#maybe......i'll properly write it.......
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hi im rowan and im here to talk to u about
soft-hearted, concerned!simon with a size kink.
afab!reader, no prns, size kink, cunnilingus, fingering, possessive!simon for flavor <3 MDNI
on one hand, he's obsessed with the size difference. like OBSESSED. the second he set his eyes on u he was enamored. u were so sweet and seemed so, so fragile next to the battle hardened soldier. you had ur first date, ur second, third and so on.
all he could think about was spreading u open beneath him on his bed, his sheets soaked in your arousal, his pillow clenched in your firsts as you trembled underneath his touch.
he rubbed himself raw imagining pinning you down and squeezing is fat, heavy cock into the tiny, tight clutch of your pretty cunt. he nearly drooled all over himself when he was daydreaming about it in the middle of the day.
he always knew he had a bit of a thing for size differences between him and his partner but with you...it was out of control.
but on the other hand...he was so worried about hurting you. it would be such a big stretch to fit all of him — would you even be able to fit every inch? he doubted it. at least not without some tears and winces and that was not part of his fantasy.
if you were gonna cry it was going to be from how hard he made you cum. not bc his too big cock hurt you ):
so when he finally had you naked and at his mercy, he was at a crossroads; indulge his fantasy and fuck you open or let the overly concerned, protective side of himself win?
unfortunately for you, the concern won.
it took so long for him to finally give you his cock. for weeks he stuck to eating you out, fingering you, letting you give him handjobs — never blowing him!! u might choke ): poor thing.
he was working you open methodically as the days went by. stuffing you full of his tongue, one finger, two, and finally three. you'd tremble, gush, and cry as he made you cum over and over day after day to make you nice and malleable for when he finally would sink into you.
you were nearly in tears when you approached him one evening, dressed in one of his old army t-shirts that you had pulled out of the abyss of his closet.
you so sweetly requested that he finally fuck you, that you were tired of only getting his mouth and fingers. you wanted all of him.
simon got hard so fast he was worried about the blood rushing south too fast.
that was all he needed before you were trapped underneath his behemoth form. and before you knew it, you were creaming around his cock right at the base the second he sunk into you.
the obsession he had immediately grew into an addiction <3
#maybe......i'll properly write it.......#simon ghost riley#simon riley smut#simon ghost riley smut#ghost smut#cod smut#simon riley x reader#simon ghost riley x reader#ghost x reader#cod x reader
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You were sick. Your head was in a fog and your throat hurt something fierce. It was sweltering hot yet you shivered under the covers, hoping for the fever to pass soon. Your body, doing its best to get better, decided to empty the contents of your stomach over the side of the bed.
Beelzebub was the first to discover your condition. He came to wake you up in person when you hadn't shown up on time for breakfast. You were teetering like a newborn deer trying to clean up your mess. He was taken aback at the sight, at how clammy you were, and gently wiped the sweat from your face while checking how warm your forehead was. "You should lay down," he recommended, practically pushing you back into bed. You asked him to guide you to the bathroom instead.
He disappeared to fetch Lucifer. The eldest arrived immediately upon being informed of your condition. Your face muscles twitched as you tried to hold back a second round and apologized for the state you were in. Lucifer told you to stay quiet and just rest. "If you want to apologize, then get better soon."
"Don't tell anyone about this, ok?" you tried to ask. It came out as a garbled, barely perceptible whisper sending bolts of pain through your neck. You didn't want anyone to know how bad things really were.
"I do need to inform Diavolo, but rest assured I'll keep it brief." After ensuring you had water and would be fine alone for a few hours, Lucifer left early to inform RAD of your absence. He later texted you, "Don't hesitate to summon me if you need anything."
The house was quiet. It felt surreal to be the only one there. After some time had passed, you hobbled back to your bedroom and tried to sleep through the pain. Blissfully unaware of the chaos occurring elsewhere.
RAD is no small academy by any means, but rumors sure do spread fast. In first period, Beelzebub told Belphegor the sight he witnessed. They were overheard by Asmodeus, who lamented your absence to Solomon. Solomon asked Raphael to come with him to prepare some nutritious human food so you'd recover faster, and had to be forcibly stopped by Simeon. Luke found out by interrogating Solomon about why he was causing a scene in the kitchen.
Mephistopheles caught wind of the gossip and went directly to Diavolo for confirmation. Lucifer was none too happy at the situation, but the rumor mill was already spinning in full force. He did his best to uphold your image by telling anyone who broached the subject, "it's just the sniffles."
By lunchtime, Mammon was taking bets on how sick you were. "500 grimm says they're explodin' from both ends." "If that were the case, one of us would have stayed at the house with them," Satan rebutted, spying an easy win. "500 grimm says it's just coming out the bottom." They went back and forth, with others occasionally chipping in new symptoms such as hives or internal bleeding. Asmodeus, unable to listen any longer, left the cafeteria to post vague stories about his concern for you on social media.
Leviathan and Thirteen sent you get-well-soon text messages. One was full of worry and asked you to respond ASAP so they knew you weren't dying, as anxiety over your condition was causing them no end of fear. The other assured you to rest easy knowing that your candle was fine and you had plenty of time left before you kicked the bucket. It even recommended passing your bug onto someone else for fun.
You only saw the notifications in the evening, when a pounding headache woke you up and resounding footsteps in the hall signaled that people were home from school.
There was a knock at the door and Lucifer announced you had company. The crown prince and his butler imposed with a tray of fresh herbal tea. It would have smelled amazing if you possessed the ability to breathe through your nose. As the door shut behind them, you spotted at least ten figures out in the hallway.
Barbatos silently served you a hot cup, hopeful the rising stream would assist your sinuses. "Looks like you're recovering well!" Diavolo chimed. "That's great. I feared you were going to heave your guts out all day."
The frank sincerity caught you off guard and you choked on your tea. Barbatos was quick to grab the cup before it spilled.
"You knew?" you rasped. "Oh yes. Lucifer said it wasn't that bad, but tales of your illness have spread all over campus. We know human bodies aren't very strong."
You hunched down into the blankets to hide. The heat spreading across your face this time was not due to fever.
