#moxiety fanfiction

[i-am-bitterly-jittery]

Devoted

Word count: 1851

Rating: Teen

Pairings: Moxieceit (Patton/Virgil/Janus), Moceit

Warnings: background violence and murder, religious imagery (written by a very non religious person who’s certain that there’s better words she could have been using but she doesn’t know them and trying to google them just gets her unhelpful Bible study websites), the inherent gay hornyness that comes from the religious imagery

~~~START~~~

When the invaders came, Virgil watched from the temple steps with the rest of the priestesses. The temple of Truth and Lies sat atop a hill overlooking the city and the sea beyond; they had seen the invaders’ ships even as the watchmen sent up the alarm. 

The priestesses watched, uncaring, as the city’s ships sank under the assault of the invaders’. They watched, unmoving, as the invaders reached the ports and descended upon the city. They watched, unaffected, as the city began to burn — their duties were to their Gods, not to the city from which some of them had been nursed. Even as citizens fled the city on foot, the priestesses of Truth and Lies watched steadfast from the temple steps. Some citizens begged to shelter in the temple, but only those who bore tokens of the temple’s Gods were permitted. 

Not until the Grand Temple of The Twins in the center of the city began to smoke did the priestesses stir. In the past, invaders to the city had left the temples untouched, fearing the retaliation of the Gods, but these invaders… they were barbarians. The temple would not keep the priestesses safe. 

Some of the priestess fled, forsaking their Gods and deciding their chances would be better as blasphemers out in the wilderness. The remaining priestesses, Virgil included, retreated into the temple and shut the stone doors. 

Inside the temple, patrons and priestesses alike rushed about in panic. Some tried to arm themselves with the ceremonial armament that normally hung from the wall as tributes from the city’s greatest warriors, some prayed at the feet of the two twenty-foot stone statues of the Gods for their delivery from peril, and some drank the sacrificial wine, fermented in the temple from the finest grapes grown in the valley beyond the temple for the Gods to enjoy as they may, hoping to be so senseless by the time death came for them that they would be none the wiser at the end. Virgil watched the blasphemy impassionately. 

Unlike most of his fellow priestesses, Virgil had been brought to the temple as a babe, he had been tribute to his Gods, and he was raised on nothing but Them. He did not try to arm himself, nor did he beg for his life or defile his Gods’ tribute, instead, he wandered deeper into the temple. He ignored the sounds of running feet and the fearful yelling and came to a halt only once he had reached the mosaic tile fresco of The Snake and The Frog, there he fell on his knees and prayed. The fresco was not generally considered to be a formal prayer site, but it was where Virgil had always felt closest to his Gods. 

He did not pray for his life, for his life was worth nothing if it was not spent in worship of his Gods. He did not pray for the city, for the city was worth nothing whether it was populated by his people or by the invaders’. He did not pray for his fellow priestesses, for they had already disrespected their Gods. 

No, Virgil prayed for the temple. He prayed that no invader would defile what belonged to his Gods, that the temple would stand no matter how much fire the invaders brought with them, that the temple would stand long after the invaders perished, whether by war or old age. 

And as the invaders reached the temple’s stone doors and began to beat on them, he continued to pray. He prayed that his Gods would always have tribute and that their cult would go on long after Virgil and the priestesses were cut down. 

As the stone doors gave and the screaming began, Virgil prayed that the beauty of the temple not be diminished as it was decorated with the blood of the slain. 

Screams and footsteps echoed around Virgil, but he did not move from his supplication. He was afraid of the invaders and he was afraid of dying, but more than that, he was afraid of abandoning his Gods. He remained, unmoving before the fresco, quiet prayers falling from his lips. 

“Well, well, well. What have we here?” 

Virgil could not stop his flinch of fear as a dark voice croaked with glee behind him, but he continued his prayers. 

“Beg your false gods for their mercy,” the invader laughed, seizing Virgil by the hair with one hand and bringing his knife to his throat with the other. “They cannot save you.”

Virgil squeezed his eyes shut and added one last prayer that his blood would only add to the fresco’s beauty, if his Gods allowed it to sully Their imagery at all. 

The screams in the temple behind him seemed to change pitch as he waited for his executioner to strike. But no strike came. 

The invader’s laughter was cut off with a strangled gasp as the knife fell to the ground near Virgil’s knees with a clatter. Then the hand untwisted from Virgil’s hair, and a body fell to the ground with a heavy thump!

Virgil’s eyes snapped open as a cool, gloved hand cupped his cheek. Before him, clad in black and yellow vestments, stood a man– no, not a man. A God. His God, to whom his life was but a humble tribute. 

His God — Janus, God of lies, secrets, and selfishness — stood before him in the guise of a half-man, half-snake. The human half of His face was all sharp angles and smooth skin as though cut from the same stone as His statue in the temple’s gallery, and the snake half of His face was decorated with a mosaic of yellow and green scales that put the fresco behind Him to shame. His human eye was brown as the bark of the trees in the forest, as the jasper inset in the temple walls, as the dirt from which all life grew, His snake eye was as yellow as the sun and almost seemed twice as bright. 

A smile graced His lips as He swiped His thumb gently against Virgil’s cheekbone. 

“As stunning as your blood would look decorating Our temple,” He said in a smooth voice that was almost as mesmerizing as His eyes and was sparked with humor and affection, the source of which Virgil could not fathom. “It would not be worth even half as much as it is coursing through your lovely veins.”

Virgil blinked dumbly, awed and confused by the emergence of his God. 

The God smiled a little wider and reached for Virgil’s hands, still clasped together in prayer, with His free hand. He pulled Virgil to his feet before snaking His arm around Virgil’s waist and pulling him against the God’s stone-like body, trapping his clasped hand between them. 

“Look at you, precious,” the God cooed reverently. “So devote, even when Death has you in Her grasp.”

A scream started just down the passageway before being cut off suddenly. Unable to help himself, Virgil tried to turn to look, but his God’s hand held fast upon his cheek. 

The God’s smile lost some of its humor but none of its affection. “Now, now, precious, Patton will be done soon and then you won’t need to worry any longer.”

None of this made any sense to Virgil, he was but a speck of dust to his Gods, something to be washed away when he became too much of a nuisance, not something to be held close and called precious. 

Janus continued to smile affectionately at Virgil and pet his cheek gently as the screams and cries died down until the temple finally sat silent once more but for Virgil’s quiet breathing. 

“I hope you’re not planning on keeping him all to yourself, love,” another voice, this one light and musical, broke the silence from close behind Virgil.

Janus held Virgil’s face fast, but allowed His own eyes to lift to view the newcomer with the same affection He had been sending Virgil’s way. 

“Of course not, darling,” He answered, rubbing His hand up and down Virgil’s spine possessively. “He is Ours after all.”

Another body, softer and warmer than Janus’s pressed into Virgil’s back. “Our most devoted priestess,” the voice cooed affectionately. “Safe in his salvation.”

“I-I didn’t ask for salvation,” Virgil stuttered quietly, afraid to contradict his Gods, but even more afraid to let them misunderstand his prayers. 

“Of course you did!” Patton — God of truth, morality, and selflessness — exclaimed, turning Virgil around in Janus’s grip. Janus allowed His hand to drop from Virgil’s face, but His other hand stayed firm around his waist, resting on Virgil’s stomach as Virgil faced His Husband. “You asked that no invader defile what was Ours.”

Patton had chosen to dress Himself in full human form and blue vestments, though His height might be pushing what man could reach on their own. He chose softer lines and a fuller form than His Husband had; His eyes sparkled blue as the ocean as it melts into sky, and were twice as deep as either. His gaze, trained firmly on Virgil despite the fact that at his back was His Husband, was full of a naked affection that made Virgil’s knees weak — not that it mattered, the way Janus held him firmly. 

“You are Ours, aren’t you?” The God asked, though He clearly already knew the answer. 

“Yes,” Virgil answered. Though the appearance of his Gods confused him, of this he was certain: he was Theirs, however They wanted him. 

Patton smiled and cupped Virgil’s face in both of His large, soft hands. “Then as long as Our cult goes on, no harm shall befall you, and as long as you are Ours, Our cult shall go on.”

“I am always Yours,” Virgil swore. “My life will always be spent in devotion to Your divinity.”

Patton’s smile grew wider, and he leaned down to kiss Virgil on the forehead. 

“Our divinity now, precious,” Janus corrected him gently, though Virgil did not understand what difference there was. 

“Our divinity,” Patton agreed, leaning over Virgil to kiss His Husband. “Yours, Mine, and Our most devoted priestess’s.”

Then He leaned down once more, but instead of kissing Virgil on the forehead, He claimed his lips instead. For just the briefest moment, Virgil worried about what His Husband would do, but Janus gently thumbed at Virgil’s stomach and rested His free hand on Patton’s hip, pulling His Husband even closer, and pressing Virgil more firmly between Them. 

Only when Patton slipped one hand from Virgil’s face and used it to hold to His Husband did Virgil allow himself to sink into the kiss, to allow himself to become lost in this new form of prayer to his Gods. 

And when Janus grew impatient and turned him to face Him once more, Virgil prayed to Him as well. 

In the temple of Truth and Lies, which no power could reduce to rubble be it man or beast or time, lived a priestess who prayed to his Gods with his every breath in every way he knew how. 

~~~END~~~

It took me a real long time to find the word “vestments” cuz I wanted the word “vestiges” which is not the same, though you can have vestiges of vestments

I’ve been meaning to write this fic for a while and last night I just went feral and didn’t sleep

General taglist

@royalty-of-all-things-snuggly @pixelated-pineapple @arsonic-knight @misunderstood-shadowling

[naminethewriter]

Monstrously Simple Days at College

Chapter Two: Platonic Cuddling at Midnight

Masterpost | Previous | Next | Ao3

Story Summary: Humans and Monsters live together in harmony and that means they all get to go to college together. Roman, Remus, Janus, Virgil, Logan and Patton are big group of friends that may be a bit chaotic with all the different monster cultures they hail from. College itself is hard too, but with them all supporting each other, it can’t be that bad, can it?

Content Warnings: None

~~*~~

“I’m sorry you have to do this…”

“Pat, I thought we got it through your thick skull last semester! None of us mind doing this with you,” Virgil sighs, pressing more of their weight into Patton behind them. They are sitting on Patton’s bed in the dorm he shares with Janus and are currently making their way through the Lilo and Stitch series.

Patton whines quietly and Virgil twists their neck to look up at him, seeing his ears pressed against his skull.

“I mean it, Pat. We all know you consider us your pack and that that means that during full moons you’re going to be a bit more clingy than usual. The others would be here too if Logan hadn’t run out of those weed things that can only be harvested under a full moon for some reason. Honestly, herbology sounds like a fucking nightmare.”

“Language! And I know you don’t mind it usually but when it’s just one of you here it gets even worse. Just the thought of you leaving the bed is making me kinda upset…”

Virgil reaches up to scratch behind his ear in comfort.

“I have no plans of getting up, I’m very comfortable where I am. Plus you’re always nice and warm. And unlike the others, I don’t need to use the bathroom as often.”

Patton’s arms tighten around Virgil slightly and appreciatively. He also nuzzles against the back of their head.

“Still, I would feel more comfortable with at least one of the others here so you can at least move around if you want to.”

“Yeah, Janus and Roman going with is still kind of stupid. Like, I get why Remus is tagging along, he’s still super attached to Logan, but I swear Janus just went along because he wants to cause some kind of chaos and Roman then decided he had to do damage control. I’m gonna text them to get their asses back here.”

“Nooooo, you don’t have to!” Patton whines, reaching for Virgil’s phone but they evade his grasp. “I don’t want them to come back just because I’m a bit clingy!”

“Oh please, Pat, it’s not bad that you have needs. And it’s not like they’re out for anything important. Logan will probably thank you later for getting them of his back.”

“Well… if you say so.” Patton’s voice is still hesitant, but his tail is wagging at the thought of at least two of his packmates returning soon.

“Aaaand Roman says he’s dragging Jan back here. Will take them at least another twenty minutes because apparently, they got separated from Logan and Remus anyway, so no teleports. But with their flying speed it shouldn’t make much of a difference.”

“What do you mean they got separated?” Patton sits up straighter, in turn justling Virgil who quickly soothes his worries.

“Everything’s fine. I already texted Logan and it seems like Ro and Jan started arguing about something so Remus and him just left them behind. They’re still on campus grounds so they didn’t think it was a big deal.”

“But it’s the middle of the night!” Patton cries, struggling to get out from behind Virgil and out of bed. Virgil quickly turns to face him, grabs his arms gently but firmly and presses him back on the bed. Thankfully, their vampire strength gives them a bit of an upper hand, though with it being a full moon, they’re sure that Patton could break free if he really tried.

“Breathe, Pat. In, two, three, four. Hold, two, three, four, five…”

Virgil continues counting until Patton’s eyes stop darting towards the door and remain locked with theirs.

“The others are just fine. Logan has protective spells up at all times and Remus can kick just about anyone’s ass. As for Janus and Roman, they’re no slouches either and are both very fast. Not to mention, they’re still on campus grounds, they’re safe.”

“Yeah. Yeah, you’re right. Sorry.”

Virgil sits back, letting go of Patton so that he can get himself comfortable again.

“Don’t apologize, Pat. You’re protective of us and that’s super sweet. And I’d love to watch you lecture the two when they get here.”

“They’re your partners though? Shouldn’t you be trying to get them out of trouble?” “Eh,” Virgil chuckles as they cuddle back up against Patton, “where would the fun in that be?”

