#no explanation for the third one sorry it doesnt need an explanation

[hellpuffin]

ok back from vacation,reishuto time

[whateverloomis]

Ok this might seem weird so im sorry about this 😭

Can you do a reader who has a blog of sorts and she posts about her interests (like horror, books, movies etc) and she sometimes posts pictures of her in langerie or naked but in a artistic way for the female gaze (for the girliesss) but she stays Anonymous (doesnt show her face).

She decides to tell billy about it and they have a little photoshoot together

Bonus: him reading the comments like:

Person: that guy is so hot

Billy: hehe *kicks feet*

Don't worry about weirdness here anon, the weirder the better ;) I imagined this during the Myspace era (early 2k,) because it was iconic asf 😩 Also, I changed up the comment part based on the picture I chose. Enjoy! <33

Warnings: Making out, voyeurism, choking, dry humping, touchy feely Billy, p in v, creampie, reader has long hair, reader has nipple piercings, revised August'24

Reader: AFAB (she, her,) third person and use of YN.

She was wearing a black lace see through bralette that showed just enough of her pierced nipples, a matching thong with a garter and thigh high socks. Her hair cascaded a little over her shoulders, just enough to show on the picture while still remaining anonymous.

YN snapped a few pictures in different poses; arching her back with her ass on display, kneeling down with her hands on her tits, and many other deliciously teasy positions.

From outside her window stood Billy Loomis. He was walking towards her house to crawl through her window and get his way with her like he did almost every night now. However, once he saw YN taking pictures in her lingerie he needed to enjoy the view from outside a little bit before showing himself to her.

Gosh, she looked so good posing for the camera. He wondered if she was going to send them to someone. If he was lucky enough to be the receiver of sed pictures. His imagination ran wild imagining what the shots looked like.

Billy bit his lip and sighed, he decided he had tortured himself enough and walked towards her window, adjusting his hard cock in his jeans before climbing up and sitting on the ledge.

"Quite a show you're putting on," he said, startling YN.

"Billy, what the fuck?!" She whisper screamed, conscious about her roommate downstairs.

Sighing in attempt to calm herself, she grabbed her black robe and began to put it on.

Billy let himself in and walked towards YN, grabbing her hands to stop her from closing the robe; "Don't even think about it, let me look at you baby," he said teasingly and ran his large hands down her waist to her hips, squeezing the flesh.

YN bit her lip and ran her hands through Billy's hair before pulling him in for a lingering kiss.

"Mm, what's all this for?" He asked her, removing the robe and throwing it on the bed.

"I um... Well, I have this blog where I post pictures of myself an-" - "Looking like this?" He interrupted and YN blushed at the teasy yet low-key degrading question. She loved it.

"It's artistic, not porn if that's what you're wondering," YN answered and Billy smirked at her explanation. Looking around the room, he saw some Polaroid pictures of herself in her so-called "artsy" positions and lingerie.

"What about these?" Billy walked towards her dresser and grabbed a few of the images.

"Oh, I sell those," YN explained and Billy raised an eyebrow in amusement.

"Quite the business you have here." He replied while slipping one of the Polaroids in his pocket. He'll definitely use it later.

YN chuckled and walked towards Billy. He immediately spread his legs and pulled her between them, placing one single peck on her lips before things got heated.

Billy laid her down on the soft bed and hovered over her, biting her lip softly before dipping his tongue inside her mouth, playing with her own. YN moaned at his methodical movements, Billy is a great fucking kisser and she couldn't get enough.

Suddenly, he pulled back and whispered; "Fuck."

"What is it?," YN asked, confusion lacing her words.

"We look really good," Billy said and pointed at YNs computer screen. She had left it on along with her camera since he decided to give her an unexpected surprise.

The sight got YN wet and she bit her lip when she felt Billy's cock twitch between her legs.

His large hands on her body looked delicious and she couldn't help but grind up against his hard on.

Billy followed her movements and they ended up dry humping on her bed. She was soaked and most likely ruined her thong but she didn't care.

"What if we take some pictures together?" Billy asked, his voice low in her ear.

YN gasped in excitement and immediately said yes.

•

The photoshoot session was intense. The couple couldn't get their hands off each other.

Billy grabbed YN everywhere and they took over 100 pictures together. They were going insane looking at each other on the screen, so much that they ended up fucking their brains out.

YN rode Billy's cock in front of the camera and ended up recording some of it too.

She bounced on his length and pulled his hair, hard. Billy had his hand around YNs throat choking her deliciously.

"You look so fucking good for the camera baby... Fuck," he whispered before cumming inside her throbbing pussy.

Billy pulled out and YN arched her back in order to give the camera a good view of his seed leaking out of her cunt.

•

After cleaning up and viewing all the pictures they took, the couple settled on a picture to post on YNs blog.

Not long after, the notifications started to increase. Comments and likes nonstop. YN had a large following and they were loving the new content.

"Check this comment out," YN told Billy.

"His hands look so good, I want them around my throat... Ugh!"

Billy chuckled and pretended that he didn't care about the compliment, but YN knew best. Not to mention the light blush that appeared on his cheeks.

"You love the praise, huh?," YN said teasingly and bit her lip.

"Shut up. I bet you agree with that comment," he said, trying to shift the conversation.

"You know I do," YN answered and kissed him once again.

[dattosdan]

Kris doesn't NEED to remove their soul.

So, this is a short one, something i was thinking about earlier today was, hey, kris moves a lot, even when they have the soul inside them don't they?

Let me show you a few examples of this, before i get into my reasoning.

These are the two moments leading up to them ripping their soul out, obviously they wouldn't be able to rip it out, if they couldn't move at all before hand.

This is kris defending susie of their own free will, implying, that they could maybe even FIGHT without us.

This is kris backing away from spamton on their own, to be fair, frisk also does this when omega flowey appears, so this might be instinctual and not of their own volition.

And finally, this is kris turning around AWAY from the player, perhaps to not show their face or emotions to us, theres also a scene from the weird route, where they turn around from us, and refuse to show us susie and noelle, but i'm kinda lazy so i didnt feel like grabbing that one.

The point i wanted to make here, was that kris has a LOT of autonomy, even when the soul is inside them, so why do they feel the need to rip out their soul at all? To risk DYING? They don't feel the need to rip out their soul in less dire circumstances, so why do they always do it at the end of a chapter?

I get the reason from a meta perspective, it's to show kris is doing these actions of their own volition, separate from the player, aka the soul.

But what's the in-canon reason?

I came up with a couple of my own explanations for it, if any of you have your own your more than welcome to add on.

My first explanation is as follows: This is SUPER meta but, maybe kris needs to TRIGGER a CUTSCENE in order to move around, think about it, in literally every other screenshot i showed you besides the ones where they rip out their soul, someone else had triggered a cutscene, and kris could move in it, maybe kris can ONLY move in a cutscenes as a protagonist, maybe ripping out their soul is the only way they can trigger such a thing, but like i said, this is pretty meta, so i would get if you don't believe this.

The second explanation is as follows: Maybe kris doesnt want us to SEE what they are doing, but could do it regardless of us being in them, this is the one that is least believable in my opinion, mostly because like, at the end of chapter 2, they arnt even trying to hide what they are doing from us, but i mean, they HAVE hidden stuff from us before, so it wouldn't exactly be out of character for them to do, maybe they thought we couldn't see inside the couch cushions?

The third, and final explanation i have, is as follows: Yes they can move with us in them, and has SOME degree of autonomy even while we are controlling them, but it's not enough to do what they WANT to do, this is probably the most believable, maybe they don't have FULL control over themselves when we are in them, only able to make minor movements or actions, and they NEED to rip out their soul to travel further, and do some other stuff like open dark fountains, after all, determination is ones very will, you wouldn't be able to open a dark fountain with someone ELSES will inside you, someone who doesn't WANT TO do that, could you?

Anyway, this is just a thought I had, sorry, I really thought this was gonna be shorter, but once I start typing, I can't really stop haha.

Uh, feel free to leave your own thoughts or ideas about this in comments or reblogs, sorry for not posting in so long, life has gotten... Busy, and I don't have as much free time as I used to.

[randum-famdoms]

HEY IMPORTANT POST ABOUT MY P5 FANFIC!!!!

It’s a long one so I’m adding a cut for people who don’t read my fic <3

TLDR: do you want a side fic which is a series of one-shots showing an alternate timeline of my main fic which includes the Royal characters Sumire and Maruki?

That fic would not be written for a while, due to time and other factors, but I want to gauge interest early on so I can make an outline

More details below ⬇️

—

So I don’t plan on including the Royal characters or yaldy/god (I don’t feel like googling how to spell his name) in my fic (dw I already have an explanation for the velvet room that doesn’t include the evil god) in my main fic

I have several reasons, but it all boils down to the fact that their storylines don’t fit well with my vision for the fics themes and plot. It would be interesting, but it would feel too much like trying to fit two separate fics together and would end up dragging both sides down and creating a worse overall whole. My fic is primarily about akechi and Akira’s stories, and that story ends at Shido. Adding on anything else would simply not work.

But I LOVE Sumire so so much, and maruki is fine I guess, so I’m debating on whether to include an alt-timeline side fic (wayyyyy down the line when I have time and at least 15 chapters pre written in the main fic) where I include Sumire and maruki. It would be like a one-shot series, since if I wrote a whole ass fix it would A) be way too fucking long, and B) really boring because not much would change between it and the main fic

I’d either post it all consecutively over a few weeks, or a new chapter alongside whatever chapter in the main fic lines up with the alt chapter in the timeline.

Also don’t plan on including yaldy except if it’s super vague and I don’t include the fight scene cause I think it’s boring and I hate writing fight scenes anyway.

To give an idea about what the fic would look like, here’s some ideas I’ve come up with for one shots in the side fic below:

—

Maruki’s dream lives for the mains (aka the canon PTs + Sumire + Mishima

maruki’s dream-verse waking up scenes

How Sumire meets akira and Mishima and they be fired her and introduce her to akechi and they become a big depressed dysfunctional family

Sumire persona awakening (it’d be different from canon)

Sumire being a sort of work-for-hire persona user that works with the main trio when they need more hands, but who doesn’t usually work with them since she’s so busy

Sumire accidentally being adopted by akechi and futaba as a third sibling (none of them are happy about it except Sumire even tho she’s not the one that instigated this dynamic)

Sumire becoming good friends with ryuji and shiho because she’s just so much fun to work out with and she makes the physical therapy tolerable (this ends up making her Ann’s favourite [after shiho of course])

Futaba high-key judging maruki because she remembers enough from her mom to know that he is NOT a qualified person to be talking about psychology, not to mention working with children as a therapist

Maruki tells Mishima to get more sleep and Mishima is soooo offended by that, and then after the dream-verse is even more offended because HELL FUCKING NO HE DOESNT WANT WHATEVER SLEEP THIS CREEP IS TRYING TO SELL HIM

—

I’ll include a shorter version of this post in the end notes of the upcoming chapter alongside a link to this post, but please let me know if you want to see this fic become a real thing.

Regardless it’ll be a WHILE, I’m already super busy and adding a whole new fic on top of that will be a big deal, and I haven’t even got an outline yet plus most of these one shots would take place a whiles a way down the timeline and I’d rather have a grasp on what that would look like in the main fic before I add a second layer of canon divergence on top of that.

Anyway sorry for the long post, love y’all!

