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#number one cheese man
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trevor and jack are the same in that they both have a teammate with excellent eyebrows who makes them more tolerable and who they are also obsessed with
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flowercape · 2 years
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belos brainrot
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bumblingbabooshka · 1 year
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Amanda Grayson with her Hubby and Stepson
#I wanted to redesign Amanda Grayson bc I like her flamboyant old woman look but when she's young they always style her look very bland#and proper...and I want her to look like kind of a hippie teacher mess#Amanda & Sarek - annoying girl x killjoy guy#we are each insufferable in our own unique ways#Amanda has a way of getting to people - whether it's good or bad depends on the person but she's someone you remember and who it's easy to#end up talking to for hours and Sarek realizes this too late...before he even knows whats happening he's grocery shopping with this woman as#they both complain about how BRIGHT the store lights are#Sarek: (on date number five) ..........I have a son by the way / Amanda: Aw shit. Let's go to chuck E Cheese.#Amanda goes into Sarek's quarters for the first time and is like this place is AWFUL!! and by the end of the week she's redecorated.#She built him a bedside table. He bought her a pair of gaudy earrings which she loved but didn't get herself during one of their shopping#trips bc she exclaimed 'Ugh! Who do I think I am!?' and speed walked away#Also last bit of personal lore but Amanda told Sarek (as a joke) that before they got married he should ask her father first#(she said this bc Sarek asked her to marry him on like the second date since Vulcans don't date - she said no)#so when Sarek meets Amanda's father he asks the man to marry him - misinterpreting her words (Amanda DIES laughing)#Sarek seems straight but tradition is tradition - if he has to marry Amanda's dad before he can marry her he'll deal with it#Stepmom Amanda swag...she's gonna give this grumpy lil boy a piggyback ride and giggle about his dad with him#anyway...I like this version of Amanda - she makes her own kombucha and insists you take a jar home with you#Sarek/Amanda#star trek#star trek art#Sarek#Amanda Grayson#sarek art#amanda grayson art#bea art tag#Sarek calls Amanda : dear darling beloved blossom my heart etc#Amanda calls Sarek: elbows knees bigntall sharpie etc#the times she calls him stuff like 'honeycake' and other such stupid-sweet things are times he pretends to find baffling but cherishes 4ever#couple that has a list of things to ask before they eat at a new place#Is it vegetarian? Is it kosher? Is it organic? Is it spicy?
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angelbambisworld · 2 months
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Oh, Daddy~
2000s Gene was just a whole 'nother vibe yknow? Like this decade was where he peaked at being Daddy af. Not to say that he isn't now but like cmon yall just look at him!
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be-good-to-bugs · 1 year
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my love cannot be bought with 72 boxes of mac n cheese. do keep sending them though ♡
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freepassbound · 2 years
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Fuck, that was wonderful. 🥲
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imwritesometimes · 2 years
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I seriously and honestly like don't know how every single episode of reservation dogs is perfect but holy shit it is
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nomaishuttle · 9 months
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ordered sonic.... yay
