#no tag-rambling this time since I'm so incredibly tired

[cerise-on-top]

Taking Care of a Drunk Valeria and Laswell

Somehow, Tumblr botched this upon me having posted it, so I'm posting it again. I'm genuinely sorry about this, I really don't know why it happened!

Valeria: Valeria isn’t exactly a lightweight, but she certainly can’t outdrink everyone either, meaning it’s not too hard to find her drunk when she’s out with you. While she can normally drink quite a bit, if it’s good and expensive wine she’s drinking, she’s a goner fairly quickly. Despite normally already having quite the temperament, she gets fairly aggressive when drunk, picking fights with just about anyone who looks at her the wrong way. Most people don’t expect someone so pretty and cute to get this mad when drunk, much less expecting them to be able to suplex them into the ground as well. It becomes evident quickly enough that she’s had enough, with someone, pretty much always you, needing to drag her away from the bar and the booze lest she actually just kills someone. It wouldn’t be her first time, but you were hoping last time won’t be repeated like that. And thus, you put your hand on her shoulder, telling her that it’s finally time to go home.

“Don’t fucking touch me, pendejo, I’m married!”

“I know, I am your wife!”

Upon hearing that, she’d be quiet for a moment, and that’s about the best chance you have to drag her away. It’s sweet that she’s that loyal to you, especially when she’s as drunk as she is, but she really needed to stop. Putting her in the car, you drove as you had had much less alcohol than she did, but Valeria, having “regained” her composure, wouldn’t shut up, questioning you about things only her wife would know. Naturally, you knew the answers to all of her questions. Why wouldn’t you know about her love for the stuffie you gave her all those years ago? Again, she’s stunned a bit, but won’t shut up either, starting to flirt with you instead. If you can speak Spanish, congratulations, you’ll hear the worst pickup lines in existence that aren’t standard. Most of them won’t even make sense since she comes up with them herself and she isn’t exactly the most creative person. If you don’t speak Spanish and tell her such, she’ll try to speak English with you, but fails horribly and either speaks Spanglish, or simply reverts back to her native tongue. Her accent, too, becomes very thick when she’s drunk.

Once you’re out of the car and back home she’ll be more inclined to touch you. Putting her arms over your shoulders, trapping you between her and the wall while stumbling over both her feet and her words, looking for the worst excuses to simply touch your hand. If you wear your ring, then you can be certain she’ll be looking for and at it. Still can’t believe she’s your wife.

If you wanna take care of her, now’s your chance. You can put her head in your lap without her protesting, but she will have to leave fairly often for the bathroom, so the joy isn’t very long lived. But she will always come back to you and demand you run your fingers through her hair. Actually thinks she’s 0.5% weaker than she actually is while drunk, giving her enough of an opportunity to want to be spoiled rotten by you. Give her the princess treatment and she’ll return it tenfold. And yes, she will remember, she’s never forgotten anything just because she was drunk at the time. Draw her a bath and help with washing her. If you gently rub in the shampoo she’ll go very quiet, simply wanting to enjoy your presence. While she does want to tease you still, it’s not nearly as mean and venomous as it usually is. Her words are slurred, so there’s a chance you can’t understand everything anyway. I know they say “in vino veritas”, but I think she also gets a bit more cuddly. Not particularly emotional still, just slightly more mad than she usually is, but definitely more cuddly. Yes, she hates PDA, yes, she wants to hold you close so you won’t run away from her anymore.

While she will lay down for a few hours, she won’t be able to sleep all that well after drinking a lot of alcohol, so if you’re down for an all nighter, she’ll appreciate it once she’s sobered up enough after those few hours. Doesn’t need to be taken care of in the sense that you need to hold her hair back while she throws up, she rarely ever does after an intense night, but if you make her some toast she’ll definitely show her appreciation. Get her some aspirin while you’re at it too. Valeria might not be the most traditionally affectionate person normally, but she’d fight tooth and nail for you if you ever got drunk like she did.

Laswell: Laswell isn’t a lightweight in the slightest, she can hold her liquor quite well due to larger alcohol consumption when she was a lot younger. While she still wouldn’t be able to outdrink someone like Nikolai, it takes quite a bit to get her drunk. She’s a classy woman as well, but she does like stronger things such as tequila or some cocktails. Not one for too much vodka, but not above drinking the good and expensive kind upon being offered. As mentioned, she can take quite a lot, but she only really drinks the strong stuff, so it doesn’t take too long for her to properly get drunk either if she’s had a few too many drinks. Most of the time you couldn’t even tell she was drunk in the first place since she acts just about the same. Aside from her breath, it’s hard for just about anyone to tell she’s drunk, so if she ever wears a mask, no one would know she even drank anything in the first place. Yes, her judgment is just a bit clouded, but she can still make some good decisions. However, she loosens up a bit more while drunk. It’s not too often she tells jokes while sober, but you’ll hear one pretty much every other hour when she’s not. Laughs at them a bit too, she thinks she’s a comedic genius. Her jokes are just what you’d expect from someone of her age. They don’t always make sense, but she likes them. A guy walks around the corner and the bus is gone. The bus drives around the corner and the guy is gone. Both round the corner and the corner is gone. It’s a real knee slapper to her and she’ll laugh every time. Don’t ask me what it means, though, I couldn’t tell you.

While usually not a very touchy person either, she’ll keep her hands on you just the tiniest bit more. A hand on your thigh, a hand on your shoulder, a hand on your arm. She’s not touch starved, but getting to feel you, getting the reassurance that you’re there, it’s a good feeling to her. Unlike Valeria, Laswell is usually the first one to suggest you leave when she’s had a few drinks, but when she’s with Price and Nikolai and having a very good time, she might forget about her drunken state and needs to be reminded of how she’s going to get home. And thus you tug at her arm.

“I am a happily married woman, stop trying to get my attention.”

“Kate, my love, I’m your wife, please let’s just go home.”

It’s the first time something like this has ever happened, but you couldn’t help but chuckle a little bit. She’s so cute when she’s drunk. It takes a bit more convincing to get to her, but eventually she’ll remember you and agree to go home with you, begrudgingly. Saying her goodbyes to Nikolai and Price, she’ll trot alongside you, her hand in yours. I know, she’s not a fan of PDA either, but there’s nothing wrong with holding hands while it’s pitch black outside. Most of your time driving back home is spent just chatting over this and that. How nice it was to see her old friends again, how she hoped you and them would get along as well, that sort of stuff. As well as thanking you for taking one for the team and driving home.

Once home, the first thing she always does is ask you for a glass of water. She’s thirsty, alcohol doesn’t hydrate as much as it dehydrates. But other than that she’s really just content playing UNO or Sorry! with you. Despite her being very drunk, she can keep her cool, she’s just very low maintenance in that regard. In fact, you could leave her as she is and she’ll be just fine. However, that doesn’t mean that she doesn’t want your company. When it’s very late and you’re both still up, Kate opens up a lot more about herself than she usually does, regardless of whether you’re having an impromptu therapy session among yourselves or you're wiping the dishes. Those are things she genuinely doesn’t tell anyone aside from the people closest to her, the things that, from time to time, do weigh on her. She knows she can’t particularly tell you everything she does at work, but nothing prevents her from telling you personal anecdotes she thought she’d take with her to her grave. You don’t need to always respond to her, simply listening is more than enough. Usually, she remembers your late night deep talks, but sometimes she does forget about a topic or two you talked about. But she’ll always remember you giving her the time of your day to listen to her. And for that she’s truly grateful.

[cryptidcorners]

Gardenia - Josh Futturman x M!Reader

Description: Being Josh's childhood friend, you never would have expected to see him appear by your doorstep after a month of radio silence. Though, in this particular visit, he's desperate to air out his true feelings before traveling through time. Unknowing if he'll ever come back to see you again.

Media: Future Man!Show

Character: Josh Futturman

Tags: Friends to Lovers, Established Relationship, Childhood Friends, Catching Up, Confessions, Light Angst to Fluff, Kissing, Romantic, Comfort, Sweet Stuff

Warnings: Arguing (+ about Josh ghosting reader), Foul Language, Mental Breakdown/Depression Mentions

read my TOS + Josh Futturman Masterlist

Dread twisted in your stomach like rusted wire, and your constant stirring on your mattress was robbing you of any justice of getting any variant of rest. Your eyes grew heavy, dangerously puffy from expelling your grief several dark hours ago. Though, it had only felt like seconds to you. Your thoughts raced like a wild flock of puzzled birds, breath hitching along with it as you slowly fell into decay.

Your gaze was fixed to your glowing digital screen, eyes fixed on your messages with your old friend, Josh Futturman. It had been weeks of endless radio silence, along with your desperate texts. You were more worried than upset if anything. You went to his house to drop off a game you had finished, but his parents said he wasn't there. Along with all the other days you had made excuses to stand at his doorstep.

His parents weren't liars, and they wouldn't deny you. They knew Josh and you were close. You even remembered Diane saying you were helping him in ways they had struggled to for years. Your lip quivered, so why would he leave?

You two only argued once during a blue moon, you shared so much in common and you swore every second was sincere with him. It had always been him, and it had always been you. Ever since you were kids you were inseparable, to the point others figured you were his boyfriend due to how close you were. It was ridiculous.

Yet, here you were, hunched over and dry with internal pain, thoughts still clinging onto the thought of Josh. You were starved to see him again. He understood everything about you, even with the design of your mind being incredibly complicated. Had you done something wrong? Had you offended him? Had he grown tired of you? Did he even like you?

Then, you heard your doorbell. The familiar tune caught you off guard, but it had made you fix up your wrecked expression promptly and sluggishly fix your clothes. You raced downstairs while catching your breath. You were too out of it to care who it was, but you weren't stupid enough to open it at random. You rested your forehead against the door, "Who is it?" you asked weakly.

"Josh," a familiar voice answered. Muffled, and seemingly distressed as well. You jolted up and needily worked your hands to unlock the door. Your face was brimmed with shock. It was him, but covered in bruises and sweat. His curls were lazy and messy, his eyes were wide and his chest was rising and falling rapidly. Still, his gentle tone made you weak, relieved. But also incredibly angry. "Hey." He said, "Long time no see?"

You struggled to collect your thoughts. "Yeah." Your eyes narrowed, "Do you want to come inside?"

"Please." Josh stated. You didn't say anything, and gestured for him to walk toward. As soon as you shut the door, he immediately opened his mouth and began rambling, "Look, I'm—, I'm so sorry I didn't talk to you." His eyes met yours, "Trust me, I didn't mean to leave you for so long." Josh stammered, "I was just, so wrapped up in something. And, I wanted to talk to you, but I couldn't, please, I didn't–"

You sucked your teeth, "Where were you Josh?"

