#oh god and buck probably gets them too. and he and chris have the same exact collection of zoo shop stuffed animals so when

[kinardsboy]

This has been sitting on my mind a lot lately but it seems extra relevant now with the way Tommy and by extension Lou has been criticized for acting “too gay” in ep 5. And while yes, I will agree Tommy acted slightly different in ep 5, it has absolutely everything to do with Lou’s incredible acting choices to play Tommy differently when he is around people he deems as “safe” which is much better explained in this amazing post here <-

All these complains are doing is just yet again exposing buddies as homophobes who are, at the end of the day. Uncomfortable with real queerness being shown infront of them. Of course we already knew this with how they react to Buck and Tommy kissing and god forbid flirting especially if it has sexual implications like the daddy kink scene.

They can’t possibly fathom their precious uwu baby Buck would be sexual with another man so they spin and twist it however they can to make it out to be, “NO! You see! Tommy started the flirting! Tommy is just an insatiable horny gay man! He only wants sex! Like most of them do!”

Which is again spewing homophobic rhetoric, who wouldve guessed thats what they immediately turn to?

I now have something probably controversial to say but oh well, im going to say it anyway.

A good many of these shippers would be deeply uncomfortable with Buddie actually becoming canon, because they would be nothing like their fanfic. They don’t want to see two men in a relationship, they want to see Eddie in a relationship with the character they project themselves onto.

There are so many examples of this but perhaps the biggest being the way Buck is made out to be the “woman” in the relationship and especially how he is made to be the “mom”

Buck and Tommy’s relationship 1st does not have any children involved so there are no gendered roles to be assigned (even though if there was.. theyd just both be a dad), they are both beefy and the same height, which is what people usually use to decide “top” and “bottom” but again since there is little physical difference between them, they cannot do this, which only adds to their uncomfortableness.

Furthermore, I would go as far to say that Buddie shippers dont actually like Buck.

A while back a shipper posted this analysis of Buddie, that essentially reduces Buck to a dog. A pet. Only to be let out of the bedroom to cook and take care of Chris, otherwise he’s meant only for Eddie’s pleasure.

Which, disgusting. But the thing that stood out most to me was how Tommy was criticized for

letting Buck be himself. For accepting and loving him flaws and all. For not trying to change anything, or “train” the bad out of him

While Eddie was the “trainer” in that scenario, that had to train the bad out of Buck in order for him to be acceptable.

And thats the funny thing isnt it? Buddie shippers have to completely warp and destroy Buck’s character to make him fit their mold of perfect partner for Eddie. They make him out to be this helpless person who can’t even tell Tommy he doesnt want to be called Evan, that needs rescuing from Tommy, that is a “mother figure” to Chris, that his “dream role” would be live in chef and maid for the diaz family..

When none of that is Buck.

Buck is a smart, independent and strong man. He has worked tirelessly on himself to know who he is and what he wants, which right now? Is with Tommy.

Bringing it back to my main point, their complaints of Tommy being more gay and Bucktommy intimacy ultimately just boil down to homophobia plain and simple, seeing real queer representation and not representation that they can specifically twist and cater to themselves through fic, headcanons or gifs, makes them uncomfortable

(could this be why so many of them ignore shows with canon m/m ships for favor of shows with fanon ones that will never actually happen? So they can make these demands for representation then shit on it as soon as they get it because its not fanfic? Its not their fetish specifically catered to them? It actually represents real life queer men who they don’t actually like?)

[cal-daisies-and-briars]

Max of 🌲 please and thank you :)

Hell yeah!

1k for 🌲:

---

“Because what if that’s why he’s there?” Buck posits. 

This stops Eddie short. Cuts off his panicked assumptions.

“Wait, what?” He asks Buck. “He’s there because of me. Because I fucked up.”

“That’s why he called them,” Buck agrees. “I’m not trying to absolve you, Eddie. I’m just saying… What if she is a Huldra and she’s hypnotizing him?”

Eddie goes pale. “How could you say that? That’s horrible!”

He’s not very fond of his mother at the moment, but that is not what she is. 

“No!” Buck sputters. “No! Not that. God, Eddie. Fuck, that’s not what I mean. I just mean, what if she’s making him stay.”

Eddie frowns. “Making him stay in El Paso?”

Buck nods. “What if it’s just… Plain old hypnotism? He just does what she says?”

Eddie doesn’t… He doesn’t know. He doesn’t like blaming someone who isn’t himself. He doesn’t… Except… Wouldn’t that explain how he and Chris were having a good conversation until she came into that room. Wouldn’t it explain how Chris didn’t really know how long he’d been gone? 

Uh, my head feels a little funny. Five months is a really long time.

“Oh my god, Buck. What if that’s what’s happening?”

“Right? It makes sense. Chris would never just say that to you.”

No. He wouldn’t. Would he? Eddie doesn’t know for certain. He’s been latching onto the thought that he deserved all of it. Does he… Does he not? He’s still the reason Chris called. He still did what he did. 

“Why did she never hypnotize us, then? My sisters and I?” Eddie asks. 

“Do you know she didn’t?” Buck asks.

“I know about a million things I did against her express wishes, so yeah,” Eddie replies. 

“Maybe it doesn’t work on you, then?” Buck tries. “Because you’re the same?”

“Maybe,” Eddie sighs. 

“If we find Adriana, we’ll find out,” Buck says.

“True,” Eddie sighs. “Which would also then mean…”

“Christopher isn’t a Huldra, too,” Buck realizes.

“Yeah,” Eddie nods. “I guess we’ll find out.”

If this is true? If his mother is controlling Christopher like that? There will be hell to pay. 

🍂

They end up getting a motel outside Scottsdale. It’s nothing special. Side of the road. Kind of dingey. It hardly matters; they just need somewhere quick to rest their eyes until sunset. Buck is pretty tired. He’s been driving for a while. He’s looking forward to sleeping, even on a stiff, too-short mattress. But he finds sleeping a bit more challenging than expected. Namely, because of Eddie. 

They snuggle together like they have the past few nights. That’s not the problem. Buck loves sleeping like this. It makes him feel completely at ease. Eddie is with him. In his arms. Everything is as good as it can be in that moment, as long as Eddie is with him. 

But tonight, Eddie seems to want more than post-roadtrip sleep. Which is a little questionable considering they’re on their way to discover if his sister is a secret serial killer, and if his mom is hypnotizing his child into hating him, and on top of all that, they both kind of smell like they’ve been in a car all day. But there Eddie is, moving to kiss along Buck’s neck. With their bodies twisted together, Buck can feel Eddie’s hardening erection against his leg. Damn. 

“Eddie,” Buck whispers. “Is this a good time?”

Eddie freezes. He pulls his lips from Buck’s neck. 

“Uh, is it not?” Eddie asks. 

“I mean… There’s a lot going on and we drove all day.”

“Sorry,” Eddie says. “Yeah, you’re probably too tired. I’m sorry.”

Wait, now. No, no, no. 

“Don’t be sorry,” Buck insists. “I just… You know, want to make sure… Because it’s sort of been a lot of revelations, and…”

“And you always make me feel better,” Eddie says quietly. 

Oh. 

Right. 

“But I want you to… So, if you don’t want…” Eddie continues. “That’s obviously…”

The thing is, sometimes Buck isn’t sure. He doesn’t know if Eddie will want him when all this is over. If it’s ever over. They’ve got to find a way to reverse it. Or at least conceal it so Eddie can have a normal life. When that’s come to fruition, will he want to be with Buck? Will he go back to saying he’s straight? Sometimes Buck worries he does just make Eddie feel better. He knows Eddie loves him. But is it the same way Buck loves Eddie? That doesn’t seem likely. 

But Buck still wants him as much as he can have him. He still wants all of him. And there’s not any hypnosis accounting for that. 

“I always want you,” Buck says. A paraphrasing of something he said yesterday, too. He doesn’t know if he wants Eddie to know that he means that beyond just sexually. 

Eddie gives him a long, pensive look. Like he, too, is uncertain of something. Only, Buck can’t tell what. 

“Are you too tired?” Eddie asks finally.

“No,” Buck says. “Not for you.”

iii.

They manage quick, necessary showers before leaving the next morning. The sun is just rising. Sky red and bleary. Eddie can tell that Buck is pretty exhausted. He feels badly about that. Really, he does. It’s just… Despite everything going on, Eddie sort of wants to be doing stuff with Buck all the time now. A switch has flipped and he cannot unflip it. He’s horny, on top of monstrous. A winning combination. Lucky Buck. 

They don’t talk about it. Maybe because Buck is too tired. Or maybe because, for all their talking to each other, they never broach talking about each other. In that sort of way. And if there’s an uncomfortable topic to discuss, it’s usually Buck who forces the discussion. He hasn’t. So Eddie follows suit. 

The closer they get to Apache-Sitgreaves National Forest, the more Eddie starts to feel a certain kind of way. At first he blames it on nerves. Anticipation. Worry for Adriana.

[polyfirefly]

Valunerable

This is a scene that was originally in The Demi-Gods AU but I think would be kind of redundant given how late it took place in the plotline in my mind. So while there's specific context missing from when I first thought of it, it still works on its own in the regular 911 setting and I couldn't get it out of my head. Warning: This is a little sad and cheesey. Hella cheese.

The whole evening was a disaster. Eddie isn't sure why he'd thought it would be a good idea to invite his parents to dinner. Helena and Ramon just so happened to pick that weekend to come to town and make a suprise visit. The same weekend Eddie decided to make the move into Buck and Tommy's place. Their place.

Read on AO3

Chris, who didn't have any interest in helping them unpack anything that wasn't his PS5, was spending the night over at Hen and Karen's, hanging out with Denny.

When his parents had called and said they were 10 minutes outside of the city, Eddie had panicked. He'd looked over at his partners for support. Buck nodded assuredly and Tommy just frowned and shrugged at him.

An hour and a half later and Eddie is full of regret, lightly fuming, and embarrassed.

"I can't believe I said that. God."

Tommy chuckles from where he stands at the sink washing dishes.

"Oh, I don't know. I thought it was a creative way to tell your parents that you're a bottom. Not the way I would have done it, but still effective."

"Shut up!" Eddie's cheeks glow red-hot. "I just wanted to piss them off, and before I could even think about it the words were out of my mouth."

"Disappointed? About what? The fact that I'm queer, in a relationship with two men, or the fact that neither of them can put a baby in me and give you another grandchild?Believe me, he's been trying real hard!" he'd said, gesturing at Tommy.

His mom's face turned pale and the realization and shame at what he'd said sank in his stomach.

His parents left quickly after that.

"I would prefer to focus on what you said before that," said Buck. He's sitting at the table, finishing off the last of the bottle of red wine that had barely been touched the whole evening. "I think it was sweet. Don't you think so, Tommy?"

"There's nothing to think about. I love them. I love them both!"

"It was a very sweet thing to say," Tommy says.

"You know I meant it. I do love you," Eddie says.

Tommy makes a strange noise. There's an emotion behind it that Eddie can't place. Eddie looks at Buck who shakes his head and shrugs, also confused.

"You don't believe me, Tommy?" Tommy's posture is suddenly tense. He's turned away from the both of them, facing the sink and focused on the dishes.

"No, I believe you. I know you love Buck, and that you love spending time with me, too."  

There's something about the way he says it, 'love spending time with me.'  That sets off a warning bell in Eddie's head.

"Wait, what do you mean?" Eddie asks.

"Nothing. It's just what it is. You love Evan. I love Evan. Our relationship is special because we love the same, beautiful, sweet and amazingly annoying person." Eddie can hear the intended humor in it, an attempt to sweep past the moment. Eddie isn't going to let this go, because there's something there, something Tommy doesn't want him to notice. He looks over at Buck who looks just as alarmed as Eddie.

Buck stands up and walks over to the two of them.

"Tommy, you know Eddie loves you, too, right? We both love you." says Buck. Tommy finally turns around but his eyes don't meet either of their gazes. He's staring at the floor as he speaks.

"Look, you're both very sweet, but I know it's not possible for either of you to love me." He takes a deep breath before continuing, as if he'd just let go of something he'd been holding on to for a while. "Evan, you're the most selfless person I've ever met, and Eddie, you're probably the most loving parent I've ever seen. You're both too good to love someone like me."

'Someone like me'.

Eddie recognizes something in that moment and then realizes.

"Tommy, do you think you're a bad person?" Eddie asks. He reaches out and puts a hand on Tommy's arm. It's slight, but Tommy flinches at his touch.

"I think. I think I..." Tommy's voice is trimbling. He's looking up, finally, but his glossy eyes are darting around the room, looking for a way, a reason to escape.

Buck and Eddie are on either side of Tommy now. There is no running from this, not this time.

"Tommy, listen to me. You are not a bad person, and I love you. You , Tommy!" Eddie tells him, stern. Tommy's face starts to crack until tears start falling, and Buck and Eddie realize, this is the first time they've seen their Tommy cry.

Buck keeps the train going, letting Tommy know exactly who he really is, how he and Eddie see him.

You're incredibly brave, and strong, and I don't just mean here," Buck says, tapping Tommy's arm with a finger. "I mean here," and he pokes Tommy in the chest, over his heart.

Eddie takes his turn, gently taking Tommy's face in his hands.

"You've changed both Buck and I's lives in ways that make them infinity better than they could have ever been without you. There is no us without you. You have to know that. You're good. You are so good."

It's here that Tommy fully breaks and Eddie and Buck hold on to him together until the shaking stills and the tears stop coming. Eddie can see the embarrassment all over Tommy's face after everything, but he and Buck assure Tommy that he's safe. This is what they're there for, to take care of each other when they needed it.

Later, all three of them in bed, Eddie is somewhere between awake asleep, and Buck is curled up in-between them, sleeping soundly. Tommy stares at him through half lidded eyes. Tommy reaches out across the distance between them and his fingers caress Eddie's cheek with a familiar tenderness.

"What I said earlier," Tommy whispers so softly just enough to not wake Buck, but so that Eddie can hear him. "It sounded like I didn't love you, too, but I need you to know, that I do."

Eddie just smiles.

"I know," he says, before falling back to sleep.

[lovecolibri]

SaL anon here bestie and I have to say before anything, across multiple seasons of multiple shows, I've never been so close to calling Neptune on an episode as I was for 911 this Thursday. The fight scene?? Pure perfection, I could practically hear it in the background. There are two big things stopping me, first I'm kind of afraid at this point we'll get an even better reason to call it next episode. The setup is there, and a lot of signs are pointing that way. The second bigger reason is that, at the end of the day, the opposite of Neptune actually played out on our screens and I can't possibly regret that it did.

