#mu Qing’s mom

[ivlenyxx]

Comfort on New Year’s Eve (FengQing oneshot)

Summary:

Mu Qing is sad that his mother isn't here to visit him for New Year's and laments it on the balcony. Feng Xin comes to take a breather but ends up comforting Mu Qing instead. They talk about their feelings and this ends in a kiss

Notes:

Lol I wrote this in the middle of the night and published it at like 3 am, so it's very bad compared to my other fic and I didn't beta read it cause I was too tired to. Enjoy tho. Constructive criticism welcome as always.

Btw, translations for the text messages in Cantonese will be provided at the end of the paragraph.

“Why did I ever agree to this?”

Mu Qing asks himself as he stares up into the night sky, the loud noise of people partying behind him echoing to where he was standing on the balcony.

Mu Qing sighs and takes out his phone, unlocking it and staring at all the messages that his mother had left him.

Mama

Mama: 我個乖仔點啊? 喺大學讀得開唔開心啊? 識咗新朋友未啊? (sent 11:27 pm, Hong Kong time)

Mama: 新年快樂啊! (sent 11:27 pm, Hong Kong time)

Mama: 媽咪今個新年離唔到英國探你真係對唔住啊, 我喺香港好忙, 連新年過嚟搵你嘅時間都無,但喺你生日嘅時候我一定嚟探你!媽咪應承你! 希望你可以你可以原諒媽咪啦! (Sent 11:28 pm, Hong Kong time)

(Translations:

Mama: How’s my good boy? Are you happy studying at the university? Make any new friends?

Mama: Happy New Year!

Mama: Mami is sorry she can’t come to England to see you this year, I’m very busy in Hong Kong, and can’t even make time to visit you on New Year’s, but I will come to visit on your birthday! Mami promises you she will! I hope you can forgive Mami!)

Mu Qing stares at the last message, his mom hadn’t made it to England to visit him for New Year’s this year, but she’d promised him that she’d make it for his birthday.

The thought that she isn’t there for him this New Year’s made Mu Qing feel… sad? Ever since he was born, Mu Qing always celebrated New Year’s with his mother, making niangao, going to the park to look at the lanterns at night, playing with fireworks at night, those were all the things that they did together, and though it wasn’t much, it made Mu Qing happy, and the fact that his mother was there with him made it ten times better.

But ever since he started college in London, he hasn’t been able to see his mother much, and while she still visits him for New Year’s, Christmas and his birthday every year, the fact that she isn’t here this year just made Mu Qing feel awful.

He wipes away some tears forming in his eyes and takes a deep breath.

It’s just one year, Mu Qing, she’ll be here for your birthday. He tells himself.

But that doesn’t make it any better.

Mu Qing tries to wipe away more tears forming in his eyes and looks towards the sky once again.

“Hey.”

A voice rings out from behind him. Mu Qing turns around to see Feng Xin, carrying two cups of what he assumes is tea and looking at him curiously.

“What are you doing out here?” Feng Xin asks.

“Could say the same for you.” Mu Qing responds, trying to keep his voice as steady as possible. “What are you doing here?”

Feng Xin sighs and leans on the railing of the balcony.

“It was too chaotic in there, had to come out to take a breather.”

“What? Can’t take a bit of noise?” Mu Qing teases him.

“Hey-” Feng Xin opens his mouth to protest, but stops himself when he sees that Mu Qing is shaking slightly.

“Hey, are you cold?”

“No.” Mu Qing says, voice trembling. “I’m fine.”

Feng Xin sighs. “No, I can see that you’re shivering.” he takes off his jacket and drapes it over Mu Qing.

“Hey, what are you-” Mu Qing flushes a bit when he feels the jacket being put on him. “I don’t need this.” he glowers at Feng Xin and hands the jacket back to him.

“No, you do.” Feng Xin puts the jacket back onto him and shoves the cup of tea in his hands. “You’re gonna catch a cold if you don’t cover up.”

“Quit mother-henning me.” Mu Qing rolls his eyes and takes a sip of the tea. The tea is warm, not too bitter, and warms him up the moment it touches his tongue, and he could feel the warmth spreading from his stomach to the tips of his fingers.

It reminds him of his mom.

Tears start forming in Mu Qing’s eyes again and he wipes them away.

“Hey, are you okay?” Feng Xin asks him, concerned.

“Of course I’m okay, what makes you think that I’m not okay?” Mu Qing says dryly, but there’s a tremble to his voice and Feng Xin notices that Mu Qing’s eyes are red and there are tear tracks running down his face.

“Yeah I’m not buying it.” Feng Xin says. “What’s going on?”

“I said I’m fine, don’t you have better things to do?” Mu Qing rolls his eyes, trying to appear as apathetic as possible.

“No, no I don't.” Feng Xin says and scoots closer to Mu Qing. “You can tell me what’s wrong.”

“I told you already, there’s nothing wrong-”

“Mu Qing I will literally not let you leave this balcony unless you tell me what’s wrong, right now.” Feng Xin says firmly, and locks Mu Qing’s wrist in a tight grip.

“What the- let me go!” Mu Qing tries to yank his arm out of Feng Xin’s grip, but to no avail.

“I told you, I’m not letting you go until you tell me what’s wrong.”

Mu Qing struggles to get out of Feng Xin’s grip, and he tries and tries for a long time but to no avail. He eventually gives up and just sighs.

