#multipart wc

[unorcadox]

i know what i want / but i can’t have it yet (repeated) -- part 1 of a series, [part 2] - [part 3]

[flemingsfreckles]

Not Just a Teammate

Jessie Fleming x Reader

Preview: Jessie takes you home for the holidays to meet her parents, she just left out a few details when telling them you were coming home.

Warnings: a little angsty, some cursing

WC: 4.0k

A/N: I needed a break from trying to write the two other multipart series I have, so I wrote this. I’m probably going to be putting out more short single fic stories to keep from getting writers block on my other work. If you have any suggestions/ requests I’d be happy to hear them, sent them my way :)

“I need to tell you something and you have to promise not to be mad at me.” Your girlfriend of nearly a year whispered into your ear as you stood at the airport waiting for your bags to be unloaded from the plane. You turned around to see her looking at you, a nervous look across her face. She was biting her lower lip, her hand playing with drawstrings of her hoodie.

“You can’t just ask me to not be mad at you before I know what you did.” It wasn’t often that Jessie made you even upset let alone mad, so the fact that she was prefacing what she was about to say had you on edge.

“I didn’t do anything. It’s more what I didn’t do.” She says, looking up at you.

“Quit dragging this out, just tell me.” You were already a little overwhelmed from the long travel day you both had, her beating around the bush was pushing your nerves.

“Remember when you asked me if I had talked to my parents about you coming home with me?”

“Jessie!” You scold her, drawing a couple of looks from the people around you, lowering your voice as you continue “You didn’t tell them I was coming? Seriously?”

“No, no I did, they know you’re coming,” she pauses, you can tell there’s more to that sentence than she’s saying.

“Then what?” Now you were annoyed, you were about to be an unexpected guest at your girlfriend's parents house.

“It’s just, they called you my teammate when I called them to see if you could come home and I never corrected them.” Her sentence comes out rushed. Your eyes fly open, your girlfriend’s parents, who you were expecting to meet in less than an hour, didn’t know you were their daughter’s girlfriend.

“Your parents think I’m just your teammate? Are you fucking kidding me? Jessie Alexandra what the hell?” The volume of your voice raised again, not caring if people around you could hear, Jessie deserved to be scolded for this. Jessie throws her hands up in surrender..

“I know, I know. I was going to tell them, but I just got so nervous every time I couldn’t do it. They don’t even know that I date women, well just one woman now, singular, you.” She points at you. For a split second you forget how upset you are at her, seeing how nervous and shy she got talking about dating you.

“So your parents just think you’re bringing home a teammate for the holidays?” She just shrugs at you.

“Oh my god Jessie.” You move away from her, taking a few steps away. “I’m going to have to lie this whole trip, do you realize how fucked up that is? Why didn’t you tell me sooner? I would’ve made an excuse not to come.” You were so mad. You had asked Jessie a couple weeks back if she had asked her parents abo it you coming home. She had told you she talked with them, you had assumed that meant she fully told them, that she was bringing home her girlfriend, not just a teammate. Maybe you should’ve been more specific when asking.

“No, no of course not.” She reaches a hand out toward you but you pull back out of her reach. “I’m going to talk to them tonight. I promise.”

She holds out her pinky to you, it may seem childish, the two of you interlocking pinkies in the airport, but it had always been a thing the two of you did, a promise was a promise. You hesitate, so annoyed that she had put you in this situation. She gives you a pleading stare, her big brown eyes a special soft spot for you, you hold your pinky out to hers.

“Until you tell them, don't expect me to act like your girlfriend though.” The words leave your mouth and you see the change in Jessie’s face from guilty to upset. You stand in silence, both of you watching the bag carousel, beginning to think that everyone bag from the plane except your own had come out. You watch as Jessie puts the tip of her thumb between her teeth, biting her nail, a nervous habit of hers. Normally you would pull her hand away, giving it a loving squeeze, or politely telling her to stop. Instead, since you weren't her girlfriend at the moment, you don't, a teammate wouldn't scold her habits.

“Does that mean we’re sleeping in different beds?” The thought of all the tiny aspects that come with being a friend instead of a girlfriend start crossing your mind. You speak up but don’t turn to look at her. As a teammate and a friend, her parents probably weren’t expecting you to share a bed, you'd have to sleep alone until she sorted this out with them.

“I don’t know, they didn’t mention sleeping arrangements to me. I’m sure they’ll have the guest room made up for you. To be fair, they might kick you out of my bedroom once they know we’re together.” Jessie tries to make a joke to you, but not in the mood for her antics, you take it seriously.

“You’re 26, not 16 and we’re both girls, what do they think is going to happen?”

“It’s probably more that they don’t want to hear what might happen. And last time I checked, someone can get a little loud.” when you just look at her, not giving in to her attempt at humor with you a frown comes to her face. “I was joking babe, they have let my sibling’s partners spend the night in their rooms.”

“Don’t ‘babe’ me.” You glare at her, you were being overly mean and you knew it, but you couldn’t help it. Jessie had been so excited to invite you home for the holidays and you had been excited to go, but you were excited to go as her girlfriend, not her teammate.

The fact that she hadn't told them was causing a small part of you to be insecure. Maybe she didn't think you were good enough to bring home as a partner, maybe she didn't want to introduce you to her life in Canada. Maybe she was planning on ending your relationship and this would be the perfect start. You had never questioned your relationship with Jessie before, you felt unsettled knowing you were suddenly having these thoughts.

Jessie moves forward to the belt and she grabs off your bag, sliding it toward you before she grabs the one with her own tag on it. You were too lost in your thoughts to see the bags come on the belt. Normally you'd take Jessie’s bag for her, one of many simple chivalrous things you had incorporated into your life with her, but not today, you grabbed your own and turned to find the exit.

Standing outside, you waited for Jessie’s parents to pick you both up. Jessie waves in the direction of a car that soon pulls over and Jessie’s mom nearly comes jumping out of the passenger seat while it is still moving, making a b-line for her daughter. She pulls her into a hard hug.

“My baby is home.” You hear her say as she rocks Jessie side to side slightly.

“Hi Mom.” Jessie is laughing at her Mom’s behavior. Jessie’s dad is now standing behind his wife, waiting for his turn to say hello to his daughter. Jessie’s mom picks her head up, her eye catches yours.

“Hi, sorry I didnt mean to ignore you.” She moves out of Jessie’s arms and comes over to you arms open. You give her a quick hug and smile.

“I get it, she’s your daughter.” You wave off her Mom’s apology.

“It’s very nice to meet you.” Her parents maybe didn't know they were meeting their daughter's girlfriend but you were still overly aware that this was your first time meeting your girlfriend’s parents. Meeting the parents was a big deal, especially when Jessie was as close with her family as she was.

You hear Jessie start to introduce you to her parents, she says your name and then pauses, “She’s my,” For a second you're relieved, she was going to get the introduction over with now, she was going to correct her mistake.

“um, my, she’s, we play together and she's one of my favorite people.” She smiles in your direction. You shoot her back a smile that to her parents looks normal, they don't know any different. Jessie however, could tell your smile was fake, one that was hiding annoyance.

You all climb in the car, her parents asking questions about your flight, about both of your lives, asking how the season was treating both of you. The ride wasn't too long and you were soon pulling up a long driveway to a beautiful house, hidden back from the roadway, surrounded by huge trees.

Standing in the driveway are both of Jessie’s siblings, they both come to either side of the car, Jessie’s sister to her side, her brother to your side. They greet you and offer to take your bags.

Her brother and mom walk you around the house, giving you the tour as Jessie says hello to her family’s dogs. You see Jessie’s room, you’d seen photos of her bedroom as a child, it was more sophisticated now, less posters on the wall, less toys and clutter, but it still was very much her childhood bedroom. They showed you her siblings rooms, the kitchen, family room, and finally the guest room. Jessie was right, they had made it up for you to stay. You appreciate the fact that they had set up the room for you but you really wanted to spend the night cuddling up with Jessie, not a floor below her in a different bed. Maybe a night apart would be good, maybe it would make Jessie remember how she doesn’t sleep well without you being next to her. Maybe it’ll encourage her to tell the truth.

Jessie’s dad calls down the hall that dinner is ready and you all make your way back into the kitchen.

“Jessie said you weren’t picky, but we made a couple things since she is.” Jessie’s older brother says to you, poking fun at his sister.

“This all looks great, thank you.” You look between all her family members not sure who did the cooking. Everyone makes their plate, you let Jessie and her parents go first, silently distancing yourself from her. They head to the dining room as you start to make your plate.

As you make your way into the dining room followed by Jessie's siblings Jessie is already sitting at the table with her parents, you pick up on the conversation as you enter the room.

“Yeah no, she's great isn't she. Actually we’re um,” you hear her begin to stumble over her words again. “She and I are going to be roommates for the travel season this year.” You're not even sure why you continued to get your hopes up, she clearly was struggling getting out the words that she was your girlfriend and you were hers. Jessie sends you an apologetic look as you sit down across the table from her. You continue dinner, it feels uncomfortable to you and Jessie, but to the rest of the table it was normal, no one knew of the underlying tension between the two of you.

After dinner you all sit down playing card and board games. After a couple rounds of Jessie’s brother winning Uno, you all move to the couches just relaxing. Jessie's mom had grabbed a scrapbook off the shelf and was shamelessly showing you all the baby photos of Jessie, ones of her playing soccer, running, playing in the yard, holding a hockey stick, all the small moments of her childhood. You badly want to gush over the photos as a girlfriend, but you kept it reserved, not mentioning the thoughts of how cute your kids would be some day if they looked like her.

“I’ll be right back, going to let the dog outside.” Jessie says, her voice sounds different, you can't pinpoint why. Once you finish looking through the scrapbook, Jessie’s parents ask if you need anything before they head up to bed. You decline and thank them for the dinner and hospitality.

As Jessie’s parents head upstairs to their bedroom, you realize that you were going to have to wait until tomorrow for Jessie to tell them. She had broken the pinky promise you had made in the airport. Finding it odd that Jessie hadn’t come back in a few minutes, you stand up to look for her. You see her standing outside on the deck off of the kitchen.

You open the glass door, Jessie is standing, forearms resting against the fencing of the deck, head in her hands.

“Just so you know, if you're not planning to keep the pinky promise you made me, that's going to be a problem, and I’ll be happy to sleep in the guest room. I trust you when we do that.” She doesn't say anything back to you, you notice a slight shake to her shoulders as you watch her back. You walk up to her, standing close enough that your shoulder grazed against hers. She pulled her head up from her hands, she had tears trailing down her cheeks. The image of her bringing herself to tears trying to make you happy by telling her parents, immediately took away the built up anger you were harboring toward her.

“Oh Jess.” You let your thumb swipe the tears from her face.

“I’m trying.” She gets out words between gasps for air. “I am, I just, it's like I can't breathe when I go to say it. What if they hate me for it? What if I’m not their daughter anymore?” More tears ran down her face. Your heart felt like it shattered watching her cry, having those thoughts run through her brain.

You couldn't imagine how she had felt. Your parents knew you were going to date women since you were little and came home gushing over other girls, not thinking there was something different about that, they hadn't cared and you didn't need to go through any coming out process with them. Your privilege in that was becoming very clear to you at the moment. You couldn't imagine having to do this at 26.

“Jessie, look at me.” Her eyes meet yours. “I love you. I can’t stand here and tell you I know how you're feeling because honestly I don't, I never came out to my parents. I am here though, I want to help you with this. I want you to feel comfortable telling them.” You wish you could take away her fears, give them to yourself, let her have the easy experience.

“I’m really sorry I’ve been pretty shitty to you since I found out they didn’t know. That wasn't fair of me to do. I got nervous thinking you maybe didn’t want them to meet me as your partner, that maybe you were ashamed of me or something, I got in my own head and got upset. I shouldn’t have been pushing you to come out to anyone.”

“It's okay, it wasn't fair of me to not tell them. I really do want them to know how much I love you.” She shivers against your body. The sun's disappearance had made it much colder outside. You take the jacket you had on off, draping it over her shoulders.

“I’ll be inside if you want to talk or anything, I’m not mad anymore, I was, but it wasn’t right for me to be angry. I hope you know that.” You turn back to the house, leaving her to continue thinking, you knew she needed the space to sort herself out, you couldn’t stay there hovering, it wouldn't help her.

You open the door and look back at Jessie one more time. Her shoulders are not shaking anymore, you can see her breath in the cold air. You step inside and close the door behind you.

“You're not just teammates are you?” You are startled by the voice of Jessie’s sister, she's standing in the kitchen, glass of water in her hand.

“What?” you heard her but not sure what to respond, thats the only word that comes out of your mouth.

“You and Jess. You’re together, right?” She glances in the direction of where her older sister still stood outside.

“I mean, I’ve seen Jessie around plenty of her teammates, she doesn't look at any of them the way she looks at you. She’s also never brought one home for the holidays before. Not to mention, she never shuts up about you when I call her. She finds every opportunity to talk about you. She talks about you like you are the sun. I think you are the sun to her.”

“She’s the sun to me, she's everything.” Accidentally giving her sister the answer. “I probably should have waited and let her tell you.”

“She already came out to me, I just didn’t know about you. I think she's been indirectly trying to tell me for months, she just gets nervous, she gets in her own head about stuff like that and ends up working herself up and then panics.”

“I know.” A silence falls between the two of you, just the sound of the clock ticking in the background.

“Is she okay? I didn’t mean to be watching you two but I came down for water and I saw you out there wiping her tears.”

“She’s just having a hard time telling your parents about all of it. I was under the impression they knew and I had gotten upset with her for not telling them. She only told me this morning that they didn’t know I was her girlfriend.” You pull out a barstool along the kitchen island and sit down putting your hands in your head.

“Oh.”

“Yeah and I’ve been an ass to her about it, which was really a terrible thing for me to do to her.”

“They probably already know, the same way I already knew.” She took a sip from her glass and placed it back on the counter. “I know it probably doesn’t make it easier but It’s not like she had ever been boy crazy. Soccer was always the excuse but I think-”

She’s cut off as the sound of the door opening behind you has you both turning your head to where Jessie was coming through the door. She doesn’t even look at either of you, she speeds right past and you hear her go up the stairs.

You look back at her sister who just gives you a shrug. You’re about to stand up off the stool and follow her when you hear footsteps coming back down the stairs. Except this time it’s more than just the sound of Jessie’s feet. Her own steps are accompanied by the sound of other feet and the questions of Jessie’s parents.

“Jessie what are you doing? We were about to be in bed.” You hear her dad say as Jessie walks into the kitchen, both of her hands behind her, physically dragging her parents with her. They both look confused. Jessie marches them in your direction and stops right in front of you, letting go of her parent’s hands and moving next to you, leaving the four of you to be staring at each other. You see Jessie’s older brother pop his head around the corner, he must have heard the commotion and decided to come see what was happening.

“Mom. Dad.” She looks between them and then at you. “I didn't introduce you all properly before. Yes we play together, and yes she’s my favorite person, but she’s also my girlfriend.” She grabs your hand as she lets the word finally leave her lips. Her hand is clammy with a slight shake to it.

When no one says anything for a minute you start to get nervous. If this was about to go bad and you had pushed Jessie to tell them you wouldn’t be able to forgive yourself. If you pushed her and all her fears came true, you couldn’t imagine how you’d begin to handle it. Jessie’s nose sniffles and you look up at her to see her eyes watering again.

Jessie’s dad moved forward to give her a hug. “Don’t cry kiddo, it’s okay.” His hand rubs her back.

“You’re not mad?” Jessie’s voice is so soft. Muffled into her dads shirt.

“Jessie don’t be silly! No, of course we’re not mad. A little surprised maybe, but mad? No.” Her mom joins in the conversation. “We’re always going to love you.” Jessie moves from her Dad’s arms into her Mom’s. Her hand is still tightly gripping yours. Jessie’s mom releases her hold on her daughter and turns her attention to you.

“It’s nice to properly meet you.” You stand up from the barstool and hug her. The hug is tighter than the one at the airport. When she pulls back from you she takes your hand that isn’t being held by Jessie and holds it between both of hers. “Anyone Jessie deems good enough for herself, is welcome in my house. We all know too well how picky she can be.”

“Mom.”

“I’m joking.” She looks at her daughter before turning back to you. “Seriously, welcome to our family.”

“Thank you. I really appreciate you having me.”

Jessie’s mom drops your hand from between hers and steps back making room for Jessie’s dad to move in front of you. For some reason meeting him for the second time feels way more intimidating. You extend your hand, feeling that now it was appropriate to provide a handshake.

“Oh please, Canadians are huggers.” He laughs at your extended hand and opens his arms. You give him a hug as well and you feel the nerves that had been building since Jessie let out the secret start to subside.

“Jess, the guest room is made up, but obviously if you want to share your bed instead that’s fine, you’ll just need to grab the bath towels and extra pillows we laid out from the guest bedroom. Now I’m going back to bed, if anyone else has any news they’d like to share either speak now or wait until the morning.” Her mom looks around between you and Jessie and then back at her two other children.

Her parents leave the kitchen and return to bed. Her siblings also retreat back to wherever they had been before. You stand up and turn to Jessie pulling her into a hug. You feel her relax into your arms, putting her weight into your body.

“I’m proud of you.” You whisper into her ear. You let her go from your grasp and hold her out from you by the shoulders to look at her face. “Ready for bed?” She gives you nod and then leads you out of the kitchen and to her bedroom.

You patiently wait in Jessie’s bed for her to finish up in the bathroom. She comes out, turning off the light and climbs under the sheets. “I love you.” She says, you're able to barely make out her face in the dark of the room. You feel her roll over, pushing her back and butt up against you. It was common that you were the big spoon, but especially after the day you both hand you wanted to hold her tonight. You move yourself further into her, wrapping your body around hers. Gently draping your arm across her waist and holding her, you both let out a sigh.

“I love you.” You respond back, placing a gentle kiss to her shoulder and soon after falling asleep to the sound of Jessie’s breathing.

[vecnuthy]

Steddie western au that I might turn into a little multipart something || wc: 846 ||

Steve knew that going to the stream was stupid. The last drop of water had fallen from his canteen to his tongue eight hours ago, though, and the desert sun was ruthless in its gaze.

This land was difficult and unforgiving. It bred people who were cut from cloth as soft as suede but embedded with glass shards, and Steve had been cut so many times. His body and soul bore the scars from his father, his mother, his former fiancée, his former friends that either wanted him to be something he wasn't or tried to force a change onto him. People did what they could to make it, but Steve refused to accept those terms and vehemently stood against those conditions. And they knew it. Knew he was a good guy. Knew they could push him, provoke him, that he'd eventually bite back, wrap his own shard-flecked scarf around their neck and pull if necessary. Steve had lost too many fights, but he'd started winning them, too.

