#old man hunter????? plz

[ohsnapitzmarvel]

An actual HAPPY ending???? In STAR WARS?????? Involving THE CLONES????? They got to be A FAMILY???? They grew OLD and GREY??? STOPPED fighting??? Omega joining the REBEL ALLIANCE????????

[sexiestpodcastcharacter]

Sexiest Podcast Character — Unscripted Bracket — Round 4

Propaganda

Glenn Close (Dungeons & Daddies):

#Propaganda for Glenn Close: one of the other PCs mentions multiple times how hot he is #Actually several characters point it out but especially Henry #Also the only person in a podcast that has to put a disclaimer about not being a BDSM podcast to have had sex during the course of the show

We didn’t do hot Glenn summer for him to LOSE. Spoilers for his story but MORE PROPAGANDA FOR YOU:

Young hot rocker dilf

Loyal to his dead wife <3

Does in fact smoke weed

BARD!! HES A BARD. HE WAS LEAD GUITAR IN HIS BAND (that he was kicked out of)

His band was a Christmas cover band btw.

Literally the fandom had hot Glenn summer which consisted of drawing him being incredibly hot and sexy

Anti government (ofc)

Kind of cringefail (Disney adult) (was on dilfs of disneyland)

Young and sexy not your style? Then how about HIM AFTER YEARS LOCKED IN A TIME PRISON WITH A DAMN HANNIBAL MASK ??

Lost an eye and wears a fucking eyepatch

One incredibly buff arm

Has a pet rat named after his son <3

Immeasurable amounts of trauma in this man- becomes progressively more unhinged

OH OLD HUMAN BARD ISNT CUTTING IT? FINE

HE BECOMES A FUCKING DEMON

A COOL HOT ONE-EYED DEMON WHO WANTS TO KILL HIS DAD (also sexy)

HE CANONICALLY ENDS CHRISTIAN HELL VIA CHRISTMAS

IS ALSO WAY OVERLEVELED

Becomes a demon hunter for the rest of his existence

Also nonwhite !!! We are done with cringefail whiteboys !!!!!!!!!

I can’t put into words ok just know he is the best plz love him.

Listen, I don't know this other character but I've seem some good arguments for her However Consider Glenn Close winning through no effort of his own in a bullshit way despite being a dick is the most in character thing ever. He leveled up three times and got a crab mech, we GOT to give him this win, it's fitting

I don’t regulate if minors follow me or not bc I’m a pretty chill space but I hope the world is aware that’s the only reason I haven’t been downright nasty about Glenn close. I’m down bad. I’m NOT in the boat of ‘Glenn isn’t sexy but I want him to win bc it’s my fandom’. I would estimate I have 200+ drawings of Glenn on my phone that AREN’T safe for work. Way more that are. Where did they come from? That’s MY business. But I tell you this fact to assure you- Glenn IS sexy. I’m not voting to represent my fandom I’m voting out of TRUTH AND LOVE. IF YOU DON’T GET IT YOU DON’T GET IT!!! I just think my level of feral over this man is more powerful than y’all realize. If you don’t get his sex appeal that’s okay, but don’t doubt that this is my truth.

Okay but Glenn made a minivan cum by talking to her so

HE HAS A BOOK THAT HE MARKS X’S AND CHECKS FOR EVERY DAY TO SEE IF THAT DAY WAS A SUCCESS OR NOT. TO SEE IF HE DID GOOD THAT DAY. ITS ALMOST ENTIRELY X’S. HE WAS CUCKED OUT OF A SON. AND A DEAD WIFE. HE DIDN’T EVEN GET TO KILL HIS DAD IN REVENGE. There’s absolutely nothing going for him except his sex appeal in his life. Nobody he loved remembers him. He lost his eye. All he has is a pet rat and friends who admit they don’t really like him that much. He was kicked out of his own band. The band was named after him. He was kicked out of the Glenn Close trio. All he could do was deez nuts the big bad and be sexy. If nothing else, then pity him. Look in his eyes. Look at his heart and soul. Do you think pickman needs this to feel good about herself? Can she not accept a loss for the sake of a pathetic father? Can she shake hands with the minivan fucker and his human gun and just take the L on this one? He did not do the BDSM episode for this I’ll tell you what. Do this for my his sake. Do it for Nick Jr, who needs the prize money to pay for his rat snacks. Do it for his son. For Morgan. Ganbatte.

Mod Note: While I will still take "bad dads are sexy" propaganda and "bad dads aren't sexy" anti-propaganda, I kindly request no more discussion on whether or not he was a bad father. This is a sexypoll, not a parentingpoll. If you see a post you strongly disagree with, you can just not reblog it.

Mod Note 2: This tournament is about fictional podcast characters. Please do not vote for the real actress Glenn Close.

Lup (The Adventure Zone: Balance):

Is somehow the hot twin between her and Taako

Lup Bluejeans (née... Taaco? Tacco? Taco? Tako? who tf knows this is why I'm going with her husband's last name. doylistly she gets her last name from her brother whose last name is given as "Taako again but spelled differently"): Hot, funny, smart and undead. Is there anything else you could want in a woman?? Well, in case there is: she's also canonically trans

LUP IS THE HOTTEST. VOTE LUP.

[hazethestrange]

You know @gaylactic-fire 's cursed Link generator going around? I saw other people drawing the cursed Links they got and I made this boi! Plz help I already love him. I went overboard and now have a whole world, plot and other things stirribg up hfjsndjdj

Below are just vague ideas I have for these guys :D

Taking place 300 years after Spirit Tracks, Hyrule is experiencing a widescale drought that has lasted 100 years, turning the kingdom into The Great Desert. Once wide fields of lush grass and vegetation, large forests and running rivers are now gone, replaced by dunes of sand. Many people left Hyrule in search of better lives while those who stayed adapted.

Living in the dunes in a small settlement is Link, a young man who spends his days helping out in the small community he calls home while also being a treasure hunter, scavaging for old relics in hopes of making a profit.

On one of his searches, Link stumbles upon old ruins, a dungeon of sorts and discovers a rather bizarre key. Little does he know that this Key is the very item dark forces have been searching for and now Link, along with a mysterious stranger that calls themselves Sheik, travel the old kingdom to complete a mission.

Again, very vague gfjsndjnd.

[hanakihan]

thanks to Vlad and his videos about pretending to be a girl at Omegle (plz check it out it’s pure comedy material) me and homies created cracked AU

so like Jinchul coming from orphanage is really proficient in girly things because he was really close to girls during his orphanage years. Girls found him pretty enough to drag into their circle to try make up on him or just style his hair plus with younger girls he usually ended up the one to style their hair at mornings. He also had friends among boys but boys mostly avoided him because he looked different and was mostly by himself.

So anyway after leaving orphanage Jinchul still kept in touch with others from orphanage from time to time. And one day they gathered for drinks and jinchul lost probably the most dumb bet in his life and he absolutely forgot that betting against group of girls IS a death or life gambling.

So yea he lost and they decided to remember old times so they dress him as a girl and for amusement and funny reactions make him go on Omegle or shit and so jinchul plays really convincing lady until he lets out his real voice and that fun continues for serval hours while his friends die on background from laughter. Jinchul isn’t uncomfortable but it makes him feel awkward because many actually complemented how pretty she looks.

And then randomly they end up connecting with jinwoo and his company and jinchul just starts to sweat nervously because what the actual fuck hunter sung is doing here with his sister and his friend—

jinchul is always this close to failure because his voice just keeps cracking and stuttering and he’s panicking and feels his face continuing become redder and redder because it’s jinah, jinho and songyi doing all the talk and jinwoo just stares at him with ✨suspicion✨ until jinwoo just opens his mouth and asks for phone number and jinchul finally freaks out by making a weird squeaking voice and turning connection off.

Days pass jinchul is kinda panicking around jinwoo because he just keeps staring at him from time to time as if trying to connect the dots (he hopes he won’t).

Jinwoo: Chief, I would be really grateful if you’ll help me find one lady, I would really like to meet her.

Jinchul, sweating nervously: how about N O

Funny thing jinwoo did eventually stumble upon group of girls he saw hanging with that lady and approached them asking if they know how he can contact their friend. They are this close to laugh their asses off but agree to organize a ‘date’ and later jinchul just wants to murder them but he can’t because he cared for them during orphanage years goddamnit.

So yea they actually meet, jinchul dies inside almost entire time (god I hope he won’t notice my mana signature god—), jinchul jokes about being a rather tall lady (and dying inside) and honestly when he’s home he just falls backwards right on door like ‘holy fucking hell’

And then next time he and jinwoo meet at KHA jinwoo like a true little shit admits that he figured out its jinchul because of same mannerisms and stuff plus it’s a national trend now that a local man dresses like a lady perfectly only to give people heart attacks with his real voice. Jinchul dying inside and asking why the meeting then and jinwoo just admits that he wanted to see top tier levels of disguise that Chief Woo is able to pull out (and also to witness him panicking entire time because it’s hilarious)

[swynlake-spill]

Enough about Pip and Phineas's personal drama, when is Build A Brand going public??? Now THAT is a company I want for my portfolio!!

hi phineas i do so love these little chats we have once and a while. how are you? <3

here since we're close personal besties what with u always sliding into my dms i'll give u some personal advice: PEOPLE WHO NEED MAKEOVERS, WHICH LIKE THATS BUILD A BRAND RIGHT? IDK IT IS IN MY HEART

Hercules Kouros. That Man Is Too Fine To Be Dressing Like That

Tibbs and Babette: im simply tired of this slow burn romance i need action i need development i need HEAT if build a brand doesnt fix it then WHO

Mary Gibbs: literally even the e-girls wear color like it is not 1990 please update ur look

Su Qin: now this girl needs the full package, im talking She's All That. Give her the works. New resume, new social media, etc. I guess this would be infinitely awkward bc of Phineas's past with her but its DIRE over there plz c'mon

Mim: also truly threading a fine line here but she is too hot a bitch to be pining over some random chick who cannot keep her dates straight!!!

Vixey: plz note that i personally love vixey this isnt an insult i just think she also needs an updated resume and dating profile now that she's a hot single business owner like whats going on over there!

Hunter: talks like a 65-year old and most of his friends are birds, if he isnt a cry for rebranding WHAT IS

okay ur welcome get to work boys

[han-ban-bam]

Arite I’m typing up my Star Wars spn AU buckle up my dears;;

Castiel is a Jedi Knight at the time of Order 66, Jack Kline is his Padawan.

They are off world when Order 66 starts, evading Troopers they get to the best idea of safety they can manage.

They succeed at being off the radar for X amount of time, getting by, living quietly and despite everything Castiel keeps teaching Jack behind closed doors. In his mind if he were to stop, the Empire wins.

Jack is mid teens when everything shifts.

One day they slip, or something let’s slips, and they are set upon by Stormtroopers and an Inquisitor. Pause: inquisitors are Jedi hunters, Jedi turned Sith in effect. I may be wrong but I'm here for the angst.

As Cas' is cornered, Jack is knocked out and taken away as the Inquisitor stands over Castiel musing over whether to do the same or kill him. With their pause, Castiel strikes and bolts in the chaos.

