#nah i'll stop this at this or i'll lose this energy i have right now. sigh | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

nomsugayoongi · 3 years

Text

Make up/Make Out!

Pairing: Jungkook X OC fem

Warnings: It's just smut. Pure smut. 🔞

A/N: Written and edited on a phone so please forgive any mistakes. Suggestions for more are very welcome and also thoughts. Let me know what you think.

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"Am I good to finish for the night?"

She'd been on her feet all day. As make up and hair assistant to one of the most popular groups on the planet, her job consisted of being ready at any moment, day or night, to get the guys of BTS camera ready. Today had been a particularly heavy day. Photoshoots and zoom interviews. You would have thought a global pandemic would have slowed her workload right down but apparently not. The boys were just as busy as ever, determined to remain a presence even when the world was falling apart.

"I'm not sure actually. I think one of the guys is maybe doing a live. Shouldn't take long, just a touch up. Let me go check." Another assistant hurried off, leaving her in what had been dubbed the "ready room" She sighed, sorting the array of make up products strewn on the counter into each boys respective make up bag. 7 individual colour palettes. 7 skin tones. 7 favoured brands. She'd been doing it long enough now that she didn't have to think anymore. Jimin's chapstick in one bag. Hobi's concealer in another. She was tired and frustrated. 16 months of a global lockdown meant she was now living in the guys home in the staff wing. Apart from video calls, she hadn't seen anyone and wasn't able to leave really. On the odd occasion when she did have to accompany the guys somewhere, she was subjected to regular covid tests. It was all just a little overwhelming. Like much of the planet, she was beginning to feel a little stir crazy.

The door opened and the assistant from earlier poked her head round. "Jungkook is doing a live. He's on his way down now. Can you handle it or do you want me to stay?" She could see the hopeful look in her colleagues eye that she could go for the night. Sighing inwardly, she nodded. "I'm good. Enjoy the rest of the night. I'll see you in the morning." She said, faking a smile. An immediate thankful grin was aimed in her direction before her co-worker quickly dissapeared. She sighed again, picking out Jungkooks bag and rifling though it. A V Live wasn't as intense as actual interviews. She'd maybe need to touch up his foundation and neaten his hair. With any luck she could be done in 10 minutes.

She was just about finished setting up when the door opened again. She turned with a welcoming smile but frowned a little as he walked in. His hair was wet, a towel still slung around his shoulders, face completely bare. "Have you just showered?" She muttered. He nodded, strolling over to his favourite chair and slumping in it. "Yeah. I wasn't going to bother with a live but it's been ages and I miss ARMY. Plus I feel kind of restless tonight." He explained. She nodded, a little frustrated that she'd have to entirely redo his face and hair. So much for 10 minutes. But it was her job after all. "So what are we doing?" She questioned, walking up behind him and leaning on the chair, a hand either side of his shoulders. He shrugged, looking at her through the mirror in front of him. "Whatever you want. Just make me look ok for the live." He replied. She chuckled slightly, studying him through the mirror. "You already look ok for the live. But I'll dry your hair. It's freezing in the office. Can't have you catching a cold." She smiled. He chuckled, pulling his phone out of the pocket of his baggy cargo pants and loading up a game. She smiled a little more. Typical Jungkook.

She got to work, removing the damp towel from around his shoulders, tossing it aside and reaching for the hairdryer. It didn't take long to dry. His hair was fine but he had a lot of it and luckily he didn't bleach it into the ground like some of his band mates so it was pretty healthy. Once dried, it was soft and shiny, falling prettily around his face. "Want it straightening?" She asked, digging her fingernails between the dark brown strands at the crown of his head and ruffling it slightly. His hair naturally had a slight wave to it. He had dropped his phone into his lap and his eyes were closed. He liked the slight scratch of her fingernails. It felt nice. "Hmm?" He muttered. "Oh..yeah. Straighten it." He opened his eyes with a sigh. "Are you alright?" She asked softly. "Yeah. Bit of a headache. The scratching was nice." He replied, a small smile playing around his lips. She chuckled, setting down the hairdryer and diving her fingers into his hair, raking her nails lightly across his scalp. Head massage wasn't exactly part of her job description but she had a soft spot for Jungkook. Her tummy filled with warmth as his head to lolled forward and he grumbled softly, eyes closing again. She couldn't help but smile, pressing her fingers to his temples and rubbing in slow circles. "Do you need painkillers?" She asked softly. He grumbled again but shook his head a little. "Nah. Already feels a bit better." He muttered. "Tension headache?" She questioned. "Probably." She diverted her rubbing to his hairline, digging her thumbs into the nape of his neck. His head rolled heavily against her hand, a relieved moan slipping past his parted lips. She watched him in the mirror, her stomach churning as she studied him. Reminding herself that she was working, she reluctantly dropped her hands, reaching for the straighteners. "So... we're straightning." She muttered. He cleared his throat, correcting his posture where he'd slumped down the chair. "Yeah." He nodded.

She ran the flat irons through his hair, alternating between looking at what she was doing and glancing at him through the mirror. "What are we doing with your face?" She questioned, applying a conditioning spray to his already silky soft hair, just so that the heat from the straighteners didn't make it frizzy. "Just make me look good." he said with a shrug. She grinned, picking up a clean powder brush, she spun him round to face her and booped the end of his nose with the brush. "Done" she smiled. He laughed, nose crinkling adorably. "You literally didn't do anything." She shrugged, placing the brush back on the counter. "You don't need anything doing." She said simply. He rolled his eyes, his ears turning pink. "I look like shit." He huffed. She was silent for a second, eyes flicking across his face. His hair was perfect, shiny and soft, skimming his large brown doe eyes. His nose was cute. His lips were full and though slightly chapped, kind of perfect too. Without foundation to soften his features, his jawline looked sharper. His skin was pretty good, the lack of make up making the cute moles dotted around his face clearer. The scar on his right cheek was more noticable but it gave his face character. "You really, really don't." She replied.

He shuffled shyly, fiddling with the phone abandoned on his lap. "I do. I look...plain. I can't go on camera like this." He muttered. She sighed, perching on the back of the sofa next to her. "Jungkook, you couldn't look plain if you tried. Trust me, if your ARMY see you like this they will lose their damn minds." She sighed, folding her arms across her chest. He glanced up at her, eyebrow hitching curiously. "See me like what?" He muttered. She shrugged, feeling somewhat uncomfortable at the things she didn't seem to be able to stop herself from saying. "Like...you. As you are. You've got that...thing...going on." She huffed. "What thing?" She rolled her eyes. "You know what thing. You give off heavy boyfriend energy. Especially when you look like this." She mumbled. He laughed, looking at her more intently. "Boyfriend energy?" She chuckled too, her face feeling hotter than she'd like. "Yeah. You know, that whole duality thing. It's cute. But it's sexy too." She babbled. "You think I'm sexy?" His eyebrows raised, his lips fighting a smile. "As your make up artist, I don't think anything." She chuckled. "And as you?" He questioned. She took a deep breath, forcing herself to look into his pretty eyes. "As me? I think you're one of the most confusing men I've ever met." She replied. His gaze was intense, forcing her to speak even though she wasn't actually sure she wanted to. "Confusing how?" He asked quietly.

She thought for a minute then shrugged. "Confusing in the way you play absolute havok with a woman and don't even seem to notice that you're doing it. You're such a contradiction. You're sweet and cute and warm. You're...soft and cuddly. The kind of guy who you want to snuggle and play with his hair as he sleeps. But you also have the ability to absolutely blow that out of the water and turn into this whole other creature. This...sinfully hot, dripping in sex appeal, gyrating menace. And you seem to be able to flip from one to the other and back in literally seconds. You're hormonal whiplash guy. One minute you wanna cuddle him, the next you wanna fuck him senseless, then back to cuddling. Confusing. But either way, whether you're cuddle guy or sexy guy, you're compeltely disarming. Captivating even." She paused, blushing at the heated expression on his perfect face. "So...you don't have to worry about what ARMY think. However you rock up, you're good." She finished with an awkward shrug. "Anyway, if you want me to do your face properly for the camera I will." She said, standing up off the back of the sofa and heading for her make up brushes.

"Woah. Hang on a minute. You can't just say all that and then pretend you didn't. Are you attracted to me?" He asked, smirking slightly, sexy guy definitely rearing his head. She tried her damnedest not to look at him. "Umm...you're attractive, yeah." She shrugged. "That's not what I asked." He hummed. "We've been in lockdown for 16 months. Everyone's attractive right now." She joked, trying to divert the gaze currently burning a hole through her professionalism. "You keep dodging the question." He pushed. She sighed, dropping the beauty blender she was currently picking apart and turning to him. "Yeah, I'm attracted to you. A large portion of the globe is attracted to you." She shrugged. "Yeah but I wasn't asking the globe. I asked you." He replied. "Well I answered. So are we doing your make up or no? It's late." She sighed, flustered. The way he was looking at her made her squirm. Curiously, but with something darker going on behind those doe eyes. "I don't know if I'm attracted to you. I've never thought about it." He muttered. She swallowed hard, looking everywhere but at him. "I didn't ask." She shrugged. "Yeah but after what you said, I can't just ignore it." He sat back in the chair, studying her. Her stomach twisted nervously. "You're cute. Short. I like that. You have nice hair. And your eyes are really pretty." He said absently, as though not actually talk to her, just assessing. She shuffled uncomfortably, her cheeks burning. "I like you. I'm just...not good at this sort of thing. I started training for BTS when I was 15. It didn't leave me a whole lot of time or opportunity to figure out the whole dating thing." He said, a hint of shyness dripping into his voice. "Oh please, I've seen you on stage. You can flirt like a pro." She scoffed. "Flirt, yeah. When it's empty. I can do it when I know it's not going anywhere. Flirting on stage isn't real. I'm not good when it is real." He shrugged. "I dunno...maybe we should...kiss..or something." He babbled. She gawped at him stupidly. "Easiest way to figure out what's going on here." He said, another shrug indicating his nerves. She swallowed, nodding slightly. "Ok." She didn't even really think about the answer, it just fell out.

He stood, shaking his hair out if his eyes, alternating between jamming his hands in his pockets and taking them out again. He was too cute. A kind of deer in the headlights look about him. The confidence he exuded on stage was nowhere near. He looked nervous. He took a few steps, closing the gap between them. Her heart was racing. He kept his hands limply by his sides as he inched forward, his eyes closing, a slight hitch of breath as his nose bumped hers then gently he pressed his lips to hers. His lips were warm and soft with just a hint of rough where they were chapped. Her heart rate doubled pretty much instantly, even at the lingering, closed mouthed peck. They weren't even really kissing but her stomach fluttered wildly. He shuffled a little closer, catching her bottom lip then the top lip then slowly opening his mouth a little more. His hands moved, running his fingertips up her arm, to her shoulder then resting on her neck, his thumb stroking her jaw. The other hand sat comfortably on her hip, pulling her into him just a little more. She sighed against his lips, her insides going nuts as her arms snaked around his narrow waist. Cautiously, he licked at her top lip, gauging her reaction. She opened up, allowing him to slide his tongue past her lips. A quiet involuntary moan escaped her. He tasted of sweetness and biscuit and she idly wondered if he'd been eating Pocky recently. The hand sat against her hip gripped a little harder. He exhaled heavily through his nose as his tongue caressed hers. He hummed against her mouth, withdrawing his tongue but still taking her lips in deep, lingering kisses, almost like he couldn't quite force himself to stop. With a long sigh, he pulled back, just enough to seperate their lips but still close enough for his nose to nudge hers. "Ok. Yeah. Definitely feel it." He whispered. Her eyes opened, her head fuzzy as she gazed at him with a mixture of affection and desire. She didn't even notice that he was looking at her the same way. He ran his fingers through her hair, a smile breaking onto his kiss reddened lips. She giggled dopily, forehead against his, heart skipping a beat at his responding giggle.

"Don't you need to go do a live?" She grinned. He shook his head, fingers entwining with hers. "It can wait till tomorrow. I just want to keep kissing you." His lips were on hers again before she could even process his reply. She moaned softly, melting against him. He felt sturdy and warm, he smelled amazing. He tasted delicious. He was almost too good. Her head swam at the feel of his tongue in her mouth, exploring, licking and tasting, possessing. He was literally making her weak at the knees. Her grip on him tightened, clutching at his steady frame to keep herself upright, genuinely worried that the depth of his heady kiss was going to send her slithering to the floor. She was just about managing to keep a tentative grasp on her composure until his lips left hers and started fluttering along her cheek, stopping just below her ear to suck the delicate skin there. A shiver bolted down her spine, her head rolling aside to give him more access. He moaned quietly against her neck, teeth nipping her skin. She gasped, another shiver errupting through her. "Damn it Jungkook" she whispered. She didn't know what she was damning. Everything? Nothing? It just seemed to be the only words she could claw from her addled brain. He bit a little harder, instantly soothing the slight burst of pain with a slow, tender lick of his soft, warm tongue. Her fingers knotted through his hair, dragging his head back so she could attack his mouth. He groaned against her lips, pressing his hips against her. She pulled his head back, her eyes locking on his. "You need to stop. I'm too horny for this shit." She panted, kissing along his jawline. He bit his lip, hand cradling the back of her head as her lips and tongue skimmed across his throat. "I can do something about that if you want." He murmured. She moaned again, temptation burning hot at her core. "Fuck" she hissed. He pulled her back from the assault she was carrying out on his neck. "Do you have a room mate?" He asked, brown eyes smouldering. She shook her head. "Where's your room?"

She could hardly believe how her night was turning out as she tried to make it to her room with some semblance of normality. Especially with Jungkook in tow. Luckily it was late enough that nobody was still wandering around in the hallways so the fact that she looked like she was about to eat him wasn't an issue. Arriving at her room, she'd barely closed the door behind them when he was back on her, pressing her into the door, lips on hers, hands wondering to her shirt, stopping the kiss barely long enough to pull it over her head before his tongue was back in her mouth. His hands agaisnt the door, either side of her head, boxing her in as he held her still with his body. She could already feel the uncomfortable ache between her thighs, heat pooling inside her making her squirm. How the fuck could he get her so riled up just by kissing her?

His lips moved down, back to the spot on her neck he seemed to enjoy biting, his teeth nipping and sucking once again. He was going to leave a mark and she absolutely didn't care. She hoped he did. She hoped he left several. If it meant he didn't stop, she'd happily have him suck and bite his initials into her skin if he wanted. His lips travelled further down, hands lifting off the door to cup her boobs, pushing them up and groaning in his throat as he licked languidly down her cleavage. He used his thumbs to tease her bra clad nipples, nipping and sucking at the swell of her ample breasts. She pushed his hair back, staring at him opened mouth as he moved her bra aside and wrapped his lips round her nipple. She moaned softly, biting her lip. He sucked deeply, the pull travelling straight down to her pussy, causing her clit to throb needily. His fingers tugging and rolling her other nipple. She wriggled desperately against the solid wooden door. He switched sides, giving the other nipple the same attention, his mouth felt hot and wet, tongue flicking quickly then slowly, then sucking then nibbling. Each gesture making her pussy clench.

She didn't know how much more she could take. The needy ache was becoming overpowering. Luckily he seemed to sense it, his hands slipping down, flicking the button of her jeans open. He eyed her quickly, requesting permission which was granted with an almost frantic nod. He smirked, hooking his fingers into her jeans and pushing them over her hips teasingly slowly. Her underwear went with them, balling together round her ankles. She couldn't even think enough to kick them off. He stood, leaning against the door with one hand, his eyes on hers as his fingers trailed lightly across her stomach then down, grazing her inner thigh. His smirk was torturous, knowing exactly what she needed and purposefully grazing but giving no relief. "Don't be a brat." She panted. He chuckled darkly, his fingers circling her bellybutton, the tickle making her abdomen clench. "This is what I was talking about. The duality. I like you more when you're being a bunny." She hissed. He laughed again. "No you don't." He muttered, pressing a searing kiss to her lips. "You've waited 16 months. What's an extra two minutes?" He smirked, his fingers once again playing around her inner thigh. "Jungkook I swear to god, I'm just gonna do it myself in a minute." She growled. He rolled his eyes, chuckling breathlessly. "Ok ok. Jesus."

He licked his lips, his smirk faltering as his fingers grazed her slit. "Fuck, you're already wet." He moaned. "Duh, I've been wet since you kissed me in the other room." She whispered. He bit his lip, groaning deeply, his fingers pushing through her folds, finding her clit quickly and circling. The ache tightened in her belly, her knees buckling. He dipped his fingers down against her hole, smearing her own sticky liquid around his fingertips before moving back up to her clit, his index and ring fingers parting her folds while his middle finger gently rubbed her sensative bud. Her breath shuddered, eyes closing as she swallowed thickly. Her head fell back, banging against the door. She was so turned on that his touch almost burned, so sensative already. He maintained a steady pace with his fingers, dipping back down occasionally to recover them in the fluid now leaking from her hole to make the glide of his fingertips smoother. She could barely breath. The stimulation of his careful touch on her clit was almost unbearable, causing the needy ache of her pussy to increase rapidly. She needed to be stretched and filled, her thoughts lost in how his fingers would feel slipping in and out of her greedy hole. Or better yet, his hard cock. She groaned, eyes rolling back as she felt his lips back on her neck. She gripped at his hair, inhaling through clenched teeth. "Jungkook, I need you to fuck me." She whined. He moaned, biting her neck again. "I'm going to. Just not yet." He muttered. She growled pathetically, writhing against the door as he maintained the steady torture with his fingers. She couldn't keep her hands still, grabbing at his hair and his shoulder and the door frame as the pleasure built from a subtle warmth to a searing heat, creeping though her limbs and making her weak. "Fuck...I can't.." she choked, not actually knowing what the end of the statement was. Can't stand it. Can't function. Can't breath. Can't wait. The gradual build of her orgasm was now rushing towards her with alarming speed, every careful brush of his fingertips nudging her closer. "Ahhh. Jungkook...fuck" she huffed. He smirked, lifting his head from her neck to kiss her.

It didn't fit. She expected him to ravage her mouth. He didn't. He kissed her softly, his tongue dancing across her lips, barely any pressure, his free hand coming up to stroke her cheek. Emotional whiplash man in full effect. The action of his fingers was making her wild but his kiss was sweet and soothing. It felt so strange to be kissed that way while being held on the very edge of an orgasm. The way he kept the same steady pace was vicious. She wanted him to speed up, go harder, follow the flow of her building release but he didn't. The slow build drew out her pleasure, his pace maddening. A rush of heat flooded through her, stilling her lips against his mouth, making her gasp for air as every muscle in her body constricted. She could hear her own pleasured wails but they didn't sound like any kind of noise she'd ever made before. Her eyes screwed shut, back arching off the door as her orgasm hit violently, heat coursing from her core and seeping though the rest of her body. She panted helplessly, spots dancing in front of her eyes, her muscles slowly realising. When her knees went, he had an arm around her waist to hold her up. "I've got you." He whispered, kissing her jawline softly. His fingers slowed as she began to shudder, instead moving to trace light, ticklish patterns on her thigh. Her head flopped heavily against his shoulder, fingers gripping at his back like he was the only thing keeping her in one piece. She didn't even notice him moving her until she felt herself sinking heavily into her bed. He laid beside her, chin resting in his hand as he smiled, using the other hand to move her hair off her face. She was quiet for a few minutes, slowly calming her ragged breathing down, enjoying the blissful tingles fading out. When her eyes could focus enough, she looked at him and whined quietly, her heart thumping painfully. He was beyond beautiful. A shaky hand lifted to brush a few strands of dark brown hair away from his pretty eyes. "Wow" she whispered. He chuckled, staring back at her. "You can sleep if you want to. I don't mind." He said softly, noticing her still dozy expression. She shook her head. "Don't wanna sleep. Just need a minute." She muttered. "Kiss me."

He did so immediately. She felt liked she'd kissed him so much yet it wasn't even nearly enough. He was the kind of guy you could lose hours of every day just attached to his face. It was something she would never tire of. Her fingers ran through his hair, sighing against his perfect lips. In her post orgasm haze, she just felt soft for him. Everything about him was so enticing, the pull of him overwhelming. She wasn't sure whether to laugh or cry. She gripped him tighter than she needed to, suddenly afraid of what would happen when the night was over. He broke the kiss, frowning at her slightly. "What's wrong?" He whispered, fingers trailing across her swollen lips. She kissed his fingertips, holding onto his wrist as she looked at him. "I just...don't want this to end." She muttered. He smiled, rolling his eyes at her. "It doesn't have to." He said simply. She relaxed a little, returning his smile, then pulling him in for yet more kissing.

The kiss became heated pretty quickly. She'd already had an orgasm but he hadn't. He nipped at her bottom lip, hands roaming all over her. He was pretty notorious for his lack of patience and while he had decidedly more restraint in the bedroom, he wasn't a saint. He'd been hard the entire time he'd been fingering her and while he did get off on watching her pleasure, he was beginning to feel needy. He pushed his hips into her thigh, searching for some friction. She pulled away from his lips with a sullen pout. "Why do you still have so many clothes on?" She whined. He chuckled, pushing himself up into a sitting position and shrugging. "Because you haven't taken them off yet." He replied. She sat too, batting her eyelashes and kissing the end of his nose. "Well that's pretty shitty of me. I'm sorry." She joked, pulling his shirt over his head. She'd wanted to be cute and playful but Jungkook without clothes was no joke. She groaned, eyes lingering on his sculpted chest and tight abs. "Jesusfuck" she muttered, broad shoulders tapered down to a narrow waist, the dark ink circling his right arm contrasted strongly against his skin. She bit her lip, oogling him shamelessly.He chuckled, feeling a little bashful. She trailed her fingertips down his chest, her lip caught between her teeth as they skimmed past his belly button and down to the waistband of his cargo pants. With a flick, the button popped open and he lifted his ass to help her pull them off. She'd barely got them to his thighs when she let out another groan. He was hard. His cock straining against his black boxers, a wet spot at the head where pre-cum had soaked through the material. She abandoned her mission to remove his pants, feeling strangely compelled, almost like she had no control as she leant forward, peeling the tight band of his underwear back just enough to lick the head of his cock. He let out a soft yelp, obviously not expecting the sudden jolt of pleasure. "Shit" he whispered, his hands scooping her hair back from her face as he straightened out his legs and lifted his hips. His boxers were pushed down enough to free him from them. She moaned quietly, her tongue gliding from the base of his dick to the head, following the thick vein that spanned his length. "Fuck sake. Even your cock is pretty." She said huskily, illiciting a moan from him. Her fingers wrapped around his shaft, steering the head towards her lips. He watched, entranced as she slowly swirled her tongue over the head, gathering the sticky pre-cum then retreating back into her mouth, grumbling softly with closed eyes as she tasted him. When her eyes opened and fixed on his, his cock throbbed in her hand. With her hair falling around her face, her darkened, swollen lips parted, her eyes glassy, pupils blown, she looked hungry, lowering herself back down to lick the end of his cock again. He hissed, hands gripping tighter in her hair. "I want to fuck your mouth." He panted. She groaned, dropping his cock, it smacked against his belly as he kicked off his cargo pants furiously.

