#names are a stupid and terrible concept lets get rid of them

[dynamitekansai]

WWE SMACKDOWN (MARCH 29, 2024)

[ganymedesbussy]

WIP: depression *jazz hands*

One of the smaller, but more insidiously terrible things about being a demon was the way that it make you think you deserved it, where ‘it’ meant each and every other terrible thing in your life.

As far as Crowley could tell, it started during the fall — when the ground dropped out beneath you, and the part of your being so central to your identity and sense of self that you didn’t even conceive of it as a part, the knowledge that you were Loved and that you deserved to be Loved, were worthy of it, was ripped out of you with a suddenness more abrupt and than anything you had experienced in your life. That was the central wound around which all demonic traits festered, really: that vast and empty space, the revelation of love and acceptance as things that could be conditional, and the knowledge that whatever those criteria were, you no longer measured up (if you ever had).

For the fallen angels that pulled themselves out of the lakes of boiling sulphur[1], the lessening of external pain only let the internal pain come to the forefront, and as pain as a concept was a relatively new thing, nobody had what you might call healthy coping mechanisms. Some of them lashed out, trying to turn their pain outward, as if by inflicting it onto others they could get rid of it. Some were angry, some were haughty, some curled in on themselves like a boneless ocean creature. Many wept and screamed and pled or demanded to know Why, Mother? Why? and were answered only with celestial silence. Some, more than Heaven would have guessed or that Hell would later admit, tried to help those around them, perhaps hoping that by so doing they could become worthy again, or because of a genuine dislike of suffering, or possibly just out of habit. Crowley had been one of the ones wrapped up in a ball in his own wings, before another demon whose name he never learned came and shook him out of it, healing what injuries they could with dregs of Grace that sparked and sputtered like a hair dryer about to catch fire. He had thanked them, had touched their hands and face in agonized gratitude, and had seen them destroyed at the hands (and teeth, and claws, and blades) of a pack of raging demons they had approached to help.

That had been enough of a lesson for Crowley; he ran, as he had during the actual War, wanting neither to hurt nor to be hurt. If he stayed to the edges of the crowd, he could avoid the more violent of the fallen, but not draw attention by standing alone and vulnerable. And if he found that, when he did eventually run afoul of the captains and lieutenants of the Rebellion and experienced his share of their Wrath, he could hear a voice in his head telling him he was stupid, and foolish, and useless; that he’d gotten too close or too far from where he needed to be, said or done the wrong thing, that the pain he felt now was his own fault, was what he deserved, well. It wasn’t like he could do anything about it, was there?

Over time, the demons settled. The hierarchy of Hell was established, the pain from the boiling sulphur eased, and the odds of being outright murdered significantly lessened. Interactions between demons became less volatile, but after every one the voice told Crowley what he had done wrong, and it was always more than he thought.

Sometimes he used the voice, listened to its advice. If he just said the right things at the right time, was standing in the right place, approached every interaction with the wary distrust of a dog that’s been kicked too many times but hid it so no one knew he was scared — if he listened to the voice telling him not to trust, not to hope, to tell his fellows (and, later, superiors) what he thought they would be willing to hear, he could get along in Hell well enough to survive with only minimal bouts of getting the shit kicked out of him.

[TIME PASSES, CROWLEY FAKES BEING SMART AND CONFIDENT AND ALL THE THINGS HIS VOICE TELLS HIM HE’S NOT]

[IT MEANS HE DOESN’T THINK AZIRAPHALE CAN LOVE HIM THO]

[HE IS A NATURAL OPTIMIST THO BUT SOMETIMES THE VOICE IS LOUD AND WHEN HIS HOPES ARE CRUSHED HE BEATS HIMSELF UP FOR IT A LOT]

[THAT SHOULD HAPPEN NEAR AZIRAPHALE?]

[something about Aziraphale offering comfort as if it doesn’t matter, as if it’s not dangerous]

[something about accepting that because even the veneer of care is so much at that point]

[1] And not all did, never forget. Crowley had often wondered if they were still down there, ever-boiling, or if they’d managed some form of oblivion. More than once he’d gone to stand by the shores of the sulphur lakes, imagining what it would be like to just walk back into them, and found others already there, staring out into blue-white flames. He never spoke to them, and they never spoke to him, but sometimes he wouldn’t see that demon around again, and he’d wonder.

[wavesmp3]

fake title: 'are you happy?'

are you happy? | juyeon x reader | a mess of a concept, vaguely post-apocalyptic(?) | warnings: death, gore

time has a funny way of waxing and waning through your life. it slows and stops for years and years and years. and then it's running past you, a blur of moments painted before you in hues of pink and blue. time was slow when the rekshi came. when they appeared five years ago, stealing the scream from your lips and people from your life. you swear time stopped when they got sangyeon. and sometimes it feels like time hasn't restarted since. like you're still stuck in that moment, the stench of gasoline, the rekshi's screech, sangyeon's. burned flesh smells terrible--you know that now. people, no matter how small, have a lot of blood. you know that too. you learned about amnesia after trauma in a psychology class seven years ago. you wish it'd happen to you already. that you could wake up and forget all of it. every wretched second of the time that hasn't moved since the rekshi took sangyeon from you.

but then again, time isn't always so unbearably still. other time's its quick, like a bullet, like disaster. it's knocking your door down and pushing you against the wall, gun to your head and knife to your throat. time can be faster than any car or ship or aircraft. it's faster than you can run. faster than anyone. but the funny thing about time is that once it does finally start, it doesn't know how to stop.

time re-started, a year after sangyeon and five days after meeting juyeon through a close call with a rekshi that you just barely saved him from. near-death experiences do that to people. bind them together like red threads of fate. "it's a good thing we don't meet a lot of people then," you had told juyeon, five days on the road with him and the soulmate metaphor still falling off his lips.

"why's that?"

"everyday is near death."

he had laughed. and you swear that alone made time start again. a distant ticking of a clock buried under the sound of his giggle.

and time hasn't really slowed down since. it didn't slow when you told him about sangyeon nor did it when he told you about changmin. time doesn't even hesitate when you kiss juyeon for the first time, doesn't stop to breathe when he kisses you back. it doesn't pause when you and juyeon meet sunwoo.

and when the rekshi take sunwoo, the same sickening way as sangyeon, time only seems to speed up.

"no one else." you whisper against juyeon's neck one night, a month after sunwoo. a vow to yourself between the lines of your request to him. a vow to never make yourself feel that pain again. "only us two from now on."

"okay." he whispered back, just as solemnly, just as heartbroken, just as lost. "only us."

the mutual promise is broken by you and him five months after that night. but neither of you could turn away when the little girl asked for help, neither of you could walk away when it was so obvious that she had no where else to go.

but even then, time doesn't slow down. time doesn't stop or break or pause when the rekshi get her too, a year after you both found her. time doesn't wait for you to catch up to it. you want to take your fist and shatter the entire concept. you want to take the entire idea of time in your arms and throw it off the tallest cliff in the farthest corner of the world. you want to be something else altogether, something beyond time. unaffected by it.

things change after the little girl goes. a gut-wrenching realization that lands like a rock in the pit of your stomach when juyeon's laugh no longer manages to bury the ticking clock. juyeon laughs, and you can only wonder how much longer you have with him. it's been three years now, almost as long as you had sangyeon before the rekshi came.

you remember what he said to you all those years ago, when you were both still strangers, before you knew his heart like your childhood home, before his name sounded like prayer slipping off your tongue. you remember how he said near-death experiences bind people together like the mythical red threads of fate. is that what means to be bound to someone? is a soulmate, for all its nuance, simply just the person by your side in the face of death? to stare death in the eyes like an old friend with his hand in yours?

you remember what you said after. how everyday was near-death. and when you said that, you thought you had no more than a year left in you. that if you had managed to survive past the rekshi, you wouldn't have survived your own head. give it a year, you had told yourself a week before meeting juyeon, a year before grief wraps me like a blanket and suffocates me with its falsely warm arms. it had been a dramatic sentiment, you were quite dramatic before juyeon. sometimes you still are. but you believed it. and you kept on believing it until a year had passed. sunwoo still alive and you still alive too. grief hadn't encompassed like you thought it would. instead, it slithered away the way the cold does between february and march. a surprisingly warm day. and then another. and then it's may and you're laying in the sand with juyeon under the sun. sunwoo gone, but still not cold. not the way you were after sangyeon at least. you lay beside juyeon, eyes closed and relishing in the light of the sun, and wondering when grief stopped being a weighted blanket that sat on your chest and threatened to crush your lungs. you wonder when grief became a small presence that sits at your feet, unbothered, until you decide to take it your arms and hold the freezing thing against your cheek and heart. you wonder when grief stopped being the default. when it become choice, not one made to feel sad, but rather, one made to remember.

that day, in the sand and under the may sun, you remember turning to juyeon and saying it was more than soulmates. he was more than just bound to you and especially not by some wavering red thread. he was your air. your water. the sound of laughter. a reason to keep on running after time. someone to hand the cold weight of grief to, passing it back and forth like kids playing catch, someone to hug when you held it for too long. someone to remind you to set grief back down and that it's okay to occasionally forget about the lives that were. about sunwoo and sangyeon. someone to catch you when you spend too long staring at the grief by your feet, someone to push your chin up and tell you to look at the sun. look ahead. look at me. someone to say don't go. someone to stay for.

but that was nearly two years ago. that was before the little girl. before he looked at her and saw what you see in him. someone to stick around for. things change after the little girl, but it's less to do with you and more to do with juyeon. more to do with the fact that the girl is gone and you aren't enough to stick around for.

"stop the car." you say one day, abruptly, the words coming out like a confession. he does. as suddenly as you said it. you nearly slam your head against the dash.

you're out of the car immediately. running through a field of tall grass and white flowers. you run and run and run. it's been five years since rekshi appeared, not much less since they took sangyeon. four years since you met juyeon. three since sunwoo died. a little over one since the girl. you run past those memories, collecting them in your arms, carrying each of them, their burdening weight slowing you down because you can't breathe anymore. so you do the next most reasonable thing. you grab the grief at your feet and swallow it, let it inflate your lungs. then you keep running. the field is infinite like time. but you run, never faltering, ripping out the grass accidently, tearing every moment of the past five years apart. and then you stop. at the edge of the cliff. at the rim of the word. you stand in the face of death and beside time itself. finally you've caught up to it. finally you gather it in your arms, fit the seconds between the memories and throw them all off the edge of the world.

you remember a documentary you watched once. you don't remember when you watched it. you've gotten rid of time. but it doesn't matter how recent or long ago you saw it. you watched that documentary once, and you remember it now, at the edge of the world while watching time fall. the documentary was about buffaloes, how they travel in herds and fall off cliffs together. how they must not know what they're doing. how they must be blindly following the buffalo in front. you wish to be like that now. to run and throw yourself off the side of this cliff and have it not be a choice. you've spent so long chasing after time, that now, it almost feels natural to run off the edge of the world behind it. it feels like the only thing left to do. to follow the one before you and fall.

"don't jump!" you hear juyeon scream from behind you.

"i wasn't going to." you whisper, but he can't hear the lie. he's already running towards you, through the field you just tore through, the same one you just stripped bear. he runs to you like he could hear how much you were thinking about the jump--or more accurately--thinking about the fall.

"don't jump." he repeats, breathlessly, coming to a stop ten paces away from you. too far away. he looks scared. hesitant. as if he knows that if he comes any closer you just might. "please. don't jump."

neither of you say anything after that. you stand facing juyeon and your back turned to the edge of the world. you both stand on a field beyond the rest of the world and above time. you both stand like you're the only two people who matter. and maybe that's not just a stupid simile. maybe that's the truth.

"would you?" you ask finally.

a timeless silence follows.

you step towards him once. twice. a third time. he doesn't move. he stands seven paces away from you now, but it feels like worlds apart. like he's at one end and you're at the other.

and despite the world between him and you, you still hear every break in his voice when he chokes out, "it's just been so long."

he falls to his knees.

and you cross the world to get to him. you've always been willing to.

he cries next to the flowers. face half covered by the grass. you stand above him. wondering whether he wishes he was like a buffalo too. wondering if he's waiting for you to fall so that he can follow. for how long have you both been standing at the edge and refusing to fall off for each other?

"juyeon," you kneel down in front of him, "where did you go?"

"i knew her." he sobs. you stare at him. "the girl. she was from my hometown. she didn't remember me. she was so young, but i remembered her. and i knew her mother and her sister. i knew. and it felt like she was untouched by this world, that they couldn't touch her. she gave me hope. like we weren't just sitting and waiting for death, like maybe there's an end to all this. but she's gone. in my head she was invincible. but still, the rekshi got her. and they got sunwoo and changmin and everyone. and i don't want to wait for them to get you too."

you don't say anything. you sit in front of him silently. waiting for the flowers to soak up his sobs. you wait for him. long enough for your memories to have crawled back up from the edge of the world and take their place beside you. the girl was his sangyeon, a tether to life before. you're beyond time. have spent the past four or so year chasing after it, and finally today you caught up and threw it away. all this time, you thought juyeon was right behind you, running after time after you. but you were wrong. he's been stuck in time since the rekshi got her. and before he could catch up to it, you threw it off the ends of earth. you look behind you. you wait for the time you flung past the cliff to crash. and then you wait for a new clock to start clicking. you laugh, for a number of reasons, but mainly to drown the sound of it.

you laugh again because time is a funny thing. you always thought it waxed and waned, slowed down and sped up. but really, time is a circle. and you're in the center. and time is the only thing standing between you and juyeon.

you take the grief at his feet and place it next to the memories beside you. you hold his frozen grief in your hands the same way he's done before with yours.

"deja vu." he mutters, like he can see what you're doing. but he can't. there is no tangible grief for you to hold. it's a metaphor.

"are you happy?"

he sighs. "i was. i am. it's just--"

"no. juyeon." you take his face in your hands, holding him in your palms. this isn't a metaphor. in a world of things that are, this is real. "are you happy?"

he must hear the clock ticking. he frowns. "are you?"

a/n: this piece got a just a bit out of hand.....whoops

[queenlilith43]

Alrighty so here is my stupid, stupid theory about the Wicked Powers and the Eldest Curses.

I'm adding a keep reading option because everyone will thank me for this later. And it contains serious Eldest Curses and Last Hours spoilers. (YES. I will drag Chain of Iron into here because I want to.)

So I want to talk about what I think the antagonists in the Wicked Powers and what will happen because of it. And how the antagonists will show up.

So who do I think the antagonists are? Whelp, here's the list:

Thule people

Faerie court drama

The Cohort

Lucifer + other permanent threats

I'm going to explain the antagonists and what I think will happen. I will explain how much of a problem I think they will be.

Thule

Well, Janus is going to be in there. He had established himself as a villian from Ghosts of the Shadow Market. He's what Jace could have been if he had stayed under Sebastian's power. That is to say, a very evil Jace.

Janus had been tasked by the Seelie Queen at the end of Queen of Air and Darkness to find actual Jace Herondale. Do we want Jace kidnapped? NO. Will this cause problems? YES.

Thule as a world is a problem. Part of it leaked into our world in QOAAD, causing the warlocks to start to turn into demons. (Including a very cute purple poodle that was Malcolm Fade.)

Shadowhunters can't use their weapons and runes in this world. I wonder if it was able to influence the Shadowhunters in this world enough to stop that.

And Sebastian is still alive in Thule. We know how much of a problem he is. If he ends up in our world . . . We should be worried.

I think Thule can be a problem. It might be a huge problem. It all depends on how easily the main characters can deal with Janus.

I personally want then to deal with Janus and Thule by just yeeting him into a Portal. I can imagine Kit doing that and then dusting off his hands.

If someone can get rid of Thule easily, things will be fine. If Thule isn't dealt with early on . . . Everyone is screwed.

Faeries

We have met the First Heir of the courts. Also known as Kit Herondale. We also have the Seelie Queen, who is very evil, ruling over the Seelie Court. Along with that, Kieran is ruling the Unseelie Court.

And as we know, the Seelie Queen made Janus try and find Jace. So she ties into the Thule plot.

I feel like there is going to be some major faerie drama. Kit is going to have to fight to unite the courts, whether he wants to or not. It is his destiny to do this.

The faeries wouldn't accept Kit as their king, because he's mainly a Shadowhunter. (As we know, Shadowhunter blood breeds true.) I am hoping Kieran emerges as the king of the new courts and is able to have a good life with Cristina and Mark.

Kit is going to have face his faerie side and the powers that come with it. I'm going to love seeing his character develop through all this.

The faerie court drama is going to be in there, and part of Kit's character arc. It is needed, and if Kit and Kieran get rid of the Seelie Queen fast we might not even have to THINK about dealing with Thule.

However, this plot will need at least two books to resolve itself. That means Thule and the faeries will be involved. I'm going to touch on Thule at the very end again.

The Cohort

Ugh, I hate these guys. Especially Zara, who is the one person everyone in the fandom wants dead.

Considering what the Cohort represents and everything that had happened, they are going to reach new heights of evil. That was already in the playing cards, but I just KNOW they'll be worse than we thought they were going to be.

And the Cohort is trying to hurt the Downworlders. Alec is over there, trying to help them, but the Cohort loathes him for that.

I really don't know how important they will be. But when I talk about what I believe a main plot will be, and how Shadowhunter-Downworlder relations factor into it.

Lucifer

This one is where the Eldest Curses ties into the Wicked Powers. And this is what I think is going to be the main antagonist after a certain point.

Before you question me on this, hear me out.

The Shadowhunters have always known they will face an end to the world. It's been an idea since the very first book, City of Bones.

Jace talked about how there were more demons coming in every year, and less Shadowhunters to fight them. This was in the FIRST BOOK. And of course we had bigger fish to fry, but it's an idea that stuck with me.

I feel like even in the Infernal Devices series everyone knew there would be a demon threat so great the world could end. It wasn't as obvious, because Mortmain wasn't an antagonist that posed a large problem. His clockwork monsters were easy to defeat, and it was in Britain, which is technically an island. So they couldn't go they far unless they hopped on a boat and sailed around the world. Along with Mortmain just being a mundane.

In the Last Hours, the idea of a demon threat that could end the world is even more real. In Chain of Gold, we had to deal with demons that attacked in broad daylight, something that had never happened before.

And there was Belial, who might be planning something that messes with their weapons. (Although he won't get far. He's a terrible, even laughable villian who is being set up like this for future reasons.)

Now we have Lilith, who is a danger to this world. With Cordelia as a paladin, Lilith could have enough power to mess with the world. It's more real, but with this being a prequel, we know things will be fine.

Back to the main series, the Mortal Instruments. In the latter half of the series, Lilith shows up, and mentions her past. And this includes Sammael.

Sammael is a Prince of Hell. He poses a threat to the world. He is the one who weakened the wards in the first place with Lilith to let the demons in.

Thankfully, Simon turns Lilith into salt. We don't have to deal with her, but the threat and the demons she knows remind us how fragile this world is.

After Lilith, we have Sebastian. His demons blood makes him unstable, and he created this army of Endarkened Shadowhunters. But was his existence a threat to the fabric of the universe itself? Not really.

It could think our world, but not in the way an actual demon could. He is powerful, but Sebastian loves in pain. The demon blood in his veins weighs him down, and he has weaknesses. Clary defeated him once, and she can deal with Thule Sebastian later.

The Dark Artifices introduced the concept of the world ending. Not with Malcolm, but with Thule. Thule was a real Hell dimension, a place where the demons have taken over. A ruined world, and one where Sebastian rules over the land with an iron fist.

The only way Sebastian was able to rule over Thule was because Lilith showed up at just the right time. And strangely enough, it was shortly after she was lost from our world. Coincidence? Well, it could be, but knowing these books, it probably isn't.

In the Eldest Curses, this idea was introduced just a little on the first book. Asmodeus was there. It was a flash of it, but it seemed like the demon threat was mentioned.

The second book mentioned that idea again, with Sammael showing up. That's right. Sammael, the Once and Future Devourer of Worlds.

He really seemed to show the threat of demons. The way that no matter how hard the Shadowhunters would fight, the demons would win in the end. It said in that book Sammael would destroy the worlds in the end, no matter what.

And oh my god the epilogue. He had all the Princes of Hell in a room. And now, they are going to summon Lucifer.

Why do I think Lucifer will be outside the Eldest Curses? Because he is important.

In the folklore (my inner Swiftie is showing) Lucifer is the angel who started the rebellion in Heaven. He looked into the face of God, and turned away into the darkness. He is a force to be reckoned with.

But what happened to him? We haven't even heard of him in the Shadowhunters universe until Chain of Gold, where he was confirmed as a Prince of Hell. At first, I thought Sammael was Lucifer, because that is one of his names.

But they're two different demons. And one is more powerful.

Because Lucifer hasn't even been mentioned before, I think his sudden existence is going to be in the Wicked Powers, along with the rest of the Princes of Hell.

Belial is being set up as this whiny, sexist demon to make the other Prince of Hell so much WORSE.

The Wicked Powers is supposed to be a threat that the Shadowhunters have never faced before. And the LITERAL DEVIL? Yeah, they've never dealt with a force like him before.

But the only way the Shadowhunters can defeat the demons once and for all is by teaming up with the Downworlders. It's been hinted at. When the Shadowhunters and Downworlders work together, they are able to fight the demons off.

This is where Clary's Alliance rune comes in. Her rune, binding the Downworlders and the remaining Shadowhunters together, and they will fight.

The Cohort is going to hate this. But it's the only way to deal with Thule (which I'm going to talk about in another post) and Lucifer is with the Downworlders.

And Magnus if ping to be important. Every time Magnus is there, the Shadowhunters win.

But one my other theories is that Magnus dies. Because this is the end, and Magnus is in every single book. So for him to die, it would mark the very end.

So I guess Magnus would fight bravely in the battle and then die, to make an end to these books.

Any thoughts on this? Please reblog!

[popculturebuffet]

Static Shock: Shock to the System and Aftershock Review

“You know what? 13 years ago, me and some friends sat in a restaurant all night and daydreamed about the kinds of stories we would tell if we had the chance. We wanted to expand the concept of superhero to include characters that kind of looked like us, who had some of the same background, experiences and dreams as we did. We wanted to create something fun that a new generation would respond to the same way we responded to our childhood heroes -and damn if we didn't succeed beyond my wildest dreams. Today, Static Shock is a household name with millions of fans of all ages (Is there stuff I'd do differently? Yeah, almost all of season four but why nitpick?) Static is the most successful thing I've ever helped create and I'm both proud and gratified that people have taken it into their hearts. “ 

Dwayne McDuffie, Co-Creator of Static and Writer for Static Shock

This review is dedicated to Dwayne McDuffie and Robert L. Washington III.                                                        Rest In Power Static Shock is awesome. I grew up with the show watching it both first run on the WB and second run on Cartoon Network and loved it as much as I did other large parts of my childhood courtsey of DC like Batman the Animated Series, Teen Titans and both Justice League Shows. What makes this unique among the DC Properties is that Static wasn’t really a big name when he got a show. He wasn’t even part of the DC Universe. 

See as I had no idea for probably a good decade, Static actually came from Milestone Comics, a company ran by and focused on african americans. The goal was understandable: While black heroes existed at the time, and there were some fantastic ones like Storm, Jim Rhodes and Steel... these guys weren’t the center of their universes. The big faces of the big  companies, Spider-Man, Wolverine, Hulk, Iron Man, Superman, Batman, Wonder Woman, The Flash.. were white. So milestone was a shakeup of that with the main teams and heroes all being black, from Icon, an alien who’d lived among man but rather than end up in kansas like say superman ended up imprinting on a slave woman centuries ago and has been with us since, who was encouraged by an energetic teenager named Rocket to put on a costume and do something with his powers and his community, Hardware, a tech genius who had his work stolen by a white asshole and wanted to fight back and BLood Syndicate, a group of gang members all caught in the “The Big Bang”, a huge fight between all of Dakota, the midwest city where the comics take place, that ended when the police released a bunch of experimental gas that gave them all super powers. 

As most of you who have watched the show already know, this is where Static comes from. Static was the company making their own Spider-Man, i.e. a nerdy teenager who suddenly gets super powers, in this case Virgil Hawkins who at the prodding of a friend took a gun to The Big Bang to get revenge on a bully. .but ultimately couldn’t go through with it, decided it wasn’t him and got rid of the gun and ran.. and still ended up in it, becoming Static, a young hero dedicated to using his powers to fight other “Bang Babies”.. a term that dosen’t really sound that great and they really should’ve thought through. But Phrasing aside the character was great and I look forward to reading more and only haven’t because I have to buy the issues gradually, but DC is currently re-releasing the individual issues of Static, Icon, and Hardware weekly in anticipation of a reboot of Milestone Coming in May digitally on Comixology at only 2 bucks a pop, and rereleased the original print collections that were long out of print for 10 bucks each, though i’m getting static on it’s own since i’ts really not that much less expensive as it only collects four issues while Icon and Hardware both collect 8, so I can wait a bit there on Hardware and already own Icon: A Hero’s Welcome.. and really need to review it at some point. 

While Milestone’s output was good, at least from the two books i’ve read, with Robert Washinton III, who sadly not only ahs also passed but was fucking homeless for a while  in the 2000′s.. what the actual hell, writing Static alongside Dwayne McDuffie, whose later moved onto animation writing tons of Static episodes all of them classics including the school shooting episode, the first three rubberbandman episodes and both Anasazi episodes. Point is it had good writers and artists and even had a distrbution deal with DC, so they had a leg up on the glut of other comic book companies.. but happened to start at the start of the comic book crash, a huge downturn in sales in the 90′s as the speculator boom, i.e. a bunch of people assuming every number one would be worth golden and silver age money, forgetting a character has to BUILD INTREST and this stuff takes time, and whose attempts to sell fast flooded the market with comics no one wanted,, caused the roof to cave in and with a bunch of assholes pegging milestone as a “Company for black people” rather than you know, a company trying to add fucking diversity and represntation to the comics industry, and that simply wanted a unvierse that was centered around people of color instead of white guys. The company eventually had to shut down, and was left to lisencing.  This is where the show comes in. Producers HAD been trying to make shows based on Milestone for a while, as far back as the mid-90s and the company was was all for it but the closest it got was an x-men style team series using various characters whose first draft was terrible and whose second draft by Alan Burnett, a producer on various DC Animated shows who’d go on to produce Static Shock, that McDuffie and others really liked but sadly did not get picked up. eventually though with presistance Static ended up getting a series and as I said McDuffie went on to write for it though he did not develop it. Some changes went into place naturally to make it work for an early 2000′s kids show and while i’ll probably miss so since again, only read one issue as we go. But due to Milestone coming back my intrest was peaking, hence finally reading the copy of Icon I had to buy from the library years ago due to keeping it overdue but am now EXTREMLEY glad I own as i’ts incredibly rare and really damn good, and wanting to read static, doing so lately since it’s finally on digtiial and again not too expensive. So join me as I give you a shock to the system and revisit this hell of a series to see if it holds up.. which just to cut that short it does and i’m only holding off binging MORE because I want the first two eps to be fresh enough in my head to review properly.. and also go over the various voice actors because that’s a thing with me now and charcter co-creator dwayne mcduffie because he’s awesome. 

As I like to do when covering a series first episodes, let’s run down the voice cast. 

First up is an UTTER LEGEND, and I use the term voice acting legend a lot, and mean it every time and have good reason to use it when I say it, and Phil LaMarr is a GOD in the buisness, having done a metric ton of voice acting roles, and being easily the most proflific black voice actor in animation. He’s also done some acting work, mostly in pulp fiction which I have not seen, but his true staying power and talent is in animation so here’s just the roles I feel are most notable or may not be very notable but i’m bringing up anyway because it’s my list. 

His roles besides Virgil include Lester Payton the Texas Ranger who showed up for one very good episode of king of the hill to be badass and show up the hickish, stupid and very punchable local Sheriff, Gearld’s obnoxious older brother Jamie O on Hey Arnold, Hermes Conrad from futurama, Carver from the Weekenders (PUT IT ON PLUS DISNEY), Axel Foley for exactly one bit in Clerks the Animated Series, but anyone whose seen it will know exactly which one, Micheal on the Proud Family, Black Vulcan on Harvey Birdman (In His Pants), Hector Con Carne and Dracula on Grim Adventures of Billy and Mandy and Evil Con Carne, Jack on Samurai Jack something I didn’t know for decades (and I didn’t know about the carver thing till today though i’ts obvious in hindsight), John Motherfucking Stewart on Justice League and later Steel and Adult Static in the Unlimited seasons, Osmosis Jones on Ozzy and Drix, Bolbi Strogofski on Jimmy Neutron (And yes i’m just as shocked as you are.), Wilt on Foster’s Home for Imaginary Friends, Marcus on Life and Times of Juniper Lee, Bull Sharkowski on My Gym Partner is A Monkey and Also a Sociopath Please Help God My Life is a waking nightmare..... okay the rest of that title is implied but we all watched the same show, we all know in our hearts that was the title

Moving on, he was also, and yes there’s MORE: Maxie Zeus on The Batman, Philly Phil on Class of 3000, Both Robertsons AND Fancy Dan on the Spectacular Spider-Man, Jazz on Transformers Animated, Kit Fisto and Bail Organa on Star Wars the Clone Wars, Gambit and Bolivar Trask on Wolverine and the X-Men, Aquaman I, L-Ron and Green Beetle on Young Justice, J.A.R.V.I.S. and Wonder Man (Simon Williams) In Avengers: Earth’s Mightiest Heroes, Gabe and Carny on Kaijudo: Rise of the Duel Masters (Really miss that game and have been snapping up what cards I can get lately), Baxter Stockman in the 2012 Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (And there’s also an awesome photo of him with 2003 Baxter... the two best together in one place. I got chills), Dormammu (I’ve come to bargin) in various Marvel Shows, Noville in Mighty Magiswords, Zach’s dad Marcus in Milo Muprhy’s Law, Craig’s Douchey Brother Benard on Craig of the Creek, showing he’s clearly come full circle, And Mr. Scully on the Casagrndes. And given It took about two paragraphs to cover all of this, yeah, I MEANT legend. 

Next we have Kevin Micheal Richardson as Virgil’s Dad Robert, and it’s the first time since I started introducing Voice Actors on a show that i’ve overlapped. I already covered him during the second episode of legend of the three caballeros, but for the short version he’s also very acomplished, very damn good and I somehow missed he played the old blind guy in hey arnold> Needless to say the dude is awesome. 

Virgil’s Sister Sharon is played by Michele Morgan who was in the rap group BWP and did some smaller roles outside of this the one exception being Juicy on the PJ’s, which I have not watched much of but REALLY do not like, though i’ll at least give it credit for being a decently long lasted black claymation sitcom at at time when there were, and hoenstly still aren’t, many black animated shows. 

Back to long casting sheets, next up is Jason Marsden, who is one of my faviorites as i’ve realized recently as Ritchie. As I also found out only recently he started on the Sitcom Step By Step and while that show is .. ehhhhhhhhh, he is great in it because he’s great in everything. He also apparently has his own internet variety show which I have to watch now. His roles include Max Goof, ironically given I was just talking about that role a few days ago, Haku in the english dub of Spirted Away, Micheal, the kid being yelled at by a bunch of 80′s cartoons characters not to take drugs in Cartoon All-Stars to the Rescue!, Nermal in the DTV Garfield movies and The Garfield Show, Tino on the Weekenders (SERIOUSLY DISNEY), Snapper Carr on Justice League, Rikochet on Mucha Lucha! for the last season (Why I do not knkow and while I love the guy he was not the right choice), Felix on Kim Possible, Chase Young on Xiaolin Showdown (WHich I did not realize was him and now I do easily his best role and I REALLY should’ve), Red Star and Billy Numerous on Teen Titans, Speedy on Batman Brave and the Bold, Impulse/Kid Flash II on Young Justice, and Fingers on Kaijudo. He hasn’t done as much lately which is a shame but hopefully i’tll pick up again. 

