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help-i-lost-my-sock · 7 months

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A Penny for Your Thoughts (Ace x Reader)

A/N: While I love cocky, confident Ace, I felt like the softer, more damaged side of him deserved some love too <3

Summary: Ace has been feeling a bit low lately, and has been isolating from Reader, and the crew. Reader goes to talk to him, and a rather emotional interaction ensues. Please see warnings.

Warnings: Ace is having an emotional, and vulnerable moment. Ace struggling with his self-worth. Mentions of alcohol usage.

Writing prompt:

"Did you just kiss me?"

"Was I not supposed to?"

"I don't know... But can you do it again?"

Tags: Ace x Reader, angst & comfort, Ace dealing with self-worth issues

Word count: 2900

~O~O~O~O~O~O~O~O~O~O~O~O~O~O~O~O~

You and Ace had been close friends for quite some time now. Very close, actually. Not quite as close as you’d have liked to be, but that did not matter much, as long as you had his friendship. Yes, if nothing else, his friendship was enough.

Lately though, your friendship seemed to have been somewhat shaken. For some reason, Ace had been distancing from you, and all others lately. Sure, he’d still act fine when people talked to him. But that was not quite the way it used to be… The Ace you’d known so far was a bit of a chatter box - that is, when he was not fast asleep on the deck, or with his face in a plate of food. He loved to socialise with the crew, and was always offering to help wherever he felt he could be of any use. He’d often be engaged in some conversation or another, swapping tips and tops, cracking jokes, or regaling his men with tales. Now, however, he’d rather lean over the railing, gazing at the sea, lost in thought, or sit alone, isolated, than engage with others. He’d slip out during group conversations, or spend hours shut in the study, haunched over maps, and documents, working his way through endless stacks of paperwork - a task he’d always dreaded more than any other. It was not quite the same, no.

It would be a lie to say it did not worry you. Ace was your best friend, and, if you were being honest with yourself, he was a bit more than that. It was only natural for you to notice, to miss him, and to worry. You couldn’t bring this up around others - it was clear it was not something he’d want broadcast in front of a crowd. So, you decided to speak to him as soon as you’d catch him alone. It shouldn’t be too hard. Afterall, he tended to seclude himself every chance he got those days. So, you waited. Ace had spent most of the day in the study. At lunch, there was not enough privacy to speak to him, so you let it slide. Afterwards, he disappeared, and you had no idea where.

Eventually, night had fallen, and the Whitebeards were having a party on the main deck. It seemed like your plan would have to wait another day. The crowd grew and grew, as the music played, and the booze flowed. It was not unusual for pirates to party, and the parties on the Moby Dick never disappointed. Or at least, they never had, until this point. For, as expected, you could not find Ace anywhere in the crowd, and a party without him simply felt incomplete.

You spent some of the night gliding through the crowds, slipping from clique to clique, from conversation to conversation, eventually setting camp up by yourself by the refreshments table. You sighed as you scanned the swaying masses, as they sang, and danced, and chatted… as if they hadn’t even noticed.

“Hey,” came a voice from behind you, as a hand gently grasped your shoulder. You turned around to find Marco, and Thatch. Thatch had a compassionate smile on his face, and, while Marco didn’t show it on his lips, the same compassion, and understanding could be read in his eyes as he looked down at you, secluded as you were, camping alone by the booze.

“We know,” Marco says softly. You tilt your head sideways, questioning him with a silent look.

“You must be thinking we hadn’t noticed how Ace has been drawing himself back lately,” he starts, as he takes his hand off your shoulder, and turns to look at the merry-makers. “How can the crew party as if they don’t even notice? But we do notice. We all do.” Now that he mentioned it, it dawned on you that Ace’s presence was not the only absence here tonight - a certain carefreeness seemed to escape many that night, and certainly those close to Ace - you, the commanders, Pops, and the men of his division. Now that you were aware of it, you saw it nearly everywhere - in their eyes, as they, too, scanned the crowd; on their lips, curled in half-smiles; on the very countenance of their bodies. They could all tell something - or rather, someone - was missing that night.

“We were hoping a party might draw him out,” joined Thatch. “The plan was to get some booze in him, and hope it’ll loosen him up enough to tell us what’s wrong - how we can help. But, as you can see…”

“He didn’t show,” finished Marco.

“He never showed up,” you said simultaneously.

“Yup…But!” he added with excitement, and you saw a smile creep on Marco’s face as he turned to look at you once more.

“We got one more thing we’d like to try.”

“Ah, and that is where I come in, I presume?” You turned to look at them, swirling your drink, as you waited for them to continue.

“Yep,” they confirmed in unison, before Marco proceeded to explain. “See, we found him sulking alone on the quarterdeck. Seems he came out for the booze, but didn’t stick around for the company.”

“Ouch! Well, that’s flattering,” you remarked jokingly, knowing full well it was nothing personal.

“Yeah, well, he won’t talk to us,” explained Thatch.

“Yep, we’re clearly part of the ‘company’ he seems to be avoiding… Which brings us to your part.”

“Ah, I get it. You want me to go up there, and see if I fare any better than you two.”

Thatch was smiling, while Marco chuckled at your deduction, giving you a small smirk.

“No,” he answered, “we know you’ll fare better than us.” The small, lopsided grin on Marco’s face made you cock an eyebrow for an instant, but you quickly brushed it off, as Thatch joined in once more.

“Yeah, we know you two are close. Hell, no one’s closer to him than you, except maybe his brothers,” added Thatch, matter-of-factly.

“So, what we want from you is to go up there and bring him back to Earth.”

You looked at them - they clearly cared about him, and were now resting their hopes on you, giving you a chance to help. They were giving you a chance to speak to him alone about whatever it is that’s been bothering him, just the way you’d told yourself you’d do. You glanced at your drink, swirling it around some more. Thatch’s words about how close you and Ace were made you feel warm inside. Maybe there was hope for you yet… But now was not the time for that. Snapping out of your thoughts, you looked up at your fellow conspirators.

“Leave it to me!” you declared, shooting them a grin.

“I knew we could count on you,” cheered Thatch, with a big smile, while Marco kept on his usual lazy smirk, giving you a small nod. They refilled your drink, and shoved a beer for Ace in your hands, before ushering you to the quarterdeck.

You took a deep breath trying to calm your nerves, before you strutted off, shouting over your shoulder “Wish me luck!”

“Good luck!” the guys responded, as you disappeared behind a corner.

It was a warm night, and the skies were clear, revealing a veritable sea of stars above your head, complete with a bright full moon, and with nary a cloud in sight. The music from the party was fading as you walked further and further away, towards the quarterdeck; its spritely rhythms now barely enough to muffle the clicking sound of your footsteps on the wooden planks.

Indeed, way in the back, hidden out of sight, was Ace. Slumped on the deck, with his back resting against a wall, a couple of empty beers around him, and one bottle hanging by the neck in his hand. His head tilted upwards, his eyes fixed on the stars above him. He seemed so calm, so quiet, and yet, not serene in the slightest. It was as if the silent sorrow in his soul crept its way towards you, and took you by the hand, when his eyes suddenly turned to you. A smile made its way onto his lips, but failed to reach his tired eyes. ‘Had he been crying?’

“Hey, Y/N! What are you doing here?” Ace tried to act cheerful, and play pretend; he tried to hide his expression by finishing his drink, but you knew him far too well for that, and saw right through his act.

“I heard you were out here,” you confessed as you went to sit down by his side, handing him the beer. “I haven’t seen you in a while,” you continued, as Ace took the bottle from your hand, “and I missed you. We’ve all been missing you.” You spoke softly, your voice barely above the sounds surrounding you - the music, the clamour from the main deck, with the clanging of beer-filled mugs, and the familiar sounds of waves splashing rhythmically against the sides of the ship. Ace averted his gaze from you, lest you saw the truth in his eyes. But you already knew. You’ve seen it the moment he looked your way.

Shuffling around a bit, you shifted position, and made yourself more comfortable against the wall, by his side. You allowed a moment to pass in silence, not intending to come off too forcefully, as you both watched the stars twinkling above your heads. You took a sip of your drink. The sloshing of liquid punctuated the silence before you spoke.

“Care you tell me what’s got you so down? Hm?” you questioned, as gently as you could. Slowly, you turned your head towards him, giving him a side-look, and a soft, half-hearted smile as you waited for his response.

Ace pulled his knees up to his chest, and wrapped his arms around them; the bottle you’d given him still hanging in his hand. He thought he hid it better than that, even from you. But he should have known you’d see right through, and if he were being honest with himself, deep down, he was glad you did. He needed you to pull him out of the spiralling nightmares that had become his thoughts. But that didn’t make it any easier to get the words out.

Ace rested his chin on his arms, staring straight ahead, at nothing in particular, as his mind scampered to string words together. Though his mouth was hidden behind one of his arms, you could see he was working on an answer by the frown that weighed on his brow. A few moments passed in silence before you placed your hand on his shoulder blade, gently rubbing his back. His eyes darted up to yours, his mouth hanging ever so slightly open, before closing it again, and averting his gaze once more. The warmth of your hand on his skin was comforting, safe, inviting; inviting him to tell you of his woes.

“I’m sorry,” he says quietly, his voice barely above a whisper, barely audible over the commotion of the party on the main deck.

“What for?”

“For making you worry… You, and Marco, and Thatch, and Izou, and Pops, and all the others…I’m sorry for shutting you all out these past few days… weeks. I’m just…” Ace paused for a moment, as he turned his head away from you again, and fixed his eyes on the swaying waves before him. “I… haven’t been myself lately, is all.”

“Ace, it’s alright. We’ve all got our darker days. It’s - “

Ace draws a shaky breath, before cutting you off. “I know it’s not fit for a commander - t’ give in like that, and shut you all out. I should have done better… You all deserve better…”

The hand that was rubbing his back froze in place, as you stared at him in shock - eyes wide, and slack jawed - struggling to believe the words you were hearing. Seeing Ace crumbling down like this certainly struck a chord. You and Ace were close, but this was a side of him you’d never seen before. Was this the same daredevil you’d grown so used to over time? Sure, you were aware that he wasn’t always that same cocky bastard. You knew he had a softer side too, and you knew he was damaged too. You knew that he struggled with his past - his ancestry, especially - wondering if he really deserved to be where he was, and be loved as he was. Sometimes he’d wondered if maybe he could have done more for Luffy - if he was a good older brother. Other times he wondered if he was doing right by Pops, and the other Whitebeards. You knew all of this, and then some. But you’d never seen him so broken before. How long had he been carrying this stone around his neck? At a loss of words, all you could do was stare at him - lips trembling as you tried to form words; throat tightening, as you tried to hold back tears.

“I’m sorry you’re missing out on the party to sit here with me,” he continued, “but I also wanna say thank you. Thank you for your time, and thank you for your company.” He adjusted his sitting position, stretching out the leg nearest to you and allowing it to bend to the side, as his arm hung over his bent knee. “I hope you know how much I value your friendship… despite the past couple of weeks… And thanks for the drink too,” he chuckles, a bittersweet smile on his face as he takes a swig, before quickly resuming his monologue. “And thank Marco and Thatch too for trying to cheer me up. I don’t know what I ever did to deserve you guys. Y'all deserve better than someone like me,” he trailed off. His head briefly dipped down against his arm, before he quickly lifted it up, and tilted it back against the wall. It was as if he were afraid that if he allowed his head to hang like that he might break down, and cry. His lips curled, and trembled with a bittersweet smile. You watched as his brows furrowed, and the corners of his mouth twitched, before he covered his eyes with his hand. From his shaking lips came a sound hard to pinpoint. Was it a sob? A scoff? A chortle? Whatever it was, it clearly captured his inner turmoil.

Seeing him like this disarmed you completely. You gawked at him for a moment longer, unaware that large, warm tears had started spilling from your eyes, down your cheeks, and down your neck. You watched him shake his head, as if in disbelief of the situation too - in disbelief of the things he’s said, in disbelief of having allowed someone to see him like that.

The shock still prevented you from forming proper sentences, but you could no longer sit by silently. “Ace…”

Hearing his name carried on a breathy whisper snaps him out of his spiral, and pulls his attention towards you. Ace hardly had time to register the pained look on your tear-stained face, before you cupped his cheeks in your hands, and pressed your lips against him. You squeezed your eyes shut, forcing out the tears past your lashes. The kiss felt hot, with a thick blend of love, and pain; with all the laden words that have spilt, and all those that would not come; with all emotions that you both had been trying to hide. It wasn’t long before you slowly pulled away from him, keeping his face between your palms. The kiss may not have lasted long, but it was enough to get him to shut up, and cease his self-deprecatory verbiage, if only for a moment. You took a moment to scan the shocked, flustered expression on his freckled face before speaking.

“I’ll decide what I deserve,” you stated, finally letting go of his face.

You watched as Ace, who seemed perfectly stupefied by your little stunt, attempted - and failed - to pull his wits about him.

“Did… Did you just kiss me?” He looked cute as a button as he pointed at himself, confused, as if trying to comprehend his own question. You chuckled at his reaction.

“Was I not supposed to?” You may have chuckled at his reaction, but the truth is that you did it on an impulse, and now the reality of it all was setting in for you too. You’d had a crush on him for ages now, and never in a million years would you have imagined things going this way. But what’s done is done, and this was the moment of truth. Every moment it took for him to answer felt like an eternity, as you kept wondering - What was he going to do? What was he going to say? You couldn’t help but avert your eyes from his, as you felt a blush creep onto your face. You cursed the full moon for its glow so bright, for you were nearly sure Ace could see the deep pink darkening your cheeks.

“I don’t know, but… Can you do it again?”

Looking up, you found Ace watching you, expectantly, with a soft, albeit nervous, smile, and a blush to rival your own.

“Yeah… Yeah, I’d say you deserve some more.”

#portgas d ace x reader #one piece #portgas d ace #portgas d ace comfort #moth fics #moth writes #ace x reader #portgas d. ace x reader #Ace struggles with self-worth issues #portgas d. ace #ace one piece #friends to lovers #hurt/comfort #mild hurt/comfort

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anystalker707 · 1 year

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Do I have a chance?

Pairing: Portgas D. Ace x [gender neutral] Reader Words: ~ 1 600 Summary: Ace is just trying to get you to like him. Tags: he's so. ace. / Marco just sits back and eats popcorn while watching it happen

Requested by anon [Hi! Could I request male reader X Ace where Ace is nice and adorable with everyone except reader? Ace is not toxic or mean to Reader, he just acts more serious and tough around him (...)]

MASTERLIST

Your eyes observed Ace in the distance as he talked with the others. He would often giggle, showing that wide smile that made your heart flutter as he opened that wide smile. Sometimes he would joke about something, playing offended and being way too dramatic, and it was also way too cute when he randomly fell asleep. Only you knew how hard it was not to just reach out and ruffle his hair, play with his messy black strands, maybe squish his cheeks together, and kiss all over his freckles…

All of it was to be appreciated just by far, though. Marco and the others were so lucky.

“Ah, hey, (y/n),” Ace mumbled with a light wave as he approached when you sat at one of the tables on Moby Dick’s with a book in hand. “I was wondering, could you help me with some bandages? It’s kinda tricky to clean the wounds.” He pointed to the bandage on his shoulder. He didn’t smile. Okay. It was so awkward when Ace did that. It felt like he was annoyed by you.

“Sure.” You grabbed the marker and slipped it into the book before closing it. His eyes glanced down at it.

“What book is that?” Ace blinked as he observed you set it aside.

You raised an eyebrow, looking at it for a moment, and hummed. “Ah, it’s just something I grabbed from Marco.” You took the book while standing up, observing the cover for a moment. Ace always asked you about the stuff you read or watched, so you just told him about it before he asked. “It’s about a king who searches for the fragments of his dead wife’s soul. He’s the main character, along with a guy and a girl. This other guy is so cool. He’s stoic, y’know, all serious and tough. Very cool character. The king is way too dramatic.”

Despite your grin, Ace only raised an eyebrow in brief interest and nodded with a hum. “Oh, great. Sounds cool.”

Why did he always make things awkward?

You nodded with a hum. “Either way, I’m going to put it away. Where do you want to change your bandages—”

“Your cabin?” Ace said almost instantly. You blinked a couple of times before slowly nodding, and he exhaled softly. “Then let’s go.”

Ace was terribly quiet during all of that. He was serious, not reacting so much to your jokes and barely keeping the subjects going, so you just opted for silence. If he really disliked you, you didn’t want to keep bothering him. Even so; if he disliked you, why did he insist on always trying to be around you? You’d questioned Marco about that a couple of times, but all he did was scoff and chuckle in response.

You did favors to Ace once in a while, yeah—you two were close crewmates at the beginning—, and that was never the issue, just that he didn’t even thank you this time. Ace just walked out of the cabin before you could finish speaking, leaving his button-up on your bed.

Ace had sort of told Marco his plans. Marco didn’t agree at all, but he also knew he wouldn’t be able to convince someone with a thick head like Ace, so he didn’t even try too much. Honestly, Marco couldn’t even wonder how you were feeling with all this mess because he would often catch you gazing at Ace with those dreamy eyes.

One of the things that went through Marco’s head was certainly about the amount of functioning brain cells inside Ace’s head. If Ace was too shy to confess to you, maybe he should try some tactic that didn’t involve making you fall for him and confessing to him instead. Or just anything that involved Ace being Ace instead of someone who clearly didn’t please you.

