#looks at schedule* tbh.. give me like another week for it actually

[intotheelliwoods]

Yeah aha 👍This week along with last week were midterms too, which was fine up until my car decided to break down on me Sunday! Still recovering from all... that atm, so sorry for the lack of art from me! I promise I am still here and alive and well :)

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But you see, poptart is sprouts braincell... and sprout is poptarts braincell.... do you see the cycle? the dependence??? DID YOU TAKE POPTART? WHAT DID YOU DO WITH HIM.

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@domsakromsa08 WAA thANK YOU!!!!! I AM STILL IN SHOCK OVER ALL TEH FANART I GOT LAST UPDATE HAHA thank you for the addition! <3 <3

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Today I learned about the musical Into The Woods....

Haha theres so many interpretations for my username....

My username 'elliwoods' is just a play on the name Elwood, yknow like the blues brother! 'intotheelliwoods' I will admit.... I forget most of its origin but I think I was slightly inspired from the streamer inthelittlewood even though I dont even watch him pfft-

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@justletmereadmycomics @cavern-of-shenanigans aaaaah I am so so happy people liked that last update :) I have been planning it for ages! And sorry, no, I will not be paying for anyones therapy.....

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I am too biased for this question.....

[x-liv25-jamieswife]

ok I’m sorry about having you write those heartbreaking Grayson hcs, I’m gonna be honest they made me sob so hard 😭 so let’s get some happy Grayson ones (I loved that last one by the way, he’s so cute)

happy grayson head canons

of course, i have made another grayson post (some are happy, some are sad), but i'll make another one bc he's everything (it might be shorter though).also i have no idea what 'happy' head canons are so here are some that aren't sad (some funny, some happy, some embarrassing, etc). hope you like them <3. @lanterns-and-daydreams helped with some of these

he doesn't smile often, but when he does you see his little dimples (idk if this is canon but, if it isn't, i like the idea of him having dimples)

he talks to their dog, tiramisu, in a really high pitched voice

he works out religiously. he has like a schedule and everything, and he sings when he works out.

he watches my little pony as a guilty pleasure. xander knows and is using it as blackmail material.

he desperately wants a cat but doesn't want their dog to kill it.

he has an obsession with is ass. he takes pride in it being big and juicy.

he's jealous of jameson bc he's an inch taller than gray is, and he uses it against him.

he joined a yoga group without knowing it was for girls only, so now, once a week, he gossips and does yoga with these old ladies.

he loves face masks more than anything. xander and jameson have tons of pictures of him with cucumbers on his eyes and a face mask.

he doesn't like colors. if someone were to ask him what his favorite color is, he'd just say black or white or smth

he loves composing his own piano pieces and playing them to his brothers and the others.

he despises sex education with a passion. whenever he used to have those classes in school, he would blush so hard the teachers thought he was having a stroke or some shit

grayson loves poetry (ik this was mentioned in tbh, but i hc he still does it for fun to express his emotions (he didn't stop after the one year challenge))

when he was younger, he really liked snails. he used to collect some and give them a 'home' in jars he found around the mansion.

he's a sucker for matchas. he literally makes himself one every morning before he starts working. (he has a cup with cats on it that he uses every day)

he owns a human dog bed (if you don't know what it is, search it up)

he once tried to watch p*rn to see what the hype is all about, but he got so disgusted and uncomfortable he threw away his laptop.

all of the pens in his pen collection are placed side by side from smallest to biggest in his drawer.

he has the biggest walk in closet you can imagine (bigger than barbie's)

xander once bought him a skirt and dared him to go to work wearing it. pictures of it got out and his fans started calling him baby girl.

he makes playlist for his favorite book couples.

this dude cannot smirk for the life of him. he looks like a constipated sloth when he tries to.

he can do the splits perfectly.

when someone kicks him in the balls, he sounds like a dying hyena. he just wheezes for like 5 minutes straight whilst everyone just looks at him in horror. he then wobbles away.

he's a really good just dance player. he actually laughs when he plays.

grayson knows how to pole dance.

when he was younger, he was jealous that jamie had more prominent abs so he used to contour his to make them look like jamie's

when he was younger, he tried to learn how to purr. he thought it would be cool

he wanted to be like nash so bad when he was younger than he would stick a hay strand in his mouth and try to speak in a southern accent. skye was mortified.

grayson loved flower crowns. xander used to make him some and he would walk around wearing them proudly.

he wears subtle makeup sometimes (when he's in the mood) (blush, concealer, very subtle eyeliner, etc)

when he was younger, he would also try to gallop around like a horse. he would get on his hands and knees and strut around (tobias wanted to kill himself)

[weebsinstash]

I sent an ask responding to the Izuku parts that I hope you got.(if not fml)

But I figured I should send a separate ask to talk about Miguel.

So like my thoughts have been centering on this scenario where you're his secretary or assistant because he is the CEO. He's a beta and you're an omega.

You guys have a purely professional relationship, tbh half the time he doesnt even realize you got you're heat and just finds out you called in when you dont respond. Really the only thing he cares about is you doing your work, getting it done on time, and not half-assing it.

But then he gets the spider DNA and everything goes to shit. Not only does the spider DNA give him extra abilities and enhanced senses, but it also gives him some alpha traits/tendencies.

He goes in to work thinking it'll help distract him and get him back in the rhythm of everything only to just get fucking hit in the face with your scent. Queue him rushing past because it takes everything in him not to just pounce on you.

But as I said, he only got a few alpha traits. He didnt actually become an alpha. So while he's out here wanting to just pin you to his or your desk, knot and claim you....he's completely incapable. His body is completely incapable of performing those actions and it only leans into his yandere behavior and tendencies.

I've also been think like(depending on how one writes abo), sometimes betas dont have a sent or if they do its extremely faint. Yandere beta miguel who cant even smother you in his scent because he basically doesn't have one, meanwhile you dont even realize he's changed at all because you cant smell it.

Though because he doesnt have a scent he would absolutely sneak into your house/appartment. Its basically the only upside in his eyes.

Also anytime you go into heat and have to miss work? He is immediately taking your seat from your desk and huffing it while he touches himself. Then at night as spiderman will come just close enough to be able to smell you but still not lose control of himself, absolutely getting off on your scent and sounds of pleasure from you using a toy.

God this shits been living in my brain rent free for like the last week and wont go away 😭

I got the Izuku ask :) trust me when I say I am simply dogshit awful at getting back to people and being consistent

Picture if Reader is actually a really competent employee of his at Alchemax but Miguel like BARELY pays any mind to you because, you know, he's got all sorts of shit constantly stressing him out and occupying his mind on top of migraine, and suddenly you're going into work and bringing him his preferred coffee as usual when, he tries to make small talk? You've worked for this man for like at least a year, basically only speaking when necessary, and one day you lean over to put a coffee or some papers on his desk and that brings you just close enough for him to take in a breath of your scent which instantly helps alleviate his headaches

You're basically done giving him what he needs and you're literally about to leave the room when he suddenly calls out (almost in a "wait I need to catch you before you leave" kind of urgency) and you pause and look at him with those big eyes of yours he suddenly can't stop staring into when Romeo hits you with "so .... how are you?"

And you're just kind of stunned for a few moments because this is a man who basically doesn't speak to you unless he needs something, even when you go to him to pass along a message or something or other about his schedule and your secretarial duties it's typically just a sort of "got it, thank you" sort of response and you're sent on your way again, or given another task, so in ao forth. You basically can't get a good read on the man's personality because he simply doesn't talk to you enough or at least about anything other than work

He officially enters the Goo Goo Eyes Zone where when you like someone almost everything about them is so cute and had more meaning than it actually does and is basically finally seeing you for the first time. He FINALLY notices what kinds of perfumes/body mists you like to use to smell nice even if it's something you've worn for ages, the ways you prefer to style yourself, which little accessories or rings or whatever may be your favorite, little mannerisms you may have like clicking pens or singing little songs when you think you're along, like when you're doing something and it's you're just like occasionally singing, like he finds you washing a coffee cup in the break room all "--and its doooOooone!"