“Alright, fine.” he sighs in defeat. “I’ll tell you.”

“Hm.” Feng Xin says, satisfied, and lets go of Mu Qing.

Mu Qing takes a deep breath. “You know how my mom always comes visit me on New Year’s Eve?”

“Yeah, I know, she won’t stop fussing over us.” Feng Xin sighs fondly, reminiscing about Mrs Mu’s last visit to their campus, where she fussed over how Feng Xin and Mu Qing kept their dorm room and cleaned and reorganized everything.

“Yeah well, she didn’t come to visit this year.” Mu Qing hangs his head low, trying to not let Feng Xin see the tears in his eyes. “She promised that she would come on my birthday, but I’m still kinda bummed that she didn’t come for New Year. She always comes to visit, yet this year, she didn’t come. I know it’s silly and kind of stupid, but I haven't seen her in so long and I miss her, you know what I mean?” he sniffs and wipes the tears away. He uses a moment to muster up the courage to look at Feng Xin, fully expecting him to laugh at him or otherwise be weirded out, but once he raises his head, Feng Xin’s expression is unreadable.

“Don’t, I already know what you're thinking.” Mu Qing turns to the side, expecting Feng Xin to burst out laughing.

But what he didn’t expect was for Feng Xin to wrap his arms around him and envelope him in a tight hug.

Mu Qing is startled at first, but eventually melts into the hug and wraps his arms around Feng Xin’s waist.

“Mu Qing, it’s okay to miss your mom.” Feng Xin says as he rubs circles on his back. “It’s completely fine to be sad about your mom not coming to visit you on New Year’s. You can talk to us about it. Xie Lian, Shi QingXuan, me… We’d all listen.”

Tears spill out of Mu Qing’s eyes and he cries into Feng Xin’s shirt, but his mouth can’t stop morphing into a smile as he cries, and once he faces Feng Xin, he’s fully smiling.

That sight makes Feng Xin’s heart leap.

“I-I know, thanks.” Mu Qing wipes the tears away and looks down. “Feng Xin, there’s something I need to tell you.”

Feng Xin’s breath hitches. “What is it?”

Mu Qing takes a deep breath. “I don’t know how to tell you this, but since we’ve known eachother long enough, I might as well tell you..”

“10!”

“What do you mean?” Feng Xin asks nervously.

“It’s kind of stupid, and you might hate me for it.”

“9!”

“But,” Mu Qing prepares himself. “I think it’d be better to just tell you instead of hiding it.”

“8!”

“Feng Xin,” Mu Qing begins, staring into Feng Xin’s eyes.

“7!”

“I have a crush on you.”

That takes Feng Xin by surprise, and he is frozen for a split second. “W-what?” he says weakly.

“6!”

“It means that I like you, romantically.”

“5!”

“And I would like you to be my boyfriend.”

“4!”

Feng Xin has to pinch himself a few times just to make sure he isn’t dreaming. “You’re serious?”

“Yes.”

“3!”

“Well then,” Feng Xin puts a hand on Mu Qing’s cheek. “I’d like to.” he says as he stares into his eyes.

“Oh.” a pretty blush floods Mu Qing’s face. “Well then would you want to-”

“Yes.”

“2!”

Mu Qing raises a hand to caress Feng Xin’s cheek, and takes a deep breath. He dives in, lips fitting onto each other perfectly, and touching as soon as the crowd chanted 1.

“Happy New Year, Feng Xin.” Mu Qing smiles as he presses his and Feng Xin’s foreheads together, fireworks going off in the background.

“Happy New Year, Mu Qing.” Feng Xin says before diving in for another kiss from his boyfriend.

Notes:

Thanks for reading this train wreck of a oneshot! It's definitely not as good compared to the other one I have and I think I'll rewrite it one day to fix the mistakes, but for now, happy new year and I hope 2023 will not be as bad as the previous 3 years (I do not have high hopes tho.)

Link to OG on ao3: https://archiveofourown.org/works/43982388

[xx-simpfulstar-xx]

I am a "Mu Qing is the mom friend" truther

[heret7k]

totally forgot to post this peifengqing sketch on here

[csilla-nocturne]

This isn't exactly a plotbunny, but I keep imagining the absolute hilarity of a modern AU where a combination of Qi Rong, and her son's friends, and boyfriend constantly being at each other's throats has kinda conditioned Xie Lian's mom to think their behavior is completely normal, while every time she has friends visit, they end up seriously wondering if they need to call the police.

[chewiiez]

dear mu qing haters,

WHAT.

i think u need glasses....

because u didn't really read the book did u?

there's this thing called subtext,

and i need to you to understand that what a character looks like on the surface,

is not who they are beneath!

...

original post was discussing the difference between donghua fengqing expressions when xie lian was revealed to be fangxin guoshi who committed a massacre. feng xin looked scared, mu qing had what looked like a smile on his face. people in reblogs were hating on mq even tho we all know what this man went thru and how FLAWED his reaction is what makes him the best character in tgcf :)

stan mu qing <3

[happypeachsludgeflower]

I was chattering my sister’s ear off on the phone earlier about the tgcf brother!huaqing fanfic I’m writing and she was hmn-ing along sounding like she kinda wanted to die (she’s never watched or read a mxtx story and did not understand anything I was saying).