Once off, she threw a leg over his hips sitting across him as her hands tangled in his hair she she caught his lips in a fierce kiss. He groaned into her mouth, he could feel the heat of her wet pussy against his shaft. It took everything he had not to adjust the angle slightly and slide into her. He wanted to desperately but he also wanted to draw the night out as much as he could. He wanted her cock drunk and helpless by the time he'd finished. He could feel her wriggling, trying to rub herself against his cock as she kissed him. He moaned, shifting his position slightly so that his cock slid between her folds, gently rocking so that the head grazed her clit. She whined, breaking the kiss, her head flopping agaisnt his shoulder as she bucked against him. "Fuck me." She whimpered. He smirked, catching her earlobe between his teeth and nibbling softly. "Uh uh" he teased, still undulating his hips to rub his shaft against her clit. "Need you to help me first." He forced her head up, nipping her bottom lip between his thumb and index finger. "Need to fuck this pretty little mouth." He grunted. She moaned, nodding. He smirked, guiding her off him. She slid off the bed, falling to her knees and opening her mouth expectantly. He scrambled over, threading his fingers through her hair as he gripped his throbbing dick and guided it past her lips. He felt her warm, wet mouth engulf him and shuddered, his head falling back, his hips beginning to move slowly, thrusting his cock in and out of her soft mouth. She placed her hands on his muscular thighs, watching his face crease in pleasure as she let him literally fuck her mouth. Her tongue slithered all over his thrusting cock, her mouth filling with saliva as the head hit the back of her throat and she tried to swallow the urge to gag. She stayed still, feeling the needy ache between her thighs grow almost out of control as he used her mouth. His hands tugged at her hair, controlling her movement, sinking his cock deeper and deeper into her throat. Her eyes started to water, gasping for air between his thrusts as he lost himself. His moans initially breathy and quiet were getting louder and higher in pitch. His slow, methodical thrusts were getting quicker, more desperate as he babbled words of praise between moans. "Fuck. So good. Just like that. Yes. Yes." She felt his thighs tense, his muscles rigid. "Fuck, gonna cum. Don't wanna stop. Don't wanna stop." He whined. She moved one hand from his thigh, cupping his balls and squeezing softly. He mewled in surprise and suddenly she felt the spurts of hot cum fill her mouth. He shuddered viciously, hands pulling her hair painfully but unable to relax his clenched fists. She continued to gently run her tongue across the head of his dick, feeling it pulse and twitch as he emptied in her throat. "Fuck. Fuck. Fuck." He whimpered, his grip loosening. He'd barely stopped cumming when he untangled his hands and dropped down to his knees in front of her. "Are you alright?" He asked between gasps of air. She swallowed the mouthful he'd just given her and smiled. He'd literally just cum and his first action was to check on her. "I'm fine" she whispered, pulling his head against her shoulder where he crumpled pathetically, still panting and whining softly at the aftershocks of pleasure running though him. She ran her fingers through his hair, smiling. He was sweaty and the perfectly straightened hair she'd given him was now wavy and damp.

He allowed himself a few minutes to recover, his legs shaky and his lungs burning for air as the warm, tingly satisfying feeling of his orgasm flooded through him and gently eased. He liked the calming touch of her fingers in his hair and the cool feel of her skin against his burning flesh. He felt her pressing kisses to his shoulder and smiled, lifting his head to meet her eyes. "That was....so good." He chuckled. She grinned proudly. "Sorry I didn't warn you...or pull out. I wouldn't usually just cum in your mouth without asking but...fuck, I thought I could hold on a bit longer." He smiled. She giggled, shaking her head. "It's ok. I wanted you to." She grinned. "It was really hot. I really like doing that to you." She admitted. He grinned, curling a strand of her hair around his fingers. "You can do that to me whenever the fuck you want to." He laughed. "Don't tell me that. You'll spend your entire life with your dick in my mouth." She grinned. "Sounds good to me." He shrugged. They both laughed. He stood, offering his hand to pull her up too. He kissed her, standing at the end of the bed, naked bodies pressed together as his hands wandered up and down her back. He could taste himself of her lips and though the thought of it would usually make him feel kind of weird, he just found it incredibly hot. "You taste like my cum" he whispered against her lips, tongue delving deeper into her mouth. She moaned against his lips. "Are you trying to kill me?" She breathed. He chuckled, pushing her back gently until she collided with the bed and fell backwards onto it. "Maybe" he shrugged, crawling into the bed between her legs. She gasped, shuffling backwards. "What you doing?" She muttered. He pushed her legs apart, biting his lip as he looked unabashedly at her glistening pussy. "Hungry." He grunted, dropping down onto his elbows and kissing her thigh. "You're going to kill me." She hissed, watching him kiss closer to her throbbing core. "Shhh. I'm busy." He muttered, teasingly running his tongue along the crease where her leg met her groin. Her breath caught in her throat. Just the sight of his head between her legs had her pussy contracting.

"Jungkook, I..." He stopped her, mid sentence by swiping his tongue through her folds. "Oh my god." She panted. He smirked, another long lick from hole to clit, groaning as the taste of her tingled on his tongue. "Fuck. You taste so good." He murmured. He curled his arms around her thighs, spreading her legs further so that her pussy was open and on display. A groan rattled in his throat, his teeth clamping down on his bottom lip before he leant forward and flicked his tongue against her leaking hole, feeling the ring of muscle contract wildly, trying to draw something inside. "You need a cock in you, huh?" He muttered, talking to her pussy. He flicked his tongue once more watching the muscles contract again. "I know you're needy. Just wait a little longer. I need to make her cum again and then I'm all yours. Promise." He whispered.

She watched in amazement. He was nestled comfortably between her parted legs, talking to her vagina like it was a separate entity. She knew Jungkook had a habit of talking to inanimate objects, she'd seen him apologise to chairs when he'd walked into them and ask his food if it was cool enough to eat yet but she'd never imagined in a billion years that that extended to pussy too. When he spoke to chairs, it was adorable. When he spoke to her pussy, it was mind meltingly sexy. She kind of wanted to sit there, third wheeling while he had a whole ass conversation with it. Another flick of his tongue broke her thought then as his tongue fluttered up to her clit, her mind went completely blank. He ate pussy the way he ate noodles, slurping, sucking, lips and tongue. Repeat until insane. He didn't seem to care about the sloppy sounds or lip smacking. He was a noisy eater and she fucking loved it. He dived in enthusiastically and for a woman, there was nothing sexier than a guy who ate pussy because he loved it, not because he felt he had to. He groaned happily, his tongue everywhere, lips closing around her clit, sucking and licking her most sensitive spot until he had to tighten his grip on her thighs to keep her still. Her orgasm built quickly, her hips writhing as she clawed at the sheets beneith her, legs kicking involuntarily under his vice like grip. He moaned, forcing her legs up, his hands behind her knees as he hovered over her, head moving as he made out with her clit like it was her mouth. He didn't stop as her orgasm hit, sucking and licking at her pussy until she was convulsing, her cries somewhere between pleasure and distress. "AHHHH JUNGKOOK, PLEASE" she wailed. "Want me to stop?" He panted quickly, his tongue swirling against her overly sensative clit once again. "YES. NO. I DON'T KNOW" she squealed. It felt too intense. Almost painful. But so good. Unlike anything she'd ever felt before. Her past experiences had all ended as soon as she'd cum but apparently that didn't necessarily mean the end to Jungkook. She crushed the pillow to her face, barely muffling the strangled moans escaping her. "Oh fuck. I'm gonna cum again." She cried. This pleasure was different. Sharper. Her muscles burned, being tensed for too long but unable to relax under his persistent tongue. Her mouth dropped open in a silent scream, her vision went blank, her skin felt on fire and then the raging, hot, sharp pleasure eased. Her muscles slowly unwound and she practically melted into the bed. He was beside her without her even noticing him move. Gentle kisses peppered her face and he moved her sweaty hair back. "Just breath babygirl" he cooed. "Are you alright? Too much?" He whispered. She shook her head, grabbing for his hand and clutching it as her senses returned. "Need you in me." She growled, throwing the pillow aside.

Something about her last orgasm had snapped her resolve and even though the pleasent tingles still washed through her, she couldn't think of anything other than how empty she felt. She'd been craving his cock inside her since they'd kissed against the door and that was hours ago. She couldn't stand another minute of teasing and Jungkooks cocky smirk wasn't helping her any. "Ooh. I really drove you crazy." He teased. "Remind me to do that again..." He kissed her, his tongue teasing her lips and leaving the taste of herself behind, "..and again" He nibbled her bottom lip softly, "...and again!" He whispered. She glared at him as he smiled widely, his nose crinkling. "Don't bunny smile at me." She hissed. He laughed, trailing his fingers across her stomach. "I thought you liked the duality thing. That's what you said earlier." He grinned. "I do...but can you save the bunny bit until after you've fucked me." She whined. He laughed harder. "If you wanna fuck, I'm not stopping you." He shrugged. She eyed him for a second then pushed him onto his back, throwing her leg over his hips. He hummed appreciatively, biting his lip as his eyes roamed slowly down her body, taking his hard cock in his hand and rubbing it against her pussy. "Y'know, I've just had an orgasm. My legs are still wobbly. If you were a gentleman you'd do the work." She smirked, grinding against his cock. He laughed, raising an eyebrow. "Oh is that right?"

He sat up suddenly, sending her flying backwards, she screeched and giggled, grabbing onto his arms as he flipped them so that he was on top of her. He took her hands, pinning them either side of her head. "I was letting you take control cause you said you wanted to fuck. But now..." He paused, kissing her, groaning into her mouth as his tongue slid against hers. "...I'm in control...and I don't wanna fuck. I'm gonna go nice...and slow." He grinned as she started to protest, taking his dick in his hand and rubbing the end against her hole, chuckling as her words stopped instantly. "Yeah, thought that'd shut you up." He lined up, pushing forward, his eyes fluttering as he felt the soft slick heat stretch and swallow the tip. She tried to raise her hips but he pinned them down with a smirk, kissing her softly before resting his forehead against hers. "No baby. Slowly." He breathed, pushing forward a little more. He savoured the feeling of her tight, hot pussy accepting him inch by inch until his hips were flush against hers. He exhaled heavily, his eyes closing as he pressed his lips to hers hungrily. "Wrap your legs around me" he whispered, looking into her lust filled eyes. With her hips lifted, it changed the angle allow him even deeper. "Oh fuck" she grunted, her hands clenched against his shoulders. "Too deep?" He muttered. She shook her head. She felt stretched and filled completely. He was deep enough to make her toes curl. He withdrew just as slowly, whining, his mouth falling open and his brow creasing. "Oh shit." He groaned. He'd wanted to go slow. To tease her until she couldn't stand it anymore but he was the one who gave in first. She was hot and tight and velvety soft. His stomach tightened, his hips moving faster automatically. He kissed her desperately, moans mingling together along with their tongues. Every time he started to pull out, her walls clamped around him, holding and squeezing his throbbing cock. He could barely form a thought, feverishly driving his cock into her over and over as she moaned beneath him. He could feel her getting tighter and wetter. He forced his eyes open. "Look at me" he panted. Her eyes opened, glassy and unfocused. He moaned deeply, the pleasured expression etched on his face along with the sounds he was making only pushed her closer to release. He looked and sounded so fucking sexy, the perfect drag of his thick, hot cock, so hard, so deep, she'd never felt anything like it. She felt like everything about him was designed to please. "Jungkook..." she purred, her hips rolling and bucking in rhythm with his. "Fuck. I'm so close." He moaned. She bit her lip. His golden skin gleamed as sweat began to roll down his neck and onto his chest. Her back arched, the steady thrust of his cock pounding into her driving her closer and closer. She gripped his back, her nails clenching. He felt the bite of pain and hissed, thrusting harder. "Let go baby. Let me see you come undone one more time." He growled. It was like she didn't have a choice, her body simply obeying, her orgasm shattering through her. He felt it, the hard clench of her walls followed by the rapid pulsing, milking his cock, pulling his cum from him. His steady rhythm faltered, his head dropping onto her shoulder as he fucked through the pleasure, his cum spilling deep inside her making his thrusting sloppier. He was still twitching as his arms gave out and he flopped heavily down on top of her, gasping for air, his head swimming and buzzing. He could feel her hot, ragged breath against his ear. He wanted to move off of her, check she was ok, do something but he couldn't move. He felt heavy, his mind cloudy. He just about managed to throw his leg over her hips and slither beside her, dozily pulling her into his arms as he pressed soft, breathless kisses to her forehead. "Roll" he mumbled, tapping her hip. She forced herself onto her side, grumbling contentedly as he curled up behind her, spooning her. "I think I'm gonna pass out." She whispered, giggling weakly. He chuckled, his own eyes heavy, the urge to sleep clawing

at him insistently. "Sleep. I'm not going anywhere." He muttered.

#jungkook smut #jungkook #bts #jjk #jungkook x reader #jungkook fic #jungkook fluff

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ticketstomydaydreams · 3 years

Text

5:3666

(All We Have: Part Two)

Part One

Colson x Female Reader

Summary: You and Colson fall into a night time studio routine when he starts keeping you company through your insomnia and you decide to work though some past demons

Word count: 3,200 (ish, I lost count editing)

Feels: Fluff with a dash of past trauma

Warnings: Drug & alcohol consumption, domestic violence, cursing, Colson being so sweet it almost makes your teeth hurt

Companion playlist:

Machine Gun Kelly - 5:3666

Warren Zevon - I'll Sleep When I'm Dead

The Vamps - All Night

Halsey - You Should Be Sad

A/N: If you've been affected by anything in this story, please know you're not alone. My inbox is always open and I'm all ears 🖤

______

During the first couple of weeks of moving in, you’d been partying A LOT. The guys wanted to show you just how mad it got, breaking you into their chaotic household, blending the days together. Everyone was hyper and the house was buzzing with energy. You'd been so exhausted from all of it that you'd been all but passing out each night, but you couldn’t lie, it was great fun.

You’d tried to pass on a few nights but Colson would never hear of it, often forcing you out of your room to get involved as the house was filled with people, jam sessions taking place in between drinking games. It was a far cry from your usual homelife, your last housemate mainly kept to themselves so your place was normally pretty chilled. Colson had used your place as a quiet escape over the years, but it seemed you wouldn’t have the same set up extended to you here with this lot.

With the pandemic unfolding, the house had started getting quieter, less people in and out every night and everyone was settling into a lazier way of life. The gang were mooching around the house throughout the day and while the house was still lively at night, it wasn’t quite the party central you’d almost started getting used to. Your normal working routine went out the window as everyone had started working from home mainly and without your daily routine, followed by nights out partying, your insomnia was back with full force.

______

You were lying in your bed, trying to force sleep on yourself but after trying to nod off for a couple of hours, you accepted defeat and got back up. Throwing some sweats on and one of Colson’s huge hoodies (you’d been slowly sneaking them out of his closet, finding that the masses of material drowning your small frame were super comforting), you headed down to the kitchen, turned the stove on and filled the kettle up. You were scrolling through your phone when you heard footsteps on the tiled floor. Colson strolled into the kitchen looking disheveled in a white tank top and boxer shorts, hair ruffled and looking sleepy

“Dude, it’s 3am how come you’re up?”

“Couldn’t sleep, living that oh so fun insomnia life again” you sighed “Did I wake you?”

“Nah, I was already awake. Couldn’t sleep either and heard someone moving about so thought I’d come down” He replied, climbing onto one of the breakfast stools

“Yeah, I think it’s not having much of a routine. Hate lying in bed staring at the ceiling so just got up. You want a cup?” you offered, pointing to the chamomile tea you were brewing

“Sure, thanks” he says, taking the steaming mug from you

You sit down at the breakfast bar with him and start chatting, scrolling through instagram as you do. After about an hour, as you’re talking about an article you’re reading, you notice Colson doesn’t respond and you look to your right and see he’s fallen asleep, leaning on his hand, his mouth slightly ajar.

“Hey, sleeping beauty” you whisper, rubbing his back with your hand “Go to bed”

He slightly jolts at your touch, opening his eyes “Nah man, I’m keeping you company”

“Some company” you laugh softly “pretty sure you just slept through all my rambling there”

He leans against your shoulder, closing his eyes again “Hey, at least you’re not sitting here alone. That’s something right?”

“That’s true” you smile, leaning your head against his “You’re very appreciated, do you know that”

You gently push him upright and stand up “Come on, let’s go to bed. I’m pretty tired myself, so you’ve definitely helped”

He’s laid his head down on his arm on the counter, his breathing getting heavy immediately so you pull his other hand making him stand up. He stands up and puts his arm around your shoulder as you walk towards the stairs, your legs feeling heavy as you climb each step, carrying some of Colson’s weight as he sleepily walks with you

Once you’re standing outside your bedroom doors, he pulls you in for a hug

“Night kid, don’t be wandering around bored if you can’t sleep yeah? Just come get me. Nothing worse than sitting up alone at night…”

“Will do. Thanks Col” You squeeze him a bit tighter as he kisses the top of your head

“Night” you smile, as he let’s you go and turns and heads into his room, waving his hand up behind him

Undressing and crawling into bed, your eyes feel heavy as your head hits the pillow. Colson was right, insomnia was a much less lonely experience with a friend.

______

Of course, as is always the way after your sleepless nights, you sleep in super late the following day meaning the cycle continues and you find yourself wide awake as the witching hour approaches. Feeling restless in your bedroom, you get up, and decide to head downstairs and out into the studio because you figure you might as well put this time to good use. You settle into a chair with your acoustic guitar and started playing, stopping and starting as you figure out a melody, working your latest lyrics in with it

“I wanna start this out and say, I gotta get it off my chest. Got no anger, got no malice…”

“I thought I told you to come get me if you couldn’t sleep”

You almost drop your guitar as you hear Colson’s voice behind you, “Jesus, how are you such an enormous human but you still manage to creep up on me all the time?”

“Just a stealthy motherfucker I guess” He laughs, flopping into the chair next to you

“Whatcha working on? That sounded sweet, keep playing…”

Colson knows you sometimes get a bit self-conscious with people watching you sing, so he lights his joint, rests his head on his hand and closes his eyes. You smile as you see what he's doing, thankful he always understands what you're like.

You turn back to your notepad, reading over your lyric outline quickly before repositioning the guitar in your lap and resetting the metronome

___

‘I wanna start this out and say, I gotta get it off my chest

Got no anger, got no malice, Just a little bit of regret

No, nobody else will tell you, so there's some things I gotta say

Gonna jot it down and then get it out and then I'll be on my way

No, you're not half the man you think that you are

And you can't fill the hole inside of you with money, drugs, and cars

I'm so glad I never ever had a baby with you

'Cause you can't love nothing unless there's something in it for you

Oh, I feel so sorry, I feel so sad

I tried to help you, it just made you mad

And I had no warning about who you are

I'm just glad I made it out without breaking down

And then ran so fuckin' far, that you would never ever touch me again

Won't see your alligator tears

'Cause, no, I've had enough of them’

___

“Man, that was beautiful Y/N. I got some chills right there…You just wrote that?”

“Nah, it’s something I dug up from ‘back then’. Been going through some old lyrics and samples while we’ve got all this time on our hands. It’s kinda cathartic to go over some of that stuff now there’s a bit more distance you know”

______

A couple of years ago, you’d been stuck in a really toxic relationship with your ex, Stevie. Your time with him had been a tornado of arguments, drugs and the constant heartache of him cheating on you. Every time you’d get close to having the strength to leave, you’d always cave in and the mess would continue with you losing a bit of yourself each time you stayed. You’d become pretty used to his violent outbursts, he had always been controlling and short tempered, often pushing you and throwing stuff around your apartment. Despite his own frequent infidelity, he flew into a jealous rage with you constantly.

He’d always hated Colson, despite him being one of your best friends, and while he’d play nice to his face you’d always get it in the neck once you were alone about how you and Colson were ‘too close’ and he ‘didn’t trust him’. Before that final night you’d spent with him, things had been pretty good with the two of you for a few weeks, there hadn’t been much drama and so you hadn’t thought too much of inviting him out with you and the gang for a night out clubbing. Your good run had clearly come to an end, when you felt his hand grab your arm tightly and drag you off the dancefloor where you’d been dancing with Colson. You’d been bundled into an uber so quickly, you hadn’t even managed to get your handbag from inside. You saw Colson running out of the club, followed by Rook and Slim who was holding your bag, as the cab pulled away.

Once you were back at the apartment, he flew into a rage. You’d never seen him this bad before, his eyes were dark and when you tried to argue back, calling his jealousy ‘pathetic’ he snapped. He’d grabbed you by the throat and slammed you against the wall, “Don’t you ever disrespect me like that again” he’d spat in your face, before striking you so hard with his fist that the skin across your cheek split open. It was as if his actions had knocked him back to reality, he’d let go of you and you ran to your bedroom, locked the door behind you and started packing a bag. He hammered on the door, begging you to open it and you could hear that he was crying. You looked around for your phone before you remembered you’d left it at the club. Desperate to get away, you opened your laptop and brought up instagram, managing to send Colson a message asking him to send you an uber to his house straight away. You’d thrown your laptop and a few more bits in your bag, the battery dying before you had a chance to wait for a reply, before pulling the bedroom door open and barging past Stevie. He’d tried to grab you, but you’d finally had enough “Never fucking touch me again” you spat, pushing him off you. The hatred in your voice rooted him to the spot and he said nothing as you walked out, the door slamming behind you.

Once you were outside the apartment building, the reality of what had just happened and the situation you were in started to wash over you. You had no phone, no wallet, your laptop was dead. Just as you were starting to seriously panic, an uber pulled up and Colson had leapt out of the backseat. You’d been in total shock and had just let Colson guide you into the cab and then out into his house, up to his room. He didn’t say anything as he led you to his bathroom and lifted you up onto the counter. He grabbed a flannel and soaked it with warm water, rinsing it out before pressing it softly against the cut on your cheek, gently wiping away the blood that had mixed with your mascara laced tears. The tenderness of his actions was almost too much and you started to sob again.

“Hey, hey. Y/N, look at me” he said softly, lifting your chin so you looked at him, his blue eyes misty themselves “It’s okay, you’re safe here. Don’t move, I’ll be back in a sec”

He left the bathroom and returned with a pair of boxers and a t-shirt. Putting them on the counter next to you, he crouched down and undid the straps on your heels, slipping them off your feet and then helping you down from the counter. “I’ll leave you to change”

When you came out of the bathroom, Colson was lying in his bed “Come here” he said, holding his arm and beckoning into his side. You crawled under the covers next to him and snuggled into him, his long arms wrapping around you.

“Col…” you said quietly

“Yeah?” he whispered back, stroking your hair off your forehead

“Thank you…”

“You don’t need to thank me. I’ve always got you Y/N”

______

“I hated that fucking guy. That night...I wanted to kill him after what he’d done to you”

You see him tense up at the memory and you lean over and squeeze his knee “You’re such an amazing friend, do you know that. I don’t know what I would’ve done that night without you”

"You're a fucking warrior Y/N, you'd have handled your shit. I was just happy you trusted me enough to let me be there for you. You deserve so much better than that" he says, covering the hand you'd placed on his knee with his, staring you in the eyes and returning the smile that's crept across your face

"You know there's been a few punches I've wanted to dole out on behalf of you over the years, but you've never let me" you tell him

"Too right I'd never let you. I never want you in the drama, you're too good for getting caught up in that shit" he replies, pointing at you with mock sternness

"Hey" he says, seeing your expression wash over with a tint of sadness "At least the sleepless nights aren't what they were then…

… If we're gonna work through some old demons this lockdown, I'm sure I've got some songs and lyrics that have never seen the light of day" He reaches over the desk and pulls his laptop towards him "You've inspired me… "

"Oh no, are we gonna fuck our heads up with this?" you joke nervously, worrying that Colson's going to delve into something that's going to upset him

"Nah, I got you covered and you got me, right?"

"True dat" you say, as he holds his fist out so you can fistbump, his eyes now focused on his laptop screen

______

You felt kinda bad, having kept Colson up all night with you the last two nights, especially as you'd got him reminiscing about some tough memories, so tonight you tried to sneak past his room when your restlessness got the better of you.

"Nice try kid!" Colson says as he throws his bedroom door open, causing you to yelp in fright. standing there topless with his sweatpants hung low in his hips, he lights the joint hanging from his mouth "I told you we were in this together now"

"I felt bad, making you stay up with me"

"You didn't make me do shit…Wait a sec, let me find a hoodie. If I have any left in here…" he says, giving a pointed look towards the huge blue hoodie you were wrapped in before walking back into his room and rummaging through his drawers

"Oh shush, you have like a hundred…"

"Right come on" he says, pulling a pink hoodie over his head and flipping the hood up over his messy hair "Let's see what we get into tonight…"

______

And so the nights went on like this, the two of you falling into an easygoing studio routine. If there wasn't anything else going on in the house, you'd eat dinner together then head to the studio and work through the night into the small hours, skipping out the pretense of trying to sleep. You were both pretty productive at this time it seemed, both being proclaimed night owls, and keeping busy during these uncertain times was keeping your minds off the unfolding pandemic.

