#number 2 and 5 are the biggest bitches of them all

[niicevibe]

*sigh* every time I go to work on a wip, I go through several very different stages of grief:

I'm almost completely unimpressed with the outcome and must scrap it; I must start from scratch or damn the entire piece.

I think up a new idea and obsessively work on it until I've lost all motivation.

The wip stays in limbo until something triggers my stupid brain to rationalize that it actually looks good? Huh???

My ADHD kicks in to help (read: whatever the opposite of "help" is) fuel my most recent hyperfixation and distract me from what needs to be done.

Actual irl things need to be done and begrudgingly, I go and do them.

[twstfanblog]

*~Period Drama~*

A/N: This was a funny idea I had and Now I'm gonna do another series with my Yuu OC. Note that I write most of the cast in a platonic sense with my OC because that's how their story formed. I'm fully open to doing requests with characters in a romantic sense. Word Count: 4.7K Warnings: Period mentions, allusions to sexual assault (They are assumed, nothing actually happens), She/They OC Pronouns Pairings: Azul/Reader (Poly), Jamil/Reader (Poly) Enjoy! Start (Here), Part 2 (Octavinelle), Part 3 (Heartslabyul), Part 4 (Savanaclaw), Part 4.5 (Diasomnia pt.1), Part 5 (Diasomnia pt2)

Yuu was forgetting something, she knew she was. But sitting in her pjs on a Saturday morning, an over-filled bowl of sugary cereal in hand, she couldn't be bothered to really care.

It was shaping up to be a good day too. None of the staff needed her help with anything, her friends all had their club meetings, and the kitchen was stocked with easy-to-grab snacks for Grim. the cat monster himself had even started his homework on Friday night with minimal fighting. Literally, nothing could be wrong, but she still felt uneasy. They woke up feeling weary and oddly bloated.

With an inquisitive expression, she taps her spoon against her bowl. They really hoped they weren't going to spend all day in a strange sense of deja vu…

Then she sneezed and everything made sense. Yuu blinks, moving back to pull the seam of their pj pants, looking down as they groan, "Ah, shit…"

Azul loved Saturdays, they were his biggest money-maker days. Students came to the Mostro Lounge either to get a head start on homework, grab a drink after practice or clubs, or merely have a freshly cooked meal. It also was the day he had most of his workforce available so he could spare the time to walk around campus or catch up on his own paperwork.

But, what he's trying to do was gather his courage and think up a plausible enough reason for him to go visit his date-mate. Not that he usually needed one, they were very vocal about how he was always a welcomed presence in their company.

But, Yuu had been…easily irked? Prickly? Upset. Yuu had been upset for most of the week but anyone who questioned their mood was quickly shot down. The prefect would then tensely state they weren’t mad and then questioned why people thought they were mad. Sure they had a very intense resting bitch face but who didn't at Night Raven? (He's fairly certain you needed to either be handsome or have the most terrifying resting bitch face to be admitted to this school).

So he wasn't too pressed about his date-mate's mood until Floyd said something. He had come into the back office pouting of all things, saying 'Shrimpy smelled off'. They had also punched him when the eel merman attempted to pick them up, which wasn't normal.

Jade handled his twin, trying to cull Floyd’s decreasing mood, while Azul opened a few text chats to ask if anyone had caused Yuu reason to want to kill someone. The genuine confusion and concern that answered back only made him more uneasy.

Now, on a sunny Saturday, Azul made the long journey toward Ramshackle. With an obscure board game tucked under his arm and a bag of exclusive gummy candy in hand, he was on a mission to improve his dear pearl’s mood.

Or he was until he was suddenly being dragged down the dirt road in a different direction. He yelped and shouted, trying to angle himself to see what was pulling him through the mud and sticks. The answer was Sam’s shadows, the black willowy wisps quickly yanking him into the shop and setting him on his feet. Azul looks down at his outfit, scowling at seeing the dirt and grass stains. Sevens, did he rip his slacks?

“Lil fish.”

Azul jolts, eyes wide and semi-fearful at Sam’s echoing tone. The man stood behind the counter, a number of medical supplies laying across the surface as his nails gripped at the wood. Sam’s eyes were wide, pupils pinprick as his amethyst orbs almost glowed under all the shadows. Speaking of shadows…Azul looks around the shop, feeling actual fear stir in him. The shadows were everywhere, zipping through the aisles, slithering in and out of the back room, and some were even racing out of the shop, “Uh…Yes, Sam? H-how can I be of assistance?” He didn’t stutter, he refuses to admit he stuttered.

“Do you know what a pad is?”

…

“Like…Like a notepad or-”

“NO!” Sam slams his fist onto the counter, the lights of the near-endless shop flickering wildly at the force of it. He rests his face in his hands, paying no mind to his makeup and hat that fell to the counter. Looking up, his intense stare was replaced with one of desperation, “You’re killing me here, kid. Look, if you know what a damn pad is, just tell me where to get one! I know you and the lil pup talk!”

“I swear, I have no clue what you’re talking about, sir.” Sevens, had Azul ever felt scared of Sam? He didn’t like this, why was his fellow businessman so frazzled? What kind of pad was he talking about? Why couldn’t he find it and assumed Azul would know where and what the damn thing was?

Sam groans, hands running furiously through purple-tinted lock braids. With a snap of his fingers, the wisps all stop. Either quickly entering the shop or bleeding into the shadows to hide once more, “Look just…Go see the prefect. They called me asking for sanitation pads? That’s the business name they told me anyway…That and just…a lot of pain potions.”

Azul clicked out of his confusion, growing nervous at the potions request, “I…wait are they hurt? Shouldn’t they be in the infirmary?”

“I suggested that, but they insisted they didn’t need to go, just the potions. I’m sending them over soon, Crewel is due to deliver my order in an hour or two. I’ll send him over after ya once he gets here.” Sam grumbles under his breath as Azul rushes out of the store. ‘Primadonna dog hates when I call him while he’s brewing…’

Azul pulls his phone from his pocket, sending a text to both Jade and Floyd. Yuu was in pain, they had requested something called a ‘sanitation pad’? Whatever those were. By the name he could only guess they were used for cleaning of some kind. He sent the twins a message to meet him at Ramshackle ASAP, potentially 119 status. Yuu had always joked about the Octavinelle trio being the first ones they’d call if they needed to hide a body. But, it seemed when it came time for them to actually make the call, the poor thing must have been overwhelmed. He could only think they had done it in self-defense, but the cause didn’t matter. There wasn’t going to be a body in a few hours.

Halfway through the woods to Ramshackle, he hears other footsteps hurrying to catch him. Looking over his shoulder, he raises an eyebrow at the extra amount of people, “Why are they here?”

Ace, Deuce, and Jamil all kept a quick jog behind Floyd and Jade’s long-legged walk. Floyd rolled his eyes, pointing behind him with his thumb, “I was at practice. Crabby and Sea Snake saw the text and wanna help lil Shrimpy too…”

Deuce raises a hand, "I saw them leaving the gym on my way to track practice. Yuu's my classmate and friend, it's only right I help them."

Jamil hisses under his breath, side-eyeing Azul as he sped up to walk beside him, “Plus, they’re my date-mate too, asshole…”

Rolling his eyes, Azul sighed, waving Jamil’s attitude off, “Yes, yes. We can meet with Draconia later about our timeshare lover's crimes. But for now, we need to go and assist them with the dead body I’m sure is on their property.”

Ace sighs, relaxing more as he leans back, arms folding behind his head, “Yuu finally did it, huh?”

“I mean…They can only threaten to murder someone so many times before they’d snap…” Deuce pipes up, rubbing the back of his head, almost dreading getting blood on his uniform again.

Floyd giggled, “I can’t wait to see who Shrimpy squeezed~. I bet they made it real messy!”

“Hmm…I wouldn’t put it past Yuu to kill someone via strangulation. But their MO seems to lean more toward bludgeoning.” Jade smiles to the group, eyes closing in barely hidden glee, “If anything clean up will at least be interesting if we’re just dealing with some blood splatter and a puddle!”

 Ace and Deuce wince, watching Floyd, Azul, and Jamil simply nod at Jade’s examination.

The mood was instantly broken once they came into view of Ramshakle. Floyd and Jade tensed, their smiles dropping off their faces before racing toward the dorm as two teal-colored blurs. Azul shouted, only to choke on his tongue at the smell. Blood. His nose wasn’t anywhere as sensitive as Floyd's or Jade’s but even at this distance, he could smell the sharp iron smell. He jogged to catch up with his dormmates, his expression of panic causing the other three to speed up as well.

All he could smell was Yuu’s blood. Sharp and salty, but spiced and sweet because of their diet. A hint of some type of alien fragrance that no one could place and Yuu couldn’t name mixing it all together perfectly. And that was all he was smelling, not even a hint of another person’s blood.

When the rest of the group had made it to the front porch, Floyd was pounding on the door, eyebrows creased while Jade searched the bushes for the hidden key, “Shrimpy! Open up! Shrimpy!”

Jade’s fingers had just grazed the false rock when the door’s locks clicked open. Floyd swung the door so hard it nearly sent Grim into the hallway wall. The feline monster kept to the ground, eyes wide and teary with fear, “Yuu’s bleeding all over everything and they won’t tell me why!”

Deuce was the only one who had the mindset to scoop Grim into his arms, the rest of them instantly rushing up the stairs toward Yuu’s bedroom. The sound of their footsteps pounding on the floor echoing in the house, each of them calling out in panicked voices. Azul could only grow increasingly worried, the scent of blood growing stronger and stronger.

Jade slams the door open, Ace instantly diving into the bed and startling Yuu awake.

“The-The fuck- hello?”

Ace cupped their face, using what medical lessons Riddle had drilled into his head to see if they had a visible injury, “Yuu! Can you hear me? We were calling you all the way downstairs- Ay!” He tumbles off the bed when Yuu shoves him aside, dark eyes glaring down at the redhead.

“Yeah, I was sleeping. Why are all of you in my house?”

“We smelled blood shrimpy!” Floyd kneeled onto the bed, sniffing around trying to find the main source of blood. Ignoring or nipping at Yuu’s hands trying to shove his face away from her body.

Azul stepped forward, eyes roaming in barely concealed haste, “Sam sent me over. He was worried by a request you had called him about? It’s sent him positively spiraling.”

Yuu raises an eyebrow, having given up on getting Floyd off their bed and wrapping an arm around him instead, “Yeah I was about to ask. Octobaby, what truck did you get dragged behind and did you at least get the license plate?”

Whatever positive flow of atmosphere that was building ended, Floyd grasping the duvet covering them and pulling, “Shrimpy, where are you bleeding-”

A single tug was all it took for Yuu’s bottom half to be flashed. They all look in stunned silence. Fresh red blood on a series of towels under them, a smear on the inside of their bare legs. Yuu shouts but none of them respond, minds spiraling at what could have possibly happened.

“Floyd! By the Seven, I’m not wearing any pants!” Yuu snatches the blanket back, draping it over their legs with a huff. They turn to Floyd only to have their face gripped harshly. Floyd stared at them with a dead expression, his single golden eye almost glowing with the force of his anger, “Floyd?”

“Who?”

“Wha-”

“Who?”

“Floyd.” Jade’s hands come into view, pulling Floyd’s grip off of their face and his brother off the bed. Jade was no better, a pleasant smile on his face but eyes wide and void of any emotion, “It’ll do no good to pressure them into telling us. Let us let our two professionals deal with this. The two of us can brainstorm methods of...disposing of the unsavory culprit once we have a name or description.”

Yuu watched them slowly leave the room. Floyd just barely letting Jade pull him along as his expression started to finally morph into a look of anger. His fists clenched as he gritted his teeth, body so tense his movements were more shaky than his normal loose glide.

Looking beside them, Yuu catches eyes with Ace and Deuce. Ace quickly turned away, a hand covering his mouth as a single tear slid down his cheek and his shoulders shook. Deuce was no better, gripping Grim in his arms as he hiccuped softly with just barely contained sobs. He looked like he was fighting back the urge to go into 'delinquent mode'.

Jamil finally moves, a hand on each of Ace's and Deuce's shoulders, guiding them to the door. Softly pushing them out too once Jade had managed to pull Floyd out of the room, “Let us talk to them…We’ll…we’re gonna figure this out…”

Yuu watches stunned as Azul walks toward them as though he was approaching a wounded animal; softly, with just a hint of fear and pity, “Azul…What’s-?”

“It’s ok.” Jamil closed the door, still facing it so Yuu wasn’t sure if he was saying it to them or mumbling to himself, “It's…It’s ok, you’re gonna be fine…”

Azul had finally reached them and they could clearly see the unshed tears in his eyes, “It’s not your fault. This is not your fault, do you hear me?” He ran his fingers through their hair, his other hand gently cupping against her cheek as his thumb shakingly caressed their skin. He opens his mouth, closing his eyes while he sighs a shuddering sob. Gathering his wits again he opens his eyes, a fiery determination glowing in them, “We’re here for you, my pearl.”