The tracks on the ground weren't terribly fresh, compared to what he and Wendy left in their wake, but something felt off to Steve. Stopping there would mean life, could mean death, but not stopping certainly lead to death.

"We'll be quick, girl," he muttered to his horse as he dismounted, pushing aside the sense of unease in his stomach.

His hands dipped into the babbling brook ahead of Wendy, then he drank. Deeply. Felt the cool water go all the way down his throat and crash into his empty stomach. He made the next handful splash over his face and sighed in relief, breathed in the smell of scrubby grass and dirt.

The cloth around his neck came off, and he dipped it into the water. The wind was warm and dry, but it sent a chill through him as it licked at the sweat-soaked hair against his neck. He tied the rag back on, eyes sweeping the land and seeing nothing but the trees along the water then vast openness beyond.

Steve grabbed a piece of jerky and his canteens. Wendy grazed as he filled them and chewed.

It was quiet. Water gurgled. Wendy's hooves crunched grass. She shook her mane and seemed at ease.

It felt off with no evidence as to why.

They couldn't stay there, he knew that. Shouldn't linger, he knew that. But his bladder was heavy. He took the pistol from his holster, cocked the hammer, saw Wendy's head pick up at the sound. She watched him move toward the evergreens.

Her hooves shuffled.

Steve stopped, the pistol raised at nothing. At anything.

It didn't feel right.

He only moved forward once Wendy's head dropped back down to the grass. He stopped once he reached a tree and listened hard for several moments.

Nothing.

Pistol still ready, he undid his belt buckle and started to undo the front of his pants to relieve himself.

Click

He froze, blood running colder than the creak behind him at the unmistakable mechanical click of a hammer.

Steve turned his head to the side, eye to eye with the cold black barrel of another's pistol. His heart rabbited in his chest, breath coming fast. He only saw the person's hand at first because the rest was still hidden behind the tree. Steve dedicated a split second to noticing the black letters on their fingers before his instincts kicked into overdrive, and Steve knocked the gun away. A resulting shot rang out, but Steve held on to the guy's wrist, snapped his own pistol in front of him, and darted around the tree, only to be met with an apparent second gun and two big brown eyes pointed directly at him.

"Don't," the other man bit out. The lower part of his face was covered by a black bandanna, but his eyes were hard, determined.

"Why not?"

Steve couldn't help but cringe at his less than ideal position. His gun in his left hand touched the guy's chest. His assailant's right arm pressed his own gun against Steve's cheek. Steve dug his thumbnail into the guy's left wrist, which probably wasn't the smartest thing to do, but it gave Steve a sense of satisfaction in how he winced in pain.

"I'm not the one who pulled the gun. All I wanted was water and to take a le--"

"What allegiance do you have to the Harringtons?"

Steve's face twisted in confusion and annoyance. Why would this guy be asking about his parents?

"The mark on your horse," he clarified gruffly.

Steve clenched his jaw. Wendy's flank still had the family's symbol painted on her.

"None at all. She was the only thing worth taking."

The man studied him, searching his face for something, then his eyes grew bigger. "You're the son," he said himself, clarity painting his voice.

Steve continued to stare the other man down, saw how his sharp eyes crinkled -- he was smiling. Heard it in his voice when he asked low and dangerous, enticing, "Want some revenge?"

Revenge.

Yes. Steve wanted revenge.

[starfried]

Through and Through

first fic i've written in a VERY long time hehe. this part is a lil silly and mostly just a prologue, next part will focus more on reader and law's relationship! this part and the next part take place during law's novel, before he sets off to sea. criticism welcomed & encouraged!

slowburn, childhood friends to lovers, multipart, not proofread (im on mobile xP, will comb through it later), no use of (y/n)/(name), gn reader (they/them pronouns, no gendered nicknames)

wc: 3.2k

You regularly found yourself lamenting the fact that you were born on a winter island. No matter how many layers you wore, or how thick your boots were, you were always freezing. Sure, the snow was beautiful when you watched it fall through a window in a warm house. But here you find yourself, lost in the woods, cursing every single snowflake that dares to cover up your previous footprints.

You kick a thick tree root in frustration, only to tumble over when your foot gets caught in it.

Great. Lovely. Whatever. You're cold, hungry and tired. If this is how you die, then oh well.

...

...

...

"I think they're dead."

I'd rather be dead than here. You think to yourself.

Something sharp jabs into your ribs.

"OW!"

"They're not dead!"

"Are you stupid, Penguin?! That's not how you check if someone's alive!"

You lift your head to scowl at them, but are quickly thrown off. Three boys and a...polar bear?

"And you-" the boy in the spotted hat says, pointing at you, "-are YOU stupid?"

"Huh?" You don't even have time to question the bear.

"Did you seriously just fall asleep in the middle of the woods?! No shelter, no fire, not even any food?"

"N-No! I...fell. I fell and haven't gotten up yet."

He narrows his eyes at you.

"You're covered in a layer of snow. If it takes you that long to get up after falling, you really need to exercise more."

Oh. You really are covered in a layer of snow. You push yourself up from the ground, only to stumble over again as soon as you put weight on your foot. Luckily for you, the polar bear was able to catch you before you faceplant into the snow.

"I gotcha!" The polar bear says.

"A talking bear?!" You shout in surprise, pushing yourself away. Ultimately, you end up face first in the snow again.

"Oh...I'm sorry...you'd rather let yourself fall than be near me. I get it. I'm pretty gross after all..."

"Huh?! No, I'm just...surprised?" You reply, completely dumbfounded.

The boy in the spotted hat pinches the bridge of his nose in frustration. "Just...ugh. Bepo, carry them back to the cabin with us."

"Whoa, whoa, whoa!" You exclaim. "What cabin? You're taking me to a cabin in the middle of the woods? Can't you just...take me back to town?"

"That's over an hour walk," Spotted-Hat replies, "I doubt you can walk that far. And even if you could, the sun's almost down. I'm not going to drag you through the woods when we can barely even see."

"But...I just think that's really suspicious, y'know? Dragging me off to your cabin at night. That...sounds dangerous."

"Don't worry!" The boy with the hat covering his face chirps. "If we were gonna kill you, we would've done it already!"

"O-oh..."

"Stop whining!" Spotted-Hat barks, "What kind of doctor would I be if i just left you out here to die? You're just gonna have to trust us. Maybe this'll teach you not to wander aimlessly around the woods."

Reluctantly, you end up learning a bit about the four boys. Their names are Law, Bepo, Penguin, and Shachi. They're all relatively new to Swallow Island and happen to work small jobs in the city. Law, with his medical knowledge, wraps up your sprained ankle and chastises you for frost nipped ears and nose.

"Seriously, don't you have a scarf? You've lived here your whole life and you still can't understand how serious frostbite is?"

You even get to meet the great inventor Wolf, who's actually pretty well-known in the city. Though he grumbles about having to tend to 'yet another brat', he drives you back into town the next day with little complaints.

It wouldn't be the last they saw of you, though. Far from it in fact. In an attempt to repay them for helping you, you would slowly worm your way into their daily lives.

Especially Law's.

[happy-beeeps]

Late Night Talking

Summary: after a chance encounter, you spend some time getting to know the strange clone who showed up at your door.

Warnings/rating: alcohol, cursing, vaguely suggestive content

A/N: this is going to be a multipart, but not quite a longfic! I'm in love with this man I can't do this.

WC: 1.7k

It’s late when the buzzer at your apartment door goes off with the tone noting an incorrect keycode. You hear it again, loud and shrill, and you’d be worried if you didn’t hear your roommate Flora’s drunken laughter following it. There’s a male voice too, deep and warm, and you’re happy the sweet medic has found someone to share the night with. You’re both medics, and both conveniently on leave at the same time following the last mission you went on with the 501st and 212th. She had needed to blow off some steam, and was happy to do so following an invitation from her 212th crew. You had turned down a similar invitation from the 501st, having dealt with nearly enough of Fives’ humor for the time being.

You open the door for them, and are greeted by the sight of Flora, brown curls bouncing and cheeks flushed as she presses against the gigantic hunk of man in your doorframe. From the looks of it, he’s a clone, but not quite like any clone you’ve ever seen.

“Making friends?” you ask, and she blushes as she enters. 

“This is Wrecker,” her voice is soft and slurred as she leans on your shoulder, “He’s walking me home.”

“It’s the gentlemanly thing to do,” the clone named Wrecker smiles, bashfully rubbing a hand behind his neck. He’s drunk too, and you’re surprised a man of this size can get this drunk.

Although, Flora can put away a drink.

“That’s very sweet of you Wrecker,” you smile, and you can practically feel Flora’s cheeks burning as he all but devours her with his eyes. “Flora, who’s going to walk him home?”

“That would be me.”

The voice that answers is raspy, tinged with annoyance coated in endearment. Wrecker stands from where he blocks the entire door frame to reveal another man, shorter than Wrecker but taller than any clone you’ve worked with before. He has a short crop of silver hair, and a tattoo you can’t quite make out over his eye.

“Crosshair.” He offers, but does not move to extend a hand. He does, however, take the opportunity to rake his eyes up and over your figure. You can’t deny the chill that runs down your spine. “Alright Wrecker, we need to get back to the barracks.”

“Or you could stay?” Flora offers, her hand reaching past you and pulling Wrecker into your apartment. For such a large man, he follows her easily inside. She leads him down the hallway to her room, hardly offering you a second glance. This leaves you standing in front of Crosshair, who merely rolls his eyes and huffs a laugh at his brother practically running behind Flora.

“Well, I’ll be on my way.” Crosshair moves to walk down the hall to the lift, but you stop him before he can.

“Wait,” your voice comes as a shock to him, and he turns to face you. “It’s late, just stay the night. We’ve got plenty of blankets. Our couch is more comfortable than the beds in the barracks.”

“Spend a lot of time there?” While his joke would normally be accompanied by a hurtful tone, his barb lacks venom. Instead, there’s something nearly flirtatious in it. As if he’s asking if you’d even be interested in him.

“Meh. 501st boys aren’t really my type.” You move out of the way of the door, an open invitation for him to step inside once more.

There’s a beat, and he obliges. 

Crosshair moves quietly through your space, as if he regards every one of your belongings as if it’s made of fine crystal.

You move to grab a glass from your cabinet. “Do you drink?”

“Heavily.”

“Excellent.”

He takes the whiskey from you, pouring your glass first then his, and you realize the gentlemanly gene might not have just gone to Wrecker. You both settle on the couch, your feet pulled up on the couch as you regard him. He’s a startling kind of handsome up close, he looks sharp and nearly lethal. You feel a deep urge to reach out and touch him, trace the heavy contours of his cheekbones. You don’t, of course, settling instead on tracing the lines etched into the glass.

“I’m sorry about him,” his words are sudden, his movements slow. He jerks his eyes towards the direction of the hallway. 

“Don’t be, he seems sweet. I’m sorry about her. She’s on and off with someone on the 212th.”

“We’re not on Coruscant often. It’s for the best.”

“Oh,” your voice sinks at his admission, and his eyes dart to yours from where they rested on his glass.

“Disappointed?”

“It seems too soon to tell, but maybe.”

He smirks, and sets his glass down on the table in front of him. He disregards the coasters, but wipes the bottom of the glass before placing it, a quirk you find intriguing. 

“So, what battalion are you and your brother part of?”

“We’re… special forces. Squad 99.”

“Ah, secretive,” you joke, and he offers a small laugh in response.

“I’m a sharpshooter.”

“That’s a high stress job, a lot of my boys get tension headaches when they miss.”

“Good thing I don’t miss.”

There’s a beat where you should respond but you don’t, merely scoffing in response as you lean back on the couch.

“You’re a medic too then?”

“With the 501st. We’re on leave right now,” you set your glass down next to his, using the coaster, and move to turn the holo on. “I’m not on Coruscant often.”

“Pity.”

“Disappointed?”

His eyes meet yours now as the light of the holo casts blue shadows across his face. “Considerably.”

You scoff, but blush all the same. “You don’t even know me.”

“I bet I know you better than you think.”

“Oh yeah? I’d like to see you try.”

He picks up the glass and takes a large, gulping sip. He sets it down again, without wiping the bottom, and smirks at you. You feel suddenly so watched, as if he’s an apex predator you’ve let into your home.

“You like things clean, not because you’re a medic but because you feel a need for control. You’ve watched me set my drink down without a coaster and made a decided effort to remind me without being rude. Most likely an only child, maybe an orphan, and you’re older than Flora. You keep plants around because you like the thought of something alive greeting you at home but Flora is allergic to fur. You drink whiskey because it’s sweeter than people give it credit for, like you.” He moves closer to you on the couch, his hand going to trace circles on your knee. “You’ve slept with maybe one clone, and he was not as impressive as you’d hoped, and it’s been a long time since.” 

The tracing pauses and your breath hitches in your throat at the pause in movement, and at how close he is. He smells like something smokey and metallic, he smells like you should be afraid of him but your body refuses. His voice is breathy as he continues, leaning in. “I am not like the last one.”

“I don’t even remember his name.”

“But you will remember mine.”

You move to kiss him so fast he’s almost surprised. The kiss is desperate on both ends, it must have been a long time for him too. He’s feverish, impatient, the kiss chaste and rough, but never mean. He’s gentle in response to every breathy pull, his hands trace along your jaw softly after every nip on your lip. Your hands move to drag along his back, grateful that he seems to have left the top half of his armor back at the barracks. Your hands splay across the taught muscle on his back, he’s lithe and his muscle moves like a cord along him. You pause for a moment and pull away, each pausing to catch your breath.

“How did you know all of that?”

“You learn a lot about a person through the scope of a blaster.”

“Hmm…” your fingers trace idly along his shoulders, “almost right, but the plants are actually Flora’s. And I’ve been with two troopers.”

“I was close,” he offers, and you smile back. “And close earned you that.”

“Next time I’ll think of something better.”

“So there’ll be a next time?”

“If you’ll have me.”

It’s an easy decision. He spends the night with you in your room, though you don’t sleep together. He’s not particularly snuggly, but when you come too in the early hours of the morning to his attempts to rise, he’s soft when he extracts your head from his chest, doing his best not to wake you. Somehow, he looks softer in the early morning. The slivers of sun from between your window shades cast him in an almost blurry light, and he’s typing something on your datapad when you squint an eye at him.

“Nice try,” you murmur, and he turns to face you, surprised that you’re awake.

“Wanted to let you sleep, you didn’t tell me it was your first night back.”

“You didn’t tell me it was your last,” he’s packing quickly, and it’s far too early for even a call back to the barracks. He’s being sent away, and soon.

“It’s easier this way,” he taps the datapad, “that’s a comm channel. It’s secure, but I’m not normally available. When I’m back–”

“Save it,” you gesture for him to reach towards you and he does. You press a soft kiss against his lips, and he nearly melts at the gesture. He’s so different than last night, almost full of regret that he has to leave your bed. You motion to one of the small pots on your nightstand with a white lid, “bacta and herb ointment. It’s for my knee aches. I give it to my boys with trigger finger. Take it.”

He opens his mouth to deny you and you flip tummy down on your bed, your voice muffled into your pillow. “Something to remember by. Now get out, I don’t want to have to watch you leave.”

He does. He leaves quietly, but not without pressing a warm, lingering touch to the back of your calf, exposed to the air as your leg hooks around your blanket.

“We’ll be seeing each other.” He murmurs, and you’re not sure if it’s meant to assuage you to him, but it works for both, a salve for the tinge of hurt neither expected to feel this morning.

[enqmind]

Okay, more fic. This is the one I should have done first, but what can you do?

Will likely turn out to be a multipart. (Word to the wise, I'm very easily bribed with reblogs, follows and kind words -wink wink-)

Ghost/Female Reader WC: 831 18+ content

Warnings: Suicide attempt by reader, gaslighting(?), manipulation(?), Local Manc has worst possible reaction to a suicide attempt

Reader notes: Thin enough to fit into a standard bathtub, light enough to be lifted from a standard bathtub by Ghost, mentally ill, might turn out to be pale skinned later (haven't decided yet. If so, feel free to ignore. I'm not here to gatekeep.)

One Man's Treasure

Next

 The hallway was dingy, even with the lights popping on at the slightest movement. According to the landlord, the lights were dimmed at night to prevent their circadian rhythms from being disturbed.

 Sure.

 Nothing to do with the cost of living crisis. Ghost believed them, thousands wouldn’t.

 He trudged along, each door uniform and bland as he headed to his flat.

 He was almost at his own door as a pocket of shadow caught his attention.

 Door after door after door with the same shiny printed veneer seemed to oddly glow in the dim light. One next to his had a dark shadow lining one side.

 He stalked over.

 Ajar.

 Of course. Fuck he was tired.

 He was about to pull it closed when a scent wafted through his mask.

 Lavender, vetiver and the familiar base note of blood.

 Who lived here again?

 The image of a woman rose in his mind. Pretty, polite, always offering a greeting smile if they happened to run into each other. Sometimes she seemed like she wanted to ask him something, but nothing ever came of it.

 That’s all he knew. She kept to herself and never seemed to have guests over.

 A perfectly functional neighbour.

 He pushed the door open.

 The dim light in the hall let him adjust to the darkness of her flat quickly. It was messy and a certain staleness passed under the perfumed blood scent.

 A soft flickering glow caught his eye, emanating from under the bathroom door. A rectangle of white standing out in the dinge.

 He crept through the living room, eyes constantly moving through the gloom for signs of danger. Ears pricked for any noise.

 A sigh from the bathroom.

 Ghost hesitated, but the smell of blood was strong enough to get his hand on the door handle and swing it open. Ready for any threat.

 All he found was his neighbour in the bath. Wearing only bra and knickers and lying in orange tinted water. A stanley knife dropped on the floor in a pool of blood.

 There was a lot of blood.

 Another sigh.

 But not enough to kill. Not even enough to knock her out, really.

 He approached warily, seeing a mostly empty bottle of spirits sitting on the far side of the bath.

 That explained both her unconsciousness and all the blood.

 Carefully, he took her closest wrist and examined it.

 She hadn’t nicked anything important, despite her best efforts. The lines went vertically, tracing the likely paths of the veins down her forearms. She was clearly seeking results.

 No shit, Sherlock. She lives alone, who the hell could she even get attention from?

 Wasn’t that the point of leaving the front door ajar?

 In the middle of the night on a Tuesday?

 It wasn’t worth thinking too much about. He needed to get her awake and to A&E, not ruminate on her train of thought. That was the psych ward’s problem.

