#me being 21 today 💜💜💜

[gxtzeizm]

this is how your (mini) birthday celebaration looks like when you're still stucked on your uni because you're still have another one exam left for tomorrow 🙃🙃🙃

[canirove]

My neighbour Rúben | Chapter 21

Author's note: And we've made it to the end 😔 Hope you guys have enjoyed this story even if it isn't the very best out there and the plot isn't groundbreaking 😅 But sometimes you just need to read something cute and simple, and that was my aim with this. As always, thank you very much for reading and all your support. It means a lot 💜

Previous chapter

Masterlist

It had been a month since my fall at the Etihad. Since I had made it to the news because someone had reported that the woman rolling down the stairs was Rúben Dias girlfriend and that that was the reason why he had run to her aid half way through the team’s warm-up. Turns out that I wasn’t dreaming when I thought I had heard his voice.

And, of course, after being on tv now everyone knew about us, my parents included. After a few calls from my mum asking me how I was, she had finally convinced my dad to come visit me in Manchester, see with her own eyes that I was actually ok and that I wasn't lying every time she had called me, and also meet Rúben.

“Can you please stop? You are making me nervous” he said.

“I can’t. This is huge, Rúben. Like… huge” I said, dramatically lifting my arms in the air. “It’s not just that my parents are coming back to Manchester after ages and the possibility of us fixing things, but also ruining them forever. They are coming to meet you too. My boyfriend. The first I’m introducing them to.”

“Hopefully the last one too” he replied with his usual smirk.

“God, I hate you” I said, back to pacing around the living room. 

We were meeting at Lucy’s apartment since she and Julia were out with Rodri getting to know each other a bit more. Though Julia was already as in love with him as she was with Rúben.

“I love you too” he chuckled, those three words being something I still hadn’t been able to say despite being what I felt. 

“Urgh, that’s them” I said when I heard the door’s bell. 

“Relax, it’s gonna be ok” Rúben said, putting his hands on my shoulders. “I’ll charm them the same way I’ve done with your whole family.”

“Yeah, sure” I said, with a nervous laugh.

“I will. This is gonna work, ok?”

“Ok” I said, taking a deep breath.

“I love you” Rúben said.

“I love you too” I replied, not realising what I had said until I saw the smile on his face. I loved his smirk, but this one… This one had just become my new favourite smile.

“C´mon, let’s go meet my in-laws. We don’t want to keep them waiting” he said, taking my hand and walking towards the door.

━━━━━━❃━━━━━━

And all that, takes us to the present day. 

"Do you know what day it is today?" Rúben asks me as we walk towards our apartment. Because his apartment, is ours now.

Lucy and Julia have moved to Rodri's house, where she is loving having a huge garden to play football with him. Though what she is loving the most, is the idea of becoming a big sister in just a few months.

"It wasn't planned, it just happened" Lucy shrugged after sharing the news. "But I know he is the one, and not because every single person that knows me has said it. It is because I can feel it. It is different to what I've felt with all the other guys I've been with before, my ex included. He is the one."

After they left, Rúben asked me to move in with him, and I obviously said yes. Now I still take care of Julia from time to time when both Lucy and Rodri are busy, but I am not her nanny anymore.

"I'm 6 now! I don't need a nanny, that's for babies" she said one day. 

What I keep doing tho, is being her piano teacher. Hers, and a bunch of kids from her school. We’ve kept the piano at Lucy’s apartment, only going there for my lessons so we don’t bother Rúben. But besides teaching, I’m also playing at events and weddings all over the country. It doesn’t matter if they are posh or tacky, if they have a low budget or lots of money. If I like the people I’m playing for, I say yes. 

My dad didn't like the idea at first and said that, of course, I should focus on teaching. But when he saw how much I was earning by playing on those events, he changed his mind. And I want to think that the fact that he was seeing me enjoying playing the piano for the first time in my life, also had something to do with it. 

And things have also kept getting better and better between us. He has joined grandad and I at some Arsenal games, and Rúben got to charm him just as he said he would. Though I must confess I still am getting used to how well they get along. Seeing them laughing together feels so weird… 

"Do you remember or not?" Rúben asks me again when we make it to the front door, the new doorman opening it for us. Roger retired and he is now living in the countryside with his wife.

"Wednesday?"

"That's now what I asked. The number."

"Eh… 10th?"

"Urgh" he says, rolling his eyes. "Today, three years ago, we met for the first time. And it happened here, in front of this lift."

It had been three years already. Three years since I met Julia at the shopping centre. Since Lucy asked me to work for her. Since Rúben and I crossed paths on this same spot and I just froze in place. He was the most handsome man I had ever seen, and he still is. 

"I remember the way you looked at me" he chuckles. "You couldn't stop staring."

"I probably looked like an idiot. Or a creep."

"You looked very cute" he says, calling for the lift. "I couldn't stop thinking about you, about who you could be."

"Really?" I ask. He had never told me about it, about what he had felt when we first met. In my case, I didn't have to tell him. As usual, my face had said it all.

"Really. I don't know what it was, but there was something special about you. It felt... Different."

"Lucy would call that the one feeling" I chuckle.

"The what?" 

"The feeling you get when you meet the right person. The one" I say, walking into the lift.

"Interesting… But you know," Rúben says, walking behind me and pressing our floor's number. "This lift isn't just important because we met here for the first time. It also is important because it brought us together again."

"Oh, please. Don't remind me of that day."

"It wasn’t that bad" Rúben says with that smirk of his.

"The beginning was really bad. The end, not so much" I say, mimicking his smile.

"That's what I thought. And here is the thing" he says, stopping the lift.

"Rúben, what are you doing?"

"Listen to me" he says, taking my hands on his. "You just said it yourself, that what I felt when I first met you was because you were the one. And it's the truth. You are my one. The one I want to spend the rest of my life with. I had a list of things I wanted to tell you, but I’m too nervous and I've forgotten most of them, so I'll keep it simple" he says, letting go of my hands and getting on one knee. "Will you marry me?" 

"Rúben, I..." I mumble, watching him get a small box from his pocket and opening it, the most gorgeous ring I had ever seen inside it. "Are you sure?"

"I've never been more sure or serious about anything in my life. So I'll ask again, here, on this lift that brought us together. Twice. Will you marry me?"

"Yes" I say, my voice shaking. "Yes, Rúben, I will marry you."

I barely give him any time to get up, throwing myself at him and kissing him. A kiss, that three years later, keeps feeling and being movie worth it.

"I love you" he whispers, his lips still on mine.

"I love you too" I reply.

"But before we keep making out, can I put this on your finger?" he says, showing me box.

"Yes, of course."

"I hope it fits" he chuckles. "Lucy said it was the right size."

"She knows?"

"She knows" he smiles. "And she was right. Perfect."

"Wow" I say, inspecting it closer. "It's beautiful, Rúben."

"Do you like it?"

"I love it. Though not as much as I love you" I say, kissing him again.

"We should probably go home, don't you think?" he says. "Continue with the celebrations there."

"I like how that sounds. Very very much."

But the moment the lift's doors open on our floor...

"Congratulations!" our friends and families scream.

"What the..." I mutter, my heart on my throat. "What is this?"

"A surprise party to celebrate our engagement" Rúben says, hugging me from behind.

"So… they all knew?"

"Yep" he replies, kissing my neck.

"What if I had said no?"

"Oh, c'mon, that was impossible" Lucy says, coming to give a hug. "He is your one, remember?"

"He is, yes" I say, looking at him while Rodri and Ivan congratulate Rúben, a big smile on my face. "He is the one."

━━━━❃━━━━ FIN ━━━━❃━━━━

[saiyanprincessswanie]

Welcome to Week 157 & 158

As always these will be listed in no particular order. None of these stories are mine. I’m just signal boosting them. Author is listed next to title. My goal is to signal boost writers and spread positivity in the community.  💜💜

Click HERE to see what I will or won’t read. This is very important.

Click HERE for past reading lists.

My Masterlist click HERE

Please make sure you’re reading the warnings on every story. They range from dark to fluff. Do Not Read if you are under 18 years old. These stories are meant for adults only. You’re responsible for your own media consumption.

Page-break by @whimsicalrogers​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​ & header by me

If you can, please reblog these lists so they can reach more people on Tumblr.

I love you 3000 💜 Missy

Our Dream, Your Nightmare - Part 3 - (Steve x Reader) - @saiyanprincessswanie​

Secrets Chapter 22 - (Steve x OC, Brock x OC) - @nekoannie-chan​

Clocking Out - (Bucky x Reader) - @navybrat817​ 

When the Clock Strikes - (Ari x Reader) - @navybrat817​

The other dimension - (Steve x Reader) - @nekoannie-chan

new rules - 14 - (Steve x Reader) - @syntheticavenger

Lloyd Oneshot - @imyourbratzdoll

Nothing but Time - (Curtis x Reader) - @syntheticavenger

Yenzy Preview - @drabblewithfrannybarnes

Biker Ari Oneshot - @angrythingstarlight

I'm Not Supposed to Play with Boys - (Ransom x Reader) - @georgiapeach30513

Precarious Agreements Oneshot - (Ransom x Reader) - @sweater-daddiesdumbdork

Suit - (Steve x Reader) - @nekoannie-chan

Barnesy's Disney Wallow - (Bucky x Reader) - @drabblewithfrannybarnes

Mutual Needs, Reluctant Desires - @spectre-posts @what-is-your-plan-today

Biker Bucky Oneshot - @angrythingstarlight

Light that Lamp (1/?) - (Ari x Reader) - @drabblewithfrannybarnes

Early - (Steve x Reader) - @nekoannie-chan

Trash Stache - (Lloyd x Reader) - @georgiapeach30513

Property of Lloyd Hansen - (Lloyd x Reader) - @georgiapeach30513

Too Good to Let Go - (Andy x Reader) - @angrythingstarlight

His Inheritance - Part 21 - (Steve x Reader) - @jtargaryen18​

Terms and Conditions - Pros and Cons - (Andy x Reader) - @navybrat817

Smuggled - (Steve x Reader) - @drabblewithfrannybarnes

Pick you up - (Ari x Reader) - @holylulusworld

A Love for the (P)Ages - (Bucky x Reader) - @jobean12-blog

The being - (Steve x Reader) - @nekoannie-chan

Thio (1) - First meeting - @holylulusworld

House Arrest (4) - FIN - (Lloyd x Reader) - @holylulusworld

I don't wanna - (Steve x Reader) - @nekoannie-chan

Fallen - (Bucky x Reader) - @jobean12-blog

Bucky Oneshot - @angrythingstarlight

Keeper of his Heart - (Jake x Reader) - @drabblewithfrannybarnes

Oh, so Hopeful - (Johnny x Reader) - @drabblewithfrannybarnes

On Bended Knees - (Bucky x Reader) - @slyyywriting

Terms & Conditions - Negotiations - (Andy x Reader) - @navybrat817

What if…. Ari came home - @drabblewithfrannybarnes

Heat - (Ransom x Reader x Ari) - @stargazingfangirl18

Quench - (Ari x Reader) - @stargazingfangirl18

Just Right - Chp 4 - (Steve x Reader) - @darsynia

[livealittleoc-cb]

Happy 21st Birthday Jay!

💀: I am 21 now and I don’t know how to feel…hey! At least I’m legal to drink in the states *snorts and laughs* I didn’t really plan anything for today…I got a hair cut and dyed my hair red so that’s something. Ace and everyone else is being oddly secretive today and it’s starting to creep me out. I know they have something planned and I want to know what-.

♥️: *giggling in the back*

🩵🩵: @monsterhigh-cb [🐟🤍💍 && ⚡💙 && 👻💜 && 🐺💕 && 🎤💖 && 👑💛] @evicted-oc [☕️🤎 && 🐼🖤 && 🔦💛 && 🧊🩵 && 💄🖤] @theinvitation-bot [🐭🩶💒] @welcome-to-maniac [🐇🖤 💍 && 🌻❤️ && 🌕❤️‍🔥 && 🐿️❣️] @fantasyaespa [🐈 💚💍 && ☀️🩵] @k-venturetime [🍓❣️] @multi-joong [🌧️🧡💍 && 🎨💚] @kardpackcb [🌙💝 && 🐺❤️‍🔥]

possible new residents: @faywithlove @badbf-cb @clubwnderland @domxbot @welcometosector1 @lunaaofthemoon @reve-rv @multi-esme @the-hellhounds @san-cb @jinju-oc @enhanced-cb @lavienrosecabaretxo @oppositesattraxt @domrachaa @hwangsiblings-oc @coffeexdreamcb @silcntxnight @moonlightchn @blogger-yura @crimson-l @thesugaredalchemists @folklore-cb @doom-bc @hearthstone-apothecary @vandalsxcb @redlight-cb @inferno-cb @damnationinc @moongoddesselene @darkloversxcb @urluvlyfe @9ateez-multiau-bot @minsour-r @jeonsoyeonn @onlyomega-cb @obsession-cb @mxthxbot @k-half-blood @k-dislyte [DM + / -]

[jimiminily]

Jin is officially discharged from the military! 🥳🎊

Welcome back Jin 🫶💜

It has been 548 days/18 months/1.5 years

(enlisted: Dec 13, 2022

Discharged: June 12 2024, today!)