“Wha…?” Yuu could only wrap their arms around Azul, the merman diving to embrace her in what had to be the most protective hold he could do with just his two arms. It felt safe and sturdy, like a cool blanket was wrapped around their body. While it was welcomed, Yuu only grew more confused feeling a wet spot start to form on their shoulder where Azul’s face had snuggled into, “I’m…very confused…”

“Yuu.”

If Azul wasn’t holding them, they would have jumped off the bed. Jamil stood right next to them with a blank expression. His face pulled into a mask of neutrality, but his eyes were steely, an ice-cold fire in them waiting to find a victim.

“Who. You can tell me, you can trust me. We’ll handle everything, you won't even have to look at the bastard unless you want to beat him to death yourself.” He kneels on the bed, his hand moving to touch her covered thigh before retreating, a pinched expression breaking his mask before it was back in place, “You have to tell us who did this to you, hayati.”

Did what to them?

Yuu stared at Jamil, blinking when he finally had to look away to bite his lip. He looked to be holding back tears, fully turning around to put his face in his hands to mutter under his breath. ‘How could he let this happen? Why couldn’t he have just one thing with nothing to ruin it?’ a teary sob of ‘Do they not trust him?’

“My pearl?” Azul pulls his face away from their shoulder, sniffling before he removes his glasses briefly to wipe his tears, “Do you…Would you like me to draw you a bath? This can’t be comfortable-”

“Azul!” Jamil whipped around, glaring at the merman, sparing them a worried glance before turning back to Azul and whispering heatedly, “They can’t take a bath until they get checked, you moron!”

“What’s there to check Jamil!? We can all clearly see what happened! Why put them through the extra…extra poking and defilement when we know what happened!?”

“Because we need evidence!”

“What we need is a name! Or a description! I’m not even going to entertain the idea of bringing this to a court. We have plenty of manpower on campus to bury whoever did this 12 times over.”

“Excuse me, what the fuck are you guys talking about?” Yuu spoke up, eyes glancing between the two of them, “Because if you mean the bleeding, that’s pretty standard at this point.” Maybe they just…forgot they had a vagina? Boys normally didn’t react well to period talk in the first place, but this was an all-boy school and Yuu was more non-gendered than female-gendered. Maybe they just honestly forgot.

But, what they said had only made things worse, both Azul and Jamil looking at them in absolute horror. Standard. This was normal. This had happened multiple times already.

Azul starts to openly sob, wrapping himself around them in a way to keep everything else away, nuzzling his head into her neck and whimpering out apologies. Jamil covered his mouth, a look that Yuu could only call devastation on his face before he stood from the bed to pace the room. Mutters grew in volume and speed before Yuu finally realized what they thought had happened.

“Oh. OH!” They quickly pull Azul from their neck, hands pressed to both his cheeks to keep him looking into their eyes, “Sevens! Guys no! That isn’t what this is, I promise! No one hurt me like that!”

“You expect us to believe that!?” Jamil turns on them, eyes wild and red with held-back tears. He gestures to the bed, alluding to the mess of blood under the covers, “What else could this possibly be!? Why are you trying to defend them!?”

“Jamil, I’m on my period!” Yuu looked back at Azul once her words seemed to hit Jamil, “It’s just my period. No one hurt me. I’m…well, not fine. Periods are a bitch. But not that…I swear it wasn’t that.”

No one made a sound past Azul’s labored breathing, the merman’s expression slowly morphing from one of despair into confusion. Once his breathing was finally under control, he pulled Yuu’s hands from his face, a single brow raised, “Your…your period?”

“Yeah…It’s just my period.”

Jamil pulls a face, eyes looking down as his brain worked to understand what Yuu was saying, “...Like the punctuation?”

Yuu frowned, turning to Jamil, “Don’t you act fucking dumb with me.” They press a kiss to Azul’s forehead, letting him slump against their chest, not seeing the gears turning in his head, “You and your sister are basically the same petty soul shared between two bodies. You know what a period is Jamil.”

The two mages catch eyes across the room, both…so painfully confused. Azul takes his time to finally untangle from Yuu, giving a small smile and patting hesitantly at the blanket, “O-okay…A period…right?”

At Yuu’s annoyed nod, Jamil sniffs, checking that he hadn’t cried before looking over to the door, “And…Najma will know. You’re sure she will?”

“I mean basically every girl gets a period so I would think so Jamil…”

The two boys share another look, communicating in a way Yuu hadn’t learned to do with them yet before they turn back to them with those soft, weak smiles. Azul caresses their face again, saying they should go back to sleep and that someone will bring up something to eat later on. It was slow, they clearly didn’t want to leave, but they both closed the door behind them. They share another look in the hallway, nodding before moving to regroup with the others.

The contained chaos they walk in on was almost comical if the reason wasn’t so mortifying. Jade had a hand gripped on each of Floyd’s shoulders while they took up the loveseat, whispering to the taller eel as he held him back. The whispers growing in intensity as his eyes widened in manic glee every time Floyd growled and moved to pull out of his brother’s hold. Ace was leaning against the wall, anger clear on his face as his nails bit into his forearms. He was the only one who looked up when they walked into the room. Deuce sat on the couch, curled around who they could only think was Grim, his shoulders shaking with barely contained cries.

Ace speaks up first, calling everyone else’s attention to their entry, “Well? Who’s the bastard we’re hunting down?”

Jamil and Azul pause, Jamil looking to the side and sighing, “They say nothing happened-”

“They’re lying!” Grim cries from Deuce’s arms. 

The spade Heartslabyul soldier sniffles, raising his head to look from over the couch, “Grim said they’ve been bleeding since this morning. From before he woke up…”

Jamil pulled out his phone, already dialing his sister, “They said Najma would know what’s going on…They were…so sure nothing…happened…”

Ace opened his mouth to yell only to be cut off at the sound of Najma picking up the line on speakerphone.

“Jamil? What’s wrong, you never call me?”

“...” Jamil gulped, gripping his phone before speaking, “Najma, I need you to be completely honest with me. Swear on your life levels of seriousness. Do you know what a period is?”

“...Like the punctuation?”

Azul bit his lip, a hand moving to cover his mouth and start to pace around the room. He walks closer to Jade and Floyd to explain, the two eels listening to his quick words in clear confusion.

“I…Najma, something happened. Is it…normal to…” He let out another sigh, almost wishing it would take his soul with it, “Is it normal to bleed…out of your vagina?”

The beat of silence almost gave Jamil hope. Maybe it was some super secret girl thing that no male was allowed to ever know about. Maybe everyone in the room would have to be killed once Najma confirmed its existence. He knows he would at least prefer that over the alternative.

“Jamil, what the fuck? No!? No, that's not normal!? Jamil who do you know that’s bleeding out of their-”

“Don’t have time, I’ll call you back once this is all settled.” He’s never hung a phone up so fast. It quickly rings again, but he just declines Najma’s call and silences his phone. Now looking around, everyone else in the room is just as confused if not more so than he and Azul were.

“...What?” Jade tilts his head to the same degree his brother does while they both study Jamil, each trying to find…something in the conversation they just heard.

Azul spoke up, leaning his elbow against the fireplace, a hand coming up to rub at his temple, “They said they were simply on their period and that this was normal. They were also very certain Najma would confirm this sentiment, claiming it was a natural thing girls did.”

Deuce sat in thought, his brain working overtime to try and piece together the information they had, “Maybe…Uh…Wait, I can ask my mom!”

“What is your mom gonna know, Deuce!?” Ace hissed, more frustrated than actually angry.

“I don’t know, she’s like...an older girl? Maybe she knows more about it than Najma would?”

“...” Jade looks toward Azul with a shrug, “It’s another source of information. We’re literally going in blind with this.” He looks down in worry, feeling Floyd relax in his arms. His brother wasn’t calm by any means, more so his mood had finally reached so low that his homicidal urges couldn’t properly latch onto it. He just kept Floyd in his arms, holding his taller brother under his arms as though he was a cat.

Deuce pulls out his phone with one hand, the other keeping a grip on Grim as the monster whines. It only took a very rings before the phone was answered again.

“Hi, Deuce! I was just about to send you a text. I found this new cafe and they make the cutest parfaits-”

“Mom, that’s cool. Send me a picture later but. Um…I got a really weird and private question to ask you-”

“Deuce, we talked about this sweetie. There’s nothing wrong with liking certain things-”

“NOT THAT, NOT THAT!” He blushes, quickly cupping his phone away from view of the others. He whispers his question into the receiver, waiting with bated breath when the other line was quiet.

“Sweetie. Am I on speaker?”

“Uh, yeah?”

“That isn’t…that isn’t something that should be happening. Is this…Deuce, is this about your friend Yuu?” At the affirmative, she continued, “I know you said they weren’t from around…anywhere really. But you boys need to tell your teachers about this. Whoever told them this was normal lied to them.”

The nervousness returns, everyone sharing a look, Deuce thanking his mom before hanging up the phone. Pass the stray sigh or muffled rambles no one spoke, each one of them was scared to voice their theories. Everything easily pointed toward…assault. But Yuu was such a level of certain that it was hard to deny the doubt that grew at the idea. There were magical ways of getting the truth out of people, they had Jade and Jamil, so it wouldn't be hard. But none of them wanted to break the trust Yuu had given to them. Not to mention the small chance that something did happen, and forcing Yuu to recount the horrible situation was cruel even by Night Raven standards if they were trying to actively suppress it. 

It seemed like they sat in silence for hours before they all heard the front door slam open, footsteps quickly stepping through the hall before a signature black and white coat filled the doorway. Crewel stood with one hand on his hip, the other impatiently tapping his crop against his leg.

“Ok, what’s going on? I’ve had students running around terrified from Sam’s shadows. I go to see Sam to ask about it and he informs me that he sent you runts to check on my puppy.” Crewel looks around the room, his frown turning into a scowl before he schools his expression again, “And there's no sign of my puppy in this pack of dogs, so what’s happened?”

After a prolonged silence, Ace groaned, deciding to bite the bullet since no one else wanted to, “Yuu’s bleeding from…from their vag and won't tell us why.”

…

“...” Crewel stepped to the side, light gray eyes seeming to look past all of them while he used his crop to point down the hall, “Get out.”

“Sensei-”

“Get. Out.”

The scramble they did out of the room was like a pack of dogs released into the wild, each of them refusing to meet the glacier-level stare of their teacher as they ran past. They didn’t leave Ramshackle property, choosing to instead stand outside and wait to be fully dismissed.

Crewel took the stairs two at a time, flinging Yuu’s bedroom door open. The sound of it slamming into the wall made Yuu groan in protest. He walks to the bed and sits, a hand instantly brushing their bangs back to alert them to his presence. He couldn't tell through his gloves, but they had seemed flushed, “Puppy? Puppy, talk to me. What's happening? I can’t help if I don’t know what’s wrong.”

Yuu hums, just barely getting back to sleep before Crewel woke them up again. A hand pressed to their lower stomach and grumbled, “Hmmmm….Period…” “...Pup. What’s a period, explain it to me.” He keeps his hand in their hair, petting in a way to soothe both of them if needed. Period, Yuu clearly wasn’t talking about punctuation. All his mind could reach then was that period was speaking of a state of time. Meaning this was something that happened on some type of schedule.

Groaning, Yuu sits up, letting her head rest against Crewel’s shoulder, “Period, monthly bleed and all that. It’s girl stuff, you know biology, Crewel…”

Taking her in his arms, Crewel rubs at their back. Monthly…It’s at times Crewel is made painfully aware of how lacking he and the rest of Night Raven College were in knowledge about Yuu’s biology. “Yuu…That’s not a thing in Twisted Wonderland.” He can feel the moment they tense up, letting them pull back to look at him.

Yuu stares at their pseudo-father, eyes searching for some sign of the past hour being nothing but a really bad joke. Seeing none, they feel a cold realization hit, “Oh…Well, this is gonna be a real interesting time…”

[mimis-memes]

🍎  ｡:*• ─ FUNNY BIRTHDAY SENTENCE STARTERS.    ›    ( a compilation of funny quotes taken from various birthday cards.  feel free to adjust them to better fit your muses !  )

it’s my muse’s birthday !  what would yours say to them ?