As far as Marco could remember, it started when Ace wanted to find things to talk about with you, and the fact you were around reading a few books made it easy for Ace to figure out two things to chat about: what kind of stuff you liked, and also what your type was, hopefully. Marco could remember Ace ranting to him about how you loved all the serious and Stoic characters from those books, admiring their coolness. It was a matter of time until Ace was changing into that said demeanor whenever around you, but his attempts at being serious honestly just made Marco want to hide due to the second-hand shame. Ace was so stupid. He was like a weird kid.

On the other hand, Marco also wanted to strangle Ace to make him confess to you already. He noticed that most of the crew was dispersed now that you stopped by an island. You were sitting alone at one of the tables on the main deck, reading your book.

“Oi, Ace-yoi,” Marco caught Ace’s attention. “I’m going ahead to the shop, so can you tell (y/n) I’ll already be there?” He didn’t actually wait for Ace to answer before he left, waving back at Ace with his other hand stuck in his pocket.

Damn, Marco. He could’ve at least told Ace something about that before. At the moment, he wasn’t fucking prepared to talk with you. Ace’s mind was racing as he looked back and saw you there, nose buried in that same book from the other day. You were the only one there aside from an occasional pirate that would walk by, which wasn’t even relevant. Marco really hated him, didn’t he?

Ace cleaned his throat and tried to seem cool as he walked over to the area where you were, hands in his pockets. He could do it. He was going to do it so well that maybe you’d confess to him today. The same things went over and over in his mind as he leaned back against the wall, letting his hat cover his face lightly. You probably were sleeping hugging the shirt that he left in your room. He probably looked so cool. He was so cool.

… Well, why didn’t you approach him, then? What was taking you so long?

You had noticed Ace’s presence there, of course—how could you not? It wasn’t even the first time he saw you after the day you fixed his bandages, but you still wished that Ace would finally come to thank you or ask for his shirt back. Despite having your eyes glued to the page, you weren’t reading a thing. You couldn’t read a thing.

This was already getting on your nerves. Did Ace think he was better than anyone? Did Ace hate you?

Ace jumped when the book was suddenly tossed at him. He gasped as he caught it before it fell to the ground, holding it tightly in his hands.

“What’s wrong with you?” You stood there, pointing at Ace accusingly. He had wide eyes, mouth opening and closing as he tried to say something, but it never came. You groaned, clenching your hands into fists and stepping towards him. “I get it that you don’t like me, but I don’t see the reason you keep hanging around! If I annoy you so much, then just avoid me, and I’ll return the favor!” You sighed, pinching the bridge of your nose as you took a moment; the dumbass just stood there tensely, face red. “Look, you could’ve at least acknowledged that I cleaned your wounds and taken your shirt back!”

Ace finally managed to choke something out. “But I don’t hate you!” His voice sounded weaker than he planned. Shit, he was making a fool of himself in front of you again. He groaned, looking at the book and slipping it in his pocket, not knowing what to do with it.

“You don’t have to lie, Ace!”

“I’m not lying!” Ace groaned as he pulled his hat over his face to hide it. “Ahh, I fucked it all up… I’m so sorry, (y/n)!”

A sigh escaped your lips. “Ace, it’s okay, really. You’re not obligated to like me or anything.”

Ace lowered his hat enough to look at you over the brim of it. He stuttered a couple of times but decided to take a pause—he took a deep breath, closing his eyes for a moment. “Look, I’m so sorry. I actually like you a lot.”

You furrowed your eyebrows, eyeing Ace up and down. “What do you even mean by that? Like me? Ace—”

“I was trying to be like those characters you talk about! From the books, I mean.” Ace sighed in frustration. He adjusted his hat, letting it hang over his back. “I thought you’d like me more if I did it.”

“Ace…” You sighed, burying your face in your hands and then rubbing your temples. Now all the hints that Marco dropped were starting to make sense. “Okay. Terrible choice, actually, because I like it when you’re being yourself.” Ace furrowed his eyebrows, so you nodded more. “I’m always hoping you’ll be silly and playful when you’re around me because it’s so cute.” Your cheeks reddened as you confessed it, but there was no other way to fix things without talking it out, even more after a misunderstanding going on for so long. “Just be yourself, Ace. I actually like you a lot, as well.”

Ace was pouting a little, his cheeks all red. “Can I hug you, (y/n)? Pretty please?”

A chuckle escaped your lips as you felt your face heating up as well. “Yeah, yeah, I—”

He was in your arms before you could finish saying it, hugging you tightly. “I’m sorry, okay? I won’t do it again.”

“Yeah, you better.” You patted his back lightly with a sigh.

“You know,” Ace chuckled a little bit as he pulled back; his cheeks were redder as he looked away. “Do I, y’know, do I have a chance with you now that I’m being the way you like me?”

You raised an eyebrow and slowly grinned wide. “Hmm, I’ll think about it,” you teased a little, kissing his cheek.

.𓆝 𓆟 𓆞 𓆝 𓆟.

#one piece #portgas d ace #x male reader #x demale reader #gender neutral #portgas d ace x reader #ace x reader #one piece x reader #oneshot #writing #fan fic #fan fiction

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nightingaelic · 8 months

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Things that are Now Fallout Canon

(according to the Special LIVE Report from Galaxy News that preceded the Fallout TV series' teaser trailer release on December 2, 2023)

Vault 33, the focus vault of the Fallout television series, is located beneath Santa Monica, California. It's also implied to be very, very expensive to get into.

Bottle and Cappy, the mascots for Nuka-Cola and its theme park, Nuka-World, were about to embark on a seventeen-movie-long series of animated films before the bombs fell.

The sinking of the RMS Titanic happened in Fallout's alternate universe. The news announcer jokes about the world going down like the infamous ship, including the deadly lack of lifeboats.

Camels exist in this universe, too! The news announcer actually fucks this one up, because he says dromedary camels have two humps - dromedary camels have one hump, while Bactrian camels have two. Or maybe we'll get a sound bite from Todd Howard in a few months where he claims the camel breed names are swapped in Fallout, who knows.

Pets were not allowed in the commercially-advertised vaults. The news announcer regrettably informs listeners that they can't bring their cats, dogs, or even fish with them due to logistical concerns and safety hazards, but they are more than welcome to purchase Vault-Tec-branded gravestones and hold pet funerals before they move underground. Hypothetically-speaking, it wouldn't surprise me if people tried to smuggle their animals in, anyway.

Someone stole the Fallout universe's original moon landing flag from the Museum of Technology in Washington, D.C. - another headline report, with no further details. It was in the same exhibit as the Virgo II lunar lander, which stayed put for at least 200 years.

Vault Boy was named "World's Sexiest Man" in 2077 (when the report is being aired) - no word about which publication or organization bestowed this title upon an animated mascot.

Vault-Tec trademarked the thumbs-up emoji in the Fallout universe - which is very much in character for the company, but something about there being emojis in the world at all hit me wrong.

Vault-Tec instituted a "breeder search program" alongside vault placement purchases, and encouraged polyamory to get people to procreate (and buy more vault spots). I'll admit that this one seems plausible but shaky, because by this point in the report the news announcer is losing his mind while stalling for the vault door to open, and he might just be making shit up.

Nuka-Cola ran its own version of the Pizza Hut "BOOK IT!" reading program, called "ZAP IT!" Kids were required to read over 10,000 books to win rewards. If we use picture books for the math, and allow for five minutes to read each book, that's about 833 hours (34 straight days) of reading to get some soda.

Moby-Dick by Herman Melville and the ancient Greek myth of Daedalus and Icarus both exist in the Fallout universe.

Resulting Thoughts

"The ghoul" in the show is possibly named Howard - unsure if that's a first or last name. In the teaser trailer, Walton Goggins (who plays the ghoul) is shown dressed like a Hollywood cowboy on the day of the Great War, riding a horse to try to escape the nuclear bombs that hit Los Angeles with an unidentified child. Meanwhile, the Galaxy News headlines report that a box office hit called "The Man From Deadhorse" is getting a sequel, which is currently filming at California Crest Studios, and the news announcer says the film is "Howard-led." Whether the ghoul is the lead actor, we don't know, but it seems like a solid enough hint at his origins.

I'm glad that the show is going to delve more into the idea of the haves and have-nots, what with vault entrance being both selective and expensive. The most recent games in the series don't talk about this enough, in my opinion.

This isn't specific to the show adaptation, but it's becoming more noticeable to me that the Fallout series is crawling forward in terms of relating to modernity. I'm not sure how to feel about this - for example, I don't really mind if the soundtrack of Fallout 76 features the Beach Boys and other 1960s songs when it used to be strictly limited to 1930s and 40s music. On the other hand, I thought that using a news announcer that sounds more like a modern podcast host than a Transatlantic-accented journalist was an odd choice, and as I said above, I really did not like the idea that pre-war America knows what an emoji is. I'll get over it, but I'm anticipating that there will be some more artistic choices in the adaptation (and future games) that rub me and others the wrong way because they don't fit our definition of what Fallout "is." I'm not saying anything new, people have been arguing about that forever.

Overall, I'm excited. We're probably not getting a new Fallout game until 2030, so I might as well try to enjoy this. I will be keeping my bingo cards handy, though.

Anyway, I transcribed the damn report because I'm very normal. Feel free to use!

Fallout - A Special LIVE Report from Galaxy News

with occasional commentary from yours truly

[An upbeat, strings-led orchestral jingle plays, and black-and-white picture focuses on a spinning, silver globe. The globe is being circled by a vintage toy rocket. The words "GALAXY NEWS" fly in, and are quickly wiped and replaced by script declaring "Vault-Tec Presents..." The picture is circle-wiped and transitions to a high view of a vault entrance, with no visible script or markings to indicate which vault it is. The large, circular vault door is closed, and the access bridge to the door is not connected. A timer counting down from 60 minutes is overlaid in the bottom left corner, just above the Galaxy News globe logo and a signal tower graphic next to the word "LIVE." News headlines scroll along the bottom of the screen, the first of which reads "GALAXY NEWS SIGNS 10-YEAR PARTNERSHIP DEAL WITH VAULT-TEC." The headlines are separated by small lightning bolt graphics. The music continues throughout, and a male news announcer's voice cuts in.]

Good morning! Or, afternoon! Or evening, depending on where in the world you are. If you're just tuning in with us now, you're in for a treat. Welcome to the unveiling of Vault 33, one of the flagship vaults of Vault-Tec's arsenal of vaults.

[The second scrolling headline reads "VAULT-TEC VOTED AMERICAN COMPANY WITH BRIGHTEST FUTURE."]

Galaxy News is here live with an exclusive look at the next generation of apocalypse-proof, purpose-built luxury housing, sponsored by our friends at Vault-Tec. Vault-Tec: Revolutionizing safety for an uncertain future.

[The third scrolling headline reads "ROBCO INTERPLANETARY PROBE PROBES DEEPER INTO SPACE THAN ANY PROBE HAS PROBED BEFORE."]

If you're a regular viewer of our programming, we consider you an astute, engaged citizen, doing your part to stay informed on the latest news impacting this beautiful country of ours, and so it will be no surprise to you that we are on the precipice of a nuclear armageddon. But, fear not, Vault-Tec is building the ultimate shelter-in-place solution for the more doomsday-savvy customer: A veritable ark meticulously designed to weather the geopolitical storm surely headed our way any day now. And for the first time on live broadcast, the fine folks at Vault-Tec will be giving you a tour of their newest product unveiling, from the comfort of your home.

[The announcer takes a break, and the music swells. The vault remains closed, and no activity whatsoever is visible around it. It might as well be a static image. The fourth scrolling headline reads "NUKA-WORLD BREAKS ATTENDANCE RECORD FOR FOURTH STRAIGHT YEAR. GALACTIC ZONE GIVEN CREDIT FOR INCREASED NUMBERS." The initial song ends, and a new strings song with a more staccato rhythm begins. The news announcer returns.]

Welcome, once again, to Vault 33, nestled in the coastal west side of sunny Los Angeles County, and minutes from the yet-to-be-destroyed, bustling downtown promenade. Should nuclear annihilation one day come for this quiet beach-side town, you can take comfort in knowing you are safely buried deep, deep below what numerous trade publications once called "one of the best places to live." Right now, ladies and gentlemen, what you're looking at is peace of mind. Billions and billions of dollars and decades of R&D funneled into the high-grade protection engineering that only Vault-Tec can bring you.

[The fifth scrolling headline reads "WE ASKED OUR VIEWERS TO ANSWER A SIMPLE QUESTION: WHAT IS THE GREATEST NATION ON EARTH AND WHY IS IT AMERICA? HEAR THE RESULTS TONIGHT AT 10PM EST." At this point, the news announcer starts to sound less formal and more excited.]

Aren't we a bunch of lucky ducks! Vault-Tec has tapped us into their closed loop security feed to bring you a sneak peek behind a vault entrance airlock. That large, fortified steel blast door you see there is the only thing standing between you and the rads.

[The sixth scrolling headline reads "UNITED STATES AGAIN ACCUSED OF ATMOSPHERIC COUNTER-ESPIONAGE BY THE REDS."]

Very soon - very soon, I'm told - Arnold? Are we - yeah - and we're very soon, and we're very soon. Very, very soon, I'm told, that gear door will open, and Galaxy News will be on the ground to give you all a walking tour of the facilities! Including the accommodations one might expect in a state-of-the-art, modern residence thanks to a partnership with RobCo Industries and some of your shelf-stable forever favorites like BlamCo and Sugar Bombs! There's nowhere to hide from explosive good taste! Boom!

[The news announcer disappears again, and the strings conclude and are replaced with a meandering clarinet-led number. Several scrolling headlines go by: "U.S. RENEWS DEFENSE CONTRACT WITH WEST TEK, HERALDS VALUE OF POWER ARMOR IN ALL THEATERS OF WAR." "ESPIONAGE THREAT SUBDUED IN DOMESTIC URANIUM MINES." "PRESIDENT DECLARES NUCLEAR STOCKPILE 'SAFE ENOUGH.'" "BULLETIN OF THE ATOMIC SCIENCES SETS DOOMSDAY CLOCK TO HALF A NANOSECOND TO MIDNIGHT." "ATLAS OBSERVATORY CHRISTENS NEW TELESCOPE, RE-COMMITTING TO A NON-VIOLENT PURSUIT OF KNOWLEDGE." The song ends, a new one begins, and the news announcer returns. The vault still hasn't opened, and he's dropped what was left of his professional tone.]

And we are... stalled out. We're still... having technical difficulties. You know, sometimes things go bad and there's just no way you can plan. It's kind of like what's happening with the world right now, there's no way you could've been born into the world and know how you were going to end - know how the world would end. How will the world end, in fire or in ice? Well, it turns out -

[laughter]

It turns out it's gonna be fire...

[The twelfth scrolling headline reads "CHRISTMAS TOY TRENDS: RETAILERS REPORT SHORTAGE OF POWER ARMOR FIGURINES."]

Arnold! What's that? Okay. Yes.

[sound of paper pages being flipped through]

Okay. Arnold just handed me a fun fact. We're gonna do fun facts, fun facts.

[The thirteenth scrolling headline reads "NUKA-COLA QUANTUM GETS FDA APPROVAL, FOUND TO CONTAIN 'HEALTHY AMOUNT OF RADIATION."]

Fun fact about the construction of these massive vaults: They use concrete. Hm. That hardly counts as a fun fact, Arnold. Now is there an update on when the door... the door's gonna be open? Arnold? I'm sorry, is there an update on the door? Is there an update on the crane? Is it a crane problem, or a door problem? Is it a pr- is it a crane problem, or a door problem? Arnold? Arnold! Arnie!

[sigh]

Okay...

[The news announcer gives up, and a song with a lot of muted trumpet comes in to serenade more scrolling headlines. "NO ONE'S BEATING THIS DEADHORSE. 'THE MAN FROM DEADHORSE' TOPS BOX OFFICE. A SEQUEL IS ALREADY IN THE WORKS AT CALIFORNIA CREST STUDIOS." "ATLAS WEATHER EXPERIMENT BELIEVED TO BE THE CAUSE OF UNEXPECTED SNOW FLURRY IN LOS ANGELES." "DEVELOPING: REDS CONTINUES TO DENY EXISTENCE OF STEALTH SUBMARINES, US INTELLIGENCE SUGGESTS OTHERWISE." Woodwinds replace the trumpet, and the news announcer returns, pivoting to an unrehearsed sales pitch for his sponsor.]

If you have the money, please - please, guys - get a Vault-Tec vault. Get in there! Think of it as a life raft, a bit. Our country is the Titanic, and these vaults are the life rafts - right? - attached to the side of it.

[The seventeenth scrolling headline reads "NUKA-COLA MASCOTS 'BOTTLE AND CAPPY' TO APPEAR IN ANIMATED FILM FROM CALIFORNIA CREST STUDIOS. WILL BE THE FIRST IN A SEVENTEEN PICTURE DEAL BETWEEN THE COMPANIES."]

Now, were there enough life rafts on the Titanic? If you remember - no, no there weren't enough, and so many, many people died, and so, it's a nice allegory actually, because they're not going to die in the freezing ocean, which would be - actually, it's a little faster to die by fire than it is by drowning in the cold, so it is kind of an advantage to be dying now, th- rather than on the Titanic, the RMS Titanic.

[The eighteenth scrolling headline reads "SUPPLY LINES FOR RED FORCES BREAKING DOWN." Sort of like this announcer. He pivots again.]

Now - can you call a survivor of a nuclear holocaust a person, anymore? I don't know. Their brain is going to be cottage cheese, and they will be crawling... crawling on the ground, stuffing sand in their mouth, their blind eyes melted out, like the white of an egg, just dripping and dribbling out of their eye sockets.

[The nineteenth scrolling headline reads "VAULT-TEC ANNOUNCES COMPLETION OF VAULT 33 UNDER SANTA MONICA, CA."]

