#like since may o_o my bad

[drama-glob]

SPOILERS FOR "APOLOGY TOUR!!!"

Oh this episode hurt, especially the ending. ;_; ;_; ;_;

I figured Stolas and Blitz wouldn't be back to normal or even amicable and that Blitz would need to learn about how his past actions when it comes to relationships have hurt people, but it's just so sad to watch the consequences some to fruition. ;_; Stolas holding onto his anger and hurt from what Blitz yelled at him as well as likely still blaming himself for the arrangement is justifiable since it's barely been any time since "The Full Moon," but him still not taking Blitz point of view on the matter and realizing where he messed up too didn't aid in their progress towards coming back together; Blitz playing up that he wants to just keep things sexual between him and Stolas while mocking relationships and refusing to admit that he did any wrongdoing only exacerbated the matter. :/ I didn't expect the Striker secret to come out and I don't blame Stolas for being upset about that. :/ It's too bad Blitz ruined his apology with a f*ck you and taking his lack of apologizing as a challenge rather than an actual call to change, but I did love the little mentioning of Fizz. ;)

The apology tour Blitz did was hilarious and I love that he actually was thinking about texting Stolas an apology, but of course, he didn't since it's the one he genuinely feels bad about; the surprise cameo of Martha and Mrs. Mayberry was probably the most shocking and hilarious! XD At the party, it was crazy that Blitz had been with and hurt that many people (and that's just the ones that attended O_O), and while I'm glad Stolas got out of the palace and seemed to be enjoy Verosika's company for the most part, seeing him continually drink was heartbreaking, especially because we know he's done it before. ;_;

"All 2 U" was an amazing song with Stolas just laying out all his feelings and pain with him even seeing how his past actions were wrong/contributed to Blitz not reciprocating his feelings. It was also practically unbelievable to see just how much Blitz actually took Stolas's words to heart and legit felt terrible. I love that Blitz showed concern too for Stolas being drunk (likely thinking about Verosika getting to that point and seeing the parallels) as well as him admitting his insecurity about no one being capable of loving him; Stolas then drunkenly pointing out that them throwing a party about how much they hate him every year showed they did care enough about him at one time was funny and true. XD I definitely teared up at Stolas's confession of just being wanting to be wanted and that he didn't even need the grand show he laid out to Blitz initially; the fact that Blitz did attempt to offer comfort to Stolas before he snapped back up made me go awww so hard. ;_; ;_; ;_;

Even though Verosika had such vitriol for most of the night, the fact that she uses the parties to bring those Blitz hurt some comfort that they aren't alone and can even find someone new from those he rejected is in a way comforting; it's sad though that she got dumped for just saying she loved Blitz. ;_; I'm glad Blitz admitted he has been terrible to people and that he wants to change, which definitely made it surprising that the line from the trailer was said to Verosika and not Stolas, but the impact was still great. :)

My heart broke at that incubus asking Stolas to dance because it gave me a bad feeling and sure enough, him and Stolas kissing hurt so much even though I know Blitz and Stolas aren't together anymore right now and this is part of the consequences for Blitz's actions. Him not ruining Stolas's fun hurt as well as at the same time showed he wasn't being selfish, so progress and pain. ;_; ;_; ;_; Hopefully it'll just be a one-night stand, but who knows since Stolas does seem to still want Blitz, but having a break may help both of them work on themselves. ;_; ;_; ;_; Well, if the shorts don't add anymore to the main story, here's me looking forward to "Ghostf*ckers" in October to find out how these two will handling things/change hopefully for the better next time. <3

[stxrrynxghts]

Re-watching Mahabharat (5/?)

Karna's obsession with Arjun is VERY unsettling

Bhishma is straight up BLACKMAILING Dhritrashtra. I don't have any issues with it, NGL.

Duryodhan's expressions are so FUNNY like he looks stupid 90% of the time despite being gorgeous

"Bhairava ne bhairavi gaa li, mere bacche" LMFAO

Dhritrashtra loves Pandu and his sons, but not more than his own kids.

Drona is gatecrashing this event. YAY.

Technically Drona is right. The Kurus are still his students.

Arjun crying in court T_T

see guys? This is WHY Arjun is the model student. HE is the one student who is so devoted to his guru, hence why he is Drona's fav as well.

Drona knew that Arjun would stop him, didn't he?

Drupad is SO creepy, ngl

Okay but why does Karna dislike Arjun and the Pandavas so much? He has known them for like...a day?

Karna be like: I am offended on your behalf, mitra

The mitrata between Karna and Duryodhan.....makes me think that they were room mates ;)

Not Arjun making a fool out of Subhadra

also their tune is so soft to listen to.

No Arjun, jumping isn't called "dancing".

Did I just see Arjun and Subhadra play the Dwapar version of hopscotch-

Srsly? Subhadra doesn't know what the chakravyuha looks like?!

Not Subhadra dropping dialogues said by Krishna to confuse Arjun

Arjun is not impressed by Krishna

Arjun is a huge simpleton. Dude can't even see that he is being flirted with.

did.....did he just flirt back? Is the world ENDING?!

Drona is not allowing Karna to fight in this thing. He isn't wrong, since as per the show, Karna is NOT Drona's student!

Also why is Karna being so salty about this, as if he didn't expect this

Okay, in canon, Shikhandi was born as a girl, but later in life, she transformed into a man, completely. He even married a woman, and had kids. why is he a girl here

why do the Pandavas always let Duryodhan boss over them

The Kauravas think they can break into the chakravyuha. How hilarious.

this. this is the result of overconfidence.

"Is vyuh rachna ko todna to mai bhi nahi jaanta" You should have thought this before entering, Duryodhan.

Le Duryodhan: pran jaaye, but hair flip na jaaye

Shikhandi is so incompetent for someone who aspires to defeat Bhishma.

TIME FOR ARJUN TO KICK SOME ASS

Seeing the chakravyuha transports me to more traumatic times

Yudhishthira, Bhima, Arjun, Sahadeva: i fight with my weapon, Le Nakul: i talk in horse language

not Bhima thinking about in the midst of a fight o_O

The Pandavas are taking this VERY lightly

I mean, so would i, if Arjun and Bhima were my brothers

Yudhishthira has the "tumhara kuch nahi ho sakta" expression on his face

Sahadeva's wig is so BAD

Arjun is serving hair goals even in the midst of a war. Maybe it has something to do with the fact that his hair is all natural, and not a wig.

Arjun, this isn't hurdles. why are you jumping?

Arjun, sweetie, be careful, or else your dhoti might get untied somehow.

Drona and Drupad's history....is interesting.

Drupad is a sexist person, and an even shittier dad.

Dhritarashtra tried to manipulate Yudhishthira, but ended up getting manipulated by Arjun instead LOL

Gandhari isn't even hiding her displeasure. sis.

Duryodhan has the funniest smile, it sends me cracking everytime he smiles. like, it is very clear that his intentions aren't pure, but this is Yudhishthira he is lying to.

Not the Pandavas doing different things in the same room XDDD

Nakul and Bhima are clearly each other's favorites. This is so sweet.

Bhima almost moaned after tasting sugar syrup. I could see that on his face.

Why...why on earth is Bhima eating a RAW Karela?!

Bhima literally conducted a science experiment to show that Duryodhan will remain to be an asshole. Perhaps making slits in the karela would have helped reduce it's bitter taste?

Yudhishthira is telling his bros to look at Duryodhan's positives. No Yudhishthira, you are the stupid one here.

[arceespinkgun]

Can you do Prowl for the character's asks ?

Character ask game

How I feel about this character

...I really don't know... I think I've felt every way possible depending on the continuity? My feelings range from "he's in my top five worst transformers characters of all time" to "I have absolutely no feelings about this guy and see him like he's a cardboard cutout" to "he's one of my all-time favorite Autobots." o_o'

All the people I ship romantically with this character

There's something about TFA and my liking ships from it that people may consider problematic, since I think TFA Prowl/Lockdown makes sense. Otherwise, I don't—WAIT after reading the Marvel comics, I have a cursed headcanon that Prowl and Wheeljack dated. People who have read the UK comics especially might understand why. And I think it was Prowl who would have broken up with Wheeljack for doing shit like this! And does anybody remember that time Prowl put himself in mortal danger and Wheeljack just ran away, back to base, to go be scared by a polar bear? XD

My non-romantic OTP for this character

This probably sounds very hypocritical, but I did like the friendship between him and Jazz in some older media. Unfortunately, as a huge Jazz fan, I can't think of any other friend Jazz has ever had who's been shown supporting him and asking him about how he's feeling, who Jazz has been shown openly expressing negative emotions with.

My unpopular opinion about this character

Do I have a popular opinion is the true question lol If I have to pick just one unpopular opinion, I guess it would be that IDW Prowl and IDW2 Prowl together are some of the worst, most overrated TF characters ever. Not just because they're immoral and obnoxious, but because it's so damaging for THAT to be the most influential version of the guy in the Autobot insignia!!!

One thing I wish would happen / had happened with this character in canon.

I really wish that the progression from like, Marvel to Dreamwave to TFA had continued and Prowl had become a better and better character. Honestly, it's not even really the character who's to blame for what happened due to IDW, it's the writers for having bad taste and shitty politics and fans for the same. Plenty of transformers had one-off awful versions of themselves that fans reject. I wish that had happened here, but it didn't.

[smooshi-graysimp]

I feel that there can be potential darkness in Larry and Lawrie and I will not not cook about it even if it’s trash

I’ve seen people draw L+L silly, goofy all that stuff and it’s not wrong it’s fun still. Thing is I think people think that L+L are 100% good (maybe I don’t think I seen enough L+L content tbh).

But I have a question, do they have morality?

You see in their voicelines they’ve never said they’ll do it for the good of people only that rules are the best and people should follow the rules.

Now listen Morality can equal to laws but laws can’t be equal to morality

For example, there could’ve been laws that hurt a certain minority or laws that would’ve shield people away from the truth of their country or something. You know dictators control.

And personally I think they’re more laws than morality or at least choosing laws over people/morality.

In my HC they prob see the world in a black and white situation. You’re either good or bad and though while there may be some cases that it’s gray I think they wouldn’t think about too much or they’ll follow the rules even if they care.

(Though this is a bit of a bad take since I HC Lawrie as trans but then again apparently there’s Transphobic Trans People soo there’s that but there’s still plenty of ways to explore this though)

And with this, this is why I like contrasting or have them interacting with Willow and Angelo.

Both Willow and Angelo are unapologetically themselves, yes they are mean and toxic but they’re themselves enjoying what they like.

And with their toxicity L+L have to control them the very thing that Willow and Angelo don’t like.

Which is why I like thinking interactions of them, it’s mostly comedy but I think there can be potential well say foils or opposite viewpoints ish.

Again Angelo and Willow are unapologetically themselves mean and toxic but what if I told you there can be still morality ish to them?

Ex: They can be mean to other mean or even worse people.

Plus they could have gray viewpoints (or I guess black ish gray they’re more in the selfish side)

Ex: I feel like both of them (or Angelo) would know that no matter what people will still hate you. You may be absolute perfection doing nothing wrong following rules and being a good person overall. People will still hate you. And plus you have yourselves you don’t need anyone to approve of what you are, you have yourself to be approve of. And so they don’t have to be nice to everyone. Yes selfish, but so everyone else is actually. And that person you hate that also hate you? There could be a very valid reason that they hate you. Heck you’re maybe the problematic one here. (Long story short basically the song Villain by Stella Jang)

And with their contrasting viewpoints L+L would be like “we’re just trying to help people and have them follow rules!” And Willow and Angelo “rules mules do you have any idea that they can be bad and toxic too?” L+L “I see you have chosen death” Willow and Angelo “see here you are wanting to help people but wanting to kill us? Aren’t we people too? Monsters can be human and human can be monsters. Anyways ew we’re speaking like we have morality so like- HAHAHAHA NOPE FOR FUN 4EVER FOOLSSSS”

Or if Willow and Angelo have a sad backstory (in my HC Willow getting taken advantage of and Angelo being rejected and hated by bigotry and yes that does make them hypocrites when doing the same to others but victims can be a holes too, maybe internalized hatred arc?) “then why didn’t people like YOU help us prevent from being THIS?” L+L “O_O, damn we’re sorry we can help-“ W+A “Ha? Help? Nahhhh we got this covered lmao we don’t neeeeeed help we have ourselves.”

(Also it has just occurred to me that L+L and W+A both have something to do with control so there’s that)

Oh and ig it also makes sense for the Starr park lore where Larry and Lawrie seemingly good is actually controlling people.

Other than that, that’s my rant, I feel like I badly explain this esp with Angelo and Willow morality thing part, and esp that there’s prob but most likely better people with gray morality thing (though it has just occurred to me… that Gray would’ve been the one DAMN IT- yea I see Gray as being part of Gray morality) but I do hope I get my point across people.

[jacksgreysays]

For "Hail to the Queen: She Who Leads The Armies", you could make it early on (leading a ROOT rebellion against Danzo) or very late (leading the survivors of earlier attempts to kill/seal Kaguya to victory).

The first option would be kind of like her toppling the traitor, but it could be done in an interesting way if Danzo nabbed Shikako for ROOT without permission

The second option would be really interesting to me because I don't think she'd lead the initial strike. That would probably be the Kages or Naruto or something. No, she would only lead if she felt she had to.

Hi aryaokayfriend, thanks for the ideas, I definitely had a lot of fun playing with them!

To begin, like with many things, I didn’t actually consume Shippuden so I only know a vague idea of what was going on with the multinational coalition against Kaguya, but to be fair it’s not as if that’s stopped me before, lol.

My immediate thought for the first option might be too similar to She Who Kills The Kingslayer because it went as such:

If this is a ROOT!Shikako (either fully stolen to be a ground soldier or a more subtle “still get to keep her name, possible successor” type of thing) then the most opportune time to take out Danzo would be in the absolute chaos that is the Sound-Sand Invasion during the Konoha Chuunin Exams

Unsure if this is canon or not, but didn’t Danzo have ROOT stand down during the invasion rather than have them, you know, help/defend the village?

ROOT!Shikako kills Danzo in a plausible deniability type of way and seizes control of ROOT for herself so that she can get them involved in the defense of the village.