Next up is Hotstreak, Virgil’s brutal bully turned unhinted pyromancer played by DANIEL COOKSY, another actor i’m happy to talk about and another faviorite I haven’t seen much of lately. Daniel was an actor from childhood, playing Budnick on Salute Your Shorts, but he quickly gained a long and storied catalogue of VA Work: His first big roll was as Montana Max on Tiny Toon Adventures and if there is a god he’ll be back for the reboot, Stoop Kid on Hey Arnold, the incomprable Jack Spicer on Xiaolin Showdown, far and away his best role and part of why Chronicles sucked so bad was he was he didn’t get to reprise the role, The titular Dave the Barbarian, Django of the Dead on El Tigre (Had no idea), Kicks utterly insufferable big Brother Brad on Kick Buttowski and apparently he’s back at it again after laying low for a bit as he’s voicing Snag in Long Gone Gultch.. which I already really needed to watch but hot damn, I missed him. Sign me up. 

Frieda, Virgil’s crush and close friend who in the comics was his main confidante and love intrest but here is eventually pushed aside, is voiced by Danica Mckeller whose work didn’t seem all that familiar.. until I found out she was Ms. Martian on Young Justice. Hello, Megan. Very talented and she did get a major role in a dc show eventually so good for her. Can’t wait for season 4. 

So with our major players out of the way,  let’s talk about Dwayne. McDuffie is an AWESOME man and my respect has grown for him more and more with time. A writer and editor at Marvel, McDuffie has a decent resume doing smaller but awesome books, which I got most of for free last year when Marvel was giving out free digital collections due to the lock down, like Damage Control, a sitcom set in the marvel universe about the company that picks up after superhero battles and the logistics and antics that insue and Dethlok, about a pacfist trapped inside a cyborg zombie. He was as mentioned one of Milestone’s founders, and wrote Icon, Hardware and co-wrote the first few issues of Static. He’d go on to a pretty stacked career in animation, writing on this show and Justice League before becoming  story editor and show runner for Unlimited , even making a return to comics as a result writing the Marvel miniseries beyond and an arc of Fantastic Four in which Black Panther and Storm filled in for Reed and Sue while the two of them worked on their marriage after Reed did.. pretty much everything he did in Civil War. He also became head writer and show runner for Ben 10: Alien Force and Ultimate Alien, revamping the franchise a bit, and Alien Force, at least the first two seasons are awesome and I feel people overreacted on the changes. Ultimate Alien is okay, but has it’s problems but the finale was awesome and left the man’s legacy on a high note.. as he sadly passed in 2011 due to heart complications. He is truly missed and produced some utterly amazing stuff whlie he was alive. So on that melacholy note let’s see what happens when his creation hits the tv screen shall we?

Shock to the System:

This episode is written by Christopher Simmons, who is apparently a huge art designer guy.. but i’m not sure that’s the same chirsptoher simmons. Much more notable is the writer of the episode after this Stan Berkowitz, who was showrunner for season 1 and has done a LOT of DCAU work and is suprising talent, having written a lot of awesome Justice League episodes including Secret Society and The Royal Flush One. Point is we’re in first class hands.  Before the episode itself I want to talk about the intro and how it’s unique among DCAU shows. Like most Western Animation the intros for DCAU shows didn’t change much over the seasons with the most I can see is JLU changing up the footage to preview the current episode and later adding Hawkgirl to the intro after her return to the team. I THINK superman the animated series changed some of it’s footage too, but I can’t confrim it and may of just been imagining it. As i’ve talked about on my blog it’s normally a pet peeve of mine, mostly because shows you know, change after season 1, characters get added some one shot characters used for the intro never return, and after a while it can feel dated especially in more recent shows where the status quo is not at all set in stone and things change quite a bit. But sometimes it can be good enough that either the dated elements don’t matter or general enough that you don’t need to change it and i’ts just that good.. and given Batman the Animated Series has both in spades, you can see why i’ts probably my golden standard for intros and after superman the animated series DC mostly followed suit. But being part of the teen superhero boom of the 2000′s Static is unique in that it splits the diffrence: It’s intro gets the character across perfectly like a good intro should starting with Virgil getting out of bed and running a comb across his head before showing off to his sister to bug her and literally running into his dad who hand shim his bag and smiles, silently showing off his family. He then runs to school and runs into some trouble.. and said trouble changes for each intro, with Rubberband Man for season 1, Kanga (Whose name I only know because I happened to run across it) for season 2 and your guess is as good as mine for seasons 3 and 4, though Hotstreak is a constant. They still save some money for seasons 1 and 2 by recycling some animation.. but that’s alright with mea s it was good animation, and the improtant thing is cycling out old villians for new ones, while Season 3 is the only out and out redo to show off Richie taking on the Gear identity, adding about 10 seconds of intro to let him show off.  Seriously it’s an utterly great intro and like the other DCAU intros outside of superman, stuck in my brain. 

The other change that’s ENTIRELY diffrent from the rest of htem is that the music changes each time. The first two have the same formula just with a difrent vocalist and backing track: a superhero theme but with some hip hop beat boxing over it. The first intro is fine enough, not specattcular but stilll god. The second song.. is eh. Not really great and feels like a marked downgrade from season 1 and just dosen’t blend an ocrehstiral superhero theme with the beatbox elements NEARLY as well. The third song though is my faviorite.. even if I HATED Little Romeo as a  kid because I really did not like his nick show, it’s more a straight up rap song, but it has a faster beat that fits the intro better, and Romeo’s bragging fits Virgil’s character and penchant for Spidey quips perfectly. I also find it ironic that the theme that blends in with the dcau the most, the first season’s, is the one from BEFORE they decided to put it in the same universe. Still this season’s intro slaps, I just like the LIttle Romeo one a bit more.  The opening scene is picture perfect. Some masked crooks looting a warehouse are loading some stolen TV’s into a van when suddenly the lights come on one by one above one of the crooks before his tv switches to various channels before going haywire. Cue our heroes’ entrance. Let’s tak ea good look at him

Static’s Costume is awesome. While I prefer the season 3 redesign, and clearly DC agrees as the redeisgn was used for both pre and post new-52 when they used him, and while he’s getting a fresh design for the reboot, said design takes a lot of cures from said outfit. As for how the outfit differs from the comics itself  this is the design he had in the comics

It didn’t change much from the first issue, with the exception of his now iconic big puffy jacket which was added pretty early into the character’s history but I was unaware of that and just assumed he had the bodysuit the whole time. The more you know. But as you can see outside of the cool puffy jacket over a costume the two couldn’t be more diffrent. While the Dakotaverse outfit is more a standard superhero outfit, with some regular clothes touches on top the first cartoon outfit comes off more realistic, looking fantastic, but still coming off as something two teenagers could realistically have thrown together with what clothes they could buy, while still looking awesomely superheroy. IN short it’s perfect and only topped by the season 3 onward look...

But the slicker look, with an even cooler jakcet and the new colors all fitting the lighting ascetic better, but fits: not only has Virgil come along farther since he started, but with Richie now having a genius brain as Gear, he can provide a far slicker, far more professional superhero outfit on the budget the two have.  This show is just great  at costume design. 

So getting back to the episode at hand, Static puts up a huge sign in elecrticy saying “Bad guys here”, PFFFT, and then hides away and narrates that a few days ago he’d be the last person anyone would’ve expected to be a hero. Cue Flashback. 

We meet Virgil Hawkins on an average day: rapping into his razor, getting into a petty argument with his older sister Sharon, as a younger brother myself I relate to this, and talking to his dad who tries to get them to cut that out. We find out his mom has passed via his sister making really terrible eggs and saying that’s how mom made them. Exposition! Though we do get a great bit through this as when his sister gets distracted by her boyfriend calling, he uses the opportunity of her leaving the room to dump the eggs.. after having earlier jokingly prayed to his mom for a way out of breakfast. “Thanks for looking out for me mom” That’s both very sweet and very hilarious. 

This is a change from the comics it turns out as I was utterly flored to find Virgil’s mom alive and well when reading the first issue of Static. Turns out this was a change made during development and one Dwane McDuffie admitted in the interview I got the tribute quote from to not liking as he had a good reason for having Virgil have a nuclear family, as most black families in media at the time were just one single parent and a kid or two with the other having either left or died. He wasn’t too bothered by it as while he preferred what he came up with in the first place, the show DID get some really good stories out of her being gone and didn’t just have her be absent because shut up. Virgil is still working over her death and the way HOW she died ends up playing an important role in this episode and gives Virgil a dislike of guns, as she died to gang violence. So the change wasn’t for stupid or racist reasons, but likely both to keep the character count down while giving them something to work with for storylines. Or it could’ve been for stupid reasons and the writers simpily made lemonade out of that very dumb lemon, either way it ended up working.  Virgil also plans to ask his friend Frieda out. Frieda was a bigger deal in the comics, being Virgil’s friend and confidante as well as his ocasional love intrest, but here while she was inteded to at least be his love intrest here, that sorta fizzled out. As for the best friend role we meet her replacement in Richie, which McDuffie conceded was the kind of change a studio would make swapping out a female character for a male one. That being said the crew made the best of it and Richie is awesome, a bit of an overcompensating dipstick at times, but a good sounding board and pal for virgil and funny as hell too. He was also gay, something only revealed post series by McDuffie.. but unlike say Dumbledore, it’s a bit easier to swallow here: The early 2000′s were an even worse time for gay characters in tv let alone cartoons, and if they couldn’t kiss or have sex scenes on regular tv, there was no way we were getting any representation in a children’s show. So it was largely just hinted at by Richie overcompensating in how “into girls” he was and i’m once again fine with this being word of god as it was literally the best they could do and his counterpart in the comics was also gay, if not as relevant.  Ritch encourages Virgil to work on his opening to ask her out as it’s awkward as heck, hits a bit close to home.. but I do appricate the show just .. having him try and ask her out from the first episode. They likely would’ve drug thigns out a bit granted had they used Frieda more, i’m not blind to the convetions of the time. .but as someone who got the very wrong idea from tv that just waiting around meant a girl would like you eventually, when no you need to actually try even if rejection happens, I honestly wish we had more of this in media than the other garbage morals at the time. 

So he prepares to , not helped by her mentioning guy after guy is asking her out.... but before he can F-Stop, the future hotstreak, shows up.  F-STOP

That being said...... it’s not as bad as the original gangster name for the comic’s version, Biz Money B. Yes BIZ MONEY B

So yeah while F-Stop is no more intimidating, it at least means I can stop laughing. Francis, because I can’t type F-Stop without laughing and this review is already behind, shoves Virgil out of the way and agressively hits on Frieda, even saying “you smell good”, the international sign your a douchebag and also to call the police. Virgil steps up to the guy and gets PAINFULLY slammed into the lockers, something I give the animation team a lot of credit for, as you can FEEL how fucking painful that was. Virgil is saved by Wade, another local gangbanger who in the comics was a close friend of Virgils but here saves him seemingly just because.. seemingly. 

On the way home though Virg’s problems don’t end as naturally, the giant sized asshole with nothing better to do has his goons corner virgil before VIOLENTLY beating him.. off screen but the noises, and the clear brusies including a black eye, on virgil afterwords.. just holy damn i’m suprsied they got away with this but it shows just how horrifing it was and that this is a step above regular bullying, which make no mistake is absoluttley terrible and the series would later do an episode on it and school shootings, into straight up gang violence. Wade shows up again and gets the bastards to flee.. but also makes it clear he can’t keep doing this.. and forces Virgil to meet him at his base under the bridge. And it’s a tense sequence, with Virgil KNOWING this is a bad idea but having no real choice and Wade making it abundantly clear that he wants Virgil to join his crew, and makes a chilling point: while Virgils dad RIGHTFULLY dosen’t want his son to join a gang as Virgil points out.. he can’t be there for him all the time and eventually one of those times, Francis will be around. And he may not surivive that. Virgil nods noncomittaly.  At home it gets even more grim as he dosen’t open up to his family, understandably as his dad would jsut say to call the police and well.. we’ve seen how the police treat black people. At best they’d just try and use Virgil as an informant and that likely wouldn’t end fucking well for Virgil. Ritchie points out he can’t join a gang, virgil’s mom died that way.. see told you it’d be important to the plot.. but I like how the story dosen’t offer an easy answer.. well okay he gets electric powers soon enough but without the fantastic element this is just an innocent kid caught between either joining the very thing his mom hated or hoping a system not built to protect him will keep him alive. It’s utterly saddening and chilling and holy shit is it amazing a cartoon in the early 2000′s was able to get away with.. ANY OF THIS, and they handle it great, paired down a bit from the comics but even then it’s still incredibly balsy they got THIS much in. 

Naturally Wade calls in his favor and our hero is forced to come running.. and soon finds out Wade’s brought him in for a massive gang war. Welcome to the big bang, baby. He hands Virgil a gun as things get started and Virgil.. drops the thing and tries to escape, in a harrowing sequence.. and runs into Francis because god apparently REALLY hates this kid today. As if to prove that the police show up and while that prevents a beating, they demand they disassemble. then release untested gas on them because of course they do. 

As a result the big bang truly begins, with the various gang members getting mutated.. and naturally so does virgil. Though he wakes up the next day seemingly fine. How’d he get home? Does his dad know where he was?

I don’t know and we’re not getting any answers, but Virgil soon finds weird stuff happening like his clock shorting out, change being attracted to him and his razor going wild. It’s only once he get sback to his room he gets an inkling of what’s going on and calls Ritchie to meet him at the Junk yard.. though it is a bit of a dick move as he dosen’t you know, tell him anything about Wade or Francis right away. He does at the yard though.. and that he has powers, having finally figured out how to use them to a point. And the series does provide a decent justification later as to why he’d get this so quickly: Virgil is a smart kid, gets great grades at school and apparnetly there’s even an episode later where he gets a scholarship to a fancy genius school. So him getting how elctromagntisim works or being a quick study on it makes perfect sense. 

Richie suggest the obvious.. to become a superhero. And the thought.. hadn’t occured to Virgil. It’s honestly a nice twist on the old trope. That he hadn’t thought of it, not because he’s selfish or any of that or needs to learn a hard lesson, those have been done.. simply because the rush of getting his powers, and implicitly of having a way out of his current predciament, a way to keep Francis off his back and keep Wade from pulling him in further. His own path. But once i’ts brought up.. he jumps on it. Part of it is being a nerd like you or I, of course he wants to.. and being a good intetioned one, he knows this is the right thing to do. It’s waht makes a superhero a hero: Anyone can get powers in a universe like this, esepcailly the dcau, but it takes true courage and heart to use them selflessly and knowing you’ll be in danger. It’s why I love surperheroes: they often didn’t ask for this but they do it anyway because somebody’s gotta. We also get an intresting wrinkle is superman is, at least I think in this episode I could’ve missed it or misremembered things, mentioned as a fictional character. That’s because originally like the comics this wasn’t part of the DCAU.. but eventually the crew decided it shared staff from it, shared a network, both first run and on reruns, why not just make it part of the DCAU proper. I fully support this decisionf: While i’m midly annoyed unlimited never really used anything from static shock outside of Static himself in the time travel episode, despite you know Static and Gear having BEEN to the tower and not being much younger than Kara and defintely older than Courtney, I chalk it up to weird rights issues or something like that. But having Batman, Batman Beyond, Superman, Green Lantern and the Justice League itself all guest star was a good idea, and expanded both static’s universe and gave the DCAU something differnt as most heroes in it were older and more experinced in contrast to the up and coming virgil. Again really would’ve been nice if he and gear could’ve been a part of the expanded league but production might of just been too far ahead or, given he had his own series, they might just have wanted to stick to toher characters. Also begs the question why Icon or Hardware wasn’t adapted for the expanded League but hey, questions for later and the tricky logisitics of the milestone rights might’ve been the issue. I don’t know I wasn’t in the room. 

So we get a costume montage, including Black Vulcan from Superfriends, who again ironically would be voiced by Lamarr not too long after this, though weirdly they DON’T use his outfit from the comics for this montage. I mean why not? It fits the gag and would’ve been a good second to last choice.But what could’ve been aside we get our winner and cut back to present day...

Thanks boys. Static finds out one of the things in the warehouse is a shipment of computers for the school and can’t help but show off, showing up to the school, where Frieda and Richie are setting up for the dance, and dropping off the computers, and even saying his catchphrase for the first time “I’ll put a shock to your system” (Which Richie chimes in with awesome line and I agree, great catcphrase), before helping set up and flirting with frieda. 

Though as Richtie says he’s a natural. He’s not wrong as he can work a crowd. .but back it up too as his first run out had him easily taking out the crooks, and as many teen superheros and fans of heroes of hte type, myself included will tell you, getting it right in one is not easy. Not even Miles MOrales was immune. All Static needs now is a villian. 

And the end of the episode provides one as we see, in horrifc and once again damn suprising detail most of hte new metas aren’t doing so good and are melting and other stuff and we catch up with Francis whose burning up.. and naturally given that hair, though given he named himself F-Stop it’s the least of his problems, he’s got fire powers and escapes to “Have me some fun”

So with that we end episode 1. And it’s excellent, a great way to introduce the hero and while the warehouse opening is a bit superflous, it is a decent addition, showing our heroes first outing in costume and giving us a bit of an action scene to get us through the very heavy rest of the episode. But the rest of the episode is no less grippping, telling the tale of a teen caught in an unwinnable scenario who suddenly finds a way out. And speaking of which waht of Wade? Will we see him again? Is he perhaps Ebon, the series big bad as I thought when I was a kid? What comes of the man who directly caused static’s origin?

Yeahhh that’s the one mistep I think the pilot makes. Frieda is understandable as that was likely a simple change in creative direction. This though? Why build this guy up if your not going to bring him back. I mean where he went was probably the grave, as he probably did due to his mutation, but it’s still VERY weird to spend a whole episode focusing on this guy, building him up as a big personal threat to our hero.. and NOT have him become the series big bad. And maybe he WAS supposed to be ebon and they just changed their mind. I don’t know but it bothers me it bothers me a lot. Otherwise though flawless. ONe more to go. 

Aftershock: We open outside an electronics store, as our heroes watch the news reacap what happened in the first episode, with the media dubbing it the Big Bang and revealing their could be hundreds of “Metahumans”, as Virgil dubs after deciding the media’s term “Mutant” dosen’t fit, a nice wink to the fact that that’s the term used in dc comics and I believe milestone but could be wrong there. Me I like the term, has a nice ring to it. 

At the store while Richie mulls over waht this means Static finds out he’s a human CD player.... this was before mp3 players and streaming on your phone made them horribly obsolete mind you and if you don’t know what one is congradualtions you live in some sort of bubble and you made me feel really old junior. 

Frieda happens to be there and Virgil quips “What’s the matter they run out of britney cds”. Dude she’s not bad. Also be careful what you wish for man. Nickeback returned the year after this. You have not truly suffered through bad music yet my young friend. They spot a kid looking feverish, and he soon turns into a purple werewolf, as you do. It’s a bang baby.. those are richie’s exact word and you may not want to start a panic there bud. Just saying your best friend is one. THeir not all like this. Our heroes book it only to run into Francis who naturally refuses to let them leave and only doesn’t try to beat up Virgil because Virgil points otu the werewolf and nonplussed, he goes to fight it, scarring it off by revealing his own powers. He’s now dubbed himself Hotstreak which points for getting an actually good name kid. No points for what happens next as unsuprisingly getting powers did NOT mak ehim a better person and he attacks Virgil who blocks with a garbage can lid and thankfully is blasted into an ally. Richie tries to guard frieda for damn obvious reasons but gets hsi shirt burnt up because shut up Thankfully Static shows up, and we get our firsdt full on superhuman fight as both fight each other with aplomb, and it’s a damn good fight.. and one that goes pear shaped for Virg as he’s caught off guard when he finds out Hotstreak can use his powers to fly, and tackles him and his previous trauma causes him to freeze up. Thankfully , as Frieda put in a call earlier, the fire department arrive and HOt streak has to retreat, though Virgil is bummed that he “Choked”. And I love this as it not only shows Virgil’s inepxerince, as this is his first time fighting a bad guy but that just because he HAS power now dosen’t mean trauma and his previous fear of Hotstreak goes away or you won’t freeze up from time to time. It dosen’t make him weak or anything like some assholes would call it .. it makes him human. Humans make mistakes, and it makes him all the more relatable that he’s not pefect and that he did freeze up as I know I certainly would at last once in the circumstances. 

Things don’t get better at dinner as Sharon and Pops argue over the bang babies with Pops calling them a meance and Sharon pointing out Static exists so they can’t all be bad. See assuming a group of superhumans are bad because a handful of them ar edick sis why the x-men had to get their own island nation. You can only save an ungreatful populous so many times before you say “fuck it i’m getting my own island, pay me for life saving drugs, save your damn selves and stop doing genocides on us. Kay thanks”. But he does bring up a valid point that rattles his son: We don’t know anything about the Bang Babies or their biological structures and it’s likely they might further mutate into monsters, Static included. 

Virgil, understandably, wants to check this and thus he and richie compare blood samples in science, to no real conclusion. She he checks out with his doctor who assumes he’s sexually active in a great getting crap past the radar bit and a bit of realisim, but he agrees to the test though if something came up he would have to tell Virgil’s dsad and is up front about this. Nice dose of realisim.

That night City Council has a meeting and the Mayor TRIES to deflect Papa Hawkins questions about the bang babies which again, while being a judgmental ass as not every person hit was a gang member (Virgil, and as we discover later some others), and not every gang member is there by choice, some by circumstnace some, like virgil almost was, because they HAD no other option. Again years of reading x-men may of just made me a bit touchy on assholes admitely assuming superpower people bad. But it’s clear the public is upset and while she says an investigation is underway... Virgil and Richie are not only not convinced, but figure she’s actively covering it up. And unlike everyone else there who probably suspects the same, they can do something about it and tail her.  It’s during this, and cleverly as I didn’t realie till writing this using similar skills to his human cd player act, Virgil listens in and discovers whose behind it: Edwin Alva, whose apparently richer than bill gates and a beloved phinarophist Alva, as it turns out, was actually the arch enemy of Hardware in the comics, taking advantage of the guy in his civiliian idtentiy and thus casuing him to launch a war on the asshole. He does transition into this series well though, being the one behind the gas that caused it and with the mayor agreeing to back off, planning to simply dump the info about the big bang on a disc then destroy everything for now till the heat dies down. Yup sounds like a corprate douchebag. 

Static tails him, finds the lab and infiltrates it, stealing the disc.. but getting caught by Alva’s goon, and trapped in a glass prison, forced to use ALL his power to escape and barely getting out alive, but not before bouncing off alva’s car. Still he now has the proof.. and meanwhile Hotstreak, who I was wrong did get captured, is forced to take pill sbut spits them out once the orderly is gone. Dude.. WHY DIDN’T YOU WATCH HIM. Make sure he swallows that shit especially since, as he has no powers right now and can’t harm you. 

Hotstreak escapes off screen and our heroes discuss the disc before he shows up, and we get a REALLY fucking amazing scene: Virgil ducks into an Alleway and ritchie is worried.. and Virgil disarms him with just one word responses Ritchie: Virg you can’t take him.  Virgil: Gotta. Ritchie: Well at least wait for the fire department Virgil: Can’t.  It’s simpile but it gets the point across: This is his fight, he can’t wait for help, and people need him. And this is what makes a true hero: It’s easy to be a hero when everythings going well.. but it’s the true ones who stick it out against the odds and fight anyway. And he’s going to.  So we get one hell of a fight, though naturally Hotstreak burns up the disc. And I do like this as it dosen’t feel contrived.. yes Static could’ve left it with ritchie.. but he wasn’t thinking in the moment and dind’t really have time to think abotu the disc, only that people were being hurt and he was all they had between them and Hotstreak. It was no choice at all. Still that pisses Virgil off that the last night’s work is now worthless, and he fully charges up and curbstomps francis who retreats into a clearing. Hostreak brags when static follows, as even he’s figured out Static needs to be around metal, as he’s usually on his disc or the street, and in the park there suppodsidly isn’t any. But he’s not THAT smart as Virgil points out two things: one, he hoped to do this on PURPOSE so they wouldn’t be around people and no on e would get hurt and 2).. this is a city, there’s metal everywhere.. and he awesomely and cleverly proves it by unlodging a sewage pipe with his powers and dousing his foe, winning and proving his stuff. I love this solution, it’s a clever spider-man type way to disarm him, using smarts and the einvroment instead of just brute forcing it. Though the sewage part wasn’t intetional our hero still won and gets praise from the people dumb enough to follow the fight. 

However at home Virgil points out it was  Pyrrhic Victory and shows off his smarts by telling the tale behind it, which I didn’t know,because tv tropes didn’t exist yet: king pyrhus fought the romans and WON.. but had so little armies left that he still lost overall. That’s what this feels like to Virgil: he beat hotstreak but any chance at a cure for Bang Babies and Alva going to jail for causing them is gone. His mood does get a boost though as the doctor calls and reveals he’s fine, he just has a bit too much elctrolytes and just needs to lay off teh salt. He celebrates, we get a quick gag and the episode ends

Aftershock is another stellar episoe, giving us Virgil’s first super foe and a personal one at that, while showing some growth. As richie tells him he’s not virgil anymore he’s static and he can’t let his past get to him.. and he does’nt going from cowering in fear to easily beating his foe with simple logic. It’s a good followup that answers questions you may have from the first ep, like what does this do to virgil’s body, who supplied the gas, and why has no one done anything about this, and sets up another villian for Static in Alva. Great stuff. I highly recommend these episodes and the show as a whole: it’s fast paced, grounded and enjoyable, having just enough levity to not be too dour but just enough tension and stakes to be intresting. A throughly fantastic superhero show and one that i’d certainly love to revisit on this blog If you have an episode of static or the dcau in general you’d want me to cover, my comissions are open and details are on a tab on my blog or can be gotten simply by asking me via ask or dm. Tommorow we’re going deeper underground, there’s too much damage in this town as the Lena Retrospective continues. So expect gay ducks, straight ducks and some terrfirmains. See you next rainbow. 

[nelapanela94]

Hi!

Levi X Fem!Reader

Warnings: Mentions of drugs, abortion, and swearing.

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Y/N and Levi had been dating for a year. At the beginning, they had managed to keep their relationship a secret, but one evening, Hange caught them in the captain’s office making out. Y/N sitting on Levi’s lap and their shirts partially unbuttoned. They let out a deep sigh as Hange excitedly ran across the hallway shouting “You all owe me, it’s time to pay”. And it didn’t take long for the rest of the scouts to learn about the two.

Some people found them adorable; and others, who used to flirt with Y/N and send little presents to her, took their distance afraid that Levi might kill them with a glare. Despite their relationship was not a secret any longer, PDA was kept to a minimum. They would walk with their pinkies intertwined, caress their thighs under the table and stealing kisses when nobody was looking. Nonetheless, behind closed doors they couldn’t stay away from each other. Even when Levi was occupied with paperwork late at night, he would allow Y/N to sit on his lap and rest her head on his shoulder.

Everything seemed lovely and perfect, but lately Y/N had been distant to the black- haired captain. Even though she promised she was fine, he sensed the tint of distress in her eyes and voice.

Doesn’t she love me anymore? Is she getting bored of me?

Sometimes, Levi overthought about his relationship with Y/N and gave in into his unfounded insecurities, wondering about what Y/N saw in him in first place. Y/N was a sunbeam, with a caring and approachable personality, she was popular among the scouts. On top of that, she was born into a merchant’s family from Stohess District. Her parents, naturally, expected her to marry another merch’s son in order to expand the business.

At the other end of the spectrum was Levi. An ill-mannered, unapproachable man from the Underground City, without a family name, and last but not least, a former thug.

“Levi, you’re the only one I want” She always reassured him with a bright smile. Yet he felt he didn’t deserve her. What life could he offered? She was raised surrounded luxurious goods, expensive clothing and jewelry, never worrying about how to earn the next meal. He could not give her the life she was used to.

You’re the only one I want. Nobody else. They’re not like you. They’re not you.

Behind that stoic demeanor laid an insecure boy who was afraid of not being enough. Perhaps, that is why Kenny abandoned him back then.

Moreover, he was deadly terrified of losing Y/N. He had lost important people in his life, his mother, his closest friends, comrades, but the mere thought of losing Y/N drove him crazy.

A knock on the door disseminated his thoughts.

“It’s me Levi” Y/N slowly opened the door and came in.

“I need to tell you something” they said in unison.

“You first” She stood in front of his desk.

“You”

“You, Levi” He sighed and gave up. Arguing with her would not take it anywhere.

“Do you believe... I mean” he gulped. Why does he have to stutter when it came to her? “Do you think this... we... you and I are going somewhere?”

She raised a brow. “Will you take me on vacations?”

Levi inwardly facepalmed.

“I mean, do you see a future with you and I … together?” The last word trailed.

“What’s with that question? Of course, I do, you silly”

“What about your family? I doubt they want a former thug married to their daughter”

“Well, I can’t care less” She shrugged. “If I have to give up my inheritance, I’ll do it without a second thought” She frowned. “You know you’re the one I want” She leaned and pinched his nose.

“I don’t want you to suffer because of me” he stood up from his chair. “I can’t give you the life you deserve. Not now”

“Hold on” She shook the head and frowned. “What concept do you have of me? A spoiled brat who’ll make a tantrum for not getting a new pair of shoes? Or that I’m only with you to spare time before my parents choose the perfect suitor for me?” Tears of anger and disappointment formed in her eyes. “That’s low”

“That’s not what I meant...”

Damn.

“Levi, if you want to break up with me for your stupid, unjustified insecurities, do it then” She rubbed her eyes, and restrained from throwing a punch onto his face. “One more request before I leave. Look me in the eye and tell me you don’t love me”

Levi’s eyes held her gaze. It was intensed, but not a single word came out of his mouth.

“Alright” she sobbed. “I don’t need a coward next to me” She turned around and headed towards the door.

“Oi! Wait! What was it? What you had to tell me” his voice was about to crack.

“It has nothing to do with you now” She replied and closed the door behind her. She sped up to her quarters, covering her mouth with both hands, hence nobody could hear her sobbing.

Levi was left agape, his jaw quivering and his gaze still glued to the door. His eyes were teary and red. He clenched his fists and cursed himself for being a jerk.

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“Hey, go get some rest Y/N” Moblit said with concern.

“I’m almost done, it’s alright”

Y/N was working with Moblit in the lab, transcribing the most recent findings of one of Hange’s investigations. “You have a nice handwriting”

“Thanks” she smiled. “Well, no one here can top your drawings. I guess we make a good team” she chuckled.

“You could’ve taken more days”

“No, it’d been a week and I was already missing the scouts. Besides, my family is quite suffocating”

Y/N had taken a leave due to appendicitis a week after her breakup. Shadis didn’t want her on the field until fully recovered; therefore, she was assigned to office work meanwhile. And about Levi, they avoided each other. He would take the longest path to his office, and she would sit at the furthest table during dinner.

They couldn’t be more immature.

Y/N grumbled when Commander Shadis ordered her to join Levi’s squad to capture a titan for Hange’s research. Of all available cadets, it had to be her. It wasn’t a difficult task; thus, it wouldn’t take long.

Nevertheless, things didn’t go as planned. Y/N had made a single mistake that almost led the operation into a tragedy. But Levi was there and saved her.

She woke up in the infirmary. Her abdomen was wrapped in bandages, and she whined when she sat up, resting her back against the headboard.

Levi came in minutes later, and judging by the expression on his face, he was far from content.

“What the hell was that?” He sternly demanded.

“Don’t be loud” She groaned, covering her ears.

“You almost fuck it up. Not even a rookie would have made such mistake”

“Sorry” she rolled the eyes. “Why did you come back to save me then? If you wanted me out of your life, you could’ve gotten rid of me for good” She nonchalantly shrugged.