The need to learn more about you escalates because suddenly he's like "wait I've known them for all this time and never noticed all these things, what ELSE don't I know?" And it really is an obsessive infatuation. You live in a high rise where you don't really have to worry about closing your blinds or anything which is perfect for Miguel "don't you know i have enhanced senses" O'Hara to watch you from the roof of the next building over. You never lock your windows because, what's the point? He starts learning your schedule and meticulously taking all kinds of notes until it's the level of him outright entering your apartment to snoop through all of your things and potentially plant bugs and cameras

One day you're opening your window and kind of poke your head out to look at the city and you notice weird sorts of, almost gouges in the wall outside? What are those from? (Well sweetie, turns out, when you were going to town on yourself last night to relieve a little stress, he was the equivalent of like 10 feet away, clinging to your building, listening to and potentially recording every little gasp and finger flick)

But he gets SO frustrated when you're, you know polite, but, not exactly as receptive as he's hoped? When in reality he's still being awkward as fuck and you're still kind of adjusting to him paying attention to you, and it probably feels good to have him seemingly recognizing your efforts but like, you don't wanna. date him??? At least not so suddenly or anything, so he's trying to court you, but, it's becoming harder and harder to be around you at all, let alone when your heats start coming up. He could never tell before that your scent starts changing when That Time is coming around, gradually shifting and becoming something he finds differently hypnotic, something that makes him want to bury his nose in your neck while also, being buried in you period

He'll grow the balls to be more direct with you eventually, but he justifies everything by telling himself he just wants to get to know more about you, and that the stalking is just him trying to get to know you a little more, so when he sees you face to face he can win you over and make you his mate treat you better, obviously! He'll... he'll ask you out to dinner next week, he promises! But for now, he's just gonna, stay right here perched under your window, seeing and hearing and smelling everything

[samcarpentersgirlfriend]

Could you do a Liv McKenzie x fem reader

where reader is really into scary movies and finally convinces Liv to watch one with her but then like halfway through it freaks Liv out a bunch and then reader comforts her because she’s cared and they kiss or sm?

ofc!! thank you for requesting liv, she’s so underrated and I love her sm <3 it’s honestly criminal that there’s barely anything written for her tbh

I realised when reading over this that it might not be exactly what you wanted, but if it’s a problem feel to re-request or send me a message and I can always try and rewrite it :)

MOVIE NIGHT || LIV MCKENZIE X READER 𖤐₊˚.

summary: above

word count: 971

warnings: swearing, descriptions of gore (nothing too graphic)

⨯ . ⁺ ✦ ⊹ ꙳ ⁺ ‧ ⨯. ⁺ ✦ ⊹ . * ꙳ ✦ ⊹

“Shit!”

You can’t help but giggle as Liv just about jumps out of her skin again, almost spilling the contents of her popcorn bowl all over the pair of you.

“Do we have to watch this?” She whines. “It’s disgusting! I mean look!” She winces and gestures to the screen. “Do we really need to see her insides like that?”

“Probably not.” You agree with a shrug. “But it makes for good entertainment.”

“Good entertainment? God, you’re so weird.” Liv replies, grimacing. She’d never understood your fascination with horror movies, just as you’d never understood why she couldn’t get into them despite how obviously fake they were.

It must’ve just been another example of something that just worked about the two of you, your different nature making you all the more compatible with each other. You found that you tended to gravitate towards Liv compared to your other friends - she was just easy to be around. You’d never understood why Mindy would claim that she was the “boring one”, because frankly? You’d rather hang out with Liv than any of the rest of them. She was fun and easy to talk to, and your scheduled movie nights had quickly become the most anticipated nights of your week.

“Hey, come on!” you exclaim, launching a piece of popcorn at her head. “You picked the movie last week!”

“Yeah, and we watched Tangled! A very non - scary movie! Come on, you know I don’t do horror - why did I let you talk me into this again?”

“Because,” you say, reaching over to muss up her pink hair. “you love me too much. Now just watch it Liv. You never know, you might actually enjoy it.”

She simply mutters something inaudible under her breath, sinking further into her spot on the couch. She stays silent for around another ten minutes until woman on screen floats into the air gracefully as her family looks on in horror, the music reaching its crescendo as her limbs snap in all directions and blood pours from her eyes. Her screams echo throughout the room whilst Liv gags dramatically and buries her head in your shoulder, her pretty pink hair falling over her face.

“You alright?” You ask her.

“Totally.” She says with her voice muffled, giving you a shaky thumbs up. “I’m totally cool.”

“You’re not gonna throw up on me, are you?”

“Definitely not,” she replies.

A second passes.

“Probably not.”

You pull away on instinct, almost feeling bad when Liv about falls onto the sofa without your support. “Liv, you know it’s all totally fake, right?”

“I know,” she answers with a pout. “That doesn’t mean it isn’t freaky as shit though. It’ll be in my nightmares for weeks!”

Your gaze softens as you scoot closer to Liv, your legs becoming messily intertwined as you do so.

“I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have made you watch it,” you sigh.

“No, it’s okay. You love this movie, so-“

“Yeah, but I love you more,” you interject. You say it gently, but there’s no undeniable force behind it. Because you mean it. Liv meant more to you than she would ever know, and definitely more than some stupid movie. She had to understand that, surely?

“You do?” She replies quietly, a small smile playing on her lips.

You clasp her hands in yours. “Yeah, I do. And don’t you forget that.”

Liv simply looks at you with bright eyes, her expression unreadable even to you. You realise how close of you the two of you have become on the couch and you look away from her for a moment, your tongue running over your suddenly dry lips before you continue.

“Try to take your mind off of the movie. Come on, think of happy things. Puppies, rainbows, whatever it is that floats your boat. You got something?”

Liv pauses for a minute in thought before nodding slowly.

“Yeah, actually. I do.”

“Great. What is it?” You smile.

“It’s nothing”, she says almost wistfully, her gaze avoiding yours.

“Aw, come on Liv. You know I’m not gonna judge you!” She couldn’t have possibly thought of something that bad, and you couldn’t think of an instance where the two of you ha kept secrets from each other.

You see the moment when Liv gives in, a nervous, sheepish smile tugging on the corners of her mouth. It’s then that she leans forward and he brings her lips to your ears, her hot breathe against your skin making you shiver.

“Well then,” she murmurs, voice low. “I guess it’s just easier if I show you.”

And then she’s pressing her lips to yours, and your breath catches for a brief moment. Because your best friend is kissing you, properly kissing you, hesitant and delicate and somehow completely perfect all at once. And it shouldn’t feel this right. But it does, and once you regain your composure you’re returning the kiss, your hands instinctively reaching for Liv’s neck. She becomes more confident with that, the kiss turning ever-so slightly more heated, her mouth more willing to explore yours.

You can’t help but wonder why you haven’t been doing this forever.

After what feels like an eternity, you pull back for air and can barely suppress your grin when Liv sighs quietly to herself.

“You were right,” you breathe out, “that was much easier.”

Liv just laughs that beautiful laugh of hers, her brilliant blue eyes lighting up brighter than you’ve ever seen them before.

“So,” she speaks finally, “Do you wanna watch another movie?” She picks up the remote to scroll through the options but you push it back down, causing her to look up to meet your own intense gaze.

“Not really,” you murmur, leaning closer to her once more. “I think I’d rather just kiss you again.”

And Liv is more than happy to oblige.

[wenevergotusedtoegypt]

I am...pretty upset at our babysitter.

When we hired her back in the fall, she quoted a range for her hourly rate, of which the lowest end was tbh significantly higher than the going rate around here. But, she was actually available for all the hours we needed (which we struggled to find), she had glowing references, and she gave off a good vibe. So I had an honest conversation with her where I explained that we really wanted to hire her, but we're a single income family and, while it's not on her to accept a lower wage to accommodate that fact, we couldn't do more than the low end of her range (and that, though I didn't tell her, only with some financial help from my in-laws). She agreed to that rate and told us that she would always be transparent with us if money was becoming an issue, and might potentially take on an additional job if she needed to, though she hoped to work for just us.

