#moments where my url feels very fitting

[draculagerard]

I hate the tiktokification of Spotify but this is so fucking funny. Ah yes my three genres, punk emo and. vampire.

[lover-of-mine]

hi yes you aren't just a gifmaker to me. ive listened to take my hand because of you! question: what are your fav buddiecoded 5sos songs? i wanna listen to them and develop a new band obsession

I'm happy you've listened to take my hand because of my edits!!!!! I've been preparing my whole life for this question mspaksoakaokapakaoa

I'm actually gonna start this list with a 5sos adjacent song, the lead singer, Luke Hemmings, he has a solo album (incredible album, it's called when facing the things we turn away from, maybe check it out if you feel like it) but he has a song called slip away that I can't hear without thinking about buddie, I even made a video (you can watch it here if you want).

Invisible is the most pre 118 Buck song ever and I take no criticism about that. That one has a set because I didn't feel emotionally stable enough to make the video lol. And TEARS! is very Eddie coded (here's the video lol). High is also really Buck coded. (Edit)

I like making castaway, if you don't know and moodswings about the cemetery and the lawsuit, the moments where we question how we can keep watching buddie breakup if they're not even together. If you don't know is not available in the us tho, so if you're from there you may not be able to hear it. I like picturing established buddie to disconnected so that's another one. I also have video edits of caramel, and lover of mine, those are a bit about me really liking the song (lover of mine is why my url is what it is lol) and forcing it to fit but they are really good songs.

Some blanket recommendations that I take out of context to fit them are: ghost of you, talk fast, close as strangers, story of another us, you don't go to parties (there's a line about a couch lol) and lonely heart. And I am legally required to recommend jet black heart to anyone asking about 5sos. And outerspace/carry on. And my personal favorite 5sos songs are airplanes, red line and wrapped around your finger (I am writing a whole buddie fic based on wrapped so maybe you can make it about them kspakapakap)

And I have a tag for 5sos inspired edits. I'm pretty sure all the songs I've used in an edit before are here tho. (I went to check and that's a lie: other songs I have used for 911 are: emotions (this one is very Eddie coded), bad omens (highkey one of the best 5sos songs), kill my time, not in the same way, vapor, tomorrow never dies, thin white lies, take what you want and bleach, but these are mostly out of context lines I think would fit them)

[iuwon]

ok i ran out of things to say already I DONT SPAM ASK BOXES OFTEN so i’ll give u a moot game to do 😁😁 this is unoriginal but assign ur mutuals tropes so we can bring a little deluluism from twitter to tumblr

AUHHHH A MOOT GAME😍 this is so sexy of u i love ur brain SAWRY IM GONNA TAKE A WHILE TO ANSWER THIS

@jaeyunverse — you know that trope where the kpop idol goes undercover on twitter, so like undercover kpop idol x fan. YEAH, like whenever i see those tropes i just can’t see anyone who’d suit the role better than you i’m being so serious, like your personality radiates this vibe that makes a person want to get to know you more. i can envision a whole smau and you’d make the whole thing SO FUN i’ll be the side internet best friend who comments under ur every tweet

@tyunni — IDK IF THIS IS A TROPE but you know the plot wherein they’re oblivious to the fact that they’re in love with each other so their whole story is just their own friends trying to give them signs that the other likes them, and then both of their friends teaming up until they’re in the brink of just straight up telling them bc you guys are not getting the hint IT’D BE SO CUTE AND FUNNY GIGGLES

@yjwfav — THE PREVIOUS BULLY TURNED INTRO NICE DUDE TROPE. like don’t get me wrong, they wouldn’t actually be a bully, just someone who was misunderstood. this is so random but i would do anything just to see that trope with nadia😁 the conflict and confusion and misunderstandings i feel like slow burn really fits you SO SO SO WELL like do u guys see it cause i see it so clearly THIS TROPE JUST FITS YOU SO WELL IM SORRY

@fairybinie — THE FAKE RELATIONSHIP TROPE WAS MADE FOR U SHUT UP the slow burn and tension and hints and everything like i can envision this already and having u talk to me about it on twt dms and my hand would be over my mouth and all I DON’T EVEN NEED TO EXPLAIN MYSELF

@s-uwu-binie — THE BEST FRIENDS TO LOVERS TROPE WOULD BE SO SO SO CUTE ON YOU MY ASAWA😭 or like the whole aspect of first love and🥺 it would be so wholesome and fluffy like having a best friend and a lover at the same time THIS WOULD BE SO PERFECT YOU DONT UNDERSTAND

@iyeonjuni — honestly the only trope i can really see on you is the love triangle trope LMSSMDNDNXD I DON’T KNOW HOW TO EXPLAIN IT just two people pining after you 😍😍 OR MORE we Never know but i really see that on you, i also see like one of them being someone from the past and then comes back as the one who got away, so you’re stuck in between choosing. i just cannot explain why .

@enhayos — I DO NOT KNOW WHY BUT I REALLY REALLYYY NEEDED TO PUT THIS: the trope wherein the both of you have changed and your relationship is on the edge so you’re just trying to find your way back to each other. GRRRRHHHHH THIS IS THE PERFECT TROPE FOR YOU ???? I’M SORRY IF IM WRONG BUT I JUST SEE THIS HAPPENING IF EVER

@junityy — the seat mates trope. I LOVE IT SM just hear me out and imagine this: seatmates. always paired up with each other. LIKE THEY COULD BE LOUD AF OR WAYYY TOO QUIET OR WHTVR BUT THIS WOULD BE SO SO SO CUTE UEUEUEUEUE😭😭 like them having this very obvious liking towards u and like to them everything is about you so like they’d notice all the little things about you and pick up your little habits or moods ok ill stop

@yyx2 — the enemies to lovers trope, honestly. this would be so sexy. like i wouldn’t say that you guys would be enemies but you guys wouldn’t exactly like each other and would disagree w/ each other a lot. you guys would be in the fine line between liking and disliking e/o it’d be so juicy HAUSHSHSBDH

@yeoforce — roommates to lovers but you guys are rivals that’s the spiciest trope so far. the tension, the awkward moments, the questionable moments I’D BE SO FUN AND SPICY i’m already envisioning scenarios I WONT EXPLAIN INTO DETAIL BC U DONT OPEN TUMBLR ANW

@ksjluvrbot — new url i lov it anw ur trope would be the amnesia trope like u forgot about your s/o and the memories so it’s a whole slow burn I FEEL LIKE IT SUITS U fr you’d be so skeptical of them at first and definitely avoidant because ur like WHO TF IS THIS DUDE GET HIM AWAY, but they’re very persistent towards you so you slowly get to notice all the little things they do yadayda I WON’T GO INTO DETAIL EITHER BC U DON’T ALSO OPEN TUMBLR

me when i don’t know who else to add i’m just tagging people off the top of my head I’M SORRY IF I DIDN’T ADD YOU😭

[lavendelhummel]

Tag-Game-Time!

Ok, I have never done any of these. But it is time. Because @lilolilyr tagged me in so many of these fun games and every time I think they are fun... maybe I'll do it? And then I didn't dare.

But still Thank you so much for every tag! I appreciated every single one so, so much!! Thank you!

So the one that caught me in a moment, where not only I am feeling brave but also have some time (*gasp*), is of course a super duper hard one (pun intended, because I wont be able to include Abba, but disclaimer, I love Abba). Let's do this:

URL-Songs: Rules: Pick a song for every letter of your url and tag that many people. Let's be honest, this is impossible. I am incredibly indecisive and am that person with the weird music taste. I have absolutely no idea about fresh new songs. And I am indecisive, I wont make it with just one. Can I do three per letter?

L - ok, See here it starts, I found 126 songs starting with the letter L on my playlist. This game is cruel for French music! How should I pick one?? Closing my eyes... La mer est calme. This one calms me down instantly, I have used it to fall asleep (usually dont use music but earplugs for that) when I had headaches. It's just very calming. Also did I mention that I love the sea? Yes? Ok, so I will stay with that theme for this letter, there is also Le chant des sirènes and Land of opportunity ("I'm sailing away..." so yes fits with the ocean ones and yes there would be more "la chanson de la mer" etc. but I have to leave it at this I think)

A - only found 11 songs with A! Yay, an easier decision! I'll go with Antarctica, A white demon love song (because vampires. yes, this is the twilight soundtrack), and April come she will (not including "Andante" because I already mentioned that I love Abba, but I want to mention how gay I felt when Lily James was singing that one in Mamma Mia 2. Also not mentioning either of the "Autumn leaves" songs, because one is actually a poem that I love mostly for the lyrics and the other one is nice but not a fav)

V - time for... Vampire! I will also include Viva la Vida for @lilolilyr because we sang it together and it's a great song. And to bring it to three, there is also Voler de nuit because I can't not include Calogero. In total there were 8 songs starting with the letter V in my playlist.

E - Elle a les yeux revolver, Elle me dit (MIKA!! and yes, the orchestra version) and Expectations (yes, Juno soundtrack) by Belle and Sebastian (which is funny because I have to pull myself together not to add the whole soundtrack of a film called Belle et Sébastien).

N - This is hard! There are only 15 songs with that letter but it's hard! But maybe I should switch languages for a change? I listen to very, very few German songs but the Wise Guys are great. I was late to the party and discovered them at the last concert they gave before splitting up but here is Nur für dich. I also like N’importe quoi and Ne m'appelle pas. Honorably gay mention: Not worth hiding and No place in heaven (ne me qu---quuu-quiiiiiiii----tte pas ma chère letter N! there are so many songs starting with you... ok, ok I am cheating. But this game is hard!)

D - I think I am giving up at trying to stay in line. I have already missed one opening for a song for my very favorite album of all times, so here is Dans les Prisons de Nantes. I also haven't included the Dubliners yet so here is Dirty old Town. I also love Dead Flowers and haven't mentioned Coeur de Pirate yet. For the Germans on here, Deutsche Bahn is a must-know. We all know why. Also haven't mentioned Grand Corps malade so here is Dimanche soir. Nooooo, don't stop me now, there is so many more with the letter D! Ok I am cheating again but help, this is hard!!

E - Elle me manque déjà, Eblouie par la nuit and En chantant (yep, going for that soundtrack version by Louane. It's just very cute)

L - L! The hardest letter again! Looks like my Liability is decision making! If only I could put Lucky Number Nine (9) songs for each letter! Let's get lost in music together!

H - I have to admit that I am a Christmas Grinch. And yet. Here is Happy X-mas, the war is over by John Lennon. I love that song and will never forget how my very musical educated sister sang along to it, suddenly asking "what means 'fear'?" when she was little. It's one of the best Christmas memories I have. I can't say that it's my favorite Christmas song, because those are all classical and in a good part in latin, but it always makes me feel better. There is also Happy Together, which I will always associate with the film Imagine Me And You and therefor love. Aaaand, I don't know, 20 more, so let's just randomly pick Hexagone.

U - Un été française, Un jour au mauvais endroit and Under my thumb (to get the Scott Pilgrim soundtrack in here)? Decisions are hard. Why am I doing this to myself?

M - My alltime favorite song is Ma Bretagne quand Elle pleut. It's silly but it answers the longing in my heart that only the rain in Brittany can and I love the personification and the love in that song. Since it's the same album - though a different language is Mna Na H-Eireann, so I am not counting it extra. This now makes me think of Mermaids (wow such a new, popular song) and Mr. Blue Sky.