Welcome back Jin 😊🥳🎊💜🫶

Firstly it feels so unreal TT im so happy Jin is back, I am really really proud of him. He did so good in his military journey, I'm actually really stunned

Oh I love him so much I can't describe the feeling

He's the first member that got enlisted, now he's the first one to be released/discharged from the military 💜

Now nothing can take him away and that's a relief ☺️💕 finally his military is over

Let's stay forever and together 💜

Welcome back loml 🩷

Today he got discharged and behind the gates you could see him bidding farewell to his military friends, they were all hugging and shedding some tears 🥹

and the members greeted him in front of the military gate, and Yoongi was at HYBE waiting (for reasons, iykyk), and it was such a beautiful moment 🥰 haha Namjoon came with a saxaphone playing dynamite, everyone was hugging each other ☺️ but Taehyung became really buff, in such short time?? They all became a little bigger/buff, and Jimin hugging Tae and Jin looked so wholesome and cute especially with tae 🥹 precious Jiminie🩷

It was great to see hobi and jungkook again 😌💕 I miss them all

Jin arrived at HYBE and started live, I missed him so much omg 😭🫶 it sounds super unreal to watch him start live, he was still in his uniform and shared stories from the military, showed his awards/certificates etc.

I noticed his voice became a bit deeper and he talks a little bit differently yknow like a soldier but that's obvious because he spent a really LONG time in the military, and that is SO adoring 🥹💕💕 the way he talks, the voice I don't know why it is so adoring to me I missed him so so so much.

he's so adorable I'm starting to tear up again Hhahahaha it's been such a long long time🫠 welcome back Jin 😌❤️

Remaining members left to be discharged:

• Hoseok: 127 days left (17 oct, 2024)

• Namjoon and Taehyung: 363 days left (10 june, 2025)

• Jungkook and Jimin: 364 days left (11 june, 2025)

• Yoongi: 374 days left (21 June, 2025)

And these are the links to the weverse posts and live from Jin ♡ (added translations), also a link to BTS long awaited ot7 picture on twitter

@BTS_twt todays tweet on twitter

[Translation] 'I (went) and come back'

______

[240612 Jin 🔴 Weverse Live: D-day]

🐹 hello everyone, its been such a long time. bangtan! hello its bts' jin. its been a year and a half. its been so long since being in front of a camera and im not too sure what to say but ill try my best. ah whys the screen turning back in my day it worked so well

normally im much better looking but at my discharge ceremony earlier i cried a bit so im a bit swollen. and i came back to the company and the staff greeted me with posters and everything and this flower *brings out huge flower* oh okay go away now *tosses flowers*

🐹 I came into the building and all the staff were there with a huge bouquet and telling me welcome back! I was so happy and the tears came. I cried twice.

As a soldier, I was telling the soldiers that they shouldn't cry, but they were crying and they were soldiers I spent a year and a half with and I cried.

🐹 Everyone, I've been discharged. It's been a year and a half and I wanted to look good for you but. *shows certificate* It's official. I got a lot of awards. I think I recieved 7-8 awards.

🐹 There was another soldier named Kim Seokjin in our unit so they called my name out twice and I got confused.

my friends also made and wrote me this poster. ah im embarrassed to say this but i was really popular in the military so the posters written with tons of words. they said to read it at home so im going to read a bit here

🐹 This guy wrote me asking to greet a girl group on his behalf

🐹 You dude, see I have only 3 celebrity friends

LMAO THIS ONE GUY WROTE A MESSAGE WHERE HE WANTS JIN TO PASS HIS GREETINGS ONTO SOME GIRL GROUP AND JIN'S LIKE I TOLD Y'ALL I ONLY HAVE LIKE 3 CELEBRITY FRIENDS?

🐹 "Seokjinnie-Hyung, thanks to you I had so many experiences I will never forget. Thank you. I'm glad we were able to have such good food and good memories. To get to chat with, get scolded along with, live with the world star I was fan of since middle school, it was an honor.

I wasn't scolded though. Cuz I was an ace.

🐹 now! i need to talk about festa. i gave some good ideas but it was criticized! i proposed something for festa since ill have to do it alone, so i talked to the director in charge of festa around oct/nov? but they said theyve already said theyve planned most already. so i suggested a free hug, and they said no. so i pitched my idea of doing a free hug at an outdoor location where we do festa. but they said people could get hurt. but i kept saying i wanted to do it for a month or so because i wanted to hug those who have waited for me. so the company was in discussions, and they proposed that instead of a free hug, how about indoors where one person at a time is let in, and i tried to argue against saying i wanted an outdoor one. and they also said i should only do 50 since its the day after my discharge but i said no, 3,000 people and they finally agreed to 300, and i said no as much people as possible, and they said 500 and i said no, more and we finally agreed on 1,000 people

and this is something i personally wanted to do, so im not sure if the other members will do it. i dont really want this to be pushed to the other members as well. this is purely my interest although i was proposed other events such as fan signs. but i really wanted to do hugs

🐹 i discharged today right? so i havent had much to prepare, but i will do something, but i havent had much to practice and i havent sung in around a year and a half, and i rode in the car with jimin today and we've both talked about how we both are out of practice

now that im a free civilian, i will come to see you often!

i will express my heart to all of you tomorrow!

and i asked cameras to be allowed (t/n: to the festa event) so i hope everyone takes lots of pictures

🐹 our ARMYs who waited for me, thank you the most and love you

🐹 on June 13th, I will— AH IT'S TOMORROW*LONG GASP*

🐹 TOMORROW ! I'll express my feelings/thoughts to you

🐹 ill see you tomorrow! i love you army! thank you! 🫶 bye~ bye~ bye~~ 👋

______________________________

💬 BTS WEVERSE POST JIN/SEOKJIN 240612 (1)

'The company has prepared for festa hard, the free hug idea that I talked about was just something I said, everyone ㅠㅠ what I said about coming up with the idea together it seems the context was delivered with the wrong meaning ㅠㅠ

And since there's a lot of people for hugging tomorrow, I request you to pass by quickly ㅠㅠ it will be hard to have a conversation and it's expected go as planned smoothly if you pass by quickly after a quick hug.. looking forward to your cooperation [cutely] ♡'

-------

💬 BTS WEVERSE POST JIN/SEOKJIN 240612 (2)

'Thank you so much to the people and reporters that came and took pretty discharge pictures, and thank you so much to ARMYs that came in front of the company and gave me love because of my discharge

i couldn't give my proper greetings in case it would get too chaotic but i'm so so thankful ~♡

our ARMY are the best'

______________________________

💜 TOMORROW BTS 11th YEAR ANNIVERSARY! 13th JUNE! 💜

Jin will be there tomorrow with ARMY's (big events) Like hugging 1000 ARMY's 🥹

See you tomorrow again Jin 💕🙈

[afreakingdork]

Weak Spot - Chapter 21

RotTMNT Donatello x Reader

Warnings: Aged-up Turtles, Romance, Meet Cute, Villain Donatello, Cussing, Crushes, Xenophobia, Fear, Intimidation, Implied/Referenced Suicide, Hurt/Comfort, Love, AFAB Reader, Vaginal Sex, Sex Rough, Sex, Penis In Vagina Sex, Creampie, Teasing, Scent Kink, Sexual Tension, Breeding Kink, Multiple Orgasms, Cunnilingus

Synopsis:  Though it hadn’t come easily, as these things rarely do, you found yourself in a whirlwind romance with a handsome and mysterious mutant. His idiosyncrasies had been easy to ignore as attraction grew into something more. However, will love endure when the unknowns about him end up being far darker than you ever considered?

Also available on Ao3

First 💜 Previous

Week 1

You: Let’s see how this works?

You: Okay… I wasn’t sure if I was going to get an auto message each time one failed. It just notes it with a little red mark on the message itself. Not too bad.

You: You probably don’t care about that or already know.

You: These probably aren’t the first messages you wanted to read when you got back

You: I should have thought of something more poignant like…

You: It’s been one day and I miss you already

You: How was that?

You: I didn’t stand a chance against my roommate. She crashed into the bathroom this morning when I was trying to change my bandages saying she knew something was up. She was furious.

You: Not at you though!

You: The injuries read accident to her, like a car accident or something? Her voice was so loud. Stupid concussion is killing me. Hard to make sense

You: She made her point though. She was pissed I hid it from her which is fair.

You: You know you straight up said you were gonna tell me what happened. It was the classic I tell you, you tell me

You: And yet!   

You: I still don’t know.

You: …

You: I don’t know

You: Work catered today, they want to start up weekly catering. I feel like this is one of those things where they’re going to give us a dumb perk so they can take something really messed up away

You: I saw a video where they were discussing supposed new and revolutionary tech. It doesn’t even come close to the few things I’ve seen of yours. Is it frustrating to know society is so far behind you?

You: So Kaleb has a cat now! He literally came home from work and there was just a cat in his apartment. He got her checked out and she wasn’t chipped. He’s still going to put out notices just in case, but she has already taken to sleeping on his stomach. He’s a goner

You: Her name is Graham Cracker 

You: I found 20 bucks on the sidewalk today!

You: Seems lucky, but I’m sort of afraid of luck these days

You: Oh

You: I guess I never told you about that…

You: I haven’t seen those other stupid turtles

You: It doesn’t feel like I’m being watched

You: I feel like I would know, but I’m also not sure

You: Bored today, how about a play by play

You: Breakfast was these microwave mini quiches. It feels so fancy, but it takes a minute and the party sized box means I got food for more than a week!

You: There’s a lady walking and eating a bowl of chili at 834am. I want to know more about her life

You: One of my cubicle mates is coughing up a storm. I heard one of my co-workers ask why she won’t go home. She says she can rest better at work. No fine, just get the rest of us sick.

You: Lunch break! I tried making onigirazu after we had them from that shop, do you remember? They were so good. Mine taste okay, but look terrible. Eh.

You: I don’t usually succumb to the midafternoon slump, but lately I just don’t feel like I have much to look forward to.

You: Wait that sounds bad…

You: Moving on!

You: Freedom!

You: Ugh the whole apartment smells like beans, why has my roommate done this to me!?

You: She also like made dinner so I guess I can’t complain too much

You: Tastes good

You: I’m supposed to progress like business is usual

You: Go through my normal routine

You: Act like nothing happened

You: But something did happen

You: Sorry, I shouldn’t even write this.

You: Disregard

Week 2

You: Some of these packages are straight up unfair

You: Like it started out with cute little things like that monstera spoon

You: Which I’ve already used to strain veggies by the way!

You: But this sticker pack?

You: Like sure I mentioned this show meant a lot to me as a kid, but how did you know which character was my favorite?

You: There is no way you hacked anything to get that info!

You: Could you tell based on my other interests? Do you know me that well?

You: So… I’m not proud of this and full disclosure I went to your apartment last night

You: I guess it’s not your apartment anymore

You: It’s not like I could get in

You: I was sort of drunk and ended up there

You: I just wanted to see it

You: Everything is happening and it feels real

You: I go to work, I see my co-workers, we eat lunch, we do work, I commute home, I see my friends, I see my roommate, but it all feels so fucking hollow

You: Just

You: Anyway, Sheldon was pissed. He kept buzzing my gauntlet over and over

You: He won’t talk to me.

You: I mean obviously he wouldn’t I knew he wouldn’t he

You: You

You: Said he wouldn’t it jeopardizes the plan. He’s only supposed to be there to keep watch.

You: I never saw him, just that damn vibration

You: I left after that.

You: I have a major fucking headache so I guess I learned my lesson

You: I’m drinking water by the way

You: Like you care

You: Woof that looks bad the next day…

You: I was in a bad mood

You: I’m sorry

You: Will these messages make sense without the time stamps?

Week 3

You: Well?

You: Fuck

You: Stupid ocean of texts and shitty red marks

You: Feels like I failed a test

You: I knew there wasn’t a timeline, but in my mind there was

You: I had to count down to something

You: Three weeks made sense

You: Isn’t that like the meaning of a ‘few’ weeks?

You: I went to the art installation with a friend.

You: It was really cool

You: I took some pictures, but not as many as I said

You: Or I guess that wasn’t really an agreement.

You: We never really discussed how that would go

You: A lot of things left unsaid

You: I wonder what I keep expecting

You: Like are you going to show up when you come back?

You: Will I get a calendar invite?

You: Are you just going to respond?

You: Hi

You: Hey

You: Are you in town and your phone is off?

You: Will I even know when you get back?

You: I know you promised, but I don’t think you ever really got my side

You: Oh shit

You: What are you going to do? Stop me?

You: Fuck you

You: Your self worth sucks shit

You: Ha! You can’t say anything back!

You: Seriously what am I in comparison ?

You: I’m just some stupid human. I’m not special. I’m just living my life.

You: I don’t like think I’m ugly or anything. I’m alright. I’m me at the end of every day

You: But you?

You: Seriously fuck you

You: This sucks because I’m actually pumped I get to say what I’m about to say without your stupid emo interruptions but then

You: It just reminds me that you aren’t here

You: Nope not gonna be sad!

You: Anyway

You: Then there’s you.

You: You’re caring. You’re interesting. You’re mysterious. You put on airs like nothing matters when things matter way too much. Plus you’re gorgeous. You’re strong. You’re cut out of fucking marble. You’re a literal walking sculpture. You’re smart. You’re so smart it's actually stupid AND you’re a great lay which is literally unfair to existence. You shouldn’t be all those things  

You: Like share with the rest of us!