[moonbeam-dragon]

High school AU. Virgil is a Freshman. Logan and Patton are seniors.Virgil gets left at school during the winter. He can't get a hold of his mom or dad and is starting to panic. Luckily, there are a couple more people he can rely on.

[sleepyvirgilprompts]

At some point not too long after Accepting Anxiety or possibly before it, Virgil and Patton are cuddling and Virgil, half-asleep, accidentally calls Patton “Janus”.

[edwin-payne-enthusiast]

electing strange perfections (in any stranger i choose) - Chapter 1/?

next | masterlist | AO3

Word count: 5117

Summary:

The fae world and the human world had always been mostly separate. Fae crossed between the two realms while humans remained oblivious to their very existence, and that was how it had been for centuries. But when the lines start to bleed, and humans start catching on, who's going to step in and put an end to the conflict that follows? Human or fae, fate does tend to fall into strange hands (aka, logince fae au)

((AN: this is like 60% based on an rp i did a while back on tumblr. I definitely strayed from the original storyline a lot but the idea and the characters are like… pretty similar i think. this is also incredibly self indulgent bc im a sucker for logince. enjoy :] ))

~ * ~

Humans liked to consider themselves to be intelligent. Masters of the world they lived in. They dug up coal to power their great machines, and cut down trees to put up the scaffolding for towering buildings. They sacrificed their share of the Earth for the wonders they saw fit to create, and they turned to each other with unsatisfied smiles, as if to say: ‘Look at that. Look at the greatness we have achieved’.

They never quite finished with their powerful innovations, there was always something more. Some turned to science, and quickly became bored, many claiming that we had already mastered the Earth, there was nothing more to learn. Yes, humans quickly convinced themselves that they understood most everything, and whatever they didn’t understand, well, they at least could pinpoint its existence, could say with confidence that it was infact real. Although this mindset has led to great discoveries, it is the hinderance of the most vital secrets that the Earth holds close to her chest.

Then again, perhaps it’s not always the important people making the important discoveries. After all, sometimes fate does tend to fall into strange hands.

~ * ~

Logan awoke just like he did every other morning, the smell of coffee drifting up the stairs, the sound of his mothers poorly singing along to some ABBA song, the summery morning air drifting in from his window that he always forgot to close, his homework still strewn across his desk from his late night study session. All was normal because that day was a normal day.

He got out of bed as usual, ten minutes before his alarm was supposed to go off, as he always tended to wake up earlier than he needed to. He blamed it on his circadian rhythm, and would usually bore his mothers to death with some scientific spiel whenever the topic came up, but if asked if he would set his alarm back ten minutes to compensate for it, he refused for whatever reason.

He put on his school clothes that he had laid out the night before, black jeans, a blue button up and a black tie, similar to what he always wore, formal and neat. He heard that type of clothing would get kids bullied in some schools, but he kept his head down, was quiet and polite, and his peers were always kind to him, even if he never found himself with many friends.

He brushed his hair, cleaned his teeth, made himself seem presentable, turned off his alarm once it went off, picked up his already packed schoolbag and slung it over his shoulder, before he went downstairs, everything going the way it always did. Today would be a normal day, why wouldn’t it be?

Logan’s feet had barely left the bottom step when one of his mothers swept into the hallway from around the corner. April was her name, named after the month she was born in. She often joked about her parents lack of creativity, and her surprise that her younger brother wasn’t named January. She was a shorter woman, with deep golden tan skin and kind eyes shining from behind a pair of round framed glasses. Her hair was long, dark, and curly, and her face was adorned with deep smile lines to compliment her dimples. Logan knew his mom had always been a beautiful woman, though he didn’t need to say it, his other mother, Natalie (named after nothing in particular, her parents simply adored the name), did her best to remind her wife every morning.

April walked to up to him with a skip in her step, going on her tip toes to run a hand through his hair “Oh Logan, look at you, always so professional looking. It’s high school, not a business conference you know?” she smiled fondly as she stepped back to admire her son.

“Mama, please, I have a reputation to uphold,” Logan replied, flattening down his hair. It was insatiably curly, and he always did his best to keep in neat. Just another trait he shared with his mama. People had always pointed out how similar he and April looked, ever since he was a child. April always tried to convince him that he had Natalie’s eyes, but he knew now that he was older that made no sense. Natalie, with her pale skin and pin straight brown hair, played about as much of a part in his genetic makeup as the anonymous man from the sperm bank played in his upbringing.

Logan’s almond skin, his poor eyesight, his curly, dark hair, all were traits he shared with his mama. He figured that the anonymous donor must have been tall though, as he was almost a head taller than both of his mothers, with a bit more room for maybe one more growth spurt.

“Oh please, all of your teachers already adore you” April hummed and tugged on Logan’s tie gently “At least lose the tie, it’s going to be hot today. Come on, breakfast is ready, we might even let you have two cups of coffee this morning if you promise to not stay up so late studying tonight” she said with a grin, walking out into the kitchen.

Logan followed behind her, the sounds of a familiar song filling his ears as he stepped into the kitchen alongside his mother.

‘-my destiny in quite a similar way. The history book on the shelf, is always repeating itself…’

“Waterloo? You couldn’t have picked a better song?” Logan teased lightly, immediately going to pour himself a cup of coffee.

Natalie turned her head around from where she was sitting at the kitchen bench “Excuse you young man, Waterloo is and always has been a hit” she argued back with a light-hearted tone, her voice still a bit rough from sleep..

“No, it was a hit in 1974. The Winner Takes it All is objectively a much better song, if we’re talking ABBA” Logan pointed out. Their musical debates were common in the mornings. It was all routine, his mothers put on a song, Logan came downstairs and critiqued it over coffee, rinse and repeat.

“Sorry honey but I have to agree with Nat on this one” April chimed in, sitting next to her wife “I mean, you can’t win Eurovision with a mediocre song. Besides, The Winner Takes it All doesn’t fit the morning vibe”

Natalie nodded to what her wife said, a tiny strand of her hair falling out of the tight bun it was held in “Very true. And really if we’re going to talk better ABBA songs, I’d consider Hole in Your Soul over any other song any day”

April put a hand over her heart in a dramatic fashion “Whoa hold on a second, you’re taking Hole in Your Soul over The Visitors? Now that’s crazy...”

‘-couldn't escape if I wanted to, Waterloo, knowing my fate is to be with you…’

Logan smiled a little to himself as his mothers continued to playfully bicker over ABBA. He took a sip of his coffee, drinking slowly so he didn’t burn his tongue.

His mothers had known each other for years, but for all Logan knew they could have known each other forever. He had never met two people who were closer than they were. They met in their sophomore year of high school, and Natalie proposed when they were both twenty-two, back in 1999. Of course, they couldn’t actually get married until about sixteen years later, for obvious reasons. Logan was ten at the time, he still remembered the wedding, and how much his mothers had smiled all throughout the ceremony. He was sure if he dug around in his closet a bit he could find the little black suit and tie he had worn, all dusty and stiff with seven years of no wear.

Logan eventually finished his coffee and put it down on the bench, filling his cup up again, slowly and carefully so as to not spill a single drop. Natalie looked over at Logan, not mentioning the second cup as it was merely routine for all of them by now “What’s on the agenda today Lo?”

Logan hummed, taking a sip of his coffee before speaking “I have a science project to wrap up, and then I might stay late to finish up my English essay in the common area”

“Why don’t you just come home and finish it?” April asked, tilting her head to the side.

“If I come straight home you’ll spend all the time I spend on work trying to pull me away from it, and I can’t risk that sort of distraction,” Logan answered.

April scoffed “Oh please, it’s probably not due for another month, you’re far too organised”

Natalie nodded in agreement “Yeah, you certainly didn’t inherit either of your mothers’ tendencies for procrastination”

“Well inherited procrastination or not, I’ll stay late today. What time should I be home by?” Logan asked, grabbing an apple out of the fruit bowl next to him on the counter, intending on taking it for breakfast even though he knew the chances of being able to leave the house without first eating a proper meal were slim.

“Hmm how about you be home by… now. And ditch school. And we can do something fun as a family and have a together day” April suggested, tilting her head to the side with a crooked smile.

“As tempting as that sounds-“ Logan began in a way that sounded like he wasn’t tempted in the slightest “I have a perfect attendance to uphold, and besides, I promised Virgil that I’d meet up with him to help proof read a paper for him”

Natalie sighed heavily, her shoulders slouching in an melodramatic disappointment “Oh dearest Logan, always working, never enough time for his boring old mothers”

Logan rolled his eyes in amusement, tucking the apple away in his bag to save for his walk to school “Look, tomorrow’s Saturday, we’re all free all day so we can have a together day then; we’ll do whatever you want. How does that sound?”

“I thought you had to tutor on Saturdays?” April pointed out.

“The student cancelled, they came down with the flu, or they were out of town, I can’t really remember. Either way, I don’t have to tutor them tomorrow so I’m free” Logan explained.

Both April and Natalie smiled “Well that’s wonderful! Yes, tomorrow it is, and you better not cancel otherwise you will never live it down” April warned.

“Yes mama, I know” Logan said with a fond smile, about to turn to head out the door when Natalie picked up a brown paper bag off of the counter and tossed it to him.

“Breakfast” She said simply “Eat it or I’ll come down to the school and tell them you have a doctors appointment and-“ she gasped dramatically for effect” “-force you to skip school!”

“Yes ma” Logan said, his tone exasperated but downplayed by his smile. “Love you Lo, have a good day” “You too ma” “And me?” “Yes mama, and you” “Bye Lo, have fun at school, do not work too hard today” “Goodbye”

And with that, Logan was out the door. The walk to school wasn’t a long one, and though Logan was perfectly capable of just driving to school, he enjoyed going by foot. It was good exercise and he lived on the brink between suburb and nature, so it was nice to hear the birds and see the green of his surroundings in the mornings, it helped to wake him up.

His actual school was a lot less lively than its surroundings, but that didn’t bother Logan all that much. He enjoyed school, which some people found strange, but didn’t everyone enjoy the things that they excelled at?

He walked into first period with his arms heavy with books and his bag heavy with homework, either to be handed in early or to bring up questions about some aspect of the assignment. First period English went smoothly, he handed in his annotation homework, made good progress on analysing the text they were studying (which they weren’t due to start analysing until next week, Logan just liked to get a head start), and engaged in a friendly debate about the textual meaning behind the piece they were studying, which always brought his mood up, especially considering he always had a tendency to win said debates.

Second period algebra was just as simple for him, writing examples on the board, getting extension work halfway through the class once he had finished all the other material, making notes and areas for improvement. He studied in the library during his morning break and then went straight back in for a physics class in third period.

Everything went pretty well, until fourth period biology, where he hit a small bump in the road.

The first half of the period went well, with Logan handing in one of his projects a week early, as he usually did. Although just as he was packing up to leave, his biology teacher called him up to the front, his project folder open on his desk, “All of your work is exceptional, as always Mr Sanders, however you seem to have missed a small part of the assignment”

Logan was immensely proud of his project. They had been tasked with identifying one common plant that grew in the area, and giving a detailed description on its properties, environment, cellular makeup, evolution over its existence and the like. Logan had taken great care to include every detail, so what could he possibly have missed? “Oh, my apologies sir, I wasn’t aware. I had checked and double checked my project against the instruction guide last night and found no issue, so I am curious, what did I miss?”

Logan’s biology teacher shook his head “It’s nothing major, and I won’t mark you down for it if you don’t want to go and add that now that you’ve already submitted. I’ll admit, it’s only a small detail. In the instruction guide, at the top of the page, students were asked to include either a picture or a physical example of the plant that they had selected” his teacher said, pulling out the guide and sliding it over to Logan, pointing out the part that had instructed that, “It’s easy to miss, don’t stress about it. Now, I can see that you have chosen stinging nettle, so of course I don’t expect you to go out and pick any-“

“I’ll do it” Logan said abruptly, “My apologies sir, I didn’t know that I had missed something so simple. If it’s alright, I will unsubmit my project now and I’ll bring the completed version with me tomorrow”

“Oh, you really don’t have to-“

“Nonsense, I wouldn’t want my work to be of a substandard quality. I assure you, I will have it done properly by tomorrow. Good afternoon sir” Logan said, quick to pick up his project off of the teachers desk and whisk himself out of the classroom without another word. How on Earth could he have missed something so small? He supposed he would have to put off finishing his essay that the afternoon, opting instead to take the walk into the woods at the edge of town to collect some nettle. It was fine, the essay wasn’t due for another month anyways.

When Logan sat down in the library at lunch, he was thoroughly disturbed. He still could hardly believe that he had missed something so simple, so easy. Completing the task would have taken him five minutes, and not only had he not done it, he had completely skimmed over actually doing it, he didn’t even forget, he just didn’t process the instruction.

Logan barely noticed someone sliding into the seat next to him until they cleared their throat to get his attention.

“You good there bud?” Virgil asked, seeing Logan stare off into the distance with that look in his eyes that he only got when he was overthinking something sparking a bit of concern in the older boy. “Hm? Oh, hello Virgil, yes I am perfectly adequate” Logan replied with a small nod towards his friend.

Virgil and Logan had known each other for twelve years. Twelve long years of what started out as enduring each other’s presence, to accepting it, to enjoying it. They had met in kindergarten when they were put in the same class, and forced to sit together after an argument broke out about who owned which pencil when their stationary got mixed up during arts and craft. It was some tactic to get them to get along, and for a while it didn’t work; arguments broke out every day, and many pencils were snapped in half in the process, but by the end of the year, they had begrudgingly accepted each other as acquaintances rather than enemies, and now, years down the line, that bond had only strengthened.

Virgil and Logan wouldn’t quite consider the other the only friend they had, but they would be stupid to not consider each other best friends.

