#look at the way it dangles... i'm losing myself to it

[marlenacantswim]

pawing at his perfect locks like a cat

[happyyyandcrazyyy]

matching bracelets (kaz brekker x reader)

summary: when (y/n) buys kaz a bracelet she does so as a joke, she knows he’ll never actually wear it. imagine her surprise when she sees it dangling around his wrist.

based on the prompt: person A gets person B a friendship bracelet, expecting person B to never wear it, but when it’s given to them person B puts it on and is rarely seen with it off.

warnings: mentions of blood and torture (not explicit, briefly mentioned)

kaz taglist: @the-tpd-bau @ellievickstar @thestudiouswanderer | soc taglist: @ancientbeing10 (if you want to be added or removed from the taglist just dm me!)

a/n: guess who's back after a year of being mia!! i've been working on a lot of fics, but inspiration just hasn't been there, so i'm going slow, i don't like to force myself to write if i don't feel like it. anywaysss, i hope you enjoy this one! it was such a fun ride to write :)

Jesper opens the door with a loud bang, strutting into the Slat with his head held high and a slight jump in his step. He’s whistling good-naturedly, his left hand twirling a pistol and his right hand holding a rumpled piece of paper.

(Y/N)’s right hand— which had immediately reached for the pocket knife in her boot at the tumultuous noise— retreats back to her side. She relaxes, letting her shoulders sag and briefly looking down to make the final correction on a contract Kaz had her look over, left hand holding the pen and swiftly moving over the paper.

Jesper makes his way towards her, still whistling. She follows him from the corner of her eye, a slight smirk taking over her features. He’s in a good mood, the kind of mood he’s only ever in when the Gods are in his favor and he manages to miraculously not gamble away all his money. It’s not something that happens often.

“Did you win some?” she asks, already knowing the answer but enjoying the way the Sharpshooter preens under the attention. Jesper, very much in character and to (Y/N)’s delight, twirls around and does a ridiculous dance before taking a small bow.

“Baby, I won a whole lot.”

She huffs out a laugh, leaning back as she watches him place the pistol in its respective holster before plopping down on the chair by her right side and tossing her a small bag.

(Y/N) catches it smoothly, reflexes as sharp as always.

She doesn’t need to open the sack to know there’s kruge in there; the sound of coins jiggling against each other is a dead giveaway.

Jesper winks, a teasing smile on his lips. He tips his chair back, feet on top of the table, “Because you’re my favorite.”

It’s really because he owes her more kruge than he’ll ever be able to repay, but (Y/N) plays along. She’s never cared much about money, anyways.

“You sure do know how to charm a lady,” she smirks.

“I’m good at charming gents, too.”

“Versatile.”

“You know me.”

(Y/N) smiles, softer around the edges this time, something reserved only for her closest friends. She’s about to being correcting another contact— she has twelve to go through, all because she’d been bored and had decided annoying Kaz would be a great way to spend her time, he obviously hadn’t agreed —when Jesper slides over the piece of paper he’d been holding in his right hand. In the time he’d made his way towards her he’d somehow managed to crumple it completely.

She takes it, half curious, half willing to do anything to procrastinate revising and correcting those stupid documents.

“Brought this for you, too. I’ve got the feeling you’re going to enjoy this much more than the money.”

Her eyebrows furrow with curiosity as she slowly opens up the paper.

Ink contrasts the yellowish hue of the paper. Her own face greets her, drawn by hand, but fairly accurate.

(Y/N) (Y/L/N)

Wanted dead or alive.

1,000 kruge.

She can’t help the snicker that falls from her lips

Jesper is right. This is better, much better.

“Can’t believe it’s only a thousand this time,” she huffs, a small pout on her lips. “I must be losing my touch.”

Jesper snorts at that.

(Because she hasn’t lost her touch, not even a little, and they both know it. Just yesterday she’d managed to get vital information out of a Black Tip member with a single touch and a minimal amount of bloodshed. Three days before that she’d disposed of a rival gang member who’d been speaking too freely and she’d made sure his body would never be found. Two weeks prior to that Kaz had sent her to steal a miniature stature and she’d done it without a hitch, forging an identical copy in less than five days. No, she still very much has it.)

“I might have to go overboard next time,” she muses quietly to herself, “do something that will raise the bounty to at least two thousand five hundred.”

She traces the outline of her name, biting down a smile when Jesper snorts.

“You’re insane,” the Sharpshooter deadpans, the fondness in his tone almost tangible.

(Y/N) smiles wickedly at him, “So they say.”

Marbles is what they’ve nicknamed her around the Barrel. They say she’s lost them all. And it must be true, she must be out of her mind, because having a bounty on your head in Ketterdam is nothing less than a death sentence. It means having the most ruthless assassins coming after you, all looking for a way to make fast money. It’s living with the constant fear of someone sneaking up on you and slicing your throat, of having your food poisoned, of being choked to death in your sleep, of having your closest friends betray you as a means to survive. But to (Y/N), who has been part of the city’s underworld since before being able to formulate words, who has had any sort of ability to feel fear beaten out of her, this is nothing but one of the most amazing sources of entertainment. It keeps her on her toes, brings an adrenaline rush that does not compare to anything else. She must be crazy because any sane person would be paralyzed in fear, running for their lives, and yet all she can feel is the comforting thrill of being in mortal danger. (And, yes, it is comforting. She was raised to be a weapon, trained to withstand any form of torture; having Death peering over her shoulder is something she’s comfortable with, something she’s used to, something that soothes her). Besides, even if she wasn’t deadly confident in her own abilities (which she very much is), and even if she was able to feel terror overtaking her limbs (which she doesn’t think she’ll ever feel again), the title she holds would be enough to keep her relatively safe; she is Kaz’s right hand, and no one dares touch something that belongs to Dirtyhands.

(Y/N) stares at the poster for a little while longer— they got her nose wrong, made it too pointy —before smirking to herself. She knows how this will all go down, has seen it played out a few dozen times before (this is a regular occurrence, after all, a bounty is placed on her head every couple of months, whenever she loses her temper and murders someone who was deemed untouchable, or steals something much too valuable for her blood-stained hands). So, yes, she knows how this will go; the bounty will stay up for a couple of weeks, long enough for a few to dare try to kill her, and then it’ll be removed by whoever placed it once they realize it’s futile, once they see how everyone who even dares breathe too close to her winds up dead. She hopes the assassination attempts are entertaining, she hopes whoever dares come after her head gives her a good fight, if only to keep things interesting. It’s been a while since she’s had some unrestrained fun.

(Kaz keeps her on a tight rein, knows better than to let her run around freely. To say things can get out of hand when she’s left to her own devices would be an understatement.)

“Again?”

The voice comes from behind her, and (Y/N) doesn’t need to turn around to know who it is, she heard his steps since before he even walked into the room. (It’s easy to know when it’s Kaz, he subconsciously places more weight on his left leg to keep the right one from aching, it makes his footsteps distinctive.) Still, she angles her head to meet his eyes. He’s leaning over her chair, cold eyes watching the bounty poster with disdain.

He’s never said it but (Y/N) knows that he doesn’t appreciate her life being imperiled. She is, in a way, an extension of him, and therefore any threats to her he sees as direct threats to him. Dirtyhands doesn’t take it well to being threatened.

“It’s okay, boss,” Jesper calls out. He’s still tipping his chair back, now playing with his guns. (Y/N) is kind of tempted to lean forward and kick one of the chair’s wooden legs, just to watch him struggle, possibly even fall. But Jesper’s known her long enough to realize when she’s on the verge of becoming a nuisance because his eyes narrow playfully and he lets the chair’s weight drop forward, “I wouldn’t worry too much.”

From the corner of her eye, (Y/N) can see the way Kaz’s face morphs. It’s almost indistinguishable, but she notices it. She thinks she would be able to spot the most minimal change in Kaz, she’s known him long enough for that. (Y/N) watches in amusement as he opens his mouth, no doubt to argue that he isn’t worrying at all, because Gods forbid he ever outwardly cared about anyone, but Jesper beats him to the punch and keeps going, “Heard some of Pekka’s Lions talking ‘bout how they’re not even going to try to come after her this time.”

“How boring,” she mutters to herself in disappointment, reaching for her glass of whisky. She’d meant for the comment to go unheard but Jesper’s snicker tells her that she wasn’t successful.

She takes a chug as Jesper points an accusatory finger at her and smirks, “That’s all on you, Marbles.”

At her bewildered look, he elaborates, “Two of them said something about not wanting to meet the same fate as the Razorgull guy from a couple of months ago—” (Y/N) smirks at that. The guy had deserved it. He hadn’t just tried to kill her, but also grope her. Murder she could understand, respect even, but touching someone else without their consent? No, she drew the line there. She’d had him swallow his own testicles; it’d seemed fitting enough. “—and the other one said that even if you hadn’t done that, he wouldn’t come close, not with you being Kaz’s right hand,” Jesper pauses for a second, a smug smile appearing on his lips, “and his best friend.”

Their reaction is instantaneous; Kaz goes rigid at the words and a smirk takes over (Y/N)’s features.

Oh, if the night didn’t just suddenly get better.

She glances up at her best friend, only to find him already glaring daggers at Jesper, who shrugs helplessly and innocently says, “Just telling it like I heard it, boss.” The flicker of amusement in his eyes reveals that he’s very much aware of just how much ammunition he’s provided (Y/N) with.

(Y/N)’s smirk becomes wider and gains a teasing edge when Kaz looks down to meet her eyes. His eyes harden, explicitly telling her to not utter a single word. Sadly for him, she has never been one to follow the rules, and Kaz must notice she’s not about to obey because his face morphs slightly, just enough to show the most minimum amount of discomfort. He cringes just the tiniest bit, bracing himself.

He knows her too well.

“You hear that?” she asks him, tone light and filled with amusement, “We’re best friends!”

“We are not,” Kaz tenses his jaw as he replies. He backs away from her, as if creating physical space between them will somehow stop the words from leaving her mouth and making their way towards him. As if distance could make her less of an bother.

(Y/N) fake gasps, clutching the skin over her heart in the most dramatic manner, “You wound me deeply, Kazzy.”

Jesper snorts, coughing to try to drown the laughter. She might be the only one who doesn’t get a knife to the jugular when calling him that.

Kaz’s eyes snap toward the Sharpshooter and the look must be deadly because Jesper quiets down immediately and tries his best to evade the boss’s glare. Kaz’s gaze then shifts towards (Y/N) and she perks up at the way his eyes harden even further in annoyance. He’s told her a million times to drop that ‘ridiculously stupid’ nickname and she’s decided she never will, not when it drives him to this point of exasperation.

(She’s a thrill chaser, you see. That’s what happens when you’ve seen just about everything and lived twice as much; few things get your heart pumping. And getting on Kaz’s nerves? That’s always exciting. (Y/N) never knows what to expect of him. The Bastard of the Barrel is unpredictable in a way that’s just delightful.)

“If you call me that one more time—”

“What are you gonna do? You can’t possibly try to hurt me. Best friends don’t do that to each other,” she mocks.

His eyebrow twitches, her grin stretches.

Oh, she’s going to have a field day with this one.

It’s obvious that Kaz knows he’s not winning this discussion because he walks forward, snatches the revised contracts and makes his way back to where he came from.

“Get those done before tomorrow afternoon.”

Boring. She was expecting more banter.

(Y/N) turns around to watch him leave, unable to stop herself from throwing a sarcastic, “Sure thing, bestie.” She does her best to sweeten the last word in a way that she knows will infuriate Kaz.

He freezes.

Bingo.

Even from afar, (Y/N) can see the way he tightens the grip on his cane. She’s thoroughly disappointed when he doesn’t throw a dagger her way. That would’ve been exciting. He takes another route, one she should’ve seen coming.

“I’ve got seven more files that need to be corrected. Collect them when you’re done with those.”

The corner of her lips tugs upwards slightly. There’s something thrilling about playing this game with Kaz, of seeing how much one of them can push before the other yields. He’s skilled and she enjoys the competition.

She ignores his order, “Goodnight, Kazzy.”

He slams the door on his way out, the only visible sign that she managed to get on his nerves. That’s mildly entertaining. Causing even the slightest slip of Kaz’s control over his temper is a success in her books.

“You’re out of your mind,” Jesper informs her.

She raises her glass of whisky at him and winks.

And that’s how it begins, as a joke. (Y/N) refers to Kaz as her best friend on every given chance. His reactions never disappoint.

There’s a lot of death threats;

(“Don’t mind him, bestie here is always grumpy.”

Clenched jaw, an exasperated sigh. “I will murder you.”

“Don’t tempt me with a good time, Kazzy.”

There’s a knife thrown her way. (Y/N) catches it with ease, whistling good-naturedly. She smirks when she catches the look of annoyance in Kaz’s face.)

and a lot of not so kind words thrown her way.

(“I get special best friend privileges, right?”

“You get tolerated,” Kaz mutters, “barely.”

“That might be the sweetest thing you’ve ever said to me. Now tell me you love me.”

There’s that Brekker glare, one that would send anyone to an early grave. (Y/N) just smiles sweetly.

“Get out.”

“Whatever makes you happy, best friend.”

She cackles as she closes the door behind her, the curses Kaz is sending her way loud enough for her to hear.)

All in all, (Y/N) is as happy as can be. Having the time of her life, really. It’s not often that she finds something that makes Kaz fume. He plays the game too, of course. He has her going over financial documents and legal contracts on her free time, knowing just how much she hates the bureaucracy, and he gives her the household chores she despises the most. Still, (Y/N) doesn’t complain. She does everything with a smug smile on her face. The annoyance that flashes through Kaz’s face makes it all worth it.

The bracelet isn’t something she plans for, it really isn’t, but the Saints place the opportunity right in front of her and who is she but a mere mortal that must obey the signs evidently laid by otherworldly deities (or whatever bullshit those religious fanatics preach).

(Y/N) inspects the wristlets in her hand. They’re black and rough, made of broken-down nets that fishermen dispose of near the pier when the material has worn down beyond repair and is no longer useful. The little girl who had sold it to her couldn’t have been older than seven, and yet the design was more than decent. (Y/N) had offered three kruge for it, much more than it was worth. The child had looked delighted, had thanked her profusely as she’d placed the coins inside her worn-down shoes.

Oh, (Y/N) cannot wait to see Kaz’s face.

“What’s that?” Jesper asks as she meets up with him, eying the bracelets with a gleam of interest. He twirls his guns absentmindedly, missing the way some of the fishermen glance at him with distrust.

“Oh, you know, just some matching bracelets for me and my best friend.”

Jesper snickers, shaking his head and proceeding to let out a low whistle.

“This might be his breaking point.”

“Wouldn’t that be delightful.”

“You’re insane, Marbles.”

She gives him a wicked smile accompanied by a wink. She’s about to retort when she catches sight of a shadow on the corner of her eye. She recognizes it immediately as her target. Shopping, as fun as it had been, wasn’t the reason she and Jesper were waiting by the pier. They’ve got orders. She has people to torture and interrogate and dispose of— preferably in a quiet manner —and Jesper is Kaz’s way of making sure she’s got her back covered. (Not that she needs backup, but whatever, she has tried arguing with Kaz about it and it’s the one thing he won’t relent on, the one matter she’s accepted she won't ever win. Kaz doesn't play when it comes to her safety.).

“If you’re kind enough to hold these for me,” she places the bracelets on Jesper’s unoccupied hand, “I’ll be back before you know it.”

They make it back to the Slat before sunrise. (Y/N) had been quick and efficient, as she always was, and Jesper had been a quiet and solid shadow, as he always was.

“I assume it all went according to plan,” the Bastard asks when he hears their steps coming into his office. It’s late, or rather extremely early in the morning, and yet (Y/N) isn’t surprised by Kaz’s presence. He rarely sleeps.

“It went without a hitch, boss,” Jesper responds, resting against the doorframe.

(Y/N) hesitates for a split second, her memory providing a brief flashback to the interrogation she’d done, to three little words the man had let slip out: they’re coming for you.

A warning or maybe a promise.

Thrilling, either way. It wasn’t often that she was verbally threatened.

At the time, she’d dismissed the words, too filled with bloodlust to pay them any mind, but now, with a clear mind and a steady heartbeat, she suddenly remembers her face plastered on paper all over Ketterdam and wonders if the words might be related to the bounty on her head.

Oh, she hopes so. That would prove to be fun.

They’re coming for you. Good. Let them try.

She nods her head in agreement with Jesper’s words. Kaz nods in approval and then jerks his chin Jesper’s way, a clear sign of dismissal. The Sharpshooter never walks into Kaz’s office after missions like this. He’s an escort, a babysitter of sorts, merely Kaz’s way of making sure she heads his way instead of making a beeline for her bed.

(Y/N) sticks her tongue out at him and Jesper blows her a kiss in response.

Lucky bastard. It’s always her that has to stay up to report. And she hates to admit it, but she’s tired, she can feel the exhaustion begin to creep on her bones and settle in. She has been up for more than thirty-seven hours at this point, and she can feel it catching up to her. Still, she knows that Kaz prefers to hear details when the information is fresh on her mind, when she can provide as much detail as possible, so she pushes through for him. She just has to wait a little while longer before crawling into her bed and passing out for the next twelve hours.

“Marbles comes bearing gifts by the way,” is the last thing the Sharpshooters says before exiting.

A smirk takes over her features, sleep, exhaustion and the new information briefly forgotten.

Kaz is going to hate it.

Lovely.

Kaz seems to sense, probably by the wicked amusement on her face, that whatever it is it’s not something he’s going to enjoy. His face twists into a scowl.

“Out with it, then.”

She pulls out the dark bracelet from her pocket as she walks towards Kaz, dangling it in front of his face when she’s close enough.

Jesper had handed them back on the way home, tossing them over as soon as she’d wiped the blood off her hands. He hadn’t said a word, but (Y/N) knew that the action had meant to snap her out of the weird haze that clouded her mind after every mission, where adrenaline still coursed through her body and all she could think about was bloodshed, fingers itching to kill and maim and fight.