If we want to go with that slight morbid/absurdist humor that is endemic to ROOT!Shikako, her thought process could be: 1) there’s a giant snake/bijuu outside the village. 2) in my mission history, explosions are good at removing threats/obstacles. 3) the largest explosion I have immediate access to is the one that triggers upon Danzo’s death. 4) Danzo has repeatedly stated that the greatest honor/duty of a loyal/perfect shinobi is to die in defense of Konoha. 5) Surely Danzo is a loyal/perfect shinobi and would want to die in defense of Konoha? => In conclusion, I should kill Danzo in order to set off a giant explosion to attack the giant snake/bijuu because it’s what he would want.

But, again, that’s running a little too close to She Who Kills The Kingslayer maybe and has less to do with the leading of the ROOT forces and more to do with the coup against Danzo which in itself also similar to She Who Ousts The Traitor…

So let’s see… the co-opting of ROOT forces could also happen without the KCE and without defeating Danzo first… OOH, okay, I have been reading a lot of Clone Wars fic lately, one of which is Supreme Chancellor Obi-Wan Kenobi in which, you know, it’s in the title. But basically if the ROOT secrecy seal worked more like the order chips in the clones and Shikako as, you know, a seal master can interface with it.

It might be something like she hasn’t yet figured out how to remove it without killing the ROOT agents or without tipping off Danzo that someone is removing seals since she’d only really be able to do it one by one (and, hey, guess who would be suspect number one and would have to deal with even more assassination attempts). But what she CAN do is essentially “reassign” who the “Admin” is such that Danzo no longer has access to the seal—especially the obedience forcing part—although he can still order them normally (and depending on how loyal/afraid/groomed the ROOT agent is, they may still obey even without the seal MAKING them) and/or use his Sharingan.

So she does have an army but it’s… pretty bad…. ethically… seeing as how she’s essentially exploiting a slavery seal for herself O_O

Okay, pivot, how do we salvage this?

In a similar co-opting of a seal that has an in-built obedience aspect but in a less problematic way—and this one maybe fits option two a little better—what if she hijacks the Edo Tensei?

And, so that it avoids being exploitative on Shikako’s end, what if by freeing the zombies they don’t necessarily have to obey Shikako in a brainwash-y kind of way but more in a summoning contract/genie wish type of way. Like a reverse of Freedom’s Just Another Word in which Zabuza is extremely haunted and the reason why his actions don’t make sense is because in order for each of his ghosts to move on he has to complete a task for each of them and there’s like… 29 different ghosts with 29 different motivations so...

In this case, Shikako removes the obedience part of the Edo Tensei but in order for them to get to go back to the Pure Lands they have to do one task for Shikako. And, well, depending on how bleak the situation is in the war against Kaguya or Madara or… whoever… she may use them as an immortal army against the big bad…

BUT it’d also be pretty funny if there’s just SO MANY of them that she makes them do menial tasks or, like, her paperwork and honestly they may just make her Hokage for a week so that she can have the Edo Tensei zombies do all the backed up paperwork and then she can hand it back to the real Hokage. So Kakashi technically makes her Nanadaime for a week, she makes the zombies do a bunch of rebuilding and paperwork and relatively benign tasks, and then she either passes it back to Kakashi or onwards to Naruto.

But back to the serious version of this. It could very well be a Return of the King moment in which the Elemental coalition is absolutely getting their asses kicked and Shikako’s like: stall for an hour, I have an idea, and then she breaks the obedience part of the Edo Tensei and now she’s got a ghost/zombie army. And, well, like in Return of the King how do you see that and NOT give that person some kind of extreme leadership role?

[windor-truffle]

more thoughts on tales of graces~

i forgot that there's a brief in-game challenge of running from the Fendelian tanks to lure them to the hill, but it became hilariously easy since one of the perks i added to my new game+ was increased field running speed 😅 i literally ran in circles around them for a minute before my hubris eventually caught up. (i should have mentioned the speed-up thing before, it was frankly startling when i started the new file and kid!asbel was zipping around at unnatural speeds like something out of a horror movie 😂)

sopheria seeds are MASSIVE, they're like the size of the flower! o_O i thought they reproduced by turning into sparkles and flying across the world?? do they produce seeds after that???

the npc kid who was down bad for Hubert STILL talks about him 7 years later. i respect her commitment for not moving on to someone more available. maybe she's a gold digger lol (Anise who?)

meanwhile dudebro friend here is the Larry Butz of this game:

i like that one of Asbel's artes is called Concussive Bolt. he went to knight school to learn the subtle arte of BONK

⬇ I know what Asbel means here considering he hasn't been back since he was a kid, but he was also living in a dorm for 7 years, how does his room seem small:

Further observations of the duality of NPCs 😂:

it's a little strange to me that the royal army doesn't think it can lend support to Lhant due to the feudal system of independent states. like i'm far from an expert on feudal monarchies but i think Lhant still pays like a tithe to the king so wouldn't losing that land to a foreign country only hurt the monarchy in general? I can understand not taking sides if it was two different states of Windor in-fighting but this is literally a foreign invasion, they'd be losing valuable land, money, and resources. Lhant may be small but it has two seaside ports, ample farmland, and a cryas mine apparently (the lore mentions this multiple times. why don't you ever go there in the game? 🤔) this NPC backs me up though:

my favorite pathetic drenched meow-meow:

⬇ why. why is this plot point of a potential traitor in Lhant never addressed. was it an idea that was scrapped later and has traces left in the script or was it never meant to be a thing and i'm just reading way too much into it 😅 either way, i ended up running with the idea in my own fic so yayyyy free angst 💜

⬇ Hubert is SUCH a bitch during this part 😂 also he's projecting so hard, I don't recall kid Asbel ever running from a fight. and WHO'S being prideful now??

If you can believe it, my current long fic draft of the Asbel-gets-kicked-out-of-his-own-house sequence is actually LESS angsty than canon 😅

i am NOT skilled enough at this battle system to beat Hubert in combat. Sorry Asbel, I tried 😅

[liquidstar]

(quotes i like from your WIP 4/4) i'm really surprised polaris has no experience hunting w/ that spear she carries around O_O since she carries it around, you know, i'd guessed she knows how to use it 😭 

which is partially related to my next point: i loved how many times i was reading and had thought, "*points* Inuk-coded" :D everything from how she quietly complained when her compass broke, rather than screaming (even though she was already hungry, + cold and uncomfortable in wet clothes T~T), to how she took a deep breath to compose herself, to how she comforts herself gently... so good... Polaris Inuk(-coded) moments... 🥲 you thought out her actions so well!!! and you also thought out how, even though she has clearly been influenced by Inuit(-coded) culture, she still has distance from the traditional Inuit(-coded culture's) way of life (i.e. she doesn't know how to fish) bc she was raised by someone non-Inuk(-coded) :0 !!! DETAILS!!!! 🤩

YEAH SHE HAS NO EXPERIENCE i wanted to make it pretty clear shes really not used to it at all and is kinda fumbling around, because its not actually hers! well, it is now, but it wasnt always. so shes tryinggg shes very green still. i do intend for there to be multiple scenes of her training w her teammates and other guild members to get better at stuff like this too

BUT IM GLAD YOU THINK SO BC I THINK ABT THE ARTICLE AND STUFF YOU SEND ME WHILE WRITING HER. i wanna do my best obviously, so i try to keep it in mind esp when shes dealing w stressful circumstances or things that may make someone angry. she shant yell. BUT thats also part of why the hunger is being emphasized bc (spoilers in case i post this bit later ig?) after a particularly stressful encounter with two idiots (guess who) which saiph intercepts, she actually does Kind Of yell at him. its nothing crazy, pretty tame by others standards, but in the next scene she feels reaaaallly embarrassed and guilty for acting that childish and pretty much immediately apologizes. and then also reveals that it wasnt just a skipped breastfed, she hadnt eaten for like 4 days to which hes like "dude i get cranky after a few hours PLEASE dont feel bad. also please order seconds wtf" she was in that forest for a minute.

AND (end spoilers sorry!) about the fishing too- shes also lived a pretty isolated life from a lot of things, partly due to herself being so... self-isolating. theres a reason she kept being called "the lone girl" through the little excerpt! like yes because shes alone, of course, but shes Literally the lone girl. thats her. but not for long!

[kitkatt0430]

There is a new episode of the Flash where apparently they're doing a mold inspection instead of just doing air quality testing on their own? Seriously? I know I'm not the only one going O_o at this setup.

Maybe the actual episode will make it work somehow? Time for me to find out.

And we're starting in 2123, so a hundred years from now. STAR Labs is the Flash museum with a statue of Barry out front. I can't tell from the angle of the opening shot but I assume the building's exterior still has not been repaired.

someone is poking around with flashlights, dressed mysteriously and headed for the weapons vault. This is clearly fine and normal.

There's an actual security response. Oh my gosh. I mean, its still ineffective, but wow. STAR Labs is gonna have security one hundred years from now. Finally.

Sorry, I think my sarcasm level may be extra high today, please bear with me.

The intruder escapes through a breach of some kind. And the camera closes in on the date the episode is set, which is foreshadowing the mold inspection going wrong, i guess.

It's weird that this is being sold to us as a mold inspection, though? The inspection certificate with the date on it is specifically having to do with the Department of Energy. Why they need a DOE inspection, I have no idea. Are they finally gonna use the pipeline to generate energy for the city or something?

I should just... watch, I guess.

Barry painting Nora's crib and getting all excited about being a dad is adorable. He's also super happy about getting Iris whatever food she may be craving, in this case ice cream. And then it turns out Iris tracked down a magazine that had once featured Henry Allen on the cover - science and medicine journal - and that's just so sweet of her. Barry has so little left from his parents after his mom's death and his dad's arrest...

This is West-Allen at it's best right here. Barry and Iris taking care of each other and showing how much they love each other. (Proof that when they work, they really work.)

Okay, so the mold inspection is because Barry is over-reacting to the whole wanting to make everything safe for Nora now, now, now. What a mold inspection has to do with the DOE is... *shrugs* I think I'm just gonna have to handwave this connection.

Apparently Khione is headed off to spend time with Carla, who wants to get to know this iteration of her daughter. Khione deserves to make family connections, so I hope this goes well. Carla messed things up with Caitlin, but did make inroads in fixing it, so hopefully she'll accept Khione for herself and get some catharsis over Caitlin and Frost's deaths. Khione is afraid of botching things, because she isn't Caitlin and not being Frost already made things go sour with Blaine. I wonder if we'll actually get to see their coffee meetup or if it'll just be discussed afterwards so we know it went okay.

Anyway, the mold inspector brings friends because asking for an inspection set off code alerts or whatever? I'm calling so much BS. That is not how things work. And since STAR Labs hasn't been operating as an active research lab, it doesn't really matter what else is or isn't up to code.

Bet Barry's regretting letting Chester have the day off now.

Iris shows up to join in the fun and rescue Barry from his bad decisions. And it's becoming more and more clear that these inspectors don't know what the hell they're doing. I mean, the electrician doesn't know what the breaker box is called?

At least Barry and Iris lampshade it.

And the temporal anomaly kicks in, herding everyone back to the speed lab repeatedly where a rather nice grandfather clock has appeared. Ticking loudly and ominously.

Barry - I can run to the future and find out how we fix this and then come back and... fix it. Iris - This seems like a bad idea. Barry - TIME TRAVEL!! What could go wrong? Iris - Everything, but whatever. Just bring me back a snack.

Barry once again jumps to time travel as the answer. *sigh* He never learns, does he?

So I want to like Allegra and Chester's date, but the jokes over scrabble feel forced. No one says 'za' instead of 'pizza'. Allegra's concerns about being found out as a meta are just kinda... not treated seriously before segueing into Chester rambling about how amazing Allegra is and how he's in love with her. Which freaks them both out. There isn't a second of that scene that isn't awkward or uncomfortable.

Back with the main plot, Barry uses the speed lab to get up to time traveling speed and some kind of wave changes Iris' outfit into this pretty blue dress with gold accents. She looks great. Barry's attempt to reach the future fails and watching him smack into a wall is hilarious.

Nice try, Barry. Fix this without cheating.

Looks like everyone else got new outfits too. Barry's is kinda Star Trek TNG/DS9/VOY era uniform looking, with a Flash symbol where the combadge would go. That had to be a deliberate choice. :D

And now Barry's been outed as the Flash to four new people. Secret identity made of swiss cheese.

At least the inspectors reactions are funny. Especially the guy who faints. And after some technobabling, we get the conclusion that one of the inspectors is the time traveling thief from the start of the episode.

My money is on the electrician, but she could also just be like me and sometimes just has words disappear from her vocabulary. I have definitely forgotten words I use every day before because my brain just blanks them out for a bit. But this is a tv show, so it seems more likely she's the culprit than the red herring.

Meanwhile, game day at Cecile's continues to be boring. This is the most awkward game of Catan I've ever seen.

Cecile - I'm gonna escape to the kitchen. Chester - No, actually you stay. I shall flee away, away.

Thankfully we're now back to the main plot and they're all speculating on who the time thief could be. Iris is having fun playing with the tech to clear everyone. And then one of the inspectors got replaced with a statue. Whoops. No closer to escaping yet, and the statue is one of those nude statues with the fig leaf.

Electrician is definitely the bad guy, she accuses Iris.

Inspector Dude #2 - Not Mrs. Flash!

lol, he's adorable.

Allegra's trauma flashbacks to Nash and Esperanza's death... *sniffle*

Show writers baiting me making me think that Cecile is gonna talk about her first marriage that failed... and then she doesn't. Hissss, I want back story, that's more interesting than the Allegra/Chester shilling.

Iris and Barry finally having that frank conversation they pretended to have in the first episode of the season is great. And I'm glad they're having Iris talk so frankly about how uncomfortable being pregnant is for her and how distressing it can be. She doesn't regret it, but the way it messes with her body and brain makes it tough on her in a way Barry can support her through, but not totally understand.

And their talk gives Barry the Eureka moment he needs to figure out who the time thief is.

Hehehe, Mrs. Flash, I love it every time he says that.

Barry - Blatantly making up bullshit about the electrical in the building. Electrician - Uhhhhh O_O I don't know enough to call bullshit because I'm not really an electrician.