So fast forward a few months. She's great with the kids, they love her, she's very reliable. She's asked about our childcare needs over the summer, so it seems she anticipates continuing to work for us over the longterm if we'll have her. Everything is going great.

Then we hit my husband's winter break, which was over a month long and started right before Chanukah. She asked if we needed her over Chanukah because she wanted to visit family, and we said no due to my husband being on break. She then asked about the rest of the break. I told her that technically we didn't need her, BUT I knew she was relying on the money, so we were happy to have her continue working throughout the break or for part of it, and it was totally up to her. She declined to work at all over the break.

First day back after the break and she asked if she could speak to me before she left. She told me that after the month of not working, she was struggling financially, and had had to borrow money. Here I began to expect she was going to ask for a raise. I told her that I was so sorry, because maybe I hadn't been clear, but I'd really meant it when I'd said that we would've been happy to have her keep working over the break. She said that it wasn't my fault, but now that her class schedule is fully in the evening (she's a part time student, and in the fall it was part evening and part afternoon), she realized she needs to work more of a full time schedule during the day in order to make enough to get by. And that therefore, she was giving her 2 weeks, because she was going to look for another job.

So I get she needs money. She only works for us 10-11ish hours a week. I had kind of assumed til now that her parents were paying some of her expenses.

But like.

How did you not realize in the fall that this wouldn't be enough money? Why did it take a month of not working to figure that out? Would/when would this realization even have hit if my husband hadn't had a break?

WHY DID YOU NOT WORK FOR A MONTH WHEN WE LITERALLY TOLD YOU WE WOULD PAY YOU IF MONEY WAS SUCH A CONCERN

It's not actually her 2 weeks. Because she literally had not even applied to a single job as of that conversations, because

She waited to start doing so until she could talk to us?? Like I feel like she thought she was doing the right thing by speaking in person, but...we could have had maybe even WEEKS extra time to figure something out?? Or she could've started applying when my husband was on break so if she left it wouldn't be an immediate crisis.....

So the "2 weeks" is really more "I reserve the right to be done as of 2 weeks from now but if I don't find a job by then I'll stay til an unspecified point." Which is EXTREMELY unhelpful because how am I supposed to hire someone without a definite start date. IF I'm going to hire someone, that is, because....

I asked her if she would be interested if I could help her find another family nearby that needed babysitting earlier in the day. Prior to this offer, she had told me that she really really didn't want to stop working for us, she loves our family, etc. so I thought this would be a great solution all around (as another issue she mentioned was the commute and whether it was worth it for only a couple hours of work at a time). She seemed genuinely interested in the prospect, so as soon as she left, I put out feelers to a bunch of local groups. I had like 16 people, maybe more, contact me about her and I connected her with all of them. I was feeling like maaaaybe things would work out, as long as she could find someone else who would accept her rate (or maybe she'd go down if it was more hours). Either way I couldn't try to find someone else because maybe I wasn't even going to hire anyone.

After a couple of days 2 of those people reached out to me asking if I knew what was up, because they had reached out, and she had never replied. So I was going to ask her what the deal was today, because wth, girl, I'm trying to find you a job and you're not even responding to would-be employers. But before I even got the chance, she told me that she was "offered a job" at a place that lines up well with her intended field, and she has an interview on Wednesday, so she'll let me know what's happening - but good news, it would probably start about a week later than she thought! I was like wait, you have a job offer or you have an interview?

It's just an interview. It's just a first interview. I almost have to admire the level of confidence entailed in being that sure you're going to land the job that you're already making plans around it, but anyway. What good does it do for me to know that you have an interview and you think there's a really good chance you'd get the job and that if you did you would probably start by X date? I still can't actually plan anything.

And, I'm also frustrated because I feel like if she was going to accept my offer to help her find another babysitting job nearby, she owed it to me to make a good faith effort to look into whether anything I found would meet her needs, and meanwhile she didn't even reply to all the interested parties I found her. If she wasn't going to take that option seriously, she should've just told me it wasn't something she was interested in. I feel misled by how enthusiastically she declared that she wanted to keep working for us and then it feels like she didn't really even try to make that happen.

Anyway, bottom line, she's put us in an extremely difficult spot. Assuming she does leave, any gap between that departure and finding a suitable new sitter will entail my missing hours of work a week (my husband isn't allowed to miss any of his classes and can't really miss any more days in the clinic than what he'll miss for yontiff, because he has to make up each day he misses). She is a really good sitter and I think she has had genuinely good intentions this whole time. But she is just like. Woefully naive about finances I guess? and not very tuned into what would actually be helpful to us as far as notice.

[namazunomegami]

in my opinion, Gege suffers from the same problem that Tite Kubo suffered from: rushing.

this is partly due to the nature of Weekly Shōnen Jump as well as his own health issues, but not completely.

Both Kubo and Gege have this problem in which they have a plan of how to get from point A to point B, but tend to not flesh that out.

However, a lot of the outrage I’m seeing towards the current situation in the manga comes from people who tend to be unable to seperate canon Gojo from fanon Gojo because when you put fanon at the back of your mind as just take Gojo and JJK as a whole (and not for what we wish they could be), the character’s reactions to what’s going on and what’s happening to Gojo do not really surprise me at all.

ANON I'M SO SORRY THAT I KEPT YOU WAITING FOR SO LONG!!! I got sick and spent most of my days with recovering. And now, with newfound strength, I'm ready to yap!! Hope you can forgive me for taking some time off from tumblr.

cw: minor spoilers from Bleach, especially from the new TYBW arc, endless yapping

I absolutely agree with you that Weekly Shounen Jump is Satan's bastard child. I'm not surprised that mangakas eventually choose another, yet a not as popular magazine for publishing. Shounen Jump also takes a lot of creative liberty from authors or not give them enough money, it doesn't matter how popular their work is (just look at poor Togashi, Shounen Jump has been slowly killing him). Literally the same thing happened to Araki and I think it's actually better that Jojo's has a monthly release schedule in terms of writing and pacing. As well as my goat Ishida Sui who got horribly burnt out by Tokyo Ghoul and now moved to Tonari Young Jump which is an even weirder kind of niche, I think they mostly publish horror and seinen but the magazine is a completely online platform. And Ishida now has an irregular release schedule, meaning he publishes a chapter whenever he feels like it. So... sometimes I don't hear anything from Choujin X for months and sometimes I get three chapters in a row every week. But I care about him and his art more than my own incapability to keep up with stuff.

The main problem (for me at least) with Bleach that it gets repetitive quickly. Substitute Shinigami arc? That's a good introduction arc tbh, sense of wonder is there, we're slowly building up the world, provide explanations at a nice pace. Ichigo was a one of a kind shounen protagonist in the early 2000s because he didn't want to save the whole world, he wasn't above to kill his enemies, he didn't want to be the Hokage/Pirate King/the Strongest/whatever, he just wanted to protect those who are close to him and couldn't give a shit about others and that's the reason he was so relatable to many readers. He was a delinquent, a punk compared to the usual happy-go-lucky protag formula.

Soul Society arc? Rukia is off to be executed and Ichigo rescues her with the help of the gang and gets a few power ups. Arrancar arc? Orihime is kidnapped by Aizen and Ichigo wants to rescue her with the help of the gang and gets a few power ups. Fullbringer arc? Sado gets friendly with Xcution and Ichigo's initial trust in them starts to crumble so he wants to protect him with the help of the gang and gets back his shinigami powers and also a few power ups. TYBW arc? Ishida betrays the gang and leaves with the nazis-but-dressed-in-white so he wants to save him with the help of the gang but oh shit the Soul King is killed he must save the whole world too and gets a few power ups. Great success!

I know, I know that's oversimplified but I love Bleach with all of its faults.

Rushing was definitely a problem with Kubo especially in the last arc. I'll forever be bitter about the ending (and no, not because of the ichiruki vs ichihime ship war, I couldn't care less but I admit that I'm an ichiruki and ulquihime fan and Studio Pierrot was always heavily biased in terms of ships) and because Kubo literally failed his own main cast.

