#my idea i came up with is (in my opinion) so fucking interesting and cool and i'm so excited to debut it

[minhosimthings]

Prideful

Synopsis: You never thought that Lee Heeseung, the man who had proven you wrong in the subject you were best at, would be fucking you on the classroom floor, but here you were.

Pairings: Heeseung × fem!reader, sort of enemies hate sex, includes Sunoo from Enha, and Soojin

Warnings: Smut with plot in the beginning, MINORS DNI, fluffy in the beginning, mention of food, degradation, praise, fingering, oral (f receiving), sex on the floor, unprotected sex (not for you bubs), rough sex, overstimulation, swearing, Heeseung calls reader princess and doll, open ending my babies have fun with that

A/N: idea came into my brain and I thought I'd forget about it and just added it to my wip list but then I was like NOPE IMMA WRITE THIS SHIT. So this makes my third smut for Heeseung (idk why I'm writing only smut for him) enjoy it y'all

Jane Austen once wrote an entire fanfic about enemies to lovers, slow burn, and she thought no one would notice. Well almost no one. Nothing ever gets out of the eyes and pens of literature majors does it? Especially not out of hardcore Jane Austen fans like yourself.

You must have analysed that godforsaken piece of literature atleast a thousand times since you recieved it as a gift for your birthday. And every single time, you failed to understand how such a love could be possible. I mean come on, a man and woman who hate each other, falling in love with each other? Either Jane Austen must have been a reincarnation of Aphrodite, or a madwoman who still kept faith in love.

Your heart nearly exploded when your professor had assigned a full fledged essay-presentation, costing half your grade on Pride and Prejudice. "Explore your opinion!" She had called out cheerfully, "Tell me what your heart truly feels about this beautiful piece and I'll give you a full half grade and no assignments for the rest of the semester." The class gasped in excitement at her words as you pretended to be interested. Internally, you were groaning. Wasting half of your night to make a presentation about a book you hold no love for? The universe really was against you. You picked your books up dejectedly and walked towards the entrance, shoulders hunched and music at a higher level of noise than it should have been at.

"Oh shit!" You cursed, dropping your books at the sudden interruption. A flurry of blue wool flooded in your face, as you leaned down quickly to pick up your fallen books and phone. "I'm so sorry." You apologised not looking up at whoever you crashed into. "It's alright." A voice responded back, and you looked up to see him. Lee Heeseung. You had seen him a few times in class, heard him actually. With his pristine glasses, and his woolen sweaters, he was the definition of a movie nerd. He was actually smart, you had to admit, always quick to respond to the questions that you had no idea about. Best in the class after you, according to your professor. Although his choice of literature slightly weirded you out. You often spotted him sprawled out under a tree, holding Pride and Prejudice to his nose, deeply engrossed in taking in each word.

"Is that The Neighborhood you're listening to?" Heeseung asked, as he handed you your phone, which he had picked up before you had the chance to. "Do you have an ear for them?" You asked, taking the phone from him. His hands felt soft, like the first snow when you were eight. Heeseung shook his and chuckled. "I'm more of a Arctic Monkeys person." You smiled awkwardly and shuffled your feet. "To each his own then."

"Macbeth." Heeseung said, before you could escape from the conversation. "I'm sorry?" You questioned, confused at his sudden outburst. "That line's from Macbeth." Heeseung sent another smile your way, pushing his glasses up from his nose, "Polonius says it, 'To each his own'." You felt a pang of jealousy hit your chest. You didn't know where that line was from. Of course, what normal person would know the origin of a common idiom?

"Cool." Your laugh was not without a tint of awkwardness. "Well-" Heeseung shifted his weight from one foot to the other, "Bye then." "Bye." You bid each other goodbye and rushed off in opposite directions, not wanting to be stuck in another neverending loop of conversation.

"Don't tell me you actually talked with The Lee Heeseung." Your roommate Soojin laughed, accidentally smearing some turquoise nail polish onto your thigh. You quickly wiped it off with a tissue before frowning at Soojin. "It's not a big deal." You scoffed, having another slice of pizza, "I mean he's just a guy. Kinda nerdy actually"

Soojin burst out laughing again, this time shutting her nail polish close. She gasped for air as she pulled out her phone and showed you a picture of a what looked like a frat party. "Girl-" she got up from her leaning position, "Nerdy is the worst way to describe Lee Heeseung. I'm telling you-" she picked up the last slice of pizza, "-he's the playboy representative of this college."

"Oh come on." You scoffed again, getting up to go to the bathroom, "Stop joking around." Soojin shrugged her shoulders as you disappeared into the bathroom. "Whatever you say."

The next day, you strolled into your favourite cafe with your laptop, headphones, a copy of Pride and Prejudice, money in your pocket, a sketchbook, and a positive mindset. Always need one to write an essay right? You were thankful that it wasn't raining today like it had been for the past few weeks.

The cafe was mostly empty, with a few medical students drinking coffee to their death, as they always did. You walked up to the counter, where you saw your friend Sunoo, working his shift.

"Y/N hey!" He flashed his bright smile at you, putting down the glass he had been cleaning. "Hey sun." You clapped back, leaning in front of the counter, "The usual please." Sunoo nodded his head and started to prepare your drink. "So I've heard something." He put on his mischievous smile, one that he often wore when he had gossip on his fingers. "Please tell me it's not about that girl from Chem again." You sighed, as he put a coffee cup down in front of you. "No it's about you dumbass." Sunoo scoffed, taking the money you handed him, "I heard you bumped into Lee Heeseung." You let out a groan at his words, and quickly grabbed your drink, going off to sit in the corner. "Yah take your change!" Sunoo shouted after you to which you shouted back, "Keep it! Your broke ass needs it anyway!"

You didn't get the chance to see Sunoo giving you the stink eye, as you plopped down on the comfortable couch and opened up your laptop. You had prepared a few opening lines the night before, since you had learnt that doing half of an assignment on the day of the announcement is better than starting the next day. Whoever wrote that theory needs to clarify it to you, but hey never pass up a good study tip right?

Immersed by the clacking of the keyboard keys and the pretty syllables decorating your page, you were completely absent from the world around you. Until, you heard a familiar voice, which broke you out of your hypoxia.

Heeseung.

What was he doing here?, You thought, not realising that you were basically staring at him. He was dressed in full black today, a leather jacket adorning his broad shoulders. A single earing dangled from his right ear. He still had his glasses on, which were fogged up completely, courtesy to the weather outside. Chatting away sonderly to Sunoo, as Sunoo prepared his drink in a way familiar to you, Heeseung caught your eye. He waved joyfully to you, akin to a child waving to their best friend. You waved back, not aware of the face you were currently making.

"Hey!" Heeseung said, sitting down in the chair next to you, with his drink in hand, "Working up on the Pride and Prejudice thing?" There were atleast a million other seats empty in the cafe. Why did he have to sit next to you? You didn't really realise how handsome he was, until he was sitting face to face with you. The mere sunlight coming in from the windows seemed to illuminate his face well. "Oh yeah I am." You replied, shooting him a smile, "Same thing?" You asked, wanting to keep the conversation going. Heeseung smiled jovially at you and propped his laptop open. "Yep." He replied and glued his eyes to the screen as you went back to your own work. "The Neighborhood again?" He raised an eyebrow, peeking at your open Spotify. You smiled gently and replied, "Arctic Monkeys?" As if ticking a correct answer, Heeseung laughed and showed you his phone where 'Arabella' was playing. A pretty album cover, you thought, subtle and sleek. "To each his own then?" Heeseung said. You nodded and smiled in response, before dropping your head back down to your laptop.

An hour must have passed like this, both of you hypnotised in writing and editing, and downing the refills of coffee Sunoo was providing you with. You stole tiny glances at Heeseung from time to time. Concentration was a good face on him, his eyebrows furrowed, his hands typing away furiously at the keyboard. He didn't talk to you at all, except for the initial hey and hello. But something about the way he spoke to you in the beginning, about the way he asked if you had a pen, and about the way he said 'Hey you have an eyelash on your nose' made your stomach erupt into butterflies.

Heeseung left before you did and before leaving he had extended a hand out to you. "May the best essay win." He spoke, shaking your hand and showing you his smile. God he never stopped smiling did he? His hand was soft, as was his grip on yours. It felt like how your father would hold your hand when you were little on the crosswalk.

"Girl just ask him out." Sunoo called after you as you were about to leave, "The tension between both of you back there was almost poetic." Even though you laughed at Sunoo's quip, and denied the offer, a part of your mind lingered on Sunoo's words and the way Heeseung spoke to you that afternoon.

The days leading upto the hour of the presentation went fast. Too fast almost. Your mind went over your short conversation with Heeseung atleast a million times, sometimes distracting you from typing. You didn't know where all the red bull cans littered across your room came from, but you remember where you threw every single one of them and why. The presentation was perfect. It must have been checked by your eyes atleast a hundred times. Finally, a time was coming when you would be able to express your true feeling about it. Despise and Trouble ran through your veins as you walked up to the board as your professor called on you to present. The class seemed to hold a tight breath to themselves. Everyone knew you, teacher's pet, best at English, known for using the most difficult metaphores in her essays yet having a straightforward point.

"Shall I begin?" You asked your professor who gave a curt nod and leaned back in her chair, an expectant smile plastered on her face. You returned the smile and turned to your classmates, who seemed most interested in your essay.

"Well to begin with, as one does-" humor was always the best way to start off speeches, which was shown by the subtle laughter of the students, "-I would like to say that Pride and Prejudice may be one of the most despised books I have sitting in my bookcase." You heard gasps around the room as everyone started murmerring. Your professor leaned forward in her chair, her mouth pressed tightly to form a thin line. That's good, you thought, a good way to break into their corneas.

"While most people would disagree with me upon this apparent piece of art, I truly believe that this sort of a romance is highly impossible. And no-dont tell me that this is fiction and in the fictious worlds you can quote unquote 'do whatever you want'." The audience held their breaths back as you continued with your rant. Your professor was watching it all with a smile on her face, knowing that she couldn't disagree with you. After all, you had to present your own opinions no matter how opposite they were to everyone else's.

"Well-" you professor stood up from her chair, as you finished your presentation. It had been a 25 minute rant about the book and by now everyone seemed to be meekly looking at their own essays. "That was brilliant Y/N. Truly brilliant." You professor clapped you on the back, "I must say, you have a flair for arguing in a way no one can find counter-attacks. I wonder why you did not choose law as your major?"

"Because there is another argument to be discussed here."

A cold voice rang through the room, as you were about to laugh at the professor's quip. You spun around on your shoes to face the culprit.

Lee Heeseung.

"Heeseung!" Your professor delightfully responded clapping her hands together, "Well why don't you tell us your opinion then? And we'll see if Y/N can fire back." She sat in her chair again, looking positively delighted at the forthcoming, "A battle of the best wits perhaps!"

Heeseung smiled widely and stepped forward to where you were sitting, plopping down on the opposite chair. Your professor had always kept two chairs facing each other in front of her class, for debates, her reason sounded. And now, as you sat in front of Heeseung and his stupidly handsome smirk, you swore you were going to bring him down.

"First of firsts-" Heeseung began, as everyone's attention caught on you. "-your opinion is speaking from a highly biased perspective." "How so?" You fired back, before he could even breathe, "I had already stated in the beginning, about how this cannot be on a biased perspective, since fiction based in actual words cannot be this animated." Heeseung smiled again, which threw you off track a bit. God he's handsome, you thought, too handsome....

"Of course but must I remind you, that this book was perhaps the first out of many to start with the trope of enemies to lovers?" Why were his eyes like galaxies?, "Jane Austen invented an entire trope, which still remains a genius scan of literature to this day. How could you say it's too animated?"

"Yes but-"

"Furthermore-" Heeseung continued, not giving you the chance to breathe, "inventing new tropes does not break this 'law of literature' as you say. Since there was no law of literature to begin with. So please Miss Y/N-" he leaned forward, looking at you with dangerous eyes, "-don't you dare say that Pride and Prejudice is a worthless piece of literature just because it does not have proof of poetry."

The class let out a breath as you sat frozen in your seat. Someone actually breaking your argument was a first for you.

God, his hair. His pretty curly hair.

You didn't realise how long you'd been staring at Heeseung with widened eyes until your professor clapped her hands together again.

"Well then!" She said cheerfully, effectively breaking you out of your stupor, "I believe this goes for grading both of you an A+. Half of your grade is filled you two! Congratulations!" The class broke out into applause as you thanked her and awkwardly shook hands with Heeseung as the bell rang loudly. "Well class I'll be seeing you next time!" Your professor announced, as everyone started filing out. "Oh Y/N, Heeseung a moment please?"

You stopped your feet from stepping out the door and immediately spun around, marching off towards your professor, seeing Heeseung doing the same. "Yes Professor Kim?" Heeseung responded with those stupid puppy eyes of his before you could. Professor Kim smiled gently at both of you, before pulling out her tablet.

"I need a bit of help from both of you. It'll be sort of a favour to you too." She handed you the tablet, which had a sort of letter open on it. Heeseung leaned from behind you, and put his chin on your shoulder, making your stomach feel clammy. He smelled good too, you thought, like fresh paper.

"An event is being hosted by our Dean for all majors." Professor Kim smiled, "Sort of a career booster you could say. We were instructed to pick two students from our classes to have the assignment of checking essays, and documentations and whatnot pertaining to their majors."

"And you chose to pick us Ma'am? I'm flattered." Heeseung chuckled, as Professor Kim laughed to his quip. "Well you two are my best students." She drawled, "So the assignment I'm giving you is-" she pulled out a huge stack of papers from beneath her desk. It shocked you how quickly they appeared out of nowhere, like magic. "-these are all essays collected by last year's class. I want you to go through them, give them a good critic, and grade them according to you. You will personally grade each one, taking each other's help of course,since it's a group project. And it will lend you a helping hand since you'll be getting a certificate which you can use to get into any company you'd like!"

You and Heeseung glanced at each other and we're relieved to see the same excited expression face back at them. This was a rare opportunity, a diamond of the first water you'd say. And you had to grab it, even If that meant it was with a person you despised with your entire being.

"I'll do it Professor!" You replied positively to which Heeseung also nodded frantically as if to say the same thing. "Great!" Professor Kim clapped her hands together again, "Oh and one rule is you two have to work together in this classroom. Since the Dean wants to provide you with an opportunity to see how workplace relationships doon out."

