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hibiscustea9 · 3 years

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10,000 views on “Fire Walk with Me”!

YOU GUYS. Late last night, “Fire Walk with Me” hit 10,000 views. I am beyond blown away by this. Nothing I have ever written has come anywhere close to the reception this story has gotten. To celebrate, I’m going to make the sort of post I don’t usually make and share one of my headcanons for each of the Stardew Valley villagers (excepting the few who don’t have any real impact on the story, like Gil and the Ginger Island villagers). Read on below the jump to see these (some of which have been shared already in “Fire Walk with Me”) and thank you, thank you for all of your support and reading this story. It’s made me so very happy.

Abigail secretly loves disco music. She hates the aesthetic and clothing of the era, but she will rock out to any of the great disco bands or divas when in her room and with her earbuds in. She would sooner die than have Sam and Sebastian find out about this.

Alex had offers to attend several universities on a full ride scholarship to play gridball, but turned them down out of fear of failing out of school. After high school, he was diagnosed as dyslexic. His teachers were encouraged to just pass him through without making him complete the work, which left him deeply insecure. He now has plans to go to trade school, which he feels might be his ticket out of Pelican Town.

Caroline is the wizard’s daughter, and a lay green witch. Her father was a sailor who was lost at sea and Rasmodius comforted her mother (which is the regret Rasmodius has that broke up his marriage). Caroline’s hair is naturally green. She is not aware of her magic, which manifests mostly as being able to grow any plants she wishes.

Clint left Pelican Town to go to college, only to have to come back when his father died to take care of his mother. He was a voice major and has a lovely singing voice, though he’s often too shy to show it off these days.

Demetrius is a skilled teacher and used to adjunct biology classes at Grampleton Community College to help support his family when Robin was getting her carpentry business off the ground. While he enjoyed teaching, the commute and long hours burnt him out after a year and he hasn’t felt the urge to teach since.

The Dwarf is a huge movie buff, but even more than the films, she enjoys turning around while sitting in the front row to look at the faces of the people watching the films.

Elliott is not a citizen of Ferngill but a foreign national. His posh accent and vocabulary rubbed some townsfolk the wrong way when he moved to Pelican Town. He managed to get on the good side of those same townsfolk when he accidentally knocked his bait bucket all over himself at his first Festival of Ice but continued fishing through it, coming in a respectable second to Willy that year.

Emily genuinely believes in the healing power of crystals and positive thinking, though she also has great respect for traditional medicine. She often asks Harvey medical questions when he’s at the bar. For his part, Harvey truly enjoys being able to talk about his discipline with anyone else, even a crunchy granola type like Emily.

Evelyn stopped believing in Yoba after her daughter was diagnosed with cancer and died young, leaving Alex in her care. She has never let on, given how George makes a point of attending weekly services. Seeing how much Clara suffered, first in an abusive marriage and then going through the failed treatment for her cancer, left Evelyn unable to believe in an all-powerful deity. Instead, she aims to spread as much kindness as she can, seeking salvation in other people instead of worship of Yoba.

George started watching so much television when Alex came to live with him and Evelyn. He didn’t like TV much before then, but got in the habit of letting Alex stay up late and watch reruns with him. While he claims to enjoy westerns the most, he has a not-so-secret love for classic game show reruns. The way the women dress reminds him of Evelyn when she was young, though he thinks none of them are quite as pretty as Evelyn.

Gus used to run a successful restaurant in the Zuzu City suburbs and is a classically-trained chef. The stress of running the restaurant and being in charge of both the front and back of the house took a toll on his health and his doctors recommended he step back and find something less strenuous to do. With his proceeds from selling the restaurant, he built the Stardrop Saloon and now is much happier with his life.

Gunther is a local son of Pelican Town who moved away to attend grad school in library science. He had a job in Zuzu City but moved back when he learned of the theft of the collection. He secretly resents returning to Pelican Town, which he was eager to leave, but feels it is his duty to stay and ensure the library is taken care of.

Haley’s ringtone on her phone is the National Geographic theme. When she was young, her parents took her and Emily all over the world and she grew fascinated with other cultures and other places. She has planned all the trips she wants to take. As much as she and Emily bicker, Emily is her favorite travel companion.

Harvey and his family were very poor when he was growing up. When he was fourteen, his sister contracted scarlet fever and they were unable to afford a doctor’s visit. A local doctor from a clinic came by and left medicine at her own expense. This led Harvey to pursue medicine as a career; he could make much more money in Grampleton or Zuzu City, but he stays on in Pelican Town because they really need a doctor.

Jas helped Shane with his experiments in breeding the chickens. She has a natural head for science and once she got hold of Shane’s books, she plotted out how to look for recessive genes that would allow for chickens to be bred and emerge with blue feathers. She and Shane have a gentlemen’s agreement to not tell Marnie.

Jodi worked as a travel agent before she married Kent. She always envisioned the trips they would take as soon as they had the money, and then when Sam was grown, and then when Vincent was grown. She sometimes stays up late on the computer, looking at flight plans and planning the most affordable trips that would allow her to travel and see the places she most wants to see in the world.

Kent found comfort in another soldier when they were in the Gotoro prison camp. Though it became physical, it was more about finding something to hold onto than about the sex. His guilt over this relationship kept him distant from Jodi and his sons when he first returned. After confessing his indiscretion to Jodi, they attended relationship counseling. She has forgiven him, but he has yet to forgive himself.

Krobus is technically a liquid.

Leah earned an M.F.A. from Zuzu State, where she met and became friends with Elliott. Prior to attending her program, she interned as an apprentice carpenter in Grampleton. It was these same contacts who told her about Pelican Town and Robin, who let Leah stay at her home while she looked for a house to rent in town. Leah not so secretly has a crush of admiration on Robin.

Lewis, before becoming mayor of Pelican Town, owned a leatherworking business. He misses working with his hands, which is one of the reasons why he always visits the shopkeepers and is insistent on there being booths at the Stardew Valley Fair for the artisans in town to show off their wares.

Linus used to live in Pelican Town. He has a living relative in town. [REMAINDER REDACTED: SPOILERS FOR UPCOMING CHAPTERS OF “FIRE WALK WITH ME”]

Marlon saved George’s life the day of the mine cave-in. He was the only one willing to enter the caves and seek out the last missing miner. It was in the process of doing so that a falling rock blinded him in one eye. Despite his injury, Marlon managed to pull George to safety up through the mine shafts. Though his lost eye made him unable to be an active member of the Adventurer’s Guild, Marlon does not regret anything and would absolutely do it again.

Marnie wanted to be a veterinarian. She did very well in college, earning a degree in animal sciences from Zuzu State, and was on the verge of leaving Pelican Town permanently to pursue vet school when she interned at a vet’s office in Grampleton for a summer. She was so distraught the first time she had to assist with putting a dog to sleep that she gave up on the career and decided to open her ranch. She makes it a point to be present any time an animal has to be put to sleep to give it comfort, even though it wrecks her emotionally.

Maru got into science after Sebastian was completely uninterested in a chemistry set he got one year for the Feast of the Winter Star. She is still passionate about chemistry, despite her other interests in biology and robotics. She was briefly the most popular kid in town, despite being younger than most of the other young adults, when she learned how to make ice cream using ingredients found in any kitchen.

Morris was a child actor who had a small role in Junimo Forest, a nearly-forgotten children’s movie from more than forty years ago. He owns six of the known twenty surviving copies of the film.

Mr. Qi took Sandy on as his ward after her parents, who worked for him, died suddenly. He considers Sandy to be his own daughter and always looks out for her. It’s why the Oasis is still in business despite barely getting any customers.

Pam and Penny used to live above the library. Pam’s husband and Penny’s father was the former curator, who made off with the entire collection on a day when Pam took Penny to an academic competition her senior year of high school. The trailer was the only thing they could afford to move into. This was when Pam started drinking so heavily and Penny started longing so much to live in a house of her own.

Pierre holds a degree in economics that he wanted to use to help boost his family’s business. His secret stash is stock options that he has been investing in since taking over Pierre’s General Store from his father. Neither Caroline nor Abigail knows about this money that Pierre is sitting on.

(I am not the biggest fan of Pierre, in case you can’t guess.)

Rasmodius only built his tower after his daughter, Caroline, was born. He has looked over Caroline and her family ever since. Though his lifespan will last far beyond Caroline’s, he plans to watch over Abigail after she is gone, as well as any children Abigail has, or their descendants. His greatest regret is not being present in Caroline’s life as she was growing up.

Robin wanted to be a ballroom dancer, but at 5′11 was far too tall to actually enter the ballroom circuit. She met Demetrius at amateur ballroom dancing lessons and still knows how to perform any ballroom or Latin dances she learned. Her favorite dance is the tango because of the crisp precision required. After she retires, she and Demetrius have a plan to travel and dance the tango in all of the countries where it is taught.

Sam, despite a love of pranks, only ever really got in trouble once while in high school. He and Sebastian cut class and went to a local park, where Sam skateboarded and Sebastian smoked. A missed trick made Sam get so scraped up he had road rash for a month. After he got home, Jodi read him the riot act for once and grounded him from skateboarding until school was out. That was when Sam got into guitar and started thinking seriously about a career in music.

Sandy met Emily at a holistic retreat. She used to work for Mr. Qi, selling snake oil (literally - his iridium milk sells for a huge amount to those in the know), but was so energized by her encounter and conversation with Emily that she decided to go into running her own store.

Sebastian’s favorite adult in town (other than his mom) is Marnie, who recognizes in him a kindred spirit. Marnie taught Sebastian how to catch frogs when he was young and he still occasionally seeks her out to talk to and ask advice from. He vehemently dislikes Lewis because of his refusal to acknowledge his relationship with Marnie, and wants to see Marnie in a relationship with someone who will treat her right.

Shane was on track to be a major gridball star, and was the hope of Stardew Valley High, before getting in a car accident senior year. He almost lost a leg and had to spend six months relearning how to walk. He began drinking heavily afterward to cope with the constant physical pain. Marnie reached out to friends of his in Zuzu City, who had him come live with them and dry out. He remained sober until three months after he moved back to Pelican Town with Jas, his goddaughter. He started drinking again after working at JojaMart, much to Marnie’s dismay.

Vincent changes what he wants to be when he grows up on a weekly basis. Past desired jobs have included soldier (like his dad), musician (like his brother), teacher (like Miss Penny, but something fun like art, not yucky like spelling), game show host, Flower Queen, surfer, and astronaut. Jodi amuses herself by imagining what her son will wear to work on the weeks where he insists he’s going to be some combination of the above.

Willy is a veteran of the Ferngill Coast Guard. He is from the Fern Islands but vowed never to return after some of his siblings disputed his father’s will and caused a massive feud. He joined the Coast Guard as a way to stay on the water and get away from the islands. He was honorably discharged after suffering an injury on a rescue mission and decided to settle in the most peaceful seaside town in Ferngill that he could find, which led him to Pelican Town.

Once again, thank you all so, so, so much for reading “Fire Walk with Me”! I hope you enjoyed these headcanons and that they give you some insight into some of the way I’ve written characters in the story.

#stardew valley #headcanons

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hogwartsfirebolt · 5 years

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Oooh, if you’re still taking those “I love you” prompts, can I please have drarry + 15? Thank you! ❤️

Thank you for the prompt ❤️

The way you said “I love you” 15: Loud, so everyone can hear.

They fell in love on a Wednesday night like any other, almost without noticing.

It happened during what, years later, they would call “the spring that lasted a full year”. Harry had finally made his way back to England after half a decade of travelling, and they found themselves having dinner with what used to be their individual friend groups and had somehow, at some point, become a unit.

More often than either of them would like to admit, in those weekly dinner nights at whoever’s house had been offered the week before, they would end up in secluded corners, just talking, would have denied it if it weren’t for the fact that they were caught at it a handful of times — Theo walking into the kitchen where they were huddled together, whispering even though they were alone; Ron opening the bathroom door without knocking that time Draco cried into Harry’s shoulder; Hermione and Pansy stumbling into the cellar, where Harry and Draco sat on the floor, sharing a wine bottle, laughing and drinking themselves silly.

They were caught, and teased, and each time it happened Harry would give him a conspiratorial smile so bright Draco almost had to step back from it, but instead bore it stoically, with a flush to the tips of his ears.

The first time it happened, the last remnants of winter still clung to the night. Each time, it would let up a fraction, until buds sprung up in the middle of Draco’s belly, bloomed every time he learned something new about Harry, and then it was spring, it was always spring.

And so, they fell in love on a Wednesday night like any other, at Hermione and Ron’s minuscule flat in London, sitting side by side with the tips of their pinky fingers brushing underneath the dinner table.

They were the last ones to leave, that night, and when they did, the air felt thick with new beginnings and Draco’s side tingled where Harry pressed against it as they walked down the street. It was not raining, the first dry night they had in a while, but still their shoulders were covered in thin raincoats and their heads bent low. Draco knew something was happening, could feel it in the way his heart seemed to be fighting its way out of his chest, but he couldn’t have said what it was.

They fell in love quietly, not knowing it was love. The first kiss, when it happened, surprised them both.

It was me, Harry would say, years later, I kissed you first.

No, Draco would argue, I leaned in, it was me, it was me.

Truth be told, neither of them could tell — all they knew was Harry walked Draco home that night and in the space of a second, in between one moment and the next, their noses were brushing and their lips touching.

They were in love. It was spring.

Nobody could have predicted it, Draco least of all, but if he’d ever dared imagine it in his wildest dreams, he wouldn’t have pictured it the way it truly was. He would have thought, we’ve gone through so much, it will be intense and difficult. It wasn’t. Falling in love with Harry was the gentlest thing he’d ever experienced, easy as breathing, as if it had always been a part of him, a seed waiting to be nurtured and grow.

It took them nine long months to get to that kiss, summer and autumn and winter passed, but once they got there, they moved quick and without hesitation, went from kissing to touching to sleeping in each other’s beds to moving in together in the space of one spring.

They were sure their friends would be shocked, even prepared a speech to deliver at the next gathering, flashcards with several bullet points that ended up being useless, for Draco blurted it out as soon as they stepped into Theo’s, and everyone laughed and laughed and money was passed around to a chorus of About time! Took you both long enough!

It was love — the true kind — even if Harry tiptoed around the word, even if Draco was slightly terrified whenever he stopped to think about how much it meant to him and how destroyed he would be if anything were to touch it.

Fear made him coarse, sometimes. It would make him act up, yell whenever Harry did something reckless because he thought it would be fun and got himself hurt — too often, way too often — would make him break down and cry in the hallway of the hospital after Harry had crashed his bike, or fallen from a great height, or stunned himself while trying to perfect his charmwork.

Made him pack his bags and leave their flat one rainy morning, and that, too, felt like a message. Spring was over. It was time for summer rain.

He didn’t want to leave, but if he was going to lose Harry, he would lose him in a way he could control. I can’t see you die, he scribbled in his goodbye note, because he wasn’t strong enough to say it to Harry’s face, I can’t spend my days waiting for the hospital to call and tell me something’s happened to you, to say you didn’t make it this time.

They hadn’t said the words, so he didn’t write them. It had been six months, the happiest of his life, the scariest of his life, and he loved Harry but hadn’t said it yet and wouldn’t get to, because he was leaving. It was for the best.

Avoiding Harry proved almost more difficult than forgetting him. He seemed to be everywhere Draco looked for months after their break up.

Coincidence. I wasn’t following you, Harry would say, years later.

You were so following me.

I wasn’t, but if I had been, you should be grateful because otherwise you’d never have talked to me again and you know it.

If Harry wasn’t following him, it certainly seemed like it. Draco ended up walking out of dozens of parties and avoiding parts of London he’d previously frequented because he couldn’t stop running into his ex, who he hadn’t spoken to once after breaking up and whose letters he burned every morning.

That was not a sustainable way of life, of course, and it had Draco slightly unhinged, which was how, years later, he’d excuse that night’s actions.

Spring was around the corner again, and the numerous Christmas parties held by their friend group had begun. He couldn’t recall the exact series of events, but he remembered it happened (more or less) as follows:

They were at Blaise’s, there was music, the newest Weird Sisters’ album-

It definitely wasn’t the Weird Sisters, Harry would say, years later.

It was the Weird Sisters, Draco would argue.

So, the Weird Sisters played and Blaise had invited the entirety of London, it seemed, and Draco felt alone and miserable and couldn’t stop thinking about how, the year before, Harry and him had snuck out of the party and climbed to the roof of the house to stargaze.

He could see Harry across the room, looting the snack table, and it still hurt, not being able to walk up to him and hold his hand and knowing the only reason he couldn’t was his own damn pride.

What happened after was crazy, to say the least. Draco couldn’t remember what had driven him to make the decision, all he knew was that he had walked to the snack table, held the tablecloth in both fists and pulled, hard.

Definitely unhinged, Harry would say, years later, laughing so hard there were tears in his eyes. But he hadn’t laughed, when it happened, instead he stared at Draco, wide eyed as every plate crashed on the floor and Draco exploded in front of him.

You are infuriating, Draco had said, then, sounding insane. I can’t stand the sight of you, you drive me crazy, what are you doing here? Why have you been following me? I can’t do this, I hate you, I hate this food, I don’t want to see you ever again.

You said a few more things, Harry would say, years later, but he wouldn’t push because he knew Draco would be embarrassed about that episode for the rest of his life.

When it happened, though, the only thing Harry had said was, Are you done?

And it infuriated Draco so deeply that he turned around and made for the door through the crowd, trembling, on the verge of crying.

But the music stopped, just then.

It definitely wasn’t the Weird Sisters.

Oh, shut up.

The music stopped, and Draco turned around and found Harry standing on top of the table Draco had just ruined, looking so upset and beautiful and hurt that Draco couldn’t leave the room after all.

Don’t go, Harry had said, then, breathed it out. Don’t go, I —.

It wasn’t just the music. The room had gone quiet, everyone staring at the two boys making a scene, but Draco almost wasn’t aware of them, felt them fade out as his entire being focused on Harry, the face he knew so well, and, for once, listened.

It’s been hell, why haven’t you answered any of my letters? I — And then he said it, loud, so everyone could hear. I love you. I loved you and I love you and I never wanted to hurt you, please don’t leave, please don’t go, please —

I didn’t beg that much, Harry would say, years later.

You did, Draco, Ron, Hermione, Theo, Pansy and Blaise would remind him, until he sighed and admitted Right, I did, I did beg very much.

But it was alright, in the end. Because after a very long winter came spring and with it, a love that had been put on hold bloomed again, brighter and stronger than ever before.

And then we got married, Harry would say, years later. And Draco would smile.

#prompt #mine #drarry #drarry fic #harry potter #Draco Malfoy #amelior8or #ilyprompts #mywriting

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mercyprevaild-a · 3 years

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Stretching from Second Street to Seventh, there is a charming neighborhood that has old roots, with some parts dating back to the early 1900s. History seems to bleed out of every crack and crevice of the rowhomes, apartments and the shop fronts of its own little market place. There's bit and pieces scattered about; plaques built into brickwork that mark the erection of significant buildings and statues in the small park to honor important local figures from the past. By just scratching the surface, all anyone might see is the charm of age, a place captured in time. But dig a little deeper and one can easily find that the true past of these streets are much darker than the residency lets on.

Rick is intimately familiar with the history of this place, all the intricate little secrets that are well kept and private to the families that have lived here for decades upon decades. When dealing with the criminal world, one learns quickly that it's best to have some knowledge of who you're dealing with and in Rick's case, knowing exactly whose blood might end up on his hands is sometimes crucial to his own survival.

He didn't used to be a regular visitor to the main row, as it's mostly a quiet place now and has been for some time. The families with their criminal ties, at least those who are still relevant here, are not the sort to make a lot of commotion that might draw the public eye. It's bad for business, Rick can respect that. But as of a few months ago, during a low risk intel job, he scored himself an invitation to a little up and coming establishment.

On the corner of Main and Fifth is a quaint French cafe that's been in business for nearly thirty years under the same family name. The coffee there is expensive, imported blends and the pastries are fancy, always fresh. This is not the place of which one might need an invitation, but it happens to house the place that does. The family who owns the cafe rented out the basement level, which had only ever been used for storage of old kitchen equipment, tables and chairs after their big renovation a few year ago.

In a short span of time and right under Rick's own nose, a modernly designed speakeasy popped up in that basement,. Rick wasn't quite aware of it's existence until his official invitation, but again he never used to frequent this neighborhood in the past.

Now, it seemed impossible for him to stay away.

The owner of the establishment, La Rose de Nuit, is a woman who he knows far too much about, but not nearly enough. Lori is just younger than himself, with the body and touch of an angel. He's been out of country for the past two weeks and not a night has gone by that her bright forest eyes and sweet, elegant lips weren't haunting him his dreams, teasing him to come home, begging him to finish the job so he could return to her warm embrace. He knows enough about her so far to know when he's in trouble and though she hasn't kicked him out of the bar, he can read her frustration in the way she handles the money from the till and how she disguises her feelings with a look of concentration while she completes the night's deposit.