M - Mr. Big Stuff, Ma liberté de penser, and Mon Amant de St Jean/Mitternachsnacht bei IKEA orrrr one of the 30 others on the list.

E - Eugene, I feel like this is a good place to add a gay-mention: Everyone is gay. It might be silly but I did take comfort in it when I was figuring things out of for the first time. And this is The End of the Line, I suppose.

L - Not quite the end, there is still Le Portrait, Les Tzars and I'll just Leave out all the Rest. Just one more for @lilolilyr because I had an earworm from this when we met and couldn't properly sing it to you to show you so- L'effect papillon. There is so many more but here is the Last Party and I'll stop.

Ok, now I still have to tag people. I still don't know that many, I'll never make it to 13 but to get close I'll just tag everyone I've ever talked to on here (and not felt bad about it later, cause not all messages were positive experiences ;)). So @ginnyjyng (your name here is still confusing! But have fun with the music <3), @trollocks-in-my-bollocks, @lakeofsilverpike, @onaperduamedee, @witchingshcdows, @thatordinaryoddity and @masterpieceofunderstatement have fun with this game, if you want. And if anyone else sees this and wants to participate, I am just to shy to tag anyone whom I haven't talked to but am still curious about your music taste, so go for it!

[haberdashing]

Indie Music Rec: Carsie Blanton

I wanted to promote an independent musician I'm a fan of, so here's a music rec post!

tl;dr:

Music: Folk, country, punk, maybe pop with some songs if you squint? Some love songs, some protest songs. Tempo varies wildly based on song. Definitely catchy. Some are sing alongs.

Vibes: Leftist, anti-capitalist, clearly channels her rage at the system into much of her music. Funny. Genuine. Passionate. She might just be on tumblr now actually it looks like the url is taken and probably actually by her but not used since 2018

Identity: From the American South, Jewish, Millennial-ish. Doesn't really center her own identity or story in most of her music.

Carsie Blanton... where do I even start in recommending her?

There's how she's about as far left as my own corner of tumblr tends to be. (I swear I heard her describe herself as politically "somewhere between Bernie Sanders and Karl Marx" but now I can't find the quote. It sounds about right, though.) How she refers to herself as "socialist" unabashedly and rails against the excesses of capitalism. How one of her songs has the lyric "you're just a Democrat, I'm a revolutionary".

How she has a song inspired by her response to the Charlottesville rally, and how the rally hit home for her, as she grew up in central Virginia as one of the only Jewish kids around.

How her songs channel her leftist rage, advocate protest, tear apart the system we're living in.

But importantly, she's not just writing protest songs, she's writing catchy protest songs that are genuinely quality pieces of music to boot.

When I saw her in concert a couple months ago, she mentioned how Dolly Parton's "9 to 5" is great because it's about as far left as you can get while still being a catchy pop song, and I think Carsie Blanton's own music fits that pretty well too.

I posted not too long ago about how my mom saw her posting something pro-Palestine and thought she was going too far because of it. I looked up the post in question; it had the caption "Free Palestine" along with some informative text that wouldn't look out of place in a tumblr post. Nothing radical, nothing anti-Israel. Just support for the Palestinian people. And while that might cost her some fans in and of itself--I think my mom's lost some interest in her because of it--I think it's a good example of how her leftism isn't just an act, or deployed just when it's popular. She speaks out for what's right, regardless of what the rest of the world thinks.

Now, that's enough of an introduction, I think. So I'll leave you with some examples of her music, and a quick blurb about each song I'm linking.

This is the one in response to Charlottesville, and it's the sort of fast-paced, angry song you might expect:

This one's also very anti-capitalist but a bit slower and more mellow, though that's not to say it won't get stuck in your head fast:

This is the one that first got her on my parents' radar, a fitting tribute to beloved country artist John Prine:

Apparently this one's big on Tiktok? I believe it, it's got the fast pacing and witty lyrics for that crowd. (Age-restricted because it uses the word "bitch" a lot, I imagine. Title is "Ugly Nasty Commie Bitch".)

This is the one with the lyrics I quoted above, despite being not generally a political song, just a fun silly listen:

Not quite as upbeat as the title might make it seem, but very fitting vibe for the current moment given, y'know, everything:

Are you an American with deeply divided feelings about what that means given your place of privilege in the world but being stuck in a system that keeps causing harm? Carsie Blanton feels that too:

Another slower, mellow one, and not political this time, but this one's gotten stuck in my head a few times lately:

And finally, a sing-along that seems like the perfect way to wrap things up:

[dancerladyaqua]

Alear, Marth and Azura for the character asks?

Gets long, so under the read more~

Alear:

First impression: "These leaks cannot be real what the hell"

Impression now: MY SAD WET CAT. I WILL PROTECT HIM. Absolutely one of my favorite lords in the series.

Favorite moment: There are so many to choose from... I think I'll talk about Lumera's second death. I talked about it a lot here, but that scene is really where (esp. in the Japanese) Alear coalesces their mostly forgotten past with their present.

Idea for a story: Too many that I haven't finished and anything else I can think of is all Marlear content.

Unpopular opinion: Alear is great apparently

Favorite relationship: Marlear, they are so cute and supportive of each other. Of romanceable options, Alfred--he's Alear's first friend!

Favorite headcanon: Naps very often but occasionally gets annoyed with that. They don't like to feel like they're missing anything.

Marth:

First impression: Fun Smash Bros dude

Impression now: Gorgeous Smash Bros dude (jk, he's also kind and fair and just and what a good lord, very fitting for the first one/face of the franchise)

Favorite moment: I won't lie, I'm most familiar with his Engage form and FEH in recent memory so. Hmmm. We'll say his summoning by Alear.

Idea for a story: Emblem Marth coming to terms with being his own existence.

Unpopular opinion: I don't know what's popular and unpopular anymore :c Idk man he's pretty

Favorite relationship: Marlear. He and Caeda are cute as well.

Favorite headcanon: Emblem Marth has lots of difficulties with being essentially a copy of someone who existed millennia ago, much less someone not from Elyos. He hides it well but eventually reveals it to Alear.

Azura:

First impression: My current url is from when her name was first revealed so yes, I have always loved her.

Impression now: So beautiful and kind and also, I have a type when it comes to FE ladies (blue and mysterious).

Favorite moment: Nohr outfit dance... It did something to me.

Idea for a story: Emblem Azura being the Emblem of Revelation

Unpopular opinion: Like I said idk what's popular/unpopular anymore. Azura perfect I guess

Favorite relationship: Azura x m!Corrin (specifically)

Favorite headcanon: Sings Shigure to sleep every night...

[seasideselfships]

Howdy Maverick! I read your Carrd and it seems we've got a lot of things in common like a love for space (and maybe the ocean??? I love your url name and also your names!!) and a couple of f/os who share the same media, so please know I'd be so thrilled to have you in my Ask box and talk about them if you'd like!

Some I noticed were your T//V//D f/os and Avengers f/os-- it makes me so happy to know you also do domestic ave.ngers please I'd love our s/is to be friends (maybe Max is able to learn some things from Xiomara and also vice versa? Whiplash went to Xavier's since she's a mutant--- did Syntax? Maybe they met there and could be assigned together? Idk but it's all fun to me!) for both media tell me all about yours anytime ;----;

Anyway, I wanted to also send these asks for different f/os and invite you to gush or talk about any of them in my Ask box too! (Also i love the different FOB lyrics i found looking through your Carrd, they're my favorite band!!!)

👍The Good Part👍 ~ What moment made you realize that you had to be with your F/O? For the Lo.st Bo.ys! (Love that your s/i is from key west btw I LOVE key west it's the only good place in Florida besides the space Center/LH)

🌃Chelsea Streets🌃 ~ If you could go anywhere, where would you and your F/O wanna vacation at? How would it go? With the Johnathan & the rest of the Byers fam + Hopper? Like a big family trip?

🎶Overture🎶 ~ Tell us a few of your favorite/most important memories involving your F/O! With Stefan?

Moxie @tex-treasures

Again, my ask box is always open so please feel free to stop on by anytime!✨💜

Howdy Moxie!! You guess correctly, I do have an odd fascination with the ocean, hence the 'seasideselfships' user!! Great observation!  Domestic av.engers is 10/10 my comfort ship, to go back to when I need Soft Vibes. It's so fun to be a big ol found family!! As far as s/is, I would love for them to be friends, please-

Max and Xiomara would be such fun friends! I read a little of your s/i write-up, and I feel they'd get along swimmingly! They'd definitely have a bit to learn from each other, and I think they'd have fun teaching each other, maybe over tea!  And as far as Syntax, I play fast and loose with her story, so it wouldn't be much to move her to Xavier's!! She's been my ma.rvel and all related stuff s/i for ages and I kind of edit her backstory to fit her where I fit her. Would be very fitting though to add Xavier's to her timeline since I went back + rewatched the first couple movies + got Major Sibling Vibes from Charles - And yes FOB!!! There's mainly fob, a few p! ones and one or two mcr ones, bc I haven't grown out of my emo phase and I still love all that music, but I vibe super heavy with FOB so they got the honor of being most of my tags-

Now that I have successfully rambled a mile of stuff, on to answer questions! 👍The Good Part👍 ~ What moment made you realize that you had to be with your F/O?  For the Lo.st Bo.ys!  - I think the defining moment would be one night on the boardwalk, the boys stood up for Marina. As someone who had to hide what she was from her friends on shore in Key West, she was always afraid that revealing who she was would scare people away. And even knowing the boys weren't human, she was still wary. You never know how people will react. But one night she was alone before they got to the boardwalk, and they found her getting harassed by some ner-do-wells and scared them off. That was proof to Marina that they cared. 

🌃Chelsea Streets🌃 ~ If you could go anywhere, where would you and your F/O wanna vacation at? How would it go? With the Johnathan & the rest of the Byers fam + Hopper? Like a big family trip? Byers Hopper clan road trip? Oh boy. We'd probably embark on a massive camping trip, I wanna say north Michigan. Considering I'm familiar, it'd be super fun. Platte River Campground. I've got no clue if it was around in the 80s, but that's a great place for the fam to camp + see all the sights north Michigan has to offer, like porcupine mountain, the lake in the sky, and of course the bridge. 

🎶Overture🎶 ~ Tell us a few of your favorite/most important memories involving your F/O! With Stefan? OH boy... Even if it had alterior motives, the Mi.kaelson Ball! It was so fun. Getting dressed up, fancy party style. Dancing with Stefan, swoon.  A funnier memory is Stefan giving her the "I'm a vampire" speech and Max laughing and telling him she had a feeling, which leads to a conversation about her abilities. 

@tex-treasures thanks for the ask!!!!

[o-avosetta]

The Lost Wardens music

I do not write songfics, nor do I purposely assemble "soundtracks" for my fics. But when I write, there is this weird whirlpool of serendipity, coincidence, and/or magic involving the music I listen to. Sometimes there are themes I'm working on in the story that pop up in a new song that gets released that week. Sometimes I hear a song, and I think, What this song is making me feel about love/loss/potential/my characters making out/etc. is what I want to feel in the story. This is the collection of what that whirlpool has pulled in.