#MC “my reputation is in shambles”#this didn't go the way i wanted to write it but also - i'm sick!! so that's my excuse!!#maybe i'll rewrite it properly one day. this is based on a certain episode of a certain tv show.#obey me shall we date#obey me#obey me!#omswd#obey me scenarios#obey me swd#obey me x mc#obey me fanfic#obey me x reader#obey me fandom#obey me drabble#obey me fic#obey me mc
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you ever just have a lot, a LOT of feelings all at once about a character and not even remotely enough words or brainpower to FORM the words to describe everything you're feeling. so it feels like you may explode. yeah
#sorry i got really into my feelings about mark hoffman again#the very specific version of him in my brain that i really really wish i had the time and energy to properly share with you guys#saw#well until i muster the energy to explode all of my feelings out into a fic. if you want to TRY and understand#know that my three biggest hoffman fic insps right now are as follows#your best kept secret hoffman. a series of mistakes hoffman. and rushed like a dreadful wind hoffman.#there is a very clear throughline just know i am extremely emotionally compromised rn#thinking about theee fics vs the canon path hoffman spirals down#something something the absolute tragedy of watching a man's descent into madness#the transformation of a man into a monster#and what could have saved him from himself and kramer's corruption#sorry i'm rambling so much oh my god i was just having such a crying fit out of nowhere about this#do you think he could feel it happening. do you think he was aware he was losing his mind.#the script version of him fucks with me so bad. the crazed rankings and the longer hair and him not being well kept anymore#it's impossible to think he didn't know he was deteriorating#fuuuck okay i need to either chill or write a whole longfic rn#i project on that guy so much i truly don't know if i could properly write my vision of him#until i do something more substantial the full extent of my hoffman exists for me and my boyfriend only. they get me like no one else#well ginny and jenna also get me. please read best kept secret and a series of mistakes Oh My God#where am i going with this. i like tag rambling actually this is a nice way to do it without forcing EVERYONE to read my delirium#anyways if you've read all of this i think i love you? feel free to dm me about hoffman and my very specific headcanons and aus#maybe soon i'll try and start writing my fics about this tragic man#i could never say any of this on twitter btw they'd string me up for my opinions on him as a sad wet beast who could have been fixed#if only he hadn't been weaponized first#god i'm too tired to even be as embarrassed about this as i should be. thought i unlearned cringe already#but i've been spending way too much time on twitter and they HAAATE hoffman there#rip. i know it's not that serious but i'm sensitive rn and hate feeling lonely in my thoughts#ok bye for real otherwise i'll never shut up. i might tag ramble more often bc this was therapeutic in a way i needed badly#cat chat
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How Shang Qinghua Ends Up Conning a Sect
AU where everything happens as it does in canon right up until the Mobei-Jun mission.
Shang Qinghua's system warns him earlier than it does in canon to be prepared, and he connects the dots, at which point he freaks out because he does not want to become a canon fodder spy. So SQH starts to protest being assigned to the mission, doing his best to get out of going by grovelling before his shixiong. Unfortunately, the Peak Lord happens to be passing by as this is happening and expresses disapproval at SQH trying to shirk his duties, forcing him to go and also ending up in him being saddled with even more chores while he’s at it much to his fellow disciples’ smug pleasure.
Not that the smugness lasts for long since they all end up dead. SQH does what he does best and just plays dead instead of pledging allegiance and then runs away once MBJ passes out (no moshang in this AU rip). He makes his way to the Sect alone because he isn’t even sure if they’ll send someone for him and makes it there just as the search party is leaving, bursting into tears from exhaustion and relief and admitting that everyone else is dead because of a demon attack.
He’s mostly numb and in denial in the aftermath because what do you mean he’s just subverted his major death flag?? Does he just live normally now until Luo Binghe swings by to massacre them?
He’s debating this when SQQ swoops in suspiciously to question how Shang-shidi alone managed to survive and crawl his way back to the Sect, to which SQH freaks out and kind of implies (or outright states) that he can see the future. SQQ is immediately disbelieving and YQY intervenes because SQH looks close to having a stroke, and SQH figures that since he has already stuck his foot in his mouth, he may as well buckle down and run with his technically-not-a-lie. So, he tells them that he knows their whole lore, even name dropping Xuan Su, the Qiu mansion and Wu Yanzi because he's pretty much obligated to commit to the bit at this point.
YQY pales and SQQ immediately goes on the defensive, telling him to keep his mouth shut, to which SQH protests because he’s known this whole time and hasn’t said a word. He really just wants to lay low and mind his business, guys, he swears. This is YOUR toxic doomed yaoi, not OUR toxic doomed yaoi.
YQY tells him that SQH clearly has a gift and they should inform the Peak Lords. SQH protests because obviously there’s no gift to speak of, and his ass does not need to risk being exposed like this. SQQ— still clearly on the fence about the whole seeing the future thing— agrees and practically drags SQH to face judgement for his crime of bullshitting.
Surprisingly, the An Ding Peak Lord actually appears to consider this farce because he remembers how badly SQH didn’t want to go on this mission. Appearing horrified, he asks, “Is this why you didn’t want to go? Because you knew what awaited you?” SQH just goes with it, nodding along and looking extra pathetic. “Well, why didn’t you tell me?”
Because he’d look like a crazy person??? “This disciple is aware that his…foresight is hard to believe in.” Great, now his Shizun thinks he has a tragic backstory like Cassandra or something. Good. Feel bad. You sent SQH into the jaws of death after all. Some guilt is exactly what you should be feeling.
The Sect Leader who is also present is less quick to trust in SQH’s claims since he isn’t angsting over the death of a bunch of disciples, and he proposes that they test SQH’s abilities somehow. Shit, SQH should have written this guy to be stupider; now he’s about to be executed or something for lying. He wracks his brains desperately for the plot he only really half-recalls, and manages to give out the location of some super mystical artefact to convince them. Just to be safe, he also says he knows the courtesy names of the entire Qing generation to come, though he refrains from telling them exactly which pupil will inherit the names. It takes a few days to confirm both his ‘predictions’ but soon enough SQH has been dubbed a certified Seer.