You: Why the fuck would you come back to me?

You: What could I possibly offer in comparison to that?

You: You should be with the prettiest model genius the world has ever seen

You: Why

You: Should you come back

You: It doesn’t make sense.

Week 4

You: I think I was given too much time to think

-

Kicking your door open, you stared into your apartment.

It was empty.

You knew that for a fact.

Your roommate had left that very morning to go see her parents for their anniversary.

You were stuck alone.

What a pathetic Friday night.

What else was new?

Crossing the threshold you simply let your coat fall on the floor along with your bag and other useless requirements that validated your existence. There had also been another package. It rolled uselessly out from your things and over to the two others that you had yet to open from this week. Ignoring them as you had been, you threw a foot back. The door slammed shut from it and, with a flick of the wrist, you locked it.

“Welcome home to the sad life of those left waiting!”

You don’t know why you were being so dramatic today.

Trudging away from the pile, you tread towards the kitchen. You weren’t really hungry, but you’d barely picked at your lunch. Fridays had become a testament to capitalistic arrogance as they were days free of meetings and barely filled with work. Still, refusal to adopt some kind of hippie foreign policy kept the higher ups from making the smarter decision to commit to a four day work week. If they had finally exercised some sense, maybe you could have waited until Monday for your reprimand.

It’s not like you meant to send out the work up to the client with an oxford comma.

By all accounts, it was necessary.

Who has a vendetta against a tiny pen flick anyway?

Wandering away from the counter you had approached for no reason, you changed course for the fridge. Light poured from the empty shelves as your roommate had strategically laid out her groceries so she could stuff the thing with party leftovers when she got back.

You, on the other hand, just hadn’t had the sense to shop.

Why do so when you were out almost every other night?

What was left in the cold storage was sauces and not even the most basic building blocks of a meal. Sighing, you switched to the freezer where there was mostly frost bitten ice cream and a box that was far too large for the amount of pretzels it contained. It would do, but lacked some form of protein you probably needed. Flicking up the edge of some pita that definitely needed to be tossed, you glimpsed a box. Pulling it out, it was some discounted freezer meal you had grabbed in case of emergency. Staring at it, you stepped away enough that the door closed.

You could always order in.

Looking out indifferently, your wallet said otherwise. You were due to get paid Monday and you’d been stretching yourself thin in an incessant need to leave the house.

Avoiding one’s thoughts didn’t need to be so damn expensive.

Giving up, you turned and made the few steps toward the microwave. You only sort of gleaned the instructions before reaching for the device’s handle. Your sleeve lifted and there was a peak of your gauntlet underneath it. You quickly slapped the food in and slammed the microwave closed. S.H.E.L.L.D.O.N.’s silence had been deafening. He wasn’t supposed to respond, you knew that, but that didn’t keep you from whispering to him in the middle of the night.

You were such a fucking burden.

Turning away from the ticking dial, you headed towards your abandoned things.

Your phone was in there.

The device had been essentially glued to your hand for three straight weeks. It was only in the last few days that you couldn’t bear to look at it. It was the same case with the unopened packages.

Waiting had made you bitter.

Waiting had driven you out in an endless crawl of the city.

Waiting drained your wallet and mind.

You were still waiting.

The microwave beeped in time. Hobbling over to it, you did some stirring and put it right back in for its final rotations. It already paled in comparison to its poster package counterpart, but it only needed to be palatable.

As did everything else.

Walking away again, you headed towards the couch and avoided sitting to hover in front of the TV with the remote. You flipped over to a movie you had heard your gossipy coworker raving about and set it right at its opening studio notes. A completed beep sounded and you went to retrieve your sad looking dinner. It was far too hot and you let it burn the countertop as you got a drink. You then balanced it on scorched fingertips back to the couch before hitting play. You sank down into the cushions before you realized you’d forgotten a utensil. Groaning at the prospect, you left the movie playing as you got a fork. On the way back, you bumped your drink as you sat and barely saved it from a tumble to the floor. In retribution for preventing its freedom, it sloshed onto your pants and you simply stared at the stain before giving up to grab your food. 

Dialog had started as you scooped a bite into your mouth. You immediately scrunched up and chewed as if you were forced to. The texture was wrong and the flavor seemingly took on the mealy quality in a way you couldn’t describe. Thinking only that this was the reason it had been discounted, you ate more out of sheer necessity. With a few calories down, you abandoned the meal to watch the movie. It seemed to be something about a match of two close friends whose quirks led them to really only understanding one another. You were curious what had gotten your coworker riled up when a diagnosis occurred.

Suddenly trapped, you were too far in to do anything and nursed your drink as the movie took a haunting turn. Slowly the routine the pair had going for years was eroded and your chest ached. Still in a rising action, something about the thought of them not being able to watch their favorite movie together again got you. Tears were soon streaming down your face and, as the climax hit, warbled voices speaking of fear activated memories you had tried to keep at bay. The end of the movie sort of happened and by the credits you were hanging your head.

The love was platonic.

No one died.

By all accounts it wasn’t similar at all, so why has this of all things broken you?

Squeezing your face as if it were a sponge to wring out excess tears, you stormed to get a snack. Predictably, or cosmically, the cupboards were bare minus a strange jar of pickled rounds you couldn’t identify and a single popcorn bag that was leaking out of a torn corner. Grimacing at the thought of what that might mean, you cleaned out the cabinet as a whole and ended up accidentally slipping off the counter in the process. You mostly saved yourself, but still hit your funny bone. It exaggerated the stupid tears that kept easily finding their way out of your ducts.  Wilting down to the ground and nursing your arm, you stared out across your apartment.

This was all so dumb.

You were being dramatic.

You hadn’t broken up.

You weren’t even taking a break.

He was just gone on a trip.

So to speak.  

It was as if you were pulling a reverse of what should be. You’d opened so strong with Donatello. You’d put yourself out there with a confidence that welled from an unknown source. As things got more serious, excitement blinded you. Seeing him was an automatic hit of serotonin so who were you to examine the cracks that seemed to always form every single time something interrupted that. It was alarming that small absences sent you down negative paths so quickly. It was as if the improbability of him accepting a courting had bolstered you. Without that seemingly assured futility paired with his rapidly increasing reciprocation, things were simply too real. Greater weight meant greater loss. The thought of which chained your heart.

You pulled your knees up to your chest and set your chin atop them. Your mind swirled with anxieties and the many questions left unanswered. You’d determined to keep from thinking for just this reason. It only lead down dark paths. You were isolated and had no one but yourself to turn to. Sinking further down, more tears snuck free. This time had been especially illuminating on that front. Your woes were confined to your mind. It seemed like the closer you got to Donatello, the less you could tell others what was happening. It hadn’t been expressly forbidden, but his matters felt either private or, at the very least, illegal in some capacity.

Sure, your friends had seen your mutant boyfriend, but who would believe you just so happened to be jumped by three more who were coincidentally created in the same experiment to eradicate mankind?

Raising up enough to bump your head back against the cabinets, you thought about the physical healing you’d done.

At least you’d made some strides in some department.

It meant undoing them would be all the sweeter.  

You needed something greasy.

Standing, you checked the time. It was just late enough that the family places were closed, but early enough that people were just heading out for wild nights. With delivery fees still looming overhead, you looked down at yourself. You’d garnered another stain; this one on your shirt. Caring very little, you marched toward the door. With a swift kick, you toppled the pile you’d left there and rooted out your phone and wallet. Pocketing the device before you could see it, you checked for cash and found that lost bill peeking out. It felt like a sort of fate that you hadn’t thought to use it as a tip elsewhere.

Hitting the street, you stuffed your hands among your possessions. Friday’s poise showed in the passersby and you felt schlubby in comparison. Scrubbing your face only stung where the tears salted your skin and you heard a group of guys laugh. Reminding yourself it wasn’t for you, you turned a corner heading towards the closest fast food chain. Though you’d been out most of the week, the irritations of the day and lonely aspects of the night commingled miserably. You did your best to keep the irrational abandonment at bay, but it seemed incessant.

When had you become so clingy?

You tried to remember before, but it all seemed so futile. In the span of your life you had several decades of time without him and yet they seemed to pale in comparison. It was a red flag of your own making and not one you were keen on taking with you whenever he did return. You needed to temper expectations. You had to act like you hadn’t had trouble sleeping or eating. You needed to stop convincing yourself that your little benders weren’t a necessary evil. You knew better. You needed to miss him less than he clearly missed you.

There it was again.

Wincing so hard a few more stupid tears leaked out, you stopped walking to press your sleeve to your face.

It was obvious.

You didn’t know that for sure.

Why weren’t the rationales working?

Dragging the sleeve across your face so hard it burned, you marched with purpose. Sure, French fries wouldn’t solve your problems and were nothing more than another ridiculous balm, but at least they would taste damn good. You saw the glowing beacon tucked a few blocks down. You burned its lights into your retinas in an attempt to drown out the negative thoughts. They had never reared their head in this way and you were clearly losing the battle.

You had a sea of comments from him that said otherwise and yet given space all you could do was second guess every moment.

In a mental scream, you loudly berated the derogatory voices until you finally reached the restaurant. With doors flung open with a little too much force, you headed straight towards the counter. A man there seemed stunned by your existence for only a moment before his lackadaisical attitude kicked in. You ordered and passed him the 20 to receive change back. Pocketing the money instead of fiddling with your wallet, you wandered over to the sparse seating area.

You hadn’t checked your phone since this morning.

That incessant well of hope sprung up at just the thought.

Mentally building a dam of twigs and mud, you pulled out the device. A few wrong clicks with oily hands meant you bypassed the code to instead bring up the camera. Its last setting had been front facing for whatever reason and you caught sight of what startled the employee. Your hair was a mess, your face was ruddy, your cheeks were clearly tear stained, and there was yet another stain you hadn’t noticed on your shoulder.

Did you eat like an animal?

Cursing the makers of frozen food, you stared listlessly at yourself. You were just bitter enough that you could self-depreciate. Bringing the phone up high to at least attempt a flattering angle, you took a picture with the counter in the background. You shot it off into the sea of other texts with red warnings before thinking to add a comment.  

You: Having the best Friday night ever

In a move that you imagined to be like an old gunslinger, you pocketed your device and leaned into a wall. Your eyes felt watery again so you closed them to keep anything else from falling. You wondered if maybe fighting back was the problem. Maybe you just needed to accept that you had always been the reacher in the relationship and, while you berated Donnie at the prospect of making his life about you, you had done so subconsciously as it was the pit you had fallen into. Acknowledgement would help you untangle the sticky web of complex emotions.  

You must have finally run the gambit of grief.

Acceptance was the final step, or so they said. 

Plotting a better tomorrow and a throw away of this evening, the employee called out to you. Pushing off the wall and feeling the smallest bit better, you went to grab your food. The bag entered your grasp and you lifted it off the tray to keep the worker from having to deal with picking it up later. He took the plastic back and you turned to leave. Parting a glance to the lobby on sheer coincidence, you saw several bills lying on the ground where you had once been. Souring and remembering your old west maneuver had probably dumped them, you sighed as you hobbled over to grab them. In a quick squat, you swiped the tender and heard a resounding clatter of something being dropped in the kitchen.

Slowly pushing off your knees into a rotation, there was a scream and then glass seemed to be flying everywhere. Stumbling backwards and falling into an affixed seat, you opened your eyes from where they were screwed shut to see the lights were now out and the entire front entrance was gone. What remained of it was sharp jagged edges of glass and several people running away outside through the now clear view of the sidewalk. Tinnitus set in signifying there had been some sort of explosion and you deliriously fought against it for clarity’s sake. In what was an embarrassing struggle, you managed to get back on your feet as the first sounds reached your damaged ear drums.

It sounded like the rhythmic motions of heavy machinery. 

Vague memories percolated, which you kicked aside as you scrambled up to a corner to peek at whatever was happening. At the register, barely visible by some emergency lighting coming from within the kitchen, was a huge spider-like shape. Two thick legs dug wide into the ground and held up what you identified as the pilot of what must have been a suit. Another arm was then buried into the ruins of the counter while a fourth was wrapped around the employee who had helped you. The appendage brought the man up to the figure’s face where purple light seemed to burn him as his face was contorted in agony.

“I asked you a simple question.”

You nearly dropped your bag of food.

You’d only heard that voice once before.

It had haunted you for a long while, but it now elicited a very different reaction.

“I-I-I-I d-don’t k-know, m-man! I-I-I s-swear!” The employee stuttered and you could see the mechanics coil around him tighter until he had to give up on his grimace to gasp at the pressure.

You also knew that feeling well.

“Looking for someone?!” You planted your feet and shouted out.

The figure stopped dead.

Your heart made for a similar maneuver as you waited.

Then in a deathly slow turn, the figure’s head pivoted to your direction.

Two huge round purple orbs bathed you in their light.

“R-r-run!” The employee croaked.

That wasn’t happening.

It was nice of him though.

The arm released the man and he crashed into a heap somewhere behind the counter.

Mechanics shifted as metal extracted itself from plywood and the arms rotated the figure to face you. You stared up in awe as they then walked over to you in a methodical fashion. With a bend, the two lower arms brought the figure down until he was almost touching the ground. Memories of fear shot high, but they were intangible compared to what was now in front of you. That night had held a misty figure of torment. Even in the dark, the definition you now had painted him in a totally new light. 