"I–" his hands landed heavily at his sides, his face slightly appalled at himself. As if he were a dumbfounded audience. "I can't tell you."

"Why not?" You grew agitated, spilling out your gallons of binded frustration. "Why did you ghost me for over a month? Where . . . Where were you?" You breathed heavily, "I thought you hated me, or something terrible happened to you. God, your parents didn't even know where you were!"

Josh choked out a cry, "You don't understand. I didn't want to hurt you,"

"But you did!" You interrupted. "Josh, why did you leave? What happened?"

"I can't fucking tell you!" Josh shouted. "You wouldn't understand. It's too complicated!" You grabbed him by the shoulder before he could turn around, "No, I don't think you understand. How could you just go with no explanation? You look terrible. What are you running away from?"

"I'm sorry, I can't tell you." Josh winced, "I'm sorry, okay? Please, I had no choice. I didn't mean to leave you. I didn't do it because I hated you or anything like that, okay?" His breaths were unraveling, "Do you know how much I care about you? You know me. You're my best friend," a low whimper escaped your lips as you stated at him. The tension shifted, and you both gazed at each other longingly. "I love you."

"Josh." You released your grip. "Please, I, don't have much time. I love you, so much. I would never, ever, hurt you." His hands found your face, "I need you to know this." Something grew in your chest, and you brought your head forward. "I love you too."

You don't know who fell first, but you felt relieved once Josh kissed you. His hands scavenged across your back, and you dug your fingers into his hair. He hummed, body relaxing at the feel of you. Once his palm found its way under your shirt, you both collapsed onto your couch.

You were both crosslegged and smothered in each other, skin blazing as your love untangled. His hands found your sides and you were eagerly grabbing his collar to pull him closer. You swear you could see stars once he pulled away, trying to catch his breath. Josh held you close, face still red from the passion you had inflicted just a few seconds ago.

"Hey, I'm sorry." You whispered.

"For what?"

"For getting so angry." You frowned, "I shouldn't have gotten so pissed at something personal happening to you."

Josh cupped your face. You swore you could drown in his eyes, "Don't say that. You deserve to be mad at me, I left you. And it's okay, just . . . stay here with me." You cuddled up next to him with a sleepy exhale, smiling softly. "Stay."

Josh whispered, "I promise I'll make it up to you. In any way I can,"

[tsukimefuku]

Tea and coffee

You had a sleepless night and needs some caffeine to keep yourself from falling asleep before the day has even begun, so Nanami and Hiromi lend a helping hand.

tags: Jujutsu Kaisen, f!reader, established relationship Higuruma x OC/Reader, implied past Nanami x OC/Reader, angst, second hand embarrassment, some fluff, barely proofread.

wc: 1.7K

This is part of my "Jujutsu Partners Canon Divergence AU". A sequence of short stories and random drabbles related to Nanami x Reader x Higuruma. To see the ever-growing list of one-shots and short stories, please visit my masterlist :) 

Disclaimer: these stories are NOT written and posted in chronological order of events. To see where this story fits in the timeline, please check the masterlist mentioned above.

"Today is going to be gruesome" you complained, sat outside Jujutsu High's HQ buildings, just behind the main one where most of the sorcerers usually stopped by before or after missions, dreading the next hours of work you'd have to endure while sleep-deprived. You had been up most of the night, finding it hard to sleep for no particular reason, and sighed at the thought that your bed would still be hours away from you, having to teach two classes — the first year's and second year's, respectively — in between. Gojo Satoru, I hate you for talking me into coming to Jujutsu High, you thought to yourself.

"Hey, beautiful" you heard a familiar voice coming from behind you. You turned your head and saw Hiromi, whose smile became a slightly concerned frown as he saw your face. "Oh, you don't look so good. Are you okay?"

"Not so much. I couldn't sleep at all last night, and now I'm supposed to teach those teens in just an hour. Ugh, I can barely think" you sighed. "And I'm surprised to see you here this early. Did you just come back from a mission?"

"About to go on one, actually" he replied, rubbing your shoulder softly. "Can I get you anything? Maybe a hot cup of water for your tea?"

You pondered for a moment. "I'd appreciate that, thank you."

He nodded and walked away, as you sighed deeply to yourself and rested your face on the table.

Your mind was drifting, and your eyes began to shut as you were dozing off. However, you heard some footsteps behind you, and lifted yourself up. "Hiromi, you were incredibly fast, how did you heat that wat-"

It was Nanami.

"Oh, h-hi" you said, instantly jolted awake. 

You both hadn't spoken to each other properly ever since you both went on your last joint mission to exorcize the Lover's Pass curse. On that occasion, he apologized for pulling away so suddenly after you both shared a night together, but you couldn't find it in yourself to trust him with your feelings again, even if you still had some for him.

More specifically, given you hadn't exchanged a word since then, you never got to tell him that after the debacle, you and Hiromi began dating — but would you, in any case? After all, you had only told Shoko about it.

The air instantly filled with awkwardness, as he nodded towards you in a silent greeting. He had the newspaper under one arm, and held a cup of coffee with the other.

Upon further inspection, Nanami noticed you looked very tired with deep bags under your eyes, but it took him a minute to decide if he'd actually ask you about it. You were both feeling very self-conscious, as he imagined you had no idea he knew you were dating someone else, thanks to Shoko.

"You don't seem to be very well." 

You grunted. "You're the second person to say that today. I know I look like hell right now, but c'mon, it can't be that bad!"

Nanami didn't even realize a tiny smile had formed on his face, and he stood there for a while as you mumbled about having a hard time sleeping the night prior, how you still had to teach two classes today, and that you dreaded being sent on a mission or having to grind work with Shoko before finally being let out your chains to go home and sleep.

As your rambling was over, you both stayed silent for some time, being yet again engulfed in discomfort. It was then that you remembered he had the newspaper with him.

"Are you... Going to sit down and read that?"

Nanami realized he'd been standing up holding his coffee and newspaper for some time now, and remembered what he was doing before running into you. "Oh, yes. I was looking for some place peaceful and quiet to read it."

"You can, uh, sit at this table. I won't be here much longer" you replied, unconsciously hugging yourself through the nervousness. Nanami seemed like he was about to say something and gave up on it about three times before he silently walked towards the opposite end of the table. The sorcerer sat down, opened his newspapers and lifted it just enough to almost cover his face. 

"Hey, I'm back, and here's your cup of hot water" you heard Hiromi say right behind you, softly jumping in surprise. "I'm sorry for the delay, I was having a hard time finding the teapot."

Nanami's hands tensed up, slightly crinkling the newspapers, but none of you noticed that. Nanami had barely registered you accidentally calling him Hiromi when he came up to you, and Hiromi's presence right now just added insult to injury, because at this point, you and Nanami could just about explode out of sheer discomfort.

You, especially, felt the urge to dig a hole in the ground and bury yourself in it.

Hiromi put the cup in front of you and noticed Nanami was sitting at the table, sparing him a polite smile.

"Oh, Nanami, good morning. It's nice to see you." Hiromi was unsure as to how you were feeling about Nanami this point in time, since it was obvious he was the person you had feelings for and decided not to pursue anything, even if you hadn't told him that expressly. However, since you probably had invited Nanami to sit at the table with you, the former lawyer decided to be cordial, after all, he did appreciate Nanami ever since having worked alongside him. They both had more in common than he had previously thought.

You also remembered that, after their joint mission, Nanami and Hiromi had become somewhat acquaintances.

However, you weren't registering anything anymore, with the insomniac daze swirling the world around your head. Because of that, your decision was to just take some of your tea pouches from inside your belt bag and throw them in the cup of hot water, letting them do the talking.

"Likewise" Nanami replied, entire body tensed up, unable to look Hiromi in his eyes as he said it. The ratio sorcerer had finally found it in himself to respect the man, but this entire situation right now just felt like a mess. His eyes were scrolling through the news, but the words were not making any sense.

"I'm about to push another boulder uphill" Hiromi said, poking fun at a Sisyphus and the Rock analogy both of them had once made about the work of a jujutsu sorcerer.

Nanami hummed in something resembling amusement, and Hiromi smiled, directing his attention back at you.

"I have to go now, but I'll give you a call when I'm done today, okay?" He said, rubbing your shoulder quickly with his hand. Even though Hiromi had joked about kissing you 'whenever, wherever' and talked about making your relationship public, he didn't want you to feel uncomfortable with public displays of affection in the workplace.

Oh, if only he knew how deeply uncomfortable you were this very instant.

"O-okay. Have a nice one" you replied, looking at him.

He smiled at you and tipped his head to Nanami, waving as he began to walk away.

"Bye, colleague."

Nanami just hummed again, this time with the same cadence as one would use to say 'bye'. His jaw was completely clenched, so he figured avoiding actual speech was a wise decision.

Well, this can't get any worse, you thought to yourself.

Then, you looked at Nanami, and he seemed just about to snap from all the tension built-up in his body underneath the nonchalant facade.

Sighing, you thought about it, and decided to just do something about it.

"Higuruma, he... I mean, I-" words were struggling their way out, but you figured it was better to just address the elephant in the room before things got even weirder.

"He's a fine colleague and a diligent sorcerer" Nanami replied, not taking his eyes from his paper. It wasn't like him to compliment someone like that, and then it clicked for you.

Oh, he must have noticed it.

"I-" You stuttered, yet again. Why is it so difficult to talk about this?

"There really is no need to" Nanami said, flipping an unread page on his newspapers. "How have you been?"

This was his way of asking if you were happy.

"I'm good. Thank you for asking"

He smiled at you, and his gaze had a hint of sadness to it. It chipped achingly to your heart, but barely, as you both began sharing a comfortable silence for the first time since you had last spoken to each other, something you had grown so accustomed to for a long time before the fallout.

After a short while, you took a sip of tea, and just knew this tea definitely didn't have enough caffeine to wake you up for the remainder of the day. At that, you sighed, disappointed. 

Nanami noticed your disgruntled face, and waited a few moments before asking you what was wrong.

"My tea is not going to solve my tiredness right now. Not by itself, I mean. I'll also need some coffee" you answered, rubbing your eyes, trying to see if that would help. "I'm just too tired to sort that out right now."

"You can have mine" Nanami immediately replied, mindlessly.

"Are you sure I can have your coffee?" You asked, hesitant.

You can have anything you want from m- "Certainly."

You picked up his coffee cup from the table and gave it a light sip, feeling the perfect balance of sweetness and bitterness hit your tongue as you did. The roast wall also exquisite, and brought up all the best notes from the drink. Of course his coffee is perfect. 

"Thank you, Nanami" you said, checking your wristwatch.

"You're welcome" he replied.

You saw it was almost time for your first class, so you just grabbed both the tea and the coffee, one in each hand, and began walking towards the classrooms. However, you stopped in your tracks for a second, looking at Nanami, and said, "I hope we get to spend more silence like this again. I missed it."