And somewhere along the way the connection cut my ramble short (no clue when though because I just kept talking) and now she’s not answering her texts…

I have been ghosted by my own sister.

[chuckduckling]

I think I will always approach discussions of Mu Qing's betrayal sideways because...well, if my friend was like "I could've made important connections in the heavenly court and gotten your family food, but instead, I decided to perform a purely symbolic display of loyalty that accomplished nothing and lost me those connections", I'd have been like "what the fuck dude that was stupid???"

The fact that MQ apologizes after the incident, and still brings Xie Lian's family food anyways, is also why I just...I can't hold that specific betrayal against him.

...I even went to look up the scene again just now, because I was like, "am I remembering some details wrong?" And honestly, MQ came across even more understandable to me.

Quotes under the cut:

Mu‌ ‌Qing‌ ‌raised‌ ‌his‌ ‌hand‌ ‌lightly,‌ ‌pointing‌ ‌to‌ ‌the‌ ‌side.‌ ‌What‌ ‌he‌ ‌was‌ ‌pointing‌ ‌at‌ ‌were‌ ‌several‌ ‌clean‌ ‌sacks,‌ ‌probably‌ ‌with‌ ‌rice‌ ‌or‌ ‌grain‌ ‌in‌ ‌them.‌ ‌

Seeing‌ ‌Xie‌ ‌Lian‌ ‌so‌ ‌quiet,‌ ‌Mu‌ ‌Qing‌ ‌said‌ ‌softly,‌ ‌“I‌ ‌heard‌ ‌you‌ ‌are‌ ‌needing‌ ‌medicine.‌ ‌I’ll‌ ‌think‌ ‌of‌ ‌a‌ ‌way‌ ‌to‌ ‌get‌ ‌some‌ ‌later.”‌ ‌

—

Mu‌ ‌Qing‌ ‌bowed‌ ‌his‌ ‌head,‌ ‌“I’m‌ ‌sorry.”‌ ‌ ‌

—

Mu‌ ‌Qing‌ ‌exclaimed‌ ‌with‌ ‌a‌ ‌cracked‌ ‌voice,‌ ‌“YES!‌ ‌I‌ ‌WAS‌ ‌WRONG,‌ ‌I‌ ‌ADMIT‌ ‌IT,‌ ‌AND‌ ‌I‌ ‌APOLOGIZE!‌ ‌BUT‌ ‌I‌ ‌WANTED‌ ‌TO‌ ‌SOLVE‌ ‌ALL‌ ‌THE‌ ‌CURRENT‌ ‌PROBLEMS‌ ‌FIRST‌ ‌BEFORE‌ ‌WE‌ ‌THINK‌ ‌ABOUT‌ ‌ANYTHING‌ ‌ELSE!‌ ‌Your‌ ‌parents‌ ‌and‌ ‌my‌ ‌mother,‌ ‌the‌ ‌three‌ ‌of‌ ‌us,‌ ‌who‌ ‌knows‌ ‌how‌ ‌long‌ ‌we’d‌ ‌have‌ ‌to‌ ‌struggle‌ ‌in‌ ‌the‌ ‌mud!‌ ‌If‌ ‌I‌ ‌went‌ ‌back‌ ‌first,‌ ‌maybe‌ ‌there’d‌ ‌still‌ ‌be‌ ‌a‌ ‌chance...”‌ ‌

—

Mu‌ ‌Qing’s‌ ‌face‌ ‌was‌ ‌now‌ ‌green‌ ‌and‌ ‌he‌ ‌took‌ ‌a‌ ‌step‌ ‌forward,‌ ‌“When‌ ‌His‌ ‌Highness‌ ‌was‌ ‌in‌ ‌a‌ ‌tight‌ ‌spot,‌ ‌wasn’t‌ ‌he‌ ‌forced‌ ‌to‌ ‌commit‌ ‌robbery‌ ‌too?‌ ‌Why‌ ‌when‌ ‌it‌ ‌comes‌ ‌to‌ ‌me,‌ ‌you‌ ‌can’t‌ ‌accept‌ ‌it?”‌ ‌

—

...and then he silently lets XL hit him, and leaves the food behind for everyone.

Honestly, the main issue I see here is that MQ's cold practicality is running headfirst into XL's volatile emotional state.

I still find XL's feelings understandable though, because he's been heavily traumatized and gaslit by a superpowered stalker, and he's...not in a great place...and is in deep need of emotional support...to put it mildly.

[backpackingspace]

Okay obviously we all love to babifie xie lian but what if we made it literal. Baby xie lian ascending at 14 getting banished at 17.

[mxtxfanatic]

Xie Lian closed his eyes and nodded, a hand covering his front, “...I won’t lie to you. Even though in front of everyone, I might not have revealed this, even to Feng Xin and Mu Qing back then I had never said anything dispiriting, but I actually...”

Actually, deep in his heart, he had deeply feared that creature.

There was a period of time when even just hearing the name would make him tremble nonstop. However, Xie Lian had never dared to allow anyone see, because he was the very hope in fighting White No-Face. If even he was scared, then wouldn’t everyone else fall into despair? If that should happen, then everything would collapse!

—Chapt. 167: Jealous Demon King; Three Questions on Where the Friendship Lies

It’s truly sad how Xie Lian had no one he could rely on because everyone was relying on him with no reciprocity. It’s heartbreaking that he didn’t feel like he was owed reciprocity even in relationships with his closest loved ones.