[klayfruit]

i am really curious with the lore you're making! this is a bit of a strange question, but what happened to his teeth? you mentioned that the candymanification happened inside out and he had a fever. how "inside" is a person's mouth? even if it doesn't count as being inside a person, his mouth must of transformed at some point so

did his teeth fall out? did his tongue melt? could he still breathe like a normal person at that point? does your candyman have bones? or is it solid yellow? if only the inside was transformed, and if the candymanness is sort of melty or malleable, does that mean that if you mushed his arm it would indent? i love body horror and the question of teeth came to my mind when i looked at your art again

HI OKAY IM SO SORRY IT TOOK LIKE A MONTH FOR ME TO FINISH THIS ASK i adore thinking abt this topic so much but like halfway thru writing this response i got so excited and had to walk away to stim but ended up forgetting to finish this. anyway i did it everything written here is from months ago except the last paragraph

these are all rly good questions bc i dont know most of them!!! i was thinking earlier and i think i came to the conclusion that the mutation progressively melts fran’s bones and turns it “candy” along with his skin. as fran became more mushy and melty the barriers between organs, bones, skin, etc (eyes being the only exception) kind of all melted together and became the same thing. his teeth got all gooed up and melted/became one with his mouth. same with his tongue, it melted with his mouth. though after the mutation was complete and candyman learned how to work with and transform his body better, he just reforms his tongue sometimes like for comedic effect.

to go further on this topic of francis/candyman (actually im gonna call mid-mutation of him frandyman thats funny) learning how to transform his body, at first he struggled heavily with breathing since his throat+lungs began closing and melting in on themselves. eventually though he was able to transform his body to compensate for this and somehow find another way to get air to his brain, or he just opened his throat back up again im still not 100% sure on this part.

candyman doesnt exactly have bones, but his body does kind of have layers to it. during frandyman the mutation would spread in a red->blue->yellow gradient, and the reds+blues are still in his body despite not being visible. the red is the first layer and is EXTREMELY hard so it practically acts as bones, blue being the second layer and being not as tough, and yellow being the third and having the texture+softness of skin (though still feeling like Not Skin). i have an explanation for why candy’s mouth is red despite it being the first layer but idk how to explain it and id like draw a diagram of it but itd make me look insane So. Come to your own conclusions . also candys able to change the texture, malleability , etc of his body and its how hes able to walk through walls.

during frandyman his body was VERY melty and malleable and he hadnt learned how to control his body yet. whole limbs would just melt, fall off, get disfigured, merge with other limbs, etc without him even doing anything. though because of, Brain Instinct? not sure but it would automatically grow frandy’s limbs back without him knowing how to or that he’s even doing it. when he became candyman he could regrow his limbs much much easier, it all just kind of comes down to how well he could control his body and how it progressed during the mutation.

a plothole i noticed in Candymans Fucked Up Body is that im not entirely sure how his blood and organs would work. i considered his organs melting entirely and his entire body being The Organ That Can Perform Everything The Other Organs Could Perform but that sounded lame. how his brain would work during all of this is the biggest one to me, because i imagine it was heavily impacted and disfigured but shouldnt be entirely melted because the man needs a brain somehow to live! the main thing im going with right now is that the red layer of his body isnt like, a solid chunk of red, but like a hard HARD shell and it protects the organs who are now like massively fucked up and disfigured but somehow still pumpin. i may change this eventually, but its what im going with rn so ! blood is also interesting for me because there’s no space in between each layer for blood to be stored, and the layers themselves dont have blood in them and are completely solid. so for now came up with that his skin kind of acts as his blood, when it’s cut it kind of just. melts on the inside and seeps out of the cut. also of COURSE his blood is silly colored (red, blue, yellow again)

also since this ask was from like a month ago ive decided that candy’s mutation had symptoms similar to like, a mix of rabies and radiation poisoning. both in the sense of once the person has it they have no idea they have it until it comes into full effect, the only sign for like the first week being mild sickness. ALSO fun fact he physically cant sweat since his skin is Not Skin. his sweat builds up underneath his skin and just causes his actual skin to become all mushy and squishy. Anyway tldr they fucked this guy up

[inumatsu]

hey, do you know why so many wlws and lesbians have osomatsu as their favorite? from what i've seen a decent amount of wlws/lesbians really like him but like. what does osomatsu have that draws wlws and lesbians to him (i'm also unfortunately an osomatsu liker, i have him as my third favorite matsu along with totty but i'm not wlw, i'm asexual tho if that counts)

OH MY GOD I AM. SO SO SORRY FOR ANSWERING THIS ASK SO LATE I GOT SO BUSY WITH COLLEGE WORK BUT IM ON SUMMER BREAK NOW!!!!!! this got crazy crazy long but tl;dr hes got the stupid loser babygirl vibes

fair warning i havent thought abt ososan in a hot second lol but. ive never really… thought about it before this ask? i just thought it was a funny little phenomenon. at least for me, i like osomatsu the most bc hes the most relatable out of all the sextuplets for me (HUGE RED FLAG HORRIBLE I KNOW) but hes just like me fr. i love characters i can kin. hes got like. sloppy dyke energy lol. like my own flesh and blood mother upon seeing my osomatsu dakimakura cover for the first time said “oh he looks like you!” so um. yeah

BUT ANYWAYS!!! i think the best explanation would be lesbians love osomatsu the same way nyaa chan falls in love with osomatsu in that one s3 skit. when that episode aired literally every osomatsu liker i knew posted how they felt targeted. we know he sucks! hes a gross pervert with no redeeming traits! hes the absolute shittiest one out of them all! but like... we know lol. oso likers enjoy that episode the way no one else can. hes far from the perfect man, and thats what makes him lovable. and of course nyaa realizes she shouldnt date someone like him and i would hope that oso fans sapphic or not realize that too lol.

not that dating ANY of the sextuplets would be good but, osomatsus literally the worst. thats the fun abt liking fictional characters!!! like the beni mixer episode he looks fun to shoot the shit with, even if you like him or not! hes fun and he makes me laugh. he is roger rabbit to me.

like this post abt pathetic slug women? this is how i feel about osomatsu

hes not a “man” to me. hes my babygirl. hes just cute and silly and funny! and isnt that all you need in a man? he encapsulates the feeling of “just a guy” the most to me. his personality is literally beer and gambling, he doesnt get a cute symbol to be associated with in merch lol. and dont even get me started on osomatsu angst analysis lesbians love a guy with problems

of course i dont speak for the whole sapphic osomatsu community but like. out of all the brothers, osomatsu fits all those text posts abt talking about fictional male characters in increasingly weird ways the most. like idk go through my #me and osomatsu tag. theres so much cute aggression towards osomatsu lol. genuinely tho the bond between lesbians and their weird male favs is unexplainable

[sunshinetoshi]

Which flower/plant do you associate your moots with?

okay this idea is so cute omg ty. honestly i don’t know much about flowers/plants besides saying ‘pretty!!’ every time i see one HAHA so i had to look up a bunch so now i’m very soft. ANOTHER WAY OF SAYING THESE MIGHT BE RANDOM BUT I STILL PUT THOUGHT INTO THEM AND IT MADE ME SOFT. i tried to include as many moots as possible (but there are still moots i missed bc i’m shy and we don’t interact as much or i feel like a bother asdajkf sorry lovelies ahh). 

this is me dropping the prettiest bouquets to you all each with a lil kith heheh. ily all 💐💐😙😙

@daichis-kitty - sunflowers (you’re my sunshine bubba heheh plus i know you love ‘em so automatic association). these make me so happy just like you dooooo. personally sunflowers are just so iconic and so are youuu

@tetsunormous - string-of-pearls. okay i LOVE these sm they might be my fave succulent. they make me giggle bc they look like green peas BAHAHA but i also think they’re soo pretty and they make me so happy. that giddiness i feel for them is similar to how i feel for you bestie oooo. okay but also lavender bc purple hearts for you forever

@luvbub - dandelions but before they’re fuzz-on-a-sticks (yellow fits the happy you make me plus the crafty flower crowns and you’re crafty aksdjfh). but even when they're fuzz you make me laugh and smile just like the fuzzies lol

@daichidaichidaichi - black velvet petunia. babe if you haven’t seen these look them up i am in love. petunias themselves and even the name are cute like you but the black captures your theme and i am obsessed.

@gg9183 - willow tree. very romantic vibes which i’ve always gotten from you bb. like imagine a date on a little lake in a row boat. ugh my heart. yeah those are the vibes. these are just so so pretty to me idk. for me your personality embodies an unmatched aesthetic. that doesnt even make sense but i hope it does pLS

@love-oikawa - feather grass but when lavenders grow between them?? very specific HAHA but i looove the look it makes me want to run through a meadow where your fingertips are brushing them and your giggling. idk something very cinematic and then add your s/o. yup. those are my hannah vibes.

@osamus-wife - pothos plant. okay these are the ones i see on ig/pinterest and they’re so aesthetic and i associate them with a person who has their stuff together (is a hard worker) and a person who has style and taste (like your taste in rb’s asdjf immaculate) and i see these things with youuu <33

@sunalma - wisteria. in the lakes by taylor swift there’s a line with wisterias and that whole song is the aura i get when i read your work. like the words just blow me away and i feel so lifted when i read it?? just beautiful bb. and your soul is beautiful too!! also purple for your theme heheh. also pretty flowers for pretty you angel

@xomiya - yerba mate bc i drink guayaki yerba mate when i need to stay up and given your body clock -> yerba mate <33 HAHA but you’re also so florally in my heart and head so also sweet peas my sweet pea soul sis

@catwithangerissues - bonsai tree. i know it’s random but i think it fits pLS. okay one reason is bc i think you’re fun (and slightly chaotic and i love it) and that’s the joy i get when i see those fisherman figurines in a bonsai tree planter thing (is this just me?? ahh) i also think you’re really cool and to me bonsais are so cool. like in general but also how old they can get it’s so cool what!! also your theme is green so my mind went green

@targaryens-blog - bat flower. these are strong and pretty looking flowers that i admire and those are things i think about you and your blog bb. the vibes of these are just amazing woahh. but your sweetness also gives me daisy vibes bc daisies make me so warm and happy so you get two flowers aksdjf

@cubbluv - spruce tree. are these christmas trees?? yes. but the warm fuzzy happy of christmas is like the feeling i have with you. and i will always associate green with you from your theme when we first became moots heheh. also?? i can’t remember but didn’t you saw you liked to pick up pine cones?? if not picking pine cones is cute so i still think it fits aksjdf ily melody heheh

@amjustagirl - southern magnolia tree. i’ve seen one of these trees a while back and they are just so memorable. they just have a unique feeling where you want to sit under the shade of them forever and take in the breeze. and that’s how i feel with your work <33

@kodzkn - marigolds. the slightly orange-y ones. they remind me of your theme and pfp heheh. also whenever i see these irl i go “marigolds!!” which is the energy i have when i see your user on my dash or notifs aksjdf

@notcurrentlyactive - chamomile. okay this one i can't explain but i love how cute the flowers are and i love the tea and you are just so kind and warm they radiate the same energy?? heheh <33

@iwaizumini - ranunculus/buttercup flowers. they’re just so bright and come in so many colors and are pretty just like you!! i love these sm and they make me so happy when i see them so i think they’re a great fit for you. heheh love you bb <33

@shoyotime - wishbone flower. bestie i’ll be honest. i looked up ‘clown flower’ out of curiosity AND THESE POPPED UP. but they’re so cute like you and the purple matches your theme so it actually works out BAHAHA. no but fr you make me so so happy and ilysm so also hydrangeas bc i think these are unmatched pretty flowers. there’s just something about them.

@tsukkisfatsimp - jade plant. okay hear me out bb. this explanation has ~layers~ okay first i love succulents and i love you. simple but effective (especially when i mean it with my whole chest). second the reddish tint on the ends reminds me of your red tsukki theme from back then. and third these grow HECKA fast just like you are on here and it makes me so happy and proud bb heheh

@hvnlydmn - calla lillies. okay i cant pick between the white ones or the black ones but for me they exude hot girl energy bb. either these are red roses. same reason HAHA

@u-make-my-heart-tsumtsum - camellias. pretty and pink and now match your theme heheh. BUT if i’m being honest it’s bc they appear in naruto a lot and when we became moots was when you first deep dived into naruto so that association will probs stay bb akjsdf

@floralkawa - baby’s breath. i think these are my favorite flowers. but just like you they give off the sweetest and softest vibes and they make me smile whenever i see them <33

@lovelytarou - canterbury bells. the blue-ish ones remind me of your theme HAHA. i’ve already told you how much i love your blog but you are also so sweet and funny (pls your tags give me life) and these flowers amuse me and make me smile bc they’re bell-shaped so i’m matching them to you. askdjf okay slightly a reach but bb look how pretty they are!!

@izhyperfixates - hollyhocks. they are just so soft and bright and lovely like you and your blog!! and i can totally see you and kita growing them in the garden you two have oooo

@marshieee - delphiniums. the blue of your theme is just so iconic i love it sm. also these are just so pretty!!

@pixelwisp - forget-me-nots. i know your theme is no longer blue but i still think of blue when i see you on the dash asjdf. also these have the cutest name and i think your user is so cute heheh

[bakugoukatsuki-rising]

I'm. The new covers, op. The new covers. Gosh. Both of them hold so much symbolism. And technically they both are canon, they are both original ideas that could perfectly be valid. Horikoshi simply found something better. But anyways, I'm going to go ahead and ramble about it because Im- Op, prepare for a long ask! Hope you like it!

So!

On the one where Katsuki's the one in the picture, he's not on his knees like he is in the other two covers. Instead, he has his face down, body forward, one hand on one leg, the other one holding out for something...He's bowing. Bowing in Japanese culture is a pretty big deal. Hes not just tilting his head a bit, his head and body are on full on commitment.