They raise their face towards their... god... and scream, "Nooooo! Whyyyyyy! What did it all mean?" It turns out it didn't mean much if you didn't get a spot in a Vault-Tec vault."

[The twentieth scrolling headline reads "MILITARY UNITS SENT TO QUELL UNREST IN SEVERAL STATES."]

"Now, let's talk about the luxury interiors of Vault-Tec vaults. We have camel leather. You've heard of cow leather. Probably. Camel leather is a great deal softer, isn't it? It comes from the camel, who keep their water on their backs in a hump. Sometimes two, if they're a dromedary. Now, let's talk about camel leather and why it is more supple, and why it is cooler to the touch, and we can talk about it forever but what you want is luxury, what you need is safety: Where you go is Vault-Tec. That's it.

[I feel like I need to point out that dromedary camels only have one hump, and no camels store water in their humps: It's actually just fat up there that they can live off of while traversing deserts. Regardless, the announcer is gone again. The scrolling headlines remain. "NUKA CORP SPINS OFF ATOMIC RESEARCH ARM INTO SEPARATE CORPORATE ENTITY AFTER SEC APPROV." "SUPER DUPER MART ANNOUNCES RECALL OF BLAMCO MAC & CHEESE FOR TRACE AMOUNTS OF DAIRY." "VAULT-TEC STOCKS SOAR AS US ECONOMY BECOMES FEAR-BASED." "BUREAU OF ALCOHOL, TOBACCO, FIREARMS AND LASERS TAKE DOWN NATIONWIDE WEAPONS SMUGGLING RING." Another woodwind-heavy song starts up, and so does our announcer.]

Um... Arnold?

[throat clearing]

Arnie! Can we- do- do we have a- can we start a clock? Can we - is there, like, anything we can do? I feel like people need something to hold onto, there's a lot of empty air. There's a lot of dead air, here. People need something to hold onto, people are freaking out, and I'm freaking out because I like to have - I like to bring people comfort - uh, in, in this crazy time. There's, there's only a few things you can predict -

[laughter]

In - in the world, and uh, I thought that opening the vault on time would be one of those things.

[The twenty-fifth scrolling headline reads "MILITARY SETS THREAT LEVEL OF POSSIBLE BIOLOGICAL WEAPON ATTACK FROM REDS TO HIGH."]

I was kind of counting on it as a - a thing that would bring some amount of normalcy, some amount of comfort. Something happening the way it's supposed to in a world that feels like it has been turned upside down by evil. But, unfortunately that is not the case. Here we are. Another thing we don't know. Another thing we have to grapple with.

[The twenty-sixth scrolling headline reads "TEDDY FEAR MANUFACTURER SETTLES CLASS ACTION LAWSUIT, DENIES TOY BEAR CAUSES SLEEP PARALYSIS NIGHTMARES IN CHILDREN."]

This particular vault and these technical difficulties that we're having right now have absolutely nothing to do with the product that you will buy when you buy a Vault-Tec vault. Now, Vault-Tec vault living is living the dream, and it's the only way to safety unless you're... the President of the United States, or something like that, and you have a mountain in Colorado to go under and direct the events of the world. Not many of us are that, there's only one of those... uh, and his various and sundry advisors, I'm sure they'll be fine, but you won't! You won't be fine!

[The twenty-seventh scrolling headline reads "WERE TEDDY FEAR BEARS MISUNDERSTOOD? ONE PSYCHOLOGIST THINKS SO."]

If a vault is out of your price range, there are lower-cost alternatives to purchasing a spot with Vault-Tec. They don't sound... good, if you ask me. Anti-radiation pills? Good luck with that. Not sure how anti-radiation pills will hold up against temperatures rivaling the surface of the sun, for example. But maybe that's just me!

[He's gone again. We're 15 minutes into the countdown, and the woodwinds have really started to outdo their own whimsy, at this point. Headlines continue. "TEDDY FEARS SKYROCKET IN POPULARITY AND PRICE DUE TO SCARCITY CAUSED BY RECALL." "VAULT-TEC ANNOUNCES NEWLY AVAILABLE SINGLE VAULT SPACES FOR SALE." "THIS YEAR'S FALLOUT SUIT DESIGN FEATURES ENHANCED PROTECTION, 20% MORE ZIPPERS." The whimsical woodwinds finish up and a bouncy, brassy horn piece takes over. This summons the announcer.]

When you see that vault, it's all gonna be worth it, fellas. It's all gonna be worth it when you see that vault. Now kids, you're probably wondering: Can I bring my pet doggy, or my pet kitty, into the vault? You can't. Unfortunately... it's a hazard in so many different ways. Uh... tch, uh, their hair can get caught in the ventilation system, you'll have endless problems, where do you put their waste? Where do you put... their food? So many, so many problems, so... we have specially-made Vault-Tec gravestones.

[The thirty-first scrolling headline reads "VIRGO II LUNAR LANDER NOW ON DISPLAY AT MUSEUM OF TECHNOLOGY IN WASHINGTON, D.C."]

We have specially-made Vault-Tec pet gravestones for your children to have many funerals for their pets before you go into your Vault-Tec vault. Memorialize your pets now with Vault-Tec mini pet gravestones! Dig a hole in the sand, put the pet in there, and put that gravestone - and it's got a space where you can write the pet's name - right before you go in the vault, no pets in the vault. Not even fish. No, not even fish.

[The thirty-second scrolling headline reads "FLAG FROM VIRGO II LUNAR LANDING STOLEN FROM MUSEUM OF TECHNOLOGY." The news announcer is really getting aggravated.]

What is happening? What is - Arnie! What is - what is happening? Okay - okay! Alright!

[The music and the headlines fill the space again. "NUKA-WORLD TO RAISE TICKET PRICES FOR UPCOMING SEASON, EXPECTING AN 'EXPLOSIVE' YEAR." "GWINNETT ANNOUNCES NEW PALE ALE SO PALE IT'S TRANSPARENT." "HAPPY NATIONAL SOCK HOP DAY!" "VAULT BOY NAMED WORLD'S SEXIEST MAN." The news announcer tries again, attempting to play up the complete inactivity happening onscreen.]

So much is happening here, we've got... the crane, as you can see, it's - it's about to be lowered, and I'm told - and I'm told... the weather. The inclement weather is - keep - I think the weather... there's a pressure cha- it needs to be - yes, of course. The pressure needs to be right to open the vault, or else the differential pressure between underground and overground will cause... a, uh... uh, the furniture to, uh...

[The thirty-seventh scrolling headline reads "VAULT-TEC REGISTERS TRADEMARK ON THE THUMBS UP EMOJI." This one made me physically recoil.]

L- Look... get a Vault-Tec vault. If you can't afford a whole vault for your family, that's fine. Buy time in a timeshare, one of our timeshares. And it's not the kind of timeshare you're going to regret, this is one that's not a scam, because you can look down at your intact body in a Vault-Tec vault and say, "Look at me! I'm whole!"

[The thirty-eighth scrolling headline reads "NUKA-COLA PATRIOTICALLY SALUTES SUCCESS OF NEWEST FLAVOR LAUNCH - NUKA-COLA VICTORY. EXCLUSIVE REDESIGN COMING NEXT YEAR WITH 'A TASTE AS SWEET AS FREEDOM.'"]

Stay whole in a Vault-Tec vault! Keep it together, meaning your corporeal form! Keep it together in a Vault-Tec vault! You'll be skipping around in a workout area, and... check out those barbells! Why not work those biceps while you're down here? What if there's an emergency, and somebody breaches your Vault-Tec vault door? Well, you're gonna want to be in shape to fight off that rageful beast!

[At this point the scrolling headlines loop back to the beginning.]

Now, is it a human? If you kill it, will its soul go to heaven or hell? Don't worry about it! Just get it out, because even its presence in your Vault-Tec vault could kill you and your entire family! These people are irradiated. It's not healthy, right? It's like putting your hand on a radiator. Don't do it.

[Music break. That vault still isn't opening. The song ends, and the news announcer clears his throat.]

We don't... have the exact scoop yet, ladies and gentlemen, so Arnie, why don't we put some music on while we wait for the skinny?

[noticeable pause]

I- I- I- I- don't know what song, put on anything, I'm dying up here.

[The next song opens with energetic trumpets that sound like they're charging through a movie theater snack stand. It's followed by a big band track that seems to re-energize the announcer.]

And, if you're just joining us, we're preparing to head inside the latest and greatest product offering from Vault-Tec. Vault 33, a pristine subterranean society purpose-built for America's best and brightest to wait out the nuclear fallout. There's no telling what will remain once this global conflict reaches its inevitable conclusion: That's why it's important for patriots like you to purchase a guaranteed spot in America's future. It's up to you to keep our golden society going, propagating forth until we have the ranks to repopulate the world outside.

"What if I don't have a partner or family right now?" you may be asking. "Don't give up on love so soon!" I say. Where better to meet eligible partners than in a cherry-picked community of like-minded individuals? If you find you need a bit more assistance, Vault-Tec has breeder search programs to help you find the one, or the two, or the three, four, five! Vault-Tec is a very open society, so go ahead and purchase that single vault space, and that single may become a double before you know it! And what better place to find someone to love, than safe underground?

Please stay tuned as we prepare to bring the crew, and the world at large, inside our Vault-Tec facility.

"But what if I don't have the money for a vault right now?" you may be thinking. You should never let not having the funds today stop you from reaching your dreams. You can always pay tomorrow, into perpetuity. Vault-Tec is reportedly constructing financial packages that allow for customers to continue payments on select economy vaults, in the event of total societal extinction. So don't worry, purchase away! Vault-Tec upholds traditional American values, and they believe no one should be excluded from the pursuit of life, liberty, and debt.

[Music break, wherein the song concludes and switches to something more pensive and staccato.]

A- Alright? Yes? Arnold is telling me - yes? We are moments away! Moments away - from having some kind of movement here. I'll believe that when I see it. Sorry Arnie, but your credibility with me could not be any lower at this point.

Let's talk about the amenities in these concrete miracles. Radiation King will be providing television sets, modern kitchen appliances.

[throat clearing]

The sofas will be... I'm sorry, do we know who makes the sofas? I'm sorry, do we - do we know who makes the sofas? Do we know who makes the sofas? Arnold, do we know who makes the sofas?

[Arnold does not reply. The announcer is miffed.]

What else is new. Yeah.

[Dejection turns to anger immediately.]

If you could please just give me something? If you could please just give me something to update? I'm sitting here with nothing! I'm sitting here... with nothing! This isn't my job! I'm a journalist! I report things, I don't... vamp! Is there even a - is, is there a clue? Is there, do the crane people - have the crane people chimed in? Have the door people chimed in? Is it all one person?

[Arnold presumably says some inaudible form of "I don't know." This does not please the news announcer.]

Well maybe con- maybe connect yourself to them. You should get yourself a radio. Get yourself a radio, Arnold. That's your job, to communicate with me the facts about what's going on, and it's my job to communicate to the people who are watching - we're trying to save their lives - you know, and this isn't advertising for me. This is a product I believe in!

Arnold, what do you do? What skills do you - are you somebody's son? Are you - are you somebody's kid, or something?

[Arnold can finally be heard, somewhat garbled from distance or technology: "My uncle is, uh, is the general manager of Galaxy News, your employer." The news announcer considers this.]

Your uncle is the manager of Galaxy New - mmm. Well, that explains how you got this internship. I'm sorry for everything I said, but... you can understand my frustration, here.

[The music concludes, but the announcer keeps going.]

The, uh, vault foreman is out here, and he is, uh, uh, doing hand signals. Ooh, yes, it's going to be a while, let's play some music for the people, Arnie.

[A new song starts. We're nearly 30 minutes into the countdown before the song switches over and the news announcer starts up again.]

All right folks, we have an update! They've got eyes on the gatekeeper out walking the grounds. It appears he was attempting to retrace his steps after misplacing the key and his wallet - still no word on the key itself, please stand by for more on the wallet, as this story continues to unfold.

Still on standby as we wait for the situation in the vault to resolve, but folks, there is plenty to get the American public up to speed on in the meantime. World news stories! Breaking, breaking news from the international desk. Peace negotiations between America and her adversaries crumbled in Anchorage, Alaska, this past weekend, a city recently liberated from foreign occupation, leading experts to believe nuclear war is indeed on the horizon. One more reason, America, to tune into the presentation Vault-Tec has for us today. Preparation, resilience, and smart spending are the only way our precious republic makes it through that long, dark night.

[This revelation approximates the date of the broadcast, which is happening not long after the Battle of Anchorage. The clash in Alaska officially ended on January 10, 2077: This news bulletin proves that attempted peace negotiations followed, then failed.]

Going the way of the dinosaurs has never felt this fun! If only the dinosaurs had Vault-Tec technology. Now, the dinosaurs died because... a meteor came from space, right? They had nothing to do with it. We have everything to do with our own demise. It's almost like… people are a virus that is destroying the Earth, we're a planet-killing virus. And people do say, "Oh, well, you know, well, the cockroaches... will outlive us and the the aardvarks or whatever will outlive us." Well, they won't. They're going to die too, because this is the real deal, guys. This is the end. So if you're not underground, I don't know what you're doing.

I wonder how we'll evolve. Will we develop a different kind of skin, some kind of leathery, plastic skin to fight off the nuclear fire? Who knows, but the only way to find out is to purchase a Vault-Tec vault, or a space in one of our timeshares.

[Music break again. It's a rather lively waltz.]

For those gathered around their Radiation King TV sets today, thank you for your patience. Rome wasn't built in a day!

[laughter]

Very soon you will witness… one of the greatest modern advances since the Virgo II moon landing - you won't want to miss this, the future of you and your future children depends on it.

[Exasperation sets in.]

Honestly, who wrote this copy?

[Arnold presumably raises his hand.]

You did, Arnold? Well, that's not surprising. It leaves… yes, well, it leaves a lot to be desired. They couldn't hire a professional writer? You look like you're 15 years old.

[Arnold inaudibly corrects him.]

You're 23? Yeah, well, 23-year-olds look like they're 15 now, still too young. What could you know about the - what could you possibly know about the written word, Arnold? Goddamn it. What could you - what do you know about writing and oratory? Nothing, I'll answer y- for you, nothing. The lack of professionalism - myself not included - disgusts me. The lack of professionalism disgusts me, Arnold!

Speaking of nuclear fire, you should see the muffin tray they left out for me. People want a blueberry mu- you want a muffin, okay? A muffin. Not a little squirt of dough, with a little powdered su- give me a muffin, give me a real thing, okay? Give me some snacks! You're going to give me some coffee? Good. I need a snack, to balance it. I'm not the only person in the world who needs a little bit of fat in their stomach when they eat a... big haul of caffeine.

[throat clearing]

Stand by as we wait for the situation in the vault to resolve.

[The music does some flourishes, then finishes.]

Ladies and gentlemen, it's official: We're experiencing some technical difficulties. And before we can open the vault - Vault 33, our flagship vault, full of the, uh, finest luxury items available to mankind, a- as of now - maybe we could put something on to keep people company while we figure out the technical difficulties. Sorry, these difficulties of course have nothing to do with Vault-Tec's vault tech. In- in- indeed…

Look, I need to have a whole cigarette right now. Just put on the song. Where are my smokes?

[The music starts up again while the announcer burns through a cigarette at the speed of a Corvega.]

Well, well, well! Here we are again! Ladies and gentlemen, we're dealing with a hiccup. Now, hiccups... might seem like a momentary stoppage, but this is a big hiccup. It's like God is hiccuping.

Vault-Tec is reporting that there's only one gatekeeper and one key on this vault model. The keys for these vaults are one of one, it fits like a glove, but it's - it's - these - these locks are very, very complicated.

God, it's so good to be on the other side of this. I don't think people know. People really don't know what's coming, and that's probably good. If you haven't watched… if you haven't watched the news up to this point, don't pick it up. Don't… just try and stay ignorant, uh, really don't find out what's going to happen because… it's bad, um, it's over.

[laughter]

The Earth is a slaughterhouse, and we are cattle!

[laughter]

We- we'll go back into, uh, a society resembling Bronze Age Mesopotamia. That's where we're going. It's not fun. Um... disease is… really prominent, um… we don't treat women well - let's just face it, it's - they - we don't treat them well now, but back then… oof. Rough. Rough treatment of women. You think we're racist now?

It's going to get bad. Where you want to be is underground. Vault-Tec vaults.

[A really tinny muted trumpet rises to its occasion as he disappears again for a bit.]

You know what else is great about Vault-Tec vaults? The air purification system. Let's talk about air. You need air to breathe, I need air to breathe, we need air to breathe. Vault-Tec's got it in spades! We've got oxygen candles straight from our finest nuclear submarines that you can burn, that turn nitrogen and carbon dioxide into oxygen molecules. Perfectly breathable, perfectly safe for your children, and your children's children, and your children's children's children in case we're there for three sweaty generations of sweaty living underground! In a fresh vault!

In fact, we put a family in a vault for 10 years and let them out just to see how it would go… and here they are now! "We loved it, uh… We loved it! That was great!" Uh… that's - I'm making it up! I'm making that up. I am imagining what could happen if I had more information about the vaults, but I don't have that information, so I'm making it up! Ha! Vault-Tec vaults, yes. Say yes to the tech!

[The music saves us for a bit.]

Unfortunately, we are back, the vault hasn't opened, and we have had absolutely no movement towards the vault opening, so! Hope you enjoyed that music. I know I was tapping my feet. Let's get back into it, where are we?

The US government has been quietly testing T-60 power armor suits as part of their long-standing defense contract with West Tek, following up the T-45 and T-51 efforts in the ongoing war with the People's Liberation Army.

