#mentally i’ll reader

[will-of-dumpsterfire]

[moongreenlight]

Soap as serial killer!reader’s henchman and he’s just so fucking clueless. Reader yells and screams and makes him drag bodies into the trash whatever and when he talks to the guys about it he’s like “yeah she’s my girlfriend but she doesn’t know it yet she’s just a little high maintenance I have to figure out how to get her to relax for a second because any time I go into her office she threatens to kill me but sometimes I get lucky and she’ll put her hands around my neck and then yell at me more when I get a boner” 😍

[anintrovertedechoe]

no thoughts just breaking down in mammon’s arms and sitting in his lap while he rocks you back and forth and firmly rubs up and down your back while telling you he’s got you and it’s all going to be okay.

[starrylevi]

“Are you okay?” Levi asks you.

“No.”

“I know, you don’t look it. What’s wrong?”

“Everything is wrong, Levi. I’m exhausted…I wonder what it’s like to have a brain that functions the way it’s supposed to.”

His eyebrows furrow slightly. “Your brain is fine.”

“But that’s the thing, it’s not!” You say exasperatingly. “It’s wired differently and so it makes everything more difficult. I switch between three modes: Not wanting to exist, Surviving, and Beyond Surviving. Guess how much time I spend in each mode?”

Levi doesn’t say anything in response. His expression shows more concern than confusion this time.

“Fine, I’ll tell you. Most of my time is spent surviving. Some of my time is spent not wanting to exist. And just a little of my time is spent beyond suriving…what kind of life is that?”

Levi’s eyes look at you with sadness. “Not much of one, to be honest…but it’s yours and you only have one.” He counters.

“Well, I don’t even know if I want it half of the time. Y’know, someone told me that life is basically climbing mountains. You climb a mountain, which represents a challenge or obstacle, once you get to the top you enjoy the view for a moment…then you climb back down and do the same thing all over again. Rinse and repeat.”

Levi seems to identify with what you’re saying and he knows you’re frustrated right now but he needs to keep you from spiraling. He’s not letting you give up. That’s not the way. “It’s what we have to do, Y/N.” He says gently.

“And what if I don’t want to do anything? What if I don’t want to climb fucking mountains? What if I don’t want to constantly be challenged and given obstacles? What if I just want to sit at the top of the mountain and just be?”

Levi knows these feelings all too well…he’s wrestled with them a few times throughout his life but he’s continued to push through because that’s what you just do. And you’re going to do the same even if he has to do the pushing for you. You snap Levi out of his thoughts with your next statement.

“It would be so much easier if I just…”

“Stop.”

“But-“

“Stop.” He repeats sternly, his steel eyes boring into yours.

You grunt angrily. “You’re not even real, Levi!” You yell out at him. You’re not angry with him. You’re angry at the world, angry for the universe and your parents for putting you in this predicament, angry for placing you into a world that doesn’t accommodate you. “You are a 2-dimensional character I use to cope. There’s no way for you to actually soothe or help me. You. Are. Fictional.”

Your words don’t seem to phase him. He shrugs. “I’m real enough.”

“What does that even mean?”

“I’m real enough to you. Y/N. You are the one who brings me to life. You are the one who decides how real I should be. What does it matter if I’m not a real person?”

“It’s silly.”

“Who says it’s silly?”

“I don’t know, a bunch of people.”

“Well, fuck all of those people then. Just fuck them.” He states as if it’s obvious.

You sigh. “It doesn’t work that way, Levi…”

“So make it work that way. No one else is keeping you alive but yourself.”

“And you…” You say softly.

Levi shakes his head. “I don’t do anything. Like I said before, you’re the one who does the all the heavy lifting. I exist because you want me to. I function the way I do because you want me to.”

“So I control you?”

Levi rolls his eyes at that. “Don’t be a brat. What I’m saying is I’m just an outlet for you.”

You pause, thinking of his words. He’s not wrong. He’s just a character but he’s also not just a character because of you. “I wish you were real.” You admit sadly.