(It was a thing, the haze. When taking lives there was nothing but calmness and bloodthirst, the restlessness that always lingered beneath her skin subsiding as soon as a weapon was placed in her hand and orders were given. And as soon as the mission was done, as soon as the target was neutralized and she’d efficiently fulfilled her orders, fogginess followed. Her mind became clouded, as if somewhat trapped in a loop of violence, every nerve on edge and ready for any threat to emerge.

She was brought up as a killing machine, a child soldier, the best out of all the assassins produced by the Silent Blades, her father’s pride. She was ruthless, wretched, or at least those had been the words used to describe her when she’d been a child. She supposed the dissociative state she slipped into was normal when considering her upbringing, some sort of psychological shield that kept her from going insane.

She never spoke about it, but the Crows somehow knew. They often eased her out of it, knowing full well that when trapped in that state she had not ounce of thought and only muscle memory to rely on, which made her infinitely more lethal.)

Jesper’s actions had worked like a charm. With something else to do with her hands, the fogginess had ruptured. She’d absentmindedly tied one of the bracelets on her own wrist, fingers playing with the edges of the other.

It’s that bracelet, the one on her arm, that Kaz glances at now. It’s brief, but for a split second the scowl etched on his face softens and something that she can’t quite catch passes through his eyes. It’s gone before (Y/N) can even begin to process it.

“Best friends have to have matching bracelets, don’t they?” And if she wonders about it later, she’ll blame it on the exhaustion, but the words come out softer than she intends them to. A jest, but not any less truthful.

Kaz’s face morphs and she gets a fleeting glimpse at that flicker in his eyes again. His scowl melts into something a tad bit gentler, the look contrasted by the aggressiveness with which he snatches the bracelet from her hand, “You’re the most annoying person I’ve ever met.” He means that and his tone has enough bite to make her cackle.

Amusing.

Placing her hands on her back pockets and shrugging, she responds, “That might be the nicest thing you’ve ever said to me.”

Kaz snorts, “Go take a bath.” He dismisses her, turning around and making his way to his desk, “Reports can wait until you don’t look half dead.”

That’s unexpected.

(Y/N) raises her eyebrows, “You’re being nice.” It isn’t often that Kaz forgoes a report after a mission. He might’ve been more touched by the gift than he’s letting on.

“It’s for my own sake,” he retorts, not turning around, “you just stink and it’s making me nauseous.”

She does have a lingering smell of blood and sea water.

“Everything in this damned place stinks,” she responds. I know you’re lying, she’s saying, I know you’re being kind.

“Get out.”

“Sir, yes, sir,” (Y/N) mocks, walking out of his office.

She sleeps a full day after that, everyone knowing better than to bother her unless they want to lose to their head, and when she reports to Kaz the next morning the three words she’d heard from the man slip her mind. (Y/N) doesn’t remember them until a few weeks later when she’s tied to the ceiling by her wrists, face bleeding.

Now, she must admit, she’s impressed. No one had ever tried kidnapping before. There’d been more attempts on her life than she could even count; stabs resulting in blood being shed, never one drop of hers, poison that she had either swallowed down like a champ or identified before a single lick of it touched her tongue, because being raised an assassin meant she’d been trained in the art of toxins and she’d built up tolerance to pretty much every substance in existence, and that one time they’d tried to shot at her, which only resulted in (Y/N) stealing Jesper’s gun and placing a bullet right between the perpetrator’s eyebrows. All in good fun. Kidnapping was new, but only because those who had attempted on her life had never tried joining forces, all of them wishing to keep the financial reward for themselves.

Torturing, that was new, too.

She could endure, of course she could, she’d been trained for this. That did not mean she’d missed it.

The poster had stated she was wanted dead or alive and it was clear that the man in front of her wanted to take his time. It was personal, she could tell by the brunt of his hits and the delicate precision of his cuts. Had she been anyone else, she would’ve been begging for it to stop, but (Y/N) was a Silent Blade, even if she’d left the organization and that life behind, and she would never break.

The only reason she was in this situation was because the assailants had gotten the upper hand. They’d used one of (Y/N)’s street urchins— a little girl with piggy tails and two missing teeth, one of the ones who gathered information for (Y/N) and traded it for food and shelter —as leverage. And time had apparently made her soft because she’d hesitated. The brief second of doubt had been everything they’d needed.

Them subduing her didn’t mean she’d gone down without a fight. There’s been five of them in the beginning. Only three remained. She’d plucked one guy’s eye out, going deep sever the optic nerve and cause brain damage, and she’d ripped the other’s ear with her teeth before slitting his throat. She’d managed to stab one of the three men remaining with a dagger before being injected with some unknown serum. It hadn’t knocked her out, not the way it was supposed to if the incredulous look on her kidnapper’s face was any indication, but it had drugged her enough to allow them to overpower her.

And now here she was, slowly bleeding out.

“I intent on handing your corpse to them and claiming the reward.” He’s been quiet for so long that (Y/N) had almost forgotten his presence. She doesn’t raise her head, only looks up. It’s hard to do so when her right eye is swollen shut. “But they never specified the conditions it had to be in.”

The man has his back towards her, fingers running through a box of tools. He’s used almost all of them on her by this point. Amateur. A skilled torturer knows to go slow, to drag it out, to choose a weapon and stick to it until the person is weeping and screaming.

“It was my brother that you killed.”

That sparks her interest, a smirk taking over her bloodied lips. She looks at him, dead in the eye.

“Which one?” she taunts.

The sound of her voice, still strong despite the blood loss, startles him. He freezes for a split second, hand over a wooden baseball bat.

“What?”

She snickers, blood dripping into the floor. “I’ve killed a lot of men, darling.” The way he seethes, fury filling his features, amuses her. “So which one was your brother?”

“You had him swallow his own testicles.”

“Oh, him,” she nods her head in appreciation. “Can’t say I regret it.”

Now he’s fuming, hand shaking so badly he almost loses the grip on the bat. If (Y/N) looks close enough she can see the resemblance. Same brown hair, same nose, same crazy look in their eyes.

“I’ll make you regret it.”

“You can certainly try,” she concedes mockingly. Because, honestly, there’s nothing he can do to her that she hasn’t already withstood.

There’s a raging roar and then a burst of pain. A hit to her abdomen, which no doubt bruised a rib, and then two to her back. But it’s okay, she thinks to herself as she wheezes and coughs, trying to regain air in her lungs, she knows how to play this game and how to win it. Keep him talking, keep him angry, let him think he has the upper hand, keep him from noticing how she’s preparing to break free.

“I wonder…” he murmurs, bat dragging behind him. “You’re not particularly remarkable.” She scoffs as he begins circling her, a tactic supposed to drive the prisoner into panic at the lack of vision of their assailant. Her heart doesn’t stutter. She’s trained to identify people and objects by sound not sight. She knows precisely where he is, even if she can’t see him. “So, what makes you interesting enough for the Bastard to keep so close?”

She grins, feral and with bloodstained teeth.

“Why don’t you come closer and I’ll show you?”

His face does not change but his step falters. “You cannot believe me stupid enough to fall for that.”

“You were stupid enough to tie my wrists with handcuffs,” is all she replies before dislocating her own thumbs and releasing herself from the shackles.

She hits the floor hard, body swaying for a second. Her hands are numb, nerve endings frayed. It hits her, now that she has to keep herself outfight, just how much blood she’s lost. The edges of her vision blur.

There’s a cut on her thigh, it bleeds heavily. Her back is all flayed skin. Breathing is hard.

It doesn’t matter. She only needs four fingers and half a mind to hold and use a dagger. She shakes the dizziness off.

He comes at her, but she’s expecting that. Sidestepping him is easy, kicking him in the back as he passes by even more so.

“You’re not much without your friends and a syringe full of drugs, are you?” she stumbles a little as she taunts him. Time is not on her side, she knows this. He’s cut deep in her arms and legs, no major artery touched, but with precision to give her a slow and prolonged death. She’s been steadily bleeding for hours.

(Y/N) has to end this. Soon.

He comes for her again, and she dodges, punching him right in the gut. He feigns left and she moves away, noticing too late the fist that impacts with the right side of her face. Despite the pain, she manages to stomp his toes and slam her knee against his balls.

That does it.

A high whimper leaves his mouth and as he struggles for air, she backs up. Keeping her eyes on him, her right arm reaches back to the toolbox. She knows what she’s grasped as soon as her fingers graze it.

“Say hi to your brother for me.”

The scalpel lodges itself right on his carotid artery.

“Nice,” she mumbles in delirium as she hears him choke to death. It’d been a majestic throw.

The adrenaline is gone in a second. (Y/N) stumbles backwards, barely aware of all the tools scattering around in the floor. She lets herself rest against the wall, slowly sitting down on the floor.

She’s going to die.

It doesn’t matter that she’s managed to get rid of that poor excuse of a man. She’s too injured. She knows.

(Y/N) isn’t scared. She’s tangled with Death for a long time, and as cold begins to creep in and the edges of her vision blacken, it feels like welcoming an old friend. It feels like getting what she has always had coming for her.

The tips of her fingers begin to tingle, her body’s desperate effort at keeping her heart pumping. Her ears are ringing, hard enough that when shouts begin all that she can hear are muffled sounds.

Then someone’s touching her face. She greets the warmth.

“Fuck,” she hears as she tumbles forward, her forehead landing on a collarbone. Jesper grasps the back of her head, fingers tangling in her hair. At least, she thinks it’s him. Her brain feels mushy, but her nose has never failed her, and it smells like gunpowder and mint.

She’s laid down on the ground gently, probably to inspect her injuries before moving her.

“You’re going to be okay,” the Sharpshooter reassures her, but his voice is trembling. He’s scared. She must look worse than she feels, and she feels like she’s been attacked by a group of Heartrenders.

She wants to speak, to tell him it’s okay, but opening her mouth feels like an impossible task.

“Save your energy.” That’s Kaz. His voice is steady, but she can feel the underlying tension, the worry in his words. “You are not dying tonight.” And he says it with so much conviction, like he would hold her soul with his own hands to keep it anchored to her body, like he would keep her heart beating with pure willpower.

Her eyes look for him, but she catches sight of something else entirely.

“You’re wearing it.”

She must make no sense, words slurred, but Kaz understands. His whispered words are the last thing she hears before slipping out of consciousness.

“How couldn’t I?”

Then there’s nothing. She loses track of time. She comes back to her body from time to time, able to hear words but incapable of pinpointing the speaker. She’s floating, but there’s pain and aching.

“…too much blood, I don’t know…”

“…keep her alive.”

“I am trying!”

“Don’t try, do it.”

“…punctured lung, broken ribs…”

“…don’t know how she’s still alive.”

When she comes to the first thing that she feels is blinding pain. Everything hurts. Her muscles complain as she sits up. She clenches her jaw to keep the tears at bay. The worst is already over, she will not cry.

“Don’t move,” (Y/N) freezes at the command, her head snapping towards the voice. “Nina stitched you back together, I doubt she would be very happy to see all her hard work ruined.”

She gently eases herself back on the bed, fingertips running over her bandaged stomach. She can feel the edges of the stitches poking through it. It must’ve been bad, then, if she required stitches to keep the wound together. Usually, she’s a fast healer, a result of all the training she’d gone through.

“How long?” Her voice is raspy after not being used. Her throat hurts, which might be related to the way she was choked to the verge of unconsciousness several times while held hostage.

“Four nights.”

Bad then.

(Y/N) can feel Kaz’s eyes on her, assessing. She meets his stare, and it’s when she’s looking at him that a vague memory comes back.

Her eyes drift down to his wrist.

The twin bracelet to her own, the one she keeps tightly wrapped around her wrist, as if part of her own skin, greets her.

“You are wearing it.”

Kaz frowns in confusion, until he follows her line of sight. He looks away, hand clenching and unclenching over the head of his cane.

“Even after almost dying you’re still insufferable,” he responds.

But when he looks back at her, (Y/N) can see everything in his eyes.

How could I not, he’d said, and he’d meant it. If friendship was something that could bloom in a wretched place like Ketterdam, Kaz was her best friend and she was his, even if they’d never discussed it, even if they would never admit it. You’re the steady order to my unrelenting chaos, she thought to herself, someone I would follow to the end of the world.

He nods, as if reading her mind and agreeing with her.

“Rest.” That’s an order, one she has no intention of disobeying.

“Sure thing,” she responds as Kaz makes his way towards the door, “bestie.”

(Y/N) can feel the amusement in his words, “Absolutely insufferable.”

She smirks, toying with the ends of the bracelet’s strings.

(Y/N) never takes it off. Neither does Kaz.

[moonselune]

hiii it's revivify anon again (can I be 🐶anon?)

ahhhh your takes for the male companions reactions are so real!!

as a galemancer myself, I absolutely see him going the god route to bring them back. he's probably spin it as something like, "it was my ambition to bring you back. Therefore, i am allowed" (honestly, I could see him becoming so much darker if he brings back his fallen love. He'd probably keep them in a gilded cage of sorts. Always saying that he has their best interests at heart, that he's better and more reliable than all other gods. That no one, god or mortal, could love you better than him, so you should worship him just as much as he worships you... man... the potential.)

Thinking about astarion losing his love just hurts because like... they came and healed his heart only to shatter it all over again? If it was BEFORE the cazador fight, I think he'd definitely ascend himself. Why worry about losing your soul when you've already lost your heart? If it was after the cazador fight, I think he'd just kick himself for letting you convince him not to do it, and eventually circle back to the idea that he should've ascended. Maybe then, he could've saved you....

Oh, Wyll.... I get what you mean about not wanting to immediately go down that route of trading his soul to another Patron. I think if Mizora caught wind, she'd absolutely taunt him with it. Always hanging around like a bad smell, dangling the chance to bring his love back as long as he signs away his soul in a Pact eternal with her. I think as long as he had his friends around, he would be able to stand firm and remember that his lover would've shattered at the idea of him sacrificing himself. I'm not sure if I'm misreading his character or not, but I'm pretty sure he wouldn't take another lover. He'd probably 1) blame himself for the loss of their life, and 2) think he isn't worthy of love again, and 3) probably love them until he dies tbh. He wouldn't want another lover, because they wouldn't be his lost love :'(

DARK HALSIN!!! Girl... your mind.... you are so onto something. I could totally see him going shadow druid tbh. He'd probably stop and be like, "you know what? Maybe they were right. Maybe I should've embraced the shadows. Maybe I still should..." or like, if people venture far enough into the woods, they might come across a corpse perfectly preserved as if theyre just sleeping, reeking of druidic magic. There's tons of plants surrounding the body. Some consider it a holy site, some consider it cursed. But all agree not to linger too long, lest the beast that guards it finds you...

CW: Dark Content

Of course 🐶 nonnie !

Oh my god yes yes yes yes, I have done a galemancy run and it was one of my favourites. The way this man would be like "I am doing nothing wrong" and there's just a pile of bodies behind him because he keeps messing up this necromancy spell that requires a sacrifice. Oh my lord and when it finally works and you are alive, back and well. He is overjoyed and is like my love! You have returned! Don't look at all the blood and bodies, just come this way my love! No the outside world will harm you, my love, just follow me! Look at this room it has all your favourites! Those windows have never opened my love, here's your favourite tea!

And he is NEVER going to let it go that he brought you back- ever. You are his masterpiece, the fruits of all his labor, the perfect embodiment of his ambition. He is your creator, you, the perfect creation. You belong to him. You will watch him ascend and you will take your place below beside him.

Resisting is pointless, you wouldn't want to go back to that cruel afterlife. Maybe if you are being particularly ungrateful, you would like a taste of what he rescued you from? Sending you into a spiral of nightmares until all you can do is cling to him in fear. He strokes your hair as you cry and murmurs how all he did was save you from this and you want to defy him? Hurt him by saying all those cruel words?

Well shit this is gonna end up as a fic isn't it?

YES, pre cazador, definitely would ascend and I can go see him going after people who look like you but as soon as they do/say something that is out of character for you, he just murders them. Justifying it by saying if you don't get to live, then neither do the poor imitations of you.

If he didn't ascend I reckon he would make a deal for him to get some sort of power, as you said, his heart died with you, what does he need a soul for? And then that takes us back to his ascended behaviour.

Oh baby boy Wyll, I agree, I do not think he would take another lover, but he would move on, I can see him becoming Grand Duke and shaping Baldur's Gate into a City that you would have survived in. He would name so many things after you, you liked books? He would build a library in your name? You always said you wanted kids or a big family, he builds an orphanage for you, telling the children stories of you. I think eventually as Wyll gets older and Mizora still tries to tempt him, he eventually enjoys her presence - as every time she tries to lure him into darkness, he can hear his beloved guiding him back to the light, and that he would never give up. Mizora is like wtaf, fine, you will never see me again, and then she's bored and shows up.

Dark Halsin !!! We love you !! He would have such a guilt complex about the shadow druids, how they were right etc. AND YES OMG you read my mind, parents warn their kids not to play too deep into the forest and for those wayward ones they come back, trembling with fear as they say how the beast roared and swiped its sharp paw at them. (Halsin would scare them away, I can never imagine him being violent with kids). But for those trying to prove their strength and valour by rescuing the beautiful maiden - they are never seen again.

Oooooo I cannot wait to sink my teeth into this!

[cozymoko]

I seen your anime list and found out you do vampire knight can you do yandere platonic with kuran family? With dimension hopping darling ? She haven't seen the series and just think of them as random cosplayee stuck in snow?

YANDERE PLATONIC KANAME KURAN

Synopsis: Isekai child reader relives a day inside the yandere Kuran household. But thinks it's all a dream.

P.S — sorry if this is all over the place, I started losing my mind mid thing.

Pairing: Kuran family x fem! child reader

Format: Mini scenario, 2nd person

Word count: 1.9k

WARNING(S): Yandere themes

This was not your home.

It couldn't be. 

No, not here. 

You were sitting on a long leather couch, one of many that were placed evenly across the room. A chandelier dangled above you, emitting a soft, golden light upon your seated figure. 