“What’s wrong with you, Y/N?" His brows furrowed. "You're not the same since you came back from your leave”

“My boyfriend dumped me, is it a valid reason?”

Levi grunted. “you’re into opioids because you’re heartbroken?” he approached her bed and drew a small container out of his uniform pocket. Y/N’s eyes wide opened, then scowled.

Busted.

“Were you sneaking in my room?” She was cold sweating.

“You were too suspicious lately, Y/N. Sneaking out of the headquarters at night, being lethargic and tired during the day.  And don’t get me started with your irritability. I had to follow you”

“Why?”

“Because I still care about you” he confessed, averting the eyes.

“Well, I don’t need you to take care of me” She crossed the arms over the chest, and bit the inside of her cheek.

He took a seat at the edge of the bed. “I won’t tell anyone about this shit.” He put the container back in the pocket. “I just want to know why” His eyes displayed his concern.

“You’ll despise me if I tell you” She looked away.

“It can’t be that bad”

“Believe me, It can. I...” her eyes became watery. “I made a terrible decision Levi, and I just wanted to forget” Her voice trembled.

“You can trust me” He placed his hand on hers.

“Levi” She began. “You don’t have to forgive me. You can hate me. Kick me off wall Rose without gear if you feel like”

“What is it?” He was growing impatient.

“That day, at your office I... I stopped by because I had big news for you” She gulped. “I was dead scared to drop that bomb, but the matter involved the two of us” Heavy tears rolled down her cheeks. She looked up at his steel gray eyes. “I was... I was expecting, six weeks according to the midwife” His eyes went wide. “The appendicitis wasn’t appendicitis. One of the cadets knew someone in Trost who could help me out” Levi couldn’t hold back his tears anymore. A churn feeling invaded his chest, and the pressure made it hard to breath. “I was so angry and hurt I didn’t think twice” She burst into tears. “I was alone and scared. And I still regret it.”

He moved closer and hugged her tight. She buried her face in the crook of his neck, soaking his shirt with tears.

“I’ve been tormented by what it could’ve been. You and I and...”

“Shhh... don’t say it” He caressed her hair.

“I was too scared, Levi. I didn’t picture myself as a single mother and my parents would’ve turned their back against me. Then, guilt was eating my soul; I needed the fastest way to forget”

She didn’t want to see his face. She knew his heart was screaming out in pain, disappointment and ire.

Levi could not blame Y/N, though.

Maybe if he had let her talk first, if he hadn’t been that coward, the story would have been different. He also felt a hint of guilt within himself.

“In my brain, I knew it wasn’t the right moment. In my heart, however, I started imagining and dreaming about what could’ve been”

“Stop tormenting yourself, it won’t change anything” He whispered. He pulled apart and placed a hand on her cheek. “I can’t forgive you because there’s nothing to forgive. I’m not going to lie, it hurts, but I can’t blame you.”

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“Mine” Levi growled leaning over, resting his forehead on Y/N's.

“Mine” She whispered.

He pulled off of her with a groan. She laid on his bed, drained and exhausted. Levi settled next to her, both panting, staring up at the ceiling.

“I missed you” She managed to say, still recovering her breath. He took her hand, interlacing their fingers, and placed soft kisses on the knuckles.

“I missed you, too”

“I received a letter from my parents. They want to meet you”

“Do they?”

“Yup! And don’t worry, they’ll like you. Besides, my little brother looks up to you”

She rolled on her side and placed a kiss on his cheek.

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Gracias, Arigatou!

[thefeelswhale]

The Nervous Energy in Everything - Part 4

Author’s Note: TW for narcissist parent. 

It was the most magical moment of his entire life so of course Hitoshi’s dad had to barge into it.  

“Why don’t you show Hitoshi your room?” He said to Izuku who jumped guiltily at the reminder that other people were in the room. 

“Oh! Um.” Izuku turned bright red and some of Hitoshi’s instant and embarrassed irritation with his father must have leaked through their connection because he gave Hitoshi a concerned look before tugging him away. It was clear to everyone involved -except his father who didn’t question it when he got his way- that Izuku wasn’t obeying an adult so much as he was getting Hitoshi away from his dad. “Here, it’s this way.”

Izuku’s room was little and would have been plain except for all the All Might posters.

“Wow.” Hitoshi turned a slow circle. They were still touching, but switched to holding hands. To his surprise they were still getting a little bit of transmission, but not to the degree they’d gotten from touching their marks. 

“Ah, haha.” Izuku rubbed the back of his head. “I’m a little bit of a fanboy.”

Hitoshi had a strong recollection just then of when he was twelve and still had his bedroom walls plastered in band pictures. They’d been torn down after he turned thirteen and got into a fight with his dad. Hitoshi didn’t remember what it was about, but he remembered what came after. It was one of the few times his uncles had been forced to intervene. Uncle Shouta had appeared in the doorway with a kind of stillness about him that Hitoshi never wanted to see again, took in the wreckage of the bedroom, and quietly said “I want a word” while maintaining eye contact with Hitoshi’s father.  

Hitoshi never found out what they talked about, but his dad never set foot in his room again. They didn’t even make eye contact for a week afterwards. His dad had offered to replace the posters a couple of times, but Hitoshi hadn’t trusted him not to do it again the next time he got mad so his walls had been bare for the past two years.

“It’s good.” He said, unable to convey his weird gratitude that his soulmate was allowed to like what he liked at home. 

Izuku cupped his own cheek with his free hand and Hitoshi was enveloped in something that felt like a hug from the inside out. 

“Woah.” Hitoshi wobbled on his feet and landed on the bed, hard on his butt. “You’re going to have to show me how to do that.” It felt amazing. “I had to sit out of bond management class in grade school.”

“It’s not hard.” Izuku sat next to him. “I’ll teach you whatever you want.” He promised. “I don’t have a lot of practice though. Ka… my old soulmate. He wore a cover all of the time.” He rubbed his wrist like it was an old aching wound. 

No guesses about where his first mark used to be. The skin was a little paler there when Hitoshi caught a glimpse of it.

His heart sank a little bit at the reminder that he wasn’t Izuku’s first. It didn’t matter, he reminded himself, because he was going to be the only one from here on out and anyway who in their right mind wore covers? Izuku’s old soulmate sounded like an asshole.

Hitoshi had had his soulmark for less than a day and it was amazing. He never wanted it sealed off. If the material of his shirt wasn’t thin enough to transmit bond contact he’d be shirtless at that very moment. Maybe it just went to show that any level of privilege could be taken for granted if you were born to it.

“What happened to him?” Hitoshi asked, but Izuku shook his head.

“Nothing. He’s fine.” There was a rich and terrible vein of unanswered questions in that statement. Hitoshi had no idea where, if anywhere, to start. “We just broke.” Izuku looked down and started to fidget with his hands. “You don’t have to be jealous.” He turned his face away. “I’m the one who gave up.”

Interestingly, Hitoshi realized he could tell when Izuku was telling the truth and when he was lying. That hadn’t exactly been a lie. Izuku didn’t really believe he’d been the one to break his old soulbond, but he didn’t have any better answers either. 

Hitoshi remembered the feeling that had crossed over to him when his soulmark came in; the grief, the disbelief, the… he didn’t really have a word for it. It had been like falling in love, but in reverse. ‘Giving up’ was one way to describe it, but to feel like that and then be able to truthfully say the other person was ‘fine’? He couldn’t believe it had been so simple.

“Hey.” Hitoshi had no idea what he was doing except that he didn’t like the idea that his soulmate’s first instinct was to not touch him. He caught Izuku’s wrist and gently tugged him closer. “C’mere.”

Izuku hugged like he’d heard of the concept or maybe seen it on TV once, but had rarely put it into practice himself. He was reluctant and awkward at first, but sank into Hitoshi’s side with enthusiasm as soon as he’d figured out where his arms went. 

He’d meant to keep the conversation going -to learn everything about his soulmate that he’d missed before they found each other- except he didn’t have a lot of experience with this kind of hugging either. He got plenty of affection from his uncles and his mom whenever she could slip it in past her quirk; turns out it was very different when the person you were hugging was both a cute boy and your soulmate. His brain shut down and it was kind of like being affected by his mom’s quirk, except way nicer and he was aware of everything going on. 

Someone tapped at the door and Izuku sat up to say, “Yes?”

When the door opened Hitoshi was aware just long enough to recognize his mom’s pinched and unhappy expression before everything whited out. 

He came back to himself alone in the room with an unhappy, anxious Izuku.

“You’re back.” Izuku cupped his face and titled Hitoshi’s face this way and that; checking his pupils, Hitoshi realized. When his mom quirked someone their eyes went totally white. 

“I… what happened?” He looked around. “Where did my mom go?”

“She left.” Izuku wet his lips. “I don’t know what happened. She wouldn’t talk to me.”

“No, she wouldn’t.” Hitoshi shook his head to clear it. He felt weird. Usually his mom’s quirk felt like the first few seconds of waking up from an amazing nap. This time it was… not like that. “Her quirk activates whenever she pays attention to someone.”

It was an amazing villain’s quirk if you were inclined that way, but super debilitating if you were an ordinary nice person. There were lingering side effects too if she accidentally used it on someone too many times. Hitoshi was immune to that part. He already loved his mom as much as he could, but strangers got weird obsessions with her. As a result she didn’t get out much and was totally reliant on her husband, who was also immune to her quirk by dint of being her soulmate.

“Oh yeah? Is it eye contact or just any amount of…” Izuku clapped a hand over his mouth. “Not the time.” He muttered and refocused on Hitoshi. “She hugged you really tight. Then she left. Maybe…” He gave the bedroom door an uncomfortable look. “...maybe we should check?”

Hitoshi was starting to get a bad feeling too. His dad had been trying to get rid of him earlier. That wasn’t a good sign, but he’d been too blissed out by meeting his soulmate to pay attention.  His mom couldn’t intervene whenever he started acting up without making it worse. She was stuck as a bystander.

“Yeah.” He grabbed Izuku’s hand. “Just for a minute.”

Only, his parents were gone by the time they went into the living room. A little round lady with Izuku’s features, softened by age and gentleness, looked up from where she was locking the door. 

“Oh, there are my boys.” She went over to pat their cheeks. “What an exciting day! How do you feel about something special for dinner? Do you like pork, Hitoshi-kun? We like katsudon for celebrations here, but I’ve got a full fridge. We can probably make anything you like.”

“Am… am I staying for dinner?” Hitoshi asked with a sinking stomach. He was pretty sure he knew what had just happened.

“Well, your father mentioned how much you’d like living with your soulmate.” She chuckled. Yup. She’d been Persuaded. “I just knew Izuku would love having you around too so I offered to let you live here.”

That… person had hustled him out of the room so there was no one around to stop him from manipulating Izuku’s mother into taking Hitoshi off his hands. His dad’s quirk, Persuasion, was incredibly difficult to protect someone against. The only way to stop him was to know about his quirk in advance. Usually Hitoshi knew to interfere before it was a problem --just, not today.

For whatever reason, Hitoshi’s dad had never liked him and made no bones about the fact that Hitoshi needed to have a new living situation lined up as soon as he turned eighteen. He was jovial most of the time and seemed to be kind of aware that he wasn’t acting right. Sometimes he’d try to make half-hearted overtures or make up for whatever awful thing he’d done or said recently. He wasn’t violent --much. He hadn’t ever hit Hitoshi, but he would break stuff or call him names or misrepresent him to people; making Hitoshi seem stupider or more trouble than he was in reality. 

Hitoshi knew the root of the problem was his mom although he could never blame her for it. She was the one who’d wanted a kid and his dad, for all his other faults, would move heaven and earth to get her anything she asked for. It just turned out that sharing her attention was the one thing he absolutely could not do or fake.

“Ma’am. I’m really sorry.” He gulped, realizing he didn’t know her name yet. “My dad used his quirk on you. It’s called Persuasion. He can talk anybody into agreeing with him or into doing something to make him happy.”

“I… what?” Izuku’s mom blinked slowly; the artificial happy buzz leftover from giving in to Persuasion was fading. Sometimes telling a person about his dad’s quirk right after helped them shake it off. It looked like this was one of those times. “I… I may need to sit down.”

“Mom, over here.” Izuku seemed to know what to do when she wobbled on her feet. “Hitoshi, there’s a little bottle in the end table over there. Could you grab it?”

The bottle contained honest-to-god smelling salts when Hitoshi got it. Izuku accepted it and cracked it open under his mom’s nose. The smell was ghastly, but startled her into clarity. She blinked hard and patted Izuku on the shoulder.

“Thank you, dear.” She patted her cheeks to settled herself. “Did…” She looked at Hitoshi and something in his expression made her pivot from upset to concern. “...honey, are you okay?”

His dad had just ditched him with strangers. That hug from his mom had been goodbye and he wasn’t even awake for it. No, he was not okay. 

“I can call my uncles.” Hitoshi swallowed on a hard, sore lump in his throat. “You don’t have to worry.”

“I’ll let that pass because we don’t know each other that well yet.” She got up and patted his cheeks with both hands. He had to bend over so she could do it, she was that tiny. “I’m going to worry. Ask Izuku. I worry about everything and this is definitely worth worrying about. Call your uncles please. Then we can discuss the situation.”

“It might be a bit before they can come get me.” Hitoshi apologized. “They’d have been here, but they had to work.”

“That’s fine, dear. You can have dinner here and we’ll work everything else out as it comes.” She glanced at her son. “Izuku, don’t forget to make that other call.” 

Izuku’s shoulders turtled up. “I won’t, mom.”

They had to split up to make their phone calls. Izuku seemed no more enthusiastic about makin his than Hitoshi was to call Mic’s station office. 

Ami-san, the agency-side receptionist, picked up on the first ring. “Present Mic agency and radio station!” She chirped. “If this is an immediate emergency then tap the line and I’ll start a trace on your number.”

“It’s Hitoshi.” He usually liked chatting with her, but his heart wasn’t in it right then.

“Oh, hi, honey!” Ami-san cooed. He’d known her since he’d been born and had spent more than one afternoon in a bassinet under her desk as a baby when his uncle’s station/agency had been located in the back of a garage. “What can I do for you? Mic told me the good news! Did you want me to slip him a note?”

“Could you?” He decided to just rip the bandage off. “My dad used his quirk on my soulmate’s mom.”

“You’re joking.” Her good mood evaporated. “He’s on probation! He knows he’s on probation!”

“He talked her into offering to take over custody of me.” 

“Oh, sweetheart.” She got real quiet. “I… I’ll let Mic know. Don’t call Eraserhead until Mic can talk to him first. If she presses charges….” Ami-san let the sentence trail off without finishing it.

Quirk misuse laws operated on the three strike principle. If they reported it, this would be his dad’s third strike within five years. He’d gotten off with petty fines the last two times he’d gotten caught; convincing a cabby driver to pick him up over someone else and talking a panhandler into leaving him alone. Most people didn’t notice Persuasion, but sometimes someone with a really stubborn will or certain mental illnesses could shake it off by themselves and if they did they knew he’d tried to quirk them. If Izuku’s mom pressed charges then his dad was going to jail this time.

Hitoshi didn’t actually care about that much except for the ways it would affect his mom. She couldn’t work. She couldn’t talk to people. She had a small disability stipend and did some work as a freelance writer, but it hardly brought in anything. If his dad went to prison, even for a few months, then she would be the one who suffered most. 

The one thing his dad could be counted on was to not work against his soulmate’s interests. This time he either hadn’t thought far enough ahead or was banking on Hitoshi protecting his own mother over a stranger.

“We’ll make it work.” Hitoshi decided out loud. His uncles were proof she could live with other people. It wasn’t ideal, but they used a whiteboard and messenger apps to talk. 

“I’ll have Mic call you as soon as he’s off the air.” Ami-san promised. 

Hitoshi sat in the little tatami room he’d used to make his call. Someone had turned it into a computer room at some point, but it had a curious empty feel to it; like it belonged to someone who was long gone.

Izuku was finishing up his own call when Hitoshi went looking for him.

“...not yet.” He was saying. “The officers took my statement and samples off me at the second incident. The paramedics didn’t say anything when they sent me home, but Death Arms and Kamui Wood were… um… yelling so it was hard for them to talk. I’ll go if you think I should… yes, sir. Under the Dooku foot bridge. Through the manhole there. No, he had to leave once I came to. He left his autograph.” He paused and gave a dry little laugh. “Yes, sir. It was in two soda bottles. I noticed the one with the eyeballs in it was still moving. That’s why I hit it in the eyes afterwards.”

What.

“Bakugo Katsuki.” Izuku was still talking. “Yes, it probably got into his mouth. That’s how it happened to me; the nose and mouth. I wasn’t… I couldn’t breath. I don’t think he meant for me to live.” He wrapped his free arm around his knees. “He said something like ‘twenty seconds and it’ll all be over.’”

WHAT.

Hitoshi stood frozen in the door. He’d thought what his dad did was the worst thing that could possibly happen to him that day, but as he listened he realize Izuku was describing a villain attack; an attempted murder on himself. 

They had been within inches of never meeting each other in this life.

There were a lot of reasons Hitoshi wanted to be a Pro Hero. His uncles were a huge influence on him, but part of it was to prove to himself that he was nothing like that man. Now there was a whole new third reason.

“Yes, I’ll come in tomorrow after school if that’s okay.” Izuku said to the police officer he was apparently talking to. “Oh, um, the registry matched me up today. Ah, haha. Yes. Thank you. It was really good timing, actually. Okay, thank you. Goodbye.”

He ended the call, tossed his phone onto the bed, and flopped face first onto the mattress. 

Hitoshi suddenly understood why Izuku’s first instinct was to comfort him through their bond before. He had no idea if touching was good or bad right now. It looked like he had a lot to learn about being a soulmate. 

He tapped on the doorframe and Izuku looked up at him. The helpless smile that eased across his face did a lot to sooth Hitoshi’s exposed nerves.

“Hey.” He sat up and smiled, a little tired looking. Now that Hitoshi was looking he noticed a line of road rash up the outside edge of Izuku’s forearm, ending just below his elbow. It looked red, angry, and fresh. “How much did you hear?” 

“Enough to have a small heart attack.” Hitoshi felt like he was getting a green light to go over there so he did. Izuku catted into his touch so that his palm skated over the handprint on Izuku’s cheek. He got a brief window into his soulmate’s state of mind: he was tired for sure and running out of steam, but secretly (guiltily, even) glad to have Hioshi around for even just a little bit longer. “How did I not feel you get attacked?”

“Oh, that was me.” Izuku squirmed guiltily. “You’re supposed to pull away from the bond if you’re in danger and you don’t know where your soulmate is or what they’re doing. What if you were on stairs or handling a knife or something?” 

This was getting complicated.

“I guess I’ve got a lot to learn.” Hitoshi admitted. 

He was kind of angling for another extended hug, but a faint call of ‘supper!’ echoed down the hall. He could smell food too; really good food too. His mom tended to cook really healthy and he liked that, but the smells coming from Izuku’s kitchen were rich, fatty, and indulgent; comfort food on a day when no comfort could possibly be enough. Maybe he needed to move in with them after all…

Uncle Mic called while he was helping clean up. Izuku waved him off with a smile.

“Where are you?” There was wind in the background. “That son of a bitch isn’t answering his phone.”

Oh boy. Present Mic was swearing. This was bad.

He rattled off Inko-san’s address. “I’m okay.” He said. “My soulmate’s mom is mad at dad, but she seems okay with me. She fed us and said I can stay as-as long as I need to.”

“Okay, that’s ---good?” Mic took a breath and Hitoshi could picture him tugging on his hair. “Then I’ve got time to get out of costume. She’s probably not up to having a pro hero showing up on her front step, huh?”

“It’s been a rough day.” Hitoshi agreed and shielded the receiver so his voice wouldn’t carry. “Izuku, um ---my soulmate. He got hit by a street killer today. He’s okay. There was a hero in pursuit, but Inko-san almost fainted earlier. I don’t think it’d be a good idea to push it.”

Present Mic was, objectively, A Lot.

“By a… a what?” Mic snapped. “I thought you were in Aldera?”

“I am, I am.” 

“Hang on.” Mic carried multiple phones and Hitoshi could hear him get out the one he used exclusively for internet. It had a distinct noise when you unlocked the screen. “Aldera… street attacks…” He was quiet for a moment. “...well, alrighty then. This went down while I was on air. No wonder I missed it. Your boy is scrappy. He beat the crap out of some guy trying to kill a middle schooler with his backpack. All Might was responsible for the takedown. Okay, I’m a little less worried. The villain was a purse snatcher who escalated. That’s less terrible than a possible serial killer in the area.”

Hitoshi compared that to what he’d heard. “That sounds about right.” If he was right then that was the second incident. The first incident must have been when All Might caught the guy the first time. “Could you… could you talk to him about it? I don’t think the police really interviewed him.”

Hitoshi only had second hand knowledge of working with the cops, but he’d never heard of one taking a statement over the phone. Plus there was the matter of Mic’s official report only mentioning the second attack. There was a good chance that officer had just pretended to take the report and had really blown Izuku off. It wasn’t entirely negligent. People sometimes tried to insert themselves into big incidents, especially if it showed up on TV or a big name hero was involved.

“Sure can, buddy.” Mic’s tone went concerned. “Are you all right?”

Hitoshi couldn’t find words to describe how he was feeling. It had been easier to have opinions about Izuku’s problems. “It’s nothing I didn’t already know.” He said at last. 

“We’re coming to pick you up.” Mic promised. “If Hiroshi thinks he can kick you out of the house then he’s got another think coming. We’re gonna make this okay.”

“Okay.” Even Hitoshi could tell he didn’t sound convinced.

The doorbell rang about thirty minutes later. Izuku had pulled him over to the TV to watch the nightly Hero Report and got super into it. Hitoshi liked getting his after action breakdowns from spotter blogs and podcasts. Listening to his soulmate talk about the action on TV was like that, but better. Inko-san watched with them -alternating between that and an embroidery project- and seemed to amuse herself by asking her son questions about what was going on even though she clearly knew the answers.

Uncle Shouta stood at the door sans Uncle Mic and he looked pissed.

“Hitoshi.” He stared into the house over the top of Inko-san’s head. “We’re leaving.”

Hitoshi started to look for his shoes, but drew up short when Inko-san san said, “No. I don’t think you are.” 

She sounded like she was just barely keeping her knees from knocking together and when she stared up at Hitoshi’s uncle she looked like a bunny trying to stare down a Balrog. 

“Excuse me?” Uncle Shouta was dressed down for the evening, but spiritually channelling Eraserhead more than he normally would when faced with a middle-aged homemaker. 

“I am not comfortable sending Hitoshi-kun back into that house.” She didn’t back down and Hitoshi’s heart did something complicated and painful. “How does that --man act at home if that’s how he treats a stranger? Hitoshi-kun is my son’s soulmate. That means I have equal rights to him and I don’t want him back under that man’s roof.”

“It’s not his roof.” Uncle Shouta’s tone was a little less obstreperous than before. It might not seem like it, but Hitoshi’s maternal uncle responded best to logic and that was a good counter argument. “It’s my roof and all his shit’s gonna be in the yard as soon as I get home.”

That… answered some questions Hitoshi had been nursing about his family’s living situation. His dad had a good job and made good money, but he deferred to Hitoshi’s uncles in ways that made no sense --unless he was living in their house. 

Inko-san’s chin wobbled, but firmed up. “Then you can have Hitoshi-kun back as soon as he’s gone.” 

Uncle Shouta’s unsettling black gaze slid towards Hitoshi. “You okay with that?”

Hitoshi found the strength to nod. “Don’t kick mom out.” He probably didn’t need to ask. Uncle Shouta had been looking after his sister long before her soulmate or son came into the picture. Like Hitoshi, he wasn’t totally immune to her quirk but he didn’t get the creepy side effects from it. 

“I can’t stop her if she decides to go.” His uncle warned him and that was exactly what Hitoshi was afraid would happen. He looked back to Inko-san. “I’ll be back with an overnight bag for him.”

“Thank you.” Inko-san relaxed slightly. “I don’t know if we have anything comfortable to lend him for the evening.”

“It’ll be taken care of.” Uncle Shouta stepped back into the shadow of the open air corridor outside Inko-san’s door and vanished like Batman. She carefully shut the door when she realized he wasn’t going to say goodbye and was quiet until she got into the kitchen and poured herself a glass of water.

“Your uncle is… an intense person.” She said at last.

“He’s an Underground Hero.” Hitoshi explained and Izuku bopped a fist into his open palm.

“Eraserhead!” He realized out loud. Somehow it wasn’t surprising that Izuku knew about Eraserhead. He didn’t have a big following and was mortally embarrassed by what fandom he did have, but the people who knew about him at all often knew him very well.  

“Is he?” Inko-san relaxed a little further. “Well, then I hope he punches your father right in the nose.” Both her hands flew up to cover her mouth as she realized what she’d said.

“He might.” Hitoshi was a little worried about that. As ever, he didn’t really care if his dad had to deal with negative consequences except for how it affected his mom. 

Mic showed up with a packed overnight bag and his school stuff right about the time Hitoshi was wondering if he was going to have to sleep in his boxers. The upshot was that Inko-san had laid out a double futon in the living room floor without having to be persuaded to let them bunk together. She might have even let them share Izuku’s bed, except there was no hope in hell that they’d both fit on his undersized twin mattress at the same time. 

 Izuku did not recognize Mic, who was harder to spot out of costume because -unlike his husband- he actually put effort into it. He swept in and dazzled Inko-san straight off. Turned out she was weaker to a megawatt smile than to intimidation.

Despite that, Mic looked tired and kind of sore. Hitoshi REALLY hoped it wasn’t actual physical soreness from beating someone up. He still swept Hitoshi up in one of his big bear hugs. “Heya, kiddo.” His voice was a little raspy. “We’re working things out at the house. Shouta’s with your mom. Your dad… well. He’s, uh… he’s checking into a hotel.”

Inko paused as she set down a cup of tea on the coffee table for Mic. “Without Ayame-san?” She asked, confused.

Mic coughed. “Yeah, without Ayame-chan.” He sounded a little down. “She locked herself in the bathroom and wouldn’t come out unless he left. Shouta was still getting the story out of her when I had to leave. I think your dad still has her phone. I’m gonna go get her a new one after this and then you guys can text again.”

His dad keeping his mom’s phone for her wasn’t quite as creepy or controlling as it came off as, but Hitoshi couldn’t deny his dad liked gatekeeping his mom’s access to other people more than he should have. 

Hitoshi’s mom’s quirk was called ‘Siren’ for a reason. She could stun anyone she concentrated on, but the more subtle obsessive secondary effects weren’t universal. Hitoshi, Uncle Shouta, and Uncle Mic were immune because they were all either related to her, super gay, or both.

They’d figured out some loopholes that let her talk to other people. She could text so long as she didn’t hit ‘send’ herself or carry the phone around. Emails were safer, especially if they used a service that routed her outgoing mail through a couple of servers before delivering it. 

“Oh my.” Inko-san sat back on her heels. She glanced at Hitoshi. “I’ll let you two talk.”

“No, I…” Mic took off his glasses and rubbed his eyes. “...sorry, this actually concerns you too.” He glanced at Hitoshi. “I don’t think there’s a good way to bring this up so I’m just gonna do it.”

Well, that wasn’t unnerving at all. 

Izuku leaned into his side. He’d been quiet since Mic showed up, but stayed very close to Hitoshi. His presence was more settling than words could describe.

“Your mom says she wants a divorce.” Mic spoke slowly and carefully “Your Uncle Shouta is prepared to ram it through as soon as he possibly can. Knowing your dad though, he’s going to make it as ugly as possible. Some stuff is going to come up and we didn’t want you to have to know about it, but if I know Hiroshi he’s going to drag it all out into the open.”

That was how his dad operated when he wasn’t getting his way or felt under attack so Hitoshi didn’t necessarily agree. He knew his family situation was weird and most of it could be explained away by the fact that his mom needed a lot of support, but could be exposed to too many people. 

Not all of it.

Hitoshi’s dad made really good money. He could afford to buy whatever services she needed. They didn’t need to live with Hitoshi’s uncles, but they did.

“You’re not worried that he’ll try to get full custody of Hitoshi-kun, are you?” Inko-san asked. “I’ve heard of men doing that sometimes, even if they don’t get along with their children.”

“That’s, uh, not a concern for us.” Mic coughed and rubbed the back of his head. “That’s what I came to talk about really. You see… ah…” He squinted at Hitoshi and tried to smile. “Hiroshi isn’t your father. I am.”

Izuku reached over without a word and clapped a hand over Hitoshi’s sternum, squelching his first furious response before it could even happen. Hitoshi covered his soulmate’s hand with his own, holding it there and making use of the soothing vibrations of their bond for a couple of seconds before he could ask questions that weren’t ‘Are you out of your goddamn mind?’

“It’s not what it sounds like.” Mic hastened to reassure him. “You see, Ayame-chan wanted a baby really badly. Hiroshi turned out to be infertile. I was just a donor. You were born through IVF.”

That was way less bad than what Hitoshi had first assumed, given the way Mic had phrased that. For one awful moment he thought Mic had cheated on Uncle Shouta ---with Hitoshi’s mom no less.

“We thought Hiroshi was okay with it.” Mic went on to explain. “He seemed to look forward to you at first, but things changed when you were born. I think it wasn’t real to him before that or he hadn’t thought about what it would mean to be a father so…” He fought to keep an uncharacteristically grim look off his face and only met with middling success. “...he refused to let his name be listed on your birth certificate. Normally it doesn’t matter, but he made such a stink about it that the hospital agreed to put my name down. I’m your legal male parent and I share custody of you with Ayame-chan. Hiroshi isn’t involved.”

Holy crap.

Did that mean Uncle Shouta was both his uncle and stepdad? How did that even work?

“It’s going to be hard to get the divorce decree.” Izuku piped up. “I heard there’s precedent now for not granting separations to soul mates if one of them has a quirk disability and there’s no evidence of abuse.”

“Oh believe me, little li--guy...” Mic slid his glasses back on. “...my lawyers are used to way higher stakes. They’ll chew him up and pick their teeth with his bones. Shouta’s been after this for a long time too. No one was going to take her soulmate away from her, but if Ayame wants him gone then we’ll run him out of town on a rail.”

[nandalorian]

the gentleness that comes

Sometimes you just get thinking about random things like “what if Jaskier decided to Eternal Sunshine himself to get over the mountain breakup?” and then proceed to ruin not only your life but the lives of everyone else around you. 🙃

Jaskier/Geralt, PG-13

“No mage can do what you’re asking. Not even, I would wager, something as powerful as a djinn, or at least not in any way that would bring you peace,” Tissaia explains with more patience than Jaskier honestly expected. For all the fearsome tales he’s heard of the headmistress of Aretuza, she is either kinder than he deserves, or the stories have done her very, very wrong. Perhaps both. But her eyes are steady, her expression serene. Absolute. “Just as we cannot induce someone to fall in love, nor can we make them fall out of it.” She pauses to offer a sympathetic smile. “I am sorry. For you to have travelled such a long way, I suspect you do not make this request in haste.”

The compassion in Tissaia’s voice is terrible to hear. After all, sometimes kindness can look like cruelty before you’ve gotten enough distance on a thing. Certainly the opposite is true, anyway. Jaskier would know. He lowers his gaze to his hands, of a sudden fascinated by the calluses on his fingertips, the ragged skin around his nails. He has to take several deep, steadying breaths before he answers. 

“No, not in haste,” he manages at last. “I have prayed for it for some twenty-seven years.”

“Any man would be blessed to have captured such a loyal heart.”

Jaskier can’t resist a scoff. “Any man indeed.”

Several long moments pass, and eventually he must accept that Tissaia has said all she can on the matter. He forces himself to smile and climb to his feet, whereupon he sketches a bow fit for a queen. Tissaia doesn’t rise. She barely blinks, a statue rendered in green velvet and black lace.