"Did y'miss me?" he asks her with a lopsided and teasing smile, blue eyes dazzling beneath the bar lights. It's clear he's a bit buzzed. Last call doesn’t apply to him, neither does the fact that the doors are locked and half the lights are off. The music is turned so low he can hardly hear it and her staff have finally scurried into the night after pocketing their tips and weekly wages. It's just them now, "Or y'still mad at me?"

Rick knows it's not the duration of his recent disappearance that bothers her as much as the fact that he had given her no notice of it. He had just up and left. In his defense, he's not used to owing anyone an explanation for his business travels and he still believes he doesn't, in fact, owe anyone anything, unless there's exchange of payment. But he's not stupid. She's miffed and it's his own fault.

"C'mon, Lori," he shuffles down the bar a few steps to the left, where on the bar is a whiskey bottle of his favorite brand. Sitting pretty in the neck of the bottle is a beautiful, recently bloomed french rose. The petals of a soft pink hue look gorgeous under the dim lights, it was the prize bloom of their kind in his own shop. He guides the bottle across the bar top, eyes flickering between the peachy petals and the woman behind the bar. There’s some small hope that if his gift, and a little sweet talking, might pacify her just enough.

"Ain't nearly as gorgeous as you are, but..." he trails, his smile softened as he delicately thumbs one of the petals, "It bloomed just for you as soon as I got back into town."

@mamagrimes

#this is v long but listen #i was randomly inspired??#please dont feel you have to match length at all #ilu #look at r.ick being a fool #mamagrimes #assassin verse

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womenstan · 3 years

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Just Wait Another Day

Happy Birthday @chibisfatou!! Sorry for the delay ily <3

Ao3

Summary :

In which Isa is away for an internship in the States and Liv celebrates her birthday alone, at work... or, does she?

Day in day out, it was always the same time, same place, same people and she was used to this implicitly agreed upon order of things.

Today, though, there was something wrong. Or, not quite wrong, but… Different. She couldn’t tell what it was yet, but she could feel it in the air as she dropped her satchel on her desk.

The receptionists had been particularly invested in their gossiping, sitting a little closer and talking a little faster than usual. Her colleagues had been rushing from room to room, buzzing like bees at work which, while not being exactly out of the ordinary, usually didn’t happen before at least ten or eleven. Even her boss, who usually didn’t even bother to come into work before noon, was standing in front of his office at 7am sharp.

So, Liv knew something was going on.

She shrugged her coat off, hanging it around the back of her chair. Taking her phone out of her pockets, she clicked a few buttons and opened her SMS: Nothing.

She sighed, trying not to let the disappointment she felt overcome her, as she still needed to make it through the day. It’s not like she was expecting Isa to text her this early, I mean, it was barely one am where she was. Still, it was her birthday today and Isa had promised she wouldn’t forget…

Liv shook her head, trying to push the thoughts and the worries away. She forgot you, so what? Get over yourself Liv!

She grabbed one of her empty mugs at random, but felt her body still when she saw which one she’d picked. It was the ‘I Heart NYC’ mug that Isa had brought back from New-York at the end of the last semester. They’d barely had a week together before Isa had been called back to her internship in the States, carrying half of Liv’s heart along with her.

They’d promised each other they would try to make it work. After all, neither were afraid of distance and they were sure that their love could triumph against anything.

Now, though, Liv wasn’t so sure anymore. In the past few weeks, Isa had become more and more distant, cancelling their weekly facetimes on more than one occasion and taking hours and hours to answer Liv’s texts.

It pained Liv and most of the time, she tried not to think about it. She didn’t want to think about the ifs and the whys, because if she started questioning everything, then she knew her self-doubt would get the best of her and they’d fall apart.

So, yeah, she tried not to think about it, but that doesn’t mean she succeeded. She was all alone in their or, well, her vast apartment, all evenings and weekends long, just her and her thoughts, swirling around in her head and poisoning her mind. So, she’d started working more.

She was constantly exhausted now, but that meant she didn’t have the energy to overthink everything. She got to work at 7am and she was never back home before 9pm. On weekends, she worked at a small café next to where she lived. She didn’t need the money per se, but it was what it took to keep her occupied.

With all her friends in relationships or busy working and with her other half enjoying her life halfway across the world… Liv had needed an escape. She’d found it in work. She was also hoping that with all those extra hours she’d saved up, she could take a few days of vacation when Isa would come back from her internship in a month and a half.

Or, well, 46 days, 6 hours and 10 minutes (according to the internship contract), but really, who’s counting (Liv, Liv’s definitely counting).

What hurt the most was scrolling through Isa’s instagram. What used to be a page filled to the brim with pictures of the two of them was now overtaken by shots of Isa’s cool american colleagues. And Liv wasn’t exactly jealous, she was glad that Isa had found friends to hang out with and that she wasn’t lonely. So, no, she wasn’t jealous, but she was definitely worried. Worried that Isa would figure out that her american friends were a lot more fun than Liv and decide to stay in the States for longer, or worse: that she’d find someone that made her heart beat just a little faster than Liv ever could.

Obviously, she never brought her worries up to Isa. Liv knew Isa would feel bad and would try to make more time for her, which would overjoy Liv, but really wouldn’t be fair to Isa. Besides, Liv knew most of her insecurities were most likely unfounded and while part of her brain really wanted to know who that ‘Kelly’ girl Isa kept tagging in posts was, the more logical side of her mind knew that Isa loved her just as much as she loved Isa. It was just hard.

Liv made her way to the coffee maker, silently thanking every God that someone had freshly brewed coffee right before she’d arrived. It wasn’t that she didn’t know how to make coffee, obviously, but the machine seemed to harbour some kind of vendetta against her and Liv was just not in the mood to get splashed by hot water today.

Liv leaned back on the counter as she sipped her coffee, sighing peacefully as she felt the warmth travel through her body. Maybe today wouldn’t be quite as bad as she’d imagined.

She felt someone slide up next to her and turned her head to face her boss, looking at her expectantly.

“Yes?” She asked, raising her eyebrows in question.

Her boss smiled slightly, nudging Liv’s shoulder with her own. “I heard it’s someone’s birthday today…”

Liv couldn’t help her reaction, jumping slightly at her boss’ words. Eyes wide, she opened her mouth to answer, but no words would come out. Her boss’ smile only widened, as she turned to face Liv properly.

“How… How did you…?” Liv started, trying to make sense of her confused thoughts.

“How did I figure out it was your birthday?” Her boss asked, straightening back up and brushing some lint off of her skirt as she did so. She shrugged noncommittally, starting to walk past Liv.

As she reached her level, she added, “Let’s just say that a little bird told me”. With that, she winked, quickly patting Liv’s shoulder and walking away.

Liv could feel the wheel turning in her mind, her eyes narrowed in confusion. She turned towards the direction her boss had gone, but she was nowhere to be seen. Still feeling perplexed, Liv made her way back to her desk and got to work.

As it was nearing lunch time, Liv leaned away from her computer monitor, stretching her arms and her neck. She let out a satisfied noise as her arm cracked slightly. Checking the time on her phone, she noticed it was a little past noon, so she finished what she was writing on her computer and shut the monitor off.

As she rolled her chair back and grabbed her bag, she heard a knock on her office door. She shouted a ‘come in!’, getting up at the same time.

Mila, one of her coworkers, popped her head into the office, smiling at Liv.

“Hey! We’re all grabbing lunch in the cafeteria, and we’d love it if you joined us!” She asked, cheerfully.

Liv narrowed her eyes slightly, surprised by the proposition. Barely anyone ever ate in the cafeteria, unless the weather was too bad to step outside. Mila seemed to really want her to come along though, so Liv nodded, quickly grabbing her things and following her coworker out of the room.

As they walked down the stairs that led to the cafeteria, Liv was stunned by the lack of noise coming from the room. Usually, you could hear employees’ chatters all the way up the staircase, but today, it was so silent that Liv could hear her heels resonate on the floors.

Mila was the first one to reach the cafeteria’s door, but instead of opening it, she stepped to the side and gestured for Liv to step in first.

“Thanks?” Liv said, growing more and more suspicious by the second.

She grabbed the doorknob and pulled. As soon as the door was creaked open, Liv was assaulted by yells of ‘Happy birthday!’. She could barely register the confettis thrown her way or the way off-key singing of her coworkers, because in the middle of the room, standing right in front of her was the last person she’d expected to see.

Isa.

Liv felt her bag drop from her hands and hit the floor, but she didn’t care. She ran towards Isa who waited there, a bright smile plastered on her face and her arms thrown wide open. They collided not-so-softly, sending Isa stumbling a little on her feet.

Liv held her tightly, burrowing her face in Isa’s neck. Isa laughed, hugging her just as hard. Leaning back, Liv took Isa’s face between her hands, still in disbelief that her love was really there, physically, with her.

“What? How? When?” Liv stuttered the series of questions, closing her eyes hard and reopening them to make sure she wasn’t dreaming.

Isa smiled softly, bringing one of her hands to Liv’s face and caressing her skin softly.

“I wasn’t going to miss your birthday, now, was I?”

All Liv could do was laugh, still too stunned to form a proper coherent thought. She brought Isa back in her arms, holding her close to her chest.

“I hope you realize that now that you’re here, I’m never letting go of you again.” Liv said, feeling tears of happiness and relief well up in her eyes.

Isa moved her head back to face Liv’s, a serious expression overtaking her features.

“Good, because I have no intention of leaving again.” She said, looking directly into Liv’s eyes, sincerity and emotions whirling around.

Liv gave her a small, sad smile, as she remembered Isa’s internship. “What about the States? Don’t you have to go back?”

Isa smiled fondly, bringing both of her hands to cradle Liv’s face lovingly. “I cut it short. I missed you too much and I managed to find something else right here, in the Netherlands. With the one I love the most.”

Liv couldn’t help herself, feeling her heart swell up with love to the point where she felt like she would explode. She practically threw herself onto Isa, crashing their lips together in a kiss that said ‘I missed you so much’, ‘please don’t ever leave me again’, ‘I love you’ and so much more all at once.

Liv’s colleagues’ cheers and applause brought Liv out of the little bubble of happiness where only Isa and her existed. She broke the kiss regrettingly, smiling shyly at her coworkers.

Isa leaned her forehead against her, kissing her nose lightly. “Happy birthday. I love you”

Liv smiled, probably brighter than she ever had, and whispered back ‘I love you, so much”.

#skam nl #isa keijser #liv reijners #happy birthday #ilyyyy sas

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chaostheoryy · 5 years

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Flashes of You (A Reddie One-shot)

Summary: Richie’s childhood comes to him in flashes. It isn’t until he travels back to Derry, Maine and sees Eddie Kaspbrak that any of them start to make sense.

Word count: 2,185

Rating: Teen

Warnings: Language

A/N: This is my first time writing for Reddie and I’ve been in the It fandom for approximately 96 hours so forgive me if my characterizations are off.

For two decades, Richie’s childhood came to him in white hot flashes. He couldn’t fully recall a single event or a single friend’s name but he would see details and hear sounds so clear that he couldn’t understand why everything else surrounding these points on the road map of his mind was fuzzy.

The flashes would come at random. Sometimes he’d be going through the mundane moments of life like showering or eating. Other times the flashes would come to him in the middle of a gig. One moment he was setting up the punchline and the next he was staring at a massive statue of Paul Bunyan.

None of the flashes made sense and yet he knew they were somehow all connected: a crimson “V” scribbled over a sloppy “S”, an underground hammock, a pink polo, a fanny pack full of medicine bottles, the letter “E” carved into a wooden plank.

And oh God, the laugh. Every so often his ears would ring with the sound of a boy’s laughter — a sound so pure and contagious that he couldn’t help but smile every time he heard it. He didn’t know who it was that laugh belonged to, but he never wanted it to stop. He didn’t tell jokes for the fame or the money. He became a trash mouth comedian for that laugh.

***

When Richie got the call from Mike, his stomach flipped. Flashes bombarded him like lighting bolts striking the ocean. Blood, lifeless bodies, a red balloon, a condemned home surrounded by weeds. It wasn’t clear as to what these flashes meant, but Richie couldn’t deny that he was afraid. There was a reason he couldn’t remember his childhood. Something terrible happened in Derry, Maine and, frankly, he didn’t want to know what it was.

After throwing up and downing a couple of drinks to burn away the taste of his own bile, he made it out on stage for his comedy special. He was a mess, stumbling over his bits and forgetting the punchline to his opening joke. A man shouted “you suck” from the audience but Richie just smiled. That soft laughter of the boy was ringing in his ears again.

He wasn’t going to Derry tomorrow to follow through on some cryptic oath he couldn’t even remember making. He was going to Derry for that laugh.

***

The moment Richie stepped through the doors of the Chinese restaurant with Beverly and Ben, he locked eyes with a stranger across the foyer. His hair was slicked back, his brow creased with incessant worry. A small smile tugged ever so slightly at the corner of the stranger’s mouth and suddenly Richie felt like he couldn’t breathe.

Eddie.

The flashes started again, only this time with a wider scope: the crimson “V” scribbled over the “S” on Eddie’s arm cast, the underground hammock where Eddie draped himself over Richie and knocked his glasses off with his toes, the pink polo that Eddie loved to wear whenever he needed to convince his mom to let him hang out with the Losers, the fanny pack hooked around Eddie’s waist that held every stupid pill his dipshit doctor had prescribed to him, and the letter “E” carved beside Richie’s own initial on the kissing bridge.

Richie’s stomach flipped and a lump formed in his throat. Eddie Kaspbrak was the first person he had ever loved and it took him two decades to even remember that.

“Fuck me,” he muttered under his breath before following Beverly and Ben to the table. How he was going to get through this, he honestly couldn’t say.

***

Dinner somehow went even worse than Richie expected from a bunch of friends-turned-strangers getting together for the first time in twenty plus years. The food was great and the conversations were surprisingly lively up until the point Mike brought up the murderous clown from their childhood. All of a sudden the table started rattling and the bowl of fortune cookies turned into a smorgasbord of nightmares. Richie’s own cookie mutated into an eyeball with tentacles and attempted to crawl across the table toward him like a zombie. He couldn’t recall a time in his entire life where he had been more disgusted.

Amidst all the chaos, he kept his eyes on Eddie. The man was terrified, trembling in the corner as a cookie with the wing of a bat fluttered around and shrieked at him. The attack brought back more memories of his childhood, moments where he had done everything he could to protect and comfort Eddie — drawing Eddie’s eyes from the horrors of Pennywise’s illusions, pushing Eddie behind him to keep him out of harm’s way, firmly grasping Eddie’s shoulder whenever he was afraid to remind him that he wasn’t alone.

When the illusion stopped and the dust settled, Richie bolted from the restaurant as fast as he could. He couldn’t stay and face the facts. If he stayed, he was going to die. And, on top of that, he would be forced to come to terms with the ugly ass truth that was his feelings for Eddie. Being closeted for his entire life was one thing. Finding out that the man he had unknowingly been in love with for nearly thirty years was married to somebody else was a whole other level of suffering.

Standing in the parking lot, Richie was surprised to find Eddie at his side. Eddie wanted out just as badly as him and, frankly, Richie was relieved. If Eddie ran away just like him, they would both survive. The idea of going back to the life where he no longer knew who Eddie was sucked. But a life of oblivious wandering and shitty stand-up was better than a life where Eddie was murdered by a psychotic, shapeshifting clown.

Mike tried with every ounce of his being to convince them to stay and defeat Pennywise together but their will to live was stronger. Richie hopped in his Mustang and headed back to the inn with Eddie hot on his trail.

***

Neither Richie nor Eddie said anything to one another when they got back to the Derry Town House. They simply bolted up the stairs to their respective rooms and started packing. Having brought nothing more than a small carry-on sized duffle bag, Richie finished gathering his belongings before Eddie had even managed to lay his clothes out on the bed.

“What’re you moving in?” Richie teased when he peeked his head into Eddie’s room and saw the two open suitcases on the floor. “Look at all this shit.”

Eddie frowned. “Fuck off. I didn’t even know what the hell I was doing coming to Derry so how was I supposed to know what to bring?”

“I only own like two shirts. Guess I’m not in any position to judge.”

Richie eyed the pile of clothes and was drawn to a vaguely familiar shade of pink. A soft smile yanked at the corner of his mouth.

“Your style hasn’t changed much has it, Eds?”

Eddie followed his gaze to the pink polo laying by the foot of the bed. “Myra hates any outfit that’s not a suit and tie,” Eddie said as he continued folding his collection of dress pants.

“Well, somebody needs to pull the stick out of her ass ‘cause that shirt is bitchin’, man.”

Richie’s heart nearly soared when Eddie laughed. That was it, the whole reason Richie came back.

A long silence blanketed the room as Richie watched Eddie work. Twenty-seven years later and Eddie was still as precise as can be, making sure every article of clothing was folded into the same dimensions before he put them in the suitcase. Things had to be as perfect and clean as possible. At least, that’s what Eddie’s mom had taught him.

“Jesus Christ, would you pick up the pace? I’m gonna pass a fucking kidney stone before you finish packing,” Richie quipped to break the silence.

Eddie threw him a look. “Don’t you have somewhere to be, dickwad?”

“Not until Tuesday night when your mom and I meet up for our weekly date night at Olive Garden.”

“Fuck you,” Eddie snapped despite the amused gleam in his eye.

“I’m serious, Spaghetti. You better not cock-block me on my date or I swear to God I’m shoving those unlimited breadsticks up your ass.”

Eddie stopped all of a sudden, the shirt in his grasp hanging limply in wait to be folded. The expression on his face was almost impossible to read. Richie felt his chest tighten.

“Eds? You alright?” Richie asked hesitantly. “Look, if the mom jokes are too much, I can ease off-“

“No it’s fine. It’s just that no one’s ever...” Eddie’s thought trailed off. “How much do you remember? About our childhood?”

Richie adjusted the shoulder strap of his bag and shrugged. “Not much. Bits and pieces used to come back in flashes but I couldn’t even figure out what the hell they all meant until I got here. It’s like some fucked up jigsaw puzzle that my brain’s still trying to put together.”

Eddie laid the shirt in his hands down on the bed and leaned against the wooden post. “It doesn’t make any sense, man. How can we be best friends for years and then suddenly forget everything about each other once we separate? You don’t just-“ Eddie swallowed. The worry lines on his brow were even deeper than before. “I saw you on TV — one of your comedy specials. I looked right at you and, even though I had never heard your name before I just got this feeling like...Like I knew you.”

Richie felt like his throat was going to collapse in on itself. If Eddie had gone through the same things he had, what kind of flashes had come to him over the years? What pieces of Richie Tozier had stuck in his brain?

“Did you finish the special?”

“God no. It was terrible. I don’t know who the dipshit is that writes your jokes but he fucking sucks.”

Richie grinned from ear to ear. “I’m firing him the second I get back to New York.”

Eddie returned his smile with one of his own. “Good. You’re ten times funnier than any of the shit he writes anyway.”

Richie’s breath hitched. “Holy shit, Eds.”

“What?” Eddie’s eyes grew wide with concern.

“I think that’s the first time you’ve ever complimented me,” Richie joked, stepping toward Eddie with his arms outstretched, “Come here you little Smurf. I always knew you secretly cared about me.”

“Fuck that. I take it back!” Eddie tried to slink out of the way but Richie scooped him into his arms and crushed his entire body in a bear hug.

Eddie groaned as Richie squeezed him. “You’re gonna give me an asthma attack.”

“You don’t even have asthma, fuckhead.”

Eddie went still in his grasp, his squirming ceasing without warning. He was quiet for a long moment. Richie swallowed and eased his hold, worried he had squeezed too hard and hurt Eddie. But instead of slipping out of the hug when the vice of Richie’s arms loosened, Eddie reached up and clutched at Richie’s jacket, hugging him back. Richie’s heart skipped a beat.

“I missed you,” Eddie mumbled lowly, “Even though I didn’t know it, I fucking missed you.”

Richie felt breathless. His eyes burned, threatening to form tears he never planned on shedding. He tightened his arms around Eddie again.

“You’re such a sap,” he murmured, “It’s a miracle you got a woman to marry your wussy ass.”

Eddie slammed the toe of his shoe into Richie’s shin just hard enough to really make him feel it. “Fuck you.”

Richie smiled despite the pain ringing in his leg. “Fuck you too, Eds.”

They hugged each other tightly for a good thirty seconds before Richie pried himself away. “Would you finish packing your shit so we can get the hell out of here?”

Eddie stumbled backward. “Fuck. Yeah. Gimme like ten minutes and I’ll meet you downstairs.”

“I’ll head down there now and make sure our psycho friends don’t summon the devil and get themselves murdered.”

“Good idea.”