So I'll explain. Keeping in mind that Neptune's big theme is "I want to love you but I don't know how", this episode played heavily into the idea of "the family we chose" which is exactly what made it so good, 911 remembering its fucking roots. And obviously within the greater 118 family we have the little subfamilies, Henren, Athena and Bobby, Chim and Maddie (Chim and his guilt but Athena not having it is killing me 😭😭😭), and (whatever some people may like to deny) the Buckley-Diaz family. And at every point we saw the little hints of crossovers within those families (Athena talking with Karen and bringing up Chim, Eddie talking with Henren, etc.) but in it all Buck was kind of isolated, not by intent and probably more so by his own inadvertent design. Buck's family is the 118 and (with Eddie in Texas) when each of them retreat to their own little corners where does Buck have to go? He's trying to hold the line on their greater family but for a grief so intense its understandable for the others to keep it closer to home. And in his own way Eddie did too, hiding from Henren for sure and likely hiding from Chris. But when the cards are on the table (meaning the fight scene) Eddie knows Buck has felt alone in his grief, the same way he has. And to help he brings him a fucking family!! He brings Buck his son, his aunt (Tia Pepa you are the most patient of mortals for two idiots in love) and lets him know he does have a family beyond the 118, specifically Eddie's!! So yeah, its an entire contradiction of not knowing how to love someone because Eddie knew what Buck needed!! The only thing missing is that Eddie doesn't quite get that all of that begins and ends with him, Buck is part of Eddie's family because Eddie adopted him into it, and Eddie just needs a few more pushes to realize exactly why he did that. The episode was fantastic overall and my hope is that the show realizes people are watching for all the lovely, personal stories we got (still not happy about the Bobby of it all but I'm much more willing to see where it all leads to). Thank fucking god the show managed remember itself before the finale. Now why do I hope we'll still get a Neptune moment?? Because both these idiots have assumed they're operating under one set of relationship rules while actively operating under another. And I hope the finale blows that up in their faces and, at least a little, they fumble over what all that means.

Hello my friend! I had a bunch of family in town and therefore was not at home most of the weekend, but I wanted to get this done before the week starts and whatever craziness leading up to the finale gets underway.

Oh man, the Neptune vibes were so good and we can absolutely circle back if we get something delicious in the finale! (about time we got a good song moment! I swear I had West locked and loaded and waiting since mid-season when we knew Eddie might move and while I loved the domestic face-time calls all the time, I was hoping for at least some on-screen pining to give us a reason to do it! *shakes fist*) But you're so right that ultimately the premise of Neptune gets subverted because Eddie absolutely does know how to love Buck. And Buck absolutely does know how to love Eddie as we saw once Eddie was in Texas and Buck was giving him the support he needed.

But the fight scene?! Whoooo boy! In that moment they are so lost in their own grief that they DON'T know how to love each other because they have almost always taken turns having Something Going On, so the other was able to be there how they were needed. The times they were Going Through It at the same time? Well. That's when they fight. The grocery store. The fight as Eddie is trying to sublet. This kitchen scene. They are struggling to connect to be what the other needs because THEY are in need too. But what is so beautiful is that they are still each other's safe space! They allow themselves to break in front of each other in ways they would never be able to in front of someone else. And that moment of released pressure, and expressed grief and guilt that Eddie gets is exactly what he needed to clear his head and get Buck what he needed, which is his own family unit to go home to, like everyone else has.

This really was such a good episode and it felt more like the early season vibes than anything we've seen recently! I'm hoping Timmy boy and the network take some notes because even the GA was crawling out of the woodwork to make accounts so they could bitch about killing Bobby and how shit that choice was, and how the found family stories told through the little connecting emergencies is what endeared everyone and the reason so many watched. You would not believe the number of "if I wanted to watch Grey's Anatomy I would" comments I saw everywhere 🤣 I'm still holding out hope that Tim and a major network like ABC aren't SO fully incompetent that they would totally bungle a farewell tribute to a beloved main character that was one of the main draws to the show AND a well known actor, in the way that they so totally bungled 8x16. I have never seen such a united view of an episode since Ghost Stories, and even that had it's fair share of supporters. So I've gotta believe that Bobby is still alive and is going to come back to us at the end of 3 days episodes of mourning.

I was super checked out after Lab Rats and even more so after The Last Alarm, but damn did this episode draw me back in! It was a great reminder of what this show can do when it leans into it's strengths (and 8x16 was a reminder of what happens when KR is allowed in the room so if we're lucky maybe they FINALLY learned a fucking lesson for once), and lets it's actors have the scenes together to ACT. I mean, I am going to be living off that Buddie kitchen fight high for AGES, and Ryan's little head shakes trying to get himself together. I know those head shakes! I have done a lot of them since November when my brother passed and I was having a big feelings moment when I did not have the time and space to be having a big feelings moment. It was just SO raw, and real. I'm finding myself excited to see what the finale brings! If Bobby is actually gone, I will have to reassess some of my excitement for season 9, but again, it's just SUCH better tv for him to be alive! And I can't imagine the show not wanting to cash in on that!

I guess we shall see in a few days! Buckle up! If nothing else, that Ryliver press tour is gonna be something delicious to look forward to!

[playedwright]

"hold me like water- or christ, hold me like a knife." or "but I know being reckless and young is not how the damage gets done." for the unreal unearth prompts!

oh my god my literal favorite line from who we are... i had to do that one ofc.... (i couldn't find a way to have them say it word for word but it's similar and the prompt is more the overall vibe). also it got out of hand unsurprisingly <3 thank u for the prompt beloved!!!

Eddie’s been back in Los Angeles for two weeks when he wakes up with a start just after three in the morning. His phone screen is too bright in the dark when he checks the time, but there’s no notification waiting for him that might have woken him up. The street outside the window is quiet, darker than normal since one of the street lights went out and hasn’t been repaired by the city yet. Chris is still asleep, as far as Eddie can tell from his spot on the couch—the door to his room is still closed. And Buck is at work, still, for at least a few more hours.

A floorboard in the kitchen creaks.

Eddie glances outside. Buck’s truck is in the driveway.

He finds Buck sitting on the floor, leaning against kitchen cabinets with a bottle of beer in his hands. His eyes are closed, but his head tilts towards the doorway when Eddie walks in, so Buck knows he’s there.

“Bad shift,” he says. It isn’t a question—he’s home five hours early, sitting on the ground despite the fact there are chairs less than five feet away from him, and he’s got a drink in his hand. Even if Eddie didn’t know Buck intrinsically, down to his core, he’d know something was wrong.

“School bus crash,” Buck tells him. His voice is raw, tired. A little bit heartbroken. “High school baseball team on their way home from an away game.”

Eddie slowly takes a seat by his side. The bottle of beer is still unopened in Buck’s hands. “Casualties?”

Buck lets out a deep breath through his nostrils. His head thunks back against the cabinet door, and his eyes are still closed and Eddie’s starting to wonder if it’s because he’s trying not to cry. “Yeah,” he says, after a long while. The corner of his mouth lifts into a sad smile. “They’d won their game.”

“Jesus, Buck,” breathes Eddie. “Bobby let you go early?”

The dam breaks. Tears start to fall, and Buck drops the beer to cradle his head in his hands. “The last kid,” he says, muffled and crying, “he was pinned between seats. Femoral bleed. Before he lost consciousness, he told me that his parents were going to be disappointed in him. They’d won, I told him. He said it didn’t matter. He struck out at bat, more than once. The team won in spite of him, they’d say. He was dying, and all he cared about was the fact that his parents weren’t going to be proud of him.”

Eddie picks the discarded bottle up, stretching to place it on the counter out of the way. There’s more to the story, he knows. He’ll wait patiently, for Buck to finish, for Buck to be ready for him to say something. He always will.

“He reminded me of me,” Buck laughs. He raises his head from his hands, and his face is red and splotchy. Eddie can’t stop himself—he reaches up and wipes stray tears away. Buck’s returning smile is soft, still sad. “Isn’t that pathetic? There’s this kid, and he’s probably barely sixteen, and beneath piles of rubbage there’s an artery bleeding out slowly but it’s still killing him. He’s counting on me to save him. And… and all I can think of is that he is just like me at that age.

“I mean, how many times have I said that exact same thing?” When Buck laughs again, it’s more bitter this time. Eddie’s hand is still on his face. “Any good I did, it didn’t matter to my parents. Because all they could see when they looked at me was my failures.”

“Baby,” Eddie murmurs. He doesn’t mean to—it bursts out of him, because his love for Buck always has. It demands to be heard, to be seen. He can’t believe it took him so long to recognize it as love with how loud the feeling made itself. “Hey. C’mon. Let’s go lay down, okay?”

Buck leans his cheek against Eddie’s hand. This time when he smiles, it’s softer. He nods, and when Eddie stands up, he takes the offered hand and follows him to the bedroom.

They lay down on top of the covers, two parenthesis facing each other in the dark. Buck’s hand rests, palm up, between them. He lets out a sigh of relief when Eddie reaches between them and twines their fingers together.

“I know I’m not a failure,” Buck whispers. “What my parents did, how they made me feel… I know, it’s… We’ve moved past it. I know that I’m good, and that I–I do good things. I know. I love what I do. I love who I do it with. That’s what’s important, and… I know that. I just.”

“It’s okay,” Eddie murmurs. He squeezes Buck’s hand. “It’s okay.”

Buck’s eyes squeeze closed again. He’s beautiful, like this—bathed in moonlight, lashes fluttering against his skin. The slow rise and fall of his chest and shoulders as he breathes. The warmth of his hand, the calluses on his fingertips. It’s all beautiful. Eddie feels privileged to be able to witness it at all.

“I just wish someone else would know it, too,” Buck finally says.

Eddie frowns. “What do you mean?”

Buck bites his lip, and Eddie wants to press his fingers to the spot where his teeth dig into the pink flesh of his mouth. He wants. More than he’s ever wanted anything before.

“I wasn’t enough for my parents,” Buck murmurs. “And I haven’t been enough for any of my partners. Or, or I’ve been too much. People think I’m not serious enough, or I’m too serious too fast. Just once, I–I wish someone would think that I’m… I don’t know. Exactly enough, I guess. I want someone to hold me like, like I’m something they’re scared to lose. Or something that can hurt them, but that they trust enough not to.”

Eddie feels tears pricking at the corners of his eyes. He hadn’t realized—his entire soul feels like it’s screaming from the rooftops that he was created to love Evan Buckley, but it hasn’t been loud enough. Buck hasn’t heard him yet. He still—he still doubts that he’s worthy of love at all.

“Buck—” he tries.

Buck shakes his head. “It’s stupid,” he says, with a self-deprecating laugh. “I’m good. I know I’m good. I don’t—people don’t need people to say they’re good to know they’re good. I’m sorry, I don’t—”

Eddie presses his fingertips to Buck’s mouth to quiet him. “Evan Buckley,” he murmurs. Buck’s eyes go wide and beautiful. “Listen to me, and you listen well. You are exactly enough. You are brilliant, loving, and kind. There is so much goodness inside of you that you can’t even contain it all.”

“Eddie,” Buck starts, shaking his head, but Eddie won’t let him speak.

“Stop it. I told you to listen. You want to be enough for someone? You’re enough for me. You’re it for me. I can’t make it through this world without you. I tried, and it sucked, and I only got through it because I still had a portion of you. That’s what wasn’t enough. Part of you, half of you, anything except for all of you, that’s what isn’t enough. I need you, Buck, and I need all of you. And this? Right now? This is me holding you like I’m terrified I could lose you. This is me holding you and handing you my heart. And yeah, you could hurt me, but I know you won’t. And you want to know how I know that?”

Buck blinks back tears. The water clings to his lashes. Eddie’s chest aches and threatens to cave in under the weight of how much he loves Buck.

“Because I gave you my heart before,” he continues, before Buck even has a second to respond. “When I gave you my son. You did everything to protect him, and you did it. And then I gave it to you again—I put you in my will. I trust you, every day, with my son. How can you know that and not realize that I have been in love with you for all this time?”

“Eddie,” Buck gasps. His breath tickles Eddie’s fingertips, but a shiver runs down his spine when Buck presses a faint kiss to the skin there. He draws his hand away so that Buck can speak. “What—are you serious? You love me?”

“I do,” Eddie confirms, “more than I’ve ever loved anyone.”

Buck laughs a bit breathlessly. “My sister asked me if I was in love with you six weeks ago,” he admits, and Eddie feels the wind get knocked out of him. “And before that, Tommy accused me of the same thing. I thought they were crazy. I thought—I thought everyone felt like this. I mean, you’re my best friend. I’d do anything for you. I can’t imagine my life without you. I… I just thought that was normal.

“But then I kept thinking about it,” Buck whispers. Eddie can’t stop smiling. “And I thought about how much it sucked when you left. That was heartbreak. I thought about how upset I was when you let Marisol move in. That was jealousy. And then I thought about how much tonight sucked, and how badly I just wanted to shut the world out, before I realized that when I came home that you would be here. That we could be together. And I felt better, because you make everything better. That? That’s love. I love you, Eddie. I have, I think, for a long time.”

Eddie traces his fingers along Buck’s face. The bridge of his nose, the curve of his mouth, the line of his cheekbone. He does this until Buck’s eyelids flutter closed, and then he rests his palm against Buck’s cheek. “That’s good,” he says. “Because I definitely have loved you for a long time.”

There’s hardly any space between them, but Buck closes the short distance and presses his mouth to Eddie’s softly. Outside, the broken streetlight flickers, and down the hall Eddie’s son sleeps soundly in his room—in their home, that always belonged to all of them even when they lived apart. It’s a first kiss, and in it Eddie can taste forever. There used to be a time that such a concept frightened him. Forever would send him running for the hills. But not with Buck. With Buck, the idea enthralls him. He can’t wait for their forever to start.

“I love you,” Eddie repeats, against Buck’s lips, helpless to do anything but say it over and over again. He wants to paint it on the walls so that Buck never forgets it. He wants to spend every day of his life holding Buck tight, the way he wants—the way he deserves—and proving to Buck just how worthy he is of that love. “Jesus, baby, I mean, you’re it for me. I love you a forever type of way.”