I remember that I saw a post on DeviantArt where the original poster shared their thoughts about how they imagine the main four's ending and I'm almost completely on board with that. I can go for so, so long how Kubo did Ishida and Sado dirty, but maybe in another occassion, I'll get deeper into that.

Another problem with TYBW arc is that he made the Quincy ridiculously op. The fights weren't fair and some of the abilities are beyond of any logic (I'm looking at you Gerard, Yhwach and Pernida) and he needed a few asspulls to make the Shinigami win. And some of the truly powerful Shinigami couldn't get utilised. And Byakuya should have remained dead.

But at least I'm giving Kubo credits for that he's willing to correct his mistakes with the new seasons and the light novels.

Gege... Gege just completely lost it. His mind, the plot, character development, everything. He gets inspired by wonderful authors, but can't use them in a satisfying way, the execution is just bad. When you spend such a small amount of time to write your characters the fandom will do it, and that's why fanon Gojo and canon Gojo is just two different characters. But that's sorta true for all of the characters in the cast.

And some fans are just horribly delusional, sorry not sorry.

[22degreehalo]

Actually speaking of which

So, the library I'm volunteering at opened up applications for a casual library officer!!!!!

This is the same place I've been helping out for like?? Two years??? More????? at this point???? But last year when I applied they didn't even give me an interview. Like I was literally doing almost the exact same thing I would be doing if I worked there, and I hadn't had any complaints, but they wouldn't even consider me.

I was REALLY bummed and considered giving up this path altogether, but thankfully I did get hired by another library, where I'm working right now!!! And I found out afterwards that another guy who was also volunteering alongside me ALSO applied for that other job where we were volunteering and ALSO didn't get considered (and now ALSO got a job at this new library, thankfully).

I talked to the librarian I'd been assisting and she was really mad on our behalf?? Said she'd heard something about how they were looking for people with retail experience specifically, which is... strange. Like, are they TRYING to run it like a business instead...?

I've still kept volunteering with them, though (albeit I quit part of what I was doing because the schedule turned out to conflict with my new job too much; it was very sad tbh), because they need people, and it's an important role that apparently doesn't get many volunteers, and it's only two hours every other week, and it's still my local council so. It's the most convenient to get to and all. I still hoped they might reconsider hiring me.

And, as I began this all, now they've opened up applications again. So I applied.

But. I don't want to *stop* working where I am; it's genuinely a really great place and I've even become a bit attached to the other people there!! (not something that happens easily hahaha)

Apparently it's normal to have multiple casual library jobs at the same time. So that's been my goal for a while.

But... could I really do that? I'm already not the most organised just with my one job... I know it's normal, but I am neurodivergent... I need to remember that that is a true thing about myself that I can state as a fact...

I don't know. Obviously I could just keep working at this current place until I can get a permanent position somewhere... Though I still don't really feel qualified to do any of it... ugh.

Is it really okay if things just stay as they are...? I've said before that this is an okay minimum, or something like that. I don't *desperately need* to change anything. But is it okay not to even especially try...?

I could go back to TAFE... but part of me thinks that I should go back to uni instead and study cataloguing, because that'd definitely help me get a position, and I'd love to have a part in shaping the non-fiction sections specifically... (god, just walking through the non-fiction shelves is soooo refreshing to the soul <33) But that'd be really expensive, and I already have two degrees I'm basically not doing anything with...

Ugh. Again it feels like giving up on the goal of moving out. But there are already a lot of question marks around that.

Welp. They might not want to hire me anyway. If that happens, I might just finally give up on the volunteering... or at least consider volunteering somewhere else. My library hires people to do the thing I'm volunteering for there (in fact, *I* am one of the people paid to do the thing I'm doing as volunteer at my local library!!); they should consider that, too, if they can't find anyone after me.

idk sorry this is such a long post. I'm not sure how to feel about it all right now...

[gon-and-killuas-mother]

i am attempting "light therapy" to help fix my sleep schedule and i'm cranky about it

my aunt, who's a neuropsychiatrist (one of the few women in her field and fairly well known at this point, don't know if anyone's heard of Dr. Jo Cara Pendergrass but damn she's cool) was in town this week to look after her mom post-cataract surgery

Cara is probably the smartest person in the family, all things considered

(my brother and I give her a run for her money but neither of us intend on getting a goddamn PhD lol) (also my dad wouldn't appreciate me saying that, he is also pretty smart. but like. he's got intelligence, he's just lacking in wisdom)

ANYWAY. of all the people in the family, Cara is the person i rarely have to explain my illnesses to. usually, i have to tack on a brief description of it anytime i say "yeah i have EDS and fibromyalgia and IBS and--"

but last time i saw her over Christmas, i told her the diagnosis and had my script prepared to explain, but she just went "Oh yeah Ehlers Danlos -- wait. Oh."

her face did the thing where she was processing new info at light speed by blinking and cycling through several expressions as the pieces of the mystery that is my chronic ailments settled themselves in place

unfortunately i wasn't at the point where i was comfortable enough to tell anyone how miserable and in pain i was, that was something i put off another couple of months before i confessed to Nana that i'd become a grocery thief and was on my way to being homeless. that's also around when my brother asked my permission to share my story with the family, because he knows how difficult it is for me to admit how much i'm struggling.

i'm rambling tbh but only to keep me awake and sitting outside long enough

ANYWAY

so Cara was here this week. i went to visit the other night. we always have really interesting conversations about our brains and genes and family shite, i don't think anyone other than my brother and i can actually hold a conversation with her about that kind of shit.

i did NOT go there just for advice, but when i told her how much trouble i've had getting out of bed before evening, she gave me a couple of tips that i'm now trying out

1). the 24-hour sleep deprivation strategy

it sounds like a nightmare to me, but apparently has supporting evidence that, at least in the short term, resets your circadian rhythm.

if you've ended up awake hours past your desired bedtime, then instead of simply going to bed late, it's advised* to keep yourself awake throughout the rest of the day until the next bedtime.

( * WITH CONSULTATION OR SUPERVISION OF A DOCTOR)

the reason this is supposedly effective is that the longer you stay awake, the higher the sleep pressure becomes (sleep pressure is just your body's signal to go the fuck to bed, which is something i'm intimately familiar with as it's a constant companion of mine regardless of sleep hygiene). the higher the sleep pressure the easier it is to fall asleep and, ideally, the better your sleep becomes.

Cara did emphasize that as far as we know, it's only a short term strategy. either we haven't done enough studies or we haven't figured out how to apply it to a longer term solution.

2). Light therapy

i was already somewhat aware of this but not to the extent that Cara explained.

the trick here is to force yourself out of bed (if you're able) and sit outside. preferably on sunny days. she said this even works if you end up falling asleep outside anyway, you're still absorbing sunlight.

there's no immediate change, as it does take a few days or more to notice any improvements (this checks out, as i am still drowsy as fuck) but doing this daily or semi-daily gradually convinces the body and brain to be awake earlier.

it's one of those things that a lot of disabled folk like me, especially those with fucked up sleep, would hear and get annoyed with, because we've tried so many different strategies that have each failed one way or another. and hearing "go outside" just reminds me of my mother and every yoga enthusiast insisting on all natural medicine, which understandably raises my metaphorical hackles.

but Cara, again, is the smartest person i know. i'm much more willing to take the advice of a neuropsychiatrist over a yoga mom, despite them actually agreeing on something.

and also? i do miss the Sun, quite terribly.

so if, by sometime next week, i'm magically able to wake up earlier with less struggle, i will let y'all know. i'm gonna be cranky about it, especially if it actually WORKS, but as the neighborhood mascot of Sleep Deprivation i think i'm a pretty good indicator if something like this is legit or not.

｡⁠:ﾟ⁠(⁠;⁠´⁠∩⁠`⁠;⁠)ﾟ⁠:⁠｡

[kaija-rayne-author]

I finished Baldur's Gate 3 and immediately started another playthrough. Modded this time.

