#once again this is a little different since no fandom was stated

[okkalo]

⊹˚. ♡ hi hi! i’m Dove and i was wondering if i could have a romantic matchup please?

i’m not entirely sure what my gender or sexuality is :,> (all i know is that i have a preference for men)

i really like sleeping when i can, drawing and writing are things i also like to do! i also like ranting about random things-

i tend to stay by myself though i do like hanging out with my friends whenever i can! i’m very sensitive emotionally and i tend to be able to empathize with people easily, though it tends to take a toll on me. having anger issues doesn’t help either- though i rarely take my emotions out on people.

i’m very physically affectionate and i tend to show my love through actions rather than words. i tend to get overstimulated/overwhelmed whenever there’s too much noise or people around me. i’m also super loyal to my friends and tend to be a bit protective over them (and just the people i love in general)

i tend to stay up VERY late at night because it’s pretty calming and it’s when i have the most energy. i tend to stay at home a lot but i do like going on walks or randomly exploring my area. i’d also like to be a librarian or work at a bookstore!

i love moths and cats to death and could talk for hours about them tbh- though i love listening to people i like talk about the things they like too!

thank you lots for your time and have a great day!

₊‧.°.⋆✮⋆.°.‧₊

hi dove! you never stated which fandom you wanted a matchup from so i’m doing something a bit different for you,, i hope you don’t mind! besides that, thank you very much for participating in my event :> i hope you enjoy your matchups and have a wonderful day -`♡´-

𝗶 𝗻𝗲𝘃𝗲𝗿 𝘁𝗵𝗼𝘂𝗴𝗵𝘁 𝗮 𝗰𝘂𝘁𝗶𝗲 𝗹𝗶𝗸𝗲 𝘆𝗼𝘂𝗿𝘀𝗲𝗹𝗳 𝘄𝗼𝘂𝗹𝗱 𝗯𝗲 𝗮 𝗳𝗮𝗻 𝗼𝗳 𝗺𝗶𝗻𝗲 ₊˙♡﹗

he adores you and your soft-spoken and good-natured attitude. though, when it gets to the point where it’s becoming trouble for you, he will quickly step in and try to make life easier for you. while also lightly scolding you, keep in mind.

he would love taking naps with you, coddling you in these moments. he would always encourage you to share your drawings or writings while giving feedback if you so wished to hear it. of course, most of his feedback are compliments. best believe he would listen to every word that comes out of your mouth while you rant as well. he partakes in active listening, nodding along with your words while also peering at you so adoringly.

he might draw the line in staying up late with you, however. instead, he might try to switch you to sleeping a bit earlier with him and get you into a healthier sleep routine.

he shows much of his love just like you do—with his actions. though, if you are alright with it, he would also love physical touch on top of it as well!

𝗸𝗮𝗹𝗼 𝗺𝗮𝘁𝗰𝗵𝗲𝘀 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝘄𝗶𝘁𝗵 : jing yuan from hsr, yukimiya from bllk, mitsuya from tokyo rev, and kazuha or diluc from genshin

[plumelume]

𖹭. ˎgosh, I'm in love w/ you. ₊

tw : nothing ?

˙ . ꒷. word counts : 5842 .𑁤

ft : lovetales fic(?), block tales au by @niko-aspin !!

! note : im very grateful to be a part of this au and being the one to write for it as well !! though im not the best at it and it may come off messy.. either way big thanks to @fandoms-in-jellyfish-brain for the idea (⁠ノ⁠^⁠_⁠^⁠)⁠ノ

! ! !

— PROLOGUE: starting from the zero —

“Now what am I supposed to do for I've finished my adventure?”

The end has come to greet you, you are hesitant to embrace it, you wonder holding the sword which accompanied you since forever leveled your head. The metal on its blade reflects your figure, you don't recognize yourself. Do you?

“What am I going to chase after?”

Your goal is fulfilled, but what about you? Foolishly neglected your emotions to chase after something so meaningless. You deserve more than just this, you stated.

The deafening silent inner your head blocks out all sounds from the outside world, leaving only the sound of your sword clashes against the cold ground. You walk towards nothingness, trying to once again, find a life purpose of your existence.

As if the nonexistent gods hear your unspoken plea, a strange card comes within your sight. Successfully stopped your tracks as soon as it appeared, you stood there in the slightest surprise. Is it your eroded memories that's playing with you or the card was just there..? Even if so, it seems intentional considering how it's just, bare in the wild. In the midst of nowhere, it invites you to come and take a closer look, as if it was.. Fate..?

Still uncertain with the beholding sight, you prolonged your fixed gaze on the glitching item. It waits there,waiting specifically. “Cute.” In spite of your little compliment, the tone you held says otherwise, as though your words held no meanings. You slumped your tired body nearing the floating card.

You eventually obtain the card, Inspecting it from this side to another, struggling to figure out the use of it. Meeting the eye alone, you can see how differ it is from any other heart cards, the signature red was replaced with pink. Outstands each and every card you ever got a hold of.

What an intriguing little thing, you thrived.

A smile tugged on your lips upon receiving such a gift from the unknown, you know little to no information about this unique card or whatsoever. But to compare with the former danger you’ve faced, this is far tame from what you experienced. Why should you back up now?

“You’ll be in great use.” You said to it as if it has a soul, equipping the card among your collection. It instantly painted the surrounding scenery with a soft pink hue, the sky itself dressed in a rosy attire. Leaving youur mouth agape as you watch things pinken.

You were fascinated, witnessing a new canvas come into your sight. Before any further feelings emerged, the pain took over. Aches altogether tormenting your poor head, make you — the oh so powerful holder writhe in agony, fall onto the land beneath. You’re still a fool, despite everything.

With your finite limitations being pushed all over, you left no choice but to succumb to the immense pain causing through your head. Drifted away into a deep slumber.

A pitiful end. Or not.

“Hey! Wake up.. Get up baka!” A faint voice calls out to you..

“HWUAH—” You hurriedly sit up from where you lay after regaining consciousness, chest heaving with heavy huffs. Your brain couldn't register anything yet, you clutched on the sheet on your sides. Too many thoughts clump into one, unknowingly give the nearby penguin a scare.

Gather some bits of consciousness, you rub all over your eyes, clearing your vision aggressively like you’ve had a nightmare. Amid the blurry effect, you caught a glimpse of.. Something pink and round. Your internal thoughts then being broken by the creature’s voice. “Did you have a good nap?” Still in a daze, you give no motion to any answers.

“Do you not hear what I said!?” A rocket launcher enters your vision, that's when you’re all woke. This creature.. Was none other than Terry. You nod your head vigorously without another thought, “Yes— I did have a good nap—” A hurried response withdraws from your mouth. He watches you stumble on your wobbly feet then fall onto the floor, Terry is slightly taken aback by your sudden action. But nonetheless, he’s still angry at you.

You get up from your spot with a grunt, “Ugh.” Seeing you picking yourself up so slowly fueled into his impatience, about to throw another fits of screams. Fortunately, you’ve gotten up in time. “The AUDACITY of people these days.. You think you can just sleep anywhere you want, baka??” The infuriated penguin made no effort in hiding his frustrations.

It happens again. You are back here without the remnants of your previous success. You stare in horror, taking no time to dash out of Terry’s room. Surprised him in the process, he’s glad that he didn’t need to hear your nonsense though. Recovering from the brief panic, you finally have some time to capture the current situation.

You — equipped with a card, pink envelope the entire world, headaches rush, and last but not least, a new start. You are hesitant, you really couldn’t handle another journey like this, you’d be mentally drained foremost. You open the menu, as expected, nothing. Only the superball, some few cards and.. Hold on — A new card randomly popped up in your inventory.

“Flirt..?” You deadpanned at the name, is this some new mechanic of the game..? Either way, you’re hella confused. Only time could tell the use of this card. Glanced at the inventory, that damned card remains there, you quickly try to unequip it but your efforts are gone in vain. After retrying for over plenty of times, you gave up and sighed in defeat.You’re stuck with it like glues now.

Right, what were you supposed to do again.. You darted your eyes towards the hallway of the hotel, puzzled for a moment, “Got it.” Muttering to yourself, you begrudgingly walk to the receptionist outside with great disinterest. Questions flooded your mind, thoughts landed on your short encounter with Terry, from how he appears and — Wait. Didn't he refer to you as ‘baka’? The infamous word?? You cringed hard.

“Geez, what's wrong with this world?”

END OF PROLOGUE !! Style and storyline might change as it progresses, this is my first so I might not get things right (⁠｡⁠•́⁠︿⁠•̀⁠｡⁠)

[rebelliousstories]

Ten Thousand Candles

Kiss Me You Animal

Relationship: Cooper “The Ghoul” Howard x Zylia “The Freak” Shelley

Fandom: Fallout

Request: No

Warnings: Fluff, Strong Language, Mentions of Death and Killing

Word Count: 711

Main Masterlist: Here

Fallout Masterlist: Here

//Chapter Two//

Kiss Me You Animal Masterlist: Here

Summary: Cooper is not too sure if he is impressed or fed up with this new girl. Probably both.

Have you ever seen someone who just looks like if you say the wrong thing, no matter how small, they would hurt you and everyone in the immediate vicinity? That was Cooper Howard right now. He was tearing through the town faster than a bat out of hell, trailing after a girl. Why was he following this girl? Because just a few minutes ago they met, as she stole his bounty that she was now cashing in on.

Walking into town, he just caught the trail of the unearthly colored hair disappearing into the shop where the bounty originated. He gritted his teeth, and waited outside until she was to return. Cooper found a rocking chair, and waited. He was a patient man, and that was being put to the test as he sat there. Most people passed by him without so much as a glance, but others took one look at him and scurried away. It did not much matter to him anymore. He had two hundred years to come to terms with his new state.

Seeing her white hair come through the door, he took note and noticed her shoving something in her bag. He stood up slowly, marching his way up to her while she was distracted.

“Well, gotta say, sure as shit been a long time since someone stole my bounty from right under me.” Howard drawled, almost jovial in his speech. The woman’s head whipped up to see The Ghoul in front of her once more.

“Maybe you shouldn’t be so slow then, Ghoulie.” She teased, finding joy in annoying him.

“I wasn’t slow,” he growled, “you were just a sneaky little minx who can’t keep her sticky fingers away from what’s not hers.” Cooper stepped closer to the woman, assessing whether or not he needed to draw his gun. But she just laughed.

“That ain’t how I remember it.” The still unknown woman got even closer to Cooper, and toyed with the edge of his jacket. He snatched it away, and stepped away with a flourish.

“Now, only time Imma tell you. Give me the caps that you got paid for my bounty, and we’ll be on our way.” His hand rested on his pistol while the other was outstretched.

“And if I don’t give you my caps for my bounty?” She replied, brushing a hand through her hair nonchalantly.

“I’d hate to kill someone as pretty as you now darlin’.” Cooper smiled, and hoped she would do the right thing. As she stood there, contemplating, The Ghoul was steadily losing his patience. She came closer and closer to his outstretched gloved hand, until it was resting right against her stomach. Sifting through her bag, she placed a singular bottle cap in his hand and closed his fingers around it.

“For you troubles. Name’s Zylia, by the way. Next time don’t be so slow.” The now named woman patted Cooper on the shoulder, and began to walk away from him. However, he had different plans. Howard stood there with the cap in his hand, and a million thoughts running through his head. Pocketing the cap, he turned to where Zylia was walking away.

“Do you have a death wish?” He called, making her stop for a brief moment. Even from all this distance, the pink eyes she held pierced his very soul.

“Maybe. What’s it to you?” Zylia responded, toying with a strand of hair.

“Do you know who I am?” Cooper questioned again, fully turning his body to face her.

“No. Should I?” Once more, his patience was being tested. Cooper moved his duster out of the way and rested a hand on his pistol that was still holstered.

“Little girl, I’m really not in the mood for this. Give me the caps.” He repeated, fully ready for a shoot out.

“Little girl? Well, I might be little, but not young enough to be a girl. I’m just gonna be on my way if that’s alright with you, Ghoul.” Again, Zylia turned around and began to walk away from the man. He chuckled softly, before drawing his pistol and aiming it at the girl.

It all happened in a flash, but the sound was one that was an everyday occurrence in the Wastelands.

Bang!