Joanna Newsom doesn't like Spotify, so the vocal tracks are in a YouTube playlist. The mostly instrumental albums are linked separately. Delete Tumblr's pesky href-dot-li from the URLs as necessary. After the jump: personal/author-y playlist notes for myself; not required reading.

🌊 The Osprey (main playlist; 17 songs)

🌊 Instrumental/atmospheric albums:

Windswept Adan - Ichiko Aoba

Invisible Island - Midori Hirano

Minor Planet - Midori Hirano

Broken Circle - scntfc

If The Lost Wardens had a score, it would sound like the above. Windswept Adan captures a lot of the joy that Alex finds in magic, while Midori Hirano's darker work makes me think of Jonathan and his secrets, or Alex waking up in the middle of the night after a troubling dream.

🌊 Fall of the High School Star Running Back - The Mountain Goats

This song appears twice on the playlist: first with the original, and towards the end with a cover by Loamlands. Alex does not share William's fate, thankfully, but I thought the fallen star athlete theme struck a chord given Alex's insecurity about his future.

🌊 Carry This Picture - Dashboard Confessional

Lovestruck youth, nautical motifs, mention of working-class dads.

🌊 Porcelain - Ichiko Aoba

Just a sample off Windswept Adan for the playlist. Video is full of ocean magic.

🌊 The World We Built - The Wild Reeds

At the end of Chapter 6, I mentioned that this song had sort of become the theme song of the fic, "from several characters' points of view, at different points in time." It's mostly the old wardens. Sometimes, the suitcase lines make me think of Jonathan. Sometimes, they make me think of Leslie, waiting.

🌊 Redwood Tree - Jamie Drake

Flower Dance vibes, lanky young Cathy in the woods vibes.

🌊 This Town - Trixie Mattel (feat. Shakey Graves)

I grew up in a town where half the kids in my school left for bigger cities and half ended up at Big-Company-without-whose-presence-the-town-economy-would-collapse. It's one of the reasons Stardew Valley's own themes speak to me in the first place, and it's definitely the reason this song ended up on this list after it was released.

🌊 Ozean - Annenmaykantereit

@flowerandthesongstress recommended me this song, and I loved it. After looking up a translation, I decided it was for Chapter 16 Jonathan. I tear up just listening to it sometimes.

🌊 I Think We're Alone Now - The Wild Reeds (Tiffany cover)

There's a parenthetical memory in Chapter 8 where Alex remembers jumping into the lake with Leslie while a party is going on at Sebastian's house. It's a scene that hasn't been written, only imagined; I imagine it's one of those early moments Alex realized he was falling for the new farmer.

But also, the themes of escape and secrecy ("Children, behave") fit with the feeling of relationship obstacles set by a previous generation.

🌊 Training Montage - The Mountain Goats

One of those neat coincidences: this song came out while I was working on the Zuzu City / training camp chapters, which were themselves meant to show time passing while Alex was away from Pelican Town.

🌊 Video Games - Trixie Mattel (Lana Del Rey cover)

Journey of the Prairie King vibes, lazy romantic vibes.

I also deleted a scene where Alex and Sebastian talked about video games (Sebastian building one, Alex having played very little). Might add it back if it ever fits.

🌊 Divers - Joanna Newsom

I'll hunt the pearl of death to the bottom of my life.

Very ocean, much deep. Men going off to / into the sea, women waiting on the shore.

You don't know my name, but I know yours.

🌊 Watermelon Sugar - Harry Styles

Look, just because I don't write smut doesn't mean my characters aren't horny.

🌊 Capelton Hill - Stars

If we treat this playlist as a soundtrack to the fic, then this song starts a sequence we'll call "too many options for end-credits songs". By itself, I thought Capelton Hill was a nice reflection on having a place where you can go back to the past, for a while.

🌊 Fall of the High School Star Running Back - Loamlands (Mountain Goats cover)

See above.

🌊 Good Intentions Paving Company - Joanna Newsom

A song about being on the road with someone you're afraid to admit you're falling in love with, and eventually going home.

🌊 Spectacular Views - Rilo Kiley

Screaming for happiness from some ocean cliffs.

🌊 Time, As a Symptom - Joanna Newsom

Joanna has a talent for songs that sound like incantations. I felt this one with the nature imagery and the themes of birth, death, and rebirth was a great way to close out this playlist for my little fic about magic.

[finelinegynandromorph]

i was doing reading for class today and im scream !!!!!! tbh i did not exactly know what gynandromorph meant in your url but figured it has something to do with some sort of sex/gender presentation thing and was like ok yes can get behind this BUT HELLO THIS IS WHAT IT MEANS??? a kind of mosaic 🥺🥺 pls 🥺🥺

fine line gynandromorph…… 🥺🥺🥺 the best url 🥲

hi hi hi i was so very excited to receive this ask emmett!! ❤️ ty for thinking of me!!

yes! this is gynandromorphism!!! back when fine line was released in 2019 and i was doing a ~lot~ of self-reflection i was struggling a fair amount with the way that gender and sex were taught in some of the courses i was in (fortunately i also ended up taking some fantastic seminars that focused on comparative gender and sexuality that were really expansive and formative for me! but yeah not all classes were like that) and in response i started collecting little examples of non-conforming gender and sex in non-human animals and plants and fungi because they felt like little happy reminders that the rigid binaries so often presented as "biological" really are just human social oversimplifications of the wonderful and diverse world that is gender!

gynandromorphs were one of these little sunny gender moments and they really lodged themselves into a space in my chest that i don't think i fully understood then (or even now honestly)! it presents in various ways but one that really struck me was bilateral gynandromorphism, where you have a half-half of phenotypes (which reminds me of this trend you sometimes see in drag circles too, here's an example below from s7 of rpdr lol) that is just so striking and fun!

a few different eastern tiger swallowtail gynandromorphs!

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gorgeous lobster! (this is going in sage lobster tag)

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katya and violet in bilaterally gynandromorphic (?) outfits (w the caveat that these aren't phenotypes, they're forms of presentation, but it still sort of fits to me)

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anyway even though i think my own gender isn't neatly split down some midline i think it's such a beautiful representation of the complexities of presentation and how there's so much expansive beauty out there! and all this was occurring in the context of me listening to fine line on repeat and grappling with my own gender feelings and i always felt this little draw to h's butterfly tattoo and the idea of a being existing as a fine line — so that maybe i could see myself not only in the beautiful ambiguity of the neatly divided bilateral gynandromorph but also within the line that divides the masculine from the feminine — that i could exist at the juncture of the two and what that might mean for my whole body and self. like a mosaic?? made of many fine lines??

i mean, doesn't this just scream a gynandromorph baby?

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hmmm also just in case this reaches someone out there who wants to argue that h wearing a suit and hoop skirt doesn't mean he's trans: cis men can for sure wear dresses! but as a non-binary lad i think h might be non-binary *and* i also love how fluid he is in his presentation. as two things that are interrelated but distinct!

i just think gynandromorphs are a really cool lens to think about intersexuality in non-human contexts and spark fun gender presentation thoughts. like lines being fluid? if h's outfit is bilaterally gynandromorphic here but split along like a different axis? anyway

demonstrably i'm still figuring out what that fine line means for me but it felt happily intertwined with my gender love for our dear mum h so yeah! i'm so stoked that your reading mentions gynandromorphism!! what is the class about, if you don't mind me asking?

hope you're well emme 💞

[imherongraystairstrash]

Hi, whenever you have time can you write something about Thomas and Alastair please? Literally anything that isn’t angsty or sad. Fluffy/happy because after COI my heart needs to feel happy again. Thank you💞

Ohh, what a good request! I’ll confess that I was a bit nervous to write this because I didn’t know how I’d compete with COI! The first four bits of dialogue are references to a video Morgan Adams made with her friend, Trinity, because I literally watched that scene and thought “Thomastair” and I just loved it so much that I couldn’t not include it. Also, this is in modern language because I liked how it sounded better. Anyway, I hope this makes your heart feel happy!!

Characters: Alastair & Thomas (fluff)

...

“We’re experiencing life.” Thomas said, poking at the logs with a stick to get the fire to burn brighter. 

“This sucks.” Alastair said, his marshmallow drooping over the fire. 

“No, it’s called life.”

Alastair stared at the fire for a second before saying, “Life sucks.”

Thomas snorted and Alastair looked up and smiled softly, clearly proud that he made Thomas laugh.

Thomas got up from his crouch and sank down next to Alastair, stretching his feet out. Alastair considered his legs before saying, “how the hell did you grow so tall during your travel year? What did they feed you in Spain?”

“I didn’t grow that tall.”

“You were the size of an elf and now you’re taller than the Eiffel Tower.” Alastair said.

Thomas stared into his dark eyes for a moment and narrowed them. “Your marshmallow’s on fire.”

Alastair turned his gaze to said marshmallow. “Ah, an accurate representation of my life so far.” 

Thomas rolled his eyes fondly and reached to grab Alastair’s hand, who took it instantly. Thomas was focusing on how he was playing with the Lightwood ring when they heard the crack of a twig behind them. He and Alastair exchanged a quick glance.

“You don’t think it’s dangerous, do you?” Thomas whispered. “If not the sensor would have picked it up, right?” 

Alastair shrugged, looking in the direction of the sound. “It can’t be my sleep paralysis demon.” He whispered back, “I have to be lying in bed about to sleep for it to be that.”

“You sleep just fine when you’re with me.” Thomas pointed out.

“Exactly. The times I can sleep,” Alastair said, not looking away from the spot, “it’s because you’re there.”

Thomas stared at Alastair’s side profile, the fire casting shadows on the panes of his beautiful face. 

“Pay attention, Lightwood. We could be about to die.”

Thomas sighed. “At least I’d die with you. If we go down, then we go down together.”

“Listen here; I can make jokes about death, but when you do it, you make me sad, so stop.”

“What?” Thomas whispered intensely, “How come you can make me sad with jokes about death, but I can’t make you sad?”

“Are these the kinds of conversations you too have when you’re alone?” Matthew asked, coming out of the shadows.

“You bastard, why did you take so long to come out?” Thomas demanded

Matthew’s jaw dropped in surprise. “I let you take your sweet time. And for your information, I’m already ou—”

“He meant the woods, idiot.” Alastair said.

“Oh, right. Yeah, I was just being dramatic.”

“Lies! His shoelaces got stuck on a branch.” Lucie said. “I saw it.”

Matthew stuck his tongue out at her.

“Anyway, I came to report that we’ve heard no signs of the demon we’re looking for.” Lucie said, popping a marshmallow in her mouth. 

“Yes, we haven’t either.” Matthew said, “Though I came here to get away from Grace and Kit.” He shuddered. "They won’t stop gushing over Darwin’s theory of evolution or something. If I wanted to listen to science talk, I would have just stayed home and asked Father for flirting advice.” 

“Your camp is sad,” Lucie said to Matthew, taking another marshmallow. “Cordelia and I are trying to see who can fit the most grapes in their mouths. I was winning too, but James said to stop or we’d ‘choke and die’ or whatever. Anyway, I’m off to find Jesse.” Lucie said getting up to her feet and skipping away happily. 

“I’m going with her.”

“Let me guess, ‘to protect her’” Thomas said.

“Angel, no. I need her to protect me.” Matthew said. “You haven’t forgotten that she can command the dead, have you?” He didn’t wait for a reply, sprinting away to catch up to Lucie.