1.     ❝ Congrats on not being dead yet ! ❞ 2.     ❝ One year closer to granny panties ! ❞ 3.     ❝ Free cake !  I mean, happy birthday ! ❞ 4.     ❝ I’ll always be younger than you. Ha ha ! ❞ 5.     ❝ In whiskey years, you just got more delicious ! ❞ 6.     ❝ For the record, you’re not old. You’re a classic ! ❞ 7.     ❝ A late birthday card is better than a late period ! ❞ 8.     ❝ Candles aren’t the only thing getting blown tonight ! ❞ 9.     ❝ Happy anniversary of your umbilical cord separation ! ❞ 10.   ❝ Another 365 days since you fell out of a vagina. Hooray ! ❞ 11.   ❝ This is an annual reminder that I’m super glad you were born ! ❞ 12.   ❝ The older you get, the better you get !  Unless you’re a banana... ❞ 13.   ❝ I’m really glad your parents had unprotected sex !  Happy birthday ! ❞ 14.   ❝ Today we celebrate the only time you won a race. Happy birthday ! ❞ 15.   ❝ I’m glad you were born, my life would be pretty boring without you ! ❞ 16.   ❝ Age is merely the number of years the world has been enjoying you. ❞ 17.   ❝ Happy birthday to the love of my life, and the biggest pain in my ass. ❞ 18.   ❝ I wanted to give you something amazing, but I didn’t fit in the gift bag. ❞ 19.   ❝ Thanks for being born !  It’s a great excuse for us to get drunk and eat cake ! ❞ 20.   ❝ I wish you happy birthday with all my butt !  I’d say heart, but my butt is bigger. ❞ 21.   ❝ You suck... at aging !  Can you at least try to look older ? Happy birthday, anyway ! ❞ 22.   ❝ Happy birthday !  We’ve been through a lot together, and most of it was your fault ! ❞ 23.   ❝ Let’s celebrate your birthday the way you came into this world — naked and screaming ! ❞ 24.   ❝ Birthdays are good for your health. Studies show that people who have more birthdays live the longest ! ❞ 25.   ❝ Happy birthday to the funniest, prettiest, classiest bitch I know... other than myself, of course ! ❞ 26.   ❝ Happy birthday !  Always remember that if you fall, I’ll be there to pick you up... after I finish laughing, of course ! ❞ 27.   ❝ Happy birthday to the smartest, funniest and most beautiful person in the world !  Wait, did I say “to” ?  I meant “from” ! ❞ 28.   ❝ This is not a birthday card !  Because if it was, then it would be late. But it’s not a birthday card, so it’s not late ! ❞ 29.   ❝ I think me being your [friend/girlfriend/boyfriend/etc...] is enough of a birthday gift. You’re welcome ! ❞ 30.   ❝ Good things take time, just like me remembering your birthday. Happy belated birthday ! ❞ 31.   ❝ I didn’t get you anything, but I thought about it. They say it’s the thought that counts ! Happy birthday ! ❞ 32.   ❝ I wanted to send you something sexy, but the postman told me to get out of the mailbox... anyway, happy birthday ! ❞ 33.   ❝ Happy birthday to a [brother/boyfriend/husband/etc...] that has the world’s greatest [sister/girlfriend/wife/etc...] !  You are so lucky ! ❞ 34.   ❝ There’s two things to remember on your birthday. First, forget the past, because you can’t change it ;  second, forget the present — I didn’t buy you one. ❞ 35.   ❝ For your birthday I wanted to give you something that was both funny and charming, but then I remembered you already have me in your life. ❞

[mrs-monaghan]

Hi Shaz, It’s my birthday today but I need cheering up. Can you hit me up with some of your favourite underrated jikook moments and why 💜💛🐰🐤 (and if people can comment some of theirs too if they have any)

First things first, HBD Anon!!!! 🎉🎉🎈🎈🎉🎊🎊🎂🎂🎂🍾🍾🍷🍷🍹🍺🍺🍸🥂🍸🥂🎂🎈🎈

Smile today, don't let anyone bring you down. No matter what. 💜💜

Second of all, u guys that keep sending me asks about my ___ Jikook moments, you are killing me! It's torture. To have to choose from what we have is really hard y'all. It's not easy.

But okay, my favourite underrated Jikook moments. Let's get into it. Again, HBD!! 🎈🎈🎈

Number 1 >> Decoration tah!

For the life of me I cannot explain why I love this moment as much as I do. I just know it puts the biggest smile on my face whenever it comes up in a compilation I'm watching. Idk what it is, I just think this moment is wholesome AF. And when JK reacted to it I DIED!!!! It was everything to me, i was so happy. Of course its underrated, coz they're not really doing anything. Just laughing about and having a good time enjoying each other's company. But I love 2 see it. 😍😍

Number 2>> JK preparing a plate for them and Jimin turning to JK to ask for more soup.

It's so domestic 😭 Because this is how they are on their normal day to day lives. Like Jin told us; JK is Jimin's chef. And as we already saw, JK always makes sure Jimin is very well fed, always. Even blows the soup for him if it's hot and we have seen him feed Jimin many times. This moment, no one talks about, but I just really like it.

Number 3>> When JK was there for Jimin when he got nervous

It criminal that this isn't one of the most popular Jikook moments. The way JK was giving Jimin ALL his attention. The way he was nodding along in encouragement. The way he got closer when Jimin made that mistake. The way JK didn't move back into position until he was sure Jimin had gotten back on track. This moment was e👏🏾very👏🏾thing👏🏾 and I wish we talked about it more. JK did so well as Jimin's boyfriend there. He showed up. He really fucking showed up. I respect this man so damn much for always showing up.

I enjoyed Jeonssy's analysis of this moment. You can watch it here if you like.

Number 4>>> Jimin, kneeling, doing that thing with his tongue while looking up at JK 👀

I think the reason Jikookers don't talk about this moment it's because of how sexually suggestive it is. And you can see the moment Jimin catches himself too. Mans got carried away there for a second. I wasn't around for kitty gang Jimin but I believe it when people say he was wildin'. Like Jimin, please, we know you get down on your knees for the Jungkonda, we did not need a visual. 🙈🙈🙈

I high key love that moment very, very much. 🥵

Number 5>> Jungkook waiting and waiting and waiting for Jimin all because his boyfriend asked him to.

Aish. Y'all don't get it. JK was among the first people who finished. This is episode 126-127. They're some of my favourite episodes that I rewatch all the time. They were so good. Anyway, Mr. Competitive finished 2nd so he was gonna go be among the first people to go home. And he was excited too! But then Mimi said 2 words: Jungkookah, wait. And that's all she wrote 🤭🤭🤭

Y'all aren't getting it. This was actually huge. I wouldn't do that for my sister and I love that bitch. If I finish a game first, and she kept losing and losing and kept me waiting for an hour I would take off. Shit, I'd take off after 20 minutes. You know who I'd wait for though? My partner 😂 Because that's just how it works. Jimin has the boyfriend privilege. Sure this was him being in charge but also this was JK listening to his man and doing exactly what he said. Now I'm thinking about Bon voyage season 4 when JK stayed by the doorway and didn't move simply because Jimin asked. Who said JK doesn't listen to Jimin again? 🤭

Anyway, JK couldn't wait to leave. We can tell by how happy he was when Jimin won rock paper scissors, and yet, he didn't mind waiting for as long as he did for Jimin who finished last. This moment is massive and I think it should be treated as such. 😔

Number 6>> When JK did this.

He probably just wanted to touch his baby. But also, it looks like he made Jimin stop. And Jimin listened and stood there and they did that adorable dance together. The dance part is not underrated. But the way JK touched Jimin is. And I absolutely love this cute, soft moment.

Number 7>> Speaking of touching. This compilation of Jikook touching on stage for the sake of touching. It's actually really subtle and kudos to the Armys who first noticed this is a thing that they do. Jikook absolutely love the stage. JK was asked when he feels most connected to the members and he said he loves when him and Jimin high five on stage. That's when he feels the most connected. He singled out Jimin even though the question was about all of them. And this thing where they touch like this for no reason whatsoever, proves his statement to be true. I freaking love them!

Number 8>> When JK was asked to rate the members and he finally put Jimin as number one. Everyone always talks about JK putting Jimin last in the past. But I'm not sure this moment gets the hype it deserves. This question was stupid AF to begin with but whatever. What I love about this moment is how JK didn't even bother to rate anyone else. He just said Jimin is the most handsome according to his own personal criteria, and then left it at that. Almost like he only cared that Jimin knew he was number one. He wanted Jimin to know he was done playing games. So rating the rest was irrelevant when he'd already made his point.

I also don't think Jimin was expecting this which is a bit sad, idk. But I'm sure he appreciated not being ranked last. Again. However i don't think that was ever going to happen. By this time JK was done pretending he didn't like Jimin on and off camera. He'd stopped pretending he didn't have feelings for him so I think many of us, much like RM, expected JK to place Jimin first at this particular juncture.

Number 9>> Gaaaaaaah! I love this so freaking much!!!! Okay so Jimin is a blusher. We know this. While when he blushes for JK it can be more intense than for other members, Jimin is a blusher. Its a thing he does. JK on the other hand, not so much. Which is why I love this so fucking much. 😍😍 My other underrated moment is JK blushing for Jimin. I literally never see people talk about this even though JK doesn't blush or get shy for anyone else apart from Jimin. I mean look at this!!!

I said look at this!!! Are you looking??

You guys don't listen to me. Did you see?? Especially the black swan one??? Shiet. A bashful JK? Sign me up! JK does not blush for other people. He's not a blusher. Only Jimin can make him that shy. Do y'all get it? This side of JK is reserved for Jimin and Jimin only. He's the only one that affects JK this way. Aaaaah feels. 😭😭😭 FEELS.

It's criminal, absolutely criminal that people overlook shy, blushy JK. I love to see it. I love it so much. I could watch it all day.

Last but not least. Number 10>> This.

I mean, what is wrong with you people? Honestly. By you people I mean antis because... okay first of all, lets watch the video. Not the first part where they sing to eo. That's definitely not an underrated moment. I mean the second part at the concert.

Tweet

Did you see that?

JK doing that 👆🏽 and Jimin doing this, these 2 moments sit at the same table. They outed themselves here guys. And no one was listening. They are telling us look, its him. Its him. They took risks and said fuck it. And they got away with it. Like they get away with everything else. Smh 😑

They literally outed their relationship guys. We should be freaking out more. That moment at that concert is super underrated. And it requires Eagle eyed army to see it. But damn, JK really did that. Wow.

Just wow.

Anyway anon. That's all I got for now. Happy birthday once again. If Jikook isn't real, then neither I'm I.

[ccrisntok]

Ace ship ramblings

So, I have like. An art post planned soon. But until then uhh.

My (and kinda @greyzanticz a little) personal opinion on Ace's romantic compatibility with every other drdt character (I'm bored and sad so we gotta over compensate with complete insanity). I won't have much to say abt most of these, and I'm pretty sure no one ships a good majority of them, I just used every character for shits and gigs

Also idk if Ace ship discord is a thing but if it is please don't flame me if I don't like ur otp. Send me ur ship art instead. Try and change my mind. Dm me a paragraph explaining how Ace and character are soulmates. Also spoilers.

I'm also gonna give them number ratings bc. I can.

Let's start with the classic:

Ace + Levi

• I genuinely think this would be my otp or something if they hadn't fallen out in the 1st trial. After that the idea of these two in a romantic setting just. Doesn't work for me. There's to much genuine distrust and fighting. Them as besties is awesome though! They will be best friends again let me be delusional. So basically, ship it chapter 1, chapter 2 I'd rather eat glass (but no beef to Acevi shippers I completely understand). In a fix it au, it's prob a fav. 7/10.

Ace + David

• I didn't really. Clock this as thing. I think it makes more sense with pre-breakdown David? Like mediator x instigator? I don't really get it but I can understand the basic vibe and it's not... Horrible. 4/10

Ace + Nico

• Yeah if Levi and Ace fighting killed their ship potential for me, this was made to be my no-tp. Maybe in a fix it au, I could stand it. In cannon, nah 2/10.

Ace + Veronika

• Now, I love Veronika. And I love Ace. But oh God I can feel the dysfunction radiating. The basic dynamic is okay though, just don't feel like Veronika could and would do better (find a more interesting case study to date). Obviously as the Halloween trio Ace and Veronika are so besties but romantically, no 💕 4/10

--

Ace + Arturo

•Jesus this would be toxic as hell. I don't really see it, honestly, but I get where. It came from. That's the thing with rare pairs, sometimes they personally hit, sometimes they don't. I could probably like this one if I read a really good fic or something. 5/10

--

(Bonus) The Halloween Trio (Veronika, Arturo, and Ace) as a polecule.

•i think I like this one more because it's banking on Verturo which is prob the biggest drdt ship I have, but idk. Them as a bestie unit is by far my preferred Halloween (or Horror, as I've been calling it 💀) Trio, but them as a polecule is. Okay too. 6.5/10

--

Ace + Xander

•I don't hate this one as much as chapter 2 Acevi, or Nico x Ace, even though Xander and Ace had heavy beef. I think it's bc it wasn't as. Serious as his later beefs. I think I could be convinced to enjoy and enemy to lovers fic with these two, but it's not something I'd actively look for. Also Xander died before Ace went into his "actually being a total dick instead of funny comical relief" era and I think if he'd survived to see it, Ace wouldn't have survived to live it, yk? 6/10

--

(I think these are where the pairings are completely random LMAO)

Ace + Rose

• Okay. So. I don't hate it. But I definitely don't like it either. I feel like Rose would NOT have the energy for Ace in any capacity, and she doesn't like ppl being loud, so. But also the idea of Rose's chill vibes calming Ace down Is cute... 5/10

Ace + Charles

• I don't think this would work. There is like, no chemistry (hahaha) here at all imo? Just doesn't call out to me for any reason. 2/10

Ace + Hu

• I really don't like this. I can't comprehend it. Like when I imagine what this is ship would be like it weirds me out. 0/10. Sorry any Hu x Ace shippers.