Awww, two more inspectors down. :(

Lady Chronos... I can't get over her face. The makeup decisions were... interesting.

Barry - Oooh, I'm a lightning generator. I can power your belt. Lady Chronos - Working with the Flash. Ewwww.

Yay, resetting the time magnet reset the inspectors, this time with the real electrician. And the inspectors don't seem to remember what happened. Probably for the best they don't remember Barry's the Flash.

Khione - I could have told you there's no mold. Barry - ............ *expression says he feels dumb now*

So confirmation we don't get to see Carla and that Khione's coffee meetup with her went well. Carla managed to do what Blaine failed at, by wanting to get to know Khione for herself. Good job Carla.

At this point it seems like they're never gonna pick up on that plot thread with Carla gaining ice powers or her own frosty alter ego, which is a shame. But at least she's in the background trying to do right by Khione.

Allegra tracks down Chester to make things right. If nothing else, though I may not like their ship, I do hope the show will end with them happy.

Vibe-accinos. I'm so glad Cisco has a Jitter's drink. He deserves it.

The ending is more cute, domestic West-Allen.

While not the best episode of the season - either the heist episode with the Rogues or the previous episode focused on Iris and Nia are currently that for me - this was a solid and fun episode. It did much better with the temporal anomaly concept than the season opener and did a much better job of addressing Barry and Iris' different ways of dealing with their current circumstances, giving Iris room to voice her feelings without invalidating her or otherwise kicking the can down the road.

Since we're stuck with the Chester/Allegra ship, even though it's forced to the point of awkwardness at all times... Chester is adorable when he's happy. He's got such a lovely smile. And Allegra does deserve to have a relationship where she loves someone and not have it end with that person dying. I do like that the big loves of her life mentioned prior to Chester are all platonic/familial, making it clear that her non-romantic loves were just as important to her as her current romantic one.

The trailer for the next episode makes it look like the breather episodes are over and we're moving on to the final arc of the show. Bloodwork is back, as is Wally, Dig, Oliver, and the multi-verse.

Barry - *hugs Oliver* Oliver - I'm allergic to feelings, you're giving me hives. Stop it. Barry - *hugs more*

I'm guessing this final arc will have Khione come into her own as a hero? I mean, they haven't done anything that justifies killing Caitlin to create her yet, so they've gotta do that before the season ends. And this is a short season, right?

Finally... Barry's birthday was previously established as being in March, but now they're celebrating it in April from the looks of things in the trailer? *heavy sigh*

[autisticidiot]

my spider-man collection !! + loadssss of my rambling (as per usual) and a calculation of how much it costs cuz @marshber's post had me curious about mine !! :3 a lot of my collection is just gifts from people hehe ^_^ the images r all over the place..

ohh my god it's so blurry T_T anyways,, 11 comics, 4 magazines and 1 omnibus :3 i stopped getting the magazines because uhhh.. i couldn't find them in my co-op anymore aha. also they were kinda pricy i guess.. they had these lil plastic toys sometimes. made me feel bad for some reason lol,, @-@ maybe i'll get some specific one of the website but uh yeah.

i think all my comics feature chameleon hehe ☆(ゝω·)v except the daily bugle one. that was my first !!

my plushes !! i thinkkk the first one i got was the 2nd one. his head is like that because he got lobotomised and had to get stitched back up ! ^_^ his head was still kinda funny looking before that though lol. the one i got after that is the squishmallow !! it was a birthday gift from my friend !! yayayaya it's my favourite of the bunch. very soft (๑•̀ㅁ•́ฅ✧ the b i g head one makes thwip sounds !!

oh and my bed covers !! i love them a lot :]

my figures (ignore the black blob pls >_<‶) + some extra !! that gwen helicopter turns into a motorcycle !! i got it for free :3 it's part of a set i think but i don't have it. the lil spidey is a rubber !! it was a mystery thing. i wanted to get one of the villains,, but i suppose nothing beats good old spidey >_^

i keep shocker and electro in the packaging because umm.. it's easier to store lol. and i would keep the packaging anyway it's nice :3 i still have the packaging for my pins lol and chameleon is forever imprisoned because he's made of lead i think. apparently it's fine but i'm an anxious person lol

i loveeee the feel of mayhem's hair.. and i just really like the pop. prowler's heads broken 😔 he was like that when i first got him. tried to fix him but it just broke again.. maybe it's meant to be  o(TωT)o 

..and everything else !! (+ stuff that i forgot to put in the others lol)

i wear that spider-man shirt for like everything lol !! with a specific pair of jeans. and spider-man socks :P AND OH WAIT I FORGOT TO PUT MY SPIDER-MAN VANS.. ill put those after this !! :3 there's 2 more pairs of socks but they're in the wash.

my spider-man water bottle is scuffed because it fell out of my bag and spent a day outside o_o

my spider-man vans !! <3

anyways the total price of this !! retail price. and converted to pounds if needed. unless it doesn't say and i can't find it then it's just estimated. and im really bad at estimating !! and i may have accidentally added a couple more or less !! is: £484.83

.. woah !! i think the vans do a lot of heavy lifting since (from what i searched online..) the retail price is $134.99.. but um yeah wow (´⊙ω⊙`)

[edns]

So I saw your character on mortallychaotickingdom’s Des spouse post and I was wondering, who is Vincent Frey?

Sorry I’m just trying to look for him in the tags and I don’t know where he’d be, and I’m curious to know more

Hello there traveler

It seems I have to bring out the Time Paradox again... Vincent Frey is a character of an ancient fancomic I was working on, as well as a bunch of my original stories (the fancomic is kind of like a crossover? Maybe

The premise is that after the events of Azran Legacy Desmond gets visited by a mysterious time traveler from the future (that's Vincent), Bronev breaks out of jail, and a bunch of shenanigans ensue featuring a lot of characters of mine. It's really self-indulgent.

(Cover of the second chapter which unfortunately never happened)

You may have seen the comic floating around tumblr, by the way. I have moved accounts on here since then for personal reasons.

In fact I was thinking of revamping the whole thing again. It was fun to work on, but the writing was . Bad and not structured at all, and the art was even worse (by my standards which may be high lol). It feels bad to have such an idea sit unfinished forever

Oh yes, and I don't tag the names of my characters. Sorry about that... I just don't feel like people care enough, I'm surprised to be wrong o_o

[drama-glob]

Bayonetta @ Stella's party (7): Stella angrily asks Bayonetta, "You dare show up like it's your right? Who are you to invite yourself into my home without my final word?" Bayonetta says, "It's frankly rather rude of you not to invite me after all this time, considering how much of a party animal I heard you were. Besides, women of my caliber don't need an invitation, & since you've been a most 'gracious' hostess by far, just how can I think of leaving?" For emphasis, she pets an imp servant.

I feel bad for that imp because he may get brutally attack or fired by Stella later even though it isn't their fault. O_O

[brokenrobot2004]

DeerHead EMC-V2

My 3D printer is probably done for good (or for a very long time) after I've looked into it's situation further and tried a few more things to get it functional again, but I wanted to keep working on this robot so bad that I'd gotten corrugated plastic, and paperboard to try and do a cleaner recreation of it's original form, in something that won't collapse beneath itself; I think it's working awesome so far, currently any problems I'm experiencing are now due to my own design flaws, one pesky servo (One for the in-and-out movement of the back right leg that seems over-greased, even after I'd tried to clean alot of it off which was maybe a dumb idea but it was worth a shot; it can move, but moves very slow and often if I try to make it move too far from it's last position, too fast instead of easing into it slowly, the power surges), and my servo controller being quite noisy, leading to it having jitters that sometimes get so bad they make the Arduino reset; if there's no way to get to the bottom of that without replacing the controller, I feel like I probably will eventually just because it seems like this one (PCA9685) isn't really supported at all anyways compared to other controllers out there and I've already thought of replacing it earlier on in the project but wanted to power through! I think it's good enough to work on for the time being though :] though at the same time, the animations I'm doing are being based in Tim's Servo Program, which is written in binary specifically for this controller; meaning if I got a new one, it better be early on and not after I've done most of, if not all of the core animations! (Sitting, standing, walking and turning, walking at different speeds, anger, sadness, excitement, fear, kicking ball and other ball-related interactions, things along those lines; just baseline animations!)

I only have one picture for now, taken with my ultra-HD 4K 10 million billion trillion megapixel laptop camera XD I took another one, but the stupid camera app seemed to eat it, since it wasn't in the gallery. He's way more chihuahua-like in head shape now too, featuring big floppy ravioli ears like little puppy chihuahuas have in particular ^_^ which wasn't entirely intentional, but because they turned out that way I think it's super cute so I'm happy with it anyways! I tried to make a walking animation for him, which I filmed, but the video has my face in it; I may censor my face and upload it to YouTube sometime, alongside the video there is of EMC-V1 walking; which surprisingly, turned out better than when I made this iteration walk which I'm a little worried about ,':1c I actually think that's soley because I didn't remember to make the dog enter a slightly-crouching stance to take it's steps, like an Aibo does, which was written right on my sketchbook but I was too tired to have skimmed past it because by the time I was finished actually building the new body, it was very late O_o'

Epic laptop camera moment!!! Surely you can comprehend the writing through those like, five pixels? Looks like it was taken on a 3DS, the bloody thing! ToT Anywho, that's the scoop on DeerHead for tonight!! I'm hoping I'll get him to successfully move around without help soon, but if not, I feel like I should get a servo controller that's more specifically meant for projects like this and have software to work with, or compatible Blender add-ons (Robotics and Blender working as one?! I'd nearly want to jump for joy if I got to use that kind of workflow!!) anyways; then I wouldn't have to deal with those rather nasty jitters too, and only having the servos rapidly jerk through the basic frames of animation because I don't currently know if there's a way I can make smoothing happen on Arduino, and I'd otherwise have to boot up the raspberry Pi and stick the animation into there, and be at the mercy of it working.. Actually, the more I think about this process, the more I want to get a new servo controller XD I'm going to look into that a little bit!

[tehuti88-art]

1/27/23: This week's character from my anthro WWII storyline is Isaak Schindel, sans cap (top drawing) and with cap (bottom drawing). He's the Lagerälteste (kapo) at the labor camp in the story...considering that today is International Holocaust Remembrance Day (I only found out as I was drawing him), I felt it'd be terribly inappropriate to submit his art on Reddit, so he'll just go here instead.

Regarding his design, he's a fawn boxer; his character is somewhat short, stocky, and tough, so it fit. He has hazel eyes and black hair, though the latter is kept shaved throughout the series. Kapos were often granted favors such as a private room and civilian clothes; I couldn't find anything about them being allowed to keep their hair, and my character still wears striped clothes with a yellow-and-green star (he committed manslaughter before ending up in the camp), though he also wears a civilian jacket/coat with armband over top of them, and a civilian cap. He has a scar over the bridge of his nose.

TUMBLR EDIT: I was well through Schindel's sketch before a news item on TV mentioned it was International Holocaust Remembrance Day. o_o; So submitting his artwork to Reddit seemed not just potentially disrespectful but a bad idea as well, my character portraits are my least popular art and sometimes get downvoted. So I've posted him separately. Schindel's background is still HIGHLY in development and so may change drastically still, but here we go.

Isaak Schindel and his wife Rebekkah are poor, working-class Jews residing in the unnamed city of the story; they end up moved into a ghetto, which for some reason I haven't figured out, not all of the city's Jews end up in, since Josef Diamant, for example, is never sent there. (Don't know why this is. Maybe it's the poor Jews who are targeted first, whereas Diamant is middle class. This ghetto is a recent concept so still being ironed out.) Anyway, I needn't get into how difficult ghetto life is, partly because I haven't read into it a lot, partly because it's obvious. The Schindels just barely manage to make do. When Rebekkah gets pregnant, there are mixed feelings; obviously they're overjoyed at the thought of their first baby, yet worried about how they will provide for it. Schindel starts taking on shady jobs to get by, to the dismay of Rebekkah, though there are few other options.

The ghetto is patrolled by Jewish police officers. It's a complicated issue that has similarities to what Schindel himself later ends up doing. Some of them are sympathetic, some of them are Nazi collaborators. Schindel, while getting warned away from an illegal situation one day, happens to run into a sympathetic policeman who knows him and Rebekkah. He steers Schindel aside and whispers a different warning: The Nazis are planning some sort of special action centered on the ghetto. "Special action" is a term you never want to hear the Nazis use--it's NEVER good. He can't give many details, but he suspects it has something to do with the new camp that's been constructed at the edge of the city. He urges Schindel and Rebekkah to try to get out of the ghetto and out of the city while they have the chance. When Schindel presses for more info, and asks how the hell are they supposed to get out of there, the policeman has nothing else to offer, he just stresses his warning, cuffs Schindel with his nightstick, and yells at him to get lost, for appearances' sake. Schindel returns home to Rebekkah, increasingly anxious. He keeps his ears open in the following days and starts catching further rumors: The ghetto is soon to be liquidated and the able-bodied men sent to the new camp for hard labor. The women and children and the feeble...who knows. Easy guess, though. The Nazis consider pregnant Jews to be especially useless, so...you get the idea.

Let's take an aside to look at this camp. It's just begun operations, and like its fellow camps, is run by the SS-Totenkopfverbände. It's not intended as an extermination camp, though of course it can't make use of the sick, weak, or injured, so those men are subject to execution via firing squad, followed by cremation. A high-ranking SS-TV officer briefly takes charge of the camp while it's being set up and organized, but then they need to find a permanent replacement to serve as commandant. This officer requests that he be brought the files of camp guards with complaints on their records--"Excessive force, being a little too strenuous with punishments, those sort of things." He and an underling sort through these before the underling brings out a file of a guard accused of causing the death of an inmate. Big deal, the officer thinks, that happens all the time. What makes this one so unique? Well, this guard just happened to force a prisoner to go running right into the camp's electric fence. All right, so that's intriguing; the officer asks for the guard's name. Underling replies that his name is Ernst Dannecker.