[the-lonelybarricade]

LB my dear dear! I have devoured all yours and MB's ao3 works till date ❤️🤌 and I am feeling pathetically ravenous for more 🫠. Although my question is- since I have seen people asking you for suggestions as to which blog and which writer to look to for more feysand/elucien content I would like to request the same only and only if you are comfortable and have the time for this pressing request. And thank you even if you couldn't for some reason im only scared since you are busy and wouldnt want to burden you with such an exigent task. . I'm sorry to bother you That would be it 🥺 👉👈

You want blog suggestions for Elucien/Feysand authors? And you think you're bothering me??? Anon, this happens to be my exact area of exertise and there is nothing love more than hyping up my friends!

To kick us off my lovely friend @velidewrites is an extraordinarily talented writer and artist, and also just an all-around ray of sunshine whose blog I cannot recommend enough.

There's also @writtenonreceipts who's every work is literal potery. Pick any of her stroies and you will come undone.

@belabellissima has a beautiful Feysand/Elucien series called the State of Grace and is also one of my favorite people 🥺💝

@azrielshadowssing also regularly feeds us with delciioiusly sinful Feysand and Elucien stories 🥰 hehehe definitely read the tags though!

Among a host of other incredible fics, @damedechance has an onlyfans series that will make you feral - Playgirl (Elucien) and darling.exe (Feysand) 👀👀 Come back to me once you finish losing your mind

@xtaketwox and @itsthedoodle come as Feysand/Elucien pair hehe. @xtaketwox has treated us to lots of goodies, but I wanted to highlight her modern soulmate AU which has a dedicated work for Feysand, Elucien, and Nessian! @itsthedoodle has written so many beautiful feysand oneshots and is the sweetest, most unhinged person you'll ever have the pleasure of knowing.

@asnowfern is so talented and writes for a lot of different pairings, including Feysand and Elucien! Right now she's working on a stunning Feysand AU inspired by a chinese legend called Till Forever Falls Apart

if you're a fan of next-gen, @areyoudreaminof has lots of adorable fics and headcanons centering around Elucien and Feysand as parents!

@witch-and-her-witcher again writes for many couples, including Feysand and Elucien! She recently wrote a Feysand and Nyx oneshot, The Little Tiger, that completely fractured my heart and put it back together.

@thegloweringcastle is another extremely talented writer who has a wealth of feysand and elucien fics! One I really love is the The Law of the Land which is a Feysand western AU with background Elucien 🤠

@darling-archeron has been in this fandom since 2016 and in that time has blessed us with so much wonderful Feysand and Elucien content!! (One day you really need to sit us all down and tell us the fandom lore we all missed out on from the acomaf/acowar releases 👀)

@iambutmortal has a lot of delicious Feysand and Elucien stories! For Elucienweek last year she wrote a really addicting story called The Honeymooners

@labellefleur-sauvage has written so many incredible Elucien fics! As well as a very delicious monster!Feyre fic called Meet Me In the Woods hehehe 👀

@foundress0fnothing always blows me away with her writing. For Elucienweek last year she wrote an Elucien sex cult fic titled Both Forever and Rather Die that lives in my head rent free.

@howlingcaptaincommando is working on a really amazing pirate AU, Never Shall I Die, centering around Elucien, Nessian, and Feysand!

@vulpes-fennec has so many lovely stories, including her Prythian Fantasia WIP which centers on the Archeron sisters and their mates 😍

@popjunkie42 has yet to dip her toes into writing Elucien but maybe one day we can convince her 👀👀 That said she has so many amazing Feysand works such as Hate Me Instead and her current WIP Blossoming In Winter.

Likewise my dearest friend @wilde-knight has only written Elucien and Nessian, but I can't recommend her works and blog enough!! She's working on an amazing Princess Bride AU called Burnished Gold

@captain-of-the-gwynriel-ship is a die-hard Feysand, Elucien, Gwynriel, and Nessian! Currently they're working on a Feysand fic Five Minutes to Midnight which also features background Elucien!

@octobers-veryown creates so many wonderful moodboards for variuos ships and characters! I cannot recommend following them enough💕

And finally @rosanna-writer, @reverie-tales, @thesistersarcheron, and @starfall-spirit are my multishipping queens 🥰 On their blogs you'll find wonderful content for Feysand, Elriel, Elucien, and other ships as well!

[whiskeyghoul]

Reprimand || [Secondo/Papa Emeritus II X F!Reader]

A/N: Hello friends. Different from my previous criminal minds fics I decided to dip my toes in writing Ghost fics. Since I watched rite here rite now the flames of this fandom have been awakened once more. I am literally going insane. This fic got a bit out of hand. Like… I am not sorry but yeah it is long.

Credits: Divider by @wrathofrats

WC: 6,1K 

Tags: p with plot, ghost, ghost band, secondo, punishment, purely self indulgent. 

Warnings: 18+, MDNI, unprotected,  p in v, spanking, abuse of power if you squint, just all of them…

3 times. 3 separate times you have managed to embarrass yourself in front of the head of your satanic church. Papa Emeritus the second was not known to be one of the more forgiving papas. In all fairness he scared you a little, he was cold, intimidating. Every time you ran into him he made you tremble, perhaps that is why you embarrassed yourself so many times. Though something about his imposing presence filled you with a conflicting feeling. Along with feeling intimidated, a little scared to anger him, you felt a certain attraction. 

The first time you embarrassed yourself, well, it was a doozy. You had joined the satanic church not too long ago. Settling in as a sister of sin quite well. The role assigned to you was mostly library duty, having a great insight in organization and keeping an inventory of texts, scripts and tomes along with other satanic literature. You were standing on a step stool, rearranging a shelf of books to make space for a new addition to the library. Softly humming to yourself, lost in thought as you pulled one of the larger books from the shelf. The biblichor filling your nose was wonderfully sweet and dusty. Giving it a thorough wipe with a dusting cloth. The gold embellishments shone on the leather as you tilted it side to side. 

You were pulled from your thoughts as a smooth voice cleared its throat next to you. “Hand me that book on the top shelf. If you could.” You turned awfully fast, the book slipping from your hands in surprise. A squeak passed your lips as you felt your heartbeat pick up. A pained groan leaving the man before you as you just realized you dropped one of the heavier texts on the feet of Papa Emeritus the second. “Sorella.” His voice was low, his eyes dark and brows furrowed. Nose flaring as he took a deep breath. A scrutinizing gaze that made your hands tremble, your knees weak. “Papa! I am terribly sorry! Oh Sathanas, please forgive me.” You rambled an apology, trying to step down quickly from the step stool to go fetch something, anything, to lessen the blow of the book. Instead, in all your nerves and bumbling about, you nearly planted your face first into the ground. That would be if he hadn't reached out, grabbing your arm in a strong grip to keep you from falling face first. You found your footing, feeling your face flare bright red at the foolish display you had just made of yourself. His hand left your arm, and with it it's surprising warmth. “Once again, I apologize, Papa.” A stammering message you were, trying to beg for forgiveness from the figure you had only envisioned as intimidating. Only ever having spoken in passing, literally, a simple exchange when you walked past. Or watched him sermon, powerfully, passionately. Those sermons left you wondering at times, what he would be like to speak to.

You were waiting for him to scold you. Your eyes cast downward to your neatly polished black heels, suddenly every speck of dust on them was interesting to you. Remembering the book at his feet you quickly knelt down, picking it up and clutching it to your chest. Your heartbeat hammering against the leather bound book. “I asked for the book on the top shelf.” He stated it simply but firmly, not the scolding you expected. Maybe, he was giving you some reprieve for being new. “Ofcourse, I'm sorry.” You quickly stepped on the step stool, carefully this time. Placing the book in your hands back on its respective shelf. Reaching up to the book that laid horizontally on the top shelf. Your hands were trembling as you picked it up. Habit feeling too tight, too short, as you brought down the book. Looking down ever so slightly as you handed the book to Secondo. Whose eyes flicked up to your face from somewhere lower. “Thank you, sorella, now. Do not let it happen again. These are priceless after all. You shall be off with a warning. Only one.” His mismatched eyes bore into yours as he spoke. You swallowed thickly, eyes wide, nodding your head. “Ofcourse, thank you, Papa.” words all falling from your mouth without thinking. “Continue your work then.” He turned, his robes moving elegantly as he walked out of the library. Leaving you to wallow in self pity at the fool you made of yourself.

The second time, a ghoul came with the message that Secondo had instructed you to gather papers and texts from the library to bring to his quarters. He even sent a list. Eager to please after the previous embarrassment, you agreed in a heartbeat. When you had found everything you made your way towards the wing of his room, arms filled with old tomes and yellowed paper. Sore from the weight of it. You didn't understand why he would need all of these, but it must have been for some important research. Most of the texts in your arms were old, rare, and barely anyone picked them up in the library. Yet he had asked for them specifically. Heels clicking on the tile as you made way down the hallways to his quarters, reaching the door you realized there was no way for you to knock. You furrowed your brows, deciding to twist so your elbow hit the door twice. As close to a knock as you could get. “Enter.” Secondo's voice sounded from the other side of the wooden door. Staring at the door knob you had to think of something. You knocked again with a sigh. “Enter.” His voice sounded annoyed, clearly he was busy. Or perhaps having a bad day. “I- I brought the books.” You spoke loudly, hoping he'd be able to hear you. There was a muttered word you couldn't quite make out before he spoke again. “I expected that. I said, enter.” He sounded ticked off now, voice laced with the barest hint of anger.

You sighed, furrowing your brows as you tried to maneuver your elbow and hip just so that you could turn the doorknob. Pushing against it to make it easier to open. With a click, the door swung open, leaving you unbalanced and falling through the open space. The books and texts falling to the floor. Sprawling out onto the wood and carpet. “Cazzo!” Secondo cursed as he stood up. You scrambled onto your knees, gathering the papers closest to you as you repeated continued apologies. Forgetting the pain in your nose and elbows from where you fell. Not even feeling the warm drip that slowly slid down to your lips. Eyes glued to the books and papers on the floor. “Those are priceless artifacts. Idiotta. How are you even considered to handle these when you are so incompetent. Dropping books here and there.” His footsteps came close, coming to a halt right in your field of vision. Still, you didn't dare to look. “I am so sorry, Papa, you are right. I should be more careful.” Your hands never stilled their work, piling up the books in front of you. “Look at me when I am talking” His voice commanded. Your head snapped up, swallowing thickly as you caught his mismatched eyes again. The blood from your nose dripping on your habit. “You are like a bumble bee. Flying into everything, causing chaos in our system. We do not need a bumbling idiota to ruin our priceless artifacts.” He was right. In his presence you were terribly clumsy. He made you nervous. Your heart beat faster. Hands feeling uncharacteristically clammy all of a sudden. And your face once again heating with a fierce embarrassed blush.

“Now, corporal punishment seems redundant.” His eyes flicked down, where the blood dripped down to your habit, landing just on the swell of your breast. A harsh exhale sounded through his nose. “Fix your habit, sorella. I expect everyone to be in pristine condition. Even the bumble bees.”  His remark was snide. You could imagine what you looked like to him. On your knees, blood dripping down your nose and mouth, reaching your chin to drip down further onto your habit and grucifix. Eyes wide, hands placed on your thighs, trembling ever so slightly. You licked your lips, tasting the metallic of your blood and embarrassment. You must have looked like a mess. Scrambling to your feet you wiped at your nose, finally daring to move with his permission. The blood staining the white cuff around your wrist. “I'm sorry again, Papa.” You repeated an apology before heading out the door and to your own quarters to change. Terribly disappointed in yourself you decided in that moment things needed to change.

So now you were here. The third time you were walking down towards the chapel with another sister of sin, you had been asked to bring the unholy communion to prepare for the mass that night. Being on your best behavior since the previous incidents. Your workload seemingly increasing, your proximity to secondo growing closer with each task he bestowed upon you. No more books dropped, no more stumbles, you did everything to behave and paid close attention to any movement you made. The efforts were working, Secondo had even so much as complimented you for it after you had helped prepare the altar for a ritual. In his own way. “Sorella, I've noticed a lack of bumble bees around. Your efforts don't go unnoticed. Well done.” hearing those two last words made your heart flutter. Perhaps it was due to finally receiving praise, or it was specifically receiving praise from him. Every look from him made your heart beat faster. Every chaste, accidental touch made you wonder what his hands would feel like on your body. Your thoughts wandering back to that second time, when he had mentioned corporal punishment. What that could mean, what he could do in that office of his. Especially after hearing a few of the sisters speak about singular thrysts they had had with him.