Ace + J

• I feel like J has a very real and reasonable distaste for Ace in cannon and I can't think of an instance where they interact otherwise. Their dynamic in my head is just "Crazy bitch and bitch who doesn't like them bc they are crazy" and I can't really think past that. Their dynamic romantically doesnt catch my eye for any reason 💀 1/10

Ace + Eden

• I genuinely think Eden is a lesbian but if we move past that... I still can't see these guys as anything but friends. Like I want them to be besties bc their dynamic is perfect (Angry asshole & the nicest human ever created) but as a couple, I just don't see it. I'll give it a decent rating though, since I understand how their dynamics would be interesting romantically. 5/10. Eden is a lesbian though she told me

Ace + Teruko

• nah Teruko would kill him 💀 the only reason i would want this is bc we would see tons more Ace since Teruko's our protag. But fr I don't really think they would work (take a shot every time I say that). They could probably relate to eachother to some extent though, maybe decent friends if Ace ever mellowed out. I think I read a chat fic once where Ace, Charles, and Teruko were all traumatized besties and I hold faith in my heart that'll be cannon. 4/10

• side note their ship name thing could be 'Lucky Horseshoe' 🤯🤯

Ace + Min

• Min does not have the patience for this mf lets me fr. I don't even think these two ever interacted before the trial 💀💀. Again not much to say, this doesn't stand out to me at all. I don't like it for some reason. 1/10

Ace + Arei

• Ehhhh I feel like they could be really good friends. Like their hateful energies used together could be a force to be reckoned with. And they could probably relate to eachother to a decent extent. But I don't think they would ever date (def not bc I think Arei's a lesbian too... Definitely not...) 3/10

Ace + Whit

•... Okay hear me out. Hear me out. Their dynamics bounce off of eachother pretty well. Silly goofy guy x Menace. Whit has shown he can deal with people who are assholes. I mean ik Whit and Charles are the otp and I'll stand by that forever but like. I could so see Whit trying to give Ace a lil redemption arch. Maybe actually succeeding a little. I like this one a lot. Still, you've kinda gotta squint at it a little for it to work.... 7 or 8/10.

I didn't include Mai bc idk who she is. Could be Ace's cousin for all we know

So, in conclusion, Ace is statically very undatable and he will be alone forever. Have a good day.

This was such a dumb post 💀💀💀💀

[brittanagirlcrush]

Another Unpopular Opinion

Just watched a video that ranked 54 Glee singers.

Brittany was number 42. Now, I know she doesn't have the strongest voice but, by the end of the series, she had definitely improved. I'd have her in the top 25 at least.

My biggest beef was Santana was ranked #5. I was like...say what?

#4 was Elliot Gilbert

#3 was Jesse St. James

#2 was Rachel Berry

#1 was Mercedes Jones

I can agree with Mercedes at #1 (although I tend to flip-flop depending on what I just listened to or watched; Santana doing Girl on Fire and I'm like Oh, hell yeah, Santana is the best. Then Mercedes does I'm Not Going and I'm like, oh, right, yeah Mercedes is awesome).

But to say Elliot and Jesse were BETTER than Santana? Oh... HELL TO THE NO.

For me, FOR ME, Santana and Mercedes were always the best. Hands down.

I always felt Rachel was over-rated.

Don't get me wrong; she has a technically wonderful voice and great breath control and she does those BIG VOICE songs beautifully. (Run, Joey, Run was bad for more than one reason).

But.

Mercedes and Santana have proven they can do them as well (I Will Always Love You? Don't Rain On My Parade?) BUT ... they can also cover fun songs and pop song and R&B songs. Both of them are more versatile performers. They both also have more sex appeal and presence than Rachel. (IN MY OPINION) They OWN their performances in a way that Rachel just doesn't. Not saying she's bad. She's definitely top 10, maybe even top 5 but some of the singers that came through Glee just seemed ... more.

Rachel always struck me as a one trick pony. Big songs, sure. But even Paradise By the Dashboard Lights seemed to be missing something. (Again, FOR ME).

Anyway, just wanted to vent about my belief that "Rachel's great and all but Santana and Mercedes were the top bitches of that Glee Club".

[changeling-fae]

G, L, Y, U for the asks!

Thanks!

G - Have you ever had an OTP? If so, do you remember your first one? Who was in it?

Lol, boy, and how! I live and breathe otp’s. My very first otp was probably Seto Kaiba x Serenity Wheeler, from YuGiOh. They were the first fanfic I ever read on fanfiction.net, lol. First otp ship I ever contributed to fandom for was Sesshomaru x Kagome from Inuyasha, where I wrote my very first fics and did fanart.

Though if we want to get really cheeky, I could argue that my very first ship was the knife and the spoon, from cutlery and making them kiss as a tiny kiddo, lol.

L - Say something genuinely nice about a character who isn’t one of your faves. (Characters you’re neutral about are fair game, as are characters you merely dislike. Characters that you absolutely loathe with the fire of ten thousand suns are exempt, as there is no point in giving yourself an aneurysm over a character that you hate.)

Hmmm, this is weirdly tough for me, not the complimenting part, but because I have a weird metric of how I view characters. Hm, let’s go with… Mizora. I’m overall neutral on her but I appreciate her petty bitch energy. If I were a cambion, I’d like to be as ambitious as Raphael but in reality I’d be like Mizora and I do appreciate a good petty play. It’s the Gemini in me, lol.

U - Three favorite characters from three different fandoms, and why they’re your favorites.

I have many favorites but I’ll go with Harley Quinn from Batman, Grunkle Stan from Gravity Falls, and since brainrot be real, Raphael from BG3.

Harley Quinn has been a favorite character of mine since I was a kid watching Batman the Animated Series. I’ve always been a fan of theatrical aesthetics (circus, theatre, commedia dell’arte, etc) and she’s just such a fun character. I’ve really liked over the years how she’s waffled between villain and anti-hero and how she’s not a perfect victim. Also Harley Quinn x Poison Ivy is a top tier ship.

Grunkle Stan because one of my biggest weaknesses in fiction is a sad morally grey older man but who is also protective of his family. He’s fucked up in his life so many times but he keeps trying. I’m a sucker for that. But also he’s just a great character. He’s made me laugh and cry and honestly that’s just a good criteria for any character. I’ve 100% played the fanmade Grunkle dating simulator and no regrets or shame.

And speaking of morally grey, or in this case, completely terrible older men. Raphael, my beloved. I played BG3 in its EA days and the very first time he appeared I was smitten. His voice obviously but also he had my favorite introduction into the game (and still does). The fact that his devil transformation involved a snazzy belt and different shoes is what really sold him to me. He’s so stupidly extra and it calls to my theatre kid nature, lol. I do miss the EA days of him roasting our camp 5 sec after inviting himself.

All that being said, I just enjoy his character within the game too. I like that he’s obviously a villain but he’s chill with us. In part because he wants something from us but I like that it kinda transforms for him into a double obsession. Obviously, crown comes first but there’s something just so delightfully fun about him writing about our character in his journal (entry number 2 is the stuff ships are made of). That he’s a cringefail theatre kid with daddy issues while being thousands of years old is partly what makes him endearing. I loved finding his fanfiction in his house and I love how stupidly bad his hell domination plan is (you’re doing amazing sweetie).

And one other bonus to liking his character is I got to make new friends and moots in particular in his corner of the fandom. 💖

Y - What are your secondhand fandoms (i.e., fandoms you aren’t in personally but are tangentially familiar with because your friends/people on your dash are in them)?

Hm, I’d say currently, Helluva Boss, I’ve got a couple friends into that show. It’s certainly on my list of things to eventually sit down and watch but for now I see it through what my friends show me. Looks good though!

[em-writes-stuff-sometimes]

Hey, lol. Responding to all of these in a group post because there were a few!

First of all, thank you all for the kindness. I appreciate it. I acknowledge I probably wasn't as nice to this person as I could've been; but I've spent longer on this project than I have for most of my academic or professional stuff - I spent about 2 weeks researching medieval childbirth ALONE - so I am super emotional and triggered when people think they have the right to make up such awful stuff. It isn't even the copying, at this point - it was the fact that, despite my efforts, this person proceeded to gaslight, lie to and outright slander me to others. The comments on their post named me an "immature brat", a "whore", an "attention-seeking bitch", among other really nasty things. Now, I'm pretty sure I called them a fuckwit, but like:

... Self-explanatory, methinks. I'm all for being insulted - in fact, degrade me daddy - but like:

"Immature brat" - bitch, I'm a 25 year old high school teacher, and I'm basically a grandpa going around muttering "these darn kids..." Nope.

"Whore" - literally never had sex. Never seen a real-life peen. Never touched a man. Nope. Zilch.

"Attention-seeking bitch" - the bitch part I can agree to, but I don't actually enjoy attention enough to start drama. Nope.

Thank you, @theladyspooks, for the lovely words. I'm a Daemon stannie all the way, lol! I'll read Aemond, but there needs to be more Daemon content. I was honestly expecting a wave of "you're a fucking bitch", etc. etc., but I'm surprised that people seem to think my stance is logical. For about 5 minutes I gaslit myself so hard into thinking that this wasn't a problem, but then I was encouraged to speak out on it by some of my fellow writers. I've had a couple people tell me I'm wrong, but they both seem to have ignored the Google doc I put together.

And nonnie, thank you for the lovely support - I too had been seeing their updates in the Daemon tag here and there, but work has been piling up and I'm just BARELY finding time to write, let alone do the whole Tumblr thing (I'm sitting on a shameful number of inbox messages to respond to, tempted to give @ewanmitchellcrumbs or @storyblackhold or @flowerpotmage access so they can secretary-ise for me - we're all spiritually one so might as well lol). (On that - I AM reading these, and I do intend to answer them! I just NEED THE TIIIIIIME!!!!!) Someone reached out via anon to me to let me know about these similarities, which I gave a cursory look through and realised they were in fact correct. So I reached out, got that fob-off response, and decided to do some legit digging. And... well, we all know the rest. Again, I would have settled for an inspiration cred. But they decided to be meenie about it, so I was meenie back. Meenie = meenie. I don't make the rules, I just enforce them, lol.

Nonnie; I wanted to cry-laugh at your "then I remembered I'm nowhere near popular enough" comment. At one point, I was yeeting chaps out every single day (yup, that happened lol) to an audience of like 3. I wasn't popular when I started up last September - it takes time, a support network, and genuine passion for what you do. I never cared for being popular, and I still don't - I write my shit because I have so much damn fun with it, and that is what matters most of all. If you have passion for your craft, people will see that, and people will follow and support that. And then you might get plagiarised, lol. But to be serious, I've seen it all over. Some of these people are clearly on the internet because interaction is one of their shittest skills IRL. If you do get plagiarised, nonnie, please, please reach out. As you can see, I fucking hate plagiarism. I hate dishonesty even more.

@lflores2008, thank you, as always, for going to bat for me. You're a crazy awesome person. I could be the biggest cunt on earth, but you're just so, so supportive of me, and it means the absolute world to me. I'm so lucky. This user has come up with a really interesting concept, and I'd have really enjoyed it if they hadn't incorporated my work into their own. In that respect, I see how they misunderstood my meaning; they did not "steal my story idea", which I never claimed they did, BUT they did take my phrasing, some scenes, some smut scenarios and at times essentially changed a few words around for entire paragraphs of work. Plagiarism is not limited to people stealing entire chapters, because only very few people are that stupid. I would've been willing to give this person another chance at engaging with their story if they'd have been willing to correct the similarities - hell, I would've helped them do it, I beta all the time - but instead, I got insulted and degraded. Sigh. Much sadness. Thank you again, boo, for being just about the kindest person ever. ILY.

@actualhawkesworld, the Centrelink comment is so real. It made me feel much better to have a laugh! Thank you! And yep - this is the second time this year that someone has either outright copied me (the Darklina chick) or heavily borrowed from my work (sunurflower). For now, it seems like this individual has taken their work down from all sites, though I have no doubt from the insanity of their reaction that they'll come back at some point. I'll be keeping an eye out for it from now on. The really sad thing is that I would've just settled for a "this work was inspired by..." blah-blah at the beginning of their fic. But instead I was rudely fobbed off and then had lies spread about me. I've tried really hard to be as kind as I can on my platforms, but more and more I'm finding people are taking advantage of that. That's part of the reason I kinda went nuclear on this, lol. People need to learn to stop using me as a free-for-all content mine, because my kindness has limits. I'm human. I do what I do for free, and it's so draining to have others attempt to take credit for the hours I put in to hone my work.

