#my fic: archie/jasper

[goldeneyedgirl]

TwiFicmas23 Day 9: to ground (jasper/archie)

Good evening! An early post tonight because I am fueled by chocolate frogs, the potential for some amateur surgery tonight (doctor approved, it's fine), and the promise that the holiday season is nearly upon us and I'll stop waking up in a terrified haze that I've forgotten to order something that Amazon doesn't stock locally.

It's been a weird day.

Tonight I bring you what at least three people have requested: an Attempt at Jasper/Archie. This was started for Pride and I've continued working on it. This is the first draft, so it'll undergo some polishing and edits before it hits AO3, not to mention a ream of author's notes for context.

This is my first time writing m/m, so I'm oddly fascinated with how this turned out. I think it's okay? I think my biggest issue is characterizing Archie right and making sure I capture what we know about him with what we know about Alice.

I probably need to do more world/lore building for the boys like I have with Jess and Alice, but c'est la vie. I tried and I hope for all the people that wanted this, you enjoy it!

going to ground. The motel is dim and smells damp, some rundown place halfway to Olympia that was never more than half full, used by truckers and seasonal workers on their way to Peninsula and back home again. The bedspreads were shiny, discoloured polyester; the smell of mould and stale air permeating every crevice.

Archie isn’t happy. But it’s easier to be pissed at the state of this motel to distract himself.

Jasper’s stripped to his waist in the bathroom, prolonging the inevitable. Hot water will alleviate the pain for a short time, but he’s damn well pushing it. He’s not even treating the wounds anymore; he’s just hiding.

It’s always been Jasper’s habit to go to ground when he’s injured. In Calgary, in New Hampshire, and now in Forks. He won’t - can’t - even be around the Cullens when he’s that physically vulnerable. Archie always privately wondered if Jasper brought him alone so that someone had his back, or if he knew Archie would follow him to the ends of the Earth no matter what, or maybe so that he knew that Archie was protected.

His boy was wretchedly overprotective.

Which was, frankly, the reason that they were in this mess in the first place.

Scowling, Archie nudged the bed ruffle with his toe and nodded to himself when it crinkled like plastic. This place really was a dump. Normally, Jasper would take them out in the middle of the forest somewhere, carefully chosen for their inability to be tracked. After Calgary, it had taken Archie weeks to convince Jasper to go home, that it was safe. That they were safe, Maria was gone, and the Cullens were their family - they were no danger to them, they weren’t angry or upset with them for what Maria did (though Esme had been nigh hysterical at their sudden disappearance) - and they needed to go back.

New Hampshire had been somewhat easier; it had only taken a week to get Jasper home, and that hadn’t been an emotionally loaded incident, just some territorial nomads.

And now Forks.

Jasper had driven them here, and it was an unexpected that he hadn’t simply insisted on plunging into the Olympic National Park for days on end. But maybe that was more strategy - the woods were the first place the Cullens would look. A shitty motel halfway to Olympia wouldn’t be a place anyone would come looking for them for days - especially with both Bella and Jacob wounded.

Archie scowls again, and decided he’s been patient enough. He’s not one to sulk over big things - he wants the air cleared and everything resolved. But Jasper hates arguing so much that he’ll cloister himself rather than face Archie. It doesn’t matter where, as long as he can hide - in his study, in the garage with Rose, or - apparently - in a motel bathroom only a few steps above a truck stop.

The pain would be excruciating.

He’s been in there long enough.

“Jas.” He knocks on the door, and hears nothing besides the running tap. He waits a beat before he tries the knob - surprisingly, it’s unlocked and Archie wonders if he missed Jasper unlatching it, or if he just assumed it was locked.

Jasper’s slumped against the wall, his eyes pitch-black. There’s something about them that when they’re thirsty; vampires look gaunt and slightly grey-er than usual. A little closer to dead. Probably not noticeable to humans but to him, who looks at Jasper every single day, he looks miserable.

Archie moves closer, crouching down. Jasper’s eyes are tracking him, but he says nothing.

“Show me,” Archie says gently, but Jasper’s eyes have dropped to Archie’s right arm, covered by his sweatshirt.

“Jasper, you need to let me help you.” He can smell the venom - mostly Jasper’s, but there’s a sharp, foreign note that makes Archie worry. The scent is strong enough that the wound is still open, and it’s been hours. “Please.”

“Let me see it,” Jasper says hoarsely; speaking sounds painful. He needs to hunt, on top of everything, and he can’t. Not yet. Not til they take care of this.

“You first,” Archie replies firmly, but Jasper doesn’t move, his eyes fixed on Archie’s arm.

Sighing, Archie shoves the sleeve of his sweatshirt up; there’s an old ace bandage wrapped around it whilst the skin repaired. But after he removes it, the wound is obvious - the angry purpling of the bite has faded, now that it has been cleaned of foreign venom, it’s only slightly darker and will fade completely in a few hours, especially if Archie goes hunting. It’s a shallow wound, will barely scar. Frankly, Jasper’s given him more impressive marks in bed.

But Jasper doesn’t even stop the horror from rolling off him at the sight of it.

“Your turn,” Archie says in a voice that brooks no arguments, trying to squash the irritation down. It’s been a long time since Jasper’s been this… shaken up over anything, and it’s easier to pretend that it’s him being dramatic over Archie’s bite mark right now.

Jasper nods, and gets on his knees to lean forward.

It looks exactly like Archie’s visions showed him. Worse, actually, because this is real life.

The fissure runs down his back, parallel to his spine, from where his neck and shoulder meet, to his waist. The flesh has split like a geode, and Archie can see all the petrified fat and muscle right down to the bone, with an eerie golden sheen over it all. The edges are purple-black from the foreign venom, almost blistered. In contrast, the bite mark on the back of his neck looks benign, even though it should scare him more.

The whole thing makes him feel sick and frankly, Archie doesn’t feel even a tiny bit capable of dealing with this. He would give anything to have Rose or Carlisle here to patch Jasper up, whilst he flirted and made jokes to distract him.

But Jasper wouldn’t trust them. He might respect Carlisle, and love Rose, but when it comes down to the meat of it, he doesn’t trust them like he trusts Archie.

“Don’t be mad,” Jasper says in that same hoarse, flat voice. “Please don’t be mad.”

“I’m not mad,” Archie replies, and it’s not totally a lie. He’s panicking internally, he’s still annoyed and frustrated, but he’s not angry.

Jasper lets out a sound that’s somewhere between a groan and a whine, and that pushes Archie into action - Jasper’s in pain and he’s sitting here navel-gazing.

“Come and lie on the bed, and we’ll clean this up. I promise I won’t make any moves on you,” Archie tugs him to his feet, his lame attempt at a joke falling flat. Jasper limps after him, looking miserable.

The groan Jasper lets out as he lies face-down on the bed is made uglier by the way the wound pulls and shifts as he moves. Archie’s not one with a weak stomach, but knowing that mess is attached to the person he loves most in the world… it’s hard to look at.

He almost understands why Edward’s so fixated on keeping Bella safe. If Jasper were as vulnerable as Bella…

There’s no one else to help them, so it has to be Archie.

The bag from the convenience store is on the nightstand; salt, a bottle of cheap vodka, and a tube of aloe vera. It was a goddamn crude kit; Carlisle would be horrified at the use of vodka. Actually, he’d be horrified by this whole set-up. In a perfect world, they’d be back at the Cullens and Archie would be allowed to do this properly.

But they aren’t and he can’t.

Archie had honestly never asked Jasper how they discovered flammable fluids could purge out foreign venom, and he wasn’t sure he wanted to know -the vodka would draw out any venom that stuck to the open wound, since foreign venom gained a nearly honey-like stickiness to it after a short time. The inability to purge it successfully was nearly always what caused scarring. Salt worked to purge the rest of the foreign material out of it, and aloe vera kick-started their cells healing again.

It’s not human blood; human blood would do the heavy lifting if they used that, but both of them know that it’s a slippery slope, and one that is best left alone for many reasons. The least of all is the fragile alliance they’ve formed with the Pack. Archie feels like they wouldn’t take kindly to them stealing blood from the hospital, even for injury treatment, so he didn’t even suggest it.

Carlisle would adore to discuss all of this in great detail - he’s been fixated on vampire healing principles for years. Archie should suggest it to Jasper as a holiday gift for next year. Hell, one page of notes would keep Carlisle and Eleazer occupied for days.

The worst part of treating Jasper, Archie decides as he very quickly douses Jasper’s back in salt and alcohol, is the fact that Jasper stays silent. Protesting the pain, even the smallest noise, is a sign of weakness. The only indication of the agony that he’s in is the tightening of his back and arm muscles.

So Archie talks. Everything spills out, all the inane shit that goes through his head - that he’s still disappointed that Bella didn't want to go to senior prom because the dress he had in mind would have been a showstopper, and no he wasn’t going to use it for her wedding dress because that dress has been drawn and cut for a while now.

He complains about the fight, that the wolves blocked his visions and there were one or two half-visions that looked like they spelt doom but nothing came to pass so now he’s reconsidering the accuracy. Or was the fact the wolves are unknowable affecting the outcome?

He’ll have fun debating that one with Edward at some point.

Archie isn’t sure when he runs out of easy words to say, but it does happen as he watches the foreign venom burn out of the fissure, and the room is silent. The only real communication they have is Archie’s hand rubbing Jasper’s shoulder soothingly; the only form of reassurance that he can offer right now. Too many things need to be said. Even more need to not be said.

So, they sit in silence. When the wounds look clear, Archie carefully helps Jasper lie back on the bed. It’ll take a while for them to heal, and it’s draining - Jasper told him that years ago. He’ll need to hunt immediately after this. Jasper lies back with a sigh, a breath released now that the worst of the pain has been dealt with, and closes his eyes. Archie takes up his spot in the rancid-looking armchair, hugging his knees to his chest, and waits.

