#meg has the biggest appearance change for sure

[britishchick09]

the rewrite quartet and daddy daae- 2022 vs. 2021! :)

[baddingtonbitch]

watching the new zac efron movie and i don't think i'll ever get used to the new face. i always thought that the "socks on a slippery floor made him fall and break his jaw" story was very hard to buy since his chin, cheeks and lips all looked suddenly augmented too. i just googled it again and i never realised that he claimed the injury happened in 2013(?!) and that him getting an entirely new face a couple of years ago was because he stopped doing certain jaw exercises. jaw exercises that supposedly kept this whole new face at bay for many years until he got lax about them on vacation. so i'm like ten times more flabbergasted that anyone agreed to accept that story. i know that admitting to getting bad work done is like a mortal sin to celebrities but from the way he spoke about the literal eating disorder he was programmed into for certain roles and the resulting mental health struggles, i think it's totally plausible that he tried to get something "subtle" done out of mounting insecurity and whoever operated on him didn't understand what that even meant and just gave him the stock looksmaxxing package.

and yeah i'm sure that feels horrible and lying about feels like a necessary evil and the whole thing is a mental and emotional prison and that's very hard, but there are so many actresses that went through the exact same thing and didn't get even one percent of the grace he did and were not given the benefit of any doubt when they tried to deny their surgeries. it's just sad that countless women get called liars and "plastic surgery disasters" when they get pressured into risky procedures trying to become some unattainable feminine ideal and treated like vain monsters when it doesn't go as planned, but efron can debut a new face that looks like a meme drawn by an incel, give an extremely implausible excuse and people suddenly think anything is possible and multiple outlets will repeat and legitimise that story as if it adequately explains everything. case closed, no further questions, he just looks like this now and any raised eyebrows are attacks against a FALL SURVIVOR

like one of the most famous prettyboys secretly had this massive life threatening facial injury that required emergency hospitalisation, reconstructive surgery, and a decade of physical therapy somewhere in the narrow gaps between some of the biggest movies of his career and not a single soul knew about it until now and it had absolutely zero outward effects on his appearance until the better part of a decade later when it just happened to manifest as a constellation of simultaneous physical changes that coincidentally mimic the most common masculinising cosmetic surgeries men get when they feel insecure. all at once. permanently. but he says that's what happened so it has to be true, and famous men never ever get plastic surgery and he can't possibly have EVER been vain, insecure, or dishonest.

imagine meg ryan trying to get the public to swallow a story like that and tell me she wouldn't have been crucified for it.

meanwhile it literally gets written into his movies as a cheeky little joke.

[the-other-art-blog]

The importance of a dark skinned Laurie. A matter of representation

I have talked about this issue in a few posts before but I’d like to address a few more points.

Louisa describes Laurie as

‘Curly black hair, brown skin, big black eyes, handsome nose, fine teeth, small hands and feet, taller than I[Jo] am...’

Yet in all adaptations, except the 80s anime, Laurie has been represented as a white character. It doesn’t surprise me that up until the 70s that was the case. However, the 2017 miniseries, 2018 modern adaptation and the 2019 movie make the same mistake: they whitewashed Laurie!

(I’m conflicted in using the word “mistake” cause that implies that they honestly didn’t know. But since they swear they love the book, then it seems more of a conscious decision.)

To me, it’s very worrying that almost no one discuss this in the media during the 2019 press tour.

But a brown skinned Laurie is not just about sticking to Louisa’s description of the character, it goes much deeper. It’s a matter of representation.

One problem that period drama set in Europe or the United States has is that there is little diversity, which makes sense cause they were slaving black people and discriminating everyone who wasn’t white and Christian. If today a show wants to add more variety into their cast, they normally have to race-bend characters or create a fantasy world, like Bridgerton. That or people of color get to play the servants or the poor people or the foreigners who appear in the background.

Yet, here we have an 1868 book, set the Civil War, that features a brown skinned character. And it’s not just a side character, he’s prominent, he’s part of the main characters. He has an arc as important as the main white family.

The fact that Laurie is brown skinned plays into his identity issues.

Just because the North was against slavery, doesn’t mean they weren’t deeply racist. As a matter of fact, Bronson Alcott got into a lot of trouble for offering education to white and black children in the same classroom.

For all the praise that Greta Gerwig’s movie got, I’m surprised very few people called her for including only a couple of black characters. There was one lady who barely had a line and another one at Meg’s wedding who is there just for background. That’s tokenism!

Even the modern adaptation which should have had no problem getting a diverse cast, chooses to cast Lucas Gabreel!

Then there’s the matter of his Italian heritage.

A couple of times, Laurie think about his Italian heritage and not in a good light. Actually his mother must have been the one who passes him his skin color. When he is in Valrosa with Amy, he think his Italian side brings out the superstition aspect in him. Italians have always had a negative stereotype in Western Europe and the United States. I don’t know how difficult must have been for Laurie to hear all these negative comments that attack his mother. This will also serve the discussion of immigrants in the XIX century America, alongside with Friedrich’s case.

Moreover, Italy is also a prominent Catholic country. A few articles I’ve read say that protestant America rejected Catholicism, even to the point of forbidding it. Let’s remember Aunt March’s French catholic maid who change her name from Estelle to Esther so that it would sound more American. This under the condition that the old lady wouldn’t ask her to change religions.

Even with all of these issues, he is in a position of power. He is the heir to one of Concord’s biggest fortunes. He gets to go to college. He is destined to run one of the greatest companies in Massachusetts. Amy even teased him because Fred was richer than him, like it was something that didn’t happen often. So his wealth must have been pretty big.

Returning to the March family, it will also serve to prove with their actions how anti racism they were, not just anti slavery. They included this boy as part of their family almost instantly. He becomes Jo’s best friend and Amy’s husband. It is in the book that a lot of mothers look at him as an attractive suitor for their daughters, but I’m sure some other inhabitants looked down at him for being Italian and brown-skinned.

So, my point is, representation matters.

Imagine how much this would mean for brown skinned boys, mixed race boys and parents of those kids to see this character properly cast.

(I’m curious, how many people knew that Laurie is supposed to be brown-skinned?)

[sloppy-butcher]

I will sacrifice my first born for a part 2 of dare you with joey

well anon, hand it over. give me the baby

edit// this thing is long like godDAMN i need to relax. hope yall enjoy it :)

Part 1: Dare You - Joey x Reader crackfic

Double-Dare You

The Legion (Joey) x Survivor!Reader

The pallet dropped against the concrete wall with a loud whack followed by a disgruntled shout. Joey reeled backward, his head aching from the collision with the wooden object. At the moment of successful contact, you spun around to the killer and passed him the biggest shit-eating grin you could conjure. Joey catches your elation and decides to ignore the pain to instead focus on you. 

“Y’know, I’m still waiting for an answer,” Joey said, his tone casual as if this were a conversation taking place between equals in a normal situation. You rolled your eyes amazed by how stubborn and oblivious the man appeared to be - he would not drop the topic for anything, not even as he chased you with a hunter’s knife poised. “When are you going to take me on that date you promised?” This earned a chuckle from you, fully swinging round to face the masked man with your arms crossed over your chest.

“You’re joking, right?” He tilted his head feigning ignorance. Your smile stretches to an impossible brightness, how exactly this killer always made you feel so giddy and playful was beyond your simple understanding. Perhaps it was because you had never experienced a killer who was so talkative and lively, this being such a unique situation that against your better judgment you decided to humor it and actively encouraged his behavior. It was fun. “And where,” You shake your hands in the air, “would I take you on this hypothetical date?” Joey hummed, standing straight with his knife tapping under his chin in a contemplative manner.

“That should be for you to decide really. Though we could always go check out some cool places. These realms,” he gestures to the weepy forest around you both, “are ten times cooler when they are empty.” You raise a curious eyebrow, demanding an explanation without uttering a word. He sighs and lifts his foot to kick the pallet. “I mean, that cowboy saloon place is pretty awesome on its own. All old-western and shit. But it would be even cooler if it was just us two.” At the sound of the wood splintering, your instinctive reaction was to flee to another pallet leaving the man's comment to fall of deaf ears. Joey followed but stayed far enough behind to not have his skull caved in with another hit. You bring the new pallet down between you two and once again spin around to the killer.

“Tell me again why exactly I have to take you on a date? I don’t remember doing anything wrong.” You spit at him, venom dripping from every syllable of your inherently rhetorical question. Joey smirked under his mask - oh you were a feisty one alright. Cocky and proud even when kneeling at the feet of a predator. Rather than kicking the pallet, Joey let it sit between you two, making it an honorary truce-table. You would not run if he did not chase. And he only wanted to talk. 

“Because you harassed me. Remember?” You shake your head in a mischievous ‘no’ earning another grin from the enthralled boy. God, you were good. Doing absolutely nothing at all but dragging him in all the same. “You smacked my ass,” Joey deadpans, “And you never made up for it.” 

You smile at the reminder of your triumph from a few trials previous. Though you were scared pant-less at the time, looking back now only filled you with the taste of sweet victory. You would not let anyone convince you to do anything like that again, not even Meg with all her stupid, little games even if it did somehow end up with the outcome of befriending a killer. 

“I don’t see why I have to pay anything for that little smack,” You toss your head and throw him a coy eye. You practically see the man shake from restrained laughter and knew that you had him wrapped around your little finger. You could easily manipulate him just as he could easily kill you. You shudder at the glimmer of the knife in his hand but decide to focus on the conversation rather than his purpose being there. “It was a harmless little thing.” You pull your hand up to your mouth to nonchalantly hide your growing grin.

“It was twice.” Joey retorts matter-of-factly. He watches as you release your tense posture, throwing a hand on your hip and rolling your eyes. 

“Oh please, that is nothing really. Besides,” Your gaze falls down to his knife again and you feverishly swallow your mounting fear. “You have done far worse things to me.” At your words and pointed implication, Joey’s confidence plummets to the ocean floor. Of course, you would never trust him willingly, not after all he has done. And though he knew full well that he could just take you if he truly wanted to, Joey denied his animalistic urge in favor of keeping the peace. He wanted to keep your fire - preserve that genuine playfulness that he oh so enjoyed lest he shatters it by forcibly caging you. 

“I know you have no reason to trust me,” Joey’s voice has lost all semblance of the peppy court-fool it was just moments before, catching you off-guard in its sudden change. He lowers his hand that holds his weapon, moving it behind his back so that it was out of your view.  His head drops, the ebony eyes peeking out from underneath his mask glistening with unmistakable remorse. “But, when I say that I don’t want to hurt you. Please know that I mean it.” You wanted to scoff, to call his bluff and his terrible acting skills but something about his tone made you hold back your comments. There was a pure genuineness in his voice that flickered a light of hesitation in your head. Maybe it was your nativity or that stupid part of your brain that always wanted to see the good in people, but you believed him. You believed that he did not want to hurt you. At least not now. 

“What about my friends?” You ask through your dawning affinity, guarding your words with the last ounces of your resistance to him. He was pulling you into him, dragging you down into those deep-as-night eyes. 

“I will let them all go. But only today. Next time I…” Joey turns his head away from you, embarrassed and partly ashamed that he could not even offer you a solid answer. “There are things you don't know. I can only spare you sometimes before It gets angry.” He sighs and his shoulders deflate, making him look pitiful and small. You frown and feel yourself unconsciously step towards him, reaching out to try to comfort the killer. “Please believe me.” 

“I do. I do believe you.” You spoke without thinking, stepping closer to the pallet, and to him. He instantly raises his head at your words and approach, surprised by your forwardness but nonetheless delighted. “For some reason, I do believe you. But I can’t…” You pause, shaking your head free from the intrusive thoughts daring to bubble over, “I can’t be alone with you. Not yet.” Joey understood that completely and a little too eagerly, nodded his head in agreement. 

It wasn’t much but it was a start. And he was beyond happy to be given this opportunity.

“For now, I suppose.” You cringe inwardly as the idea formed in your head and moved into words. “I suppose you can smack my butt if it will even the odds.” Joey nearly fell over at your suggestion. He bit back a laugh and had to spin around so that he could compose himself. You watch as he doubles-over, clutching his stomach while emitting sounds of stifled giggling. After a few minutes, he straightens and faces you again, his expression and tone stone-like. 

“Yes. I think that would suffice.” He narrows his eyes cunningly, “For now.” With your mouth agape in shock, you scoff and throw your arms up.

“Dude! I was joking! I didn’t think you’d actually agree to it?!” You feel your face begin to heat up. The man tilts his head ever-so-slightly and you could physically see his enjoyment growing at the expense of your humility. From the way he was standing so assured in his next decisions, you had the dawning realization that there was no way to talk him out of it now. Sucking back your pride you bite your lip and glare daggers at the man.

“Fine. Just,” You twist your body around, presenting your ass to him. How embarrassing. How humiliating! Every inch of you burned from excruciating pain, birthed from the pure absurdity of the situation as it finally rested upon your shoulders. “Just make it quick!” You practically shout over your shoulder, your face now a burning furnace you were sure was bright enough to light up the night. Joey was overwhelmed by your willingness to oblige and for a second, contemplated if this was even real. Just minutes before he was chasing you, begging you to so much as to stop and talk to him, give him just one single chance to try to reach out. And now, in the most brilliant and wonderful course of events, you had offered yourself to him! His fingers itched, his heart pumped louder than gunshots. 

“Close your eyes.” Joey reactively says without planning or action. He only realizes his command when he notices your confused expression. “Please, trust me.” Your face flickers, shifting between utter bewilderment and denial. Then something clicks and you agree, closing your eyes and squeezing them shut. Joey goes to break the pallet, its job as instigator between debating parties no longer necessary. You flinch at the sound and fight the inherent urge to run from it and the monster behind the noise. Suddenly you feel him closer, the brushing of fabric against your bare arm lets you know that he was standing right beside you.

Ordinarily, killers breathed obnoxiously, panting loud and hard like hungry wild boars with their teeth bared and frothing saliva dripping from their bleeding lips. But as the man neared you, coming closer than you had previously ever allowed him to, he was quiet and gentle as a bee. Buzzing around slow and tentative, asking for you, a sweet flower, to open up and let him rest. He held back that part of him that had scarred you so many times before, confining the violent boar in favor of being human - if only for a moment.

Joey’s heart threatened to pump straight out of his chest, the hammering so boisterous in his ears that all he heard was thumping and all he saw was you. Your lip twitches, your eyes furrowed shut tense as his shadow covers your face. He slowly lifts up the bottom of his fabric mask, careful about his movements so as not to alert you. You were so much like a rabbit, frightened and easily spooked - he could not risk losing you now that he was so close. So close - close enough to…

In the blind obliviousness, you grow impatient, wondering why he had not already taken his chance you return his ass smack tenfold. But as you went to open your mouth to curse his slowness, a pair of lips land ever-so precariously on yours. Light as the cool breeze of a winter’s morning, so soft that you doubted they were even there. It was only when you pushed up into them did you realize their fullness. The man was kissing you - if you could call this weak excuse of a peck a kiss. He was scared to force himself on you, scared to chase you away if he let loose his full eagerness to consume you, and in doing so barely even allowed himself to touch you. You appreciated his controlled reluctance and as your boldness grew, so did your pressure into the embrace. You deepen the kiss and you feel the man shudder.

After a few seconds, the man pulls away gasping, his hot breath cascading across your flushed cheek. You stand there a moment longer with your eyes closed, unsure of what to do after this peculiar sequence of events. You feel the man move his lips once more to your tender face and place one last kiss on the corner of your mouth. 

“The name’s Joey by the way.” He whispers into your skin, his voice a creamy, dark mess. The power you had over him, even in something as simple as a shy kiss, was immeasurable. Joey knew he couldn’t be around you for much longer lest he does something regrettable so begrudgingly he lowered his mask and stepped back. He looked you over one last time before sprinting off into the foggy abscess in that unnatural speed of his. You watch the whiteness consume his form and scream after him, 

“That was not part of the deal!” But Joey was long gone before the first word had even left your mouth. Suddenly you couldn’t wait for that date.

[sasuhinasno1fan]

You see the real me

Hey @komorebirei, I’m your @lukadrien-winter gifter! Before we got our assignments, I had been rereading a lot of Sarah Dessen and Meg Cabot books, so this is kinda based on Sarah Dessen’s book Just Listen. If you have read it, don’t worry, I made sure it didn’t have any of your triggers in it. I hope you like it. I based it off one of my favourite scenes from the book. Mentions of ‘the cult’ and Nathan are from Divergance by @depressed-teacup-inc and @sarcasticsparkles (TwiglightMaster15). Hope you enjoy!