He ends up having to spend some time with Qian Cao and the divination/feng shui Peak Lords so they can make sure he’s physically and spiritually alright while they try to work out the extent of his powers so he isn’t hurting himself somehow. Since there are no powers to speak of, SQH knows it’s all useless but just lets them do whatever. The divination/feng shui Peak Lord is a little puzzled because usually divination involves seeking visions out through ritual, sacrifice or calculation. Seemingly random visions that are involuntary and inherent are exceedingly rare. They can’t sense anything inhuman or demonic off him either so it’s 100% all him, which is a trait of an extremely rare form of shamanism. SQH is mildly hysterical listening to them puzzle over his bullshit but needs must.
”Shang-shizi must have encountered some powerful god or spirit as a baby or in a past life.”
Sure, yeah, let's go with that. Why ever the fuck not.
They inform him that evil spirits and demons are often attracted to people like him for their qi, so he needs to learn how to defend himself. Caught in a lie of his own making, SQH can only curse in his heart and agree.
The An Ding Peak Lord offers to let him transfer to the feng shui peak (still wanting to compensate SQH somehow) but System immediately starts threatening SQH who bursts into tears from how stressful this ordeal has been and begs on his knees to be allowed to stay on An Ding. His Shizun is deeply touched, mistaking his desperation as love for this peak, and of course allows him to stay, remarking over how he had no idea “Hua-er was such a good, filial child” and that “this master is so lucky to have such a devoted disciple.” The misunderstandings between them continue to grow.
Since he’s stuck spending inordinate amounts of time learning various chants, prayers and rituals to protect himself, he has to do some serious bootlicking if he ever wants to be promoted to Inner Disciple. Thus, SQH doubles down on sabotaging his seniors and currying favour with Shizun in every spare moment he has. At least the others are discouraged from giving him too many chores because of his tighter schedule and Shizun's guilt. Shamelessly, SQH employs some of the tricks he’s learning (like talisman-making and minor spells) to his advantage so that he’s positively hovering around his Shizun like a very dedicated housefly over an attractive pile of garbage.
His shizun is none the wiser and is convinced his little disciple is a dutiful angel. Soon enough, SQH bags his promotion and subverts System-given punishment.
Rumours about his “power” spread, and people want to prod and see for themselves if it’s legit. Most of the time, he has to turn them away because fuck you he’s not a fortune cookie and he has no powers to speak of anyways, but sometimes someone will ask him something that he actually does know. For example, A Qian Cao disciple needs to know where to find this super niche herb, or SQH knows how to cure this obscure predicament, or Qing Jing needs to know about some culture or beast, or Wan Jian wants to find a super rare ore. Shizun is struggling with a contract, but SQH recognises that name as wife #465’s backstory and spills the tea, allowing them to be “talked into” better terms. Sometimes, he just makes educated guesses about the economic scene based on modern trends and statistics, and people hail him as a prophet. As a gift, his Shizun gives him a journal they recovered from a former shaman. SQH is horrified by the fact that he now essentially possesses a grimoire.
Then one day, he receives a request from his juniors to investigate a shed they swear is haunted. It is haunted, but SQH manages to banish the ghost and it’s fine. No biggie. Why are they looking at him with stars in their eyes? He also realises atp that the more he learns to use the spiritual arts, the more he’s able to interact with spirits (very double-edged sword) and great now that’s one more dumb fucking way he could die. He decides to say fuck it to xianxia social norms and tattoos himself with protective seals because hell nah. There may or may not be a small fan club growing in the background but that's not important (it is to me I want him to be appreciated).
Inevitably, he’s assigned to a mission. Unfortunately, he’s stuck with SQQ, who specifically requested to work with him much to Shizun’s delight (his Hua-er is making connections!) and SQH’s dismay. They’re supposed to appraise some rare book or whatever and negotiate a trade because Qing Jing’s Peak Lord really wants this one fucking book. SQH spends the entire trip to the collector’s home sweating while SQQ glares at him. It just gets worse because once they get there, the place is closed which pisses SQQ off even more who acts like it’s SQH’s fault.
Before SQH can apologise for daring to exist, a woman peeks out at them from inside the shop and appears to be greatly relieved to see a pair of cultivators. She tells them her husband has been acting super fucking weird but the doctors’ haven’t been able to help, claiming that he’s just gone insane, but maybe the cultivators can take a look and make sure it’s not some demon. SQH wants to protest because this is so far above his pay grade but SQQ silences him with one look and asks to be taken to the husband since “My shidi here is particularly gifted with the spirit arts.” Shen-shixiong, please this one is sorry, have mercy!
Anyways, SQH takes one look at the guy and is like “No yeah he’s definitely possessed lol.” He has to perform some ritual to determine just what is possessing the husband though and learns that it’s a ghost that will have to be forcibly ejected out of the dude’s body. SQQ is dubious about his skills but goes along with it begrudgingly, helping SQH gather supplies for the exorcism since they’re stuck seeing this through now because of him. He’s being prissy, and Qinghua is already nervous about an impromptu exorcism when he’s never done one by himself so he ends up snapping at him about “I’m not out to get you! I didn’t mean to learn your tragic backstory, but I’ve known all along and could literally not give less of a fuck, so can you stop being even more of an asshole than usual and just find me some fucking flowers so we can be done with this and go home!” And SQQ is so startled by the uncharacteristic outburst that he goes along with it.
The exorcism is…fine. The ritual is ok, but SQH wasn’t expecting quite that much resistance, so he has to have SQQ distract the ghost while he works on banishing it back to whatever hole it crawled out of. It’s tiring work, especially for his first solo exorcism, and he pretty much passes out as soon as it’s over. He wakes up in one of the collector’s guest bedrooms and awkwardly apologises for fainting and also for screaming at SQQ earlier. SQQ looks at him and sniffs, graciously forgiving him. SQH earnestly reiterates that he’ll keep his mouth shut about the stuff he knows. SQQ doesn’t respond to that but tells him that the collector is giving them the book for free as thanks so they can fuck off as soon as SQH is well enough.