Jasper breaks the silence after a couple of hours.

“Do you want to talk about it?” He sounds clearer, better, and it’s a tangible relief. Archie immediately crawls onto the bed, motioning for Jasper to lean forward so he can check his back. The fissure already looks so much better; the bite too has lightened, but both are going to leave a nasty scar.

“You still need to hunt,” Archie informs him, absently pressing a kiss to Jasper’s shoulder blade before settling Jasper back against the pillows.

He’s delicious and it doesn’t matter how many years pass, Archie still gets butterflies looking at him. Shirtless and in worn out jeans really is his very best look. If this were any other moment, just a quick getaway for some privacy…

But it isn’t.

“Talk to me,” Jasper said insistently, his hand reaching up to cup Archie’s cheek. “I know you’re still mad.”

“It was a stupid fucking risk,” Archie says precisely, but without the vehemence he had earlier. “I had everything under control. One bite is not the end of the world.”

“It is to me,” Jasper said simply. “When it’s you.”

Archie closed his eyes to drag up some patience. “Jasper. One bite verses this,” he waved his hand over him. “You were mauled. It was opportunistic and you could have gotten killed.” His voice rises and he has to stop himself, keep his temper. It’s the fear of what could have happened that makes him angry, he knows that. “I have seen you get hurt so many times over the years… so many near misses, so many times you’ve been so close to not coming back, not being there, that the fact you take those risks…”

He closes his eyes for a moment to compose himself, and instinctively lies next to Jasper, curled to rest his head on Jasper’s shoulder. It brings back memories, the scent of Jasper’s skin (the same leather-sun-wood he’s known for decades, but tinged with the venom and alcohol that leaves him uneasy) not quite soothing Archie’s anxiety. He remembers the visions where Jasper was too far gone to fight but he still went into battle. How many times did he nearly lose his head, did he nearly get overrun by enemy soldiers desperate to prove themselves by bringing down the Major of Monterrey?

How many times did Archie watch everything he ever wanted fade away for a second, because Jasper took a stupid fucking risk? And he was certain those days were over so many times - when they met; Ohio in ’49; Calgary is ’76; New Hampshire in ’81, and now Forks. It just never stops; it’s always going to linger, that idea that Jasper is never going to be safe, never going to be protected.

“If you’d been able to see it, would you have stopped me?” Jasper asks softly, one arm wrapping around Archie.

“Duh.” He’s tracing the scars on Jasper’s chest now, scars he knows so well he could draw them with his eyes closed - an absent gesture that calms him. “You never would have noticed.”

“Exactly.” Jasper waits for Archie to acknowledge his point, but he doesn’t look up. “I saw what was happening and I stopped it. The same way you would have for me.”

“But you were…” Archie scrunches his eyes up and turns away. “I would have been okay. One bite is nothing compared to all of this!”

Maybe this will turn into a proper argument. They haven’t had one since Calgary. Maybe they’re due for one.

“Come back,” Jasper says, and he sounds so tired that Archie rolls back over reflexively, but sprawled half-across Jasper’s chest this time, staring up into Jasper’s black eyes.

“I’ve seen arm bites go terribly, terribly wrong,” Jasper said in that low voice that he used just for Archie’s ears; intimate and almost dark. “You’ve seen Peter’s scars; that’s one of the better outcomes from a bad bite. And there is no part of me I wouldn’t sacrifice to make sure you aren’t the one with a mutilated arm - if we managed to save your arm at all. That newborn wasn’t going to just bite you; he was prepared to take his pound of flesh, and I…

“The injuries I’ve seen on the battlefield… Arch, I know what our venom can do to vampire skin. I’ve seen it go half necrotic, I’ve seen it eat through flesh until you just have to amputate at the shoulder. Neither Maria or I ever figured out why that happened to some bites. Only that it did and there was nothing we could do. It might just be a bite, but I couldn’t risk it. I wouldn’t risk anything about you, ever.”

Archie leads out a huff of breath and Jasper chuckles, brushing his hair from his face.

“I’m not gonna lie to you, it got away from me for a moment,” Jasper continued, his hand cupping Archie’s face again. “But I knew you were there and you had my back and that everything was going to be okay as long as you were.”

“You know that it’s the same for me, right? That it’s only going to be okay for me if you are?” Archie’s contemplating kissing him right now, but not if that’s going to interrupt this talk so that they have to finish it later. “I need you to… I need you to be selfish and be safe. Every time I think it’s gonna be okay and we don’t have to worry about dying any more, something changes and I’m tired, Jas. I’m so, so tired.”

Jasper ghosts a kiss over Archie’s cheek, and it’s not enough. “I’m never going to apologise for protecting you, and I’m never going to stop making sure you’re okay,” Jasper murmured, frowning as he shifted on the bed to redistribute their weight. “But I swear I will always come back to you, okay? When it’s our time, we’ll go together.”

Archie nods, and that’s when Jasper surprises him by pulling him flush and kissing him hard. It’s the kind of kiss that is always a precursor for more, especially if Jasper’s hand on his belt is any indication of how the rest of the night is going to go.

And he’s okay with that, as long as Jasper doesn’t mess up his back any worse.

Tomorrow, he’s going to have to check in with their family, reassure them that everything is okay, and drag Jasper home and pretend they just ran off to fuck in the woods and everything is fine. There were no grievous bodily wounds tended to in a rank little highway motel, there were no meltdowns.

But right now, he’s going to take this kiss, and the next one, and just be here and now, with the battle over and won and everyone in one piece. He’s going to get his boy naked and have one of those nights they don’t get to have very often in a family of seven where they don’t have to be quiet or subtle or keep one ear out for potential interruptions.

And he’s going to turn those words over in his mind - “When it’s our time, we’ll go together” - warm and safe, until he can trust and believe that they aren’t just a promise, but their future.

[mikaharuka]

My awesome friends! (Annie strikes again)

Well... today's been a super awesome and lovely day! So many people have reached out to me to wish me well and I'm so glad I met y'all!

What amazed me the most, was all the lovely gifts I got! You see, Momo (@axolotlsupremacyowo) made me some lovely fanart and Sara (@sliebman10), Annie (@udaberriwrites), and Salty (@tsunderewatermelon) wrote amazing fics! And all of them took a piece from my style and it's super flattering!

Sara and Salty actually wrote into my Winter Light Verse! In fact, both of them wrote MM Bellisle smut involving hands (of course lol).

Annie went into this cool canon verse thing involving Bella/Edythe and Archie/Jasper, following Archie's future visions and relationship.

Sara's fic is Wandering Hands, Salty's fic is A Flower in Hands, and Annie's fic is Dawn is a Heartbeat!

And Momo's lovely fanart of my cast from the Winter Light Verse!

...and yes, as mentioned in the title, Annie was scheming behind every single one of those fics for sure, and I'm not convinced that she knew nothing about Momo's art as well XD

Also, I ended up creating a whole Winter Light Verse collection, since I'm apparently not the only writer in that world anymore! Sara's and Salty's fics are there and I'm pretty sure Annie's scheming to join them at some point, and maybe Momo will join in too!

...so yeah. That was an interesting birthday! Thanks everybody ^_^

[Tagging because you might be interested?: @mrsmungus @lena-hills @danceswithdarkspawn @kayedium-writes @0nelittlebirdtoldme @aislinnstanaka @writingpotato07 @hylianjo @bleepbloopbotz @magma-saarebas19]

[fandom-oneshots-etc]

Requests are OPEN🎉

Dear All,

Requests are now OPEN! Please feel free to send in your requests. I have listed the characters that I write for below the ‘keep reading’ line. A few things to remember:

I do NOT write ships like Buddie etc. I only write Reader-Inserts.

I only write for characters mentioned in the list as well as any that have been added under the Additional Characters sections on my Masterlist.

I have not yet written SMUT fics, but I am not opposed to doing so.

I do not currently have an uploading schedule, but I will try to get any requests done ASAP.

That’s all there is to say, so feel free to request!

Thanks,

Emily xoxo

Complete Character Masterlist

9-1-1

Eddie Diaz

Evan Buckley

9-1-1 LONE STAR

Carlos Reyes

Judd Ryder

TK Strand

AVENGERS

Bucky Barnes

Loki Laufeyson

Peter Parker

Steve Rogers

Thor Odinson

Tony Stark

BRASSIC

Vinnie O'Neil

CASTLE

Javier Esposito

Kevin Ryan

Richard Castle

CHICAGO FIRE

Kelly Severide

Matt Casey

CHICAGO PD

Antonio Dawson

Jay Halstead

CHRONICLES OF NARNIA

Edmund Pevensie

Peter Pevensie

Prince Caspian

CRIMINAL MINDS

Aaron Hotchner

Derek Morgan

Spencer Reid

FATE THE WINX SAGA

Riven

Sky

FRIENDS

Joey Tribbiani

HARRY POTTER

Draco Malfoy

Fred Weasley

George Weasley

Harry Potter

Ron Weasley

James Potter

Remus Lupin

Sirius Black

HIGH SCHOOL MUSICAL

Troy Bolton

LETHAL WEAPON

Martin Riggs

OUTERBANKS

JJ Maybank

John B. Routledge

Rafe Cameron

Topper Thornton

RIVERDALE

Archie Andrews

FP Jones

Jughead Jones

Reggie Mantle

Sweet Pea

RIZZOLI & ISLES

Frankie Rizzoli

SHAMELESS

Carl Gallagher

Kevin Ball

Lip Gallagher

SHERLOCK

Mycroft Holmes

Sherlock Holmes

SONS OF ANARCHY

Chibs Telford

Happy Lowman

Jax Teller

Juice Ortiz

Opie Winston

Tig Trager

SUPERNATURAL

Castiel

Crowley

Dean Winchester

Sam Winchester

TEEN WOLF

Derek Hale

Stiles Stilinski

THE ORIGINALS

Elijah Mikaelson

Klaus Mikaelson

Kol Mikaelson

THE VAMPIRE DIARIES

Damon Salvatore

Jeremy Gilbert

Matt Donovan

Stefan Salvatore

Tyler Lockwood

TWILIGHT

Carlisle Cullen

Edward Cullen

Emmett Cullen

Jacob Black

Jasper Hale

Paul Lahote

Seth Clearwater

YOUTUBERS

Colby Brock

[citrusella-flugpucker]

Posting snippets from that WIP challenge post one at a time, part 25

((This WIP challenge post!

