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satsuma-saturn · 4 years

Text

The Green-Eyed Monster - Leviathan x Reader

A/N: I literally started and finished this last night, so the writing may not be the best lmao. I’ve opened my ask box for requests, so I’m going to start on those, hopefully getting them out as soon as I can

WC: 1672

Warning(s): cursing, possessiveness

fic below the cut

Envy is a hideous emotion, bringing pain to those who suffer from it and those around them. Sufferers of Envy can never be satisfied, always pained by the sight of another’s good fortune. As in the play, Macbeth, Macbeth is envious when he learns from King Duncan that Malcolm will be crowned king next. Being king is what he so desires after the witches tell him of his prophecy. In order to remedy his situation, he resorts to assassinating King Duncan so that he may become king, his wife being the catalyst for his actions. You see Envy as a daily occurrence, when someone wants what others have, but their object of desire is just out of their reach. Even if they obtain their object of desire, when they see something that another has that they want, they are suddenly filled with an envious rage, always wanting to have the best, to be the best.

Yet, when you look into the eyes of Envy, you never see the so-called “Green-Eyed Monster.” Instead you find yourself greeted with soft, golden eyes, filled to the brim with doubt and self-loathing. Sometimes, in your peripheral, you can spot another emotion: longing. When you turn to look at him, he looks away, turning into a blushing, stuttering mess. However, that blushing, stuttering mess is no more when Envy sees you appearing to give more attention to his brothers, always viewing himself as lesser than them. It isn’t fair. Why won’t you pay attention to him? Would you rather be with one of his brothers? Perhaps Lust, or even Pride? Is he not good enough for you? He can be better, as long as you remain his and only his. You can be happy with him, just don’t spend too much time with his brothers. That will only anger him.

“Leviathan.” Your voice is soft as you attempt to get his attention. Still, he refuses to look at you, those golden eyes glued to his tv. The blue light illuminating his face causes him to look washed-out, drawing attention to his already pale skin and the dark circles under his eyes. He’s always tired, but refuses to sleep, unlike Belphegor, who you feel sleeps too much. Rather than sleep, he stays awake, vigilantly watching his social media feeds for the release of a new game or anime. “Leviathan,” you repeat, your stubbornness surfacing as you try, to no avail, to grab his attention. Of course, he hears you calling out to him, but he chooses to pretend you aren’t there. It’s less painful than the reality. You hate him. Why else would you go out with Beel to dinner? What does Beel have that he doesn’t? Sure, he isn’t tall or muscular like Beel, but he can be good to you. Perhaps it’s because he’s a yucky otaku that you don’t like him. It isn’t fair. His brothers always had what he wanted, your attention and praise. Still, even as you try to talk to him, his eyes remain glued to his screen, his attention to his anime unwavering.

A small sigh escapes you as you stand in his doorway, unmoving. In most cases, you are the unstoppable force to Levi’s immovable object, but you’re tired. To you, it is clear that he won’t give you the time of day. It has been almost twenty minutes since you first tried to get his attention. Twenty minutes too long to be spending in the doorway of someone giving you the silent treatment. Truth be told, you have no idea why he’s angry at you, which is what you’re trying to figure out. Even if he were to scream at you, it would be better than the silence you’re receiving. At least you would know why he’s angry. If he wants to be angry, then he can be, but you’re not waiting any longer for him to come around. When he’s ready to talk to you, he knows where your room is.

Silently, you exit his room, leaving him to his own devices. You’re sure he doesn’t notice you leave his room, being consumed by whatever brightly colored anime he’s watching. Disappointing, but you should have expected it. He is Levi, after all, the self-proclaimed otaku. It would be like pulling teeth to try to steal his attention from an anime. However, you know that’s not why he’s ignoring you. No, it’s for a different reason, and you’re not sure what. Levi isn’t the type to bottle up his feelings, as he’s normally very open and you will know when he’s upset and why he’s upset, but at the moment, you’re still in the dark. It hurts. Why is he acting like this? Did you do something wrong? What happened to you being his Henry? The Lord of Shadows would never ignore Henry like that.

When you leave, he notices. He’s disappointed and feels a little betrayed at your disappearance, wishing you were still talking to him. Eventually, he planned on responding, but he wanted you to stew in silence first. Clearly, that was the wrong approach. All he’s done is upset you. With a small sigh, he reluctantly stands up to follow you to your room, craving the attention that he’d been receiving from you a few seconds prior. A knock on your door and you’re quick to answer. His heart pangs when he sees your face drop at the sight of him. You were expecting someone else, weren’t you? Maybe you were seeking Mammon, who you’ve been spending a lot of time with. Why does he always get your attention? What makes him so special to you? Why can’t he have what he has? It’s hard for him to understand why you’d even want to give that greedy scumbag the time of day.

“What do you want?” You ask, your voice no longer holding its soft, concerned tone. Why had he sought you out, especially after giving you the silent treatment? What, did he want to hurt you more? Maybe he’s pissed that you left and now he’s come to give you a piece of his mind.

“I…” Levi had followed you to apologize, but now he just wants to know. He wants to know why he isn’t good enough for you. Why do you prefer his brothers over him? It’s not fair!

A sigh leaves your lips. “If you have nothing to say, then I’m shutting the door. Don’t follow me inside. I don’t understand why you’re cross with me, but I’d rather you tell me what I did. Instead, you ignored me. It hurt my feelings, Levi. We’re supposed to be friends. Friends don’t give friends the silent treatment.” You press your lips into a frown, chewing on the inside of your cheek.

The purple haired demon opens his mouth to explain, but speaks before thinking. “You went with Beel to dinner. At Hell’s Kitchen. You spent a lot of time with him there and I got jealous. Of Beel. What does he have that I don’t? It’s not fair that he gets to hang out with you. It’s not fair that he ate dinner with you when you should’ve been in my room, watching anime with me. Why do you like him more? Do you hate me? Am I not good enough for you?” His questions fly out of his mouth, rapid fire, not giving you the time to consider one question before another one is asked. All you can think is, what the hell?

You laugh, humorlessly. “You’re pissed because I went to dinner with Beel? What the fuck, man? He’s my friend, just as you are. There is no reason to be jealous. You’re just being shitty right now. I probably hang out with you the most, but that’s not enough? You are good enough, and I don’t hate you, but I’m pissed off right now. I’m pissed that you’re angry because I was hanging out with someone other than you. You’re acting so self-important. I don’t want to talk to you right now. Goodbye.” Of course, constantly hanging out with him isn’t enough. He’s the Avatar of Envy. Jealousy consumes him when he sees you with his brothers. It’s too late for more excuses, you decide. Maybe you’re being irrational, but so is he, and two can play at that game. So, you shut the door in his face, leaving him staring at the door, unable to see behind it.

Dejectedly, he trudges back to his room, head hanging low. He fucked up, royally, and he doesn’t know how to fix it. The hurt in your eyes was all too clear, even to a socially inept otaku like himself. Still, he feels as if you could have made an effort to understand him. Despite what he may seem, he is still a demon. Demons aren’t quick to change nature, especially not him or any of his brothers. They each govern a different Sin for a reason. Now that you won’t be spending your evenings with him, who will you spend them with? Maybe Belphegor? The Avatar of Sloth was fond of cuddling you while he slept. Though, why would the demon who killed you deserve your attention more than he does?

The Green-Eyed Monster sits in his dark room, alone and heartbroken.Tears roll down his cheeks and snot dribbles from his nose as he clenches his fists in frustration. You are supposed to be his Henry! A sob escapes him and he wipes his nose on his sleeve, leaving behind a trail of snot. Envy is a miserable, lonely emotion. Perhaps he could have had you, but you slipped through his cold, clammy fingers. Maybe it’s what he deserves for being a yucky otaku, a shut-in. Why can’t he have you? It isn’t fair. What makes his brothers more deserving of his attention? The Avatar of Envy will never know the truth, especially when he only sees through the lenses of his Sin. He is Envy and Envy is he.

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domesticmail · 4 years

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hammocks and hamburgers

word count: 1.6k

pairing: jj maybank x artist!reader

summary: this is BASICALLY 1.6k words of u being a dumbass artist and jj pining, bc i don't feel like y'all are together yet in this whole fic au whatever this is lmao

requested: no

You do not want to leave The Chateau tonight. And for once, it’s not because you’re being antisocial.

Tonight, you’re focusing on what you think is probably the greatest thing you’ll ever paint. Maybe that’s a stretch, you’re not a bad artist, and you’ve been getting better and better with every painting, but this is special. This is real, and you’re not going to let it be ruined by JJ’s restlessness.

“C’mon, loser, we’re going to get food.”

You don’t even bother turning to him, scared that if you look away, you’ll ruin the magic. And god, how could you ruin something as beautiful as this? “Correction: You guys are going to get food. I’m staying here.”

JJ is jangling the keys in his hand, trying to get your attention. He loves your dedication to your art; really, he does, it’s adorable the way you throw yourself into every painting, but god damn, it is difficult to get you to go out. It’s not like this is a date, he’s not going to break the rule (No pogue on pogue macking, he reminds himself, like a mantra, every time he sees you at the easel, brows furrowed, biting the inside of your cheek, so focused, so beautiful – but the rule, the rule, no macking on other pogues, JJ, you idiot), it’s just dinner at The Wreck, but you won’t even look at him. You look absolutely dead set on staying in the same place, like you’re glued to that stool you’re sitting on.

“Y/N, it’s dinner. You’ve gotta eat, dude. Your body needs, like, nutrients and shit.”

“Okay, bring me back something, then.”

He groans. “You haven’t moved in hours. You’re gonna freeze like that.”

You shrug, not taking your eyes off the painting, putting care into each stroke. You’re really only half-focusing on everything he’s saying, anyway. If you have to go without dinner, so be it. You’ll survive if you skip one meal, right? “I’ll freeze here if it means I can finish my painting.”

“Y/N.”

“JJ.”

John B. peeks his head out of the door. “Yo, Y/N, dinner at The Wreck, c’mon.”

“She refuses to go, dude.”

“Go without me, just bring me back some food,” you tell John B., not bothering to turn and look at him, either.

“Anything specific?”

“No, just whatever.”

“Sounds good. C’mon, Jay, let’s go.”

JJ looks helplessly at John B., then throws his hands up in defeat. “Okay, whatever. Starve,” he says as they walk into the house, leaving you alone on the porch.

“Bye, guys,” you call after them. Their goodbyes echo through the house as you settle into your seat finally, all attention back on the painting.

Okay, so maybe you’re making a big deal out of nothing. The painting’s not even anything special, really – just the backyard. Not even that, actually. It’s of the hammock attached to John B’s tree, moved a few days ago by you, just so you could get this done. The hammock is a vanilla color, hanging off of the tree branch emptily. Swung a little to the side – maybe a gentle breeze is pushing it, or maybe someone just got out of it to go inside. Maybe they decided they’d watch the sunset in the hammock – the sun is down in the background, the sky is dark, stars beginning to shine – but got up once it got dark. Or maybe it was a little kid, being called in for dinner, Mom’s voice beckoning them inside. You’re leaving it open to interpretation on purpose, you want it to be for the viewer to decide who it is, giving it a personal feeling.

Your stomach rumbles. Okay, maybe you should’ve gone with everyone to The Wreck.

“Oh, the life of a starving artist,” you mumble to yourself.

It’s at least an hour later when JJ walks through The Chateau and stops in the middle of the hallway, eyes set on you at your easel. “Jesus christ, guys, she’s still there. She hasn’t even moved.”

Your head is bent forward, focusing on the hammock now, trying to give it that in-motion look. Your hand is gripping the brush, and you know that’s not how it should be, you should be using light strokes, should relax the brush in your hand, but you just have to get this right, it’ll kill you if it’s not right. It means so much to you for this to look good, for this to be good, and if you mess up the hammock, it’ll all be wrong, and wow, that stroke was too small, maybe be a little careful and make it a little wider, but not too much wider, you can do this, just focus, Y/N, focus.

JJ’s looking at you looking at your painting, watching you with – is that admiration? Love? Appreciation? Even he doesn’t really know – he just knows he likes the way you look there, bent over on the stool, one hand holding a brush, the other gripping the front of the stool, stabilizing yourself. You’re doing that thing he loves, eyebrows pushed together, mouth pursed, judging the stroke you just made, and here you go – his favorite thing: your teeth pull your bottom lip in, gnawing at it, and you scrunch your nose, pulling back, free hand removing itself from the stool and tucking a stray hair from your bun behind your ear. You pull the brush back, and maybe your nose itches, or you see something on it, because you move to itch your nose, and accidentally poke your face with the end of the brush. You rear back a bit at the unexpected action, almost falling off of the stool, but stabilize yourself quickly, and there you go with another little thing he loves, the way you close your eyes and laugh at yourself, giggling like it’s an inside joke with yourself. He’d give anything to make you laugh that way, so unconscious of yourself, so genuine.

Pope knows exactly why his friend is just standing there, staring at you.

“JJ’s pining again,” he announces.

John B. snorts and moves up behind JJ, pushing his shoulder with the hand not holding a takeout bag. “Dude. Go talk to her.”

JJ turns around and recoils, then straightens his posture indignantly. “I’m not pining.”

“Right, you’re just simping.”

“I’m not fucking simping – ”

Kie and Sarah join the group now. “What’s this about JJ being a simp?” Sarah asks.

“I feel like we already knew that,” Kie says, and they look to each other and nod in agreement.

“Okay, why is everyone teaming up on me? You’re supposed to be my friends.”

John B. nods. “Yeah man, that’s why we’re calling you out for being a total simp.” He tosses the takeout bag to JJ, who fumbles and catches it. “Go give her her food, you goon.”

JJ scoffs, but turns around nonetheless. You appear to not have heard any of their conversation, and thank god for that. If you thought he was a simp, he’d run in front of a bus. No thanks.