After getting tf out of dodge, he eventually enlists the help of two scoundrels, Dean and Sam. Dean does the best business sell of his life, or so he thinks, whilst Cas is running out of time and agrees.

I've just decided the brothers have a BD Unit. Namely for him to be very tall on Sam's shoulder and for Dean to bicker and mother it.

Cas' tells them he's a Jedi after the first skirmish they get into, and gives them an out if they no longer want to help. The brothers say fuck that. Where to next?

Ultimately they discover X location where Jack is being held the Empire. Cas attempts to give the brothers another out, they shut that down bc Cas!! We are ride or die for u and ur kid!!

They formulate their plan and arrive at the base with the old ‘we captured this guy for u, payment plz’ routine.

Forcing their way through the base. Tech boy Sam time to shine bb! He discovers the purpose of the building, and discovers where Jack is being held, bruised and exhausted.

The facility they find themselves in is one where force-sensitive kids, and where previous Jedi are made into Sith/Inquisitors. The process is through pain and agony. Jack seems to be the only one around, this is concerning for a multitude of reasons.

They all bolt for the ship, but the Inquisitor from earlier cuts them off. She names/reveals herself as Inquisitor Abaddon. Recognising Cas' and having been waiting for him; They have unsettled business.

Cas gives Jack to Sam and tells them to run so he can hold her off.

Cue This Exchange.

As Cas and Abaddon fight, Sam and Dean get on board the Impala. They settle Jack on a bunk, Dean tells Sam to ready take off and goes to help Cas.

Sam tries to stop him but Dean turns and regales him with his very brief but bold plan.

Cas is about to be struck down when the Impala fires down on Abaddon giving Dean the opening to dart in and rescue Cas, carrying/pulling him back to the ship as Sam just takes pot shots.

Cas is badly wounded, Dean is working like a mad man to get him stabilised as well as seeing to the kids wounds. Sam comes to help when he has the Impala in a safer territory (probs lingering in hyperspace).

Meanwhile Cas’ consciousness is wandering amongst the force. Recovering from his 1v1 with Abaddon, reflecting on his journey thus far and what the future holds now.

Sam gets Jack stable, Cas is still touch and go and Dean is getting more than a touch frantic.

Cas is just, self vs self in the force. Inevitably he recentres himself and defeats his Sith visage. This allows him to properly start healing through ✨the force✨.

Dean keeps vigil over Jack and Cas despite Sam’s concerns, Jack wakes first. Dean introduces himself and does his best ‘your dad is going to be just fine’ talk, despite knowing Jack probably knows more about Cas’ state through the force than he does in that moment. Dean also catches Jack up in the most kid friendly way possible, regaling him with the adventures they went on before they finally found Jack.

Cas wakes for a moment to Jack giggling away at Dean’s stories, he dare not disturb them until one of them notices, he goes back to sleep before they can.

Dean keeps vigil by Cas' side, meanwhile a recovering Jack is exploring the ship and helping out where he can. The brothers also helps him through any trauma that presents itself. BD becomes his new best buddy!

Days later and safely landed and settled on a quiet foresty planet, Cas finally wakes with Dean by his side. They talk quietly, and they eek ever closer to talking about Feelings.

They end up staying on that planet for an age, and eventually Cas says he and Jack need to leave.

Many emotions abounds, Jack doesn't want to go but he knows how they have to live.

Classic 'you should tell him how you feel' talk from Sam for Dean. Classic Dean 'shut up sammy' retort.

It comes to the day Jack and Cas are going to go and -

...

And I don't know how it ends.

(Yet).

Tagging as you all very kindly and politely but ur hands up bless u all

@bendingsignpost @ltleflrt @nasayra @atwistingturningcorridoor @jodyfan-82

[frodo-with-glasses]

More Reading Thoughts: The White Rider

Writing guides: “Don’t repeat information that your audience already knows, because it might bore your readers.” Tolkien: “*Bill Wurtz voice* What if I do anyway ~?”

Personally I enjoy watching Aragorn unravel the riddle of what happened by reading signs on the ground. Every time it’s like “Yes! You almost have it! Ughhh but there’s just one detail you’re missing!”

“‘It is old, very old,’ said the Elf. ‘So old that I almost feel young again, as I have not felt since I journeyed with you children.” Legolas you’ve been acting the most like a child out of everyone in the Fellowship save Pippin, shut your face.

Gimli immediately telling the tree over his head, “I’m not gonna use my axe on you! I promise! Just the creepy old man. Not trees! Don’t hurt me plz”

Guess who’s back…back again…Gandalf’s back…tell a friend!

Now we sit down to tell the long, hilarious tale of how Saruman double-crossed both the good guys AND Mordor in his attempt to be the baddest bad guy on the block.

(Also a quick note: the “peril” from which Boromir escaped clearly wasn’t the danger of the orcs—since they obviously killed him—but apparently the possession of the Ring. I guess you could say his body died, but his soul managed to escape enslavement…)

It cracks me up that so many of the people in Middle Earth are totally unaware of each other and write one another off as legends or children’s stories. In just one conversation, Eomer says “wait, that’s REAL??” like three times: for Galadriel, for hobbits, and for Aragorn’s pedigree. Now we have Gandalf telling the Three Hunters about Ents and Aragorn goes, “Wait, ENTS are real??” Like my dudes, create a postal service or something, keep in touch X’-D

I think it’s a testament to how much fanfiction of Bucky Barnes I’ve both read and written that people in this book can just have a PTSD panic attack in the middle of a conversation and I’m like “yeah that checks out”. First Aragorn at the inn in Bree, and now Gandalf at the mention of the Balrog. Did they even know what PTSD was when Tolkien wrote this? Clearly he did, even if the medical community hadn’t given it name yet.

“To Gimli son of Gloin…give his Lady’s greeting. Lockbearer, wherever thou goest my thought goes with thee. But have a care to lay thine axe to the right tree!” OH. MY. WORD. Galadriel’s message to Gimli was a freakin’ dad joke prophecy about not making that dint in Gandalf’s hat. Darnit, lady, don’t make me like you!

SHADOWFAAAAAAAAAAAAXXX

[lethalchiralium]

ghostin’ | Sam Drake x GN! Reader

a/n: plz tell me if it’s not gender neutral it’s like a decade past my bedtime and i just have fics ready to post. this one’s old lol

inspo: ghostin by ariana grande

warnings: depression, death, cussing, angst

summary: why couldn’t he just let you fucking go?

I know you hear me when I cry

The tears always slowly fall down your cheeks. The memory of soft arms around your chest has been burned into your body, causing more tears to fall. The memory of that sweet man’s smile as he told you he would be back for you, but you would never know if or when.

I try to hold it in the night

When you first met Samuel Drake, a very flirtatious and charming treasure hunter, you were indifferent. He was just a new person who happened to waltz into the museum you worked at and asked you very peculiar questions about the pirate Henry Avery. Weeks of daily visits from him made you consider him a friend, it was very... quaint to have someone interested in your intelligence. After work one night, he took you to a late-night cafe and you learned about him; he had a little brother, he knew a lot about pirates, and he had proper manners. It wasn’t much but he went on about the treasures you spent your life also researching, and it finally felt amazing to have met someone who could hold an intelligent conversation and not be intimidated.

While you're sleepin' next to me, but it's your arms that I need this time

It wasn’t long before he asked you to accompany him and his brother on treasure hunting adventures as their more credible history expert and part-time ass-saver.

It also wasn’t long before you two had that sappy romantic ‘fall-in-love’ moment that you’ve read about your entire life. It was such a sweet moment in a hotel in Ireland when he just kissed you, and then hugged you so tightly like you had just went missing for thirty years.

Look at the cards that we've been dealt

As soon as the search for the lost Crown Jewels of Ireland grew cold, Sam was right back to investigating his leads in Henry Avery again; his brother, Nathan, right on his heels. It was a plane ride home and you were back working in the museum, and it was a few weeks before Sam had even called you.

The day you realized that you loved him was the day that call came, and you weren’t ready.

If you were anybody else, probably wouldn't last a day

“We’re going to Panama.”

That was the day you had an opening exhibit about pirates in your museum, and it was the day Sam walked in in a white button down, nice slacks and shiny shoes. He insisted that you come with, but you said no; real life had gotten in the way and you were just a hair away from receiving a promotion that would allow you to take these long ‘vacations’, but right now you were on thin ice. After your shift ended at 6, Sam took you to a fancy restaurant and that’s where he gave you a ring; a Claddagh ring, to be exact. It wasn’t an engagement ring, it was more of a promise to be loyal to you, if you were to him; the ring he ‘bought’ in Ireland had ‘Love, Loyalty, Friendship’ engraved on the band and that was everything he promised to you.

You wished that you hadn’t taken that ring and that promise, then maybe you wouldn’t be crying yourself to sleep almost every night.

Every tear's a rain parade from hell

When you sleep, he always there in your dreams and wiped away those tears of pain. He always held you closely, trying to calm you. He whispered sweet nothings to remind you that he was there, but you always knew he would never be. You’ve waited fifteen years for any confirmation, but you knew in your heart that the love of your life was dead.

Baby, you do it so well

But this morning, pained tears fell down your face as Nathan spoke over the line, “We have a lead on Avery.”

“No, no.” You whispered as you wiped the baby wipe on your face from last night’s tears, trying to keep the sadness away but it wasn’t working. You were finally the highest paid historian in the museum and you were at the top, your life was going good, you hadn’t thought about Sam for a couple of months; you knew that those years in therapy were finally working. You spent seven years of your life with Sam, it has been hell without him. “No, Nate. I can’t do it.”

You been so understanding, you been so good, and I'm puttin' you through more than one ever should

“Y/N, I’m sorry. But we both made promises, and I’m sure we can finish it.”

You placed the wipe down on your bathroom counter and leaned against it, the streaks of tears you had just wiped away were now close to being replaced. “Why can’t you call Charlie?”

“You know I wouldn’t call just anyone for Avery.”

“Fuck.” You mumbled before you looked yourself in the mirror, seeing that young person who wanted to find that treasure with the best lover you’ve ever had at your side. You couldn’t see anything else.

And I'm hating myself 'cause you don't want to admit that it hurts you

“Um... fuck.” You muttered and looked around, then moved out of your bathroom to your bedroom. “Where are we going?”

“The Rossi Estate in Italy, we’re stealing the Saint Dismas Cross, and this one isn’t broken.” Nate answered as you moved to your closet. “Bring something fancy, I’ll be there in a few.”

“Okay, the front door’s open.” You whimpered as you pushed away those tears.

I know that it breaks your heart when I cry again over him, but I love you, we'll get past this

“Hey, Y/N?”

You sniffled as you started to look through your elegant wear. “Yeah, Nate?”

“You’re not the only one who missed him.”

You smiled at the verbal gesture of comfort. “I’ll be waiting for you.”

Nate hummed in the other line as it clicked, going dead as soon as you selected a sleek dark purple pantsuit that you wore to your very first day as Head Historian; what a damn day. You let the phone drop to the carpet below as you then snatched a couple more shirts and pants for the adventure you were about to go on. Your mind knew how you would feel if you found the treasure without Sam, but your heart knew that it would be better to find it in honor of him.