Such a tilted bow means a LOT, specially from THIS guy, Mr dont let anyone walk in front of me. Even more when hes not just bowing, but accepting such an open display of given help, Mr shonen anime lone wolf. Accepting something he always has trouble admitting to. Accepting the past, accepting the wrongs. Accepting Izukus help means so much, and that's what these three covers have in common.

His hand is sctretching out. He's ready to say yes to that hand out in the air.

(Ps. I wonder if he's watching his own reflection on the water in this panel, as well?)

Hes in middle of the picture with those childhood friend at the back, which means audience. It means letting people see what hes done, what he's sorry for. He is being open and exposed and vulnerable. That's no fighting stance.

Remember guys, in case you haven't noticed before, Horikoshi puts lots of metaphorical value in his manga and on his covers. Sometimes you've got to dig in deep and think to get the bigger picture. And in this case, the bigger picture screams regret and wanting to make things right from the start.

This cover occurs in the past, at the moment where everything started, and Katsuki fully remembers this. Katwuki has thought of this, is thinking about this. He's had eye bags for gods sake, he's clearly troubled by all of what it means.

These three covers are the visual explanation of what's going on inside Katsuki's head, because this is clearly focused on him and his perspective.

(Ps. Rivers symbolise the massage of time. If that doesnt add to everything else, I dont know what to tell you.)

So! Next!

Wow, if this isnt one of my favourite things ever. Okay. Christ.

I have two options here. Scratch that, three options. Scream into the void, scream into this post, or actually make a good presentation of my inner turmoil. I'll have to go by the third option. (Haha. Just like horikoshi did. Dont # me, I'm funny in my head.)

This cover melted my insides, froze them all over, and hit me with them like a hammer.

I know they're kids, but let me get this straight-so kids seriously look at their friends with these looks in their eyes and think "ah, yes. This is my very good friend. This gentle smile and kind look I'm giving him as if he was my whole world? Well, hes just a very good friend."

I looked at my childhood crush this way, I dont know what to tell you.

Anyway, let's actually jump to the information at hand.

This panel seems like it's making a reference to what Katsuki wishes could have been. And if that's not absolutely soul-crushing...this cover is Katsuki's feelings, guys. These are probably his very thoughts. This scene has gone through Katsuki's head at some point.

We've got Izuku in his stuck up pose all over again, in just an awkward angle. It's like katsuki isnt looking AT this katsuki right now, but at the spot where the actual past Katsuki, at some point, was. As if this Isuku is frozen in time. Dont believe too much in this paragraph, I still have my doubts about that, but I feel it's a possibility. Izukus eyes seem to be focused on the water, while Katsuki is just the tiniest bit back, reaching for Izukus hand. And gosh.

I dont think I've ever seen older NOR child Katsuki have this look plasted into his face before. He's...sheepish. Kindly, awkwardly sheepish. No hate, no anger, no shame, no nothing. His face is clear and sweet and has this "Whoops. You got me. But thanks." kind of expression on.

The hand behind his head, just the tiniest but embarassed? That little smile? It's all so soft.

Rambling about softness though- I really liked the hand scene in this particular panel. If you close up your view, you realise that theres no effort to pull anyone out of nowhere. In this panel, they are simply holding hands in frozen time for no purpose at all.

Katsuki has his hand around Izuku...simply holding there.

Again, because the angle is awkward, it's kind of messy, but you get the point.

It's all simply beautiful. Horikoshi clean likes give me life.

And lastly. The actual cover.

I screeched so hard when I saw this. My first instinct when seeing this for the first time was to straight up go trigger happy fingers and write about it to my friends. Christ.

Everything is so...SOft. horikoshi made a good decision by mixing both previous drawings in one. We have parts of the two covers in one, which is amazing. In this one, Katsuki isnt alone, as Izuku's there too. But we dont have the audience either. Probably because the main focus on this panel is no one else except them two.

Again, Katsuki looks like he's bowing, but instead of looking all the way down, he's in the middle. Not looking at Izuku nor looking at the ground, like it shows in the previous covers. Instead, Horikoshi found a middle ground. He's looking at his hand. At the gesture.

Hes not holding hands quite yet, but his hand is there. At arms reach. Not close enough but there. Wanting.

Theres so much regret and again, softness.

Again, like you Op said a bit bad, the angle is off here. This is present Katsuki remembering his past. The angle is off because this Izuku isnt holding out for our Katsuki. This is a memory. A wish. Katsuki's wish.

(Ps. Izukus trousers drenched in the rivers water. This detail was so nice. It's a subtle action that describes Izukus characterization so much. Izuku went in the river with Katsuki in mind, not caring if he got his clothes soaked in the process too. For Izuku, only Katsuki was there. And for Katsuki, only Izuku is.

As a plus, I can't believe the cover of this is literally called Bakugou Katsuki rising. They named the entire thing after that one chapter. Actually, I very much, totally believe it. It's the moment so many people have been waiting for, after all. The moment so many scenes have been amounting for, little by little.

*dreamy sigh*

Thanks for reading, I hope you enjoyed this little thing, I had to get it out of my system and dont want to bother my dear friends anymore than needed.

Have a good day, OP! I'll stay updated!

You kinda just...took my heart and curb stomped it, not gonna lie. Your observations are so beautiful and so accurate. The sketch with little Bakugou taking Izuku’s hand is so...raw, and yeah, that expression is definitely one of love. Those eyes, the way he is HOLDING Izuku’s hand, not TAKING it. He isn’t taking it to stand up, he is literally just...holding it. 

That isn’t the way you take someone’s hand when you’re trying to pull yourself up. It’s an awkward angle and just...wouldn’t work right. No, he is literally just holding his hand, and that’s exactly what Bakugou wishes he did all that time ago. He wishes that he not only took Deku’s hand, but held onto it. Held it as if it were something precious, something to be cared for and protected. 

These are Bakugou’s true feelings expressed in these drawings, and I think Horikoshi released them on purpose, to show us more of what he wanted Bakugou to be feelings through all of this. Since after all, we know that Bakugou expresses himself in action, not so much words. And because Horikoshi is an absolute genius, he thought to give us these other glimpses in how he feels through these actions. 

And the other sketch with him bowing his body to Izuku, and the way the log looks like it’s on his back with his ‘friends’ on top of it. 

The pressure of needing to be the coolest, the strongest, the best. Those kids put that kind of pressure on him, even if they never realized it. They encouraged his behavior and fed his ego, and it never allowed him to see how he was wrong. But now he is realizing it, and he is bowing himself in light of that acknowledgement. He is lowering his head and putting his pride away, so he can get back what he lost all those years ago; the opportunity to take Izuku’s hand.

To take the hand of the only one of those kids that ever loved him unconditionally. Who never pressured him or expected him to be invincible. Who saw all of his flaws and was completely prepared to support him despite all of it. The only one. 

I’m just a mess over all of this, and I am so incredibly thankful to Horikoshi for creating this beautiful relationship. AND IN A SHOUNEN MANGA, NONETHELESS!!  

Thank you friend, for your beautiful thoughts. I think they’re spot on, and I am so emotional all over again because of this. 

[transsexualbloodlust]

i keep seeing posts about how jackles isn't homophobic but it's actually weirder and i get that he isn't homophobic and he's just got weird stuff going on but i don't know what the weird stuff...is? sorry if this is the wrong place but i was hoping someone could explain it to me lol

oh FUCK yeah, my brain thrives off of explaining spn stuff, okay someone pls correct me if i’m wrong but let’s get into the LoreTM

Okay so Jackles is almost definitely not homophobic, he played a bi poly character for a while, i don’t remember the name of the show but it was pre spn so like it was 90’s/early 2000’s

anyway,

stuff starts getting weird since season 1, because like there’s no real explanation for his acting choices other than that he was actively making dean seem gayer. Like the scene where sam says that dean is “kind of butch,” dean is supposed to tell sam to fuck off, and instead we get this weird smile thing to suggest that he is, as sam says, overcompensating for something?? And then Cas comes in and it’s like he has insane amounts of chemistry with this man and Continues to actively make things gayer. like all of the face touches we saw?? a jackles jacting joices they usually weren’t in the script, like editors had to cut stuff out because jensen was making his scenes with cas too gay.

And all of this could definitely be like normal behavior BUT

He’s always been vocal about opposing Gay/Bi readings of deans, the most recent on being 2 0 1 8, like fucking 2018???? (that was the ?No. situation). I mean his distaste for bi dean is obviously to the point where they had to ask his permission for cas to be gay around dean and like it DOESNT MAKE SENSE. Why would he play dean as gayer and then not follow through???? why sow and not reap????

and the idea is that it probably comes down to a mixture of 2-3 things:

1) his first interaction with shipping involved death threats and wincesties generally being awful to him and his wife so i can definitely see that making u never want to discuss shipping ever again and a lot of bi/gay readings of dean involve destiel, this is the most likely offender. Especially since it became one of and eventually The biggest ship on the show

2) as u may know he is a dean kinnie, he’s shown (and talked about it) time and time again that he can’t really view dean from a third party perspective and only understands what dean understands, and fundamentally dean is probably not aware that he is bi and in love with cas, so jackles isn’t. I genuinly do think this one hold merit because that man needs therapy but it is on the insane side

3) i’m sorry for this but we have to mention rpf/s, essentially the theory is that jensen and misha r together and jackles got scared of people realizing either that he likes misha or that he likes men, i think there’s something to be said about cockles but i think it’s more likely that he accidentally played dean as bi and then got insecure about people finding out something about him because as I said, dean kinnie.

anyway the tldr is that it’s weird because he plays dean as bi in like very obvious ways but like refuses to acknowledge it because it hits too close to home wich is incredibly funny of him

[collisiondiscourse]

i have decided i am now going to blow up your inbox bc i csn i’m sorry codi focnnf

b u t!! anyway i’m going to rambling abt my new dad for all au [whixh was the au i sent you that ask abt]

alrighty so all might is now midoriya’s dad. that’s a thing. i like to think that inko and toshinori were high school sweethearts who broke up after graduation but met again when all might was called to recuse some hostages and inko was one of them!! anywho all might recuses her, they go on a coffee date, realize they’re still in love and start again

they get married and have izuku, who keeps inko’s maiden name [midoriya is now inko’s maiden name bc i do what i want]. he’s the cutest baby who has inko’s green hair, but has one blue and one green eye! [these are /important/] inko and all might talk abt maybe giving izuku all for one when he’s older, but they decide against it bc they don’t know if he’ll have a quirk or not

spoiler!! bitch baby has a quirk!! he gets a quirk that’s so much different than inko’s quirk and !!! ahhh!!! the basic explanation is that all might’s all of one genes mixed and then “corrupt” inko’s like 3 generation quirk-having genes or smth and izu has a very, very complex quirk now. it’s called astron, and astron allows him to fucking astral project into the center of the university and shit chxnc

astron works two different ways: using his blue eye he can project other people into his own personal astral plane and do whatever he wants. while the person’s physical body is still where it was, their mind is in the astral plane. if he uses his green eye, he can project himself to his astral plane and fuck around without consequences!!

[there’s an untold third ability of astron using both of his eyes, but izuku tried doing that when he first got his quirk and immediately fell into a coma for like a month? it was bad and his mind couldn’t handle the stress and dipped lol]

ANYWAY, izuku grows up with a bomb ass quirk and still has his kacchan with him thru his childhood so things are a lot different than canon? the wonder duo are little shitheads together and i love them, they wreck havoc and i love them

i have more ideas for this story but this is all i have for now, codi this is so long i’m sorry i’m blowing up ur inbox 🥺😭

me opening my askbox and seeing the length of this au: holy shit

me reading the actual whole au: HOLY SHIT

AJ I LOVE THIS HIGHKEY!!! I LOVE THE IDEA OF OP DEKU W A FUCKED UP QUIRK JUST TERRIFYING EVERYONE HE COMES ACROSS!!!! heterochromia is SO so good as a character design element and i LOVE THE WAY THIS IS IMPLEMENTED YELLS. I WANNA DRAW THIS SO BAD!!! THIS LOOKS SO COOL

(serious writing/plot below - blood and vomit mention)

oh god and now im imagining deku like. being this extremely feral and annoying lil shit whos extremely powerful and now bakugous got someone on his level so hes a lot more humble as hes growing up but also him and deku are the?? BESTEST OF FRIENDS. and i imagine when bakugou is being a little shit deku just. astral projects him out of his body for a while and apologizes to whoever kacchan yelled at LMFAO---bakugou comes back to his body and is all like “....fucks sake stop doing that”

AND THEN omfgkjfds imagine morally grey deku who does whatever he can to win?? he knew he wouldnt get into UAs hero course fair and square (all might offered him a recommendation but he declined because he wanted to get there on his own with kacchan) because robots didnt have souls he could astral project so he practices his quirks limits like YEARS prior and he tells bakugou about it but never rlly shows him but on the day of the entrance exam?

he shows up. everything goes as normal and he finishes the written exams and then moves on to the practical exam (still seperated from kacchan like in canon) and like. Every one goes dashing forward and deku doesnt really try to beat anyone. He waits until theyre all in the center engaging with robots when he walks to the center of the room.

and he sees the zero pointer in the distance.