When he opens the back door to the porch, your head snaps his direction. “Oh thank god,” you say, dropping the paintbrush to get off the stool and take the bag from his hands. Within literal seconds, you’ve opened the to-go box and are eating a burger – a fucking amazing burger, you inform him.

“You eat like an animal when you’re starving, fuck, Y/N,” JJ says, grinning.

“I’m hungry,” is your only response, because hey, brevity is the soul of wit – and it’s true, anyway. You’re hungry.

“Maybe you should, like, eat actual meals, then.”

“Maybe you should, like, not smoke so much, and not get drunk all the time,” you retort, raising an eyebrow at him.

“Hey,” JJ says, putting a hand to his heart in mock offense. “I don’t get drunk all the time. Just like, two days every week.”

You’re silent.

“Okay, three days.”

Still silence.

“Four is the best you’re gonna get, Y/N.”

You nod approvingly, smiling. “Thank you for the food,” you say after swallowing.

“Yeah man. Couldn’t let my favorite artist starve.”

“Awwww, I’m your favorite artist?”

“I…I don’t know any other artists.”

“Oh, I’m so disappointed,” you tease, grinning.

“How’d the painting go?” He asks, gesturing to the easel.

Your smile drops and you sigh, returning to sit on the stool. “I think I messed up the hammock.”

“Oh no!” He says, faking shock. “How terrible!”

You laugh. “I get it, it’s not a big deal, but…” You sigh, looking over at the canvas. Everything’s right at first glance, but then you see the hammock, and all of a sudden nothing is right, it’s all wrong. “I messed up one part, and it was the most important thing, so now it’s all messed up.”

“Lemme see.” He rolls his eyes, coming to stand behind you and analyze your painting. He rests his chin in his hand, examining the canvas with mock expertise, one eyebrow raised. The over-the-top pretending makes you giggle.

After a second, he leans back and crosses his arms. “I don’t know what you did wrong. It looks great.”

You shrug. “I dunno. Doesn’t feel like it looks great.”

He smiles, pushes your shoulder lightly. “Well, I couldn’t paint like that, so…you’re better than me.”

“Oh my god, did a member of the Maybank family just tell me I’m better than him?”

This earns you an eye roll. “Here we go.”

“This is a momentous occasion. This is historical. Seriously. Guys, come out here – ”

“No, no, stop it, shut up – ”

“JJ admitted that I’m better than him at something!”

“God damn it.”

#jj maybank #jj maybank x reader #outer banks #john b routledge #kiara carrera #sarah cameron #pope heyward #YES i love artist!reader #artist!reader

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apathycarestostudy · 4 years

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Motivate me to get my butt in gear friend !! Uni opens again in a month !! Must finish syllabus before then !! Must stop reading fics and being in denial! Help! (P.S ily :p♡)

Hello hello love. Here are some tips I think will help, mixed in with a bit of nagging, wrapped up with some tough love!

So here we are. First, I’d like to commend you for recognizing that it’s time to get back on the hamster wheel so soon. You’ve a month left, which is ample enough.

Don’t beat yourself up with time lost

You might be thinking you should’ve gotten up sooner, or done more, or done something some time ago. That doesn’t matter anymore. Yes, I’m an advocate of owning up to your faults, but for one second - recognize it, acknowledge it, and then move the hell on. Never mull on it unless it poses a problem and mulling on it would fix it. So stop all those thoughts - make a firm decision that you will drop all berating, toxic, or otherwise negative thoughts at the door. It won’t go away soon, you’ll need to keep stopping yourself mid-thought, but try to get it down. It’s a simple thing to start with, and I believe you can do this much. My mom always tells me, once someone apologizes, take their apology and leave it at that. The resentment won’t go away quickly, but release it. And I believe when you apologize to yourself, you should forgive yourself, and release.

So please release it.

The three Ps I just made up - paper, pen & plan (or phone, pad & plan)

I tried lmao. Phones be ruining everything. If you didn’t get it tho, by pad, I meant notepad or memo or whatever’s on phones these days. Specialized apps, all of it. It’s just that none of them started with a P and I -

Get your preferred medium of...recording stuff, and don’t make a plan. Yet. I want you to write down a list of things you need to get down before the month is up. A sentence per task. For example:

Get more connections on LinkedIn

Save up 20% of my allowance

Finish a writing commission

Finish a course I signed up for

(..........)

So something like that. One liners you need to finish up. And then don’t plan yet. After you’re done listing everything that needs to get done, you split the page in half (or just write it next to it in parentheses on your phone like this) and write “constraints”. Not emotional ones at first - try and write a logical constraint. Like for the course I signed up for, the logical constraint would be I have no time for it anymore because I got something better - an internship opportunity - and the emotional constraint would be I’m not interested in it anymore, or I don’t wanna lol. So write up some logical constraints. Is the workload a lot? Are you family members sending you off to do stuff for them and you have no choice but to do them and forsake your time? Do you not have an empty notebook to get started? These are all valid hurdles you may face.

Now, if you have some that have no constraints yet, write your emotional ones. You don’t want to. You’d rather do something else. Fanfiction. All of that.

Look back at your list. What’s causing the emotional ones? How can you get rid of the logical ones? Remove them, run away from them, address them, or ignore them - pick one.

Now, plan.

Distractions

So when I feel like I should get up and do something, I’m learning to seize that feeling prematurely and do it. I say prematurely because you know when the thought matures, you’re gonna talk yourself out of it or dismiss it, so you gotta grab that as soon as it crosses your mind. How to stop doing what you’re doing immediately? Remove access to the distraction. And I don’t mean use those apps - although if it works for you, go on with your bad self. If not, do the old school method of throwing your phone to the roof of your cupboard.

Yeah. I had this period of time where nothing stopped me from indulging in fanficion - not even deadlines and consequences, which are the biggest things that drive me to do stuff, and the only way I could get over it was to throw my phone over the cupboard. I gave myself a hurdle to stop me from pulling it back towards myself, and not only that, imagine the shame of getting a chair, dragging it all the way to the cupboard, climbing up on that thing, and then pulling your phone down - just squeezing lemon juice in your damn eye and living with that burn. So, put a hurdle up.

(cupboard = dresser btw, not sure which word y’all use so)

You don’t need a whole lot to get started

Going back to not having an empty notebook. There was a time I needed one to get started, but I didn’t want to go out and buy one, and so I kept putting off my work and blaming the fact that I don’t have a notebook. You don’t really need the notebook to get started. I could’ve easily pulled out my laptop and used One Note or MS Word or whatever if I really wanted to work. I mean I hate using digital stuff, but I could’ve sucked it up if I really didn’t want to go out and really wanted to work. The right answer was I really didn’t want to work, not the notebook.

Just start. Screw the notebook, screw your shitty pen, screw the messy table - just start. Shove all the mess to the edge and cram your arms in that tiny space and just start. You don’t need highlighters or a bottle of water or quiet time or the lights dimmed three notches down or your face moisturized or your plants watered - just start.

Not saying all of that is unnecessary, or wouldn’t help, but when it comes down to it, you don’t need all that to start. Don’t waste your time preparing to study or work. Just start.

Just start. Get your scrappy paper that’s 1/4 cut in a weird angle and just start.

One thing is better than nothing

I know I’ve said that a whole lot. A WHOLE LOT. But it’s true, and you truly need to take that to heart. If you’ve scratched one thing off your list, that’s good.

But here’s what I’d do if I felt like I needed to do more.

First, seize that feeling. Next, do more. Start a little mantra of, “Just one more!” and do it like you’re taking one more cookie out the cookie jar. One more cupcake. One more chip. One more practice question. Romanticize it. Say it like you desperately want it, even if you don’t and do it. Oftentimes it’s the start that has us feeling some type of way, but once you accept what it is - as in you start eating it a little more quickly - you’ll sink into it and release that feeling. Next thing you know, you’ll find yourself done with one more thing.

Still tho, one thing today is one thing off your plate. Celebrate that, and promise you’ll do one more - at that moment or some other time.

Lesson from Naruto: give yourself a self-rule!

So there was this character in Naruto that was a total failure. He didn’t make it into the ninja academy, so he decided to give himself a self-rule: “If I run 500 laps, I’ll be accepted as an alternate.” which means he’ll be placed as a back up in case an already accepted student drops out. His father finds out, scolds him, and says that’s not a self-rule. That’s a wish. A self-rule doesn’t involve anyone else. A failure to accomplish what you say is accountable to you. Not circumstance, not anyone else.

His father says, “Because of that [a self-rule on your self only], you are able to gather your strengths and focus on your efforts...That is how a self-rule works!” So how does the character change it? “If I can’t do 500 laps on my hands, I’ll do 500 push-ups!”

You see what I’m going for?

I am not saying do 500 laps on your hands - this is a ninja anime we’re talking about here - I’m saying apply a self-rule that keeps you accountable and feeds into your efforts. Say, “If I can’t do ten practice questions, I’ll do ten rounds of this example question!” Give yourself an alternative you have to do if you fail your first attempt, and have it be of the same magnitude. What happens if you can’t do both? Keep adding on of course! The character would say, “If I can’t do 500 laps on my hands, I’ll do 500 push-ups! And if I can’t do 500 push-ups, I’ll do 500 sit-ups!”

Limitations exist, and you may not be able to get it the first few times, but eventually, the character manages to do 5000 laps - and he falls tiredly into his father’s waiting arms.

Just a little nice bonus I thought would be fun to add. I do something like this, but not as well thought out of course - I’d say something like, “I’ll do process design questions right now, and if I give up half-way, chemical separation processes is waiting for me.”

I thought I’d stop here because it’s getting kind of ramble-y and I think this’ll be enough of a push to get you started. Maybe not a push even - a nice little pat from your friend that’ll evolve into a push by your fine self. You can do it. Just start LOL.

I’mma end this with a positive note from that same episode of Naruto. Here’s a quote from that father to his son when he asked him why he was so chipper when he failed so much and couldn’t be “strong” (as in overcome the obstacles in his way). I see this in our lives, be it with friendships, biting your tongue when your boss yells at you, or giving up after failing a class.

“True victory isn’t about winning from someone strong. It’s about defending what’s important to you!”

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scarofthewind · 4 years

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If requests are open, could possibly write something for David from The Lost Boys(with a fem reader)??? Doesn’t matter what it’s about, as long as it has a bit of angst and romance;)) lmao love ur writing btw

A/N: Hello everyone, I apologize for taking forever to finally update. I’m back and will try to update more. Requests are open and you can expect that I will be writing for anime every now and then.

David knew from the moment he laid eyes on you that you were the one. Not his victim, but his life- his future. Your laugh seemed to be the only thing he could hear as time endlessly passed around the carousel. The boys were waiting for a signal to start something with a victim but were lost when there wasn’t one. Paul pointed out that David was distracted, but they didn’t know what had his attention. David meant to keep it that way. He wanted no one else to remotely look at you, nevertheless breathe your scent the way he was. It was utter infatuation the moment he saw you.

All good things come to an end. Oh how he wanted the ride to last forever, to watch from afar as you smiled and radiated your beauty from paces away. While you joked and laughed with a friend who was next to you, the ride slowed and David started to become aware of his surroundings again.

He moved forward, only to have his attention caught by the boys who looked confused and irritated. “You alright, man?” Paul asked, looking to see what David was looking at. Nodding, David got off the ride and took one last look at you before walking ahead of his group. They would just have to pick someone later for food.

As you jumped off the ride, your friend walked next to you. “He was totally checking you out!” She smiled. Shaking your head you brushed the conversation off, trying not to watch as he and his friends left the boardwalk.

David spent the next month watching you from afar. He eventually came up with a plan for talking to you but it backfired. You and your friend went to the annual movie on the beach to watch a scary movie; David sat a few yards away, watching every movement you made and hearing everything you said.

Your friend jumped next to you when the movie became intense. “I don’t like these vampire movies. They hit too close to home, you know?” She said gesturing to the surrounding area. Santa Carla was known for its vampire stories after all.

“I can understand that, but do you think vampires are actually this ugly?” You pointed to the screen.

Your friend tilted her head in thought and nodded, “They probably are. That’s why they only come out at night too because no one wants to see their ugly mugs in the day.”

You laughed at your friends over exaggeration. “They are all monsters anyway,” she said.

“I guess you’re right.” You said, feeling a shiver go up your spine. You quickly turned to look behind you, but all you saw were the beach waves. Goosebumps rose along your skin and you scanned the area, catching glimpse of a figure in the distance walking away.

“Are you okay?” Your friend asked, concerned to what you were looking at.

When he finally disappeared from sight you nodded, “Yeah. I’m fine.”

The gang had never seen David so upset. He wasn’t angry, he was just sad. “Dude you’re suffocating me.” Paul groaned from across the room. The cave was colder tonight as it had rained the night before.

David glared at Paul and continued messing with his hands. Dwayne sat up in his chair and nudged Marko who was falling asleep beside him. Paul continued, “Are you okay, David? We are worried about you.”

“Have you ever thought that maybe being a vampire was a mistake?” David shot out. Paul’s cigarette fell from his fingertips.

“You are in love with a human.” Dwayne responded, erning a groan from Paul.

“Seriously? That’s the number one rule David-”

“I know Paul, I made half the rule’s including that one.” He sighed, running a hand through his hair.

“It’s that girl from the boardwalk isn’t it?” Marko asked, causing David to freeze. “You’re too obvious, man.”

Before David could respond Dwayne continued, “Why don’t you turn her?”

“She said that our kind are nothing but monsters.” The room fell quiet and for a moment, everyone felt the pain. They were so young when they were turned, they would stay young forever now, never getting to grow old with the person you love; only being able to watch them waste away.

“Shit, David.” Paul sighed. They all felt it then, the sad reality of being immortal.

You bit your lip and waited. Your arms were crossed over your chest and you felt your knees shake nervously. You stood near the entrance to the boardwalk, hoping you’d see him. The man you’ve noticed everywhere within the past month.