Your heart dropped to your stomach as you heard her words. You, working with Heeseung in an empty classroom? You would rather have praised Pride and Prejudice.

"Here, the keys." Professor Kim handed you and Heeseung a pair of keys, "You can work in the evening if you want. But make sure to complete it as soon as you can alright? Oh and you can skip classes if you want to do this first, since the Dean is prioritising this before anything else." You nodded in response to her instructions and bowed her goodbye as you and Heeseung walked out.

"So-" Heeseung stuffed his hands in his pockets, "You wanna work on this shit tonight?" "Unless you have any other appointments, sure we can work on it tonight." You responded, coldly, not looking at him in the eye. "Alright then." Heeseung scoffed, "Meet you here at 8?" "Alright." The end of your conversation came a little too fast, you thought, but you couldn't stand looking into his pretty little eyes and talking to him, as if he didn't just embarrass you infront of your entire class a few minutes ago. "Y/N wait!" Heeseung called, running up to you, as you were about to exit the building. "What?" You spun around to face him. "Shouldn't we exchange numbers first?" Heeseung handed you his phone, which had his contact list open. "Why? So you can take me out on a date later?" You shot at him. A smirk tugged on the corner of Heeseung lips, but he resisted, not wanting to anger you more. You looked cute when you were angry in his opinion. "No. Maybe incase you were murdered by someone on the way here, I can call you and scold you on why tardiness is a childish thing to do." Heeseung joked. You smiled sarcastically at him as you handed him his phone back, having typed in your number. "Eight o'clock princess don't you forget now."

Tick tock tick. The clock's quiet sons echoed through the empty class. 'Don't forget.' you scoffed, 'And he's the one who's late.' The time on your watch sounded 8:30 and yet Heeseung wasn't here. You had given up waiting for him, and started on the assignment yourself, already finishing two of the army of papers. You were a hard critic, and it clearly showed in the way you were seeping your eyes through the ink.

"Soojin he's late! I can't come back now!" Your roommate had called you, in the midst of your third paper, complaining about a cockroach in the room. "Just call your boyfriend, and don't be such a pussy it won't hurt you." You scoffed at Soojin, whose scared whimpers were heard clearly through the phone.

"How's the checking going?" Soojin asked, having seemingly calmed down. You groaned and leaned back in your chair, wincing at the crack of your backbone. Your back must have become stiff from the amount of time you had been sitting in that chair. You felt pity for your professors for the first time, having finally been in their shoes.

"Heeseung's not here yet and I'm literally so fed up right now." You complained to Soojin, "That handsome bastard told me not to be late, and now look where I am! Asshole seriously." "He'll turn up, cool down Y/N." Soojin soothed you. You heard a sound of crashing in the background and stifled a laugh, assuming that Soojin must have miraculously jumped from one bed to the other. "I told you he's a playboy." Soojin panted through the phone, "Maybe he's busy fucking some poor girl in his frat house." You rolled your eyes at her statement.

"Please." You scoffed, "He couldn't fuck a girl if he wanted to, with the tiny ass cock he has." Soojin let out a raucous laugh from the other side of the phone. "How the fuck do you know he has a tiny cock?" She chuckled. "Intuition baby." You responded, "And my intuition is never wrong."

"Like how it was on the day of our debate?"

A familiar voice again. But this time, the warmth in it wasn't present. You whipped your head around to the door, where Heeseung stood, leaning against the door and smirking. "Soojin I'll call you back." You cut the call, before Soojin could respond.

"Hey." You called out to Heeseung. "Hey." Heeseung shot back, sitting down on the chair in front of you, spreading his legs wide. An involuntary gulp went through your throat. "What were you saying princess?" He leaned forward, his shirt dropping down slightly, "I have a tiny what now?" The dim lighting of the room, made his eyes look dark, and the leather of his black jacket, gleam more. "I- I wasn't saying anything Heeseung." You responded, turning your chair back to the desk, warmth coming up on your cheeks. Heeseung cocked his head to the side and smirked at your flustered state.

"Really princess?" He smirked, edging closer to you. The smell of his cologne filled your nostrils again. His glasses dropped on his nose, and he hadn't even bother to push them back up. "Heeseung just get to work." You sternly responded, trying to keep your cool. How could you though? When he was so close to you, lips almost touching your ear. "For you information-" Heeseung spoke, turning your attention away from the paper you were working on, "-I had a friend who needed a lift to his dorm, so I ran a little late. But you couldn't wait for me could you princess?" He smirked, laying his hand on top of yours, "Just couldn't wait to critique all those papers like the good girl you are." "He-Heeseung." "Shh don't." Heeseung shushed you, "You want to see how tiny of a cock I really have then hmm?"

"Heeseung we shouldn't." You hesitated, feeling your legs warm up. "No one's gonna know, as long as you don't make a noise alright?" He kissed your neck gently, turning your figure to his, still sitting in the chair. "Oh princess, already wet for me?" He chuckled, toying with the button of your shirt. "Heeseung-" you moaned out, quickly unbuttoning your shirt, as Heeseung took off his jacket and threw it on the desk. You pulled back slightly as your mind came to its proper senses. "Where are you going doll?" Heeseung questioned, hands resting on your thigh, squeezing it from time to time, "Don't worry princess, no one's gonna know."

Heeseung brings his lips down to yours in an instant, wasting no time. You gasp at his sudden actions and he takes advantage of that by entering his tongue into your mouth. You grab at his shoulders while he cups your jaw with both of his hands. Your hands reach his hair, softly tugging at the root and you hear him whine. Heeseung sucks on your bottom lip, catching it between his teeth and pulling it back to look at you. You look up at him and he takes your face in his hands.

“You wanna see my cock baby?” Heeseung asks in a teasing tone as he looks down at you. You could feel the throb in his pants press against your legs as you whimper. “Hee please.” You whine, squirming as he places a kiss between your breasts. Heeseung runs his hands up and down the sides of your body. If he was going to fuck you on the classroom floor right there and then, you were going to let him.

“Oh, you're feeling extra polite today huh? Please, Heeseung.” Heeseung mocks you with a tiny laugh. You groan in embarrassment and hide your face with your hands. Heeseung just lets out another laugh and wraps his hands around your wrists, prying them away from your face. He transfers both of your wrists to one hand, holding them over your head as he uses his other hand to trail his fingers down your body.

“Don’t hide your pretty face now, princess.” Heeseung says nonchalantly as he dips a hand inside your leggings and panties to feel your dripping cunt. His glasses were beginning to fog up slightly as he whipped them off of his face, setting them down on the desk. You clench around nothing when you feel his middle finger dip into your wetness and bring it up to your clit, rubbing slow circles around it. You moan softly as Heeseung teases your clit, never taking his eyes off of your face.

Heeseung begins to rub your clit faster, and you buck your hips up into his fingers. You hear him laugh at your eagerness and he presses soft kisses into your neck. Heeseung takes his fingers off of your clit and he snaps the waistband of your trousers against your pelvis.

“Dirty girl. Never thought you'd be like this.” Heeseung says with a smirk and you dumbly nod your head. The sounds of your heavy breathing and your pussy squelching around his fingers make your legs begin to shake.

Heeseung spits on your cunt to lubricate it even more, and that's what makes you come undone. Your cunt clenches around his fingers, sucking them in as he fingers you through your orgasm.

Heeseung takes his time kissing down your body, letting your need and desperation build by the second. He tugs one nipple and then the other into his mouth, suckling at the perky nubs and massaging your areola between his lips. Your hips are trembling with anticipation, the space between your legs aching to feel Heeseung's kiss.

Stars hover over you, or at least, that’s how it feels. Your eyes are closed, awareness cut off to the world around you except the place Heeseung's face is buried. He devours your cunt like a man starved, swallowing you whole. Heeseung doesn’t come up for air; he doesn’t need to, because all he breathes is you. Your back is arched and arms stretched forward, fingers clutching Heeseung’s hair in fistfuls.

Your thighs are shaking, reflexively clamping around Heeseung's’s face. He keeps forcing them open, demanding full access to your cunt, even as you buck and claw and convulse. Your mouth hangs open in a stupor; a thin line of drool trickles down your cheek and connects to the cold floor beneath you.

Heeseung laps at your slit like he’s never tasted you before, like he never will again. His tongue pads between your lips, upward strokes that end with the tip of his tongue flicking your clit with a firm intensity that has you reeling. Tugging at his hair, trying not to scream his name incoherently, you ride out the longest orgasm you’ve ever had. Tears burn the corners of your eyes, stars bursting in the black sky of your vision. Heeseung doesn’t stop licking your cunt till you release his hair.

“M’gonna fuck you now, okay?” Heeseung says sweetly and you nod your head. He runs his hard cock through your folds, and he catches your clit, making you jerk a little. Heeseung slowly begins to push himself into you and you throw your head back against the hard material of the desk.

“Fuck, knew you’d be tight when I felt you around my fingers.” Heeseung grits out, and he continues to push himself into you until he bottoms out. He starts to move at a slow pace, and he whines when you beg him to move faster. “Fucking whore. Bet you think about me fucking you in class don't you?” Heeseung spits out as he pushes himself harder and deeper into your sloppy cunt. You moan at his words, and you try to reply but all that comes out is a pathetic whimper.

“Hee, I’m gonna cum.” You cry out, and you clench around Heeseung's fat cock.

“ Cum for me princess.” Heeseung. moans out, fucking into you so deep, a ring of your cum and his has formed at the base of his cock. You run your fingers through his hair, harshly tugging on it as you come undone at his expense. Heeseung buries his face into your neck as he cums, sucking at your pulse point. You feel his cum shoot into you and it only prolongs your own orgasm.

After a couple minutes of you two catching your breath, Heeseung takes his face out of your neck and plops down in the chair, pulling you onto his lap. You sit there, dazed for a few seconds, burrowing your head in his chest, his heartbeat reminding you where you were.

"Well that was a whirlwind of emotions." He says at last, when you start to stir from your hypnosis, "You good doll?" You nod slightly and feel Heeseung's arms wrap around you, putting you safely down on the chair, as he put his clothes back on, slowly picking up yours as well.

"Heeseung the assignments." You panic, as he puts your shirt back on you. "It's alright princess." He coos at you, wrapping an arm around your waist, "We can do that in the morning. Let's get you home." He guides you slowly out the door. "So-" he smirks, locking the classroom with his key "Same time, same place tomorrow?"

[snakewithawitchhat]

Bill Headcanons

I have enough of these to fill up my guts whatever that means

Includes: Normal, readerxbill platonic, readerxbill romantic, freaky stuff he into

Normal

He definitely said skibidi once because he had no idea what it meant or where it came from

He would probably honest to god enjoy interacting with an iPad kid because he thinks they're fucking funny

Tea person over coffee

Probably reads books on the randomest subjects. Mostly they all have human psychology in common, though. Or anatomy.

His favorite kids movie is Wreck It Ralph, favorite adult movie is Shawn of The Dead (He doesn't believe British people are actually real and finds the movie funny), favorite horror movie is probably something really obscure and is just plain goreporn or something like that.

(In my opinion) I feel like if he had a more anthropomorphic form (legs and arms and body) it would probably be something VERY weird core or something like that. Like, extra limbs, weird ass colors, and random effects. He'd probably keep the triangle imagery, though.

Would definitely just say random ass shit to freak people out

He has a thing for teeth. Not, like, a weird thing or a sex thing. He just really thinks they're cool.

If he had an iPad... he'd spend all day either being your standard reddit user or an iPad kid.

Probably like King from The Owl House sometimes.

Speaking of TOH, he met The Collector once. He thought the kid was neat and played a few games of chess with him before leaving. Probably one of the inspirations for The Collector's insaneness

He also met The Core from Amphibia. Or at least knew the core existed.

His favorite human color is either red, yellow, or orange. It's really everything on the hot side of the color wheel tbh.

Platonic X reader

Dream invasion time-- He would SO rummage through your mind if you made a deal with him.

If you pissed him off, he'd probably jab a fork in your arm while possessing you. He wouldn't be as insane as he was with Stanford's body, though. He wants yours to work properly.

Dream demon or not, he probably had a Drea- NIGHTMARE... it was SO a nightmare... about having more fun with you if you built the portal.

Would be touchy. Not in a weird way (if you ask, he'll stop) but he'll just, like, pat your shoulder or something like that.

If Weirdmageddon 2 happens he is SO finding you and inviting you to his party. You're coming, too. You don't got a choice. Womp womp.

If one of his friends were to eat you, he'd probably be disappointed as all hell, but it really depends on how close you are with him. Besties? He'd kill that monster and resurrect you with the parts left. Just acquaintances? Who are you again?

Would still possess you even after he gets a physical form. (he likes to prank you)

Romantic X reader

Clingy bastard. If your insert is mortal, he'll be by your side 24/7 if Weirdmageddon is happening. Even if your insert ISN'T mortal.

Would be even MORE touchy.

He'd set up boundaries and be clear with his own while probably ignoring yours. (he isn't a great partner)

It's probably a toxic one-sided relationship at first. Bill is NOT a good person at ALL. He always had a goal in mind. He sees his romantic interest of you as a little thing that just ALSO happened.

Probably gets flustered by affection really easily if you're the one showing it.

He won't know much about human affections, so you'll probably have to show him the ropes.

Before you do THAT, though, he'll probably just bite you (with his freaky fucking eyeball mouth thing). Not even as a sexual or possessive thing. He just likes to bite you. It's like an awkward thing he can't control. Get too close and he can feel your warmth? Bite. Bite. BITE. It's not light stuff, though. It's always hard enough to draw blood. Purposeful or not. (It's not on purpose)

He doesn't get JEALOUS, but he does get a little insecure if you start getting infatuated with someone else.

If you're hurt from someone, you BEST know he's overprotective as fuck. Your puny mortal body is pathetic, but if you lose it, he loses you, too.

You aren't aging ever again. You aren't DYING ever again. No. He won't let you die ever. Body is giving out? Here's a new one. Forgetting...? No, he'll plant more memories in your mind. He's too late and you're dead...? No you aren't... You'll always be conscious. Whether your body is rotting around your mind or not.

Sex junk

Sadist. 100% all the way. Not even light things, like slaps. No, if you consent, he will full on break your bones.

He doesn't feel sexual gratification like humans do, so it's more of just something he'll do to either please or displease you. Whichever one, it's almost always about how you feel.