Buck laughs, and they’re pressed so closely together that Eddie can practically taste it. “You’re not scared? What ever happened to not wanting a ready-made family?”

Eddie scowls, and in one swift move he shifts so he can roll Buck onto his back and settle on top of him. “You’ve been my family for years,” he growls, and Buck’s face goes slack in surprise. “I didn’t want that family because I already had this one. I just—I didn’t realize it. But c’mon, Buck, you’re in my will. I brought you into this family years ago, baby.”

“Such intricate ways of flirting,” Buck says breathlessly, and Eddie thinks that Buck means it to come out more teasing but instead it lands full of sweetness and awe. Long gone is the Buck from half an hour ago that thought no one would ever find him good enough. Eddie won’t ever let that Buck have a place in this household again. “You could have just kissed me then and saved us both a lot of heartbreak.”

“I wish I had,” Eddie admits. “I wish I’d realized I wanted to. We could have had years of this by now.”

“We have years,” Buck promises, and he reaches up to cradle Eddie’s face in his hands. He holds it with the same gentleness that he handles Eddie’s heart, and Eddie loves him. He loves him and loves him and loves him. “The future is ours, Eddie. And we’ve got plenty of years ahead of us.”

And as if Eddie wasn’t already gone on him, hook, line, and sinker, this would have sealed the deal. He’s helpless to do anything except kiss Buck again and again. 

now on ao3

[fand0mfancies]

SalEddie someone to share their suffering with, please!

Prompts here: Comfort my Characters

9-1-1, Eddie Diaz/Sal Deluca (ft. Evan 'Buck' Buckley/Tommy Kinard)

🙃 - Someone to share their suffering with

"The house is so empty," Eddie complained.

Sal sighed as he flopped down beside him. "Is it too late to make them come back?"

"They are both still in the state, hell Chris didn't even leave the city, you'll literally see them every weekend," Buck teased.

"Wait until your kids abandon you for university," Sal grumbled sourly. "God, why did we let them grow up?"

"Because it's physically impossible?" Tommy suggested wryly.

"You'll know our pain someday," Eddie said. "And I'm going to mock you so hard."

"Well until then... we'll leave you to your shared suffering. Maddie has the kids and I said we would pick them up by dinner," Buck said.

A few minutes later, still flopped together on the couch, Eddie turned and curled closer, his head dropping onto Sal's shoulder.

"I can't believe I already miss them," he said.

"Me too," Sal said. "I remember thinking how great it was that our kids were the same age. That they'd have things in common. Never thought about them both flying the nest at the same time."

"At least we still have each other," Eddie said.

"And there are benefits to a kid free house," Sal told him, tangling their fingers together on his lap.

"Absolutely," Eddie agreed. "Benefits."

"Wanna call them?" Sal asked.

"Oh god yeah," Eddie said, reaching for his phone immediately, before stopping himself. "No. We can't. They'll kill us."

Sal grumbled. "Yeah, probably."

"Wanna eat ice cream and watch trashy tv?" Eddie suggested. "I'm behind on my telenovela's."

Sal nodded. "I'll get the ice cream."

[prosperdemeter2]

Teaser Tuesday - watermark

“He shouldn’t have to be away from home.”

“Bobby said -.” 

“I’m not having you go out there by yourself either, Evan. Stop suggesting it.” 

He’d stop. Buck chewed on the inside of his lip and scuffed his toe over the carpet. Bobby had told them all the same thing - if it was too much, if they needed to step aside to take care of their families during this time, they would be allotted to. He couldn’t guarantee them that they’d have a job by the end of it, but he’d put in a word with the chief to at least let them keep their credentials. No one had taken him up on it. They all knew what they had signed up for when they had gotten that shield pinned to their chest. “I don’t know what to say here, Eddie.” Buck admitted after a moment, dragging his fingers through his hair so tightly that they got caught on a curl and tugged at it against his scalp. “I-I don’t… I don’t want him to go either.” 

“We just got him to believe that he’s not going to have to give any of this up.” Eddie leaned back on his hands and blinked wet eyes up at the glow-in-the-dark stars he had helped Chris put up when they had first moved in. They were in no particular pattern, but Chris told Buck that he had asked Eddie to put them up to resemble how they had looked in Afghanistan when they lived in Texas. That way, we’re always looking at the same night sky. Buck was pretty sure Eddie didn’t know that he knew about that. That he knew that Eddie had probably, at least subconsciously, tried to mimic that same pattern in LA. “And now…”

“He’s not giving any of it up.” Buck argued weakly. “He’s just… staying with Maddie. She’s great with kids. I mean… she didn’t do that bad of a job with me.”

“You didn’t do a bad job with you.” Eddie corrected and then sighed, dropping to lay down completely. “I’m sorry, Evan, this… isn’t your fault.”

“It’s not anyone’s fault.” 

“You’re just trying to help.” 

“You’re packing up Christopher’s shit to say goodbye to him for… god knows how long.” Buck shook his head. “Eddie, you’re allowed to be upset about it.” 

“So are you.” Eddie mumbled. 

“Yeah, well,” Buck shrugged. “I figured we’d take it turns.” 

Despite himself - and Buck knew it was despite himself because Eddie only closed his eyes and shook his head like that when he didn’t want to give into it - he smiled, small and shaky but there all the same. “Oh, we’d take it in turns?”

“We can’t both be miserable.” Buck responded dryly. “How would we get anything done?” Pointedly, he picked up where Eddie had left off with Christopher’s clothes. Arranged them in four neat, colorized piles that Eddie had nearly toppled over, and placed them in uniform formation in Christopher’s luggage. “Besides, this is practice for her. Maddie hasn’t watched a kid alone for more than a few hours since I was a kid, and Christopher is not me.” 

“I bet you were a troublemaker.” 

“I was the epitome of angelic.” He said, tossing a cheeky wink through his eyelashes. 

“You haven’t been angelic a day in your life.” 

“That’s not what you were saying last night.” 

“Nothing about that was angelic.”

[moonstonediaz]

no wait buck takes chris to the zoo all the time. ok? he does it all the time he practically has the place memorized, thats how much they’ve been. i need a moment ok i’m just—

[drmellking]

can this be a real thing, can it?

buck, eddie and chris go to a baseball game. it doesn't go as planned... it goes so much better. | 695 words.

Baseball is Eddie's favorite sport. He used to play back in highschool, it was one of the things Eddie truly enjoyed where he didn't care about his parents expectations or anything else.

He's never been to a big game, though. Of course he dad wouldn't waste money on that and then Eddie was in the army, and then he was coming home with his bullet wounds now etched into his body, Shannon left— a lot of things happened. Getting tickets for a baseball game never even crossed his mind.

But one day Buck comes into the Diaz house, screaming and cheering like Christmas morning came early. Buck bought tickets for a baseball game, just because knows Eddie likes it and— well, how is Eddie supposed to be normal about that? How is Eddie supposed to just not fall even more in love with the adorable, charming idiot?

And then they're at the game, Buck has this happy little smile on his face and his stupid backwards baseball cap. And he's leaning down to a side, so he can explain to Chris every little detail about the game and the players.

It's so— Eddie can't be normal about it, okay? It's too domestic and too close to what he wants foe him to be normal about it.

"Wow." Chris says, eyes following the ball. Eddie likes that his son gets to have this experience, that they're at a baseball game together.

Like a family. His brain unhelpfully supplies.

"Did you know there's a baseball player who only had one arm?" Buck says and Chris immediately starts asking questions. Eddie already knows all of this but he doesn't mind hearing the story of Jim Abbot again. He'd hear it a thousand times, he'd hear it for the rest of his life if it meant hearing Buck's voice.

Eddie just basks in the moment, happy to seat back and watch the game as two of his favorite people talk about anything and everything.

They're like a family. It's so domestic and perfect that he aches with how much he wants this to be real.

Eddie is a little distracted by how good Buck looks and how good he is with Chris. If he's being honest, he's barely watching the game— which he'll probably regret later. And he is brought by reality when the ball nearly hits him in the face, Buck's hand coming out of nowhere and catching it just before it hits Eddie.

The crowd around him goes wild and Chris is yelling the loudest, while Buck blinks and slowly a smile breaks, showing his dimples.

"Oh, God."

Buck lifts Chris up, giving him the ball and it's— Eddie looks around and realizes everyone think they're a family. They think—

"Dad, look!"

Everyone thinks they're a family and now they're faces are on the kiss cam. Everyone cheering for Buck and Eddie to kiss, because they think they're in love.

They think they're a couple.

Eddie hearts beat rapidly in his chest and he turns to look at Buck next to him.

The blonde has blushes cheeks and his lips are parted, wide blue eyes looking at Eddie with fear and hope— or is that wishful thinking?

Maybe it's the adrenaline suddenly rushing through his veins, maybe it's the thousands of strangers cheering him on, maybe it's the love and hope that he's sure he sees in Buck's eyes. Maybe it's a combination of all those things, but Eddie leans in and softly kiss the corner of Buck's lips.

It barely counts as a kiss, it's chaste and short. But it's enough.

"Later." He whispers low enough just for Buck to hear him.

Later they'll talk, once they're alone and Christopher isn't in the middle. Once they're in the privacy of their home and the warmth glow of the kitchen shines a light over them. Later Eddie will lean in and kiss Buck for real, press him against the kitchen counter and murmur all of his feelings into Buck's lips.

Later, they'll get their moment.

"Yeah, later." Buck answers back and then they're back to focusing on the game, matching soft and hopeful smiles adorning their faces. They're on the same page.

[hmslusitania]

Paint it Black

@evanbucxley @arrenemris you guys wanted petty, jealous Eddie stuck in an elevator with Taylor during the blackout, right?

Eddie Diaz has been involved in his share of awkward dinners.

This one takes the cake though. It starts with him showing up at Buck’s loft by himself, and Buck opening the door with that stupid puppy-dog confused tilt to his head that makes Eddie want to do something drastic.

“Where’s Ana?” he asks.

“We broke up,” Eddie says. “Figured it would be weird to invite her to dinner after that.”

“Oh, I didn’t know,” Buck says, which yeah, Eddie knows because Eddie hadn’t told him yet. “I’m sorry, man.”

Which makes…one of them.

The night gets worse when Taylor shows up with her latest story of her investigation into – Eddie misses the details, but he’s discovered that Taylor’s voice somehow is at the exact right pitch that he can’t quite hear it most of the time. Weird how that works.

Buck, bless his fucking heart, feels none of the tension in the loft. Or if he does, he doesn’t react to it. He stays chipper and upbeat and positive and doesn’t comment when Eddie and Taylor trip over each other to help him with making dinner or pouring drinks or to sit beside him on the couch while the food cooks.

But, like, the spot on the couch beside Buck is Eddie’s spot, and if it’s not Eddie’s it’s Christopher’s.

And Eddie…loses the fight.

Taylor’s tiny, and for just half a second, he entertains the utterly absurd idea of just picking her up and moving her, but it flits out of his head almost as soon as it arrives. It’s quickly followed by an unfortunate realisation that it must be easy as anything for Buck to just pick her up and move her when – which is then immediately erased by the second-hand memory he acquired from Captain Mehta that Buck had been able to just pick Eddie up and toss him into the engine like he was a sack of potatoes – which –

He’s saved when dinner is ready, but he feels Taylor’s eyes on him the whole way through the meal.

Annoyingly, they end up leaving at the same time. Buck and Eddie have a shift in the morning, and Taylor has a story to cut before some deadline or other. Eddie would rather not walk out with her, would rather not share the elevator with her – he briefly considers legging it for the stairs but they’re at the other end of Buck’s floor and the elevator is right there and it would be absolutely blatant what he was doing – but if the alternative is knowing she’s staying the night at Buck’s, he’ll deal with the elevator.

They’re both quiet while the doors slide open, the soft whisper of the brushed stainless-steel brushing against the dust guards the only sound besides the simmering mutual animosity between them. They step into the elevator, which smells vaguely of Pinesol, and Taylor presses the button for the ground floor with a shiny lacquered red nail.

The doors close again and the shimmering, irritable silence fills the space. No elevator music in Buck’s building, which is probably for the best.

“So,” Taylor says as the world’s slowest elevator descends. “Is it personal or are you just jealous?”

“I have no idea what you’re talking about,” Eddie says. The elevator has faux wood panelling, not mirrors, so he can’t tell if she’s looking at him or if she’s staring straight ahead like he is.

“You either hate me on a personal level, because I’m me or something,” she says. “Or you hate me because you’re in love with Buck.”

Eddie gets as far as a spluttered, indignant, “I am not in love with—”

And then the elevator lurches. Stops. The lights flicker and then die. The emergency lights do not kick on.

“Well that’s comforting,” Taylor says, dry.

Eddie pulls out his phone. Usually, it’s still connected to Buck’s wifi by the elevator, and the connection’s gone. So it isn’t just the elevator.

“There’s a button in here that calls the fire department, right?” Taylor asks, pulling out her own phone and shining it at the elevator panel. She presses the button that should connect them directly to the department, and nothing happens.

“Depending on how wide the power outage is, it might have knocked out dispatch,” Eddie says.

“Great,” Taylor says. “You’re a firefighter, you can get the doors open, right?”

“With a Halligan and a fully functional shoulder?” Eddie asks. “Sure.”

She huffs. “Do you think it’s just this building or wider?”

“How would I know?” Eddie asks.

“So helpful, thank you.”

“What do you want me to do, Taylor? Use my magical powers of divination to figure out if we’re in a building-wide, block-wide, city-wide, county-wide blackout?” Eddie snaps.

He can’t see her face in the shitty half-light of their respective phone screens, but he hears her roll her eyes.

“It’s because you’re in love with him, right?” she asks.

“For fuck’s sake, Taylor, I’m not in love with—”

“Because he’s in love with you,” she interrupts as though he hasn’t spoken. Eddie’s heart stops. “It’s weird, I’ve never really had to vie for someone’s affections before. I can’t say I’m a fan, but, see, he thinks you aren’t an option.”

“He told you this?” Eddie asks and hopes to God his voice sounds normal because it does not feel like it.

Taylor snorts. “He didn’t have to. Do you guys have any idea what you’re like when you’re around each other? It’s obvious to anyone who even meets you in passing, and I know both of you and have a journalism degree. It’s not difficult math.”

“Then why are you dating him?” Eddie asks, swallowing back the lump that’s just jumped into his throat that feels suspiciously like his heart.