Considering he’d referred to his home studio in the past as the ‘rage cage’ (and it certainly could still be party central when the entire crew got involved), it was actually a place you drifted towards to relax these days. You’d always worked well together in a studio, but over the weeks spending so much time just the two of you, you became more in tune with each other, noticing when one of you had hit a wall and it was time for bed. Sometimes you'd work in comfortable silence, side by side, engrossed in your own seperate tasks. Sometimes barely any work would get done as you put the world to rights talking about anything and everything in a late night impromptu therapy session.

This evening, you'd been sitting cross legged in your chair for hours now, focusing so hard on editing a song which was driving you mad, you hadn't realised your feet had gone numb. As you try to move, your knees crack and pins and needles shoot through your legs. Colson looks up from the screen he'd been engrossed in after hearing you groan and sees you rubbing your feet trying to bring back the feeling to them

‘C’mere’ he said, before turning his chair towards you and leaning down to grab your legs, bringing your feet up onto his lap. He pulls your socks off and begins massaging your feet. You lean your head back, eyes closed and let out a long ‘hmmm’. You don’t see Colson glancing over at you and shifting in his seat as he lets out slow breath before turning back to his screen

“Now this is the kind of work session I could get used to”, you sighed "You being my studio bitch on hand for foot rubs. Although, I imagine this enjoyment goes both ways Mr Foot Lover” you tease, throwing him an exaggerated wink

Colson throws his head back with a hearty chuckle, and light heartedly slaps your calf

"Keep it in your pants Y/N"

You laugh and wiggle your toes, Colson letting out a dramatic, throaty groan in response. "Those are some sexy little toes though" he states, sticking his tongue out.

Still laughing, you put your hand to your chest, and gasp as you feign prudishness and try to pull your feet away. He grabs both your feet in one of his hands, keeping them in place then leans over the desk and pulls your laptop towards you

"Get on with some work you, this is supposed to be keeping you motivated, not distracted"

He scolds affectionately, with a smile on his face

“Okay, okay, spoilsport” you grumble as you pull your computer onto your lap

Half an hour passes, your legs still on Colson’s lap with him still massaging your feet absentmindedly with one hand while he works, and your eyes begin to feel heavy. You don’t realise you’ve fallen asleep, until you’re awoken by a “woah” from Colson as he catches your laptop which is about to fall. Taking it from your lap, he states “Right, time for bed you”

You check your phone and see it’s already 5:36am.

You stand up and stretch then walk over behind Colson, putting your arms around his shoulders, and resting your chin on his head. Looking at his screen, you yawn “You got much left to do?”

He leans back into you, bringing his hand up to rest on your arm, “Making some good progress so just gonna finish a couple of bits”

“Okay dude” you gently kiss the top of his head and squeeze the back of his neck a couple of times as you turn to leave “Try and get some rest, we’ve got a long day of sweet fuck all to do tomorrow” you say through another big yawn

“Heh yeah, Night Kid” he says softly, letting out a yawn himself. Colson turns and watches you head out of the studio and lets out a big sigh. Feeling the back of his neck still tingle from where you’d squeezed it, he’s suddenly aware of how empty the room feels without you in it....

______

Taglist: @triplexdoublex @thisshitisfuckingdifficult @brightblaqkkheaven

Lace Up! ❌❌

#colson baker imagine #colson baker x reader #fanfic #fanfiction #machine gun kelly imagine #machine gun kelly x reader #mgk imagine #mgk x reader #mgk fluff #mgk smut #Colson Baker #colson baker smut #Mgk #machine gun kelly #mgk fanfiction #Mgk fic #Colson fic #Colson imagine

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astro-rain · 3 years

Text

delicate; b.barnes

chapter eight - “hovel, sweet hovel”

delicate masterlist

word count: 2k

synopsis: bucky and y/n arrive the shelter and take a look at what it has to offer.

pairings: bucky barnes x fem!reader

[A/N]: what would you like to see happen next? let me know! (p.s. this is what i pictured the shelter/hovel to look like)

"I think this is it," Bucky said, looking forward at the structure in front of them.

"That's the 'shelter?'" Y/N huffed, hopelessly annoyed.

They had been walking and jogging on and off for forty-five minutes straight. Her feet killed.

"We're... gonna die."

"We are not gonna die, Y/N."

"Look at it! That is a hovel!"

"Well, inside's better than outside," Bucky retorted. "At least no one will see us if we're in there. It looks abandoned, they'll assume it actually is.”

She sighed and followed behind Bucky into the shelter. It was a one story stone structure that looked so old and weathered. It... looked like a shed. An old ass stone shed. She briefly wondered if Wakanda had a storm season because she was almost certain this thing wouldn't withstand it.

The door let out an anticipated squeak, and she was just as disappointed to see the inside as she was the outside. Bucky put the bags down and rubbed the back of his neck.

"Yeah... this... isn't great..."

It was just as small as it seemed. And empty. Mostly. There were a few withered shelves with dusty pots and bowls, and an even more withered attempt at a table. There was what looked like a furnace in one corner with old, rotted wood in it. The wooden floor creaked under their steps.

The whole place felt like a ghost: desolate, ancient, and lonely. Except for one peculiar thing...

"Bucky?" she beckoned.

"Hm?"

(Y/N) hadn't noticed it when she first entered, but in the middle of the table sat a small, shiny, black panther figurine. It posed on all fours, looking ferociously up at her. It looked so out of place in contrast of the eternal layer of dust on everything else.

"What is this?" she asked reaching for the one thing that didn't match.

When her hand wrapped around it, energy surged into her skin. It felt almost... alive.

"(Y/N) what-" Bucky was cut off by a sound that startled them both.

In the corner across from the furnace, a section of the floor starting moving. Wood on wood on stone was not a good sound. Nonetheless, in mere seconds, there was an opening, and if (Y/N) leaned forward, she could see stairs!

Both of them remained still, feet planted on the creaky floor. They immediately looked at each other.

"What did you do?"

"I'm... not sure. I think I opened it."

(Y/N) smirked.

"What?" Bucky asked, confusion clearly evident in his tone.

"I should've known," (Y/N) shook her head. "Shuri wouldn't have led us here unless there was something more."

She held the panther figurine as she walked towards the opening.

"Wait," he grabbed her arm. "We don't know that Shuri knew that was here. What if it's a trap?"

"A trap from who? I don't think anyone knows we're here except Shuri."

"I don't know. J-Just let me go first."

"Alright. After you, oh wise one," she acquiesced, voice sarcastic but endearing all the same.

Bucky tried to suppress a chuckle. "Smartass. You're the wise one."

She tried to go down the stairs, letting him go first, but apparently that wasn't enough.

"Wait, just let me go look around and I'll holler when it's all good."

"Holler? Who says holler?"

"Me. Wait here."

"Fine," she made a show of pointedly plopping down on the top step, still and waiting as he requested.

It only took about ten seconds.

"Woah..." his voice came from far away.

"What is it?!" (Y/N) leaned forward.

"You were right! Come down, you gotta see this!"

She wasted no time... and standing beside Bucky, her jaw dropped.

"Holy..."

Beneath the ground was a significantly larger, way more modernized, and highly advanced survival shelter. All equipped with smaller versions of a table, chairs, and cabinets, along with a compact freezer and miniature stove, a chest, a closet, and two sets of bunk beds. Everything was clean and looked in optimal condition. There was even a rug.

"Shuri definitely didn’t leave you with nothing," Bucky commented, still taking it all in.

"-us with nothing," she corrected, retreating back up to the shed to get the bags.

Later in the day, (Y/N) got a handle on the panther key and how to use it to open and close the entryway to the bunker. Once she figured it out, she kept it closed, ensuring their concealment and maximizing their safety.

Bucky had found his way into the closet, listing off the contents to (Y/N) who sat on the floor, back up against one of the bunk bed legs. She was exhausted. Her body had been assaulted by adrenaline and strenuous mortal-danger-physical-activity. Bucky seemed to be fine, though. Curse that super soldier serum. His energy was always so high.

"...oh, and here's the bedding stuff. I don't know what this is, though."

(Y/N) lethargically leaned her head over to get a good view of the closet.

She chuckled. "That's a space heater...Oh! And next to it - that's a portable AC. Makes sense. I doubt they could get electric or plumbing out here."

And her head rolled back to center, eyes closing, body exhausted.

Bucky seemed to notice. "Hey, if you're tired, I can make the beds...or at least yours if you wanna sleep now."

(Y/N) stretched her legs straight out in front of her. "No, that's okay."

She wasn't about to force her one armed friend to make a bed for her. That's just rude. Especially after he carried those bags. She felt bad; she wished she had done more.

"Nah, I don't mind. It's not like I got anything else to do," he insisted, bringing the bedding over.

(Y/N) stood, body internally complaining in aching protest. She didn't really have the energy to expertly persuade him.

"Buck, it's fine." Her voice was faint.

He didn't even stop to hesitate, seemingly determined on the task. She thought it better to just give up and let him do his thing since he was so set on it. However, the sheet was fitted and there were pillow cases, not really one-arm friendly assets. He was struggling... very clearly. (Y/N) felt even worse.

He started moving quicker, frustration jerking his arm in quick, irritated bursts as he was trying to get the sheet to stay. There was still no success.

She stepped forward gently. "Bucky..."

"Damn it!" he hissed, slamming his hand on the bed frame before forcefully standing up. His hand went to his forehead, rubbing his eyes in disappointment.

(Y/N) was a statue. She had never seen him mad before; she had no idea what to do. Don't get her wrong, she wasn't scared, she just wasn't sure what to say.

"Can't fuckin' do anything," he muttered under his breath.

She finally moved forward. "Hey, forget the bedding, it doesn't matter-"

"Yes it does," he turned. "We're hiding from a collapsed regime and I can't even make a damn bed. Plus you've done so much for me, I just wanted to help with something. I just wanted to be able to do something."

Oh. Suddenly, his anger was gone. It was replaced with a miserable helplessness. It made her chest tight; she needed to fix this.

"Buck, you don't owe me anything. I'm here because I wanted to help, not because I was expecting anything in return. And I don't know what you've been paying attention to, but I watched you carry the majority of those - heavy - bags the entire way here while simultaneously figuring out the way to the shelter while my brain was momentarily smooth. You were the voice of reason in that chaos we just escaped from, and it's a damn good thing you were so calm because I don't know if I could have handled the panic of the both of us."

"You could've," he murmured. "And I wasn't calm, I'm just used to this. I was trained for situations like this."

No, she wasn't going to lose to deflection.

"Regardless, you were a huge help. Seriously."

He still didn't look convinced.

"In fact, I feel more safe here with you than I would with Shuri and the Queen. You're like a super soldier body guard."

A look washed over his face that (Y/N) couldn't quite place. He looked at her quizzically, like he was trying to figure something out.

"You... feel safer with me?"

"That's what I said, yes."

"You're not like... worried about..."

"The Winter Soldier? No."

He sighed. "How can you be so sure? You have no idea if or when I might... you know."

"We are literally the only people here, and I don't plan on saying the trigger words. So unless you plan on saying them, I don't really think we have anything to worry about. And, even if you did 'you know,' you could definitely get away with it and no one would find the body."

He turned bright red. "What?!"

"I'm kidding! Sorry. But Bucky, you've been doing so well with me and Shuri, and honestly the Hydra programming might not even be there anymore."

"But we don't know for sure!"

"Bucky..." she pleaded, turning her head slightly as to say what is this about?

"I can't trust my own mind," he sighed looking at the floor. "I just don't wanna do anything bad. It's just - weird that you don't seem to be worried at all."

"Why is that?"

"Everyone sees me as a monster."

The room was dead silent. He wasn't looking at her, but if (Y/N) looked at him any harder, she was sure she'd burn a hole through his head. How could anyone see this man as a monster? Logically, she understood what other people saw. But personally, she couldn’t find it in her to perceive him like that. It just didn’t work. All she could find was gentleness, compassion, and sincerity.

"I can't see you as something you're not," she said, whisper soft. "I don't care if you hands are 'scarred from murder' or however you said it a few sessions ago. I trust them entirely."

He finally looked up at her, his face filled with something she couldn't quite place. It looked a bit like disbelief and then it changed into relief and then something else entirely. A slow smile crept up on his lips.

"...hand."

"What?"

"My hand. Singular. Not hands."

A deep, deep smile - to match the one on Bucky - grew on her face just before the pair started cracking up ridiculously. Perhaps this was an odd way of releasing the tension, fear, frustration, and exhaustion of the day. Nevertheless, laughter was cathartic. It was so cathartic that eventually (Y/N) could hardly catch her breath and Bucky's stomach hurt. This went on for several minutes.

In time, they both calmed down. She didn't remember when exactly it happened, but they were both sitting on the floor now. They sat in between the two bunk beds, facing one another, each back leaning against a respective bedpost.

The atmosphere was different now, but not in a bad way. It felt like 2 a.m. at a sleepover, when the conversations get drowsily deep, with slow voices and honest confessions. It was heavy eyelids and low inhibitions.

A fresh wave of exhaustion washed over her. She let her head fall slack against the bedpost, resting.

"Bucky, what were sleepovers like in the forties?" she asked softly, eyes closing ever so delicately.

"Well," he started, getting into a story of his past with Steve and the couch cushions.

And that's how she fell asleep. Sitting on the floor, leaning against a bunk bed, and listening to his voice fade out into the background of her consciousness.

If only she knew how she would wake up: laying comfortably on one of the beds, with one blanket on top of her and another below her because he couldn't get the sheet to cooperate. With the pillowcase carefully draped atop the pillow instead of enveloping it because that's what one hand would allow. With the bed next to her being slept in with no blanket because he used his as the replacement for the sheet he couldn’t get to cooperate.

#bucky barnes #bucky fanfic #bucky headcanon #marvel #steve rogers #bucky reader insert #bucky blurb #bucky drabble #bucky fic #marvel fanfiction #bucky x y/n #bucky x you #bucky x reader #bucky barnes x y/n #bucky barnes x female reader #james bucky barnes

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saksukei · 3 years

Text

wen junhui college au

other college aus; wonu minghao mingyu

you're damn right if you think that wen junhui is a theatre arts major because he iS and that too with humanistic studies as a minor aH and he's also on the rowing team,,, he started rowing as a joke and now he has one of the best times??? like. how.

and everybody knows he has too much energy and he uses it in the best way possible

like the plays? dude has a separate fanclub

you keep on seeing new tweets about “who’s the black haired guy in the play?” like wen junhui’s popularity is straight up no joke,, EVERYBODY KNOWS HIM

you on the other hand are an exercise physiology major with nutrition as a minor and you're also part of the rowing team,, and you have the best time for the women’s team,, which means,, you see junhui every other day,,

the coach pairs you guys often,, but there’s only one small issue,,,

YOU HATE WEN JUNHUI

he's such a pain in the ass,, he teases you every time he sees you,,, he always challenges your skills and makes you doubt yourself,, oh the amount of times you’ve wanted to deck him in the face,,

and today was the same as well

“you're not dead yet?” you hissed, as you saw jun approach you,,

“dont sound so disappointed, I might think you don't like me,” he retorted, a smug expression on his face, as he set his bag right beside yours.

“but I really don't like you,” you roll your eyes,,

jun chuckled, as he clapped his hands together, getting everyone's attention.

you guys were practicing indoors, on the rowing machine because there was some trouble with the equipment and the coach had to go get new stuff

which also meant he left jun in charge,, the teams assembled,, looking at junhui for directions,,

“alright everyone, warm up for ten and then start with a thousand metres,” he instructed. “and y/n, you're my partner.”

you rolled your eyes while everyone was whistling or smirking

it was no secret that you and jun didn't get along and he purposely tried to get on your nerves,,, heck everyone in the club said you two would fall in love at one point or another but you assured them by saying you'd rather choke

“your IQ is lower than room temperature junhui if you think that I want to train with you,” you hissed, as the two of you walked towards the machine.

“oh I'm sorry, I don't compare my intelligence quotient to someone who was deprived of oxygen when they were born,” he snapped, as he started warming up.

“you know what,” you spoke. “i'll just aggressively ignore your existence until you disappear.”

“maybe you should try doing it with that bird hair of yours, looks like worms will crawl out of it soon”

“why don't you look at your face first– ass clown?”

“why don't you look at your face first ass clown” he mimicked in a high pitched tone and all you wanted was to stab him there and then

“CAN YOU TWO SHUT UP WE'RE TRYING TO PRACTICE?” one of the team members yelled, causing you two to fall silent and warm up.

the next day,,, one of your best friends had begged you to go to her department because she had misplaced one of her things,, you only agreed on the basis that you'd be getting pizza

you were passing by the theatre to the class she told you to go to,, and you heard someone rehearsing their lines,, you went ahead to see who it was,,

of course it was jun with a script in his hands,,

and you don't know what it was,, but something just pulled you into the room,, maybe it was the way his words echoed of the walls,, the emotion in those alluring eyes of his,,

you actually sat down and listened to him instead of wanting to kill him,,, understanding what the hype was around him,,

like? you didn't even know this side of junhui existed??? excuse me? he was the biggest dick alive to you so you never really paid attention to anything nice that he did but this,,

you didn't even realize he had stopped until someone snapped you out of it

and you saw jun standing right in front of you

“well well well, it looks like I have a fan,” he smirked, folding his arms as he bent down to your level

“h-heck no,, I was just,,, looking for the um.....” you cursed your memory internally for forgetting.

“umm?” he teased,,

“shut up, I really was looking for something,” you snapped

“alright, alright” he surrenders,, raising his hands in defeat. “how was it though?” he asked.

“what?”

“the lines,, i'm sure you heard some of it.”

“they were um,,, good,” you reply,, shyly,, you've never been used to giving him compliments,,

jun nods as an awkward silence befalls the both of you,, you take it as a que to leave,, but then his voice stops you,,

“hey,, why don't you rehearse with me?” he suggested. “my actual partner is really busy and I need someone to rehearse with.”

“uh,, yeah sure?” you reply,,, as he hands you the script,,

jun started reciting his lines and you responded with the same enthusiasm

but the only thing that worried you was the last,, scene

in the script, it was written that jun's chracter would walk over to where you were, push your character against the wall and would try to initiate a kiss but your character would push him away

and so jun recited his last line, “i don't think I've ever tasted lips so fine, heck i'd taste them over and over again” he walked towards you, eventually pushing you against the wall

and your hEART WAS LIKE BADUMP!!

and his face was an inch from away from yours and you could feel his breath tickling your ear and you realized,,, how pretty wen junhui was,, how perfectly sculptured his face was,, those lips,, those cheekbones?? wait what??

and you were so mesmerized with how he acted on stage you didn't really realize you had to play a part as well

jun broke his stance, “you know you're supposed to push me away right?”

AND YOU BECAME RED

“y-yeah uh–but I–um remembered that I left the stove on!” you lied. “aND I DID SO BYE JUN!” you grabbed your bag and yEETED YOURSELF OUT OF THERE

and jun was confused but he ignored it and started rehearsing again

you on the other hand were trying to calm yourself like ???? It's just wen junhui? what the FUCK? Why is your heart racing so fast?? you were so confused? wHY? why is this happening

and the next time you saw him at training, oh dear god

“well if it isn't miss sunshine,” jun grinned.

“shut up jun, your existence makes me want to die,” you muttered,,, you felt your cheeks getting warm,,

“well, great, I think I'd be doing the world a favor.”

“jun if you're going to bother me one more time during practice I'm going to kick you so hard you will lose the ability to entertain a partner” you hissed, as you started warming up.

“nah,, you don't have the balls to do it,” he grinned, especially proud of the pun he used.

“you know what,,, I don't give a damn, so just leave me alone.”

“you give so many damns, they're visible from space,,,” he says,, his face is close to yours,, and you stop BREATHING

jun grins,, he thinks he has rendered you speechless,, as he goes up ahead to train with the boys,,

aND YOU FELT YOUR HEART WAS GOING TO JUST POP OUT OF YOUR CHEST

and now you were noticing all of these little things about him,, from his silly smile, to how he rolls his eyes, copies every small thing someone else does, to his goofy jokes, how his hair falls on his face, or just,,, him in general

all the while trying to keep your angry/annoyed facade so that he wouldn't pick up on it

but oh boy, it's wen junhui

and he notices every goddamn thing

including how much you've been staring at him especially in today's training session

he knew you were acting really weird since the rehearsal thingy but he was letting it slide because he thought you were upset or something and he didn't want to get on your nerves more

regardless, you decided to ignore jun from today onwards,, to stop feeling whatever you were feeling,,

and every thing was going great

you barely talked to him in rowing practice, you didn't attend the plays or even go anywhere near him

and jun,,,, he stopped annoying you as well

for two months

the whole damn university noticed but nobody dared to say anything ,,,,, in fear that you guys won't talk again

you were casually walking to the cafeteria and you heard something that just ,,,,, made your heart stop

“did you hear that jun got injured really badly? He was practicing in the theatre and this glass fell on his foot,,”

aND YOU DID A FULL 180 AND RAN AS FAST AS YOU COULD TO WHERE HE WAS

you had no idea why you suddenly cared so much like sure yeah, it was bad he got hurt but you were running so fast you felt your heart would pop out of your chest

the nurse eventually led you to where he was

and you saw his leg covered in bandages???

and your heart just broke

“hey what are you doing here?” jun asked. “i haven't seen you in like,,, two months?”

“jun I'm sorry–” you felt tears slide down your face. “i'm sorry I ignored you every time you tried to make a conversation with me or whatever I just,,, I had all these feelings that I couldn't figure out and I got scared–”

“hey hey hey, it's okay,” he cooed, as he opened his arms wide, only for them to wrap around you, as you cried in his chest. “no harm done, I promise.”

“no but jun– I was really inconsiderate and I just kept on feeling like I was missing something but I couldn't figure out what it was,” you cried out. “i felt ignoring you would be a solution but I just, I don't know?”

“hey, okay listen to me– what happened in these past two months happened–” he wiped the tears from your face. “but I hope you understand that the only reason I used to bother you a lot was because,, well,,, I really geniunely like you.”

“l-like me?” you stuttered.

“why do you think I annoy the crap out of you?”

“because you're an idiot, you like doing stuff like this,” you answered.

“but you're the only one I annoy?”

“okay that part I missed,” you give him a weak smile,, jun chuckles,, ruffling your hair,,

“in all seriousness though, I hated these two months. I felt like you were upset or something and I didn't want to risk hurting you even more so I stopped talking altogether because I thought you'd talk to me if I did,,” he admitted.

“its my fault this happened in the first place,” you responded. “and I now realize how stupid I am.”

“you're not stupid, you're just an ass clown,” he joked, a playful smile on his face.

“but i'm still sorry, junhui,” you sighed. “i really didn't want this to happen.”

“hey, it's okay– we both were right in our own places.”

“so um now what do we do?” you asked.

“well it depends,” he answered. “does someone want a cute, charming, handsome and brilliant boyfriend?” he grinned.

“only if he wants an amazing, beautiful, smart and talented girlfriend,” you answered.

“oh he sure as hell does,” jun grinned.

#seventeen imagines #seventeen oneshot #seventeen scenarios #seventeen headcanons #seventeen x y/n #seventeen x reader #seventeen x you #wen junhui #wen junhui imagines #jun imagines #wen junhui scenario #wen junhui x reader #seventeen #jun seventeen #seventeen jun

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taleasnewastime · 4 years

Text

Kiss me

Taehyung x reader genre: angst; fluff word count: 4.7k

a/n: This is just a classic cliché, all very predictable but sometimes that’s comforting and just what you need to read. It has some angst in it but it is a happy fluffy ending. I hope you enjoy!

You took a sip of your drink as you looked around the room. You were stood in a corner out of sight so you could fully take in the room without being spotted. There were empty cups scattered around the room. People stood around in groups talking whilst others danced as the music blasted. You were used to coming to parties in the dorm as you had been friends with the boys for years but this seemed to be a pretty rowdy event. You continue to look around the room and spot a game of beer pong happening on the table. Jin was playing against Yoongi and from what you could see Jin was losing pretty badly, only one of his cups remained while Yoongi had 4 of his. Taehyung and Jungkook stood next to the table cheering Yoongi on as he held the ball. You lightly laughed as he took the shot and the ball landed perfectly in the remaining cup. Jins face was pure shock as Tae and Jungkook cheered and Yoongi just smirked.