Though I wish he were here instead, don't want that living in your head

You honestly couldn’t go a day without thinking you saw Sam out of the corner of your eye, and today wasn’t an exception; most days he’s a wanderer in the museum, other days he’s just leaving your sight in your house like he was there with you. But in your dreams?

He just comes to visit me, when I'm dreaming every now and then

He was always in your dreams, even if you haven’t consciously thought about him lately, he was still in your head. Most days he would be sitting under that blue and white striped umbrella on the coast of the Bahamas after you two took a detour from treasure hunting.

And after all that we been through, there's so much to look forward to

You moved out of your closet as you heard as the doorbell rang loudly, and you shouted, “Door’s open, Nate!” You placed the clothes down on your messy bed and sighed, you had to retrieve your old dufflebag from the basement. You moved out of the room, down the small hallway and staircase to the kitchen. The doorbell rang again, you leaned out of the kitchen doorway and looked down the hall towards your front door, only seeing a hint of chestnut brown hair. “It’s open!”

What was done and what was said, leave it all here in this bed with you

You were down in the basement in a blur and it was taking a little time to find that damn dufflebag. Dusty boxes and old trinkets from the small adventures you went on with the Brothers Drake, yet no sign of that deep red dufflebag. You began to open boxes, and that’s when you opened that box on accident.

Baby, you do it so well

That box was full of what Sam’s stuff Nate knew belonged to you. The black bomber jacket he wore in Ireland that still smelled like him, the pictures of him making funny faces and the pictures of you sitting on his shoulders on the beach, smiles brighter than the future you two wanted. The one picture of you in the middle of laughing, your hand over your mouth as a smile cascading on your face. He was always making you smile.

Your shaky hand touched the leather of the jacket and you saw the old knife stashed from the time a mercenary had tried to stab him. You grabbed the jacket and pulled it on, the memories of Sam flooded back but you knew you needed to hurry up; knowing Nate, he probably already called Sully and had plans to be flying out as soon as humanly possible. Nate was your best friend and you knew Sam’s death hurt him just as much as you, maybe worse but you wouldn’t know; he was just like his brother, not one to show negative emotion.

You been so understanding, you been so good, and I'm puttin' you through more than one ever should

You closed the box again and picked up another box next to it, yet you struggled.

“Hey.”

You jumped an inch or two out of your skin when someone spoke and dropped the box on your toe, to which you let out a loud screech. You fell on your ass and pulled your foot close to you, laughing away the pain as you then looked up, only to stop making any sound at all.

About six feet in front of you was what you thought was a ghost, yet his little brother stood next to him. Nate had a smile on his face as Sam had worry in his eyes.

“You okay, baby?”

And I'm hating myself 'cause you don't want to admit that it hurts you, baby

That man had brought you so much pain, so many tears were shed over him for fifteen years and yet the best he could say was that?

He moved closer to you as you burst into tears, he was immediately on his knees yet his hands were hesitant to touch you; all this time in prison, he dreamt of you hugging him to death when he got out, maybe even slapping him for not trying to contact you but never sobbing.

You held the sleeves of the jacket over your eyes, drying up your tears as the smile you had kept getting bigger. You moved the sleeves away and held out your arms, and Sam immediately dove into them.

I know that it breaks your heart when I cry again over him, mmh

A hand in his hair and another on his back as you held him so close to you, the lifetime without him couldn’t be fixed right now but by God was it trying.

“You’re home.”

But I love you.

———

Copyright © 2022 lethalchiralium. All rights reserved.

[thevampatease]

So, about Steve’s appearance…

Ever since the manga version came out, it’s pretty much been the definitive visuals for the characters, whether they match the book descriptions or not.

Basically, I think we’d all rather see Steve as a hulking, scary badass rather than the, uh, VERY different picture the books actually paint:

From Hunters of the Dusk:

Seven were large and muscular. The eighth was slight, dressed in a hood and robes, serving drinks and food to the others. P.170

Drawing a knife, I sent it whizzing at the head of the servant, who wasn’t much bigger than me. P. 182

And from Allies of the Night:

A man of medium height appeared out of the gloom. He was dressed in black, with a long scarf looped around his neck, gloves covering his hands. He had grey hair- though he wasn’t old- and there was a stern set to his features. P. 96

Grabbing Steve by his long grey hair, p. 198

And that’s…it? As far as I remember, those are the only descriptions we get (plz lemme know if I missed something)? Not much but enough to know he ain’t the big bad we see in the manga.

Like I am in no way saying people have to stick to book descriptions or see any character in any specific way, but I do find it funny that we’ve kind of collectively vetoed the original description. Just let this dumbass be a himbo.

Tl;dr, Steve is actually kind of a twink but we’ve collectively decided to let him be the cool hot villain he’s always wanted to be.

Side note: same goes for CREPSLEY’S GODAMN HAIR

[sexiestpodcastcharacter]

Sexiest Podcast Character — Unscripted Bracket — Round 5

Propaganda

Glenn Close (Dungeons & Daddies):

#Propaganda for Glenn Close: one of the other PCs mentions multiple times how hot he is #Actually several characters point it out but especially Henry #Also the only person in a podcast that has to put a disclaimer about not being a BDSM podcast to have had sex during the course of the show

Young hot rocker dilf

Loyal to his dead wife <3

Does in fact smoke weed

BARD!! HES A BARD. HE WAS LEAD GUITAR IN HIS BAND (that he was kicked out of)

His band was a Christmas cover band btw.

Literally the fandom had hot Glenn summer which consisted of drawing him being incredibly hot and sexy

Anti government (ofc)

Kind of cringefail (Disney adult) (was on dilfs of disneyland)

Young and sexy not your style? Then how about HIM AFTER YEARS LOCKED IN A TIME PRISON WITH A DAMN HANNIBAL MASK ??

Lost an eye and wears a fucking eyepatch

One incredibly buff arm

Has a pet rat named after his son <3

Immeasurable amounts of trauma in this man- becomes progressively more unhinged

OH OLD HUMAN BARD ISNT CUTTING IT? FINE

HE BECOMES A FUCKING DEMON

A COOL HOT ONE-EYED DEMON WHO WANTS TO KILL HIS DAD (also sexy)

HE CANONICALLY ENDS CHRISTIAN HELL VIA CHRISTMAS

IS ALSO WAY OVERLEVELED

Becomes a demon hunter for the rest of his existence

Also nonwhite !!! We are done with cringefail whiteboys !!!!!!!!!

I can’t put into words ok just know he is the best plz love him.

Okay but Glenn made a minivan cum by talking to her so

HE HAS A BOOK THAT HE MARKS X’S AND CHECKS FOR EVERY DAY TO SEE IF THAT DAY WAS A SUCCESS OR NOT. TO SEE IF HE DID GOOD THAT DAY. ITS ALMOST ENTIRELY X’S. HE WAS CUCKED OUT OF A SON. AND A DEAD WIFE. HE DIDN’T EVEN GET TO KILL HIS DAD IN REVENGE. There’s absolutely nothing going for him except his sex appeal in his life. Nobody he loved remembers him. He lost his eye. All he has is a pet rat and friends who admit they don’t really like him that much. He was kicked out of his own band. The band was named after him. He was kicked out of the Glenn Close trio. All he could do was deez nuts the big bad and be sexy. If nothing else, then pity him. Look in his eyes. Look at his heart and soul. He did not do the BDSM episode for this I’ll tell you what. Do this for my his sake. Do it for Nick Jr, who needs the prize money to pay for his rat snacks. Do it for his son. For Morgan. Ganbatte.

Glenn is the goofiest sexiest character there is and I will die on this hill! I will ride into battle for him! what Dndads created is truly unique and Glenn is a key part of that and for that he deserves to win. I said it before and I'll say it again - GLENN SWEEEEEP

Can we talk about how he says ‘baby’ casually? Like he just calls people that?? That’s HOT. THAT IS HOT!! He’s also bilingual and knows Japanese!!!! He’s a big dumb idiot with a lot of charisma!!!!!! HE WORKED AT A BDSM PLACE FOR TWO SEPARATE ONE SHOTS. HES SO SAD BUT PLAYS IT OFF LIKE HE’S CHILL ALL THE TIME!! HE DOESN’T THINK OF HIMSELF AS SINGLE BECAUSE HE DIDN’T DIVORCE HIS DEAD WIFE!!! He’s like.. the perfect guy. We need this win.

I’d also like to add the fact I made this. Which is the first 11 episodes edited to (almost) only have Glenn in them <3 which is a level of insanity I hope to reiterate. These took hours to make. I wouldn’t do that for anyone else.

Mod Note: While I will still take "bad dads are sexy" propaganda and "bad dads aren't sexy" anti-propaganda, I kindly request no more discussion on whether or not he was a bad father. This is a sexypoll, not a parentingpoll. If you see a post you strongly disagree with, you can just not reblog it.

Mod Note 2: This tournament is about fictional podcast characters. Please do not vote for the real actress Glenn Close.

Amber Gris (The Adventure Zone: Ethersea):

Middle aged woman who punches sharks to death. My hero

If you love me you'll vote for amber gris I swear to everything holy on earth amen

Amber is butch, instant win

Amber Gris has a negative charisma modifier and she pissed her pants on purpose in order to trick a guard and knock him out. She tied up a dude. She once killed an evil magic shark (they're out for murder. not like real sharks) by punching it and then picked it up and smashed it into another shark, also killing it. She talks in a southern accent. She calls people guppy because it indicates a lack of respect. She has a big pair of magical green arms that come from her stomach. She got a fancy jacket and immediately ripped its sleeves off. She has a gay thing going on with one of the political leaders in the city. She gets in fights with people and doesnt do vulnerability and tries to lay low and not get in any social trouble she doesn't have to. She jumped through a portal into a new world because she could. She's now the god of said world, alone with only afformentioned political leader, who was previously possessed and she had to fight. She spends her time in a bar called the Cloaca. She calls people she doesn't like claspers, because it means shark penis. She and her friend, an old man named Uncle Joshy, sneak attack each other and yell VIBE CHECK! She tries to talk fancy to impress people and she's really bad at it (verily).

She’s everything and more. She’s irreverent. She punches sharks for a living. She becomes God. What more do you need in a butch.

amber gris propaganda: she is straightup the physical embodiment of "women want me, fish fear me." also she's an appalachian post apocalyptic sea captain. that's just objectively cool.

AMBER GRIS IS PUNCHES SHARKS AND IS (one of) THE MOST BADASS BLACK WOMEN PCS IN DND SHOWS IVE EVER SEEN. SHES INCREDIBLE AND A WIN FOR DYKES EVERYWHERE

amber's creator said she was based off of the type of working-class woman you commonly see in appalachia where "this is the sort of woman that you see walking past CVS, and you know that a truck could hit her and it would just split around her as she continued to go pick up whatever she had to do that day." and that's pretty hot

guys Amber becomes lesbian god of the new world with her childhood “”friend””

#amber gris is LITERALLY a middle-aged butch #she would win this entire tournament in a just world

Last time Amber got horny was when she killed that shark

"it was a savage bummer though, don't-- trust me, there's nothing that great about a history. You know? I got one. What did I do, killed a bunch of sharks? Last time I got horny, god and christ I can't even tell you-- well, it was when I killed that shark. But! Hey. We're all just kinda figuring it out."

