#my whole life has been banana hate

[llamagoddessofficial]

What's your favourite banana flavour?

dude I just absolutely love banana flavour. Banana is my favourite flavour and also my favourite food of all time

[hd-junglebook]

My Sunshine

Part 1 - rewrite of the original

Warnings - pregnancy, flirting, verbal abuse, gaslighting, slight mention of prostitution, unwanted pregnancy, abortion, crying, banana muffins

a:n I'm so in love with the way that this came out, I could literally faint. I want to this man. ferally. In the most respectful way that I can put it. Had me giggling like a SLUT. Like look at that face, come on..

Masterlist Link

GIF by jonasiegenthaler

Summary: Y/N reminisces about her past, the faint memory of her hateful mother as reality starts to really sink in. Along comes jack and his giddy smile, eager to get to know our dear sunshine.

Word Count ~ 4k

1 month later

10:00am

The doctor's voice cuts through the heavy silence, their tone professional yet laced with a hint of warmth. "While we wait for the results, can you tell me the date of your last menstrual period and any potential dates of conception?"

Y/N takes a deep, steadying breath, her mind instantly transported back to the haunting echoes of her mother's cruel words. The memories feel so visceral, as if the scenes are playing out before her eyes once more.

"I wish one day, you could see why I raised you the way I did. You're so weak, gullible, and always so goddamn sensitive. It's pathetic, really." Her mother's voice drips with disdain, the familiar sting of her judgement cutting deep.

Y/N can practically feel the weight of her mother's disapproving stare, the contempt burning in her eyes. "Just like your useless father, y/n. You've never been and will never be good enough, not like me."

"You will need me one day, when you have a baby, you're gonna wish I was the one there helping you, holding your hand. But I won't be, because you've always been a disappointment, a burden I never wanted." The thought of facing motherhood without the unwavering support she so desperately craves fills Y/N with dread.

"I hate you, y/n, and I wish I would've gotten rid of you when I had the chance. I never regretted anything more than letting your useless father talk me into keeping you. I lost my whole life raising you - I slaved and sold myself to put food on the table, all for you ungrateful little shits." The bitterness in her mother's voice is palpable, a raw wound that has never fully healed.

Forcing the memories to the back of her mind, Y/N provides the doctor with the requested information to the best of her recollection.

A knot forms in her stomach as the details flow from her lips, a painful reminder of the intimate moments with Jason - moments that had once filled her with such joy and hope, but now only serve to heighten her anxiety.

The doctor nods, jotting down the notes on their clipboard. They continue the conversation, their tone gentle and understanding, offering Y/N a sense of comfort in the midst of the emotional turmoil.

After what feels like an eternity, they excuse themselves to check on the test results. The room falls silent, save for the ticking of the clock – each second a countdown to the life-changing news that awaits Y/N.

When the doctor returns, they have a file in hand. Taking a seat beside Y/N, they meet her gaze, their expression softening with a warmth that puts her at ease, even as her heart races in anticipation.

"Y/N," they begin gently, their voice filled with empathy, "the urine test came back positive for hCG. Congratulations, you're pregnant." The doctor pauses, studying Y/N's face for a moment before continuing. "I understand this may be an overwhelming time, but I want you to know that we're here to support you every step of the way."

Y/N feels her breath catch in her throat, the news hitting her like a physical blow.

Part of her had hoped, prayed, that the results would be negative, that the at home test she took a few weeks ago were wrong, that she wouldn't have to face the daunting prospect of motherhood, especially without Jason's support.

But now, as the reality of her situation sinks in, she can't help but feel utterly alone, trapped in the shadow of her mother's cruelty. Following down the same path she did when she was 18 but only she was 23, grown, and by herself.

"What am I going to do?" she whispers, tears falling to the ground.

A sudden movement in front of her face snapped Y/N out of her trance, her body jolting in response. "I'm sorry," she blurted out, hastily wiping the tears from her eyes.

The doctor slid back onto his stool, a warm smile on his face as he handed her a stack of pamphlets. "I’m very happy for you," he said, mistaking her tears for joy. "Here are some resources for young mothers. I know this must be an exciting, but overwhelming time. Please don't hesitate to reach out if you have any questions or concerns."

Y/N stared at the man, momentarily confused, until the reality of the situation came crashing back.

…

11:30am

Y/N stood in line at 'The Brew' coffee shop, the warm, inviting aroma of freshly brewed coffee enveloping her like a comforting embrace, soft Russian music playing over the stereo. The rich scent of roasted beans mingled with the subtle sweetness of vanilla and caramel, instantly lifting her spirits.

As she waited patiently, her eyes wandered to the man next to her, who seemed lost in thought. He was engrossed in a conversation on his phone, his brow furrowed in concentration, creating a series of deep lines that etched themselves into his forehead.

He shuffled his feet nervously, the movement causing the light to catch on the polished leather of his shoes. His gaze flickered to the menu before him, a brief moment of indecision flashing across his face, and Y/N found herself wondering what could be troubling him.

Unable to resist the urge to learn more, she stole a glance at him, admiring the way the soft, golden light of the café danced across his features. The angles of his jawline were sharp and defined, a stark contrast to the soft, inviting curve of his lips that seemed to beckon her closer.

As if sensing her gaze, he suddenly turned, and their eyes met. In that instant, the world seemed to slow down, the bustling noise of the café fading into the background as Y/N was enveloped in a moment of pure connection. His eyes, a mesmerizing blue, held her captive, sparkling with a hint of mischief that ignited a spark within her.

A confident smile spread across his face, and he leaned away slightly, speaking into the phone. “Alright Lukey, I gotta go.”

"Hey, you're my neighbor, right?" he asked, the recognition evident in his tone. "You live on Baker Street?"

Y/N blinked, surprised by his sudden acknowledgment. "Yes, I do."

Yet, as she spoke, Y/N felt her shyness begin to melt away, like frost under the warmth of his unwavering gaze. There was a magnetic pull to this stranger, an allure that she found herself inexplicably drawn to.

"I'm Jack," he said, extending his hand towards her. His movements were fluid and graceful, his arm cutting through the space between them with a sense of purpose.

As he reached out, Y/N couldn't help but notice the way his fingers flexed, the tendons in his hand shifting beneath his skin like the strings of a finely tuned instrument.

Hesitating for only a moment, Y/N slipped her hand into his, relishing the gentle firmness of his grip. "It's nice to meet you, Jack," she replied, a hint of a smile playing at the corners of her mouth as she held his gaze, unwilling to be the first to break the connection.

He leaned against the counter, his gaze locked on Y/N, as if she was the only person in the crowded coffee shop. "I've been wondering when I'd get the chance to officially introduce myself."

Y/N felt her cheeks flush with heat, suddenly keenly aware of his undivided attention. "I, um, I'm not usually one for small talk," she admitted, her words coming out in a flustered jumble.

Jack chuckled, the sound low and rich. "Lucky for you, I more than make up for that." He flashed her a dazzling smile, his blue eyes sparkling with mischief. "I'm quite the chatterbox, as I'm sure you're about to find out."

Caught off guard by his confidence, Y/N found herself relaxing, drawn in by his easy charm. As the line moved forward, she fell into step beside him, her shoulders brushing against his as they approached the counter.

"So, what's your order of choice?" Jack asked, his gaze sweeping over the menu. "I'm a bit of a coffee connoisseur myself."

Y/N blinked, momentarily flustered by his proximity. "Um, usually anything caramel flavored, I think," she replied, her voice barely above a whisper. “I’m leaning towards tea today though.”

Jack's lips curved into a grin. "Excellent choice. A classic, just like you."

"Can I have a banana muffin? And whatever she's getting, we're together." Jack said, flashing the barista a charming smile.

The barista nodded, punching in the order as Y/N stood there, momentarily stunned by Jack's gesture. She managed to give a small smile, her heart pounding erratically in her chest.

"After you," Jack said, gesturing towards the pickup counter. He placed a gentle hand on the small of her back, guiding her forward.

Y/N felt a shiver run down her spine at his touch, her nerves alight. As they waited for their order, Jack turned to her, his sapphire eyes sparkling. “Just a green tea please. And a banana muffin too.” She added, meeting jack’s eyes for a second.

"Such a gentleman," y/n teased. Jack laughed, flashing her a wink. He turned towards the seating area, gesturing for Y/N to follow. "Come on, let's find a cozy spot."

Y/N felt herself being drawn along by his infectious energy, her feet moving almost of their own accord as she trailed behind him. He led them to a small table by the window, pulling out a chair for her before taking a seat across from her.

She didn’t know what to do with herself as she took the seat he offered, settling in across from him. The way he was looking at her, with such open curiosity and intrigue, made her heart race.

"So, Y/N, tell me - what brings you to this fine establishment on this lovely day?" Jack asked, leaning back in his chair and regarding her with a playful smile.

Y/N felt herself relax slightly under his warm gaze. "Just my usual coffee run, nothing too exciting," she admitted shyly.

"Ah, but any day that starts with a chance encounter like this is anything but ordinary," Jack countered, his eyes twinkling. "You've got nowhere else to be, right? No urgent errands or appointments calling your name?"

Y/N shook her head, a small smile playing on her lips. "No, nothing pressing that I can think of."

"Excellent." Jack leaned forward, his elbows resting on the table as he studied her intently. "Then you won't mind if I take the opportunity to learn more about the mysterious neighbor from Baker Street?"

…

Jack's eyes crinkled with delight as the barista arrived with their order, setting down a steaming latte in front of Y/N and a banana muffin alongside it.

"Ah, perfect timing," he said, flashing the barista a grateful smile. The scent of the baked treat mingled with the rich aroma of coffee, creating a tantalizing combination that did little to calm her already frazzled nerves.

Glancing down at her phone, she quickly typed out a message to her friend Heather, her fingers trembling slightly. 'You're never going to believe this, but this unbelievably gorgeous guy just bought me a coffee and we're sitting at a table together! I'm honestly freaking out right now - I have no idea what to do.'

She hit send, her fingers trembling slightly as she placed the phone back on the table, unsure of what to do next.

Y/N couldn't help but sneak a peek at Jack, who was leaning back in his chair, a warm smile playing on his lips as he took a contemplative sip of his own coffee. The way the morning light danced across his striking features only served to heighten his already captivating presence.

 "So, Y/N, what do you do for a living?" he asked, his gaze warm and curious. "I have a feeling there's more to you than just your 'usual coffee run'." His gaze latched back onto hers, his eyes sparkling with genuine curiosity.

Y/N felt heat rise to her cheeks at his words, both flattered and flustered by his obvious interest. "Well, I, uh, I sometimes write for a sports magazine," she stammered, her heart fluttering erratically. "And I'm also working on a couple of novels in my spare time."

Jack's face lit up with delight, and he leaned forward, his elbows resting on the table as he studied her intently. "A writer, huh? That's incredibly impressive. What kind of sports do you cover?"

"A little bit of everything, really," Y/N replied, slowly beginning to relax under the warmth of his gaze. "But I do have a particular fondness for hockey as of recently. There's just something about the intensity of the game that I find absolutely captivating. The fighting, the crowd, just a mix of all of it."

"Hockey, you say?" Jack's eyes gleamed with unbridled enthusiasm. "Well, as it happens, I'm a bit of a hockey player myself. I actually play for the Jersey Devils as a defenseman."

Y/N's eyes widened in genuine surprise, her earlier nerves temporarily forgotten. "What! Well, tell me about it. Do you enjoy it?"

Jack chuckled, the rich sound sending a shiver down Y/N's spine. "Well, then I'd be more than happy to regale you with tales of my hockey exploits." He leaned in closer, his voice dropping to a conspiratorial whisper. "But only if you promise to share some of your own stories in return."

She extended her pinky, a silent invitation, waiting for him to entwine his with hers, sealing their promise in a tender gesture.

Jack gently raised his hand to the table, his eyes fixed on hers, as he tenderly entwined his larger pinky with hers, sealing their promise with a heartfelt gesture.