And to the three nonnies to cap it all off:

There's absolutely bound to be similarities! And there've even been some people to reach out and ask permission to borrow certain plot points/style elements, even though I can't possibly claim them as my own. It was incredibly nice of these people, if unnecessary, lol. But what this person did was essentially take my stuff and paraphrase it over and over and over again, at some points just directly copying phrases over. It was well-done, I guess! And don't worry, I reckon a lot of people didn't notice. Even I didn't until I sat down and actually went through it.

Thank you nonnie for the kind words. I'm still toying with a brief hiatus, maybe even a step back for a while - it seems to be over now, but I have no idea if this person is going to attempt to do something crazy like make a bunch of spam accounts to harass me or hate-anon-bomb me or find another platform to spread their bullshit on. I'd like to hope it's done, but people are so toxic nowadays. I really appreciate you reaching out to me!

And nonnie, thank you for the offer! I'd already initiated reporting with AO3 and Wattpad, but it seems that the work has been taken down/deleted/privated on both sites for now. It's only been privated on AO3, not deleted, so I suspect this individual will make a new attempt in future. Hopefully, they have learned their lesson, and they'll rework the similarities.

Thanks everyone. God, I'm just so overwhelmed by all this. Again? Really? I've learnt one thing, though - no more fucking around. If I see people stealing my shit, I'm calling them out by name. Absolutely no tolerance for dick behaviour anymore. I'm completely done being a whipping post for these people.

[theskyexists]

scholomance 2

The first half of this book was a bit slow and not so crunchy, the second was very very crunchy, and the twist worked out pretty well.

things that don’t make a whole lot of sense:

1. why is there a weight limit (this could be explained by saying it takes gallons of mana to bring mass in that way thus weight capped)

2. why does failing the exams literally maim or kill you. i would protest that shit if i were a fucking parent.

3. why the fuck would you need to reach some damn gates to get out when the kids get IN via induction spell and the way out is via unspooling that same spell

4. why didn’t they use the goddamn COMPLETELY FREE healing spell again

5. why not use a reviser to phase mals (MAWMOUTHS) out of the graduation hall.

6. so why exactly does the school KEEP good spells from students and fuck them over so much with exams and languages if it actually IS aiming to keep them all alive. what a weird twist. would have made much more sense if it was simply the biggest mal yet. like why the fuck would it have encouraged El NOT to go after the mawmouth going after the freshmen if it was trying to keep students safe???

7. i still dont understand where mana comes from and why it comes from horror terror annoyance pain

things that don’t make sense to me narratively:

1. why have El go on and on about enclaves and reading and studying and the scholomance is in essence an enclave and not capitalise on that (maybe next book but like...)

2. why was Precious such a bitch about El getting together with Orion? like jezus, they were just dating, just kissing and having sex and falling in love and shit. whats wrong with that my god. yeah shes gonna be devastated and everything bc he lied. he doesn’t love her more than killing mals (a very late dramatic twist bc for the longest time El didn’t even understand he genuinely loves it)

steps forward now:

just keep doing this shit ey? make an enclave type thing as a trap, lure em all in and boot the bit of matter into the void. BAM. exterminator supreme, El!

Like i was like, well now the chances are 50/50 for wizard kids, let’s build a new scholomance, and have the kids come down the maintenance shaft every week to burn the new ones out in teams (new freshman handbook rules, seniors do this so graduation goes way smoother) and especially kill the agglos and re-ward the mortal flame machines. if a mawmouth shows up just revise it out of existence with the revisers you put under everybody’s pillows. since this was never said to cost too much mana - why not.

but now theres a much better option. just boot em out into the void. just do that shit! hope the debris doesn’t bump into some enclave also out in the void.

incomprehensible liveblog:

is she gonna be a teacher???? to these freshman kids?

scholomance is so damn hard on these kids but it does also sometimes act in their best interests....probably to keep them coming

ok so the scholomance is trying to kill her even more desperately. by playing on her protective instinct, by assigning her the worst ever seminars and classrooms

why doesn’t she ASK CHLOE OR ORION FOR MANA OH MY GOD. WHY DOESN’T ORION OFFER IT TO HER

‘Sure, the story is, the enclaves put in some mana, and our parents all put in some mana if they can afford it, and we put in mana with our work, but we all know that’s a story. The single biggest source of the school’s mana is us. We’re all trying to save mana for graduation; everyone’s working on it all the time. The mana we grudgingly put into our schoolwork and our maintenance shifts is nothing compared with the amounts we put away for that rainiest of rainy days. And when the mals tear us apart, of course we grab for all that nice juicy power we’ve desperately been saving up, and they suck it out of us, only built up more by all our terror and final agony and struggles to live. The Scholomance gets the spillover, and then thanks to all those wards, it kills off a good healthy number of the mals, too, and it all ends up in the school’s mana stores—where it goes to keep the rest of us luckier ones alive’

So when an enthusiastic hero—read, Orion—shows up and starts saving lives, and the mals start to starve, the school starts to starve, too. And at the same time, has more of us alive in here, breathing and drinking et cetera. It’s all a pyramid scheme, and if there aren’t enough of us on the bottom being eaten, there’s not enough for the ones at the top.

an explanation!

so in other words, the only thing that comes into this closed system is the kids, and teh mals. and teh scholomance can only grab teh spillover of mana when the mals or kids are killed, or the kids deliberately put mana into maintenance/schoolwork. somehow. i guess there’s a huge loss on the energy when it’s used to kill though. somehow. i guess because the mana is transformed into something else by spells. thus it cannot be sucked up by the school. but it’s happy with Orion killing teh small mals. won’t it be happy with El doing the same?

EXACTLY. ASK CHLOE. REMIND HER WHAT EL CAN DO. FOR GOOD OR BAD.

YES!!!!!!!!!!! FINALLY SOMEBODY GOT THEIR WITS TOGETHER AND REALISED THAT EL IS THE ONE TO GIVE THE RESOURCES

NOW THE WHOLE SCHOOL’S GOT A POWERHOUSE

won’t the new york enclave be upset with Chloe’s alliance?

pretty sad to have el’s work always (still!) be attributed to orion

AAHH there’s a freshman handbook.... which el read ofc but orion didn’t.

Well fucking finally people realised that El’s a catch. I mean - jezus christ. She really could have shown everbody from the start.

what i dont get is if her mother had 7 spellbooks why doesnt she know more of her spells

why the fuck aren’t they inviting orion on their team

Why the FUCK would they stop working on the honeypot if the lute plan mostly worked and apparently Orion has just found the key component of wizard blood. It's essential that Orion pours in more mana into the pool!!! Wtf???

Why think it normal that's 1. Scholomance has it out for El 2. THUS the mals come after her. Just cos the school lets them through or what?

The finals literally main students. SURELY wizards didn't think of that part???? Surely thats the scholomance operating as much within its parameters to weaken the weak further?

Why the hell would El consider all the killing spells she gets useless? The whole point is to kill mals. She could become a literal exterminator outside too.

It really does seem like the wizards have lost control of the school. Why else couldn't they sneak in adults with induction?

How the fuck can I ship Orion and El if he doesn't even get anything ever about her. But I guess his dumbness strengthens her

What are the mouse familiars about...

You're telling me that there's NO magic to keep you from getting pregnant???? Hello??? Aha. The spell gets confused....that doesn't make any sense lol. It's not like a shield spell gets confused when you walk into a gout of flame deliberately to get to the other side of the graduation hall, now does it?

The obstacle course stuff implies that wizards can still adjust things inside the scholomance. So why would they allow the Scholomance to maim those who fail their exams.

I thought seniors got access to way better spells? But El's gotten nothing. Also that reviser trick is great. Why not dump patience and fortitude out into the void like that? And reading so much about enclave spells, I feel like that should give her a way with the reality and unreality of the scholomance.

Why the fuck would El say that mature wizards are the real apex predators. In what sense. What do they hunt

Oh only NOW does El ask the invincible hero in love with her to join her team. What the fuck. And he doesn't say yes? And she was asking him for his safety?

What I don't understand is why they don't share spells. I understand keeping mana for yourself but why not spells??

They actually use the spells they're gonna use at graduation? I mean...isn't that wasting mana. And the obstacle course can kill you. I mean....that's only going to lower everybody's chances right

They're all bloodied up. So let's do a circle spell again? THEY DONT DO THE COMPLETELY FREE HEALING SPELL

Right - ok that explains the casting. If the course fakes the effect then either it's an illusion and illusions are cheaper or the ffect comes out of the general mana pool and we know why the scholomance is always so hungry

Why the fuck would her wither spells not work but khamis firepotion would? Lol

Ahhh now she realises that she must save them all. But! How can she save them all - right?

She should take everybody with her on this course. Yep she is. But she should do it all together maybe.

El is so FUCKING stupid. She never tells people anything. 'oh they won't believe I'm powerful without proof :(' 'oh they won't believe I'll help people :('

Just TELL THEM. Ok just going for it was effective. And now ALL the teams are becoming more and more tightly knit.....

It's funny. El's got the INSTINCTS for bringing people together but she hasn't got the rational thinking for it. That's gotta be her friends dealing with her.

AND she keeps thinking : yeah I'm not doing that, but then doing it anyway. MAWMOUTH here she comes.

Orion is such a dumb brick Jezus Christ. He's really gone down in attractiveness

The SECOND half of this book is actually picking up

El keeps yammering on about how unfairly Orion was treated in the enclave but I genuinely do not see it. She makes deals all the time and thinks them fair. All the wizards do all their lives - and the enclave made the deal with Orion that he'd kill mals - which he instinctively loves to do - and they'd give him whatever. Which I think is pretty damn fair. Just because Orion is SO extremely lucky that he doesn't need any protection and wouldn't have had to come to the scholomance at all to survive - well, that's HIS EXTREME LUCK - which El used to despise in anyone. But if it's natural not social it's fine apparently.

YES!!! LIESEL!!!! ARMY GENERAL!!!!

Since they can't keep more than 300 alive, they're gonna somehow have to go one after the other. But how?

God theyre good. Kept their whole generation from getting eaten much. And now they're tackling graduation like no one else. What about the kids who come after...?

Liesel is so fucking right and El is almost as much an idiot as Orion. Idiot could have told and shown everyone and they could have prepared for FOUR years together.

What's up with this mouse trying to force El to stay away from Orion like she's the manifestation of Gwen's message.

LOOK AT WHAT THEY CAN ACCOMPLISH TOGETHER!!!!!!!!

And look how enormously useful El's death spells are. Should have written some more

EXACTLY. HAH. HERE IT COMES. Thanks sudarat. She's getting them all out. Alllll of em. Yep. All of the seniors. But what about those poor freshmen.....

The title is a bit of a hint. Her friends are gonna pissed when she stays behind.

'im so stupid' yeah El you're smarter than Orion but stupider than most others.

El my dear - you could make it better. You could improve the wards, burn out the mals, teach the children, defend defend defend, for as long as you stay

What would happen on the outside... More and more wizard kids. The lucky ones all survive in scholomance. The others die outside. And the wizard population grows... There really was something to the throwaway comment about wizards being the predators. Ecology ecology.

Maybe.....yeah the scholomance does want to be better. So.... It was nice to Orion because he was protecting kids. And it was hard on El to attempt prod her into action... After all....it gave her the sutra book, and kept her in the aisle. Not to keep her from helping Orion but to allow her to get the book. And it tried to get her out of the aisle when the mawmouth was there. Because it wasnt sure she could kill it. It put her with freshmen and led mals there to test her and to prepare her.

Thing is, if what's in the graduation hall is just so horrible - then them repairing the burners probably didn't work, and all those seniors died.

Oh right. It probably did work, and that's why the mawmouths are now desperately hungry.

Oh what. Oh no. Oh what the fuck. Where are they.

If the induction spell can drop you into your new room, and graduation is actually the reverse. WHY EVEN HAVE GATES.

'what do you want me to do?' she asks. And precious thinks it's obvious?

So the school made her care about everybody and told her look: you can.

Hmmm. But this is a very strange narrative twist. I was really getting into the whole army preparing to survive together by helping each other. And now there's nothing?

why the FUCK would the narrative go this way wtf.

I thought she would get everybody out, have to heroically fight patience and fortitude and then push Orion and Aadhya and Liu out with the sweep spell bc she'd stay forever to keep every generation safe.

But I guess that's....not it.

Ok but this is inconsistent because last year they were very much afraid of a full grown agglo coming through the doors down to graduation. (edit: that was an argonet apparently)

Ok I understand that a mawmouth is bad news but uhhhh El and Orion went down there and fixed stuff and didn't come across a single one. Like. Yeah yeah the little ones are faster but like...

But seriously why is there a graduation hall and not just a reverse on the induction spell

What WOULD work as a plan apart from dropping the whole school in the void is creating things that eat the agglos but which have a destruct button from a distance. Also simply reverse the induction spell to make graduation unnecessary. That having been built in really makes me feel like there's a hidden "lure all the mals to scholomance so they don't overwhelm all of wizard kind' agenda behind it secretly maybe perhaps.