The sorcerer smiled and lifted his gaze at you.

"So did I."

Happy with the answer, you hurriedly strode across the headquarters, not noticing you were drinking from both cups at the same rate.

[shady-tavern]

Rambled in the tags so I figured I'd ramble here since I didn't see an ao3 link and I'm not familiar enough with Patreon or Kofi to know if it has the leave comments/messages feature or what the etiquette for that there is. Our beloved hellsite is great for that.

Love your stories. Very comfy and relaxing, even the more intense storylines. Big "getting tucked into bed" vibes fantasy stories. Or reading in the woods like Frodo at the beginning of FotR.

The spacy ones are somewhat cerebral? All futury and yet so incredibly human. Fuck protocol indees.

And then like.... Action-y romance superhero stories. They don't revolve around secret identities... I'm realizing a lot of the hero/villain stuff I read specifically on tumblr doesn't as often revolve mainly around secret identities? Some to be sure, I wonder if miraculous ladybug fandom has taken over that niche? Thoughts for another time.

As I mentioned in the tags I'm a bit tired and the stories helped relax me. My cat helped some too ^_^

The superhero ones are delightful. I'm a sucker for romance. It feels bizarre compared to other romance stories, in all the best ways. It's all very soft and gradual. Almost the whole "fell first vs fell harder" and it seems many of your main characters are the fell harder. As if they had to come around and remember that they could be loved. Very burnout gifted kid mood with Demi vibes.

I dunno if there's a set rule to powers in your world(s). But I do so enjoy figuring out through the narrative what certain people can do. Getting just a specific peak into their lives. I don't mind or even really notice the first person. (My spouse has a hard time reading first person). But yeah, each one is also a little mystery in trying to piece together power sets and so on.

This is long and if you've read this far... Well I've posted stuff and love getting comments to note solely scream at a void. Thank you for sharing your stories!

Apologies for the late response and I saw your tags! I found them rather delightful, thank you for that! And for this ask as well, this made me smile a big, happy smile.

I am really very happy that you enjoy my stories! Writing brings me so much joy and happiness, that I always hope I can share that with someone who reads them. I hope that my stories can make someone feel better or make a boring day brighter or help someone bridge time as they wait for an appointment. I am very glad they give off such a lovely feeling! That's genuinely everything I could hope for!

I am very happy that I managed to write the alien and superhero stories well as well! They are a joy to write as well and I am glad that the way I write them makes for fun reading!

I am very happy that you could relax with my stories - and your lovely cat. Cats really are such sweet beings.

Haha yeah, I have a lot of "fell first vs fell harder" vibes in many of my stories. I often try to show and build a connection with the characters before love comes into play, which is very much a demi vibe and many characters are indeed almost surprised that they are loved by others. Or rather, by the person that they fell in love with in return.

There isn't really a rule that connects all the stories, it's more that powers have limits or prices or side-effects and it's up to the person who has them to figure out what to do with that. And those who have no magical or supernatural powers to speak off, they get to be clever and smart.

I'm very happy that you enjoyed my stories and thank you so much for all your kind words. It makes me happy to know that my stories are liked and that people had fun reading them.

[phantasmaw]

Since I won't be around much for a while, I wanted to say that I am really, very grateful to all my amazing partners! I'm slow (as has been established time and time again) and sporadic and so I'm incredibly blessed to have friends and mutuals who jump back into things with me whenever I have the time to be around. I always have and always will adore getting to dig into so many fun, unique dynamics with y'all's muses. I also want to say I very much do notice all the little things-- likes on my metas/rambles and short ic quips, talking in the tags, back and forths in post replies --and they make me so happy! Something I'll never get tired of is how easy it is for us to appreciate each other's creativity and the care we put into our writing and little worlds. Once I'm able to be more present and clean things up here a bit, I'm looking forward to going full speed ahead... or as full speed ahead as I can get these days. If I don't get to say it come time, everyone have a happy holiday!

[animehouse-moe]

How I'm Tracking My Manga Reading Backlog

I'm bad at keeping up with reading sometimes. I'll read newer releases while still forgetting about some, want to re-read something even though I haven't started on another series, and leave droves of titles sitting on my shelves staring at me.

I got tired of that, and also tired of all these different tracking websites and apps that don't do what I want. So, with Notion and a few other tools, I've set out to make my own, and I like it! So I thought, hey, why not share how I'm doing it and see how other people keep track of their lists, so that's why I'm here. Enough rambling though, let me lead you through why I decided to make my own.

So, the number 1 challenge: Automation. In truth, it's far from perfect and is the price I pay for being lazy. But, I can automate a significant chunk of the adding process. I've yet to find a proper way to go from barcode scanning on my phone to my reading list, but I can go pretty easily from an amazon listing to the reading list. With it I grab: title, author, publisher, page count, and cover image.

So what do I use?

Well, it's a funky and interesting thing called 'Bardeen' that allows you to scrape webpages (among other things), collect and properly structure the desired information, and then feed it right into your Notion database. It's a little odd to try and figure out at first, but it's surprisingly intuitive in how it works! Once you have your template setup, you just head to the webpage (I've found Amazon the best option) and hit the button for the scraper you've built, and it puts it into Notion.

It saves an inordinate amount of time in populating fields by hand, and with the help of templates from Notion, means that the only fields left "empty" are the dated fields for tracking reading.

Thanks to Bardeen, the hardest (and really only) challenge is basically solved. Not "as" simple as a barcode, but still impressively close. Now, since the challenge is out of the way, how about some fun stuff?

Data visualization is incredibly fun for all sorts of people. Getting to see a breakdown of all the little pieces that make up your reading habits is very interesting. Sadly, Notion doesn't have the ability to build charts from your own databases, so you need a tool.

The one I ended up settling on was 'Grid.is', as it has a "direct" integration/embed with Notion.

Sure, it has its own "limitations", but they pose absolutely zero concern as to how I want to set up my own data visualization. You can have (as far as I know) an unlimited number of graphs/charts on a single page, and you can choose to embed that page as a single entity, or go along and embed them as independent links. Either way, the graphs are really great and there's a lot of customization and options in regards to them. Also, incredibly thankful for the fact that there's an AI assistant to create the charts for you. The way that Notion data's read in is horrendous, so the AI makes it infinitely easier than what it appears as at first.

And yes, all those little popups and hover behaviors are preserved in the embeds.

Well, I suppose rather than talking about the tertiary tools, I should talk about what I'm doing with Notion itself, no?

Alright, so, like all Notion pages it starts with a database. It's the central core to keeping track of data and you can't do without it. Of course, data is no good if you can't have it properly organized, so how do I organize it?

With tags, of course! I don't have a massive amount of tags in place for the database, but I am considering adding more in terms of genre and whatnot. Regardless, what I have for the entries currently is: Title, Reading Status (TBR, Reading, Read, etc.), Author, Format (manga or LN), Date Started, Date Completed, Pages, and Publisher.

In addition to those "displayed" tags, I have two tertiary fields. The first is an image link so that entries can display an image in the appropriate view. The second, and a bit more of a pain, is a formula field used to create a proper "title" field so that Notion can sort effectively (they use lexicographic, so numbers end up sorted as letters instead). This is the poorly optimized Notion formula I used, as I don't have much experience with how they approach stuff like this. It just adds a leading zero to numbers less than 10 so that it can be properly sorted.

Of course this list view isn't my default view though, the calendar from the top of this post is. Most of the time though, I don't have it set to the monthly view, but rather weekly. Following up that view though, I've got my "up next" tab. This tab's meant to track all the titles/entries that I'm about to read. Things I'm planning to read today, tomorrow, or the day after. Sorta a three day sliding window to help me keep on top of the larger backlog and avoid being paralyzed by choice. It's also the only view that uses images currently.

Following that, I've got my "To Be Read" gallery. I wanted to use a kanban board but notion will only display each category as a single column, so I chose this view instead, which makes it much easier to get a better grasp of what's in the list. I've been considering adding images to this view, but I need to toy around with it some more. Either way, the point is to be able to take a wider look at what I've got left in my TBR and where I might go next.

So overall, I've ordered these views (though the list view I touch on "first" is actually the last of the views) in order from "most recent" to "least recent", if that makes any sense. Starting with where I've finished, moving to where I go next, what I have left, and then a grouping of everything for just in case.

It's certainly far from a perfect execution on a reading list/catalogue, but I think personally speaking that it checks off basically all of the boxes I required it to, and it gives me all the freedom that I could ever want - even if it means I have to put in a bit of elbow grease to make things work.

[ohchosen]

GET TO KNOW THE WRITER - VAL EDITION !

what  made  you  pick  up  the  current  muse(s)  you  have?   i  first  played  ffxv  back  in  the  fall  of  2017  and  fell  head  over  heels  in  love  with  the  game.  to  this  day  i  don’t  think  there’s  ever  been  a  cast  of  characters  that’s  had  such  a  lasting  impact  on  me  as  the  boys  have,  and  at  this  point  ever  will.  i  actually  first  started  off  writing  prompto,  sometime  in  early  2018  and  shortly  thereafter  kind  of  fizzled  out  of  that  because  i  was  new  and  super  shy  and  didn’t  really  know  anyone  in  the  community.  i  was  around  18/19  then  and  actually  took  a  break  from  tumblr  for  a  little  while,  but  always  kept  in  touch  with  the  xv  community  on  twitter/instagram  so  the  love  i  had  never  went  away.  fast  forward  to  2020  and  after  replaying  the  game  i  decided  to  pick  up  noctis  who  at  that  point  had  been  my  end  all  comfort  character  for  a  few  years.  he very quickly became my little pincushion and then unintentionally a processing tool i used to process a lot of issues in my own life. i notice  a  lot  of  nuance  in  my  old  notes  and  ramblings  that  100%  reflect  my  struggles  at that  time and its like huh! wow! didnt know it did that. regardless, noctis is the muse i hold most dearly to my heart and someone i will love for the rest of my life. < he 3

is  there  anything  you  don’t  like  to  write?  ive  seen  it  all  brother.  i  can  be  convinced  with  one  skimmed  over  ao3  tag  and  then  some.  regardless,  i  don’t  have  any  hard  no’s  that  aren’t  the  incredibly  obvious,  and  i  think  rp  is  a  great  way  to  develop  and  analyze  your  likes  and  dislikes  in  a  safe  environment.  it’s  okay  to  be  into  something  in  one  thread  and  then  change  your  mind  later,  that’s  something  i  had  to  learn  the  long  way  but  i'm  better  off  for  it!