“THE ZERO-POINTER’S HERE!” He yells and points at the gigantic mech heading their way. All at once everyone’s heads whip up to catch sight of the robot, enraptured by its sheer size and power. 

As they all look to one direction, Deku makes eye contact with them and smiles.

All at once, every single participant in the area goes limp. Astron throws their souls into the astral plane with little fanfare and everyone watches in awe and annoyance as their bodies uselessly crumple to the ground from the outside. The green-haired boy is suddenly given free reigns of the arena and they seethe as one by one he deactivates or disables robots that were once under their purview.

(What some of the smarter ones notice however, is the way he seems to be leaving some stray 3 pointers untouched... almost as if he was doing the calculations in his head as he goes... on how to ensure the number one spot while others can still score points...?)

One by one however, they start struggling and reaching to reconnect with their bodies. Their gleaming bright souls bob up and down with frenzied energy and Deku feels it. He feels it like itches on his skin and goosebumps that turn into hills that dance up and down his back. He feels it like he feels his limit reaching.

Its still around 10 minutes though before he actually loses control and everyone comes back to their bodies. His quirk times out and almost like its angry, the astral plane takes his body in exchange for the dozens he kept in there. He gets sucked through and passes out while everyone else runs and destroys the remaining bots. It doesn’t matter though, because he knows he’s racked up enough points to stay on top. He lets himself rest and observes the blue-haired tall guy with engines who contemplates carrying Deku’s body to safety.

Until, he sees her.

Just under some rubble and very close to getting crushed by the Zero-Pointer’s foot, Deku spots a brown-haired young girl that he recalls has some kind of floating quirk. He sees as everyone runs past her, prioritizing their own safety instead of hers.

He makes a decision.

Quickly--recklessly, a familiar gruff voice says in his ear--he forces himself back into his body and looks around. He runs to the girl and attempts to dig her out from the rubble before she gets crushed. The robot comes ever closer.

Using the little strength and flexibility he’s learnt from years of sparring with Kacchan, Deku abandons her in favor of climbing up the broken concrete and metal to meet the robot’s visor. He knows he won’t save her by digging her out of there, but by god is he gonna let her get injured without a fight. These robots weren’t designed to kill, but they were designed to destroy.

Focus. Focus and listen to what’s around you, Izu-kun.

The world around him reduces to tunnel-vision and suddenly Deku is face to face with the Zero-Pointer. It stops, as if calculating how to discard of Deku without hurting him severely with its own strength.

Everything has life in it. You only need to focus and look for it.

Izuku Midoriya looks at the robot.

In a whirlwind of blue and green, he reaches inside of himself and searches for life. Cold steel and hard-wired code meet his gaze and he plunges even deeper. 

Focus.

Then all at once, everything in his visions snaps into sudden clarity, like he’s never seen before. He feels everything. Sees Everything. Smells, tastes, hears--and he hears how the metal beneath him bends and groans. He feels how it winces and shudders. He sees it as it opens its maw and its visor bends in a facsimile of eyes, pleading him as if asking how?

The robot beneath him comes to life and stumbles back.

Quickly, he scrambles to the nearest ledge which happens to be a broken support beam. Distantly, he thinks he feels his arm being sliced open on the edge of it and the warmth of blood streaming down his side as he nearly falls. 

“HEY! YOU WITH THE ENGINES!” He hoarsely screams to the still remaining, slack-jawed contestants. “I CAN’T KEEP THE ZERO POINTER DOWN FOR LONG! GO HELP THE GIRL AND TAKE HER TO SAFETY NOW!”

With a sudden burst of energy, the fellow participants start taking others out from the rubble while the blue-haired boy helps the brunette he was protecting earlier. As he watches them clear the rubble to drag her out, he feels a pang.

Who am I? a lost voice calls out. It’s raspy and almost-robotic sounding and only he can hear it. Where am I? What am I?

And Deku’s vision flickers.

In and out, he sees flashes through eyes that aren’t his. He hears voices that are simultaneously faraway and way too close for comfort. The world tugs at the sides of his perspective and a strain is pulling at the back of his head tearing his brain to shreds. He doesn’t know what he’s focusing or straining on, except that its working and keeping the zero-pointer down.

He grits his teeth. “Hurry the hell up! i can’t do this any longer--”

Bursts of pain appear behind his mismatched eyes and he wants to scream so bad and if he were looking any clearer he’d see the way that the zero-pointer thrashes on the ground in time with the pounding on his skull. Bile crawls up the back of his throat and Deku screams.

“SHE’S CLEAR! YOU CAN LET GO NOW, MIDORIYA-SAN.”

Izuku lets go and his vision goes black.

[smallestclowninthecircus]

Season 3 notes popping off

due to my desire to not completely fail all my classes this year i made myself slow down significantly while listening to this season, and the fact that the other person i'm listening along with had to catch up. We've managed to convert several other people to start listening and its pretty great.

ep 81: what does it even mean to be chosen by one of them? And if he was chosen by the eye. we know Gertrude wasnt? Because she cut the eyes out of the magazines?

ep 82: elias lmao. I understand why people like him so much bahshdhdk i thought he was gonna snitch on Jon but he didnt so he's fine. Ok but how do we think he knew all that stuff. Idk probably just institute connections. I love the fact that the recorder just wants to record stuff randomly bjahsjdhd. Elias feels a lot like Michael in the sense that he knows more than he should and talks in a way that implies he just wants to wait and see how things play out for his own benefit. I understand him knowing the things that happened but his description of her emotions implies something paranormal. Maybe he's connected to one of the entities. Which one I cannot guess.

ep 83: did a file get delivered randomly to the place he's staying at? Probably elias lmao. He thinks the mannequin is related to the stranger. Idk I would believe it.

ep 84: worms? I know he says earth worms but idk. Again? Is she making gordon golems out of trash? Martin popping off. You can tell the statements get to him more that they get to Jon. How come martin is so mad about it? I want to assume he just doesnt want her to get stuck there but idk. Jude Perry. The calliope organ. Jon heard a circus in one of the last episodes

ep 89: he's talking to perry? Like jude Perry? He says ... God? Is that what it is? Lmao. The Desolation. Jon is tired of ppl being vague and not telling him stuff lmao. Oh God Jon is so confused. Compel her? Is she assuming he has some kind of power? Does he have powers? Hmm. im agreeing with jon here please jesus christ why does everyone have to be so cryptic. Just say what you mean. "maybe you get an itchy eye" bahasjkdfklsjdf girl what. Agnes saved her? Oh this is the girl from the cafe story? So theres the Cult of the Lightless Flame? They worship whatever entity this is? The Desolation? Why do they all seem like they sorta worship her then? Is Gretchen gonna die oh god. fuckin michael. a different michael aaah. i see. dont do it shes gonna burn you. sir. please. sir dont you dare do- WHAT DID I SAY what did you think was gonna happen hhh.

ep 90: try to make it less obvious you're trying to get fired big T. Elias that doesnt sound like the most healthy thing to do. oh dear is this gonna be triggering for me. uuuuuh. uuuuuuuuuh. doesnt seem like it ok gonna keep listening. Jared. hmmmmm. Ok we've seen Keay and hotner or whatever his name was.

ep 91: Michael Crew. Oh is this the lightning scar guy. Mister jon sir did you just die. No? God everyone is so fuckin cryptic. Say normal things please. They all just like to go on about pain and agony and j e s u s c h r i s t we get it you got hurted by whatever thing. So theyre avatars? question mark? Jude Perry is an avatar of The Desolation? hhhh fractals. thats a spiral thing innit. Yup. messing with your perceptions. God they all talk about feeding their god and feeding that which feeds them and. hh what does that meann. Leave big J. please. uh oh. is it daisy? how come he has the web lighter still? the tape recorder just turns on sometimes you know how it is. So he can compel people? not that he knows it obviously but. a bit wack. powers go brr i guess? If the eye just wants knowledge i guess he feeds it by getting the statements? b/c i doubt it wants him to murder ppl or whatever.

ep 92: elias you all knowing fuck what do you know. (i guess all given what i just said) Lukas. Heard of them before. Mordecai Lukas. Loneliness. The lonely even. Jonah Magnus. Elias ur sounding like a bit of a dickhead rn. lmao jon's just like "i dont care" elias what is ur deal. Why does he want to tie her in. ohh i see. lmao theyre all just like "elias why" The Unknowing lol seems very much like something the eye wouldnt like. lol elias is gettin all philosophical. what does it really mean to be human. this still doesnt answer why gertrude wanted to destroy the archives tho.

ep 93: bahsjdfh he seems so dead inside rip. awww admiral. i love him already. ghh breacon and hope. purple mold. doesnt sound like anything we've seen so far. I think the funniest explanation for breacon and hope is that they dont actually serve the stranger they just kinda happen to be a random neutral party that cart around random spooky entity related stuff. ooooh. when we hear the slight static of the tape recorder it's cuz he's compelling ppl.

ep 94: the end! listen man they were all just grayed up for 4/13.

ep 95: the end also? death but also savagery/ animalistic shit. aww martin. lmao becerra. she's just been chillin in the corner.

ep 96: return to sender. haha minecraft go brr. prediction: breacon and hope? yup there we go. jon why is there an echo. are you in a stairwell? is he gonna eat it- yup. how did i call it. unsure abt what theyre talking about but ok. they kidnapped someone? Sarah Baldwin. ooooh that guy.

ok im just putting this here so i have notes for when nicholas gets to this part. It seems like (from jon's conversation with jude perry) that the desolation and the eye are kinda at odds with eachother? like i guess not directly but it seems like they dont really vibe? so how could be with both. Cuz if he has the heat powers and shit then we know he's an avatar of the desolation. but then why does he have so much eye imagery. also he got burned intentionally? like jude did when she went on her monologue about the feeling of burning? but then why did he wear the eye pendant. it stops him from being burned all the way which seems like he's not fully accepting the fire or whatever.

Nooooo I lost like a bunch of my notes rip. I keep forgetting to save.

Ep 104: tim gives a coherent statement without jon even being there. Ugh. Fucking robert smirk. Dont like him. Joey. Dont recognize the name. The show must go on. Clown. The spooky circus?

ep 105: total war... shogun 2? jon is just understanding languages again. "if i understood mandarin or cantonese" are you sure you dont big man?

ep 106: havent we heard this one already? mans in space? oh no this is just another episode in space. fairchild... uuuh. cant remember. oh! this is related to that! this is one of the ppl from the other side. sounds like a Vast thing. oh he's the one that the dude saw? but that guy didnt have a face... she's sorta like jon. wanting to dismiss the statements. lmao i love the workplace gossip. ace jon for the win! oh cmon elias dont be a dick. sunny meadows or whatever. thats the place we heard about.

ep 107: oh great is it jude perry again. Third Degree. bahahsdkfj she was arrested. sorry but imagining this old british lady getting arrested is funny. she was trying to resurrect him. using the skin book. he's not feeling well. jon take a nap. i wonder if this is what happens when he uses his powers too much. He gets into The Zone when he reads statements lol. didn't we have a burning train car in anothre statement? is it julia fairchild? bahahahs "kidnapped. Again." poor jon honestly. julia... about her dad. daughter of the murder shed guy? hunting like your dad liked to hunt or normal people hunting. oh hunting vampires!

ep 108: melanie has been suffering. poor martin peter lukas why do you have to be like this. can he not just use the front door? does he have to bother the ppl doing statements?

ep 109: how come he cut her off? kinda rude tbh. its either jon's influence or there was smth he didnt want her saying. is it gerard on the table? this sounds kinda like smth from one of the university episodes. is it the closed eye on the hand? yup. he's like one of the students! if the thing listening in is elias then... he can do that without the tape recorder yknow. plus who's to say it wont just turn itself on again

110: who wants to bet its a leitner?

111: Lukas related to The Lonely. I used to not like Gerard that much but i like him more now. but i thought there were 15? ohhh thats right isnt flesh newer? gerry for the win honestly. finally telling jon things.

112: lol "again" no one ever tells any of these ppl anything. tim and basira are just out of the loop constantly. music, like the war episodes. The hunt or the slaughter? probably the hunt. so Daisy is related to the hunt right? basira likes the reading, she's doing fine at the institute. daisy's getting worried...