Which was why Logan’s inner turmoil was more than obvious to Virgil.

“Come on, spit it out, what happened” Virgil said, dropping his bag on the floor next to him with a thud.

“It’s nothing, no time for distractions, we need to proofread your paper” Logan said, trying to grab the essay out of Virgil’s hands, not before Virgil had lifted it up and out of Logan’s reach.

“Nuh uh, nice try. You’re not getting this until you tell me what’s wrong” Virgil said, waving the paper around above Logan’s head, making the shorter boy frown at the thought of the creases the taller would be making to the paper. Much to Logan’s dismay, Virgil had always been freakishly tall, standing at almost 6’4”, towering above Logan who stood at about 5’10”. They had been the same height for most of their earlier school years, but as soon as Virgil hit the seventh grade he shot up, and ever since then he had often used his height to his advantage, and seemed to take much enjoyment out of holding things just out of Logan’s reach.

Logan sighed in annoyance and conceded “Fine. I handed in my biology project early and my professor informed me at the end of class that I had missed an instruction so it was unfinished”

Virgil blinked “And?”

“That’s all” Logan replied simply.

“That’s all?” Virgil echoed, biting back a laugh “Lo that’s no big deal, don’t worry about it. You handed it in early too so it doesn’t matter. You can just unsubmit it and bring the completed one in when it’s ready”

“I know I know, it’s just… I never miss details like that. It was such a small thing, a physical example or a picture, that was all I was missing, and the instruction was right at the top of the page and I just… missed it” Logan said, his tone suggesting that it was some crucial thing that he had skimmed over and not just a small part of his project.

“Y’know what I think Lo? I think you’re overworking yourself” Virgil said, resting his chin in his hands, keeping his paper pinned under his elbow on the table so Logan still couldn’t get to it “You need to take a break, step away from schoolwork for a bit. You’re already like months ahead of everyone else on classwork. It couldn’t hurt to stop for just a little while, clear your head. I mean, no one in a right state of mind freaks out about missing a simple part of their project, do they?”

Logan sighed heavily, wanting to argue but figuring that it was no use, Virgil had always been the stubborn type, and in some way he was correct. “I suppose you’re right, maybe I am in over my head. I’ll try to step back a bit” Virgil smiled, pleased “Good, you need it specs”

“If you say so. Now, you wanted me to proofread your paper?” Virgil raised an eyebrow amusedly and shook his head, to which Logan huffed in annoyance “Certainly your work doesn’t count as my work, I’m simply going to proofread it-“

“Nope, you’re taking a well-deserved break and that includes all forms of work including proofreading. It’s in the fine print of our agreement, and I would recommend you read it but I’m sure that counts as some kind of proofreading so no, don’t do that” Virgil said, snickering at his own joke.

Logan just rolled his eyes “You are incorrigible”

“You’re very welcome L”

The two boys sat like that for a while, engaging in a bit of friendly back and forth. It was all familiar for them, after all it wasn’t the first time that Virgil had insisted Logan took a break. He always found some way to overwork himself, through school, personal projects, or anything else that required his attention for extend periods of time. Of course, it’s not as bad as it used to be. Virgil remembered the times when he wouldn’t see Logan at all outside of classrooms for days, or sometimes weeks on end, always too busy studying at the library or finishing the mountains of extra work he had asked for in each subject. He remembered how irritable he always was, how tired he always looked. Over time, things changed, and it was better now, but it always felt like Logan was at risk of falling back into that spiral, constantly teetering on the edge. Virgil wished that Logan could eventually find some way to just step back from reality, even just for a little while, not get so caught up in school.

By the time they were supposed to head off to their last class of the day, both of the boys were in good spirits. A lively conversation mixed with a casual debate usually did wonders to lift their moods, so they both parted ways to their classes with smiles and promises to organise plans together soon.

Logan was feeling better, that little weight on his shoulders felt smaller, everything felt more manageable now that he was no longer so worked up over something so unimportant. He walked into his ancient history class with a lighter feeling in his chest, ready to get the class done and be finished for the day. He sat down in his usual seat, pulled out his notebook and pens, and started taking notes as the class began, writing down the work and answering any questions that the teacher asked. It was all normal and completely usual once more.

Logan often had a habit of getting too into his own head about minor things, especially when it came to matters of academics, something that he took very seriously. What had started out with him doing accelerated math and advanced reading in elementary school had led to him being the top of his year, winning awards for essays he submitted to competitions, and having several, rather persistent college scouts trying to persuade him into submitting an application. Even though he was at a point in his senior year where potential colleges was something that students were beginning to think over, Logan had already planned out his course and top picks for colleges, all of which he was certain he would be accepted to, and his mind was rarely changed. He liked to have things planned out in advance after all. At the very least, he was modest about it. In fact, his mothers seemed to brag more than he did about his numerous achievements. He would always claimed to be embarrassed whenever they started to boast about him, but in reality, he didn’t mind too much; it was nice to be recognized. The end of class rolled around quicker than Logan had expected, the teacher signing off with giving them a hefty homework task to complete over the weekend, leaving students groaning and mumbling in discontent while Logan just jotted it down in his notebook.

After placing his things neatly in his bag and staying back to ask his teacher one question about the homework, he left the classroom, heading towards the school gates. On a normal day he would walk home with Virgil, since he only lived about a five minute walk away from his home, however Virgil was not waiting for him at the gate today. He had messaged him a little while ago, letting him know that he was going to stay back in the library to proofread his paper that they didn’t get to read at lunch with some of the student volunteers there. Logan was very tempted to join him in the library, but he knew Virgil wouldn’t let him stay and would bring up the whole ‘overworking’ thing again, so he kept on walking, past the school gates, onto the street.

At about fifteen minutes into his walk, the lack of the usual conversation he would be having with Virgil began making things a little dull, leaving the occupation of his mind to his thoughts. At any one time Logan was thinking of many things, and this was no exception. He was thinking about how best to start his ancient history homework, if his mothers had brainstormed any weekend plans, what his grade would be on their recent math quiz, a rather tricky chemistry question that had puzzled him for quite some time, and unsurprisingly, his biology project. Even though he tried to ignore it, he couldn’t help that prickly feeling under his skin when he thought about it being handed in incomplete.

Logan stopped in the middle of the path and looked around. A decent distance from him, yet well within his line of sight, he could see the tree line that separated the suburbs from the woods that all the infrastructure was built around. Logan had heard about developers fighting over the woods for a long time, wanting to build apartment blocks, but the land was protected by the government under an environmental act; Logan was pretty sure it was a national park, or at least something of the sort.

He stayed looking at the tree line for a few moment, hesitating on a decision. He knew that Virgil warned him against worrying over the project too much but surely it couldn’t hurt. It shouldn’t take long to find a sample anyways, stinging nettle was rather common around these parts, and taking a short detour was surely better than leaving his biology project unfinished. Without another thought, Logan diverted from the sidewalk and started heading towards the woods. It was a short walk, mostly downhill, so it didn’t take long, and once he passed the tree line, the shade provided by the canopy was a welcome protection from the warm afternoon sun.

The air was cool and damp from the recent summer rains, and the leaf litter crunched softly under his feet as he walked further in, his path illuminated by the few rays of afternoon sun that snuck in through the canopy. Logan took a short moment just to look around and appreciate it all. He had always had a soft spot for nature, ever since he was a small child. His mothers were obsessed with showing him environment documentaries and watching how excited he would get over the pretty plants and cool fauna. Eventually, as he got older, that excitement turned into a genuine passion and curiosity. The natural world was certainly considered to be one of his personal interests.

He was interrupted from his thoughts by a sudden strange feeling that burrowed it’s way into his chest. He didn’t know where it had come from or what exactly the feeling was, all he knew was that suddenly, his body felt a little lighter, and he felt the sudden urge to keep walking forward. For a moment he thought it was like he was being beckoned, but that was an illogical thought, it was just some strange instinct. All thoughts of the strange feeling were forgotten when he finally stumbled upon what he had been looking for; a patch of stinging nettle, well he supposed it could hardly be considered a ‘patch’, as it was arranged in a rather strange manner, growing in a perfectly neat circle on the ground in front of him, with little white flowers blossoming below each leaf. In the middle of the circle sat a smooth stone, with little tufts of moss growing off it. Logan admired it for a few moments, almost like he couldn’t quite take his eyes off of it. The feeling in his chest ached softly, he ignored it.

He thought it was strange, for the nettle to be growing in such a perfect circle like it was. Perhaps someone had come along and planted it like this, or maybe it was some wonderful coincidence. He wasn’t entirely sure, but for some reason it captivated him.

After a minute or two he caught himself getting distracted by his thoughts and snapped himself out of it. He knew collecting a sample of this stuff would be tricky, he didn’t want to get stung, and he didn’t really have the right equipment for the job. He considered turning back and waiting for another day to return when he had something safer to carry the plant with, but quickly dismissed that thought, he was here now, he might as well get it done. Besides, he had told his teacher that it would be completed by tomorrow, and he intended to live up to that claim.

Crouching down, Logan put his hand in the hem at the bottom of his shirt and used it to safely pick a piece of nettle, tearing off a few leaves near the bottom so he could let go of his shirt and hold it by the stem. He observed the piece he had taken, it was adequate, but the leaves were small and the flowers were a little wilted, not the most pristine specimen. With a slight frown, Logan looked back at the circle, and a stem of nettle across from him on the other side of the circle caught his eye; large green leaves, a tall stem, numerous little white flowers, it would do perfectly.

The young man gingerly stepped into the circle, careful not to tread on any of the other bits of nettle, and crouched down inside of it, reaching out to pick the nettle from the base of the stem to avoid getting stung. He smiled a bit, admiring it once it was in his hand as he felt that strange feeling in his chest soar. It would work perfectly, he was sure to get a good mark on his biology project, now that everything was accounted for.

Logan had time for only one more thought, that being that he was suddenly feeling a bit lightheaded, before everything suddenly went dark.

[starlit-roman]

What your favorite sanders sides ship says about you in my opinion

I got this idea from @sandersontheside

Logince: Your favorite episode is why do we get out of bed in the morning and you question that too. You’re a fan of those red and blue haired character anime ships, and let’s not mention how much you love enemies to lovers. I feel like you like spaghetti with a shit ton of Parmesan, and sprite or Pepsi.

Logicality: You like sweet, wholesome ships the most and have probably either written a fan fiction about, read a fan fiction, or have thought about them baking cookies together. Also for some reason I feel like you like John Mulaney

Analogical: You like angst, not a crazy amount but you like to dip your ankles in it. Speaking of dip you probably either really like ranch or bbq sauce. And your favorite squishmallow is the bat one.

Loceit: You’re either the most chaotic person I will ever meet or you’re scarily chill about everything. You like it when all sense of right and wrong leave the room and just pure chaos despite how chaotically chill Logan and Janus are. You’ve definitely committed arson, and you’re a fan of tin cans and rainbows.

Intrulogical: You’re special, with love. I bet you watch doctor who while deepthroating packets of fun dip, sweet tarts, and/or hot tamales, I don’t have much else to say (I like this ship btw)

Royality: Opposites attract isn’t a thing that even registers in your brain, and despite what I want to think you’re probably the friend who corrupts the brains of your innocent friends and tells them about god knows what. If that’s not the case though you are the innocent friend who has surrounded themselves with not very innocent people. You like pasta with cumin. You also really like blueberries, soy sauce, and bluey.

Prinxiety: You’re correct. You prefer Ryan Gosling over Ryan Reynolds and you hate honeydew. You also probably have social anxiety.

Roceit: You like longer slow burn fanfictions and not just one shots, that along with enemies to lovers and a lot of tension. You’re definitely a maximalist when it comes to your room and you love rupauls drag race.

Moxiety: You’re a really sweet introvert and you like romance movies with happy endings. You probably like Mac Demarco and Arctic Monkeys and you like the scent of vanilla.

Moceit: (Kiss me) You really like stuffed animals and just fuzzy things in general. You’re a dog person but you like more cuddly cat-like dogs. You also like tomato soup.

Intruality: You’re super chaotic but super sweet, probably an Enfp or Entp. You like pickles and skunks and peanut butter cookies and cars 2.

Anxceit: You’re favorite social media is tumblr and you miss MySpace. You love hoodies and sweaters, your favorite season is winter, and you really like old artwork. You’re also really good at makeup, especially eye makeup

Dukexiety: You’re probably super all over the place and your rooms a mess but you know where everything is. You also really like snake plants and spiders

Dukeceit: You love the whole “He’s an idiot, but that’s my idiot” thing about this ship. If you have a roku it’s not set to the default theme and you probably like 90s-00s hiphop and you despise when your bed has crumbs in it.

Remrom: …

[analoceits]

sometimes im like "wow. its basically just analoceit lol. im not even that much of a multishipper tbh. its just those thre-"

and then later i shoot up in a cold sweat like "i need to write 2000 words of moxiety fanfiction right now. moralogince is my new otp 2 and i need to tell everyone. dukeceit is actually the best thing and im crafting fifteen essays. logan x orange side fucking WHEN. i need logan to get his chaos boyfriend to his strict vibes. remy needs to date all of them in the messiest way possible."