is  there  anything  you  really  enjoy  writing?  i  really  love  angst.  not  sure  what  happened  developmentally  to  get  here  but  we’re  here.  i  think  that  shows  a  lot  in  my  preferred  range  of  media  i  write  in  (or  just  consume  casually,)  there’s  just  a  certain….  je  ne  sai  quoi  🤌  in  writing  your  character  going  through  the  absolute  extremes  of  the  human  experience.  besides  that,  i  really  go  crazy  with  character  analysis/general  meta.  i  love  to  deep  dive  into  mundane  (or  otherwise)  aspects  of  a  character  and  build  up  traits  to  fully  flesh  out  a  muse. 

do  you  write  in  silence  or  do  you  play  music?  i  need  complete  silence  or  i  will  literally  never  finish  a  sentence.  i  am  way  too  scatterbrained  to  focus  on  two  things  at  once  and  need  to  lock  the  fuck  in  when  i’m  writing  a  reply. 

do  you  plan  your  replies  or  wing  them?  who  do  i  look  like  shakespeare.  i’ve  never  planned  out  a  thing  in  my  life  im  consistently  operating  strictly  off  vibes. 

do  you  enjoy  shipping?  im  a  dirty  little  shipping  whore. shipping is god's gift to the planet what else would i do if not daydream about my two little guys passionately kissing in a field of wheat.

what’s  your  alias/name?  val  :3  my  psn  tag  is  a  variant  of  valkyrie,  and  after  i  was  tired  of  my  old  alias  i  looked  there  for  inspiration.  say  thank  you  god  of  war  (2018)  for  shooting  me  into  another  norse  mythology  frenzy,  feels  just  like  middle  school. 

age  &  birthday?  my  golden  birthday  is  this  july  (25th)!!!  ((mild  existential  dread))

favorite  color?   green,  brown,  black  and  purple❗️

favorite  song?  recently  rediscovered  since  u  been  gone  by  kelly  clarkson.  having  daily  religious  experiences  for  it. 

last  movie  you  watched?  lord  i  have  no  idea.  i  don’t  watch  too  many  movies  and  the  last  one  i  can  place  is  catching  the  second  half  of  47  meters  down  when  i  was  having  dinner  with  my  dad  a  few  weeks  ago.  yay  sharks.  and  mandy  moore!!!!

last  show  you  watched?  i  love  a  good  netflix  documentary  and  i  just  finished  one  called  the  program:  cons,  cults  and  kidnapping,  which  was  about  exposing  the  troubled  teen  industry.  it’s  a  super  interesting  watch  but  deals  with  quite  a  few  heavy  topics  so  if  you’re  interested  please  heed  caution!   i  also  just  started  american  nightmare,  but  im  only  about  30-ish  minutes  into  the  first  episode….  gotta  lock  in. 

last  song  you  listened  to?  according  to  spotify  it  was  safari  song  by  greta  van  fleet  but  according  to  the  fortnite  festival  session  i  just  had  it  was  carry  on  my  wayward  son  by  kansas.  literal  war  flashbacks. 

favourite  food?   dude  there’s  this  fucking  sandwich  place  by  my  house  and  they  literally  make  the  best  chicken  sandwich  i’ve  ever  had.  imagine  grilled  chicken  on  a  brioche  bun  w  cheddar,  bacon,  a  corn  salsa  and  slathered  in  chili  aioli.  walk  with  me.  it  sounds  wack  but  it’s  SO  GOOD.  i  dream  about  her…

favorite  season?  i  love  winter  i  love  being  cold  and  tucked  into  my  electric  blanket  listening  to  the  rain  outside.  all  of  you  summertime  elitists  need  to  get  off  my  lawn. 

do  you  have  a  tumblr  best  friend?   i  have  my  gaggle  of  tumblr  friends  turned  irl  friends  in  my  pockets  at  all  time  and  i  wouldn’t  trade  any  of  them  for  the  world.  i  met  one  of  my  oldest  friends  in  ye  olde  supernatural  rp  back  in  2013?  and  over  ten  years  later  WE’RE  STILL  FUCKING  HERE.  so  many  of  the  most  important  people  in  my  life  i’ve  met  through  tumblr and the amount of shit we've seen through the rpc's we've been in has bonded us all for eternity lmfao.

tagged by: @13nth thank u tea my love :* tagging: my homies @sherez @tactition @liegacy + anyone who's interested :3

[birlwrites]

regulus comforting barty in the last chapter was so !!!!!

I WOULDNT RIDE OFF INTO THE SUNSET WITHOUT YOU

THEMTHEMTHEMEHDHHDHSHDE

can u maybe talk about bartys thought process in this scene, ik regulus noticed him shutting down a bit but is he the type to overthinkiverthinkoverthink or just have sirens and screaming and crashing noises in his head when he's panicking

THANK YOU!!!

regulus does not overthink an emotional conversation one (1) time and accidentally POPS OFF with THERE'S NO HAPPY ENDING FOR ME UNLESS YOU'RE IN IT

barty's more of the *record scratch* *sirens* type, he doesn't really spiral the same way regulus does, it's a Red Flag Red Flag Red Flag sort of thing

buuuuut this scene isn't very long SO! i'm just going to go through the entire thing

(i'll be including direct quotes from chapter 54 below the cut, but i'm not going to tag this as spoilers since it's a chapter that's already been posted)

so, first of all: barty comes in expecting this to be about the war. that's important because that's his mental context - this is about battle and loyalty and allegiance and intelligence and whether evan is trustworthy. because 'is evan trustworthy' was a question barty and regulus were asking each other YESTERDAY. LITERALLY THE PREVIOUS DAY. (a lot of words have elapsed since it's a busy couple of days for regulus, but like, THAT WAS SUNDAY. THIS IS MONDAY. TECHNICALLY TUESDAY BECAUSE IT'S AFTER MIDNIGHT BUT EMOTIONALLY MONDAY.)

and he is also tired and that's important too!! he is not alert, his brain is slow, he doesn't have Overthinking Everything About Evan to keep him awake (regulus has been vibrating out of his skin for the past 20 minutes at LEAST). like he's paying *attention* because this seems *important* but he is tired.

so right away: regulus goes off script. he's talking around stuff. he's mentioning lucinda???? lucinda's not involved in the war?????

this is when barty begins to get the sense that maybe he made an incorrect assumption about why he was being summoned at 2 in the morning. but he really does not know where regulus is going with this, so it's not an 'ohmygod feelings' moment, it's a '?????' moment. hence his visual confusion - he's very much lost already. regulus what. just tell me. i am so sleepy

but there's a long pause there!! and in that long pause, barty has the thought of: lucinda was gossiping about people yearning for each other at dinner.

he doesn't like having that thought, and that's why he responds with "Lucinda spent all of dinner talking about Hufflepuffs you find incredibly dull" - giving regulus an opportunity to clarify what the fuck he's talking about. and regulus... sort of clarifies, but not in a direction barty really likes - i'd call his thought process really along the lines of 'wordless seeping dread' here

and then regulus basically goes 'i have a huge crush on evan' and everything DOES click into place for barty

if regulus were in this position, he'd spiral - super long rambly paragraphs of inner monologue about implications and emotions and all of that. barty is more... nonverbal about it, if that makes sense? inarticulate? just like an 'oh.' and with that 'oh' comes a general sense of 'regulus is not mine anymore.'

after barty's "Oh" when regulus starts talking again, barty isn't really... listening? like he's hearing the words regulus is saying but he's just kind of mentally reduced to that one feeling, putting the world into a new configuration. when he says "So... you like him," that's... 'admitting defeat' is too strong of a phrase, but it's not WRONG. that's half resignation, half 'am i going insane, is regulus about to be like no dude how the fuck did you come to that wild-ass conclusion?'

because this is OUT OF LEFT FIELD for regulus. he's never breathed a word about being romantically interested in anyone ever. barty got very comfortable with that status quo. which is now being ripped out from under his feet. yay!

regulus, of course, charges onward - he's in Problem Solving Mode, but the problem he's focused on is the Evan Problem. but then barty lets some bitterness slip (he was trying to make a joke. it came out too real.) and then he gets The Regulus Stare Of Investigation because regulus has clocked that something is *off*

and that's when barty pivots! because regulus is asking him for help with this, and he's not going to just be an asshole to his best friend for the crime of having feelings for someone. he can be upset and angst over his life and his crumbling sense of self worth later. right now, regulus requires ASSISTANCE. and barty doesn't want to make regulus feel bad about asking for help because regulus DEFINITELY does not need that, he has a hard enough time with it as it is, and this is an emotionally sensitive topic and barty does NOT want regulus to shut him out so!!! time to be HELPFUL

but too late. regulus has found the problem and he is not letting go of it. barty tries to divert him with another wry comment of sorts, except it doesn't really work, and then he gets another Regulus Stare Of Investigation and then regulus hits him with the "I wouldn't ride off into a sunset without you. I wouldn't like it."

now, this is both a 'oh thank god' moment and a 'mortifying ordeal of being known' moment for barty. he doesn't quite want to acknowledge how PRECISELY regulus identified the problem, because that means acknowledging that on some level, barty *is* possessive of regulus, but in the sense of like... being possessive of his place in regulus's life as Closest Person? it's not even about being most important to regulus - it's about being closest to him. and regulus clearly knows that, which is... a vulnerable moment for barty

but regulus has reaffirmed the most important thing, which is that they are BFFs, and so barty's brain can slowly begin to work again now that regulus has removed the big sudden wrench in the gears

but he is still sleepy and he wants time to adjust/process, hence asking regulus if they really need to discuss it right at that second. if regulus had said yes, then barty would have done it, but he is relieved that he can go

and barty is STILL sad about it. that's important. he's going to be supportive but he's sad because it means their dynamic *will* change somehow, unless regulus gets over evan like. asap, which probably won't happen. but at least regulus isn't *leaving.*

barty's going to continue to feel insecure about that - they'll need to talk about it more before it's really resolved, and to some degree barty won't really feel solid in the new normal until it's pretty settled and he actually knows how he and regulus work these days because he has proof

BUT!!! he and regulus are at least on the same page about being vital to each other's happiness. so there's that!

[disquietedpalefish]

So, basically the NieR games are a series of guilt trips, is what I'm getting from this so far.

[obey-me-headquarters]

It is Time. It is time to talk about my Obey Me Mc.

So, y'all are gone hate me for this, but their name......drumroll please.....

Mckaylie.

Which can be shorted be Mc!!

Ok  but really I just thought it would be hilarious to name them something that can be shortened to Mc. Because like. Everyone calls the maim character Mc. This is probably only funny to me but I'm sticking with it. Can also be called Kaylie/Kay.

I haven't actually probably drawn em yet, but I've been obsessed with Picrew lately and made a few that looks the most like them.

Their pronouns are they/she.