113: it just turned on randomly. what is it lol. explossives! oh boy. why do they always assume he turned it on intentionally. melanie youre not making me like you that much. which entity is this about i cant tell. lol he was disappointed it was just the end. The title Breathing Room made me think it was gonna be about the buried but i guess not. So many of these entities deal with death but the end is one that deals in just death. it has no need for fancy deaths, just death is enough

114: more hilltop road statements? the tree. oh boy. ok the tree has 8 arms obviously theres the spider parallels. was she taken into an alternate universe? oh no. jon tries to phrase things so he's not asking questions. thats honestly good. "sometimes i was kidnapped" oh dear. they got gertrude. daisy ur so odd lmao. who wants to bet they dont know the tape recorder's running?

115: silaca? or whatever? antique man? meat grinder... related to the meat is meat episode? oh wow. they buy antiques from him. maybe dont antagonize this creature which can kill you?

116: lol theyre all just so done with elias. music? is it like the one band that if you hear them you die or wtvr. oh its chess? i am very much confused. mmm stranger go brr. gorilla skin? oh shit the dance. woah. this is so good. this is so gender. the words are wonderful. "you can just say tim" lmao trying to fool elias never feels like a good idea.

117: except elias lmaoo. oh shit. leitner getting some use for once idk. bruuh poor melanie she has been thru so much shit. martin you can just say youre worried about jon. lol he's so accurate in his jon impression. lol who was that. was that daisy? lmaoo. oop hi tim. oh god i hope tim doesnt die. i feel like i wouldve heard about that? but im not sure. destroying the source of knowledge is gonna be hard for jon. yay jon! you did a good thing. let him rest.

118: go off martin lmao. awww poor martin. oh god the tape gets that squealy quality and its awful.

119: woah. lots of things happening. uhh. POP OFF TIM!!

120: lmao elias giving a statement about jon's dreams lol. damn jon doesnt even get his own dreams? has to stay Watching even when he's asleep? f in the chat this man goes thru so much shit. oh boy its peter. lol martin my beloved. idk i dont trust peter.

[saturnwritings]

freeze your brain

—after a disheartening start to the evening leads you to hide under a table at a party, a chance encounter with kenma leads you to have one of the best nights of your life. | based on a pov by a cosplayer on tiktok (@/sea.kaninchen)

pairing(s): kenma x reader, past/brief daishou x reader 

word count: 3993

warnings: cheating, hints to sexual themes (only briefly)

a/n: i think i should mention that I DONT HATE DAISHOU!!! i think hes a complex and interesting character and ppl shit on him a lot but i did need a villain for this so im sorry for being basic he doesnt deserve this 😪also i was honestly really excited to do this?? like tiktok cosplayers’ povs are not bad i love cosplayers its just straight tiktok’s povs im sorry 😔 

9:32pm.

You let out a sigh as you glance at your phone for what seemed like the thousandth time that night, the numbers moving slow, in almost a mocking way. The blinding, multi-colored lights dancing around the room kind of made your eyes spin, and the air around you made you wonder if it was possible to describe air as ‘sticky’ and what… questionable ways it could get to that state. There were bodies moving all around the room, most likely all around the house, doing a multitude of things: dancing, talking, loitering.

You had been coerced by your friends, as well as your boyfriend, Daishou, to come to this party, with promises of letting loose and free food. As reluctant as you were, your boyfriend had assured you that he would personally make sure you had a good time; said boyfriend was nowhere to be seen.

As you leaned against the wall, you raised your phone screen to your face as you mindlessly scrolled through various social media feeds and such, trying to pass the time. Ultimately, there’s only so much you can do constantly refreshing pages. On top of that, it might have just been your imagination but people seemed to stop and sneak looks at you, probably wondering why you were staying by yourself in a corner for so long.

Putting your phone away, you decided to approach some of Daishou’s friends - after all, the least he could do was to hang out with you at the party he kind of forced you to go to. Taking a quick look around the room, your eyes landed on a group of boys hanging out on the couches, you recognized them as your boyfriend’s friends. You greeted them as best as you could over the loud music, almost pounding your eardrums.

“I was just wondering, have you seen Daishou anywhere?” As soon as you mentioned his name, that atmosphere within the group grew tense. They all seemed to avoid eye-contact and some even started fidgeting. Suddenly, one of the boys spoke up.

“I- uhm, I think I saw him go upstairs?” He was met with pointed looks from the rest. Confused, you thanked them nonetheless and located the stairs.

Maneuvering your way through the many bodies on the stairs, you start searching through the many rooms of the house as you think to yourself: Who’s house is this? Why are there so many rooms? You must’ve looked through the first 4 rooms of the hallway (bathroom, storage closet, bedroom, bedroom) before reaching another door.

When you opened the door, thankful it wasn’t locked, you immediately saw two figures in a bed in the middle of the room. Upon closer inspection, you saw that they were very much not having a nap together but instead moving in tandem. You were about to exit before they could see you when one of the figures, a girl, locked eyes with you. She immediately fumbled and pushed the other figure, a boy, off of her and drew the sheets to cover herself. Feeling awkward and frozen in place, you started to spew out apologies. 

“Oh my goodness, I’m so sorry, I, uhm,” you hands out in a defensive motion “I didn’t mean to walk in! I was just…” You trailed off when the boy turned around and you got a good look of his face. It was then when you had realized it was your boyfriend in a bed with his ex-girlfriend, Mika. 

“Suguru…” Your face morphed into a disheartened expression, “You’re…” you couldn’t finish your sentence though, your eyes frantically shifting between Daishou and Mika, who you had just realized the identity of, in confusion as you opened your mouth to say something, but the words lay stuck in your throat. Fat tears welled up in your eyes, eventually falling down your cheeks, but you had yet to move. 

“y/n! It’s not what you think!” Your boyfriend started as he moved off of the bed and towards you, fumbling for an explanation, but his lack of clothes told you everything. No matter what excuse he came up with, the intentions were clear. 

You choked up and you pushed him away. “Save it! We’re through!” Your voice wavered as you turned and ran out the door, covering your mouth with your hands in an attempt to stifle your crying. Unfortunately, you moved to hide in the bathroom to gather your thoughts, gripping the door handle and pushing when you realized it was locked. 

You looked around for something, you weren’t really quite sure what, but you knew you needed to be away from your boyfriend (ex-boyfriend, you reminded yourself) no matter what. In the heat of the moment, you stumbled your way downstairs and into the dining room. It was completely empty, which came as a surprise, but you realized it was probably because the living room was big enough for everyone to do what they wanted and the food was spread out in the kitchen and living room. 

You managed to take a second to catch a break. You were about to take your phone out to call an Uber when you heard Daishou calling your name. In a moment of panic, your eyes landed on the dining table in the middle of the room. Swiftly, and with less gravitas than you’d like to admit, you crawled under the table, thanking the lords above that it was covered in a table cloth that reached the floor. An interesting style choice? Sure, but you were thankful nonetheless.

Holding your breath, you heard your name being called before you heard footsteps leave the room. So there you were, crying under a table at a party. You could still hear the loud techno and pop music from the other room, albeit muffled, and let it drown out your sorrows. 

You thought of calling an Uber now, but you figured it would be smart to take the time to let your thoughts regroup so you at least stopped crying hysterically. 

***

“Please, Kenma?!” Kuroo pouted as he clasped his hands together, “C’mon, it’s not gonna be that bad, it’ll be really fun!” Kenma sighed. He looked down at his paused game of MonHun and took note of the time.

3:51pm.

It was nearing 4pm and Kenma still had yet to clear this level. “I already told you, I don’t wanna go,” Kenma started, “I don’t like parties.” That had Kuroo bouncing and flailing around.

“But Terushima always throws the best parties, they’re fun for everyone!” Kenma grunted in response, he had started playing his game again, Kuroo narrowed his eyes and pouted even harder. “Pleeease?! Everyone’s gonna be there, it’s gonna be great! But it won’t be fun without you,” Kuroo pleaded. Kenma scoffed at that, he considered agreeing just so shut Kuroo up, but he wanted to know what he was getting into first.

“Who’s gonna be there?” Kenma asked, not looking up from his PSP.

“Everyone!” Kenma thought it was almost comical how Kuroo immediately perked up. Kenma shot him an incredulous look. “Uhm, okay, so I know Bo’s gonna be there, which means Akaashi’s gonna be there… You can hang out with him!” Kenma hummed, only partially listening, “No, you’re right, you’re right! What was I thinking? Obviously Akaashi’s gonna hang out with Bokuto, which means I’m gonna have to third wheel!” He tuned Kuroo out as he went on.

Just as Kenma had lost another round, Kuroo seemed to have finished his rant about being a third-wheel and the dynamics between Bokuto and Akaashi.

“Um, well, I mean pretty much all of the Volleyball teams are gonna be there, Terushima really wants this to be epic! Uhm, other than that… Oh! Isn’t there that girl? I forgot her name but she’s dating… Daishou…” Kuroo shudders, Kenma hummed in response. “She’s in your class isn’t she? What’s her name, you can hang out with her!” 

“y/n.” Kenma offered, still not looking up from his game. 

“Yeah, that’s it! Ugh, she’s kinda strange… like, Daishou? Really? Last time I saw him, he was wearing that ugly sweater…” Kenma tuned him out once again. 

While Kenma continued his game, he subconsciously pondered on your relationship. You guys had never really been close, save for the occasional group and partner projects you guys did together, as was expected, you were in the same class after all. If Kenma was being honest, the only time he paid you any mind was when Kuroo brought up how Daishou was most definitely blackmailing you into dating him or something or the sort.

Fed up with Kuroo’s whining, Kenma spoke up after another round lost. “Kuro, I’ll go to the party,” Kuroo’s eyes widened as he gasped, sporting a surprised smile, Kenma continued, “But if I get bored or stressed, I’m leaving.” 

Kuroo nodded.

***

Needless to say, Kenma wasn’t having a good time. While he did enjoy seeing his friend, Hinata, again, the loud and, quite frankly, annoying music was starting to hurt his ears and the food provided was decent at best, meaning fast food pizza and about a million different bags of chips.

“Kenma! C’mon, get over here! We’re playing beer pong, I need a partner!” Kenma sighed as he heard Kuroo call out to him. From where he was leaning against a wall, he could see Kuroo, Bokuto and Miya Atsumu setting up red solo cups on a table. 

This had been happening all night, Kenma minding his own business, occasionally engaging in conversation with Hinata or Akaashi if they crossed paths, with Kuroo swooping in to try to get him to play some sort of party game with him. The first was Just Dance, which Kenma avoided by saying he was hungry, next came truth or dare, Kenma used the bathroom excuse on that one, and so on and so forth. The cycle continued, Kuroo hunting down Kenma and Kenma finding any way he could escape. 

That led Kenma to this moment: leaning against a wall in the kitchen playing on his PSP, with Kuroo struggling to maneuver around everyone to get to him. Kenma checks the digital clock on his PSP. 

9:46pm.

That seemed like a good time to leave, Kenma thought. As he was pocketing his PSP to get ready to make a dash for it, Kenma panicked for a moment, realizing that to get to the front door, he would have to pass by Kuroo and the beer pong table. Contemplating for a moment, he concluded that he would much rather wait it out and leave a bit later than have to explain why he was leaving. 

When Kenma came to his senses, he realized Kuroo was even closer to him than he thought. Scanning for options, he ran the only direction he could, through the arch connecting the kitchen with the dining room. 

In a moment of desperation, he ducked under the table cloth.

***

You checked yourself again in your phone camera. Thankfully, you had calmed down and stopped crying hysterically, and were only left with the occasional sniffle. Unfortunately, the redness was still very much present, as were the tears when you thought too hard about Daishou. Despite all the nasty things other people, especially in your school, would say about him, he was a kind person, passionate about many things and was very caring towards you: always cheering you up and lending an ear when you needed to vent. 

I guess he just… really liked Mika, then, huh, you thought to yourself as you hugged your knees close to your chest.

Deep in your thoughts, you hadn’t noticed the frantic footsteps making their way towards you. You only realized something was off when the table cloth rustled and was lifted open, only for someone to slip in and under the table with you.

The boy seemed to be catching his breath when you made a startled noise of surprise. Hearing it, the boy snapped his head up to meet your stare. You were both just staring at each other with wide eyes, after a moment you both started fumbling out uhms and i’s, glancing around to avoid eye contact. 

After accidentally looking up at each other at the same time, you realized who the boy was.

“Wait… Kenma?” He blinked.

“y/n?” He responded with a tilt of his head, “Uhm, I’m sorry, I was just… trying to get away from someone…” You shifted in your spot, casting your eyes away in embarrassment hoping he wouldn’t see your red face and stray tears. “What about you?”