[i-bring-crack]

Dude Imagine an AU where Mu Qing is trying to get Hua Cheng to leave the army so that he doesn't get killed but Hua Cheng relents to the point Mu Qing gets mad about him and shouts

"IF YOU WANNA OFFER YOUR LIFE THEN GO AND TRAIN FIRST, IF YOU CAN BEAT ME ILL GLADLY PUT YOU BACK IN THE ARMY!"

And realizes a second later what he just said but can't take it back now.

So Hua Cheng sticks to him out of spite, trained by Mu Qing out of spite and always tailing around him so that he can get a little bit closer to Danxia.

And Danxia thinks that Hua Cheng is Mu Qings adopted brother now so he also tries to get closer to him despite the entire Xianle capital kingdom falling down.

Hua Cheng becomes one of Xie Lian's servants just like Mu Qing, he has to tend to the clothes and care for the highness, even after the fall the boy still remains alongside the trio and the royal family, bc he doesn't really have a family except for Mu Qing and his mother who is also such a nice lady to him, mostly because she can't see so she doesn't judge his appearance.

So when the time comes for Mu Qing to leave, Hua Cheng understands but still doesn't leave Xie Lian behind, and, in an awfully kind way(the best he can muster), tells Xie Lian that he just has some things that are more important in his own head, and that Xie Lian doesn't need to worry about him.

Hua Cheng didn't expect for Mu Qing to come along with 33 others to cultivate under the same mountain Xie Lian was already in.

And as much as he tries, Hua Cheng can't beat against all of the gods, and neither can the banished Xie Lian. Mu Qing just watches it all go down, his body shaking, both in fear of stepping out and out of anger as he tries to help them both out, telling them to leave for their own good.

Hua Cheng punches him, it's weak and one he could have easily dodged, yet it still hurts when that pain is added to the last two people in his life he had a small closeness to.

A hundred years later he happens to find Hua Cheng again as a GHOST(died trying to protect Danxia Noooo, yall can guess if it was at the stabby stabby temple or at the Lang-er bay ) and of devastation rank no less.

For a moment he almost finds wanting to join in the challenge just to see Hua Cheng again, but rejects it out of fear since he knows they both ended on bad terms.

Then, he remembers about Xie Lian, and goes out to meet Hua Cheng again who thinks his battle has been accepted but definitely didn't expect for Mu Qing to come without weapons– he already defeated 33 gods, yet he dares to think so highly of himself that he doesn't bring a weapon— Mu Qing tries to explain to Hua Cheng that he is trying to ask about Xie Lian and isn't looking for a challenge.

Hua Cheng eventually manages to almost win against him until Feng Xin arrives, surprised to see Hua Cheng again and also ask him the same thing, "What happened to Xie Lian."

Hua Cheng doesn't say it because he thinks they dont deserve to hear about such thing but he does point out that he is gone, somewhere out there and he's alone in a miserable world while the two of them rejoice in luxury at the capital.

This leaves them speechless until Mu Qing speaks up: "You only have connections to the earth while I have to the heavens, it'll be faster if we are both looking instead of just one."

Hua Cheng doesn't believe him but he still let's him and Feng Xin live, albeit with a shit ton of wounds that Mu Qing took it as payback for leaving all those years he left— or maybe it was a show of mercy due to Hua Cheng being sheltered by Mu Qing and his loving mother.

Still, for hundreds of years Mu Qing and Hua Cheng slowly remend a kind brotherly bond while trying to find out where Xie Lian is. Somewhat. He still didn't care as much about his life during the lava cliff, rather Feng Xin seemed more worried than before.

[It wasn't that Hua Cheng didn't believe he was working for Jun Wu, in fact if it's coming such unbelievable words from Mu Qings mouth then that definitely is the truth. It's just that if he's stuck in such a dangerous situation then it's definitely a bait of Jun Wu.]

Most of the common talk consisted of Mu Qing trading childhood memories of Xie Lian and Hua Cheng asking for Mu Qing criticism to help him perfect his Danxia artwork.

Bonus headcanon that the only time Feng Xin and Hua Cheng got along was when they could make fun of Mu Qing.

In the third assencion Mu Qing barges into Ghost city, Breaks Hua Cheng door and drags him to Yu Jun Mountain.

[ivlenyxx]

Comfort on New Year's Eve (Fengqing oneshot)

“Why did I ever agree to this?” 

Mu Qing asks himself as he stares up into the night sky, the loud noise of people partying behind him echoing to where he was standing on the balcony. 

Mu Qing sighs and takes out his phone, unlocking it and staring at all the messages that his mother had left him. 

Mama

Mama: 我個乖仔點啊? 喺大學讀得開唔開心啊? 識咗新朋友未啊? (sent 11:27 pm, Hong Kong time)

Mama: 新年快樂啊! (sent 11:27 pm, Hong Kong time)

Mama: 媽咪今個新年離唔到英國探你真係對唔住啊, 我喺香港好忙, 連新年過嚟搵你嘅

`​​時間都無,但喺你生日嘅時候我一定嚟探你!媽咪應承你! 希望你可以你可以原諒媽咪啦! (Sent 11:28 pm, Hong Kong time)

(Translations:

Mama: How’s my good boy? Are you happy studying at the university? Make any new friends?