Richie headed for the door only to pause in the doorframe when Eddie called his name. “What’s up?”

Eddie smirked, a familiar mischievous gleam in his eye that Richie had grown all too familiar with as a kid. “I probably should’ve told you this years ago but I fucked your mom.”

Richie rolled his eyes and flipped Eddie off. “Hurry up, asshole,” he grumbled before stepping out into the hall and leaving Eddie to finish packing.

As he made his way toward the staircase, Richie felt his chest swell with joy. Eddie had missed him just as much as he missed Eddie and, now that they were back together, they were joking with the same ease as they did when they were younger.

His entire adult life, Richie had wondered why he’d never fallen in love with anyone and now he understood why: Eddie Kaspbrak held his heart. Always had and always would.

***

Tagging: @justauthoring, @beepbeepstiney, @atownofeggs

#Tumblr changed it’s text format so I’m sorry for the long post #I couldn’t find the Read More tab???#Yikes #Hope y’all enjoy this though #Reddie #Richie/Eddie #Richie Tozier #Eddie Kaspbrak #It Fanfiction #It (2017)#It Chapter Two #Reddie Fanfiction #My fic #It (2019)

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mostlysignssomeportents · 5 years

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Pluralistic: 25 Mar 2020 (National Emergency Library, Kaiser threatens nurses, no more O'Reilly events, White House pastor's coronavirus funnies, automatic bill-relief notices, Mat Ricardo's lockdown TV, Xi's internal enemies, coronavirus meets immigration detention, doctors hoard choloroquine, toilet paper separator, Conzealand goes virtual, the Postal Plan, Volante's masks, and more!)

Today's links

Internet Archive lifts lending restrictions on ebooks: They're calling it the "National Emergency Library."

Kaiser threatens to fire Oakland nurses who wear their own masks: They're treating positive patients from a cruise ship with insufficient PPE.

No more O'Reilly events: We've been here before, kinda.

Trump's Bible study teacher thinks coronavirus is God's wrath: For homosexuality, China, environmentalism, Catholics, and women in the workforce.

A chatbot that petitions companies for financial relief during the crisis: Donotpay's robot lawyer is here for you.

East London showman Mat Ricardo's Youtube playlists: Lockdown TV for "comedy, variety, circus, magic, dance, music."

Xi's enemies sense weakness: Autocracies are only as good as their last crisis-response.

Locked down in a lockup: Coronavirus meets immigration detention.

Doctors hoard choloroquine: MDs to lupus sufferers, "Drop dead."

Toilet paper separator: Covid crafting for household essentials.

Conzealand goes virtual: The first time a Worldcon isn't in person since WWII.

Posties are key to America's emergency response: The only agency that could deliver covid meds to every US household in a single day.

Volante's masks for covid responders: Streetwear for Superheroes.

This day in history: 2005, 2010, 2019

Colophon: Recent publications, current writing projects, current reading

Internet Archive lifts lending restrictions on ebooks (permalink)

The amazing people at the Internet Archive maintain a digital lending library: they buy and scan one copy of every book (pretty much every book, ever) and lend it out to one person at a time.

They've just announced that during the crisis, they are lifting the one-borrower-at-a-time restriction and allowing unlimited borrowing, "to meet the needs of a global community of displaced learners". They call it the "National Emergency Library."

https://blog.archive.org/2020/03/24/announcing-a-national-emergency-library-to-provide-digitized-books-to-students-and-the-public/

It's got more than a million titles.

https://archive.org/details/nationalemergencylibrary

They're calling on all who can afford it to buy books to support authors and booksellers during the crisis, Authors can also request to have their titles removed:

https://docs.google.com/document/d/1QjErbouWG7pUlzcxPcRk4YEtbYs8ItlVTgLa1DfGh68/edit

It's a bold move, but it's got widespread support. Here's a list of endorsers. I signed on too.

https://docs.google.com/document/d/1vkl3RX4CzpRTQsoG1tsdHC0foYiU7A8U_Vt1UyVboP8/edit

Kaiser threatens to fire Oakland nurses who wear their own masks (permalink)

Nurses at Kaiser Permanente in Oakland are treating patients from the Grand Princess cruise ship, at least 21 of whom have tested positive for covid-19. The nurses are working without adequate PPE, thanks to a national shortage (and asshole hoarders).

https://theintercept.com/2020/03/21/oakland-coronavirus-hospital-kaiser/

Nurses who report for work wearing their own N95 masks have been threatened with immediate dismissal for "insubordination."

Akela Lacy from The Intercept asked Kaiser's Marc Brown about it, but he ducked the question.

https://theintercept.com/2020/03/24/kaiser-permanente-nurses-coronavirus/

The nurses say that their supply cupboards are locked down, and they're being asked to treat potentially infected patients whether or not they can find someone to unlock the supply cupboard.

No more O'Reilly events (permalink)

I attended my first O'Reilly conference in, I think, 1997? And I sponsored my first O'Reilly con, the first P2P con, in 2001 (?). I spent years on the committee for the Emerging Tech conference, and I've keynoted more O'Reilly cons than I can recall.

These events have been some of the most important gatherings I've ever attended: places where I made lifelong friends and collaborators (I first met my wife at an Etech con), and learned so much.

This is (obviously) not a good time to be in the event business. For perfectly good – and nevertheless so, so sad – reasons, O'Reilly has just exited the in-person conference business.

Forever.

https://www.oreilly.com/conferences/from-laura-baldwin.html

"Without understanding when this global health emergency may come to an end, we can't plan for or execute on a business that will be forever changed as a result of this crisis. With large technology vendors moving their events completely on-line, we believe the stage is set for a new normal moving forward when it comes to in-person events."

The covid collapse feels a lot like the post-911/dotcom crash moment. That was when we lost the Etech conference, whose focus had always been "what are the most speculative things the weirdest nerds are doing?" No one had a budget for that kind of thing after the crash.

The dotcom crash and the loss of Etech were hugely traumatic, but there WERE silver linings. Etech's crash begat FOO Camp, consistently the best events I've ever attended – small gatherings of smart weirdos who programmed their own conference in realtime.

It also created a brief moment of breathing space in tech, which had its origins in driven tech enthusiasts but had been steadily colonized by buck-chasers who upped sticks and quit when the money disappeared from the sector. For a brief moment, mid-decade, people who wanted to build meaningful technologies for users – not investors – could hire engineering talent and find office space. That was ended by the finance bubble that shattered in 2008, but for a while there, it was good.

It's brutal to think that I'll never go to another O'Reilly con, but my hopeful inner voice tells me that there might be something as wonderful on the horizon as FOO Camp. I'm so sorry for all the O'Reilly conference staff, who are amazing and have done so much good work.

As O'Reilly CEO Laura Baldwin writes, "No offense to 'Netflix and chill' but how about we move toward 'Code and conquer' as our new mantra during these trying times?"

Trump's Bible study teacher thinks coronavirus is God's wrath (permalink)

Wanna hear about an extreme religious far-right bigot who thinks that coronavirus is God's punishment for Chinese excess, American tolerance for homosexuality, and environmentalism?

https://theintercept.com/2020/03/24/trump-cabinet-bible-studies-coronavirus/

Ralph Drollinger is an evangelical pastor. He says Catholicism is "the world's largest false religion." He says women working outside the workplace is against scripture. He runs Capitol Ministries, whose goal is to have 200 ministries in 200 world capitals.

Drollinger may sound like a garden variety Christian Taliban, but he's awfully distinguished.

For one thing, he runs regular Bible study classes…at the White House.

His scriptural lessons: God would approve of kids in cages. God also wants lower taxes on rich people.

His twice-weekly Capital Hill Bible classes are regularly attended by 52 GOP lawmakers, sponsored by Kevin McCarthy [R-CA] and John Thune [R-SD].

His Wednesday White House Bible study classes are attended by Ben Carson, Betsy DeVos, Alex Azar, and Mike Pompeo. Pence, too!

His organization has received official endorsements from Joni Ernst, James Lankford and other GOP senators.

This anti-Catholic, homophobic, sinophobic, anti-enviromentalist, lunatic is squarely in the mainstream of Republican thought.

A chatbot that petitions companies for financial relief during the crisis (permalink)

The $3/month DoNotPay service has added a new covid-19 service: automatically petitioning the companies that bill you for mercy based on the coronavirus econopocalypse.

https://www.theverge.com/2020/3/25/21192765/donotpay-rent-bill-delay-chatbot-coronavirus-extension-laws-pandemic

Using a chatbot, you determine which of your bills are eligible for relief. Then it generates a "compassionate and polite request" seeking help. If the company does not comply, it follows up with a firmer letter citing relevant state/federal laws.

https://donotpay.com/

East London showman Mat Ricardo's Youtube playlists (permalink)

Under normal circumstances, showman MatRicardo is either traveling around doing his juggling and conjuring act, or hosting amazing variety show nights in east London. Neither of those are an option, now, obvious.

Instead, Ricardo is curating playlists of "comedy, variety, circus, magic, dance, music and other kinds of culture and entertainment to distract and amuse."

https://www.matricardo.com/blog/2020/3/17/lockdown-tv

https://www.matricardo.com/blog/2020/3/24/lockdown-tv-week-2

Highlights:

Kids in the Hall: "I speak no English"

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6vgoEhsJORU

Gene Kelly: "Summer Stock"

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fFJrV3pI5Zs

"The Knife-Throwing Mother & her Children (1950s)"

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CHxodb2uUhQ

Mat Ricardo: "How to charm a German audience"

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=95ECcHLvRYA

Xi's enemies sense weakness (permalink)

Autocracies are intrinsically unstable because their have-nots (who tend to be numerous) believe that they have no path to becoming haves, and see no legitimate purpose to preserve the social order.

China has stabilized its autocracy by simultaneously lifting hundreds of millions out of poverty and by using internet surveillance to both neutralize dissidents and spot its most corrupt and dangerous politicians.

But under Xi, internet surveillance has primarily become a weapon for spotting and neutralizing dissidents, and less so a way of spotting self-dealing technocrats and shutting them down. This created "authoritarian blindness," which meant Xi didn't spot or respond to Wuhan in good time.

https://pluralistic.net/2020/02/24/pluralist-your-daily-link-dose-24-feb-2020/#thatswhatxisaid

This failure ruptured Chinese public confidence in Xi, and emboldened his critics. Ren Zhiqiang (a party "princeling" whose father was a top Mao official, who made a fortune in real-estate and has been an outspoke Xi critic) issued a "viral" jeremiad against Xi this month.

Ren's post, "An official call to arms against Xi: The clown who insists on wearing the emperor's new clothes," spread on Twitter and other foreign services (he has been banned from Wechat for years).

https://asiatimes.com/2020/03/as-virus-recedes-in-china-anti-xi-revolt-spreads/

Ren disappeared shortly thereafter and is said to have been sentenced to 15 years in a secret prison near Beijing where his interrogators have been ordered to mete out "harsh treatment" to the 70-year-old.

Ren is a bellwether for other Chinese power-brokers, many of whom resent Xi and his power-consolidation techniques, such as his 2018 corruption purge that preferentially targeted corrupt officials who supported Xi's rivals.

https://web.archive.org/web/20181222163946/http://peterlorentzen.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/11/Lorentzen-Lu-Crackdown-Nov-2018-Posted-Version.pdf

These grandees have been sharpening their knives for Xi for years, and coronavirus has made him vulnerable. Ren was the first to turn on him publicly, but I'm sure he won't be the last.

Locked down in a lockup (permalink)

You know what's more terrifying and frustrating than being locked down at home during a coronavirus pandemic? Being imprisoned during a coronavirus pandemic, crammed in with others, deprived of soap and supplies.

It's very bad in regular jails and prisons, but if anything, it's even worse in ICE's gulags, where thousands of law-abiding long-term US residents – and asylum seekers – have been detained by the Trump administration in order to please his sadistic base.

For example, Ian has lived in the US for 20 years. His wife and children are US citizens. He was detained while awaiting a decision on his spousal visa. His wife is a nurse treating covid patients. His children miss their father.

https://www.themarshallproject.org/2020/03/24/everybody-s-scared-panic-at-immigrant-detention-center-after-positive-coronavirus-test

Ian has a heart condition that puts him at severe risk if he contracts coronavirus. He's in a 40-person dormitory with a recent arrival from China who is exhibiting symptoms.

He's in NJ's Essex detention facility, which is serviced by Corecivic, formerly Corrections Corporation of America, a notorious human rights abuser with a long history of beltway banditry while running private prisons. Some detainees there are on hunger strike.

One of the medical staffers there was confirmed by ICE to have contracted coronavirus. The next day, ICE denied that he was medical staff. ICE would not comment on the contradiction.

(Image: Fibonacci Blue, CC BY)

Doctors hoard choloroquine (permalink)

After Trump made misleading statements about the safety and efficacy of treating covid-19 with chloroquine, members of his cult began dropping dead of overdoses on the antimalarial drug.

https://www.cnn.com/2020/03/23/health/arizona-coronavirus-chloroquine-death/index.html

But it wasn't just low-information Trumpers who took the advice to heart. Pharmacists are seeing surges in massive orders of chloroquine from doctors and even dentists who are self-prescribing in order to hoard, and then lying about it when the pharmacists ask for explanations.

https://www.propublica.org/article/doctors-are-hoarding-unproven-coronavirus-medicine-by-writing-prescriptions-for-themselves-and-their-families

This hoarding behavior deprives people who rely on chloroquine for conditions like rheumatoid arthritis and lupus of their medication during a pandemic emergency.

"People are losing their minds about this product. We're selling so much of this stuff and people are just stockpiling it prophylactically if anybody in their family gets sick — they're just holding on to it." -Brian Brito, Miami pharmacy owner.

"Currently, both nationally and in West Virginia, some prescribers have begun writing prescriptions for these drugs for family, friends, and coworkers in anticipation of Covid-19 related illness." -West Virginia Board of Pharmacy

Toilet paper separator (permalink)

The Toilet Paper Splitter: a DIY project to separate a single two-ply roll into two single-ply rolls. Requires two paint rollers, a couple bolts, a rubber band, and some stiff metal for a handle.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-JEfCAFHcPk

Conzealand goes virtual (permalink)

The World Science Fiction Convention began in 1939, when 200 sf fans who'd come to New York for the World's Fair gathered together (while explicitly excluding the leftist "Futurian" writers, who held their own counter-convention).

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/1st_World_Science_Fiction_Convention

Since then, there have been 77 Worldcons in total, one per year, excluding 1942/3/4/5, during which WWII intervened.

This year's Worldcon is Conzealand, the first Worldcon in New Zealand. Except it won't be. The organizers have wisely decided to move to a virtual event.

The hotels are allowing for cancellations, though there's some work to be done to allow the organizers to do mass cancellations for their group block. Different airlines have different rules regarding cancellations.

https://conzealand.nz/hotels?utm_source=CoNZealand

They're expecting to offer limited refunds to participants who don't want to a virtual con experience. They'll be offering a new online rate by April 15, and kids memberships are refundable now (but they ask you to forebear as their own personal funds are on the line).

Potential panelists are requested to put some thought into how they might help a virtual con with its programming.

This is incredibly disappointing, of course.I know the organizers and visited Wellington and the venue, both of which are incredible.

https://conzealand.nz/blog/2020/03/25/conzealand-special-announcement

I've been looking forward to attending for years. But it was the right call to make. it won't be the last such disappointment, either.

Please consider supporting the organizers by buying an online membership once they're offered and attending the con from wherever you are.

Posties are key to America's emergency response (permalink)

The USPS is amazing. A fully self-supporting federal agency that provides universal service as well as good, well-paid jobs with benefits and pensions. It's also a vital lifeline during crises.

https://www.wired.com/story/us-postal-plan-coronavirus-vaccine-doomsday/

Since the Cold War, posties have been integral to America's crisis plans. They were once deputized to catalog the dead and the living after a nuclear holocaust, distributing Safety Notification Cards (POD Form 810). Mail trucks would have been repurposed as ambulances.

Both Obama and GWB integrated posties into their plans for biological attacks, planning to have masked and gowned letter carriers deliver Cipro door to door (the "Postal Plan").

https://obamawhitehouse.archives.gov/the-press-office/executive-order-medical-countermeasures-following-a-biological-attack

As the DHS noted in its prep documents, the USPS is the only federal agency that could knock on every door in America in a single day.

When (if?) effective covid meds are available, it's likely a postal worker will deliver them to you.

Now is a good time to remember that the GOP have been trying to dismantle the universal, self-funding, vital USPS for decades, so that private carriers like UPS and Fedex can cream off the most profitable parts of its business and leave rural Americans in the cold.

Volante's masks for covid responders (permalink)

I've long admired (and worn) clothing from Volante Design, whose "streetwear for superheroes" is made by well-paid, onshore workers and is cosplay-adjascent — the kind of thing you can wear out and about, but also to a con.

Now, they're making masks for covid responders.

The masks are made from cloth and can protect N95 masks from contamination as they are reused (they have a pocket for this purpose). They can also prevent you from touching your face, and partially contain coughs when medical masks are not available

https://www.volantedesign.us/

They're seeking donations to cover the cost of making these and shipping them to orgs that have requested cloth masks:

https://docs.google.com/spreadsheets/d/1txEanDkIrJ5GNfSk-zlXkTlB-bQPNRN_Y69qEwmdme8/htmlview

A $105.50 donation lets them make 50 masks. They're also selling them on a sliding scale to those in need.

This day in history (permalink)

#15yrsago Matrix online game hires real actors to play in-game characters http://pc.gamespy.com/pc/the-matrix-online/598441p1.html

#15yrsago Fox is advertising on Grokster, also suing to put Grokster out of business https://web.archive.org/web/20051018083600/http://publications.mediapost.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=Articles.san&s=28535&Nid=12722&p=244505

#15yrsago US sabotaging efforts to create humanitarian copyright and patent policies https://web.archive.org/web/20050916104840/http://www.corante.com/copyfight/archives/2005/03/25/united_states_v_wipos_development_agenda.php

#15yrsago Ex-coder's account of life as a bike courier https://web.archive.org/web/20050323071902/http://www.kuro5hin.org/story/2005/3/19/133129/548

#10yrsago Profit-sharing arrangements among Somali pirates https://web.archive.org/web/20100323020702/https://www.undispatch.com/somali-pirates-buisiness-model

#1yrago Peak Indifference: are we reaching climate's denial/nihilism tipping point? https://www.wired.com/story/we-might-be-reaching-peak-indifference-on-climate-change/

#1yrago London developer makes last-minute changes to lock poor kids out of "communal" playground https://www.theguardian.com/cities/2019/mar/25/too-poor-to-play-children-in-social-housing-blocked-from-communal-playground

#1yrago Chinese censors incinerate entire run of a kickstarted Call of Cthulhu RPG sourcebook https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G9Urosc-JEY

#1yrago The Vessel: a perfect symbol for the grifter capitalism of New York City's privatized Hudson Yards "neighborhood" https://thebaffler.com/latest/fuck-the-vessel-wagner

Colophon (permalink)

Today's top sources: Wendy Hanamura (https://twitter.com/whanamura), Geekologie (https://geekologie.com/), Naked Capitalism (https://nakedcapitalism.com/).

Currently writing: I'm getting geared up to start work my next novel, "The Lost Cause," a post-GND novel about truth and reconciliation.

Currently reading: Just started Lauren Beukes's forthcoming Afterland: it's Y the Last Man plus plus, and two chapters in, it's amazeballs. Last month, I finished Andrea Bernstein's "American Oligarchs"; it's a magnificent history of the Kushner and Trump families, showing how they cheated, stole and lied their way into power. I'm getting really into Anna Weiner's memoir about tech, "Uncanny Valley." I just loaded Matt Stoller's "Goliath" onto my underwater MP3 player and I'm listening to it as I swim laps.

Latest podcast: Data – the new oil, or potential for a toxic oil spill? https://craphound.com/podcast/2020/03/23/data-the-new-oil-or-potential-for-a-toxic-oil-spill/

Upcoming appearances:

Quarantine Book Club, April 1, 3PM Pacific https://www.eventbrite.com/e/quarantine-book-club-cory-doctorow-tickets-100931360416

Museums and the Web, April 2, 12PM-3PM Pacific https://mw20.museweb.net/

Upcoming books: "Poesy the Monster Slayer" (Jul 2020), a picture book about monsters, bedtime, gender, and kicking ass. Pre-order here: https://us.macmillan.com/books/9781626723627?utm_source=socialmedia&utm_medium=socialpost&utm_term=na-poesycorypreorder&utm_content=na-preorder-buynow&utm_campaign=9781626723627

(we're having a launch for it in Burbank on July 11 at Dark Delicacies and you can get me AND Poesy to sign it and Dark Del will ship it to the monster kids in your life in time for the release date).