The pitcher of wine was surprisingly heavy in your hands. The fragrant wine was a deep, blood red. As you walked down the hallways you took careful steps, trying not to let the wine slosh over the side of the pitchers. “I don’t understand why we can not keep it in the bottles.” You sighed as you almost spilt a drop of wine. “Honestly it is probably just rituals left over from years ago. I'm almost certain they did an unholy prayer over them.” The sister, Elaine, answered in turn. You rolled your eyes at that, never understanding why traditions couldn’t be changed. “It feels almost like it is inevitable to spill it though.” You spoke, trying to keep up with Elaine. “Perhaps that is why you were asked to help.” She returned, a small smirk as she walked so effortlessly with the pitcher in hand. “What do you mean?” You hoped tales of your clumsiness hadn't yet spread all throughout the church. It was likely though. People talked, gossip was a given. “You don't know what they have been saying?” Elaine turned her face towards you with furrowed brows. A curious expression on your face. You shook your head no, truly not an idea of what she could be talking about. “Well, you have been given a lot of tasks by Secondo, have you not?” She questioned. “Yes, I thought he did so with most siblings.” you answered, honestly. Elaine shook her head no, a smirk playing at her perfectly painted lips. “Oh no, he's been testing you. Seeing if you will trip up again. He needs a reason you see.” Her voice lowered to a whisper as you walked. “A reason for what?” You asked, no longer paying attention to what was ahead of you. Fully invested in the information divulged. You rounded a corner together. “A reason to punish.” She smirked. The way she said it implied less than conventional punishment.

As you did you hadn't noticed the man you were just speaking about, a mere two steps away. “Sorella.” His voice was low and you jumped. Like you were caught red handed, gossiping about your papa. The pitcher of wine sloshed, the dark red liquid spilling out and down the front of your habit. the sound of it hitting the floor was incredibly loud in your ears. Watching as drops smattered outward and staining your shoes and stockings. Along with the hem of Secondos's papal robes. You had been doing so well. All efforts ruined by a simple muttering. By not paying attention to where you were going. Your eyes flickered to Elaine whose expression was a mix of amusement and horrified. Then, they landed on the stern expression of Secondo. His nostrils flared as he eyed your drenched habit. “Sec- Papa, I'm sorry, you frightened me. I- I should go get this cleaned up. I apologize.” The words fell from your lips in rapid succession, feeling the tension in your shoulders as you held on to the, now empty, pitcher like it was your life line. “No.” That one single word shut you up. Quickly shutting your mouth as you felt a shiver run down your spine. Maybe it was the wine, wetting your habit and making it cold and clingy. Or maybe it was the effect Secondo had on you. “Get a ghoul to clean this.” He turned his head to Elaine who nodded quickly,  “ofcourse, Papa.” She spoke before leaving. Her heels clicking against the floor, trailing off and away.

“You are coming with me. Punishment seems only fair.” His hand wrapped around your upper arm, harshly pulling you along to where you knew his quarters to be. “I truly apologize. I've been trying my hardest. Please, Papa, forgive me.” He didn't listen to your begging. It didn't matter to him what you said in that moment. He seemed enraged. “You beg for forgiveness when you just blamed me for your incompetence?” He nearly hissed the words as he opened the door to his quarters. Pulling you inside and leaving you at the entrance. “I didn't- no! That's not what I meant! I'm sorry!” You tried to scramble, take back the words you had said. It wasn't your point to blame him at all. “Strip.” He commanded. Mismatched eyes trained on you as he took a step away. Discarding his robe to reveal a sinfully tight button down tucked into slacks. Delicate embroidered grucifixes on the collar. Combined with the papal painted, it was a sight to behold. You froze. Jaw slack. Mind going a hundred miles an hour, not comprehending his words and his actions together. “What?” You were like a deer in the headlights. “You are dripping red wine. We can't have you spoil the carpet in my office, can we? So, strip.” His voice did something to you, the firmness left no room for questioning. “Of-ofcourse.” You spoke with trembling hands reaching up to take off the white collar, its pristine condition forever marred with deep purple red blotches. “Leave it at your feet. The wood can be cleaned.” Secondos voice commanded and you nodded your head ever so slightly. Dropping the piece of cloth down to the floor.

Then, your hands moved  to the back of your dress. Slipping down the zipper with practiced ease. you could hear your own heartbeat, feel it pulsing under your skin, each of your nerves on end as Secondo scrutinized every move. Slipping your arms from the garment, it fell to the floor in a pile at your feet. You felt naked. Every hair standing on end as the cool air hits your skin. The cool metal of your grucifix resting right in the middle of your sternum, falling between your breasts. You crossed your arms, trying to hide away from his burning eyes. “Feeling shy, sorella?” There was a hint of amusement in his voice, as if he enjoyed seeing you uncomfortable. “Well, I have a lot more planned to put you in your place. Maybe you will learn.” He added before walking over to the large, wooden desk that stood near the end of the room. Picking up a glass along with a crystal carafe, amber liquid sloshing around the bottom. He poured a glass, taking a sip and looking rather satisfied before topping it off. “This.” He said as he walked back over, “This is a whiskey, gifted to me when I became Papa. 25 years old, single malt, a bottle costs over 500 euros. You are to not spill a single drop from this glass. Easy enough, no?” He stared deep into your eyes, holding out the glass.

"Yes, Papa.” You said, as you reached out. It should be easy enough. Though the glass was shallow, and filled much higher than it should be. But standing there and holding a glass, even with your current trembling hands you could do that. He quickly moved it back ever so slightly out of reach.  “Not like this, that would be too easy. Come.” He moved to the left, where a leather couch stood, a coffee table to the side. You watched as he sat down, patting his lap with his free hand. A wicked smirk taunting you as you realized what was going to happen. “Naughty girls like you deserve a spanking. Don't you think?” He tilted his head in your direction. His eyes traveling down your body with a hint of hunger. Dropping your hands to your sides, clenching them in small nervous fists. “You're right, ofcourse.” There was no reason to argue. You could feel a knot tighten in your stomach, as you clenched your thighs together for a mere second. Hoping that the sudden onset of arousal was just an illusion. You took the few steps to close the distance, standing in front of Secondo who tilted his head up to look at you. “Don't make me wait too long, bumble bee. Or should I extend the punishment already for your insubordination?” He patted his lap again, gloved hand on thick, sturdy thighs. “no, of course not.” You spoke softly as you were driven to action. Bracing a hand on one of his thighs as you laid yourself onto his lap. Your knees are unable to hit the ground, trying to find stability before you take a deep breath and remove your hands from the ground. Accepting the cold glass into your hands like an offering. “Here you go. Remember, not a drop gets wasted.” You nodded your head as he spoke. “Yes, I remember.” You said. “Good, I think ten will be fitting, yes?” It wasn't a question but still you agreed. 

You thought you were ready, taking in a deep breath through your nose. When that first spank didn't come you were a little confused. Tilting your head to have a look at Secondo, but as soon as you tilted your head the first spank came. Jolting forward at the sudden, sharp impact on the left side. The feel of the leather glove on your exposed behind stung. The size of his palm branding in your skin. You gasped, looking back towards the cup, realizing that if you spilled but a single drop you would only get yourself in more trouble. “Count them out, sorella.” He said as his hand rubbed gently at the skin for a second. The leather was somewhat cool now against the reddening skin. “One.” You spoke, voice teetering on quivering. Your eyes stayed glued on the cup this time, as you felt his hand leave your skin. It came down again with force, pushing the wind out of your lungs with a strangled groan. “Two.” You said, counting out like he had told you to. His hand once again rubbing at the supple skin of your ass.

Again. "Three." Each time he switched sides. Around the fifth spank you had to bite your tongue. His hand lingered longer than before, squeezing. Just inches away from where you could feel a wetness start to form between the folds of your pussy. Praying to Satan that he wouldn't notice. “How many was that, sorella?” You could feel him lean in closer, his weight shifting as he nearly whispered wanting your answer. His breath hitting the shell of your ear. "F-Five." “Half way, you are doing very well.” He praised. Those simple words, the way he was touching you enough to get you hot and heavy. You moved your hips involuntarily, trying to get some form of relief. A low chuckle escaped him, “Something wrong, little bee?” He asked and you shook your head no. “No, Papa, please, continue.” Your voice was whinier than you expected, high pitched and a little breathless. His hand left your ass, your eyes flicked up to see him remove his leather glove with his teeth putting it to the side before he spoke. “So eager to get reprimanded, I might get used to it.” He spoke and before you could comprehend it he spanked you two times in quick succession. The stinging a mix of pain and pleasure. “Seven!” You exclaimed as you held your hands steady. Trying to focus on the amber liquid rather than the feeling of large hands inching ever closer to your trembling pussy. Or the swelling you could start to feel press against your side.

“Eight!” “Nine!” Only one more, and you hadn't spilled a drop. Even though your legs were trembling, your arms felt a little sore from holding the cup, ass incredibly sore from the spanking, and not even to speak of the state of your panties. But you were doing good. Great even. “Last one, little bee, do well and I'll be able to give you something you might enjoy.” His breath hit the shell of your ear, feeling hot and intimate in a way. His words do nothing to help the state of your arousal. Only worsening as thoughts began to run through your mind. Pictures of what he might do flashing into your subconscious. When that final spank came you were shocked, jolting forward as his hand hit lower than you were expecting. Directly hitting your wet cunt. You couldn't help the strangled moan that tumbled from your lips. A rush of pain and pleasure flowing through your body. “You did so well, sorella.” His fingers languidly trailed up and down your clothed pussy, the wet fabric was sticky and clinging to every curve and fold. His fingers felt large, thick, through the cloth. “Though… It seems you have been enjoying this punishment more than anything.” A chuckle sounded out above you as his free hand picked up the glass from your hands. Taking a deep sip and letting out an appreciative sigh. “Is that why you are so clumsy, little bee? Have you been distracted by your papa?” His voice was taunting, as his hand continued his ministrations on your weeping cunt. “I-i have been doing my best.” You answered. Refusing to confess to what you both knew to be the truth. "Yes, you have.” his fingers left your cunt. A whimper escaping you at the loss.

It didn't last long though. The glass of whiskey was placed off on the coffee table before Secondo easily maneuvered you from his lap. Onto your knees in front of him. You could see the outline of his dick, straining against the black pants. Mouth watering at the sight of it. “You've been doing so well, wanting compliments no? Wanting to be seen, to be rewarded for your efforts?” He asked, his hand cradling your face almost tenderly. Like he hadn't just used it to spank you sore, to tease you over your clothes. You nodded your head yes, not trusting yourself to answer verbally. “I'll give you what you want.” His words were short before his tender touch turned to a grip. Pulling you up, as he stood smoothly. You nearly tripped but kept standing, your face in his strong grip as he led you to his desk. Turning so you were with your back towards it, he lifted you, forcing you to sit on the edge. The cool, polished wood smooth against your raw ass cheeks. When you looked up at him, you saw hunger in those mismatched eyes. A sight you had only fantasized about up till now. Licking your lips quickly, wetting them just before his lips crashed against yours.

A mix of harsh kisses, biting teeth as Secondo guided you to lay back against the desk. The kiss tasted of caramel whiskey, smooth, bitter and still sweet. His hands roaming over your hips, your waist, squeezing over your bra before they moved down. Eliciting moans and gasps from you that were swallowed up into the kiss. You couldn't wait any longer though, needing more from him than he was giving. Legs wrapping around his waist, a silent plea for him to be closer. Your hand wandered down on its own. Cupping the bulge straining in his pants. His groan didn't go unnoticed, low in his chest as your fingers applied pressure. “Such a tease, sorella.” He pulled away from the kiss. Unbuttoning his shirt as he spoke. The paint around his mouth is already starting to smudge by the sloppiness of the kiss. “I'm not a tease Papa, I want it.” You panted out, licking your lips as you watched him. The trail of hair down his chest being revealed inch by inch. The way it thickened towards the edge of his  pants. How solid his torso looked. “Not just now, ever since the library.” His words came out strained, as he worked to undo his belt. The clinking of it signaled its removal, before the zipper sounded. “I didn't tease, I was surprised.” You countered, sitting up to help him but Secondo quickly pushed you back down on the desk. “You have no clue. Clueless little bee. In that habit, with those doe eyes, with that voice, in this lingerie. You. You are a tease.” His hand wrapped into the thin fabric of your panties. bundling it up between the puffy lips of your pussy. Giving it a harsh tug causing you to moan at the friction against your clit. That seemed to be the catalyst, he ripped the panties down, letting them fall to the ground at his feet. His left hand pulled his erection from the confines of those sinful pants, apparently having gone commando. A deep groan escaped him as he gave himself a few tugs. You watched, in awe at the size of it. The length was impressive, sure, but the girth was what really made you shiver with anticipation. 