Physical description: a warm body tone and a bright amber red hair color. Their hair is dyed that color. They have olive green eyes and ha few tiny freckles on their nose. Their hair is long and tied in a high pony tail. Not pictured is their hair tie that has two ends the shot up like bunny ears. Their color palette is red and green. If theyre not wearing their RAD uniform theyre wearing their baggy green jacket and a black crop top with a red skirt, black thigh highs, and grey shoes. They wear a ribbon choker and dangling earrings, usually childish ones such a frogs, aliens, or cherries.

They're absolutely an chaotic little shit that's only like, 5'3. When they're not hiding "I believe" aliens stickers around the house of Lamentation and RAD they're actually really sweet! The hypeman every friend group needs. Their thoughtfulness comes out in big loud ways, and also in small silent ways too. They like to tag along with Mammon when he goes to photo shots, always there to hype him up behind the camera. Asmo and them have frequent gossip sessions while they do each other's nails and talk about RAD. They stay up all night listening to Levi ramble about anime, giving in their input whenever there's a pause to show that they're still listening. If they notice Lucifer's light still on they'll go and make him a cup of coffee before sitting down and helping him with his paperwork.

They were also very really angry at Belphie for killing them. But I swear that's a whole new post because I have THOUGHTS about that lol.

They're also incredible curious. Wanting to know anything and everything about the Devildom, and also the people around them.  If they were a avatar of sin themselves, they would be the avatar of curiosity.

I tired to base my Mc on the Mc we play as in game rather than, myself. Which is the reasoning behind why they're such a hype man. (For some reason in a lot of events most your dialog is just hyping other characters up? Like in the recent egg event the second chapter is just you telling the characters how good theyre taking care of their pets. I can't go though that without creating a Mc whose like that lol)

As for why they're curious, Mc in game is also just really nosy? So I thought it would be funny if the reason why my Mc is so curious is because that's their sin.

Moving onto my other Oc, here is Vincent/Vin. Ok so Kaylie had this childhood best friend before getting yoinked into the Devildom, and that's Vincent.

Kaylie is like, 20 at the start of the game. Highschool really burnt them out so they didn't go to collage immediately after. But when they turn 20 they decide to give it another shot and starts implying to schools. They kind of just applied to a bunch of them and one of them happened to be RAD. Which is how you get the letter asking you sign it and send it back in game. It also explains why Lucifer has a file of you.

Since Kaylie left returning all letters till the last minute, they accidentally sign their name and sent it back.

When the year is up and they return home, they reunite with Vincent and tell him basically everything that happened during their year away. Vincent is not happy about the whole "demons kidnapped my best friend, stuck them in a school were demons talked about eating them, threatened, almost killed, and actually killed" thing. No matter how chill Mckaylie is about it.

But Vincent can see how much they miss their demons, and when the idea of going back to the Devildom comes up, he agrees to come back with them so they don't have to chose between him or their demons.

I haven't gotten to season 2 yet but I imagine that most of the plot is just "Vincent being lowkey pissed at the demons 24/7 while also being extremely cuddly towards Kaylie because they were gone for an entire YEAR! While Kaylie is just there trying to get their favorite people to get along."

Image description of Vincent: a pale skin tone with a beauty mark right under his left eye. His ears have multiple piercings and are frequently decked out. His hair is a messy of washed out blue from a dye job that never filly went away. His eye color is a deep blue. He always wears a tried expression on his face that squints a lot. This is because he doesn't have 20/20 vision but refuses to get glasses because he doesn't want to look like a nerd. His color palette is blue and yellow, with him frequently wearing yellow tee shirts and long sleeves. Besides wearing yellow he also likes pastels, and can wear a myriad of crazy colors. While Kaylie's colors are usually dark besides her hair, Vincent's the opposite, having deep dark hair and likes to wear light colors. He also likes funny graphic teas like hello kitty or egg print tees.

Personality wise Vincent is often labeled as dry or mellow, but has a fighting spirit if you piss him off. He can be quite controlling and stubborn, but backs off immediately if he notices he's upsetting the other person. He doesn't have much shame and will say what's on his mind often, often complimenting and admitting how much Kaylie means to him.

As for his and Kaylie's dynamic. They're childhood friends which means that they know that they're always going to be friends. Since they had so many fights growing up they know that no matter what they say to each other, in the end they will always apologize. So they don't have any issues with calling the other out on their bullshit. Vincent can read Kaylie very easily and knows when she's putting up with stuff that males her uncomfortable to be nice, while Kaylie can tell when Vincent is being manipulative and controlling because he's doing what he thinks is best. Probably slept together like, twice before realizing that they were better as friends. Vincent is surprisingly the Responsible One(tm) because Kaylie is so chaotic and also very clumsy. Frequently held back Kaylie from walking into traffic because she wasn't looking where she was going. While Kaylie stops Vincent from punching anyone that pisses him off.

(And that's all for now!! Wanted to get my Mc out there because I'm thinking of writing some fics solely focused on her because I have ideas!! As y'all can probably tell lol. If any of y'all want the Picrews for any of these just lemme know I should have all of them on file)

[astras-world]

Rich kid! Peter Stark Au

Warning: Smut, swearing, jewelry fetish (?), dom! Peter parker slight bdsm (bondage) orgasm denial, over stimulation, bullying

Requested: No. Please do send in requests.

Pairing: Peter Stark x Reader

Summary: Peter gets fed up with the bullying then reveals a fantasy.

(Also why is this scene so hot? Like??? It's illegal to look hot that much okay Tom?)

Peter would never be one to show off his wealth, he was humble, a trait his father was proud of yet confused by.

All his life Peter had every thing he could ever want and need and Tony made sure he was well loved as well and yet Peter didn't like showing off or even making it known that he was rich but there would be times when Tony knew the Kid felt a little more confident than other days it usually happens when something good happens like when the two of you started dating, the next day Peter wore a limited editon Gucci jacket he was aware of the stares and he loved it.

Peter usually doesn't splurge but whenever he gets the chance to give you something he would always go all out.

His first gift to you was 3 months after you started dating, he'd gotten you a diamond ring and you stared at him in shock

'Peter, I love you with all my heart but I really don't think we're ready for that" you say nervously

"What?" He looks at you confused then looks at the ring again and realization dawns on his face and he laughs

"oh baby, I'm not proposing" he chuckles slipping the ring on your ring finger

"Not yet at least. This is a promise ring" He smiles at you.

"A promise ring? Peter this must have cost you millions how much even is this?" you were scared to even find out the numbers behind the expensive ring sitting on your finger

"Babe, don't worry about it, this is nothing. I only want the best for my girl." He smiles at you and as much as you want to melt right there you were still concerned about him spending so much money on you.

"Baby, really it's no problem, please just accept it?"

After that the gifts seem to only go up in price from dresses to shoes and bags and the only time he gave you a gift that was below thousands of dollars was a photo album that he put together of his favorite pictures of you since he loved to take pictures and he made a scrapbook out of it and gifted it to you on your birthday.

Today was one of the days when Peter felt a little confident, you knew because he used his favorite Balenciaga shoes and you can smell his favorite Valentino fragrance on him. He greeted you with a kiss as he walked up to you a smile never leaving his face

"Well hello sunshine, what's got you in such a good mood?" You greeted smiling widely at him

"Nothing, I just finally finished the project I was working on down at the lab" He answers smiling even wider than earlier

He always felt a little more confident whenever he finishes a project, he feels accomplished and thus trigger his 'Stark!' side.

"Well congratulations, tiger. I'm very happy for you." you said smiling brightly at him

He takes your hand in his and your knuckles before walking you to your class. He waves as you go in and heads to his class

You meet again later at lunch where you eat with him, ned and mj at your usual spot. You were all discussing plans of going to Peter's place for a movie night in the coming weekend when Flash walks up to your table

"Sup Penis?" He says with a smirk

"What do you want, Flash?" Peter replies flatly

"Well I just wanted to say hello to lovely (y/n) over here" He says eyeing you.

"Well you've said it, can you go now?" You ask sharply

"No need to get riled up princess, hey give me a call when Penis over here can't satisfy you anymore" He says teasingly

"No thanks, I'm sure a chipmunk could satisfy me better that you can ever satisfy any girl on this planet' You smiled fakely

"What the fuck did you sa-" Flash grabs your arm and Peter immediately grabs his arm and twists it

"Grab my girl again and you won't have an arm next time" Peter says darkly

"Whatever, Penis. Everybody knows your 'Balenciaga' shoes are fake anyway." Flash pulls his arm away and huffs in irritaion

"You mean like all your 'designer clothes?" Peter fires back quickly. "impressive though maybe next time cut off the tag that says poshmark, yeah?" He says with a hint of amusement

Flash gets flustered by the remark and stomps away.

"God, when will he ever leave us alone?" you say rolling your eyes.

You continue the rest of the day without any more interruptions but Peter seems a little off ever since the encounter in the cafeteria so you when you get to his place like you usually do you decide to drag him up his room and confront him

"okay what's up?" you ask as you lock the door to his room and sit down next to him on his bed

"it's nothing babe, just tired" he smiles a forced smile at you and he knew you weren't convinced.

"Peter? Honest answer?" You ask once again raising your eyebrows at him

"I just... thought about what Flash said earlier." he admits

"Which one?" you ask

"The one where I uhm- don't satisfy you" He answers slowly and his face flushed of embarrassment his eyes not meeting yours as he was obviously shy about the subject.

Peter was always shy around talking about sex but he listened to what you said you liked and tried to implement it to your sex life as much as he could, he never really told you any fantasies or fetishes and kinks. He was incredibly shy when during your first time but he was amazing.

"Aw baby," you laugh at him amused making his face flushed more "you've done nothing but satisfy me both on and off the bed, okay? You always do." you say sincerely cupping his face with your hand and making him look up at you.

"What I'm more worried about is if I'm satisfying you" you say

"What? Of course you do, baby." He says looking up at you confused

"Well you never really tell me what you like, what turns you on and such" you say shrugging

"Well, you turn me on baby, everything you do turns me on" He says holding your face and swiping gently on your cheek.

"So no fetishes, kinks, fantasies?" you ask

"Well.." he leads on

"so there is! Mr. Peter Stark has a kink!" you chuckle throwing your hands up in success "What is it babe?" you ask smiling

"it's weird really, it's fine if we don't do it, it's okay, we don't have to" Peter rambles.

"Baby, it's fine. tell me please?" you say pouting.

"fine its uh- umh- it's more of a fantasy I guess?" he stutters as he starts and you hum telling him to continue

"uhm I wanna fuck you while you're wearing diamonds and heels and nothing else." he says shyly expecting you to reject the idea

This shocks you a bit but then you remember all the times he's given you diamond accessories and how happy he was but also nervous when you wear them, it turned him on seeing you wear expensive things he buys you.

"uhm- well I don't exactly have your gifts on me right now?" you say still a little shocked.

