#one friend said he looked like his old maths teacher lol (another thing he said abt him is ''bro is about to start explaining quadratics'')

[arsen1cs4ng0]

little shit /pos (i have ms paint again ^__^) [vosim jink belongs 2 @hebezunet]

[mygnolia]

YOU MAKE ME GO CRAZY OVER YOU !!

୨୧ -› hey, that boy over there..isn't he the most popular student athlete on campus? how did you two meet, anyway?

pair -› jock/athlete! enhypen x fem! reader | wc -› 3.5k (700 per member) | no warnings! | library

˚୨୧⋆｡˚ ⋆ LEE HEESEUNG

im gonna sigh dreamily when i say he’s most DEF basketball captain. 

yes ik i wrote about this in wrong number i dont CARE i will say it with my whole chest 

DORK DORK DORK but cute dork with lethal face card. smirks after making yet another basket and winks at you

age old question how tf did yall meet!!! 

you pass by the gym and some guy on the way stops to talk to you 

like “hey i know you from somewhere”

“yes heeseung we were partners from a project two weeks ago how do you not remember..” 

he’s embarrassed asf especially because he remembers a lot of people’s names

after that he wants to be in your good graces and be friends

totally not because he remembered how you did a lot of the work for said project no complaints!!

and he doesn’t want you to rat him out to the teacher… or tell other people he’s not friendly

‘hey y/n, come to my game? i’ll do better if you’re there :)” 

you go only because you needed to complete an assignment while you were there at school anyways 

but sometimes you’d see him laughing with his friends, or how serious he is on court and woah, heeseung looks cool for once

you wait for him after because you figured he needed you for something 

“awh, you wanted for me?” “i could be doing much better things.” “awh, come on y/n let’s get some ice cream! my treat since we get to spend time together” 

he’s annoying but you let him tag around because he doesn’t bother you LOL

more under the cut!

drags you along when he practices alone so he can have some company

you like the company and the white noise too

you definitely doubt if he likes you because he is SUCH A FLIRT but no he DOES! he writes a confession on a basketball and ‘misses’ so you can catch it

you pass it back without seeing the message 

but heeseung keeps missing and it almost hits you on the head and you’re like ‘dude you SUCK hello??” he says ‘oh lol maybe it’s the ball” byee why was he smooth with it!!!!

you check the message and roll your eyes 

“if i make this you have to kiss me” you tell him and you’re about to shoot but he picks you up and brings you right next o the next to let you throw it in and then kisses u!!!!

not to be like oh im writing an smau on basketball captain heeseung but.. *tucks hair behind ear* 

most definitely tries to be mysterious and cool when you’re dating 

dribbles in front of you, trick shots, runs up to you when you’re alone, gives you one kiss between ever basket he makes 

teaches you how to play!!!!

ABSOLUTELY lights up when someones mentions you when you two date

“oh yeah my partner in math is ___” 

“omg ___?? the love of my life ___??” 

you lowk have to drag him away i fear 

˚୨୧⋆｡˚ ⋆ PARK JONGSEONG 

baseball captain *faints* 

enhypen x mariners and him speaking in english…so you want me DECEASED 

baseball captain jay and you who attends his games because jake aka ur friend on the team knows you have nothing better to do 

“i bet you won’t make it even to five games before buying cotton candy” jake says because you have a MASSIVE sweet tooth 

you tried really hard because $15 and a burger was on the line 

and you kept coming because…well there was a cute captain who always knew how to rally his teammates and get them excited 

also great sportsmanship and was super friendly to everyone! 

definitely got mad when the umpire makes a wrong call 

sharp reaction times. EVEN SHARPER JAW. 

of course you stared! of course you were not paying attention to whatever jake was saying about his test after their game..how could you when jay was doing his lopsided smile as his friend pats him on the shoulder from ten feet away??

one time you come early because they’re practicing on the field and you see jay and jake passing to each other

jay just so effortlessly throwing the ball…oh my god

he’s just so perfect and jake cheers from the sidelines because he knows his captain pays attention to every single person who has stepped foot on the baseball field iNCLUDING YOU

you come up to jake after the fourth game, showing him you still had your $5 and your tongue wasn’t stained with any blue or pink

jay comes over, arm thrown around jake’s shoulder as he waves and smiles to you 

dark hair with a twinge of sweat as he runs a hand through it, pulling it back to place on his cap 

JAY IN A BASEBALL CAP *faints again*

he walks you out to the parking lot and asks what the $5 in your pocket is for because he keeps seeing you pull it out 

you explain your whole bet to him and he nods

next game. before it starts. he gets you cotton candy and makes sure it gets to you somehow 

you smile and you’re all giddy when you eat it because there’s a p.j. on the cap and he’s just so cute 

jake doesn’t say anything he already knows it’s happening between you two. 

jay finally writes on a baseball and tells you to catch, and it says ‘let’s date’ and you grab a sharpie and scribble ‘kiss me first’ 

OH YEAH HE WALKS OVER AND KISSES YOU. 

soon every game instead of cotton candy  it’s his baseball cap when it’s sunny, his jacket when you’re cold, baseballs with notes on them, and roses for his girlfriend aka youuuuu 

jay is such a romantic and he is not afraid to show it 

he orders custom jerseys that say jay/n on the back with the day you got together!!!!! 

BEST BOYFRIEND EVERRRRRR

˚୨୧⋆｡˚ ⋆ SIM JAEYUN

rugby player jake but he has dark long hair let that settle in 

campus flirt campus playboy but in reality he doesn’t go on dates and nothing really happens past the smiles, he’s just super popular

you are also pretty well known! a little flirty but super sweet and your charm and how expressive and open you are with other people is what people like!

and he sees you cheering with your friend who he remembers is dating someone from the team

rugby has no gear so he just runs like no tomorrow 

smiling in the sun or determined stare as he talks to his team, you never know 

he yells either in frustration, victory, or defeat, literally will never be silent 

so after a game you follow your friend down to the railing and she has her little moments with her boyfriend 

and you and jake kind of awkwardly stand there for a moment 

he wipes his sweat off with a towel and smiles at you, cracking the ice 

“how long have you had to deal with that?” he points over to them 

you shrug and tell him “however long you’ve been dealing with it” he laughs 

oh wow his smile when he’s right in front of you is just so pretty 

and his little chuckle as he shakes his head and looks back up at you 

‘who do you watch on the field?’ he asks, with a little smirk because he likes you 

‘whoever catches my attention’ you tell him also smiling 

oh its a CHALLENGE. he will make sure to run on the side of the field you’re watching from, winking at you on the field, ugh just everything 

you come to a party at the end of the season to celebrate and he sees you 

“you came!!” super happy and makes sure you are next to him all the time 

“y/n you know the teammates, yeah?” you smile and congratulate them 

he leaves to get you a soda/water and jungwon leans in 

“jake LOVES to talk about you by the way” 

“yeah he always says how pretty you are in the library or in class, he likes when your friend comes because that means you come with her”

heeseung nods, “super into you, no joke” 

jake comes back trying to play it off “who’s into y/n?” 

you poke at his shoulder and smile, “you” and he’s all bashful and giggly 

loves to call himself ‘y/n’s girlfriend’ 

‘sorry, i can’t i have to buy flowers for y/n’ ‘sorry y/n needs me to help her study’ ‘sorry y/n needs a ride here’ STUCK TO YOUR HIP

ofc he doesn’t abandon his friends but he loves spending time with you :3

˚୨୧⋆｡˚ ⋆ PARK SUNGHOON

sunghoon’s reputation proceeds him—cold on the court and just as reserved off of it

ugh he’s so annoying, he always has his bag in the same spot as yours and he always is at the water filling station with hos annoying 32oz bottle before you

also hogs that automatic tennis ball throwing machine like how are YOU supposed to practice tennis too 

‘hey i need that’ he furrows his eyebrows and shrugs 

‘i was here first’ ‘what are you twelve????’ sunghoon tells you ‘get here earlier next time then 

oh yeah. for the next week you ran to the courts everytime to get it before him 

one day he sees you and races you to the gates and you beat him 

sulky after as if his career is over

definitely varsity and one of the best, but he never approaches girls after his games

one time you go to a men’s game because it’s one of the most anticipated of the season 

its neck to neck, third set with 40-adv, sunghoon’s serve

he chases after that ball and sends it over, it barely hits the net and tumbles over, AND HE WINSSSS BRAHHHHH 

even if you hate him you will admit that he made the game extremely interesting 

you see his friends congratulate him and you notice that he never gets his clothes dirty 

always wears white to practice—pristine asf 

secretly he loves watching you too

even if you hate him for getting on your nerves some days and almost never doing more than bare minimum, you cannot lie and say sunghoon isn’t a huge inspiration 

just as you are to him 

sunghoon thinks your tenacity and passion for tennis is what makes you so fun to watch 

so even if he has homework, he goes to a game of yours and comes down to the court after the game 

bumps your shoulder after, ‘good game, y/n’ and you’re like ?? ‘you’re here?’ and he’s sooo nonchalant when he says ‘of course, i can’t miss a fun game can i?’ 

there’s a fun mixed doubles tournament for a whole gift basket of things and you come up to him 

‘hey let’s pair up’ and he grins 

you two play each other for practice and you’ve tied the score so many times you’ve lost count

and sunghoon’s a little annoying but oh lord he’s so attrative??? so maybe he wasn’t THAT annoying…

mixed doubles tourney rolls around and oh yeah. you two win.

you know much he likes natto and you say ‘here you take the natto’ he shakes his head ‘no you eat it all the time’

you two bicker and you say ‘fine lets just share it!’ and to your surprise..he opens the package and just mixes it all in 

you two sit and share the natto, then he tells you he thinks you’re pretty cool on court 

you raise your eyebrow cuz where is this coming from!! and he rolls his eyes 

‘nevermind maybe you’re only bright on the court’ 

‘hey what’s that supposed to mean!!!’ you take the natto and eat all of it LMFAO and then he pouts because noo his natto!!!

you kiss his cheek. it’s ok everything is ok now he is a happy boy 

“you’re my match” you write on a tennis ball pin and he keeps it on his bag like his life DEPENDS on it

˚୨୧⋆｡˚ ⋆ KIM SUNOO

THE CUTEST VOLLEYBALL SETTER EVER 

i hate to be like oh you’ve had the fattest crush on him for like two months BUT ITS TRUE 

you’re on yearbook and you make an excuse to go see sunoo play!!

you two met when you were at a volleyball game and you told him to smile, but he’s one of those guys who says “wait delete that take another one!!” 

and ofc you agree, snapping a few cute photos of him

he posts to his social media, tagging you with a cute song saying ‘thanks photographer :3” 

and so you it begins, your small little crush on him..

he loves seeing you at his games, always makes sure to wave to you on the court 

hey so setter sunoo is insanely good at what he does 

so graceful when he places a NASTY setter dump on the other team, a glare shot at one of the other team’s members bad-mouthing him, but a glowing smile as he high-fives all his teammates! 

super supportive, and you loveee that about him!! he cares so much about everyone it makes your heart warm 

“here, let’s eat together,” you tell him, and you bring him some noodles you made because he said he was craving some 

he smiles at you and sits down, beginning to slurp slurp slurp and SCOREEE he loves it 

“thanks y/n, let me treat you some time :)” UGH DEAD DEAD 

KIM SUNOO KING OF FLOAT SERVES 

huge smile on his face when it lands where it needs to, he loves that feeling of satisfaction and soaks up all of your praise after his games are over 

he slips out of practice sometimes to see what you’re doing in yearbook, and he’ll take your camera to tell you to smile as he takes pics

someone in your class tells you too to look overfor a photo , so he loops an arm around your shoulders to pull you close and smile 

AND OH EM GEE UR LIKE TOTALLY GEEKING OUT OVER IT HELLO??????/ 

you ask her to print you a copy of it to save in your scrapbook, but sunoo cuts in and asks for another one 

“i like seeing you” DEAD IN A DITCH esp when he smiles at you and then runs off to practice before he gets in trouble

so competitive on the court and it makes him a little sulky when he loses 

“argh i did so bad today” he’d tell you, but in your eyes hello kim sunoo could do no wrong!! and you share your snacks while reassuring him 

he swears tho, “nooo, i had to look cool for you!” and you’re tired of hearing him say and do all of these sweet things and straight up 

“why?” “what do you mean, y/n?” “why do you want to look cool for me?” “well i liked you duh!” 

but sunoo never wanted to confess, he was too scared he wasn’t good yet at showing you all of his perfect bf traits 

WELL HE THOUGHT WRONG!! he’s been perfect from d1 so now he just sneaks in like 40 kisses before every game 

˚୨୧⋆｡˚ ⋆ YANG JUNGWON

see so jungwon, he’s been a little FLIRTY as of recently. 