“Mistress. I thank you for the tea, and your candor,” he tells her, still inclining his head with a hand pressed over his heart. “It’s not often a humble bard may boast an audience with the great Tissaia de Vries. If ever you are in need of musical entertainment, I proudly volunteer my services. I’m in your debt.”

“You are in no one’s debt, Lord Pankratz,” Tissaia answers, serenely as ever. At no point during their conversation did Jaskier tell her his full name, having introduced himself as Jaskier the Bard and no more. His title is useful to fling around in situations that call for it, but not here; Tissaia would see through any attempt at peacocking. “Nor are you merely a humble bard. You are most welcome here, as any friend of Yennefer’s is a friend of Aretuza.”

“Jaskier, if you will. And I’m not quite sure Yennefer would deign to call me a friend, but I’ll take it.” He smiles back and speaks through the tightness in his throat. “It’s been a pleasure.”

He is almost to the door of her study when her voice rings out again.

“Jaskier.”

He turns.

At some point Tissaia stood without making a sound and came around the desk to face him with her hands clasped together. “I cannot fulfill your wish as such. But I may be able to offer an alternative. One that comes at a great cost.”

Jaskier swallows and hopes the thrill of hope--and fear--elicited by her words isn’t completely obvious. “I’m listening.”

+

Her solution is quite simple, really, and so obvious that Jaskier isn’t sure how he didn’t think of it before. 

However, nor is Tissaia’s warning in jest: the cost is great indeed. So great that Jaskier cannot in good conscience be sure it is one he’s capable of paying.

Not monetary, of course, though he came prepared to empty his pockets and offer his soul if necessary. No, the cost is something more significant and precious than any coin or favour. Much more.

“A memory spell is a rather straightforward matter,” Tissaia explains as she and Jaskier walk the halls of Aretuza. Their destination is unclear, but where Tissaia goes, he follows. He’s not stupid enough to do otherwise. “It’s a spell even a novice can be expected to perform adequately, with the proper training, of course. One never knows when war might be averted by something as simple as a king forgetting an accidental slight, or a maid forgetting a conversation they were not meant to overhear.” She shrugs. “Not always the most elegant solution, but effective.”

A shiver crawls down Jaskier’s spine and makes the hair stand up on his arms and the back on his neck.

Magic, especially the kind taught at Aretuza or Ban Ard, is an ethical grey area, and mages have always played hard and fast with the rules, holding themselves above the trivialities and petty concerns of human morality. That’s why they’re mages: feared, awed, and resented in equal measure. 

That Tissaia speaks so casually about altering people’s memories, of mages’ power to decide the course of history according to their own values and interests, is a frightening concept. Most days Jaskier can’t decide what to eat for breakfast. And yet here he is, about to consider letting one of the most powerful mages in history stick her creepy magical fingers in his brain and give it a stir. He should consider getting his sanity checked instead.

Jaskier casts a sidelong look at Tissaia. “But falling in love isn’t like hearing something you shouldn’t, or being offended by a poor choice of words. It’s--”

“Complicated. Yes, quite. And even erasing the briefest of memories does not always go according to plan.”

Without warning, she stops in front of a heavy set of double doors, which she throws open with a flick of her wrist--a useless bit of pageantry, that, but one that distracts from Jaskier’s increasingly pressing urge to flee. Tissaia gestures for him to follow her inside and walks on.

Jaskier doesn’t immediately obey. Drumming his fingers anxiously against his leg, he leans over to peer inside, mind racing ahead to images of a frightening laboratory, potions bubbling away in vials, screaming victims strapped to tables or floating in giant vats. It’s--

Oh. A library.

Huffing to himself, Jaskier adjusts the strap of his lute on his shoulder and hurries to catch up.

The place is massive, far larger than it looks to be from outside, with soaring ceilings and giant stained-glass windows that reach several stories above their heads. Shelves upon shelves line the walls, stretching from floor to ceiling, and dozens more sit in neat rows upon multiple levels, staggered in tiers like a duchess’s birthday cake. They are filled to bursting with books, of course, interspersed with tables and comfortable chairs for mages at study. Jaskier can count at least four fireplaces burning merrily away. Right now he and Tissaia appear to be the only ones here.

With a theatricality he can’t help but admire, Tissaia turns and holds out her arms, encompassing everything and looking very like a queen showing off her kingdom. “What do you see before you?” she asks, voice echoing slightly in the cavernous space.

Jaskier furrows his brow. The question is almost certainly a trick of some kind, so he answers with the first thing to come to mind. “Uh… books?”

“Precisely.” Tissaia lowers her arms. “Tens of thousands of books, each of them containing spells, histories, first- and secondhand accounts of untold lifetimes, many of which have been forgotten but not lost.”

“Memories.”

She nods. “Yes. But memories are not like books. And magic, even in the hands of the most talented user, is not like taking a book down off a shelf. It is not a matter of selecting a few chapters to discard and letting the person continue on their merry way. The mind is a much more delicate and complex thing. If it were to be a story, it would be a very messy story indeed, with no clear narrative or plot, no chapter headings, and not necessarily even a single voice.”

“Sounds like some of my earliest compositions.” 

He titters at his own joke; Tissaia’s expression doesn’t budge. 

Unnerved, Jaskier clears his throat and has to break eye contact, looks around the room instead. After a moment, and with a smidge more gravity, he asks, “Why are you telling me this?”

Once again Tissaia regards him with that patient look from before. “Because you must comprehend that there is a price to what you’re asking, and why I do not suggest this lightly. If you are truly serious in your quest to rid yourself of Geralt of Rivia, and I sense that you are, there is a possible way forward. But to erase this one chapter of your life will require throwing out many more--whole volumes, whole books, shelf after shelf of memories. Possibly the entire library, if things do not go according to plan.” She pauses and steps forward to touch his chin, forcing Jaskier to look at her. “Do you understand what I am telling you?”

He swallows with difficulty, throat catching on the boulder suddenly lodged there. It wouldn’t do to ruin the moment by asking how she knows this is about Geralt, even though Jaskier definitely didn’t tell her and did his best to avoid thinking about him during their initial conversation. But his reputation precedes him, after all, and if not that, he really doesn’t want to know the extent of the mage’s legendary powers of telepathy. He also thinks to bring it up now would be missing the point.

“Are you saying I will forget my whole life?” he asks.

“Unlikely, though not impossible,” says Tissaia like that isn’t an utterly testicle-shrivelling statement. “That is the worst-case scenario. The best is that you will cease to remember everything since you met Geralt. That is, in essence, what you want, is it not?”

“I’ve known Geralt since I was barely eighteen.” Panic suffuses his voice without Jaskier quite meaning it to. “I’m forty-five years old.” 

Eighteen-year-old Jaskier is a mystery to him now. Oh, he vaguely recalls joints that didn’t creak and a back that offered him less trouble each morning upon rising, a cock that would swell at a hard gust of wind and balls that never seemed to empty. That boy could sing all day and dance all night in and out of people’s beds. He was loud, annoying, impetuous, drunk on the sound of his own voice, and full of love. So full of love that he could saunter up to a complete stranger with white hair and yellow eyes and end up following him around for twenty-seven years instead. Well… twenty-four, if you don’t count the last three since they become estranged. Which Jaskier absolutely does not.

His enduring muse and most steadfast friend; his life’s greatest and most unfulfilled passion. 

His most profound heartbreak.

Not much has changed about the last part, but Jaskier likes to think he’s grown wiser with age, less migraine-inducing. He lived enough to discover what pleased him before it was taken away.

Are any of those lessons worth unlearning, for any reason?

“Eighteen isn’t a bad age,” Tissaia remarks, breaking through his thoughts, or perhaps deliberately interrupting. She has been steadily taking in Jaskier’s internal struggle with that calm, measured gaze, though her attention is sharp. “By then most of us have some idea of who we are and what we want. Enough that you could begin again.” 

Jaskier slants her a look. “Mages are immortal, and you’re one of the oldest still living. Please don’t condescend to me that eighteen is anything but as unbearably young as it sounds.”

A small smile. Perversely, it reminds him of Geralt. “When you’ve lived as long as I have, forty-five is unbearably young too.”

Ruefully, unexpectedly, Jaskier barks a laugh and concedes the point with a nod. “Touché.”

They linger in that shared bit of humour for a moment, Tissaia’s smile widening and making her look abruptly more human since they met, and then she cants her head. She gestures, and from seemingly nowhere a book tumbles off some far-off shelf and flies into her hand. With an enigmatic smile, she turns it over to reveal the spine and hands it to Jaskier. The Songs of Jaskier the Bard is tooled on the front in gold, winking in the firelight. 

“You’re more fortunate than most: there’s an account of your life right here. Should you want it, that is.”

“I’m not sure I do anymore.” Jaskier peers at the book from the corner of his eye. It almost hurts to look at it directly, to think of the tales sung about in its pages, the joy, the adventure, but also the love and heartache couched beneath every note, every clever turn of phrase. The next words are a genuine struggle to get out, and he tries with everything he has not to cry. “No, I think that time has quite passed. I want peace. And if not peace, then at least blissful ignorance.”

“Hm.” The sound is neither pitying nor understanding, merely thoughtful. Tissaia regards him critically. “Then you may have it. You’re still a young man. Not a grey hair on you, and I’ve my suspicions you’ll live for a while yet.”

Jaskier narrows his eyes at her. What does that even mean. “What does that mean?”

She chuckles. “It means you have time. And time heals a multitude of wounds. Not perfectly, but… passably.”

“And--what? I can find love again, or some such tosh?”

“If you like.”

He huffs. “I used to think that. I did. Give it time, and eventually I’d meet someone new who would make me forget Geralt ever existed, blah blah blah--yes, I know, the irony of that isn’t lost on me.” Jaskier is quiet for a moment. “But I don’t know if that’s true anymore. It’s been three years. The wound hasn’t healed, only festered. The more I try to open my heart to others, the more it seems to close.”

“It is said people linked by destiny will always find each other.”

“Oh, I know that one. That’s a prison sentence, not a comfort.” 

“I didn’t intend for it to be.”

At last Jaskier forces himself to look down at the book in his hand. It has a pleasant heft in his hand, the weight of a life lived well. For twenty-seven--no, twenty-four years he gazed upon the face of the man he loved and loves still. Sang of him, to him, the way seabirds call to the sea, a song in their blood even when the crash of the surf is too far away to be heard. 

Is that enough? Can it be enough?

Perhaps it will have to be. Or perhaps he can simply wake up tomorrow and not remember or care what the correct answer is. Forget even that he asked the question.

He sets the book down upon a nearby table and pauses only to run his hand down the cover, leather supple beneath his fingertips. In his mind’s eye is Geralt--not spitting mad and vicious on a mountaintop, no, but as Jaskier first saw him, sitting quietly by himself in the corner of a tavern. Trying so very hard to escape everyone’s notice, and yet once he caught Jaskier’s eye, quite impossible to look away from. Impossible not to love.

Jaskier turns back to Tissaia and meets her gaze steadily.

“I understand and accept the risks,” he says, confident in a way he does not feel. That has always been his way. Even, it must be said, at eighteen. It’s enough. It will be enough. “Now tell me what I must do.”

[officialleotolstoy]

Oh Danatole Brainrot We’re Really In It Now, aka Danatole playlist annotations!

I am NOT going apologize for making this. I’m not. But know I am feeling shame.

Nobody - Hozier

“I wouldn’t fall for someone I thought couldn’t misbehave”

This is a bit of a best-case-scenario song, but I really feel like the vibes are encapsulated here. It’s got the energy of “i love you because we sin together and it’s fun” and also “I have a lot of lovers but lowkey.... you’re my fave 😳” which is, as I said, the best I could ever see them getting to.

Bad Decisions - Bastille

“So we’ll make the same mistakes til the morning breaks”

This song is about being idiots together and also knowing it’s not good for you which is the vibe. Also the refusal to have an Actual Relationship in “love me, leave me, rhythm of the evening” pops off. This song GETS that it’s a more casual thing but also weirdly important to them. Oh and “maybe this is where it ends” can be interpreted to be about the elopement plan if you want to stretch it.

Quarter Past Midnight - Bastille

“Good times, bad decisions”

“Let’s go be stupid together in public and also maybe hold hands uwu”

Glory - Bastille

“Passing the drink from hand to hand, we admit we really know nothing at all”

“Let’s go get drunk together in private and also maybe hold hands uwu”

Nocturnal Creatures - Bastille

“We’ve only got ourselves to blame, again and again and again”

The whole deal with this song is like. We’re in love kind of I guess but like only when in certain situations when our guard is down. Does that make sense?? It does in my head. And the idea of it being something stupid that they both keep coming back to despite being aware of it really fits. Disclaimer I’m not trying to suggest these two are Deeply In Love I’m just bad at wording things

Nicotine - Panic! At The Disco

“I taste you on my lips and I can’t get rid of you”

“You’re bad for me but we keep coming back to each other” vibes again. I don’t think Anatole is aware of how bad this actually is, he canonically has no idea he’s being manipulated, but I do think Dolokhov has a much better perspective on it. In my mind, Dolokhov really wishes he did not feel Anything for Anatole but. That is not working out the way he planned it, so a lot of these “why do I keep doing this :/“ songs are more from Dolokhov’s side than Anatole’s.

The Waves - Bastille

“Oh what would your mother say if she could see what we’re doing now?”

Look I added this for the Dolokhov’s mom jokes okay. That was the whole reason. I could very much see Anatole saying this exact thing to him.

Hell and You - Amigo the Devil

“Live with me in this sin forever”

Man the ENERGY of this song. The admittance and focus on them both being terrible people but enjoying being terrible together...yeah that’s them.

4am - Bastille

“You are my familiar”

The idea of just accepting something maybe not so great because it’s familiar which becomes easy which becomes fun...I very much think that’s how their relationship progressed, at least from Dolokhov’s end (You’re probably thinking “wow Wren, this playlist is super skewed toward Dolokhov’s feelings on the matter” and you’re right it’s because I hate Anatole 🥰). It’s definitely too forthcoming about actually enjoying the experience but oh well. Oh, and I stole a line from it for a fic once so it gets a permanent spot.

Bad Romance - Lady Gaga

“You and me could write a bad romance”

It is objectively a bad romance, but the real reason this song is on here is that I always forget it is and it makes me laugh every time

It Will Come Back - Hozier

“Don’t let it in with no intention to keep it”

Man Dolokhov really said ok I will manipulate this kid for a lil bit for money and then seven years later he’s helping him plan some illicit elopement for no personal gain huh. Life is crazy. Basically this song covers the “you were not intending for me to stick around but I’m a fixture of your life now!” thing. I wholeheartedly believe Dolokhov never planned to spend this much time with the Kuragins he just accidentally got attached.

Mamma Mia - ABBA

“You know you won’t be away too long”

It doesnt work super well but it makes me laugh okay!!! The concept of being bad for each other and not really working well but coming back to each other for some reason anyway is there.

No Light, No Light - Florence + The Machine

“No light in your bright blue eyes”

I heard the phrase bright blue eyes and smashed the add to playlist button, that’s it. But the more I listened to it the more I decided it could work post-elopement if you stretch it. “I’d do anything to make you stay” is obviously intended to be a romantic don’t-leave-me thing in the song but you can take it as the preparations scene if you really want. Not to suggest preparations is a romantic don’t-leave-me thing, that is very much not what I mean. “You cant choose what stays and what fades away” We all know Anatole wanted to flounce off with Natasha but in the end he was left eating dinner with Dolokhov 😔✌🏻 Dolokhov stayed and Natasha faded away hmmmm. Yes, purposely misinterpreting media is one of my favorite pastimes, why do you ask?

A Little Party Never Killed Nobody - Fergie

I don’t even have a lyric for this this is straight up just there for the hedonism/partying energy

We Are Young - fun.

“Maybe we could find new ways to fall apart”

This is mostly also just here for the friends/lovers at bars and parties living it up type beat. But the line “I know that I’m not all that you’ve got/I guess that I just thought maybe we could find new ways to fall apart” bit does kinda hit. It’s by no means exclusive but they do kinda have fun yknow? Also the awareness that they are falling apart rather than doing anything worthwhile or loving is pretty fun.

Fine Line - Harry Styles

“You’ve got my devotion, but man I can hate you sometimes”

Obviously Dolokhov would not admit to being devoted to Anatole, and I don’t think I can in good conscience say that he is, but I think he’s definitely more devoted than he wants to be. It’s more about the hate line anyway. I initially just added it because I was like oh it works as a fine line between love and...not love, but honestly some of the lyrics work pretty well. Now that I’m armed with the knowledge that Anatole’s name means sunrise, I can say “you sunshine, you temptress” fits too.

I Dare You - The Regrettes

“I never wanted to get too close to you but now it looks like I’m getting too close to you”

RIGHT OFF THE BAT this one gets it. That lyric is The Vibe. “You’re gonna fall but I’ll catch you” is reminiscent of Dolokhov helping Anatole get out of (and into) messes constantly, although in an ideal world it would be a lot more grudging. And not to harp on about this but “you’re the one that brings the sun” 🔈ANATOLE MEANS SUNRISE🔈

Nine in the Afternoon - Panic! At The Disco

“Your eyes are the size of the moon”

I did warn you guys there would be several songs on here that are only there because they mention eyes, right? I definitely said that somewhere. I am going to use Dolokhov’s bright blue orbs for my nefarious Danatole playlist purposes and there’s nothing you can do about it. “You could cause you can so you do” does encapsulate Anatole’s thought process pretty well though, I think.

The Mighty Fall - Fall Out Boy

“Your crooked love is just a pyramid scheme”

Not Dolokhov constantly using Anatole for money 🙄✋🏻 MLM in more ways than one. But also the idea of falling for someone being a kind of defeat works well. Admit you like him, Dolokhov. I dare you.

Bromance - Chester See & Ryan Higa

“Bromance, nothing really gay about it”

Historians will say they were roommates. I’m sorry this song just makes me laugh and I refuse to remove it.

Sarah Smiles - Panic! At The Disco

“You fooled me once with your eyes now, honey, you fooled me twice with your lies”

Rhyming eyes with lies is peak Dolokhovcore! And the “Sarah doesn’t care, she lives in her world so unaware” is Anatolecore because he’s stupid. The bit about “my destiny lies with her” or whatever is irrelevant ignore that.

Fred Astaire - Jukebox the Ghost

“Those eyes, they get me every time”

The entire rest of this song is someone being blind to the other person’s flaws and initially I was like wow this doesn’t work at all and then I realized it could be stretched to mean Anatole being super oblivious to Dolokhov’s manipulation. But when it comes down to it, it’s about the eye lyric.

I Don’t Know Why I Like You But I Do - The Wombats

The title says it all. Literally that’s the whole explanation.

Daft Pretty Boys - Bad Suns

“I don’t like you, you look so pretty from afar”

If you don’t think Dolokhov calls Anatole a pretty boy (derogatory) you’re so wrong and I cannot help you. That was why I added it but the vibes of “you’re hot but wow your personality is terrible and I hate you” are there so. Enjoy! Oh and the bit about wasting your time works too, I can think of like sixty three better things off the top of my head Dolokhov could be doing than hanging out with Anatole, including but not limited to stapling his own fingers together and arson.

Rich Friends - Portugal. The Man

“I could really really really use a rich rich friend like you”

Do I HAVE to explain this one? I also like “Hey man I’m cool to lean on but I’m not your property” for them, if you stretch it it gets across the way Anatole thinks Dolokhov is His Friend but in reality. He’s using him HDHHSHDHDHBS Also the chorus has hedonism vibes, which ALWAYS works with these two.

[trustsalvatorewriting]

queendom || hope mikaelson - chapter eight

Summary: In which a tribrid falls in love with a human girl

Word Count: 2,411

Preface | Chapter One | Chapter Two | Chapter Three | Chapter Four | Chapter Five | Chapter Six | Chapter Seven | Chapter Eight

-

"SHE'S GONE." HOPE PACED across the room, her heart racing as she imagined what possible circumstances she had just put Angel in. She'd tried to fight against the monster, but regardless of what she did, it seemed as though nothing she did affected him. He was immune to every spell. Everything she did only served to exhaust her and stall him.

Unfortunately, Aunt Rebekah hadn't managed to compel Angel to stop acting calm. She'd simply stood there, quiet and accepting of what was happening in front of her. As if she'd known that the creature wasn't going to harm her. Hope had continued fighting after Rebekah had 'died,' but it was no use. He had managed to throw her across the room while she was doing a spell. By the time she had come to, Angel was gone, and the monster had gone with her.

There was a time when death was an unfamiliar concept to Originals. Hope's father, Klaus, had always gone out of his way to make it known that the Mikaelsons were immortal -- ironic, really. Simple death like the snapping of a neck or drowning, something that would usually kill an ordinary human being, would be an untimely nap for an Original vampire. As would a stake in the heart, or a beheading -- things that would ordinarily kill a regular vampire.

To be an Original was to be immortal. Though it seemed that even immortal beings can find a way to die eventually.

It had been about two or three hours since Aunt Rebekah's 'death.' She would be awake soon enough, and they would be able to search for Angel. Unfortunately, that would mean heading straight toward Statera, and the lack of supernatural beings in the town seemed to suggest some sort of magical border.

Or magical blockade of Unsullied Soldiers that would kill whatever supernatural being tried to enter the territory; but what was the difference?

A light began to glow from inside Rebekah's pocket. Hope sighed, reaching over and pulling the phone out of her pocket. She raised her eyebrows at the 'Salvatore School' contact name. How often did they reach out to Rebekah regarding Hope's grades or absences? Honestly, she was surprised that she had any emergency contacts left. Lately it seemed as though Dr. Saltzman was all she had in terms of an adult figure, though Josie and Lizzie were making that relationship particularly hard.

"Don't answer my phone," Rebekah choked out, weakly gasping for air. She held her hand out. "Give it to me. I don't trust you using a phone to speak to anyone except your Aunt Freya from now on."

Hope sighed, begrudgingly handing the phone back. "You just came back from the dead. Do you really think you're in the mood to be speaking to Dr. Saltzman right now?"

"Trust me, darling, we go way back." Rebekah slid the call button, holding the phone up to her ear. "Rebekah Mikaelson speaking... Yes, I have Hope with me right now... What's happening with that map?"

It was easy to forget that her own aunt had been a student of Dr. Saltzman's at one point. Hope sighed, reaching into her pocket for her own phone. Admittedly, she wasn't supposed to have one, but Uncle Kol had always enjoyed bending the rules.

"Yes, I understand," Rebekah responded. "We'll be there as soon as we can."

As Rebekah went to hang up the phone, Hope looked up. "I have to go back to the school, don't I?"

"Well, grand theft auto isn't as bad as turning a werewolf into a hybrid -- so yes, you'll be going back to your regularly scheduled classes," Rebekah responded. She reached for her purse before noticing the disappointed look on Hope's face. "What's wrong? When you were younger, all you wished for was to go to a school for supernaturals. Your father didn't donate three million dollars to the school out of the goodness of his heart."

Hope simply shrugged in response. "All I 'wished for,' was to have friends that knew what I was going through; but no one does. I thought I wanted to be surrounded by supernaturals because it would be where I fit in the most; but ever since Mom died, it's like I would give anything to be human for a day."

"Being a human doesn't protect you from death, love," Rebekah whispered, running a hand through Hope's auburn waves. Only a few shades darker than that of Rebekah's late mother, Esther. The Original Witch -- before she'd tried to slaughter half her family.

"My mom died because she was a hybrid. My father and my uncle died because they had to get rid of a supernatural being called the Hollow that had been preying on me since I was seven years old. Those aren't issues that normal humans go through, Aunt Rebekah." Hope swallowed back tears, stinging at the burning sensation of doing so. She pushed herself off the bed to avoid crying for what seemed like the hundredth time that night. "Let's go."

The ride back to Salvatore School was relatively silent if you didn't count the blaring Frank Sinatra music. Rebekah always said she never enjoyed modern day radio; likely due to the ninety year nap Hope's father had forced her into in the 1920's.

Hope bit her lip, scrolling through Instagram and waiting for a post from Angel's account. Any sign that she was alive and not eaten by the rabid beast that was all she could hope for at the moment -- she would even be glad if she found out that Angel had blocked her. A sign that Hope hadn't been the cause of another person's death.

'Due to her often disastrous past, she has resigned herself to isolation, considering it the path that will provide the least heartbreak in her life. She sees loneliness as less of a burden... than her formative experiences of loving so deeply and losing so terribly.'

A direct quote from her psychological assessments from earlier this year. Dr. Saltzman had the students do one at the beginning of every school year. This was the first time she'd managed to prove the files wrong.

"Is this the part where I apologize?" Hope raised her eyebrows, eyes flitting over to see her aunt's reaction.

"Hope, I was friends with your mother. She knew what it meant to apologize when she knew she was wrong," Rebekah responded, not taking her eyes off the road. "I would hope you didn't learn how to apologize from your father."

"How could I?" She muttered in response, despite knowing very well that Rebekah had supernatural hearing. "He died when I was fourteen and he only spoke to me for two years of my life."

"Your father never learned what it meant to love someone unconditionally." Rebekah seemed to spit the words out as if they were poison. For a brief moment, Rebekah's eyes become glassy, the street lights highlighting her tears.

Hope dropped the conversation before it became it became more intense. Unlike the rest of her family members, Rebekah had always been the person who defended Klaus in Hope's presence. Kol and Davina had never held back when it came to insulting him -- and though Hope couldn't blame them, that didn't mean she was happy about it.

As the gates of the Salvatore School began to open, Hope braced herself for the the endless judgement that came with what she had done. Even stepping inside of the school made her feel as though she were trespassing, entering somewhere she never felt like she belonged.

The Salvatore School: a school for witches, werewolves, and vampires, yet couldn't fit in a tribrid. On paper, it would've made sense.

The two girls were immediately greeted with Dr. Saltzman, his daughters, Raphael, and Kaleb. The diversity in greetings was almost comedic. Dr. Saltzman looked largely disappointed, and slightly shocked by Rebekah's presence. Clearly whatever past they had was complicated, to say the least.

As if reading Hope's mind, Dr. Saltzman stated, "You tried to kill me."

"Your friends killed my brothers and your attempts on Nik and Elijah's life were innumerable. I'm here for Hope's protection, not yours." Rebekah spat, almost disgusted by Dr. Saltzman's reaction. "I will apologize for nothing."

Josie stepped forward, shocked. "You tried to kill my dad?"

"Succeeded, really," Rebekah shrugged. An amused look comes to her face as Josie steps in front of her father protectively. "Love, please. All of my brothers are dead -- rest in peace -- and I am a step closer to becoming human. What would I gain from murdering this poor old man?"

"You're Rebekah Mikaelson," Kaleb stepped forward in awe. "I've read about you in the books -- you and your brother. You guys are, like, the founding fathers of vampirism. Why would you want to become human?"

A sad look crosses Rebekah's face, though it disappears as quickly as it comes. Before she can respond to Kaleb's school boy crush, Lizzie scoffs. "Really? So we're just gonna let Hope off the hook after she literally almost exposed an entire school forsupernatural? All because she brought her stupid aunt."

Hope's eyes began to glow gold, signaling her werewolf gene to step forward. She flashed them at Lizzie as she took a step forward. "Don't say that about my family."

"Guys, we have bigger issues to deal with right now," Raphael pointed out. He walked back the map, pointing toward the town Angel and Hope had met at. "I was watching the map earlier. Trying to figure out what was going on, and what those spots were. I saw a really bright light" -- he glanced up at Hope. The stronger the supernatural abilities, the brighter the light -- " leave Mystic Falls and head to this town. A couple hours later, I saw one of the darkened areas leave the border of Statera and followed you, Hope."

"It wasn't following me. It was following Angel," Hope explained.

"Yes, Kol, I was sure to check that she was human," Rebekah said into her phone. After a moment, she sighed, setting the phone on the table and turning the camera on. A group video chat appeared and Rebekah turned the camera to face Hope. "Say hello to your niece."

She turned her head to see the faces of her Aunt Davina, Aunt Freya and Uncle Kol. Hope's last living family members. She raised her eyebrows to greet them, putting on a tight smile. "Hi, everyone."

"There's our little troublemaker," Kol greeted. "Now, tell me, how exactly did you meet this girl? And why a human? There's always so dramatic."

"Don't mind him, Kol's just saying that because he eats every human he comes into contact with," Rebekah muttered. She turned to Hope for a brief moment. "It's one of the reasons Davina's died so many times."

"That was a fault of a hex, not I," He argued. "And if we're keeping track of dead body counts, exactly how many men did our befallen Niklaus kill on your behalf?"

Hope flinched at the mention of her father. "Her name was Angel. I met her through Instagram, I used the location tags."

Part of Hope felt guilty that Aunt Davina even had to hear this story. She had told Hope stories about a boy named Tim, who she'd met when she was around fifteen; a boy who Hope's father had killed because she had had the nerve to stand up to him. Davina had once told Hope that she regretted ever reaching out to Tim again -- how if she had just avoided going to one of his concerts in the French Quarter, he might've survived.

Yes, Hope had heard all of the horror stories that came with falling in love with a human; for a brief moment, she didn't care. All she wanted was to feel normal for once. To have someone that didn't look at her like a freak. The tribrid; the daughter of Klaus Mikaelson; granddaughter of the Original witch; the girl who was destined to never fit in, no matter how hard she tried.

"Would it be fair to consider her human?" Freya questioned, "If she's being protected by this creature, she may descend from witches."

"If there were supernaturals living in Statera, the map would've shown us," Hope responded. She bit her lip, staring down at the map and tracing the dark border that had grown, surrounding Statera and making it that of a fortress.

Lizzie shrugged. "Or you could've messed up the spell."

"This spell has worked every other time we've needed to track down a new recruit. Why would it be an issue now?" Hope sighed, covering her face. "Look, do you guys remember the Vietnamese legend about the Unsullied? The supernatural guards who were supposed to protect their people during the Dark Ages? It said that they disappeared, but their owners left on boats, right? Maybe they came here."

"But why Virginia?" Davina questioned. "If they wanted to protect their families from armies and supernatural species, why choose a town an hour away from the birthplace of the Original vampires? Why choose a place so close to the water that it could be attacked without a moments hesitation?"

"The logistics don't matter right now," Josie pointed out. "What matters is that we need to go to Statera and see what's going on."

"What? And risk your lives?" Rebekah raised her eyebrows. "No. My niece is not going to fight one of those beasts again."

"We kind of don't have a choice," Hope hissed. "I need to know she's still alive."

Kol cut in, his voice cold and harsh. "Hope. Your survivor's guilt is not an excuse for putting yourself in harm's way."

"Didn't we kill you?" Dr. Saltzman murmured before shaking his head. "Hope's right. Statera is an hour away from Salvatore School. We need to make sure we know what's going on there, and whether or not those monsters are a threat to us."

Lizzie scoffed. "Yeah, let's all listen to Hope. The reason we're in this position in the first place."

Hope grabbed the phone and hung up before her family members could retaliate. Rebekah bared her fangs at the blonde witch, as if daring her to keep going. Hope reached into her pocket, grabbing Dr. Saltzman's car keys, throwing them in his direction.

"Enough with the family drama. Let's go."

[halothenthehorns]

THE SECOND TASK

Before Lily could take the book, she decided to pass the child along to his father. She'd seen some of the often pained looks he'd been getting lately and understood more than anyone what he'd be feeling, and James wasn't going to argue as he eagerly cradled his care.

Lily may have taken the book with a friendly enough smile, but she was not fool enough not to realize that second task was fast approaching, and she did not want the honors of enduring whatever that was. Still, it was her or somebody else she'd have to be listening to, and at least this way she could more easily cut the boys off when she felt like it.

Hermione was scolding Harry that he'd told he'd figured out his egg long ago.

"He said he was very close," Sirius corrected and defended Harry at once.