Moonshine Cybin (Not Another D&D Podcast: Bahumia):

She's a hot elf with mushrooms growing on her. She has 1 level of barbarian. She's bisexual. She shapeshifted into a dragon and ate a god.

how tf does the post not mention Moonshine’s giant boobs her greatest asset

Moonshine has canonically gone down on a woman for a solid hour without asking for anything in return. Moonshine edged a dryad just by kissing them. Moonshine faced down someone being controlled to kill everyone in his path and told him if he still wanted to hurt her, she would take his blows as a friend. Moonshine makes jambalaya for her family and friends. Moonshine mispronounced someone’s name for a month and that woman still wanted to hook up with Moonshine. These are just a few of the reasons why Moonshine is sexy.

shes illiterate

canonically huffs dirty water from a bong

has big tatas

wears a belly chain with a demon trapped in it

almost became the queen of hell

ate a god

turned into a pregnant moose & gave birth

The woman she went down on for an hour asking nothing in return is still hung up on her, 200 years later. Moonshine is unmatched

To be clear the woman whose name Moonshine mispronounced for a month and then hooked up with is the same woman she went down on for an hour, and the same woman who is still flustered over her 200 years later. The rizz is unparalleled. She’s also incredibly kind and accepting of others, and goes out of her way to bolster her friends. The party always requests one big bed.

moonshine cybin is a druid who learned counterspell through sheer force of will. moonshine cybin turned one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse into a dolphin, flew him 60 feet up into the air, dropped him on the ground, and then spit spores into his face to kill him. moonshine cybin turned into a dragon and bit the head off of a double god. moonshine cybin was willing to confine herself to an eternal hell to save the world. moonshine cybin is a dragon rider. you know what you must do.

Amber and Moonshine Together

Look at them. They should not have to fight when they could be gay instead. Imagine the power they would have combined... Every lesbian in a hundred mile radius of the post would swoon. It may be an odd alliance, but from an Ethersea fan to Bahumia fans, i believe this will strengthen both our odds. I have always been insane about Amber Gris but through this poll I have also learned about Moonshine and come to love her too. Take my hand... We can do this together...

OKAY HEAR ME OUT MOONSHINE AND AMBER WOULD GET ALONG SO WELL

appalachian sapphic solidarity!

Art of Amber and Moonshine from @pirateknight.

[hazelcephalopod]

The Eye of the World Ch 23-24

Disclaimer: this is my first read thru but I’ve watched all of the show this far and been spoiled on some book things. So… I’m going to lean into that. Enjoy figuring out what I know, and what I think I know, and what I just don’t. Also s/x I add commentary when I edit.

Spoilers for the first book under the cut. Potential mild spoilers for the entire series. It’s a long one!

Immediate impression: Fleeing continues, in many forms. Revelations occur. Actions of the past cause problems.

Edit- fixed the disclaimer and spoiler blerb.

Ch 23: Wolfbrother

Nah Egwene is right that’s a good idea.

“Leaders in stories never had to put up with that sort of thing.” -(Perrin) on Egwenes insistence they take turns riding Bela [he thinks he’s the leader b/c she let him decide where to go]. To this i say- HAH!

… and also, the world here is so very different. Also probably- You have a storm coming young man.

Food! Obtained thru violence! (aka hunting)

You can! But it’s called channeling not wishing

Lol. Sure she’s never going to mess with the One Power again. Yup. You’ve convinced her

Lol. She’s like a cat that just keeps knocking shit over from his perspective. Good for her!

Lol ‘we’re sick of bread and cheese’ to ‘what we’d give for some bread and cheese!’

Oh shit it’s still fully snowing in some places.

Huh. He’s getting ol’ Balzo dreams. At least he isn’t talking to him. There’s that at least (I later learn it’s still likely real bad)

Or… it’s not people. Not cooking at least

Hmm. Everyone gets there differently

There’s no one… hunter, like outlander types around the Two Rivers? Seems like the place for them honestly. Huh

Lol. This guy has been trailing them two days? I guess he got tired of watching them be so sad

Lol. Bela has the highest stealth

So they found this fur trader ranger forest man. Elyas Machera

“[Elyas’s] eyes were yellow, like bright, polished gold”

Oops. Oof. Glad they found the only person in like hundreds of miles

This world was wrecked huh? Everything is very empty.

Well all of that sounds terrible. (And listen ok I’m going to try not to do this much but like… the Aiel, who look the way they look live in the fucking desert? For 3k years. Are they nocturnal? I… mean… idk. I really don’t. Maybe? Excited to learn more. Ok I’m done. Bone picked.) [follow to learn if I actually let this go. Cuz I didn’t promise]

A hermit more like. Easy mistake

At least give the poor kids some better directions.

‘Course but come on take them to a road. Be a decent human being. Plz? Plz. (I later learn he is!)

I knew he helped them b/c they are sad little babies.

Ironically I fully believe Rand and Mat might have been just too compentant to get help and have ended up in the Wastes. That’s how their luck seems to work. That would have been a funny version of the story

Friends?! Bela does not like that

His friends are wolves! Cool

Hey wait!

Why are they all getting stared at creepily so much?! Huh?!

Oh poor Bela.

I mean wolves can become tame. Sorta. After a while and in… sorta. Right?

Ah yes animal telepathy. Got it

Yea most humans actually enjoy some human company. At least occasionally.

I love Egwenes just hunger for knowing.

Yes. Play to each other’s strengths.

From Saldaea? Why… I hope you know a lot about freaking Saldaea

Lol. Elyas- ‘bullshit’

Hahahah! That wolves know is bs!

Oh shit. Well likely, hopefully, he knows that much because of the wolves.

Yup. Wolf powers

“I don’t hold with Aes Sedai. The Red Ajah… they wanted to gentle me, once. I told them to their faces they were Black Ajah; served the Dark One.” -Elyas. Well, that’s fucking impressive. And he got away, clearly.

Interesting he had to kill Warders. And unfortunate

Wild that this isn’t the Power. Huh

“Old things coming again.”

She’s actually pretty restraint around strangers. Knows how to get what she wants along with the personing to generally.

There’s time yet for them to join in!

Mm yea wonder how… /s

Ohh that’s kinda sweet.

Interesting with the wolves and Trollocs hating each other and wolves coming down from the mountains in Emonds Field.

Holy fuck they can take a Fade?

Yea Egwene is not going to live in the woods with you two and some wolves.

Tbf to her it might actually be deadly with her and the power

Yay! He’s gonna help!

Mm. Yup. That’s not a average person thing bud

Edit- they didn’t die of pneumonia!

Ch 24

So. Many. Bridges.

Read half a paragraph before learning-

Rand POV.

And honestly thought that was kinda cool

Oh. It’s a dream. That tracks. Many bridge’s = dream

Huh. I don’t recall ever smelling anything in my dreams

More damn being watched

This is just some inception shit. What is the origin of that? This dream fuckery; did inception get its thing from this or this from something else?

“The only thing to do was… was to keep moving. Keep moving, and not think. Thinking was dangerous, he knew.” -Rand in a dream

So… based on everything so far ol’ Balzo seems to find it easier to find them the more people they are around? That’s my guess. No idea why that would be but it’s what I got. Possibly because he need to know their location to catch them?

Don’t think this is just a dream

You think. You freeze. That’s terrifying.

Once again the horror writer emerges

I would not be pleasant to be around either if I had these dreams even once a week.

“His heel had overturned one of the smooth stones, kicked it out of the dry ground. He stared at it, and empty eye sockets stared back. A skull. A human skull. He looked along the path at all the smooth, pale stones, all exactly alike. He shifted his feet hastily, but he could not move without walking on them, and he could not stand still without standing on them. A stray thought took vague shape, that things might not be what they seemed, but he pushed it down ruthlessly. Thinking was dangerous.” -Rand in the horrible hellish nightmare place of his dreams.

No. Turning the same direction didn’t work! It led to Balzo. Not good!

“…the Eye of the world will not serve you… I will strangle you with the corpse of the Great Serpant!” -Ba’alzamon- ol’ Balzo to Rand. Sir, that seems like a bit much

I just keep wanting to put in more quotes because it is so good.

Like… there is just no good choice here. He got rid of Balzo and then is faced by thousands of mirrors pointed at him, and empty darkness besides. Horrifying.

“He wanted to scream, but his throat was frozen. There was only one face in those endless mirrors. His own face. Ba’alzamon’s face. One face.” (Couldn’t resist) and with that the dream ends.

Yay…

Oh no he’s bleeding from that dream? Yikes.

Tbf he was supposed to be on watch

Still might be a Problem

Yup. Ride em to hard and mutiny will follow

He’s so earnest. Even when sad

“…the stone had been cut into figures, men and women a hundred feet tall… long years separated the first from the last. Wind and rain had worn those at the north end smooth and almost featureless, with faces becoming more distinct as they went south.” -the statues carved into the cliffs along the Arinelle River. Things lost to history huh? I like it.

Oh strange shinny metal towers with no openings. And no explaination. Always a good sign /s

“On Tremalking… there be a a stone hand [50 ft] high sticking out of a hill, clutching a crystal sphere as big as this vessel.” -Cap Domon to Rand about the oddities of the world. Uh think that treasure may consist of a statue yea? (There’s allegedly treasure under it)

Sea Folk only caring about finding their Chosen One huh? Coramoor?

I’m sorry? Dinosaurs? Are those fucking dinosaur bones in… Tanchico?

Rand… you woolheaded earnest baby. ‘Well all that’s [magic, ruins, wonders of the world] nice I guess. But we found a giant fish skeleton at home once’

Honestly the world does not seem to be catching Rand without a serious fight

He really is just Samwise kinda. Which imo. Is great.

Lol. Mats going to get caught for sure. Time will tell if he’ll even want to go home

… also seems a bit fixated on treasure huh? Creepily so

I don’t like that he’s laughing into the wind. I dunno why but I don’t

Ok. People watching, less concerned now

Just looking down at the world and feeling the wind. That’s seems notable…

Ok now he’s just Titanic posing. Hilarious. And dangerous on top of a mast.

Dude. You almost died and now you’re laughing. Listen to Thom and get the hell down.

Risky behavior there.

Oh. And not noticing everyone shouting at him. Great. /s

I’m glad the crew had fun with that. I’m concerned (don’t think I don’t remember what Moiraine told Nynaeve a few chapters back!)

Oh nice… dagger there Mat. Mhm

Oh noo

Chapter ends with a bang-

“Rand’s gaze drifted to the top of the mast, and he shivered. ‘What’s happening to me? Light, what?’ He had to find out. He had to get to Tar Valon before he really did go mad.”

[foilfreak]

Beauty and Her Beast: Chapter 5

WARNING PLZ READ BEFORE CONTINUING: This fic is rated NSFW and contains graphic depictions of things some people may find disturbing or alarming, including, but not limited to: violence, gore, unhealthy family relationships, Oedipus complexes, gratuitous amount of pornographic literature, ableist language, physical, mental, and emotional abuse, etc. If you are someone who does not enjoy fiction with these elements in them, then I suggest you refrain from reading this, because this fic will have all that, and probably a lot more. So, this is your first and final warning to turn around and go somewhere else if stuff like this just isn't your vibe, because from this point forward, your emotional wellbeing is in your own hands, and I will not be accepting blame if you disregarded my warnings and ended up reading something you didn't like. Idk why I feel compelled to write one of these despite this being Resident Evil fanfic, but I figured I'd cover my ass just in case.