My polyam mod is definitely working and I'm apparently incapable of disappointing Karlach. So I guess I have a 5 way vs a 4. I was gonna Romance just the chaotic and evil leaning characters this go round.

Why do I have a feeling she's gonna end up hating this durge character of mine cause they're non-resistant? So, uh, probably gonna get my heart broken.

I've also been lovingly blessed with the flu because some selfish assholes seem to think giving immunocompromised people viruses is a great gift. /s (There are millions of immunocompromised people since covid, and even depression or anxiety makes you immunocompromised. I'm not a rare bird in that sense. If you're old or pregnant you're also immunocompromised. Surprise!)

I've been morbidly sick for 9 days and while it's slowly easing off, it's average that it takes me 6 weeks to fully kick influenza.

And our vaccinations were scheduled for this week. Because only older folks could get them before then.

I've watched Vox Machina during the days I could basically just stare at something, and gods, I really love it. Looking forward to the next season.

Hollyweird is finally figuring out D&D! It only took them, what, 30 plus years and gods know how many awful attempts at shows and movies?

Anyone know of anything else like it? I've seen the d&d movie, uh, 3x, and loved that too. (Yes, I'm aware of what critical role is, I have absolutely zero interest in watching them. Books, games, movies/shows, those I can enjoy, but watching someone else I don't know play a game I could be playing doesn't work for me.)

Anyway, sorry for the radio silence. I was sewing like a fiend for eldest's costume for Halloween. Partner has had both a major back surgery and a major mouth surgery just before getting sick. Then the kids and I got sick. The coughing is totally doing a great thing for partner's staples.

Yes, we asked the doc for tamiflu. No she didn't give it to us. And her secretary was a snarky ass about it. As if I ask for very much from them at all. Not impressed tbh. If I ask for something from my doc it's because I've researched it and feel it's actually necessary. I was pre-med ffs, and have medical adjacent degrees. I'm far from the regular person when it comes to things like that.

Uuuugh. Why can't people do others the simple gods damned courtesy of masking?

During the year most everyone was masking, everyone was healthier. Flu numbers were lower than they ever had been, cold viruses were low too. Why the fuck would anyone want to not mask after that example?

I'm historically sensitive to influenza for some reason. It takes me down hard and keeps me down for weeks. But even I didn't get the flu that year.

Why is knowingly getting others ill with your germs even remotely socially acceptable? Why?

Oh, right, 'muh feelings'. I have a panic attack every time I mask, and I still mask religiously every time I leave the house. I'm still always freaking sick because of other people's selfishness.

As a historian, I'll just say that this period of history will be judged incredibly harshly.

[propalitetz]

what is going on in your PtH game?

hi sorry for taking a fucking century to get back to you, first i made my friends post some art and then i forgor

it's not my game its my friends game! im just obsessed with it.

also [HEY] everyone [LOOK] at [THE COOL ART] my friends have [DRAWN] for [THIS] game!! <- links to cool art

it takes place in this really prestigious university that's dubbed the 'crucible academy', and its about a band of students coming together as a team and having to like, learn to work together while horrible shit keeps happening around them

essentially, they have to seek out the shackles binding the grim majesties, to imbue them with light once again so that those queens remained sealed away! gotta delve deep in dens of darkness to find them. so far uhh no luck yet - so far it's still in it's 'setting up the main plot' stage, so interpersonal drama has taken the lead

mostly about how one of the player characters, kiandra, has a destiny intertvwined with a much more volatile and dangerous older magi-girl - the destiny says that they're gonna kill each other no matter what, and that theyve done this in their previous reincarnations. which is i mean enough to freak anyone out tbh kiandras goin thru it she tried to reach out to the other girl and its exploded

so far we got hana who is a weeb failgirl thats mostly unstable and not managing her social awkwardness at all, she's got a piece of her past life stuck in her brain and the much more ruthless, experienced magi-girl can take over when transformed so theres tension there

so my love plays kasimir , a polish exchange student severely into HEMA and music (in that universe hema is a big deal and he's on a sword scholarship) and he's like got this whole thing where he sees himself as a knight and a sacrifice and there to take any blows we love that (it's unhealthy) (an endless line of dead bodies in an endless line of wars!!). (he's got his shit together the most its tragic) hes my lil blorboman i love him soooooo much he'll charge at a bunch of scary monsters without blinking but play his music in front of other people??? NOT POSSIBLE

gwen is a babydoll who im also obsessed with shes like a super-rich girlie with HER OWN BUTLER who isn't light touched but they are like, sworn in on all that light shit, theyre a levelheaded person to contrast with gwen's bubbly girliepoppery. she has hidden depths though its kind of terrifying how she can switch from hiiiiiii omg hiiii into like raised-as-a-business mode. she EMAILS her PARENTS to schedule CONVERSATIONS????

speaking of emailing their parents to schedule conversations we have constantine who is another exchange student (greek, and old money loaded) who loves to plan his schedule weeks in advance in a terrifying efficiency that neglects to actually give him like, time to chill or relax. he's an introverted SNIPER MAN and hes a relatively new addition so im excited to see more of his particular brand of insane

and then we have mark who is also a late addition and hes full of secrets. i know the secrets bc im friends with his player but i forget how much is knowledge to the rest of the party (who follow me on tumblr) rn! so lets just say hes a silly goofy boy and fate will NOT let him be silly or goofy :')

[miscelunaaa]

I know you’re less active on here nowadays but I hope you’re doing well, esp since I think I saw you mention at some point you were in the middle of a very busy holiday season while getting back to a more regular work schedule, among other things. While I’m always looking forward to Large Joon Fic updates (seriously, my favorite name for it, even though Sacrificial is also lovely and becoming even more meaningful as the story wraps up), I hope you’re taking care of yourself, doing whatever makes you happy in the meantime and finding a better balance of all the things.

IT WILL ALWAYS BE LARGE JOON FIC IN OUR HEARTSSSSS

Ah, my goodness. I've been thinking about this a lot lately. When I'd started posting it, my goal was to have it done posting before the end of the year, and yet, here we are, in 2023, and I still have four chapters to go. Shit happens, to be honest.

When I started doing freelance editing, I had multiple existential crises because for months, I couldn't get anyone to take a chance on me. And like, y'all know how much I beta read. It's something I'm confident in doing. But know one wants to hire a person with zero paid experience. And then suddenly, a person did. And then another, and another, and suddenly I have a handful of repeat clients who not only like how I do my job but actually give a shit and pay me for my opinions on writing. Like what the fuck right?? I'm still in shock tbh.

I started posting Sacrificial around the same time I started looking for work, so watching these two parts of my life work together in tandem like this has been really strange, but also like, so important. Even when I'm like swamped in deadlines (like I am this week), getting a comment on Sacrificial, or any other fic, for that matter, reminds me that I can only do what I'm doing right now because of what this community has given me. And that shit started with me drafting Sacrificial in 2021.

idk I've been thinking about it a lot, mostly because fuuuuuck I need to get ch 17 out soon because I'm anxious to hear people's thoughts on what happens during it. I'm just so bad at managing my time alksjdhflaksjdh

BUT. I'm learning!! I'm so so thankful that I've got folks like you, who are patient and gracious about my slowness. Truly, it means the world to me. I know I'm a broken record about that shit but like I don't feel like I can say it enough tbh. This community, for all the times that it makes me want to rip my hair out, is made infinitely richer by having folks like you in it :) folks like you are why I'm still here at all.

Anyway that's enough feelings for a Friday. I appreciate you so much, Sim!!!!!! Thank you so much for writing in! I'm figuring my shit out slowly, and I'm so thankful for you <3

[capriciouscaprine]

happy new month to everyone!!!