 He rose to his feet and went to pull the light cord.

 The square of white on the outside of the door was a piece of paper stuck to it with some patterned tape.

 ‘Do not enter. Corpse within. Call 999.’

 A sigh more like a gasp came from behind him, accompanied by a splash.

 He turned to see her hugging herself, almost snuggling into the lukewarm water as her head started to slip under.

 He grabbed her by the shoulders and dragged her into a sitting position.

 Her eyes fluttered open and she blinked at him, head clearly addled by alcohol and blood loss.

 Then she smiled at him. Lit by the candles that drew him to her in the first place, she looked radiant.

 “You came,” she whispered, eyes glittering with affection.

 She threw her arms around his neck and pressed a kiss to his cheek that felt like nothing at all.

 She drew back with a wry chuckle and shy smile.

 “I thought you’d be taller.” A giggle. “But not by much.”

 He could almost see it reflected in her eyes despite the low light of the scented candles.

 The white skull of his mask making him look like death incarnate.

 How happy she looked, how relieved to be face to face with the Grim Reaper…

 He wrapped his arms around her and she snuggled into his chest.

 “Thank you,” she murmured. “I was so scared I’d fail.”

 He felt something crack inside his mind.

 Hers was a life she didn’t want.

 Ghost moved an arm under her knees and picked her up out of the bath, blood tinged water sluicing off her and onto him and the floor.

 He didn’t know why she didn’t want it.

 She clung onto him, eyes widening.

 “Where are we going?”

 Frankly, he didn’t care.

 “For now, Purgatory,” he answered. “Later? Who knows.”

 He felt her relax into his arms.

 “Okay.”

 All he knew was that if she didn’t want this life, he’d be more than happy to make it his.

[inklessletter]

Leave all your love and your longing behind

Pairing: steddie | WC: 1.8k | TW: eddie lives, not canon compliant, hurt/comfort, complicated break up, the one that got away, right person wrong time, it gets worse before it gets better, eventually happy ending, multipart/chapter

It always starts the same, doesn't it? Steve and Eddie grow closer after hell almost swallows Hawkins. And there's this aftermath, this brief period in which no one dares to think about the future because after everything it is something bizarre to think about. And it is so easy to get caught up in that shiny, fragile bubble where no one has to think about stupid things like money or school. And it is in that haze when they fall madly in love.

Because of course they do. 

But the future does come anyway, and school resumes, and some of them decide to move to another state for college. Most of them need it. Most hearts break. The Byers come back to Hawkins just to finish the job and they go away again, and with them, the Wheelers go out too. 

Robin tells Steve that she's going to leave for college. She asks him if he wants to go with her, that there's a place for him wherever she goes, and for Eddie, too. Steve hugs her, and kisses her, and tells her that he can’t leave. 

That one destroys Steve. That night Eddie holds him tight and makes no comment when silent tears that clearly Steve fights back roll down his temples. When he finally asks with a strained, wet, husky voice, to no one in particular “they’re all gonna leave me eventually, aren’t they?” Eddie shuts his eyes as hard as he can and hugs him tighter.

Eddie doesn’t really know how to make him understand that they’re not leaving him. He doesn’t know how to get that abandonment from under his skin, and ironically wants to skin his parents alive for imprinting that there, for making it so easy for him to believe that his presence is made to be only temporary.

That idea is still there when two years later, Dustin goes away for college. This time, Steve doesn’t cry. He smiles, and makes sure he’s got everything packed and they exchange annoyed sighs, but they hug so fiercely despite their sarcastic retorts and Eddie has never had any siblings, but he sees those two and he knows what it should be like.

But no, he doesn't cry. He turns to Eddie with a sad smile once the van is no longer on sight and goes back to work.

Eddie smiles and asks him if he’s okay, and even if he’s not, because Eddie can tell, Steve nods and goes away after kissing him on the lips.

And he stays there, watching him go, not knowing many things. Especially how to tell Steve that he, too, needs to leave Hawkins.

Eddie has no future in Hawkins. He will always be miserable there, always the first to blame, always the origin of every sin, his windows always broken, his car vandalized, unable to keep a job. It’s been years and that godforsaken place still treats him like a murderer. He’s persona non grata, and his uncle, too.

Of course Eddie has to leave.

And he is torn apart because in this strange time, in this bubble, Steve has fallen in love with his hometown again. Eddie won’t tell Steve how much that hurts because those were the same people that once wanted his head on a spike. At a certain level, they still do. At least they’re not violent anymore, they have to bear with him existing there.

But Steve, oh, he's seen first hand innocent people lose their homes, their siblings. He has seen people losing hope and their eyes going dull and sad and he has left his skin and bones behind to help them out. He helped the kids that couldn't get away from the summer in this hellhole and made a basketball team, and organized little tournaments just for them. And he's loved there. Kids love him, and he loves helping kids. He’s helped them and their families more than anyone else there. He brought happiness and children laughing and cheering back to open spaces.

He has a purpose there. Kids are his purpose.

And Eddie is no fool, he knows that. He shares the bed with Steve who stores stars in his eyelids, and smiles talking about the kids, and what he did and didn't do, and Eddie hates the fact that he can't be there because no one but Steve and Lucas actually want him there.

Eddie hates that Steve knows that too, he sees the watery smile in Eddie's face when Steve tells him about his day, and the sadness in his heart bleeding into the voice he uses to say that he's happy that Steve had such a great day, and that he loves him.

They both know, and neither of them has the strength to really stop it. 

They have no future. 

And they both know.

One day, Steve comes home and Eddie has packed everything. Sometimes, Eddie wishes Steve didn’t come home early that day, that he could leave without a trace. They hadn’t talked about it before, and Eddie hated, hated how he saw himself reflected in Steve’s eyes. He wanted so badly to ask him to follow him, because he couldn’t stay and both knew that. But the picture of Steve happy with his kids, telling Eddie everything at the end of the day, beaming—No, no. Eddie couldn’t ask Steve. Eddie wouldn’t, not now that he was happy.

Who the fuck was Eddie anyway to even think about asking him that, huh? Who the fuck did he think he was? No.

No.

No.

They just stare into each other, and Steve smiles, because after everything, they both know that it is not a lack of love. They know for sure that they would die for each other, because they once almost did, and they would do it again. That haze is broken and the future is now a thing, just not for them.

And they both know, but Eddie wishes Steve didn’t, because when he says ‘thank you for staying so long’ Eddie can do nothing but crack.

Eddie is cracked now because he’s hurting him and Steve is letting himself be hurt.

So, no. Eddie doesn’t ask Steve to follow him. 

Steve doesn’t ask Eddie to stay.

They stare at each other hovering over a crack bigger and scarier than any other that has threatened Hawkins before.

Both know that they’re not just breaking up. Oh, no. It hurts Eddie at a core level that Steve knows him too damn well to not touch him, and not saying ‘I love you’, but instead asking him, begging him, really not to become a stranger.

It hurts Eddie, because he can’t just keep in touch.They’re not just breaking up. Oh, no. No, to Eddie, this is more. Eddie leaving Hawkins is Eddie leaving his own name behind, it’s him breaking up with his scattered, found family and asking them not to look for him, because he knows what a terrible person he is for making Steve sad. No, Eddie deserves to lose them all. If Eddie leaves, it’s Eddie who must suffer, and, well, yes, he’s running again, but he’s also facing what comes after.

Loneliness.

He has to stop in the middle of the road because he can’t stop crying. He considers making a U turn and coming back to Steve, but he’s miserable there. He’s no one. He’s not dead but he feels on a daily basis that he wishes he was.

He forces to remind himself that he’s doing this because otherwise he’s not going to have a future. He forces himself to believe that he only needs time for him, for this crack to heal. 

For him to be okay.

It’s funny when years after, he eventually is. Okay, that is. 

He becomes a writer. He writes about adventures and publishes under a pseudonym. He lives in a coastal town, because big cities are way too much for him and people scare him. He's there, and no one knows him and he's happy. He tried Chicago for a while, it’s just not for him. 

He's content.

It all goes to shit when he sees Robin one day, she's passing by his town, and his whole world crashes, because it happens that Robin doesn't hate him for breaking his soulmate's heart eleven years ago. No, she's friendly, and awkward, and she's just how he remembers her, like time hasn’t passed on her. She’s a music teacher now, and has just broken up with her girlfriend of two months. She makes jokes about her dating life, and Eddie laughs with her, unsure. He tells her ‘at least you’ve got one’ and she laughs. They drink a second beer, she pays.

Then Eddie asks her about them. Robin speaks of Dustin becoming a teacher in California, and Jonathan owning a tiny record store that is going bigger because he has two employees working for him. He talks about Erica being valedictorian at her career and Mike and Will living together now. He talks about Nancy coming from Afghanistan for the weekend because it's that week in which the whole bunch meet together.

And this year, it's about Steve, because they're all headed to Indianapolis, where there is a friendly basketball tournament between schools all over the State. It is a big thing, apparently, and Steve is representing Hawkins. Sinclair is their best player, because of course he is. Robin says that it may be a big opportunity for both of them, maybe this is the year that Lucas will have a big offer, and there are a lot of people interested in both. Lucas and Steve.

Max is still there, she never left Hawkins. Eddie gapes when he hears that Lucas and her got married last spring, he never thought of her as the one who wants to marry.

And Robin then casually invites him to come, to see them. She says it'll be fun, and everyone will be happy to see him.

Eddie tells her that not everyone. And Robin takes his hand and assures him that ‘yes, Eddie. Everyone.’

It's when Eddie dares to ask if she's really "passing by", and Robin just smiles. She leaves an envelope to him that he only dares to open when she's already gone after they hug tight.

"No pressure" it's written on the back. He opens it. It's a train ticket, and a reservation in a camp where, apparently, everyone is staying.

In Indianapolis.

The train leaves the following day.

Eddie wonders if going there is the right thing to do, but he’s doing that when he's already in the train, watching the landscapes move fast through the window.

He closes his eyes, and sighs, wishing with all his heart that he’s not a stranger to them.

To him.

To Steve.

---

@mentallyundone

[formula1bby]

Fortune Favors the Brave Ch. 1

Carlos Sainz x driver!fem!oc

wc: 8216

SLOW BURN MULTIPART STORY, begins in 2019 but we will be jumping around slightly just bc I will not survive writing out every season until the current one XD Later on in the story there will be references to an oc for a different story that I will also be releasing a teaser for within the next couple of weeks but as of right now she is not relevant to Aaliyah's story.

Warnings: descriptions of a panic/anxiety attack, obnoxious reporters, lots of swearing XD

A/N: welp, it's finally here! After almost a year of me talking about this I actually finished editing chapter 1! Let me know what you guys think and if you want to be included in the tag list for this!

Formula One is a dream for many drivers, yet so few of them actually get to achieve that dream. It’s such a cruel fate that these drivers face but for those that are able to turn their dreams into reality, it’s everything. One such lucky driver was 18 year old Aaliyah Thompson. She had the fortunate opportunity to be a full time driver for Toro Rosso in 2017, straight out of winning the Formula Renault 2.0 Litre championship in 2016. She quickly showed her merit and earned eight points at her first Grand Prix (in a less than adequate car), proving those that doubted her wrong. Although, some say that Aaliyah making it into Formula One was just as cruel a fate as never achieving that dream. Being the first female driver to actually start a grand prix since Lella Lombardi in 1976 as well as the youngest driver to have ever entered a grand prix, being only 16 years old in her first season, meant people held her to a very different set of standards. Any mistake meant that her seat would be questioned immediately and the media, who were always breathing down her neck like wolves, would get that misstep they’d been waiting for and pounce.

Aaliyah would be lying if she ever said she regretted her decision to sign with Toro Rosso. Sure, it was hard and the competition she faced in F1 was much more difficult than Formula Renault, but this was her dream and she’d be damned if she let anyone or anything dampen that for her.

Walking through the parking lot, Aaliyah groaned at the horde of media surrounding the entrance to the paddock. Maggie, her PR manager and best friend, lightly smacked Aaliyah’s arm to remind her cameras were everywhere, including the Netflix camera that was going to be following them for the whole weekend.

“Play nice, please,” Maggie said. “You don’t have to answer any questions yet since your first media appearance isn’t until noon, but at least look like you’re happy to see people.”

“I know, I know,” Aaliyah agreed, grabbing her backpack and slinging it over her shoulder. “I’m just not ready for everyone to ask about it.”

Maggie looked sympathetically at the 18 year old as they walked into the paddock for the first race of the 2019 season. They scanned their badges and, as expected, people immediately started asking Aaliyah about her crash and shoving microphones in her face.

“Are you nervous to drive in another grand prix after your crash in Mexico last year?” one reporter tried to ask Aaliyah.

“She’s not answering any questions right now,” Maggie explained, pushing the reporter away. “She has a scheduled media appearance at noon, you can talk to her then.”

Aaliyah could feel her throat tightening as people still tried to shout questions at her and blocked their path to the AlphaTauri hospitality. Maggie tried to explain loudly to them that they weren’t taking any questions right now, but the reporters either didn’t hear her or didn’t care. Aaliyah felt her breathing shorten as she began to hyperventilate. She looked calm to the cameras but anyone that knew her could tell she was anything but. Aaliyah tapped Maggie’s bicep three times, a signal the two had come up with that would let Maggie know they needed to get out of whatever situation asap. Maggie noticed it and immediately grabbed Aaliyah’s arm and pulled her through the swarm of reporters, no regard for who she bumped into.

Once they were out of the swarm, Maggie fell back in step beside Aaliyah so she could check on her.

“Are you okay?” she asked softly. Aaliyah shook her head in response, trying to hold back tears until they got to hospitality. “Do you want to stop walking?” Another head shake. “Alright, let’s get you to hospitality then.”

Aaliyah nodded and the two sped walked to hospitality and were greeted by cool air conditioning as they finally got away from all of the prying cameras, telling the Netflix camera to give them space. Some of the AlphaTauri workers tried to greet Aaliyah but were instantly silenced by the look Maggie gave them. She pulled Aaliyah into her driver’s room and set her down on the couch.

Aaliyah’s face was blank as she tried to focus on her breathing. Hot tears were falling down her face when she couldn’t calm down. She could faintly hear someone talking to her but couldn’t make out any of the words. Her vision was blurring and she started grabbing at her head and pulling at her hair, wanting this panic attack to stop. She felt her hands being gently pulled away from her head and soothing circles being rubbed into her palms. One of her hands was placed on the person’s, Aaliyah supposed it was Maggie’s, chest so that she could feel her breathing and replicate it. Aaliyah did her best to take slow, deep breaths and found herself calming down.

“Liyah?” she heard Maggie say. “If you can hear me, know that you’re safe. We’re in your driver room and there are no cameras and no media in here. It’s just me and you.”

Aaliyah nodded, letting Maggie know that she could hear her. Closing her eyes, Aaliyah continued to focus on her breathing and Maggie’s soothing voice. It felt like an eternity before Aaliyah opened her eyes and saw Maggie, crouched in front of her, holding her hands to ground her.

“Thank you,” Aaliyah shakily said. “I d-d-don’t kn-know what ha-hap-happened.”

There was that damn stutter again. Aaliyah didn’t miss it but knew that she got like this when she was shaken up. Just another unseen side effect of her concussion from last season.

“It’s alright, Liyah,” Maggie assured, sitting down next to the girl and rubbing circles on her back. “I should have gotten you out of there sooner, that one is on me.”

“You couldn’t have stopped it,” she said, taking time to think about what she was saying to stop her stutter. “Unfortunately the media just fucking sucks.”

Maggie laughed as Aaliyah continued to calm down from her panic attack. The two friends talked about anything not related to racing or the media until Noah, Aaliyah’s trainer, knocked on the door lightly. Maggie got up and opened the door to let the British man into the room, the Netflix cameras following him.

“How’s my favorite driver doing?” he asked as he set his bag on the massage table.

“Had a panic attack already so I’m doing peachy,” she said with a laugh and a cheeky smile.

Noah looked over to Maggie to see her response to this and Maggie just smiled and shrugged her shoulders, just glad to see Aaliyah back to herself. Maggie bid Noah and Aaliyah goodbye after reminding the two to not let Aaliyah be late to the media conference with both of them telling her they would be there on time.

“Alright,” Noah said, pulling a resistance band out of his bag for Aaliyah to use. “Why don’t you go ahead and put your hair up however you’re gonna have it for the track walk later before we get started.”

Aaliyah nodded and started putting her hair in braids while chatting with Noah.

“Shit,” Aaliyah said as she got to the end of the first braid. “I don’t have any hair ties.”

Noah was immediately handing her one he kept on his wrist at all times for her. It was something he learned very quickly after becoming her trainer, that she always lost hair ties and never found them again so he had to always have one or two on him. Aaliyah and Noah talked some more about the schedule for the day as Aaliyah finished her other braid, accepting the other hair tie from Noah.

“How are you feeling?” he asked.

“I’m ready,” Aaliyah responded. “I’m still nervous but if I don’t get back to it now and start strong, I might never be back to normal.”

“Makes sense,” Noah said, handing Aaliyah the resistance band. “I’m proud of you, though.”

Aaliyah smiled at Noah, who was more of a friend than just a trainer to her. She started doing exercises with the resistance band as she talked some more with Noah. He told her about how his fiancee, Bridget, was doing and showed her pictures of their son. Aaliyah checked her phone to see that her boyfriend had texted her. Smiling, she opened the message app and responded to his good luck message, ending it with an “I love you”.

“That Jake you’re messaging?” Noah asked the teen.

“Yeah,” she said, putting her phone away. “He couldn’t come to this weekend’s race. Said he had a shoot he and his team were doing and couldn’t change the date.”

Noah nodded, understanding that since Jake was a content creator he also had an incredibly busy schedule. That being said, he was a little annoyed because he knew Jake had promised Aaliyah he would be there for her first race of the season. Noah always looked out for Aaliyah, seeing her as his kid sister since he was almost 10 years older than her. When she had started dating Jake right after Abu Dhabi the previous year, he was hesitant to accept him but quickly realized how happy he made Aaliyah. That made him okay in Noah’s book.

“Do you want to go say hi to the other drivers?” Noah asked as he packed his bag back up.

“Yeah, that sounds fun,” Aaliyah agreed, putting her hat and sunglasses on.

The two left the driver room and walked around the paddock, a Netflix camera following them the whole time. Aaliyah saw Daniel from a mile away, walking with Kevin, and ran up to him, jumping onto his back. He stumbled a bit before holding onto her legs to keep her from falling off, both of them laughing wildly.