The two fell into an easy conversation, trading stories and sharing their passions. Y/N found herself captivated by Jack's easy charm and infectious enthusiasm, and before long, the lunch rush began to fill the coffee shop.

"Maybe I should let you get back to your day," Y/N said reluctantly, glancing around at the growing crowd, a twinge of disappointment tugging at her heart.

But Jack's eyes held a glimmer of pleading, and he reached across the table, his fingers brushing against hers in a gesture that sent electricity coursing through her veins.

"Or you could stay a little longer?" he suggested, his voice low and hopeful. "I'm quite enjoying our chat, and I'd hate for it to end so soon."

Y/N hesitated, her heart palpitating in its cage. This was all so unexpected, but there was something about Jack that made her want to throw caution to the wind.

Taking a deep breath, she offered him a shy smile, her nerves and excitement mingling in equal measure. "You know, I think I'd like that. And maybe, if you're free sometime, we could, um, grab dinner?"

Jack's face lit up with a dazzling smile. "I'd love nothing more," he said, quickly pulling out his phone. "Here, let me give you my number. I can't wait to take you out."

As Jack typed away, Y/N felt a surge of giddiness. This was all so new and exciting, and she couldn't help but wonder where this chance encounter might lead. One thing was certain, though – she was more than ready to find out.

Jack made her feel - seen, heard, and utterly captivated.

…

14:00 pm

I debated including this, but I felt so giddy and in love with writing I couldn’t help it. I’m just a sucker for some pure love.

***A gentle breeze caressed her face, carrying with it the scent of springtime The world around her seemed to burst with vibrant color - the lush, verdant hues of the trees, their leaves rustling softly in the breeze.

The myriad shades of pink and purple adorning the blooming flowers that lined the sidewalk, and the vast, azure sky overhead, dotted with wispy clouds that danced languidly across the heavens.

It was as if the entire city had been painted with a master's brush, each detail a testament to nature's radiant beauty.

Reaching into her bag, she pulled out her camera, her fingers trembling with excitement as she began to weave through the bustling streets.

In the nearby park, she captured the laughter of happy families, their faces aglow with pure, unadulterated joy as they swung gleefully on the playground or tossed a Frisbee back and forth, their movements fluid and carefree.

Further down the path, a lonely man sat on a bench, tossing a well-worn tennis ball to his faithful canine companion. As the dog bounded after it, his tail wagging furiously, a warm smile spread across the man's face, his eyes crinkling with a contentment that seemed to radiate outwards, touching all who witnessed the tender exchange.

Y/N couldn't resist the urge to capture these fleeting moments, her camera shutter clicking rapidly as she sought to preserve the beauty that surrounded her.

Every step she took seemed to reveal another breathtaking sight - a young couple sharing a picnic lunch on the lush, verdant grass, their bodies intertwined as they leaned into one another's embrace, and a group of elderly friends chatting animatedly on a park bench, their laughter carrying on the gentle breeze.

Each snapshot felt like a love letter to the world, Y/N's heart swelled with a sense of wonder, her steps light and airy as she continued her walk home.

With each snapshot she captured, she couldn't help but see the reflection of Jack in the scenes that unfolded before her.

The joyful laughter of the families in the park reminded her of the way Jack's eyes had crinkled with delight during their conversation. The lonely man's smile as he played with his dog mirrored the warmth and kindness that Jack had exuded so effortlessly.

And the tender embrace of the picnicking couple evoked the gentle way Jack's fingers had brushed against her own, sending electricity coursing through her veins.

It was as if the entire world had conspired to remind her of the captivating man she had just met, weaving his essence into the very fabric of her surroundings.

Y/N found herself wondering what she and Jack must have looked like, huddled together in the cozy coffee shop, their heads bent close as they shared stories and laughter like old friends.

The thought brought a smile to her lips, and she couldn't help but feel a sense of giddiness at the realization that this chance encounter had the potential to blossom into something truly special. Jack's colors had painted the world around her, and she couldn't wait to see what other hues he might bring into her life.***

…

14:30 pm

Y/N closed the door behind her, the solid wood frame pressing against her back as she leaned into it, letting out a deep, contented breath.

A smile slowly crept across her face, unbidden and unwilling, as she buried her face in her hands, momentarily overcome by the whirlwind of emotions swirling within her.

Slowly, almost reverently, her hands drifted down to her stomach, fingertips gently caressing the barely-there swell that held the promise of new life.

"Maybe this can be good for us," she murmured, her voice barely above a whisper, as if speaking the words aloud would somehow make them more real.

Suddenly, a flash of self-consciousness washed over her, and Y/N felt a flush of embarrassment creeping up her cheeks. Had she really just been giddily daydreaming like some lovestruck schoolgirl?

The moment of levity was short-lived, however, as a familiar voice broke the silence, cutting through the haze of her thoughts.

"You just gonna stand there and be weird, or are you gonna come sit down?" Heather said, a teasing lilt in her tone.

Y/N's head snapped up, a sheepish look crossing her features as she nodded and made her way to the couch, her steps tentative and uncertain. "Sorry, I, uh, I was just..." Her voice trailed off, unsure of how to even begin explaining the maelstrom of emotions that had overtaken her.

Heather watched her fondly, a knowing smile playing on her lips. "You're being strange today," she observed, her tone laced with affection. "But I can't say I'm surprised, considering what you told me earlier."

Y/N could feel the heat rising in her cheeks as she settled onto the cushions, her movements almost cautious, as if she were trying to contain the giddiness that threatened to spill out.

Unable to keep the grin from spreading across her face, she shook her head in a half-hearted attempt to downplay her excitement. "I know, I know," she said, the words tumbling out in a rush. "It's just... I haven’t felt this way in a long time and it’s exciting, you know?"

Heather chuckled, reaching out to give Y/N's hand a gentle squeeze, her eyes crinkling with warmth and understanding. "I can see that.”

…

19:47 pm

Later that night, Y/N ran her fingers lovingly over the smooth surface of her stomach, the gesture almost reverent as she finished her nightly cleansing routine.

Just as she set down her phone, the familiar chime of a new message caught her attention, and a giddy smile instantly blossomed on her face as she saw Jack's name on the screen.

Sinking into the soft cushions of the couch, Y/N eagerly opened the message, her heart fluttering with anticipation.

"Hey there, beautiful," Jack's text read, the words sending a flutter through Y/N's chest. "I was just thinking about you and that lovely smile of yours. How about we make it a date tomorrow night? I know this amazing little Italian place that I think you're going to love."

Y/N's fingers hovered over the screen, poised to type a response, but a twinge of hesitation gripped her. The news of her pregnancy weighed heavily on her mind, a secret that both excited and frightened her in equal measure.

She knew she should tell him, but doubt crept in, insidious and persistent. After all, she and Jack weren't even officially dating yet. Their relationship, while promising, was still new and undefined.

The thought of burdening him with this life-altering news so early on felt unfair, potentially derailing the tender connection they had begun to forge. What if the prospect of fatherhood sent him running?

Shaking off her doubts, Y/N decided to throw caution to the wind. "A date, huh? Well, you certainly know how to sweep a girl off her feet," she typed, adding a flirtatious wink emoji for good measure before hitting send.

Almost immediately, her phone chimed with Jack's response, and Y/N could practically hear the warmth and charm in his voice. "Only the best for my favorite writer," he replied, followed by a string of heart-eyed emojis. "I'll pick you up at 7 sharp. Dress to impress, beautiful."

Y/N couldn't help but grin, a giddiness bubbling up inside her. "It's a date," she replied, adding a playful wink emoji for good measure.

As she set her phone aside, Y/N couldn't help but marvel at the whirlwind of emotions coursing through her.

Just hours ago, she had been a bundle of nerves, unsure of how to navigate this newfound connection. But now, with Jack's invitation in hand, she felt a renewed sense of excitement and possibility.

Sure, the news of her pregnancy was daunting, but she couldn't help but wonder if, just maybe, this could be the start of something truly special.

After all, Jack had already shown himself to be a charming, attentive, and genuinely interested companion. Perhaps, with a little bit of courage, she could find the right moment to share this life-changing news with him.

…

Tag List <3

@fearfam69691 @alwaysclassyeagle, @rebelatbay, @dancerbailey3

@snailss, @dasiysthings, @shawnshoney

[sturniolo-rat]

Cake Eater’s Delight

Matt Sturniolo X Reader

A/N: here’s your anal fic as promised! I spent way too much time describing yoga positions. For this, I am extremely sorry.

Contains: smut, anal, oral, butt plugs

TW: BEARS! Also, the term "Butt Slut" You give me a simple request, and I will do the absolute most

Y/N is wearing yoga pants that accentuate her ass. Matt is intent on fucking it.

Today is self-care Sunday, and Y/N just finished making a strawberry banana smoothie with extra protein powder for her boyfriend, Matt. It’s seven a.m., and she has the whole day planned, but first, she has to get him up and ready.

“Wakey wakey, My sweet boy.” she chirps eagerly, holding the smoothie to his face. 

“Oh god.” he groans, wipes the sleep from his eyes, and sees how hyped Y/N is. Still very disoriented, he says, “I see you’re having a good morning, Baby, but what time is it?” 

“It’s seven a.m. and I’m super excited for our early morning nature walk!”  

He sits up and sighs. “The fuckin’ nature walk.” Matt was actually pretty enthusiastic about this last night when he agreed to it, but not so much this morning. It’s too early, and he just wants Y/N to come back and be the big spoon for the next two hours. The smoothie, however, is immaculate, and he made her a promise. He summons all of his strength and swings his legs over the side of the bed. He sits facing Y/N and says with a smile, “I’ve never been more pumped for anything in my life!” Y/N gives him a bone-crushing hug before skipping off to get him the outfit she picked for him yesterday. Matt can’t help but stare at her booty as she makes her way to the closet. Those damn yoga pants get him every time.  

Half an hour later, they arrive at the closest California state park. Matt is warming up to the idea of this walk. He really does love nature, and having a little stroll in it is certainly something he would do as self-care. “Maybe we’ll see a bear!” Y/N squeals. 

“I love bears. They're so fucking big and dumb.” He really does hope they see a bear. His excitement over seeing a dangerous animal in the wild isn’t his fault. He has a very serious condition called white man curiosity. Bless him and his family. 

As they walk the dirt trail, Matt tells her facts about all the animals and plants they encounter. At some point, the trail leads them to a very colorful part of the woods filled with flowers. The trail has slowly been getting narrower, so Matt is now walking behind Y/N. “Baby, If I sincerely told you that I accidentally body-swapped with my sister, would you believe me?”

He’s deeply confused by the question, but he has an answer for it, regardless. “I would probably ask you a question that only you could answer first.” he pauses to laugh at how silly she is. “Would you believe me?”

“Most definitely,” she responds with unnatural quickness.

Matt is taken aback. “Why so certain?”

“Well, now that we’ve had the conversation, I don’t think you’d say you were body-swapped unless it actually happened.”

He’s getting very invested in the conversation now. “I’m not worried about it because you only really get body-swapped with people you dislike. So I don’t think there’s any danger of this happening to me and my brothers.”

“I don’t hate my sister, but we are polar opposites, so I see body-swap potential.”

“Be careful not to get sucked into any body-swapping hijinks, My love.”

“I’ll try, but no promises.”

Suddenly, he grabs her arm and stops her in her tracks. Y/N turns around to look at him, but all she sees is a beautiful array of flowers. Matt had been behind her, picking a bouquet of flowers as they talked. He moves the flowers from in front of his face and hands them to Y/N. “It’s a thank-you gift. I truly am having an amazing time today.”

“This is insanely fucking sweet. Thank you so much, Baby.” She leans in to give him a soft peck on the cheek. “I think we should start heading back though. We’re getting kinda far out.” They had gotten lost in each other's company and didn’t notice that they had been walking for an hour and covered at least 2 miles of the 5-mile trail.