They give the book to QJ Peak Lord but before SQH can fuck off, SQQ corners him again. “Earlier, you mentioned something about Xuan Su that Yue-shixiong clearly wanted to keep secret. What is it?” SQH tries to dither “ah, it’s really not my place…” Then he sees the look on SQQ’s face, remembers that he actually values his life and promptly rats YQY out before scurrying off to safety while SQQ immediately flies over to Qiong Ding to rip YQY a new one for keeping such a huge secret from him.
SQH is tasked to tidy Shizun’s office before some guests arrive and ends up rearranging the furniture because the feng shui in there sucked ass tbh and his Shizun is so pleased by the gesture that he decides to start grooming him for head disciple duties. Not that SQH really realises what’s happening. He just knows he suddenly has even more grunt work to do and is silently cursing his Shizun out over it.
He’s on Qiong Ding for inventory when YQY corners him much to his horror because YQY is wearing his super creepy empty smile as he brings up how SQH snitched on him. SQH is already halfway through apologising for breathing when YQY cuts him off to thank him for the intervention, assuring him that if SQH needs help or a favour, YQY will have his back. Great. Thanks I guess???
Anyways so thanks to his connections, his Shizun is even more impressed and officially makes him Head Disciple. First order of business is actually a mission with Liu Qingge since SQQ is going with YQY. Their mission is to investigate a haunted mirror that causes hallucinations and basically tricks its victims into violent self-destruction. Before they can even enter, SQH is making LQG promise that he won’t try to attack or provoke the mirror because if LQG goes crazy and tries to kill SQH, he might actually die. LQG scoffs, mutters something about weak cultivation, begrudgingly promises, and then promptly gets impatient halfway through SQH extensive diagnosis and packaging process and tries to stab the mirror because it reeks of evil and should clearly be destroyed.
Luckily, SQH’s idiot system actually has its uses and it doesn’t allow any other sentient being to influence him meaning he’s pretty possession proof. Unluckily, LQG does not have this built in immunity and starts trying to kill SQH who is suddenly stuck fighting for his life against the soon-to-be War God of Bai Zhan. He runs and screams the whole time and kind of blacks out in his blind panic, but next thing he knows, he’s slapped LQG with a temporary qi disrupting talisman and locked him in a room. It won’t hold him for long, but at least he’s bought himself some time with this. SQH then has to go about exorcising the fucking mirror. Halfway through his chanting, LQG escapes his enclosure and bursts in, so now SQH is hysterically fighting him off while simultaneously finishing his chant because if he stops, he’ll have to start over and it might legitimately kill him. He manages and then chucks some stray debris to shatter it for good measure just as LQG tackles him. The spell breaks and LQG just kind of freezes, supremely disoriented and trying to figure out what is happening when SQH just fucking decks him, punting him through the already damaged wall and yelling, “I asked you not to do one thing, and what do you do?! You do the thing! The thing I specifically asked you not to do!! You fucking clown, Liu-shidi! You’re lucky you’re so pretty because, right now, it’s the only thing keeping me from ripping your face off and beating you to death with it” before promptly bursting into tears.
It’s a really awkward flight back home because SQH is straight up refusing to even acknowledge LQG’s existence (partly out of anger because what an idiot and partly because he just threatened someone who could definitely eviscerate him???), and LQG is unusually contrite in the wake of the mission that he almost botched and his usually timid shixiong’s fury. When they make it back to the sect, he goes to apologise (because SQH is a really fast flier and LQG could barely catch up to him the whole trip, let alone speak), but SQH cuts him off and orders him to go to Qian Cao and have them do a post-possession check up while he goes to give his Shizun a report on why they destroyed the mirror they were actually supposed to bring back for storage. LQG sulks harder but actually does as asked because SQH still looks to be in no mood for arguments.
Once things have calmed, SQH is mortified and determined to just avoid LQG because it’s super likely the guy will just forget about his existence so long as he stays out of sight. LQG does not forget. LQG keeps trying to seek him out and leaving monster carcasses for him to find, which SQH assumes with horror is meant to be a threat to his life and just avoids his shidi even harder. He’s not above fainting to get out of confrontations too! LQG has no idea what he’s dealing with.
A very frustrated and determined LQG finally manages to corner SQH after a Peak Lord meeting that the Head Disciples got to sit in on to learn since their shizuns are going to ascend soon. SQH decides that SQQ is actually the lesser of two evils and shamelessly dives behind him for cover which instantly pisses LQG off because “You’re willing to use him to avoid me?”
SQQ: Ex-cuse me? What is that supposed to mean?
SQH: Yeah! I love hanging out with Shen-shixong!
[collective disbelief]
YQY: (fake smiling and subtly hiding SQH behind him) Did you need something from Shang-shidi, Liu-shidi?
LQG: …wanted to thank him. and apologise.
SQH: Wait why????
LQG: for the mission. I screwed up and you had to complete the mission on your own when it was my job to protect you and provide backup. You could have left me since I was a hinderance to our objective and went against your orders but you didn’t. Thank you.
SQH: Well, it’s fine now, isn’t it?
LQG: (insistent) You saved my life
SQH: We’re martial siblings, haha, no biggie
SQQ: (immediately catching on and suddenly very smug) So you owe Shang-shidi a debt
SQH: He does????
LQG: I do
SQH: You do????
LQG wants to know how to repay the debt but SQH just waves him off, saying he’ll let him know if he thinks of something, mostly just to be rid of him because he’s really intense and it’s not good for SQH’s heart. LQG just thinks that SQH is dismissing him because he probably thinks LQG is unreliable after the disaster mission. Well, LQG will just have to prove him otherwise. And so begin the misunderstandings between these two as well.
Meanwhile, SQH’s Shizun watching with fond eyes: Ah, my Hua-er is making so many friends. He’s so popular. I’m so proud.
Qian Cao’s peak lord: Actually, I think he’s having a heart attack right now. Someone should probably get him.
The battle against TLJ takes place and most of the martial siblings have to go help the effort, though SQH is not one of them because the sect does have to keep running while everyone's gone. He’s helping SQQ double check that the Qing Jing supplies are up to par and he can tell SQQ is nervous because he's even more snappy and irritable than usual. Finally, SQH turns to him and says with certainty, “It will be fine, shixiong. You will be fine, Yue-shixiong will be fine, Liu-shidi will downright thrive.”