“you like older guys? but im a younger guy with rhythm” WHAT THE FKSCNHDJFD

whatever. anyways jungwon focuses on badminton like it’s a lifeline 

hitting birdies in his sleep would be smth he would do if he could, he loves how aggressive he can be in the sport without moving too much, lots of strategy involved 

you come to one of his games because your friend is on the other team, and you want to cheer him on

but jungwon notices you’re literally from his school?? 

isn’t it weird you’re going to a game for someone on the other team…

so he sets off a plan 

he goes to you after the game before your friend can

“hey, how come you don’t support anyone on our team” so straight to the point help 

and you tilt your head in confusion because “well i don’t know anyone from the team and you’re all scary”

scary??? jungwon makes it his personal mission to debunk that cuz no one is SCARY 

maybe sunghoon but that’s because he’s varsity 1 and the best player within 150 miles but whatever

he makes it his mission to wave to you when he sees you and when he’s sat next to you in one of your classes he’s like yay perf 

“you’re the guy from that badminton game huh?” “is that a good or bad thing” 

you shrug “whatever you want it to be” 

and he asks you to go to his next game but if he wins, you have to support the team and if he loses 

and you stare at him like “wtf do i get out of it” 

jungwon did NOT think about that 

he promises to buy you a snack after 

and it’s free food so you can’t complain 

you two talk more and he finds out you used to play badminton before you hurt your ankle and wanted to focus on school 

so he takes you to practice and gives you one of his expensive rackets

lowk falling in love everytime you laugh and chase the birdie 

jungwon pretends to hate chasing after it but he’ll still hit it back even if it’s out of bounds because he doesn’t want to waste your time picking it up

you two sit down and you tell him how fun it was to be able to play, and how much you missed it from your childhood 

your school holds a small festival where other school athletes go against your team modified lighting rounds 

paired with vendors and fun carnival stands, but the main attractions are always the variety of sports to watch

jungwon is one of the representatives from your school but so is your friend from the other school, so it’s heated when they play

you tie a ribbon around his racket (curtesy of sunghoon for helping you out) and write a note saying “if you do good ill cheer for you” 

AND HE WINS. so you keep your end of the bargain and cheer for him after the game is over, giving him a high five and a hug

he walks with you and asks about what you two are BECAUSE THIS IS A DATE this is date behavior 

“of course i like you won who wouldn’t”

let’s just say he gives u little kisses all over when you two are alone sigh so cute

˚୨୧⋆｡˚ ⋆ NISHIMURA RIKI

he’s been on the soccer team ever since he was a freshman and even before, retaining his cute features and mischievous personality 

when you became assistant manager you were scared but your brother heeseung was on the team and your mom told you to look after him at school 

and riki takes after heeseung a LOT when they play and heeseung even goes as far as inviting riki over 

so riki’s super good at soccer by the time heeseung leaves, but he also has this small crush on you that heeseung’s told you about 

you just never said anything because you never had a reason to nor were you uncomfortable with it 

but junior year hits and riki comes back from winter break with pitch black hair all styled 

also…a lot taller than you. and no more baby fat 

and you paid attention to some of it because you saw him for practice, but the hair really did it 

during practice he loves to mess with you saying things like “can you fill up my water y/n pleaseeee” “no you have two feet” “ill win the next game against ____ if you get me water” “i’ll kick you off the team if you don’t win” 

he sighs and gets up, glaring down at you and you try not to let his playful stare affect you, but SOMETHING was different something was in the air

if riki doesn’t play good, it’s because his team manager aka you is NOT there 

you come back the next day to find out he was sulking and didn’t play super well because you weren’t encouraging him

“go run a lap, riki” and HE DOES JUST THAT “go practice on the field by yourself”

“how about you ask me to date you next” he grumbles 

and you HEAR him. loud and clear. 

but you’re like agh what if he doesn’t mean it what if he’s just joking 

at the next game he does super well and you congratulate the whole team 

yas team hybe eats 

you two are getting ready to go home when he finally brings it up

“you heard what i said on tuesday” and you know exactly what he means 

“yep.” “so why didn’t you say anything back” “i didn’t know if you were being serious”

he scoffs “y/n when have i ever not been serious about you”  

he opens your door even if he’s passenger princess 

makes fun of you for how much closer you need the wheel to be to drive

YAYYYY Y/NKI IS REAL

he loves to drape an arm around your shoulder walking around school 

acts as if he’s older when you two are literally the same age HELP 

reblogs/interactions are appreciated always!

have some shameless self promo for my spiderman!riki fic!

and my upcoming jake fic!

[annabethy]

37, percabeth, (maybe teacher au, but you to you lol)

“You could always go nude”/“Lie to me, then.” (Didn’t know which so have both?)

“I have nothing to wear.”

Percy looks up from his position on their bed, unfazed. He was used to her dramatic complaints about having no clothes but based on the fact that his closet was overflowing and he’s pretty sure he hasn’t seen her wear the same outfit twice at work yet so far, he knew it wasn’t true.

“Help me, please.”

“Close your eyes and grab whatever,” Percy says, glancing back down to his phone. “We have to leave soon, and you’re nowhere near ready, but I am both your boyfriend and coworker who also has to be there, and I will pick you up and drag you out of the apartment—” He cut off immediately, dodging the heel she threw at his head with a laugh. “You look good in anything, and that’s coming from both me and your deeply-involved students, so just pick something.”

Annabeth stomps her foot in front of the closet like a toddler. She fingers her lanyard holding her school ID before giving up and turning around. She makes her way to right in front of Percy, staring down at him for a few seconds before she’s climbing on top of him, forcing him to abandon the phone in his hand.

“What are you doing?” he asks, but he’s laughing as she headbutts him.

“I’m trying to curl up in a ball and die,” she says.

“Not on my lap,” he scolds. His hands smooth down her wild hair, knowing that it’s going to add another ten minutes to their voyage down to the school because she wasn’t going to leave until she looked perfect.

“Yes, on your lap,” Annabeth mumbles from where her face smashed into his chest. She jerks around for a second, trying to get comfortable, and then she’s on her back, Percy’s arm cradling under her and supporting her neck. “If I have to die, I want to do it with you.”

“No one’s going to die,” he says softly. His hand taps her hip, thinking for a moment, before he decides to humor her. “Talk me through the problem. What’s going on?”

“I have no clothes.” The way she says it, Percy would’ve thought someone got hit by a car.

Percy looks to their closet dubiously. “Then why am I looking at about twenty outfits?”

Annabeth pauses her moping to follow his eyes. She blinks as though she didn’t see any of those. “I don’t see anything.”

“You could always go nude,” he proposes.

Annabeth scoffs, bonking him on the head with a random throw pillow she picked up from behind him. “This is a school event, and all of our students will be there. You want them to see me naked?”

“That is a very valid point.” Percy hums. “Tie a bed sheet around yourself and call it a day.”

“You’re useless to me.”

Percy rolls his eyes and rocks her back and forth. He was rushing her to get out of the apartment because he knew she would take longer to get ready, but the reality was that they had some time. They had at least another hour before they absolutely had to be leaving.

Besides, she looked so comfortable in his arms, cradled sideways, body turned in towards him, that he didn’t have the heart to bother her. Especially not when her eyes started to slowly blink and flutter shut.

He lets her drift off to sleep, if only for five minutes. As he looks at her, he starts to notice something that’s been occurring to him a lot more recently.

Every time he looks at Annabeth, he sees more than just her. He sees a little girl with ribbons braided into her hair bouncing around between them. He sees a future with her that he wants so desperately to fulfil. He doesn’t think it’s going to happen — at least not anytime soon — but he knows he wants a life like that. They’re both still so young, and they’re so in love, and they deserve it.

Percy keeps rocking her gently, imagining what it would be like if maybe he was rocking a baby to sleep, or holding his family in his arms while they watched a Disney movie because their child was so excited to see a princess. It’s a life he’s always dreamed of, and now he knows it’s a life he has a chance of making come true.

“You gotta wake up, baby,” he whispers when he looks back at the clock. Somehow, half an hour had passed by. “We really have to leave soon.”

Annabeth stirs slowly. She wipes the sleep from her eyes, and as if on cue, her phone dings from its position in her back pocket. Percy’s hand digs it out for her, holding it for both of them to see, and it’s a message from someone he did not expect.

“Why does Piper have your phone number?”

Annabeth shrugs, taking the phone from him. She types out a response lazily, and Percy can’t hide his amusement at her blatant distain for Piper.

(Piper: where are you

Annabeth: none of your business, peasant

Piper: why can’t you love me?

Annabeth: you are peasant)

A second later, Annabeth’s forcing herself to get out of his arms. The absence of her body heart leaves Percy empty and cold, but it’s replaced by her lips pressing against his momentarily. He tries to grab her and keep her against him for longer, but she makes it a brief kiss, pulling away to head back in front of the closet.

“Does any of this scream I’m a math teacher but not one of those ugly ones?”

“You could wear a blow-up dinosaur costume and you would still scream hot math teacher,” Percy tells her. He goes to her side, picking up one of his favorite outfits of hers and holding it in front of her face. “Wear this.”

The smile that morphs onto Annabeth’s face makes him think that she was planning this the entire time. Her hand had brushed by that specific piece of fabric a million times over, but when it’s him that tells her to wear it, it’s suddenly exactly what she was looking for.

Annabeth Chase was his little troublemaker, never making things easy for him. He doesn’t mind.

And because he’s spent the last half hour thinking about their future kids, he doesn’t catch himself until it’s too late.

“Are you going to be like this with our kids too?”

Annabeth stops what she’s doing to look up at him, and now he can feel the blush start at his neck and travel its way up his face. She doesn’t say anything for a few painful beats, until her jaw is going slightly slack and she struggles for words.

“I— what?”

“Nothing,” he manages, already turning on his heel to walk out the room, out the front door, and to the middle of the ocean to become friends with an individual piece of krill, or something.

“No, tell me!”

Percy stops by the door, not ready to face her, but he knows she isn’t about to let him get away, so he lets himself look at her. Surprisingly, she’s looking at him with a smile.

“You said something about our kids?” she prompts.

“No.”

“Lie to me, then.” She bites her lip and smiles. “Come on. Please?” Now he can see the excitement on her face, and everything comes crashing back to him.

Clear as day, he can see the picture of Annabeth holding an infant on her hip, one hand sorting through their closet — no. It’s the closet of a nursery, filled with dresses and onesies. And Annabeth is dressed in a flowing white shirt and black dress pants to go to work, her blonde hair cascading down her back. He sees a baby that can’t be more than six-months-old with her tiny fingers tangled in Annabeth’s curls, and Annabeth is bouncing her as she finally pulls out a pink romper, but not before throwing him a teasing glance and telling him, there’s nothing for her to wear.

Percy’s heart stops when he imagines Annabeth holding the baby out to him with an endearing smile, asking nicely for him to change the diaper — he’d complain, but he’d still do it because he’d do anything she asked of him. And when their baby is in her outfit for the day, Percy’s kissing Annabeth goodbye by the front door so she could get to the school while he dropped the baby off at his mom’s before meeting her in her classroom.

It’s so real that a part of him thinks he saw a glimpse of his future.

A sudden boost of courage, Percy says, “When we have kids, they’re going to have so many clothes that it’ll look like the closet exploded, and you’re still going to say that there’s nothing to wear, right?”

Annabeth drops the clothes she was holding onto the floor just so she could take a step closer to him. He allows his arms to rest against her waist, locking behind her, and her arms wrap around his neck. “When we have kids?”

And Percy falters. “I mean— I thought you wanted kids?”

“I do,” she assures quickly. “But the way you said it… it was so real, like— kids.”

“Kids,” he repeats. “Do we want to have kids?”

“Eventually,” she tells him. “I’d like to be married first, though.”

Of course she would, and that’s why he loves her. She knows what she wants, and she’ll do anything to get it.

“Get married first,” he repeats again. “We’ve been together for a year.”

“And I really like you. I think a wedding would be a pretty good next step.”

“And then kids,” he adds.

“And then kids.” She looks around, and he thinks maybe she’s looking at their future too. “Let’s check back in two years and see where we’re at,” she says. “Then we can seriously consider this.”

“But you do want kids?” he asks.

“I want kids, if only to tell you that she needs more clothes.”

“You’re using me for my money, woman.”

“You love it.”

And he really does, because it means that he’ll get to have kids with her. The only concern really is that he knows she’s going to buy a million things for that baby, and they’re both teachers that don’t make that much money. Still, they’ll manage. They always do.

“I do love it,” he says, “and I love you.”

Annabeth kisses him once and says, “Here’s to closets and kids and not enough clothes.”

Now that’s something to celebrate.

[a-crimson-lion]

Ultimatum: The Art of Lying In A Made Bed

(Or Why My Experience With Chapter 285 Is Contrary To Everyone Else's)

[Manga Spoilers Ahead. Also Opinions. Feel Free To Ignore.]

After Chapter 284, many fans were wondering how the story of BNHA would follow up on Katsuki's development. Now that Chapter 285 is officially out, fans are clamoring about Katsuki's latest acts of heroism, about how his arc is finally kicking it into high gear.

I'd be inclined to agree, but… you know how these things go.

[Heads up fans/stans, if you like Katsuki you might wanna bail. The word vomit that follows is pretty much incoherent and reflects my disaster of a thought process.]

I was looking forward to Chapter 285. I had my reservations on the execution of Chapter 284, but if the next chapter could follow it up and then some, I'd be pleasantly surprised. But then the leaks came out. And then the fan translation. And as of today, the official VIZ translation.

While everyone else is cheering for explosion boy, I'm just… done.

285 didn't get me to see how far Bakugo's journey has come. 285 didn't get me to finally root for him. And maybe I am making this decision prematurely, maybe I am missing something, but…

...the way things are going in the story I just- I just CAN'T root for him.

And I'm not saying the rest of you can't, if you're still reading. Katsuki is definitely a different person compared to Chapter 1, a better person, and he's definitely been heading on the up and up! If you can and want to support him, then by all means, go for it, don't let me stop you! It's just…

For me, chapter 284 was a wavering torch: a flicker of hope that sometimes dwindled, but was still there. Chapter 285 was the moment where I wanted to jump on the Katsuki Development Train, to finally gain some semblance of respect for him. But when I jumped, I landed on the tracks, and had to crawl back onto the platform.

I missed my chance to jump on that train. Whether it's because of previous circumstances or recent circumstances, I'll never know…

You probably wanna ask me at this point, "But Crimson, why DIDN'T Chapter 285 make you see the awe inspiring pinnacle of character development that is Katsuki Bakugo???"

To put it simply: it's a culmination thing.

For starters, there's a sort of… whiplash with Katsuki's development in the last few chapters. People like me will complain that Katsuki's development is too slow, in the case of the last 2-3 chapters, it feels like a switch was flipped, and now it's become too fast. Perhaps it's a me thing, but let me try to explain…

Shoto starts out as a standard background character. By the time he gets his spotlight in the Sports Festival, he comes off as reserved and antagonistic. After the whole "it's your power" moment, Shoto is finally able to accept the side he always hated. Then Katsuki fights Shoto, and we're shown he still needs time to grow; his left side comes with a lot of baggage he can't just brush off in the span of a single sparring match.

Fastforward to Hosu. Shoto's starting to take other people into better account. He's starting to learn to better control his fire. He's reconnected with his mother. His goal is no longer one-upping his old man; he has goals, people, that he wants to protect. He's coming into his own and wants others to do the same, like Tenya.

He joins the Katsuki Rescue Squad because, like Izuku, he had an opportunity to save Katsuki, didn't, and now he wants to make up for it. When we get to the Provisional License Exam, we're yet again slammed with the fact that his growth is still not done via Inasa, that there's still a bit of Endeavor he has to shake off, even if it was in the past. And he does progress towards that with the Remedial Course Arc. And while I have my opinions on the Endeavor Agency Arc, I'll admit that it was another development opportunity for Shoto and the Todoroki family. Shoto's growth comes with setbacks, but overall it's consistent.

Let's shift gears to Tenya, who's characterization I find fascinating. He starts out opposed to Izuku when they first meet at the Entrance Exam. He sees how Izuku is (for lack of a better phrase) "better qualified" at heroics thus far, reassesses his position, and apologizes whilst making amends. When Tenya resorts to LITERAL MURDER against Stain, the narrative does not let him go off without reprocussions. His arms are damaged, his supervisor's teaching license is revoked, and while he managed to avoid legal charges via police cover up, it still came close. Tenya listened to Stain's words, and opted to improve himself by that notion. He tries to set a better example, be a better class rep. It isn't a one and done.

Him lashing out during the Hideout Raid Arc is an offshoot of that. He doesn't deck Izuku just to be a dick; he's trying to knock some sense into him. They're so focused on Katsuki that they're forgetting about everyone else. Their friends, their teachers, their parents. If they f*** up like Tenya almost did at Hosu, they'll have hell to pay, and he doesn't want that. Of course, once they explain that combat/murder is not their M.O., Tenya tags along, if only to ensure the operation goes smoothly without this hitch. And again, Tenya keeps up. He looks after his classmates, looks after Izuku during the Shie Hassaikai arc. His growth is also consistent.