"wait, your want to do it?" he asks surprised

"well yeah, it actually sounds really hot amd I'd love to do it with you but i don't have your gifts on me right now." you say

"uhm- well there's an uhm box in my closet filled with those kind of things if you really want?" he says nervously, your breath hitches

"you keep a box full of diamonds in case i agree with your fantasy?" you ask

"Well, kinda? I was planning on giving you those things anyway but uhm you found out" he says swallowing nervously.

"okay, let me get changed and-" you start but Peter cuts you off, "actually uhm, can I- can I do it?" Peter asks shyly a tone of hopefulness in his voice

"do what?" you ask confused

"Can I uhm- put it on you?" he requests his face heating up and you can't help but smile at how cute he looks

"okay babe, do what you want with me" you say smiling and stand up.

Peter starts to undress you as soon as he hears your approval his hands fumbling with your shirt, you lift your hands to let him take it off revealing your belly button peircing. Next was your pants, he unbuttones your jeans and slides the zipper down he slips it off your body leaving your underwear, he takes off your bra next leaving you practically naked. He steps back and stares at you

"you look beautiful baby." he leans in and kisses you on the lips "I'll get the things go sit on the bed" he says and goes to his walk in closet,

he's gone for a couple of minutes before returning with a big box he opens it and everything sparkles in your eyes. Every piece looks amazingly beautiful and crazy expensive. He reaches for the shoes first.

He kneels in front of you and slips the heels on your feet leaving kisses as he does next he pulled out two thick diamond bracelets and clasps it around both of your wrists followed by several thin diamond rings slipping them through your fingers he kisses the back of your hand after. He pulls out a thick diamond chocker and kisses your neck before clasping it around your neck and then the final piece is a diamond chain bra, it covers nothing but it's surprisingly more comfortable than you thought it would be.

He steps back to look at his handy work he gulps visibly "fuck baby girl, you look better than I thought you would." he says breathless

You feel shy all of a sudden, you weren't used to having billions of dollars in your body but you certainly loved Peter's reaction to it.

"Go lie down baby girl" Peter instructs and you comply you lie down flatly in the bed looking at the mirror on the top of his bedroom and you see how sexy you look with all of Peter's jewels on and you gasp slightly at the sight.

Peter notices your reaction. "You look perfect don't you, baby?" you look back at him and he's putting on his web shooters "Why are you wearing those? You asked him confused

"you'll find out soon, love" he smiles gently at you. "Karen, do not disturb protocol, please" He orderes to the AI

"Do not disturb protocol enabled." Karen replies

Peter walks up to you and lies on top of you using his arms to lift him up away from your face so he doesn't crush you. He then kisses you hungrily you kiss him back with the same force, one of his hands go down between you two and plays with your clit through the fabric of your underwear.

You gasp lightly at the contact. He stops kissing you and put your hands up above your head and shoots webs making your hand stick to the head board

"As much as I love your hands, I wanna be in control tonight love" He says lust clear in his eyes, be takes off your underwear and he kisses you again an continues to play with you clit

"So wet, love" Peter comments pulling away from your lips

"All for you" you sigh as the pressure inside you builds up as he plays with you. He pulls away from your lips and licks one thing of your nipples that were sticking out from the bra, he pushes a single digit inside you and you arch your back in pleasure

"Baby please," you whine wanting more than his fingers. "Be patient, love" He replies pushing another digit in and curling his fingers in a 'come here' motion you gasp in delight as he finger fucks you and you feel yourself so close to your orgasm

"Baby, I'm close fuck" you pant and he pulls his fingers out in an instant "Peter, what?" you asked him in outrage, Peter never denied you of your orgasm cause he loves the face you make when you do. He stands up and slips a sleeping mask over your eyes and slips your underwear back on.

He simply smiles at you and stands up "I think that's enough for now, baby" he says walking towards his bathroom

"What?? Peter you can't be serious? At least get me out of here! I swear to god Peter Stark if you leave me like this you're not allowed to touch me for the rest of the year!" you shout at him as he enters the bathroom

He looks back at you and smiles "I'll take my chances, love" he winks and closes the door. You let out a frustrated growl cause you can't even touch yourself and as much as you pull at your wrist, the web won't come off.

You silently curse Peter in your head while glaring at the bathroom door when you suddenly feel vibrations coming from your underwear then you hear the shower start to run.

"Peter Stark, you little shit" you mutter unbelievably. You feel the intensity increasing and you can't help but whimper helplessly.

Within minutes you're trembling from the violent orgasm that hit you and you had an inkling feeling that it wouldn't be you're last

By the time that you heard Peter got out of the bathroom you were a whimpering mess after your third orgasm tears were streaming down your face

"Peter, please" you begged. Peter lifted the sleeping mask off your face and immediately an apoligetic look us written all over his face "shh baby, I got you. I'm sorry, love." He apologized over and over as he slipped the underwear off you and desolved the web in your arms

"I'm sorry baby," he says holding you close to him "I took it too far, I'm sorry, baby" he whispered

"hey, it's okay, Peter. I like this side of you" You explain your voice soft

"but I took it too far" He whispers in your ear

"I could've asked you to stop it, I liked it, Peter. But I'd like it better if you'd fuck me." you say against his neck

"you sure, babe?" He asked, a concerned look on his face

"Please, Peter. I need to feel you inside me" you beg quietly

And just like that a fire sparked in his eyes spreading your legs apart and before you could process it, Peter is thrusting himself inside you. You moan out loud and arch your back from the sudden pleasure spreading throughout your body, you hear him silently curse and he began slowly thrusting in and out of you

The slow pace was familiar to the both of you and while you usually didn't mind it you need more of him

"Faster, Peter" you whimper between moans. Peter obeyed your requests and quickened the pace, your head hitting against his headboard and left you a moaning mess, scratching his back.

One of his hands went to your clit, increasing the pleasure you've been feeling nearly sending you over the edge

"Fuck Peter, I'm coming" you moan "Hold it for me, baby" he says breathlessly his thrusts becoming sloppy

"Baby, please I need to cum, please let me cum" you whine against his skin "wait for me baby" he commands softly continuing to drive you insane till he feels himself coming close

"okay, love cum for me" as if on queue, you tremble against him as he thrusts into you riding out your high and he comes inside you filling you to the brim.

He lies down panting beside you, holding you close to him and kissing your forehead.

"Thank you, baby." he mutters against your head. You look up to him confusion on your face "What for, bub?" you ask him

"For letting me do this with you." he kisses you in the lips. You hum in approval

"it's nothing, baby. I enjoyed it. Didn't know you had this side of you though" you chuckle against his lips and sending him a wink

"Well I couldn't let you have all the fun, now can I princess?" He laughs.

"Fair point" you smile to him

"Let me take care of you, princess he says standing up and removing the jewelry from your body and picking you up towards the bathroom.

Safe to say that wasn't the last time that you saw that side of Peter Stark

[obsessivestar]

Steamy Love (A Tom Hiddleston x Reader) Chapter 30:~Time After Time~ FINALE

Summary: The nights alone have become colder and colder, and not just because of the weather.

Warnings: Angst in the beginning.

Read it on my Wattpad: www.wattpad.com/HiddlesStar

Word count: 2596

Tags: @theoneanna @midnightdragonzero @drakesfiance @kcd15 @ihthr @deviantsendbyreallife @bookgirlunicorn @cherrygeek86 @peachlobotomy666

A/N: This is it. The final chapter. Thank you so much for everyone that has liked, reblogged, or simply read any and every chapter of this fic. It's the first fanfiction I've completed in almost 5 years, but it's the first I've ever made public on Tumblr. It may be a while until I get back into writing completely, as I've decided to ship some of my creative focus towards drawing. I'm not very good at it, but I aspire to improve. Will I show my work at all? Maybe, if there's really a demand for it (though I doubt it lmao). I may post some Oneshots here or there. We'll see.

Until then, thank you for reading.

After you'd return home, Tom would start calling you at least twice a day for the next couple weeks. You didn't have the heart to block his number, but you certainly weren't going to pick up and talk to him. You couldn't believe what had happened at that event. You couldn't believe you allowed it to happen. You were always against public sex, but you couldn't help yourself around him. It's like he had you under a spell that forced you to need him. To desire him.

That's why you needed to stay far away from him. It doesn't matter that he loves you. He hurt you, in ways you can't even explain. In ways you don't want to explain. You just wanted to forget that night. Forget your feelings.

Forget him.

Though even after a month of locking yourself into your work, you still received his calls. You kept hearing about the play he was in and how great he was doing, even though the public had finally found out that you were no longer together. You couldn't help but check up on him and his play. While it hurt to hear his name, you were proud of him. You were proud of all he had already accomplished. You wish you could just talk to him and hear him boast about it. You were so excited to talk to him more about it before the big fight. It ate away at your heart that you couldn't hear him ramble about it. Hear the excited tone in his voice. You didn't want to stay mad at him, especially after the last thing he said to you...

Did he mean it? Did he...love you? Really love you? In truth, you were tired of being angry. You just wanted a chance to talk, but everytime he'd call you, you'd freeze up. You wouldn't, or couldn't answer.

That night, you really couldn't get to sleep, and you couldn't put on a happy smile for a stream. All you could really do is lay in bed with your phone beside you, quietly thinking to yourself.

You heard your phone begin to ring, looking at the Caller ID. You recognized the number. It was Tom.

You felt your heart flutter a little. You've been thinking about him all day, and you had wondered if these calls were ever going to stop. Did you even want them to stop?

Before the ringing would stop, you picked up the phone and answered it, holding it up to your ear. You heard nothing. Not even breathing.

"...Hello?..." You whispered, already feeling your emotions flare up. "...Tom?.."

"...You picked up.." You heard him speak, his tone sounding a little shaky. Had he been crying?

"Y-Yeah, I know..." You smirked slightly, sitting up some. "I-I guess I had to, eventually.."

"You...haven't picked up at all...f-for weeks.." Tom whispered. "I-I've just...been calling to hear your voicemail."

That hit you rather harder than you expected it to, already feeling tears well up in your eyes. You didn't want to get emotional again, but it was hard not to. He sounded sad.

"H...How's the play been?.." You asked, giving a shaky smile.

"Good.." You heard a half laugh from Tom. "I-It's been...fun. I...wish you could see it."

You frowned a little, closing your eyes to let some tears slowly fall down your cheeks.

"...Me too.." You admitted, giving a shaky breath. "I...I'm...tired of being angry. I want to talk.."

Tom let out another sigh, taking a minute to find the right words before speaking up again.

"...I was wrong to get angry at you.." Tom spoke, his voice a little shaky again. "I shouldn't of said the things I said, and I should've let you speak for yourself instead of barging out of that house and leaving you with all that paperwork. I regret it. I regret it all. I regret everything I did to you to make you upset, (Y/N).."