#11 dollar order judt a footlong coney and medium tater tots. Paying 18 dollars for it 😭😭😭😭#+5 dollar tip#sighhh. oh well worth it for delicious chilidog reward guys im so excitef#i dont even particularly want a coney i just rly rly rly want a chilidog. and a coney is technically a chilidog#ideally id just have my girlfriend hormel hot dog chili my other girlfriend oscar meyer hotdog my other girlfriend great value cheddar and#my fourth girlfriend white bread. but country girls make do.#my best hotdog tip btw for you dogheads out there. looking at you anubis#AWESOME JOKE! the crowd went wild. snyways the tip is to cut it in half b4 u microwave it.....#or like however yr cooking hot dogs ive had them every which way. microwave is most convenient boiled makes me nostalgic grilled#also makes me nostalgic but for more idealized nostalgia. boiled hot dogs r nostalgia 4 the like. being in poverty Not that im a povertyfan#LOL. and not that only poor ppl... boil hot dogs just like idk it was a very cheap meal Boiled hot dogs and great value white bread and#great value cheddar and hormel chili. exceedingly cheap. and Most of my comfort foods r that way#shoutout to keilbasa and potatoes shoutout to keilbasa and mac n cheese SHOUTOUT TUNEY MAC MVP MVP MVP NUMBER ONE TUNEY MAC#one thing abt poor ppl foods is that if u have a meat you can just put that shit in mac n cheese and thats a meal.#not just poor ppl i think everybody should just be likr Fugg ittt can of tuna in the mac n cheese. sry guys im like tuney macs number one#advocate. im so tired of being told its gross or weird lol. sry. everybody go eat tuney mac NOW !!!!#but yes anyway#i love the cheesedogs yk the ones with the cheese in them.. and those ones i alwaysss cut them open even tho i ate those eith no toppings a#lot. it just gets them likee. yummy idk man..#and obvi its convenient 4 toppings and stuff. not oarticularly cheese but chili? brother you need to make a bowl for all of that or you#wont grt optimal chili spreadage.#my other hot dog tip is 1. go to steak n shake 2. order steak frank 3. cheddar cheese cup on the side 4. with fries 5. get the likee#seasoning whatever idk i stole an entire thing of it. hut its just at your tables or you caj pay 13 dollars#but rly its incredibly easy t hust steal it and its yummy LOL. you put that on the fries#you put the cheese on the frank hust pour it#its liquid cheddar yk. yumm#then you put fries on the frank too. and any leftover cheddar you dip the fries that arent on the frank jn that#This is my birthday meal ive had it every single birthday for the past like 10 years Except for 2021 I Dont Particularly Want To Talk About#My 2021 Birthday. HAPPY SWEET 16 TO ME !#well actually i do want 2 talk abt it bc its sad 💔 bc of covid and the like steak n shake was closed EVEN FOR DRIVE THRU and it was lik
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matchingbatbites · 4 months
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Happy Valentine's, all. <3
Eddie doesn't want to be making this call. Literally the last thing he wants to be doing is making this specific phone call, but he'll be damned if he lets his asshole of a roommate get away with this.
After a moment the ringing stops, and a voice says "Hello?"
"Uh, hi, is this Steve?"
"It is, who is this?"
"It's Eddie, Jake's roommate? I got your number from him." Well, from his phone when he'd left it unattended one day, but Steve doesn't need to know the details. "I really, really hate to be making this call, especially the day before Valentine's, but uh. Jake is cheating on you."
The line is silent for a moment before he hears a weak "What?"
Eddie's eyes squeeze shut at the heartbreak he can hear in that single word. He hates that he's doing this, but knows it needs to be done, for Steve's sake.
"I got home from work not too long ago, and heard him with some girl in his room. I took a video, if you want proof, but I just- I thought you deserved to know."
There's a bit of shuffling on Steve's end, along with a soft sniffle. "I, uh. I don't need the video. I believe you. I'm not all that surprised, if I'm honest."
He huffs a laugh, the sound so self-deprecating that it makes Eddie's stomach twist in empathy. "Guess that makes me three-for-three on my long-term partners cheating. I'm starting to wonder what the fuck is wrong with me."
That last part is softer, like Steve was speaking to himself, but Eddie hears it and frowns, because- because Steve is lovely. He can tell that Steve is beautiful inside and out, always kind with just enough sass to make him so fun to be around.
He's always makes sure to talk to Eddie every time he comes over, even if it's just a simple greeting or goodbye, and whenever he cooks at their apartment - because he's a great cook - he always makes enough for Eddie to have some as well.
It feels wrong to hear Steve talk like this, like there's something about him that needs to be fixed. Like his previous partners were right to abuse his love and trust, instead of treating them like the treasures Eddie knows they are.