There are probably more characters I could elaborate on (Ochako, Momo, Eijiro, etc.), but I'll stop there. So, what's the deal with Katsuki's arc?

Well, it's… frustratingly back and forth.

It's one thing to have setbacks like Tenya and Shoto. It's something else entirely to have multiple setbacks and to keep trucking on with only abstract signs of development, but otherwise feeling like a very similar character compared to several chapters ago.

This is (in my opinion) Katsuki's problem. If we're going by what the manga stated, his arc technically started in Chapter 11: "Bakugo's Starting Line." But this is a rocky start. Izuku tells him about OFA right from the getgo out of guilt, but this neglects the fact that he's technically lying to everyone about it (including his new friends Ochako and Tenya), that OFA is a world-shattering secret, and that Katsuki is likely the worst person to tell this to considering that Izuku just handed Katsuki's ass to him and Katsuki was willing to use lethal force in their Trial. That aside, instead of say, sucking up his pride and opting to try and learn from everyone else, Katsuki doesn't really change strategies or approaches. He essentially does what he was planning to do since the start of UA; he's only crying because, SURPRISE, people are better than him. You'd think he'd expect that considering he called his middle school crappy…

After the USJ, once everyone had their "Lol Bakugo sux" moment on the bus ride, we get to the Sports Festival and everyone is clamoring to join Katsuki's team despite his apparent unapproachability. This feels less like something happened in the two weeks leading up to the Sports Festival, and more like history repeating itself from middle school. Moving on to the tournament, we don't even get to see how capable Katsuki is at serious combat. Two of his matches resort to Deus Ex Machina pulls, and the other two are in his corner by principle instead of difficult.

First off, Katsuki vs Ochako. I don't know why people praise this fight. For starters, it makes Katsuki HEAVILY OoC. Ochako is the only person he asks if she wants to back out before the match even starts. The ONLY person, which kinda undermines the whole "he didn't underestimate her" thing. Then he takes a reactionary stance the entire battle. Like, I thought we were still dealing with the "fist first" Katsuki. He does this to Eijiro, Fumikage, even Shoto, but Ochako? Stay still and then attack. Even if he did get his gravity removed, couldn't he just… propelly himself and let her have it. If he was proactive, he could have ended the fight quicker. Instead, he just plays sitting duck and headless chicken. If you're gonna have Katsuki win the fight, don't bulls*** it.

Which brings me to the final bit of that fight: the meteor shower. Having Katsuki blow that away after supposedly expending most of his energy earlier in the match just does NOT sit right. Ochako gets the upper hand, and then you just… negate that? You expect me to believe that Katsuki could generate an explosion at that magnitude, if nothing else? And what exactly does that do for him in the end? No one else tires him out for the remainder of the festival, which is pretty sketch.

(And yeah, I know I know "What part of her was frail?" but that's more of a retrospective thing than in the moment, coupled with the facf that it's never elaborated on again in any capacity, with Ochako or with someone else. It's a throwaway moment; a waste. Moving on…)

You really can't say much about the matchups with Eijiro and Fumikage. With Eijiro, it's an endurance match, and Katsuki apparently has infinite stamina and is on the attack. And he just… rushes him, which I'm pretty sure anyone else would do. Then with Fumikage, Dark Shadow is weak to light. Katsuki's explosions emit light on contact. Do the math.

And I am especially mad at Katsuki vs Shoto because one, he stays in place yet again at the start of the match, and two, he can apparently ignore his Quirk' weakness to low temperatures. In a gym uniform. Against a glacier the size of a building. Even with his power output, you don't see his explosions dampening in magnitude. It's obviously in his favor, which defeats any tension the fight could have had. It sucks, and in the long run, as a wise man once said, "Todoroki should have folded [his] ass."

Then we get to the Final Exams (ABOUT DAMN TIME) and… Katsuki hits Izuku for trying to cooperate, nearly gets knocked out once, and gets knocked out the second time around. He does not want to work with Izuku despite it being All Might, is petty enough to consider losing, and actively grumbles against working with Izuku. And all of his supposed self-preservation goes flying out the window when he's willing to try and beat All Might, leaving Izuku having to come and carry this boy out of the gate, which should not have let him pass.

Then there's the Training Camp attack. The second Izuku is mentioned, Katsuki decides to go AWOL, and while being kidnapped sucks, I am less sympathetic when you're boneheaded enough to help them capture you because you wanted to fight villains instead of getting to safety like the professionals recommended, all because of your one-sided hatefest with one of your classmates. Congrats, you played yourself.

Then we get to the Provisonal License Exam, which feels like a step in the right direction… until you realize this will boil over into Deku vs Kacchan 2, which will get both of them in trouble, which will give Katsuki insight into OFA while Izuku gets shunned by his classmates, and which will prevent Katsuki from the one ass beating that could have potentially taught him something. It's essentially the narrative covering his ass, and then he has the gall to be happy about other people potentially getting set back just because he was set back. Geez dude.

The Cultural Festival essentially undoes what the Remedial Course Arc accomplishes, having Katsuki look down on the rest of UA when he said NOT to look down on people earlier. And then his speech is still heavily antagonistic to the rest of the school, and to the idea of basic human decency and kindness in general. And if I'm being honest, that whole "he can play drums" feels like a big ass pull to keep him in the spotlight. At least the story brought back his ability to cook down the line.

The Joint Training Arc is just shoe horning in regards to Katsuki. It acts like his gearing up towards saving, but the circumstances are heavily, heavily in his favor, and not in a good way. I've already brought up how Katsuki won't get "saving" until the Endeavor Arc, and how here he's just doing it to show off, so I won't go into it here. Then apparently he gets to outwit a recommendation student 'cause why not? It makes him look more impressive than he actually is, even though he outright states he hasn't changed much if at all. Not to mention the narrative makes it sound like he was some sort of underdog, even though he only got kidnapped and didn't get his license. And I know those are big things, but not enough to warrant his victory feeling that triumphant. I'd probably buy it if he didn't win the Sports Festival or pass the Final Exam. Keep him in that slump for longer than you actually do, or it lessens the impact. And let's not forget, he might have been willing to help Izuku with Blackwhip via fisticuffs, but the second he realized he wasn't getting anything out of it, he noped out. And it's been what, almost 200 chapters since his "starting line?"

I don't have much to say during the Endeavor Arc (that was its own can of worms),  but as for the War Arc thus far… here's what I mean by "whiplash." The arc begins in Chapter 253. By Chapter 257, Katsuki will demonstrate how much he just does not give a f*** about Izuku's mastery over OFA so long as it looks like he'll come out on top. By Chapter 274, when Izuku's gotta split, it'll look like Katsuki has been thinking about some stuff, but by 275 he's gonna throw that out the window so he can attempt to one up Tomura and Izuku, and then he'll nearly get killed for it. And we won't know what exactly Katsuki is thinking until a flashback in Chapter 284 (which chronologically takes place after 257), where he has a conversation with All Might about his past with Izuku. Or at least the bullet points. If you're me, the start of the conversation feels less about Izuku and more so about his situation: his situation with OFA. And as much as I want to believe there was at least one good kernel in Katsuki that he was too stubborn to let out with Izuku, I feel like Katsuki only brings up him and his capabilities now because he got a Quirk. That's what put him on Katsuki's radar. That's what forced Katsuki to take notice of Izuku, what caused him to be unable to ignore his own weakness. Because of a Quirk. That's… borderline shallow, if not remarkably so.

And even when Katsuki is attempting to save Izuku in 285, his first thoughts are still on OFA. And even if we go by the line of thought that Katsuki is thinking "Even if OFA sucks, it's still Izuku's Quirk." And that's nice and all, but the flashback makes it seem like the Quirk is still All Might's Quirk as well. That all of Izuku's worth is hinged on the fact that he got a Quirk now and therefore can't be written off. Maybe he doesn't owe this to his accomplishments, but the narrative is terrible in its implications that Izuku wouldn't have gotten as much attention without it. At the end of the day, Katsuki is still associating Izuku's worth with his Quirk. And as much as I want to vaguely, vainly hope that this will change later on, I'm already at my limit

...and now that I've said my piece on almost the entire narrative thus far, let's shift gears to a few more tidbits in 285.

Again, the flashback. I think it's significant that they're shifting the focus briefly on middle school again. But you wanna know what sent me the wrong way? They didn't include the god forsaken suicide instigation. They can show Katsuki gloating. They can show Izuku up against a wall. They can even show a notebook and Izuku's face during the Sludge Villain rematch. But they can't show Izuku reacting with sorrow mixed with almost fury. That can't show Katsuki threatening him with a mere "What?" and the sparks on his palms. They can't show Izuku standing and crying, small and defeated.

"BUT HORI SAID HE WENT TO FAR WITH THAT SCENE!1!" Blah blah blah, doesn't change the fact that it still happened. Doesn't change the fact that it should be addressed, at any capacity. Doesn't change the fact that the story had the balls to recall middle school but couldn't bring itself to remember the one thing that could get its audience raising eyebrows.

But that's alright, it gave you the notebook; clearly it's done enough.

And maybe in another timeline, I could have let my jaw drop when Katsuki was hit and the chapter title was revealed. "Katsuki Bakugo: Rising" It would have been pretty damn powerful too.

...but with all the previous crap the narrative has pulled, it feels like more shoehorning. It feels like more Erasehead stepping in and shaming the audience. It feels like more All Might letting Katsuki in because he's not completely familiar with the finer details. It feels like more people. In narrative parroting that Katsuki changed when he does the bare minimum, as a hero or as a person. I can't treat this development legitimately, because so many other "legitimate" developments pulled a "psyche!" and headed out.

So, I'm done. I'm done with Katsuki, done with hoping his development will be done in a somewhat satisfying manner. Done with people telling me "it's actually good though!" like I'm blind and deaf or something, when I have enough brain cells to formulate my own opinions, and we both have enough brain cells to leave each other alone if we don't agree. Maybe when the series ends and we can all look at this in hindsight, and Katsuki has either found a way to redeem himself, or remain deplorable, I might talk about it then. But for now. I'm drawing the line. I might talk about what we've gotten up to this point, but everything past 285 I'm taking with a grain of salt. 'Cause I'm sick of hoping for something that obviously won't come through, and it's better for me and everyone involved if I just pack up and move on. BNHA isn't just Katsuki's story after all.

And if you made it to the end of all this… I hope you'll either respect my opinion, or respect my thought process. That's all I can ask.

-Crimson Lion (27 September 2020)

[ultraintrovertedgryffindor]

Rule Breakers - Dewdrop Ghoul (Ghost)

Another story with child!Dewdrop. I love him so much lol. Please, someone make fanart of the Ghouls as kids! I would literally die of adorableness 

Slight trigger warning: some bullying

~~~~~~~~~~

You were born when your mother was a Sister of Sin, so you were friends with the little Ghouls since you lived in the same building.

There has always been a rule in the Abbey that Ghouls were never allowed to leave the premises, other than adult Ghouls on Halloween. The adult Ghouls that were part of the band were the only ones that could travel.

You didn’t understand why. To you, they were the same as other people, they just looked a little different. Whenever you wanted to play with the Ghouls outside the Abbey, the members always told you that you couldn’t and that they’d explain why one day.

Your mother told you that people would become afraid if they knew that Ghouls existed, that they wouldn’t understand it.

You always thought the Ghouls were adorable, so how could anyone think they were scary?

You wanted to prove the Abbey wrong that people would be afraid of Ghouls.

But you made a plan, a pretty good plan in your in your opinion.

You wanted to take one of the Ghouls to school with you on Halloween. You thought, if anyone suspected the Ghoul, you’d just tell them it was a very well made costume.

What could go wrong?

It took some trial and error, but you finally convinced a Ghoul to agree to your plan.

All the other Ghouls were afraid to break the Abbey’s rules, except one.

Dewdrop.

Dewdrop had always wanted to see the outside world, other than the garden in the middle of the lot. He thought at least Swiss would want to join, him having a somewhat rebellious nature, but he was too scared.

Halloween day, the plan finally in motion.

All the students were encouraged to wear a costume to school. You wanted to dress up just like you mom, and so she made you a habit that looked just like hers.

You were ecstatic, about the costume and your plan.

You quickly grabbed Dewdrop from the area of the building where the rest of the Ghouls lived, and surprising snuck him out successfully.

Even with his fiery attitude, you could see your friend was nervous by how much he fiddled with his hands.

“It’ll be fun.” You encouraged.

You both waited at the bus stop.

It didn’t take long for the large vehicle to arrive, letting out a noisy hiss when it stopped, making Dewdrop flinch at the sound.

The doors opened and the driver immediately let out a gasp, making you start to panic at the thought of getting caught. “What amazing costumes you two have!” The old lady awed, making you and Dewdrop sigh in relief.

You and Dewdrop let out a chuckle, you giving the driver a meek thanks and walking to your typical seat on the bus.

The whole bus ride consisted of Dewdrop looking around nervously and you repeatedly telling him to stop flicking his tail around. The lie you came up with just in case someone asked was: it was a remote controlled tail. But even you didn’t buy that.

The bus stop finally arrived at your elementary school. It was relatively large, so you weren’t too worried about your teachers not recognizing Dewdrop. They could barely remember you anyway.

Students were entering the building in hordes, and suddenly Dewdrop grabbed your sleeve.

“Y/N...I’m nervous...” He admitted.

“We’ll be fine. It’ll be fun! I promise!” You smiled, childlike innocence to your voice.

Dewdrop nodded and took a deep breath, following you into the building.

Walking down the halls, you tried to ignore all the whispers from fellow students bad mouthing you. You weren’t very popular in school, most kids picked on you. But you kept your head high, not letting it get to you. You wanted to follow in your mother’s morals and outlooks on life. She was the stronger person you knew, she never let anyone bring her down.

Dewdrop however, with his super hearing, felt his blood boil when he realized all the harsh comments were about you. He started to feel the tips of his fingers burn. He dug his claws into his palms, not wanting to give himself away that he wasn’t human. But he hated what these kids were saying about you.

So far, things were going well. No teachers noticed that Dewdrop wasn’t a student...or that he wasn’t human.

One teacher even said that if they had a contest, Dewdrop’s “costume” would win for sure.

Dewdrop did have to laugh a little when a teacher explained what Halloween was about, or what their version was about. Guess you couldn’t teach little kids that Halloween is about worshiping Satan.

Overall, Dewdrop was having a fun experience. Learning about things he was never taught in the Abbey before. He surprisingly even liked math.

Then came recess, the bane of your existence.

It was the time when the bullying was the worst, you just hoped Dewdrop wouldn’t do anything.

“Hey, devil child!” One of your bullies called out. “Dressing like your whore mom, huh?”

You quickly felt the burning sensation pricking your eyes. You were fine getting bullied, but not your mom. “Don’t...” You whimpered at Dewdrop, already feeling the heat radiate from his body.

Dewdrop grit his teeth, willing himself to not shatter this bully’s nose.

“Aww, look! She’s gonna cry!” The bully laughed and pointed.

The bully walked closer to you and you looked down. “You gonna cry, little devil?” He teased.

“Back off.” Dewdrop growled lowly.

The bully turned to the Ghoul. “Ha, is this boyfriend? Can’t tell if it’s just the mask or what, but he sure is ugly!”

“Just stop!” You shouted.

The bully suddenly pushed you to ground, laughing when you let out a yelp.

Dewdrop felt his whole body heat up. He was furious, the tips of his fingers creating little sparks and his eyes glowing bright yellow.

“Dude, you’re on fire!” The bully noticed. 

“Oh really? Why don’t you take closer look?” Dewdrop grinned evilly.

You looked up in shock when you heard a high pitched screech. Dewdrop’s hand was glowing a dull orange and holding onto the bully’s arm, the slight smell of burning clothes and flesh filling the air.

You quickly got up and pulled Dewdrop’s hand away, getting slightly singed in the process. “Dewy, stop!” You cried.

Dewdrop immediately stopped, finally remembering where he was when the haze of his rage cleared. “Sorry...” He stuttered weakly to you and the now sobbing boy.

The bully quickly bailed, screaming in pain on the way into the building.

A teacher suddenly stormed up to you and Dewdrop. You panicked, but you realized she was a member of the church. But you still knew you were in deep.

“You’re lucky that I found you when I did.” The teacher/church member said and sighed from beside you, you being in the passenger’s seat of her car and Dewdrop in the backseat.

“What’s gonna happen, Ms.?” You asked timidly.

“The boy is being taken to the hospital. Dew only bring a kit, the severity of his burns won’t be life threatening. 2nd degree at the most. The burn would’ve been down at the bone if he was an adult.”

“He deserved it!” Dewdrop voiced. “He was hurting Y/N!”

“Bullying or not, the Clergy is going to be taking a huge hit from this! The parents will be pressing charges no doubt, we’ll have to settle them out of court. You two should be ashamed of yourselves!”

“I’m sorry...I didn’t think this would happen...” You whimpered.

The teacher sighed disappointingly. “I know, dear. How could you? You’re just a child.”

When you got back to the Abbey, you got a very stern lecture from the higher ups. You and Dewdrop got punishments fit for the “crime.”

It wasn’t even having privileges revoked, having to be separated from the Ghouls for a few months, that upset you. It was the disappointment in your mother’s eyes when you had to face her.

So, the parents did press charges and the church did settle them out of court and made them keep quiet about the whole thing. It took a big chunk out of the church bank account in the process, of course.

But it was worth keeping the church’s secrets under lock and key.

You felt extremely guilty for doing something so stupid, but being allowed to see your friend before the separation made you feel a little better.

Dewdrop smiled sadly at your frowning face.

“For what it’s worth, I had a lot of fun.”