Today’s fic from the random draw is #4: Untitled document - A treatment of a potential second chapter of It’s Okay to Need Help (immediately following this doc is a different treatment of the same chapter with the same document name so it’s not getting an individual bullet, and neither is the other untitled document that does this later. or the fourth one. why are there so many)

Two or three of these are the same snippets in different orders anyway but one is more recent than the others. They’re all, like yesterday, treatments for potential It’s Okay to Need Help, except because these were intended to be the second chapter (yes. all of them.) they’re much more prime for cannibalization.

Rather than sort through cool things to pull from these docs (especially since I could only find two or three of them and one is the salvageable copy), I’m picking what I think might be one or two of the more fun snippets (I pulled them both from the same doc but one of them is in two different docs). They’re both Steven-in-therapy vibes.

No snippets are from the salvageable copy because it’s a boring framing snippet itself and little else. But it’s well-written so I haven’t cast it aside just yet.

Snippet one, in which Steven shows up to an appointment full-on Chad Steveny:

"Well, I can't say I've ever seen you like this. Maybe we should address it."

Her "maybe" is not a suggestion.

Her expression does not soften at the pink, buff boy's (faux?) confident grin.

He's not telling her that he's been this way for four days. Straight.

He's not addressing a thing.

He's fine.

Sure, his train of thought is salad and his coping methods are pudding and really honestly maybe he probably shouldn't have skipped lunch—

It's all fine. Everything's chill.

"Steven." She considers her words carefully. "I'm all for healthy growth, but you didn't look this way last week. Most… drugs don't work that fast, so I'm assuming this is a gem thing. ...Does this new look… hurt you?"

Does that new form… hurt you?

His breath catches. His smile falters. He shrinks, the pink and toned musculature disappearing in an instant.

I still really love the salad and pudding line, the vibe is so good and it is the very last darling I will ever consider killing. XP The Reformed reference is nice too

Snippet two, in which Steven is talking to his therapist about a different person he’s talked to recently (a bit longer than I might have otherwise wanted because I had a hard time figuring out where I wanted to cut it off):

"Mmhmm… and at the risk of sounding like a fictional TV show psychologist… how did that make you feel? To be called interesting. Your face is telling me you don't seem to have been thrilled with that."

Steven touches his face as if he's only realized in this moment that it's capable of communicating something so complex. "I… I wanted to be okay with it, but it made me kind of com--un… comfortable? I know she was just trying to make me feel better and she was excited to find something that would help me out when I get all… but it felt like an insult."

"Did you tell her that?"

He buries his face in a hand. "Oh, geez. I was supposed to, wasn't I?"

"Not 'supposed to'. You eat Craisin Bran instead of Crying Breakfast Cereal because you're supposed to. You buy car insurance because you're supposed to. You wear clothes outside of a nudist colony because you're supposed to. You do the stuff we talk about in here because we want to work on you finding healthier ways to deal with things, or to feel better. Do you think telling her would have helped you achieve that?

"...Maybe." He sighs. Time to come clean. "But in my defense it was a really off day."

"How off are we talking, if I may ask?"

"Somewhere between stepping out of the diamond essence and Jasper appointment."

She whistles a low note. Mentally. It'd be unprofessional to do that out loud, she thinks to herself, sparing a glance at her office toy shelf and her framed Archie Comics posters.

"...And how did that make you—"

"--Bad, I felt bad, thanks for asking."

"Thanks for sharing."

I really do think the chapter concept I have in my head that these two snippets tried to be part of could work... if only I could build them into the puzzle they need to fit into to make this work! DX

Reminder that this therapist is me borrowing Dr. Brooks from The Connie Maheswaran Fanclub (Or: How Connie Became the Most Popular Topic in School After She Pulled a Sword Out of Lion in Front of Literally Everyone) by @coreyww. Credit where credit is due!

And then there was one...

One is the loneliest number that you’ll ever do...

(The complete randomly generated order is this:  9, 2, 6, 10, 18, 19, 22, 20, 15, 8, 14, 26, 11, 17, 16, 23, 21, 1, 3, 12, 24, 5, 13, 25, 4, 7 FWIW XP)

))

[therealvinelle]

What are your thoughts on the Life and Death counterparts of the Cullens?

Oh boy, can of worms.

In short, my canon-friendly blog draws a hard line of NOPE when it comes to Life and Death. The Cullens are very reliant on their genders, swap it up and there wouldn’t be a coven in the first place. Not as we know it, anyhow. To swap things up without anything changing is to erase the experiences of men and women through history.

Disclaimer - I haven’t actually read the book, but I’ve gathered enough from the Twilight wiki. And since you’re not asking me about the plot, I think we’re good.

Alphabetically:

Archie. Both men and women were admitted to mental asylums at the turn of the century, but it was largely women. Mary Alice Brandon was forcibly institutionalized by her abusive father, which in turn was allowed to happen because no one believed her stories and thought she was mad. The story screams “Hysterical woman”. Could the same thing have happened if she were a boy? Sure. But I find it reductive.

Carine. Hoo boy, this one had me so exasperated I have a fic on it. That one gets slightly AU as her father survives the vampire, whereas in canon he was killed, but I say it goes. Anyway, Carine. You can’t take a 17th century man, make him a woman, and expect the same character to come out the other end. You just can’t. Carine and Carlisle are not going to be the same person. I think if Carine was anything like her male counterpart, she would stay in Volterra far longer than he did, if she ever left, as Volterra would be the one place in the world she could pursue knowledge, where she could educate herself and become an academic, the same as any man. It’d be her equality oasis, and she’d be leaving behind more than friendships if she left. If she went into the human world, or even tried to become a doctor, she’d have to crossdress. And I imagine she’d still be crossdressing in 2005, because misogyny and sexism isn’t going away anytime soon and it’s just what she’s used to by now. Carine puts on trousers and a fake beard before she leaves the house, it’s just how she lives her life.

Earnest. This guy is just... lackluster. Esme was turned because her husband was shitty and her son died, so she jumped off a cliff. Alright, let’s give Earnest a shitty wife and a dead kid, now he’ll jump off a cliff too. It’s just so uninspired, and I question the fact that Esme was abused, while Earnest’s wife was an alcoholic. Why can’t the woman be abusive?

Edythe. Edward’s character is strongly informed by his gender, yet I can’t imagine girl Edward being any less creepy. In case any of my readers have read @theoriginalcarnivorousmuffin‘s fic Lily and the Art of Being Sisyphus, I picture Edythe as the character Tequila. Which is to say girl!Edward gives strong vibes of an intense and creepy (it’s Edward) lesbian. Given Edward’s backstory, Edythe would still be turned, though. So, that still happens.

Eleanor. Mauled by a bear. Alright. I have no thoughts on that. I lied, I do. Eleanor’s uninspiredness is one of the reasons why this book is redundant. There’s nothing to do with this character, and so nothing is done. Nothing changes. Which, if we’re changing everyone’s gender, then the meaningful way to do that is to look at how that would change things. How has male and female socialization affected Edward and Bella? Who would Jessamine, Carine, Royal be? These questions are unfortunately rhetorical because Life and Death sure isn’t answering them.

Jessamine. It’s nice that Jasper isn’t a confederate in this AU, but I just find the story of Jessamine contrived. Besides, Jasper wasn’t supposed to be in the army, he lied about his age. If gender changes nothing, wouldn’t Jessamine crossdress her way into the army? Not that I’d want her to, glad she didn’t, but... Like the other Cullens, Jessamine’s backstory becomes a thought exercise of “How can I make the Cullens still happen, and as close to their original backstories as possible?”, one in which the answer is apparently to treat their backstories like check points. Jessamine gets turned by Maria, check, becomes warrior, check. It just feels so lazy to me.

Royal. Easily the worst. Well, Carine is the worst in terms of making no sense, but Royal... don’t genderbend Rosalie, people. And if you insist then don’t take out the rape. It’s just insensitive and uncalled for all around.

Then we have the fact that Aro and Caius were killed off-screen in a ridiculous manner. Let’s say that they were caught killing Didyme. So what? There’s no vampire cops. They were the leaders of their coven. If they’re caught killing Didyme it would mean Aro is sad because Marcus will leave, and he just killed his sister for nothing. What won’t happen is that they’re executed.

Mele’s power is another thing I take issue with. If a power like hers existed in canon... well, Caius would have a gift, for starters. More, the Volturi guard would be a repository of loyalists who were bequeathed gifts as rewards. The vampire world would be combed for new gifts, as it would only be prudent for Aro to have as many as possible and his potential enemies none. It’d be a different world, period.

The Volturi debacee seems to me like a misguided shot at girlpower on Meyer’s end, that this time around Sulpicia and Athenodora come out on top while Aro and Caius get their just desserts. Like everything else in Life and Death, it fell flat.

