#now i want to message him again but i feel like thatd be weird

[mxcrayon]

losing my actual mind rn

i had this interaction in the dropout discord (i am the first and third person). short. simple. i only got the first year bc of a discount + a gift card i had, so i was planning on using this person's suggestion.

then, i got this.

oh my god!! how nice!! how sweet!!! how thoughtful!! i gave them my email and they sent over a subscription, i thanked them profusely. i was very grateful, very touched.

hours and hours later i was still thinking about it and i recalled how, in the email id gotten about it, it said "tao yang sent you a subscription" and id seen that and thought "oh haha like the tao yang" and then moved on

but now, thinking back, i was like.... theres no way, so i googled tao yang.

......

TAO YANG BOUGHT ME A FUCKING ANNUAL DROPOUT SUBSCRIPTION

[tiredestsleepiestgirl]

vent.

my partner and i r long distance. when we were getting to know each other online neither one of us wanted to be in any relationship ever but were doing like casual non monogamy irl.

we met in person and he got real weird about me talking about ppl id been regularly hooking up with and after i got back home and we made our relatinship official we also agreed to be basically monogamous. the exception being i wanted to be able to makeout with ppl drunk just 4 funsies, and even this had a lotta strings attached bc he was uncomfortable with it, i laid out that it could only be in public spaces and thered b no handsy stuff.

i wasnt a huge fan of the idea of being monogamous but i was willing to do it 4 him. i also said at the same time that i wouldnt mind if he did want to screw around a bit but he said he doubted thatd happen. cut to a like six months later and he's out clubbing and asks if im alright for him to go home with someone. i say yes thats fine and he goes home with a couple. later i say ive changed my mind and imbalance actually does make me uncomfortable and i dont want it to happen again and he says he's been thinking that he actually would be alright with me sleeping with other people while we're long distance.

now during the last six months since ive been back home we've been calling for multiple hours almost daily, first couple of months it was daily and then when i started working more itd be whenever i wasnt working so at least four days a week and on days i was working we'd still try to get in a short call. and i knew he'd get angsty when he couldnt talk to me over the weekend or if i was busy so id try not to make plans in the evenings too often. and ive been sick for like the last month so havent been able to spend time with ppl in real life. and he's been out more and more with this couple he's befriended.

and im happy for him bc he has trouble maintaining stable friendships and is often so lonely. and i was always the one that felt overwhelmed by calling so often when id had a long day at work or whatever. but now i feel. jarringly alone. and also like the only reason im allowed to sleep around now is bc he's find someone he wants to fuck and the second that changes itll b back to monogamy.

i care for him so much i want to hold him and protect him and i want him to be able to find friendship and community but god it sucks that im just stuck here in bed or at working just waiting for when he'll be able to give me attention again. im happy he's making friends and spending time with them i really want that for him. everything he's doing is stuff i want for him.

but also im out here working 5-7 shifts a week. to help pay for his visit in august. and our future visa costs. and waiting on him. and when would i even find time to sleep around. sunday night i was lying in bed after working my least favourite shift on the week on three hours of sleep and my chest rattling from my stupid chest infection and i knew he was out with his new friends so i didnt bother him.

monday another shift but he was barely replying to my messages all day even whenni said i was worried and didnt know if he was okay and then find out the next day that ofc he slept over on sunday night and spent monday with them. weve talked about that and he said hell tell me when he has plans but even that makes me feel so desperate and needy that's not my usual vibe. im just. ugh.

anyway he's just asked if he can spend the day hanging out with them today, my freeest day to talk of the week. and im a cool girl. i said im so glad ur having such a good time. im so glad u have friends and r working out (theyre going climbing), i hope ull be back in the evening for me? yesyes probably maybe? probably i will have him back with me tonight. coolcoolcoolcool. im gonna be working the next three days str8. the weekends r so busy for me. 4 shifts in 3 days baby. ill miss u ill miss u.

[honestlyandrogynousnightmare]

magic reveal

So ive been thinking about the magic reveal we did get and also the different magic reveals we COULD have gotten so i thought id project all my thoughts into another massive tumblr rant:

personally, i dont think the magic reveal was bad at all. yes, i wouldve done it slightly differently, i think it was done way too late in the show and left little time to explore how that reveal affected merlin and arthurs relationship, and obviously we never actually ended up seeing if magic was legalised and all. but i dont hate the magic reveal we got. the key part i really love is that it was done on Merlins own terms, he could have just lied, but instead he finally told Arthur the truth and i think that there were many reasons for that decision being made. 

firstly, Merlin definitely felt guilty and blamed himself for Arthur being stabbed, he must have at least partly blamed himself because everything he did directly led to Mordred turning into a little shit. Part of him might have just felt as if he owes Arthur that explanation yknow. secondly, i feel like by that point he was tired of lying in general, he needed to get that secret off his chest. those two things combined with the fact that Arthur was dying may have pushed him to telling the truth,  because deep down he did know that it was probably the last chance to tell Arthur the truth. 

i liked how they presented Arthurs reaction too, the clear message there was that Athur was angry at the lying, thats the part he saw as betrayal, not the magic itself. he didnt want to believe that Merlin was a liar, when he always saw him as the one person that was entirely honest with him. hell, he still trusted him enough to send him back to Camelot and Gwen so he knew Merlin wasnt evil. If the writers actually did a good job at developing Arthurs character, i feel like itd be more obvious that Arthurs stance on magic was different from his fathers, but yknow bbc and their shoddy writing. I love that moment of acceptance as well, when he tells Merlin that he doesnt want him to change. He doesnt even now about all the things Merlin sacrificed and lost in order to protect Arthur and Camelot but he still accepts him. I think that when he first fund out it was all like “holy crap i dont even know him” but after spending a few hours with Merlin he realises that its still the exact same person he knew the week before. 

anddddd as much as i like the way they did that magic reveal, the ending of the show left me with no closure and a lot of tears. my ideal magic reveal wouldve happened earlier, either at the start of season 5 or near the end of season 4. It would give us a chance to see them talk it out, and god we know that there would be arguing, and if arthur wasnt dying he would probbaly be shouting but the key part here is that arthur wouldnt hurt merlin. i think he culd consider sending him away if his father was still king just to protect him but we all know merlin would reply with “no <3″. but since i cant see the reveal happening when uther is king, i will be ignoring that scenario. and again, theres many ways this could play out.

the one way that ive always found interesting was arthur figuring it out on his own, because he may be an idiot, but hes not stupid. *if you like this sort of thing read “so close and im halfway to it  on ao3, its a merthur fic and the magic reveal in that one makes me cry so much and the fic is so well written* I feel like at one point, he would just put the pieces together, and it would all make so much sense to him? Merlins random disappearances and scars would make sense, the luck he had when it came to fights, Merlins weird reactions when someone mentioned magic, how on earth merlin of all people managed to survive every battle and fight arthur was in when some of his best knights didnt. 

then theres the very cliche “merlin using magic mid battle to save everyone” reveal. because its mid battle, i really cant picture them talking it out there lol,  i picture a lot of ignoring but also if other people saw him using magic, we all know the first thing arthur would do is give the knights a good old “if you kill him i will kill you and then myself”, it wouldnt be until later that they would actually talk. 

and then like the canon magic reveal, theres Merlin doing it on his own terms. i personally really like thhis one because it gives him so much more control over the situation and over his words. *another fic rec here if you like this sorta thing, its called “to the world that let you by” and its really beautiful and made me cry at 1am so there you go, and as you guessed it, its another merthur*. i love this reveal because it gives merlin a chance to explain, and arthur a chance to listen and try to understand. 

now there are loads of different sub categories that could go into those, like Arthur finding merlin creating butterflies out of thin air lol, but i wont go into those. whatever reveal would happen, i feel like “the talk” after would usually end up in a similar way. Arthurs reaction would be similar to what we got in the canon reveal, because the actual magic isnt what would hurt most.  it would be the lies. Arthur has been lied to and betrayed by so many people you cant really expect him not to react badly to being lied to. the magic sure would confuse him and put him in a difficult position, because you have to keep in mind that his entire life he has been told that magic is pure evil, and to him, merlin is the polar opposite of that. i think it would just make him question everything, like does he even know this man? has he won any of his battles or has it always been merlin? why is he in camelot? why would a sorcerer be serving him? but he wouldnt hurt him. he wouldnt even consider that imo, sure, he will demand an explanation, but he wouldnt actually thin about hurting him. 

and merlin would understand why hes angry about the lying, that much is obvious. and he would be reluctant to tell arthur about the things that were happening behind his back all those years, but he would be honest. and go that conversation would be hard for both of them, i cant really imagine them having it without a lot of crying, shouting and even more wine tbh. arthur isnt good at listening which is why this would be so hard for him too, but merlin has to be honest, completely honest with arthur for the first time in his life and thatd be difficult. 