Clara Nightingale played from the speakers of Adrien’s computer as he dialled the number for the radio station.

“MIRC Radio.”

“I wasn’t at the mall to see Clara Nightingale; I actually know her,” Adrien defended. He then realised Luka would just use it as an excuse to tease him more.

“That doesn’t exactly clear you of being there,” Luka said. God, he walked right into that one.

“I had a meeting for the fashion show? I’m surprised Rose didn’t tell you.”

“She was more focused on seeing you and getting all that stuff from the swimsuit store. Also, why is Paris’ biggest model doing a fashion show at a mall?”

“You mean, the biggest mall in Paris that holds a total of 30 different stores that sell my father’s clothes? Kinda don’t have a choice.”

“Woo of being a model. Any chance you get to choose what you eat?”

Adrien raised an eyebrow. “Lunch on Friday was a bag of chips. What do you think?”

“Fair enough. Come get breakfast with me. It’s a tradition after every radio show. Nathan’s paying.”

Adrien thought of the red-haired bundle of energy. “Sure.”

“We’ll be at your house in 20. See you then.”

Adrien hung up and closed the webpage that had the radio’s website on it. Usually, he would sleep in on weekends, unless he had any photoshoots. But like many things that changed after the summer, waking up to listen to the radio was a new thing. All Adrien wanted was to get through school without any issues. Not that a certain person would make that easy. And of course because he made stupid decisions that pushed away any friends he could have had, Adrien was alone. It was like when he started school again.

Then…Luka. After a confrontation he’d rather not relive, Luka came to check on him. Even after seeing him hide in the boy’s room and actually get sick, he was there with tissues and water, asking if he was ok. It had been so strange then. To everyone, Luka was the weirdly silent kid who hung out with a ‘cult’, but would apparently beat up anyone who looked at him wrong. Adrien still remembered when one of the seniors had tried lording over him. Luka dropped his guitar case, punched the guy in the face and then walked off. He should have been terrifying. But like people started to believe the rumors following Adrien about him, he realised he had been the same for Luka. Luka was just a guy so in love with music and had trouble expressing himself without it, so he’d done it with his fists. But Anger Management had helped and now he actually had words and Adrien just couldn’t help but feel stable around him. 

Everything else in his life was going crazy. The rumors, the actual truth behind said rumors, Felix and issues with his mom and Adrien’s father, his loneliness because he couldn’t just talk to the people he’d been friends with for so long, the pressures of still doing modelling, everything. Luka made sense and even with his incredibly odd taste for music and odd sayings pulled from Anger Management classes, Adrien felt happy. Of course the crush that was growing might have also added things. He tried ignoring it, and maybe ignoring Luka, but the idea of losing him wasn’t something he wanted, so he accepted it. Whether or not he’d act on it was the question, but who knew.

The mansion was quiet. His parents were still out of town, Felix was no doubt still asleep and Nathalie never got up before coffee was made. He did find Gorilla in the kitchen doing just that though.

“Hey, I’m going out for breakfast. A friend is picking me up,” he told the towering silent man, who nodded after miming at him to have his phone.

He walked outside, already finding two motorcycles sitting outside the gate. Luka had his spare helmet waiting for him, his own visor pushed up.

“Question, how do you feel about bacon?”

“Bacon?”

“You know, pork product? Smells amazing? Best part of breakfast?”

“I mean, it’s not usually one of my list of things I can eat, but I guess I can deal.”

“Excellent, get on.”

Adrien had gotten very used to Luka’s very fast driving and before he knew it, they were pulling up to a large restaurant. Nathan was bouncing in place waiting for Adrien and Luka to get off the bike before he darted off to the front door. The restraint was modelled after an American diner and it was freezing inside.

“Oh, right. Sorry, I forgot to mention how cold they have it in here,” Luka said, pulling off his jacket, which Adrien tried to wave off. “Trust me. They keep it cold in here so you don’t stay all day.”

He took the jacket, taking in how warm it was. Luka’s scent wafted up, almost covering up the heavy smell of bacon inside the restaurant.

“Why does it smell like a meat store in here?” Adrien asked, sitting next to Luka.

“Well this place has always been the place we get breakfast from after the radio show. Ever since the first one. But they got a competitor not too long ago,” Nathan started to explain.

“With crap pancakes and service.” Luka interrupted.

“Yes. So to counteract it, they made every day double bacon day. Whatever you order, you get a double order of bacon.”

“Which he of course has to pay for.”

Nathan pouted. “You try asking for what I want.”

“I have.” Noticing Adrien’s confused face, he explained. “We’ve got a friend who makes D&D characters and she designs all of ours. Nathan here has a specific look he wants but he thinks it’s too embarrassing to ask for. I told him if he asked, I’d pay for breakfast forever. If he doesn’t, then he will. We’ve had two redesigns in the past year or so and he’s still chickened out.”

Nathan stuck his tongue out like a child. “Leave me alone.”

Adrien shook his head. This was his life now, with a music loving former rebel and an overactive redhead. This he would gladly deal with.

While the others ordered large platters, Adrien played it safe with a waffle and bacon, though Luka let him steal some of his eggs. Funnily enough, if Nathan tried, he’d get a slap on the back of the hand. He tried not to preen at the special attention.

Nathan had to head to work, so it was just the two of them as they drove back towards Agreste Mansion. It was still quiet in the streets and it seemed like there was no movement in the house.

“Thanks for breakfast.”

“No problem. If I had known playing pop songs would get your attention, I would have done it sooner.”

Adrien rolled his eyes. “No you wouldn’t.”

“Ok no cause I hate that music but still. You said you won’t be at school on Monday, right?”

“Yeah, it’s the only time an outfit fitting could be scheduled. So Tuesday then?”

“Tuesday. I’ll see you later.”

Adrien had already entered through the gates when he realised that he was still wearing Luka’s jacket. He turned to try and give it back, but Luka had already sped off. Adrien started to pull it off anyway as he made his way through the door when he felt something in the coat hit against his leg. Inside one of the pockets was Luka’s iPod. His pride and joy. Adrien couldn’t remember a time when Luka didn’t have it on him. 

That first day of school, when Adrien avoided the lunch room or any of the lunch benches out on the quad, he sat next to Luka against a wall. He had his earphones in, eyes focused on a book. Adrien still didn’t know him then. If he’d been told at that time that Luka Couffaine would become his rock, his best friend, his, well, crush, he would have thought that person was insane. But here he was.

Felix was leaving the dining room when he went inside, looking surprised to see Adrien.

“When did you leave?”

“Early this morning. I got breakfast with a friend.”

Felix raised an eyebrow. “Same one who delivered that pizza before?”

One of Luka’s jobs was as a delivery person for a local pizza place. When Adrien had tried listening to one of Luka’s many made CDs for him – so he could be educated on the right type of music – and fallen asleep, it led to Felix meeting Luka for the first time. Adrien hadn’t been looking for it but it sounded like Felix approved and that gave him a feeling of happiness.

“Maybe.”

Felix let out a hum before heading to the stairs. He was happy he didn’t say anything more. Adrien wasn’t sure what he’d say anyway.

He collapsed onto his bed, ready to fall asleep again. He couldn’t though, because of a certain item. Luka’s iPod. He was never seen without it. Luka said the silence made him itch, like everything was too much to handle. So the thing that helped him was never far out of reach. It turned on, still a half full battery available. There were many playlists, the names making no sense, but one caught his attention.

ADRIEN

He knew sneaking around on it wasn’t the best idea but…he couldn’t help himself. He pressed the center button and the list of songs that appeared where a mash of a lot of things. Things that looked very familiar. Because they were all the songs he and Luka ever talked about. Luka had a playlist of all the songs they talked about and it was a lot.

He wanted to know if the way he felt was the same. If he was making things up or wishing too hard. He wanted answers. It took all of his energy to not go running after Luka and asking. He fell asleep after several minutes of slowly scrolling through the list of songs Luka had under his name.

                                                 _______________

Adrien climbed out of the car, watching as Gorilla pulled out his phone. He meant to leave the house earlier. He distracted himself with homework before he went to ask Gorilla to take him to Luka’s house, when he was interrupted by a mighty crash from the kitchen. Felix was attempting to cook. Adrien stayed back to help and eat with him before he left.

He crossed the gangplank onto the deck of the house boat. The deck was empty, though there seemed to be music playing in the area above. He didn’t remember the whole look of it from the last time he was here, but he was sure that was a sitting area. He knocked on the door below the deck, which swung open. Rose, Luka’s sister’s girlfriend, let out a shriek when she saw who was standing on the other side.

“Adrien! What are you doing here?”

“Is that Adrien Agreste?” A girl with dreadlocks, some strands of different colours, looked at him in awe. There was another girl with red hair and glasses and another with a baseball cap and Juleka. They were all staring at him.

“Adrien is my friend! Oh, come in!” He was yanked inside where music seemed to be echoing on the walls and the living room was a mess. “We’re having a fashion show sleepover. You have to stay and help us with our looks.”

“Oh, well, you see.”

“Rose, are you ready yet? I have…” Luka walked in with a DSLR camera around his neck. “A show to plan? Adrien, what are you doing here?”

“He’s here to help us with our looks.” Rose said, pulling Adrien further into the house. He sent a pleading look to Luka who shrugged. He had a feeling that telling Rose ‘no’ was a hard thing. He was dragged to Juleka’s room, though Luka’s was separated with a curtain that was currently pushed back. Juleka’s taste in decorating was darker than her brother’s, but a lot of things seemed to be similar, such as the guitar and bass sitting in their stands and the posters of Jagged Stone. Some pictures didn’t really fit Juleka’s theme. Pictures of models, both male and female.

“Look, these are you.” Pictures from his father’s brand, from cologne ads, from sporting wear, even from that department store ad, with the tux for the dance, the perfect outfit and hair after fencing, the perfect outfit to study in the library. “I loved that ad so much and its story. You were so cool. You were like…”

“The guy who had everything.”

“Exactly!”

“Rose, come on. I have a show to plan. Are we going to do this or not?” Luka said, finally pulling her attention away.

“Alright, alright. Who has the order lists?” 

The girls started to leave the area, but not before the one in the baseball cap turned and quickly slapped the back of Luka’s butt, causing them all to burst into laughter as he let out a startled yelp. They quickly disappeared when he turned to glare at them. Adrien couldn’t help but stifle his laughter. It had been a high pitch squeak.

“Not a word out of you,” Luka ordered upon seeing him laugh.

“Course not. Here, I wanted to give this back to you,” he said, handing over the jacket.

“Oh, I could have waited until Tuesday to get this.”

“I know. I’m just sure you couldn’t wait for this.” He pulled out Luka’s iPod from one of the pockets, watching his face light up.

“Oh I would so miss this! Thank you.”

“I had a feeling you’d flip all of Paris to try and find it.”

“Very true. So what commercial was Rose talking about?”

Adrien pointed to the pictures from the different scenes of the ad. “It was from the department store for their back to school campaign. I’m the guy who has everything. Don’t feel like it though.”

“Doesn’t really look like you.”

Adrien looked over at him feeling a little insulted. “You don’t have to like it.”

“No, I mean, I’m looking at it and I see this picture-perfect person and think, ‘that’s not my Adrien’. It just doesn’t look like the real you.”

Before Adrien could ask him who the real Adrien was, Rose called from what sounded like above deck. Luka looked pained as he turned, heading towards the stairs.

“This is gonna end in tears. Just you watch.”

It took a while but it turned out Luka was right. Adrien had been in his corner of the sitting area on the deck above surrounded by mountains of makeup when one of the girls, Mylène, burst into tears.

“I don’t want to do this outfit anymore! I’m always in this one.” It was a beachy outfit; which Adrien guessed her dreads played a part in. Everyone else had changed a good number of times, but Mylène always seemed to be in different versions of the same outfit.

He quickly swooped in and took Mylène downstairs. She directed him to the clothes she brought over and it took a bit of prodding to find an outfit. He sent her off to the bathroom while he rooted through the pile of shoes to find a pair that would fit her. He looked up to see Luka leaning against the post that acted as the centre between his and Juleka’s rooms.

“You’re good at this,” he said, smiling down at Adrien.

“Modelling does lead to tears. Just find something to distract them and give them lots of chocolate after. Works every time.” Adrien finally found the shoes he wanted and stood up to see Luka pointing the camera at him. Covering his face with his hand, he said, “No. I don’t like having my picture taken.”

“But you’re one of Paris’ biggest models.”

“I know. Trust me, getting cameras shoved in your face is not as glamorous as it seems.”

“Oh, come on. Let me at least show you what I see.”

Remembering what Luka had said earlier about the ad pictures not looking like ‘his Adrien’, he brought his hand down and relaxed his body. He felt the smallest smile come to his face as Luka brought the camera back up and clicked the shutter. He walked over, leaning close to Luka as he brought the picture up. The lighting wasn’t the greatest and in the mess of helping Rose, his hair and clothes were a bit messy, but…he understood what Luka was saying.

“This is the real you,” Luka said, his words just brushing Adrien’s cheek, that’s how close they were. “This is my Adrien.”

My Adrien. It wasn’t weirdly possessive. It was comforting and with every insane thing that was happening in his life, to be picked by someone just for being himself, that made his heart happy. 

Maybe that’s why when he looked up and saw Luka staring at him, eyes moving down to his lips, he kissed him. He felt Luka kiss back. Adrien wanted to grab hold of him because the kiss made him feel weak in the knees, it felt that good, but unfortunately, that didn’t happen.

“How do I look?”

The two sprang apart, Luka hitting his head on the post. Mylène looked worried and a bit confused, but thankfully it looked like she hadn’t seen.

“Are you ok?” she asked.

“Luka! We’re ready for group shots!” Rose called from above deck.

“He’s all good. Here, put them on quickly,” Adrien said, handing her the shoes and pushing her towards the stairs. He could tell she was confused, but thankfully she didn’t ask.

They didn’t get a chance to be alone until the photoshoot was done and Luka had gotten the call that his mom would be home soon and the house was a mess. Luka walked Adrien to the gangplank, still waving off his offers to help clean up.

“Don’t worry about it. The girls will take care of most of it. Thanks again for bringing my iPod.”

“Of course.” Adrien hesitated, wanting to ask if the kiss was a fluke or if it was real when he realised Luka was moving closer to him, gently pulling his fidgeting fingers apart and linking them with his own.

“This ok?”

“Yeah. Perfect.”

Luka was leaning down and Adrien started to go up on his toes when they heard Rose. She came bounding over with pictures in her hand. The one that Luka took of him was on top.

“Here, so you can decorate your wall.”

When she finally went back below deck, Adrien gave Luka the picture he took of him. “That way you always remember what I look like. I might be coming to school in a few makeup looks next week.”

“Bet you’ll still look amazing as usual. I’m very tempted to test my luck a third time, but I can wait. Would you be ok if I came and picked you up on Tuesday?”

Adrien nodded, taking everything in him not to pull Luka in for a kiss, no matter who was watching.

“Awesome. I’ll see you then.”

Adrien had to bite down his smile when he eventually pulled himself away and got into the car. Kissing his rock should make him afraid of messing things up, but how could he when everything felt so right? And if Luka came to get him for school on Tuesday morning and Adrien noticed that his lanyard that had his student ID on it also had the picture of Adrien, well. How was he supposed to argue with that?

[laora-inn]

Supernatural - 15x17. The Empty and the Death

As all my SPN metas, it’s Destiel positive and happy end positive, don’t like - don’t read.

At first I’ve wanted to add this post here, to my specs about the last 7 eps repost. 

But 15x17 is just SO big. It deserves SEVERAL separate pieces. First of them will be dedicated to this: THE EMPTY IS NOT AN ENEMY. 

Why do I think so? ‘Cause it looks like Meg now, and Meg wasn’t an enemy. She surely was evil, especially for Sam in seasons 1-3 (and season 4 beginning), she supported Lucifer, but THIS Meg, Meg 2.0, which “pretty face” the Empty wore, was also extremely helpful to Cas and attached to him. In 13x04 we saw the Empty in Cas’s form, and then it took the form of his crash who in 8x17 DIED for him. Hmm. In 15x13 Ruby said that Cas and the Empty are clearly connected and he can change something in the Empty’s realm to make it better for all the dead angels and demons. Dumah in 14x08 was possessed by the Empty, but we also saw the Empty’s true form there - it’s black goo. The same Cas was dead because of in 7x02. The same he was dying because of in 12x12. 