[hisses through teeth]

How about that? How about that. The Man from Deadhorse gallops to a fast start at the box office! The Howard-led western is said to be the next smash for California Crest Studios.

[So the ghoul's name is probably Howard Something, or Something Howard. Interesting, but the announcer doesn't care and decides to throw another tantrum.]

Am I crazy or is this taking forever? I don't think I'm crazy, but I feel crazy! In fact, I might be the only person involved in this whole production who hasn't lost his mind! I'm looking at you, Arnie, I'm looking at you!

[Looking at Arnie yields nothing, again.]

"You don't know what to do, you don't know what to do." You idiot! I can't even get the word- I can't even get the information from you. Worthless!

[grunt of rage]

It's just me and Arnie here, I'm in hell, he's sitting there smiling at me, I'm in absolute hell!

Do you have a spot, Arnie? Do you have a spot in a vault? Oh! You do! What vault is that?

[long pause]

Oh, that's the one I'm in. Oh. Dear God.

[deep breath]

I guess we should get to know each other.

Ladies and gentlemen, we don't even know what's wrong here… but I can assure you that what isn't wrong is Vault-Tec technology, this has nothing to do with Vault-Tec's patented lock technology and everything to do with stupid people and human error. If you're this inefficient at work, what is home li- do - how do you wipe yourself?

[Uncalled-for, news announcer man.]

Ladies and gentlemen, please enjoy this music while we figure out what's going on.

[Musical break number who knows. Just over 11 minutes remain on the countdown.]

In other sponsored news, Nuka-Cola is celebrating the success of one of their newest flavor launches, Nuka-Cola Victory, with an exclusive redesign release later next year. Students that read over 10,000 books can be part of the ZAP IT! Program, rewarding literacy with sugar!

[deep breath]

I don't like Nuka-Cola. Personally... I don't like Nuka-Cola. Too sweet. I don't drink it. But it's popular, I have stocks in it, I invest - I invest in it. I don't drink it. It's the way the world is. Just because it's popular, doesn't mean it's good, just because it's good, doesn't mean it's popular. A can of Nuka-Cola, what is that, it's energy slowed down, right? It's the energy of the universe slowed down, right? What are we, what am I? We are energy slowed down into the form of a human being. All that's about to stop.

[laughter]

All that's about to stop! All that's about to go away! Maybe there's life on other planets. Maybe there's not. Are they going to come save us, no! If I were on another planet, and I came here, I would have an endless belly laugh at our folly, I mean, the folly of man! It's funny, there's so much written about the "folly of man." I mean, read Moby-Dick. Read… uh… what di- what happened with the - the wax wings, the wax wing guy? Wax wing man, Mr. Wax Wings, Daedalus. What's his name?

[Arnold hazards a guess we can hear: "Shakespeare?"]

Arnold, Shakespeare? Arnold, Arnold, good god… Shakespeare? Where did you go - you went to one of these hippie schools...

[Arnold tries again: "I think it was Icarus?" The announcer is ecstatic.]

Icarus! Icarus. Wow! You are good for something. Wow, Arnie!

Now, Icarus, he was close to the sun. In a Vault-Tec vault, you'll be as far from it as possible. You will be up to 50 feet underground, in a Vault-Tec vault, safe and sound in the knowledge that the wax on your wings will not be anywhere close to anything that will make it melt, except our new Vault-Tec oven!

[The horns come in again.]

Where are you f- what's your family situation? Do you have kids or…

[Arnold probably shakes his head.]

No kids? Good for you.

[laughter]

Are you single?

[Arnold: "Yeah."]

Ahh, yeah. I wouldn't recommend going into a vault single. You might want to lock someone down and take you in there - if only to help you fight - and, uh, survive, it's good to have a partner. Yeah… oof!

Anyway, glad I'm safe and secure in my vault! Um… I'm in the tax bracket that kind of... automatically gets a vault, so, sorry everybody. Uh… I'll be, uh, doing this thing called surviving, while you are all burning.

[deep breath]

What's the point of any of this? What's the point of any of this? Nobody - nobody listening to this can afford one of these things. Everybody listening to this is about to turn into an idea!

[laughter]

Instead of a being! But, here we are! Let's whoop it up! Let's whoop it up! It's a big parade… for the end of mankind! It's a big parade! Here's the final celebration, Arnie! Here we are!

Let's stake our claim in a dying planet! Let's plant our flag in a dead rock, and see how we feel. Let's see how we feel after the flag is planted, Arnie.

[a deep sigh]

I don't know how much longer I can do this, man.

[another deep breath]

My voice hurts, I'm thirsty, we're out of water, the muffins they laid out at the top of the day are dry and old, I feel dry and I feel old.

I give up! I give up.

[chuckles]

What's the point of this? I mean, what's the point of anything? I'm... I'm broken.

[Emotion creeps in.]

I'm broken. I'm changed. I am broken and I have changed. I…

[one more deep breath]

Thanks to you, Arnie. Thanks to you, man. Thanks, you're the best, yeah, thanks to you, pal. Thanks to you, buddy boy. You are just awful. You disgust me. Yeah, I'm just - I'm sorry. I'm - I'm just… I'm fried, man. I'm - I'm fried, pal. I'm fried. Dead. Gravestone, dead. Oh yeah, that's, okay.

Oh, god. Where are we in the process of the door opening?

[Arnold: "Yeah, it's over."]

What?

[A record scratch stops the music. Two minutes remain on the countdown.]

What's that? Oh!

[The announcer clears his throat, and the music changes to a triumphant fanfare.]

Ladies and gentlemen, I'm getting word. Ladies and gentlemen... I've gotten word that we are star- we are starting, ladies and gentlemen. It's happening! Here we are! Here we are, we got it, we got it, and now…

N- and now, this afternoon is unlike any other afternoon, ladies and gentlemen. It was the morning, now it's the afternoon - here we go! The crane is loweri- Here we go!

[relieved laughter]

Okay! Really close to the time where I can go, and get out of here! The crane is lowering, it is happening, the tumblers are tumbling! The crane is lowering, the tumblers are tumbling, we are… go! We're going! It's opening! It's opening!

[The static image of the vault has not changed in the slightest bit.]

You try doing this! You try doing this, Arnie! You try filling the time! Next time we'll switch places, Arnie, and you can try it! Oh boy, oh boy, here we go, thank god we're doing it and it's happening. I see motion, I see- I see Vault-Tec… I am convinced! Guys, this is great, it's been great, Arnie? It's been great. Arnie, it's been great. You know, I hope we are in the same vault. I'd like to spend the rest of my life with you, Arnie.

[slightly unhinged laughter]

As long as this happens right now, I am fine with spending the rest of my life with you! As long as the vault opens right now. The fact that nuclear fire could fall from the sky at any moment has made this broadcast that much more important. Thank you, thank you so much for joining us!

#fallout #fallout tv show #fotv #the ghoul #galaxy news #prime video #amazon

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xxhispieceofheavenxx · 2 years

Text

All is peachy || Regulus Black

Summary: After spending the summer hooking up with his brother's best friend, Regulus convinces himself she only wants him because she can't have Sirius. Or where Regulus masturbates with a peach but he is sad while doing so. (basically, the peach scene from call me by your name)

CW: slight angst to fluff, smut, male masturbation, oral sex (male receiving), self-dought, French!Regulus, French!Sirius, fem!reader. Let me know If I missed something.

Word count: 2.9k words

Hiii! I'm back with a Regulus one-shot. I had this in the back of my mind for a while now and I'm so glad I could write it down. I said that this fic wouldn't take me long, and it didn't because I've been writing it nonstop, but it's still the longest story I've written. With that being said I hope you enjoy it!

Request are open

Masterlist

The loud laughter makes his eyes roll as his mouth puffs out a breath. Sirius' voice is boisterous while joking around with his cousins Juliette, Lèon and Manon. It usually wouldn't bother him as much as it does today, but among his family, he can hear the sweet laughter that's been plaguing his mind for the entirety of the summer.

She's waist-deep in the water, squinted eyes as Sirius continues splashing water around the group. The sun shines bright, making her hair and skin look even more lively than usual. He should join them; the heat is almost unbearable even as he sits under the shadow of a big tree, pretending to read his worn-out copy of Moby Dick. He should be in the water enjoying his summer, but he can't, not when she's there, looking even more beautiful than he remembers ever seeing her. She's wearing a flowery bikini, her skin looking darker thanks to the sun.

When this summer started, Regulus never thought he would be in a situation like this; when Sirius told him he had invited a friend to spend the holiday with them at their summer manor in the South of France, he never thought he would end up falling for her. She was the loveliest from the moment she entered their house, even making his usually stern parents smile and comment about how Sirius had finally found a friend worth their time. It was hard not loving her sweet voice and laughter, the smell of her hair while she flung it over her shoulder, talking animatedly with his cousin Juliette, easy to make friends when they arrived at the holiday manor. He never thought he would have a chance with a woman so bright she could face the sun and still shine more, not him, not his gloomy face and grey eyes. But he was wrong about that again, and only a week into the summer, Regulus found himself kissing the woman of his dreams.

They had been drinking outside, near the lake, where they were swimming now. Regulus had gotten up to find more drinks when she, always the enthusiastic helper, offered to help him carry them back. Unsure how it happened, they were kissing in the wine cellar. Her body pushed against a wall, her legs around his waist, her finger tangled in his hair. Regulus thought it had all been a dream when he woke up with a killer headache. It became clear it wasn't when she tentatively pressed a hand to his back and gave him a knowing smile during breakfast, the kind that holds a secret only they share.

The next few weeks were spent sneaking around, tasting each other and enjoying furtive glances and touches. That was until Regulus decided she couldn't like a guy like him, not when she had Sirius around, the extrovert, the funny and witty brother. Why would she choose him over Sirius when he was everything his brother wasn't? Introverted, quiet, nose always stuck in a book, never able to defend himself or speak his mind, always afraid about what he could do wrong. That's why he has spent the last week making up excuses, looking the other way when her eyes tried to find his.

Giving up on distracting himself with his book, he closes it and gets up. Quick steps guide him inside the kitchen where house elves are busy prepping for dinner; out of the corner of his eye, he sees a basket full of ripe peaches and quickly grabs two, taking them upstairs to his room.

Tossing the book on his bed, he grabs the bottom of his flowy linen shirt and places a peach on his nightstand. He takes it off, allowing the cloth to fall to the floor. He lays down and starts taking the pit out of the peach in his hand. The sweet juice runs down his fingers all the way to his wrist; he manages to lick them up before the dops reach the bedding. Regulus grabs his book once more and becomes determined to get the girl out of his mind. He opens it on the marked page and aggressively chomps down on the peach.

After rereading the same line over ten times and finishing his peach, he accepts defeat. Closing the book, he places it on his nightstand and lays back, looking at the ceiling like it is about to give him the answer to stop his despair. He thought he had a chance, he really did, but that was just plain wishful thinking. He had seen himself as lucky all those times she had allowed him a taste of her lips or allowed him in her bed. But of course, it was just a distraction for her, so she wouldn't have to face Sirius' escapees alone. He knew it was all too good to be true. His brother was always the desired; he was the oldest, the more handsome, the charismatic and witty. He was still the same brother that had invited her and then left her alone with his family to meet his multiple summer affairs, leaving her to try and console herself with always-number-two Regulus.

He blames himself for even thinking that her touches were ever directed at him. Even if they were on his skin, he knows that in her mind there was only one man, and it wasn't him. All her kisses, caresses, moans and whispers weren't for him.

Groaning, Regulus looks down at the tent that formed in his summer shorts. Which had been happening a lot more often; whenever he remembers her and their endeavours. His hand had started failing him as well, no longer giving him enough pleasure. But after feeling how soft, wet and warm her cunt was all summer, it isn't a surprise. Another sight leaves his lips when he reaches for the forgotten peach by his bedside. Closing his eyes, he rolls the peach between his fingers. The soft skin reminds him of her, extra soft, after applying sunscreen all summer.

Regulus opens his eyes slightly, focusing his sight on the peach in his hands. His index finger starts gently caressing where the stem used to be, softly feeling the curves of the fruit. His breathing becomes slightly ragged as his thoughts continue to flow. No, he can't do that; it would be weird. Shaking his head, he stabs the top of the peach with his thumb, juices falling all over his chest and abdomen. He is quick to gather them with his fingers and lick them clean. He finally gets the pit out and sucks on it, getting as much of the flesh as he can, then he rolls it between his fingers and chucks it across the room, still upset at his thoughts.

Regulus hitches himself higher up, allowing his back to rest on the pillows. Tentatively, he brings the peach into his mouth, sucking the flesh exposed in the hole he left after taking the pit out. He nibbles and lets his tongue roam around the hole, closing his eyes and throwing his head back, only one thing on his mind. He can't help but compare her to the fruit, sweet and soft, juices wetting his lips and face as he explores it with his mouth.

He opens his eyes, knowing that he has lost the battle with his thoughts. Regulus lets one of his hands tread slowly down his body to the button of his shorts; his other brings the fruit into his underwear. Regulus bites back a moan, letting air out his nose, and pushes into the hole. He lets his eyes close again, feeling the sensations; how wet it is, how if he squishes it just a little bit, it feels like her cunt fluttering around him. Her face is clear behind his closed lids, mouth slightly open with pleasure, no noises coming out of her with how much he was making her feel. It doesn't take much more than that image to release, his semen filling the fruit in his hand.

Disgusted with his actions, he quickly places the peach on his nightstand. He casts a quick glance as his cum drips in a long, slow drop down one side and turns his back to it, ready to forget about what he has done.

Hours later, the bright sun is much duller coming in through the window. Soft steps pad through his bedroom floor until they reach the edge of his bed. A smile touches her lips as she watches Regulus lie asleep on his sheets, slack jaw, eyelashes fluttering as he dreams. She sits on the mattress, careful not to wake him up and laces her finger to his soft curls. She bends over, letting her lips place kisses all over Regulus' naked chest.

His eyes flutter open, dazed, as he watches her kiss down his abdomen, all the way to his unbuttoned shorts. Her hand reaches down, pulling his semi-hard dick out and placing it in her mouth. He sighs and looks as her face scrunches up in shock.

"What did you do?"

That is enough to fully wake him up, realising this is not a dream and she is currently inside his room sucking him off.

"Nothing." His all-too-fast answer is enough to make her look around his room, not taking long to find the peach on his nightstand.

"Oh, wow..." she says as she reaches over him for the fruit.

"Stop." Regulus sits up and tries to get it out of her grasp.

"What? No, this is very interesting." A grin takes over her face as she chuckles.

"It's nasty."

"Yes, it is." Her smile grows. She sticks her tongue out, trying to get the drop that fell off the side.

"Stop, don't do that." Regulus tries to take the fruit away again, but she quickly avoids his hand. "Seriously, stop." His hand misses hers a third time, and she tries to lick his cum off the peach again. "Just stop, please." A sob escapes his body suddenly, tears start streaming down his face.

"Reggie, what...?" Her words get lost as he bends over her, hiding his face on her lap. "What's wrong?" Her fingers tangle on his hair again, helping her concerned voice.

"I'm sorry, I'm..." He raises his head and wipes furiously at his eyes. "I'm sorry."

"No, no, I'm sorry." She lets the peach down on his other nightstand, the closest to her. "I didn't mean to upset you. I was only joking." Her concerned eyes look for his.

"I know. I'm sorry. I didn't mean to cry." His eyes refuse to meet hers.

"Reggie, what's wrong?"

"Nothing, don't worry." He sniffs and tries to get up. She grabs his wrist, making him look at her, a surprised expression on his face.

"Something is clearly wrong. Talk to me." Her gentle voice makes tears prick his eyes again. He lays back down, letting his arm cover his eyes so she cannot see them.

"I just,... I don't know." She lays down, placing her head on his shoulder, humming, letting him know he can continue. "I..., why are we doing this?"

"Doing what?"

"Kissing, making out, having sex." His arm falls down, and he stares at his ceiling once again, refusing to look at the woman on his shoulder whose eyes are boring into his face.

"You don't like it?" She whispers, voice unsure.

"I do, but do you?"

"Of course I do. I wouldn't do it if I didn't." That makes him turn his face to her.

"Do you just like the sex?" The commissures of his lips go down, threatening new tears. "Because I'm sure you can find sex somewhere else."

"What?" Her eyes search into his, hoping they will give her an answer.

"If what you enjoy is the sex, I'm sure you can find someone that is not your crush's little brother to give it to you." His voice turns slightly venomous at his words. He can't believe she is making him spell it out for her. He had enough humiliation as it is; allowing her in, thinking that he was enough for her, only to realize Sirius was the one she wanted and couldn't have.

"Wait, wow, wow, wow." She sits up, her arms moving defensively in front of her. "What are you talking about?"

His brow furrows, and he sits up on the bed as well. "You have a crush on Sirius."

"Ew, what the fuck?" She makes a disgusted expression. "Who the fuck told you that?"

"I, hm... no one?"

"Why do you think I like Sirius?"

"Because... everyone does." He looks as confused as her, not understanding her disgust and shock at the revelation.

"Who the fuck is everyone? Reggie, why would I have sex with you if I wanted Sirius?" Her frown deepens.

His mouth relaxes open, confused sound spill out while his eyes look around the room, trying to find an answer. She doesn't...? But all those looks she sent Sirius' way, they coy smiles and jokes between them. They had to be more, hadn't they? "I..., you're not having sex with me because Sirius isn't interested?"

Her mouth gapes open. "What? No." The disgust returns to her features. "I mean, I love your brother, he's one of my best friends, but he is the sluttiest man on Earth. I'd only have to ask him, and he'd be dropping his pants in a second."