[sandersshiping]

Tags if you're looking for something in particular

Content

Fanart

Fanfiction Prompts

Fanfiction

Moodboards

Incorrect Quotes

For Ships with characters from

Sanders Sides

Cartoon Therapy

Thomas's Shorts

List of ships sorted by character (will be updated as more gets added to this blog)

Ships involving Character Thomas

Thomas/Nico - Karrot Kings

Thomas/Janus -Thomceit

Thomas/Patton -Patmas

Thomas/Virgil -Thomxiety

Thomas/Remus -Intrumas

Thomas/Roman -Romthom

Thomas/Logan -Lomas

Thomas/Remy -Thomsleep

Thomas/Emile -Thomile

Thomas/Roman/Janus -Roceitmas

Thomas/Roman/Patton -Royalimas

Thomas/Roman/Logan -Logincemas

Thomas/Roman/Remus -Roceitmas

Thomas/Roman/Virgil -Prinxiemas

Thomas/Virgil/Patton -Moxiemas

Thomas/Virgil/Logan -Analomas

Thomas/Virgil/Remus -Dukexiemas

Thomas/Virgil/Janus -Anxceitmas

Thomas/Janus/Patton -Moceitmas

Thomas/Janus/Remus -Thomceitmus

Thomas/Janus/Logan -Loceitmas

Thomas/Remus/Logan -Intrulomas

Thomas/Remus/Patton -intruthomality

Thomas/Logan/Patton -Logicalimas

Thomas/Remy/Virgil -Thomsleepxiety

Ships involving Remus

Remus/Thomas -Intrumas

Remus/Virgil -Dukexiety

Remus/Janus -Dukeceit

Remus/Roman -Remrom

Remus/Patton -Intruality

Remus/Logan -Intrulogical

Remus/Remy - intrusleep

Remus/Janus/Thomas -Thomceitmus

Remus/Janus/Roman -Remroceit

Remus/Janus/Logan -Intruloceit

Remus/Janus/Patton -Intrumoceit

Remus/Janus/Virgil -Anxceitmus

Remus/Virgil/Roman -Intruprinxiety

Remus/Virgil/Thomas -Dukexiemas

Remus/Virgil/Patton -Intrumoxiety

Remus/Virgil/Logan -Intruloxiety

Remus/Thomas/Roman -Remromas

Remus/Thomas/Patton -intruthomality

Remus/Thomas/Logan -Intrulomas

Remus/Logan/Pattton -Intrugicality

Remus/Logan/Roman -Intrulogince

Remus/Patton/Roman -Intruroyality

Ships involving Roman

Roman/Logan -Logince

Roman/Virgil -Prinxiety

Roman/Thomas -Romthom

Roman/Janus -Roceit

Roman/Patton -Royality

Roman/Remus -Remrom

Roman/Thomas/Janus -Roceitmas

Roman/Thomas/Remus -Royalimas

Roman/Thomas/Logan -Logincemas

Roman/Thomas/Patton -Royalimas

Roman/Thomas/Virgil -Prinxiemas

Roman/Virgil/Patton -Anaroyality

Roman/Virgil/Logan -Analogince

Roman/Virgil/Remus -Intruprinxiety

Roman/Virgil/Janus -Anaroceit

Roman/Logan/Patton -Royalogicality

Roman/Logan/Janus -Roloceit

Roman/Logan/Remus -Intrulogince

Roman/Remus/Janus -Remroceit

Roman/Patton/Janus -Royaliceit

Roman/Patton/Remus -Intruroyality

Roman/Patton/Thomas -Royalimas

Ships involving Patton

Patton/Logan -Logicality

Patton/Roman -Royality

Patton/Virgil -Moxiety

Patton/Thomas -Patmas

Patton/Remus- Intruality

Patton/Janus -Moceit

Patton/Logan/Roman -Royalogicality

Patton/Logan/Janus -Lomoceit

Patton/Logan/Virgil -Analogicality

Patton/Logan/Thomas -Logicalimas

Patton/Logan/Remus -Intrugicality

Patton/Logan/Janus -Lomoceit

Patton/Virgil/Roman -Anaroyality

Patton/Virgil/Thomas -Moxiemas

Patton/Virgil/Janus -Anamoceit

Patton/Virgil/Remus -Intrumoxiety

Patton/Janus/Roman -Royaliceit

Patton/Janus/Remus -Intrumoceit

Patton/Janus/Thomas -Moceitmas

Patton/Remus/Roman -Intruroyality

Patton/Remus/Thomas -intruthomality

Patton/Roman/Thomas -Royalimas

Ships involving Logan

Logan/Virgil -Analogical

Logan/Remus -Intrulogical

Logan/Janus -Loceit

Logan/Roman -Logince

Logan/Patton -Logicality

Logan/Thomas -Lomas

Logan/Patton/Janus -Lomoceit

Logan/Patton/Thomas -Logicalimas

Logan/Patton/Roman -Royalogicality

Logan/Patton/Virgil -Analogicality

Logan/Patton/Remus -Intrugicality

Logan/Thomas/Janus -Loceitmas

Logan/Thomas/Remus -Intrulomas

Logan/Thomas/Virgil -Analomas

Logan/Thomas/Roman -Logincemas

Logan/Roman/Janus -Roloceit

Logan/Roman/Remus -Intrulogince

Logan/Roman/Virgil -Analogince

Logan/Janus/Remus -Intruloceit

Logan/Janus/Virgil -Analoceit

Logan/Virgil/Remus -Intruloxiety

Ships involving Virgil

Virgil/Roman -Prinxiety

Virgil/Logan -Analogical

Virgil/Remus -Dukexiety

Virgil/Janus -Anxceit

Virgil/Patton -Moxiety

Virgil/Thomas -Thomxiety

Virgil/Remy

Virgil/Remus/Janus -Anxceitmus

Virgil/Remus/Roman -Intruprinxiety

Virgil/Remus/Logan -Intruloxiety

Virgil/Remus/Patton -Intrumoxiety

Virgil/Remus/Thomas -Dukexiemas

Virgil/Patton/Janus -Anamoceit

Virgil/Patton/Roman -Anaroyality

Virgil/Patton/Logan -Analogicality

Virgil/Patton/Thomas -Moxiemas

Virgil/Patton/Logan -Analogicality

Virgil/Janus/Roman -Anaroceit

Virgil/Janus/Thomas -Anxceitmas

Virgil/Janus/Logan -Analoceit

Virgil/Thomas/Roman -Prinxiemas

Virgil/Thomas/Logan -Analomas

Virgil/Logan/Roman -Analogince

Virgil/Remy/Thomas -Thomsleepxiety

Ships involving Janus

Janus/Roman -Roceit

Janus/Remus -Dukeceit

Janus/Logan -Loceit

Janus/Virgil -Anxceit

Janus/Patton -Moceit

Janus/Thomas -Thomceit

Janus/Patton/Logan -Lomoceit

Janus/Patton/Remus -Intrumoceit

Janus/Patton/Thomas -Moceitmas

Janus/Patton/Roman -Royaliceit

Janus/Patton/Virgil -Anamoceit

Janus/Logan/Thomas -Loceitmas

Janus/Logan/Roman -Roloceit

Janus/Logan/Virgil -Analoceit

Janus/Logan/Remus -Intruloceit

Janus/Remus/Thomas -Thomceitmus

Janus/Remus/Virgil -Anxceitmus

Jannus/Logan/Roman -Roloceit

Janus/Thomas/Virgil -Anxceitmas

Janus/Thomas/Roman -Roceitmas

Janus/Virgil/Roman -Anaroceit

Janus/Roman/Remus -Remroceit

Ship involving Orange

Ships involving Remy

Remy/Thomas -Thomsleep

Remy/Emile

Remy/Virgil

Remy/Otto -Remo

Remy/Remus - intrusleep

Remy/Virgil/Thomas -Thomsleepxiety

Ships involving Emile

Emile/Remy

Emile/Thomas -Thomlie

Ships involving Otto

Otto/Remy -Remo

also huge thanks to @thomas-sanders-shipname-glossary this would have taken so much more time without their blog!

[edupunkn00b]

B - A pairing you initially didn’t consider but someone changed your mind

F - What’s the longest you’ve ever been in a fandom

K -Say something nice about someone in any of your fandoms

Have fun! 🥰🥰🥰

Thank you so much for the Ask, Nici! :D

B - A Pairing I Didn't Consider At First

I had a very different answer for this before this morning. Originally, I might have said Intruality or Moxiety (honestly, any Patton ship, but especially those two) were difficult for me to really imagine. Then tiny stories and snippets won me over. But then…

After a little Discord chat with a wonderful friend and writer (Hi, Raven!) they completely sold me on Losleep. They helped me finally see the beauty and balance of them and… Oh, dear. Is this a fresh rarepair journey I'm on now?

F - Longest I've Been in a Fandom

Has to be Star Trek. It was my first convention, my first actual fanfiction was a Star Trek OC fan fic about Vulcans. And I'm still obsessed (even if I'm a little behind on the latest series.

I could argue Star Wars is my first, but Star Wars is more my mythology. My third word was Artoo, fourth was Threepio (theepio) so…

K - Say Something Nice

I'm going to fawn over you, Nici. Your stories are full of so much heart and I re-read them more often than you could ever know. And you were one of the very first Fanders who talked with me about the stories I was writing and you made me feel welcome and encouraged me to keep writing also far, far more than you could ever know.

Here's just one of Nici's amazing stories:

Here's the Ask these letters are from:

[prince-rowan-of-the-forest]

Blog Intro

Hello all! Welcome, come take a seat, have a cup of tea, relax, enjoy your stay in my corner of the internet!

| Fic Masterlist | Ao3 | Art Commissions | KoFi | My Ask Blog |

----

Hell's Belles/SaSi AU Masterpost

Ribbons and Rainstorms Masterpost

A Swallow's Symphony in Spring Masterpost

---

Wanna send me writing or art prompts/ideas? You're very welcome to! Feel free to throw it at me in the ask box and I'll do my best!

Ship wise, my favourites are Roceit, Prinxiety, Anxceit, Logicality, Intrulogical or Intruality!

-I would rather not write logince or Analogical, I just don't ship them too much to write them, sorry guys -w-

-No romantic Moxiety, Dukexiety or Royality, no RemRom (creativitwins is fine though!!!!)

About me:

Name: Rowan

Pronouns: Any

18+

I'm colourblind and children scare me.

Fandoms:

Main fandom:

- Sanders Sides

Other fandoms:

- She-Ra

- ATLA

- BBC Ghosts

- Hermitcraft/Life series SMPs

Tags:

I'm not hugely reliable with tags, so apologies in advance for that, but I do try my best -w-

- 'rowan rambles’ for when it's just me talking nonsense

- ‘rowans fantasyAU’ for my Sanders Sides fantasy AU

- 'Darkside!Roman' for my Darkside Roman AU

- 'rowan arts’ for all my arts (only new stuff will be tagged with this though)

- 'rowans writings’ for my fanfiction

Before You Follow:

- This blog is a safe space for people of every gender, sexuality, race, ethnicity, etc

- While this blog is not pro-ship, it is also not anti-ship. I don't want to see any discourse, arguments or hate here. While I absolutely do not personally support ships like Remrom, this blog is not the place for arguments. I am neutral.

- I do not hesitate to block people who i believe to be bots, or people who are assholes in general.

- I like posts to save them for later and reblog art/posts I find funny. I don't reblog stuff that often mainly because I don't really scroll a lot, not because I'm not reblogging stuff I come across.

[i-am-bitterly-jittery]

On Death's Doorstep (pt 41/53?)

[<<First],,,,[<Prev],[Next>] [ODD Masterlist]

