#mari andrew

[themindmovement]

“I'm not entitled to many of the things I miss: a town whose name I forgot that I visited for only 4 hours, characters in a book written 30 years ago, the version of a relationship that was completely in my head.

Missing follows no logic. I miss things I didn't enjoy. I miss New York while I'm here. I miss long commercials advertising compilation CDs. I miss CDs. I miss school. I miss how much fun I had to make up for how much I hated my job. I miss my last hair color even though I was sick of it. I can already feel myself missing this month even though it's an unremarkable month. My coffee getting cold when I walk outside. Why would I miss that? I bet I will.

I miss not knowing what being this age would feel like. I miss all the unknowns of youth even though they’re excruciating. I miss aspects of awful times, like how a breakup makes everything feel 10000x more important and how being confused about my life made me a more fun dresser. Sometimes I really miss how badly I wanted what I have now, the afternoons I filled dreaming about it.

I miss celebrities I never knew because I miss the illusion of a stable world in which they are invincible and some things never change.

Or perhaps I miss them because I miss my dad or perhaps I miss them because I miss being 11 years old or perhaps because they mattered to me. And isn’t saying ‘I miss you’ or ‘I miss it’ the same as saying ‘You matter to me’ or ‘This mattered to me’?

Italian and french (and probably others?) say ‘I miss you’ in a way that can be literally translated to ‘You are missing from me.’ This framing doesn’t quite resonate with me because missing doesn’t make me feel decreased; it makes me feel like a fuller person with a bigger life.

It makes me feel like my life is expanding years and cities from where I am now, into homes now occupied by other people and into months that no longer exist. Missing keeps me in touch with all the ages I've ever been and all the love I've ever felt.

A melancholy part of growing up is that you start realizing that missing doesn't always have an action step. I used to think that if I missed a person, I should go back to him. If I missed a place, I should move back. Now I just have to let that feeling sit, and I'm not sure how to entertain it or calm it down. I have to tell it, ‘Yep, it's hard, huh?’ and then keep doing what I'm doing. Or sometimes I miss someone I haven't talked to in three years and text him ‘Come to nyc please?’”

— Mari Andrew

[lockheartardenpublishing]

“I feel like I tip-toed into a room that most of us never have access to. It was so scary that I’m sure it wasn’t meant for me to see. Now, I live in a beautiful, light-filled room, but I can’t shake the memory of what I saw.”

– Mari Andrew, My Inner Sky 💖

[feral-ballad]

Courtney Marie Andrews, from Old Monarch: Poems; “See”

[Text ID: “How rare to see someone and feel. / How rare to see someone and know / you are not alone, / for your eyes are theirs, / your pain, too. / How rare to truly see someone.”]

[deadclawshc]

he’s so cutie

[mmwm]

LINK FEST: 28 MAY 2024

Links that may or may not be related to gardens, food, travel, nature, or heterotopias and liminal spaces but probably are. Sources in parentheses. map: The World’s 100 Largest Islands, Side by Side (David Garcia/Vivid Maps). Also, a sortable list of the islands. essay: Blue Notes #19: Is my marriage weird? An investigation (Mari Andrew/Out of the Blue). I’m sorry, this is another paid…

[dailydisneyships]

Julie Andrews and Dick Van Dyke starring in Mary Poppins (1964) Dir. Robert Stevenson

[didanagy]

THE SECRET GARDEN (1993)

dir. agnieszka holland

[limeseltzer4ver]

Bc you cannot tell me that huge ass fire he started wasn’t so explosive

[operose-art]

"In eight years on the run, Neil had been through sixteen countries and twenty-two name."

[potato-lord-but-not]

THE REST OF MALTOBER AWOOGA

[likesummerrainn]

Animal Kingdom 4x08: Ambo

[falafels]

pt.25!! <pt.24 pt.26>

french translation (please correct me if you know better as my french has got holes in it):

-can we do it again soon?

-get a grip, kevin. yes.

tag gang!! @andrewsleftarmband @blurryhour @you-know-i-get-itt @notexactlythatgirl @strangeoffputtingrat @tessasilverswan @minyard-05 @carbon-dated-gal @bisexualchaosdemon @stormiiflies @watercoloureyes01 @vampire-overlord @iron-sides @azure-wing @buffalo-fox @ohgodnotagainplease @pink-hydrangea @jaywalkerss @ohmynoggin-blog @cosmic-marauder @min-getoutofmy-yard @plazybones @disastersappho @leestars13 @the-witch-forever-lives <333

[feral-ballad]

Courtney Marie Andrews, from Old Monarch: Poems; “Against all odds”

[Text ID: “I am sorry. I love you. I cherish you. Our sweet memories are a museum in which I have a lifelong admission.”]

[stop-being-the-rabbit]

my favourite thing about all for the game has got to be the fact that the guy who spent three years in juvie, killed his mother and is on court-ordered mood stabilisers and the child of a serial killer who spent most of his life on the run and is also a pathological liar somehow manage to have the healthiest relationship i have ever read in a piece of media. literally wild

[animations-daily]

MARY POPPINS (1964) dir. Robert Stevenson