That’s Jack who woke Cas in the Empty. But it’s Cas who woke the Empty, and I strongly doubt that the Death, or Chuck, or whoever else except Cas can return the Empty to the sleep. They are connected indeed: to know more you should read @winchestersingerautorepair​ posts about self-studies, growth and forms. 

The Empty is a part of Cas, symbolically though. He woke it and it’s progressing with him. 

Meg was Cas’s Amara (the Queen, as the Empty said of Meg in 15x17), his mirror in some sense, but the Empty isn’t Meg. That was Cas who made the Empty look like that! 

It could be Ruby in 15x13, for example, but no. Meg. Why the hell if there is no connection to Cas?! 

Surely, THERE IS a connection. The Empty is bigger, more literal and less independent Cas’s mirror than real Meg was. And once it is awake, it can’t go back to sleep until Cas lets it. 

Notice - the Empty does only the things Cas lets it. It’s listening to him - his sureness. His doubts. If he can stand for himself - it resurrects him. If he wants to give up his life and make a deal - it takes it. If he wants to talk with Ruby - it has nothing against it. If he feels like he is expendable - it tortures him. Why not? In 15x17 Cas said to Sam that he’ll not let him end his own life just to see Billie - but Cas ended his life couple episodes ago just to see dead Ruby! And he was SURPRISED when Dean called him an idiot for that! No wonder that in 15x13 the Empty treats Cas badly.    It’s like the part of his self!

Back to the black goo in 7x02 and 12x12 - it was CAS who killed himself. Not some external enemies, but the internal one. Always.

And if we’ll look to this “enemy” closer, it appears not to be an enemy at all!  My biggest enemy is me, as Lady Gaga sings. But my best friend is me as well.

What did the Empty do from its appearance? 1) Resurrected Cas.  2) Didn’t touch Jack’s soul even if he’s a half-angel and it has rights for him, so Jack could be returned to life - to Cas as well.  3) Made Cas think about his happiness. Said, that he could let himself to be happy. Not “he could be happy”, but “let himself to be happy”. Do you feel the difference?  Let yourself to be happy = understand, how happy you already are.  4) Let Billie keep Jack in its realm, away from Chuck, so Jack could be returned to life - to Cas as well.  5) Let Cas to talk with Ruby to get the Occultum.  And I’m asking you - what about all of it is wrong? What is bad? If it seems like nothing than it’s probably BECAUSE IT’S NOTHING. To Cas, to the Winchesters - the Empty hasn’t done nothing bad at all. Only good things. 

In 15x17 some more things about the Empty were revealed: 1) In 15x13 Cas made the Empty doubt in Billie’s fairness. I thought about it so hard - and here is my conclusion: when Cas’d known about Billie’s promise to the Empty, he was very suspicious. He even asked the Empty - that’s what she promised? (To return the Empty to sleep). She can do it?  I think she can’t. And after Cas’s questioning Billie the Empty began to question Billie’s intentions itself.  2) The result of that is Chuck’s Death Book in Winchesters’ hands. ‘Cause the Empty came to the Death library to talk about trust issues, but didn’t see Billie there. It saw Sam Winchester instead and gave the God’s book to him. Is it so easy to play the Empty? Naaah. I don’t think that’s just Sam’s luck.  3) The Empty is sure that God has power even in its realm and doesn’t like that. Controversial, but: if it’s not true, HOW THE HELL could Chuck resurrect Lilith? She’s a demon, and demons come to the Empty when die. So, God has power in the Empty - and that’s how he could resurrect Cas in 5x01 and 5x22, possibly in 7x02. IF IT WAS GOD!!! ‘Cause we know now - he’s lying.  We know for sure that Chuck didn’t resurrect Cas in 13x04. Jack woke Cas up. Cas made the Empty wake up - something that NEVER happened before. The Empty brought Cas back to the Earth. No God, no lies, just Jack’s power and some “friendly cosmic entity” (c). And now I think it can be really friendly.     4) The Empty said it can’t go to Earth unless summoned. 

And here is speculation time. 

I think Billie is not THE REAL DEATH. She isn’t the true and rightness one - like Chuck isn’t the true and rightness God. Billie is just a small fry, a reaper that took the place of something bigger, but didn’t understand its significance. In 11x02 Billie used the name of the Empty like a threat to Sam, but I don’t think she knew anything about the Empty as a “Shadow” or a “friendly cosmic entity”. Back then Billie was just a reaper with an order fixation - who might know about how to become the new Death though.  Billie showed as the Death only in 13x05. We saw the Empty at first time one episode before - in 13x04. Once again - I think there is no coincidence. 

I think the real Death is the Empty. The one that’s a part of you, like real God is the one who is the part of you (’cause God is in everything, like Adam said in 15x17). The one that can be your friend and bring you the peace, and understanding, and CHANGE - always for the best.  I think the Empty could be such Death for Cas - and this Death wouldn’t be an end, not in his case. It will be just a beginning. 

I suppose in 15x18 Billie’ll come for Dean, and Sam, and all the people they saved - but then, sooner or later, the Empty will be summoned. And it’ll help. Now I’m interested in what did Billie do from her first appearance. Was it good? Or not? I think - not. You? 

[laufire]

Supernatural s2

I’m halfway through s3 already (technically a rewatch, but there were episodes I didn’t watch the first time around), so this post is a little overdue lol. At this rhythim the posts will overlap. Plus I’m hoping I can finish s4-5 during the holidays to see the ~intended ending~ before I have to slow down on the binge-watch. After that, a season a month sounds achievable AND won’t take longer than 2021 xD

ANYWAY.

-Overall, I’ve enjoyed it more than the first one, but at the same time I’ve found myself missing how... claustrophobic? Insular? Compact? That one was. s2 was about the world opening up just a little bit more, introducing new characters to the brothers’ life, etc. I do love the detail that this is something that can only have, narratively speaking, once John is dead. Again: this show gets abusive families, consciously or not.

-The foreshadowing is beautifully done. 15 seasons make for a lot of unintentional and ironic foreshadowing later on, I’m sure, but the purposeful foreshadowing is superb this season. About the crossroads deals, of course, but especially about John’s last words. I already knew he’d told Dean he might have to kill Sam (father of the year, seriously. Though I side-eye the fandom even more for always having acted as if this is only awful for Dean lol), so I was hyperaware of every single detail. My favourite moment was the absolute horror of hearing Gordon proudly, cheerfully relate how he murdered his sister when she became a vampire (which, btw, as someone that’s still bitter about what went down with the Gunn siblings on Angel, I found it healing to see something like that treated as a horror story).

-Speaking of Gordon: I unashamedly love his character lmfao. Sterling K. Brown is mesmerizing, always. At the same time, I have serious mixed feelings (especially after seeing his arc in full in s3) because man, if it isn’t a racist mess. I’ve mentioned this before, but it’s not exactly revolutionary that the first time we see the story from the monster’s POV (something I want the show to do! Often!), it’s when white monsters are stalked and brutalized by our first black hunter. Especifically a white woman, btw (although I’m happy to see Tara Maclay as a brunette vampire. I didn’t know I needed that in my life, but I did). And you can tell that the show thinks it’s just so SMART and FUNNY to have a ~racist black hunter!! I mean, the comment about how psychic kids would be “betraying their race” if they allied with demons?? FFS.

And ofc there’s the fact that he’s condemned for the exact same type of stuff that makes Dean be hailed as a hero lmfao. Though I won’t like, I love the moment where, faced with the comparison, Dean’s response is “I might be like you, I might not. But you’re the one tied up.” I love those kinds of character moments. As of s2 I officially have a love-hate relationship with Dean Winchester, I hate it here xDD

But still, on his own, Gordon is an amazing character (it’s one of the most frustrating things about the show, the greatness tainted by the bigotry :))). Charismatic, terrifying, and ofc superbly acted. Also, I love that the fact that he praised John (as opposed to every other hunter having a rockier relationship with him) is clearly supposed to be a red flag LMFAO.

-I enjoy how the seasons delves more deeply into Sam’s ~~dark origins, since it was my fave thing about him way back when. I’m already mourning the (as I suspect) lost of his powers, ngl. There’s a little more attention in how he tends to over-identify with supernatural creatures struggling with their ~dark sides too (bitch me too, the fuck xD), which I LOVE to see (among other reasons because at least in that way we get a little of their POV in the forefront lol). One of my favourites in that sense was the episode centered around the ghost-who-didn’t-know-she-was-ghost, played by Tricia Helfer. I clocked early one what was going on, but it was still very enjoyable, especially with Sam’s empathy with her (contrasted by Dean being a total bitch about it, btw. I can’t believe I still see post about how Dean is all heart/kindness/compassion/whatever the fuck. Dean is all about selective empathy and only when it conveniences him, pls).

I was more divided on the episode with Madison the werewolf, tbh. OTOH it put Sam in a better position, for a change xD. As the one willing to make The Hard Choices by fulfilling his promise to kill her because she was dangerous, even when Dean offered to ~take the burden from him. OTOH I hate that kind of thing lol. YOU GUYS KNOW A HUNTER PRO LIKE BOBBY, I BET HE COULD’VE FIGURED OUT SOMETHING TO CONTAIN HER A FEW NIGHTS A MONTH. Also, my immediate reaction was to compare this to when my man Angel had a crush on a werelady and helped her every month lmfao. But then, very few characters can withstand a comparison with Angel, in any sense :P

I also liked Sam’s subplot with his fellow demon-psychic kids, though I wish it’d lasted longer :/ (also: RME at the queer girl dying almost immediately AND her power being killing people, her girlfriend first of all, with her touch. The black guy was the last one to die at least...?). My fave was Ava, by far. I loved her since her reaction to helping Sam stealing a psychiatrist’s records was yelling “I’M AWESOME!!”. It made it easy to buy that someone that appeared so mundane, with her easy life and her fiance and whatnot, would become so power hungry and go off the rails, IMO.

BTW: RME at Dean being all “oh Sam is going too dark/becoming to cold” when Sam kills Jake. Jake ripped off his spine and killed him first!! It both amuses me and infuriates me all the times Dean tries to push Sam to be more like himself and then freaks out whenever Sam is not all sunshine and rainbows (while still remaining, IMO, far less cold than Dean himself. Besides, it’s not easy to be colder than Dean, lol).

Lastly, a little character detail I loved was when Sam was jealous about Dean being in the federal database but not himself lmfao. 

-I loved the new foreshadowing crumb with Sam finding out Mary knew the demon, too (information he’ll withhold from Dean, which I approve of LOL). I mean, I know exactly what’s up, I’ve watched most of s4 xD (also, what is UP with this family and making deals with demons. Everyone but Sam so far!! And then HE gets dragged for ~getting too close to one smh. Maybe lead by example!! Also also: yes, it was meant to be ambiguous, but I can’t help but notice the only kiss-pact -or further, depending to how close YED was to Lilith’s levels, since to make a deal with her you have to fuck xD- we didn’t see was the one that must’ve happened between John and YED. Cowards!! xD). Still. I’m so curious about her. Her resurrection is one of the main reasons I’m determined to make it to the later seasons, ngl.

-Another thing I LOVED about this season is how they used sibling relationships to parallel/foreshadow stuff about the brothers, the way s1 did often with fathers. I’ve already mentioned Gordon and his sister, but the others are not less brutal imo: Andy having to kill his evil twin, who wanted him all for himself (... Dean is that you xD); the little girl’s ghost who wanted her grand-niece to commit suicide to stay with her, and didn’t give in until her old sister agreed to die in her place. It was chilling. Also, at one point the parallel was between the brothers and a married couple (the ghost-who-didn’t-know-she-was-a-ghost) and asñdlfkajsf. I’m guessing they had fun with the shippers lol.

Speaking of the brothers’ relationship, this season also goes a little further in escalating the violence between them, when Dean punches Sam in the face and he refuses to respond (“you can hit me all you want, it won’t change anything”. Fuck), or when Dean again punches Sam after Sam was possessed by Meg ¬¬

-Going back to my love-hate relationship with Dean, lmfao. My biggest beef remains how much validation his POV gets from the narrative, granted or not; he’s one of the most irritating cases of protagonist-centered morality and I know it’s only going to get worse smh. At least this season it feels a little more balanced than in s1, with episodes like the one where the civilian Sam had tried to keep away dies halfway through the ep because Dean allowed him to get involved, for example. Still, it grates on me xD. The continuing prison rape jokes/demonic possession rape jokes (with Meg and Sam), his general grossness with women and his lack of sympathy for non-humans even when they’re not trying to hurt anyone don’t exactly help. Also, I often see him praised for some of his political views, a lot of which I agree with (his mistrust of cops, saying convicts don’t deserve to die no matter what they do), but when contrasted with his general attitude across the show it’s really grating ngl.

But then he has such AMAZING character details thrown in, that make me appreciate him as a POV character nonetheless, as much as I often want to curb stomp the guy xD. I loved his speech about how there’s no such thing as a dignified death. I love how he refused to come near his mother’s grave, both at the beginning and at the end of the episode (this show is like, the cure to DCCW’s shows false fuzzy sentimentality istg). I love his pop-culture references, like when Sam mentions Dean always thought OJ was the murderer or Dean jokes about freeing Katie Holmes from Scientology’s cult xD (sometimes it really hits you how old this show is lol). I enjoyed his Wishverse episode, and his lines after Sam dies/he sells his soul to save him (“I had one job”, “my life can mean something”) hit HARD.

But most of all? I LOVE how and why he starts losing respect for John. It’s so fucking cold and abrupt and makes so much sense!! Like, yes, part of it is John’s message about killing Sam (... again, father of the year!), but most of all it’s about John making a pact with a demon and dying TO SAVE DEAN (and probably, simply that he died at all. That shit de-mystifies anyone). IT’S SO FUCKING GREAT TO WATCH. “He spent his life chasing that demon. He was supposed to die fighting, not making a deal with the damn thing. That was supposed to be his legacy, not this." Damn, Dean xDD. The *contempt* with which he said that killed me.

I also love his inherently atheist vision of the world (even if yes, it’s extremely funny knowing this show has canon God and angels and shit -no Jesus Christ though, which I find endlessly funny-, or that they actually meet the archangel Gabriel in disguise xD. Either way, the episode with the fake angel and its foreshadowing was hilarious), his anti-destiny stance, and that it’s him and not John who gets to kill YED.

-I liked Ellen and Jo. Not LOVED, but I liked them. I keep fearing that secondary (especially female) characters will feel empty/shallow but the show keeps proving me wrong, even with one-episode wonders, and at first I wasn’t sure about them, but I was sold quickly. Partially because of the actresses, they both had this... humanizing, endearing quality? It worked really well.  I also loved the explicit contrast between John and Ellen’s parenting styles, with Ellen wanting Jo to return to school and be safe from the hunt, and Jo wanting something different. Also, I wouldn’t ship it if you paid me, but LOL at anyone who actually buys Dean sees Jo as a ~little sister just because MEG said that rme.

This show is just REALLY good when it comes to giving depth to a character with only a couple of brush strokes, which makes it all the more frustrating when they abruptly die or disappear to never be seen again/only once more (to abruptly die!) :)))

I was less sold on Ash; he was amusing, but having a Genius Hacker TM helping them out seemed like the beginning of increasingly giving the brothers ways of deux ex machina-ing them out of problems, when one of my favourite things about the show is seeing them creatively find ways out themselves. I like when they’re competent! Like with the multitude of codes they have to improvise plans, like in the episode where with two words through a lawyer they implemented a quick scheme so that Sam would escape from a police precinct. I like that stuff.

-I’m still so bitterly jealous about the dead man’s blood hurting vampires detail. SO BITTERLY JEALOUS. I love a lot of what this show does with its lore but that little bit is the worst offender. I want it so bad xD

[thedeviltohisangel]

I Know It’s Too Late//1

There was something good about being with Jay. About being with Jay again. It was different than the good that was falling in love with him in the desert. That had been necessary for survival. It hadn’t been soft or romantic but raw. Like it was the most fundamental pieces of them that were coming together.

masterlist is my url/writing

let me know if you wish to see more of these two

There was something good about being with Jay. About being with Jay again. It was different than the good that was falling in love with him in the desert. That had been necessary for survival. It hadn’t been soft or romantic but raw. Like it was the most fundamental pieces of them that were coming together. 