Word count: 1612

Rating: Teen

Pairings: parental Moxiety, past Virgil/omc

Warnings: past abuse, implied abuse, current torture, blood, nonlinear narrative, psychic powers

~~~START~~~

Something about the overhead light felt like needles slowly piercing his skin. The light didn’t respond to his will, if anything, it seemed to get sharper when he tried to bend it away from himself. It grated at his nerves, keeping him too keyed-up to drop fully into unconsciousness, but not so aware that he was fully conscious either; he was drifting in a haze of slow-burning agony.  

He couldn’t teleport either. Every time he’d tried it had felt like he’d slammed his head into a brick wall.  

It was a trap. Of course it was a trap — he’d known it was a trap.  

He didn’t even get to see his dads. He didn’t know if they were ok.  

The warehouse looked empty when he entered it, but he knew his dads were close — in a basement by the feel of it. He was careful, creeping through the building as quietly as he could, but when something heavy slammed into him, he was caught completely off guard.  

The force of the hit sent him careening into some of the factory’s machinery. He tried to teleport away, but someone had set up a field around the warehouse, blocking his escape; he did teleport twenty yards away though, hoping to catch his as-of-yet unseen adversary off guard. This field wasn’t very sophisticated, and the teleportation left a metallic taste in his mouth.  

He tried desperately to scan his surroundings, but the warehouse was so dark that he couldn’t see anything other than vague dark shadows, none of which were person shaped. Out of nowhere, a tendril of electricity shot out, missing his arm by mere inches as he quickly sprang away. The whips kept coming as the crackle of electricity dimly illuminated the new supervillain — Whiplash, he thought he remembered the news saying.  

Hoping to use the darkness to his advantage, he concentrated an orb of light near where he thought the villain’s eyes were. The whips stopped as the villain stumbled back, though weirdly, he didn’t cry out in surprise of pain.  

He was about to press his advance when he was suddenly hit by a sharp pain to the back. He collapsed on the floor, paralyzed but conscious.  

“There now,” a voice said as a new assailant leaned over him. “That wasn’t so hard.” 

The new adversary reached for him, but he managed to teleport once more.  

“Fucker!” He heard the voice mutter to itself before addressing him specifically. “You can’t get away! That toxin will keep you from moving, and the Holder will keep you from teleporting out!” 

‘Holder’? He thought, mentally shaking his head. Is that the best they could come up with? 

He couldn’t stand, his field of vision was painfully limited to what he could see while his cheek was pressed into the floor; he could teleport, but not to true safety; he was pretty sure he could still bend light and shadows, but that might do him more harm than good while he tried to hide.  

He could hear footsteps around him, but the reverberation throughout the warehouse made pinpointing where they came from impossible. He was just about to teleport again when a whip of electricity suddenly hit its mark.  

He was out before he really knew what hit him.  

The door to his cell slid open and he tried to drag himself into something more resembling consciousness. He heard the clicking of heels as a figure approached him, but his mind was too clouded to really see what was coming.  

“Well, well, well.” The voice sent chills down his spine and the resulting jolt of adrenaline cleared Virgil’s vision and thoughts. Dr. Agon stood before him, her typical predatory grin gracing her ruby lips. “It’s been too long, Knightcaster, we’ve been worried about you.” 

Virgil didn’t trust his voice, so he said nothing.  

“You know who else we’re worried about?” Agon continued, seemingly satisfied with Virgil’s lack of response. “Patton. Won’t you tell me where he is? He must be so scared and alone.” 

“…fuck…you,” Virgil managed to rasp out.  

“Fine,” Agon’s eyes flashed dangerously. “We’ll do this the hard way then, but don’t say I didn’t warn you. I don’t like having my things stolen, Knightcaster.” 

“G’ ‘t…hell…” 

Agon’s smile widened slightly. “Come here 1013.” 

The door opened again and a gaunt figure slunk in. If it weren’t for the bright pink hair — slick with grease as it might be — they might look like the girl from The Ring; they wore a dirty smock that might have once been white with long lank hair falling in front of their face. They looked so completely different that it wasn’t until just before their hand plunged into his chest that Virgil remembered that he’d met this person before.  

It was an unseasonably warm October day when Knightcaster was sent downtown to bring in a supervillain with some kind of mind-manipulation powers. She had apparently been forcing people to withdraw money from an atm when some cops had reported to the scene — no sooner had those cops arrived than they were flapping their arms and clucking like chickens.  

The supervillain had called herself Ebony, ironic, given how deathly pale her skin was, almost as though she was glowing. Her pink hair fluttered around her in a wind that didn’t seem to exist, it was the same electric pink as the blood that dripped more heavily from her hands with every person whose soul she reached into.  

As soon as she saw Knightcaster she took off running in the opposite direction. She barely made it three steps when she collided with Knightcaster’s chest, the hero having teleported into her path.  

She reared back with a snarl and plunged her pink hand into Knightcaster’s chest.  

Virgil was thrown forcefully from the memory. He was no longer in that room with the sharp lights, or at least… it didn’t look like he was in the room, it looked like he was in a space that was both devoid of and saturated with color. Standing across from him, looking slightly more like herself in a black MCR shirt, black spandex shorts sticking out from underneath a pink and black plaid miniskirt, and fishnet stockings — though still lifeless and defeated — was Ebony.  

“This will be easier if you cooperate,” she croaked, her mouth never moving.  

“I haven’t been feeling very cooperative lately,” Virgil shot back.  

“Where’s the target?” Ebony asked, an image of four-year-old Patton appearing in the space between them.  

“I’ve never seen that child before,” Virgil lied.  

Ebony cocked her head and the void around them began shifting, Virgil’s own memories shaping the surroundings materializing around them.  

Virgil wrenched the memory to the side and his old apartment he’d lived in with Orin materialized. Cracked countertop and all.  

“No,” Ebony said, sounding bored and listless, not at all like the villain Virgil had fought before.  

The apartment began to shift again, so Virgil threw all his mental weight against the flow. Evading psychics like this had been a part of his training, and he was certain that if Ebony wasn’t as unwell as she was that his time — hours? Days? Weeks? — in the sharp lights would have weakened him below her abilities.  

The child shifted and changed with the surroundings, and when the shifting stopped, a very different child stood between them.  

The new — old — child was five. He was going by a name that wasn’t quite his own. He wore a bright pink shirt that he only ever wore in tandem with his overalls, though he didn’t know why yet. The shirt, Virgil knew, had pink rhinestones spelling out the word “Princess” hidden beneath the bib of the overalls. The overalls had holes worn into both knees as this boy had a penchant for adventuring with his dads. His hair had been recently shorn short after a mishap with a classmate and some gum; he liked it better this way.  

Around them was a house that hadn’t changed much in twenty-one years — though maybe it had, Virgil hadn’t seen it in so long. There was a television across from a comfortably worn couch; bookcases taking up one wall, half filled with books, and half filled with various DVDs and video games. The coffee table in front of the couch was completely clear of dishes or trash in a way it almost never was.  

“No.” Ebony’s voice was harder now. She tried to shift the scene again, but Virgil gritted his teeth and kept the surroundings from changing.  

The boy became taller, older, he was wearing a hoodie now, and clutching a worn copy of Dante’s inferno in his hand.  

“No!” 

Ebony yanked more forcefully, and their surroundings began to shift. Virgil pushed against it as hard as he could, but it almost wasn’t enough.  

The scene solidified into Virgil and Orin’s living room, an adult Virgil was curled up on the couch, holding a week-old Patton in his arms. At the time, Virgil had been amazed by his perfect tiny son. He still was.  

He would do anything for that kid.  

He kicked back against Ebony and the scene melted around them.  

Virgil opened his eyes to the numbing pain of the sharp lights. Before him on the ground, lying in a pool of toxic pink blood, was Ebony. Her mess of hair had parted and Virgil could see her pitch-black eyes staring listlessly ahead of her.  

“Shame,” Agon sighed, completely bored. “Don’t worry, Knightcaster, we have more ways to get you to talk. R&D’s going to be very interested to see how well their toys work.” 

As her heels click-clacked out of the room, Virgil’s head hit his chest. 

~~~END~~~

Hehehe >:3<

ODD taglist:

@royalty-of-all-things-snuggly @pixelated-pineapple @arsonic-knight @misunderstood-shadowling @lost-in-thought-20 @remy-the-lemon-berry @jinxcrafter @apinkline2715 @gothfoxx @donutsarepartybagels @xoaningout @meganmoneky14 @lunatatic

[aliennopossumm]

Stay With Me, Hold My Hand

Pairing: Moxiety Warnings: Pushing yourself too far despite pain, medicine, anxiety Genre: Hurt/Comfort Characters: Patton, Virgil Character notes: autistic nonbinary Patton (he/they), autistic nonbinary Virgil (they/xe) Summary: Virgil has a flare up, but still tries to be a helpful partner Wordcount: 3236 words, 18932 characters

Happy late 2 years, @andromedaspace <3

Virgil’s eyes slowly opened, staring towards the open door of their bedroom. It was odd for the door to be open; they were consistently insistent on shutting all windows and doors before falling asleep. They rolled over, going to put an arm around Patton but collided with pillows and stuffed animals instead; through half-lidded eyes, xe was able to process their absence. A slight dread filled them - for the few months they had shared an apartment, they had formed a routine on days Patton worked. Virgil would almost always wake up first, making the two a breakfast and preparing Patton with a packed lunch for the day. It would not take long for Patton to wake up naturally, enjoying breakfast with their husband as the two watched television together. They would let Virgil know what needed to be done for the day as they finished the food, sharing a kiss before leaving for work. 

But Patton wasn’t here. Slowly, Virgil went to get out of bed, feeling xyr bones ache. A sigh escaped their mouth, hoping Patton was at least still home as xe went to make the bed. Despite the pain, Virgil begrudgingly finished the task - it wasn’t to the best standard, not in the slightest, but it was passable as a made bed. They blinked harshly, attempting to wake themselves up faster and grabbing their phone, walking out of the bedroom door and stumbling down the stairs. Entering the living room, Virgil noticed the time on a clock - it was past ten now. There was a sense of guilt starting to build up inside of xem due to the fact xe was unable to prepare breakfast and lunch for them, let alone say goodbye to their partner. With a half-hearted attempt to push these feelings away, Virgil checked to see if Patton had at least texted xem a goodbye. To xyr delight, he did! From the contact “Patt <3”, a message read “Good morning darling! I hope you enjoyed the lie in. And there’s something on the counter for you! Love you ❤️❤️”

Knowing that Patton would be working at this hour, xe didn’t worry too hard about texting back immediately, smiling at the hearts and going to check what Patton had left for xem. Within a second of entering the kitchen, Virgil was able to smell their surprise - a plate of home-baked cookies sat on the counter , alongside several dishes needing to be cleaned. Though it would have been over an hour since they were removed from the oven, the scent of freshly baked goods lingered around the room, filling Virgil with slight happiness as xe removed the cling film and took a cookie to eat as breakfast. Even if xyr bones still ached, they felt a moral obligation to clear up the space they lived in, moving the dishes from Patton’s baking and last night's dinner closer to the sink. Xe started to run the water, chewing on the baked good happily. Chocolate melted inside their mouth. It was still warm. Virgil turned off the tap once the sink was filled, leaning over to more effectively clean and silently cursing xemself for being so tall.

It didn’t take long for xem to finish, placing the last plate into the cabinet. Their pain became almost unbearable now, especially in their back. Xe took another cookie to eat, taking a bite and then letting the cookie sit between their teeth as they scrambled into the medicine cabinet to find the ibuprofen. A tall glass was filled with water once the last crumb of cookie was swallowed. Afterwards, they took the pain relief with the liquid - probably more water than necessary, but xe was extremely anxious about the pills being stuck in their throat. The glass was quickly cleaned and put back into the cabinet. Virgil removed their phone from their grey sweatpants pocket, opening their text messages and clicking on the most recent conversation, Patton’s.

“ty for the cookies patt <33 i did the dishes, is there anything else that needs to be done?”

Virgil hardly expected an instant reply, though they stayed looking at the phone screen for a few more seconds. Xe pushed their arms above their head, extending their legs as they stretched and cracking at least three bones in the process. It felt nicer - the pain was still apparent, but the stretch and medicine would hopefully be helping. Without a reply from their partner, Virgil decided to make their way back upstairs and get dressed out of pyjamas, as that had been their primary clothes of choice for the past couple of days. Reentering the bedroom, xe made xyr way to their personal closet, looking through the array of black clothing with only several splashes of other colours mixed in. Thanks to the winter cold, xe looked mostly towards the collection of sweaters separated from the rest of their clothes. After several seconds of consideration, they changed into a large, purple turtleneck, putting their previously worn clothes onto the chair that accompanied a desk - coldness still engulfed them. Inspecting the remainder of cosy clothes they owned, their mind finally landed on an oversized cardigan, unsurprisingly in black. Slipping it over their turtleneck and doing up the buttons, xe then moved towards their jewellery stand. Without a second thought, they took their two favourite necklaces; one being a simple chain necklace, and the other being a gift from Patton, a photograph of him inside a heart-shaped locket. 

Once the jewellery was placed around their neck, Virgil started to walk to the small bathroom opposite their room. Absent mindlessly, xe took their black eyeshadow and started to smear it onto and below their eyelids with a finger, guided a little by the vitiligo that surrounded their eyes. Once there was enough makeup caked onto their face to positively resemble a raccoon, white liquid eyeliner was messily applied, clearly uneven. They didn’t have enough spoons to care. Without bothering to apply any lipstick, as that would require removing their snakebite rings, xe quickly started to brush their teeth, though it wasn’t nearly for the suggested amount of time- they spit the waste into the basin, looking up to the mirror. They flashed a small smile and revealed sharp, now clean, teeth. Quickly fixing their split-dyed black and purple hair, Virgil determined their appearance good enough, making their way back downstairs and rechecking their phone as they did so. Despite not expecting a reply from Patton, the lack of one did bring down xyr mood by a smidge. 

Two and a half hours passed, and Virgil’s phone finally buzzed with a notification. For these few hours, xe was unable to do anything productive due to their fluctuating pain, deciding to simply watch something on TV and switch between the same several apps on their phone. Excitedly, xe unlocked their phone once they realised it was Patton, and tapped onto the notification from their partner. “I can’t think of any other tasks! Just rest today <3” Virgil pouted a little at the reply, texting back to say that is all xe has been doing. Xe then took a quick, slightly blurry, selfie, commenting on how they did makeup to not feel completely lazy. Patton happily liked the message, replying back with a gay comment and a photo of themselves - they sat in the backrooms whilst wearing their work uniform, their blue dyed hair tucked into a hat sporting the store logo to get past the dress code. Their lunch sat in front of them, a half-eaten sandwich and a bag of chips, both from a vending machine, as well as a large cup of coffee. The sight of said meal made Virgil feel quite guilty, as they were the one to usually prepare Patton’s lunch. He was fully capable of crafting a home made lunch, but it was something he disliked doing.

“you shouldve woken me up to make u lunch >:c” “I wanted you to sleep in! You stayed up late last night” Virgil wasn’t able to argue with that fact, since it was simply true. Xe had stayed up until 2am, insisting on finishing all the tasks that needed to be completed. “i guess soooo” Both partners continued to talk for the next twenty or so minutes, Virgil’s social battery slowly recharging at the relaxing conversation. No topics were serious, Patton talking about the customers that he had served, and Virgil talking about what they had seen on television, or something xe saw mentioned on social media. Eventually, Patton did have to go back to work, saying goodbye and sending heart emojis. Reluctantly, Virgil sent them a message back, adding too many hearts. Xe missed them, maybe a little too much.