So now I understand why the honeypot shit was in there. Don't understand why the narrative made it fail on small scale though.

Why make graduation only half an hour?

Also. Orion Lake leaking some sort of eldritch stuff out of his eyes certainly should have made an alarm bell go off in El's head perhaps.

OK SO. I think it's silly that a new mawmouth is given as an excuse that they can't keep killing the agglo's and repairing the mortal flame machine. Especially because the mortal flame took whole layers off of fortitude and patience. If you just dodged around the mawmouth /shielded enough - whichever came in in a couple of years, and you've got lots of space now - then you could easily keep it down if not kill it. Also - if the whole point was that Agglos are destroying the flame machine - specifically agglos - then I'm pretty sure that the narrative should have had El notice them chewing on the flame machine in the graduation hall when she was there. And a mawmouth is only a long term risk, they could improve odds for 5 years at least by regularly taking the maintenance shaft down and blasting any new mals to bits. Like every month. Or am I underestimating the presence of a single mawmouth? They really instantly want only a permanent solution.

More importantly, I'm a bit sad that instead of this development giving them space to create a whole new culture, one of all for one and and all for one, which will improve all of their odds enormously and make the experience hugely more pleasant - a culture they could pass on to the freshmen etc if they continue to root out mals together, perhaps hey, in teams from the start, patrolling,etc. but maybe the culture shift will happen outside as their whole generation is now in serious solidarity with each other.

This is one way I can see the prophecy working out in an unexpected positive way. El casts down the enclaves through true solidarity and reducing the desperate dependence that indie wizards have on enclaves. Also makes a mass killing in mals.

One more thing though is why don't they just let their kids get adopted by mundanes. Or idk invited mundanes into their house at all times? Whystick to the nuclear family. Grab your mundanes - grab homeless people off the streets and make them babysitters! Get a mundane nanny bodyguard! Jeeze. get four!

Two other ways I can see this plan go horribly wrong though and fulfilling the prophecy:

1. patience and fortitude are loose. Where did they go? More importantly - where did the Bangkok enclave go.... Can mawmouths traverse the void? Or...did the mawmouths simply roll out and go back hunting in the real world? Two huge impossible to kill mawmouths? Because Orion and El managed to deprive them?

2. There's a lot of ecosystem-type talk - reproductive rates, survival rates and predator Vs. prey. What if it was a good thing that all these wizard kids died? That is to say - it kept balance. This ties into one of my questions: how did wizards survive at all when 6 in 7 kids are normally eaten? It is said that mals used to be less powerful and hungry.... What changed so rapidly ? Or were wizards simply having loads and loads of kids to beat the odds? (seems unlikely to me)

El has often misinterpreted the Scholomance, and I think it's wrong to think it would evenhandedly keep kids safe. I'd say it absolutely does not - and picks off the weak to power itself so the strong can survive.

Im not into this romance anymore. El is so constantly worried about Orion - and yes he's shown himself dumb as a brick, dumb enough to get himself killed almost a dozen times. But! He's so completely blasé. He's never ever shown himself to align with her sense of injustice about his serious desire to simply kill kill kill them mals.

They're literally going to escape like tomorrow. So just fuck already! Jesus! Ok finally.

EXACTLY. Jezus did they really need to have sex first for Orion to set El straight on how he's not been damaged by his parents and enclave? He's just LIKE THIS. he loves to kill and slurp up mana. That's who he is. Lol - but she really can't deal with it. She kept trying to blame the enclave but ITS JUST WHO HE IS.

SHE REALLY STILL THINKS THAT ORION HAS SIMPLY BEEN TAKEN ADVANTAGE OF. WHAT IS WRONG WITH HER?????

Please do NOT die Liu. DO NOT DIE.

Oh right ok that's the crux. He thinks he's weird. But he IS weird. But that doesn't mean he can't pursue happiness.

I do wonder.... HAVE THEY ACTUALLY TESTED THAT THE SONG WILL LURE THE MALS AWAY FROM THE WIZARDS ACTUALLY LITERALLY STANDING THERE IN LINE

Also I wonder.....whether she's gonna have to kill another mawmouth

An obstruction eh.....might....that....be...a....mawmouth....

Ok but if the induction point is where the kids go back, and it is ringed by adult wizards, and ringed by hungry mals, how are the mals getting past the wizards. And also...if they've lured lots of hungry mals to the induction points and the kids are going back there........

Are they expecting a mawmouth tho. Like there's two still HERE!!!!!

Lol finally El understands and BELIEVES Orion. Jezus when he tells you something El - LISTEN. STOP THINKING HES NOT RIGHT IN THE HEAD. now she understands.

Please tell me that the kids going out didn't all get eaten. This isn't that kind of book right.

Why did they not expect a mawmouth. And why was it able to get through the fucking refusalshield??? That doesn't make any sense???? Was Alfie already out???? Oh it wasn't UP to the gate.

Liesel is so damn smart lol. She's so much smarter than El. TAKE THE DAMN MINDPHONE EL OR YOULL NEVER BE ABLE TO CALL ORION THROUGH THE FUCKING GATE

What the FUCK Orion.

Jezus Christ. He can't even fucking kill it! Oh my god.

[moni-logues]

2022 End of the Year Recap

rules : post the top 5 works you’re most proud of that you released in 2022 (not necessarily your most popular), your top 4 current WIPs that you’re excited to release in the new year, your top 3 biggest improvements in your writing over the past year, your top 2 resolutions (ways you wish to improve your writing/blog) for the new year, and your number 1 favorite line you’ve written this year!

So, @amethystwritesbts tagged me in this on the old blog, but I thought this would make for a fun little transitional post, too, so I'm doing it here! I have had my [old] blog for almost exactly 53 weeks and have posted 58 fics! 🤪🤪🤪 lots to pick from lol

Top 5 works I'm most proud of

(These will all, in time, make their way here, too, but for now they are ofc readable @monimonimoon)

Marriage or Arsenic: my very first post! I'm proud of myself for starting! Proud of myself for writing and putting it out there!

Sweet Treats: I just like it!! I think it's fun! I love cute tattoo artist boyfriend Jimin!

Even Though: super spontaneous fic; decided about 11pm I wanted to write it and it was finished before 2:30am! But I'm really pleased with how it came out and it's nice to know I can produce shit if I really focus lmao

Thirteen Rounds: wrote it in one evening and then was really unhappy the following day and couldn't work out why I didn't l like it so I took my dog for a walk and figured it out. It then needed a really big, significant re-write and I did it! And then it did some serious fucking numbers lmao

A Fine Line: for obvious reasons lol. My first series! Wasn't sure I could do it! Wasn't sure anyone would like it! But I did! and they do!!

Top 4 current WIPs

The Comeback: here, have a banner! This is going to be the first fic I post here! (obviously not including AFL reposts). I hope you are looking forward to some festive angst!

Kintsugi: the long-fabled Yoongi friends-to-lovers (actually strangers-to-friends-to-lovers!). She's coming and, goddammit, I've made this bitch angsty, too. Have another banner!

Promessus: a Hobi fake dating fic that is going to require a lot of research and may not be viable if the results of that research aren't what I want! But I'm really excited about it!!!

SUPER TOP SECRET FIC: coming soon! Yoongi! A genre I've not written before! Stay tuned!!!

Three biggest improvements in my writing

I think I'm more aware of my (over-)use of adverbs now so I'm better at catching them while writing and in editing.

Writing long stuff! Actual plot! When I first started, I couldn't believe people were writing like, 5, 10, 15k fics and now I not only have one-shots that long but also a whole series! And more to come!

Deciding to only write in past tense. I kept sort of switching between past and present which meant that, even within one fic, I kept fucking up and writing in the wrong one. Sticking to one means I'm not making that mistake (as much! 😬) anymore.

Two resolutions for next year

This one is sort of already in plrogress but planning. Kintsugi is already outlined! I'm going to try to stick to the plan!

Read more -- both fics and books. I have read much less this year than I'd have liked so I really want to use this festive period to reset and start the new year with more intention and waste less of my time on my fucking phone, watching shit I don't care about on netflix etc. and actually make time for everything, which includes reading.

Favourite line I wrote this year

Remember how I said I've posted 58 fics? Yeah, I'm not going through those to pick out the best lmao. But one that I can think of off the top of my head is:

you knew you had somehow got things figured out but now, in the nauseating throes of the consequences of your own actions, it eluded you.

I'm not tagging anyone because idk who's been tagged already and I'm copping out lmao but everyone should do this, so consider yourself tagged if you are reading this!!!

[finiffy]

I have sat down for about 2 hours and managed to write a good amount of the sites. I would write more but I gotta go to bed early for a school thing. I should've been writing about Wondertainment and goi found family but Adhd has hit me in the head.

-----------

Site 0: A little spacey in the head since they handle unreality based scps and sometimes it gets to them. They switch between extremely observant and "dude, there's this thing behind you, it's round and dark and has a little pointy thing on its face. It makes a weird sound." "bitch that's a crow." ''oh." Oldest sibling but only site 1 and Foundation remembers that fact

Site 1: Responsible sister, is considered the eldest of all the site even though her sibling 0 is right over there. Second in command in the entire operation right next to Foundation themselves but often acts as head since Foundation is busy with handling Ci/Goc and also the paperwork part. Really wants to disappear into a wall.

Site 5: They are the definition of "Sometimes i still hear their voice." "Hey I'm not dead yet!" Since an scp has messed with their life and made everyone think they're dead. (In reference to Scp-4182) They’re not dead, they're literally sitting in the same room as the family.

Site 06-3: There were originally two other site 6 but they're both dead due to containment breaches/the area turns objects into spiders (?? I don't get it) Currently, they're not a big fan of being the third site named 6 but only having easy to contain humanoid scps is a good trade off. Still sad about the number of formal Scp employees being sent to them. I feel like they have decent social interactions with everyone in their site and family.

Site 11: They are very good at furnishing houses on the account that all humanoid scps not yet assigned to a containment site goes to them and they want to make a good impression. Also, they're pretty strong since a good amount of the time, the scps try to escape from their houses and it's up to them to catch them. Perhaps a theater kid and a major pet lover.

Site 14: "420 what you smoking-" Okay but they're the ones who have to deal with the Goc and Ci's bullshit, check new employees so the foundation doesn't accident hire a agent, have a sped dial for therapists, make sure all electronics are at tip top shape, handle phone calls on anomalous sightings- They tend to crack jokes during important family talks since that's what they always do with stressed callers.

Site 15: Actual site that handles electronics, the offical IT worker in the foundation, and has the magical touch of making every device suddenly work by just touching it.

Site 17: Second biggest site next to site 19. Is "this" close to losing it with the Goc and Ci for the amount of times they’ve been attacked for their precious scps. Almost always in a cast of some sort but that doesn't stop them from kicking ass. Constantly complain to Site 1 about their father's sucky ass dating pool along with Site 19.

Site 18: They love all the animal scp even though over half of them can totally kill them, and take care to make the entire process as easy for both, themselve and the scp. Probably has a lot of normal pets. Isn't the site that handles biological research.

Site 19: Biggest site of them all, problem child and absolutely despises Ci. They're almost always injured somewhere on their body and it's functionally mandatory for them to be in a hospital bed at least twice a week. Also complains about their father's dating life, openly, to their dad. Things get veryyy awkward sometimes.

Site 23: The site that handles biological research. Has a lot of dead/inactive spcs as well as animal scps. At some point was dumped with a few humanoid scps but they don't really care. Probably the first to really bond with the Goc about just killing the super ultra dangerous anomalies but their dad wouldn't approve.

Site 28: Get them artwork/artifact scps, which is somewhat easier than holding a living scp. But man, why the hell do they have to work with an apartment building as their space? At least their siblings get much better spaces to work in.

Site 34: They don't really specialize in any sort of work, sometimes they handle medicine for their other siblings, sometimes they have to keep an immortal rose that destroyed a shop that one time. They know also know Spanish.

Site 36: They are doing a very convincing military base look for their area, they hold scps, honestly, there's like 12 other sites just like them. They do also have to live with a village that may or may not be alive and needs to eat but they're doing okay! (Fear)

Site 38: Pulling a really good "I am completely normal" look. Only contains inanimate objects scps, is also assigned to keep watch over Alexylva University. They do like space and star watching on their free time.

Site 41: They pretend to not exist. Why? Cus all their scps tend to be hard to remember or to spread information and their grand plan is to also act like they don't exist.

Site 43: If no one else can contain a scp, just send it to 43 they'll know what to do! Probably has the most crackhead ideas for containing scps and you know what? It's actually somehow working. Not many of their siblings like how batshit their ideas are or how it's working but if it gets the job done, then they can't complain

Site 44: They study everything based on folklore or cryptids. They are the cryptid hunters that everyone's been joking about and they will find bigfoot/j

Site 45: Scps that have potential to be weaponized for the Foundation or be used in technological advancement are sent for 45 to test out. They've also been forced to live in the basement as a young site/hj

Site 45 (i know i already wrote about 45 but there's two of them): Got all religious and mythological scps. They were a huge mythology bust as a kid but now they pray that Heracules isn't real, they do not want to try to contain a man that killed a 7 headed hydra.