“Seeing you, on your knees in front of me, I barely kept my composure.” Secondo slipped the head of his cock between your folds. Coating it with the slick and rubbing the tip against your clit teasingly. Biting your lip, you looked up, his words a confession. He wanted control, wanted tidiness and regulations. Yet he also seemed to get irrevocably turned on by your disruption of it all. You were, in his eyes, a perfect disruption. A groan escaped his mouth as the head of his cock bumped against your clit. “Please.” You begged, voice high pitched as you moved your hips slightly, creating more friction for yourself. “Such an eager thing. All wet from getting punished, pleading for your papa. Begging so nicely I might just give you what you want.” He said lowly. Using one of his large hands to splay across your lower abdomen, keeping you in place with a simple pin of his hand. The right one grabbing the base of his dick to line the tip up with your entrance. Pushing inside, the head slipped in with a delicious stretch, your eyes closing on their own. Teeth sinking into your bottom lip as he pushed in deeper. It was slow, you could feel every inch stretching you further with restraint. He was holding back, you could feel it, making sure you felt him completely. When his hips met yours and he was fully inside, Secondo groaned from the back of his throat. You could feel the fabric from his pants against your ass, the zipper a stark, cold contrast to the softness of them. “Look at me, Sorella.” He commanded, your eyes snapping open to meet his. His pupils were blown wide, the blue-ish gray and white almost completely absorbed by the black. His right hand, moving to grab your thigh, as he gave an experimental thrust. “Such a good sister. Doing exactly as her papa asks.” He said as a moan tumbled from your lips at the friction. The praise went straight to your core, feeling your walls clamp around his thickness.

“You like that huh, like to get praised?” He almost chuckled as he pulled his hips back. “Just your praise.” You managed to utter a little breathless as you felt him pulling out until the head of his dick was just inside of you. His right hand traveled down your leg, reaching your knee he pulled it away from his waist. Lifting it up to rest your leg against his shoulder. “I shall give you just that then.” he said, pressing a kiss to your calf before he plunged back inside of you with a force you hadn’t expected. A strangled moan escaped you as the air left your lungs. It was the start of a grueling pace. His thrust hitting deep, each one punctuated by a moan or a whine tumbling from your lips. His left hand pressed down on your lower abdomen. “I can feel myself inside you like this.” He groaned, leaning forward ever so slightly, “So tight. You are welcoming me so well. Like you were made for me.” He praised breathlessly. You clamped down at his words, earning you another moan from him. Leaning down further he captured your lips in a hungry kiss. Your hands reaching out, right arm wrapping around his shoulder as your tongues slid against each other in synchronicity. Left hand on his cheek, holding his face close. Your left knee was pressed up to your chest, the new position felt like he got even deeper, hitting that spongy area inside of you that caused white spots to infiltrate your vision. An incredibly wanton moan bubbled past your lips, being swallowed up by him. 

The only sound that filled the office was that of his hips meeting yours, sloppy and wet from your pussy. Paired with the moans and groans you shared in the kiss. Teeth clashing together every so often. It was electrifying. When he pulled away from the kiss he moved down, licking, kissing and biting his way down to your neck before moving away. You thought he never looked hotter. Completely undone, licking his shining lips. His papal paints now completely smudged away from his lips, black and white mixing around to create a darker gray. His breath comes out in pants and grunts with each thrust. Fanning against your lips and sending a shiver down your spine. His right hand moved up your side, reaching your flimsy bralette and fingers pushing underneath. Squeezing at the soft flesh, massaging your breast in his hand. Fingers reach to tweak at your nipple, causing another surge of pleasure through your body.

You dropped your left hand, finding his hand perched on your lower abdomen. The familiar knot growing inside of you, tightening with each thrust, each meeting of your hips to his. “Papa, I- fuck- touch me- more- please-” You beg, sentences cut short but it was clear what you wanted. A smirk graced his stoic features, his hand slid down and towards your weeping cunt, “look at me when you cum. I want to see how good your papa makes you feel.” His voice is strained, low and deep in his chest. When his pointer and middle finger started to strum slowly at your clit you could feel you were done for. Pussy started to clench around his dick that kept on hitting that spot perfectly. It was almost too much, almost. You had to force yourself to keep your eyes open.

Secondo continued to apply pressure to your sensitive clit, moving his fingers in tight circles as he watched your every reaction. A string of curse words fell from your lips as that knot tightened, clamping down as he never seemed to falter in his pace. The muscles in your thighs twitched as you felt it snap inside you. Jaw slack as you moaned, vision blurry with pleasure. Waves of it rushing through you like white hot lava under your skin. Your walls spasmed around him as he fucked you through the orgasm. When you came down, however, he didn’t let up. His fingers continued to work, as his pace picked up, nearing painful. Though the pain was mixed with undeniable pleasure. Not giving a moment of respite, you could feel the second orgasm building quickly. 

“I am going to fill you up.” Secondo groaned through gritted teeth. “And you will keep it inside you until after mass.” his pace faltered, becoming less controlled, more wild. “And if you spill a single drop. You will be punished again.” The idea of this not being a one time thing made you excited. “Yes, yes, please give it to me.” You spoke as you nodded your head. He picked up speed, you could feel his dick twitch inside of your sensitive pussy. Hips meeting yours, his fingers never faltered as he tried to push you over the edge of orgasming again. Still sensitive you could feel it all, this time you couldn’t even bring out a sound as it washed over you. Splotches entering your field of vision as white hot pleasure ran through you again. When your pussy clamped around Secondo’s dick you felt him reach his peak. Hot cum filling you up in spurts and twitches with a loud groan of your name. His hips stilled, slow thrusts as he emptied himself inside of you. His breathing was ragged as he stood up straighter, moving your left leg off of his shoulder gently. Still, with his softening dick inside of you. You watched his chest rise and fall, trying to match your own unruly breathing to his to calm down. Feeling tired and completely fucked out. There was a moment of serenity in the quiet, matched breathing. A peaceful moment as you kept his gaze.

A few seconds of pure devotion.

Secondo was the first to move again, slowly pulling out you hissed. Feeling empty and sensitive. You clamped around nothing. trying to keep his seed from spilling out of you. “You should get ready for mass.” Secondo said though his eyes were trained on your clenching pussy. “I don’t have a clean habit, or my panties.” you whispered, still trying to catch your breath. “A ghoul will get them.” Secondo spoke as his left hand reached out. His fingers find your entrance easily, dipping his middle and pointer inside causing a pained whimper from you. Giving a few lazy thrusts with his fingers he smirked as you squirmed away. “Not a drop. Remember?” He said before pulling his fingers out again. “Does that count as a spilled drop?” You asked as you could see the mixed fluids on those thick, long fingers. “Not if you don’t waste it.” He held them up and moved them to your lips. You opened your mouth wordlessly, welcoming those fingers and cleaning them off. Tongue moving over his fingers, in between and taking every drop of what he would give you. A strange combination of his and your arousal. His eyes darkened with lust as he watched you work his fingers like it could have been his dick. When he took them from your mouth he seemed a little torn.

“I will see you at mass.” He spoke as he started to button his shirt. You watched him get dressed before he disappeared into a different room. A ghoul entered the office with your clothes a few moments later. You covered yourself, a little embarrassed at your near nudity. Though the ghoul didn’t seem to mind, a knowing smile on his face. So, you got dressed after he left, getting ready to go to mass as you did everything you could to not spill a drop of Secondo’s cum. Sitting in the front pew at mass with the left leg crossed over the right, listening to him preaching about the dark lord. Squirming in your seat as you tried to keep everything inside. Switching to cross your right over your left you felt it. The slow drip of liquid pooling in your panties. Your breathing hitched, and your eyes met Secondo, a wicked glint in his eyes as he knew.

It was going to be a long mass.

[turtleblogatlast]

hey!!! this is less of an ask and more of a fic rec tbh 😭 but have you read 'I May be Invisible, but I Still Look Good" by Dandy over on Ao3???? It's after the movie AND Leo-centric and like he gets cursed so his spirit is ripped out of his body. It's like 125k words of wonderful storytelling

OH- but for an actual question, do you have and fic recs?? or any AU's you think people should go check out?

I tried answering this before and it erased my reply orz

ANYWAY YES I HAVE read this and I absolutely love it with every fiber of my being.❤️ 100% one of my top fics to read in this fandom that I even go back to for a reread more than once. The characters are perfectly done and the set up for the story is believable with a fantastic payoff, highly highly highly recommend to anyone who hasn’t read it yet.❤️

As for recs, I’ve always been terrible at giving recs since my memory is very bad especially for ones I haven’t read in a while.😭 Off the top of my head I can recommend (note these are practically entirely Leo-centric since he’s my special guy you understand (the others aren’t forgotten at all though!!!) - and most of these are very very well known so you’ve likely already read them…):

[Note many of these are unfinished and may remain that way - please no one harass the writers for more, let them write at their own pace if they choose to write at all]

- The Neon Void by sugarpastels is absolutely incredible, the dramatic irony of it all as we follow Leo in the state he’s in and see just how broken all the Hamatos are by his “death” is just 👌👌👌 The fact that this places with one of my favorite tropes aka “Leo being in the Prison Dimension longer than canon” is just so good. Genuinely a thoroughly gripping tale that I highly recommend. It’s not complete yet (a lot of this list isn’t) but what is there is so amazing please read (though you most likely have read it already haha)

- little kid with a big death wish and firefight by remrose are another two you’ve likely seen but by god are they worth the read. Firefight isn’t done yet but it and death wish are so amazingly well written and really go into how trauma affects people differently and how ties with family can be tested in traumatic situations. Hard subjects definitely but very maturely done. (Also I misread firefight as firelight for way too long before I realized it-)

- Power Up and Times Five by pickedcarrotsandradish are both unfinished but I can’t care because what we were given is so good that I’m fine with them as they are. Both deal with Leo’s insecurities and bad feelings about himself and, very importantly, the fics go into how these insecurities establish a base for Leo’s very real flaws and how those flaws push him to act the way he does. Very interesting and compelling stuff here!! Power Up especially does really cool things for the boys’ mystic power ups, especially Leo’s, and I loved reading about the ins and outs of what they could do.

- Race Against Life, Death, and the EPF by Cass_Phoenix is just so engaging to read??? Like I love the entire set up for it - it’s feels so fresh and like you’re in Leo’s desperate situation yourself. I was so excited whenever a new chapter came out because the atmosphere was so well done.

- A Mixed Bag by GreatlyBlessed is SHOCKINGLY not Leo-centric for once haha. It’s not completed, but again, like the others above it is so good that I recommend it anyway. This story is actually a crossover between four sets of TMNT (‘87, ‘03, ‘12, and Rise) and the dynamics set up in it are SO fun I love it. Team 2 is my fave because you have literally all my faves on that team how could I not?? I also highly appreciate that everyone gets a chance to shine and that there’s no bashing at all, they’re all just very much in character and it’s refreshing to read ❤️❤️❤️

There’s a LOAD more that I could recommend I’m sure but I don’t remember them off the top of my head at the moment.😭 If I remember I’ll come back and add them in!

(Forgot about AU’s- honestly there’s some that I see and catch up on when I see them but there’s just so many that it’s a bit difficult to keep track of sometimes! I’d have to go around and fully look through many before having a solid answer haha! The ones I do see are always so well done though, I may come back and add them here if I remember 😅)

[lavendermoonlitskies]

I’ve felt so sick to my stomach debating whether or not to continue contributing to and interacting with the fandom. I’ve heard different perspectives on the matter and I don’t necessarily disagree with any of it. I feel guilty for being upset over some of the things I’m upset over. I’ve been in tears consistently over the last couple days thinking no. Stop crying. This is a stupid reason to cry. You’re being selfish. Get over it. Truth is, season 3 is already written, and Neil can be fired from the show, and if that happens, I feel like I can breathe.

until then, I still don’t know. The points made in the post I reblogged before this about how once it’s out in the world, art belongs to more than just the artist, make me feel at least a little bit better about not leaving, but I’m still feeling some guilt about that.