and i think merlin would handle arthurs reactions well, even if arthur decided to lose his temper lol. but i can still imagine him being a bit bitter if arthur judged his choices and stuff when it came to poisoning morgana and freeing the dragon, asking what on earth HE would do in that situation. where the only choices he sees are bad ones, and he has to pick the one thats least evil. 

arthur would probably be most pissed off at the thing about his mother tbh, because merlin outright lied there, usually its just deflecting but he made that deliberate choice to lie. but i really do think he would understand all of this, while not every choice merlin did was good, he did it with good intention. 

and then arthur would remove the ban on magic and they would kiss and get married amd live happily ever aft-

thanks bbc.

anyway if you want any more magic reveal fics (or links to the ones i mentioned, ao3 can be bloody annoying sometimes) feel free to comment or message me or anything, i have a couple more in my bookmarks. 

thanks for reading this rant, scuse the bad grammar, id love to hear your thoughts and opinions on this and magic reveals in general so feel free to comment! have a great day<3

[unfavorablesemiconductor]

more info on me and spirits when i was a kid...id love to hear thoughts on what was happening!!

i think i might have (but i dont want to claim i for sure did, thatd be lying, since i don't know for sure!!) had some sort of spirit sensitivity as a kid, but i dont think I have it anymore if i ever did. but i had lots of dreams i felt were dream visitations, and my whole family experienced the same haunting in my childhood home without actually even telling each other until years after we had moved out. but all the details were the same...a little boy in our downstairs playroom. i feel like he wanted friends...but hurt so much he ended up scaring us, always. im sorry P... that's my nickname for the spirit for now! i hope he did make friends. i still have dreams touched by his shadows sometimes. the consuming shadow on the stairs, the basement of a 70s house. always think of him! i hope he's not still upset...

when i was little i also talked to people i couldn't see, and would insist that there were people there. i had no history of hallucinations then (I have minor ones now, due to seizures and head injury. i often smell lemons before i have one) so i dont know what else explains it.

i often felt, and still feel, like something in the environment, something alive, has messages it wants me to pass onto people, like it's nagging me...

and its weird...i am having those feelings again lately...like i know someone is with me. i feel like that a lot. or when you go in a certain spot...and you feel something about it, right? its like a pressure change in the head.

but i dont know. and i really don't want to claim i can do something i cant!! does anyone with more knowledge have any thoughts?

[junetuesday]

sweetener - [three]

The One At The Library

Pairing: Tom Holland x Female Reader - uni AU

Word Count: 5170 ish

Warnings: swearing, alcohol, fluff, caffeine

A/N: sorry for the delay on this i am *jean ralphio voice* The Worst. I thiiiink this chapter should make up for it tho heheheh lemme know what you think!

Updates Fridays at 11pm BST

Tonight was one of those nights where it just wasn't your night. You stood in the SU toilets waiting for Liv, amid girls taking selfies in the mirrors and attempting to stick false eyelashes back on each other though they could hardly see. Another night, you might have been one of them, gleefully exclaiming "thanks, it's Missguided!" in response to compliments on your dress. Not tonight though.

There wasn't anything wrong per se - Madison was away visiting her boyfriend so it was just you and Liv with some of her friends from her course. They were nice, of course, and you liked them, but they weren't your friends so you didn't feel quite as at ease as you might have. Your pre-night out disco-nap had run on a bit longer than you had intended so you didn't have a lot of time to get ready, plus you thought you had alcohol in when you didn't, so all you had was a glass of warm, somewhat vinegary white wine while you got ready. You managed to pilfer another glass off someone at predrinks, and you'd bought a double when you arrived at the union, but all in all you were relatively sober compared to everyone else, and you weren't feeling particularly confident in your appearance, and honestly, you were bored.

You tapped through Instagram stories as you waited for Liv, neither drunken selfies nor dog photos nor influencers unboxing PR packages holding your attention for long. Your thumb hit the right hand side of the screen almost as soon as each new image came up, switching to the next one well before the full 15 seconds was up. Until this one.

A few nights prior, you, Liv, and Mads had gone on a social media binge after Liv had discovered that you and Harrison followed each other on Instagram and you hadn't told her (?!) - which had lead you to Tom's account. Madison had pressed follow for you in the end, and within ten minutes he'd followed you back. You still hadn't had the confidence to interact with him in any way, or text him for that matter, but it was a start. He'd posted a couple of stories since then, and to say you were glad that Instagram didn't show how many times someone has viewed your story would be an understatement. If it did...yikes. They weren't even all that interesting, but seeing little snippets of his life was nice, it almost made you feel like you knew him a little more. You didn't, of course, all you actually knew was that he went to the gym after work yesterday (from the picture of a protein shake with an 8:49pm timestamp with the caption "post-work gym sesh ☑") and that he'd been working on an essay this afternoon (from the screenshot of a Spotify playlist called Chill Lofi Study Beats with the caption "essay soundtrack 👌" and a location tag that placed him in the library).

And according to this post, he was still there - his laptop open with a notepad next to it, a couple of books and pens scattered across the desk, posted five minutes ago. You tapped through to the next picture, and all you could think was 'oh no'. This one was a selfie, his grumpy expression half covered by his fingers and his chin resting on his palm. His hair was a fluffy mess atop his head, white earphones in both ears and the collar of a black pullover hoodie just visible in the bottom of the frame. You didn't even realise you'd been looking at it that long until the screen skipped to the next story, and you didn't think you'd ever tapped the left side of your screen so fast. Pressing and holding on the screen to stop it timing out, you managed to actually read the caption this time - "send help and coffee 😧" - and maybe those three drinks had had more of an effect on you than you thought, because you were actually kind of considering replying, your thumb swiping up and down on the screen to bring up and hide the 'reply to story' options over and over. No, that's a stupid idea -- what would you even say?

Looking up as though one of the inhabitants of the girl's bathroom would have the answer, you spotted Liv coming out of a cubicle. She had definitely caught up with her friends at predrinks more than you had, and was bopping along to the music echoing in from the adjacent dancefloor as she washed her hands. She'd be badgering you to go get another drink, you knew, or go and dance, or something of that nature that didn't involve you sitting down and pondering potential social media interactions. You looked from her to your phone and back again, before deciding to throw caution to the wind and just say fuck it.

Vanilla latte sound good?

Closing the app and locking your phone as soon as you hit reply, you shoved your phone into your bag, as though if you didn't look at it then it wouldn't matter if Tom replied or not. Oh God, what if he doesn't reply? -- what if he does reply? What if--

"Let's get SHOTS!"

With a groan and a playful roll of your eyes you let Liv pull you back out to the bar, rejoining her friends. You ordered a shot of apple Sourz - which, yes, is a cop out shot, but you didn't particularly care to go for the sambuca shots that were lining up on the counter at Liv's request. Even if you weren't having one, though, it still made for a fun Instagram story - because even if you're not having fun it's important to make sure it looks like you are online, right? That was the only reason you took your phone back out of your bag, no other reason. You didn't even look at your notifications, not even a glance at that little red (1) in the top right hand corner, and you definitely didn't open it immediately after posting your story. No, you waited at least ten seconds while everyone took their shots, then you opened it.

That would be ideal🙏🏻

Hm. Liv tugged on your wrist again, pulling you towards a clubroom. Reluctantly, you followed, your group huddled loosely in a circle on the dancefloor. You moved your body to the beat, but your mind was less on the music and more on your phone, clutched tightly in your hand.

You knew he meant coffee, you knew it was a joke, but...Tom had been calling you Vanilla Latte until recently... But no. That's stupid, it's gone midnight and he's still studying, he definitely was just talking about coffee, he didn't mean, well, you. But still...

You glanced down at your phone, trying to be as inconspicuous as possible (though no one was watching, and if they were they wouldn't care, like, at all), and let out an involuntary squeak at the notification on the screen.

tomholland1996 replied to your story:

or a couple of those haha 😂

Not to read too much into things but... double message? You bit the corner of your lip to try and stop yourself from smiling as you unlocked your phone and tapped out a reply.

I bet haha

Your thumb hovered over the 'send' button, hesitating. What a shit reply - but what else do you say?

Tom is typing...

Oh shit. You deleted your message, but as soon as you did so he stopped typing too. Ugh. You waited a moment, and sure enough:

Tom is typing...

Anyway enjoy your night x

You almost scoffed, looking up and taking stock of your surroundings, that weird out of place feeling you get when you're the only sober(ish) one in a room of drunk people creeping over you. The music was too loud and too bassy, the lights were too flashy, everyone was bumping into you, plus your feet hurt and you were tired and you felt about fifty years older than your nineteen years.

🤷 su's actually shit tonight tbf

You tried to ignore the fact that 'seen' popped up under your message instantly.