EDIT: Apparently I mixed up my Royces and my Royals. Yikes. Praise be to @toquesreveladores for the catch

[victoriocity-appreciation]

Victoriocity Apreciation Week 2021: Index of posts

DAY 1: Favourite Episode

Art:

S1E2 The Lodging House - @coelart

Victoriocity Season 2 Episode 6: The London Acropolis - @leliesblou

The finale of S2 - @friendlyvillagewisdom

The Fortress of Westminster - @ciotkahermenegilda

Fics:

Solito negotium - @littlebookreader

Catch Me I’m Falling - @shutupeiffel

The Grand Salcombe  - @scraprat

Other:

Favourite jokes from Episodes 1 and 2 (audio compilation) - @the-empty-man

Season 2, episode 6, The London Acropolis (appreciation post) - @more-better-words

Day 2: Favourite Main Character

Art:

Her Majesty Queen Victoria, after eleven assassination attempts and subsequent repairs (crochet) - scraprat

Fave character - Inspector Archibald Fleet (aka Archie or 'our Lord and Saviour') - friendlyvillagewisdom

Even Greater London’s favorite crime-fighting investigative journalist and small bird enthusiast, the one and only Clara Entwhistle! - @weaverofink

Fleet - ciotkahermenegilda

Archibald Fleet - coelart

Fics:

Ego ne hic quidem - littlebookreader

rota et charta - littlebookreader

The Language of Flowers - leliesblou

Other:

a bunch of random Sandringham thoughts (meta) - @calllay

Miss Clara Entwhistle (appreciation post) - more-better-words

Day 3: Favourite Relationship

Art:

'Fleet & Entwhistle, Private Investigations' - the-empty-man

Fleetwhistle!! - weaverofink

Clara’s and Fleet developing bond is pushed forward by their mutual trust - ciotkahermenegilda

Fics:

Fleetwhistle  - scraprat

a tiny ficlet featuring Sandringham and Balmoral kissing - calllay

He Is My Rock - shutupeiffel

Agents of Chaos (and love, sometimes) - friendlyvillagewisdom

Lunae lumen ipsum - littlebookreader

Of Moustache and Men -  @specialagentartemis

Other:

Some of my favourite Fleetwhistle moments from season 1 (audio compilation) - leliesblou

It was the relationship between Archibald Fleet and Clara Entwhistle that hooked me on Victoriocity in the first place (appreciation post) - more-better-words

Favourite relationships (appreciation post) - @crappy-bard ​

Day 4: Favourite Bell Sibling

Art:

Julius Bell - ciotkahermenegilda

Septimus Bell - coelart

Fics:

Aurelia - scraprat

To Get Ahead... - shutupeiffel

Character study of our dear Doctor because I love him unreasonably - @thedupshadove ​

A Very Morgue-y Christmas - leliesblou

iustus alius dies ad domum - littlebookreader

Other:

What time is it? (incorrect quotes) - littlebookreader

Victoriocity as vines the Bell family edition!!!!! (vine compilation) - @theradiowitch​

Day 5: Favourite Place/Setting

Art:

The infamous Tower of Even Greater London - weaverofink

Stephenson’s College! - ciotkahermenegilda

Fics:

The Grand Salcombe - scraprat

A Cup of Roasted Coffee - shutupeiffel

hermaphroditorum turpis diem - littlebookreader

Other:

An annotated map of locations mentioned in Victoriocity (map) - the-empty-man

Day 6: Favourite Lore/Detail

Art:

The Law of Large Numbers of Greetings Cards - leliesblou

The Three Volume Club (embroidery) - shutupeiffel

correspondence chess -  ciotkahermenegilda

Fics:

semper et in saecula - littlebookreader

The Some Twenty-Five Thousand Wolves (inhabiting the Midlands' Forest) - scraprat

Other:

Brunel Day is celebrated on Joseph Balzalgette's birthday (appreciation post) - more-better-words

Day 7: Favourite Favourite Minor/Background Character

Art:

Reverend Kilburn - the-empty-man

Brunel - ciotkahermenegilda

Fics:

Omnia bene, quod desinit bene - littlebookreader

Going up? - leliesblou

Mrs Pomligan - scraprat

Usquam, ego sum, fieri (Parts 1, 2, 3, 4, 5) - littlebookreader

The Traitor - shutupeiffel

Other:

Jasper the Ultra-Capitalist Cabbie (appreciation post) - more-better-words

_

If we've missed anything or made any mistakes, please do not hesitate to let us know!

[volturialice]

have you ever thought about archie x jasper relationship? do you think it would be different from the whole alice and jasper thing? i don't really see anyone talking about them what happened to gay vampire rights????

oof. I gotta say, anon, I personally am a jessamine/alice person, not a jasper/archie person.

which I realize makes me sound kinda like a t*rf and I SWEAR I'M NOT, I PROMISE

for me it's a personal hangup—for whatever reason, I have just never been able to get into an m/m ship. I need at least one lady in there somewhere or I will be immediately bored. (I haven't tested this out with all genders—it's possible I could be into dude/agender person or something, idk.)

it's also that archie as a character doesn't appeal to me in that fannish way at all. a lot of my enjoyment of alice is rooted in the Female Gothic and how she's shaped by patriarchy and chooses to perform femininity and stuff. make her a dude, and I lose interest ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

whereas jessamine still retains all the stuff that appeals to me about jasper's character, if that makes sense.

anyway the tl;dr version I think I used when I was explaining to someone why I think fans find edythe so much more likable than edward is "why would you Boy when you could Girl"

(but again I absolutely do not mean this to sound t*rfy or offensive to trans people in any way, this is specifically about my individual shipping preferences in this one silly little fandom ok. you guys can Boy all day if that's what sparks joy and I will support you 100%)

in conclusion, I very much agree with your larger point—we need more queer twilight fic in this fandom. smeyer literally made it SO EASY for us. as usual, y'all can feel free to send recs my way anytime!

[missingrobin]

blog and request rules!

hi loves I just wanted to clarify some things before I reopened my requests and continued writing

BLOG RULES & REMINDERS

- This blog is a safe place for poc and lgbtq+ individuals, any hate or disrespect will not be tolerated

- none of my work has been uploaded to ao3 or wattpad so if you see it there it's not there with my consent unless I've said otherwise

REQUEST RULES & REMINDERS

Formula for a request

genre (fluff, angst , hurt comfort,) + character(s) + prompt and/or general idea

-Please do not send in a request without looking at this first!

-Also the more specific you're with the request the easier it is to write so please give me a few details

- I will not write hardcore smut, non/con, suicide, teen pregnancy, incest, adult/minor relationships, race fics ex: black!reader x ___ my reasoning for this is I want everyone to be able to see themselves in my fics regardless of race but I definitely respect seeking out fics with your race, and public figures

-I will write character deaths, poly relationships, male, female, non binary readers, spoilers, generally most SFW topics, soft smut

CHARACTERS AND FANDOMS I WRITE FOR

Marvel

steve rogers | bucky barnes | thor | loki | wanda mazimoff | natasha romanoff | bruce banner | peter parker

Legend of Korra

Asami Sato | Korra | Bolin | Kuvira | Kya | Eska | P'li | Ming-Hua | Suyin Beifong | Lin Beifong | Opal | Wei Beifong | Huan Beifong | General Iroh

Atla

Zuko | Katara | Sokka | Suki | Toph | Jet | Mai | Ty Lee | Azula

Riverdale

Archie | Jughead | Toni Topaz | Sweet Pea

Stranger Things

Steve Harrington | Billy Hargrove | Robin Buckley

The Maze Runner

Thomas | Newt | Minho | Frypan | Teresa | Brenda

Twilight

Jasper Hale | Rosalie Hale | Emmett Cullen | Edward Cullen | Alice Cullen | Jacob Black | Leah Clearwater | Seth Clearwater | Paul Lahote

Harry Potter

Luna Lovegood | Neville Longbottom | Ron Weasley | Ginny Weasley | Fred Weasley | George Weasley | Sirius Black | Hermione Granger

My Hero Academia

Shoto Todoroki | Izuku Midoriya | Katsuki Bakugo | Ejirou Kirishima | Tamaki Amajiki | Hawks | Dabi | Tomura Shigaraki | Shouta Aizawa | Kyouka Jiro | Momo Yaoyorozu | Hitoshi Shinsou | Mina Ashido

Send me a request!

[twilightishot]

I kind of want to just make a big long post about my fancasts for the Cullen’s. So, here’s that:

Bella: I imagine her as either Kristen Stewart, Nayeon from Twice, or Emily Rudd but my fave is Nayeon.

Edward: Kj Apa with red hair, and that’s it.

Jacob: Michael Hudson or Booboo Stewart.

Alice: Bekah Martinez or Adelaide Kane.

Jasper: Dev Patel. This also kind of goes along with him and Rosalie being “twins” but also because I like it. In some fics I change Jasper’s whole character and backstory, so it makes sense? But never forget, original Jasper is a racist confederate dipshit.

Rosalie: It’s kind of weird but Jameela Jamil. I just think she’s so pretty. Nikki Reed is still good, though.

Emmett: Jooheon from Monsta X (inspired by @ultward) or Keith Powers.

Esme: Rachel McAdams and Elizabeth Reaser, because her and Sarah Paulson are the best gay parents.

Renesmee - Katherine Langford and Mackenzie Foy. If Bella is Nayeon, then Lia from Itzy. I know Renesmee has red hair but I like to imagine her looking more like Bella, I guess.

Now for Life and Death:

Beau - Logan Lerman and Young Elliot Page.

Edythe - Holland Roden!!!

Julie - Devery Jacobs!!!

Archie - Nicholas Hoult.

Royal - Chris Hemsworth.

Carine - Sarah Paulson (is there any other option?)