(AO3 Link below)

This was a bad idea... no, actually, scratch that. This wasn’t just a bad idea...

‘THIS WAS A TERRIBLE IDEA’ Salvatore thought to himself, as he frantically hid beneath a large blue tarp covering a couple of old, rotting shipping crates, his body trembling uncontrollably and his shoulders heaving from the terrified and panicked state Salvatore had managed to work himself into.

Now, for those of you who may be wondering why Salvatore was currently hiding behind a bunch of crates like prey hiding from the hunter, despite being in the safety of his own reservoir-

“Hello?”

-that would be why.

Yes, the 2 days that Salvatore had been given to prepare for his gift’s arrival had come and gone faster than the disfigured man could have ever imagined. And while he’d done a marvelous job of cleaning up the reservoir to make it suitable for the beautiful young lady who’d now be calling this place ‘home’, what he hadn’t anticipated having to deal with was the full blown panic attack he got the second the villagers arrived to release her into his custody. Thankfully, his anxiety grew more manageable when one of the villagers explained that, due to Nadine’s tendency toward violent behavior, combined with her superhuman strength, Mother Miranda had gone ahead and given the young woman a nice heavy dose of sedative to keep her asleep throughout the journey to the reservoir, as well as for a couple of hours afterwards, too.

You know… just in case.

After the villagers finally left, Salvatore closed and locked the gate behind them before turning his attention to the large wooden coffin that, according to the men who’d carried it here, contained his long awaited gift from Mother Miranda.

Taking a few tentative steps forward, Salvatore takes the metal key the villagers had given him and slowly, but eagerly, unlocked and opened the wooden vessel, gasping in shock and awe as the sight of Nadine’s perfectly angelic face finally came into the light. He wasn’t sure how this was possible, but somehow the young woman looked even more perfect than the first time he saw her, the soft glow of the early morning sun reflecting off her blue scaly skin in a way that gives her a gorgeous, almost iridescent shine.

The continued nudeness of Nadine’s body, while mesmerizing to look at, did unfortunately make the act of keeping his hands to himself rather difficult, and Salvatore quickly found himself grappling with his inner demons as he contemplated reaching in and taking a quick feel, just a quick one, if only for the sake of finally figuring out what on earth her skin was made out of.

Was it smooth and silky to allow for rapid aquatic maneuverability, like that of an eel, or did her soft, feminine exterior hide a rougher, more textured sort of skin, like that of a shark or a whale?

Oh how Salvatore longed, with every fiber of his disgusting, twisted being, to reach inside that wooden carrier and run his hands over the mutant woman’s perfect little body, every atom in him aching to touch, hold, kiss, lick, bite, and devour every square millimeter of this gorgeous specimen, blurring and melting the lines of reality that once separated them until you couldn’t tell where beast ended and where beauty began.

But he refrained.

As much as Salvatore desperately wanted to give in to the primal desires of his still-human mind and mostly-human body, he instead decided to give the young woman some time to wake up first, guessing that she probably wouldn’t want some random stranger, much less one that looks like him, touching her without her permission. So with a deep breath, and a strong swallowing of his raging libido, Salvatore stepped away from the crate Nadine was sleeping in, pocketing the key in case Mother wanted it back later, before turning around and beginning to hobble back toward the lake to complete the few minor tasks he hadn’t managed to get to before the villagers arrived earlier.

It would be well into the afternoon, nearly evening by this point, before Salvatore heard so much as a peep from Nadine. Mother Miranda must not have been kidding when she said she’d given the young woman enough sedative to knock her out for hours. If it weren’t for the fact that she was still breathing, Salvatore might have thought her dead after this amount of time.

Unfortunately for Salvatore, it would appear as though Nadine taking ages to awaken from her drug induced slumber would be the least of the deformed man’s concerns, quickly overrun and forgotten about in the blind panic Salvatore went into once the young woman’s voice, soft and slightly high pitched, though a bit scratchy from lack of use, calls out from, presumably, the spot where Salvatore had left her by the front gate.

The heavenly tone bounces and echoes off the wood and water of the surrounding area, filling the reservoir with a song-like magic that made Salvatore’s knees buckle weakly in reverence, and his stomach want to turn itself inside out from complete and utter terror. Hit with the sudden realization that Salvatore was going to have to actually look at AND speak to Nadine now that she’d awoken, and at the same time no less, immediately sends the mutant man tumbling into a full blown panic, resulting in Salvatore locating the nearest solid structure, the tarp and crates in this case, and throwing himself underneath it, hoping and praying that if he remained quiet for long enough, Nadine would lose interest and go somewhere else-

“Hello? Is anyone here?”

-Unfortunately Salvatore wasn’t a man who had his hopes and prayers answered terribly often, and today seemed to be no different than usual.

Despite being given extra security due to the rapid approach of nightfall, Salvatore didn’t even dare breathe as the sound of footsteps passed by his hiding spot, his heart pounding uncontrollably in his chest as Nadine came within just inches of finding him. This is it, the jig is up, there was absolutely no doubt in Salvatore’s mind that Nadine was mere seconds away from pulling the tarp back to reveal his horrible and disgusting self, scrunched up into the tightest little ball between the narrow spaces of the crates.

Closing his teary eyes and accepting his fate, Salvatore merely sat and waited for the inevitable moment of shocked silence after the tarp had been lifted, followed by the sound of Nadine’s smooth and rich voice bursting his eardrums with a piercingly shrill and terrified shriek, as well the heavy booming of feet against wood as she ran away from him, disgusted, horrified, and appalled by so much as having to look at the monster that Salvatore was, much less do anything else.

“Ah man, I could have sworn I saw someone around here, earlier,” the low but feminine voice of Nadine said aloud, sounding quite dejected as she leaned against the blue tarp covering Salvatore’s hiding spot.

“Maybe they just went out to look for food, and will be back later?” Nadine says to herself, sounding more optimistic than before, though her hopefulness fades as quickly as it arrived when she continues with, “Then again… maybe the poor bastard caught a glimpse of me as I stumbled around and took off in terror at the sight of me. I suppose I can't really blame him… not with the way I look now, at least.”

Nadine pauses, trailing off for a moment as Salvatore remains rooted in his spot, hands clamped firmly over his mouth and nose to prevent any noise from escaping, despite the increasing burning sensation from his human lungs, which, despite their somewhat shaky ability to do their prescribed role ever since the cadou mutations screwed him up, still very much needed air going in and out of them if Salvatore wanted them to continue functioning at all.

The young woman remained in that spot leaning against the tarp-covered crates for a few more moments, not saying or doing anything as far as Salvatore could tell, before the sound of shuffling and more footsteps, softer and less hurried than the ones he’d heard earlier, caught his attention.

Silence persists for another moment, causing Salvatore to grow curious the longer he waits. And so, despite his earlier reservations, Salvatore can’t help but shift his position slightly so that he could peek through a narrow space between the wall of crates, just enough to give him a solid view of Nadine, who currently stood with her back to him just a few feet away from where the mutated man was hiding. Her gaze seemed transfixed on the lake’s surface, or perhaps it was less the water that held her gaze, but the reflection staring back at her from the mirror-like surface.

Even without seeing her face, Salvatore could tell that the young woman was afraid and in pain, and his heart wrenched agonizingly as he watched her beautiful form shrink in on itself. Her arms curled around her body defensively, as if trying to hide herself shamefully from any potential onlookers, while her torso slumped limply forward, shoulders shaking heavily as she sobbed quietly to herself in the ever growing darkness of evening time.

“Whatever, it’s not like it matters anyways,” the young woman sobs dejectedly after a while, pointlessly rubbing the tears from her face away, only for them to be quickly replaced as new ones fell. “Even if somebody did actually live here, it’s not like anyone would even want to help a disgusting abomination like me... much less have anything else to do with me.”

The sound of Nadine jumping off the dock and into the cold lake water below pales in comparison to the sound of Salvatore’s whole world turning itself upside down from beneath the large blue tarp under which he was hidden.

Disgusting abomination?

Nadine?

No. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, NO!

Of all the things Salvatore has ever heard in his entire life, this one has to be the most ridiculous thing by far.

Salvatore was a disgusting abomination, that much he was more than aware of and had long since accepted, as painful as it still was to admit from time to time. But Nadine… Why Nadine was quite easily the most beautiful woman he’s ever laid eyes on, save for perhaps Mother Miranda herself maybe, which was certainly a very high standard to be compared to in Salvatore’s book. While the young woman did indeed have several mutations that would make going back to her previous life almost impossible, that didn’t mean she was disgusting, or an abomination.

Not to Salvatore she wasn’t, at least.

The fact that the poor young woman thought this of herself sent a sharp, stabbing pain directly into his heart, practically tearing him apart from the inside out as he frantically thought of something, anything he could do to make the tiny woman feel better.

Thinking back to when he’d watched her just moments ago, he remembers the way in which her arms and hands curled around herself as she sobbed, looking like they were attempting to cover as much exposed skin as physically possible. How Nadine could call herself an abomination when she looked like the picture perfect definition of beauty, Salvatore didn’t know, but what he did know was that women, at least the women he was used to, always enjoyed receiving pretty things with which they could cover and decorate themselves, like dresses and jewelry.

And luckily for Salvatore, he just so happens to know of a few places where he might be able to acquire both of those things.

With a quick peek from beneath the tarp before taking off, Salvatore quickly makes his way toward the exit gate, barely managing to close the gate behind him and pull his cloak over himself before sprinting, as much as his mangled body would allow anyways, down the snowy path that would lead him to the estates of the only two people Salvatore can think of to help him in this messy situation.

Hopefully Alcina and Donna won’t be terribly upset with him for stopping by unannounced.

[light-miracles]

AoS season 5 reactions

Or how to ruin a show that until then was being flawlessly written.

Going by chronological order with @shieldagent93 having to stand my rants...

~In 5x01, two of the three sentences said by Jemma had the word "Fitz". It's too much. It's like if she's always thinking about him.

~I... What's happening?? When do they explain what's going on?

~I don't like this Deke guy.

~5x05 was great. It explained a lot of the doubts I had. Also seeing Hunter again was amazing.

~What the fuck are they doing shooting at a fuckin quinjet wtf.

~5x08 has me like "how does time travel works in Marvel?". Like... They're in the future but they also raised Robin. Guess it's a Marvel thing. Also i would really like Fitz a little more if he had a better control of his outburst. I know, he's frustrated, but I guess screaming angry men just trigger me... And he has an ugly as fuck beard now. Anyway, May looks younger every season. The woman grows old in reverse.

~Done with 5x10. My Elena feelings are hurting. Also someone in the writing room as an amputation kink... Honestly this season is being the least cool (which is still better than what I'm used but, still). The dystopan society and everything related feels clumsy.

~You gotta be freakin kidding me her arms actually got chopped off?? Also, bad Susan Vásquez, bad. Alex Danvers would be disappointed

~"Losing a life is better than two" "This is not Hydra, Leopold!" Like, fuckin literally, Leopold!