He was clearly disheveled. You had a feeling it wasn’t meant to be that way and this costume had been thrown on in a hurry. The collar of the black jumpsuit he wore hadn’t been zipped up all the way and flopped at a strange angle. His hood teetered back on his head to the point where a slight shift would probably knock it off. It helped accentuate the clear circuitry in there that wasn’t being used. A belt came off his shoulder and dangled uselessly down. It directed your eye further where you found one of his pants legs hadn’t been properly stuffed into his boots. 

It reminded you of how you looked. 

It served to further crop up a sort of kinship that then completely squashed the last embers of alarm left at the sight of him. 

“You’re… not scared.”

His voice was so deep; it was strange. Still around his footwear, you moved to look into those glowing eyes. They had been white from what you last remembered. The recall of which seemed particularly distant. It felt like looking back on a nightmare many days after the fact. You understood why the employee had winced though. His headlamps were incessantly bright.

“I’m not.” Despite the light, you couldn’t help but soften.

Though you couldn’t see his gaze, you could sense he looked you over. Whatever he found appeased him because, when he brought his attention up, he had an assured aura. “Pretend to be.”

You nodded before an arm wrapped reached out to you carefully. You watched it openly as it slithered along your hip before beginning to encircle you. Memories of a coiling snake lapped at your consciousness, but still felt hollow in comparison to the terror from before. Though it looked similar to how the employee had been held, there was a gentleness as you were lifted off the ground. It was hard not to smile as you remembered his order. Trying to play the part, you freely let out a yelp of surprise. .

“H-hey!” You choked out as if you were being strangled even though in reality that was furthest from the truth. 

In a turn and with a stomping of mechanical limbs, you exited out the hole while scared protests leaked off your lips. The wrap hadn’t coiled around your arms and so you made a show of trying to wrench yourself free. Crumbling brick rained down and signaled you were about to head up the building. He let you dangle in a trail behind him so you sent one last desperate plea to the workers who watched on in horror as you disappeared out the threshold. Back in the night air, you watched as three limbs mechanically worked their way up the building. It wasn’t exact, but the way the pack moved more methodically than what you recalled. You hoped the light of the city would help you get a better look at whatever his costume was, but from the back he basically looked like a black blob. 

If he were going for anonymity then he was nailing it. 

You breached the rooftop and he took pause. From your comfortable perch, you craned your head to see him fiddling with something. Waiting, he eventually turned towards you incrementally through use of his pack. 

“We’re going to clear the area. They’ve called the police.”

“Gotcha!” You chirped before remembering yourself. “Oh, am I supposed to keep…?”

“Hold on.”

The pitch was still wrong, but it was teetering more towards recognizable. You were only given a useless moment to wonder if he meant to wait or grab something before he took off. In a rapid crawl that reminded you of a skittering bug, he ate up real estate at an alarming rate. You ended up bunkering down into the arm that shifted its hold as if to shield you. When he finally stopped, you peeked out to find you had to be miles from your original destination. He was fiddling with something again and continued to do so as you were lowered to the roof. The arm lingered until your feet were properly on the ground before he turned to you in a rapid rush.

You realized he’d also gotten his boots down and a gloved hand shot out only to freeze just before grazing you. His head tipped down as he did a blatant sweeping scan that ended in a slow trek to your face. In that time, you finally got the open view of him you craved. His jumpsuit appeared to be purposefully clunky in a way that encompassed his form and gave nothing away of what lay underneath. There was purple stripe detail that lined the zipper that wasn’t pulled up all the way. If it had, the collar would probably obscure his snout all the more. The dangling strap held a similarly colored blocky ‘D’ on it that you found to be an adorable trademark. The only parts of his costume that were suctioned to his skin were where the battle shell stabilized around his waist, his gloves, and his black combat boots that continued the theming with purple laces. His legs were dotted with various pouches and pockets further plumping out his pants with little color coded accents. It all hid him away just like the jet black mask that encased those purple eyes. 

It was no wonder the media couldn’t settle on a name for him.

What would someone even call this?

“You aren’t injured.”

“No.” You spoke the phrase as you continued to examine his outfit.

“The photograph.”

You blinked wide before finally turning your attention straight at him.

Stupid selfie.

“Oh…” You grimaced. “About that…”

He straightened slightly as he waited.

“I…” Your gaze hit the roof below. “… had a bad day… is all.”

“You-” He made a noise of irritation and it was the closest to sounding like him yet. You watched his hands come away from you and reach up to his mask. The lights in his goggles clicked off first and you caught a glimpse of his gaze through the colored glass. In one swoop, the goggles and accompanying fabric were in one yanked off and his hood flicked back. Donnie stood in front of you in a huff.

“You-” You corrected. “-overreacted.”

“I-!?” He rose slightly with indignation. “I returned to the city to find evidence of you, distraught!”

“So you are going to acknowledge it?” You added an icy edge with the turn of your chin.

He dropped back down. “What do you mean?”

Anger shot through you.

That didn’t seem right.

“That you’re back! No hi, hello, or welcome! You just destroy a fucking fast food joint without noticing me at all!” You jammed a finger at him, but kept it from connecting. “One month and you’ve completely reverted! Not only did you freak out, you didn’t try to check in with me, and tracked me, with-” You reeled your arm in and threw the other out to push up your sleeve to show your tech gauntlet. “-this!”

He sank slightly into his suit.

“And even now you’re-!” Your breath hitched.

When had all those tears formed in your eyes?

He was back.

Weren’t you supposed to be happy?

Didn’t you have a plan to quell your excitement?

Why is it all you wanted to do was sob?

“Even now… you don’t…” You choked on the bitterness.

There was a click and release. You looked up to find the arms still standing, but Donnie stepped freely away from the battle shell. He closed the short gap between you, but hesitated again with a lifted finger.

“Guilt keeping you?” You spat quietly.

Wait.

“Guilt?” He dipped his head to catch your eye with a sudden urgency. 

You dodged him.

This wasn’t right.

“A nice little vacation.”  You turned an eye on him only on your own terms.

No, you needed to stop.

He was clearly confused. “It was no vacation, I can assure you.”

“Assure?” Your chest puffed out and leaned your head back. “Calm down, you mean? Quell the piece back home?”

Irrational.

“Piece?” His snout crinkled around the word.    

“Just stop.” You seethed and turned away.

You needed to stop.

None of this was real.

You knew that.

Why couldn’t you stop it from pouring out like blood from a wound?

“Y/N, I don’t understand.” He reached up and pulled the zipper at his suit.

“Ugh!” You almost gagged visibly, but were able to barely keep the theatric in check. “Enough stripping already! The costume isn’t the issue!” 

He stopped and stared at you with a hardening expression.

“I’ll find my own way down.” You headed towards the access door when his hand closed like a vice around your wrist. You whipped around in a fury completely out of your control. “Don’t touch me-!”

He had his phone out and was swiping through it.

Horror blanketed you and you yanked desperately.

He let you thrash, but refused to let go as his eye scanned the device intently.

Bile burned your esophagus as you changed course. You shot towards him and he dodged easily in spin. “Stop!” You screeched and made another swipe that he easily outmaneuvered while still keeping your cuff on tightly. Furious, you twisted around in a new way and caught a glimpse of his screen.

It was your text chain.

Stomach bottoming out to nearly your feet, you dug your nails into the hand on you. Blood seeped from the pressure and you sent a satisfied smirk in his direction. The pained expression you hoped to find there was instead dire solemnity.

It looked eerily close to pity.

Enflamed, but beaten, you shrank away as far as he’d let you until he seemed to catch up with the messages.. He then allowed his phone to clatter to the ground as he turned on you.

“Don’t.” You warned, already curling into yourself.

He didn’t speak and released you.

You stood numbly and rubbed your wrist.

The damage there was your own.

Hadn’t you wanted to run?

He was coming close and you shirked away from him.

“Donnie stop.”

Like an unrelenting force, he continued to step towards you.

“Listen!” Your voice sounded thin.

He reached out.

“Don’t touch me!”

He halted on contact with the phrase.

You wanted to retract.

You wanted to scream.

You wanted to cry.

This wasn’t how the reunion was supposed to go.

It shouldn’t have happened tonight.

Tonight was already deemed a waste. 

“I’d like permission.”

You refused to look at him. “For what?”

Just go.

“To comfort you.”

Why?

“Why?”

“I should have found another way; one that didn’t involve leaving you.”

Stop prolonging the inevitable!

Move on already!

All you’ve done is lead me on!

Go be with the perfect being that is clearly waiting on you!

Stop wasting my time!

Stop wasting yours!

The screams were so loud, your knees buckled.

Instead of falling, you dropped to a squat and buried your face into your hands. Your breath was so loud within the cupping, but it still wasn’t enough to quell those raging irrational thoughts.

You heard a swish of fabric.

He was still there.

He refused to stop hovering.

Why did he keep waiting?

Why wouldn’t he just leave?

Maybe you needed to tell him?

He needed to hear it.

Even if you wanted to, you knew you were too pathetic to ever do it.

No matter how much you wanted better for him.

You were too selfish.

You had been waiting so long for his return.

He was back.

Raising up as if puppeteered by an entirely different entity, you felt the night air hit your wet cheeks.

Of course, you were crying again.

You turned your devastated expression on him and spoke through glass. “I’m sorry.”

He was close; as close as he could possibly be with his big body and yet he still hadn’t touched you. He held out a hand and a handkerchief was deposited there from one of his arms of the battle shell even though it still sat a length away. Taking great care in adjusting the fabric in his hold, he blotted your cheeks. It was there that you felt how he’d maneuvered it so he wasn’t even touching you through the fabric.

His staunch following of your direction caused more tears to flow.

Stupid perfect asshole. 

He caught the drips easily.

“I’m a mess.”

He shook his head.

“I have photo evidence to prove it.”

He raised a brow that said he disagreed.

“Why aren’t you saying anything?”

He stared for a moment longer before his gaze sank along with his hand. He stared at the darkened spots where your tears had absorbed into the handkerchief. “My first response needs to be a perfect encapsulation of my thoughts. Though, I am having difficulty formulating one.”

“Silence isn’t better.”

“I see that.”

Shifting off your rapidly numbing legs, you let yourself fall onto your ass.

“I should have realized.” There was a thump of him presumably doing the same. “I could have done something to quell your concerns.”

“Quell, huh?” You responded dryly.

You felt his gaze snap to you. “I ignored your prior insinuation because it was patently erroneous, but I find it alarming that you would bring it up again.”

“Bring up what?” Your legs were still a tangle in front of you and you hiked them up to bury your chin into your knee.

“That there could be anyone else.”

How many times would you force him to say that?

“It makes sense.”

“It doesn’t.” There was a shift as he somehow scooted even closer to you with nary a graze.

“Keep that up and we’ll need a microscope to prove your following orders.” You flicked him a harsh glance.

“I’ll supply one.”

“Donnie.”

“There is no one else. Not here. Not in the Hidden City. There is-” His hand appeared first as an anchor by your hip and then his face as close to yours as could be. “-only you. There has only been you since we met.”

You were glad your lips were pressed to your knee because it kept the questions from sneaking out.

“I will reassure you as many times as is necessary for you to believe me.”

After a lengthy blink, you finally turned a watery eye towards him.

“It does not ‘make sense’ or, however you chose to put it, otherwise. I have never entertained anyone as I have you. I also can’t imagine doing so. Do not depreciate your worth. You have no idea how valuable you are. I will admit, though, that I am unable to be objective in that regard.”

Your head rose from its perch and shook ever so slightly as you stared.

“You had openly shared your concerns regarding abandonment prior. I should have realized that, no matter the circumstance, this was analogous.”

Your mouth turned down threateningly and levered the well of your tear ducts.

“I cannot make up for the time we’ve lost, but you can be damn sure that I will not allow anything to separate us again.” There was a wicked edge to his eye that spoke of things set into motion that were probably best left unknown.

“Why me?” Your knee dropped down, leaving your torso exposed.

He gave his patented look. “I believe you were the one to attempt pivoting that statement through the other’s lens.”  

Your brows knit.

“I could ask you the same, a stalemate.”

You shifted, opening yourself up all the more. “Why don’t you worry about me finding someone else?”

He squinted as if that were impossible. “Why should I?”

You pursed your lips and turned away a little. “Sorry, ‘Mr. Perfect.’”

“Setting aside your sarcasm, I just acknowledged fault, i.e. the enemy of perfection.”

“No.” You gave a sigh as you changed positions to face him. “I was being rude because you apparently think you’re so good that I couldn’t possibly go after anyone else.”

His gaze flicked away as if he were waiting for some joke to be called. When one didn’t, he returned with honest confusion. “For the sake of this… thought exercise, and I want to remind you that it is such and thus hypothetical on all accounts, that I would know the moment I came into contact with you, if you had been unfaithful, but, again for the sake of the exercise, I will ask, why would you cheat on me to begin with?”

“We’d have to be dating.”

His head bobbed as again he searched for the camera crew before returning to you with an affronted look. “We are.”

“Are we?” You lowered yourself under the weight of nerves.

“We continually go on dates, you’ve slept over nearly as much as you did your own apartment… We are by all accounts romantically entwined.”

“Your…” You could only find earnest intent across from you. “That’s something you have to establish!”