“I wish I were real too…for you.” He sighs as he runs a hand through his raven hair. “But it doesn’t matter if I’m real or not. I still occupy your brain. I still make you happy, that’s all that matters. As long as you let me live in your mind, I’m always going to be here for you.

You nod, not saying anything further.

“Okay?” He asks.

“Okay.”

“Good.”

[blueingsfairy]

as your local human! oc & human! reader lover : songs that make me think of human! reader and their relationships :

neteyam:

lo’ak

kiri

ao’nung

tsireya

rotxo

[chilapis]

ajax. ajax, ajax, ajax, ajax. you’ll never guess who i’m thinking about.

[bcyhoods]

i’ve never truly known what it feels like to be obsessed with a piece of media with a tiny fandom until now……………..

[house-of-slayterr]

Hannibal With Disabled S/O:

@myers-meadow-selfship

These are specific to story me, but they can apply to anybody who reads this 🥰

Frances was never the same after they fell off that roof. Their body never fully recovered and they were left with chronic pain. But their high pain tolerance makes them unaware of just how bad it is sometimes. Hannibal is frustrated at first because he thinks they’re trying to be brave, but they genuinely don’t know when they’ve pushed themselves too far until it’s too late.

If Hannibal saw their hands shaking while doing a task, he wouldn’t silent to walk over and remove whatever it was from their hand. If it was a book, he’d offer to read it to them, knowing how exhausted they were. If they were in the kitchen, he would finish whatever they were cooking. He tries to let them be Independent but the kitchen is his domain after all. If they were working on a project, he’d try to convince them to stop for the night. And if they said no, he would go as far as to physically remove them and take them to bed, or cuddle them on the couch so they can’t go back.

If they were having a bad leg day, he’d notice right away. Wether they were limping and trying to hide it, he has a keen eye. He’d subtly try to get them to sit. Now if they were in the house it’s different than in public. They would specifically try harder to appear able bodied in public. Hannibal probably keeps their cane on hand, even if they insist they didn’t need it. He always brings it just in case. But if they were in the house, he’d be a little less subtle when trying to get them to slow down and take care of themselves.

If they started the day by crawling around the house, he will not be amused. It’s kinda hard to miss someone crawling across your house, attempting to act normal. He stare at them over his book and see if they would ask for help first. But if it went on for too long, he’d be afraid they would bruise their knees. Cue him picking them up again.

“Hannibal I’m fine”

“Darling, you are aware you can ask for help, right?”

“What do you think I do when you aren’t home?”

This would stress the man out. He doesn’t see them as helpless, he knows their capable. But he’s always afraid they’ll get hurt because of their stubbornness. Her understand they want to be independent so he won’t always just step and and do stuff for them. Instead he’ll offer his assistance. Perhaps standing behind them in the kitchen as they cook, to make sure they don’t fall. Or sitting them down and handing them things they need so they don’t have to get up to get them.

Hannibal is they type to make sure they have the best mobility aids available. And would make them understand that they shouldn’t feel bad for using them. If they thought it was stupid to use them around the house, because they shouldn’t have to. He would encourage them to push past that thought. And if they were nervous about using them in public, he would glare at anyone who dared to stare or say anything. He’d think it’s adorable if they insist on decorating their aids. It would show they are more comfortable with using them.

Hannibal’s house is more than one floor. He’d probably give them a room on the bottom floor just to be safe. So they’d have an option on low energy days. But if his room was upstairs, he’d quickly realise that they would have to climb the stairs to greet him. Which is fine on good days, when they’re legs are working better or they only need their cane or crutches. He knows they’re capable and wouldn’t be overly worried about their skills.