He doesn't have a dick, so you'll be on the receiving end always. Unless you REALLY want to give.

He has a giant eyeball on him. He definitely likes to watch.

Always tops because there isn't much you can do to dominate him. He'll try to let you if you really wanna, but it probably won't be the easiest.

Blood kink. That's it. He thinks it's so pretty on you. Especially if it's yours.

[tcvsfiredemon]

Platonic Narumayo and Romantic Tension

I was originally gonna post this as a twitter thread, but it started getting really long and that toxic sludgepit doesn’t deserve that kind of effort. Get yourself a snack or something, it’s gonna get rambly.

I think people who go out of their way to shut down the possibility that there could be any romantic attraction between Nick and Maya are missing out on a really cool aspect of their platonic relationship.

There’s a lot to be said about the many facets of the Narumayo friendship, from their bonding through shared trauma, to their building a found family with Pearl, to their effortless ability to trade off being the straight man of their comedic duo. But I think a lot of people miss how much of their friendship is informed by the fact that they both kinda want to kiss each other.

First off, Maya is constantly teasing Phoenix, and often in a weirdly flirty way. Just a few examples off the top of my head. She says Max is dreamy with stars on his face and immediately suggests Nick put stars on his face. She acts like a spurned lover when Phoenix is talking to Adrian, specifically in an attempt to get him flustered. She explicitly compares Phoenix rescuing her from being kidnapped to the DeLites’ love story. 

There’s quite a few moments like this throughout the games, and coupled with a lot of Maya’s actions and reactions, I get the sense that we’re supposed to believe that she has a thing for Nick. Maybe that’s just the shipping goggles talking, but it really does feel like the intended subtext. I mean, look at that what she instinctively drew when she was in 

(You’re probably wondering when the platonic part comes in. We’ll get there.)

But even if Maya does have a crush on Phoenix, does he return it? Obviously she’s very important to him, but is that really as a romantic interest? We often see him get flustered or stunned into silence whenever people assume he and Maya are dating(which happens a lot), but I feel like that can easily just be read as him being uncomfortable with people assuming he’s in a relationship with his assistant.

In general, Phoenix’s feelings for Maya are fairly ambiguous and probably not something that he’s thought through too much himself. That is, of course, until the waitress scene. That scene, in my opinion, is the single hardest thing to justify if you’re trying to deny any romantic tension within Narumayo. I’ve seen people say that it’s just Phoenix giving a compliment to his best friend/sister figure, but is that really the tone that’s being conveyed there? 

That initial comment on her voice. The pregnant pause when he sees her. The weird pick-up line that probably just came out of his mouth without any thought. That’s not the actions of a guy innocently complimenting his friend, that’s the reaction of a guy who just realized that he finds his friend hot. I’d argue that the case can’t even proceed the way it does unless Phoenix thinks Maya is attractive, because that’s what gives him the idea to try to get her to seduce information out of Kudo.

So between Maya and Phoenix we have two best friends with a lot of chemistry who are probably into each other, and whose friends definitely think are already togeyhet, but we never actually see them take that step into romance. And you know what? It fucking works!

(See, told you we’d get into the platonic stuff eventually.)

One of my favorite movies of all time is When Harry Met Sally, and while the titular couple does get together in the end, most of the film is about the two of them navigating being best friends while obviously having romantic feelings for each other. It’s a beautiful story of these two people building a wonderful platonic relationship and then very nearly ruining it when they try to turn it romantic. 

That’s the dynamic I see between Phoenix and Maya. They love each other and are probably in love with each other, but they insist on keeping things strictly platonic because to change that could mean to destroy what they’ve spent years building up. It’s an underlying tension that underscores a lot of their actions.

It’s the dynamic that the two of them still have almost a decade later in SoJ, where they find immense comfort just being in each other’s presence, investigating cases like old times. And no matter how much Phoenix gawks at Maya like a sun fish, no matter how many times Maya teases Nick while they’re investigating a wedding-based case, no matter how much they may or may not want to kiss, they’re so happy just to be friends.

(Not that I’d be mad if they did end up kissing…)

Obviously there’s nothing wrong at all with seeing Narumayo as siblings or as purely platonic friends who would never in their wildest dreams be romantically interested in each other, but I do feel like something is lost in that interpretation. 

Like, I’m not the biggest fan of romantic Narumitsu, but I don’t think you can truly appreciate their friendship while ignoring that those guys have a weird pseudo-romantic tension going on. Without it they’re just two dudes who used to be friends and don’t have a whole lot of chemistry but would still for some reason die for each other. Once you acknowledge that “oh, they’re kinda in love, aren’t they” it all makes perfect sense.

I don’t think platonic Narumayo exactly falls apart if you ignore their romantic tension. They still have all that other stuff I talked about, but their relationship loses a lot of richness if it’s reduced to just “besties” or “siblings”. Even the games themselves took a little time to explore the potential romantic tension between Phoenix and Maya, and I think that’s been pretty instrumental in making them one of the coolest male/female friendships this side of When Harry Met Sally.

[beatrice-otter]

I'm so confused by your perspectives. So if you joke about right wing politics you could potentially normalize it to yourself or to others so just don't talk about it, but you can't do that with what you read on ao3, it's "just fiction." Make it make sense

One of my problems with antis who want to censor stuff is that having to fight back against censorship means it's hard to talk about the nuances of what a person chooses to read or say or write or watch, without it being twisted into "and that's why nobody should be allowed to do it and everyone who wants to is a pedophile so we should control what people are allowed to say and read!" So here's some nuance.

All words matter and affect the people who read and say them.

How they matter and how much they matter varies dramatically from person to person, and in any individual case you can't tell what that impact is going to be or control it.

The things that have the most impact are pretty much always going to be the things with a large driving force of the dominant culture behind them, or a complete social circle that you can be absorbed into advocating for those things both in fiction and in real life. In other words, while the things you read and say affect you, the people around you affect you a lot more.

"I said this" is much more effective at training your brain than "I read this."

"Pay attention to how you joke about things that our society counts as normal" is very different from "nobody should ever be able to read/write about certain topics."

Here's an example. When Jaws came out, people were terrified of sharks. The amount of shark killings--sharks killed by human beings--skyrocketed, and remained high for years. People saw a movie about a scary shark, and generalized it to "all sharks are bad and should be killed." Which was broadly in line with the message of the film. But note that it didn't result in a similar backlash about the other message of the film, the ways in which people are endangered by politicians and businessmen who care more about profits than people's lives. Why? Because "sharks are bad and dangerous" was already part of the larger culture, and "politicians and businessmen endanger people" had a lot of cultural weight both for and against, so there were cultural forces preventing people from taking that aspect too far.

Here's another example. Finding Nemo also had a huge impact in real life, but in that case the impact was inspiring people to do the opposite of the message of the movie. The message of the movie is clear: keeping fish in aquariums is cruel and evil, and something only a villain would do. But a lot of people saw that movie, went "wow, tropical fish are cool!" and completely ignored the message and went out to buy an aquarium with tropical fish in it. There was a huge spike in pet fish sales. Why? Because keeping fish in aquariums is a normal thing to do, that a lot of people find interesting, and there is no widespread cultural idea that keeping fish is bad, and so most people who watched the movie did not notice the messaging, and if they did notice it, they shrugged and ignored it because it didn't fit with the way they saw the world.

When we talk about problematic things in fanfiction, we are not (by and large) talking about things that our culture has normalized. Like incest or the Hydra Trash Party. You could read three incest fics a day for the rest of your life, and write one a week, and unless you had real-life friends who actively talked about how incest was good, you would be vanishingly unlikely to change your opinion about it.

When we write and read fiction (whether fanfic or not) about things like incest, it's very rarely about "incest is good, actually!" It's usually either "wow, incest is a fun kink to imagine in a safe space where there's no chance of it happening in reality" or "this is a thing that happens in real life, and it's devastating and awful, so let's explore that." Or even just "wouldn't it be fucked up if ..." The human brain is complicated. It's common to have fantasies about things that you absolutely would NOT want in real life. Fiction exists partly because it's a safe space to explore those things. Yes, that has an impact on the person reading it and the person writing it ... but that impact is usually catharsis or getting off or something, and not inspiring you to be more approving of that in real life.

Even if you're reading it on a fairly surface level and not engaging with the themes or stuff like that, it's still usually long and complex enough that the act of reading it requires at least a little bit of thought and nuance. It takes time. There's a lot there to notice, and the things that stick out to you--the things that affect you--might be totally different than what someone else might expect. You can't predict how any given individual will react or what they're going to take away from it.

Jokes, on the other hand, tend to be short and pointed. There doesn't tend to be much nuance. Either you find it funny, or you don't, and if you find it funny you're a lot more likely to have your hindbrain normalize it, because it is shorter and simpler.

What you say impacts how you think much more than what you read does. There's a reason that when people try to brainwash prisoners of war or whatever, they don't require them to read propaganda, they require them to write and say it. Because the brain is not good at compartmentalizing "I said X" from "I believe X." You may know on an intellectual level that X is wrong, but if you are saying it, and also hearing it from the people and culture around you, your gut is likely to accept X as true.

Right-wing jokes have a lot of cultural weight to them in real life, and a lot of people genuinely believe that they are true. If anything is going to slip through your defenses and affect you, an "ironic" right-wing joke is much more likely to do so than a Hydra Trash Party story on AO3.

Note that I am saying "hey watch out, this is a thing," and not "people shouldn't be allowed to do it" or "people who do this are secretly all fascists deep down."

I'm not calling for censorship, or harassment. I'm asking people to be wary of a larger trend in our culture and letting them do with it what they will.

[stormikins]

Mass Effect: Failed Opportunities.

An informal rant/essay about my opinions and thoughts (and ideas/suggestions) about the choices made in Mass Effect Three. This is all because of this one post by mass-effect-anonymous, and my friend (@xoshepard) giving me a compliment about my Shepard came back wrong headcanons. So. I’m fueled by validation and rage. A summary of the mentioned post is anonymous regrets that BioWare didn't explore the implications of Shepard dying and coming back and the fact that Liara helped Cerberus in doing so.

Disclaimer: I am a hater in this. I am. No doubt about it. If you like the story and think it’s great and nothing is wrong with it— then I am so happy for you. Truly. I wish I was the same. So, this post might not be for you. Also, this is a rant, and I try to keep it sensible so apologies if it’s not.

Word Count: 3k

TLDR: BioWare flip flops between decisions and choices and never truly settles, disregards choices already made, and leaves players (AND THEIR MOTHERS!) wanting while eviscerating character personalities. Consistency is not in BioWare’s vocabulary. Or dictionary. Or thesaurus.

One of the things that I dislike the most about BioWare's choices regarding this matter is that Shepard starts having these crisis thoughts/questions about if their body is theirs or not, etc. not only in the third game, but at the end of it. The player is literally doing the mission that marks the point of no return in the end, the last of two until the game is finished, and now Shepard is voicing these thoughts. Roughly sixty-ish hours since the beginning of me2 if the player is a completionist. (that’s in game time, not to mention how much more time for real life but I digress). This isn’t a plot hole, it’s a speed bump the player trips over and then the game expects us to get back up and get going while asking why our nose is bleeding. Fuck you BioWare.

Now, one could construe this into being part of Shepard's character; squashing down all these conflicting and worrying thoughts to focus on their mission, bc they are a soldier. They literally don't have time for this. But now they're physically confronted with their reconstruction post-awakening haze and/or denial about it all bc Cerberus could be them lying to Shepard bc of manipulation. All right. If that is supposed to be the implication, Shepard putting their mental focus on their mission, why didn't Shepard have this crisis when they were in lock-up for six months, aka where they literally only have time to think?

James having a throwaway comment to Shepard, or another crew member (bc they talk to each other now between missions!), about how he's worried about them, about how Shepard had a freak out some point in lock down, the level of 'freak out' does not need to be expanded upon. Hell, James can just say maybe they passed the time asking each other philosophical questions, maybe about consent and choices (which would tie into James’ past!) and bodily autonomy. It could help lend more weight with Shepard posing these questions during the Cerberus HQ bc these thoughts are still plaguing Shepard. Shepard dies—again—without getting closure— again. This would fall into the cycle theme that the games have.

But, like always, Bioware fails to capitalize on opportunity.

Now. The Citadel DLC. sighs Shepard's repeated variations of "don't want to talk about it" it being the clone and everything else that's happening in the DLC, lends more to the theory of Shepard's supposed to be repressing this all. But the counter point about Shepard having their crisis in lock-up still stands.

What could have been interesting is if Shepard had these identity issues in 2 and potentially in three. Given that the Citadel DLC ends with the clone always dying canonically, it can be a pivotal moment for Shepard to realize that they are who they are, different than their me1 counterpart or not (it also would be cool if characters mentioned if the player was choosing choices that an imported me1 Shepard normally would not have) and to have a clarity moment that they are Shepard. The clone and these logs could have provided a clean tying of loose ends of Shepard having identity issues instead of the teammates saying two lines about how they know that Shepard is Shepard and Shepard simply... moving on because you do all this in the middle of a base attack. The player's mind is already set on defeating Cerberus (finally) and getting revenge, on being so close to the end of the game! It's also OPTIONAL. Yes, the player is automatically entered into the terminal, but the choice to leave without seeing what's on the logs is immediately available.

Another thing the previous post went into was Liara's involvement. Her part in Shepard's reconstruction is not explored in the game. The player never learns about how Liara helped, just that she did and that she lost Feron because of it all to the Shadow Broker. I will not go into the comics, because 1. I have not read them and 2. If developers must depend on supplemental media to explain key plot points, they are in fact doing it wrong (this is a conversation for another time).

I would not be as bitter about Liara's involvement if the game treated it better. The player has to complete two quests to unlock the dialogue of Liara telling Shepard that she gave their body to Cerberus. Which, I will give them, it’s normally to not want to tell the person who you gave their dead body over to terrorists. Shepard’s renegade dialogue to Liara apologizing about giving their body over is as follows, “all this time, it wasn’t your sources. You knowingly gave me over to Cerberus. You did this to me!” SHEPARD DOESN’T SAY ANYTHING ELSE. JUST SITS BACK DOWN AND THE RENEGADE RESPONSE TO HER SECOND APOLOGY IS TO SAY, “Let me know if you need any more help,” AND YOU LEAVE. WHY IS THIS THE ONLY TIME SHEPARD ACKNOWLEDGES THIS. wow. AND WHY IS IT LIKE THIS? ITS OPTIONAL. I— Again, this could tie into Shepard bottling up feelings and acknowledging them in Me3, could show Shepard as an actual person if the game lets us choose to be mean or turn her off but alas, the player cannot because the game likes ruining Shepard’s character (which I’ll save that for later) and doesn’t treat the games like RPGs.  