“Because I like him,” Taylor says. “And because I like a challenge.”

Before Eddie can say anything rude about Buck being worth more than a challenge to someone, she sighs.

“I’d say you’re going to have to fight me for him, but it’s not going to be much of a competition,” she says.

“You really think my chances are that bad?” Eddie asks and he hates how sad he sounds, even to his own ears.

Taylor doesn’t get a chance to answer before Eddie’s phone lights up with a picture of Buck and Chris together and Buck’s name in bright letters. In the sudden illumination, he sees the annoyed, resigned expression on her face.

“That answer your question?” she replies, and Eddie answers the phone.

“Hey, did you make it out or are you stuck in the elevator?” Buck asks.

“We’re stuck in the elevator,” Eddie says. “No idea what floor. Maybe three?”

“Cool, don’t go anywhere,” Buck replies and hangs up before Eddie can ask where, exactly, they might go.

An awkward silence hangs in the elevator in the wake of the phone call.

Until, finally, Taylor says, “For what it’s worth, if I had to lose to someone, at least you’re as pretty as I am.”

Eddie is still searching for some kind of response to that – coming up absolutely blank – when the elevator doors slide open. Buck, illuminated by a headlamp, waves at them and pockets his keys.

“You have an elevator key?” Taylor asks while Buck pulls her out.

“Fire marshals and captains get ’em,” Buck says. “They’re standard across production lines.”

“Fire marshals have to give them back,” Eddie points out.

“Eh, when I was a probie, we got an elevator rescue and Bobby told me to go open the doors, and so I stood there trying to pry them open for like five minutes before he walked up to the elevator panel and unlocked them with his key,” Buck says. “Chim and Hen laughed at me for about a month every time we got near an elevator. So when I did my turn as fire marshal, I may have made a copy.”

“Of course you did,” Eddie says. He rolls his eyes and is grateful for the darkness so Buck can’t see exactly how fond he must look.

Taylor catches him, though, and for a tense second, Eddie thinks she’s going to say something about it. But Taylor Kelly is a lot of things, but “quitter” isn’t one of them. It might not be a fair fight, and the outcome might be rigged in Eddie’s favour, but he understands then that she’s going to make him fight for it. Fight for Buck.

No worthier fight, really.

“We should check in, see if they want us on shift early,” Buck says, already pulling his phone out to text or call Bobby.

“And I should go investigate,” Taylor says. “I’m sure my station is missing me.”

“Okay,” Buck says. “Do you want my headlamp for the stairs?”

“I’ve got it, but, thank you,” Taylor says. She stretches on her toes to kiss him goodbye – much more thoroughly than she had when they left Buck’s apartment. She arches an eyebrow at Eddie once she’s let go of Buck and Eddie narrows his eyes right back. “See you boys later.”

She flips on the flashlight on her phone and waltzes off to the stairs.

“We should tell all my neighbours to stay inside,” Buck says.

“Sounds like a plan,” Eddie says, shooting a text to his abuela and Chris to ask them to do the same. He doesn’t know yet if the blackout’s reached their neighbourhood, but it’s a better policy.

“So what did you and Taylor talk about while you were in the elevator together?” Buck asks in between knocking on his neighbours’ doors to announce LAFD please remain inside your homes.

“We, uh, came to an understanding,” Eddie says.

“Oh! Good,” Buck says. He pauses. “What about?”

“Don’t worry about it,” Eddie recommends. He nudges Buck with his shoulder and gets a grin in response. “Let’s check in with Bobby and see if they need us or if they recommend we just stay inside and stay safe, too.”

“No one I’d rather weather a lockdown with,” Buck replies, as if the second she stepped into the stairwell, Taylor also disappeared from his head. “Well, except maybe Christopher.”

Eddie laughs, and thinks in Taylor’s direction, may the best person win.

[cal-daisies-and-briars]

🔼🔼🔼🔼🔼🔼🔼🔼🔼🔼🔼🔼🔼🔼🔼🔼🔼🔼🔼🔼🔼🔼🔼🔼🔼🔼🔼🔼🔼

I need mooooore please 🫶🏻

87 for 🔼:

---

“Oh my god,” Eddie faux-groans. “How many times do I have to tell you I’m crazy about you for you to believe me?”

“Maybe one more time.” 

Eddie rolls his eyes. “I love you. I’m crazy about you. I want you in every aspect of my life. You’re my family, Buck. Satisfied?”

“Yeah, I… Well, I feel the same way. Uh, about all of it.” 

“So come over today,” Eddie says. “We can all figure this out. Together.”

“Okay,” he says. “What time?” 

Eddie feels giddy.

🔼 

Buck feels incredibly awkward driving to Eddie’s. Shannon and Eddie’s. Shannon and Eddie’s? He doesn’t know how to think of it. Christopher and Jane’s. How about that? 

Okay, he’s spiraling. He knows he’s spiraling. But he’s nervous. There are a lot of stakes here, right? His relationship with Eddie. His relationship with Shannon. His relationship with both those kids, who he loves so damn much. And then, Eddie and Shannon’s relationship, too. He doesn’t want to be the reason that gets messed up. That would devastate him. So this has to go well. It can’t not go well. 

On top of that, Chim is still… Being weird. And it’s making Buck feel a little unmoored. He’s asking like nothing is off or weird. Their conversation last night never happened. He just lives with Buck now. Which… Buck remembers being kicked out of his place and sent to sleep on an air mattress in Maddie’s dining room. So, it’s not like they’re exactly well suited to being roommates. Maybe if neither of them had partners it would be fine. But Buck really wants the place to himself. For reasons. Even more pressing, he really thinks Maddie needs Chim back. So that’s on his mind. He doesn’t really know how any future arrangements are going to go, for himself or his sister. 

Buck parks behind Eddie and sits for probably forty seconds.. He feels like he’s going to puke. They’re going to say one thing to him about a… A throuple, and he’s going to be so anxious he pukes. It’ll be gross. It’ll be embarrassing. They’ll change their minds about him. 

A text chimes on Buck’s phone. It’s from Eddie.

What are you doing? Come inside. 

Right. Okay. 

Buck gets out of the Jeep and walks up the front stoop. He hardly has time to open the front door and step fully inside before Chris is hugging him.

“BUCK!” He whoops. “You’re here! You’re really here!”

Buck hugs him back, momentarily relieved from his anxiety. 

“Yeah, bud. I’m here. I missed you so much.”

“I missed you too!” Chris says. “Can we play Minecraft later?”

“Oh, that’s up to your parents,” Buck says. “But I’d be down for it.”

“Yes!” Chris cheers. “Told you he’d want to, Dad.”

[matan4il]

I'm probably the only one who would be excited to see Eddie sussing Lucy out. I feel like the Fandom will freak thinking they are hooking up but I think it's totally in line with Eddie ans Buck.

Twice in real time I thought the show was gonna throw me into a love triangle with Eddie Buck and a female (Taylor or Marjan). Honest to God early on my greatest fear was them fighting over a girl.

But then it was clear Eddie did not like Taylor. And with Marjan yes he was "flirting" but it was clear Buck was the root of it. He was sort of feeling her out. Plus it's funny that they have Buck getting his feelings hurt when Eddie ditches him and Eddie gives him that shoulder shrug smirk. Clearly screaming at him you brought this on yourself by showing interest.

Compare that to when Eddie gets his feelings hurt Buck choose Taylor for the treasure hunt and Buck folds right away because he can't hurt Eddie's feelings lol.

I just can totally picture some misunderstandings of him trying to figure out if Lucy is single and interested in Buck and everyone else misreading the situation. And listen I am here for petty jealous Eddie so give it to me. They are both single again and I can see Eddie wanting to keep it that way till he figures out all the things you know.

Hi Nonnie!

Thank you for the ask! IDK if you’ve looked at my meta posts where I talked about Eddie and Marjan, but I very much said the same thing you do. That he was basically jealous she was someone Buck was so taken by, and he essentially entered Owen’s tent to try and team up with her, a kind of passive aggressive cockblocking move towards Buck, and a way to suss out the competition. By the end of Eddie’s time with her, they looked at the adaptive skateboard Buck helped him build, a remind of the little Buckley-Diaz family unit they built together, plus Hen going missing, and Buck being his lovable dumbass daredevil self, all of these together reminded Eddie he has nothing to be threatened by, that Buck would always put his family first and no one is more his family than Eddie and Chris, so suddenly there was room for charitably asking Marjan to throw Buck a bone and follow him back.

You know what I wish we got to see? Buck’s reaction as he excitedly told Eddie that Marjan followed him back... and then suddenly being hit with a realization, looking at his best friend, and asking, “Did you make this happen?” And Eddie would just shrug it off and avoid answering the question, which would make it clearer to Buck that yep, he did. Just imagine the Buckly heart eyes that Eddie wouldn’t even notice are turned towards him at that moment! :D

And yeeeeeees. I am here for petty jealous Eddie, too! I would be SO here for him finally realizing WHY he keeps getting jealous over other women stealing Buck’s attention away. Oh man, that would be pure Buddie gold. And also for all of the misunderstandings! But most of all, I just wanna see these bozos stop being so oblivious. Seriously, I don’t even need to see them kissing (though they def should), I just wanna see what they look like with their heads outside of the ground, because they finally stop burying them there to avoid their true feelings for each other. You think they’re handsome now, just think how gorgeous they would look when they give each other the heart eyes FULLY AWARE of what they’re doing... Our TVs would explode!

Sorry for the long ramble, but thank you for sharing your thoughts, lovely! xoxox

(If you're looking for my ask replies, here is my ask tag! xoxox)

[littlespoonevan]

can you please talk more about why the punching bag scene is the most important? i’m curious!

cAN I?!?!?

oh wow okay let me try and be coherent about this. and apologies in advance if i'm really not asjdfa

the punching bag scene is probably my favourite buddie scene out of all 4 seasons excluding everything in 4x13 and 4x14. it means everything to me and i truly do not understand why it's not discussed more often.

firstly, i think it’s the first time we really ever see buck confide in eddie? they’re best friends, we know they’re each other’s confidants and we’ve seen eddie vent to buck before (about shannon, about the chris skateboard fiasco) but i can’t recall any other scene where buck is the one opening up??? which is actually sort of funny when you think about how we always say buck is the more emotional of the two. and i’m sure buck has confided in eddie plenty of times off screen but this is the first time we actually get to see it properly.

but yeah, they’re at the punching bags and they’re alone and it’s easy to assume that eddie’s pulled buck aside for a workout because he can tell buck is frustrated. and just. not only is it the first time we ever see buck confide in eddie but it’s also the first time we ever see him angry????? we’ve seen him be betrayed and upset and act out but even in the lawsuit arc he was never angry like he is in that scene and there’s something about the fact that he trusts eddie with that anger??? and that eddie is so calm in the face of it all. he’s there to listen and to steady buck, that’s all

(also the physical image of that too when buck kicks the punching bag and eddie’s foot holding it down is the thing that keeps it from moving rip)

and then buck is talking about how he has to go back and apologise now - everything about eddie’s response is perfect. “why do you have to apologise? did you say anything that wasn’t true? if that’s how you feel - how they made you feel - then you have every right to say so.” the way he so completely validates buck’s feelings just means so much???? especially bc i think buck has a hard time discerning if he’s overreacting or not (probably even more so after the lawsuit) but here eddie is saying, no it’s okay you’re allowed to feel like this and you weren’t wrong to confront them

(i could go on about the parallels between the buckley and the diaz parents but that could be a whole other post but i think both of their upbringings helps them understand each other a lot better)

and thEN the moment where buck says he just wants to hit things and eddie blocks the punching bag and says, “i’ve been down that road. i don’t recommend it.” akjdfha god!!!!!! the way he can see his own self-destructive tendencies in buck and refuses to let him feel the same way. the way he spends the next ep and a half quietly watching buck and validating him and reminding him he’s allowed to give himself time to process everything is so fucking good.

ultimately i think it’s a scene that shows us So Much of where their friendship is now and how they always know how to be what the other person needs when they need it. it’s perfect <3333

[hotshotsxyz]

like it means something

buddie (2.8k) (read it on ao3)

Evan. His own name won’t stop rattling around in his head. Evan.

He brings Eddie home from the hospital and everything’s - not okay, Eddie still got hurt and Buck still had to watch it and Bobby’s still hurt too, but - they’re getting there. No one died, and that’s a hell of a lot better than it could’ve been. No one died.

Evan.

Eddie kisses Chris’s forehead and Buck grins wide, because yeah, of course he would take care of him if the worst happened, but this is what Christopher deserves. His family, alive and whole and well.

Taylor’s there. Of course she is, Buck’s mind supplies, you asked her to be. She’s your friend. More than a friend? Buck doesn’t know. There’s a lot to unpack there, and with everything else that’s happened, they haven’t had the time. It’s a conversation for another day.

Abuela, Pepa and Carla each take their turn fussing over Eddie and then, to Buck’s surprise, him too. He doesn’t understand why. Eddie got shot, not him. Eddie’s the one who hasn’t been home in a week, not him. Eddie -

Evan.

Buck’s at a loss. It’s a party of sorts, but Eddie’s exhausted and so is he. Buck feels completely wrung out, and he can see the tension in Eddie’s expression that says he does too. He wants to tell everyone else to leave, but it isn’t his place. Still, though, Taylor seems to get the hint first. She pulls him aside with a gentle hand to his shoulder.

“I’m going to head out. Is there anything you need?” she asks.

Buck shakes his head mutely.

“Just... get some rest, okay? I know you want to take care of him, but you’re not the only one who can.” She presses a soft kiss to the corner of his mouth, then heads over to where Eddie and Ana are seated at the dining room table to make her excuses.

Taylor is half right and half wrong. There are other people that can take care of Eddie, but Buck won’t be able to rest unless he’s nearby.

Evan.

Abuela and Pepa leave next, citing the sinking sun and the growing weariness in Eddie’s movements. They each kiss him on the cheek and go with the promise to return in the morning. Abuela’s left behind enough food to feed an army for a week, stacked in the fridge in carefully labeled Tupperware.

Then Carla goes and it’s just Eddie, Ana, Buck and Chris.

Evan.

Buck should probably go, he knows, but he can’t quite bring himself to. He knows Eddie’s okay, has the living proof sitting right in front of him, but the second he looks away all the tension of the week returns, the fear and anxiety mixing sickeningly in his stomach.