Matt tears his gaze from Y/N’s face to take in their environment. “Goddamn, we’re like way out in the fuckin wild!” He can tell Y/N is getting somewhat uncomfortable with the thought of being so deep in the woods, so he holds out his hand for her to take and starts to walk her back down the trail. 

Y/N lets go of his hand and taps him furiously on the shoulder. “Matt. Matt, it actually fucking happened. Look!” she whispers in his ear and points into the distance. 

“A bear!” Matt yells.

“Hush!” she hits him hard on the head. “Don’t be the idiot who gets killed because he screamed at a bear. Just get the camera out.”

He fumbles with his backpack but realizes he didn’t pack it. He was so sure they wouldn’t come across a bear. The pictures and videos he takes on his phone will have to do for their next vlog. Once Matt has all the bear material he needs, they continue down the dirt path, tip-toeing very quietly.

When they finally reach their car, they’re exhausted, sweaty, and gross. Matt, however, is also rocking a semi. He’s been walking behind Y/N for hours now, watching how her ass moves. They’ve just started experimenting with butt stuff recently. He’s been obsessed with her backside ever since. He can't get the image of the pink hello kitty butt plug sticking out of her ass out of his mind. The drive home is pleasant and gives him time to calm down. Matt doesn’t want his horniness to get in the way of the day Y/N has planned. 

They arrive home, and Y/N flops on their bed. The walk was way longer than it was supposed to be. She’s anxious to tell Matt about the next activity she has planned, but she needs a quick break to hydrate. Matt comes in clutch and brings her the Stanley cup she filled up that morning but forgot to bring. She sits up and takes the cup. “Thank,” she says as she takes a sip. “God!”

“Don’t thank God. Thank me, Honey.” he winks as she absolutely chugs her water. There’s water dripping from the sides of her mouth running down her neck and breasts. Fuck she can even make drinking like a feral caveman look sexy. When she finishes, she sets the cup down, and Matt’s dick jumps in his pants. She looks like she could be in a wet t-shirt contest. He’s really fighting for his life right now and needs an activity to distract himself. “Alright! Get up, Baby. It’s time for whatever’s next on the list.” He hopes it's something lame and calming like meditation or maybe some silly facial skin routine.

“Okay, I’ll go get the yoga mats and bring them to the living room.” She hops up from the bed, fully recharged and energetic as ever. “Oh, yay. I’m gonna bring my new yoga ball, too!”

“Oh, good!” he says quite insincerely. He should have seen this coming. She’s wearing the yoga pants she reserves for actually doing yoga. This is going to be torture. He tucks his boner into his waistband and waits for Y/N in the other room.      

When meets him there, she kicks her yoga ball into the corner and gives Matt a big hug before setting up their pink and blue yoga mats. She’s so happy to be spending the day relaxing and playing around with him. Her ponytail whips around behind her as she spins to face Matt. “Did you know it’s actually recommended that you do yoga or stretch after long walks? The walk wasn’t meant to be long, but how lucky it is that my plan works out.” She’s speaking extremely quickly due to her excitement.  She pauses for a breath but begins talking again before Matt can respond. “Are you ready?” she asks expectantly.

“Of course, My love. Your plan is perfect.” 

They stand on their respective mats, and Y/N realizes that Matt has probably never done yoga in his life. “Let me show you five poses you need to know before we start.” He takes a deep breath and prepares for a face full of outstretched booty, but to his surprise, she sits down crisscrossed. “We’re gonna start off with the Sukhasana. Just sit down, touch your pointer fingers to your thumbs, and close your eyes.” 

“Seems easy enough,” He says and patiently watches as she changes pose. 

“Then we’re gonna transition into the Adho Mukha Svanasana. Just get on your hands and knees,” she demonstrates as she talks. “Place your hands down in front of you, shoulder-width apart. Then walk your legs back so your hands are under your shoulders, and your knees are under your hips.”

“That’s a lot of words to explain what I believe is the very simple-looking downward-facing dog.” Yup. This is exactly what he expected. It’s awful and stressful, but it’s also absolutely fucking glorious. Her booty is a piece of art crafted specifically for him by the hands of God. He tears his eyes away and looks at her face as she once again, changes her pose. 

“Oh, shut up. I’m trying to sound like a yoga professional,” she says with a small chuckle. “Anyway, the next pose is the pigeon pose.”

“Yeah, super fancy and professional.” He smirks, and she rolls her eyes.

“Moving on!” she says, letting out an exasperated breath, “From the Adho Mukha Svanasana position, you’re gonna lift your left leg up while keeping your other leg straight and your foot arched.” 

“Jesus Christ,” Matt whispers loudly. The pose essentially looks like she’s throwing it back on the floor. Her bottom is round and cute, and all he wants to do is reach out and squeeze it. That’s a lie, actually. He wants to smack it. Hard, very fucking hard. He wants to grope her fat, meaty thighs and worship her body. She’s talking, but he can’t hear her. He’s in a trance, and he needs to do something about it. “I’m sorry, Sweetness. I really am, but I can’t keep it to myself anymore.”

Y/N gets up and looks at his face, very concerned. “What’s wrong, Baby?”

He still hasn’t looked up at her face. “It’s your ass.” He licks his lips. “I have to fuck it.”

Y/N moves so that she’s directly in front of him and grabs him by his jaw to make him look at her. She whispers in his ear, “I know.” Matt has been lusting after her all day. There was no possibility that she wouldn’t notice. "Time to destroy my root chakra."

“Fuck yes!” He pulls her into a rough, toothy kiss. His lips are soft, almost silken, and pillowy against hers. His hand reaches up to massage her breast, and she moans into his mouth. She needs him. Needs to see more of him. Y/N tugs at the hem of his shirt. Matt takes the hint, breaks the kiss, and removes it. She puts her hands on his chest and rubs them down his abdomen. He’s so beautiful. 

In one swift motion, he wipes her hands away. She whimpers and gives him a pathetic, needy look. “I know you want to touch me, Baby. I know.” He says as he makes his way over to get the yoga ball. “But right now, I need you to bend over this ball and show me that pretty, pretty ass of yours.” 

Y/N does as she’s told. She loves it when Matt bosses her around. He pulls at her pants aggressively, and she doesn’t understand what he’s trying to do. Then she hears a tearing sound and feels the cold air on her bare bottom. “You just ripped my favorite yoga pants!”

“Quiet!” He barks. “I’ll get you new ones.” He says as he forces her panties down around her knees. His hands part her cheeks, and he can’t believe what he sees. He has been lusting after this woman all fucking day, thinking he was being a pervert. Little did he know that Y/N had her butt plug in the whole time. He takes a closer look. It’s not her favorite Hello Kitty one, but the one with the blue jewel on the end. Matt’s eyes widened; it’s their second biggest one. Y/N anticipated this, and she always comes prepared. 

He kneads both of her cheeks as he asks, “Oh, Sweet girl, did you plan this? Was this part of your little self-care day? Did you need to be a little butt slut for me to feel complete?”

“I do.” She whines. “Last night, I got so horny thinking about you playing with my ass.”

“I can tell, Sweetheart. You used the big blue one. We’ve never even touched that one before. Were you training your ass for me?” He sits on his knees behind her so his face is level with her rear. Matt takes his time biting and kissing her ass. She lets out a hiss when he starts to play with the plug, pulling it out only to put it back in again. Every little movement has her gasping. He keeps going until she’s too loose for the stretch. He slaps her on the ass with so much force he leaves a handprint, and she lets out a wail. 

“I know we haven’t done it before, but do you want to take my cock?” he asks.

“I want to try,” she says in a shaky voice.

“Are you sure?”

“I am. I swear.”

“I promise I’ll be gentle, but first,” He shoves his pants and boxers down and takes his cock in his hand as he walks around to Y/N’s front. “I need you to lube up my cock. Can you do that for me, Baby?”

“Mhmm, I can.” She replies eagerly and opens wide. 

Her mouth is wet and warm around his cock. He holds her hands behind her back so she has to deep-throat him to reach his base. The dirty, sloppy sounds coming from his thrusts in and out of her throat are music to his ears. He needs to hear more. He grabs her by the ponytail and fucks her face harder. He wants to hear her choke and gag. She doesn’t mind it. She’s just happy to be of service. Her mouth is so fucking perfect, but he needs to stop before he cums. He pulls out, and she gasps for air. “You okay? Catch your breath, Baby.” He gives Y/N time to orient herself. 

“I’m okay.” She gives him a big smile. Only sluts smile like that after choking on cock.

“If you want me to stop at any point, just tell me, and I'll stop.”

Y/N nods her head, and Matt takes his spot behind her. He pulls the butt plug out very carefully and sets it aside. Her pussy is so wet and leaking, but he ignores it entirely, except to say, “You’re dripping down your thighs, My love.” he smiles to himself as he taps his cock on her ass. “You’re soaking your new exercise ball,” he says as he slowly pushes his tip in. When he finally pushes in past his tip, it burns and hurts, but she loves the sensation. She keeps thinking that it can’t get any longer, but it just keeps going, and the stretch burns until, eventually, he gives her all of him. Her asshole clenches hard, and it feels so fucking amazing, but then it’s burning and hurting right at the entrance, and she whimpers as he pulls himself out halfway. He’s going so slow, and he wants to speed up so badly. Her asshole feels so much better than he imagined it would. He knew she would be tight, but he didn’t know how deep she could take him. She can’t fit him all the way in when he fucks her pussy. It feels so nice to be able to give her everything he’s got. 

“You can go faster now.”

“Oh, yes.” he bites his lip and speeds up to a respectable pace. 

“No, faster. I need it faster,” she says desperately. He picks up the pace, and finally, he starts to feel like he’s properly fucking her. She’s moaning and whining because it feels so bad and so good at the same time. It’s a very confusing sensation, but all she knows is she wants to cum so badly. Usually, Matt likes to make Y/N cum first, but he doesn’t know if anal will make her cum, and he just can’t resist cumming in her ass. He stands her up so she’s up against his chest and reaches in front of her to rub her clit. This is what she needs, what she’s been missing. He loves the sounds she’s making. He doesn’t even notice he’s been drilling into her faster and faster. Y/N is letting out loud yelps with every thrust. If anyone overheard them, they would think she was in agony. 

“I’m gonna cum, Baby. I want you to try to cum with me. Can you do that?” he says, breathing heavily.

“I can try.”

“What do you need, Love? How can I help you cum?” 

“Please pull my hair.” His hands are around her ponytail before she can even get all the words out. He pulls so hard she’s forced to look up at the ceiling. 

“Like that?”

Her eyes are rolling to the back of her head. “Fuck, yes! Just like that! I’m gonna cum!” 

Matt puts more pressure on her clit and feels her cumming. It feels different from when he’s in her pussy. The thought of having had every one of her holes pushes him to the edge, and he releases himself into her asshole. 

Y/N’s knees buckle, and she collapses onto the exercise ball and pants. He wants to ask her if she’s alright, but he’s distracted watching his cum leak out of her ass. “Fuck,” he leans over to pick he up bridal style. “Let's get you into a bath, okay?”

“You’re not gonna believe this, but that’s actually next on the list.”

“Perfectly planned, My love.”

Masterlist

@rafecameronsbitch @daddyslilchickenfingers2 @mrsmiagreer @lovergirl4387 @gdsvhtwa @ashley9282828 @j-worlds-blog @stephanienwf @achrisgirly @draculaura123 @abbypost @Cind2224 @crazychrisl0v3r @ryli3sworld @bkwrld @pinkishpearls @pepsienthusiasts @stunza @chrattstromboli @sturnssmuts @angelic-sturniolos111 @69isabella69 @maryx2xx @sturniolo04 @bigbeefybitch @klaus223492 @r93339 @sturnzsblog @spotconlon55 @robins-scoop @junovrsmp4 @sturnlover4eva @blahbel668 @lilahnowheretobefound @luxy-nyx @tuffsturns @m0r94n @sturnstvs @pepsicolapussy333 @maddyslifesstuff @dogblof @honeymoonxxz @xplr-sturns-e-m @hayhjelmstad15 @thetriplets3 @y0urm4m @mattyblover07

[strawberryspence]

this one's for my cassie banana (@henderdads) who wanted a HAPPY grammy related ficlet. but because i wrote it, of course there's going to be a tiniest hint of angst. 🙄 ily and i hope this satisfies ur craving 💗🌷🏆

-

As a gay, rock star in the late 90's, Eddie's had to keep his and Steve's relationship under the wraps. He's had to sing songs and change the pronouns from he to she.

