the piano. 

“Moonlight sonata, first movement.” He says confidently. His voice pitches higher like it always does when he’s excited.

Emily nods. “Very good, handsome,” she drawls, briefly looking up to flash him a smile. Though Reid undoubtedly knew he was correct, her praise brightens his smile.

“I didn’t know you could play.” He says.

“I didn’t know you could identify classical pieces from just a few notes.” She replies, a proud glint in her eyes. “That’s impressive.”

“He listens to them before bed,” Morgan playfully knuckles his hair. Reid shoves him away as Garcia and JJ laugh. Aaron can’t get himself to join in, still hung up on the soft tenderness of handsome.

“They help me sleep,” he grumbles, fixing his hair before tucking it behind his ear. “Can you play Claire de Lune?” The words are clumsy as they fall from his lips, but Emily nods again.

“Yep,” she pops the p. “Only if you get me the sheet music, though. I’m more rusty on that one.”

“Do you know it also means—”

“Moonlight, yeah, so actually—”

“—there’s two moonlight sonatas.” They say in unison. Emily’s hands pause on the keys and her music fades as she laughs, one sweet melody falling down and the other picking up where it left off. Aaron’s lips twitch at the familiar sound.

“Even though technically Claire de Lune isn’t even a sonata, really, it’s the third movement of the Debussy’s Suite Bergamasque which has four—”

The words become static in his ears as Emily’s smile widens, her eyes bright as she nods along even though he’s sure Reid’s lost her. Something tightens in his chest and Aaron wonders if he’ll slowly grow to envy every person to ever make her smile. He closes his eyes and tips back what’s rest of his scotch, shoving down the urge to get up and ask her that one simple question that’s haunted him for years now.

He’s losing his goddamn mind.

5) a dance in the midst of the chaos

Jack’s birthday party is livelier than he would have dreamed of a year ago, when he was drowning in grief and trying to claw his way out. His head is still barely above the water, but things like this make it easier.

Since four o’clock his apartment has been turned upside down, and for the first time that Aaron can remember, he welcomes the chaos. Garcia comes with goodie bags and a merry playlist and face paints, Reid with magic tricks up his sleeves and down his pockets. Rossi and JJ show up with food, Emily and Morgan grace his doorstep with light jokes and easy banter.

And his boy is laughing. He’s laughing and running around with Henry and they’re almost tripping over the toys littering the living room, palpable love from his team crowding the already small space. JJ calls for them to slow down and Aaron smiles at the echo of voices and giggles, precious sounds he never held out hope for hearing in a place like this.

He thought he’d feel some lingering awkwardness at brining them into his house, but if it exists it’s quick to dissipate with the kids’ delight, with the adults’ desire to make it last. JJ and Emily crowd his kitchen, Garcia adds to his sparse and—in comparison—pathetic decorations, and as Rossi serenades the kids with some story he’s sure he doesn’t want to know the contents of, the apartment properly feels like home.

Throughout it all, Aaron feels overwhelmed with love. 

Nobody here has ever said it—at least not to him—but it spills from them and their actions and their laughter. The careful way Emily counts out six candles and the precision with which JJ pokes them into the cake. The way Garcia plops a paper crown on Jack’s head, the way they all sing happy birthday at the top of their lungs and cheer when Jack blows out the candles, his grin wide and toothy and everything Aaron thought he’d never be able to give him.

Maybe this counts as fulfilling his promise.

In the living room, Emily cuts Jack’s chocolate cake and hands thick slices to everyone on flimsy paper plates; Jack gets the first slice, the biggest and most chocolatey piece of cake that he immediately sinks his face into.

When the turn comes to him, Aaron tries to decline.

“I’m not a huge fan of chocolate,” he says quietly.

Emily presses the plate more insistently into his hand, the edges of it curling up against his chest. “Do it for the birthday boy,” she whispers. “One slice won’t kill you, Hotch.” Her free hand cups his around the edge of the plate, fingers curling around his wrist with a squeeze.

His skin burns, even though her hand is cold. 

“Okay.” Aaron manages with a croak, hoping she’d let go of him before she feels his racing pulse through his wrist. Emily smiles, small but triumphant as she lets him go. “Only if you take one, too.” He rasps, wondering if he’s imagining the cold that sinks into his hand.

“Oh, are you kidding?” She says as she turns back to the cake and grabs the chocolate covered knife. “I’m taking two.”

Seeing her with a plate of—two—cake slices balanced on her crossed legs, sitting on the threadbare rug in his living room and surrounded by the bright energy of his son, Aaron thinks she looks sickeningly in place. 

He’s in the kitchen, trying to clear the image from his mind when Jack’s laughter flows in. It’s been a common sound these past few hours, but Aaron still peers through the open plan kitchen and into the living room, his heart briefly stumbling at the scene in front of him.

Jack is in Emily’s arms, both of them laughing as she spins them around. Gift wrapping paper litters the floor, confetti is dug deep into the rug between Emily’s socked feet, and Jack’s paper crown slips down his forehead as she bounces him around, attempting a graceless dance. They hardly move at all, one single lump attached from hip to shoulder, but they’re a mess of giggles and pink cheeks.

An inelegant dance. A dance for the joy of closeness rather than moving to the beat of a song. It makes his breath catch, his hands pause on the counter.

They twirl to the melody of their own laugher and Aaron’s heart aches with the desire to join them. To wrap his arms around them both, share Jack’s weight across his shoulder and free Emily’s hip from his son’s heft. His arm would encircle each waist and the world would be held between his fingertips for a fleeting moment.

It would hardly be a dance—no more than a mess of elbows and two left feet aimlessly moving about—but the comfort of having them both close would be more than enough. Maybe he would catch Emily’s grin and feel her own arm slide around his waist, bringing him and Jack so close their bodies bump together; soft arches against his sharpened edges.

He can almost taste it, just across the kitchen counter.

“It’s not wrong,” Dave says, suddenly appearing next to his elbow and breaking him out of his wishful fantasy, “for you to want this.”

Aaron swallows down the hard lump in his throat. He looks down and focuses on wiping the chocolate from the countertop, ignoring the heat of Dave’s eyes on him. Emily’s laugh carries; his heart both aches and swells at the sound.

It’s not wrong. Could it be, when it’s something as pure as this?

By the time he actually realizes that, it’s much too late.

+1 (finally; a slow dance)

The opportunity presents itself. 

JJ’s wedding is the last thing he could’ve possibly expected after a fiasco like yesterday’s, but it’s here and Emily is here and it’s finally an acceptable setting in which it’d be weirder for him not to ask her to dance than if he did.

Aaron’s hands start to dampen with sweat; he wipes them on his slacks before approaching Emily. She’s standing quietly next to one of the buffet tables, toying with the stem of her champagne glass as she looks through the dancing couples. Only when she’s close enough to touch does she look up and give him a small smile, fairy lights reflecting in her eyes.

Now or never.

“Would you like to dance?” Aaron—finally—asks, his voice quiet as he holds out his hand. His eyes trace over her face, closely looking for signs of rejection, but she doesn’t give any.

Emily sets down her glass and wordlessly takes his hand. It’s soft, just like he’d imagined it would be, but he didn’t account for the rougher calluses on her fingertips. That alone cements the fact that this is real, not yet another one of his many daydreams.

They find their way to the dance floor and Aaron’s hand goes to her waist. His palm flattens around the soft curve hidden beneath her dress, the satin slipping under his skin with a low whisper.

Emily sways easily with him, following the lines of his body wherever he takes her. She’s quiet, withdrawn in that unusual way she’s been since she got back, and for the first time in ever, Aaron hates her silence. 

He promised himself. After the chaos of Jack’s party and the whirlwind that tore through Emily’s life, he promised himself that if he ever got to see her again he’d somehow ask her to dance. He wanted to promise himself to tell her something else, too. Something consisting of three tiny words and a buildup simmering for years.

But he could hardly make himself that promise knowing he’ll never keep it.

“You know…” Aaron begins, swallowing when Emily cocks her head to show she’s listening, “I’ve wanted to do this for years.”

The confession is soft; it echoes in the warm space between their bodies. Aaron wonders if she knows there’s a piece of his heart in these few words.

“Go to a wedding?” Emily murmurs.

He thinks she must be joking, but the absent look in her eyes says she’s not here with him. Panic sparks in his chest, ice cold water running through his veins. 

He’s losing her.

Aaron subconsciously tightens his grip on her hand. “Dance with you.” He says, the words tumbling out too quick and desperate.

That snaps her out of it.

“…Years?” Emily echoes. Her brows furrow, the fog in her eyes clearing. “How many years?” She whispers.

Heat travels up his collar. Aaron clears his throat, making a point of not shying away from her eyes when he says, “Embarrassingly many.” 

Emily tilts her head. “Care to give me a number?”

He laughs, soft and tasting bitter in the back of his throat. Emily’s hand twitches in his and he rubs his thumb over her knuckles, almost absently. 

She’s been in his life, some way or another, for over a decade. Always just out of reach, some persistent, invisible barrier keeping him from her. Or maybe it’s just his own cowardice.

“Mm, 15 years,” he murmurs, and her eyes widen. “Give or take.”

Suddenly she’s here with him, more present than she’s been in a long time. Aaron feels the heat of her attention, heavy and demanding.

“Why—” Her voice croaks and she falters, both her words and her steps. Her feet halt; Aaron gently nudges her lower back, the tips of his fingers reaching the pearls of her spine. Emily starts moving again. “Why didn’t you?”

His hand slides down her waist to wrap around her right hip. There’s ink here, he knows. Aaron rubs his thumb over it absently, almost trying to feel it through her dress.

“I was a coward.” He breathes out, looking away from Emily and focusing instead on the warmth of her body against his. She’s perfect, nothing less than what he’d imagined, and Aaron files away the feeling for later. A twist in his gut tells him he won’t get to do this again. “I still am. I mean…why would you ever want to dance with me?” Aaron shrugs; Emily’s fingers curl into his jacket. “At least here you were less likely to say no.”

Her nails dig into the back of his hand. The sting almost loosens something in his shoulders—at least this could last longer than she does. 

“I never would’ve said no,” Emily says, “if you would’ve asked.” 

Her eyes are hot, so hot on his skin. Piercing and sharp; he’s missed that intensity, spent seven months praying for it back, and not in vain. But maybe he’ll relive that cycle all over again, and this time she won’t be as quick to come back.

A lump forms in the back of his throat. Distantly, he’s aware of the song ending, but neither he nor Emily pay attention to it as they glide across the floor. He tries to focus on that—on the places where their bodies touch, the way her perfume floods his mouth when he spins her and it carries in the air—but all he’s thinking of is time lost, and chances taken too late.

Emily’s fingers slot between his. The hand on his back slips under his jacket and fuck, he’s always thought of touching her but never of her touching him. The weight of her gaze is almost a touch in itself, the way fire trails across his cheeks in the form of obsidian-dark eyes. 

Aaron clears his throat, his voice low when he says, “The last time I wanted to ask you to dance was just before I lost you. And…I feel like I’m about to lose you again.” He rasps, his tone pleading even to his ears as he squeezes her hand. “Am I, Emily?”

Panic flares in her eyes.

Emily tugs her hands away and Aaron’s heart sinks. The skin of his back is left cold, the inside of his palm achingly empty. “Please,” he whispers, but he doesn’t even know what he’s pleading for.

“I need some water,” she says shakily, the excuse more for their friends around them than for him—an explanation for why he’s suddenly standing alone as Emily walks back into the house, wrapping her shawl tighter around her body.

Aaron watches her go and his heart drops to the floor. Instantly his brain supplies him with memories he never wants to relive; Emily’s empty chair on the jet and her cleared out desk and her badge in his drawer, the laminated shine of her smile the only thing he had left of her. His heart remembers the ache, his eyes remember the burn of tears.

He’s moving after her before he can stop himself.

Aaron doesn’t feel Dave and Morgan’s stares as he disappears inside, long strides taking him to the kitchen. His thumb traces over his index finger in quick intervals, his heart picking up as if he’s afraid he’ll find empty space in the kitchen instead of the woman he’s been in love with for years.

But she’s there, leaning against the counter with her head in her hands.

“Emily.”

Her name escapes in a rush; quick and breathless. She looks up and he sees the rapid movement of her chest, fluttering like a bird’s.

His heart twists painfully.

“Would you still want to dance with me?” She asks, her lip trembling, her eyes shiny with more than the glint of the lights above. It takes his breath away, how everything she’s been hiding so quickly rises to the surface. “After everything?” Her voice shakes almost imperceptibly.

Aaron walks closer to her. When he’s close enough to see the frantic pulse in her throat, he tentatively cups her cheek. 

Emily doesn’t back away; he lets out a quiet breath. 