Really? Sure its better than the library

Hm. Another elbow collided with your spine, and you decided then you were done with tonight.

Debatable

You know when youre just not feelin it?

You were barely even pretending to move to the music now, just nodding your head as your attention remained on your phone. It seemed to be getting more and more crowded anyway, so you hardly had any room to move even if you wanted to.

Fair

Think i'd just rather be doing anything other than writing this essay

Idk if id go so far as to say id rather be writing an essay but it'd defo rather be in bed 😴👵

Oh yeah thatd be my preferred choice too but i guess i'll just have to make do with coffee instead of sleep

Why dont you just go home tho?

That was a good point, you could go home. You didn't think Liv would mind, she was having fun and her friends lived close enough that sharing a cab home with them wouldn't be an issue. The only problem was, you didn't really want to go home - what you wanted to do was go and hang out with Tom. Not while he was working, or for five minutes when you bumped into him in the kitchen, but just...because. You nibbled at your bottom lip as you considered your options, flashing a smile-and-nod at Liv when she looked over at you and you lipread her shouting 'you okay?' at you. The library was just across the car park in the center of the campus, you could just pop in and say hello... and the coffee from the Lavazza branded machine downstairs in the SU was better than the weird generic one in the library.

I actually might you know

You typed out the next message really fast, taking a deep breath in before pressing send.

Could bring you a coffee on my way past?

Eyes trained on the screen, you held your breath as Tom is typing... popped up, disappeared, reappeared, then disappeared again.

You would be saving my life

Aaaand exhale.

Only seems fair

You'd almost forgotten where you were, if it weren't for the people jostling you around and the balls of your feet screaming in pain from your heels.

Haha yeah i think you probably owe me a latte or 7

Your heart was beating in your chest, and this was definitely how you saw your night going when you gulped down that glass of tepid chardonnay, but you couldn't say you were mad about it.

Exactly

So a latte then yeah?

Wait youre actually gonna ditch a night out and bring me a coffee?

Yep, that's exactly what you're doing.

Apparently so

Then yes a latte pls

Coming right up (that's what baristas say right?)

God how fucking cringe --

I think so idk im not a very good one

Youre ok

cheers

Weaving your way away from the group, you mimed taking a drink at Liv when she grabbed your arm as you passed her. You weren't really lying, you were going to get a drink, it was just going to be a caffeinated one instead of an alcoholic one. You couldn't be bothered explaining that to her right now, though, and she was already turning back to her friends and taking one of their faces in her hands to yell lyrics at them, so you didn't feel too bad about leaving her.

Your feet hurt a little less (only a little though) as you made your way down the stairs, and you only got a few weird looks as you got two lattes from the coffee machine. You got rather more weird looks, however, when you walked into the library. There was hardly anyone there at this time, just a handful of zombie-like students dotted around and a couple of security staff at the door keeping an eye on things, but every single one of them looked at you at least once as you meandered over to where Tom had told you he'd be. You couldn't really blame them though, it was gone midnight and there you were, clip-clopping through the university library in absurd heels and a dress that showed rather more of your skin than you would normally have exposed in that setting. You felt a little self-conscious, but with a cup of coffee in each hand you couldn't pull it down, so you had to make do with taking short, shuffling steps to try and minimise how far up your thighs the fabric would ride as you walked.

Just as he'd said, you found Tom at a table in the group study area. Books, balled up sheets of paper, pens and empty drinks cans littered the desk, looking rather more disorderly than his Instagram story had depicted. He hadn't seen you yet, and he looked to be deep in thought. Hunched over his laptop, the glow of the screen reflected in his glasses, his fingers were spread out across the keyboard as though he was about to start typing. In the time it took you to walk over, however, he didn't press a single key, and when you set one of the cups down beside him he jumped slightly, taking a sharp breath in like you'd startled him. Less 'deep in thought' and more 'in a deep trance', perhaps.

Tom groaned when you giggled, pulling his earphones from his ears and blinking rapidly to try and reawaken his eyes.

"You're a lifesaver, thank you."

He gave you a small smile as he reached for his coffee, his face tired but eyes still bright as he looked up at you. You could feel his gaze scanning over your body, making you feel a different kind of self-conscious - the kind that made you smooth out your dress to sit nicely across your thighs now that you had a free hand, rather than tugging it down as far as it would go like you wanted to when you walked in.

"No worries."

Hovering awkwardly beside the desk, it only then occurred to you that Tom probably wanted you to leave so he could get on with his essay and get out of the library as quickly as possible. He seemed to sense this train of thought from you, because he hummed something incoherent through a mouthful of coffee and scrambled to move some of his crap aside so there was space for you to sit at the table.

"Sorry--"

"Oh, um-"

You did a sort of half-laugh, stepping back out of the way to let him push papers and books aside. There were about six chairs dotted around the table, but as he'd cleared a space at the one closest to him, just around the corner of the square table, you picked that one.

"How's it going?" You took a sip of your own coffee, nodding towards the laptop between you. "-or should I not ask?"

"Ugh, don't ask." Tom groaned, leaning back and bringing his leg up so his foot rested on his chair, bent knee exposed by the rips in his faded black jeans. "S'not even due 'til next week but I thought I'd just get it done and out of the way 'cause I've got work and shit to do but..."

He trailed off, shrugging.

"Not happening?"

"Not happening."

You hummed, clicking your tongue against the roof of your mouth. You knew the feeling, no stranger to complete lack of motivation yourself. Looking around at the books scattered across the table, you realised you didn't actually know what Tom studied, but it seemed like he didn't really want to talk about uni work, so instead of asking about his degree, you said:

"I didn't know you wore glasses."

Nice nonsequiteur, good one.

"Hm? Oh, yeah," Tom took the frames off and set them down on his laptop keyboard, rubbing the inner corners of his eyes with his knuckles. "Just for computer stuff, you know?"

"Oh, cool." You looked down at your cup as you brought it up to your lips. "I like them. On - on you."

Your eyes flicked over to him as you took a sip, darting back to your cup before he could catch your eye.

"Thanks."

You just smiled, hoping the general feeling of '!!!!!!!' in your head wasn't evident on your face.

"So, SU not living up to your expectations tonight?"

Shaking your head, you set your cup down before launching into an explanation of everything that had contributed to your less-than-satisfactory night. You didn't mean to go off on one, but Tom was laughing at how exasperated you were getting about tiny inconveniences, and before you knew it, you'd been rambling for God knows how long, which lead to Tom ranting about all the annoying things he'd witnessed people doing in the library that afternoon, and before long an hour had passed and the conversation had turned, as it often does with millenials, to memes.

"Wait you haven't seen that one? It's fucking hilarious, I've got it saved on my phone so I can look at it, like, daily."

You opened your bag to take out your phone, your smile freezing on your lips as a thought crossed your mind. Unzipping the inside pocket, your fingers skipped over the contents one by one - lipgloss, lash glue, gum, tampon - until your suspicions were confirmed.

"Oh fuck."

Tom hummed a question mark in response, eyebrows raised at your sudden shift in temperament.

"I haven't got my house keys," you frowned, trying to remember the last time you saw them.

"Shit - d'you reckon you dropped them in the union?"

"Nah," You shook your head as it came back to you - you were in a rush to shove your stuff into your bag before leaving for predrinks, and you distinctly remembered thinking 'I need to grab my keys from my backpack', but then Liv asked to borrow a lipstick and you immediately forgot about your keys.

"I know where they are, they're at home. It's cool I'll just text Liv and see if she's still out or what, maybe get a cab home with her."

After tapping out a quick text to Liv, you looked back to Tom, setting your phone facedown on the table. He was looking at you questioningly, glancing between you and your phone. You blinked at him uselessly, mind drawing a blank when you attempted to remember why exactly you opened your bag in the first place.

"Uh, you were gonna show me..." he trailed off, gesturing to your phone.

Uhhh duhhhhhhhh. Jesus girl, get it together.

Re-engaging your brain, you pulled up the screenshot, hoping he couldn't feel the heat radiating off your cheeks or notice the way your fingers were trembling ever so slightly as they gripped your phone. Either he didn't or he declined to comment on it, showing you a vine compilation video on his laptop instead. You ended up burrowing deeper and deeper into a meme-rabbit-hole, shifting closer to the edge of your seat with each embarrassingly loud laugh, and for a little while you forgot about your key dilemma.

"I think-" you began, interrupted by your fifth yawn in as many minutes. "I think I need to go to bed."

"Same - hey did Liv text you back?"

"Shit. Uhh-"

You checked your notifications, and sure enough there was one from Liv, received twenty-five minutes ago.

No lmao debrief tomo xxxxxx

You didn't realise Tom was reading over your shoulder until you heard a soft 'ah' in your ear. Your eyes scanned the rest of the screen in a panic, but thankfully found no incriminating evidence of your growing interest in the boy beside you, or of Liv's in his best friend. Making a slightly strangled 'hmm' sound, you tapped the phone icon at the top of the screen.