“I’m disappointed to say that that wasn’t intolerable.” Alastair said with a frown.

“It’s called getting used to it.” Thomas smiled at Alastair. 

They seemed to have a moment where they lost themselves in each other. Thomas looked into Alastair’s stunning dark eyes, his incredibly long lashes and caramel skin. He liked the way the same strand of silky black hair always seemed to fall across his forehead and into his eyes. And the way Alastair always reached up to push it back. This time, Thomas reached out first. Instead of pushing it back though, he brought it to the side so that his fingers grazed Alastair’s cheek. Alastair’s eyelids softened and he looked down briefly before looking back up at Thomas.

“I never meant to make you sad.” He whispered. 

Thomas shrugged. “As long as what you say about yourself are jokes. Besides, you can never make me sad, because I know you never mean to hurt me.” Thomas said with a smile.

Alastair looked at him, his eyes dancing. “I love you, Thomas.”

“I love you too.”

“You have horrible taste in—”

Thomas cut him off by pressing his lips into a kiss. Alastair’s lips were soft against his own. They kissed slowly and softly as fire crackled in front of them. Thomas felt that part of him was burning from the fire, but his entire being was burning for Alastair. 

Alastair hummed against his lips as Thomas ran his hands down his chest.

“Don’t insult my taste in men, because mine’s the best in the country.” Thomas mumbled into his lips.

Alastair smiled. “What did the world do to deserve you.” He didn’t mean it as a question; Alastair kissed him again before he could even register the words.

He ran his expert hands through Thomas’ hair. Thomas had seen those hands close around fighting spears and he’d seen those hands bandage his own when he burned them during patrol. He’d seen those hands play Chopin’s Nocturne, flying through across the keys to play the different notes. He’d also seen those hands play the songs Thomas had written, bringing life to Thomas’ innermost thoughts, bringing them into existence. Thomas’ songs either coaxed a smile out of Alastair, or brought tears to his eyes.

Now he felt those hands, tugging and caressing his hair. Both boys smiled as they kissed each other, perfectly content with being in the presence of the other. Perfectly content with, after all these years, finally kissing someone they loved and being kissed by someone who loved them. 

Thomas fought back a groan and pulled Alastair closer when the sensor next to them buzzed. 

They broke apart, instantly on their feet, weapons in hand.

“Let’s get this over with.” Thomas sighed.

“Yes, let this be revenge for interrupting us.”  

“That sounds like a good plan.”

Alastair was tightening his leather gauntlets when Thomas spoke.

“Alas?”

Alastair glanced at him in response.

“How about we don’t immediately tell the others we killed the demon?”

Alastair tilted his head to the side before understanding what Thomas meant and grinning fiendishly. “I like the way you think, Tom. Now let’s kill this demon so we can get back to what we were doing.”

Thomas blushed and nodded. As he ran into battle, Alastair beside him, he did so with a smile. 

...

Tagging: @tsccreatorsnet @atla-lok143 @hitheresomeoneusingthus @rinadragomir @youngreckless @autumnangel20 @julemmaes @cupcakesandkittens @no-scones-allowed @fictionally-fantastic @stxr-thxif @writeforjordelia @itsdaughterofthemoon @jordeliasupremacy @cordelia-cardale @will-effing-herondale @axoloteca @heronstairs2014 

*I’m soooo sorry for spamming you all with two fics in like, less than two hours, I swear I didn’t mean to!!

**If you want to be on my tag list, or if you changed your url recently and your not in the tag list anymore, let me know! Oh, an if you asked to be on the tag list and you’re not on it, please tell me (I’m very absentminded haha)

[titoist]

fair warning that i've been slaving away at my keyboard for the last 6 hours, attempting to find a way to sufficiently phrase this post. so i have turned it over and interrogated it for so long, now, that the point in mind has become atomized mush, and thus is maybe a little awkward to read. the process of posting it is now more like casting off a pearl into the ocean as a show of defiance to one's own self - i decided to visit - & scroll through - the blog of someone who i had been extensively modelling myself of off, during the period of experiential emptiness in my identity that i felt had to be.... suffused, filled, forged. scrolling through it has, in the past, consistently led to feelings of... incredible internal dissonance, torpid frustration & exhaustion, despondency. to the point that my conscious decision to pursue that experience could maybe be classified as a form of self harm - in the vaguely analogous vein that people tend to label checking up on your ex-partners as "self harm". though that's a little bit of a silly (& kind of infantile!) understanding of it. i'm not really sure why... if i went back to the exact moment i decided to enter the URL into the search bar, & asked myself the simple question of "why" - i would likely get something of a resigned shrug and hand gesticulation relaying something to the effect of "i think it's impossible and sort of silly to impose upon myself a complete, uh, what, personal embargo on this person? i am curious, & feel confident that i can handle any personal dissonance i experience on account of it". what i did experience, though, was shocking to my core -, probably even more shocking than if i had undergone another complete dissolution of identity! something so horrifying, so profound, it threatens to collapse the hinges holding the entire 21st century afloat!; i really just, um, kind of, did not care that much. at once baffling & exhilarating - or, as baffling & exhilarating as being thoroughly unmoved can get. i expected... much more. even if it was negative. my working theory: the dissonance and borderline-dysmorphia i experienced w/r/t this person was caused not by some intrinsic quality they held, but by the emotions and self-perceptions i projected onto them. (this first part is obvious) now that i have... more-or-less excised my need to do so, forcefully, - like the mental equivalent of the unilateral nationalization of a company - over the last month or so, i am left with an odd void where those feelings would otherwise *go*. i mean, except for the base endearment & admiration that i *do* feel... but that's demonstrably, concretely different. i am very, very wary to keep casually going on their blog, though - as my brain is telling me to¹. that's just a recipe for disaster. maybe i don't have to, really, shut myself off like that, turning off all the monitors and sitting in the dark. maybe it really is just as simple as a matter of self control?² ------------------------------------------------------------------------------ ¹ "my brain wants me to do it" is precisely why i am so wary of extended contact like that in the first place. ² the more rational, technocratic part of my inner monologue is urging me to interrogate this - as...doesn't it all seem to fit in a little *too* nicely? "notice how you've come to a conclusion that just-so-happens to please you."

[duskyvision]

edelweiss & camellia!

edelweiss ⇢ how’d you think of your url/username? what’s it associated with to you?

my url is just my favorite deviloof song (warning for themes and imagery of suicide in the video & the lyrics). my entire layout also comes directly from the music video for it. i know that just saying that with the warnings makes it sound like my state of mind is very worrying, but fortunately it's more of an aesthetic choice here than something that truly reflects my state of mind

the thing is, when i made this tumblr i listened A Lot to this specific song and i also thought it would be a better username to stick to with spaces where i tend to keep mostly to myself and that are meant to be a bit more down to earth and chill. i like to call it a sadboy2007 kind of moment, affectionately

so, obviously, whenever i read my url i'm tempted to listen to the song again, but i also want to ramble about it musically, but that would be better fit for a post where i want to infodump about music and how specific songs just hit like a suckerpunch. it'd mean a lot to me if friends who aren't averse to metal listened to this song, mostly because it feels personal for me to talk a lot about favorite songs from a specific band or artist i really enjoy

on another note, i also associate it to one of my ocs, tsuchie, considering he would listen to this sort of music (and other kinds of absolutely not depressing music. i promise).

camellia ⇢ what were you like when you were younger? do you think you’ve changed a lot?

to be honest? i had more balls as a kid than i do now, but i was also more of a dick. i remember being kind of a bully back in middle school, which i feel a lot of regret about, but i also had the guts to be more confrontational when i had issues with something. but over time, the more my anxiety worsened for redacted reasons, the more reserved i became, and the more i'd keep to myself. overall, i feel i've become the sort of person who feels pressured to be as "agreeable" as possible and who's just become accustomed to take everything in stride without taking a break. it's mentally exhausting, and i've been working on getting better, but i do wish i had some of that early childhood moxie back.

besides that, i've become a lot more sensible in regards to what i consume in terms of media, which i am thankful about.

so... yeah, i think i changed a lot

[bogkeep]

theo’s tarot collection

hi hello i suffer from a terrible ailment called I Keep Acquiring New Tarot Decks Even Though I Am A Tarot Newbie.... so i figured i could do a little writeup about my decks if anyone is interested in that :’) basically i started doing tarot in 2019 because i couldn’t get a hold of a therapist (i was put on a year long waitlist WAHOO) so i basically. self-medicated with tarot readings hahaha. i had a friend who gave me a lot of really good advice and had done some readings for me before who felt immensely comforting. the way i read them is like... it allows you to confront your situation and your emotions through a new angle, but you gotta be brave enough to do it - or ask someone to do it for you. it can be a really intense but also cathartic experience. it’s not for everyone! but i like it. i still consider myself a novice and still learning so i am not in ANY way trying to paint myself as a Knowledgabl Tarot Witch - in a perfect timeline that’s who i wish i was, but i’m ultimately just some guy with a solid appreciation for art and personal growth.

ANYWAY... onto my DECKS (the tumblr post will probably squish the quality outta my photos so i’m gonna link the URLs for Full View)

Children of Litha by Alexandria Huntington

i consider this my main and first deck (i am NOT counting the official homestuck deck i bought as a teen just because i wanted to look at the art. no offense to the homestuck deck i’m just not gonna use fandom decks)! i picked it out but my Tarot Friend gifted it to me... i think it’s a very good starter deck for me personally, and it’s the deck i’ve bonded with and used the most. i even put a fancy sticker on the box as part of the bonding process. i always feel so bad for all of my other decks because i haven’t been able to dedicate as much time for them as i have this one... so it’s definitely the deck i go to for the most accurate readings for myself. Vibes and Thematic Coherence: the art in this is so beautiful and elegant. the symbolism more or less draws on the classic smith-waite deck, but redrawn for its theme. i like that it has a very consistent imagery! out of the major arcana, the fool is the only fully human character - every other character is part animal in some way or other. then the suit of swords depicts birds, winged insects and the air element, coins depict ungulates and equines and earth, wands has felines and canines and fiery imagery, and cups has fish and creatures of and in the sea. the court cards have humans. the suit symbols are always depicted consistently, as white silhouettes. there are also two extra cards: the all and the void. Pamphlet: the reason i think this was a good starter deck is because both because the art feels very intuitive about what it depicts (to me, at least), the descriptions in the pamphlet describe what is happening and why the artist chose this motif for this card. it has honestly helped me remember the meanings a lot, because i’ll be reading the other decks and be like “oh that’s the octopus card i know what the octopus card is about”. there are also little poems next to the main descriptions that work as a pretty solid tl;dr for the core meanings. i also like that the court cards are referred to in the sense of like... a knight is “a young person with masculine energy” rather than “a young man”. it feels more fluid and vibe-y about gender than traditional decks ya feel. on a range from Abstract to Directness this one feels like it sits pretty comfortable in the middle, maybe leaning on Abstractness. it has always given me gentle instructions and advice.