"And she can't really think he would have figured it out and not told them," James agreed.

Harry told her to keep her voice down, and he hadn't really been lying, he just needed some time to hammer out the details.

"You mean figure out the whole second part of it," Remus muttered.

    The three friends were currently having this discussion in their Charms class, and with all the commotion of the rest of the class it was a good place to have this conversation. Today they were working on the opposite of the Summoning Charm, the Banishing Charm, and the object was to try and target pillows into a box on Flitwick's desk, the idea in this being if the pillows hit anyone at least it wouldn't hurt.

"Clearly Professor Flitwick has never had a pillow fight with Padfoot," Remus absently rubbed his throat in remembrance as he explained, "he goes for the jugular no matter what weapon's in his hand."

"You deserved it for trying to smother me with yours," Sirius said back instantly.

"What even caused that fight?" James asked, trying to spin his mind back to before feathers had flown.

"Sirius wouldn't go to sleep, nothing too unusual," Remus shrugged.

"Oh I remember," Sirius snapped his fingers, "I was trying to figure out why your name is plural. Why is it James, more than one Jame? What happened to the other?"

"Okay, I need another pillow," Remus grumbled, but trying to force past all of Lily and Harry's combined giggling, Lily managed to keep herself going.

Which was all good in theory, but then there were those like Neville with such horrid aim he was more likely to hit other objects than said pillows, like the Professor.

Breaking up the boys argument as well so that now everyone was trying to laugh and listen at the same time.

Harry told Hermione to drop the egg for a moment, he was trying to explain about the rest of his night.

"A much more important topic I'd like resolved," James instantly agreed, honestly wishing the teachers were the most interesting thing to think about this year rather than his son being in that tournament.

Ron was stunned that Moody had searched Snape's office, not paying a bit of attention to his own spellwork and banishing Parvati's hat off her head.

"Ron clearly has the useful aspects of this spell down," Sirius snickered.

Asking if Moody was here to watch Snape as well as Karkaroff?

"If so, he's doing a terrible job," Lily rolled her eyes, still smarting over his treatment of Hermione and Neville as much as Harry.

Harry admitted he didn't know if Dumbledore was telling Moody to do so,

"If so, then Dumbledore just got a lot more interesting," Remus arched a brow, thinking Dumbledore should trust his staff enough he should never have done this, but then again Dumbledore had also hired a Death Eater, so that man was as unpredictable as it could get.

but Moody was doing it anyways. Harry was paying no more attention to where his pillow was headed, so it instead did a belly flop off the desk.

More giggles for that lovely mental image.

Harry continued by repeating that Snape was apparently here on a second chance.

Ron asked if it was possible it had been Snape putting Harry's name in the Goblet?

They were all in such a good mood, nobody wanted to sit and dwell on how that could honestly be a very real possibility. They certainly hated him enough to believe he'd done it, but they had no more proof it was him than anyone else, so no one tried to say otherwise.

Harry most of all felt deep inside him that this answer wasn't even close...but something in that sentence felt like it should be...

Hermione told him off for that, reminding of the last time Ron had tried to blame their woes on Snape, and he'd in fact been saving Harry's life.

James' nose crinkled in agitation at the reminder, he'd called himself even with Snape in gratitude for that, but he'd done nothing since then but treat his son, well like he'd treated him so he was far from liking the guy, and that was before what he'd done to Remus and tried to do to Sirius.

Even while chatting, Hermione perfectly aimed her cushion into the box they were supposed to be aiming for.

"Oh, you were actually supposed to be aiming for something?" Remus asked with a strained smile, looking for something to laugh about again. "I'd never have guessed the way you and Ron were casting around."

Harry stuck his tongue out at him.

Harry considered what Hermione said, but couldn't quite rule him out as a suspect as the man had never likened himself to Harry in any way shape or form by never missing an opportunity to have Harry suspended.

"Suspended," Sirius scoffed, "is too kind, he'd have you expelled the second he could get away with it."

"No matter how many times I see it, I still can't believe he's so petty he treats Harry like James," Remus snapped in agreement.

Hermione said she didn't care what Moody did, Dumbledore wasn't a fool. He trusted Hagrid and Lupin, when no one else would, so he must have a reason for Snape as well.

"I don't think those comparisons should count," James grumbled, drawing his wand and creating a few colorful puffs of smoke to amuse his kid, at least someone in here deserved to be having fun since the mere mention of Snape had ruined theirs. "Moony and Hagrid aren't gits who treat children like his personal voodoo dolls."

Lily sighed, still wishing more than anything that wasn't true, but knowing it was didn't make it hurt less. She wished she could disagree, that Snape being a Death Eater really was his only fault, but after everything he'd done, she honestly agreed with the boys he was past redemption taking whatever his problem was out on those kids.

Trying to say even if Snape was a bit-

Ron cut her off by stating he was pure evil. What other reason did all of these Dark wizard catchers have to be snooping around him?

"And yet not one of them could find anything," Sirius sighed in disappointment. "What is the matter with our justice system they could get rid of me, but not him!"

James would have reached around and smacked Sirius senseless for that joke he still hated if he hadn't been holding baby Harry. Remus also temporarily considered cursing Sirius, but chose to ignore him rather than acknowledge that.

Hermione moved on to ask about why Crouch would be acting ill? It was all very odd of him to be doing that while having missed the Yule Ball.

"One of our main main problems right now, yes," Lily agreed.

Ron told her she was being to uptight about Crouch because of how he treated Winky while one of his pillows hit a window.

Hermione snapped back Ron just wanted to blame everything on Snape, while sending another pillow into the box.

"Got to be impressed with Hermione's skill of multitasking at least," Sirius put a winning smile in place to stop his two friends glaring at him. "She's arguing and still managing to keep at her work."

Harry belayed both of them by asking the real question, why was Snape on his second chance? What had happened to his first one? He'd waved his wand carelessly while speaking, but to his surprise his cushion had landed where it was supposed to.

"Apparently Harry can to," James laughed in surprise.

Adhering to Sirius' wish of hearing about anything odd at Hogwarts,

"Oh yeah, I think this qualifies," Remus gave an odd smile, thinking, 'he can't do anything worse than come back, right?'

Harry sent him a letter telling of his midnight experience.

"Can't wait to hear that response," James muttered without enthusiasm, silently agreeing with Remus, Sirius could do something equally as stupid like try dogging Crouch next to see what he was up to, he wouldn't put it past him.

Harry then turned his attention to his real problem of breathing underwater for an hour.

"The only thing I can think of," Lily sighed, "is a potion to turn you semi aquatic, but that's so advanced for you dear."

"Same with Transfiguration," James scowled, his mind trying to go back to something lower level that could help Harry out, but he was drawing a blank.

Harry had previously mentioned aqua-lungs to Ron, and he offered up the idea of Harry summoning one of those to him.

Sirius turned to explain the concept to James while Remus adamantly shook his head and said quickly, "no offense, but I hope you don't follow that advice. Mostly because you are so far away from anything Muggle, I don't think even Dumbledore could summon something from so far away."

James looked disappointed, now that he knew what these things were they sounded really cool, he'd have liked to hear about Harry using one.

Hermione pointed out all the flaws of this, like Harry would have to learn to use one in under an hour,

"You mean you can't just slip it on?" Harry asked in surprise.

"You might try and let the teachers let you go to the nearest Muggle place so you can buy one," Sirius offered. "Then you'd have time to practice."

"Much less fun than stealing it and making it up on the fly," James pouted even if he did agree.

plus the act of Summoning it would most likely draw Muggle notice flying from where ever it was.

"A fairly good point," Lily chuckled.

Hermione offered Harry should try and Transfigure himself into a submarine or something,

"Machines are harder to pull off then animals," James shook his head in disagreement.

but that might be beyond Harry as they didn't start human transformations until sixth year.

Harry agreed he didn't fancy trying, he'd likely end up with a periscope sticking out of his head forever.

"Such a missed opportunity," Sirius smirked.

Harry suggested he should piss off Moody, he'd turn him into something

All four of them started laughing raucously, Harry's continued fear of being Transfigured because of that instant still hadn't worn off in hilarity.

but Hermione corrected she doubted Moody would let him choose his Transfiguration in a very serious voice.

Sirius was still to busy getting his breath back to make his favorite joke, in fact his laughter had doubled that Hermione had thought Harry meant that as more than a joke.

She insisted Harry should try a Charm to work this problem out,

Lily huffed and pouted she couldn't think of one to help with this.

so Harry resigned himself to another seemingly endless bout of page flipping in the library.

"Most students reach that conclusion by their first year," Remus agreed, "and you seem to double the amount of time you spend in there above them."

Harry tried everything revolving the text, even going to ask McGonagall if he could peruse the restricted section, even asking the librarian Pince for advice, but still found nothing that would help him to live underwater for even an hour.

"This is not encouraging," James started to frown, getting a little twitchy at his own blank mind. This felt like a real laps in his magical education that above some high level magic, some kid could have fallen in the lake in all these years and could have drowned because Hogwarts had never taught them to survive the instance. True when this had happened the giant squid was prone to save people, but that wasn't the point right now.

"I'm sure there must be something," Sirius groaned as he ran his hand through his hair, "I know I've heard of people visiting mermaid villages before, so it is doable."

Harry could feel that old feeling of panic seizing him again, now watching the lake on the grounds in a whole new light. He'd always looked to it as a bit of scenery, never before really seeing the stone gray surface like a deep void.

Remus started fidgeting with the sleeve of his robes, his eyes squinting at nothing, but it really was frustrating them they were drawing a blank on this matter as much as Harry. Not to mention they already had some unpleasant memories about that stupid lake nearly having been the sight Sirius had been Kissed, so they weren't keen on Harry having to be back near it.

Time started jumping in intervals again, weeks turning into days and Harry growing more and more desperate to find something, anything!

Lily's voice was starting to get pitchy in concern, she really had no clue what was going to happen to her baby if he couldn't go through with this task. The magical binding contracts of the Tournament forcing Harry to participate in these contests were the reason he couldn't voluntarily leave, but what would it do if Harry just wasn't able to complete a task? Would his magical core be damaged just because of some stupid event like this?!

With two days left Harry started to go off food again.

After James accidentally released a foul smelling gas from his wand that was mustard yellow, he quickly tucked it away and decided enough of that game, and instead starting bouncing his toddler around on his knee, managing to keep him happy and thump out his nerves all at once.

The only bright spot he had left before the 24th was Sirius' returning owl, which was one sentence: to tell when his next Hogsmeade weekend was.

"Because that was encouraging," Lily snapped at him, having to fight down the impulse to strangle Sirius when he technically hadn't done anything wrong, but they were all so stressed that Sirius being unhelpful felt like an extra kick in the rear.

Sirius raised his hands up in surrender at once, just as annoyed at his own self no matter how muddled that made his mind.

"Why do you even want to know?" James demanded of him. "You're not actually stupid enough to come onto the school grounds again."

When Sirius didn't answer, that only managed to make them all squirm to another degree. They knew he could get away with it, if anyone could survive on the grounds of Hogwarts it was a Marauder, but they'd still felt a lot safer with Sirius being far away from where Snape and an Auror, even a retired one, were.

Harry even flipped the paper over to find the rest of the message.

Remus had to plug his nose to stop himself snorting with laughter, but the indignant look on Harry's face really would have been priceless under any other circumstances, as that really was possibly the shortest note Sirius have ever sent anyone.

Hermione whispered the answer to him which Harry quickly wrote down and sent back.

"That would be so helpful if I lived that long," Harry said with a forced smile in place, at least giving them all the reminder that he had.

Harry felt his anxiety somehow ramp up all the more as the owl took off again. He'd somehow thought Sirius would come back with an answer as well, but in his haste to write down the Crouch/Snape/ and Moody stuff he hadn't even mentioned his egg.

"Not like I'd be much help anyways, clearly," Sirius grumbled, starting to feel an ache in his chest that he'd been so useless lately. He hadn't been able to help Harry with any of these tasks, and had in fact been causing Harry more sleepless nights than anything remotely helpful.

Ron asked why he'd even want to know, and Harry responded back lifelessly, trying to cling to that flare of hope he'd had at Sirius' note.

Sirius forced himself to perk back up at that though, at least he was helping in some way by keeping Harry's moral up even for a second.

James recognized the same thing, and responded by making faces at his baby.

They were due at a Care of Magical Creatures lesson, where Hagrid had thankfully stopped forcing interaction with the Blast-Ended Skrewts.

"Well this is a pleasant start," Remus managed a smile, very thankful if Hagrid had moved on from those illegal things.

Maybe because there were only two left,

"More good news," Lily chirped.

or because he was trying to prove he could do anything that Professor Grubbly-Plank could,

"I already knew he could," Sirius scoffed.

Hagrid had instead been continuing on unicorn lessons.

"Can't deny I'm relieved to hear that," James beamed.

"No offense to Hagrid, but I do hope he does follow this more common line of thinking," Remus agreed, thinking that whole ordeal with the skrewts would be worth it if it had finally made Hagrid realize the things he should and shouldn't be showing classes.

It turned out that Hagrid knew quite as much about unicorns as he did about monsters,

"Well I already knew that," Sirius smiled, "he just doesn't show it as much."

"Could have fooled me," Lily shook her head affectionately.

though it was clear that he found their lack of poisonous fangs disappointing.

"Oh boy, poisonous fanged unicorns," Remus shook his head at the thought, "please don't tell Hagrid about that, or he might start up more crossbreeding."

Today he had managed to capture two foals.

"Ha!" Sirius barked in triumph. "Let's see that Grubbly woman get away with that."

Lily was smiling privately to herself behind the book, thinking those boys had taken that woman way to personally, but as loyal as the Marauders were, she wouldn't be surprised if they resented any teacher taking over a position of someone they liked. It certainly explained the lackluster way they were treating any mention of Moody.

Unlike full-grown unicorns, they were pure gold.

Harry's eyes flipped wide in surprise as he remembered those beauties.

Parvati and Lavender went into transports of delight at the sight of them,

James couldn't stop his own triumphant giggles at Hagrid not only one upping Grubbly-Plank, but also managing to stun those two uppity girls.

and even Pansy had to work hard to conceal how much she liked them.

"Glad to hear she's not a completely heartless monster," Remus smiled, as he'd never met a person who resisted those babies charm.

Hagrid was going over their growth ages, noting how much easier they were to spot at this age and didn't start to change silver until two, nor grow horns until four. They didn't go pure white until seven.

"How long do they live?" Harry asked in surprise.

"Average age is twenty," Remus happily supplied, "some up to thirty. Those that are domesticated and in captivity can live up to forty or fifty."

Harry couldn't imagine anyone actually owning a unicorn, let alone riding one, but he'd certainly love to see that.

The babies were more trusting than their older counterparts, so the boys were welcomed to come forward and pet them, Hagrid encouraging them all to offer sugar lumps.

"They'll never let you leave if you do that," Remus chuckled.

Hagrid called Harry over to him, while the others swarmed the babies,

"Not all at once," Lily couldn't help but caution, "still only a few at a time, don't want to startle them."

"Yes Mum," Sirius picked at her, which she ignored.

and asked how he was doing?

Harry agreed he was fine, and at Hagrid's prompting, a bit nervous. Hagrid clapped Harry on the shoulder, saying he wasn't surprised one bit, he'd be fine!

Even though he knew Hagrid to be wrong, Harry still couldn't help a warm rush of reassurance that Hagrid had such unwavering confidence in him. Harry knew right then he'd come out of this task on top just for that alone.

Asking if he had his clue all figured out?

"For the most part," Sirius rolled his eyes.

Harry hesitated answering at first, wondering if he should ask Hagrid for advice. Had he ever gone into the lake to deal with those creatures?

"That's actually not a bad idea," Remus said in surprise.

"I'll bet Hagrid would be more than happy to spill," Sirius agreed, "it might even be something insanely easy to get a hold of, since Hagrid's no great shakes at magic."

Harry just sighed though, feeling confident he wouldn't be asking Hagrid for help with this considering that would be confessing to the man who'd just given him such comfort that he had no idea what he was doing.

Hagrid hadn't waited for an answer, already patting Harry's shoulder with confidence that he'd win, while Harry sunk a few inches into the soft ground.

They all realized that at the same moment as Harry, so it was only strained smiles for Hagrid's over enthusiasm.

Harry couldn't bring himself to ask after that, and ruin Hagrid's proud smile.

By the night before the task, Harry was sure he was in a living nightmare.

Even Harry couldn't stop a forceful shiver at that, he'd only had just this amount of time before to practice a Summoning charm he'd already heard of, now he was supposed to find one and master it in less than twelve hours!

His panicky feelings managed to subside the moment he blinked his haze of fear away and realize where he was, at least feeling safe in the knowledge those around him weren't blaming him one bit for this mess he was in.

He knew that even if he found a spell by now he'd still have to learn it in time to use it. Why had he done this to himself? He should have been working on this since the beginning!

"Oh I don't think that's your fault," Lily said instantly, "you acted like everyone else in that situation would have."

Harry had to bite his tongue from bitterly pointing out Cedric had already figured it out first, and he'd probably come in first place by doing some masterful thing. At this point Harry wouldn't be surprised if the perfect Hufflepuff invented his own spell to combat this! Still he said none of that aloud, it wasn't his mother's fault she'd gotten him instead.

He was berating himself for all four years of his schooling and his slacking off, what if a teacher had ever mentioned how to breathe underwater?

"Then Hermione would know how to do this," James soothed, "and if she doesn't know and she's at least a year above you, then I'm confident this isn't your fault in lapse in knowledge."

Harry actually did feel himself relax at that being pointed out.

Still he and his friends were frantically turning pages in the library, but whenever the word water came about, it was usually some potion ingredient.

Ron snapped in frustration that this just wasn't a task to be done! The closest he'd found was a drought spell to clear puddles,

"But that's not strong enough for the whole lake," Lily sighed, that charm had crossed her mind but she hadn't suggested it for this reason.

but it wasn't powerful enough to drain a lake!

"Not now Sirius," Remus cut him off before Sirius could point out Lily had finished Ron's sentence. He pouted at his friend but didn't argue the point, he wanted to hear about this task being over already as much as anyone.

Hermione was still being insistent, saying it must be in here somewhere!

Ron ignored her, saying Harry's only option was to go down to the lake, stick his head in and demand they give back whatever they took.

Tension broke in the room once again because of Ron, Harry actually laughing so hard he started listing in his seat and he couldn't help it. He truly missed his best friend.

"I genuinely hope you try that," Sirius happily brushed some hair out of his face, "you will definitely get points for originality."

Remus held himself back from pointing out that it wouldn't work, but at least no one could say Harry hadn't tried.

Hermione hissed at him he was being ridiculous, there must be a way! She seemed to be taking the fact that she hadn't found her answer in the library as a personal insult, it had never failed her before.

"Actually it has several times now," James happily pointed out. "You didn't find out about the Stone in there, or the Chamber of Secrets."

"Technically the Stone was in a book she'd previously checked out," Lily countered just to poke back at her husband.

"And she did find information about the Basilisk in a book from there," Remus agreed.

"Okay, fifty, fifty," Harry pacified before Sirius could argue anything back.

Harry bemoaned that he hadn't ever tried to become an animagus like his godfather.

"Why would that have helped?" James asked in surprise, ignoring his internal wince that of course Harry would say Sirius' name rather than his, he'd actually seen Padfoot as more than a memory.

"I didn't know you couldn't choose the animal," Harry shrugged.

Ron agreed Harry could be a goldfish by now.

"Even if you could chose, I'm sure you would have picked something better than a puny fish," Remus sniffed.

"Like an alligator," Sirius happily agreed.

Hermione snapped they were being ridiculous, it took years to be one of those and you had to take the time to register and all sorts,

"That's half a lie," James raised a challenging brow, "you don't have to register."

Lily ignored him, she knew Harry had meant it as a joke and James returning Hermione with sarcasm wasn't helping anything.

Sirius clearly didn't as he kept going sadly, "but that first half is true, we started at the end of our third year and didn't manage it until the beginning of our fifth. Even if you had been practicing from the whole time you knew about them, you would only be able to go about half way."

"Still," Remus couldn't help but point out speculatively, "he could manifest certain parts, so if he had been something aquatic, it may have been enough to get him through this."

"None of this is helpful," Lily cut them all off for good.

still pointing out that the Improper Use of Magic Office kept a very strict list of people who could so that the power couldn't be abused.

"Hermione is clearly focusing on the wrong things here," Sirius muttered so Lily wouldn't snap again.

Harry told her to cool it, he'd been joking.

Hermione was ignoring him now to as she snapped how useless half of these spells were, who wanted to make their nose hair ringlets?

"And why wouldn't you?" James returned innocently.

Fred popped up then to say it was certainly a conversation starter.

"There's my point," James gestured vaguely to Lily's ever growing annoyance that she couldn't be done with this.

The three looked up in surprise to ask what the twins were doing here.

"Lost I'd guess," Remus snorted.

George told they'd been sent to get Ron and Hermione to see McGonagall.

"Why?" All of the boys asked at the same time Lily read out;

Hermione asked why, and Fred said he wasn't sure, but she'd looked grim about something.

"Well that's not encouraging," Sirius frowned.

"What could she be talking to them for and not Harry?" Remus agreed uneasily.

Harry exchanged an uneasy look with his friends, wondering if their head of house was going to tell them off for Harry getting help from them.

"Oh she wouldn't," Lily wriggled with unease at the idea.

"I'm positive that's not what this is about," James said with conviction, their old head of house was bound to give Harry more slack than that.

Still, they had no choice, so they promised they'd meet Harry back in the common room, to bring as many books with him as he could so they could keep looking.

Harry was left on his own through another mountain of books with such titles as A Guide to Medieval Sorcery, An Anthology of Eighteenth-Century Charms, and Dreadful Denizens of the Deep.

"Really, those last two sounded promising?" Remus said.

"I don't even remember what they're about anymore," Harry sighed, "even if I had found a spell, I was so tired by then I'd have read right over it."

They were all shifting around again in unease, that worry creeping up again of how had Harry lived through this one. It was much less scary than the dragon, and yet still somehow more stressful.

Harry eventually was kicked out because of curfew and did indeed drag many more thick spines with him up to his common room, where Crookshanks took to settling on his lap and people passed Harry by wishing him luck.

"Never mind that you must have looked like hell by then," James muttered mutinously.

All seemed convinced Harry would do something just as spectacular as his first event.

"Oh hey, what if you used your firebolt again," Sirius suddenly yelped in excitement. "You'd pelt through the water faster than swimming, and so long as you were fast and held your breath the whole time, you could be in and out."

"Have you ever flown a broom under water?" Lily asked in honest curiosity.

"Well, no," James answered, "but I think the idea has merits."

Remus clearly didn't agree as he quickly poked holes, "well it's still not a good idea not to test the idea first incase there is resistance, in which case Harry wouldn't be able to move any faster than normal, plus I'm positive for mermaids to be in there that it's going to be very deep and large, he still might not be able to hold his breath long enough to find what he's looking for."

"Well you're just no help at all," Sirius pouted as he sat back.

Harry couldn't find the breathe to answer them, and by midnight he was all alone.

"Where'd Ron and Hermione go?" Lily yelped in concern.

"They never came back," Harry admitted, starting to flatten his hair in nerves as he was sure he'd see them again sooner than he was thinking...but not how he was expecting.

He'd gone through his last book, and shame was settling in. He couldn't do this task. He'd have to go down there tomorrow and face Bagman's surprise, Karkaroff's smugness, Flure saying how unsurprised she was as he was just a little boy.

Harry slumped back in his seat, trying to ignore the mortification bubbling in him.

James caught sight of this and wasted no time in telling him, "you can't go blaming yourself for not getting this Harry. These were not designed for your age in mind, and honestly you still never should have been doing them in the first place."

Harry watched him for a moment before giving an honest smile. He didn't exactly feel better, but it still felt good no one in here was judging him for not being able to do so. He could suffer through all those other people's reactions so long as those in here shot their mouths off at them because of it.

He knew Malfoy would laugh himself silly, and Hagrid would be crestfallen.

Though Harry winced particularly hard at that one, knowing that would hurt the worst.

Harry stood abruptly from his seat, dislodging Crookshanks who gave him an unhappy hiss before slinking away.

"Yes, how dare the person move," Remus muttered to himself.

Harry made up his mind, going to fetch his Invisibility Cloak. He was going back to the library, and he would stay there until he found something!

"The fact that you've used that cloak to sneak into the Library more than anywhere else in that castle," Sirius shook his head, "I really never would have guessed it."

Lily quickly countered with, "well I'm not going to pretend to be disappointed."

Time kept marching on, soon it was almost three in the morning, and still Harry's nimble fingers kept pushing more pages along, one more book, it had to be in the next book...

The mermaid from the painting was still sitting on her rock, having a poke at Harry's head with his own broom while he floundered in the water.

"I'm thinking you finally fell asleep," James chuckled lightly.

"No, really?" Sirius challenged back. "I think Harry finally gave up and decided to hide in there with his broom."

Harry was trying to demand it back, but she just kept laughing and poking him in the head.

Harry told her to knock it off, that was hurting, but then another voice told him Harry Potter must wake up.

Lily sighed, hesitating before she read on to find out who was trying to wake her son up to face something like this, she really wasn't looking forward to the end results.

Harry insisted, with his eyes still shut, that he needed to stop being poked.

Dobby insisted he must keep poking Harry Potter, he must wake up.

"Why's Dobby the one fetching you?" Sirius did a double take in surprise.

"Why can he even see you?" James added, "you fell asleep under the cloak."

"Why didn't Ron and Hermione ever show up again?" Remus groused.

Lily was still ignoring all of those very good questions.

Harry sat up in surprise, the cloak had slipped off of him and he was still slumped over a book in the library, daylight shining on his face.

Dobby was still speaking to him, telling him he had ten minutes to get to the second task.

"Well at least Dobby poked you awake this time," Sirius offered helpfully, though he agreed he'd rather have just let Harry sleep through it at this point. "So at least he took your advice."

"As if I needed heart failure right before this," Harry absently agreed.

Harry repeated the time back in shock, even looking at his own watch to confirm, but when he saw Dobby was right, Harry slumped back in his chair in defeat.

Dobby was still being insistent, telling Harry Potter he needed to go, Dobby was going to help him.

"And how is he going to do that?" Remus demanded in surprise.

"Magic," James rolled his eyes, though now leaning forward eagerly as he was really curious to hear what Dobby had been up to so shushed Remus before he could respond.

Dobby had to help him, because Harry Potter needed to get back his Wheezy.

"His what?" All the boys asked at once.

Harry tried to ask what that was, and Dobby insisted Harry had to get back his Wheezy from the lake, the one who'd given Dobby his sweater.

Sirius flushed in shock, only just managing to stammer out, "they, they took Ron!"

"How on earth did they manage that?" James demanded of nothing, getting a little jittery at the thought.

"You think Hermione and him went down to the lake to test a theory of her's, and..." Lily trailed off as her mind failed to offer up anything after that.

Remus was shaking his head furiously as he objected, "I've never heard of Mermaids abducting anyone, there must be something else going on with this!"

Harry hadn't realized it before, but he was now feeling more panicky than ever about this task! Now not only had he no clue how to survive under the water, he had to find Ron as well!

Harry grasped what was going on, and began reciting that mermaid song again in horror.

"They wouldn't actually," Lily looked faint at the idea, unable to complete the thought aloud that they'd never really just leave them to die after an hour, then her mind flashed back to all those horrific stories she'd heard about the champions dying, and now they'd gone and put even more people into this Tournament! She kept reading in a feverish haste now, thinking that this school had officially lost its mind.

Harry begged Dobby for whatever help he had, and Dobby offered him gillyweed.

"Haven't I heard of that before?" James cocked his head to the side as it niggled at his mind.

"It's a plant," Lily yelped in shock, "used in potions to help you transform into aquatic life as it'll give you gills and fins. It's not native to Britain though, so I can't imagine where Dobby got a hold of that. I've only ever read about about it in an advanced Potion's text."

"Well whatever works to help me live through this," Harry said pointedly, and Lily took the hint and decided she'd figure out the elf later.

Sirius had to bite his tongue to caution Harry not take that, he still wasn't sure how much he trusted Dobby to be giving Harry anything.

Harry looked at the slimy green ball and asked what it did, and Dobby promised it would help Harry breathe underwater.

Harry couldn't help but ask how sure Dobby was, still remembering the last time the elf had tried to 'help' he'd gone a night without bones in his arm.

"Glad it's not just me," Sirius huffed under his breath, though Harry heard and acknowledged him with half a look of disbelief, and half agreement.

Dobby promised he knew what this was, he'd heard McGonagall and Moody talking about it! Dobby would not let Harry Potter lose his Wheezy!

"Well that we can agree on," Remus said.

Harry decided he'd have to trust this, he had no other choice. Stuffing the cloak and gillyweed onto his person, Harry thanked Dobby for his help as he sprinted out of the library.

"I can't deny I'm finally warming up to him," James grinned, Dobby had officially been very useful to Harry this year enough to make up for all his, err, issues in his second year.

Some people were still making their way out of the Entrance Hall from breakfast as Harry all but flew past them in his haste to make it down to the lake. Stands were already set up around it filled to the brim in anticipation to watch the lake.

"That's an interesting point I hadn't thought about," Remus couldn't stop himself blurting much to the annoyance of the others who wanted to get this task over with. "How on earth is this going to be spectated by anyone, wouldn't they just be watching the water's surface?"

"They could use Per Speculum," Lily offered distractedly, "cast it so that only the people in the stands could see through to the bottom of the lake."

"Can you use that spell to see through anything?" Harry asked in surprise.

"Inanimate objects," Lily agreed, "it's an old, tricky charm. I imagine some variation of it was used to create Moody's fake eye, plus whatever else was used to see through his own head as well."

While intrigued, Harry didn't press his mother for more details for now.

Harry came to a screeching halt in front of the judges stand, splattering mud on Flure.

"I'm sure she'll hex you for getting her dirty before she jumps into water," Sirius snorted.

A bossy voice demanded why he was so late.

"I hope Crouch is finally back," James said eagerly, "I want another look at him."

It was Percy, sitting in Crouch's spot.

"Why am I not surprised those two are described talking the same way," Remus snorted, as disappointed as the others Crouch had once again been a no show, but this just made his arrival in Snape's office all the stranger!

No one looked to question it now right before this task though.

Bagman waved him off, saying Harry should be allowed to catch his breath for a moment. Everyone except for Bagman and Dumbledore were smiling at Harry's arrival.

"Not sorry for your fortune," James grumbled.

Harry doubled over for a moment to indeed get back some air, and rub out the stitch in his side.

Remus couldn't help but think back and really realize how far Harry had just run in ten minutes, that really was quite a feet. He could have been a sprinter on the track team if he'd gone to a normal muggle school with that kind of talent.

He didn't have long as Bagman began spacing them out on the shoreline, pausing at Harry and asking if he knew what he was going to do?

"Even if he didn't, you going to teach him a spell in front of everyone in the next five seconds?" Sirius couldn't help but snap.

Lily rolled her eyes at him, Bagman was just trying to be friendly, but couldn't deny Sirius had a point this time.

Harry grasped the plant in his pocket as he said he was good to go. Bagman backed up then, turning on his Sonorous voice and calling for all to hear that on the count of three, the task would begin.

Time was up, a whistle blew, and Harry ignored everything around him as he struggled to remove his socks and shoes.

"You should have been allowed to at least do that," James sniffed. "The others showed up in swimwear."

"Price of being tardy," Lily sighed.

Then he stumbled into the icy waters, chewing furiously at the gillyweed. It was slimy and hard to force down his throat, his toes were numb and stumbling over the slick stones and smooth silt, and beyond in the stands Harry could hear laughter. He knew he probably looked ridiculous, wading in without seemingly doing anything.

"Not everything has to be flashy," Remus muttered, genuinely wondering what the other champions had come up with, but knew he could ask Harry later after the task.