“Wake up, sweetheart.” He says softly, his thumb skimming her jaw. “I always want to dance with you. I would say I’ve been waiting for you for to say yes, but we both know—”

Her lips are on his.

Aaron inhales sharply and there it is, that plush bottom lip finally in between his own. He tastes lingering traces of champagne and desperation, the ash from yesterday still clinging to her mouth. It’s been building up for a while now, but that look in her eyes started taking form last night, when she was staring down at her desk with her clothes still stained in soot.

The hand that slides into his hair breaks him from his frozen state. Emily grips the strands and his arm wraps around her waist, holding her to his chest as he kisses her back. Her lips are shaky, her hands unsteady, but Aaron thinks his might be just the same.

“Emily,” he murmurs when the breath is sucked from their lungs. He’s just far enough away to know that her eyes are closed, her trembling breaths skipping over his mouth as she twirls his hair around her finger. Aaron squeezes her waist and her eyes flutter open, endless brown briefly stealing his breath away again.

“Hey. Don’t go.” He breathes. One of the hands on her waist travels up, between their bodies, to cup her cheek again. “Please.” God, how many times is he going to beg tonight?

Emily sucks in a breath. 

“How did you know I wanted to?” She asks, tugging on his hair. Aaron is too close to imagine the shine on her lashes.

“I know you, Emily.” He whispers. “You think no one does, but we do. I do. Some parts of you are hidden, yes, but for the most part…we know you.” His thumb roves over her soft cheek, feeling it when she inhales shakily. It travels to the corner of her mouth and he gives her a small smile. “And I think I know this particular habit of yours especially well.”

A sniffled laugh escapes past her lips. A thrill goes through him at the accomplishment, even when Emily hides her small smile in the crook of his neck. “You know I didn’t want to last time,” she croaks, her hand leaving his hair to loop around his shoulders.

“I know, sweetheart.” Aaron’s hand travels up her back, slowly rubbing circles between her shoulder blades. None of them acknowledge the nickname that slipped out twice in the span of five minutes. They just stay there, listening to the faint music trickling in as Aaron presses his lips to her hair, smelling honeysuckle at her temples.

“Will you stay?”

Emily doesn’t answer. She’s slow to disentangle herself from his arms, straightening and adjusting her shawl before she reaches for him again. “Dance with me.” She whispers as she takes his hand and guides it to her waist.

Aaron follows her lead. Emily leans forward and wraps her own arms around his waist, her fingers hooking through his belt loops as Aaron’s palm finds its home on her back. She fits her head under his chin and they start to sway with slow aimlessness.

The music doesn’t quite reach them here, but the symphony of their intertwined breaths is enough. 

“You know, I thought about it once.” Emily says. Her voice travels through his skin, a little muffled against his throat. “At mother’s gala.”

Aaron hums, his thumb skimming her hipbone. “That was the first time for me,” he says. He closes his eyes and it’s so far away now, an age since he first wanted to dance with a girl clad in a red dress.

Cold air hits his neck and Emily tilts her head back, a different shine to her eyes as she asks, “Care to tell me about all the other times?”

Her lips are inches away from his, and though Aaron isn’t entirely convinced she won’t bolt, he’s more at ease with her like this in his arms. “Bold of you to assume I remember all of them.” He arches a brow.

“Don’t you?”

He absolutely does.

Aaron smiles. Emily’s hand travels up his side, gently cupping the lines of his body. “I’ll tell you,” he murmurs, a slight hitch to his breath, “if you’ll go out with me.”

Emily smiles, too. “I’ll have you know, I only dine in Michelin Stars.” She says softly, shallow dimples forming in her cheeks.

“Well it’s a good thing I happen to know a few.”

She hides in his neck again and he feels the slight imprint of her smile against his skin. A ghost of curved lips, a small whisper of forever. 

They continue to rock to the faint music, Aaron’s cheek pressed to Emily’s hair. The movement of their bodies is slow and unhurried, nothing like he’d imagined and somehow infinitely better.

It’s their first dance. 

It’s not their last. 

taglist: @kllingdaddy @luhwithah @cheetobreath07 @dontemilyyyyme

[delulujuls]

birds of a feather | joost klein

hi, its me again. i know its been a hot minute since i posted here but literally i have no idea when the past month left.

anyway, im alive and i finally got a chance to write something, so here it is. its nothing that i used to post here i guess, but i it means a lot to me. while writing this i remembered all of those dark days that i managed to survive. and i guess, joost himself did too.

please, if you struggle with mental health or you just dont feel good at that moment, i do not recommend to read this. feel free to text me if you need to talk to someone.

remember that you are not alone. you can get trough everything as long as you have you.

je bent sterker dan je denkt

summary: joost is struggling with his mental health, but so do reader. but together its a bit easier to go through storm and its even better to look at the rainbow with someone dear by your side.

warnings: struggling with depression, ed, parents loss

pairing: fem!bff!reader x joost klein

Snow fell throughout the night, so the next morning, all of Leeuwarden woke up under a heavy, white blanket.

However, some didn’t get the chance to wake up because they hadn’t managed to close their eyes at all. One of those people was a girl laying down with open eyes in her dark room.

Despite having no desire, motivation, or strength, after a while she sat up in bed more than an hour before her alarm was set to go off. She wrapped herself in the blanket and closed her aching eyes. It felt as if someone had poured two bags of sand under her eyelids.

Her room was in complete darkness, with only the warm, yellow light from a streetlamp filtering in through the uncovered window. The whole house was silent, and nothing outside suggested that anyone else existed in the world but her. She could hear her tear-stuck eyelashes pulling apart with each blink.

She sighed heavily and rubbed her face with her hands before finally getting out of bed. She couldn’t afford to skip class; she had already accumulated too many absences recently. The last thing she wanted was to deal with her teacher, who kept repeating the same thing over and over— that she should talk to her parents, that she would call in a psychologist. Just let me live, woman, she thought. Or better yet, let me die.

With a soft groan of displeasure, the girl pulled off her warm sweats and quickly put on an uncomfortably cold shirt and hoodie. The jeans she put on were also unpleasantly cold and stiff. The chill around her cut to the bone.

When she went to the bathroom and turned on the light, she squinted with a grimace. She shuffled over to the mirror and looked at her reflection. Nothing surprising stared back at her. Puffy, red eyes from crying, chapped lips, and skin irritated from a runny nose. She sighed and looked down, tying up her hair and turning on the tap, trying to make herself somewhat presentable.

When she finished, she didn’t look much better. The last thing she felt like doing was putting on makeup. A shower from the previous evening was the best she could manage. Before going downstairs, she grabbed her backpack and phone, glancing at the screen. Beside the clock, it was empty. Worried that maybe WhatsApp had failed, she opened the app and clicked on her last conversation. Joost hadn’t replied to her messages since the night before. She sighed and shoved the phone into her pocket. She knew she wouldn’t go straight home after class.

Not feeling like eating breakfast, she simply put on her shoes, jacket, and left the house. It was even colder outside, so she pulled her hood over her head and wrapped herself in a scarf. She couldn’t wear gloves—how else would she change songs, she thought, putting her tangled earphones in.

Even more snow had fallen than it seemed when looking out the window. It was still early, so the streets were covered in snow. The walk to the bus stop was exhausting. When she finally reached it, she realized she still had plenty of time to spare. She reached into her pocket, pulled out a pack of cigarettes, lit one, and took a drag. She pulled out her phone from the other pocket, changed the song, and opened her conversation with Joost again. Nothing had changed.

you could at least read my messages. that way, id know if you were alive 06:50

She typed with frozen fingers, holding the cigarette between her lips. The girl exhaled the smoke and sent the message, glancing at the cracked screen of her phone with faint hope. Nothing.

The phone that received the message vibrated on the bed. Its owner, however, wasn’t there but on the floor. Joost lay on the ground, staring at the ceiling. He tried to focus on breathing. Only on breathing. Only on surviving.

He had no idea what time it was, how long he had been lying there. Had he made it through the night, or was it still yesterday, or maybe already tomorrow? On both sides of his head were small, wet spots from the tears that had spilled from his heavy eyelids. He was like a defeated, fallen Gulliver, his tears carving out lakes.

He didn’t feel the cold, didn’t feel the pain in his back. He didn’t feel how badly his head hurt from crying or the emptiness in his stomach. He couldn’t remember when he last ate something warm, despite his sister and brother's urging, when he last took a shower, or held his phone. When was the last time he actually spoke to someone? A few hours ago? Or last month?

If looks could drill holes, there would already be a small but precise one in his ceiling. Only when he heard a knock on the door did he snap out of it. It was morning, and his room was filled with light. He had survived the night.

“I’m heading to work, want a ride to school?” his sister’s voice came from behind the door.

It took him about five seconds to remember how his vocal cords worked.

“No, I’ll manage.”

“Are you planning to stay home?”

Silence. On both sides of the door.

“I don’t want to have your school on my back, okay? You’ll go back to class after the weekend.”

Joost sighed in relief, closing his eyes.

“Thanks, really.”

“There’s breakfast on the table,” he heard her footsteps fade away. “Eat something!”

At that moment, he regained consciousness. With great effort, he managed to sit up and lean his back against the bed. He rubbed his face with his hands and clenched his fists in his hair. After a moment, he sighed and looked ahead. The clock on the bedside table showed a few minutes before eight. He hadn’t even heard whether his brother had returned from the night shift. It was as if he’d been in a trance all night, focused only on the passing seconds, taking minute by minute, hour by hour.

When he managed to climb back into bed, he pressed his cheek against the cold pillow and instinctively reached for the phone lying nearby. In the flood of notifications, he noticed more than ten messages from his friend. He felt a pang of guilt.

He swiped and entered their conversation.

you know we can always talk. you dont have to deal with this all on your own 00:21

i know. thanks 00:46

That was the last message he had replied to.

apparently you dont know, because youre doing it again 00:54

you always shut yourself off and dont let anyone in. why cant you understand that you matter to someone? 00:55

you act like youre deliberately torturing yourself, like you purposely want to take on all the fucking pain and show that only you are suffering. surprise, youre not the only one 01:00

im sorry. i didnt mean it like that. its just been hard for me too lately, and im worried about you. i didnt want to say that. im sorry.. 01:12

i want to help you, but i dont know how. how am i supposed to do that if you wont let me? 01:18

i cant imagine losing you, do you understand? 01:19

for fucks sake, theyd bury us together. i couldnt make it without you 01:20

let me help you, please. or at least dont shut me out 04:29

im worried, joost. please reply 13:54

Missed calls x7

you could at least read my messages. as it is, i dont even know if youre alive 06:50

im alive. im sorry 08:01

He replied, staring at the screen. He read her messages several times. He knew he could rely on her, that he mattered to her. But on the other hand, he couldn’t accept it. Him? Someone cared about him? Hey, wasn’t he just the funny, slightly chubby kid who always told silly jokes and made everyone laugh? That he had problems? What kind of problems could a teenager like him have?

She, however, knew that Joost had been through a lot. Losing his parents year after year can break anyone, let alone someone like him. Since she had met him in high school, Joost had always seemed like an extrovert, the center of attention, telling the funniest jokes with his booming voice. But beneath the surface, which he had built himself, lay an incredibly sensitive boy with a big heart. He was the kind of person children smiled at, and dogs ran up to for a pet.

Joost was like a gentle giant. He could pretend that nothing bothered him, that dumb jokes or words thrown around in laughter didn’t hurt. But every one of those words or situations lodged itself tightly in his mind like a pack of rats that couldn’t be driven out for anything. It was as if his body lacked the receptors for anger or aggression. He wished everyone he knew well, but the feeling wasn’t always mutual.

When he was younger, not long after his parents died, he was often mocked for being an orphan. The mean comments and jabs were so hurtful that he stopped attending classes. When someone pointed out that he seemed to have put on a bit of weight recently, he went a week eating nothing but apples, drinking water and smoking cigarettes.

Now, even though some time had passed since then, and he had been through several rounds of therapy, he still had periods like this. When all he wanted was to be alone and let the cold embrace of sadness surround him. To rest his head on the bony shoulder of depression and weep bitterly.

But it wasn’t to be, as he suddenly flinched, hearing something hit his bedroom window. He realized he had lost touch with reality again and had been staring at his phone’s dark screen for who knows how long.

Thinking he had misheard, he settled more comfortably on his pillow.

The girl squeezed the snow harder in her hands, forming a snowball. She took aim and threw it at his window again. When Joost replied to her message, she knew she had to seize the moment. She had skipped the last two classes and immediately went to her friend’s house. She wasn’t leaving until she talked to him.

She took aim again and threw another snowball at the window. This time with success, as moments later, she saw Joost looking out.