She thinks that was why it didn’t work once they had returned home. There was less adrenaline and more time to be alone with their thoughts. It was hard enough as individuals to find a place back in society but as a pair it proved impossible. The shared experiences that had brought them together were ultimately what drove them apart.

Meg had heard that Chicago could be compared to a warzone. But she didn’t think she would ever be in the middle of it. She had taken the paramedic job as a way to escape. As a way to chase those happiest moments that she had had overseas. It was like an addict chasing their high. But she didn’t expect hers to come this close to killing her.

She and her partner had been called to an apartment where the person on the line suspected an overdose. Her neighbor was unconscious on the floor when she opened the door to leave and go grocery shopping. It was after Meg used the first dose of NARCAN that the shot rang out and the bullet whizzed above her head.

“Shit!” she cursed as she took a second to understand her surroundings. There was an open door a few feet away and that was the only semblance of cover she could see. “On my count, stay low and help me drag him over there.” Another shot rang out but Meg didn’t see the bullet this time. She counted to three before her partner lifted the patients feet while she dragged his torso towards the open apartment door.

“PD is on their way. Not sure how we get this guy out before the guy with the gun gets out,” her partner huffed. Meg peered out into the hallway but it was empty. The person pulling the trigger was behind one of the apartment doors. 

“Well he should be waking up soon-” True to word, the man lying on the floor began to stir. “Sir, we are with the Chicago Fire Department. You overdosed on opioids and we administered NARCAN but recommend you go to the hospital for further treatment.” Meg had seen someone going through withdrawal before. It wasn’t a pretty sight.

“I don’t need no fucking hosptal.” She moved backwards slightly as he began to appear agitated. There was then the sound of footsteps in the hallway then a door crashing down. “You called the police?” Before she could even answer, he was now pointing a gun at her.

“One of your neighbors took a shot at us. We didn’t think we had a choice if we wanted to get you out,” she said with her hands up.

“The police aren’t here for you, man. No need for that.” It was then that Meg heard the absolute last voice that she was expecting to.

“Chicago PD. Put the gun down and lets talk, Aidan.” Jay Halstead. She wanted to turn around and make sure her ears weren’t betraying her but she was scared to. What would she do if it was him? That almost seemed like the harder task than getting the gun out of her face.

“I’m not talking. How about I shoot her instead?” To be fair, it was not the first time she had a gun pressed to her skin. But it was the first time since she had become a mother. So it felt a little bit different than it had last time. She could feel the air stiffen around her as everyone in the room adjusted to the change in circumstance.

“Safety’s on,” Meg muttered as she took a second to focus. It wasn’t a bluff or attempt to distract him. He had actually left his safety on. 

“What-” He pulled the gun from her in order to see if she was telling the truth, a look of confusion on his face, which she used as her opportunity to give him a piece of her mind. She swung her legs into his knees, which buckled, causing the gun to drop from his hand into her waiting one. When she turned to hand it to the cop behind her, she had forgotten her suspicion as to who it was.

“Meg?” 

“Jay.” It came out in a breath. Saying his name was as natural as breathing. It settled in her chest like it was meant to and warmed her from the inside out.

“What are you doing here?” He relaxed his stance as other cops swarmed into the room and put handcuffs around the man on the floor and her partner got taken outside to be looked at for injuries.

“Well, I got called here,” she said while motioning to her uniform like it was the most obvious thing in the world. He rolled his eyes.

“Sure. But why Chicago? Why now?”

“Why now? Is it a bad time?” He made it sound like something was going on in his life that her being here would complicate. Like she was doing this all on purpose.

“Just wasn’t expecting to see you again is all,” he said quietly as he offered his hand for the gun she was still holding.

“Yeah. Me neither.” She held his gaze as long as she could before someone called his name out in the hallway.

“Wait here. I’ll walk you down to get checked out.” Jay couldn’t stop himself. His hand moved without his knowledge and tucked some hair behind her ear before he pulled back like he had been burned. And it had felt like fire against her skin as well. White hot intensity that still lingered even after his hand was gone.

“I’m happy I was wrong,” she whispered in reference to their statements that they didn’t think they would see each other again.

“That’s a first,” he replied with a smirk. His conversation with Voight was quick, the sargeant noticing his detective’s eye drifting to the new paramedic in the other room more often than it was focusing on him.

“There something I need to be looped in on?” Jay was one of his best, a leader of the Intelligence Unit. If his mind was going to be elsewhere, Hank needed to know.

“We served together. Haven’t seen her in awhile is all.” Hank knew that wasn’t all, Jay knew that wasn’t all. But it was easier than trying to explain the history between the two. His relationship with Meg was tucked away with the rest of his stories and feelings from his time with the Rangers. Maybe one day.

They walked slowly and silently out of the apartment building and to the back of an ambulance so Meg could get her clean bill of health before returning back to her station. “That was smart what you did back there. With the safety being on,” Jay said as she took a seat on the bumper and he leaned next to her.

“Thanks. It all just comes back to me sometimes, you know? Like I never left and am still in it.” Jay nodded because he knew. And it was nice to hear someone say it out loud so he didn’t have to. Nice to know someone knew what he was going through without words. Nice to just be with Meg again. “You’re giving me that look, stop it,” she said as the paramedic took her vitals.

“The one where I ask if you want to get dinner with me tomorrow night?” he replied with a smirk.

“Good one. But I need at least a couple of days to get a babysitter.” That furrowed his brow.

“Babysitter?”

“Yeah. A lot has changed since the last time I saw you. Becoming a mother is the biggest one but also the best one.” 

“You’re a mom, wow,” Jay said with a smile. “I bet you’re the fucking best one ever too.” There had been a time when he thought he would be the one to make her a mother.

“I try. Her dad is a piece of shit so I just need a bit more leeway on dinner but I’ll make it happen.”

“Okay. You let me know when you’re ready.” Something stirred at the idea that the father of her child was less than perfect but it wasn’t his place. He had a lot of questions but asking them wasn’t his place. Jay couldn’t just jump right back in and pretend everything was normal and always had been. There was a reason they weren’t together anymore.

“I will, Detective. Be safe until I see you again.” Meg was genuine with her words. 

“You do the same.” Last time Jay had watched her walk away from him, his heart shattered into a million pieces. This time, it felt like everything was coming back together. 

[the-trashy-phoenix]

Supernatural season 7 review (part 1)

Link to part 2:

I think this season was a lot alike the first ones, maybe because of the amount of episodes representing small hunts that have nothing to do with the big plot (as episode 4, about the Egyptian god Osiris, 5, about witches, 7, about ghosts, 12, about the Greek god Cronus, 13, about the Amazons, 14, about Sam’s fear of creepy clowns, 15, about demons and so on), or also because the plot of the season, the Winchesters fighting against the villain of the season, was quite simple. I somehow appreciate the two features, and I will later explain why, but of course at this point of the show it’s kind of unnatural not to focus on bigger storylines.

I find the “single episodes” pretty original, but I can’t help thinking they’re only meant to increase the number of episodes and create at least 20 of them per season, and that the main storyline alone would’ve requested only at most half of them to get completed. I’d understand if the show wasn’t 15 seasons long, and if the authors didn’t force all the main action to take place in the very last episodes.

Season 7 has a quite plain main plot: the villain, Dick Roman (Latins would’ve said “nomen omen”, which means something like “someone’s name’s an omen”), the leader of Leviathans, plans to conquer the world by drugging and killing people through the food produced in his factories. It is clear that Sam and Dean have to stop him. As I was saying, for someone who’s used to complex plots, this season might result a bit boring, but for me it was even relaxing not having to keep too many details in mind.

Two of the main themes of the season are introduced already in the first episode, Leviathans, which are contained in Castiel’s body and are destined to come out and spread death, and Sam’s hallucinations, which will accompany him for a long time.

I just mentioned Leviathans, new creatures that appear right from Purgatory thanks to Castiel. We’ve left him at the end of season 6 and we meet him again as an arrogant and vengeful God. I found it quite strange that Castiel had become so mean, and even the Winchesters can’t understand his behaviour. It is kind of a lesson of how power can change people, but still at some point I found it incoherent with Cas’ personality, as he has always been so humble and kind to every human, especially to Sam and Dean, and as he suddenly asks for their forgiveness.

When Leviathans take over, Cas dies. It is a very painful moment, as every time someone dies through Supernatural, but it is as if the brothers are sorrowfully getting used to losing people and have so many problems to solve at the same time they don’t have any more mental energy to devote to process grief. They always carry an unbearable burden they never have time to mindfully focus on and that makes them so frustrated they’re often almost to the point of exploding.

This time Cas’ death is the least of their problems, as Leviathans are starting to kill and eat people at a hospital, and in addition they are invincible with the Winchesters’ usual weapons, and Lucifer is trying to take over Sam’s mind. We immediately get to know that Sam’s mental wall is broken, so that Lucifer can torment and play him. It is like Sammy can’t have rest from his demonic side and can’t get rid of it: Lucifer provides him with increasing hallucinations and pain. Dean and Bobby are really worried about him, but they have no clue on how to cure Sam, as it happens most of the time when one of the brothers is “supernaturally ill”.

However, despite all the odds they’ve been and are going through, Sam and Dean finally seem to be happy and comfortable with each other, but their dynamics get complicated in the third episode, when Dean kills Amy, a monster who’s Sam’s friend and has proven trustworthy, of course without telling his brother. The brothers’ relationship is a seesaw of continuous positive and negative moments, and when one of them does something like this I really doubt they’ve been able to build a solid bond based on trust. That is their biggest problem which keeps on coming out without ever being resolved: the typical pattern is that one of them does something he doesn’t want the other to know and the lie goes on until the truth is invariably revealed leading to endless fights (until one of them is severely ill or dead). Sam, Dean, don’t you see that’s how things always go? Wouldn’t it be easier and better and healthier for your relationship to always tell the truth, even if it hurts, because hiding it and knowing it later is by far more painful and problematic? I wonder if they’ll ever understand that, considering that, as they’re approximately the two of them alone against the entire world, it is stupid to keep on lying to each other.

Meanwhile, Bobby studies a Leviathan to find a way to kill him and Sam and Dean meet Frank, a weird old friend of Bobby’s who helps them create new identities, because two Leviathans in the shape of Sam and Dean are committing crimes all over the country. Finally Bobby and the brothers find out that the monsters aren’t as invincible as they seemed to be at first, because they can be slowed down by cutting their head or by burning them with some chemicals.

The mid-turning point of the season is episode 9: the three find out about Dick Roman and his plans, which they try to stop by entering into one of his food factories, where Bobby is captured. I wasn’t worried at all about that, because the Winchesters and Bobby always go through difficult situations, and that one wasn’t surely worse than other times. That’s why Bobby’s death occurred so unexpectedly and hurt a lot more than all the others in Supernatural. An entire episode, the tenth, is devoted to the exploration of Bobby’s mind in his last moments of life, where he’s accompanied by Rufus through his happiest memories. We have an extraordinary view of Bobby’s existence, with his parents and his wife, and of course the brothers. Even in this highly pathetic moment we experience Bobby’s deep bond with his adopted children: he spends his last breath and forces to communicate a fundamental information he’s discovered to defeat Dick. This was really the solemn ending moment, as if the ultimate meaning of Bobby’s life was giving everything, his knowledge, his love and his life, to Sam and Dean, having been loyal to them since forever. As you may see, Bobby’s death really broke my heart: I thought of him as a nearly immortal character, who would have been by the brothers’ side until the end. As it was predictable, this event has massive consequences to the plot and particularly to the Winchesters (by the way, it is extremely meaningful that they seem to be much more scattered than when John died). They face their grief the only way they know, working cases and gathering information on Dick to avenge Bobby. Unfortunately, they lose another precious ally on their way: as a matter of fact Frank gets killed by Leviathans, which was sad both because he had helped a lot Dean in tracking Dick and because he was quite fun and a nice presence in the season.

As if all that trouble wasn’t enough, Sam’s visions of Lucifer become more and more frequent and painful, while Dean can’t find a way to help him. The brothers have to face everything at the same time: the fight against Dick, Bobby’s death and Sam’s mental instability, which is destroying him and Dean at the same time, as what happens to one of them affects even more painfully the other. In addition, another worry comes out: Dean finds out Castiel is alive and has lost all his memories about who he is and what he has done. Dean at first can’t really forgive him, but when Cas gets to have his memories back, he can’t resist his stubborn hate toward his “friend” and finally decides to erase God-Cas parenthesis, also because the angel is so guilty he offers himself to take over Sam’s hallucinations. It is a noble sacrifice which allows the brothers to go back to hunting Dick and establish a new degree of friendship and trust between team free will, after the painful moment of Cas’ death. I think both getting rid of Lucifer and gaining back Castiel give the brothers the hope they need to succeed in defeating Dick, after the previous single episodes of impasse.

In the ending episodes another surprise awaits Sam and Dean: Bobby, as a ghost, manages to communicate with them and makes himself visible, giving start to a weird dynamic where he still helps the brothers as he did when he was alive, but using his ghost powers. This situation leaves in the protagonists and in the viewer a sense of bitter illusion, as everyone knows it can’t end well, as Bobby’s destined to become a vengeful spirit, like any other ghost, and when the moment comes they would have to kill him again, and, doing so, renewing their pain. This kind of “second death” was quite sadistic, but still I appreciated Bobby’s comeback as it was right to give more space to such an important character and explore the afterlife from a different point of view. From the first time we profoundly feel ghosts’ frustration of being isolated from living people and we can easily put ourselves in their shoes, as they’re no more depicted merely as a cruel monster.

I think this process could be included in the new connotation of supernatural creatures that emerges from these seasons on: the absolute dichotomy good-evil which imposes that monsters can only be bad is a bit more flexible (and along with it, also the Winchesters become more and more open minded) and gives space to complex characters and personalities which can’t be defined univocally. The best example of this change of tone is Meg. I really appreciated the growth of the character from season 1, where she seems to be an ordinary demon, to seasons 6 and 7, where she’s developed as a proper round character, an outsider from both demonic and human worlds: here she keeps helping the Winchesters, presenting herself as a good ally against Dick and Crowley and at same time preserving her typical bad bitch attitude. She leaves us a striking message, volunteering to look after Castiel at the hospital while the boys are busy fighting Dick: the strict first seasons determinism is definitely gone, also demons can make decisions using their free will and change the order of things, fighting side to side with the good guys. This kind of sympathy for the brothers can be noticed also in Crowley at some point, as he helps them with the spell to defeat Leviathans, but of course there’s no doubt his only interest is to use Sam and Dean to fight a common enemy.

Moreover, season 7, marked by many painful deaths, is certainly also productive of new characters destined to become permanent for some time. Besides two appearances of Jody, one of the rare positive and strong female figures of the show, who is now occasionally helping the brothers in their hunts, and one of Becky, which gives us one of the funniest episodes of the season, where she makes Sam falling in love with her thanks to a potion and marries him, three new important characters are presented.

First of all Garth, a weird and clumsy hunter, helps Dean in episode 8 (while Sam is married to Becky): after the initial skepticism, he becomes one of their most trusted friends. I find the relationship between Garth and the boys so cute, as they kind of protect him by teaching him what they know about monsters and in return he tries very hard to be accepted in their team and to do whatever he can to help them.

At the end of the season we meet another young male character, Kevin, a normal kid who studies and has dreams about his career, but gets absorbed by the supernatural world as he is chosen as a prophet of the Lord. His skill is to be able to read some tablets containing the Word of God and fundamental knowledge about angels, demons and other creatures (thanks to one of those tablets Sam and Dean get to know how to kill Leviathans). Kevin is such a lovely guy, at first really confused, as every human would be in his situation, and as well hopeful that the nightmare he finds himself into without having a choice would end quickly. We know, as well as the Winchesters, that things like this never end and once you’re trapped in the supernatural world it is forever, and that’s why we feel pitiful and protective towards Kevin. Seen from Sam and Dean’s perspective, he’s another innocent person they have to look after and feel guilty for even if nothing about it is their fault. Kevin is one of those characters that make one doubt about the real existence of free will and self determination, especially for someone who’s devoted to high purposes in the economy of the show.