This fandom is wonderful. You’re all so lovely and talented and kind and leaving it all behind after it has helped me so much in the last year would make me feel awful. I graduated college in 2023 and the transition has been very difficult. My friends are mostly all out of state, I’m still living at home, I can’t drive yet, I don’t know where my life is going. When I discovered this show over the summer, it gave me something to be excited about. People to talk to. A way to connect with what feels like a community. It made me rediscover my love for writing. I haven’t been this excited about a piece of media in years. It hasn’t even been a year since the release of season 2 and this fandom has already given me so much.

but now I feel like I can’t share that joy without contributing to something awful. I feel guilty for still wanting a season 3 because I know there are people out there who view that desire as selfish and maybe I don’t entirely disagree. I don’t give a shit about Neil, but I give a shit about this fandom and the story that he is unfortunately a co-creator on and I can’t help it.

I don’t know, I’m in actual tears writing this. I don’t think I’ve ever gotten this personal on my tumblr and just like my last post(pinned) I don’t know if I have a point or if I’m just rambling again.

[nerdyvocals]

9 People to Know Better (except I'm not tagging 9 people)

I don't normally do tag games, but I got tagged in this twice (by @jealous-kippen and @remmixx, my beloveds <3) so here I am! (also as I'm writing this out I am realizing that while both posts were titled the same way, it looks like they had different question prompts??? So I'm just gonna combine the two)

Favorite Color: Purple! Any shade will have my heart but I am partial to more red-toned purples. (PV, if that means anything to anyone who sees this other than me, you know who you are)

Currently Reading: Three things! In terms of actual books, I've been slowly making my way through the Riordanverse since my university did The Lightning Thief in my second year (first school in my state to do it once the rights were released!) since I somehow never got into Percy Jackson as a kid, and I'm currently on Son of Neptune. I'm also one like my third or fourth re-read of Eurydice by Sara Ruhl, since that's the play I'm designing the costumes for for my senior project. And in terms of fanfic, I woke up to a notification about this yesterday and Actually Screeched.

Last Song: Dial Drunk by Noah Kahan (ft. Post Malone), which was a bit of an accident. I use siri to request music while I'm driving and I asked for Dial Drunk and was singing along until I got jumpscared by the slight difference before Post Malone's verse. Although if you look at my spotify, the ROTPL album has been on repeat for weeks.

Currently Watching (Series): I've been hyperfixated on ROTPL and have watched it over a dozen times at this point, which is probably not healthy, so I put on NCIS last night for background noise while I ate dinner and accidentally watched like six episodes.

Currently Watching (Movie): Saw the Barbie movie the night before the actual opening with my coworkers (We don't cross picket lines people! I was not asked nor invited by any company, and I paid full price for my ticket. There's a one-screen theatre in the town where I'm doing summer stock, this relic from the 50's, and they were able to get access to the film a day early and did a special first come first serve premiere.) and we all sobbed the entire way through.

Current Obsession: Rise of the Pink Ladies. Full stop. I'd seen clips of it when it first aired in April but I was iffy on it in spite of how good it looked. Like most, I'm a little tired of reboots and remakes, and while I did clock Cynthia as being queer within two seconds, (I believe my exact words were "That's either a very butch lesbian or the eggiest egg to ever egg.") I was Convinced it was a queerbait situation. Plus I was nearing finals and didn't have time to get into a new show. But then Crushing Me was trending on tiktok and I realized this was not queerbait, so I put it on to have something playing while I packed for summer stock and it's been the only thing I can think about since mid May. It got me writing fanfic again for the first time in years, if that tells you anything. Speaking of,

Currently Working On: A follow-up to my previous fic, Steady, Steady! I wanted to have it up this week, but it is a behemoth. I'm a little over halfway through my plot outline and I'm at 10,441 words. Fun fact, this will be my longest single-chapter fic so far. Not just in the fandom, not just on AO3, but ever (so far!)

No-Pressure Tagging: @merely-a-player, @penguin-writes-books, @el-fandom-birb, @marley-barnes112, @isweartheyregayyourhonor, and @look-at-those-niceass-rocks (since I've already dragged you back to tumblr kicking and screaming)

[steddieunderdogfics]

This week’s writer spotlight feature is: Atalia_Gold! @ataliagold has 77 fics on Ao3 in the Stranger Things fandom and all of them are in the Steddie tag.

Our anonymous nominator recommends the following works by @ataliagold:

My, My, Those Eyes Like Fire

Keep My Hand In Yours

I Can Wait For You At The Bottom

Oh Darling, Please Be Mine

The Wreckage Of You I No Longer Reside In

"Atalia_Gold has written fics I just go back and read over and over again. I love the way they write the characters and all the very different universes and situations they end up in. One of my favorite authors of all time!" -- Anonymous

Below the cut, @ataliagold answered some questions about their writing process and some of their recommended work!

Why do you write Steddie?

I love the pairing so much. Steve is my favourite character ever, I loved him since series 1, but I never had anyone to ship him with until series 4 as Harringrove just wasn’t for me, so when Eddie came along I just thought wow they’re so perfect together.

What’s your favorite trope to READ?

Hurt/comfort, sick/injured Steve and Eddie doing the comforting/caretaking is my absolute favourite, but there’s a lot of stuff I love to read.

What’s your favorite trope to WRITE?

Same as the above, I love Steve so much but I love to hurt him haha. (So long as there’s a happy ending!)

What’s your favorite Steddie fic?

You’re Divine by Oonionchiver. I love so many of their fics, but this one consumed my soul and was a big contributor to me wanting to write my own fics. A close second would be Take the Money and Run by thisapplepielife - so damn good.

Is there a trope you’re excited to explore in a future work but haven’t yet?

I have a modern AU idea, and I have done one modern AU before but this one will be quite different, the subject matter is much lighter/more humorous and I’m excited to try that - usually a lot of angst slips in even when I try to keep things light so we’ll see how that goes haha. Also planning to throw in the good old one bed trope into that, which I love reading but haven’t written before.

What is your writing process like?

…there is no process haha. I have an idea, usually a scene or a line or just a feeling, and I start writing and see what happens. I don’t plan anything ahead, I don’t write anything down that isn’t literally just the story, I don’t know how long it’ll be etc - I just start writing and see where the characters want to go. I tend to write up a chapter or a oneshot in a day (sometimes two if I’m busy), then think about it overnight, edit the next day, and then post it once I’m ready.

Do you have any writing quirks?

Maybe a couple of little ones - I’m a fan of ironically both run-on sentences and line breaks - can never have enough line breaks for me. I use them a lot to emphasize things or just because they feel right. Run-on sentences I often use to show a character being indecisive/spiraling/emotional just because it sort of reflects that state.

Do you prefer posting when you’ve finished writing or on a schedule?

…neither. I have no schedule, but I also don’t wait until I’ve finished because I’m too impatient, and I find posting chapters as soon as I’m finished quite motivating. I’m a fairly quick writer so I can usually comfortably post a few updates a week.

Which fic are you most proud of?

That’s hard. I guess it would be The Wreckage Of You I No Longer Reside In, because it was the second fic I ever wrote and the first one longer than a small oneshot. I had covid, a lot of free time on my hands, and no idea what I was doing, but people seemed to really like it and I was floored by the response it got. There’s other fics too though, like My, My Those Eyes Like Fire or Keep My Hand In Yours that come close.

How did you get the idea for Oh Darling, Please Be Mine?

This fic happened while I was writing something else that I was struggling with a bit. Oh Darling, Please Be Mine was me returning to writing something familiar, something I felt comfortable with, and I enjoyed that one. I had worked as a vet nurse before and I really wanted to write vet tech Steve and Steddie with kittens.

When writing I Can Wait For You At The Bottom, what was something you didn’t expect?

That some people would comment and tell me it was accurate to their own experiences with depression. That’s one of the heaviest fics I’ve written and it dealt with Steve seriously struggling with his mental health. I was a little worried when writing it that I wasn’t depicting depression accurately - I’ve never been diagnosed with it myself despite definitely struggling with it or something very similar before. So I just wrote from the heart and people seemed to appreciate it, and I’m glad people found it authentic.

What inspired Keep My Hand In Yours?

I’d wanted to do a post-apocalypse fic for a long time. I love that genre so much, I love the idea of these characters being completely stripped down and having to survive in a very difficult world. Also, the title is from the Noah Kahan song Everywhere, Everything, and a lot of those lyrics inspired the fic too, especially the relationship between Steve and Robin.

What was your favorite part to write from Keep My Hand In Yours?

I think the reunion scene between Robin and Steve, or the scenes with Steve and Eddie at the cabin by the lake. I’d had those scenes in my mind for months before even starting to write that fic, and couldn’t wait to get to them.

How do/did you feel writing My, My, Those Eyes Like Fire?

I loved writing that fic. For me it was just such fun to write - I love sword fights/ancient history/that whole…genre. So I really loved writing that one, and it was literally entirely inspired by Joe Keery’s lovely gladiator outfit.

What was the most difficult part of writing The Wreckage Of You I No Longer Reside In?

That one wasn’t difficult, it really flowed. The most difficult part was actually maybe just sharing it - for so long I was terrified of putting my work out there, because I was convinced people would hate it or it wasn’t good enough/nowhere near as good as other authors’ works.

Do you have a favorite scene and/or line from any of your fics?

It’s hard to think of one, there’s so many that are special to me for different reasons, but I think it would have to the be the Steve and Robin reunion scene from Keep My Hand In Yours: In the distance, two figures approached. Steve ran to them, caution thrown aside – he couldn’t make out their faces from here, but he knew one of them was Robin. He’d know her in the dark; would know her even if he were blind and deaf. One of the figures broke away from the other, running for Steve. They met in the middle of a dirt road at the end of the world, Steve scooping his best friend into his arms and dropping to his knees in the dust.

Do you have any upcoming projects or fics you’d like to share/promote?

I have five fics ready to go for the Summer Things Fest, they’ll be released anonymously at first and then creators revealed a bit later, so keep an eye out for those later in July! Other than that, my current WIP We Made Universes Out Of Bitten Lips And Broken Hands is nearing the end at the time of writing this - a few more chapters to go and that’ll be complete. I’m away for the whole of July so not starting anything big until I get back, but I have a few ideas brewing, including a modern AU where Eddie and Dustin drag Steve along to New Zealand (where I’m from) to visit Lord of the Rings filming locations, and I’m quite excited to write that later in the year - planning at this stage for it to be upbeat and fun.

Outside of these questions, Is there anything YOU would like to add?

Just a thank you to anyone who has ever read my fics and dropped kudos or comments, I never expected people to even read my fics let alone enjoy them, so I’m really grateful to everyone who has. There’s some massively talented people here and their fics have helped me in so many ways over the years. And I’m happy to have met some lovely people through writing fics too :)

Thank you to our author, @ataliagold, and our anonymous nominator! See more Atalia_Gold's of works featured on our page throughout the day!

Writer’s Spotlight is every Wednesday! Want to nominate an author? You can nominate them here!

[sukimas]

As someone who is- at best- a Touhou secondary, can you offer any insight as to why there appears to be/is so much drama surrounding whether or not Merry is Yukari? “Seemingly Unrelated Character B grows up into/otherwise becomes Character A” is not an especially world-shattering story beat, and after reading your document it seems unbelievably obvious by 2005.

There's nothing that I can say is the overall reason as sadly I'm not a mind-reader, but I have some theories (some of which may be true in parallel, some of which may not be true at all):

A.) Touhou is a series that many fans believe is highly up to interpretation (due to the fact that they are otaku unused to literary elements such as the unreliable narrator; you can see this in, for example, responses to Umineko) so there's a degree of resistance to anything being "obviously intended".

B.) Many Touhou fans enjoy having opinions on things without reading the works that apply to these things; the music CDs in particular are a case where "fans of fans" are very common. This isn't necessarily a problem when discussing what people like, but it runs into issues when discussing, say, authorial intent.

C.) Youkai are kind of nasty, and Yukari is a particularly nasty variation. Many people don't like the idea of humans in Touhou becoming youkai in general.

D.) Due to B, as well as the obscurity of the two works that are written directly from Yukari's perspective, many people have an incorrect idea of Merry's personality, Yukari's personality, or both; this leads them to have an incorrect idea of the differences between the two. This is the "well, even if Yukari was Merry once, is there anything really left of her since she's so different?" objection.

E.) Many people see the idea of Merry ending up as a youkai as something tragic- they enjoy the idea of her and Renko going on adventures in their modern day forever. This is despite the fact that their sense of ennui in and disgust with the modern world is more apparent with each CD published.

F.) Also coming from E and B, people often have an interpretation of the club members as "innocent" and "childlike"; there's a general degree of belief in sweet, innocent, childish whimsy being what drives their actions in the CDs. Yukari being self-admittedly too tired to have stupid fun like the members of the Scarlet Devil Mansion going to the moon on their idiot rocket can seem like a contradiction in terms, and makes it seem "tragic".