“Hm?” Your eyes widened in confusion.

“Why are you, uh,” he paused awkwardly and gestured around vaguely, “What’re you doing under a table?” You didn’t really know how to respond to that.

“Uhm… well,” you felt tears welling up in your eyes again, “I-” a sob wracked through your body. Completely overwhelmed with emotions, you burst into tears. Kenma’s eyes shifted frantically before he regained his composure, he had never really been good and expressing emotions or helping others with theirs.

Kenma thought to himself: What would Kuro do in this situation? Sure, Kenma had gotten upset lots of times, and Kuroo always knew how to help. He realized that one thing that Kuroo did was ask him if he wanted to talk about what was going on - of course, Kenma never did, but for some strange, unknown reason, it made him feel just the tiniest bit better. In the back of his mind, Kenma thought that it made him feel better because it told him there was someone who cared about him.

“Do you, uh, wanna talk about it? Maybe?” He winced at his awkward delivery, his hands fidgeting.

“Is that,” you sniffled, “is that okay?” Kenma tried his best to give a reassuring smile, he was sure it came off as strained.

“Yeah, sure.”

You told Kenma about your relationship with Daishou; how it started, all the ups and downs, and finally how it ended. How you kept having chance encounters: at school when you were out shopping and even late one night at a public library - that was the night he asked you out for the first time, and you couldn’t have been more smitten. 

During your relationship, he was so kind and considerate to you, and he never failed to make you laugh. You told Kenma how he even said that despite going to different schools, there was no one else he'd rather be that: that apparently didn’t stop him from hooking up with another girl.

After you went silent, Kenma found that you were finished. Despite only thinking of you as ‘that other girl in his class that was dating a volleyball player Kuroo hated’ until recently, seeing you cry and pour your heart out gave him a strange, internal attachment to you.

“Do you wanna get out of here?” Kenma asked suddenly, turning to you and planting a hand on the floor, learning towards you ever so slightly. You blinked.

“What?” Surprised by his own outburst, Kenma decided to roll with it.

“There’s an arcade a few blocks down… sometimes when I get upset, I go there and it always cheers me up?” To be perfectly honest, Kenma wasn’t really expecting you to say yes. He expected you to brush him off, say you were feeling better and ready to go home. 

Kenma himself didn’t know why he asked, he usually didn’t really like spended excess time with people he didn’t know that well, but subconsciously, there was a part of him that wanted to help.

“Oh, uhm, yeah! Sure, why not?” You metally cursed yourself for your stuttering, it was bad enough you were info-dumping and completely oversharing, you didn’t want Kenma to think you were that weak. You sniffled again, realization dawning on you.

“We gotta find a way out of here first, thought.” You said. Kenma cringed. 

***

Long story short, you and Kenma managed to escape the table without anyone seeing you. You were extremely thankful, as it would have been very awkward if someone saw the two of you crawling out from under a table. 

Getting outside was another thing, thought. Kuroo and the beer pong table were still very much blocking the way out, and there was always the risk of bumping into Daishou again. After a bit of asking around, you found out that there was a backdoor in the kitchen, so you and Kenma were able to make your escape. 

Now you were playing away to your hearts’ content to some random racing game at an arcade. You both were playing side-by-side, versing each other. To no one’s surprise, Kenma was beating you. Deep down, though, Kenma was a little impressed you were able to keep up with him so well, being a religious player of Mario Kart himself and all. 

You both fleeted from game to game, playing almost every game available from shooting games to claw machines to even a Space Invaders-esque game. You had managed to earn a good amount of tickets, all thanks to Kenma’s membership card and the loose tokens he found in his wallet.

Eventually, you had played until the arcade was empty and one of the employees came up to you to tell you they were closed. They did mention that you could still buy some prizes if you wanted to, to which Kenma turned to you.

“Do you want to?” 

Over the time you had spent playing games together, you had gotten to know Kenma better than just ‘the quiet boy in your class’ in between passing conversations and empty, teasing threats, some of your favorites had been: I will steal your kneecaps and If you play with that character you don’t deserve rights.

“Yeah, sure!” You replied, a genuine smile crossed your face. 

In the end, you had gotten a keychain with a mini funko character on it and Kenma settled on a cute sticker that, with much encouragement from you, he stuck on the case of his PSP.

After exiting the arcade, Kenma took a moment to glance over at you. The empty street illuminated by semi-faulty lampposts, and he found it showed your face more clearly than all the neon lights of the arcade. Your tears dried up, although there were still hints of red in splotches on your face. 

As he watched you talk excitedly about your new keychain, he couldn’t help but feel a strange way, an unfamiliar feeling he had never felt before. It was warm in a way, something akin to stepping home for the first time after being away for so long. It was weird, in all the years he had known you, or been partnered up with you for whatever, he had never thought of you as anything other than a random classmate. However, after everything you had both gone through together that night, something new was forming.

Little did Kenma know, you were thinking the same. You noticed the little things about him; you thought back to how his nose would scrunch when he would mess up in a game or you would surpass him in something, or how his eyes lit up and almost sparkled ever so slightly when he was picking out stickers. Now that you were outside, you could see how his dyed hair swayed gently in the crisp November wind, or how his eyes would somewhat crinkle as he laughed when you made a joke.

After a few moments of silence, you spoke up. 

“Hey, so, I didn’t really get to eat at the party… Do you maybe wanna get something to eat nearby?” You asked, turning your head to Kenma. Realizing how that sounded like you were asking him on a date, you quickly stuttered out “Of course, you don’t have to! We can just get a small snack or, or maybe we don’t have to get anything!” You laughed awkwardly as Kenma showed no obvious emotions, however his eyes were slightly widened and his cheeks growing more red, but you chalked that up to the colder weather and surprise. 

Kenma suddenly remembered how he didn’t get a chance to eat as well, but in all the games you guys were playing, he didn’t get a chance to feel hungry. Realizing he had not responded, he quickly thought of a place to get food, his mind immediately wandering to 7/11.

“Oh yeah, sure. There’s a 7/11 down the street, if you want?” He said, and you were off.

***

Sitting in the 7/11 with Kenma under the fluorescent lights was oddly comforting. You were happily eating your warm soba noodles (topped with tempura) as Kenma ate his apple pastry (having already eaten half of an egg salad sandwich and wrapping the rest for later) as you engaged in mindless conversation, Kenma periodically pulling out his PSP to either play or check on things. 

During some random conversation about a new game Kenma was playing, you noticed him occasionally glancing behind you. Eventually, you looked behind you to see what looked like a newly installed slushie machine, touchscreen and all. Realizing Kenma wouldn’t speak up about it, you decided to take charge.

“Do you wanna get slushies?” You said with a grin. Kenma looked surprised for a second before lightly laughing.

“Sure.”

Over the machine, you tapped the screen to get a strawberry lemonade slushie, while Kenma opted for cherry one.

Slushies didn’t exactly pair well with warm soba, but tonight was apparently a night full of surprise, what with finding out about your boyfriend (ex, you reminded yourself), not to mention these spontaneous adventures with a random boy who was, you thought, not so random anymore.

“Wanna have a competition?” Kenma’s voice interrupted your train of thought, “Let’s see who can drink theirs the fastest.” You grinned.

“You’re on!”

After Kenma counted down, you both tried to down your slushie. Halfway through, though, you had to stop.

“Ah! Brainfreeze!” You exclaimed, clutching your head with one hand. Kenma also stopped drinking and laughed, “My head feels so numb, argh!” You hummed. “At least now I won’t think of Daishou anymore… My brain feels like it’s pounding like, like it’s having a rave or something!” It was getting late, meaning you were dangerously close to your stage of drowsiness that caused you to infodump like crazy. Kenma’s smile dropped every so slightly. 

“Hey, uhm,” he looked as though he was looking for the right words to say, “I’m really sorry about what happened, uh,” he scratched the back of his head nervously, “Sorry, I’m not great at… feelings… but, if you ever need someone to talk to, I’m here.” 

You blinked for a second before smiling. 

“Thanks, Kenma.”

As you were finishing up the rest of your slushie, you turned to Kenma.

“Hey, uhm, I know this is pretty random but do you want to be my partner for the project we’re doing in science?” Kenma looked up from his PSP and stared at you, as if trying to remember what you were talking about, “The one about incomplete dominance and sex-linked traits? The teacher said you had to find a partner of the opposite gender so you could create a ‘hypothetical baby’, which, honestly, I find kinda dumb… Like, if the baby’s just hypothetical, then you could partner up with anyone, right? It’s not just me that feels that way?” 

Kenma remembered what project you were talking about, but he really enjoyed when you would continue on these rants. Being one to not talk that much, he liked how you were able to fill in the silence, although the times when you would be eating and he would be playing in silence were not as awkward as he thought, they weren’t awkward at all. 

“So… Do you want to pair up?” Kenma flushed, realizing he was mindlessly listening to you talk.

“Oh, uhm, yeah, sure.” You beamed.

bonus: you did your project on incomplete dominance and sex-linked traits and learned about the wonders of co-dominance in blood types. also kuroo was very worried about kenma leaving and thought he got kidnapped by a van that said ‘free games’ but it was all cool when he learnt kenma left with a girl ;)

[argumentl]

The Freedom of Expression Ep 3 - Michelin Star related suicide.

K: Hi, this is Dir en grey's Kaoru, getting started with the third episode of The Freedom of Expression.

J, T: Yep.

K: Joe Yokomizu san and Tasai san are here again. So, how are we doing, after the second time?

Kami:*interrupts*

J: Ah, He's cutting in early today.

Kami: Yes, yes, yes. Im thinking a lot about my timing.

J: You're entering from every possible angle?

Kami: Yes, thats it.

K: What do you think after the first two episodes? We are on our third today, but does it seem interesting?

K: As a god, im kinda out of things to say.

J: Really?

Kami: Yep

J: You would think a god would know about all sorts of things.

Kami: I don't know all that much. *K laughs* Im studying, Im working on it.

T: Last time, the suspicion arose that he was poverty stricken, didnt it?

J: Yes, he pointed out he was a poverty stricken god.

Kami: I told you not to say that! *K laughs*

T: Sorry..

Kami: Its a problem.

K: After we finished last time, we ended up talking a lot about money, didn't we?

J: Yes, we did. *everyone laughing*

Kami: Yep, yep.

J: After the recording, Kami spoke non stop about money, didn't he? He is really attached to it..for a god. You'd think he'd be the one least interested in that, but he turns out to be the one most interested.

Kami: It wasn't that bad until then. It wasn't like that back on the radio show. It really has become a problem recently.

J: Oh now?

T: I see.

Kami: Yes, now.

K: Right, well, our third episode...

J: Yes, the title is 'Suicide resulting from Michelin stars - In the lawsuit of a former 3 star Michelin star chef, the court rules that....'

This is concerning the Michelin guide which was even popularised in a TV drama last year. In its country of origin, France, there is so much pressure, the fear of losing a star can even lead to suicide. A Chef who lost his third star even filed a lawsuit against Michelin. As for the specific story, Marc Veyrat, who runs the famous restaurant 'La Maison des Bois' in the Alps, recieved the long awaited 3 star rating in 2018. Just one year later, this dropped to a 2 star rating. Veyrat responded angrily, 'The quality of my food hasn't changed at all. Its a mistake in the inspection', and brought the case against Michelin. As well as demading the inspector's qualifications and the report to be made public, as his demotion has led to him to  falling into a state of depression, he is suing Michelin for the sum of just 1 Euro, or in yen, 120 yen. He has been telling the media of his discontent that the inspectors could not recognize the cheese Reblochon, from the Savoy region, and probably mistook it for the widely produced cheddar cheese. Nanterre courthouse in the suburbs of Paris responded, that as well as the evaluation of the inspector coming down to freedom of expression, the plaintiff did not show good enough reason that  his reputation had been marred. The famous chef was defeated, but the agony of chefs over the star rating is becoming a problem in society. By the way, simply put, the standard for the inspection, or the standard for the stars, is the food only. Not the restaurant interior, or the service. The food is assessed on the following five criteria. 1) The quality of the ingrediants. 2) The level of skill and amount of seasoning. 3) Originality. 4) Cost performance. 5) The consistency of the presented dishes on the whole. This is the same all over the world. As for the meaning of the stars, this is as follows. One star = Food that is particularly delicious within its category. Two stars = Spectacular food that is worth making a detour to have it. Three stars = Excellent food that is worth specifically traveling just to have it. The report is produced by a group consisting of the inspectors, the chief editor and all other responsible parties for the Michelin guide book. Every year they recieved around 45,000 emails and letters from thier readers, which they look through, and sometimes even do re-evaluations. ....Food!