Christopher has fallen asleep in Eddie’s lap, head tucked into his good shoulder. Eddie himself is fighting yawns. It’s been a long day.

Finally, it’s Ana who breaks the silence, standing and pressing a kiss to Eddie’s forehead. “Get some rest,” she says. “And text me if you need anything.”

It’s virtually the same thing Taylor said to him, and it strikes Buck as odd. They’ve been together, what, six months now? She should be saying more. Maybe she’s not because he’s here. Buck still can’t bring himself to leave.

Evan.

Neither of them has moved in the minutes since Ana left, but Eddie’s eyes are starting to drift and Buck knows he needs to sleep.

“Let me take Chris,” he says softly.

The grateful nod Eddie gives him is a testament to just how tired he really is.

Buck picks him up carefully and carries him to bed. He tucks him in and presses a kiss into his forehead. Once upon a time, he might’ve wondered if that was his place. Not now, though, not after everything Eddie said. He loves this kid like his own; he’s not going to pretend it’s anything less.

Evan.

He flicks the light out and makes sure Chris’s night light is on before gently shutting the door. Wordlessly, he returns to Eddie’s side.

There’s a grimace of pain on Eddie’s face that hadn’t been there before, and a quick glance at the clock tells Buck that he’s way past due for another round of medication. He grabs the pills and a bottle of water from the kitchen.

“The doctor said I can give you ibuprofen, too, if this isn’t enough.”

Eddie shakes his head minutely. “No, this is okay.” He swallows the pills Buck offers him dry, then washes them down with a swig of water.

“You need to sleep,” Buck says. “I should-“

“Stay, please?” Eddie interrupts him.

And how could Buck say no to that?

Evan.

Buck’s barely asleep when he hears Eddie cry out. He’s on his feet in a second and by Eddie’s side in less.

Eddie’s asleep still, but his face is scrunched and he’s curled in on himself like he’s trying to make himself smaller. Buck places a hand on his leg and shakes him gently.

Eddie shoots up, hissing in pain and clutching his shoulder. His eyes dart wildly around the room, unseeing.

“Hey, hey, just a dream, you’re okay,” Buck says.

Eddie’s eyes are wide with fear as they meet Buck’s. He sucks in a ragged, shuddering breath, then sags.

“I- you. You were- fuck,” Eddie stutters, scrubbing a hand across his face.

“It’s okay, you’re okay,” Buck repeats. He pulls Eddie to his chest. “You’re okay.”

Buck rocks them back and forth gently as his shirt slowly grows wet with Eddie’s tears.

“Sorry, I’m sorry,” Eddie gasps against him. Buck just holds him tighter.

“Don’t be,” he murmurs, “I’ve got you.”

Eventually, Eddie pulls back, wiping his eyes with his good hand.

“Do you want to talk about it?” Buck asks after a moment.

Eddie shakes his head but begins to speak anyway. “It was- I saw you, covered in blood and I couldn’t... couldn’t move, or, or help you. And- and then you were coughing up blood, just like at the party, and I tried, Buck I tried but it was like I was stuck in quicksand and I couldn’t-“ Eddie’s breathing has gone ragged again, so Buck grabs his hand.

“Me?” he can’t help but ask.

“Evan,” Eddie says, so tenderly it hurts.

Evan.

They fall asleep curled together, Eddie’s hand resting over Buck’s heart. It’s the first decent sleep Buck’s had since the shooting.

They don’t talk about it the next day, mostly because Buck doesn’t know what to say. He suspects Eddie doesn’t either.

Instead, much to Christopher’s delight, Buck makes pancakes. The three of them eat together on the couch, watching some cartoon that Chris seems interested in and Buck’s never seen before. It’s so painfully normal. Buck was terrified he’d never get to have this again, and now that he does he can’t shake the feeling that the other shoe is going to drop.

Evan.

That night, Eddie wordlessly pulls Buck into his bedroom. They lay facing each other in the dark. Buck wants nothing more than to bridge the gap between them, but it might as well be the Grand Canyon.

There’s not much light in the room, just the ambient glow of the city filtering in through the cracks in the blinds. It’s enough to see Eddie’s face by, but it doesn’t help Buck read his inscrutable expression. He eventually gives up trying and closes his eyes.

He’s stiff, and sleep evades him. If Eddie’s shifting is any indication, he’s still awake too. Finally, Eddie heaves a sigh and, to Buck’s surprise, wraps a hand around Buck’s wrist and pulls. Buck opens his eyes and sees the silent question in Eddie’s.

Is this okay?

Buck presses himself into Eddie’s space without hesitation.

Evan.

Eddie has a doctor’s appointment the next day, and Buck’s agreed to meet Taylor for coffee after dropping him off. Carla’s with Chris for the day, to help him with school, leaving Buck with a free hour on his hands for the first time in over a week.

His stomach has been in knots all morning. He’s not sure if it’s the prospect of letting Eddie out of his sight for the first time since he’s been home, or the conversation he knows he’s about to have with Taylor.

Because he’s thought about it, and the idea of being with Taylor… he’s kidding himself. Before, maybe. But now, after, with the mess of feelings he has twisting in his chest - he’s not in a place to start something new. He’s not even sure he wants it - her - anymore. Taylor’s great, but she could never fill the hole that was punched in his chest by the same bullet that tore through Eddie’s shoulder.

He’s starting to wonder if he’ll spend the rest of his life dividing things into before and after.

Taylor’s already seated when he arrives, fingers wrapped around a cardboard coffee cup that’s still steaming. Buck almost expected to change his mind when he saw her, to suddenly remember why he was interested in the first place, but mostly he’s just anxious to get back to Eddie. He doesn’t even really feel the old curl of attraction he’s used to. He sits in front of her, suppressing a sigh.

Taylor looks up at him, wearing an expression he can’t quite decipher. “Buck,” she says.

Evan.

“Hey, Taylor.”

“You don’t want coffee?” She asks, inclining her cup towards him.

Buck shakes his head. “Had some this morning,” he shrugs. “Don’t want to get jittery.”

Taylor frowns slightly, but doesn’t say anything.

They sit in awkward silence for what feels like an eternity before Buck finally breaks it.

“Look, Taylor,” he sighs. “There’s a lot going on right now, and I just… whatever this thing is between us, I’m not sure I have the space to figure it out. You deserve someone who’s all in, and I just can’t be right now.”

Taylor blows out a breath. “Oh thank god,” she says.

And that’s… unexpected. Buck raises a brow.

“You’re my friend, and I care so much about you, but I- I was scared, and I didn’t know what to do with it, so I told myself it was something else.” Taylor doesn’t look him in the eye. “All this earnestness is making me nauseous,” she jokes weakly.

Buck huffs out a short laugh. The tightly wound anxiety in his gut loosens, just a bit. “Friends, then?”

Taylor finally looks at him and smiles. “Friends,” she agrees.

“How was coffee?” Eddie asks. He’s looked vaguely constipated since Buck picked him up, but insists that his appointment went fine.

“Good,” Buck replies honestly. “We’re on the same page.” He’s driving, but out of the corner of his eye, he sees Eddie’s face do something complicated.

“Good,” he says. “That’s good.” There’s a beat of silence. “So you’re… together, then?”

Buck glances at Eddie, whose eyes are fixed on the road ahead of them. His expression is carefully neutral, but tight around the edges. Buck huffs a soft breath. “Nah,” he says. “End of the day it wasn’t what either of us wanted.”

Some of the tension bleeds out of Eddie’s posture. “Oh. I, uh- are you okay with that?”

Buck chuckles lightly at that. “Yeah, Eds. Pretty sure I’ve got everything I need right now.”

Evan.

Sleeping in the same bed at night becomes something of a habit, just like not talking about it does. It’s not that Buck doesn’t want to. He’s just… not sure how. What do you say when you’ve got so many feelings that you can’t even begin to decipher them, and the only thing you know for sure is that the thought of letting your best friend out of sight for more than a few minutes sends you careening towards a panic attack? There’s not exactly a greeting card for that.

This song and dance, though, it’s familiar. Comforting, in its own way. They’ve always flirted with the line between friendship and more, daring to put a toe over it, but never to take an actual step. Buck can’t help but wonder if this is a step, and they’re both just too chickenshit to admit it.

Evan.

“Where’s Ana?” Buck asks one morning, apropos of nothing. “I would’ve expected to see her around more often.”

Eddie stiffens. “We, uh, we broke up.”

Buck whirls around, nearly flinging egg against the backsplash. “When?”

“After the party.” Eddie shrugs uncomfortably.

Buck’s eyebrows raise. “I’ve been with you 24/7 since then,” he says. The question is obvious.

Eddie rubs a hand through his hair and frowns sheepishly. “I… texted her?”

Buck’s jaw drops. “You ended a 6-month relationship, a week after you got shot, over text?”

“In my defense, I was on a lot of painkillers. It seemed like a good idea at the time.”

Buck can’t help but laugh, throwing his head back. After a moment, Eddie joins in.

“That,” Buck says between giggles, “was not cool, man!”

“Nope,” Eddie agrees.

It’s the best either of them has felt in weeks.

The night after Buck’s first shift back at the station, Eddie has the worst nightmare he’s had since that first night. It takes Buck three tries to wake him, and the glassy look in his eyes remains far longer than he’d like.

“Please be careful,” Eddie says finally. “You have to- I can’t-“

“I promise,” Buck says, holding him tight to his chest.

Evan.

It’s Buck’s own nightmare that brings things to a head.

He’s been sleeping surprisingly peacefully since Eddie’s return home, but when the nightmares do return, they’re the worst he’s had.

He dreams he’s stuck beneath the firetruck, white-hot pain radiating up his leg, watching helplessly as Eddie bleeds out in front of him. Eddie tries to drag himself to Buck, but each pull makes the wound gush even more blood. Buck tries to yell for him to stop, but he can’t make his jaw work.

He finally wrenches it open, only to find himself sitting bolt upright in bed. His throat feels raw, like he’s been screaming, and Eddie’s hand is clutching his forearm. He knows where he is, but the panic from his dream isn’t receding. It grows louder and louder, until finally, Eddie’s voice cuts through.

“Evan!” He says sharply. “You’re okay, you’re fine. You’re in my room, with me. We’re both okay.”

Buck sags and falls back against the pillow, willing his breathing to slow. “You keep saying that,” he whispers in the dark.

“What?”

“My name. Like it means something.”

“It does,” Eddie says. “Every single piece of you matters.”

And Buck… Buck almost believes him.

Evan.

The elephant in the room grows larger every day, but still, they don’t talk about it. For all intents and purposes, Buck lives at Eddie’s. It’s been months. Eddie doesn’t physically need his help anymore, but neither is willing to let the other go. With Eddie’s return date drawing nearer, though, it’s getting harder to ignore.

Buck doesn’t want to ask, but he has to. He’s been waiting for the other shoe to drop since practically the first night, and he can’t take it anymore. He decides to soften the blow with pancakes.

“I should probably go back to my apartment,” he says, as casually as he can manage, as if the words don’t feel like ripping his still-beating heart out of his chest. Buck tries not to examine that feeling too closely.

“You need something?” Eddie asks, like it hasn’t even occurred to him that Buck might not come back.

“No, I-“

“Oh,” Eddie says. His expression goes carefully blank.

“I just-“ Buck tries to explain.

Eddie holds up a hand forestalling him. “I get it,” he says. “It’s fine.”

Buck swallows, ignoring the voice in his head that says definitively that it’s not.

Evan.

Buck’s out the door, duffle in hand, when Eddie stops him.

“Buck, wait,” he says, “Evan!”

Buck drops his bag in surprise and turns, only to find Eddie much closer than he expected.

“Don’t go,” Eddie says in a rush. “Stay, please. I need you here. With me.”

Buck gapes at him, as slowly the knot of emotions in his chest begins to unravel. The string that encircles the edges, that one he knows well: fear. The one beneath it: anger, at the sniper and the universe for hurting Eddie all over again. Hope and devastation intermingle, while grief lay coiled off to the side.

And the string that runs through the middle, holding it all together… that’s love.

Oh.

Buck gets it now.

He takes a step forward, closing the minuscule gap between him and Eddie. “I don’t want to go,” he whispers.

“Then don’t.”

Buck kisses him, soft and sweet. A promise, one which Eddie returns in kind.

There’re still a million things to talk about, but for once in his life, Evan Buckley is pretty sure he has all the words he needs.

[wikiangela-fanfics]

There’s no way that it’s not going there (with the way that we’re looking at each other)

Ao3 here

6k words

This is the first time I've written a 5+1 fic so I hope it works somehow lol

And huuuuge thanks to @realclowneryfc (hockeyandfootballismyish on ao3) for beta-reading, seriously, I'm so grateful hah ❤️

(Also, I suck at titles, so for now it's a quote from lauv's song, maybe I'll change it if I come up with something better lol)

Enjoy ❤️

***

In hindsight, it should’ve been really obvious. Well, as it turned out, it was. Just not to them - the two people who actually should’ve realized it.

1

It probably wasn’t the first time it happened, far from it, really. People had assumed stuff before, but Eddie never really gave it a second thought. This time though, it really stood out, and got him thinking.

It was shortly after his breakup with Ana when he ran into her at the zoo, next to the ice-cream stand. It was awkward, but because they were both polite, they exchanged some pleasantries, and had a short conversation. Your typical “Hi, how have you been?” said with forced smiles, and planning to escape as quickly as possible.

And just as he was about to make an excuse and walk away, he saw Buck and Christopher walk in their direction from behind Ana. Right, he should’ve been back with their ice-cream a while ago, they were probably tired of waiting.

“Oh.” Ana said, looking in the same direction as him, then back at Eddie. “So you and Buck, huh? Finally.” her smile was more or less genuine this time.

“What?” Eddie frowned in confusion, looking back at her.

“Please, your face just lit up when you saw them. Like it always does.” she sighed. “He’s a lucky guy.”

“What are you talking about?” he was honestly shocked at the insinuation. And ‘his face lit up’? He might have smiled subconsciously, but so what? That was his son and his best friend, what’s wrong with smiling at seeing them? Why look into it for something that wasn’t there?

“That lovestruck expression.” Ana said, then chuckled. “Or are you still in denial?”

“What?” he repeated, eyes back on his guys (God, when did he start calling them that?). They were talking, and Buck was gesticulating wildly, while Chris was laughing so hard he had to stop every couple of steps. It was adorable.