It was clear this was someone else's memory, even so, your ability to move surprised you. 

You started at the warm cup of tea resting in your hands, dazed and bits of fatigue flickering across your expression. Your polished shoes just barely reached the marble flooring which just didn't seem right. 

Instinctively, you take one hand from the cup, examining yourself further. Your hands were small, much smaller than you'd remembered. And so were your legs; short and just barely reaching the floor. Who's goddamn legs were these? 

“[Name], are you alright?” You jumped at the deep, sultry voice, lifting your eyes to meet the concerned gaze of the man towering over you. 

You thanked the gods for it being your mother tongue, but even so, his words proved to be a bit foreign. They weren't exactly modern or anything like the dramas that consumed the media of your world. It reminded you of the nobles that filled the old books back in Tokyo, but even their speech wasn't this strange.

You nod your head, slowly, as though you were unsure. The man didn't look too convinced before he took a seat at your side. His chocolate hair was brushed neatly to the back though just barely passing his ears. He adorned a blue silk button-up with a beige trench coat draped over his broad shoulders. 

He didn't seem convinced. 

“Father, what's the matter? Why're you watching her so closely?”

A lean figure emerged from the shadows as though he was a part of them. He was a replica of the man whom he called "father", but mildly shorter with hair that reached the back of his neck. 

" Kaname," He started, his gaze not once leaving you. "I'm afraid that [Name] may be Ill, it's not like her to just stare off into space like this.“

" I see..."

Am I not here? Can I not speak for myself? 

You parted your lips in hopes of saying your piece, hit alas you were interrupted by the loud patters of feet coming your way. 

A young girl sprinted to your side, successfully beating what you assumed to be her older brother to the couch. She clung to your arm, snuggling into the thick fabric of your sweater. Jovial giggles bubbled in her throat as she held you unbelievably tight. 

“Now, Yuki, if [Name] truly does feel unwell you mustn't smother them.” Kaname scolded, gently tugging the young girl from your side. A deep look of displeasure flashed across his eyes but only for a moment as he reached to adjust your wrinkled clothes. 

Yuki pouted rather childishly, yet her shame was evident in her round eyes. “Sorry big sister! Please don't be upset.”

Upset? You nearly snorted, just what was there to be upset over? It was as though your questions were answered when you met his gaze, laced with envy and slight disappointment.  Oh, so this guy's a jealous one, huh? 

If you had to guess, he'd rather be him bruh in your arms than her.

Pfft, just how old was this guy anyways?

You were hardly given the time to marvel over your thoughts before a decently tall woman emerged from a cracked door to your right.

"My poor baby!” She cried out. “You hardly get sick, what's the matter?”

God damn, did you even have models this beautiful in your world? You doubt it. Her long hair descended her back with a few strands framing her slim face. She reached out and gently touched your cheek, her fingers as light as a feather. 

“Mother I'm fine, I promise.”

The words slipped through your lips before you knew it, almost like second nature as you gently removed the woman's hand from your unnaturally cold skin. 

“May I get some fresh air? Maybe that'll help me.”

The troubled looks on their faces rendered you silent — guilty even. 

Your lips shut as fast as they had opened, your body shifting uncomfortably under their prying eyes. Something about their looks made you feel off, as though they wanted to tear you limb by limb to keep you from escaping. 

“Sorry...” You whispered, wishing desperately to get out of this situation. “I'll just go to sleep early I suppose. Ka...name, can you take me?”

That's right, you didn't know where your room was, and seeing as you were somewhat in control of this body it was much-needed information. That man's name felt bitter on your tongue like forbidden fruit hanging from a sacred tree, you had almost forgotten it, thankfully you had not. 

Nonetheless, he looked more than just a little happy to escort you. Maybe a bit too much for your liking. His eyes glistened in mild admiration and he reminded you of a prince in an eerie sense. 

How fucking old are you anyway? I mean, he hadn't suspected a thing! 

“Follow me closely, you seem to enjoy getting lost in these halls.” He chuckled. 

Welp, that answers your question. 

You tailed him like a lost puppy, just barely standing inches from his feet. You touch your lips, feeling the sharp fang nearly poking from them. So I must be one of them too? What kind of sick joke is this? 

You look up at the concealed back of your "brother", listening to the soft clicks of your shoes as they mingled in the halls. His eyes glanced behind him ever so often to make sure you were still there. And you were sure he noticed you staring. 

So are all of these people into cosplaying? 

“Rest well,” He whispered, his warm breath faintly grazing your forehead before giving it a tender kiss. “You gave us quite the scare.”

Kaname ushered you into the room, not the slightest bit put off by your quietness. You weren't tired, you had just woken up. And yet a wave of fatigue has washed over you like a raging tsunami, your body staggered its way to the shelter mattress almost instinctively before you collapsed. 

The darkness was short-lived. 

Your fatigue is gone. 

Your eyes shoot open, but not as your doing. 

The scene changed. 

Your clothes were different. 

You were drawn to believe you were in another cliche as your clothes had indicated. Still formal with a Victorian touch. You could hardly collect your thoughts before they were (rudely) interrupted once more. 

“My child, please forgive me for I love you dearly...” A voice lamented. 

The woman this body called "mom" had kneeled before you. Her face was saturated in deep rogue, its tempting, metallic aroma wafting at your nose. She trembled, holding you tightly in your arms as though she was afraid to let you go. 

You felt restricted and scared. 

Your breathing was delayed. 

Your heart hammered against your ribcage. 

You wanted out of this situation now and there was no denying it. 

“Mother, w...what are you doing?” That wasn't you, but you were no less curious than the child who said it. 

Her lightly chapped lips made contact with your forehead. A chaste yet tender kiss goodbye to what it seemed to be. She gripped your shoulders in a possessive manner as though she didn't want to let go. 

An aching pain drummed against your head. If not for your mother's presence you were sure you would collapse. It felt like you were being torn limb from limb — bit by bit — piece by piece. Your vision blurred significantly, causing you to lean on her chest. 

Her crazed eyes stared back at you, sad and yet confident. She wished to care for you even after death but she knew it'd be selfish of her. 

“I love you so much.” She smiled. “Even if you don't remember me.”

All you could see is black. 

The warmth is gone. 

You're cold, so terribly cold. 

It was biting. 

And you had begun to feel numb. 

What was happening now? 

Drowning you in a thick blanket of ice. Pale white butterflies descended from above before disappearing in the snow. You would have found them beautiful if not for the circumstances. 

The shitty, unlikely circumstances. 

You hugged your short legs to your chest in a pitiful attempt to regain warmth. You had still inhabited the body of a child. Yet your lack of mobility proved to be a greater nuisance than the cold itself. The jade puffer coat draped over your shoulders had already deemed itself useless.

You were hopeless. 

Lost. 

Confused. 

Scared. 

Hopeless. 

Hopeless. 

Hopeless—! 

Amidst the unforgiving blizzard stood a man. Flecks of snow zipped across your vision so much that you could not see. 

“You smell delicious...“ The man slurred, slowly staggering towards you. “Give me...your blood...”

It hadn't registered at first. You had merely thought he was drunk out of his mind and nothing more. You shook your head, pushing your body further from the deranged man. Another action that wasn't of your doing. 

You involuntarily shivered under his deranged expression. You swore at the circumstances, the feelings you were experiencing. The atmosphere no longer felt light and airy as it did in the manor, you felt more alive. You could practically feel the blood coursing through your veins and it scared you even more than you could've imagined. 

“I said...give me your blood—Ack!”

Right, you'd almost forgotten about him. 

In one blink his body had met the ground. Streams of blood-forming an unruly puddle beneath him. You scoffed; served him right. But fear has swelled within you once more in such unforeseen circumstances. 

Who killed him?

Your strangely heightened senses no longer surprised you as you peer up to greet your savior. His eyes were all too familiar beside the rouge that swam through them. The warm chocolate color was no more as his eyes mimicked the blood dripping at his fingertips. 

“[Name],” The man sighed in great relief. “must you always worry me so much?”

The previous events left your mind hazy and even blurred. As you soon recognized this man to be your brother, Kaname. You run your tongue across your lips, jumping at the absence of the pointed fangs you'd once had. 

“Oh my, you must be terrified right now. My mistake, I didn't want things to happen this way.” He reached out, gently caressing your cheek with his clean hand. His slender fingers felt like needles against your numb skin. 

“If only I'd made it earlier. Perhaps I could have saved you from such unnecessary trauma.”

You snorted. Yeah, maybe. 

“Come now. I'll take you to somewhere safe." He whispered, reaching a hand out to you. “I won't allow anyone to hurt you again.”

You grab his hand, stubby fingers tangled within his own. You despised that warmth it brought you; the solace, the security. But what choice did you have? You were lost with nowhere to go. 

Your "life" had just flashed before your eyes. Those memories were not anyone else's but your own. They were vampires, all of them including yourself. And it was evident that the man immersed in the snow had wanted you dead. 

The pain you experienced with your "mom."

The crazed looks in their eyes. 

The excessive isolation. 

The blood staining his pale fingers. 

It was all too real. 

That's when you realized...

This wasn't a fucking joke.

[heyidkyay]

And I'm petrified of being alone, now |

Part Nine

Matty Healy x reader

Summary: She’s just trying to get by, really. What with being a single parent to her four year old son whilst simultaneously trying to kick start a successful career as a radio presenter. She’s got everything she’s ever wanted though, friends close by, a mum who’s merely a phone call away, and of course her baby boy. What else is there to wish for? But then, it’s not long before her relatively normal life gets upended and turned on its head, and she’s suddenly forced to deal with situations she’s never even thought to imagine.

What happens when one mention of a certain controversial singer on her show sends a flood of unexpected challenges her way? 

Authors Note: Part Nine!! Hope you lot like this one! Thank you so much for all the love its been shown, means a whole lot xx

Warnings: Scene that involves a lot of sudden panic and themes of possessive violence (Nothing too graphic, promise!), drinking but it's to be expected tbh

Masterlist

The pavement outside of the bar was grounding. A solid presence beneath my unsteady feet. 

I let that feeling engulf me as I wandered a little further down from the club doors to press my back against the outer wall. The brick became a tether, I felt the grain of its grit against the leather of my jacket, the way its chill pooled across the back of my head, its rough ridges latching onto the hair that fell there.

It had been the briefest of seconds, a startled glance shared between us both before I had ripped myself away. Knowing that I’d only somehow lose myself in those eyes of his if I lingered a second too long.

But Matty had been all too bashful and almost completely unaware of my presence, so over the top in his greetings to everyone else that he had virtually made it too easy for me to slip straight past his guard and out into the night.

Now, alone, I dragged in a ragged breath. The feverish wisp of the evening air swirled around my tongue, only to then wind its way down the back of my throat. It helped to somewhat still my trembling hands.

Then, almost frantically, I moved to rifle through the pockets of my jacket in search of a pack of fags, or perhaps a lighter- practically desperate to find another means of escape. My mind wouldn’t stop its endless spinning.

I didn't get the chance though, not when the person I'd all but bolted from came tumbling out of the doorway a few feet away, dazed smile paired with a pair of sharp cutting eyes.

"There she is!"

I swallowed thickly just as my head snapped left to meet Matty, who was now making his merry way over, hands tucked in his trousers as he grinned amiably at me. Like everything was fine. Normal.

"Was beginning to think you'd done a runner!"

He didn't look much different from the last time I had seen him, which oddly felt so long ago now. That day in the cafe and then by the tube station. But still, there was something unfamiliar about the jaunty way he now held himself. It was a little too confident, arrogant almost. I wasn't sure how to interpret it. If I was even supposed to.

"No. Just needed some air." I replied, a breath of relief escaping me when my fingers finally wrapped around the familiar feel of cardboard. I pulled the carton out to distract myself from his overwhelming presence and plucked a cigarette from its contents before then extending it outwards. It felt impolite not to offer.

Matty only bared his teeth at me in a grin, as charming as ever, before he leant forward to snag another from the casing. I fumbled then for a lighter, patting myself down in search of it. 

I needn't have bothered though because I blinked and then there was a flame, unwavering in the wind as Matty dangled it carelessly just under my nose. 

My eyes sought his and I wet my lips before making room for the filter.

Matty leaned in closer and I hunched slightly so that I could burn the cigarette’s end, but as I did I continued to observe Matty, his stance, the mask he wore, whilst the fancy chrome lighter worked its magic.

I didn't know exactly where my heart was in that precise moment, but it definitely wasn't in my chest. It was climbing up my throat, pounding against my skin, hammering in my ears. 

I hadn't really noticed it before but now, just being around Matty- especially when not entirely sober- was a somewhat difficult task for me to endure. The man was every sort of red flag rolled up into one being, the kind of person I knew I was better off just staying away from. 

Because people like Matty tended to lure the likes of me in, with their charming smiles and cutting eyes. 

The perfect sort of trap that left you helpless, stranded.

Right then, it almost seemed as though Matty had the power to read every insulant or incriminating thought that had ever crossed my mind. As though all of it was written as clear as day across my face.

Matty took a long drag of his cigarette and propped himself up against the wall beside me, a little too close for current comfort but I couldn't really find it in myself to pull back now.

"Seemed like you couldn't get away fast enough." 

He said it so nonchalantly that I was a little unsure on how best to answer, whether Matty was honestly offended or not by my sudden departure. But before I could even think up a reply, Matty was already striving on.

"But, I can only imagine- must've been more than awkward to see the object you've been ignoring for, well fuck knows how long, standing right there. Within reach."

Matty turned his infamous grin on me then, but my breath had already been caught by the unbidden emotion in the man's eyes. 

"I-" I tried but Matty merely shrugged me off, cigarette ash flailing as he did.

"Don't need an excuse, babe. I get it. I can be a bit much at times- clingy, I reckon’s the right word."

I choked a little on my next drag but immediately started to shake my head. "No, no- honestly, Matty. It wasn't like that."

Matty levelled me with an odd look, but said nothing more.

"Look, I promise. Alright? It’s just- I've had a lot on recently. Everything's been fucking stressing me out, more so than usual, and it's all just. Well, it's all just sort of gotten on top of me." 

Knuckling the side of my eye in frustration, I tugged a hand through my hair, hating myself for the way I couldn't even seem to worm my way out of this one. For the dejected look that sat so blatantly on Matty's face. 

"I am really not saying this right." I huffed out unhappily before I dropped my fag and stamped the remaining cherry out.

Matty merely snorted and I pressed my lips together to keep from biting and instead took a breath, turning to him.

"I'm sorry." Is what I apparently decided on, and felt almost as surprised as Matty looked when the words bypassed my lips. But in truth, I found that I really was sorry for making Matty feel as though he was to blame here. And for whatever other idiotic thing Matty might've told himself as to why I’d been acting like a right bitch lately.

Matty looked at me for a long pause, his hand stilled in midair between us, and I really wasn't very sure how to take the small smile that tugged at his lips a moment later.

"No need for apologies. Honestly. Well, only if you're planning to continue ignoring my messages after all this." Matty quipped and he laughed lightly when he caught my expression, blowing a cloud of smoke out of the side of his mouth.

I felt looser having heard his reply though, and tried for a smile.

"No. No, I wasn't planning on it."

"Good." Matty nodded and I really appreciated the way his face brightened when he did so. But I knew I’d never tell him. "Now! Are you going to buy me a drink for all of my troubles, or am I going to have to bribe that grumpy ginger mate of yours? Who’s even that sodding tall anyway?"

A startled laugh bubbled up from my chest and I couldn't for the life of me even think to decline the ask when Matty was looking at me like that, eyes shining under the streetlamp light, cheeky smile brightening his entire being.

"I'd like to see you try."

I quietly waited for Matty to finish the remnants of his cigarette before I followed the singer back inside, feeling the humidity of the cramped club pool over me the moment we bypassed the entrance.

Matty grabbed at my hand just as we slid by the highly intoxicated hen-do party who were crowding the doors. The action was done without merely a second thought, which wedged that heart of mine up into the walls of my throat and left me almost unaware as Matty continued to lead me through the rest of the crowd. 

His fingers wrapped effortlessly around my own and I clung to them like an anchor to the ocean floor. Struggling greatly to suppress the bubbling urge to play with the large metal ring that adorned Matty’s index finger.

"Oi, I thought you'd left!" Came a booming voice from over my left shoulder, it resonated around us once Matty and I had finally reached the bar.

It was on impulse that I glanced over in its direction and gaped at the sudden appearance of Auley, who's blue eyes were keen but playful, taking the situation in. It was Matty though, who replied, face turned up into a cocky grin as he subtly observed the incoming target.

"It seems,” He said, “That Squeaks here cannot say no to the likes of me."

Matty’s fingers were still grasping mine, I noted then, and was merely grateful for the way the bar's dim yellow lights were able to cover up the faint blush that had crawled up my neck. That statement had only strengthened it though, it seemed. Because, in all honesty, it felt like more than just a partial truth. 

The laughter that followed from Auley was brash and unavoidable, and he made sure to catch my gaze.

"Ah, I see!" Auley winked at me as he went to grab at the large tray of drinks the barman passed him. "Must be those devilishly good looks of yours, mate."

I hated feeling so wrong-footed so I shot back, "Or, maybe his charm."

Auley smirked just as I ducked my head. "I'll let everyone know you're stickin' around then, Mouse. Join us, yeah?"

Before I could dissuade him, to rewrite the picture he’d decided on in his head, the tall ginger had already dived back into the crowd, his head bobbing along to the song playing overhead as he sailed his way through. Everyone back at the table would know that I’d stuck around soon enough.

"What're you drinking then?"

Blinking, I spun back to face Matty and found a busty barmaid waiting on his reply. She was a pretty thing, propped up against the sleek counter, lips quirked high enough to contradict her sultry eyes. 

"Uh," I fumbled slightly before I simply shrugged, "Whatever you're having is fine."

Matty smiled, teeth glinting with the extremity of it, then leant in closer to order, close enough to the barmaid that I struggled to hear their exchange.

The woman flashed him a flirty smile before she finally slipped away, leaving me alone with the likes of Matty once again. I couldn’t for the life of me decide on how I felt about that.