Sturmbannführer (Major) Dannecker is promoted to Obersturmbannführer (Lieutenant Colonel) and called to take over. He arrives in time to watch final preparations and the first arrivals of prisoners. He isn't splashy; he seems almost bored as he observes things, and doesn't make much of a strong impression. He does select an adjutant, Maj. Lars Franke, and tells him to keep things in order as he gets settled in. The other guards get to asking around and gradually more of a picture of him emerges: In his teens he was apparently forced into the military academy by his father, against his and his mother's wishes, and several fellow students-to-be witnessed some drama between the three on the railway platform; his mother collapsed after he got on the train, and one of the others jokingly called him "mama's boy,"* leading to laughter. He was doing moderately well in academy when the Great War broke out and everyone headed off to the front without the chance to say goodbye to family first. By chance, Dannecker and the former student who'd teased him came across each other--several years older now--in a trench and the other exclaimed cheerfully, "Hey look, it's Mama's Boy!"--only to promptly get decked in the face and then pummeled before several others could stop Dannecker. The other guy insisted it was just a joke, and apologized repeatedly, but people made sure to steer clear of pissing Dannecker off again: Turns out he has a hair-trigger temper concealed behind a smarmy oily exterior, and no one can really be sure what will set him off or when. There were some other rumors of him engaging in unsavory activities during the war, though he did well, earned the Iron Cross, all that. He didn't lose his military position after the armistice, though when the Schutzstaffel formed he resigned his military post to join them instead, and was assigned to a camp as a guard. (I don't think he ever serves in the Waffen-SS, though I'm unsure.) While new prisoners were arriving, several of them put up a fuss, insisting that as soldiers who'd fought for Germany, they should be freed; Dannecker recognized one of them as the man who'd taunted him (this is figured out only in retrospect)--he's now wearing a yellow star, as he's Jewish--something that was well known during the Great War as well. Witnesses said they didn't speak to each other, though the prisoner went pale, and Dannecker smiled. (Dannecker...has a f**king creepy smile, and everyone knows it's bad news.) In the following weeks he went out of his way to psychologically torment the prisoner by various means, until one day, while he was merely walking in the prisoner's direction, the other man panicked, turned, and ran at the electric fence, apparently committing suicide; the guards had to turn off power to the fence to pry his blackened fingers loose while Dannecker stood and watched. Nobody could prove he'd actually done anything, witnesses clearly saw that he didn't even touch or threaten the guy, but the incident went in his file along with several lesser offenses in which he terrorized inmates. Despite his unpredictable temper, he's also very, very patient when it comes to people who anger him in a particular way--he makes those people his "pet projects" and keeps at them until they snap. The officer who puts him in charge of the labor camp has no idea of the future consequences of this choice.

(*EDIT, OH MY GOD THIS IS A THING. It's called Muttersöhnchen, and apparently there's a sort of "psychological diagnosis" for it. Hahahaha!! Oh my I need to look up slang phrases in German more often...anyway...Dannecker's situation doesn't ENTIRELY line up with that concept. He IS a "mama's boy" of a sort, but...well, I can't get into the details, at least not here. Maybe if I ever get his profile written up. Suffice it to say it's, uh...well, skeezy, just like the rest of Dannecker's life. And it explains a lot of his behavior toward his stepfamily later. But moving on.)

Anyway, even without knowing all this stuff about Dannecker, Schindel has heard enough: He heads home in the middle of the day, surprising Rebekkah, who's not used to him being home so early. Sits her down, and insists that she help him out with a plan, since "You're the smart one, the one with a head for things." Rebekkah can't understand why he wants them to pick up and leave NOW, and tries to protest, but his demeanor is such that she finally realizes how serious he is and they make tentative plans to flee the ghetto; she knows a weak point which isn't as well patrolled by the police, and has some distant family still on the outside; perhaps they'll provide shelter. Schindel hates asking for help, which is why she knows her husband is serious about this now.

When the Nazi officials sweep through the ghetto, it comes completely by surprise--no warning aside from what the policeman had already told Schindel. They wake up at the noise and chaos going on outside and unlike many of the others, know what's happening; Rebekkah has a little pack ready to go (supplies for the baby to come--she's visibly pregnant by now) and they head out, furtively hurrying in the direction of the ghetto's weak point. Before they can reach it, however, one of the policemen accosts them, swinging his club at Rebekkah; he hits her in the arm before Schindel attacks him in return, punching him in the gut and face and sending him falling back against some bricks, where he strikes his head--killed instantly. More police arrive--Schindel yells at Rebekkah to run, and that's the last he sees of her, running away, before the police take him into custody.

Schindel (after being smacked around a little first) finds himself brought before a Nazi official who's told of how he killed a policeman. Schindel insists it was an accident, he was just protecting his wife. Nazi official says this is what men are supposed to do, defend their wives and families, so--"Manslaughter," he says to Schindel, "You can't say we aren't generous, can you?" Schindel protests, "Don't I get a trial?--a court, a judge?" Nazi official just laughs a little. "Look around, do you see a court? Your people don't get a court. But I'll make sure you get transportation."

(Brief note to say I'm fairly certain what this guy is doing isn't entirely legal, but do you really think any of his fellows would care...?)

Well, he keeps that promise--the men are herded out of the ghetto and toward the nearby railroad spur--the ghetto was placed here intentionally. They're loaded onto the waiting train and the doors are closed. The cars are so crowded the men have to stand. It takes a while to start moving, and stops not long after, just sitting on the tracks; "Why are they doing this?--if we were in a truck we'd be moving a lot faster," somebody says, to which someone else replies, "I think that's the point." And indeed, although the camp is not so far away, the train ride takes an inordinately long time, and yes this is intentional.

By now you probably know the routine, arriving at camp, selections (Schindel is told to go right), getting stripped, showered, shaved, tattooed. Schindel is utterly demoralized by the time he's presented with striped clothing and has to provide his name and have a photo taken. An officer recognizes his name--"This is the one, the one they said killed a policeman"--and a patch is placed on Schindel's shirt: A yellow-and-green Judenstern, or six-point star. He's sent out into the camp and made to get into formation with the rest of the new arrivals. An SS officer briefly details what they're to expect from now on, and they're given their new "jobs"--basically, working themselves to death, since it isn't an extermination camp but as it's put later in the story, EVERY camp is an extermination camp, just that some kill you more slowly than others.

Schindel resigns himself to this new situation--what options are there? He's surprised to find that the ghetto police, most of whom are deeply hated by the other ghetto residents, are incarcerated in the camp along with the rest of them. They were Nazi collaborators--some of them even seemed to enjoy what they were doing. What are they doing here? He locates the policeman who'd tipped him off to the raid and asks what's going on. The former policeman--now a prisoner just like him--tersely explains that it doesn't matter how useful you may have been--to the Nazis, an Untermensch is an Untermensch at the end of the day, and as soon as you outlive your usefulness, you're equal to the rest of them. Here in the camp, especially, it's expected to be every man for himself.

Schindel tries to believe this isn't true, but he sees how the regular prisoners target the former police officers, most of whom don't last very long--the SS guards, while technically not allowing fights, don't really do much to stop them, and indeed seem to find them amusing, occasionally making bets on the outcome. Schindel watches silently one day as the body of the policeman he knew is carried off, battered and bloody, to the crematorium. Thus when another inmate picks a fight with him, he has no choice but to fight back, and win. He pummels the other guy into the ground before the guards step in to stop the fight, striking Schindel a few times with their clubs and then having the other guy--unconscious, dead, Schindel doesn't know--carried away. Shortly after, a guard instructs Schindel to follow him: The commandant, Dannecker, wants to see him. Full of dread, Schindel obeys.

He's heard stories of Dannecker--the other inmates call him "Der Teufel," the Devil--but hasn't had the chance to interact with him personally, and has seen him only from afar. He's now led to the commandant, who's standing in the yard smoking a cigarette. He's taller than Schindel, and fit, but not exactly intimidating on first glance; he doesn't look like a devil. He gives Schindel a look (Schindel keeps his head down) and says, "So you're the Jew who likes killing so much." This makes Schindel wince--of course he doesn't like killing--but he doesn't protest.

Dannecker: "Name."

Schindel: "I...Isaak Schindel, Herr Kommandant."

Dannecker: (taps Schindel's chest with his crop) "Why do you wear that green patch?" [NOTE, it's actually green and yellow, but Dannecker knows what the yellow part means.]

Schindel: "M...manslaughter, Herr Kommandant."

Dannecker: "Who'd you kill?"

Schindel: "I...I killed a ghetto policeman."

Dannecker: "A policeman, huh?"

Schindel: "It was an accident, Herr Kommandant, I didn't mean to kill him."

Dannecker: "So what did you mean to do?"

Schindel: "I was just trying to protect my wife and child, Herr Kommandant."

Dannecker: "Your family...? It's always important for a man to protect his family, ja?"

Schindel: (silence)

Dannecker: (drops and stamps out cigarette, steps closer) (puts crop under Schindel's chin and forces his head up) "You like killing people, Jew?"

Schindel: "I...I don't like killing people, Herr Kommandant."

Dannecker: "Really? You seem to do it a lot, for someone who doesn't like it."

Schindel: (silence)

Dannecker: (looks around) "I don't see your wife or child. Who were you protecting this time?"

Schindel: "M...myself, Herr Kommandant."

Dannecker: "Ah...?"

Schindel: "The...the other man picked a fight with me, H-Herr Kommandant...I had to defend myself or he'd kill me."

Dannecker: "So you do like killing, ja?"

Schindel: (silence, though he's just about in tears by now)

Dannecker: (leans close, lowers his voice) "You also like an extra helping of food...? A nice, warm place to sleep, perhaps...?"

Schindel: (silence)

Dannecker: "Hm?"

Schindel: "I...I d-don't know what you mean."

Dannecker: "I mean you like killing so much, why don't you make use of it?"

Dannecker briefly lays it out: The camp needs a Lagerälteste, or kapo, to help the guards oversee the prisoners. Dannecker's camp isn't a big one, so technically he could do without a prisoner functionary, but Franke accidentally put the idea in his head that this might be interesting: In effect, it pits the prisoners against each other, which is the sort of thing he finds entertaining. The job of kapo generally goes to criminals, since they're the ones most likely to be okay with committing violence against their fellow inmates; Schindel is an especially good candidate, given that he's already killed one person and likely another (Dannecker never clarifies whether he killed the prisoner or not, though he hints that he did--this is pretty typical of him). If Schindel wants the job, it means putting up with the fact that EVERYONE will now hate him--both the SS guards he serves, and his fellow prisoners, whom he'll oversee on the Nazis' behalf--he'll have a giant target on his back. But it also means extra food rations...a private room to sleep in...and no beatings. Schindel despises the very thought of working for these awful people who took him from his family...but his family is the only thing keeping him going so far. Dannecker offers him the chance to survive long enough to get back to them. He's already killed somebody...it can't be that bad, just to try to stay alive. Anyone else would do it, right? Although it nauseates him to his core, he takes the offer. And Dannecker smiles his devil smile.

Schindel assumes it's going to be a trick, but nope, he's given a small but private room, extra food, better shoes, a cap and jacket to wear with an authoritative armband, and a club to carry. He rises every morning with the guards and rouses the prisoners from their barracks and out into the yard for roll call, then wanders through the yard throughout the day, making sure everyone's doing their jobs. It grows easier over time to tap, then smack someone with his stick, then to give someone a beatdown if they get too far out of line. (For a while he even socializes, in a sort of way, with a guard named Jan Delbrück, who occasionally stands in the yard with him and shares cigarettes, at least until Dannecker decides Delbrück is better off sorting papers in a file room.) Dannecker holds up his end of the arrangement in that Schindel is never on the receiving end of any beatings, but Dannecker never said anything about his trademark psychological torture--he inflicts that on everyone, prisoners and guards alike--even his own adjutant, Maj. Franke, isn't exempt. Watching him target others this way, including occasionally himself, Schindel finally gets why they call him Der Teufel. He's fortunate that he never ends up one of what everyone calls Dannecker's "pet projects"--these are relatively rare, since their execution takes such a massive amount of time and effort, and most people are careful not to piss Dannecker off enough to go through with this. Simple beatings (usually performed by his guards or Schindel) or gunshots to the head are usually enough to do the trick.

Schindel gets the chance to witness Dannecker pull off a pet project firsthand when a new prisoner named Josef Diamant arrives at the camp. Diamant is Schindel's opposite in many ways--not a family man, a skilled worker (he's a jeweler/watch repairer with his own shop), middle class, educated. But still--Jewish. And like Schindel, he sports a yellow-and-green star, marking him as a criminal--except his offense is even worse than Schindel's--he didn't kill anyone, but he did forge documents that helped numerous other Jews escape the country. The SS vandalized his shop and tortured him with his own jeweler's tools to get the names of his clients, but he didn't give them up; so, to the camp he went. He doesn't capture Schindel's, or anyone's, attention when he arrives, just another prisoner, but that changes one day when Dannecker loses his temper--actually a rare occurrence--and starts beating an inmate. Everyone just stops what they're doing and watches--nobody intervenes. Then, a noise--a prisoner (probably Lukas Mettbach) lets out a short, cut-off warning, but Diamant is already on the move. As Dannecker is bringing his stick down at the cowering prisoner, Diamant strikes it from his hand and sends it flying into the mud. Commandant and prisoner stand there frozen, staring at each other. Everyone--Dannecker, Diamant, Franke, Schindel, the other prisoners--has the exact same expression. Absolutely nobody can believe Diamant just did that.

Everyone expects Dannecker to lay into Diamant next, but he simply lowers his arm, turns, and walks back toward the administration building. Diamant tries to help up the beaten prisoner but is shoved away--"What have you done? You've only made it worse! He'll kill us both, now!" And indeed, a murmur ripples through the camp: Dannecker is striding back, seemingly having composed himself. The prisoner gets on his knees and starts begging for forgiveness--Dannecker doesn't even stop to look at him, just pulls out his revolver and shoots him in the head. Schindel and everyone else watches as Diamant panics and goes running, Dannecker fiddling with his gun as he just continues walking after him. He corners Diamant against a wall, puts the gun to his head, and fires--nothing happens, yet Dannecker smiles and says, "Your lucky day, Jew." There's a reason Dannecker prefers carrying a revolver--easy to play Russian roulette, one of his favorite torture methods. He doesn't kill Diamant that day, but later that night, he arrives at one of the prisoners' barracks after dark and motions the guard to let him in. Schindel isn't there to see it, but other prisoners who are wakened by Dannecker's unexpected appearance murmur about it the next day. Dannecker singles out Diamant's bunk, kneels down, presses his gun to his head, and whispers a promise. Diamant is officially his new pet project.