~~~~~~~~~~

Like, I’m serious...please someone make art of baby ghouls...I neeeeed iiiiiit

But fun fact about me, I was actually called Devil child for the music I listened to at an old school of mine. It was great fun👌🏼

[dawniebb]

Face reveal bc yes

So, guys...especially from the Renegades fandom bc i’m the most active there: you saw the title lmao. This will...barely get notes (i wonder if it’ll get notes at all) buuUUUT YEAH LET’S GOOOO (If you’re gonna reblog pls be respectful bc i have issues and btw reblog ONLY if we are mutuals)

THIS IS ME! <3 HELLOOOO!!!

Now, if you want to stop here, do it. If you don’t...well

I’m going to tell you a story about myself and why I decided to post this.

First of all, I’m not celebrating anything. I’m just celebrating me, I guess (?) and in fact I’ve been wanting to do this since my parents got me a She-Ra cake for my 20th birthday back in May, because I loved that thing and felt the physical need to shove that thing into everyone’s faces But I didn’t because I didn’t feel ready enough...then that thought left my mind, and it came back like two weeks ago.

I’ve had mental issues since I was in like...elementary school. I’m sure I had felt depressed before I turned 12; however, the first memory I hold of feeling so, it’s when I was already 12. Because it was then when I realized that I wasn’t just a dumb kid who didn’t know how to make friends xd To this day, I genuinely feel like I was suffering from isolation bullying; you know xd my classmates purposely excluded me from activities, they would find any excuse for not letting me join their work teams and stuff like that; during my last year at elementary school, I only had like one friend, and that one friend and I shared a sort of abusive/toxic relationship, as in: manipulation, “we’re best friends. you should only talk to ME”, and then this friend turned her back at me too, because she decided to join the rest of the group and ignore me.

lol.

And I remember wondering what was I doing wrong. Like, why didn’t people like me; why didn’t they want to hang out with me; why did everyone seem to have friends except me. And then I got trapped into a very...dark place, and I remember being overthinking one day, because I tend to overthink a lot...and I remembered this specific kid who was in the same class as me.

I was in the line for the teacher to check my homework, and this kid, a boy, was behind me.

You see. I’ve always been chubby xd I don’t think I’ve ever been skinny since I was 2 years old or so, because by the time I was in kindergarten my classmates’ moms were already calling me a ‘little meatball’ thinking it was a fucking adorable nickname because Mexican moms can be pretty shitty sometimes don’t let the media stereotypes fool you not all of them are all cheerful and upbeat and when I was in elementary school, for some reason, besides being chubby, I had a really bad posture. And this boy who was behind me started imitating my way of walking and his friends were laughing, so I turned around and asked him wtf his problem was xd and he turned around to his friends and asked “Do you see how hunchback she is?” like I wasn’t even there xd and I genuinely tried to slap him but I couldn’t, and he said “Yo, stop moving because you’re going to cause an earthquake”

And my mom has always felt personally attacked for the fact I’m...u know, fat. She has always been very insistent on the fact I need to lose weight and stuff like that. And her, mixed with my experiences at school, made me feel like I wasn’t enough.

But my mind started saying things like “And u know why you aren’t enough? Because you’re fat”

Because, like, the day of the hunchback insult, when I told the teacher, who was a very shitty teacher btw but i’m not talking about her again today (i’ve already talked about her in MANY of my university papers, because I’m studying to be an English teacher), she turned around at him and said “Don’t listen to HER” and to this day I still don’t know why xd

But it made me feel like I wasn’t enough. Because I was fat.

Lol x2.

To this day, I still don’t know if I have an ED. Like, I genuinely don’t know. But I can safely say that, if I have one, it’s more likely BED... because, through the years, I managed to lose weight when I turned like 15 and I had my quinceañera party, but then first year of high school came and I had a relapse into depression...like, this might come off as a very unpopular opinion, but junior high school was dope for me x’d I remember it as one of the best years in my life, right after my second and third year in high school (high school in Mexico lasts only three years) and so...when I started my first year in high school and got fucking depressed again, I gained ALL that weight back, and even doubled it. During my second year of high school, I met my friends. The friends I still keep with me to this day. And they accepted me like the fucking train wreck I was, failing math like three times in a row and crying about it every single one of those times  because I’m pretty sure I have dyscalculia but my parents won’t listen to me they think i’m just lazy when it comes to math even though they know i cant even read a fucking clock . And them, along with my another very close friend who I met via fanfction when I was 12, helped me go through it. Like, I did have some issues with my body during high school, but not as much as you would expect. They were getting pretty bad in my first and second semester, but during the other four my friends managed to stop me from losing my mind, even when it all went to shit in my third year again for different reasons.

Then I graduated from high school, and I made friends there too. Although my best friends are still my friend from fanfiction, my friends from high school and just one of my university friends. And you know...I was left...pretty scarred from the shit that happened during third year of high school, and even if I didn’t feel like I was *that* depressed, I did gain a lot of weight.

Like, the highest I’ve ever been. Then my dad got sick during October from last year, then my two doggies were murdered god i fucking hate my neighbors the same day my dad was released from the hospital and my mom went kinda nuts during December and I wanted to just...yeah.

So I did a lot of emotional eating. Like, y’all don’t understand.

It was like...I would go to uni and eat a brownie. Then chocolates on my way home. THEN a “a snack” like...fucking rice krispies. Then a huge ass meal, with soda bc why not. Then I would have either cookies or hot cheetos as a treat after my huge ass meal,

I’m a short person xd carrying that much weight was making my ribs and back hurt, as well as my legs and feet; my breathing was freaking awful, and there were some days were I got SO paranoid I just said things like “i’m gonna die today” or “out here trying to get diabetes like the rest of your family, aren’t you??” :’) but i didn’t tell anybody. My parents are not really an option in this case, BUT I didn’t tell my friends, because then I would have to explain that I ate a lot and that was something I was EXTREMELY ashamed of.

When February came, I was scared of going out, because I knew I would have to choose what clothes to wear and nothing fit me anymore and, the things that did, looked super stretched on me and, u know, I was sore. My health was getting bad. But I didn’t like to feel that way.

AND I MUST CLARIFY HERE. I’M WORKING ON THAT. I’M ACTUALLY A BODY POSITIVY DEFENDER, I JUST DIDN’T LIKE HOW *I* LOOKED AND, BESIDES, I WAS GETTING SICK. I GENUINELY THOUGHT I WAS GOING TO DIE AT SOME POINT. I’M NOT SAYING BEING FAT OR CHUBBY IS DISGUSTING. NO. I BELIEVE ALL HUMAN BEINGS ARE EXTREMELY BEAUTIFUL. AND IF I’M WRITING THIS IS BECAUSE I WANT YOU TO KNOW RECOVERY IS DISGUSTING AND DIFFICULT SOMETIMES AND THAT IF YOU’RE GOING THROUGH SOMETHING LIKE THAT: I’M SORRY. NOBODY SHOULD EVER FEEL LIKE THAT. I SUPPORT YOU. AND I HOPE THINGS GET BETTER. AND NO MATTER WHAT OTHERS SAY, YOU’RE BEAUTIFUL. YOU ARE TO CHANGE ONLY IF YOU WANT TO CHANGE. BECAUSE IT’S YOUR BODY. KEEP HOLDING ON.

But going back to the story...

My friends used to tell me I looked pretty all the time, which I appreciate a lot to this day. But my parents were like

Me: I’m fat and I look deformed.

Them: I agree.

Because yeah.

Just before the pandemic madness happened, I went on a school trip with my uni friends and one of them triggered my isolation trauma in the worst way possible...and that, somehow, ruined ALL the photos I took throughout the trip. Because I wasn’t enough. Because I was deformed and fat and I looked like an apple. Because nobody wanted to be seen near me. And my personality was shitty.

Like, I should’ve known I was worth it. I’m still worth it and I know that. But I wasn’t less worth it when I was chubbier. And maybe I didn’t look as bad as my head made me believe. But at the time my mental health was extremely awful.

Now, covid happened.

Not gonna lie. Quarantine fucked me up as much as it fucked everyone else, but for me...by not going out, I stopped being near trigger foods, and I was even able to consult a dietitian.

I’ve lost 15 kg since March. And I’ve managed to love my past self, but I love this one because changing it was my decision. Sure, my parents didn’t help a lot, but in the end it was MY decision. I’ve come to accept I was worth it even when I felt disgusted by myself, and all of those awful things people said or did to me, like my friend during that trip...

I didn’t deserve any of those things. Because NO ONE deserves to be treated that way.  No one deserves somebody else making fun of them. No one deserves somebody else doing awful things to them that they know damn well that they trigger their childhood trauma. No one deserves to be judged for the way they look.

I was in a very dark place, and sometimes I’m still inside there. And like...during all those times, I kept posting in here.

I remember being next to my dad in the hospital, telling him “Guess what? Supernova drops this week” or “We’re going to watch TDP together, right?” or “Let me talk to you about She-Ra...” ....those were things that like...saved my life for a while, though mostly Supernova. Because, actually, Marissa Meyer has helped me in my fucking darkest years x’d from my third year of high school until now.

Her books didn’t take my depression away, but they did make things a little lighter for me, even when I felt like dying.

And I know this fandom is like..full of minors, so...I don’t know if any of you need to hear this: But you’re worth it.

If you want to change anything in your body, do it because YOU want to.

Because YOU’LL like you better.

Because it’s YOUR body, and it’s the only part of yourself that you and other people can touch.

Nobody should ever tell you you’re worthless because of your weight and your physical appearance. And if they ever do, then they’re the ones who should apologize, not you.

Nobody has the right to mistreat you, abuse you, or use your own body against you.

As for me...my ribs don’t hurt anymore. Nor does my back or my feet, and my breathing is getting better; I took the conscious decision to lose weight but, like I said, now that I’m not in such a dark place, I’m staring to realize that the past me wasn’t as hideous as my mind was making me believe. She was okay; she was broken inside, but she didn’t deserve anything that happened to her, nor did she deserved to treat herself that badly.

I posted my photo just to celebrate that I can finally said I’m not disgusted anymore. I can finally see myself in pictures again. And see my own reflection. Or go through my closet. Or do my makeup, because I LOVE doing my makeup and I was even ashamed of that. I’m not fully okay yet, but I’m healing.

So, if there’s any little Dawnie around here: I hope you give yourself a chance and realize you’re beautiful.

I hope that, if you change, it’s because you wanted to do it.

I hope you know that it’ll get better even if the healing process it’s not that easy.

I hope you know there’s people who love you.

I hope you know that you are beautiful. You were always beautiful and, no matter what path you choose, you’ll always be beautiful.

And worth it.

And human.

And important.

Take care of yourself, because you’re wonderful, no matter your size <3

[sunflowerhae]

butterflies by Kacey musgraves with jeno pls 🥺 I was LITERALLY listening to this song while I saw your post and took it as a sign 🥺

|📣 ▹▹ it WAS a sign my love! Enjoy! Also, I will say this is a bit longer than the others, so yeah lol🦋

Send in your own request!✨🍰🌙

|⚠️ caterpillar’s unfortunate death

“I was just coasting, never really going anywhere. Caught up in a web, I was getting kind of used to staying there”

You’ve known you didn’t like Lee Jeno since you were eight years old.

It was October; the leaves on the ground made loud, crunchy noises that were music to your ears when you walked home, and the weather was just cold enough for your mother to pack you into a light blue jacket and pull a beanie over your head before sending you off with a kiss and your peanut butter and jelly sandwich.

It was the day you had been waiting for, for what seemed like weeks; Miss Stacy’s First Grade Class was going to start raising butterflies.

You had been paired off into groups of four kids to one butterfly. You were in a group with a young girl named Yeri, and two boys named Renjun and Jeno. You would sometimes play tag with Yeri, and Renjun was your tetherball partner. You hadn’t had many interactions with Jeno; the older boy was always too busy playing kickball with the other boys to play with any of the girls - let alone you - but it didn’t matter to you; nothing did. All you could focus on was your beautiful caterpillar, and the excitement you felt about raising and then releasing it.

You had a routine.