“Hey, kiddo!” he greeted. “How you going?”

“Doing alright,” she responded, sliding off of Daniel’s back and giving him a proper hug. “Bit of a rough morning but I’m sure it’ll get better.”

“Media pestering you?”

“Yeah.”

“Do I need to fight anyone?”

“Not yet.”

Aaliyah greeted Kevin with a hug as well, always having a soft spot for the older man. The three chatted as they walked to the media area. They were grouped together for the press conference, which Aaliyah was very excited about. Checo completed the group for the press conference and they chatted as they waited for their cue to go sit down. Checo noticed that Aaliyah’s smile didn’t quite reach her eyes but told himself he would talk to her later so that he didn’t take her focus away from the task at hand. He was glad that he was in her group for the press conference, feeling like he had a duty to help protect her from the media.

“Checo?” Aaliyah asked, speaking Spanish. “You alright?”

“Just a bit nervous for the first race of the season, mija,” he said, not wanting her to know he was worried about her. “You know how it is: the media is gonna throw a lot at us today.”

Aaliyah’s face screwed up in disgust, knowing all too well the types of questions she’d be asked today. Maggie had prepped her as best as she could but everyone knew that it would still be rough on her.

“Yeah, fuck them.”

Checo let out a loud laugh, drawing Daniel and Kevin out of their conversation to look at the two with confusion and amusement. Their PR managers quickly shushed them, knowing that if they were too loud everyone inside the press room could hear them. A few minutes later, the previous group cleared out of the press room and the group of four entered. They took their seats, Aaliyah sitting between Checo and Kevin, and put their mics on, giggling to each other about a snarky comment Aaliyah had made directly before they all walked in.

“Welcome,” a reporter said after they’d all settled down. “How are you guys?” A mix of ‘good’ and ‘excited’ were said in response. “I have a question for all of you: how are you feeling going into this race, it being the first one of the season?”

“I’ll start,” Daniel said with a laugh. “I’m excited. You know, we have a good car this year and I’m looking forward to making some pretty epic moments with the team.”

“Yeah,” Kevin agreed, going down the line. “I think it’ll be a good season. The car felt good during testing and I’m sure there will be a learning curve for it, but I’m optimistic this year.”

“I’m excited,” Aaliyah said with a grin. “It’s gonna be a great season and I’m super stoked to be teamed up with Alex this year. He seems like a great driver and I’m counting on a lot of fun battles on track.”

“It will be a very interesting season,” Checo said. “I’m looking forward to this race and I hope to earn some good points this weekend.”

The next five minutes were filled with questions for the four drivers. Aaliyah was both relieved and surprised that there had been no questions about her Mexico crash. Her relief was short-lived, however, when a particularly invasive reporter asked a question.

“I have a question for Aaliyah,” he started. “How are you feeling starting a new season so soon after your crash in Mexico? Don’t you think it’s too early for your mental state to handle the stress? Have you questioned your place and ability in this sport since your crash and the comments that everyone made about you?”

Checo was about to speak up to defend Aaliyah when she lightly touched his leg with a finger under the table, telling him it was okay.

“I don’t know, because that was definitely more than one question,” Aaliyah started, pointing out his lack of press conference etiquette. “How do you feel about trying to make someone relive trauma for your story?”

“So you’re not gonna give me an answer?” the reporter asked.

“Hell no,” Aaliyah responded with an incredulous chuckle. “If you can’t be respectful when you interview someone that recently went through something incredibly traumatic then you don’t deserve answers to your questions.”

“I’m just trying to get answers to questions we’re all wondering.”

“Stay wondering then.”

Checo gave Aaliyah a look, silently asking if she was okay. She subtly nodded back, taking a deep breath as the next reporter asked a question. Kevin kept looking over at Aaliyah throughout the rest of the media conference, making sure she was fine.

“We have time for one last question,” the facilitator told everyone.

“My question is for Aaliyah,” a female reporter spoke up. “I understand if you don’t want to talk about your crash and how you’re feeling, it was obviously traumatic for you, but I was just wondering if you would be willing to tell us a bit about how you got back on your feet afterwards. It was truly inspirational seeing you come back to the track as soon as possible last season and I would love for you to share with us what motivated you in your quick recovery.”

Aaliyah smiled softly at the woman. Finally, someone that treats me like a person. She thought.

“I appreciate you asking that in such a respectful way,” Aaliyah started, giving a pointed glare to the reporter that had been so rude to her before. “Yeah, honestly it has been a super long healing process for me. Physically, I was completely healed before Abu Dhabi. Mentally,” a pause. “Mentally I’m still healing. Like I’ve said, and been very open about, it was incredibly traumatic. Thankfully I’ve had an awesome support system with my friends, family, my team, and my boyfriend. It’s really because of them that I was able to get back in the car so soon after my crash. Plus, I’ve always said that part of the reason I’m here is to show girls that they can do whatever they want and that nothing can keep them down for long. So long answer short: I had lots of support from friends and family and wanted to make sure I’m a good role model for other girls and women.”

“Thank you,” the reporter responded. “I wish you all the best as you continue to recover.”

Aaliyah nodded in thanks as the facilitator ended the press conference. The four drivers took their mics off and walked out of the room, meeting their PR managers outside. Maggie gave Aaliyah a hug, sorry she couldn’t stop the first reporter from asking about her crash.

“Liyah,” Kevin started, getting the young driver’s attention. “You okay?”

“Honestly,” Aaliyah said, side-hugging Maggie. “Not really. But I’ll get over it. It’s not too different from any other season where reporters don’t respect me.”

“That’s not something you should get used to,” Kevin noted.

“I know,” she said, resting her head against Maggie’s shoulder. The blonde wrapped an arm around her friend for comfort. “But if I don’t get used to it, I’ll continue to be affected by it. And I’m sick of crying after every press conference and interview.”

The three drivers looked at her with a tinge of pity. Even though they knew that media duties were always rough for the 18 year old, they were unaware of the extent of the toll it took on her. Maggie glanced at her watch and pulled Aaliyah away from the uncomfortable situation by saying that she had to do her track walk soon and needed to meet up with her team. Aaliyah gave them all a hug in parting and said she’d talk to them later that evening.

“I’m gonna get that reporter fired,” Maggie said, referring to the rude reporter. Aaliyah laughed as Maggie continued her incredibly unprofessional rant. “Seriously! Who does he think he is? Talking to you like that. I’ll shave my head before I let anyone disrespect you like that.”

Aaliyah laughed loudly as the two friends walked back to the AlphaTauri hospitality. The two made it back and Alex was sitting in the lounge area, eating some of the snacks available to them. Aaliyah smiled as she parted ways with Maggie, who was likely off to plan something for Aaliyah to do, to sit down across from her rookie teammate.

“Hey, Alex!” she greeted as she sat down. “How are you?”

“Oh hey, Liyah!” he said around a mouthful of crisps. “I’m doing alright, less nervous today than I thought I would be, but I’m sure I’ll make up for it tomorrow.”

Aaliyah laughed a bit at his response. It was odd, she was the younger one on the team but was the more experienced driver. Alex looked up to her to follow her lead. Not literally of course, Aaliyah was much too short for that to be a possibility.

“It’s honestly not that bad once you’re in the car,” Aaliyah assured, sitting back on the couch and crossing her legs. “Yes, the cars are different from other Formula series’ but it’s racing just like you’ve done your whole life. You’ll do grand, I’m sure.”

“I appreciate that, thank you,” Alex said honestly. “How was your press conference, by the way?”

“Long answer or short answer?” Aaliyah asked, rolling her eyes.

“We’ve got time.”

Aaliyah laughed at Alex’s response before telling him about the press conference, going into great detail (per his request) about the rude reporter she had called out. Alex was just as appalled as Maggie and was ready to get up and punch the reporter for his treatment of Aaliyah.

“He really said that to you?” he asked incredulously.

“Yeah,” she responded. “I was kind of expecting questions about it, but definitely nothing like that. It kind of shook me up a bit.”

“Understandable.” A pause. “I’m gonna fight him.”

“I think you’ll have to get in line,” Aaliyah joked. “Checo, Dan, and Maggie have first dibs. Maggie said something about getting him fired and shaving her head before she let someone talk to me like that.” Alex laughed at this, easily seeing the fiery blonde saying that. “It was all very unprofessional but sweet nonetheless so I’m not gonna snitch on her.”

Maggie, of course, chose that moment to walk back into the lounge area. Aaliyah laughed at the timing as her PR manager raised an eyebrow at her and went to stand behind Aaliyah on the couch. She rested her hands on her shoulders, gripping them lightly, before speaking.

“What’s this I hear about you snitching on me?” she asked.

“No, I said I wasn’t snitching on you,” Aaliyah clarified with a chuckle.

Maggie released Aaliyah from her grasp before immediately jumping back to business. Alex laughed at the interaction between the two, clearly seeing how close they were. Maggie finished telling Aaliyah her schedule for the rest of the day and stayed to chat for a few minutes longer.

“How long have you guys known each other?” Alex asked.

“I think we met my second to last year of karting?” Aaliyah asked Maggie to clarify.

“Yeah,” Maggie agreed. “It was one of the races where you beat my brother. He was not happy about it but I remember thinking I wanted to be friends with you.”

“And now she won’t leave me alone,” she joked to Alex.

Maggie smacked Aaliyah on the back of the head, rolling her eyes. Aaliyah let out an undignified noise at the contact and rubbed the back of her head where it had been hit, protesting that she recently had a concussion. Alex let out a loud laugh at the two’s interaction. Maggie gave Aaliyah a light tap on top of her head and said goodbye, saying she was leaving to get lunch for her and Aaliyah.

“Were you nervous before your first race weekend in F1?” Alex quietly asked the younger girl once Maggie had left.

Aaliyah smiled at Alex softly. She knew the nerves and the media were likely getting to him much more than he had been letting on.

“I was terrified,” Aaliyah said with a chuckle. “I was paired up with a more experienced and older driver, I was driving for the junior team of a team that had recently been champions for four consecutive years, and I was gonna be surrounded by a bunch of guys I didn’t know. Obviously my experience is different from yours, but if I ended up doing well, you’ll do just fine. You’re more experienced than I was when I joined.”

“Thanks, Liyah,” he said sincerely.

“Of course, Alex,” she responded.

“Is Jake going to be here at all this weekend?” Alex asked as he shoved more crisps into his mouth.

“No,” Aaliyah said, tired smile on her face. “He said he had a shoot he was doing for a big video and they couldn’t change the shoot date so close to it.”

“Didn’t you say he promised he’d be here for your first race of the season?”

“I did say that, yes. Apparently money is more important than supporting me and attending our first race weekend as a couple.”

“That’s messed up.”

Aaliyah nodded, clearly annoyed by her boyfriend’s decisions. As Alex looked at her, his eyebrows scrunched together in annoyance. He had met Jake a few times during pre-season events and each time made him wonder what on earth Aaliyah saw in him. She was so much more mature, successful, and overall pleasant to be around than the guy she chose to date. They seemed happy, so Alex didn’t say anything. He really wanted to though. Aaliyah already felt like his sister and even though he knew she didn’t need him to protect her, he felt like he had an obligation to look out for her.

At that moment, Aaliyah’s phone rang. She looked at the caller ID and saw that Max was calling her. Sighing, she put the phone to her ear.

“What do you need?” she asked.

“How come you think I need something every time I call you? Can’t I just want to talk to my best friend?” the Dutch man asked.

“You can but you never do,” Aaliyah responded with a laugh.

“I’m coming over and we’re talking about it.”

The smile fell off of Aaliyah’s face after hearing that. She knew Max knew her better than almost everyone, besides her family and Lance, and he knew how much she was really affected by the media that day.

“Okay.”

“Okay. See you soon.”

Aaliyah sighed and ended the call. Alex looked at her, worried.

“What was that about?” he asked.

“Max being an annoyingly good best friend,” she responded.

That was an unexpected twist for Alex, but he decided to leave whatever the two friends were going to talk about between them. Aaliyah and Alex made small talk in the lounge area until Max barged into the AlphaTauri hospitality and made eye contact with Aaliyah. Alex laughed as Aaliyah hung her head and followed Max to her driver’s room as he scolded her for not telling him what happened in the press conference and how he had to find out from Daniel. He closed the door to her room and crossed his arms as he looked at her. She took her hat off and set it down as she turned to look at Max, more accurately to avoid his gaze by looking anywhere but him.

“Why didn’t you tell me?” he asked.

“I was going to tell you,” Aaliyah started. “I just hadn’t gotten around to it yet.”

“Aaliyah,” he sighed.

“I know! Okay?! I know!” she snapped. “You told me to tell you if something like this happened and you told me to not be snarky. But I couldn’t help it! He was being an ass!”

Max waited for Aaliyah to calm down from her outburst, knowing she needed it and wouldn’t do this in front of anyone else aside from Lance, Checo, and maybe Pierre. Aaliyah looked at him and Max saw how vulnerable she really felt. He said her name softly and pulled her into a tight hug. She let her tears fall, completely overwhelmed by the day already. Max held his friend until he knew she was okay and she started pulling away. He watched as she wiped her face free of tears and turned to look in the mirror in her driver room to wipe away any mascara that had smudged.

“You feel better now?” he asked.

“Yeah,” she replied, grabbing her water bottle and taking a sip. “Thanks for always being there for me.”

“I’m not going anywhere,” Max said, giving the younger girl another hug. “You’re stuck with me.”

“There’s worse people to be stuck with,” she joked. “Can you even imagine if I was stuck with Robert?”

Max laughed out loud at this. It’s not that either of them disliked Kubica, but he definitely would not be at the top of Aaliyah’s list of people she’d go to when she needed someone. The two friends waited in Aaliyah’s driver room until she was completely composed and no longer looked like she had just been crying. Aaliyah led Max to the front door of the hospitality and gave him a hug before sending him on his merry way. Turning back around, Alex was scrolling on social media on the couch and gave Aaliyah a smile as she walked back over to the sitting area. She followed his lead and pulled out her phone to scroll through various media feeds, eventually settling on watching videos on YouTube.

At some point Maggie and Alex’s PR manager brought food back for lunch and the four of them ate together in the lounge area. When they were done, they cleaned up and Aaliyah went to her driver room to grab her hat and came back out to see her team ready to go to the track for their track walk. Aaliyah put her hat on and grabbed a water bottle from Maggie’s hand. Putting on her sunglasses, Aaliyah told her team she was ready and they all bid their goodbyes to those present in the hospitality and made their way to the track.

Walking through the paddock was rough. Aaliyah was the hot topic of the season start despite the season’s three rookies, the dramatic end of her Mexico Grand Prix the prior season not losing any of its headlining ability yet, causing reporters to flock to her in the hopes they could glean a bit of that popularity for themselves. Aaliyah did her best to ignore the media as her team formed a sort of barricade around her to protect her from prying eyes and loud, invasive questions. When they finally got to the track, her team allowed Aaliyah to walk onto it first to escape the reporters. They quickly followed her lead and began their track walk.

Aaliyah couldn’t help but let her mind wander a bit on the track. She always ended up making her team do multiple laps on track so that she could get a good feel for it, something that the media had lovingly dubbed “fortune telling” (the term going hand-in-hand with the nickname “Miss Fortune” that they had also given her) since she almost always had a more accurate reading of the track than her competitors.

“What do you think, Liyah?” Jacques asked his driver, his British accent a familiar voice to her ears.

Aaliyah was snapped out of her thoughts and looked up at her race engineer with wide eyes. She smiled sheepishly and Jacques laughed, knowing she didn’t have a clue what they had been talking about.

“Sorry,” she said. “I didn’t quite catch that.”

“It’s alright,” Jacques said with a smile. “I was asking what you thought about this turn and how you think you’ll be able to go with it?”

Aaliyah stood still and examined the entrance, apex, and exit of the turn with careful eyes. It was a sight to see, the girl becoming incredibly serious very quickly, a sight that her team tried to never take for granted. They enjoyed watching her process, especially because she always gave them great insight about the practicalities of the track and how she could realistically drive it. Crouching down, Aaliyah placed a hand on the track lightly. She wasn’t a superstitious person, but she was a little stitious. She didn’t think the track could literally talk to her, but she could almost feel how the track felt on those days. It didn’t make sense to any of the other drivers or the engineers, some of them regularly teasing her for it, but ultimately they accepted that her readings were pretty accurate more often than not. Aaliyah studied the track with scrutiny, hoping to glean any information that she could from it.

“How does it feel?” Jacques asked the girl.

“Not sure yet,” Aaliyah responded. “Not bad, not good, just… nothing right now. May need to do a few more laps before I can really tell.”

Jacques nodded, accepting her answer. She would always tell him what the track felt like to her so that he could change strategies accordingly. Her strategists also made sure to take her readings into account, knowing all too well what could happen if they didn’t. On good weekends, Aaliyah described the track as warm, not like warm weather, more like the fuzzy feeling you get when surrounded by the people you love. An inviting feeling, for sure. Those were the weekends that everyone could expect her to do extraordinarily well and she normally delivered the expected or better results. Naturally, those were Aaliyah’s favorites. Some weekends, the track didn’t feel warm, but it also didn’t feel like the cold that filled her when the track felt bad. Those weekends were a toss-up about what would happen. When the track felt bad, it was a cold that washed over Aaliyah as if she was in primary school and about to give a speech. It made her nervous, but she wasn’t filled with dread. Those races, more often than not, she didn’t deliver the results that were expected of her.

The worst of the feelings, Aaliyah had only experienced a handful of times in her entire racing career, but it was an unforgettable feeling. It was the cold dread that didn’t just wash over her, it poured down on her continually the entire weekend. Imagine standing on the edge of an unstable cliff with no safety gear ensuring your safe return home and certain doom if you were to fall. That was the worst feeling Aaliyah had ever experienced. She felt it at Mexico the year prior and back in Formula Renault once or twice. Every time, she had a bad crash and didn’t finish the race.

Aaliyah was jumpscared out of her reverie by Daniel Ricciardo biking past her with a loud “Whooop!” Placing a hand on her chest to calm down, Aaliyah flipped Daniel off as he sped away. He glanced back at the girl and his grin somehow got bigger as he laughed loudly at her reaction.

“I hope you fall!” Aaliyah yelled after him, not really meaning it. “Aussies, am I right?”

Her team laughed with the British girl before getting on with the rest of the track walk. They walked around the track twice so that they could get better bearings on the track conditions. Deciding they got all the information they needed, Aaliyah’s team told her they were going to head back to the garage to come up with a plan for practice and to let them know when she got a better read on the track herself. Noah stayed behind with her to chat as the rest of their team left.