“Nothing.” Ana shook her head, then briefly touched his arm. “It was good to see you, Eddie. Good luck.” and she walked away, with one last smile.

Eddie stood there for a few more seconds, baffled because what the fuck was that conversation. He never expected that, especially not from her.

Buck and Chris’ laughter as they got closer snapped Eddie out of his daze, and he began to make his way towards them.

“Dad!” Chris exclaimed.

“You were supposed to wait by the monkeys.” Eddie said.

“You were taking too long.” Chris complained.

“Yeah, we wanted to make sure you didn’t get lost.” Buck added with that radiant smile. “Where’s the ice-cream?” he asked, looking at Eddie’s empty hands.

“Oh.” Right. Ice-cream. That’s why he was there, alone. “I got distracted.” he admitted with a nervous smile.

“And you say I have a short attention span.” Buck scoffed, all of them walking back in the direction Eddie came from, towards the ice-cream stand.

“I, uh, I ran into Ana.” he admitted quietly, so that only Buck heard.

“Oh?” Buck gave him a weird look. Huh.

“Yeah, we talked for a minute. Couldn’t just walk past her, you know.” he shrugged. “We did date for a while so.”

“No, I get it.” there was something in Buck’s voice he couldn’t quite put his finger on. Huh indeed. “You talked about anything interesting?”

“Just your typical awkward conversation between exes. Nothing exciting.” he licked his lips nervously. That was true. And if Ana had some weird comments about them… that wasn’t anything exciting either, because that was simply not true. At all.

Just then they got to the ice-cream stand, and the topic of Ana ended, thankfully. For some reason it was a little awkward to talk about her with Buck, too. But then Buck said:

“So, superman, what flavor do you want?” and Eddie forgot about anyone that wasn’t those two most important people in his life.

He’d obsess over Ana’s words later, probably. For now, he was gonna be in the moment and enjoy the rest of their day at the zoo, with his family. There was no need to freak out, at least not yet.

2

It didn’t happen often, but occasionally Eddie would ask him to pick Chris up from school or a friend’s house, or whatever. Only when Eddie really wasn’t able to, or wouldn’t get there in time, usually because he was running some errands, and there were long lines or traffic, or he just didn’t time it right. Buck never minded, though. On the contrary, he was more than happy to spend some more time with his favorite human. If not for the fact that Eddie felt bad for asking him, or anyone, for help, Buck would help out even more. He tried to, at least.

Now was one of those times. Eddie was across town, doing whatever he was doing, and he called Buck to ask if he could pick Christopher up from school, since Carla had a day off.

Buck eagerly agreed, since it was their day off,and he wasn’t doing anything important. It’s not like he had anywhere to be or anyone to meet, especially now that he and Taylor had broken up. Besides, he’d drop everything for Chris, anyway.

He got there a few minutes before Chris’ last class ended, so he decided to wait with all the other parents. Well, with all the parents. He was not a parent, obviously, though there were times when he thought that Christopher really could be his own kid. He’d love that more than anything.

Just then, when he was waiting, Eddie called him again.

“Hey, did you pick him up?”

“The last class is still going, Eds. But I’m here.”

“Great, thanks.” Eddie exhaled. “I’m on my way back, but apparently there was some accident and there’s more traffic than normal-”

“Eddie, relax.” Buck chuckled. “I don’t mind, really. At this point it’s really not that weird for me to pick up your kid from school.” he added. They were best friends, and Buck’s done this before but Eddie still felt like he was asking for too much. He always thought he should be able to do everything on his own, without asking for help. That was admirable, but also stupid, because Buck was always going to be there for him, for them. “Calm down. And drive carefully, so that you don’t end up in an accident, too.”

“Yeah, yeah, I know.” Eddie sounded frustrated, probably annoyed while in traffic. Buck could relate. “You have your keys, right?” he asked. Buck had spare keys to Eddie’s house, and of course he had them with him at all times, especially when he was about to drive Chris home and Eddie wasn’t there yet.

“Yes, Eddie, I have my keys.” Buck rolled his eyes. “Seriously, you’re making it a bigger deal than it is. Now focus on driving, and stop bothering me.” he added jokingly. “I’ll see you at home.” was what slipped out of his mouth. He didn’t know when Eddie’s house became just home in his head, but at some point it did. He didn’t know why, but he wasn’t going to analyze it, either. He didn’t wanna open that can of worms yet. “We’ll stop by the grocery store and I’ll start on dinner. Any requests?”

“Nah, just, something edible.” Eddie chuckled.

“Fine.” Buck sighed. He’s just gonna have to ask Chris what he wanted to eat. “So I’ll see you later.” he said, wanting to finish the conversation, as there were like three minutes left before the bell.

“Text me when you’re home.” Eddie added, and huh, it was either him being distracted, or the fact that Buck called it home too. But it made Buck grin widely.

“Sure. Bye, Eds.” he said, and hung up.

He was still smiling as he pocketed his phone, when he caught one of the moms standing nearby looking at him. When their eyes met, he nodded at her in a greeting, and she approached him.

“Hi. I’m Lisa. Tommy’s mom.” she held out her hand, which Buck took.

“Buck. I, uh, I’m here for Christopher.” he said, not really knowing why. And why the hell was this soccer mom talking to him? This never happened before, but then again, he never saw her either, when he was here. Maybe someone else was picking up her kid. He did know Tommy, though, since he’d come over to Diaz’ house a couple of times when Buck was there, but he never had a chance to meet his mom.

“Oh, so you’re the famous Buck!” she exclaimed with a laugh. “Tommy mentioned you. And Christopher always talks about you when he’s over at our house.” she said with a smile, that seemed somehow equally genuine and forced. “So you’re Eddie’s…?” she trailed off, clearly waiting for him to fill in the gap. So she was one of those gossiping, prying moms, huh? Well, Buck got really lucky today, didn’t he?

“Friend.” he finished with a polite smile, for some reason feeling heat in his cheeks. Why was he blushing? Fuck.

“Oh?” she seemed genuinely taken aback. “I thought- well, doesn’t matter. It’s nice to meet you, uh… Buck?” she said his name slowly, and quite judgmentally.

“What did you think?” he asked despite himself. He just wanted this conversation to be over, but he’d lie if he said he wasn’t curious.

“Oh, nothing.” she waved her hand dismissively. “It’s just, you know, the way Christopher always talks about you, and sometimes Eddie, too. And, I’m really sorry, but I couldn’t help but overhear some of your conversation right now, and, just, you know. We kind of thought you were Eddie’s, uh, partner.” she laughed, but Buck was stumped. When and how the fuck did she get that impression?

“Uhh… we?” he asked, as if that word was the most baffling thing about that sentence.

“You know, some of the other parents and I.” she shrugged.

“Uh-” before Buck could say anything, the bell rang, which meant the kids would be leaving soon.

“Well, it was nice to meet you.” Lisa repeated, walking away from him, as if she didn’t just say some of the most insane things Buck’s heard.

Buck was honestly so shocked, he couldn’t even move. So apparently Chris and Eddie talked about him in a way that could indicate… No. Nah. No way. Lisa misunderstood. But apparently there were other parents who thought so, too… So they were one of the topics of their gossip, as it turned out. Buck wasn’t even sure if he should tell Eddie about that. How would he even go about it? ‘Hey, the parents of kids in Chris’ class apparently think we’re dating, how about that, huh? Ridiculous, right?’. Yeah, no. Not when he had some, well, unnamed feelings about this whole thing and his relationship with Eddie. He needed to figure it out before he accidentally said something he couldn’t take back. But why the hell would they think… and what was it about that conversation? What the hell?

“Buck!” Christopher’s voice got him out of his thoughts, thankfully. He felt a wide smile tugging at his lips at seeing the little guy.

“Hey, buddy.” Buck said, messing up his hair and taking his backpack. “Your dad is stuck in traffic, so I’m gonna take you home. Sound good?”

“Very.” Chris said, as they slowly made their way to Buck’s car.

“But first, we’ll do some shopping. What do you feel like eating for dinner? Your dad says anything’s fine.” Buck said, and they started talking about what food would be quite quick and easy, and in Buck’s range of skills (he wasn’t horrible at cooking, certainly better than Eddie, but he wasn’t a chef, either).

And at that moment, he honestly couldn’t care less if people thought he and Eddie were more than friends. Because honestly, he wasn’t sure he’d mind if that was true.

3

They both might have thought about those situations a little too much, and had their respective freakouts, but then they decided not to fixate on it any longer and just go about their lives as usual. They were confused about their own feelings, and sure that the other will never feel the same. For the time being, they wanted to just ignore it, and act like they normally do.

Which included grocery shopping together, with Chris, of course, followed by dinner made by Buck, and a movie night. At this point it became their weekend thing. Every week, without fail, on whichever day when Buck and Eddie weren’t working.

“Dad!” Chris called, walking over to where Eddie stood with their cart. “Can we get chocolate cookies?”

“Please?” Buck asked, walking behind him, holding two bags of cookies. “For dessert.”

“If you promise not to eat the whole thing at once again.” Eddie said, crossing his arms. Last time those two bought candy, they ate so much of it they felt horrible, and Eddie had to deal with all that. “Both of you.” he added, pointing his finger first at Chris, then Buck.

“Promise.” Buck said, but pouted, and fuck, he was so adorable. Wait, at what point did he start thinking of Buck as adorable?

“Promise, daddy.” Chris smiled innocently. He was even more adorable. Eddie could not say no, not with two pairs of puppy-dog eyes directed at him. He would definitely have to keep an eye on them though.

“Fine.” he relented, and Buck put the cookies in the cart with a grin. “But no more sweets.” Eddie added firmly.

“You’re no fun.” Buck muttered, but he kept smiling, and Eddie had to smile, too. God, those shopping trips felt so domestic. He loved it.

“We also need chips for the movie.” Chris added. Eddie turned to look at Buck.

“You know, you might feed us actual food, but there’s also never been more junk food in my house than when you’re there.” he sighed, and Buck at least looked a little guilty. Buck usually ate quite healthy, but allowed himself to indulge in junk food for this one night every week, which usually ended with Chris doing the same, since Buck would let him do anything he wanted, really. It was sweet, but also kind of… annoying. Because then Eddie was left to be the strict one.

“I can’t say no to this face.” Buck said, looking back at Chris with a smile.

“You’re spoiling him.” Eddie remarked. He wasn’t mad or anything. It was this one night, and they’d probably be full after dinner anyway. He had to at least appear like he minded, though, right? So that they both knew it wouldn’t be that easy to get what they wanted. It wasn’t enough to just bash their eyelashes and smile at him… or at least they didn’t need to know that it worked.

“So?” Buck raised an eyebrow. “Come on, buddy, let’s go get chips.” he added pointedly, walking out of the aisle they were in.

Eddie just looked after them, feeling a soft smile on his face, and shook his head. His two guys…

“You have a beautiful family.” he heard from beside himself, and when he looked, a nice older lady was looking at him with a pleasant smile.

“Uh, thank you.” he grinned. They were a family. Buck was his family. No matter if it was as a best friend, or maybe more, he made his way into Eddie’s life, and he was always going to be a part of it. That much he was sure of. “Yeah, they’re pretty great.”

“You two remind me of my husband and I. How long have you been together?” the lady then asked, and Eddie felt himself blush.

“Oh, we’re n-” he paused, thinking it over for a second. “Not long.” he settled on. “He’s really great with my son, though.” he added, not really sure why he was making a conversation with some random lady at the store. “And my son adores him.”

“Well, that’s the most important thing, isn’t it?” she smiled. “Seems like he’s a keeper.”

“He really is.” Eddie sighed. Then, Buck and Chris showed up again with more junk food than he agreed on. He’d have to hide all that shit, so that neither of them knows where it is…

When he looked around, the lady was just leaving the aisle, continuing her shopping. It was nice in a way to talk to someone and confirm that he was dating Buck, even if it wasn’t true. He wanted to see how it’d feel. If he’d panic, like he did with Ana. But no. Someone assumed they were a family, he, Buck, and Chris, and he felt more content and peaceful than ever. It felt right. More right than anything has felt in a long, long time.

He did freak out a little though, later, when he was already in bed, after the movie night had ended and Chris went to bed, and he and Buck cleaned up. Because, fuck. He was in love with his best friend. He wanted his best friend to fill a position in his family that he wasn’t sure Buck would even want. But Eddie knew that he couldn’t just keep ignoring those feelings for the rest of his life. Sooner or later, he’d have to deal with it. He just hoped he’d manage to get a read on Buck and figure out if he felt the same way. He didn’t dare hope, not yet, but… but. If there was even the smallest chance, he might be willing to take that risk. Not yet. But soon.

4

There was a knock at the door, which then opened before he could take even one step further.

“Anybody home?” he heard the familiar voice, as he was making his way to the front door.

“Hola, abuela.” he grinned, giving his grandma a hug. It was a surprise visit, but a welcome one, as always. It was a Saturday morning, though, and Christopher had woken up literally ten minutes before.

“Have you eaten breakfast yet?” she asked, obviously looking for a negative answer, as she had a bag, presumably with food, in her hands. Eddie took it to carry to the kitchen.

“Not yet, we just woke up.” he chuckled, as she followed him there.

“Just woke up? It’s ten am!” she exclaimed. Ah, the elderly, and their weird habit of getting up at sunrise.

“It’s Saturday. We slept in.” he shrugged. “You have perfect timing, though, I was just about to start on breakfast.”

“Well, now you don’t have to.” she said, and he looked into the bag, where he had every meal of the day, from breakfast to dinner, for what seemed like a week. Or two days, since Buck was there, and he loved abuela’s cooking. “Is Christopher awake?”

“Yeah, he should be.” Eddie said. He knew for a fact Chris woke up, but there was a chance of him falling back asleep. He went to bed super late, because they had a movie night, and Eddie let him stay up. He couldn’t always be the strict parent. Or, the strict one out of him and Buck. Not that he considered Buck Chris’ coparent. Though maybe he kind of did. It was weird. He didn’t want to put that much responsibility on Buck (then again, there was his will), but he couldn’t help but notice how well Buck fit that role. And he didn’t seem to mind, either.

Abuela made her way to Chris’ room, and Eddie went with her, planning to check if Buck is awake, too. But before they could enter Christopher’s room, the door to Eddie’s room opened, and a sleepy Buck came out. His hair was messy, he was shirtless, and hot, and cute, and for a second there Eddie forgot how to breathe.