The remainder of Patton’s shift left Virgil in bored loneliness. Though it took a couple more hours, once xe received the text that xyr partner was finishing up his shift, they became ecstatic - not only would Patton be returning, but this would mean that dinner would have to be made, giving Virgil back xyr self-assigned purpose of taking care of Patton. Xe finally got off their ass, walking to the kitchen to start preparing dinner so it would hopefully be completed by the time Patton came through the door. Due to their lack of energy, xe landed on just making some box pasta, filling a pot with water and putting it onto a boil. As the water started to heat, small bubbles forming, Virgil wandered around the kitchen, grabbing the remainder of the ingredients and placing them next to the plate of cookies. They took their third cookie of that day. Humming softly to xyrself, Virgil looked towards the clock, trying to do half-accurate maths in an attempt to calculate what time Patton would be arriving home. From the simple mathematics, xe was able to assume that their partner would be home in twenty five minutes or so.

Surprisingly, Virgil was almost spot-on for once, as the aforementioned person entered the apartment twenty three minutes later. By now, Virgil was almost fully immersed in their cooking, wearing large headphones that blasted xyr playlist loudly, resulting in an inability to hear their surroundings. Noticing this factor, Patton walked behind their unexpecting husband, wrapping their arms around xyr waist, as well as leaning their chin onto xyr shoulder. Abrupt contact always took Virgil by surprise, resulting in them jumping a little bit - once xe realised who it was, xe relaxed, leaning xyr head back. As Patton was able to hear the previously mentioned music through the headphones, they gently removed one earcup, calmly asking xyr to pause the song. The shorter did as xe was instructed, using their free hand to temporarily stop the playlist. “G’evening to you,” Virgil smiled softly, fangs showing through lightly. “Good evening to you, too,” Patton placed their hand over Virgil’s, assististing them in stirring the food. “How’s dinner coming along?” “Going well!” Xyr attempt of not being flustered was a failure, a slight blush spreading over their brown skin, “how was your last shift?” “It went well, it wasn’t too busy! How have you been, Vee?” It was quickly clear the question made Virgil somewhat uncomfortable, xyr smile fading a little, “mhm… y’know.” Patton was able to pick up one this almost immediately, developing a skill of being able to read Virgil’s true feelings like a book. He held xyr closer and kissed their cheek. “Do you wanna talk about it?” There was a slight hesitation, but xe nodded, quietly telling Patton to go change out of their uniform first. They agreed to this, making their way upstairs as Virgil added the finishing touches to the food, letting anxiety stir in their brain. 

Several minutes later, Patton returned, wearing loose white shorts as well as one of Virgil’s sweaters - a black jumper with a large skull and crossbones in the centre. Xe turned their head, blushing slightly - the sight of their partner wearing xyr clothes never failing to fluster xem. After a second of hesitation, xe turned their whole body to face the blue haired person, opening xyr arms towards the general direction of xyr partner. Happily obliging, Patton wrapped their arms around Virgil, holding them with hands stroking at the back of their head, “hey honey. What’s wrong?” Virgil clearly tensed up, “I missed you… a lot. I felt kinda… useless without your instruction.” Xe admitted softly, “I didn’t like our routine being broken, ‘nd I didn’t like that I couldn’t kiss you goodbye.” “Oh, gosh. I’m so sorry love, I wouldn’t of done anything like that if I knew it would upset you,” Patton held them closer, “not in a million years.” Sadly, Virgil placed xyr head on their chest, looking up to them through cloudy eyes, “you promise?” “Pinkie promise.” The shorter nodded, nuzzling closer and mumbling how adorable Patton looked in xyr clothes, resulting in the latter giggling slightly and thanking his husband. He kissed their forehead several times, gently suggesting to xem that they should eat dinner in bed that night, ensuing in Virgil gladly agreeing to this deal. Xe opens a cabinet, unsheathing two bowls whilst Patton collects a tray and some cutlery, making sure to acquire the forks with rubber grips. Touching metal was a texture Virgil hated. 

Whilst staying close together, the two walked upstairs before entering their shared bedroom, slipping underneath the sheets with slight awkwardness, not wanting to spill the food on the light blue fabric. Patton set down the large tray that spreads across the pair's laps, followed by Virgil placing down the bowls. A lighthearted movie was put onto the television, and the two started to eat their meal in a comfortable silence, refusing to leave more than two inches between them. Only a handful of minutes passed before Patton yawned widely, blinking harshly and leaning their head on Virgil’s shoulder.  “Is someone tired?” xe cooed softly, smirking at the small whine xe got as a reply, “you’ve had a long work day, darling.” “It was a normal length shift,” Patton mumbled in slight embarrassment, a blush spreading across their tan skin once Virgil pressed a little kiss to their freckled cheek.  “You always work harder than most, though,” xe commented, using one hand to lift their fork, and the other to gently play with Patton’s hair. They couldn’t dispute this, leaning into the hand with a giggle and continuing to eat themselves.

Several more minutes passed. Patton was almost finished with their bowl, once again yawning before the fork could reach their lips. Virgil moved their hand from his hair to his shoulder, placing an arm around the taller one. The smaller leaned closer, gently asking if they should go to bed now - xe had finished their meal moments prior. A whine emerged from the tired person. “Mmhm? What’s up?” Virgil asked. “We gotta get ready for bed. You still got makeup on!” Alike to Virgil’s strict morning routine, Patton had formed a night time routine, and became uneasy at this pattern being broken.  “Alright, love,” xe pressed a kiss to Patton’s face, removing xemself from their bed and helping the latter person up. After handing over the tray to the other, Virgil went to remake the slightly messy bed as Patton made their way downstairs to the kitchen.

These two tasks did not take long to complete, Virgil and Patton eventually meeting back up in the bathroom, sharing a quick kiss. With a slight blush spreading across their face, Patton took both of Virgil’s hands and looked down to meet their eyes, gently asking if they could take of xyr makeup for xem as they slowly turned more red; Virgil happily accepted the offer. With a small giggle, Patton took a makeup wipe, holding their face in one hand, almost as if they were the most precious thing in the world, and gently sweeping away the eyeliner and eyeshadow with the other. The gentleness of their hold and how ticklish the touch was caused child-like laughter to spill from Virgil’s mouth, wiggling xyr entire body to stim. It did not take long for Virgil to become clean faced once again, beaming up to Patton, and laughing once again when the former pressed a kiss to xyr lips. Xe lingered on the kiss, breaking it after a couple of seconds before handing Patton his toothbrush and taking their own. 

Once their teeth were clean, Patton sleepily smiled towards Virgil, wrapping their arms around the smaller person and yawning once again. They nuzzled their face into the crook of their neck, letting out a small noise similar to that of a purr when their partner started to stroke their hair. “C’mon, starlight, it’s time for bed,” xe cooed softly, continuing to pet their hair. The comment elicited another whine from Patton. “Noooo… you gotta get changed,” they murmured, using one finger to half-heartedly play with one of the necklaces xe was wearing. Virgil chuckled softly, “I can’t get changed if you’re clinged to me.” Though xe said this, xe did not make any attempt to remove their partner from xyr body. A feeble noise came from Patton once again, burrowing their face further into Virgil, and weakly attempting to remove the necklaces xe was wearing, despite leaning on the jewellery. This just coerced another laugh out of Virgil, removing Patton’s arms from xemself and gently picking them up bridal style. The action caused Patton to squeal loudly, leading their head underneath Virgil’s chin and wrapping his arms around Virgil once again for extra support. Though Patton was almost a head taller than the latter, xe enjoyed working out specifically for the purpose of lifting xyr partner.

It took several seconds of fiddling with Virgil’s necklaces as xe brought the two back into the bedroom before Patton realised which ones xe was wearing - the heart-shaped locket with a photo of himself inside. They let out a small giggle, commenting to Virgil it was the one they had made for xem for their one year anniversary. “I know, Patt,” Virgil set them down gently on the edge of the bed, going to take both necklaces off, “it’s definitely my favourite necklace I’ve ever had.” Virgil continued xyr actions nonchalantly, placing the necklaces back on the stand and turning back to Patton - he was squealing into their hands, moving their legs up and down in excitement. With a small smile, Virgil kissed their partner’s forehead, repeating their compliment and stimming alongside him by twisting xyr hands. “You wanna get change now?” Patton suggested, starting to calm down a little. Virgil nodded, giving Patton one last kiss before removing the cardigan and sweater and placing them on their desk chair alongside earlie’s clothes, deciding that was an issue for tomorrow Virgil. Xe grabbed a dark blue sweater and slipped it on, as well as a purple-patched black hoodie, as Virgil was always seemingly cold. 

Giving Patton one final kiss, Virgil climbed into bed and carefully pulled him next to them. Xe gently removed his glasses, placing them on the bedside.. The shorter grabbed the blanket, tucking both of them in and snuggling close to xyr partner. “Patt?” Virgil spoke softly, a hint of anxiousness in their voice. “Mh?” “Will you be here when I wake up?” “I will, love.” “Mmhm…” Virgil looked away from Patton, “promise?” “Pinkie promise,” Patton pressed their heads together, sharing one last kiss and exchanging goodnights. 

[subtlereferencetomyinterests]

An Open and Honest Conversation About Our Feelings

Ao3,  MasterPost

Relationships: Moxiety, blink-and-you’ll-miss-it Roceit and Intrulogical.

Warnings: Food mention, all sympathetic sides, swearing, crying, hurt/comfort, excessive fluff and somftness. 

Word Count: 1,779

Virgil woke up at 12:00PM dull every day, because there are no rules in quarantine and fuck you. And due to the fact that all of his fellow sides continued to maintain ‘reasonable’ sleep schedules (nerds), he was almost always the last awake. Today was seemingly no exception, as Virgil trudged down the stairs with a yawn to find his family long done with breakfast.

 Janus was the first to register his presence, curled up in the corner of the sectional with Roman. 

“There’s something breakfast-adjacent left for you in the kitchen,” he informed with a mischievous look at the trait beside him.

“We were working with what we had! I’m sorry I’m not a master chef like Dad.” Roman argued, prompting Logan to peek his head in from the kitchen. 

“The more you call Patton that, the more I worry that it’s some kind of complex.”

He ducked into the other room before Roman could effectively throw a pillow at him. 

“Remus is a terrible influence on you!” 

There was a shrill laugh from the kitchen. 

“Damn right I am!”

Virgil shook his head at the interaction and contemplated going right back to bed. There was something bugging him, though. 

“So where is Pat?”

“He wasn’t here when we came down. We decided to let him sleep in. Totally not like he needs it,” Janus said idly. 

That on it’s own would be fine (he really did need a day off), but Patton was asleep later than Virgil? At the very least it was weird. But nobody else seemed particularly concerned about the side, and Anxiety wasn’t always the best judge of what was and was not worth freaking out over. He pushed it out of mind and went to find something to eat. Patton was probably fine. Probably. 

It was 3:00pm and things were not fine. No one had seen a trace of Patton all day. After surmising that all of the idiots Virgil inhabited a brain space with weren’t correctly worried, he took matters into his own hands. He glared at his best friend’s door for a good time before he finally caved and knocked, hoping for nonchalance (how do you knock nonchalantly? Probably not like that, dude). After all, maybe Patton really had just overslept. For eight hours. Yeah. 

There was a slight gasp from behind the door. Virgil felt his stomach drop and listened closely for a response. 

“Who is it?” Morality’s voice was barely audible, a rasping and raw croak. He very clearly hadn’t been getting any sleep, let alone extra. Virgil placed his hand on the door.

“It’s- it’s me.” 

No response.

“Can I come in?”

There was a beat, and then the lock clicked open. Anxiety took a steadying breath before entering Morality’s room, carefully closing the entryway behind him. His eyes widened at the scene before him.

Patton was laying on top of the covers in his bed. His eyes were puffy and red-rimmed, not to mention so unfocused that you’d think that nobody was home behind them. Tears tracked down his face and turned his complexion worryingly red, a contrast to the gray of his cat sweater. 

“...Pat?” Virgil whispered. Patton tilted his head and attempted to smile at him, which only served to be more heart-wrenching to see than the dull upset that previously encompassed his expression.

“Hey, Virge. What’s up?”

Virgil snorted, but there was no humor in the sound. 

“That’s what I wanna know,” he sat on the edge of the bed, maintaining a respectful distance, “C’mon, you can talk to me.”

“...Can I?”

The question was nearly silent, but Anxiety couldn’t have missed it in a thunderstorm. The trait blinked in a mix of concern and confusion.

“Uh, yeah? I mean, I won’t make you, but you’re always trying to talk me down when I get upset, or whatever. That’s what friends are for, right?”

Patton pushed himself up, leaning back against his pillows.  When he looked at Virgil again, he didn’t pretend to smile. 

“You don’t have to do this.”

“What?”

“I- I know that I’ve been a lot lately. I know you need space right now, and I don’t want you to feel like you have to be here for me. I’ll be okay, it’s just one of those days- you know?” 

Virgil’s stomach sank as realization dawned on him. 

“What are you talking about?” he needed to hear it. 

“You- well- you kinda… snap at me? Whatever I say always seems to be… the wrong thing to say. I’m sure you have a reason for being upset with me, though! And you don’t have to tell me what it is, either,” Patton kept his eyes down as he spoke, “It’s fine, really!”

Anxiety didn’t know what to say. Or maybe he didn’t know what not to say, because there was so much that he should be saying. He could see his friend- his best friend, always there for him even when it was excessive- trying not to cry again. It hurt to look at, it was heartbreaking to look at in a way it really shouldn’t have been. 

His mind flashed with all the times he’d berated Patton, or shut him down, or just brushed him off- and wasn’t not being listened to exactly what made him treat Morality worse in the first place? How hadn’t he noticed before?

Oh god, Virgil had been quiet too long and he still had no clue what to say. This was why talking about emotions wasn’t in his department!

Virgil twisted his fingers in his sleeve as an idea formed. He inched a little closer to Patton, trying to will away the nervousness and regret that creeped in him so he could focus. Patton watched him from the corner of his eye as Anxiety took his hand and entwined their fingers. 