Everyday, Renjun and you would come into the class and check on your caterpillar; change it’s water, give it more leaves; anything it needed, you gave it. In the afternoon, after lunch, Jeno and Yeri would do the same. However, that day Yeri had left school at lunch; her retreating figure slumping along as she did the walk of shame to her mother; anxious about the dentist appointment she had. You didn’t think twice before getting up from your spot under the tree and walking to the sand field not far from you; Jeno’s figure in your line of sight. He was waiting for his turn up to kick, laughing at something Na Jaemin had whispered to him, when he felt a small peck on his shoulder.

“H-hi Jeno oppa,” You shyly mumbled while looking down at your light up sketchers, not used to interacting with the elder boy.

“Hi.”

“So um, Yeri unnie left for the day, so I’ll be helping you with your caterpillar duties.”

Jeno gave you a confused look. “Oh, Why did noona leave?”

“Um, a dentist appointment I think.”

He shrugged his shoulders and gave you a weak, “okay,” Before turning back to the game.

You thought it was okay.

But clearly, it was not.

“I don’t understand why we even have to do this.” Jeno whined next to you as you wrote down how much the caterpillar had eaten since this morning to now (2 WHOLE leaves).

“Because, well...it’s cute” you shrugged.

“Well, I don’t want to do this lame work. We wouldn’t have to if we just killed the bug.” You couldn’t believe what you were hearing. Kill the caterpillar? Not on your watch.

“N-no! We can’t kill it! It’s a living thing! Would you kill a cat?”

Jeno’s eyes went wide, and he frantically shook his head. “No! But this isn’t a cat, it’s a caterpillar!” He laughed.

You didn’t think this was a laughing matter, so you gave a small ‘humph’ and turned your head so you weren’t looking at Jeno anymore. Jeno, wanting to play a small joke on you, took this opportunity to silently open the caterpillar's cage, take out said caterpillar, and hide it in between his hands. He thought it was so funny; seeing you turn and freak out because the caterpillar wasn’t there anymore.

What wasn’t funny was when Jeno totally forgot living things need air to breathe.

It was quite a scene to behold; you were standing by the teacher's desk, sobbing so hard that snot came out of your nose, while softly holding the dead caterpillar's body in your little hands and caressing it with your left index finger. You couldn’t help but feel absolutely terrible. Somewhere out there, a little mommy butterfly is wondering when her baby will be home from his adventures in human children's land, and he’ll never return. He’ll never get to turn into a beautiful butterfly, and fly in the wind; spreading his beauty.

Jeno was also trying not the cry. He didn’t mean to kill the caterpillar. He just wanted to play a small prank on the girl he thought was pretty like his mommy. He did actually want to see the caterpillar turn into a butterfly. Renjun tried assuring him that it wasn’t a big deal, but Jeno still felt guilty. Especially when you wouldn’t stop caressing and petting the caterpillar, saying that, that way it doesn’t feel scared, or lonely. Saying that out loud to your teacher made you cry even more, and you didn’t stop crying until you were safely in the arms of your own mommy, while she pet your hair and held you while walking to the car.

The next day, you saw Jeno laughing and playing with his friends; seemingly having forgotten all about the caterpillar incident the day before. Your blood boiled. In the end, you got put into another caterpillar group, and got to release the butterflies anyway; but you never forgot about that one caterpillar incident with Jeno, and you vowed to never let your guard down around the older boy, and to always hate him.

And you had perfectly upheld that vow until sophomore year of high school.

“Now you're lifting me up, instead of holding me down Stealing my heart instead of stealing my crown Untangled all the strings round my wings that were tied”

Week 1

“It’s your fault we’re in here, so shut up!” Jeno had been nothing short of annoying for the past week while you both sat out your punishments in after school detention.

Why were you in after school detention, you ask?

It was no surprise that you two went the ways you did after elementary school. Jeno, being the most popular varsity soccer player by sophomore year - and you, being a valued member (gunning for president by senior year) of the photography club. It was because of the ways you two went, that you ended up in the position of taking the soccer photos for the yearbook. You had to stay at their practice for the whole two hours, but took a break halfway through to catch up on a bit of homework. Jeno, wanting to always be the center of (your) attention, thought it would be a hilarious prank to kick a soccer ball at you while you were looking down at your homework. The first time was harmless. It landed at your feet and startled you, sure, but you just glared at a laughing Jeno while throwing it - albeit, weakly - back. However, the second time he kicked it, neither of you got so lucky.

And that’s how you ended up with a broken $630 camera, Jeno with a bruised (you weren’t that good at punching) nose, and the both of you with a months worth of after school detention.

“My fault?! You’re the one that punched me!” You both sat at opposite ends of the classroom, but that didn’t stop you from fighting. The teacher had walked out to go get more coffee, so you two were free to argue.

“And you’re the one that broke my camera!” You fired back, which initiated you both yelling on top of each other in anger. Jeno wouldn’t usually be too upset about a small incident like this, but after school detention collided with his soccer schedule - which meant that for the next month, Jeno was off the team.

And boy, did he hate that.

“ENOUGH enough! Listen, I really don’t want to talk to you, so you stay on your side and I’ll stay on mine, deal?” You offered, already tired of yelling. Thankfully, Jeno mumbled out a,

“Fine,” and turned his gaze out the window with a sigh, just as the teacher was walking back in.

Week 2

“I need help with my homework.” Many people thought you were an easy A kind of person. You came off as a smart kid, but you secretly kept it in that your grades were genuinely terrible, and just prayed that no one found out.

Usually you would be with your math tutor, but with after school detention, that wasn’t possible. The teacher was, once again, not in the room (that happened a lot, although the times she was there, she was sleeping), and so your only hope was unfortunately, well, Lee Jeno. You knew he was smart - sports kids had to have good grades. You really hoped that he would help you, and wouldn’t laugh, and wouldn’t tell anyone that he did.

When he heard you, he was so ready to laugh in your face and spit out a “no way”, but when he looked up and saw your pouty gaze, well, he was sold. So, instead, he mumbled out a small, “yeah sure” - to which you smiled and took a seat next to him.

It was only once you were already out of the school building did you realize that not only did you two not fight that whole time, but you actually made jokes with each other, and you sat with him the rest of detention.

Shit.

Week 3

“-And so I quickly grabbed her and said ‘no yeri, those aren’t eggs!’ And she spit them out onto the floor while yelling!” The milk Jeno was in the middle of downing quickly flew from his nostrils as he broke out in laughter at the climax of the story you were telling him. You quickly had to shush him while laughing yourself; making wide eyed glances back and forth between him and your detention teachers slumped figure.

It wasn’t that you two were friends, oh no, definitely not. You just had no one else to talk to in detention, so Jeno and you found yourselves sitting next to each other and actually having civilized conversations that didn’t end in having to be separated. The thought of you two being friends still disgusted you, and you refused to admit that you were becoming close.

This is as far as I will get you told yourself.

I only have one more week, and then I can go back to hating him.

But do I still want to?

You didn’t know this, obviously, but Jeno was thinking the same thing.

Week 4

You and Jeno were slowly walking down the empty hallways of your school after your last detention together. Not a word was said between the two of you; both afraid of what might be shared.

You didn’t want to stop talking to Jeno. In the last four weeks, you’ve come to actually enjoy your time together - finding that you had more in common than you thought. While you never would have admitted it before, you’ve always kind of wanted to get to know Jeno, even if you did think he was a jerk. So the idea of not talking to him made you quite upset, though you tried not to show it.

Finally, the two of you got to the entrance doors of your high school, but neither pushed them open. You both just stood there, exchanging awkward glances back and forth, and hoping that the other wouldn’t leave. This went on for around a minute, before something was finally said by Jeno, “y/n, can I be honest,” you nodded, “I don’t want to go back to hating you.”

“Same!” You exclaimed a bit too quickly, the both of you giggling messes at the fact.

“Actually, if it’s alright with you, I was wondering if you, maybe, I don’t know, wanted to see a movie with me tomorrow?” He awkwardly scratched the back of his neck, and in the pit of your stomach, you could feel a lonely little butterfly begin to flap its wings as you nodded at his offer with a smile on your face.

“Now I remember what it feels like to fly You give me butterflies”

The breeze from the open windows pulled and pushed your hair every which way as you closed your eyes and smiled from your spot in the passenger seat.

The speaker was blasting with Kacey Musgraves, and you almost felt yourself falling asleep, but the hand that slid into your own had you opening your eyes and glancing at the boy occupying the driver's seat. He was glancing back and forth between the road and yourself with a smile on his face, and you couldn’t help the content sigh that fell past your lips.

“What’s up, baby?” Jeno mumbled, always worried when it came to you.

“Nothing, you just make me so happy.”

Jeno’s smile widened, and he brought your interlocked hands up to his lips, and kissed the back of your hand, before looking at you and saying, “happy three year anniversary”.

First, your mind is occupied with that little 8th year old girl, crying while glancing down at the dead caterpillar in her hands.

Then, you think back to that moment in front of the entrance doors to your school, where that little butterfly in your stomach popped up for the first time, and your heart warms at the thought that that butterfly lives in a garden of its own kind now.

[obsidianfr3sk]

Beginnings and Endings (Part 1)

@renegadesnet event 2: august of anarchy 

↪ [The Artino Brothers] 

Summary: In the beginning, it was just the two of them: David and Alec, the Artino Brothers. Then, they brought anarchy into the world. Now, David is not sure if there would be enough of themselves by the end of it. "Don't call me Alec anymore. Now I am Ace. Ace Anarchy."

AO3 link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25686343/chapters/62363560

This is my contribution to August of Anarchy. It will be a two-part fic about the relationship between Ace and his brother from David’s POV. We have little information about how their relationship actually was, so I had a lot of fun coming up with headcanons and that kinda stuff.

Thanks so much to @dawniebb and @healing-winston-pratt for the timeline they did that helped me with the creation of this fic. I actually also used it for my other fic, The Origins, but I didn’t remembered you guys did it and I just had the image saved on my phone lol (I can credit you for that if you want me to, there’s no problem with that!) Son las mejores <3

The start of the beginning

Age of anarchy Year 0

His fingers felt hotter and hotter with each golden thread they held. A light coat of sweat ran all over his body, but he wasn't sure if it was because he was nervous or because they didn't have air conditioning and it was midsummer.

It wasn’t like he had no reason to be nervous. He had never used his powers for something so important.

Alec watched every movement and noticed every breath. His dark eyes were slightly closed and his lips were pursed. David had the same face.

"Am I doing something wrong?" he whispered.

"You are doing a good job," Alec said. "Why?"

"Because you haven't stopped watching every move I make and—"

"Don't worry, it's not personal—" he pursed his lips more "—I'm always watching."

David rolled his eyes. "You're lurking."

Alec picked up a dry cloth on the splintered coffee table and rubbed it across his brother’s forehead. David thanked him.

"That's not true," Alec replied, "I just enjoy staring at people from the shadows. It is a healthy hobby ”

"I'm sure it isn't."

But hey, what did David know about healthy hobbies? All he had done in those last months was accompany his brother to work during the day and watch television until late at night. Those were his hobbies. And he wasn't even sure if the first one counted as one.

David had been expelled from his school more than six months ago after the principal found out that he was a prodigy. According to her, that was not the reason for his expulsion. It was that he had lied and it was illegal to lie about your status as a prodigy for profit.

"So you do accept schools for prodigies have a lower educational level than schools for non-prodigies?" Alec asked the principal with a defiant attitude.

When Alec tried to enroll him in another school, he discovered that she had already warned the entire school district about David and no elementary school would be accepting him in the near future. He refused to enroll David in a school for prodigies because he would only fall behind in his studies. Apparently, those schools did not receive half the funds that the other schools received.

"Because they’re for ordinary kids," said David, "and I'm not."

“You are not an ordinary kid, that's true. You are extraordinary. Do not let anyone tell you otherwise."

In the beginning, David had remained positive. It was fun to accompany Alec to work, just like the old days. But the weeks passed and it was increasingly difficult not to miss his friends, his favorite teachers, and the math lessons that he liked so much. How did Alec never get tired of the monotony?

"Look, it's already taking shape," Alec exclaimed.

He was right.

"Do you think it looks like the one in your drawing?" he asked him.

"I don't want to give a verdict until you finish it, but yeah, it's a lot like it."

For David, Alec was a great artist. He was also a good brother and a remarkable student, judging by the diplomas on the walls of their old house. At the time, he had also been a good son, although David could not give proof of it. And neither did their parents.

Seven years ago, their parents had died in an explosion at the offices of the organization they were part of. It was called "Prodigies for the Alliance with the Non-Prodigies". His father preferred to call it "Anarchist Group" because the original name was “fucking dumb”. Over time, David realized that the real reason he called it like that was that he liked to see his wife frown every time he referred to her as "fellow anarchist Bianca."

"We are not anarchists," her mother insisted as she used her powers to levitate her cup of coffee. When she was angry, her blue eyes turned red. "We are—"

"Anarchists" interrupted his father. He turned his spoon into gold and raised an eyebrow.

“It is forbidden to use your powers at the table, Alessandro. And no, we are rebels. ”

"Anarchist rebels!" Alec exclaimed.

"Alec, your cereal, you're going to spill it!"

That was his last memory of them.

The news said it had been an accident with the gas pipes. There were some other theorizing that it had been a dispute between members of the organization.

"After all, so many prodigies in one place cannot be trusted," said a young lady from the newscast. “The prodigies are violent, even with each other. They don’t always know how to con—"

Alec appeared behind him and turned off the television.

"Don't watch that. Those are lies."

They had just returned from the funeral. David had not taken off his coat yet.

"Really?" he asked.

His brother nodded. “It was not an argument or an accident. It was an attack. And I have evidence to prove it. ”

The next day, he took David to the police station. Alec explained to the policemen about the bricks thrown at the windows of their house, about the graffiti that appeared on the porch, and about the death threats, their parents constantly received. He even showed them a box full of evidence, with photos and letters. But the only thing the policemen did was laugh at him and knock both brothers out of the place after Alec had the great idea of using his powers against them. That definitely hadn't helped their case.

"Mom would have thrown a chair at that idiot officer, too," Alec told him as they drove back to the house.

"I envy you," David mumbled.

"Why?"

"Because you will always have something of hers that I don't," he answered.

"David, look at yourself in a mirror. You are her living portrait. That is something I will never have.”

From then on, he took David everywhere, to the park, to the bank, or to the two jobs he had so they could pay the bills. David asked who would take care of him when Alec left for college in the fall.

"I won’t be going to college," he replied. "I already have other plans."

After so long, David finally found out about his brother's plans. He knew every last detail. They had spent sleepless nights talking about it and wondering what their parents would think. David was convinced that his father would be delighted, but he wasn't quite sure about his mother’s reaction. Alec assured him she would understand.

They had already tried everything. It was time for someone to do something for real. And that someone, was going to be Alec.

Finally, the helmet materialized in front of them. It was made of the most precious gold of all and identical to how David had imagined it.