G.) Also coming from E, many people seem to have the mistaken opinion that in order for Merry to have become a youkai, something terrible must have happened to Renko, and she's really torn up about it. Either that, or that she'll never see her again- this latter is common even in more level-headed interpretations, but makes little sense with, for example, the idea of Yuyuko Saigyouji existing. Anyway, people don't like to imagine the club being torn apart so rudely.

H.) An extension from G- people don't believe that Merry could ever be or become a youkai without harming Renko as they simply don't seem to have a strong metaphysical understanding of youkai from other Touhou works (and this idea is often played up for drama in popular fan media).

Generally speaking, it's mostly "she's so unlike this, so either this can't be true or if it was true it would be a terrible tragedy. and i can't stand terrible tragedies, so it can't be true" as large segments of the Hifuu fandom are a little bit immature about the idea of anything ever changing. In a sense, it's kind of treated like Class S yuri. Add to this a good helping of people not reading and not believing that anything not stated in so many words can be true, and you get a perfect storm of idiocy.

[weiwuxianismybae]

My fandom pet peeves

Lan Wangji’s dislike of Jiang Wanyin

So, I dived back into the world of fanfiction and was quickly reminded of all the fanon things I hate. Starting with Lan Wangji’s unreasonable dislike of Jiang Cheng. In order to promote "Wei Wuxian's little brother Jiang Cheng", Lan Wangji's very good reasons to hate Jiang Cheng are reduced to some petty, stupid bs like "He [LWJ] didn't like how often Jiang Cheng hit Wei Wuxian." And later on we get this gem: "After some time LWJ understood that violence is JC's way of showing affection." Like, wtf? If my younger sibling (and I have one) showed their affection through violence, I wouldn't see it as love, but as abuse, 'cause that's what it is. And I'm not talking about the normal sibling fighting because that's not what Wei Wuxian and Jiang Cheng's relationship is. I mean, just reread the Cloud Recesses Study arc. The only thing Jiang Cheng seems to know is how to belittle and criticise Wei Wuxian. I'm not gonna lie, I found some of the remarks quite funny (I'm a passive aggressive bitch myself), but when that's the only thing that comes out of Jiang Cheng's mouth, it really starts to eat at you. I deeply respect Wei Wuxian's ability to not take it seriously. And when Lan Wangji’s actual grievances with Jiang Cheng are stated, we get the "but he [JC] still loved his brother" nonsense. Lan Wangji’s real reasons to dislike Jiang Cheng are as follows: abandoning Wei Wuxian, being the prime reason and catalyst of Wei Wuxian's death, spreading hateful rumours about Wei Wuxian (who else could have been the source of "WWX is responsible for Jiang Clan's massacre" if not the only surviver, besides Wei Wuxian, of the said massacre?), and hunting down the so-called demonic cultivators because "what if that's actually Wei Wuxian." I commend Lan Wangji’s restraint, because if it had been me, I would have long since punched that guy in the nose. And I absolutely love Lan Wangji’s attitude of "I won't look at you; I won't speak to you. Sizhui, you may speak on my behave."

"Lans only love once"

Please tell me I'm not the only one who gets toothache whenever I read this. When I came across it for the first time, I didn’t think much of it. Like, at first, I thought it was cute, but then it started grinding on my nerves. Why? Because it diminishes Lan Wangji’s love, trust and devotion to Wei Wuxian to a mere fate thing that is beyond your control. He is already being reduced to some block of ice (by the mob in mdzs and the fandom), and now you also simplify such an important part to his character. Like, where did this even come from? Yes, we have the famous Lan "I will leave this world, because my love is no longer in it" An and Lan Wangji, but that's it when it comes to die-hard romantics in the Lan Clan. The story of Qingheng-jun and Madam Lan is not really romantic (I'm not gonna speculate on what there was and wasn't between them because Lan Xichen telling Wei Wuxian about his parents had a different purpose, namely, to esteblish Lan Wangji as someone who doesn't just listen to what his elders have to say, but as someone who seeks to understand and then judge the reasoning by his own moral beliefs). And that's it. So where is "Lans only love once" coming from??

So why did I write all of this? Well, I'm just tired of seeing this over and over again. Aren't we all so creative? Come up with new head-canons (so that I have more things to criticise /jk) or stick to canon characteristics. Please.

[sgiandubh]

Imma need an in-depth breakdown of Puff please! And I’m not being sarcastic either. Puff pre-dates my time in the outlander fandom.

Regards,

Your curious anon.

Dear Puffy Curious Anon,

If my cantankerous boss would have summoned me at 03:03 pm EEST (when your request landed in my inbox), just to tell me "Imma need an in-depth breakdown of the Greek trade unions' position on the current critical understaffing of the HoReCa sector", I would have politely answered "yes, ma'am, when is the deadline". I would have then turned on my heels, rolled my eyes, sworn like a drunk sailor under my breath (fuck my life comes to mind, pardon my French) and quickly be done with it.

You, bless your Anon heart, wrote: "Imma need an in-depth breakdown of Puff, please". Wee difference, Curious Anon: you are not my cantankerous boss. That being said, since the question has been asked by several people in the comment threads of the day's posts, I am gonna give you my two cents on Queen Pufflander, even if you've been around before I even knew this weird place existed. And hopefully put to rest this nonsense forever (wishful thinking, doubt it will happen).

Once upon a time, when S&C's bantering was the plat du jour on Twitter and this fandom a considerably less toxic place, Puff the Magic Dragon of the US East Coast was one of the Queen Bees of Shipperville. Her blog was witty and no-nonsense (if a tad verbose) and, as *urv, she quickly earned her fair share of side performers: Stella and Deep Throat (SOURCES) or the tarot reader(s) immediately come to mind. People loved Puff and that is only fair, to be honest: I bet the farm she was great fun. Little by little, information traded in DMs started to pile up in her famed Vault, from which she was generously sharing, from time to time, sibylline rants ("maybe they did or maybe they didn't, but don't worry, something happened and all shall soon be revealed"). I can critique that forever and a day and tell you that all this sent people's expectations up the roof and beyond, of course. But, again: I was not here. It is unfairly easy to judge all these things with a historian's eye, and people who lived to tell the tale are far more entitled than me to comment their fandom experience, circa 2015.

When the whole Shatner/Watchtower baliverne started (early 2016, if memory serves) things ugly escalated and rather quickly so. People started jumping ship. With McSideburns already in the house (EIFF comes to mind and a certain poignant S&C penguin picture, too), enter Flukenzie Floozy. Thus, after IFH, Puffy decided to pack her crystal ball & tent and move to greener pastures on Wordpress. There, she held court with a keen eye for the Byzantine politicking of this fandom, not unlike what Perfidious Albion did with regard to the Thirteen Rebelling Colonies, after that Boston Tea Party. Her main moments of intersection with the rest of the shipper community are Covfefe Pics (of course) and Remarkable Week-end (of course). With regard to Covfefe, she quickly cried wolf, but by the time Remarkable Week-end happened, she pulled off a mighty witty breakdown of The Nuptial Charade of the Century. Blaze of glory was Quarantein Ha-wa-wee (of course), when she blamed S for all the world's evils and then some more. After that, she concentrated on her Neverending Feud with *urv (a Private Investigator was, at some point, hired and paid for via crowdfunding), which somehow managed to end (nevertheless) with a Report she might or might not have sent to S, "for further consideration".

As all good prophets, Puffy finally went into Occultation circa 2021, not without warning us that she was torn between Gay Sam & SamCait intellectual traditions, with a wee penchant for the first (reason why I completely ditched her peddling, because IYKYK).

I can understand why people might think I could be Puffy. I am, however, very sure about my own identity, whereabouts and creed: to state the opposite would really, really be mental. I fully assumed my responsibility and went ahead to actually prove you, this morning, I wasn't. Reading her rants was useful, but also taxing. I doubt Stella and Deep Throat were anything else but narrative helpers in a sophisticated Greimas actantial model. Something I would never do, for example: I am confident enough not to need any crutches. And I am very, very sorry for this word vomit: it should come, perhaps, as solace its length could never compete with Puff's storytelling marathons.

To wash my sins (not really: because I really love that picture), here's S,C, a penguin and a cakebox (?), at EIFF 2015. This is, you can be certain, the purest thing on this page, Anon:

[bsd-fan]

How mentally unwell you think Chuuya is?

Your takes on his character are the best so i will be glad to hear your take on this

PD: thank you for the perfect analysis you do <3

Hey! Thank you so much for your kind words 💖

And I’m really sorry to be answering this so late but life has been crazy this last weeks. I want to say that when I got the notification of this question I was at work so I just read the first part and I was /Convinced/ someone has asked me how mentally unwell I was and I laughed out loud because the answer is a lot but I couldn’t figure out why someone would ask it like that 😭 Then I realized it was about chuuya and everything made more sense lol.

Now going with the actual question (and once again apologizing if something doesn’t make sense because English is not my native language.

Chuuya’s mental state is kind of difficult to talk about. The easy answer is that he is in a really bad mental state but it’s a little more complicated than that. Chuuya’s has gone through so much trauma, basically since the moment he started living everything in his life has been a big traumatic experience after another. It has gotten so bad that there’s a running joke in the fandom about Chuuya’s lack of reaction to fucked up things, because that’s just another Thursday in his life. He is /used/ to this horrible things happening to him. We need to understand that there’s no such a thing as a little trauma. But chuuya’s case? Is outrageous. He was experimented in, treated like a weapon, deshumanized by everyone, constantly fighting with his own feelings of inhumanity, he was used and betrayed by the people he gave everything to protect, he made new friends that loved and appreciate him only for them to also be taken away from him, worse than that, they were killed /because/ they were his friends, he had to see them die, he had to hold his own pain and instead be comforting while he saw something fucking horrible, he was hurt, physically, mentally, he was poisoned, tortured and hit by a literal black hole, he saw more people he loved die, the same year later he once again lost his friends during the dragon’s head conflict and the worse part? Shitty things are /still/ happening to him

So no, no one could go through all of that and be mentally intact, it doesn’t matter how mentally strong they are. The pure amount of trauma that Chuuya went through in three days would break any other person and that’s just a minuscule part of his life. And that’s not even the worse part of it, I said it before but Chuuya’s core is all about humanity and he find his humanity in the people that he loves. That’s the kind of person he is and is devastating to realize that this mentality is the only thing that keeps him standing while at the same time being the thing that is destroying him. He was stripped of almost every decision in his life, he is at the worst place he can be in, forced to go against his whole fucking personality, his belief system and his moral code and he can’t leave because that would go against all his character. So chuuya endures, and endures and endures. He takes every hit, he has renounced to vulnerability, he has renounced to the right of being afraid, he has renounced to the right of stepping back. He has internalized that he is strong so he /needs/ to protect the people that is not. In order to protect his people (and his humanity) he needs to be reliable, he needs to be unwavering, he needs to stand still even when everyone else is already in the floor. He has lost such a basic human right as giving up. He doesn’t now how to do it, he /can’t/ do it because people depend on him. And it’s really a tragic paradox because this is what moves him but is takes so much of him. And all for what? He keeps losing people he loves, at the end there’s no difference. All this autocontradiction is killing him, he chose the mafia because the bonds with the people there, because his bonds with the sheep means something to him. Because his humanity is there, not in the organization but in the people that is part of it. He chose the mafia because that means choosing his humanity but the mafia is the kind of organization that works around deshumanizing people, so what’s the point of all of that. He is surrounded by people, he loves and is loved by people but he still is so unbearably lonely.

Now, what makes chuuya different from other characters? Chuuya’s resilience really is a scary thing. He is brave, he takes everything the world gives him and retaliates just as hard. Even when he has gone through hell and back, he still is full of vitality, he is still so hungry for life, he still enjoys all the little things he can get. Even when he knows that the worlds is a cruel place, even when he knows that there are bad people and that fucked up things happen, he never grew to hate the world because he clings to the good things, no matter how small they are. Because it doesn’t matter if he’s using corruption and bleeding from every hole, or feeling like his bones are being pulverized by gravity, it doesn’t matter that he loses the humanity he so desperately clings to, if by doing that he can protect the people that he loves. Is not that chuuya is mentally well, he is not emotionally intelligent (actually he’s horrible at it, it only seems like he is because most of the time he is being compared with Dazai who is far worse) but he is probably the most resilient character in bsd. Chuuya is strong, he is a fighter. He will fight for his place in this world, he will fight the unfairness of all, he will fight the senseless of life.