K: Food...

J: Yep...I mean, reputation really controls which restaurants we go to.  Kaoru, what do you think?

K: Hmm, well, its an inspection isnt it?

J: Yes, its an inspection.

K: I was in Paris last year. There are loads of these aren't there? * the others laugh*

J: Well, yes. So, he didn't change anything about his food, but his rating still dropped, whats that all about?

K: Isn't it precisely because he didn't do anything new?

J: Oh, could it be that? If others are upping thier game, you will naturally drop.

K: There couldn't really be someone who mistook it for mass produced cheddar cheese.

J: You'd think, wouldn't you?

K: And then, maybe people are just different, no matter what it is. Even if its the same person..

J: Maybe they were feeling bad or something..

K: Hmm, an inspection is...Well, if it was sports or combat sport or something..the observers can easily judge the game, like..oh this one definitely won...But with music, or movies....appraisals of 'things', its different depending on the person isnt it.

J: Yes, you're right.

K: This type of guide is for people who want to expand thier knowledge, the Michelin guide ...For movies it would be the Academy Awards, and there are tv shows doing the same thing.  Its just to make things easier for people...so, in the end, it seems like it can't be helped really.

J: Well, thats it, yes. I dont know about Michelin, but Im in the position to do album reviews, so im in the place to award stars...and, its true, if its a genre you like, you just naturally like it, and are prone to jacking up the stars, but if its a genre you don't listen to, you feel unfamiliar and it takes a while to figure out whether its good or bad. So certainly, as for awarding stars.. asking people, well, im just repeating what you said Kaoru, its not objective information. You have to try and think about the aim. If the orgainisation drops a star from you it doesn't necessarily mean you are bad..

K: Its like a contest or that type of thing, you can still see who's winning the game..

J: Like 1-1, you can see whos winning in front of you, the circumstances are a little different from this though.

K: Eventually, won't it affect thier sales though?

J: I think so.

T: Don't you think diners also rely too much on this kind of guide?

K: You can check anything on your smartphone, you don't really know whats true.

J: You don't, there are these restaurant review sites where some people are paid to write good reviews, and some people are paid to write bad reviews, you know, to destroy thier rivals they will write bad stuff...So its difficult to know how far to trust that type of thing. By the way, Kaoru, do you refer to reviews in relation to food, or new music or anything like that?

K: Well, I do, yes. Guides and such...Usually, I  get information I want to know from all over the place. I ask people, like..'I want to eat this', or 'I wonder if that place is good' or something,  I ask people what they think.

T: But when you want to go to see a movie, do you ask someone who likes movies?

K: I'll read what someone has written about it, or I'll read what they've posted on social media.

J: The main thing is listening to people you can trust.

K: Yes, thats it.

J: Someone you are familiar with, or some well-informed person. Also someone you see eye to eye with.

T: Thats right.

J: If you go out for food with someone, and they say 'this is delicious', if you ask them what else they like, it will be the same kind of things that you like.

K: Really, I've never been to a two star or three star Michelin restaurant * the others laugh*.

J: Well, this internet age isn't going to end...

T: Right

J: Just how far will people trust this kind of assesment, or star rating?

T: Joe, have you ever been hassled by anyone because of this? By artists or such?

J: I havn't actually...I write what I didn't personally like, and sign my name with a star rating, then, 'this is what I think, but what do YOU think', to continue the conversation.

K: Our boss in our office, he was in a band a long time ago, and he got angry about something that was written in a magazine, so he stormed over to the magazine headquarters * the others laugh*  He might ????*1

J,T: Your boss, wow!

J: What was the magazine?

K: Oh, I don't remember..*laughing*

J: Which of them has the freedon of expression? *laughing*

K: They are both clashing with each other.

J: The moment their freedom clashed *laughs*

T: But, Ive heard that kind of story before...A hip hop artist or something, went to a magazine and tried to restrain or kidnap the editor. He took it that seriously.

J: Well, in a music magazine, if you write an article, its the same with interviews, you dont know whether the other party will see or hear it. For me, after editing, I think its good to show it to the artist once. Im only writing my ideas, and there are times where thats not the reality.

For interviews, you dont necessarily hand over the questions in advance, and if im just asking at random, the artist may feel on the spot and not be able to say what they really feel, so i think its good to show them once, to get the facts right.  With reviews too, i think showing them what i intend to write is important. But there are magazines where the boss doesnt get the content checked, 'you said it, so take responsibility', kind of thing. Thats a bit harsh, i think.

T: Well, yes. With interviews, I think its good to show the person. Protecting freedom should be kept independent.

J: Yes, yes, you are free to write what you think, but this is also keeping it real by checking if artists are holding responsibility for what they say. They decide whether they can really say that after checking it first.

K: There are times when you wish you'd used more words..

J: There are! Of course, its limited to the time and place of the interview, for example 1 hour, the time is squeezed. You have to get on with it, with little explanation..sometimes you need to supplement that.

T: Yes, you're right.

K: What do you think, Kami?

J: Kamiii?

Kami: *stifled laugh* Yes, what?

J: I don't know how to address him.

Kami: No no, don't worry about that, we are short on time.

K: Yes, our third installment is ending.

J: It felt quick today..somehow.

K: Originally, one episode was supposed to have two news items.

J: Yeah, i thought that.

K: But it didn't work that way, did it?

J: No, it didnt. What do the viewers think? Is one item enough? Or do they want two items at a faster pace?

K: If its too long, they won't be able to watch it.

J,T: Right.

T: A shorter video is better.

J: As for raising the number of views, right?

K: We talk about quite difficult stuff too, we should try to break into it as much as we can, make it interesting. Oh, and Kami, even his voice is interesting.

J: Its enough.

K: Well, that was the third installment, please tune in next time.

K, J, T: Thank you very much.

*1 I couldn't catch this. 

[rejectedluke]

IMAGINE: Big John took you in years ago, and people from your past come to inform you of your loss and the Pogues try to get you to talk about it. Despite you not wanting to.

(PART 2)

FAMILY.

warnings: talks about death and grieving.

Hours later, you return. Exhausted. Before you can even make it to the porch you see John B. Attempting to make a break for it, you’re busted before you can even take the first step to get away. “Y/N.” John B yells, you give up dropping your board and making your way inside. “We’re concerned.” is all he says, following your footsteps.

“About?” you question, attempting to play dumb. “Acting stupid isnt a good look, Y/N.” John B grumbles. You turn, now facing him, “John B, I love you and you know that. Your family took me in when I had no one. For that I will be forever grateful, but I had a life before you. Before the Outer Banks, and there are some things I would like to keep in the past. So can we just please let it be?” You plead, as JJ, Kie and Pope emerge from your bedroom, “Bullshit. You always say getting it all out is healing. I don't know why you don't trust us.” JJ angrily spat in your direction. You stand there, frozen in your spot. It's as if your feet have grown roots. “There are just some things i’d rather not talk about, so please let it be.” you exclaim “Fuck no, I saw you break down, your whole body was shaking and I just had to stand there and watch three strangers comfort you. Three fucking stangers over us, your family.” JJ gets louder with each word. Family is the only word that resonates with you. “Those ‘three fucking stangers’” you attempt to mock JJ’s voice, “are my fucking family. They have been and will always be my family. They flew out to tell me my brother passed away, and I didnt you guys have to deal with the fallout. So I disappeared. That is what I know how to do, I was at my most vulnerable and I didnt want you to see me while my whole world was falling apart. So excuse me for needing time to grieve and wanting to keep certain things to myself, but I don't owe you shit. No explanation, no nothing.” As you speak each word, your tone grows louder. “You wanna be there for me?” you scream as you sob, “Being there for me doesnt involve forcing me to talk about things i’m not ready to fucking discuss.” you finish off your rant as Kie wraps her arms around you, “Baby, I-” JJ beings before cutting himself off unable to form words. Your sobs only grow louder, your body shaking harder and breathing becoming more difficult. After sobbing for what felt like ever in Kies arms, your breathing finally returns to normal and your body stops shaking. “I need a drink” you speak through tears. “Baby, no. You need to grieve and let it all out. Drinking won't do anything but numb you for a little.” JJ speaks softly, kneeling to your level. Obviously displeased with his answer, you rise to your feet. A little wobbly, “Numbness is what I need, J. I can't handle this.” you whisper as he pulls you into his embrace, “Just let me hold you, sweet girl.” JJ whispers into your hair. “No” you whisper, his grip only tightens. “No” you speak again louder. When he doesnt move to let you go, you begin to thrash in his grasp, repeating “No” over and over again. After exerting what felt like all the energy you had and still failing, you collapse into JJ’s arms. Sobbing all over again, he releases you. Wrapping one arm around your back and the other grabbing your legs, to carry you bridal style. Walking towards your room, he settles you both into bed. Holding you basically on top of him with a tight grip.

SORRY I COULDNT FIT IT ALL, so there’s a third part

[badfauxmance]

Hiii! First of all i want to say that I loveeee your blog, I found it 3 days ago and I’ve been reading all of your posts since... and God, was I naive about the celebrity world!!! I actually believed for a second that Ale’s and Seb’s relationship was real 🥺 Anyways, I’m still learning about how all this whole PR thing works, so I’m sorry if my question is stupid, but I was wondering why Sebastian agreed to this whole thing in the first place? I mean, he seems like such a private person1/2

2/2 that hates all these internet and media drama, so why would he gather in a relationship like this? Is it because he signed with CAA, and therefore he doesnt have a saying on this anymore and has to do as he’s told? Again, i’m sorry if I sound stupid I’m just trying to learn how these things work so I dont fall for fake shit anymore lol Sorry for such a long question!

Hi! Welcome to the blog! Okay I’m combining your two-parter Ask on here so I’ll delete the other one in the inbox just to simplify things.

Eh... it’s understandable. I mean not everyone realizes this was all fakery from the start, but hey at least now you figured it out. Most of us were just casual fans. We’d read the latest news and just move on with our lives not thinking much of it. But then... you notice something funky is going on and the next thing you know you fell down the rabbit hole like we did and you now see signs of fakery all over the place. You said it yourself, he’s not really the type who loves to get into drama and tons of attention on his relationships. This was one of the many red flags that made me and the co-writers suspect shenanigans are happening.

Actually ALL the way back in November/December I was doing a series of posts about this nonsense, but then we suddenly got an explosion of followers sending in Asks and well I never got back to it. I planned to do it, but I’m experiencing fatigue on this. But who knows maybe some of you guys might be into reading more of the Saga series I was working on. I still have posts in the Draft folder waiting for me to continue it. One of the parts was actually going to be a full explanation why Sebastian is doing this, but I’ll give you the short version here.

Basically we here at Badfauxmance (and other speculators we talk to) have puzzled this out. Our suspicion is that Sebastian did this because of a couple factors. CAA is, I think, his third agency he’s worked with. Doing this seems to us like a sign that he’s not satisfied with the roles or the projects he’s been getting with said agency. So this would point towards someone with real career ambitions.

He’s signed up with this top tier agency, which is probably his big chance at getting bigger projects down the road. He’s going to be inclined to play ball with whatever ideas they bring to him. His original agents very likely bring up the idea to be seen dating with someone. This is a classic Hollywood PR strategy. Nothing gets the public talking about you like being seen dating someone or speculated that you’re dating someone. This would get attention on him and therefore make people more aware he exists if they don’t already know him from Marvel. Let’s be realistic, Sebastian won’t be playing Bucky Barnes forever. They need to do more to get him some attention. Not to mention, CAA in particular has a reputation of their clients getting tons of gossip notice and pap walks every other week.

Sebastian isn’t a slave. He’s not being forced to do anything against his will. It’s quite possible that he didn’t handle isolation during the beginning of the pandemic well and he might have gotten desperate to DO something other than being stuck at home for hours at a time. This could have made him more easily persuaded to do this nonsense. Had he been stronger willed, he might have insisted that he should do this with someone who is a local so it’s less problematic looking traveling to other countries for pap walks. Problem is that once you sign the dotted line, you got to stick with the agreed upon rules. There’s usually penalties included if either party violates the rules in the contract. So to a certain degree, while the contract is in effect, there’s not much he can do.

We noticed back in December he did a bit of “rebellion” and he had to do stuff to make up for his digression of the narrative he had to push. It’s all ridiculous when you realize it’s fake.

Anyways, thanks for your interest! Welcome again!

[probably-writing-x]

Forever

Guzmán x Reader

Request by anon: Hi! I love your writing so much! Would you be able to write a Guzman angst sort of based on the song forever by chvrches from the third season where the reader and him got into a big fight over a topic that was super important to reader and then as they both mature they sort of start yearning for the other, regretting everything that happened and they have a big convo where the emotions come to the surface and it’s where the “i regret the night i told you i would hate you til forever” comes in.