"You been out long then?" I asked as a way of conversation, eyes flitting around the rest of the room, my voice raised just enough to be heard over the music.

"Depends on who you're asking."

My forehead pinched at that, and so Matty laughed.

"Jamie doesn't know I'm out."

I gave a slow nod. "Right. But won't he find out though? You know, come morning, when your mug's plastered all over Twitter and The Times."

Matty’s smile soured ever so slightly at that but he still chirped right back, pressing further into my space, arm brushing mine. “That’s the fun of it, Squeaks. Gotta live a little, yeah?”

The barmaid came wading back over before I could over-analyse his response, settling down an expensive bottle of Belvedere alongside two glasses. "Hope you enjoy it."

Matty dipped his chin at her, one side of his mouth tugging its way up before he hip-checked me into motion.

"Come on then, lead the way!"

--

Strobe lights danced in his peripheral vision, blinding and eccentric enough to cast shadows and beams out over the room. The bass of the current song being played overhead resonated deep within his chest, thudding alongside his erratic heartbeat. But Matty couldn't seem to concentrate on any of that, not when the girl swaying beside him stood so close, a breath away.

"DJ tonight is really going for it!" She declared as she tossed her head back carelessly, laughing up at the ceiling. 

Matty couldn’t find it in him to reply, too busy staring. Mouth agape as his eyes raked over the length of her body. The moisture that clung to the line of her throat, the way that the shorter hairs that framed her face curled in the humidity, how her body just moved. As though she didn't even have to try. Like she was just dancing to dance, not caring who was watching.

Briefly, Matty wondered how hot she must have felt wrapped up in that tight leather jacket of hers, but couldn't for the life of him bring himself to ask. Not when she looked so carefree, so buoyant. Plus, the leather only added to the image Matty had honed in on.

She was grinning still, almost madly now, when she turned her head to catch his keen gaze. She leant in close, so close that Matty could breathe in the scent of her all too easily, the same sweet fragrance that surrounded her constantly and had been filling up his head for days since he’d first smelt it.

"Listen to this riff coming up! Just after the bridge." She instructed him, bright eyes hidden behind drooping lids as her lips brushed against the shell of Matty’s ear. 

He forced back a shiver at the feeling and tried his very hardest to follow the order, straining to focus on the song instead of the girl’s proximity.

She continued to bop her head languidly and her eyes finally fell completely shut just as a guitar sounded. The chords of it flowed so fluently, edging closer and closer towards a finale. 

She looked so serene whilst she listened, so carefree. As though the only language she'd ever been able to truly understand was the sound of music.

They fell into rhythm without even thinking, the two of them, he dropped his head against her neck so that his hips could sway with hers, a drink loosely gripped between the pads of his fingers. And she seemingly allowed it, even as they stood in a crowd so full of onlooking people. 

It was strange though. All of his thoughts were centred around her, the way she moved, the rise and fall of her chest. The three freckles perched on the bone of her collar. But just as that realisation settled in and they continued to dance, Matty felt the sudden sensation of air forcing its way back into his lungs. The action was so apparently clear that he realised, momentarily, that he'd forgotten just how imperative it was to simply breathe. 

He wasn't sure whether it was down to the alcohol, or something other, but he revelled in the sharp chill of it, the rushing of his blood. The way it made him dizzy with adrenaline. It was akin to something he hadn’t felt in a long while.

--

"Mouse."

I hummed noncommittally in response, not paying the voice behind me much mind as I approached the bar again. Matty wanted something fizzy this time around and I didn’t mind sharing.

"Mouse!" It came again, louder.

The crowd seemed to have tripled in the short time it had taken me to weave my way off of the dance floor, it was buzzing now, hands and faces and drinks everywhere. My gaze flickered back over my shoulder momentarily to see if I could still make Matty out in the heaving mass, just so that I could reassure him that I'd soon be back, that I was already at the bar.

"Mouse!" There it was again, that voice, only this time it was accompanied by a grabbing hand. 

I startled at the sensation and whipped around, frowning when I saw it was Ronan standing there, my confused gaze now peering up into his storming blue. I shrugged the hand off, then rubbed at the wrist it had seized.

"That'll leave a bruise." I mumbled with a pinched expression.

Ronan's lips only thinned as he stared down at me, not saying a word. 

I huffed unhappily, "What did you want, Ro?"

Ronan’s sharp scoff cut through the noise, sounding as though I should have already known the answer to that one. "You're bladdered." He practically spat.

"Thanks for the insight, Sherlock." I countered with a mocking salute, and went to turn away again but there was that hand.

"Jesus, Ronan! Can't I just enjoy a night out? Thought you'd be the first person to egg me on!" I found myself exclaiming, only growing annoyed by the unnecessary exchange, by his rough touch.

I saw his jaw tick, the muscles work beneath the grit of his teeth, and instinctively took a deep breath.

With an exaggerated sniff, Ronan cut his eyes at me again, and even in my drunken haze, I knew that I’d made a mistake somewhere.

"Look, I'm sorry." I tried to backpedal, pulse quickening, "I'm just a little tipsy. Didn't mean to go off on you like that."

"Save it." Ronan grunted out, his hand grabbing at my arm once again, this time it was a lot harsher, heavier. So much so that I couldn't hide my wince, nor the sharp inhale. "We're leavin'."

My tongue fell slack as I attempted to swallow the weighty feeling in my throat, sobering up quickly just as Ronan began to tug me through the hordes of bustling clubbers.

It had been a long while since I had first walked away from the redhead. A drunken one night stand which had progressed into a recurring bad habit during my last year at uni, when I'd still been struggling to wrap my head around everything. Fighting back and forth with the idea of being with somebody, of allowing them to see me completely. Of learning how to trust.

In truth, I’d been at my lowest, and the first few times Ronan and I had slept together, I wasn't so sure that I'd been able to walk, much less jump into bed with someone I considered a mate, when I woke up the next morning. 

But I had brushed it aside, figuring that my inebriated mind had only gone after what my sober self had tried its best not to want.

I couldn't really recall the many people I'd got with during that odd period of time, I honestly hadn't wanted to remember much. But Ronan had been mixed in with a throng of others- bartenders, waiters, boys from my classes. And somewhere amongst them all, there had also been Teddy's dad. But the redhead had been a constant. Somewhat of a regular seeing as though I’d had a tiny crush on him way back when.

Then Teddy had obviously come along and I’d been forced to face the facts.

Ronan, as grand as he could often be, was jealous as the best of times, and sadistic at the worst. He didn't much like to share and the man tended to swing towards the belief that the people he had in and out of his bed were his to keep. 

And I wasn't demented enough to think that I'd deserved the treatment, but no one else had noticed back then, no one else could have understood. Then with the arrival of Teddy, Ronan hadn't been much interested in the likes of me anymore. And although I'd been adamant that we’d remain friends, I really hadn't seen much of anyone after leaving uni. And I’d been more than content with that fact for a long while now.

In a panicked breath, I fought for my mind to catch up with the rest of me just as I tore my arm from Ronan’s overbearing grip, causing me to stumble backwards into a large group gathered around a tall table. 

"What the fuck are you doing?" 

Came Ronan's heated voice, it was all that I could really focus on as I struggled to continue backwards, desperate to get away but not wanting to cause a scene. I whispered apologies under my breath without even thinking, tripping over my own feet in my haste.

"Mouse!"

The redhead was hot on my tail though, calling out to me again and again as he forced his way through the overlapping crowd that bustled between us. 

I continued with my sorry’s, murmuring to the people around me as I started to shove and push.

But I had been so focused on the voice coming towards me that I’d all but jumped right out of my skin when I heard my name echo in my ear. A quick flash and hands were settling themselves on my shoulders to still me. 

Impulsively, I jolted away, springing around to meet Alice's wide eyes.

"Hey, are you okay?"

"Alice. Alice, where's-" I struggled to get enough oxygen into my lungs as I fumbled for words, any words. The blinding fear and panic I should've been feeling only moments ago convulsed through me now like a tornado ripping effortlessly through a city.

"Mouse!" 

Was that Ronan again? 

My head throbbed with the thought, desperate now.

"Please, Alice."

I could feel the shortness of my breaths as they came out in huffs, my startled eyes flickering every which way as I searched for a way out. An escape.

"Mouse, what's happened? Mouse?" And oh, did I wish that she'd stop saying my name. I wrapped my arms around myself, trying to catch a sight of familiar red.

Alice was hesitant to get any closer now after how I'd so violently flinched, but even through the foggy panic I felt I could see her evident worry.

"Mouse! Alice!"

I watched as Alice's troubled gaze trailed somewhere over my left shoulder, to a space just behind me, and I couldn't help the aggressive way I started to shake my head. Hoping she’d somehow understand. I was overreacting sure, but trembling so hard it almost hurt. It should’ve hurt, I thought.

"Matty." Was the first word that spewed out of my mouth, and I started repeating it like a prayer as I felt the walls of the bar begin to close in. And so, a more than concerned Alice nodded hurriedly at me before she cautiously draped an arm around my waist and started to lead me away.

I was almost certain that Ronan was still calling out, but I couldn't quite hear his voice anymore over the pounding in my ears and so I tried to focus on where we were going. I thought Alice was talking, too. But her voice was so gentle that I struggled to read her lips. 

People were flashing by and I noticed a familiar face pass us by then, but they looked far too alarmed and hurried on without a greeting smile, their arms stretched outwards to catch something behind us.

Alice stumbled on, only sparing a single glance backwards as she veered me out from the overwhelming crowd.

I could honestly think a little clearer now, eyes shuttered, flickering back and forth between everyone and everything. Though it all still felt too much.

"Just up here, okay, lovie?" Alice murmured, her presence soothing, safe.

I licked at my lower lip and dipped my head in acknowledgment. "Sorry." I replied breathlessly, voice faint.

Alice blinked at me owlishly and then frowned, before she then squeezed me closer to her side. "Had me worried there, babe, but you don't have to apologise. No need, alright?"

Before I could even think up a response, Alice was speaking again- only, not to me. I dragged my head back up upon hearing a familiar lilt and was bombarded with the sight of a staggered looking Matty. The bright smile he'd been wearing upon our arrival had been wiped away the second he’d gotten one good look at my face. 

"What the hell happened to you?"

The question made me think and my forehead furrowed at the sound of the unknown voice. I peered around slightly to find another man seated right beside Matty, he was of a similar build and with hair just as dark. Matty, who had jumped up to meet Alice and I as we drew closer to the booth, reached out for me.

The expression he wore confused me to no end but I couldn't question it, not when Alice was already handing me over to him, albeit with a bit of hesitancy.

"Is she okay?" Matty asked her briskly, his eyes never once leaving mine. I’d never seen them go so wide.

"She honestly came out of nowhere, practically on the verge of a panic attack and looking as though she'd just seen a ghost." Alice explained wearily, whilst Matty ushered me into the nearest seat. His seat.

He jerked his head at the man sitting opposite as he slid in after me, "Go get us some water, will you!"

The man, put on the spot, looked both alarmed and perplexed at the sudden order, but nodded at Matty all the same before he ducked quickly out of the booth.

"Who-" But my inquiry was cut off.

"Danny, mate of mine. Ignore him." Matty answered, somehow already knowing my question, as a careful hand came up to cup my chin, it guided my face closer so that I could get a better look at him. As gentle as Matty was whilst handling me though, I could see the venomous anger in his eyes, the emotions that warred there. "Who was it?"

I blinked slowly but didn’t look away. "What d’you mean?"

He inhaled slowly, so calm it would’ve been intriguing any other time. "It's obvious that something happened, Squeaks. So who was it?"

Squeaks. Squeaks. Squeaks.

I focused on the way my name curled around Matty’s soft spoken tongue.

"Babe." Matty tried to regain my attention and I felt a soft hand tap my shoulder before it dropped itself. "I can't make you tell me what happened but I want to know who to avoid when I try to get you out of here. You hearin’ me?"

I gaped slightly before hurrying to shake my head in return.

"No, no, it's fine, Matty. Honestly. I didn't, I didn’t mean to scare everyone. I'll be fine. I’m okay."

He levelled me with a look, and for some reason it made me feel as though we were the only two people in the room.

"Please don't lie to me. Not right now." 

Was what Matty came out with, his voice so steady that I truly did wonder whether he'd actually had a drop of alcohol tonight.

"I was raised by liars, can't stand lies." He added and I swallowed thickly.

Matty just sighed.

"Look, I can probably get us out the back door, alright? I'll get Danny to deal with anyone else." He told me, but only continued to ramble on as he pulled his mobile out from his front pocket, and then he was rambling down the phone to somebody else. 

I watched him all the while, still a little dazed from the blinding panic I’d just felt and the idea of Ronan still not being too far. My eyes wouldn’t leave Matty though, even with those thoughts, even though my body craved to search him out, to see if he was near. Head screaming with the intensity of it.

Matty gave me a tiny smile when he hung up and his hand came to rest over my forearm, a vast contradiction to the harsh grip I’d felt there earlier.

"I've got a car waiting outside, you okay with me dropping you home?"

My mum had always claimed I’d been far too proud, hated having other people take care of me, hated them doing the things I could easily do myself. But at that moment all I wanted was my bed. Was to be home. 

And so, taking a big leap, I jerked my head in a quick nod, if anyone could even call it that, and it felt like Matty understood just how much power I was giving up then when the man slid out of the booth and offered up a hand.

Still, I took it.

[jjkamochoso]

The Perfect Fit

Story Overview: Levi Ackerman begrudgingly finds himself falling in love with the Survey Corps’ seamstress. Will they be able to own up to their feelings for each other? Or is their love doomed to fail before they discover the truths of each other’s hearts? This slow burn reader insert story will be filled with angst, yearning, and a bit of mystery as we slowly unravel the truths behind Y/N’s past… and explore her and Levi’s future!

Chapter 9

Series Masterlist

Chapter 8 linked here

Chapter 10 linked here

Levi Ackerman x female reader

Warnings: cussing, blood mention (nothing overly graphic)

When you entered Levi's room to get him clean clothes, you took the time to be by yourself for a moment, trying to collect your racing thoughts. Everything had happened so quickly-- you went from being sound asleep to stitching up Levi's flesh. Not that his injuries were life threatening or something he had never dealt with before, but it still shook you when you remembered that even someone as strong as him isn't invincible. You took in a trembling breath, moving to rest your face in your hands for a second but you stopped before they made contact. You hadn't noticed until now that your hands were covered in Levi's blood. You groaned. Of course they were, he was bleeding like a damn geyser. You didn't want to soil his fresh laundry with your stained skin so you ran to the nearest water basin to begin your cleanup. With your now clean fingers, you began to warm up a big bucketful of water to use to wash off Levi since you knew he hated being dirty but was too injured to do it himself. While the water was heating up over the fire, you ran back to his room to grab some towels and his clothes. When you dropped them off in your room, Levi gave you a quizzical look.

"Why are you running around like this so late? I'm going to my own room so you can get some sleep." He sat up with his feet dangling over the edge of the bed, threatening to get up again and it took everything in you not to shove him back down like you had done minutes prior when the doctor was in there.

"Levi," you sighed, "please relax. I'm warming up some water so I can at least clean off the grime you're covered in. Then I'll help you into your room."

"Tch. You don't think I can clean myself?" As he stood from the bed, he winced and grabbed the side with his injured ribs. You stood there, eyebrows raised as he failed to prove to you he could act independently at the moment.

"By all means, Captain. Go fetch the bucket without gritting your teeth and swearing. If you can do that, I'll believe you don't need help."

If looks could kill, you would've been dead a hundred times over from the glare Levi gave you as he sat once more. "Brat."

You let out a triumphant "humph!" and left to collect the bucket, now heated up. When you came back, you swore you heard Levi release a sigh of relief, and you figured it was because he was ready to lose his mind if he had to sit there covered in blood for any longer. You took up your usual spot next to him on the bed and dunked the first cloth in the water, bringing it to his wounded arm. He moved lightning fast, grabbing the cloth from your grip.

"I can do it myself," he grumbled, eyes fixed on an empty spot of the room, "I'm not an invalid."

You chose your next words carefully as your hand hovered over his own, fearful of scaring him away with your touch. "Levi. You're not an invalid and you're not a burden. You're injured and I want to help you in any way I can. Not because you're not capable, but because I want to make your life a little bit easier in the ways I know how." You drew in a sharp breath as your voice went small. "Please. Let me help you."

For once in his life, Levi wasn't sure what to do. He couldn't stand the thought of you seeing him in such a state of weakness, fearing you would think of him differently than the strong soldier he was supposed to be, but here you were, instead fighting to come to his aid. He knew you were compassionate and caring so it was probably just in your nature to help people you deemed in need of it. Deep in his heart he hoped it was also because you recognized the connection you two shared, whatever it could be categorized as. He relinquished the cloth to your open and waiting palm, laughing internally at the surprised look that came onto your face when you realized he had complied with your pleads. You gently took his arm in your hands and began to cleanse the area around his stitches, not wanting to irritate the skin further.

"Is it alright if I clean the other arm for you? I don't want you to pop the stitches if you do it yourself, but I don't want to make you uncomfortable, either." He had an unreadable look on his face but his eyes held a softness that you were now becoming accustomed to and was a look that you secretly hoped was reserved just for you.

"That's fine," he said, his voice firm but not unkind. You nodded and worked on his other arm, down to his hands, up to where his shoulder met his neck. He was starting to feel less tense as the warm water and your benevolent touch melted away the stresses of the expedition. When you got the go ahead to wash his back, Levi's eyes fluttered closed at the first graze of the cloth. He had never received attention like this. He had never thought he even wanted, desired, craved, something like this before he met you. You were always going out of your way to help him, but it wasn't out of pity. It was like you enjoyed doing things for him in the same way he did for you too. Little did he know, you were thinking of the same sort of thoughts as you wiped away the accumulated sweat from his scar littered back. You didn't know much about his life before the Scouts, no one except Erwin and Hange did, but judging by how faded some of the scars were, he got them decades ago and you concluded he had a rough upbringing. Not that you were surprised, no one is as guarded as he is for no reason. You were just glad he accepted your help and allowed you to see him in such a vulnerable state. You figured you had to mean something to Levi to see him like this, let alone lay your hands on him.