One could say that Liara would go to any lengths for those she loves, whether the player romanced her or not, but in the first game, we have no indication that she is willing to go this far. I have a belief that nothing is 'out of character' if the circumstances are right. Now, these circumstances are right: two important figures in Liara's life die (Shepard and her mother), Liara's only connection to her theories on the extinction of the reapers dies as well, the threat of the Reapers, and all the traumatic experiences she had during me1 and then the destruction of the Normandy all collide together to make it realistic that Liara wouldn't be able to let Shepard go. There is one thing, though, is that this is all boiled down into “I couldn't let you go” and the game doesn't show it. Doesn’t show Liara's descent down into this rabbit hole, doesn't show the switch getting flipped of her turning much more ruthless compared to her me1 characterization.

She does show ruthlessness in some regards in me1, willing to kill her mother no matter their relationship. But out of all the SR1 cast, she is one of the most paragon characters. The game does not show the shift into Liara's characterization. No commentary from Me1 companions about how Liara suddenly shut them out, or from Feron talking about the things Liara was willing to do to get Shepard. No comments from Miranda and Jacob who I do know were part of the retrieval mission about how Liara acted. Liara is just immediately introduced with quoting her mother’s threats. WHICH IS SO INTERESTING! Again—AGAIN—the game goes nowhere with this. We get optional dialogue from Aethyta about the Matriarch’s being concerned about her but that is optional, and only if the player talked to her in Me2 does she show up in Me3 and deliver said dialogue. Liara herself never confronts this. Even when SHE TALKS ABOUT HER MOTHER. LISTEN— LIARA COULD HAVE TURNED INTO A SCIENTIST THAT WOULD DO ANYTHING FOR HER RESEARCH. TO PROVE HERSELF RIGHT BECAUSE SHE IS, SHE KNOWS IT AND SHE’LL DO ANYTHING LIKE BRINGING SOMEONE’S DEAD BODY TO A TERRORIST ORGANIZATION TO RESSURECT AND YET—

Garrus, on the other hand, gets his new characterization explained. In me1 he already tends to be reckless, ruthless, and selfish. It is no surprise that when Shepard died and the Council buried the truth, he went vigilante. The game shows his new bleak outlook on life bc we find him fighting for his life in a base full of dead bodies and then he explains he got betrayed. We deal with his character arc. We do not deal with Liara’s.

One could argue that could go and show how Shepard wakes up two years in the future and everything is different and confusing. Which I will agree with. If it was purposeful. And I don’t think it is, personally.

She doesn’t stay this new ruthless way. I am not saying she can’t be more than one-dimensional; I like that she can be soft with Shepard and the other companions. But all of a sudden, she, the character whose introduction in Me3 is her popping a singularity and gunning down two Cerberus goons with a cold look on her face, “can’t be that callous” about not focusing on the death numbers in the middle of a war zone because “that’s my home down there”. A home she rarely talks about, and she’s also been in numerous war zones just as bad as this. Liara, who spent more time in digs or collecting intel than with people, feels a sudden connection with Thessia.

I would like Liara a lot more if they didn’t eviscerate her character, thank you. Don’t take this the wrong way, I love her, I think she’s great. She just has the potential to be so much more.

Like—

Mass Effect for some reason, tries not to be an RPG. They don't give the players a proper choice/dialogue to allow Shepard to be mad at Liara about what she did. Or to stay mad. (I am not going to get into the debate of whether being mad at Liara should be a renegade option or paragon). It would make sense for someone to get pissed at the person who gave their dead body over to scientists to reanimate, but also terrorist scientists. The same terrorists that Shepard potentially fought in Me1 and also potentially discovered were behind the whole sale slaughter of their entire platoon and the torture of the only other survivor of the incident.

(I can’t remember if Shepard ever mentions Akuze to Cerberus. Funny, isn’t it. How the games like to take away Shepard’s agency but not in any compelling way.) 

Besides, simply not choosing paragon options, it’s never mentioned again what Liara did to Shepard, which makes sense if Shepard accepted Liara’s apology. But what if Shepard, and the player, doesn’t? Liara’s forced on the player in Me3 as Shepard potential confidant, showing up repeatedly to Shepard’s cabin to move the plot forward, give Shepard missions/updates. Yes, the player can refuse to get personal with her which I do appreciate it. Like I said, Liara’s actions never get brought up in any meaningful way to help Shepard on a character journey. If they don’t want to let characters make decisions about who Shepard is, they should give them a personality. But they don’t.

Another failed opportunity about Shepard’s character is when the games don’t get into what Shepard is like post-resurrection. The game seems to be in the middle ground of making Shepard different but not still human, but in actuality, they can, in the words of Hannah Montana, have “the best of both worlds”.

Me2 shows how Shepard is different now. “I’ve noticed a few upgrades,” Shepard states when talking to the Illusive Man on Minute Man station. Shepard can have multiple hard-hitting drinks in a row along with Ryncol in Dark Star, Zakera Ward. A poison tailored for humans served by a batarian bartender in the lower segment of Afterlife only knocks Shepard out, not killing them like it does to every human before.

That is how far the game will go in showing how different Shepard is, not counting renegade scarring. Which is a waste.

Shepard is The Protagonist. The main character. They have done the actual impossible. They are the Sole Survivor, the Hero of Elysium, the Butcher of Torfan, Savior of the Citadel, repeller of Geth, Collector, and Reaper armies and a host of other incredible achievements. They are a prophet, the damned, a modern-day Cassandra. The tip of the Spear, the Diplomat, the Soldier. Coats in the FOB on Earth says that it means something to the soldiers to see Shepard with them. They are “a tool, an agent with a singular purpose,” TIM calls them. (And a Karen ‘accuse her of classism’).

And yet, when Shepard gets revived—the most impossible of all things (and yes, it’s not like they had anything to do with it, it was Miranda and her team, but the Lazarus project only had one subject)—they are not made further into something larger than life. Something Other. Something that sets them out from the others. Because they’re Commander Fucking Shepard.

They literally have a vision of a dying race in their head that propels them to stop the Reapers. Me1 does a great job of playing with it. The player sees it once in Me2 and Me3, a side mission (Blue Suns: Archaeological Site) and after retrieving Javik, respectively.

Mass effect is all about cycles. The Reaper’s, Saren/Tim parallels, etc. What could have been interesting was instead of the reoccurring dream we have about a child that gets his emotional impact tarnished because of said dream and the star-child, the game does a mesh of the vision, prothean civilization in ruin, and the ruins we see of current civilizations from the missions Shepard goes on. Keep the oily shadows that whisper quotes from our dead teammates, but also have their voices coming from long dead Protheans pleading with Shepard to stop the Reapers, to save them.

Shepard can’t get any escape from the war, from the Reapers in their sleeping nor waking hours.

The game not making Shepard Other and going in the opposite direction—that despite all these upgrades Shepard is still human—would be fine if it was done better. A good stereotype of “I’m only human” is when a character fails. Shepard fails in Me3 most prominently on Thessia. I’m all for having characters fail but only when it’s done not so obnoxiously.

It’s a terrible fight. It is. Kai Leng hides behind a gunship that Shepard took down at least three separate times in Me2. Two of these instances are non-optional: Garrus and Samara’s recruitment and Kasumi’s loyalty mission is optional. So, Shepard—Commander Shepard who literally destroyed a proto-Reaper—can’t destroy a gunship. It’s insulting how they ruin Shepard’s character in three.

In the end cutscene, Shepard clearly hears and registers that Kai Leng orders the gunship to fire on the supports of the structure and… runs further into the building. One could argue Shepard was trying to get the Prothean VI for the catalyst, but Liara is shown scanning it with her omni-tool. What did she do, if not copy it? Why would she not? Why wouldn’t Shepard? They’re in the middle of a war zone, with enemies that were just right outside the door. Why stop for a chat here and now? (I know why, the plot demands it and lore dumping— lore that contradicts the lore dump by Vigil in Me1 so I’m even more inclined to not like these proceedings).

Kai Leng is Shepard’s nemesis in Me3 (and I’m forever mad that he is) and he’s supposed to be badass and edgy and able to go toe-to-toe with Shepard. Yet the game shows he can’t. He can’t reach his target because a terminally ill drell stopped him, or he didn’t notice Bau being cloaked in front of the Salarian councilor. (I can also go into how stupid this scene is with BOTH Thane and Bau).

He gets one over Shepard with the C-Sec sky car chase but that doubles back to BioWare ruining Shepard’s character by making them an idiot. Why not hit the brakes? Why not do a couple barrel rolls? Why fire through what should be bullet proof glass because it’s a C-Sec sky car?

Kai Leng can’t go toe-to-toe with Shepard unless Shepard gets dumbed down into an idiot and isn’t someone who reached not only Commander rank but also became the first human Spectre. HELLO!?

So, Shepard failing and still being human and fallible doesn’t hit because they execute it poorly via Kai Leng and his stupid plot armor.

Who would be Shepard’s nemesis if not Kai Leng? HARBINGER. YOU KNOW THE REAPER THAT TAUNTED SHEPARD IN ME2? THE VERY FIRST REAPER MADE? THE REAPER THAT WE ONLY SEE—NOT TALK TO—SEE IN THE LAST HOUR OF THE GAME? THAT GUY. (matter of fact, throw in some of Harby’s arrogant lines about Shepard not being able to stop the Reapers in the alternative dream.) Harbinger should have possessed troops like he did in Me2 in the major Reaper battles. Earth. Menae. Thessia. He should have showed up somewhere, boasting about how they’re darkening the sky of every world. YES THAT’S A SOVEREIGN CALL BACK CYCLES! SHEPARD’S VISION IS COMING TRUE RIGHT BEFORE THEIR EYES AND HE’S NOT BRAGGING!? I THINK THE FUCK NOT! If you’re gonna make the Reapers so obsessed with Shepard as shown in Me2 with Harbinger’s comments and making a human looking Reaper, KEEP THE OBSESSION FOR THE LOVE OF GOD! I hate that the Reapers are obsessed with Shepard, Reapers who are above organics, have no weaknesses etc. and the entirety of Sovereign’s brilliant Virmire speech, because it’s not CARRIED OVER!

The enemies should have primarily been the Reapers from the start, and Cerberus the splinter group trying to sabotage the player. Make them smaller. Keep them kidnapping people for troops and biotic tests and lying about Sanctuary being a sanctuary and not run by Cerberus. Continuously have them send assassins—plural! Phantoms and nemesis—after Shepard with Kai Leng at the head of them. Even better if a strike group of baddies show up randomly during missions and watch out! Now Shepard has to deal with them as they fight the Reapers—in the same mission— because Cerberus wants to stop Shepard from killing the Reapers so they could control them and secure human dominance. Kai Leng is kept away from his target because they’re also fighting Shepard where Reapers are. Have them locked into stalemates until the environment getting destroyed literally forces them apart. Have them actually be equal adversaries.

Cerberus is introduced to be a mere group Shepard took out in Me1. They’re not all gone in Me2 surprise! Okay that’s fine and yet they not only sunk so many resources into Shepard and had so many cells gone rogue but they’re able to stage a coup on the Citadel! Pardon?? “But our resources are not unlimited, rebuilding you was a significant investment. And a significant risk,” Miranda tells Shepard in Me2. Cerberus kidnapping people on Benning would make sense if they’re scrambling for troops other than the relying on Sanctuary. (EVEN IN ME3 THERE ARE ‘ROGUE FACTIONS’— still a common occurrence for them. It’s never explained if Cerberus is lying about Benning or not). If they have these many rogue cells, again, how can they manage all they do in Me3? Especially if scientists are leaving Cerberus as well, aka the Ex-Cerberus Scientist mission Traynor gives you where you meet up with Jacob.

Yet, the player talks more to the Illusive Man than Harbinger in Me3, the leader of the Reapers, and we confront TIM at the end of the game, the most pivotal moment. The moment which people have sunk countless hours into, and we get a power hungry and indoctrinated TIM to… talk into shooting himself or firing a single bullet at him. There is no physical fight between the two. The conversation is similar to Saren’s and again, cycles are a theme, so why can’t we get a Reaper!TIM fight? The player, and Shepard, deserve the choice to fuck him up. This is a military game after all, they’re supposed to be encouraging our aggressive nature.

They ruin TIM but also Shepard.

Shepard never grows and changes like the characters around them, and their resurrection could have—should have—played a part in that. If they’re supposed to remain the same, be a tool for the narrative, make them it. Lean into that. The player chooses options. What would be an interesting mechanic is to make it a struggle for a certain background to get a certain morality. Have Shepard be stating doubts about who they are and if the player is contradicting a stereotypical background (Butcher trying to be paragon, a Hero trying to be renegade), they meet the camera—the players eyes—as they explain their inner turmoil. Make Shepard feel like the tool they are, like they’re not in control of their actions. A renegade overcoming it all and being a paragon hero, or a fall from grace paragon that brings the galaxy down with them. A renegade trapped in a cycle of violence (CYCLE) who can only see the world down the barrel of a gun, or a paragon who continuously chooses kindness. MAKE IT MEAN SOMETHING!

I think I’m done. So.

In conclusion, my love and passion for this game transitions into rage because of seeing possibilities squashed like a bug under a boot. To borrow Star War’s phrase: Mass Effect could be so good if it was good. 

[lucy-dulap]

Lucy's opinion on all the kings and vice versa

(Going back to my roots with this one)

Lucy: Satan is a very... interesting character. He is quick to anger so I don't like him that much. The crunch of his teeth is a trigger at this point. I could do with a little less Satan in my life.

Satan: I have no idea how Solomon made such a whimp. They're adorable, I wish they would stop flinching everytime I look at them.

Lucy: Mammon is my sugar daddy. I give him praise and kiss his ass and he gives me money, it is a very fair trade. Hm? Of course he knows that's our relationship dynamic, how could he not?

Mammon: And this is the plan I have for their wedding suit or dress, this will be our cake and this is the ring design I came up with. They can still date Gamigin, but I'm clearly their future husband.