Before Eddie can speak out to reassure him, the man continues. "Thank you for telling me Eddie. Spending Valentine's alone is gonna suck, but I guess that's better than spending it with someone who doesn't care about me."
"Spend it with me."
Eddie isn't sure where the request comes from, but as soon as it leaves his mouth, it's all he wants.
Steve gives a soft "Huh?" and Eddie repeats it, "Spend it with me. A boy as pretty as you shouldn't be cooped up inside on a day like Valentine's. Let me take you out, try to salvage it for you at least a little."
Steve goes quiet, and for a solid ten seconds, Eddie is sure that he's about to be rejected.
And then Steve says "Jake was supposed to pick me up at 6:30 tomorrow. I'll come by yours at six instead, so I can break up with him before we leave. Is that okay?"
A sigh of relief, and Eddie slumps into the wall behind him. "Sounds perfect, Stevie. Wear something nice, but casual, okay?"
"I can do that. I'll see you tomorrow, Eddie. And thanks again."
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Jake comes across Eddie the next evening as he's packing the last of the food into a bag. He's spent the last hour or so getting it ready, making sure it's all perfect even though it's nothing too complicated.
A meat and cheese plate with some fancy crackers, a jar of the pickled asparagus he's recently become addicted to, a bowl of diced fruit and a box of fancy chocolates he'd splurged on.
He'd even dropped money on a bouquet of roses, and he already has a few comfy blankets and pillows packed into the back of the van. Everything perfect and ready to go. When Jake sees his preparations, he lets out a low whistle.
"Wow, Eddie. Trying to impress someone?"
Eddie shrugs, trying to be as nonchalant as possible. "Yep. It's our first date, so I want it to be special. Didn't wanna go the usual, boring, fancy restaurant route."
He's sure that's what Jake had planned for himself and Steve, and it's confirmed by the way his nose wrinkles. "There's nothing wrong with spending money on your date, Eddie. If you have the money to spend, that is."
Jesus Christ, Eddie can't wait to move out of this fucking place, and away from this fucking asswipe.
"Anyway, I've gotta go pick up Steve soon, and I'm planning on bringing him back here tonight, so maybe see if you can crash with your date, yeah?"
"Sure thing-" Eddie replies, though he's interrupted by the sound of a knock ringing through the apartment. He grins wide, knowing exactly who it is. "That must be my date. Can you grab that while I finish up here?"
Jake rolls his eyes but complies, and Eddie freezes in place, not daring to make a sound so he can hear whatever interaction is about to happen.
The door opens, and he hears Jake's confused "Steve? What are you doing here? I'm supposed to be-"
"Yeah, we're not doing anything anymore. Ever again, actually."
God, Steve sounds so bitchy, and Eddie fucking loves it. He grabs the bag of food and the bouquet of roses from the counter, glad that he got dressed beforehand, and makes his way to the entry.
"What are you saying, Steve?"
"I'm saying that we're over, Jake. Maybe you can call the girl you fucked last night and take her to dinner instead."
Eddie turns the corner in time to see Jake's stunned expression, clearly not expecting Steve to throw that at him. He takes a moment to bask in the fire burning behind hazel eyes, until they slide to him and that fire vanishes, replaced with something sparkling and delighted.
"Hi, Eddie," Steve says, his demeanor changing like the flip of a switch, and Eddie beams. He steps closer and offers the bouquet of roses, along with a "Happy Valentine's, Stevie."
The money Eddie spent on the flowers was worth it to see the blush that floods Steve's face as he reaches out to take them.
"Oh, thank you. That's really sweet of you."
"What the fuck is happening right now?"
Eddie and Steve both turn to look at a very petulant and confused Jake, and Steve just smiles. "Well, you just got dumped, and my Valentine is about to take me on a date."
It takes a moment, but something must finally click, because Jake's face goes red with rage. Eddie just grabs Steve's arm, guiding him out of the apartment before the man can actually do something.
"So what's the plan?" Steve asks as he takes Eddie's hand, lacing their fingers together as Eddie leads him to his van.