“You get a good reading yet?” Noah asked his friend.

“It’s weird,” Aaliyah started, looking at Noah. “For a second there I thought it felt pretty good but now? Now I just feel nothing. Not good or bad.”

“We’ll let the strategy guys know then,” he said with a smile. “I’m always amazed by your readings, have I ever told you that?”

“You’ve mentioned it once or twice,” she responded with a chuckle. “I could stand to hear it more often. Too many people say it’s weird.”

“Fuck them, then,” Noah grimaced. “It’s incredible because you’re almost always more accurate than the others.”

“You’re too good to me, Noah,” Aaliyah said with a smile.

“Nah,” he disagreed, pulling the girl into his side in a hug. “I’m not good enough to you. Even if you’re a dumbass sometimes.”

“There it is,” she laughed, knowing he could never be sentimental for too long.

The two laughed as they made their way off the track and into the garage to greet the engineers. Aaliyah said hello to both sides of the AlphaTauri garage before heading back to the hospitality to do some of the social media duties Maggie had told her about prior to the track walk. She waved to some fans and took pictures with some people that were in the paddock before finally reaching the refuge that was the hospitality.

Noah let her walk in first to escape the mass of people and cameras that were trying to follow her. Alex was no longer in the sitting area of the hospitality but Maggie was there to greet Aaliyah and Noah. The three went to Aaliyah’s driver room to get Aaliyah ready for the social media videos. Aaliyah sat down on the couch and took off her hat and sunglasses, setting them on a small table next to her.

“Drink water,” Maggie told Aaliyah, handing her a water bottle. “You look pale.”

“Thanks, mum,” Aaliyah said with a light smirk.

She didn’t actually argue with Maggie and drank the water given to her. Noah and Aaliyah chatted as Maggie finalized a few things on her phone and let in one of the team photographers to take some natural pictures to start off the weekend. Maggie finally finished whatever it was she had been doing and turned to Aaliyah.

“Okay, Liyah,” she started. “You have one more social media video to make showing off your helmet for the year and then you’ll be free for the rest of the day.”

“Free as in I get to leave or free as in I have to stay in case something comes up?” she asked with a cheeky smile.

“Free as in you get to leave, brat,” Maggie said, lightly smacking Aaliyah’s head with her folder. “Your helmet is in the bag on the table. Also make sure you bring a new sharpie tomorrow, you’ll have to sign some things before and after practice.”

Aaliyah nodded as she got up and grabbed her helmet for the 2019 season. It was her favorite helmet that she’d had so far, with swirling reds and yellows adorning the majority of the surface area. Her six-year-old brother, Leo, had helped her design it with input from their ten-year-old brother, Hunter. She sat back down on the couch and held the helmet in her hands to show it off to the camera that was about to be recording her. Maggie gave her a thumbs up, telling her it had started and Aaliyah began talking.

“Hello, everyone, Liyah here!” Aaliyah started with a grin. “I hope you’re all as excited as me for the start of the new season and I wanted to share with you guys my helmet for the 2019 season.” She lifted it up higher to better show the camera what it looked like. “It was actually designed by my two younger brothers and refined by my sister and myself. My youngest brother really clung to the Red Bull colors of yellow and red and did some sweeping waves for the beach town we grew up in in England and my other brother included a paw print of the family dog that he somehow coerced her to cooperate for.” She turned the helmet so the visor was facing her and pointed out the paw print with the dog’s name underneath to the camera. “This helmet doesn’t have some huge symbolism or anything, it’s mostly a testament to my family and how much they mean to me. It’s really a way for me to stay close to them while I’m on track, which is something I started last year after Mexico when I put a picture of them in my helmet.” She let the helmet go lower in frame as she finished the video off. “Anyways, thank you guys for your support and I can’t wait to see you all this season! Liyah out.”

She gave a two finger salute and Maggie ended the recording.

“Nicely done, Liyah,” she said, turning the camera off to put it away. “Alright, I want to head back to the hotel so that I can edit this and get it up right away on your channels and send it to Mike for the AlphaTauri channels. Once you’re packed up, we’ll head out, okay?”

Aaliyah nodded and got up to pack her stuff up. It was a quick process since most of it was still in her bag. Putting her helmet away and zipping up her bag, Aaliyah was ready and slung her backpack over her shoulder. Noah and Maggie both stood up and the three walked out together, saying goodbye to those that were in the common area of the hospitality. They walked out to the carpark, completely ignoring any reporters that were being obnoxious and yelling questions at Aaliyah. She did, however, stop for photos with some fans and signed some things when asked. They finally made it out to the carpark and Maggie and Aaliyah said goodbye to Noah, knowing they probably wouldn’t see him again before the next morning.

“You cool if I drive?” Aaliyah asked Maggie, knowing that sometimes Maggie couldn’t handle someone else driving her.

“I appreciate the concern,” Maggie said. “But I never mind you driving me. Noah on the other hand…”

Maggie trailed off and the two girls laughed as they put their bags in the boot of the car and got in. It was a relatively short drive back to the hotel and the music that Maggie played made it seem that much shorter. Once they got to the hotel and parked, they grabbed their bags out of the car and walked in together. Their rooms were on the same floor so they accompanied each other in the elevator and separated to go down the hallways that held their respective rooms.

“Thank god,” Aaliyah said quietly as she unlocked her hotel room and walked inside.

She immediately dumped her bag on the chair in the living room and went straight back to the bedroom so that she could get ready for either a bath or shower, she hadn’t decided which one she wanted yet. She had taken off her shoes and belt and was about to take off her shirt when there was a knock at her door. Quietly groaning, Aaliyah walked to her front door. Looking through the peephole, she saw Carlos standing at her door.

The two were pretty good friends, having been teammates during Aaliyah’s rookie season with Toro Rosso, and often checked up with each other at least once every race weekend. There were some exceptions of course, but generally they would make a point to see each other outside of the paddock every race weekend.

Aaliyah sighed a bit and opened the door to her friend.

“Do you do this often, Sainz?” she asked teasingly.

“What do you mean?” he asked, confused.

“Knock on women’s hotel doors immediately after they get back,” Aaliyah chuckled.

Carlos’ eyes widened a bit, worried he was intruding now, and he started to turn to leave while talking.

“Sorry,” he started. “I didn’t realize you had only just got back from the circuit. I can leave you for the night?”

Aaliyah laughed and grabbed his arm, stopping him from actually leaving.

“I’m kidding, Carlos,” she said in Spanish. “You are more than welcome to keep me company for a while tonight.”

Carlos smiled as Aaliyah gestured for him to go into her hotel room. He walked in and gawked at the size.

“Your room is this big?” he asked incredulously. “Mine looks like a closet compared.”

“It’s the Red Bull money,” Aaliyah laughed as the door closed behind her. “That and the brand new sponsor.”

Carlos let out a hum of agreement as Aaliyah went to her bedroom and grabbed clothes to change into, announcing to her friend that she would be out shortly. She closed the door of the bedroom and quickly changed into more comfortable clothes and tossed one of Jake’s hoodies over her shirt, the piece of clothing dwarfing her given the height difference between her and her boyfriend. Aaliyah pulled her hair out of the braids and into a ponytail before walking back out to Carlos.

“Is that Jake’s?” Carlos asked.

“Yeah,” Aaliyah said in Spanish. “He gave it to me before I left for Australia.”

“Didn’t he say at dinner last month that he would join you this weekend?” he asked, confused as to why she was alone for the race weekend.

“He did,” she responded, clearly upset by the fact that he wasn’t there as she plopped onto the couch and set her feet in his lap at the other end. “But he said that they had a video shoot that they couldn’t change the date for and apparently it’s a huge one.”

“But still,” Carlos started, his face screwing up in distaste for Jake’s actions. “That’s not right to cancel on you like that, especially since it would be your first race after announcing your relationship.” Aaliyah nodded with a tired smile but Carlos wasn’t done with his rant yet. “Not to mention all of the times that you didn’t go to parties and events because you were going to one of his video shoots. He needs to do the same for you.”

“You’re preaching to the choir right now, Carlos,” Aaliyah said with a dry laugh. “But there’s nothing I can do about it right now and I want to have that conversation when neither of us have some big event happening.”

Carlos hummed in agreement with Aaliyah’s plan and the two fell into a comfortable silence. They sat like that, Aaliyah’s feet still in Carlos’ lap and his arm resting on her calves, for a few minutes before Aaliyah started to reach for the remote to turn the tv on. As she grabbed it, Carlos began to speak again.

“If I’m being honest,” he started, making Aaliyah pause her action. “This wasn’t just a social call.” She looked at him, confused, as she set the remote back down. “I heard what happened today at your press conference. I wanted to make sure you were okay.”

Aaliyah shook her head as she let it rest against the back of the couch.

“Is everyone talking about that or something?” she asked, switching back to English and clearly annoyed by the interaction being the gossip of the day. “Who did you even hear about it from?”

“Well,” Carlos started, hesitating to say how he heard of it. With a pointed look from Aaliyah his resolve crumbled and he spoke. “I heard it from Lando who said he heard it from George who said he heard it from Alex.”

“Of course it was the rookies,” Aaliyah said.

There was more silence before Carlos broke the silence. He knew that he shouldn’t have brought it up but he also knew that he needed to talk to Aaliyah about it.

“I just wanted to make sure you were okay, Liyah,” he said. “I know how that kind of stuff affects you. We were teammates after all.”

“I know, Carlos,” Aaliyah said, smiling softly at him. “I do appreciate it, despite what it sounds like.” There was a pause as Aaliyah thought about her response. “I’m doing as well as I can,” she settled on. “It sucks for sure, but I’m alright. I held it together and got through the rest of the conference, which is what matters.”

“What matters is you and your mental health,” Carlos interjected, upset that she was so nonchalant about it. “You say you’re fine, but you don’t even know how bad it’s affecting you. You accept it as an inevitable event that you’ll be disrespected and that shouldn’t be the case.”

Carlos was getting so heated about this that he switched back to Spanish to get his point across. At his comment, Aaliyah stood up and looked down at Carlos.

“Do you really think I wouldn’t stop it if I could?!” she exclaimed. “I would love it if I didn’t have to deal with this every single day of my fucking life. Unfortunately, I don’t have that kind of power because nobody fucking respects me! Of course I shouldn’t accept it as inevitable, but until others also stand up for me it will be! It will always be something I have to deal with just because of my gender and choice of profession. I know that, I accept that. You need to get over your self righteous self and accept it too if you’re not going to try to help make a change.” Aaliyah was out of breath at the end of the rant but she wasn’t done yet. “I understand that you don’t get it, but if you really want things to change, you have to actually be a part of it instead of just telling me how things should be.”

Carlos was left in a stunned silence. He hadn’t expected Aaliyah to react in that way when he brought it up and he wholly regretted asking her about it in that moment. He was about to say something when Aaliyah cut him off.

“I think you need to leave, Carlos,” she said, not in a cold way, just a frustrated one. “It’s been a long day for both of us. We should get some rest before practice tomorrow.”

Carlos got up and left in a flurry of hushed “I’m sorry”. Aaliyah sighed as the door clicked behind him and plopped back down on the couch. It didn’t help that she had already had to deal with Max about the press conference that day as well as the slight twinge of betrayal from finding out Alex was one of the ones that spread the gossip. It wasn’t like she expected for nobody to learn about it, it was televised after all. She had just hoped that it wouldn’t be the source of paddock gossip, she’d already been the center of that too many times.

Aaliyah got up, realizing she still hadn’t showered, and walked to the bathroom to clean off from the day. The Australian sun and heat didn’t do her many favors, leaving her a sweating mess after the day at the track. She showered off, finally being able to relax from the stressful day she had. Setting an alarm, Aaliyah got into bed, hoping to get some rest before getting into the car the following morning.

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A/N: If you made it all the way down here, thank you for reading! I appreciate you! Let me know what you thought of this chapter and let me know if you would like to be put on the taglist! This is a story I have been thinking about and writing for a hot minute now so it seems kinda weird to be sharing this story with everyone else now XD Anywho, I hope you enjoyed <3 See you all later!

Cazza out (^▽^)

[silcoitus]

Free Silco Requests

Hello! I realized that I don't have any guidelines on requests on my pinned post, so I'm writing this to link to in my masterlist.

My inbox is always open for Silco fic requests! Below are what I offer, including something new!

General Silco (no reader)

Fluff

Hurt/Comfort

Angst

Can also include secondary characters upon request, though I have only written for: Jinx/Powder, Singed, Sevika, Vander, Marcus and unnamed background OCs

Silco/gn!reader

Fluff

Hurt/Comfort

Angst

Suggestive with no sex-specific body parts

Hand-written letters from Silco! More details below

Silco/f!reader

Fluff

Hurt/comfort

Angst

Suggestive

Explicit smut with female body parts mentioned

Hand-written letters from Silco! More details below

Handwritten letters: I now offer short letters from Silco ranging from 100-300 words. These letters are written by hand and then scanned. I also take close-up photos of the letters. These will not be mailed out.

Content: You can either send me exactly what you want the letter to say or you can request that I write it. In your request, please include:

How you want it addressed (name, pet name, etc)

The contents of the letter: either the letter in full that you would like hand-lettered or the nature of the letter you would like me to write/pen

If you're comfortable with me posting it to Tumblr. It will be sent as a reply to the original ask. (If you're not comfortable with it being shared publicly, please let me know and I will DM you the letter files.)

For an example of a letter, check out the sample one I wrote here.

General Request Notes

I never use y/n. I do not use physical descriptions. I will not include a "Will Not Write" list because I like to think I'm pretty open-minded. That said, I reserve the right to ignore requests that make me uncomfortable.

A Note on Timing

My Silco muse is an unpredictable beast; there is no telling when it will strike. If you send me a request, please be patient with me as it can take some time for me to get to it. But know that I will at the very least write 1k words for you. Most one-shots average 2k words. If you're very lucky and the prompt is especially tantalizing to my brain, it might turn into a multipart, like how Confessions became a 9k wc 3-parter.

Thank you!

Thanks for reading this far, thanks for supporting my silly fics, thanks for being cool. I love you.

[jappleseedoree]

- ୨ 5️⃣ ୧ -

help me out! || kim woonhak smau

genre: fluff!!

multipart smau (ignore any timestamps!)

prev ♡ next part ♡ master list

written part after last slide!! (wc: 223)

it was the end of last period when Woonhak snuck behind you, and hugged you from behind. You whipped your head around to see his face, smiling cutely. it took you a while to realize the distance between your faces. he dropped his hands from your waist to back up from you, rubbing the back of his neck, smiling sheepishly with a pink glow, growing on his cheeks. “hi Woonhak! what’s up?” you said with a smile. “oh, i just saw you when i came out of class so i just came over, i wanted to remind you about the tutoring later too! ooh, also, are you gonna just go straight to the library? or are you going back, then coming back to the library? sorry, i was rambling…” he apologized, avoiding your eyes in embarrassment. “awh, Woonhak.. it’s okay, it’s cute!” you reached for his hands, holding them in yours (even though his hands were much bigger than yours) “but uh, i’m probably gonna just stay at the library ‘cause Jaehyun’s going back at 6:30. if you want, we can just hang out and stuff!” you suggested. “oh sure! do you wanna go to the library then?” “sure!” you two walked to the library, hand in hand, even sitting at the small sofa together, Woonhak, resting his head on your shoulder.

[wttcsms]

✧ wttcsms works in progress;

a look into what's in my drafts because yes, i do write, thank you very much!!! please feel welcome to scream at me in my askbox and make me tell you more about any of the wips here

last updated apr 19 2023

it always leads to you — sae itoshi x f!reader

most likely a mini multipart series (probably around 4-6 parts, each only about ~6-7k words each). nsfw + plot (porn w plot)

current stage: prologue finished, outline needs to be done

current wc: 4k

current tags: exes to fwb/situationship to strangers with a history to awkward co-parents to lovers (relationship status: it's complicated!), pregnancy, child is part of the plot, angst, character study into sae, timeskip, homesickness, nsfw

started off as a one shot (5 times you can't escape the memory of your ex, sae, + the 1 time he comes back) but while writing it, i realized that the reunion between the two of you opened the doors to a lot more possibilities. originally, i just wanted to have it leave off at him on your doorstep whenever he decided to stay in japan bc he heard of blue lock and wanted to stick around & since he was in the area, he would find himself coming back to you. (he breaks up with you before high school graduation when he decides to go to spain). however, that scene spiraled into you & him reconciling, and eventually, there was an open sort of ending where sae decides that maybe the two of you do have a fighting chance of working out.

HOWEVER, i wanted to explore this dynamic even deeper, so the fic kind of spirals away from the canon timeline + i'm introducing a timeskip. you & sae have this weird ass long distance situationship where the distance feels like too much of an obstacle to overcome, the two of you are always on the brink of a "break up", he ends up visiting, the two of you kiss & make up and have renewed hope that this shitshow of a relationship can still work, and it's just an endless, toxic cycle, really. there's genuine love, but he's too in his head & in an entirely different country — world, really — from you, and things are hard and he's shitty at feelings. at this point, sae is 20 & making his debut into the world of professional international football.

on the same day he's about to sign with a great team, he receives a phone call from you.

you're pregnant.

he hangs up without a word. (asshole behavior but seems p in theme with what we're shown so far abt him)

the next part following that is another timeskip. this time, sae is 27 and moving back home to japan. he's in the middle of recovering from an injury, one so bad that he will never be able to play soccer again, especially at the level he was it. now he's back home, licking his wounds, and having to face everything he's spent so hard trying to run away from.

i think this fic is my first attempt at redeeming a character; i know we don't know much abt sae or his internal thoughts + intentions, but i'm having fun with fleshing him out as a flawed person who actually had good intentions. he fucked up, majorly, and reader isn't keen on taking him back. you're colder to him than you ever were, and you barely want anything to do with him. swapping the dynamic on him is also really fun to do as a writer; sae goes from the one who's out of reach and reader is the one chasing after him but now, reader is the person out of reach & sae is the one doing the chasing.

song inspiration: renegade - big red machine ft. taylor swift, cardigan - taylor swift, betty - taylor swift, exile - taylor swift, best - gracie abrams, i know it won't work - gracie abrams, the last time - taylor swift, tis the damn season - taylor swift, right where you left me - taylor swift

married (with benefits) — rin itoshi x f!reader

most likely a loooong one shot (~13k, hopefully not over 20k) nsfw / porn w plot

current stage: outline in progress

current wc: tbd

current tags: fake marriage/marriage of convenience trope, wag culture, single dad!rin, son's teacher!reader, BREEDING KINK, falling in love, mutual pining, oh no there's only one bed!!!!, jealous!rin, protective&possessive!rin, "don't speak to my wife like that" trope

original post talking abt this can be found here

basically reader is FLAT BROKE LMAO and is given the opportunity of a lifetime bc rin itoshi needs to save face and beat his awful ex-wife in their custody battle for his son.

my heart's been borrowed and yours has been blue — jean kirstein x f!reader

nsfw / porn w plot one shot (~8k)

current stage: first scene that sets up the mood for the fic is completed

current wc: 1k

current tags: fwb to lovers, toxic relationship (not w jean), college/modern au, praise kink, love confessions, jean is just so sweet & so boyfriend ok, idiots in love, mutual pining, insecure!reader, nsfw

this was a request from a follower <3 basically reader originally likes eren and they're in a toxic situationship and reader is crying over eren at a party, you run into jean, he gives you the best dicking down of your LIFE. essentially, u fall in love w ur situationship but get a happy ending this time around lol

[unorcadox]

Do you notice it looming over us now?  --  part 1 of a series [part 2]

[hopip99]

The Devil Doesn't Settle

A/N: This one took me a long time because I wanted to do the piece justice, but I kept getting writer's block throughout the writing. It didn't help that I was working odd hours and I was almost always tired. This is my first Jake "Hangman" Seresin fic as well as my first Top Gun fic. I'd love to hear your thoughts on it! It may turn into a multipart fic with how long it took me to even finish it up here.