The man that you somehow cared for.

Behind you, Paul had a shit-eating smirk on his face as he parted from the group who was already past the entrance. He briskly walked over to you and wrapped an arm around your shoulder.

His grin grew wider when he felt you flinch and heard your heartbeat quicken. “Hello, doll-face. I’ve noticed that you are looking for someone and I might be able to help you find them.”

You turned to face the young man in front of you. “I don’t know you.”

“That’s correct, but, I know that you know David, so to speak.” He shrugged, fixing his jacket cuff. “Paul. That’s my name.”

It took a moment for it to register but you took a step back when you realized who or what was in front of you right now. Paul Harris was a teenager when he went missing from the exact boardwalk you were standing at. He was one of the Santa Carla vampire stories that had freaked you out as a kid.

Paul noticed something in you change and he smirked, “Are you scared?” His eyes flashed a different color for a second and you almost stumbled back.

“Paul Harris.” Your scared voice only made him chuckle as he grabbed your wrist and pulled you towards his friend group.

“David really likes you. And whenever I mention his name your heart beats faster so I’m guessing you like him too.”

“I don’t even know him.” You argued, trying not to make a scene out of fear for your life.

“You will.” Paul turned his head and smiled at you, his canines longer and pointier than they were three seconds prior.

“Wait!” You snapped your wrist back, stopping in your place. You saw a tall brunette next to David turn towards the commotion caused by his friend. “Oh my god.”

Your heart beat faster than you could ever imagine and you felt like you were going to faint. Dwayne Stephens, Mark Thompson. David Williams. “You...all of you...” You looked to Paul who had a bored look on his face.

“I know what you’re thinking. That hurts. We are still people, plus we don’t want to eat you.” Paul motioned to the group and you made eye contact with David for the first time in a while. Paul smirked and whispered to you, “But if you run away from him, he’ll be upset. We all eat good when he’s upset.”

David had no words that could prepare him for what Paul did. Dwayne nearly ripped the boy’s head off his shoulders as he shoved him out of the way. “Not cool man.” He growled.

“What did I do? I figured that if any of us deserved to be happy it should be David.” Paul argued.

Marko replied, “Yeah but telling her what we are...”

“He didn’t.” You said softly, your eyes meeting their shocked ones. “I’m familiar with the stories. I know who you are.” You looked back to David, “What you are.”

“Trust us, (Y/N), if we wanted to hurt you we would’ve done it by now.” Paul said before Dwayne slapped a hand over his mouth.

Thoughts bubbled in your head and you made sense with what they were saying. “We only eat jerks.” Marko said, making you look at him. “I don’t think you’re a jerk.”

“I-”

“Don’t say anything.” Your heart raced as David spoke, your eyes met his once more and you felt like crying. This was a broken person. He had the face of a teenager but the age of an older man. He’d seen more than you had in your entire life and that was more than you needed to know how much he felt this. He needed you; you could feel it. “This never should’ve happened, I’m sorry.”

Paul stiffened against Dwayne’s grip and Marko stood a little straighter. Their leader was in pain and they felt it more than they could see it. They all looked so abandoned; they were the lost boys of Santa Carla.

[Part 2 if y’all want]

#the lost boys #vampire #lost boys 1987 #[✉️].request

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newbornwhumperfly · 4 years

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if I had an orchard...

CW: intoxication, negative self-talk, references to non-con, references to punishment, (brief) reference to vomiting

so i’m back on my bullshit, and by bullshit I mean I wrote another spinoff fic of the GW series!!! *hides face* insp. by my own ask (lmao) https://haro-whumps.tumblr.com/post/614488313974407168/if-you-would-consider-a-very-very-drunk-galo once again, I hope @haro-whumps enjoys!!!

the title of this fic comes from “helplessness blues” by fleet foxes

Galo is very, very drunk.

Well, maybe not twice very but he’s not sober, that’s for damn sure. He knows better than to try and stand now, at any rate, cause the ground keeps tilting in a funny and not-at-all scary way. Like a gentle roller-coaster. Or a see-saw. He needs to keep his eyes on the not-ground right now – probably a good idea. Maybe he shouldn’t have sat on the porch swing when he went outside to drink but, well, hindsight is…better. He giggles a little bit but it isn’t very silly and sounds all snotty, given that he’s crying and all.

He should probably stop crying.

Should is a great word. Means there’s something you ought to have done. Haven’t done yet. Are supposed to be doing.

He’s fucking everything up and he hasn’t the first clue of how to stop.

Case in point – this wine seemed like a really good idea at the time, especially after the second top-full glass had been swallowed. He’d only meant to get a bit buzzed, honest. It wasn’t healthy or wise but he found himself leaning more and more on the distraction when something inevitably crumbled around him. It was only once he’d wandered far into the realm of tipsy that he dimly wondered if getting hammered was the mature thing to do.

Fuck it, he’d decided with his big magnificent brain, and swigged straight from the bottle.

Seemed like a good idea at the time, isn’t that how the saying goes?

You’d think after all the Sunday school lessons he’d know when he was laying down paving stones on a winding trajectory straight to hell. Trying to do the right thing doesn’t mean shit when you hurt people anyway. No matter what you do, it’s gonna hurt, one way or another. Isn’t that what he’d said to himself? Giving himself an out to do whatever the fuck he wanted anyway?

Why did he get those gifts? Stroking his own ego? He didn’t mean to…but there it is. He’d wantedto do something and he just did it and dug the pit so much deeper and if he falls down and breaks his crown, well, too fucking bad, Jack. Should’ve thought of that before you went and stuck your foot in it. It’s so much worse than merely breaking his crown though, his crown was fine. He’d be fine.

He’s left them all tumbling after him. That’s the sin, the unforgivable blunder which sits on his chest. A heavy, cold, unyielding stone of guilt cramming the joy out of his lungs, pressing until his words sit sour on his tongue and every smile feels scraped hollow. He’s making it worse with his absurd self-pity, feels the taut chill of tension stretch the air thinner with every meeting.

He’d heard what they were saying. He didn’t mean to – spying on people was shitty and wrong. He’d been in the kitchen in the middle of the night and didn’t think anyone would be downstairs, ducking into the pantry at the sound of voices. If he hadn’t been so tired, he’d have thought better of it. What else is new? He’d have thought better of a lot of things.

What he’d heard between Nyla and Sasha and Evan was…horrible. The stuff they said, speculated on as casually as tomorrow’s weather, dropped his heart, icy and spinning, into his stomach, settling there to thrum shallowly and churn the swelling nausea.

How he’d clearly meant to show them that things such as eating or wearing clothes or sleeping in a bed or having hair and not being raped were…privileges. That they all ought to be grateful for less than basic fucking humanity. To be…allowed…to merely exist without pain and humiliation was to be seen as a precious gift from their Master. That they all ought to be grateful.

Galo had only kept from vomiting at the knowledge they would hear him. It was the first thing he’d done when able to sneak back to his room, hurling into the toilet. Panicking on the tile until he was sick again. He hadn’t cried that night, weirdly enough. It was all so raw, bloody and fresh in his mouth, it was like he hadn’t swallowed it yet. He didn’t truly feel the horror until he woke up, fitful and sweating, from a nightmare into the cold dawn and knew he had failed.

He was having nightmares now. No more sex dreams for good old Galo – at least, not good ones. More like utterly fucking horrific. He knew better, technically, then to let it haunt him. Knew that the dark dream-shadow of himself was a twisted echo of his own pain. It didn’t make him any less able to forget the way he was trapped inside himself during those nightmares, a puppet dancing on monstrous strings as he writhed and thrashed against his own fists and feet and arms and fingers, crushing and twisting and hitting – no.

His heart couldn’t give a shit what his big-smart-boy-brain calmly explained about these terrors. Smart enough to know it wasn’t real, that he’d never, for love or money or fucking God, hurt these people. Not smart enough to know how to make them know that.

The worst part about this living nightmare was how it was effecting everyone. More and more, Galo felt trapped in his own body, unable to stop his misery from bleeding through and staining the atmosphere with red, oozing tension. He was trying so hard to keep his smile soft (not brittle), his hands loose (not shaking), his eyes kind (not wet). He has taken to keeping out of their path as much as humanly possible, a delicate dance of dodging and sidestepping which left him dizzy and often more uncertain than ever. He’s almost certain that it isn’t helping. If it was a barbell to hoist or a level to beat or a paper cup to scoop off the grass and toss into the garbage, he could do that. But this? This can’t just be…fixed.

He can’t avoid them forever and he shouldn’t.

He just…doesn’t know what to do.

He should. He should fix it. It hurts.

Galo shook his head, violently, glugging the dregs of his bottle into the glass and letting it roll of the swing, hit the floor, break. He’s gonna have to clean that up, he thinks, downing his final glass before setting it on the ground near swaying feet. How dare he? How dare he feel sad? He’s not the one who thinks he’s gonna be beaten or raped or brutalized in some sick way he probably can’t even invent but has been done to these people who he ownsand can do anythingto and nobody’s stopping him but himself. Yeah, he should feel really fucking sad for himself right now.

It doesn’t stop the deep sobs dragged from his lungs, hitching his shoulders, seizing his limbs in feeble twitches. It is pathetic and despicable and he can’t stop. He hasn’t cried like this in a long time, not from regret, not from pure, cold, hard, driven misery. It’s mixing with the wine and making him dizzy and ill and that all only fuels his sadness. Awfully, stupidly, he wants to be comforted. Feels like a big fucking kid and just wants someone to pat him on the shoulder and say he did his best.

But he’s an adult.

A goddamn useless adult and he’s alone and helpless and his best isn’t enough.

Useless.

He sobs into his hands.

Useless.

~ ~

Nyla doesn’t realize she isn’t alone for a moment.

When Lilah squealed, sudden and sharp, from the tub with the fretful worry that she’s left her gloves outside, Nyla glided from the basement to find them as the only one still fully dressed. She moved quicker than usual, since nobody was around to see her, abandoning a little grace in favor of haste as she searched the porches encircling the house. Only at the final stop at the back of the house did she spot the object of her quest.

Slipping through the back door, shivering in the wintry air, she had plucked the bright mitts off the swing when she heard a muffled noise.

Heart leaping into a frantic pace, Nyla spun about, clutching the soft knit to her chest like a shield. An animal? A guest? She blinked hurriedly against the halo of dim lamps and through the blur, eventually, made out the source of the sound.

Master Galo.

She goes alert in a second, less, hairs on end on her nape and forearms, as she clasps her hands demurely in front of her and feels her smile slide easily into place, pulled quick across her face as a curtain on a rod, neat and wide and polite.

Perfect.

“Good evening, Master. I apologize for disturbing you.”

She notices that Master seems…hunched, for lack of a better word, curled in on himself on the farthest swing. His large legs are cross and tucked up under him, wide torso curved over his knees. It is only once he raises his head at her voice, ringing light and soft across the night air, that she realizes his face was buried deep in his enormous hands. It is another moment before she sees that he is…he is…

Master Galo is crying.

Sobbing. Even startled out of it, he is quaking, big body trembling with great heaving gasps.

“N-Nyla? What, what’re you, what, what’re you doing here?”

He is slurring and Nyla glimpses the glint of glass, a shattered bottle and discarded cup scattered below the swing beneath Master’s feet. He has been drinking and Nyla cannot suppress the shiver coiling through her body. It is more than the air, frigid and unrelenting against her flesh, which makes her shudder. She has never seen him really drunk before, doesn’t know what he might be like. It frightens her.

“I was searching for an item I left outside and came to retrieve it, Master.”

“’m sorry, can’t hear you?”

Nyla breathed. Low and steady, once, and strode forward, drifting like one of the snowflakes until she floated to a halt directly in front of Master Galo. At close quarters, the yellow glow of lamplight outlines Master’s face. It is wet, eyes puffy, his mouth turned harshly downwards at the corners.

Her smile widens without her trying, a mirror of her Master, corners stretching taut to her ears until her lips hurt.

Why is Master crying?

“Is there anything you require, Master? Whatever you wish, I am honored and ready to be of service.”

Master Galo nods and his mouth trembles, fingers curling below his chin, as he sniffs and tries to speak. He has to try more than once, most likely due to the alcohol. The broken bottle is empty, only a few drops of wine dripping from the shards upon the planks. Like blood.

“Of course you are. You’re always, you’re so good. So, so sweet all the time. You know that Nyla? You know how good you are?”

“Thank you, sir. I am grateful, Master.”

A moment after those words leave her lips, Master Galo’s mouth crumples and his shoulders begin to quake once more as tears pour anew down his soaked cheeks. Nyla goes abruptly cold, down through her skin to her blood, flowing frantic and freezing through her limbs. Master is displeased.

Nyla is spinning, airless, icy water trickling down her chest, a frigid current swirling around her heart. Master is crying. She doesn’t…she doesn’t knowwhat she is supposed to do? He is displeased but he is not angry. He is crying and not yelling or smiling in a bad way or a good way and she doesn’t know what to do.

She knows what do to.

Folding swiftly to her knees, she leans forward, bangs brushing Master’s dangling shins.

“I apologize, Master. I reacted poorly.”

“Please don’t say that, Nyla. P-please…you don’t, didn’t do anything wrong. You never do wrong.”

His hands, wet and shaky, fall into her periphery and he touches her shoulders, tugging upwards with his fingertips. His hands are like blocks of ice, chilling through the thin fabric of her gifted gown. She lets him guide her up and over until she is seated beside him on the swing. As soon as she sits, his touch flies from her, like he is flinching away from touching something too hot.

There is nothing she can do but remain where she has been placed, perfectly poised, perfectly still, perfect. Master Galo presses his hands to his face again, hitching once more, lurching forward to gasp and shudder into his palms. Nyla does not move or speak, presses down on the urge to apologize or offer or anything but sit like a quivering stone on the furniture while her Master is crying and wait.