In his heart, he knows Steve doesn't mind, knows that he understands that this is the life his boyfriend chose. But Eddie hates it, hates that he can't scream on top of his lungs, on top of the highest mountains, that he loves Steve Harrington and he, miraculously, loves him back.

As Eddie stares at the wall of awards in front of him, he thinks— knows— that not one of these gold, silver, bronze awards mean as much as Steve means to him. No award is as important as the love of his life.

People still remember the Grammy Awards on 2001. No, it's not because of the famous singers. No, it's not because of the performances. No, it's not because of their outfits.

It's because the singer-songwriter of rock band, Corroded Coffin, won their fifth grammy award and what they thought was a normal award speech would change the course of the industry.

Eddie walks up alone, accepts the award and smiles.

"Well, the band— Gareth, Jeff and Grant— has trusted me enough to do this speech without fucking it up." He laughs as he hugs the award closer to his chest.

"Thank you to the recording academy, our managers and our label, for the last 10 years. The last 10 years has been crazy and amazing and surreal. But just this morning," Eddie takes a deep breath, "We— Me and the members of the Corroded Coffin— has decided to move labels. Somewhere we'll be free to express ourselves and be out true colorful selves."

"So yeah, thank you for them and the chance. But this award," Eddie holds it up, "Is for every gay kid who was scared and who thought they were alone. It's for every gay kid who thought they will never, ever get to express themselves and thought they'll have to hide forever."

The audience starts cheering, people clapping and standing as Eddie smiles, bulldozes on, "This grammy is for little Eddie Munson, Gareth Emerson, Jeff Best and Paul Grant. Four gay kids, in the middle of Hawkins, Indiana, just finding each other. We're Corroded Coffin and we're the proof that you could also be free and true to yourself."

"To my boyfriend. Yes, my boyfriend. Every she in every song I wrote was originally an he. Every word and tune was meant to be for you. Sweetheart, baby, you are my whole heart. Steve Harrington, I fucking love you. This fucking grammy is for you."

He holds up the award as he starts walking back to the back of the stage. The people in the crowd give him a standing ovation.

Somewhere in New York, there's a boy, who once survived death himself, smiling and beaming so hard it hurts his jaw. He'll call Eddie later, and thank him for what he's done for people like them. He'll sleep peacefully, knowing that a few kids will sleep better tonight, knowing that everything is going to be okay.

Somewhere in LA, there's a girl, sitting on the couch with a cold champagne and confetti in her hands, waiting for Eddie and Steve to come home. She'll kiss both their cheeks, happy to have them both home. They'll drink, cheer and celebrate being out to the whole world.

But before that, just behind the curtains, a man is waiting for him, with the biggest smile on his face and tears streaming down his face.

Eddie greets him with a smile, and an earth shattering kiss on the lips.

"I am proud of you." Steve says, and Eddie melts in his touch.

"I can sing with boy pronouns now. I am going to be so insufferable." Eddie laughs.

"You go do that, be what the world needs." Steve laughs, hooking his arms with his boyfriend, walking deeper in to backstage.

"What about what you need?" Eddie asks, looking at the man beside him, the one who saved him and who's still saving him.

Steve smiles, holding Eddie's free hand and intertwining it. There's people walking around them, but they're in their own little world. For the first time, they're not hiding.

Steve holds up Eddie's hand, "I've got everything I need right here."

[woso-dreamzzz]

Big Adventures Thoughts

So, my fics were pretty short tonight because I was stuck on a coach for six hours and couldn't write much but I do have some random Big Adventures thoughts that may or may not make it into fics at some point but I'm just going to share them all with you now 😊

I've mentioned it very briefly in an ask before but when Princesse was very young she spoke Swedish with a slight Danish accent and Magda hated it. It faded after she started living with Magda but it's always funny to Pernille whenever anyone brings it up

It's not been used a lot but moster Frido is a big part of Princesse's life. This is coming in a fic soon but after the doctors and Magda and Pernille, she's actually the next person to hold Princesse and she's the one that brings her girl-swan and girl-moose when she's a baby. Princesse adores her in the way all young girls idolise their older, female relatives and Frido's definitely the one she turns to when she's older and doesn't want to talk to her mums about certain things

Magda feels a bit inadequate sometimes (particularly early on) when she finds out just how easy Pernille and Princesse work together on things and it's a pretty steep learning curve for her but she adapts pretty quickly

Every shirt Princesse gets when she's younger, she wears to bed the night she gets it. Some shirts (like Leah's) she hoards for weeks before letting them get washed and framed if she thinks they're special enough

Princesse is deathly allergic to kiwi, banana and avocado but only slightly allergic to latex

Sometimes on the bus to away games, Princesse curls up on Jessie's lap and naps with her. Pernille has a whole photo album of pictures of Jessie and Princesse napping

The gloves that Zećira gives Princesse after the match against the USA, Princesse keeps. It becomes a bit of a superstition but before every match, she puts them on and then takes them off to put on her own gloves because she wants Zećira's good luck from that game to rub off on her

Princesse is absolutely a prodigy at keeping. Magda and Pernille debate sometimes whether there must be some kind of keeper dna in the donor they chose (because it certainly didn't come from Magda's) or whether or not it was the near hero worship Princesse has for Zećira that made her want to prove herself

Princesse's schooling ends up being a bit all over the place. She only starts school when they all move back to Germany and she only really goes in a few times a week because Magda and Pernille's schedules can be erratic sometimes and it's a bit easier to home-school her (and because of the slight separation anxiety Magda develops but will forever deny). When Magda and Pernille retire and they end up in Sweden, Princesse's time is taken up by academy training and then when she hits fifteen, professional training so she ends up taking online school

I think I've mentioned this as well but Princesse never lets in a penalty her entire career and it makes other players all the more nervous during penalty shootouts at major tournaments because she continually blocks them. It becomes kind of a thing that commentators at matches talk about in the 'is this the day someone finally scores a penalty against her' kind of way

Like Magda did, Princesse gives away her World Cup medals but this time to Magda and Pernille rather than a child of her own

Almost all of Princesse's World Cup jerseys get given away to players from her childhood (if and when she defeats their teams) while the others go to Magda and Pernille

For club football, Princesse has her first name on her back but for every international match, it's her last name

Princesse feels awkward getting praise sometimes from people that aren't her mothers which is something that carries into adulthood so, at award shows and such things, she always brings them with her because it makes her feel less awkward

Speaking of award shows, Princesse is presented with awards by both Mary Earps when she grows up along with Alexia and Aitana

[junekissed]

what svt would dress their kids as for halloween

member | dad!ot13 genre | headcanons, humor, fluff word count | 400 warnings | children below the cut (?), most of the babies are white i'm sorry it was super hard to find ones that weren't but don't pay attention to the kids they're just there to show the costumes! notes | all photos are from pinterest! this is based on a conversation i had with @duhnova earlier hehe :) comment which costume is your fav!

seungcheol - pumpkin

he would spend so long looking online for the cutest one. he'd probably want to do a pumpkin patch themed photoshoot to go along with it

jeonghan - lion

honestly i think he just went to spirit halloween at the last minute and picked out the silliest one he could find. fortunately for you they were out of the avocado costumes

joshua - grandma/grandpa

i think he would just get such a kick out of it. he would bring them to your parent's house and he would make those stupid jokes that waiters do when babies eat at restaurants like "oh no margaritas for her, she's driving" or handing the check to the baby "dinner's on him tonight"

junhui - elephant

i have no reasoning for this one just a gut feeling tbh. he would probably like the big floppy ears. and also the fact that you told him if he dressed up your kid as a cat for the 3rd year in a row, you would throw the costume away (you wouldn't but you had to get him to change somehow)

hoshi - tiger

do you even have to ask. your baby has been wearing tiger onesies since they left the hospital

wonwoo - ladybug

i think he would think the little red and black spots are so cute :( he would be a very soft dad

woozi - shark

he probably has a demo version of a remix of the baby shark song on his computer. he would be dressed as an octopus or a fish or something and he would pretend he hates it but he would secretly think it's funny

mingyu - giraffe

he's manifesting for your baby to grow up to be tall like him a giraffe

minghao - skunk

again i don't know why i think this i just do. the black and white seems very minghao to me

seokmin - chicken

he would insist you have the cutest baby in the neighborhood and he would just be grinning and giggling the whole time. look at those little orange feet aren't they so precious. he would dress up as a farmer and carry around a basket of plastic eggs

seungkwan - monkey

he would dress up as a banana. also probably makes jokes "there better not be any monkey business tonight"

vernon - pineapple

i'm just laughing thinking about vernon holding a baby dressed like a pineapple

chan - bat

he would want to do a halloween-y costume and he thinks the little wings are cute. might dress up as a vampire to match

i hope you enjoyed this!! if you did, consider reblogging or leaving a comment or an ask :) it shows me this is something people want to see more of, and knowing people like this makes me want to write more of it! thanks for reading!!

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[volturiprincess]

Felix volturi with a mate who is type 1 diabetic? I’m really struggling with my diabetes rn and I could use some fluff from my favorite strong man🥺

Him

Felix Volturi x Type 1 diabetic reader

A/N: I hope this gives you the fluff you need, and I hope you are doing better 🫶🏼🥺. I might not know what you are going through but I believe in you . I'll be honest Im not super familiar with this but I have some understanding (currently in school going going for a degree in the medical field actually). But enjoy 💙

(The handsome gentle giant❤️)

“Morning my little rose”

At the sound of my mate's voice, I opened my eyes slowly to be welcomed by his handsome face. He’s so beautiful. He reached a hand out to caress my cheek gently, pure heaven right there with just his touch. I love his gentleness considering how tall and muscular he is it is hard to consider him this with his status as the ‘executor’ of the Volturi, but to me he is so tender and loving.

Still feeling a bit sleepy I responded with a soft “Morning Fe”

He joined me on the bed and pulled me into his arms so my head was resting on his chest. Today was one of those days where I had no energy to do anything. I just want to lay in bed all day and sleep. I sometimes hate feeling like this, I don't like showing Felix this side of me, even if he knows about my diagnosis. I did tell him a bit of what I go through and stuff but it's a struggle sometimes.

“You're having one of those days aren't you?”

I guess he already knows. It's been about 6 months since Felix came into my life and I was told he is my mate. But I have had type 1 for about 2 years already. The only reason he found out was he came to visit me in my house when I was feeling absolutely terrible, he thought I was sick with the flu but I told him the truth. He was very understanding and Demetri told me the next day that Felix spent the whole night reading anything there is to know about how to deal and manage with type 1. And since then my love for him bloomed more. 

“Yea it’s one of those days unfortunately”

“Alright well good thing the masters gave me the day off, i'll be your personal nurse today”

Looking up at him with a lopsided smile and booping his nose with my finger tip

“My handsome vampire nurse to exact”

—------------

Since that morning, Felix has helped with taking a nice bubble bath with my favorite bath bomb that smells like roses and lavender. He even made me an appropriate breakfast, he's managed to get me to enjoy eating cantaloupe over the past couple of months. He's still struggling to get me to eat a banana alone because whenever I chew that fruit I gag and there were times where I did throw up from that weird texture. But he does make me smoothies with that fruit which I do enjoy. And now he is pursuing me into going on a walk with him in the gardens

“Come on cara, if you do get tired, which I understand does happen, we will take a break and I will give you a taste of the Felix care package when you're tired, hmmm?”

To top it off he finished that line with his shark like grin that always makes me weak in the knees. It's impossible to say no to him when he mentions his care package, it includes a massage, hair stroking, and small kisses on every inch of exposed skin that I dare show. 