If you'd like to request anything, I have a link to a google form where you can leave requests. That way it's easier for me to get requests split into the proper folders. That link is here.

Here is the link to my Masterlist.

Summary: Jake is a lot of things, but only a few people get to see the best parts of him. He sees his best friend crumble time and time again and he's always there to pick up the pieces. He just hopes he can make it in time to save her before it's too late.

WC: 6064

Warnings: Swearing, some fluff, violence, mentions of abuse (emotional and physical) nothing super descriptive except in some of the emotional/verbal stuff, protective Jake Seresin, mentions of depression, mentions of near-death experience, panic attacks, injuries, blood, mentions of alcohol. I think that's all, but it's very angsty and hurt/comfort driven.

Disclaimer: If any of the above topics are triggering for you, I recommend steering clear. Reading past the first paragraph is at your own risk.

Jake “Hangman” Seresin is a lot of things: cocky, arrogant, shameless, flirty, brash, and tactless. Those are the most prominent attributes of his personality, but there is more to him that his fellow pilots rarely get to see. Jake “Hangman” Seresin is also kind, compassionate, sensitive, and protective, but he seldom lets that side of himself show. His father made sure that Jake would hide away any part of himself that radiated any energy that he deemed less than masculine, and Jake became “Hangman” due to that upbringing. The kind, softer side of Jake Seresin only surfaces around a few people. Naturally, he is softer around his mother, who still calls him “Jakey” despite many half-hearted protests from her son. He never stopped her, and his disagreement with the nickname was always accompanied by a small half-smile, a hug, and an “I missed you too, mama.” His younger sister is the only other person in his family that sees his soft side. No matter how many times he declared that he loathed doing ‘girly’ things, he always helped his younger sister braid her hair or paint her nails because he was far more precise after years of flying. “You know I hate doing your hair, Emma,” he’d groan, though there was never any bite to his tone as she sat in the chair in front of him. He complained half-heartedly as he easily dove into one of the various braids he’d learned for her and smiled slightly as she’d giggle at his complaints. 

When his father and older brothers were around, he’d stop smiling and helping his mother and sister. He’d dive into a conversation about his recent missions, recent medals, or even football, which he didn’t care to watch. With them, his kind smile dissolved into the familiar cocky smirk that came with being Hangman rather than Jake. His mother and sister detested the shift in his personality that always accompanied the arrival of one or more of the other Seresin men. The way the Seresin women saw it, Jake and Hangman were two different people with two separate personalities. Hangman only surfaced around the other Seresin men and people who hadn’t known Jake before he forced the arrogant front to be his main show of personality. The only person outside the Seresin family who saw Jake’s softer, more human side was his childhood best friend Y/N Y/L/N.

From a young age, Jake became her protector. She was soft-spoken and shy when they first met at age 11. Jake noticed her long before the first time he spoke to her, but he hadn’t worked up the courage to talk to the girl until he saw one of the other boys at the park shove her off the swing when she refused to move. He was already storming over to the pair before he registered the soft whimpers and sobs she was trying to silence. He shoved the other boy off the swing hard, quickly turning to check her over. She refused to meet his gaze as he looked at the deep scrapes on her hands and knees, crimson red flushing her cheeks and ears as a young Jake Seresin hoisted her onto his back and carried her over to his mother. He set her gently on the bench beside his mother while pleading, “Mama, I need the first aid kit. She’s bleeding a lot.”

Despite her shy nature, Y/N Y/L/N and Jake Seresin were inseparable after that moment, and it drove his father insane. He couldn’t fathom why his son preferred to spend time with a shy girl over the friends he’d made playing little league all the years prior to their meeting. Jake’s mother refused to let his father come in between the pair. It was the only time Jake was allowed to be sensitive in front of his father without any chance of being lectured. Through the years, even as Jake became more and more like the persona of Hangman, he protected his best friend no matter what. When friends of the girl’s older brother teased her for having braces at 13, Jake insulted the horrible dye jobs the boys all sported. At 14, half the class laughed at her for stuttering during her speech for their English class, and he interrupted them to berate them for laughing and proceeded to laugh obnoxiously anytime any of those students stumbled during their speeches. While the teacher agreed that the other students were wrong for laughing, Jake ended up with after-school detention for a week. During that time, Y/N read quietly outside the classroom until Jake was let out, and they’d walk home together. 

When, at 15, the boy who had asked Y/N to the homecoming dance stood her up, Jake put on a tie to match her dress and bought her favorite flowers to cheer her up, as it was too late to get a corsage. He didn’t plan on bringing a date to the dance, but he refused to let some 17-year-old ruin her first-ever school dance. They danced the night away, and Jake nearly started a fight with her original date when the upperclassman called her a few unsavory names in a fit of jealousy that someone else had come to her aid. Later that night, in the parking lot, Jake broke that 17-year-old’s nose with one well-aimed punch to the bridge of his nose for trying to grab Y/N. Jake would later discover that the upperclassman wanted to bring her to an afterparty, and he felt even better about the suspension he got for attacking the other teen.

When they were 17, and he found her crying in her bedroom after she’d ducked his calls all weekend, he immediately gathered her in his arms and cradled her against his chest. Once she’d settled enough to share the reason behind her absence over the weekend, he felt his blood begin to boil. The first boy she’d trusted enough to date since the fiasco that was their first homecoming had cheated on her because she wasn’t ready to sleep with him. It took every ounce of control that Jake had not to track their classmate down and beat him to a pulp for it. Instead, he stayed glued to her side as much as he could to ensure that the guy wouldn’t try to sweet-talk his best friend into trusting him again. Jake was the one to pick up the pieces, and he had no desire to watch her crumble because of that guy again. Frankly, he didn’t want to see her crumble like that ever again for any reason. 

When the time came to submit college applications in their senior year, they applied to several of the same colleges or colleges that would be close together. Y/N supported Jake with everything she had when he told her that he’d be applying to the Naval Academy, and she took it upon herself to apply to St. Johns College and Johns Hopkins University. Jake didn’t want her to follow him across the country, though he was elated that she’d be nearby. He knew that the second he graduated from the Naval Academy, he’d be straight into flight school and shipped off to somewhere she wouldn’t be able to follow. Y/N had managed to get into Johns Hopkins University and elected to study Nursing, which Jake hadn’t expected from his shy best friend, but he supported her regardless. Y/N was there for every big event he’d had throughout his time at the Naval Academy, and he was there for every milestone she’d hit in college. Every weekend, he’d drive to Baltimore to stay with her. When the time came for his first deployment, he’d held Y/N close as she started to cry. She swore time and time again that she supported him and encouraged him to go, but she was going to miss him. Jake promised he’d write and call and text and email as often as he could, and he’d come to visit her whenever he was between deployments.

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He stuck to his word, and they kept in contact and visited as much as they could. When he’d told her he’d be headed to Top Gun, she seemed even more excited than usual that he was stateside. When he got there, he hadn’t expected to see his best friend on base at the base hospital, working as a nurse in the emergency room. Sure, he knew she’d be working in a hospital as a nurse wherever she’d settled, but he never expected her to settle in San Diego, much less Fightertown USA. He couldn’t even stop to greet her because he and the rest of the new Top Gun students were headed to their first class. By the time his class ended, Y/N had already headed home after her shift, and he was left pouting because he hadn’t gotten to greet his best friend. Instead, he followed the other pilots and WSOs to the Hard Deck. He’d barely made it through the door when he heard quick footsteps rushing towards him.

“Jake!” she had all but squealed, launching herself into his arms. A grin overtook his face as he easily used her momentum to swing her in a circle, his arms tight around her torso to keep her off the ground and tight against his chest. “It’s been too long since I saw you last,” she uttered against the skin of his neck, refusing to release him from her grasp.

“Hey there, sweetheart,” he murmured fondly, burying his face against the crook of her neck as he reluctantly set her back on her feet. The baffled expression the other aviators wore went unnoticed. Still, he was hyperaware of the gazes locked on their backs.“As much as I’d love to stay here and hug you in the middle of this bar, why don’t we go get a drink so people stop staring,” he teased gently, chuckling a bit when a deep blush bloomed on her cheeks at the realization that they had attracted so much attention. He kept one arm tightly around her as he led her over to the bar and ordered them both a beer. To the rest of the pilots and WSOs at the Hard Deck, it appeared that Jake was reuniting with a lover rather than his closest friend. He never let her get far the entire night, even when he was showing off at the dartboard or playing pool with the other Top Gun students. If he wasn’t actively participating, he was always in contact with her, whether it be their shoulders brushing as they stood close or an arm draped over her shoulder whenever someone got a little too flirty.

The protective instincts he’d had over her most of their lives bubbled to the surface when he felt her tense whenever one of the other aviators tried to flirt with her. In their time apart, she’d had several failed relationships because her partners hadn’t respected her boundaries. Knowing that his fellow aviators were having the same problem had his hackles raised, especially knowing he’d only be able to protect her when they were away from the base. Any time he got particularly hostile with one of the other pilots, she soothed him with a gentle “he’s not worth it, Jake,” and a palm pressed firmly to his chest. He’d relax just a bit with a curt nod and a reassuring squeeze on the hand that rested against his chest. When the night was over, he walked her to her car.

“Text me when you get home,” he muttered, caressing her shoulders gently before tugging her against his chest. Y/N nodded in acknowledgment, wrapping her arms tightly around Jake’s torso. She made good on her promise to text him, and they kept that pattern going for the next 13 weeks. Jake even made sure to bring her lunch any time he’d go on his lunch break, the knowledge that they both would be far too tired to meet up after work some days weighing heavily at the back of his mind. When the time came for his Top Gun graduation, he was elated to see her there. At least he was until he clocked the pain behind the forced smile she wore, and then not even coming first in his class could brighten his spirits.

“Hey, Jake,” she croaked, clearing her throat in an attempt to hide the hoarseness in her voice as she wrapped her arms around his neck to draw him into an embrace, burying her face against his chest. She’d spent the night before crying, but she was determined not to let Jake know that, even though she could sense the worry he must be feeling.

“What’s wrong?” he murmured, wrapping one arm tightly around her waist as he ran the other hand over the back of her head. He stroked her hair carefully, a habit he’d picked up after her first heartbreak because it was the only sure way he found to calm her down. She didn’t need to tell him she’d spent the night crying. He was intimately familiar with what she was like after a night of crying. Her voice was always crackly and hoarse, her eyes were always rimmed red, and her cheeks held a brighter flush than usual, and she always buried her face in his chest to try and hide the evidence. “And don’t tell me it’s nothing, Y/N. I know you well enough to know it isn’t nothing,” he whispered sternly as she pulled her face away from his chest. He moved the hand that played with her hair to gently grab her chin, turning her gaze to his face in time to notice the tears slipping over her cheeks.

“I…I just… I’m so proud of you, Jake,” she whimpered, her voice cracking midsentence. “Top of your class… Graduating from Top Gun just means I won’t see you as much… Means you’ll be on much more dangerous missions than before,” her voice was choked, clearly trying her best to keep from breaking down in front of Jake’s colleagues. “I’m scared it means that I won’t see you again.”

Jake’s heart cracks a bit at her admission, and he uses the pad of his thumb to wipe away some of her tears before pulling her head back to his chest and returning his hand to her hair. “I’m the best there is, sweetheart. I’m always going to do what it takes to come home. Who else is going to keep you safe from the creeps of the world?” he joked quietly, trying his best to soothe her concerns without getting worked up as well. After that day, Jake was deployed again, and Y/N extended her contract with the hospital on base. 

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They continued to keep in contact as much as possible, but Jake rarely had time to come and visit her anymore despite his best efforts to get leave. They would video chat when they could, but their contact was almost strictly emails and letters. Over the next couple of years, they only saw each other in person a handful of times. By the time Jake was recalled to Top Gun for a special detachment, the letters and emails from Y/N had dwindled, and he’d get maybe one or two of each a month. Just enough contact to know she was still alive and missed him, but little enough to know that something was terribly wrong. He’d never anticipated the possibility that she’d drop him from her life, and the minimal contact terrified him. When he saw her at the Hard Deck the day before training for the detachment was supposed to start, his heart dropped into the pit of his stomach.

The once vibrant woman his best friend had been seemed to have vanished in their years apart. Upon seeing him again, her grin didn’t meet her eyes, and her embrace lasted only a second. “Hey, Jake,” she whispered, her tone weak and shaky as she pulled away from him. He wondered what had happened, but his answer came in the form of a man a couple of years their senior sliding his arm around Y/N’s waist and the subtle flinch in her shoulders at the man’s touch. “This is David. David, love, this is my best friend, Jake,” she murmured, not meeting the man’s eyes. Jake recalled hearing about the man his best friend had been seeing, but she never had a bad word to say about the man. It didn’t take much searching for Jake to recognize the fear hiding under the feigned happiness in her eyes.

“Nice to finally meet you, Jake. My girl here has told me all about you,” David greeted, his cheery tone carrying an undertone of contempt. Jake’s eyes fell to where David’s hand rested on Y/N’s hip, and he noticed her wince at a particularly rough squeeze of her hip. The reaction was slight, but it was enough for red to begin clouding his vision. The man’s possessiveness unsettled Jake and his best friend’s unease grated at his heart, but he had no idea how to get her away from the monster he was sure David was.

“Nice to meet you, too. Heard a lot about you the few times Y/N managed to talk,” he replied, his Hangman persona quickly coming forward to keep himself from doing something stupid. “Mind if I steal my friend for a quick dance?” he asked, a cocky smirk overtaking his face as David forced a grin and gently pushed Y/N towards Jake.

“No problem, man. Just one, though. We’ve got dinner plans soon, and I’d like to get to know you a bit before my girl and I leave,” he sneered, doing his best to seem calm. Jake nodded and gently pulled Y/N out to the makeshift dance floor. He barely noticed the other man making his way to the bar and glared daggers into the back of Jake’s head.

“Sweetheart, are you okay?” Jake murmured, holding his best friend against his chest as gently as he could. He could feel her ribs with disturbing clarity, and if he shifted his grip ever so slightly, she’d wince in pain. If he moved closer or further from her too quickly, she’d jump and try and retreat as if anticipating a blow. Jake didn’t need an answer from her to know that she wasn’t remotely close to being okay, so the subtle shake of her head was response enough. “What can I do to help?” he asked quietly, rubbing her back soothingly as he caressed her hair in an attempt to calm her as he used to.

“I’ll be alright, Jake. He’s not a bad guy, promise,” she hissed quietly, her tone primarily influenced by the aching bruise on her lower back. “If I need help, I promise you’ll be the first person I’ll call,” she muttered before being pulled away from Jake only a few moments later. It appeared that David had changed his mind in regards to getting to know Jake more because he’d simply dragged her from the bar with an iron grip. Javy was by Jake's side the second that Y/N and David were out of sight, donning the same rigid posture. Neither said anything, but they didn’t need to. All of the pilots could identify the gravity of the situation, but they knew they couldn’t force her to seek help. 

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Throughout the training detachment, the rest of the Dagger Squad saw changes in Jake that they had no idea how to process. Sure, he was still Hangman. He was the same cocky asshole they were used to, and he still taunted them, but there was something more aggressive and nearly malicious about the way he interacted with them. More specifically, he seemed to target Rooster more frequently because he was the easiest of the bunch to get a rise out of. It came to a head when he brought up Rooster’s father in an attempt to prove that Rooster wasn’t cut out for the mission. The realization that he’d far overstepped didn’t hit him instantly, nor did it register when everyone else was pulling them apart. It wasn’t until he made it out of the room and to the parking lot. 

The weight of his actions crashed down on him once he was alone and out of sight, and he sunk to his knees beside one of the lamps in the parking lot. One hand came up to clutch at his chest as he attempted to catch his breath, his regret and worry stealing it away. His chest felt as though it was constricting, and he could barely get enough air to breathe. At that moment, he’d have preferred pulling 9G’s over the anxiety and soul-gripping fear that settled in the pit of his stomach. It wasn’t more than 20 minutes before Javy found him on the ground, barely breathing with a glazed-over look in his eyes. Javy fully intended to find Jake and reprimand him for his behavior, but those thoughts flew from his mind when he saw his best friend looking so broken somewhere that anyone could stumble upon him.

“Seresin, look at me,” Javy demanded, kneeling in front of the other pilot. It shook him to his core to see the panicked look in Jake’s eyes when they finally locked eyes. He knew Jake wouldn’t be able to speak properly until his breathing was regulated again, so he guided the other pilot through breathing exercises until Jake was no longer gasping for air. “Talk to me, Jake. What the hell happened in there? What is going on inside your head?”

“I… I shouldn’t have said what I did to Rooster,” Jake started, his voice trembling as he rubbed his chest as though he was massaging the residual tightness away. “I’m terrified of what my… what Y/N is going through. She won’t let me help, and I haven’t heard from her since the night I saw her at the Hard Deck. I took that out on Rooster when I shouldn’t have.” The admission caught Javy off guard. Vulnerability never came easy to Jake around his fellow pilots, not even with his best friend, but he had no choice but to spill what was bothering him because it would become a liability in the air. “I’m almost certain that guy she’s with is hitting her at home, Coyote. She flinched whenever I moved too fast, and she shied away from me anytime I brushed her sides and back with my hands. He dragged her out of the bar like he owns her.”