Cardfeel: the cards are very smooth and nice with gold edges. the cards are not NOT solid, but i wish they had been a little thicker because i’m always afraid i’m going to accidentally damage them - but that’s probably a feeling i have about most of my possessions tbh!! i think they’re a good size, too, at least for my small hands. they’re more on the long/slender side so they are good for me to shuffle. i also like the box, it’s a hard flip box with a magnet. i think u can’t go wrong with that. this is the deck i’ve travelled with the most (did u know hotel beds are the best tarot reading spaces. for some reason they just Work). The Spacious Tarot by Annie Ruygt and Carrie Mallon

this is one i really like a lot and want to use more! i absolutely adore the concept of it, but it’s a little harder for me to read than the Litha one. Vibes and Thematic Coherence: this one is like!!! it’s about the open space and the quietness. the vibes are IMMACULATE. the cards aren’t filled to the brim with happenstance and symbolism, but they each feel like a little refuge. very meditative. i also like that the court cards are not gendered at all - there is no page, knight, queen and king, but rather child, explorer, guardian and elder. i am really into that, especially as steps of mastery of their suit. i do think that this deck is probably easier to read if you’re more experienced with tarot meanings and symbolisms, because the illustrations aren’t necessarily that intuitive. Pamphlet: i haven’t read through this one very much, but i think it’s more on the abstract side of the Abstract to Direct scale. it might just feel like that because it describes what the card symbolizes without drawing much on what the card depicts - it is generally a pretty abstract and meditative deck. i like it for what it is! but it’s harder for me to read than my main Litha deck. Cardfeel: there’s something about the cardfeel i wish was different. they’re perfectly ok cards, they’re smooth and not too thin, but i still wish they had had more heft or something. while the cards fit very well into my hands i think maybe they could’ve been Larger to emphasize their motifs of openness and space. or texture. or gilded edges. i really don’t know what i want. the box however is very good and easy to open and use!! never underestimate a good box.

Tarot of the Divine by Yoshi Toshitani

this is a deck i Had To Get because i knew the artist was working on it and i was always Planning To... it is not a deck i use very often but i absolutey adore it. you can also get it with an accompanying fairytale book, i thought i had ordered that but i was Wronge. Vibes and Thematic Coherency: it depicts motifs and characters from stories, myths, and fairytales from a vast variety of cultures. it’s AMAZING. the art is so clean and crisp and i was VERY EXCITED to find a card drawing on a sami story (page of coins)! i don’t have a lot to say except that yoshi yoshitani has done some incredible work on this. Pamphlet: while i do not have the Fairytale Book edition, the pamphlet is really super nice because it shows pictures of the cards, lists what story it depicts and where the story is from, gives a short description for how this scene or character embodies the card. it then lists some of the Card Characteristics beneath. very simple but very nice. i really like pamphlets that explain Why the artist picked the motifs they did - for me personally it really helps me connect to the deck and their symbols. it’s probably more on the Direct side of the scale thanks to this. Cardfeel: these are textured!! they feel like the playing card deck my grandmother has, which feels apt to me. textures make the cards feel solid to me. they’re also a very nice size to hold. the edges are not guilded, but with the white frames it looks good and nice. the box is nice but also Large, possibly to fit with the book? might not be ideal for travel, but there’s nothing stopping you from getting a different box or pouch.

The Star Spinner Tarot by Trung Le Nguyen

my most recent deck... i KNEW about the artist and the deck from before, but wasn’t PLANNING to get it, but then i saw it in the comic book store and i wasn’t able to pass it by. no regrets, it’s a wonderful deck. Vibes and Thematic Coherence: absolutely lovely art and style. it’s another deck drawing on fairytale themed motifs. i’m loving the use of colors and circles. it also has four different cards for the Lovers so you can choose which one(s) speak to you the most, something i think is just wonderful. i think the only thing i found a little... odd? was that the suit of Wands looks kinda same-y, which isn’t a bad thing, but it was the only suit that looked that way to me. they’re still very very nice. ALSO THE BACK OF THE CARDS ARE SHINY. I JUST THINK THAT’S VERY LOVELY. as a Physical Product these are chef’s kiss. Pamphlet: on the Abstract to Directness scale, these are VERY DIRECT. the pamphlet doesn’t say a lot about why the cards depict what they do, but go straight into card meaning, and in a very unambiguous way. i think it can both work very well, leaving you little room to avoid your feelings, but it also has a higher margin to miss completely. for being such a cutesy deck full of fairies the pamphlet is definitely giving you a smack at the side of your head. i haven’t used this deck a lot yet due to its newness, but i definitely want to try it out more to see what it does to me.

Cardfeel: out of all of my decks i think this has the best cardfeel... the cards feel really solid, and have a very good size that feel just right for them. like i sort of fell in love with the deck when i actually started shuffling it and browsing the cards. buying cards - especially on the internet - can be a gamble because you Can’t Know The Cardfeel. with decks like the Spacious Tarot i got a little dissappointed, but this one was a very pleasant surprise. also the box is very good and look like a work of art. The Fyodor Pavlov Tarot

honestly one of my new favourite decks that i ABSOLUTELY am going to use more and become more familiar with. also a deck that i knew the artist was working on, and supported the kickstarter the moment it was announced. my deck also came with two Magician cards and i don’t know why. extra wizard for me??? Vibes and Thematic Coherence: the look and feel of this deck is Immaculate. it looks very classical and traditional (and absolutely gorgeous), it is grounded in the classical smith-waite imagery but Expands Upon It, draws on the diversity of human culture and experiences... also loving the energy of “THIS CARD IS TRANS NOW AND THERE’S NOTHING YOU CAN DO ABOUT IT” many cards have (most famously the Lovers, but i don’t want to post pics of any of the cards depicting nudity or risqué themes on tumblr). i absolutely adore the knight of coins card (THE HORSE IS HIS FRIEND AND SERVICE ANIMAL!!). it’s just Really Very Good. also the backside has pretty Shiny stars and i like it. Pamphlet: i really like this one. it is a deeply personal pamphlet, where fyodor pavlov directly discusses his relationship to the cards and why he chose the motifs he did. it feels really grounded in the world we live in, and also such a vulnerable thing to share with us all. it’s on the Direct side of the scale without necessarily telling you “the card is definitely this one thing”. my only wish is that it was easier to navigate at a glance. Cardfeel: THEY ARE TEXTURED!!! these cards are definitely long and slender and benefit someone with larger hands than mine, but i still like them a lot. i do wish they had been a smidge heavier just so i wouldn’t worry so much about damaging them... but i don’t want to be ungrateful. the deck and the box are wonderfully crafted. The Botanica Tarot by Kevin Jay Stanton

oh boy did i support the kickstarter for this one... i had actually bought the major arcana when it was the only version available, and then the artist decided to make a full deck. it’s an absolute work of art. Vibes and Thematic Coherence: oh boy oh boy does it serve vibes and thematic coherence. it’s Plants all the way down, OBVIOUSLY, but also like... every card in the minor arcana depicts their suit in its own way. like the range of coins/currency from various times and cultures?? AMAZING. looking at the art of this deck is a DELIGHT. every card manages to be beautiful and interesting despite there not being a single living creature depicted on any of them. i WILL say they, same as the spacious tarot, are not the most intuitive to read if you’re not super familiar with either the Plants or the meanings of the cards. Pamphlet: you can fit so much plant knowledge in this one. i got a version of the deck with a beautiful little book, but there’s also a small pamphlet that follows the deck itself (which i admittedly have not looked too closely at yet). there’s descriptions for why this specific plant has been chosen for each card, and then some Card Meaning Keywords. so definitely on the Abstract side of my imaginary tarot pamphlet scale, because you mostly have plant symbolism to go on. i haven’t done a lot of readings with this deck, i’ll be honest - but it’s a beautiful treasure that i adore. Cardfeel: they’re Smoothe and Guilded edges. they can feel a little wide for my hands, but not so much that i cannot shuffle. i think maybe a smidge of texture wouldve been good with this deck since it would fit the look of the painted art. i also did get like... a big kickstarter reward version of this deck. it came in a tin box with extra treasures and a cloth and pins... the actual card box itself is beautiful to look at, but i have to say that the one i got is VERY HARD TO OPEN. i might transfer the cards into a pouch if i want to be reading them more often. IKEA deck

yes this is a meme deck and i don’t really use it but I WANTED TO SHARE... i think the major arcana is very cool and funny, but i was dissappointed to find that the suit cards are just “ikea part but Multiple Times”. it also does not come with a pamphlet. also yes yes it’s funny that the names of the cards are spelled in a “silly ikea word language” BUT IKEA NAMES ARE JUST SWEDISH....... IT’S NOT A SECRET LANGUAGE IT’S JUST SWEDISH............ it’s a funny deck to have and it doesn’t take up much space so eh! shrugs!!! The Lubanko Tarot by Emily Lubanko

another kickstarter deck... it’s gorgeous but there is a chance i might gift it to someone else. not because i regret getting it or don’t like it, but because i already have so many decks that speak to me, while this one gives me vibes of serving someone else better. does that make any sense? i admittedly haven’t looked at the pamplet so much so i think i’m going to skip that description for this one. Vibes and Thematic Coherency: the MOVEMENT and the COLORS... it’s Capturing Feelings in a really good way. i mean. i got it for the vibes and it’s serving vibes. Cardfeel: Smoothe Cards. shiny silver edges, like a slippery fish in a rapid river. it feels good and right for this deck. also good box. i know most of these decks have Good Box, it’s just the botanica one that let me down by being difficult. The Oriens Tarot by AmbiSun

i don’t have this deck anymore, i gifted it to my boyfriend... i found these pics on my twitter. it’s one of the first decks i supported on kickstarter and it’s VERY pretty, and it has HOLOGRAPHIC RAINBOW EDGES HOT DAMN. it’s another one of those instances where i Yearned for it and then found that it didn’t fit me as well as i had hoped. tarot is just one of those things where you have to find what Works for you. at this time the children of litha was working so well for me and i really liked the depiction of animals in it, i wasn’t able to connect to another animal deck in the same way... and it was before my tarot collection snowballed into what i have now. C’EST LA VIE ... i don’t have a smith-waite deck. i’m a fake tarot fan. i am however familiarizing myself by following Jessica Dore on twitter and subscribing to her monthly newsletters. i really love how she talks about these cards and how she interprets them.

[tchaikovskymybeloved]

I was tagged by the lovely @bowiepop to do this tag, thank you, Maja! 💋

Why did you choose your URL? It’s pretty simple — I started this account right after I got into The Beatles and I was very much enamoured by Paul (still am, will always be). It was also the time I fell in love with the bass guitar. So I decided to name the account after Paul’s bass guitar, as simple as that. And of course, Hofner’s Violin Bass is one of the most beautiful instruments out there, I’m honored to share a name with that majestic creation.

Any side blogs? If you have them, name them and why do you have them? I don’t have any side blogs, I’d rather dump everything in one place, which is probably not the best idea. I love blogs that have one specific theme — they give an impression that they got their act together, but I also love my little chaos of a blog where I post whatever I’m feeling and loving at the moment.

How long have you been on tumblr? Since fall 2017, if I remember correctly. So three years, almost four years? Have been an active user for like four-five months now.

Do you have a queue tag? Oh please, the queue function only makes sense for those blogs that people actually care about. Still, I never got the point of it, but oh well.

Why did you start your blog in the first place? It’s 2017, I just got into The Beatles and classic rock, I got depression for the first time in my life, I cut off my family and friends, felt I had nowhere to go and needed a place to feel safe in. And ta-dah, this blog was created.