"Well, uh. The next town over still has a drive in theater, and they're showing some old romance movies tonight. The drive to get there is pretty nice, and we'll actually have some time to talk, and then- I have some blankets and pillows in the back of the van, and I brought food so we can do a picnic during the movies. I mean, if- if that sounds good to you."
Steve's eyes are sparkling again as Eddie rambles, and he squeezes their hands in delight. "That sounds perfect, Eds."
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By the time Eddie gets home late that night, he's learned two things:
The first is that Steve had already been debating on breaking up with Jake before this whole fiasco, but the thing stopping him was that he actually likes being around Eddie, and he thought wanting to hang out with his ex-boyfriend's roommate would be too weird.
The second thing Eddie's learned is that Steve's smile tastes like dark chocolate and sunshine, and kissing him might just be Eddie's new favorite hobby.
(Eddie does eventually show the video to Steve, just to reassure him that he didn't break them up so Eddie could date him instead. The only comment Steve makes is "She's definitely faking, his dick game isn't that good.")
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mistercrowbar · 5 months
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Sketchy lineup of origin companion (+Aldiirn) body type headcanons because I really would have like to see more variation in game. And c’mon the guys all dumped Strength they shouldn’t have six pack abs.
Thoughts under the cut!
Lae’zel - her being the shortest mostly because its funny to me. I legitimately did not realise she’s small & thin in game until most of the way through Act 1 because she’s so freaking intimidating. So she’s just like, mini murder machine. Utterly ripped keeping with the in game look for githyanki, trying to keep her shapes sharp and muscle bodies short. No boobs because githyanki lay eggs and honestly I find them weirdly out of place on her body.
Astarion - Slim and svelte, to seduce, not scare. I know canonically Larian said he’s 5’9” but look we need at least ONE guy to be short and it’s going to be Astarion.
Aldiirn - Soft body befitting a soft heart! Also to appear non-threatening. He’s active pre-campaign so the pudge stays consistent until he transforms and tummy hurty. :(
Shadowheart - Bottom heavy with muscle that can still be seen under the fat.
Wyll - gets a pass at having the default figure because he was making a career of the hero hobo thing already. But a bit less defined.
Gale - Good hearty chonk. Fat. Man’s been cooped up for a year, lost his magic (I assume casting costs calories), and has a penchant for wine and cheese. I figure he would slim down a bit due to being more active during the campaign (and certainly the cheeses are less fine on the road) but still remain the heaviest. Not gonna be beholden to if this is act 1 or act 3 tho because I am still learning how to draw fat on guys.
Karlach - BEEF. Gets the Gamagoori treatment where she’s as big as she needs to be to be the biggest in any given frame lmao. Still, keep her muscle shapes on the rounder side (compared to lae’zel especially) because she’s a sweetie.
I didn’t draw the non-origins because HONESTLY I get overwhelmed at the number of companions wheeze but Halsin gets the bear look and is a smidge taller than Gale, Minthara is like a more filled out Lae’zel, and Jaheira and Minsc as they are in game.
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todayontumblr · 1 year
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Thursday April 13th.
ffs neil will you stop banging out those damn tunes. it's the morning, for pete's sake
We won't ask you again, Neil—we have work first thing tomorrow and it is a big day at the office: we are presenting a keynote pointpower slideshow for the big cheese over at HQ to increase optimum brand synergy across all departments ahead of this upcoming 5th annual quarter in review, and we are getting pretty sick and tired you and that f*cking keyboard playing Clair de Lune (badly) on what you have apparently decided to be your very own live IRL ten-hour loop from early evening through the night until the break of day, because you are a rat, and rats are, of course, nocturnal!! 