Donnie pinched the bridge of his snout. “I did!”

“Uh, no, you didn’t!”

Donnie shook his head like he couldn’t believe what was being said. “You told me I had to clarify when I asked you out and then I did exactly that. I didn’t mince my words and you accepted verbally.”

You stared openly and searched to find no such memory. “I have no idea what you’re talking about!”

“All this time-” Donnie growled and brought a hand up to push between his eyes like he had an oncoming migraine. “I don’t know what’s more concerning; that you somehow didn’t realize or that there was even a possibility you could go to someone else.”

“Donnie!”

Donnie dropped his arm and stared at you with fiery determination. “Would you like to date exclusively?”

“… Yes.”

“Would you like to be monogamous?” A venom leaked in there that said he would fight otherwise even though he offered the choice.

It brought the bud of a smile to your lips that you fended off. “Yes.”

“Then we are officially confirmed, though I refuse to acknowledge this as an anniversary. Voice your agreement.”

The grin blossomed against your will. “I agree and also, you’re keeping track? You don’t seem like the anniversary type.”

He shot you a biting look which he quickly traded for recognition. “Was that the source of your insecurity?”

You opened your mouth and closed it to turn away. “I want to give a flat yes, but… no. It’s clearly more.”

Donnie nodded slowly. “Is there anything I can do?”

You shook your head. “This has all been terrible timing. I… I literally just decided tonight to start working on this…”

“This being…?” 

“You name it: negative thoughts, doomsaying, self blame, fear of abandonment...” 

Carefully, he placed a hand to the ground near you. His fingers twitched as if he wanted to touch you, but resisted by digging a pad into the roof. “Was there a particular revelation?”

You gave a single dry chuckle. “You could say that.” Your head tilted as you stared at his hand. “A bad day led to worse thoughts. I’ve been fighting it, but I’m weak.”

You could feel offense rolling off your partner.

“I’m clingy, needy, and, apparently, super insecure. Logically, I knew it was all… illogical, but the bad thoughts just kept coming. I feel like a huge hypocrite.” You fought the urge to curl up. “It’s barely been a month and I worked myself up into such a tizzy that I convinced myself there had to be someone else. Not because I had evidence or an inkling, but because I just… thought so little of myself? … I guess?”

One of his fingers curled and stroked the uneven surface below in an attempt to soothe himself.

“Even now, I believe you. I hear you. I want to be happy. I can feel it submerged beneath this stupid ocean of doubt that I am; that we’re finally official.” You shot him a look which he caught with a tired expression. “To me.” You clarified before dropping your gaze. “Which is great, but it’s not an instant fix. The doubt is still there even though I know it isn’t real. Us… being close. It’s like an imposter syndrome that doesn’t set in until we’re apart and I can see it. Like no matter how close we get, you’re destined to leave.”

Donnie stopped and spread his digits out flat.

“I’m sorry. This isn’t the reunion either of us wanted…”

“The kind doesn’t matter.”

You looked up at him to find that he was also examining his own hand. “When you say it like that, it sounds like it doesn’t matter that I’m upset.”

He chuffed before looking at you, deadpan. “I despise when you’re upset, but reuniting, no matter the circumstance, was my top priority. It was always meant to be the first action upon my return. I would have preferred to take you in my arms, but I am also to blame for that failed occurrence.”

“What… happened? What were you thinking?”

“I wasn’t.”  He responded too quickly before relenting by tossing his head. “I emerged from a portal with my phone at the ready. I sent the retrieval code and allowed the messages to filter in. While they were dispersing, I messaged S.H.E.L.L.D.O.N. to see if you were home. He replied that you weren’t so I switched back to our text chain and that’s where I saw… that photo.”

In a shift of your body weight, you pressed a hand near his and leaned onto it.

“I’ll admit the next actions are a blur outside of the single drive to eradicate whoever had the notion of harming you.”

You have a small smile. “Kinda hard when it was a movie and me.”

“A movie?”

You mocked a wince before rolling your eyes. “Even more dumb; it was nothing like us, but it was just some sad flick where one friend dies… Nevermind, the point is the thought of them not being able to hang out anymore hit me wrong.”

He made a noise of comprehension before his silence tugged your eye. You looked to find him thinking, but there was a hostile air to him.

“You’re not going after the writers, directors, or whoever!”

“Hm?” He looked up and you could see the plastic veneer of how synthetic his surprise was.

“Quit! It’s a story! Some movies are sad!” You blew a puff of air at him and he turned away from it.

“I suppose that leaves you.”

“Yeah…” You looked over at his battle shell. “I’m not gonna win that one.”

“I beg to differ.”

You gave him an audacious look, but he simply returned it with a neutral one that spoke of nothing else. “Huh.”

“A glaring weakness.” He said simply before returning his gaze to his hand.

You tried to imagine what that was before another image sank it and left goose bumps in its wake. “Take me in your arms? Were you daydreaming about me Donatello?”

The sudden use of his full name in a casual manner seemed to jar him though he fended off physically doing so. He let it linger before his expression shifted to a tender one. “May I?”

You weren’t sure what he was asking, but your lips moved. “Yes?”

He rose up and you felt grounded by the intense look he shot you. He then leaned in threateningly close and brought an arm up. Instead of catching you, it simply hovered as a cage around your shoulder as his nose leveled out with yours. “You plagued me to the point where it interfered with my work. It was the inability to contact you that was the true torment. You have no idea the amount of times I considered popping back into the city. It only need be long enough to glimpse you in a futile attempt to quell that inane distraction if only for a moment.”

You shrank away and hoped to fall into his arm. 

Still trapped by your order, he adjusted to keep you from doing so while leaning farther forward to make up for the space. 

“You-?” A shudder interrupted you, but you forced your eyes open through it.

“Missed you.” His gaze flicked to your lips then back to your eyes for clarification. “I missed you.”

A tear ran down your cheek and you watched it try to pull Donnie’s eye. He refused it and you launched yourself at him. With your arms encircling his neck, he allowed you to knock him clear to the ground. There you refused to let go and buried your face into his collar. You felt his arms hovering and you had to turn just enough to speak out. “Please. Hold me-no-whatever you want. Just anything, please.”

His arms came around in a crushing force and you happily accepted by desperately rooting as close to him as possible. It took far too much wiggling for what could have been comfortable, but you eventually settled with your legs slotted between his, curled up on his plastron. He rubbed at your back in both a soothing and hungry motion. You butted your head further against his and he dipped down to bury his against your hair. He paused suddenly there and you felt him take a deep breath. He then made a noise of irritation before doing his own desperate jostling. You giggled as he scrubbed manically at you with his head. The faint scales of his cheeks tickled yours and he got a grip on the back of your head to keep you in place while he did his work. It wasn’t until he stopped, gave another testing sniff, and let his muscles relax that you finally chanced questioning it. “Something off about my smell? I haven’t taken a shower yet.”

“There was no trace of mine.”

You blinked wide before propping yourself up with elbows to his plastron to look down at him. “Yours?”

“Mine.” He repeated firmly though his gaze clearly indicated it was meant differently.

You shrank down to join your hands around his chest. You let the heat in your cheeks smolder before a little counter thought buoyed you. “It goes both ways since… you are my boyfriend after all.”

You felt his whole body give a single second tense at the statement before his arms reaffirmed their encircling. It gave you time to reign in your overwhelmed emotions. 

When you came to, you felt sleepy. “How was the Hidden City?”

“I saw little. I tucked myself away into a lab and only left a handful of times.”

You tried to picture him surrounded by proper lab equipment. “You did say it was no vacation.”

“Indeed.” He quieted and you felt one of his thumbs begin to draw lazy circles around the small of your back. “We can go one day, on our own terms. I’m sure you will be stunned by the beauty there.”

“Not you?” You hummed, shifting your chin against his pectoral plate. 

“Never.”

Against your body’s protest, you hoisted yourself up again. “I don’t want to go then.”

His gaze dipped to you genially, but his head continued to lay flat. “Not interested in making memories anew?”

“Giving better context is fine, but hearing you actively dislike it makes me less curious. We’re making memories just fine. Plus, it’s hard for me to care about a place I didn’t even know existed until a month ago.”

He smiled, satisfied, and closed his eyes.

You sank back against his chest and grew still until you could just feel the faintest rise and fall of his breath. With the terrible voices finally tapering off in the face of Donnie’s dedication, you gave a single snort as you remembered something.

His finger tapped you to communicate his question.

“There was one real downside tonight.”

“And what’s that?”

“I didn’t get to eat the food I bought. I honestly have no idea what happened to it.”

Donnie gave an amused snort of his own.

“What?” You pouted even though he couldn’t see it. “Sure, it’s crap and cheap, but I still wanted it.”

“Look up.”

You had a question on your lips, but, as you shifted to obey, you heard the movement of his battle shell. It walked over until one of its mechanical arms outstretched and held a paper bag overhead.

You rose up in time with your arms to take it with both hands. “What the…?” The arm released and you immediately felt the heat. “It’s still hot!?”

“My battle shell has a warming function. It’s obviously not fresh, but-”

You ignored him to scrambled off and sit cross-legged beside him with the bag between your legs.

He grumbled as he forced himself upright.

You pulled out your sandwich and unfurled the paper slowly, savoring the scent that rushed out. You then sank your teeth into it and took a huge bite. Coming away to chew, you threw your head back and gave a happy hum.

Whatever latent ire Donnie had melted away and you could feel him watching you with affection.

Swallowing your bite, you dunked your hand into the bag to retrieve some fries and held them out to him. “Thank you.”

He exchanged a look between them and you several times before leaning forward to bite down. You released as he took them and watched as he cutely chewed them up into his mouth with rabbit-like imagery. He caught your enamored staring and you shirked away from his smirk to take another bite of your sandwich. He leaned back and planted his arms out behind him on either side to lazily gaze skyward. You scootched over until you were slotted against his side and leaned into him. You then continued to eat while routinely feeding him fries. Savoring your meal, you eventually finished and flopped against him to bear nearly all your weight. He accepted it easily and sank down until he could lay his head against yours.

You nudged him affectionately and lamented how greasy your lips were. You doubted he’d want to kiss you like that and internally sulked. In a gentle shift of metal, the battle shell dropped down and created a backrest for both of you. When you leaned into it, it then shifted for added comfort and to create a protective barrier around you. Pacified in nearly every sense, you stared up at the stars as everything else felt insignificant. It meant when a voice did reach you, it felt particularly far away.

“We are to not decide actions for the other solitarily.”

You hummed your affirmation.

“Are you conscious enough for this conversation?” Donnie craned his head and appeared in the top right of your vision.

“I’m up.” You twisted your body some so you could watch him.

“How do you feel about what I did tonight?”

You tilted your head, about to think it over, when he continued.

“Barring the tracking and overreaction.”

Raising your brows in comprehension, you gave a little nod as you thought it over. “I probably should care more about the property damage, but it’s just some dime a dozen chain. Well… wait. Does it hurt the franchise owner?”

Donnie studied you carefully, but his features gave little away. “And the employee?”

Shifting as he ignored your question, you frowned. “Did you hurt him?”

“Nothing lengthy.”

“And franchise?”

“It’s easy enough to look up ownership in addition to their insurance policy. After the Krang, most businesses in New York are required to carry a level of supernatural coverage.”

Krang?

“Why do you ask?” You really didn’t want to sit up, but the conversation was begging you to.

He was quiet for a long moment. You watched carefully as his eye held a heavy quality before he sent it upwards towards the sky. “With your permission, I’d like to slowly bring you into my world. Given lengthy time to evaluate our options, I’ve determined ignorance is no longer your safest course.” Dropping his withdrawal, he looked down at you with a sudden lighthearted air. “You think I, of all people, would have realized knowledge is one’s greatest defense.”

“You’re the dumbest smart guy I know.” You beamed up at him.

He soured into nearly a glare.

“Don’t worry. You’re still mine and I wouldn’t have it any other way.” You leaned up to peck him and paused as you remembered the grease.

He noticed and reached down to something you didn’t care to look at. You were carving his image back into your fresh memory when the crinkling of paper followed. His hand then appeared with a brown napkin. You shot him a smile before taking it to wipe your face. When you came away he was obviously presenting his cheek. You played up a show as if you were forced before leaning in to give him a kiss. Right before you made contact, he turned and caught your lips with his own. Trying to downplay how he’d caught you off guard, you decided to get him back by deepening the maneuver with a sudden ferocity. Air rescinded as he sharply inhaled in surprise. 

Coming away only enough that when he spoke his lips brushed yours, he asked, “Your response?”

“Yes, all around.”

“Good.” He pulled another kiss from you in a slow way that made the way your lips resisted separation all the more apparent. “Do you like Italian?”

“Food?” You had to pull back to laugh. “I mean sure, we’ve had it before.”

A little content rumble came from his chest as the arm around you pulled you back to him. “There is an event I’d like you to attend as my date. It will send a message. I will not be surprised again. Is that agreeable?”

“S.H.E.L.L.D.O.N. was right. You are possessive, hm?”

“Then it is a good time to mention that another factor in all of this is selfishly wanting you by my side. Always”

This time you stole a kiss.

He was growing more hesitant to pull away, but he seemed to want to say something else.

You decided to be the one to interject “It’s another ‘it goes both ways.’”

Against his will, his eyes grew owlish.