"I'll call her and see what-"

You'd barely brought the phone to your ear before a cool voice welcomed you to O2 voice mail. You knew it all too well - Liv was notorious for letting her battery die, preferring to use that last 2% on Snapchat than saving it in case one of her housemates gets locked out.

"Bollocks."

"She alright?" Tom leaned back in his seat, concern ghosting over his tired features.

"Yeah yeah, she was with a load of her friends so they've probably gone back to one of theirs to smoke or something. She'll be fine. I'm kinda fucked, though."

A beat of silence passed while you tried to come up with a solution that didn't involve you sleeping in the library, but with Madison miles away and Liv MIA, you were coming up blank.

"You can stay at mine?"

Sorry, what? You blinked at Tom, certain you had misheard him.

"If-if you want. I could sleep on the sofa or something and you could have my room."

Yep, no, that's what he said.

"Oh, I-"

"Just, um, you know, if you can't go home-"

"Would, uh, is that okay?"

"Yeah," He nodded, a soft smile in his voice. " 'course."

You bit down gently on your bottom lip, your own smile threatening to spread across your face.

"Thanks."

Your voice came out as barely more than a whisper, a squeak really. He was still so close, your shoulders almost touching where you'd been looking down at your phone together. This felt much closer though, face to face, your eyes able to count the freckles smattered across his nose and cheeks, see the indent of a chickenpox scar near his right eyebrow, another one on the left side of his nose. You didn't dare let your vision travel any further south than the bridge of his nose, not sure of what you'd do if you looked down and saw that easy smile that he wore so well.

But then again, maybe you could just sneak a glance...

Tom cleared his throat, the sound making both of you jolt back ever so slightly into your seats.

"Um, should we-"

"Yeah, yeah-"

Silence settled over you as you gathered up Tom's stuff off the table, stopping to shove your coffee cups and all his other rubbish into a bin on the way out. By the time you got to Tom's car though, conversation had started to flow again, and he gave you free rein over the music, so the short drive passed with only mild awkwardness between you.

Tom's bedroom turned out to be behind the locked door you'd seen that first night at predrinks, the mystery room on the ground floor at the front of the house. Unsure of the social protocol in situations like this, you hovered by the door as Tom turned on the lamp on his bedside table, dumping his stuff on the floor by his desk. The lamp didn't provide too much light, most of the room still shrouded in darkness, so you focused your attention on the carpet by your feet, fibres frayed where they met the skirting board.

"Do you want Super Noodles?"

Your head jerked up, a laugh spluttering past your lips because what? But then, also, yes, yes you did want Super Noodles.

"Yeah, actually."

"D'you wanna put something on TV and I'll..." he trailed off, pointing in the general direction of the kitchen.

"Sure."

You perched on the end of Tom's bed while he fiddled with his TV and PS4 that sat atop a chest of drawers opposite you, bringing up Netflix and passing you the controller.

"D'you know how to..."

"Mmhmm."

"Cool."

You flicked the edges of the shoulder buttons with your fingers, the soft clicks the only sound beyond the hum of the TV as you looked up at Tom from the edge of his bed, nodding his head slowly as he shoved his hands into the pockets of his jeans. He cleared his throat again, taking a jerky step away from you.

"Okay, uh, I'll just- yeah."

Letting out a deep breath once he'd left the room, you started to flick through the options on the screen. You eventually settled on Friends - everyone likes Friends, plus then it wasn't a whole movie or hour long episode you'd have to sit through if it got awkward. You hoped it wouldn't be awkward, things had been getting progressively less awkward between you, but this was different. You were in his room at two in the morning, sat on his bed in a rather revealing dress, more of your bare thigh in contact with the soft cotton of his sheets than you had expected when you left the house earlier that evening. That reminded you - were you going to sleep in your dress? It wasn't very comfortable so you'd really rather not, but were you going to ask him for something to wear? Were you bollocks. So, you'd resigned yourself to being uncomfortable and hoping that nothing popped out in the night when Tom returned from the kitchen, backing into the room with a bowl of noodles in each hand.

"Thanks," you gave him a shy smile as you took one of the bowls from him, the heat of the ceramic almost as hot as the flush that crept up the back of your neck when he smiled back.

"Do you want something else to wear?" Tom's eyes widened as soon as the words left his mouth, realising how they sounded. "Not that you don't look- it's just it doesn't look that comfortable, and-"

"Yes, please."

"Okay," he breathed when you cut him off, nodding. "Um..."

Setting his bowl on top of his chest of drawers, he rummaged through for something to give you. His figure was obscured by the light of the TV screen, the bright white of the Netflix logo blurring the edges of your vision. You had to blink a few times after he turned around before you could see properly again, as though you'd just looked directly into the sun.

Stop blinking so much, he's going to think you've got a twitch, or an eye infection or something.

Trying to keep your eyes open as long as possible (without looking shocked), you swapped your bowl for the t shirt and pair of blue checked pyjama bottoms he handed you.

"I'll just go, uh, get changed then."

Shutting Tom's door behind you, you darted upstairs to the bathroom. You had no idea if Harrison was in or not, but you would really rather not bump into him just then, knowing he'd be insufferable. After changing into Tom's clothes (definitely not noticing how they smelt innately comforting, fresh but still warm) you peeled off your false eyelashes, popping them into your handbag. That was about all you could do in terms of make up removal, so you just had to hope you had remembered to put on setting spray earlier and that you wouldn't wake up with panda eyes and a stained pillow case.

Tom had turned the light off and changed into a pair of joggers when you got back to his room, settled at the head of the bed atop the covers with just the glow of the TV lighting the room and reflecting off his glasses. Placing your bag and folded dress beside your heels on the floor by the door, you sat cross-legged beside him, taking the bowl he handed you with a quiet thanks. You munched your way through your noodles as the first episode played, sneaking glances at the boy beside you every now and then.

By the time the second episode started, two empty bowls were stacked on the bedside table, and you were getting sleepier and sleepier, pulling the covers up over your legs. You slipped further and further down the bed as the episode went on, your eyes growing heavier and heavier until you were almost asleep.

"I'm just gonna..." you sighed, rolling into your side and curling your legs up closer to your chest.

"I'll uh- I'll go."

The mattress dipped as Tom pushed himself up, moving to get up, but you shook your head, eyes still closed.

"Mmmno."

Tom froze, a nervous laugh stuttering from the back of his throat.

"What?"

Half-asleep, you looked up at him, sliding your hand across the mattress and under your cheek beneath the pillow.

"Stay."

You thought you heard him make a sound, but your eyes were already closing again, your mind too sleepy to comprehend anything beyond the fact that his body was warm beside yours and you didn't want him to leave. The whys and hows weren't too important just then.

The bed shifted a few more times as Tom reached for the remote to turn off the TV and set his glasses aside, letting out a low, deep breath as he lay down next to you. You were all but asleep, so you weren't sure if you imagined it, but you thought you felt his hand brush against yours as he mirrored your position, lying on his side with an arm curled up under his pillow.

Hm.

You stuck out your little finger to test, just to see - and sure enough, it bumped against his. Still half-asleep (or at least, that would be your excuse if he moved away), you lifted your finger up to lay it over his, feeling his digit flex as he hooked it around yours. That, you were pretty sure, you didn't imagine.

You really were tired, honestly so so close to being asleep, but now all you could hear was your breathing, and Tom's breathing, and the hammering of your heart in your chest, and it was all a bit much.

You opened one eye, and from the slither of light coming in around the curtains from the streetlamp outside you could just about make out one side of Tom's face - enough to know he was looking at you.

"Hi," he breathed.

"Hey."

Your eyes closed when he'd repositioned, you hadn't realised quite how close your faces were, only the width of your hands between you. Nibbling on your bottom lip, you glanced between his eyes, fixed on yours, and his lips, slightly parted.

Is he getting closer??

You tried to regulate your breathing, but he was definitely getting closer, and you could feel the warmth of his breath on your lips as you swallowed harshly.

"S-sorry you didn't get to finish your essay."

Tom chuckled softly, and your noses were almost touching, and suddenly his hand was gone from beside yours under the pillow, a finger hooked under your chin instead.

"It's fine."

Nudging the side of your nose with his, he tilted your face up and away from the pillow, the quiet 'oh' dying on your lips as he captured them between his own.

Oh, indeed.

⋘TWO | FOUR⋙

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[perfectlyrose]

wrong number, right person

Summary: Complete accident brings Rose and John into each other’s lives by way of a misdialed phone number but as they form a friendship that could bloom into love, it almost seems more like fate.