There is no point to this but I wanted to share :) Should I do a wolf pack post? Lemme know!!

[constant-creative-chaos]

Fandoms I’ll write for and how to request them

Bold - Personal Favorites

Supernatural

Dean Winchester - Platonic, Sibling, Romantic

Sam Winchester - Platonic, Sibling, Romantic

Castiel - Platonic, Sibling

Jack Kline - Platonic, Sister, Romantic

Gabriel - Platonic, Sibling, Romantic

Charlie - Platonic, Sibling, Romantic (female reader )

Jo - Platonic, Sibling, Romantic

Ellen - Platonic, Child

Bobby - Platonic, Child

Claire - Platonic, Sibling, Romantic

The Walking Dead 

Rick Grimes - Platonic, Child, Sibling, Romantic

Glenn Rhee - Platonic, Sibling, Romantic

T-Dog - Platonic, Sibling

Shane Walsh - Platonic, Sibling, Romantic

Michonne - Platonic, Sibling, Child, Romantic

Maggie Greene - Platonic, Sibling, Romantic

Beth Greene - Platonic, Sibling, Romantic 

Tara Chamlber - Platonic, Sibling, Romantic (female reader)

Rosita - Platonic, Sibling, Romantic

Abraham - Platonic, Sibling, Romantic

Noah - Platonic, Sibling, Romantic

Daryl Dixon - Platonic, Sibling, Romantic

Carl Grimes - Platonic, Sibling, Romantic

Carol - Platonic, Child

Andrea - Platonic, Sibling, Romantic

Negan - Plationic, Child

Enid - Platonic, Sibling, Romantic

Jesus - Platonic, Sibling, Romantic (male reader)

The 100

Bellamy Blake - Plationic, Sibling, Romantic

Clarke Griffin - Platonic, Sibling, Romantic

John Murphy - Platonic, Sibling, Romantic

Raven Reyes - Platonic, Sibling, Romantic

Wells Jaha - Platonic, Sibling, Romantic

Finn - Platonic, Sibling, Romantic

Octavia Blake - Platonic, Sibling, Romantic

Abby Griffin - Platonic, Sibling

Jasper Jorden - Platonic, Sibling, Romantic

Monty Green - Platonic, Sibling, Romantic

Marcus Kane - Platonic, Child

Lexa - Platonic, Sibling, Romantic

Indra - Platonic, Sibling

Anya - Platonic, Sibling, Romantic

Echo - Platonic, Sibling, Romantic

Lincoln - Platonic, Sibling, Romantic

Harry Potter

Harry Potter - Platonic, Sibling, Romantic

Hermione Granger - Platonic, Sibling, Romantic

Ron Weasley - Platonic, Sibling, Romantic

Cedric Diggory - Platonic, Sibling, Romantic

Draco Malfoy - Platonic, Sibling, Romantic

Fred Weasley - Platonic, Sibling, Romantic

George Weasley - Platonic, Sibling, Romantic

Percy Weasley - Platonic, Sibling

Bill Weasley - Platonic, Sibling

Charlie Weasley - Platonic, Sibling, Romantic

Ginny Weasley - Platonic, Sibling, Romantic

Young!Sirius Black - Platonic, Sibling, Romantic

Young!Remus Lupin - Platonic, Sibling, Romantic

Young!James Potter - Platonic, Sibling, Romantic

Young!Lily Evens - Platonic, Sibling, Romantic

Sirius Black - Platonic, Sibling, Child, Romantic

James Potter - Platonic, Sibling, Child, Romantic

Remus Lupin - Platonic, Sibling, Child, Romantic

Lily Evens - Platonic, Sibling, Child, Romantic

Minerva Mcgonagall - Platonic, Child

Marvel

Peter Parker - Platonic, Sibling, Romantic

Natasha Romanoff - Platonic, Sibling, Romantic

Tony Stark - Platonic, Child,

Steve Rogers - Platonic, Sibling, Romantic

Bucky Barnes - Platonic, Sibling, Romantic

Wanda Maximoff - Platonic, Sibling, Romantic

Shuri - Platonic, Sibling, Romantic

T’Challa - Platonic, Sibling, Romantic

Carol Danvers - Platonic, Sibling, Romantic

Loki Laufeyson - Platonic, Sibling, Romantic

Riverdale

Jughead Jones - Platonic, Sibling, Romantic

Betty Cooper - Platonic, Sibling, Romantic

Archie Andrews - Platonic, Sibling, Romantic

Veronica Lodge - Platonic, Sibling, Romantic

Cheryl Blossom - Platonic, Sibling, Romantic (female reader)

Toni Topaz - Platonic, Sibling, Romantic

Sweet pea - Platonic, Sibling, Romantic

Fangs - Platonic, Sibling, Romantic (male reader)

Kevin Keller - Platonic, Sibling, Romantic (male reader)

FP Jones - Platonic, Child

Fred Andrews - Platonic, Child

Chilling Adventures Of Sabrina

Sabrina Spellman - Platonic, Sibling, Romantic

Ambrose Spellman - Platonic, Sibling, Romantic

Nicolas Scratch - Platonic, Sibling, Romantic

Prudence - Platonic, Sibling, Romantic

Dorcas - Platonic, Sibling, Romantic

Agatha - Platonic, Sibling, Romantic

Harvey Kinkle - Platonic, Sibling, Romantic

Roz - Platonic, Sibling, Romantic

Theo - Platonic, Sibling, Romantic (male reader)

Caliban - Platonic, Sibling, Romantic

Zelda Spellman - Platonic, Child

Hilda Spellman - Platonic, Child

A Series Of Unfortunate Events

Klaus Baudelaire - Platonic, Sibling, Romantic

Violet Baudelaire - Platonic, Sibling, Romantic

Duncan Quagmire - Platonic, Sibling

Isodora Quagmire - Platonic, Sibling

Montgomery Montgomery - Platonic, Child

Kit Snicket - Platonic, Sibling, Romantic

Hunger Games

Katniss Everdeen - Platonic, Sibling, Romantic

Peeta Mellark - Platonic, Sibling, Romantic

Gale Hawthorne - Platonic, Sibling, Romantic

Finnick Odair - Platonic, Sibling, Romantic

Primrose Everdeen - Platonic, Sibling, Romantic

Haymitch - Platonic, Child

Effie Trinket - Platonic

Pretty Little Liars

Toby Cavvanah - Platonic, Sibling, Romantic

Caleb - Platonic, Sibling, Romantic

Ezra Fitz - Platonic, Sibling, Romantic

Maya - Platonic, Sibling, Romantic (female reader)

Emily Fields - Platonic, Sibling, Romantic (female reader)

Aria Montgomery - Platonic, Sibling, Romantic

Spencer Hastings - Platonic, Sibling, Romantic

Hanna Marin - Platonic, Sibling, Romantic

Alison Dilaurentis - Platonic, Sibling, Romantic

Shadow Hunters

Alec Lightwood - Platonic, Sibling, Romantic (Male Reader)

Jace Herondale - Platonic, Sibling, Romantic

Isabelle Lightwood - Platonic, Sibling, Romantic

Clary Fray - Platonic, Sibling, Romantic

Magnus Bane - Platonic, Sibling, Romantic

Simon - Platonic, Sibling, Romantic

The Vampire Diaries

Damon Salvatore - Platonic, Sibling, Romantic

Stefan Salvatore - Platonic, Sibling, Romantic

Katherine Peirce - Platonic, Sibling, Romantic

Bonnie Bennett - Platonic, Sibling, Romantic

Caroline Forbes - Platonic, Sibling, Romantic

Jeremy Gilbert - Platonic, Sibling, Romantic

Tyler Lockwood - Platonic, Sibling

Klaus Mikealson - Platonic, Sibling, Romantic

Elijah Mikealson - Platonic, Sibling, Romantic

Rebekah Mikealson - Platonic, Sibling

Kol Mikealson - Platonic, Sibling

Marcel - Platonic, Sibling

Kai Parker - Platonic, Sibling

Alaric Saltzman - Platonic, Child

IT

Young!Bill Denbrough - Platonic, Sibling, Romantic

Young!Richie Tozier - Platonic, Sibling, Romantic (Male Reader)

Young!Beverly Marsh - Platonic, Sibling, Romantic

Young!Eddie Kaspbrack - Platonic, Sibling, Romantic

Young!Stanley Uris - Platonic, Sibling, Romantic

Young!Mike Hanlon - Platonic, Sibling, Romantic

Young!Ben Hanscom - Platonic, Sibling, Romantic

Bill Denbrough - Platonic, Sibling, Romantic

Richie Tozier - Platonic, Sibling, Romantic (Male Reader)

Beverly Marsh - Platonic, Sibling, Romantic

Eddie Kaspbrack - Platonic, Sibling, Romantic

Stanley Uris - Platonic, Sibling, Romantic

Mike Hanlon - Platonic, Sibling, Romantic

Ben Hanscom - Platonic, Sibling, Romantic

The Haunting Of Hill House

Young!Steve Craine - Platonic, Sibling, Romantic

Young!Shirley Craine - Platonic, Sibling 

Young!Theo Craine - Platonic, Sibling

Young!Luke Craine - Platonic, Sibling

Young!Nell Craine - Platonic, Sibling

Steve Craine - Platonic, Sibling, Romantic

Shirley Craine - Platonic, Sibling

Theo Craine - Platonic, Sibling, Romantic (Female Reader)

Luke Craine - Platonic, Sibling, Romantic

Nell Craine - Platonic, Sibling, Romantic

Hugh Craine - Platonic, Sibling, Child 

Olivia Craine - Platonic, Sibling, Child

The Good Place

Tahani - Platonic, Sibling, Romantic

Chidi - Platonic, Sibling, Romantic

Eleanor - Platonic, Sibling, Romantic

Jason - Platonic, Sibling  

How to request

For a oneshot:

Leave an ask or message me with the character(s) you want, your pronouns (he/him, she/her, they/them, etc), the plot, the relationship between you and the characters, the ages, and any other character relationships! For oneshots and imagines I’ll only use Y/N.