Mama: Happy New Year! 

Mama: Mami is sorry she can’t come to England to see you this year, I’m very busy in Hong Kong, and can’t even make time to visit you on New Year’s, but I will come to visit on your birthday! Mami promises you she will! I hope you can forgive Mami!)

Mu Qing stares at the last message, his mom hadn’t made it to England to visit him for New Year’s this year, but she’d promised him that she’d make it for his birthday.

The thought that she isn’t there for him this New Year’s made Mu Qing feel… sad? Ever since he was born, Mu Qing always celebrated New Year’s with his mother, making niangao, going to the park to look at the lanterns at night, playing with fireworks at night, those were all the things that they did together, and though it wasn’t much, it made Mu Qing happy, and the fact that his mother was there with him made it ten times better.

But ever since he started college in London, he hasn’t been able to see his mother much, and while she still visits him for New Year’s, Christmas and his birthday every year, the fact that she isn’t here this year just made Mu Qing feel awful.

He wipes away some tears forming in his eyes and takes a deep breath.

It’s just one year, Mu Qing, she’ll be here for your birthday. He tells himself. 

But that doesn’t make it any better.

Mu Qing tries to wipe away more tears forming in his eyes and looks towards the sky once again. 

“Hey.”

A voice rings out from behind him. Mu Qing turns around to see Feng Xin, carrying two cups of what he assumes is tea and looking at him curiously.

“What are you doing out here?” Feng Xin asks. 

“Could say the same for you.” Mu Qing responds, trying to keep his voice as steady as possible. “What are you doing here?” 

Feng Xin sighs and leans on the railing of the balcony.

“It was too chaotic in there, had to come out to take a breather.”

“What? Can’t take a bit of noise?” Mu Qing teases him. 

“Hey-” Feng Xin opens his mouth to protest, but stops himself when he sees that Mu Qing is shaking slightly. 

“Hey, are you cold?” 

“No.” Mu Qing says, voice trembling. “I’m fine.” 

Feng Xin sighs. “No, I can see that you’re shivering.” he takes off his jacket and drapes it over Mu Qing. 

“Hey, what are you-” Mu Qing flushes a bit when he feels the jacket being put on him. “I don’t need this.” he glowers at Feng Xin and hands the jacket back to him.

“No, you do.” Feng Xin puts the jacket back onto him and shoves the cup of tea in his hands. “You’re gonna catch a cold if you don’t cover up.” 

“Quit mother-henning me.” Mu Qing rolls his eyes and takes a sip of the tea. The tea is warm, not too bitter, and warms him up the moment it touches his tongue, and he could feel the warmth spreading from his stomach to the tips of his fingers. 

It reminds him of his mom.

Tears start forming in Mu Qing’s eyes again and he wipes them away. 

“Hey, are you okay?” Feng Xin asks him, concerned.

“Of course I’m okay, what makes you think that I’m not okay?” Mu Qing says dryly, but there’s a tremble to his voice and Feng Xin notices that Mu Qing’s eyes are red and there are tear tracks running down his face. 

“Yeah I’m not buying it.” Feng Xin says. “What’s going on?” 

“I said I’m fine, don’t you have better things to do?” Mu Qing rolls his eyes, trying to appear as apathetic as possible. 

“No, no I don't.” Feng Xin says and scoots closer to Mu Qing. “You can tell me what’s wrong.” 

“I told you already, there’s nothing wrong-”

“Mu Qing I will literally not let you leave this balcony unless you tell me what’s wrong, right now.” Feng Xin says firmly, and locks Mu Qing’s wrist in a tight grip. 

“What the- let me go!” Mu Qing tries to yank his arm out of Feng Xin’s grip, but to no avail. 

“I told you, I’m not letting you go until you tell me what’s wrong.” 

Mu Qing struggles to get out of Feng Xin’s grip, and he tries and tries for a long time but to no avail. He eventually gives up and just sighs. 

“Alright, fine.” he sighs in defeat. “I’ll tell you.” 

“Hm.” Feng Xin says, satisfied, and lets go of Mu Qing. 

Mu Qing takes a deep breath. “You know how my mom always comes visit me on New Year’s Eve?” 

“Yeah, I know, she won’t stop fussing over us.” Feng Xin sighs fondly, reminiscing about Mrs Mu’s last visit to their campus, where she fussed over how Feng Xin and Mu Qing kept their dorm room and cleaned and reorganized everything. 

“Yeah well, she didn’t come to visit this year.” Mu Qing hangs his head low, trying to not let Feng Xin see the tears in his eyes. “She promised that she would come on my birthday, but I’m still kinda bummed that she didn’t come for New Year. She always comes to visit, yet this year, she didn’t come. I know it’s silly and kind of stupid, but I haven't seen her in so long and I miss her, you know what I mean?” he sniffs and wipes the tears away. He uses a moment to muster up the courage to look at Feng Xin, fully expecting him to laugh at him or otherwise be weirded out, but once he raises his head, Feng Xin’s expression is unreadable. 

“Don’t, I already know what you're thinking.” Mu Qing turns to the side, expecting Feng Xin to burst out laughing. 

But what he didn’t expect was for Feng Xin to wrap his arms around him and envelope him in a tight hug. 

Mu Qing is startled at first, but eventually melts into the hug and wraps his arms around Feng Xin’s waist. 