I have SO MUCH to do for my coursework, but I wanted to take the time to write a post about what I'm up to currently, what this month holds for me, and what my goals are for the future as we all head towards summer

currently, I just hit a goal # this morning, although it didn't feel all that impactful, and I'm pretty sure that's bc I both didn't get enough sleep last night and bc I don't have any rewards set up for myself besides the emotional reward of hitting that goal; obviously, I need to be consistent about getting enough sleep and have rewards ready for myself, but both of these are uniquely tricky right now bc I have an absurd sleep schedule (6 pm-2 am), no time, and even less money

I'm coming out of a six week full time unpaid internship, so my hours were drastically cut at my actual job; instead of five days, I was down to just two, and they were the two days the least amount of work and thus fewest available hours to get paid; I got a boost from cat sitting for my neighbor, whose cat needs careful monitoring and specific medicine on a pretty strict schedule, but this pay cut was on top of paying tuition for the semester, so I currently have negative money aka am carrying a balance on my credit card, to the tune of $3.5k (oof)

the good news is that with spring pollen comes increased hours, as my job is on a farm with both plants and animals; we've got seedlings to water and plant, babies to feed, and field trips to prep for and manage, so I've jumped from 3-4 hour days to 5-6 hour days, five days a week; I get paid pretty okay ($16/hr after taxes), but I still typically get less than 30 hours a week, so my monthly pay is only around $1.5k (rounding down for safety, especially since this a very recent jump)

looking forward to things happening this month, I have my final paper for my most important class of my entire masters degree, due WITH a presentation and handout on April 10th, and then two weeks later (less than or exactly 14 days, iirc) I must give a comprehensive presentation (and possibly turn in some other stuff??) about myself, my internship, my previously mentioned final paper, and a problem from our final exam, which will determine if I get my degree or not

oh, and I need to plan and record another internship observation, which I had been under the impression that I wouldn't need to do, which is due by the 15th, right in between all of these other things being due

I am under immense pressure right now, and it's definitely having a negative impact on my mental health; I'm managing not to burst into tears constantly or run away to the woods (a very short distance for me, so particularly tempting) thanks to both succeeding at other goals and knowing that their are specific dates for all of this to be over by; all I have to do is turn everything in on time (even if it sucks), and I'll be done with this degree by the end of this month and officially graduate in early May (ugh, need to order and pay for my cap and gown this week (~$200))

heading into next month, after everything is turned in (seems impossible to imagine, tbh, which is why I'm writing this post), I'll be free to PLAN and SET GOALS

(I'm so excited!!!)

like I said before, my pay isn't high and I've got debt I need to address on top of more bills coming in the future (six months of car insurance D: ), but I have to believe that I can get everything paid for and still have enough money to have a tiny bit of fun, too; I need to still down and draw up a budget, ESPECIALLY for food since I'm going to finally have time to make more things for myself!!! which will absolutely be cheaper than all the pre-made and pre-portioned meals and snacks I've been buying

the last time I had a big goal, I had a bar and a line graph to track my savings (my house down payment! ty 2018 mini recession, you made home ownership possible); now it'll be the double whammy of 'saving' for bills and paying down the old debt, plus I'm genuinely at the point of needing a new phone WITH a case, and all the actually functional phones with enough storage space, etc run just under $350, so with accessories that could be $500 aka NOT an impulse purchase!

otherwise, my big goal is to clean up my house: it has been TRASHED by consecutive roommates, but particularly by the most recent one; I have bits of stuff taking up space from everyone who's moved in and then out again over the past 5+ years, but the last one (who I made a whole rant post about) was so filthy when it came to using the kitchen that they left me an infestation of MULTIPLE types of insects, some of which I've never even seen before!!!

here in the southern US, we already deal with some insect trouble bc it doesn't get cold enough to fully kill them off, plus they can always be brought into a clean house from our great outdoors, which we have lots of; it isn't unusual for even the shiniest of mansions to get a roach sneaking into a bathroom or a line of ants running into the kitchen

in comparison, my house is genuinely disgusting, and I haven't been able to DO anything about it since classes and thus deadlines started back in August; the good news is this project won't take, relatively, that much money, and I even have a pretty good idea of what all I need to do to almost completely fix this! the only real problem is that it'll take a fair bit of physical labor and thus energy, which I don't always have a lot of, so I'll need to be strategic and get things done in phases and also not give up!

there are a lot of expensive things that have gone wrong and need fixing around the house, and there are even more expensive changes I want to make; I need to remind myself that all of these will happen in time, and I need to not obsess over them or let them demotivate me as I'm working towards addressing the issues that I can

in the far-flung future (it feels like), getting my degree means I am qualified for teaching jobs!!! math and teachers in general are in pretty high demand in my area (where aren't they right now?), and the pay is relatively high, as in double the highest I've ever made before in my entire life; once I've got my degree, I can dedicate myself to getting one of those jobs at a nearby school, and at that point, once I start getting those paychecks (fingers crossed), a whole new world will open up for me!!!

[tenrose]

I feel like I'm being two different persons at the same time... Like I'm ok with my alone life at home, it's far from being perfect but I'm being more indulgent to myself than before. Like the crushing guilt of having done nothing of the whole weekend isn't as heavy as before, because I know I am exhausted from work 200% of the time so I won't do anything of my Saturdays unless someone else planned something for me and I'm being more gentle with me cause I know I need to rest, I'm literally always close to have a mental breakdown. Just feeling guilty cause laying in bed doesn't help my back to heal. But I've learnt to live with this constant disturbance in my leg. Lately I've been watching shows, old shows but hey that count as doing something. And actually it keeps me from respecting a good eating schedule so I can have time to watch an episode before going to sleep so it's a win. Haven't had time to finish the deep cleaning, so my apartment still looks like a mess, but however since we have deep cleaned the kitchen I'm able to maintain this part clean and tidy so I have faith in me. I just need help for the big cleaning but then I think I will finally be able to maintain my apartment clean (excluding the fact that I have a cat dudjsjz), and we might do the bathroom next week (both me and my aunt helping just have been too busy to have time). I take care of my health. And also I'm reading. Not as fast as I was, not as regularly as I would like too but I'm reading. And I can feel the positive impact it has on my brain. Also I listen to SFF related podcasts at work and it genuinely give my brain good food. I even wrote some idea in a draft sheet for the first time in a long time. I have the creative part of my brain constantly working in the background. Don't think it would lead me anywhere to write, but I just love so much to have new ideas flooding through my brain.

But then, on the other side, there's like I said, the constant edge of having a mental breakdown. And it's all because of one thing: work. Luckily I'm good with my colleagues (although we're only that and I still have not friends in the neighborhood), and we are all like this close to the breaking point. Some have been absent for a while so I suspect them to have had the mental breakdown in question. But yeah, we work early, with a lot of extra hours, and they always ask for more and although we're in our rights to refuse it's still mentally draining. Not to mention that instead of simply suppressing our productivity bonus and telling it us like that, they just recalculated the whole thing so it's basically unreachable and it makes it looks like it's our fault if we don't get it. Anyway basically everyone is pissed off, not to mention we don't even know if our client is gonna stay anyway... So yeah work basically fuck everything up. I mean I've always been running on low energy so it's not the only excuse for my numbness but honestly working for a capitalist piece of shit company really takes all the fun in life... although our wages are minimum I'm trying not to complain a lot cause my way of living doesn't cost me that much (no cars, no friends to meet in a restaurant, too exhausted to go shopping etc.) so I'm fine with my finances and can go the fuck out somewhere else during my vacations. But... I have to go back... and yes basically I want to live. And even though I do have the finances to survive months without a job, my past broke family trauma does not allow me to think like that. I could never quit without having another secure job after. But the problem is that I'm way too exhausted to look for one. And also tbh I don't even know what to do with my life... truth to be told I don't want to work. Submitting to capitalism fucking suck. I'm thinking more and more about try some civil service exam, because if I get a position it would be secure. I'm not even doing it for money anyway (but like a few more days off maybe lmao). But yeah it's an exam. So it means I'd have to work on it to have a chance to succeed and tell me folk when am I supposed to find the energy to work on anything after a 40+ hours week of work????? So basically I can never talk about that with anyone, cause my colleagues are either on the same page and the other people just think saying "well look elsewhere there's plenty of opportunities" helps someone with severe anxiety and lack of confidence like me. Also speaking with people... basically every workplace is like that anyway... there's literally no escape from capitalism. Anyway still not trying anything else is totally my fault and I know it and I don't know what to do...