Why did you choose your icon/pfp? Because Johnny Marr looks divine in that screenshot (thanks to @visible-disappointment for providing that masterpiece, by the way) and I happen to love that man like a lot.

Why did you choose your header? Because The Strokes. Because their music has been the main source of my happiness for the last few months. Because I wanted to have them somewhere on my blog to state my all-consuming love for them. Because that picture is absolutely gorgeous. Because The Strokes!

What’s your post with the most notes? I have never posted original content on here. I post rants sometimes, but I don’t think it qualifies as a legitimate post since it’s just walls of text about random things. But hey, my rant about The Strokes was a big hit the other day, it got two likes!

How many mutuals do you have? I have no idea. Probably about twenty? I genuinely have no idea.

How many followers do you have? 82.

How many people do you follow? 52.

Have you ever made a shitpost? I’m not sure what “shitpost” means in this context, but since I’ve never posted anything, I don’t think so. Though every single rant I drop can be considered a shitpost.

How often do you use tumblr each day? I would say one to two hours throughout the day, daily or every other day. Sometimes I disappear for weeks when I feel like it. I don’t use social media, so using this app every day makes me feel overwhelmed. Also, I get borderline addicted to tumblr when I use it every day, which I hate. I hate the feeling of being addicted to something, so I stop using tumblr when I get the sense that it’s getting a little out of hands. I need to find the balance I guess.

Did you ever have a fight/argument with another blog once? Who won? The image of me having a beef with another blog on tumblr is one of the most hilarious things that has ever entered my mind. Excuse me while I try to stop my giggle fit.

How do you feel about “you need to reblog this” posts? I don’t like it when people get manipulated into liking/reblogging posts, that feels quite cheap, if you ask me. But hey, if it works for you, then good, I don’t really mind them.

Do you like tag games? Oh yeah. I think the fact that I’m taking the time of my day to do this long tag says it all.

Do you like ask games? I do! I love it when my mutuals do them, but I never do them myself, I don’t really know why.

Which of your mutuals do you think is tumblr famous? All of them, sometimes I don’t understand why so many cool people follow me back.

Do you have a crush on a mutual? Oh hell yeah. I have a platonic crush on a few of them, they’re just that lovely.

Tagging @sixtiesfangirl, @kazookazoo, @visible-disappointment, @stevielynnicks, @wholelottajonesy, @inbetweenights, @polyphonicsounds, @selftitled1984, @merrumeru, @crshdet, if you feel like it and haven’t done this one!

[bae-science]

it’s t-t-t-t-time for another newt bae-science fic rec extravabonanza! same rules, same boys, same bullshit! let’s get into it:

a beginning; a second chance by @dykesword

other newt and i have a long and intricate ritualistic battle to become the alpha newt, but i gotta give credit where it’s due. if you like to annotate your books for fun, this fic will give you a looooong comment you’ll want to write, and for good reason! there’s a lot of really well done metaphor and character detail in here, while still keeping a very soft, melancholy but with a hopeful edge tone. and also, like, the care and detail in which newt’s mental state in the aftermath of the precursors’ abuse is depicted is so so good, and delightful to read

husbandly duties by @kingeiszler

i am soooo biased with this one bc technically it was made for me but GODDAMN it’s good. this shit has everything: gottlieb trio sibling dynamics, vanessa in giant femme earrings, hermann yearning, newt and karla infodumping together, newt’s terrible and accurate gaydar, gay crime, the newmann dynamic and why it works boiled down to its bare essentials, pride and prejudice glasses touch, and neon green acrylics. required reading for the vanessaverse

Say That Again by @robertfrobisherslover

WOOF. if you like mutual pining and lack of communication from men with rocks for their emotional processing centers, and guncle (gay uncle) newt and hermann and KILLER artsy sex scenes, and themes of words unsaid in a story about LANGUAGE..... oogoogogoogouhufug. the writing style is clear and well paced, i LOVE little mako’s scene she’s such a cutie, and there’s like. a line. that’s a play on the whole “it’s always been you” trope. that lives in my mind rent free forever.

speak right to my heart without saying a word by @thekaidonovskys

i’m just gonna paste the comment i left on it here, because that sums up what is so absolutely incredible about this fic the best:

so sometimes you stumble on a piece of fiction that you add to your little collection of stuff you would show a person if you wanted them to understand a part of you that you can't quite explain eloquently, or it would take too long, etc etc, and i've never really found something like that for my autism until now, which, like, poggers. and i'll be as straight up as i can while still being the biggest lesbian in the great state of ohio (not a hard feat but alan invented computers so i love continuing on the autistic tradition of being a living miracle), the chameleon effect hit me like a mack truck. catholic school in the deep south is the most potent and effective form of ABA therapy imaginable :/. so sometimes i wonder what i would be like if i didn't have such a strong ability to pass, and here's where we finally get to the part of this comment where i just vomit compliments at you: you nailed it. you got it. i don't know if you're on the spectrum, but either way, well fucking done. trauma therapy research talks a lot about healing fantasies, which are fantasies, usually in the form of daydreams, that abused/neglected/traumatized/etc people create that directly address a struggle they have and take the form of a scenario in which that struggle is helped in some way. it could be an abusive parent repenting and showering them with the love they never had, or someone finding them during a panic attack and somehow knowing how best to comfort them without having to ask, or being intimate with someone and having a scar or physical deformity they've been shamed for be given attention and care. and i think you have created the ultimate perfect healing fantasy for autistic people, or at least those with """"high functioning"""" autism. it has a character who is visibly and undeniably on the spectrum having the pain and trauma going through life like that causes being acknowledged and validated, they are purposefully paid attention to because person b genuinely likes them and wants to understand and respect who they are and how they function in the world, and thus get The Mortifying Ordeal of Being Known as well as the eventual rewards of being loved, person b makes a genuine effort to help teach them social skills in a way they can understand and learn through and is there for them when these skills are being practiced, their space and boundaries are respected but they aren't infantilized or thought of as an emotionless robot, and they receive love and comfort on their own terms not despite of but because of who they are, even specifically being asked not to change the way they are because that way is lovable. they are openly desired. writing is my fucking JOB and it's still difficult to put into words how much you got 100000% right about the dream with this fic. i have been in the EXACT and i mean EXACT same situation as hermann when he asked newt if it was his personality itself that made people not like him, because i deadass made a spreadsheet of all my personality attributes i thought could be preventing me from making friends in college, and then asked my fellow nd friend to see if there was anything i was missing. so i guess what i'm trying to say is that this amazing, and i'm bookmarking it and putting it on my next fic rec post, and maybe one day way way in the future if i ever get a partner i want to explain the whole autism thing to, i'm gonna have them read this.

The Facts With Newton Geiszler, PhD by what_alchemy (NSFW)

storytime: i read this fic a few years ago, completely forgot the title and author, and ended up thinking about the part where hermann admits to having fucked a trailer hitch when he was a teenager, at least once a week. last november, i say to my friend samara on twitter, head of the BSHCU (buttslut hermann cinematic universe), hey this seems like something you’d have read, do you remember a fic where... and samara says FUCK i do know what you’re talking about lemme find it. so if the fact that i have been looking for this fic for like, two years, and that it contains a moment so iconic all i had to say is, “hermann says he fucked a trailer hitch” and she IMMEDIATELY knew what i was talking about, does not convince you to read this... go back to catholic school i guess.

Feeling Blue by TempusPetrichor

fics where newt goes back to work as a biologist, especially a xenobiologist, post pru are really interesting, and usually have something neat to say about recovery, how it isn’t linear, how it often involves us returning to things we love for comfort, etc. this one sure does! some good emotional and physical h/c, LOVE the use of the ghost drift, and it’s always fun to see post pru fics use dialogue very obviously taken from dbt, trauma-specific therapeutical texts, and anything that shows the author has experience with, or did their research on, ptsd therapies.

You’re Everyone That Ever Cared by KlavierWrites

you know a fic is good when it’s an only 9k slowburn and still manages to reach infinite regress levels of are you fucking KIDDING GO TO THERAPY. newt “acts of service” geiszler may have a little misplaced misogyny due to his broken woman-centric gaydar. as a treat. the fucking. post-drift scene where hermann subtextually screams “LOOK IN OUR BRAINS YOU FUCK I’M IN LOVE WITH YOU I JUST HAVE AUTISM AND CAREER IN STEM DISORDER” is soooooo. god just hermann in general in that scene is great. if you like classic mid 2010s era newmann, ghost drift romance, and good ole mutual pining, this is a treat.

Baby, You're Hotter than my Bunsen Burner by SkySongMA

moronosexual hermann representation is something that can actually be so personal

Times of Stress by RadioMoth

the boys are processinggggggg. man what a good, quick and powerful punch to the gut. if you like post-pr1 catharsis and physical h/c, AND are the one friend that likes to comment at the end of the movie that hey newt got beat the fuck UP, check this one out.

black tea by @faggotcas

okay first of all, god fucking tier url, lee. second of all, food as a love language is my SHIT. i love the very slow relationship development here, where you see them making a genuine effort to get along and that in turn leading to feelings reigniting. it’s such a sweet little moment of a fic, with a nice atmosphere and tone to fit it

now here’s the part where i usually drop my latest fic, but i haven’t written one this month because i’ve been busy launching an audio drama! you can find it here, it’ll be right up your alley if you like cryptids and gay scientists and enemies to lovers and good ole americana, but since this is a newmann post, i’m gonna recommend the pacific rim audio drama duology i did a while back! part one is called conversations from the brink, and it’s a little slice of the pr3 we better fucking get from streaming that godawful looking anime. love and lesbians to everyone ❤️

[belfrygargoyles]

I Answer Questions I Get About Star Wars Fanfiction

So, when I made this post a while back, I did end up getting quite a few people coming to me for advice!

And while I was happy to give what help I could through tumblr DMs, there was also quite a bit I was realizing was a bit Much to be conveyed just through the DM format.

So, while this is by no means a catch-all, comprehensive list of what to do and what not to do, I thought I’d make a post going into a bit more detail! I’ll specifically be addressing questions/concerns that have been brought to me, mostly

Because of the specific subject matter of the original post, most of the question askers were white/cis/het women, so much of what I cover will be directed at authors of that specific demographic.

The brunt of the post is about writing reader-characters of different demographics and why “gender-neutral” reader-inserts tend to fail to reach that mark, but the first two points I address are related to racism and fetishism in writing. Because of this, I want to preface: I am White, and I will never be an authority on what is or is not racist or fetishistic. These are questions I, specifically, have received, and needed more space to elaborate on. Everything I say, I have learned by listening to fans of color speaking out about the ways they and characters of color are treated and by doing my own research into the subject- my experience and advice is not exhaustive, I cannot cover every important facet, and my word should never, ever come before that of a person of color speaking about the same subject.

If while reading, you come across something that is not true, is offensive, harmful, or otherwise just not good advice for me to give, please contact me and I will remove or edit as needed.

I’m a White, cishet woman, and I like to write fanfiction about characters I find attractive who are men of color. How can I avoid writing fetishistic or racist stereotypes? 

To recognize fetishism, you first need to understand racial stereotypes and why they’re harmful, even if they’re “positive.”

First thing’s first: there is no such thing as a positive stereotype. All stereotypes bring with them the very real potential to harm people, demean or belittle them, isolate them, impact their social life, work environment, and how they interact with the world and the people around them, regardless of race, gender, sexual orientation, religion, culture, or body type.