“Mu Qing, it’s okay to miss your mom.” Feng Xin says as he rubs circles on his back. “It’s completely fine to be sad about your mom not coming to visit you on New Year’s. You can talk to us about it. Xie Lian, Shi QingXuan, me… We’d all listen.” 

Tears spill out of Mu Qing’s eyes and he cries into Feng Xin’s shirt, but his mouth can’t stop morphing into a smile as he cries, and once he faces Feng Xin, he’s fully smiling. 

That sight makes Feng Xin’s heart leap. 

“I-I know, thanks.” Mu Qing wipes the tears away and looks down. “Feng Xin, there’s something I need to tell you.” 

Feng Xin’s breath hitches. “What is it?” 

Mu Qing takes a deep breath. “I don’t know how to tell you this, but since we’ve known eachother long enough, I might as well tell you..”

“10!”

“What do you mean?” Feng Xin asks nervously. 

“It’s kind of stupid, and you might hate me for it.” 

“9!”

“But,” Mu Qing prepares himself. “I think it’d be better to just tell you instead of hiding it.”

“8!”

“Feng Xin,” Mu Qing begins, staring into Feng Xin’s eyes. 

“7!”

“I have a crush on you.” 

That takes Feng Xin by surprise, and he is frozen for a split second. “W-what?” he says weakly.

“6!”

“It means that I like you, romantically.” 

“5!”

“And I would like you to be my boyfriend.” 

“4!”

Feng Xin has to pinch himself a few times just to make sure he isn’t dreaming. “You’re serious?” 

“Yes.”

“3!”

“Well then,” Feng Xin puts a hand on Mu Qing’s cheek. “I’d like to.” he says as he stares into his eyes. 

“Oh.” a pretty blush floods Mu Qing’s face. “Well then would you want to-” 

“Yes.” 

“2!” 

Mu Qing raises a hand to caress Feng Xin’s cheek, and takes a deep breath. He dives in, lips fitting onto each other perfectly, and touching as soon as the crowd chanted 1. 

“Happy New Year, Feng Xin.” Mu Qing smiles as he presses his and Feng Xin’s foreheads together, fireworks going off in the background. 

“Happy New Year, Mu Qing.” Feng Xin says before diving in for another kiss from his boyfriend. 

originally posted on AO3 under the name of "ikixingyii".

the original fic on AO3

[confusedgoldenflower]

Back on my bs again

So for my fics (yes more than 1), I was thinking about what someone had to do to get executed instead of amputated or thrown somewhere else to work, which would entail something drastic to say the least.

Result: I headcannon that MQ’s dad must’a done something to insult the throne, SO maybe he was involved in that uprising that killed QR’s mom!

Just some of Confu’s thoughts

[yourcrumblingsaikiisnotmyproblem]

here's a few reminders for the mxtx fandom

1. Wei Wuxian had 2 older sister figures in his life and they both died trying to save him and in the end failed since he died anyway. (RIP Wen Qing and Jiang Yanli)

2. Mu Qing only ever had his mom other than XL and FX and she died a mortal death. We don't know anything about FX's mortal family.

3. Wen Ning was experimented on for 13 years in captivity after seeing his sister's ashes and blames himself still for wwx's downfall

4. He Xuan cannot leave the world even after his revenge to Shi Wudu and is purposeless for all of his immortal life.

5. Jin Ling will never taste her mom's handmade favourite soup.

6. Canon Feng Xin and Mu Qing do not know what happened at the temple to Xie Lian.

7. Jiang Cheng will probably never be good enough in his own eyes (until he has like grand-nephews or something)

8. Shi Qingxuan will (probably) die a mortal death.

9. Some of Nie Huaisang's last words to Nie Mingjue were that he never wanted to be a clan leader.

10. XL and WWX both tried to protect a certain demographic that got wiped out anyway and made them public enemies and reason for their eventual downfall making it essentially ineffective.

11. All the calamities are actually gods who could or did ascend heaven.

12. Xiao Xingchen killed himself after finding out he wiped out villages full of innocent people and his own best friend who he gave up his eyes for. And realising his pursuit of helping the world was worthless.

[fengqingtrashgolbin]

Feng Xin: I have only said I love you to three people. My mom, Dianxia and a dying Mu Qing. One of those I regret.

Pei Ming: Which one?

Feng Xin: Mu Qing. He survived and now I look like an idiot.

[one-flower-one-sword]

"Mu Qing spat out a mouthful of blood and grimaced like he'd been stabbed where it hurt. He replied, spiteful slowly, "Thank goodness I kicked you out. If we'd kept you in the army and let you get closer to His Highness, were you going to watch him all day with your mind full of unspeakable filth? Disgusting!"

Xie Lian's heart squeezed violently. Hua Cheng had his fist raised at first, but it froze in midair when Mu Qing spat the word "disgusting." Veins bulged on the back of his pale hand. The fingers clenched and loosened, loosened then clenched.

A long moment later, Hua Cheng said icily, "For now, I won't argue with you on that point. [...]"