He wasn’t sure whether to believe his eyes, but his friend tapped her finger on her wrist, signaling that she had been waiting long enough. The corner of Joost’s mouth involuntarily twitched upwards, and he quickly went to open the door. He knew that if he didn’t, this psycho would keep throwing snowballs until the window broke, and she’d climb in through the tree. He preferred to avoid that.

He unlocked and opened the door, but before he could say anything, she threw herself around his neck and hugged him tightly. She was cold, and her hair smelled like frost, but she was so alive, so different from the bony arms of depression.

“Don’t do that again,” she mumbled, holding him close.

Joost felt all the air trapped in his lungs release as he closed his eyes. He wrapped his arms around his friend, resting his cheek on her head.

"You're letting the cold in," he said after a moment, trying to lighten the mood as the wind blew snowflakes inside. "Come on, get inside."

A few moments later, the two friends were in Joost's room. It was clear that cleaning up was the last thing on his mind. The girl glanced around and silently began picking up the scattered clothes from the floor.

"Please, leave it," Joost groaned, collapsing onto the bed. "I'll do it later."

"If you're not going to help, then go take a shower," she replied, putting the relatively clean clothes back into the closet and setting the dirty ones aside near the door.

"I'll do that later too," he mumbled, rubbing his face with his hands. Only now did he start to feel how utterly exhausted he really was.

"We both know how that will go," she said pointedly, casting a glance his way. He sighed, feeling her gaze on him.

"I'm too tired. I just can't."

The girl hung up his coat and sat next to him. Joost looked at her face. Only now did he notice her puffy, swollen eyes, sunken cheeks despite the rosy flush from the cold, and chapped lips. He recognized the look.

He immediately recalled one of the messages she had sent him. You're not the only one suffering.

"What happened?"

He furrowed his brows and sat up, studying her face carefully. She knew exactly what he meant. Joost saw the same exhaustion in her that she often saw in him.

She sighed and lowered her gaze.

"I haven't been feeling great these past few days. But you probably know what I mean."

This time, it was his turn to lower his gaze. He didn't know what to say.

He didn't need to say anything.

She moved closer and hugged him, pulling him into a tight embrace. Joost desperately hugged her back, holding her in a bear-like grip.

"I'm sorry," he muttered after a while, still holding her. His voice trembled. "I should be supporting you, but instead, I'm just a burden. It's the only thing I'm good at."

"You're not a burden, Joost," she protested, pulling back slightly to look at him, emphasizing her words. "We should be supporting each other. No one else will understand us better than we understand each other. We're in this together."

At some point during her words, two large tears rolled down Joost's cheeks. She wiped them away with the back of her hand.

"I'm sorry," he said, burying his face in his hands, knowing that those two tears were just the beginning. On top of feeling miserable, guilt now added to the weight. It's not that he was unaware of his friend's struggles with mental health—he knew, just as she knew what he was going through. On most days, both of them were cheerful and lively, the life of the party. But sometimes, for a few days, a week, or even two, their light would go out. Depression was a grim lighthouse keeper.

She hugged him again, holding him tightly. Joost clung to her as if she were a lifeline.

"Everything will be okay," she whispered, stroking his hair.

"Everything will be okay," he echoed. "We'll get through this."

They sat there in silence for an undefined amount of time, wrapped in each other's arms.

"I'm not joking about that shower," she said after a while. "I guarantee you'll feel better."

Joost sighed and pulled away from her, nodding. He stood up and went to his closet, grabbing some clean clothes.

"You don't have to clean up, really," he said, glancing at her one last time before reaching for the door handle.

"And wash your hair too," she replied, standing up and continuing to organize his clothes. She looked at him and gave him a small smile, nodding her head to tell him to go and not to worry about the rest.

"Thank you," he returned her smile and went to take a shower.

When he came back, he looked much better. He also felt better. His room no longer resembled a battlefield. Clothes and trash no longer littered the floor, dirty dishes were gone, and the bed was made. But his friend was nowhere to be seen.

Joost peeked out of the door and, hearing movement in the kitchen, went downstairs. His friend was putting dishes into the dishwasher.

"This is probably for you," she said, pointing to some sandwiches wrapped up on the counter.

"I doubt I can eat anything," he replied, glancing apologetically at her. After a moment, he wondered if she had eaten. She also had trouble with eating sometimes. "But I'll eat if you eat with me."

"That won't be enough for us."

"I know, but we can make pancakes."

The girl smiled at his suggestion and nodded.

A few moments later, the kitchen filled with the smell of frying pancakes and the sound of easy conversation. The kind of conversation that, after a storm, offers a glimpse of normalcy. Joost flipped the pancakes while his friend sliced fruit they had found in the fridge. The warm atmosphere began to chase away the heavy clouds.

They weren’t alone. Even when they craved solitude, they weren't isolated. They had each other.

The girl unintentionally glanced at her friend, and noticing his damp bangs falling into his eyes, she pushed them back from his forehead with a gentle hand. Joost smiled at her gesture, unable to help it. She smiled too.

Birds of a feather, we should stick together, I said I'd never think I wasn't better alone Can't change the weather, might not be forever But if it's forever, it's even better

Neither of them said it aloud that afternoon, but in the quiet corners of their minds, they both thought how grateful they were to have each other.

[junk-culture]

dearly beloved we are gathered here in the sight of god to anoint charles our parasite in chief with his most idiot hat.

[heartorbit]

a wahoo girl in a wahoo world

[brittlebutch]

I genuinely love the way Billie holds herself with my whole heart; more characters need to start doing it like her <3

[ghostsangel]

Please please please can I get Ghost being so unhealthy obsessed with a girl who insists she can do everything herself. No she doesn't need help with the gear, nobody ever helped her before. Want to spot her? Fuck off. She's not lifting more than she can handle. She won't take help from anyone and it pisses Ghost off.

Secretly she's just scared of being vulnerable, so when Ghost manages to wrangle her into a situation where all she can do is accept his care (and his dick) he gives her all the treatment she's secretly craved.

omg this is an amazing concept.

simon “ghost” riley x fem!reader

warnings/tags: mdni, smut as fuck, reader is so stubborn it’s insane, ghost is obsessed, unprotected sex, oral (f!receiving), creampie, squirting

Ghost truly doesn’t understand you.

He’s stubborn, but you may be the most stubborn person he’s ever met. The first time he offered to help you was with your gear the first day on base—you snatched it from his hands so fast his head spun, scowling at him and telling him you could handle it just fine. It’s hard to shock Ghost, but you did, and he was intrigued.

Ever since that day, he’s watched you. It’s almost unhealthy the way his eyes gravitate toward you in a room. It’s almost like you won’t accept help from anyone just to piss people off—like you have a point to prove.

Today is no different. His muscles strain under the weight of the dumbbells he’s lifting, his eyes flicking over to you. You’re on your back, lifting a pair of weights, your lips pursed as you concentrate.

Ghost almost smiles when he watches a new recruit waltz over to the bar and try to spot you.

“I can do it myself—I don’t need a spot,” you hiss out, giving the recruit such a poisonous glare he scurries off without another word.

Ghost sighs, setting down his weights and looking down at you. “He was just tryin’ to help.”

“Don’t need help,” you mutter, eyes flicking to him as you set the bar down. “I’m a grown woman.”

“Just ‘cause you’re grown doesn’t mean you can’t choke yourself with the bar.” Ghost scowls at you under his mask.

You roll your eyes, sitting up and wiping your sweaty neck with a towel. “Fuck off. Haven’t ever had a spot before, and I sure as hell don’t need one now.”

“Stubborn,” Ghost mutters under his breath, watching the way your lips press together in a thin line.

You leave quickly after that, and Ghost can’t help but feel slightly annoyed with you. He understands being stubborn—hell, he’s stubborn. But he accepts help when he needs it. He knows his limits. You, on the other hand, have never accepted help. Well, not that he’s seen.

A few days later, the two of you are paired on a mission. It’s a simple objective—infiltrate the warehouse, get the intel. You’re silent as you hold your gun by your side, peeking around a corner. Ghost squats behind you, waiting for the all clear so you could take out the guards.

You nod at him, and the two of you move forward, shooting at the few guards on the warehouse. What you don’t expect are shots fired from the left of you, a bullet grazing your arm. Ghost grips the back of your uniform shirt to pull you behind a stack of crates, quickly shooting the figure and kneeling beside you.

“You okay?” He asks, eyes searching the bleeding scrape the bullet caused.

You stand, glaring at him. “I’m fine. I had it handled, Ghost. Could’ve taken him out myself.”

Annoyance and anger run through Ghost, his eyes narrowing. “I saw you get shot and reacted quicker than you. That’s why I’m the Lieutenant, and you’re not.”

Your nostrils flare, but you say nothing else before you check if it’s clear before heading to the warehouse. You and Ghost are in and out faster than you think is possible, and completely silent on the heli ride back to base. You grip your gun, posture stiff as you sit next to your Lieutenant. Ghost glances at you and sighs, wanting to speak but not wanting to cause a scene in front of the others.

The heli touches down and you leave before Ghost can get a word in edgewise. He watches you go and shakes his head before heading to Price to debrief and give him the intel.

A hot shower is next—something Ghost needs. He strips, taking the mask off and glancing at himself in the mirror. His eyes rake over his scars—jagged, white lines across his skin from torture, blending in with the circular burns from his father’s cigarettes.

Swallowing, he showers, thinking of you the entire time. You infuriate him, but god—does he want you. Yeah, you’re stubborn and you piss him off, but he’s so enamored with you that he can’t help but fantasize about you every waking moment.

He spends the shower trying to avoid touching his hardening cock to the thought of you, instead taking the time to wash every inch of dirt off him before rinsing and getting out. He dresses casually—black sweats, black tank top, black surgical mask. His baclava and mask are too fuckin�� sweaty to put back on.

He tugs on his boots before heading to the mess hall, bumping straight into you. He looks down at you, watching your eyes harden. The bullet wound is still bloody—you haven’t cleaned it.

“Lieutenant,” you stiffly say.

Ghost tilts his head. “You okay? How’s the arm?”

“Fine. Nothing I can’t handle, Lieutenant.”

His eyes narrow, nostrils flaring beneath the surgical mask. “Have I done something to offend you?”

You roll your eyes, crossing your arms in front of you. “Other than save me when I didn’t need saving, yeah.”

Ghost has had enough. He grips your uninjured arm and tugs you inside his room, lips pressed to a thin line. You stumble inside, and he shuts the door behind him, crossing his arms in front of you.

“What the fuck is your issue?” He asks, voice gruff as he glares down at you.

“My problem? I don’t have a fucking problem,” you reply, heart thudding in your chest as you look up at him.

He shakes his head, taking a step closer to you. “You do. You don’t let anyone help you—even if they have good intentions. I took action today to save your life and you’re mad at me for it.”

You say nothing, just look up at him, eyes wary. He looks down at you, eyes flicking to the blood on your arm. “Sit down.”

“I can—”

“That’s an order.”

You huff before sitting down at a chair in front of his desk. He mutters to himself as he digs through his drawers, pulling out an alcohol wipe and a bandage for the wound.

He kneels in front of you, ripping the alcohol wipe open and discarding the trash on his desk. He begins to swipe at your arm, and you wince at the sting.

“Sorry,” he mumbles, eyes flicking up to yours.

“It’s okay,” you mutter back, holding still so he can work. “I’m sorry.”

The words seem incredibly hard for you to say, and surprise flashes in Ghost’s eyes as he tosses the alcohol wipe to the side. He says nothing, just undoing the bandage and wrapping it around your arm.

You clear your throat, inhaling deeply. “I…would rather do everything myself. It’s, uh…sort of like a guard.”

Ghost nods, tying the bandage in place before dropping his hands to his sides. “A guard.”

“Vulnerability scares me.”

His eyes search yours, head tilting to the side as he assesses you. “So that’s why you do everything yourself?”

“It’s not that I want to. I have to. I’m just…scared of opening up to someone.” You bite down on your bottom lip, and twiddle your fingers. “That’s why I don’t get close to people.”

“We’re pretty close right now, don’t ya think?” Ghost asks, smirking at you through the surgical mask.

You roll your eyes, a playful smile on your face. “Shut up.”

He doesn’t miss the way your cheeks heat, and he leans forward, hands resting on either side of the chair. “Don’t you secretly crave for something more?” His voice is deep, gruff.

You squeeze your thighs together, eyes never leaving his. “Maybe.”

Ghost uses his hands to spread your thighs, fitting his body between them. His lips ghost over your neck, mask pulled down, and your breath hitches in your throat.

“Ghost,” you murmur, your fingers squeezing the fabric of his tank top.

“Shut up and let me take care of you,” he grumbles before his lips meet yours.

The kiss is slow and sensual, and a moan slips past your lips as his tongue slides against yours. Your hands move up his chest to his neck, pulling him closer to you, your legs hitched around his waist.