Alec closed his eyes and held out his hand. The helmet began to levitate and slowly settled over his head. The sun streaming through the window revealed tiny golden particles floating around him. When Alec opened his eyes again, he appeared more fierce than ever. However, David was not afraid; he was amazed at his work.

"Perfect," Alec whispered. "It feels perfect. Nice job."

"Thank you…"

Alec stood up and headed for the door. "Well, I guess it’s showtime."

David jumped up and hurried to put on his shoes to catch up. Alec was about to leave when he realized what his younger brother was doing.

"No, David, you stay," he ordered.

"What? Why?" he asked indignantly.

“It is not an appropriate show for eleven-year-olds."

"But-"

"David."

Alec had not inherited his mother's eyes, but he had definitely inherited that horrible look that could intimidate even the bravest of humans.

David backed away, feeling pathetic and childish. The fact he was wearing one shoe and had a yogurt stain on his shirt didn't make him look more mature. He sat down on the floor and hid his face between his legs.

Don't cry, don't cry, don't cry.

"But who's going to take care of me?" he mumbled.

His older brother rolled his eyes as he approached him. “You are old enough to be alone for a couple of hours. Or days. "

"Days?!" 

He had never been alone for more than five minutes when Alec went to the store across the street. It was too much responsibility, how would he be able to handle it?

Then, Alec lifted him off the ground. David gasped. His brother had never been able to do that with such ease, but he had no time to be amazed, because judging by his expression, Alec was not looking happy at all.

“David, listen. This is not a game."

"I know," he replied, doing his best to imitate his mother's frown.

"I know you know it," Alec said. He hadn't intimidated him. “But I want to be sure that you understand the magnitude of what I'm about to do. It will be a massive change in the way the world is controlled. ”

David crossed his arms and looked away. Alec gently returned him to the ground and ruffled his hair, slightly chuckling. David couldn't help but smile. Just a little though. He didn't want his brother to think he agreed with the decision he had made.

There was no point arguing with him. The more time his brother spent there, the longer the beginning of the end would be delayed.

Immediately, he mentally corrected himself. Alec had said not to call it the beginning of the end. What he was going to do was not the end of anything; it was the start of the beginning.

"What do I do while you’re gone?" he asked, without turning to see him.

Alec put his hands on his shoulders. "Stay here as long as you can. Secure all doors and windows and don't go out unless it’s absolutely— ”

Somebody knocked on the door. Alec and David held their breath for the ten seconds that person stood outside their apartment. A couple of letters slipped under the door and the person left. 

David wanted to go pick up the mail, but his brother's grip grew stronger.

"Don't stop to help anyone, David," Alec went on. "As long as I'm not there, you're the only one who can protect you. Do you understand? No one else matters, no one else will help you. Only you can help yourself." He took him by the chin to make him look him in the eye. "Understood, David?"

He had never seen his brother have such a severe expression. Alec had never spoken so seriously to him and had never forced him to look at him. For a second, David thought that it was the helmet that made his brother seem more frightening. But it couldn’t be that.

After all, the world was about to change. It made sense that Alec changed too.

Would David change?

"Understood, Alec," he replied.

"Don't call me Alec anymore." He released his chin and smiled at him. “Now I am Ace. Ace Anarchy. ”

"Ace Anarchy," David repeated. He let the name finish to visualize inside his head. "I like how it sounds."

Alec ruffled his hair once more. "I knew you would like it, my little nightmare."

[coconut-cluster]

IS THERE LIKE SOME MORE HEAD CANNONS FOR THE AU CUZ I'M EXCITED FOR THIS (I LIKE LOVE HS AUS AND YOUR ONE OF MY FAVORITE WRITERS 💀💀💛💛)

oh thank you so much! (the story itself will probably be a bullet point fic, because frankly they’re less stressful and quicker to write on my end lol)

okay let’s see (under the cut because looooong whoops)

the gang all meet up at a little retro diner every friday after school and order milkshakes

Roman and Remus’ parents are practically rich, so whenever one of the others needs something, usually Ro offers to buy it without hesitating (Remus more often suggests stealing, but he’s all for Roman’s suggestion instead after they shoot down the whole thievery thing)

For instance, when Virgil’s hoodie gets ripped right as the weather gets cold, and he makes a few worried remarks about not having the supplies to sew it up since his first paycheck won’t come for another two weeks, Roman comes in the next day with a new jacket that he quietly hands him before band starts. 

(It’s black with purple embroidery on the sleeves, with a little stormcloud emblem on the chest - that’s the first time Roman makes Virgil blush, though he doesn’t see it.)

Roman is first chair trumpet, and the other trumpets actually kind of hate him? Not necessarily because he’s first - at least that’s what they say - but they don’t talk to him in band unless they’re making snide remarks, and they’re far more critical of his playing than anyone else. Roman claims it doesn’t bother him, but when the rest of his section posts about their after-concert meetup at a restaurant (which he isn’t invited to), he’s quiet for the rest of the evening. 

Dee and Patton hang out at Patton’s house a lot, since Dee’s parents (Patton’s aunt and uncle) kinda suck; Dee teaches Patton how to make scones, and Patton teaches him how to make the best hot chocolate. They’re a lot closer than a lot of kids at school seem to think.

Logan and Dee are co-captains of the debate team and have a “friendly” rivalry that’s pretty much only friendly for Patton’s sake, although they do enjoy discussing philosophy and trash-talking their crappy sociology teacher

Virgil writes songs in an old and well-loved journal; he doesn’t share them with anyone, but there’s a few about his new friends, and they’re definitely his favorite

Roman gets burnt out super easily, between his three sports and two performing arts, and with his insecurities about/constant desperate studying for math and science, he’s kind of always tired? He’s a naturally energetic person, but sometimes it all catches up with him and he just falls asleep where he is

(Like the time the gang’s on a weekend road trip and he falls asleep on Virgil’s shoulder, which Remus doesn’t let either of them live down for the next month)

((Virgil was kind of a mess about it because Roman looked so peaceful-))

Patton and Logan have been best friends since childhood and know each other like the back of their hands; they have had exactly three fights and feel awful about all of them

(One time, Logan’s aunt told them they would make a cute couple, and they both simultaneously stuck their tongues out at her. She didn’t know how to respond so she just nodded and never said it again.)

Patton plays ukulele and Logan plays his triangle accompaniment with a completely straight face. No one can tell if they’re a musical act or a comedy act, but they’ve won the talent show three years in a row. 

Dee is an exceptional speech writer and has a lot of awards from speech competitions - he’s a real audience charmer!

Remus and Roman once made a rule that they could never audition for the same role in theater so as not to foster unnecessary animosity between them, but it turns out not to be a problem because they never actually want the same roles anyway. Remus is way more of a villain kinda guy than Roman.

The whole gang comes to Roman’s baseball games to cheer him on - the first time Virgil comes, he brings a foam finger and waves it around with a completely straight face the whole game, and Roman has never wanted to punch (or kiss) someone so badly. 

Virgil is genuinely excited and bouncing on his toes the whole day when he finds out there’s an ice rink near the school; he played hockey at his old schools, he tells the gang, and he’s been trying to find somewhere to play it again since his family moved. They all head to the rink the next day and try to learn how to play - V goes easy on them, except Remus, who is remarkably good and scarily excited about the rough-housing. Regardless, it’s nice to see Virgil so happy. 

Patton and Roman hang out at each other’s houses a lot just to eat ice cream and talk about school, especially when they’re stressed

Remus’ bedroom has a lot of bars across the ceiling that he installed himself because he is, as he tells the others when they ask, “more comfortable when I’m looking down on everyone else.” Roman just snorts before Remus punches his shoulder.

The second ever time Roman makes Virgil blush (instead of the other way around) is before a band concert - Roman gets his nerves out via musicals, and without thinking, he sweeps Virgil up into a dance and sings My Petersburg from Anastasia. When they have to go onstage, Virgil has to take a second to himself because his face is so red. 

(On another note, Roman smells like vanilla and oranges, and Virgil realizes all his flirting might not just be to annoy Ro.)

Remus and Dee are like the chaotic neutral to Logan and Patton’s chaotic good. no i will not elaborate.

Virgil joins the soccer team in his first spring semester because his guidance counselor suggests he join a sport to “get all the nervous energy out before it builds up.”

(”What about therapy, Sharon?” is, apparently, not the correct answer to that suggestion)

He and Roman have regular arguments about whether baseball or soccer is the superior sport

(Regardless, Roman shows up to Virgil’s first match with a foam finger and vindicated smile)

Patton is Virgil’s number one supporter in literally everything and literally makes him lunches sometimes, complete with a note doodled on the paper bag

Virgil grumbles about it but he totally loves it

OUTFIT CHECK BECAUSE I WANT TO (pretend they’re cartoon characters and wear the same thing everyday lol): 

Remus: black and green bomber jacket, old band tee, and jeans that are like two inches too short for him; Dee: yellow knit turtleneck and black jeans (black denim jacket optional); Roman: red-orange-white striped sweater and red jeans, unless he’s in his baseball uniform; Virgil: Black and purple hoodie, black tee, and black ripped jeans; Logan: white button down under dark blue sweater, dark pants; Patton: blue sweatshirt or Hawaiian shirt, khaki shorts

[lovemesomesurveys]

If you were a witch, which animal would be your familiar? I don’t what a familiar is or anything about witchcraft.

If there's a design on your shirt, what is it? I literally just described it in the previous survey I did, but it has Ralphie from A Christmas Story on it with a bar of soap in his mouth and says, “Oh, fudge”, which is a quote from the movie.

If it was possible to colonize any planet and you were the leader, which planet would you choose? I really wouldn’t want to be the leader of anything. I’m not fit for that.

Is there a piece of technology that you just can't live without? I mean, I’m pretty attached to my laptop and phone, but of course if for some reason I couldn’t have them I would survive, but it’d be really quite boring. I don’t have much to do.

Would you ever visit a ghost town? That would be interesting.

What's the last thing you ordered from the last fast food place you went to? Loaded potato wedges and 3 egg rolls from Jack in the Box.

Which natural disaster scares you the most? They all sound terrifying. I’ve never experienced one. What're your religious beliefs and why do you follow them? I’m a Christian. I believe in God and that Jesus died for our sins and is our Savior.

What do you think happens after you die? I believe in heaven and hell.

What would you do if you found out your life was only a simulation controlled by someone else? That’s scary. I’ve had thoughts like that, though. Like a Truman Show scenario or that one day I’ll wake up and find out my whole life has been a dream.

What's the scariest thing you've accidentally found on the internet? Ugh, I HATED when jump scare things would go around. Like, people would disguise as a link for something else and then you click it and it’s some ugly, creepy looking girl screaming really loud. OH, and there was that one with the car that was driving down some winding road and you’re watching and waiting to see what the video is about and then bam! something pops up on the scream and scares you. Ughhh. Not cool. I’m such a jumpy person as it is already.

Is there anything bothering you right now? The usual stuff as always.

Thinking of every Halloween costume you've had, which one was the most creative? I never had a really creative one. They were pretty simple.

What song are you currently listening to and what song was the last you listened to? I’m not listening to music.

What's the picture on your calendar for this month? I don’t have a calendar for this year at the moment.

If you were a mythical creature, which would you be? A fairy.

If you were an animal, which would you be? A dog.

Were you ever bullied when you were younger and how did you handle it? I wasn’t, fortunately. It was something my parents worried about when I was in elementary school because I’m in a wheelchair, but honestly I never had any issues with anyone. The only bullying I receive is from myself on a regular basis. 

What do you remember most from being five years old? I have some vague, bits and pieces of memories from kindergarten. 

What do you remember most from being ten years old? I have some memories from 4th grade. My favorite teacher ever was my 4th grade teacher (who later ended up teaching 8th grade and I had him again) and I remember funny stuff he did and like how he read out loud to us books such as Matilda and he would the voices and made it fun for us. He also used to sing, and I remember one time he led all of us in a rendition of “I Want It That Way” by The Backstreet Boys lol. He was so cool. Oh, and he was known for doing “the robot” dance and miming. 

What do you remember most from being fifteen years old? Stuff from high school.

What does the last person you found attractive look like? Alexander Skarsgard is 6′4, has blonde hair, blue eyes, is very fit and in shape, and Swedish. He’s absolutely gorgeous.

Have you ever thrown something away and then wanted it back? Yes. I hold onto a lot of stuff that will sit in a box somewhere forever, but then if I get rid of something I’ll suddenly wish I still had it or have a need for it again.

What's one random city you want to visit? Seattle.

If you owned a store, what would you most likely sell? Books. It would have a cafe, too.

If you had a garden, what sort of plants would you grow? I don’t know, man. I have zero interest in gardening.

What's your favorite phase of the moon? I don’t have one.

What're your plans for today? I’ll attend my church’s livestream and then do the normal things I do everyday. 

What's the song for your life right now? I don’t know.

Do you believe that when you die, you get to see all your loved ones again? Yes.

Who would you be the most excited to see? My grandparents. 

Have you lost or almost lost someone close to you to death this year? Not so far...  I don’t want to think about that.

Did you lose any of your friends this year and if so, how? I don’t have any friends to lose. 

Have you experienced anything new this year and if so, what? Not so far, but we’re only in January. 

Do you enjoy reading National Geographic magazines? I’ve only read a few. 

Would you rather read the book or watch the movie? I love to read and I’m down to check out the movie.

Do you know anyone who's serving in the military right now? No.

Does or did either of your parents serve in the military? Nope.

Has anything in your house ever caught on fire? No.

Have you ever hugged a stranger you thought was someone else? No. Omg, that would be super embarrassing. I’ve waved to someone I thought was someone else, but never went so far as to hug someone I thought was someone else.  As a small child, did you ever feel as if you were different or weird? No, not really.

If you could instantly know any language in the world, what would it be? I’d like to be fluent in Spanish.

This year, how many times have you been to the doctor? So far just once. I go once a month and we’re only in January. 

Do you have a library card and if so, do you use it often? Nope. I haven’t had a library card since I was in high school.

Do you like romcoms and if you do, which one is your favorite? Yeah, I’m a sucker for the romcoms. I have several favorites.

Thinking of your ex and the person you love, are they similar in any way at all? I don’t have a significant other or someone I’m interested in at the moment.

Is there something you currently want and/or need that you can’t have? Yes.

Thinking back to six weeks ago, were you happier then or are you happier now and why? Neither then or now. 

Who's the first male you can think of whose name begins with "T" and what can you tell me about him? Thomas, my maternal grandpa. He sadly passed away 10 years ago. Both of my maternal grandparents passed away. I was very close with both of them and losing them was very hard for me. I miss them both every single day. My grandpa was an amazing man. He was the best husband, father, and grandpa. He was hardworking. He provided well for his family. He was loving. He was so funny. He told the best stories. He was known for being a talker haha, he could go on and on for hours, but everyone always wanted to hear what he had to say. And sometimes he’d go off on tangents, but the stories always came for circle. He was just an incredible man, well loved and missed by many.