Last but not least, the end of season 7 sees the appearance of one of the undoubtedly best characters in Supernatural, Charlie. She becomes a fundamental part of the plan of defeating Dick thanks to her great computer skills, but, more importantly, she quickly becomes Sam and Dean’s friend and one of their best allies in some of their hunts. I really loved her as a character and in her interactions with the brothers, as from the very beginning they seem to see her as their little sister. She also brings into the show a small (but still great and quite unexpected) insight on the lgbt community, being overtly lesbian. I loved how Dean in particular was at ease knowing this information, and the fact that the authors seem to get more in step with the times, as the ideas of slight misogyny and toxic masculinity and heterosexuality of the first seasons can’t fit anymore in recent years. It is so interesting to see how the show grows in time through its characters and their complex psychology and personality, even if there’s still a long road ahead in terms of equality and representation.

I have the feeling that this season goes through three changes in mood, the first half (and a bit more) being quite problematic and full of sad events and the last part presenting some positive characters who guarantee hope for the finale. The last episode is a mixture of the two sides, as Dick is happily defeated, but his death has a price: Dean and Cas are sent directly to Purgatory with Leviathans. So the episode ends with our favourite couple having to deal with the third mysterious realm of afterlife (we’ve already been to both Heaven and Hell) and its dangerous monsters.

- Irene 💕

[operaghostnocturne]

The Problem with ‘Love Never Dies.’

“Love Never Dies,” 2012 Starring Ben Lewis as The Phantom, Anna O'Byrne as Christine, watched on Youtube, 4/24/2020 SPOILERS.  I would like to note: I enjoyed the set design, costume design, some of the music, and production of this version of Love Never Dies.  I also really liked the actor’s performances.  They did a good job.  I especially loved Ben Lewis’s singing voice.  (Derrick Davis ((US Restaged Tour)) is still my favorite.) The problem with Love Never Dies is its a sequel to Phantom of the Opera, the characterization, and writing. ALW’s Phantom of the Opera stands alone. It was never meant to have a sequel.  It really doesn’t need one.  I do feel there is a big disconnect between POTO and LND. I think LND could be rewritten to have nothing to do with the original POTO and would not suffer for it. To me, LND feels like someone’s fixit fanfic that doesn’t actually fix anything.  POTO is also insanely iconic.  It is hard to follow it up. While LND’s music is pretty good, I don’t think its nearly as memorable nor iconic as POTO’s.  I also don’t feel it balanced original POTO music with new material.  Honestly, it needs to pick one. Something ALW does in his musicals is reuses the notes of a song, mixed in a different pattern to make a new one.  “The Music of the Night” and “All I Ask of You” are like this (look at sheet music if you don’t believe me.)  This is not a complaint.  This helps with cohesion of a musical.  It also makes refrains, duets with battling music, and sometimes even story, clearer. When its done well, its unnoticeable. In fact, I got to play a POTO compilation in a semi-professional concert orchestra in high school.  I never noticed ALW does this until when someone pointed it out to me like a month ago.  In LND, I can constantly hear the rifts from the first musical, to the point where I think one of those songs is about to start, or it gets super distracting.  I noticed this especially in ‘Why Does She Love Me?’  I’m 80% sure it was based of POTO’s main theme (like the song ‘Phantom of the Opera,’ or the ‘Overture.’)  Again, I liked most of the music in LND.  But it doesn’t hold a candle to POTO. oh look I made a pun. Having said that all that: LND feels like a sequel mostly to 2004.  In my opinion, 2004 has the most sympathetic version of the Phantom, and the one that could most likely end up with Christine in the end.  Especially compared to the US Restaged Tour.  In 04, I also feel like the Phantom and Christine (not their actors) feel closer in age than other productions of the musical, other Phantom adaptations, and even the book.  (For those who don’t know: Erik is 50-60 in the book, Christine is like, 16.) LND’s writing is not great.  First of all: THE PHANTOM’S NAME IS ERIK. I know they were trying to have a MYSTERY pun. Mister Y does not work for that, especially in a format that ISN’T BEING. READ.  I can understand why its left out in POTO, as it lends the Phantom some mystery (though I do not like it.) There is LITERALLY no reason not to have the Phantom called Erik it LND. Granted, this is a complaint I have from POTO too.  I kinda feel like the Phantom not having a name dehumanizes him. That is a discussion for another day. I absolutely HATE that the Phantom runs a circus company.  A big part of Erik’s trauma comes from being in a freak show.  I don’t believe Erik would be willing to go back to that.  I also don’t think it would be his scene.  The Phantom of the Opera belongs in an Opera house, or at the very least a music all. I don’t know why he couldn’t have started something like that instead of a freak show.  Or perhaps be an eccentric composer. Especially if he is getting help from the Giry’s.   I do think its fitting that he’s working with/employing disabled, or deformed people, and other societal outcasts.  However, being the owner of the VERY THING that treated him horribly is pretty bad, especially since we don’t know if he treats these people any better than he was treated. Also, every time the music switched to ‘show tunes,’ I felt Erik’s soul dying.  On that note, when LND shifts from a musical to addressing the audience directly in its ‘show tunes’ sections, its jarring.  It breaks the fourth wall way too much and really pulls the audience out of whats going on.  The way Erik is in POTO, chased away from the world and the light, is why he is like he is.  He became fascinated with the night, the macabre and darkness because of his experiences with the world. That’s a pretty big point in POTO.  Its one of the things that make him sympathetic. After all “THE WORLD SHOWED NO COMPASSION TO ME!” is the Phantom’s excuse in the final lair. LND tramples over that.  Gustave seems to be interested in the same darkness his biological father is, as seen in “The Beauty Beneath.”  Erik’s obsession with the dark, night, and macabre is turned into genetics.  Which is pretty bad for Gustave if you think too hard about it. Erik is a serial killer.  I do believe talent can be passed in genetics.  I also think the way we view said talent and how we use it is shaped by personal experiences and preferences.  On that note, Gustave could have gotten his musical abilities from his mother, or his grandfather, both of whom are also talented musicians.   Another thing LND suffers from, is making Christine a prize again. Raoul and Erik do not see her as a person.  ‘Devil Take the Hindmost’ is literally the boys having a dick measuring contest, with Christine as the prize.  That is not okay. I hated the ending. For several reasons.  First of all, the Phantom is still abusive.  He is a puppet master. He is still not capable of having a healthy relationship with Christine.   Secondly, Christine dies. ALW, if you are gonna write a fixit fic the LEAST you could do is let Erik be happy.  Plus, Christine is killed by a cliche ‘I just wanted you to notice me’ subplot. One that wasn’t entirely well set up or thought out.  Which is disappointing and frustrating.  Last two things I hated: when Christine kisses Erik for the last time, she doesn’t take off his mask.  I feel like they missed a good opportunity to show Christine being completely accepting of who Erik is, including what he looks like (again, would be better if Erik wasn’t abusive.)  I also NEVER like it when we don’t get to see Erik’s deformity in any version of Phantom.  The only other one that doesn’t I’ve seen/read is Dance. (Which I dislike greatly. Its at the bottom of my list.)  I’m kinda good either way if Gustave goes with Erik or Raoul (preferably neither, if I get a choice, which I don’t.)  Erik and Gustave can connect over music in a way Raoul and Gustave cannot. Erik can teach Gustave about music and the beauty beneath. Raoul did raise Gustave.  Raoul might also have a serious heart change after the events of LND that we are not shown.  Or we can do that one AU where Raoul and Erik become Gustave’s two dad’s (either gay or not, whatever floats your boat.)

The worst thing about LND is it completely ignores the character growth in its predecessor. Characters completely regress into who they were before the ending of POTO.  This is annoying and bad writing. Lets start with Meg and Madame Giry.  I don’t like that Madame Giry is helping Erik. Yes, she helped him escape the freak show in 2004 (and possibly other versions.) BUT, she was also absolutely TERRIFIED of the Phantom in POTO.  She helped Raoul find the Phantom’s Lair, with the full knowledge that Raoul intended to put a stop to Erik’s madness.  I think it would be more likely that Madame Giry would stay as far away as Erik as she possibly could. Madame Giry also feels like a secondary greedy villain in LND, and that feels WAY off base for her. Maybe Erik being manipulative has rubbed off on her? Again, I don’t think she would be in this position in the first place (nor would Erik be manipulative, because I see him as realizing he DUN HECKED UP at the end of POTO). Meg, I could see wanting to help the Phantom (she even does in some versions.)  I see this as her being enthralled by the legend of the Phantom, and less that they actually know each other. As for her loss of innocence, I don’t think it was set up well, nor was it executed well. Also, Meg wanting the Phantom to see her is a cliche. Cliches can be okay, if they are handled well. I don’t think LND wrote it well. The only person I feel that has consistent characterization from POTO is Raoul (well, a specific version of it.)  I have always been of the opinion that Raoul is a jerk.  Having him spiral into gambling and drinking after a traumatic event is not surprising.  Could be something that was always there, could be PTSD.  Who knows, it wasn’t really talked about beyond Raoul feeling sorry for himself, and him being frustrated that he can’t connect to Christine on a musical level. Christine’s arc in POTO was about taking back her own power and becoming her own person. Of letting go of the past and moving forward.  This is thrown out. She is once again caught between two men in a dick measuring contest, both of which are trying to manipulate her to one side or the other, completely powerless.  This time, there really wasn’t a way for her to get it back. I feel like she felt obligated to sing for the Phantom, even without Gustave’s life being threatened, and the Phantom’s manipulation is what made Raoul leave  (Granted, I think Raoul leaving makes sense in the context of LND.)  Christine has no agency in LND. Finally, the ending of POTO is what redeems Erik.  He is the one with the biggest character arc and character growth. He learns the most.  I do believe he had a genuine heart change at the end of POTO.  What happened wasn’t what he wanted, but it was what he needed to become a better person, and start moving past his trauma. Ignoring that is a big mistake. Yet, in LND, he is back to being an arrogant, abusive, manipulative, puppet master.  Sometimes, I can see small pieces of character growth. He seems less bothered by his appearance, and maybe slightly more mature. Though, even these glimpses are often overshadowed or ignored in the next scene.   LND is NOT continuation of the characters we met in POTO. Much of the writing that connects LND with POTO is meh.  Honestly, in some ways it feels like less a sequel and more its very own adaption of Phantom. Which is half its problem.

[chuckbass-love]

Why Him? | Ransom Drysdale | Part 6

A/N : Thank you so much guys for the likes on the previous parts to this fic. I hope you like this part. Some really good parts coming up too. If I haven’t already said, this is set years before the events of Knives Out. 

Disclaimer: My work is not to be posted anywhere else other than my Tumblr, Wattpad and Ao3. However, reblogs are welcome.

Why Him? MASTERLIST

Warnings : SMUT

Claudia’s POV

My eyes open and i groan at the loud sound of my alarm, reaching my hand out to turn it off. “Good morning doll” he’s still here. “Good morning” i smile to myself, rubbing my eyes. “So daddy huh? didn’t take you as a girl with a daddy kink” oh shit. I avoid making eye contact with him as i get off the bed and walk round the room, butt naked. I stand near his side of the bed and he pulls me down, making me squeal. “It just came out” i try to lie to avoid more embarrassment “Now now doll, no need to lie” he smirks, the amusement he has of knowing something about me. “I have to pack and you’re distracting me” i state, trying to worm my way out of his grasp but failing. “You know, that’s no way to talk to daddy” my heart skips a beat. He likes it. My mind starts racing back to the steamy events of last night. Still sore from how rough he is. I stand up and walk slow to the bathroom. I look into the bathroom mirror and immediately notice the hickey on my neck. He didn’t hold back. I turn the shower on and get in when it’s the perfect temperature. I can’t believe what happened last night. I can’t believe i slept with him.

Ransom’s POV

I can’t believe it. Everything is going so well with her. It’s like it just comes so easy to both of us and i feel so comfortable around her. If things stay this good between us then i fear it will head towards me introducing my family to her and to be quite frank, i don’t think either of us are ready for that. I don’t want to scare her away. It’s not my parents or grandad it’s Meg, Joni and Walt. They hate me, always have done and always will. My thoughts are interrupted by the sound of the shower turning on, my head filled with so many ideas. Time for a little fun. I stand up, still naked from last night’s antics. I walk into the bathroom to see her washing her hair. Not for long. 

I step in, making her jump when she opens her eyes. “So beautiful doll” she bites her lips as she continues with what she’s doing. I trail my fingers all over her body, she’s trying to hold back a smile “Stop” she giggles, pushing me away slightly. I reach my hand down, brushing my fingers across her exposed sex, she flinches the sudden touch “Ransom” she moans out. “You like it when daddy touches you like that doll?” i mumble into her ear, she rests her head forward on my shoulders as i continue to rub figure eights on her clit “Ugh fuck” she throws her head back, letting the water fall on her face and neck. “I need to pac- SHIT” i insert two fingers inside of her without warning. “That’s it, cum on daddy’s fingers” i grip her face with force, making her look at me as i pleasure her.

I pull my fingers out, seeing the mess she made on them and i bring them up to my mouth, licking them clean. She whimpers at the sight before turning the shower off and shoving past me to get out. Wrapping the towel around her body and walking into the other room. I follow her, still naked. She starts getting ready. She knows exactly what she’s doing to me. She slips on sweatpants and a baggy top. Towel drying her hair too. “Sit down” she demands, looking back at me. 

I take a seat on the edge of the bed and she makes her way in between my legs, lowering herself down to her knees. She starts jerking my dick as she locks her eyes onto mine. She drives me crazy. I watch as she starts licking the tip, ridding me of the pre cum. One hand jerking me as she starts to take me into her mouth and the other playing with my balls. I throw my head back, the pleasure is insane. “Look at me daddy” this woman. She takes me to the back of her throat, bottoming me out and gagging a little. “You take me so well” she looks up again, making sure to give me direct eye contact as she takes all of me. “Fuck doll, don’t stop” i groan, gripping her hair in my hands. “Look at me when you cum daddy” she mumbles, her mouth still full. “I’m cumming” and just like that, i reach my peak. Filling her mouth up. I look at her in pure amazement as she swallows all of me. 

She stands up and continues to pack, acting like that was nothing. Now is probably time to get dressed myself. “So will i be seeing you again when we get back to Boston?” i ask, nervously. My insecurities creeping out. “What makes you think that you won’t?” she glances at me “I just wasn’t sure if we were on the same page” i explain “And what page is that?” her face now just inches from mine as i’m on the bed. “The dating kind” i state. She kisses me “I guess we are”.

*LATER THAT DAY*

Claudia’s POV

It feels so good to be home, i step foot out of my shower and into my bedroom to get into my pyjamas. I always shower after a flight. I wonder into my bathroom to turn the light off when i finish changing. I hear my phone ringing from the bed. I walk over to see it’s a FaceTime call from James. “Sup bitch” i greet as his face appears on the screen “How was New York? we’ve not spoken since before you left” i flop onto my bed and let out a breath of relief, that i’m back in my own bed tonight. 

“It was so good, okay i met Anna fucking Wintour” he’s gay and has always idolised her. “YOU DID NOT” he squeals making me almost fall off my bed from laughing. “She’s a darling, i can’t even believe it. I worked with Amy Astley mostly and Anna helped out when needed but yeah i did so much, dressed and styled models. The best experience ever” his eyes grow wide, smiling from ear to ear. “What’s new with you?” i ask as i head downstairs to make myself a hot drink, resting my phone on the stand. 

“Well, Luke is seeing someone, he’ll tell you all the details eventually. He met her at the bar the other day. Darcy is well Darcy and Me well my life is boring and you met Anna Wintour” i throw my head back in fits of giggles at his annoyed state. “I’m sorry okay, Sure there’s no gossip?” i pout, i was hoping for a good old bitch fest with my best friend. He shakes his head, trying to think. 

“Oh, i didn’t mention Britney. Jake cheated and you’ll never guess who with” i start pouring the hot water into my mug “Wai-” the door-bell goes. “Who’s at my door this late” i wonder, James raises his eyebrows “A booty call perhaps?” i give him the ‘yeah right” look. Waiting for the right time timing to tell him and the others about Ransom. I head to the door, opening it and looking around. No one is here. I then look down to see a large bouquet of roses. Wonder who these are from.