Pairing: Ten x Rose || Rating: All ages || Word Count: 4264

Note: For Day Seven of 31 Days of Ficmas: prompt “ring.” This is... so much longer than I intended it to be when I started writing lol. - tagging @doctorroseprompts for the event :)

AO3

Rose answered her phone without looking to see who was calling, assuming it was Jack for the third time that evening. “I told you Jack, I can’t come out tonight, I’ve got homework and a bloody astronomy exam tomorrow I need to revise for.”

“Um, I think I have the wrong number but I could probably give you some tips on astronomy if you need them,” a male voice on the other end of the line that was decidedly not Jack said.

“Oh my god, I’m sorry. My friend has been calling me non-stop trying to get me to go clubbing with him tonight and I just assumed he was trying again,” Rose said, cheeks heating.

“No need to apologize! I’m the one who dialed wrong and interrupted your revising,” the man said, very cheerful for someone talking to a stranger.

“It wasn’t going well, so I really don’t mind.”

“I meant it when I said I could give you some astronomy tips. I umm… I might have a doctorate in the subject.” The last sentence came out in a rush, like he was nervous about admitting it.

“Really? You sure you’re not trying to impress some random girl on the phone?” Rose teased.

“Honestly, astronomy and astrophysics don’t usually do the trick.”

“Got degrees in both?”

“Yeah.”

“Bit brilliant, aren’t you?”

“Yeah.”

Rose laughed. “Alright mystery doctor, want to give an impromptu intro to astronomy lecture over the phone to a stranger?”

“Love to, actually. What unit is your exam on?”

“Honestly, if you can make parallax equations make sense I will probably propose marriage at this point,” Rose admitted. “I’m really lost.”

He laughed. “Proposing to me and you don’t even know who I am. Bit hasty but I like it.”

“Hey, I just said I might propose, no promises. Besides, this is dependent on your teaching skills.”

“I’ll have to be impressive then.”

“You better be, I’d like to pass this exam,” she shot back. “I’m Rose, by the way.”

“John, but you can keep calling me Doctor, if you want.”

She raised her eyebrows even though he couldn’t see. “Alright, Doctor.”

Rose could practically hear his smile.

“Alright, ready to learn?”

“I guess. Last chance and all that.”

“Brilliant!”

With that he launched into a lecture that was far more engaging than any of the actual classes Rose had attended. Her impromptu professor had a tendency to go off on tangents but also a knack for actually describing things in a way that made sense to her and by the end of the conversation, she actually felt like she might pass the test.

“Thank you so much,” she said, things winding to a close. They’d been talking for an hour at least. “You have definitely earned a potential marriage proposal.”

He laughed, the sound warm and low. “Wait and see if you actually pass that exam.”

“Seriously though, thank you.”

“You’re quite welcome.”

“I don’t know who you were trying to call but I’m really glad you rang me instead.”

“Me too.”

“Alight, goodnight then, Doctor.”

“Night, Rose.”

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

When Rose got her exam grade back and saw that she’d actually passed by more than a smidge, she quickly snapped a picture and texted it to her mystery caller.

Text to Space Doctor [5:32 pm]: <Image attached>

Text to Space Doctor [5:32 pm]: i passed! ready to accept my proposal?

Text to Starry Rose [5:36 pm]: Congratulations! Knew you could do it!

Text to Space Doctor [5:42 pm]: my prof is probably going to think i cheated

Text to Starry Rose [5:43 pm]: Nonsense! You’re brilliant!

Text to Space Doctor [5:45 pm]: science isn’t really my thing but thx

Text to Starry Rose [5:50 pm]: Feel free to call me up if you need help again. I’m happy to be of assistance.

Text to Starry Rose [5:54 pm]: If you want. That was probably weird to offer. Sorry. I just like to help and I enjoyed talking to you.

Text to Space Doctor [6:01 pm]: thatd be brilliant!!!! im def going to take you up on that

Text to Space Doctor [6:02 pm]: sorry cant chat rn. at my mums for dinner

Text to Starry Rose [6:02 pm]: Have fun! Look forward to talking again soon :)

Rose stowed her phone back in her purse and headed into the kitchen to help her mum with a smile on her face.

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

“You know, I never asked who you were trying to call when you ended up ringing me,” Rose said. “Last time, I mean. Obviously, since I called you this time.”

It was a couple weeks after that first call. They’d texted on and off about random things and Rose was really starting to consider him a friend despite never having laid eyes on him. With another exam looming, she’d called John up for another tutoring session.

“Oh, my sister, Donna. She wanted to try and talk me into coming to some dinner party so really you saved me,” he said, voice completely earnest.

“Happy to help.”

“Gracious of you. Ready to start?”

“Don’t need an offer of marriage beforehand?”

“I am a patient man, Rose,” he said loftily.

Rose snorted. “No you’re not. Even I could tell you that.”

“Rude.”

“Teach me of the stars oh wise, patient Doctor,” she intoned, laying the sarcasm on thick.

“Still rude but I’ll let it slide this time.”

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

Text to Space Doctor [8:34 pm]: i looked up the going rate for tutors and i’m really glad you aren’t charging me anything

Text to Starry Rose [8:37 pm]: Who says I’m not logging hours to bill you later?

Text to Space Doctor [8:41 pm]: would have to find an address for me to bill me :)

Text to Starry Rose [8:43 pm]: That /is/ a dilemma.

Text to Space Doctor [8:47 pm]: besides… i already offered to marry you in exchange for your services as tutor. not my fault you didn’t take me up on that excellent deal

Text to Starry Rose [8:50 pm]: I still could.

Text to Space Doctor [8:51 pm]: nope too late now. missed ur chance ;)

Text to Starry Rose [8: 54 pm]: A true tragedy.

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

“Oi! Spaceman, are you listening to me at all?”

John whipped his head up to give Donna a sheepish expression. “Yes?”

“You weren’t. You had that goofy smile on your face that means you were texting that Rose girl.”

“I did not!”

“You so did. When are you going to actually ask her out?”

He sighed. “I don’t even know if she’s in London, Donna. Can’t exactly take her to dinner if she’s not in the city.”

“But you do want to take her to dinner!” Donna crowed.

John rolled his eyes and pocketed his phone after shooting off a quick text to Rose. “Yes, fine. I’d like to actually meet her in person and maybe eat while doing so. Happy?”

“For now.”

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

Text to Starry Rose [10:21 am]: I wish I was anywhere except this meeting right now.

Text to Space Doctor [10:22 am]: probs better than my astronomy lecture

Text to Space Doctor [10:23 am]: i swear this guy doesn’t realize half the class is asleep

Text to Starry Rose [10:25 am]: I would MUCH rather be in an astronomy lecture right now.

Text to Space Doctor [10:26 am]: nerd

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

“Ooh, are you texting your mystery man again, Rosie?” Jack asked, leaning closer to her. They were out at the pub and crammed into a booth with three other people.

Rose rolled her eyes. “He is not my mystery man. He’s just a friend who’s helping me pass astronomy.”

“You don’t even text me that much,” Jack said, eyebrows raised. “So, come on, spill the beans.”

Rose groaned and reached for her beer. “I might, might, have a crush on my mystery man.”

Jack cheered, drawing looks from everyone else at their table. “So make a move!”

“I don’t even know who he is, Jack! He probably doesn’t even live around here.”

“So?”

“So that makes making a move a bit difficult, yeah?”

“You two lovebirds already have a great connection. What’s a bit of distance and putting a face to a name?”

“A lot.”

“Fine, fine. Just think about it though.”

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

Text to Space Doctor [1:47 am]: u stil up?

Text to Starry Rose [1:49 am]: Yes. Didn’t realize it was so late, actually.

Text to Space Doctor [1:52 am]: jack got me drynkj

Text to Space Doctor [1:53 am]: drunk. ha!

Text to Starry Rose [1:54 am]: All his fault?

Text to Space Doctor [1:56 am]: no

Text to Space Doctor [1:57 am]: ur falt too

Text to Starry Rose [2:00 am]: Really? How so?

Text to Starry Rose [2:05 am]: Rose?

Text to Starry Rose [2:11 am]: Are you alright? Do you need someone to come get you or anything? I’m in London but I can call a cab anywhere.

Text to Starry Rose [2:20 am]: I’m going to hope you just fell asleep or your phone died but let me know that you’re alright when you see these messages.

Text to Space Doctor [7:46 am]: remind me never to drink w/ jack again.

Text to Space Doctor [7:47 am]: my head is killing me

Text to Space Doctor [7:54 am]: sorry for worrying u last night. fell asleep

Text to Space Doctor [8:02 am]: also sorry for drunk texting you

Text to Starry Rose [9:13 am]: Glad you’re alright. You can text me whenever, you know that :)

Text to Space Doctor [9:14 am]: :) :) :)

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

“I still can’t believe you haven’t finished reading Harry Potter,” John complained. They’d been talking for almost three months now and, as far as she could tell, he had called tonight specifically to complain about her lack of Harry Potter knowledge.