“Fine, only because I heard that the garden was worked on recently and there are new flowers that I need to see up close but-”

“I got it here already, see?”

I looked at his other side and he had a bag which I can assume had some treats to help with the fatigue and nausea and in his hand he was holding what I can say is the biggest water bottle I have ever seen. 

“What the hell Felix, where did you manage to get such a huge water bottle?”

“I have my ways amore”

He wrapped his large muscular arm around my waist and guided me to the much awaited gardens. As soon as we were close to the gardens I felt myself relax and was surrounded by the smell of different flowers. I picked up on the sweetness of jasminess, the freshness of lavender with a hint of spice which I can assume were the lilies. We walked for a while until I started to feel a bit more weak and my thirst levels increased. Felix as always picked it up and we stopped at a nearby bench that he actually carved many centuries ago. He held the water bottle for me as I drank what I felt was a whole gallon in one sip. 

“Want to hear the story about his bench, amore?”

Not wanting to speak or nod my head from the slowly approaching headache, I gave him a thumbs up that was received by a small smile from him 

“Well I told you some bits of my gladiator days from what I can remember until Aro found me and turned me in. I picked up a hobby soon after I was turned. I always thought the arts were a fascinating topic, and with Master Caius' influence, I focused on sculpting. My first couple of attempts were not ... .good” he smiled with an  embarrassed look “ With my state of being more abnormally stronger as a newborn handling small tools in my large hands to carve ... .well you can already guess my issue. With this bench it took many attempts to master, I would switch between a variety of chiseling tools until I noticed just using my hands worked best, so I actually built this with my bare hands, I wanted to add a bit of architecture inspiration from the Colosseum, which is why the legs of this are like that.”

The way he explained his story was so adorable, some of the things I picked up about Felix is when he talks about something he is passionate about he gets a twinkle in his eyes. He smiles more than he already does but the way he explains things he went through makes me feel like I was there with him as the events happened. I soon noticed after his story my headache was gone. 

“Fe, can I tell you something?”

“Always my little rose”

“I don't tell you this enough but I really do appreciate you, I love that you are in my life, I thought I would become a burden to you but with you, you make me feel so special and loved, I love you my handsome giant”

I never said the L word to him so this was a first for him to hear.

“Oh cara, I think I just fell in love with you all over again, just hearing you say that makes my undead heart flip, with you I feel complete with as what is left my humanity, I love you mi amore”

Damn that giant, some small tears of happiness rolled down my cheeks which he wiped away with his thumb. He leaned in and placed a light kiss on my forehead that can speak thousands of words. 

[scientia-rex]

Something so weird about how big my "I'm just frustrated at how many people willfully misinterpret my annoyingly popular post" became another popular (for me. I have low standards) post where people go "I can't BELIEVE you're not SPECIFICALLY ADDRESSING EVERY SINGLE CONCERN I HAVE" and also people telling me I don't know how to read research or I'm misrepresenting it. Ok bitch! a) I know what I know, so I know I read research just fine. Product labels, no. I was horrified to realize that I'd bought strawberry MILK at the boba place, because somehow I thought some kind of non-milk strawberry milk would instead be the drink base. So lactose intolerant. So much regret. b) It's possible to make reasonable arguments, but you're not doing it. So far I have had a couple of people go "that research doesn't count!" and a whole ONE PERSON even bothered to link ONE SOURCE. I'm like come ON!!!!! I was in GRAD SCHOOL! I love a good academic throwdown! Saying shit like "your theory lacks credible basis" HAS to come from someone with more street cred than a tiny little avatar of Rick and/or Morty. I am giving you a BAD GRADE IN ADVERSARY, something that is normal to hate and possible to avoid. c) If you're going to be a dick, you realize I'm just gonna block you, right? Like, I've said it before, I'll say it again, engagement is a curse and a prison, I just want to be left alone with my 4 fandom friends to rot, all y'all grouped around the edges of this campfire watching me better NOT BE WEIRD ABOUT THIS.

Work today was bananas and I came home, took one third of an edible, and ate Bagel Bites. I'm almost 40 years old and I'm arguing with teens on the Internet on a work night and I love my life. Also, I have two dogs on the couch next to me and I'm sitting under a blanket with art of dogs wearing Halloween costumes. My life RULES. If you could have told 14-year-old me what this future was like, she would have been horrified by my body, but otherwise pretty into it. (Fatphobia gets beaten into us starting so, so young.)

[imnameimswrld]

003 ━━ 𝐁𝐢𝐫𝐭𝐡𝐝𝐚𝐲𝐬 & 𝐀 𝐁𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐤𝐮𝐩 ,,

"You are beating me !" Charles yells in disbelief, hands shooting up to right the slipping tiara from his hair. "How are you beating me, child ?"

Mattie's only answer is a maniacal laugh, eyes trained on the screen in pristine concentration, hands gripping the simulator steering wheel like he's been a driver for his whole ten years of living.

"Maybe because you're too busy fixing your crown, princess." I chuckle from my seat on the beanbag behind them, sipping my orange juice.

"It keeps slipping !"

"Yeah and at least the child was smart enough to use the pins it came with." I counter, watching as the race comes to an end, Mattie's screen flashing the number one, Charles frowning in second.

"Bananas...wait," he twists in my leather chair, leaning away to meet my gaze. "It came with pins ?"

"Sure did."

Just to confirm his confusion, Mattie gets up to skip around in victory, his tiara perfectly stable on his head the whole time. Even falling into Carlos's lap and getting attacked with birthday tickles from the Spaniard wasn't enough to even tilt the bejeweled thing.

"But I didn't find any with mine."

Charles looks like a kicked down puppy as he stands, removing the tiara from his head to inspect it. I want to laugh, but it feels wrong because he genuinely looks so sad.

"Oh, these pins ?"

At the voice everyone's head turns in unison, finding Lando entering the living room from the balcony, his fingers holding up a little plastic packet with, well, the tiara pins. First annoyance flashes across Charles' face, his eyes narrowed at the shorter man, a cheshire grin on his lips.

Then, then he just looks sad all over again.

Sighing, I set my solo cup down on the coffee table before standing.

"Lando, it's Charles' birthday, and you're being mean," I scold in a voice I only ever use with Mattie – but barely. I hate feeling like his parent. "So please give it back."

Like a child however, as if he didn't just turn twenty-six, Charles crosses his arms with a petulant frown on his face. I wish I could say all this was strange behavior, Lando being a little menace, Charles sulking like a toddler – but alas, it's just another day in my life.

"Lando."

"Come and get them, birthday boy."

"Can I help ? I'm a birthday boy too !" Mattie sits up with speed in Carlos' hold, eyes beginning to twinkle at yet another challenge.

Damn, this kid grows to be more and more like myself everyday. It is incredibly frightening.

"No, no, you stay put," Lando's grin falters when his gaze switches to the little human. "You're a child, and one of which I am very afraid of."

Carlos snorts in his seat, hands ruffling through Mattie's forest of curls.

"Lando, two steps from me and I'll have you in my hold before you can even turn to run." I smirk, arms crossing over my chest.

Lando rolls his eyes, shooting me a narrow gazed look. "Yeah, which is why I'm challenging Charles, not you. Can we just drop the two-for-one for like, five minutes please ? Like you two-"

It seems Charles has grown tired of Lando's rambling, because in a flash he's tossed the plastic accessory the chair before racing towards Lando. The Brit stutters for a moment, but finds his feet in time, and is able to just escape Char's grab. The two break into a game of chase around the house, hurdling over furniture like my house is an action move set.

"Parkour !" Lando blurts out when he successfully jumps over my coffee table for the third time.

As amusing as this whole show is, it was getting late, and the last thing I need is Mattie getting all hyped up like he is right now as he watches Lando yet again slip from Char's reaching fingers.

I'm just about to call their attention, when a knock sounds through the room. My gaze cuts to the front door, eyeing it in confusion. It could just be Celina coming to pick Mattie up since the guys and I are heading to the club for Char's birthday. Yet, as I approach, dodging the two men that are still playing cops 'n robbers in my living room, there's an unsettling feeling stirring in my gut.

Please, let it be Celina and not...

" Hey, amore mio. "

A thick frost grows over my insides, hand curling tightly over the doorknob. I imagine the door could even be shaking slightly under the severe anger that courses through my body as I stare into a pair of familiar grey eyes.

Before anyone else could notice his presence, because Dio forbid Carlos catches sight of him, I push him away so there's space for me to step out and shut the door behind me.

"Micah," I say in a low voice. "What the fuck are you doing ?"

He has the nerve to plaster a sweet smile on his lips, choosing to ignore the evident pissed off look in my eyes.

"Mi sei mancato, amore mio," he makes to step closer, but on beat, I take one back. "I just had a difficult couple weeks, but I'm back now."

He missed me ? Is he being for real right now ?

"If you missed me, stronzo, then why haven't you been answering when I text or call, mhm ?"

Micah looks up into my eyes with a flurry of emotions swirling around his. Too much to count. Too many I'd rather not name – but there's one that outshines all the others. Cowardice.

His mouth opens to undoubtedly lie, so I'm quick to make him rethink his next words.

"Humour me, Mic. Spin your best lie," I seethe, jaw clenched painfully hard. "I dare you."

That cowardice, in the blink of an eye, turns to a look of irritation. He clicks his tongue, lips snarling as he regards me with darkening eyes.

"You know what ? I'm sick of you hounding me about my whereabouts. I'm struggling, okay ? Which is something you know shit about-"

With the increase in volume of Micah's voice, I'm quick to grab him by the collar, my words coming out in an almost unrecognizable growl.

"Quiet. I don't need anyone knowing you're here right now."

A flash of hurt crosses his face as he pushes away, nostrils flaring as his gaze cuts from mine to stare down the empty hallway. There's an uncomfortable silence that sits in the air around us, my skin prickled with little thorns that are begging for me to just turn and leave this situation that I truly do not want to be in. Today has been such a good day – until now.

"You have no right to say I don't know what it is to struggle, and you know it."

Keeping my voice low, I fight back the tears that threaten to line my eyes. Micah and I were friends before lovers, and so he knows exactly how much hell I went through in the last few years; and yes, his life hasn't been easy either, but I was there for him when he needed me.

When I need him though... he'd always disappear.

"I've been there for you, Micah. When nonna passed, who was there for you ?" I speak quietly, struggling to keep my voice even.

"Stop."

"Me, I was there," I continue, ignoring his weak request. "And when you fell into a pit of depression because of it, I was the one who carried you home from bars, wasted and crying."

Micah has tears slowly running down his tan cheeks, hands balled up into whitening fists. "That's n-not fair, Nio."

I release a breath, face falling in disbelief at his words. I bring a shaky hand up to my chest, pressing my warm palm to my heart, wishing I could soothe the ache there. I may not have gotten far enough to love Micah, but I sure as hell care immensely for him.

"Not fair ? You can't be serious right now, Micah," I shake my head slowly, a tear slipping down at the motion. "Because when I sat, alone, with my mother who was in a coma for four months, were you there ?"

Micah says nothing as he eyes stare into mine. He has nothing to defend himself with here, and he knows it.

"You weren't even there for the good moments, Micah. That was the least you could do." I inhale sharply, willing the rest of the tears to not fall. He doesn't deserve it. He wasn't there for most of them in the past, so he doesn't get to have them now. He doesn't get to have them ever.

"I came to some of your races."

"Yeah," I scoff out. "And everytime you were joking around with every possible person on the grid, except for your boyfriend who only ever wanted your sincere support."

I can tell he's fighting back a sob with how hard he presses his lips together, his now charcoal grey eyes clouded with regret. It's too late for that however, he can try to apologize, but I'll just tell him to take it with him on his way out from my life.

"I think it's best you leave, Micah." I say, blinking the rest of my tears away as I break our gaze, fighting off the little voice in my head that's telling me to at least grace him with a hug goodbye.