~... There was an Hydra high school??? How did they remain undercover for 70 years, again?... I mean, they literally have an Hydra high school uniform... The person who washes their clothes might, idk, GUESS it's an Hydra high school.

~5x14... What the fuck did i just watch. Yeah, fuck FitzSimmons. Fuck Fitz. The fuck with Simmons. And I guess you won't catch me talking about Skimmons for a while. Wtf.

~Note to myself: Dessica never exaggerates. When she says something is bad, it's bad.

~Also, funny how Fitz apparently was talking to his evil self for weeks and no one noticed anything different about him. Jemma didn't notice anything different about him. So either that was bad writing or the dude is truly a psycho and not worse than Ward.

~5x15 has me like 'why no one is angry at Fitz?' He didn't steal someone's cookie he fuckin cut into Daisy??? Why don't they let Jemma be angry at him?? Since when all Jemma cares is only him??... I miss the Jemma of the past seasons.

~Deke: 'I respect you for what you did'

Is this... Is this for real???

~Deke: Daisy is a pain in the ass

FitzSimmons: I noticed.

Me: ENOUGH OF THIS BULL-

~ Jemma: "Fitz is paying for thinking differently"

*internally screaming *

~You know, this is worse than Supergirl's s5. Because the bullshit was said mostly by the fans, not the actual characters.

~"Maybe that they chopped your arms off wasn't so bad"... Are they trying to make me hate him?... Who wrote this?

~

Pffffffffffffffff LMAO!!!! He's fuckin cosplaying Khan from Star Trek...

~Plz let this season end.

~... Did i just hear the phrase 'Fitz is an incredible person' coming out of Daisy's mouth-i can't believe it

~Andddd Talbot just killed Brainiac 5.

~Jemma "torturing Daisy is okay but I draw the line at using an old corpse to create a cure to save Coulson's life" Simmons... Daisy literally hijacked her mother's corpse and it's not even the weirder thing about this season.

~Poor Jiaying. Like, yeah, she tried to kill Daisy but she was bananas at the moment and everything was Hydra's fault so...(Just like ANOTHER scientist restrained ANOTHER defenseless asian girl because he thought FUCKIN CUTTING INTO HER was for the GREATER GOOD) (I WONDER WHO MIGHT THAT BE)

~Okay but this evil alien villian is literally just a black man. No pointy ears. No weird eyes. No sharp teeth. Not even ants. Just a black man. Black men must look alien enough to whoever created this character

~Fitz: We can't break the time loop

Jemma: Okay Fitz ❤️

Fitz: I changed my mind I think we must make sure we break it

Jemma: Okay Fitz ❤️

This woman hasn't had a single personal thought in 15 episodes

~ Philindaisy's shoulders must hurt from carrying the weight of the season. Mack is honestly the only survivor of this team. I don't know any person called Finn or Simona or whoever. Neither their grandson Dick the Dick. And Elena is on thin, thin ice. I can still understand her pov and see why she does what she does. That's why she's on thin ice instead of on the bottom of the ocean like Fido and Simpsons.

~"I'm the savior of the world" said he, as he crashed his ship against a fuckin city. Homeboy at least be a coherent villian ffs-He's making the jesuchrist pose. Talbot, honey I'm so sorry.

~... So is Fitz dead?? I don't get it. Is he dead?? Why is everyone talking like if he were sleeping? What happened? I can't believe this show broke the curse of the 4th season just to invent the curse of the 5th.

You know the worst thing of this season?? That Daisy did everything in her power to protect Jemma from Papa Smurf and some episodes after it Jemma fuckin says it was right to hurt Daisy. Homegirl, that's a shit friend. Someone introduce her to Lena Luthor.

[old-crabapple-mckinley]

unfocused reaction to wot 10: crossroads of twilight

hoo boy.

so like, nothing happened. it kinda sucked, full stop. this probably could have been about a fourth of a better paced book tbh. this felt like a huge waste of time. it was the worst of the bunch by far!

the good

i think the best plot by far was alviarin & the white tower. because there's actual tension! there are stakes because we knew mesaana was in the tower, we hate elaida but know she's not a darkfriend so we have to be on her side, and the black hunters are getting results! And then the chapter where alviarin sees mesaana get got by the dark one? so so good! so many good spinning plates here.

the salidar tower voting to ask ashaman help was good, and the idea that shadar logoth was destroyed by forsaken is a cool misunderstanding! (but with the power of traveling or TAR, this could easily be rectified, but thats another issue.) side note: man it seems like robert jordan wants to pick on sheriam all the time. it seems like he's mean to her!

the bad, and there's a lot:

like the 1st half of the book was just people reacting to rand and nynaeve cleansing saidin, which is neat that it was felt around the world, but damn it took up a hell of a lot of time

rand is dumb for creating an unstable army wielding an incredibly destructive force, giving it to a power hungry warlord with no supervision, then getting rid of the only drawback on their use of said destructive force. like dude. check in once a week or something, jesus. nothing was ever stopping the ashaman from being a legit organization attached to the dragon reborn, so i dont know what the thought of freewheeling so hard was there. perhaps there was none. the black tower isn't fun to read.

(i can deffo see some sinister implications about the black tower and i dont like it, "im super strong at magic and i can use a sword, and all the women aren't as powerful as my magic, and if i kiss them they get bonded to me and i can have sex with them". a bunch of yikes at that crazy male power fantasy.)

what even happened with elayne? nothing interesting. gathering houses for the throne. everything with her is tedious and it's plain she's gonna be queen so there feels like there arent any stakes. also bullshit pregnancy plot is bad and handled bad. but she took the bath so i get that meme now.

i was under the impression a couple books ago that egwene's army was gonna siege tar valon and that would have been dope as hell! but she just kinda hung out outside the city and negotiations have only just opened up. i wish there was more conflict or anything that shows something was happening. there are a bunch of loose threads in eggy's camp right now and not enough focus has been dedicated to make any of them strong (saidin murder, cuendillar factory, attacking the tower, negotiation with the tower, etc)

release perrin from this storyline plz. berelain is more interesting than the story gives her credit for. "the dead have risen in this town" sounds like a fuckin sidequest if i ever head one

im not charmed by mat the way other people are, and his dynamic with tuon at this point isn't doing anything for me. mat's reliance on in-universe adages about women/gender stereotypes and him being surprised when they backfire has always bugged me (give this man some brains!!!), and him stumbling into courting tuon is another boring use of this (at this point) super overused device.

as a side note, they could have used thom as the way to hook up with valen luca since he and juilin were there in the fires of heaven. not that i care too much about thom, but he has been hardcore sidelined and it seems odd to me that noal has been added as yet another old man mat is friends with. as far as i can tell, thom could easily fill in whatever role noal is playing. juilen has really become useless too. i liked him in book 3. but now he's just another name i have to remember at this point. which bums me out.

im fuckin ready for this knife to kill me in my dreams y'all.

[mersuperwholocked-lowlife]

Only Temporary

Word Count: 3,289

Characters: Dean Winchester, Sam Winchester, Reader, OC Characters

Pairings: Dean Winchester x Platonic!Reader; Sam Winchester x Platonic!Reader

Warnings: angst, some fluff at the beginning, death; TW: slight panic attack

A/N: okay writing with writer’s block and just writing in general is giving me way more anxiety than before cuz I already know it’s not good but I haven’t posted any content in so long and i feel really really bad, and i know its really long but I just could NOT tie it up n e wayz here it is sorry don’t h8 me plz

Masterlist

You pressed your hand against your stomach, over your bleeding wound as you bit your lip, holding in your cries. You whimpered softly, hearing footsteps, hearing footsteps as clutched your gun tightly, pushing yourself up.

You only counted one vampire, a maximum of two. You never expected a full nest, which surprised you when you first made your plan.

You bent over, holding yourself up as you cocked your gun, shooting at the man who walked in front of you.

“What the hell?!” you heard him yell, watching the bullet go just past his head, hitting the wall behind him.

Damn it

You could see everything getting distorted as the two men ran into the room, both pointing their guns at you.

“Drop your guns,” you pointed your gun at one of them.

“Dean, she’s bleeding,” Sam whispered.

“I said drop them!” you raised your voice, pushing yourself up as your bloodied hand gripped your gun.

“Look, we’re here to help, okay?” Sam started, putting his hands up as he put the gun down next to him, motioning to Dean.

Dean looked at you, then at Sam before nodding, putting his gun down.

You could hear your ears ringing as you scrunched your eyes, falling against the wall next to you.

“You’re gonna bleed out,” Dean said.

“Let us get you help,” Sam gave you a worried expression, as he took a step forward.

“How do I know I can trust you?” you clenched your jaw.

“Either you trust us or you die,” Dean replied.

You could see your vision blurring as your gun slipped through your fingers. 

Sam immediately ran to you, before you collapsed.

“You’re bleeding a lot,” Sam pointed out.

“No shit, Sherlock. You’re not that bright, are you…” your voice faded as you closed your eyes, your body going limp. 

---

You gasped loudly, jumping up in your bed, startled as you looked around the room. You scrunched your eyes, trying to remember what happened, and where you were.

You found yourself laying on a bed, in a dark, empty room. You stood up, wincing softly, looking down at your stomach, which was covered in bandages.

You grabbed your knife out of your pocket, slowly walking out of the room.

“Who are you guys?” they both looked up, tending slightly as Sam stood up.

“We’re hunters. I’m Sam, and this is my brother, Dean,” he explained.

“Where are we?” you asked.

“A bunker. We live here,” Dean said.

You put your knife back into your pocket, taking a few steps forward.

“Thanks for helping me,” you said.

“(Y/N),” you shook Sam’s hand as you gave him a quick smile.

“Nice to meet you. So, what were you hunting, exactly,” Sam motioned for you to sit in a chair next to him as you nodded.

“Vampires. I thought there were only two, maybe three, but there was a whole nest. And if memory serves, there should only be four left,” you explained.

“Wait, what? That means… how did you go against all of them?” Dean frowned as he turned to you.

“Uhm, I cut their heads off? Look, I gotta get going,” you started.

“Do you need help?” Sam asked.

“Nope,” your voice drifted off as you got a phone call, your face dropping.

“One minute,” you got up from your seat, walking away as you answered it.

“Don’t even think about it,” Sam immediately whisper-yelled, turning to Dean.

“What?!” he whispered back.

“Don't even think about eavesdropping,” Sam said.

“I wasn't going to,” he rolled his eyes.

---

“What the hell? What’s the one rule I have? Don’t call me,” you raised your voice slightly.

“I’m sorry, you haven't called for two days and I was getting worried,” your brother's voice wavered as he spoke.

“I’m sorry, kid, something happened. I’ll see you in a few hours,” you said, crossing your arms.

“Okay, I’ll see you later,” he replied as you hung up the phone. 

You ran your fingers through your hair, sighing as you shook your head. Your parents died when you were only 15, leading you into a life with hunting, and taking care of your younger brother, who was only five at the time.

You tried your hardest to keep him safe, meaning keeping him far away at any hotel room you could find. His current home was a hotel in Kansas, seeing that wasn't too far from where you were currently. You felt slight guilt, leaving a 13-year-old on his own, but you made sure to check with him whenever you could.