SQQ: Who’s worried about that meathead?
SQH: I’m just saying.
SQQ: …You’ve had a vision
SQH: Sure
SQQ asks for details and SQH admits YQY will have to unsheathe his blade but he will survive and his newly earned renown will really boost the sect’s own reputation once he becomes Sect Leader. Suspicious about the way SQH says that, SQQ prods about casualties. SQH admits that they will be ascending as Peak Lords very soon though he doesn’t elaborate on who it is specifically because “Knowledge of the future is a heavy weight to bear, shixiong.”
SQQ: What, you think I’m too weak to know?
SQH: I didn’t say that. I know exactly how strong you are and I admire you, but…I wouldn’t wish this burden upon anyone else, shixiong. Not truly. It’s dangerous and disheartening. People shouldn’t be privy to their fate. It’s unnatural.
SQQ lets it go because SQH looks abnormally intense as he talks about how he views his gift, but it does leave him thoughtful about just what kind of futures SQH foresees.
Anyways, the Sect Leader gets fatally injured in the battle, and the Peak Lords ascend hastily before he can actually die so that they can all pass on together. SQH finally succeeds in his longstanding mission, but he can’t say he’s thrilled about the promotion considering he has to really hit the ground running. An Ding can’t afford transition phases as things stand. So, he spends a month categorising which systems to keep, which to overhaul and how he’d overhaul them. All the staff is ruthlessly vetted, and he’s basically functioning as a one-man army just trying to keep on top of all the requests being sent his way too.
Needless to say, when he stumbles into the first official mandatory Peak Lords meeting, he looks like death itself. He’s straight up dissociating through most of it, only listening with half an ear when he’s directly addressed. He doesn’t even remember what he said when it was his turn to speak because he’s so out of it. At some point, he lifts his tea, misses his mouth and just pours it in his lap without blinking. SQQ watches him with equal parts clinical curiosity and disgust. The agenda is finished and it’s open floor for anyone who has anything extra to mention. Someone requests something from him and he nods along without really hearing it because if it’s not on paper, it’s not important right now.
Someone starts an argument and Qi Qingqi is being extra loud to be heard; they still haven’t been dismissed even though all of this is unnecessary and SQH has a killer migraine. He turns to god and prays for patience. SQQ, sitting next to him and listening, corrects him because he’s using the wrong phrase. “You mean strength,” he says.
SQH snorts and mutters under his breath, “If the gods gave me strength, Qi-shimei would be dead.”
In a room of Peak Lords, whispering is pointless. There is silence as everyone stares at an unusually vindictive SQH. QQQ looks baffled, affronted, and impressed simultaneously.
Then, LQG mutters, “I thought I was the only one he threatened like that.” He manages to sound both relieved and put out.
SQQ, like a shark smelling blood, turns to stare at him judgmentally and, in a condescendingly sweet manner, asks, “Is shidi upset about not getting special treatment anymore?” The provocation works, of course, and a new argument errupts.
SQH watches blankly, hands twitching to his sleeves where he keeps talismans, tired and unhinged enough to actually contemplate literally cursing his martial siblings when a pointed “Shang-shidi” draws his attention to YQY who smiles emptily and says, “No.”
”But, shixiong—”
”No.”
Then, one day, YQY, SQQ, SQH, QQQ and LQG are on their way back from some formal sect event or the other when they come across a growing mass of supernatural resentment flying right towards them. Naturally, as the ‘psychic’ SQH is looked upon to figure out what is going on. He’s reluctant to really get close and is kind of mumbling while he places diagnostic arrays, “Man it’d be convenient if you could just straight up tell me so we’d all save time.” The mass kind of pauses for a moment and then clears just enough for SQH’s more supernaturally attuned eyes to see.
”Su Xiyan?!!”
Su Xiyan the Bog Monster is clearly trying to tell him something but he’s not psychic enough for actual ghostly communication so it takes him a second to make out through the garbled moaning and pained shrieking that she says baby at some point. “Oh, Luo Binghe?” he says, happy just to have caught something. The Bog Monster projects surprise. The Peak Lords watch with dispassionate confusion.
“Yeah I know the whole story. Sorry about what happened to you by the way. I couldn’t really do anything to stop it unfortunately. Something about fixed points in fate that can’t be changed? Not that that’s like fair. To you, I mean.” Great now he feels guilty and SQQ has the creepy contemplative look in his eyes again. “So, how can I help you?”
More convoluted bog monster charades ensues. Finally, he guesses she wants him to go find LBH and take care of him because he’s just been orphaned. Again.
So, SQH turns to his fellow Peak Lords, shrugs at them, offers no other explanation and accepts that he’s about to change the fate of the world as he knew it. In the end, it’s maddeningly simple really. LBH is a tiny thing, all of seven years old, big eyes in a precious face framed by adorable curly hair. SQH tells him he’s an immortal master who knew his birth mother and LBH, after some explaining that his mom actually loved him and was forced to abandon him because she was dying, agrees to go with him. So, SQH is officially a dad now. Su Xiyan, satisfied that her baby is ok for good, lets go of her resentments and moves on to the afterlife.
SQH has the dubious honour of explaining to his martial siblings that he has adopted a half-demon child because his ghost mom asked him to, admitting to the full story of what actually happened between Su Xiyan and TLJ. Understandably, they’re shocked. There’s initially some questions about why SQH didn’t say anything sooner when an innocent Su Xiyan was imprisoned. SQH says that he couldn’t. SQQ deduces that his gift of foresight actually comes at a cost.
There’s no gift so there’s no real cost, but SQH isn’t above lying. He just openly says that if he tries to change certain things he knows of, it would cost him his life. He didn’t even want to come to Cang Qiong initially, but every time he even thought of changing his fate, he knew he’d die. He knew about YQY’s qi deviation before YQY had even become an inner disciple but again he couldn’t stop it. He hadn’t even thought of intervening in LBH’s fate because he’d assumed he couldn’t. He doesn’t know why he’s being allowed now.