"Leave ?" his voice is broken and soft, but not pleading. "Per sempre ?"

We both knew this was coming. He knows he's reached the expiry date for his chances, and there's no restocking them.

"Si, per sempre, Micah."

He takes a few steps back, and with each one I can feel myself able to breath a little easier. I can feel the weight lighten. The air become less tense – but my heart only aches more. I hate that he's able to hurt me so deeply.

"Antonio-"

The door opening from beside me has both our gazes breaking away to eye the body in the doorway now. My eyes meet my favourite blues, but there's a darkness in them, one I've rarely ever seen.

"Micah ?" Charles' voice drops to an octave I've never heard before. He begins stepping closer, but I'm quick to stop him with my hand wrapping gently around his wrist.

I now Charles would never do anything I didn't want him to, so he doesn't fight for release when I pull him back. His back bumps into my chest, and I find myself unconsciously inhaling his musky cologne, the familiar aroma placing an almost tranquil feeling over me.

"I assume you are leaving, yes ?" although phrased as a question, everything in his tone was implying it is anything but.

Charles isn't a scary guy. He's the most golden retriever human there is – but when he's pissed, it is insanely unsettling.

Micah's stares at Charles for a second longer, before bouncing back to me. At the switch I can feel Charles tense in front of me, and I imagine if I were shorter, he'd try and hide me. The thought is almost enough to bring a small smile to my lips.

There's nothing left to say, and since Micah lives in Italy, I trust I won't ever be seeing his face again. It's not like he's an F1 fan anyway.

"Arrivederci, Antonio."

With a short nod to me, Micah turns, and thank Dio for the elevator opening in that very moment. He waits for the people to exit before he's entering without a glance back, and the second the doors shut, I feel this sense of freedom raining down on me.

I breath out a heavy sigh, suddenly feeling annoyed at myself for getting so emotional. I start wiping the already drying tears from my cheeks.

"Hey," Charles has twisted around to stare up at me, his eyes back to that crystal blue I adore so much. "We don't have to go out tonight."

I laugh softly, not missing his tiara back on his head. It looks stable too, so he either got ahold of Lando, or Mattie took matters into his own hands.

"Seriously ? You'd give up a sick club party for ice-cream on the couch and White Chicks ?"

Charles snorts out, bringing up a hand to push some of my hair from my forehead. "Please, I love ice-cream on the couch and White Chicks, and you know it."

I chuckle, my head nodding in agreement. I do know that, because it's our thing I guess. Ice-cream on the couch and classic comedies. Charles smiles up at me, and soon I'm mirroring it when he pulls me down into a tight embrace, his hands wrapping around my waist. I feel his thumbs rub soothing patterns on my back, and I can slowly feel the pain in my chest lift. Being around him always makes things easier.

"Nah, let's go out."

He pulls away only slightly, just enough to meet my clear gaze. "You sure ?"

"Positive." I say truthfully, smiling as I steal a peck to his forehead that has him stumbling away with a feigned look of disgust. "Happy birthday, Char."

Charles looks slightly flustered from my tactic of affection from earlier, and it only makes me chuckle in amusement.

" Release me child !"

My head snaps towards the half shut door at the sudden cry, before I'm slowly raising a brow in Char's direction.

He smiles sheepishly. "Uh, last thing I heard before leaving was Teo offering to show Lando the new moves he learnt in jujitsu."

My eyes widen just as another cry for help reaches my ears, followed by a deep laugh laced with amusement. In a flash both Char and I are racing to little Lando's rescue.

[lovingdabeessss]

i will keep that in mind. Tbh, I've actually started writing right after I asked if I could. I just kept taking breaks because horrible attention, and I was stuck in Blake's part until last night. Now I'm kinda stuck on the Blacksmith's part. I have no idea how to write them... Though I have started writing their part, it is somewhat slow going, because of unfamiliarness with the character and irl stuff like tests.

On an unrelated note. Can we talk about the fucking symbolism?? Parallels??? Between Yang's death in this au and Ruby's in canon??

Because in Ruby's eyes. Yang, who did nothing wrong, who did not indanger their team, was the reason for a *kingdom* falling, didn't cause Penny's *death*. Had chosen to ascend and come back as someone else.

Whereas *Ruby*, who *did* do all of those things, at least in Ruby's eyes, chose to *not* ascend and came back as herself!!

Can you tell I love these fictional sisters?

FUCK YEAH PARALLELS!!!!!!!!!

She has none of the reasons ruby decided to go to the tree and yet she’s the one who ended up gone

CRAZZYYYYYY

For the blacksmith thing I say make them as unsettling as possible go bananas do something crazy

Yang is so interesting in the sense of her motivation is more people based like she didn’t come out post v3 to save the world she left to go help Ruby and that just happened to be what they were doing and Yang goes 100% because that’s just how she is like of course she’s helping people what else would she be doing kinda thing

When she thought she was dead at the beginning she didn’t seem particularly upset about it she just was there was nothing else to do anymore she’s done she fulfilled her little life’s purpose of protecting Ruby and saving people along the way and she’s done now time to look for all the people who she knows who died or something

She was DEEPLY upset when the rest of her team was dead for obvious reasons especially because stopping Ruby from dying was WHY SHE DIED but whatever moving on

I think Yang sees living as a never ending list of things to do and people to love so she’s always doing something and caring about someone like her whole life she was taking care of Ruby then in beacon she was helping Blake and along the way she was working to be a huntress which came easy to her and it was all good then she was looking for Ruby and then she was defeating Salem (which she may or may not have ever thought was possible but I doubt she cares)

Then she dies and she’s just

Done

She was in a good place to not want to die but I don’t know how much the thought bothered her cause of how risky she’s always known being a huntress is

But when she went to the ever after there was something to do and it was ascend

So of course

She did that

I think maybe Ruby has always hated how Yang reacts to her own danger

Because Ruby and Yang love each other so much but they actively exist in each others worst issues in a way that’s almost fine cause it’s them

Ruby abandoned Yang after she lost her arm but Yang was never mad at her she never even saw it like that she should’ve been able to follow her (plus Ruby’s thought her semblance was running away for the longest time)

Yang sacrifices herself all the time especially for Ruby and Ruby’s biggest thing is being abandoned unintentionally (as a parallel to Yang intentional abandonment problem) like through death however it’s their dynamic it’s what they do Yang will always do this because she’s her older sister

I love their parallels

ALSO IM SO SO SO EXCITED TO READ WHATEVER YOU MAKE HEHEHHEHEHEE

I’m so excited to see your take on how she’d be feeling and how everyone reacts and just everything I’m just so excited to see it and all your interpretations

I love when people make stuff of my posts ss

[mhbcaps]

I got tagged again for this by @chevvy-yates :3 thank you!

OC INTERVIEW: Sanctuary Zelenko & Joey Armas

▪ NICKNAME:

"Named myself Sanctuary after my favorite cologne, back when I was twenty. Company went under a year later, and then someone drank the rest of the only bottle I had. You remember Axis, baby?"

"That dumb piece of shit? Wait, that why you scrapped with him? Over the cologne?"

"Yeah. That's how I ended up with this. Couple people called me Zipperface for months."

"I 'member that. Won't lie, I thought it was pretty funny."

"'Course you did. Answer the question."

"Oh, my mama prob'ly named me Joseph or John or something but I've been Joey all my life."

▪ GENDER:

"I want you to guess."

"C'mon, I don't wanna be here forever. I'm a boy, and they're Sanctuary. 'f you try to make it make sense, your little head'll explode."

▪ ORIENTATION:

"I'm a man of many tastes."

"Nah, he likes anybody who looks like they'd grab his hips and make him beg. Isn't that right, baby?"

"Ain't denying. Hey, what're you squirming for? You asked the question, choom. We're just bein' honest."

▪ NATIONALITY/ETHNICITY:

"Born and raised here, but my parents both came from Ukraine. Don't really know what that makes me."

"You know more than me. Which is fuck-all, honestly. Whole family is dead now, though, so what's it matter? Sorry, 'm I makin' you uncomfortable again? Don't feel bad. Not like you killed 'em. Fuckers who did were taken care of years ago, don't worry."

▪ HEIGHT:

"Depends on what boots I'm wearin'."

"Flat, he's five-nine. And I'm five-eleven. I like to wear heels, though, so people look at me. Nothing gets someone's attention like a nice pair of heels. Or a big fucking knife."

"Yeah, I got the big fucking knife covered."

▪ STAR SIGN:

"Scorpio."

"I ain't even sure what my actual birthdate is. My citizen record says March twentieth but Mom always said she was just guessing. So that's, what, Aries or somethin'?"

"Not like it matters."

"Yeah, don't believe in that shit anyway."

▪ FAVE FRUIT:

"Ate a banana once. Real one. That shit was good."

"Where the hell'd you get a real banana?"

"Got a donor once who had a suite at the Highcourt, years back. Dub did her copycat thing and got in pretending she was a girlfriend experience or something. Stole everything she could carry. Not much, bitch had scrawny arms, but she got the fruit and some sweet threads."

"Don't remember that."

"Nah, it was right before we met. I remember, 'cause I was wearing the guy's underwear when we did meet."

"Do you still have the underwear?"

"No. Had to toss 'em after I got stabbed one time. Would've kept them 'cept that the bloodstain looked like I shit myself."

▪ FAVE SEASON:

"You think the twenty-degree flux we get counts as seasons? Well, it's winter, anyway. Shorter days, less sun."

"Fall. I make good money in the fall. Everyone's done partying for the summer, got their new implants, lookin' for glory on the streets."

▪ FAVE FLOWER:

"I dunno dick about flowers. I don't even know what kinds I got tattooed on me. Guess those would be my favorite, 'f I knew what they were called."

"I don't pay much attention to flowers, either."

▪ FAVE SCENT:

"Sanctuary. ...You didn't like it when we were talkin' about my "orientation" or whatever. Gonna really hate it if I go into detail about scent."

"I use pomegranate shampoo."

"Yeah, that's part of it."

▪ COFFEE, TEA, HOT CHOCOLATE:

"Don't like hot drinks. I'll drink lemonade, though."

"I used to drink coffee, but these days caffeine just fucks me up. I have enough headaches without it."

▪ AVERAGE HOURS OF SLEEP:

"Who keeps track? I'm a night owl, anyway."

"I try to get a reasonable amount in so I don't kill my patients."

▪ DOG OR CAT PERSON:

"I've never met a dog. Friend of mine has a cat, though, and I like her well enough, so that's one-zero in cats' favor."

"I like 'em both. Hunters and survivors, in their own ways."

▪ DREAM TRIP:

"Somewhere with a lotta trees. Grew up in the concrete jungle - a little more green'd be nice, y'know?"

"Yeah. I wouldn't mind visiting Ukraine. I don't know how much green is left, though - anywhere."

▪ NUMBER OF BLANKETS THEY SLEEP WITH:

"Two, so we each have our own and nobody's stealing it - baby, what are you doing?"

"Fuuuuuuuuck! My fuckin' fries are cold. 'Cause I've been sittin' here answering stupid questions. Are we done now?"

"We're done now."

▪ RANDOM FACT:

"I'm fucking hungry and now I gotta eat cold fries, that's a fact for you."

[spider-jaysart]

Hi!! Can I ask Damian (and maybe Dick 🙏?) for the character ask game?

Thank you, take care <3

@zephyrwrites2

Damian

Favorite thing about them: I just love his whole personality loll. He's a crazy, funny little guy that I think is really cool

Least favorite thing about them: Nothing. Only when he gets really mischaracterized by official writers who don't understand him, which happens A LOT

Favorite line: "Father, I imagined you taller."

Brotp: Damian and Jon

Otp: Damijon

Notp: Batcest, any of them that have adults paired up with him, including the canon ones Mar'i x Damian, Cassie x Damian, and Cassandra x Damian

Random headcanon: He can do ballet and it's because it's something Talia taught him while he was growing up in the league and being trained to learn many other things. He's a skilled professional at it now because of this and also bonds with his sister Cass over it and will sometimes even join her in her dancing. He also tries teaching Jon too, which can become fun for them both, and his other friends sometimes as well whenever they get curious or don't actually understand it that much like they think they do. Damian also owns a pair of green ballet slippers, but usually keeps them put away in his closet to keep them safe and clean and only takes them out when he really does want to use them.