The moral trait looked up at him with scores of conflicting emotions flitting across his face. Virgil outstretched his other arm, an offering that he rarely gave to anyone and one he almost never gave to anybody other than Patton. 

The side threw himself into Virgil’s arms without hesitation, hiding his face in the fabric of his hoodie. Virgil wrapped his arms around Morality’s shaking shoulders and held him close.

“I didn’t-” his voice cracked. Shit, try again.

“You’re amazing, Pat. I’m so sorry. I wasn’t mad at you, like, not really.”

Patton’s head was resting on his collarbone. He took deep, shuddering breaths as his shaking abated. Virgil continued.

“This is all my fault, I should have just talked to you-”

Patton shook his head sharply.

“Me feeling bad wasn’t ‘cuz of you. It happens. And you did talk to me about what was wrong, I’m the one that didn’t listen-”

“I didn’t listen either, I just brushed you off! I made you feel like I didn’t want to be around you!”

“That’s exactly what I did to you! T-The first part.”

“It’s different-”

Patton cut him off with laughter, his eyes crinkling up at the edges. Virgil was only surprised for a moment before he cracked up too, letting the situation really sink in. How were they both so dumb?

A few times over they stopped, looked at each other, had another bout of giggles, and had to calm down again. Patton had gradually moved so that he was sat on Virgil’s lap, which certainly didn’t help alleviate the giddiness in his chest. 

“I’m really bad at this,” Anxiety said, sliding his arms down to hold around Morality’s waist.

“At what?” 

“Don’t know. Talking about stuff.”

“Me too. Don’t tell anybody though, I have a reputation.” 

Virgil gave another laugh and rested his chin on Patton’s head. 

They breathed.

“I’m tired, Vee.” 

“Same.”

“No, I meant... emotionally.”

“I know what you meant, Pat.”

Without another word, Patton pulled the both of them down to lie on the bed. He kicked his feet under his comforter and muttered that ‘a nap might help anyway’, and ‘would you stay? Please?’, and there wasn’t a chance that Anxiety could say no to that if he wanted to (which he did not). 

They exchanged some more whispered conversation while wrapping themselves with blankets. As the minutes passed, Virgil couldn’t help focusing on the way his friend’s arms tightened around his waist, or the way he laughed into his shoulder and pressed somehow closer. Virgil’s heart picked up- he didn’t like physical contact on the best of days, and this was more than he could ever remember enduring. The strange thing this time was that he wasn’t uncomfortable with it, no, he felt safe and warm and cared for and so so so-

Oh, fuck. 

“-irgil? Virgil?” 

“Sorry- yeah?”

Morality pulled back a bit. Virgil hoped to God that he wouldn’t dwell on the zoning out. Thankfully, he seemed to have something else on his mind.

“Thank you. For everything. This is just what I needed.” 

Patton was watching him with just an impossibly sweet expression. Virgil felt a spike of something- bravery, stupidity, recklessness, whatever you wanted to call it- in his chest. He couldn’t not say those three little words, not for another second. 

“I love you.”

Patton smiled so wide it looked painful, laughing giddily.

“I love you, too!”

“No,” immediately his fear was back tenfold and this was an awful idea, “I- I meant like, ro-”

“I know what you meant, Virge,” Patton said softly, looking amused and oh-so smitten. Virgil swallowed, pressing their foreheads together. His face was on fire and his chest hurt and his throat was dry but he couldn’t help smiling back at his friend- best friend- boyfriend?- his Patton.

The Heart tilted his head forwards a bit, bumping their noses together.

“Can I…?”

Virgil nodded quickly, accidentally shifting the trait’s glasses. Patton giggled, removing them and placing them on the bedside table before bringing his hands up to cup Virgil’s face and resuming their position. Gently- achingly gently- he pressed their lips together. Anxiety felt himself melt. The kiss was soft and sweet and cautious; it felt hours long and too short at the same time. When they broke apart, Patton looked at him like he’d hung the stars in the sky (Virgil was sure that his expression was much the same, but he wasn’t particularly worried about his reputation at that moment). 

“Thanks,” Patton said once more, laying his head back down on Virgil’s chest. The trait grasped for some response that could possibly articulate all that he was feeling, but by the time he opened his mouth, Morality was already asleep. With an amused huff, he followed suit and got some much needed rest.

@shrimp-crockpot

[echooo78]

Pairing: Moxiety

Warnings: Mentions of hospitals, crying. But don't worry, it's actually super fluffy!

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Patton sat in the Hospital waiting room, waiting for Virgil to be done with his surgery. After what felt like forever they finally call Patton in to see him. He walks into the room and sees Virgil sitting in a chair smiling softly.

"You can take him home now, but you will need to keep a close eye on him. The medicine might make him loopy and emotional and might cause him act differently than he normally would." The doctor says

"Ok, thank you sir!" Patton says walking over to Virgil. "Hey buddy, ready to go home?"

"I feel funny Pat," Virgil giggles as Patton helps him to stand up. Together they walk out to the car with Patton practically carrying Virgil. When they get to the car he helps him into the passenger seat and buckle his seat belt. The drive back home went by quickly with Virgil giggling periodically over random things.

*******

When they get back home Patton walks around the car to help Virgil out.

"Let's walk in side Virgie," He says trying to help pull him to his feet.

"Nooooo," Virgil says dragging out the word.

"Why not?" Patton asks and Virgil bursts into tears. "Baby, what's wrong?" He ask rubbing his back.

"I-I-I just love y-you so much! And you are so nice to m-me! And you are r-really p-pretty!" Virgil sobs.

"I love you too stormcloud."

"C-carry me?" Virgil asks calming down slightly.

"Of course cookie," Patton says pulling him into his arms bridal style.

"My name shouldn't be cookie," Virgil says after a few seconds.

"Why not?"

"You should be cookie, you're the one that smell like cookies."

"Ok Virgil," Patton says smiling at him. He walks in silence for a few more seconds, Virgil snuggling into his chest when Virgil speaks up again.

"Hey Pat?"

"What is it sweetheart?"

"I love you so much,"

"I know, I love y—"

"NO!" Virgil cuts me off. "You don't understand! I love you so much! You are so amazing and bubbly and nice and pretty and sweet and all of the good words in the entire dictionary!" Virgil says crying again by the end of his little speech.

"Hey it's ok, Love! I love you too!" Patton says as he walks into their bedroom and set him on the bed. "Can you tell me why you're crying?"

"Because you are so cool and I'm the luckiest person in the whole wide world 'cause you're my boyfriend." Virgil sniffles.

"That's where you're wrong," Patton says booping his nose and trying to ignore the blush that is heating up his face, "I'm obviously the lucky one because I have you as a boyfriend. Now let's go to sleep, Stormcloud."

"Ok, but only if you give me cuddles," Virgil demanded, already almost asleep.

"Of course."

Patton quickly changes into his PJ's before helping Virgil into his. When they are both in more comfortable clothes, Patton pulls Virgil closer to him while they lay down.

"I love you Virge," Patton whisper as Virgil’s eyes shut and his breathing almost immediately starts to even out.

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[starlightinhumanform]

On Your Parade

Fandom: Sanders Sides

Ship: Romantic Moxiety 

Summary: Patton was ecstatic when his best friend excepted an invitation to go out on a date with him. Nothing could bring him down- not even his roommate running off for the weekend with his car. But when he nearly loses Virgil, reality throws things back into perspective.

Warnings (in order of strength): Description of Car Accident/Wreckage, Mild Injury, No one dies but there is some discussion of death. Please tell me if there’s anything I need to add.  Genre: Hurt/Comfort, Angst, Fluff, Human (College) AU

 A/N: Writing this was like trying to move into someone’s apartment while they broke up with me. I kept showing up with my little cardboard box of plot and this story would just frown and tell me things weren’t working out between us. Patton’s characterization is something I struggle with a lot and one of reasons I wanted to write this was to challenge myself (I hope I got it right!!). That being said... I’m very proud to have finished it and I hope you all enjoy! Love you all 🖤✨

Ao3 Link    Fic Masterpost    Fic Request Info

Patton smoothed the creases out of his shirt for the thousandth time, gripping the hem at the bottom. He tried not to glance out the window again, but his eyes kept drifting that way.

Outside, the dusty asphalt that ran in front of his apartment building was darkening as a light drizzle began falling. But the street remained empty. A car drove past; and kept driving until Patton couldn’t see it anymore.

He couldn’t decide if the buzz jumping around inside of him was excitement or anxiety. Maybe it was both. He just needed to find something to do, something to distract him. There was no reason for him to be this amped up. He needed to calm down, act normal, be cool-

And he was staring out the window again. The street was still empty. Still no Virgil.

Maybe it made sense for Patton to be so jumpy. After all, this was their first date. But they had known each other for years. They had met in their first class of their freshmen year. Two mutually lost children amongst a hoard of what appeared to be competent adults, they had clung to each other- and hadn’t let go since. Patton had lost count of the coffee shop study sessions, late-night Denny’s raids, and art gallery visits they had taken together. To anybody else, they had dating for the past three years.

But no, because it had taken Patton a year to realize why he blushed when Virgil waved at him across the street or why he was filled with so much pride when he was able to make Virgil laugh, or why getting a text from him was somehow better than getting an email saying class was cancelled. Then it had taken him another two years to get the courage to say anything.

Patton wanted everything to be perfect. He wanted Virgil to be dazzled, but most importantly, he wanted Virgil to have a good time. There was nothing Patton liked more than to see that smile break across Virgil’s face like a California sun after a week of rain.

Unfortunately, things were already off to a not-so-perfect start. The weather had been gloomy for the past week and didn’t show any sign of clearing up. It didn’t help that Patton’s housemate had randomly decided that she needed to take a road trip in their shared car. (Patton had never regretted anything more than his decision to share a car. The split payment was hardly worth the prevailing smell of sage and vegan pizza in his only vehicle). That meant Virgil had to pick up Patton- on the date that Patton was taking him out on.

Ugh. The whole thing was messy and somewhat awkward and not at all what Patton had pictured. But Virgil had been happy to go along with the whole thing, adorably bouncing on the balls of his feet. Patton was still in shock that Virgil had even said yes. He definitely hadn’t wrapped his head around how happy Virgil had seemed, excited even about picking Patton up.

Patton flopped backwards onto his bed and squeezed the nearest pillow to his chest. Thinking about Virgil- about his crooked grin, the way his eyes looked nearly violet in sunlight, the way he was always trying to introduce Patton to obscure bands, how his laugh seemed to come from somewhere deep in his chest and bubble up so that when he laughed it was like he was laughing with his whole being, just everything about him- made warmth well up inside of Patton. It was bright and it made his chest feel tight and the only thing he could do was grin and kick the back of his heels against his mattress. Patton was notorious for crying over anything remotely cute and he was supposed to keep his composure around Virgil? Ridiculous.

Patton lay there for a minute- or two or three, smiling so hard his face hurt. So maybe he was an actual adult who did adult things like pay bills and do laundry and buy vegetables; he still got flustered as easily as one of the blushing dames from the old movies Virgil liked to critique.

Patton checked his phone for the time. Virgil had agreed to be at his house at 5:00; it was 4:57. That gave Patton exactly three minutes to get himself together. It probably wasn’t going to happen but he had to give it a try. He was so scared to come off too strong and scare Virgil away. After all, Virgil didn’t even know Patton liked him that way until a week ago.

He sat up and took a deep breath. Two minutes. Just be normal- he’d been holding that act for years, he could keep it up for just a little while longer.

A minute ticked by, and then another, and then five or ten more and then roughly an entire geological eon on top of that. Patton found himself flat on his stomach on his bed, staring at his phone like if he really focused on the screen in front of him, he could ignore the worry that was quickly growing in his chest.

Another car rumbled by his window and Patton jumped up. Still no sign of Virgil and it was 5:15- far later than Patton had ever seen Virgil arrive to something they had agreed upon. Virgil had a reputation for showing up to things exceptionally early (he had gained infamy amongst professors for being the only student who had ever shown up to an eight a.m. class twenty minutes before it began) and Patton couldn’t clamp down on the doubt that was rising up inside of him.

Virgil didn’t forget things. He would worry and procrastinate and claim he forgot things- but it wasn’t something that actually happened. If Virgil was late, that meant he didn’t want to be there. Patton abandoned staring at his phone and began picking at the edges of his cuticles. It was something Virgil always got on his case about, but Virgil wasn’t there at the moment to say anything. What if he didn’t actually want to go out with Patton? What if he hadn’t actually been that happy and Patton had just imagined it all? What if he had just said yes to be nice? What if this had all been a mistake and their friendship would never be the same again?

Patton glanced back down at his phone. He wished he could call Virgil; he wanted to hear his voice, he wanted to say I’m so so sorry for messing up everything we had and I want to take it all back. I would eat all my words if it meant we could just be friends again. But no. Because Virgil hated talking on the phone. Because it would only make things worse. Because it was too late and he couldn’t possibly fix everything now.

Hey, he did say yes, though. And Virgil rarely lies. The immortally optimistic portion of Patton’s thoughts tried to show him a glimmer of hope. For once, it held some logic. Patton had rarely seen Virgil lie- the stress of keeping a story running and his worries of people finding out usually outweighed what he could gain from lying. Anyways, he wouldn’t lie about something this big. Would he?

Patton’s eyes had glazed over, far too focused on all of the thoughts swarming through his head to actually be able to see anything around him. His attention was brought snapping back to reality as his phone buzzed to life, flashing Virgil’s name.