Schindel admittedly doesn't feel too sorry for Diamant over the following weeks--he was too uppity for his own good, didn't know his place, and raised the potential of danger toward the rest of the prisoners, so of course he deserves what he gets. (A recurring theme I've noticed throughout the story is the differences between the social classes, and I figure that's part of Schindel's lack of empathy as well--Diamant used to be better off than he was, in Schindel's view he had life handed to him on a platter, it's about time he was taken down a notch.) He knows how Dannecker gets while pursuing a pet project, however, and even if he isn't the target, it makes him nervous--it's easy, as an innocent bystander, to get sucked in. And this is exactly what happens, not just to him but to others. The dominoes unintentionally set up by that SS-TV officer so long ago finally start to fall, and one of the first is Dannecker's own stepdaughter, Margarethe.

Margarethe, or Gret, is by now well known to the prisoners and guards. The oldest of Dannecker's four stepchildren and in her teens--petite (she's only about five feet tall and looks quite childlike next to her stepfather), fair skinned, blond haired, blue eyed, and stone faced--she's become Dannecker's frequent companion when he arrives at the camp in the morning (technically Dannecker should be residing on camp property, but he instead lives in a house nearby); he always helps her out of the limo and parades her, in her immaculate dress, boots, and braids, past the guards and prisoners to the main building and then to his office, where she keeps him company throughout the day. He's exceptionally proud of showing her off, and appears to spoil her, gifting her her numerous colored dresses, hair ribbons, jewelry, toys; every time they see her she's arm in arm with Dannecker or holding his hand, or he has his hand on her shoulder, the very picture of a doting father. It's only when Schindel and others look a little bit past the surface that a different picture emerges. Dannecker never brings his wife or three other stepchildren to the camp--although he spoils the others as well, Gret is the one on whom he lavishes all his attention. He's frequently seen whispering in Gret's ear, putting his arm around her and holding her a bit too close, smiling that devil's smile at her while her face always remains blank--she never laughs--never smiles. They spend a lot of time alone in his office. And a guard mentions one occasion when they were leaving, Gret's normally pristine braids were a little bit mussed and her stare a little bit glassier and more vacant than usual, and when he wished her farewell her voice was faint and hoarse. It's obvious something unpleasant is going on behind the loving facade, but nobody speaks up about it, it's not their business.

(Later in the story a character sees an old family photo of Dannecker with his parents, Walther and Margit, and despite the lack of blood relation, remarks on the resemblance between Margit and Margarethe--petite, beautiful, fair skinned, blue eyed, long blond braids. Remember "Mama's Boy"? I'll just leave it at that.)

Schindel, like the others, suspects something weird is going on, but also keeps mum. It's Diamant, of course, who acts, and sets off a complicated and dramatic string of events. It starts out with him watching Gret every time she arrives at camp; she glances at him, and he smiles at her. Diamant's smile is not like Dannecker's. Gret responds by blushing and turning away, but she starts looking for Diamant more often as she goes by. She never smiles back...but one day, she does arrive in a yellow-and-green dress. This catches Diamant's attention unlike anything else, and it catches Schindel's attention, too. He'd noticed the looks shared between the two and let it pass, but for some reason he can't explain, this incident alarms him; he shoves Diamant against a wall later on and demands to know what's up with him and Fräulein Gret. Diamant denies anything's up, insinuates maybe Schindel's the one who has a thing for the commandant's stepdaughter, gets Schindel's club shoved into his gut in response. "Mind your business, Jew!" Schindel snaps, "And eyes off Fräulein Gret." He can't think of much else to do on so little, though, and lets him be after that.

I need to pause here and back up a bit. Schindel has never liked Diamant, as I said, but by now he has an even bigger reason to despise him. I also already mentioned the tendency for Dannecker's schemes to suck in innocent bystanders; Schindel is one of them. Dannecker spends a great deal of time making Diamant's life a living hell in every way he can think of without outright killing him; just killing a pet project is no fun, it's much better to watch them slowly destroy themselves--he got a taste of that when his mere presence was enough to send his old foe running straight into the electric fence. Well, despite his patience for such things, after a while Dannecker begins to grow tired of just how long it's taking Diamant to break, so he racks his brain trying to think of something new and creative to try. And he does come up with something, and it involves Schindel. Why Schindel?--he's never crossed Dannecker, always obeyed orders, a good well-behaved obedient kapo. And that's exactly why Schindel: Dannecker has Franke bring the two prisoners to his office, where he points this out to Diamant, how obedient and broken Schindel is, and that's exactly what he has in mind for Diamant. And now he thinks he knows how to do it. Diamant is different from Schindel in another respect: Schindel is looking out for himself, whereas Diamant still has some of his altruism left. Of course Dannecker can't break him by threatening or humiliating him. He might be able to break him, however, by having him humiliate someone else--namely, Schindel.

I can't go into any detail about what exactly Dannecker does here. (Even in my writing, Diamant simply relates it himself, somewhat in passing.) When he calls Franke back, however, Diamant does indeed look positively broken inside, and Schindel is outright crying. Dannecker doesn't explain to his confused adjutant what's happened, just cheerfully tells him to return them to the yard. They leave without a word. Yet a few days later, while Schindel is overseeing the prisoners as they leave their barracks, without provocation he hits Diamant in the back of the leg, knocking him down; he then commences beating the s**t out of him, all the while screaming, "Fight back! FIGHT BACK!" Diamant covers his head but does nothing to defend himself; Franke, hearing the commotion, approaches, only to accidentally get hit in the face by Schindel. The guards knock Schindel out and he, Diamant, and Franke all go to the medical building for attention. Franke, his nose broken, warns the other two--when they regain consciousness--that they better not do such a thing again. When they've recovered enough to go back to work, they do; camp life returns mostly to normal, though Schindel does still target Diamant for a brief beatdown here and there, and unlike previously, Diamant never fights back. Franke is worried that when Dannecker finds out about the fight, he'll be angry, but all he does is smirk a little and go on with things. The dynamic between the three--Dannecker, Diamant, and Schindel--has changed.

So of course, now that Diamant seems to be up to something involving Gret, Schindel is full of dread that he hasn't learned his lesson, and could end up sucking him in again. He isn't quite clever enough to figure out what Diamant is planning, though; just that every day, a guard starts calling him away from the yard for extended periods, and he returns only when the workday is over. Then one day Schindel has actually been permitted inside the administration building to help transport some boxes of files to the back file room where Delbrück is currently occupied. He's just carried in another box and is heading back to close the door when the sound of running footsteps coming closer catches his attention. As he watches, somebody flies past, abruptly stumbling to a halt as soon as he sees Schindel looking--it's Diamant, and he has no guards with him. The two of them stare at each other for a moment, eyes wide. More footsteps come running and now Gret appears, also giving Schindel a look; the three stare at each other in silence a brief moment before Gret grasps Diamant's sleeve, urges, "Come on," and the two hurry on up the hallway and out of sight. Schindel can't be sure, but he could've sworn that for at least the last few seconds, Diamant's eyes were pleading for him to go with them. His feet are rooted to the spot, however, and he stays--good obedient Schindel. His legs start to work again and he shuts the door and slowly walks back into the room, his brain belatedly recalling something else odd about what he just saw: Diamant was carrying a revolver--and Gret was carrying a giant Ehrendegen--an SS honor sword, exactly like the one Dannecker wears. He returns to the files and to Delbrück, who hasn't noticed anything amiss; he jumps when Franke arrives, expecting some sort of awful news, but Franke just wonders why they're taking so long with the files and says to hurry it up, then leaves. Schindel waits, and waits, filling with more and more dread, yet nothing happens. After about an hour, he's almost convinced himself he imagined the whole thing, when the camp alarm finally starts to sound. Something awful has indeed happened.

Delbrück, just as startled and confused, exits the room with Schindel close behind to figure out what's going on. Other guards are racing back and forth through the building, eyes wide, faces pale; Delbrück accosts a few, catches a few comments, grabs Schindel's sleeve and goes running himself, toward Dannecker's office. A big crowd of guards is gathering here, and Franke is berating one of them loudly. When he spots Delbrück and Schindel he lays into the kapo immediately--"And YOU! Where were you? What did you have to do with this?" Schindel, of course, has no idea what's happening, and cowers behind Delbrück, who fortunately vouches for him: "He's been with me all day, in the file room! What's going on? What's with the alarm?" Franke says there's been a prisoner escape--that much Schindel had guessed on his own. Then he says that Commandant Dannecker is dead--THAT, Schindel had had no clue.

The rest of the details seep out over time. A while back, Gret Dannecker had requested a gift from her stepfather--a ring. Always willing to spoil her, Dannecker had his guards fetch Diamant--a jeweler. Sure, Dannecker had been torturing him for weeks, including ramming a jeweler's file through his hand, permanently damaging the nerves--but Diamant agreed to design and make a ring for Gret, with the right tools and materials. Dannecker set up a temporary workshop near his office and gave Diamant the required tools--under strict supervision--and materials (including gold bits taken from prisoners' teeth); the reason for Diamant's daily visits to the administration building was to work on Gret's ring. Nobody's quite sure of the details after that, but apparently supervision of Diamant's activities slacked off a little, enabling him to be alone with Dannecker when he presented him with the ring--somehow, he acquired a gun, and shot and killed Dannecker before escaping with about a dozen other prisoners in what was obviously a coordinated effort, plotted ahead of time. Even more alarming is that Gret Dannecker, who was visiting that day, is also missing--presumably taken hostage by Diamant. He hates that he has such thoughts--Schindel has nothing against Gret, she's been polite to him the few times they've interacted--but he suspects the situation isn't quite as it appears. It isn't long before these suspicions are confirmed.

Franke attempts to assume command of the camp, a decision which doesn't go over well with the other guards; when one of the guards stands up to him, he orders Schindel to beat him. Schindel freezes--he doesn't mean to disobey, but he's not permitted to touch the SS guards, so he has no idea how to react. Franke loses his temper, grabs Schindel's club, and beats the guard unconscious himself while everyone else watches, before warning the other guards not to provide him with help or he'll do the same to them; he storms back into the building, and locks himself in Dannecker's office. Schindel notices the other prisoners edging toward the unconscious guard with murder in their eyes; he picks up his club and brandishes it threateningly so they back off, though one of them spits at him first. He sits by the guard for the rest of the day and night; the other guards never announce meal time, never call the prisoners back to work or to their barracks. The camp is in effect left to itself until another Obersturmbannführer arrives the next day, alerted by a guard who'd fled during the beating; he approaches Schindel first and demands to know what's going on. Schindel explains the best he can. The Obersturmbannführer tells the other guards to take the injured guard to the medical building, heads to Dannecker's office, orders Franke to open up and get out, and without much ado takes command of the camp himself. This is Hasso Reinhardt, and he's quickly authorized as the new commandant as the SS investigation of Dannecker's murder picks up speed.

I already mentioned the escape didn't go QUITE as the initial SS story of it insisted. It's actually worse. Nobody knows HOW Diamant and the others fled the camp, and the SS doesn't figure this out until the end of the war, when Reinhardt and Delbrück, his adjutant, discover a hidden passage system under the camp--there had been rumors of it, but nobody knew where it was, except Dannecker--and Gret. Turns out Dannecker had taken Gret down there one day, telling her the walls and door were so thick nobody would hear her scream, and he was right. By chance, Reinhardt and Delbrück discover the entry to the main passage not far from Dannecker's office, hidden behind a tapestry. So, how did the prisoners find out about the passage...? This is the most scandalous part of the story: Gret told them. She was in on it the whole time.

Schindel's suspicion was aroused at the sight of Gret's yellow-and-green attire that one day. Gret's always made a point of being immaculately dressed, almost always in matching colors--so for her to wear a yellow dress with green ribbons was odd. Schindel couldn't place what it reminded him of, but Diamant, whom the message was intended for, got it immediately: He and Gret had been making eye contact each time she arrived, and he'd even been able to pass along to her a ring he'd fashioned out of found scraps. When she showed up wearing the same colors as his identification badge, it signaled she was willing to communicate with him. From there, the two managed to plot to meet privately on camp grounds to make a plan for Diamant's escape; Gret was invited along. Diamant instructed her to find a way to get him in close contact with Dannecker; Gret came up with the idea to ask for a ring, knowing her stepfather could never refuse her a gift. Diamant told her to procure him a gun, preferably a revolver, and hide it near his workspace; he'd tell her the day and time to be at Dannecker's office to cover for him in case anyone heard the shot. The final day, while Dannecker was admiring the ring Diamant presented to him, Diamant brought out the gun Gret had left for him and played Russian roulette on Dannecker until it fired; Gret, out in the hallway, prevented the guard who came running from entering, claiming she'd accidentally fired Dannecker's gun and he'd sent her out before locking himself in--he was angry, best not disturb him. (The guard didn't even think twice before retreating.) She then entered herself, saw that Diamant had finished the job, but refused to go get the other prisoners waiting at a side entrance to the building and take them to the hidden passage until Diamant fetched her a trophy: her stepfather's Ehrendegen. The two were racing to get the other prisoners and let them inside when Schindel had spotted them. Gret was never a hostage at all, but a willing participant in her stepfather's murder, and she even got a souvenir out of the deal.

The SS don't find out about the secret passage until much later, though they do soon realize Gret Dannecker isn't the victim they thought she was. Quietly, they change out the posters describing her as such and replace them with wanted posters like those for Diamant and the other prisoners, with one additional detail: Execute on sight. Diamant, as horrible as his actions were, is just a Jew, and a criminal at that--he's expected to act like a criminal. Gret's actions, however--not only patricide, but betraying her race--are unforgivable.