“Jake, you can’t force her to accept help,” Javy replied softly, though his nerve endings thrummed with anger. He’d met Y/N a few times, and the thought of the sweet girl who clearly owned Jake’s heart being in a dangerous situation kicked his own protective instincts into overdrive. “We’ll figure it out, but we can’t force her to accept help. Come on. You’re in no state to drive. You’re staying with me tonight,” he commanded, not giving Jake another option as he pulled the blonde to his feet. The pair walked to Javy’s car and climbed in. Jake stayed silent through the drive. The night passed in a blur for both men, and neither slept well.

Having his feelings out in the open, at least with Javy, gave Jake a sense of relief that he hadn’t had since he’d seen Y/N last. He could let go and enjoy dogfight football with his team, and he apologized to Rooster with an explanation of his actions, expressing that he knew that his fear was no excuse for what he’d done. Thankfully, the game and the apology eased the tension between Rooster and Hangman for the remainder of the training. Jake still hadn’t heard from her when they left for the mission, and he forced the thought from his head as he sat in his F-18. The uselessness he felt as Dagger Spare iced his core, especially upon hearing that both Maverick and Rooster had gone down. The icy feeling hadn’t melted away until the three of them were safe on the carrier, and the two men he’d saved had been cleared by medical.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The Dagger Squad had a full-blown celebration in swing only three days after returning from their successful mission. They were all in their civvies for once, feeling no desire to wear a uniform after such an intense mission. Unfortunately, Jake could only enjoy the celebration half-heartedly, but the grin he wore still met his eyes. With a beer in hand, he informed his teammates–his friends that he’d be stepping out to get some air. He wasn’t sure how long he’d been out there, but the party seemed to be dying down as he felt his cell phone vibrate in the pocket of his jeans. A frown tugged at the corners of his lips as he pulled his phone out to check it, first noticing that the time was nearing two in the morning.

1:53 am

Y/N (Sweetheart)

Jake, I need help.

1:55 am

Y/N (Sweetheart)

I think he’s going to kill me.

Jake’s heart plummeted into his stomach as an address came through only a few seconds later. The crash of the bottle he’d been holding shattering barely registered as he rushed inside the bar, the sound of his blood rushing past his ears overtaking his rational thought. He grabbed his jacket and tore his keys out of the pocket, drawing the attention of the other aviators. It took everything he had to rush an explanation, but Javy insisted on driving as Bradley, Bob, Reuben, and Mickey piled into Bradley’s Bronco. Natasha climbed into the back seat of Jake’s truck as the two vehicles peeled out of the parking lot at speeds that were far from legal. None of the aviators cared.

They were a 30-minute drive away, which they figured they could cut in half if they sped the entire way. Natasha had notified the police of the situation and informed them of what they were doing. Though they weren’t expressly told they could continue to speed, they didn’t care. Less than five minutes into the drive, Jake’s phone began to ring, her contact lighting up the screen.

“Sweetheart? Y/N, we’re on our way,” he rushed, frowning when she didn’t respond. Before he has a chance to speak again, the sounds of screaming filled his ears. Both of them were screaming. David was throwing around profanities and insults as Y/N pleaded with the man to calm down. Jake’s breath caught in his chest as he heard glass shatter, and his best friend let out a blood-curdling scream.

“David, please! I’m sorry!” her voice tore through the phone loud enough to catch the attention of Jake’s friends. “I swear I haven’t done anything!”

“Don’t lie to me! You’ve been sneaking around with that fucking pilot, haven’t you? That’s what the cash you hid is for!” he shouted, taking steps closer to the frightened woman. “Don’t even think of lying again, you bitch! I gave you fucking everything, and this is how you repay me?”

“I swear, I haven’t spoken to Jake since we ran into him at the Hard Deck! You saw the messages! I haven’t left other than to go to work as you told me to!” Her voice trembled as she attempted to calm his rage. From what Jake could hear, her efforts were failing royally because the sound of glass shattering and the sound of skin on skin that had to be a slap echoed in Jake’s ears. He only heard more glass shattering, more pleading, and his best friend sobbing and screaming before everything went silent. The color drained from his face as he checked his phone and saw a dreaded “Call Failed” lighting up his screen. They weren’t far now, but his body felt as though he’d been dunked in ice water.

“Drive faster, Coyote,” he ordered, his tone laced with a combination of panic and rage. Javy didn’t hesitate to speed up more, and Bradley matched his speed. It wasn’t long before they were pulling up outside the house. They’d beaten the police there, but they refused to wait. Rather, they all jumped out of the car and ran to the front door. Jake was unnerved by the silence, a feeling matched by Javy and Natasha as they’d also heard the phone call. The front door didn’t stand a chance as Jake planted his foot into the center of it as hard as he could. He kicked twice before the frame splintered, and the door flew open. To put it mildly, he was the first into the house, and it was a mess. They all took in the sight of shattered glass littering most of the floor, and they could see drops of blood leading to the kitchen.

Jake took the lead, moving quickly despite the crunch of the glass under his feet. The sight that greeted him was enough to make his stomach lurch, yet he kept himself from throwing up as he dropped to his knees beside Y/N’s unconscious body. He didn’t even feel the pain of the glass digging into his knees, the blood surrounding her body catching most of his focus as he tried to wake her up. There was no sign of David, which surely meant he’d left. Thankfully, Jake was able to find Y/N’s pulse, and he scooped her into his arms.

“Javy, I need you to drive us as fast as you can to the nearest hospital. The rest of you stay here and wait for the cops,” he commanded despite the protests of the other pilots. Javy led the way to Jake’s truck and climbed into the driver’s seat. Jake carefully settled himself into the back with Y/N in his arms. He tore his flannel off, using it to apply pressure to the wounds that were bleeding the worst on her body. “I’ve got you. Just stay with me. Stay with me,” he pleaded softly, cradling her as close as he could while maintaining the pressure on her wounds. He hadn’t paid attention to the trip to the hospital, quick as it was. His attention was drawn to the dark blue and purple bruises blossoming over her cheek and arms. If he were to look more, he’d see several other bruises, all in varying states of healing. The cuts from the glass were mostly superficial, but the deeper ones had shards embedded in them that were staunching what likely would’ve been heavy bleeding.

Jake forced himself to shake those thoughts out of his head as he rushed through the emergency room doors, biting back his arguments as nurses and emergency room doctors were lifting Y/N out of his arms and onto a stretcher. As soon as Javy had parked, he joined Jake in the waiting room, pulling him into a tight embrace. That was all it took for Jake to dissolve into tears and shallow breaths as he clung to his best friend. Javy did his best to comfort Jake, but nothing would work unless he knew she was okay and would survive. 

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Hours passed before Jake and Javy saw anyone else. The police arrived after questioning the other members of the Dagger Squad, and Jake told them, through shaky breaths, what had happened. Javy also gave his version of events, reaffirming that none of them were responsible for what had happened to Y/N. Shortly after the police left to continue investigating the house, the rest of the squad turned up, and they all took turns trying to comfort Jake. They hadn’t been given any update on Y/N’s condition, which all of them assured Jake was a good thing. No news was good news because it meant she wasn’t dead. It was another hour before a doctor came to speak with them, escorting them back to a private room to speak with them.

“Ms. Y/L/N is very lucky to be alive. The condition you brought her to us in had all of us concerned. She had multiple rib fractures. She is severely underweight and has multiple bruises and lacerations. Several of those lacerations had glass embedded in them, and the worst of them had huge glass shards that we had to remove surgically,” the doctor explained after introducing herself. “We are keeping her in the intensive care unit for now, but she has a long road ahead of her. Ordinarily, we wouldn’t let anyone stay with her. Given the circumstances and what we’ve heard from the officers, we’ve decided to allow one of you to stay with her.”

“I’ll stay,” Jake volunteered without missing a beat, carefully wiping his tears from his face. “I’ve known her since we were kids. She called me for help. I should be the one to stay,” he insists, and the doctor reluctantly leads him to her room. Jake swore that his heart stopped at that moment. Y/N was connected to so many wires that Jake couldn’t keep track of them all. She had a tube down her throat to help her breathe, and she had an IV in her arm that was giving her fluids. He sat slowly in the chair beside her bed, grabbing her hand gently before pulling it to his lips to kiss it gently. “I’m so sorry, sweetheart. I should’ve gotten there sooner,” he whispered through his tears.

The hours bled into days as Jake waited for her to wake. He barely ate and barely slept, and he only left to shower in the rooms they had at the hospital. That was only when one of the other aviators was there to keep an eye on her. As the sun rose on the third day, Jake was shaken out of his already shallow sleep by the sounds of choking and coughing. He jolted upright and immediately pressed the call button before turning to soothe Y/N.

“Shh, sweetheart. You’re alright. They’re coming to take the tube out. Please take deep breaths for me. Through your nose,” he said softly, brushing her hair back gently as she relaxed at the sound of his voice. “I’m right here. I won’t let him hurt you again,” he promised, letting out a shaky breath as her eyes met his, her breathing slowing back down. “That’s it, sweetheart. You’re doing amazing,” he soothed, only moving away from her when the nurses entered the room and removed her breathing tube. Before she even asked, Jake was by her side with some water, and he helped her drink it.

“Jake?” she asked quietly, looking over at the blonde as he grabbed her hand again. “How long has it been since you slept?” The question caught Jake so off guard that he let out a weak chuckle.

“Three days, sweetheart. I’m okay, though. How are you feeling?” he murmured, squeezing her hand gently. Despite how pale and thin she seemed, she looked a bit more like herself. Her cuts were healing nicely, and the bruises were already fading into a sickly greenish-yellow color that indicated they’d be healed soon.

“I’ve been better, Jake. Thank you for saving me that night,” she muttered before taking another sip of her water, clinging to his hand as though it was a lifeline.

“I’ll always be there to save you,” he promised, kissing her forehead. “There will never be a time that I don’t come when you call. Just please get some rest so that you can heal,” he ordered lovingly, running his fingers along her arm to reassure himself that she was alive and okay. He ignored the sparks that danced up his arm at the contact, and she fought the shiver that ran through her body. Jake made her feel safe, and she never wanted to be separated from him again. There was a lot they still needed to work out, but it could wait until she was out of the hospital. For now, it was just her and Jake, and that’s all either of them needed in that moment.

A/N: Thank you for taking the time to read this absolute monster of a fic! Please let me know if you'd like to see another chapter of this as I'm already considering making it into a series or mini-series.

Taglist: @milestellersimp @shadeds-library

[bowievanfleet]

wish you were sober [jake kiszka]

genre- angst, very light fluff

pairing- jake kiszka x gn!reader

summary- jake is your best friend, sort of. your drunken escapades are destroying you, blurring the thin line between lust and love. will you be able to put your foot down? {based on wish you were sober by conan gray}

warnings- alcohol, 420, light sexual content (nothing ever happens), kinda toxic relationship

lmk if i missed any warnings!! i know this one is a doozy

wc- 1.9k

a/n- i had a vision, so i did it >:)) this is prob gonna be a multipart thing (prob only like 2 parts) so enjoy! there might be some mistakes cuz i didnt proofread it lol

p.s.- the song i imagined for the slow dance is fade into you by mazzy star, but its not required for the story :)

PART 1

this party’s shit

wish we could dip

go anywhere but here

you grimaced as you walked into the house, the smell of pungent alcohol filling all your senses. there were lights of all colors dancing off the walls, and some 2000’s rap blaring from the speakers. you could feel the bass reverberating through your chest, and you didn’t know if you wanted to give into it or get away from it. at least the music’s decent, you thought to yourself.

jake could feel you tense beside him in reaction to the overwhelming environment, so he wrapped a hand around your waist. “you okay?” he whispered directly into your ear so you could hear him over the music, lips brushing the shell of it.

you looked up at him, “yeah, i’ll get used to it in a second.” you replied.

he gave a smile and nodded, walking towards the bar with you by his side, never taking his hand off your waist. you desperately wished he would, because just by that simple action, you knew where this night was going.

he made you and him a drink, and you began to mingle around the house together.

he had always handled his alcohol well, but that meant he drank much more than you, often getting carried away most of the time. that left you as the designated driver, so you only accepted about 2 drinks from him.

you were starting to feel the light buzz as you and jake screamed along to whatever song that was blasting through the house, and you had to admit, you were starting to have a really good time.

you and jake had somehow found your way outside, and you grimaced as he pulled out a pre-rolled joint. “don’t look at me like that,” he jested with a grin.

“you know i don’t like that shit, it smells weird.” you argued, resting your hands on the back porch railing.

he just shook his head with a grin at your antics, and proceeded to light the joint.

you two made playful banter like always as he took a couple hits, eventually putting it out to head back inside. he got himself another beer on the way back in, much to your dismay.

don’t take a hit

don’t kiss my lips

and please don’t drink more beer.

“this one’s for all the lovers!!” the DJ yelled obnoxiously, and a slower song replaced the pounding bass through the walls. you watched in slight jealousy as all the couples gravitated together and started swaying, not even really dancing, just a sea of slow movement.

you stood on the outskirts of the dance floor, slowly moving to the music until you felt two arms wrap around your waist.

you knew it was jake immediately after you felt it, almost like your mind had unwillingly memorized exactly how his touch felt.

suddenly, all of your senses were heightened. you could feel every brush of his hair against your neck and your collarbones, the light pressure of his chin hooked over your shoulder, the subtle movement of his thumbs that he rubbed in circles where his arms were placed.

“we should dance.”

it wasn’t a question, more like a statement.

if you had closed your eyes, and forgot where you were, you could almost imagine this as normal. jake as your boyfriend, the both of you in a healthy relationship. you two would kiss, and actually talk about it in the morning. you would fall asleep next to each other, and not wake up scrambling away from each other.

don’t do it! don't be stupid like you always are! your mind tried to scream, but it was useless. you always knew how it ended up with him, and no matter how much you tried to stop for the betterment of yourself, you could never do it. you could never look at his face and audibly say no, it was like a wall in your head that you couldn’t get over, an unspoken rule.

you hesitated to make yourself feel better, even though you already knew the answer as soon as you asked it.

you turned around in his arms, looping your arms around his neck lazily.

i’m already this far, you thought. what is there to lose?

“okay,” you agreed, a half smile on your face. he gave you a smile in return, the softest thing you’ve ever seen, and you thought for a second you might collapse into him until he started walking you backwards toward the dancefloor.

when you were finally there, in the center of all the people, he pulled you closer and started to sway along with the rhythm. as you stared at his face, you realized something was different about this moment. he wasn’t trying to make a move. his hands didn’t go any further than your waist, he wasn’t trying to start something.

you felt a spark of something ignite in you. hope, maybe? hope that, maybe this was the night that you got what you had wanted from him all along:

returned love.

he was looking at you with the softest look you had ever seen.

not a look of need, or lust, or desperation. if you thought about it hard enough, you could almost identify it as adoration.

he looked at you like you had put each of the stars in the sky, and hung the moon just for him. he looked at you like you were a goddess, a divine energy that wasn’t from this world, like he didn’t deserve to be in your presence.

slowly, so slow that you could see exactly what was happening as it did, he dragged his hand up from your waist, along your side and over your shoulder, ending his journey with his hand on your jaw, right where it meets your neck. you felt your faces gravitate even closer than they were, and as soon as your lips met, it was like a light switch had gone off in his brain.

he tugged your face closer, working into your mouth with a force you had never felt before, but you didn't have the power to say no to it. you had convinced yourself that it was better than nothing.

and so you reciprocated, you mind going blank for a few seconds as you ran your hands through his hair. all of a sudden the song changed back to the excruciating bass from earlier, and he finally slipped his hands down where you had expected him to. he gave a rough squeeze as he made his way down to your neck, leaving hot, open-mouthed kisses on the expanse of it. he made his way up to your ear, “need you. so bad,” he whispered, and you finally heard the desperation that always got to you. he started walking you both toward the door, but not before getting another drink.

ripped jeans and a cup that you just downed

take me where the music ain't too loud

he stumbled out of the door with you, barely able to keep his lips off your neck, and you had to manually clear your brain a few times to distract yourself from the feeling of it long enough to open the car door.

he got in the passenger side of his car, and immediately your lips were together again, molded like pieces of a puzzle. you let your resolve slip for a second as you kissed back with equally as much force, and you forgot for a second what it is you were trying to do.

you weren’t going to let him have his way tonight, you were tired of it.

you were tired of pretending you didn’t care and you were tired of the drunken escapades that were never acknowledged. you knew he didn’t feel anything on the same level as you did, and you were exhausted to the point of tears because it was destroying you;

exhausted from pretending that you weren’t hurt when he never made a move to talk about what you had done the night before, and you were tired of kissing the alcohol instead of him.

kiss me in the seat of your rover,

real sweet but i wish you were sober.

…

trip down the road, walking you home

you kiss me at your door

you had barely made it to his door before he started up again, kissing you all over, his hands roaming every square inch of your body that he could reach. you weren’t blinded by it this time, and gently took his hands away from you. he pulled back with a look of confusion.

“what's wrong, is everything okay?” he asked, and you could tell the alcohol was slowly leaving him by how concerned he looked.

“jake, i can’t do this tonight.” you pleaded, trying to keep your voice firm but convincing at the same time.

he didn’t even question it.

as much as you hated jake for what he was doing to you, you knew he would stop the second you told him to, you just couldn’t find the power in you to want to stop. he was everything you’ve ever wanted and more, and if this was what you had to do to have him for a night, you would do it a million times over again.

but tonight, it was your breaking point. right now, you wanted to scream at him till your lungs gave out for making you so addicted to him.

“okay,” he said, not even questioning your motives for the rejection. “can you at least stay over though?” he said, pulling out his puppy dog eyes.

you might’ve brought up the courage to reject his advances for the night, but a night with him, platonically, was something you could never turn down, no matter how much you wanted to.

at the end of all of this, you were still best friends, and you hoped that at the very least, that would never change.

pulling me close

beg me “stay over”

but i’m over this rollercoaster

as you got into his house, the first thing you did was head to the kitchen to grab him some water. if you were planning to talk to him tonight, you definitely wanted him to sober up first.

as he plopped down on the couch, you brought the water over to him, shooting you a grateful smile as you grabbed a blanket and curled up on the other side of the couch, turning on some netflix for background noise.

you almost let out a laugh at him shifting around, trying to hide the obvious tent in his jeans so as to not make you uncomfortable.

honestly, you always let me down

and i know we're not just hanging out

before you could start talking, he suddenly looked over at you, giving you that damned soft look again, “i really like you y/n.” he slurred, a lopsided grin on his face. “i think you're really pretty, too.” he added, and you noted how he was getting to his soft and cuddly stage of drunkenness.

and before you knew it, before you got to say what you had prepared, you were in his arms, head rested on his chest and his arm slung around your shoulders.

you started to feel the weight of your emotions settle down into your body, and you were drifting off before you could oppose.

it can wait until tomorrow, you thought to yourself, and slipped into the blackness.