I take them into the kitchen, flashing them towards the camera for James to see. “Who sent you roses?” i furrow my brows, pulling the note from the side of the bouquet. It reads :

‘Claudia,

I’ve had the greatest time with you the past few days

I’d love to continue getting to know you more

Meet me at 1387 Chow-Stone Road tomorrow

5:00pm

Wear something fancy doll

Lots of love

Ransom x’

I cover my face with my hands instantly. This man is something else. I don’t realise i’m in my own world until i hear James talking. “So who are they from?” he asks, once again being that i ignored him the first time. “So i met a guy” he grins, squealing so loud, i swear one day i’m gonna lose my hearing. “Tell me about him” my cheeks heat up like crazy as my mind flashes through all the times i’ve had with Ransom so far, leading me to fill James in about it all.

“YOU HAD SEX?” he shouts, i give him the shush signal but he doesn’t listen. “My neighbours will hear at this rate but yes to answer your question. We had sex and let me tell you. I’ve never had an experience like that before” i take a sip of my tea. My mind yet again racing through the events of last night and this morning. “He is the biggest i’ve ever had and the tongue skills” James widens his eyes “Oh dayum, You have to rub it in don’t you? Not all of us are getting laid here” my cheesy grin coming out to play. “It says to wear something fancy. James you have to help me” instant panic shoots over me. I grab my phone and head up to my closet. 

“Okay, do i go with the red or the blue” i hold up two dresses, the same but just in different colours. “The red one all the way” i agree as i hang it up, ready for tomorrow. “Wear red lacy underwear too and black heels” perks of having a gay best friend. He’s got the best advice, fashion and relationship wise. We end the call eventually as the sudden wave of tiredness flies over me. My bed is calling. 

*THE NEXT DAY*

4:00pm rolls around and i’ve just showered, done my makeup and styled my hair. Now time for the finishing touches. The dress and shoes. I zip it up and walk to my bed, sitting on the edge to put my heels on. I never dress up like this but i can’t say i don’t enjoy it. Aside from the heels that is. I lock up and make my way to my car to drive to the address he gave. As i pull up, i see a small Italian restaurant, my favourite. I park up and head inside. Ransom is sat at the candle lit table. The restaurant is empty. “Hi” he smiles as he lays his eyes upon me. “Hi” i walk over slowly, trying not to look overly keen by rushing. Silly i know.

“You look incredible” he looks me up and down, taking a deep breath. “Not so bad yourself Drysdale” i wink as i go to sit down, he pulls the chair out for me. “I was worried you weren’t gonna come. He confesses. He looks so nervous. “Are you okay?” i ask him, a hint of worry in my voice. “I’m fine it’s just, seeing you like this, it’s driving me crazy” i stare at him with surprise as i eye him up. He orders drinks and food for us both, i get lost in his appearance. He’s wearing a full blown suit. The effort he’s gone to for tonight is making my stomach do backflips. He’s so handsome under the candle light that fills the place. Not a single ceiling light on.

Our drinks arrive and i sip at it slowly as we make conversation. The one thing i’m dying to ask but i’m unsure. He notices. “What is it doll? You look bothered” there’s that nickname again, my legs turning to jelly. “I just, ever since you briefly brought it up the other night. I wanted to as-” he cuts me off “You want to know more about my family?” how did he know? “Well what did you want to know?” he sips his drink, a non-alcoholic beer since he will have to drive home. “You said that they’ve always hated you and always will. What makes you think that?” i purse my lips, staring him directly in the eye. Awaiting his answer.

“Well my cousin Meg calls me a trust fund prick if that’s some insight. Joni, Meg’s mom just thinks i’m troubled. Doesn’t stop her making digs at me to get a rise though and Walt, my uncle. He’s quite something. My last girlfriend said he asked her if she was my hooker” this isn’t family. That’s not how families behave. Not going to lie, the thought of meeting them makes me nervous but the thought of them putting him down is worse. “You know that’s no way to treat family. No matter how much they might hate you. I think it’s wrong and i’m sorry you have to put up with that” i hold his hand across the table and he nods in agreement when our food arrives. 

We spend the next hour or so just talking and joking around with each other. He’s just so different to how he was that Saturday night. So caring and gentleman like. It’s nice. I like him a lot.

A/N : I’m going to make a masterlist of this fic so all the parts will be in one place. I’ll link the masterlist on each part when i have done it. I’m proof reading and editing part 7 tonight and it will be up tomorrow afternoon.

[fictionadventurer]

Here, have a bunch of scattered thoughts, observations, and opinions about Greta Gerwig’s Little Women:

(Spoilers below, which wouldn’t usually be a big deal for something based on a classic novel, but I will be discussing the ending).

General Thoughts

The colors in this movie are lovely. The cinematography is lovely. This is a movie with so many wonderful things to look at. (Though the lighting was too dark in some scenes).

I loved how tactile this movie was. The things on-screen just feel so real and textured. I don’t know, like, there’s a fence Jo climbs over, and we see the splinters in the fence and it just feels weighty and textured. It made me appreciate the things in this movie’s world and in ours.

The music was great. I want the soundtrack.

I loved, loved, loved all the dancing scenes. Not sedate, not romantic, just so much vibrant joy and life. Jo’s dance in the pub was one of the highlights of her story. Almost as good were her and Laurie’s ridiculous dances at their first meeting–you see how well they get along as friends. The focus on dancing is definitely one of my favorite parts of the movie (and another reason I want the soundtrack). 

A lot of the acting had weird rhythms to it. Especially in group scenes where there was a lot of talking, it felt like people were just rapid-fire reciting lines from the book, rather than saying real things that real people would say. 

The beginning confused me. I couldn’t figure out whether the woman was supposed to be Jo March or Louisa May Alcott (part of the problem is that I wasn’t expecting a blonde Jo). I kind of wish Gerwig had just made a Louisa May Alcott biopic if she wanted to explore Little Women’s publication process, because it just makes this story more confusing.

The flashbacks were less confusing than I was expecting. There were a few times where it took a few seconds to figure out which part of the timeline we were in, but for the most part, I could follow it because I was familiar with the book. I’m not sure I could have followed it if I hadn’t been familiar with the book.

Some of the flashbacks layered together really well.  Other times, it just felt like we were jumping randomly through time. At some points, it didn’t feel like a story. It was just stuff happening, and even if it looked nice, I couldn’t connect to it emotionally.

I kind of like the way they layered Beth’s original bout of illness with her death, but then the story moves on to other storylines and other flashbacks and the death doesn’t really have an impact. Her death is just another thing that happens, rather than an emotional turning point.

The ending is very frustrating. So many of my thoughts about the movie in general are shaped by that ending, so it’s going to get it’s own section (and probably at least two other posts about it).

Character-Focused Thoughts

Laura Dern was a good Marmee. A bit livelier than might be expected, while still being warm and motherly. I can believe this Marmee would struggle with her temper.

(For some reason, I just really like Laura Dern. I don’t know why. Thus, I can’t give a real assessment of her Marmee because I just like that she was in the role).

That conversation between Marmee and Jo about her temper made no sense. Marmee starts out saying that she’s learned to control her temper, and when Jo says she wants to be like that, Marmee responds, “I hope you’ll do better. There are some natures too noble to curb, too lofty to bend.” What? It sounds like she’s saying that Jo doesn’t need to change, which is the exact opposite point this scene should be making. Unless she’s trying to say that she wants Jo to do more than curb her temper, but become someone so strong in her morals that she can stand strong against the temptations in life. But that’s not clear from the scene, and it’s easy to read it as a vague “empowerment” message. It’s another point where conflating Jo with Louisa May Alcott (by giving Marmee a line from one of Alcott’s mother’s letters) made the story more confusing.

To my surprise, I really liked Emma Watson as Meg. Or at least, I liked Meg and was able to forget that she was played by Emma Watson. She was a bit distant, a bit bland, but there was also something compelling about her sedate sweetness. (I loved her purple dress).

Her little subplot with John and the silk was my favorite part of the plot. Just when I was thinking, “This is just like other Little Women adaptations where I can’t connect to the characters”, we get that stunning scene of them discussing the price of the silk and I get teary-eyed over John’s regret that he’s too poor to give his wife what she wants. His compassion warring with his frustration, his love warring with practicality. Exquisite. And the resolution was perfect, with both of them willing to sacrifice for the other’s happiness.

As you can probably guess, I loved James Norton as John Brooke and wish he’d had more to do in the story.

While I kind of wish that we’d seen more of John’s love story with Meg, I also kind of like that we kept the focus on their married life. This movie’s so obsessed with marriage, but this is the only part of the movie where we get to explore what marriage actually looks like, rather than just listening to characters talk about their opinions of it.

Jo was lively and vibrant and I loved how they kept her relationship with Laurie so thoroughly brotherly (until the ending, which I’ll get to later). And I loved the “I’m so lonely” line, but the movie didn’t really do anything with it. There was so much potential for character development, but then she just didn’t develop. It’s the exact opposite of everything that I talked about in my essay about the ‘18 Little Women. The earlier adaptation got a lot wrong, but Jo’s arc was strong and compelling. This movie just assumed that Jo’s already great and didn’t give her an arc at all.

Beth was sweet and adorable and I wish we’d gotten more of her. The scene where she thanks Mr. Laurence for the piano was one of my favorite character moments of the movie. Her barely audible, stammering ‘thank you’ is such Shy Kid Culture.

Florence Pugh played older Amy very well, and highlighting her practicality was an interesting choice. But why didn’t they hire a kid to play younger Amy? She was ridiculous in the role of a twelve-year-old girl. I spent half the movie trying to figure out what young Amy’s voice reminded me of, until I finally realized: It sounds exactly like Mallory from Studio C whenever she plays a little kid in a sketch. I doubt that sketch comedy was what these people were going for in their Oscar-nominated movie.

Amy and Laurie’s romance had very interesting moments to it, and I love how they pushed each other to change. I liked the idea of it (and loved the scenery it took place in). But as two characters who fall in love, I’m not sure that what we saw on-screen was enough to make me really believe in it.

Mr. March was almost a non-character. I really wish that he’d been more present, and I wish they’d highlighted his letter and his role in his daughters’ character development more. (But this movie wasn’t really interested in the virtue-development part of the plot). He was bashed a lot by Aunt March and we didn’t get a chance to see if she was right about him or not.

Aunt March is a delightful old-lady character. I loved a lot about her. I didn’t love how she was a mouthpiece for their most ham-handed ideas about marriage.

Hannah was excellent. Added a nice dose of practical common sense. One of my favorite characters.

Making Mr. Laurence into a Southern gentleman was an interesting choice, especially given how this episode highlighted the Civil War part of the setting. I liked him, especially his relationship with Beth.

I laughed during Laurie’s first appearance, when the camera slowed down and made it into the most cliche romantic-comedy moment possible. Then when he spoke, I understood for the first time in my life why people like Timothee Chalamet. The goodwill toward his character was not to last.

Brotherly Laurie was adorable and likable. One of my favorite scenes was when he first meets the March family, and just stands there silently appreciating their lively, loving, comfortable family atmosphere.

Romantic interest Laurie was a jerk and a creep. The way he kept touching people who didn’t want to be touched, forcing affections on people who didn’t want them. Not cool. And “She calls me ‘my lord’?” Creeeeeepy.

After all the hype over the smock scene, I was expecting a lot more. I was like, “That’s it?” Not that I’m complaining–I was expecting something a lot more overtly sexual and I like that it was restrained.

(The cloak that Amy puts on after the smock scene? Gorgeous. I want it.)

I hate that Jo decides she wants to marry Laurie. After a whole movie spent showing how she’s right that their relationship was brotherly and that Amy’s a better fit for him, suddenly out of nowhere she just wants to attach herself to him because she’s lonely. And then it fails not because Jo has any revelations about herself or life, but because he’s already taken. It was just so bizarre. Especially in light of the ending, but again, I’ll get to it later. (Probably in another post).

Bhaer was a lovely character. I don’t understand why they made him French, but he’s such a steady, sensible, caring presence for Jo, so sweet and intelligent, and the movie completely failed to make use of his character and the arc he could have provided for Jo. 

The Ending

It’s my biggest source of frustration. I’d been fully spoiled for it, knew that it was “ambiguous”, and came fully prepared to do as many mental gymnastics as necessary to allow for the interpretation that Jo and Bhaer’s love story is the “real” ending. I couldn’t do it. There is no way that I can see that chase in the rain as anything other than a “forced” ending to the fictional story in Jo’s book.

When Bhaer visits the March’s, Jo’s not warm. She’s not happy. She’s just stunned and awkward. Frederick saying that he’s taking the job in California is nothing more than the most blatant set-up for a romantic-comedy ending. Even when he leaves, Jo doesn’t seem regretful, he’s just like, “Come and visit me sometime,” and Jo’s only response is, “Yeah, I probably won’t.”

Then, when she turns around, everyone has the most forced, zombie-like smiles on their faces. “You love him,” they all insist, and Jo is just baffled, like she’s in a Twilight Zone episode and struggling to assert her reality against a world that’s warped around her. Then they railroad Jo into a romance plot, setting up everything for the romantic-comedy chase in the rain against all of Jo’s protests that it’s unnecessary. And then the actual declaration of love is so entwined with Jo’s talk to her publisher that I can’t see it as anything other than fiction. The lines are such vague romance stuff that seems unconnected to anything that we’ve seen in Jo and Bhaer’s relationship through the rest of the movie. “I have nothing to give you,” he says, even though there’s never been a mention of him as poor before, no indication that this would have been a problem for their romance.

And then we see the lovely sunlit ending where everyone is happy and living active, fulfilled, love-and-service-filled lives, contrasted with the cold sterility of Jo watching her words get bound into a book. Don’t get me wrong, the binding process was beautiful to watch, but putting it forth as a “better” ending than Jo and Bhaer running a school together was absolutely ridiculous.

At best, I could try to say that the sunlit ending is a happy future brought about by the publication of the book–the royalties fund the school, everyone can be together, and Bhaer works at the school and he and Jo are friends and colleagues even if they don’t get married. But it’s given such an unrealistic gloss, and when the scene fades out and turns into the cover of the book, it seems like the final stamp saying that this is all fiction, and the only real thing about this ending is the book that Jo holds in her hands.

Instead of being surrounded by loving family and friends, she’s alone, holding a book. A book that isn’t even the book she wanted to write, a book that forced her to abandon her artistic principles for the sake of money. And to me, she looks like she’s about to cry (not happy tears), and it’s just such a bleak, sterile ending to a movie with the potential for such vigorous life.

(I do kind of wish I’d seen it without being spoiled for the ending and not knowing Gerwig’s thoughts about the “best” ending for Jo, because I’ll never know if I would have come to the same interpretation of the ending if I’d been coming in completely blind. I kind of feel like I’d have had similar thoughts, but I’ll never know.)

There’s so much more I could say about this ending, but all my thoughts are connected to how it affects the arcs and messages of the rest of the movie, and this post is far too long already. I’ll need at least one significant essay and at least 1-2 other posts to untangle exactly how this ending affects my feelings about this movie.

[365days365movies]

February 4, 2021: You’ve Got Mail (Part 2)

You hear that? You’ve Got Mail, and it contains Part 2 of the Review! Check out Part 1 for the rest.

The Shop Around the Corner is beginning to get more public support, with Fox Books taking the role of the villain. But, OK, real talk here...it’s too fuckin’ late. Look, I’m not exactly the biggest supporter of the corporate capitalism that dominates the country, then and now, but...you’re not getting rid of this megastore. And I’m not exactly against a way to get books at lower prices. AND, for that matter, Kathleen’s shop is ONLY A CHILDREN’S BOOK STORE. Where am I going to get my tasteful hardcore Fabio-esque erotica, HUH? Or, for that matter, REALLY GOOD LOOKING DESERTS? Fox Books, that’s where! Or, y’know, at the 241 Starbucks throughout the city. Actually number, by the way, as of 2019.

As if to prove my point, the increased publicity basically changes nothing, and the store’s still on its way under. Kathleen, scared and desperate, formally asks Joe for help, and the two agree to meet. And I’m sure it’s gonna go totally fine. Kevin gives Joe a pep talk (I really like Kevin, by the way), and Joe’s FULLY PREPARED to leave Patricia and marry her on the spot. Still, nervous, he asks Kevin to look.

And yeah, that’s when Joe finds out that it’s Kathleen. And, although he initially leaves...he comes back to see her, pretending not to be the dude, WHEN HE IS OBVIOUSLY THE DUDE. This results in the two having a tete-a-tete once more. It also results in Joe learning what Kathleen thinks of his e-mail persona, making this AN ENTIRELY one-sided relationship. And goddamn, she is also EXTREMELY mean to him. What she says to him hurts ME on a personal level, GODDAMN

This movie is very weirdly mean-spirited, Jesus. And this is also after Joe points out that Kathleen’s basically cheating on Frank, and she BRUSHES IT AWAY LIKE AN INSECT. Joe, clearly (and somewhat understandably) hurt, also breaks it off online, having experienced the verbal assault (also somewhat justified, to be fair) from Kathleen.