“Don’t know what to do, Nyla.”

She suppresses a flinch at his muffled voice, still, wide-eyed and still-smiling as Master Galo raises his face again and stares at her mournfully. She finds herself pinned in place by his swollen green eyes, spilling tears which roll and drip off the end of his chin. He is the very picture of anguish and Nyla’s heart is fast and aching and a little sick.

“I…know I’m not, I’m trying but I…you think I wanna hurt you and I know why. Everyone’s fucking shit and, and, and you were sohurt. And it hurts me, fuck, no that’s…I’m sorry. I can’t do shit and it hurts because I don’t wanna hurt you or anyone and it’s not, I can’t make it different and I should. And you’re so scared. You’re so scared all the time.”

Master Galo shuts his eyes, rattling breath drawn deep, and he brushes his fingertips against her clasped hands.

“You’re scared right now.”

Nyla can’t breathe. She isscared. Fear courses, dark cold water, through her veins, ears thundering and swelling her throat closed. The water is inside her, choking her, a river in her chest where her heart should be, a crashing rumble against her ribs.

Her smile falters with the pain in her jaw, radiating through the strain in her mouth. She runs her tongue, furtive and quick, over her chapped lips. She lets her palms unclasp and fall open, the pooled sweat cooling in the open air as she lets Master Galo’s fingertips fall into the raisined cup of her hands.

“Master, please, if you would…tell me what you wish, I would do anything you require.”

Master’s hand shifts further within the little oval her palms have made and something she cannot name twinges when his palm twitches and presses, like a wild animal trying to hide and run at the same time. It is the nameless pang which causes Nyla to fold her hands shut around her Master’s, cloistering it, protecting it.

It is ridiculous and horrifying and wrong, how her two hands barely enfold his one. The chill of the palm draws the clammy heat from her touch and she squeezes, once, barely. She doesn’t breathe.

Master Galo’s sobbing stops, the hitching slowing. Nyla repeats the gentle squeeze, daring, somehow, to brush both thumbs, light as cobwebs, over his knuckles. His hiccups slow to juddering inhales and then, finally, soften to wet and raspy breath. His eyes are still shut but they aren’t clenched and tears no longer flow. Though his mouth is still tremulous and downturned, the crumple begins to smooth.

“Thank you.”

Nyla’s blood warms, slows, from its frigid undertow at the words. Fear doesn’t abate but it loses its bite. She loosens her squeeze, ceasing the movements of her thumbs and merely cradling the palm now. He is smiling now and Nyla does not know why she feels like he has mirrored her now. It is a silly thought, fleeting, and she lets is melt against the swirl of wariness and concern and confusion. But his eyes are gentle when he opens them and, in that moment, she cannot find it in herself to be afraid.

“I was grateful to be of service, Master.”

#don't mind me i'm just Obsessed with this series!! :)))#gw #haro-whumps #writing #galo #nyla #angst #intoxication #crying #trauma #emotional whump #guilt #galo is straight-up not having a good time :(((

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lucy-ghoul · 4 years

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16 17 18 for the ship ask?

16. Are there any ships you just can’t/don’t understand? What are they?

Yes. Usually they bore me, or I find them bland, or simply the dynamic isn't my cup of tea/is too vanilla/I don't get it. I have a few NOTPs, usually of the "I wouldn't touch this with a ten feet pole" kind that trigger my fight-or-flight response (no hate for the shippers, tho). The first ones that come to mind are Joker/Harley (I love them both, but not together. Just no), Littlefinger/Sansa and Th*amsay from ASOIAF, then blander stuff like Jo/Laurie from Little Women (apparently there's a 150 years long war going on in the fandom lol), F*nnrey from SW (I am a Reylo, and in another world I would have even liked them, but alas, antis exist and the shippers ruined the ship for me), Ichigo/Orihime from Bleach (I used to be a staunch IchiRuki fan, so you can guess my feelings about the manga ending lol, even if I've not been in the fandom for many years and now I don’t care that much tbh), Eleven/Clara from Doctor Who, Harry/Ginny from HP, Alucard/Seras from Hellsing (especially the manga/OVAs; the anime, maybe that’s a different story), Matt/Karen from Daredevil… But they're very few. I'm a multishipper and can get behind almost everything, especially if a fic is well-written. Believe me, I've read and enjoyed some weird stuff. Usually it's not that I hate some pairings or I am anti X ship, I simply don't care lmao. It's more of a *shrugs* whatever reaction than anything else, really. I don’t even block content, I genuinely don’t even care when they cross my dash. Go figure lmao.

17. Are there any popular ships that you just don’t like? What are they?

There are a few, yes! I deliberately avoided to mention them in the previous answer, so I wouldn't have to repeat myself.

First of all, Jon/Daenerys from ASOIAF; I like both characters (I especially love Dany to death, she's one of my favorite female characters ever), but… I swear it's not for the incest (that should've made it a little more interesting in my eyes), it's just that I don't care lol. Also Dean/Castiel from SPN; I remember that when I watched the show I couldn't understand the hype. Also, most recently, Geralt/Jaskier from The Witcher.

And… please, please, @villainsmatter, don't shoot me, but I first got into the Hannibal fandom through The Silence of the Lambs when I was 14 and back then the NBC show wasn't a thing yet, so I've never cared much for Hannibal/Will. In the books their relationship is very different from the show; basically, it's Clarice Starling who plays this role for Hannibal (and again, the last Hannibal book where the titular cannibal and his favorite FBI agent hook up and live happily ever after was published in 1999). That said, no hate for the show, the shippers, or even the ship itself. (Also, multishipping is a thing! And it's great.) Hannigr*m is one of those cases of “I get it, I really do, but for some unfathomable reason I can't get behind it”. Probably because Clannibal has been such a formative OTP for me in my young teen years, so I can't ship them with anyone else but each other. Which is rare for me, I assure you that I can ship almost anything.

I also don't care for most of the usual romcom/YA pairings (for example, The Hunger Games love triangle was the least interesting thing about the whole trilogy): I love romance, but apparently my tastes are weird, and most of them are so boring anyway.

18. What is your favorite unpopular ship?

As in, rarepair that nobody gives a fuck about? I have a lot of those, so I won't talk at length about them all, but if I'd get to choose only one… Tyrion/Daenerys from ASOIAF. I've been shipping them like crazy (me and like, 2 other people in the whole fandom) since the ADWD release, well before they officially met up in the show. They're probably two of the ASOIAF characters who share more parallelisms with each other, and in GoT it got confirmed that Tyrion harbored romantic feelings for Dany in the shitty last episode, but God, it was handled so badly (like everything else). It was also insane that no one could "see it" when Peter Dinklage had clearly stated in the interviews that Tyrion was "smitten" with Dany, and kept looking at her like that. I don't want to sound like the general anti and be like "if you don't ship this you're x-ist!!!!" because that's not the case, but I can't shake the feeling that had Tyrion looked more like his able-bodied brother, everyone would - not ship it, but realize that yes, he was falling in love with her, and no, it wasn't platonic. The general quality of the show's writing didn’t help, though, and D&D can’t, like, write romance (see also how they kept erasing Tyrion's sexuality and general complexity from Season 5 onward). But the subtext was there.

GRRM is famously a big fanboy of Beauty and the Beast, and Tyrion is his favorite character, so I wonder how different their relationship will be in the next books (if they ever get released, that is, which I'm starting to doubt). I don't expect any kind of happier or kinder resolution, though; I'm just curious.

Thank you, dear! ❤ (I hope my Hannigr*m reveal didn’t upset you lol)

#villainsmatter #asks

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rowanfoster · 4 years

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{ odeya rush ♔ twenty-three ♔ she/her } well, well, well if it isn’t rowan foster running around peach hollow. legend has it, she comes from tangerine towers and has lived here her entire life. if you’re wondering what she’s been up to, i hear she’s a make up artist / freelance musician for a living. she has been known to be impulsive yet insightful. a word of advice to her, always look over your shoulder. you never know who is watching.

why yes, it is i, admin kim, with another character that should’ve been kept in the drafts of my mind. if you’ve not met daysia or serenity, here’s a lil low down on me. i’m 26, i use she/her pronouns, and live on the east coast. i thrive on writing angst and my animal crossing villagers being happy. also caffeine. i luv chris klemens. most likely to have a mental breakdown on twitter. meet rowan! trigger warnings for mental illness, bipolar disorder specifically, and inpatient treatment

have a playlist and a pinterest board dedicated to her

rowan celeste foster was born may 27th, 1996. she’s the oldest of two, a baby sister coming to the scene in 1999.

her family is extremely close. they’ve been in peach hollow their whole lives. she grew up in a crowded house on blueberry boulevard, crammed in with her mother, father, sister, maternal grandmother and maternal grandfather. rowan never knew peace or privacy growing up – it just wasn’t possible with that many people which has really contributed to her somewhat isolated adulthood

her mother is a charge nurse at peach hollow general, working on the emergency room floor. her father is a retired car salesman. her grandparents moved into the house when her sister was born in order to help take care of the girls while their parents worked full time. rowan is especially grateful for their care, because she feels like she’d be a little more sour had she been raised by absent parents.

growing up, she shared a room with her younger sister. they told each other everything because they had no choice not to. they both developed an interest in make up and music at very young ages, but rowan particularly took to those things while maci took more interest in sports. when rowan was gifted her first ukulele at age 6, maci got her first basketball. they are polar opposites, but maci was the only person rowan really confided in as a child and an adolescent.

she’d always been rather moody. tantrums and fits were nearly unavoidable. her self esteem lacked before she even had a chance to develop any confidence. she was always the try hard, the girl who stood out because she was just a little different, the emotional one, the one the other kids didn’t want to mess with, not because she’d fight back, but because she would absolutely lose it. there were countless times where rowan ended up in the guidance counselor’s office, waiting on her grandmother to show up and bring her home. that was the beginning of their problems.

her mental health really started to decline in her mid teenage years. she spent hours upon hours in her room, writing songs, playing guitar, practicing make up looks – she’d go days without sleeping and snap at anyone who crossed her path. she got into screaming matches with everyone in the house, only to find herself crying in her bed for the next few days. she started missing days at a time from school, while her artistry thrive, the rest of her crumbled. her grades, all of it.

eventually, this resulted in her parents yanking her out of peach hollow high and putting her in counseling, which lead her to a psychiatrist and a diagnosis of bipolar disorder at the age of 17. while it made sense, she dreaded taking the medications. they numbed everything. her writing suffered, and while her moods weren’t swinging from the trees anymore, she feared that this empty feeling was worse.

she finished her high school diploma in homeschooling with her grandmother while maci went on to thrive in school. the attention shifted to her, and rowan couldn’t really blame them. she turned 18 and started performing in clubs, bars, and anywhere she could get in. ps her voice is a mix of bishop briggs & mary lambert. the thrill of performing to small crowds sucked her in. she began to gain an even smaller following on social media, mainly the locals following her. every once in a while she’ll book a show in atlanta and she’ll make the long drive just to sing in front of a bit of a larger crowd. she’ll gain a few followers from those shows, but this still isn’t her main source of income.

most of her money comes from the make up artistry she does through pop of peach. she doesn’t go in every day, but when someone has an event scheduled or needs their make up done for a dance or something, she’s there. she tries to spread things out bc she’s always late lmao and finds it hard to stick to a schedule

she was doing so well for a few years, even moved out of her parents’ house and into an apartment at the towers. that’s where she really found herself, made some real friends and built relationships that were good for her. however, she missed a few doctor’s appointments and was discharged from her psychiatrist’s office. she went off meds, and for a few weeks it was fine. when she ran out of meds, the next few weeks were okay as well. it was when every single drop of medication had drained from her body that things got bad.

rowan was missing appointments she scheduled at pop of peach. she was spending far too much time out at nights, giving in to alcohol for the most part. she tried not to touch any drugs, but drinking became a nightly thing. she’d perform, then spend the rest of the night partying with whoever she could find at the venue.

one night in atlanta after a particularly shaky performance, rowan found herself in a dark place and simply went into the women’s bathroom to calm down, but police say they found her laying flat on the ground, refusing to respond to anyone. she vaguely remembers the end of the manic episode, but it did land her in the emergency room for a change in mental status.

much to her chagrin, they admitted her overnight before transporting her to skyland trail, a mental health facility in atlanta. she spend about two and a half months there getting medications regulated and learning new coping mechanisms. she was discharged about two weeks ago and finally made it back to peach hollow and her apartment.

she’d lead everyone other than her family and maybe one or two other people that she was away on a musician’s retreat, but really, was in inpatient treatment.

she’s currently working full time as a make up artist at pop of peach and performing when she can, but doesn’t really go outside of peach hollow

fun facts & personality

rowan despises small talk. conversations about the weather or political climate don’t stimulate her and she gets snarky pretty easily. it isn’t that she wants to come off rude or unapproachable, but nine times out of ten, small talk is fake and she feels as though she doesn’t have the time or energy to indulge in it. ask her about the sky or some shit. she won’t shut up

she has a tendency to overshare, aside from what’s been going on in the past few months. her lips are sealed tight about that. however, she’s open to talking about her mental health and is a big advocate for erasing the stigma. this makes rowan a very good listener and a huge supportive presence for anyone struggling. she’s the mom friend, and no matter what time of day or night, if someone says they need an ear, she’ll go to them. she knows what it’s like to be alone.

despite her past and her demons, rowan finds a way to put on a smile. it might often be snarky or sarcastic, but rarely is it insincere. she’s an empath and feels everything so very deeply, but can easily put it away when necessarily.

her apartment is her safe haven. she rarely has company. it isn’t really her thing. she prefers to go to other people’s places. she has her record collection proudly displayed on her living room wall, all the plants you can imagine, incense burning whenever she’s home, and a scottish fold munchkin cat named loonette after her favorite childhood tv show, the big comfy couch. she has hopes to get another cat named molly to match. you know, because we’re all clowns !

she takes great pride in her instagram. it sounds superficial, but often times, rowan will post a good picture and then link to her next show in hopes that somebody will come based on that. while she does have a passion for make up and a second instagram for it, ultimately, she’d like for there to come a time where she can live solely on the money she makes through music

catch her driving her old ass ford focus blaring 00s alternative, mainly fuckin paramore bc she’s heart eyes for hayley williams

wanted connections if ya made it this far!!!!

childhood friends – those who she’s known since elementary school. they’ve most likely watched her go through her many trials and tribulations in class. these could be acquaintances, close friends, or even a ride or die or two.

bullies – people who fucked with her through school. it’s essential that they’re on bad terms currently, but perhaps an enemy turned friend or romantic could be fun??

group therapy pal – this would be super fun and might entail the person finding out about her secret…. msg me for deets

exes – there will be a couple of these, gender does not matter. i’d like to find one that she was dating when she went into treatment and maybe hasn’t seen/spoken to them since they’ve been back, first love, high school sweetheart?? omg possibilities are endless

flirtationship – self explanatory, gender doesn’t matter she’s pan

any other ideas literally lmk!! thanks for reading ♥

#ok.... one more time kngrdjsnh

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spacetimewraithwrites-archive · 5 years

Text

Find the Word Tag Game

Tagged by @timetravelingpigeon, I’d been wanting to do this one so bad!!