Example - one shot, Cedric Diggory, They/Them, Cedric helps them study in the library and they end up getting detention for being out after curfew, Romantic (pre established), reader is a 5th year hufflepuff, Cedric is the same age, no extra character relationships!

For Imagines:

Again, leave an ask or message me with the character(s) and plot.

Example - imagine, Dean teasing you about your crush on Charlie!

For headcannons:

Leave an ask or message me with the character(s) and the scenario!!

Example - headcannon, growing up with Alec and Isabelle

For preferences:

Message me or leave an ask with the fandom and the scenario!! Even if the characters aren’t listed above I’ll add them to the preference!!

Example - Preferences, Marvel, your first date.

For mood boards:

Leave a message or an ask with the character(s)/fandom and the scenario!!

Example - Mood board, Being the Co-leader of The 100 with Bellamy and Clarke

For Playlists:

Leave a message or an ask with the character/characters/relationship/setting/scenario/etc and I’ll create a playlist for you! You can add a preference for genre of music but I can’t promise that the playlist will be entirely that genre.

Example - Playlist for fighting walkers with the prison group (Classic rock or alternative please!)

(you can also ask for a playlist for one of my fics!)

Rules for requests:

I will NOT write any r*pe or s*xual assault scenarios, I can do someone making someone else uncomfortable but nothing beyond that!!

I will NOT write and something that involves pedophilia either, age gap is fine though!

I MIGHT write smut

I am happy to write queer relationships, I can use they/them pronouns, and polyamory is welcome!! If you use neo pronouns, I can use those too!

I will always be able to deny requests

If it says male/female/enby reader, I will NOT write a requited romantic scenario with a gender besides the mentioned one

If it doesn’t have a specific gender at the end I will write romantic scenarios with any gender 

[beau-m-swan]

I’ve taken it upon myself to rename some of the L&D counterparts bc smeyer flew off the handle while renaming some of these people 

This is probably gonna get long, so I’ll add a cut

Carlisle/Carine: I kind of like Carine and I couldn’t find anything better, so I’m leaving it.

Esme/Earnest: I fucking hate that name (mainly bc i know someone with that name and he’s a fucking bastard), so I’m changing that one. I chose Ellis. I feel like it fits better with the character and is the name I use for him when I write l&d based fics.

Edward/Edythe: this name change wasn’t awful either, but why did she spell it like that?? So, Edith

Rosalie/Royal: so, fuck smeyer for giving him a name so close that of Rosalie’s r*pist. I wanted to keep the “Ro” and decided to call him Robert.

Emmett/Eleanor: I didn’t hate “Eleanor” but I like Emma better for Emmett’s counterpart

Alice/Archie: I really didn’t like the name “Archie” at first but it’s grown on me. Even so, I’d like to suggest “Andrew” as an alternate

Jasper/Jessamine: I’ve never seen that name before in my life and, while I don’t despise it, I prefer Jeanette, maybe Nette for short?

Bella/Beau: personally, I like Beau, but I can see why some people don’t. So, how about Ben?

Jacob/Julie: I kind of like Jules, so I left it the same

Sam/Sam: with the rest of the pack, smeyer got lazy. like i know it’s Samantha with Sam for short, but really? I picked Savannah but “Sav” (or something similar)

Leah/Lee: again, really? I like Leland, with Lee for short maybe

Seth/Sarah: i feel like Stacy would’ve been alright maybe with people just calling her Stace

Paul/Paula: she just added an A. I liked Paige

OH! i almost forgot

James/Joss: i prefer Jessie over Joss tbh

Victoria/Victor: Valentine wasn’t a super popular name around the time Victoria/Victor was born, but it was in use. Vince also isn’t awful

Laurent/Lauren: Louise might have been a nice alternate

*BONUS NAMES THAT SHE DIDN’T ACTUALLY GIVE US* (i don’t think)

Jared = Jordan

Embry = Ellen

Quill = Quelle (i just searched “qu girl names”, found this and thought it sounded nice

Bree = Beck

Fred = Fay(or some other spelling of the name)

i’m open to suggestions and i know some people are really going to hate these lmao

[goldeneyedgirl]

I love your Alice x Archie x Jasper & Alice x Jessamine x Jasper fics so much. I just wanted to let you know that. I love all of your fics, actually, but I love the 3some verse the most.

Anon, this message just makes me so goddamn happy, I wiggled. I know my threesome nonsense is Tolerated, but to know someone loves them? I'm so happy. It's so silly and I made it serious and I just love the dynamic and the idea that they can be weird and in love together.

If it helps, I have one Alice x Jasper x Archie fic half-done, and I've got bits and pieces of Jess x Jasper x Alice that I should do something with at some point. Oh and some fics literally written to make everyone cry that I don't think I ever posted.

(I do still have the Inexplicable Wedding Porn Fic unfinished and just sitting there, but mostly I look at it and am shocked that I wrote that. Full out-of-body experience.)

[scattered-dreamers]

Twilight: Life and Death

I have many MANY feelings about this.

I want a crossover fic in which something happens and the Cullens/Hales are brought into each other’s universes, along with the Volturi.

You have Royal and Jessamine Hale. Royal lays eyes on Rosalie and his first thought is “Hot damn.” Jessamine, knowing full well who Rosalie is, asks, “Does it count as incest or masturbation if you have sex with another version of yourself?” Jasper, meanwhile, is trying his best to ignore the sexual tension he’s feeling while Jessamine is doing her best to fuel it.

Then you have Alice who glances between Jasper and Jessamine, her eyes positively glowing. She’s excited at the prospect of having not only one Southern beauty, but two. And she adores the way Jessamine and Jasper get along. Jessamine can help Jasper out of his shell in a way Alice never could and she’s forever grateful for that.

Archie and Jessamine were never really a thing in my mind. I just can’t see it. Archie and Emmett on the other hand: Archie is shy. He’s nothing like Alice. He’s quiet, introverted, and is not the social butterfly that Alice is. (If anything, Jessamine is the social butterfly in L&D.) Archie finds himself quietly attracted to the loud, obnoxious personality that is Emmett.

Rose is completely okay with whatever is going on with Emmett and Archie because she finds herself more drawn to Eleanor instead. She feels guilty at first and and completely draws away from Emmett and Eleanor. Instead she hangs around Jasper, Jessamine, and Alice more and more. She’d hang around with Royal too but he’s spending most of his time with Eleanor. When he’s not hanging out with Eleanor, he’s hanging out with Emmett and suping up his jeep.

Eventually, Emmett finds her curled up in their bed and he gently confronts her. He gently pushes her hair behind her ear and kisses her temple. He tells her that he’s been worrying about her because she’s been withdrawn. He thought maybe it was just her anxiety skyrocketing because of all the new arrivals. She gently takes his hand in hers and confesses that she has a massive crush on Eleanor and that her romantic feelings for him are disappating and she hates it and she doesn’t know what to do. He laughs and places another loving kiss on her temple and then tells her to go for it.

Turns out that Royal unashamedly has the hots for his female counterpart and Eleanor is becoming more and more drawn to her as well. So much so that she’s already asked if they could have a threesome of Rosalie was willing. Upon hearing this from Emmett, Rosalie turns a bright shade of red stutters and asks where she can find them. She also tells him that she gives him full permission to go after Archie. (She would have had to be blind not to see how attracted Archie is to Emmett.)

Edward and Edythe get along well, almost like they had grown up together. It turns out they both know what it’s like to have a sibling because it wasn’t just their mom who died way back when. They each also had a sibling of the opposite gender who were both almost 4 when they died. They bond over that and they bond over their respective human. It also turns out that they find themselves more attracted to each other’s human than their own.

Beau and Bella are both okay with that. Beau is taken with Edward’s beauty. He wasn’t aware that there was a chance he was bi but HOLY HELL here it is, staring him in the face. Bella laughs loudly because her male counterpart looks like a fish out of water with his wide eyes, gaping mouth, and inability to breath. She slaps him on the back and then grins at Edythe with bright eyes and a genuine, toothy smile.

This brings us to Charlie and his freak out of “When did we acquire two children?!” over the phone to Renee who has no idea what he’s talking about. “Are you drunk? You and I only have one child and her name is Isabella Swan.” He snaps a picture of both siblings and sends it off to Renee who is flabbergasted. Bella calmly explains to Charlie what happened and he and Renee agree to adopt him as their own.

Carlisle, Carine, Esme, and Earnest get along well, swapping stories about their children and the craziness they get themselves into. They talk the hijinx that they’re children have gotten up to in the past and they talk about the Denali clan. Carlisle and Carine exchange stories of their respective Volturi and the times they’ve had together. They become rather domestic and live in the giant mansion together with all of their children.

Ness does not exist in this AU because the setting for this is somewhere in Eclipse. Before they get married, before the honeymoon. I will make another post about the Volturi soon.

[fandom-oneshots-etc]

Requests are OPEN🎉

Dear All,

Requests are now OPEN! Please feel free to send in your requests. I have listed the characters that I write for below the ‘keep reading’ line. A few things to remember:

I do NOT write ships like Buddie etc. I only write Reader-Inserts.

I only write for characters mentioned in the list as well as any that have been added under the Additional Characters sections on my Masterlist.

I have not yet written SMUT fics, but I am not opposed to doing so.

I do not currently have an uploading schedule, but I will try to get any requests done ASAP.