Unpopular opinion: Okay sooo, a lot of people believe that Talia's character just gets only more ruined because of Damian's existence or whatever, but I don't believe that at all. Damian may be her son and is big part of her life because of it, but his character itself has nothing to do with hers like that at all when it comes to hateful writers choosing to write her horribly and just as another evil, lunatic villain and whatever else. Some people even say that he stole her story, but he did grow up with her during those 10 years of his, so of course he's gonna have the same life she dealt with and is also gonna have to get through certain issues from it now too because of it. But the point is that if anyone's gonna get blamed for Talia's usual trash characterisation, it should be the writers who hate her, NOT Damian who has many writers of his own who don't even treat him that well or like him that much at all either just like with Talia. Trying to pick on him is never going to fix anything about her. If Talia's ever gonna get anything better that she deserves in comics and other things, it needs to be done by writers who actually have care about her character and don't have anything weird against her that just only causes bad intentions of messing her up and then THAT'S what will finally start doing justice for her. And this not meant as an argument towards anyone or whatever btw, this is just me stating my opinion and beliefs about the whole thing

Song I associate with them: Self love by Metro Boomin & Coi Leray (Mostly because even though Damian may always put on a very confident act and always seems so prideful of himself a lot of the times, he actually has a lot of insecurities underneath all of that and doesn't actually always think so great of himself as a person)

Favorite picture of them: Definitely this very beautiful panel of him ofc💖

I just LOVE the way Gleb Melinkov draws him and gives him his Arab features without holding any of it back as well! He even gives him long lashes (longer than Flatline's even, which I noticed while looking at another panel from this series!), which I really love too!!

Dick

Favorite thing about them: I really always liked his leadership style, especially in the Teen Titans 2003 cartoon, which I grew up with

Least favorite thing about them: Only when he's potrayed as a dumb, clumsy guy in some canon stories just to lift up other characters and put them in a bigger spotlight instead. It makes no sense because he's a professional acrobat and always has been that way since he was a little kid, so how could he ever be so trippy all over the place as if there are invisible banana peels getting in the way everytime?! And he is very smart, especially with all of the important experience he has from his many years of hero work, so he's not dumb either and if he was, he wouldn't have made it so far with this kind of life because of it or ever get much done like he did because he has to overly depend on others knowledge

Favorite line: "Titans Go!"

Brotp: Dick and Starfire, Beast boy, Raven, Cyborg (I know he's friends with many others too, but this is the group I grew up with and am more attached to, so they're my fave to see together)

Otp: Dickkory because they bring the best out in eachother and have so much love for one another too

Notp: DickBabs because I just don't think they really fit that well together at all and most times Barbara just makes Dick feel bad in a lot of ways with how she usually treats him in a romantic relationship, and that's not a healthy thing to deal with at all. And then there's also Batcest and Slade x Dick (which I don't even get at all because Slade is just such a horrible, gross and very toxic guy)

Random headcanon: Years ago, back when he would used to have long hair still, he one time had it tied up in a ponytail and then a villain chopped it off in half while fighting him. Dick was pissed and really kicked their butt for doing that

Unpopular opinion: People always think of Dick as the positive, sunshine guy and then there are the ones who get very mad about it and say that he's actually the angry, tough guy because him being super friendly and happy is just too "ooc". I don't listen to any of that stuff, because I believe that he's actually both. He IS a friendly guy with a warm, charming, humorous attitude that easily attracts others, and is very much an inspiration to many because of his positive, sunshine vibes as a great, hardworking hero, but none of it makes him dumb, weak or gullible, because he IS also the type who can become very serious and gets mad when he needs to be, also doesn't actually take bull from anyone, can be chaotic and crazy, works a LOT, is independent, does have a lot of intelligence and especially experience that should never be forgotten about just because he's nice, and also definitely has the determined mind to take care of things and get them done even though others will sometimes try to tell him what to do, but he doesn't actually listen because he's not the type to easily be controlled that way like a puppy would be and if he believes it's something that needs the attention and it's what should be done and no one else is doing it, then he will do it

Song I associate with them: Annihilate by Metro Bommin, Swae Lee, Lil Wayne & Offset (because it's about being fearless, embracing self strength and individuality, and becoming a much more independent person, and I think that totally fits Dick because he's not the type to fear much and hates being stuck under Batman's shadow and having independence is something that always had an important role in how Dick's life goes)

Favorite picture of them: Well, I just found this pic of him, which was done by Travis Moore

It's very nice and really shows the struggle he goes through as a hero a lot of the times. Also, I really always liked the way he draws Dick, because he doesn't just look like everyone else and isn't sharing same face syndrome with his brothers and Bruce either, it's just a look that's unique to only him and it fits him very well. It's the exact way I always imagine him looking like whenever I envision him in my mind, even the hairstyle that's given to him by this artist too!!!

Thank you for sending this ask, I enjoyed answering it! And you take very good care too!! :)

[statementlou]

Hi, I know your acc is dedicated to Louis but are you not a fan of Harry and his music too (or any of the other boys' for that matter)? Also, I was wondering if 'coincidences' like Dylan having a song called 'You're Not Harry Styles' on her discography are just those for you? Coincidences I mean. I can absolutely understand that you or others aren't sure that they are still together, but when stuff like this happens I do wonder what you think of it?

case by case! some stuff I absolutely think is on purpose, some stuff that people go bananas over I think is literally nothing, something they won't even be aware of or care about, some stuff I think does suggest they are still together, but I also think they both definitely play to the larry side of the fandom sometimes but that that DOESN'T necessarily mean anything other than that they are playing to the fans so that muddies the waters considerably as far as knowing anything about their lives (and good for them! sad for us lol but I'm happy for them). As far as fanning, I am still invested in the whole damn gang of them but with very varying placements along the line from unconditional love to frustrated irritation so I'm interested in everything that's going on and super nosy about all of it but is that being a FAN?? IDK by fandom standards but otoh like... no normal person knows as much about Harry Styles as I do so I guess you could say so lol. And I do like Harry's music! It's not as tailor made to my exact personal tastes as Louis' but I like a lot of it and like seeing him at the forum in 2018 was one of the best shows I've been to in my life, I don't hate it you know! And he can be very funny on the rare occasion we get to see it. And I love a lot of Zayn's music (and have a lot of affection for his weirdo fuckboi self) and to be honest I am EXTREMELY invested in the possibility of getting to see Zayn perform at some point be it livestream or whatever I really think it might happen?!! I will lose it if so. Liam's music, and Niall's these days, isn't really my thing, but I'm always keeping up and I can't give Liam the hugs he so desperately needs so I hope he gets his radio hit! So idk I'm still OT5 oriented in some ways but there is only one man in this world who never disappoints me/ I would give it all up for/ I actually truly think is one of the world's rarest and specialist angels/ I think is a music and business and just general industry genius of his time/ has the prettiest voice I have ever heard/ etc and I think we all know who that is...

[skippyv20]

Let’s take a peek in MM’s diary….

Dear diary,

Sometime 2022/2023

I sent off a letter to Omid today. I was so smart, I told him to eat it after he finished reading it! Brilliant I am! Anyways, here is a copy for my records….(I have to have some idea of what I have to deny)

Hi ya Omid!

I have been writing day and night to get these 200,001 pages to you! I am almost done. As you have 2 chapters, I am now sending the other 441. Just quick notes, the chapter titled The Racists…just fill in the two names. It doesn’t matter who you write down, I will just deny all anyways. Make no mistake I will throw you under the bus. I would strongly suggest one name is the leader, the other is the crybaby. (Did I say that?). Anyways, go with those two. It should be enough to stir things up.

I would love to have a whole chapter on the “children” and the issues they face, but I haven’t seen them very often in the last couple of years, so nothing new. I would love a chapter on how amazing I am, I’m thinking title the chapter “The Chosen Queen”, then you know, the usual…I am a humanitarian…(Quit laughing), gorgeous (add, botox and surgery free😂😂😂😂), kind (I do send out happy bananas (when I feel like I should care), generous (when I use other people’s money…I love charities😃), oh oh…mention I am very private (you know this is true). You know, just add the same stuff you write about me on X.

I want to stir things up, up as you know I am hell bent on revenge and filled with hate. I love writing these books for you, I work out so much that pains me. I hope you appreciate the time I take to write everything down with my fancy calligraphy work…oh…make sure you add I did wedding invitations for the guy that danced with Miley Cyrus.

Remember, I know nothing. I don’t know you. I have never met you (😂😂😂😂😂😂). It is so important that we fool everyone, which is so easy to do by the way. I can’t have my reputation tarnished by a scandal. I am still fighting off the damage I did in Australia, Canada, and a dozen instances in the good ole UK. I know you are wondering if I am ok….I am not. I don’t think I ever will be…but that is ok…I keep on smiling. I got a new set of teeth and these babies almost fit right. Hallelujah! Hopefully they won’t get loose like the other 65 pairs I have tried…anyways…I have to go now. Time to party it up with, you know…that one. He is so boring. So boring. If it wasn’t for the fact he is so easy to manipulate and keep in line, I would move on. Oh wow! That will be another chapter…looking to start a new life after all the misery I have caused, I mean….the misery everyone has caused me. I think I need to do another Oprah interview….ok, Omid…remember eat this note…every single caligified letter!😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

Your source,

Sally Lou

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[envieuu]

ENVIE.ㅤ   ⠀✿ㅤ   ⠀⸺ ㅤ  THE BATS, THE BIRDS, AND THE BEASTS

the birds and the beasts declared war against each other. no compromise was possible, and so they went at it tooth and claw. It is said the quarrel grew out of the persecution the race of Geese suffered at the teeth of the fox family.

FEATURED. envie ensemble

WARNINGS. several mentions of a sexually and emotionally abusive boyfriend—this boyfriend and his doing was weaponized as an attack toward the girlfriend on multiple occasions, mentions of infidelity, physical violence, fist fighting, cursing, just mean words throughout the whole thing, and if any of these topics are too triggering to read about feel free to click away and i’ll see you in the next piece !

WORD COUNT. 2.1k

Yana’s been on edge for awhile now. She’s always teetering off the handle, that's the norm for her. But it’s been worse as of late. She’s been waiting for a moment to snap. She has so much rage in her that started from love. She thinks that’s the worst part of all of this. She has so much love, she just doesn’t know where to put it. So it all turns into misplaced anger.

And be reminded that Yana’s been waiting for a moment to snap. She’s almost there. All she needs is a little push and consider her snapped.

“How are you and Hyunjae doing?” The question takes Yana aback. She freezes right as she’s going to grab for the box of cereal in the pantry.

“Excuse me?” Yana says.

“I was asking about you and Hyunjae. How are you two doing?” Jiali repeats, picking another almond from the small glass bowl in front of her.

Yana finally unfreezes, grabbing the box of banana flavored cereal. She turns around, now watching her as she carelessly chews on the almond. “Oh, I didn’t realize you were so interested in my love life.”

Jiali looks at the younger girl before turning her attention back to her book. She lets out an airy laugh, popping another two almonds into her mouth.

“I was just wondering. I mean, since you did kinda cheat on him, I was wondering if you guys were doing okay. It’s no big deal.”

Yana hates when people try to dismiss her. That’s one of her biggest pet peeves. It sends her to the edge. And another one of her pet peeves, is when she feels like someone’s trying to threaten her. That’s what sends her over the edge. If it’s anything she learned from living with her mother, it’s that if you feel like someone’s gonna attack you, you attack first. Yana lives by that. Maybe always being in fight mode isn’t a healthy mechanism, but it keeps her at bay.

She retrieves a bowl from the cabinet, sitting it on the counter.