Lucy: Leviathan... no comment. I value my throat more than my desire to call him what he is.

Leviathan: They're an ungrateful brat with absolutely no decency! All they ever do is whinge and cry, they are just the worst! And don't get me started on that Gamigin guy. How dare he kiss my child! He doesn't deserve them and I'll make sure he pays for touching someone else's property.

Lucy: I hate Beelzebub. Whenever he's around he smokes and I hate ciggeret smoke. He's also so sexual and he keeps groping me. At least Mammon pays me money to touch my ass, Beelzebub looks like he's after my V card and nothing else.

Beelzebub: Who? Oh yeah the kid. They're cool, I guess. Nothing against them. They're a bit boring though.

Lucy: mmmmmm Asmodeus... man is making me question my asexuality

Asmodeus: I'm holding my opinion until that heritage test comes back. For the record, I would not fuck my children. Anyone else though? Especially my ex's mistake? Absolutely. I have some unfinished business with Solomon anyways.

Lucy: I'm not sure Belphegor is alive. He snored once when I was close to him and I swear I almost had a heart attack on the spot.

*Belphegor could not be found to respond to this interview question*

Lucy: Lucifer is perfect, I love him with all my life, since I was 11 I started worshiping Lucifer and it seems like it has payed off. Even now I pray to him, I wish he would sit on me, use me as a chair, or a footrest, anything, Lucifer if you're watching this let me ri-

Lucifer: They're a good kid. I'm glad Gamigin is making friends outside of Paradise Lost.

[birdmitosis]

Are you still dining the ask game? If you are what are your thoughts on the pristine blade

[ask game here]

LOL okay I will definitely do this one. This is a very cool ask actually and I am so excited to share my thoughts on the pristine blade itself!

First impression

This is just our implement. We had to have a weapon of some sort available to us to be able to slay the Princess, right? Mostly I just kinda dismissed the blade as a storytelling convention and that's about it.

Impression now

Much more intrigued, honestly! The pristine blade is one of the only parts of the Construct besides us, the Princess, the Narrator in our head, and the environment. It is almost always there (besides in The Wraith, interestingly enough) and it is always "pristine" -- even in the dirt or covered in blood. Is it a piece of us? A piece of the Princess? A piece that came from the messy tear that separated us? And does it have any connection to the Princess's chains -- the only other part of the Construct besides those things? What does its being "pristine" signify? There is definitely something about this blade...

Favorite moment

When you hold it the "cool" way by default if you take the blade in The Apotheosis. That combined with the swell of epic music and us facing down a Biblically Accurate Princess large enough to have her own gravitational pull just made me cheer out loud when I first saw it!

Idea for a story

This one's a bit harder. I haven't had any real ideas up to now, except to explore in various fic how the voices might choose to arm themselves post-Construct, who would continue to choose blades, or if they managed to have the blade when they left who would most often have it (or be allowed to)...

I could also, though, see a fun fic coming from the idea of "what if the blade was available in The Wraith?" Or maybe what if it wasn't available at all in The Den or The Thorn?

Unpopular opinion

IDK if this is super unpopular, but I think it is even more interesting and fucked up and badass of her if you go the route of screwing up so bad with Thorn that she swallows the blade whole. If nothing else, it really shows how much of Witch is still in her, and I love that!

Favorite relationship

I can't narrow it down to just one!

I love the relationship Cold has with the blade as almost an extension of himself, as both being weapons. I love Contrarian's dedication (until the Stranger ending) to throwing it out the window and also his insistence to hold it the other way that comes back in The Apotheosis even though he's not there! I love Hunted's relationship to the "steel claw." I love Paranoid's moment of "steel can't lie to us," and how she's perfectly willing to use it to slit our own throat despite desperately not wanting to die before. I love Skeptic refusing to let you not take the blade and being willing and able to stop your heart if you don't use it in the leadup to The Grey!

I also love Adversary wanting us to stab her with it. How Damsel is perfectly willing to let you chop bits of her off with it (how metaphorical), and accepts her death if you slay her with it with tears in her eyes, and has it firmly in her heart as the Burned Grey, and if you reach for it she gently holds your hand there. How Prisoner uses it to cut off her own head. Everything about Witch and Thorn's relationship to it, whether things go well or terribly. How in The Wraith it just disappears entirely, for the only time in the entire game!

And I love how desperately the Narrator clings to it, needs it to be there. And I love the relationship the Princess (Harsh, Soft, or Stranger) in Shifty's heart has with it; her line that since you chose to take the blade, it has to be used, just gets me right in the heart.

I guess if I had to chose, out of those three... "categories" I suppose? I'd choose Skeptic, Damsel -> Burned Grey, and Shifty's Heart.

Favorite headcanon

I mean, it's not confirmed, but I think I like the idea that the pristine blade and the Princess's chains are similar things. Only you can use the pristine blade to attack with, though the Princess can use it against herself (Prisoner and Thorn most obviously), she never stabs you with it even when she winds up with a blade of her own; you have very little effect over the chains, only being able to be trapped in them in The Prisoner, while Prisoner can attack you with them, several of the vessels can free themselves from them, and the ones you free from them plant the idea in your head first (Damsel, Tower). The chains, like the blade, are always in the same place until certain Chapter IIIs, where sometimes they disappear.

The pristine blade is tied to the Long Quiet in some way, may be a part of him, while the chains are tied to the Shifting Mound in some way. Again, not confirmed, but I really like the idea.

ETA: @salty-an-disco pointed out a thing that makes EVEN MORE sense and is super cool: the idea that the pristine blade is actually a piece of the Shifting Mound (a piece of death that you can use to kill with), while the chains are a piece of the Long Quiet (stagnancy trying to trap her)! So the pristine blade is actually tied to the Shifting Mound as a part of her, while the chains are tied to the Long Quiet likewise.

Again, not confirmed, but this idea rocks so much that I am immediately adopting it forever.

[zai-doodles]

Yeah!! Please rank the spirit dresses!

LETS GOOOOOOO

ok ok ill try to not ramble too much but this will def be long lol

im not perfect by any means and these r just my opinions so idk don't kill me ig, if u disagree u can say that but be polite

10. OK so in LAST PLACE WE HAVE

CAPRICORN!

ok put down ur pitch forks and let me talk-

its not a BAD design aesthetically or in concept, I've seen ppl say its kinda leaning into a like, spy vibe or something and I really like the sunglasses and horns!

BUT capricorn never read as a spy to me?? maybe its just me but he always came off as more of a butler parody especially w the tailcoat he gets in this screenshot

i think both capricorn and the stardress suffer from not having a very visually distinct concept so when put together its barely feels like they match at all, its its v clear that putting lucy in a skimpy dress took priority over making a cool design that connected to the story

i dont even love my redesign for this dress anymore bc I feel like I just need to redo Capricorn first to give him a stronger concept then deal w the dress later

OK

9.

AQUARIUS

this is blasphemy i know but PLEASE HEAR ME OUT

this one is way more personal preferance so if u disagree that's so chill there's just too many things w this dress that bother me

I hate the hair, i really do like grown women w pigtails is already a pet peeve of mine bc its so male gazy to me but combining that with the bikini top and super short skirt just annoys me

and let me say again THERES NOTHING WRONG WITH LIKING THIS but in the larger context of this being the AQUARIUS dress it just doesn't read like her at all!! Sure she has a bikini but she also has v ling hair!

where capricorn suffers from too little visual concept aquarius has so much of it!! The gold to me reads v fancy and royalty esque which makes sense for her personality, just changing the hair to something more like what aquarius has would do wonders I feel like

plus i hate the green-

my first redesign ever was this dress bc it annoyed me soooo much

ANYWAY-

8.

VIRGO

this fit is fine, just boring

but virgos design is also boring and the one interesting thing, her chains, NOT being part of the star dress or alluded to makes me angry

also pigtails so it loses points

NEXT

7.

ARIES

again its fine but its boring, mainly bc aries' design is also boring so-

idk i wish they went more bo peep with it cuz I feel like that could have been cute

also more fucking pigtails-

6.

TAURUS

if any fit deserved to have horns its this one TAURUS IS A BULL-

anyway this fits is also fine but damn they could have gone so much harder w the cowgirl thing

i do still stand by my redesign for this stardress bc I think it fits canon without redoing taurus

she should have a nose ring its just facts-

5.

GEMINI

love the concept and idea! kinda meh execution

its fine ig but its also like gemini don't look anything like this? which makes this another one were I feel ud have to rework gemini to give them more visual cues u could take

the headdress specfically confuses me since the wiki says its a Kokoshnik but after looking at the wiki for that I found nothing in the history that makes that make sense for this fit?? like concept wise??

its only so high up bc i respect that they did something different and creative with this dress and the way they split the colors on the dress itself is cute, just wish they went more magician or even jester w it

the only pigtails im kinda ok w bc symmetry

(when i say more magician i did it this way:

4.

SCORPIO

its cute, i wish the tail was bigger and I see v little reason for the fit to be skin tight when scorpio himself literally has a half skirt thing going on

i still like this so here, as u can see I liked the idea with the hair and headband combo I just wish they had pushed it further

3.

SAGITTARIUS

again, cool concept, weird execution?

this one is the only one i feel that THRIVES from not taking any visual cues from the spirit bc honestly his design just sucks I'm sorry ik its supposed to be funny but its just stupid to me idk

however even if i like thaty they did something different AND gave her the bow and arrow, it annoys me still that nothing about the fit reads equestrian or archery? there's SO MANY historical fits they could have used as inspo for this and they just chose not to and that's lazy to me idk

also also i hate that for a while bc of the way the manga was colored it looked like she was fully just wearing underwear bc of the white fabric with nothing on her thighs like that's dumb he's a horse u WANT something there to protect that area when riding

2.

LEO

its cute, it matched loke design AND personality wise, wish there were more lion elements but overall v cute

CANCER

i already talked abt my thoughts on this dress here so yeits just good AND the pigtails r ok bc they r meant to mimic cancers silhouette which I really like

summary:

[sparklepirate]

Alright, final thoughts on Inheritance.

;-;

Eragon continues to be the guy of all time. I love him. He really displayed a maturity in this book that I think supersedes anything we've seen of him in all the previous books, and just like... His strength really is that he is compassionate and thoughtful towards everyone. Even Murtagh, now, too. He had the realization of how close he was to sharing his fate, sought to understand him, and that was ultimately what led him to realizing his true name had changed, tearing down Galbatorix's wards, etc etc. I don't know that I could properly articulate everything about him here, but Eragon definitely became the hero he needed to be by the end of the series, 100%. He is the only person who could've possibly thought of the final piece of magic to defeat Galbatorix. Even the dreams of starlings are equal to the worries of a king. Ahhh, it's so good. ❤️ I'm so proud of him.

On the other hand, Barst was some bullshit. Bro. Like, on the one hand, it was a very good climactic battle for Roran to participate in, and his triumph was the perfect culmination of his character- cunning in battle, cunning in strategy, the intelligence and charisma to sway everyone around him into cooperating and working together, sheer determination so intensely strong that he was able to crush and Eldunarí with his bare hands. His role was perfect! But Barst as a villain was kinda... Well, first of all, he came completely the fuck out of nowhere. He wasn't mentioned at all until they were already on their way to Uru'baen, and then he was only MENTIONED. They didn't hype him up enough before the actual battle in my opinion. And ONE human and one Eldunarí being enough to beat the QUEEN OF THE ELVES in hand to hand combat...? I mean, I guess that could work but... Ehhh... I dunno. It kind of felt like an excuse for Islanzadí to die, and Roran to triumph more than anything. It was cool, but it was probably the weakest part of the plot in my opinion.

That said though I think it's pretty safe to say this was my favorite book of the series. I'm having trouble recalling all the iconic shit (I took a pretty long break from reading about halfway through the book) but there was soooo much cool stuff in here. The Nasuada being kidnapped and being helped by Murtagh arc is GOLD, Vroengard was amazing, and all the battles were SO well written??? I need to study these books more closely just to learn how to write compelling fight scenes. Honestly, it's gripping stuff. I was on the edge of my seat, despite knowing how everything turns out.

Nasuada is amazing, Arya is amazing, Saphira is amazing, Roran is amazing, MURTAGH is amazing... I think I already liked basically every character in this series going in, but I somehow like them even more now that I've read it again. Everyone is so good, and interesting, and I want to be everyone's friend. I think the only character I liked less this go around was Orrin (sorry to my Orrin stan friend out there). That said, though, I don't dislike him, I think I just went from positive to neutral about him.

Orrin honestly just didn't get nearly as much screen time as I remembered? We only see him a handful of times throughout the book and each time the only thing he's doing is getting drunk and making an ass of himself, though... Idk, he also has a point? He has his own unique point of view, and his own unique experiences that lead him to his own ideas of how to conduct things, and it is definitely kind of true that like no one ever really listens to him or takes him seriously, despite being the King of Surda for w while at that point. I don't think there was a more graceful solution to the division of power/territory after Galbatorix was killed than what was decided upon, because like... Realistically, Orrin was never gonna be high king. He had good reason to assert for the throne, sure, but actually ascending to the throne? That is SUCH a far reach for power, unless the aim was to assimilate Surda in and have all of the humans under one crown. Nah, Nasuada giving up territory and ascending to the throne was the better choice, even if I do empathize with Orrin's point of view. It seems like Nasuada did as well, because even though she was persistent, she seemed to be gentle and sympathetic with him. He even had his line about like... "Why do you even want to do this?" "None of you would understand." Idk. Very interesting, but not tremendously notable compared to others, and he definitely was a bit of an asshole at times.

Murtagh my beloved my BELOVED I'm honestly just gonna make a whole separate essay post about him because his shit is Complicated™️ but one little note it was such a small detail at the end but I love that he said to Eragon "Hey check in on Arya about killing Shruikan. It couldn't have been easy for an elf to kill a dragon." And Eragon hadn't even THOUGHT of that and Arya probably would've been the last thing on his mind but he still was just so thoughtful. He is thoughtful like his brother and he cares so deeply and AHHH!!! And actually I want to see him and Arya be buds. I think they would have a cool dynamic. And also I love that he never once hesitated to acknowledge Eragon as his brother and just wanted to be with him and finally Eragon also acknowledged him as a brother too that last scene with them was just so good 🥹

Also I love how Thorn's like only spoken line in the whole series (until November) is to boop Eragon on the forehead and say "Hi. Thank you for not killing my rider. :)" and Murtagh is just like "Yeah thanks for that. 😒"

Love how quick Saphira and Fírnen hit it off lol. They really played tag and wrestled for like five minutes and then were like "Alright we're gonna go fuck like now see y'all later ✌️" And Eragon's like "Is this??? Okay???" And Saphira's like "Pfft dragon's don't mate for life 🤷‍♀️" Their little romance was so cute.