"Okay, back is done. Chest next?"

He nodded as he faced you again. You readied the washcloth with more warm water, trying to balance being gentle with him while being speedy enough to not douse him in cold water if it sat too long. You were extremely gentle, taking great care not to touch his ribs more than necessary. You had gotten over your timidity of seeing him shirtless, knowing that professionalism took priority when you looked at him in this state.

"Done. Legs are next, do you need help taking off your pants?"

Both of you were too exhausted to be embarrassed by the connotations of that sentence. Levi was able to do most of it but you swooped in to finish the job of releasing the pant legs from his ankles so he didn't have to bend over. Thankfully his legs weren't too dirty so it was quick work. You turned around as he changed into fresh underwear and you helped him shimmy into the rarely worn pajamas you found deep in his dresser drawer. You collected his dirty clothes into a pile to clean later and when you went to assist Levi into his own bed, you slapped your hand to your head.

"I totally forgot to wash your face. All that hard work and I forgot to polish up the money maker."

You wore a teasing grin while Levi rolled his eyes, a faint smile on his lips. He found it so attractive that you took great care in your work, no matter what you did. He was about to stop you from raising the wash cloth to his face and suggest he could do it himself, but he decided he wanted to be selfish for once and relish in your loving contact for the limited time he had access to it. You gently dabbed the cloth onto his cheek, careful to not pull at the skin. You felt your heart rate skyrocket as you became acutely aware of just how close his lips were to yours. You felt his steady breath land on your arm as you brought the cloth to his forehead, pushing his hair out of the way, and then to his other cheek. You were getting lost in his blue gray eyes that never left your own. He was staring you down, not in a way that was threatening, but more like he was studying you. You were studying him too, as you had before in other quick glances, but this time felt different. Neither of you were afraid of the other catching you in the act of shameless staring. You both were unabashedly looking at one another, no ounce of shame or uncomfortable energy present. It was strangely familiar the way you observed each other, like you had done this every day of your lives. Come to think of it, ever since you moved to the castle, you and Levi had looked at each other a lot. Your eyes always found solace in his reassuring gaze, no matter the occasion. After a joke of yours that had the dining hall in wheezing laughter, after a sarcastic comment of his that had you fighting for your life so as to not get reprimanded by the higher ups for giggling. Bad news, good news, worse news. Any time anything happened, there was no doubt that you two would lock eyes and share silent understanding. Even now, as you tried your best to clean him up, there was no need for words. You were sharing unspoken thank you's; him to you for taking care of him, you to him for letting you do so. The air seemed to get heavier around you as you inadvertently leaned in toward him the slightest amount. Levi sensed the almost imperceptible movement but he didn't flinch away, even though his body was begging him to break away from your closeness. It was decades of dealing with shitty people in shitty situations that taught him not to trust anybody and that there's more than likely an ulterior motive behind any action someone takes toward him. Still, he found himself no further away from you as his mind reeled, telling him to run away from whatever was happening before you could hurt him.

That was the thing--he wasn't afraid of you hurting him. He had known you a little over half a year but you had proven yourself to be just as valuable to him as his closest companions and shared all of their greatest traits: you were caring like Hange, passionate like Erwin, as headstrong as Isabelle, as focused as Furlan. You were an amalgamation of every person he had ever cared about. They had never done him wrong and he'd be damned if he thought you were any different. The one thing that set you apart from those people, though, was the nature of his bond with you. You had gone from strangers to close friends in no time, which was fine with him, but his attraction to you had been confusing him nonstop since that day he ripped his cape for you. Levi was a total stranger when it came to romance. Having no good role models to show him what romantic love could be like, he grew to fear it. It was just a distraction, a pesky thing like a fly, that could only lead to heartbreak. In a world where death loomed around every corner, Levi felt he couldn't afford to lose any more people. If romantic love was as life altering as people claim it to be, losing a significant other would be world shattering. He put his life on the line many more times than the average person--what kind of boyfriend or husband would he be to subject his girlfriend or wife to the pain of losing her mate? What kind of man would he become if he himself felt the loss of yet another person he would go to the ends of the earth for? As all these thoughts flooded his mind, he still couldn't find it within himself to create a gap between you two. His heart was pounding in his chest and his blood felt like it was on fire as he took the cloth that was still resting on his face from your hand, enjoying the feeling of your skin on his own. He found an unsoiled spot of the same cloth and brought it up to your face, causing you to jump a little at the unexpected contact.

"You got my blood on your face," he said, still not breaking eye contact as he wiped your cheek with a tender brush of the fabric. You smiled airily as you savored this side of Levi rarely seen by anyone. You were sure that in any other lifetime you and Levi would've kissed by now, seeing as you were in such an intimate position, but this universe was far too cruel to allow you to indulge in affection like that. Still, you didn't let that stop you from relishing in the fact that you were here, with Levi, and he seemed to be enjoying himself as much as you were. You knew he would've pulled away in an instant if he didn't want to be so close so you took it as a win. However, you didn't want him to get too overwhelmed from your lovelorn staring so you cast your eyes and chin a bit downward. Levi immediately got your attention again by bringing his free hand to your chin and lifting it delicately so he could see your eyes again. You felt nauseous, but in the best way possible. Did he really just do that? Your heart felt like it was battering against the walls of your chest as Levi kept his eyes trained on you once more. It was like he was trying to use his irises to communicate to you everything he wouldn't dare say out loud. Luckily for him, you understood him perfectly. In a show of your dedication to him, you tilted your forehead forward and he easily comprehended what you were doing, meeting his own forehead to rest on yours. Your noses grazed each other and you had never felt a sense of peace wash over you like it did in that moment.

"I care deeply for you, too," you answered him, voice barely above a whisper. His eyes shined brighter than you had ever seen before and he was ecstatic you accepted the message he found too excruciating to speak. A barely there quirk of the lips was present on Levi, the man beyond relieved that he wasn't the only player in this game of love. You knew it was extremely late and you wanted Levi to rest before the sun came up so you reluctantly pulled away from him.

"Sleep here. I got some rest before you came back so I don't need the bed for tonight. If you need anything, don't hesitate to ask." Levi went to protest but you shot him the most serious look you could muster. That was enough to quiet him down as he sunk into the bed, exhaustion creeping over him as he finally succumbed to sleep. You truly weren't tired so you kept your hands busy, scrubbing the blood from his clothes and sewing up his ripped shirt. Before you knew it, the sun started shining into your window and you hurriedly pulled the curtains closed so Levi wouldn't wake up. You were still in a bit of shock that he practically confessed his feelings for you, but you were more so pleased that you weren't misconstruing his actions the past few months. You knew nothing would really change in your relationship after this revelation, and you took comfort in that. You guys would be doing the same things you had already been doing, but with the truth of the intent behind the actions known. There were no expectations or societal pressures you had to bow down to, it would just be two people enjoying each others' presence and knowing you had each other's backs, no matter what. You definitely wouldn't be opposed to it if Levi suggested he wanted to try more romantic things one day, but you were a patient person. You'd wait a thousand lifetimes to kiss him if it meant he was by your side, just existing. Even if he never found himself comfortable enough to try something like that, you wouldn't fault him. His unyielding gaze was more than enough reassurance for you. You were brought out of your thoughts by your growling stomach. It must be time for breakfast! You went down to the dining hall and grabbed your food to go. It was pretty empty, which you figured considering most of the Corps just came back a few hours ago. You took a few pieces of fruit and some bread for Levi as well, carrying all of it up in a napkin. You'd make him some fresh tea when he woke. You quietly slid out a chair at the table to eat so you didn't make a mess and stress Levi out with your crumbs everywhere. As you ate, your eyes wandered along the room but they, of course, landed on the black haired man in your bed. His chest rose and lowered with the deep breathing of sleep and his lips were slightly parted. In all honesty he looked pretty beat up and you hoped his recovery would go smoothly. He hated being out of commission and you were eager to take him on your charity trip to the interior. You peeked out of the curtains and saw the sun was now high in the sky, signaling early afternoon. You wrote up a small note to hang on your door to tell people to drop off their torn clothes in a quiet manner outside the door and you'd get started on them in order of first come, first served. With a full tummy and in a dark, warm room, you felt yourself starting to get sleepy. You tried to blink away the tiredness but it was no use as you were yawning nonstop. You hadn't heard any footsteps outside your door meaning work hadn't been dropped off for you yet. You figured a little nap wouldn't hurt so you tried resting your head on the table but you were supremely uncomfortable. Levi had your only pillow and you frowned at your lack of thinking things through. You didn't want the creaking of the door to wake him or else you would've gone to his room for an extra pillow. You figured he wouldn't care if you shared the bed, right? You'd just lay your head near his feet and it'd be like you weren't even there. You stealthily placed the chair at the foot of the bed and laid your head on your outstretched arms. It must've been even comfier than you expected because you fell asleep almost instantly.

Levi immediately woke up when he felt the bed dip slightly but when he saw it was you, he calmed down right away. He couldn't resist wearing a soft grin when he noticed you were out like a light once your head hit the plush mattress. Feeling comforted by your company, he was able to fall back asleep as well, this time dreaming of you.

Chapter 10

Taglist: @blueeclipsepaperstudent

[a-very-sparkly-nerd]

love heals when pain's too much to bear

Here's the follow-up to will i wake tomorrow from this nightmare? - Overall pretty fluffy! Also, I'm in the mood to write a lil clauderry, so send me prompts!!

Rayla burrowed in tighter to him, trying to lose herself in him the way it’d always been so easy to do but was proving impossible now. “Just… Just be Callum for me. Please. Just be you.”

He chuckled a little. “I think I can do that. I’m very good at being me.”

“The one and only.”

Callum’s chin rested on top of her head, not minding the sticky tears that dripped onto his lean chest. “Tell me whenever you’re ready. I’ll always listen. Or- or don’t. You don’t have to. Just… you’re not alone, okay? You never will be. You know that, right?”

“I knew you were coming,” Rayla breathed, fisting her hand over his heart and looking up to watch his eyes, to drown in that sea of concern and anger–not at her, she knew–but more than anything else, love. “I knew you were coming. It was-” She cleared her throat, remembering that horrible feeling she’d fooled herself out of afterwards that had filled her stomach while dangled over the side of the Sea Legs, knowing that he’d come for her. That he’d always jump after, no matter what. “It, um… it got me through a lot.”

Tears pooled in his pinkened eyes, and he furiously peppered kisses all over her face– her nose, the tips of her ears, forehead, cheeks, and extra-careful ones over her face markings. “Gods, Rayla. I’m sorry you had to wait at all. I’m sorry I wasn’t here so many times. I’m sorry you were on your own.”

She shook her head furiously, gripping his waistband because that was the only thing she could find purchase on and trying to ignore how heat rose in both their cheeks at his hot little grunt. “No. No, Callum, it’s not your fault. It’s mine. Mine for trying to make myself think I’m already dead when I’m not. But, um… I’m actually pretty alive, it turns out”–they choked out identical laughs–“and I kinda like it this way. So, um… I’m alive. I’m alive with you, Callum, and that makes it worth it. Sorry if that doesn’t make sense.”

He cupped her thighs instead of her back, snorting a little. “When do we ever make sense?”

Rayla leaned up for a soft kiss he pressed into, warm and firm and inseparable with him holding her tight. He’d never let her go, never do wrong by her. She couldn’t find it in herself to have ethical problems with it at the moment, just wanted… him. Everything he’d give her.

“Ray?” he asked, pulling back to thumb at her cheeks, and Rayla realized she was crying some more.

“I’m okay,” she assured him. Just terrified of losing him because she’d been all too mortally reminded of their fragility, just like when she’d been fifteen and drenched like this and made the worst mistake of her life. “I’m okay.”

“I’ve got you,” Callum assured her. “I’m right here, always will be. I’m here.” Said for himself as much as her.

And just like on that other godsdamned boat–Sources, she really hated boats–Rayla was wiping away tears and struggling to hold herself together. But unlike then, she could tell him she loved him now and hold him–his gaze and his hand and his heart and whatever else he offered–and let them be whatever they wanted to be. Whatever they could be.

Whatever they could be felt like the most beautiful thing in the universe.

Read more on ao3

[tragicclownwrites]

Why the ending of "Sponge-Cano!" was great SquidBob fodder

Hello! I'm back with an analysis post as I came across something recently and wanted to share some thoughts.

I'm likely late to the game here, but I saw an old post in which the author (a fellow SquidBobber) was upset by the ending of "Sponge-Cano!" and I just have to say... huh!?

Were we watching the same episode? 🤨

Needless to say, I was thoroughly perplexed by this reaction because I personally read into it much differently. Then again, I am a clown.

Therefore - in the spirit of friendly fandom discourse - I wanted to provide another perspective on this episode. Absolutely no shade to the OP either - people are allowed to have differing opinions, after all.

If you're with me, let's clown around below the cut!

The lie that started it all

Before we dive in any further, let's take a look at the scene that started this whole conversation.

Essentially, after Squidward's heartfelt confession to SpongeBob, while he's hanging on for dear life over a boiling volcano...

Squidward: "Please SpongeBob, I didn't mean any of that! I do appreciate your friendship. I am grateful. I'm… I'm… I'm grateful for the life I'm living! Who knows how long I'll have it? I learned that from you, remember?"

He says this after being rescued by his true love SpongeBob:

Squidward: "You know SpongeBob, in light of everything that just happened... I lied to you. I am not grateful for anything! I mean look at me. I don't even have a roof to sleep under, anymore!"

Now, this is the moment that had the OP so heated about this episode. After everything he said, after SpongeBob saved his life, he just... lied?

Weeeell, not exactly.

The truth always reveals itself

Now, for my hot take... I don't think Squidward was lying at all when he said he was grateful for SpongeBob.

Before you immediately decide that I've completely out-clowned myself this time, just hear me out!

There are a few reasons Squidward may have reacted the way he did in the aftermath of the volcano debacle.

He's Squidward

Our man's just lost his whole fucking house for the billionth time

The reality of what he just said is slowly catching up with him

He's Squidward

Unlike his more chipper counterpart, the guy doesn't exactly wear his heart on his sleeve and has been shown to struggle with vulnerability and admitting failure. I mean, he can barely manage to apologize for his less savory actions without choking and sputtering like a fool!

However, when his life was on the line in this scene, he was vulnerable in more ways than one. Physically, he was quite literally dangling over an active volcano - you can't get more vulnerable than that! Emotionally, he bore his soul to SpongeBob because he thought he was going to die and wouldn't have another chance to say any of that again. Keep in mind, he truly believed he wouldn't live to see SpongeBob ever again.

I've mentioned this in my Reigisa x SquidBob masterpost, but there have been several other instances where - particularly, in a dire situation - Squidward will openly admit that he has always liked/cared for SpongeBob. And similarly, he's also tried to take it back or act like he didn't mean it when everything turns out okay or if other people aside from SpongeBob hear his confession.

So, as much as he "hates" SpongeBob and can't stand him, when it really counts, the truth always reveals itself.

Is it possible that he was just trying to play at SpongeBob's heartstrings to save his own ass? Perhaps.

But then, he accepts his fate. He loses his grip, giving everyone a tearful farewell. That is, until his little yellow angel comes to his rescue.

SpongeBob: "Squidward, I always knew you felt that way. Aw, buddy. Thanks for finally opening up to us."

⬆️Just look at the pure love in his eyes! (*Patrick voice*: LOOK AT IT!) The sappy sponge was even prepared to sacrifice himself for him. 🥺

While there was absolutely no way SpongeBob would actually let Squidward perish - promises be damned - it wasn't until Squidward poured his heart out, putting his true feelings towards SpongeBob out in the open, that he was saved from certain death.

You know how they say, "the truth will set you free"? No kidding!

As for why SpongeBob was completely fine with Squidward's lie after the fact (another point of contention for OP), well... he loves him. Period. And I think, despite his emotional constipation and frequent annoyance with the sponge in question, it's pretty clear Squidward loves him, too.

Therefore, SpongeBob wasn't upset by Squidward's outburst here because, as naïve as he may be, I don't think that fact is lost on him either.

In conclusion...

I think it's safe to say that "Sponge-Cano!" was a pretty great episode to add to the ever-growing SquidBob pile.

And if you thought the scene I talked about above was the last of it, ohohoho~ 🤭😏

You. Just. Wait.

At the very end of the episode, after Squidward loses his home and complains that he no longer has "a roof to sleep under anymore," SpongeBob does what SpongeBob does best: he offers to help him out.

Even after Squidward's selfish actions in "Can You Spare a Dime?" (which had some great fodder as well, such as *ahem* Squidward making SpongeBob wear a sexy maid outfit), SpongeBob still lets him stay at his house for an indefinite amount of time. Continuity? I don't know her.

To which, this gets even better.

Squidward doesn't refuse and find somewhere else to crash. After all, wasn't SpongeBob the reason he was miserable enough to be sacrificed in the first place? Why would he subject himself to even more SpongeBob, if that were the case?

At SpongeBob's house, he doesn't sleep on the couch or in a spare room. He doesn't even take SpongeBob's bed for himself while SpongeBob sleeps elsewhere - just like he did in "Can You Spare a Dime?"

NO.

The two of them share SpongeBob's bed. As in, they sleep in the same bed together.

Are these two fucking serious!?

They totally cuddled. Maybe even kissed.

All that to say, as much as Squidward whines and gripes about how much SpongeBob makes him miserable, it's clear to see that - even in the face of life-threatening adversity - SpongeBob's presence in his life is the key to his happiness. In this case, the key to his survival as well.

Now, if only our favorite grumpy octopus would take that spongey key, embracing him fully, to unlock that door... 🌈

[mx-lamour]

I noticed a new detail in I, Strahd that has me screaming.