His large hands slip down underneath your shirt, the touch of his fingertips tingling your sides as they travel up.

His lips move to your jaw, skimming down your neck and sucking at the skin. Slowly, his fingertips travel to your covered pussy, rubbing your clit in slow circles through the fabric of your pants.

You gasp, the sound music to Ghost’s ears as he smirks against your neck. Heat flares in your stomach, traveling to your core, and you can’t help but spread your legs, offering yourself to him.

He takes his time, tugging your pants down, taking off your shirt. Removing every article of clothing until you’re bare in front of him. His eyes take you in, his cock already chubbing up in his pants as he admires your naked body.

“Fuckin’ hell,” he grunts, spreading your legs with his large hands. You’re dripping, your pretty slit soaked with your juices and dampening your thighs.

He holds eye contact with you before his tongue flicks out, licking a fat strip up your pussy and sucking your clit into his mouth. He’s slow—taking his time with you. His tongue lazily strokes your clit, flicking and running around it.

You look at him, eyes half-lidded, hand on the back of his head. He groans into your cunt, the taste like heaven on his tongue. Your back arches, moans and whines slipping past your lips as he takes care of you.

You almost don’t notice when his middle and ring fingers tease the entrance of your pussy, and you buck your hips up at the sensation. Ghost laughs softly against your clit, sucking it into his mouth and flicking his tongue against it before his fingers push inside of your pussy.

You’re tight, and he lets out a grunt as he feels your gummy walls try to accommodate his thick fingers. He curls them and feels that little spongy spot that makes your toes curl, and your hips jolt, a lewd moan ripping from your throat.

“That’s it, yeah?” He murmurs, tongue running around your clit. “Feels good, doesn’t it, doll?”

“Yes,” you groan, his fingers beginning to thrust in and out of your tight hole.

Ghost focuses on your clit, picking up speed and licking your clit in fat strides. Your eyes roll back, head tilted back at the pleasure. It won’t take you long to come—it’s been a long time since anyone’s given you this treatment.

You clench around him, and he chuckles against your pussy, fingers working quicker. He isn’t moving them in and out, just thrusting them up and down against your spongy walls.

“Clenchin’ around my fingers so tight, doll,” he says, moving his fingers faster. “Come for me. Give it to me.”

His words push you over the edge and your pussy flutters as you squirt, your release costing his hand and wrist. He lets out a moan, flicking your clit and licking up everything you give him.

“That’s it, good fuckin’ girl.”

You pant, legs trembling as he removes his fingers from your cunt. He works at his own pants, tugging them down and revealing his heavy cock, hard and fat, his balls hanging heavy. He picks you up like you weigh nothing, pushing you against the wall and pushing his cock inside of you.

He gazes into your eyes, groaning as his fat cock stretches you out. Your nails dig into his neck, clenching tightly around him as he buries himself inside you.

“Fuck,” you whine, rolling your hips down so his tip nestles nicely against your cervix.

“Gonna take me so good aren’t you, sweetheart?” Ghost breathes out, beginning to fuck you against the wall.

You can feel every ridge and vein of his cock as he fucks you, your pussy squelching lewdly as one of his hands settles around your throat. You let out a whine in response, his cock brushing against your g-spot and making you see stars.

No one has ever fucked you like this—hard, fast, and attentive. Ghost knows exactly what he’s doing—he’s an expert. A particularly deep thrust steals the breath from your lungs and you let out a moan, clenching around him.

“Fuck, relax, sweetheart. Gonna make me fill this cunt up if you squeeze me like that,” he mutters, gazing into your eyes.

You grin at him, mouth hanging open as he fucks you deep. Your orgasm is already building, an inevitable force from the way he’s taking care of you. You claw at his neck, and he squeezes your throat as he ruts up into you.

“Go on, doll. Come for me. Milk my cock.”

The words make your legs tremble around his hips and your back arches as you come, cunt throbbing tightly around him, juices dripping down his cock onto his heavy balls. His eyes flutter shut and he lets out a long groan, burying his face in your neck as he fucks you harder through your orgasm.

“Want me to fill this pretty cunt up? Hm?” He murmurs, kissing your neck as he fucks you. “Want me to fill you up till it’s dripping down your thighs?”

You moan out a yes, and you feel Ghost’s cock twitch inside of your pussy. He bites down on your shoulder as his hips stutter once, twice—then he’s burying himself inside your pussy, cock throbbing and balls drawing up as he shoots load after load inside of you.

“God, so fuckin’ good,” he pants out, breathing against your neck as he holds you against the wall, cock still buried inside you.

Raising his head, he grins at you. You smile back, eyes searching his.

“Come on, love. Let me clean you up and we can have a cuddle,” he says, gently lowering you to the ground as his cock slips out of you. He has to force himself not to get hard when he sees his seed dripping down your thighs.

“I can—” You start to object.

Ghost tugs you to him. “Shut it. Didn’t you learn anything from what we just did?”

[altruisticalastor]

↳˗ˏˋAlastor x Wife!Readerˊˎ˗ ↴

☒ Summary: Lucifer gets a little too brazen with Alastor's darling wife. Guess the Ruler of Hell would just have to learn a lesson about who you belong to.

☒ Warnings: fem!reader, she/her pronouns used, jealous!alastor, soft comforting shower sex, knotting, alastor has a tail, consent, making out, soft kisses, biting, marking kink, alstor laps up the readers blood because he bites a liiiitle too hard, creampie, banter between alastor and lucifer, as well as banter between the reader and angel

☒ Word Count: 1,972

Alastor was quite the jealous type. 

You were his wife in life and death. To say he was protective of you was an understatement. So, it only made sense that Alastor would lose his composure when the ruler of hell himself arrived at the Hazbin Hotel. 

Lucifer was a rather charming man, but you were spoken for. So when he grasped your hand and placed a chaste kiss on the back of your palm, your hand yanked away in the blink of an eye. You could have sworn you heard a crackling growl escape your husband's lips as he watched Lucifer offer you a lustful gaze- and that was simply unacceptable. 

"I see you've met my wife!" Alastor let out a forced chuckle as he looped his arm around your waist, pulling you close to his side. You let out a sigh of relief. All thanks to your husband's rescue. Lucifer gave Alastor a pointed look before he blurted out, "You're joking... right?" He scoffed. 

Your face scrunched up in anger at Lucifer's rude remark. "Oh, he's as serious as a heart attack." You spat, snaking your own arm around Alastor's back. You squeezed his waist, a habit of yours that let your dear husband know when you were livid. 

"But- look at you! You're gorgeous, sweetheart, and he's just... freaky." You were about to snap back before your husband's maniacal laughter tore through the room. "Ha Ha! That's rich coming from the short stack!" Alastor quipped, grip tensing around your waist. Lucifer's chest puffed up in defense before he let out an airy laugh. 

"Aha! The height I lack up here, I surely make up for below the belt! Maybe I can show your wife sometime." Lucifer shot you a playful wink, causing your face to scrunch up in disgust. Alastor tensed beside you before he let out another forced laugh, ducking low to get in Lucifer's face. "Ha Ha! Fuck you." Your husband spat, voice missing its usual radio static tone. 

Before the situation could escalate further, Charlie intervened. Pushing her father away from the tense atmosphere while mouthing a sympathetic "Sorry!" your way. The aura in the room was stiff. You could certainly cut the tension with a butter knife. "Damn, smiles! Looks like lil' Luci himself has got eyes for your girl!" Angel stated before taking a swig of his cocktail. 

You turned your head in Angel's direction. Shooting him a warning glare. The last thing you wanted was for Angel to get caught in the crossfire of your husband's anger. Alastor remained quiet before he slowly began walking toward the staircase. You could tell he was seething with how his ears twitched atop his head. Your husband flickered up the steps without a word, making you worry. 

"Damn it, Angel! You knew he was pissed enough as is, no need to poke the bear!" You sighed, rubbing your temples as you made your way over to the bar. Husk poured you a drink, shaking his head in agreement. "Dont'cha mean poke the deer?" Angel chuckled, patting your back in a lighthearted manner. Husk cursed under his breath at Angel's remark. 

"Cut that shit out, or he'll put you on his next fuckin' broadcast," Husk grumbled, cleaning a glass with a worn-down rag. You sipped your drink before rubbing your temples once more, shaking your head in annoyance. "I should probably go check in on him..." You spoke to yourself before turning on your heel, waving a small goodbye to your two good buddies. 

"She's in for a loooong night!" Angel giggled, causing Husk to flick his forehead as a warning to "Shut the fuck up."

You took a breath before carefully opening your shared bedroom door. "Darling?" You called out, descending further into the space as you scanned the room for your husband. You peacefully made steps toward your private bathroom, having heard the shower running from beyond the door. To your luck, the door was left unlocked, making it easy for you to slip inside. 

The bathroom was full of steam as your eyes trailed to the red tufts of hair reflecting through the clear glass shower door. Alastor heard you come in, but he still remained silent. Trying his best to cool off. He hated losing his composure more than anything. Carefully, you began ridding yourself of your garments, leaving your clothes in a pile beside Alastor's. You slid the glass door open, stepping into the shower with your husband. 

Alastor's ears were pinned against his head as he stood underneath the shower head, allowing the water to cascade down his face. His back was toward you. Your husband's hands were placed in front of him on the cold tiles. Keeping him stabilized. "Al, my love? Is it alright if I touch you?" You whispered softly from where you stood behind him. A moment passed before he nodded in agreement, still remaining silent. 

Slowly, you wrapped your arms around him. Allowing your hands to caress his midsection all the way up his chest. You rested your head in between his shoulder blades, pressing your chest flush against his back. Alastor let out a deep sigh, your touch bringing him much-needed comfort. "That impudent man.." Your husband muttered, ears twitching in annoyance as he did so. You rubbed circles into his chest, placing gentle kisses against his back. 

"He's a jerk, Al. I'm all yours, forever and always," Your lips curled into a smile toward the end of your sentence as you felt his tail wagging, brushing against your lower tummy. Your husband's shoulders eased up from your words. He let out a breath before turning on his heel. Alastor's hands immediately cupped your face, doubling over to capture your lips with his. Your eyes fluttered shut, hands rubbing your husband's sides lovingly as your mouths molded perfectly against one another. 

Your shared embrace lasted a few beats longer before your husband pulled back, half-lidded crimson eyes gazing down at you. "Indeedy, my doe. You're all mine! I suppose I'll have to make it evident to the short stack... and anyone else who dares to court you." His voice dipped low; as did his wandering hands. Alastor's pointed nails dug into the back of your thighs as he hoisted you up. On instinct, your legs wrapped around his slender waist. 

A pleasant gasp escaped you as you felt your husband's hard length brush against your core. Alastor let out a deep growl against the nape of your neck as he nipped at the sensitive flesh there. "Alastor..." You whined. Tipping your head back so your husband could have better access. A shiver ran down your spine when your back collided with the cool tile walls. Alastor bit a little too harshly between the juncture of your throat and shoulder. 

A bit of blood trickled down your collarbone, but your husband was quick to lap it up. A deep groan from him sent a rush of heat down to your core. "Divine, my little doe. Absolutely delectable," Alastor mumbled against your sternum before one of his hands slipped between your bodies. He rubbed the flushed tip of his cock between your folds, groaning at the feeling of your slick. "May I, my darling?" Alastor whispered, lips ghosting over yours as he waited patiently for your approval.

"Yes, please..." You sighed, burying your hands into his soaked two-toned locks. Your husband slowly pushed himself past the tight ring of your pussy. Capturing your lips at the same time, drinking up all of your moans as he stretched you open. Your eyes rolled back into your head when Alastor bottomed out inside you. Slowly, you caressed his sensitive ears. Pride pooled in your chest when your husband twitched wildly inside you from the gesture. 

Your lips pulled back from his when Alastor began thrusting into you. His movements were sharp but shallow, not wanting to pull back more than he had to from the warmth of your pussy. Your husband's head fell forward, forehead resting flush against your shoulder. Alastor groaned against your damp skin as your walls clenched tightly around his throbbing cock. All you could do was moan in pleasure as your husband fucked into you perfectly. 

"Mine, all mine..." Alastor huffed out before suckling at the base of your neck. You could feel your husband's knot begin to swell inside you as your own release approached rapidly. Apsentmindly, Alastor's thumb dipped between your bodies. He rubbed at your clit expertly as he jackhammered up into you. Your legs tightened around his waist as the coil within your tummy was only moments from snapping. "I'm yours, all yours..." 