CAN WE FUCKING TALK ABOUT QUEEN AND RIDER ARYA??? That shit is by FAR the wildest endgame decision Chris made because like. That. That's so fucking. Oh my god??? Like, one, poor Arya!! She just wanted to be a rider and have adventures! She probably would've either spent her time happy herrying eggs across Alegaësia, or she would've gone with Eragon to Mount Arngor, but you can NOT convince me that she would be particularly happy as queen. She's grieving the loss of her mother that she barely had a relationship with, and denied the other eleven leaders for a full week before they convinced her to do it!!! Girlie!!! You deserve to be happy!!! And, two, the obvious point of holy shit that is such an enormous power imbalance in favor of the elves. Like, there is a REASON the riders were separate in the first place!! And, you know, Galbatorix JUST died and now there is another rider/monarch and it's the ELVES who have historically been both the most powerful race, and the race with the best relationship with the dragons. And Arya is the ONLY RIDER LEFT IN ALEGAËSIA!!! Because Eragon is gone (and stubbornly convinced that He Shall Never Again Return Oh Woe Is Him) and Murtagh is... Also gone to an extent. He at the very least holds no political power. Basically everyone hates him, and those that don't can't do more than, like, pardon him, for whatever that's worth. I just can't see this not rubbing people the wrong way, and not coming to an eventual head. Nasuada and Arya are both great, but I just get the feeling there is going to eventually be some sort of conflict between them, no matter how much neither of them want it. I do think Arya is perhaps the least corruptible person, other than maybe Eragon but... I don't knowwww maaaan it's complicated!!

Also I regret to inform everyone that rereading the last little bit did make me ship Eragon and Arya a teensy tinsy itty little bit. Just a liiiiittle bit. Like idk the last fairth and the telling each other their true names and calling each other their true names and Eragon's grief at leaving and his vow to love her forever and her insinuation of maybe one day just got to me alright???

There were a lot of cool magic things in this book! Like the pocket space that the Eldunarí were kept in? Cuaroc's body? More shit that I'm forgetting? God I would just love, like, a magical encyclopedia or something idk. Lots of cool shit. And artifacts!! I want to learn about more magical artifacts.

Also at my Galbatorix stan mutual? I'm a certified Murtagh Girlie™️ and therefore obligated to hold a grudge but like. I do get it. He is a... Very competent villain.

Alright I think that's it for now but. Wow. Man oh man. There is a reason I love this series. I'll probably think of some more things to talk about later, and I'm gonna be participating in the Big Bang, and I'll probably post about The Fork, The Witch, and The Worm as I reread that but yeah!!! Can't wait for November!!

[oh-no-its-bird]

hello dear author may i get ur opinion on genma. perhaps even genma/kakashi. perhaps. mayhaps. i just think they r neat and if u put them together that's double the neatness.

I love Genma so much actually, I think he's one of my favorite supporting characters to see in fics. Whenever I need a character to fill the roll of "random shinobi" I tend to default to him bc of biases (also his senbon is cool!! I love characters w a gimmick of just having like a toothpick in their mouth, and he has that but w a lethal presumably poisoned needle!! Love that for him)

I don't know how much canon actually provides for him character wise (never actually interacted with canon media lmao, I'm all fanfic) but I feel like there's honestly a lot of wiggle room with him

One of my personal favorite takes that (if I remember right) stems from a couple of @ blackkatmagic's fics is that he comes from a very small clan, distantly related to Orochimaru's own super small clan, the Orochi. Similar to how the Hyuuga and Uchiha are related

I lovee the mamma bear hc with him, I also love seeing him and Kakashi be any kind of friends. Currently I think one of my favorite takes on his and Kakashi's dynamic can be found in @vodkassassin's fic, Ear to the Wall.

Gemna only really shows up for a little bit, but the scenes he did get left a really big impact on me and how I see him (also the fic itself is amazing and is a very large inspiration for Orochimaru's involvement in Chasing Shadows, 10/10 read I HIGHLY recommend it, its a time travel fic but honestly even if time travel isnt your thing I'd still reccomend it bc its just one of those fics that fucks so hard you don't even care ab how you got here to start)

(<- spoken as someone obsessed with time travel fics)

Anyways, Genma/Kakashi!!

Actually thinking about it, I don't think I've seen any real fics about that pairing? I've run into it a few times as a past ship, like they hooked up once or twice or were fwb before the main pair gets together. But never one where they're the focus. That's tragic and needs to change immediatley

I love the idea of Genma being part of Kakashi's class when he graduated stupid young, never really interacting w him but like, existing. He wasn't Gai when it came to trying to hang out and around Kakashi, but he was certainly around.

No idea what he is in canon but I like to hc him as an information / infiltration specialist. So along with being around, he was also the kind of kid to really notice and keep tabs on stuff. (Konoha gossip king Gemna is THE hc to have sorry but I love it sm)

He didn't really approach Kakashi outside of any sort of casual nods or polite "hey"'s till after his whole team imploded.

I can kind of see him interacting with Kakashi in that in-between time where he was ANBU under Minato. But he was still mostly a very observant spectator, no real interaction

So then Minato dies and Kakashi goes off the deep end REAL hard, and Genma finally steps in. Maybe he joins Gai in trying to forcefully pry Kakashi out of his death spiral, maybe he approaches on his own, maybe he notices smthn or bumps into Kakashi alone while he's having a panic attack or smthn and there's a specific moment for that "final straw" where he finally decides to step in

Dunno!

But anyways that's when they start to get to be friends fr

I think Genma would be interesting and good for Kakashi at that point, bc he isn't a stranger, he knows what happened, he can make a lot of very good guesses at Kakashi's triggers and traumas and know what to avoid talking ab. But he's not Gai, who was sort of in the middle of it for a good portion of the drama, having a front row seat to it all. Which also comes with it's own emotional baggage.

Genma is a good middle ground, if that makes sense?

Also I think his calmer carefree energy would be good for Kakashi, especially at that point

They're pretty cute together!! If nothing else they make for very compelling friends when you really sit down to think ab it, and I can for sure get behind them as a real ship

Suddenly I need to go looking for fics with them as a pairing, I might come back and actually write something for them as a ship later

What's their ship name btw? I honestly don't know

[batsylikeme]

so here’s my silly little rant/opinions on the new doctor who season

if what i say pisses you off just keep scrolling mary i don’t have the energy to deal with negativity rn

so firstly i don't wanna talk abt how the new doctor regenerated okay that made absolutely no sense to me. idk why even 10 came back as well like ig donna's story was left "untold" ….but so is every other companion’s?

and idk how they split??? i really don't understand how they can do that but it’s aliens so whatever.

im also not gonna go into the christmas episode or the baby episode i...dont wanna relive that.

so!! i love the doctor i think he’s so fun and hip and his style is amazing.

personally i think the fact that he doesn’t have a set outfit is bc he’s trying to figure out who he is, which is always so exciting as the viewer going on this journey with him.

and ruby is awesome as hell!! low key fuck you writers for not making her a lesbian ( i mean she has the eyebrow slit and everything you should be ashamed).

also cool background story i love that she's interesting and a mystery. plus when villains are like "who...are you" that's always so dope.

i think that the "family" of the different "gods" is really cheesy but GOD i loved jinx they did so fucking amazing their performance was everything. i want them to act in every show ever honestly.

with that being said.. that episode specifically wasn’t my favorite, it was a cool concept but idgaf abt the beetles so 😭

and in that episode when the doctor ran away and hid?? that was new to the doctor that we know and i was like “yeah let’s go we’re gonna watch his character develop!”

so you would think it would build up to some sort of solution bc the doctor is tryna figure out who he is and that's gnarly love it

….then they DIDNT?

they didn't do anything with that?!?? at least that i was able to notice?

okay but after the jinx episode the rest of the episodes were actually fierce!

the landmine one had some really cool dialogue moments especially with the bickering like love i'm obsessed. ruby was also really cool and i love how much she cares about the doctor and how she wasn’t scared. i think that says a lot about her character. not to mention i think having her so in awe of the planets was a really good choice bc that reaction is so human and i love it.

buttttt the other characters were like mad infuriating which may have been the point? and throughout the episode it was so tense and nerve racking but the end was so anticlimactic. i loved the idea, and i loved that the dad was able to save the day (even tho i wanted the doctor to save the day but whatever) but i wanted MORE. i wanted the doctor and ruby to go into town, or to see the government and face them and call them out on the war! the fact that it was in one area the entire episode was just not it, me no likey.

the ruby centered episode was AWESOME.

that one was so unsettling (in a good way) and it was sooooo cool to see her like basically save the world and then she dies but BOOM they're back when the episode first started. i loved it, so peak doctor who timey wimey stuff

even tho i'm still a little confused as to if the lady was ruby? but whatever i still really enjoyed it i honestly have no cons on this episode it displayed what kind of person she is perfectly.

next, the bridgerton episode was fun! love the gayness they even kissed and they flirted it was so fierce. and ugh ruby’s character just keeps getting better and better honestly shes so fun and it’s so easy to root for her.

…but… the dialogue wasn’t good in this episode….at all. especially having the aliens say the word ‘cosplay’ took me out of the fantasy completely

also side note but not really-

what always impressed me growing up watching doctor who was that even back in 2005 the alien makeup was always so FIERCE like cunty boots down house houston bc it's makeup centric!

it also allows talented people to show off their skills and add really personal features to the actors who are playing the aliens. but nowadays they rely on the cgi so much that it just doesn’t seem believable and honestly it doesn't look good anymore. like mentioned before with makeup you can use the actor’s features to your advantage which creates the perfect illusion.

makeup + a LITTLE bit of cgi is the way to go and i don't get a fuck if it's more expensive ur a fucking successful ass company you have the money now USE IT

the episode itself was good until the very end when rouge sacrificed himself and then the doctor was like "i move on that's what happens" like bruh

by having him say that, it honestly makes you think that all of the losses the doctor has endured is just moments of his past, and that he’s moved on

like no i want the doctor to be angry, to be motivated!!

and that's what i think this doctor lacked.

there was no motivation or drive for him, which is so fucking stupid bc the actor is amazing.

the episode that ended with the doctor experiencing racism for the first time…you can tell that the actor put his whole heart and soul into his performance (especially the scream). he was unleashing a whole new part of his doctor and it was absolutely perfect.

so why not use that to give the doctor more motivation, more anger? seeing the doctor not being able to move on, to be selfish at times bc that makes him feel human. which would make sense BC!! he has spent so much times with humans and earth is important to him.

moving on; one of the biggest things that made this season an issue was that they cried every. single. episode.

when you only get something every once and a while it makes that thing so much more precious. the doctor only cries like once a season, and when he does it's like actually thrilling bc you don't get that side of him a lot.

and usually it's with a lot of anger bc the doctor is angry!! we've been through how many seasons of the doctor suffering?? i mean the man literally blew up his own planet. he's been thru the ringer.

there are so many episodes of the doctor not having the best morals, of him letting the villain die bc of his own selfish intentions. he's not supposed to be a hero, and i think that’s also what makes the doctor so compelling.

another con was the dialogue. one of my biggest tv / movie turn offs is when they say what they’re doing. and not in the super impressive like monologue way but in the simple way of being like "i'm cooking" like mary yeah i see you doing that??

and this season used that a lot. and again NOT in the cool monologue saving the day way speaking of that, no cool monologues? none? nada?

the best part of doctor who is when the doctor goes against all odds and saves the day with that sexy smirk and has the coolest monologue with the kick ass music in the back and during it gives you goosebumps! it also allowed the actor to put forth a lot of emotion into their performance and allowed them to build who their doctor is.

despite all of that, i did really enjoy the episode with ruby growing old and the racism episode. the fact that they didn’t have to say it was perfect and i think was a really good choice bc it was a surprise factor, especially with the doctor’s reaction. when they brought in a random character to save the day and him be so unlike the rest of his race and then kill him is always gonna be classic trope, bc my sister and i were GAGGED. perfect, absolutely perfect.

however. the season finale can go fuck itself.

UNIT is so cheesy now, and it feels so unreal and silly which i think is stupid. they’ve had this facility for so long so the fact that it is unserious now is lame. it feels really fake whenever they're trying to be serious and sciency, which is not the way to go when ur a literal army based facility.

anyways back to the season finale-yeah it was cool to have a throwback especially with the fact it was “the one who waits” that was gnarly! however,,, when sutukh whatever his name was literally kills the entire universe…it didn't feel like it??? it happened so quickly it didn't have that shock value it was supposed to and i was actually confused.

i did love the throwback to the ruby episode so it made you feel like it was tying that together which is nice!! give them some recognition yay!!

now let’s talk abt the whole plot with Ruby’s birth mother.

the build up of her real mother i mean it's been every episode when they mentioned it. in the first part where they were in the time window, that was giving me the creeps! i loved that it was scary and confusing and i couldn’t wait to figure it out!

so when the birth mother of ruby, the woman that even the god of death was infatuated with, the woman that the doctor couldn't figure out, the woman that was stuck in some sort of time thingy…………..is just a regular woman? its just some teenager who got knocked up and gave away her kid? that's it?

i've been getting edged this entire fucking season just for this?

if you enjoyed that it was a regular person i get it! it’s a throwback to whenever the doctor made his speech about how no one is ever just unimportant, which i do love and appreciate.

the whole reason she's important is bc the unknown is the most powerful thing which honestly i agree. my biggest fears are always the unknown. so yes absolutely i get it….but….are you...are you kidding me?

and then ruby leaves? ruby is done traveling with the doctor? i just. ugh.

there was so much potential and i’m just so empty now.

yes it had its cool moments, but im honestly so heartbroken and disappointed with how it turned out like, some bitch on tumblr could have written this season better than this.

i really really really hope the next season is better, at this point it’s just the writing. so get it together writers!! Ncuti is a phenomenal actor he is so fun and his range is so raw and captivating. not to mention Ruby! i’m really sad she’s leaving so soon, she was really fun and complimented the doctor well.

i can’t wait to see what’s next, and honestly no matter what i’m gonna watch doctor who bc it’s so special to me <3

[at1nys-blog]

Next Door

When you try to save your friends from bad press (your father's opinion on them) ending up having to find a way to survive it turns different than what you expected, but along the way there are your best friends, new friends and a very annoying gym bro that lives just Next Door

Previously on... Next Door//More about... Next Door//Next on... Next Door

Vol.7 Ch.30-little kids

She regretted everything: having had too many drinks; focused on the wrong guy; getting drunk to not think about what was happening, but mostly important she regretted how her main focus was Zoro interacting with kids.