But if it was a wheelchair day, and they tried to crawl up the stairs to get to his room, or office. He would panic. He would feel awful for not being down on the lower level with them. He’d probably inscrit they text him, he can answer text when he’s working from home. He would March down the stairs and scoop them up bridal style and bring them to wherever he was if they asked. He’d let them sit on his lap on his office, or under the desk if they wished. He just liked the closeness. And if it’s the middle of the night and they wanted to sleep on his room, he wouldn’t even be upset if they called his phone waking him up. He’d rather that then they crawl all the way up there, he’d feel terrible. If they’re sleeping downstairs, he will check on them throughout the night, or sneak into their bed if he’s in need of cuddles.

If their fainting issue was acting up, this man would be stressed as hell. Hannibal is good about keeping calm on the outside. But he can tell when they begin to feel more tired or sluggish, or if they start zoning out. If they were at dinner with everyone, and they began to feel faint. He would just calmly catch their head in his hand so they wouldn’t hit the table. After they woke, he would also if they wanted to continue the meal, or excuse themselves to go lay down.

If it’s a frequent pass out day, he’ll cancel his appointments and just hold them the whole day. He doesn’t want to risk them hitting their head on anything. This way he can also make sure they aren’t trying to push through their bodies natural reaction. Because he knows that’s not how to works, you can use will power to suddenly force oxygen back into your brain. And he would remind them of such.

If they’re about to pass out when standing, he will cross the room so quickly to catch them. He would beat himself up if he was ever not fast enough. So on days he notices they’re a little off, he sticks closer just in case. He’d worry on the days they’re out of the house, or hanging out with William. He wouldn’t know if the man would be observant enough to read their tells. He would be angry if they got hurt when out with Will.

William is better about the physical aspect of their illness. He will give them a piggy back ride if their legs begin to hurt while they’re out. If they’re in the house, he’ll sit them down with the dogs, to distract them from their pain. William is more in tune with them than Hannibal gives credit for. Sometimes they might feel a little smothered with Hannibal, but they know its just because he cares. But Will makes them feel more laid back about their chronic illness and disabilities.

Will is very touch averse, but he will hold them if they’ve passed out, so that they won’t be alone when they wake up. Or if it was a high pain day, he’d let them lean on him.

On the mental health aspect, Hannibal is obviously better at it. It’s quite literally his job, and as questionable as he is with some of his patients, he doesn’t care about them. Let alone love them. I’m depression days, he’d help them do simple tasks, like brush their hair, brush their teeth, or help them to bath. He’d make them something easy, and not daunting to eat, just so they have something in their stomach.

On anxiety days, he’d let them be clingy. Secretly these are his favorite days, because he gets to hold them close. With no fuss whatsoever from them. He’d be the best equipped to handle panic attacks or meltdowns. He takes their autism very seriously. He’s memorised their likes and dislikes, and will try not to keep anything that would cause sensory overload in the house.

We’ve already discussed that some of his suits aren’t exactly the most friendly of textures and fabrics. But Hannibal has taste, that’s not something he’d be willing to give up. But he’s learned to not take it personally if they avoid him when he’s wearing wool. He’ll take his suits off when he gets home and switch into a soft sweater so that he can get hugs from them. He also buys William soft sweaters so he doesn’t accidentally send them into a meltdown.

He’ll keep ear plugs and headphones with him at all times, and just casually hand them to them if he sees them become more fidgety and aggravated. He made a playlist of all his favorite classical music to calm them down. And it’s very effective. If he notices their biting habit, he’ll keep gum on him as well, and get them one of those necklaces that’s safe to chew on. He wouldn’t want them biting themselves. Autistic people are more prone to self harm, so he tries to be very cautious about objects that could hurt them.

He can and will restrain them during a meltdown so they can’t hurt themselves. He doesn’t really care how much they struggle or cry, he’ll do his best to calm them down. He’ll give deep pressure therapy if needed, and just lay on top of them. He’s the type of man to rather have them hit him, then themselves. As well as with the biting thing, if they really can’t stop the urge, he’ll allow them to nibble on his fingers. Only if it’s in the house though, never in public.