Your words sent Alastor over the edge. He moaned loudly into your neck as his hips stilled, emptying his load deep inside you. The feeling of your husband cumming inside you was enough to trigger your own orgasm. Alastor hissed as he felt your pussy gush around his cock, squeezing him like a vise. After a few moments, you felt Alastor's knot begin to deflate. Allowing his now softening cock to slip out of your inviting heat. "You truly are just darling. How did I get so lucky?" Alastor chuckled as he lifted his head to gaze into your eyes. 

A bashful smile crossed your features as Alastor slowly lowered your thighs from off his waist. Being sure to hold your hips, stabilizing your trembling legs. "Oh, hush! I'm the lucky one." You giggled, untangling your hands from his hair. Allowing your palms to cup his face, pulling him down for a chaste kiss. Alastor kept his eyes open as you kissed, admiring your lovely visage. After a moment, you pulled back, nuzzling your nose into his. "Now, let's get washed up before heading back out there, yeah?" 

Alastor and you emerged from the room a little while later. Meeting up with the group from where they gathered in the foyer. Charlie cheerfully waved you and your husband over, and you didn't miss the way Lucifer scowled at Alastor. "We were wondering where you lovebirds wandered off to," Vaggie stated, scooting over on the couch to allow you both to sit. Swiftly, Alastor sat on the sofa before pulling you into his lap. A smile etched into your face as your husband's arms looped around your frame, large palms caressing the tops of your thighs. 

You heard Lucifer grumble under his breath from the public display of affection. Your friends, on the other hand, had their jaws on the floor. Alastor rarely showed his physical admiration toward you in front of them. So, to say they were shocked was an understatement. "Told ya they snuck away to fuck! Look at her neck, haha- Husk! You owe me that hundred bucks," Angel blurted out. Laughing his ass off. Heat rushed to your face from your friend's crass words. Alastor, on the other hand, glared at Lucifer. His smile stretched from ear to ear as the ruler of hell fumed. 

"Angel-! Husk-?! You made a bet on whether or not Alastor and I would... ah, you fuckers!" Embarrassment flooded your entire being, hands darting up to cover your face. Alastor let out a loud chuckle from your adorable reaction. "No, toots. We're not the fuckers! You're the one who got fucked, aha!" You quickly got up from your spot atop Alastor's lap, storming over to Angel. "Husk, you're next!" You shouted, chasing Angel around the lobby. "Leave me out of this! That dumbass wouldn't shut up until I accepted the bet." Husk grumbled, not entertaining the bullshit. 

All the while, Alastor was giving Lucifer a sharp look with that shit-eating grin still illuminating his features. "As you can see, there's no need for you to show my wife your little chum below the belt. My darling is more than satisfied in my care!"

[cosmictheo]

𝐎𝐍𝐄 𝐎𝐅 𝐘𝐎𝐔𝐑 𝐆𝐈𝐑𝐋𝐒 | feyd-rautha

(gif credits to @pascow)

— summary: an arranged marriage with feyd-rautha in the name of reconciling your houses was something you were not expecting, neither was the soft and light way he seemed to behave towards you and only you. —pairing: feyd-rautha harkonnen x female!atreides!reader —word count: 3k —warnings: arranged marriage, feyd being gentle and calm because the reader is the love of his life (as it was written), probably ooc!feyd (sorry but i just love to see the most savage and feral men fall on their knees for their s/o)

writer’s note: english is not my mother tongue, so please forgive me if there is a grammatical error. hope you like it!

ᯓ★ part one ── part two ── part three (coming soon)

Your arranged marriage to Feyd-Rautha had been the reason for House Atreides and Harkonnen to strengthen their alliance, ensuring that neither would stab each other in the back, which was most expected from the Baron. Your Houses had been wavering on a faint thread that separated you from a war and this marriage arrangement had pacted a reconciliation. It had been your parents' idea and obeying your parents was the most important thing for you, right after protecting your family and indeed that was what you were doing, guarding your family.

Your twin brother did not like the idea, he was not very fond of Feyd-Rautha and his House, moreover, he found him rather... repulsive. For Feyd was a savage, a ruthless and bloodthirsty man.

However, he had to admit that, next to him, you would be basically untouchable, after all, it was like having a guard dog, the most possessive and protective dog, a dog that was ready to kill and ravage for you if necessary.

“He's scary.” Paul's voice echoed inside your head as together you walked along the vast hallways of the Harkonnen palace, at the end of it, Feyd-Rautha stood, engaged in a conversation with your parents, forever as stiff and somber as he had been since you had first met him.

“Just look at him, you'll have to wake up next to him for the rest of your life.” Your brother insisted, throwing you a knowing and concerned look. “We can fix this without you having to marry that man, sister. There must be something—”

“Enough.” you interrupted him, finally dragging your eyes from your betrothed to your anxious brother pacing beside you, you made an effort to offer him a reassuring, soft smile, grateful that he was always so caring and concerned about you and your well-being. “There's nothing else we can do. You know about my visions and what they foresee. Our House will not endure if I do not accept this offer.”

“We will do whatever it takes to survive for now.” You added, holding Paul's gaze, noting the sadness and pity behind his dark eyes, and like the good sister you were, you sighed softly, leaning closer to him to bring him some kind of reassurance. “Our turn will come to make our move and win, brother.”

“Whatever it takes.” He echoed, nodding his head, fingers brushing your clasped hand around his forearm, as you were accustomed to do when you walked side by side.

“The marriage will take place two weeks from now.” The Duke's voice gave out the news once you were all inside the assembly room, with the Baron at the head of the table, of course, looking uncharacteristically approving and pleased to hear the announcement.

The massive man showed his approval with a hint of a phantom, twisted smile, plump fingers taping the edge of the black table in front of him. “We will have the princess as a guest in our home for a week and then the na-Baron will visit her home for the last week, prior to her coming to live here.”

He planned the whole thing and there was absolutely no one in the room who had the idiotic courage to be against his command, so, it was settled.

Once you said goodbye to your family and gave a tight and emotional hug to your brother, you were left alone in the dark and gigantic planet of the Harkonnen family, feeling like an outsider, like a small prey surrounded by bloodthirsty predators. Although, the place possessed an indescribable and incomparable beauty, the sun was black, and the light that irradiated was whitish, giving it a beautiful contrast with all the black buildings rising majestically. But the place was rather... depressing, quiet and somewhat eerie, it was nothing like your home.

You soon felt out of place, and everyone who looked at you could see it too. It was as if you had some kind of golden aura, glowing among all the darkness and gloom of the place.

Feyd-Rautha watched you attentively, analyzing every expression and emotion you let be shown across your face, catching the look your eyes possessed, that special little gleam that flashed in your orbs as you admired Giedi Prime as if it were one of the most beautiful things you had ever seen in your life, his home.

“Do you like it here, my lady?” His husky, raspy voice managed to snap you out of your trance, and your heart skipped a beat once you trailed your gaze from the horizon beneath the balcony to him, meeting his deep, dark gaze. He always seemed to look at you with those eyes, captivated, as if you were some form of strange spectacle.

And indeed you were, you stood in perfect contrast to the planet, your eyes were bright, lively, your aura was vivacious and hopeful. And because of that, he liked to look at you, study your face, your body language, every little reaction you had in response to something. You were fascinating.

Whenever you entered any room, his deep blue eyes were pulled to you like a magnet, drawn to orbit around you like his planet circling the dark sun.

Feyd noticed out of the corner of his eye how your hands clasped lightly around the balcony fence in front of you, skin contrasting against the blackness of the material. 

You nodded your head very slowly, twisting your body just enough to be able to look him directly in the face, big eyes looking up at him, not with fear, but with expectation. “I do.”

Even your voice was the opposite of his, keeping that soft and delicate tone, as elegant as you.

He seemed satisfied with your positive response, and so, he dared to lean against the balcony fence right next to you, but careful not to cause you to feel too uncomfortable or intruded upon. His eyes never left you for a second and he was quite pleased that you were bold enough to hold his powerful and intimidating gaze.

“Good, it will soon become your home too.” Feyd answered you, in a tone that oscillated between amusement and fascination, you didn't quite know how to decipher the expression on his face either, naturally.

He was very complicated to read, even if you tried extra hard, the many tutoring and lessons with Lady Jessica didn't seem to do much use, with him. Perhaps because he made you feel unnerved, he made your soul tremble like no one could, stepping beyond your walls and standing where none of your senses seemed to work. Where the eye could not see.

“Are you mocking me?” Still, you had the courage to ask him that bold question, one eyebrow rising on your forehead and your head twisting slightly, defiant face and all.

Your bravery made him laugh slightly this time, a noise that was heard almost unnaturally, with a small crooked smile on his lips that looked all too unusual and strange on him. For not even his strongest and most powerful enemies had had the courage to stand in front of him and challenge him like you were doing right now. You were a fierce girl. And he liked that.

“I wouldn't be likely to mock you, my lady.” Feyd-Rautha replied calmly, his tone of voice the exact same, as if you were a spectacle. Your eyes lowered to his hand, which snaked slowly to the edge of the balcony fence, fingers stroking the smooth surface. “I'm just stating the obvious. You'll be living here with me soon. It will be our home and you will reign with me when it's my turn.”

You narrowed your eyes slightly at his response, not yet quite convinced that he would behave so calm and composed with you, when not more than two days ago you had seen him slicing men to pieces in the arena. “You are not bothered by me invading your space?”

You asked that question because you knew how... eccentric men usually behaved, you could see it in basically every man with any power you had ever met, in the so many meetings with the Duke back home. You could see how they treated their wives, how they looked at them and how they talked to them, as if they were dealing with a servant. You feared this marriage was like that too.

Even your parents' marriage was broken, since Duke Leto kept close to his heart another woman who was not Lady Jessica, he did not love her as he loved that unknown woman. You had grown up seeing an empty and cold marriage, merely to fulfill a duty.

You understood that your marriage would also have that basis, and therefore, you knew that duty was the death of love. But for some silly, innocent reason, you wanted to think there might be love here. As the naive, young girl that you were.

Feyd-Rautha shrugged, not taking much interest in the matter of the question, “You'll be my wife, my space is your space.”

A hint of a smile tugged at the corner of his lips when he saw that his answer pleased you. You could begin to understand that to him the whole arranged marriage thing wasn't as important as it was to you, or maybe it was, but it didn't seem to bother him or disagree.

“Does this marriage bother you?” It was his turn to ask, staring down at you, noticing how beautifully your skin reflected the pale natural light of the black sun. He could see how frustrated you were now, to be there, with him. “Does it bother you to be my wife?”

You sighed heavily, peeling your eyes from Feyd-Rautha and returning them to the beauty of the landscape below, pondering the questions. His dark eyes followed your every movement as your body turned forward again, hands gripping the balcony fence as if your life depended on it.

“Do you care much for my opinion of you?” You decided to answer him with another question and that seemed to annoy him for his frown deepened and his fingers halted on the fence, devoting himself to glaring at you with his azure eyes, mirroring the pallid light of the gloomy sun.

“Woman, I will marry you and live by your side for the rest of my life, of course your opinion is important.” He took a couple of steps closer to you as he spoke, hand closer and closer to yours, managing to make you even more nervous. “Don't speak nonsense, it doesn't suit you. You're a smart girl.”

Seeing the expression on your face, he leaned even closer and out of the corner of your eye you watched as his hand rose to your face, resting on your chin and turning it ever so gently for you to look at him, but your eyes lowered, fleeing from his.

It seemed astonishing to him that you didn't even flinch away when you sensed the approach of his hand to your face, as if it wasn't the same hand that had slaughtered so many and slit so many necks by the same motion.

“Don't take your eyes off me.” He demanded in a low, raspy tone of voice, you could feel his breath brush against your face. “Look at me.”

When he whispered your name in that delicate, nearly pleading tone, you finally summoned the courage to look at him, allowing him to cradle your chin between his fingers and allowing him to be so close to you that you felt suffocated by the warmth of his body against yours.

“You fear me?”

He asked in that tone of voice, whispering, silently asking you to have mercy on him, not to fear him as everyone usually feared him, not to see him as the monster everyone saw, but as your husband, your protector and your lover.

He saw how your eyes watered slightly as fear peered into your usual stoic, cold face, and Feyd-Rautha was used to beholding that face, was used to fear, because it was always the last look of his enemies.

“I'm afraid. Of leaving home, of living on an unknown planet, of marrying someone I don't know.” Then you shook your head softly, looking up at him through your long eyelashes. “But I am not afraid of you, Feyd-Rautha.”

“You're very bold... and emotional.” He whispered in a disapproving but gentle voice, fingers tracing barely a caress along your lower lip before he reached up and dried the couple of tears that had managed to escape from your pretty eyes. At the closeness, you could begin to see through the mask he always carried, hiding his emotions. “You can't let yourself look like this in front of your enemies, it will make you appear weak.”

