#no I cannot explain any of this
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It might just be the architect in me but I can see the Herondale’s childhood home in my mind as clearly as if it were a memory
#will herondale#cecily herondale#herondales#the infernal devices#tid#the shadowhunter chronicles#tsc#i can walk you through the floor plan#but the entire image is also slightly tinted blue#which considering their eyes#makes more sense than it should#the kitchen is a weird sky blue like the summer sky at noon in the american south#and the curtains white though they are reflect the blue and become tinted too#the grass is always a bit damp#and there is a field around it that after about a mile or two is edged with pine#no I cannot explain any of this#this is also the writer in me#there are massive bay windows that Ella used to read in and Will could pull her off and make her come out to the creek with him and Cecily
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What home smells like (Crossroads comments)
Note: judging by the audio I extracted and the conversation file, Bellara and Taash don't have lines for that event (if they actually have lines and I missed them, pls lmk).
Rook: That scent… I can't place it. Neve: For a moment… it smelled like Dock Town after it rains. Lucanis: Coffee. Like Illario and I smelled in the kitchen where we grew up. But that cannot be right. Harding: That's my ma's apple cake! But… how? Davrin: That's smoke from my old clan's campfire. But… how do I even know that? Emmrich: It's reminiscent of the mortuary's perfumes, but… ah. Of course. Emmrich: There's small enchantments around this place. From the old elves, welcoming their kindred home.
My DAVG Extracted Audio Masterlist
#anyway. so much to unpack here#I know it's just a way to leave things ambiguous so they don't hinder players' headcanons but Rook not knowing what home smells like is...#it's quite a lot#then Lucanis's “like Illario and I smelled”. their lives are so intertwined he cannot recall his own childhood without Illario#very normal!#“how do I even know what my old campfire smells like?” how would you NOT Davrin. or maybe you are just surprised you still remember?#that this life you thought you'd completely left behind#is still so important to you that the crossroad spirits immediately clock you as missing it?#very disappointed that Bellara doesn't actually have lines here why does it fall to Emmrich of all people to explain what's going on there!#and that Taash doesn't have any considering that smell is their entire thing!!#datv audio#davrin#davrin dragon age#emmrich volkarin#lace harding#lucanis dellamorte#neve gallus#veilguard audio#dragon age#dragon age the veilguard#flowers.txt#flowers blogs#rook datv#rook dragon age#rook
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again and again and again and again
#signalis#elster#ariane yeong#arielster#lilith itou#alina seo#lstr 512#biruesque art#you guys cannot posibly understand what i Went thru drawing this#i dont even have any way to explain it#i just hope this picture conveys an intense enough emotion that u Get it
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the accolade ( the...the cat-olade...)
#mine#original#i cannot even begin to explain the anguish. the torment. this drawing has brought me#and i STILL dont like it. i simply cant work on it any longer i cant i cant. i must be rid of it#eating drywall as we speak#you want to know how many weeks ive worked on this. THREE. ALMOST.#you want to know how long my other cat drawings take me ?? 3 days absolute MAX#anyway. begon foul creature etc#i havent left extremely long tags for a long while hello everyone good lord there are many of you#we are going stratford this weekend very exciting#its going to be a little chilly and i want to take my new coat with me but issue its not chilly right now so i cant wear it onto the train#i do not think. i can. stuff it into my suitcase i dont think that will happen#i am sure i will figure it out#also. no longer vegan . eggs have won me over. egg egg egg.#im having to restrain myself SO hard from buying more wool i want a shawl i want a shawl#i want more cute DRESSES why are nice comfy dresses 10000£#i look on vinted and its like dresses for popping your pussy in like not. the vibe im going for thank u#anyway. im going to eat crackers now
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please keep doing the right thing by not calling out this or any other imitators of your art. if they're not impersonating you, deceiving people about whose artworks were made/posted first, or threatening your livelihood (which is a wholly seperate issue of economics), there's no material damage being done here. that just leaves the shitty feelings you get from being aware of the imitation, and i have faith that you can get over those and move on with your life.
fact: your art is technically skillful and broadly appealing to tumblrites both in style and subject (big fandoms, popular ships, familiar tropes and ideas). that's why it's popular.