She had never saw him like that, and it was not even because he didn’t notice her, he did, and she knew he saw her at her table downing drinks after drinks like no tomorrow.

Her head was throbbing so much Y/N thought her brain was about to get thrown out of her skull.

Taking her phone she checked the time: 8:33 am, then a text message got her attention. It was from Kidd, she unlocked the phone and opened the message app. A simple ‘we need to talk.’

The second she answered, he called. Y/N imagined Kidd eyeing his phone like a hawk. She laughed at that.

“Do you like him?” He started.

“Good morning to you too, I’m great just an headache. What about you? Have you slept good?” She mocked. It was insane, she thought it was just insane to start a conversation like that.

“I don’t… just answer my question. Do you like him? Yes or not?”

“First of all, who do you think I like? And second, why don’t you answer my question?” Leaving her bed she walked to the kitchen, maybe she could try and eat something.

“Because I am waiting for my answer. So? Do you like him?” Y/N had to remind him to be more specific, she had a couple of guys that she liked, not in a romantic way that’s it, but still. “Roronoa Zoro. Do you like Roronoa Zoro?” She laughed. “I’m serious don’t laugh.”

“Are you for real? Roronoa Zoro? The Roronoa Zoro that is always annoyed if I just even breath his way? Man please don’t make me laugh.”

“I’m not, I am dead serious. I didn’t say anything yesterday because it was your cousin’s wedding and I didn’t want to cause a scene but I swear…”

“You swear what? What were you going to do if we weren’t at the wedding?”

“Never mind.” The conversation was going nowhere, Kidd just started yelling and as a consequence Y/N kept raising her voice, which got Eustass Kidd angrier the more they talked.

Y/N was getting impatient, she just wanted to end the conversation here and there but whenever she tried to put an end, he started once again with his stupid ideas that she was just using him to get back at Zoro.

“You are just stupid at this point. I’m not that desperate to get a man attention like that.”

“Oh you forgot how we started talking?” She scoffed, what had that anything to do with their conversation? “I overheard you talking about Law and the second Chopper told you he is not interested in a relationship or whatever you wanted, oh look at her going into her next victim, aka me. I should have known better.”

“Hold on. Is not my fault I like it when a guy looks good. And before you could say…” he cut her off, Kidd didn’t want to know more, he made a mistake and he was paying the price of his decisions. He hung up the phone. “I can’t believe this.” She said and in the heat of the situation she smashed the plate on the ground. She had to cool off before doing anything, before having breakfast, before going out. She has to let it slide and move on with her day.

“Mutherfucker blaming me for his insecurities. Fucking bitch, how dare he yelling at me like… ugghhhh” she walked to her balcony, thinking that maybe some fresh air could have helped her. It did. A bit. Because the memories of last night came back but honestly, she was glad they did. Seeing Zoro making a child smile with just his presence was helping calming her nerves.

The phone in her pocket kept on buzzing, it was getting annoying so she decided to check what was so important to make her phone go off like that.

Zoro was pacing, back and forth in front of the door, he didn’t know what to do, nor what to think. Was the sound he heard a good or bad sign? Was she okay? Was he supposed to call an ambulance? The police? Both?

His phone dinged, taking him away from a spiral of stupid questions, to be honest, and took a deep breath when he saw it was Y/N. She had screenshoted his tweet, he didn’t care much, sent it to him and told him to get inside, the door was unlocked and that she was on the balcony.

He walked inside, the main space was clean, cleaner than what he assumed it was. Zoro had a picture of what Y/N was like and the fact that she always proved him wrong made him upset, he was always right.

Moving his focus to the kitchen, there he saw it: a plate smashed on the ground. Looking more carefully he was happy to not see a single drop of blood, thanking whoever was above him that she wasn’t hurt. Walking to the terrace he started thinking how to approach the topic, how to ask her without being too noisy and without making her mad once again. After hearing her scream he didn’t want any repeat of that.

“So, I heard you screaming and smashing things. Is everything okay?”

“Nothing is okay.” She didn’t move from her position, not a glance his way, nothing. He had to not think much about it, the two of them hated each other. “I woke up with an headache because I got drunk yesterday and I got drunk because…” a pause. “I wanted to” Zoro knew it was a lie but he didn’t care, she was talking to him without a hint of teasing in her voice and for him was good enough.

He spaced out in the middle of her talking, Zoro heard nothing of what she said after, the man was so into his own thought he forgot he was with someone else. Just when Y/N called his name he was back on planet Earth.

“Sorry, you were saying?” She rolled her eyes and walked inside. “If you don’t care, why bother asking.” It wan’t a question and he wasn’t asked to explain himself but he did it regardless. He apologized, explaining that when she talked about the wedding his mind, on its own, started to remember bits of the night before.

“Really, it wasn’t planned. I wanted to know if you were doing fine, genuinely curious.” She sat on her couch and he followed, cautions in case she didn’t want him there. Y/N didn’t say a word, he took it as a good sign, it was fine for him to take a seat next to her. “So, if is not too much to ask, why were you screaming.”

“Eustass fucking Kidd.” Zoro noticed how she called him by his name and not referred to him as ‘punk boy’. He had to bit the inside of his cheeks to not smile at that. “Man is so insecure he thinks I was using him. He implied am I an attention seeker. Do you think I seek for attention?” She was now looking at him, deep into his eyes, his soul. He felt weird.

“No, I don’t think so. Also, Eustass is stupid so don’t listen to him. He is always wrong.” He said. He knew she was going to say something stupid so he managed to play his cards right by anticipating her next question by shutting it down before she could even ask.

“Thanks.” Never in his life he ever thought to heard that word from her, not if it was meant for him, no sir. He didn’t say anything, until he had an idea.

“Are you free today?” Y/N looked at him confused, Zoro could guess what she was thinking right now, but just waited for an answer. She told him Franky was nice enough to give her a day off. “Great. So go change, I have something in mind that might take your mind off of things.” She pondered what to do, he saw it but then agreed.

“I’ll be right back.” She said heading to her room.

Y/N was dying inside. She wanted to know where were they going, what were they going to do, but she didn’t dare to ask. Zoro had told her it was going to be a surprise, so even if she asked he wasn’t going to talk.

“Please tell me.” She gave in. She couldn’t stay any longer without knowing.

“I told you it is a surprise, and besides we are almost there.” He answered.

It was true, not even five minutes later Zoro parked his car and invited her to get out the car, to which she didn’t have to be told twice.

“A…dojo?” Seeing the building she was in a loss for words. Why did he took her there? Was she going to take part of the class? Was he going to give her a private lesson? What was happening?

“Yeah, I have a lesson and a meeting with a special guest. I thought it was going to be of help. I can drive you back home if you want.” Y/N looked at him, then she looked back at the dojo. Her eyes shifted between the man and the building a couple of times, she couldn’t believe what was happening. “So?”

She agreed. It could go any worst than this morning right?

She regretted accepting the idea. She was surrounded by kids, not older than 10 years old, asking questions and question and more questions all together. Some of them complimented her beauty, one of the kids joked about being the happiest guy if she was to go out with him.

“Do you like master Roronoa?” She didn’t know if she was supposed to laugh or yell at the kid for the question. It took her sometimes to come up with an answer good enough to shut him up but before she could mutter a single word, Zoro walked in.

Y/N had a thought, for a second she had an unholy thought about Zoro dressed in that samurai edoten. The color wasn’t that flattering but she knew that if it was anyone else they couldn’t pull it off as much as Zoro was.

He smiled at her, the kids too immersed in the stretching session to notice the exchange of looks the two adults were having. Y/N scoffed and went back to the exercises.

After the stretching was over, Zoro personally handed the students a wooden sword.

“Do as much as you can. This time I won’t push you too much.” He said, winking at her.

“No, I don’t…”

“Okay now, before the beautiful lady that joined us can waste our time take your position and let’s start.” Y/N’s mind was racing, she couldn’t believe he thought she was coming back at the dojo; she couldn’t believe he winked at her while saying that; she couldn’t believe he called her beautiful. He just called her beautiful and she didn’t know what that meant.

She couldn’t ask for explanations, she couldn’t take Zoro outside and ask him to explain himself so she just kept on doing what she was told to do.

Zoro was happy, happier than usual. He loved training his little samurai in the art. He grew up in the dojo, he was immersed in such a beautiful tradition he took proud in teaching the new generations about it, in hope they would take it to heart and teach it to the future generations.

His happiness was because she was laughing. It was the first time since the wedding he saw her laughing to her heart content and now, watching his students show off in front of her, Y/N was having the time of her life.

“Okay okay, enough now. Give me back the swords and go change. I have a little surprise so don’t be late.” As on cue the kids rushed to Zoro heading their weapon, Y/N followed in tow. “You can go home if you want, I need to stay and check the kids for another hour and a half.” He said once she was close enough to hear him. Unbeknownst to the both of them the kids were looking at them, laughing and giggling at the interaction.

“I think I’m going to stay. I don’t want to go home yet. If that’s okay, of course.” He waited before answering.

“Go change then. I’ll see you at the front desk later.” Zoro watched her leave the room and when he was sure she couldn’t him he called his little students. “Okay, listen to me. The lady that joined us today had a pretty bad morning so now do me a favor. Either in groups or one by one, I really don’t care, go to the garden by the main entrance and give her a compliment. Anything to make her smile okay?” They all nodded “great, now go change first.”

It didn’t took Zoro long to change so he was able to see, from afar that’s it, the kids doing as they were told, watching carefully how Y/N reacted at the compliments she was receiving.

“I thought you hated her?” Kuina asked, stopping next to her cousin.

“I thought that too.” He said. “Now let’s get this room ready for our guests.”

[slugtranslation-hypmic]

Hi Slug! If you've listened to the full songs in the new EP, have your opinions of the trailers changed? Also, the new dramas are HEAVY, so if you've listened to them, I'm curious to know what you thought of them. As always, thanks for the translations!

I like listening to Hypmic music on shuffle during workouts, so I've most of the new songs in full by now. I don't think my opinions have changed majorly. I really enjoy Black and White, and Move Your Body Till You Die is a phenomenal work of art.

As for the drama tracks... truth be told, I haven't even listened to the one that came out in April, so I'll read through some TLs now and record thoughts below the cut:

No One Lives Forever, translation courtesy of shinseimcd on Twitter

"Anti-Party of Words faction" Huh, like a government faction? I'm surprised the PoW allows other political parties or at the very least open dissenters. There was talk in some chapters of the manga of them punishing protesters, not to mention the way they crushed the TDD rebellion in its primacy. Either way, interesting, and I hope we learn more about this as time goes on.

Ichijiku and Nemu baking together is really cute lol

I love the way Ichijiku's whole personality shifts around Otome. Gap moe (????)

It's a cool tidbit that Nemu tends to prefer plainer outfits, as that tracks with how she dresses in TDD. Also, Nemu and Ichijiku shopping together is kind of bittersweet, since Ichijiku is clearly using Nemu as a replacement figure for her deceased sister...

Ichijiku secretly wanting to fall on the cute side of the cute/elegant spectrum is a pretty classic trope but a fun detail that's been hinted at already, since we've seen that she keeps a bow collection.

??? Rei's lab is on Battleship Island? Ohhhhhhhhh this is why Twitter was blowing up with controversy right after this track released... The IRL Battleship Island was home to forced labor of Korean and Chinese citizens during the twentieth-century push of Japanese imperialism which was later, iirc, denied in part or totally by the Japanese government to immense international backlash. Using this as a setpiece for Hypmic is oddly provocative, and I can't think why the writers would want to do that. On a much lighter note, this is also a headscratcher to me because isn't this a UNESCO World Heritage Site? The whole point of that is conservation, and I don't think building a clone lab counts as conservation... Unless they're implying the clone lab was built prior to the 1950s? Hm. Let's not go down this rabbit hole.

"I would like all of the True Hypnosis Mics. As well as all the Amemura clones." Oh? Are there more still alive? I thought Honobono ordered the death of the last remaining three... Well, that scraps a piece of writing I was working on LOL

"Your biometric data is required to access the mic storage facility" So how did the PoW get in?

Her? Heart stop beating? Oh for fuck's sake, is Rei's wife also in a coma? How many fucking characters are in a coma in this series... Whichever mfer invents a device that restores people from comas with no significant brain damage will make a fortune in this universe

"And I won't try anything funny." I do not believe this for one instant

Hmm, the framing of Otome planning this and the way she brushed past talk of countermeasures for the anti-PoW faction implies that Rei is heading this faction.

Oh, so they couldn't get past the biometric locks after all, I see.

I strongly dislike the idea of thirty clones for thirty mics and the nonchalance in which Rei goes, "Yeah, I'll ship them off to Chuuouku" like they're a parcel and not human beings, but that's my personal bone to pick w/ this character and setting.

I was intrigued by the notion of the PoW holding caucuses, implying there's some sort of democratic process in terms of choosing their own party members or positions, but the JPN audio doesn't specify that exactly.

"We no longer require the cooperation of Jakurai Jinguji." I know that this took like four years in real time, but in terms of the Hypmic universe... I mean, Jakurai didn't even do anything for them, did he? He went through all that moral dilemma for nothing, as far as I can tell. (I get that it sets up the reconciliation with Ramuda, but that's it? Seriously?) That's disappointing to roll it back so quickly.

"During the Division Rap Battle, the people of our nation will be focused on the tournament, giving us the opportunity to use the True Hypnosis Mics to mind hack the Anti-Party of Words faction who stand in our way, ultimately pulling them over to our side." Otome always has the most batshit plans. God bless. A consequence of her needing to drive the plot forward is that she'll say some of the truly silliest things I've ever heard. What a complete misappropriation of government funds lol. Also... is this stating there are only 30 dissidents (????), or can the True Hypmics brainwash more than one person at a time?