He always encourages stimming, no matter where they are. But if they are at a fancier event, he’ll escort them to a private room so they could stim in peace. Not because he’s embarrassed, but because he knows people can be judgmental. And a round of questions could cause a meltdown. He adores their happy stims, and could watch them for hours. If they’re executed about something, he’ll let them talk until they run themselves dry. Then pull them to his chest for a well deserved nap after. He finds it funny how sleepy they can get.

He will buy things involving their special interests or hyperfixations, just to see them happy. There’s nothing better in the world to him than the moment their face lights up. But again, he is stern and cares for their health. If a hyperfixation is stopping them from taking care of themselves, he will take it away from them. It tough love, but he needs them to be healthy. If they won’t sleep, he’ll make them a midnight snack and some tea, and talk to them until they tire themselves out.

Hannibal doesn’t have all the answers, but he does learn from his mistakes. He probably has an entire file on them so he’ll never forget anything he deems important. It’s a little obsessive, but he’s trying his best.

[kneesprain2]

This was on a pinterest board called exotic guys

dude .

[farfromstrange]

Small update for anyone who cares…

First of all, thank you to everyone who’s supported me after I posted about the current state of my mental health! The past couple of days were shitty, but I made it through the worst.

The exam that kept me on the edge of depression and insanity while at the same time robbing me of writing inspiration is finally done. Got myself some sweets and a nice iced coffee and I’m now watching The Walking Dead. Did it go well? Probably not but I’m too exhausted to care. I deserve a treat after studying like crazy. My mental health deserves a reward. Time for a much needed night in my bed with Disney+ by my side.

I’m feeling better now, thankfully, so I will start easing my way back into writing and creating content for you. I feel less sad and frustrated when I open Tumblr now and I’ve actually continued writing the new Foreigner’s God chapter as well as trying to write an essay on Matt Murdock’s characters (I did that to revise for the psychology exam and I think it worked quite well).

I’ll be queueing some drafts until I’ve got everything in my life sorted and am ready to be completely back. Thank you for your support and your patience! Your lovely words made my days so much better and the amount of love I’ve received is unreal. I love you all so much!

I didn’t get the time to answer your replies to the original post separately, so to everyone who’s told me to take care of myself and showed me love in one way or another, THANK YOU! I can’t express how thankful I am for you and how much I love and cherish all of you! I know it might not have seemed like it in the past couple of days, but it IS true.

The worst is yet to come, but for now I think I’m okay and somewhat ready to come back. The break did me some good and I’ve realized I shouldn’t put too much pressure on myself because hobbies are not supposed to feel like chores, so I’ll take it easy from now on so I can actually enjoy creating new Daredevil content again <3

Love you all!

- Lizzi.

[will-of-dumpsterfire]

[crybaby-bkg]

I finally parted ways w my old therapist of almost two years to find someone new and after having to hound him for two weeks to get my documentation from him, I’m just now finding out that I have panic disorder like. wow. fucking news to me ig

[asimplearchivist]

sometimes the only way someone can physically mentally and/or emotionally stand to be kind to themselves is to romanticize themselves in prose

[xxcreative-usernamexx]

insert witty caption

[grilledcheeseandguavajelly]

on a completely unrelated note, i miss writing fics (maybe just a little bit 🤏🏼). i wish i would’ve kept my fics somewhere instead of just deleting everything when i was going Through Something™️… i just wanted to ramble!! mwah 😚

I MISS READING YOUR FICS 😩😩😩

I literally saw this and was like “NEVER FEAR!! I reblogged your masterlist and will save the day!!” and I 100% did not realize that the post is there but the links are not. So now I’m really sad. And maybe I cried a little. But it’s okay!!

You’re an incredible writer and if you want to repost them or write more or never write again, I’ll support you in anything you do! I’m just here, pining for your fic and sending you all of my love and support!! Miss you, bestie!! 😚😚

[erixyin]

Me for the past two months: oh my god I’ve gotta finish writing the eddie x reader x Billy thing or everyone’s gonna hate it and leave

Me literally an hour ago: ok I’m gonna write a little bit because I think I know what I’m doing now

Also me: *has a complete mental breakdown*