TGCF Volume 6, page 66

Hua Cheng's reaction here is really interesting - and gets more heartbreaking the more you think about it. I think to understand it, we need to take a look at his distorted self-image and his extreme self-blame whenever he feels he's failed Xie Lian in some way. While doing this, I think it's important to keep in mind that we're looking at these things as separate from Hua Cheng's very real - and very earned! - confidence in his knowledge, abilities, and strength. He knows exactly what he can and can't do and has no problems stating those things as facts. That "aggressive, rebellious confidence" as Xie Lian describes it is a defining part of Hua Cheng's personality and who he is as a person, that is then juxtaposed by a surprising fragility in other matters.

Right when we meet Hua Cheng at just ten years old, he's already been abused for so long and so severely that it's made him actively suicidal. He's also already internalized that his right eye is ugly, evidenced by the way that he keeps covering it with his hands when the bandages are removed after he was beaten and dragged through the streets by Qi Rong and his lackeys:

After a pause, Xie Lian smiled softly. "The doctors will see to your wounds now. Don't be afraid and lower your hands, okay?" The child heard but hesitantly shook his head.

"Why not?" Xie Lian asked.

He was silent for a long time before replying, "Ugly."

TGCF Volume 2, page 349

The right side of his face also appears to receive the most abuse when he gets beaten, as Xie Lian realizes when he sees him again a few years later and his bandages come loose after being attacked by a group of other kids:

During that scuffle, the bandages on the boy's head had been partially yanked off, giving a peek on the other half of his face. It was quite swollen, covered in black and blue bruises. It was obvious that these injuries hadn't been caused by the brawl just now. TGCF Volume 3, page 56

It can be deduced that he probably learned very early in his life that if people see his eye, he gets beaten. It seems to be known around the area that he frequently gets beaten up and kicked out by his family, to a point where even kids from wealthier families know about him and refer to him as apparently everyone else does - the "ugly freak":

"Wow, wow, the ugly freak got kicked out again!" Although these kids were all around the same age as the boy in the shrine, every single one of them was taller than him and looked like their parents fed them well. There was probably a holiday coming up, since they were all dressed in new clothes and shoes. [...] "Hey, ugly freak, are you sleeping at the shrine again tonight? Watch out, your mom is gonna beat the crap outta you when you get home!"

TGCF Volume 3, pages 54-55

This post is going to get quite long, so I'm putting the rest under a read more.

Hua Cheng seems to internalize this view of himself as something ugly and revolting to a point where even hundreds of years later, he's wary about showing Xie Lian his true form. At the same time, he seems to long deeply for Xie Lian to see and accept the real him, so he tries to test the waters when Xie Lian asks the "young master" on the ox cart what Hua Cheng looks like :

The youth laughed. "Who knows? But he's blind in one eye." He pointed to his right eye. "This one."

That was nothing outrageous. Xie Lian recalled one of the many backstory versions where Hua Cheng wore a black eyepatch to hide that missing eye and asked, "Do you know what happened to that eye?"

"That's a question everyone wants the answer to," the youth replied. Others asked because they wanted to know what Hua Cheng's weakness was, but Xie Lian asked purely out of curiosity. He didn't say anything, and the youth continued, "He dug it out himself."

TGCF Volume 1, page 175

And then again after they're back from Banyue:

Hua Cheng didn't turn around but continued to stare at the dilapidated ceiling of the shrine, and Xie Lian could only see this handsome young man's left profile. Hua Cheng said softly, "If I was ugly."

"Huh?" Xie Lian gaped.

Hua Cheng finally turned his head slightly. "If my true appearance is ugly, would you still want to see it?"

Xie Lian was taken aback. "Is it? Although there's no real reason, I never thought your true appearance would be too horrible-looking."

"Who knows?" Hua Cheng said, half-jokingly. "What if I'm discolored, disfigured, ugly, monstrous, and horrible. What will you do?"

At first, Xie Lian thought this line of inquiry was rather fascinating. So the overlord of the Ghost Realm, the one called the devil incarnate and feared by all in the heavens, would care about his looks? But when he thought about it deeply, he didn't think it was very funny anymore. He vaguely recalled, in one of the many rumored backstories of Hua Cheng, one said that he was a disfigured child from birth, or something along those lines. If that was true, then he must've grown up discriminated against by others. Maybe that was why he was particularly sensitive about his appearance.

TGCF Volume 1, pages 369-370

This quote is really long but I wanted to include all of it because Xie Lian's realization here is very important - Hua Cheng's issues don't stem from vanity but from being othered and subsequently abused because of his unusual red right eye. The society they're in shows many instances of ableism, racism, xenophobia and classism, where any attempted change to the status quo as well as anything that goes against "the norm" is regarded with instant suspicion and rejection - as Pei Ming puts it once, "Where there is abnormality, there is evil."

When he finally does show Xie Lian his true form, Hua Cheng is anxious about it up until Xie Lian remarks that it doesn't look bad:

Xie Lian examined him as he followed, smiling. "So, this is your real appearance." Hua Cheng paused slightly in his step. Maybe it was his imagination, but Hua Cheng's shoulders seemed to stiffen for a flash of a second. The moment didn't last, and Hua Cheng responded naturally. "I did say that the next time we met, I would greet you with my real appearance."

Xie Lian grinned and said earnestly, "Not bad." Xie Lian's tone wasn't teasing or consoling, the words were simply said. Hua Cheng gave a small smile back, and this time, it was genuinely relaxed.