“I’ve been a bit busy.”

“The last one has been out for ten years, Rose.”

“I’ll get there!”

“You’ve at least seen the movies, right?”

“The first couple. I’m waiting to read the books,” she said, grinning. This was too easy.

He groaned dramatically. “I’m not sure I can be friends with you.”

Rose laughed. “You know you are far too easy to wind up, right?”

“What?”

“Doctor, I’ve read the whole series like three times and seen all the movies,” she admitted, still grinning as she moved into her kitchen to pour a glass of wine.

“I cannot believe you.”

“Still want to be friends?”

He sniffed, dramatic to the end. “I suppose, but you’re on thin ice.”

“Even if I tell you my theories on the Sorting Hat?”

“...I’m listening.”

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

Text to Space Doctor [3:34 pm]: i’m going to fail all my finals but especially astronomy

Text to Starry Rose [3:36 pm]: You’re going to do brilliantly. Want me to call tonight to help go over things?

Text to Space Doctor [3:39 pm]: please. i’ll be home around 7?

Text to Starry Rose [3:45 pm]: I’ll talk to you then!

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

Rose walked out of her astronomy final feeling cautiously optimistic about how she’d done. She quickly fished out her mobile and turned it back on to text John. She quickly shot off a message that she’d survived and then headed straight to Tesco’s to get a celebratory bottle of wine.

Jack wasn’t finished with his tests until tomorrow so they were going out then. Tonight was all hers and she had a date with Netflix and at least one bottle of wine.

She was settling down on her sofa when her mobile buzzed in her pocket. Rose quickly checked it and smiled when she saw it was a text from the Doctor.

Text to Starry Rose [6:52 pm]: Congratulations on making it through your class! I’m sure you aced the final!

Text to Space Doctor [6:54 pm]: SO glad to be done with that class

Text to Space Doctor [6:55 pm]: celebrating with alcohol and crap telly. any watching suggestions before i pick something?

Text to Starry Rose [6:59 pm]: Star Trek?

Text to Space Doctor [7:02 pm]: omg you are so predictable

She grinned and queued up the next episode of the comedy she’d started a week ago and settled in for a cozy night.

About three quarters of the way through her bottle of wine, Rose had the sudden realization that without astronomy class, she wouldn’t have a built-in excuse to call John anymore. She knew they were friends, but what if everything was built on that tutor relationship and things started crumbling.

She’d known for a while that she had a massive crush on her mysterious friend, despite having no clue what he looked like or any identifying details about him. She took a healthy sip of her wine and picked up her phone, quickly opening her conversation with John.

Maybe meeting in person was the next step. She’d wanted to for ages but something had held her back. Fear. The fear that he would be disappointed by who she was outside of their phone conversations or that maybe she would be disappointed in him, but she thought that scenario unlikely. The fear that actually meeting would somehow ruin the magic of their instant friendship.

That feeling was suppressed by red wine, showing up only as a tickle in the pit of her stomach as she started typing.

Text to Space Doctor [8:50 pm]: you know… we should meet up sometime. get chips or something

Text to Space Doctor [8:53 pm]: i’m in london too. don’t know if i ever told you that

Text to Space Doctor [8:56 pm]: but i’d really like to properly meet you.

Text to Space Doctor [9:00 pm]: only if you want tho

Rose stared down at her phone, biting her bottom lips as the television played on unnoticed. He usually answered faster than this. Had she made him uncomfortable? Oh god, what if she’d completely screwed things up?

She set her phone aside and tried to concentrate on her show and reclaim the celebratory mood she’d felt earlier but it was gone.

Soon the wine was as well.

John never texted back.

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

When Jack arrived at Rose’s flat the next afternoon, he expected to find his friend chipper and ready for a night out on the town now that they were done with the semester. Instead, she opened the door in sweats and an oversized t-shirt, expression drawn.

“Whoa there, Rosie. You feeling alright?” he asked, stepping into her flat and closing the door behind him.

“I’m fine,” she said, giving him a wan smile. “Just lost track of time. I’ll go get ready, you know where everything is.”

“Hey now,” he said, grabbing onto her arm so she didn’t get very far. “What’s wrong? Did you get a bad exam grade back or something? It’s not like you to be so down, especially when we’re free of classes for a bit!”

“I’m fine!”

“You’re not. Fight with your mystery boy?”

Rose looked away and Jack felt a protective anger rising in his chest.

“What did the jackass do?”

“Nothing, that’s the problem,” she said with a sigh, sagging back against the back of the sofa.

“Care to elaborate?”

“I’d texted him earlier last night to tell him I’d survived the astronomy final and everything seemed fine and then I had to go and open my stupid mouth after having a lot of wine.”

Jack raised an eyebrow, waiting for her to continue.

She sighed. “I asked him if he wanted to meet up sometime, like in person. Get chips or something.”

“And he didn’t answer you?”

“S’like he fell off the face of the planet. I haven’t heard from him all day.”

“Aw, Rose, I’m sorry. I know you really like him.” Jack gathered her into a hug and his heart cracked a bit when he heard her sniffle.

“I really really do. Why won’t he answer me? He could just say no and we could stay phone friends at least.”

“I don’t know, Rosie. Your man’s an idiot.”

She laughed, a small watery thing but a laugh nonetheless. “Yeah he is.”

“Wanna stay in and watch cheesy chick flicks and eat ice cream?”

“I don’t want to ruin your night, Jack. You go ahead and go out without me,” she insisted, pulling back from the hug.

“Nope. I’m spending the night with you. We can go out another time when you’ll actually have fun.”

“I might have already eaten all my ice cream.”

“I’ll go get us some more while you pick out movies. Deal?”

“Throw in some wine and you’ve got one.”

“Perfect.”

They shook on it like they always did and then Jack kissed her forehead and waltzed back out the door.

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

John sped back to town, anxious to get to his flat where he would have both a charged mobile and service so he could use it. He’d gone on a stargazing trip and forgotten that he wouldn’t have any reception or power and he hadn’t told Rose that he was going off the grid.

Damn but he missed her. He was really hoping that she still wanted to be friends now that she didn’t need his astronomy knowledge any more. He thought that she would but there was still this niggling worry that maybe he thought they were better friends than they were. He could be blinded by the ginormous crush he had on her but he was almost positive that they were legitimately friends.

The moment he stepped into his flat he dropped his bag on the floor with a thud and made a beeline for the phone charger by his bed. Powering up his mobile, he winced at the number of texts he’d missed. A couple were from Donna but he went straight to his messages with Rose.

He couldn’t contain his grin when he read the first few, the ones that said she wanted to meet him. John couldn’t believe he’d missed these! Then his heart fell into his stomach as he kept reading.

Text to Space Doctor [10:34 am]: if you don’t want to meet up u can just say so

Text to Space Doctor [10:40 am]: i’m not going to hold it against you or anythin

Text to Space Doctor [5:45 pm]: i hope you’re alright. not like you not to text back.

Text to Space Doctor [6:02 pm]: sorry if i made things awkward

Text to Space Doctor [11:22 am]: you know what, fuck this. i really want to meet you because i really like you and you’re one of my best friends now. you don’t have to up and ghost me just out of the blue like this

Text to Space Doctor [1:30 pm]: please at least let me know that you’re okay

John swore profusely as he checked the time and realized that her last text was from four hours ago. She’d been texting him all weekend, thinking he was just ignoring her because he was an idiot and forgot to tell her he was going out of range.

Hands shaking, he hit the dial button and raised the phone to his ear, praying she’d actually pick up.

“Nice of you to finally answer me,” she said acidly when she picked up on what he thought was the last ring before it went to voicemail. “I do like to know that my friend isn’t dead in a ditch somewhere.”

“Rose, I’m so sorry,” he started.

“For worrying me or for being a prick or for something else?”

“Everything? I was on a stargazing trip and I forgot that I wouldn’t have service out there. And then my phone died and I’d forgotten to pack my charger and I just got back to my flat and saw your messages. I called right away. I’m so sorry.” The words spilled out of him, like if he got them out fast enough, Rose would believe him faster and they could move past this and get to the meeting up part that he really hoped she still wanted to do.

There was silence for a moment and then he heard Rose start laughing.

“Rose?”

“Oh my god, I was worried that I’d scared you off and then that something had happened and you were just being your normal idiot self,” she said through her laughs.

“Um, yeah pretty much. And for the record, you proposed to me during our first conversation, I don’t think you’re scaring me off now,” he said, rubbing at the back of his neck with his free hand.

“Well, that’s good to hear.”

“So, chips? I’ll buy. I really want to meet you too.” He paused, heart racing as he worked on getting the words out. “I kinda really like you too,” he said.