I also feel like it’s important to add that chuuya has a lot of interesting copying mechanisms and while most of them are certainly not healthy, it’s also what keeps him moving. Regarding all his trauma, I feel like it’s important to talk about how chuuya just never thinks of certain hurtful stuff. He just put all the pain in a mental box and hides it away. Chuuya doesn’t seem as affected by his trauma as other characters because he is hyper fixated in going ahead, he never looks back. He just keeps going forward BUT it doesn’t matter how much he advances, it doesn’t matter how fast he goes, all that trauma, pain and contradictions will catch up on him one day and it will be a terrible sight. Because my boy doesn’t know when to stop, he doesn’t know when he’s had enough, he thinks that limits are just kind suggestions that he can ignore.

So in summary Chuuya is an accident waiting to happen. He is more less stable at first glance, because he has copying mechanisms and a strong mentality and a otherworldly resilience but he also sucks at dealing with his own trauma, he is self destructive, and a living contradiction and that’s gonna wear him down someday. True to his character, his contradictions are fighting between them to keep some kind of weird balance but that won’t last. So, Chuuya is definitely mentally unwell.

Whoa that was longer than what I expected, sorry for that.

[bleedingichorhearts]

𝐆𝐚𝐥𝐚𝐜𝐭𝐢𝐜 𝐒𝐡𝐚𝐝𝐨𝐰𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐈𝐈

𝕬𝖚𝖙𝖍𝖔𝖗: Apologies, I am in some different fandoms as well.

𝕾𝖚𝖒𝖒𝖆𝖗𝖞: You make your way to Commanders Burnside office all while bumping into a few people on the way before and after.

TW // Hallucination.

|°ᴛᴀɢ ʟɪꜱᴛ ᴀᴘᴘʟɪᴄᴀᴛɪᴏɴ°| |°ɪᴄʜᴏʀ’ꜱ ᴀᴏ3°| |°𝕄𝕒𝕤𝕥𝕖𝕣𝕃𝕚𝕤𝕥°| • {Chapter I} • {Chapter III}

You wake up an hour later than you should since you have been informed about your 2-man mission by the Mr. Buzz Lightyear. The same Buzz that takes up only a selection of your bed, and is as stiff as a board in his sleep as you carefully move about, trying not to wake him up. Your body silently shuffling around your own room to get a bit ready for morning. Never once making the Ranger in your bed move or waking him up, but you do, however, wake up Sox.

“Ranger, it is not time for your briefing.” The orange cat quietly states to you. His dim, green optics looking up at you from the nightstand he perched himself to rest on. “You should be getting your sleep in.”

You freeze at his words, holding your breath before you look towards the robotic cat. Your eyes scanning over Buzz in your bed, carefully watching to see if he moved or not before looking over to Sox. Softly exhaling when you take note that Buzz seemed to be in a deep sleep, all that ‘not-sleeping’ stuff catching up to him.

“Figured I need to prep myself before it.” You respond, gently whispering at the cat. Your shoulders softly shrugging at Soxs’ statement. Your form relaxing a little when everything seemed to go your way right now. No one was waking up because of you.

“Ah, that makes sense.” Sox hums, almost sounding like a robotic purr. His head looking at Buzz as he scans him; his paws in front of him readjusting before he becomes a loaf. His head looking back at you before he speaks again. “Well, I hope that your briefing will go well, Ranger.”

“I hope so too.” You whisper, nodding at the cat, and take that as your cue to move around once more to ready yourself before leaving your room. The door of your room sliding open as the corridor lights nearly blind you. Your eyes rapidly blinking so you can get used to them while you walk out of your room, making sure to restrict some access. Only leaving yourself, Sox and Buzz to be able to get in or out of your room unless a higher rank wanted to get in there.

Walking down the corridor. You take in the morning as much as possible, liking the silence and the nostalgic feel it gives you. Also, there were less crowds, can’t forget about the less crowds. There was just something about it that made it much more enjoyable when you get up alone sometimes. To be able to get the morning peace all by yourself before the day starts.

Taking a turn down into a different selection of the hallway. You nearly bump into another Space Ranger, her from stepping back a little in surprise as you take a step back as well. Her body almost bumping into a big potted plant behind her. Both of you definitely not expecting to see another Ranger up and about this time of day. Usually, everyone was catching up on their z’s, resting after their missions.

“Well, I didn’t expect you to be up at this time.” The young woman says, putting her hands on her hips as you raise a brow at her. Your eyes looking her up and down in slight suspicion at her words. Taking in that she was still in the more relaxing clothing like some sweatpants and branded shirt of the space rangers. So it was clear she didn’t have to be up at this time, but yet, here she was.

“Uh… good morning to you too Izzy?” You greet her a little awkwardly, not sure how to respond to what she gave you. You were just up and about, trying to get ready and prepped up before visiting Commander Burnsides office for the mission review. Not… whatever she may be suspecting you off. You can see it in how she looks you up and down with her golden brown eyes, like she knows something you don’t.

“You and Buzz a thing?” She asks bluntly, but her tone is giddy. Her eyes amused as she tries not to bounce in her spot.

“What?”

“What?!”

You almost jump at the sound of the robot voice as it huffs and puffs in your mind. Clearly, not expecting the voice to return as you had almost thought it was just a bad dream. Yet, you push on. Curious on why this Ranger would think such a thing and choose to ignore anything more that robotic voice might interrupt you with.

“You know, like…” The woman pauses and tries to gesture at you so you have a better chance of getting what she’s saying. Which you do understand, it’s just the question was bold, unexpected and well… can be rather inappropriate as well.

“No, we are not together if that is what you're inquiring about.” You answer her, looking her up and down once more. Wanting to make sure she got the facts right. You didn’t want any false rumors going around now.

“…You sure?” She asks, extending the word ‘sure’ a bit with a slight pitch in her tone. Wanting her own curiosity’s straight. “I saw him walk into your room and never leave…”

“Ah.” You click your tongue at that. Now knowing where she got her suspicions from. “I offered him my room to sleep in. He looked way too tired to even attempt to go back to his own room. He looked sleep deprived, most likely was.”

“Oh… nothing more?” She pushes a bit, wiggling her eyebrows just a tiny bit as if there was something going on between you and Buzz. She could honestly be a pain in the butt sometimes.

“No, nothing more.” You deny with a tired sigh and a shake of your head for more effect. You hope she won’t say anything about that, but knowing youngsters… they like to talk, and they like to talk a lot. So in hopes to quiet her mind a bit you ask her a question in return. “Why? You think me and him would be a great match or something?”

“Well, I mean…” She pauses with a grin, rubbing the back of her head. “You both seem very compatible on the field. You guys work together fluently. I haven’t seen a time when you guys failed when you two are paired.”

You stand there for a second, taking in her words before slightly nodding. You do remember the times when you were paired up with Buzz and set some mission records up because you two would have done them so quickly and efficiently. It came as a surprise to almost everyone on the base as both of you liked to go solo most of the time. “Loners” some others would say.

“Is that all?” You push her back. Wondering if there was much more to it. You know sometimes she likes to play Cupid, but she never really had the guts to try such a thing on you until now, until she had some sort of evidence.

“No, that is all. What are you up to?” She asks, changing the topic. Finding your suddenness to be up in the early morning a more interesting topic to talk about. Her eyes looking at you more curiously.

You hum at her before gesturing at her to follow you. Realizing that you don’t have any time now to talk to her while just standing in the hallway, but you can while walking with her towards Commanders Burnsides office. “I have a mission to do soon.”

“Mission? Is it solo?” She questions, following you by your side. Putting her hands back at her sides too. “Squaded?”

“I was hoping it was solo, but I hear that is not the case.” You hum, looking forward to watch where you are going. “I believe I’m being paired up with a cadet.”

“A cadet?” She says, sounding rather puzzled. Looking in front of her for a moment. “You are at a higher rank than that, are you training them perhaps?”

“I’m unsure.” You hum, turning down another hallway with her still following right beside you. Commander Burnside's office just a few more corridors down.

“You are not that great with new rangers, just like Buzz.” She laughs a little at that, shaking her head then grimacing. Realizing she may have said something offending to you. “Not that I mean to offend you! It’s just well… the truth.”

“No offense.” You shake your head with a light grin. Waving your hand to dismiss her. You know you don’t do well with cadets yourself. “I know I don’t.”

She sighs in relief at that. Her body relaxing a little. Her eyes looking around her for a moment as she realizes you have made your way to the Commander's office. “Well… I hope whatever Burnside is thinking… the mission will come out at a big A+. Don’t want one of our best to fail because of a simple mistake of mispairing.”

You look at her for a moment. Considering her words as they almost feel… familiar to you. Something… like what her grandmother would say: Alisha Hawthorne.

Of course, you haven’t met her as you haven’t been born yet, but you have definitely seen and heard that old Commander around in historical buildings and even in Buzz logs. She was talked highly of, appreciated and loved from the generations of T’Kani Prime. She became the light and hope of this planet and for everyone aboard the Turnip. Gave them a new meaning rather than being in despair of being on this alien planet.

Perhaps… Izzy is to be just like her grandmother? To rise more in her ranks to be Commander just like her grandmother? You can see her potential…

“I do not fail my missions.” You say blandly but confidently, and yet you never have. Your missions were always a clean success. No matter how long they took to complete, you always find yourself coming back with a clean record of the mission and ready for a new one to be assigned to you.

“Which makes you the best.” Izzy smiles with a nod. Backing off a little bit, leaving your side. “Now, I wouldn’t want to intrude in your mission briefing. I’ll hear how it goes when you arrive back.”

You nod at her in return. Watching as she turns around to walk down the hallway properly instead of walking backwards. Her hands folded behind her back before she disappears down a different hallway.

Shaking your head when she does go around the bend of the hallway. You turn attention to the door in front of you. Looking at the metal of it and the name tag on it “Commander Burnside” before giving it two knocks.

“Come in.”

The door opens with the given permission, letting you inside of his rather… basic office. The room had the basic, dark wooden bookshelves behind him full of old books and the thick office desk in front of him. His form sitting in the middle and professionally on his leather office chair. His brown eyes watching you carefully as you walk in and stand behind two leather lounge chairs in front of his desk.

“Ranger.” He greets, nodding his head a bit to you in respect. His body moving a bit forward to lean his arms on his desk. The leather of his chair giving a light squeak. “Heard about your upcoming mission?”

You nod once at the Commander, straightening up a bit in his presence. Standing a bit taller. Knowing your required etiquette in front of a higher rank than you. “Yes, sir.”

The Commander nods. Thinking for a second before speaking once more. “Good, do you know what it is about?”

“No, sir.” You state, shaking your head. “I have been only informed of the two man mission. That I won’t be alone on this particular mission.”

Burnside hums at that, leaning back in his chair. Looking at you almost expectantly before informing you of your mission. “Yes, you have been set on a two man mission, with a cadet no less. So this mission is not up to your rank level but rather of the Cadet Wilsons. I want you to watch him while you’ll be up in the outer atmosphere to make sure the signals up there are in top condition. If not? It is your mission to repair every single last one of them until coming back down onto T’Kani Prime, is that understood?”

“Yes, sir. Your orders are loud and clear, sir.” You say automatically, nodding at your commander. His commanding tone leaving no choice to object. Yet you ask if you could question him anyways. “May I ask ‘why,’ sir?”

The Commander lifts his eyebrows at that and hums. Thinking through your words with a bit of suspicion before he sighs. “I know it is usual for you to go solo, but this cadet needs some more training and perhaps more discipline. I was thinking you would be the best option.”

“Is this cadet proving to be… troublesome?” You ask again, tilting your head a little bit for more emphasis. Folding your hands behind your back.

“He is a cocky one, I’ll give him that.” Commander Burnside responds, nodding. “I just need to make sure he can still follow orders without killing himself because his ego gotten too big.”

You nod at that. Knowing why you were sent with a cadet now. You’re still not pleased with it, but a part of you wants to know just how much this proclaimed cadet could take before he would snap, because usually it’s always the cocky ones that spill everything to the enemies first.

“I see that you are thinking about it.” The Commander hum, nodding again. Turning in his chair a bit. “You are dismissed then. This mission shall be simple enough.”

“Yes, sir.” You nod at him again in respect. Taking a step back before turning you back on him and taking your leave. The door opening up automatically when you go close to it.

Taking a few steps out. You hear the door of his office close as you make your way down the hallway. Your form nearbing bumping into another as you round the corner, again.