Gif is not my own

Requests are open 🤍

Hating someone was an odd feeling, especially when you’d once loved them. It wasn’t the type of hate that you felt for something that everybody hated, or the hate you’d dismissively say you had for the rude customer at work, nothing like that. It was this odd, deepest feeling that you almost had to force yourself into sticking to. Like it was a social construct that you couldn’t defy. An expectation based on previous actions that couldn’t just ease over time. You constantly had to remind yourself of the reason why you’d hated them in the first place and supposedly that gave you reason to hate them now. But that couldn’t always be the case. And in the case of you and Guzmán, you don’t think you’d ever felt that feeling properly - you’d just tried to convince yourself that you did.

Now, it was over two years since you’d split up with Guzmán. Since then, a lot had happened. A LOT. You’d watched him fall into the hands of Lu, a little quicker than you’d have expected him to move on. You’d seen him grow into a completely different person, or so you’d assumed. See him lose his sister and his friendship group come crumbling along with it. And, eventually, start to reach more and more complications come up in his relationship with Lu.

That night, the one where it all ended, would always be one you’d never forget.

“Are you taking the piss Guzmán? I wanted you there for one fucking day! One day! Is that really so hard?” You shove at his chest even if it doesn’t knock him an inch.

“something came up, okay? I don’t know how many times it needs to be said!”

“Something came up? I was sat in court watching a jury decide my father’s future and you’re telling me something came up? You’re an asshole Guzmán. You’re a real fucking asshole.”

“What do you want me to say? I’ve apologised haven’t I?”

“A sorry doesnt cut it. It never will. You’re acting like this relationship is some sort of difficulty for you. It shouldn’t be. You should want to be there for me when I need you. I shouldn’t be calling you five minutes before we go in just so I can check one last time if you have any heart left in you and you’ll actually be there for me,” You shake your head, tears threatening their arrival as they brew behind your eyes, “What is it? Is all of this just too much for you? Am I too much for you?”

He remains silent.

“I’ll never forgive you for this Guzmán, the one time I needed you, really fucking needed you - and you couldn’t even do that,” You purse your lips as they tremble.

“Don’t say that (Y/n)... come on, I messed up.”

“Yeah, you’re right, you really did,” You scoff, clicking your tongue as you regain some confidence, “And when I was sat in that court today, watching my Dad be wrongly convicted of a crime he never committed, there was still nobody I hated more than you.”

“Babe, please... don’t say that...” Guzmán winces, reaching out for you with no avail.

“I’ll never forget that feeling Guzmán. Ever.”

For a while, you’d savoured that feeling of that night. Like it was the final piece of feeling that you had of your relationship with that boy. The boy you’d convinced yourself to love constantly and so deeply even at such a young age.

In the past two years, you’d been through your own version of pain - just as Guzmán had. You’d separated so far from each other that it felt like you’d be talking to a stranger if the two of you ever found yourself back together again. You’d spent months proving your fathers innocence until he’d finally been released and it hurt even more when you didn’t have someone to lean on during that whole process. Even in ending your relationship, Guzmán had never really released that hold he had on you - and he never would do. You’d still always think of him, care for him, love him.

It made you question whether you’d been to hasty in your actions that night. Had you jumped the gun on giving up on him so easily? How much would be different if you’d have held your tongue and let it slide as an honest mistake? No, it meant a lot to you that day and it still should do now. Your own questioning wouldn’t change that.

But damn, that boy had the power to make you question it.

- - - - - -

It had been two years since Guzmán had last properly spoken to you. Two years since he’d seen you laugh at something he’d said, or hit him jokingly when he made rude comments in public. Two years since he’d held your hand and placed kisses on your knuckles. Two years since he’d made the worst mistake of his life and let you slip away.

He’d replayed that night over and over, relentlessly questioning how he could ever be so stupid. He should’ve been there. He should’ve held your hand and kept you close beside him, let you cry into him when you watched the worst day of your life unfold. How could he have ever let you go through that alone? In the last two years, Guzmán had grown immensely. He’d become a different person. And in that growth, he’d learnt more and more of what he should’ve done when he had the chance. With that growth, came a deep-set regret that he could never shake.

It wasn’t as simple as just asking you to forgive him for what he’d done. Like he could just explain his side of things and make that into enough to prove that he deserved a second chance. It was two years too late for any of that, and he could never blame you for not seeing his side of things. Sure, he did have an explanation for that day - but you’d always think you were right. And he knew that what you were going through back then was enough to mean his explanation was never going to be enough. He should’ve been there, despite any possible excuse.

He’d tried back then and it hadn’t been successful. That’s when he’d expected that he’d never get a second chance.

“Come on (Y/n) open the door!” He knocks loudly against the wood once again, resting his forehead against the surface, “Please.”

You had already mentally scolded your Mum for opening the front door to him, but you were relieved that you had a lock on your bedroom door and at least could keep one physical barrier between you. Lord knows you didn’t have the strength to keep up any of your own barriers between him and you.

“It’s been a week babe, are you seriously not going to say a word to me anymore?” He used the nickname so flippantly, so naturally.

“We both made it clear where we stand,” You reply coldly, wrapping your arms around yourself even if he couldn’t see your vulnerability.

“That doesn’t mean we can’t fix this,” He hits his hand on the door again but it’s not aggressive, it’s losing hope.

“Yes it does Guzmán,” You state, taking in a shaky breath as you walk closer to the door until you’re leaning your forehead against it. You wanted to be close to him, despite the door being shut between you.

“No, no. Answer me one question and that will prove it,” He reminds you, “Did you mean what you said?”

You close your eyes as a tear slips between them, dropping to the carpet under your feet.

“Come on (Y/n). Did you mean it when you said you hated me?”

He’s pleading with you and himself for the answer to be no. With every fibre of his body he is hoping that you could never possibly have that feeling for him. Please.

Your lack of response is answer enough. Enough of an answer to shatter his heart into a thousand pieces as he turns against the door and slumps against it, slowly sliding down until he’s on the ground.

You can’t hear him sob but you can feel it in you as you do the same.

Both of you realising more and more that this wasn’t a fixable argument.

- - - - - -

“Shit, I’m sorry,” You mumble to yourself as you stumble into another person in the corridor, bending down to help them pick up what you’d just caused them to drop.

You were already late for the interview you’d been waiting for and this clearly wasn’t a good start. You’d got yourself lost in the building and were starting to think that, at this point, you’d shown up at the wrong place.

“Excuse me, do you know where-“ You start to ask somebody walking past you before you realise they’re on the phone and most certainly don’t want to be talking to you.

You sigh and turn to be met with a sight that, really, is the most unexpected thing to see in this moment.

Only metres from you, with the hints of a warm smile on his lips, stands Guzmán. The boy you’d managed to not say two words to in two years, and now found yourself face to face with.

“Seems you haven’t changed,” He comments, words he didn’t expect to be the first that he said to you.

“You’d be surprised,” You scoff, surprising yourself with those being your first words, “Are you here for the job interview?”

“Something like that,” He smirks, “And I’m guessing you are too.”

“Yeah,” You look down at your feet and swallow the lump in your throat.

Eventually, the silence becomes so deafening and you decide instead to take a seat on the chairs around the waiting area.

“I didn’t expect to see you at a place like this,” Guzmán comments, taking the seat two away from you, “This doesn’t really seem like your scene.”

“And being more than two feet away from Lu doesn’t seem like your scene either - but here we are.”

It’s a harsh response. But you didn’t want the small talk.

He looks down and smirks a little, “Touché.”

There’s a low volume of music playing through the corporate office block and you realise more and more that he’s right in saying this isn’t the place for you. Not one person seemed capable of smiling, and they all seemed to scold each other like they’d grown into hating every piece of existence within these walls. Maybe you didn’t want this interview. The music, however, seemed like your one slice of hope for distraction with Guzmán sat only a metre away.

That is until it turns to one specific song. One from a night you’d probably rather forget. The time you’d first got properly drunk and realised that drunk (Y/n) seemed to have a hatred for clothes and a strong liking for pools. Yeah, that was an interesting night.

Guzmán can’t help but smile down at his feet as the memory floods back to him too. The night he’d had to throw you over his shoulder and carry you out of a house party before you broke another vase and it would become impossible for him to cover it up again.

“Stop smiling,” You state quickly, “I don’t need to relive that night again.”

He laughs and you find it impossible to not chuckle a little too, that night had always been a joke between the two of you.

You don’t look at each other but it’s the most you’ve shared in a long time - laughing together at a common memory.

More and more people filter in for their interviews and you become increasingly certain that you didn’t even want the job, let alone the interview beforehand.

“Do you want to get out of here?” Guzmán asks from beside you, leaning over the chair that separated you so that he can ask quietly.

You eye him for a moment and question every instinct you have before you eventually settle on saying, “Definitely.”

You soon find yourself walking through the corridors in an attempt to find your way out, eventually getting through to some sort of grounds area where you’re surrounded by overly fake plants and turf instead of real grass. The lyrics from that song keep playing over and over in your head, resurfacing a wealth of memories with them.

“I know you won’t believe me,” Guzmán starts, “But I’ve been thinking about you a lot lately.”

“Oh no, of course I believe you!” You laugh, “Things with Lu aren’t looking good, and you’re not the type of person to want to be alone.”

“It’s not like that,” He rolls his eyes, “But it’s good to know you stuck to your promise of hating me.”

You glance at him momentarily, it was like you hadn’t ever intended to speak those words. They were all just part of this facade you created to convince yourself that you did still, in fact, hate him. Just playing the game, right?

“A lot’s happened recently, (Y/n). With Marina, everything at school, my father, everything - I’ve realised more and more how shitty it is to go through a bad time,” He explains, “I guess I never really understood why you needed me so much on that day in court - you could handle it yourself, and I wouldn’t have changed the outcome.”

“Guzmán don’t use this as a reason to list why I shouldn’t have been pissed at you-“

“No, no,” He stops in front of you so he’s facing you directly, “What I’m trying to say is that I never really asked why you needed me so much - but I get it now. Because in everything that’s happened, I realised that the one person I needed... was you. And not to make the situation better or to solve the problems or anything, but just for you to be there.”

You look down at your feet and take in a deep breath, “I don’t know what you want me to say Guzmán. That was two years ago.”

“Right. Two years where I’ve realised more and more that I had an answer to that question. One that I should’ve answered when you first asked,” Guzmán explains, “You asked me if this was too much for me, if you were too much for me. Instinctively, I would say no. Why wouldn’t the answer be no?”

You look back up to him because it seems like these are words that he’s been waiting to speak for forever.

“But of course it’s yes. You’re not too much in what you ask for, what you expect. You’re too much in how good you are for me. You’re too kind, patient, supportive- and I didn’t realise the extent of that until I didn’t have it.”

His hands reach for yours and he holds onto them with so much hope that you start to believe it too for just a moment. In those eyes, in that soft grip, you’re starting to see the blurring of your past and the rewriting of your future. You snap out of it too quickly than your heart would’ve liked you to.

“Guzmán,” You push away from him, stepping past to get him out of sight, “What do I say to that?”

“What do you mean?” He sighs, “We’ve had two years to realise how much has changed and how we’ll never find anyone as perfect for each other as we are. Isn’t that enough?”

You turn around and take in his full appearance. Looking at every piece of him that had grown and matured so much in the past twenty four months. Those broken pieces that life had caused and the parts of him that had just about started to heal. And the heaviest wash of regret sits atop your shoulders, heavy enough to knock you down. You’d told this boy that you hated him. That you always would. And that was a regret you’d held ever since.

“I just need you to ask yourself if you think we can recover from what happened that night. But I’m going to ask you one thing I asked you a week after, now two years after - did you mean it when you said you hated me? That you’d always hate me?”

You let out a shaky breath, “I’ll always regret the night I told you I’d hate you forever.”

In those words, it’s like Guzmán is tearing down every piece of every barrier that had built up between you two. He strides toward you and his instant instinct would be to kiss those lips that he’d been waiting to kiss for years. But this connection was deeper than that. And when his arms wrap tightly around you and he engulfs you in that same scent from way back when, he expresses much more than a kiss ever could.

“Seems you haven’t changed,” He mumbles into your shoulder, referencing his words from earlier as he smirks against your skin.

You pull back and cup one side of his jaw in your hand, “You’d be surprised.”

He chuckles and dips his head to finally press that kiss to you, strong and certain.

Yeah, surprised was one word for whatever he was feeling. And he’d savour that mix of emotions for as long as he could, letting it erase away all of the pain.