*
It all began on April 13th, 2006. Neil's alarm went off at around 7:30pm, just as the human world was winding down for the day. He sat on the edge of his bed, yawned, stttrrreeeeeeeeeeeeeeeetcchhed, cracked his fingers, and got to work. He tucked his tail beneath him and took his place at his grand, multi-colored piano, and began to play. And my goodness did he play. As if possessed by the spirits of the maestros of old, Neil's claws flowed up and down the keys in a manner not dissimilar to the ebb and flow of the oceans themselves. No one could believe their ears on that day, almost 20 years ago: after so much early promise, so much self-destruction, torment, and pain, Neil finally accomplished what so many knew he could do if only he could find it in himself to achieve it: he began banging out the tunes.
Only this was something of a pandora's box. It is, as we saw, nearly 20 years later—and Neil continues to bang them out with a vengeance, regardless of whether we have to be up early for work in the morning.  
*
It is April 13th, 2009. Neil continues to play, enraptured by the majesty of the melody expressed by the delicate touch of claw on key in primary-colored plastic. As Neil reaches the end of the day's performance, a young man stands in his bedroom. It just so happens that this is the young man's birthday. Though it was thirteen years ago he was given life, it is, inexplicably, only today he will be given a name.
His name is John. As was previously mentioned it is his BIRTHDAY. A number of CAKES are scattered about his room. He has a variety of INTERESTS. He has a passion for REALLY TERRIBLE MOVIES. He likes to program computers but he is NOT VERY GOOD AT IT. He has a fondness for PARANORMAL LORE, and is an aspiring AMATEUR MAGICIAN. He also likes to play GAMES sometimes. 
As day dawns, Neil closes the fallboard upon the keys of his instrument for another year. John goes to retrieve his arms. And the rest, as they say, is history.
*
It's April 13th, folks. You know what that means: it's time for #homestuck and #neil banging out the tunes.  
Go bananas x
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something something nico liking the post the devils instagram made about jack being an all-star and completely disregarding their birthday posts for his own birthday
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whateveriwant · 8 months
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Beside
Simon was the perfect boyfriend, until he wasn't.
~1.2k words. Angst, mention of alcohol, mention of sex/18+. This is just a little something that was plunking around my mind.
Simon Riley, who met his younger, civilian girlfriend at a rundown pub one night. 
You noticed him the moment you entered your local dive, not just because he was a new, handsome face in the crowd, but because of an inherent magnetism that seemed to pull your gaze to him. Though he was a bit older than you were used to chatting with, that didn't stop you from accepting his offer of drinks when he approached you at the bar. And after sharing a few friendly pints and a few more-than-friendly touches, he ended up heading back with you to yours for the evening, and the rest, well, was history.
Now, it's been over eight months since you first got together, and you couldn't be happier. Simon is probably the best guy you've ever been with. He's kind, smart, funny as hell, and fucks you like no man ever has before. He really is the perfect guy for you, just with one small caveat: how rarely you get to see him.
Because of his job in the military, he's gone more often than he's in town. When he's not jetting off to God knows where, on average, you spend about a week with him each month; maybe a week and a half if you're lucky, though you rarely are. Hell, he's away so much that he doesn't even bother holding a permanent residence anywhere. His home is his little corner bunk on the base across town – the one you've still yet to visit, despite your asking. 
Naturally, you've tried floating the idea of having him move in with you permanently, but he's always assured you that he's content as is, that it'd be more stress than sense to relocate so far away from his work. 
And you understand, or at least, you try to see it from his point of view. Simon's always been a private guy – a man with no family or friends to speak of, apart from a few colleagues he's forced to interact with semi-regularly. His choice to not want to cohabitate is not an indicator of his feelings towards you. He simply likes having a little space purely to himself, that's all it is.
But even knowing that doesn't make it any easier of a pill for you to swallow. There's only so much that late night calls from private numbers can do or so many pretty gifts in the post that can fill the void Simon leaves whenever he's not around. He's there for you as much as he can be, you know that he is, but you just can't help that you still want more.
It's one night, about five weeks since you've last seen your boyfriend, that you decide to treat yourself to a little pick-me-up. You're at a store that's a bit out of the way compared to where you normally shop, but they have that cheese spread you really like, so it's worth the drive.