So I'm doing a critical writing essay on the way that P. N. Elrod uses the first-person perspective in I, Strahd to enhance the narrative, with Strahd himself as, you know, the unreliable narrator of his own life (which just... mmm! It's so good).

And I'm just going back through the book to look for the page number where he says, "That's what I told myself, anyway."

But, I then found this instead:

You would spill my blood, armsman?

HOLD. THE F**K. ON.

armsman???

So I rifle back through the pages, because that is not what he said. That's not the quote. It's Commander. It's "You would spill my blood, Commander?"

And I find it. And I'm right.

OOGH.

Oh, does it hurt.

Strahd is removing himself from Alek in this moment. He's taking him down already in his mind. Trying to make Alek less important, so that it's less of a blow to himself when he kills him, just a moment later.

Commander is a title, and one of respect. It shows that Alek occupies an important position. And even that, I realize now, was a point of distance, because the two of them often do call each other by their given names. When Strahd was in danger of assassination, Alek yelled "Strahd!" multiple times, which is very personal. When they were out on tour, dealing with the local burgomasters, Alek got perhaps a little too excited and Strahd chided him by just quietly saying his name, "Alek."

When he called Alek "Commander", Strahd was hanging over the edge of a cliff to grab his hand, almost ready to die himself if Alek fell. Alek was in danger of death. In that moment, Strahd chose to focus on the fact that he might lose a leader in his ranks, rather than a close personal friend. It was a little bit of distance, so that he could focus on the task in front of him. To keep his head in that unexpected crisis.

When Strahd calls him "armsman", though... Alek is now faceless. He has been stripped of name. He has been stripped of rank. He has been stripped of all personal attachment. Because that is what Strahd needed to do in order to complete the task ahead of him.

Alek has also just stabbed him in the chest, when Strahd inaccurately recalls that moment, and they are both in shock. Given a chance, Alek would never have done this. "Only a drop or two," he had answered, dangling from the cliff, "if it spares the rest, my lord." (Alek follows his lead in this act of distancing. "Didn't have to, my lord," he murmurs this time.) It can't be Alek, so this is just another soldier. This is just another fight. It's just another war.

So, Strahd thinks of him as "armsman" here, to avoid a truly devastating layer of grief.

Neither of us had a choice. That's what I told myself anyway.

The quote I was looking for is on page 137. One page before all that.

[xxknockoutxx]

*My first writing? Story? Idfk*

"𝐘𝐨𝐮'𝐯𝐞 𝐠𝐨𝐭 𝐭𝐨 𝐛𝐞 𝐟𝐮𝐜𝐤𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐤𝐢𝐝𝐝𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐦𝐞"

◈ Context: you're trying to convince miles to let you join him on his Prowler business.

"No, really! i'm so serious" you said with a serious face.

"I'm not buying it. You can't be serious, Ma" You already knew that Miles was dismissive but not this bad. He didn't even look at you. Making you feel all but tinier.

"Do you even know what you just asked me?" He gave you a look that seemed judgmental but genuinely curious at the same time. Still clearly and disbelief that you propose such a thing.

"All I asked, was that I can help you be the Prowler N' shit. You know I'm smart and I scored the highest on every fitness test so you know I'm athletic and come on it's just a huge waste of poten-"

"Ma, this ain't a fucking game!" He looked genuinely annoyed. "This Prowler shit goes way beyond what you're assuming. It's dangerous not only is it dangerous but it's something private. I never should've told you about it in the first place I don't need a sidekick cuz I work alone. Plus how would I be able to live with myself 'f sumthin' bad happened to you. Shit stays on my mind 24/7"

Picking his gaze up from the ground he looks at the buildings in the distance. Having an amazing view of the city from the building where you guys sat. With a sigh, he redirects his attention to you. "Look, I really care about you. More than anything else in this fucking world. And I'm not gonna risk losing everything so you can fuck around. Y'r too important for that..."

Silence filled the atmosphere besides the quiet wind that blows through your hair. "Miles... I'm aware of the dangers of being the Prowler or having any type of association with him. But I care about you more than anything. Plus, y'know I'm too crazy to give a fuck about safety."

You scooted closer to miles with a crazy smile plastered on your face. He still looked indifferent and kept his gaze at the cars riding under his dangling feet. "C'monnnnn Miles!" He didn't change the look on his face or his gaze.

"I'll think about it..."

[ohthewh0rror]

GALE DEKARIOS PLAYLIST

A/N: I usually don’t make playlist for my favorite characters, even short ones like this, but I couldn’t help it. So pls enjoy this playlist for our favorite wizard!

Vindicated - Dashboard Confessional

“Hope dangles on a string / like slow-spinning redemption winding in, and winding out / the shine of it has caught my eye / and roped me in so mesmerizing / so hypnotizing / I am captivated / I am vindicated, I am selfish, I am wrong / I am right, I swear I'm right / swear I knew it all along / and I am flawed / but I am cleaning up so well—”

Notes in Constellations - Chiodos

“I see her smile, in her sleep / I know that she's a dreamer / oh, I'll follow every move she makes / it's been a long, long night / say you're mine, say you're mine / can I keep you tonight? / and we dance around, just like constellations / you keep my body warm / and we dance around, just like constellations / you’re keeping me awake at night/ you make my body warm—”

Dalily — Movements

“And I think it's time you had a pink cloud summer / 'cause you've gone too long without a smile / I think it's time you found another reason to stay for a while / you should stay for a while / I sit and watch now with new eyes, for the green side / lose myself, sink into your sunlight / breath in the breeze like a sweet sigh / keep me tongue-tied / if this lasts forever, I'll be just fine / oh, I'll be just fine—”

Look At The Time - Sawyer Hill

“'Cause when you say that I'm the only one / did you mean that I'm the closest one around? / you know that talk is cheap and don't mean a thing / did you say you loved me 'cause you liked the way it sounds? / the past it hurts / but the future ain't got nothing to do with you / your loving words are for the weak at heart or the simple-minded fools—”

Ornament - Nothing,Nowhere

“In time I'll be hanging on your nightstand by myself / as I sit in the dust while you lay with someone else / and I wish that you could feel how it felt / knowing I am just an ornament on your shelf—”

[gothfoxgirlboy]

A Taste of Defeat

I find myself landing in a brothel. The sounds of sex fill the air. I'm alone in the room but there is a mirror in front of me. My body was transformed into a total shortstack of a goblin. My body feels extremely sensitive and a pile of items lay scattered around me.

Upon grabbing the first one I feel all kinds of information flooding my brain. Spells and knowledge of the items.

I quickly equip the bracelet and the piercing. The smell of sex in the air becomes intoxicating. I need to escape quickly before I lose my mind here. I sneak out the door and mentally I understand that it is an orcish building. While sneaking my way down the stairs to the ground floor I trip, crashing loudly into the large breasts of a horny orc woman.

My skirt flips up and she tries to grab anything she can get her hands on to lift me up. The first thing her fingers find a grip on is the hem of my panties as she pulls up and gives me a terrible wedgie. It digs into my sensitive pussy and crushes my small cock. I moan loudly as my cock twitches and spurts. I use the surging feeling in my body to summon several tentacles that rapidly grab the orc and restrain her. Simultaneously, they grab my panties with no less force than the orc and carry me out of the brothel, where I land face first in the mud as my panties snap.

I run out of the village as fast as I can, flashing dozens of patrons of the red light district, I trip and land ass up a few times. Once out of the village I can sense my fate in the world. My instincts guide me towards my mission. But it doesn’t take long before I start thinking of how many people saw me and how pathetic I must have looked to that orc. 

I feel heat burning me up inside and I can’t help it. I lift up my skirt and my shirt, playing with my large tits and tiny cock. It feels so good to touch myself in this body. I can’t even wrap two fingers around my dick. 

I spend the better part of an hour touching myself everywhere in all kinds of positions, I end up covering my skirt in an obscene amount of cum, not realizing how much goblins produce. Eventually I decide to continue on my adventure after I find the source of the sounds of running water. I find a small river and strip down to wash up before moving along. 

While I clean myself up and turn around to grab my skirt and wash it as well, only to see a white fox grab my skirt and run away with it.

With the little residual mana in my system I craft a piece of jewellery. It’s a necklace that can stop me from cumming. That way I can make sure I’m ready to cast my spells whenever needed. Plus the influence of the succubus shouldn’t affect me.

My shirt barely covers half of my ass and doesn’t really cover anything else.

It was time to quit fooling around though. I was brought here for a mission and I would have to complete it in order to live peacefully. I keep to the edge of the road avoiding any travellers who come by hiding in the woods nearby.

It only takes a few hours to arrive at the succubus’ lair. It seems like a small house from the outside. I know that all I need to do is to drain enough of the sexual energy of the succubus and they’ll be forced to return to hell.

The smell wafting from below the door is enough to tell me I’m in the right place. I take hold of my sword and sneak up to the front entrance. The smell of sex is incredibly strong, there’s something else mixed in too. I feel lightheaded, like I can’t concentrate. I need to touch, but I resist.

I kick open the door, seeing the demoness. She’s fully nude, a massive tentacle cock dangled between her legs. I brandish my sword and charge.

Something happened.

I’m suddenly on the ground held like I’m in a mating press. My shirt tears to shreds.

“I didn’t know dinner would come to me.” The demoness says, as she casually walks up to me and grabs my tits. It feels like I’m pinned down by invisible hands.

She kneels down and grabs my ankles. Placing her cock on me and for the first time I realize how big it is. Even though she’s got her hips against my ass her cock pokes at my lips.

I open my mouth to say something rude but her pheromones smell so strongly that I drool for a moment and she shoves her cock into my mouth.

“Lube that up for me, you don’t want me to go in dry.” The demoness says.

She starts to drool even more than me. Her spit collecting on my body as the she towers above me. It moves and glows as it becomes brightly colored magical seals. I feel my balls swell in size as they begin overproducing semen.

My body explodes in flames of lust as another seal finishes and multiplies my libido exponentially. I drool on the massive cock that seems more than eager to get to the fun part seeing as it’s leaking enough precum to fill my mouth.

She fondles my balls will she gently starts to finger my pussy. She seems upset that it’s so tight but she still has a plan. A metal belt floats towards her and begins to close around my waist, it covers my pussy and my dick while still leaving my oversized balls hanging out. My precum drips from the chastity belt like a leaky faucet.

“Now this little toy was made by me because of my… endowment.” The demoness says as she reverses her grip on me and lifts me up.

I’m still folded nearly in half as she teases my ass with her cock. She starts to slide it in and I feel my ass stretch out to an incredible size. She pushes more and more. I feel her cock going deeper into my body, going up to my chest. I know she’s only halfway in and I fear for my life. 

But the amount of pleasure is unbelievable. The cage I’m wearing is flooded with precum that runs like water. My prostate feels like it’s far more sensitive and I’m stuck on the edge. I try to take off my necklace so I can cum but with a wave of her arm the demoness turns it into a collar that I can’t remove.

She pushes me deeper onto her cock. Seemingly uncaring about my organs. It feels like they move out of the way for her as she drops me far enough onto her cock that I start gagging. She covers my mouth and when I start breathing through my nose it seems to get a bit better, but my eyes a rolled back and tears are falling.

With a final push her cock comes out of my mouth. I’ve been fully impaled on her cock. She uses me like a cocksleeve, her relatively massive body having no problem lifting my green goblin body.

I can’t do anything but drool as I her cock pierces through me. My eyes try looking for a brain that may as well be mush as my long tongue wraps around the tentacle that wiggles pleasurably in my body. 

The demoness moans loudly as her cock throbs and spurts out a massive amount of cum down the front of my body. She slowly lifts me off her cock as I feel a bulge push into my ass, followed by another and another.

She removes me slowly, waiting until she deposits an egg inside of me before moving me more and letting the next one be oviposited.

When I finally get off her cock I’m bulging with eggs. She brings me in front of a mirror, showing my bloated body and pointing out the demonic horns and much sharper teeth I have.

I guess I didn’t put up much of a fight.

Thanks for helping me with the CYOA polls. It was a lot of fun. You can find the choices I made Here.

Check out my Patreon if you want to support me.

[cthrnschumacher]

I'm Yours - Ch. 7 Slow Dancing in the Dark

Toto's POV

We exited my hotel room; I started making my way to the elevator and managed to push the call button for it to come to my floor. I stand there with Y/N in my arms. I never thought carrying someone would be calming, but her weight is soothing, and she radiates such a warmth that I could be lulled to sleep. I don't know how, but her presence drowns out the world, making it feel like it is just the two of us, and everything is in the silence of the background. It all feels right, and it's only been a few days. Every time I leave her, I yearn for the next interaction with her. I know it's still early in whatever this will be, but I need her around me. She brings such serenity into my life that I never knew it was something I needed. Mindlessly, I enter the elevator and push the button to the parking garage. Taking a second to see how Y/N is, I see she is in the lull of sleep, but she still remains slightly aware of her surroundings; her breathing is shallow and steady. I kiss the top of her head; her reaction to my little gesture causes her to snuggle closer into my arms, purring out my protective nature to shield her from the world.

The elevator dings, pulling me from our bubble, and the doors slide open to the garage. I make a beeline to my car to maintain our closed-off world. On my way there, I try to nudge Y/N softly, "Y/N…..Y/N…. hey, we are at my car; I'm going to have to let down now, okay." I feel her head nod in acknowledging my next step. We reach my car, and I keep my grasp on her thighs but start to lower myself, almost like I'm squatting to allow her feet to touch the ground. Assuring that she is stable, I allow myself to stand straight again, pulling her towards me and keeping her close. This will enable me to reach into my pocket for the car's key fob to open the trunk and place her backpack there. I feel Y/N push her face into my torso, and I instantly wrap my arm around her waist to pull her closer as I reach to press the button that closes the trunk. I guided her to the car's passenger side and ensured she got in just fine. Closing the door behind her, I go to the driver's side and slip in to start the car ride to her home. I didn't need to input her address into the GPS; during these short few days, I memorized her way home. As I exit the hotel garage and enter the city streets, I glance over to see Y/N leaning close to my side of the car. I note it, allowing myself to drive out the city streets quickly. Once I reach and merge onto the highway, I allow my arm to rest on the center armrest and let my forearm dangle, which helps my hand to relax on her thigh. Doing so, she moves in closer to me and rests her head on my arm. If I wasn't driving, I wanted to capture this moment: how her head nuzzled into my arm and hugged my arm for comfort. These intimate moments make time fly at supersonic speed, yearning to have her sleep in my arms, keeping her close. My thoughts are endlessly about her. They jump from wanting to see her in the office and her outstanding work ethic to taking long walks or hiking with picnics as we are on our little adventures or just going on late-night drives and her being my little passenger princess right now. These ideas run wild with the amount I want to do with her, just the two of us.

I glance over to see how Y/N is doing; she's dozed off and looking peaceful. It hurts that I must leave in two days; I will miss her. I have never liked long-distance relationships, but there is a first for everything, and I want to ensure it works with her. I can't lose her; I don't want to lose her. I reflect on my thoughts and know it's coming off as desperate, but it's quite the opposite. I have never found someone like her who gave me butterflies, and I want to be around her. As cheesy as it sounds, it is love at first sight, and I hate to have to put distance now when I feel we are having a great start to our connection. But this could be a great test; see how she reacts, and it will be a learning moment for her. I have been in a few, but our connection is different. With the others, they were almost needy in the contact and affection that was required of me. Y/N isn't like that. These past few days, I've gotten to know her. She is independent, intelligent, caring, and wholehearted in every action she takes. It took someone caring and loving for her to want that affection. I know she is competent on her own, and she has acknowledged it as well, but I can see that it puts her at ease not to take control, and I want to be that stability for her, as patriarchal as that sounds. And don't get me wrong, I want her to be successful, and I will let her do that. I don't want to limit the opportunities the world offers her because she deserves them all. After all, she is hard-working and earnest.

Too wrapped up in my thoughts, I realize that the next exit will soon take me to her house, and we will be there in a few short minutes. It's pretty dead on the streets where she lives, so I slow down to savour my time with her, but it still manages to go by quickly. I pull up close to her house, just a block away, to ensure none of her family members see me. I nudge her slightly to get her to wake, "Schatzi…..Y/N darling….. it's time to wake up…" I see her straighten up and lift her head off my arm. She looks up with the cutest sleepy eyes, and my heart hurts more to bother her peace. She takes a few seconds to recognize where she is and nods. "… awww, come here…." I chuckle softly at her disorientation but kiss her forehead; she leans into it more as if she doesn't want to leave. I pull back, bend down to capture her lips one last time and exit the car to open the trunk and get her bag. She was already out of the car, and I came to her side. I look down at how precious she is. God, she makes saying goodbye so tricky; I pull her in for a hug and rub her back. I speak just above a whisper, "I know Y/N…. it pains me to separate from you…. but we must." She nods, pulls away, and I see her walk to her house. When I see her entire garage and it closes, I get in the car and pull up closer to her house. She flickers the lights, signalling she is in her room, and with that, I drive off and back to the hotel similarly when dropping off the offer Y/N. I keep one hand on the steering wheel and place my other like I had Y/N holding my arm and resting her head on it. It's late in the night; the roads are dead, and it doesn't take me long to get back to the hotel.

I enter the parking garage and park in the same spot I had previously. Ensuring that my car is locked, I go upstairs and head straight to my room. The smell of Y/N is still faint in the air, making my lips curl slightly, feeling her presence. I strip from my sweats and the black cable-knit wool-cashmere sweater, and I'm not surprised that I'm semi-hard; I still feel her presence, the smell of and reminisce of what happened on the bed that I'm going to be sleeping in, which makes me react this way. But I don't act on the urge. I feel at ease with the night, just laying there and drifting into sleep, wishing she was in my arms. I hug the pillow I had placed for her; it smells of her, causing me to succumb to my sleepiness.

Before I knew it, it was 5:30 am, and I felt well-rested. I manage to still hug the pillow, but feel bliss that her scent is still there. She is all I think about now; I even dream of her, showering her with the affection she deserves, not just emotionally but physically. I decided to send her a message for when she woke. I grab my phone off the nightstand and unlock it. I go to my messages and click on her name when we become official; I can't wait to change her contact to something else. I thought briefly about what to type and decided on something simple, but I didn't want to overwhelm her.