The next morning, Joe has officially broken it off in his own head, while Kathleen is convinced that something’s happened to her online boyfriend. The workers at the shop believe that he was actually arrested, as the “Rooftop Killer,” who’s been roaming the city, and was just arrested that night. Later that day, she writes to Joe once again, admitting that she feels bad for the words she said to Joe the previous night, and that she still wishes to meet him at some point.

And Joe, conflicted and confused, reads it and walks away. And during what is a VERY neat editing flourish, he constantly walks past the computer over time, until eventually deciding to reply to her. While he initially tries to make stupid, overcomplicated excuses for “not showing up,” he eventually replies by saying he can’t tell her, but asks for forgiveness. And his letter, despite the circumstances...is actually somewhat heartfelt. He even takes responsibility for his own actions in their conflict, whether or not she realizes it. And the two continue their correspondence.

Time marches on. We find out that Birdie maybe fucked the Spanish dictator in the ‘60s; and Kathleen breaks up with Bernard from Megamind (my girlfriend pointed this out, AND I CANNOT UNSEE IT, HOLY SHIT), after it’s revealed that they...actually don’t love each other, even a little bit. Man, what is it with Meg Ryan amicably breaking up with guys in a restaurant in New York City in February? I hate the fact that this is a specific story beat I’ve seen twice in two days.

The Shop Around the Corner officially closes (and a customer suggests bombing Fox Books, FUCKIN’ YIKES, PRE-9/11 NYC), and Kathleen visits the giant bookstore for the first time. We see the children’s section, and I gotta fuckin tell you...I like the giant bookstore way more. Yeah, sorry, I’m all about that bookcore, that small independent bookstore aesthetic...but DAMN, I love this store!

It’s also revealed that Kathleen was completely right about the employee’s lack of knowledge on books, which Joe sees first hand. Which shows that they...both had good points...huh. That’s...actually a good take on their antagonism. Interesting. Go on, movie, go on. We also find out that Kathleen Kelly has a reputation for good taste and a comprehensive knowledge of children’s books.

This is revealed by Patricia, who’s suddenly revealed to be a...heartless bitch? Self-admitted, even. That revelation is accompanied by Joe and Patricia being trapped in an elevator, where the bitchiness compounds further, and he IMMEDIATELY LEAVES HIS GIRLFRIEND. Should’ve built that up a little better, guys. Or do something else, like...I’ll wait for the Review.

Their correspondence continues, and Kathleen says goodbye to her mother’s store, and the ghosts of her happy memories with her there. It’s poignant, gotta say. The next morning, both John and his dad appear to be on the outs with their significant others, and are living on their boats. A conversation between the two makes Joe realizes that he’d like to be, well...happy in a relationship? A legitimate revelation.

Joe decides to try and make amends with Kathleen, who’s not exactly happy to see him. She’s also currently sick, but Joe’s brought her flowers. They have a conversation, during which they start to have a heart-to-heart, and Joe drops the name of the movie. Smooooooooth.

The two begin a friendship in person, with Kathleen not knowing that Joe is the person she’s been talking to, while Joe is...completely...aware...this is not OK, is it? This relationship is entirely one-sided, and in Joe’s favor. And I genuinely don’t like that. I get that, back in the late ‘90s, during the very fledgling era of internet relationships, that this is a novelty and cute. But, in a post-catfishing time, this movie has aged, once again...like vintage milk. Not fucking well.

Also, real talk, I get that they’re building their relationship as a friendship post-rivalry...but he DID still CRUSH your bookstore. He crushed your mother’s legacy in favor of his own family legacy. It’s, uh...not great, to be honest. And it’s also not terribly convincing, sorry to say. The romantic connection sort of comes out of nowhere. And as the film ends, the weird power play just gets worse and worse. I dunno, it just feels...odd to me.

At the last moment, before Kathleen is set to meet her online friend/love interest, Joe is walking with her and reveals his feelings for her, which are now quite romantic. She’s quite close to reciprocating, but leaves to go on her potential date with the mystery man. She heads to Riverside Park, where the two are to finally meet.

And they do. And she wanted it to be him, so badly.

AND I WOULD HAVE PUNCHED HIM IN THE GODDAMN FACE HOLY SHIT. HE WOULD BE ON. THE. FLOOR IF I WERE IN HER PLACE. I would be FEELING HIS TEETH on my GODDAMN KNUCKLES, I TELL YOU WHAT.

...Yeah, that’s You’ve Got Mail, and I got some fuckin’ ISSUES. See you in the Review, yeah?

[resilientsovl]

BASIC INFORMATION

FULL NAME:  samuel  william  winchester. PRONUNCIATION:  pronounced  how  it’s  spelled. MEANING:  so  from   the  hebrew  name  שְׁמוּאֵל,  it  means  god  has  heard,  or  name  of  god.  it’s  a  little  ironic  considering  sam  is  lucifer,  god’s  fallen  son’s,  true  vessel.   REASONING:  sam  was  named  after  his  maternal  grandfather,  samuel  campbell. NICKNAME(S):  sam,  sammy,  little  winchester,  moose,  738273  other  height  related  nicknames. PREFERRED NAME(S):   sam. BIRTH DATE:  may  2,  1983. AGE:  honestly  he’s  not  sure.  he’s  died  3-4  times,  been  the  vessel  for  demons  and  archangels  which  probably  stalled  his  physical  aging  too.  i  say  he’s  probably  biologically  somewhere  around  35,  even  though  he’s  technically  47ish. ZODIAC: taurus. GENDER:  cismale. PRONOUNS:   he/him. ROMANTIC ORIENTATION:  heteroromantic. SEXUAL ORIENTATION:  bisexual.  (  he  can  appreciate  that  men  are  attractive,  has  probably  even  slept  with  a  couple,  but  has  no  desire  to  be  in  romantic,  serious,  relationships  with  men.  ) NATIONALITY:  american. ETHNICITY:   wonderbread  white. CURRENT LOCATION:  san  francisco,  ca. LIVING CONDITIONS:   a  crappy  two  bedroom  apartment  he  rents  by  the  month.  it’s  small,  not  in  a  great  neighborhood,  but  it  does  the  trick.   TITLE(S):   n/a.

BACKGROUND

BIRTH PLACE:   lawrence,  kansas. HOMETOWN:  technically  lawrence  kansas,  but  they  moved  around  frequently.   SOCIAL CLASS:  blue  collar. EDUCATION LEVEL:   undergraduate  degree  from  stanford.   FATHER:   john  winchester. MOTHER:   mary  winchester  (  neé  campbell  ).   SIBLING(S):   dean  winchester,  adam  milligan  (  half  ).   BIRTH ORDER:  dean,  sam,  adam.   CHILDREN:  jack  kline  (  adopted  /  unofficially  ) PET(S):   n/a. OTHER IMPORTANT RELATIVES:  bobby  singer,  pseudo  uncle.   castiel,  pseudo  brother  /  brother-in-law.   SIGNIFICANT  OTHER:   natasha  herrera,  wife.  (  separated  ) PREVIOUS RELATIONSHIPS:   jessica  moore,  amelia  richardson,  meg,  sarah  blake,  ruby,  a  few  one  night  stands,  amy  pond  (  first  kiss  ),  etc.   ARRESTS?:  a  few,  yes.   PRISON TIME?:  minimal,  seen  in  folsom  prison  blues.  

OCCUPATION & INCOME

PRIMARY SOURCE OF INCOME:   credit  card  scams,  illegal  activity.   SECONDARY SOURCE OF INCOME:   n/a. TERTIARY SOURCE(S) OF INCOME:   hunting,  but  it  pays  for  shit.   APPROXIMATE AMOUNT PER YEAR:   unknown.   CONTENT WITH THEIR JOB (OR LACK THERE OF)?:   this  is  never  the  job  he  wanted.  so  no,  definitely  not.   PAST JOB(S):   student.   SPENDING HABITS:  extremely  frugal,  only  on  necessities.   MOST VALUABLE POSSESSION:  john  winchester’s  journal.  

SKILLS & ABILITIES

PHYSICAL STRENGTH:   peak  physical  condition,  human,  in-shape.   OFFENSE:   extremely  skilled  with  weapons  and  hand  to  hand.   DEFENSE:  extremely  skilled  with  lethal  and  non-lethal  defensive  moves.   SPEED:  faster  than  average. INTELLIGENCE:  educated  and  above  average.   ACCURACY:   above  average. AGILITY:   above  average.   STAMINA:   above  average.   TEAMWORK:   below  average.  he  doesn’t  work  well  with  people  he  doesn’t  know  or  trust.  it  takes  time  to  develop  a  bond  /  ease  of  working  with  others.   TALENTS:   computer  skills,  digesting  information,  critical  thinking  skills. SHORTCOMINGS:   stubborn,  naive,  reckless,  deep  psychological  trauma,  suicidal  ideation,  a  nice  grabbag  of  issues.   LANGUAGE(S) SPOKEN:   latin,  english,  probably  a  bunch  of  other  old,  dead,  languages  that  might  come  in  handy.  he  probably  also  took  spanish  in  school.   DRIVE?:   yes. JUMP-STAR A CAR?:   yes. CHANGE A FLAT TIRE?:   yes.   RIDE A BICYCLE?:   yes. SWIM?:   yes.   PLAY AN INSTRUMENT?:   no. PLAY CHESS?:   yes. BRAID HAIR?:   no. TIE A TIE?:   yes. PICK A LOCK?:  yes.  

PHYSICAL APPEARANCE & CHARACTERISTICS

FACE CLAIM:   jared  padalecki.   EYE COLOR:   hazel. HAIR COLOR:   brown. HAIR TYPE/STYLE:   long  and  flowing.   GLASSES/CONTACTS?:   n/a. DOMINANT HAND:   right.   HEIGHT:  6′4 WEIGHT:   220  ish  lbs. BUILD:   slender  but  muscular.   EXERCISE HABITS:  rigorous.  he  jogs  in  the  mornings,  does  sit  ups  /  pull  ups  at  night,  and  lifts  weights  during  the  day  in  between  cases.  he  stays  in  shape.   SKIN TONE:   tanned.   TATTOOS:   anti-possession  tattoo  over  his  heart.   it  was  carved  out  in  2026  but  the  scar  has  been  tattooed  over,  replacing  the  original.   PEIRCINGS:   none.   MARKS/SCARS:   he’s  died  and  come  back  so  many  times,  it’s  hard  to  say  what’s  still  there  and  what’s  gone.   he  does  still  have  the  bullet  wound  from  where  he  shot  chuck  though.  it  never  healed.   NOTABLE FEATURES:   nose,  hair.   USUAL EXPRESSION:   smirk  of  disbelief,  concern.   CLOTHING STYLE:   lumberjack  lesbian.   JEWELRY:    he  wears  a  chain  with  his  wedding  ring  around  his  neck,  the  one  he  never  got  to  put  on  for  real.   ALLERGIES:   none.   BODY TEMPERATURE:   normal. DIET:   not  great.  hence  the  need  to  work  out. PHYSICAL AILMENTS:   general  fatigue  from  a  rigorously  active  lifestyle.  

PSYCHOLOGY

JUNG TYPE:  INFJ JUNG SUBTYPE:  Introvert(47%)  iNtuitive (34%)  Feeling(31%)  Judging(38%) You have moderate preference of Introversion over Extraversion (47%) You have moderate preference of Intuition over Sensing (34%) You have moderate preference of Feeling over Thinking (31%) You have moderate preference of Judging over Perceiving (38%) ENNEAGRAM TYPE:   the  reformer  or  the  challenger.   MORAL ALIGNMENT:  chaotic  good.   TEMPERAMENT:   melancholic.   ELEMENT:   taurus  are  usually  earth  elements,  but  i  think  air  suits  sam  better.   PRIMARY INTELLIGENCE TYPE:   logical-mathematical,  probably.   APPROXIMATE IQ:   unknown.  we  know  he  scored  a  174  on  the  LSAT,  which  is  incredible,  but  that  doesn’t  always  translate  over  to  IQ.  i  would  say  he’s  got  a  pretty  high  IQ  even  if  he  lacks  a  few  common  sense  points.   MENTAL CONDITIONS/DISORDERS:   undiagnosed  depression,  anxiety,  PTSD,  imposter  syndrome,  and  survivor’s  guilt  —  and  that’s  just  the  tip  of  the  iceberg.   don’t  ask  me  to  psychoanalyze  the  winchesters,  it’ll  break  us  all.   SOCIABILITY:   he  doesn’t  seek  it  out  but  he  can  keep  up  with  the  joneses.   EMOTIONAL STABILITY:   not  good.  he  has  exhibited  severe  signs  of  codependency,  suicidal  ideation,  lack  of  regard  for  his  own  life,  and  believe  that  he’s  cursed.  the  boy  is  a  mess.   OBSESSION(S):  vengeance  after  significant  loss,  saving  people  (  even  if  it’s  from  themselves  ),  trying  to  make  up  for  all  of  the  blood  on  his  hands.   PHOBIA(S):   clowns.  not  a  fan.   ADDICTION(S):   demon  blood  (  previously  ) DRUG USE:   no. ALCOHOL USE:  recreationally.   PRONE TO VIOLENCE?:  can  be,  yes.  

MANNERISMS

SPEECH STYLE:  casual. ACCENT:   american.  nothing  specific.   QUIRKS:   chewing  on  pen  caps,  tapping  to  songs  on  the  radio  against  the  steering  wheel  with  his  fingers.   HOBBIES:   reading,  researching,  pool,  morning  crosswords.   HABITS:   stress  pacing,  irritability  under  extreme  pressure. NERVOUS TICKS:   jaw  clench,  nostrils  flaring,  hands  curled  into  fists.   DRIVES/MOTIVATIONS:  vengeance,  restoring  order  /  protecting  people,  survival.   FEARS:  losing  the  people  he  loves,  hurting  innocents,  isolation.   POSITIVE TRAITS:   dependable,  loyal,  protective,  determined,  strong,  honest,  vulnerable. NEGATIVE TRAITS:  impulsive,  reckless,  guilt-stricken,  naive,  obtuse,  too  trusting.   SENSE OF HUMOR:   dry,  sarcastic.   DO THEY CURSE OFTEN?:   no. CATCHPHRASE(S):  damnit, dean.    jerk  /  bitch.  

FAVORITES

ACTIVITY:   long  drives.   ANIMAL:  hedgehogs. BEVERAGE:   monster  energy  drinks.   BOOK:   probably  the  classics,  or  something  by  neil  gaiman. CELEBRITY:   he  doesn’t  have  one. COLOR:   blue.   DESIGNER:   doesn’t  have  one.   FOOD:  philly  cheesesteak.   maybe  mashed  potatoes,  if  not  the  cheesesteak.   FLOWER:   sunflowers. GEM:   none. HOLIDAY:    none.   MODE OF TRANSPORTATION:   car.   MOVIE:   mallrats.   MUSICAL ARTIST:  none.  he’ll  just  listen  to  whatever  they  have  in  the  car,  or  is  on  the  radio.  before  i  think  he  was  probably  into  top  40,  maybe  even  classic  rock  as  much  as  he  complained  about it.   QUOTE/SAYING:   none. SCENERY:   autumn  leaves  falling  from  trees.   SCENT:   linen.   SPORT:   none.  he  doesn’t  care.   SPORTS TEAM:   see  above.   TELEVISION SHOW:   none.  he  probably  only  watches  soap  operas  every  now  and  then  again.  he  doesn’t  watch  anything  he  would  have  to  invest  time  and  energy  in.   maybe  pawnstars,  or  mythbusters.   WEATHER:  drizzle.   VACATION DESTINATION:  somewhere  warm,  tropic,  and  free  of  monsters.  