You take another sip of your drink as you continue looking round the room. You spot Namjoon acting as barman in the kitchen and pouring people different drinks. And Hoseok and Jimin fighting over which song should be played next. The other boys are cheering Jin on as he downs his remaining beers. You sigh as you finish off your drink. Looks like you will have to join the party again and get another drink. You glance at your phone and have a quick scroll before gathering the energy to re-join.

“Are we boring you that much that you need to stand in the corner on your phone Y/N?”

You jump slightly looking up to see Taehyung standing in front of you.

“Just needed a minute away from it all, you know,” you grumble looking back down at your phone.

“Yeah yeah, come on I need you on my team for beer pong,” he laughs grabbing your hand and dragging you across the room.

You had known Tae for 4 years and been in love with him for the last 3. Not that he knew that. You had met through your job and hit it off becoming closer and closer as time went on. Your relationship was always a bit flirty but that’s how Tae treated all the girls you’d ever seen him around so you didn’t feel special in that respect. You hid your feelings towards him for the last 3 years hoping that you would figure it out, get over him or move onto someone else because you could never tell him how you felt to his face. But no matter how hard you tried you couldn’t stop how you felt towards him. You secretly hoped that he would work out how you felt and feel the same way back, but you weren’t holding out much hope.

Tae continues to drag you until you reach the table and then lets your hand drop. You look up to the other end of the table and then look over at Tae.

“I really don’t think we stand a chance against Jungkook,” you roll your eyes at Tae.

“Hey, two against one, I think we have this,” he laughs as he picks up the ping pong ball.

“Nah you should listen to Y/N, you guys stand no chance,” Jungkook says.

At that Tae throws the ball and it lands perfectly in one of the cups. Jungkook's eyes widen as Tae leaps up in the air and you just laugh.

“Want to go back on that statement?” Tae shouts at Jungkook.

Unfortunately, that one shot was pure luck and Jungkook absolutely smashed you two. Tae managed to get 2 more cups but you added absolutely nothing to the team. It was still fun though and you were laughing the whole way through. As Jungkook went for the last cup there was no surprise when he got the ball in.

“Drink up kids,” he laughs as he starts sliding his remaining cups down the table to you.

“Y/N is drinking those,” Tae states.

“I think you’ll find we will be drinking half each,” you widen your eyes at him.

“You were useless and got no cups, I think that means you have to drink the remaining drinks,” he smiles down at you.

“Urm I don’t –“

“Yep, everyone knows that rule Y/N,” Jungkook cuts you off. “Drink up.”

“Hey, don’t you go ganging up on me.”

They both ignored you however simply lining up the drinks and looking at you expectedly.

“This is harassment. I am a guest at this party,” you look at them both in turn.

With no sign of them backing down you pick up the first drink and down it and then move onto the next. As you slam down the final cup both boys are cheering and Tae picks you up spinning you around shouting in your ear.

“Tae, put me down or I’ll be sick everywhere.”

He laughs putting you down but continues to shout, while you just laugh.

“Another round?” Jungkook claps his hands together.

“No thank you,” you sarcastically smile at him. “I think I’m just going to go have a sit down somewhere.”

“I'll bring you another drink,” Tae says before you can stop him, walking off to the kitchen.

You look around the room again deciding where was best to go. Your eyes meet Jimin and Hoseok in the same place you saw them earlier but now no longer fighting over music. You head over to where they are stood talking and join in.

As you talk to them about what year in the 2010s was the best for music you feel yourself become more and more passionate as the drinks you’ve had throughout the night start to catch up with you. You are in a deep discussion about your favourite albums when you remember that Tae said he would bring you another drink. You look around the room in search of him in case he got lost trying to find you when your eyes land on him. Your heart gives a pang when you realise he’s talking to some super attractive girl. Your heart sinks slightly as you continue to watch them and you tune out of the discussion Jimin and Hobi are having.

As you watch them you notice Taes face light up at something the girl says, a wide smile takes over as he laughs. You can see two glasses in his hand as you realise he must have kept his promise of getting you a drink.

“What do you think Y/N?” Your thoughts are torn away from Tae at the mention of your name.

“Sorry completely zoned out then, what were you saying?” You smile at Hoseok.

“Jimin was just saying he thinks Lana Del Ray’s album is the best and I was saying that he is completely wrong as everyone knows it’s watch the throne by Kanye and Jay-Z,” Hoseok slightly slurs at you.

“Sorry but I have to agree with Jimin on this one,” you shrug at Hosoek. “Lana is the queen.”

“Yes, I knew you would have my back,” Jimin puts his arm round you squeezing him into you. “Come on let's go get some shots.”

Having sobered up significantly when you saw Tae with another woman you let Jimin drag you towards the kitchen with his arm still around your shoulders. As you pass Tae he doesn’t even realise, his eyes completely focused on the girl in front of him. You decide shots are definitely the right thing to do, you need to have some more alcohol to take your mind off the way his eyes shone looking at her. You lean your head on Jimin's shoulder letting out a soft sigh and Jimin gives your shoulder a slight squeeze.

You make it to the kitchen and Jimin starts pouring shots, he hands you one while he takes the other.

“To Lana,” he shouts while clinking your glass.

You both down the liquid and he immediately starts to pour more.

“Namjoon, Jungkook! Come take a drink,” Jimin screams at the boys who are stood a few feet away.

“What are we drinking to?” Namjoon asks as he takes a shot.

“To friends,” you say as you push your glass towards everyone else’s.

Again you down your shot and Jimin starts pouring another.

“Where are the others?” Jimin pouts, pouring more shots for the missing BTS members.

“I’ll go grab them,” Jungkook excitedly jumps up and runs from the room.

“Come on one more before they all crash the scene,” Jimin hands you and Namjoon another shot.

“To Jimin,” Namjoon announces.

“To Jimin!” Jimin shouts a massive smile taking over his face.

With that Hoseok and Jin walk into the room, closely followed by Yoongi. Jin and Yoongi glance at each other as Jimin sloshes a drink towards them.

“To BTS,” Jimin happily shouts as he raises his glass only for Namjoon to grab his wrist.

“Maybe we should wait for the whole of BTS to cheers that.”

“Found him,” Jungkook bounds into the room followed by Tae who’s still holding two full cups.

“Urm, maybe I should leave you guys to it,” you mumble out as you put your shot on the side and start to turn around to leave the room.

“No way. You are BTS’s honorary 8th member tonight, did no one tell you?” Hoseok says gabbing your arm before you could walk out. A few of the other are nodding their heads in agreement.

“Ok,” you give a small smile picking back up your shot.

Taehyung and Jungkook stand opposite you taking their shots and everyone raises their glasses cheersing BTS.

You laugh as you finish the drink, laughing at how ridiculous the situation you were in was. The alcohol was slowly catching up with you too.

“Another one!” Jimin shouts starting to pour more shots.

“I think you’ve had enough mate,” Jin says as he takes the bottle off Jimin.

“You’re no fun,” he pouts back.

You stick your hand out to grab one of the shots Jimin managed to pour before he was stopped only to be stopped by Yoongi.

“And I think you’ve had enough too.”

“You’re no fun,” you repeat Jimin's earlier statement pouting in the same way he did. Yoongi smiles back at you letting your arm drop. You look around the circle seeing Hoseok and Jungkook laughing at you. Your eyes briefly land on Tae who is staring back at you worry slightly filling his eyes. Your eyes continue round the circle until they meet Jimin who’s still wearing the pout.

“Come on Jimin, let's go have some fun somewhere else,” you grab his hand and drag him out the room before anyone can say anything. You don’t look back to see anyone’s reaction as you take him to where the music is the loudest and you start jumping around to the beat.

You spend the rest of the night like this. You and Jimin were both in hysterics as you tried to out compete each other’s bad dance moves. Throughout the you sneak around the room stealing peoples drinks as you neither of you were allowed back into the kitchen to make yourself one. You slowly become so drunk that you were near blacking out but you continue anyway.

At one moment when Jimin was doing a particularly funny dance to a S Club 7 song and you were doubled over laughing, tears in your eyes, the music cuts out. Jimin abruptly stops, looking around.

“Hey, why’d you do that? I was doing some of my best dancing just then,” Jimin was looking towards the speakers where Jin is standing.

“If you hadn’t noticed everyone has left. The party has finished. I think it's your bed time Jimin,” Jin replies.

“Me and Jimin aren’t finished though,” you whine at Jin. “We’ll just continue to party on our own. We don’t need anyone else to be here.”

“Come on, let’s get you to bed Y/N,” you feel a hand on your shoulder from behind and turn around only to be met with Taehyung.

“We can go out to a club if you guys don’t want the noise,” Jimin suggests while you look over to him giving a smile and nod in agreement.

“I think you guys have had enough tonight, come on you can party another night,” Jin starts to make his way over to Jimin.

“Or we don’t need music, we can just have a silent disco in here,” you continue, not wanting your night to end here.

At that you are lifted from the ground and you yelp out in surprise as Tae picks you up bridal style. Your eyes widened in shock as they look into his.

“Hey, what are you doing? I said I’m not finished.”

“And I think you are. Let’s go to bed.”

Tae starts to walk towards his room as you look over his shoulder to Jimin with another pout on your lips you give a small wave goodbye as Jimin shouts bye.

Whenever you come to the dorms for a party you normally stay over as it means you don’t have to worry about trying to get home drunk. As you and Tae were the closest you almost always shared his bed, which you were never going to complain about.

When you make it to Tae’s room, he places you down on his bed, the pout still on your lips as he chuckles at you.

“I’m going to go brush my teeth while you get changed. You better be ready and tucked up into bed by the time I’m back,” he says in a stern voice and you mumble an “alright Dad,” at him.

You stay sitting on the bed for a bit considering sneaking out to meet with Jimin but when you hear the distant noise of doors opening and closing and Jin scolding Jimin you realise it's pointless. You drunkenly stumble around the room grabbing your pyjamas and putting them on before jumping onto the bed and tucking the covers up to your neck. Tae walks back into the room in a loose top and shorts. He smiles at you tucked in and you beam back at him.

“You look happier,” he laughs as he turns the lights off and joins you in the bed.

“Well I realised beds are comfy and that I enjoy sleep,” you slur turning to face him.

“Exactly,” you can hear the smile in voice as he turns to face you.

“Did you have a nice night?” You whisper to him after a moment of silence.

“Of course, I missed you though, feel like I hardly saw you all night.”

“Well I was having an epic night with Jimin while you were chatting up some girls,” still pretty drunk the words don’t fully register in your mind.

“What do you mean chatting up some girls?” Tae laughs but there is no humour in his voice.

“Oh you know that beautiful girl, tall, skinny, long curly brown hair –“

“Jade?” Tae cuts you off.

“I don’t know, maybe, who knows how many beautiful women you spoke to tonight.”

“They’re just friends Y/N.”

“Oh you don’t need to explain that to me. We’re just friends too, you can hook up with whoever you want. I was just explaining why we didn’t see each other tonight.”

“Right,” Tae mumbles out and a silence follows.

“Just for the record, I didn’t hook up with anyone tonight,” Tae sounds slightly annoyed when he breaks the silence. “And I mean I could question you about how close you and Jimin were.”

“Me and Jimin?” You laugh, probably a bit too loudly, you were still drunk after all. “Oh my god, me and Jimin? That’s probably the funniest thing I’ve ever heard you say. Good one.”

Tae simply groans at you shifting under the covers.

“Let’s just go to sleep, we can talk more when you’ve sobered up in the morning.”

“Ok,” you continue to laugh at Tae thinking you and Jimin were a thing, but slowly start to drift off.

You groan as you wake up the next morning. Head pounding and dehydrated you reach around in search of water. When your hand finds a glass, you glance at it to check its water and then down it in one. You flop back onto the bed and cover your eyes with your arm. Your mind wonders back to the previous night which you remember in full up to a certain point on the dance floor with Jimin where your memories start to get a bit hazy. You remember Tae talking to that girl and how you started to drink away your loneliness. You groan again as you roll onto your side.

After some time of mentally and physically preparing for the day you fumble around in search of your phone. When you find it you bring it to your face and see that its 9am. You groan again, for no particular reason but that you feel crap.

As you lay staring at the ceiling you start to hear voices in the rest of the house. People clattering in the kitchen and chatting away. You had no idea who the voices belong to but you could assume one was Taehyung as he was not lay next to you. With all the energy you could muster you roll yourself out of bed and stumble out of the room towards the kitchen. You’d had the sense at least to grab your empty glass so you could continue to rehydrate yourself.

“Morning,” you mumble as you enter the kitchen seeing Taehyung, Jin and Hoseok. You immediately head towards the sink and fill up your glass downing it and filling it again, this time taking small sips as you look around the room.

“And how are you feeling today?” Hoseok laughs at you.

“I think this might be the worst I’ve felt after any of your parties,” you state sitting down on one of the stools.

“That good huh?” Hoseok continues to laugh at you.

“And you wanted to continue the party, imagine how you’d now if you did,” Jin looks over his shoulder at you as he continues to chop something.

“To be fair I was having a great time, although I feel terrible it was a great party guys, well done.”

Taehyung walks over to you and places a glass of orange juice in front of you.

“Drink that, it always makes you feel better.”

You smile up at him and your heart pangs. You take a sip of the orange juice and sigh in content.

“As you are feeling so rubbish lets go back to bed and watch some films?” Tae claps his hands together grabbing your orange juice and water and walking off before you can respond. You watch him walk off for a second trying to muster the energy to follow him. When you finally do you smile towards Hoseok and Jin and head to Taes room.

When you get there Tae is already in the bed laptop on his lap as he taps always. You roll in next to him and pull the covers up to your eyes.

“So, what are we watching, please nothing too heavy,” you voice is barely audible through the covers.

“I was thinking Sleepless in Seattle?”

“A classic,” you smile, although he couldn’t see it.

As the film starts you scoot closer to Tae so your head is by his shoulder giving you a good view of the film. You struggle to stay awake throughout the film slightly drifting off at times but wake up when loud noises sound in the film. By the end of the film you try to wake yourself up a bit thinking it was probably about time you headed home. You had stuff to do and some sleep in your own bed would hopefully sort you out. You sit up and take a few sips of orange juice

“So Jade?” Taes voice sounds unusually loud compared to the film.

“Who the hell is that?” You mumble, your mind scrambled trying to recall a Jade in the film.

“You seemed angry with me last night for talking to Jade rather than being with you. I just wanted to say that I was coming to hang out with you but she pulled me over to chat and I haven’t seen her in so long so I just –“

“Tae, you don’t have to explain yourself to me,” you cut him off. Your face heated slightly at the words, you don’t really remember bringing this up with him last night. You remember being in his bed finding something hilarious that he had said about Jimin, otherwise your memory was completely blank.

“That’s what you said last night too. But I still want to say sorry.”

“You have nothing to apologise for. I was drunk, my mind was not with it and I probably had no idea what I was talking about. Hell, I don’t even remember what I said,” you laugh, but you could guess what you had said. You remember seeing Tae talking to the girl and you remember the pain it caused you.

“Ok, as long as you don’t mind.”

“Why would I mind? I had a great night with Jimin.”

“Yeah I know,” he sighed out sadly.

The atmosphere in the room had changed. You could feel a tension and coldness in the air as you both held back feelings.

“So what shall we watch next?” Tae forced a smile onto his face that didn’t quite reach his eyes as he looked at you.

“You know, I think I might just head home.”

“What? But we always hang out after a party. I wanted to make up for last night and do stuff just me and you today,” the smile on his face has dropped and he doesn’t hide the hurt in his eyes.

“I just have stuff to do,” you look away from his eyes as you speak.

“What stuff?”

“I have a busy week, I need to do some cleaning.”

“Well I could help you.”

“It will be boring Tae, you stay here and hang out with the guys today.”

“But I just said I want to hang out with you today, I don’t care what we do.”

“I just… I just think maybe I want to be alone today.”

“What’s up Y/N? Why are you pushing me away? Is it because of Jade?”

“I don’t even know Jade, it has nothing to do with her,” your tone starts to get angrier as Tae pushes the topic. This conversation was not helping your hangover or your heart.

“Well you seemed pissed off with her last night,” Tae hasn’t stopping looking at you for the whole conversation, eyes boring into you trying to read every reaction you gave.

“I wasn’t pissed off at her.”

“Pissed off at me, pissed off at her, it’s the same thing at this point.”

“As I said, I was drunk. I have no right to be pissed off at you or whoever you choice to speak to. We’re just friends, you can speak to whoever the hell you want,” at this you stand up done with the conversation. Tears threatened your eyes as you gathered your stuff off the floor. You could normally control your emotions but this horrendous hangover was making you particularly emotional.

“Y/N,” you hear Tae get up off the bed and start to walk towards you. “Please talk to me. What’s up?”

You breath out as you crouch on the floor. Should you really do this, tell him how you feel. It was probably your fragile state but you were done playing these games. You hated feeling what you were currently feeling whenever Tae spoke to any woman. You couldn’t believe what you were about to say. You stand up and turn around so your eyes were looking into Taes. You could see the worry and hurt in them. You sigh again and look down to his chest, you don’t think you will be able to confess this to his face, too scared of how he might react.

“I wasn’t pissed off at that girl. I wasn’t pissed off at you. I was jealous. I saw the way you looked at her and I wished you looked at me like that.” Tears start to come to your eyes again as you try to hold yourself together. “I know we’re just friends but I don’t know if I can be just your friend anymore Tae. I don’t know how to say this but I like you, I like you a lot more than friends like their friends.”

You don’t dare look up at Taes face but the way his body stiffens and the silence that fills the room says everything that he clearly couldn’t say.

“But you know, I’m not psycho, I don’t just expect you to like me like that back. I just think it should be out in the open if it's affecting our friendship.”

The silence continues and you risk looking up to his face. He is no longer looking at you but the wall behind you. His eyes have glazed over and you can see the shock on his face.

“Anyway I’m going to head off, like I said I have a lot of stuff to do,” you ramble on.

You scramble to gather up your remaining things shoving them in your bag as you almost run for the door. As you reach to tug the door open a hand stops the door from opening.

“I’m sorry.”

You turn around to look at Tae, his hand pressed against the door so his arm is by your head. He is a lot closer than you expected.

“You have nothing to be sorry about,” you whisper out his face so close to yours you don’t see the need to speak any louder. “I didn’t expect you to feel the same.”

“No you don’t understand, I’m so sorry for making you feel like crap.”

The tears you have been holding back slowly start to slide out of your eyes.

“I had no idea you felt that way about me,” he brushed the tears off your face. “You should have said something sooner, hell I should have noticed sooner. Y/N I’m so sorry.”

The tears still continue to stream down your face as you try to take in what he’s saying.

“Kiss me?” He whispers out.

At this you go still. What the hell was he saying? You’d been waiting so long to hear those words and now he spoke them you couldn’t comprehend what he was asking.

He chuckles seeing the confusion in your eyes. He whips a few more tears that escape your eyes and places some hair behind your ear.

“I have liked you for ages Y/N but thought you didn’t see me in that way so didn’t want to ruin our friendship,” he smiles down at you. “Kiss me?” He repeats and this time you smile and nod.

He leans in slightly as his hand travels to your jaw stroking it as his eyes close. You lean up to meet him hands going to his neck as your lips meet. You both moan out as your lips move against each other. He pushes you back against the door so you are trapped with his body pushed up against you. You feel his tongue slide against your lips as you smile. You break away before you can go any further, but rest your forehead against his as you stare at each other.

“This is not how I imagined this happening,” you smile at him.

“Oh and how did you imagine it?”

“Well I did not expect to have the worst hangover in history as I declared my love to you, it's been a rollercoaster of emotions today and its only midday.”

“Your love hey?” He smiles at you.

“Oh shut up.”

He pecks you on the lips a few times.

“Come on, let's get back to that film day. I vote we watch Legally Blonde next,” he takes your hand dragging you back to the bed where you find your earlier position and smile as Tae finds the film.

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lucysweatslove · 2 years

Text

Gonna get real for a min here.

It's a lot of... not great feels here so I'm putting it beneath a Read More. It's also very long; this is just a journal for me to put down feels, not necessarily for other people to read. This could be triggering for people, so also a content warning: calories, weight loss, eating disorders/disordered eating. There's a LOT of number talk in here.

First things first: I'm not currently taking my medication. I'm on Wellbutrin SR (the 12 hour formula, not the instant release nor the 24 hour release), and my current Rx is for 200mg. I find it hard to tolerate sometimes as it affects my physical signs of anxiety- eg, rapid heart rate- but also, long story short, I fainted in November and now my health anxiety is really high. I think I know why I fainted (husband was post-op and got a strong opiate in his IV and I was terrified because it's a scary drug), but I also had myclonic jerks (read: it looked like a seizure) and with all my other health stuff, I'm just... scared? Any time something feels "not quite right," I get nervous.

When my little sister made her comment about my body around New Years, I think I kind of broke a little bit and decided I needed to change my body. Part of this is because I hate the body comments and just want them to stop, and the other part of it... as messed up as it is, I look back on ED me with nostalgia and longing. When you're thin and you have a restrictive ED, people are understanding and kind. When you're fat and have a restrictive ED, you're alone in dealing with it. People expect your ED to be BED (NO shame to those with this disorder!) and seem to short circuit when you correct them. It's like "fat person is eating too much" is the ONLY thing they can think of, and when you say it's the opposite, they have no idea what to do other than invalidate you. "Are you sure?" "You must not be tracking your calories right." "You'll be healthier if you lose weight, so just lean into it." Even celebrating weight loss in general.

It's become a difficult thing for me: I simultaneously want to lose weight while wanting to not care about my body, to just exist in my body, to be able to be celebrated for eating good food and exercising in general. And yet, that isn't something that happens. Anyway, I decided to start tracking total nutrition again, but just not talk about the calories/energy balance part of it. This was hidden, just for me to know, so nobody would comment on it. I opted to use Cronometer instead of MFP because I can track TOTAL nutrition and make sure I was still getting micronutrients vital to my health.

Initially I planned a HUGE deficit. I wanted to go back to feelings of hunger, feeling in control, hoping it would help me feel in control of med school apps. About a week and a half into it, I was like, nah I need to eat more. So I did. I justified it with "I'm still on track to lose 2.5 lbs a week instead of 3.5 a week; by my birthday I'll still be so much smaller!" Initially, I had some struggles- esp in week 2- where I tried to do more Controlling Behavior (eg, not eat when hungry), but overall my goal was, while I wanted a calorie range, it was more important that I a) ate when I was hungry, b) ate a variety of foods and included fruits and veg, and c) hit micronutrient goals as a whole over the course of a week. Essentially, although I was tracking calories, I didn't force myself into a caloric goal, focused more on mindfullness and other aspects of nutrition, felt like for the first time I was getting to the point where I COULD track numbers and be okay with it, not obsessive.

I also started to weigh myself daily again. I've done this many times before, it's never been a real trigger for myself, and honestly it USUALLY helps me put things into perspective. I gain weight one day after a high-volume, high-fiber day. I lose weight one day after not meeting hydration goals. I gain weight one day after eating more carbs after activity and refilling my glycogen. I lose weight after my stomach was really upset. I can handle day to day ups and downs, there's always an explanation not related to fat, but it is still a "body checking" behavior. And then when I look at the weekly trends, I'm not pleased. It's not progressing fast enough based on what I'm doing.

Here's the reality: in week 1, I "lost" 7 pounds. I logically know a lot of this is glycogen and water loss. In week 2, I "gained" 0.8 lbs. I logically know that the prior week was a lot of water loss, and I started eating more. I'm not worried yet, as I know that the large week 1 weight loss has to balance out in the end. In week 3, I "lost" 1 lb exactly. I get a little disappointed; that means in the last 2 weeks, I only "lost" 0.2 lbs. I remind myself- 7 lbs in one week isn't realistic, so it could still be glycogen related, water related, etc. A difference of 8 lbs in 3 weeks is decent! In week 4, I "lost" another 0.4 lbs. At this point I am frustrated. I hovered all week. I try to tell myself- glycogen! Water weight! Bathroom habits! But now I'm average ~2 lbs a week, and I'm getting close to where I should be seeing an actual dip again and I'm not. I've lost weight, but I'm still 4 lbs heavier than where I initially wanted to be at this point.