You dipped your voice down and ghosted over his lips as he had you. “You’re not the only one who wants the world to know who you belong to.”

In a growl, he flipped you and crushed his mouth to yours as the battle shell reconfigured into a sort of supportive seat. You made out until you heard a fist bang against metal. Donnie then rose up with anger painting his features. “Incessant!” He growled and looked down on you. “As much as I’d like to continue. I have one more obligation that must be fulfilled.”

“Yeah?” Your lips throbbed, kiss bruised.

“A stipulation of our agreement was him being able to see you as soon as you were cleared, safe, and content.” Donnie sat back on his knees and brought his arm up. It was then that you realized his gloves had disappeared long ago. Remembering the way they had once grown, it made sense they could retract similarly. With a shove, his sleeve pushed to his elbow and he tapped his tech gauntlet with excessive force.

“Him?” You wondered aloud, though the word hadn’t actually registered in your mind.

As if to answer your question, there was a sudden droning sound coming in fast.

You shot up, nearly crashing into Donnie as you searched the sky.

You located the faint glow of S.H.E.L.L.D.O.N.’s rotors soon enough and stood ready as he crashed into you.

“Careful!” Donnie hissed, softening your impact with an arm behind your back.

“I’m sorry, Y/N! I’m so sorry! Having to listen to you every night and not being able to respond broke my metaphorical heart! You have no idea how many times I wanted to say screw it and come see you! No matter how dumb the whole thing was, the safest decision was not to, but that doesn’t mean I have to agree. Just know I heard every word and I’m gonna so make it up to you! I’ve got a whole list! Just like the things you mentioned! It’s gonna be awesome!” S.H.E.L.L.D.O.N. outpoured in speech so fast you could barely keep up.

Donnie sparked and looked down at you with wide eyes. “Every night?”

You looked up at him sheepishly. “Uh…”

“More than you were texted. That’s for sure.” S.H.E.L.L.D.O.N. remarked proudly.

“S.H.E.L.L.D.O.N.!” You barked before turning to Donnie apologetically. “It was different. I knew he was there-”

“It’s alright.” Donnie cut you off and you could see he was already sinking into a self-depreciation you knew all too well.

“No!” Not letting go of S.H.E.L.L.D.O.N., you shot to your toes and then had to do a jump to catch Donnie’s lips. The first kiss only made contact with his chin and he jostled awkwardly at the move. His gaze met yours to find you sitting firm with narrowed brows and fiery determination. S.H.E.L.L.D.O.N. buzzed out a teasing syllable as Donnie dipped down into reach so you could kiss his worries away.

NEXT

Also huge shout-out to my betas @tmntxthings and @thepinkpanther83!

[exo-wvrse-bbl]

28/03/24 - chen

Soondaengies Hello??!💛 Thank you for posting pretty hearts🫶 🫶 They were perfect 😎 There were really various kinds💛🩷💚🤍

Oh, the heart color was too limited ❤️🧡💛💚💙💜🩷🤍🩵🩶🤎🖤 Suddenly, a heart match 🤍ᩚ What I was 1 minute late looking for emoticons… Jongdae hour ㅜ🫠 That emoticon? ㅋㅋㅋ 🤍ᩚ

I searched it on the Internet and it was very diverse 😎 Anyway, it's a bit unfortunate that I missed Jongdae time while searching for a heart emoticon? ㅋㅋ I was searching on the internet ㅜ Oh my gosh ㅋㅋㅋ

I won't miss it next time 🦾 Tomorrow is already Friday I think a week goes by so quickly What if you open your eyes and it's Monday? 👻 It's sad ㅋㅋ Monday, go away ❌

But come to think of it, the weekend hasn't even come yet ㅋㅋ But it's already Monday 😎 Go away! Monday, don't come It was fine Shall we enjoy the rest of today?😎

Let's go!! Like Monday Let's listen to a song together 🎵

This is also a memory ❤️ Oh!!!!! 21!!!!!!! I got goosebumps I found out for the first time today..

Then… also Adele👍

There were a lot of Soondaengies asking what 21 was 😎 Why is my circle crooked ㅋㅋ Before, when I took a picture of the sky, I put a sign in the corner It was really hard ㅋㅋ

Shall we change the atmosphere?? There was a concept of the day of the week for the songs in this album, right? It's perfect for our conversation today 😎

Tada~ Let's Now! Today Happily Shall we wrap this up?❤️

See you tomorrow ❤️ Thank you for being with me today as well 🌻 Let's play again 🔜💛

source in desc

[notsuchasecret]

Beloved friend, please do a ramble for me about your top three current favorite characters in WIPs and how they would cope with this disgusting summer heat. 💜

Frond! Thank you for the ask I love you too! 🫶

I live in the desert. Today, we had the lowest temperatures of the week, 111F (43.9C) for the high. It was a massive relief from the 120F (48.9C) we've been having. I'm dying.

So I super haven't been writing fanfic lately (gasp), which means these will all be original characters. They're also all from solo projects rather than what I'm working on with my writing partner, so they don't get as much attention as some of the others I have, but they are my babies nonetheless 😂

Ramble time!

Havervath Fontain (working name) (21 Lives) is, like, the literal worst kind of person to be around when the weather's like this. This little shit would make it everyone else's problem. You know those people who experience a minor physical discomfort and decide to cope with it by breaking the Geneva Convention? Yeah. He's the platonic boytoy of a king, too, so he doesn't face consequences ever, and he's going to keep it that way thank you very much. Hate this asshole. 3/10 do not recommend as a summertime buddy, unless you can get him to bitch about someone you dislike, then it might be entertaining.

Hyacinth Jones (Charming) is used to the heat. She doesn't have an air conditioner, and she doesn't want her roommate to waste too much of her magic cooling down their apartment. So she's gotten very good at things like wet towels on the neck and wrist and putting a block of ice in front of the fan and finding the spots with the best shade. She's figured out things like airy fabric in light colors to keep her skin safe without having a lot of weight on it. Upon moving into the palace, she can absolutely be found in a sports bra and her husband's wife's boxers, sprawled spread-eagle on the floor somewhere, enjoying all the glory of being the one percent, with 0 guilt about it for once. 8/10 - she may or may not make the space you're in actually cooler, but she at least has a good sense of humor about it.

Chimera (The Silverleaf Sentinels) spends as much of the summer as a little mouse with big ears tucked away in a hole somewhere as she can. If one of her friends drags her out by the tail to go be a human person she will, but they've got to find her first. -/10 - you don't spend time with Chimera in the summer. It's not possible.

[gxtzeizm]

Hello my dear Iz, I hope that I'm not too late to wish a very very happy birthday !!! I saw that you are quite busy the university but I sincerely hope that you still had some time to enjoy your special day. I wish all the very best because this is what you deserve. I'm always so glad that we have you here, you're our little ray of sunshine <333

Ps : I hope that Bayern will have the decency to treat you well today !!!

hello there lise my dear bestie!!!!!!!!!!! well it's never late for you to give a birthday wish to me tho so dw 🤭🤭🤭....but anyways...

THANKS A LOT DEAR FOR THE WISHES!!!!!!!!! NO BUT THIS IS TRULY MAKE ME DAY RN 🥹🥹🥹....also yeah i'm so glad a bit that my final exams for this semester ending tomorrow tho that at least i can have a leisure time for me during this semester break for a month <33

anyways once again, i really appreciate it so much and also....what an adorable fanart tho lise i love it sm 🥰🥰🥰 (okay idk why but i assume that you drew mario actually...but still it's really cute!!!!!!!!)

ohhhh not to forget, i really hope so that bayern will get their shit together today 😭🫠

[scribblespirit]

Happy Valentine's Day!! 💝 (+ long personal ramble lmao)

Well I did intend on posting earlier than this, but I wanted to wish a big happy Valentine's to everyone who actually follows along with the random crap that I post on this site-- and an especially big hug to all of my fellow aspec, arospec, and aroace lovelies!! I've always valued the celebration of all forms of love on February 14th, whatever dumbass society that we live in who decided that it's strictly a holiday for romantic couples can show themselves out the mfing door. Romantic love, platonic love, familial love, s*xual love, queerplatonic love, polyamorous love, animal love, ALL types of feeling & showing love are so wonderful and deserve to be celebrated!! If you feel sad about being single on Valentine's Day, don't let our stupid economy blind you to how loved you are in many different ways by many different people!! 🫶

On that note, this year marks a very meaningful occasion for me personally. I'm currently 21 years old, I learned I was asexual when I was 16 and didn't understand that I was arospec too until I was 20. I've always been totally content either celebrating Valentine's Day with my close friends, or basically ignoring the day all together. But as of last summer, I am now in my first Queerplatonic relationship with my incredible partner @rubinaitoart (and our beloved @lovelucigoosey, who is always with us 🎗️🩵) and I thought that today would be a fitting day to finally proclaim my cheesiness online lol! Rubin, I love you so so much and I'm seriously so lucky to have you. Thank you for being my very first Valentine's Day partner, for making me feel so loved I nearly happy-cry every time, and for just always being your supportive, talented, caring, funny, amazing and beautiful self!! 💜💜💜 /p

My patience to see your smile and give you the biggest hug face-to-face is dwindling with every day, but also knowing that we will get there someday is one of my favourite things to think about :'D To my online besties, Checkmate or otherwise, thank you for being the best long-distance found family I could ever ask for!! Every one of you guys means the world to me, I'm so grateful that you all put your care and energy toward a little chatty bundle of emotions like me. My bucket list purely consists of a list of each of you guys, and I will not quit until I get to properly see and hug all of you or else your name is not getting checked off of the bucket list!! But yeah fr thank you guys I fuckin' love my friends I don't know how I got so lucky 🥹💕

To my kittens (not that I expect they'll be reading this), thank you for being such little fluffballs of joy and chaos. Thank you for coming upstairs and insisting to check on me when I have been face-deep in homework for 6 hours, and for dragging me away for cuddles whenever I need it. To my parents (who definitely won't be reading this XD), thanks for being some badass and wonderful parents.

To Luci, I mean I check in pretty often so you probably already know what I'm gonna say. I hope you're happy, I hope you're smiling, I hope you're running and I hope you're free of pain. Love you always boo 🩵

I just have so much love in my heart that I wish I could share as much as possible. I love my family and my kittens and my friends from university who help keep me somewhat sane. I love my Discord friends/found family who help keep me very sane, and are always there to make me laugh and to celebrate achievements together. I love my queerplatonic boyfriend/partner, I love his voice and his hair, I love his obsession passion for The Arcana, I love his fluffy puppy Aster, I love how he makes me smile and that I'm capable doing the same.

Thanks guys. I really really love you all ❤️

...

(Also I haven't slept in like 38 hours and I'm struggling to stay awake as I write this so I hope it is at all legible, it's probably too long but quite frankly if you read the entire thing and made it all the way down here then massive kudos to you. I did warn that I was chatty and emotional, those two traits never go well together 😂)

[marengogo]

3 YEARS WITH BTS 💜🙌🏾🎉

THIS IS BTS on Spotify. On Random starting from VIBE.

[Music is a very big part of my life and I’m MOSTLY INCAPABLE of writing without music, so I just thought I'd share what I am listening to while writing this]

–🐺–🐺–🐺–

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME,

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME,

I’M SO GRATEFUL TO BE ARMY~~~💜,

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME!

I will NEVER FORGET how I was like “Damn they are trending uh? … let’s see what they got?”, I clicked on the following link and THAT WAS IT FOR ME.

though I became obsessed with that particular performance of ON, which brought me to check out ON KINETIC MANIFESTO, and got me to add ON as a favorite song on spotify, which I listened to everyday as I went to work. I still couldn't imagine the me of today. 

I then decided to listen to the whole of “Map of the Soul 7” and not gonna lie, I would have the following songs on repeat, every day:

ON never the SIA version, sorry SIA 🙏🏾

Black swan

UGH

Filter

It even got to a point where I would listen to only Filter on repeat 😬😬😬 … Mind you I still didn’t know who any of the members were by that point. Eventually I decided to take a look at the members and I started and ended with the leader 😂. We seemed to have so many things in common: English not being our first language, love for anything intellectual, reading, etc. I couldn’t get past RM. So it was MoTS + RM for me. But nothing serious yet, life still proceeded as normal.

Full into COVID, I had the worst sleeping pattern still do, but that is a different story. So I just so happened to be awake when on August 21, 2020 Dynamite premiered. I had no idea what a comeback was, or anything associated, I just watched as the seconds counted down and then watched this colour video: I WAS SHOOK 😂😂😂. I also remember very clearly that I made my very first BTS gif out of that video, which was Tae at the very end not sure where the gif I made is now but the scene was the following:

So then I got into Tae, I was like “Who is this Cali-looking handsome thing?”. In the same fashion, through reactions, music videos, interviews, RUN BTS, etc, I started being obssessed with each member at a time, for different weeks at a time 😂😂😂. Eventually having to admit that, even though given the chance I'd marry Kim Seokjin 😂😂😂, I actually loved all of them.

As life kept going on, I had a whole series of firsts (photoshoots, reactions, RUN etc) but it took me up to some time in January 2021 to realise that I indeed hadn’t spent a single day of my life since February 25, 2020 without consuming any BTS related content. OF ANY KIND AND WILLINGLY. From that realisation I then happily dove into the rabbit hole, but also came up an amazing journey of mental health recovery:

I OWE THEM SO MUCH.