As you're mindlessly perusing the shelves, looking at everything and nothing in particular, a noise coming from the aisle over has your ears instantly perking up. That sound. You know that sound. The deep, rumbling timbre that almost has your knees buckling in the middle of the shop.
You follow the noise, sure your ears are mistaking you, but pause mid-step the moment you round the corner. There he is. Your boyfriend. In all his tall, strapping glory. You'd thought that was his voice seeping through the cracks between the shelves, but couldn't quite believe it since you didn't think he'd returned home yet.
You grin, overjoyed to see him, and take a step forward to approach. But just as soon as you move, you stop dead in your tracks, suddenly confused as you take in the scene ahead.
Simon's standing directly beside an overflowing trolley. But not just any trolley. One that holds two little boys, both looking not even old enough to attend school yet.
The sight has you stunned, the smile on your face faltering. Who are these children? And why is your boyfriend watching so closely over them? 
You're trying to decipher the situation from afar when another figure quickly grabs your attention. A woman, a few years older than yourself, walks up beside the trolley your boyfriend guards. Simon turns to look at the woman as she places something in the cart, a warm smile curving her mouth when he notices her. The children seem happy to see her return, and upon inspection, they appear to be her sons – the same hair, same eyes, same smile as they gaze up at her.
But the boys’ reaction is not what concerns you, what has your stomach twisting itself in tight knots. It's the way Simon reacts that leaves you stunned, that has you dumbstruck beyond all hope for redemption.
Simon, your boyfriend, smiles just as happily back at this woman. Simon, your boyfriend, gives her that look you’d only ever seen reserved for you. Simon, your boyfriend, reaches out to softly caress her cheek. And Simon, your boyfriend, leans forward, closing his eyes, until he's connecting his lips with hers.
A second passes, maybe five or six, where you just stand there, watching, unable to comprehend what you're seeing. Your mind feels like it’s firing at a million miles an hour, but it has nothing on how fast your heart is beating, threatening to bruise against your ribcage. 
After a moment, the two of them pull back, looking like a picture ripped right out of a catalog. The woman reaches up to brush some hair off Simon's forehead, a ring glinting on her fourth finger catching your eye with the movement. The oval cut diamond is especially blinding as she then drops her hand down to her middle. Your pupils pinpoint as she rubs her swollen belly, which can't be more than four months along, you'd wager.
As you look between them – the woman, the children, the man you've been with for months – slowly, so slowly you think your brain is made of wet cement, the pieces of the puzzle finally click together in your mind.
The realization makes you feel instantly lightheaded, thinking you're seconds away from emptying your stomach all over the shop’s freshly swept floor. Your throat slowly constricts, your hands beginning to shake, and before you can register what's happening, your basket of groceries falls to the ground with a clatter. 
The resounding noise draws the attention of all the nearby shoppers, including a pair of familiar brown eyes that immediately snap to yours. You lock eyes with Simon for just a second, before you're turning on your heel, abandoning your supplies in a scattered mess. 
Tears flood your vision as you flee the store, your body on autopilot as all you can think about is getting out of there. You're trembling as you fumble with your keys, dropping them twice as you bolt through the car park. When you finally reverse out of the lot, you don't even notice how a car or two honks their horn in warning. You hear nothing but the blood rushing through your ears, the static buzzing loudly around your skull. The voice in your head is shouting, absolutely screaming at the top of its lungs.
My God. My God. What have you done?
__________
A/N: Just so we’re clear, Simon Riley would never ever cheat. But for angsty fanfiction purposes, let’s pretend like he would, okay? Okay, cool. Anyway, I’d love to know what you thought! Thank you for reading, and I hope you enjoyed!