“I can't let myself look like this in front of my future husband?” his dark eyes lowered to your lips as you modulated the question, pupils dilating slightly. You swallowed as you saw desire and lust darken his orbs even more when you referred to him as your husband. You sniffed, feeling suddenly embarrassed by your outburst of emotions. “I'm s—sorry. You shouldn't see me like this, my lord.”

“Don't apologize.” He again reprimanded you in that passive-aggressive tone of his, like a hiss of a snake, shaking his head a little. Even after he wiped away your little tears, his hands remained in the same place, cupping your face, each of his thumbs resting on your flushed cheekbones.His fingertips were surprisingly gentle against your skin, sending shivers all over your body beneath their path. “You can be like this only with me, you understand? You can trust me, I want you to trust me.” His fingers took a lock of your hair and pulled it away from your face, running it carefully behind your ear. “But I really don't like to see you cry, my wife-to-be.”

After barely a second of silence with his azure eyes again flicking down to your parted lips, he spoke again, muttering, his raspy voice indicating that perhaps it hurt his throat to talk like that. “Pretty girls like you should cry out of pleasure only.”

He studied your face once more, not missing the way you blushed at his open flirtation and suggestive words, how you bit your lower lip, pupils expanding in thick blackness. You weren't used to so much attention, let alone men saying those kinds of words to you, it was evident. You were so innocent that it provoked a rare feeling of tenderness in Feyd-Rautha.

Perhaps it would be the closest thing to an act of consolation you would get from him and it was likely the only time in his life he had ever done that.

Promptly, you managed to make him smile again. “You Atreides are so strange and delicate... but then again, you will soon be Harkonnen, the prettiest na-Baroness, my pretty little wife.”

From his voice, his careful choice of words and the way he was looking at you, you expected him to kiss you right there —perhaps that was what you wanted, amidst all the tumult of emotions that shook your little heart, beating in rumbling noises inside your chest, pumping fiery blood through your veins.

But after a few seconds, he pulled his hands away from your face and backed away from you, taking a few steps back and offering you a look that you managed to perceive as soft rather than harsh. You knew that he was controlling himself well in maintaining a good demeanor, perhaps because his uncle had ordered him to do so; to do his best to make a good impression and not bring shame to the family. And also because he wanted you to have a good image of him, he was a prideful man, he was used to boast of his virtues and his power, and he was above all, protective of his own person and his glory.

He made a short gesture with his head pointing to the open balcony door, his hands clasping together behind his back pragmatically, as if he were presenting himself in front of a superior. “Now come, pretty girl, I'll show you the palace myself. You're future home.”

You walked towards him, a little smile curving your lips, the first smile on your face during the entire conversation, and he admired it in all it's glory.

“You don't have to be all stiff when you're with me, Feyd.” You eyed his posture with light eyes as you passed him and made your way inside the guest room with graceful steps, him following close behind.

He wasn't very fond of being addressed by name directly, of having his name used so freely, but the way you pronounced his name made him so utterly proud to be called that, he suddenly was wishing you would just call him that, in that tone of voice, tongue savoring his name as if it were the most delightful thing to say.

You turned to look at him for a few seconds, your tone of voice becoming reassuring, something he wasn't quite used to, yet he heard and savored it as if it were the sweetest thing in the world.

“If you can see me cry, then I can see you relaxed. It is only fair, no?”

Feyd-Rautha received your words positively, causing him to deepen his breathing into a snorting chuckle, eyes sparkling with amusement now behind your back.

“I'll try for you.” His response made you smile once more.

[ddejavvu]

Cant stop thinking about Logan bending Wades darling little sister (in her 20s) over the kitchen table while Waded out on a mission. That is all I can think about right now

Insatiable - Logan Howlett x Reader

send me logan requests!

contents/warnings: smut, minors dni. age gap (legal; reader is in her 20's, logan is like... 200 years old.), wilson!reader, dirty talk, slight breeding mentioned

The only reason you're able to do it in the kitchen is because Wade isn't home, and you'd managed to shut the door on his pathetically endearing little dog. Mary Puppins is probably tearing up Wade's poor excuse for a comforter right now, and Logan is tearing up- well.

You.

Your pussy.

You're bent so far over the counter that your tits are cold, your nipples stiff and sensitive against the countertop. The pressure against them hurts, or maybe it's a lack of other stimulation against them- either way, they're stinging and you wish to right yourself and tug mercilessly at them.

But Logan's weight- not the full load, or you'd be crushed - is holding you down, your hands scrabbling uselessly at the smooth counter for purchase that you'll never find as you're rocked steadily into the cabinets below.

Logan's cock is buried so deep inside of you that you're not sure he'll ever get it out again, but then he does, and then he thrusts back in and you're hit all over again with a sense of shit, I didn't know I went that deep. He's found your limit, stretched your cunt to the breaking point with his impressive length, and his facial hair tickles the side of your face as he takes your cunt from behind.

Your face smacks painfully against the cabinets over the counter and Logan reaches a hand up to cover your forehead, "Shit, be careful. Head down, honey, there you go. Wouldn't want Big Brother finding an imprint of your face in the wood."

"Whaddya think he'd say?" Logan's suddenly snickering, a gruff delight to his voice as he rams his cock inside you once more, thrusting at a steady, merciless pace, "Shit, if he knew my old ass had his sweet little sister pinned up against the counter..."

Wade would kill him. Or try valiantly to, as it's been established before by Wade's best efforts that Logan is one difficult motherfucker to kill. But you don't fancy a bloodbath even if the vessel will survive, so you tuck yourself tight to the counter so that you won't have to explain to Wade why the cupboard door is off its hinges.

Leaning forwards more only pushes your ass out further, and Logan groans, dick twitching, as he's able to thrust more viciously beneath the curve of your ass. He's humping you like a dog, a depraved pace set as he chases an impending orgasm.

"Taking you in your brother's house- aagh, shit," Logan grunts, nose nudging against the back of your neck as he inhales your sweat, "God he's gonna drop his swords on this fucking counter as soon as he walks through the door, not- not even gonna know your tits were smashed up against it. He's gonna get coke from that cabinet in an hour," Logan's voice is strained, moreso the faster he pumps his hips, and all you can do is cry out as he ravages your cunt, "He's never gonna know I made his sister cream up against it. Never gonna know I fucked my fuckin' babies into you here, aah- agh-I-!"

Logan bites, hard against your shoulder, catching some of your neck in the process and introducing yet another blindingly painful sensation that turns into sick, twisted pleasure between your legs. Your cunt is spent, barely capable of another orgasm after you'd already had two fucked out of you before, but it gives you its best shot as Logan's thick, warm cum gushes into you, immediately too much for your poor pussy to handle as it drips down your thighs instead.

Logan relinquishes your shoulder with a low groan, his breath coming hot and heavy as he pants, "You alright?"

"Yeah," You whimper, legs shaking as Logan holds you steady, "I- I don't think I can stand anymore."

"That's okay." Logan hums, gentler now that he's fucked himself calm. He peels you off of the counter, supporting your body weight as he half-walks, half-drags you down the hallway towards his bedroom, "Next round's on my bed, sweetheart. You won't need to move a muscle."

[moechies]

would you mayhaps mind writing more toji x bunny!hybrid reader... perchance...

pretty pleek 🥺

(ALSO I LOVE YOUR WORKS SM AHHH)

cw ❤︎ bunny is a little weird ‘n loves sniffing toji’s fat bawls ;( don’t make fun of her ! toji makin bunny jealous , throatfuckin !!!

you’re a possessive, insatiable, and messy little thing. and although he does truly love every single one of your animalistic traits, it’s definitely something anybody would find out of the ordinary. not like he minds a bit.

₊˚⊹ ❤︎

toji adores the way you pout, eyes growing bleary when he tells you he needs to leave the home for work. it’s not so much him needing to do his job, but at the mention of a ‘she’ twined into one of his sentences, and now it’s the only thing you find yourself focusing on.

he urges you not to cry, hoisting you onto his lap and pressing your hiccuping self into his warm chest before shushing you gently. but you don’t see the ill-intentioned smirk that spreads across his plum lips as he soothes you from above.

“mhm, it’s an overnight mission, s’i won’t be home till tomorrow, bun.”

“a-are you going to sleep with her ? in the same bed ?” you question meekly, and toji lets out an unassuring hum.

toji loves working you up with his words, and bringing you back down with his cock. it’s so much of a game to him, but not to you.

your poor sensitive heart clenches when he offers no sort of affirmation, leaving your little mind to wonder aimlessly. your chest huffs with both frustration and anger at his pauses, quickly attempting to pull off his chest and away from the mean, mean man.

“i-i hate you !”

but no, he doesn’t let you pull off. he holds you down tight, thighs clad against his meatier ones as his stiff cock prods against your warm cunt. “g-get.. away !” you yelp, turning away to avoid the man from seeing the falling tears that leak from your pretty eyes.

“shh, bunny. c’mere.” he chuckles, pressing your resisting chest against his despite your tried efforts, pressing gentle kisses across your face covered with streaky tears. “‘course ‘m not gonna sleep with her, dumb bunny.” you hiccup, refusing to look into him before plopping your cheek against his chest.

“liar . ‘m gonna kill her.” you whisper.

toji chuckles again, petting your hair and soft, fallen ears, pulling them up high to resemble your usual happy persona with perky ears.

“don’t be so naive, bun. ‘m yours, and yer mines. promise, hm ?”

“p-promise ?”

“i do, i promise.” he speaks, humping his bulge against your chubby cunt. you yelp, reaching out for toji’s arms for support. “let me make it up to my bunny, hm ?”

❤︎ ₊˚⊹

the sun’s glare peeks through the translucent curtains, waking toji from his slumber. he groans, reaching his arm over expectingly, wanting nothing more but to envelop your soft body into his; just to feel his arm fall against soft sheets instead of your skin.

the sudden throbbing ache in between his legs feels much more prominent than before, his thigh twitching at the unfamiliar feeling.

he cracks an eye open, peeking down, and…

he can’t believe his eyes.

you; your insatiable little self, with his boxers tugged barely below his sack, and your little hand pushing back on the base of his cock. your nose is nuzzled against his fat, dewy balls, taking deep inhales of his musky scent. his vision trails down your other arm, leading his sight to your hand in between your soft thighs, erratically pumping two little digits in your chubby pussy while grinding onto a soft, white pillow all at once.

“m—mister… hnnn,”

your nose twitches incessantly, nuzzling the bud impossibly deep against his manhood, little pink tongue even slipping out to get a taste.

your ears flare out to the side of your body, hairs standing, cottontail twitching because he knows you’re just so close, you’re almost there, and your little pouting lips trying their hardest to keep your mewls quiet.

and finally, you let out a content cry, filthing your tiny fingers in thick, creamy cum. your humping comes to a slow, and you finish the job by leaving a long lick of saliva against toji’s cock for one last moment of wonder.

toji can’t help but laugh, scaring the bunny life out of you. you freeze, but he stops moving. it’s just a dream, right ? there’s no way you woke him up.

and just when you’re about to scurry away, clean up your mess and slip back into the sheets as if nothing every happened, there’s a hard tug on your sensitive little ears, one that drags you back towards your boyfriend’s standing cock where you were just a few seconds ago.

did you really think he wouldn’t notice ? poor bunny.

you squeak, his cock is harshly pressed into your warm gaped, mouth, and—

“what a rude bunny. usin’ me t’get that weeping cunny off without somethin’ in return. y’owe me this, hm ?”

₊˚⊹ ❤︎

“y’r so damn messy.”

toji grumbles, fingers threading through your hair, tugging at your ears.

his thighs are covered in your sticky slobber, strings of saliva dripping down his length and falling against his bushy base.

you don’t care. a mess is easy to clean and temporary, but who knows when your owner will leave on a mission, allowing your mouth to be empty for days ?

your cheek bulges with his chub, his pre slipping against the soft flesh of your mouth and leaving a salted flavor against your tongue.

“c’mon, take it deeper.” toji urges, adjusting your little face by your hair so that his pudgy tip lays against your throat.

“bigggg stretch, bunny.” he giggles, watching your eyes widen and hands slap against his meaty thigh when he presses down your unprepared throat, stretching the resistant flesh violently. you gag a multitude of times, mouth leaking uncontrollably as if you’re lubing toji for a smoother process.

“looks like this messy bunny mouth does have some good use f’it, hm ?”