“It’s a date,” Rose said. He could hear the smile in her voice and he grinned too.

“Brilliant!”

“Are you free right now? I could murder a basket of chips right about now.”

“I am! Just have to wait for my phone to finish charging.”

“Perfect. I’ll text you the address of my favorite chippy?”

“Sounds good.”

“Alright, I’ll see you later then!”

John made a little happy noise and Rose laughed.

“I like the sound of that too,” she admitted.

“I’ll see you in a bit.”

“Bye, Doctor.”

“Bye Rose.”

They rang off and the Doctor just grinned down at his phone. He had a date with Rose! A real proper date!

His mobile buzzed and he quickly opened the message from Rose.

Text to Space Doctor [5:47 pm]: meet in an hour? this is the address.

Text to Space Doctor [5:47 pm]: <image attached>

Text to Space Doctor [5:48 pm]: and that’s me so you know who you’re looking for ;)

Text to Space Doctor [5:49 pm]: see you soon! xx

Text to Starry Rose [5:49 pm]: You are gorgeous.

Text to Starry Rose [5:50 pm]: <image attached>

Text to Starry Rose [5:50 pm]: One hour. See you soon :) xx

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

Within five minutes of meeting, neither of them could remember why they were so nervous about doing this. They talked as easily as they had over the phone and text for months but now, they could see the smiles they were drawing from the other person and brush fingers as they stole chips from each other.

Rose teased John endlessly about forgetting his wallet when he had promised to buy but said that they were definitely on him next time. His answering grin was so wide and bright that Rose thought she might pay for the chips all the time just to see it.

They reluctantly parted ways after a couple hours, heading in opposite directions outside of the shop. Rose had barely made it around the first corner when her phone vibrated in her hand.

Text to Starry Rose [9:15 pm]: Have plans for tomorrow?

Text to Space Doctor [9:16 pm]: miss me already? ;)

Text to Starry Rose [9:16 pm]: Yes.

Text to Space Doctor [9:16 pm]: big ol’ softie <3 i miss you too

Text to Space Doctor [9:17 pm]: and no i don’t have anything planned

Text to Starry Rose [9:18 pm]: Good. Want to hang out with me?

Text to Space Doctor [9:18 pm]: absolutely. give me the details when you know them?

Text to Starry Rose [9:20 pm]: Will do :)

Text to Space Doctor [11:15 pm]: so i figure i might as well put this out there before i see you tomorrow. i meant it when i said i really like you and you should know that it’s as more than just a friend. i’m hopin that you feel the same but if not than we can stay just friends

Text to Space Doctor [11:18 pm]: really what i’m trying to say is that if you’re not completely opposed to the idea i’m probably going to kiss you tomorrow

Text to Starry Rose [11:19 pm]: Honestly, I almost kissed you today when we hugged goodbye so I’m definitely not opposed and I feel the same way :)

Text to Space Doctor [11:20 pm]: !!!!

Text to Starry Rose [11:20 pm]: Haha, my feelings exactly!

Text to Space Doctor [11:22 pm]: so… do you want to just come over to mine tomorrow and watch netflix and maybe make out on the couch?

Text to Space Doctor [11:23 pm]: i might even let you convince me to watch star trek finally

Text to Starry Rose [11:23 pm]: Yes.

Text to Starry Rose [11:23 pm]: Also yes to the Star Trek. You’re going to love it!

Text to Space Doctor [11:24 pm]: your nerdery is catching, apparently

Text to Space Doctor [11:24 pm]: i only didn’t watch it before because i thought it would be more fun to watch it with you

Text to Starry Rose [11:25 pm]: Now who’s the big ol’ softie? :)) <3

Text to Space Doctor [11:25 pm]: the promise of make outs helps too

Text to Space Doctor [11:26 pm]: still you <3

Text to Starry Rose [11: 28 pm]: I’m going to get some sleep. I’ll see you tomorrow! xx

Text to Space Doctor [11:29 pm]: goodnight doctor <3 see you tomorrow xx

[danieltrent]

5,8,16,22,26,29,31,32,36,38,39,46 (sorry there are so many

thanks sweet anon! and don’t apologise, im bored so this is a good distraction, and i love answering these questions! except not when i have to answer them again because i accidentally refreshed the first time.

5. Last text message that made you smile?well, i got a message from @sense-there-is-none saying “why doesn’t ex dress as well as you do” which, while i dont agree i dress well, it was nice to hear. besides, sweet anon, i smile at pretty much every delightful ask you send.

8. Would you be my friend?sweet anon, you are my friend. and if anyone else is reading this, i would be your friend - legit, if you just send me a “hi” id be like “oh look i got a message from a friend!”

16. Can you draw?interesting question, and it depends on what you define as drawing. im great at copying other drawings and photos (or at least i used to be), but im terrible at making things up or remembering off the top of my head.

22. Least favorite book you’ve read?that’s hard to answer, mainly because i rarely read books, and even when i do if it was bad id put it down pretty quick. although, ill have to call out Lord of the Rings. i know its actually great, but i just couldnt read it. CS Lewis was right when he said Tolkien described trees too much.

26. Favourite childhood TV show?i have a terrible memory, but from what i do remember, i really liked CatDog for its silly fun, SpongeBob SquarePants for the same reason (but this was 10 to 15 years ago, i dont know what it’s like now), and YuGiOh, but I never cared about the plot or anything, i think i just really liked the monsters and because i played the game myself.

29. Something you regret not doing?i regret not giving my ex more space when she asked for it. but i know thats easier said than done, and i can say anything in hindsight. at the time, giving her space wasn’t an easy thing to do, especially because i was going through a pretty rough episode of depression at the time. oh depression, how you love to get in the way of things.

31. Kisses or hugs?hugs, because i am very much touch-starved at the moment. (but still, when my sister went to hug me the other day i tried to push her away because i still feel like i shouldnt be that close to anyone, especially family. long story)

32. Cuddles or sex?cuddles, for the same reason. i really like the idea of holding someone while we fall asleep together.

36. Favourite super-villain?i really like Heath Ledger’s Joker in The Dark Knight, but i know everyone does.

seeing as im not really into superhero stuff, and even less so their villains, ill extend this question to non-super villains. in that case, I really like Frank Fontaine in BioShock, purely because of his role in the absolutely mindblowing plot twist. and (slight spoiler, if you want to go into the game completely unspoiled), it definitely wasnt the battle with him that made him a good villain - in fact, the battle was pretty lame - but it was just the amazing plot twist.

38. Dream job?it might just be because ive been painting models recently, but id like to design, print and paint 3D models and then sell them. i really enjoy designing 3D models using computer software, and obviously enjoy painting them, so its a good combination.

39. Ideal partner?honestly, it’s what you make of it. i could say my ex was the perfect partner, but that’s because we have a good amount of communication and honesty between us, which are the main things you need for any relationship. as long as you have that (and maybe a little more), you’re set. i have types - both physical and mental - but all my previous partners have deviated from that in one way or another.

46. Opinion on aliens?hell yeah. see also: Fermi paradox, but if i had an opinion either way it wouldnt be “aliens dont exist because thatd be weird” or “aliens exist because look at the pyramids”. but yeah, i reckon there’s aliens, but quite possibly not in the way that we expect them to be; we might need to redefine what we consider ‘life’ to realise that aliens exist.

[gay-poetry-and-photography]

Hi

i need to vent or rant idk but nobody in my real life needs to hear it because ill feel like a dipshit so its going here where like maybe one person will see it tops but it doesnt matter because its out in the open.

okay so first of all i couldnt sleep like at all last night because my cramps kept waking me up, i took 3 200mg ibuprofen pills but it didnt help so i suffered. then when i woke up the pain was amplified and i started sobbing because i didnt wanna deal with them, especially at school but i had to go because i had drivers training and i cant miss it :,)

so i dealt with cramps all day, i popped three more ibuprofens before i left for school. then when those didnt help i took midol in first hour. within one hour i bled through my underwear even with a super tampon in so i wanted to fucking die already. then i took more midol at lunch and then again in fifth hour.

then halfway through 6th hour i had a weird energy crash and felt how i feel before passing out, my lips and teeth tingled, my whole body shook, i got really warm, and my arms and mouth felt heavy. i couldnt speak without taking forever and stuttering while talking and my arms were spasming for like an hour and a half. then it ended and its all good.

so after drivers training im chilling with my friend outside of the school talking about random stuff and my other friend she likes comes into conversation. we talked about him for a quick second and then i messaged him saying i didnt know he had a thing for her and he said he didnt he likes someone else. he also said im his best friend and i know everything but who he likes and so i was like who is it and i bugged him. then he made me guess and i started listing off girls and i jokingly listed my girlfriends name and i swear to god he likes my girlfriend. so now im doubting if im good for her because she could be with him because hes better than me and like she deserves better than me and better than him but hes better than me so i guess thatd be a step up.

in summary i bled a ridiculous amount, was in immense pain all day, had a weird spell thing, and now im contemplating my self worth and why i exist lmao. yikes.