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virginsexgod69 · 3 months
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❝ Video Star — ✩❞
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pairing (Season 7) Negan Smith x f!Reader
cw smut, unprotected p in v, slight humiliation, pussy slapping, bow jobs, name calling/ pet names, sex tapes, porn photography?
summary You and Negan have some fun with a digital camera you found on a run.
note ahh this is my first time writing for negan, so i hope it's okay... jdm is just tooo fine. i have wild thoughts whenever he's on screen 🫦
1.5k words
...
"Smile!" you said before snapping the photo, taking Dwight off guard. The picture was blurry and unfocused and due to the flash, he was squinting and not even looking at the camera.
"The hell?" he questioned looking at you crazy. "It's a camera, duh. Found it on a run," you explained. He walked off in an annoyed huff leaving you wondering what crawled up his ass and died. You continued walking about the sanctuary taking pictures of unsuspecting people.
"Laura! Say cheese," you prompted the blonde woman as she approached you. She rolled her eyes and held her hand up to the camera, affectively ruining the picture.
"Negan wants to see you," she said. You turned off the camera and looped the strap around your wrist before heading toward his room. What is was he wanted, you had no clue. Your relationship with the man in charge was an odd one. Toeing the line between wife and solider, you had no clue where you stood. Sometimes he sent you on runs, other times he spoiled you with little treats so you wouldn't have to spend any of your points. Once, when he called you in to have a glass of 30 year old scotch with him, the two of you ended up fucking in a drunken haze which lead to regular hookups. You knocked on the door once you arrived and waited patiently for him to let you in, wondering what he wanted and hoping it was to hook up.
He opened the door, revealing him leaning against the door frame in his white t-shirt with Lucille in hand. You stood there nervously, not knowing what to say or what mood to expect from him.
"You just gonna stand there lookin' stupid or you gonna come in?" He asked. He had such a way with words. You stepped into the large room and let him lead you to the couch by the small of your back. You sat in the chair facing the couch he took a seat in.
"Got a little somethin' for ya," he said with a wolfish grin on his face. You relaxed a little as he seemed fairly happy.
"What is it?" you asked, excitement lacing your voice. He reached behind his back and tossed a ball of white fabric at you. You held it up and revealed it was a sheer, lace babydoll dress. Heat flooded your cheeks as you realized that he expected you to put it on.
"Um...could you look away while I change," you asked shyly.
"I've seen you naked, been inside you, but you don't want me to see you change?" he mocked.
"Neeegaan," you whined. He rolled his eyes with a sigh, but covered his eyes with his hand nonetheless. You made quick work of stripping off your clothes, including you underwear, and put on the sheer number. It was a bit small. It struggled to contain your breasts and stopped at your mid-upper thigh, but to Negan, it added to your sex appeal.
"Goddamn, baby. You look fuckin' hot!" He said as he admired you. It was so sheer it barely left anything to the imagination and the lacy parts made you look angelic.
"Take a picture, it'll last longer," you teased with newfound confidence brought on by Negan's words. Then you remembered your digital camera. "Here." You tossed the camera to him. He caught it and smirked when he realized what it was. A lustful look washed over his eyes as he turned the device on.
"On your knees," he ordered using his leader voice. You quickly and eagerly obeyed him, which only made his dick harden in his pants. He walked over to you and grabbed you jaw in a large hand, tilting it up to look at him before snapping a picture.
"Just look at you. My pretty little doll." And that's exactly what you felt like. His pretty little doll. His to dress and pose and fuck however he wants. It made you wet, giving him full control over you like this.
"Take those panties off." Your body was hot with lust and shame as you slid the moistening garment off your body.
"Get on all fours." You did so and he manually readjusted you to how he wanted. Your ass in the air and back arched with your chin rested on your arms crossed beneath you. The skirt of the dress slid up your body, exposing you to the cool air of the room. Negan snapped a few pictures of your face before moving behind you. You squeaked in shock when you felt his finger slide up and down your slit.
"Damn. So wet and I barely touched you." The humiliation of him taking pictures of your bare pussy only made you wetter. You got on your knees again and turned to face Negan.