Now he was up to his chest in the icy liquid, which felt more like fire the temperature was so unbearable, then a breeze blew through and Harry stood there shivering and waiting amid the jeering.

"How long does this stuff take to kick in?" Harry asked with unease, wondering if he should have been eating it on his run down there now.

"Only a few moments," Lily reassured, "it feels longer because you're waiting for it."

All at once he felt the change, the sides of his neck stung as his fumbling fingers felt slits appear there, his mouth and nose suddenly wouldn't take in air as if he had a pillow covering them.

"Fascinating," Sirius said genuinely, he'd never thought what it must feel like for a fish to be out of water, but Harry made a good point of it.

Without hesitating another moment, Harry flung himself into the water, sucked in the lake, and breathed freely again. Slamming his feet forward, Harry found he was suddenly moving much more easily through the water than he should have, and he looked down to see his fingers and toes were suddenly elongated and had bits of film between them all, he'd gone webbed with flippers.

"Looks like you got your wish," James grinned, "you sound like you've half turned into a frog."

"Frogs don't have gills by the time they have webbed feet," Remus reminded.

James rolled his eyes at him as that wasn't his point, but didn't start an argument over it for once.

The water now felt like the perfect temperature, and Harry could see much more clearly than he should have in the grime, plus he no longer needed to blink.

"I don't care what the others are doing," Sirius smiled, "this sounds by far the best way to do it."

Silence wasn't bleeding in, so as Harry propelled himself forward he had nothing to guide him through the foggy landscape. The smooth sand below quickly turned into a sea of seaweed and small fish occasionally flashed by and caught his eye, but there was no sign of Ron, merpeople, or even the giant squid.

"I think that would have been interesting to see up close," James snorted.

"Not if it decided you were shrimp," Remus said, trying to ignore the myths he'd heard about those things eating small whales in the wild, Harry didn't need to discover if that was true or not.

Nothing as far as the eye could see, Harry was staring unblinkingly ahead of him,

Sirius wished Harry would quit mentioning that part, he kept blinking spastically every time and it was annoying to have it pointed out.

trying to discern shapes through the gloom when, without warning, something grabbed hold of his ankle.

Lily couldn't help but startle just a bit, her foot trying to retract from nothing on instinct.

Harry twisted his body around to find a grindylow.

All five of them couldn't help a little shiver of unease at that, but were more thankful than ever Remus had been around last year to teach Harry about these things, Merlin knew what would be happening to him otherwise.

Harry went for his wand and shouted the spell Relashio, but to his surprise only a bubble came from his mouth, while a jet of water shot the creature in the head, creating a red welt in the green skin.

Harry couldn't help a little intrigue, he'd learned that spell over a year ago now but he'd only used it for the first time, and was honestly impressed it had even worked. While going over it in class, Professor Lupin had emphasized how hard this could be to pull off underwater where your spells could be temperamental since verbal spells were nay impossible to perform down there. Your best bet, if you hadn't learned silent spells yet, was to avoid them altogether.

Harry pulled his ankle free, but just as fast he had half a dozen chasing him and trying to pull him down. Harry kept swimming forward, shooting jets over his shoulder until another grabbed his and he gave a ferocious kick, knocking the creature loose and making it go crosseyed back into the weeds.

Lily forced herself to relax a bit now that Harry was away from that threat, still sending silent thank you's to Remus in her head for teaching Harry about those or this could have turned out much worse.

That excursion had done nothing to really help put him on a direction, so he was still pushing along when a voice asked how he was doing?

"Who's talking underwater?" James jumped in shock, the baby in his lap giving a particularly loud giggle for this.

Harry spun on the spot to find Myrtle.

"I don't want to know why she's down there, I do not want that image in my head again," Sirius groaned, covering up his ears and wishing he could do the same to his eyes to make that mental image go away.

"Who's using the bathroom during the middle of the tournament?" Remus muttered absently, but Lily ignored him more for not wanting to think about that than anything.

Harry tried to say her name, but all that came out was more bubbles, causing Moaning Myrtle to giggle.

"I think that's an oxymoron," James gave a surprised smile.

She pointed Harry in the right direction, but refused to come with him,

"It'd probably be cheating if she did," Lily agreed.

saying the merpeople chased her off when she went that way.

Harry gave her a thumbs up in thanks before heading that way, and knowing he was on the right path when he came across a stone statue depicting what must be merpeople chasing the giant squid.

"So, I'm guessing they don't get along," Remus couldn't help but be a bit interested at the idea of the conflict, he wouldn't deny he'd love to read a study on the matter if there was one out there.

The closer he swam, the more clearly he could hear that egg song again, now varying that his time was half up and if he didn't hurry, what he'd lost was going to stay here and rot.

"Gee, thanks," Harry shivered at the horrid idea, he half didn't want the memory back of what his best friend was going to look like in the mermaids clutches...plus he just knew there was someone else down here he was worried about.

Now Harry was swimming through the outskirts of an unmistakable village, some merpeople swimming to the windows of their houses to peak out at him. They looked nothing like the blonde in the prefects bathroom, these had gray skin and green hair, with thick burly features and powerful fish tails, and all were clutching spears.

All of them couldn't help but incline away from that thought, no one wanted to think what would happen if they all swarmed Harry at once. They were curious to know what had been done to even convince these mermaids to allow the tournament to go on in their dwellings, it was the height of uncommon.

Harry sped himself along, spotting a few features like gardens and pebbles lining a street way, even a grindylow tied to a stake like a pet.

"Bet you the equivalent of mermaid Hagrid lives in there," Sirius snorted.

Merpeople were emerging on all sides now, pointing at his webbed hands and gills, talking behind their hands to one another.

"Don't know why they bother," James said, "it's not like Harry speaks mermish."

"What would they even be whispering?" Sirius demanded, "hey look at that weird thing go, hope he drowns so we can have dinner."

"Don't make me silence you," Lily threatened without looking up.

Harry kept his speedy pace as he came across what must be the equivalent of their courtyard, the merpeople song louder than ever, and Harry laid eyes on a humongous statue of a merperson, four ropes bound to it.

"Guess I'm not surprised," Remus still couldn't stop the goosebumps climbing his limbs at the thought, "one for each person."

"I still want an explanation for how they ended up down there," Lily sighed, knowing she wasn't likely to get that until after the fact with the judges explaining, at least she hoped they would.

Ron was tied between Hermione and Cho.

"Why's Hermione there?" Harry yelped in surprise.

"There's no way you got two," James agreed.

Sirius couldn't help but snort in surprise though, saying, "Cedric's only been dating Cho for a few weeks, and she's the person he'd miss most?"

"I'd have missed Lily the most even before we started dating," James said at once, more to get a rise out of Sirius than anything.

It worked, as Sirius liked like a kicked puppy at once while bemoaning, "what do you mean it'd be Lily down there!"

"Please keep going," Remus begged of her, though she was watching with honest amusement and a faint blush, admitting she never would have found this so endearing before she'd married James but now it was hilarious to watch Sirius actually acting like this. She did reluctantly turn back to the pages though, wanting to hear about Harry and his friends getting out of this more than Sirius throwing a fit.

The last was a girl of about eight, her features leaving Harry in no doubt to be Fleur's sister.

"I'm sure it'll break Roger's heart when he hears it wasn't him," Remus smirked.

Sirius though went from indignant at his best friend, to speculation as he asked, "What's up with that?"

"What do you mean?" Lily asked. "I think it's sweet." Her mind was honestly caught on a time where she knew she would have felt the same way about her older sister.

"Sweet sure, but kind of heartbreaking," Sirius said with a shrug, "I mean Fleur's little sister is there, so what's up with Krum not having some kind of family there, or even a random Durmstrang student Harry doesn't know. Cedric, fine, maybe Prongs is right and he's had a liking for her for ages, but are you telling me the person that kid would miss the most is some random girl he met that year?"

All four of them were looking at Sirius slightly slack jawed, until he gave them a sheepish smile and said, "What? Am I wrong?"

"No," Remus shook his head sadly, "You're right, which is why that was so depressing."

"That poor guy," James agreed

With nothing more any of them could think on the matter, Lily went back to reading.

All four were clearly in a deep sleep, faint bubbles rising from their mouths.

Harry continued forward, still half expecting to be attacked any moment, but the surrounding merpeople did nothing but watch. Harry investigated the ropes keeping them in place, but the knots were not to be undone, and Harry wished he'd brought along that new knife Sirius had given him.

"I doubt a severing charm would work any better underwater," Remus agreed with a sigh.

Harry instead turned for help, trying to gesture that he wanted to borrow one of their very sharp spears, but the one just laughed and said they were not to help, only watch.

Harry tried to shout in frustration, but only more bubbles appeared, causing them to laugh harder.

"I don't get why he's still laughing," Lily grumbled, "this isn't funny."

Still Harry went in search of something else, and went down to the rocky shore and found a rather jagged rock. It took some time to hack Ron free, but then Harry looked around expectantly and still found none of the other champions. Why didn't they hurry up already?

"I am positive they're not stopping to pet the grindylows," James agreed, his leg starting to jitter in unease for the victims of this, at least baby Harry found it amusing.

Harry turned his attention on Hermione in impatience, but was at once dragged away by the merpeople, telling him to only take his and leave the others.

"Well that's just cruel," Lily yelped fiercely. "Harry got there first, I see no problems he shouldn't be allowed to save everyone."

"What would happen if the others don't show up?" Remus agreed uneasily.

"Let's hope we don't have to find out," Sirius huffed.

Harry refused, trying to fight them off, but the merpeople weren't letting him go if he kept trying to help the girls. Harry looked from them to Ron, wondering if he'd have time to get him out and come back for the others?

"Most likely not," Lily muttered to herself, the effects of gillyweed didn't last that long.

Would he be able to find this place again? He looked at his watch to see how much time was left but it had stopped working.

"Because that's helpful," James scowled.

Around him the merpeople were muttering in excitement again, and Harry saw Cedric swimming for them with a bubble over his head, distorting his features.

"What spell is that?" Harry asked in surprise, managing to relax even just a bit now that he wasn't alone surrounded by those things.

"Don't know," James said, his face just the same as Harry's, "I've never heard of that."

He mouthed at Harry he'd gotten lost, as he came forward with a knife and cut Cho free in no time.

"Well he just came all kinds of prepared," Sirius rolled his eyes, unnecessarily annoyed at him for bringing that along.

He pulled her upward and out of sight.

"Good to know Cedric cares so much for the others," James couldn't help but snap, Harry could have won already if he wasn't so busy making sure everyone got out of there, like Cho.

Harry still hovered there, waiting for Fleur and Krum. Time was running out, what would happen to the hostages after the hour was up?

Again they all shivered at such phrasing, but really they hoped that was being exaggerated somewhat! They wouldn't really leave those kids down there to die if say someone like Harry hadn't been able to get there, right?

Water babble started up again, and Harry saw another moving in, Krum, with the head of a shark.

"You know, I still can't help but like him just for that," James smirked, "he happened to do what I would have in this instance."

"A shark though," Sirius snorted in amusement, "a fish just wasn't grand enough, no he went for the big one."

"Exactly what Prongs would have done," Remus repeated with a smirk.

His new jagged teeth tried to tear into the flimsy ropes, but they were too small for him to properly gnaw on. Harry feared he'd rip Hermione in half trying.

"Oh I'm sure he's more careful than that," Lily insisted for comfort at once.

"Sharks can feel pulses in the water," Remus offered helpfully, "so I'm sure he can be precise enough not to hit anything he shouldn't be."

Harry swam forward and punched his shoulder hard as he could to get his attention, offering his own jagged rock.

"It's too bad you didn't have that same excuse to hit Diggory," Sirius smirked, which Harry didn't deny.

Krum took the offering, freed Hermione, and was out of sight in no time. Still Harry couldn't swim away with Ron, his eyes trained every which way in hope for Fleur to arrive.

Time was running out, and Harry got desperate.

He took back the stone for himself and went after the little girls ropes, but again the merpeople tried to stop him. Harry pulled out his wand.

Remus couldn't help going a little wide eyed in fear for Harry doing that. He was lucky that whatever was going on these merpeople were playing along, they weren't known for cooperating well with wizards. Harry pulling a wand on them could break whatever truce had been called for this task to play out.

He shouted at them to get out of it, and while bubbles only came out, he got the feeling they understood anyways.

"Bit hard to misinterpret a wand on your nose," Sirius agreed.

They stopped trying to force him away, and Harry kept at his task. Still they were clearly not happy, but stayed well away from him now, so knowing he had the advantage, Harry told them they had till the count of three to get lost, holding up three fingers just to make sure they got the point.

"You'd be great at charades," James couldn't stop himself saying even as he wriggled around in anticipation for this to almost be over

By the time he reached two, they'd scattered.

They all released a breath of relief at that, Harry really should count himself lucky that hadn't gone worse.

Harry quickly got moving then with Ron and the girl, his mind still fearing what was going to happen when time ran out, would they pull him back to the depths?

Harry looked wildly around for someone to tell him he was being ridiculous at that thought, and when no one did but in fact looked slightly even more worried, it wasn't exactly a comfort. Now with both of Harry's hands tied in fact with these two, he couldn't even keep his wand on them as a threat, and what about when the gillyweed ran out?!

Did they eat humans?

Remus really didn't like the fact that he wasn't a hundred percent sure about that fact, he'd heard conflicting stories on the matter and now didn't feel like the time to get a confirmation.

Harry kept himself going, the water steadily growing bright around him, but not fast enough. His muscles were starting to cramp, he could feel himself getting waterlogged, the gills were vanishing and he could no longer draw breath, but still he paddled furiously on as the flippers vanished, he knew the air was above him if he could just get close enough...

Lily forced herself to stop reading no matter how much she didn't want to, just to look up at her son for a moment and tell him, "you and me really need to have a talk about how your mind comes up with the best ways possible to make this tension ten times worse than it should be."

Harry gave her an uneasy smile, unsure if he was being scolded or she was just looking for a release, but she was already turning back to the pages.

then his head broke the surface.

Finally they all managed to breathe with ease again as well, lighting another check mark down in their brain, two down, just one more to go! That last task wasn't going to be over fast enough for them.

Air washed over his face, he erupted in shivers again but he didn't care as he pulled Ron and the girl up with him. Along came several green heads, but they were all smiling.

"Well that's nice," Remus huffed, still half wanting to curse those stupid things for freaking Harry out as much as the grindylows.

The crowd in the stands was going crazy, shouting and screaming as many seemed to fear that Harry had reemerged with someone dead.

Harry suddenly spasmed, his eyes rolling into the back of his head for a moment and shaking so hard he nearly fell over, but the yellow haze swallowing his brain was over as fast as it had come, and he blinked back into the world around him feeling very close to vomiting but having no idea why. He tried to both explain himself and apologize around shaking lips, but though the tight worry in all of their eyes didn't lessen any, Sirius kept a tight hold on Harry's shoulder and James was juggling his infant and watching Harry like at any moment he was prepared to cast a protective charm on him to stop his head hitting anything, no one could bring themselves to ask Harry a single question of why on earth Harry would have a reaction to that. It didn't stop them from turning over what Lily had read over and over in their head...

The two seemed fine though, the girl glancing fearfully around her as she clung to Harry for support, Ron spitting out a bit of water and telling Harry how wet it was.

Harry forced out some approximation of a laugh, his skin still too white for it to be believable, still blinking far too fast for them to believe he wasn't still trying to process what he was hearing rather than some accumulation of memories.

Though for the life of him Sirius actually didn't want to make the joke, still far to worried about what Harry had almost remembered to feel it, he still said, "at least you can always count on Ron to point out the important stuff."

Harry gave him such a relieved smile it had been worth it, and James sat back in his seat and kept the baby in his lap all the closer to him to ignore the interaction while still keeping an eye on Harry.

Then Ron saw the little girl and asked why she was here?

"Did he actually expect him to leave her?" Remus asked absently, trying to refuse to allow his mind to guess where Harry's had gone and mostly failing so coming up with far too many options of what could be bothering him.

Lily fidgeted with the pages for a few moments, not particularly wanting to answer but it would still feel better than letting her own mind wander. "Well if that's Ron's first response, then I guess we were worried for nothing. Perhaps the merpeople would have brought up the unrescued kids on their own."

She tried to instill as much confidence as she could, especially into the first part of that statement for Harry's benefit, wanting to believe more than anything Harry's flashback or memory relapse of whatever he'd nearly felt wasn't going to be as horrible as they were all thinking...though no one really believed that.

Harry explained Fleur never showed up, and he couldn't just leave her!

Ron told Harry he was being a prat, had he really taken that song seriously?

"That's a good point," Sirius quickly shot off, now knowing there had always been one fell safe way to get Harry to laugh and hoping it would work now, "how come I wasn't the one down there! You'd miss Ron more than me?"

He splayed such puppy eyes, Harry really did cave and give a genuine laugh for that.

Dumbledore wouldn't have let them drown!

"He makes it sound so obvious," James grumbled, thinking Ron wouldn't have said the same if he'd heard of all the past tournaments like they had. Lily's panicky little worries at the start of this didn't seem so foolhardy now.

Harry insisted the song had said-

but Ron told Harry they'd only phrased it that way so the champions would return in the time limit. Had Harry really come up last because he was acting the hero?

"Acting is inaccurate," Remus said with a strained smile, but all for happily talking about before Harry came out of the water and they'd gained a new worry. "What Harry did is very brave, and I'm still offended Krum and Diggory clearly didn't even consider doing the same."

Harry gave a bone deep shiver, something of what Remus had said hadn't exactly made him feel better and in fact was making an onset of his migraine reappear, but Lily quickly realized this and kept reading loudly before Harry could lose whatever color he'd even partially regained.

Harry felt stupid and annoyed at the same time. It was all good for Ron to be saying this, he'd been asleep the whole time. He hadn't seen how spooky that lake bottom was.

"Remus' point exactly," James agreed.

Instead of answering, he told Ron to help him out with the girl, she didn't seem able to swim very well.

The three hauled themselves back to the shore, accompanied by the merpeople singing their screechy song above the surface.

"I'll bet the crowd just loved hearing that," Sirius rubbed his ear absently.

Madam Pomfrey was already tending to the other champions and their rescuees.

There it was again, Harry was now confident someone in that list of names had been the cause of such a powerful memory trying to swarm him, but even the thought of guessing had him wanting to press his hand to his mouth to wipe sweat from his lip and had his stomach curling in protest along with his mind growing in pain.

Dumbledore and Bagman stood nearest to the shore, smiling out at them, but Percy wasn't waiting. Looking much younger than usual and very white, he went splashing out into the water to meet them.

"Aww," Lily couldn't help but coo slightly, wondering just how much Percy had been told of what was going on, how seriously he'd have taken this task and if he'd been wondering about Harry taking so long because something was wrong with Ron.

Meanwhile Madame Maxime was trying to restrain Fleur,

"Oh good," Sirius said absently, he really had been concerned what had happened to her to stop her grabbing her sister and was glad she hadn't been a casualty this challenge.

who was busy being hysterical, fighting tooth and nail to return to the water.

"I don't want to hear anyone calling Harry over reacting now," James arched a brow, if honestly impressed at the girl. "She's the one who's clearly thinking her sister was really in danger."

"Apparently it was just the actual victims who didn't know they weren't really victims," Remus snorted, though that still didn't track right with Krum and Diggory. Either they'd worked out the hostages weren't really in danger, which was odd as Harry and Fleur hadn't gotten that memo, or they hadn't stuck around enough to care.

She was screaming for Gabrielle, demanding to know if she was okay, or hurt?

Harry tried to tell her she was fine, but was so exhausted he could barely catch his own breath.

Percy had Ron seized tight to him, while Ron was vainly struggling to get free.

Causing all of them to have smiles of happiness for that moment, erasing the last of their worry for whatever Harry had been feeling from the top of their minds, for now. Whatever he'd been remembering would come, and they'd deal with it then, for now it was to adorable to pass up the moment for Sirius to tease Percy, "I'm going to remember this the next time he's spouting off about how important his cauldron bottom report is."

Flure got herself free and came forward, clinging to her sister and apologizing that it had been the grindylows that had stopped her.

"Well obviously Beauxbatons doesn't have as good of a DADA teacher as Harry got," James smiled pompously for his friend, while Remus rolled his eyes at Prongs.

She was in tears as she sobbed over her sister, while Harry was forced over by the others and had a blanket wrapped so tight around him he felt like a burrito, and was force fed a potion that made his ears steam.

"Don't want you catching a cold on top of everything," Lily happily agreed.

Hermione waddled up to him, praising what a good job he'd done, figuring this out all by himself.

"She's so surprised when I can do anything without her," Harry mock pouted.

Harry was fixing to correct he'd had help from Dobby, but then he spotted Karkaroff trying to listen in. He'd been the only judge not to be so visibly relieved by their return.

"As if I needed more confirmation he was a heartless scumbag," Sirius scoffed.

Harry pitched his voice as loud as he could for him to hear that Harry had indeed done just that.

James let out a booming laugh of pride at that, ruffling his son's hair as the father told that had been a classic move.

Krum tried to draw back Hermione's attention that she had a beetle in her hair,

There was a slight buzz in the base of Harry's skull, something telling him he should know something about that, but since he was still suffering from his last memory shock he didn't even give the feeling a glance.

Harry was sure Krum was trying to remind her who'd really saved her from the lake

Lily couldn't help but feel just slightly bad for Krum, he clearly really liked Hermione and yet he was most likely jealous of any attention Hermione ever gave Harry.

but Hermione just impatiently brushed the bug away and kept talking to Harry, telling him he was way outside of his time limit though and asking if he'd gotten lost?

Harry didn't really answer fully.

"More like, I found you first, I just stuck around the longest," Remus finished for him when it was clear Harry was going to trail off, in modesty or embarrassment he wasn't sure.

His stupidity was growing by the moment, now that he was clear headed it seemed obvious Dumbledore wouldn't have let them die just because the champion had failed.

"Well sure, in hindsight," Lily rolled her eyes, "but no one had better blame you for thinking otherwise, I wouldn't have really put it past them at this point."

He should have just grabbed Ron and gone, Cedric and Krum had.

"I hope you don't start using them as role models," James sniffed in disgust, he wasn't particularly fond of either of them even if they did sometimes amuse.

They hadn't taken the mersong seriously...

"How do you know how I would have taken it?" Sirius demanded at once, "you never showed it to me?"

Harry still laughed again, whatever feelings he had at himself vanishing at Sirius' distraction.

Dumbledore was crouching at the water's edge in conversation with what seemed to be the chief merperson.

"Why am I not surprised Dumbledore speaks mermish," Remus chuckled, suddenly this whole task made a lot more sense to him, it wouldn't surprise him in the least if Dumbledore was actually on friendly terms with the merpeople.

When he was done he called the judges over to him so they could discuss all of the champions before releasing the scores.

Madam Pomfrey was now trying to rescue Ron from Percy, then tried to go for Fleur and her sister, but the elder girl refused and insisted her sister was to be looked after first. Then she swooped in on Harry, thanking him for saving her though he hadn't had to.

Harry belligerently agreed, now wishing he'd left her tied up with the rest of the girls.

Sirius released a sharp bark of laughter, guess Harry had a petty side when he got embarrassed.

"Oh I'm sure Hermione would have loved to hear that one," Lily giggled.

"Don't let Cho hear you thinking that one," James gave his son a winning smile, "she probably thought you grabbed the wrong hostage, she was likely thinking she'd been both yours and Cedrics."

"Yeah, yeah, laugh it up," Harry grumbled at the lot of them still smirking. "You know you were thinking the exact same thing as me."

"Yes," Remus agreed, "but we admit to it."

Fleur bent and gave Harry a kiss on each cheek, much to his burning embarrassment,

Harry was now wishing he'd passed out when he had the chance, it would have been much kinder than having to watch them all collapse laughing at his cherry red face.

then she turned on Ron and thanked him for helping as well.

Ron agreed he'd done a bit, still looking hopefully at her.

"I'm sure he's very hopeful for something," Sirius got out around his laughter.

Fleur swooped down and kissed him too.

Harry couldn't help joining in the laughter this time, Ron had looked so pleased and flustered at the same time.

Hermione looked furious,

"What's eating her?" James demanded lightly, "they're just getting thanked is all."

"I'm sure Hermione's just upset because she was fixing to, err, thank him as well," Sirius tried to insist around his chuckles.

but was interrupted by Bagman announcing for all to hear that the Merchieftainess had told of what all had happened and the scores were as follows out of fifty.

Flure had successfully used a Bubble-Head Charm,

"I've never heard of that," Lily pouted.

"You think it's a new spell invented?" Remus asked curiously. "Sounds simple enough in theory, wonder what year it's taught at."

"Clearly more than a fifth year, or Hermione would have come across it," Sirius shrugged.

but was attacked by grindylows, and failed to retrieve her hostage. So was awarded twenty- five points.

"Still half credit for the magic, seems fair," Lily agreed.

Polite applause followed while Flure told how she didn't deserve any.

Sirius couldn't deny he sort of liked her again for that, she clearly wasn't all about herself as she put on if she was humble enough to admit that.

Diggory, also using the same Charm,

"I'm extremely insulted for Harry," James pouted, "it would have been nice if he'd passed that along to Harry along with his stupid clue, or at least told him what book to be in."

Lily wanted to argue that would have been handing Harry the whole task, even Harry hadn't told Cedric how he was getting past his dragon, but really she wouldn't have been upset about it either as Harry had clearly needed the help.

"He should get points off for using the same thing as another champion," Sirius sighed. "I'd accuse them of conspiring."

was the first back but still outside his time limit of an hour by a minute.

"Wow, even first place didn't get there fast enough," Remus said in surprise, "I think they didn't estimate that time limit correctly."

"I'll send them a note," Sirius said with a careless shrug.

He was given forty-seven points.

His supporters went wild with applause while Harry's hopes plummeted, if Cedric had been late Harry was doomed.

Krum had used some Transfiguration work and came back second, winning forty points.

"I can see that," James nodded along, though he'd half been hoping both those boys would get some points taken off for not being like Harry and hanging around, though this could possibly be more of a reason why Cedric hadn't gotten a perfect score. James was certainly going to keep thinking so.

Karkaroff clapped particularly hard, looking very superior.

"I'm sure he would have awarded a whole fifty if he could have gotten away with it," Sirius muttered to no one's disagreement.

Then there was Harry, who'd arrived first but according to eyewitness had stayed behind until all hostages were safe, even retrieving the last hence his delay in returning. His two friends looked at him half in exasperation, half commiseration.

Harry couldn't stop a small smile though, he missed being around his friends and was imagining what they would have said to him had they been here with him now.

Most of the judges, Bagman paused to give a nasty look at Karkaroff, had felt this showed his moral fiber and should be given full points.

"Wow," all of them blinked in surprise, pleased beyond words Harry was getting recognized for this act, and Karkaroff could sod off for thinking otherwise.

Instead, he'd received forty-five points.

Harry blushed as he was congratulated all around for this, pleased beyond words at their praise no matter how much he tried to convince them to move along, it wasn't that big of a deal, it's what anyone would have done...

Harry laughed in surprised as his friends began jumping around for joy, Ron congratulating him he wasn't just thick, he'd been showing moral fiber!

"Technically you were doing both," James beamed at him, "you're just that good at multitasking."

Fleur was clapping along happily as well, and while Krum tried to turn away and talk to Hermione again, she was too busy cheering for Harry to notice.

"That's his problem," Sirius sniffed, "he should have used that stupid shark head for something more useful than nearly ripping her in half."

Bagman rounded off by saying that the final task would happen at dusk on June 24th.

Harry felt a mounting sense of doom at the very idea, but he was still enjoying himself just a little too much at the warm attention from his family to give it much thought.

The champions would be given more details before hand, in the meantime, they were free to go.

Harry felt dazed as Madam Pomfrey began ushering them all up to the school for a warm change of clothes. He had ages until June to worry about anything again.

"Which will hopefully be your problem," Lily shot at Sirius just to get him to stop smirking for a moment, which worked much to her pleasure.

Next time he was in Hogsmeade, Harry decided as he walked back up the steps into the castle, he was going to buy Dobby a pair of socks for every day of the year.

They were very happy indeed they could end a chapter once again laughing outright, no one denying Dobby more than deserved it as Lily got up to swap the book in her hand for her baby while James took the hefty object, noting they were well on their way to being halfway done this year. Hopefully nothing to much more exciting could happen.

[mst3kproject]

The Equinox

'Aleczilla51297′ appears to have made a tumblr purely for the purpose of telling me I need to review Equinox and Godzilla vs Hedorah.  I decided to do Equinox first because I’ve already seen Godzilla vs Hedorah, which is one of the preachier Godzilla movies but does have that hilarious bit where the big guy flies by using his atomic breath as a rocket.  If Equinox turns out to be a #fuck this movie entry, then Godzilla can act as a sort of a palate-cleanser.  And so, without further ado:

Something blows up, a woman called Susan dies, and a dude gets run down by a driverless car.  My Dad would feel vindicated – he finds the whole idea of self-driving cars untrustworthy.  The victim, whose name is David Fielding, ends up in a mental hospital, where he tells his story to a psychiatrist.  Seems that Dave, his pal Jim, Jim’s girlfriend Vicky, and Vicky’s friend Susan, headed up into the mountains for a picnic with their old teacher Dr. Waterman. These people are all idiots.

The four young people arrive to find Waterman’s cabin destroyed and a creepy old man living in a cave nearby, who gives them a locked book. Because the characters don’t know they’re in a bad movie, they don’t realize that the book is clearly the fucking Necronomicon, and decide to crack it open and read it while they eat their KFC. To nobody’s surprise, they’re soon being chased around the countryside by dumb stop-motion monsters.  At the end everybody’s dead but Dave, who’s in the mental hospital waiting for the fulfillment of a prophecy that said he would die a year and a day after the original events, but that’s not a spoiler because it was the opening scene.

Let’s go over the shit that happens when these four clowns arrive at Dr. Waterman’s.  The cabin’s destroyed and the park ranger who discusses it with them says his name is Asmodeus.  Does that sound like a signal you should get the hell out of there?  No?  Okay, how about when they find a castle they can’t remember being there before?  Still no?  Well then, on their way to the castle (which later vanishes behind a wall of invisibility, probably because they couldn’t afford interior sets), they come across a cave with Green Goblin laughter echoing out of it, and weird velociraptor footprints all around.  Would you leave, or would you light up some torches and go check it out?  What about when you find a partially-mummified corpse in the cave?

The whole first ten minutes of the flashback that comprises most of the narrative is a litany of things I’m pretty sure anybody would flee from in real life.  I don’t believe much in the supernatural but if I saw all that I would be sure that multiple crimes had been committed and that I wanted no part of it.  The characters of Equinox, however, insist on investigating themselves, and continue to make stupid, stupid decisions for the entire run time.  Yes, let’s all go in a group to check and make sure the monster is dead.  Let’s hang around and bury the bodies ourselves instead of getting back to civilization for a police report and a good stiff drink.  Let’s collect the picnic stuff before we leave because that basket cost at least $15 at Wal-Mart.  It’s the kind of movie where you start to get annoyed that the characters aren’t dying fast enough.  When we finally get back to the opening shot I mainly felt relief that the movie was almost over.

The MST3K movie Equinox most reminds me of is The Day Time Ended: there are people in the middle of nowhere and, for some reason, a bunch of random stop-motiony things happen that never actually add up to a story.  Stuff comes and goes without serving any purpose other than to be creepy.  Who was Crazy Cave Guy?  I at first assumed he was the missing Dr. Waterman but Waterman turns up later and immediately dies, so what’s going on with this other guy?  What’s about the cave mummy… who was that?  Was the man who showed up to snatch the book actually Dr. Waterman or just a demon in his form?  Why is there a random graveyard in the middle of the woods?  Why does the psychiatrist have a creepy monster mask on his wall?  What’s up with Asmodeus apparently trying to rape Susan without even unbuttoning his pants, and later possessing her so that she does the same thing to Vicky?