Site 54: Is very stressed on the account that all their scps are partially uncontainable, please, sometimes give them a good message and a blanket. They're also ridiculously skilled at anything relating to combat.

Site 55: If site 14 has Goc and Ci, then they get Wondertainment. Theyre the ones at the centre of the Goi research, which leaves uh, a scarring impression on their dad's dating life. They also can also cook since they are disguised as a food cannery factory in the daytime. "By day I cann food, by night i deal with Wondertainment and their mother fucking toys!!!"

Site 56: They also hold a lot of scps since they keep on taking more and more responsibilities. They don't know how that happened but they can't back out of this. Please, they just had to contain the kraken, what happened?

Site 62: Bad and Naughty dimensional scps are sent to 62 for containment. They had to keep a door locked. How did everything get so complicated?

Site 64: Their job is to monitor a forest and also a Goi that works with anomalous events and creatures in the forest. They also research material synthetics whatever that means.

Site 65: They work as a cement factory and also educate new scientists on what's an anomalous animal and what's just a normal animal (at least, that's what i got from their description…)

Site 66: The evil sibling to site 23/j/lh Okay, they also work with biological and organic scps but they don't put I'm the same care as their siblings.

Site 73: Luckiest site period. Only has to research safe class scps. It's the fucking dream for site 19, 17, and 54. Also has to manage satellites but at least they don't have any Keter class scps.

Site 76: Got all the man made scps and they often sit in their chair going, "How the fuck did someone do this to you?!" While talking to an anomalous tennis racket.

Site 77: The poor site has been through a lot, got born in 1924, proceed to get destroyed in world War 2 and a containment breach before being rebuilt in 1944. (Wait how would that work- gets shot) They got better though! :D

Site 79: Also a little spacey in the head like site 0, but no one can blame them when their work consists of dream anomalies, video game anomalies, and logic puzzle. That gotta be taxing on their brain. Would you believe me if I say that they also have a Goi to keep track of?

Site 81: Was only assigned to scp 2812, then proceed tk be one of the biggest sites in the Midwest. Also has a lot of Mtf for some reason.

Site 83: Luckily got safe and Euclid scps and is somehow not stressed and actually very relaxed! They help alleviate stress off their siblings as best they could.

Bio site 84: Contains most anomalous Australian animals and any animals imported to them. They also take good care of the animals.

Research site 87: Research anomalies in sloths pit. Like many of their siblings… sorry I don't know what to put here.

Site 88: Holds humanoid scps and also a couple high value scp objects. Could be a research site but chosen not to.

----------

Please give respects to Saint Motel for making a good song never dies bc that carried me throughout this project.

-soap

SOAP.....WHAT

You are insane...I can't believe you actually wrote about all these sites for the humangoi au

[crystalelemental]

Okay, just a dev letter, no update, but update almost definitely Monday so we’ll see what the deal is.  Oh man, let’s fucking go lads.

Steven Stone is the trainer lodge unit, which means he is in the Lodge rotation, which means I am spending until he’s 5/5 there.  It’s time.  After all this time, finally he’s ready.  I’m stoked.

They’re going to allow 6* EX pairs to upgrade without changing costume.  This is so transparently the answer to MU and Solgaleo, but honestly I fucking called it.  I said this shit months ago on Reddit, that we’d definitely get the EX for them but there was no guarantee of a costume swap, and look who was right!  The good news is, they reference multiple sync pairs.  Which could, and goddamn better, mean the BP units.  There is no reason for the Master BP units to not have EX, given how otherwise middling they are.  I will EX Mesprit so goddamn fast...

I will state for the record, I fucking love that they’re keeping the mystery element.  There are four sync pairs connected, and we get to know two of them.  First is...Steven Stone.  I said it in a separate post, but god I am living.  “They only give girls alts, it’s gonna be Lillie lol, DeNA just favors waifus.”  Shut your fucking bitch mouths, idiots!  Steven Fucking Stone, first to six alts, suck his magnum dong!  Interestingly, they went with shiny Stoutland.  He’s a tech that “Weakens opponents and powers up allies,” which sounds very akin to Winter Whitney.  The Buddy Move sounds pretty nice, though Atk/Spd are less valuable than if it were both defenses.  But apparently he just gives allies SEUN, and can apply +3 physical moves up next on an ally, and lower the type rebuff of the target’s weakness, so this dude is...why is he not a support again?  No sincerely, it sounds like he doesn’t do a whole lot himself, but he’s really good at supporting someone else’s numbers.

Shauna’s the other, and you know?  I’m down.  I don’t dislike Shauna, but I do dislike her outfit.  This one’s cute.  And her partner is Klefki, which isn’t what I would’ve expected, but it’s a cute partner for a detective event.  Steel-type support, so like...guess I’m getting that one too.  I already kinda love it; each time it attacks, it has Team Stat Leech 9, lowering a random stat on the foe then raising it for the team.  The question is, if it lowers at random in 3v3, then if you hit Atk on one, Sp Atk on another, and Def on the third, does it raise all three for the team?  I’m curious.  She also has a randomized version of Dawn’s Power Siphon for all core stats, and trainer move applies status move defense (kinda mid, just make it condition shield), stat reduction defense, and +2 crit for the team.  So she’s going to be great in Gauntlet, but CS is going to be too inconsistent to work with allies who can’t support their own offensive needs.

UUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUGH.  Okay kids, here we go.  2500 points in Master Mode.  I’m gonna be honest, half the time I don’t even like 2k.  I don’t like a lot of the parameters, I feel like it can be annoying and frustrating for little reason.  And more modern CS has a tendency to already cause problems.  This feels like a little much.  It might be fine, though.  Truth be told, before the 2k meta, I practiced at 2.5k with way worse units, and I handled it fine with far, far fewer tools (context: this was like November 2021, when the biggest names were SC Diantha and Lear; I was using Summer Lyra).  Still, I dunno.  I guess it will depend on the rewards.  It better be Champion Spirits.  I have some needs.  But hey, QoL improvement, we can save and load paramter layouts.  And apparently they’re going to add new options, so maybe the new parameters will be less shit.

Okay, we have confirmation on the new CS mode.  One type will be effective, which is...wild to me.  I’m assuming that means you need five strikers in that type, what a nightmare.  The mode focuses on E4 and Champions from across regions, so I’m assuming this plays like Karen/Grimsley/Sidney meet up as Dark-types and something like Bug-types are effective?  We’ll see.  But I’ve officially abandoned all hope of true joy, as they state there will be only one special sync pair, making an appearance as a champion.  Which...I dunno, man.  I want to twist the words to mean “They’re not usually a champion but they’re like the crowned champion for this event” and say “It’s Psychic types and Caitlin is supreme overlord!”  But Steven just hit six alts which means it’s officially fair game for everyone else so like...it’s probably Cynthia.

New event called Trainer Files.  That’s cool, little mini-stories with characters and-KANTO AGAIN, ARE YOU FUCKING REAL RIGHT NOW?  Goddammit, fucking Kanto, go AWAY

Ugh.  Well that ended on a downer.  But by and large, it sounds pretty fun!  I like the Steven and Shauna alts, I’m really excited about the other two they might bring in, and the new CS mode does sound legitimately fun.  2.5k Master Mode has me a little nervous about F2P clears, but we’ll see how it goes.  And Trainer Files, while focusing on the blight that is Kanto, sounds like it will ultimately scratch my itch for more character-centric stuff.  I’m happy with this update.  Not thrilled.  Not until they confirm a Caitlin alt.  Or Roxanne, actually, I’d kinda settle for either at this point.  In fact...why isn’t Roxanne in this detective event?  She’s smart, she can be like the forensics character.  Maybe in the second half, eh?

[wack-ashimself]

With Overwatch 2 coming out today, for free to play, I thought it might be time to write a post to gamers for this, and similar titles.

QUIT BEING FUCKING DUMB ASSES!

I will give you the top 3 reasons I lose in overwatch and paladins*.

3-Cheaters, hacks, and smurf** accounts. Happens WAY WAY WAY more in paladins, and with blizzard demanding your fucking phone number, it's gonna be hard in overwatch 2, but I promise, it will happen. So when it does, report the FUCK out of them. It DOES help us all.

2-Find friends. Make friends. Cuz one of the BIGGEST reasons you will lose is you go in with 1-2 friends, and the other team has got a FULLY STACKED team who have played together (this is cross platform, so there's gonna be a LOT of fucking people joining overwatch 2 today. MILLIONS), each know their role AND the rounds perfectly (doesn't help these are mostly the same rounds from overwatch 1), and they all have a fucking mic. GET A FUCKING MIC!*** Sure, you can play and win with randoms, but it is not an average thing, promise you that.

1-Know and play your fucking role! The SINGLE #1 reason I lose is because people would rather be the BEST PLAYER on the losing team, rather than be the worst player on the winning team. It's all to show off. 'I got the best K/D. YOU cost us the game, not me.' Mother fucker-you got the best K/D cuz I was healing you while being shot at, while you killed the others from behind, avoiding the ones shooting me. If you didn't have the best K/D, you'd be a fucking moron! These include, but are not limited to: flanks/Damage people who run off to get kills, but protect NO ONE but themselves. Heavies/tanks that run off and play like they are the DPS. Again, not protecting anyone. And last but not least, the one that isn't done all that much, but when done, does the most damage: the healer that doesn't heal. Usually playing attack. Tanks: SHIELD EVERYONE. You are bullet sponges. DPS-Stay behind them and kill anyone attacking their shield or your healers. Healers-HEAL! For fucks sake. Their objectives are in their descriptions!!!

I say this for noobs and experienced gamers alike. Cuz I have played with people WAY WAY better than me, they get the highest score, and we lose SUPER BAD because they were more trying to show off than win. That's it.

*as far as I know, overwatch stole most of their ideas from paladins. Powers, character types, etc. BUT...paladins is a worse game. By far. Unbalanced, and more cheaters than ANY GAME I HAVE EVER PLAYED IN MY LIFE. Instead of fix their own game, they just add more characters (with basically a rehash of other powers). I mean, they got 2 of the best ideas, and overwatch 2 stole 1. The first is only ONE of ANY character per team. Aka, no duplicates. Like a real battle. And the second is only 5 characters, which overwatch 2 is switching too. Which is funny...overwatch 1 costed money. Paladins was free. Overwatch 2 is free, and they are stealing ideas from Paladins again. Blizzard, you have no fucking shame. I don't mind if you steal ideas, but own up to it. Oh, and Paladins allows you to block characters, which I love, BUT....again, back to the unbalanced, the same.....6 of 10 people are almost ALWAYS blocked, so it shows they are highly advantaged.

**I only learned the term in the past 2 years, but smurfs are assholes who create new accounts cuz they are so high leveled so they can SHIT all over low leveled players. I call them out, and every time they say 'I'm just trying to help a friend.' BULL SHIT. You're not only giving him a HUGE unfair advantage (there's a reason super high ranked can't vs low ranked), but, if you wanted to 'help him in the game' it doesn't have to be ranked. But it is ranked, every time, isn't it, you lying bitch!?

***if you have a mic, do not communicate at all during the game, then turn it on at the end and talk shit when we lose, you are the worst kind of fucking person on the planet, and gonorrhea would be a gift to you.

side note-Of course there have been matches we lost partially if not entirely to me. And it's usually cuz...I broke those rules above I mentioned lol I was being a selfish asshole.

[speci-society]

hey guys do you want a really long LIST of SONGS that basically is only interesting to me

here’s a lost of my top 5 songs from 3 artists/bands that mean the most to me musically and artistically (Coldplay, Lemon Demon, Ween) as well as just 5 other songs not from those artists but are songs that i also like a lot right now

TOP 5- WEEN

5. Don’t shit where you eat- oooghhh just a nice easy listening song

4. Hey There Fancypants- ashamed to say i haven’t listened to Quebec all the way through but I’ve listened to most of it and idk! I just like fun sillygoofy songs. also there’s this fan music video that was uploaded on youtube in like 2006? And it’s so fun, im not a music video person im a “i make my OWN imaginary mvs in my HEAD and OCCSIONALLY on paper” but i like that music video so so so much

3. Ocean Man- I mean this song was my introduction to Ween so yeah ofc its on here lol? And also that it’s just a great song Lol?