I was assigned the words true, punch, line, and pass. I’m gonna be a pain in the ass and do what I can for all three books with finished drafts, lmao. I couldn’t do some of them without spoilers, unfortunately.

Also, I’m officially tagging anyone who wants to do this, and your words are colors, warm, hold, and sleep!

True:

Thriving

Not once did it occur to Warren that he could’ve been in danger the longer he remained in Thrive’s presence. Or, more to the truth, it occurred to him but he didn’t care. He should’ve been afraid for his safety at that very moment, yet he wasn’t. He observed for several minutes the hand clenching and unclenching on Thrive’s knee, knew and understood that at any moment it could’ve found its way to his throat, or shot him out of the window like a cannon with a wave. A little curious that he hadn’t already done so. Warren supposed his true concern stemmed from that subconscious thought.

Thriving: Destiny

"The thing that killed all those people up there," Hastings said in disbelief after a few minutes, "can travel through time?" "In a manner of speaking," Thrive confirmed. "One could say they're omnipresent and omnipotent, but that may only be true to a point. I don't think they have a firm grasp of where and when they are at any one time, nor do I think their control over time is as precise as they would like." "Which is probably why they haven't already screwed us five times over," Warren said.

More Under the Cut!

Punch:

Thriving

Esther looked at Thrive in the rearview mirror, clearing her throat. “Warren taught you ‘I, Spy,’ huh? I could teach you something else. Maybe ‘Punch Buggy.’ That one’s been around forever, too. Whenever you see a Volkswagen Beetle, you punch someone on the arm and declare the color of the car. Like…’yellow’ or something,” she said, knocking her fist into Warren’s shoulder to demonstrate. “I see,” Thrive said. “It would possibly be more effective if I understood any of the words you just said.”

Thriving: Destiny

"I could've handled him myself," he said to Thrive, who entered the hallway before him. "Not that I didn't enjoy the hell out of that...maybe a little too much, actually." “This may come as a surprise to you, but Director Hastings is very much like the Leaders I've encountered back home. Less intelligent, however. Dealing with him is cathartic." "I never thought I'd hear anyone tell me that interacting with Hastings is cathartic," Warren said. "Although...punching him in the face felt pretty damn good, so maybe you're right."

Thriving: Rebirth

There was a pause. Thrive took a step back in shock. "...Armatax." The familiar nuaclan Rotanga sprang back up to his feet and unsheathed his signature staff from his back, extending it to its full length with a snap in the air. Without another word he charged, and Thrive raised a shield as he was met with a barrage of melee attacks until he was able to find a break to punch Armatax square in the jaw.

Line:

Thriving

He operated on autopilot from that moment on. He found himself struggling to crawl away from the firefight ahead of him, and camouflaged streaks ran around, causing sparks, guns popping around his head. Somehow he managed to find a gathering of bushes but only made it halfway there before his arms could no longer drag him. As he fell to his elbow at the cap of a long line of blood-stained snow, true panic set in. His limbs grew colder and then numb as the seconds marched forward, and he was a little unsurprised to discover that when faced with death once more, he would much rather walk away from it.

Thriving: Destiny

He began to second-guess his decision to leave Earth. Watching Sussa place a gentle hand on the small of Thrive's back was ten times worse than being imprisoned in a cabin in the middle of the woods. Armatax stepped into his line of vision, glancing from them to him and back again. "Small human is upset." "No shit," Warren said. "I can't really talk about it now." "Do you think I am stupid?" Warren narrowed his eyes. "I don't, actually…." Armatax turned to give the other two one last pointed look. Warren paused. "Is it that fucking obvious?" "I am not stupid," Armatax said. "Great." Warren hung his head between his knees. "That makes one of us."

Thriving: Rebirth

Warren swallowed. "You can't say shit like that and expect me not to come to the worst ever conclusions." "Please trust me," Thrive murmured. "When the time is right, you have my word." "Just tell me if it involves your health, or my health, or anyone's health in any way." "Nobody is dying, Warren." He moved over to him, placing a firm hand on his shoulder. "That is a line I wouldn't cross."

Pass:

Thriving: Destiny

"You can take on a Foremaster and a Headmaster with your bare hands, but you're afraid of this ratty-ass, honey-badger-lookin' motherfucker?" "Consider the fact that there are animals in the universe that, if they bite or are touched, can inject deadly toxins into the body that would render even me completely useless or dead." "Look...I'm sorry I made you break your oath but honestly, you shoulda just let me fight you." "Despite the near-impossible stipulation of you having to kill me, I'm beginning to think that would've been the better option." Thrive peered into the doorway again. "It's moved on. If we're careful, we may be able to pass it."

Thriving: Rebirth

Warren tiptoed into the room, moving silently to the desk. A message contrasted in bright white against the navy blue background, unfinished. Part of Thrive's elbow blocked the writing but it could be inferred. To the attention of Mr. Kyron Sympa— My name is Orthrive'poliea, and I am so sorry I failed your son. Warren's heart clenched. He stared at the words for a few moments before looking at Thrive again. He kneeled down beside his sleeping form, reaching out to touch his back before ultimately deciding he didn't want to risk waking him. How exhausted he had to have been to pass out in the middle of work like that. Warren leaned his forehead on the edge of the desk and sighed deeply. "Shit," he whispered.

#tag game #this took me forever but I loved every minute of it

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bethesdaglitch · 5 years

Note

1-70 do em all! 😁💙

I’m seriously so sorry this took so long, but it was so much fun!! thank you!!! Also it’s super long so I’m gonna put it under a readmore!

1. First game you played obsessively?

Jak & Daxter! 2. A game that has influenced you creatively? Writing, drawing, etc.Lmao I’m not exactly a creative person, but when I was little I tried coming up with and drawing my own pokemon. They were… bad3. Who did you play with as a kid?My brother! At first I stole his Gameboy Color whenever he wasn’t using it, but then he saved up and bought a PS2 so we could play games together4. Who do you play with now?No one really lol. I kinda prefer to play single-player games now? But I’ll play with various friends when we hang out.5. Ever use cheat codes?When I was little, yeah! Especially in the Sly Raccoon games 6. Ever buy strategy guides?Before the age of unlimited free online strategy guides I did, now I just use said online ones7. Any games you have multiple copies of?Yep, I’ve “lost” games only to find them again after replacing them like… four times? It happened with Oblivion, Fable 3, DA: Origins, and, weirdly enough, that one obscure (but fun imo!) wii game, Fragile Dreams: Farewell Ruins of the Moon8. Rarest/Most expensive game in your collection?This one was hard! After a teeny bit of research, I narrowed it down to either Rule of Rose, LoZ Collector’s Edition on Gamecube, and pokemon red and yellow9. Most regrettable purchase?Hhhhhhhh I bought the video game for the 2006 Dreamworks movie Over the Hedge. I was only 12, but I still should’ve known better :(10. Ever go to a midnight game release or stand in line for hours?I’ve gone to a few midnight releases, but none that have lasted for hours, luckily. I only started going to them in the last few years, so the only ones I’ve been to so far are Fallout 4, DA:I and uh… ME:A (I KNOW)11. Have you ever made new friends from playing video games?Nah not really, I don’t play online games, so. I have friends who play video games, but I’ve never met someone BECAUSE of video games12. Ever get picked on for liking games?Lol no?13. A game you’ve never played that everyone else has?Overwatch14. Favorite game music?NIER, hands down. 15. If it was a requirement to get a game related tattoo, what would you pick?Probably something cute and harmless like the leaf from Animal Crossing lol16. Favorite game to play with your friends IRL?Lately we’ve been really into Towerfall: Ascension and Screencheat17. Ever lose a friend over a game?Wh—no????18. Would you date someone that hates gaming?So long as they didn’t try to “forbid” me from playing and so long as we had other interests to bond over, then sure. It’d be kind of a bummer though lol19. Favorite handheld console?Idk that I have one! Maybe the Switch, since that’s the most recent and popular?20. Game that you know like the back of your hand?Silent Hill 3 and DA:I21. Game that you didn’t like or understand as a kid but love now?The Civilization games22. Do you wear game related clothing/accessories?Sometimes, yeah. Nothing too embarrassing, though. 23. The game that you’ve logged the most hours into?What, like… ever?? Geez, I dunno… probably Oblivion?24. First Pokemon game?Yellow!25. Were you ever an arcade game player?I actually wasn’t really :/26. Ever form any gaming rivalries?Oh yeah, with my brother. He’s 6 years older than me, which pretty much guaranteed I got my ass kicked in every game we played when I was younger27. Game that makes you rage?Bloodborne and Dark Souls!!!!!! I swear I try to go back and play them at least once a year, and I can never get past the first hour :(28. Ever play in a tournament?Not like an official one, but ones with friends, yep29. What is your gaming set up?Imma be real with you chief I don’t know nearly enough about computers to answer this question with anything other than “a computer”30. How many consoles do you own?Ohohoho far too many31. Does the 3DS and/or Virtual Boy hurt your eyes or give you headaches?I’ve never had the 3D slider up long enough to tell, but that probably means yes lol32. Did you ever play a game based on your favorite show/cartoon/movie/comic?BOY when I was in first grade I played Spongebob: Supersponge on Gameboy advance so much I STILL remember the password that lets you skip to the final stage (it’s WMBT) 33. Did you ever have any bootleg games or plug-n-play games?nah 34. Do either of your parents play video games?PFFF GOD NO. Although my mom does love Animal Crossing. Not playing it, but just like it’s whole deal. 35. Ever work in a game store? Or do you have a favorite game shop?No and no, tbh36. Have you ever shed actual blood, sweat or tears over a game?I… don’t think so? Maybe I’ve cried over a game, but blood?? Put the controller down, y’all37. Have you played E.T. for the Atari 2600? Do you think that’s the worst game ever, or do you have another nomination?NO NO NO OVER THE HEDGE (2006) FOR THE PS2 IS THE SINGLE WORST GAME EVER MADE FIGHT ME ON THIS38. A game you’re ashamed to admit that you like?Oh lord… idk if anyone’s ever played any of Ambition’s dating sims (Dream Girlfriend, Dream Boyfriend, Animal Boyfriend, and Moe Can Change) but I’ve literally been playing them for about… 5-ish years now? They’re seriously the worst, I fucking love them 39. A sequel that you would die for them to make?Hmm… Maybe a new Kingdoms of Amalur game would be cool? 40. What to you think of virtual reality headsets or motion controls?I love VR but the last time I tried it at a friend’s place I fucking faceplanted after leaning on a counter I forgot was also virtual and the first thing my friend asked was whether the headset was ok, so that stung. As for motion controls, they’re fun but they can be a real pain41. A genre that you just can’t get into?Sports games 42. Maybe it wasn’t your first game, but what was the game that started you on your path to nerdiness?The path to what43. Ever play games when you really should have been concentrating on something else?Oh yeah, who hasn’t?44. Arcade machine that has consumed the most of your quarters?Idk if this counts but I am a MASTER at the claw machine and that stacker game. My closet is full of useless shit I’ve won from those things45. How are you at Mario Kart?OH SO FUCKING GOOD YOU HAVE NO IDEA46. Do you like relaxing games like Animal Crossing or Harvest Moon?yesssss I love them47. Do you like competitive games?I mean like I said, I mostly prefer single-player games, but I do enjoy the occasional co-op game48. How long does it take your to customize your player character?about an hour49. In games where you can pick your class, do you always tend to go for the same type of character?I actually don’t! If it’s a game I’m not confident I’ll be good at, I pick whichever class is recommended for beginners, and that changes from game to game. Alternatively, I just go through phases where I prefer a specific class above others 50. If you were a game designer, what masterpiece would you create?Christ I have no idea. Maybe a first-person escape game? idk51. Have you ever played a game for so long that you forgot to eat or sleep?NO?? DAMN ARE Y’ALL OK????52. A game that you begged your parents for as a kid?Literally any M game; my parents were strictly “No M games until you’re old enough!” I just got my brother to buy them most of the time though lol53. What’s your opinion on DLC these days?Most DLC is fine, it’s microtransactions in “pay-to-win” games that I fucking hate. 54. Do you give in to Steam sales?HAHAHAHAHA yeah absolutely 55. Did you ever make someone you hated in the Sims and did mean stuff to them?N-No??? 56. Did you ever play Roller Coaster Tycoon and kill off your guests?Ok yeah I did do that 57. Did you ever play a game to 100% or get all of the achievements?Ew no58. If you can only play 3 games for the rest of your life, which ones do you pick?Ooooh… ok, Oblivion, My Time in Portia, and Divinity 259. Do you play any cell phone games?I do! I play a lot of escape games, and uh… the Ambition games mentioned previously60. Do you know the Konami Code?Is that the up-up-down-down-left-right-left-right-B-A? Huh, I never knew it had a name!61. Do you trade in your games or keep them forever?I used to trade them in occasionally, but mostly I keep them 62. Ever buy a console specifically to play one game?Yeah the Switch for BotW. Not proud of it, but it was worth it63. Ever go to a gaming convention or tournament? nah64. Ever make a TV or monitor purchase based on what would be best for gaming?Yep! 65. Ever have a Game Genie, Game Shark or Action Replay? Did it ever mess up your game’s save file?OHHHH MY GOD YEAH, I’M STILL FUCKING PISSED ABOUT IT. I had GameShark for Gameboy and PS2, but that one was fine, it didn’t cause any problems. It was ACTION FUCKING REPLAY that fucked me over. I used it for KH2 and it worked the whole time until literally THE VERY LAST XEMNAS FIGHT, when my HP bar suddenly dropped to 1??? Not my HP, mind you, the HP BAR. Meaning 1 HP was the most I could have. Literally fuck action replay >:( 66. Did you ever have have an old Nokia with Snake on it?nope67. Do you have a happy gaming-related childhood memory you want to share?I do! The very first thing I ever saved up money for to buy myself was Pokemon Crystal version. Until then I’d just been borrowing (re:stealing) my brother’s, but when I was 5 and Crystal was about to come out, my parents made me a deal that if I saved up $15, they’d pay the other $15 and I could get it! It was the first time I was working towards a fun goal, so it was all pretty exciting for 5-year-old me lol. It’s dumb, I know, but it’s something I look back on fondly68. Ever save up a ton of tickets in an arcade to get something cool?Lol nah, I think the best thing I ever got with tickets was a cheap snowglobe 69. In your opinion, best game ever made? UHHHH GOD. That’s… super tough. I’m genuinely not sure I have an answer tbh. I’m really into Divinity 2 right now but best game ever made?? Idk! that’s a hard one!!!! 70. Very first game you ever beat? I won’t lie, it was Spongebob: Supersponge on GBA