fact: social media incentivizes creators to post whatever content gets the most engagement and viewers to engage with the same kinds of content over and over, regardless of who copied who.
fact: the only thing no one else can copy is the fact that your art was made by *you*. if that's not enough for you to feel secure in the inherent value of what you make, i'm afraid there's an part of you that fears that your work is replaceable.
the discomfort and "creepiness" you talk about sounds like you're stuck in zero-sum mindset: this person can only gain something by taking it away from *you*. and that's just not true. what do you feel you're "losing" to them in this competition? praise? attention? social media points? money (see above)? unpack that.
fact: your art will be harder to imitate and less attractive to imitators if you get weirder and more experimental with it. which i would love to see, btw.
i appreciate this !! but also i should clarify: i'm not upset because i'm jealous of this person getting attention or i feel like i'm 'losing' to them in any way. i'm very secure in my own work now and if this was a stranger i probably wouldn't care as much. this is not any kind of 'threat' to me and the amount that this affects my actual life is very minimal
i'm upset because this is someone who i gave the benefit of the doubt and actually befriended, who went from taking small stylistic choices i made to potentially ripping off entire characters/comics that i wrote, and did it to my face. and i don't think it's an overreaction for me to be weirded out by that
#ramble#i appreciate the sentiment but this is reading into my psyche a Lot akdfhjs. is it just me#anon with all respect what does any of this mean#also i cannot stress enough i'm not a public figure i am literally just some guy. i'm not pictures floating in space i'm a PERSON#i honestly can't explain why this whole thing is weird to me. it's just sort of. rude???#literally none of the social media/money/attention part of this matters to me it's that my art is very personal to me and they took it#like you spend so long making absolute garbage to find your own style and then somebody just takes it from you#and even while this was happening i was adding new things to my art and they were right behind me doing the same things#it's so stupid that this is about elves i hate it here#sorry this makes me sound so bitchy i'm just so fucking done with it
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tfone au where OP is created as the last of the primes but way after them, a sparkling born at what were thought to be the last days of the war against the quintessons, the beginning of a new generation of peace after eons of war. a child meant to be loved and raised knowing nothing of war nor sacrifice.
he's kept mostly out of the spotlight by his siblings, who don't wish to expose him to everyone's optics so young, and want to wait until the war is done and over to properly introduce him to their people.
except of course the primes are betrayed and murdered by sentinel, the war is lost and everyone who knows and cared for the truth is either banished or outright killed in order to suppress it.
and the high guard, the ones the primes trusted the most, the ones that were supposed to protect them, the ones who failed in their most important duty, have to make a choice. to take the last prime, their last hope, with them to the surface, a hostile environment where there's little to no supplies and where they'll be hunted down by both sentinel and the quintessons as the biggest threat to their regimen.
or hide him in plain sight. place him where sentinel won't think to look for him. one more sparkling among many. and hope it will be enough to keep him alive. pray to primus that he'll protect his last child long enough for them to come back for him when it's safer (even if most of them have already lost their faith on him when he allowed the rest of his children to be massacred like that)
they almost lose their resolve when they realize they will have to take the little one's cog away in order to make him blend in with the rest of the newborns (and oh do they burn with murderous intent when they see what sentinel has done to their people but it's not the time yet-) but in the end they decide an impaired little prime is better than a dead one.
and so in the chaos of thirteen dead primes and a sudden energon crisis, a little sparkling who very few mechs really knew about and even fewer had seen completely vanishes. and in the depths of iacon a mech in charge of a new batch of newborns scratches their helm in confusion as they realize they must have miscounted the first time.
optimus prime is quietly erased from any official records by sentinel, written off as dead when they find a sparkling's frame mangled beyond recognition after an attack on the base of those rebels that insist on being a thorn on his side. killing the sparkling hadn't been precisely in his plans, he probably could've found some use for it after all, but he's not particularly upset about it either.
and orion pax grows up with an ache on his spark that tells him he's missing something far more important than a t-cog and dreams of gentle and loving hands, cradling him against the frames of mechs he cannot recall the faces of.