❤︎ ₊˚⊹

[angelicdanvers]

THE CLEARING | luke castellan.

pairing: luke castellan x fem!reader prompt: “i could admire you all day.” by @normal-internet-user

summary: a sweet moment in the clearing of pearls. takes place before tlt. wc: 1.2k

a/n: i'm back in my luke castellan phase and this time, unapologetically :') ik ik, he's the enemy. totally :D i haven't written in so long, i really hope you guys enjoy this! i eventually will make a collection of these on my wattpad (of the same username). have a great day/night! <3

camp half-blood was just as rhythmic as any other day. the campers were up and running, tending to chores or activities, chiron was introducing some new campers, mr. d had his legs hitched up on the table and was slumbering.

and yet — somehow — something still felt off to y/n. she couldn’t put her finger on it. for a child of ares, she was undeniably observant of her surroundings, ready to feed a punch, but she didn’t see nor feel anyone around. 

often times, she realized it was her subconscious warning her of her siblings’ antics. despite coming off as a cold hearted bitch, y/n was quite the opposite and everyone in camp knew. whether they experienced her dual sidedness face to face, they heard of it and believed it. it wasn’t common for all the ares children, even clarisse, to like one person, sibling, mutually. yet y/n was that sibling.

she didn’t mind it. the eighteen year old was one of the oldest and made it her duty to keep everyone in check, even if that meant going against her easy way out — anger. her siblings often appreciated that despite not showing it, but sometimes clarisse had a lot to say.

this definitely wasn’t one of those times, though.

clarisse had just come by and helped y/n braid two of their younger sisters’ hair, the two chatting normally and without any apparent trouble.

then what in the world kept nagging her?

she kept sensing an odd aura around camp. maybe it was the gods’ doing. maybe.

sighing, she sat on the cabin floor, watching as the last of her brothers walked out. she began tying her laces, fixing the tongue on her boots. her instincts picked up as she heard soft crunches from the side of the cabin. grabbing her sword, she walked out diligently, observing the area around her and positioning the sword towards the crunches. she carefully examined the reflection, absolutely no sight of anyone. stiff, she shrugged off her unease, heading down the paths and to her clearing.

the clearing had a waterfall cascading at the heart, a sparkling little pool in the centre. for nine in the morning, the earth was still dewy and the crisp scent of the woodlands surrounded her senses.

inhaling deeply, y/n stepped towards her favourite boulder and slid her shirt off. one by one, she stripped down until she was in her bikini, and fixed her locks to be appropriate for swimming. once ready, she slowly dipped her foot in, the coolness of the water pulsing through her body and sending a jolt within her. 

a mere moment later, y/n was wading in the water, beginning to take laps around the pool. she always had a surge of energy in water that always made her wonder if she was actually poseidon’s daughter — of course, she wasn’t, but maybe she had to thank him for her love of water. maybe. maybe it was just her and the gods really didn't impact her.

submerging underneath, the girl opened her eyes and scanned the bottom. on her lucky days, she’d find little pearls the nymphs would leave behind. she'd have to personally thank them one day. her growing collection was all towards making special beads for campers who’d been there for a significant amount of time, symbolizing their individuality. she was thinking of giving annabeth and luke one to add to their necklaces before all else.

squinting, y/n saw a shimmering area in the corner. charging towards it, she picked it up and examined it with her hands; the water was getting rather hazy. these pearls were heavier, and with more texture than she’d ever felt.

smiling to herself, she carefully held it within her palms, swimming further up and merging out of water. she felt the sun shining on her, and she braced for the sudden light adjustment.

and then the sun was gone.

her brows furrowed, and y/n cracked open an eye, glancing towards where she felt the sun mere moments ago. instead of trees and simple clouds, she saw a lean figure wearing an orange shirt and khaki cargos, arms folded across their chest. she knew those arms.

“gods, what are you doing here?” y/n questioned, slightly lowering herself into the water and staring at the male before her.

he stifled a chuckle, his signature smirk playing on his lips. “what? can’t a guy be with his girlfriend?”

“luke,” she warned, “didn’t we agree to not be around each other unless we actually had a plan to sneak off?”

the curly haired boy shrugged. “like that’ll stop me.”

“luke, c’mon. if anything, we can’t have anyone find out like this.”

he shook his head, “they won’t know a thing.” he nodded towards annabeth’s cap. 

y/n had to admit, his desperation to be with her in any way was the most adorable and hot thing she’d ever witnessed. “did you at least ask her for it?”

“yes ma’am.”

y/n smiled toothily, wading towards the edge and climbing out. luke watched her every move, enthralled by her beauty. he wasn’t sure how he even convinced her to go on that first date, considering she had a knee on his chest and a sword to his neck. too bad he’s the best swordsman and pinned her down next. 

how could she say no after that?

she found him quite intriguing as well.

luke followed his girl as she went over to the boulder, grabbing her towel and gently drying herself off. he headed up behind her, taking the towel from her arms and drying her back off for her. 

“that still hasn’t healed,” he noted, tracing the scar on her shoulder blade. y/n’s body melted at his touch, and the chills she felt were replaced with flames. 

“yeah,” she whispered as luke softly turned her around, wrapping the towel around her body. he brought her body closer to his, putting his index to her chin and tilting her head up.

“you know, i could admire you all day.”

“and why is that?”

he laughed, “with that sexy soul and sweet hobby of collecting pearls, how could i not?”

y/n felt her cheeks grow hot, a soft grin making its way to her face. “i could say the same, pretty boy.”

"who are you giving those pearls to?"

"if i said who, wouldn't the surprise be ruined?" she quirked, tilting her head to the side a little. "eh, word on the street keeps mentioning the best swordsman."

luke smirked, satisfied with her answer, his black hair gleaming in the sly sunlight. y/n cupped the left side of his face, tracing her fingers on the scar to his right. their eyes couldn’t leave one another’s, an enigmatic energy floating amongst them.

“i want to kiss you,” luke’s voice was lower than before, his grip tightening around her waist.

“do it,” y/n mustered up, fluster traversing through every bone in her body. 

without second thought, luke pressed the girl against his body, capturing her lips. y/n’s fingers trailed to his hair, tugging at the curls as their lips intwined passionately.

the teenagers yearned for each other, their love enveloping around them as they remained  in their locked position. luke’s lips were as light as a feather but had a hold on y/n that she was sure no other could.

breathless, the two pulled away for a moment before luke pulled her in again for a quick, feverish kiss. “i love you,” he rasped, staring deep into her riveting eyes.

“i love you, luke.”

their admiration could only grow from there. 

or so they thought.

[wileys-russo]

in the blink of an eye (2) II a.putellas

part one in the blink of an eye (2) II a.putellas

"it has been years, time to forgive yourself."

eli's words had been playing on your mind for much longer than you cared to admit, despite the chaotic dumpster fire mess that your life was that really should have meant you were at capacity for things to overthink about.

like your mind ever listened to you though, or missed a chance to play a wonderfully wickedly cruel trick.

"i wanna pick!" speaking of.

"vale. you can pick your clothes nena, but remember it is hot outside sí?" you smiled, honestly far too exhausted from yet another sleepless night dealing with the poor three year olds endless night terrors to have the energy to argue with her over what she wanted to wear.

you knew this coffee date was important but you also knew mariposa's needs came before anything, and building up her independence was surely not a bad thing?

"posie. no!" you laughed as the girl returned, rubbing your hands down your face and shaking your head as moments later the three year old toddled back out, wrestling furiously to try and pull her head through the leg hole of a pair of jean shorts.

"you look like a wrestler." you teased, tugging the shorts off and smiling at the annoyed scowl which painted her face. "don't laugh!" the girl huffed, smacking your leg with a scowl and crossing her arms.

"we need to leave soon princesa, can i pick por favor? you can pick tomorrow, promesa!" you squatted down and held up your pinky, the three year old giving in with a nod and a grunt, locking her pinky with yours as you both leaned in and kissed the others finger.

"can't break it." the girl huffed as you nodded, her surprised giggles filling the air as you snatched her up, carrying her back into her makeshift bedroom upside down by her ankles.

"down tia! down!" the girl demanded, collapsing into a fit of giggles as you dropped her on her bed, careful she didn't land on her neck as you did so.

you smiled as posie grabbed her favorite bear, starting to sing a little tune to him as you rummaged through her wardrobe picking out an outfit. but suddenly, the singing stopped, then you heard a little sniffle and your head whipped around, features softening as you watched her tiny hand wipe away a stray tear.

"hey hey hey bebita, qué pasa?" you were sat beside her in a flash, picking her up and sitting her on your lap as her face hid itself in your chest, one of your hands cradling her head and the other gently rubbing her back.

"mami's song." the girl managed out as your heart cracked and you squeezed your own eyes shut at the emotions which poured down on you like someone had cast a storm cloud above your head.

"oh." you managed out, her little body starting to shake with an awful broken sob, her tears staining your shirt and you adjusted your position slightly, squeezing her tightly and mumbling assurances over and over in her ear.

the same words you'd repeat to her every night you'd wake up to hear her screaming, horrid wailing filling the apartment as you'd fall out of bed and sprint to be by her side, taking her in your arms and gently shushing her.

by now it was routine she just slept by your side in your bed, tiny fist curled into your shirt, grip unrelenting and desperate, night terrors always lingering just over her head like a thundercloud waiting to burst with rain.

posie had always been in your life from the very moment hers began. you were her one and only tia, your older sister your only sibling and her husband an only child who was long estranged from his parents.

when posie was a baby she could be rocked in a singular arm, your mami cooing and fussing over her just like she had when both you and your sister natalia were her own babies.

these days your mami suffered from arthritis and could hardly lift the tv remote let alone a wiggling three year old, her fingers gnarled and wrists stiff, a result of working far too many hours for far too many years just to keep a roof over your head when your father left one day to get milk and never came back.

being a tia wasn't a job you took lightly, and despite the fact you'd moved away from barcelona years ago it never stopped you making as many trips over to see her once she was born, or your sister and brother in law bringing her to madrid to see you every few weeks once she was old enough to travel.

her cheeks were always rosy, never without a bright but gummy smile plastered on her face, always giggling and babbling, desperate for any sort of attention and your sister and her husband gave it to her by the bucket load.

but when the accident happened, your role in one another's life was changed forever.

"miss her. miss mami! and papi!" posie choked out once her sobs had turned to shallow gasps and her head rested on your shoulder, tiny little fists gripping your shirt as if one wrong move and you would disappear entirely right in front of her eyes.

"i know nena, i know. i miss your mami too." you whispered out with words barely audible, swallowing a sob of your own which started to claw its way up your throat, tears banking up in the corner of your eyes and threatening to spill over as you fought to pretend they weren't there.

lips lingering on the side of her head with a few gentle kisses, you were unable to stop the small smile curling into your lips as your niece wiped her nose on your shirt a few moments later as if you were a big human tissue.

"have to see the lady?" the girl asked quietly, grip on you loosening just slightly as she wiped her nose again this time on her bear which you made a mental note to wash later.

"sí, we have to see ana. but she is nice to you, no?" you rubbed the girls back who nodded. "and, you get cake nena." you poked at her stomach softly as her smile returned, pad of your thumb tenderly and carefully wiping away the tears which had begun to crust the corner of her eye.

"when we get home tonight we can do whatever you want. dress ups, fashion show, tea party, make cookies, watch tv, anything!" you promised, slowly moving her off of your lap and gently prying off her fingers which still gripped to the shirt you now needed to change.

"watch mami and papi's video?" posie asked hopefully as you tried not to let the way your heart twisted show on your face, nodding with a pained smile, bouncing her gently in your lap.

"sí bebita, we can watch mami and papi's video." you promised, the tape of your sisters wedding that posie had stumbled across a couple of weeks ago practically living on your tv screen since the day she'd first watched.

your own mami had urged against it, warning it might bring up some feelings which were far too big for a three year old to process. but you were still learning how to say no to the small girl and when she hit you with the puppy dog eye and pout combination, you were done for.

but to everyones surprise not a single tear was shed as posie sat and watched the ceremony which wed her mother and father, a genuine smile on her face for the first time in far too long as the moment it finished she was demanding you play it again and a routine of sorts fell into place.

really both you and your therapist were certain it was a coping mechanism, but theres no real way to explain that to a three year old who had lost both of her parents in the blink of an eye.

with posie finally dressed and ready you'd packed the same blue little backpack you now knew to take everywhere with you and hoisted her up on your hip, locking the front door after you.

you smiled kindly at the older woman who stepped into the elevator after you, who wiggled her fingers at posie in greeting as the three year old hid her face shyly in your neck and the woman gave you an amused smile.

"vale. this is not rocket science idiota, you can do this." you mumbled to yourself as you strapped posie into her car seat, tugging her thumb out of her mouth every few seconds as she settled for sucking on the ear of her teddy instead.

another coping mechanism.

you sighed in relief as finally you managed to slot the lock of the belt in, the stupid thing far too complicated for a seatbelt but at least you knew there wasn't a chance posie was getting it undone with how long it took you to get it locked in.

"listo?" "sí, vamos!"