Dialogue specifies that Dr. Waterman was a geologist, which seems an odd choice for somebody to be translating ancient documents.  I mean, there’s no reason why a geologist can’t have a side interest in ancient manuscripts, but when a movie takes the trouble to tell you something like that there’s usually a reason why.  Geology is never important to the plot, even tangentially.

It must be said that Equinox makes slightly more sense than The Day Time Ended, in that we’re actually given a reason why these events are happening.  Dr. Waterman had acquired and translated the Necronomicon and could not control the demons he summoned (I am convinced that Sam Raimi saw Equinox when he was around twelve and thought, shit, I could make a better movie than this!).  A huge tentacle creature destroyed his cabin, and then there’s the sabre-toothed ogre, the giant green caveman, and of course, the devil himself.  These creatures have a motivation: they are determined to get the book back, whether through force or persuasion.  The events could still happen in any order, but it all has a common core, rather than being just a collection of Concepts.

In capable hands this story could be made to work (see previous parentheses), but sadly none of the hands involved in making Equinox were remotely capable.  The acting is abysmal, mostly just people standing around awkwardly reciting their lines. All the dialogue was then dubbed over in post-production, which makes it even more stiff and awkward.  There’s a bit where a guy reads a letter as if he has to sound out each word.  The direction and music are bland.  Even the costumes are awful.  You’d think it would be hard to fuck up costumes in a movie set in the present, but it looks like everyone just turned up to set in their street clothes and they went with that.  Good costuming can tell us a lot about characters but the outfits here say nothing. Also, both Vicky and Susan are blondes in blue shirts, and once Susan’s hair falls out of its bun they’re basically indistinguishable.

The characters have no discernable personalities.  How they react to things changes from scene to scene, with nobody’s motives clear.  The only thing that remains constant is Jim wanting to leave while Dave always wants to stay and take care of something or other.  Stuff happens that could result in character development but none of it is ever followed up.  The most notable example is when Dave feels terrible guilt over having apparently killed Dr. Waterman, but this is forgotten a few minutes later and we never even find out if the dead man were really Dr. Waterman.

The effects are uniformly bad, but not usually enough so to be entertaining in themselves.  The castle is an obvious matte painting and the stuff on the other side of the portal, whether it’s Hell or the Dark Dimension or I don’t even know, is just the same spot in the woods with an orange filter over it.  There’s a stupid spinning thing used to represent Asmodeus exercising assorted dark powers.  The devil and the sabre-toothed ogre are both stiff and shitty stop-motion puppets.  The animation is surprisingly competent for a movie with the budget of Jr. High drama club, but they’re still not good.  The one exception is the giant green caveman, which looks dumb but is quite convincing as occupying space and interacting with the characters.

One might expect that this movie would be about the temptation of evil.  The monsters in it are summoned using a book of dark knowledge, and in trying to get the book back Asmodeus offers Jim anything he wants – money, prestige, women, you name it.  Problem is, there’s never any sign that the main characters are in fact tempted.  The crazy guy in the cave wants nothing from the book except to get rid of it.  He passes it on to Dave and Jim with evident glee.  Dr. Waterman’s interest in it, according to his notes, was purely scientific.  He summoned demons just to see if he could do it, but he doesn’t appear to have gained anything thereby except the knowledge that it works.  The main characters never even attempt to use the book, even to get themselves out of this mess, they just run around trying to keep it out of the hands of the monsters.  I’d say it’s like if every character in The Lord of the Rings was book-Faramir, but only a colossal nerd would use an example like that.

Honestly, I think this movie was about the wrong characters.  Dr. Waterman’s process of discovering the book and learning to use it, only to realize he’s unleashed things he cannot control, would probably have been a much more interesting story.  The characters from this film could have shown up at the end to fish the book out of the mess, with the implication that they will be its next victims.  This would have been a much better way to explore the ideas of temptation, making a Faust-like character out of Waterman as he is tempted not by riches or fame, but by knowledge and power.

Equinox is not quite #fuck this movie bad.  In order to earn that tag, a film has to be unwatchably dull and/or morally repugnant. I didn’t have any trouble sitting through Equinox but I also didn’t really enjoy the experience.  As movies about demonic forces go, it’s pretty bland and nothing much really seems to happen.  I guess that means I have to forgive Aleczilla51297 for sending it to me, but I’m still looking really forward to a Godzilla film or two.

[dailydaydreamings]

Best in the Worst Way, Part 6

The Reader has been having a love affair with two Avengers and gets caught in a sticky situation. She’s suddenly faced with life decisions she’s not prepared for, including who to love, what she wants, and is this all worth it?

Please enjoy this next part. I’ll be mia for a bit but I’ll be back very soon ;) — K

“All I’m saying,” you placed both hands on your hips, “is that if we live here, we have our privacy. I never said you couldn’t protect us.”

You both stood on either side of the breakfast bar in your kitchen, a pros and cons list between you of where to live when the babies come. Which had very quickly turned into a fight.

Bucky planted both hands on the counter, grinding his teeth, “And I think it’s a terrible idea. Could you imagine the support system we’d have on the compound when the babies come?”

You roll your eyes, remembering the year you spent sneaking and hiding in Steve’s room. The amount times someone would barge in and you found yourself in the closet was astronomical. No one ever questioned Steve and Bucky in their underwear on the bed though.

“We will have a support system wherever we go, not one Avenger has any concept of boundaries,” you snap. “Tony’s hired my OB-GYN for fuck’s sake.”

Bucky leaned forward to rest his elbows on the counter, “I’m not saying it’s not creepy, but it’s still probably for the best.”

You raise an eyebrow, “Because I’m so ill of health and incapable of taking care of myself.”

For the record, you hadn’t passed out in a week and you’d worked 38 hours (and only four on Saturday). Tony was still pushing you to scale back more. Despite some nausea, you just felt tired.

“No,” he sighed, “because you’re growing two super human babies and no one knows what that means.”

You wave your pen; “Exactly. She might not even know what she’s doing either.”

He groans, dragging a hand over his face.

“Really?” You tighten your grip on your pen.

“You’re making this difficult,” he admits. “Is this how the appointment is going to go tomorrow?”

You debate stabbing him with the pen, “We’re still not living on the compound.”

He throws his hands in the air, “Steve would agree with me.”

He immediately winced at his words.

The phrase was so familiar. It started with what to buy for dinner and where that new painting should be hung in the bedroom. It was said so often, because they did know each other best. It always got an eye roll from you, but you typically give in after that.

Not any more.

You stared him down, jaw clenched.

He got up to say he was sorry and you brushed past him, out the door.

————

You stood on the roof of compound, an unlit cigarette in your fingers. You used to smoke religiously by the end of high school, after university you only smoked on very rare occasions of pure, unrelenting stress.

Now, you had a nearly unbearable craving.

You even took out your lighter and chucked it off the roof. Which left you staring down at this stupid cigarette, wishing you could drink.

You stood there, for over an hour, debating what you were going to say. At which point, a helicopter landed on the roof.

You shoved the cigarette into your purse and crossed your arms over your chest as Steve and Natasha got out.

Steve stopped as soon as he saw you, jeans, no makeup, and your hair in a messy bun. Not like yourself at all.

Natasha patted him on the back and walked towards you. “Feeling ok?” She asked.

“Uh-huh,” you didn’t take your eyes off Steve. He crossed his arms over his chest, looking pissed.

“I’ll come see you tomorrow then,” she said. You might have nodded.

When you were alone, Steve asked, “How did you know when I was getting back?”

You shrugged, “Perk of my job, I know all your schedules. Fury sent me an update a couple hours ago, he always does. If you have a problem with me knowing where you are, I’m sure this can be addressed.”

He stared at you blankly, “I know you’re pissed.”

You bit back your anger. “Speak now Rogers or forever hold your peace.”

He broke your state and looked down, “I never wanted this.”

You nodded, looking down.

“Our relationship was always physical,” he said, “at least it was for me. Just something to help me cope. I loved the two of you for it, but I never wanted it to be more.”

You attempt to blink back tears, more in vain than anything.

“I’m sorry,” he continued. “Really I am. Children were never supposed to be part of this.”

Crossing your arms over your chest, you spoke the words you had been keeping deep inside, “How do you think I feel Steve? You think I wanted this? My life has always been about school or my career. I thought sleeping with you two would be freeing, but it ended up being a big secret and I ended up being a method for you two to cope. My life has never been about me and suddenly it’s going to be about being a mom.”

Tears now freely fell and you instantly felt like the worst person. Bucky wanted these babies so bad and he was so excited. Every second was about the babies.

But you still had some reservations.

You didn’t want him to know and it felt like you were constantly chocking on your secret.

Steve walked towards you, “It’s not too late then, right?” He grasped your arms, looking down at you hopefully. “Get rid of them and we can go back.”

Your eyes widened in surprise. Was he really asking your to get an abortion?

It brought you back to the moment you found out you were pregnant. You thought about it so hard and so much you were almost sure you would go through with it.

And then you saw Bucky’s reaction.

You pulled back, “Are you joking?”

“What?”

“You have got to be fucking kidding me.”

He frowned at you.

You ran your hands through your hair, nearly screaming in frustration. “I told you weeks ago that I’m pregnant. The time to talk me out of this would have been then.”

You could just picture it in your mind. Instead of Bucky crying happily and freely, and planning a nursery, Steve would have interjected and told you to get an abortion. Bucky would have shrunk away and wouldn’t have opened his mouth. You probably would have gone through with it.

It would have killed Bucky, and you wouldn’t have even known.

Now, the babies were starting to have names and faces.

You resented them in part, but you were staring to care for them.

You had a choice to make, apparently, between two lovers. One that wanted to keep two babies, and one that wanted no part.

It had always been the three of you, and your world seemed to rapidly becoming smaller.

Steve looked down at you through his beautiful, thick eye lashes and said, “This doesn’t have to be over.”

———

Bucky poured himself a cup of tea, hoping it would calm his nerves.

He wondered where you’d gone, you were so mad. He was fully ready to concede to living at your apartment, if that’s what you wanted.

Though, he had a funny feeling this had nothing to do with the apartment.

He knew you were feeling the effects of Steve leaving on a very personal level and he was to. It wasn’t right, it wasn’t fair. It wasn’t your fault.

It still stung.

It hurt so bad that Steve didn’t want a future with the two of you. Your children. That he could walk away like if had all meant nothing. How could he—

The door burst open and suddenly he was pressed against the counter, your body pressed into his, pulling him in for a searing kiss.

He kissed you back, placing his hand on your waist. You were already shedding your cardigan.

“What’s this about?” he pulled away and you kissed his neck. “Where did you go?”

You pulled back, tossing off your tank top and slowly unbuttoning your jeans. “Steve‘s made his choice. I’m making mine. I want you and these kids and everything that goes with it.”

That was enough. He picked you up with one arm to carry you to the bedroom.

The fights didn’t matter anymore. Everything after your discussion with Steve seemed to be irrelevant.

You could do this. The couple thing. The kids. You could do it without Steve, you convinced yourself.

Over and over again.

Even when Bucky threw you on the bed, kneeled between your legs, and made love to you with his tongue.

Even when Bucky held you in his arms and fucked you hard into the mattress, making your toes curl and your voice go hoarse.

Even when he flipped you into your stomach a couple hours later and teased you until you were crying before giving you want you needed.

Even when you woke up in the morning to featherlight kisses on your neck, shoulders, breasts, that made your insides tingle. Only to start round three.

You just kept thinking to yourself, You could do this. The couple thing. The kids. You could do it without Steve.

———

“Come in,” you called out.

Natasha stepped into your office, looking distant and guarded.

You tried to keep a pleasant expression on your face as you shut your laptop. You automatically grabbed a pen and started fidgeting.

“I was hoping you’d stop by,” you smiled, “I wanted to talk to you about last night.”

She held up a hand, “Don’t worry about it. I was hoping you could do something for me actually.”

You nodded, cautiously.

She sat down across from you, “Tony has me booked for a press conference next week, can you cancel it but don’t make it obvious I don’t want to go?”

You chuckled, writing that down. “Of course.”

“I also want to visit that women’s shelter I volunteered at last month. Can you get in touch with them for me?”

“Absolutely.”

“One more thing, can you book one of the conference rooms for me. The big one, but have all the tables and chairs removed?”

You nodded, making another note, “For when and what?”

“Let’s say five-ish months from now. For your baby shower.”

You slammed the pen down on your desk, “You know too?”

She leaned back, nodding smugly, “Bucky shouted it to the world when he and Steve got into a brawl.”

You dropped your head into your hands. “Jesus Christ.”

She shrugged, “No one else knows. Are you okay?”

You pursed your lips, looking down at your hands. “I think that’s the first time anyone has asked me that. I’m okay though. My relationships are in shambles and one of my boys wants me to get an abortion and the other is over the moon about these kids, but I’m fine.”

She raised an eyebrow, “Steve wants you to get an abortion?”

You nodded.

She pursed her lips, “I don’t know. He was so heartbroken after his fight with Bucky. I wouldn’t give up on him just yet.”

You fought back tears, you didn’t want to think about what that meant.

“Natasha,” you said hoarsely. “Please, do not give me hope. He made it so clear last night he wants no part in this. I don’t think he’ll be coming back anytime soon.”

Before she could say anything, a knock came at the door. Bucky popped his head in, “You ready babe?”

Natasha asked, “Ready for what?”

You wiped a tear from your face as you stood. “Tony hired me an OBGYN. She’s going to check up on the babies.”

Natasha smiled, “Keep me posted. Congrats.”

———

Steve’s fist made contact with a punching bag. And then again. And again.

Last night, after your talk, you left after he begged you to get an abortion. Without a word.

He didn’t need to hear you say it to know where that left the two of you.

You chose your children.

He couldn’t blame you for that. You’d make an excellent mother. The kids were lucky to have you.

It just sucked he couldn’t have you too.

It sucked that he and Bucky would never be as close again. That the three of you were giving up your life together, your love.

It all just sucked because he loved you too more than anything in the world.

But Peggy.

He was so ready for her life and her children, he swore it all off after she told him to leave. What was the point of it all if he couldn’t have it with her?

He punched the bag so hard he thought his hand was bleeding.

But what now?

Was he really giving up the best relationship he ever had because of the past?

Could he get over this resentment and be a father? For the three of you?

For Peggy any day. But he hadn’t allowed himself to think about his true feelings for you and Bucky.

He was vaguely aware of his phone ringing. It might not have been the first time it had gone off.

He punched the bag again and let it go to voicemail.

Fuck, the more he thought about it the more he could picture it all in his head. Since you told him you were pregnant, he’d shut it all out and hadn’t given it a second thought. But after last night...

His phone rang again.

He steadied the bag and picked up his phone. Natasha.

“Hey,” he answered.

“Where the hell have you been,” she demanded.

He frowned, “I’m at the gym. Wasn’t checking my phone.”

“Well, get your ass to the medbay,” she said urgently. “There’s something wrong with y/n. Now!”

He didn’t need to be told twice.

He didn’t think, he just ran. He sprinted through the halls, taking stairs two at a time until he got there.

———

“This is your first pregnancy?” Dr Laurence asked. She was a firm, young looking woman with brilliant red hair and amazing skin. You were immediately envious.

You nodded.

“Have you ever passed out before?”

“No.”

She turned to Bucky, “Do you or the other potential father have any children?”

He shook his head.

She finished taking notes and clicked her pen a few times, “I’m very, very curious about two things. How their genes are going to affect the pregnancy and the babies. And also, the paternity.”

You jumped right on that, “We don’t want to worry about the paternity. The other, um potential father, isn’t in the picture anymore.”

She nodded sternly, looking over her glasses at you, “I’d wager it had a far greater impact than you realize, dear. Their DNA from what I have seen is extremely different. It will impact the children differently. You’ll want to know this for their development.”

She made you feel so small, but you still said, “Then we’ll wait until they’re born.”

Bucky placed a hand on your shoulder in support. You sqeezed it tightly.

“Bruce also mentioned you asked about the possibility of the babies having different fathers.”

You opened your mouth to interject why you thought it was a possibility, but she went on, “It’s not an impossibility. As far as I know, it’s becoming more common but it is so understudied. Super soldier sperm may even have an impact on conception. I would love to study all that I can...”

“No.”Bucky growled. “You’re not looking at my sperm or studying my children.”

You placed a hand on his. You knew it was a touchy subject.

The doctor nodded solemnly, “Whatever you say. Let’s focus on keeping mom and babies healthy, shall we?”

You smiled and nodded. Bucky relaxed beside you.

“Wonderful,” she smiled. “Let’s start with an ultrasound.”

A few moments later, you were laid back, staring at the monitor. She pointed, “That is baby number one and that is baby number two.”

You smiled looking up at Bucky, who was shamelessly crying. “They’re starting to look like people, aren’t they?”

He laughed, kissing your forehead. “Thank you.”

You wiped a tear and looked back at the screen.

“Would you like to hear the heartbeat?” The doctor asked.

You nodded, gripping Bucky’s hand tighter.

The door burst open. Steve was standing there, his breathing erratic, looking panicked.

“What’s wrong?!” He shouted.

Bucky stepped in front of you, “Nothing. What the hell Steve?”

“I—” he frowned.

Two heartbeats filled the room. Steve looked past Bucky at the monitor and the strangest thing happened.

He started to cry.

Tags open

@just-the-hiddles @fading-mentality-bouquet @a--1--1--3 @broco8 @yougottalovefandoms @hailqueenconquer

[razorblade180]

Looking Back

[Lasting Embers au spoilers]

A constant in life is that life is constantly changing; a concept known to any huntsman that were worth their salt on the battlefield. As well as anybody who chose a dangerous life style. For Adam, it was the second constant in his life. The first was the stary void that dawned over him with its trillions of stars. It might be the only real perk of night watch. It was his turn to keep an eye out for any enemy that could’ve been following him and the rag tag fever dream of a team he found himself with. When Jacquelyn told him life is a story that goes the way each person decides, he never imagine somehow he had written a story that would lead him to helping members of team RWBY, their families, and his as well. Crazy for sure but hey, crazier had happened. This didn’t even make the list.

Yang approached him from behind with two mugs in her hand. The both of them were ordered to watch the forest clearing from the tree line. Ruby was dead set on making sure the two of them were in sync enough to fight together if things got hairy. Yang could think of a million other ways to spend the night but she wasn’t about to complain and handed him the coffee.

Yang:One coffee, black. If you’re going for something gross to keep you awake then I understand.

Adam:I told you black so you couldn’t slip anything in it.

Yang:....

Adam:Joking, I wasn’t serious. Mostly.

Yang:Your humor is more bitter than your drink. *sips* you should try to be more grounded.

Adam:That was terrible. We can’t both be bad at this or I might die from boredom alone.

Yang:Stabs to the chest didn’t end you. I doubt puns will. I’d be upset; could’ve gotten rid of you a long time ago if they did.

Adam:What can I say? I’m one lucky bastard.

Yang:I’ll say....

The blonde bruiser sat down with her head supported by her hands. Being here was awkward, too awkward. Neither of them really continued speaking. One watched the fields whil the other star gazed. Adam would sometime steal glances at Yang’s arm before going back to mapping out the sky. Yang let out a long and over the top sigh. At this point, talking to Adam couldn’t be as unbearable as saying nothing.

Yang:We should play a game.

Adam:What?

Yang:You heard me. It’ll pass the time. Besides, I’m positive Ruby will keep sticking us as partners if we don’t even pretend to get along.

Adam:Who’s pretending? I made my peace with my thoughts on you a long time ago. If I hadn’t then I wouldn’t have entertained the thought of looking over your daughter for over a decade.

Yang:Hmm is that right? Well, can’t say I’m not entirely over that hump.

Adam:This makes the fourth of fifth time you’ve told me that. You need new material. Freeing Jackie, me, when I showed up at your home, the train ride; I get it. Messaged received.

Yang:Tsk, no need to sound smug about it.

Adam:I’m not. I just don’t see a reason for you to state the obvious. You don’t forgive someone who shouldn’t be forgiven. What, are you upset because people like your sister don’t share the sentiment?

Yang:Why bring Ruby up and not Blake?

Adam:Like I said, stating the obvious. How are you two though? You’ve had plenty of time to properly bury that hatchet.

Yang:We’re just fine. Even before this whole cult shit.

Adam:Good. It’s already insane you two “killed” me and didn’t get together. I’d feel some type of way if you weren’t even friends. Talk about a let down.

Yang:You’re the reason- ugh, why the hell am I even trying to hold a proper conversation with you? I might as well pull my hair out...

Adam:....The hate game.

Yang:What?

Adam:It’s the game I wanna play. You and another person take turns talking about something you hate about the other.

Yang:That....sounds so stupid.

Adam:That’s the spirit, I’ll go first. You’re really loud all the time. Ever heard of a inside voice?

Yang:That’s rich coming from the screaming goat. All you ever did was scream Blake’s name.

Adam:All you ever did was scream in general. I hate how you always seem to butt into everything. It’s one thing to help a friend but you like act like you have a right to have an opinion on people you know by association.

Yang:I don’t need to know much about a terrorist to know you’re terrible.

Adam:I hate how you haven’t realized this is the first time you’re judging me by the crimes I committed for the first time, instead of claiming I was nothing but fake towards Blake and Ilia.

Yang:....

Adam:Everything is personal with you.

Yang:Says the hypocrite.

Adam:I won’t deny that. You feel better or you got more on your chest?

Yang:We’d be here for years if I said it all.

Adam:Then say the important ones I know you wanna say. “I hate that you’re still alive.” Or is it “I can’t stand your dismissive attitude?” The fact anybody like me was given a second-

Yang:I hate that you’ve spent more time with Yujin than me...

Adam:Oh....hmm. *lays back*

Yang:Got nothing smart to say, jackass?

Adam:Hey if you raised my kid with me barely around, I’d hate you too. Can’t fault you for that one.

Yang:It’s a twisted joke really. So many people to look over her from afar and it’s you. What was Sun thinking?

Adam:We were under staffed and things got ugly really fast. Decisions had to happen quickly. Plus the threat was clearly too unknown and dangerous to half ass anything. They killed two of you after all.

Yang:It would be wise to keep that incident out of your mouth. Ruby might tolerate you but that’ll change before I can even lift a finger.

Adam:Now you’re warning me? I thought your sister stomping me out would make your day.

Yang:Dude...shut up.

Adam:....What happened to your uncle and friend was terrible, sorry.

Yang:Ugh, even you saying that feels so wrong.

Adam: Please, thank you, and I’m sorry aren’t that hard. It’s not even new. The white fang wasn’t all snarls and chanting like you think. For awhile I pretty calm there.

Yang:The key word being “awhile.” You murdered your own.

Adam:Yep.

Yang*grits teeth* That’s all you say? People keep saying you’re different left and right and yet you don’t seem even a little regretfull. You’re sipping coffee and staring at the stars as if you hadn’t spent most of your life ruining other’s! What part of that sounds like a change of heart!?

Adam didn’t break his attention away from those stars. If he did, Adam would’ve no doubt seen how irritated Yang was. Her eyes burned red as she waited for an answer. Yang’s coffee was even boiling.

Yang:Well?

Adam:Regretting doesn’t bring them back, or the most heartfelt apologies. It just stirs anger. You wouldn’t feel better about your arm if I apologize.

Yang:So you choose to not even try.

Adam:No, I’ll just convince Jacquelyn to get the relic of creation whenever we eventually go to Atlas.

A perfectly good cup of coffee falls out of Yang’s hand. Did she hear that right? Adam just said he planned on creating an arm with a relic, for her!

Adam:What? It made me an eye. Making an arm is far less complicated than that. I’d say that would be better than any words I could say that you wouldn’t believe anyways.

Yang:....It’s your turn again.

Adam:Ah, let’s see. Well, if I were to be honest I guess...it really bothers me how similar you are to your daughter.

Yang:The hell does-

Adam:Let me finish before you break my ribs. That kid of yours pretty feisty and passionate about so many things. She bugged me to help train her until I finally said yes. Yujin gets frustrated easily and gets really sensitive about certain maternal subjects; yet it isn’t like she doesn’t want to avoid those conversations altogether. Seriously, your daughter is a little bit of a mess, but a fun mess. That bothers me because for a split second I can’t help but wonder that maybe if you and encountered each other on the same side in the beginning...maybe we’d be decent acquaintances or something.

Yang:D-Did you just say what I think you just said.

Adam:Who knows? I suck with words. I’m gonna rest for a little bit.

He turned his back to her to avoid eye contact. Yang couldn’t believe what she was witnessing. Was he embarrassed? Did he actually try some roundabout way of saying she was a good person? If only Blake was here for that. She would’ve flipped. Yang looked up the sky then back at the field; still nothing. When her guys went back to the stars it was curiosity.

Yang:Hey, were you staring a constellation in particular or something?

Adam:You can see Capricornus well from here. I joke all the time with Jael about that one since she’s into a shark faunus. Looking at it made me think about her is all.

Yang:Jael is your second daughter right?! I can’t believe I didn’t know that. I remember the first one for sure.

Adam:You were a little preoccupied to notice anything regarding Jael. Her and Yujin share a birthday.

Yang:No foolin!? Well how about that.

Adam:Yeah, life sure does like it’s jokes. I get a lot of flack if I’m not around for one’s birthday. Jael will get pouty and your daughter gets fussy. “You promised!” I’ve heard that too much.

Yang:Hehe, Jin might get that from me. It’s natural for your kid though. I know I wanted my dad around for mine. Even when I grew up and acted like I was too grown to really care, I wanted his birthday breakfast. Your kid looked like a real beauty.

Adam:Thanks, definitely got that from her mother.

Yang:Haha, don’t feel bad. Seeing Yujin with short hair made me think Jaune had another younger sister I just never met. His genes are way too strong.

Adam:Trust me, I’ve seen her with long hair and in the middle of a fight. I might’ve called her your name a few times.

Yang:Oof, that must’ve pissed her off.

Adam:No....she was actually surprised more than anything. Yujin never hated you Yang. Despite how she acted whenever your name was mentioned. I think she just wasn’t sure how to feel about you besides feeling lonely. I’m not any better with Jael. You wanna talk regrets, I don’t think I spent enough time with her the way I should’ve. Hopefully I’m wrong.

Yang:It’s very telling that you don’t regret your past but you regret something like that.

Adam:My past is terrible and dark, but it led me to my wife and kids. It feels wrong to regret it, so I’ll just accept it and carry on. Otherwise I don’t think I’ll ever have time to live in the present.

Yang:Geez, ever the drama queen. Though I can see a little bit of that view point. Still a spit in the face to people and yourself if you asked me.

Adam:The world thinks I’m dead and has made their mind up about me a long time ago. I go around taking down other terrorists and orginizations to keep them safe as a way to give back. I don’t owe the world anymore than that. I’m simply a remnant among Remnant. My regret is my kids have me as a dad. A kid should be able to talk about their parents and be proud.

Yang:Can’t argue with that. At least you stayed and are apart of their life. I can barely say that.

Adam:Helping save Remnant from another shadow war is a pretty strong excuse. Especially when the group has actually killed your family members. You’re just protecting them. Jaune and Yujin understand that.

Yang:....I hate that you’re not as terrible anymore. Reasonable you is too...

Adam:Reasonable?

Yang:I really hope I don’t have with this for another ten years.

Adam:I give it two, tops. You have a maiden with you this time and me. I’ll just hit you so you can get stronger and wreck shop.

Yang:Hit me and I hit you.

Adam:I’ll block, now we’re both wrecking shop.

Yang:Jacquelyn must have the patience of a saint to deal with you.

Adam:Yep, she’s pretty great. Saved my life, saved my soul. Couldn’t ask for more. You two would probably get along.

Yang:Nah, we worked together once. Wasn’t the best experience.

Adam:I was kidnapped and you were both pregnant. I’m not the smartest person but I’m positive that was a recipe for disaster. She thinks you’re cool, really respect your virtues. Sometimes it feels like she’s quoting you unfortunately.

Yang:Oh, glad I left a good impression. Maybe I can have her whisper regrets into your ear. Seriously, I regret things like lying to Ruby about tiny things yet you don’t really regret anything?

Adam:My regrets take place before the white fang. They remain in the work camp I escaped from. It’s funny, Yujin reminds me of my little sister, Eve.

Yang:Are you telling me that you, Adam, had a sister named Eve?

Adam:When you live in a place devoid of hope or faith, you cling to it in any way can. So my mother named us to help maintain hers. Probably had something to do with the loss of our father. Can’t say, never met him.

Yang:What was your mother’s name?

Adam:Don’t know. I called her mom and the gaurds called her by a serial number. Even that’s a little hazy. Anyways, sis got caught in an mining incident; mother was gunned down because I furious at a gaurd that stopped me from saving Eve.

Yang:Wow that’s umm, heavy stuff. Is that how you...*point to face*

Adam:Yeah, called it my punishment for disobeying. As far as regrets go, it would’ve been nice to be a son and brother; one that got to actually have proper meals.

Yang looked at Adam stare deeply into the void of space. It was strange. Yang has never seen Adam look mournful before. His eyes seemed to get more lost in thought by the second. A part of her felt....sorry for him.

Yang:I’m sure they’ve watched over you since day one. Who knows? Maybe they’re the real reason you’ve survived so long? If I know a thing or two about little sisters and mothers, they’ll never let you rest until you clean up your act, hehehe. Ruby can vouch for that. I bet both of them would be proud of your end result.

Adam:That’s funny. It kinda sounds like you just tried showing me compassion.

Yang:Pfft, I think you may have brain damage you didn’t know about.

Adam:Oh it’s possible. Neo and Mercury have put me through some shit.

Both of them laughed and continued to chat aimlessly, unaware that Ruby and Raven were watching from their own vantage point.

Raven:Well look at that? Maybe the gods haven’t abandoned us if people like those two can chat like that.

Ruby:Looks like our colorful team has gotten a little more stable. Now if only Weiss can get used to Nora’s snoring.

Raven:That’s seriously on your to-do list?

Ruby:I refuse to lead my team poorly this time around. I’ll do whatever I can whenever I can.

Raven:Qrow and Oscar would be proud to see you back on your feet, the right way this time.

Ruby:Can’t mourn forever. This is the mission to end all missions. I’m going full throttle...

[soopersara]

Day 6: Found

Read it on FFN | AO3

@zutaraweek

When Sokka comes up with an idea to get rid of Joo Dee, Katara finds herself in the Lower Ring of Ba Sing Se with a tea server she did not expect to meet.

Toph was right about Ba Sing Se. This place was really the worst. It wasn't that Katara didn't enjoy having a soft bed and ample food and an allowance from the royal treasury-that was all nice. The cleanliness and manners that Toph railed so hard against didn't bother Katara either. But Ba Sing Se had Joo Dee. And Joo Dee was terrible.

No matter where they went, Joo Dee managed to be two steps behind them all the way, smiling that creepy, unflappable smile, and scaring away anyone they tried to speak to. It was bad enough when they approached that shady-looking ostrich horse dealer and he slammed the door in their faces. That made sense. He acted like he had something to hide even before he saw Joo Dee. But when a pastry shop turned them away at the sight of Joo Dee's unnaturally wide smile, they had all had enough.

It was Sokka's idea to turn it into a game. There were four of them and only one of Joo Dee-logically, if they were to split up, Joo Dee could only ruin the day for one of them.

Since Sokka was the only nonbender, they agreed to give him one advantage—while Katara, Aang, and Toph could use their bending however they saw fit ("Without getting arrested, guys," Katara cautioned them. "You lose if Joo Dee catches you or if you get arrested"), only Sokka was allowed to wear Earth Kingdom clothes. If Katara or Aang could conjure fog to hide in, and Toph could choose to hide underground, it was only fair that Sokka be able to blend into a crowd.