"Once that is complete, we will move on to other countries. And when we have taken over the world, then, in the true sense of the word, peace through the power of words will be achieved." LMAO? I'm sorry, this isn't very considerate of me, but in my initial impressions of this, I am well and truly gobsmacked. What in the actual fuck. How many clones will die for this? How much money will it cost? How does she think she stands any chance at governing so many people across such an area, even with a downsized population after WWIII? Homie... Never change, Hypmic, you are the wildest.

I can't believe Ichijiku is so whipped she's willing to go along with an absolutely nonsensical plan for world domination. Ma'am, Otome is not going to fuck you, and even if she is, it's not worth it! Ma'am!!! I'm sorry, I'm being petty and not giving this a lot of in-depth thought but LORD this is a trip on first read.

A FUCKING CLONE UPRISING AT THE HANDS OF REI? HAHAHAHAHA.

"World domination, huh, what a joke." Man after my own heart.

I'm actually quite interested in how this "mics are disabled forever" thing works. I guess the mics have a kill switch in them? I vaguely recall someone saying that in the manga years and years ago... Oh yeah, it was Ramuda in TDD 12. Huh, interesting if that was intentional foreshadowing (I'm not sure if I want to be that charitable). At any rate, can't everyone in the room just get new mics? Or does it affect their speakers and such too? I'm curious how that works, like if you build an affinity with a certain mic or some nonsense.

"looks like we won't be having any Division Rap Battles from here on out." Ah, and this is why the other half of Twitter was up in arms like "No more DRB??? End of Hypmic??" I guess.

The Block Party tracks are quite long, and since it's getting rather late for me, I'm going to leave off here for the moment. I'd like to continue this at my next available opportunity... WHAT a ride. Not sure when that will be, but I will add to this with a reblog when I can. And I know it's been months since this track came out, but I would love to hear other people's thoughts. I wasn't around much when it first launched, so I missed most of the commentary on it.

[antiv3nom]

Bedman (Romeo)

omg havent had an excuse to talk abt bedman in a hot minute thank u anon...

favorite thing about them:

i love the tragedy of his story arc... that feels like a weird thing to say but its the first thing that came to mind! just. look. the road to hell paved with good intentions bit taken to the extreme really works here!!! the idea that he remembered the name of every person he ever killed because he was under the impression he could bring them all back, only to have the rug pulled from under him? hurts me! in the best way!!!

other than that i do enjoy his design, both romeo himself and the bed :] i wanna give my bedman cosplay another try sometime for sure, it didnt work out for various reasons but i have most of the components and would enjoy cosplaying him fr in the future

least favorite thing about them:

i think i dont really dislike anything about the way bedman is written in the source material strongly enough to point it out here? i think my main gripe is the way the fandom treats him to either extreme, like theres "bedman did nothing wrong ever" people and "bedman is horrific" people and i wish both camps would chill out and recognize hes like. a complex character? but i do think most people do this already which i can appreciate

favorite line:

im a little obsessed w his win line against may in xrd

"I do not understand humans who are motivated by love. A person is born, lives for a number of years, and interacts with up to eight billion people. What proof is there of something they can't even define?"

bc like. buddy. you dont even realize it. YOURE driven by love. all this shit wasnt just for yourself but it was for delilah too!!! fuck!!! you dont even see it as love you see it as necessary because shes that important to you!!! and dont even get me STARTED on the bed in strive and how its still running because of his last minute code additions which almost act as the last part of his will to protect delilah. GAHHHH

brOTP:

BEDMAN AND AXL INTERACTIONS. PLEASE. PLEASE. their dynamic is so interesting as characters with such fascinating ways of interacting with the world...gah. GAH. and no one fucking talks about it!!!

OTP:

sinbed. must i wlabo.

ok but i will, im not as into them as i was like a year ago but i still do really enjoy their dynamic. sin being such a beacon of hope and being so willing to see people as good contrasted with a post-xrd living bedman (bc all my sinbed stuff exists within au but im having fun out here so sue me) seeing himself as inherently evil due to his actions despite his intentions and believing no one would ever care for him? it hits for me

nOTP:

i dont know of anything off the top of my head that ive seen for him??? nothing prevalent at least.

actually on second thought i think ive seen like one instance of bedman and ram in a romantic sense, and that im not a fan of but i guess i could see the appeal, just not my thing

random headcanon:

this motherfucker would have gotten heated in some internet forums or wiki talk pages, DEDICATED to accuracy out here and he WILL fight you about it

unpopular opinion:

not entirely certain i have one? i think the "bedman while flawed is not actually a terrible person and was doing his best given his extremely fucked up circumstances" is a pretty cool take by this point for most people

i think the only thing i have is that my interpretation of bedman has always been as like a young adult rather than a kid but like i dont really have a concrete opinion on that and i totally understand people who do see him as a kid like its entirely understandable to do so

song i associate with them:

other than his character themes, its GOTTA be dramaturgy by eve, which just. it gives the vibes. read the english lyrics it will make sense i prommy

favorite image of them:

THE EEPER...

OTHER than this one its more an animation but his 6p in xrd is so silly i love it so bad...and for a more serious option his instant kill is really cool

[canonmisogynyvictimstournament]

PROPAGANDA

ALLURA (VOLTRON: LEGENDARY DEFENDER)

1.) Okay so, they really wanted Allura to be a #girlpower icon, but the way that came about is that they basically stripped her from having emotions. She only cries once in the whole show, and it was in the first season (when the show was actually good.) After her one cry she basically becomes a leader figure who doesn’t get to bond much with the other characters. They then decided to pass her around as a romantic interest to three different men. The first one was only set up, but she ends up dating two of them within the show’s short run. The second character they set her up with turns out to have enslaved her people. The third character they set her up with has been shown to be interested in her through the shows run. Despite Allura’s consistent lack of interest, she ends up being pressured into going on a date with him. Despite it being a terrible date (in my opinion) they decide to peruse a relationship. The relationship is terrible and they really only spend time together to rant about their problems. At the end of the season, the very same one where this relationship started, Allura sacrifices herself to save the universe. This stupid fucking decision not only came out of nowhere in terms of in-universe logic, but also that her death is treated as sad because the guy lost his girlfriend. Most of the other characters don’t really morn her, and the guy she was dating just becomes sadly obsessed with the idea of her for the rest of his life. Not really the nice send-off for the #girlboss.

2.) She was given plenty character, but not a lot of things to do narratively speaking.

She wanted to free the Galaxy from tyranny. She's the leader even though she doesn't pilot the black lion. She's can talk to mice. She's kind, and she's among the the last of her kind. Her home planet was destroyed. She kept going even when things looked horrendous. She had to wait 10,000 in stasis sleep before she could fight to protect others. Because her father wanted to protect her and made the wrong decision in not fighting the Galra with Voltron. She had to destroy the AI of her father when he was corrupted in season 1. She had to deal with her Dad dying twice.

She had cool powers like shapeshifting but didn't get to use them often. She starts piloting the blue lion, at season 3. Her father worked with the big bad Zarkon and she is portrayed just to hate him. When it was more like she was completely betrayed by him.

She didn't get alot of interactions with the other cool female characters. Even Pidge who was on her team, which can only form Voltron through teamwork. 8 seasons and they never talk about how how much they miss their families. Pidge's main motivation is finding her father and brother. It would have been perfect. The only time they hangout is to get Allura ready for a date.

She was distrusting of all Galra since there empire wiped out her kingdom. But when she got an arc about learning to not distrust all Galra. It functionally ended with Prince Lotor of the Galra making people batteries out of the survivor's of her kingdom.

Then she was basically relegated to her relationship with Lance's interaction wise. She didn't get many interactions with anyone else she was close to in the season she died. Not even with Coran, the guy put in stasis with her.

For the finale she dies sacrificing herself to restore all realites. She had to give up her new family and her people. She would do that, I just don't think the writers had earned doing that. She deserved a happy ending. She never gets to see that her sacrifice even brought back her planet.

3.) season 8. Season 8. SEASON 8. Allura deserved so much better than an out of nowhere romance arc with Lance and then dying without being able to say goodbye to Coran (her royal advisor, closest friend, and last remaining member of her family and her planet). AND they had her give Altean marks to Lance right before dying, leaving him with a constant reminder of her for the rest of his life!! Why!!!!!!!!! AND THEN THE LIONS FLY BACK INTO SPACE TOWARDS A NEBULA SHAPED LIKE HER, LIKE THE WHOLE FINALE WAS SATISFYING AND NOT A MASTERCLASS IN UNSATISFYING CHARACTER ENDINGS!!!!!! Allura you will always be the confident princess and leader of the rebellion in my heart i am so so sorry season 8 happened to you

MIKAELA BANES (TRANSFORMERS)

1.) mikaela's case is so egregious that i struggle to really properly word any propaganda beyond 'just look at the movie. look at it.' but congrats to mikaela banes for getting in! was thinking of submitting her along with my arcee but couldn't even like. begin to describe it. agh.

best i can really say for her right now is 'open her tfwiki article, open sam's, look at the pictures, compare how they frame the two, you will see what i mean then and there.' but i might do a rewatch of the bayverse transformers movies just to be able to get all my more complex thoughts in order to actually submit a breakdown of her. which is not something i want to do, but if anyone deserves it it's mikaela. she deserved so much better.

2.) She was the female character played by Megan Fox, and Michael Bay wanted to make sure everyone watching knew this was a woman played by megan fox. She is the quintessential "not like other girls" (in fact, this is the second sentence of her wikipedia page - "She is differentiated from "typical" women in her age group, having inherited mechanical skills from her father") who has guy interests, but is still hot and wears crop tops and jean shorts. I remember two things from that movie, Bumblebee and the scene where she is working on the car ~sexily~, which today genuinely seems like a parody, but was included entirely earnestly (I wasn't going to add a picture from this scene, but it was literally the first and third pictures that showed up when i googled her)

3.) Mikaela is so sexualized it's unreal. Like, I feel I really just need to submit this screenshot:

Look at the way she's posed, the way she's dressed, the fact her head isn't in the shot. It's pure objectification, like the kind that should be in textbooks as easy examples. The way it emphasizes both her butt and her boobs but also shows her stomach is just astonishing. God it doesn't even show her FACE. This shot really amazes me, just good god.

And then there's also this famous shot:

It's so aggressively sexy, so much a pose and not at all a way a real human would position themselves. The way her ass is popped out, the way her hair is flipped, jesus christ. Someone needs to put Michael Bay in misogyny jail.

[nightcrawlerzincorporated]

I'm curious about what your opinion on dtamhd is?

I talked about it a bit when the episode first came out, but I'll summarize my thoughts for the new folk. This is all just my personal opinion/interpretation, feel free to disagree, etc etc

I really like DTAMHD! Dennis is my favorite boy and I enjoy being with him for 20 minutes and watching him bop around trying to keep his cool and be kind to people while he slowly loses his mind. I fuck very heavily with the idea that Dennis actually does try to be calm and kind most of the time, he just gets overwhelmed by his own emotions and lashes out because he has no healthy outlit or healthy coping mechanisms. And he refuses to accept help from others because he doesn't trust anyone but himself with his mind and body because growing up every adult in his life that we know of abused him in some way. So when he has a problem, like high blood pressure, he keeps it all inside and tries to deal with it himself, which just makes him more stressed and miserable. I really like all the little things in his fantasy that actually do highlight parts is his real life, like him having to be on Frank's family plan, forever tied to him and relying on him even as an adult, or him crying "nightmare nightmare please somebody help me". We love to see a man suffer on this blog. But that's the aspect of the episode people usually don't have a problem with. Let's get more controversial

My interpretation of the ending is that Dennis did not actually lower his own blood pressure, he's just so stuck in this fantasy version of his life where he has control and where things can't hurt him that he blocks out the negative information and replaces it with positive. I don't see it as a "win" for Dennis because I don't think he succeeded at all in actually changing anything. I think the fact that the gang's phone call at the end is the exact same one that's explicitly a fantasy is supposed to clue us in that this is fake too, the difference is Dennis isn't aware that it's still a fantasy because he's so wrapped up in his own idea of himself as someone who CAN lower his own blood pressure and someone who the gang needs and relies on. So he has these purposeful fantasies to help him cope, but those fantasies still bleed in to real life and color his perception of himself and the world even though he thinks to himself that he's in control of the fantasy. But much like how he can't actually control his physical health, he can't control his mental health either, and this constant fantasizing that he can do all these things has led him to see a distorted version of reality where he doesn't have to change or grow or learn. Which is kind of the core of the whole show if you think about it. I do agree completely with the criticism that Dennis actually having the ability to lower his own blood pressure is stupid, so I get hating the end if you see it as him returning to reality and being successful in his endeavors, but that's not how I see it, so it's not an issue for me.

I can also understand why people could see the heart eating scene as a serial killer Dennis thing and dislike it because of that, but that's not how I saw it at all. It's really goofy and cartoony and obviously not real when he rips the guy's heart out and eats it; it's not about killing someone (the guy doesn't even look hurt at all, he just stands there watching Dennis—I think a real murder fantasy would focus on the pain and dying but it’s not about that, it’s about defeating a metaphorical evil, not a literal man) it's about oversimplifying the world. There’s so many fun different ways you can interpret the CEO, like that he represents Dennis’ relationship with himself or with the world or with his parents, etc. I think if you detach yourself from the literal image and look at things in a more abstract, metaphorical way it makes the scene and the episode as a whole more enjoyable—but I understand that’s not something everyone is interested in doing.

That’s why it doesn’t just feel like a retelling of Glenn’s real life experience to me—I think there’s a lot of Dennis-specific ideas and systems (lol) throughout the episode that give it more symbolism and weight and makes it into a good (imo) narrative.

And I get why, if you’re the type of person who feels a Sunny season should end with a story about the entire gang, or about the gang helping one of them do something big, or something similar, DTAMHD would be disappointing, but I personally have no expectations for what a Sunny finale “should” be, so I wasn’t bothered by the fact that Dennis never opened up to anyone or had any real growth. I was just along for the ride.

I really enjoy the fact that the episode has a lot you can read into and a lot that’s open to interpretation, but that’s also the exact reason different people came away with such different views of the episode. I love when Sunny takes risks and makes unique episodes like this. And I like watching Glenn Howerton smear blood all over his mouth