#i talk a lot <3#transformers#transformers one#optimus prime#orion pax#baby prime orion au#this is mostly an excuse for me to draw the primes and baby OP later on. just to be clear.#i WILL be drawing this at some point lmao#tbh i'm a little uncertain how i want things to progress#because on one hand it would be very tasty and tense if sentinel recognized optimus during the race#but that means a lot of changes very early on in the plot and i would have to do a lot of Thinking on how to justify getting the gang#to still pick up bee and elita. cause i love them <3#i do think it'd be very funny if the high guard's plan worked like a charm except for the very tiny fact that they didn't count#on orion being an absolute hellion. like. this kid is Not Going Unnoticed and it's completely his own fault lmao#in this version maybe a member of the high guard stayed behind to keep an eye on orion and is able to get them out before they're killed#but instead of taking them to where the primes fell they take them directly to the high guard#which is very awkward because it's a very moving and emotional moment for the high guard who are finally reunited with their little prime#all grown up and healthy and blessedly *alive*. except orion doesn't fucking remember any of them and is very confused as to why#the legendary warriors of cybertron are getting all weepy over him. they finally explain the truth to him which is a Fucking Bomb#to drop on anyone but especially a group of kids who almost got killed by the person they all thought the world of just hours ago#they also return orion's t-cog to him which would create some tension between him and the rest of the gang because this time#he's the only one getting his cog back. add to it that they were just told he's the equivalent of a demi-god and... well.#there's a gap between him and them that wasn't there before#on the other version of events that follows canon more closely everything goes the same up until the gang finds the primes in the cave#and wake up alpha trion who now not only has to deal with the fact the rest of his siblings are dead but that he missed fifty cycles#of his baby brother's life. that the only sibling he has left does not remember him or his true identity at all.#he has to choose between telling him the truth which has the risk of unbalancing him in a critical moment where he cannot afford to#be distracted because they're being hunted down. or let him remain unaware. let him forget their family and the love they had for him#but letting him remain free of the knowledge of what he lost and the heartbreak it would bring.
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The Helena diaz of it all has me fascinated. I’ve said for a long while that Eddie’s real issues are his mommy issues and this episode just cemented for me that we’re gonna explore that and deal with it.
Because it’s Helena who forced Eddie to grow up to fast - because her husband wasn’t around much - so she pushed Eddie into de facto parent and husband role ls - selfishly filling her needs and ignoring the damage it was doing to her son (it is a form of abuse in my book).
Eddie then had the audacity to fall in love with and marry Shannon and get her pregnant. It’s why Helena was always so off with Shannon - she was punishing her. She is also punishing Eddie for all of this and his refusal to return to El Paso only cemented further her bitterness and resentment.
Now she does have Ramon back she doesn’t need Eddie any longer to fill that role so she is still punishing him and part of that is tied into her glee over now getting to parent Christopher - something she has always been intent on doing the doppelgänger just gave her the opportunity- as well as allowing her to further punish her son and his love of Shannon.
Her barbed comments about building a pool were all about showing what she can provide Christopher - how she is parenting him better than Eddie - it’s part of her mind games - making Eddie feel like more of a failure as a parent to his son.
The reality of course is that the reverse is true - Helena’s parenting is all superficial, flash and showy - it isn’t the hard day to day parenting when things get tough and you have to be the bad guy. While Eddie has made mistakes, there is nothing superficial, flash, or showy about his parenting. It’s why bucks comments about Eddie being a great dad are so important.
Eddie feel like a failure right now and that he is entirely to blame for everything. But in reality, while he does bear a bit of the responsibility, the truth of the matter is that he needs to learn and deal with the fact that all of it actually stems from Helena and her abuse of her young son - Shannon never stood a chance just like Eddie never has.