SQQ catches onto the implication that LBH is important to fate somehow then, and SQH haltingly admits that, as far as he knew, LBH would have the power to end the world if he so wanted. If Cang Qiong looks after him and supports him though, they’d have all that power devoted to them. In the end it doesn’t take much convincing to be honest. LBH does have that white sheep protagonist halo thing going for him after all.
SQH ends up freeing TLJ, claiming that he’s just diverting the potential end of the world. TLJ is revived and told the full truth of what happened. He meets LBH who is very confused and very shy, but not averse. At least until he realises he might have to go away with TLJ at which he point he bursts into tears because he doesn’t want to leave SQH. Since TLJ is now stuck co-parenting, he agrees to a secret alliance with Cang Qiong and goes to make sure the demon realm hasn’t forgotten who’s boss.
LBH grows up in both realms, learning under LQG and his dad and fully coming into his own as a supremely powerful cultivator and heir to the demon throne. SQQ asks if SQH ever foresaw his own death and SQH admits that he did. He saw all of their deaths. SQQ asks if fate really can be changed to which SQH is happy to report that yeah, not everything is set in stone.
”And what do you see now?”
”Nothing actually. I haven’t had a vision in years.” Or ever.
”Doesn’t that make you nervous?”
”Everything makes me nervous, shixiong.” Pause. “But, this once, it’s not too bad. Not knowing what the future holds means that anything is possible.”
Fate will be what they make of it now, and this is just the beginning.
#svsss#the scum villain's self saving system#ships are open to interpretation in this one#shang qinghua#cang qiong mountain sect#fic idea#maybe one day I'll write this out properly but this is my offering for now#i hope you see my vision#(get it? vision. like the ones SQH isn't having)#shen qingqiu#liu qingge#svsss au
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Just sitting here thinking about Darlin' and Sam spending Christmas together super early in the morning before the sun About Lovely and Vincent joining them because they're no longer apart of the Solaire House and don't want to spend it alone
About Darlin' trying (and failing) to sneak around Sam's house to cover the windows with blackout curtains that David got them so they can spend the whole day with them About the pack and their mates coming over halfway through the day and finding the vamps sitting and talking around a half dead fire place while Darlin' is asleep in Sam's lap and he's running his hand through their hair About Darlin' waking up to Asher and Milo and Vincent and Angel yelling at each other while they play Smash or Mario Kart or whatever and David and Babe and Sam are in the kitchen making dinner, because they'd been asleep all day About Sweetheart and Lovely dragging Darlin' into Sam's study with them to help them get gifts wrapped and let them wake up without decking Asher in their half asleep stupor About everyone crowding in Sam's living room, at some point a tree being put up and hastily decorated and Angel turning off ALL the lights so that the only light in the room is Christmas lights About Darlin' sitting against Sam's side and watching everyone open gifts and laugh and drink boozy eggnog that Sweetheart made at some point and finding themself smile when they finally realize that they've found a family to spend holidays with and being able to be dumb and not have to be on the offensive About everyone stumbling out the door late that night, leaving Darlin' sitting in the living and Sam tidying up dishes and left over pieces of wrapping paper About Darlin' moving to lay their head under the tree that's still set up, staring up at the lights, and Sam joining them soon after About Darlin' worming their way into his side before mumbling a 'thank you' that never gets explained, and Sam just humming and holding them close before slipping a necklace on them with a black ring with his and their initials on it, and Darlin' feels a tear fall as they hold each other tighter, the Christmas lights reflecting off the ring and keeping them company as they fall asleep against each other
#redacted audio#redacted asmr#in case you can't tell#i have many thoughts about them#and them on christmas#maybe i'll write this properly#redacted sam#redacted darlin#redacted david#redacted angel#redacted asher#redacted babe#redacted milo#redacted sweetheart#redacted vincent#redacted lovely
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#alanwakeedit#alan wake#alan wake 2#ilkka villi#scratch#mk.op#mk.edit#mk.gifs#on my vacation i jotted down some ideas for gifsets#but i got home and just like. have no willpower to do anything other than wallow#but i just. i felt like i had to make SOMETHING so#and i am quite obsessed with ilkka rubbing his bloody hands over his face and wish we got the unedited footage of it#maybe i'll feel better enough in a few days to properly create#i know it's a dangerous path to tie my self worth to creating but here i am doing it again. ugh.#i'm incapable of taking a proper break from it#(except writing apparently)#((and i know it's probably just. grief.))
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good morning i am once again thinking of hades au ren and the desire to ask all my mutuals what god / type of demigod they would be in an au like that is strong
#ooc.#remember when i didn't shut the fuck up about this#i'll think harder about this today and maybe finally properly write smth for it.#i want to write but my brain is tired and netflix is looking at me with its big blue eyes.#but headcanons? i've been feeling are easier to write so.#i even have a whole pin board for hades au ren i just never did anything with him.#chews on all your cables.#i see you i perceive you.
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I am making the Neuvillette egg story and my brain exploded trying to figure out how I wanted the sea monster to look...please wish my brain a speedy recovery so I may work on this dang thing 😔
#like do I make this dang thing like a squid or some shit or do I make it completely outta water able to do whatever the hell it wants#do I make it a heckin noodle looking thing? a heckin blob???? i dunno I am stuck#neuvillette is literally meeting them right now but how describe creature ;v;#maybe I'll make them a water dragon out of...water????? i have no idea what is going to fuck this dragon man? aaaaAAAAAAAAA 😭#I wanna skip it and just continue writing but like if I dont know appearance how am I supposed to describe what theyre doing properly????#I am in another hell of my own making once again as I procrastinate the A/B/O guide 🙃#FicMode Ideas
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If you're a dungeon meshi fic writer: here's a resource on how to bleed animals for consumption (IMAGES ARE SILHOUETTED AND NOT GOREY). just wanted to share, cause I found it cool.
https://www.hsa.org.uk/bleeding-and-pithing/bleeding
#dunmeshi#not a rb#art ref#dungeon meshi#delicious in dungeon#Maybe someday I'll make a foraging masterlist for fic writing#like how to leech tannins out of acorns or properly preserve jams
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Caleb Xia, his gravity manipulation Evol, and his innate, almost primal need to push you against the wall, pull you closer to his body, negate any space between your bodies, thrusts his hips harder into your core, weighs you down with his body and added gravity as you both come apart and sink deeper into your rekindled affection...