It is very important that you seek out and listen to the word of these people themselves. Understand why it is harmful to write a story about a “savage” tribal man seducing a White colonizer (and why “savage” is a terrible word to use to describe someone in the first place). Understand why it is suspicious to be obsessed with the sexual prowess of dark-skinned men. Understand why the common tropes and stereotypes you see associates with people of color are harmful, and understand that this is not about you. This is not about what you want to see as a reader, this is not about the specific fantasies you want to write out with a certain character, this is not about your fulfillment and enjoyment, because you are the person writing and putting your writing into the world for others to see and consume. The way you portray your characters and the situations they are in is important.

Second: you need to learn how to step back and examine your own thoughts and behavior for bias, conscious and subconscious.

Would you think the same way about a character if they were a woman? Would you write a character with the same personality if they were White? Would you think two characters have the same romantic tension and chemistry if they were different genders?

For example: In the game Subnautica: Below Zero, the player character is Robin, a Black woman. At some point in the game, she expresses defensiveness in response to unintentionally rude remarks about the human body, from a source that would have no idea that it was rude. Her offense and defensive tone is not at all unwarranted or unreasonable, nor does she hold a grudge, but upon first playthrough I found myself thinking, “man, Robin’s kind of a bitch.”

Then I remembered the fact that Black women are frequently seen as aggressive, rude, and “pushy,” and that Black women in media are commonly seen by (White) fans as “mean” in comparison to other (White) characters who act the same way, if not worse. I realized that at no point in the game does Robin ever act spiteful, cruel, selfish, or vindictive towards the source of the offending comments. She was someone who was proud of her physical capabilities and the hard work she put into her body’s fitness, and she was not in the wrong for getting offended at the implication that her body was flawed or inefficient. Throughout the game, Robin is patient, driven, compassionate, and forgiving, and expresses grief, frustration, offense, and anger as is appropriate for the situations she finds herself in.

What I had done was subconsciously put Robin in a set box of character traits based off of racist stereotypes and characterizations frequently seen in media and fanworks. I didn’t realize I was doing it in the moment, and had to take a step back to examine the source media and my own behavior, and realized I was projecting a completely false idea of what Robin, a Black woman, should be like as a character.

That is an example of subconscious racial bias. Subconscious racial fetishism can look more like...

- Believing male characters of color all have insatiable sexual appetites and massive penises

- Automatically headcanoning characters who are large, burly, strong, or aggressive as Black or dark-skinned

- Putting East Asian women on a pedestal for being beautiful, pure, innocent- or, on the flip side, as beautiful and “please queen roundhouse kick me” treating her as “beautiful but fierce.”

These examples, alone, in singular instances, aren’t fetishism- headcanoning a single man of color as sexual and being well-endowed isn’t fetishism alone, headcanoning a single physically large and strong character as Black isn’t fetishism, thinking an East Asian woman is exceptionally beautiful and elegant isn’t fetishism.

It’s how you do it in relation to how you interact with other characters. Do you only ever write about a male character of color in a highly sexualized context or only ever talk about how big his penis is and what you want him to do to you? Is that large and forceful character the only one you headcanon as having dark skin? Do you fawn over East Asian women as beautiful goddesses and “dragon ladies” but never actually explore them as anything else but just being there for decoration?

(Warning for the next paragraph: intersex fetishism, racist tropes in Star Wars fandom)

Something I commonly see in the Star Wars sphere of fandom is, particularly with the clones, use of the word “savage” or “feral.” For the sake of not singling anyone out, I won’t use URLs, but an example I recently saw firsthand was a prompt about Stewjonis (e.g. Obi Wan) all being intersex and “fertile” and as such exceptionally desirable to the clones, described as having a “hunger” and having “savage, animalistic instincts,” including having a violent, animalistic rage they unleash when they think the White man they think they own is in danger.

The author is fetishizing intersex people (making Obi Wan, a White man being paired with brown men, intersex for the sole purpose of making him “fertile” and able to be impregnated for the sake of a breeding kink- he’s not written as intersex just to be intersex representation, he’s written as an idealized fantasy of intersex for the sake of keeping him “male” but also able to get pregnant to fulfill the author’s bioessentialist fantasies of aggressive, animalistic cis men of color inherently desiring and being unable to help their “instincts” around a “fertile mate.”) and using a common racist stereotype for brown men: that they are “savage,” “animalistic,” sexually aggressive, sexually driven, violent, and sexually dominating over “smaller” (Ewan Mcgregor is 5′10, Temuera Morrison is 5′7. Even if you headcanon the clones as 6′0, as Wookieepedia defaults every adult male human to, that’s still only two inches of difference) light-skinned love interests (who have a vagina).

At a very, very basic level, I can get why the idea of such a dynamic might be appealing: the idea of someone finding you desirable and protecting you/fighting for you without reservation, the idea of “instincts” showing someone’s true feelings they can’t fight for you, etc. etc.. When that’s what you’re going for, it’s a case of you really, really needing to think long and hard about the characters you’re using and how you’re portraying them. I mean, you need to really think about it.

And I get it if it’s a trope you really like or a dynamic you really want to write, but I repeat: this isn’t about you. It’s about the image and stereotypes you may or may not be reinforcing about people of color, men of color, and intersex people to yourself and your readership.

This is the best advice I can give you: Take a step back. Check yourself. Check the way you think about a character, the way you write them, and the way they are portrayed in canon. Think about why you want to write the situation you want to write. Think about how you are portraying the character, and how it might be interpreted by people who aren’t in your brain. Ask yourself if you really think the character would act that way, or if that’s just how you think they should act, and then ask yourself why.

If you find that what you are writing might be falling into fetishistic or derogatory tropes or stereotypes, that’s where you stop. Identify what, specifically, about the situation or scenario appeals to you. Identify why the characters appeal to you. See if you can use those elements in a way that doesn’t reinforce those stereotypes.

2. When does a smut fic involving a man of color become fetishistic? What if an author is simply exaggerating pre-existing character traits for the sake of a smut scenario? Is writing characters partaking in specific kinks or tropes fetishism by default because they’re played by men of color?

I’ll go down the line:

- The short answer: when you use fetishistic tropes. The longer answer: when you use tropes in a context that could be considered fetishistic, and do nothing to add depth to the situation. Show that you put thought into your decisions, and show us why you believe the character would do/act/think that way. If you can’t because it doesn’t make sense and it’s just something you want to happen to engineer a specific trope (E.X. Clones never getting any sex ed ever and freaking out at the thought of a vagina), don’t do it. Are you focusing on a character as a dominant party in bed? Then analyze how you’re portraying that, if you’re using animal comparisons, references to how small and petite his submissive partner is, if you’re portraying it as a healthy sexual relationship or if you’re implying that he’s always possessive, domineering, and intimidating towards his partner- it very much helps to have beta readers.

- Then the author needs to put effort into the scenario they’re writing and really examine why those are the character traits they’re exaggerating in a character of color. Why, of all the character’s traits, are you choosing to play up his strength, size, and aggression in the way that you are? If you still really want to write it: write the characters discussing it as a BDSM roleplay scene or show aftercare that tells us that’s not what the character is normally like, but was an act he was putting on in a pre-agreed scenario. Oftentimes, the issue can be that the author makes no effort to show that this isn’t how the character acts outside of the bedroom, or even erases that line completely by showing no difference between how the character treats his partner in day-to-day life and in bed.

- Not at all. You can write Boba Fett being a Dom and having kinky sex all you want- but it needs to make sense. By that I mean-  writing OOC, shallow smut isn’t a sin, but when it involves men of color, especially in situations where they have already been highly sexualized and fetishized, you, as an author have to think about how you’re writing them. You have to think about if you’re just using them as sockpuppets to write out a dom fantasy you already had pre-engineered, and you need to think about why, exactly, you want to use that specific character in that specific role. Are you writing about the character, or are you using their name and face as a prop to play out the fantasy?

3. I’m White/cis/het/female and I write reader-insert fanfiction, I...

a. ...try to keep my readers ambiguous, but I think I still mess up.

First: Accept that some measure of character description is needed for your readers to not feel like they’re inhabiting the fictional body of a ghost. You’ll never be able to be 100% ambiguous, and that’s okay. Parts of who we are and the way we experience the world will always leak into our writing, and that’s just part of the experience. What’s important is that you’re able to recognize where your experiences are not universal, and decide on if that’s something you can change in your writing.

Next: Some basic tips for common whoopsies that are easy to overlook.

- Hair length, color, and texture

Instead of saying something that implies a particular hair type, such as the way it blows in the wind or how the reader-character brushes or styles it, you can reference that they just have hair without going into detail, such as:

“He found himself unable to sleep that night- normally, he would count the rivets in the ceiling until they blurred together, but now he had a new distraction catching his eye. Your hair against his pillow was new, novel- he found his eyes tracing the strands from root to tip, the way the dim light catching on the strands almost hypnotic, and before he knew it he was delicately tracing his fingertips along a patch near your ear that had grown in what was, to his sleep-deprived mind, an utterly fascinating whorl.” Vs. describing a character running his fingers through the reader’s hair.

- Body type

I will say: sometimes, it makes a reader-insert infinitely more engaging if we have just scant details about the reader character, but that’s usually if the details are uncommon in the genre. By this, I mean: if a reader-insert specified that the reader-character was actually buff and very tall, I would already be more invested, because I never see reader-characters like that.

This being said, when you want ambiguity, when it comes to body type avoid referencing the reader’s weight, size, musculature, height, and build- nothing about curves, nothing about hips, nothing about stomachs.

Again, you can reference that the reader has these things, but without specifying that their stomach is flat or their hips are curvy or that they look small and delicate compared to the love interest. What I see the most of is references to the reader being notably shorter, lighter, or weaker than other characters. If someone is targeting the reader over, say, Din, because they look like they’d be an easier target, instead of saying that it’s because the reader is the smaller, “weaker-looking” target, make note of it being because of some other vulnerability- armor, lack of visible weaponry, hands aren’t free, distracted, because they saw the reader choke on an apple seed in the market earlier and it made them think they were incompetent and easy to take out, etc.

- Skin color

This one is the most basic, but also easy to mess up. Along with things like hair type being correlated with race (ie if you describe a reader-character with long, fine, straight hair, you are excluding the possibility of the reader-character being Black), something that can be easy for lighter-skinned authors to forget is that blush, flush, sunburn, and pallor aren’t easily visible on all skin colors.

If you want to write things like that but don’t know how to portray them without indicating skin tone, try instead using temperature. Reference the reader feeling heat rise to their cheeks, or the uncomfortable warmth radiating from a minor burn, or how cold and clammy their skin feels.

- Unnecessary references to the reader’s gender (E.X. gendered bathrooms, dressing rooms, calling the reader-character things like “the girl” or “the woman”)

If you’re writing a fic with a gender-neutral reader, you do not need to use any of those in the story. I promise, you don’t. If you have to, either find a way around it or just... don’t. If you want to make the reader gender-neutral, you don’t need these. I promise.

If you’re writing a gender-neutral but explicitly AFAB reader: also don’t use these, because it defeats the purpose of you saying the reader is supposed to be gender-neutral. In fact, make the reader’s gender the absolute LAST thing you put in the fic. Write the whole thing as if the concept of gender doesn’t exist.