You frowned deeply, the hand holding the phone becoming a little shaky. You believed him, but part of you still hurt. He really did break your heart.

You sniffled somewhat, knowing he heard it. "D-Did you mean it?.." You finally managed to ask, your body shivering a little.

"I didn't mean to make you upset.." Tom spoke, though he was a little confused with what you meant.

"I-I mean...at the show.." You let out a shaky breath. "W-When you said you loved me...did you mean it? Or--Or was is just from the heat of the moment?.."

"...I meant it." Tom admitted, giving a slight sad chuckle. "I absolutely mean it. I love you.."

You couldn't help but smile, your heart fluttering up again. You placed a hand on your chest, feeling your heartbeat increase.

"...I love you too, Tom.." You spoke, holding back a slight sob.

You heard Tom give a shaky chuckle. You could practically see his big smile in your head. You missed that smile dearly. You wished you could see it again.

"S-So.." Tom calmed himself, clearing his throat a bit. "Wh-What now? Will you take me back?"

You smiled a little. "D-Do you think this would work? A long distance sort of thing?.." You asked.

"If I could fly you down here to be with me, I would.." Tom admitted. "But this play has me incredibly busy. I hardly have time to walk Bobby in the morning.."

"And I barely have the assets and time to actually start a moving process.." You frowned slightly. "Moving to another country, as much as I want it, would be ridiculously hard on my own."

You and Tom both went quiet for a moment, both of you really thinking about this. Neither of you had the time to help you get to him, but neither of you wanted to be apart for months. Who knows what else may come up during Tom's play? He could end up being gone until Christmas or something. You wanted to see him.

"I'm sure I'll think of something.." Tom finally spoke, smiling a little. "I promise. I'll find a way to you.."

"Don't start throwing money around to get to me.." You chuckled a bit, making him laugh as well. "As much as I miss you, I can wait for as long as you need me to."

"I'm not sure I can.." Tom admitted, letting out a slight sigh. "I'd love to catch

up with you on everything, but it's nearly 3 in the morning and I need to get some sleep.." Ah, you had forgotten about the Timezone differences. He's all the way up in London now, after all.

"I promised to call you before the play. I promise.."

"Okay.." You smiled warmly. "I-I love you, Tom.."

"And I love you, (Y/N). Truly.." He spoke in a warm tone. It made your chest feel all warm.

"Goodnight."

"Goodnight.."

He hung up first after that.

You set your phone down, feeling your heartbeat once more as a few more tears slipped down your cheeks. You forgave him and admitted that you loved him, but would you really be okay having to wait months and months to see him again? You just wanted to be in his arms again and feel his lips on yours. You were scared of how long you'd potentially have to wait.

Despite that, you were able to get some nice rest. You dreamed of the day you'd get to lay in his arms.

And it would come sooner than you thought.

Another month went by, and you had gotten yourself on to a talk show to talk about your rising fame and upcoming movie. You had never been on one before, so you made sure to doll yourself up a little bit and wear a nice dress. It would be weird going up there on your own, but you had heard and seen from other interviews that the talk show host man was really nice. After fixing yourself up in the mirror, you saw the show start. The talk show host introduced you to the audience before calling you on stage. You smiled brightly as you climbed the stairs and went on stage, seeing all of the people from the audience begin to cheer. All of those people made a permanent bright smile appear on your face. You waved at everyone with a soft chuckle before sitting down on the soft sofa, shaking the show hosts hand as everyone quieted down.

"So nice to have someone new for a change!" The host spoke with a chuckle.

"It feels amazing to be here.." You admitted with a bright smile, crossing your legs.

"So, you've got your first movie coming out, eh? Got yourself quite the co-star, I hear.." They began, leaning forward a bit on their desk. "How was that?"

You chuckled again. People had learned that you and Tom were back together, so you've never stopped hearing about him.

"Yeah. We actually had to live together by that little outdoor set.." You admitted. "I messed up with renting one of the houses, so he let me stay with him."

"And that's how you fell in love, yeah?" The host grinned, being interrupted by the audience clapping for a moment before they'd quiet down. That was so surreal to see.

"I always hear about flings happening between costars on set.." You admitted. "But...my time with him was much more than that. He's treated me better than most, that's for sure."

"You haven't seen him since the beginning of the year, yes?" The host asked. "Has that been hard for you?"

You smiled sadly, placing a hand on your chest some. "It's not impossible, but it's been hard. I'm not upset about it, though. We've both become incredibly busy rather quickly. He's got his play, which I hear is amazing, and I've been streaming practically 7 times a week now that I've had the time again."

"Well, it's good to know you're staying optimistic." The host replied.

"Yeah.." you nodded a bit. "It's been...a little harder these last couple days, though. We call each other multiple days a week."

"Do you have a song you like to listen to?" The host asked, smirking some. "One that reminds you of him?"

You took a moment to really think about that. The question brought you back to the time you and Tom went to the grocery store and Time After Time came on the radio in the car, and when he kissed you in front of everyone in that clothing shop, the same song played. You had downloaded the song on to your phone after that day. You didn't realize how important it was to you until now. Tom even had it on his phone, last time you checked.

"Cyndi Lauper's 'Time After Time', maybe?.." You admitted with a shy chuckle. "It's played a couple times during my days with Tom. I downloaded it after people found out we were together because it was playing in that clothing store when he kissed me."

"Awe, that's sounds perfect.." The host smiled brightly, one of his hands moving under the desk. "You think Tom would give the same answer?" They asked.

"I mean, he's into the older styles of music.." You chuckled, a little confused. "I could call him and ask him later.."

You were too focused on the show host to hear footsteps come upstairs on to the stage, though the surprise was ruined by the sudden erupting screams and applause from the audience.

You turned around just in time for the host to start playing that song over the little speaks around set as you and the man locked eyes.

It was Tom.

You couldn't believe it.

Your eyes immedietly watered as you got up from your seat and ran to Tom, seeing him open out his arms to you. You ran right into his arms, wrapping your arms around his body. You almost didn't believe that this was real. It felt like a dream. How was he here? How did he make time for this?

You pulled back and cupped his face with both hands, already nearly sobbing just from the sight of him.

"Are you actually here!?" You asked with a happy whimper. It warmed your heart to see his big smile. He was emotional, too.

"I managed to find some extra time to get a flight down.." Tom chuckled, though he wasn't able to explain himself fully just yet. Hearing his voice so close to you made you want to just break into happy tears right then and there, so you pulled him into a deep, passionate kiss. You heard the audience go nuts, making you smile in the kiss. Tom pulled you closer to him, keeping the kiss locked until he remembered you were supposed to be doing an interview. He pulled back and gestured to the seats, holding your hand as you both sat down.

You could barely keep your eyes off of Tom for the whole rest of the interview. Afterwards, you'd say goodbye to everyone and leave the building together. You spoke outside once you reached his car.

"I've got another surprise for you.." Tom admitted, giving you a warm smile as he let go of your hand. He moved into his car for a moment and pulled out something before going back to you. He revealed 2 one-way tickets. Tickets to the UK.

"Would you still like to move in with me, my love?.." He asked you, looking into your eyes with his big, blue orbs.

Your eyes widened some and your heart skipped a beat. You placed your hand over your mouth before giving a shaky chuckle. "A-Are you serious?..." You asked, seeing him nod.

"With one phone call to a familiar moving company and a day or two, you can be living with me.." Tom spoke. "All I need is a Y--"

"Yes! Hell yes!" You chuckled happily before wrapping your arms around his neck, pulling him into another close hug. Tom flinched before chuckling, hugging you back for a moment before pulling back to give you another deep kiss, inhaling some to take in how soft your lips were. The joy you felt in your heart couldn't be properly described.

You pulled back from the kiss to wipe all the tears that had run down your cheeks, including some of the makeup makeup had on. "I'm gonna end up crying all day.." you joked with a chuckle.

Tom chuckled as well, smirking some. "I could give you other reasons to have tears in your eyes.."

Oh god, you had a feeling he hadn't gotten over this flirtatious phase he's had with you.

Then again...

You chuckled some. "It's been a couple months hasn't it?" You asked, biting yhe corner of your lower lip.

"Mhmm.." Tom purred somewhat "and I've learned some things.."

"Have you, now?.." You tilted your head some, getting a nod from Tom.

"Indeed I have.." Tom grinned. "And there's a certain...doctor who has been dying to meet you."

You knew who he was talking about. You recently rewatched High-Rise.

"Ooh, I guess I shouldn't keep him waiting, then.." You purred back with a little wink, moving around him to get into the passenger side.

Tom snickered some, getting into the drivers side.

You bet there would be quite a bit of steamy love after packing.

[littleliv1]

I Was Born To Love You- Ben Hardy fanfic- Part Three

Hello, loves! Loving the feed back in getting on this series! It’s for sure a long one, but I hope you guys are enjoying it!

Summary: Leah and the crew flew to London to film the Live Aid performance. She opens up to Brian about her life.

Warnings: sadness, death, angst

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Soon enough, Monday rolled around. It was 4 am. I grabbed my packed bags, pretty much filled with half my wardrobe and all of the make up and face/hair products I could take on the plane. I grabbed my passport, keys, purse, and phone and left for the guys' house. They were all staying in one big frat house that they had rented. After picking them up, I also picked up Bryan, Brian, and Roger.

'Austin has barely spoken to me since Tuesdasy.'

I drove to the airport. Everyone was asleep, after all, the flight left at 5 am. It was a long flight to say the least. I sat in between Ben and Gwilym. I connected with the two better anyways. Gwilym slept the whole time, and Ben complained that his back hurt and he was so tired that he couldn't sleep. I felt more like a babysitter at that moment. I comforted him and played with his hair until he fell asleep. I also fell asleep. I felt myself starting to dream.

There he was. My beautiful girl. I carried her with me for 9 months, she was 12 days early. She was so eager to get here. She loves playimg dress up. She was so outgoing. She had my eyes. I loved her so much more than I could imagine. I felt the love of my life behind me, holding me, kissing my neck. "We made that," I said, cradling his arms in mine. "We sure did." That wasn't Austin's voice. Who was this? I turned around to the familiar blonde who was currently next to me. I gasped.

I gasped so hard, I woke up. I woke up to my phone going crazy. Joe had tagged me in a picture on Instagram. It was a picture of the three of us; Gwil with his mouth wide open, dead asleep and mine and Bens heads against each other's sleeping as well. I smiled at the cuteness of the two, until I saw the comments.

'Who the hell is she?'

'Does he know she's married?'

'Her poor husband :('

They all assumed we were an item. I don't understand. "Um, Joe?" I said quietly. "What's up?" He said. "I really adore this picture, but would you mind taking it down? It's he comments," I said. He looked at it, and he looked shocked. "I'm so sorry, yes of course." He said. And with that, the picture was gone. Out of sight out of mind.