[isaacathom]

i mean my issue is SHOULD the docs daughter get a unique design? like.... shes not a character. she exists, in the world, you can fight her in the big city and post game you can go to the little town where she and rhia live with Doc and you can interact with her about the stuff that happened (as she has returned home following the Chaos thing) but like.... shes not a haracter??? unless the ~post game~ involves her in some way, which it could, id be down for her being relevant in the post game, though idk how. esp considering i dunno what the post game would be. like... theres a couple of ideas. Hunting CEO, hunting Rhia, and finding the e4 member that fucked off. because like, the WHOLE reason you can have Rhia/Elliot as an e4 member is because someone left and on short notice they called elliot to fill in (and he could pass that duty to rhia in reconcile ending)

so like. what. docs daughter is only relevant to a Rhia hunt, which also wouldnt work in a reconcile end because Rhia’s in the e4 and shes fine. in an end where she and elliot dont make up, she COULD vanish, but i feel like itd be way more fun to have her whereabout be unknown in that case. besides, where’d she go? probably Unova to stay with the man whose legally her father but bear in mind theres fake paperwork involved. or shes out hunting CEO, which she can easily do anyway (though branching cutscenes in a Hunt CEO route based on whether shes there or not might be fun)

one idea is, Hunt CEO, and the docs daughter is in charge. why? her dear dads request. because now she knows he was in team whatsit (because of his ENTIRE FAMILY shes the only one who didnt know, poor thing) and she wants to get rid of all thats left of it so her dad can live a normal life, or something. she calls you to her home town, and she talks you through it, you go on a couple of lil trips around the region to fight team whatsit members. and you might encounter Rhia doing the same thing. like on one occasion, she saves your hide. her outfits change based on the end (which would be demonstrated in the Reconcile/Split cutscene with Elliot) so you’d have a visual signifier to tell them apart. but her purpose is different, too. sorta. in reconcile, her hunting down Team Whatsit is part of The Deal she’s made, like she’s doing this for the police. in split, shes doing it for herself. fun lil split. shed probably show up when you finally confront CEO at the end of the post game. the docs daughter would be there too. the doc is nowhere to be seen.

maybe CEO even kidnaps the docs daughter. that’d be fun. itd convince the Doc to join her in reforming team whatsit after its shattering at your hands, and it could also convince Rhia to come back. of course, it does the opposite. DOC is MIA for the postgame (in that hes in Extensive Talks with the Police) and Rhia is fucking livid at the daughters kidnapping, no matter what. she’d contact you for the final bit. you find her where you’d normally find the daughter. no matter what ‘end’ you got, shes dressed for a Fucking Fight. like, the outfits would be different to reflect the reconcile/split, but shes out for blood.

oh dude. i also wanna play up the ‘pokemon can hurt ya’ thing here. like, you and rhia approach CEO. you can see the daughter in a cell nearby. Rhia tells you to free her while she deals with CEO. heres the thing - ceo KNOWS rhia is probably better than her in a fight. she also knows you’re better than her in a fight, youve beaten her before. so what she does is she tries to take you BOTH out before you can summon pokemon. uses like, a carnivine to whack yall around. sends Rhia flying off screen to the daughters absolute wails. wraps you up and holds you high. shes not going to let you two ruin her plans. if you wont join her, you will be Removed. then. idk. legendary saves your ass. your bff appears. thatd be fun. idk i just like the idea of rhia, regardless of route, just getting fucking wasted for Drama. not something where Lance goes ‘move’ and is implied to have hyper beamed a guy whose totally fine, like you see a woman standing tall and proud and then shes vanished for like..... 5 minutes and all you can tell of her condition is the only other person in the room wailing while youre focused on the Big Bad.

then you beat Ceo with the power of your Divine Purity Of Heart and you knock her out, so that you can call the police. but they arrive very shortly after, before you can. Rhia, over in a corner, near curled into a ball, sent out a message to them while you fought CEO before she passed out. the Doc is there. you free the daughter and she and him run to Rhia’s side while the police take you aside and thank you while carrying CEO away.

no matter what end she got, you will go home and be called by the docs daughter back to her place. when you arrive, Rhia is there, with a few bandages but otherwise alright, and wearing her regular (per end) outfit. and then some gushy shit.

though i also like the idea of you directly saving her life too.  not just in the ‘oh i stopped CEO and she wouldve killed you if i hadnt’ im talking like ‘took a bullet for you babe’. though maybe Elliot should fill that role. ooh, that makes sense. means regardless of the ending they got (Reconcile/split) he comes to save her. like, rhia gets knocked away and you get a nice visceral thud off screen that sounds pretty brutal. daughter screams. youre frozen in place (or held in place, haha, there you go), and CEO taunts you and the aughter over it. the camera pans over to Rhia struggling to get up, and you see CEO prepare to deal Rhia a (probably) fatal blow. and then, BAM. its elliot. hes here. he’s in the way. he’s on the ground. Rhia screams. daughter screams. CEO screams. you scream too, probably, but less because of elliot and more because the carnivine was so surprised it just dropped you. not far, mind you, like half a metre, but you fall on your ass in surprise. Rhia freaks out immediately, like shes losing her shit, because even if this is split ending where she hates elliot, elliot just ‘took a bullet’ for her, holy shit, holy shit, oh my god, oh fuck, oh fuck, is he ok, oh my fucking god.

and then she makes eye contact with you. you nod. you charge CEO while shes distracted. a pokemon battle ensues. you cant see whats happening while youre battling, of course, because thatd be Ridiculously Unfeasible (beyond how unfeasible this shit is already). you fight CEO. she totters backward and recalls her carnivine (her last pokemon, like itd be programmed in that the pokemon that wrapped you up is the last pokemon she sends out). and shes furious. and she actually reaches for one of the doc’s daughters pokemon, which she’d comandeered when she kidnapped her. and she summons it. its the pokemon that Rhia gave to the daughter. it takes one look around. it fucks up the CEO’s day. just. whap. there she goes. seeya darl. immediate karma. it roars loud, nigh shakes the building.

you run forward and grab the cell key from CEO. you free the daughter. she sprints to Rhia and Elliots side, and you join them.

is elliot ok? probably not. not like, dead, but like, Fucked Up. in fact, itd be cool if this affected split route, because it means he cant perform e4 duties, and rhia’d take charge. meaning theres a change in the e4 in the post game if you do it. fuck. fuck imagine that. only in split ending though. him being out of action in reconcile doesnt affect the e4 because Rhia already took that role on his behalf. but like. hes fucked up. the daugher is a doctor, shes working on him, you grabbed her pokeballs while you grabbed the key and she summons like a chansey and shit.  everyones frantic. theres closure to the rhia/elliot thing, esp for split route, because now rhia has to accept that elliot has changed. on some level. hence she then takes his e4 spot like she does in reconcile. that’d be sweet. dunno how itd really impact a reconcile route though. idk thats dumb.

then the police come and they take elliot and CEO away. they came with some docs because they expected this wouldnt be pretty. maybe DOC is there. he and his daughter/s can have a brief reunion. you all leave, Rhia leaning on doc and daughter.

then the daughter calls you to somewhere else. like, the city pokemon center. you meet her there, and she takes you to the hospital. you get to go further in. elliots there. hes smiling. depending on rhia end, shes either at his side (reconcile) or standing outside the door (split)

theres not much to it after that but i do like the idea of the rhia/elliot thing progressing. involve the daughter as a supporting character. though again, it is weird to continue rhia/elliot past a reconcile route. split route is fun, because it forces rhia to acknowledge she was wrong about him on some level. but with reconcile, she already DID that, when elliot refused to run away in the skyscraper. so theres no point in having the revelation again. hmmmm. maybe it completes the thing for her. because even in reconcile, shes hesitant about elliot, shes not sure if him being ‘good’ was temporary or not. and him taking the shot for her just proves it to her that yea, elliot is a good guy, he did bad shit but hes a good guy, he’s changed, hes a better person. like, no matter what happened in the main story or back story, elliot IS a better person by the end of the game as a whole. at least by Rhia’s metric, though i imagine the player would agree that him fleeing from a person in need to saving that same persons life is a positive change, regardless of the fact that him saving rhia gets his ass so thoroughly whooped hes out of commission for the rest of the game (which is admittedly just post game sandbox but STILL you know)

idk. that stuffs complicated

so i should probably give the daughter a name and a unique design, huh. based on the other doctors (which is a trainer class, no doubt), but with a unique hairstyle and way of presenting herself. maybe she even has some similarities to Rhia. yknow. cause theyre a cute couple no matter what end you get.