He fumbled to answer quickly, hoping his voice didn’t sound squeaky as it scrambled out of his mouth like an overly-excited puppy, “Hey!”

“Can you come pick me up?” Virgil’s voice was rough and forced; he pushed the words out so quickly Patton could barely understand what he was saying.

“Wait, what? What’s going on? I don’t have a car remember-“

“There was an accident.”

The world dissolved into white noise. Patton couldn’t see anything, all of his senses cut off. His blood was rushing in his ears but he could feel it pounding all the way to his fingertips. He couldn’t remember how to breathe; he could only focus on the heavy rasps coming from Virgil across the speaker.

Suddenly time rushed back into place and all of Patton’s fear with it, “What happened? Are you ok? Did anyone get hurt? Who did it?”

“I- I just, I don’t- I think-“ Virgil stuttered out his words, breathless.

A sick heaviness settled into the pit of Patton’s stomach. He shouldn’t be the one freaking out right now, he couldn’t be- Virgil needed him.

Patton sighed, cutting off Virgil who still hadn’t managed to complete a sentence. He tried to keep his voice as low and level as he could despite the urge he was getting to run out of the house and find Virgil as fast as he could, “No, no. I’m sorry. It’ll be ok. I just need to know where you are and I’ll come get you.”

“It was- no, wait. Except then-“

“Virge. Street names. That’s all I need. Don’t worry about anything else.”

“Right. Sorry. Uh-,” For a second Patton couldn’t hear anything from the speakers except muffled footsteps, “Garnet. Garnet Street. And Maple.”

Patton just blinked for a moment, “But that’s just a few streets down from me. I’ll be there in just a second. Just- hang in there, ok?”

He didn’t wait for a reply. By the time it had probably taken Virgil to realize he had hung up, Patton was already pounding down the stairs. He ran out the door without a second thought, dismal weather forgotten as he sprinted off the porch and down the street.

Raindrops splattered against his bare arms and his breath steamed as it collided with the cool air around him. He didn’t notice and he didn’t care. His mind was completely occupied as he tried to remember how the local roads were stitched together. Under normal circumstances, he knew them as well as the veins that wove through his hand (probably better because while he did spend a good amount of time walking around, it had been quite a while seen he had memorized the back of his hand).

He heard the wreckage before he saw it. Or rather, the lack of sound. There were no birds, no crows cawing their dislike of the rain. Just the heavy silence of fog and the tick of cooling metal.

Patton slowed to a walk. He didn’t want to turn the corner. He was so scared of what he would find. His ears strained to pick up Virgil’s voice, but he couldn’t hear him at all. Patton knew Virgil was alive- he knew, he had just been on the phone with him- but he couldn’t shake the feeling that something was going to be horribly wrong. The thought of Virgil being hurt pushed him back into a sprint.

The scene was a mess. The twisted hood of Virgil’s car lay at the top of the street, a good hundred feet from the actual vehicle. The front was crushed like an aluminum can someone had decided to step on. Patton couldn’t tell if the clouds rising from it were smoke or steam or maybe a combination of both.

Patton didn’t know he could run so quickly- one moment he was somewhere by the top of the street and the next he was in the middle of the wreckage, flying past patches of broken glass and twisted metal that reached towards the sky like demented sunflowers. Patton couldn’t stop if he wanted to.

Virgil was hunched over on the curb; his knees tucked to his chest, his head hung, and his hands clasped over his bent neck. Patton couldn’t see his eyes but he could bet they were squeezed shut, just trying to block out the world around him.

Patton was a very careful person. All of his usual gentle hesitation was thrown out the window. He could hear the glass crunching beneath his feet, but he felt nothing of the shards digging into his shoe soles. The fumes of the wreckage fell heavily into his lung but he didn’t notice the burn it left with every inhale.

As Patton’s feet pounded closer, Virgil curled deeper into his knees. His head sunk down until his face was completely hidden. He clamped his hands over his neck like he was try to wait out an earthquake. Pure terror shrouded Virgil and it made Patton’s insides boil.

Patton sat down and rubbed his hand over Virgil’s back; he could feel how tense his entire body was beneath his hoodie. He hated the way Virgil flinched under his touch, “Virgil, it’s me, it’s Patton. Can I give you a hug?”

Virgil didn’t answer with words, instead just barreling into Patton’s side. He wrapped his arm’s around Patton’s waist in a vice-grip and buried his head in Patton’s chest. Patton could feel Virgil’s chest brushing steadily against his own and only then realized how out of breath he was.

Patton wrapped his arms around Virgil’s shoulders and squeezed as tight as he could without risking some sort of collateral damage. It was grounding- feeling Virgil in his grasp, the tiny movements he made pressed against his chest, his hands gripping at the material of Patton’s shirt. It made everything feel real again; it was like the entire world had lost gravity but holding onto Virgil, Patton could at least get his feet on the ground.

The ringing faded from his ears, leaving nothing but the persistent sounds of rain to take its place. The street was dead and only the clouds could gaze down on their huddled forms. Virgil was shaking against his side but Patton couldn’t tell if he was crying or shivering.

He sat without saying anything for a few moments, clinging to Virgil just as tight as Virgil squeezed around him. He didn’t want to let go, still just trying to convince himself that Virgil was there, that he was ok.

An eerie calm fell over the scene. The lack of cars driving past made it seems like the entire world had paused around them. The rain fell in a consistent drizzle- it wasn’t even drops, simply a blanket that coated everything in a gloomy haze. It could have been five in the morning or three in the afternoon or even a completely different planet and Patton wouldn’t have been able to tell.

Virgil shifted against him, “Hey.”

Patton looked down, ready to respond but froze when he saw Virgil’s face. A cut arched over his left eyebrow, a streak of blood running all the way down to the dark shadow beneath his eyes, “Virgil, oh my god?! Are you ok? How did that happen?”

Virgil shrugged and broke away from Patton’s stare, “I got into a car accident. Shit like that happens. I probably hit my head on the wheel or something.”

“Yeah but are you ok?” If Virgil was going to be overly casual, then Patton would just have to substitute as his self preservation instincts.

“I’m fine, really. It looks worse than it actually is.”

Patton pursed his lips. It was obvious Virgil didn’t really want to talk about it, “Well, ok... are you hurt anywhere else?”

“I think I got kinda bruised on my chest from the seatbelt but it’ll be fine. It could have been a lot worse.”

Virgil’s hollow voice sent chills down Patton’s spine. His words made him tighten his grip around Virgil again as he was reminded just how lucky he was to be able to hold him at all.

Patton was still trying to get his feet on the ground but he realized with a start that Virgil was miles away. Virgil could have died. No wonder he sounded hollow, his mind was probably trying to run away from the memory of what had happened as fast as he possibly could.

Patton began rubbing his hand rhythmically across Virgil’s shoulders. Despite the chaos around them, that at least felt somewhat familiar. Virgil said Patton could help him calm down better than anyone else- something about how he drew his attention from all the thoughts in his head back to his physical form. Patton prayed he could help in the only way he knew how to.

Virgil stared out across the wreckage. His eyes were glassy and filled with clouds to rival the gray hanging in the sky.

“They ran the stop sign,” His voice reached down from somewhere in the storm.

“T-boned my car. Their front bumper hit my passenger side,” He was a thousand miles away.

Patton brushed his hand up and down along the vertical stripes of Virgil’s plaid sweatshirt, trying to follow the beats of his breathing.

“Then they just kept driving,” A hundred miles, “I don’t get how really- their car couldn’t have been much better off than mine.”

Patton just wished he could do more. He didn’t know what to do and all he did know was that it wasn’t enough. He wanted to reverse all of time just to stop Virgil from getting hurt.

“It was crazy. I don’t even know how to explain it. It was like being on a roller coaster, except there’s no tracks and you have no idea where it’s going or when it’s going to stop or if it’s ever actually going to stop,” Ten miles- tops. His voice was quickly deteriorating, weakening with every foot he fell closer to the surface of the planet.

Patton could feel Virgil shaking in his arms. He felt so small and Patton wished he could protect him from every ugly, horrible thing in this stupid world. Virgil didn’t deserve this.

Virgil hit the surface of the planet with a shudder, chocking on his words as they tumbled out of his mouth, “I just- I kept thinking- and about- but I couldn’t do- I just wanted and-“

Virgil froze suddenly, the silence shocking after his stream of broken words. Patton wasn’t sure if it was better or worse until Virgil slumped forward, sobs wracking his body. It was quiet except for the hiccuping gasps the escaped Virgil and Patton could say decisively that this was so much worse than any incoherent ramble.

Patton ran his hand through Virgil’s hair, keeping the other arm tucked snugly around Virgil’s side. He winced as his fingers hit the sticky dampness in his bangs that could only be blood. He kept shushing him gently, but he wasn’t actually sure who he was telling to be quiet. It wasn’t that he wanted Virgil to be quiet; he just wanted the rest of the world to stop for a moment.

They sat there for what could have been anywhere between a minute and a week, seconds drawn out between Virgil’s stuttering breaths.

Virgil shifted suddenly, raising his head and turning his knees to face Patton. His eyes were red and still filled with tears. His face was flushed but the cut still stood out; it burned a dark burgundy as the blood dried and a bruise bloomed out around it. It was nearly painful to look at. It felt like Patton’s heart was being squeezed in a giant fist and no matter what he did, he couldn’t escape that suffocating pressure. He was still so angry- angrier than he had felt in years and to the point it was almost surprising.

“I’m sorry,” Virgil’s voice was small and cracked between the words.

Patton could feel his eyebrows scrunching together, “Why would you have a single thing to be sorry for?”

Virgil hung his head, arms balanced on his knees so Patton couldn’t quite see his face, “I don’t know... this was supposed to be our first date and I ruined it.”

Patton wasn’t sure how to respond. He could feel his heart shattering at Virgil’s words, glass shards cutting through his chest. A tiny incredulous laugh crawled its way up Patton’s throat. Or maybe it had fallen from his dizzy head. Either way, it landed in his mouth, mixing bitterly with the coppery taste of adrenaline.

He shook his head, “No, Virge. Please don’t be sorry. This isn’t your fault. Besides, I’m just glad that you’re ok.”

“But-“

“But nothing. I’m happy just to be able to hold you,” Patton tried to convey his sincerity, pushing his gratefulness into every word and hoping Virgil would hear it.

Virgil scooted closer and leaned his head against Patton’s chest. Patton tucked his chin over Virgil’s head, happy to feel Virgil’s breathing steadying out into its regular pattern. The gasps were replaced with only the occasional sniffle.

“So, where were you going to take me?”

“What?”

“Where were you going to take me?” Virgil repeated the question, “You know, for our date?”

Patton’s lips twitched up into a smile, “That’s a surprise.”

Virgil gave a huff of a laugh, “It’s not exactly like we’re going to go now.”

Patton rolled the question around in his head, “Yeah, but we could try again sometime; First Date, Take Two. I mean, if that’s something you would like to do.”

“Why wouldn’t I want to do that?” Virgil sounded genuinely confused.

“It’s just that... I thought that maybe,” Patton sighed, “Maybe you didn’t actually want to go out with me and that I had kinda ruined our friendship.”

Virgil moved so he could face Patton directly, “You really thought I didn’t mean it when I said yes?”

Patton tried not squirm but the usual butterflies in his stomach had transformed into snakes, “It’s not that I didn’t believe you, I just wondered-“

Virgil interrupted with a laugh but Patton couldn’t figure out what was so funny. His eyes narrowed as they studied Patton’s face, trying to find something but what exactly, Patton had no clue.

“God, you big dummy,” Virgil chuckled again and Patton felt something in his chest crumble. He didn’t want to hear the next words, he just wanted to implode in on himself and never face the world again, “I love you. I have for years. I know this might be kind of weird to say, seeing as we haven’t even had our first date but I’ve known you for what feels like forever and you’re my best friend and when you said you liked me as more of a friend I was so surprised but-“

“You love me?” Patton cut off Virgil’s ramble. Those were not the words he had been expecting.

Virgil wrung his hands in his lap, “Yeah. Is that ok?”

“Virgil, honey, I-“ Patton tried to stutter out all of the things he was feeling but it just wasn’t possible. He took a deep breath, letting his body relax for the first time in he-didn’t-know-how-long. He let himself simply dissolve into the warmth that was taking over all of his systems, “I love you too.”

Patton wasn’t really sure what happened next. He was leaning forward and Virgil was leaning forward and suddenly their lips were pressed together. His eyes fluttered close as he melted further towards Virgil. It was gentle and warm despite the drizzle that continued to coat them. Patton could feel Virgil’s eyelashes brush against his cheek; they were damp and nearly as soft his mouth.

Virgil pulled away, “Uh, was that ok too?”

“I think that was a little more than ok,” Patton hoped his voice wasn’t as weak as it sounded to his own ears.

Virgil let his head fall back against Patton’s chest which- from the inside- felt like a furnace left on too long, “Ow!”

Patton immediately jumped at Virgil’s expression of pain, “What’s wrong?”

“I hit my cut on your chest. It’s fine.”

As much as Patton wished he could stay in that moment, he knew it couldn’t last forever, “We should get you to the hospital; you might be worse off than you think.

Virgil whined as Patton stood up but accepted the hand up. His legs shook as he tried to put weight on them. It took him a moment to gain his balance, placing a bit more of his weight on Patton than was probably necessary as he leaned his shoulder, “How are we going to get there?”

“I’ll drive you.”

“Uh, Patton?”

“Yeah?”

“You don’t have a car, remember?”

“Oh.”

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~ @phan-fander @abi-beehive @fandomfan315 ~

[lilfellasblog]

New chapter of Healing Broken Wings is posted on AO3!

Chapter 167 is up!