Can you say "happy birthday" in another language? Yeah, “Feliz cumpleaños.” 

What subjects do you or did you get the worst grades in? Math was always my worst subject, I barely scraped by with Cs.

Should you be concentrating on something else instead of this survey? Nah. This is my nighttime routine.

Have you ever told someone that you loved them and they rejected you? I didn’t tell them I loved them, but I expressed my feelings for them and was rejected. Twice.

Do you know anyone else that's happened to? Yeah.

Is there anything you want to say to someone, but you can’t or won’t? Not at this time. What're your reasons for not saying it? --

Who's someone in the music industry you think is overrated? Taylor Swift. Don’t for me, Swifties. 

Who's the eleventh contact in your phone and when did you last see or speak to that person? I’m not checking. 

What’s your mother’s middle name? I’m not sharing that.

When was the last time you ate cake and what type of cake was it? I had some red velvet cake a few days ago.

Have you ever been told you were too good or not good enough for someone you loved? I had friends who said I was too good for Joseph. I wasn’t good enough, though.

Why do you think someone would say that to you? They didn’t like how he treated me and thought he was too immature.

If the last person you kissed said you were the only one they wanted, would you believe them? That was 8 years ago, I don’t see him ever saying that now...

Who was your first crush, how do you feel about that person now and do you still talk to them? My first crush was this kid Philip when I was in 3rd grade lol it was just some little crush, I was 9. He didn’t even know me.

Who was the last person that apologized to you and what was it for? I don’t recall.

So how're things going with the person you love? There’s no such person.

Are you "in love" with the last person you kissed? No. I moved on years ago.

Do you have photos to go with all of the contacts in your phone? I haven’t added a photo for any of my contacts.

Who was the last person to comment on one of your photos on Facebook and how did you meet that person? I think it was my Nana. 

How many of your friends are sexually active?

To finish, is there anything you would like to say to someone? Sigh.

Do you think surveys are annoying? They can be sometimes, but I really do enjoy doing them. Clearly.

What career paths are you considering? I don’t know. :/

Do you watch music videos? I haven’t in a long time.

Have you ever clicked on those banner ads that promise a prize for clicking? No. I definitely don’t miss popup ads. 

What kind of computer are you using? Macbook Air.

What kind of computer do you wish you were using? I’m happy with this one.

Have you ever had a weight change so drastic you went to the doctor? I didn’t see a doctor for it specifically, but yeah it was concerning. It’s still a problem I’m struggling with. 

How cold does it have to be before you put on a sweater? In the 60s F, I’d say. 

Do you eat things off the floor? Never.

Who do people say you look like? My mom.

Do you usually get your homework done on time? I’m done with school, but yeah I always got my homework done on time. I may have been a major procrastinator, but my work always got done.

Have you ever framed your old movie ticket stubs? Not framed, but kept.

Do you have a digital camera? Nope.

Have you ever stuck something inappropriate in an electrical outlet? No. I’m afraid to plug in things that meant to go in there as it is.

What do you have anything scheduled for the 16th of this or next month? We’re past the 16th now, but no I didn’t have anything going on that day and I don’t have anything planned for that day next month either.

Can you sleep without any pillows? No. I can’t sleep flat, I have to be propped up.

Is there a color you refuse to wear? I don’t like to wear white.

Has anyone ever pulled a gun on you? No, but I am a victim of random gun violence. 

Are there any chairs in your bedroom? My chair. There’s an ottoman that could also be a chair as well.

How many pairs of shoes do you have? Like 6 or 7.

How much was the last item of clothing you bought? My total was $40 for 2 shirts, but I ordered online so there’s additional fees. 

Where's your father right now? He’s in his room asleep.

Do you skip breakfast often? Yeah.

How many days has it been since your last birthday? My birthday was 6 months ago.

Do you want any more siblings than you have now? Nah, at 31 years old I can’t imagine having another sibling. 

Would you make a good president or prime minister? Nope. I have no desire to be one.

Are you going out of the country soon and if so, where to? No. I don’t have any travel plans and who knows when I will at this point. :(

Do you ever feel like you want to get away from everything? Yeppp.

Do you need a haircut? I could use a trim.

When was the last time you went on a trampoline? Never.

Were you alone today? I’m alone right now in my room cause everyone else is asleep, but they’re here in the house. My dad is off today and will be home all day. My mom and brother have work, but they’ll be home at some point.

Who was the last person you saw today? The day isn’t over yet, it’s only 4:51AM, but I’m willing to bet my brother will be the last person I see cause he and I stay up late.

[sugarcrash]

Clumsy // Ethan Dolan

 (A/N: So, I’m taking up writing again, now that I’ve gotten the swing of things in the new school year! Feel free to request! Also, ya’ll better be grateful, this took a long time to write and it’s 4,396 words lol)

Summary: When Y/N gets clumsy, she ends up making a mess - on Ethan Dolan. So how will it go down when they meet again?

Warnings: Swearing, quite a long intro (lol sorry)

*****************************************************************

“Ugh.” Y/N groaned at her phone. The alarm had been going off for the past minute, blasting the same annoying tune into her ears. Rolling over, she hit the “stop” button on the glowing screen.

The girl turned to snuggle back into her sheets when the door opened, revealing her mother, who was still in her pajamas.

“Y/N, you’ve really got to stop setting that thing so loud.” she complained. “It’s woken your brother up twice this week, and I honestly can’t handle it anymore.”

The young lady smirked into her pillow. Her 10 year old brother, Tyson, was a crazy creature when woken up early. She heard his tinny little voice singing the obnoxious Pokemon theme song, and it was clear he was seeking attention.

“Ty!” her mom stalked to the little boy. Y/N listened in silence as she heard her mother scold him for almost waking up their cranky father.

Just as she was checking the time on her iPhone, her older brother, Asher, appeared at her doorway. “Hey nerd, gonna get up or what?” he raised an eyebrow. 

Y/N let out a sigh and shifted her head to meet his eyes. “Just because I wear glasses doesn’t mean I’m a nerd, y’know.”

Asher rolled his pupils to the ceiling. “Well, the glasses and the fact that you’ve never gotten a grade lower than a straight B.” he knew she couldn’t argue with that.

“Whatever. Now leave so I can get dressed.” he did so, shutting the door behind him.

Y/N lugged herself out of bed and stared at her body in the full length mirror next to her dresser. She rubbed her tired eyes before glancing at the digital clock on her wall, which read 5:30 am.

“Why does school have to start so early?” she whined to herself as she bent over to her drawers, shifting through them before finding some simple black leggings and a pale yellow sweatshirt, one of her favorite outfits.

Before Y/N threw them on her body, though, she gave herself a quick sniff. Sure, she’d taken a shower last night, she smelled fine, but the bra she had been wearing for the past two weeks did not. She quickly changed her bra and panties before noticing there was a red splotch on her underwear.

“No, no no! Shit! You’re not supposed to be here for another week!” Y/N grumbled. Thankfully, she never put her tampons in the bathroom. Not only is it farther away from her room, so she’d have to run in bloody panties, but Asher and Tyson would probably find them.

She reached to her secret stash in her nightstand, pulling out the familiar blue-wrapped tube.

After she put in the tampon, she shoved on her clothes and rushed to brush her teeth. While she was doing so, Y/N received a text from her best friend, Lola.

*Text*

L: Hey babes!

L: How ya doing?

Y/N: Not good, Aunt Flo decided to visit

L: Aww u poor thing! Cramps start yet?

Y/N: Nope, just waiting in agony. I hate having to walk around school with a little box of tampons

L: U can do it! For women everywhere!

Y/N: Cheers, bitch

*End*

Y/N spit the foamy toothpaste down the drain, watching it swirl as she got lost in her thoughts. Wasn’t that math quiz today? No, that was tomorrow. Would she see her crush, Alex? Would he acknowledge her?

“C’mon, dork, if you want a ride, get a move on!” Asher announced, walking down the hallway. Y/N grabbed her laptop and phone from her desk, brushing her hair as she made her way down the stairs. She grabbed her backpack from the coat rack, shoving her electronics and hairbrush inside before checking to make sure her tampon box was ready to go.

In the little flimsy plastic pouch she had found in a tampon kit for this very reason, there were three orange paper tubes. With a sigh, she stuffed them in her low side pocket on her leggings, throwing on some random socks and her Adidas tennis shoes.

Y/N checked the time again. 5:45. School started in around 20 minutes, and it was 15 or so minutes away from the house. ‘We’re gonna make it’ Y/N decided as she pulled her hair into a quick ponytail.

With her backpack over her shoulder, she wen to the kitchen to look for breakfast when Asher shouted “Think fast!” Before she knew it, Y/N was hit in the face with a breakfast bar.

She leaned over, face twisting into a mad expression when she saw what it was. She picked it up, then complain loudly to her 18-year-old brother. “Asher, you idiot!”

“Keep it down! Dad’s trying to sleep!” her sleepy mother came downstairs, Tyson weaving in between her legs.

“Mommy said that’s a potty word!” he announced, making Y/N roll her eyes. She needed to escape this mess, so with her breakfast bar in hand, she turned the handle and stepped out the front door. 

She hopped into Asher’s worn-down pickup truck, a gift from their grandfather on his 16th birthday. Y/N’s older brother soon appeared in the driver’s seat, using the key to start the car. Y/N pulled some headphones over her ears and let the music consume her.

A few minutes later, Asher pulled his car into the school parking lot with an abrupt stop, as to get Y/N’s attention. He lunged forward a bit, her headphones slipping off her ears.

“We’re here, sis.”

“Well, duh, I know.” the 15-year-old grumped.

“Alright, then get out.”

Y/N huffed and opened the car door, stepping out and taking a deep breath before starting toward the doors.

She looked down at her phone, and the time read 6:10. She had exactly five minutes before classes started and she was in trouble.

Y/N practically ran to the front doors, almost falling twice before reaching them and yanking the metal handles, revealing a main area full of students, most groggy.

She rushed to her locker, twirling the familiar lock to the right combo when Lola appeared next to her. 

“Hey, hon.” she chirped. Lola had always been a morning person, whereas Y/N was not.

“Hey.” the girl’s locker swung open, the small mirror reflecting her face. She gave a little smile to it before stuffing her backpack inside the cold metal space, grabbing the materials for her first class, language and literature.

“Aren’t you so glad that we have lang and lit this hour? Poor Maddie, having to go to math first.”

Y/N nodded her head just as the warning bell sounded, demanding that students get themselves ti their classes before they needed a  late pass. “Better start walking. We don’t need Mrs. Cooper getting mad at us again.” she nudged Lola, teasing her for yesterday’s mistake.

“Okay, okay, shut up.” she groaned at the memory. “Don’t look now, but someone’s right there!” her voice dropped to a singsong-ish whisper, and Y/N blushed, knowing just who she was speaking of. 

She glanced and caught his eye as they passed. His.

Alex Kallio’s.

The brown-haired boy had been Y/N’s crush since eighth grade, but he never noticed her. He fit in with the popular crowd. She did not. It only actually worked in movies.

“Y’know, Hayden was over there, too.” the girl told her friend. Her cheeks instantly flushed, and Y/N smiled. “You can’t deny it anymore.”

“I don’t have a crush on him! God!” her face was adorned with playful annoyance as the young lady next to her rolled her eyes, showing that her little love was all too obvious.

“Sure, whatever you say.”

“Stop it!” Lola whined. They pretended to be mad at one another before looking at one another, bursting into laughter.

They then reached the door. “Wanna know something?” Lola asked Y/N, who nodded. “I think one of the Dolans was totally looking at you.”

“No way. They’re, like, the most popular sophomores. And so handsome.”

“Looks like someone has two new crushes. Move over Alex, here come Ethan and Grayson.” the two giggled and took their seats just as the teacher walked in.

“Good morning, class.” Mrs. Cooper spoke, her voice filling the room.

“Good morning, Mrs. Cooper.” the class groaned back.

There was a click from the door and in waltzed the Dolan twins, goofy smiles on their faces. “Sorry.” they apologized together, but it was clear that the word meant nothing.

“Boys! We’ve talked about this before, you can’t continue to be late to class every day!” Mrs. Cooper scolded the teens.

Y/N raised her eyebrows and closed her eyes, her ears soon filling with the daily lecture on how it’s important to be a good student, and blah, blah, blah.

The twins sort of just stood there, secretly stealing looks and rolling their eyes at their friends, showing that it was clearly not a care. Then Ethan caught Y/N’s glance for a split second, and that’s when she realized she’d been staring.

“Lola!” she hissed at her friend. “How long was I looking?”

The girl let out a giggle. “The whole damn time.”

Y/N groaned and hid her face in her hands at Lola’s response, lifting it up only to see that class was starting.

*Time Skip*

Finally, 4th period. Lunch. Y/N could finally hang out with all her friends at once, rather than having to pass along notes and retell stories over and over again.

Y/N subconsciously walked into the cafeteria, lost in her thoughts. She found herself heading over to the lunch line, thinking about her love life.

“Do I really want Alex? What about Ethan? Or Grayson? I suppose there’s always that one kid, Adam, who’s always been nice to me.” she thought to herself, grabbing a tray from the stack.

As she made her way down the line, she noticed that the kids at the popular table somehow got a hold on a small foam football. She shook her head, getting a focus back on reality, rather than daydreaming and watching.

Y/N waited patiently as the long line got shorter, until she was next to get food. A school cook scooped some spaghetti onto her little tray, along with some salad.  Just as she had gotten out of line, she turned to her usual table, where all her friends were placed. 

Y/N began to fast walk toward them, not looking at her surroundings. Neither was Ethan Dolan, who, at the moment, was making an attempt to catch the small football before it hit the ground. He caught the ball in a jump and settled on the ground

Y/N was walking forward, but her head turned when she looked across the room, getting back to her thinking. She headed straight toward Ethan and, BAM! They collided.

Y/N spaghetti flew out of her hands , landing on her favorite sweatshirt with a thump, probably leaving a stain. She fell backwards onto her butt, the small tampon pack in her leggings flinging out, unclasping and sending the products all over the floor. 

Ethan had barely flinched at the contact.

He took a look at who had crashed into him, before realizing what a mess the girl was in. He immediately ran to go get napkins for her, as she got herself up and tried to gather everything.

People started to laugh as they noticed what had happened, and Y/N felt hot tears begin to prick at her eyes. “I’m so stupid, so clumsy.” she thought.

Ethan came back while she was still attempting to clean, though it was hard. She sat on her knees for a moment, resting her hands on her sides before feeling around.

Her tampon box was gone. Y/N started to mentally freak out, now frantically looking before someone found them and she got even more embarrassed. But it was hard to search, seeing that her eyes were blurry with tears.

“Hey, are you okay?” Ethan asked. Y/N only nodded her head. “Are you looking for something?”

She was about to nod again, stopping herself and realizing that, if she told him, he’d want to help, and he’d have to know what it was. She decided against his help, responding with a short “No.”

“Well, it looks like you are. Here, I’ll help.”