Enter February. There is a +1.4lb gain overnight. This I am POSITIVE is glycogen- I went to the gym the day before and decided to properly fuel my body with carbs. But where does this leave me? Realizing that the prior lack of weight loss likely wasn't related to additional glycogen, because now it is.

So what do I do now? My math brain plots my trajectory over the last ~3.5 weeks; using daily values, it's about -0.75 lbs per week, and using weekly values over the last 3.5 weeks, it's -0.58 lbs per week.

I freak the every living eff out, because I've been so honest in my food journaling. Looking at the same 3.5 week period, I'm averaging 1226 kcal in/day, 94 g of protein a day. Based on my watch which is imperfect at best, I average 536 kcal/day burned during exercise. If we just assumed I ate at maintenance for daily living (eg, BMR, NEAT, thermic effect of food, etc), that 536 kcal/day would predict more than what I'm losing in this last ~3.5 week period.

So what if I add in the first week, the first large WHOOSH? Daily trendline is about -1.34 lbs/week, and weekly is about -1.74 lbs/week.

Now I expand the nutrition analysis for the whole month, and the short story is I see a purported avg caloric balance of -1344. Extrapolated that's ~2.69 lbs/week, which is... significantly more extreme than the trendlines. Literally DOUBLE when we look at the daily trendline. Logical math brain is looking at this and thinking, where is this coming from?? Let's assume that the watch accounts for both NEAT and exercise, and let's assume that thermic effect of food is negligible. In other words, daily calories burned are only BMR + whatever my watch lists as activity. That would be associated with -1.85 lbs/week. That's STILL higher than what my trendlines plot me at. Which means... what? That my watch greatly overestimates calories? That my metabolism is still so damaged?

Weight is so, so SO highly variable from so many things, and knowing that, I take the day to day with a grain of salt and don't mind the ups and downs. Seeing just the weekly stuff, especially over a period of a month, it's like... I expected something different. I expected a better trend. I expected to not feel stuck where I'm at. I expected to have more rational reasons for any stalling, but I don't.

It's just... discouraging, I think. I have no actual health condition that would be doing this. I've put on so much weight over so long that there shouldn't be any long lasting metabolic damage from my prior ED, and yet, maybe there is. I think back to when my like 5' friend (significantly shorter than I am) dropped 30 lbs in like 2 months and continued to lose weight and now wears an XS and quite literally has a thigh gap, but she's eating cinnamon rolls and going out to eat and literally never works out at all. None of it was intentional, just post-divorce. I think about my other friend who is around the same height and weighs like 90-100 lbs and basically always has except for when she was pregnant and how her concern is getting ENOUGH calories in.

It's all like... why is it that I have to put forth so much effort? Not just more effort to control my shape, but more effort than other people my size and shape because I have to be careful not to slip into ED territory again? And as truly fucked as it sounds... why do I get all the negatives of a history of an ED but none of the social benefits, like people actually listening to you and validating your experience?

#cw eating disorder #cw calories #cw atypical anorexia #cw osfed #cw weight loss #delete later

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kuronanox · 4 years

Text

Childhood promises - Hisagi Shuhei

"Shuhei wake up! It's snowing!" (Your Name) says putting on her torn up shoes while running outside. Rukongai in the winter was harsh and they were poor but it didn't mean they weren't happy.

"I'm coming!" He calls out putting on his robe and touching the white floor.

She was playing with the snow and smiling. He shyly watched. "Come on!" She yelled out and grabbed his hand.

"Ahh!" He protested and stood next to her and she smiled.

"Let's make something!"

They made a snowman and laughed as it fell apart from their poor attempt of it.

"I'm hungry (Your Name)." He says clutching his stomach.

With a worried face she walks back into their house and looks at what they had left. "Here eat this."

It was the last of their rice balls they had.

"But you won't be able to have any."

(Your Name) smiles and gives it to Shuhei anyways. "It's okay eat it."

Looking at the rice ball he broke it in half.

"Thanks." She smiles and eats it in one bite.

Shuhei zones out in the office and smiles sadly to himself. He had missed (Your Name) deeply and regret being a weak friend at the time.

He remembered he thought of her as family, they had no one. Although she was 5 years older than him (Your Name) worked hard for them.

Shuhei remember she worked at a small stall in rukongai and she made enough money for them to live enough to survive. Although they starved from time to time they were happy.

Kensei walks in with papers and places them on Shuhei desk. "Need these done by tomorrow."

"Okay Captain."

Kensei stares at Shuhei and walks out the office. He noticed that his Vice Captain had been spacing out recently but he didn't want to push any matters that were unnecessary.

"Are you okay (Your Name)?" Shuhei asks with teary eyes as he watched her wrapped a cut she got from work that day. "I'm okay thanks."

She smiles and sets down some hot soup she warmed up, although there was no rice today.

"What did you do while I was gone?"

"I played out in the fields with some friends."

"Fun, I'm glad you made it back safe."

"Actually... we were almost killed by a hollow."

"What?! Shuhei you could have gotten killed!"

He looks down and starts to cry. "I know, I'm sorry I was so scared. I couldn't do nothing. It was so big and strong. I didn't want to leave you either."

(Your Name) pulls him to an embrace like a mother would and kissed his head. "It's okay you are safe now."

"I met a Captain, and he saved my life. It made me realize that I wanna be a Shinigami when I'm older. I can take care of us and get strong!"

(Your Name) laughs and ruffle his messy hair. "Okay one day, promise me."

"I promise!"

The next morning they were rudely awakened when their door was knocked down and a group of men came in.

Shuhei eyes frighten as (Your Name) became alert and pulled him behind her.

"Your the bitch that sold us the fake metal." One said and grabbed her harshly.

"(Your Name)!" Shuhei yells and runs after her but she stops him.

"Don't come after me!"

He panics and watches as she struggles to get off the grip of the men. They were dragging her somewhere unknown.

"Leave her alone!" Shuhei screams and grabs the stick to hit the men.

Shuhei was sent flying a few feet in the air as they punched him and his nose bleed. He wanted to cry but he was losing (Your Name).

As they dragged her off Shuhei was left with one other dude as he beat Shuhei black and purple.

Lying on the floor (Your Name) was out of sight as he cried and ran to find her.

He screamed and fell to the ground.

Shuhei grips his hand in a fist as he laid in bed looking at the ceiling. He thought about (Your Name) wondering if she ever survived.

Rubbing his eyes he pushed the tears threatening to fall. She had sacrificed everything for them and he couldn't even save her that day.

The next morning Shuhei walked into the publishing office and greeted everyone with a smile. It was a new day and new opportunities waited for him.

"Me and Renji are giving some rookies a tour of Soul Society wanna join me?" Kira asks him as Shuhei had to pass. "Um nah seems kinda boring but good luck though!"

(Your Name) ended up stuck with a group of new comers like her as they toured the place, the blonde dude was kinda bland and gloomy but he showed everyone the important stuff which was the only thing that mattered.

"What squad do you wanna join?" A girl as her as she looked around amazed at the place.

"I'm not sure yet! I guess any that accepts me!"

Passing all the barracks Kira goes into the editing room. "And this is where we publish all the paper work, stories and headlines. The head of editor and chief is Lieutenant of Squad 9."

Shuhei greets everyone and smiles talking about how fun and hard working the publishers are.

(Your Name) looks at him with confusion. He didn't state his name but he looked familiar to her. "My name is Hisagi Shuhei! I can't wait to see what squad everyone joins!"

"What a minute? That's!"

"Okay everyone follow me." Kira boringly says and walks them out as she turns to find Shuhei but he was already gone talking to a few coworkers.

"I guess I'll catch up to him at another time. He's so grown now."

She smiles knowing that he successfully took care of himself. Although the scar and 69 was new.

"(Your Name)?" Shuhei calls out as she washes the rice for them that night.

"Yes?"

"Will you ever leave me for someone else?"

She tilted her head in confusion and laughs. "What do you mean?"

"Like if a guy came and you liked him."

"No silly, we have each other."

"Promise?"

"I promise! Trust me when you get older all the ladies will swoon for you."

"He's so hot!" A few girls giggled to themselves as they continued the tour.

By night time came they entered a dorm place for all new comers. Tomorrow was the day that they picked their squad whether they wanted to be in it or not.

(Your Name) was placed under the 6th squad, which to her seem pretty good because her Captain was a noble and everyone seemed fairly strong. Although she wasn't nearly as good as a seated officer she didn't mind working her way up.

"Abarai Fukutaicho?" She calls out one day as he turns to her. "Um? Do you know where I can talk to Shuhei?"

"Uh?? You mean like the Lieutenant from squad 9? Are y'all close like that?"

"Yes, I'm his childhood friend. We lost contact a long time ago but I just found him."

Renji was bewildered, he didn't know much about Shuhei past but it sounded a lot like him and Rukia so he couldn't reject her.

"Yeah I'll let him know."

Shuhei was in the middle of a rush when Renji walked in. "Yo! Someone was asking for you!"

"Not now! I'm kinda busy." Shuhei states skimming through the papers rangiku messed up on.

"It's (Your Name) she really wants to see you." Renji says as Shuhei drops the papers and looks up shocked. "You mean it?!"

"Yes, like she's in my squad and everything."

"Where?! Where is she!" Shuhei yells with a big smile on his face as he gets up from his desk.

"Woah woah calm down!" She's over at the fields training-" without letting Renji finish his sentence he made a run for it.

Renji smiles and scoffs. He was happy knowing that the reunion was going to be a good one.

Shuhei saw her with her sword training hard as she sweated and concentrated on her spiritual energy. "(Your Name)!" He yells out as she turns to him.

She smiles and ran towards him as they pull each other in a embrace.

"Shuhei! You're so grown now!" She says and he crushes her with his inhuman strength now. "Well you're so tiny!"

They let go as they both couldn't stop smiling. "How?" He says as she sat on the grass as he took a seat next to her.

"Remember when they took me, I managed to escape but we were so far away I couldn't find the way back home."

Shuhei groans and looks down. "If only I was strong back then, I would have saved you."

"It's fine, you were a kid. I don't blame you."

He smiles softly as she touches his face and he starts to blush. "What happen to your face?" She asks with concern.

"Don't worry, just battles and the 69 is something I got from the man that saved my life. He's actually my captain now."

She laughs and lets go. "Well you succeeded, now you can protect me from now on."

2 years later

"Why don't you tell her!" Hinamori pouts at Shuhei trying to push him into the restaurant.

"Be-because it's weird! She was like an older sister to me."

"But you like her right?" Rangiku jumps in unintentionally popping her breast out as Shuhei looks away in awkwardness.

"Better tell her before someone else beats you to it." Kira adds looking into the restaurant spotting (Your Name) dressed in a nice kimono waiting for a certain childhood friend.

"Come on! Renji even asked Kuchiki Taicho to reserve the best restaurant in Seireitei right now!" Hinamori says making Shuhei feel a bit guilty that Renji made the effort to beg his captain.

"Oh fine fine fine! I was going to do it my own pace but since everyone is telling me to."

Shuhei takes a deep breath and enters the restaurant.

"Shuhei!" She calls and waves him over.

"Sorry I'm late, how was your day?"

"It was good! I can't believe you got a place like this for us!"

Shuhei sweats a bit and drinks some water before answering. "Yeah me too."

"Ahh little Shuhei is so handsome now." (Your Name) smiles and push the messy part front of his hair away from his eyes.

He blushes and grabs her hands with his. "You've grown to a fine lady also... but you kept your promise."

"What promise?"

"Remember when we were little, I didn't want you to leave me for another man."

(Your Name) laughs and covers her mouth with her free hand and tighten her grip with his hand.

"Of course, why would I want anyone else?"

"I wouldn't want anyone else but you (Your Name)." Shuhei confesses as she drops her smile.

They had been through so much she could see a life with him and he could see a future with her. A future with laughter and happiness where they no longer starved or lived poor.

"I'm making enough money for us and I'm strong enough to protect you now. That means I'm the man I told you I wanted to be and the man you deserve to have."

She chuckles and set their hands down on the table as she rubs it softly.

"Always, I don't see why we wouldn't work out. The future tied us back together."

Shuhei grins like the child he once use to be and boldly kisses her from across the table.

"I've been waiting for this for years, our first kiss."

"And many to come." (Your Name) adds with a blush.

#bleach #tite kubo #hisagi shuhei #shuhei hisagi #bleach shuhei #renji abarai #abarai renji #kensei muguruma #izuru kira #kira izuru #momo hinamori #hinamori momo #rangiku matsumoto #matsumoto rangiku #bleach x reader #bleach oneshot #bleach oneshots

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poormeowmeowcollector · 3 years

Text

Oh My God They Were Roommates! Just Roommates

Warnings: mentions of nightmares, smoking, breakdowns and lactose intolerance.

Characters: aro!Bucky ace!Loki (also genderfuid)

Summary: After the end of the Avengers, some kept fighting and some retired. Bucky was too tired to keep going, and he wanted the normal life. But he didn't expect the God of Mischief asking for the same thing

Notes: I made the Bingo! This was so tough to write but I really love the results!

Read On AO3

The Avengers are now in the past, after the Big Battle with Thanos. Some have gone offworld, some keep fighting and some just stop and try to leave a normal life. They are too tired to keep fighting. And Bucky is one of them.

After the battle, and after Steve handed his legacy over Sam, Bucky promised himself a normal and calm life. Sam respected it and asked for no help, even if things go bad. He pays a visit once a week and stays in touch.

Bucky now works in a small coffeeshop, and rents a small apartment. It's simple and cozy, he likes it. And he likes his simple life with his friendly co-workers and nice customers and he even gets laid if he's lucky enough. He falls in love with this kind of life.

One day, on a rainy night of November, he hears a knock on the door. He doesn't bother fetching his metal hand as he crosses the room and opens it.

And he finds Loki outside, wet and shivering. He never liked rain, says that water can compromise his cold resistance.

"Come in, you must be freezing," Bucky opens the door and moves aside. Loki nods and smiles, kicking his boots out after his feet meet the carpet.

And Loki never mentions Asgard. They didn't mention it as much before Ragnarok, but now they act as if it never existed. And suddenly, they make traditional soups.

"Th-thank you…" Loki smiles.

"Don't mention it. Take that thing on, will ya? Settle near the radiator, over the couch, I'll make you something warm to drink, okay?" Bucky replies, pointing at the soaking wet coat Loki's wearing. He makes a small nod and does as he was told, watching Bucky as he fetches his hand and heads to the kitchen. He knows that he shouldn't give him tea or coffee, it's quite late and Loki's an insomniac, so he settles down with chocolate. Well, he has a big sweet tooth, why not enjoy a nice warm cup of chocolate?

He goes back to the couch, smiling just a bit when he sees Loki covered with the blanket like a burrito. Loki takes the cup, holding it to warm up his hands before he takes a long sip.

"Th-thank you, it's q-q-quite g-good," He smiles, his shivering chin making his stutter appear.

"Again, don't mention it. What brought you here?" Bucky relaxes on the other side of the couch, his eyes on Loki. Last time he remembers, Loki was fighting.

"I couldn't move past Tony… it, it went bad, even when I was fighting. All nightmares and flashbacks and I… I think it's killing me. I wanna get out of this, retire. It's just too much, I can't take it anymore," He admits, his voice trembling again but not because of the cold. Bucky reaches out to his hand, a tight grip on it with his fleshed limp. And Loki leaves a small smile.

"And, I thought if you could use a roommate…" He finishes his answer.

"To be honest, it does get a bit boring without some idiots yelling at toasters," Bucky smiles.

"Bread should not be flying!" Loki spits, and Bucky laughs at it. But Loki also lets his lips twist upwards.

"You can stay for how long you want. But we will have to get a bigger apartment, this one has only one bedroom," Bucky answers.

"Let me rest for tonight and it will have a second bedroom tomorrow," Loki eyes the former soldier. He almost forgets about his magic. "But I can settle down on the couch tonight, it's comfy," He smiles. Bucky smiles too, he really doesn't feel like abandoning the apartment, he worked so hard to make it the way it is.

And they start to catch up with each other, while they have the energy to stay up. But they both grow tired and end up muttering goodnight and going to sleep.