“Morning.” Buck said, rubbing his eyes and yawning. Then he actually took a look at who was standing before him, and he smiled. “Oh, hi, abuela.” Eddie loved that Buck called his abuela that, on her insistence, no less. She loved him. Then again, who didn’t?

“Hello, Buck.” there was a soft smile on her face. Then she looked back at Eddie, raising her eyebrow. “You two finally talked, huh? About damn time.”

“What?” he felt his eyes widen, and he was afraid they were gonna pop out of his head. Was she suggesting… Fuck. Yet another person. How… Then he thought about the situation that was happening. Buck came out of Eddie’s room, half-naked, after clearly having spent the night there. Plus, there were no blankets on the couch, indicating that Eddie could’ve slept there. Of course she came to that conclusion. And she seemed happy about it, too. What the hell. “Wh- uh, what do you mean?” he asked, cursing himself for asking for clarification. He knew his grandma, she was gonna say whatever the hell she was thinking. And he already felt his face burning, and was afraid to look at Buck.

“I mean you two finally getting together, of course.” she rolled her eyes.

“Oh, we’re not…” it was Buck who said it. Of course he said it. They weren’t. And Buck would never want to… “We just, um-”

“We slept in my bed, because we were too tired to set up the couch.” Eddie said, tone firm. He got a grip, finally. Took a little longer than he’d like. He sneaked a peak at Buck, who was also red in the face, and not looking at him. “Nothing more, Abuela.” And it really was just that. It wasn’t the first time they shared a bed. Eddie’s bed was big enough, and much more comfortable than the couch. And Buck might’ve cuddled him in his sleep, and Eddie loved that, but no one had to know.

“Really?” she frowned, and she sounded skeptical. Yeah, well, she knew Eddie really well. Of course she noticed that he was head over heels in love with Buck. She didn’t have to talk about it in front of him, though.

“Why don’t we go see if Christopher’s up?” Eddie asked, a huge, fake smile on his face. He prayed for the earth to open up and swallow him whole. How the hell would he be able to look his best friend in the eyes now? It would be different if someone assumed that while he wasn’t in love with him. As it was… it was gonna be awkward. At least on Eddie’s part. Fuck.

“And I’ll go, um, get dressed.” Buck murmured, stepping back into Eddie’s room and closing the door.

“Abuela!” Eddie whisper-shouted. “Why?”

“What? I thought you finally told him-”

“Shh!” he interrupted her, and now he really got scared, because one did not just shush Isabela Diaz. “Sorry.” he added quickly. She seemed understanding, though. “You could’ve asked me in private.”

“I’m sorry, Eddie.” she moved to hug him. “I’m sure you two will work it out.”

“He doesn’t-”

“He does.” she interrupted. “You just need to man up and talk to him.” she pulled away and looked at him. “Don’t wait too long, though. Quiero ver tu boda antes de morir.” she added with a huge smile, and fuck, he hoped Buck didn’t hear and that he didn’t know Spanish. It was very possible she was going crazy in her old age (well, maybe not, but that’s what he could say to Buck to explain her weird comments).

“There’s not gonna be any wedding, because he doesn’t-” Eddie sighed with frustration. “Can we drop this subject?”

“For now.” she relented, and opened the door to Christopher’s room. The kid got so happy when he saw her. Eddie left them alone and went back to the kitchen. He needed to figure out what to say to Buck. If there even was anything to say at all.

Buck came into the kitchen, already dressed, before Chris and abuela. So now there were the two of them, alone. Buck was avoiding eye contact. Shit.

“So.” Eddie started, a nervous chuckle escaping him.

“So abuela brought food, huh?” Buck asked, seeing the tupperware, already out of the bag. Oh. So they were going to ignore that situation… Eddie wasn’t sure whether to be relieved or disappointed.

“Yeah. A lot of food.” Eddie laughed, nervously rubbing the back of his neck. “Help yourself.”

“Sweet.” Buck grinned, moving to take the plates out of the cabinet. Then he proceeded to set the table for the four of them, not even knowing if grandma was gonna eat with them, as she might have been after breakfast already. “Where are they?” he asked then.

“You can just start eating.” Eddie shrugged.

“No, we always eat breakfast together.” Buck said casually. Always meaning whenever Buck spent the night there, of course. It was nice, they had their little routine or whatever.

Just then, Christopher and abuela came into the kitchen, the kid getting as excited over all the food as Buck. Eddie watched them as he sat down at the table opposite Buck. God, he loved his family. And Buck was… Buck fit with them so perfectly and seamlessly, it was hard to remember that they met merely three years ago. It felt as if Eddie had known him his whole life.

And by now, Buck has stopped avoiding eye contact, as if forgetting anyone said anything. Eddie was glad, at least it wasn’t awkward. At the same time, though, maybe if they talked, something would finally happen that could bring all Eddie’s hopes a little closer to reality. As it was, he was pretty sure Buck didn’t feel the same way. He didn’t want to risk their friendship, no matter what his abuela might think.

5

It was a nice, quiet evening, disrupted only by the low volume of the TV. Buck was half-asleep, leaning against Eddie on the couch. Eddie didn’t seem to mind, and Buck was too tired to move as he’d had a long day. He wasn’t sure if he was already dreaming, or still quite awake, but he swore that he had felt Eddie’s hand play with his hair. Then he heard Christopher’s footsteps.

“Shhh.” Eddie immediately whispered. “Buck’s asleep.”

“Can I watch TV with you?” Chris asked, his voice also quiet. Buck was in that stage of sleep when he was aware of what’s happening around him, but he was almost asleep already. It’s not like he was pretending to sleep to eavesdrop or anything. He was just exhausted, and Eddie’s couch was so comfortable, and Eddie’s arm wrapped around him was even more comfortable. He wouldn’t be able to move and ruin that even if he really wanted to.

“Sure. Just be quiet, okay? Let’s let him sleep for a while.” Eddie was still whispering, but Buck could hear the smile in his voice.

He felt the couch move a little, as Chris settled on the other side of him. Then Eddie’s hand disappeared from his hair, and he felt himself being covered with a blanket, after which Eddie’s hand returned. Buck was pretty sure by now he was leaning against Eddie’s chest, with Eddie’s other arm around his shoulders. It was so nice, and so warm, and so comfortable. It really was no surprise that he was almost asleep. He was kind of in and out of sleep all the time, though. But he could swear that after Eddie covered him with a blanket and went back to combing his fingers through Buck’s hair, he kissed Buck’s forehead. Unless it was a very vivid dream. He really didn’t wanna open his eyes and check, it was nice to hope, for at least a little while.

“Dad?” he heard Chris after a while (it could have been seconds or minutes, or even an hour, he was half-asleep and it felt like time flew differently).

“Yeah?”

“Are you and Buck together?” there was pure curiosity in the boy’s voice, but Eddie sounded like he choked on his own spit, and Buck almost sat up. He managed to keep his composure, but he was definitely awake now.

“Why-” Eddie started a little loudly, and, probably worrying he’d wake Buck, he lowered his voice back to a whisper. “Why would you ask that?”

“You just look like a couple.” Chris sounded so matter-of-fact. Where the hell did people get that impression? Did everyone see how in love Buck was? Apparently he was obvious enough for a kid to notice (though aren’t kids the most perceptive people anyway?). God, what if Eddie knew? That would be embarrassing. But he never said anything… Probably not to make things awkward. Why would he want Buck, right?

“What do you mean?” Eddie was still whispering, but he sounded nervous.

“Dad, you’re cuddling.” he said, and Buck could imagine his raised eyebrows and an unimpressed expression. There was no bullshit with this kid. “And you’re playing with his hair. When he stays over he sleeps with you. And you always look at him like that.”

“Like what?”

“Like you love him.” and oh wow. What did that even mean? How did this kid notice it (if it was even true)?

“How old are you?” Eddie asked disbelievingly. “How do you even-” he took a deep breath, and Buck felt Eddie’s chest rising under Buck’s cheek. “No, we are not together.” he answered finally.

“Do you want to be?”

“What’s with all the questions?” Eddie asked defensively.

“I love Buck.” Chris answered. “And if you want to date him, I’d be okay with it.” he added, probably because he knew, of course he knew, that Eddie always thought of him first, and how Eddie’s decisions would affect him. And with Buck, it would be difficult, wouldn’t it? Like, if they were together and, God forbid, broke up, and the break up was bad? Buck would never want to stop seeing the kid, but he’d have no right to keep doing it. Though there was Eddie’s will, but Buck had no idea how that played in, he honestly tried not to think about it much, because it was a lot, and he was overwhelmed enough with his feelings for Eddie.

“That’s-” Eddie sighed softly, and Buck knew, don’t ask him how, he just did, that Eddie smiled. “That’s great, buddy. Thanks. Can I tell you a secret? But you have to promise not to tell anyone, not even Buck.” he added even more quietly, then moved, probably to see if Buck is asleep.

“I promise.” Chris said, and then Buck also felt the couch move, so Chris probably moved closer.

“I do wanna date him.” he said so quietly Buck could barely hear it, but he did. And oh, fuck. Did he just say what he just said?

“That’s awesome!” Chris exclaimed, and Eddie shushed him.

“But I don’t know if he wants to date me.” Eddie added.

“So ask him.” Christopher said, as if it was the easiest thing in the world. Buck knew it wasn’t. Not even close. But if he heard all that correctly…

“Yeah, Eds. Just ask me.” Buck finally spoke up, not able to hide a smile as he did. He felt Eddie tense.

“You’re awake.” Eddie was still whispering, though now there was a tone of fear.

“Mhm. Been for a while.” he slowly sat up. “Sorry for eavesdropping, couldn’t help myself.” he grinned, looking at Eddie. When Eddie saw him smile, he relaxed a bit, and smiled, too. “So what was it about dating me?”

“I mean, everyone keeps assuming we’re dating. Including my own son, apparently.” he looked past Buck, at Chris, briefly. He still looked a little nervous. “It got me thinking.”

“Oh yeah?” Buck leaned back against Eddie, bringing their faces close. “About what?”

“About-” he shot another nervous glance at Christopher. This was a not a ‘oh fuck I’m freaking out, what now’ glance, though, that was a ‘am I seriously about to kiss this guy for the first time in front of my kid’ glance. And apparently, he decided to say ‘fuck it’ and just did it. He closed the distance between himself and Buck, and just kissed him, right there, on Eddie’s couch, right after Buck woke up from a nap, next to Christopher, who cheered and made them both blush. It was short and sweet, and perfect. It just felt right, more than anything else ever did. “We’re gonna do more of that later. And maybe talk. Later.” Eddie whispered, briefly kissing him again. “When my son is not right there.”

“Okay.” Buck smiled, settling back on Eddie’s chest. “That sounds perfect.”

“You’re welcome.” they heard from the other end of the couch. They both were stunned for a second and looked at him in confusion. “I thought you were dating, and asked dad about it while Buck was here. And now you are dating.” he explained, annoyance at their ungratefulness audible in his voice. Both Buck and Eddie just laughed.

“Thanks, superman.” Buck mumbled, slowly falling back asleep. “I owe you one.”

“We owe him much more.” Eddie wrapped his arms tightly around Buck. “You have no idea how happy I am.” he whispered into Buck’s hair.

“Trust me, I have some idea.” Buck could not stop grinning. Finally, after people left and right assuming they were together, it was true. They kissed, they knew that they both wanted the same thing, or they more or less knew, they still needed to talk, but it was great. Buck could not be happier. He didn’t think he’d ever been happier in his life. That was the best day of his life.

+1

“Hey, I’m here!” he heard Buck’s voice coming from the hallway. “You ready?” he asked, his voice closer.

“Yeah, just a minute!” Eddie answered, finishing buttoning up his shirt. Then he saw his boyfriend (boyfriend! It’s been weeks, and he was still as excited even thinking about it as when they made it official) come into his room, and lean against the doorway. “Hey.” he smiled at him, looking him up and down. Damn, he looked good. As he always did, really, but it was date night, and he looked fucking amazing in his white button-up shirt, top two buttons undone, of course, and black jeans.

“Hello, gorgeous.” Buck said, smiling brightly. Eddie felt himself blush a little. “Chris asleep?”

“No, it’s not even seven.” Eddie chuckled. Then he looked back into the mirror, fixing his hair.

“It looks good, leave it be.” Buck rolled his eyes. “Besides, to me, you always look breathtakingly handsome.”

“Give me a sec.” Eddie’s cheeks were bright red now. Damn, how could Buck still make him blush this hard?

“Fine, I’ll go say hi to Christopher.” Buck said and moved to leave, but then Eddie stopped him:

“Hey, didn’t you forget something?”

“What?” and before he could do or say anything, Eddie walked up and kissed him. He wanted to just give him a quick peck, but, well, it was Buck. And he kissed so fucking well, it was impossible. Besides, Eddie loved him, and kissing him was one of his favorite activities now. So he kind of forgot himself, and let the kiss develop into a quick make-out session.

“Hi.” he whispered into his lips, biting his lip lightly before pulling away. They were both flushed and a little out of breath.

“Wow.” Buck chuckled, leaning in for one more quick kiss. “That’s some welcome.”

“I’m just happy to see you.” Eddie shrugged, getting back to the mirror.

“Okay, well, I’m happy to see you, too.” he answered, a beautiful smile on his face. “But hurry up, we have a reservation.” he added, then finally left the room.

Just as Eddie finished getting ready, there was a knock at the door and Carla came, with perfect timing as always. He let her in, then went to Chris’ room, where his guys were talking.

“Carla’s here, and I’m ready to go.” he said.

“Finally.” Buck said with an exasperated sigh, standing up.

“We’re going.” Eddie said, this time to his son. “Be good, and don’t stay up too late, okay?” he messed up his hair and kissed his head.

“I know, dad.” he answered with an eye roll. “Have a good time.”

“Thanks, buddy.” Buck smiled.

Then they left on their date.

***

They were sitting in a restaurant, opposite from each other, and Eddie could not for the life of him focus on the menu. He couldn’t take his eyes off of Buck, scanning every little movement, every little detail. They’ve known each other for years, they’ve been dating for two months now, but he just couldn’t get enough. It was still new and fresh, and Eddie felt so excited and so grateful that he could have this. Being with Buck was the happiest he’s ever been (when it comes to romantic relationships, obviously nothing ever made him happier than his son). It just felt right. Buck, Chris, and Eddie were a family, and he had no doubts, he never panicked thinking about it… They just fit together perfectly. And really, not much changed when it comes to the three of them. Yeah, Buck and Eddie were dating now, but Buck had been a part of their family since day one. Everything was pretty much the same, with some more hand-holding and kissing. And-

“And for your partner?” the waiter’s voice got through Eddie’s thoughts, and he found Buck looking at him with amusement. Oh, wow, Eddie got lost in his own head there for a second. He didn’t even notice the waiter come over, or Buck ordering, which he apparently did.