So yes I have to slice my brain in two different parts otherwise I would totally break apart. Thank god escapism is back in a more healthy way in my mind (I still spend way too much time mindlessly scrolling but it's better than before I'm telling you).

[sungbeam]

XNONIE PRESENT (FINALLY) !!!

hi beam! college has been kicking my butt recently ☹️ idk how ppl do it but i'm dragging myself through the week right now LMAO

i don't see anything 😀 when i search up my asks 😀 so i unfortunately 😀 have a very vague 😀 idea of our last convo 😀

but i DO remember that you asked about dc!! i'm glad u asked b/c i'm actually trying to get into dc right now! i'm watching titans season 1 on hbo max, recently watched black adam, saw ww84, & saw the new batman movie a while ago! beast boy is kinda 😍💖💕💗💞 in titans HEHEHE- my favorite dc characters rn are him & starfire but i really wanna delve into the franchise more!! who are ur dc biases so far 🙏 (yes we'll be using kpop terminology for non-kpop fandoms from now on)

also i have NOT listened to 28 reasons by seulgi yet b/c of my schedule i feel like such a fake reveluv but i'm looking into that 😭 AND YES GIVE CRAVITY SOME LOVE ON PARTY ROCK <3 i'm taeyoung biased ever since i saw his tiktoks (all their tiktoks are iconic tbh they keep up w/ trends LOL)

HOW HAVE U BEEN BTW?? and are u excited for wakanda forever? i can't believe its coming so soon alreadyyyy ��❗️

XNONIE !!! BFF !!! I'M SO SORRY FOR MY LATE REPLY I'VE JUST LACKED SO MUCH ENERGY TO EVEN REPLY TO ASKS THIS WEEK (´Д⊂ヽ but i was so excited to see u active and alive akcnekfnek idk how people do it either tbh :') like i felt that so hard when u said ur practically dragging urself thru the week like me too dude, me too 😔 LMAO SOMETHING IS UP W TUMBLR TAGS 🗿🗿🗿 as there always is tbh, but i went thru and found my latest response so i'll link it here BAHHAHA

AHHHH DC YESYES !!! i actually haven't watched the live action titans series yet :0 but i follow ryan potter on instagram so i've def seen some stuff for it !! he's so hot tho so true 😩😩😩 i kinda wish he was casted as nightwing/dick grayson cuz he would've made a really good one, but the current one i think fits as well :') ahh yes i actually am not the greatest fan of dc movies lmao just cuz their animated tv shows r just top notch and so much better imo but i did enjoy the first wonder woman and robert pattinson's the batman !! ooh my dc biases? it's prob the bat boys AHAHAHHA i'm writing an au inspired by them actually rn hehe so basically nightwing/dick grayson, red hood/jason todd, and red robin/tim drake, but i am also particularly fond of roy harper/speedy and robin/damian wayne @_@ they all make my mind go brrrr (wbu tho 👀👀)

AHHHHH WAKANDA FOREVER I HAVENT WATCHED IT YET I FEEL SO SAD ☹️☹️☹️ it's cuz college has also been kicking my ass and watching marvel movies is a thing my family does together and it's just not the same going to see it in theaters w anyone else :( so i've been holding back skcnekfn have u seen it tho :0 i'm also so very excited for quantumania !!! (ﾉ´∀｀*) IT LOOKS SO SO SO GOOD SKFNKENFKD I LOVE PAUL RUDD PLS GIVE THAT MAN AN OSCAR RN

okok i think i also was gonna bring up the fact that i wanted to write another mcu au for svt?? like ik we were talking abt the xmen au, but i was thinking abt making minghao scarlet witch and basically yn is like the one person who truly saw him and when he lost u, all hell broke loose (like in wandavision), and so it's like him recreating a life w u while his friends on the outside r trying to break him out of it before the stinky government folks do skcnwidn

[inkofamethyst]

October 27, 2022

AHA I HAVE DONE IT I HAVE CRAFTED A SCHEDULE THAT IS SO GOOD

I’ve spent the past week trying to find a class that fits nicely into my schedule to give me that sweet sweet 12-13 credits without a Friday meeting and I found one and from previous grade data 80% of people get an A and everyone loves the prof.  This is good because the other two academic classes I’m doing next semester will not be easy per se and all three are on the same day (I should have learned my lesson from this semester but three classes is better than four), but having a (supposedly) chill morning class will be nice.  ~So~ I’ve got a Monday discussion, three TuTh classes where I’m in after breakfast and out for a late lunch, and that’s it.  I mean I’m also TAing for credit and doing research for credit, so even though I’ll technically have WF “off,” I’ll (probably) use that time to do other things (and to chill.  lots of chilling.).

The one I found is a class about how people learn which I think will be useful to know as a TA and a possible future teacher/professor/museum educator.  I know I was thinking about a choir class, but those require way too much time for a single credit.  I was considering a 2-credit dance class, but I think I have to reconcile with the fact that I’m just not a dancer, and something like that could be really frustrating for me if I couldn’t “get it” while all of the dance majors had no problem.  One of these days I will learn to dance.  A while ago I also considered taking a bioanth class through the consortium, but I’m tired, so.. no.  Like if I was going straight into a job or something then maybe, but I’m going to spend the next 5-7 years learning, hopefully in a department with plenty of bioanth classes, and I think I deserve a bit of downtime.  I also considered TAing for a straight up bio class, but nah.  I’m content with what I’ve cooked up.  Registration in a little under a week, let’s goooooo!

On another note, I had another meeting, and it went really well, so something about Monday’s was just off.  Am I gonna waste $200 on an application for that program so I don’t burn bridges?  Eh, probably.  hhhhhhh.  One more to go.  Anyway, uhm, even though I’m looking at two labs at that school, I feel like my best bet for getting in would be to apply to work with the lady I just met... tbh even if I like the other guy’s lab better.  This lady is brand spankin new faculty, no grad students (lots of time for ~me~) compared to the other guy who is more established and has two students and even warned me that he may not be able to take one next year (she might be prioritized for receiving students).  Plus, collaborations are apparently huge there, so... if what I’m looking for is an acceptance above all else?  That may be the way to go.

And on a related note, tiktok has taken to showing me videos of people saying to not get a PhD.  I... don’t exactly... I can’t express in words how that makes me feel?  Disheartened, nervous, a little more determined?

Last thing: I’ve been putting off this one essay that’s due tomorrow (today) because I am tired and also feel like I could write it quickly.  The only problem is that I have two other things also due tonight because my weekly work schedule fell apart when I had two two-class-Tuesday/Thursdays in a row and deadlines were pushed back (and now they’re all converging).  Not to mention the supplemental work I’ve got to do for my research and the papers I need to find for this grant thing I need to write this weekend.  Only six more weeks.  Anyway I do think that (once I start writing) I could finish it in a maximum of three hours (I’m actually thinking closer to two, but I’ll give myself an extra hour because I always underestimate work time).  Does that mean tomorrow is going to suck for me?  Yes, yes it does!

Today I’m thankful for uh for ground ginger, actually.  While I probably put waayyy too much of it in my curry (I also overcooked my shrimp and nearly burnt my rice..), it’s probably some of the best curry I’ve made.

okay enough procrastinating I’m finally off to do my stupid homework.  senioritis ain’t a joke.

[edit: I actually went to sleep and woke up early (pro tip: doing this can work if you schedule your wakeup 1.5, 3, 4.5, or 6 hours after you fall asleep, so you hit those full REM cycles, but doing it often is no bueno para tu salud) and I’m pretty close to being done, I think]

[edit 2: finished in... three and a half hours.  it... I mean it is submitted and that’s a win but I haven’t done either of my discussion boards :/  gotta get on those]

[secretswiftymarvelfan]

Ok but now I kinda wanna see how that failed mission went (3 crying babies) hahaha. One moment they were sleeping and the next second Jake is just seeing the bomb explode. I NEED TO SEE A BIT OF OVERWHELMED DRAMATIC JAKE❤️❤️

Okay, Okay I give 😂 tbh it didn't take much convincing at all!