#genuinely don’t see how she can get any sort of redemption arc#but this is 911 so maybe they’ll find a way 🤷🏻♀️#Helena’s treatment of Eddie is a form of child abuse - it has done so much damage to him psychologically#I do really hope we finally get to meet Sophia and adriana as part of this arc beciase I think it might be very revealing#I am also wondering if Ramon had a stache in the past - and that is what Eddie is subconsciously trying to mimic#and that is about him trying to regain his mothers affection - trying to fill that husband role she forced him into#and that shaving it off is a part of his dealing with that and choosing to free himself from her clutches#and in doing that - standing up for himself etc - it will be the trigger that v ring schristopher back#the catholic guilt and Eddie’s queerness is also all tied up in this - the church reinforces and condones Helena and her actions#the Catholic Church has a long history of abuse of children in all it’s horrendous forms#so Eddie seeking solace in that direction think it will help him find away back to Helena’s good books only for it to open a few doors he#has bolted shut#as for the queer aspect - forcing Eddie to grow up too fast and fill this role of husband to his mother and parent to his siblings means#Eddie never got the chance to learn who he actually is - to explore his sexuality and all that goes with that - at the age one normally#would - as a teenager and into your 20’s. it explains so much around his relationship with Shannon and dealing with the helana of it all#and the queerness of his identity - will also allow him to actually let Shannon go#Eddie’s arc is going to be incredible - heartbreaking and gut wrenching - but incredible#Helena diaz it’s on sight - she is evil and cannot be redeemed in my eyes!#911 spoilers#Thinky thoughts#eddie diaz#911 abc
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i don't know if that scene was intended to make us like trinity more or make us think she's actually badass! or something but i'm actually leaning towards it just reinforcing the prior characterization of her being emotionally ill-prepared for this environment and having no self control whatsoever. as a csa survivor AND someone going into healthcare ... yeah you can't just Do That, buddy
#a.txt#the pitt#like yes this reveal absolutely explains why she's full of aggressive defense mechanisms it explains her rancid front perfectly#but it doesn't make me *like* her any more and it also doesn't make me think of that as a mic drop or anything#it was just like. this is not how you handle this situation. you cannot project so viciously onto any patient situation like that.#talking to the daughter went SO badly like girl that is not how you do this!#if someone approached me like that at that age and in front of my sick father i would not have answered truthfully either#there's no winning obviously but threatening a patient is a one way ticket to losing your job#anyway yes it's a drama. i know this. but it was also reckless and foolhardy and i think that was the point of it#not a girlboss moment but a wow she is damaged and doing damaging things moment#csa tw#there is nothing in her control that could stop that man from further victimizing his child and making life worse for her in retaliation
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I procrastinated again so y'all get more Fairy Tail dragon slayer memes
#low budget memes#memes#Fairy Tail#Dragon slayers#The shitty editing software will remain#I'm having too much fun -#I cannot explain to you all how much joy these lil guys give me#Natsu#Natsu Dragneel#Gajeel#Gajeel Redfox#Erik#Cobra#Laxus#Laxus Dreyar#Wendy#Wendy Marvell#Acnologia#Sting#sting eucliffe#Rogue#rogue cheney#Sorry folks Serena didn't make an appearence today#This is 100% to procrastinate on the Dragon Slayer fanfic#Also if anyone with ANY experiance in adding pictures to Tumblr knows how to resize objects#I will owe you my life
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Scott Pilgrim Characters as Text Posts but they’re mostly of Stacey and Neil cause I’m obsessed with them :]























#some of these may have been done before but i cannot remember so apologies in advance i forgot#when i saw the first meme done with julie i knew i had to do it with stacey#last image you gotta read from bottom to top btw (i also added in stacey and scott and lawrence whos not here mom to make the image complet#)#I don’t personally ship Neil with Lynette envy or Lisa but those are the other three women I’ve seen him be shipped with#that make sense for that text post (julie would never and Kim is kissing Ramona)#we all know how garbage trash I am for nordegrim here so I don’t need to explain anything#stacey pilgrim is a little hater in my heart#scott may be her brother but she face palms whenever he does something incredibly stupid#scott pilgrim#scott pilgrim comic#scott pilgrim vs the world#scott pilgrim takes off#stacey pilgrim#young neil#neil nordegraf#julie powers#wallace wells#lynette guycott#envy adams#lisa miller#roxie richter#nordegrim#not gonna tag any of the other neil ships here cause it is mostly nordegrim#cw suggestive#emily shitposts
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Have you ever heard the noises axolotls make? its kinda quiet blub!, when they reach the surface of the water to gulp down some air. Anyway any time i see JellyNeil my mind immediately goes to Neil just making that noise