"Let's make a sex tape," you suggested as you fiddled with his belt. His signature grin blossomed on his face and he looked down at you with lust filled, hazel eyes.
"Fuck yeah!" He started recording once you got his belt off and pulled his pants and boxers down just enough to free his hard cock. It sprang up, hitting his abdomen and revealing veins you could only see when he was erect. You took him in your hands, licking the precum off his sensitive tip before taking it in your mouth. You swirled your tongue around it while slowly stroking the rest with your hands.
"Quit your goddamn teasing and suck my dick," he impatiently demanded. You looked up into the camera with mischief laden eyes as you took the rest of him into your warm mouth, earning a guttural moan from the man. Your pussy fluttered at the sound. Eager to hear it again, you stopped teasing and picked up the pace. But it must not have been enough since Negan grabbed into your hair and began fucking your face at his own rapid pace, ignoring the way you gagged around his large member and the tears streaming down your pretty face.
"That's it. Takin' me so good doll." Your cunt throbbed at the praise. He was getting close, you could tell by the way he twitched inside your mouth. He groaned as he emptied his white hot load down your throat.
"You did so good baby," he praised as he wiped the tears off your face with his thumb. He helped you up off the floor before pushing you onto his bed.
"Show me that pretty little cunt of yours." He spread open your legs and zoomed the camera in on your soaked pussy. Your inner thighs were coated with your arousal, as well. He delivered a rough slap to your pussy, forcing a moan out of you.
"You like it when I hit you, huh?" You could hear the smirk in his voice as he did it again.
"Please Negan! Need you so bad," you begged from beneath him. He ignored your pleas and directed the camera to your breasts, which were barely contained by the babydoll. He pulled them out with little effort. He gave you the camera to hold while he focused his attention to them.
"Such pretty tits," he complimented before nipping your nipple. You squealed in shock and pleasure. He had never done that before, but you liked it. With a flattened tongue, he licked the nipple he bit, soothing it before taking it into his mouth. The scratch of his beard felt so good on your sensitive, bare breasts. He rolled the nipple that wasn't in his mouth between his thumb and pointer finger, causing you to squirm.
"Need you inside," you slurred. Negan pulled away from you r breast with a pop and took the camera back from you.He zoomed in on his own hard-again dick as he lined it up with your sopping hole. You were so wet he slid in effortlessly. You moaned in ecstasy as he finally put out that fire that was burning in you. He didn't hesitate as he started thrusting into you at a merciless pace. The leader couldn't decide if he wanted to focus the camera on the way your cunt swallowed him hole, the outline of his dick protruding through your stomach, your tits as they bounced in unison with his rapid thrusts, or your eyes rolling back in the head of your fucked out face. He zoomed out, capturing the beauty of it all.
"Such a good little fucktoy for me," he admonished. His words brought you closer to the edge as your walls clamped down on his cock.
"Negan 'm gnna," your own moan cut off your nonsensical, fucked babbles.
"So drunk on my cock," he grunted as he filled you with his seed, not waiting for you to reach your own peak. But he didn't have to since you came right after, arching off the bed. He pulled out and zoomed the camera in on your abused cunt. His cum slowly leaked out of your hole and onto the dark bed spread. That was the perfect place to end the video, he decided.
"Hot damn. Were you a porn star before the world went to shit?"
...
not proofread, sorry! thanks for reading! <3
i uploaded this from my phone, so sorry if it's a bit of a mess.
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angelbambisworld · 3 months
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You can really tell that Gene put his whole Demonussy into this song.
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iamnotawomanimagod · 1 year
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Raphaniel episodes 1-3: I'm gonna get that cheese man if it's the last thing I do. That stinky piece of cheese is my number one nemesis. I will never ever trust this hard-dairy dastardly devil, until the very day the Bulb envelopes me in its light --
Raphaniel episode 4: Colin Provolone is the only reason I managed to put pants on today
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