[starfried]

Through and Through (Part 2)

ACK FINALLY. i wrote this, stared at it, and immediately HATED IT so i deleted it all and rewrote it!! reader and law get to hang out for a little bit. still takes place when law is 13, i don't have a set age for the reader but i'm imagining 11/12. next part will be longer and you'll get to see them actually be friends!

hopefully next part is out on thursday xP

slowburn, childhood friends to lovers, multipart, gn reader, no use of (y/n)/(name).

wc: 2.2k. part 1

After watching Wolf drive away, you anxiously pace around your empty living room. There's still time to prepare for school, but you're too unsettled from last night's events. The seriousness of the situation is beginning to bear down on you. Without the aid of that peculiar group of boys (and a polar bear), you're certain you would be dead and frozen by now.

You sigh, flopping onto your flimsy couch. You hadn't appreciated their efforts enough at the time. You wish you had anything of value to give them as thanks. You could dig through the cabinets and boxes in your home to find something, but you're sure you'd only find trinkets and old clothes. Maybe you could use your grocery budget for the week to buy them something in town. Ooh, there was a bakery that opened up recently! You haven't tried it yourself, but you remember your classmates raving about how good it was.

With a new goal in mind, you put your boots and jacket back on and head towards the door. Despite the ache in your ankle, you don't let it deter you. Remembering Law's reprimand from yesterday, you decide to also grab your scarf. However, as your hand hovers over it, you can't help but hesitate. Is this really a good idea? The boys you're seeking out were quite intense. You have no idea how they will react to you showing up with treats. Despite your doubts, you shake your head and recall your mother's advice about repaying kindness. With the oversized, frayed scarf now wrapped around your neck, you head out with a sense of nervous anticipation.

~~~~~

You sat on a bench outside the clinic, knowing that the boys worked in different places: a restaurant, a salon, a factory, and a clinic. In this city, there was only one clinic, making it the obvious choice. As you fiddled with the end of your scarf, you tried to decide what to say. He was the easiest to find, yet he was also the most intimidating.

"So you do have a scarf."

You snap your head in the direction of Law's voice and immediately find yourself at a complete loss for words. His intense gaze makes you shift uncomfortably.

“…Did you need to see the doctor?”

“No! Well, kinda?”

He raises his eyebrow in response.

“Um. I was waiting for you.”

He seems just as confused by this.

“Why?” He asks. “If you needed medical attention, you should've-”

“I brought this for you. Uh. Thanks for yesterday.” You interrupt him, awkwardly holding the basket out. “Well, it's for all of you guys, but you were the easiest to find.”

His brows furrow together as he looks between you and the basket.

“…I'm good.” He simply says, leaving you confused.

“Huh?”

“I said I'm good.” With that, he continues his trek back to the outskirts of town.

“You didn't even look inside the basket!” You protest, limping after him.

“I don't need to!” He practically hisses out, “I don't want your thanks! I didn't help you out expecting payment! What kind of doctor would I be if I just left you there to die?”

You watch him go, face twisted in frustration. Guess you'll have to find one of the other boys after all.

~~~~~

That evening, Law sat sprawled on their couch, flipping through a newspaper. The rhythmic sound of Shachi chopping vegetables was almost enough to lull him to sleep.

"Is Bepo still not here?" Penguin asks as he strides down the stairs. Law glances up at the clock. Huh. It's pretty late late already.

As if on cue, Bepo comes bursting through the door.

“Guys! I brought snacks!" He chirped. Penguin practically leapt over the bannister to get a better look at the basket of goods. Shachi wasn't far behind him, completely abandoning his cooking.

“Oh, is this from that bakery by the restaurant I work at?" Penguin asks, immediately shoving his hand into the basket.

"I dunno. I didn't buy any of it. It was actually a gift! I ran into that kid from yesterday."

Law practically slams his newspaper down at this.

"That dumbass that fell asleep in the snow?” Law asks through gritted teeth.

"Yeah! They said they had way more than they could eat, and I could take some home for us. Hey, don't take all the croissants!" He directs that last part towards Shachi, who was trying to hoard as many pastries as he could.

Law can't let this stand. He has to return the favor. Not out of compassion or appreciation, but due to his inherent pride. He saw how worn your boots were, how your jacket didn't fit quite right, how your scarf seemed as old as you were. He doesn’t have to get to know you to know you couldn't afford those treats without some kind of sacrifice.

"Weird. There's so much. More for us, though!” Law let out a sigh, leaning his head back against the couch. Of course you had to run into Bepo. He was the easiest to convince out of all of them.

“You guys have off tomorrow too, right?” He asks his friends. “Do you guys want to go fishing?”

~~~~~

The four boys admire each other's haul on the edge of the river.

“Damn. Maybe we should go pro and be fishermen.” Penguin suggests, a smug grin on his face.

“You caught way less than the rest of us!” Shachi chides.

“But I'm the one with the biggest catch!”

Law ignores their bickering, choosing instead to focus on gutting and cleaning the fish in his pile.

“You guys go ahead and head back. I need to run an errand in town.” He suddenly announces.

“I can take your fish back for you!” Bepo offers.

“It's fine. I'll be back by dinner.” The three other boys watch him leave. They're confused, but they shrug it off. Law is just like that.

Meanwhile, you sat in your home, sprawled out on the floor. In front of you were various school assignments, each in varying stages of completion. Maybe skipping school yesterday wasn't the best idea…

As you're nodding off on top of your math homework, the sound of someone harshly knocking on your door suddenly jolts you back to reality.

You wonder who that could be. When was the last time someone knocked on your door? Maybe it was one of your classmates? You trudge towards the door, cautiously cracking the door open.

Despite being the one who knocked, Law seems just as surprised to see you as you are to see him. He shrugs it off, the scowl you know so well returning to his face.

“I don't appreciate you going behind my back like that.”

“…How do you know where I live?” Is all you can think to say.

He rolls his eyes, “I asked around. Anyways, here.” He unceremoniously shoves a bucket towards you, avoiding the contact.

It's full of… fish?

“I figured you wasted what few berries you had on those pastries. Which was dumb, by the way.” He wasn't wrong; you *were* broke for the week.

“Were they good?”

You don't care about the fish. Like Law, you weren't expecting to be repaid. You just thought it was the right thing to do. You just hope they enjoyed it.

Law stares you down, the bucket still in his hand. “I didn't eat any. I hate baked sweet things.”

“Oh…” You try your best to hide your disappointment, but it's obvious by the way your face falls. There was no way you could've known he didn't like pastries. Law’s jaw tightens at your crestfallen look.

“…Everyone else liked them, though,” He admits gruffly. Despite his rough exterior, Law still has a heart. He's far from happy with the situation, but his goal today wasn't to tear you down. His words do bring you some comfort, but you're still torn. You had wanted to show your appreciate to him especially.

A moment of silence washes over the two of you. Tentatively, you open your door all the way, allowing Law a look into your home.

“Would you want to come in?"

“Wh-what?”

“I can cook for us! It’s only fair that you get to eat some too, since you went through the effort of catching these.”

Law lets out a sigh. The whole reason why he did this was because he stubbornly refused to accept your ‘thanks’.

“No, I just-”

“If you stay, I'll consider us even. Then we won't have to keep going back and forth like this anymore.”

He seriously considers your offer. His plan was to just drop the fish off and leave. Part of him feels guilty; he's nothing to you, why are you so determined to do something nice for him? Another part of him is skeptical. Are you just trying to get something out of him?

Ultimately, he chooses to swallow his feelings. He knows if he refuses, you'll be chasing after him trying to give him more gifts. He'd rather go along with your little plan than constantly have to ward off your advances.

“Okay.”

You beam at him. You weren't expecting to actually say yes! You step to the side, letting him enter. He hesitates, glancing inside your home. It didn't look or sound like anyone else was there.

“You can leave your shoes on, it's pretty drafty in here.”

He reluctantly follows you inside, carefully taking in his surroundings.

You shoot him an apologetic look. “Sorry about the dust, there's a lot of empty space in here. Oh, and the papers. I was doing my homework when you knocked.”

“On the ground?”

“Yup!” You take the bucket from him, and practically skip into the kitchen. It's been so long since you've had someone over!

Law awkwardly situates himself at the dining table as you rummage around the kitchen.

“Besides the fish, I only have rice. Is that okay?”

“That's… fine.” Seems his hunch was right; if it weren't for the fish he brought, you wouldn't have anything else to eat. “Do your parents not buy food?”

“Um… my parents aren't around anymore.”

“Oh.” He didn't know what else to say to that. He knows more than anyone how shitty that feels. Still, he didn't feel it was his place to offer sympathies to you. Instead, the two of you sit in silence as you continue cooking in the kitchen.

Finally, you bring two bowls into the dining room. It's a simple meal, just rice and seasoned fish, but it smells good enough. While Law pokes at his portion, you waste no time digging in.

“I never see you at school.” You say suddenly, mouth still full of rice. He decides not to comment on your lack of manners.

“I don't go to school.”

“Really?! I couldn't imagine not going to school.” At one point in his life, neither could he. When he doesn't say anything, you move on to your next topic.

“How old are you?”

“Thirteen.”

“Really?”

“Why the hell would I lie about that?”

You shrug, earning an eye roll from him.

“What about your friends?”

“Is this an interrogation?”

You grin. You push aside your empty bowl and lean onto the table, propping your head up with your hand.

“I'm just curious. I thought you guys were these weird feral kids that lived in the woods, but you guys are actually pretty nice!”

“I'm not nice.”

You raise your eyebrow, but choose not to argue. “Bepo's really nice.”

“I can't believe you tracked him down after I walked away from you.” He would never admit it, but he was a little impressed with your determination.

You chuckle. Of course you weren't going to take no for an answer!

Somehow, you both manage to maintain a steady conversation. You talk about his work, your school, and what you each do for fun. He even tells you a little about his friends!

Eventually, Law is the one to glance up at the clock in the doorway. He has to do a double take when he sees the time.

“Is your clock right?”

“It should be?”

“Shit! I have to go. I should've been back over an hour ago.” He quickly stands up, heading towards the door. You stumble out your chair to follow him.

“Wait! At least let me say thank you for the fish!”

He hesitates at the door. “Y-yeah. Make sure you don't let it go to waste. Oh, and, uh. The food you made wasn't too bad.” That was the closest to a compliment you would be getting from him.

“Maybe I'll see you around?”

“...Maybe.” And with that, he was out the door. You peer out the window and watch him hastily wipe snow off his bike before pedaling off.

Shutting the door, you step over your long-forgotten homework and flop back onto the couch. Today was a good day, you think. Law wasn't nearly as scary as he looked and acted.

You hope you get to see him again soon

[strangeinternetwasteland]

Imprint- Werewolf Bakugo x Fem! Reader Pt 1

A/N: I wrote this for @chaoticyuna and her summerween event which can be found here …this probably will be a multipart series…

WC: 1.7k

Warnings: None really this part is pretty SFW

There were always stories about your college UA. The ghosts that moaned and haunted the hallways, the skeletons they found buried deep beneath the school, the vampires that roamed openly on campus at night. None were ever as exaggerated as the tale of the werewolf that runs through the forest at night.

Of course, you didn’t believe any of this. The closest thing to ghosts or vampires were the pale-faced, sleep-deprived students you attended the school with. The fact that wolves even lived in the forest around the school seemed absurd. So when you started your first year at UA, the seniors would try to scare the freshmen.

You never gave in nor did you believe the stories. So when you decided to join a sorority, of course your initiation was to spend a night in the forest. Honestly, it was pathetic that so many gave into the stories like this. You refused to do such an act and were not accepted into the Sorority.

You tried again with another sorority that seemed to align with your ideals concerning the “supernatural” existence of beings. Your initiation was similar to the other sorority, only you had to go to the forest on a full moon and spend the whole night there. To you it wasn’t anything, you’d been camping many times with your family since you were little. One night wouldn’t hurt.

So you packed your sleeping bag, a few snacks, water, and some extra clothes. The warmth of the fall day gave false hope. You had checked the weather and made sure that it wasn’t going to be raining that night or extraordinarily cold. Everything seemed to have been perfect.

After dinner, you took your stuff and ventured off into the forest. You found a nice clearing not too long after the sun had just set, just before it became too dark to see. You set up camp, built a fire, and let your thoughts take you wherever they pleased while looking under the starry sky. You had drifted off to sleep fairly quickly.

A few hours later, you were awoken by the sound of a low growl of a wolf. The sound meant danger, and even in your half-sleeping state, you knew something was wrong. You quietly, and quickly tried to pack your things without attracting too much attention, you backed up slowly and felt yourself press up against something soft. You held your breath as you slowly turned to face a massive carmel colored wolf with red eyes. The last thought you had before everything turned cold and dark was, ‘I am going to die here, but why does he look sort of humane?’

You woke up just after the sun rose, in a cold sweat. Unsure if you dreamt of the giant wolf, or if it really happened. You argued with yourself while you packed up your things, but a feeling of uneasiness settled over you, almost as if you were being watched. You shook it off and chalked it up to your imagination. You walked back to the sorority house and reported your finding of nothing.

The next two weeks passed quickly, without much of anything happening. You were part of the Sorority, participating in house parties, thinking of charity events, and of course school. It was almost two months into school when you got a new student in your business marketing class, which was normally not a thing that happened often. When he entered the room all the girls in class stared at him. He oozed confidence and cockiness. Whispers were murmured amongst the girls.

When you looked up to see the commotion, you saw him walking toward you. Something about his stance and aura made you not want to make eye contact with him.

“Is this seat taken?” He asked you gruffly while pointing to the one directly next to you. You shook your head no, and kept your head down and gaze averted.

“I’m Katsuki Bakugo.” He told you while holding his hand out to you. You really wanted to look at him, but everything inside you screamed not to. You ignored him as best as you could, but your interaction  made the whole classroom whisper again.

“Alright, everyone settle down. Today’s assignment and your homework is to create a business model that you think would have sustainable growth in a five year model. You will be working with a partner. You have two weeks to complete this and present it to the class.” You swore you saw all the girls' eyes glued to Bakugo as the professor spoke.

“Bakugo, since you’re new to this class, I will let you pick your partner first.” The Professor said, but all the girls sat up a little straighter trying to get Bakugo’s attention. “I advise you though, that just because you are starting so late, I won’t make any excuse for you not to get your work done. You have quite a bit to catch up on.” He continued.

You saw Bakugo give a sly grin when the Professor said this. He nodded his head curtly.

“I choose Y/N as my partner for this assignment.” Bakugo spoke aloud, and you saw all the girls in the room deflate a little bit. You didn’t know Bakugo so how did he know you? You thought to yourself.  When you looked at him after he spoke, for the first time since he entered the room, something about him seemed so familiar. His eyes softened a bit as you looked at one another before he tore his eyes away from you. You felt his whole mood shift from confident to anger. You couldn’t explain it, but you knew something was off with Bakugo.

After everyone was partnered up, and you heard a few quips from the other females about how unfair it was that Bakugo picked you, the two of you were set off to work. As uncomfortable as Bakugo seemed with you, or the classroom, he had a lot of ideas for the assignment. Just before class the two of you exchanged numbers and planned to meet at the library tomorrow night.

Every other night you and Bakugo spent time at the library together until close. He always seemed very tense when around you, and you thought perhaps, it was just your personality that he didn’t like. He’d walk you to your dorm or sorority house when needed. The night before your presentation to the class, you were supposed to meet him, but he never showed up.

You walked around the school looking for him. You caught up with one of his friends Kirishima, who told you that Bakugo wasn’t feeling well. You thanked Kirishima, and gave him a message for Bakugo. You noticed that it was a full moon, and a cool fall night. You walked toward the forest where you felt most at peace. As you felt the cool crisp air biting at your cheeks, and feel your troubles melt away, you walked aimlessly.

Suddenly, you were in the darkest part of the forest, where very little moonlight filtered through the trees. You felt that uneasiness once again, and realized you were lost. Behind you, you heard a branch crack and break. Your heartbeat raced and you realized that you heard a low, warning growl from a wolf. This time you knew you weren’t dreaming.

In front of you was a snarling shadow with the bluest eyes you’d ever seen. You were shaking from adrenaline and while you should have ran away, you heard the gruffest, “Don’t Move” inside your head. So you obeyed. From above you lept a lighter colored wolf, who placed himself in front of you.

The two snarled at one another for a bit, but seemed to be communicating somehow. The sight was incredible and unbelievable. When the other wolf left without your legs gave out and you fainted once again.

When you woke you were surrounded with the feeling of warm fur, and the smell of carmel that pulled you back into sleep. You didn’t dream of anything more, but hours later you woke up in a fit, and inside your dorm. When you exited your dorm to rush to class, you were greeted by Bakugo.

“Hey, Y/N. Are you okay?” You eyed him suspiciously, he wasn’t as tense as he normally was.

“I am fine. I’ve just had nightmares as of late.” You snapped at him.

“Alright.” He said nonchalantly. The truth was you had a million questions for him, but you knew you couldn’t ask him.

“I meant, last night, I found you passed out in front of your dorm when I was walking back from the store.” He told you. You opened your mouth and then closed it.

“You know what? I don’t need this fake sympathy from you. Let’s do this stupid presentation and then we will never have to speak again.” You shouted at him.

He fell behind you as you walked as quickly as you could to the classroom. You both gave your presentation and ignored Bakugo as best as you could for the rest of class.

After class, you were the first one out and ran straight back to your dorm. You turned off your phone and fell asleep for the rest of the day. Your dorm mates Momo, Mina, and Ochako came and went.  Mina, whom you shared a room with, asked you if you wanted to join them. You told her no, and she knew that sometimes all you needed was space, gave you a head pat and left.

When they all left you were able to sleep again and at one point you swore you heard a knock at the door, but ignored it and everyone for the rest of the day. When you turned your phone on the next day, you saw the 5 missed phone calls from Bakugo. You were angry looking at that. The long apologetic text message didn’t seem to help either, nor did the box of Flamin’ hot Cheetos, which you assumed was Mina. However, you spotted the little note scribbled on top from Bakugo, you sat down angrily on the couch in the common area between your room and the other one, and ate the chips angrily. You were determined to ignore Bakugo for as long as possible.