For Bucky, it was a normal Saturday sleep, when he knows his alarm clock won't wake him up. But Loki hadn't slept with such peacefulness since Tony died.

~~~

"WHERE THE FUCK DID YOU PUT MY HAIRBRUSH?" Bucky yells from the bathroom.

"WHY THE FUCK WOULD I TAKE YOUR HAIRBRUSH? I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW YOU BRUSH THIS SHIT UNTIL NOW!" Loki yells back from the kitchen.

"LISTEN HERE, YOU LITTLE SHIT. IF YOU EVER DISRESPECT MY HAIR LIKE THA- Nevermind, I found it," Bucky mutters the last few words. And Loki hears him perfectly. Because they are 7 feet apart. They didn't need to yell at each other.

"Good for you. Now stop blaming me whenever you lose something," Loki answers, waiting for the soldier to appear on their viewing field. And he did. But they now sigh and pay more attention to the food they're cooking.

"Alright, I'm sorry," Bucky hums, Loki making only a throaty sound as an answer. "What're you making? It smells nice," He asks, moving towards the kitchen to peek at the pot.

"It's a traditional stew on Asgard, you'll see," Loki smiles, but actually means "no peeking until I'm done".

Usually, Bucky was the one doing the cooking. Loki is a better cook, they use a lot of seasoning and know which one goes where, but they don't like it as much. In fact, Bucky can swear they only cook when stressed, as if they try to distract themselves with the smell of whatever they throw into the food.

And they basically talk through the night, with interruptions when Loki is rushing to the bathroom and returning like they had to give birth over there. At least until they both grow tired and fall asleep, right beside to each other. For the first time in days, no screaming and waking up in the middle of the night occurs.

Bucky sighs, trying to find something else to focus on. Something other than Loki's odd behaviour the last days, with the ongoing silence and numbness. Other than the sudden Æsir cooking. Other than the smoking they pretend it doesn't happen, like Bucky doesn't recognize the smell of tobacco in them. Something other than the screaming he hears in the middle of the night and knows that he can't help because Loki tends to lean towards the fight response and Bucky cannot fight back without hurting them.

And he knows where those things lead to. It's not the first time that Loki started going south after Tony. And the previous one was ugly, by all means. What if this one turns out to be ugly too?

"What are you thinking of?" Loki asks, their voice carefully soft. Bucky tries to appear calm, it's not worth worrying Loki too.

"Nothing special…" He shrugs, avoiding eye contact. But he hears Loki sighing and moving the pot before they walk on the couch and sit beside him.

"Is that why you are so worried? Come on, speak it up. Weren't you saying that we should talk about what is bothering us?" They are still soft, like Bucky's the elephant in the room. They were always like this, prefer to soothe others than speak about their issues.

"I'm just worried…" Bucky admits. This will not end pretty…

"Do you want to say what is worrying you?" Loki sits closer, big green eyes staring at him. The dark circles that start creeping around them making them brighter.

"Nah, it's not worth it…" Bucky regrets it and stares elsewhere, gazing at the asexual and aromatic flags hanging on the doors of the two bedrooms. And Loki makes a small tutting sound.

"You can just say you don't feel like talking, lies weren't needed," They argue.

"Says the god of them," Bucky thinks out loud. He shouldn't have said that.

The room gets cold, something Bucky knows is happening because Loki loses some control of their Frostbite when overwhelmed. They stand up and go back to the kitchen, speaking only to inform him that the dinner is ready with a dead voice.

Bucky follows them with hesitance, waiting for them to fill a bowl with the brownish stew before he serves himself and settles on the chair opposite to them.

The stew is nice. The taste of meat is strong and the seasoning makes it kind of sweet. Not exactly Bucky's taste, but he doesn't mind it. Loki plays with the pieces of meat inside it, his right hand holding his head.

"It's nice," He mutters, hoping he can make a small smile appear.

"It's shit," Loki argues, letting the spoon fall on the bowl as they stare at it with disgust. And then, they cover their face with their hands, their rapid breathing echoing.

"Hey, it's just some stew," Bucky tries to soothe them down but they stand up and pace to their room, the door slammed behind them. Bucky wants to follow, walk in and hug them tight and soothe them down. But it's wiser to give them some space.

He tries to finish his own meal, but his appetite is long gone. So, he empties the bowls back in the pot and washes the dishes, trying to think of what to do. He can already feel the apartment going colder and colder, and it's never a good thing.

Maybe if he finds something to cheer up Loki? They like sweets, maybe a cake. Thank God there's a candy store down the road, it will be maybe ten minutes on foot.

Loki doesn't react when Bucky opens the door and leaves, they probably don't even care. Bucky's lucky enough to find a dark chocolate cake, their favourite flavor, and it's cheap enough to buy it. And Loki is still locked in the room when he returns with the dessert.

"Hey, can you please let me in. Just wanna check on ya, you know," Bucky knocks the door. The handle twists and the door opens after a blanket of frost covers it. But, Loki's magic is like a green light that acts like smoke…

Loki is sitting on the corner of the bed, the room around them covered with a thin layer of ice. They have dropped every illusion, even the Æsir one. They do it plenty of times in an attempt to get used to it, or when they can't control the seiðr. They smile just so, fags showing, as they light out a smoke on an ashtray.

"Will you stand there?" They ask, voice dead. There are no tears in their ruby eyes, not trembling from the crying. They just look numb.

Bucky nods and sits on the other side of the bed, placing the box in front of him and a fork above it. "I thought you would like some cake…" He hums, inspecting Loki as they glance at the box.

"Thank you," They try to smile but their face disagrees. They take the box to their lap and open it, frost appearing on the paper that touches him and the fork.

"So, do you feel like speaking?" Bucky asks. They hate showing it, but they love talking and it actually helps them a lot.

"It's just some homesickness. Don't worry, it will pass…" They shrug one shoulder and take a bite of the cake. Their lips twist upwards, a good sign, and they place the box between them and Bucky, a second fork appearing in their hand.

"Oh, thank you," Bucky smiles and takes it, not minding the freezing cold of Bucky's skin. "So, it's about Asgard or the Avengers," He asks.

"Kind of both, somehow… and, it's also the nightmares, as usual. But they're manageable," They lie. After years with them, Bucky knows when they lie. And, most important, he knows when to demand the truth and when not.

"Well, if you feel like it will help, you can come over for snuggles and emotional support." He suggests. Loki smiles and nods, staying silent as they focus on the cake. Can you blame them? They haven't eaten properly for days. But Bucky does give them a look when he realises how fast they devoured the dessert.

"Wait, did you ask for lactose free?" They ask, after making the box vanish. And Bucky forgot to ask.

"Shouldn't you also ask before you eat the whole thing?" He also asks, his worry about how much Loki's small intestine shall suffer tonight growing.

"So, we are both idiots," Loki comes to a conclusion, finding Bucky agreeing.

"Basically, yes… and, I think I should suffer with you tonight, right?" He asks.

"Definitely, just lay near the wall, you don't want to be between me and the toilet," They respond, freeing the space of the bed they meant. Bucky got his metal hand out, he doesn't like sleeping with it on, and lay where he was instructed to, Loki laying beside him.

#marvellousaces #maholidaybingo2020 #marvel fanfiction #marvel fanfic #Bucky and Loki #Aromatic Bucky #asexual loki #genderfuid Loki #he/they Loki #roomates #but actually not #platonic #marvel fluff #marvel angst

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mcshiiin · 4 years

Text

Title: Not My Energy

Pairings: KageHina

Sypnosis: A short, sad songfic about the two where Hinata lost his ability to fly

Song used: Not my Energy by IV of Spades

[A/n: Thank you for reading! I hope u enjoy huhu]

"I've ran out of reasons, reasons to comfort my mind."

Harbingers of daybreak busted his windows open. With gleaming dark eyes and sleek black talons, a crow stared straight to his soul. A sudden prickling sensation running from his toes began clobbering his body, rendering him paralyzed. Panting... Gasping... Drowning his mind in a sea of sorrow.

"Illusions, delusions. Confusions are running inside."

Hinata, despite sinking down the shallow waters feels as if he's floating mid-ar, going "boing boing". Slowly plummeting down the sea floor, he never hit the bottom. Instead, he landed rather harshly on the plywood surface of the gym. A familiar stinging pain on his palm smiled at him viciously. Taken aback, he grabbed his thumping, hollow chest and inhaled as much air as he could. An unforgiving force clashed against his torso, almost obliteraring him before the ceiling collapsed.

"Pale lips and dark lies has conquered the dreamer's eyes."

Poring dreamily at the honey glazed tree tops with hooded eyes, a sigh escaped from his drought ridden lips. While licking away the parchness on his lips, a worried yet kind gaze cut through him from the opened door.

"Sho-kun, you're going to be alright. Don't worry sweetie, we're here for you."

"Nii-chan! Hang in there. I love you!"

The warmth from his sister's hug dissipated into thin air. The soft caress from his Mom ghosted above his puffed out cheeks. Forcing his lips to curl upwards, he fooled them. Just as how their words of affirmation and consolidation were mere lies to comfort him.

" 'Cause there is something in those eyes I can never find, boy."

"Hinata boke..."

Shoyo swore Kageyama's voice were softer than ever. Terrified to face him, the bed ridden boy looked away. His bones shaking. His muscles tensed up.

"I don't want to dive in those same steel blue orbs..."

He kept his mouth silent. He kept his resolve solid. Then it crumbled down.

A feverish touch was ignited from Kageyama's fingertips grazing atop Hinata's trembling hand. The setter is careful enough not to break him, delicately and softly, he slid his hand and interwined it with his partner's. Shoyo's ribcage shattered, his throbbing heart and strained heartstrings tore it down.

His orbs stung with pain as he stared back at steel blue ones.

"I'm sick and tired of the noices, the voices. Everything seems magical."

"We're here for you, Hinata."

"Call us anytime!"

"I'm sure everything will be figured out by the adults. Cheer up, Hinata!"

"Let's buy popsicles when you're discharged, ne Shoyo?"

"Here's some food for you, eat up. You're getting thinner. Ne? I'm the best senpai aren't I?"

"gET WELL SOON AND WE'LL PRAY FOR YOU!"

"Don't worry too much. Idiots don't get sick, tch."

"Tsukki's right, you'll be okay, Hinata."

"I--no we, are here for you. Don't worry about catching up to class, I can teach you anytime!"

"Get some rest and take care please."

"I won't bother you with my words, Hinata-kun. You'll be okay, I'll pray for it."

"Rest up well, kid."

Everything and everyone seemed to pass by in a blur. Their faces muddled together like a murky pond. Indiscernible. Chafing. Quaint. As if it never happened, as if he never heard anything.

"I'm sorry but there's nothing that we can do..."

"D-doctor no-!"

What? He heard nothing. His mother's face didn't crumple to despair. Her hands didn't ball into a fist. Her lips did not quiver. She never looked at him with those eyes.

No. Natsu is a sweet and clingy sister, her hugging him to death is nothing. She always said that his hands are rough, calloused, and big. They're also warm, and emollient. Maybe that's why she's holding it tight. Oh? Natsu is drooling. He chuckled, overseeing the shuddering figure of his dear sister.

Such an ethereal dream it is.

"And yes, my mind is awakened, dead conscience. Eveyday's a torture for me."

Panting heavily whilst swimming in a sea if sweat, Shoyo is wide awake. But, awake from what? Running away from what, his reality or his nightmares? Scampering to and fro, for what? Just to slam his head on a rock, trying to shake his dreams up.

He doesn't know what's hounding hin anymore.

He run a hand through his thick tuft of hair, unable to get back to sleep. A frown creeping up on his lips as he tries to pry his gaze to his legs. His world stilled. His breathing stopped. His mind blown to smithereens.

It hurts. The seering pain from mid-thigh down to his calf. It hurts, so he screamed.

"No I am not holding on to the darkness, 'cause you're already in my mind."

Natsu must be lying, his hands isn't big at all! She probably hasn't seen Kageyama's slender, setter hands. They look also pretty. Tobio's obviously taking good care of it, he bet that he goes as far as taking it to the nail salon. He's both dilligent and an idiot. He wants himself to be in a perfect condition so he can exert his best every game.

Shoyo wonders what lotion his setter is using. He want to buy one for himself too. How irksome it is to look at your partner's long fingers, perfectly groomed nails (it must be nice to have a manicure once), and mosturized, vanilla scented palms whilst yours is anything like that.

"Hmm spacing out?"

Tobio snaked his arms to his frail waist. Nudging his face deep into Shoyo's neck. So warm. So cool. So comfortable. Too real.

"Nah, I'm barely hanging."

"And if you would walk alone, then just do it. The clock is ticking backwards."

A tall, tall wall looms before him. The view from the top. He wants to see it. But he never can, unless alone.

And now, he's more alone than ever.

"Onigiri, pork buns, curry, what do you want honey?"

He's out in the cold again. Jumping higher, digging deeper, receiving with his face to no end. Wheezing as his body thrives, playing as his blood pulsiates. His heart more alive than before. His grin toothier than before. Hinata Shoyo loving too hard ever than before.

The pure joy from he gets from being with the team. The steam he emitts whenever Tsukishima pushes his buttons as Yamaguchi fell in line with laughing at him. The always fidgetty Yachi and Asahi-san. His superb senpais. That reminds him, he need to ask Nishinoya-senpai to teach him the rolling thunder double. The hardworking second years, the goddess Kiyoko-san, everyone. Even Daichi-san's roaring voice along with Suga-san's refreshing smile.

And of course, the skull-crusher milk boy who knows no word except Boke.

"I'm going alone."

"I ain't got it all, I don't care. You're not my energy."

Extending his arms, reaching with his hands, everyone is too far away.

Lying awake for hours, figuring how to run, how to fly.

Then, his bed decided to swallow him up.

A stringent touch engulfed his throat that produced an acrid cry from his mouth. The need for air is urgent, but his compressed windpipes aches with the mere presence of oxygen flowing through. For a second he thought the hold loosen, then his limbs. were vehemently ripped apart.

As blood splattered, his lower region were mangled.

"Your tears are in laughter while your smile is in despair."

Happiness looks good in Kageyama and Natsu. No doubt, hands down, bets raised.

Their carefree laughter bounced off the four walls of his room. Pearly white teeth are exposed as their lips ae stretched up to a smile. As far as their drinking game goes, Natsu is losing. Yes, they're drinking milk, much to Kageyama's delight.

Shoyo lost a long atime ago and the two milk heads are on it. The way their eyebrows knits together in concentration, noses scrunched up, and cheeks puffed out is a sight to see. You don't get to watch Kageyama with a child that doesn't cry within his mere presence, let alone play with him.

"I can't hold it in! I'm going to pee!"

The shorter ball of fluff ran outside as fast as her legs could carry her. Just a little bit more... three more steps... two... then one. She got in!

Natsu came back to her brother wiping his tears as he cackle like a rooster. He reminded her of the Kuroo Tetsurou that he once mentioned, bedhead, hyena laugh and all. When she glanced to her Kageyama-nii-chan, she was almost blinded. His higantic smiles were presented at her boldly. A soft glow from the dying sun illuminated his face. She can feel the love strongly eminating from these two.

Just as the puzzle is coming on together, someone had to filp the table and topple off the pieces.

Whimpers and hiccups. Rattling and rustles. Disintegrating and decaying. Shoyo-nii-chan is crying.

One end of his lips tugged upward. Blood-curling smirk emblazoned on his dainty face. And as she peek at the door opened ajar, tears came rolling down her rosy cheeks, staining the fabric of her shirt with pure sadness that a child can't comprehend. A younger sister shouldn't see her brother's soul being chipped off like that, you know.

"The poison of your tongue has killed all your truthful words."

His throat is a sand paper being stroked on a piece of wood that produces a nasty sound. It aches. It's painful to shout. It's straining. He too doesn't like sound coming off from his mouth. Disdainful words that tarnishes their bond, lacerating sentences that makes him bleed too.

"I don't need you!"

Yes I do.

"Go away!"

Please stay.

"I didn't like the food. It was awful."

They're my favorite, thank you.

"When I said I don't wan't to it, it means I don't! Don't force me!"

Maybe I'm a bit hungry?

"I AM OKAY. I DON'T NEED YOUR HELP I CAN DO IT BY MY FUCKING SELF!"

I am a lost cause.

"Pale lips and dark eyes has broken the dreamer's lies."

He inaudibly shrieked one morning when he woke up. The world was wet with dew as it sleepily waved back at him. He tried to wave back, but the shock of living in monochrome froze him. Then he tumbled down with a thud.

For a moment he forgot what predicament he's in and tried to stand up only to out balance himself and landed face first down their wooden floor. Natsu, who was never asleep the entire night, came rushing by to her brother's room beside hers. Clearly shocked and bemused at her nii-chan's bleeding nose and busted lip, she stood frozen. A part of her wants to laugh but the other half actually feels bad. And good thing she did, because the next scene was horrifying.

"AAAAAHHHHH!"

"N-nii-chan..."

"SEND FUCKING HELP!"

A soul was broken.

"There is something in your mind you can never find, boy."

Searching. Wandering. Roaming around an unprecedented area.

What was he seeking?

He alwas have thought that it was the adrenaline. His heart beating so fast, so loud that he can hear it through his ears. An energy flowing deep within, tingling his senses, pricking under his skin. He enjoys the rush, the pain, the smile in his teammates' lips.

Yet when he stared at Kageyama, he realized it wasn't.

What kept him alive...

"Im sick and tired of the voices, the noises. Everything seems magical."

"Hinata boke..."

"Nii-chan."

"Sho-kun!"

"HINATA SHOYO!"

...was love.

"My eyes are hiding the pavements of my vacancy. You can't take the power from me."

Kageyama wish he could hold Shoyo tighter. Peacefully zoning out in his arms, a small drool pooling below his mouth, and beautiful long lashes. So angelic and breathtaking.

Yet he still fears poring directly in his partner's eyes for they scream,

"I'm going to eat you alive."

Placing a kiss atop his head, a sigh escaped his lips. Then, honey-flecked orbs dangerously stared at him. A tremble was awaken inside his body.

"I love you."

The both of then were taken aback by his sudden words. Hinata was left in awe, speechless while Kageyama quickly recovered his composure. He came into terms with his feelings finally just right now, it's now or never.

"I want you more than any perfect toss. It's you that I want to hit my balls. We're partners, aren't we? I want to be by your side, holding you, loving you. We'll drink hundred liters of milk, we'll eat as many pork buns as you want. I want to spend my life with you."

"Kageyama-kun..."

"I know it'a sudden but Hina--!"

"Loving means being alive. Being alive is being able to love,

But you see, living, is not my energy."

-FIN

#haikyuu!!#haikyū!!#angst #fanfic #songfic #ivos #karasuno #kageyama #tobio #hinata #shoyo #au? maybe?#kagehina

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jimimn · 3 years

Note

HHFJSLASI YOU AND I ARE JUST PROFESSIONALS WHEN IT COMES TO RAMBLING AND I LOVE IT I'LL MAKE THIS FIRST ASK SHORT SO THAT YOU CAN ADD THE READ MORE AND PUT THE REST UNDER THE CUT SO THAT YOUR FOLLOWERS DON'T HAVE TO DO A LOT OF SCROLLING LMAO - 💫

your brain i love it 😌😌

MISS SHIVI YOU'RE TOO SWEET 🤧💞 HFAKKA JUNGKOOK MADE THE WORLD STOP WITH THAT HAIR DYE AT THIS POINT I'M JUST ✨ manifesting ✨ a selfie of him with that hair and I know for a fact that the moment that one selfie comes out ITS OVER FOR US and OMG IN A BUN??? JDJAKJD I THINK YOURE SPEAKING THE DEVIL INTO EXISTENCE. BLONDE JIKOOK SELCA LETS GO BOYS COME ON DON'T BE SHY 🧚‍♂️🌸

OOOPS THAT IDOL PERFORMANCE DOES LIVE IN MY HEAD RENT FREE THO...ESP ALL OF THEIR GROWLS..CALM DOWN??? JIMIN?? EXCUSE YOU.

AND JUNGKOOK'S OUTFIT WAS SO HOTJFJSLQJDJWKA. I did watch the performances later and can attest that DYNAMITE SLOW JAM IS NOW MY ANTHEM AND BLONDE JUNGKOOK SINGING IT IS DEFINITELY NOT GOOD FOR MY SANITY

CHANEL MODEL!JIMIN MISS SHIVI I AM THINKING MANY THOUGHTS NOW FOR REAL THO HE SHOULD TOTALLY WEAR MORE CHOKERS AND CAN YOU IMAGINE HIM FINISHING A PERFORMANCE ANF THEN RIPPING IT OFF AND THROWING INTO THE CROWD LIKE JSLWLAKF DEATH UPON US ALL!!! Honestly he can wear anything at this point and ummm 🤸‍♀️🤸‍♀️🤸‍♀️🤸‍♀️🤸‍♀️🤸‍♀️ BUT FBKSKA I HOPE THIS ISNT WEIRD BUT I JUST THOUGHT OF JIMIN'S COLLARBONES PEAKING OUT FROM UNDER THE CHOKER AND WE'RE GOING A LITTLE FERAL AGAIN

BODY ROLLS DON'T EVEN GET ME STARTED THERE IS NOTHING MORE ATTRACTIVE THAN HIM NOT ONLY BEING SO HOT BUT ALSO USING PERFECT TECHNIQUE!! AND THAT GAZE BYE I'M SHORT CIRCUITING HE CLEARLY KNOWS HIS POWER AND ISN'T AFRAID TO USE IT aND THAT LOOK GAAAAH 5TH MUSTER JIMIN COME HOME PLS THE FOOD IS COLD AND EVERYONE'S ASKING WHERE YOU ARE (me....I'm everyone) NO NOO DON'T BE SORRY I LOVE IT TELL ME MORE ABOUT YOUR MUSINGS *cups face in hand and leans on table*

AND I AGREE!! TAEHYUNG LOOKING GOOD IN THAT SUIT ONLY SHOWS US THAT THE GODS TOOK THEIR SWEET TIME ON HIM AND LMFAO I MEAN THEY'RE NOT WRONG THO 🤡 IS A PRETTY ACCURATE DESCRIPTION OF US and omg you've got a sister!! that's so nice 💓

LITERALLY ON WITH THAT DANCE BREAK IN A CONCERT WITH JIMIN JUMPING OVER JUNGKOOK WHEN I TELL YOU I UGLY CRIED FOR HOURS AFTER SEEING THAT DURING THE MV PREMIERE I DON'T THINK I'LL LIVE KNOWING THEY DID IT IN A CONCERT and ooooooo you should definitely keep hoping!! We got an I need u performance, so anything's possible!! I got into them with bs&t so it makes me very 🤧🤧🤧 in retrospect but nothing about jimin dancing his jacket off was 🤧 it was more of a 🥵😵🥴🤕🤒 type of feeling LMAO

I KNOW RIGHT I LOVE HOW THEY ALWAYS GIVE US LIL UPDATES EVERYWHERE LIKE "OO I WENT CAMPING" "OO WE ATE BREAD!!" "OOO LOOK WE'RE JUST GOING TO DROP COVERS AND SELCAS SO YOU CAN LOSE WHATEVER LITTLE SANITY REMAINED!!" BUT YES TIMES LIKE THAT WHEN HE TWEETS JIMIN IS THE LITERAL EMBODIMENT OF THE BIGGEST HEART EMOJI

AND FJSLADHK I NEVER TOLD YOU LMAO MY BRAIN 💆‍♀️💆‍♀️💆‍♀️ MY BIAS IS JIMIN!! I MEAN BY THE LOOKS OF IT YOURS IS TOO HE MAKES US ALL SO 💕💓💫💓💗💕🌺🌈💘💓✨💗💓🌸💕💝🌈💓💗 ITS A LITTLE EMBARRASSING HOW MUCH HE MAKES ME FEEL LIKE WOW HOW AM I LETTING A MAN WHOM I DON'T EVEN KNOW HAVE SO MUCH CONTROL OF ME. HE'S JUST... EVERYTHING 🥺 I'M IN MY BREAK AND A LITTLE TOO EMO RIGHT NOW!! BUT I GUESS YOUR BIAS IS JIMIN TOO RIGHT? TAKING BY YOUR LOVELY BLOG AND BRUTALLY HONEST (IN THE BEST WAY!) URL LMAO IF NOT THEM I'M SORRY FOR PRESUMING 🙈🙈 but tell me!! how did you get into them??

(god...I'm just looking and I see I wrote too much I'm so sorry fksjwlfo)-💫

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA i love seeing your asks in my inbox ok they make me very happy 🤧🤧 BLONDE JIKOOK IN A BUN SELCA I AM MANIFESTING!!!!!!!! BOYS JUST OPEN YOUR GALLERY AND DROP THEM SELCAS I KNOW YOU HAVE A LOT OF THEM PLS SPARE SOME FOR US THANX 😭

JIMIN IN THAT IDOL PERFORMANCE HOLY SHIT YES 😳 LIKE EXCUSE ME WHAT KIND OF DISRESPECT IS THAT 👁👄👁 and then in the same week he became small cuddly jimin with a boopable nose during the home performance 😔

istg jungkook looked like a very hot rich ceo of a huge company or sth 😳😳 (which he actually is sdfghjk atleast partially sdfg)

CHANEL NEEDS TO CALL JIMIN ASAP 🔫🔫🔫 AND WHAT ARE YOU DOING MAKING ME IMAGINE WILD SCENARIOS LIKE THAT 😭 ok imagine him smirking the “i know im hot” smirk after he throws the choker DEATH OK ABSOLUTE DEATHHHHHHHH and omg yes his collarbones along with the choker 😳😳😳😳 (and no its not weird asdfghj chill)

AND OMG THAT IS THE BIGGEST PROBLEM RIGHTTTTT!!!! THAT PARK JIMIN IS ABSOLUTELY AWARE OF THE POWER HE HOLDS AND HOW HOT HE IS!!!!! AND HE USES IT JUST THE RIGHT AMOUNT WHICH IS KNOWS IS ENOUGH FOR US TO GO ABSOLUTELY FERAL and he’s such a fucking tease too dear lord i can’t with him 😭😭😭😭😭 AND OMG “*cups face in hand and leans on table*” STOP BEING SO CUTE OKAY WTF I AM BLUSHING HERE 😭😭😭😭

AND YES 🤡 IS DEFINITELY ALL OF US 🤣 i remember waiting for 12 am kst every freaking day for a week before BE dropped and big hit was like “not today you absolute clowns” on all our faces 🤡 AND YESS AAAAAAAA she’s not my own sister though!! she’s my aunt’s daughter. they’ve come to visit us for a week 🥰🥰

ON DANCE BREAK WITH JIMIN JUMPING OVER JUNGKOOK HOLY FRIKKIN YES BUT HAVEN’T THEY STOPPED DOING THAT JUMP IN THE RECENT PERFORMANCES? im sad :(((( BUT YES THAT IN A CONCERT WITH ARMY CHEERING AND FANCHANTS AND EVERYTHING HOLY SHIT CAN’T IMAGINE THE ENERGY IN THE STADIUM DURING THAT 🤯🤯🤯🤯 ARE YOU KIDDING I GOT INTO THEM WITH BS&T AS WELL. i am never ever ever going to be over that song. and yes jimin’s “accidental” jacket flips in bs&t are the reason is why i live and breathe 😌😌 (and simultaneously die multiple deaths) I AM NOT EVEN MAKING SENSE ANYMORE AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

AND OMG I KNOW RIGHT WHEN CHRISTMAS LOVE DROPPED WITHOUT A FUCKING CLUE I WENT !@#$%^&*()&^%$#@q@#$%^&*( BECAUSE I HAD JUST WOKEN UP FROM SLEEP AND /?????? NEW SONG FROM JIMIN??????? THAT FELING WAS JUST HHHHHHHHHHHHHH atleast tae gave us a hint BUT I WAS STILL NOT READY WHEN SNOW FLOWER DROPPED. DAMN I HOPE THEY DON’T DO THIS NO WARNING THING WITH KTH1 AND JJK1 BECAUSE I DON’T WANT TO BE FUCKING SLEEPING WHEN THEY DROP ASDFGHJK AND JIMIN AAAAAAAA JIMIN I MISS HIM SO MUCH CAN HE GO LIVE AGAIN PLS I JUST WANT TO HEAR HIS SOFT VOICE AND SEE HIS EYE SMILE AND FLOOFY HAIR AND TINY HANDS :(((((((

AND OMG YOURS TOO???? 😭😭😭 AND PRESUMPTION WHAT PRESUMPTION OMG OFC MY BIAS IS JIMIN (and six bias wreckers 😌😌) LIKE I HAVE JIMIN IN MY ICON AND IN MY HEADER AND IN MY URL AND I GIF JIMIN MOSTLY SO 😭😭😭 WHAT PRESUMPTION 😭😭😭 and god yes i love every little thing about him 🥺🥺🥺 FROM HIS SOCK DOODLES TO HIM BEING SUPER CLUMSY AND HIS JACKET FLIPS AND HIS SEXY BRAIN AND HIS KIND HEART AND HIM NOT GIVING TWO FUCKS ABOUT GENDER TO HIM GROWLING ON STAGE TO HIS NIPSLIPS I JUST!!!!!LOVE!!!!!!EVERYTHING!!!!! 🤧🤧🤧🤧 AND yes lmao my url ok story time!! so when i made this blog... i didn’t know i’d get into giffing and stuff lol so the friend who got me into bts (i’ll come to that story later) suggested jiminsjacketflip as a url for my blog but i was like nah this doesn’t sound cool so i added a bit of ✨pazzaz✨ and made it flipthatjacketjiminie LMFAOOOOO and ive been wanting to change it for a while now because its so fucking long and my watermark on gifs looks shitty because of that 🤡 but i haven’t found anything as unique as this one yet and i also think that if I change my url people won’t recognize me so im just..... living with this one lmaooooo 🤡