"Attack Surface": The third Little Brother book, Oct 20, 2020. https://us.macmillan.com/books/9781250757531

"Little Brother/Homeland": A reissue omnibus edition with a new introduction by Edward Snowden: https://us.macmillan.com/books/9781250774583

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dipulb3 · 4 years

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How the pandemic has changed Americans' spending and saving habits

New Post has been published on https://appradab.com/how-the-pandemic-has-changed-americans-spending-and-saving-habits/

How the pandemic has changed Americans' spending and saving habits

Appradab Business asked readers how the pandemic has changed their spending and saving habits. Here’s what some of them had to say.

Paul Grim described himself and his wife, Michelle, as “more savers than spenders” before the pandemic struck.

Then Grim was laid off from his IT job. His wife, who is still working, has reduced her 401(k) contributions to free up some cash.

“We have been dipping into our emergency savings to cover our bills where unemployment falls short,” he said.

The couple, who live in upstate New York with their dog, Barley, are eating at home, minimizing impulse purchases and postponing pricey things like dental work.

“Once I am working again we intend to increase the amount of our emergency fund to ensure we are even more well-prepared for any potential future financial emergency, no matter how severe,” Grim said.

Jim Stearns of Alaska runs big events for nonprofits, including the state’s annual music festival Salmonfest. But his business dried up once large gatherings were canceled.

When he started collecting unemployment he was getting $800 a week, but that has since fallen to $200 a week, after the temporary $600 weekly federal supplement expired. Now he is tapping his savings to support himself and his teenage daughter.

“I’m spending very little as my savings slowly but surely diminishes by the day,” he said.

Stearns is less worried about himself than the hundreds of vendors and musicians he normally books for events. “I can limp along and survive. But the tragedy of this is this incredible trickle-down effect.”

Slashing expenses, saving more

Sarah Way reworked her family budget when her part-time job in California was cut back to one day a week and her husband’s employer temporarily cut his pay in half. Travel, dinners out and commuting expenses were eliminated by default because of the pandemic. But she went even deeper.

“We parked a car and took it off insurance. We cut cable TV. We slashed the grocery bill. After four months, my hubby’s salary went back to normal, but we didn’t adjust our budget back up,” Way said.

Instead, she noted, “We have increased our retirement savings and built a six-month cash reserve. We did complete a few house projects that had gone unfinished, but for the most part we are in better shape now than we were before Covid.”

Natalie Sawyer, a school administrator in Texas whose husband is a retired military officer and now a teacher, also took the pandemic as an opportunity to power-drive household savings.

“Before Covid, I spent money without even thinking about it. We ate out a lot and I shopped for things that I didn’t necessarily need. It was a kind of free-for-all with my money. Once Covid hit and [we] were forced to stay in, we started cooking all of [our] meals,” Sawyer said.

“With that in mind, starting in March I decided to put $500 a month in an interest-bearing online savings account just to see if I could make it work.”

Sawyer has saved an extra $4,200 so far. Even though she has resumed some shopping, she said, “I find myself not spending nearly as much as I used to and we’re still cooking a lot more at home. … Covid helped us realize that we don’t need most of the stuff that we were spending on.”

Karen Jones works in the cloud software industry in Oregon. Her husband, Kim, whose work is tied to outdoor concerts and fairs, was laid off early on in the pandemic, then brought back in June. But he was laid off again in mid-August.

Jones initially halted contributions to her 401(k) and put the money into their savings account. “I wanted cash that I could get to right away if needed and I didn’t have faith that the market wouldn’t slide further and negate any contributions that I made during that time,” she said.

The couple canceled vacation plans and paid off their credit cards. The extra money her husband got as a result of the temporary $600 a week federal unemployment subsidy went toward savings. Jones is also saving money on gas and lunches out because she has been working from home.

“We still eat out or [do] takeout once a week to support local businesses, but are not looking for any other big ticket activities such as vacations through the summer of next year,” Jones said.

Putting life on hold

Michelle Williams graduated from college during the Great Recession in 2008. And it was only recently that she and her husband, Sheldon, had felt financially and professionally secure enough to consider trading up to a better house from their starter home in Missouri. They also were going to start a family.

Now they’re holding off.

Williams, who works for her county’s public library, didn’t lose her job. But her husband was laid off in March. He has since found new work, but their household income is a little less than before. Still, Williams said, “We are very, very lucky.”

Normally she’d put any extra money they made toward their mortgage or student loan debt. And she had planned to start saving for retirement before Covid hit, but now all spare cash is used to create a six-month financial cushion should they lose their jobs in the next year or have a big medical expense. “I don’t know what might be coming in the near future,” Williams said.

Paying off debts

Kalikoweo Keolanui-Daniele and her husband, Louis Daniele, both work for a coffee producer in Hawaii and live in a remote area, where their home — now paid off — runs on solar power and rainwater. They also grow their own vegetables.

Neither has been laid off, but Keolanui said the pandemic has made a huge impact on their money habits.

She used their stimulus check to pay down credit card debt and put more money toward her auto loan so she can pay it off faster. Plus, she added, “I put at least half [my paycheck] toward savings and plan to continue to do this to build up an emergency nest egg.”

They’ve eliminated all non-essential spending — from recreational shopping to haircuts and beauty treatments. Keolanui did, however, invest in a good pair of hair scissors.

“I feel more and more comfortable the bigger that nest egg gets,” she said. “You just don’t know what’s going to happen. There’s so much uncertainty.”

Looking to buy a home

Gillian Needham, a mental health practitioner, and her partner, Mike Ryerse, were not savers before the pandemic. They used to spend most of their disposable income traveling from their home in Minnesota to see their favorite bands.

But the pandemic has provided them an opportunity to squirrel away money.

“Since Covid began, we have dropped event and bar attendance to zero and have been able to save nearly $10,000 in the last seven months,” Needham said. That money is now earmarked to help them buy their first house.

Looking ahead, Needham expects they’ll continue to save and not only because there’s not much they do during the cold winters. “[The longer] I do something the more it sticks,” she said.

‘Comfort shopping’

Anna Harrington, a college professor in Tennessee, has never been much of a shopper. She used to spend money on plants, concerts and theater. But since the pandemic, she’s become a kind of impulse shopper.

“I’m ‘comfort shopping’ the way that others ‘comfort eat,'” Harrington said. “I’m saving and spending the same amounts as before — I’m lucky that my job is secure. But this past summer, I bought the oddest things I never would have normally bought — a sunrise alarm clock, pink fuzzy bunny slippers, the entire Buffy the Vampire CD collection, and vintage furniture from the 1970s,” Harrington said.

“When the bunny slippers arrived, I thought, ‘What am I doing?'”

Donating more than ever

Harrington also said that she’s making more charitable contributions than ever, including donating her entire stimulus check.

So is Kristina Laursen-Carr, a substitute teacher in upstate New York with four children. She feels lucky that her family’s finances have remained stable. Her husband, Joseph, a helicopter pilot who is retired from the military, is the main breadwinner and works for an air ambulance company.

When the pandemic hit, Laursen-Carr no longer traveled to pick up their two daughters and bring them home from college every weekend. And the family didn’t take vacation this summer. So she used the money they saved to bolster their retirement savings and help others.

“The best thing we started to do was buy food [and other] items for our local food bank on a weekly basis. We donate between $20 to $30 each week,” Laursen-Carr said.

Doyle Tarver, a retiree now living in Mexico, said his income — from Social Security and savings — has remained steady. But Tarver said he has been spending more in recent months than before the pandemic to support local businesses, even if it means sometimes buying things he doesn’t need. And he’s been tipping wait staff in restaurants up to 50%.

“I feel fortunate to be in the financial situation I am in and think everyone in a position to help should do so,” Tarver said. “There are many out there who have lost their jobs or had their hours reduced and need our help.”

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bellsmj · 5 years

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bad liar

summary: peter parker wasn’t the best at keeping secrets. god knows how the world hasn’t figured out he’s spider-man. but his relationship with michelle jones was something he tried hard to keep it just between themselves.

5 times people find out about their relationship + 1 time no one does.

characters: michelle jones x peter parker, steve rogers, may parker, ned leeds, roger harrington, flash thompson, tony stark, sam wilson, bucky barnes, wanda maximoff

prompt: secret relationship (spideychelle week - day 1)

word count: 1,666

warnings: language, implicit sexual behavior

it all started with a kiss. their first kiss in general and as a couple. in their defense, ned had left them alone for way too long and they’re 16 year olds with raging hormones and a gigantic crush on each other.

they were on the roof of the avengers’ compound, looking at the few stars on the sky, a bit too cliché for michelle if you ask her, their hands were touching, peter put his hand on top of hers and she was mad.

“peter parker, if you kiss me right now, i’ll never forgive you.” so, obviously, that’s what he did. and she did forgive him, the many kisses they shared after that proved it.

that same night, they decided to keep that relationship a secret. with the whole spider-man thing, he didn’t think it was the safest for people to know.

of course, someone finds out the next morning.

see, the thing is, peter was never late for superhero stuff, so, steve rogers knocking on his door at 9 AM because he was late for the practice they had scheduled the night before wasn’t that weird.

his eyes still bleed whenever he remembers what he saw when he opened the door. michelle wasn’t a shy girl, like, at all. she was very confident in herself and her body. but steve finding their naked bodies tangled in each other wasn’t how any one of them wanted to start their morning.

the teens begged him not to tell everyone and he, more than anyone, understood what they felt. he promised he wouldn’t tell anyone and walked away. thankfully, he kept his word.

needless to say, they were way more careful since then.

II.

they had been dating for four long months and only steve knew. well, steve and this really nice lady who owned mj’s favorite book store.

as much as it was nice that people didn’t know, it also sucked because they couldn’t do any couple-like things in public, which had its good side, since michelle couldn’t keep her hands off him when they were alone. who knew she was so touchy.

they were on peter’s couch, may was at work and after was going to her friend’s house upstate and ned had a family dinner, meaning they had the apartment for themselves.

they were watching a random movie that was playing when they turned on the tv. that is until michelle started kissing his neck. she found a spot, worked on it until she felt it was red enough, then made her way up to his lips.

they were making out on the couch until they heard may’s voice, “peter? are you home? i forgot my bag and keys when i left for work this morning.” they immediately pulled back and peter’s eyes widened, pointing to his room and telling mj to hide. “peter?” she says again.

“u-uh, yeah! i’m here, may!” he makes sure michelle is there with the door locked before he goes open the door.

“took you long enough, i have to hurry, melissa is waiting for me downstairs.... what’s that on your neck, peter?” she says, with her bag already on her arm and her hands on her waist.

“uhh, it’s an a... a rash?” he stumbles over his words. “hm, sure it is. wear condoms. bye, peter. bye, michelle,” she yells. “may!” he says sheepishly, but she had already closed the door behind her.

when she got home on sunday and he asked her how she knew it was michelle, her answer was, “i didn’t, that was a guess. but now that you told me, what’s going on between you two?”

III.

it was hard keeping it a secret, but with ned it was the worst. he was with them almost 24/7 and mj had no idea how peter still hadn’t blabbed about it.

michelle was making her way to the library when she heard him behind her. she bit her lip and walked into the next empty alley she saw.

she heard him drop behind her and turned around, meeting his masked face.

“hi, spider-man,” she smiles and pulls his mask up so that she could kiss him.

“hey, babe,” he says when they pull away. “how many times do i have to tell you that pet names don’t work for us, loser?”

“sorry, m-“ “MJ?” they hear ned’s voice coming out from a pocket on the suit. “shit. h-hi, ned. what’s up?” peter grabs his phone looking apologetic.

“you two? how long?” ned said and it was michelle’s turn to stumble over her words, “u-uh, five... five months?”

“FIVE MONTHS?”

IV.

mister harrington decided that the decathlon team needed some “bonding time”. or “bullshit” in michelle’s words. so, before their weekly wednesday practice they went out to dinner (minus flash. they meticulously planned it so it’d happen the week he was traveling). mj really wasn’t having it.

as soon as they got there michelle yelped, “ow, mister harrington i just tripped and i think i twisted my ankle.” she was supporting all her weight on peter, who, surprisingly, understood her little act. “oh, yeah. i think she’ll have to head back. i’ll help her,” he said and picked her up.

“peter parker, put me down right now,” she said, under her breath, but keeping the fake look of pain on her face. “but-“ harrington started.

“bye! see you guys back at school,” peter said and started walking away.

when they got back at school they went straight to the auditorium. they put the tables and the stand in their places, which took them only 10 minutes with the whole “peter has super strength” thing.

michelle sat on top of one of the tables and peter stood in front of her, his hands on her hips.

“nice little act you did there,” he says, with what michelle calls his stupid smile on his face. “why, thank you.” his smile grows and she kisses it off his face.

the team wasn’t supposed to come back for another half hour, so you can imagine their faces when they’re interrupted by gasps and mister harrington yelling at everybody.

if you go to midtown high, then you’ve probably went to, or at least heard about, flash’s parties. a bunch of drunk teenagers in a huge house isn’t really a good idea, so that’s why it happened at least twice a month.

peter was never a big fan of parties, well, not since the bite, his senses got too overwhelmed, but michelle begged him to go, something about “people watching”. so, may dropped them off at 10 PM, giving her nephew money to call an uber.

the music could be heard houses away and, as expected, when they got inside half of the people were already drunk.

they grabbed a drink for themselves and hung out at the living room until michelle whispered something about it being “too boring” and grabbed her boyfriend’s hand and dragged him upstairs.

she opened the first unlocked door she found and kicked out a couple mid-kiss. “we’re gonna do better use of the room anyways,” she tells peter. “if i learned one thing from coming to all of these parties is that flash has every streaming service available on his tv.”

she jumps on the bed, peter following close behind and grabs the remote, “have you ever cried at a party?” “well, when i was-“ “that was a rhetorical question, we’re watching this is us.”

and yes, they did end up crying. and peter was terrified because michelle did not cry in any circumstances. so, he just pulled her closer and kissed her forehead. he truly was scared.

another episode started and neither of them said anything until halfway into the episode when mj paused it. “you saw me cry and you didn’t faint, i’m shocked.” he laughed, “i’m also shocked, to be honest.” she smiled and kissed him. which was the perfect moment for someone to burst through the door.

“MY EYES.” the person yelled, and they immediately recognized flash’s voice.

they were careful around everybody but the avengers. peter would make long calls in the kitchen first thing in the morning and they wouldn’t even bat an eye.

at this point, they wanted them to find out.

peter called her babe during their calls, no one said a thing. he’d be next to bucky and sam and would text her a bunch of hearts, nothing. one day, he showed up with a bunch of hickeys on his neck and no one mentioned it, which was absurd to peter.

later that day, he went up to steve “hey, do they not care that i’m dating someone or are they just dumb?” steve laughed, “kid, for superheroes, they can be very inattentive. but why not tell them if you want them to know so badly?”

that’s what he decides to do the next time he goes to the compound. tony was developing some sort of emergency protocol for his suit, something only may and ned could access.

they’re all at the kitchen when the couple gets there. peter pulls tony aside and asks, “hey, could you add michelle to the protocol? since we’re dating and all.” tony gasped, “dating?”

“remind me again why did i chose to tell the most dramatic of them.” peter says under his breath to michelle. her nervous smile grows and she answers tony, “yeah, we’re dating.”

sam is the next to hear it. “yo, bucky, did you hear this? the kid is dating the girl kid who always comes here.”

wanda, who’s next to bucky lifts up her head and smiles, “are you really?" “yeah,” mj chuckles.

peter smiles at the mess those grown ass adults were making because he was dating someone. he’d have to be ten times more careful now, but it felt good to have people knowing it.

mj squeezes his hand reassuringly and smiles. peter smiles back and kisses her cheek.

all was well.

#spideychelleweek2k19 #spideychelle fic #spideychelle #my writing #michelle jones #peter parker #spider man: far from home #mcu

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shippingtheswann · 5 years

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Answering the Call

A/N – this is my first ever One Shot. It is based off the prompt found on @bleebug Tumblr – Best friend CS AU where Emma butt-dials Killian when confiding in her friend(s) about her feelings for him, and he just sits there listening, confused and ecstatic and feeling like a jackass for eavesdropping, but mostly just relieved that his love isn’t unrequited like he’s believed for years. My story takes a little bit of a different route, but still has it all.

----------

His night wasn’t ending on a good note. There was no way after the day he had. He spent the last twelve hours preparing a presentation, and all he had to show for it was a slide that had his name and his professional information Killian Jones, COO, Jones INC. He was no where close to being ready for the conference next week. Normally, his brother Liam would be the one making the presentation. But, this time, Liam forced Killian to take on the job to impress potential investors and companies. He hated it. Public speaking wasn’t his strong suit – and neither was coming up with a way to make his company look good.

On top of that, he missed his weekly hang out with his friends. It had been a tradition that he looked forward to every week.

They would choose a new bar each week; trading off who was the designated driver (or the person who paid for the Uber) and who got to choose the location that week. You would think that after more than 5 years of weekly meetings, they would have run out of places to find – but each week, there was somewhere new within the hour drive of their universe.

Sure, Killian could normally tell what kind of bars he would be going to each week, simply based off his friend’s personalities – but he still enjoyed trying out new things. He especially enjoyed the company.

The past few weeks of bars had been an adventure to say the least. Mary Margaret and David had taken them to an 80’s themed pop up bar that had been opened and closed in quick succession. Ruby had decided on a biker bar out in the middle of nowhere that claimed to have the best moonshine. Regina took them up to Canada for her turn, opting for a special wine tasting at a place that looked like a castle. Trying to get 7 drunk Americans back into the country turned out to be easier than he expected. Graham had chosen another traditional sports bar.

Killian had been looking forward to this week. It was Emma’s turn.

Even though she wasn’t standing in front of him, his heart still skipped a beat when the thought of her.

Emma Swan was everything that Killian wanted but couldn’t have. She was untouchable. Not only was she too perfect for him – with her blonde hair and green eyes that brought just about every man she knew to his knees – but she had a dark sense of humor that Killian couldn’t get enough of. She was sarcastic half the time. She was the perfect drinking partner – never getting drunk enough to black out but keeping the pace with the men and showing them that she was just as much of a bad ass as they were. She was strong, yet gentle; loving but protected. She was perfect.

Ever since that night they met, Killian had been drawn to her; wanting to be around her every chance he got.

But, she was off limits. She was David’s adopted sister. She had been hurt in the past. She had walls sky high – and while Killian still worked on cracking those walls, he knew that nothing would ever come of it. David warned him the first night they met back in Freshman year. After another stupid frat party where Killian put on his best dashing rapscallion persona, David cornered him and told him to not mess with Emma.

They had grown up a lot in the last few years, but Killian knew it wasn’t enough to make Emma his, no matter how much he prayed for it to happen. And he knew that David wasn’t Emma’s keeper, that she could make her own decisions; but he respected David too much to cause any friction.

It was also worth remembering that Emma hadn’t once returned his affection.

As Killian walked through his apartment, in search of some much-needed aspirin, he remembered the last time that he brazenly flirted with Emma.

It was during their trip into Canada with Regina. They had all had too much to drink. When Regina said that she had paid her assistant to work extra hours and drive them home in the large van that she had rented, everyone pregamed in the van once they crossed the border. He could remember rolling his eyes when Regina had told them that they were traveling up in a rental van that night, but he couldn’t wait. He could remember pushing Graham out of the way to get to Emma’s side, not wanting anyone else to get all her attention. He remembered glass after glass of rum, even though Ruby was giving him a hard time about it being a vineyard. His hands, having developed a mind of their own, found Emma’s hair while they were sitting in a booth away from the crowd. As the night wore on, he got closer and closer to her, flirting a little bit more with each inch. Yet, she never reciprocated. She remained aloof. She was sweet and caring, but never crossed the line Killian was hoping she would. Her hands never traveled to him. They stayed firmly on her lap. The words that she whispered to him as he laid his head on her shoulder too tired to keep his eyes open as the van drove silently down the highway.

“You’re my best friend, I can’t”.

He had been placed in the friendzone – and he didn’t see himself ever leaving it. He wasn’t sure if he was supposed to hear those words or not, but the weight they carried finalized everything.

While that thought weighed heavy on his mind, he also knew that just having her in his life was better than nothing. If all she wanted from him was a friendship, then he was willing to be that for her. All he really wanted was for her to be in his life forever, for her to cast her glow upon his life for eternity. So even if she never loved him the way he loved her, he was OK with that.

And he did. He loved Emma Swan as deeply as one could love. Everything he did, he did with her in mind. He took the job at Liam’s company simply because he knew he would be able to afford to give Emma the life she deserved, even if it meant sacrificing what he loved to do, which was sail. There was no real job market in sailing, but Liam’s investment company made money and provided Killian with a safety net he knew Emma would need one day. He begged Liam to open a branch of the firm in Seattle, not wanting to be too far from his second family. He even purchased the apartment in hopes that one day he would share it with Emma. It was only a 10-minute walk to her job, and Killian abused that knowledge at times, randomly bumping into her on her lunch break or seeing her as she walked into the precinct in the mornings.