Hours later, we arrived in London. I had booked the hotel in advance, making sure the top floor of the nicest hotel in the area was reserved for them. The cast stayed in the rooms upstairs, the crew in the floor below. I figured it'd help with keeping the pap and crazy fans out. I made sure security was at its finest so the cast could from one place to another, safely. Once we arrived at the hotel, I showed everyone to their rooms. The guys requested to share a room, so I made sure they got the biggest room. It had two king sized beds. The guys, Bryan, Brian, Roger, and I had a quick meeting. I explained to all of them the plan, where everything was, and how transportation needed to go.

Rami raised his hand. "You don't have to raise your hand, Ram." I said. "Where are you sleeping?" He asked, the other guys responding with "yeah?" I laughed a bit. "I'm a few doors down. I've got the second biggest room." I said point to the direction of your room and flipping your hair. "Mmmm, no you need to sleep here with us." Gwilym said. "Who else will protect us?" Joe chimed in. "I'm your assistant, not your body guard." I said giggling a bit. I really was their babysitter. "Please, Leah? Pretty pretty please?" Ben whined. "I'll stay in here for as long as you want but I'm sleeping in my room, end of discussion. I'm married, remember?" I said, showing my beautiful ring. Ben looked at me, raising his eye brows. Only he knew what had happened. "I'm starving," Roger said. "Where can we eat?" "You guys can stay in my room and eat. My bags are unpacked and my room is ready, someone else is coming up here with your bags. I would unpack them for you but those are your personal belongings and I wouldn't feel comfortable with touching them. I've ordered some room service, I already know what you all like, so you guys can head over to my room," I said handing Bryan my key. "And chill out there for a bit. Just don't go through my stuff." I said. Everyone got up, Ben was the last out. Before he left, it was just us two in the room.

"How are things?" He said looking at my arm, the bruises had gone away. I nodded my head. "Okay. Could be better. Hasn't really talked to me. He's only come home before 3 am once last week." He could tell I had been holding these feelings in. "It sounds like to me you need to talk to someone about it. Get a second opinion." He said crossing his arms. I shrugged my shoulders. "Not much to talk about, really. He started to get really possessive and jealous when I took the job as assistant to Bryan. He's convinced that you all won't respect me. He didn't even care that I was leaving for a month or more. He only makes love to me when he's drunk, and it's not even passionate anymore. Just drunk, messy, and to be blunt, short. It's like he doesn't love me anymore but I know that's not true, I don't think." I said. I realized I had been rambling on for a while, I rambled myself near to tears.

I looked up at him and he seemed genuinely hurt by that fact that I'm hurting. I opened my mouth to say something, but was interrupted by a knock at the door and it opened slowly. "Bags, ma'am." A man said. "It's okay, come on in, leave them out infront if the beds, the boys can choose where they sleep." I said to him. He obeyed, and left to deliver more bags. "Sorry. I just can't really deal with this right now. It's best that we have this break, maybe this is just what we needed right now, a break. I don't want to focus on it, I want to focus on the movie." I said. I nodded at your comment. "Yeah." I said walking out of the room, into my room.

"Leah, you're a genius. How'd you know what we all liked?" Brian said. I laughed a bit. "It's my job to know." I said. I hadn't finished unpacking my bathroom bag, so I grabbed that and start to unpack it. "Hey, where's Ben?" Rami asked. "Probably still in your all's room. Your bags are in there, he might just be unpacking his. You all need to pick your beds." I said from the bathroom. Joe jumped up, running out the door. "I call next to Ben!" He yelled running to his room. The others followed. As I was unpacking, I saw some feminine hygiene things, which reminded me. I hadn't started yet. What day was it? I forgot when I started, but my period was never regular. I just knew I hadn't had one yet this month, and the month was almost over. 'Oh god please no...'  I thought to myself. I couldn't have a baby, not right now at least. Not until he was better. Because he was sick. That's why he hurts me. He's just sick. While I was staring at it, Brian came to the door, knocking quietly. He smiled nicely at me. "Everything alright?" He asked, leaning against the door. "Oh, uh, yeah." I said, throwing them in your bathroom box, it was three drawers on wheels to keep things in when I'm away for long periods of time. "Anything I can do you for, sir?" I asked, making eye contact. The way he looked reminded me of my parents. It was hard to look at him but harder to look away. He shook his head. "No, not at the moment. You don't have to call me sir, love. Just Brian will be okay." He said smiling again. I nodded your head. I didn't mean to seem tense, but I couldn't help it.

"It's just you and me in here right now, but I want to get to know you, if that's alright." He said. "Alright, what would you like to know?" I said leaving the bathroom, sitting at the small table provided in my room. He sat across from me, facing the door. "Tell me about when you first listened to Queen." He said. "Hmm," I hummed, I don't really remember Queen becoming part of my life, they just were. "I can't say I remember, no. My parents," I choked at that word. "My parents, really enjoyed the music. Went to concerts all over the world, followed your A Night At The Opera tour, even. You all were part of our family. When Freddie died, it felt like they lost someone. It was very personal to them." I explained, chewing at my lip, praying he wouldn't ask what he was about to ask. "How did they react when you told them about this movie?" He asked curiously. I couldn't help but to get mad, but I couldn't show it at all, the man didn't know they were gone, it wasn't his fault.

'They were gone,' I thought.

I laughed to myself a bit. Not because it was funny, just ironic. I looked down, trying hard to not shed the tears that were already coming. "They, uh," I started. He grabbed my hand, he could tell this was hard for me. "They're no longer here." I said, wiping away the tears to keep my make up from running. He squeezed my hand, looking shocked and feeling the pain I felt. "They passed away in this crazy train wreck, it'll be two years next week actually. It happened about three hours south of here." I said trying not to lose control. "I haven't tried avoiding you or Roger by any means. It's just so painful still, but getting to know you two, two people who I've considered family my entire life, it's been incredible. Unreal. I'm so honored to assist you both." I said, looking in his eyes, with salty tears in mine. Right now, I just wanted Lola.

I felt a bond with him. Obviously not in a romantic, gross type of way. But I haven't felt a connection, a family connection, with someone in a while and I knew my body ached for it again.

"I'm so sorry, my love." He said. I shook my head. "No it's okay, I'm fine. It's still just so hard. I didn't have siblings, my parents, who were both only child's, are gone. My only family now is my husband and he comes home smelling like alcohol and uses me as a punching bag and a sex toy and-" I stopped myself when that came out. Brian grabbed my hand with his other hand. "You need to leave him, Leah. We're your family now." He said so genuinely. I shook my head. "No I'm just your assistant. That's all I'm good at is doing stuff for others. Not that I don't want to, I love helping you guys do things when you need help!" I said correcting myself, not wanting to sound ungrateful. I couldn't help but to break down. "I'm sorry." I said, I couldn't help but sob.

With that, my phone went off. The touring manager calls. I think it's about the set, there's been a lot of issues with that. "I'm sorry." I repeated. I felt bad because my problems weren't his and I know that, I just couldn't help telling him. And I left the room.

Ahh! So exciting finally getting to share this series! I might post part four later today. Hope you all are enjoying! Xx

[cinnamon-grump]

Can someone explain to me what's happened with CJ and stuff? From his twitter I'm gathering that he's claiming ownership of anti? He seems to hate Mark for whatever reason too! And he responds to septiplier hate... all the time... I am confused.

i was gonna answer this privately cause im tired n wanna like.. just not post more about it on my blog, but... fuck it. here we go. I’m sorry for the rambly bs ahead, I’m trying to be as thorough as possible.

What you’re seeing about anti is... they’re basically orphaning their specific renditions of anti and dark. They for some reason had the most prevalent and popular versions of them, and people would draw fanart of their fanart constantly. it was kinda ridiculous but like... I think it was partly because they held some drawing contest or whatever and people wanted to mooch off their popularity.... idk, point is, they’re not claiming ownership of anti as a concept, but rather are giving up their physical rendition of Anti (and Dark) and letting people just use it however they like, without having to come to them and ask if it’s ok first. 

Hates Mark for several reasons. here’s where things are gonna get a little vulgar on my part. I apologize, please proceed with caution as some of this will definitely be upsetting to hear...

they had managed to get him to follow them on twitter at some point, and that kinda... fueled their obsession with him? and things got weird. While he was following them, they not only posted NSFW septiplier art publicly where he could see it, but also was posting some pretty weird nsfw/implied nsfw shit of their sona/mark as well. He unfollowed them then, which sent them into a rage on several different social media platforms. They complained about how septiplier is such a great ship, and to prove some incoherent point about how nsfw stuff is okie dokie to post in the tags they even went so far as to repost other people’s smut without permission. (this was the part that I witnessed personally, in the brief time that I was following them there. It was a mess and I was honestly floored that they’d go so far as to steal and repost people’s stuff just for the sake of getting attention and undeserved sympathy.

I guess they happened to be one of the people who won an ipod in a charity stream giveaway a while back. Very soon after that stream, Mark’s friend Daniel committed suicide, which was very hard on him. CJ was pissed that the ipods weren’t sent out right away because of this, and blamed the delay on Daniel, called him selfish, specifically because of the point in time that he chose to go... They were incredibly disrespectful to Daniel and Mark alike, and went crying to anyone and everyone hoping for some kind of response from them. That didn’t quite work out, but I believe Keemstar did write some bullshit about it.

they apparently managed to meet Mark recently, and he allegedly straight up told CJ that their obsession with him was unhealthy, which sent them into yet another tantrum, which became the mess you can now see on their twitter. They have since then been accusing him of being selfish and wanting nothing but to show off how rich he is or what the fuck ever. Saying that he only does charity stuff to flash his money, and that he’s totally taking a percentage of the funds raised and keeping them (which is absolute bullshit... you can’t point out a “portion of the proceeds will go to charity” disclaimer on physical merchandise and scream about injustice when, in the real world, making the merchandise has a fucking cost, they can’t just produce massive amounts of shirts and stuff for free??)

as for the responding to hate thing, it has become more and more clear that CJ just... doesn’t WANT to have any kind of positivity on their blog/twitter/what have you. They certainly are getting a lot of friendly and kind responses alongside the hate, but ONLY respond to hate because... I don’t know. They thrive on the negativity. Positivity just gets ignored. It’s a mess and isn’t worth anyone’s time. 

also pain anon if ur reading this hi, I know u didn't mean u wanted a witch hunt, I wasn't trying to imply I thought u were calling for one, I just wanted to accentuate that we don’t need one and should not start one, because I've already had one person come directly to me and show me the hate they sent CJ so proudly, and that is unacceptable. 

Spreading facts is different from spreading hate. Don’t be a dick.