#ask meme #sorthyboy

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beforethebraces · 6 years

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Sixth Times the Charm; (2)

(credit to the original creator who gif'ed this! if this is you, please come forward so I can credit you properly! :)

tw: swearing, carnival booths, stuffed animals, etc.

Summary: Moment 1 created 5 other opportunities for them to meet again which means there’s six different viewpoints for each chance that happened between them. What exactly happened? Is the universe rooting for them to be together? Is it really just a coincidence if it happened more than once? You decide.

Pairing: Calum + Y/N

A/N: thank you so much for reading part 1 and for waiting patiently as I typed and posted this part down! I also didn’t really know if you guys would like it but with the amount of love and support for this mini-series, it makes me feel really happy and I appreciate all of you for giving this a chance! :’) the next 4 moments before the 6th one will suuuck, depending on how you decide to see it so I hope you’ll guys still read this until then, lol. but without further adieu, here’s part 2! :D

also, thank you to @awkwarddezzy for editing this slightly! we all tried our best here lmao.

Key: Y/d/n = your dad’s name

Other parts: part 1

*** carnival worker

Damn it, I should’ve said no. If I said no, I wouldn’t be working here right now. If I said no, I’d be enjoying my day off, watching movies with my girlfriend or visiting my family doing god knows what. But I had to say yes. My boss wasn't taking no for an answer. I should’ve reported him, but that’s a lot of extra work than I really needed at the moment. Besides, he doesn't have enough workers to fire if he wanted to; he’s understaffed as it is. There’s a part of me that felt bad for being a dick to him, though that sympathy in me vanished the minute he was being an asshole. Whatever, right? I need the money.

"You really need to smile more, Nio. Are you trying to scare away the customers?” someone mocked. As I glanced towards my right, I saw Leina; my coworker, leaning against the wooden pole as her arms were crossed in front of her, staring at me with an amused grin. “I mean, I think you scared away a little girl with your grouchiness and all she could’ve wanted was a unicorn.”

“If she wanted to have a unicorn, she’d have to have a really good aim to knock over 3 bottles to win. Besides, Charlie has this." I retorted. Charlie was, in fact, dealing with a young boy and his sister. “Still... be a little more excited. It doesn’t hurt to actually fake a smile.”

“Alright, fine sunshine. I’ll give you a smile.” Showing her my million dollar grin, she paused and shook her head.

“It looks like you're constipated.”

Frowning at her choice of words, she then tells me about the families and people she encountered over the evening while we were both working. She kept squealing over the fact that some of the kids were cute and how the couples were cuter. She’s such a girl. “Hey, Antonio-”

“Jesus Charlie, how many times do I have to tell you to call me Nio? Antonio is weird.” I groaned and rolled my eyes, making Leina giggle as I slyly gave her my middle finger. “Not enough, you nerd. Can you deal with this young boy and his sister? I have to go on a potty break.”

“Ooh, Stuart won’t like that,” I teased as he too rolled his eyes at me. “Stuart can either let me use the restroom or I’ll piss my pants in front of the customers and make it a low turn-out rate.”

“Fine, go before I change my mind and send the people my way.” As he rushed towards the two customers to explain the situation, Leina reminded me to be nice. As if I needed that reminder. “Thanks, but I think I can behave myself. Trust me.” Noticing the older girl and her brother come my way, I put on my best smile as the girl returned the gesture.

“Do I have to pay again since the other guy left?”

“Not if you haven’t thrown the ball yet.”

“I didn’t.”

“Then go right ahead!” I responded as I gave her the ball. Watching her grab it and preparing herself for the throw, she swung her arm back as I watch the ball knock over the bottles. Holy shit.

“So what prize-”

“I want the blue bear!” Handing her the small blue bear she won, her brother (who was holding the other bears she accumulated), looked at her in boredom. “Come on Mali, you trying to win the bigger bear is going to take awhile. Can I please put these down and do my own thing?” Watching him complain about their situation made me chuckle as this Mali girl blushed. Noticing the glare she gave her brother, Leina tapped my shoulder. She mouthed the words, ‘innocent schoolgirl crush’, making me shake my head in disapproval. She looked 14: way too young for me. I'm 21. Besides, I have a girlfriend.

‘Calum, shut up! You’re only 9 but fine! If mom or dad blames me for you getting lost, I will not talk to you for the rest of the month!’ Seeing Calum grin widely as he handed her back her stuffed animals, I made sure he ran off to somewhere safe, laughing at the fact he bumped into a girl who gave him the stink eye at the back of his head. Kids these days. It must feel nice to be young and away from all these responsibilities.

“Can I switch these 9 bears for the medium sized one?”

***

It has been a total of 34 minutes and Mali was still here, almost winning the grand prize. Charlie came back from the restroom a while ago and decided to let me handle her as he dealt with another family. Mali’s mom had also found her ten minutes after Calum left and to say this girl had a fan is an understatement.

‘Dad! Look at how many bears she has! Do you think I can be like her?’ I heard a girl ask her father, glancing towards Charlie’s direction. It was the family he was dealing with and it was the same girl Calum bumped into earlier when he left. ‘Of course Y/n! You got this!’

Snapping out of my daze, Leina looked at me with concern as I mouthed to her that I was fine. She nodded warily as Mali’s mom shouted in joy! (a/n: no pun intended lmao) “Just 3 more bears darling and you can get the big one!” Spotting Calum a foot away from them with what I assume is his dad, he was glancing at this Y/n girl with curiosity and wonder in his eyes. Shivers go down my spine as if I was supposed to witness this interaction. This should’ve been Leina’s forte; this was her thing anyway. Noting that Y/n threw the ball and only got the top bottle down, Charlie cheered for her in encouragement.

“Why don’t you help her out, Mali? She looks like she really wants that unicorn!” As Mali walked towards the girl and her dad with a shy smile on her face, Calum and his dad marched their way over to his mom as she filled the boys in. “Don’t worry David, Mali just needs about 3 more bears to switch for the medium one and then switch out her other 4 medium bears for the large one. She’s helping the other girl out because she wanted to be nice.”

Feeling a tap on my shoulder, I see Leina with her heart eyes on.

Oh no.

“Nio, this is too cute! The boy keeps looking at her!” She whispered quietly, gazing at Calum and Y/n with adoration in her eyes. I had to push her out of her trance before anyone could see her being creepy about it. She didn’t need this right now. “If he could just approach her instead of staring at her, we can actually a witness a cute love story between-”

“Two kids. I know what you’re going to say, so can you stop creeping on them? This will look weird to other people who are staring at you!” I retaliated as she stuck her tongue at me. Why is she so weird?

‘Mom, I thought you told us not to talk to strangers!’

“Cal, don’t worry. They seem like good people. Your dad and I are right here making sure nothing happens to her which I doubt.” With everyone watching the exchange between Mali and Y/n, Y/n throws the ball once again. This time, she knocks off 2 out of 3 bottles.

‘See? You’re getting better! Keep doing that and you’ll eventually knock all of them down!’ Mali encouraged before making her way back in front of me. Handed another quarter in payment, I gave her the ball as Calum and Mali engage in a short conversation. Spotting Y/n glance in our direction out of the corner of my eyes, I also heard Leina squeal, whispering to me about how Y/n was staring at Calum this time and how it was a missed connection.

“Yes! Two more bears!”

***

Five more minutes have passed and Mali FINALLY won the giant bear she was working hard to get. Thank god. As happy as I am about how her hard work paid off, I was also happy I’d be dealing with someone else once she and her family had left. I asked Charlie to give them the bear and as he did that, I walked over to Y/n and her dad, almost being hit by the ball she flung. “Oh no! I’m sorry!” Y/n yelped, her dad laughing at my expense. How nice of him to do so. Hearing the bottles getting knocked down, I heard her dad yell in excitement.

“Woo! You did it, baby!” He exclaimed as she looked at me in surprise. Offering her a grin, she told me she wanted the purple unicorn, saying something about how it’s a magic horse with a pointy horn. Not that it surprised me of course. After I handed her prize, I see Mali smiling at her as a sort of congratulations for winning too. Y/n grabbed her dad’s arm and what shocked me was that Calum gave her a thumbs up with a sort of twinkle in his eyes, which made her blush shyly and gaze up her at dad as if she was trying to distract herself from what had happened. With Calum and his family walking away, Y/n stared at the back of his head, smiling before walking away with her dad as well.

“Adorable kids aren’t they? This is why I love working here sometimes. Seeing the smiles and hope on their face when they win makes my shift worthwhile!” Charlie announced as I groaned and rubbed my head. He's like another Leina, speaking of which- “Do you think they’ll see each other again and say hi to each other and have a cute childhood romance? She looked about his age, maybe a year or two younger. I don’t know about you, but I got goosebumps!” She blurted out as Charlie snorted in agreement.

“Hate to be the bearer of bad news but even if the carnival is big enough and they’re bound to cross paths again, this is not like the romance novels you read on your spare time! This is real life-”

“Oh, you’re such a negative Nancy, Nio. Just let me ship people freely without you judging me!” She giggled as Charlie patted my shoulder, alerting me that someone else wants to play. ‘A few more hours until your shift is over Antonio; then you can get away from all this crazy and be with your girlfriend.’ I repeated to myself, wanting nothing more but to be anywhere but here knowing Leina and Charlie are going to be talking about this. I really should’ve said no to Stuart. Fuck him for making me come to work on this weird day.

***

A/N: so you’ve reached the end of part 2! that was a bit of a doozy right? Calum and Y/n didn’t have much interaction (they didn’t even talk!) but it serves a purpose for this one and the next moments so get ready for the subtleties and missed opportunities (stated as such in the summary) lolol. pls leave a review and let me know what you thought or liked so far (ignoring any errors or mistakes you’ve seen)! sCREAM at me if needed to, I don’t mind! xD I just :’) let’s all be a Leina and fangirl together xD

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angewrites · 7 years

Text

Interference

Title: Interference

Title Definition: (n) The ability of two waves passing through each other to mingle, reinforcing each other where crests coincide and cancelling each other out where crests and troughs coincide.

Anime: Yu-Gi-Oh! 5D’s

Words: 5844

Summary: With Yusei and Jack gone to Nazca lines, Aki struggles to understand her physics homework. With a test coming up the next day, she calls Crow to ask for help and, to her surprise, he agrees to help her. But, as it turns out, physics isn’t the only thing she’s confused about. Also, it happens to be her birthday. Aki’s POV, Firebirdshipping (Izayoi Aki x Crow Hogan-sama)

Notes: It’s August 16th in Japan, which means it’s Aki’s birthday!! I’ve been working on, reworking, and editing at least ten times this fic for 8 days (I even used my high school physics notes for this lmao). And honestly, I’m in love with how this turned out. I was even thinking about it in my sleep lmao.

Anyway, this is the first time in a long loooong time I’ve written romance of this caliber, so if y’all got suggestions, I’m all eyes. But, even if you don’t, please let me know what you think of this b/c I’ve been dying to publish this since yesterday haha.

Happy reading!!

[FFN] [AO3]

Izayoi Residence

If I had to choose between fighting a worldwide threat and a physics test, I’d opt for the worldwide threat. Getting a diploma didn’t depend on how well I fought it. Better yet, I’d rather be in a cheesy, poorly-written high school romance (my least favorite type of romance movie) and pretend to take a physics test rather than actually take one. It’s ridiculous. Why was Duel Academy still holding classes? The rest of the city’s in shambles from Yusei’s fight with that Yliaster guy. It didn’t make any sense.

I opened my purple physics notebook as slowly as I possibly could. The test’s still happening, no matter how much I complained, hoping it would go away. We’d been studying a unit that had flown over my head since day one. I’ve tried talking with Mr. Kimura about my frustrations, but back-to-back staff meetings conveniently interrupted the explanation sessions, so I was at a total loss. Yusei had been helping me as much as he could before the World Riding Grand Prix. Eventually, preparations took over. I still didn’t understand.