“Is everything okay?” Dean asked, walking up to you.

“Yeah. Uhm, thanks for all of this, but I have to get going now,” you gave Dean a small smile, about to walk away before he called for you once again.

“Wait, so are you just gonna go after them alone?” Dean asked.

You raised an eyebrow, before nodding.

“Yeah, that’s the plan,” you replied sarcastically.

“Well, if you need backup,” he started.

“I don’t typically work with other hunters,” you interrupted him.

“Neither do we. If you need any help or anything, here are our numbers,” he handed you a sheet of paper before you hesitantly took it.

“Thanks, it was nice to meet you,” you waved to the two of them before leaving.

---

“Jackson? I’m home!” you called out, walking into the hotel room.

Before you had the chance to flip the lights on, he ran to you, wrapping his arms around you tightly as he buried his neck in your arm.

“Hey, I missed you too,” you smiled softly, ruffling his hair.

“Look, I’m almost your height,” he looked up at you.

“In your dreams, kid. Come on, how was this week of school?” you asked, walking with him as the two of you sat down on the small table in the room.

“Same as usual. I hate being the new kid all the time, got bullied a little. Oh, and I made a friend,” he exclaimed.

“A friend? Interesting. By the way, if someone messes with you, just flash them your knife,” you kicked your feet up on the table as you laid back into the chair.

“Uh, no. I’m too scared to do that. That’s how I got my friend, by the way. They picked up my knife after it fell out of my pocket. They were surprisingly chill with it,” he replied.

“Huh,” you shrugged.

“Also, (Y/N), I finished all my homework, so can we watch a movie or something?” he asked.

You looked at the time before sighing, it was only 8. Fine, but, we’re not watching The Untouchables again, okay?” you raised an eyebrow.

“Fine, can we watch Tombstone?” he asked.

“How did you watch that?! It’s rated R!” you scolded.

“It was playing one night,” he shrugged.

You playfully wrapped your arm around his neck, dragging him to the bed as you ran your fingers through his hair, playing with it.

Your brother struggled with anxiety, and you tried to do whatever you could to help him or keep him safe. He felt most at peace when you would play with his hair while he laid his head in your lap.

“I missed you a lot,” his voice was barely above a whisper.

“Yeah, I missed you too, kid,” you sighed.

“I wish things were different,” he looked up at you.

“They will be. This is only-” you started.

“Only temporary, yeah, I know,” Jackson finished your sentence.

You kissed his forehead softly. 

“Come on, smart ass, let’s watch.”

---

“Okay, I’ll try to call you when I can. Remember, don’t be dumb. Bye,” you hung up the call from your brother, putting your phone in your bag.

It had been a week since your encounter with the Winchesters, and just like you’d expect, there was another murder, a woman found with her throat ripped out. It was still in Kansas, 3 hours from your hotel room. 

“Hey, I’m Agent-” you began.

“Agent Willis, I’m aware, your partners are waiting for you inside,” you frowned, tensing up as you rested your hand on your gun, staying alert as the officer led you in, only to see Sam and Dean in front of you.

You let go of your gun, tensing up as you clenched your jaw.

“Agents, I wasn’t expecting to see you two here,” you controlled your glare at them, not wanting to make a scene.

“Yeah, well, the director sent us to meet you here,”  Dean quickly lied.

He stood next to you, whispering.

“Don’t cause a scene,” he said,

“I told you I didn’t need any help,” you smiled, whispering to him from the corner of your mouth.

“Well, I’ll leave you three alone,” the officer walked away from the body, as you turned to Sam and Dean.

“Hijacking my hunt? Seriously?” you glared,

“What? Dean told me you called and asked for help,” Sam frowned, as the two of you turned to Dean.

“I didn’t feel good about you doing this alone,” Dean said.

“I’ve been hunting alone for as long as I can remember, I am fine,” you snapped.

“I’m sorry about Dean’s action. Maybe we’ll just leave,” Sam said.

“Well, now it’s too late. If you two leave now, it’ll look suspicious to the entire department. As much as I hate you, you have to stay and help me,” you rolled your eyes.

Sam’s face dropped slightly, feeling guilty, while Dean tried to hide his joy.

After being almost left for dead by hunters one too many times, you decided you would rather stay on your own. It was also better and safer for Jackson. The fewer people that knew him or knew about him, the less danger he was in. 

“You with us?” Dean snapped his fingers in your face as you rolled your eyes.

“Don’t do that ever again,” you glared at Dean.

This was going to be fun

---

“That’s what I call a successful hunt. You’re a great shot, kid,” Dean wrapped his arm around your shoulder, the three of you entering a diner.

You smiled softly, slightly annoyed but dealing with it. The Winchesters were unlike any hunters you'd ever met, they were empathetic, they weren't just machines. They began to grow on you. 

You sat down in the booth in front of Sam and Dean, while Dean quickly grabbed the menu.

“How long have you been hunting anyway?” Sam asked.

“Ehhhh, 8 years? Give or take some time,” you shrugged.

“8 years?! I thought you were in your 20’s,” Dean raised an eyebrow.

“My parents died when I was younger. It was a kitsune,” you replied.

“Oh, I’m sorry about that,” Dean’s face dropped slightly.

“Well, I’m fine, I mean it was a long time ago anyway,” you shook your head.

“So you’re just on your own?” Sam asked softly.

“Well, yeah,” you started.

Well, no

“But honestly I prefer being on my own anyway,” you said.

“Well, if you ever need any help or anything at all, don’t be shy to reach out to us.”

Your mind began to race to all the negative outcomes of what could happen if you let people in. You simply nodded your head, keeping your thoughts to yourself. You kept thinking about Jackson, trying to make sure he’d be safe. That was your only priority, to keep him safe.

The three of you went back to eating fries, laughing, and celebrating together before you made your way back to the hotel.

---

Over the course of the next few months, you found yourself getting closer and closer with the Winchesters. You felt slightly bad about lying to them about your brother, but from what you gathered, anyone close to them was in danger, which included yourself. They invited you to live with them multiple times, while you shot them down every single time, thinking about Jackson. 

One day he would have to meet them, and they would have to meet him, but that day wasn't going to come soon. Dean reminded you of Jackson a lot, having many similar traits. 

You walked into the hotel room, noticing all the lights off as you raised an eyebrow, looking at the time. It was midnight. He was probably asleep.

You walked to the bed, noticing it was empty as you tensed up.

“Jackson?” you called, feeling panic growing in your chest.

“Jackson,” you flipped on the lights, running to the bathroom to look for him, only to find it empty.

“Jackson!” you yelled.

You ran outside, getting into your car quickly as you dialed his number one more time. There were only a few places he would go, and you intended on finding him, no matter what.

---

It’s been over a day since you got back, still receiving no phone call from him, still unable to find him. You went to his school, asking people around, you went to the library, asking anyone if they’d seen him in the last two days. 

No one had.

You could feel your heart aching, as you closed your eyes, biting your lip as you held in a cry. You sat in your car, rubbing your fingers through your hair, trying to rack up any place he would possibly be.

You jumped slightly, hearing someone knocking at the window before furrowing your eyes, seeing Dean standing at the window.

You got out of the car, wiping your eyes as you looked at him.

“H-Hey, I didn't know you were in town,” you said.

“Yeah, are you working the case here too?” he asked.

“C-Case? What case?” you tensed up.

“The kitsune case? Are you okay? You don’t look too well,” Dean frowned, as he put his hand on your shoulder.

“I need to tell you and Sam something,” your voice wavered as your eyes watered once more, looking up at Dean.

“O-Okay, come with me then.”

---

“I’m so, so sorry I didn't tell you guys before. I-I just thought the fewer people who knew about him, the safer he would be, b-but now I-I can’t,” you stopped yourself, letting out a shaky breath as you rested your head in your hands, trying to keep yourself from breaking in front of Sam and Dean.

“Hey, it’s okay. We’ll find him, (Y/N),” Sam held your shaking hand, squeezing it gently.

“He’s all I have left,” your voice was barely above a whisper.

“Well, what can you tell us that can help?” Dean asked, sitting in front of you.

“I don’t know. I looked everywhere he goes, and he wasn’t there… wait, Dean. Y-You said there was a kitsune case in town?” your heart stopped slightly.

“Yeah…”

“What if it’s the same kitsune that killed my parents? I-I was never… I could never track her down. W-What if she’s back for him? What if she kills him?” you began to breathe heavily, your vision blurring as you looked to the floor.

“(Y/N),” Dean started, frowning slightly as he gave you a look.

You could feel your chest tightening as you squeezed Sam’s hand tightly, your body shaking. You let go of Sam’s hand, holding your head in your hands as you clenched your jaw, closing your eyes.

“(Y/N)? What is it? What’s wrong?” Sam looked at you worriedly.

“I-I don’t know…” your voice faded out as you inhaled deeply, finding it hard to do so.

“I think you’re having a panic attack. (Y/N), you need to breathe,” Dean squatted down, looking at you softly.

“I-I’m trying,” you wheezed, feeling your tears streaming down your cheek.

“Sam, go get a blanket and some water. (Y/N), look at me,” Dean put his hand on your shoulder, lifting your head.

“I-I…” your voice broke as you opened your eyes, looking at Dean.

“(Y/N), we are going to find him. He is going to be okay,” he stroked your cheek softly, wiping away your tears as you nodded your head softly.

“Come here,” he wrapped his arms around you tightly, rocking you, calming you down.

---

“Where’s (Y/N)?” Dean entered the bunker, looking around.

“In her room. She’s been in there for a week,” Sam sighed, looking up at Dean.

“We need to help her,” Dean sat down in front of Sam, sitting at the table in the war room.

“There’s nothing we can do, Dean. We were too late. We found his body. She just needs some time to process.”

Dean looked at your room, seeing the door closed as he sighed. It was something no one could ever forget. Finally tracking down the kitsune, finding Jackson’s body.

He stood up, walking to your room as he knocked at the door.

“(Y/N)? I’m coming in,” he opened the door, finding you sitting up in your bed, wrapping your arms around your legs as you buried your head in your lap.

“(Y/N),” Dean put his arm around your back, pulling you close to him.

You sighed softly, keeping your tears at bay as you rested your head on his shoulder.

“Is there anything I can do for you?” he asked.

“I just wish I could forget all about it,” you replied, your voice low.

“I know,” he started.

“Can you call Cas?” you asked softly.

“What? Wait, you’re being serious? (Y/N),” Dean warned, giving you a frown.

“I can’t live like this, Dean. I’m trying so hard not to give up,” you whispered.

“Why would you… (Y/N), the only way to deal with this is to deal with it. You can’t just forget about your problems and move on. You need to grieve, you need to process.”

“Not forever, just for now-”

“(Y/N),”

“Dean, please. I need this.”

Dean paused, running his fingers through his hair before exhaling softly.

“Fine, I’ll call him,” 

You let out a breath of relief, thanking Dean as you held onto him.

---

You smiled at Sam and Dean, walking down the hallway in the bunker before sitting next to Dean, kicking your feet up.

“(Y/N), my books,” Sam rolled his eyes.

“Then you can move them,” you shrugged innocently.

Sam glared at you, pulling his books away from you before raising an eyebrow to Dean.