2. Transdermal Celebration/Buckingham Green- I’m not cheating by putting 2 in one slot bc these songs both itch the same part of my brain that likes epic ween songs that for some reason I associate almost exclusively with Terraria bc I listened to them at around the same time I was getting back into terraria in 2019 lmfaooooooo

1. Waving My Dick In The Wind- IM NOT BEING IRONIC ABOUT THIS. This is 1000000% genuine this is my favorite ween song of all time and always has been and more than likely always will be. Tbh it’s in my top 3 fav songs of all time i’ve ever liked from any artist. It’s got memories attached to it. It’s one of my favorite songs to play on guitar. This song is literally like a part of my being. Yeah bitch i AM waving my dick in the wind. You really SHOULDVE seen ol jimmy wilson dance. If it all goes right i’ll be in your arms tonight. yeah bitch

honorable mentions: Freedom of ‘76, Wayne’s Pet Youngin’, I Can’t Put My Finger On It, all of The Mollusk, everything I’ve heard off of Quebec so far

TOP 5- COLDPLAY

yes it is a little funny having Coldplay wedged between lemon demon and ween but i’ve been listening to coldplay nonstop since i was born and that’s not an exaggeration. My great grandma bought my parents a cd of Parachutes around when I was born

5. Talk- man this song just makes me feel a way. it’s so nice. i’ve got so many good things associated with it. Minecraft is the biggest one btw for some reason. Probably bc i listened to this album a lot in 4th grade when i was suuuuuper into Minecraft for the first time. also a coldplay song i relate to in lyrics more than most coldplay songs

4. Violet Hill- VASTLY UNDERRATED. i fucking love angry coldplay songs so much. there’s angrier songs that exist i know. but we’re talking about this band. 

3. Arabesque- mmm best song from Everyday Life  no contest! Half of the song is a saxophone solo! This is a coldplay song I literally made an oc to and unlike some of the others I made when i was 9 my boy stuck around. shoutout to my oc Pixie. yeah bitch you are two angles of the same view

2. Hurts Like Heaven- i have so many good associations w this song. This album came out when i was i think 8 or 9? Like. PRIME age when I was starting to get into art and writing. I made several ocs to this song. It means just so much to me. the whole album does tbh. It was the first concert I went to and it was one of the best experiences of when i was that age

1. Viva La vida- i mean what would I be saying about myself if it wasn’t high on the list anyway. Genuinely the best Coldplay song I think. Not even remotely controversial i think but still

Honorable mentions: God Put A Smile On Your Face, High Speed (tied for number 5 tbh), Champion Of The World, Cry Cry Cry, A Head Full Of Dreams, Any of them that make me Bawl my Eyes Out it’s a lot to list. you can imagine which ones

TOP 5- LEMON DEMON

5. The Ultimate Showdown of Ultimate Destiny- then GANDALF THE GREY and GANDALF THE WHITE and MONTY PYTHON AND THE HOLY GRAIL’S BLACK KNIGHT and BENITO MUSSOLINI and the BLUE MEANIE and (i mean its a classic. number 5 on a top 5 list feels right)

4. Spiral Of Ants- SONGS THAT MAKE ME CRY one time i wrote about the emotional impact this song has on the album as a whole for a school project. i wonder if i still have it saved somewhere. i hope i do

3. Bill Watterson- NUMBER ONE CATCHIEST SONG EVARRRR and its about STALKING THE CREATOR OF CALVIN AND HOBBES yknow there’s this music camp i go to every summer and next year is the first year i’m gonna be a counselor, and all the counselors and volunteers get to perform a song on their own during one of the lunch periods in the week and ik its about 11 months away but i think this is the song im gonna play. its so much fun to play. whip out a guitar right now and look up “bill watterson lemon demon chords” its so good on the ears

2. Eighth Wonder- top most feel good songs ever tbh. more songs need to be exactly like Eighth Wonder. this is what i want my music to be like when i make music. if you arw Mad. -_- Okay if you are Hate Eighth Wonder -_- Okat BUT   We are not fighting :3

1. The Ocean- THIS IS A SONG ABOUT ME. BTW. if my dna and brain matter were cloned to be put into an analyzer that could turn dna and brain matter into a song it would just come out with The Ocean by Lemon Demon again. 

Honorable mentions: Amnesia Was Her Name (consider this at number 6), Spring Heeled Jack (consider this um. tied with number 6), The Satirist’s Love Song, Sundial, Lifetime Achievement Award, Action Movie Hero Boy (which is my dad’s favorite lemon demon song), Reaganomics, Soft Fuzzy Man which is my favorite song to play on guitar

TOP 5- OTHER SONGS (not necessarily in a hard order this time)I 

5. Suburbia Overture (etc.) by Will Wood- I only just listened to (some of) The Normal Album like a week ago but DAMN im kind of madly in love with all of it. there has gotta be a genre of like.. works that satirize suburb/WASP/fundamentalist culture. shit like this album and Moral Orel and that one video about how Christmas with the Kranks is a movie about a cult, it all exists in the same space in my brain yknow? I’m calling it “suburban horror” but theres gotta be an actual name for it right

4. Come Along by Cosmo Sheldrake- not to brag but listen ive liked cosmo sheldrake since like 2017. i dont even use tiktok. apparently one of his songs was mega popular on tiktok for a bit. i wouldnt know i dont use tiktok MY POINT IS this song fucks. top 10 songs i make imaginary animations to

3. I Palindrome I by They Might Be Giants- if Ween, Lemon Demon and Coldplay are the 3 artists that mean the most to me, TMBG is the 4th of those artists. shoutout to every other TMBG song but this one’s here bc it’s the one i’ve been listening to the most lately. catchy. i love it

2. Income Tax by P’tit Belliveau- my mom showed me this song a few months ago and i don’t speak a lick of french but yeah bro. J’fais rinque d’avoir mon income tax return. sometimes i just go around the house and all i’ve got in my head is “J’fais rinque d’avoir mon income tax return Tonight we gonna watch it burn” and if you listen to it the same thing WILL happen to you

1. I Don’t Feel Like Dancin by Scissor Sisters- what a crime it is that they made this song the most danceable song on earth! im sure that was intentional but What a crime nonetheless

[authorracheljoy]

Apply to anyone!

What is their darkest childhood memory?

What is a bad habit they have to overcome?

What interests you about their journey personally?

What does a perfect world look like to them?

What smell or scent reminds them of home?

What's their biggest regret?

What do they fear losing the most?

Do they have a certain spot they like to hang out at? If so, what is it?

Have they had a family member let them down? If so, how did it affect them?

Are they afraid of being alone?

Are they proud of who they are?

What keeps them up at night?

Did they have a fave stuffed animal as a kid?

What was their worst injury?

What was their bravest moment?

Who can make them smile no matter what?

Woo! Another ask!! :D Random number generator landed on Giselle so I'm gonna talk about her for this one! ^^

What is their darkest childhood memory?

Ummmm I don't have much developed as far as Giselle's backstory goes? Just from the point she was turned onward BUT since she was born a witch, there's potential to have a spell go drastically WRONG D: And it could've scared her into not using her magic... even in self defense...

2. What is a bad habit they have to overcome?

Playing with her food >:)

3. What interests you about their journey personally?

Just. her inability to express love in ways a vampire just can't </3 Like there are some future events that are gonna shake her (most revolve around spoilers so I won't bother going into detail~)

Also, she's a bitch to Toni!

And she's using Henri and Gavin! I mean, she set them up to DIE just so she could turn them and all that spoilerly jazz~

4. What does a perfect world look like to them?

Any world where she has complete control of her relationships/emotions :X

5. What smell or scent reminds them of home?

Sage because of her youth as a witch ^^'

6. What's their biggest regret?

Not loving someone harder </3

Also I like to tell myself that deep DEEP down she loved Henri at some point...

7. What do they fear losing the most?

Her relations...

Her sanity is a good second :X

8. Do they have a certain spot they like to hang out at? If so, what is it?

She likes the nightclub scene, I suppose~

9. Have they had a family member let them down? If so, how did it affect them?

Nah, her whole caster family was a nice, issue-free one :X

It's the vampire-infested 'family' that's so goddamn toxic... especially when it comes to relationships (see Gavin's one-sided affection for Giselle...)

10. Are they afraid of being alone?

YES (even though she won't admit it)

11. Are they proud of who they are?

For the most part yes... I mean, she surely didn't enjoy being a vampire in the beginning of her immortal existence but over time she grew cold and detached... and vain and proud and jealous.

So over centuries, she became proud of herself, in only that she's a bloodsucking monster. Believe me when I say she's only HALF accepted that!

12. What keeps them up at night?

No joke, being jealous of Henri and Toni >:3c

13. Did they have a fave stuffed animal as a kid?

Nooooope! Stuffed animals didn't exist yet, I'm afraid~

14. What was their worst injury?

Being staked in the abdomen instead of the heart, being pinned to the floor by it? (is that a spoiler? MAYHAPS)

As a witch, though, it'd have to be when her coven was attacked by vampires :X She and her family were very much injured then...

15. What was their bravest moment?

Being honest with Toni about Henri (which WILL HAPPEN I SWEAR I JUST NEED TO WRITE IT)

'Cause otherwise? Giselle's a pure COWARD

16. Who can make them smile no matter what?

Maria, her witchy partner who I didn't get to mention at all... UNTIL NOW of course! :D

Thanks as always for the ask, Friendo!! <333

[girl-by-the-lake]

Just some (long) rambles through a strawberry field...

Ya’ll life has thrown a bitch a break and given me some major Wins lately. I went up to my summer camp last weekend, and not only did I get to go up a week early, it just... okay, I know it’s so cheesy, but it ~healed~ my soul. 

Ya know, life is tough. Gas is so expensive, ROE V WADE GOT OVERTURNED WTF, trying to find a full time job instead of my two part times even though I really like them, etc. etc. 

But then I got to go back up to camp. This is a camp that this is now my 5th year working there. Only like... 5 leadership staff knew I was coming, so when I walked into the medical center to take a covid test at 10:30 Thursday night, and I saw a returning counselor, she *flipped* *her* *shit*. Much screaming and then shushing ensued. The next morning I went to help the campers set up for breakfast, and I ran around outside to get stuff. The amount of surprised faces, full “look backs”, and “NO WAY, SHUT UP WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?!?!” Was enough to totally blow up my head. XD And it only got better. Everyone was so nice. 

Last year was a total shit show due to understaffing which then led to tensions and drama because everyone was overworked, overtired, and if you were like me, doing the work of 3+ people. 

But right now... it’s so chill. Since I’m in a weird position, I just helped with whatever needed to be done. I did programming, led and planned multiple all camp activities, participated in dance parties, ran archery, hung out with the art people, and I got to see all of my favorite girls and give them the BIGGEST hugs. We talked about our love of Heartstopper, gushed over our favorite animes and manga, and exchange friendship bracelets and letters. One of my favorite girls had found some charms that reminded her of the Heartstopper doodles, and she gifted them to me. :’) And the new staff are so nice!!! They always are, and I’ve always gotten along well with them, but you guys... I was so nervous. I was so nervous and scared and sick to my stomach with worry and anxiety that my girls would’ve outgrown me and I wouldn’t make friends and it would be so awkward being there. 

I lost count of the number of times new staff came up to me saying how excited their girls were that I was there and that they kept on gushing over how happy their were and how nice I am. :’) One new counselor, who I want to make more of an effort to get to know next weekend because she seems *sooooo* freaking cool (!!!!!!!), came up to me on my last night and I shit you not... she said “Summer, I am so happy that I met you. My girls are so happy that you’re here, and I’m so happy that I got to meet you too.” Like????? WHAT?!?! THAT’S THE VALIDATION I’VE BEEN CRAVING! THAT ALL MY DEDICATION AND HARD WORK OVER THE YEARS TO MY CAMPERS AND TO CAMP ACTUALLY FREAKING MEANT SOMETHING!!! AND IT HAS!!! 

Campers from every! single! age group want me to sit and eat and chat and hang out with them. I know girls from the oldest group all the way down through the youngest. My first campers ever, when they were in my cabin for our first years, were 8 years old. They are now going into high school!!! And they’re amazing!!! We have these “teams” at camp, and each team has 2 leaders. Over half of the leaders were one of my campers at one point or another, and I am beyond proud of all of them. They are all strong and kind and supportive and fun and smart and beautiful and I adore them. 

I don’t know how the rest of the summer will go, but I was this to document that at least for one 3 day weekend... life felt next to perfect. I was at my favorite place, with my favorite people, and I was surround by friends and people who genuinely like me and wanted to spend time with me and catch me up on everything that’s been happening and just... be around me. And that was fantastic. I can’t wait to see them all again. 

Beyond that, my readings have all been fun, I have boba and my favorite food, I bought food for the week, bought stationery and the CUTEST strawberry backpack from Target plus a dinosaur lunchbox, my favorite youtuber is uploading again, I’ve been writing letters, working out, and just... I’m going to float along with these good vibes and happy thoughts for as long as I can and document as much as I can so I can remember that even when I’m in tough spots, it *will* pass, things *will* get better, I *will* find friends who care about me, and life *will* get better and so worth living. So... idk. I post a lot of angsty “my life is hard and I am a struggliiiin” posts, so I thought I’d finally pop in with a hey! Life’s pretty fucking great right now (if I Roe v Wade being overturned.... which .... that’s hitting me slowly but surely).

Anyways. That’s all from me!