And the test’s tomorrow.

And the test’s worth half our grade.

And it’s my worst class.

And I couldn’t exactly sing a musical number and hoped everything would turn out fine by the end.

How I envisioned spending the night of my 17th birthday? Not even close.

I exhaled and glanced out my window. The sun was setting over the horizon, painting the sky with a light bluish orange. Maybe he’s not too busy and he could help.

Wait a sec. He visited the kids after his job, didn’t he? I doubted he would want to waste his free time helping me with physics.

But, I didn’t have many options. My parents were away on a trip for the next two days and I couldn’t possibly bother them. It’s unlikely they’d understand the material enough to help me, even if I did. I couldn’t ask my other school friends either because none of them understood the stuff.

And I didn’t even have Bruno’s number.

I was desperate for help. Nothing was making sense.

I called Crow before I could change my mind.

When the heavy diiiiiiiing-dong sound of the doorbell reached my ears during my futile attempts to understand wave motion and interference, I glanced at my rose-shaped clock. 20:00. Exactly. If it was Crow, hmph. Some nerve he had to show up an hour late. Who did he think he was, the sloppy sidekick friend always showing up with coffee? I went down the carpeted stairs and opened the door.

There he was, standing there scratching the back of his head, which he always did when he did something he shouldn’t have done, his spiky orange hair as disheveled as ever. The words slipped out like venom before I had a chance to think.

“You sure took your sweet time, Crow.”

He stopped scratching his head. I bit down on my bottom lip, tasting the remainder of my cherry-flavored chapstick, wishing to take back those words. The tension was thick enough to be suffocating, so I opened my mouth to offer a quick “Sorry,” but Crow laughed before I could even get a breath in.

“Yeah, I did. It’s for a good reason, trust me,” he said. He placed a calming hand on my shoulder, a familiar gesture yet so unusual at that moment. “Before that, though, you need help in physics, right?”

I nodded, noting Crow had placed a hand protectively over one of his jacket pockets – the left one. He was wearing his bright yellow Blackbird Delivery jacket. He must’ve come straight from work.

He shrugged his shoulders, smiling. “I guess I know a thing or two about that. I’ll do my best.”

We made our way up the stairs to my room, Crow taking longer than I was. That’s right. It’s the first time he’s ever been to my house. Not only that, but he’s also the first friend to come over. He was shocked by how fancy everything was, from the vases to the floral wallpaper to the Renaissance paintings my father collected, bought, was given to on his business trips.

Things Crow normally didn’t see on his side of town.

Although I lived here, at that moment, I felt a tinge of embarrassment. I swallowed hard, managing to say, “My room’s this way.”

Crow made one last look at one of the paintings before shrugging his shoulders and trekking up the stairs. I took a seat, the unfamiliar and confusing wave motion and interference notes and formulas glaring at me from on top of my desk. He took his place next to me, glancing at my notes.

“Ya gotta understand this by tomorrow?” He grabbed the purple spiral notebook from on top of my writing desk to have a better look, I guessed.

“Yeah. A huge test. A nice chunk of my final grade, no less,” I replied, crossing my legs and arms. “But, I don’t get any of it and neither do any of my friends at school.”

“Mhmmmm,” Crow replied, looking intently at my notes, trying to decipher them. I didn’t exactly have the best handwriting, so I didn’t blame him for struggling. Still, if he had that much trouble figuring it out, he could’ve asked me, for goodness’ sake.

“If you can’t read my handwriting, just tell me,” I spoke up, leaning back in my cushioned chair.

“No, it’s not that,” he corrected. “It’s just . . . this is so easy. Even Jack could figure this out.”

“Really, Crow? That’s not very helpful,” I scoffed, holding myself tighter.

Crow must’ve realized why I was suddenly so rattled.

“Woah, my bad. I can help you with this, though. It’s not hard. You just need to take it one piece at a time.”

“One piece at a time, huh?” I muttered, taking the notes from his hands.

“Yeah, let me show you,” he said, moving to behind my chair and extending an arm towards my notes. He pointed at various formulas and terms in a sequence. While that was my learning style, I was unable to focus. His covered-by-his-work-jacket arm was just centimeters away from my bare arm. My heartrate accelerated, a wave of nervousness overwhelming me. The hairs in the back of my neck stood up and I broke out in a cold sweat.

All because of an arm.

Whenever that happened to other characters in a romantic comedy, I’d always cheer for the one feeling overwhelmed to get with the guy or girl already . . . which was then followed by an hour and a half of them trying to get together, misunderstandings and all. It was annoying when I thought back on the movie, but I fell for it as it was happening. Every. Time. They got together at the end, so what did it matter?

I didn’t think that would ever happen to me. But, it didn’t make sense for it to happen either since Crow’s only a friend. He definitely thought of me as just a friend too.

I was sure of it . . . I guess.

Crow was trying his best to explain interference and wave motion and all to me, but my mind and heart were making it hard to focus. They’d rather help me fully and irrevocably concentrate on another problem.

Him.

I didn’t understand at first where the attraction came from, whatever kind of attraction it was. Sure, he did drop everything he had planned, which probably included visiting the kids at Martha’s, just to help me with something he thought was simple. Before that, he even supported me after that poor performance against Team Unicorn, taking time out of the chaos to make sure I was alright. He did all of that even though he went through a lot to train me in a number of early mornings for the tournament, even though he should’ve been focusing on his arm recovering.

And, okay, okay, he wasn’t half-bad looking either – even with all the markers on his face. He was actually kinda cute.

But, that didn’t mean I liked him like. Like that. That was ridiculous. Crow was just a super good friend I could laugh with. I could improve my skills as a D-Wheeler with. I could practice my dueling skills against.

That’s all he was. A friend.

“So, you got that?”

Crow’s voice forces me back to the original problem – the interference problem. I turned against my will to face him.

A sensation overwhelmed me.

It was a strange sensation. It wasn’t like when I first met Divine, when I had felt acceptance – it was a false one, but it made me feel I had belonged. I wasn’t an outcast or a monster to the people in the Arcadia Movement. I was powerful, I was strong, I was feared. There were people who looked up to me. They accepted me for who I was because of him. Divine - a typhoon engulfing me, violently lashing out at anyone who dared to come close under the guise of protecting me.

It wasn’t like when I had first met Yusei either. Even though I was afraid when I met him – something about his demeanor had given me chills and he had been so bold in his convictions – those feelings gave way to warmth. Light shrouded in darkness, but it persistently shone through till the darkness dispelled. Its warmth gave me courage to change, face my problems head on, to think for myself. And I gravitated towards it, fell head over heels for it. For him.

This sensation with Crow was . . . different. Vastly different.

I found myself staring at Crow’s lips in typical romantic comedy movie fashion. “M-Mhm.”

“Uh, Aki, my eyes’re up here,” he said, half-concern, half-“what the hell are you doing?”

I felt my cheeks flush a little and prayed they didn’t appear red as my frilly sleeveless blouse. I held myself tighter in my arms and legs crossed position. Ugh, how embarrassing.

“I got that!” I retorted.

Crow only laughed, clearly comfortable at that point with the harsh way I would accidentally tell him things, and he said, “No big deal. Let’s just go over it again to make sure you really do understand it, though, ‘kay?”

It wasn’t dramatic in the slightest, but the sensation was still something extraordinary. It was a longing, yearning. Yearning to just be myself and to be myself with him. And stay with him, long after this tutoring session was over.

What in the world was this feeling?

“Okay,” I responded, silently praying I pay attention this time to physics. I needed to pass the test, after all. That ear-to-ear smile he gave wasn’t helping with that, though. Nor were my heart and nerves. I swallowed hard and sat with my back aligned with my chair, as if doing so would return my feelings to normal.

They didn’t.

I was, however more alert and willing to finally knock down the physics wall as Crow re-explained the connection between wave motion and interference. The passion with how he was explaining something that was simple to him captivated me. He somehow related wave motion and interference to D-Wheels and Riding Duels, two things I felt vastly inexperienced in but certainly knew more about.

“So, kinda like how a Riding Duel tournament is just a bunch of duelists with D-Wheels coming together, periodic waves are basically multiple pulse waves. The periodic waves are the tournament, the pulse waves are the people,” he mentioned as we neared the last problem. “Might be a stretch, but that’s how I’m seeing it.” Crow scratched his head.

“No, this makes perfect sense,” I replied, writing down the comparison so I could remember it. “I wish my teacher had explained it like this in class.”

“Heh. There’s only so much those teachers can do, huh? Might be worth it to just go to a class and see how much I know.”

I sighed, but then I laughed at the possibility. It was hard enough to imagine Crow in any school setting, real or fabricated, much less a high school, or, even worse yet, a university.

“You’d get kicked out, for sure,” I said, finishing up my writing.

Crow harrumphed. “This is payback for the Jack comment, isn’t it?”

I gave a small smile. “Maybe.”

By the time I felt I fully understood the concepts for the test the next day, it was already 21:30. I stretched my arms, relieving the tension physics placed on me. While it felt fantastic to have finally figured out my physics problems, there’s still one problem left I needed to solve. Well, two problems, but they involved the same person. And I had hoped to solve them by the end of tonight.

“That’s all I can do for now,” The Problem himself announced. “Hopefully, that helped.”

“It did. Thanks a million, Crow,” I replied. “By the way, you were going to tell me why you were late today. That’s what you said earlier, right?”

Crow nervously laughed, which I thought was odd. “Okay, yeah, ya got me. Like I said, though, it’s for a good reason. I had to do something for your birthday and all.” He reached into one of his pockets – the pocket he had been protectively placing his hand over the entire time – and pulled out a small black plastic bag.

“I know it’s not much, but it’s all I could manage, given finances and all. ‘scuse the wrapping,” he said, handing it to me.

It took all I had to not let my mouth drop completely to the floor. I hastily took the black bag and pulled out a small rose keychain. It wasn’t one of those flat keychains either; it was one of those three-dimensional ones that had figurine-like quality to it.

“All those schoolbags look alike to me, even though the kids like to argue with me that they don’t, so this is to just make sure no one takes yours,” Crow said, his voice sounding triumphant.

All he could manage? Just how much did he spend on this?

“Crow . . . these aren’t cheap,” I replied. “How much money did you spend on this?”

“Happy birthday!”

“I’m serious!”

Crow waved a hand. “Don’t worry about it, Aki. Really. It didn’t cost an arm and a leg, I promise.”

“Crow . . .” I persisted.

“Okay, okay, fine. I spent a day’s work at my job on this,” he gave up, shrugging his shoulders. It was adorable – wait. “Really, don’t worry. It’s for you and that’s why I was okay with getting it.”

Just when I had him and how I felt about him figured out, he added even more problems.

Truth be told, the concern with money was just a coverup for how I felt. It’s not that I didn’t get presents for my birthday, but it’s the first time I’ve ever gotten anything on my birthday from a friend.

If that’s what Crow was.

If this had been part of a friends-to-lovers movie, it would’ve been the part that started the whole “and suddenly, the friends realized they had romantic feelings for each other” portion of the movie. But, obviously, that didn’t apply then.

. . . Yeah, it didn’t apply. Not even close. My heart kept screaming “Liar!!” at me. I ignored it.

To think that’s why he was late. It’s frustrating. I couldn’t help but smile though as I tied the present onto my black school bag. It was a nice one, but, unfortunately, all I was going to think of whenever I saw it was him.

Who was I kidding? I meant fortunately.

“I . . . I just. Thank you, Crow,” I managed to get out, trying to quell my rapid heart beating. My heart didn’t even act as unsettled as I felt then when I was around Yusei. But, why would it ever act this way around Crow?

Crow gave a thumbs up. “Don’t sweat it. But, I’ve got to go now. Got an early delivery shift tomorrow morning and a bird needs his rest.”

My heart pounded in my chest, as if the feelings it had been holding were to burst at any moment, all my emotions laid out bare for Crow to see.

“If you got any last-minute questions tomorrow, well, you know how to reach me.”

He was a friend! Nothing more. Besides, the one I liked that way was Yusei, right?

“I’ll see you later, Aki.”

. . . right?

“Yeah, see you,” I blurted out on instinct. My reason and my brain fought with my emotion and my heart on how important the problem was. Score one for emotion and heart.

Wrong. So, so wrong.

I was frozen in my chair, watching Crow walk slowly towards the stairway. He’s probably walking at a normal pace, but I wouldn’t have known. Everything with my body was hyperaware and time had slowed down. My body gave it its all trying to solve this one problem. My heart screamed, cried, pleaded for Crow to stay and reason decided to take a back seat.

I . . . I liked Yusei. I did. I thought. I didn’t know. Everything was so confusing.

I grabbed my chair by the armrests and got up, Crow getting ready to go down the stairs. I couldn’t help but stare at his lips again. Maybe. Maybe that’s the key. Maybe doing this will solve the problem and clear everything up once and for all.

I swallowed my bottom lip, the taste of the cherry-flavored chapstick long gone. It’s better I didn’t think too much about it. I needed to go with my gut feeling. That’s what those romance movies always said, anyway, if the brain and the heart wouldn’t cooperate. My gut feeling wasn’t confusing and it’s always right. My gut feeling was . . .

“Wait!”

Crow came back up the stairs, reentering my room. I sauntered in his direction as he asked, “Yeah? What’s up?”

I made sure there was some space between us. And then, when I closed my eyes, there wasn’t. Not even between our lips this time.

He wasn’t just a friend. I finally made up my mind. He was more than that.

I had intended to only for the kiss to last a half a second, if that long, because I had felt so awkward. Aaaand I might have accidentally crashed my teeth into his? Whoops. Grade for first kiss: 0. It was enough to make even a five-year-old girl cringe.