That’s all there is to say, so feel free to request!

Thanks,

Emily xoxo

Complete Character Masterlist

9-1-1

Eddie Diaz

Evan Buckley

9-1-1 LONE STAR

Carlos Reyes

Judd Ryder

TK Strand

AVENGERS

Bucky Barnes

Loki Laufeyson

Peter Parker

Steve Rogers

Thor Odinson

Tony Stark

BRASSIC

Vinnie O'Neil

CASTLE

Javier Esposito

Kevin Ryan

Richard Castle

CHICAGO FIRE

Kelly Severide

Matt Casey

CHICAGO PD

Antonio Dawson

Jay Halstead

CHRONICLES OF NARNIA

Edmund Pevensie

Peter Pevensie

Prince Caspian

CRIMINAL MINDS

Aaron Hotchner

Derek Morgan

Spencer Reid

FATE THE WINX SAGA

Riven

Sky

FRIENDS

Joey Tribbiani

HARRY POTTER

Draco Malfoy

Fred Weasley

George Weasley

Harry Potter

Ron Weasley

James Potter

Remus Lupin

Sirius Black

HIGH SCHOOL MUSICAL

Troy Bolton

LETHAL WEAPON

Martin Riggs

OUTERBANKS

JJ Maybank

John B. Routledge

Rafe Cameron

Topper Thornton

RIVERDALE

Archie Andrews

FP Jones

Jughead Jones

Reggie Mantle

Sweet Pea

RIZZOLI & ISLES

Frankie Rizzoli

SHAMELESS

Carl Gallagher

Kevin Ball

Lip Gallagher

SHERLOCK

Mycroft Holmes

Sherlock Holmes

SONS OF ANARCHY

Chibs Telford

Happy Lowman

Jax Teller

Juice Ortiz

Opie Winston

Tig Trager

SUPERNATURAL

Castiel

Crowley

Dean Winchester

Sam Winchester

TEEN WOLF

Derek Hale

Stiles Stilinski

THE ORIGINALS

Elijah Mikaelson

Klaus Mikaelson

Kol Mikaelson

THE VAMPIRE DIARIES

Damon Salvatore

Jeremy Gilbert

Matt Donovan

Stefan Salvatore

Tyler Lockwood

TWILIGHT

Carlisle Cullen

Edward Cullen

Emmett Cullen

Jacob Black

Jasper Hale

Paul Lahote

Seth Clearwater

YOUTUBERS

Colby Brock

[urwarriorangel]

<3 urwarriorangel’s writing challenge <3

hello my darling angels! i have started a writing challenge because i want to read more of what you write. i’m calling this a challenge because that’s what i’ve read others call it? rules are listed below! all submissions will be read by yours truly and (if they follow the p basic rules) i will post them all on a masterlist! i will reblog them and give you feedback because that’s what should happen regardless and also i love you guys! (gif not mine!)

rules

*no rape/incest/underage sex/etc.

*if you choose to write smut, you must be 18+!!! the characters you’re writing for must be 18+!!

*must be character x reader! you can write for multiple characters, but it still must be a reader insert!

*it’s first come first serve for characters, meaning there are character limits. multiple people can write for the same character, but they are capped. so please message me as soon as you see a character you want to write for!

*only one prompt per fic! (bonus points if you use any of my original prompts lol!) (also prompts can only be used once)

*triggers must be tagged. if there are any triggers in your fic, you must have a trigger warning. i cannot emphasize this enough.

*fic should be at least 500 words, if it’s longer (which please make it as long as you’d like!) you have to add a ‘read more’

*must tag me in the fic and use # urwarriorangelwritingchallenge <3

*fic should be a new original, not an old piece being resubmitted or a part of an already existing series. (you can write a series for this challenge if you’d like!)

*bonus points if you’re a poc!writer with a poc!reader <3 <3 <3

*you must respect the sexuality of the character! if you would like for an lgbtq+ character, their sexuality should not change in the fic. thank you!

*please send me a message with the character(s) you’d like to write for and the prompt!

example: damon salvatore + “i don’t know how much longer i can go on”

~the masterlist will be posted on august 13th! (if this goes well aka if people participate i would love to do this more often!)~

categories allowed:

anything your heart desires. if you’re going to write fluff please keep it compelling! add a few different styles together! give me some angst, some smut. make it a mystery! i mean absolutely no disrespect to those who write/read only fluff, but personally i find fluff a little more fun when it’s got multiple components! (if you write only fluff, please go ahead and write fluff! i will read it and i’m sure i’ll love it! these are just my personal preferences!)

i love aus very much, so please don’t shy away from them!

characters & prompts under the cut!

characters (five slots for each character)

agents of shield

al mackenzie antoine “trip” triplett daisy “skye” johnson grant ward jemma simmons lance hunter leopold fitz lincoln campbell

brooklyn 99

amy santiago charles boyle gina linetti jake peralta raymond holt rosa diaz terrence jeffords

buffy the vampire slayer

angel buffy summers cordelia chase rupert giles william the bloody aka spike

criminal minds

aaron hotchner david rossi derek morgan elle greenaway emily prentiss jennifer jareau luke alvez penelope garcia spencer reid

defenders-ish

billy russo frank castle jessica jones luke cage matt murdock

friends

chandler bing joey tribbiani monica geller phoebe buffay rachel green ross geller

game of thrones

arya stark benjen stark daenerys targaryen eddard stark jaime lannister jon snow khal drogo robb stark samwell tarly sansa stark tyrion lannister

gossip girl

blair waldorf carter baizen chuck bass dan humphrey nate archibald serena van der woodsen vanessa abrams

harry potter

draco malfoy fred weasley george weasley harry potter hermione granger remus lupin ronald weasley sirius black (young) tom riddle

hawaii five-0

adam noshimuri chin ho kelly daniel williams kono kalakaua michael noshimuri steve mcgarrett

jane the virgin

adam alvaro jane gloriana villanueva petra solano rafael solano

lucky number slevin

slevin kelevra

mcu

bruce banner aka hulk brunnhilde aka my valkyrie queen bucky barnes aka winter soldier clint barton aka hawkeye drax aka the destroyer erik stevens aka killmonger gamora aka um need we say more? janet van dyne aka wasp loki aka loki m’baku aka you already know mantis aka mantis aka a fucking cutie may parker aka ailf nakia aka loml okoye aka incredible badass peggy carter aka kickass peter parker aka spider-man peter quill aka star-lord pietro maximoff aka quicksilver sam wilson aka falcon scott lang aka antman shuri aka an angel stephen strange aka dr. strange steve rogers aka captain america t’challa aka black panther thor aka thor tony stark aka iron-man wanda maximoff aka scarlet witch

new girl

coach nick miller

pretty little liars

aria montgomery caleb rivers emily fields ezra fitz hanna marin jason dilaurentis mona vanderwaal noel kahn spencer hastings wren kingston

reign

francis mary stuart nostradamus sebastian

riverdale

archie andrews betty cooper cheryl blossom fangs fogarty fp jones fred andrews jason blossom josie mccoy jughead jones kevin keller malachai charles!reggie mantle ross!reggie mantle sweet pea toni topaz valerie brown veronica lodge

shadowhunters

alec lightwood clary fray isabelle lightwood jace herondale lucian grey magnus bane simon lewis

teen wolf

allison argent chris argent cora hale derek hale isaac lahey jackson whittermore jordan parrish kira yukimura liam dunbar lydia martin malia tate peter hale scott mccall stiles stilinski theo raeken

the 100

bellamy blake clarke griffin echo finn collins jasper jordan john murphy king roan lexa lincoln monty green nathan miller octavia blake ontari raven reyes wells jaha

the originals

davina claire elijah mikaelson freya mikaelson hayley marshall kol mikaelson lucian castle niklaus mikaelson marcel gerard rebekah mikaelson

the vampire diaries

bonnie bennett caroline forbes damon salvatore elena gilbert jeremy gilbert katherine pierce malachi parker mary louise matt donovan nora hildegard olivia parker tyler lockwood stefan salvatore sybil

x-men

alex summers aka havok charles xavier aka young!professor x erik lehnsherr aka magneto hank mccoy aka beast jean grey aka phoenix logan aka wolverine peter maximoff aka quiksilver ororo monroe aka storm raven darkholme aka mystique

prompts (once someone requests a prompt, i will update the list! list will be updated once a day, if multiple people ask for a prompt in between updates, i will give it to the first person who sent me an ask. i realize that there are more character options than there are prompts, i did this because i don’t think too many people will participate. if we ever run out, i will add more prompts! example of request: klaus mikaelson + “give me a chance”)

(rfaimagining)

angst

1: “ give me a chance. ”

2: “ not you again.. ”

3: “ leave me alone. ”

4: “ i don’t love you anymore. ”

5: “ why do you hate me? ”

6: “ i lost the baby. ”

7: “ i thought you loved me. ”

8: “ i don’t need you anymore. ”

9:“ i can’t believe you! ”

10: “ we can't keep this up forever. ”

11: “ you’re a monster. ”

12: “ i hate you. ”

13: “ don’t leave me… ”

14: “ you’re a disappointment. ”

15: “ don’t die on me– please. ”

16: “ i never meant to hurt you. ”

17: “ are you upset with me? ”

18: “ i wish i’d never met you. ”

19: “ i’m going to kill you! ”

20: “ please don’t hurt me like this. ”

21: “ thanks for nothing. ”

22: “ dont call this number again. “

23: “ why did you spare me? ”

24: “ you need to leave. ”

25: “ i’m sick. ”

26: “ i’m dying. ”

27: “ i wish i’d never met you. ”

28: “ i thought we were family!”