#2am honry thoughts#needed to get this out sorry#i'll write this out properly later#maybe#one day#love and deepspace#lads caleb#love and deepspace caleb
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“You don’t have to come with me, you know,” Utena said again.
And again, Anthy just smiled beatifically back at her and followed Utena down the now dark paths, back to their dorm.
“I hoped you would win,” Anthy said.
Utena stopped and turned to face Anthy in the orange glow of a streetlight. “How do I know you’re not just saying that because it’s what you think I want to hear?”
“You don’t.” Anthy lowered her gaze so the light was no longer reflected off her glasses. “But there’s no one else I would rather have as my champion.”
#v writes#Revolutionary Girl Utena#Utena Tenjou#Anthy Himemiya#Utena x Anthy#drabble of the day#inspired by Datte Atashi no Hero by LiSA (the second ending for My Hero Academia season 2 which I watched a while back)#this may be my first time writing them?#the end of the show is so much but I that first arc is fascinating with so many mysteries that are never quite answered#maybe one day I'll explore some of it properly (but for now at least here's some of Anthy being weirdly ominous <3)
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I blame @kirkaut post and @eliotwaughdeservesbetter post and most importantly @cjlouwho who have been bombarding me with their whump posts past few days 😭😭😭😭
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Angst AU where Buck found out no one from 118 reached Tommy for his side of the story after the breakup and realized he doesn't have to listen to their stupid, stupid advices to move on.
He called Tommy but left voicemails instead, telling him what he wanted to say and told him to call back before 118 received a call for a level 4 fire where a collapse trapped Buck with a child he shielded from the debris.
Tommy, who was air support, helped everyone look for Buck and the kid, found them just in time for Buck to pass away in his arms, telling him that he was his first and last after all.
After the funeral, Tommy finally heard the voicemails.
---------------
You have three voicemails.
Tiredly Tommy clicked play, thinking it was his captain or someone from 217 trying to reach him.
He froze the moment Evan’s voice filled the empty room.
—--
H-Hey. It’s me, Evan. Sorry. It must be weird. Hearing my voice like this. I, uh, saw Miriam earlier today and she told me you weren’t doing well. At first, I’m a bit mad, cos, what right for you to be suffering when you’re the one who broke my heart? But then she said she never saw you like this and she really thought that this time was serious between the two of us. Which I thought the same too. So I called Lucy to check up on you and I found out she’s in Vancouver now and how no one from 118 have been talking since our breakup.
So I asked them and they said some bullshit about I’m their friend and you’re my ex so they’re on my side and you’re dead to them?
I may have yelled at them? C-Cos it’s not fair. You were their friend first too and I’m the ex in this situation so they shouldn’t be talking to me too. I can’t believe no one talked to you? Asking your side of the story? Kept telling me to not call you and move on?! Where was that advice when Chim chased my sister to Boston when she ran? *snort* anyways what I want to say is -
—-----
Hey, it’s me again. Stupid voicemail limit. What I want to say is for the past two months, I can’t stop thinking about you. And everytime I was tempted to call you, I turned to baking and let me tell you, I baked enough to feed the entire West Hollywood for a week.
You said you were my first and cannot be my last but I think you’re wrong. I’ve been in so many relationships and know what it's like to be in love and having a heartbreak. And you, you get to walk away and break my heart just because you’re afraid to take chances. Because I do, I want to take a chance with you, and see where this goes.
So yea, I’m sorry I moved too fast and caused you to panic when I asked you to move in with me when you have your own house to live in. Call me when you get this and let’s talk because I'm ready to listen and to fight for both of us.
—---
Shit, I forgot to say something. I Love you Tommy. Be safe, yea?
—--
Tommy collapsed to the floor, crying loudly, gasping for air but it was like he was breathing in smoke, grief killing him slowly.
He was too late.
And now Evan is dead.
#bucktommy#evan buckley#tommy kinard#angst#sad ending#they didn't get their second chance#I'm sorry for this#Maybe I'll write it properly
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Do you ever think about how in the beginning it was Maglor who followed Feanor blindly in burning the ships and Maedhros who refused and in the end it was Maglor who wanted to break the oath while Maedhros was determined to keep it?
#does it make you feel insane?#because it does for me#there are multiple instances of them being opposites and mirrors of each other#and maybe one day I'll write it down properly#maedhros#maglor#maemags#feanorians#silm
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once again thinking about how one of the biggest reasons it feels to me that buddie could go canon is that no one makes jokes about them being together
#something something they dont make jokes about it cuz its not a joke#this makes sense in my head but idk how to explain it properly#was gonna write my thought process in the tags but I'm struggling to even do that so maybe I'll come back to it#rambling about 911#911#buddie
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Do you conlang? I was wondering if you had naming languages (or possibly even more developed ones) for pulling the words you use. I tried to search your blog but didn't find anything, wouldn't be surprised if the feature is just busted tho. Your worldbuilding is wonderful and I particularly enjoy the anthropological and linguistic elements.
Ok the thing is I had kind of decided I was not going to do any conlanging because I don't feel like I'm equipped to do a good job of it, like was fully like "I'm just going to do JUST enough that it doesn't fail an immediate sniff test and is more thoughtful than just keysmashing and putting in vowels". And then have kinda been conlanging anyway (though not to a very deep and serious extent. I maybe have like....an above average comprehension of how language construction works via willingness to research, but that's not saying much, also I can never remember the meanings of most linguistic terms like 'frictives' or etc off the top of my head. I'm just kinda raw dogging it with a vague conceptualization of what these things mean)
I do at least have a naming language for Wardi (and more basic rules for other established languages) but the rudimentary forms of it were devised with methods much shakier and less linguistically viable than even the most basic naming language schemes, and I only went back over it LONG after I had already made a bunch of words so there's some inconsistencies with consonant presence and usage. (This can at least be justified because it IS a language that would have a lot of loanwords and would be heavily influenced by other language groups- Burri being by far the most significant, Highland-Finnic and Yuroma-Lowlands also being large contributors)
The 'method' I used was:
-Skip basic construction elements and fully move into devising necessary name words, with at least a Vibe of what consonants are going to be common and how pronunciation works -Identify some roots out of the established words and their meanings. Establish an ongoing glossary of known roots/words. -Construct new words based in root words, or as obvious extensions/variants of established words. -Get really involved in how the literal meanings of some words might not translate properly to english, mostly use this to produce a glossary of in-universe slang. -Realize that I probably should have at least some very basic internal consistency at this point. -Google search tutorials on writing a naming language. -Reverse engineer a naming language out of established words, and ascribe all remaining inconsistencies to being loanwords or just the mysteries of life or whatever.