~

"-and a job?" ana asked, firmly but not unkindly as you were quick to nod, pausing to wipe posie's face with a napkin where she'd decide to smush most of the cake around her mouth rather than in it.

you glanced up apologetically as you rummaged around in the little blue backpack for the wet wipes, ana too busy scribbling something down to notice as you grabbed out the pack and yanked one out.

"tastes good!"

"how can you taste the cake if you wear it and do not eat it?" you teased causing the three year old to giggle, gently holding her head still as you wiped away the chocolate smeared around her mouth.

"lo siento ana, what did you ask?" you grabbed out a little wooden puzzle for posie to play with, a happy squeal leaving her mouth as she sat herself down by your feet to fiddle around with it.

"oye! the ground is dirty posie." you scooted your chair back and slipped your arms under her elbows, pulling her up and onto your lap, settling the puzzle down on the table in front of her as she made no move to argue but rather slumped comfortably against you.

"a job, steady income." ana reminded with a small smile as you nodded.

"sí, at a little clothing shop not far from the apartment. i know it is not much but it is three days a week and that is as much as i can organise childcare for her until we've settled in a bit, found a routine." you nervously fiddled with your rings under the table.

"hey, a start is a start. i want to work with you so that this works for her, so that she is as best looked after as she can be and stays with family." ana assured quietly as you exhaled shakily, giving her a small but uncertain nod.

"i know these normally feel stressful, and i can see you are nervous chica. but that is why i asked we meet here and not in my office, so that it felt a little bit less formal." ana gave you a kind smile as the tension in your shoulders melted away a little.

now slightly more relaxed you answered her questions with a touch more confidence, nodding and taking down your own notes as she explained what else she'd need to see before she could sign off the papers and take everything to family court.

"you said you grew up here, sí? you have family here? friends?" ana questioned as you hesitated before nodding. "some, a lot i lost touch with when i...moved." you forced a smile as ana nodded and scribbled something down.

"do you know her? she has been looking over to us for the last ten minutes." ana tilted her chin behind you as you frowned curiously and turned your head to glance over your shoulder.

though as you did and you caught the eye of your assumed spectator, your blood ran cold and your body froze, rigid and tense all over again like you were made of scrap metal.

her hair was different, longer, blonder, and tied up in a neat ponytail. she looked like she'd just come from the gym in bike shorts and an oversized shirt, yet you didn't even need to see her figure hidden beneath it so be able to draw it from memory with your eyes closed.

her face was shadowed by a faded blue nike baseball cap which was tucked on her head, and though her eyes were covered by a pair of black expensive looking sunglasses, you could feel them peering right into your soul and it had your heart hammering in your chest.

"old friend?" just as suddenly as alexia had appeared it was as if you blinked and suddenly she was gone, merely a faceless figure in the back of your mind, haunting your most tender and endearing of memories like a ghost.

only you didn't need someone to pinch you to know you hadn't been dreaming, her gaze seared into your forehead as you caught a flash of blonde hair duck around the corner and you frowned.

"sí...something like that."

~

as alexia hurried around the corner, feet smacking the pavement with hollow thumps, cursing herself both for running away and for the fact she'd done so before her coffee was ready so the entire trip was now voided useless all together.

alexia was angry, burning and boiling and seething like a wave at its peak ready to come crashing and smashing down toward shore.

no, she was upset, agonizing over what could have been, what should have been, as if someone had just grabbed her heart in their fist and squeezed as if it were a stress ball.

no, she was disappointed. gut wrenchingly, soul crushingly, undeniably, disappointed. fixated on a scene she'd imagined a million times over in her head and yet the real thing couldn't have been more different if she tried.

or was it perhaps, that she was frustrated? heartbroken? torn up? hollow? numb? jealous?

emotional, alexia was overwhelmingly emotional.

which is how she found herself pulling into a driveway which was once hers but no longer, head covered by the hood of her jacket, baseball cap tilted downward masking her face.

with her heart hammering in her chest and stomach queasy with an apprehensive sense of heightened anxiety she hurried up the driveway as if you might jump out from the bushes at any second, ready to yelp and laugh like all of this just a cruel prank or a sick joke.

with knuckles tense and ready to pound themselves against the faded blue of the front door, alexias hand curled to form a fist, however before she could even lift her arm it was swinging open.

"hermana? what-" not letting her sister finish her sentence alexia was already barreling inside with a huff, leaving the younger girl to roll her eyes at her dramatics and close the door after her, grumbling something under her breath

"mami! mami? mami!" alexia called out, eyes flickering rapidly around the room trying to spot her, spinning around on her heels as a hum sounded, the older woman staring right back at her with a raised eyebrow.

"you will never guess who i have just seen." the blonde grunted with a shake of her head, alba taking a seat at the table watching on curiously. "your ex almost fiance?" the younger girl guessed, biting into an apple as apples head swiveled so fast it should have flown on.

"eh? cómo lo supo?" alexia managed to spit out in shock as her sister chuckled. "lucky guess hermana." alba smiled taking another bite of the apple, crunch echoing around the room and making alexias eye twitch.

"qué pasa hija?" eli gained her attention again, alexia spinning back around with another huff, shaking her head and starting to pace back and forth. "here we go again." alba mumbled under her breath with a roll of her eyes.

"so she says no to marrying me, no to a family, no to a future. but then i see her and-and-and-" alexia stuttered though it was one fueled by anger, not nerves.

"-and we break up. a few months goes by and she moves away to madrid, a year and she loses my number, time passes and i do not have to see her face in front of me for nearly three years and now-" alexia paused to scoff, throwing

"-now she has done all of that which she refused me, but with another woman! she has a baby, a family, maybe she is married? quién demonios sabe!" alexia laughed in shock, dragging her hands down her face and pausing for a moment, giving the threadbare rug beneath her feet a brief pause of respite before right away resuming her furious pacing back and forth across it.

"i thought you were over her? ale it has been four years since you broke up." alba sighed, immediately falling silent at the venomous glare sent her way by the older blonde across the room, holding her hands up in surrender.

"and the other woman? la nueva mujer? she is too old for her! parece una abuela." alexia spat, eyebrows furrowed angrily as she practically threw herself down in a chair, head resting on her chin and eyes moving slowly to glare at her younger sister who bit down on her apple with yet another obnoxious crunch.

"you are jumping to a fast conclusion hija, i thought i raised you to use your head." eli chimed in when it seemed her eldest daughters rant had come to a ceasefire, alexia instead seething silently in her seat and scowling off into the distance.

"i saw her mami. i saw her. y sé lo que vi!" alexia grunted, biting the inside of her cheek and wishing as she could yank her heart from her chest and toss it as far away as possible.

alexia loathed that alba was right.

it had been almost four years and yet you never quite left her mentally the way you'd run away physically, always and forever occupying a sliver of her mind, sometimes pushed right to the back and forgotten temporarily.

then she'd see something, smell something, ignite some sort of sense and every hair on her body would stand on end, flooded with a bitter nostalgia.

if it be something as simple as a bunch of brightly colored poppies in a storefront, the melodic chime of a bell that sounded horrendously close to your laughter.

sometimes when she was alone and her mind drifted to you alexia could near feel the ghost of your touch lingering at the back of her neck.

it was as if with her eyes closed she could still imagine your slender digits raking through her hair, nails scratching ever so lightly against her scalp, a soft hum reverberating around her head where you'd have heard the snippet of a song in the elevator not quite able to place what it was.

but then reality sunk in, you weren't there, you couldn't be, and then the phantom fingertips turned cold and haunting, mocking alexia for letting her guard down, allowing a thick fog of delusion to deceive her.

humiliation seeping into the footballers bones she was shaking her head and hands about as if to ward off a bad spirit, the apparition of your false touch burning her skin with a cruel brand of what once was, and seemingly never would be again.

"i saw her too hija." eli added, focused again on chopping the peppers in front of her with a methodical precision.

"perdón? you saw her? you knew she was back? i cannot-mami when!" alexia spluttered out in a state of shock, eli's eyes never raising to meet the hazel ones which raked over her accusingly.

"when we were at the store. mami called out to her, spoke with her." alba chimed in, apple finished now and core sat abandoned in a tissue in front of her as the girl leaned back in her seat with a sigh.

"mami? es esto verdad?" alexias head swiveled back to the older woman who nodded with a hum.

"sí, her hair has grown out. she suits the natural look more, but she has always been a pretty girl." eli spoke as if referring to an old family friend, and not the sore spot ex flame of her eldest daughter who danced through alexias subconscious more than she would ever dare to admit.

"mami!" was all the blonde could manage to splutter with a scoff of disbelief. "vimos al bebé. yours would have been cuter!" alba added in with a shrug, eli looking up this time and fixing the brunette with an evil look.

"no metas a esa niña en esto, lo sabes bien!" eli warned firmly pointing the knife in her daughters direction who mumbled an apology and suddenly excused herself to the bathroom.

"mami..." alexia sighed tiredly, dragging her hands down her face and struggling to process everything. "her eyes hija, they were sad. she looked as if she could use a friend, a real one." eli stated solemnly as alexia peeked out through her fingers with a frown.

though when the silence grew longer eli looked up again, the very slightest raise of her eyebrow all that was needed for alexia to catch onto where she was going with this.

"qué? a mí?" the blonde choked out in shock, arms falling limply by her side as eli shrugged. "an old friend." the woman turned and opened the fridge as alexias mouth opened and closed wordlessly.

"an old friend? mami i asked her to marry me and she said no!" alexias body shot up from the table as her fist thumped angrily against the wood, eli sighing as she returned with an armful of vegetables.

"sí. but that was four years ago nena, and how long are you going to keep that memory locked prisoner in your head? you have been wanting closure for a long time, no?" eli questioned and not untruthfully as alexias chest tightened, hackles up and a defensive quip loaded and ready to fly from the tip of her tongue.

but then there it was, the ever so slight beat of hesitation, the pause all she needed to let the dust settle for a moment, the noisy hustle in her mind quietening down for just a second.

"you are angry, upset, confused. you have questions mija, and she will have answers." "mami, i can't." "you can't hija, or you won't?"

~

"qué hago aquí? idiota."

alexia scolded herself and exhaled shakily as the car engine shut off, silence around her somehow even noisier than the traffic just a few feet away, her limbs operating with a mind of their own as her keys slipped into her pocket, one foot hitting the asphalt.

this was beyond a dumb idea, this was borderline psychotic.

and yet, alexia moved forward, one step, two steps, three steps and then four. her feet moved again of their own accord as her car flashed and locked behind her, the warm evening air engulfing her body which felt doused in an invisible cold sweat.

five steps, six steps, seven, eight, nine, she'd crossed the road now, stood outside your old apartment building with her hands shoved deep into the pockets of her hoodie.

this was a horrible idea. a terrible, no good, poorly timed, not at all thought out and overall unacceptable use of her time.

yet her feet continued on. ten steps, eleven, twelve, thirteen and fourteen and she'd reached the elevator.

her eyes darted around nervously as if she was under attack, looking for an enemy she couldn't see but knew lay in wait, silent and deadly, ready to strike the very moment a crack in her walls appeared big enough for it to slither through.

the elevator closed and suddenly so did alexia's ability to breathe. the small room grew tinier, walls closing in, a wicked voice in her head urging her forward, its much quieter more rational sibling slain and silent, corpse rotting away in the back of her head.

then, a ding, doors open, her lungs filled with air and she trembled, a cautious step forward, one more ever so slight beat of hesitation.

but then, off she went. fifteen, sixteen, seventeen, eighteen, nineteen, and by number twenty five she was in front of your door.

well, really it could be anyones door.

this was a shot in the dark, an idea fired from a rusty old pistol which no matter which way alexia pointed it always seemed to end up trained to her own head, finger on the trigger and whatever consequence to come from pulling it hers to suffer.

you hadn't lived here in years so why was alexia so sure you were there? a mere few feet away as her shoes suddenly felt made from stone, her body rooted to the ground in front of the door she used to hold the key to, a key she kept on a chain right next to the one for your heart.

alexia wasn't sure if she'd ever returned that key, or if you still had one to hers, an invisible string tugging her feet a few inches closer and now if alexia even breathed too loudly she was terrified you'd hear from the other side.

all it would take was one second of bravery, a glimpse of courage, or perhaps...a moment of utter utter stupidity.

and yet, her knuckles rapped against the door and though meek the noise echoed around alexia's head like a gunshot, her knees suddenly wobbling and the panic button smashed in her mind, alarms blaring and neurons firing into overdrive.

leave, go, turn around, run. leave, go, turn around, run. leave, go, turn around, run. leave, go, turn around, run.

but the very moment alexia exhaled, left foot pointed ever so slightly outward and ready to back away and leave this most horrendous idea behind her, the door swung open and every last gasp of breath was snatched from her lungs.

"alexia?"