Unsure eyes look at her.

"Reggie," She says softly, her hands cupping his cheeks. "I like you, not just the sex, not just the kisses. You. I like you." His eyes shine with tears as he looks at her, looking for a hint of a lie.

"I just came inside a peach." Is all he can muster out after a moment of silence. Her laughter erupts in his ears.

"Yeah, you did." She finally says in between giggles. "It was sexy." More laughter leaves her, and he smiles, unable to stop himself from how happy she sounds.

"It was?"

"Yeah," She finally breathes. "It made you taste sweet." Her fingers dance on his thigh, making their way up his stomach. She caresses where the juices from the peach fell, where she had been kissing him moments ago.

"Oh..."

"Oh indeed." She looks at him with a rueful smile. "I didn't mean to make you cry."

"I know." His hand grabs her, stopping her caresses, and he brings it to his mouth, placing a kiss on her palm.

"You know, normally, when someone confesses their feeling for you is polite to let them know if you feel the same way or not." She says, her voice tentative.

His eyes widen, and he looks up at her, her hand still over his lips. "I like you, yes, of course, I do." His rushed words make her smile. "I'm sorry, I'm not good at feelings."

Her other hand reaches his cheek. "It's okay. We'll learn; together. I just need you to talk to me, please." His hand cups the one on his cheek. "I knew something was weird this past week, but you didn't talk to me."

"I know. I'm sorry. I tend to get in my head and not talk with people when I think something is wrong."

"Just promise you'll talk to me next time, no matter what it is." Her sad eyes are all he needs to kiss her.

"I promise." He breathes once they break apart. His hands make their way from her cheeks to her waist. "I'm sorry." Is all he whispers while he lays her down, their lips locked.

"Reggie." She breaks the kiss as her head hits the mattress. "I'd love to, but I came up here to tell you dinner is ready, and you need to come down." His forehead touches hers.

"You were the one that started blowing me."

"Oops?" His stern eyes look into hers, making her giggle. "We can do whatever you want after dinner, I promise."

"You'll finish what you started?"

"Only if you do the peach thing again." He groans, his head going back and then falling on her shoulder.

"You're never going to let me forget that, are you?"

"Nope." She over-exaggerates the pop sound and softly pushes him off her. "Come on, put your shirt on. I don't want your parents sending anyone to check on us."

Reaching the bottom of the stairs and walking past the archway, they walk into the dining room, where everyone is waiting for them.

"Look who finally decided to join us." Leon's words are accentuated by his french accent.

"Sorry." Regulus quickly apologises, sitting down on one of the free chairs. He reaches for his glass of water as a house elve starts pilling food on his plate.

"Is everything okay?" Orion asks as he sips his wine.

"Yeah, you guys took so long to come downstairs." Sirius pipes up.

"All is peachy." Her cheery voice makes Regulus choke on his sip of water. Eyes look at him as he tries not to cough out a lung. "He fell asleep, took me a bit to get him up."

"Oh, you're still cranky when you wake up, Reg." Manon's teasing voice says.

"Yes, I guess." His cheeks are red as he prays nobody has realized the actual situation. Regulus' eyes have a glint in them, one that she recognises. She grins at him, fully knowing she's in for a lot tonight.

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unapologetic-and-aesthetic · 3 months

Text

A crule dream

Ace x gn!reader

Series: Telling them they are pretty

Description: You and Ace have been close friends, sharing companionship on the Moby-Dick for a long time now. As Ace seemingly finds himself in a dream of you, his bottled up feelings for you bubble to the surface, he has nothing to lose in a dream after all.

Header: by me ✨

Themes: Friends to Lovers, kinda; Idiots to Lovers, kinda; first Kiss; Angst with open ending; but its hinted at to be a happy ending; drunken kissing; mentions of alcohol and drunkenness; Ace is alive and well, what is this Marineford you are talking about.

Note: This has been sitting on my iPad since Febuary?! What is time even?! Its been a while since i posted a fanfiction of mine on the World Wide Webz, so i am a bit nervous about this. Also my first time writing gn!reader, so i‘m still getting used to it. This was supposed to be a little drabble but it kinda went of the rails :‘), this poor sad-boy needs a hug so badly.

It will be the first entry in a series about telling One Piece characters they are pretty. I am no native englisch speaker so please be kind in the comments. I appreciate every bit of feedback from you! Enjoy! ✨

And thank you to @fanaticsnail for being an inspiration to me for the past month or so, you are amazing!

The atmosphere on the Moby-Dick almost felt like a dream, it was all so effortlessly light-hearted today. The soft pinks and blues of the sunset faded perfectly into the dark night sky on the horizon, already dotted with softly shining stars.

You sat in the crow's nest together with Ace and enjoyed some quietness away from the lively party that was unfolding on deck down below. The crow's nest has always been your spot together.

Ace had one too many already, he read about Luffy in the newspaper today. It got him sentimental again, you knew it all too well. His laughter was always a little too loud after that. You wouldn‘t press him to talk about it, instead trying to comfort him with your company. You two were friends, close friends, you had each other's backs in any situation, even tho he was your commander. He never let you think for a moment this hierarchy was standing between you two. He valued your input and asked for your opinion on things frequently.

You and Ace stared off at the horizon in comfortable silence, sitting shoulder to shoulder, knee to knee, leaning against the mast. He could feel his thoughts drifting away, eyes wandering from star to star, the laughter of the crew down below fading into the background. There was only your warmth beside him now.

„Hey Ace, you are pretty! But you know that, right?!“, that snapped him out of his trance. He slowly turned his head towards you as you grinned up to him cheekily.

„Like how?“ his face turned into a confident grin as well. He was sure you were just joking around. The next thing you‘d say would be something along the lines of „pretty dumb“ or „in pretty deep shit“, and you both would laugh.

But instead of quipping a joke, you were quiet for a moment, studying his face intently. Why were your eyes suddenly so serious? He blinked, feeling your eyes on himself so intently made him a little nervous all of a sudden.

„Well… I like your freckles and your sharp nose… I think that's pretty.“ you said, taking a sip from your bottle. „Oh, and your hair!“ you reached up to touch the tip of a black hairstrand, that was closest to you. A small giggle escaped your lips at his dumbfounded expression.

He was quiet for a moment, his dark eyes looking into yours, seemingly searching for something. This must be one of his dreams, he must have dosed off again.

Sometimes when that happened, his dreams would be so realistic and sometimes so cruel. Like this one. He would dream of Sabo, Luffy and himself reunited and having a drink together, or seeing Yamato again or… well… for you to finally reciprocate his feelings. When he would wake up, he would remember most of it, which left him with a somber feeling for a few hours or even days.

Despite his tender feelings for you, he would never make a move, his position as devision-commander made it difficult, not to mention your close friendship. You were too important for him to ruin it all just like that.

This must be a dream then. Everything felt so light and soft right now.. and you would never say these things to him in reality. Pinpointing his insecurities as something you felt were beautiful? That would be too good to be true. He didn't deserve this to happen to him, he thought at that moment. He studied your face, taking in all the little details he had put to memory so many times before. The soft light of the sunset making your features soft, almost dream-like.

It was a dream, he was sure of it! So why not indulge?! Nothing had consequences right now, it was a dream after all. And he felt so lonely lately, the longing he felt for you has been eating him up inside.

You blinked at him, your face slowly becoming warmer with any moment he stared so intensely at you. You opened your mouth to say something, but he beat you to it.

„I see…“ his low voice was merely a whisper as he leaned in and gently took your face into his hands. His heart skipped a beat at your surprised expression. And was that a blush around your nose? So cute, he thought. The rough skin of his thumb caressed softly over your cheeks.

Your name fell from his lips, quietly, longingly, as if he could scare you away if it was any louder. He leaned in further, his nose brushing against yours.

„I want to kiss you for so long now…“ he all but whispered before pressing his lips to yours. It was a bit rough, but he wanted to pour every ounce of longing into this kiss he had harboured for the past year. Ace wanted to relieve his lonely heart of some pain. You froze up for a second, taken aback by the sudden feeling of his lips against yours, but you quickly found yourself enjoying it.

Your hands wandered behind his neck, as he moved his soft lips against yours. He wanted to know how you taste like and what beautiful noises could fall from your lips. You where gently holding him close, searching for something to hold onto while he pressed you closer to his chest and deepend the kiss.

A sigh fell between the two of you as he coxed your head to the side gently. You completely gave in to his kiss as his tonge brushed yours, letting him dominate your mouth. A million butterflies erupted in his stomach, a tingle went up his spine as you two moved in sync. He softly explored your mouth with his tounghe, brushing with yours in the procces as you did the same, which made him gasp into your mouth.

Yes, he thought, this feels right, kissing you felt so natural to him. Your body fit so well in his strong arms. He gently bit your lower lip as he slowly left your lips, both of you gasping for air, still close to one another.

His heart was banging against his ribcage, an intense blush spread across his face. Oh, he never wanted to let you go. His thumb gently brushed over your lower lip, red and swollen from the kiss you‘ve shared. You where at a loss for words, looking up to him throuhg your eyelashes bashfuly.

„Gods, I want to do this with you all the time, not only in my dreams.“ his gaze held an intense longing as he watched the soft light dance around your features “You are so beautiful right now…“ he whispered to you. „No. You are beautiful all the time,“ he corrected himself.

You gasped at his words. Shocked by his sudden outburst of passion and by yourself, indulging in a drunken kiss with your best friend. The kiss has left you lightheaded and it took you a moment to gather your thoughts to respond. He looked so dreamy right now, and so happy, you haven‘t seen him like that in a while. It made your heart soar.

„Ace, what…?“ you wanted answers, what dream was he talking about. Where was this coming from? But you were incapable of forming a straight sentence right now.

Suddenly, his eyes fell shut and his head lulled forward onto your shoulder, still holding you in his arms. „Ace?!“ you looked down to him, his head almosed nuzzled into the crook of your neck peacefully.

That bumbass dared to fall asleep right now?! After what just happened?!

Your head became clearer as you lingered in this position with him. As you began to think, your chest tightened, what was that all about?! And for how long would he sleep now? From experience you knew, that was unpredictable.

But you have an important mission tomorrow morning! You couldn't wait until he woke up and talk this out with him right now. It was already very late for you and you didn‘t wanna mess up tomorrow.

And would talking even be feasable? He might not even remember any of this. Maybe you could go back to your friendship as it was before then!

Thought after thought crashed down on you. And the worst one was: Would he regret kissing you, his close friend, if he remembered? Now…that would break your heart.

The waves didn‘t stop crashing, taking you with them into a spiral. What would your Crewmembers think?! What would Marco think!? Or your captain if he ever found out?!

Your breath got quicker and the fuzzy feeling in your chest quickly made way for a tight knot, making it more difficult to breathe.

„I am so sorry Ace“ you whispered to him as you gently leaned his sleeping body against the mast. The waves of emotions took you with them, you had no chance. The coil in your chest was unbearable now, you felt like crying. After one last tearful look at his peaceful sleeping face, you stood up and ran to your quarters, hoping no one saw you leaving the crows nest.

As the questions and thoughts flooded in, you barely took in your surroundings. The mission was so unimportant to you right now. Absentmindedly, you trotted after your team members, just going through the motions. It was a simple scouting mission anyway.

You tried to stop the thoughts and the guilt that where flooding you, but it was no use. Your head wandered to Ace and the kiss time and time again. You could still feel his lips on yours, his soft voice saying these sweet things to you and is warm embrace holding you so gently. What would happen now after this? You clutched your cest to stop your heart from beating so fast, squeezing your eyes shut for a moment.

"Hey, did you hear!? Ace made out with a crewmember yesterday!“ your head snapped up at your teammembers comment. How did they know already?!

Another one laughed “There is always a rumour about him and some crewmember making out at a party. You shouldn't believe everything you hear!“ the elder one gave the newbie a pat on the back.

This fired up the storm of anxiety inside you. So it was just a little makeout for him then!? No… you knew it was more. It meant more to you, at least. And you wanted to believe it was more for him as well. You knew about his little flings here and there.

What if he was just in the mood, and you where the next available option? You frowned at that nasty thought about you friend. Ace was better then his. But what would the crew think about you when they figured it out? What would they think about Ace?!

- Ace had slept until midday, waking up in the crow‘s nest, still in the position you left him in the previous night. He felt disoriented and had a terrible headache from the booze he had the evening before.

And something else felt wrong, it felt like he had had a dream inside a dream, that had never happened before. Ace scratched his head, tilting it to the side wondering. One of the dreams was about Luffy and a giant snake. They fought it together and then ate it. The other one was about you… and you two had kissed. That one he liked the most out of the two.

He sat up and stretched his arms and upper back, looking around for you in the process. But you weren't there with him in the crow‘s nest, unlike in his dream. As he looked around taking in his surroundings, and it slowly dawned on him. The exact place he was in right now seemed so familliar.

Oh no.

He jumped up with a scream of horror. That with you was no dream at all! He kissed you and said all these things for real. And he didn't even ask for your consent before kissing you! His breath got quicker as he tried to remember what exactly had happened yesterday.

Ace really kissed you… he grabbed you by the face even to hold you in place. And you looked surprised at that. Or was it shock on your face?!

He grunted, a feeling of dread creeping into his stomach. His memory was failing him, everything was so blurry.

Did you kiss him back? Or did you say anything at all? That's where it was all blurry for him. He remembered how good it felt to him. But what did you say to him? What did you do? He also remembered you tensed up when he smashed his lips to yours. That wasn‘t a good sign. The dread crawled up his spine lowly.

„Fuck… no,“ he took his hat that was laying on the ground where he slept and raged a hand through his hair before putting it on, just to shove it deep into his eyes.

“No, no, no!“ he wispered to himself under is breath, frozen for a moment and unsure what to do now. Go look for you and talk to you? And then what!? Admit his feelings and possibly destroy your friendship?!

He didn't deserve someone like you at all. You were way too good for him. So brave, and kind. You gave out your love so freely, without fear. Unlike him. You would never accept the feelings of a downer such as him.

Maybe he could backpaddle and say he was just very drunk? That might save your friendship. But he still kinda forced himself onto you. So the friendship was likely unrepairable already.

And it was all his fault. If someone would have rammed a knive into his chest right now, it would likely have hurt less.

Ace felt sick to his stomach, horrifyed as he imagined how you might be feeling right now. His mind filled in all the gaps his memory left open with crule things. Pictures of you trying to push against his chest to get him away from you, but he was too strong and helt you in his firm grasp. Tears in your eyes as he paused his advances on you for a moment. You running to the sleepingquarters, scared and probably disappointed in him, crying.

And you might not tell anyone about it. Ace was your superior and a well-respected member of the crew. He knew you didn't want to destroy his reputation, you would honour your friendship even after this. So you would stay silent with no one to turn to. And then you would leave the Moby-Dick!

Ace grabbed the mast with one hand, knuckles white, his body shaking. He wanted to throw up, wanted someone to punch him in the face. That was what he deserved.

„Oi! I‘ve been looking for you everywhere,“ it was Marco, coming in to the crow‘s nest behind him. Ace was just standing there, unable to move.

„Are y-,“ Marco stopped talking as he saw Aces trembling back. „Oi, what's wrong!?“ he asked, bridging the gap between them with two long steps. When his comrade didn't respond, Marco grabbed him gently by the shoulder to make Ace face him. His brows furrowed at the horrified expression on the other man's face.

„Ace?! What happened?“ Marco shook his shoulders in an attempt to bring him back to reality. This can‘t be good. „What happened last night!?“

At the question, the black-haired man snapped out of it. Did Marco know something about the incident? Did it already make its rounds? No, that couldn't be! He felt like someone was choking him.

He wispered your name „I kissed them….Marco," Ace confessed "I don't remember everything,“ his voice was shaking. Saying it out loud made the stone in his stomach heavier. „I am a superior….and I forced them to kiss me“ he looked to the ground with empty eyes, flinching as he saw Marcos's face scrunch up out of the corners of his eyes.

Marco was at a loss for words. He was rooting for you two to finally stop being dense and confess your obvious feelings to each other. But this was not what he had in mind. He saw you ran to the bunck with a sorrowful expression last night. With that last puzzle piece, it all made sense to him.

The older man gently pressed his fingertips into Ace's shoulders, trying to ground him. That poor boy was still trembling. He tried to find the words to break the news to him, but Ace was quicker with his question as his head snapped up „Where are they? Did you see them today already?“ he asked with a sense of urgency. „I- I need to apologize!“

„Well… you have some more time to think about what you want to say“ It hurt Marco to see Ace like this, and what he was about to say would hurt him even more. „They have been injured on the mission today and collapsed when they came back – from exaustion and bloodloss."

"What?", the other man's voice sounded dead. This can't be happening. Ace felt like his body was floating.

"It will be okay! It wasn‘t fatal, Ace. I already took care of it all" Marco added quickly, shaking him again as he noticed Ace empty gaze drift off. "Stay with me! I'm here with you. You're not alone." Ace, staring into space while Marco talked to him, bareley registering what he said "Talk to them when they wake up, i‘m sure its going to be fine." Marcos voice sounded far away.

Nothing is going to be okay. Ace had just lost a very important person to him, due to being a drunken mess. He must try everything to do damage controll as soon as he came down from the crows nest.

#one piece #one piece fic #x reader #op ace #portgas d ace #portgas ace x reader #ace x reader #op ace x reader #one piece x reader #gn reader #portgas ace x y/n

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lovelywetdreamer · 8 months

Text

Prompt 3: Dick teaching you to suck dick

"Can you pretty please teach me how to suck dick, Dicky?"