I do at least have some strongly established pronunciation rules and a sense of broad regional dialect/accents.
-'ai' words are almost always pronounced with a long 'aye' sound.
-There is no 'Z' or 'X' sound, a Wardi speaker pronouncing 'zebra' would go for 'tsee-brah', and would attempt 'xylophone' as 'ssye-lohp-hon'
-'V' sounds are nearly absent and occur only in loanwords, and tend to be pronounced with a 'W' sound. 'Virsum' is a Highland word (pronounced 'veer-soom') denoting ancestry, a Wardi speaker would go 'weer-sum'.
-'Ch' spellings almost always imply a soft 'chuh' sound when appearing after an E, I, or O (pelatoche= pel-ah-toh-chey), but a hard 'kh' sound after an A or U (odomache= oh-doh-mah-khe). When at the start of a word, it's usually a soft 'ch' unless followed by an 'i' sound (chin (dog) is pronounced with a hard K 'khiin', cholem (salt) is pronounced with a soft Ch 'cho-lehm')
-Western Wardin has strong Burri cultural and linguistic influence, and a distinct accent- one of the most pronounced differences is use of the ñ sound in 'nn' words. The western city of Ephennos is pronounced 'ey-fey-nyos' by most residents, the southeastern city of Erubinnos is pronounced 'eh-roo-been-nos' by most residents. Palo's surname 'Apolynnon' is pronounced 'A-puh-lee-nyon' in the Burri and western Wardi dialects (which is the 'proper' pronunciation, given that it's a Kos name), but will generally be spoken as 'Ah-poh-leen-non' in the south and east.
-R's are rolled in Highland-Finnic words. Rolling R's is common in far northern rural Wardi dialects but no others. Most urban Wardi speakers consider rolling R's sort of a hick thing, and often think it sounds stupid or at least uneducated. (Brakul's name should be pronounced with a brief rolled 'r', short 'ah' and long 'uul', but is generally being pronounced by his south-southeastern compatriots with a long unrolled 'Brah' sound).
Anyway not really a sturdy construction that will hold up to the scrutiny of someone well equipped for linguistics but not pure bullshit either.
#I actually did just make a post about this on my sideblog LOL I think in spite of my deciding not to conlang this is going to go full#full conlanging at some point#The main issue is that the narrative/dialogue is being written as an english 'translation' (IE the characters are speaking in their actual#tongues and it's being translated to english with accurate meaning but non-literal treatment)#Which you might say like 'Uh Yeah No Shit' but I think approaching it with that mindset at the forefront does have a different effect than#just fully writing in english. Like there's some mindfulness to what they actually might be saying and what literal meanings should be#retained to form a better understanding of the culture and what should be 'translated' non-literally but with accurate meaning#(And what should be not translated at all)#But yeah there's very little motivation for conlanging besides Pure Fun because VERY few Wardi words beyond animal/people/place names#will make it into the actual text. Like the only things I leave 'untranslated' are very key or untranslatable concepts that will be#better understood through implication than attempts to convey the meaning in english#Like the epithet 'ganmachen' is used to compliment positive traits associated with the ox zodiac sign or affectionately tease#negative ones. This idea can be established pretty naturally without exposition dumps because the zodiac signs are of cultural#importance and will come up frequently. The meaning can get across to the reader pretty well if properly set up.#So like leaving it as 'ganmachen' you can get 'oh this is an affectionate reference to an auspicious zodiac sign' but translating#it as the actual meaning of 'ox-faced' is inevitably going to come across as 'you look like a cow' regardless of any zodiac angle#^(pretty much retyped tags from other post)#Another aspect is there's a few characters that have Wardi as a second language and some of whom don't have a solid grasp on it#And I want to convey this in dialogue (which is being written in english) but I don't want it to just be like. Random '''broken''' english#like I want there to be an internal consistency to what parts of the language they have difficulties with (which then has implications for#how each language's grammar/conjugation/etc works). Like Brakul is fairly fluent in Wardi at the time of the story but still struggles#with some of the conjugation (which is inflectional in Wardi) especially future/preterite tense. So he'll sometimes just use the#verb unconjugated or inappropriately in present tense. Though this doesn't come across as starkly in text because it's#written in english. Like his future tense Wardi is depicted as like 'I am to talk with him later' instead of 'I'll talk with him later'#Which sounds unnatural but not like fully incorrect#But it would sound much more Off in Wardi. Spanish might be a better example like it would be like him approaching it with#'Voy a hablar con él más tarde' or maybe 'Hablo con él más tarde' instead of 'Hablaré con él más tarde'#(I THINK. I'm not a fluent spanish speaker sorry if the latter has anything wrong with it too)
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"So you won't brush your hair, but you'll brush mine?"
"Combing my hair is an unnecessary use of time. This, on the other hand, is not."
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Hehehehe Wis and Qi brainrot is the only thing getting me through finals :> My tumblr/fics have been pretty dead for a good part of this semester, but rest assured, I've been thinking about my blorbos constantly. I've still been cooking behind the scenes and I hope to get back into it as soon as I can <3
#don't ask how many layers this ended up being adfjhdfkh#i'll get more efficient with those eventually......maybe...#e&s is slowly getting cooked in the bg#probably will need to write just about the whole thing before publishing#brr is on pause for the moment while i get some of this oc brainrot out#i'm excited for y'all to meet wis and her clone sisters properly :>#drop by the otas server for a ton more on them~ we have fun!#my time at sandrock#mtas#mtas qi#mtas builder#mtas wisteria#shady learns 2 art
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