He popped the two pills and drank some water. It was nearing midnight and he was too tired to eat, even though the leftovers from dinner the night before were calling to him. He sat on his bed, his hands playing with his phone. He missed Emma, and the group. He missed their antics. They always ended up getting into trouble, even if they didn’t mean to. He wanted nothing more to just call Emma and talk to her. She always picked the best bars and he wanted to hear about everything that happened. His apartment was just too quiet.

He flipped the phone in his hands a few more times, then opened the screen and clicked on Emma’s name. He knew she would probably be asleep, but he just wanted to hear her voice, even if it was for only a few minutes. They hadn’t spoken at length since that night in Canada. Just a few casual conversations when they saw each other at last week’s bar hop. Graham hadn’t left Killian and David alone that night – there was a big game on that kept their attention on the screens.

The time that passed felt endless. The ringing of Emma’s phone kept his brain alert, while sending his body into shock at the same time. The nerves pulsing through his system would have been enough to kill just about anyone. After 4 rings, he didn’t think she would pick up and his heart sank. The feelings that washed over him were worse than the nerves that had been replaced. While he knew she probably wouldn’t answer, he got his hopes up again. Her voice came through the phone causing a slight smile to develop on his face. But, it was only her voicemail, telling the caller to leave her a message or to text her like a normal human.

“Hello Love, I was just calling to see how the night went. I missed you all, but Liam was insistent that I finish the presentation. Call me when you get a minute, or you know, text me. Either one. You know that I worry you didn’t make it home ok,” he said with a laugh, referencing his weird motherly concern, as Ruby called it, “I haven’t talked to you in a while and I just wanted to catch up. Well… have a good night Swan and hopefully I will talk to you soon”.

He hung up with a sigh.

He threw himself rather dramatically onto the bed. His arm came to wrap around his head, sheltering his eyes from the beaming light on his ceiling.

Just as his thoughts started to drift towards the deep end, where he would wallow in self pity thinking that he ruined his friendship with Emma that fateful weekend, his phone rang in his hands.

She appeared on the screen, all bright and beautiful. It was a picture Killian had taken of her one weekend the group traveled down to San Diego. She was sitting on the beach, the ocean sparkling in the background. The strings of her bikini poking out from her red coverup. The large straw hat she wore to block out the sun bent back. Her smile was contagious, as she had just finished laughing at something Mary Margaret had said. He cursed himself for ever making that picture her caller ID. He wanted to stare at it more than talk to her.

He forced himself to answer the call.

“Good evening Love,” he started, waiting to hear her angelic voice answer him back.

He could hear mumbling, but no one spoke directly to him. There was laughter in the background.

“Emma,” he said, a bit louder than normal.

Still, no one answered. There was some scratching on the phone, and then things came in a bit clearer.

Ruby’s unique laughter came through the phone. He could hear Mary Margaret shushing everyone else. Regina’s voice then came in. He was able to hear the words out of her mouth, but something was muffling the noise.

“Come on Emma, Truth or Dare?” Regina said.

He could hear more giggling, then the woman he loved said “Truth”.

It finally dawned on him that Emma must have butt dialed him. Emma’s iPhone had been known to do that a few times. It was so old, and she refused to upgrade it even though her plan allowed her to. Yet, Emma kept the beat-up thing that took nothing more than any piece of fabric touching it to unlock it. A few times, she had accidently dialed her Captain when she was putting her phone in her pocket. He laughed to himself before yelling her name one last time.

“Emma” he screamed into the phone.

No reply.

As he moved the phone away from his face, about to hang up the call, he heard something that had him pulling the phone back towards his ear.

“Alright, tell us how you really feel about Killian,” Regina

He felt wrong to listen, but something in him needed to know what Emma felt.

There was a round of laughter as the girls were probably getting settled to hear Emma’s confession. He could imagine them. Regina was probably sitting in a chair, her icy eyes focused on Emma. Mary Margaret was probably on the floor, trying to contain her excitement. Ruby was probably lying down, taking up the whole couch of whoever’s apartment they were at. It was Emma that he had troubles imagining.

Was she smiling as Regina asked the question? Did her heart start to skip at beat at the mention of his name, the way it did for him? Were her cheeks flushed because of thoughts of him?

“Killian’s my best friend,” Emma said, muffled by her pocket. He could hear a smile in her voice.

“Come on Swan, there is more to that – tell us how you really feel about Killian,” Regina said, this time a bit more forceful than before.

He heard a sigh and he felt his heart completely stop; the breath caught in his chest.

“Oh, fuck it,” she started, her voice coming in a bit clearer, “I love the man. OK! I love him. I’ve loved him for years.”

He almost dropped the phone. Everything that was happening suddenly stopped – time stood still. Emma Swan loved him. The woman he loved, that he would go to the ends of time and space for loved him back. He heard the words straight from her mouth. Yet, the words didn’t sound exciting and promising. They sounded sad. It was if a knife was slowly cutting out his heart. She loved him, but clearly that love wasn’t enough.

“But I’m scared OK. I’m scared of what loving him might mean,” she concluded.

“What do you mean?” Ruby asked.

“Remember when we all went to that bar Regina found a few weeks ago,” she paused, probably waiting for her friends to nod their understanding, “Killian was being just so… Killian. He was the perfect gentleman and the whole night, I just imagined what being with him would be like. We aren’t even dating, but he was constantly touching me, throwing attention my way. What would that be like if we were actually together? Then, in the van, he put his head on my shoulder, and suddenly, my feelings smacked me right in the face. And then I got scared. He is my best friend – what would happen if I lose him? What would happen if I lose our friendship? I couldn’t live with that. The last few weeks, with us barley talking because I got scared of my feelings, has been so rough. All I’ve wanted to do is talk to him, be near him; it’s been torture.”

Killian let a breath out. A thousand things were running through his mind. How could he be so blind to what Emma was going through? How could he get her to change her mind and be with him? He needed to make her see that no matter what, they would be OK. She needed to understand that he would never do anything to hurt her, that he would spend eternity making sure that what they used to have will always be there, as a strong foundation to what they were going to have.

“Oh Emma,” Mary Margaret’s soothing voice echoed in his ear, “You can never be sure what is going to happen, but you can’t live your life surrounded by fear. Fear is natural and serves a purpose, but you can’t let it control your happiness. Love, true love, the love that I know you have for Killian and he has for you, is worth the risk of anything that may happen.”

“You really think he loves me?” her voice was barely audible.

“Of course, he does!” he heard Ruby yell.

“The man isn’t the brightest, but he isn’t a dumbass, of course he loves you,” Regina quipped.

Killian rolled his eyes at the words, but she was right – he did love her.

“What should I do?” Emma questioned.

“You tell him, you tell him everything. Be honest with him. Tell him you are scared. Tell him you don’t want to lose his friendship. But start with telling him you love him,” Mary Margaret told him.

He could hear shuffling, movement of fabric over the phone. Then, everything got very clear.

“Oh shit,” he heard Emma whisper, her voice louder than it had been before.

Suddenly, her face appeared on his phone. She must have turned on her FaceTime app.

“Well hello there love,” he smiled, not hiding the cocky grin that was now splashed across his face.

“How much of that did you hear?” She asked, her cheeks reddening.

“Enough to tell you that I love you too,” he said.

Maybe the night was going to end on a good note.

#One shot #CS #Captain Swan #captain swan fanfiction #Captain swan one shot #Captain Swan OS #Captain Swan FF #CSFF #fanfiction

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southboundhq · 5 years

Photo

MEET KITTY,

FULL NAME › Katherine “Kitty” Elizabeth Briar AGE › twenty two GENDER › Cis female (She/Her/Hers) FROM › Boot Hill, Arizona RESIDENCE › Villas Adobes community (Downtown) OCCUPATION › employee of the Painted Sky Boutique NOW PLAYING › You Don’t Own Me by Lesley Gore

BIOGRAPHY,

trigger/content warnings: adultery, substance abuse, alcohol abuse

Kitty was her mother’s last and most grand attempt to keep him. This was her final display of her true love and devotion, pulling out all of the stops, but it was still not enough. If there was one thing that a man hated the most it was when his mistress didn’t know when to give it up. Lorelai Briar was a pitiable creature; one who thought herself untouchable in the arms of a powerful man. He’d held her at night and forged promises of forever from temple kisses and extravagant gifts while he had his fill of her. Lorelai never imagined that he would discard her and return to his wife, but all flames of petty desire are doused by reality sooner or later. What use does a man with four children have for yet another child born of a fleeting affair? Lorelai was never meant to be anything more than a fun escape from the band of gold which shackled him to his wife’s doorstep. Love and children have no place in a formula so temporary, and so he decided that it was over. In the end, Lorelai held him tightly in her arms and whispered sweet words that were meant to sound delectable upon the eardrum, and he left all the same. It didn’t take Lorelai very long to realize what a terrible mistake she made by getting pregnant, but some mistakes are much too strong to remedy with a few crocodile tears. She lost him, and now she would be stuck with the memory of him everyday. Lorelai would lie awake at night, hands clutching her swollen stomach and praying that her daughter would be different than herself; than her father.

Lorelai tried to love her daughter. She held Kitty in her arms and rocked her like a loving mother should. She fed Kitty and did her best to provide for them two of them on her own. Blue eyes lined with a thicket of dark lashes would flutter like the wings of a monarch butterfly as Kitty looked up at her, but it did little to soften the disgust she felt whenever she thought about her father. In truth, his departure spoiled any good relations that Kitty might have had with her mother, and the chasm that stood between mother and daughter only deepened as the years went by. Everyday, Kitty would ask her mother to tell her about her father, and everyday her mother ignored her. “He was scum, Kitty. He ruined me, he ruined us. You should be thankful that you didn’t turn out like him.” Little did Lorelai know that Kitty had acquired all the worst parts of both adulterers even though she had only been exposed to one of them. She wore her father’s manipulative tendencies and her mother’s coquettish ways like a silk scarf, and naturally, it horrified her mother. There were no heart to heart conversations about boys, makeup, and school to be had between the two of them. From Lorelai’s affair spawned an even more dangerous entity than she hadn’t anticipated. Kitty was her mother’s most grand mistake, and seeing her face reminded her of that everyday.

When Kitty entered the ninth grade, Lorelai remarried. “This is the one,” she said, “This is the one we need.” Kitty broke out in a fit of laughter, causing her mother’s smile to melt into a scowl. There had never been a ‘we’ between them, only you and I like two spiders in a mason jar. This marriage was what Lorelai needed, not Kitty. It was just as sudden and ridiculous as her affair with Kitty’s father, and it showed that Kitty’s mother learned nothing from her past choices. Paul Edwards was everything that Lorelai had been looking for in a man; Tall, single and a bank account that would take years to empty. It wasn’t love that reflected in Lorelai’s green eyes, but twin dollar signs that grew larger by the day. Kitty hated the man with his toothy smile and the way he tried to insert himself into their already shattered dynamic. Within a blink of an eye, their little two bedroom house in Midtown turned into a four bedroom home in Villas Adobes. Kitty tolerated him largely due to the money he would give her in an attempt to buy her love. It turns out that love in the Edwards house looked a lot like diamond earrings. Paul and Lorelai’s whirlwind relationship led to another pregnancy, and finally Lorelai got it right. Now, she had the well-off husband and baby boy that she had been wanting for so long. The only problem was that there was little room for a Briar in the Edwards household.

Lorelai got her happily ever after, but Kitty still only knew half of herself. She once thought that she would drown in all of her questions about her father, but she started to ask less and less as she grew older. She could hear her mother’s words ringing in her ears, “You can’t miss something you never had, Kitty”. So, she took her mother’s words in stride and put him out of her mind. Much of Kitty’s adolescence was spent sneaking out of her house at night and sneaking back in just before the sun came up. Truthfully, all she had to do was walk right out of the front door since her mother and stepfather were so focused on themselves and her darling little brother, Wesley, to care about what Kitty was up to. It was then that Kitty discovered that she could get away with almost anything when her mother and stepfather’s eyes were permanently focused elsewhere.

It didn’t take long for her to meet other girls who were just as reckless as she was and would rather be anywhere else than stuck at home. They weren’t nice girls, and neither was she for that matter, but perpetual boredom was the common ground each of them could bond over. And so The five were formed, all daughters of difficult parents, constantly hungry for more of everything. They became her home away from home as they traveled the streets at night, leaving boys and girl alike spellbound with a single touch. Together, they chewed away at the town like powdery pink bubblegum and spat it back out through red lacquered lips. No party worth attending in little o’l Boothill was complete without Pretty Kitty and her circle of devils to get it started. Sunny afternoons were spent secretly chugging expensive bottles of champagne from her stepfather’s gilded cabinets while her more adventurous friends dabbled in little baggies of snow-white powder. Kitty, of course, sampled the drugs here and there whenever she really wanted to escape the made up paradise that her mother was trying to maintain.

It was only when Kitty graduated that she realized just how aimless she truly was. There were no bold dreams of leaving Boothill and going to college or becoming more than she already was. Sure, Boothill was about as exciting as watching paint dry but it was home. A regular C- student, she hadn’t given her studies any real attention. “Katherine has so much potential, Mrs. Edwards,” her teachers would say and her mother would proceed with feigning interest in her daughters education. “but she just doesn’t push herself. We’re worried that she isn’t being challenged enough”. Kitty did enough to get by and that’s how she liked it. Chances to sneak out with her friends to go to some party always took precedence over her studies, and neither her mother nor her stepfather bothered to hassle her about it. They did, however force her to start working. “You have to find something, Kitty. You don’t expect to live off of Paul for the rest of your life, do you?” Would bleeding Paul dry of his money truly be a bad thing? Wasn’t that exactly her what her mother was doing anyway? Nevertheless, the weekly allowances ended almost immediately and she found an open position at The Painted Sky Boutique. She’d spent almost all of her allowance there every week that it was only right that she fill out an application.

Four years after her graduation and much of Kitty’s life is still the same. Same circle of girls armed with fangs too sharp for human skin, same oblivious, perpetually uninvolved mother and stepfather, and the same wasted potential. Every paycheck earned from the boutique is still being used to fund her booze and drug filled weekends with the exception of a few dollars saved here and there to finally move out of her stepfather’s house. Whenever she passes her old teachers on the street or when they come into the boutique, they always give her that watered down look of disappointment. “Don’t give up hope, Katherine. This won’t always be your life.” She only smirks. It’s not the ideal life, but it’s hers. She has no use for their pity because she is not their failure, and she is not her mother’s mistake.

❝ when you are young, and beautiful, you can be very cruel. ❞

CENSUS,

FACECLAIM › Kristine Froseth AUTHOR › Jay

#kristine froseth #rp #rpg #town rp #new rp #bio rp #{ all. }#{ f. }#{ local. }#{ over twenty. }#{ jay. }#substance abuse tw #alcohol abuse tw

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metaphoricallyroger · 6 years

Text

She Is My Love

Summary: Transitory moments of a relationship.

Words: 2,058.

Warning: Mentions of sex.

Note: Title taken from ‘She Makes Me (Stormtrooper in Stilettos)’ by Queen

You didn’t consider your relationship with Roger something that would last longer than the one recording session he had invited you to when Queen was in the process of creating ‘Sheer Heart Attack’.

What had started out as not even a one-night-stand (a quickie in his car) a month before the conception of the album ended up becoming monthly, then fortnightly, then weekly.

Soon after you became a part of the entourage that followed Queen around to their parties and gigs. It wasn’t something you had planned on, unlike some of the other women you had met, it just seemed to fit at that point in your life.

You and Roger had never spoken about what type of relationship you had, it was a silent agreement that neither of you was ready to commit to a single person. You were both still ‘sowing your wild oats’ as it were.

Your understanding of the friendship was that if he couldn’t find a woman who interested him enough, he would come to you. It didn’t offend you because you would do the same, but your flings weren’t found around Roger, whereas his were usually tag-a-longs for the night or waiting outside the venue.

There was no linear narrative for the progression of your relationship, it was just a march of small fragments, inconsequential moments that you didn’t care to mention to each other. These moments became more significant to each other than you could have thought and led to an enduring partnership.

You hadn’t seen Roger since the band had travelled to Wales to record their latest album, which had gone three weeks over schedule. You were lucky enough to have been given time off of work when someone you worked with had called and begged you to take their shift the following day in exchange for yours.

After not seeing Roger for a month, you had had time to reflect on the current status of your not-relationship. The idea of wanting something more had scared you, and you thought it would petrify him.

His bed you were both splayed across provided comfort and something for your eyes to focus on when you approached the subject of relationships, the duvets geometric pattern helped to avoid eye contact.

“What are we doing here, Roger?” You adjusted yourself so you sat straight on Roger’s thighs.

“Well,” he paused mouthing at your neck, “I’ve currently got my hand up your skirt so you tell me. Why do you want to have a conversation when we could be doing much more interesting things with our mouths?”

“You said to me that I’m the only person you’ve slept with regularly.” You paused and tried to gather your thoughts.

“I’d like, only if you want, to be the only person you sleep with. If you don’t want to, that’s fine too.” The dejected tone of voice that you tried to hide did not go unnoticed by Roger who had, for once, been incredibly attuned to your feelings.

“I thought you said you ‘didn’t want to do labels’.”

You winced before replying; “I’ve changed my mind. Look, if you don’t want to do labels, I can’t make you, but I don’t think we should continue to do this if it’s going to hurt you or me in the end.”

“What made you change?” You sighed and climbed off of Roger’s lap and sat on the bed next to him.

“I see you with all these women and it hurts, it really hurts. You don’t see me ever with anyone because I don’t meet them at parties. I don’t know if you ever seeing me with anyone would hurt you the way it does me, but it makes me extremely jealous and miserable.”

“If I’d have known it made you feel that way I would’ve-”

“Would’ve what? Stopped? I can’t ask you to stop doing something you enjoy for me, they’re just feelings anyway.”

“I do enjoy it, but they’re your feelings.”

You raised your eyebrows, jaw hinged open from shock.

“I care about you a lot, Y/N, more than I ever have about another girl.”

“What about your mother?” You nudged his side and beamed.

“Don’t tell her that I said that.”

“Already gearing me up to meet the parents are we, Taylor?”

He brought his lips to yours and sealed the silent promise you had made to each other. You pushed him onto his back and climbed over him, continuing where you left off.

“Do you miss me?”

You hummed noncommittally.

“C’mon love, you don’t miss me at all? Because I miss you.”

“How can you miss me when you nicked all of the visuals of the last time we saw each other and stowed them away in your bag?”

Queen had embarked on a tour after recording ‘A Night at the Opera’, which meant you wouldn’t get to see Roger as much as you had when the band recorded in studios that were easily accessed.

Time on the phone was precious and limited. Queen ran on practically no money, and whenever the bus paused to refill its tanks, he would call you from a payphone, which meant your time often cut out before you both got to say what you really wanted to.

The words you both wanted to say were better kept in the privacy of a hotel room, curtains drawn, those conversations were just between the two of you, and most often occurred after shows when Roger still ran on adrenaline. If he called before a show it would be because he was nervous and your running rhetoric about your day would allow him to focus on something else.

“We’ll just have to take more when I get back for your own collection.”

You were lucky enough to have been able to go to all of the Hammersmith Odeon performances and spend Christmas and the New Year with the band after their final UK performance.

“I don’t get to see you for three months, I might have changed since then.”

“Well, we’ll just have to take more pictures for the both of us then, won’t we?”

Your hand slid into your trousers at that point, and you allowed pleasure to take over as your neck arched at Roger’s honeyed tone.

“Loyalty is so important, don’t you think, Y/N?”

Those words uttered by Freddie had left you contemplative and pale throughout the car ride home, and you left Roger alone the moment the car had come to a halt outside the garage.

You trudged into the second living room, not bothering to leave your shoes neatly, instead, you left them in the doorway for Roger to trip over. You may have been thirty but you weren’t above young adult pettiness.

The carpet was lumpy beneath your feet, much like the one that took residence in your throat. You didn’t need to turn to the curved doorway to know Roger had rested his elbow against the side as he often did.

When the pair of you argued, which wasn’t often, it was here that they took place. The room was unused and in the darkest part of the house, which reflected your acrid moods in those situations.

“Did you cheat on me?” You didn’t need to look at him. You would be able to tell from the tone of his voice whether he was lying or not.

“Why would you ask something like that?”

“It’s not a far-fetched idea, after all,” you quipped, “You’re you.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

“I’m sorry, have we not known each other for six years?”

At his glazed look, you scoffed and continued.

“I know your old reputation, it isn’t that hard to infer from what Freddie said.”

“Freddie was drunk and off his face on whatever that twat probably gave him!” The archway squeaked as he pushed himself into the room.

“Go and fuck other women for all I care, I could go and fuck other men and women too if I want!”

He had the audacity to laugh, “Sweetheart you wouldn’t go fuck other people if they fell at your feet.”