Good Morning Princess

Yesterday was intense, but it was the right kind, and I won't lie; she glowed after being thoroughly fucked out, even if it was from my mouth and fingers doing it. And I just keep recalling her blissfullness. The way her pussy just squeezes my fingers, fuck, I just want to feel her walls clamp on my cock, to see her stomach bugle being deep in her. Her looking of being overstimulated, fuck, I lost control of myself just seeing her in that state, spasming from my doing. It makes my cock rock hard. I couldn't help but stroke myself slowly. She gets me horny, and sure, my sex drive is high, but fuck with Y/N, it's a whole new level, and I love every second. I keep with slow strokes. It's the idea of just teasing and becoming a leaking mess for her; the high of just edging myself because of her makes my cock leak with precum. And I won't lie the sight of my cock just makes the teasing all the better; the tip is achingly red and asking for attention. I can feel the blood pulsing in my cock as I slowly stroke my hand up and down, and the slight of precum just oozing out would put me over the edge. I let go of cock and just see it stand on its own, and the fact it twitches from the teasing makes me horny. I decided that this energy should be used well and think I should go to the gym.

I get out of bed and put on my sweats from last night, forgoing underwear and wanting to just feel my sensitive cock move freely. I also put on my gym shirt from the day before and take a chance to look in the mirror. Deciding that my appearance was decent, but I took slight issue with the way my dick was tenting in my sweats. I won't lie. It was kinda hot to see it like that, but if I was in public, it was best I not be too indecent. I decide to pull my dick up, and it sits flat onto my navel, being held there, the waistband of my sweats. It doesn't make my hard cock noticeable because of the shirt, which is a plus, but it would later be my demise. I grab my headphones and room key and head out. I decide to retake the stairs to the gym; to my luck, it's empty again. I head straight to the treadmill and just start with a walking pace. As I began to slow, I couldn't help but feel my cock leak with precum. It was soon then done I realized the friction with my sweats and my cock being held in place flat against my navel by the waistband of my sweats, providing enough friction to make it leak. Smile slightly at the stimulation, like fuck the light pressure, and the rubbing feels fantastic, but I suppress the urge and start jogging. Finally finishing up on the treadmill, I decided today would be an excellent chance to work my legs. I opened the notes app again and pulled up my leg routine. The gym isn't like a regular gym, so I have to substitute some of my exercise with alternatives. Since I'll be focusing on the quads, hamstrings and calves, and if I have time, we will also do a bit of core exercise. Since there aren't that many machines for legs, I use the free weight to get the most leg exercise, and I decided to make it a split circuit session to make it the most intense. I determined the order to be Bulgarian divided squats, stiff leg deadlifts, and weighted calve raises, doing six sets of each exercise, eight reps of the weight. It wasn't too bad; it was an average pace like all my workouts. After finalizing the plan, I walk over to the dumbbells and start with a lightish weight for my first two sets. Breezing through the first exercise circuit, I take a small break, sip some water and continue this, gradually increasing the weight every 2 sets. I keep going on until I'm done with my last set of weighted calve raises.

Walking over and re-raking the weights, I sit to calm down a bit from the exercise. Feeling less exhausted, I get up from the bench, exit the gym doors, and go to the elevator to return to my hotel room. I glance down at my phone, and it's now 7am; I don't see any missed notifications either, so I will continue until I need to start work. Finally arriving on my floor, I head to open the door, enter my room and turn on the lights. I turn on the lights in the washroom and get all my things prepared to shower. Once that is done, I grab the hotel phone, dial-up for room service, and order the same thing I had last time. Finally placing the order for my breakfast and hanging up the phone, I head back to the washroom to shower.

I turn on the tap to get the water running so I don't hop in. When the water is freezing, I take the chance to strip off gym clothes. Stepping into the shower, I step under the shower head and let myself soak under the water. I let the warm water run down my head and body. Feeling I had let myself sit under the water for a reasonable amount of time, I grabbed the washcloth, poured some shower gel, and started lathering my body. Feeling I covered every inch of my body in studies, I stepped back under the shower head and rose off. Feeling refreshed and clean, I turn off the shower tap, step out, grab a towel and start drying off. Wrapping the towel around my body, I step out of the washroom. I first turn on the TV to help decide on my outfit based on the weather. I concluded that it was practically the same weather as yesterday, so I spiced it up with dark tan chinos, a white dress shirt and a black cable-knit wool-cashmere sweater over the top. I decided on the sweater I wore last night, but I plan on gifting it to Y/N as a goodbye present. It's a little cheesy, but I want her to have it, to remember me, to feel close on days when she struggles the most and wants to be in my arms. I wear it often to make sure it smells like me and always comfort her even though we will be miles apart. Feeling my heart skip a beat at the thought and reflexively biting my lower lip in excitement, I get dressed and spray a heavy amount of deodorant and cologne, ensuring she receives the perfumey smell mixed in with my natural musk as I wear it. Finishing with looking presentable, I grab my tablet and skim over some of the work notifications I have to fill in my time as I wait for room service to bring my breakfast.

A few moments later, there is a knock at my door, in which it is my breakfast. I let them in to place it on the table, and soon enough, they are out. I finally take a chance to dig in and get some food into my system. While doing so, I checked my phone to see if Y/N was finally awake; sure enough, there was a good morning text. I smile, see her response, and click on our text messages. I decided to text back to see how she slept, and I got even more excited seeing the little text bubble pop up indicating that she was typing her message. I shove more food into my mouth to fill this waiting time. And see her response,

Good! Slept through the entire night for once!

I'm glad to hear that she rested well; I am a little concerned, tho when she says for once, she makes it seem like she doesn't sleep often; this will be something later, but for now, I'm just happy she slept well. But my next concern is if she is sore from our activities yesterday. I figured out how to respond briefly, but I also inquired about her actual state of being. I finally decided on a reply,

That's good to hear. How are you feeling about last night, and soreness or muscle aches? Just making sure you're okay.

I hope she sees the sincerity in my concern. I want to take our activities further, and it's adorable that she is naive to this realm, but if last night was just a taste of what could come, I want to make adjustments to make it more pleasurable without exhausting her. I saw her typing again, so I put down my phone for a second to eat some food and take a sip of coffee, which was ample time for her to reply. Her text was adorable,

That is probably the reason why I slept so well.

It had the emoji with hands hiding the face. Even through text, she still knows how to portray her shyness; she is so expressive, and seeing her this way is lovely. From what I get so far, she seems pretty reserved, and the more we talk, the more that breaks. Deciding it is time to change the subject, I reply:

Well, I'm glad you're okay and slept well from it ;). What are your plans for today?

I see her start typing again. I wish I could be having this back and forth over the phone, but I don't know how comfortable she is; I also don't want to overstep just yet. See that she replied

There's not much going on. I'm just studying and getting work done at home today! Why, what's up??

I decided on making the trip to see her since she's home, but I want to first see if she is okay with it.

Are you okay if I stop by? I want to see you one last time before my flight tomorrow if that's okay?"

I see her typing again, but I now have my gut flipping in nervousness, hoping she doesn't shoot down the inquiry. I set my phone down again, took a few more bits of my breakfast, and sipped my coffee. I still don't see a response and try not to overthink it. Maybe she is just doing something and not readily at her phone right now, or I shouldn't look into this small action so much. Slightly shaking the thought from my head and taking more food while focusing on the TV, I see several notifications pop up. I took a second to breathe and unlock my phone. Her reply was in several short texts.

Of course, it is! Tho just be here after 1:30pm, and you might have to leave at 5pm I just don't want anyone in my family to see you Sorry if that's a lot to ask for I get it if that's also a lot to ask for, and if you don't want to come, I get that as well.

I reread those messages. It's cute that she wants to sneak around, and I won't lie, I understand where she is coming from; all of this is relatively new to the both of us, and we don't want a lot of people knowing until we are both sure we can handle the heat.

Yes, that shouldn't be a problem at all!

I see her typing immediately, and it makes me smile to know that I've made her day, even more so that she'll get to see me. I see her text pop up.

Great! See you soon!

I'm smiling ear to ear, to which I reply back reflexively at this point.

See you too!

I place my phone further away and slump into my chair, astonished. I get to see her one last time. It will be bittersweet, but I can't wait. With that, I continue eating breakfast and focusing on the local news. Even though it is background noise to the million thoughts racing in my head, it's not dead silence. Finally finishing breakfast in auto-pilot mode, I take the chance to look down at my watch to see the time; it is currently 8:30am, so I have a few hours to kill before I should actually make my way to her, and since I'm leaving the city, who knows how bad the traffic is so I know that I'll need to go the hotel roughly 12:30ish to make to her.

With that, I move from the table where I had breakfast to the desk. I sign in to my laptop and set up my tablet to get started on some work that requires my attention. I have a meeting today to talk to some team members about coordinating the Y/N fellowship for the year. We were thinking about the logistics of this, which means we would want her to start when the next season starts, and since we are in October, these logistics need to happen quickly. That is the first meeting I will be jumping into, which is ironically happening now. Logging into the team meeting mainly involves HR personnel and a few other members. I see the Head of HR, several assistants, and some of our staff do some DEI work. I pulled up the agenda for the meeting and saw the discussion of the fellowship opportunity, along with the Professor of the course. The meeting started by approving the agenda, which was done smoothly. Now, we have transitioned into a quick discussion of the items before getting onto the topic of the Y/N fellowship. The leader of the meeting first handed off the debate to the Professor.

We first finalize the idea that instead of a studying abroad program, which is only a few months, this will be considered a fellowship, in which Mercedes AMG Petronas F1 Team will award the fellowship to Y/N to research DEI in the Motorsport industry and how to enhance inclusivity not only within the industry but more within the teams. We decided the fellowship would be a year-long concurrent with the race season, which she will start after the FIA gala and finish the following year around that same time. This means she will need to put her next semester on pause for her courses and come to the UK as of December and finish her classes online. It shouldn't be too hard; we will collaborate with her professors to adjust to the new schedule. I will give her a brief update when I see her later today. Still, since most things are not concrete, we need to have a few more meetings within the next week to figure out how to accommodate her stay and more of the course content. We would want to make this a fruitful fellowship. We end this meeting on good terms, and I hope to go into the next meeting on car development for the upcoming season. In this meeting, I can sit back a bit more and listen to how the development is going and the direction the team is taking.

The meeting ended in no time, and I let my team know I would be taking the afternoon off and wouldn't be in much contact. Shutting down my laptop, I left it at my desk in the hotel room, grabbed my bag, and placed my tablet there, deciding to show Y/N the preliminary logistics of the fellowship. Once that is done, I slip on my loafers and jacket, then placing my wallet and room key in my pocket, I head out the door with my bag over my shoulder. Since the day was sunny, I put my sunglasses on and went to the elevator to head down to the parking garage. Exiting, I unlock my car, heading straight to the driver's side and slipping in. I place the shoulder bag on the passenger. Closing the door behind me, I turn on the car, get the seat belt on, reverse out and make my way over to Y/N's house. Even though I knew the exact way to her house, I put her address into the GPS to see how long during the day time if it would take to get to her house; it wasn't so bad, 45 to 50 minutes until I reached her home. That should put me close to meeting her at 1:30, with some time to spare. If I arrive early, I see a grocery store and might pick up some of her favourite snacks. I don't like the idea of showing up empty-handed, and I know I can't bring her flowers since she admitted that she didn't want anyone in her family to know, so her favourite snacks will suffice.

As I drove there, it turned out my plan was right, and I decided to head up to the grocery store to pick up her snacks. It only takes me a few minutes since Twizzlers and energy drinks are in the same aisle. Grabbing the items and cashing out the self-checkout. I return to my car, place them in the bag, and start my journey to see Y/N. In a few minutes, I'm finally at her house. I stopped on a different street from her home and pulled out my phone. I unlock my phone and open the messaging app. I click her name and text her, letting her know I'm here. I leave my car, grab my shoulder bag, and walk to her house. It was a relatively minute walk, and I saw the garage door to her house open up. She was standing at the top of the stairs leading inside her house with an adorable grin plastered on those beautiful lips. I'm lucky to have my sunglasses on; I take the movement to scan my eyes up and down her body; she has on leggings like yesterday, and she's wearing a zip-up hoodie that zips up a little less than halfway. It showed a cute little bralette; her hair was up in a ponytail, and her curls were a little frizzy but coiled enough, making it look like she styled it a bit. I enter her garage, and she immediately clicks the button to close it behind me.

I get closer to her as she is still standing on the stairs and in the doorway, where I lift my sunglasses up for them to rest on my head. I make eye contact with her as she stands, where she is almost my height. "Hi" "Hi" "How was the drive-in? I hope traffic wasn't so bad?" "No, it wasn't, but I'm happier to see you." She bit her bottom lip at the remark, and a blush creeps. She makes me melt at how reactive she is. "why don't you just come on in?" "Sure." "Would you mind taking off your shoes? We don't wear them around the house." "Of course I can…" "Would it also be too much to ask you to bring them upstairs? I just don't want anyone to see in case you need to sneak out." "Awe, of course, only to make you feel more comfortable." I smile up at her, and we lock eyes. I wink at her for a second. Her cheeks turn crimson.

I enter her house; it's quite a lovely modern home with a few antique items. I slip off my loafers and grab them to bring them up. "Follow me," which I helplessly do; I assume she is taking me to her room. I know it sits atop the garage as she flickers the lights whenever I take her home. I follow her; as we make our way up the staircase, I see the master bedroom and another bedroom, and I see a room at the end of the hall that seems to be her room, as the desk is the first thing I see with a monitor and laptop that is on. She enters first, and as I follow behind her, I start looking around; her room is nice, it's white with a plum accent wall. Her room is enormous enough, with a queen-sized bed in the middle resting against the accent wall; it has an in-wall bench; it fits her perfectly.

"You can sit on the bed or the bench if you want; you can place the shoes on the bench with your book bag." "Sure."

I do as she recommends, placing both down, and I remove my jacket and put it beside them. I turn around and catch her eyeing me up and down. It's cute to see her in the act, and I decide to step closer, and her eyes lock with mine. I speak just above a whisper at how incredibly close we are, "I miss you," "Me too," and I place a hand at her waist to pull her in, and I cup her cheek to lean down and kiss her softly. I couldn't tell you how long we kissed, but it was slow and felt like an eternity. I pull away and lean my forehead against hers; I hear her say, "How do I miss you this much? I don't want you to go…" "I know, but it won't be long until you see me again." It was an honest answer; it pained me to hear her say that, and I kissed her forehead. I grab her hand, walk over to her bed, and take a seat, sitting almost in the center of the bed. My legs open, and she steps to stand between them, but what shocks me is she sits on my lap.

Instantly put my hands around her waist to steady her but to pull her in. She rested her head on my shoulder, and I decided to make the moment more enjoyable. I lie down with her, causing her to squeal at the action, and I chuckle. Entirely lying down with her almost on top of me, she giggles and rests her chin on my chest as she looks me in the eyes. I can tell she is thinking about something and decides to entertain it for a little, "Penny for you thought?" "Well, I was thinking about the fellowship, and I know it's only been like a day or two since I've asked, but has there been any discussion yet?" It is as if she can read me like an open book, and I decide to fill her in on the details. "Actually, there has been. Would you like to see some of the things we discussed?" but then I lift my head up and whisper, "But I would have to swear you to secrecy." I feel her giggle with her on top of me, and she frantically nods.

I bite my lip and gently remove her from me. I got up and walked over to my book bag. Her excitement and anticipation put me over the moon; I turned back and walked to the bed and found Y/N in the center, sitting and waiting patiently. I sit down with one leg hanging off the side of the bed with the other bent. I open the book bag and decide to give her the snacks I got her, "But first, I didn't really want to come empty-handed, so I got you these," and handed her the Twizzlers and energy drinks. "awe, Toto you didn't have too" "Schatzi, I know, but I wanted to, plus there is more, but that is for later."

She raises her single eyebrow like I do but dismisses it immediately, knowing that if she doesn't accept, she will end up with items regardless. I pulled out my tablet and opened up some of the documents being reviewed today and some of the notes I'd made. I knew this conversation would be lengthy, so I also took hold of the stylus in case Y/N had questions and could pose them to the team.

I started explaining the logistics, in which it will be a year-long fellowship; the team is looking to possibly start in November or December; for that start, she would need to complete onboarding, and we would have to figure out what finishing this semester will look like. The allotted credits will be an entire course load, allowing her to complete her degree on time to graduate with her class. We then move the discussion to living accommodations, which my team will provide for the follow-up. She is technically employed under the team, with a contract to sign, NDAs, and other documents. Since she will also be travelling with the team and will be working under the FIA as well, I informed her that my team is also working on her visa applications and FIA documents for her to do legal work and research under our team and FIA board and ensuring that we can adequately pitch the idea to research other teams and participants at the races. The last thing we discussed was the living accommodations; I told her the team would provide her with all the support she needed. I have yet to say to her that even though she will get money for the support, she will live with me.

"Did you have any questions, or did you want to wait until you get the actual contract with all of it written out?" "I can wait, Toto; I would like to see it in writing because that would be considered a binding contract." "I understand; it will take another week or so." "Yeah, that's no problem; just see it in writing." "I get that."

I place my tablet back in my book bag and turn back to her; Y/N is biting her bottom lip as if she is thinking of something. She then leans in and kisses me softly. I cup her face with my hand and kiss her back; I turn my body more and gently nudge her to lie down. The kiss became more passionate, and she wrapped her arms around my neck; she tangled her hands into my hair and slightly tugged the hair near the nap of my neck. I start moving my hands up and down her body, just wanting to feel more of her. I pull away from kissing her lips and start peppering them down her jaw to her neck. I kiss that sweet spot close to her ear, and she starts moaning. I travel my hands down to her body and tug at the hoodie. I feel her head nod, and I take that as a sign and unzip her hoodie and slip it off her, exposing her skin, now covered in goosebumps. I feel her legs wrap around my waist, and feeling her wanting more friction ignites me to go further. I move my hand back up her body until I reach her bralette and massage her breast. My little action causes her to arch her body in my hand; I smile and kiss her neck, to which I then use my thumb and gently rub it over her nipple, which starts to pebble. Making sure to treat both her breasts with just as equal attention, I start kissing down her neck, to her collarbone and then her breast. I tug at Y/N's bralette with my teeth. "ahhh… yes… toto… please…" Hearing her beg just purrs at my possessive side, especially when she is such an angel doing unholy things.