Three Against One - Jake Jensen

A/N: This is based on this headcanon

Summary: Jake convinces you that he can look after the triplets on his own

Word Count: 1.7k

Warnings: Fluff! Overwhelmed Dad Jake!

Dividers by @firefly-graphics

Masterlist

The last 8 weeks had been hectic to say the least. Jake wasn’t sure if he’d actually slept at all, just a zombie moving around the house from one task to another.

He wouldn’t have it any other way though, and if someone asked him he’d say the last 8 weeks had been the best in his life. Every time he looked over at you it was in pure love and adoration because you had brought his 3 favourite bundles of joy into his life.

Anya, Jacob and Miles.

He remembered the day the two of you found out you were having triplets. Emotions running high, his being excitement, yours being terror. Snapping at him when he listed off different names based on movies and TV shows.

The two of you did then land on three names that were very Jensen in nature. All of them being names of video game characters.

Now that the triplets were 8 weeks old you had managed to work out a good schedule for the three of them. So much so that Jake felt confident that he’d be able to manage to look after them all on his own while you got some well deserved R and R with your mom.

“I don’t know Jake” you sighed biting your thumb nail nervously as you looked down at the sleeping babes.

“It’ll be fine, I’ll be fine” Jake reassures you putting his hands on your shoulders “you’re just nervous because it’s the first time being away from them” he says glancing over to your mom for support.

“He’s right darling, it’ll be good for you to get out of the house for a bit, take some time for yourself to refresh” you mom smiles getting you to glance over your shoulder at her.

You take a deep breath looking back down at the sleeping trio before looking back up at Jake “promise me you’ll call if you need help” you tell him.

He lets out a small chuckle as he grins down at you “don’t ask me to make promises I can’t keep” he smirks.

“Jake” you say a tone of warning in your voice.

“Okay, okay I will I promise, but I also promise that it won’t come to that because I’m super daddy” he smirks making your snort with laughter.

“Alright super daddy” you say playfully rolling your eyes “we’ll be back later, see you soon” you smile.

“Have a great time sweetheart, I’ll see you when you get back” Jake smiles leaning down to kiss you.

“you too” you smile before heading out of the house with you mom.

Jake waved you off from the window, waiting until the car had turned the corner at the bottom of the street before stepping away. He crept over to the sleeping trio smiling down at the three of them.

“alright guys, go easy on me alright? We need to prove to momma that I can handle it” Jake whispered down to the three of them, only getting sleepy gurgles in response.

“glad we agree, baby high five” he chuckles lightly tapping each of their hands with his fingers.

As the day went on Jake felt like he was nailing this parenting thing. He’d changed all their diapers, fed them, burped them, played with them when they were awake, settled them down for naps.

He felt so confident that while they were having their afternoon nap he decided to take some time to himself. He grabbed the baby monitor and made his way down the hall to his office/den. He’d been so busy that he hadn’t had much time for the first love of his life, video games.

Looking over his wide collection he tried to decide which game he wanted to play. He couldn’t play anything that he’d get too invested in because the last thing he need to do was start shouting and accidentally waking the triplets. That instantly ruled out a lot of his games. He decided on an RPG that centred around completing quests and collecting treasure, it was nothing too intense.

He'd been playing the game for a while now, getting stuck on one particular quest that was really starting to irritate him. His frustrations boiling over when the quest failed card came up once again.

“oh for fu-“ he exclaimed before stopping himself and wincing when he realised how loud he was shouting.

He waited in silence, with hunched shoulders looking over at the baby monitor waiting for the inevitable crying. After a few moments of silence he lets out a deep sigh of relief slumping back into his chair. However just then the sounds of all three babies screaming bloody murder echoed through the baby monitor. To be honest he didn’t even need the monitor to hear them, they were screaming so loud.

He jumped up from the chair and rushed down the hall back to all of them.

“whoa, whoa, whoa guys! What’s this all about?” he asks looking down at all of them, completely lost as to which one to go to first.

“okay um are you hungry? No you can’t be I just fed you before your nap” he muttered as he picked up Miles lifting him up so he could sniff his diaper “you smell fine, what about you two” he says putting Miles back down and checking Anya’s and Jacob’s diapers, both of which were completely clean.

Jake instantly felt lost, the two obvious answers being wrong. He rubbed his forehead already starting to get a headache from the noise as he looked down at the babies. The only thing he could think was that he had accidentally woken them up and now their crying was keeping each other up.

“I know it’s all daddy’s fault he was being too noisy” Jake sighed as he picked up Anya and gently rocked her “but now your brother’s are doing that” he added looking down at the two boys.

He sighed in annoyance as he put the two boys in their rockers hoping that would calm them while he held Anya but it wasn’t working. As soon as he’d get Anya somewhat calm and go to put her down she’d start up again, and it was the same situation with Jacob and Miles. They all wanted to be held but Jake only had two arms.

How on earth was he supposed to calm them all down at the same time? If he managed to calm one the other’s would soon set it back off again. He needed back up. But he was not calling you, no you needed the day off and he didn’t to prove that he could do this.

First he tried his sister but she wouldn’t pick up at his time in crisis. Then he tried his parents but when his dad picked up all Jake could hear was the sound of his pocket. He then tried Pooch the only other parent in The Losers who thankfully picked up.

“whoa Jensen, what’s all the noise?” Pooch asked as he picked up.

“I told Y/N to have a day out with her mom and now the triplets have staged a mutiny, I need a hand man, dad to dad, fathers supporting fathers?” Jake explained.

“sorry man, I’ve got my hands full with my boy, he’s tearing up the house as we speak, I wish I could help” Pooch sighed making Jake whine in annoyance.

“no you don’t” Jake huffs.

“you’re right I don’t, it sounds like hell and I’ve done my time of that” Pooch chuckles “look just call Y/N she’ll understand”

“yeah I guess, thanks Pooch” Jake sighs in defeat.

“not a problem, stay sane man” Pooch chuckles as he hangs up.

Jake looked down at the three babies, he really didn’t want to admit defeat but he had to. Pinching the bridge of his nose he picked up his phone and dialled you. The call barely connecting before you started asking if everything was okay.

“yeah fine, I just can’t get them to settle” Jake sighed “I’m sorry I don’t want to ask you to come back but-“

“its fine, we were on our way back anyway, I’ll be there in about 15 minutes” you tell him, Jake knew you were lying though.

“I’m really sorry” Jake apologises shaking his head.

“jakey it’s fine” You tell him “see you in a minute”

Jake sighed in defeat and disappointment as he hung up the phone looking down at Anya in his arms, and the two boys in their rockers “this wasn’t the deal guys” he sighs.

Once you were home, with the help of your mom you managed to get the three babies settled and back asleep in no time at all. Your mom then left the two of you to it, passing you Jacob so you held both boy in your arms as you sat in the rocking chair.

“I’m so sorry sweetheart, I really tried, I didn’t want to spoil your days I promise” Jake apologised profusely as he held Anya.

You gave him a gentle smile as you looked back up at him “It’s fine Jakey, we’re a team you don’t need to feel guilty, I was looking for the excuse to come back anyway” you tell him shaking your head as you looked down and smiled warmly at the two boys.

“I know but-“ Jake goes to argue but you interrupt.

“But nothing, think of it like a mission, if you need help on a mission you should always call for back up, and I think out of all of the missions you’ve been on this has been the best” you say with a small lopsided grin.

“it definitely beats Bolivia that’s for sure” Jake scoffs earning a warning glare from you “right sorry no joking about that” he apologises quickly.

“but you’re right” Jake says smiling down at Anya in his arms “this is the best mission ever”

He looked back over at you before grinning, leaning down at you to press a sweet kiss to your lips.

“I love you Jakey” you smile up at him.

“I love you too sweetheart” he grins kissing you once more.

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