#not daily!!

[shitpostinguniverse]

[applejuiz]

Somehow, in 2022, Tumblr University finally exists, but the only offering is a semester long English course about Dracula and everyone is enrolled

[cookiesandcantarella]

we r besties

[ID: picture of Kermit and animal from the muppets hugging. Kermit is captioned with “me” and animal is captioned with “the beloved piece of media I would never ever recommend to anyone under any circumstances” end ID]

[citizen-zero]

I think the funniest possible modern textual adaptation of Dracula would be Jonathan as a part time recipe blogger and you have to scroll through 10 paragraphs of the most harrowing thing you’ve ever read in your life just to get the recipe for paprika hendl

[grumfield]

Had no idea Dracula Daily was a thing and just assumed the collective tumblr hive mind decided English realtor Jonathan Harker was the little meow meow du jour for no reason at all

[penny-anna]

so when Spider-man crawls up and down walls like a bug people praise him and call him a superhero, but when I, Count Dracula,

[khaliissa]

they're having a fundamentally different experience

[uchidachi]

My annotated Dracula has informed me that when Harker said his robber steak was “in the style of the London cat’s-meat!” he was referring to “A tradition in London was the “cat’s-meat man,” a vendor who sold little bits of meat on skewers for consumption by cats”

I am overjoyed by this knowledge that there were Victorians just randomly getting lil kebabs for their CATS

[cemeterything]

2018: you wake up one morning to discover that one of your mutuals has started posting almost exclusively about kpop

2022: you wake up one morning to discover that most of your dash and apparently nearly every active user on tumblr has started posting about their best friend jonathan harker having the weirdest trip of his life on his way to transylvania to visit count dracula. yeah that one.

[trupowieszcz-moved]

hey btw if you wanna read dracula in real time as it happens you can have the chapters delivered to you via e-mail by signing up here:

it's fun

[write-on-world]

[evilkitten3]

now that i think about it, jonathan harker would’ve been a great character in frankenstein. he’s so completely oblivious to dracula’s red flag parade that he’d probably completely avert the creature’s murderous rampage by accidentally befriending him after spending a page and a half writing about some weirdly tall homeless guy with daddy issues he ran into

[karis-the-fangirl]

My sister and I worked out the perfect cast for Muppet Dracula

[honorarycassowary]

[ID: two men on a bus meme. The smiling man looking out at the scenery is labeled “Jonathan Harker looking at the pretty mountains”. The sad man looking at the cliff face is labeled “Romanian peasants trying to avoid being eaten by vampires”.]

Jonathan Harker’s trip to Castle Dracula, summarized.

[zara2148]

Jonathan, looking out the window and once more watching Dracula scale the walls like a lizard:

[chipper-smol]

just a fuckin big bird