Because I can feel getting sappy, and in all honesty I want keep enjoying my ARMY birthday with a smile on my face, I’ll stop here. I guess in a way I need to thank Jimmy Fallon uh 😂😂😂?

LOVE YOU MY BOYS, MORE THAN YOU WILL EVER KNOW 💜 The following was the ever first BTS photoshoot that came across my timeline.

Always so gratefully yours 🫰🏾💜,

Marengo. 

[lunadrawingonthemoon]

First time I post about me and not about my dear fandoms, sorry for the ones who don't want to listen to me.

Yesterday I got my diagnosis which confirm that I'm on the autism spectrum with ADHD. And the feeling is so weird. I'm like so relieved that it's not that I do wrong on purpose, that it's not my fault. I always felt like people outside of my friend group was weird and idk... Having the confirmation that it's not I'm lacking of anything but I'm just born different is kinda nice when you or your mother were blamed my entire life for this.

But also I'm kinda feeling empty, because I don't felt the anxiety of my impostor's syndrome anymore, and it's so weird to felt it cause that just mean that I'm so used to it, I'm so used to be like "you're delusional you don't have anything" that now I don't have this voice at the back of my head... I'm not used to it.

But in general it's positive, even if I have like 1083 new stuff to do cause it's still 21 years going undiagnosed so a lot of work + french administration is always awful (I don't know why they do that) but I'm happier now, it's good.

I also, for my friends here, I love you all, thanks for supporting me during all of this, even when I was in a pretty bad state mentally, being with you, always make me feel better, and don't hesitate I'll be there for you too, I want to be a safe place for you as much as you were for me. For my mutual or just people who happened to like my art, even when I'm not posting often, thank you also a ton, you're also one of the reasons who make me continues drawing even when it's hard for me, because seeing you loving it, made me realize I don't do it for nothing.

Anyway thanks for reading it (I'm so sorry if it's hard to read, I never was the best student in english class), have a great day everyone, love ya all💜💜and pet a cat today, it's neko day (or a Felix... But it's the same thing)

[readychilledwine]

Incoming extra long post 💜

Pushing something a little different today-

Let's talk banned and challenged books

Warnings- this post is going to mention racial and gender issues, violence, and use some foul language. I do not graphically discuss anything, but I want that warning out there right away.

I've gone through 5 different banned/challenged books lists, and I wanted to share with you my favorite books on these lists and why I think everyone should read them.

I want to start with WHO creates the banned book lists and what it is. The banned or challenged book list is a list of books that are not allowed within a school district, and sometimes, when pushed hard enough, public libraries. It is meant to limit access to materials deemed "explicit in nature." It's not made by the government. It's parents and average people create these lists and typically threaten schools if they teach from them or offer these books to kids in libraries. I fully believe and support parents having the right to ease their kids into adult topics, but challenging your kid is the point of school.

I did notice there's common themes in the books on these lists

Race and race theory is discussed in the books

Mental health is discussed in the books

Body autonomy is discussed

The women's rights movement, LGBTQ+ movement, BLM, or any other minority movement it discussed

The book is critical of the government or religion

The book discusses war and the toll it plays

Slavery is ACTUALLY discussed

The book contains sexual content (consensual or nonconsensual)

The book questions society norms

Magic (Yes. Magic)

This list is updated almost weekly in some school districts, and 99% of the time, it is not to remove a book. It is to add one.

A few of these I won't discuss in as much detail in fear I will risk a community guidelines report, but I wanted to discuss some of them and why I love them.

Always keep in mind that you alone are responsible for your reading intake, and check your triggers on all the books mentioned. I will be posting my personal feelings on which age I feel the books are appropriate for as well. I also have not read a few of these in a bit, so hopefully, I have everything as accurate as possible!

If the ✨️ emoji is by the book, it's one of my personal favorites. Like, I may have multiple covers and editions favorite, or it is a book I frequently think about, or it holds a special place in my heart. Without further ado, I present to you Elizabeth's 21 favorite banned books in no particular order:

Maus by Art Spiegelman - banned for discussions of violence, torture, and death- This is a comic book/graphic novel series based on the author's father, who was a Polish Jew and is a survivor of the Holocaust. It is gut-wrenching. It is disgusting. It is heartbreaking. I do not recommend it for anyone under 16, but I personally think it's okay to be uncomfortable and learn from the past.

✨️Animal Farm by George Orwell - banned for open criticism of the government - I LOVE Animal Farm. Animal Farm is based on the Russian government/monarchy being overthrown (which is why it surprises me that it is banned in so many districts in the US.) In summary, animals over throw their human masters and create a society of their own. It is meant to challenge and discuss the fact that no matter how small a person is, the revolutionary mindset is a powerful one. I highly recommend Animal Farm to 16+.

✨️Beloved by Toni Morrison (get used to her name. You'll see it one more time. I could make a post solely on her.) -banned for violence, SA, realisitic depictions of segregation and slavery - Beloved is about the treatment of black women in the south during and after slavery, and how things circled for them. This book has haunted me since I read it at 15. I'm 27 now. Toni is a superb writer who truly pulls at your heart with her stories. I do not feel this book should be banned. What happened in the United States needs to be discussed openly to work on the racial divide. Please consider reading this if you haven't, and if you have siblings 16+, let them read it as well and have an open discussion with them on how it made them feel. This is one I also recommend checking triggers for.

Burned by Ellen Hopkins (you'll see this name several times, too. I'm shocked her name isn't plastered as the first thing on every list honestly) - banned for questioning religion and parental figures - I also love Ellen Hopkins. I have paid to listen to her lecture several times. I love the way she writes. I love her willingness to challenge society. I love her openly discussing hard topics. This book is one of those topics. It is about a young group of kids sent to what my brain thinks is a religious reformation camp in Nevada. They are supposed to be finding salvation and redemption in Christ, but instead find love and acceptance in each other. There's a few heavy topics (the whole book is heavy. Her books, in general, can be heavy). I'd recommend it to anyone 14+.

Call of the Wild by Jack London - if you're my age and grew up in the American School system, take all the time you need to process the fact that this book is on all 5 of the lists I looked at- banned for animal cruelty and violence - this was required reading when I was in school. I was 12. It is focused on the Klondike Gold Rush, and arguments could be made that it is more based on the treatment of animals at that time. I do not feel I should have been exposed to this at the tender age of 12, but I tend to carry more sympathy towards animals than I do people. I feel safe saying 15+ with discussions being had regularly.

✨️ Fahrenheit 451 by Ray Bradbury - banned for challenging the government and violence - I have chills as I am getting ready to write about this book, tears are welling up, this is my coming of age novel. It is one of the books I read by choice in high school that actually began my question everything and look at all angles mindset. I can not recommend this book enough. It is about book and media censorship and a dystopia based society where common practice is to burn books, a real thing that has happened in so many countries, on government orders in order to keep the general population conformed and uneducated. It discusses the consequences of that on society and humanity, it discusses the dangers of rebellion against that mind set, and I could not put it down. 15+. Please please please read this book if you never have. Especially as an adult who can recognize the behaviors discussed in the book and how it parallels modern society

For Whom the Bell Tolls by Ernst Hemmingway - banned for discussions of war - this book graphically discusses the consequences of war. I am not overly comfortable getting too far into it. I will say, this one will shatter you if you are an immeserive reader who gets so into a book it becomes your surroundings and reality instead of just a pleasure reader. Please read with caution. 17+

Lord of the Flies by William Golding - banned for violence and language (I personally think there's more reasons and those two are the scapegoats) - again, if you are my age, take the time to process your shock. This book centers around children who survive a plane crash on an island and are forced to create their own society and government, and it quickly goes to hell in a hand basket. Everything from sex, to racism, to discrimination against disabilities (does it sound familiar yet) is discussed and challenged by the groups formed in this book. 15+ with supportive discussions

Of Mice and Men by John Steinbeck - another one for people my age to go "wait what" to - banned for "depressing themes" and "antibusiness" - this book discusses the tragic lives of two migrant works and the conditions they were forced to endure. It's main lesson is about humanity and compassion. This is a really educational book that I feel should be in classrooms. 14+

Tricks by Ellen Hopkins - banned for SA and sexual nature - this one I would not recommend to anyone under 17. It is about teens trapped in sex work. Please check your own triggers before reading this.

✨️The Crank Triology by Ellen Hopkins (Crank, Glass, and Fallout) - banned for open discussion of drug use and addiction - these novels are actually based on the life of the author's daughter and her downwards spiral into m3th addiction. They are heartbreaking (fallout will hit you HARD if you have friends who are the kids of an addict or you are a child of a parent who is an addict). They were the first books I read by her, and I am sad to say I live in a community where they were banned hard enough that it passed to all three school districts and the public library. 16+ and please check triggers

Hold your breath, my loves. ✨️A Court Of Mist and Fury by Sarah J Maas -banned for sexual content, violence (domestic and situational), and ✨️magic use✨️ - if someone can explain to me why this is the only book from this series I've found on a banned/challenged list and why NONE of the Throne of Glass books are on them, I'm all ears. Do I think your 13 year old should be reading this? F no. A 16 year old, though? Yes. Let them have that Rhys Crease in those paperbacks. I'd rather my kid read smut than watch it. Also, kudos and congrats to SJM for being a banned author in 12 school districts, thus making her one of the top bans for the 2022-2024 school years. There's some great authors and novels on this list. It was pretty cool to get to include her.

✨️The Bluest Eyes by Toni Morrison - banned for race theory, racism, abuse - oof. This one is hard. Be ready to cry if you read it. It takes place after the Great Depression in the US and is mainly about a young black girl. It centers a created inferiority complex she developed because, due to societal norms regarding beauty, She does not see beauty in herself and her skin. Definitely 14+. Definitely should be read in classrooms as it is one of the most powerful books I've read that centered on black women and their voices that need to be heard.

✨️ Milk and Honey by Rupi Kaur - banned for sexuality and representing the feminist movement - this one is quite frankly insulting. This is a poetry novella about healing and finding power inside of yourself as a female and finding your self-worth. It's banned in 10 districts, making it part of the top 10 bans. I might actually cry over this one being banned. My daughter will read it 14, and we're going to discuss it. I think it is that worthy and powerful. I will leave you with my favorite quote from this one "I am not a hotel room. I am home. I am not the whiskey you want. I am the water you need. Don't come here with expectations and try to make a vacation out of me."

✨️ The Catcher in The Rye by JD Salinger - banned for teen rebellion - this is the first book I gave to my younger brother that I thought would resonate with him, he still has that torn up, creased, and notated copy that was passed from my mother to our big brother, then to me, and now to him. He told our parents once he's pretty sure it saved his life. This book centers around 16 year old Holden after he is expelled from school. He begins to challenge adults and societal norms regarding children. It critiques a superficial society and brings to light the consequences of some choices we make. Teens can relate to this book. My siblings and I all did. This book has sat on a pretty much national ban list for far too long. It needs to be brought into classrooms, especially classrooms in schools with behaviorally challenged teens who've never found a book that speaks to their soul and feelings. 16+ with guidance and open discussion.

✨️I Know Why the Caged Birds Sing by Maya Angelou - banned for "bitterness and hatred toward white people" in the majority of the state Texas - break my heart harder, Maya. This is the only autobiography on I have on my tops list at the moment. It focuses on young Maya Angelou and the discrimination and racism she faced. There is so much symbolism and history to dive into with this book. Have tissues ready if you read this. 16+

The Kite Runner by Khaled Hosseini - banned for open discussion of war and violence - another oof. This is another book I handed to my little brother and said, "Read this and get back to me." It was not one of my personal favorites until he sat me down and told me how the book made him feel. I genuinely wish I could have him typing this one out, but he's off doing his adventures and seeing the world. It is a beautiful coming of age novel set in the Middle East during the invasion of Soviet Russia to the United States and the downfall of the Taliban. It centers around the importance of paternal figures, friendship, and key relationships. 15+ there is a SA scene that is rarely mentioned on the banned books list so keep that in mind.

✨️The Lovely Bones by Alice Sebold - banned for discussions of childhood SA, pedophilia, and murder - one of my top 10 favorite books of all time. If you've watched the movie, please read the book. It is about a family struggling after their daughter is SA'd and killed by a serial predator, and it is told from the daughter's perspective in the afterlife and from the eyes of her family. You will go on a roller-coaster of emotions. Anger, sadness, joy. I really do love this book. I have a hardcopy for display purposes, and a paperback with a separate note book filled with notes, quotes, etc. 16+ just due to the heavy nature of it, but for a mature reader and personality 14+

✨️I want to scream from the rooftops on how bullshit this one is. To Kill a Mockingbird by Harper Lee - banned for open discussion of segregation, racism, violence, and "general hatred towards white people - this book should be required reading. This book openly discusses consequences of false accusations based on race, it discusses the mistreatment of minorities, and it discusses a white superiority complex. It needs to be read and discussed, and I will die on that hill. 14+

This one also makes me want to scream✨️The Great Gatsby by F. Scott Fitzgerald - banned for violence, alcohol promotion, anti business beliefs- this book is a classic and it brings to question a lot regarding income levels, old and new money, and financial segregation. It has beautiful symbolism that you have to be paying attention to catch, and is so much more than a Leonardo Dicaprio movie. 14+

It is with a heavy sigh and heart I introduce the next author: ✨️JRR Tolkien✨️ if I would have just listed his books, it'd be this whole list - banned for violence and ✨️magic use✨️ - these novels and short stories are the back bone of the modern day fantasy writer and have even created countless table top RP games. The fact that so many Middle Earth based novels are banned is almost a stab in the back to the idea that schools are supposed to push and celebrate growth, individuality, and knowledge. I have the Lord of the Rings and the books that prequel it on a pedestal. They are my comfort novels and go tos when I'm feeling down and truly want to lose myself into a well-done and built world. I recommend them to anyone who already loves Fantasy or wants to get into fantasy 15+

EDITED TO ADD ✨️Slaughterhouse Five by Kurt Vonnegut - there's a lot of reasons this book is now banned, and I was just informed by my best friend she saw it had hit an official list - If you want science fiction mixed with anti war look no further. This book addresses a very deadly and tragic bombing in ww2 using a narrative from a character who is "stuck there" over and over again. Please really check triggers for this one. It's easily another 16+ book.