Although this means the end of Dannecker, who, despite never beating or technically punishing Schindel, terrorized and demoralized him in every other way possible, Schindel is even more afraid now, not less. He agonizes over not following Diamant away from the camp, but the fear of what's on the outside, ironically, is worse than the fear of what's inside--the devil you know and all that. He's used to the routine of camp life, and the unknown terrifies him--yes, his main goal in staying alive is to reunite with his family, but he doesn't even know if they're still alive. And now there's a new commandant to deal with--and Schindel knows nothing about him. Commandant Reinhardt is big, imposing, with a frequent glare or scowl on his face; he seems quite displeased with the chaotic way Dannecker was running his camp. He vows, from day one, that there will be changes. Although he was gruff yet tolerable toward Schindel when he first arrived, Schindel dreads whatever might come next--change is never good, and he feels even more spite toward Diamant for triggering this situation. As the days pass and Reinhardt starts implementing his changes, however, Schindel's fear shifts into confusion. Supplies are brought in and the prisoners renovate their barracks; there's somewhat more food at their meals; and their jobs are gradually switched out. Previous labor had consisted of useless breaking of rocks, digging of holes, filling them in again--working for the sake of working oneself to death. These new jobs, some of them are about as strenuous, but they serve a purpose now, aiding in construction and the manufacture of goods; plus, smaller and more skilled jobs are added, and given to those who previously would have been sent to the firing squad. Far fewer prisoners are sent left at selections (eventually they're sent to other camps instead), and the crematorium stops running for weeks on end. Schindel is never ordered to beat anyone; when the other guards attempt to beat prisoners, Delbrück, now named Reinhardt's adjutant, puts a stop to it. Sure, there's still a swat or a cuffing here and there, but nothing like before. A few of the guards quit in protest, a few officials show up to complain, but the rest of the camp settles into its new routine.

Reinhardt has Schindel brought to his office. Dannecker's similar requests--especially the visit with Diamant--were never good news, so Schindel braces for the worst. He takes off his cap and stands before Reinhardt's desk with his head lowered, shaking a little. Reinhardt stands up--he's a lot taller than Schindel, and towers over him. First he asks Schindel's name again (a sort of running joke is he can never remember Schindel's name for a while)...then, oddly, starts asking him about how Dannecker formerly did things, since he's been told Schindel likely knew him best. He seems displeased by most of the answers, and mutters a few times, "Well, that's going to change." He finally says he'd like Schindel to help him out with various personal tasks. While true that Dannecker had had Schindel run a few personal errands for him, it wasn't a regular thing, and this really isn't the sort of thing a kapo is meant to do; Schindel is confused by the request. He doesn't ask questions, though, just ducks his head a bit lower and mumbles, "Ja, Herr Kommandant," when appropriate. Reinhardt comes around the desk to see him off, but does something extremely odd--he takes Schindel's cap from his hands and puts it back on his head before sending him out. The inmates NEVER keep their caps on when directly addressing the SS--it's a huge breach of camp "etiquette" and often rewarded with beatings. So Reinhardt's casual gesture is very strange, and Schindel doesn't know what to think of it.

Reinhardt does indeed assign various mundane tasks to Schindel; the way the camp is running now, his actions intimidating the other prisoners aren't needed quite as much, freeing him up to run errands in the administration building. He again frequently comes into contact with his old acquaintance Delbrück, who still shares cigarettes with him now and then, and then with new employee SS-Helfer Britta Azinger, who comes to the camp to work as secretary (Schindel is the one to first find out when she and Reinhardt get romantically involved). Just as with Dannecker, he's loyal to Reinhardt, but the loyalty gradually takes on a different form: He starts to think of Reinhardt as literally saving his life and grows fawningly devoted to him, trailing after him, hanging on his every request, eager for his every "Danke, Herr Schindel." Reinhardt treats him human--like a favored slave or servant, yes, but still human--and he's grown so unused to that that he gladly takes every bit of it that he can. It's by no means an egalitarian relationship, but Schindel was so badly broken by Dannecker that in comparison, he would follow Reinhardt to the ends of the earth.

This ends up happening, in a way, when the Allies storm the city and approach the camp. Reinhardt knows that no matter how he tried to improve the situation, he'll still most likely be executed as a war criminal; after sustaining a serious wound, he returns to the camp (many of the guards and other staff, including Delbrück and Azinger, have already fled), announces over the loudspeaker that he's turning off the fence and opening the gate, advises those who are well enough to leave the camp (also warning them of SS officers patrolling the city) while those who aren't will be attended to by the enemy soldiers when they arrive, then sits and waits. Schindel listens to the message over the loudspeakers, then stands aside and watches many of the prisoners mill around aimlessly for a moment, nonplussed--they can't quite believe what they just heard. They hear the ever-present hum of the fence stop, but have no way to test if it's actually off; yet then the metal gate under the ARBEIT MACHT FREI sign pops open. The first few prisoners gingerly approach--there are no guards left in the watchtowers or at the gate to shoot them--and peer out. Slowly step outside. Start walking away, then jogging, then sprinting. As soon as it becomes clear nobody, including Schindel, will stop them, more and more of them exit the camp, hurrying for cover. A handful stay behind, due to illness/injury or fear of the SS officers still in the city; Schindel is among them, though his reason for staying is different. He knows Reinhardt is still there, probably alone. He hurries inside to find him.

He at last locates the room containing the controls for the electricity supply; here Reinhardt is, slumped on the floor and bleeding. He's surprised by Schindel's arrival and wonders why he hasn't left; Schindel, while trying to tend to his wound, stammers that he isn't even sure if Rebekkah and his child are still alive or not. He's literally too afraid to leave, as he's gotten so used to being a prisoner and having his life laid out for him, he has no idea how to deal with the uncertainties of freedom. When Reinhardt passes out, Schindel stays by him, pressing his cap against the wound and trying not to cry. Soldiers in unfamiliar uniforms, speaking an unfamiliar language, arrive and point their guns at the two--Reinhardt wakes at the commotion--and start yelling; Schindel holds up his hands but can't understand a word they're saying, and he nearly panics. Reinhardt speaks their language, and Schindel starts picking up bits and pieces: These are Americans (the Germans had been expecting--and dreading--the approach of the Soviets, instead), and they want to know their names, ranks, and numbers. Reinhardt offers his information, but the Americans don't believe him or Schindel when they both insist Schindel is merely the kapo--they can't understand why a prisoner would stay behind to help an SS officer. Surely he's an SS member in disguise. Reinhardt does everything he can to vouch for him, including saying to Schindel, "Show them your arms, bitte," and the soldiers take note of Schindel's ID number, as well as his lack of a blood group tattoo. A soldier heads off to fetch the log of prisoner IDs that includes Schindel's information while the others decide to take both men into custody. Schindel tries to stay by Reinhardt as the soldiers unceremoniously drag him to his feet and haul him off--he manages to reach out and shove Schindel's bloodied cap back onto his head before his arms are seized--but shortly after, Schindel is forcibly separated from him and taken away for medical attention elsewhere. The soldier returns with the info that yes, "Isaak Schindel" is listed in the camp records as the Lagerälteste, and his ID number and photo match. They still can't figure out what he was doing with Reinhardt, but obviously he's not SS. They ignore most of his pleas for information on "Herr Kommandant" and make arrangements to question him for information and then figure out what to do with him as both a former prisoner yet also a collaborator. He does learn, eventually, that Reinhardt has been arrested and will stand trial after questioning--he'll almost certainly be hanged or shot. The Americans frown pensively when Schindel breaks down crying.

Everything after is a confusing whirlwind. Schindel provides what information he can under questioning, but it's limited, and the Allies are frustrated by his frequent pleas for updates on Reinhardt's situation. He tells them of Rebekkah, but doesn't know where she is or if she's alive; same with extended family, for all he knows they were sent to other camps to be killed. The Allies decide to keep him in protective custody for the time being. He learns after some time that Reinhardt also provided useful information--including how Diamant most likely escaped from the camp undetected, through the hidden passageway--and that a military tribunal indeed found him guilty, yet sentenced him to prison, rather than execution; Schindel is overwhelmed with relief. Then, more news: They've managed to locate Rebekkah, alive and well...with their young daughter, Hanna. Schindel puts his hands to his face--"I have a daughter"--and bursts into tears again. He's finally released from Allied custody--they decide not to bring charges against him--and he goes to see Rebekkah for the first time in years.

This is the moment he's been literally living for and dreading. Rebekkah has moved into a tiny house in a new, crowded neighborhood set up at the edge of the city. Schindel arrives and nervously knocks--she's been informed ahead of time to expect him, and answers, holding a little girl in her arms. Schindel can barely keep himself from crying again when he sees her; Rebekkah introduces Hanna to "Herr Isaak," then sets her down and tells her to give them a few moments alone. Husband and wife share a few halting, awkward comments, asking how each other is doing, what they've been up to, nothing too indepth. Schindel is overjoyed to see his Rebekkah again, but he immediately senses something is off; Rebekkah doesn't seem nearly as happy as he'd thought she'd be. When he finally asks if something is wrong, and why isn't she inviting him in, Rebekkah averts her eyes and murmurs, "I think...maybe it would be best if you found someplace else to stay." Schindel is stunned mute for a moment; Rebekkah haltingly explains. She's heard by now of what, exactly, Schindel's position was in the camp: a kapo, a collaborator with the Nazi guards. To the Jews, the kapos have become perhaps even more despised than the Nazis themselves, as sellouts and traitors to their own people--the very word kapo has become a terrible insult. Schindel isn't seen as a victim like the other camp inmates--he's seen as one of them. Schindel stammers in protest--he didn't WANT to do the things he did, he did it only to survive so he could come back to her, he was only following orders. Rebekkah winces and says, "That's exactly what THEY said." She adds that his presence there could endanger her and Hanna's lives, so he should find another place to go for now. Almost at a loss for words, Schindel asks if he can at least hug Hanna and tell her goodbye--he's never had the chance to even touch his own child. Rebekkah replies this would be too confusing and upsetting--she's already told Hanna her father died in the camps--and wishes Schindel farewell, retreating inside and closing the door. Schindel stands staring at the door for a moment before turning and silently leaving, his world collapsed, his heart broken. He fought so hard all those years to stay alive, all for nothing.

He holds on for a brief while, trying desperately to find a connection, any connection, to his former life. Nobody he once knew wants anything to do with him. It's like he's cursed, and his mere presence taints things; everyone avoids him. None of his old relatives, friends, acquaintances from the ghetto will take him in or give him work or even stop for a brief conversation. He has no one, but really, it's only Rebekkah and Hanna he wants--he could do without anything else. The fact that his wife and child are lost to him after all at last hits him like a truck and he sits alone in a park one evening sobbing his eyes out. He sees no point in continuing without them. He lifts his head and looks around, sniffling and rubbing his eyes; he has no drug, he has no gun, but there, leading out of the park and over a river, is a tall bridge. Schindel can't swim. The longer he stares at the bridge the more his resolve grows; seeing a way out of the pain, he finally gets up and heads toward it. By the time he reaches the middle of it he's as determined as ever, yet as soon as he finds himself on the other side of the guardrail, leaning over the river far below, that determination wavers. He stands there for a few moments to gather his courage, annoyed that it's fled him when he needs it most.

He's even more annoyed when he hears a voice--somebody is standing behind and below him on the formerly empty bridge.

Voice: (hesitant) "Hallo, mein Freund, what are you doing up there...?"

Schindel: "Go away."

Voice: "You'd like to talk...? Maybe?"

Schindel: "I said go away!"

Voice: "I can't do that, mein Freund, not while you're standing up there like that; think you can come down for a minute and talk...?"

Schindel: "I'm not your friend and I don't want to talk! Now leave me alone!"

Voice: "Not a nice thing to say to your friend. If you don't want to talk then maybe we could share a smoke instead, ja...?"

Confused, Schindel finally turns his head. The man standing below him is dressed in civilian clothes and Schindel doesn't recognize him; he removes his cap, however, and then realization dawns. It's Jan Delbrück, the SS guard--then adjutant--who used to share cigarettes with him, and vouched for him when Franke accused him of being involved in Dannecker's murder. "H...Herr Delbrück?" he says anyway, perplexed; Delbrück had disappeared shortly before the camp was liberated. "Lehmbruck," Delbrück says, confusing him further; then, "Bruno Lehmbruck, now," and it makes sense--he's obviously assumed a new identity while in hiding. He makes a few more efforts to coax Schindel down; Schindel can't help it, against his own wishes he starts stammering out why he's up there. He refuses to descend, however, until Delbrück changes tack, asking him to tell him about his wife and daughter instead; finally, reluctantly, he climbs back over the rail, freezing briefly so Delbrück has to climb up and help him back down. Delbrück leads him back to the park and sits him down, offering a cigarette before taking one for himself; they smoke together for a while, like old times, and Schindel tells him about Rebekkah and Hanna. It's a very long, slow process, but Delbrück convinces him it's worth holding on at least a little longer, to see what might happen; he points out how he's still alive, and despite the way the war ended, he managed to find someone who helped him through. Maybe Schindel will find this person, even if it isn't Rebekkah.

Schindel hates the thought that he may have to go on without Rebekkah--they've known and loved each other since childhood--but decides to try to find whatever other connection he can. There's one he knows of already; he visits an old castle which has recently been converted into a prison for war criminals. Here is where Hasso Reinhardt is being kept, following his trial; he's been sentenced to around ten years, after making himself useful providing information to the Allies. Reinhardt is glad to see him, yet saddened to learn of the situation with his wife; he offers advice similar to Delbrück's, as well as the thought that Schindel may try to make amends to those he feels he's wronged. Schindel mulls this over even as he manages to find a job in a print shop (his boss, learning he's been sleeping in the park, offers him a cot in the back room until he can get on his feet); he finally decides to go looking around the city.