AND OKAY OMG so i got into them at the end of june 2020. My friend anna (who also has a blog and makes a++++ gifs @/lifegoesmon) got me into them. She made me listen to them and the first song i heard was stay gold as far as i remember and then it was BS&T AND GODDAMN THE WAY I GOT FUCKING HOOKED TO THE SONG I KEPT LISTENING TO IT ALLLLLLLL DAYYYYYYY and then she showed me the performance for bs&t and i knew i was a goner 🥴🥴 then I watched chaotic bts compilations and they were so fucking funny and adorable that i went like???? how are they so sexy and intimidating on stage and this adorable and chaotic off stage?😭😭😭 we listened to bts’ discography for like three hours on the first day and she shared her playlist with me and stuff and god I just fell for their music. and then obviously with their dance and then obviously with everything about them 🥺🥺 HOW ABOUT YOUUUUUUUU? WHEN AND HOW DID YOU GET INTO THEM???? (and pls don’t be sorry sdfghjk i love reading your asks 💖💖💖) OH ALSO DID YOU WATCH RUNNNNN???????? WHICH ONES DID YOU WATCH????

#anonymous #replied #💫

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hearteyes-for-killmonger · 5 years

Text

One Night Only 2, Part 6

A/N: This one is a flashback from ONO 1 only it's from Erik's perspective. For @muse-of-mbaku

---

Twenty-three days had passed since Erik had seen Y/N and he was in Ontario, Canada backstage with a cup of hot water, lemon, and honey as he listened to the crowd of thousands. A cough drop rolled on his tongue as he waited. The opening act was a young duo who needed exposure. They definitely had the talent. They performed their asses off living in their moment and he smiled at the energy they brung. The crowd was really feeling them.

(Y/N) I miss you

The message on his phone screen was the same one that had been there for the past twenty days. It may as well have been his screensaver at this point. For the eighteenth time in the day alone, he re-read the three small words in the nearly empty text thread. He could imagine Y/N's voice in his head telling it to him. He could still hear her, thinking of when she yelled after him in the airport. The memory always made him smile.

Don't respond, he told himself. She needs this time to develop who she is and you'll only become her crutch if you respond now.

The truth of the matter was usually enough to get him to put the phone down.. This time, however, despite his best efforts, his thumb hovered on the screen ready to respond. He typed four words before he stopped himself, deleting them character by character. Be strong. You can make it.

Whether he was thinking about her or himself, he wasn't sure, but he knew if he texted her now, they'd never stop talking. She'd never get the opportunity to move on and to grow alone. She'd gone from relationship to depression to relationship. She needed time to live with just herself so that she could discover herself without anyone else's input and find out what it meant to live for only one person, chasing her own dreams and desires.

For her own good, he had to ignore her.

The performance ended with a howl of screams and applause for the duo. The dramatic shift occurred where the music for Erik's set came in and the crowd went wild. It was time for Erik to go on, they were calling for him.

This is for you, he thought darkening the phone screen and running out onto the stage jumping with the mic in his hand.

From now on, everything I do is for you.

---

Ontario, Montreal, Vegas, New Orleans, Atlanta, Houston, Chicago, London, Bucharest, Rio, Lima, Brasilia, Lagos, Accra, Nairobi, Cape Town, Johannesburg, LA, Detroit, Anchorage.

Another stop, another city, another set with him pouring everything out on stage and exhausting himself, sweaty but satisfied. More nights with women throwing their bras and thongs onto the stage and coming backstage.

He's sure to wink at a few women when their eyes meet as he's performing. Their cameras are on him and he knows they'll go back and look at the footage later especially if they plan to post it somewhere. He gives one young lady with long blonde braids the mic watching her finish his lyrics as he bobs his head along with her. The moment in the car with Y/N when his song came on the radio comes to mind as he grins throwing the girl a t-shirt. He must've done that in four different cities. Everytime.. he had to smile because he couldn't stop seeing and hearing Y/N in those girls. He kissed one girl on the cheek and she almost passed out. He had to catch her and hold her for a second until she was okay.

Backstage meets were full of loyal fans, some down to earth and some a little crazy. He could always pinpoint the ones who felt entitled to him simply because they paid for a backstage pass. He was cordial with them, but he refused to put up a front to satisfy their expectations of him. He was Erik Stevens, a nigga from Cali.. and this puffed up image of him that the media sold was just that, puffed up. The ones who could vibe without demanding a performance of a character were the ones he preferred to mix with backstage.

He gave handshakes, dapped up, and hugged those who came on equal footing as souls connecting to the music. He fucked the ones who came as groupies, their love for his music so strong it transferred onto him. Some of them had been attracted to him from day one to the point they actually started listening to his music because of it. Some of them, their intentions from the very beginning were simply to have sex with someone famous. He gave them what they wanted. He fucked them all.. if they were attractive.

He didn't fuck the women with those bright hopeful eyes though nor did he fuck the ones with sad eyes. There could only be one of those for him now. Every time a woman looked up at him like he was her hero it only served as a reminder of that fateful day that forever changed the way he thought about love.

---

"It's been five months... The fuck is she doing," Erik snapped.

He'd long been off tour and yet Y/N hadn't come. He clearly recalled asking her to come to him when they were together. He thought she would. He'd hoped that she would. He wanted her face to be the one he saw once his tour had ended. He wanted her in his bed and in his house. Alas, she had not arrived.

"She doing her.. Ain't that what you told her to do," Corey replied smartly over the phone.

He did, but he ain't expect it to take this long. It had been TOO long. She should've found him when his tour was over. He could've been helping her right now instead of talking to this nigga over the phone. Well, he could still help her... and matter of fact, he would.

He floated her name to a few people in his circle in hopes that they could scout or create opportunities for her. Anything that he could do without overstepping or making it obvious.

---

Nine months and he was still waiting on the woman who'd come into his life and turned it inside out. He read her text message again. It was starting to feel like a fever dream, their time together. It was like living months without his heartbeat. He'd been reduced to checking her social media accounts that he'd gotten hold of regularly just to get glimpses of her, making sure she was doing well. He'd created a separate account just do he could follow her and lurk without her knowing. This way, he didn't have to sweat over accidentally double tapping or hitting the heart. He could also view her lives without his name appearing. This eased his mind because he felt closer to her, but it still was not close enough. He was happy to see her coming into her own gradually and he loved the glimpses into her life, but he wanted to be part of it.

The day finally came when he saw her pictured with another nigga, light skin with freckles like an old banana. Who was that nigga? He dug through the comments and looked for any tags following them until he found the profile. James Porleau.

Porleau. His lip twisted in irritation scrolling through the man's account... also known as Jimmy.

Well fuck you, Jimmy, he thought as he scrolled. He went back to the photo of them together. They'd both posted it and it set off red flags in his mind. Stop it, he told himself. She needs this, and how many women have you fucked? Let her get it out of her system.

That was until a week later he saw that her IG account was suddenly on private and that blew him. Wrong move, babe. Luckily his fake account was already following her so he could still see her posts.

"Corey tell her take her Instagram off private. Can't nobody like or enjoy her shit if they can't access it."

"I ain't even know it was on private.. how'd you know? Damn you a stalker for real, huh?"

"I'm just checking on her."

"Riiight," Corey drags, "... You musta seen Jimmy," he chuckles.

"Who is he anyway?" It wasn't worth pretending he hadn't.

"A placeholder.... She misses you but she need dick to keep her warm at night and you not here. I keep telling you to just pop up on her. That nigga would disappear real quick."

"I can't. She's in her zone right now, growing, and if I pop up she might get distracted. This is all healthy for her...I just don't like that nigga." Looking at the two of them together made him uneasy. "I'm a look into him to make sure. Just to be safe."

"Nigga," Corey laughed on the other end.

"I'm serious."

"They not. They just fuckin around."

---

Fuckin around. Who fucks around like this for months? Y/N and Jimmy seemed to be going strong and there was nothing in Jimmy's past that Erik could hold up or frown on. He was a lawyer and a decent guy it seemed. Inside, he was conflicted. He didn't want them together because it made his heart burn, but at the same time she WAS his heart and he was glad she wasn't alone. There were five photos with him and Y/N together. He swallowed his emotions and continued to scroll.

He could see pictures posted at Corey's engagement party. The shoes he'd bought. He rolled his eyes still not believing he'd bought a grown man's shoes. Mostly, he'd scrolled the feed to get glimpses of Y/N. She looked as beautiful as ever and despite the turmoil boiling in his gut due to the fact that she was still too far away, he was glad to see she had a big smile on her face where she was.

He felt like a fan.

---

"She quit her job," Corey blurted when Erik answered the phone. Erik had just left a meeting with his manager and PR person to discuss some of his most recent behavior. He'd cussed out a white guy who'd bought backstage passes and wasn't satisfied because Erik didn't cater to him. The guy tried to force Erik to pay more attention to him but Erik refused to be treated like a toy. The guy deserved worse than the few choice words he got and Erik made that known when he refused to apologize or do anything to make the situation go away. He simply didn't care. 'Figure it out. I'm not doing shit,' he'd told them before storming out.

"She q-.. Is that good or bad? She need money?"

"Nigga. Who don't need money?"

"I'll say it like this.. Is she in danger of losing her apartment or not eating?"

"Nah nah.. Nah, never that. She getting money from her social networking. She one of them influencers now."

"Oh damn.. Is she happy?"

"Oh yeah. She happy as hell, her lil pickle head ass dancing all over the living room right now."

"She don't know you talking to me right?"

"She in there with Anaya not thinking about my ass. See, “BIG OL FREAK, BIG BOOT BIG OL TREAT.. see they ain't paying no attention."

"Nigga, I slid you that track in secret because you were a Megan fan, damn! Don't make me regret it! It ain't out yet... I gotta get my verse together."

---

The day came where Y/N finally released her own original music, music she'd written and arranged herself. He sat in his Ferrari 488GTB with his phone connected by bluetooth and the music playing through his speakers. He'd been waiting a year to hear her song and now that the time had come, he rested his head against the headrest and let the sound caress his ears. Her soulful, smooth, and angelic voice rode the beat with precision. With the volume up and the sound enveloping him, it felt like she was there and singing directly to him. This about me, he thought with a lazy smile listening to her words. That nigga couldn't make her feel like this.. and I know it ain't about her ex.. Nah, it's definitely about me. The thought had him replaying it and for the next week it was his go to song. He knew every word and could sing it. He often did when he was alone.

From singing covers to her own original music, she'd taken large strides. He was impressed and proud that she'd worked hard to carry out her vision to accomplish her dream. He could not stop grinning whenever he heard her song... and then he heard it in public. He was out and about and he heard it, it was brief, but enough for him to recognize it. His stomach was leaping. He looked around for the source, but it had been so quick. That's my baby. His chest was swelling, heart full. That's when he knew for a fact she'd made it.

---

Erik witnessed the success of her EP and bragged on her where he could, of course not to the point of it being loud or widespread enough for it to get back to her. He was careful not to tempt her into cutting off her progress for some haphazard reunion. Of course, he was still fuckin groupies left and right.

He saw the explosion in her social media for himself, her verified side account so that her main could be reserved for her inner circle. He saw all the plays she got on Pandora, Spotify, iTunes, and YouTube. He could finally Google her and see her on multiple platforms. She was linked to him. Their names were still used together, but she was standing alone as well.

She'd gotten fans and followers. Lotta comments and likes. Aight now.. Drake.. back the fuck up. Along with her fame came the thirst. Hella niggas were liking her pictures and leaving random emojis.

"Ayo Corey, tell me something. I need an update. What's she doing? What she need?"

"I remember her saying she need a signed jersey from Steph Curry. She's really been into basketball lately for some reason. She'd love that."

"How bout I send this size 12 foot up ya ass?"

"You still violent as ever, I see. Ornery... You been getting any cheeks?"

"Groupie pussy don't hit the same."

"Not when you've had that number one superfan pussy!"

"Don't remind me. That bitch was crazy."

"But her pussy was fire wuh'nit?"

"She was fuckin crazy. You almost got sniped for that, sending me crazy bitches. You lucky I been in therapy for so long."

"How was I supposed to know the bitch was nuts, she seemed normal to me, I just thought she was a nice lady."

"Nah. I knew something was off. Shouldn't have fucked her."

"Can't unfuck her, but you can hire extra security."

"Nah. If she come around, I'm a handle her."

"Careful E... you soundin like the old you. I know you wanna keep control n'shit."

"Oh I'm in control. I got security, but if she push me they can't protect her from me but for so long."

"Remember she a woman. Though she a bitch, she a bitch with titties.. I guess you supposed to be more gentle.. because of the titties..."

"Yeah well she ain't finna have no titties fuckin wit me. I was taught to believe in equal rights of the sexes."

Click.

Hm? He hung up. Must've been Anaya or someone who walked in.

---

Erik had seen Corey's wedding photos and short clips and through he didn't comment, he congratulated him ans sent a gift. He lurked Y/N's social media catching up on her photos and videos. He was beginning to forget what she tasted like, but when he stared at her through his screen ge could imagine. He was a ghost haunting her pages. He'd become the very thing he'd warned her against. He was stuck on her.

She hadn't posted yet. Every time he scrolled, it was like Russian Roulette. He had to continuously remind himself to check that he was using the lurking account and not his actual account. Also, he was never sure what he'd find. Sometimes the content filled him with intense pride and joy, but sometimes it hurt. That nigga still seemed to be close to her and it got under his skin. She was supposed to fuck around with him and move onto another one, but this nigga was consuming ALL the time that Erik was sacrificing.

He wanted to get on her live.. it was an impulse whenever he visited her page and she had one. THE NIGGA WAS IN THE LIVE. Given, he wasn't the only one there, but still. Erik's jaw tightened and his eyes shut tightly putting the phone against his forehead before putting it away. He needed to think of something different. He needed to go on with his busy ass day.

---

Another year had officially passed.

Pictures posted of Y/N with her and the Corey's baby smiling and glowing living their best fuckin life. Erik didn't want to be bitter, but he couldn't hello that part of him felt bitter. He was lonely. He could see Corey was happy and flexin with Anaya. He'd found a good thing.

Erik wanted to be happy like that, but he couldn't and it wasn't for lack of trying. No matter how many models he went through, how many groupies he fucked, he was still lonely. He laid in bed with other girls as they were passed out from all the sex, scanning through Y/N's pictures. He still had that photo he'd taken when they were in bed together and he was flipping off the camera. It felt like ten years ago instead of two, but emotionally it still felt like yesterday.

Don't know what you're doing off camera.. Wonder what you're doing and if you really moved on..

I sound insecure right now.

Put the phone down. Turn the phone off.

24 hours. Erik kept it off.

The next morning when Erik turned him phone on, his manager had a lot to say. The main thing being, "You ain't answer your phone."

Erik laughed dryly having just gotten chewed out. What could he say?

"It died," he lied. "What'd you wanna say tho?"

---

Typically, Erik could distract himself and push his feelings aside, but he'd seen something this time that he couldn't push aside in his mind. It was a photo of Y/N and that nigga kissing on the lips, the caption: 'I love this man.'

She'd dropped the L word and Erik couldn't breathe. He looked at the phone staring from the word to the picture. It was a punch in the stomach. Had he been waiting on her in vain? Had she chosen this banana faced bitch? Had she really decided to be with him?

Erik had to sit down. He laid down the phone and gripped at his face which was hot, dragging his cheeks down with his palms, fingers sliding down his face. Facepalm. Her with this nigga AGAIN. He wanted to cry.

They ain't look bad together and that seemed to be a popular consensus based on the comments. It made his eye twitch.

He sighed deeply, his jaw tightening. His head felt like it would pop. She was raising his blood pressure and he had to breathe, blinking as he stared at nothing to calm himself. It didn't look like they were just fuckin. They were entirely too close, spending too much time together to say there were no feelings and now he knew. She loved him.

He stood abruptly pacing the floor of his living room. His ear itched at the entire situation and he scratched wildly in irritation releasing his frustration in a loud, "FUCK."

He needed to jog. Stopping short, he decided fuck jogging, he'd hit the bag. In his home gym, he paced and punched the body bag until his fists went numb with pain to match the confusing and excruciating feeling in his heart. He fell to the floor onto his back, sweat covering his face as he tried to shut down his racing mind, chest heaving.

One time. He'd allow himself to see her one time. He had to see her up close even if it was a goodbye. He looked her up to see her next performance. It was at a club called Sapphire. He laid there on the ground thinking of her song and all the times he'd played it. He was starting to think he was wrong about who she was singing to all along.

---

The performance went without a flaw while Erik stood in the back of the crowded club with his hood pulled up, listening with his ears and saying goodbye with his heart. If she wanted him, he'd fight, but if she wanted that other nigga and he truly made her happy, he'd let her go.

The entire performance, he wished her the best, still more excited for her than anyone when she got nothing but applause and positive feedback. He wanted badly to walk up and grab her hand just to confirm that his eyes still held power over her, her heart, and her knees... but he resisted. He'd have stayed longer, but when he started to get recognized, it became a problem

The first woman to recognize him gaped, her mouth and eyes wide. He signaled for her to be quiet with his finger over his lips. When the third person recognized him, it was time to go. He had to leave before word got out that he was there.

---

"Nigga, you are dumb as hell. Them pictures don't mean shit. They ain't even together no more. You depressed for what?"

"I'm not depressed, I'm working."

"This would all be solved if you'd bring ya ass over here then you'd see for yourself... You should've approached her at the club. She'd have lost her fuckin mind and been with you right now, but y'all both wanna be stubborn."

"Well then if that's true... I'm not gonna rush her or or cut off her relationship. I've BEEN ready. I'm just waiting on her. When she's ready she'll come."

"You finna be waiting a decade."

"Aye.. So be it."

There was a strain that Erik could hear. Corey was the middle point and he was trying hard to keep the two of them connected but there was only so much he could do. Erik felt his frustration, but his resolve was strong.

"..UUUUUGH, Y'ALL GET ON MY DAMN NERVES," Corey groaned.

---

3 months passed and Erik was with his lawyer, manager, and producer reworking contracts that would be re-signed. Apparently, his lawyer was peeping shit he missed, earning his check. Erik figured he'd need a new producer soon. This one was sheisty and he didn't wanna have to threaten him or worse. It was best to work with someone else and this lawyer seemed to be doing well with determining the producer's breach of contract making it void.

"One second," Erik put a finger up walking out of the conference room. Typically, he would never walk out of a meeting that serious, but he saw a name on his screen with a new message from a number that hadn't contacted him in two years.

Holding his breath, he opened it.

(Y/N) I'm in Cali can we meet

@imaginewhoever @goddessofthundathighs @panthergoddessbast @thadelightfulone @misspooh @marvelmaree @youreadthatright @forbeautyandlife @theunsweetenedtruth @bidibidibombaclaat @myboyfriendgiriboy @dameshaemonique @blackpantherimagine @vikkidc @hidden-treasures21 @mysidefanting @hold-me-like-a-heart-beat @syndrlla97 @winteroflife @thotyana-in-this-hoe @texasbama @gingerylimonte @princessstevens @magic-madness-heavensin @wawakanda-btch @scrumptiouslytenaciouscrusade @wakanda-inspired @blackgirloneshots @thegucciwaffle @thiccdaddy-mbaku @drsunshine97 @purplehairgawdess @trevantesbrat @indigoxsummers @cccccx1 @dynastylnoire @iamrheaspeaks @blowmymbackout @fonville-designs @they-call-me-le @theblulife @raysunshine78 @sheisexcellent @blackpinup22

#original #erik killmonger #killmonger #erik stevens #erik killmonger fanfiction #erik killmonger imagines #erik stevens au #erik killmonger imagine #erik killmonger x reader #erik x reader #erik stevens x reader #erik stevens x you #killmonger imagine #killmonger fanfiction

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buckmecaptain · 4 years

Text

Violence

(Image is not mine)

Pairing: None, really. F!Reader/OC flirts hard with all 3 men

Word Count: 2168

Summary: After a weapons-smuggling bust involving Hydra, Captain America, The Falcon, and the Winter Soldier chase down the last few bad guys and run into a quirky and rough SHIELD agent whom Bucky has yet to meet. (Cap and Sam have known her for a while)

Warnings: Mentions of weapons, heavy flirting, physical violence and dead bodies. Nothing too descriptive or explicit.

A/N: This is my first fic posted here on Tumblr, and it is in response to a prompt from @stars-inthe-sky who gave me permission to use the prompt/incorrect quote they posted and said they would like to read the fic. Thank you for giving me the inspiration and a bit of a push to write this! <3

SO... I got some anon hate over the "sexual chocolate" line in dialogue between 46 and Sam. It is a reference to one of my favorite movies, which is also the very favorite movie of my dear, dear friend Dashawn- "Coming to America". He adores iced mocha, as well ( calls it his sexual chocolate) and absolutely has the hots for Anthony Mackie. :D That was my little nod to my friend

It was all over but the clean up work. A huge alien tech weapons bust had been made in Midtown Manhattan, the contraband confiscated and most of the criminals -a Hydra splinter cell- apprehended. Time to chase down the stragglers. That task was up to the three-man team of Captain America, the Falcon, and the Winter Soldier.

"Team Cap, head over to fifty-third off Jackson," Sam called out over the comms, "Redwing spotted the last seven hostiles near Schein And Lobell's attorney's office. Headed that way now."

Steve swore under his breath and gestured at Bucky to follow him. "Repeat, Sam. You said Schein and Lobell's?"

"Yeah, yeah, I know. Better move it," the Falcon confirmed as he soared overhead.

"C'mon, Buck, gotta hurry," Steve urged.

Puzzled at his friend's burst of urgency, Bucky nodded and turned to follow. "What would Hydra want with a lawyer's office?"

"It's not the lawyers they're after, pal. It's a couple of doors down that concerns me, and we need them alive for questioning," came the terse reply.

Shrugging, Bucky picked up his pace, and within moments both soldiers rounded the corner of Fifty-third Avenue. Steve came to a sudden stop, almost causing his teammate to crash into him from behind just as the Falcon dropped down beside them.

"What the hell?" Bucky drew his pistol as they surveyed the scene before them: Five Hydra operatives in black tactical gear were lying on the street, unmoving. He approached and nudged them one by one with the toe of his boot.

"Dead. One shot each. Sniper's accuracy," he ascertained.

The Captain immediately whirled around, scanning the rooftops for shooters. "You see anyone above as you were flying in, Sam?"

"Nah, man. Complete silence. It's Forty-six. This... this could be bad, Cap. Seven is not a small number when we're talking about trained Hydra agents." he warned, gazing at the shop in front of which the agents were lying. Kitty's Sweets.

"Oh boy," Steve exhaled loudly, hanging his head. "Get ready." He squared his shoulders and faced the shop, Sam shaking his head and grinning at his side.

Bucky readied himself and his weapon. Just as he opened his mouth to acknowledge the order, the huge plate glass window of the shopfront exploded outward, slivers spraying in all directions, followed by the body of another Hydra operative.

Captain America led the charge, shield raised, and the three Avengers burst into the bakery. As expected, the interior of the once adorable sweet shop was a mess; pastel-painted tables and chairs broken and scattered all over the dining space, cash register and displays overturned, glass and bits of baked goods and blood splattered everywhere.

In the midst of the chaos was a strong, curvy woman in an adorable lavender and baby pink striped retro waitress uniform - short and ruffled, complete with an apron- standing over the seventh Hydra agent, her right hand fisted in his tactical vest and the left landing backhand after backhand.

She. Was. Pissed.

"Do you have ANY idea," she snarled, "how long it took me to decorate six dozen gourmet cupcakes?" SLAP! "It takes patience!" SLAP. "Talent!" SLAP. "Energy! "SLAP. "Did I mention talent?" SLAP SLAP. "And YOU, you fucker.... you busted in here and tried to stab me." SLAP. "Then your clumsy ass slammed into the case and smashed' SLAP "them" SLAP "ALL!"

Seething, chest heaving with, she swung her right arm behind her, forefinger raised in a "Be right with you" gesture toward the three Avengers, then dropped hard onto one knee on the agent's crotch. As he gasped and cried out from the pain, she landed a hard punch to his nose. Smirking at the sound of crunching bone, she stood and turned to face the newcomers.

"Okay, fellahs. This one is still in decent enough shape to take in for questioning."

Bucky, mouth agape, muttered to no one in particular, "God, I love that in a woman."

Sam side-eyed him and smirked. "What, Passion?"

The long-haired soldier shook his head. "Violence."

Steve stepped toward her and nodded. "Agent Forty-six, always a pleasure."

Forty-six chuckled and smoothed back her wildly disheveled hair. Generous cupid's bow lips turned up and her lashes fluttered coquettishly. "It could be a pleasure. I mean, I've offered but you never take me up on it."

Steve blushed and cleared his throat. "Wanna fill us in on the details?" he deflected, gesturing to the last intact table in the shop, eyes looking anywhere but at her.