"Say what again?"

"You teach me your beautiful girlfriend to suck your dick. Please bae?"

In the first place in his life, Dick is out of words. His brain must be having a kick at his expense. That have to be it. You are like the most innocent person he knows. You never curse. For example, you called him a Moby Dick when he is acting like a dick sometime.

Now that he thinks about it, you stuttered everytime you try to make a dirty joke. With all the information he had collected about you, you can't blame your boyfriend for being shock from your lewd request. Dick's rub your soft, squishy cheek before pinching it. "Are you really my Y/N?"

"Don't be silly, of course it's me.", you put your hand on his chest and made him sit in a chair, "I just want to be a good girl that please her man." Your soul left your body. You can't believe you said that with a straight face; you couldn't say that to youself in the mirror without blushing.

"So are you going to teach me or not?", as you say while your knees are hitting the floor, your brown eyes are looking up into his piercing blue eyes. Now the second time in Dick's life, his mouth cannot search for words. His pant was becoming tight of the sight of his beautiful girlfriend on her knees for him. Dick's dick twitching and begging to be touch.

"Shit baby! You're going to melt my brain you that dontcha? Of course, I'll teach you babygirl, but I need to make sure you are okay with this. Do this for yourself not for me, okay?"

"I want to do this."

"I'm all yours then princess.", he says with a smirk as he unzip his pant and rub his thumb along your soft juicy, plumpy lips. "Before we start tho, can you bring me the chocolate syrup from the fridge?"

"Okay, but why?"

"Don't question your teacher."

When you came back retrieving the chocolate syrup from the fridge, Dick was spread eagle in the chair. He is a robin but how he looking at you, you would had thought he was wolf starring at his prey. You were on your knees before your brain could processed the action. "Hand me the chocolate syrup."

The moment you hand him the chocolate syrup he poured some already on his leaking dick. "I know you hate sour and bitter thing in your mouth."

You have the most sweetest boyfriend in the world, literally. He rubs his hand through your braids, "Please goes at your own pace and don't tries to force the whole thing down your throat. I know how greedy you can get."

"I'm not that greedy now", you say with a toothy grin. You wouldn't scared as you were nervous. Dick is suprisely packing. You are wondering now how he could hide this meaty six inch monster in that tight leather costume. You place a kiss on his red swollen, leaking precum tip. Experimental licks up and down on his length. You read in a book to make sure get a man's dick wet before putting it in your mouth.

Withdrawaling your tongue from his dick, whimpers escape Dick's mouth. You open your mouth wide enough to slowly put his tip inside your warm wet mouth. You don't want your teeth to gaze him. Inch by inch enter your mouth at the best of your ability. Dick has to keep running his hand through his hair. That's the only thing keeping him under control from thrusting upward into your hot little mouth.

"Try to bob your head up and down like bobbing for apples."

His hand were now on the back your head as you bob up and down on his length. "You're such a good girl for me." News to you his praise making you form a wet spot in your panties. You tried to shove his member down your throat, to no one suprise your gag reflex turn against you. Dick quickly remove himself from your mouth. "Are you okay?!", Dick say as he is rubbing your back.

"I gotten too cocky. Sorry, I'm good. Please let me continue."

"Okay, but remember you are a beginner."

You guys continue where you left at. Dick's moans and groans fill the room when you moved a little faster around him. You even moan around his member; Dick accidentally pulls your hair and say," You're gonna be a good whore for me right?

Sadly within ten minutes, Dick was tapping on your shoulder, "I'm gonna cum babygirl. You should probably get off my junk right now baby." He wanted to last longer for you. Little dick follow his own rules not big Dick's rule. You kept going on his dick waiting hungrily for his cum. Your mouth was full of his chocolate flavor cum. The chocolate syrup couldn't hide the true bitter flavor of his cum. At least he tried to hide the flavor for you.

He gave the biggest and wettest kiss on your lip.

#DC #dick grayson #batman #robin #dick grayson x female reader #nightwing #night wing x female reader #dick grayson x black reader #night wing black female reader #dick grayson smut #DC smut #night wing smut #dick grayson x inexperience reader

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cozage · 1 year

Note

OMG HIII I LOVE YOUR WRITINGGG this is gonna be my first request ever (literally having a nervous breakdown) but I wanted to request a fem reader who is the bio daughter of whitebeard and comes back after 2 years of shinobi training to meet the new crew member Fire fist ace! and can you pls make it a short fic (I cannot fathom the words of how obsessed I am with this man IFDFJDKDGJK) (also can she have a DF that's associated with lava? pls and thank you *literally bowing*)

A/N: God this was so adorable to write. I'm so obsessed with this fun little story. Literally once I started writing I couldn't stop. thank u

Characters: female reader, Ace, Marco, Whitebeard & Crew

Cw: alcohol, drunk reader

Total word count: 2.3k

Part 2 | Table of Contents | Read on A03

The Daughter’s Return Chapter 1: The Promised Position

The vivre card in your hand continued to move forward, but you could see the familiar outline of the Moby Dick ahead of you, and you grinned at the sight of being so close to your family again. You had been training for two years, and you couldn’t wait to catch up with your friends and your father after being apart for so long.

Your small boat looked even tinier as the giant ship loomed closer to you, but you weren’t concerned. Blue flames shot into the sky from the blue ship, and you sent out a stream of lava into the air in return. It was your code to the first division commander and friend, proof that you were who they were expecting.

You saw a creature with blue flamed wings shoot into the sky, and you gathered up your things. You only had a small backpack and a few bags of food, so there wasn’t much to pack up. You said goodbye to your small raft, thanking it for its usefulness during your journey.

Marco landed on your boat, and you squealed in delight seeing your brother again. He wrapped you up in a hug and spun you around, laughing gleefully at your return.

“Pops is going to be thrilled to see you,” he said, sitting you down. He ruffled your hair affectionately, smiling at you. “Missed you, kid.”

“Missed you too, Marco,” you said, grinning at him. You picked up a bag, handing it off to him to carry back to the ship.

“You’ve grown!” he commented. “I can’t look down at you anymore.”

You gave him a cheeky grin. “I’m stronger too.”

“You better be!” He laughed. “Pops didn’t smuggle you into Wano for you to come back the same!”

“Maybe he’ll finally make me commander now.” You stared up at the ship, thinking of the goal you’d been working towards since the beginning of your training.

“About that…” Marco trailed off, and you shot him a suspicious look.

“What?”

He sighed, deciding to prepare you. “Pop’s filled the second division commander seat, actually.”

“What?” you hissed. “You’re joking.”

“I’m not.”

“With who?” you demanded. You refused to believe him. “I thought nobody wanted it.”

“It’s a new guy.”

“A new guy?” you scoffed. “You’re pulling my leg, Marco. It’s not funny.”

Marco looked nervous talking about it. “Let’s go see Pops, alright? He’ll explain.”

You scowled, and your stomach clenched in anticipation. “Yeah, let’s go. I have some words to say to him.”

Marco wrapped his arms around your torso and extended his phoenix wings. “I’m glad to see you’re still a hothead.” You could hear the teasing in your voice, but you weren’t in the mood for jokes anymore.

“Shinobi training can’t fix everything,” you grumbled. You could feel your skin getting warm, a sign you were letting your emotions get to you.

You heard a lot of low whispers and mumbling, but you paid the new recruits no mind as you stormed across Moby Dick. Your father wasn’t on the deck, so you continued on to the command room.

“DAD!” you screamed, and you could see some of the newer members slink away from you in fear. A part of you felt some pride to have such an impact, but you were too pissed to revel in it.

You slammed the command room door open to find your father speaking with another man you didn’t recognize, but you paid the guest no mind. You were too focused on settling the score of the second division commander seat.

Whitebeard smiled at you. “Y/N! You’re-”

“You bastard!” you shrieked. You pulled out a kunai, pointing it at your old man. “You promised!”

The unknown man threw a knife and knocked the kunai out of your hand, and you turned to glare at him. He was shirtless and was wearing an obnoxious orange hat, and he was returning your gaze with a look of equal irritation.

“Stay out of this, newbie,” you hissed at the man.

You reached into your pouch to grab another kunai, but he lunged at you, grabbing your wrist to stop you.

“I don’t know who you are,” the man said in a low, dangerous voice. “But you have no right attacking Pops the moment you get on our ship.”

“Stay out of my affairs,” you snarled.

You turned your wrist to lava rocks to burn his hand, but at first the man didn’t react. You frowned, turning up the heat to liquidize your arm into magma, and finally the man pulled away in pain. He looked down at his hand in shock, as if he wasn’t expecting to be burned. You couldn’t blame him. It’s not everyday someone’s skin turns into boiling liquid.

Whitebeard laughed loud and hearty, breaking the tension between you and the man, and you refocused your anger back to your father.

“Never a dull moment with you around, kid! It’s great to have you back,” he laughed, and your face flushed with anger.

“You promised me a commander position when I got back,” you yelled at him. “Who the hell did you give it to instead?”

Whitebeard laughed even harder. “That would be Ace.”

“Who the hell is Ace?” you hissed.

The shirtless man raised his hand. “Uh-”

“I said stay out of my affairs!” You could feel steam coming off your head. Sometimes that happened when you got too angry.

The man pointed at himself. “Me. I’m Ace.”

You could feel your insides turning hot, lava coursing through your veins.

“You’re joking,” you said. You glanced at your father, who was still smirking at the two of you. “He’s joking, right?”

You father raised his eyebrows, his gaze darting between the two of you, but he said nothing.

“Portgas D. Ace,” the man said, holding out a hand to you. You rolled your eyes and turned away from him, facing your father.

“This guy?'' Your voice was full of skepticism.

“Hey!” Ace yelled from behind you. “Don’t underestimate me!”

“I could squash you like a bug,” you shot back, still refusing to look at him. “Dad-”

“The decision was made with good reason, my girl,” Whitebeard said. “You’ll be working alongside him closely in the second division.”

“No, I won’t,” you laughed, rolling your eyes at his suggestion.

“Yes, you will.” You could hear the seriousness in your father’s voice, the warning of consequences thick in his tone.

You decided it was best to not outright defy him, and you switched your tactic from stubborness to logic.

“I’ve always been under Marco,” you reasoned.

“You’ll be better suited in the second division now.” You could feel Ace smirking behind you, and you resisted the urge to turn around and punch his teeth out.

“Let me get this straight,” you said, trying to keep a level voice. “You give my commander position away and then tell me I have to work under the guy who took it from me?”

Ace laughed. “The second division position has been open for-”

You flicked a volcanic rock back at him, and he yelped in pain.

“Marco is a fire user like me,” you worked to plead your case further. “And I know him. I would work better under him.”

“The first division is a medical division now,” your father explained. You could see you were testing his patience, but you didn’t care. “Your talents are better served on the offensive front, which Ace leads.”

“But-”

“Plus,” your father added, cutting you off. “Ace is a fire user as well.”

You felt warmth spring up behind you, but you refused to give Ace the satisfaction of being acknowledged.

“Dad-”

“I’m not wavering on this decision,” he said with finality.

You felt your father’s conqueror’s haki spread out over the ship, and you knew that you had lost the argument. You could hear Ace stumble slightly behind you, and you resisted the urge to argue even further over the man’s weakness. At this point it would only make your father angry, even if you were right.

“Fine, fine,” you sighed, giving up. There’d be plenty of time to talk with him about the position and prove your worth. “Can we at least have a party?”

Whitebeard’s overwhelming presence disappeared and his jolly laugh returned in an instant, already forgetting your alls squabble. He stood up, wrapping you in a comforting embrace, leading you past Ace and out onto the deck.

“My daughter has returned home!” he shouted, and the crew cheered. “Prepare a feast!”

At least the party life on the Moby Dick hadn’t changed at all. You could still beat just about anyone in a drinking contest, and by halfway through the night, your mind was cloudy from the alcohol.

You took a step away from the party and the fun to get a moment alone with the stars. You took a drink of the ale in your tankard, staring up at the million lights in the sky and thinking about how different the constellations looked during your time in Wano. You were so close to that country and those people, yet so far.

“I think we got off on the wrong foot,” a male voice said behind you, startling you from your thoughts.

You glanced back to find Portgas D. Ace walking towards you, looking up at the night sky. He was attempting to be casual about the whole thing, as if he had randomly found you here, but you could tell that he had most likely searched you out on purpose.

You rolled your eyes and turned away from him. He wasn’t even worth giving the time of day. He hadn’t done anything to prove he was anything special yet.

But Ace obviously wasn’t willing to give up that easily, because he came and stood directly next to you. His eyes were still on the sky, just like yours were.

“I just feel like since we’re going to be working together, we should probably get to know each other a little better,” he said.

You thought of plenty of snarky responses, but said none of them. You knew the silent treatment would be the best way to shut him down. Portgas D. Ace was not your friend. You wanted nothing to do with him.

“Are you happy to be back on the ship?”

Still nothing came out of your mouth. You didn’t even look his way, you simply took another long drink. But you could see him starting to pout. It was only a matter of time before he gave up and returned to the party. You just had to keep your mouth shut.

“All the guys said you had a pretty smoking ability. But I dunno, I think my fire ability is pretty hot.”

You scoff at that. “I’m hotter,” you shot back.

Damn him. He could rile you up, and he knew exactly how to. You could see him smirk in the corner of your eye, and you cursed yourself for being so easy to manipulate.

“That’s what they all said too,” he said quietly, a smile still lingering on his face.

You turned to look at him, your face full of frustration. “What do you want?”

He seemed surprised by your question. “What do you mean?”

“Why are you speaking to me?” you demanded. “What do you want?”

“Wh-No-I just-” Ace stammered, trying to find his words.

You stared at him, your scowl deepening every time he started his sentence over.

“You’re Whitebeard’s daughter, aren’t you?” he finally asked.

“Yeah. And?”

“I’ve just heard a lot about you,” he said.

“And?”

“I dunno,” he said. “You intrigued me.”

You scowled at him. “What the hell does that mean?”

“I dunno!” He let out an exasperated sigh, turning his gaze to the stars. “You were just this larger than life story people always told since I got on this ship. Everyone always had something to say about you. I guess I just wanted to know how much of it was true.”

“All of it is true,” you said.

Ace let out a laugh, and then clamped his hand over his mouth to stop himself. “I really hope not.”

Your eye twitched, and you could feel your skin starting to tingle. “If people are lying about me, they’ll pay for it.”

“Marco talked about you like you were this sweet little kid.”

“Marco’s delusional.”

Ace laughed again, and this time he didn’t stop himself. You found yourself smiling along with him.

“He definitely sees the best in people,” Ace said.

You shot him a look. “What’s that supposed to mean?”

You could see Ace tense. “Oh, nothing! I-”

You let out joyous rings of laughter now, and you see Ace give a strained smile, mostly unsure of how to react to your sudden friendliness.

“You’re funny, Portgas D. Ace.” You go to take another sip of alcohol, just to find your cup empty. You frowned at it, and turned to go find more booze.

“I’ll get it,” Ace offered, holding out his hand to take your cup. “I’m empty too.”

You nod, handing it off to him. The party was so loud anyway. You preferred the quiet atmosphere this late in the night. He strode away, and you watched him go, your father’s emblem displayed proudly on his back. He still wasn’t anything special, but at least he wasn’t scared of you like half of the crew.

You hadn’t realized how much alcohol you had drank throughout the night until you were alone, and suddenly the world was spinning. You laid down on the deck to get your bearings, and then found yourself stuck there.

When Ace came back, he found you sprawled out, staring upwards.

“You okay?” he asked. He bent down to look at you, his face obscuring part of the sky.

You giggled. “Your freckles look like stars.”

“You’re drunk.”

“No you’re drunk.”

He chuckled. “Your insults get worse as the night goes on.”

You stuck your tongue out at him, and then patted the deck next to you. “Come lay down.”

He obliged, his head resting next to yours. “What are we looking for?” he questioned.

“Shhhh!” you hissed, pressing a finger to his mouth. “You’ll scare them away.”

You felt his lips turn upward against your finger, but he was quieter when he spoke.

“What are we looking for?” he whispered.

“Shooting stars!” you whispered back.

“Oh,” Ace whispered. “Of course.”

“Tell me when you find one,” you said quietly. “I’m going to rest my eyes for a minute.”

You’re not sure if he ever found one. You were asleep before he responded.

#im a sucker for stargazing SUE. ME!!!!#one piece #one piece imagine #one piece scenario #one piece x reader #one piece x you #portgas d ace #portgas ace x reader #portgas d ace x reader #portgas d ace x y/n #portgas d ace x you #ace x reader #ace x y/n #cozage #the daughters return #✧˚ace✧˚

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burningvelvet · 4 months

Text

I finished Moby Dick. So, to continue my former post(s) documenting my thoughts, here we are (spoilers ahead):

captain ahab: i am once again asking hast thou seen the white whale

Narrator, for the 5 millionth time describing captain ahab: "MONOMANIACAL. MONOMANIAC. MONOMANIA."

I was thinking "the homosexual themes everyone talks about are really exaggerated apparently…" and then I got to the chapter about sperm squeezing

Stubb meeting with the French in chap 91 had the exact vibe of a filler episode on a comedy sitcom

there are a lot of moments that reminded me of The Office ngl like i could just imagine stubb in the little interview chair just talking. so much meme material. he's seriously just doing his own thing. the little random characters like the blacksmith and carpenter just talking shit and side-eyeing ahab in the background lmaoooo

Saint George didn't kill a dragon, it was a whale #THETRUTHREVEALED #WHALETRUTHERS

It would have been hilarious if the British people told Ahab that they already killed Moby Dick already before he could get to it. I was so hoping that would happen. Bonus points if it was the Rachel after he'd turned them away.