On one street, a sort of "memorial" has been left: an old jeweler's shop whose windows were broken out and insides torched, the words "DER JUWELIER" crossed out and replaced with "DER JUDE." Also on the remaining portion of window is the name "J. DIAMANT." The Nazis left the gutted shop standing as a warning following Diamant's capture; after their defeat, the citizens leave it alone as well, though they put a fence around the front to keep out potential vandals. Schindel visits the shop next door; the proprietor, Jutta Bentz, confirms Diamant used to own the shop, and is still alive; word is he started a new shop in a mountain town. Schindel heads there, finds the shop. Within, he's surprised to meet Margarethe Dannecker; she recognizes him also, tells him, "I'm glad you're doing well, Herr Schindel," and retreats to fetch Diamant. Diamant is even more surprised than Schindel was, and seems uncomfortable as well, yet invites Schindel to join him for tea when Schindel has difficulty saying why he's there; Schindel declines but at last haltingly apologizes for the way he treated Diamant while he was kapo. As he speaks, Diamant looks more and more confused, and finally cuts in to say, "I'm not sure why you're apologizing to me, Herr Schindel; if anything I feel I should apologize to you." Schindel is perplexed to learn that Diamant feels just as guilty as he does, especially regarding the humiliating situation Dannecker forced them into, and doesn't even blame Schindel for beating him afterward. To hear the same issues he's agonizing over coming from his former foe's mouth puts things in a bit more perspective; Diamant says he owes him no apology, and Schindel departs, his heart feeling at least a little less heavy.

A week or so later, while Schindel is busy typesetting, his boss informs him he has a visitor, and to take his lunch to talk to them. He's stunned to find Rebekkah waiting for him. The two talk a little, awkward and shy, before she says, "I miss you," and invites him to stop by that evening for supper: "And...maybe you could stay, if you like." She doesn't mention that Diamant had visited, explained a little bit how difficult Schindel's position in the camp had been and he'd done it all for her--he doesn't blame Schindel for what he did, perhaps she should give him another chance. Of course Schindel agrees. He meets Hanna when he arrives, and has to force himself to hold back his tears, though when Rebekkah leaves the room for a moment, Hanna slips off her chair, trots over to Schindel, and hugs him; surprised but overwhelmed, he hugs her back. Rebekkah, coming back in the room, admits that she's since told Hanna the truth about who he is; she hopes they can start over. Schindel wipes the tears away from his eyes and murmurs, "I'd love nothing more."

[Isaak Schindel 2023 [‎Friday, ‎January ‎27, ‎2023, ‏‎5:00:16 AM]]

[Isaak Schindel 2023 2 [‎Friday, ‎January ‎27, ‎2023, ‏‎5:00:26 AM]]

[saturnwritings]

freeze your brain

—after a disheartening start to the evening leads you to hide under a table at a party, a chance encounter with kenma leads you to have one of the best nights of your life. | based on a pov by a cosplayer on tiktok (@/sea.kaninchen)

pairing(s): kenma x reader, past/brief daishou x reader 

word count: 3993

warnings: cheating, hints to sexual themes (only briefly)

a/n: i think i should mention that I DONT HATE DAISHOU!!! i think hes a complex and interesting character and ppl shit on him a lot but i did need a villain for this so im sorry for being basic he doesnt deserve this 😪also i was honestly really excited to do this?? like tiktok cosplayers’ povs are not bad i love cosplayers its just straight tiktok’s povs im sorry 😔 

9:32pm.

You let out a sigh as you glance at your phone for what seemed like the thousandth time that night, the numbers moving slow, in almost a mocking way. The blinding, multi-colored lights dancing around the room kind of made your eyes spin, and the air around you made you wonder if it was possible to describe air as ‘sticky’ and what… questionable ways it could get to that state. There were bodies moving all around the room, most likely all around the house, doing a multitude of things: dancing, talking, loitering.

You had been coerced by your friends, as well as your boyfriend, Daishou, to come to this party, with promises of letting loose and free food. As reluctant as you were, your boyfriend had assured you that he would personally make sure you had a good time; said boyfriend was nowhere to be seen.

As you leaned against the wall, you raised your phone screen to your face as you mindlessly scrolled through various social media feeds and such, trying to pass the time. Ultimately, there’s only so much you can do constantly refreshing pages. On top of that, it might have just been your imagination but people seemed to stop and sneak looks at you, probably wondering why you were staying by yourself in a corner for so long.

Putting your phone away, you decided to approach some of Daishou’s friends - after all, the least he could do was to hang out with you at the party he kind of forced you to go to. Taking a quick look around the room, your eyes landed on a group of boys hanging out on the couches, you recognized them as your boyfriend’s friends. You greeted them as best as you could over the loud music, almost pounding your eardrums.

“I was just wondering, have you seen Daishou anywhere?” As soon as you mentioned his name, that atmosphere within the group grew tense. They all seemed to avoid eye-contact and some even started fidgeting. Suddenly, one of the boys spoke up.

“I- uhm, I think I saw him go upstairs?” He was met with pointed looks from the rest. Confused, you thanked them nonetheless and located the stairs.

Maneuvering your way through the many bodies on the stairs, you start searching through the many rooms of the house as you think to yourself: Who’s house is this? Why are there so many rooms? You must’ve looked through the first 4 rooms of the hallway (bathroom, storage closet, bedroom, bedroom) before reaching another door.

When you opened the door, thankful it wasn’t locked, you immediately saw two figures in a bed in the middle of the room. Upon closer inspection, you saw that they were very much not having a nap together but instead moving in tandem. You were about to exit before they could see you when one of the figures, a girl, locked eyes with you. She immediately fumbled and pushed the other figure, a boy, off of her and drew the sheets to cover herself. Feeling awkward and frozen in place, you started to spew out apologies. 

“Oh my goodness, I’m so sorry, I, uhm,” you hands out in a defensive motion “I didn’t mean to walk in! I was just…” You trailed off when the boy turned around and you got a good look of his face. It was then when you had realized it was your boyfriend in a bed with his ex-girlfriend, Mika. 

“Suguru…” Your face morphed into a disheartened expression, “You’re…” you couldn’t finish your sentence though, your eyes frantically shifting between Daishou and Mika, who you had just realized the identity of, in confusion as you opened your mouth to say something, but the words lay stuck in your throat. Fat tears welled up in your eyes, eventually falling down your cheeks, but you had yet to move. 

“y/n! It’s not what you think!” Your boyfriend started as he moved off of the bed and towards you, fumbling for an explanation, but his lack of clothes told you everything. No matter what excuse he came up with, the intentions were clear. 

You choked up and you pushed him away. “Save it! We’re through!” Your voice wavered as you turned and ran out the door, covering your mouth with your hands in an attempt to stifle your crying. Unfortunately, you moved to hide in the bathroom to gather your thoughts, gripping the door handle and pushing when you realized it was locked. 

You looked around for something, you weren’t really quite sure what, but you knew you needed to be away from your boyfriend (ex-boyfriend, you reminded yourself) no matter what. In the heat of the moment, you stumbled your way downstairs and into the dining room. It was completely empty, which came as a surprise, but you realized it was probably because the living room was big enough for everyone to do what they wanted and the food was spread out in the kitchen and living room. 

You managed to take a second to catch a break. You were about to take your phone out to call an Uber when you heard Daishou calling your name. In a moment of panic, your eyes landed on the dining table in the middle of the room. Swiftly, and with less gravitas than you’d like to admit, you crawled under the table, thanking the lords above that it was covered in a table cloth that reached the floor. An interesting style choice? Sure, but you were thankful nonetheless.

Holding your breath, you heard your name being called before you heard footsteps leave the room. So there you were, crying under a table at a party. You could still hear the loud techno and pop music from the other room, albeit muffled, and let it drown out your sorrows. 

You thought of calling an Uber now, but you figured it would be smart to take the time to let your thoughts regroup so you at least stopped crying hysterically. 

***

“Please, Kenma?!” Kuroo pouted as he clasped his hands together, “C’mon, it’s not gonna be that bad, it’ll be really fun!” Kenma sighed. He looked down at his paused game of MonHun and took note of the time.

3:51pm.

It was nearing 4pm and Kenma still had yet to clear this level. “I already told you, I don’t wanna go,” Kenma started, “I don’t like parties.” That had Kuroo bouncing and flailing around.

“But Terushima always throws the best parties, they’re fun for everyone!” Kenma grunted in response, he had started playing his game again, Kuroo narrowed his eyes and pouted even harder. “Pleeease?! Everyone’s gonna be there, it’s gonna be great! But it won’t be fun without you,” Kuroo pleaded. Kenma scoffed at that, he considered agreeing just so shut Kuroo up, but he wanted to know what he was getting into first.

“Who’s gonna be there?” Kenma asked, not looking up from his PSP.

“Everyone!” Kenma thought it was almost comical how Kuroo immediately perked up. Kenma shot him an incredulous look. “Uhm, okay, so I know Bo’s gonna be there, which means Akaashi’s gonna be there… You can hang out with him!” Kenma hummed, only partially listening, “No, you’re right, you’re right! What was I thinking? Obviously Akaashi’s gonna hang out with Bokuto, which means I’m gonna have to third wheel!” He tuned Kuroo out as he went on.

Just as Kenma had lost another round, Kuroo seemed to have finished his rant about being a third-wheel and the dynamics between Bokuto and Akaashi.

“Um, well, I mean pretty much all of the Volleyball teams are gonna be there, Terushima really wants this to be epic! Uhm, other than that… Oh! Isn’t there that girl? I forgot her name but she’s dating… Daishou…” Kuroo shudders, Kenma hummed in response. “She’s in your class isn’t she? What’s her name, you can hang out with her!” 

“y/n.” Kenma offered, still not looking up from his game. 

“Yeah, that’s it! Ugh, she’s kinda strange… like, Daishou? Really? Last time I saw him, he was wearing that ugly sweater…” Kenma tuned him out once again. 

While Kenma continued his game, he subconsciously pondered on your relationship. You guys had never really been close, save for the occasional group and partner projects you guys did together, as was expected, you were in the same class after all. If Kenma was being honest, the only time he paid you any mind was when Kuroo brought up how Daishou was most definitely blackmailing you into dating him or something or the sort.

Fed up with Kuroo’s whining, Kenma spoke up after another round lost. “Kuro, I’ll go to the party,” Kuroo’s eyes widened as he gasped, sporting a surprised smile, Kenma continued, “But if I get bored or stressed, I’m leaving.” 

Kuroo nodded.

***

Needless to say, Kenma wasn’t having a good time. While he did enjoy seeing his friend, Hinata, again, the loud and, quite frankly, annoying music was starting to hurt his ears and the food provided was decent at best, meaning fast food pizza and about a million different bags of chips.

“Kenma! C’mon, get over here! We’re playing beer pong, I need a partner!” Kenma sighed as he heard Kuroo call out to him. From where he was leaning against a wall, he could see Kuroo, Bokuto and Miya Atsumu setting up red solo cups on a table. 

This had been happening all night, Kenma minding his own business, occasionally engaging in conversation with Hinata or Akaashi if they crossed paths, with Kuroo swooping in to try to get him to play some sort of party game with him. The first was Just Dance, which Kenma avoided by saying he was hungry, next came truth or dare, Kenma used the bathroom excuse on that one, and so on and so forth. The cycle continued, Kuroo hunting down Kenma and Kenma finding any way he could escape. 

That led Kenma to this moment: leaning against a wall in the kitchen playing on his PSP, with Kuroo struggling to maneuver around everyone to get to him. Kenma checks the digital clock on his PSP. 

9:46pm.

That seemed like a good time to leave, Kenma thought. As he was pocketing his PSP to get ready to make a dash for it, Kenma panicked for a moment, realizing that to get to the front door, he would have to pass by Kuroo and the beer pong table. Contemplating for a moment, he concluded that he would much rather wait it out and leave a bit later than have to explain why he was leaving. 

When Kenma came to his senses, he realized Kuroo was even closer to him than he thought. Scanning for options, he ran the only direction he could, through the arch connecting the kitchen with the dining room. 

In a moment of desperation, he ducked under the table cloth.

***

You checked yourself again in your phone camera. Thankfully, you had calmed down and stopped crying hysterically, and were only left with the occasional sniffle. Unfortunately, the redness was still very much present, as were the tears when you thought too hard about Daishou. Despite all the nasty things other people, especially in your school, would say about him, he was a kind person, passionate about many things and was very caring towards you: always cheering you up and lending an ear when you needed to vent. 

I guess he just… really liked Mika, then, huh, you thought to yourself as you hugged your knees close to your chest.

Deep in your thoughts, you hadn’t noticed the frantic footsteps making their way towards you. You only realized something was off when the table cloth rustled and was lifted open, only for someone to slip in and under the table with you.

The boy seemed to be catching his breath when you made a startled noise of surprise. Hearing it, the boy snapped his head up to meet your stare. You were both just staring at each other with wide eyes, after a moment you both started fumbling out uhms and i’s, glancing around to avoid eye contact. 

After accidentally looking up at each other at the same time, you realized who the boy was.

“Wait… Kenma?” He blinked.

“y/n?” He responded with a tilt of his head, “Uhm, I’m sorry, I was just… trying to get away from someone…” You shifted in your spot, casting your eyes away in embarrassment hoping he wouldn’t see your red face and stray tears. “What about you?”

“Hm?” Your eyes widened in confusion.

“Why are you, uh,” he paused awkwardly and gestured around vaguely, “What’re you doing under a table?” You didn’t really know how to respond to that.

“Uhm… well,” you felt tears welling up in your eyes again, “I-” a sob wracked through your body. Completely overwhelmed with emotions, you burst into tears. Kenma’s eyes shifted frantically before he regained his composure, he had never really been good and expressing emotions or helping others with theirs.

Kenma thought to himself: What would Kuro do in this situation? Sure, Kenma had gotten upset lots of times, and Kuroo always knew how to help. He realized that one thing that Kuroo did was ask him if he wanted to talk about what was going on - of course, Kenma never did, but for some strange, unknown reason, it made him feel just the tiniest bit better. In the back of his mind, Kenma thought that it made him feel better because it told him there was someone who cared about him.

“Do you, uh, wanna talk about it? Maybe?” He winced at his awkward delivery, his hands fidgeting.

“Is that,” you sniffled, “is that okay?” Kenma tried his best to give a reassuring smile, he was sure it came off as strained.

“Yeah, sure.”

You told Kenma about your relationship with Daishou; how it started, all the ups and downs, and finally how it ended. How you kept having chance encounters: at school when you were out shopping and even late one night at a public library - that was the night he asked you out for the first time, and you couldn’t have been more smitten. 

During your relationship, he was so kind and considerate to you, and he never failed to make you laugh. You told Kenma how he even said that despite going to different schools, there was no one else he'd rather be that: that apparently didn’t stop him from hooking up with another girl.