"Sure thing, Cap. Might as well feed y'all while I'm at it. There's still a bunch of pastries that didn't get ruined. Afraid I only have iced coffee though. Fuc--- uh, jerks broke the coffee pot and espresso machine. What'll you boys have?" She rattled on as she busied herself with washing her hands, back to business as if she hadn't just bested seven Hydra operatives without suffering so much as a scratch.

"Big ol' iced mocha. Dark and super sweet, just like me," Sam called out with a grin.

Forty-six laughed. "Sammy, you know in my head I call that drink 'Sexual Chocolate'."

Sam guffawed. “Hey, babygirl, we’ve gotta get together and watch that movie again!” He received an enthusiastic nod and an "It's a date!" in reply.

Bucky's eyes went saucer-wide and Steve facepalmed at the nickname.

"Iced Americano for you, mon Capitan? And you, Mr. Hotness-who-has-not-been-introduced-to-me-yet, what would you like?" As she offered, she turned to face the men and Bucky got his first real look at Agent Forty-six. Even with her hair a mess and makeup smeared, he was instantly smitten, causing him to lose the ability to speak when he locked eyes with her.

"Aw, kitty cat got your tongue, handsome?" she teased, "How about a large iced, extra creamy, lots of sugar, whipped cream with caramel drizzled all over the top? Sticky sweet and it'll keep you awake for hours," she offered with a wide-eyed innocent smile.

Bucky swallowed hard and nodded.

"Yep, that's exactly what Frosty needs. Been ages since he had something sweet," Sam confirmed, fighting back laughter.

Steve glared at Same, then lay his head on the table and groaned. "For the love of Pete, Forty-six. Why are you like this?"

She rounded the counter with two trays piled impossibly high with food and drinks. As she placed the trays onto the table, she reached down and ruffled Steve's hair.

"Well, Captain," she began in a throaty, sultry voice, "I've offered to be any way you want me, so it's your fault. I'm just waiting for your...command." She winked at Sam and Bucky and took a seat.

After a quick briefing on the altercation with Hydra, Forty-six pushed her chair back and regarded Bucky thoughtfully. "So..." she began, leaning back and stretching tired muscles, “James Barnes, yeah? Winter Soldier, now Fist of the Avengers, super soldier, metal arm, best friend of Captain America?"

He found his voice long enough to reply with a quiet "yeah."

"Nice," she grinned, "So is there some sort of restriction in place to join the team? 'You must be this hot to enter', or what? 'The Earth's Panty-droppingest Heroes? Jeezus-please us, Fury cornered the market on-"

"Forty-six, please," Steve interrupted. He sighed and rubbed his temples before continuing. "Yes, this is James Barnes – Bucky, to his friends- and yes he is an active team member now. No, there is no restriction. You know that wouldn't be allowed, especially in this day and age."

She whistled. "Look at you, all PC and stuff. Honey, I was just yankin' your chain. You know me. I'll have all the required forms submitted before nine tonight, don't worry. I'm a capable agent, despite how I might sound." She stood and pushed the chair back into place. "Great seeing you guys again. Bucky, it's a pleasure to meet you. I know you'll be a strong addition to the team." She graced him with a tight but genuine smile and moved to the stock room to check for supplies to board up the window.

Bucky regained his voice and senses after she left. "That's some dame. She always like that?"

"Like what, flirty?" Sam grinned. "Yeah, she's got a mouth on her, she's like Tony in that way, but she's more than capable. Nearly unstoppable in the field. I've seen her accomplish some extraordinary feats, and if you need a marksman she's your woman."

Steve hummed in agreement. "Yes, but she's got a quick temper, and that gets her saddled with the lower-end assignments. Highest kill-count in SHIELD history... as you can probably tell by the bodies outside. That makes her dangerous and a liability."

"Cap, she's more than competent and loyal to a fault," Sam reasoned. "I'd be just as happy for her to have my back as one of you guys. Give her a shot, man."

Heaving a defeated sigh, Steve stood. "You're right. I'll go talk to her."

Sam nodded. "Good call." Turning to Bucky, he smiled slyly and offered, "She's also single, Barnes. Very available. And in case you didn't notice, she's hot."

The soldier coughed and took a long drink of his iced coffee concoction.

Forty-six's rummaging around was interrupted by a throat clearing behind her. Not bothering to turn around, she called over her shoulder, "I hope y'all will take home a couple of big boxes. The baked goods will go stale and I hate for them to waste."

"I'm sorry."

She turned to see Steve wringing his hands, a penitent expression on his perfect face, his shoulders hunched and .drawn in. It made the formidable Captain America look smaller and somehow quite vulnerable.

"I'm sorry I ran out of patience with you, Forty-six. I'm still trying to balance duty and professionalism with basic... human instinct, I guess." He hung his head and shifted from foot to foot. "I'm not judging you for the things you say. I just can't process them quickly enough. I respect you, very much," he paused and took a deep breath before exhaling slowly, controlled. "Sometimes it's difficult to reconcile that respect with bawdy language and sexual innuendo."

As he stared at the floor and the tips of his ears turned bright pink, Forty-six smiled softly. Heart melting for the Captain, she approached him and lifted his chin with a forefinger, searching his eyes with her own. "You're a good man, Steve Rogers. I appreciate you." She placed a gentle kiss on his cheek, then turned back to

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her task, missing the goofy grin on Steve's face.

He helped her carry the plywood to the front of the shop and the four made short work of boarding the shattered window as SHIELD agents removed the subdued Hydra operative.

"Well, that's that," she frowned as she dusted off her hands. "Y'all want to take the boxed goods with you now, or do you want me to have them delivered to the tower?"

"Yes to all!" Sam cheered. "You could just come back with us and crash there for a while. I'm sure the team would love to see you."

Forty-six turned and entered the shop, muttering "Sure, sure they would."

Bucky shot Sam and Steve a look, to which Steve responded with a mouthed "tell you later."

A few minutes later, the four piled themselves and multiple boxes of baked goods into Forty-six's Jeep and were on their way to Avengers Tower. Sam reached over the seat and tugged her ridiculously cute uniform sleeve. "You are keeping the outfit though, right?" He winked at her in the rearview mirror.

She chuckled. "Nah, I don't think these are my colors. Besides, it makes my ass look fat. I've gotta say, I'm looking forward to not having to get up at four in the morning to bake. Another shi- er, crummy gig in the books. Wonder where Fury will send me next?" She pulled over in front of the Tower entrance and turned to grin at the guys. "Home sweet home! See y'all the next time I have to beat some ass. Tell Tony I said 'hey', and nice to meet you, James."

The heroes said their goodbyes and made their way inside.

In the elevator, Sam broke the silence. "Well, as run-ins with Forty-six go, that one was incredibly mild."

Bucky snorted.

"I'm serious! The last time, there was a two-block wide explosion, a half-ton of gummy bears, and an ostrich. Then just when we thought the roof was gonna collapse on-" Sam was interrupted by the elevator doors opening to reveal an agitated Tony Stark.

"I see bakery boxes. Many bakery boxes," he gestured toward them with a wagging forefinger. "What I do not see is coffee, and what else I do not see is my favorite baker. You three had the audacity not to bring Forty-six up here to visit her favorite genius?" He stomped toward the common area as he ranted.

Sam and Steve chuckled as they dropped off the boxes of baked goods, then toward their rooms for showers, Bucky following suit, still puzzling over earlier events.

"Wait!” he shouted, "What happened to the gummy bears and the ostrich?"

There we go. My first, very mild (in all ways) submission to Tumblr. Anxiety is going to eat my face now.

#cap sam and bucky are good bros bamf oc/reader bakery but not a bakery au not really canon compliant mostly fluff #I screwed up the tags omg

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shoujocentral · 5 years

Text

Symphogear S1- Now this is MY kind of anime!

Every once and awhile when I'd log onto Twitter, I'd see people saying "watch Symphogear" accompanied by images from the show. From looking at the pictures, I assumed it was just another magical girl show like Precure but with less magic and more... techno. Oh, and apparently they sing while they fight? Sounds kinda dumb...

Buuuut... I have heard that there's some yuri content? Maybe I'll give it a try. I mean, I'm always open to watching new stuff, even if it's just a silly little kid's show 😅

😳

Well........ color me hooked.

I have to say, this show is not at all what I was expecting in the best possible way. It feels a lot more like a Shounen action show along the lines of Fullmetal Alchemist or Neon Genesis Evangelion than a Magical Girl show (if that's even what it's supposed to be). Today, I'm going to be giving my first impressions of Senki Zesshou Symphogear season 1, which will be spoiler free for anyone who hasn't seen it yet.

Plot:

So what is Senki Zesshou Symphogear about?

In the not too distant future (next Sunday A.D.), Japan is under attack by monsters known as Noises, the likes of which cannot be killed by military weapons. The only thing that can kill them are girls clad in weaponized armor known as Gears, which is activated and powered by singing catchy techno-pop music.

One day, a girl named Hibiki Tachibana is caught in the middle of a battle, and one of the Gear users, Kanade Amou, sacrifices herself to save her. Two years later, Hibiki discovers that a piece of Kanade's Gear was embedded in her chest during the fight, giving her access to the Gear's powers. Hibiki is recruited by the Disaster Relief Squadron, the organization that created the Gears, to help defend Japan from the Noises.

However, Kanade's former girlfriend partner, Tsubasa Kazanari, sees Hibiki as nothing more than an obnoxious, naive girl trying to be Kanade's replacement. Will the two learn to work together, defeat the Noises, and possibly uncover a deeper plot to all the attacks?

Symphogear's plot might not be the most original thing ever; evil monsters attack, teenage girls transform into superpowered warriors to fight them, evil mastermind tries to take over the world, etc. But what makes this story stand out is it's unique approach to the fights. Having the Gears be powered by music, resulting in every fight being accompanied by a song, is either a genius way to amplify the fights, or a genius way for the producers to sell a techno soundtrack.

I was worried that the constant use of insert songs would become repetitive and annoying, but on the contrary, they heightened my enjoyment! The fights in Symphogear are easily my favorite part of the show: fast-paced, badass powers, lots of screaming, and downright brutal at times! Hibiki has officially joined the ranks of my all-time favorite battle cries, right up there with Goku from DBZ and Souma from Kannazuki no Miko.

If there was one thing I had to nitpick, it would be that most of the fights take away the credibility of the Noises. They're supposed to be this terrifying threat to Japan that can't be harmed by the military, but as soon as the Gear wielders show up, they're reduced to nothing more than cannon fodder as Hibiki and her comrades seem to waltz through them without breaking a sweat.

Thankfully, the versus matches between Gear wielders are much more balanced. My favorite has to be Hibiki vs Chris (see above), but then again, any fight with Chris is an absolute win!

Characters:

Hibiki Tachibana

Hibiki is your typical genki girl protagonist: optimistic, hyperactive, naive, and pure. What makes her a more compelling hero, however, is her slow growth into becoming a strong Gear wielder. Unlike most magical girl protagonists, who seem to master their powers after one line of "EH?! What just happened to me?!", Hibiki takes time to learn how to fight. She starts out with the mindset that she has to be Kanade's replacement and thus tries to fight just like her. However, she eventually comes to invent her own battle tactics that work much more in her favor. Mainly, punching the everloving shit out of everything in sight.

Hibiki is, in my opinion, a flat character done right. She doesn't go through any personal growth or development throughout the show (learning to fight doesn't count), but her belief that all humans can get along if they communicate and desire to protect people just because she wants to is the cause for most of the change in the people around her. The world is in a dark place, and Hibiki is the light. She doesn't need to change, because she's exactly what the world needs.

Tsubasa Kazanari

From what I've learned, Tsubasa is a favorite amongst Symphogear fans. Me personally, though, I have a few issues with her character. Now, I have nothing against brooding, damaged characters. In fact, Tsubasa's recovery from Kanade's death and learning to cherish her own life was incredibly engaging... for the most part. Sorry, but I can only take so much edge. Her constant repitition of "I am a sword, I exist only to fight" grew old after the first 10 or so times.

Also, while I love her overall development, I feel that her acceptance of Hibiki was a little rushed. For the first four episodes, she hates Hibiki for carrying Kanade's Gear to the point where she tries to fight her to the death. Then, after another fight sends her into a coma, she has a (extremely gay) hallucination of Kanade telling her to get over herself. Next episode, she's treating Hibiki as if they've been friends the whole time. Did I miss something? Did Hibiki even apologize for saying she wanted to replace Kanade? Did Tsubasa apologize for trying to shishkabob her?!

Development aside, her fighting style is awesome and unique, and leads to the best choreography in the show. Hopefully as I watch more seasons, my opinion of her will improve.

Chris Yukine

Best Girl. No questions. Anyone who disagrees is wrong. Deal with it.

Jokes aside, Chris is my favorite character of the show bar none. Maybe I just have a weakness for evil-turned-good characters, but I adored her "don't take no shit from nobody" attitude and her soft side emerging as the show progressed. And let me tell you, Tsubasa would have no right to brood if she knew what Chris went through as a child. I won't give anything away, but just a few brief images and harsh words were enough get the picture across and tug at my heartstrings.

She also had my favorite Gear and fighting style in the show. If there's one thing that always gets my blood pumping, it's gatling guns and an endless supply of missiles. Seriously, I could watch this girl fight for hours.

Kanade Amou

A moment of silence, ladies and gentlemen.

......

Kanade would be my favorite character if we had gotten more of her. But alas, she has to die in the very first episode. DAMN YOU, PLOT!!!

Even though we get very little of Kanade, she makes it her mission to leave a lasting impression. Her sacrifice at the beginning sets the tone for the rest of the show, and her flashback is the best of the bunch. I got hard chills when she transformed for the first time. Let's just say she's psychotic in all the right ways.

Kanade died for our sins. Remember that... 🙏

Finé

Our main villain of the show. That's it. There's really nothing much else to her. She's cruel, manipulative, and powerful beyond belief, as most big bosses of these kinds of shows are. She was honestly my least favorite part of the show.

Fine's motivation is incredibly confusing on first watch. I had to go back to pause and read the subtitles multiple times to understand her backstory, but maybe that's my fault for being a slow reader. On the other hand, the explanation as to who she is and why she's so powerful comes right out of nowhere and doesn't seem to connect to anything the story had been building up to that point. Also, by the time I understood her motivation and actually found it a little intriguing, she dropped the dreaded "I'm going to take over the world" line. Aaaaand.... all my interest just went out the window.

There is a twist involving her connection to a certain other character in the show that I genuinely didn't see coming, but in the end, it wasn't nearly enough to make up for her shortcomings.

Miku Kohinata

God bless this little angel. Miku is a precious cinnamon roll who must be protected at all costs. Thankfully, Hibiki's got it covered 👍

Words cannot express how much I love this girl. She may be only a supporting role for the time being, but good lord, does she support! It always broke my heart whenever she tried to spend time with Hibiki or talk to her, but the Disaster Relief Squad kept pulling them apart. I know DRS is classified, but Miku deserves better than to have secrets kept from her! Life sucks when your girlfriend best friend is a superhero...

Well, that was a mouthful. There's a lot more characters in this show, but I don't really have much to say about them. However, while we're on the subject of Miku, let's move on to the reason I checked this show out in the first place, and the reason I'm sure most of you read my stuff.

Yuri:

No sooner did I finish this show did I start looking up HibiMiku fanart 😍

I was expecting a fair dosage of yuribait going into Symphogear, but mother of all that is gay, did I get an overdose!

First and foremost, the main ship: HibiMiku. These two are dating. Nothing anyone says will change my mind. They compliment each other perfectly, with Hibiki's energy and Miku's sweetness... HHNNNGGH! IT'S TOO PRECIOUS! I sincerely hope these two get more time together in the next few seasons. Now if only they'd stop with the damn F word...... 😡

Next up, TsubaKana. This one seems more like it was one-sided feelings on Tsubasa's part, judging by how dedicated Kanade was to fighting the Noise. Regardless, you don't just lose all sense of your humanity and self-worth after your "partner" dies. And all that hardcore blushing in the flashbacks and naked cuddling dream sequences... nah, Tsubasa was hella hot for Kanade. Sadly, our lord and savior was taken from Ms. Brooding too soon.

Finally, there's Ryoko Sakurai, the DRS's head scientist. She was initially hinted to be gay, what with her being all too eager to have Hibiki undress and wanting to "pop her cherry" (yes, an adult said that to a 15 year-old). However, after a certain conversation occurred, it seemed more like she was straight or at least bisexual, if all that dirty talk wasn't just teasing.

I've heard future seasons introduce more potential couples, so I'm keeping my eyes open and my yuri goggles on tight 😋

Conclusion:

I enjoyed the first season of Senki Zesshou Symphogear through and through. As someone who enjoyed Akanesasu Shoujo and Magical Girl Spec-Ops Asuka, I have a soft spot for shows about badass girls kicking monster ass and unleashing their inner yuri. Overall though, I think Symphogear might be my favorite of the bunch so far. It has its fair share of flaws, sure, but I think its positives outweigh the negatives by a long shot. If I got this much enjoyment out of the first season, I cannot wait to see what the following seasons have to offer!

Symphogear delivers a fun, action-packed story with colorful characters, kickass fight scenes, head-banging music and plenty of yuri content. Anyone who loves Magical Girls or Shounen battle shows needs to check it out!

Rating: 8/10

Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm gonna go binge Symphogear G. See you next time, my fellow yuri lovers!

#symphogear #senki zesshou symphogear #yuri #shoujo ai #yuri anime #hibiki tachibana #miku kohinata #tsubasa kazanari #kanade amou #chris yukine #hibiki x miku #hibimiku #tsubasa x kanade #tsubakana

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imacrowcawcaw · 5 years

Text

These Dreams (Sanny) 1/3

*Just realized that this is super long and the formatting is a mess so I'm breaking it into three and cleaning it up*

Title: These Dreams

Author (As known on Various sites): Lady Lover- Rockfic, Luluthechoosingcrow - AO3, theladylovingcrow - Wattpad and Deviantart, Tumblr - imacrowcawcaw

Fandom: Greta Van Fleet

Pairing: Danny Wagner/Sam Kiszka, Josh Kiszka/Jake Kiszka at the end

Warnings/Tags: first time, first kiss, smut, frontage, grinding, fluff, attempted humor, discussions of underage attraction

Summary: *No actual underage sex graphically depicted, but it's talked about*

*twincest at the very end*

"'You're telling me that we've known each other, been near inseparable, since seventh grade, and you've never once thought about it? At all? You've had to have thought about giving guys a try at least once, everyone questions their sexuality." Sammy gave him a shit eating grin. He scooted even closer to Danny, so that their knees touched and their noses weren't more than half a foot apart. Danny stopped laughing.'

Author's Notes: Sammy seems to be the instigator in most things, and Danny always seems to be secretly in love (in my stories), but I like it like that lol.

God I finished this at midnight lol

For Helena and everyone else who needs gvf content down deep in their soul like I do

Sorry, it's kinda dialogue heavy

Singing along to Fleetwood Mac gave me the title

*I am marking this as underage because there is discussion of attractions and fantasies while they were underage, masturbation, losing virginity while under 18. But there is no graphic underage sex actually written, both boys are at like 20 or nearly 20 (today era) where I place this. (Also will not be posted on Rockfic because I've made that mistake once before and I respect their rules and the reasons behind them)

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"What if we fucked?"

Danny let his head roll to the side on his pillow so he could eye Sam.

"What?"

"I dunno, it was just a random idea. Like, don't you think it would be kinda fun?"

Danny stared at him, confusion and amusement mingling on his face. This wasn't the weirdest thing Sam had said in, hell, the last half an hour? But, still, the hypothetic had Danny's attention simply because the idea was something he never really thought about - or, at least, never thought would ever happen. A boy had wet dreams and fantasies, they weren't always things he would actually act on.

"I've never thought about it."

Just not gonna mention those dreams. Or the one time he jacked off while sharing a bed with Sam, nose breathing in the scent of his hair and eyes roaming his best friend's sleeping backside. That never happened, okay?

"Really, like never?"

Sam actually looked surprised. He had?

"You're telling me that we've known each other, been near inseparable, since seventh grade, and you've never once thought about it? At all? You've had to have thought about giving guys a try at least once, everyone questions their sexuality."

"Well- I mean..."

To come clean or to not come clean, that was the question in Danny's mind. Sammy seemed totally cool with the idea, though, so it probably wouldn't do him any harm to admit it. Unless this was a prank? Nah, Sam loved jokes but this wasn't his style. He would never pick on someone for something like this, he much preferred messing with Danny in other ways.

"Fine, yeah, I've thought about it. Had a really intense dream in like, eighth, that freaked me out for a while. Didn't know how to deal with it then, ya know?"

"See, I knew it! Everyone thinks about it! What was your dream about?"

Sam bounced on the bed like an excited puppy - which, he was. A cute, fluffy, yapping ball of energy with too big feet who got super excited whenever he met new people, that was Sammy. How could Danny not love him?

"Do you really wanna hear about this?"

He had to know, just to make double sure, that Sam wasn't pulling his leg.

"Yes, I do! It's interesting to think about. And - if you tell me about your's, I'll tell you about mine?"

"Wait, your dream? What? When? How much have you thought about this? Like, being with a guy, or with me? How come you've never said anything?!"

Why was this the first time he'd heard about this? Sam was usually very vocal about everything he was thinking, at least when in private with his brothers and Danny.

Though, he guessed he knew why: it was the same reason he'd never really mentioned his own dreams and ponderings to Sam.

"Well, how come *you've* never said anything?" Sam countered. "And I'll tell you what I've thought about, but later; I wanna hear hear about this dream that freaked you out so bad. What could it have even been?"

"Mr. Oakenstein."

"WHAT?!"

Danny was cracking up at Sam's face, he looked like he'd just been told that Gibson was going out of business or something.

"Please tell me you're joking!" Sam begged. Poor boy, Danny should put him out of his misery.

"Of course I'm joking, doofus! God - Mr. Oakenstein? He was at least seventy five when we took bio! There's no way that - if I liked guys - I'd be into him. He's so wrinkly and hunched and- and *jowly*."

They both shuddered. Mr. Oakenstein's name brought back unpleasant memories of weekly chapter tests (how was it even possible to go through a book that fast?) and frog electrocution, not to mention the mental image of his sagging, jiggly face.

"Would he have even been able to get it up? Like, how long does Viagra take to kick in? You'd just have to lay there waiting and looking at him - which, ugh. That would be a nightmare, not a dream."

"Yeah," Danny agreed, still giggling a little bit, "I didn't dream about him, but it definitely would have freaked me out more if I had. Hey, you still think Miss Marcie is hot?"

Danny was procrastinating, they both knew it, but this was always a fun conversation to have.

"Always, dude. I still remember with, like, perfect clarity the time she had me come in during lunch to go over my test. I looked up and she was *right there* leaning over me reading what I was doing, and I could kind of see up her shirt... man, I was so distracted the rest of the day."

Sam sounded dreamy, lost in his memories of a hot tenth grade teacher.

"I remember that day! You were so distracted after school on the way home, you nearly drove us into a lake. And at band practice you kept messing up, Joshie nearly strangled you with his mic cord."

"Yeah! Man, I was so hard, I couldn't fucking concentrate on anything else except for trying not to cum right then and there. As soon as we called it quits for the day I was in the bathroom; and of course Jake knew what was up and wouldn't stop ribbing me about it the rest of the night."

"Damn, that bad? I mean, she was hot but she wasn't, like, *amazing*, was she?"

"You might not think so, but Miss Marcie is always gonna have a place in my heart. And the spank bank," Sam sighed. They both snickered.

"Well, what about you, hmm?" He asked. "If you didn't like Mr. Goldenstein, then who? Everyone gets hot for teacher."

Sam hummed the lyrics to the classic for a minute, Danny filling in the guitar parts. Neither of them listened to Van Halen that much, but how could you not know that song?

After a little drum solo on his thigh while Sam progressed into increasingly southern banjo sounding guitar noises, Danny stopped and answered.

"I agree, Ms. Marcelina was really hot, but she had NOTHING on Mrs. Bell. Do you remember that red dress she uses to wear?"

"Of course I do! The economy of the United States has never been so interesting!"

Danny snorted. "Dude, you never gave a shit about econ, you just liked to stare at her. Which, okay, I did too. She made that class bareable."

"I'd say she made it a bit more than bareable. And yeah, that red dress was something else,"

Sam rolled onto his side.

"Hey, what if Mr. Goldstein wore a red cocktail dress. Would you go for him then?"

Sam laughed when Danny shoved at his shoulder, shaking with amusement and disgust at the thought.

"You know, I've never entertained that thought, but I am SO glad you brought it to my attention. I'll never be able to *stop thinking about it* now, Samuel."

Sammy gave him a shit eating grin. He scooted even closer to Danny, so that their knees touched and their noses weren't more than half a foot apart. Danny stopped laughing.

Part 2

#Greta Van fleet #gvf #gvf fic #gvf slash #Danny Wagner #Sam Kiszka #Sanny #fluff #smut #humor #first time #kissing #fanfiction #fanfic #my writing #lulucrowproductions #fics

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