My hands do quick work to remove her bralette, and I attach my mouth and start flicking her nipple; her whimpers get louder, and she pushes her head further into her body, sucking more and making sure her nipple is wet; I unlatch my mouth and blow lightly at the patch of wetness on her nipple, she whimpers more and arching her back up. I give the same attention to her other nipple and tug at her leggings; she nods again. Hooking my fingers at the waist of her leggings and start pulling them down her hips along with her panties while I'm still sucking her nipples. She unhook her legs from my torso to allow me to pull them off completely; she now lying underneath me in all her glory. I pull away from her nipple for a final time and blow softly, and the patch of wetness, she whimpers from the clash of temperature on her body. I trail my hand down her body to between her legs, running my fingers and feeling the wetness between her legs, "awe, my little princess is so wet, just for me."

She moans at my touch and words, "Daddy…. please", her desperate sound of wanting more friction, I smear her wetness all over her pussy, causing her to buck up when I rub my palm over her clit. Smiling at her reaction, "Come on princess, open your legs for daddy." She does so immediately, opening wide for me to see her snatch glistening from her slick. "Dripping just for me, Daddy barely did anything" I look up to see her looking intently at me, her pupils blown wide; I seize the moment to lay down, causing the mattress to dip and putting her legs on my shoulders and blow a little at her cunny while looking directly at her. That moment of seeing her eyes roll to the back of her head, then being tossed back, and her whimpering made me latch my mouth onto her clit, tonguing the bundle of nerves. I kept a steady rhythm and preventing her from bucking her hips into my head, I kept my arms wrapped around her waist to steady her. She tasted too sweet, and all I could do was lap her pussy with my tongue, focusing more on her clit before sucking. Her moans, more engaged, "Daddy, please… I… I'm gonna cum" "Cum for me, princess," sucking on her labia and licking a flat stripe up her pussy. "Let me taste you, princess. Make a mess for Daddy." With another suck on her clit, she fell apart in high keening moans escaping and writhed helplessly in my grasp. "ohh, that's such a sweet, creamy pussy for Daddy." Her juices kept flowing as a tonguing her now overstimulated pussy.

Loosening my grasp around her waist, I crawl back up to Y/N and kiss her softly, her moaning into the kiss, tasting herself on my lips; she pulls away with a wicked grin on her face, "Your turn, Daddy," Shocked by her remarks. I go to sit on the edge of the bed; she crawls to me and straddles my lap, and my hands instantly fly to her waist. She pulls at my collar to bring me into a searing, hot kiss, but she starts biting and tugging at my bottom lip. Even though my cock has been problematic since our start, this is straining more against the confinement of my pants. She starts roaming her hands down my torso, lifting the hem of the black sweater up until she reaches my neck. We break from the kiss, and she lifts the sweater off my arms and neck and throws it to the pile of clothes on the floor. Her lips are back on mine, kissing me passionately, and her hands make quick work on the buttons of my shirt. Doing so, she started kissing down my jaw and down my neck. I knew she was genuinely different when her lips landed on my neck, and she started nipping and leaving love bites in the spot just under my ear. Moaning her name and pulling her up against me more, leaving no space. Dazed in the sensation she was giving me, I hadn't realized she tugged the shirt out of my pants, slipping off my arms and discarding with the rest of the clothes. Her small hands roam my torse, wanting her to feel more of me, and she leaves kisses on my neck and chest. By this point, I'm panting, realizing what she is about to do. She lifts herself off from straddling my lap but still kisses down my chest, her hands fiddling with the button and zipper of my pants but manages to undo both, hooking her fingers on the waist and band of my pants and underwear, removing them in one go. I lift my hips up, giving her ease to do so. As she got them off, she kneeled in front of me, looking innocently, and all I could do was adore the sight in front of me, and my cock twitched with excitement.

I whispered softly, "It's okay, princess, don't be shy." I couldn't help but smile and continued, "Just give Daddy a kiss." I could see the hesitation while maintaining eye contact; her plump lips kissed the head of my cock, and I could help my groan. Her lips were unlike any other feelings. My cock oozed with precum. Her small hand wanted to wrap around my cock, but couldn't from its girth; she slowly stroked it while licking the head. I tossed my head back, grunting at her actions. I felt lost in English words and started reverting to German. She starts licking the entire length of cock, licking long strips on the understrip. I don't know how I recovered from the blissfulness and getting lost, but I bring my head back up to look down at Y/N.

I can see her visibly enjoying herself, giving pleasure to me. My head was swimming with lustful thoughts the more I could do with her. Until I felt more heat around the head of my cock to realize she popped the head of cock into her mouth, I had to suppress the urge to buck my hip up. I knew she had no experience, but her actions of tonguing and sucking on the tip of my cock could make her blow my seed at any second. "Ahh… princess… y.. you're gonna make daddy cum… if you continue." From that comment, she sucked harder on the tip, and I couldn't help but groan again, "fuck… princess… ahh… you love sucking daddy cock don't you…. fuck… you cock hungry … for daddy?" Her mouth made a popping sound, dropping my cock from her mouth while stroking the base of my cock. She looked up at me adoringly and kissed my thighs all the way up to my hip but whispered, "I love daddy's cock." She lowered her mouth to my cock again, sucking hard on the tip and stroking the base. Her actions brought me closer to my release, I was whimpering as she tongued the tip. Embracing the pleasure that Y/N has me in and edging me out for so long, I let my climax wash over me. Feeling my cock twitch in her mouth as ropes of my cum fill her. What I hadn't expected was for Y/N to suck harder, wanting to swallow my spend, mewing out in pleasure as Y/N sucked my oversensitive cock. Feeling that she has swallowed all of my spent, she pops her mouth off my cock, and shifts her gaze up to me.

[literaryfandomangel]

The Promise - Chapter Fourteen

After a week had passed, the worst of the pain was gone. It had faded, leaving a slight discomfort or stiffness in the joint when moving in specific ways. The bruise was fading, the edges a sickening yellow/green color. After several days of icing the injury, the swelling had gone down, which was a relief. It took about six days to be able to walk up and down the stairs without excruciating pain. 

"I'm leaving," Mom yelled, walking out the front door. I sat on the porch, realizing it was nearly five in the afternoon. I felt stir-crazy after being cooped up for so long; therefore, I sat upright.

"Can I come with you?" I asked Mom, eyes wide and pleading. She hesitated for a moment, but she couldn't deny my request. Mom was working the late shift at the video store, which closed at midnight. She didn't want me to regress in my recovery. Since being in Santa Carla, I had elected to speak more, and my weight was progressing slowly. 

"Alright," Mom conceded. "Will your friends bring you home?"

I shrugged, walking into the house to grab my bag. I put in a few books, primarily classics, but I had finished Anna Karenina. Depending on what the mood was tonight, I might start North and South. I decided that I could lose myself in the bookstore. 

"Hurry up!" Mom yelled into the house. I hesitated momentarily, sprayed perfume on my wrists, and left my bedroom. When I walked outside, Mom was already in the driver's seat. 

"If I don't find them, I'll meet you after your shift," I promised Mom during the drive. She hummed, accepting that answer. 

"Make sure that if you meet up with your friends, they have you back by 2 AM!" Mom shouted before going in the opposite direction on the Boardwalk. 

I gaped at the figure of my Mom, quickly losing her in the teeming crowd. She set my curfew at 2 AM? She never agreed that I could stay out that late - usually never. I wondered what made her change her mind, but I wouldn't argue with Mom. I tucked the $10.00 bill Mom handed me in the car into my back pocket and started to peruse the Boardwalk. 

The sun's rays were still hot. Therefore, I ducked into the bookstore. I felt relief at the air-conditioned space. Even though I'm always cold, the sun in Santa Carla felt like it would burn through your clothing. 

I started looking around the bookstore, realizing this was an adventure, not a bookstore. Apparently, the owner just shelved the books in any open slot. Therefore, the store was not organized. One might find a bodice-ripper beside a textbook. It was exciting and definitely a way to keep bookworms occupied. 

I grinned as I started to make my way through the shelves, picking out a book with an exciting title. I read the back and would make my determination. I was so lost in the world of books that I didn't realize how late it was or that the sun had long since been hidden behind the horizon. 

"Hey!" I whined when suddenly a hand took the book I was interested in right from my hands. I was upset until I looked at the culprit - Paul. He had a wide grin as he dangled the book before me. 

"Hey, baby," Marko whispered, voice smooth and deeper than usual. His breath was right on the tip of my ear. I could feel the ghost of his lips and the faint touch of his teeth on my earlobe. I gasped, jumping backward into a solid body. Gloved hands came to rest on my elbows. 

"We've missed you, princess," Dwayne said, leaning down to pick up the large stack of used books by my feet. It was a mess of about ten or so books that I was planning on purchasing. He looked down, reading the spines, giving hums of interest every so often. 

"You've been away, girl," Paul smirked, his usual bundle of energy. I wondered if Paul ever was still. Probably not, even when he was sleeping. I imagined Paul to kick and roll over. "And then you ditch us to come here? I'm hurt!"

"Paul," I sighed, rolling my eyes at his dramatics. I tried to grab the book back from his hands. I took a few steps forward, away from David's body heat. My movement exposed the slight limp from my previous injuries. To the human eye, it would be imperceivable, but they were vampires and could see it. Paul's fist clenched in fury as he remembered the fear they all felt coming upon that scene. 

None of the Lost Boys ever thought they would find their mate. A mate to have, to hold, to protect, to cherish. In the vampire world, mates were the most precious thing to find. Not everyone found their mates - some wandered for centuries looking for the scent that linked their nest to their mate. Therefore, seeing their mate in any type of danger was difficult. Worse still, when the worst threat came from their mate's volition. 

Paul's eyes softened enough to cease his teasing behavior. He slowly lowered his hands, the book just out of reach of my fingers. Paul had a smirk on his face while I was getting frustrated. Every time my fingers reached out and touched the book's paper, Paul would pull it out of reach. Finally, I just stood, a pout on my lips. 

Paul stood no chance, looking at my widened, sad eyes and pouty lips. He stood awestruck for a moment before lowering his hand. I clutched the book, holding it to my chest. I hesitated for a moment before I rose onto my toes. I kissed his cheek, feeling the slight roughness of his stubble, before sinking back onto the balls of my feet. Silence surrounded the five of us. 

It was like my spur-of-the-moment action had caused a ripple in the otherwise still lake. Initiating the contact would solidify the tentative situation between the four of us. I was also nervous because I had just kissed one of the four guys, showing an apparent interest in me. I hoped this wasn't going to cause a fight or any type of rift between the four guys. 

Chapter Fifteen

[maladaptive-day-dreams]

MORE FILTHY ROBIN THOUGHTS LET’S GO

(idk maybe that needs a tw so like drug use (weed))

okay so imagine going on late night drives with robin in summer. she just got her license because she finally saved up some money and is taking you everywhere now.

you blast fleetwood mac through her speakers and sing along together, drive all the way out to lovers lake and share a joint by the shore only to wait for the sunrise together.

and if that doesn’t sound tempting yet imagine robin fucking you by the lake. your back on the sand or over the hood of her car, or against a damn tree while she’s kissing down your body, fucking you softly and yet so so good.

your view is perfect, the sky is clear and you can see the stars shining above. the sound of small waves meeting the sand can barely be heard though, with how loud you’re crying out for her.

she’s whispering sweet nothings of how well you’re taking her and encouragements to moan just a little bit louder for her.

AAAAAAAH GOD WHY DO I KEEP DOING THIS TO MYSELF/US?! 😵‍💫

I have virtually nothing to add to this bc its perfect as is BUT I WILL SAY I got out of hand with my "virtually nothing" OOPS

You have me writing so much stuff these last few days oml ily ok I'm going to bed now GNIGHT ENJOY THIS

(oral (f-receiving obvi), fingering, multiple orgasms)

Robin definitely started with your back against a tree, one leg thrown over her shoulder your panties dangling on your ankle as it rests on her back. You've got one hand searching for purchase in the bark on the tree and the other tight in her hair as she kisses and sucks on your clit.

She shifts herself lower so her nose nudges your engorged bud with every lick of her tongue in your cunt. Robin's pulling out your moans with every thrust of her tongue into you. And as your wave of pleasure starts to crest, she picks up her pace and moves the hand that was resting on your stomach up under your shirt to grope at your tits, squeezing your breast and pinching your nipple until its hard and sensitive. She urges you closer and closer to the edge with her tongue and her hand on your chest until the knot in your stomach snaps and you come undone with her mouth on your pussy. She laps up your release as you give it to her, your back arching off the tree.

You pull her head from your cunt with the hand that grips her hair and blush as you witness the shine of your cum on her chin. She helps you stand on two legs again, pocketing your panties after they fall to the ground. You pull her into you and kiss her ravenously, tasting yourself on her lips and tongue. She pushes you back into the tree and you wrap your legs around her, her lips never leaving yours apart from brief pauses for breath.

You gasp into her mouth as she lifts you and holds you around her waist. You lose the roughness of the bark on your back as she walks you somewhere.

She sets you gently on the hood of her new car, the metal a cold sting through your thin shirt. She kisses down your neck and shoulder as she looms over you, her hand moving under your skirt again.

Kissing a line back up your neck she whispers sweet nothings in your ear as her fingers stroke your thighs until you're writhing and begging for her to fuck you with them.

"My good girl, you did so well, wanna make you feel good again, will you let me make you feel good again?" she asks, fingers running up and down your lips.

"Please," you beg through a whispered moan.

Robin smiles into the side of your neck as she lets two fingers run up your slit, spreading your wetness around them. "Look at me baby," she says lifting her face to look at you.

You open your eyes and turn your head towards her, following her direction. Your mouth drops open in a gasp when she slips two fingers into you. She rocks them in and out of you, keeping her eyes trained on your face, watching your mouth as you breath heavily with every thrust of her fingers into you.

"You're taking me so well baby."

You groan and screw your eyes shut, your pussy clenching around her fingers. "Oh FUCK," you moan as her thumb places pressure on your clit. The added stimulation makes the coil in your belly screw tighter and you bite your lip to keep in your noises.

"Let me hear you baby, lemme hear those sweet noises. Eyes open, let me look at you as you cum."

You do as your told, keeping your eyes trained on hers as she picks up the pace of her fingers and presses her thumb in faster circles around your clit.

Your back arches off the hood as you grind your pussy into her hand chasing your second orgasm. You both know you're close so as she fucks up into you the last few times, she whispers "yeah? yeah? yeah?" in time with the three big breaths you take before your hips are stuttering and your cunt is clenching around her fingers as you soak her hand with your cum.

She removes her fingers from you and jogs to the trunk of the car to pull out a beach towel that you were both going to sit on to watch the water (which is a long forgotten plan now) and wipes off her hand before running it softly up your legs and pussy. You stay laying on the hood of her car, breathing heavy, as she moves around the car to toss the towel back in the trunk. Robin comes back and gets onto the hood beside you and you spend the next thirty minutes staring at the stars and talking before it gets too cold to stay out anymore.

You get in the car and Robin starts driving you home as you pepper kisses along her neck and shoulder, letting her know what you plan on doing when you get there. (It's her, you plan on doing her.)

[ahsoka-in-a-hood]

So the Ahsoka show happened, right? It was certainly...a show of all time.

But anyways, I'm interested to know what concepts about like Ahsoka and like her character you would want to see. If there was a Ahsoka show catered to you specifically. Like what arcs, what explorations of her past, what characters that are important to her would make a return? I'm just curious to see how different people on here that are super into Star Wars stuff have like different interpretations of what they would want her character to go.

*shrug* It's not like I hated it. My expectations weren't all that high (I'm well aware of filoni's limitations. I've been rewatching tcw lately and getting whammied all over again with how lazy the world-building and characterization of secondary characters can get. + the stuff I disagree with. and yet here I am!)

It's sort of difficult to say what a show catered to me would look like because a lot of what would be fun to see can't happen- everything has to comply on a basic level with the OT and with the sequels, so... there are so many things she can't do, places she can't go, people she can't see, goals she cannot achieve. She is doomed to exist on the margins and there's just more tragedy on the horizon. And I find myself disinterested in the build up to the sequels. In general but also specifically based on what I've seen in the mandalorian and in ahsoka. It hasn't grabbed me.

I guess I would have liked a continuation of her and Rex in the early rebellion? I didn't really want the bad batch, I wanted a tcw sequels about tcw characters >: |

Even if we skipped a lot, I do like that we see her take on her own apprentice and how learning that her Master was vader affected her. Mortis was never my favorite arc of the clone wars, but it is a dangling thread and it is a way to do something with her story that takes her away from the movies narrative, and I am interested to see what the hell is going to happen there.

Ahsoka has a lot of compelling elements, story-wise. There's being Anakin's apprentice of course, with him being halfway to the dark already, and all the ways she saw the best of him, but also did not escape his shadows. There's being a wartime padawan, a casualty, coming of age in a crumbling house. There's her leaving the order, and there's her losing them... tcw leaves her in such a place, she is not allowed a single victory.

In the end I suppose what I would want for her is to be a jedi. I was thinking the other day about how unlike Anakin, who was torn between two paths, Ahsoka never really wanted to be anything else, never really wanted to do anything else.

Edit: Oh, I have to admit, if we ever got more Obi Wan, I would like to see Deborah Chow take on her and obi wan together. Their last interactions were so juicy, and while I've decided they don't leave things in a terrible place I still want moar