After you went silent, Kenma found that you were finished. Despite only thinking of you as ‘that other girl in his class that was dating a volleyball player Kuroo hated’ until recently, seeing you cry and pour your heart out gave him a strange, internal attachment to you.

“Do you wanna get out of here?” Kenma asked suddenly, turning to you and planting a hand on the floor, learning towards you ever so slightly. You blinked.

“What?” Surprised by his own outburst, Kenma decided to roll with it.

“There’s an arcade a few blocks down… sometimes when I get upset, I go there and it always cheers me up?” To be perfectly honest, Kenma wasn’t really expecting you to say yes. He expected you to brush him off, say you were feeling better and ready to go home. 

Kenma himself didn’t know why he asked, he usually didn’t really like spended excess time with people he didn’t know that well, but subconsciously, there was a part of him that wanted to help.

“Oh, uhm, yeah! Sure, why not?” You metally cursed yourself for your stuttering, it was bad enough you were info-dumping and completely oversharing, you didn’t want Kenma to think you were that weak. You sniffled again, realization dawning on you.

“We gotta find a way out of here first, thought.” You said. Kenma cringed. 

***

Long story short, you and Kenma managed to escape the table without anyone seeing you. You were extremely thankful, as it would have been very awkward if someone saw the two of you crawling out from under a table. 

Getting outside was another thing, thought. Kuroo and the beer pong table were still very much blocking the way out, and there was always the risk of bumping into Daishou again. After a bit of asking around, you found out that there was a backdoor in the kitchen, so you and Kenma were able to make your escape. 

Now you were playing away to your hearts’ content to some random racing game at an arcade. You both were playing side-by-side, versing each other. To no one’s surprise, Kenma was beating you. Deep down, though, Kenma was a little impressed you were able to keep up with him so well, being a religious player of Mario Kart himself and all. 

You both fleeted from game to game, playing almost every game available from shooting games to claw machines to even a Space Invaders-esque game. You had managed to earn a good amount of tickets, all thanks to Kenma’s membership card and the loose tokens he found in his wallet.

Eventually, you had played until the arcade was empty and one of the employees came up to you to tell you they were closed. They did mention that you could still buy some prizes if you wanted to, to which Kenma turned to you.

“Do you want to?” 

Over the time you had spent playing games together, you had gotten to know Kenma better than just ‘the quiet boy in your class’ in between passing conversations and empty, teasing threats, some of your favorites had been: I will steal your kneecaps and If you play with that character you don’t deserve rights.

“Yeah, sure!” You replied, a genuine smile crossed your face. 

In the end, you had gotten a keychain with a mini funko character on it and Kenma settled on a cute sticker that, with much encouragement from you, he stuck on the case of his PSP.

After exiting the arcade, Kenma took a moment to glance over at you. The empty street illuminated by semi-faulty lampposts, and he found it showed your face more clearly than all the neon lights of the arcade. Your tears dried up, although there were still hints of red in splotches on your face. 

As he watched you talk excitedly about your new keychain, he couldn’t help but feel a strange way, an unfamiliar feeling he had never felt before. It was warm in a way, something akin to stepping home for the first time after being away for so long. It was weird, in all the years he had known you, or been partnered up with you for whatever, he had never thought of you as anything other than a random classmate. However, after everything you had both gone through together that night, something new was forming.

Little did Kenma know, you were thinking the same. You noticed the little things about him; you thought back to how his nose would scrunch when he would mess up in a game or you would surpass him in something, or how his eyes lit up and almost sparkled ever so slightly when he was picking out stickers. Now that you were outside, you could see how his dyed hair swayed gently in the crisp November wind, or how his eyes would somewhat crinkle as he laughed when you made a joke.

After a few moments of silence, you spoke up. 

“Hey, so, I didn’t really get to eat at the party… Do you maybe wanna get something to eat nearby?” You asked, turning your head to Kenma. Realizing how that sounded like you were asking him on a date, you quickly stuttered out “Of course, you don’t have to! We can just get a small snack or, or maybe we don’t have to get anything!” You laughed awkwardly as Kenma showed no obvious emotions, however his eyes were slightly widened and his cheeks growing more red, but you chalked that up to the colder weather and surprise. 

Kenma suddenly remembered how he didn’t get a chance to eat as well, but in all the games you guys were playing, he didn’t get a chance to feel hungry. Realizing he had not responded, he quickly thought of a place to get food, his mind immediately wandering to 7/11.

“Oh yeah, sure. There’s a 7/11 down the street, if you want?” He said, and you were off.

***

Sitting in the 7/11 with Kenma under the fluorescent lights was oddly comforting. You were happily eating your warm soba noodles (topped with tempura) as Kenma ate his apple pastry (having already eaten half of an egg salad sandwich and wrapping the rest for later) as you engaged in mindless conversation, Kenma periodically pulling out his PSP to either play or check on things. 

During some random conversation about a new game Kenma was playing, you noticed him occasionally glancing behind you. Eventually, you looked behind you to see what looked like a newly installed slushie machine, touchscreen and all. Realizing Kenma wouldn’t speak up about it, you decided to take charge.

“Do you wanna get slushies?” You said with a grin. Kenma looked surprised for a second before lightly laughing.

“Sure.”

Over the machine, you tapped the screen to get a strawberry lemonade slushie, while Kenma opted for cherry one.

Slushies didn’t exactly pair well with warm soba, but tonight was apparently a night full of surprise, what with finding out about your boyfriend (ex, you reminded yourself), not to mention these spontaneous adventures with a random boy who was, you thought, not so random anymore.

“Wanna have a competition?” Kenma’s voice interrupted your train of thought, “Let’s see who can drink theirs the fastest.” You grinned.

“You’re on!”

After Kenma counted down, you both tried to down your slushie. Halfway through, though, you had to stop.

“Ah! Brainfreeze!” You exclaimed, clutching your head with one hand. Kenma also stopped drinking and laughed, “My head feels so numb, argh!” You hummed. “At least now I won’t think of Daishou anymore… My brain feels like it’s pounding like, like it’s having a rave or something!” It was getting late, meaning you were dangerously close to your stage of drowsiness that caused you to infodump like crazy. Kenma’s smile dropped every so slightly. 

“Hey, uhm,” he looked as though he was looking for the right words to say, “I’m really sorry about what happened, uh,” he scratched the back of his head nervously, “Sorry, I’m not great at… feelings… but, if you ever need someone to talk to, I’m here.” 

You blinked for a second before smiling. 

“Thanks, Kenma.”

As you were finishing up the rest of your slushie, you turned to Kenma.

“Hey, uhm, I know this is pretty random but do you want to be my partner for the project we’re doing in science?” Kenma looked up from his PSP and stared at you, as if trying to remember what you were talking about, “The one about incomplete dominance and sex-linked traits? The teacher said you had to find a partner of the opposite gender so you could create a ‘hypothetical baby’, which, honestly, I find kinda dumb… Like, if the baby’s just hypothetical, then you could partner up with anyone, right? It’s not just me that feels that way?” 

Kenma remembered what project you were talking about, but he really enjoyed when you would continue on these rants. Being one to not talk that much, he liked how you were able to fill in the silence, although the times when you would be eating and he would be playing in silence were not as awkward as he thought, they weren’t awkward at all. 

“So… Do you want to pair up?” Kenma flushed, realizing he was mindlessly listening to you talk.

“Oh, uhm, yeah, sure.” You beamed.

bonus: you did your project on incomplete dominance and sex-linked traits and learned about the wonders of co-dominance in blood types. also kuroo was very worried about kenma leaving and thought he got kidnapped by a van that said ‘free games’ but it was all cool when he learnt kenma left with a girl ;)

[justagirlwhowasbored]

Oh, May I request of Stolas x wife! Reader? What if Stolas got a wife who loves him for who he is? Since they were kids they got each other’s backs. They both remained loyal to one another and other demon royal families are very jealous of their perfect loving family. Stolas deserves a better companion who supports him and cherishes him.

YESS!!! Tbh season 2 had my crying I felt so bad for stolas. And thank you for giving my a request. Plus I agree stolas 100% should have a wife who love Him.

————————

I won’t be including anything with blitzø just bc I don’t love writing with that topic.

INBOX IS VERY OPEN AND VERY DRY AND VERY MUCH ADKING FOR REQUESTS

when you and stolas got setup for a marriage it was bad news

Well for you at least you didn’t want to get married but your father wanted you to so you did

When stolas saw your provided photo he fell head over heels for you

The first time you went to meet him was at his palace and he spent the entire time showing you his things and then he went to the yard to play with you

And if child you couldn’t just love that precious little nerd then shame on you

After a few visits you started to warm up to him and appreciation for his nerdy-ness

After years of being friends and a lot of blushing o_o

The marriage was there

Happiness all over the place

Holding his hand and looking into those big adorable red eyes

“I do” left his and your lips 👄

The sweet moment would be one that the two of you

With Octavia and him you were the happiest in hell

All the sweet little moments like cuddles

Picnics going to the fanciest place in all of hell

The cuddles while he towers over you were the sweetest

Thanks for the request please I need some more I’m out of ideas

[jade-parcels]

What if mc went into labour?? O_O

Panik! /(O_O)\

Going into labor

With Xiao, Diluc, Baizhu and Childe

(Same guys as this post)

—————————

Xiao:

He’s freaking out more than you are

He’s been around a long time but he hasn’t exactly…watched a birth. Or been by someone’s side for a birth. It sounds horrific, it’s bloody, theres a lot of gore and crying…It’s easy to say it’s not exactly his scene

Xiao loves you and his unborn baby so much!! But he has dreaded the birth since day one. He’s scared for you, he doesn’t like seeing you with a papercut!! Now you’re going to push out a baby??

Xiao knows he can’t deliver this baby so he took you into Liyue Harbor a month before you were due just to be safe! There’s doctors there!!

He wears a calm, collected mask as you hold his hand for support but he’s sweating…sweat is literally trickling down his face as he murmurs encouragements to you, trying to avoid making eye contact with the doctor because that’s just another level of stress on his shoulders

Every time you flinch, cry out or sob, he’s there. Xiao will even get in the bed with you if you want him to, you have him wrapped around your finger “You are so brave…I am…I am so proud of you” he tells you, trembling right beside you “Just a few more pushes, okay? You’ve got this” he counts with you, breathes with you, holds you, he’s there to support YOU and be whatever you need him to be!

Once the baby is presented to you, he steps away, not wanting to hold the baby right away. He’s still shaking and his arms feel like noodles, his heart is absolutely pounding…But he feels relieved. You’re safe and the baby is healthy. He’ll kneel beside you and the baby to say a prayer of thanks to Rex Lapis for keeping his family safe :’)

Diluc:

You’re about to have the most lavish birth a person could have

Midwives, maids, candles, warm or cool cloths for your face, imported extra strength painkillers, the whole nine yards

Diluc is not messing around, he wants this to be a smooth, painless (well, as painless as it can be) experience for you. He has interviewed your midwives and staff personally and background checked every one of them

He has planned it all out with you but when the time comes, he freezes up and panics. Never in a million years would he have predicted this! He’s always been so collected in stressful situations but how can one be calm right now??

Labor takes hours and the entire time he’s stressing. The midwife will probably have to step in and send him away for go get some air cause oh my gosh, he’s stressing everyone out with his nervous Nelly behavior!!!

When he comes back and it’s time to push, he’ll help you into whatever position you want. Standing, sitting, laying down you name it, he’s there to help you in any way he can

And once the baby is in your arms…He’s a a sniffling mess! You’ve never seen him cry this way, sniffling and hiccuping with a huge grin on his face “I-I just can’t believe it” he’ll choke out “I love you so much- thank you- thank you for everything”

He’ll be shaking from leftover stress all night, constantly checking in on you and the baby. Diluc may be a bit overbearing but cut him some slack…he’s a new dad with loss/abandonment issues 0-0

Baizhu:

He is READY!!!!

You two have has a written birth plan for months now so he follows it exactly. He assists you to your shared bedroom, gets you changed out of your clothes and into a baggy nightgown for comfort. He makes you lay down so he can get all of the equipment he needs

He’ll send Qiqi away, telling her to go to Gui’s house to get him just in case he needs an extra set of hands amidst the general chaos of birth

You still have hours to go before the baby is actually born but time flies when you have someone so kind and attentive by your side. His presence is calming and he uses his vision to grant some healing to you which in this case is just pain relief

Baizhu alternates between laying with you and getting you up to walk around to get labor started

Gui will arrive and hours later, hours of sweating, pushing, crying, promises of “you’re almost there honey, just a few more minutes”…Now your baby is here

Baizhu is quick to cut the cord and wash off your bundle of joy, bringing them over to set on your chest

Now that he’s no longer in doctor mode…he’s quite speechless :’) he’s just overcome with joy. He basks in this moment and thanks the archons that he was able to be here for this :’)

Childe:

Ajax took time away from work to be present for your birth!! He took you to his family home! You’ll be supported by his loving mother and older sisters. They’ll all be present to make sure everything goes smoothly

Ajax is overjoyed! He’s so excited to meet his baby :’) he is right there to hype you up! Whenever you feel scared or nervous, he’s right there with his optimism and sweet encouragement “Sweetheart, you’ve fought a ruin hunter with a dull blade and a bucket! This will be easy as pie, I promise you”

He’ll make you do squats and walk up and down the hallway so gravity will pull the baby down so you won’t have to push as much or as hard

Ajax isnt even nervous himself. Sure, in the back of his mind he knows there’s plenty of risks but he just doesn’t believe anything bad will happen. You’re so strong, he has his family here to help, he’s here to support you the entire way!!! He’s ready to meet his baby!!

Your birth is a noisy one, youve got like 5 people in the room with you telling you to push, relax, ‘it’ll be okay’, breathe!! Ajax is right there to hold your hand and brush your hair off your sweaty face

When he sees the baby for the first time he dissolves into a sobbing mess lmao it is not pretty. He wraps his arms around you as you hold the baby, crying into your shoulder, thanking you for being so strong, so beautiful

He’s said it one hundred times but he tells you again that he’d do anything to protect his family. He’s so grateful to you for bringing your baby into the world :’)