“My partner,” Buck said, an involuntary smile appearing on his face at the word. Really, it was the first time someone assumed they were together, and was right about it. Well, they were on a date. Still, it was so nice to hear people say that. “will have a glass of wine, too. And, uh, Eds, what do you want to eat?”

“Oh, right, sorry.” Eddie felt his cheeks heat up, as he looked down at the menu and then he read out the first dish he saw. He hasn’t gotten this distracted in a while.

“Great, I’ll be back with your wine in a sec.” the waiter smiled and walked away.

“Where did you go?” Buck asked him, reaching for his hand and chuckling. Eddie intertwined their fingers, and they held hands on the table.

“I don’t know.” Eddie laughed. God, he was probably bright red. “I was just looking at you and thinking how lucky I am.”

“I’m the one that’s lucky.” Buck said softly. “I got you and Christopher. That’s double lucky.”

“I love you so much.” Eddie sighed, smiling so widely his cheeks hurt.

“I love you, too, Eddie.” his boyfriend responded, then drew Eddie’s hand closer to kiss his knuckles and made Eddie blush even more. Damn, he really enjoyed how Eddie reacted to him, huh?

That’s when the waiter came back with their wine, and commented that they make a cute couple. Well, Eddie knew that. People have been saying that, and similar things, since before they even were a couple. He loved that people noticed that, though. He was in love, so hopelessly, madly in love, he wanted to scream it from the rooftops.

Just then, he remembered what his abuela had said a few months ago. Well, it was still too early for that in their relationship, but he felt like she was gonna see that wedding she wanted. One day. Not now, that would be too fast. Though maybe there was one thing he could do now…

“Hey, so I was thinking.” he decided to say what he had thought about quite a lot recently. “Since we’re together now, and you’re always at my house anyway.” he continued, looking down at the table, for some reason kind of afraid of Buck’s reaction. “I was wondering, uh, how would you feel about moving in with Chris and I?” he finished rather quickly, a little nervous, and looked up at Buck again. He honestly wasn’t entirely sure how all the relationship stuff worked with them, since they were first and foremost best friends. But that meant he didn’t have to wait that long to move in with him, right? There was no one who knew them better than each other. Buck had been basically kind of living with them for years, anyway. It wasn’t that big of a deal, and Christopher would be over the moon.

“I’d love to.” Buck breathed out, grinning. “You sure?”

“More than anything.”

“Okay. Yeah, I wanna move in with you.” Buck responded, laughing a little disbelievingly.

Eddie couldn’t help himself then, he leaned over the table and kissed his amazing partner. He honestly couldn’t remember a time when he’d been happier. And that was just the beginning, they had their whole lives ahead of them to be happy together.

[datleggy]

Let’s take “birth day” literally and have pregnant Buck go into labor someplace really dumb and/or inconvenient.

It's the hormones, Buck would like to say in his defense, but honestly, the omega would have done it even if he weren't nearly nine months pregnant....

The doctor's told him some light exercise will help, even with his due date being so close now, and so after picking Christopher up from school they'd decided to take a nice stroll in the park.

And it would have been nice if some asshole hadn't put his hands on his kid on the goddamn playground of all places! One minute Buck had been struggling to get up off the bench to see why it looked as though Christopher was in a seemingly heated argument over something or the other, with another little boy around his age, and the next said boy's mother was shoving Christopher away with a sharply pointed nail, poking at his shoulder and shouting obscenities.

And Buck was there in a flash, putting himself between Christopher and the woman and telling her to back off. "You don't touch someone else's kid like that, lady. If you have a problem, you come find me."

The woman looks flustered for a moment before raising her voice again, yelling about how she had barely even touched the eight year old, and about how maybe he shouldn't bring his son around other kids if he couldn't learn to play nice. "If you taught that boy some manners we wouldn't even be here right now!"

Buck knows he should have let it go, knows they were causing a huge and unnecessary scene, and this? This next part he totally blames on the hormones. "If your parents had taught you some manners and common sense we wouldn't be here right now!"

And that had only served to escalate the situation to the point where police had actually been called and arrived on the scene--and apparently the woman had been very convincing when she'd burst into tears and told the cops that Buck had threatened her with violence.

Which is how Buck ends up in a jailcell on a sunny Friday afternoon, waiting for Eddie to come and bail him out and worrying frantically about Christopher, who last he saw, as they'd cuffed him and put him into the back of their vehicle, was currently in the custody of a child services worker.

Buck puts his head in his hands and groans, beyond stressed. Not only is this humiliating as all hell, but his alpha is probably going to kill him for letting this shit happen. He should have ignored the woman and walked away with Christopher in tow. Instead, he'd made it worse and gotten arrested for an assault he hadn't even committed. "Jesus Christ."

"Buckley? Evan Buckley?" An officer calls out; he's older, maybe mid fifties, with a faint Southern drawl.

Buck raises his head. He'd only called Eddie fifteen minutes ago, was he really here that quickly? "Uh, yeah, that's me." he says.

"You're free to go; luckily a bunch of witnesses came forward with the same story--you weren't the aggressor here, son. Now c'mon, your kid's waiting for you right outside."

"Oh thank God." he breaths out, immeasurably relieved. But when he attempts to stand up Buck lets out a hiss and doubles over, face contorting in pain.

The officers eyes go wide and he rushes to open the cell, which is nearly empty, thankfully, except for Buck and a slumbering man in the corner, arrested that morning for public intoxication. "Whoa, whoa," the man's eyes go even wider, if possible, when he realizes what's happening. "Shoot, I think your water just broke, young man."

Buck shakes his head, even though the proof is on the bench and soaking his jeans through and through. He whines as the contraction continues, huffing and puffing. "H-hospital. Please." He pleads.

There is no way he's having this baby while still technically in custody at a police station. Hell, they're in a jailcell, for shit's sake. He'd rather give birth like a total cliché and in the back of a yellow taxi!

"I'm gonna have 'em call you an ambulance, but let's get you outta here first." the officer tries to help Buck stand but another contraction hits, this one harder and more agonizing than the last and Buck cries out, his knees buckling under him.

The officer manages to hold him aloft just long enough to reposition him on the floor as Buck pants and tries not to lose it. The contractions are way too close...

The officer radios his men and calls for help. "Need help in the holding cell on floor 2B, we've got a custodial here who's gone into labor. Urgent request for help in holding cell 2B."

Buck can't help but let out a sob--it's even worse than he'd imagined--he's going to end up giving birth inside a jailcell five feet away from some guy who smells like tequila and regret. Alone.

"What the hell is going on in--Buck?!"

Buck sniffles as he turns his head towards the door, where Athena is standing, mouth agape at the chaotic scene before her. "Athena!" he cries, reaching out for her, needy as can be and not giving a damn.

Athena doesn't waste any time, dropping to her knees beside him, letting him rest his head on her lap. She sooths back his curly locks, now sweaty, and look at the officer, asking sharply, "What happened?"

"He was being released when he went into labor--must be from the stress of the situation. Tried to get him up, but that baby's comin' and soon." he informs her, grimacing when Buck whines in pain as another contraction follows his statement, as if to prove the mans words true.

"Eddie," Buck clenches his teeth, tries to stifle another groans. "Need Eddie."

"He's right outside," Athena tells him, reassuringly. She nods at the officer. "Reyes, get me Eddie Diaz, he's a medic and he should be waiting down on the first floor for us. Hurry!"

***************

Eddie's at the grocery store picking stuff up for dinner tonight when he gets the unexpected call. He almost doesn't answer it, when he sees it's from an unfamiliar number, thinking it's spam, but something nags at him to take the call.

"Hello?"

"Hey..."

It's Buck. And he sounds upset.

"Buck? What's going on? Everything alright? Who's phone are you using?"

He can hear Buck gulp from the other end of the line. "I've been arrested. I need you to come bail me out and get Christopher out of police custody." he says, all in one rushed statement, like he'd ripping off a band aid.

"Wha--I'm sorry, what? Did you say you're in jail? And Christopher's with the police? What the hell is going on?" Eddie's not proud of the way he raises his voice, especially not in the fruit aisle, where a mother with her toddler gives him a dirty look on her way past, but he's so shocked and panicked he can't stop himself from blurting out, "Buck, what the fuck happened? You were picking Christopher up from school today! Where does jail fit into this?!"

"Eddie, I'm sorry." Buck sighs. "I swear I'll explain everything when you get here, but I don't have a lot of time left on this call and I'm kind of freaking out right now. Please, can you just--"

"Of course, yeah, sorry, I'm on my way, give me like twenty minutes, ok? I'm across town."

"Thank you." the line cuts off abruptly and Eddie's left to ponder what could possibly have happened to have led up to his almost nine months pregnant husband being arrested as he abandons his cart and runs out into the parking lot.

****************

Eddie nearly gets arrested himself, with the way he's speeding down the highway before turning onto the main road and parking right in front of the station, where only police vehicles are allowed.

The alpha finds his kid with a social worker, happily munching on a donut. “Chris!?” Eddie runs over and engulfs his son in a suffocating hug. “Are you ok? What happened?” 

Christopher pulls away slightly, nodding. “I’m ok. Bucky got in trouble ‘cause the lady at the park lied. Officer Reyes said he’s gonna bring him out soon.” 

The social worker explains the whole story to Eddie, “Thankfully there were a lot of witnesses who corroborated the events. Your husband should be out in a few minutes; it was all just an awful misunderstanding. The woman at the park is in custody right now for giving the police a false accusation and wasting everybody’s time.”  

Eddie’s shoulders slump in relief and he practically falls into a chair nearby, pulling Christopher onto his lap and holding him tight around the middle. “Is he ok? Buck is pregnant. He’s due in two weeks.” 

The social worker gives him a sympathetic look. “I’m sure he’s in good hands. Officer Reyes will have him out here in a couple of minutes.” 

****************

After a couple of minutes turns to five, turns to ten, Eddie starts to get angsty. Which is why it’s a good thing, when he happens to spot Athena rounding the corner and into the station. He calls over to her and she furrows her brows in concern before making her way across to them. 

“Eddie? Christopher? What’s going on?” 

“It’s a long story.” Eddie sighs, “But Buck is being held in a cell right now, they said an officer Reyes was supposed to bring him down here, that he was free to go, but that was forever ago,” he exaggerates. “Can you please find out what’s taking so long?” 

“Of course.” 

****************

Buck sobs openly when his alpha enters the room, “Eddie!” he calls out desperately. 

Athena holds Buck close and looks up. “He’s in labor. Contractions are less than a minute apart. He needs to start pushing.” 

Eddie doesn’t hesitate, though his brain feels like it’s about to short circuit if even one more insane thing happens within these twenty four hours. He drops between Buck’s knees and reaches out to squeeze his hand. “Hey, I’m here, I’m here, you’ve got this, ok? Cause I’ve got you.” 

“I’m scared.” Buck admits, tears sliding down face, and he’s shaking like a leaf, terrified that something will go wrong. “I don’t--” he groans pitifully against another contraction. “Don’t wanna have her in here.” 

“I know baby, I know, but she’s coming now, Buck. She’s not gonna wait for us to make it to a hospital. She’s impatient,” Eddie kisses his hand, squeezing again, comfortingly. “Just like you.” 

Buck huffs. “No, like you. Y-you never wait for your soup to cool down.” 

“My Tia’s sopa is worth the burnt tongue.” Eddie plays along, trying to distract him from the pain. “Baby, I need you to push, ok? I know this isn’t how we pictured any of this, but it’s time.” 

Buck nods through the tears and steels himself. 

“Good, good, now push, c’mon, you can do this. I’m right here.” 

****************

“You look handsome in your mugshot.” Eddie tells Buck, staring at the photo he asked Athena to send him on his phone.

Buck glares at the alpha. “Funny.” 

Eddie leans down to kiss the frown off his face. “Sorry, too soon?” 

Buck turns the other way in bed with an annoyed huff. “You’re on baby night duty for the rest of the week.” he shuts the lamp light off and then the room is dim with just the moon peaking in through their blinds. 

“Hey,” Eddie sits up, tilting his head. It’s been over a month since the incident, and sure, it hadn’t been pleasant, but Buck and their baby had made it through just fine, health intact, and in the hospital Buck hadn’t seemed too phased after the ordeal, mostly content with Christopher and the baby curled up against and on him. “That was a stupid joke, I’m sorry.” 

Buck gulps. He’s being way too sensitive about this. Everything turned out alright and shortly after the whole thing had passed Chimney had even teased him that of course only Buck would have bad enough luck to end up giving birth in a holding cell. And Buck had laughed it off. 

Mostly because he’d been relieved. 

And then of course with the new baby the last month has been a whirlwind of constant activity, of making sure all her needs are met, of making sure Christopher’s not feeling neglected, of debating on when he should start thinking about going back to work and--

Eddie’s heart leaps when he hears Buck’s sharp intake of breath. “Buck?” 

Buck sits up now, too, swiping miserably at the tears that suddenly won’t stop falling. “Sorry, I--ignore me. I didn’t--” he sniffles. “I haven’t really thought about that day since--everything’s been so busy with--you know?--and--” he cuts himself off with a choked off sob. “It’s the hormones.” 

It’s been four weeks now and his hormones from the pregnancy are still driving him every which way and he feels ridiculous right now, crying over something he should have processed a month ago already. 

Eddie wraps his arms around Buck and pulls him between his legs and against his chest. “Let it out.” he says. “I’m here. I’ve got you.” 

Buck curls into Eddie and releases all emotion he hadn’t realized he’d been keeping all pent up inside. The fear, the anguish--Buck lets himself be held, coddled, loved. 

It feels good. 

After he’s cried for what feels like ages Buck rests the side of his head on Eddie’s shoulder and exhales. “You know Christopher wanted to name her Tuubee?” he murmurs. 

Eddie, who’s rubbing up and down his husbands back, pauses a moment. “’Tuubee’?” he repeats. 

Buck half smirks against his shoulder. “Two B. The cell where she was born.”

.