Theres a few books I came across on these lists I haven't read yet, but currently have in my cart to purchase. Do any of you have a favorite banned book? Are you interested in any of these books? If you are and have questions, please shoot me a message or comment. I'm always happy to discuss banned books. They're my favorites. 💜

[txemrn]

"Mommy!"

After celebrating M&M's birthday in today's TNA chapter (and with that ending!), how do I not share this amazing fanart I got a few weeks back? Towards the end of the summer, I had the opportunity to meet and commission the very talented @/lizbyart (Check her out on IG). I shared with her my idea, based off of my fic The Home Team, and y'all...

SHE NAILED IT.

Not only is she incredibly gifted (the emotion and the love shared between Brynn and the twins is so palpable, so visceral! 🥰), but she is a joy to work with, keeping me in the know the entire time and making sure I was happy with her progress.

And our fun didn't stop there! We were featured last week by Choices for Fan Art Friday on IG and FB, which was a fun little treat!

Thanks, Liz, for being so amazing, bringing my story to life! Aaaaaand I can't forget @rookiemartin! You are the one that inspired this idea! Thanks, love! 💜

🚨 This is a paid commission; please do not copy or alter any aspect of this art without permission.🚨

An excerpt from The Home Team:

~🖤~

“Mickey?” She yells out, spinning around in the area, “Mickey?” The crowd begins to thin out a path, increasing Brynn’s visibility as she glances around the corridor.

And there he is, holding the hand of a police officer, large tears streaming down his red cheeks. “Mickey!” Brynn screams in relief. Hearing his name, Mickey instantly turns his head towards the familiar voice; finally locking eyes on Brynn, he let’s go of the cop and runs frantically to her, his arms outstretched.

“Mommy!”

Mickey collides with Brynn as she instantly sweeps him up in her arms, holding him tightly to her chest. She feels his tiny, terrified body relaxing into her embrace, his whimpers melting into her comfort. Combing the sweaty curls off the back of his neck from under his cap, she gently rocks him lovingly. “Shhhh… Mommy’s here, baby. Mommy’s right here.”

Tagging my Permas and TNA peeps!

PERMA

@21-wishes @alj4890 @angelasscribbles @ao719 @charlotteg234 @harleybeaumont @issabees @kingliam2019 @mainstreetreader @mom2000aggie @neotericthemis @nikirennie87 @peonierose @tessa-liam

ALL TNA

@annfg8 @bisexualdisasteracd @rookiemartin @sfb123

[helloanthy]

tbh i was kind of expecting vriska at the end of the colors of utena

idk if this is python sending this anon because what a coincidence it would be ! but either way ill take this opportunity to share our conversation about hs/rgu from 2 days ago

🐒 munke [10:20 PM] on my last helloanyhy i drew anthy as kanaya mayhaps i should terezi her this time [10:20 PM] not character parallels .jus anthy cosplay things

🐍 python [10:20 PM] terezi [pog]

🐒 munke [10:21 PM] terezis ur rose bride

🐍 python [10:21 PM] anthy cosplays all the homestuck trolls

🐒 munke [10:21 PM] (makes u into bug cannibal)

🐍 python [10:21 PM] om nom nom nom [me turning myself into a bug and also you so i can cannibalize you] [10:22 PM] terezi's name is razor gillette and shes an orchid mantis

🐒 munke [10:22 PM] my brain is getting chemicaliszed so i cabt mental exercise but bow do u think anthy n vriska would get alkng oe not

🐍 python [10:22 PM] ummm… i imagine something similar to how anthy and nanami get along

🐒 munke [10:23 PM] did u kno ladbugs hav to drill a hole thru the females exoskeletob to creat an orifice to mate [10:23 PM] wohldnt that be heinous [10:23 PM] rips u a new asshole

🐍 python [10:23 PM] vriska: does not agree with anthy's submission so she comes in with a lot of bluster [10:23 PM] anthy: 🙂

🐒 munke [10:23 PM] omg. vrisknami ?+ [10:24 PM] nariska

🐍 python [10:24 PM] nanami is not A vriska, i think, but she feels very adjacent to me [10:24 PM] i need 2 ponder that one more [10:24 PM] i do know i consider wakaba and jade to be similar though [10:25 PM] i think vriska considers anthy to be very boring. so she might provoke her a lot. like how she was w aradiabot [10:25 PM] but also that was bc vriska considered aradia a friend… so idk with a stranger she might just be rude

🐒 munke [10:26 PM] wait ur wakajade parraleld [10:26 PM] i would like to hear defensr

🐍 python [10:26 PM] theyre both sidelined by the plot very heavily [10:26 PM] w wakaba its like lampshaded but w jade less so [10:26 PM] they both couldve been the protag in another comic

🐒 munke [10:27 PM] ahhhh [10:27 PM] rebound girlies ……..

🐍 python [10:27 PM] theyre both aware of how distant they r from the canon… and hate it [10:27 PM] yeas… [10:28 PM] i think the difference is that jade was sidelined bc she was too powerful for the plot. like she is the most involved in sburb of the beta kids (her life does not truly begin until they enter the game) but shes also the least involved in all the big battles bc shes too strong [10:28 PM] the hand of god taking her off the table… [10:28 PM] i think wakaba is just sidelined bc its not her story LOL [10:29 PM] like she HAS her own plot she can be involved in (shes the princess of that other world or whatever and she literally found her prince) but she doesnt want it ‼‼ she wants to be in this one. [10:30 PM] thats all i have maybe theres another utena character who jade is a closer analog to idk [10:33 PM] i think in terms of like… placement irt the plot? vriska's thing is that the story is always trying to sideline her but she (and also the hand of god very transparently) keeps putting her back in. and also terezi did that once too lol. but nanami and vriska share a similar role of … being subjected to a lot of humiliation (plot wise) but also their backstories are a trauma dump. and also ofc the personalities

and today

🐒 munke [1:13 PM] did u send me an anon on hehlloanthy about vriska

🐍 python [1:13 PM] not at all [1:13 PM] what does it say ⁉️⁉️⁉️‼️⁉️‼️⁉️

🐒 munke [1:13 PM] 🤨

🐍 python [1:13 PM] BELIEB ME

🐒 munke [1:13 PM] ok well im ghonna post our conversation about rgu/hs parallels then [1:13 PM] just to share 💜

🐍 python [1:15 PM] okay addendum to what i said before [1:18 PM] for homestuck, rheres a difference between hussie the self insert joke and hussie the wielder of the hand of god. re: vriska remaining relevant via the hand of god. like hussies self insert is an allegory for the narrative going off the rails and out of their control. but ofc like theyre the one still writing and arting for it, so they arent truly divorced from the narrative decisions jn the real world. DOES THIS MAKE SENSE

🐒 munke [1:22 PM] yes

🐍 python [1:22 PM] i just want to circumvent the haters 😈

🐒 munke [1:22 PM] HSFJDFJSKDHFOKDSJ

[that-angry-noldo]

Chatroom || M. Eledhwen, Hurin Thalion

Hurin Thalion is online

Hurin Thalion

18:46 hey

M. Eledhwen is online

18:46 i catched the wifi so i can text you again :)

18:47 how are you doing?

M. Eledhwen

18:47 I have a bad feeling about this

18:47 sorry

18:47 it's just

Hurin Thalion

18:48 hey it's gonna be alright okay?

18:48 it's gonna be fine

18:48 you won't even notice I left

M. Eledhwen

18:49 it's already empty without you.

Hurin Thalion

18:49 i know

18:49 but

18:50 trust me, okay?

18:51 we didn't want this war right? but somene got to show the bastards what are we made of

18:52 i'll be home in few months

M. Eledhwen

18:52 promise

Hurin Thalion

18:53 i promise with all my being

18:54 take care of turin alright? is he asleep?

M. Eledhwen

18:55 yeah

18:55 yeah i think so

Hurin Thalion

18:55 good

18:55 i have to go

18:56 love you ❤️

M. Eledhwen

18:57 i love you too

Hurin Thalion

18:57 :)

~

M. Eledhwen

10:47 hey

10:47 how are you?

Hurin Thalion

19:32 sorry just got the chance to get on my phone connection is horrendeous i hope this sends

19:33 i'm fine, i'm fine

M. Eledhwen

19:34 have you adjusted yet?

Hurin Thalion

19:35 yea yea think so. Sorry i gtg now take care

Hurin Thalion is offline

~

M. Eledhwen

19:56 hurin?

20:12 i hope you're alright.

~

Hurin Thalion

17:48 i'm still kicking don't worry ;)

M. Eledhwen is online

M. Eledhwen

17:48 thank god

17:49 don't die yet

~

M. Eledhwen

16:25 Turin said hi

16:25 I was at doctor today. it's a girl

18:45 alright

18:45 love you.

~

Hurin Thalion

04:32 IT'S A GIRL??? THAT'S AWESOME

04:32 i'm so happy

04:33 i'm sorry i can't text more

04:34 i love you

Hurin Thalion is offline

Morwen Eledhwen

07:16 i miss you

07:16 love you too

~

M. Eledhwen

03:24 f-cking *** i couldn't get a single night of sleep this week

03:24 i'm considering just moving to the bombshelter

03:24 you have my blessing to end them in the most gruesome way possible

03:25 alright, sorry. i love you. take care.

~

M. Eledhwen

15:32 i hope you're doing alright

15:33 turin drew you a card

M. Eledhwen sent a file: i-love-you-dad.jpg

15:34 i miss you

~

M. Eledhwen

02:34 Hurin?

02:34 i can't sleep i'm so sorry

02:34 i knew it'll end up badly i watch the news and it's bad isn't it?

02:35 hurin please i worry so much. please tell me you're still alive

02:36 will you make it out will huor make it out there's so little news but at the same time there's so much news

02:37 i'm so sorry i'm crying hurin

02:38 promise you'll come back

~

Hurin Thalion is online

Hurin Thalion

01:56 +

Hurin Thalion is offline

~

M. Eledhwen

07:04 i love you

~

M. Eledhwen

13:46 the baby was kicking today

13:46 i just thought i'll share with you

13:47 be careful alright?

~

M. Eledhwen

21:02 shellings are f-cking everyday i f-cking hate it

21:02 i hope all of them die

~

M. Eledhwen

13:45 hi dad! its turin! i miss youy. mom has a belly wit a baby and i gonna be a brother again. can we name tgis baby lalaith too? mom sais we cant but i think we shoud. i think you should kill all tge orcs. and come back and we cab be together. you mom and baby. and me. mom misses yoy and sador still can't finish the chair. sador is silly. i love you. say hi to uncle. kill all the orcs. bye! i'll text you again when mom gives me phone. i love you 💜🤐🤔😇🥶🐖🦝🐻🦇🦚

~

M. Eledhwen

12:56 hurin i miss you

12:57 there's not much else to say

~

M. Eledhwen

08:32 Turin asks if you texted back every hour or so i think

08:33 it would be endearing if it wasn't heartbreaking

08:34 i miss you

08:35 please come back

~

M. Eledhwen

15:13 they say we need to leave the city on the news

15:14 i will send turin away

15:15 but i'll stay

15:16 i don't have where to go

15:17 and i can't leave my home

15:17 not again

15:18 i'm sorry i know you said to leave

15:19 but i can't

15:20 i knew it'll end up badly

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M. Eledhwen

16:32 dad it's me turin i text you again. i will leave mom says so. i don't want to leave i have school and friends and sador is staying. mom is staying too and i don't want to leave but mom says i have to. i want to cry but big men don't cry right? you don't cry i think? mom doesnt cry. I miss you come back. i miss you and uncle. and mom is sad and i am sad. i don't want to go. say mom i don't need to go. and kill all the orcs. and come back. i miss you.

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M. Eledhwen

17:35 turin left. rian moves in with me.

17:37 i want to hope but there's so little hope left

17:37 i'm so tired

17:38 please. please stay alive.

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M. Eledhwen

07:08 hurin hurin i think they're entering the city

07:09 oh hurin

07:09 hurin hurin i'm so scared

07:10 please

07:11 please i want to wake up

07:12 hurin

07:13 hurin

07:14 hurin

~

M. Eledhwen

06:44 they're in the city

06:45 they're cutting wires there'll be no communication

06:45 they're checking phones on the streets

06:45 hurin

06:45 hurin i'm so sorry

M. Eledhwen left the chat