Dean only glared back.

“Do grandpa and grandpa need a moment? Seriously, what’s going on? Dean, did you throw away Sam’s smoothie? Sam, did you eat his pie?” you raised an eyebrow, eyeing the two Winchesters.

Sam closed his book, standing up and walking away from the two of you.

You sat up, looking slightly concerned as you looked at Dean.

“I just need to talk to him, give me a minute,” Dean quickly stood up, running towards Sam.

“Hey, what the hell is your problem?” Dean whisper-yelled.

“This is such a dumb idea, Dean. People can’t just forget and move on,” Sam replied.

“It was her choice, and as her friend, we should respect that, okay?” Dean tried to keep his voice down.

“We should've convinced her not to,” Sam shook his head.

“It’s only-” Dean started.

“Only temporary, I know. You keep saying that but it’s been two months, Dean. It's not temporary anymore. Instead of trying to convince her to remember, we just pushed it away. That’s not what we’re supposed to do. We’re supposed to be her friends and we’re supposed to be there for her, not encourage her to push it away,” Sam said, frustrated.

“I know, just give it some more time,” the two of them turned to you, watching you smile softly at yourself, thinking of whatever you thought of.

Dean knew that they had never seen you as happy as you were these past two months. He turned to Sam once more, shaking his head.

“It’s only temporary.”

[shirtlesssammy]

7x04: Defending Your Life

Then:

Sam’s crazy, and Cas is dead

Now:

A man runs from a speeding car and into the quiet of an alley. Only the car’s right there! He takes off running again. The car gets ON THE SIDEWALK --AND UP THE STAIRS...okay, not, but the dude runs to his apartment and the car is INSIDE THE HOME! 

Sam and Dean are on the case! 

This episode comes on the heels of Amy, and Sam thanks Dean for not killing her. Coolcoolcoolcoolcool. They head to the crime scene and get the low-down on the victim, Matthew Hammond. He was crushed to death by a car. EMF is crazy, there’s weird dirt on the floor, one sobriety chip, and receipts to a place called Jane’s. The brothers split up. 

Sam learns more than he probably should from Matt’s AA sponsor. Dean finds that Jane’s is a flower shop, and Matt pre-paid for flower deliveries for 3 years right before he died. 

The flowers were going to an Elizabeth Duren. Dean gets the address --it’s a grave. It seems Matt accidentally backed over her while she was on her bike ten years ago. Dean wonders if he was drunk when he hit her --as he drinks his own grief beer. Sam moves to go burn the bones. 

Later, a man runs into a diner, with a dog in hot pursuit. He runs to the bathroom screaming, “Get that thing away from me!” He calls 911, but it’s too late --the dog is in the bathroom!

After a night of grave digging, Sam reads about the latest death. They ponder if dogs have ghosts. 

The guy ran dog fights, got caught, worked as a dog shelter volunteer, and continued long after his probation ended. “People change,” Sam clarifies. Dean doubts it. AHEM. A quick visit to the coroner reveals more red dirt. 

Cut to the boys driving to an apple orchard. Suddenly, an old man pops out into the road. The brothers get him to safety. 

At the motel, the man tells the brothers that he was just put on trial and sentenced to die for robbing a liquor store and killing the owner back in 1981. He just got out of prison. Dean’s brain hurts. Turns out the court was in a barn at the apple farm. 

The brothers talk privately about the case. Dean isn’t so sure they should be helping these people. Sam doesn’t think it’s fair to judge so quickly. They split up again, with Dean heading to the bar where Matthew and the older man were before their trials. 

Sam asks Warner, the older man, to draw some symbols he saw at the barn, and then puts him in a salt circle before heading out to the barn. 

At the bar, Dean orders a double Scotch and then another. 

The bartender doesn’t have any answers for him, but asks, “Love life or job?” BOTH. He talks to her about Amy, and she keeps pouring the drinks. 

Sam gets to the barn and finds red dirt, but not much else. Bobby calls to report on the symbols. They’re Egyptian and from the Book of the Dead. They’re dealing with the God Osirus. He looks into the human heart and weighs the guilt. If he sees more than a feather’s worth, you’re dead. Bobby tells Sam they need to get out of there. “This guy hones in on people who feel guilty.” 

Cut to Dean “Guilt is my default setting” Winchester, leaving the bar. He gets a call, and before he can talk, gets snatched into the shadows. 

Sam keeps calling Dean until the waitress picks up. Dean was supposed to meet her, but he’s not there. Sam runs to meet her. 

Warner continues to wait in his salt circle, until the lights start flickering. He inadvertently scatters the salt. He runs, and the ghosts of his victims catch up to him.

Dean struggles, chained to a chair in a highly decorated barn. There are Egyptian statues and torches, and Osiris himself chilling out on his throne. Osiris tries to shoo Sam from the building, but Sam insists that Dean has the right to an attorney. This seems to amuse Osiris, and he allows it. Don’t worry, Dean. Sam was pre-law! He watched a lot of legal dramas on TV so he’s pretty much an expert. 

Sam manages to squeak in a good objection at the start of the trial: Osiris is about to call in witnesses, but they haven’t had time to prepare! Osiris laughs at this. He’s the judge and he makes the rules. 

Jo appears, ghost-pale. She greets the Winchesters. She testifies, and we get a supercut of Jo and Dean’s past episodes. They hunted together and Jo fondly describes Dean as “kind of a jerk.” Dean looks ashamed, so the trial is off to a GREAT START. Osiris asks if it was hard to work with Dean since she felt so strongly about him - strong enough to follow him into any battle. GUH. Jo tries to call out Osiris on the case against Dean that he’s trying to build, but Sam steps up to save the day. He cross examines Jo, asking her about her relationship with her dad. “Why’d you start [hunting]?” Sam asks. “To impress some loud mouth ass you just met, or ‘cause you wanted to be like your dad?” It’s definitely the latter! Jo tries to tell Dean something else but Osiris flashes her right out of the barn. 

Osiris allows the Winchesters to talk briefly - Dean professes no clue about who Osiris will call next. Osiris calls Sam to the stand. 

Osiris brings up Sam’s failed attempt at normalcy. He was going to be a lawyer, marry Jess, and leave the hunting life behind until Dean pulled him back in. (What the Winchesters NEED right now is a good ol’ fashioned fan with encyclopedic knowledge of the books to tell them that Hell’s minions would have always pulled Sam back in one way or the other.) Sam has no such fan to help him out. Instead of denying Dean’s role in pulling him away from his apple-pie life, Sam says “It’s complicated.” OOF. 

Dean watches all this, and his mind assembles a supercut reel of Dean is The Worst Human Who Gets Everyone He Loves Killed. DEAN BEAN! Osiris asks if Dean would rather have Sam damned with him, than be alone. Sam treats this with the proper look of disdain it deserves. 

Dean, however, looks like a sad lamb who just learned he’s getting served for dinner. Sam swears that Dean had nothing to do with him being back in the hunting life. He tries to convince Osiris, but the god tells him that convincing him isn’t the task. Sam has to convince Dean that he isn’t guilty and MAN if that isn’t ever a lost cause. “I don’t decide anything,” Osiris says. “I just weigh the guilt that’s already there.” 

Sam wants to call Dean to the stand. The chains break with a wave of Osiris’s hand and Sam begins his questioning. He asks if Dean could have predicted what happened to Sam and Jess, and Dean admits that he couldn’t have done so. Sam moves on to Jo. Dean admits that he didn’t kill her. He’s just sad she’s dead. 

Osiris is hugely amused at the show. Sam tries to move on past Osiris’s commentary to ask if Dean’s heart is heavy with guilt - or just plain heavy. And if that ain’t a good line right there! Osiris tells them that he was SO amused, he’s granting Dean a boon. He gives Dean the choice of allowing Osiris to call his last witness or move straight to judgment. Dean sees a montage of himself killing Amy. He buckles like a cheap tin can under a heel and begs for the trial to be over rather than call Amy to the stand. Osiris hands down his decision: Dean is guilty in his heart and is sentenced to die. 

Sam and Dean arrive back at the hotel to find the guy they tried to save dead. Dean greets that news fatalistically: Osiris always gets his victims. Sam and Bobby haven’t given up, though! Bobby found a way to stop Osiris: stab him with a ram’s horn. 

Sam hops online and finds out that an instrument made out of a ram’s horn is blown during services at synagogues. Time to desecrate a house of worship! Dean eyes Sam sadly and tells him that Osiris is going to send Jo to kill him. Sam shrugs it off and tells him to prepare against ghosts and he’ll be fine. When Sam leaves, Dean lays out a circle of salt and then tells Jo to come out. She materializes. 

Sam breaks into the synagogue and finds the shofar. Just a short while later, Sam’s got the shofar in his car, and he speeds back to find Osiris.

Back with Dean, Jo apologizes for what’s about to happen. She tells him that she liked her life, and he’s not to blame.

Dean tells her that both she and Sam were just kids tangled up in his destructive wake. “Hunters are never kids. I never was.” We stop and gently dab handkerchiefs to our eyes thinking about little four year old Dean. He tells her that he didn’t want to hunt alone, and that’s why he didn’t fight harder to keep her away from the hunting life. 

“I’d like to have seen you try,” Jo says. 

Iconic Dialog Alert: 

Jo: You carry all kinds of crap you don’t have to.

Dean: I am ninety percent crap. If I get rid of that, what then?

Jo: You really wanna die not knowing? 

Jo tells him that it’s time, and she flashes over to the stove to turn on the gas. Dean remembers how Jo died in an explosion and this look passes over him like, YES this is fitting and just. 

For You’re Killing Me Dean Science:

A woman leaves the tavern. Osiris lurks around the corner waiting to abduct her….

Jo flashes up to the salt line and tells him in somber amusement that she used to hunt ghosts. A simple salt circle? Plz. Ice cracks the window, shatters it, and a sudden breeze blows the salt away. She tells him sorrowfully that Osiris is making her do all of this. “It’s okay,” he assures her. Jo pulls out a lighter from Dean’s pocket. 

Outside the tavern, Osiris is busy trying to abduct his next victim when Sam swoops in from behind. One stab with a ram’s horn later and Osiris starts smoking up a storm, tumbling into dust.

Jo gives Dean one more caress and then the lighter drops. Jo disappears.

The next morning, the birds are chirping. The flowers are nodding. And the Winchesters are talking about Jo.

For Beautiful Everything Science:

Dean asks why Sam tried to defend him, and then compliments him on his lawyering skills. Good job, Sammy! Sam wonders who the third witness was supposed to be. Dean dissembles: it could be just about anyone dead they know - and ain’t THAT the truth! In turn, Dean wonders why Osiris didn’t go after Sam. “I just don’t feel guilty anymore,” Sam tells him. But Hell was a kind of penance for him. “My past is my past and I can move on with my life,” Sam says, robustly healthy in that moment. “I feel good, Dean.”

Dean eyes the beer in his hand with exhaustion. “Well, you are going to be a pleasure to ride with,” he deadpans.

My Soul is Lighter Than a Quote:

“Ghost dog?” “No weirder than ghost car”

One simple friggin' day on the job. Is that too much to ask?

Sam? You're not a lawyer

People want to be judged

Hunters are never kids. I never was

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