“You’re right. It’s not a big deal, which is why I’m wondering why you care,” Yana replies with a sickeningly sweet smile on her face. “What I do is my own business, dear.”

“That sounded really bratty, didn’t it?” Jiali returns.

“Bratty?” Yana questions, her eyes turning sharp and pointed.

Jiali shrugs, another mocking giggle bubbling past her lips. “Yana, come on. I mean, you did fuck another girls man to make a point. I’m sure that qualifies as cheating and I don’t think cheating really helps a relationship, right?”

“I would fuck yours too if he wasn’t a creep,” counters Yana.

Silence falls over the two of them. Yana smirks to herself. She loves the sound of silence, because it means that she won. To her, there’s no better feeling than winning. She pours the yellow cereal into the ceramic bowl, the sound of the breakfast treats hitting the glass filling the kitchen. She gets a gallon of milk from the refrigerator and pours it in the bowl until her cereal is practically drenched. She thinks she should reward herself.

She knows the way to push Jiali’s buttons. It’s to talk about her boyfriend.

“I suppose you thought you got me with that one, didn’t you?” Jiali huffs.

Yana says nothing in reply. She just stands at the counter with a victorious grin wiped over her face. She scoops up a spoonful of cereal and stuffs it into her mouth.

“Well, you didn’t. In fact, you only proved a long-standing theory of my own.”

“And what is that bullshit theory?” Yana asks.

A moment passes before she responds.

“It’s that you’re just as insecure and fucking weird as I thought,” Jiali says, getting up from her seat at the table, grasping her almonds in one hand and her book in the other.

The smug grin is wiped clean off of Yana’s face, replaced with a nasty scowl. She follows the older girl into the living room.

“Insecure?” Yana incredulously scoffs. “Me? Insecure?”

“Yes, I know it’s hard to believe that a narcissistic bitch like you could be insecure but that’s all just a front to hide the fact that you are an insecure, shallow whore who’s way too afraid of what’s in her own ugly insides so she projects on everyone else.”

“So, yes. You. Insecure.”

Yana feels that piece in her hanging by a thread.

“Oh, I’m the one projecting because she’s scared? You’re the one who’s taking all of your anger out on me because you’re too fucking pussy to take it out on your psychotic boyfriend!” She yells pointedly, stepping closer to the taller girl.

Suddenly, the door to Kiyeon’s room opens, revealing her slightly disheveled figure, her pajamas hanging loosely off of her body. She rubs her eyes, attempting to wipe the sleep out of her eyes. “What is going on?” She groggily asks.

“Ask this freak,” Yana narrows her eyes.

“What the fuck are you talking about, Kannika?” Kiyeon questions.

“She’s talking about a bunch of nothing,” Jiali interrupts. “That’s all she does.”

“Or is it too much truth? You never want to hear the fucking truth,” Yana challenges, stepping closer.

The two stand there, staring the other down with eyes so fiery they could burn holes through any material. Neither of them had realized up until this moment, but both of them have so much anger inside of them that it’s practically swallowing them whole. They can feel it engulf their bones and degenerate the marrow.

Yana has so much love inside of her that she doesn’t know where to put it. So it all turns into anger. Jiali has so much hatred inside of her that she never puts it anywhere. So it all just turns into anger.

“Everyone tries to tell you the truth but you just tune it out. All you know how to do is listen to your boyfriend and do what he tells you to do. You let him feed you lies, you ignore very real girls who suffer at the hands of your boyfriend, and you do nothing about it,” Yana growls. “You’re just as bad as he is and you know it. That’s the real reason you ignore it.”

“Kannika!” Kiyeon shouts in protest.

Jiali can feel tears swell in her eyes, hot at her waterline but she pushes them back for as long as she possibly can. If she cries now she knows that she’ll never hear the end of it from the younger girl. So she stands there, letting all the rage bubble in her. She can feel her body get hot, her head beginning to pound—courtesy of the irritation bulging in the pit of her stomach. She’s not sure she’s ever been this angry. It’s physically painful. It scares her. She never wanted to get this angry. Ever.

She clenches her fist so tight that her nails dig into the skin of her palms and draw blood. She hears her heartbeat pounding in her ears but she turns away from Yana nonetheless.

“You can’t just run away now—” Yana begins, her hand reaching to her shoulder to aggressively turn Jiali back toward her. However, she’s briefly cut off when Jiali grabs the shorter girl by both arms and slings her against the wall with a thud.

“How dare you talk to me like that after all I’ve done for you?” She yells, the tears beginning to slip, her throat tightening as she speaks from the bottom of her heart. There’s power behind every word she spits out. “For you to even raise your dirty fucking tongue and talk crazy to me? Have you lost your fucking mind, you ungrateful bitch!”

Yana’s eyes widened, her heart dropping at the sudden impact. She’s never seen Jiali so serious. Looking into her eyes now, Yana sees something different. They’ve argued before but this time is ten times more intense than the others.

“Get your hands off of me!” Yana lets out an ear-piercing scream. She reaches for Jiali’s hair and tugs roughly, enough to make her stumble but Jiali doesn’t go down without slamming the younger girl into the marble floors.

“Stop! Are you guys fucking crazy?!” Kiyeon gasps, immediately going to the two girls pummeling each other on the floor. She attempts to break it up but the two are stubborn as they swing at each other, fists hitting faces and grabbing at whatever they can to hurt the other.

Another figure descends from a room, completely stunned by the phenomenon occurring in her home. Mijoo’s hands rush to her mouth in utter shock. “Oh, my God! What is going on?”

“Don’t just stand there, help me!” Kiyeon commands.

Mijoo finally awakens from her frozen state, rushing to their sides, trying to pull apart the girls with what little upper body strength she does have. After what seems like forever, they finally pull the two apart, Mijoo holding Yana in what could be considered a bear hug on one side of the room and Kiyeon keeping Jiali backed against a wall, her own body serving as a cage on the other side of the room.

“At some point you guys have to stop this stupid high school bullshit,” Kiyeon scolds, her voice an embodiment of tired agitation. “I don’t know what problem you two have but it’s going to have to reach a head now because it’s not fair to Mijoo and I to have to break up your shit every day.”

Mijoo stays silent—per usual. She never knows what to do in these situations, never being accustomed to conflict.

“She’s the one who’s always mad. Tell them the reason you’re really mad, unnie,” Yana barks, staring pointedly at the other girl, her lip already bleeding from the altercation.

“And you…you need to respect her. She does so much for this group. And she sure as hell does more for you than your mother ever has,” Kiyeon assures.

“Oh, you really wanna talk about fucked up mothers?” Yana scoffs. “And I’ll respect her when she finally wakes up and respects herself.”

She still never drops the patronizing tone and mocking smile and lilt in her eyes. It’s enough to make Jiali want to fight all over again, having to take a deep breath to keep her from pushing Kiyeon into the nearest glass table, jumping over that, and clawing her face even more than she already has.

“Well if you can’t find it in that ugly soul of yours to respect her then you can’t stay here,” Kiyeon says.

Yana incredulously laughs with the roll of her eyes. “So I have to leave but the creep still gets to come over? Right.”

Everyone is silent after she says that.

“You know what, that’s fine with me,” Yana says. “I’m safer when I’m not anywhere he’s allowed.”

“Actually,” Kiyeon looks at Jiali. “She’s right. I don’t think he should be allowed here anymore. It’s not safe for anyone who stays in the dorm. I honestly don’t want him anywhere near us or you, for that matter.”

Jiali clicks her tongue angrily, pushing the younger girl, making her stumble where she stands.

“This is bullshit!” She argues. “Because she’s a bitch I get punished? This is so—so unfair and you all know it. I never stop you guys from having company over.”

“Well, it’s not really the same…” Yana snarkily comments.

“Worry about being homeless, stupid cunt,” Jiali argues.

“I always have somewhere to stay.”

“Well while you run back to that spineless boyfriend of yours, try not to give him any diseases,” Jiali fumes.

“Slut shaming, how cute,” Yana retorts. “At least my boyfriend’s not a felon.”

Jiali grits her teeth, pushing Kiyeon once again, this time hard enough to create space between the two of them. She steps to the side, “I hope you rot in hell, dumbass.”

Yana says nothing, just standing there with a smirk on her face as she watches the older girl descend up the stairs. Mijoo finally lets her go. Kiyeon and Mijoo both turn to look at her with a frankly annoyed expression.

Kiyeon lets out a deep breath, turning back to the rest of the living room, which has almonds and cereal sprawled over the nice flooring. She places a stressed palm onto her forehead.

“It’s not even ten in the morning yet,” is all she says, standing in disbelief. She’s tired. That’s all she can say and feel right now. This whole situation isn’t even worth being angry over anymore. She’s seen this play out time and time again. She’s tired of waking up with a headache. She’s tired of having to play mediator. She’s tired of having to walk on eggshells around them no matter if she’s at work or at home. The screaming, the fighting, the crying—she’s just tired of it all.

She’s tired of being tired.

[seresinhangmanjake]

headcanon asks for Signed Away

ok so this is for the headcanon asks from @yanna-banana @wkndwlff and @mizbytomic. Tumblr deleted the asks (probably because they sat unanswered for so long, my bad :/) so im doing it this way. I hope you like them. Sorry for taking so long, but thank you for submitting :)

Signed Away:

A random headcanon - You were the one to convince Jake to become a pilot. He somehow thought he was too old and undeserving, and his father was still slightly putting pressure on him to run the company even though the contract was broken, but you wouldn’t let up, so he agreed to try. 

A family headcanon - Caleb was technically an accident. Wanted, but still, unplanned, and you were terrified you were going to be a horrible mother. You just didn’t trust in your abilities. So Jake created a bedtime routine where you listed all the reasons you would be a wonderful mother before trying to list any reasons why you wouldn’t be. By the time you finished listing the good reasons, the bad ones didn’t make any sense, and you realized it was just your nerves taking over. When Jake was deployed for part of your pregnancy, he made you promise to keep up the routine, and you did. 

A sick headcanon - Jake goes absolutely crazy when his kids are sick. So much so that his constant panic and hovering probably makes them feel worse, but you don't have the heart to tell him to stop fussing over them. You have to make him come to bed otherwise he will sit beside them all night.

A drunk headcanon - You don't get drunk very often. You're still embarrassed about the first time you did when you kissed him, even though Jake thinks of that day fondly and tells you often. Jake, on the other hand, has no issue getting drunk when someone else is watching his kids and he just wants to have some fun. It doesn't happen too incredibly often, but when it does, he's always extremely cuddly and won't stop touching you regardless of where you are or who you're around.

A birthday headcanon - For your first birthday after you were married, Jake bought you an engagement ring. It never felt right giving you one when you were in the contract because he would’ve been scrambling to find something that he couldn’t be sure you’d even like, and it probably would’ve been awkward. Your wedding bands were rather simple, and while he loved them, he wanted you to finally have a diamond. Ever since then, he liked to gift you diamond jewelry when he could. 

A secret wish headcanon - (gotta be honest, not quite sure what this means, but i’m gonna guess (and please correct me if i am wrong) something they secretly want? It was either that or something I secretly want for them, but I’m going with the former) 

Jake secretly wants five babies. He’s pretty sure you’ll never go for it though, because you’re basically thirty when you have your daughter. 

A fighting headcanon - You hadn’t seen Jake’s sisters since you were a kid. They weren’t able to make it your wedding, so the next time you really spoke to them was after you were already married. They unintentionally teased the both of you and made light of the whole contract situation, and Jake lost it, refusing to speak to them for almost a year until you urged him to. While you were out of the contract, the topic was still sensitive, and Jake didn’t let anyone outside of the two of you talk about it. He considered it in the past and he wanted to keep it there. 

An unexpected headcanon - Jason got married five years after you did and he invited you to the wedding. You didn’t know why he did but you went anyway. He had turned his life around and you didn’t have any hate towards him, so you figured it was the right thing to do. Jake was grumpy about it until Jason approached you both and handed you an envelope that contained a check for the 20k Jake paid him years prior.