But, that sensation I had felt from him . . . it invited me in and I crashed into it headfirst . . . or lips first? Whatever. The point is I didn’t let the awkwardness get to me for longer than I thought.

Despite that, I pulled away quickly, that sense of calm giving way to worry. Like someone who trips in front of their crush near the climax of the movie, I felt a wave of nausea and anxiety. Way to go, Aki. He probably just saw you as a friend like you thought he was and you made so many presumptions. You get a failing grade in dealing with your emotions, no matter how well you did on the Physics test tomorrow. And, ugh. That first kiss was pitiful.

I stepped back, still catching my breath, my cheeks incredibly flushed. I couldn’t hide the redness and felt trapped, my emotions holding me hostage. Crow’s face was one of complete shock, his face also flushed. I didn’t blame him. I had just invaded his personal space, after all (although that arm of his clearly invaded mine, so we’re even there). I had asked him for help on physics. That moment just then, our lips touching, the kiss? Clearly more than he bargained for.

It’d be a miracle if he still wanted to talk to me. No way he, someone who’s incredibly selfless, wanted to be with someone who’s so selfish.

“A-Aki?” Crow stammered, clearly unhinged.

I turned towards the window so he wouldn’t see my face.

“I. I overstepped some boundaries there,” I responded, voice cracking. “I’m sorry.”

I expected all kinds of reactions. “Aki, what the hell?”, “Yeah, you should be sorry!”, “Don’t speak to me ever again,” followed by a door slam. It wouldn’t have been the first time Crow reacted dramatically (and rightfully) to my rash decisions. That and that’s usually what happened in the movies. So, I braced myself.

Instead, what I got was an “Aki, it’s okay.”

I dug my fingernails into my palm to keep from breaking down right then and there. “W-What does that mean? You don’t even like me like that.”

I heard his footsteps, muffled by the carpet. A soothing hand rested on my shoulder. I still couldn’t bring myself to look at him.

“It means that I’m fine. You didn’t do anything wrong,” he said, his composure having returned. “And . . . I don’t like you like that? That’s news to me.”

I stared ahead, but my defenses weakened a little bit.

“If that’s true, then - then why didn’t you tell me?” I asked. “Instead of leaving me in the dark?” I managed to hold it in, but my voice cracked a little and my eyes watered at the corners.

“Because I thought – the whole team thought the one you liked was . . . well, you know. I didn’t want to complicate things,” he admitted. “I was surprised you even called me to help you with physics. You never ask for anyone’s help other than his.”

So that’s it. The problem solver was also a problem the entire time.

“I guess . . . You’re right. I came across like that, didn’t I?” I let a few tears fall, but a smile broke out on my face. “I’m. I’m sorry, I’m just. I. I don’t know. I’m so confused. I don’t know what to do”

Crow only pulled me closer to him, his hand moving from my shoulder to my arm.

“I . . . thought I liked Yusei, but I don’t know. I just can’t understand him,” my voice became louder, “can’t get close to him. I was – I was just hoping he’d notice.”

It’s true I did like Yusei, but at that moment, I wondered. Was I attracted to him because of him or because of what he did for me?

“So, what do you want to do?”

I looked at Crow, not even bothering to hide my tears anymore.

“I mean, you did kiss me, but don’t let that hold you back. If you still plan on pursuing Yusei, I won’t stop you,” he said as he looked to his left as he said that and frowned.

Crow’s not one to lie. I knew that. But, I could easily tell when he’s undermining his true emotions. He didn’t want to hurt me, be insensitive. He knew I had liked Yusei for a while. I got that.

He really needed to be selfish for once, though. It’d be easier for me as well as for him. Especially since Yusei had yet to confess any sort of feelings for me.

Romance movies normally didn’t take this turn that I struggled with then. Sure, there were those love triangles that got on my nerves, but this wasn’t a love triangle. It was a love tug-of-war. I couldn’t rely on movies to tell me the answers to my feelings this time. I had to go with my instincts and my own feelings.

I always hated that part in the movies where the guy or girl claimed to have fallen in love with someone else, but it turned out they only fell in love with the idea of the person they wanted to be with, not the actual person. Especially in those cheeky high school dramas. Yet, it was that type of idolization that got celebrated in the movies.

I would turn off the movie as soon as I realized that’s happening because who the heck wanted to live like that? They’re just a person.

Was my longing for Yusei any different? Did I want to be with him or did I want to be with an idea of him?

In all honesty, my longing probably fell into the “falling in love with an idea” trope. He saved me from blindly accepting everything around me. He helped me understand how a D-Wheel maneuvered. But, there was something about him I couldn’t reach. Instead of trying harder or instead of doing something more productive like not doing that, I settled, hoping he would willingly open up.

Pathetic.

“No,” I said, voice trembling. “No, I’m not going to do that.”

I could hear Crow’s breathing become more ragged.

He didn’t even turn my life around like Yusei did. But, he was there for me. He was always encouraging me to become better but never asking me to change when I wasn’t ready to take that step. What really was the clincher was that I felt the need to change with Yusei just so I could measure up and get him to talk to me, somehow. Crow made me feel comfortable with myself.

Changing as a person’s important, but constantly changing without a break just for one person’s exhausting.

“Aki, you sure?” he asked, his voice a whisper. “Is it really what you want?”

“As sure as I am about at least passing my Physics test tomorrow,” I joked, turning to face him, not even caring that he saw my tears anymore. “And I’m pretty confident about that now.”

“Aki . . .”

“Also, would it hurt you to be selfish for once in your life?” I asked with a “I can’t believe you” light-hearted tone. “If you hadn’t been so selfless, not wanting to complicate things for me and all, we wouldn’t have had this problem.”

Crow laughed, his cheeks a light shade of pink.

God, he’s cute.

“Okay, okay, my bad, my bad,” he said, wiping tears from his eyes. “I guess you got me there. I’m sorry.”

After all he did for me that night, on my birthday, no less, he’s the one apologizing? He’s a mess. But, I was a mess too. At least we could both be messes together.

“Crow, it’s fine,” I murmured. I wrapped my arms around his neck, his around my waist. The two of us smiled.

“Don’t pull away this time, Aki,” he whispered.

“I won’t,” I whispered back, softly laughing.

“And try not to smash into my teeth. They’re the only ones I got.”

“Just shut up and kiss me.”

And he did. All of the romance movies I’d seen couldn’t even come close to preparing me for it because did he ever. Didn’t even give me a chance to catch my breath first.

It’s a good thing he had his arms around me.

After we let go, everything was out of focus. My room was like one of those surrealist paintings and everything’s hazy and dreamlike. My head felt incredibly light and I struggled to keep my balance, so I didn’t let go of Crow right away. He didn’t seem to mind. He was still holding me, fortunately, his arms wrapped firmly yet gently around my lower back.

“You alright?” he whispered, his voice husky. It made my heart flutter.

“Yeah, but no sudden moves, okay?” I whispered, my face pressed against his shirt.

No verbal response, but I felt a quick kiss on the top of my forehead. And another. And one that lingered a while longer. I pressed my body firmer against his, a giggle escaping my lips.

I didn’t want the moment to end.

It was true I didn’t realize Crow was the one I liked – like that – until that evening, but it was that night that made me understand how much I’d fallen for him.

How much I wanted to do annoyingly cute couple things with him like go to the movies, watch the sunset, or just hold hands.

How much I wanted to just be with him, laugh with him, be with him every step of the way.

How much I just wanted to kiss him. Over and over and over again.

How much I wanted him.

I’d thought maybe it’s just a random feeling trying to complicate how I felt about Yusei. I was wrong.

The raw, fiery, yet tender romantic feelings.

They were all for Crow.

Life outside of this room still existed, the logical and reasonable side of my brain reminded me rudely, however. I still had that test tomorrow, Crow had that early shift in the morning, and Yliaster’s still very much a threat. I let go of him and took one step back.

“It’s getting late. You should probably go,” I said.

Crow closed his eyes and sighed, a smile on his face. “Well, I did say I had that early shift, so I guess I should.” The smile was exchanged for a frown however and he opened his eyes. “You gonna be alright? Your parents’re away on a trip, you told me.”

Always the worrier. I said, “Don’t worry. The security system’s pretty good on the house. They wouldn’t want to mess with me, anyway. I’ll be fine. I’ll see you off, if you want.”

Crow looked at me for a moment as if he wanted to say – or do, maybe? – something else. He shook his head and he and I, after grabbing the housekeys, made our way towards the front door. We stepped outside, the humid and muggy air overwhelming us, where his D-Wheel, Blackbird, was waiting.

“Well, I’m off,” he announced.

“Have a safe trip back,” I said. “I’ll let you know how the test goes tomorrow. Let me know when you get back to your place.”

“I will.”

“And . . . thanks for tonight, Crow. For everything,” I said, putting the key in my back pocket.

Crow threw out a “heh” under his breath and placed his thumb under my chin and his pointer finger on it, lifting it slightly.

“C-Crow?” I stammered, fire burning in my cheeks.

“What, can’t a guy give his girlfriend a goodnight kiss?” he asked innocently.

“You taking my kissing virginity in my own room wasn’t it?” I asked innocently right back.

“That was Part One. Or Part Two, if you count the one you nearly knocked out my teeth as Part One.”

“I said I was sorry.” I pouted.

“You did, so I’m counting it. So . . . think of this as Part Three.” He moved his thumb lightly over my lips, his other hand finding its way to where band of my white shorts was and pushing me forward until the only space between us was between our lips. My heart raced, butterflies fluttering about wildly in my stomach, not out of nervousness. No, not even close.

It was excitement and passion.

It was.

It was love.

No other words needed to be said between us. The last kiss, the last tender . . . slightly noisier moment we shared that night said everything else.

It was a good thing the Izayoi family didn’t have neighbors.

It was even a better thing I put the housekey in my back pocket.

Because I would’ve dropped it.

I watch as Crow drove to the main street, his D-Wheel disappearing from view. I unlock the door to the house, making my way towards my room again. It feels weird being here by myself after having been held, but . . . it’s a good kind of weird.

I glance at my physics notebook. What had looked like confusing terms and formulas actually makes sense to me now. If I just went over it before the test the next day, I’ll be good to go. My friends are certainly going to appreciate it, since no doubt they’ll ask me for advice. To think just looking at it used to give me a headache. To think those were the only problems I thought needed solving. How quickly things can change, huh?

I stretch and start getting ready for bed. I put on my loose-fitting pink pajamas – a long sleeved shirt and shorts – and brush my teeth. I let my hair hang completely loose when my phone wildly buzzed. Three text messages: one from Papa, one from Yusei, and one from Crow.

Papa wants to make sure I was okay with being home alone for one more night and he and Mama are sorry they couldn’t be there for my birthday this year. On other years, I would’ve been incredibly bothered, but I don’t mind this time around. I tell him that. I didn’t tell him why, of course and for obvious reasons relating to why I was glad we didn’t have neighbors.

But, naturally, he’s curious as to why, since it’s the first time I’ve ever said that about them being gone. I’m hesitant to answer since Papa and Mama are both convinced somehow Yusei’s my future husband. But, I have to tell them sometime – just not over text. So, I reply, “It’s a lot for just a text. I’ll just tell you when you two get back.”

Yusei texted saying he and Jack would be back in Japan momentarily. I stare at the text for a good moment, processing that this was the guy I used to be head over heels for. I respond back with a “see you soon!”, being grateful I’ve finally figured out how I feel about him. A load had been swiftly lifted from my shoulders.

Crow actually remembered somehow in that kissing-obsessed brain of his and let me know that he got home safe, but Bruno kept asking a lot of questions and that took some time. I laugh at that one. But, the second part of the text made me tear up a little. Okay, maybe slightly more than a little. Okay, actually a lot.

“Make sure you get plenty of sleep, Aki. And good luck tomorrow! I love you!”

I wipe the tears from my eyes. As a child, I always wanted my life to be like a romance genre movie, if only I’d be happy for a day or two. I wanted someone to tell me they love me, to hold me close and say everything will be fine. That was it.

But, what just happened on my seventeenth birthday, awkward moments and breakdowns and all, was so much better than any romance movie. It’s the best present ever. And the best part was I’d be with him for more than two days. Replaying the evening’s events in my mind, I gently trace over my lips with my finger. They’ve been through a lot, especially without chapstick. In a good way.

I’d still take fighting a worldwide threat over a physics test, but if I had to take the test instead, I wouldn’t mind it.

“I love you too, Crow.”

#yugioh 5ds #crow hogan #izayoi aki #firebirdshipping #8/16/17

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rowanfoster · 4 years

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{ haley lu richardson ♔ twenty-three ♔ she/her } well, well, well if it isn’t rowan foster running around peach hollow. legend has it, she comes from tangerine towers and has lived here her entire life. if you’re wondering what she’s been up to, i hear she’s a make up artist / freelance musician for a living. she has been known to be impulsive yet insightful. a word of advice to her, always look over your shoulder. you never know who is watching.

have a playlist and a pinterest board dedicated to her

rowan celeste foster was born may 27th, 1996. she’s the oldest of two, a baby sister coming to the scene in 1999.

she’d lead everyone other than her family and maybe one or two other people that she was away on a musician’s retreat, but really, was in inpatient treatment.

she’s currently working full time as a make up artist at pop of peach and performing when she can, but doesn’t really go outside of peach hollow

fun facts & personality

catch her driving her old ass ford focus blaring 00s alternative, mainly fuckin paramore bc she’s heart eyes for hayley williams

wanted connections if ya made it this far!!!!

bullies – people who fucked with her through school. it’s essential that they’re on bad terms currently, but perhaps an enemy turned friend or romantic could be fun??

group therapy pal – this would be super fun and might entail the person finding out about her secret…. msg me for deets

flirtationship – self explanatory, gender doesn’t matter she’s pan

any other ideas literally lmk!! thanks for reading ♥

#intro #repost!!!!

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