“No, you’re right, I wouldn’t, but I could if I wanted too and that point still stands.” You stomped your foot for flare which didn’t do much because of the carpet.

You were ready to leave him to wallow in his own thoughts for the remainder of his time off tour, but you had a point to make.

“I cannot believe I thought this relationship would work, how could I have been so stupid?” You muttered this mostly to yourself.

“What was that?”

“I said, I can’t believe I thought this relationship would work.”

“Stop being so dramatic Y/N!”

“I’m not being dramatic, I need to have the higher ground in this situation because you’re taller than me and I can’t get my point across!” You had climbed on top of the coffee table so you were able to look down at him with your lowered brow.

“Now I get it, you’re not being dramatic, you’re being ridiculous.”

“I’m not being ridiculous, Roger, I’m pregnant!”

“You’re pregnant?”

“Yes? Wow, I didn’t know that. Where did that come from?”

“I don’t know, you’re the one who said it!”

“I’ve not been feeling great and I’ve been off my food. Plus, I may have been to the doctors the other day.”

“What do you mean, ‘may have’?”

“I asked for a letter and I didn’t look at what it said.”

“Why wouldn’t you want to know?!”

“Don’t yell at me, I got nervous! I didn’t want to look at it without you!”

“You’re yelling at me too!” He yelled back quieter than you had expected.

“What did you do with the note?” He sat on the lounge in front of you and gnawed at his lower lip.

“It’s in my underwear drawer.”

You stepped off the table and retrieved the letter from your drawers, returned to the room and watched Roger for a moment, who was certainly calmer than you thought to give him credit for.

“You can do it.” You handed him the letter and sat next to him, clammy palm gripping his knee.

“Did you really not want to find out without me?”

“Despite what I said in the heat of the moment, I do see this relationship lasting. You’re the kid’s father after all, even if you are getting old.” You grinned lightheartedly and twisted your wedding ring.

“I am not old at all, I’m spiritually younger than you.”

“Sorry, was that another way of saying ‘immature’?”

Ignoring your dig, he ripped open the envelope and with darting eyes, began to read.

“Well, looks like I’m still going strong, despite my age.”

He leant back with his hands behind his head and his feet kicked up on the coffee table.

“I’m pregnant?” You both looked at each other with wide eyes before you both smiled.

“We’re going to be parents.” The hug you shared was sparked by Roger’s sentence and contained a sense of partnership that was strengthened with the promise of new life.

“We need to board this room up I swear,” You panted as you lay on your back next to Roger, his warm arm around your neck.

“I don’t know, I’d say it’s a pretty good room.”

“You only say that because you’re essentially guaranteed to get laid every time we solve our fights in this room.” You placed a kiss against his sweaty chest as he ran his hand across your stomach which sent a jubilant tingle up your spine.

“I’m sure I’m guaranteed to get laid a lot of the time, love. Especially if we’re celebrating.”

“You still haven’t given me an answer.”

“No. I did not cheat on you. I will never cheat on you.”

“Why would he say something like that?”

“Freddie? Who knows why he does anything. I did call Prenter his pet, maybe that’s why.” He rolled his eyes.

“You do know that if you ever cheat on me I will destroy your car and your drum kit, right? And I don’t know much about either of those things so they’ll probably be reduced to dust.”

His thumb lifted your chin and he brought his lips to yours in a soft peck.

“I wouldn’t put it past you.”

#roger taylor imagine #roger taylor x reader #ben hardy imagine #ben hardy x reader #bohemian rhapsody imagine

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ecmlol · 5 years

Text

“Ok that works. You don’t have too even see him now”jude say

“ why don’t we just talk to him”noah says

“ you know what Oscar said he’s upset and he runs. Confronting him isn’t going to help the situation.”

“ what if I befriend him.”Noah asked

“ how?”jude asked

“ just lunch talking I can act like I don’t know who he is”

“ if the opportunity happens then ok but please don’t search him out.He’s not a story to chase he my brother that has mental issues “

“ I know jude but he’s your brother not a wild animal.”noah say

“ but he acts like one”jude says

Noah is getting frustrated with Jude because he feels like jude can benefit from having a relationship with his brother. Who knows maybe jude can help his brother deal with the revelation for having a twin.

“ maybe he needs a little compassion in his life jude . He was raised by Oscar. Maybe that’s all he needs.”noah say

It’s not often Jude thinks Noah is delusional or naive. This is one of those time.

“ noah I have a bad feeling about him.”

“ how bad can he be he’s your twin.”

“ he was raised by Oscar and he killed my moms dog!”jude say.

“ ok ok I get it . I just want us to have as much family in our life as we can. We both have been with out it for a while .

“I understand where this is going noah I do but I don’t think he needs to be apart of our support system if we even need one at this rate.”jude say

“ do you think Pax would man up and actually take the baby and raise it alone.”noah say

“ I don’t know but if you want to chase something like a story dig around in pax’s background.”

“ then what”

“ get a feel for him we already know he isn’t loyal and he has had some money issue” W.W.O.D. What would Oscar do. Jude thought to himself. Jude knows this is a dangerous road to travel down but day by day jude is growing to love the idea of a family with Noah.At first he thought that he could never have all of his dreams come true . There is no way he would ever be that lucky. Meet Noah and getting the devils he has figured out that he can have everything : Devils,a husband,and a family.

“ what do you know that I don’t “noah asked

“ the commissioners wife paid Pax to sleep with her .”

“Gigalowe! Are you serious he’s that bad at money management that he blow all of his money and had to sell his dick to make ends meeting?!!

“ please don’t ever make that a headline.”Jude say

“ I won’t. I promise but if I did it would be great”

“ thank you. We really don’t need those kind of headlines”jude says

“True”noah is starting to see that his marriage is going to mess with career. Noah has a lot of soul searching when it concern his career and how he’s going to handle it.He feels like he has to choice between a happy home life or his career. He know which one he will choice everytime. Jude. Period. The life he’s building with Jude means everything to Noah. The devils are as much of his concern as Jude’s.

The rest of the trip noah sat back and watched the sky line fly by.

At the arena

Brandon feels lost like a child sitting in the security office at the mall.Brandon has no clue how he got to the arena or what happened to his wallet. The last thing he remembers is being in Florida sitting in a rental car across from his mother’s house watching his sister play. His busted lips gave him a clue to where his things might be at. Snow the officer of duty at the moment walks in with a glass of water and a monster.

“ your father just called and he’s sending a car to come pick you up.” The sammy Davis jr look alike say

Brandon doesn’t have a clue what his game play is but he needed to regroup.

15 minutes later

Jude and Noah drive up to the arena and see a town car sitting out front.

“ do you think that’s car is for my brother?” Jude ask as he turns to park in the back.

“ stop “noah say

“ what?!jude stops in a rush luckly Porsche have great breaks Jude thought to himself.

Noah looks over and watches “jude”walk down from the top of the stairs .

Noah double takes looking at Jude then Brandon

“Holy shit “ noah say

Jude cranks his head to take a look.

“ I can’t see”jude says

“ from here I don’t think I can tell you two apart.”

“ well you really need to figure something out.”jude says in a worried tone.

Jude’s tone makes noah look at him.

“ I’ll come up with something I promise you Dane.”noah says as he leans in and gives him a quick kiss on jude pouted lips.

Noah and Jude have question written down and Put in the safe. The only person who knows the combination is noah.Noah tooks pictures of every scare birthmark and oddities on Jude’s body. They also are keeping those pictures on a disk in the safe.

Hotel

As soon as Brandon gets into his hotel room his phone rings.

Brandon already know who it is.

“ Father ?”

“ Brandon? are you ok?” Oscar asked

“I blacked out again”Brandon says

“ it’s ok come home and speaking to your therapist “

“ I can’t I’m this close to meeting him”

“ if that’s the case then why don’t you just walk up to jude and talk to him”oscar suggest

“ you know I can’t do that what if he doesn’t like me”Brandon say

“ Brandon I’m coming to get you. I’ll be in la....”

“ give me a month I’ll work up the nerves to talk to him I promise father “Brandon says in a small voice.

“ you’ll be on your best behavior? No more dead dogs?”

“ it was a accident I just wanted a closer look I didn’t know more then one sleeping pill will kill a dog!” Brandon voice changes into something more angry

“Kyle?”

“Yes!”

“ we can talk about this when my son wants to talk.”oscar says before hanging up.

At the arena

Jude is showing his personal security guard around . She wanted to see all of the exits in case of emergency. She is what he imagined Noah’s sister would look like. She almost 6’1 medium complex long legs and dark eyes but that’s where the similarities end. She has dark brown hair not black and she’s curvy like a real plus size model.jude thought

“ sir would you happen to have a list of places you frequent on a regular bases?” Officer Murray ask

“ of course “ jude writes down every place he can think of at the moment that he might go to.

There a knock on the door.Jude and Murray look up at the same time.

Noah and loinel walk in.

“ hey.”noah say as he wave to jude and walks over to Murray.

“This is my husband noah and my hag and Noah’s boss Lionel Davenport.”jude says

“ hi nice to meet you.”Murray say as she shakes both of their hands.

“ when ever I’m with either one of them you can take a break”jude say

“ all right. That works. I’ll go walk around and get comfortable with the building?”

“ sure that works be back in a hour.”jude says

Murray nods and disappears out the door.

“ ok what going on?”lionel demands as she sits down and gets comfortable.

Jude and Noah lean against Jude’s desk looking at lionel.

“Well I have a unstable twin brother that lives in New York that went to the same school as Eve”jude says

“A brother? Of course he’s unstable .Hello I was the man wife and never felt more unstable in my life.That awful. So what’s with the bodyguard.”

“ that where the unstable part come in “ noah say as he crosses his arm.

“ he has a split personality. I think I might be in danger of him trying to replace me.”jude says

“ ok I need a drink. “ Lionel gets up and head to the door.

Jude and Noah both look at each other and shrug.

They follow lionel out.

A few hours later noah and jude are walking into the house.

“ so tell me about officer Murray? Do you think she’s a good fit?”

“ so far I like her . She’s on time. She seems like she thinks outside the box.”jude says as he opens the refrigerator and grabs two beers

“Want a beer”jude ask noah who is leaning against the kitchen counter.

“ nah I think I’m good but I will take a water.”jude tosses noah a bottle of water.

“ thanks”

They walk out into the living room.

“ feel like Netflix and chill”noah asked as he sits down.”

“In bed yes.” Jude says as he heads toward the bedroom.

“ bedroom it is then.”

By the time noah gets into the bedroom after a pit stop in the bathroom jude is half naked.

Noah starts to strip. Noah notices that Jude’s shoulders are down and he keeps rubbing the back of his neck.

“ Dane? “

“ huh?” Jude looks over to noah who is pulling off his shoe in his closet.

“ sit on the bed for me”

“ ah ok” jude sits on the bed.

Noah sits on the other side and swings his legs over and the scoots over to sit behind Jude.

Noah starts to massage Jude’s shoulders.

“ god that feels so good.”jude sighs and rotates his neck.

�� good. So knowing Brandon is here really has you stressed out huh.”

“That obvious huh.”

“ I watch you all the time I can see it all over your face and in the way you move.”noah says

“ when you say things like that I worry a little less about you not knowing if it’s the real me.”

“ look at me.”noah says

Noah scoots back to make room on the bed for jude to turn and look at noah.

“ Jude you’re my best friend my husband and my world. We will get through this and anything else that gets thrown at us.”

Jude nods and leans into Noah.

Noah kisses Jude’s shoulders then the side of his head.

“ I missed us today”jude says

“ I missed our bubble too.”noah says

“ I guess we are back to reality “jude says

Jude sighs. Noah leans back and does a sloppy flip off the bed.

“ let’s go and be in our bubble in the shower.”noah says.

Jude smiles and follows noah into the bathroom.

The week goes quickly for both Noah and Jude. Neither one have seen or heard a peep out of Brandon. Noah has called and checked on Jamie everyday. There hasn’t been a sighting of Pax either. Was it the quiet before the storm jude thought at the weekly dinner that jude made himself.

On the menu this week : Mac and cheese, salads and grilled shrimp.

“ so how is it?”jude asked after he pushes the storm questions out of his head.

“ well shrimp is a little tough and the Mac and cheese could have baked a little older but besides that great job Dane.”noah says with a little sarcasm and a wink.

“ hey don’t blame me for the shrimp I’m not the one that cornered my husband and kissed him for like 5 minutes.”jude says

“ well ok. I can’t help myself you are just so irresistible when you cook and your wearing one of my wife beaters.” Noah said

Jude smiles and touches the love bite on his neck then rolls his eyes.

“ I’m kidding about the Mac and cheese it’s good by the way. So I found my baseball gear today while I was unpacking . Any chance you want to hit the batting cage or play catch after dinner?”noah asked

“ sure. Did you pick up my suit any chance?”jude asked.

“ no did you ask me to? Did I for get to pick it?”Noah asked.

“ no no I went to pick it up today after work and they said it was all ready picked up.”jude say

“ oh . Do you think they lost it?”noah asked

“ no I don’t Think they did. I have never had a problem with them before.”

“ do you think....”

“ my brother took them?”

“Yes anything possible jude . We know he’s in town”

“Great.”jude shakes his he and rubs the back of his neck “

“ ok take a breath and tell me which suit it was”

“ the brown one and I can’t remember the other one.”

“Ok the one I hate and a nother one got it.”

“ huh you hate the brown one ?”

“Yeah I should have rip it off you when I had a chance “

“ oh ok just remember the next time you see it i won’t be me wearing it.let me get it back before you do that. While we are on the subject of clothing. The next time I see you wearing underwear with holes I’m ripping them off you.”jude says with a smile.

“ is that a threat or a promise?”noah asked as he watches jude walk into the kitchen for a glass of water.

“ promise and I’m hiding those “ swim suit” too” jude says

“ I was wondering what happened to them.”

“ I hid them just before making dinner last weekend .”

“ oh so what do I have to do to get them back?” Noah says in his most seductive tone.

“Hummm I have to think about it”jude says teasingly.

“ I’m up for a challenge.”noah say

“Good because Im going to think of something good”

Noah gets a text. Noah’s face goes from flirty husband to worried.

“ noah everything ok?”

“She going to the hospital “noah say

“ what’s wrong” jude asked

“ not sure she said she feels off like something is wrong with the baby” noah say as he gets up and starts to walk away from the table.

Jude watches as noah grabs his shoes.

“ I’ll be back I want to check on them.”noah say

“ ok I’ll be here hanging out.” Jude say

Noah comes back and kisses jude before leaving.

“ love you” noah says on his way out.

Noah was so fast Jude’s response was only heard by his own ears.

“ love you .... too”

Two hours later jude receives a text from noah saying that it was just Braxton Hicks.

Jude didn’t really know what that means.

For the rest of the evening jude does some serious soul searching about the baby. Jude is thinking about everything noah has dug up on Pax this week. Pax’s brother was a baller that died in a car accident just before his first season in the league. His mother was never married and is a registered nurse. Pax didn’t make it through college. He flunked out just before the draft. Jude didn’t want to know how noah found out that pax is selling signed jersey online or that pax is in so much debt it’s ridiculous.

Jude thought to himself that noah has put so much time , money and heart into this baby that he know he’s not giving up on it no matter how much Jude has warned him about it. A part of jude is afraid that there is no way the universe is going to give him everything he has ever wanted in his life.Jude’s gut feeling is that he and noah are going to be heart broken by the end of the year.

Jude sigh and he gives up on trying to talk Noah out of this baby.

Jude picks up his phone and goes on to amazon to look up books on pregnancy and child birth.

Three hours later.

Jude has fallen asleep on the couch reading his new book. Noah walks in hoping that jude is awake because he has some news that he is dying to tell him.

Noah see jude on the couch with his phone in his hand.

Hummm I wonder if he was waiting up for me and fell asleep checking his emails.noah thought to himself

Noah takes Jude’s phone out of his hand and places it on the coffee table.

Jude starts to stir.

“ hey I’m home”noah say with a gentle shake.

“ what time is it “ jude say as he slowly opens his eyes.

Noah checks Jude’s phone.

“ 1245”

Jude rotates his head and stretches.

“ is everything ok still?”

“ yeah it’s great ! I have some news!” Noah is beyond giddy. He’s practically bouncing on the coffee table.

“Give me a second to wake up noah.” Jude say half a sleep.

Apart of jude wants to act like he is about to fall asleep but he doesn’t.

“ ok so what’s..”

Noah is smiling from ear to ear as he bites his bottom lip as he tries to contain his excitement.

“ it’s a girl!”Noah say as he grabs jude and hugs him.

“ seriously?!!”

“Yes I have pictures!”noah says with a smile.

“ sonagraphs you mean?”jude say

“ look at you using pregnancy terms”noah say as he takes the sonagram picture from his jacket pocket to hand to Jude.

“ if your wondering how I knew that I have decided to stop fighting you when it comes to our maybe baby and go with the flow. I download a few books to catch up on my knowledge on babies ,pregnancy and fatherhood.”

“ really?”noah says

“ yeah” jude says with a small smile.

“ god I love you”noah leans in and kisses jude. Jude smiles against his husband’s lips.

Jude sits back and pulls Noah with him. They stretch out on the couch. Noah is nestled in between jude ‘s legs.noah pulls away first.

“ tell me about what happened at the hospital”jude asked.

Noah rest his head on his back of his hands looking at jude.

“ every time I see her her belly it looks so different. It blows my mind.” Noah says

Jude holds up the first “photos “of their maybe baby.

“ wow look at her nose! Are those her feet?” Jude asked

“ yes I have a video you have to see it she’s sucking on her fingers!”

“ really?”

“ yes here she’s was totally spread eagle and you can see that she’s a girl clear as day.well that’s what the women says.”noah say

Jude smiles at Noah’s enthusiasm he thought it is contagious.

“ yeah her nose is cute.”noah say

“Oh wow these are really interesting looking” jude said as he hopes he is looking at the right ones.

“ ok I have to tell you something.”

“ ok ...what up ?”the tone In Noah’s voice says it could be some bad.

“She put my name down as the father. I didn’t asked to.”

Jude sighs

“What about the dna test you know we got the results in back yesterday.” Jude says

“ it’s been like this for months but I found out today.”

“ I think we need a lawyer.”jude says

“Yeah I think you might be right.”noah says

“ ok we can think about this later?” Jude says as he puts the sonagram pictures on the coffee table.

“ so what do you have in mind? Noah asked

“ happy 2 week anniversary”jude before pulling Noah into a kiss.

The next morning

Jude and Noah wake up the next day tangle in sheets .Noah’s head is at the top of th bed and Jude’s head is at the bottom with him feet next to Noah’s head.

Noah stretches his back and Jude’s feet hits his face.

Noah looks down at jude who is still sleeping and smiles to himself.He grabs his phone and turns on his camera app and starts to record.

Noah wasn’t sure how ticklish jude is. He knows he’s slightly ticklish from the fact that jude won’t get a pedicure with Lionel or him. He angle his camera to only show Jude’s foot and he runs one finger lightly over the center of Jude’s foot. Jude’s whole foot scrunches up. Noah does it again but a little hard. Jude kicks him in the face and almost fall off the bed .

Noah grabs jude ‘s leg so he didn’t fall off the bed .

“Nono” jude says in a groggy voice

“ what??”noah says with a devilish grin.

Jude scrambles to get up on the bed before noah looses his grip.

Jude sits up and eyes noah who is on his phone.

“ Jude I’ve been hacked. Wait you posted sleeping pictures of me?”

“I was wondering when you noticed when you were husband hacked .”

“ aww you even used a hashtag. I’m so proud of you.”

“ I said I would try this social media thing”jude says as he crawls to the head of the bed.

Noah smiles when jude leans in and kisses him good morning.

“ hey Dane . Sleep well.”

Jude rolls his eyes.

“You know I did .”Jude says

“ that dick the best sleeping pill ever!”noah says

“ and you can’t overdose”jude say offering his fist to pound.

They both laugh.

“ so do we have any comment”jude asked

“Of course . The one that shows my back and the top of my ass. Has the most likes.

“ you do look hot in that one.”

“ those gluts exercises are paying off.”noah say as he looks through the comments.

“ look at all the flames and heart eyes.” Jude says

“ yeah people love skin”noah say

As Noah scrolls down his comments one sticks out to him for some reason.

“ bigbro925.” Noah say out loud.

He is the first negative comment on the whole post so far.

“ is your brother older?”noah asked

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minyoongijjangjjangmanboongboong · 6 years

Text

The Parting Chapter Eleven

Description: The only certainty in life is death, and it seems to follow Park Jimin. All his life, the icy shadow of death has hung closely by his side, along with the shadow of…something else. Reapers exist to guide the souls of the living to the world beyond. But what happens when a particular Reaper tampers with the natural order and saves a mortal boy’s life? What will they do once their fates become inextricably linked?