Ahab discusses the topic of madness a lot. It's almost like he's… mad...

I vote Ahab for the most Byronic hero to ever Byronic… Heathcliff and Rochester have nothing on him… The origin of the Byronic hero, Byron's titular character from the narrative poem Childe Harold, is literally mentioned by name in the novel and had to be a blatant inspiration - it could not be more obvious! (I have yet to encounter the famed Byronic heroes of Russian literature, most notably Eugene Onegin, a work where Byron is also blatantly name-dropped).

Everyone thinking Queequeg was dying and having a coffin made to his measurements and filled with grave goods at his direction and then him literally climbing into the coffin to test it out and then waiting silently to die…. then all of a sudden getting better and saying he chose to recover bc he remembered he had something on his to-do list….. iconic

Ishmael referring to Queequeg as "my Queequeg…" omg. Queerqueg

Queequeg drawing figures like the ones on his tattoos omg… au story where Queequeg is an artist/tattoo artist when???

I was literally saying "AWWWWW" out loud when Ahab and Pip were having their little moments

The irony of Ahab abandoning the Rachel then it coming back for Ishmael… the coffin lifeboat… etc… good stuff…

okay ahab is my man but yeah he was an asshole to the captain of rachel.

also feel bad for tashtego. he wanted that gold doubloon so bad and ahab was like SIKE, MOTHERFUCKER! umm tashtego did not get cut out of a whale by queequeg to deal with ur shit ahab!

Once again wanting a Black Sails/Moby Dick AU… I found this essay about the similarities between Flint/Ahab https://ijms.nmdl.org/article/view/22389/14361

They only have like 2-3 little moments together but like… Starbuck/Ahab kind of outdoing Ishmael/Queequeg there for a moment… chaps 132/134… oh my godddddddddddddd whyyyyyyy

Captain Ahab's moments in chapters 36/37 AAAAAHHHHH you will see me being normal about this

I noted some of my favorite Ahab moments/chapters and they are 36/37/41/70/99/108/109/113/115/116/119/125/129/132/134/135. Like I may seriously just re-read those chapters (no offense to Melville's whale facts, Stubb's jokes, & Pip's insanity)

the end is kind of similar to the great gatsby in the sense that you finally realize the entire novel was actually written for him to cope with his grief-related trauma & then suddenly it all makes sense. the lingering, the sentimentality regarding seemingly insignificant details or people, the meandering/digressing/procrastinating getting to the end, etc.

there are actually several moments -- i don't know if he actually referred to ahab or the others in past-tense specifically, but there were several moments where i felt like i kind of thought he was giving away the end before he did (it wasn't a shock to me bc i read about the end prior, but still)

#moby dick #herman melville #my reviews #reading opinions #book thoughts #book opinions #american literature #english literature #literature #lit #classic literature #captain ahab #melville #books #reviews #bookblr #spoilers #moby dick spoilers

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markantonys · 11 months

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My Mom Reacts To: wheel of time season 2 episodes 5-8 (episodes 1-4) (season 1)

the episode 1-4 post did not contain book spoilers, but this one does, so beware!

first, some dinnertable questions that arose in the past few days:

mom: 3000 years ago, when the first dragon was around, was ishamael--wait. was ishamael the dragon? me: no mom: but he was around back then? me: yes, he was the first dragon's best friend, but then he betrayed him mom: just like how liandrin is betraying everyone

(also, she keeps trying to call him "ishmael" like the moby dick character)

mom: at the end of 14 books, does good triumph over evil? me: i'm not gonna tell you that mom: well this show won't go for 14 seasons, or if it does, i'll be in a dementia ward by then

mom: how long is someone the amyrlin? me: for life, unless they get removed mom: is it an elected position or would they have like a coup? me: [sweating] it's an elected position

she wanted to know where everything was, so i pulled out the handy randland map mug she gave me for christmas to show her! haha

she also asked if we see more of the other colors (ajahs) in the books, and i said if anything we see less because liandrin and alanna have much less screentime in the books, and she was very surprised to hear that

dad: [setting up a dad joke voice] what's it called when lan dies? me: what? dad: lan's end

(okay that might be an americans-only joke lmao there's a big clothing chain called lands' end, not sure how widespread it is. but it cracked ME up, at least!)

mom: does lan die?!?!?!? me: you read his wikipedia article like 2 months ago mom: well i don't remember any of it, that was a long time ago!

she also assumed that no one who is together now (lanaeve + randgwene) will end up together. i'd straight up told her a while ago that rand and egwene don't end up together but she wasn't totally sure of that now, so i think it's actually okay if i tell her spoilers because she'll forget them immediately djkfjgh

episode 5

"she should be glad to get those ridiculous nails cut"

she was horrified by the horse slaughter!

my dad laughed at the guy getting his head exploded, maybe it's not just rand maybe he just likes to see Anyone have a bad time

elyas: your friends from the two rivers aren't your pack mom: ohhhh 😔😠 elyas: neither was your wife mom: [GASP]

she loves hopper so much and i'm not ready for her to see ep8!!

brown sister trio introduced, we pause as i am tasked with writing down every ajah and what they do lmao

my mom repeatedly asked if suroth was a forsaken. probably because she has The Audacity to talk to an actual forsaken Like That!

not much reaction to aviendha at all this episode! i think my mom was a bit overwhelmed by all the new info being learned in this episode, so she was more concerned with trying to figure out who the aiel and the seanchan are than with paying attention to aviendha specifically (partially my fault bc i first explained the aiel as "those warrior people" and she thought i meant the seanchan lmao). she mourned that we hadn't started our character/terminology list on a bigger piece of paper!

i had to fight to keep it together rather than shout with joy during the gawyn namedrop djkjfgh

mom: did the red one free nynaeve so they could try to escape?? me: yes mom: she is just too complicated for me

in this same vein, my dad later referred to liandrin as a "double double agent"

moiraine: [big sigh] dad: she's always a drama queen

he's not wrong jkdjfg

ishy tenderly stroking rand's face also got no reaction, much to my surprise haha i meanwhile was silently losing it

when the seanchan were bringing out egwene and saying how powerful she is, my dad was like "but she's the wrong one, it's the other one who's powerful" oh my god let poor egwene LIVE djkfg even he is pulling a "did you hear that nynaeve is the most powerful channeler we've seen in 1000 years" on her!

my mom cracked up at moiraine saying "it's your choice rand, i mean it this time" and was like "yeah i was gonna say, is she ACTUALLY going to let him choose here?"

episode 6

my mom literally THE SECOND renna's bracelet linked with the a'dam: "so she can channel too? i thought these people punished everyone who can channel" not her INSTANTLY clocking The Sul'dam Secret when in-world it apparently took hundreds of years for anyone to notice hahaha this certainly lends weight to the "this information Is Known but routinely suppressed, as fascist governments are wont to do" interpretation over the "literally not a single person had any idea until the wondergirls" interpretation

lanfear: why do you think you can't trust me? mom: because you have a silly hat

911 lanfear's just been murdered. i guess some people (straight women) ARE immune to her dominatrix outfit djkfg

my mom also voiced her displeasure with rand's haircut again in this scene. my mom 🤝 me 🤝 mat

BOTH my parents thought lanfear's condition was going to be that rand had to kill moiraine himself! the second he opened his eyes they both said it! they're already thinking so dark!

on that note, i'd predicted my mom would be annoyed at moiraine for refusing barthanes's sandwiches, but that was not the case: instead, she and my dad both went "oh i bet the sandwiches are poisoned" they're so suspicious of everything now! and rightfully so

"i can hear you bickering from the fruit market" got a good laugh

my mom also gave a hearty, appreciative chuckle at mat shitting on rand's hair. he spoke for all of us!

mat: i'll meet you in an hour mom: they don't have watches, how will they know when it's been an hour?

mom when moiraine apologizes to barthanes: why is she being nice? me: because she feels bad mom, as if it never occurred to her moiraine might have a conscience: oh..............

mom when siuan arrives in cairhien: now someone can tell her about liandrin! me: but no one here knows that mom: UGH!!!

haha welcome to wheel of time! the necessary information is always stuck in the wrong plotlines and unable to be passed along to the relevant people!

elayne to nynaeve: if we help ryma, we can't help egwene mom: oh this poor woman, now she's faced with another hard choice just like in the arches! me: [sits there stunned because i never made that connection]

episode 7

my mom loved lan telling rand to tuck in his shirt, naturally

lan: heron dips over the wing [or whatever the name was] mom: what? me: it's a sword form, they all have weird names mom: oh, that would explain why it didn't make any sense

lan: your duty is to protect everyone in the world, not just the ones you love mom: that's a big responsibility :(

she laughed and said "she doesn't like not being the boss!" at nynaeve's face when elayne told her to do what she said

she is SO PRESSED about other characters needing to find out about liandrin. she was so excited when anvaere eavesdropped and then so mad when moiraine left before anvaere could tell her the news (but i reassured her by saying that moiraine is about to go to the same place as nynaeve & co who will be able to tell her)

moiraine: [is Mean to lan] mom: TUH! dad: he should just slay her

mom: so what does this tea do? me: allegedly it will show mat his past lives mom: but it might be a trick me: ishamael DOES call himself "father of lies"

my dad was like "that was cool!" after mat's bad trip, which is among his biggest reactions to anything, other than "[chuckles] that was a good one!" when egwene said "renna i will kill you"

ishy: i just want to close my eyes and never have to open them again mom: so kill yourself then 🙄

911 ishamael's also been found murdered. i think she could put the forsaken in line honestly, "you have a silly hat" "kill yourself" she's just not having any of their shit. i hate to compare her to cadsuane, but it's kinda giving cadsuane.

lanfear's dominatrix outfit did get more appreciation this time though when the silly hat was not present ("they had fun with her costumes")

rand: i need your help lanfear mom: ??????? doesn't he know she's evil???????

"she could at least say something nice to lan 🙄" when moiraine fails to say something nice to lan after getting unshielded thanks to him

lanfear: [broken amyrlin line] mom: is she broken??? me: i think she just meant metaphorically, not physically mom: oh. but their love is broken :(

episode 8

my dad actually put his laptop away to watch this episode with his full attention. this is high praise! he never does that!

mom: who's that? [dain] me: the whitecloak perrin spared when he escaped with aviendha mom: i don't remember that me: we watched that YESTERDAY mom: 🤷

she did remember after another moment though haha but that supports my impression that ep5 was A Bit Too Much New Info for her to take in all at once

lanfear: rand i'm the only one who truly cares about you mom: i don't think THAT'S true!

when perrin tells hopper to stay there: "he's just going to leave his dog out in the desert with no water???"

mom when lanfear calls ishy sweetheart and strokes his hair: wait was he the one she was in love with????? me: no it was rand's past life, that's why she's obsessed with rand mom: rand's past WIFE???? me: LIFE

babe wake up new polycule just dropped (lanfear/ishy/lews/ilyena)

she GASPED when renna cut off egwene's braid! as she should!

she said "too bad min isn't here" during the episode (she thought it would be helpful if min could tell mat what would happen if he were to touch the dagger; i was like "i think he knows it would be bad mom" lmao) and after the episode she anxiously asked if we would ever see min again, dammit mom don't you dare become a min stan on me jdkfgh (although, the fact that she thought we might not see her again indicates it's 0% on her radar that min might be anyone's love interest, which is interesting! a number of show-onlys were at least expecting her to be mat's i think)

nynaeve: i'll make you regret the first kiss your mother ever gave your father mom: [delighted] that's a creative one! dad: there are a lot of nasty women on this show and only one nasty man [ishy] me and mom: TUH!

although he is not wrong to say that s2 was the season of Female Villains and Women Being Mean (and i loved every moment of it!). don't you worry dad, rand's gonna be stepping up to fill the Nasty Man Quota soon enough. and i can't wait!

dad when rand is watching egwene from a distance: he's not doing a good job of hiding me: at least his cloak is the same color as the wall dad: well his dumb face isn't

why is he SUCH a hater when it comes to poor rand jkdjfg please, that's your future son-in-law!

they both were repeatedly pressed about everyone carrying the horn box (or rather "the briefcase" as my dad called it) out in the open

mom: they need to just put it in a sack! me: they don't have any sacks on hand! mom: there's plenty of sacks lying around!!!

she keeps thinking that rand got the heron-marked sword from his mom, and when she saw that turak had one she was like "but i thought those were the swords of the aiel?" and i cracked up imagining how offended aiel would be to hear her say that

she missed rand killing all the seanchan because she was too busy asking me the above question, but when she looked back at the screen she went 1) "oh, this is so gory" 2) "did RAND do all that????"

she was sad about ingtar, she was like "ohhhh, i liked him :(" imagine caring about ingtar, could not be me jdkfg

me: so lanfear is talking about the seals of the other forsaken, she wants this guy to throw them all in the ocean because she doesn't want them to be released mom: why doesn't she just do it herself? me: me: me: i don't know, actually..................

(maybe she just wanted them gone stat but didn't want to leave falme for even a moment while shit was going down with rand and ishy? or maybe she was like, I'm Too Hot And Iconic To Get My Hands Dirty Doing Things Myself)

mom as soon as renna's shown to be alive, after egwene's picked up the collar: she should go put the collar on her!

she been knew again!

mom at the mat-perrin reunion: put the spear down before you hug him, you'll stab someone by accident!!!!

she was glad to see egwene get her vengeance, but added "but now i bet she'll feel guilty for killing someone because she's a good person :("

ishy: [talking about what rand did in his past life] mom: rand doesn't even remember that! rand right on cue: i'm not lews therin!

i warned her "you might not want to look" just before hopper's death, but she did look, and she was very sad. as was i!

she thought that one of the heroes of the horn was stepin and i told her it wasn't (it was just some random guy with similar hair) but maybe i should've let her keep on believing it because it's a nice idea!

mom when the spear goes through ishy and hits rand: OH NO!!!! just like min said!!! me: [vibrating with glee over The Great Cauthor Stabbening]

when ishy said "i'm sorry old friend" to rand here my dad said "that sounds familiar" and i was like what's he talking about? but then realized that's what LTT said to ishy in the cold open!!! my heart!!! thank you dad for catching that parallel, i gotta go make a gifset now

"how is one guy holding off all these soldiers by himself?" mom i cannot believe you of all people would doubt lan!

she laughed at rand being like "[half-dead] who are you???" but made no comment on the subsequent romantic shot of elayne. however, after the episode she was like "'who are you?' rand said................is something going to happen with him and elayne??" and i was like 🤷😁😁😁😁 and then she said "but they both have red hair, are they from the same place?" and i told her that elayne is not aiel and not ALL redheads are aiel lmao and maybe i should've just said "you'll see" but. i don't think it's a spoiler to confirm that elayne is not aiel.

she does not believe that ishy is really dead, and she kept asking me if he was really dead and if he shows up again later in the books and i swear, the three oaths possessed me in that moment and made me incapable of saying "yes he's really dead, no we don't see him again in the books". so i just kept shrugging which probably made it obvious that indeed, this is not the last we see of him haha

mom when moiraine starts weaving fire in the direction of the tower: what's she doing?! everyone's up on that tower!!! me: she's not trying to BLOW UP RAND mom: oh

at some point during all the battles she was like "now what's lanfear up to during all this? 🤨" a good thought to have always!

at the end of the episode: "now we have to wait a whole year or two for the next season!!!!!" she's hooked!!

favorite character roundup: my mom said lan is #1 and egwene is #2, and she also loves loial, and she said that she didn't care for perrin last season but likes him a lot now. my dad said his favorites are "the tree guy" (loial) and "the new woman at the end who's more powerful than anyone we've seen so far" (moghedien! that one was a surprise to me. tumblr 🤝 my dad. i hope he'll enjoy The Season Of Moghedien next season! tho it could also be that he just said her because she was the last character we saw and he'd already forgotten all the other ones lmao)

#wot #wot on prime #the wheel of time #wot show spoilers #wot book spoilers

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one-idea · 3 months

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I have the headcanon that Ace loves the ocean and water and just all of that.

Saying this, I think it leads to some great fic ideas.

- Maybe there was a river in the forest that was free of dangerous animals and he went swimming in it. Maybe once Sabo came along the two of them would swim together, and when Luffy came along he would try his best to join in. Maybe once Sabo died the river fell to the same fate as the treehouse, a place too painful to return to.

- Ace is a devil fruit user, and obviously this means he cannot swim. I think that once this realization set in there would be a lot of panic since he just lost basically a big part of his life. I think this could lead to some really good angst and (forgive me if I’m wrong I have not read Ace’s novel) especially since he is alone with a stranger on some random island.

- I know it’s canon that he’s jumped into the water after Luffy, but I also think that with this headcanon he would do that unprompted. “Omg it’s hot out I’m gonna go swim” “ACE YOU CANT SWIM STOP” “oh no!”

- This bit is a little more self indulgent but I think it would have been really cool and impactful if Ace had a Viking funeral.

Anyways, sorry if there are any spelling mistakes or if I got too rambly :D

This bursts but is also so comical.

Ace probably did grow up loving to swim. Him and Sabo having a secret swimming hole is very cute.

(I’ve never been clear. Devil fruit users can’t swim in salt water or all water. Because I just watched Chopper swim around in a swimming pool no problem, so my assumption is that fresh water is alright but salt water will kill them)

With that understanding in mind if the swimming hole was fresh water Luffy could have joined them.

Sabo and Ace got used to having to pull Luffy out of the Sea or Estuaries (where salt and fresh water mix) they both became excellent swimmers. You have to be when you’re constantly doing water rescues for you little brother.