“Hey! Watch where—” A male voice comes out, ready to chew you out but stops mid sentence. Recognizing your rank and stature. Your eyes narrowing up at the man, observing him: Short, fuzzy and dirty blond hair with green eyes. Lean figure and snappy, cocky attitude and a name tag embedded with “Wilson.”

Ah, so this was the cadet you were going to work with? He definitely was living up to his descriptions already. His cockiness already showing.

“R-Ranger!” The boy stutters, saluting you quickly. His form straighting up.

“Cadet.” You simply greet, raising a brow up at his actions. Was he eager to please the higher up to rise up the ranks? Or was he just an obedient one? That definitely can’t be it.

“I hope my mission will go well with you!” He states, putting himself at ease without being told to do so. Possibly forgetting that he needed to be dismissed from saluting a higher power. “I hope I won’t disappoint you!”

You stay quiet for a second at that. Not knowing how to respond at that as again, you didn’t work with other rangers much or cadets no less. “I don’t think you will.”

“I won’t!” He protests even if he doesn't need to. Looking a little offended by your simple words but covers it up quickly. “I will take down the enemies with succession like the Zyclops!”

You raise your eyebrow up at that, mentally question this ever… eager cadet. Zyclops’s were rather formidable enemies of Star Command. It was kinda weird there were still more out there occasionally finding this planet as everyone thought they had shut down after Buzz blew up Zurgs spaceship.

“That big purple robot can get it too!” The cadet continues, confident and getting himself excited, mocking the purple robot you have been hallucinating about. It was kinda amusing. ““I’m the almighty Zurg and I shall destroy you and your disgusting planet!””

“I do not act like that.” You hear the robot in your mind speak suddenly, making this whole situation a bit more amusing than it was just seconds before. A twitch of a grin showing on your face before it disappears. “Insolent pest…”

“Well… for the sake of the mission.” You start, making the boy pause in his mockery. “Let’s make sure we don’t jinx ourselves. We want a smooth, calm mission. I know the thrill of combat maybe… fun, but that is not the way of the Ranger.”

Again, the cadet doesn't seem to like your words of logic as you can tell he was twisting his tongue inside of his mouth to shut himself up. Trying not to say anything stupid before he nods. “I understand.”

“Right, well…” You say but pause. Looking at the cadet over again. Making sure you weren’t missing anything beside his obvious dislike of being bossed. “You are dismissed. Don’t think too hard about the mission.”

“Understood.” He says again, a bit quieter this time, and you take that as your que to leave. You actually had some things to do before getting ready for the mission itself like find more about this Zurg, and perhaps… there was more than one of the purple robots. That, and you were curious about your… hallucinations of the purple robot.

Humming quietly to yourself as you leave the cadet alone in the hallway. You make your way to the archives this time. Going in and out of the buildings to get to it. Seeing a few people getting snatched by the planets vines with a yelp on your way there.

Entering the building with hiss from the automatic door, you notice that at first glance it was a local library. Though, for knowing better. You know there was to be some archives about or at least some personal stories that some people put out when Zurg attacked. So, you are sure you could get at least some information here that you are searching for.

Starting with walking around, you do see a little selection of personal stories from the attack, but you are wanting something more. Something that explains the ‘why,’ the ‘what’ and the ‘who’ of the enemy. You wanted to learn about your enemy, your hallucinations. Perhaps you should get some books on that… medical subject as well…

After a bit of wandering. Going up and down some steps, trying to look for the correct thing. You eventually come across a book (not an archive) about the big, purple robot. Your fingers gently brushing over the covers as you read the title. “Verity of Zurg”

“Getting interested in me now, darling?” The robotic voice comes back with an almost teasing-like laugh, but it also sounded like it had an undertone of… evil in it. “Oh, how precious of you.”

You can only hum at the robot inside of your head and flip the page of the book to try and start learning of this hunk of metal that haunts you when you are awake and sleeping. You’re really not sure why as you have never in your life seen this metal being before, but you know you can’t let these… hallucinations of him continue. You quite like being able to sleep peacefully and do your own job undisturbed.

“If you wanted to know about me you could have just asked.” The robot scoffs in your head and you have an inkling, a feeling that he shook his head, somehow. “I could have provided you with much more accurate and grueling descriptions these… pests have.”

You continue to ignore him within your mind. You sure as hell are not going to trust his words with that one. Especially, when learning and knowing that he is a villain after all. That is almost like a death wish; a trap.

“Oh, please.” Zurg scoffs again. You can tell he’s slightly amused by your thoughts. “I’m not much for exposing my own secrets, but to have someone destroy my image? Now that’s true villainy against me.”

Once more, you continue to ignore the robot. You do take his words in, but you just don’t respond to them. You know not better to. You know better not to connect with the past, future or present enemies.

The robot of your mind seems to give a gleeful cackle at that. Something that makes you tense up in your spot and send a shiver down your spine. “Oh, whether you like it or not. You will know of me darling. Just like everyone else. You will know of me, it is your luck just as it is mine.”

You briefly wonder what he meant by that as you suddenly look off to your side to a reflective window. Soft rain running outside of the glass panel, but for you… you can see him in it. Staring down at you with them glowing, crimson visors again. His massive, metal, purple form just standing there at full height in the window. How in the hell was he doing this to you? Did you have some connection with this robot that seemingly died?

“…You’re just going to continue to ignore my telepathic presence within your mind, are you not?”

‘Yep, yep you are.’ You think to yourself, turning back to the book in your hands. This metal being does not exist, and the metal being staring you down in the reflection of the window can’t help but give you another echoing cackle. Amused by your ignorance; your boldness to ignore him.

[that-left-turn]

Saw your post about advertising revenue going down. Subscriptions to AMC for Q1 went up while TOWL was airing. What are your hopes for TBOC drawing in new audiences for AMC? Do you think Caryl is a big enough draw and if not in its current state what needs to change?

Subscriptions going up while TOWL aired was good (for AMC). The question is if it's fans of that particular show dipping in and then dropping off? AMC can't appeal to the larger TWD fanbase for all the spinoffs. They've slimmed down, so they need to find ways to grow those individual audiences and they need to retain them for the longhaul.

The appeal of TBOC is in the lead characters and sadly, not the story. Zabel hasn't done his homework (which an incoming showrunner should do): he has either only watched the montage and final scene of the flagship show, or he's relying on what other EPs have told him about the characters and their arcs. That's why he thought Ezekiel was Daryl's friend, since he was there to see Daryl off in the series finale.

Contrary to what you'd believe from looking at the fandom and the loudest screaming individuals, Carol resonates with the general audience, so seeing her again will probably draw curious viewers, but will they stick around? It depends largely on how her character arc is handled and also, her relationship with Daryl. They have natural chemistry, which the show should capitalize on as it comes with a built-in audience.

Will it, though?

From what I know about TBOC, Carol and Daryl's individual arcs merge at the end of block 2/beginning of block 3, so 204-205-ish. That means half the season has them separated. That's not ideal for a show where the main appeal lies in the relationship between the leads (whether romantic or platonic). Their emotional drives appear uneven, from my limited view of the beats, which might also be a viewer deterrent.

I think AMC needs to go all-in on canon once the storylines intersect—especially as it looks like we're in for some heavy nunbaiting—to at least get some good word of mouth and maybe draw back parts of the audience who've given up on the show. There were people who stopped watching TWD in S7-8 who came back after the original Caryl spinoff was announced. Having a loyal core audience is vital, so the studio needs to insure that those viewers are invested and engaged.

The show also needs a story engine. The escort mission in S1 had little urgency, beyond Daryl looking for a radio, and the actual meat and potatoes of the external plot was nondescript. Laurent was said (prophesied, really, by a Buddhist monk) to be the new Messiah who will "save humanity." It's very fuzzy on the details and not in a way that implies mystery. It screams of hand waving. The show has to draw in horror fans with a season arc that services the genre.

Caryl fans would watch for a good emotional arc and the GA should be treated to a well-conceived external plot. If you can cater to both of those demographics, you can grow the audience (because people tell others when they like a show) but it hinges on tight storytelling. You have to have an actual detailed plan and not a vague idea of where you're going—pantsing might work for a novelist, but never for a screenwriter. There's an A story, a B story and you may have a couple of runners, for the season as well as individual episodes, so a TV show requires organization. (And I'm getting off-topic here, so I'll leave the logistics at that.)

I'm not confident in TBOC based on what I know of Zabel's writing in general, his management of S1, his statements to the media and what I know about TBOC. I think the show needs a redirect into a different subgenre and some fresh ideas that showcase McReedus playing off each other and Caryl being thrust into the unfamiliar (both to the characters and the audience)—we need to see something new while the characters stay in-character to tether them to the character development already done on the flagship show. (And now I've written 'character' so many times that the word has lost all meaning 🙈)

Zabel played loose and fast with Daryl's backstory in S1. Fans are invested in those details and if it's made it to screen, the showrunner can't ignore them to shoehorn the already well-established protagonist into a plot involving new characters. He shouldn't love his own original creations more than the actual main character. All of these things give me pause as to Zabel's suitability as a showrunner for a show that already has a preexisting ecosystem.

That said, it looks like the show is getting delayed to a fall premiere, promo seems to be on a hold and the season finale may still be in post, which could be signs of AMC fixing problems and/or changing direction.

Sorry the answer was neither short nor succinct, but I hope it gave some clarity regarding my thought process. Obviously, like everybody else, I have ideas of what I'd do to increase ratings, but I'm not the person in the hot seat 🙃 I'm waiting for the panel at Tribeca to see what I can decipher from the inevitable sell speak.

It may be a long summer for us.

[giac222]

I don't know if you've posted something/came to this conclusion as well but in TCOAAL I genuinely think Ashley just doesn't mind being her brothers anything as long as she is the only important person in his life. Like she wouldn't mind simply being his best friend as long as Andy only prioritizes her and only spends time with her. Ashley doesn't necessarily have romantic/sexual attraction towards Andy, but she wouldn't mind being his lover/fuckbuddy if that would make Andy only look at her. Meanwhile Andy is the biggest sisterfucker and sisterkisser of the year and he wants his little sister so bad it's insane. Like he wants her CARNALLY, he wants to MARRY HER. Andy is NOT innocent, he is actually the reason why they're headed to the incest route. If he wasn't into his sister he wouldn't have that weird steamy dream that involved Ashley, the dream would've probably been something boring. TL:DR Ashley only wants the company and attention of her brother Meanwhile Andy wants his sister (romantically/sexually)

Yesss! I’ve stated before that sex isn’t important to Ashley and if her and Andrew never slept together she wouldn’t care. I personally feel that her views on sex might change though; once she understands that Andrew loves her just as much as she loves him (Since she operates under the idea that Andrew actually dislikes her and that she’s unloveable due to her low self-esteem). So, instead of her viewing it as something to make him stay, she’ll start viewing it as something out of love they can experience together.

Another thing about Ashley is that platonic and romantic love is all the same to her, she doesn’t see a difference between the two. She loves Andrew to death for sure, he’s her everything, but like you said it isn’t necessarily romantic or sexual. Something else to remember: the reason Ashley has the attachment she does to Andrew is because she was treated poorly by everyone else around her, so Andrew was the only person she could depend on.

As for Andrew, you are so right. 😂. He’s down DESPICABLE for her. He just suppresses it like crazy. I’ve never seen someone in denial so bad. I’ve been saying that Andrew is the incestuous one, not Ashley. That’s why it’s so annoying seeing people outside of Tumblr go “omg she wants to fuck her brother sooo bad” 🤪… Literally no she doesn’t 💀.

In a different post, I talked about how there are dudes in the fandom that project the idea that Ashley is this seductive sex kitten who wants to bang Andrew onto what is canon in the game; bc that’s what they want her to act like. It’s so obvious. That’s why it’s agitating to see people hate on Ashley, but have 0 smoke for Andrew despite him arguably being more fucked up than she is. He’s the one who lies about having nightmares so he can sleep in the same bed as her. Then again, this can be boiled down to the fact that the fandom has a big misogyny problem.

As for the Burial Route, exactly. That’s why their reactions were so different, Andrew was beet red bc that’s not the first time he’s had dreams about that, and he got exposed 😂. Ashley looked a little nervous and I don’t think she was expecting to see that as a vision. After the vision when Andrew tells her she comes off as incestuous sometimes, Ashley looks surprised/nervous. So, even if she does come off as incestuous sometimes, I don’t think she does it on purpose.

Thank you for the ask!! ❤️