Genre: Supernatural, Drama, Fluff, Angst

Pairing: Jimin x (f) OC

Word Count: 8.6k

Tags: Flower Shop Owner!Jimin, Reaper!OC, Non-Idol!AU, Cop!Yoongi, Supernatural!AU

Warnings: Death, swearing and mentions of alcohol, although infrequently

A/N: Hello! This story is pretty quickly wrapping up! Only a few things left to be seen/answered. I hope you guys have enjoyed the ride as much as I have! And I’m already planning for my next fic, which will be VERY reliant upon your interaction! Your choices will directly affect the story. Anyway, I’ll post more information about that once we get to the last chapter of this story. As always, I will respond to all asks received within a day of receiving them, so feel free and feel comfortable sending me anything! And please send feedback, criticism, comments or concerns my way so I can address them.

DISCLAIMER!!! Although I have researched quite a lot about Korean culture, I am taking a fictitious approach to its history. While I am trying to be historically accurate, there are sure to be details that I mess up! Please know that I have no poor intentions! DISCLAIMER!!!

AHH! And I started a Ko-Fi account! PLEASE do NOT feel pressured to donate if you don’t have the money or just don’t want to! There’s no expectation or obligation, but anything is appreciated. Love you guys! https://ko-fi.com/mercurywriter

- Mercury

Previous Chapter – Next Chapter

Chapter One

Masterlist

Weekly updates: Sunday, 1PM (PST)

Hoseok sat on an old rope swing, swaying gently along with the branches overhead. I stood beside him, leaning against the rough side of a tree with my eyes on the underbrush below our feet. Neither of us said anything for a while. After we’d seen each other, Hoseok had quickly righted himself and jerked his head towards the exit. I’d followed, throwing apologies over my shoulder at Seonhwa as I rushed after her son. She called after us, but after a few moments she simply shrugged and hopped back over the desk to rest with the pharmaceuticals.

It had been five minutes of silence between me and the nurse.

“Hoseok-,”

“Hold on,” he said, shaking his head as he gripped the rope swing with both hands. “I need to think about how to word this.”

I sighed and laced my fingers in front of me. “Please take your time,” I said. I was still avoiding going back to Jimin for the time being.

He glanced up at me from below and shook his head, staring at me properly as he blinked and said nothing for a while. “It’s just crazy,” he said.

I raised my brows. “What is?”

“All of this,” he said.

“Be specific.”

He sighed. “At first…I guess I was kinda suspicious of you because you can see…those things.”

I thought a moment. Could he possibly mean…? “Reapers?” I asked.

His eyes went wide. “They have a name?” he asked.

“Yes,” I said, then sighed. “I’m rather stunned that you can see them too.”

He shrugged and watched his feet as they traced circles into the dirt below. “Every few generations, someone in the family gets the…gene or whatever. It’s always been the women until I was born.”

I stared at the ground. “I…I believe I used to be the same. In the past.”

He cocked a brow. “Which past?” he asked.

I stiffened. “Hoseok, what do you know about me?” I asked.

He sighed and stood up, standing in front of me properly. “My mom and my grandma used to tell stories about the family heritage. Apparently, we come from a line of shamans.”

My eyes widened. So my theories were correct. These people…were my descendants. “Y-You do?”

“The earliest Kwon was named Seonhwa. She lived a really successful life actually. She practiced herbal medicine in the common class, but she wasn’t a shaman. Her grandmother was, and so was her sister…,” he paused to glance at me. “Her sister Nari.”

I shook my head and raked my fingers through my hair. “So she grew up well…,” I breathed, relief flooding through me. “She lived well. Children too…”

Hoseok chuckled. “So you really are her then? You’re…that Nari?” he asked.

I met his dark eyes, scanning them for a long moment, and reluctantly nodded my head. “I believe I am.”

He smiled and chuckled, reaching a hand out to me. “It’s nice to officially meet you,” he said, shaking my hand gently.

“You seem very unfazed by all of this,” I said.

He shrugged. “Once Dad told us that you took a temporary name, I kinda put it all together. The fact that you can see those shadows, the fact that you look like Mom and Jisoo…I don’t know, it made sense,” he said.

I chuckled. “What an odd life you must live if something like that makes any sense to you.”

He laughed and shrugged, his expression softer and kinder somehow, less hostile and distrusting than before. “Weird shit has always happened to me. Hell, this town,” he said with a laugh. “Anyway, I just got a weird vibe from you since the start. And the fact that you could talk to the shadows-,”

“Wait, how did you know that?” I asked.

He raised his brows. “That day at the hospital when Jimin found you in the hallway. I was following that shadow after it left a room and heard your voice,” he said.

“Why didn’t you say anything?” I groaned.

He scoffed. “And risk you thinking I was a crazy person? No thanks,” he said. “What if my hypothesis was wrong? I’m a nurse. I value the scientific method.”

I rolled my eyes. “Anyway…I guess I’m your aunt now?” I asked, furrowing my brow. “That seems wrong.”

He laughed and nodded. “Yeah, well…” His expression shifted as if he remembered something suddenly and he turned to me, arms crossed and eyes wide. “There’s something I’m curious about though. Aunt Nari…she died really young.”

My stomach dropped. Another early death. Just what had happened to Jimin and me all those lifetimes ago? “How young…?”

“It’s hard to say since it’s just a family story, but…twenty-one or so,” he said. “It just seems strange that you’d come to this town as the same age she died at.”

I shook my head. “I…I didn’t come here, Hoseok,” I said softly.

His eyes narrowed. “What do you mean?”

“I can’t explain it but…just know that I was sincere when I said I didn’t remember a life before waking up on the street,” I said.

His eyes went dark as he scanned me. “Nari, you’re confusing me,” he said, tone serious.

I shook my head. “That’s all I can say. Hoseok, my life began two weeks ago,” I said.

Hoseok watched me with confusion in his eyes and his jaw clenched before a sigh escaped him and he nodded. “As long as it’s not, like, time travel or something I’ll accept it.”

I laughed, feeling the mood shift towards something more comfortable and playful and nodded my head. “I am certain that’s not it.” I sighed and ran my hands over my thighs. “But…do you know how that Nari died?” I asked.

He pursed his lips. “Mom said that Grandma Seonhwa didn’t like talking about it. Seems it was a pretty big wound for the family,” he said, then peered around as if looking for spies. He leaned close. “But I have a theory.”

I raised my brows. “You do?” I asked, grabbing his arm. “What is it?”

He glanced at my fingers before prying them off of his skin. He sighed. “Whenever the family keeps something secret, it has to do with all that shaman business,” he said quietly. “It’s not something the family likes to be associated with. Ever since Grandma Seonhwa started doing herbal medicine, nobody in the family worked as shamans.”

My eyes widened. “Even though they were born with that…gift?” I asked.

He nodded. “I’ve always been suspicious. Like, why do we talk to death about all of the other relatives, but we never learn about Aunt Nari and what she did? Why she died? It’s suspicious.”

“So you think…something paranormal happened to her-er, to me?” I asked, shaking my head.

He gave me a heavy, grim look and nodded once. “I think so.”

If Jimin died at twenty-three, and I died at twenty-one then we died around the same time. Coincidences like that didn’t just…happen. I’d lost all faith in coincidence. It had to be connected. Slowly, the dots of my past life began to emerge, their hazy connections taking shape as I uncovered more information.

But there was still something nagging at me.

How did Jimin die?

At the end of the week, I made a trip to the library. Jimin and I had grown distant, with neither of us speaking much and no more shy glances. It seemed I’d really hurt him. My heart ached, but it was for his own good. I was never meant to be a permanent fixture in his life. He’d gotten too close too rapidly. The fact alone that he didn’t care about what I was said enough. He was deluded by feelings he shouldn’t have for me. And despite my own curiosities about my background and the life I lived before, I didn’t need to entangle Jimin any further. It seemed I couldn’t keep my promise to him that we’d figure things out together…

I sat at the same table we’d shared that day and watched the empty space where he would have sat with a tightening chest. I shook my head and grabbed the book of records, quickly locating Jimin’s name and trailing a finger down the page, searching for an obituary or even a cause of death. After a few seconds scanning the words, I found it.

Drowning…

I furrowed my brow and touched the word with the tip of my finger, shaking my head. How could he have drowned? I remembered that river and a shiver ran up my spine. I shut the book and slid it away, crossing my arms as I stared at the wobbly table before me, unable to understand exactly what it was that had happened between us.

“You’re researching the boy…,” said a voice from behind me.

I jumped and turned to find Zero standing with his back to me, eyes flitting over the shelves of books before him. I stood and rushed to his side, watching him as he gently lifted a hand to touch a book before sighing and glancing to the side, peering down at me.

“Zero…what are you doing here?” I asked, frantically looking around for any onlookers. “In public?”

He smiled slightly and returned to scanning the books. “We are the only souls in this library who don’t work here,” he said with a listless chuckle. “Quite a lot safer than that apartment.”

I stiffened and sighed. “Yes,” I said. “I was researching him.”

“Not the him from this lifetime, however,” he said, not even bothering to look at me.

I nodded. There was no use lying to him when he knew it all already. “Yes.”

“So you’ve remembered something?” he asked, looking at me with a smirk. “Just how much?”

“Zero…what do you know?” I asked.

He smiled, but it didn’t seem malicious. “I’m bound by contract not to tell you,” he said. “But it seems I may not have to.”

I stared up at him. “What do you mean?”

He shrugged. “Your memories are returning on their own. That, my friend, was not part of the contract,” he said, laughing slightly. “I almost can’t believe it.”

“So…my memories…they’re really mine?” I asked, voice timid, giving life to the silent fears and worries that had plagued me for weeks.

“That I cannot answer,” he said. “The only solution is to continue remembering.”

I shook my head. “But Zero, I have just over a week left before the deadline. How am I supposed to remember a lifetime?”

He sighed. “You must,” he said, finally turning to me and sending me a severe look. “If you don’t and time runs out, I must take matters into my own hands regarding the boy.”

“Can you do that?” I asked.

He nodded. “I can do many things,” he said, resting his Book on his hip. His expression soured. “If I am beckoned.”

“Beckoned…?”

He stared down at me and a soft smile touched his sharp features. “What I saw in you before is stronger now,” he said with a nod. “Remember your place.”

I exhaled in a long huff and shook my head. “I don’t understand what you mean! Stop speaking in riddles and tell me properly.”

He shook his head and reached out to give my shoulder an almost reassuring squeeze. “You have the answers, Nari.”

My eyes went wide. He called me by my name… Before I could respond, he was gone and I was left alone, staring at a shelf of books with my pulse thrumming. There was something barring Zero from speaking, some contract binding him to silence. But he said I had the answers…

All I had to do was remember.

“And that’s how Grandma Jisoo got away with insurance fraud,” said Hoseok with a sigh, leaning back on his palms as the two of us watched the advancing tide.

We’d spent the entire afternoon going over old family stories, hoping to stumble upon something useful. If Zero was convinced I had the answers, then that meant there might be a way to save both Jimin and Injung. If I could only find the right key, I could unlock the door to my third option.

But it seemed that key was rather elusive, since hours had passed and nothing had seemed relevant enough to remember. Although hearing about my descendants made me smile, I didn’t have the luxury of time to enjoy their stories. Hoseok and I sat on a checkered blanket on the sand, the sun seeping into my skin as I sighed and rested my chin on my knees. What in the world was I supposed to do when my only insight came from dreams I could neither control nor summon?

“Hoseok!” called a female voice from behind us.

The two of us turned to the source and saw Jisoo — not Grandma Jisoo who successfully committed fraud, but the living one — rushing down the beach towards us. As she approached, she rested her hands on her knees and caught her breath. She sent Hoseok a sharp look before turning to me with a smile.

“Hi, Nari!” she said, voice singsongy.

I chuckled and flitted my fingers. “Nice to see you, Jisoo.”

She wore her casual clothes which, much like mine, seemed slightly too big for her. And in her hair was a striking little pin. The pin she’d toted the other day, the lily pin. A vision flashed before my eyes to the pin I’d worn in my own hair in my dreams. I furrowed my brow. Hadn’t that been mine from the start? How could they be the same when she’d received it as a gift from Yeoreum?

I shifted away from Hoseok to make room for Jisoo on the blanket and she sat with a grin. “What’re you doing down here? Aren’t you helping Mom today?” asked Hoseok.

Jisoo tossed him a glare before returning her attention to me. “She wanted me to tell you we’re ordering takeout and you have to go get it.”

I glanced to Hoseok. There was still so much we needed to go over. Hoseok shrugged his shoulders and stood up, dusting off the backs of his legs with a sigh. “We can talk more later, Nari,” he said with a wave.

I moved to follow him, but quickly remembered Jisoo and settled back down. “You look kinda pale,” she remarked, scanning my features. “Paler than usual.”

I nodded. “I’m not doing very well.”

She pouted. “Is it something I can help with?” she asked.

I smiled and gave the top of her hand a pat. “I don’t think so,” I said. Hoseok had agreed it was best not to tell Jisoo or Seonhwa about my past life, given how the family reacted to anything occult. So I simple smiled. “That pin really suits you,” I said.

She touched it with a grin and nodded. “I think so too.”

“And it was a gift? From Yeoreum?” I asked, my tone edgy. “You mentioned he bought it.”

She shrugged. “I dunno where he got it. I kinda just assumed he bought it, but the more I look at it the more it seems like…really old.”

I stiffened. It did seem rather antiquated. “I see…”

“Mom told me a cool story when I first got it about one of our ancestors,” she said. “The one Mom is named after.”

I nodded. “Hoseok has been telling me some of your family’s stories. It’s very interesting,” I said, to which her dark eyes lit up.

She grinned. “Right? This story is my favorite I think. She’s told parts of it before, but she never told me this part,” she said with a nod. “When Grandma Seonhwa moved to this town, she met with a super rich family. Like, one of the richest ones in the area.”

I raised my brows. Such an industrious girl was meeting with nobles? “How did she know them?”

Jisoo shook her head and glanced out to the water. “We don’t know. She never talked about it.”

“Huh…” Another thing they didn’t talk about…I could only theorize that it had to do with me somehow.

“Anyway, the youngest son was her age and he really liked her,” she said with a laugh. “Every day he would send her gifts and try to get her attention, but she never responded to him.”

I chuckled. That, I could picture. The young, plucky girl with her messy hair and dirt-stained hands. Of course she would reject the advances of someone like that. “Charming.”

She shook her head. “Anyway, I guess he kept trying to give her this one lily hairpin and she kept saying no. I dunno why, but I guess that gift really ticked her off and she finally told him outright to stop,” she said, then laughed. “Which only made him like her more. I guess he only gave up when she got married to someone else.”

“How persistent,” I said, but my mind had begun churning. If that lily pin really was mine, and it did look horribly similar, then what did that say about the youngest son? A cold chill ran through me as an inkling of an idea took form in my mind. “Tell me, Jisoo. Do you know if this man had siblings?”

She nodded. “Two older brothers.”

I stiffened and stared at her profile with wide eyes. “And what was their family name?”

She pursed her lips, then snapped her fingers. “It’s Park!” she said with a grin. “Just like Jimin. I actually thought it was pretty funny when Jimin told me his family name the first day we met, since it was the same as that rich family.”

I felt my stomach flip and my hands grip the blanket tightly. Yeoreum was related to Jimin’s past. He had to be. After Seonhwa rejected that pin, that youngest son must have held onto it. And if Seonhwa was at marrying age, then I was already dead. She likely cast it away so vehemently because it had once belonged to me. I shook my head. Just how connected was everything in this town?

“Just how long will you continue watching me?” I asked, washing the linens with downcast eyes as the river rushed over my fingers.

Jimin cleared his throat and came to sit beside me, footfalls soft on the leaves and underbrush. He adjusted his hanbok and crouched on the balls of his feet, watching me as I tended to the laundry.

“Hello…,” he said softly.

I nodded my head, but didn’t look at him. For months, the boy had been relentless in his approaches toward me, leaving me no choice but to ignore him. While I was mixing herbs for his older brother’s rash, he was watching in the doorway like a specter. The day I’d spent teaching his younger brother calligraphy, the boy had lingered just outside in the garden, listening in. Time passed this way, almost too quickly for me to notice, and without even realizing I’d become comfortable with this place and with that strange second son. But the more persistent he was, the weaker my will became. I simply was no match for his stubbornness.

“Is there something you wish to discuss?” I asked. I’d grown bolder during my time with the Parks, and I seldom held my tongue around the sons.

Jimin cleared his throat and wrung his hands. “Well…it’s a bit strange, but…uh…hm…”

I finally glanced at him and saw in his cherubic cheeks was a pinkish blush, blooming all across his fair skin. I raised my brows. “Yes?”

He sighed and ruffled his hair, frustrated, before he turned to me and took my hands. I jumped, desperate to avoid his touch and the unpleasant consequences of it, but his grip was tight and his eyes were pleading. Slowly, I stilled and watched him with cautiously narrowed gaze.

“Nari, will you accompany me to the festival tonight?” he asked.

I tilted my head to the side. “Festival?” I asked.

He nodded, brows knitted. “I would really love it if you could,” he said, then his eyes went wide. “If you can spare the time of course!”

Why then did my heart race? I glanced down at my chest, ordering my fickle heart to settle down, before I met his eyes once more. “Is that appropriate? For someone like me to accompany you?”

He furrowed his brow. “Appropriate?” he asked, seemingly baffled. “What does that matter? I want to go with you.”

“And because you want it, is it so?” I asked, sighing as I gathered the washing and placed it carefully in my basket. “This is the critical difference between you and me. You, Park Jimin, request and receive. Have you known rejection?”

He stood up and stared down at me with cheeks flaming. “Yes!” he exclaimed, pointing at me wildly. “I experience it every day with you!”

I scoffed and rested my basket on my hip. “And just what do you mean?”

“I come to you all day and all day you make yourself scarce to me,” he said, pouting slightly and crossing his arms over his chest. “Would you like to know what I think our critical difference is?”

I nodded and offered a grin. “I would love to know.”

He squinted at me before glancing away, still pouting. “I see things that I desire and I reach for them,” he said, then smirked slyly. “I am not a coward.”

My chest puffed and I gaped at him, unable to manage my expression. “A coward?!” I shouted, wagging a finger at his chest. “My apologies, Young Master, but those of us who serve others have not the liberty to be brave!”

He stuck his tongue out at me and shrugged. “I am hearing many excuses from you today, Nari.” He took a step toward me. “It seems to me that you are simply finding ways to avoid me because you are afraid you may fall for me.”

I gaped. “Park Jimin, in what reality would that be the case?” I asked.

He chuckled, confidence now inhabiting his form as he leaned away. “If you’re unafraid, then come with me tonight.”

I laughed and nodded. “Fine,” I said, holding out my free hand for him to shake. “But expect no falling from me.”

He grinned and grabbed my hand, shaking it firmly. “We shall see.”

Why then did I tend to my appearance so carefully that night? I sighed at my reflection, touching my lily pin gently with my fingertip. If Seonhwa could have seen me then, gracefully made and pristinely dressed, she would have laughed. But something about that boy made me frustrated, agitated. He made me competitive and ornery. A spoiled young aristocrat, born into wealth and power, taking a shine to someone like me? It was comical. The plot to a lackluster theater performance.

Nonetheless, I made sure not a hair was set out of place.

When I entered the garden to meet him, Jimin was wringing his hands and staring at the ground. He seemed to be regulating his breathing and I wondered briefly if perhaps he was nervous. I quickly banished the thought with a dismissive shake of my head and approached him, mindful to maintain a stoicism that his charm couldn’t penetrate.

But as he turned to me with a smile, my heart leapt and I had to glance away from his flushed face and his shy grin to keep from feeling something troubling. The two of us walked together along the path from the estate which led into the town center. Jimin and I made quiet conversation, although to call it conversation was slightly overstating. Jimin indeed did most of the talking. But I didn’t find it unpleasant. In fact, his anecdotes and jesting tales made me laugh.

“Ah, Nari!” he called, pointing to a stall serving nuts to crack in the teeth. The harvest ceremony had already ended and evening was descending, lanterns lightening the paths which all the townspeople traversed with smiles. “Would you like to try?”

I stiffened and rushed toward him. “I cannot afford it-,”

He gave me a look which silenced me and shook his head. “I asked if you would like to try, not if you had money.”

I blinked and glanced back toward the stall. “I…suppose,” I said quietly.

He smiled gently, the yellow light from the lanterns reflecting in his eyes, and I wondered if perhaps he had been right. Perhaps I really had been afraid… “Let’s go then,” he said, taking my hand and leading me toward the stall.

We each pressed the nuts between our back teeth and bit down hard. It ached my jaw, but watching Jimin laugh and giggle as the crumbs fell from his lips kept my complaints from being aired. I simply watched him with a fond smile as he cracked a few more, joking that his teeth would surely be the strongest in the town if he kept going.