TGCF Volume 2, page 103

Xie Lian's acceptance of his true form seems to have reassured Hua Cheng enough that he appears in it a lot more regularly after that, though it's always with the place where his right eye used to be carefully covered. He's also still too afraid to tell Xie Lian about their shared past and who he really is, and even more afraid to confess his feelings because he fears that then Xie Lian will no longer look at him with acceptance and instead see Hua Cheng as this:

He pointed at a little blood-red person on the wall. Right next to it, there were a bunch of messy, twisted, indiscernible characters - it looked like they had been written in a state of delirium or scrawled to vent the author's feeling during a period of extreme suffering. Based on those characters, Xie Lian could guess that the little blood-red person painted there was Hua Cheng himself, but for some unknown reason he had depicted himself as extremely ugly and disfigured.

[...] There was an ugly little blood-red figure at the bottom of the mural. It cupped a small flower in its hands, which it was offering to the statue.

TGCF Volume 6, pages 52-55

Hua Cheng having internalized this distorted "ugly freak" image of himself isn't the only thing tripping him up though. Every time he can't prevent Xie Lian from getting hurt or can't help him, Hua Cheng takes it as a personal failure on his part and immediately seeks to punish himself. Be that by lashing out at Eming, which is essentially an extension of himself:

Xie Lian stroked Eming. "Fangxin is still better suited." Fangxin remained motionless. Eming had tried so enthusiastically to offer itself up but was so blatantly rejected. It hopped back to Hua Cheng's side, weeping. Hua Cheng didn't spare it a single look before he smacked it with a backhand slap. "What are you crying about? This happened because you're useless! Trash!"

TGCF Volume 5, page 120

Or denying himself to touch Xie Lian, like after Xie Lian got accidentally hurt by Eming (an especially cruel punishment given that Hua Cheng had longed for Xie Lian for hundreds of years):

Hua Cheng, however, let go of his hand. "Don't mind them," he said to Xie Lian. "Come with me." His voice was low, the emotion behind it hard to discern. Yet the way he let go of Xie Lian's wrist was swift, almost like he'd been shaken off.

TGCF Volume 2, page 192

Repeatedly witnessing Xie Lian be brutalized and violated while he didn't yet have the power to stop it from happening traumatized Hua Cheng deeply and left him with a wrathful anger that he wields not only against those who wronged Xie Lian but also against himself for any and all perceived failures.

Now, what does all of this have to do with the quote that started it all? In it, Mu Qing accuses Hua Cheng that if they'd have kept him in the army, he would have kept watching Xie Lian "with his mind full of unspeakable filth! Disgusting!" (the fact that he describes a man having romantic feelings and sexual desires for another man in such a way comes off as extremely homophobic of course but that's not the topic of this post)

Hua Cheng, who hates Mu Qing deeply and with good reason, then not only stops his assault but actually goes on to say that he won't argue with him on that point for now. His inner conflict shows in the repeated clenching and loosening of the fingers in his fist - he's extremely angry and would usually never agree with Mu Qing, yet finds himself unable to deny his words. It's noticeable also that it's the "disgusting" that makes him freeze up.

So why would Hua Cheng, someone usually so confident and so unapologetically himself, concede this point to Mu Qing, someone he hates and who's just been viciously insulting him? I would argue that there are two possible reasons.

First of, if viewed through the lens of everything we reviewed in this post, Hua Cheng feels like he "can't argue" on this because he does desire Xie Lian and always has - while at the same time knowing that he, an ugly disfigured other that has repeatedly failed at keeping the God he's pledged his existence to safe from harm, could never be good enough to deserve being with said God like that.

Second of all, as I analyzed in my previous post, Hua Cheng's reaction to Xie Lian having seen the statues and murals is profound fear and heartbreak because he's so sure Xie Lian must now be scared of and disgusted by him. At this point in the story, Hua Cheng is still utterly convinced that his feelings aren't requited, which is something he can deal with. But what he can't bear is the prospect of his feelings, his very devotion, causing Xie Lian pain. Failing to keep Xie Lian safe from being harmed by others is bad enough, but hurting Xie Lian himself? Unforgivable. His fear that his desire for Xie Lian will be upsetting to him is so strong that even after the confession scene, his immediate reaction to Xie Lian even just mentioning the murals is "I'll go destroy them" (Volume 6, page 88), and he doesn't calm down until Xie Lian reassures them that he only saw a few of them and won't look at the others if Hua Cheng doesn't want him to.

[sweepingboy]

the day mu qing's mother passes he finds jian lan dying and manages to save the child. he's being very emotional and sentimental so he decides to keep him: creates a female form, a clone of her, and raises as his own.

he takes care of him teaches him how to fight with saber (the kid prefers a bow for some reason. whatever) one day tells him he's not his actual mother( cuocuo still calls him mom).

some time passes the clone "dies of old age" and shortly after cuocuo ascends and becomes nan yang's deputy( oh how mu qing hates that!).

general xuan zhen still keeps an eye on him, borrowing for missions occasionally, claiming that he's the only competent person in the whole palace and feng xin finds him very helpful too. he teaches him archery praises his good manners and education. his mom raised him good.

in a century he gets his own godly domain and two generals are still there to support him.

when xie lian brings jian lan to heavenly court she points at mu qing and tells he stole her child. he's forced to show his woman form but denies the accusations. she also reveals who's the father of her kis and the heavens are shaken by that awkward family dynamic. mu qing is arrested, feng xin is processing and cuocuo is confused af