- Typically gendered characteristics such as voice pitch and tone, face shape, chest, hips, hands, height

See above. The thing is, none of these things are inherently indicative of gender, but for many people, they are. If you say you’re writing a gender-neutral reader, but include reference to very feminine-associated traits, you’re telling the reader that you wrote the reader-character as essentially Girl Lite.

Something not enough people realize is that there are AMAB nonbinary people, there are cis AFAB women who are very masculine, and so on. “Gender-neutral” shouldn’t mean “Female 2″ or “tomboy.”

- And think to yourself: Would I write a male character acting this way?

This is... self-explanatory. And also very important. And why I say to make gender the absolute last thing you put in the fic. I’ll talk more about this specifically at the end!

Something important to note: Nonbinary is not the same as gender-neutral!

Nonbinary specifically refers to the gender identity in which you are neither strictly male nor strictly female- your gender identity exists outside of the male-female binary.

Gender-neutral means that references to the reader’s gender are removed and it can be read by someone of any sex or gender without being taken out of the experience by gendered traits or situations.

...want to start writing readers who aren’t like me, but don’t know where to start.

Just do it, really. That’s the best way to do it. You don’t have to make it a major part of the fic!

I can only really speak on the experience of being nonbinary and reading fics written by cis authors, and again, at the very end I’ll go more into personal feelings and experience, but I really do mean just write it. Get a beta reader, or friends to look it over. Ask people from different reader demographics what they want to see. It doesn’t have to change the entire course of your writing.

...am afraid of writing a different kind of reader-character and getting something wrong.

It happens! No one can know every experience under the sun, and if you’re not writing from experience, you’re bound to get one or two details wrong.

But! That shouldn’t stop you from doing it! This is where getting a beta reader or having a discord server really helps, you can get viewpoints from people with different experiences to tell you what does and doesn’t work.

At the end of this post I’ll talk about things I, specifically, would like to see as a trans person, and how being nb affects the way I see things.

4. What’s wrong with dysphoria fics?

from here on out is personal conjecture

Nothing. I just don’t like them because, well.

They’re basically the only time I ever see fics with an explicitly trans reader, and they all follow the exact same formula: Someone or something triggers reader’s dysphoria, the reader is sad and having a bad time, the love interest comes in and validates the reader’s gender and it’s all better.

One: I’ve never seen this done with a trans woman reader.

Two: It’s... tiring, having the only representation you ever see of yourself being about dysphoria. A lot of the fics are written as personal comfort fics or were requested by a trans person with dysphoria, and that’s fine, but I want to see a grand, multi-chapter fic with an engaging plot and reader-character engagement that just... has a trans reader. It’s not a thing, they just are, because trans people’s lives don’t constantly revolve around how trans they are.

There are more “nonbinary” reader fics than there are fics about trans men or trans women. And all the nonbinary readers are AFAB- I have not seen a SINGLE AMAB nonbinary reader-insert in the Star Wars fandom.

It’s just one of those things that is just... it’s not bad, it’s just kind of exhausting? I’m the kind of person who wants to see stories of people like me just on adventures, not more about how miserable we are because our bodies are wrong or something.

I don’t speak for every trans person, I don’t and I never will. But I think a lot of the people who request dysphoria fic... don’t actually want to read about that. Body dysphoria is touted as the defining trans experience, and a lot of people genuinely believe you have to be dysphoric to be trans. Not only is this not true, but it’s also harmful. Hating your body sucks. Hating your body specifically because you know people use it to judge how to treat you super sucks. Thinking you have to hate your body or else you’re not really trans and are just pretending? Ultra suck.

I’m nonbinary, my partner is a trans man. I’ll paste his thoughts on the matter (minor edits to punctuation and paragraph breaks):

“But in all honesty it’s very very tiring, I think the majority of people asking for a dysphoria fic don’t actually realise they want something else. Many trans people feel dysphoria, myself included, but not all of them do, and it doesn’t make them any less trans, but the overall focus on dysphoria has made it this be all end all thing in and out of the trans community. It’s what people often think of when they think of trans people and while it’s certainly a thing, I think the focus has become entirely too toxic. I think newer trans people tend to internalise dysphoria a lot, especially if they don’t experience it to an extent which is ‘acceptable enough to be considered trans’.

Given that context I think that what a lot of people are looking for when they ask writers for dysphoria fics is actually validation and gender euphoria. They want validation of their gender identity because they’ve recently experienced dysphoria and are looking for escapism. It’s something I myself have only come to realise recently despite being out as trans for a considerable amount of time. I don’t expect cis writers to fully understand the intensely personal and nuanced relationship every trans person has with gender and identity, nor do I blame them for using dysphoria as a go-to, especially when the request was for a dysphoria fic. I am however asking writers to instead try more validation and less focus on the bad aspects of being trans such as dysphoria and discrimination.

Again, this is a very complicated subject, and I am only one trans person and one opinion. However I do believe people get stuck in that focus on dysphoria, and it’s not a healthy mindset to be in. For cis writings including trans people in their reader inserts, I’d recommend making them explicitly trans, whether it be male/female/nb, because you cannot have gn pronouns and call it a day, especially not if it’s an nb person because it’s simply not the same as gn pronouns in a fic. Cis writers tend to have a stereotype when it comes to trans people, especially on tumblr where trans men are always seen as soft twinky UwU Bois and it gets real old real fast. I cannot name a single fic I’ve read that’s had a trans reader not in a binder or on hrt. You don’t have to transition to be trans, but it would be nice to see some variation and have some guys only have top surgery or only have bottom surgery or have no surgery and be okay with it. Medically transitioning is by no means the be all end all but every trans experience is unique and it’s very bland to see the same trans story every time you read a reader insert. I am of course speaking from the point of view of a trans man, I can’t imagine what it must be like for trans women because those fics are even less common!“

5. Okay what was it you said earlier about stuff you’d come back to?

Glad you asked!

Look, I’ll be straight up and honest, this is something that’s hard to put into words because it’s such a nebulous experience, and I don’t know how to describe it to cis writers but.

Sometimes the way gender neutral, nonbinary, and trans male readers are written really comes across like the author wrote a female reader and just went back to change the pronouns.

The reason why it’s hard to explain at times is because there’s nothing overt, but there are specific patterns in the way authors write reader characters and their love interests, like... female-coding.

The way the reader-character interacts with the world, the way they’re written interacting with characters, the way characters are written viewing them, the way their body language is described- things that, if you take a step back, you’d realize “oh, I wouldn’t write a cis male character like this.”

Again, it’s... really, really hard to put into words, but it’s a pattern my partner and I have both noticed that’s made it hard to enjoy a lot of trans/nonbinary reader fics. The issue isn’t that the reader-character is feminine in any way, the issue is that that’s all anyone ever writes them like.

Reader-insert fics already have a very homogenized experience of “reader-character is extremely passive in their narrative and has little agency in their story other than to exist alongside a canon character for him to eventually fall in love with.” Even in fics where the reader is explicitly a cis woman, there are these... unnecessary references to her being female that, to me, just seem to serve no purpose.

This is. Incredibly just Me saying this here. But it’s genuine, from someone who hasn’t actually Had A Gender in over a decade now: Is... being a woman really that prominent in cis women’s lives? Is it really that big a part of who you are? I want to know, because it’s so wildly different for me, and if I’m going to give advice on how to write reader-characters of other genders, I kind of. Really need to have that one ironed out.

If your gender plays a large role in who you are and your perception of yourself: that’s great, chase your bliss, it’s good to know who you are and what you’re comfortable with! It’s just a theme I keep seeing in reader-inserts that... takes me out of it? Someone whose gender is featured so heavily in their identity and the way they interact with the world might not realize that, say, a nonbinary person, just... has a completely different relationship with gender.

And I’ll say this, too: Trans men’s experiences and relationships with their gender is also wildly different to that of a cis woman. There is overlap in some places, yes, but it is still a completely different relationship, and cannot be treated as the same.

I think this is where the problem lies, and why I never see trans woman readers or AMAB nonbinary readers: consciously or not, cis female writers write what they know, and are applying their experiences and relationship with gender to trans AFAB readers assuming it will be the same or similar enough.

I will say, as a general rule of thumb: it really is not. Do not treat it like it is, please. This is why I say to write as if gender doesn’t exist. Just write the character, write the story, and then worry about their pronouns. Don’t even think about what they look like or their voice if you find that stopping you.

Write the reader as a character, not as a woman.

Now that that’s out of the way.

6. How can I make my reader-insert stand out?

I’ll let my partner, Felix, take over for this one again:

“People write what they know so expand your knowledge by talking to others.

Reader inserts are often very passive, too. Try to have your reader become the driving force instead of letting plot happen around them. For example, try to imagine why the reader and the characters would have a reason to talk/bond, what would be reasonable motivations for the reader? Why would the characters care about the reader?

Easy ways to do this include having an already established relationship between the reader and character that you can draw from, the reader has to accompany the characters for an amount of time on a joint goal, anything other than ‘reader is sexy lamp and characters like reader because reader is sexy.’ If you’re gonna write about a one night stand, then write about a one night stand, but don’t try to shoe horn in a whole relationship.

if you’re gonna write tropes then you have to:

1) Make it your own. “School for superpowered kids” is the core of several IPs: my hero academia, Harry Potter and xmen, but all of them are very different to each other. If you’re writing for reader inserts, a common trope is ‘reader whisked away by character to start a new life.’ This trope is everywhere, and it’s fine, but art is all about that execution.Think more about why these things are happening; why is the reader being whisked away, why does the character care about them, why would they stay together after the initial danger has passed? Don’t explain it to me either, show me the events leading up to the scene you want. Don’t tell me ‘ever since character rescued reader he’s been in love with them,’ show me those events, show me the lead up, show me why I should give a damn. If the fanfic wasn’t specifically reader insert, would it still be interesting?

2) Execute your tropes well. Execution is the most important thing when it comes to art. You can have the most brilliant idea in the world but if you don’t execute it properly it’s worth about as much as dirt. A movie can have a great idea, but if the pacing is off or the lighting bad or the sound design shit it’s not gonna work is it? Best example are the original Star Wars trilogy vs the prequels, I could go on for ages about the differences between them and the behind the scenes, but the gist is that during the filming of the og trilogy Harrison Ford, Carrie fisher and mark Hamill were constantly rewriting the script during scenes to flow better and sound better, Lucas’ wife was the editor and was the reason we have those great scenes that are seared into the memory of our society.

With the prequels many people had credited Lucas as being the sole reason the og trilogy was so successful, therefore he had more free reign and bogged down the movies with things that, yes, might have been interesting lore wise, but served no purpose for the actual story. His execution was bad. Your execution of your fic doesn’t have to be on the grand scale of a million dollar budget movie, but you do have to make the effort if you want to make a good story. You wanna write a horny smut fic? Power to you, do research into bdsm and healthy safe sex practices. Go into depth about how that makes the characters feel and how it connects to them as people. You can do a fantastic character study just from bdsm practices because of how personal and intimate that situation can be. Even without hard smutty stuff you can still write a deep and personal fic about a character falling in love with the reader if you just take the time to actually develop the relationship between them.”

Phew, that was a lot. Those were really the Main Big Questions I hopefully answered to a satisfactory degree. Ask box is always open, though!