I HAVE NOW. wow I made a reel for the first time in forever just so I could get this across properly, here you go



(Audio from this YouTube video)
Find the mer au masterpost here 💕
#this was DELIGHTFUL#it’s okay for the first few years I bet a jelly mer could do quite well in a tank or fishbowl#as long as you are aware it will try to eat everything in there#e v e r y t h i n g#so keep it with some crabs and snails probably#or any fish big enough to fend for itself#I cannot promise the safety of your little shrimp#and give it toys#why am I getting into ‘the care of your jellyfish’ rn#stop that we got work to do#(@ myself)#but thank you for the ask I loved this hehe#also explain to me why my brain is so sure that jelly mers can breathe air easier than most fish#not like a mammal like a whale or whatever#it’s not the ideal way to get oxygen#but jellyNeil breathes air better than the sharks#and for why#no clue#anyway#fan art#my art#aftg#all for the game#neil josten#jellyneil au#jellyfish#mer au#asks#jellyneil#mer research notes
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could you draw ragatha comforting an abstracting pomni? like ragatha calms her down enough to make the abstraction go away! thanks :3
🎶When darkness is all you see This is our Sweet Blasphemy🎵
#buttonblossom#pomni x ragatha#the amazing digital circus#i don't know any lullabies so i went with the next best thing#aka a song that i like but also i think it would be really funny if the only song Ragatha remembered from her old life was just.#a random Black Veil Brides song#idk the lyrics kinda work if you squint. cannot explain it. you have to find strength in yourself and others to be free#idk. i'm tired lol#off topic. all the other requests i got were angst. not complaining i just think it's interesting. makes sense with the existential themes#sorry i didnt draw her fully abstracting i had this in my head and just went for it
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so tired of tudor dramas where there are no women… and even when there are women… there aren’t…ykwim?
#im occasionally on the cusp of rewatching the tudors and then im just like… naur#it’s very annoying that we see men ‘networking’ and not women even tho we know that they were#like the ladies of each queen being basically decorative . it is annoying to me that henry has friends#more or less#we never see his sister interact with other women in a substantial way#we never see anne and mary boleyn with their mother#that he has these long talks with and his wives… well. don’t . you only get the shape of that (even Margaret pole and coa seemed like …#idk. affectionate but weirdly distant )#we only really see mary interact substantially with Chapuys#and pretty much surface-level with other women#and wolf hall/TmATL it’s the same thing . it feels like women are there only when the story cannot AVOID mentioning them.#and those are the two longest series about the Tudors . and one is prestige and one is not but it’s where you have the most ~material ~#some of these tags are out of order . im typing on my phone#you can all . sort them out if you made it this far lol#i just need to reread my fav Tudor books instead … I think ….#there are like . three-five novels i reread in rotation#also honestly I’ll say it : I think that dearth explains PGreg’s popularity#the way she writes women is um… horrible#but they are very prominent . they’re the main characters#in a way they’re just not in other Tudor stuff#(& also in wolf hall/TmATL they are only there in relation to crom…#how is this in any way a substantial improvement#from the precedent of that series which is all the women#only as they are in relation to hviii?#like all that was ‘subverted’ was picking a different man to centre the story#where all the women are just satelliting him)
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i feel like im not making any sense but does anyone else feel like there are stories that let u run with them and ones that spell everything out for you
#im reading that post that says artists are directors of audience reaction and not its dictator:#'you cannot guarantee that everyone viewing your work will react as you are trying t make them react. a good artist knows that this is what#allows work to breath. by definition you cannot have art where the viewer brings nothing to the table ... this is why you have to let go of#the urge to plainly state in text exactly how you think the work should be interpreted ... its better to be misinterpreted sometimes than#to talk down to your audience. you wont even gain any control that way; people will still develop their opinions no matter what you do#im thinking abt this again cuz i was thinking maybe the thing that lets adventure time work so well the way it does is cuz it doesnt#take itself too seriously that it gives the audience enough room to fuck with subtext and then fuck with them back yknow. i think it was#mentioned somewhere that they werent even planning to run with the postapocalyptic elements that are hinted in the show but changed their#mind after the one off with the frozen businessmen and dominoed into marcy and simons backstory. on the other side there are stories that#explain too much to let the story speak for itself and i think it ends up having to do more with the crew trying to lead ppl in a certain#direction than expand on what they have and i see a lot of this with miraculous. like when interviews and tweets are used as word of god in#arguments and it becomes a little stifling