ATTITUDES

GREATEST DREAM:   to  have  a  normal  life.   he  knows  he’ll  never  get  it,  has  come  to  terms  with  the  fact  that  he  was  never  going  to  be  normal.   GREATEST FEAR:   ending  up  alone,  watching  everyone  he  loves  die.   MOST AT EASE WHEN:  around  the  people  he  loves.   LEAST AT EASE WHEN:   on  a  hunt  that’s  starting  to  go  awry.   WORST POSSIBLE THING THAT COULD HAPPEN:   turning  into  a  monster  —  the  very  thing  he’s  dedicated  his  life  to  hunting,  or  becoming  evil.  being  forced  into  killing  his  own  brother,  or  someone  he  loves  like  family,  would  also  make  the  list.   BIGGEST ACHIEVEMENT:  in  a  really  soft  way,  i  want  to  say  it’s  becoming  a  pseudo  dad  to  jack.  it  might  not  have  been  what  he  saw  for  himself,  or  how  he  imagined  being  a  dad,  but  he  loves  the  kid.   if  not  that,  maybe  stopping  the  apocalypse.   not  that  it  lasted  for  very  long.   BIGGEST REGRET:   not  telling  jessica  the  truth.  he  will  always  believe  he  got  her  killed.  that  guilt  will  set  with  him  until  the  day  he  dies.   MOST EMBARRASSING MOMENT:   too  many  to  count.   BIGGEST SECRET:   he  remembers  a  lot  of  what  the  demon  did  when  it  possessed  him  in  2026.   he  fought  with  everything  he  had,  but  every  time  he  broke  through  they  pushed  him  back  down.   TOP PRIORITIES:  figuring  out  what  comes  next,  i  suppose.  

[apolloappreciationblog]

What do you love about Trials of Apollo and why? How'd you get into the series? What do you hope/think will happen in books 4 and 5?

Thanks so much for asking! This got really long so I’m putting it below. I guess it’s also sort of like an about me also in regards to the fandom, for anyone who wants to talk Trials (please do, I’m obsessed)

How did I get into Trials?

I read PJO a long time ago back when it was new, fresh, and super popular, and instantly fell in love with the series (like everyone else) but fell off the boat a bit after the first Heroes book came out (I guess, also like everyone else). It’s not that I didn’t like it, I was busy at the time, and since The Lost Hero had just come out, I lost track of waiting for the next books to come out and somehow just forgot about them as a whole (No I still haven’t read them all (oops). Yes, I’ve been stuck on the “It’s Percy! Oh my gods he has amnesia!” cliffhanger for years now).

It’s been a long time since then, and I thought I’d pretty much made peace with the series. But for some reason I was smacked over the head with nostalgia after someone I know mentioned how fun it would be to play a powered by the apocalypse game in a PJO setting (I’m a pretty huge tabletop rpg nerd). Naturally that thought sent me down a rabbit hole and I decided I was going to literally build a big homebrew system for PJO (which I still am, currently), despite the fact that I hadn’t engaged with the series in years. My memory was far from perfect, and I ended up doing a ton of research-sifting through wikis and even rereading some parts of the books-and while I looked around I noticed there was a new series being written. I read the synopsis and instantly fell in love. I’m a huge fan of the tropes present in trials, and the more I thought about what ridiculous shenanigans were possible from the idea, the more I absolutely could not resist reading them. I came to be entertained and stayed for the heart wrenching character development, but I’m sure we’re all the same.

Which brings me to your first question! What do I love about Trials?

First and foremost I am a real sucker for the whole general concept. Like, taking one of the gods and making them a pathetic mortal teenager?? Making it PJO’s Apollo of all gods??? I don’t think I would have ever said I needed that absolutely horrific and yet genius concept, but here we are. I was also under the impression this was a freakishly fun spinoff series (RIP me), and I mean, it kind of was, for like…half of book one.

And then, oh gods, I realized Rick had made this self important asshole likeable. In fact, even more than that, he had made him a sympathetic and compelling asshole. Where it was completely fine and fun to relish in Apollo’s hilarious punishment in book one, suddenly it wasn’t funny anymore (ok maybe just a little)-it was heartbreaking (Rick you monster, stop making him wet his pants!). But hey, that’s good writing for you.

So basically I really love the concept and, well, I just really love Apollo. The books are executed so good you don’t even realize you are completely rooting for the kid you were laughing at two books ago (because, like YIKES man, that ego!), and gladly die for him (No? Just me?) and the character development is such a subtle and delicate change, but it’s noticeable, really effective, and extremely compelling (and heartbreaking, mostly, in a good way). The comedy is on point (Sometimes it’s hard to tell if Apollo’s taste in pop culture is just bad and cringey or if it’s Rick. The truth is that it’s both and thanks, I hate it) and all of the characters, both new and old, are nostalgic and fun, and there are real reasons you can understand for every action they take and thing they say. The plot doesn’t let you down with twists and turns, but also easy to grasp and follow, and keeps you turning the page even if it’s 3am and you have class at 8. I found that TOA’s books seemed to be more focused, every encounter, no matter how seemingly random, pushes the protagonists in a way that progresses something meaningful, whether it’s the plot or their own development. It’s also really nice to see Rick return to his first person roots, especially when he does it so damn well.

It’s a fresh take on a series I grew up with and it’s just as enchanting now as it was when I was a kid. I do have some gripes with a few things in the series (Listen, I didn’t even read HoO but I loved Jason) but overall it does what it’s set out to do really well, and Rick sure knows what he’s doing (for better or worse).

What are my hopes or predictions for the rest of the series?

Oh boy. Honestly, the overall plot of Trials being “Will Apollo be restored to godhood or not?” is probably the worst plot for my heart, since I don’t even know, ever? We all know it’s going to be a yes, but at the same time…

I didn’t read HoO, though I know the general plot of it, so I can’t really do any elaborate theorycrafting in regards to Camp Jupiter or the roman demigods, but here are my thoughts on the big plot themes:

Promises Kept: Rick’s made it really clear that Apollo didn’t give a flying hoot about promises or oaths before Trials, but it’s quickly evolved into one of the biggest themes in the books. Apollo will keep his promises, maybe even regardless of the cost, and I think we’ll really see that shift in the next two books given the ending lines of book 3. This sort of also bleeds into Apollo considering the weight of life and his own heart, and the whole idea of him trying to change to make amends for his past behavior. I think by the end of this, we really might just have #1 Dad (and God) Apollo (I’m very hopeful).

Choice of Mortality: Heavily foreshadowed in book 2 (looking at you, cal), there’s going to be some crazy stuff in the coming books regarding this. We got a small glimpse of it near the end of book 3 when Apollo was questioning that, if given the option, would he go back to Olympus and abandon his friends in that moment? With circumstances debating, it’s really the heart of the plot and the series and I think we’ll see him questioning Olympus in general. The similarities between Zeus and Nero, and in turn, Apollo and Meg, are made incredibly clear in the series. Apollo would never let Meg return to Nero-it’s his goal to help her to free her from his influence and guide her through her trauma-and yet Apollo is in the same exact situation, the stakes are just, arguably, a lot less black and white. Meg will most definitely not return to Nero and overcome his manipulation, and in turn, I think it will inspire Apollo-making the choice harder than it already is.

There’s no doubt Apollo will ultimately return to Olympus, but that doesn’t made the ride any easier. While there’s no hope of Meg coming to terms with Nero (And I’m not saying there should be (please kill Nero)), Zeus is a problem that isn’t going to go away, and I hope that at the very least, Apollo can overcome his abusive relationship with his own father at the end, and maybe even revolutionize Olympus. It would make a great resolution to the series, and I think that’s what it’s pushing for and heading towards, the complete opposite of what the gods are doing now, and Apollo may just be the one to start it.

Misc predictions and wants:

>Meg and Apollo will HUG (godsdammit, even if I have to force them myself!) And for the love of the gods, can we please get a clear cut reference to their relationship regarding the SUN and PLANTS. LISTEN MAN,

>Someone else is going to die. If they don’t, they will come extremely close, and be saved by Apollo (solidifying his character development regarding the effects of his actions on others) in some intense true self sacrificial way that can’t be debated (i.e., Apollo’s excuses for being able to stabbing himself in the chest). And…the Styx is hungry.

>I have no idea what Annabeth’s up to in MC, but I’m hoping that she will make an appearance (and hopefully along with percy?). I’d also guess that camp jupiter and half-blood will come together again, but that’s just purely hoping (Don’t look at me like that, I have no idea what funk was in HoO).

>REUNION WITH ARTEMIS. PLEASE. FOR THE LOVE OF THE GODS.

>I really want more camp half blood life. I really, really, really do. We’re sure as hell not going to get it. But oh, what I wouldn’t do for Apollo’s extended stay at camp, or even just, camp in general for anyone. Please!

>Everyone is going to hate the shit out of Apollo for Jason’s death (arguably, they should be upset at Rick and not my stupid, stupid son…) and oh boy is he going to have a fun time with that. I initially thought that Apollo didn’t react nearly as strong to Jason’s death as he should have (was it just me or did he mourned Crest harder than Jason?? You could argue unreliable narrator, but come on), but oh boy, I think it may be because the worst is yet to come regarding that.

>Probably some shitty forced romance for Apollo. I do not want this. I really do not want this (does ANYONE want this???). But the arguments predicting this are pretty darn hard to refute, sadly. One can only pray.

At the end of the series I really want Apollo to be like “Fuck you guys, I’m the god of demigods now. Fuck you. Especially you Zeus. I’m protecting everyone in this bitch. You can’t stop me.” and proceed to aggressively aid demigods everywhere wearing the camp half-blood shirt. Also if he moved in to camp, I sure as hell would not complain. I also wouldn’t complain if he gave driving lessons to his kids in the sun chariot. Or if he made amends with everyone he’s ever hurt. Or if he kept aspects of Lester’s appearance (like those love handles) because hey, he doesn’t have to be insecure anymore and you know what, it’s cute dammit, abs are so out. Or…well, you get the idea I’m gonna stop myself there.

That was long (LIKE, FOUR FREAKING PAGES LONG) but I hope I answered your questions!

[babydollsmadd]

25, 23, 29, and 30 because i hate (love) you and want you to suffer 💖💖💖💕

EYYYY I’m finally getting around to finishing these lmao. (also I just noticed u changed ur profile picture???? I’m iN LOVE ❤️✨❤️)

WARNING this is super mega long!

I ended up writing a lot of these for all of my paras bc I can’t fucking stop myself n you’ve honestly heard enough of my mains and not enough of my others so I Had to I’m so sorry

this entire post ended up being such a mess and I’ve been working on it for weeks I’m so fucking sorry

send me emoji asks!

🏈 Does your para enjoy playing sport?

Zazie does actually enjoy playing sports quite a bit, just.. alone. He’s not a team player, and often doesn’t know his own strength, so it’s better to let him do things on his own. He used to do a lot of running & parkour, but nowadays he mostly just works out on his own. He still does gymnastics tho. Tatsu very much loves playing sports, be it soccer, football, whatever, he’s in. He likes team sports, but he’ll still go work out alone most of the time. With Nyru it’s a bit more complicated, bc on one hand she has to be in top form for her concerts, but on the other, she really hates sports and just moving in general. Usually Zazie motivates her n they end up working out together, but otherwise, she doesn’t like playing any sports. Nyro plays a lot of chess, that counts right? Otherwise, he & Nyra really don’t like sports either. Meg & Ao tho work out a ton and always look incredible, and especially Meg enjoys playing sports, even if she’s not the best. She’s also quite strong tho, so that’s nice. I think Rin would be into sports as well, he’s all about a healthy balance in his life. He spends so much time painting, that I feel like he’d take some time for physical activities as well. Daiki is a fucking nerd and hates sports as much as Nyru, a subject they like to rant about a lot. Suki probably isn’t into sports either, like at all. Ami.. yeah actually. She spends a lot of time with the more active in the group, especially her brother, so she’d be into team sports as well.

🌼 Describe the aesthetic of your para (can include visual)

OKAY u already know how much trouble I’m having with this one but. My first plan was to actually write them down, like, all those posts u always see, but I only really liked the one I wrote for Zazie, all the others I disliked. Now I’m going back to wanting to make boards, and I think that’d be really cool, but I just do not have the energy to make all of those first, so I’m putting this on my to do list and hopefully I’ll actually do that at some point lmao. Now I can finally post this beast. ✨

✍ Write headcanons/imagine about your para(s)

OKAY so uhh. With any other person I would just take some more points from my hella long list of fun facts about Zazie, but you know literally all of them. I think?? Yeah literally every single one of these I’ve told you about. So. Huh. What do I do now. We’re at a point where I can’t tell you shit about Zazie & Nyru bc you literally know everything. So let’s see if I can come up with some other facts about Tatsu on the spot bc he needs more love.

despite the fact that he’s been appearing a lot less in my daydreams, my heart still goes ❤️🚨❤️🚨❤️ when I think about Tatsu. 

i mean COME ON he’s amazing and he needs to come back I miss him!!!!!! I just feel like he’s been.. sorta withdrawn and depressed since he’s no longer with Nyra. That happened a while ago tho, idk maybe he’ll finally come back soon.

not sure if I ever told u this?? but he also doesn’t have a gag reflex. like at all. zero (0). 👀 for some reason he likes to bring this up in the most random moments too.

he’s actually fluent in 4 languages, at some point Zazie dragged him down the rabbit hole and they learned a bunch of languages together. these are English, Spanish, Japanese & German.

he has an incredible voice as well, obviously. it’s relatively high, but has this.. hmm I guess seductiveness about it? not sure how to explain it lmao. apart from Jay Kay & Brendon Urie, this song here is very close.

he can hit ridiculously high notes, on the same level as Nyru actually.

I told u this before, but his theme song is hey look ma, I made it due to how fucking perfect it is for him. he was very close with his birth mother, but she died shortly after his sister’s birth. his step mother was very abusive & made their life a living hell, and now, many years after they’ve gotten out of that situation, he still wishes he could show his real mother what has become of them.

he really didn’t deserve all of the bad shit that has happened him. sadly, he’s kind of a sheep, he just follows along with whatever’s happening. he’s not a bad person at all, he truly has a heart of gold, he just doesn’t have the strength to actually fight against anything. not really.

so in situations where he has to do bad things bc Zazie basically tells him to, he’ll do it, matter how much he hates it. man writing that out is actually heartbreaking damn.

he has a lot of regrets in his life, but the biggest one is probably his relationship with Nyra. he really did love her (still does tbh but don’t tell anyone), it’s just that he really fucked that up. and I don’t think he’ll ever be able to have a normal, healthy monogamous relationship the way Nyra wanted. so that’s heartbreaking as well. why did this turn into me talking about how fucking sad I am about Tatsu lmao ok we done here

🎙 Write a poem/song/or a story with song verses about your para or parascom

nshjfbkjdsbfkjds u know I hate poetry & I’m way too insecure about my writing so we’ll just uh… write down a fitting song verse for each of of my paras.

Zazie

I ain’t niceNo I’m quite a dickI’m the bad guy who’s makin’ you sickIt’s easy for meI’ve got no shameI’m in it for the money and fame

Nyru

But I got a mind to show my strengthAnd I got a right to speak my mindAnd I’m gonna pay for thisThey’re gonna burn me at the stakeBut I got a fire in my veinsI wasn’t made to fall in line

Tatsu

So I don’t feel loveBecause I got no faithI’ve seen those twisted lies thrown back into my faceI’ve heard the crazy doctrines of the human raceI must be alone

Daiki

Got an eagle beak with the ostrich feetSeven spider eyes for every day of the weekMeans I’m still up working while your bitch ass sleepsI’m an alien among the human beings

Nyra

Picture, picture, smile for the picturePose with your brother, won’t you be a good sister?Everyone thinks that we’re perfectPlease don’t let them look through the curtains

Nyro

Triangles are my favourite shapeThree points where two lines meetToe to toe, back to back, let’s goMy love, it’s very late‘Til morning comesLet’s tessellate…

Megumi

I just keep elevating, no losses, just upgradingMy lessons, made blessings, I turned that into moneyThank God I never settled, this view is so much betterI’m chilling, I’m winning, like on another level

Ami

Well you think that you know what I am but you don’t‘Cause I say what you can’t and I do what you won’tI like it loud really proud like a crown upon my headI’ll always be this way ‘till the day that I’m dead

Ao

Somehow, you’ve remained modestFlashbulbs pop, paparazzi goes wildWith amazing grace you walk and smileThey answer to your beck and callYou’re flawless

Rin

Prove to yourselfThere’s nobody elseRaise up your handAnd leave no man standing

Suki

I see how your attention buildsIt’s like looking in a mirrorYour touch like a happy pillBut still all we do is fearWhat could possibly happen next?Can we focus on the love?