29: “ there was never an us. ”

30: “ so that’s it? it’s over? ”

31: “ i fucked up. ”

32: “ i came to say goodbye. ”

33:“ he’s dead because of you. ”

34: “ i don’t deserve to be loved. ”

35: “ about the baby… its yours. ”

love

36: “ i’m so in love with you. ”

37: “ dance with me! ”

38: “ isn’t this amazing? ”

39: “ i wish we could stay like this forever. ”

40: “ will you marry me? ”

41: “ i’m pregnant. ”

42: “ i need a hug. ”

43: “ you’re special to me. ”

44: “ i’m going to keep you safe. ”

45: “ do you trust me? ”

46: “ can i kiss you right now? ”

47: “ you’re cute when you’re angry. ”

48: “ i’ve liked you for awhile now. ”

49: “ let’s have a baby. ”

50: “ we’d make such a cute couple. ”

51: “ i want to take care of you. ”

52: “ can we cuddle? ”

53: “ it’s lonely here without you. ”

54: “ i can’t stand the thought of losing you. ”

55: “ shut up and kiss me already. ”

56: “ are you flirting with me? ”

57: “ is that my shirt? ”

58: “ how did we get here? ”

59: “ you own my heart. ”

60: “ you’d be a great dad. ”

61: “ you’d be a great mom. ”

62: “ i want to protect you. ”

63: “ what's the matter? ”

64: “ you’re so beautiful. ”

65: “ did you do something different with your hair? ”

66: “ is that a new perfume? ”

67: “ stop being so cute. ”

68: “ you’re making me blush! ”

69: “ you’re teasing me again… ”

70: “ this is why i fell in love with you. ”

71: “ you’re the best! ”

72: “ they’re going to love you, don’t worry! ”

73: “ oh, are you ticklish? ”

74: “ of course i remembered! ”

75: “ you’re one hell of a girl. ”

76: “ you’re one hell of a guy. ”

77: “ are you jealous? ”

78: “ hold me and never let me go. ”

79: “ stop hogging all the blankets! ”

80: “ lets run away together. ”

misc

90: “ catch me if you can! ”

91: “ i’m fine. ”

92: “ are you drunk? ”

93: “ are you high? ”

94: “ we can't go in there… ”

95: “ give it back! ”

96: “ well this is just great. ”

97: “ don’t touch me. ”

98: “ not sure if you could tell, but i’m not exactly a people person. ”

99: “ this was fun— let's do it again sometime!”

100: “ i didn’t do it! ”

101: “ i did it… ”

102: “ i don’t remember that! ”

103: “ well that’s pretty rude of you to say. ”

104: “ get that thing away from me! ”

105: “ you owe me. ”

106: “ do you believe in aliens? ”

107: “ do you believe in ghosts? ”

108: “ are you hitting on me? ”

109: “ why are you naked? ”

110: “ you did what?! ”

111: “ you have… superpowers? ”

112: “ why are you bleeding? ”

113: “ where did all these puppies come from?”

114: “ don’t make me come over there myself! ”

115: “ that wasn’t funny. ”

116: “ this tastes horrible. ”

117: “ this is delicious! ”

118: “ are you mad at me? ”

119: “ stop ignoring me… ”

120: “ i love that show too! ”

121: “ can i borrow that book of yours?”

122: “ let's blow this joint. ”

123: “ let me help you with that. ”

124: “ take that back! ”

125: “ wanna go see a movie with me? ”

126: “ no way, that’s so lame. ”

127: “ what are you listening to? ”

128: “ i brought you your coffee. ”

129: “ don’t fuck this up. ”

130: “ run! ”

131: “ lets run away together. ”

132: “ i haven’t slept in four days… ”

133: “ your turn to do the dishes. ”

134: “ was i really that drunk? ”

135: “ was i really that stoned? ”

136: “give me back my phone! ”

137: “ you’re an asshole. ”

138: “ are you cold? ”

139: “ this place gives me the creeps. ”

140: “ i swear my house is haunted. ”

141: “ did you hear that? ”

142: “ it’s just your imagination. ”

143: “ just how stupid do you think i am? ”

144: “ stop being such a baby. ”

145: “ go back to bed. ”

146: “ are you okay? ”

147: “ i can take care of myself just fine.”

148: “ thanks for helping me back there. ”

149: “ since when have we ever been friends? ”

150: “ what on earth are you wearing? ”

151: “ i can’t feel my legs! ”

152: “ stop texting me weird stuff so late at night. ”

153: “ put me down! ”

154: “ there’s only one bed… ”

155: “ it isn’t what it looks like! okay.. maybe it is… ”

156: “ how did i lose it? ”

157: “ i read your diary. ”

158: “ this is awkward. ”

159: “ didn’t you read the sign? ”

160: “ do you think you can teach me that? ”

nsfw

161: “ bite me. ”

162: “ make me. ”

163: “ fuck me. ”

164: “ stop teasing me so much… ”

165: “ do you like it when i touch you like that?”

166: “ okay.. this is new. ”

167: “ want to head back to my place and have a little fun? ”

168: “ you’re in trouble now. ”

169: “ what a pretty sight. ”

170: “ bend over. ”

171: “ on your knees. ”

172: “ the food looks great but.. there’s something much more delicious i’d like to eat right now. ”

173: “ lay back. ”

174: “ take off your clothes. ”

175: “ well, fine; just this once. ”

176: “ i’m waiting. ”

177: “ you’re so beautiful. ”

178:“ as you wish. ”

179: “ first one to make a noise loses.”

180: “ you have no idea what you do to me. ”

181: “ if you’re bored; wanna have sex? ”

182: “ i've wanted this for so long. ”

183: “ car sex looks so much more easier in the movies. ”

184: “ can i touch you? ”

185: “ open up. ”

186: “ no strings attached. ”

187: “ already? do i really have that much of an effect on you? ”

188: “ mine. ”

189: “ the nights still young. ”

190: “ we can't do that here! ”

191: “ behave. ”

192:“ what did you just say? ”

193: “ good girl. ”

194: “ good boy. ”

195: “ come here. ”

continued nsfw from misc sources

196: “are you going to come here, or are you going to make me come get you myself?”

197: “don’t look at me like that, you brought this on yourself.”

198: “stay still, squirming will make it worse.”

199: “keep count. if you lose it, we’re starting over. understand?”

200: “go get me the cane.”

201: “take your shirt off and put your hands up against the wall.”

202: “open your mouth. i’m putting the gag in so your screaming won’t alarm someone.”

203: “did you disobey my orders?”

204: “i thought i told you not to touch that?”

205: “have you finished everything i told you to do?”

206: “if you don’t stop acting like this, i’ll be forced to use different tactics.”

207: “your skin turns so red under my palm.”

208: “bend over the back of the couch.”

209: “you might want to bite something, the whip has a bite to it.”

210: “come here and bend over my lap.”

211: “i’m tired of your smart mouth.”

212: “you’re really hot.”

213: “oh, don’t mind me. just enjoying the view.”

214: “you know, those/that ______ of yours are/is pretty distracting.”

215: “hot damn.”

216: “so, you come here often?”

217: “well, well. my night just got better.”

218: “is that a gun in your pocket or are you just happy to see me?”

219: “you have got a great ass.”

220: “hey, i’m open minded.”

221: “you enjoying the view over there?”

222: “keep sweet-talking and this could go a whole new direction.”

223: “don’t be bashful. you know you want to.”

224: “you can have me any way you’d like, baby.”

225: “you wanna move this conversation someplace more private?”

226: “i’m off in a few minutes, you know.”

227:“it’s been a long day. why don’t we help each other unwind?”

228: “i think it’s about time we stop avoiding the obvious.”

229: “i’m gonna be honest with you. i’m really horny, and you’re really hot. can we fuck? like, now?”

230: “i wanna see you get naked.”

231: “you like how i bend over for you, huh?”

232: “you’re getting me all worked up.”

233: “what do we have here?”

234: "i see someone’s happy to see me.”

235: “play your cards right, and i just might have to put you on speed dial.”

236: “you like that, don’t you?”

237: “how do you want me?”

238: “i’m sure we can put those lips to better use.”

239: “i want you. right here. right now.”

240: “god, you’re perfect.”

241: “i really like a man who’s good with his hands.”

242: “i’d be more than happy to show you a good time, if you’re looking for one.”

243: “i saw that. you just checked me out.”

244: “you look real good in that suit/dress/skirt/outfit.”

245: “you wanna help me out of this ___?” (insert article clothing here.)

246: “can i keep you?”

247: “you’re such a tease.”

248: “oh my, looks like i/you dropped something.”

249: “i love it when you talk dirty.”

250: “i can’t stop thinking about your hands on me.”

251: “i think you’ll be happy to know that i’m not wearing any underwear.”

252: “i really want to take you home and get you out of all those clothes.”

253: “it’s like you want to ruin men/women for me.”

[gashousegables]

got any alice/jasper stories in the works?

Yeah! In order of done-ness:

I’ve got a Jasper/Archie one shot that’s actually mainly Rosalie/Eleanor femme/butch goodness. There’s a Jasper and Eleanor backstory branching off of it that’s no where near as done.

I’ve got a Mob!AU that’s also Ed/Jake, because consistency is my jam.

I’ve got a treasure-planet-world inspired fairy tale that a fun mix of fae, witches, selkies and ships. There’s a changling child and sirens I’m really fond of it. Been working on it for about 3 years.

There’s a Jasper/Alice fic in the works where Alice is a ghost haunting her old apartment and Jasper moves in.

DITS is getting a prequel sequel

There’s another one where Alice is blind and Bella is her seeing-eye dog

And there’s one where they’re robots and Jasper was used for war and Alice’s memory card was wiped but I don’t know where I’m going with it. That one might go no where, needs a good hard workshop.