On Sixis Ace probably tried to swim his way out at least once and almost drowned for his efforts (this was before he ate the fruit)

Afterwards he did have to mourn not being able to swim. It was a big part of him. And now who’s going to save Luffy? (Yes his little brother is on a different island but it’s always been his and Sabo’s job, and when Sabo died it fell to him. Taking care of Luffy is so engrained that it’s one of his first concerns)

He likes Deuce but the raft makes him a little nervous because while his new powers are going to power it and get them off this island (theoretically) if the raft brakes he’s relying completely on Deuce to get them both to shore. That’s a lot of trust to put in someone you just meet. Especially for Ace. It’s a big moment in their relationship for him (Deuce does not know this) because if the raft breaks Deuce would struggle to get himself back to shore, let alone Ace (the currents are awful) but he’s promised to do it and Ace believes him.

Once they get off the island Deuce gets put in Ace duty. Ace has always been an amazing swimmer and he often forgets he can’t swim anymore.

It’s a running joke in the Spades that Deuce doesn’t wear a shirt because he has to jump after their captain so often.

Deuce originally got pretty upset with Ace “are you trying to die?” Like he can understand forgetting the first few times but come on! But slowly Ace opens up and tells him about his little brother and their childhood and how much Ace loved swimming. Suddenly Deuce doesn’t mind fetching his captain as much. And if he check each island they visit for a fresh water swimming hole that’s his business.

This continues on the Moby Dick. Ace will jump in after other Devil fruit user and get scolded “Ace you’ve had your fruit of over a year! How do you keep ‘forgetting?’”

Ace: “it’s a force of habit”

This is how people (Thatch, Marco, and the over commanders) find out about Luffy.

When Ace runs into Luffy in Alabasta it’s force of habit to jump in after his kid brother. The crew would be more exasperated if Luffy and Chopper didn’t jump after each other as well. Their devil fruit users often forget that the sea wants them dead.

The idea of a Viking funeral is sick. But I don’t think he’d get on just because it’s the Red Hair Pirates who bury them and they don’t know Ace that well. Deuce probably does a symbolic one when he visits the grave.

#one piece #portagas d. ace #masked deuce #acedeuce #whitebeard pirates #spade pirates #monkey d. luffy #asl brothers

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stillbornedprincess · 2 months

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the long awaited Moby dick book review observation for the modern young lady.

do not open if you do not want spoilers

now. The novel is a very dated one, but with all renowned dated novels it’s timeless with at least one theme to touch everyone. Personally I enjoyed reading the novel so much but why it is I found it so beautiful would be untranslatable. Not that I won’t try, and with the first part of the title of this post, “a review”, this will not be a review. Nor will it be a summary: so for accuracy “observation” was coined. A unique aspect of the book, which also makes it notorious, is that is serves more or less like a mirror. What you’ll find in your heart, you’ll find in the text. A journalist would prove it to you in a neater way, but bear with me. There were plenty chapters that twinkled in its secret tongue to me but I’ll highlight two or three. I will start with chapter 85: the fountain. This chapter is about the enigmatic spout of sperm whales. In the olden days, people could only guess how those bodies worked. And even still today, suppose, we still do guess, guessing this time maybe not just with fickle mind but with machines as well. A photograph is a sacred thing. Anyways, here’s a quote narrated by the narrator ‘Ishmael’

how nobly it raises our conceit of the mighty, misty monster, to behold him solemnly sailing through a calm tropical sea; his vast, mild head overhung by a canopy of vapor, engendered by his incommunicable contemplations, and that vapor—as you will sometimes see it—glorified by a rainbow, as if Heaven itself had put its seal upon his thoughts. For, d'ye see, rainbows do not visit the clear air; they only irradiate vapor. And so, through all the thick mists of the dim doubts in my mind, divine intuitions now and then shoot, enkindling my fog with a heavenly ray. And for this I thank God; for all have doubts; many deny; but doubts or denials, few along with them, have intuitions. Doubts of all things earthly, and intuitions of some things heavenly; this combination makes neither believer nor infidel, but makes a man who regards them both with equal eye.

now, whenever talk of rainbows come up in art or literature, it’s bound to stick out to me. with colours, they make up my stillbornland, and with colours, they make up awe-ful greys. my arguments for the colour grey would be just as jagged as ‘Ishmael’’s arguments for the colour white in the chapter 42. But matters like this are never rational seeing the nature of colours. Maybe God the Painter was a postmodernist. Of course this is a joke, please take it as the joke it is.

and on the topic of jokes, the humour of Moby dick is wry as dried whale foreskin. Worn to take on scalding topics, not so different from try-working workers would put it on to shield from soot and fire. The narrator, who I’m not too sure whether or not he would be the protagonist; funny guy. We the reader are taken by the shoulder like the wedding guest and from then on the leaves of the book fly by like the wedding banquet happening indoors as we watch into the eyes of our ancient marinier with a brisk opening note of “Call me Ishmael.” And an immediate “Some years ago—never mind how long precisely, having little or no money in my purse, and nothing particular to interest me on shore. . ..”

the character of Ishmael is simple: he tells us about the time as a young man he dreamt up sweet nothings. It also happens that he is very lonely. He’s alone in the first few chapters, and alone again in the epilogue. Ishmael isn’t alone for the whole novel though. His weary heart finds rest in the manly arms of pagan queeqeg which kept him warm at the spouter inn. this gooey part of Ishmael and his friend isn’t really acknowledged again. but what I said about the text being a mirror, many reviewers as seen on Goodreads and jstor, and slate magazine, found it a little erotic. Erotic if you wilt. But personally, I understand why one would interpret that, and I suppose this novel, the watercolour fresco it is, in its washing shades, a layer inbetween touches on that human weakness. And on human weakness, another wash it is, can be traced from the tube that is moody captain ahab. The shade of “mood” as I’ll call it, its body will be taken from ahab. think how paints are mixed together to be darker or bluer or redder, that’s what I’m getting at, as I said about journalists. Ahab: the blue. Pipin: the white (a blinding, humbling white) (ironic cause Pipin is very very black. You could say even, Pipin represents the swallowing mythology of race within the ancient western order, made self aware.) And why it is I chose Pipin to be the lighter shade of mood, particularly white, is that he is pure. He holds no hate, only foreboding. If Pipin loves God it’s up to the reader, and, on that, Love of God is known by most theist philosophies by “forever search.” The Nepalese priests don’t know God, nor do the Sufis of Chad, they may know less about God then the laymen, but their hearts bleed on and on for Him.

Pipin knows God. He saw His foot in the Pacific, and never knew anything else. He saw the thread spindle by and never saw anything else. And that is where I will close on the character of Pipin for now. Ahab, as I was saying, is the mayonnaise of the story. He is described a lot how he’s perceived by readers. Old greek hero: learned, lined face. A line in his description that stood out to me was when his appearance was compared to a broken doll for the thick white scar that runs down his face and neck. It is unknown whether it ran through his whole form. On broken dolls, Ahab is wounded both in the spirit and in the body. He misses a leg infamously licked off by his nemesis, and many scholars write on how this symbolises castration, but, in my opinion, isn’t so necessary because it’s connoted enough that his, um, phallus, Excuse my language, was damaged one horrid time. His prosthetic leg was “so violently displaced, that it had stake-wise smitten, and all but pierced his groin.” He was found somewhere layed unconscious alone in a freak accident.

The madness was planted not the hour when he lost his leg, but I’ll say it was placed after how his coworkers treated him as he was sore. Of course he was distressed, he was just after getting maimed by a leviathan. Then they leave him in the ship basement in a straitjacket for three months. A believable 20th century psychology experiment. And on that absurdity on both his freakout and the funny treatment others follows with, all ahab did was poke a little knife into moby’s thick skin; what’s six inches to a whale? the calf of a man it seems. And on this, I’ll say, especially on the last five chapters of the novel, it really tugged at my heart. How many people go mad over silly things and how many of them sit in their graves, over something so silly. The sober portrayal of madness in Moby Dick was new to me, and poor ahab, nothing was holding him back. I’m sure one of you here have tasted madness before and you’ll know how it wraps the particles in the air. You’ll be right till you’re wrong and by then it’s too late and everyone hates you and what’s left then but to kill the White Whale. Lucid or not, a self fulfilling ‘prophesy’. If you are mad, I am sorry. I was planning to add some quote about how ‘people that don’t go mad after adversity are unlucky’ or whatever but I think this one will be more appropriate for my case.

“I like to feel something in this slippery world that can hold, man.”

... What people do for truth. Sigh. If only the reformation didn’t happen.

A short wedge away from crazy Ahab now, a character I will pull in front will be Fedallah, the formally secret pagan accomplice of the captain. While I was washing my hair thinking about this text straight after I completed it, thinking about how phallic it is. There also happens to be no female characters obviously seeing the setting, now I could write about how all the maces and harpoons and daggers and such all the sperm and domination castration etc and I sure will, maybe, but a tidbit I dreamt up under bubbles of shampoo:

I feel ‘Fedallah’ is a very feminine character, how Ahab is an archetypal wounded masculin. He kind of works though him, teaching him the eastern ways of blood magic and all queer ideas on how to defeat the whale. On my observation of Fedallah being feminine, many people critique that this ‘Fedallah’ is orientalist. Someone wrote a whole paper on it, but I didn’t read it, Said’s book on Orientalism is enough, and yes I suppose one can see why someone else takes that view. A phantom parsee whom ‘Stubb’ and ‘Starbuck’ call the devil well before it’s open to see that they were right. He kind of slithers in and out, like a veiled witch in some western story about those Moroccan seductresses, feasting on the woes of a madman just getting eviler and eviler. Fedallah, as a character, I will make a joke now, maybe it was that unnamed wife of ahab’s in a strap on beard. It makes sense seeing how Old Testament the novel reads, Wicked Jezebel. Now. What do I write that hasn’t been written by others. another chapter I quite liked. Say, chapter 96 was memorable to me, really all the chapters in the early 90’s. Here’s an excerpt from this ninety six.

“Nevertheless the sun hides not Virginia's Dismal Swamp, nor Rome's accursed Campagna, nor wide Sahara, nor all the millions of miles of deserts and of griefs beneath the moon. The sun hides not the ocean, which is the dark side of this earth, and which is two thirds of this earth. So, therefore, that mortal man who hath more of joy than sorrow in him, that mortal man cannot be true—not true, or undeveloped. With books the same. The truest of all men was the Man of Sorrows, and the truest of all books is Solomon's, and Ecclesiastes is the fine hammered steel of woe. "All is vanity". ALL. This wilful world hath not got hold of unchristian Solomon's wisdom yet. But he who dodges hospitals and jails, and walks fast crossing grave-yards, and would rather talk of operas than hell; calls Cowper, Young, Pascal, Rousseau, poor devils all of sick men; and throughout a care-free lifetime swears by Rabelais as passing wise, and therefore jolly;—not that man is fitted to sit down on tomb-stones, and break the green damp mould with unfathomably wondrous Solomon. But even Solomon, he says, "the man that wandereth out of the way of understanding shall remain" (i. e. even while living) "in the congregation of the dead". Give not thyself up, then, to fire, lest it invert thee, deaden thee; as for the time it did me. There is a wisdom that is woe; but there is a woe that is madness. And there is a Catskill eagle in some souls that can alike dive down into the blackest gorges, and soar out of them again and become invisible in the sunny spaces. And even if he for ever flies within the gorge, that gorge is in the mountains; so that even in his lowest swoop the mountain eagle is still higher than other birds upon the plain, even though they soar.”

The sun doesn’t hide anything over ground, all encompassing to feed everyone vitamin D. The ending of this extract, narrated by Ishmael, suggests that some people get more vitamin D than others. This reads like a clever sermon and you’ll be sure to find other witty sermons, the one on Jonah ch.9.

I wanted to write about the character of ‘Starbuck’ now that I am thinking of preaching and morals. Starbuck is the yellow colour in the sandwich. He is the formal second-in-charge of the boat, and a pious Christian he is. His piety is seen in chapter 123 where he debates whether he kills his boss with his own musket in his sleep. He doesn’t kill Ahab, although he was noble to entertain it. I think the of Starbuck represents empathy. He worries for his friend’s soul, always telling him to come back to the Light but failing. A chapter where starbuck confronts Ahab once again, around the last 4 chapters, Ahab wept and admitted to his friend that maybe he didn’t want to chase on this suicide mission. Of course Ahab being Ahab he takes back his statement and goes back to being stoic but. Starbuck emphasised with the madman by reflecting what they both had in common; and we know most good holy people would brush a philistine off as a heathen with no humanity, and might even try to kill them not out of worry for their mortal soul, but from a sinister spot, hoping the wrongdoer burns in Hell. And on the topic of pagans, right and wrong, followers of old timey Nantucket christianity, presentations, we have a ‘Queequeg’ to stain the fresco with the shade of outsiders. I suppose Ishmael is an apparent outsider but only just to the reader. In the pretend word of Moby Dick he would had blended in just fine a tidy american boy. His name, like crazy Elijah and loony Ahab puts the nature of his background frankly. Not here or there, what morals he held, and geographical location, manhattan to God knows where. Ishmael bows down to his husbands idol goddess and seemed to want to do as he did until the idol goddess told him otherwise, and instead advised ‘queequeg’ to follow Ishmael.

Now, I could go on about how this character was ment to resonate to culturally Christian American western people, but that’s obvious and boring with “better a sober cannibal than a drunken Christian.”, But instead I will lend the map my meek mind interpreted while pondering ‘Queequeg’. I think maybe, if I were in charge of a modern adaption of the book, I would shift Queequeg into a “pointless migrant” from some place that isn’t war-torn or necessarily unpleasant but for some reason bleeds out immigrants like blood. Say, Albania. Excuse my rude language, it’s supposed to be wry. I say this not to make a geopolicical statement, it’s just, well, a modern Moby dick, surely a Polynesian devil worshipper would fain to be relevant. A hardworking young man from Timbuktu ready to die for his employers as long as he gets to mope around hostels, away from the oppression of his family. Something to think about, we don’t often hear the plights of these undesirables on euronews. In this modern Moby Dick the details of Queequeg’s past life would change but the structure would stay the same methinks. In the novel, he’s of noble stock. First in line to a barbarian throne to a cannibal kingdom. Dismayed with what he sees on his island he abandons its customs and goes abroad to see what life is like in the fabled new world. Poor fellow was in for a shock, turns out the Christians are so much worse than the pagans in daily life. While the cannibals may chop up and eat a person once every so often, Americans drink until they slobber and spit on others for being the wrong shade of brown. The story goes, the mere observation of it all makes ‘Queequeg’ feel so tainted to even return to what he escaped, so he put on the brimmed hat and linen and squawked how’de’ye’doo .. … that story was touching. as a younger girl the muslamic ways of my family made me sick. even now when I ponder on them too long the similar nausea manifests… but. I look out the window to see what the folk around me get up to. As much as culture and its rules may sting, imagine living without it? right now there’s a European girl finding this conclusion but vice versa. Fickle thing this all is. Now, that’s a theme touched on the text, how we really are all just copies of one another, shaped by circumstance. And on that, I’d imagine a modern Ishmael to look a bit like this:

art hoe kind of person.. r/redscarepod when it was still about art. And on art, this book, really, it’s nothing like how i describe it. It’s really beautiful. Maybe I’m a bad reader, I don’t know literature, but this one was different. Nothing washed over me like it before. And I know the novel isnt finished with me yet. Lord willing I’d be sure to pick it up again in a year. The text is thick with references and even though I might have caught the biblical ones, and the ones I did not understand were filled in via powermobydick.com. Maybe twelve months later I’ll be the wiser. On beautiful things, here’s a pick of three pretty book covers.

1. A unique rainbow. Oh! How come I wrote nothing about the whale! Wow. Here’s a excerpt that stood out to me about the creature.

“the White Whale tossed himself salmon-like to Heaven. So suddenly seen in the blue plain of the sea, and relieved against the still bluer margin of the sky, the spray that he raised, for the moment, intolerably glittered and glared like a glacier; and stood there gradually fading and fading away from its first sparkling intensity, to the dim mistiness of an advancing shower in a vale.”

a confession, picturing The Whale in my head while reading; it was not much like how it was described. Maybe its eye sockets were broader, but full of void. Misty, opaque poltergeist of pale pastels and whites. Kind of kawaii, but not so much a fish-mammal but an angel.

Adore the paper cutout impression the colouring produces. not much distinction between the ‘sky’ and the ‘sea’. Moby Dick could be flying.

Who’s the face supposed to represent? And the whale, that certainly cannot be Moby, because it’s hurt. I think the face is supposed to be Ishmael, the disheveled beard makes me wonder that it’s supposed to be him after a day or two floating in Queequeg’s coffin, after the Pequod sank. Look at those colours, those scraggly bruises look sore. Poor whale, I think it’s crying.

oh, sob, it moved me so much I wanted to make art about it, a collage was my first idea, but it occurred to me I don’t know how I’d execute that. Usually collages are reserved for art on different feelings. I was thinking maybe a video collage, a retelling of the novel though internet memes and pop culture moments. But what memes other than Dj Khalid clips would be added? So scrap that. A journalist would know.

useless note: this made me think of the character ‘Stubb.’ :

hardy harr harr, what were your thoughts on Stubb? Many reviewers found stubb a poopyhead, which he was, but an intresting poopyhead nonetheless. Unforgivable what he did to Pipin though.

This is the end of my observation. Thank you if you read all of this. Thanks. God bless.

“Heaven have mercy on us all—Presbyterians and Pagans alike— for we are all somehow dreadfully cracked about the head, and sadly need mending.”

#Moby Dick #Herman Meville

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