to play around with it knowing the creator can just interject. u can say its the crews effort to#engage with its audience but it feels more like micromanaging. and none of this is to say there ISNT room for stories that spell things out#theyre just suited for different things. if sesame street tried abstract approaches to themes and nuance itd be counterproductive#a lot of things fly over my head so i need help picking things apart to get it- but it doesnt have to be from the story itself. ive picked#picked up or built on my own interpretations listening to other ppl share their thoughts which creates conversation around the same thing#sometimes stories will spell things out for you without being so obvious abt it that it feels like its woven into the text. my fav example#for this might be ATLA using younger characters as its main cast but instead of feeling like its dumbed down for kids to understand why war#is bad its framed from a childs point of view so younger audiences can pick up on it by relating to the characters. maybe an 8 year old#wont get how geopolitics works but at least they get 'hey the world is a little more complicated than everyone vs. fire nation'. same for#steven universe bc its like theyre trying to describe and put feelings into words that kids might not have so they have smth to start with#especially with the metaphors around relationships bc even if it looks unfamiliar as a kid now maybe the hope is for it to be smth you can#look back to. thats why it feels like these shows grew up with me.. instead of saving difficult topics for 'when im ready for it'#as if its preparing me for high school it gave me smth to turn in my hands and revisit again and again as i grow. stories that never#treated u as dumb all along. just someone who could learn and come back to it as many times as u need to. i loved SU for the longest time#but i felt guilty for enjoying it hearing the way ppl bash it. bc i was a kid and thought other ppl understood it better than me and made#feel bad for leaning into the message of paying forward kindness and not questioning why steven didnt punish the diamonds or hold them#accountable. but im rewatching it now and going oh. i still love this show and what it was trying to teach me#yapping#diary
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so does this mean that he still has two cocks or
#the joke is terrible and untimely sorry#but im really confused like#is the dragon story canon or not#cause i thought that myths are some kind of side stories but then#the scene in the last chapter of the card happened and yeah#still cannot figure out if there is any connection between the myth cards and the main story#genuinely can someone explain it to me#if its canon how did he manage to survive#was he resurrected somehow#does the gragon sylus have anything in common with the sylus in main story or not#lads sylus#sylus#love and deepspace#this game makes me go crazy#love and deepspace sylus
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actually gonna take a mini break..... which could mean i won't go on tumblr at all or it just means i'll only be making simple posts and not reblogging, and it could be for the rest of the day or it could be for a number of days (this is significant i promise usually i would be yapping like CRAZY rn)
i don't like disliking my show. i don't need to hear about everything they did wrong when i want to be celebrating everything they've done right for 7 seasons. i can't expect everyone to decide that positivity is the only way and i can't expect people to not want to share their opinions when i can't seem to stop talking about my opinion on that. i don't want to do what i did when season 4 came out and i tried to forget tdp existed for months because i couldn't stand being a fan of something others didn't like. tdp is everything to me. i'm not letting this part of my life go because i care too much about what everyone else thinks. and i know that's nobody's fault but my own, but still. i'm hoping it dies down, but even if it doesn't, i just need to step back and remind myself why i love this show, and that that is all that matters.
i know it is NOT that deep but the finals week stress + mourning-in-advance + insane adrenaline rush and joy while watching followed by + immediate feeling of dread and incredible sadness and confusion and anger after i've already had a rough couple and months and tdp was the sole thing keeping me going, it has all just been a lot, as i'm sure you can imagine. it sounds so excessive and sensitive and it probably is those things, but it's how i feel. mainly i just really needed to get this off my chest lol
#sometimes i forget i'm autistic and then i'll be sent into a depressive episode because i can't stop crying about criticism over a cartoon#which i've built my entire life around#i'm a kid guys. an autistic child. hey maybe THAT'S why this season meant so much to me#continuethesaga#giveusthesaga#vent#personal#also like i've tried to explain i'm not blaming anyone else or asking anything of anyone for my issues but at the very least#i'd like it if we could keep the notes on my posts positive#and maybe specify when it's not entire clear if you're being positive bc my mental state cannot take the chance#yk it's whatever i don't want to be any more of a baby then i'm already being but i would appreciate that#and thanks to everyone who has made me feel better <3 always trust in the moots
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