So when they left the house the next morning, Sokka wearing a nondescript green tunic and Toph in one of Katara's spare Water Tribe dresses, Joo Dee looked surprised—or as close to surprised as she could possibly look without breaking her smile. They let themselves be escorted as far as the first busy street before Sokka gave Katara, then Aang a pointed look and nudged Toph with his elbow.

"Remember, the game ends at sunset," he whispered. "Ready? On three. One—" he glanced back to make sure Joo Dee wasn't too close. "—two, three. Run!"

Katara summoned a dense fog from the nearest fountain and broke into a sprint. She didn't really know where she was going—Sokka had spent most of last night plotting routes through the city and strategizing, but she preferred to improvise. So she ran west, smirking when she heard Joo Dee calling after them. Not yelling, though. Joo Dee wouldn't yell, that would be undignified and unsuited to the refined atmosphere of the Upper Ring.

She ran until she could no longer hear Joo Dee's voice, shrill with agitation, then ran further, until her lungs protested and her knees felt wobbly. Slowing to a walk, she turned down a street lined with fancy shops. A whole day without Joo Dee. This would be nice. Of course, it would be more fun if she weren't alone, but a day without that creepy smile and those wide, expressionless eyes constantly hovering over her shoulder was more than worth it.

Katara wandered into a clothing shop, then a shop that seemed to specialize in utterly impractical silk slippers. The kind that Toph and her mother wore in Gaoling—the kind that were too delicate to be worn outside. Katara wrinkled her nose. She didn't hate shopping, but she didn't have Sokka's enthusiasm for it. Especially when she was alone.

She meandered down one quiet street after another, farther and farther from the center of the Upper Ring. The Middle Ring felt more comfortable to her—it always had. But today, she had no interest in stopping. She hadn't had much chance to explore the Lower Ring, and today, armed with her waterskins and unhindered by Joo Dee, seemed like the perfect opportunity.

It was nearly midday when Katara realized she was hungry. The taverns in the Lower Ring looked a little shady for her tastes—if Sokka were here, he'd scold her for even considering going in alone. Truthfully, he might scold her for coming to the Lower Ring in the first place, but that didn't bother her. The drunken shouts from inside the taverns were another matter entirely. Luckily, there was a tea shop on the corner—a sleepy little place, not exactly quaint or charming, but it seemed quiet. Quiet suited her today.

She chose a table in the corner where she could look out the window and settled in.

"Welcome to the Pao Family Tea House," a weary-sounding voice said. "My name is Lee, and—"

Katara looked at the server and froze. And he froze. And for what seemed like a very long time, she stared into the very surprised golden eyes of Prince Zuko of the Fire Nation.

He recovered from the surprise first and spun toward the kitchen. "Uncle!"

Jaw hanging open, Katara turned slowly, eyes trailing after Zuko as he retreated behind the counter. Sure enough, there was his uncle, round and pleasant-faced as ever. And Zuko. Prince Zuko. In a teashop. In the Lower Ring of Ba Sing Se. In an apron. She wasn't sure what part of the image was strangest to her.

She pinched her arm, and it hurt. Not dreaming, then. Maybe this wasn't a dream, though. Maybe she had hit her head or something and it was a hallucination. Yeah. That made sense. Or at least more sense than—whatever this was.

Zuko was staring at her like she was a Foggy Swamp apparition as he whispered to his uncle in a voice that carried clear across the room. Katara snapped her gaping jaw shut. That was Zuko, all right. And spirits, he really needed to learn how to keep his voice down if he ever wanted to keep a secret. He was worse than Sokka, and that was saying a lot.

"What am I supposed to do?" Zuko hissed. His uncle mumbled something in reply. "No. No, Uncle. Absolutely not. No!" The old man glanced in Katara's direction and waggled his bushy gray eyebrows. "Uncle, I'm not serving her tea! For all we know, she's here to—" Zuko cut himself off and flushed a deep shade of red.

The old man clasped Zuko's shoulder and went off into a low, rumbling lecture that Katara couldn't understand from her seat. From time to time, Zuko glanced her direction, then turned back to his uncle, shamefaced. What was that about? It almost made Zuko seem—normal.

At last the lecture ended, and the old man patted Zuko's shoulder with an affectionate smile. Zuko made a show of throwing himself over the counter so his head thumped lightly against the wood and let out a prolonged groan. His uncle poked him in the side and offered an order pad. Zuko rolled his head to the side and glared up at his uncle for a second, then grumbled a string of wildly creative curses and snatched the order pad out of the old man's hand.

"Welcome to the Pao Family Tea House," Zuko began before he was even halfway to her table. The look on his face might have been an attempt at forcing a smile, but he just looked constipated. "My name is Lee—"

"You have to be kidding me," Katara interrupted.

Zuko's ears reddened. Or ear—it was difficult to see whether the scarred one changed color or not. "My name is Lee," he tried again, voice taut enough to crack. "And I will be your server today."

"What are you doing?"

His shoulders visibly tensed, and he held up his order pad as if it were a shield. "My job." He tried to smile and managed to look nauseated this time. Katara couldn't decide if that was better or worse than his constipated face. "Our special today is—"

She shook her head. "That's not what I meant. Why are you here?"

He threw his hands up. "I just am, okay?"

"And you work in a teashop?" Katara asked, still unable to fully wrap her mind around the concept.

"No, I just think the apron makes me look cool." He crossed his arms. "Are you going to order anything, or can I throw you out?"

Across the room, Zuko's uncle looked up. "Nephew," he warned.

Zuko stared up at the ceiling and gave a long sigh. "I mean," he said through clenched teeth, "What can I get for you today?"

A second of silence passed before Katara remembered why she had come in the first place. Lunch. Right. She was hungry. "Uh—do you have food here? Not just tea?"

"We have a small selection of fruit pastries." The reply came automatically, as if he'd repeated those exact words hundreds of times before. Zuko looked briefly startled by his own answer but settled back into an expression of annoyance.

"Okay." Fruit pastries weren't an ideal lunch, but it had to be better than braving the taverns. "I like everything but papaya."

"Papaya's all we have," Zuko snapped.

Okay, that response was far too quick. Katara glanced back toward Zuko's uncle.

"Nephew, I believe you misunderstood me earlier," the old man called across to them. "Papaya is the only thing we're out of."

Katara found herself smiling in triumph. "In that case, I would like a peach tart. Please. And a cup of tea."

Zuko grumbled, but he scribbled her order down—which probably wasn't necessary, considering the fact that the rest of the shop was empty—and stomped off to fetch her food.

He dropped the plate in front of her and thumped her teacup down. He folded his arms again. "Will there be anything else?"

Katara frowned up at him. "Actually, yes." She leaned forward, resting her elbows on the table. "I want to know the truth. What are you doing here?"

"I, uh—" He ran a hand through his hair. The motion made it stick out in several directions at once, but she had to admit that it still looked better than that stupid bald ponytail thing he used to have. "Excuse me, I have to get back to work."

"Take your time, Nephew," the old man said brightly as he bustled to clear the dishes and crumbs off the counter. "See? All cleaned up. And our busy time isn't for a few hours yet."

Zuko's mouth opened and closed a few times, and Katara smirked. "Sounds to me like you've got time to answer my question."

He glared at her.

"What are you doing in Ba Sing Se?"

"I—" He let out a puff of air. "I can't talk about it."

"Why?"

"Because—" He fidgeted with the edge of his apron. "People can't know where I'm from."

Her first impulse was to jump up and yell, Ha! I knew you were here to do something evil! But he didn't look like he was plotting anything. He just looked—embarrassed. And frustrated. And maybe a little bit frightened. And—it was stupid, but Katara wanted to hear what he had to say. She leaned back. "Well, there's nobody else here, and I already know where you're from. So your secret's out. I could go to the Dai Li right now and turn you in—"

His eyes widened, and the color drained from his face.

"Or," she continued, "I could stay here and eat my lunch while you tell me the truth."

He clenched his jaw and looked down. "What, so you can turn me in as soon as you leave?" Surprisingly, there wasn't any anger in his voice. Just weariness and defeat.

She shrugged. "Your chances are a lot better if you explain. Why are you here?"

Zuko rubbed the back of his neck. "My sister is insane. Next question."

"Are you just going to keep standing there? You're making me nervous."

With a sigh, Zuko glanced back at his uncle, but he pulled out the chair across from her and perched on the edge, ready to bolt out of his seat at any time. Okay, this really wasn't any better than his hovering. It should be impossible for a person to be that awkward.

"Happy now?" he asked.

Katara frowned. "Not really." She tore off a bit of the tart and popped it into her mouth. It tasted better than she'd expected. Actually, it was good. Really good. She tried not to let it show. "So—are you still looking for Aang?"

Zuko scrunched up his nose. "What's an Aang?"

She paused, mid-chew. "Seriously?"

"What? I've never heard of—" Realization washed over his face. "Oh. Is that—" He looked around and leaned forward to mouth the last few words, —the Avatar's name?

Katara flicked a few crumbs at him. "You have to be kidding."

"Hey!" He brushed the crumbs off of his apron, scowling. "Excuse me for having other things to worry about."

Rolling her eyes, Katara shook her head. "Yeah, well we had plenty to worry about too, and I still managed to learn your name." She took a sip of her tea. "Answer the question. Are you still hunting Aang or not?"

"I don't know." Zuko scratched at a stain on the tabletop. His good eyebrow crept downward, and his voice lowered. "I don't know if it even makes a difference anymore."

"What is that supposed to mean?" She crossed her arms. "It makes a difference to me if you're going to show up someday and try to kidnap my friend."

"No! I can't go home without the—without Aang, but I don't know if that would be enough anymore." He stared at the table. "My father sent my sister to bring me back, but I got the impression that she wasn't too concerned about keeping me in one piece for the trip. And she always does what my father expects of her, so—"

Katara almost shuddered at the memory of the fight back in that abandoned village. Azula was practically unstoppable. Maybe the fight would have gone differently if Katara's water supply hadn't been dangerously low, if they hadn't all been sleep-deprived, but she didn't savor the idea of meeting the princess again. "I'm glad you and your uncle are okay." Zuko looked up at her in surprise. "I mean—" she faltered. "He got hurt pretty badly, and I would have healed him. We never could have won that fight without the two of you. I would have helped if you'd let me."

His mouth hung open a fraction as he studied her, his golden eyes peering deep into hers, searching. For what, she wasn't certain. Katara felt her face heat and she hastily shoved a too-large piece of the tart into her mouth. She wasn't blushing. Zuko's lips parted a little wider—no. She wasn't looking at his mouth either. His awkwardness must just be contagious.

"Why are you here?" he asked after a pause. "You're travelling with—" He waved a hand, apparently unable to decide whether to say Aang or the Avatar. "Doesn't that basically put you in the Earth King's lap?"

"Gross." Katara wrinkled her nose.

"No, not like—" he sighed and rubbed his forehead with the heel of his hand. "Aren't you staying in the palace or something?"

She shook her head. "A house in the Upper Ring. We've been trying to get a meeting with the Earth King, but they won't let us anywhere near the palace." She stopped herself. She was dangerously close to revealing Sokka's plans for the eclipse. She shouldn't be telling Zuko things like this, but it was just too easy to keep talking.

"So why are you in the Lower Ring? I'm sure the teashops are a lot nicer where you live."

Okay, now she was blushing. "We were playing a game."

It was Zuko's turn to gape. "A game? What kind of game is it?"

"Ditch Joo Dee. It was my brother's idea."

He nodded slowly, looking as confused as ever. "And Joo Dee is?"

"The creepy lady who follows us around to make sure we don't cause trouble." Katara ran her finger around the rim of her teacup. "We split up so she couldn't ruin the day for all of us."

Zuko nodded as if he understood. He probably did, Katara realized. He was royalty. The Fire Nation might be different than Ba Sing Se, but if anyone there had to deal with overbearing glorified babysitters like Joo Dee, it was probably the crown prince. But before he could respond, his stomach growled loudly and he flushed, crossing his arms over his stomach.

"Impressive," Katara said, smiling.

Zuko scowled. "Shut up." He turned his face away, but not before she caught him glancing at her plate. He stared deliberately out the window and she saw him swallow.

"When was the last time you ate?" She didn't really mean to say it aloud, but now that she was paying attention, she couldn't help but notice how lean his face had become.

"This morning," he snapped.

From the corner of her eye, Katara saw the old man shake his head, and she raised an eyebrow at Zuko.

"Fine. Last night. I overslept this morning." His scowl remained fixed on his face and he turned his attention to the stain on the table again.

Or you deliberately slept in because there wasn't enough food for breakfast. She and Sokka had done the same a few times on their trip across the Earth Kingdom. They were older than Aang and Toph—it was their responsibility to take care of the younger kids. Most of the time, that meant the two of them doing most of the work to set up camp, Sokka hunting and fishing for their meals, and Katara doing the cooking and the washing. Toph rarely contributed more than her own earth tent, and Aang tried to help, he really did, but he had a tendency to wander off and play with Momo midway through chores. But there had been a few times when there was only enough rice left to feed Aang and only enough meat for Toph—it was just easier if she and Sokka pretended to sleep through breakfast so the other two could help themselves to the leftovers.

She frowned down at her plate. "You know—I think I'd like to try another kind of tart." She heard Zuko let out an irritated sigh. "Do you have anything with mango or cherry?"

He ran a hand down the side of his face as he stood. "Yes," he grumbled.

Katara smiled and Zuko's uncle gave her a curious look as she carefully cut off the untouched half of her peach tart. She tried to rearrange her expression into something like neutrality before Zuko returned with the second plate. She wasn't sure if she succeeded or not, but Zuko didn't seem to notice.

"Will that be all?" His voice was tight again and he refused to meet her eyes.

"Not quite." She sliced the second pastry in half and divided it so that she had the mostly-eaten half of the peach tart and half of the cherry tart on one plate and an untouched half of each on the other.

Zuko's brow furrowed. "What are you doing?"

Katara slid the second plate across the table and gave a crooked smile. "I said I wanted to try another kind. I didn't say I could eat all of this on my own."

A closed-off look came over his face. "Don't."

"Don't what?" She took a bite.

He ran a hand through his hair. "Don't—act like we're friends." He shifted uncomfortably.

Katara looked up, studying him. There was that defeat in his eyes again, though he was clearly trying to hide it. She rested her elbows on the table. "Why not?" The words came out almost as a challenge.

Zuko frowned, but his uncle cleared his throat. Zuko glanced back at the old man, then took a deep breath and eased back into the seat across from her.

It was strange, and for a while, Zuko sat stiff on the edge of his chair, answering in monosyllables. But one sarcastic remark made Katara smile, and Zuko relaxed a little. Talking to him was easy. And comfortable. And natural. And it was weird, but Zuko listened to her talk, unsmiling and gaze steady, and that felt nice too. Even if he didn't smile, even if that guarded look didn't quite disappear from this face, his eyes were warm.

She found herself wondering if she should ask again—Are you still chasing Aang? Can I trust you not to hurt him? Because she wanted to trust Zuko. It would be easy. If he had really given up on the idea, maybe she could stop acting like they were friends. Maybe they could be friends.

He said something that made her laugh—When did Zuko develop a sense of humor?—and a small smile flashed across his face. It was fleeting, gone as quickly as it had appeared, but for the instant it was there, his eyes lit up and Katara's stomach fluttered. Okay, so he had a nice smile. But Katara wasn't blushing, and a little stomach flip didn't mean anything. It was just—surprise, probably. Zuko smiled so seldom that a little surprise was only natural.

There was a commotion outside and they both started, turning toward the window.

A woman's voice, shrill and piercing, rang through the street, and Katara groaned. "That's Joo Dee." She dropped her face into her hands so that her elbows thumped on the table. "Sokka's never going to let me hear the end of this. I lost the game."

Zuko peered out through the blinds a second longer. "No, you didn't."

Katara raised her head enough to see him smile. A real, proper smile this time. Her stomach went wild with butterflies, and Zuko grabbed her by the hand.

"Come on," he whispered, pulling her out of her seat.

Trotting to keep up with his long stride, Katara hissed, "What are we doing?"

He led her back behind the counter, past his uncle, who shot them an amused smile, and pulled a serving cart out from under the counter. "Hiding." He pointed at the open space where the cart used to be.

Katara gave him a skeptical look, but then Joo Dee's voice came nearer and there were footsteps just outside the door. Taking a deep breath, she ducked under the counter and pulled her knees to her chest. Zuko crouched to make sure she was hidden, and the front door opened. Before Zuko could stand back up, his uncle shoved him out of sight and pushed the serving cart in front of their hiding place.

"Good afternoon my dear lady, and welcome to the Pao Family Tea House."

The loud greeting masked both Zuko's grunt and Katara's surprised squeak as his face collided with her shoulder. Zuko jerked back as quickly as possible, his head thumping against the counter in his haste. He winced, and Katara pressed a finger to her lips.

Sorry, he mouthed, face flushing scarlet. Bracing his hands against the sides of the little compartment, he pushed himself off to the side.

It's okay, she mouthed in reply and squeezed farther into the corner to make room for him.

"What may I do for you on this lovely day?" The old man clattered around over them, noisier than necessary, sounding pleased with himself. "We have an exquisite selection of teas from all regions of the Earth Kingdom—" He went on, chattering about a rare oolong that was rumored to be a favorite of the great King Bumi of Omashu.

Katara tried to ignore the heat gathering in her cheeks while Zuko's face hovered only inches away from hers. The space under the counter was scarcely large enough for both of them, and she could feel the gentle warmth radiating off him as he tried to twist himself around to sit. When he finally succeeded, she let out a small breath of relief. Their shoulders were wedged uncomfortably tight, and their hands were nearly touching, but at least now she could look away and pretend that her heart wasn't racing, that his piercing golden gaze wasn't making her stomach do strange fluttery things.

"Excuse me," Joo Dee interrupted. "I am sure that your shop is the pride of Ba Sing Se, but I have no time for tea. Four of the Earth King's young guests have gone missing. I believe that one of them may have come into your shop."

"Oh dear." The old man made a thoughtful noise.

"I believe either Lady Toph Beifong or Master Katara of the Water Tribe was seen heading this way," Joo Dee pressed.

"Mmmm." The old man stopped his clattering. "May I ask what these young ladies look like?"

Katara tensed. He couldn't. It would be bad enough losing the game, but being caught hiding under a teashop counter with Zuko would be downright humiliating, to say nothing of the danger for Zuko. She didn't want to see him caught. It felt strange, but she cared. If Katara was caught, it would be embarrassing. She would have to face teasing and questions from Sokka and the others, but Zuko—he could be arrested. Or worse. She started to squirm forward as Joo Dee described her and Toph.

Zuko's hand landed on her arm and he shook his head. Wait, he mouthed.

"I'm afraid I haven't seen any young ladies wearing blue today," the old man said. "Business has been very slow."

"Perhaps they changed their clothes?" Joo Dee demanded. There was a pause, then Joo Dee added, "If business has been slow, what is this?"

Oops. They'd left their plates at the table. Zuko's eyes widened, and Katara pressed her hands over her mouth.

"The scoundrel!" There was an edge of amusement in the old man's voice despite his apparent effort to sound serious. "I apologize, my good lady. It seems a customer left without paying."

"I shall alert the patrol on your behalf."

"Oh, don't trouble yourself," the old man answered jovially. "I know the young man well. Rest assured, I will have a very stern conversation with the boy's uncle."

[huphilpuffs]

fluttering

summary: There’s a moth in Dan’s house, so he Skypes Phil. 2009 fic.  word count: 2.5k rating: g warnings: bugs (and the killing of a bug if that makes you uncomfy) a/n: Big thanks to @tortitabby for the beta read and title!

ao3 link

Dan is never leaving his bedroom while home alone again. 

He just wanted food, just a little midnight snack—okay, fine, maybe more like midnight dinner—to eat while playing video games. That’s it. Just some reheated pizza to quell his hunger before going back to his room to play Mortal Kombat at full volume while no one’s here to tell him off for being up so late. 

But no, of course he can’t just enjoy a night to himself. Of course something had to go wrong.

Of course there’s a bloody moth planted right above his bedroom door.

His chest is tight, his hands shaking. Suddenly, his stomach really, really doesn’t want any pizza. 

The moth is big, and dark, and just sitting there and Dan can’t move. He definitely can’t walk under it. He turns on his heel and walks back into the kitchen. 

Maybe it’ll fly away, and Dan can go into his room and spend the rest of his night thinking about how there’s a moth somewhere in his house. It sounds better than having to actually deal with the thing.

---

Five minutes later, the moth is still there. 

It hasn’t moved. Not an inch. Not even a flick of it’s wing. Dan’s given up on sitting in the kitchen waiting for it to move. He’s settled on the floor with his knees tugged to his chest, legs jittering with anxiety, staring at the fucking moth from a distance. He keeps flicking his phone on and off, and his brief attempt to distract himself with YouTube failed miserably.

For a moment, he considers calling his mum, but she and his dad and Adrian are gone to visit family out of town. He almost calls his nan. She’d probably come, or at least tell him what to do, but she’s definitely asleep by now and a moth seems like a dumb reason to wake her.

It’s all dumb. Dan feels dumb.

He opens his text messages anyway.

Dan: u awake?

Phil: Yeah! What’s up?

Dan: come on skype plz

Phil must open Skype before he answers the text, because the little green bubble pops up next to his name. Dan hits the button to call him just as his phone vibrates in his hand. 

He stares at the moth as the ringtone plays. It still doesn’t move.

Phil’s smiling when he answers the call. “Hey!” he says. His brows furrow, smile pinching into a frown. “You okay? You look, uh, sweaty?”

“There’s a moth in my house,” he hisses, sneaking another glance up at it. 

Still no movement.

When he looks back at his computer, Phil’s covering his mouth with his hand to stifle a laugh.

---

“Okay, okay, I’m sorry, not funny.”

Dan rolls his eyes. “Very convincing.”

“It was just unexepected,” says Phil. “Tell me about this moth?”

“Uh.” Dan glares at it. “It’s big, looks black but that’s probably because it’s dark in here. It’s just sitting there.”

“Where?”

“Above my bedroom door.”

Phil nods. He looks like he’s actually taking this seriously now and Dan’s not sure if that makes it better or worse that he’s sitting on the stairs of his house in just his pants panicking because of a moth while Skyping his boyfriend. 

“Why can’t you just kill it?” says Phil. 

“It’s a moth.” 

A smile quirks at the corner of Phil’s mouth. “Right, right, how could I forget.”

God, Phil probably thinks this is so stupid. Dan should have called his nan after all. Then this just would have ended up one of those terrible stories his aunts laugh about at family events. It’s probably better than embarrassing himself in front of Phil. He’s already always embarrassed in front of his family anyway. 

Dan groans, pressing his face between his knees. “This is stupid.”

“Hey, no it’s not,” says Phil. He’s frowning again when Dan looks up. He looks actually worried. “Do you want to kill it or just get rid of it?”

He looks at the moth again. It’s still sitting there, clearly not giving a shit about all the trouble it’s causing Dan. 

Hugging his knees even tighter to his chest, he huffs. “Whatever gets rid of it faster.”

Phil nods, just once. “Okay,” he says, “so here’s what you’re gonna do.”

---

“I hate you,” Dan announces on his second trip up the stairs. “You’re making me do exercise.”

“Hey!” says Phil. “You’re the one who wanted help getting rid of your little moth problem.”

Dan sighs. Phil’s voice is but a faint whisper now as he makes his third trek back downstairs to find another flashlight and fetch the step stool from the closet, just in case. It’s heavy over his shoulder and he’s huffing by the time he gets it all the way up the stairs and he can hear Phil’s faint laughter coming from his computer.

“I think you’re just doing this to make me look ridiculous.”

He sits back down on the top step, surrounded by all the supplies Phil had him go get. There’s a fly swatter and kitchen roll, his mum’s oven mitts and two flashlights and the stepping stool, all laid out around him in a circle. Three trips up and down the stairs and the moth’s still just sitting there. 

It probably doing it just to spite Dan now.

“I would do no such thing,” says Phil, even though he’s smiling. “I love you and would never take advantage of your moth phobia for the sake of my own amusement.”

Dan glares. “It’s not a phobia.”

Phil’s brows raise, and Dan realizes it probably doesn’t sound very convincing, given that he’s surrounded by supplies to get rid of the stupid thing. It’s been well over half an hour since he first came down to get food and Dan’s still sitting on the floor trying to build up the nerve to go near the stupid thing.

“Fine, whatever,” he says. “What do I do next?”

“You’re not gonna like it,” says Phil.

“Oh no.”

The corner of Phil’s mouth lifts almost sympathetically. “You’re gonna need to set up a flashlight to lure the moth somewhere else.”

Dan frowns. “Fuck.”

---

It takes another five minutes for Dan to muster the courage to walk by the moth.

He grabs the smaller of the two flashlights and fidgets with it for a long moment. Then he sets up his laptop so Phil can see down the upstairs corridor, just in case the moth tries to attack Dan for invading it’s territory or something. Not that it’s very likely to do that, Dan supposes.

Still, it makes him feel better to know Phil’s looking out for him. 

“I just need to set up the flashlight and then come back, right?”

“Yup,” says Phil. “Google says moths like light.”

“That’s probably why the bloody thing ended up by my room,” says Dan. He looks back down the hallway. The bathroom’s just one door down and then maybe the moth will come towards the ground and he can get rid of the stupid thing. “Now?”

“When you’re ready,” says Phil. 

Dan nods. He sucks in a deep breath and lets it out slowly. He can do this. It’s just an insect. And it hasn’t even moved the entire time it’s been there. It won’t move now. Probably.

He takes another breath, and then runs past the moth like a kid, darting into the bathroom. His hands are shaking again as he sets up the flashlight so it beams through the doorway and paints a bright circle on the hallway wall. The moth might land there, he realizes, but it’s better than having it planted right above his bedroom door.

The moth doesn’t move towards the flashlight. Dan’s almost glad. That would require it moving towards him right now, too.

He still needs to walk by it again. It takes him another few moments, which he spends regulating his breathing and staring pointedly at the moth, before he musters the courage to rush back. 

Phil’s smiling when Dan drops back onto the ground in front of his laptop. 

“What?” asks Dan. “I didn’t Skype you to be your entertainment for the night, you know.”

“I know,” says Phil. “It’s just that you’re really cute.”

Oh. Well, that makes Dan’s chest go a little warm, even though his heart is still racing and his breathing coming a tad too shallow. He hugs his knees to his chest again, pressing his face between them to keep from smiling because he probably should be annoyed that Phil’s so entertained by the whole situation. 

“I’m not cute,” says Dan.“I’m a very manly man.”

Phil giggles. “Right, of course. My manly boyfriend.”

“Uh huh.” Dan peaks up to find Phil staring at him the same way he does during late, sappy nights. It’s a better distraction than any corner of YouTube could ever be. He rests his chin against his knees, letting himself smile back. “How was your day?”

Phil shrugs. “Boring,” he says. “Better now that I get to talk to you.”

Dan’s chest goes all fluttery and warm. “Sorry I’m a mess today.”

“Doesn’t matter,” says Phil, so impossibly sincere. “I still get to talk to you.”

His eyes look so blue, even through shitty Skype quality, and his smile so sweet, and for a moment Dan almost considers picking up his laptop, rushing into his room, and spending the rest of his night like this. The moth will probably disappear by morning. Except part of him knows the lingering anxiety would keep him from fully enjoying Phil’s company.

He always wants to fully enjoy every part of Phil.

“How are you feeling now?” 

Dan hums. “Better,” he says. “Is it weird that you make me feel safe even, like, when you’re not actually here.”

“Not weird,” says Phil. He sounds like he means it. “Wish I could be there to make you feel safe in person.”

Dan pouts. It’s probably pitiful but it makes Phil smile, and that’s all that really matters.

---

“It still hasn’t moved.”

It’s been way too many minutes since Dan set the flashlight up in his bathroom. His back is starting to ache from sitting hunched over on the hard floor for so long. The anxiety is starting to come back, and not even Phil telling him about the video concept he’s been working on can make it fully go away again.

The moth is still planted, perfectly still, just above Dan’s bedroom door.

Phil frowns. “I think you’re moth is defective,” he says.

Dan’s insides seem to shudder. “I don’t know if that makes it better or worse.”

“I think it means you need to kill it there,” says Phil.

Dan swallows. “Definitely worse.”

--- 

Per Phil’s instructions, he closes his bedroom door and sets the step stool up in front of it so that he knows for sure he can reach it. He holds the fly swatter in one hand and slips an oven mitt onto the other so he has double the weapons. The kitchen roll stays on the floor so he can clean up any mess later.

The flashlight from the bathroom lights up the hallway enough for Dan to see the faint pale eyes painted on the moth’s wings.

It almost makes him forget how to breathe.

“I don’t want to do it,” he whines.

Phil huffs a quiet laugh. Dan’s too occupied with the moth to be bothered by it. “Would you rather it stay there?”

“Fuck no.”

“The you have to kill it,” says Phil. 

Dan scowls. “That’s not helpful,” he says, and starts pacing the hallway.

---

When he actually does gather the courage to do it, it happens fast.

Dan’s legs shake as he tries to climb the step stool. His oven gloved hand is useless to help him stay steady. Phil’s silent on the other end of the Skype call, but Dan knows he’s watching. 

It’s what makes him take the last step up the stool, raise his hand, and slap the fly swatter against the wall.

The plastic is too flimsy, though.

The moth panics. And flies right at Dan’s face.

“Fuck!” he shouts. His balance on the step stool teeters and, he vaguely hears Phil yell “Be careful!” from his laptop.

Dan’s too busy swatting in front of his face too listen. The fly swatter has fallen from his hand. The moth flies in circles around his head as he stumbles off the step stool, just about collapses against the opposite wall.

He watches, heart racing and lungs definitely not working, as the moth flutters over to the circle of light the flashlight is still painting across the hallway wall.

“Oh, so now you cooperate?” he hisses. Phil’s responding laugh sounds through the hall. “Fuck you.”

He walks over to it before the adrenaline can die down. His legs kinda feel like they’re about to collapse under him, and his hand is definitely not steady enough to wield a fly swatter, so he presses the oven glove against the wall and mentally vows to clean it tomorrow before his mum gets home.

When he pulls his hand away again, the moth is dead.

From his computer, Phil’s cheering loudly. Dan’s whole body heaves on a sigh. 

---

Dan locks himself in his room afterwards.

He’s collected a pile of snacks that should last him until the sun has risen and all moths have preferably disappeared. He’s used the bathroom just to make sure he wouldn’t have to leave again. He’s scooped up his laptop, still lit up with Phil’s face, and set it down in the middle of his bed.

Phil laughs at him as Dan settles down against his pillow, tugging his duvet tight around his shoulders because it feels safer that way.

“What are you gonna do now?” he asks.

Dan shrugs. It’s barely visible, between the thick fabric of his blanket and the few pixels of his webcam. “Was gonna play video games.”

Phil pouts. He’s too adorable like that. It makes Dan wish he was back in Manchester so he could kiss him.

“But I’d much rather talk to you,” says Dan. “My knight in shining armor, or whatever.”

That brings Phil’s smile back. It doesn’t make Dan want to kiss him any less.

“But I couldn’t even kill the moth for you!”

“No, but you did deal with me being a total wimp for, like, way too long to be reasonable,” he says. “That’s, like, totally noble behaviour.”

He draws the duvet tighter around him, snuggling deeper into it as though that will convince him he’s wrapped in Phil’s arms instead. Now that the rush of the moth fight has died down, his heart slowed and mind gone a little hazy around the edges, it’s where he really wants to be.

Then again, it’s pretty much always where he wants to be.

“Hey, Phil?”

“Yeah?”

“When we live together one day, you’re in charge of getting rid of all the moths, okay?”

Dan’s stomach twists, like it always does when he makes statements about their future, but Phil’s response is a smile that lights up his whole face, crinkling the corners of his eyes.

“Okay.”