After a while, Jimin led the way to the beach. Many of the townsfolk dared not descend that far from the festivities, choosing instead to deviate in groups and climb cliffs to catch a glimpse of the first full moon. Jimin and I stood together, watching the sky as it turned vibrant orange and red, neither of us saying much of anything. Twilight was encroaching on the horizon, and I watched the sky carefully.

“You must like the night sky,” I remarked, thinking privately.

He glanced at me, bathed in sunset light, and smiled. “Hm?”

I felt my face go red and cleared my throat. “Well…considering your father’s occupation.”

He nodded with a sigh. “Father thinks the sky has the answers, but…I think he troubles himself too much with fate. If it is indeed inescapable, then why assume the burden of monitoring it?” he asked.

I thought a moment. His father had said that he was very worried for his second son. For Jimin. I turned to him slightly. “What do you think?” I asked.

He glanced at me with only his eyes before a small smile touched his lips. “I think…life is a very fleeting blessing. I wish to live each day with that in mind.”

I opened my mouth to remind him that not everyone could live that way, but stopped myself. The air between us was somber, vulnerable. For reasons I didn’t fully understand, I wanted to protect that. “Is that why you were so persistent towards me?” I asked.

He swallowed harshly and coughed a little, clasping his hands behind his back and turning to walk down the beach. I quickly followed, taking up a spot by his side, and examined his expression. “That is…part of the reason, yes.”

“And the other part?” I asked.

His eyes slid towards me. “The other part is…because…,” he started, then cringed slightly and shook his head. “Forget me. I’m rambling.”

“I was the one who asked,” I said, scanning him.

He flushed and looked away, his strides long and slow and easy. “Well…the other part is because you are…very different from anyone else I’ve met.”

“Is that a compliment?” I asked, emboldened by the sunset and the warm atmosphere between us.

He chuckled and rubbed the back of his neck. “You are awfully direct,” he said, then sighed and faced me. “It is a very, very good thing.” I looked away, chagrined, and listened to his endearing laugh. “When you spend all your life with people who wish to exploit you and your family…it is refreshing to meet someone sincere. Someone with a moral compass and too much pride.”

“Excuse me?” I asked, eyes wide.

He laughed and shook his head. “I really enjoy you.”

My breath hitched and I avoided his eyes once more. What sort of feeling was this? Had he always been so kind? The Park Jimin I’d known since coming to his home had been a petty troublemaker, a mischievous boy with a penchant for disturbing me. He’d frustrated me and charmed me in equal measures.

But this evening…he seemed different.

And my heart behaved differently in turn.

“I…suppose your company is not entirely bothersome,” I said, my tone begrudging as I avoided his imploring gaze.

He laughed. “Please repeat that.”

I shook my head. “I do not repeat myself for nobles.”

Jimin’s laugh echoed through the beach, now drenched in the purple hues of twilight. “I am glad to know you regard me more kindly now,” he said, voice as gentle as a cresting wave. “I’ve always regarded you that way.”

My stomach fluttered slightly and I nearly groaned in frustration. How could I have these budding emotions for someone like him? After all these years caring only for my family, I’d never once considered my romantic life. Marriage, children…they all seemed lofty goals compared to daily survival. But this aristocrat was stirring my heart about carelessly.

“Say,” he began, taking wide, sweeping steps forward. “How did you learn medicine?”

I pursed my lips. “It was out of necessity. My family…we are not the kind of people who can receive aid in any way. This includes medical treatment,” I said with a sigh.

He raised his brows and stared down at me. “Truly?”

I nodded. “Many people live this way,” I said.

He furrowed his brow. “They shouldn’t.”

With a smile, I chanced a glance his way and noticed his jaw set staunchly and his eyes narrowed. I chuckled. “Righteous outrage?” I asked.

“I never knew people really lived that way,” he said, shaking his head. “If I take after my father, I’ll see to it that the king affords basic human dignity to even the lowest class.”

I smiled. “I hope you can do it,” I said.

He peeked down at me and as our eyes met, his cheeks grew pink and he cleared his throat. “H-How do you know my father then? If you cannot approach him.”

“My father is…a very trusted physician,” I said with a nod, although the words felt like acid. “He works with your father often.”

His eyes went wide. “If your father is a physician, then your class equals mine,” he said.

I smiled at my feet as they flattened the sand beneath them. “If I were conceived legitimately, certainly.” He paused and his steps slowed to a stop. I turned to face him and met his eyes, something burning in my chest. “Does your favor end here? Has your opinion of me changed?”

He furrowed his brow and crossed his arms over his chest. “Do you think I’m such a spineless man?”

I blinked at him. “No, your reaction is simply-,”

“I’m upset,” he said. “It upsets me that you’ve had to live so poorly for nothing more than a birthright. What kind of society allows this?” he asked.

My heart pounded. I’d never imagined holding counsel with an aristocrat over such issues, and even stranger still was that our opinions aligned. I took a step toward him and crossed my own arms. “Does it truly upset you?”

He nodded. “Of course! What great wrong have you committed to live this way? And your poor mother!”

A small smile stretched across my face. “Poor indeed,” I said, tilting my head to the side as he watched the beach over my shoulder, stewing in frustration. “Father stayed with us even after my sister was born, saying he would cast away his title and raise us from poverty with the strength of his hands alone.”

Jimin’s eyes went wide. “A sister too!” he scoffed. “What a horrible man.”

“A liar too,” I said with a full-fledged grin. “He left even after promising so much. A man is only worth the value of his word, don’t you think?”

“A man’s word is his bond!” exclaimed Jimin, brows set low and face red all over from anger.

I took another small step closer, watching the spectrum of emotions on his face. “My grandmother too now must work,” I said. “Isn’t that too cruel? My elderly grandmother working as a shaman?”

“Deplorable!”

“And my sister catches fish!”

“A little girl!”

“And I work for a rich family, separated from my own!” I shouted, smiling.

At this, his outraged waned and he looked down at me with eyes reflecting the ocean, lips parted. “Why…why does your expression seem so joyful while recounting such awful things?”

I laughed and, gently, pressed my index finger between his eyebrows where the skin was creased with worry. His eyes grew round. “It is the first time I’ve commiserated with someone.” I retracted my hand and smiled at the ground. “How strange. Watching you assume my woes has made me smile.”

“Then I’ll do it forever!”

I looked up at him, at the earnestness in his wide eyes, and couldn't help but laugh. “Truly?”

“Of course! If it brings you joy…anything,” he said softly, voice petering out at the end as he turned his eyes to the ocean and the sky. “Ah! It’s the moon!” he called, pointing toward the sky with a grin.

I followed his finger and noticed that indeed, a ghost of the moon was appearing amongst the lilac clouds. I laughed. “Incredible!” I looked toward the boy and found him smiling brightly at the sky, neck craned and eyes locked on the heavens. I smiled despite myself. “Do you know the old superstition? That the first person to glimpse the first full moon of the lunar new year is granted one wish?”

He turned to me and smiled. “Is that so?”

I nodded. “You must wish quickly. Someone else may be looking at that moon as well,” I said, nudging his shoulder toward the shoreline.

He stiffened and nodded, squeezing his eyes shut and clasping his hands in front of his chest. “I wish…I wish to live a long and happy life with the people I care for, and to make the world better for those people with that life.”

I watched him profess his sincerest wish and felt a twinge of sadness in his voice. I scanned him, desperate to discern even a fraction of his thoughts from his expression. But all I saw was a yearning hope. Had I ever seen someone with such wholehearted, profound longing?

Why was he reaching for his wish with such wild, grasping hands?

He opened his eyes and offered me a smile which I couldn’t return. Instead, I simply watched him for a moment before sighing. “Why did you sound like a man about to die?” I asked.

He blinked and glanced away, rubbing the back of his head. “Do not trouble yourself on my account.”

“It is too late to advise me not to trouble myself. I am at present very troubled,” I said, walking to his side and scanning his profile, a bashful smile on his face. “If you refuse to tell me, perhaps I can write to your father.”

“No!” he shouted, turning to me with a fearful look. “He cannot know I am spending time off the estate.”

“Why is that?” I asked.

He sighed and settled on the sand, sitting on his backside and watching the waves. I joined him, still scanning his features. He ran his hands through his shaggy hair with a grimace. “I’ll tell you,” he said, then shook his head. “But once the night is over. I still wish to have fun.”

I sighed and nodded. “Fine,” I said, touching my own hair and grazing the pin with my fingertips. I watched Jimin’s face as his eyes drank in the scene of the ocean before him. Why did he look so lonesome? I removed the lily pin and held it in my palm, sighing softly. “This pin…was the only gift my father ever gave me.”

Jimin turned to me slightly, watching me. “A lily pin? For your name?”

I smiled at it, turning it over in my hands. “Yes. He said that for a name as lovely as mine, I should have a pin to match,” I said, smoothing my fingers over it. “Perhaps it seems silly to hold something that man gave me so dear, but…it is my most precious possession.”

“How many possessions do you have?” he asked, a teasing smile on his face.

I cast him a sharp glare. “Well now,” I said, huffing with a laugh. “Regardless, it is very important to me.”

“It’s beautiful.”

I was quiet a moment before taking his hand and placing it palm-up atop my knee. “I’d like you to have it,” I said as I placed the pin in his palm.

His eyes widened and he shook his head. “I couldn’t possibly-,”

I met his gaze with a soft smile. “As a thank you for this evening,” I began, “and as a reminder.” I watched his eyes flit over the pin. “You mentioned that you’d like to change the way things are, to fix them for people like me and my family. I want you to keep this pin and remember that promise.”

He stared at it, sitting daintily in his rough palm, and blinked. “Nari, I simply couldn’t-,”

“I am asking you to,” I said, then smiled. “And I am asking you to live a long, healthy life so you can do what you said you would.”

His eyes grew hazy and his fingers closed around the pin. He took it onto his lap and stared at it, nodding his head. “I will,” he said, then turned to me once more.

Slowly, he moved closer. I’d forgotten myself that night, neglecting my position and allowing myself to slip into the easy fantasy that the two of us were simply people. Perhaps friends even. But as his advanced, eyes shut, a brief panic ran through me. I had to run away. I had to save myself from the punishment of cavorting with someone so far above me. I had to save Jimin from the harsh reprimands of his father should anything happen between us.

But in the end, once his plush lips touched mine, I could do nothing but shut my eyes and lean into his touch. Frustration coursed through me, but so did something else. Something much deeper and warmer, skipping through my veins and setting my skin alight. The kiss was short, chaste, but intimate. He pulled back first and stared at me, face still inches from mine, breaths coming slightly shallow as he scanned me. His brows knitted and his eyes fell to the ground.

He took a steadying breath before looking at me again. “Nari…the reason I made that wish is because…,” he began, then stopped and shook his head, swallowing hard. “I am very, very sick.”

My eyes went wide and I backed away, watching him carefully as he ran his fingers through his hair. We’d shared but one kiss, one evening of joy and laughter, and yet this confession sent my heart aching. Why, after just one night, did I wish so deeply to protect this boy?

Morning light sifted through the curtains beside my bed and I watched it for a moment as my senses returned to me. I had awoken from my dreams not with a start, but with a stiffness in my chest. The dream had only confirmed my fears. The Jimin from my memory was nearing his demise. The more of my past memories returned, the closer I felt to this horrible itch in the back of my mind, ever-present and scraping, growing stronger and stronger. I was close to something, something important.

All I had to do was remember.

But I had less than a week left.

I padded out of my bedroom, scratching my head as I wandered towards the kitchen. But as I did, I noticed the refrigerator was open and standing before it was Jimin. He turned to me and opened his mouth as if to speak before, upon thinking a moment, shutting it with a sigh and shutting the refrigerator, maneuvering around me into the living room where he fell against the sofa.

While I tried to make myself accept the distance I’d forced between myself and Jimin, it still hurt to see him in the mornings, readying himself alone, eating alone, heading down to the shop alone. It was a far bigger wedge than a simple rejection. If I’d rejected him, perhaps he might have laughed it off and continued as normal. I’d placed a block between us that was forged of steel. My own unwillingness to allow him close to me, an impregnable wall keeping him from coming to me.

Things were fine before I’d known the depth of his feelings for me. I could convince myself he would surely hate me once I told him the truth about me, but still he stood beside me, steadfast as ever. I could force myself to believe he was only attached to me because I was available, because I was around so often. But he wanted to be with me. For real.

It was for his own good that I wouldn’t allow it.

“Will you pick up some purple ribbon from the store? I’m arranging a wedding bouquet and I don’t have enough,” he said.

Our words were scarce lately. I nodded. “Sure.”

He was quiet, the silence palpable as I stood with nothing to do in the kitchen. “Nari?” he asked, voice breaking slightly.

I swallowed the lump in my throat and nodded. “Mhm?”

“Please don’t disappear,” he said softly.

I felt the tears welling in my eyes. How could he be so astute yet so oblivious? I turned toward the front door and dabbed my eyes. “I’ll get going now,” I said.

Jungkook helped me check out after I’d found the right ribbon, and the way he eyed me from above let me know he was worried. His brow was slightly lowered, his eyes scanning my features. I wanted to tell him it was fine, that I was fine, but I couldn’t bring myself to lie to him. Things were so messy and complicated, and my only saving grace was a faulty memory which only arrived in bursts while I slept.

I left the supermarket with one small bag in my hands and wandered through the streets of the town, the tall white-washed buildings I’d glided through before this whole mess began. The uneven pavement, the bright sky and the sun which bleached the bricks. Before I knew it, I was outside that bar. The one Jimin had gone to the night he’d almost died. It was odd to return to such an unsettling place. Just down the street was where I’d emerged as a human being, where I’d defied the laws of the universe for a single boy. I remembered the street slicked with rain and black as sin. I remembered the tingles in my new naked body as I struggled to understand what had happened. After three-hundred years of invisibility…

I sighed and continued walking, routing myself back towards the flower shop.

But as I rounded a corner, I heard a distinct voice. A deep, chesty voice that I recognized at once. Kim Taehyung. Quickly, I crept along the side of a building and inched into the backstreet, untouched by foot-traffic and the source of Taehyung’s voice. I followed it slowly, keeping to the shadows, and peeked around the corner of a decrepit building, catching sight of a red bandana and dark hair. It was him indeed.

“I’m not doing this,” he said, and from his voice alone I knew he was agitated.

I stiffened and peeked at my own discretion, keeping close to the exterior wall of the building so as not to be noticed. “I know. I don’t wanna do it either…,” said a second voice. I tried to place it.

“Then don’t,” he implored.

The second voice sighed. “It’s not that simple.”

Taehyung huffed and I heard a crash, likely the sound of him kicking something into the silent, empty street. “It is! Just leave him alone! Haven’t you done enough now?” he asked.

I shook my head. Surely, he couldn’t mean Jimin… “If I could stop I would, okay?” asked the second voice in a shout. It was so familiar, but impossible to assign to someone without seeing their face. It was too frantic to match the voices I knew. Perhaps if he calmed down…

“Whatever. You’re alone on this one. I had a bad feeling that first night that I shouldn’t have accepted your stupid deal,” spat Taehyung.

The second man sighed. “I should’ve told you the truth from the start. But listen, we’re in too deep now. If I get caught, so do you,” he said.

“What?! I’m not the one who tried to kill somebody! Your instructions were clear: invite Jimin out, get him drunk, text you when he leaves the bar,” said Taehyung. My heart raced. He was the one after all. But who was this man who had commissioned him?

“Do you really think they’ll let you off with a slap on the wrist?! You’re an accomplice to an attempted murder!” shouted the second man. The longer I listened, the more familiar his voice became. But it was still too hard to discern through the yelling.

“Like hell!” shouted Taehyung. “I’m out! Just…skip town or something. I don’t wanna see your face anymore.”

“Wait!”

“Getting involved with you was a fucking mistake!” he yelled.

The first man shouted into the air. “It’s one more night Taehyung! All I need you to do is make sure he goes to that stupid fair!” he called.

“Not a chance!”

“Jesus, do I really have to threaten you?” the man yelled.

The conversation was going nowhere and Taehyung’s voice was growing more and more distant. This was my chance. An opportunity to get a glimpse of the murderer with my own eyes. If I didn’t seize it, he would slip through my fingers once more. I didn’t have much time to unravel this mystery before it was too late. And if this man was planning to attack during the fair, I needed to know who to look out for.

Stealthily, I edged around the corner. I could only see his back, calling after Taehyung, but I could see some distinguishable features. Dark hair, long legs, black shirt. He was too far away. If I could just get a closer look…

“What was that?” asked Taehyung, whipping around to look in my direction. His eyes went round and horrified as he stared at me and I was rendered immobile in fear.

The culprit’s posture went rigid as he looked at Taehyung before, like a lightning bolt, he was sprinting down the street. “Stop!” I screamed, running after him.

Taehyung watched me as I whizzed past him before he too began running, but in the opposite direction. I wasn’t sure where he was going or what he would do, but as we passed one another, I noticed him reach into his pocket and grab his cell phone. Just like that night. I shook my head and kept running, pushing my body to its limit as I raced after the man’s rapidly retreating form as he became but a dot on the horizon, weaving through alleyways and between buildings.

I searched for the man for hours, the ribbon long forgotten, my breaths coming and going in wheezing gasps. But in the end, he was far faster than me. I’d been so foolish, chasing a man like that. I was desperate. There was nothing more I could do besides run and run. And as I ran, things became clearer and clearer. Taehyung had been contracted by this man to lure Jimin out. Taehyung seemed not to know the scope of what he was involved in, likely unaware that the end result would be murder. This man, this mastermind, seemed bound to his actions as well. As if there was something far larger than him pulling the strings.

Just like Jin had said. Perhaps this was much larger than a petty murder case…

I approached the flower shop with blisters on my heels and my hair a mess atop my head. My eyes never lifted as I walked past the front of the shop, but I noticed in the reflection of the glass that two police patrol cars were parked on the curb. I tilted my head and thought a moment. Why were they here?

Unless…

My heart raced and I shook my head in fear, hands trembling as I quickly ripped the door open. No, no, no. The murderer was surely not reckless enough to attack Jimin right after being spotted. Surely he had more sense than that. Surely, surely. I shook my head, rushing into the shop.

Breathlessly, I looked around and tears began collecting in my eyes. “Jimin!” I shouted, voice cracking from the strain. “Jimin! Jimin, are you okay?!” I cried.

Movement came from the back of the shop and my eyes darted madly towards it, jumping at the promise of Jimin’s safety. But who emerged left my chest deflated. Yoongi approached me slowly, sighing as he came close, and scanned my face, avoiding my eyes altogether.

“Where’s Jimin? Is he safe?” I asked, tears spilling.

Yoongi nodded. “He’s in the back talking to Namjoon.”

I sighed, relief rushing through my body, and nodded. “Thank God. I just saw the murderer. I chased him, but I lost him in town. He was talking to-,”

“You’re under arrest for suspicion of attempted murder.”

My blood ran cold and my words halted. “What?”

“You have the right to an attorney,” he said, staring into the middle ground beside me with an almost disinterested affect. “Anything you say can and will be held against you in the court of law-,”

“Yoongi-,”

“If you cannot afford an attorney, one will be assigned to you.”

“Yoongi, wait-,”

“Please come with me back to the station.”

“Yoongi!” I shouted, finally forcing him to look me in the eyes. When he did, I saw something there that startled me. Both regret and apprehension. He didn’t trust me… “Yoongi, you know I didn’t do it.”

He sighed and gripped the bridge of his nose. “I don’t know, Nari. That’s the problem.”

I shook my head. “I’d never hurt Jimin.”

“We received an incriminating testimony from someone who was at the bar that night,” he reported with a shake of his head. “He said you spoke to a man while Jimin was lying on the ground before removing your clothes and feigning unconsciousness.”

“I…I what?” I asked, shaking my head. “Yoongi, that is absolutely impossible.”

He shrugged. “It’s a reliable statement.”

I swallowed hard, peering over his shoulder towards the back of the store as Namjoon and Jimin emerged. Jimin’s face was red. It was clear he’d been crying, eyes swollen and cheeks puffy. He lifted his eyes to look at me and I tried with all my heart to understand what those eyes held for me. Contempt? Anger? Hatred?

All I could see was a broken boy, all alone.

“Was it Taehyung?” I asked quietly, piecing it all together.

Yoongi sighed. “I can’t disclose that.”

I nodded. “I understand.”

Wordlessly, he placed a hand between my shoulder blades and led me towards the front door, guiding me to his car. Before I exited the shop, I looked over my shoulder and met Jimin’s eyes. Hopelessly, I sniffled as tears trailed down my face. Suddenly, the ground was ripped out from under me. Everything I relied upon was taken in an instant, and I was left stumbling in the blackness of the infinite unknown alone.

I didn’t know if I would ever see him again.

So, loudly enough for him to hear, I nodded my head and said the only thing I knew was true. The only thing I could think to say. “I love you.”

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