Y/N panicked as he looked on the floor, trying to find something that he didn’t even know what it is was, before his eyes settled on the bright orange tampon wrappers, along with the little blue box. Y/N was doomed.

The muscular boy picked them up and smiled, proud of himself that he did something right, but then Ethan realized what they were.

Both sophomore’s faces flushed with embarrassment as people realized their predicament, roaring with laughter around them.

“A-Are these yours?” Ethan asked sheepishly.

Y/N snatched them out of his hand, touching it for only a second, but long enough for something to spark. She looked into his eyes, then tore her gaze away, sprinting out of reach and into the empty hallway.

Once alone in the girl’s bathroom, Y/N broke down, tears running down her cheeks. Her favorite sweatshirt was ruined, she embarrassed herself and a popular kid in front of the whole school, and her crush would probably never look at her again.

The door burst open with a bang, hitting the wall behind it, and in came her friends Lola, Maddie, and Zoe.

“Oh my god, are you okay?” Maddie asked. 

“We saw the whole thing!” Zoe exclaimed.

Lola sat down next to Y/N, and the two other followed. They gave her a huge group hug and let her cry.

After Y/N was finished, Lola suggested that she get a new shirt. The girl agreed, and the four went to the office to look for something in the lost and found.

“Well, honey, why don’t you go look in the bin? There should be a shirt or two in there.” the secretary told the girls.

They sifted through the large blue bucket and found two shirts, an old white one that smelled awful and was looking a little yellow, and a stupid Lego Batman shirt that was in pretty good condition, but smelled as if someone mixed too much cologne and sweat together.

“No doubt, these are from the boy’s locker room.” Zoe pinched her nose with her left hand as she used the right one to hold the shirt far away from her while she examined it.

“Whatever. At least it’s better than the one I’m wearing now.” Y/N grabbed the dangling shirt and sighed before marching to the bathroom.

A few minutes later, Y/N came back into the office. The shirt fit her perfectly, giving a sign that it was probably from some nerdy kid with no build whatsoever.

“Oh, good, sweetie, you found something. Now, you kids better get back to class before your teachers get mad.” the secretary instructed. The four girls nodded and headed out.

Once alone in the hallway, Maddie spoke up. “Okay, like, I know this whole thing was traumatizing for you, Y/N, but can we just talk about how cute you and Ethan would be?”

Zoe and Lola laughed, but Y/N quickly clamped a hand down on Maddie’s mouth. “Don’t! Someone could hear!”

“Yeah, but it’s not like it’s a false statement.” Zoe giggled.

Lola smirked. “Totally. I ship.” 

Y/N covered her ears, playfully getting annoyed at her friends and running ahead of them, making the girls chase after her. They reached the sophomore hallway, laughing as they rushed to their lockers as to not be later than they already were.

Y/N collected her binder, pencil case, and laptop before turning to her friends. “Bye guys, see you after class.”

“Bye.” they called in unison.

The rest of the day went on painfully slow, and Y/N was called out several times during the day, getting comments on how she was clumsy or embarrassing. But there were always a few nice kids who asked her if she was okay.

By the time the bell rang at the end of the day, the girl was exhausted. Sh had been assigned at least 5 pages of homework, and probably an essay or two. But she couldn’t really say, because she hadn’t been paying that much attention.

To top of all the bad luck of the day, Ethan hadn’t looked at her again. No matter how many times Y/N attempted to catch his eye, he’d purposely turn his head the other way. They both knew what he was doing.

“Fine then.” Y/N thought to herself. “Save your ego. Can’t have anyone catching you look at me.”

She then blushed, realizing she was getting mad at him like he was her friend. They had barely ever interacted, why was she feeling and acting this way?

Y/N met Asher outside of the school, in the student parking lot. He was already in the car, obviously annoyed that his little sister had taken so long.

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry!” she babbled apologies as she clambered into the car and buckled up. Though she would never admit it, she tried to impress her brother and stay on his good side. He was in with the popular crowd at school, and she took every chance she got to look cool to him.

“Yeah, whatever. Listen, I heard what happened to you today.” Y/N’s face flushed red when he brought up the memory. “I know you had a bad day, so I’m gonna give you a deal. It’s a one time thing, though, okay?”

He turned to look at Y/N, and she nodded. 

“If you want, you can come to this party with me tonight. I’m hearing that some of the sophomores will be there, too, so it’s not like you’ll be alone. You wanna go?”

“Oh, yeah. That sounds like fun.”

“Okay. We’re leaving at 8:30. If mom or dad asks, we’re going to the movies with a few friends. I will not have my night ruined by some kid who can’t keep her mouth shut.”

His sister pursed her lips, showing that her lips were sealed. He put his key into the ignition and started it, driving back to the house.

Once they arrived from the ten minute drive, Y/N raced straight up to her room, taking no time in saying hello to the rest of her family. Really, though, it was only her mom, because her dad was at work and Tyson was still at school.

Y/N immediately texted her friends about the party.

*Text*

Y/N: Guysss!!!

L: Wat

Z: What is it??

Y/N: I’m going to a party 2nite!

M: R u serious? How?

Y/N: Asher

L: Ah, that makes more sense

Z: What r u gonna wear?

Y/N: idk

M: Well, when r u leaving?

Y/N: 8:30, why?

L: IT’S 3:30 U ONLY HAVE 5 HOURS TO DECIDE WHAT TO WEAR

Z: R U INSANE HURRY

M: U guys r so overdramatic

Y/N: Agreed. Will text when I have perfect outfit.

*End*

Y/N set her phone gently on the bed before turning it off, going over to her dresser and rooting through it to find the perfect combination of an outfit.

She pulled out various dresses, skirts, pants, and shirts, sifting through each one carefully and pairing together different items that may look good together. Y/N tried on each option before settling on the perfect ensemble, one that was casual but cool at the same time. “Coolsual”, she called it.

Y/N flopped onto her bed and flipped open her laptop, going to YouTube to entertain her for a few hours before she showed her friends what she’d be wearing. 

Eventually, time passed (though Y/N would admit quite slowly because of how excited she was to go to this party)

She threw on her outfit, a skin-tight black off-the-shoulder top that adorned long sleeves, paired with a pretty black and white plaid skirt with a small chain hanging off the hip and connecting to one of the belt loops. Y/N also had on knee-high black socks, and finished off with a slight coat of make-up.

The girl stood in the mirror, snapping a picture before sending it to her awaiting girlfriends, who responded with “omg!”s and “love it!”s.

Y/N smiled at her phone, knowing they would’ve said the same thing if she staples herself in a trash bag, even if she knew they were lying. 

“Are you coming or not?” Asher yelled from the bottom of the stairs up to her room. Y/N hadn’t realized the time and yelled back in response, grabbing her purse and heading downstairs.

She pulled on some quick tennis shoes, not wanting to be bothered with the burden of having heels on, even if they weren’t that tall.

“Finally, you slowpoke, I texted you only a million times!” her older brother complained.

“Girls take longer!” she complained, but the both of them knew that she was just lazy in getting ready.

Asher chuckled and shook his head at the younger girl. “Whatever. Let’s go.”

They started out the door and into the driveway, entering the car. The senior put his key into the ignition and they drove the 5 minutes in silence to his friend’s house.

Once they arrived, Y/N noticed that there were so many more people than anticipated. She could already tell that this wasn’t going to be as fun as she expected, and she recognized no one out on the lawn.

“Whatever.” Y/N thought to herself. “I’ll just hang out by the cooler the entire time. No big deal.”

But she was lying to herself, and she knew it. It was a big deal, seeing as she was never one to be so involved with large crowds of people. She had her group of friends, and that was all she needed. Nevertheless, she snapped out of her thoughts and brought herself to push open the car door. 

The minute they stepped out of the vehicle, Asher was swooped away by his friends, no surprise there. Y/N, left to fend for herself, went to the food. It was in the corner by some chairs anyways, so it was a nicer place to be alone rather than out in the sea of bodies that were dancing, some quite inappropriately, she may add.

Suddenly, the girl felt someone sit next to her. Y/N turned her head to find Amber, a girl that she sometimes talked to in her math class. They were getting to know each other pretty well, finding things in common when they had the time.

“Hi.” the brunette spoke, a bit quietly. It could’ve just been the loud music, but Amber was a known introvert, so it was a surprise to see her in a place like this.

“Hey. What are you doing here? I wouldn’t expect to see you at a party, no offence.” Y/N responded.

“None taken, and I could say the same for you. My friend Samantha dragged me here. I don’t know why though, because she knows I don’t go to these things.”

“Ah. My brother offered to take me, since I had a pretty bad day, but I realize it’s definitely not my scene.”

Amber hummed in response, and the two girls people-watched for a few minutes, until Y/N noticed a certain someone in the crowd.

Ethan Dolan.

He stood next to his twin, Grayson, talking animatedly to a few of his friends. Y/N hadn’t noticed she was staring until Amber poked at her side for the second time.

“Y/N! Earth to Y/N!” she called, before noticing who she was looking at. “Ooh, you like him?”

“Yeah.” the girl called absentmindedly, unaware that Amber had even asked a question, let alone what the topic was.

Amber squealed. “Oh my god! It’s gonna be hard to get to him, though, he practically has a line of girls waiting for him.”

“What?” Y/N turned to Amber. “Please explain, I have no idea what you just said.”

As Amber talked to the sophomore next to her, unbeknown that she was being watched.

From across the room, Ethan was looking directly at her, watching as she talked to a girl that was probably in the grade, but never bothered to learn who she was.

Y/N and Ethan had only ever crossed paths a few times, seeing as she was obviously less popular than he. But after today, he felt butterflies dashing around in his stomach, and he wasn’t sure if it was from embarrassment or having a crush.

Little did he know, Y/N felt the same way.

Whatever the feeling, the muscular boy decided to suck it up and go talk to her. On the other side of the room, Y/N was oblivious to his attempts to get her attention.

After a few minutes, her gaze eventually shifted to him, and Y/N grinned at Ethan when they made eye contact. He ended his conversation and sauntered over to the sitting girl.

“Hey.” he spoke, causing Y/N to blush a little bit. She couldn’t believe it, a popular kid, talking to her. Willingly.

“Hi.” she quietly spoke, afraid that she would mess something up. The two sophomores looked at each other for a minute, small grins on both of their faces.

“So,” Ethan broke the ice. “How are you doing after today? Y’know, with the whole cafeteria thing...”

Y/N silently thanked him for asking “I’m doing good. Unfortunately, my favorite sweatshirt was ruined, but it’s okay.”

“Oh, I’m sorry, I should’ve been watching where I was.”

“No, no, it’s my fault.”

The taller boy breathed out of his nose before speaking again. “So, see you around?”

“For sure.”

With that, Ethan left Y/N to go find his friends once more. What they didn’t know is that both of them felt the same feeling of butterflies invading their bodies, jittery and nervous.

Alex Kallio who?

[moonlight-chi77]

|| nct dream // Zhong Chenle // Chewing gum ||

Type: Fluff

Words: 1.361

Warnings: 'E-girl', exclusion

7am and you drew the pink blush on your cheeks and your nose, trying to not let it fall on your black in black Outfit, looking like the E-Girl you always wanted to. You know it scared the others but it was alright, you didn't even wanted anyone to know how your personality really was.

"Y/n breakfast!" your mother screamed friendly and you walked upstairs to the kitchen "Again?" she asked, tired of your strong make up and special outfits "I love you too Mom" you giggled as you sat down, waiting for your little brother and sister, which were twins and 4 years old now. "Good Morning my little sunshines" you smiled and patted both of their hands "Good Morning" they screamed full of life energy you didn't even had left.

The three of you started eating your breakfast before you stud up and packed your water bottle and placed it into your school bag, not eating anything in school but sometimes chewed a gum. "Bye Bye" you shouted, hearing your mom complaining as you closed the door laughing before walking to the train station and driving 20 minutes before getting in the bus for another 10 minutes and then taking the 5 minute walk to your school, you always liked the long way to your school even on the bad days.

"Morning" Seonghwa, your only true friend, said as you walked into the building "Hey, I have math, and you?" he shrugged his shoulders "Yeosang? What subject do we have now?" he asked his friend which always walked with you but never really talked "History" he mumbled and walked to Hongjoong and his other friends "Why does he always walks away? He really doesn't like me" you mumbled in return "Nah, he's just shy and you're intimidating" he laughed and walked away as well "Idiot" you said loudly, scaring some other kids causing you to roll your eyes and walk to class annoyed as always.

In class there were already some students, some annoying and some you actually would like to get close but as already noticed nobody liked you, nobody except Seonghwa who'll graduate soon and then you'll be completely alone. "May you sit down as well?" the teacher asked "May you shut up" you whispered, only a few classmates heard it but not the teacher, who only saw you walking to you place next to a random girl.

*Break*

You all were allowed to stay in all break, just how you did it all the time but the most would buy some food or drinks, the same did Chenle and his friends who came back just now, only like 10 people were in class, including them.

Chenle held some Chewing gums in his hand and everyone of them chewed one, you wanted one too, but as you searched in your bag you found nothing but an empty package "Can I have one?" you asked, kinda cold as you shore up your hands on his table looking directly in his eyes "Oh-ehm..here" he said and handed you the full package, you grabbed one as you rolled your eyes. "Thanks" were your words before you threw them to him, but he couldn't grab them so they hitted his face, making you look like a bully.

The few students looked at you kind of shocked even though they already thought that you were like that, of course you weren't but nobody believed that, no one but Seonghwa of course, who you text this situation. 'That's kinda funny lol' was his only response to that, you threw your phone into your bag making a loud noise before standing up and walking out of class, everyone looked scared as you walked next to them to the toilets.

You hated school, not people. That was everything. But everyone was so damn afraid that they wouldn't notice that, not even that you tried your best in everything. And this annoyed you even more than school, no one knew you but everyone hated you for nothing at all.

*Few days later*

Chenle and his friends were buying stuff in a near convince store once again and this time you were fully alone in class and had gums with you so you decided to lay one on his place, wanting to be friendly like you normally were.

His friends only came back when a few classmates already sat there, looking confused when they saw the gum on Chenle's place but he looked over to you, seeing your smile as he grabbed it and unpacked it. "Thanks" he mouthed for no one but you, his friends still were kinda confused but sat down on their places quickly as they saw you standing up "You kids really should stop being afraid over nothing" Chenle than said smiling at you, you laughed in return and laughed, making everyone shocked before you walked out of class to the restrooms.

*a few days later*

"Wait" Chenle screamed through the whole floor "Could you please at least try to be quiet?" you asked him with a friendly smile but he only shrugged his shoulders "Never tried it" he smiled before the both of you walked out "So we're friends now, or what?" you asked in a cold tone making him slightly scared "Yeah, I would like to know you better so I'm going home with you and stay there for a few hours" he said like it were normal. "You're unbelievable" you laughed before talking once again "But alright" you shrugged your shoulders "That really worked?" he asked kind of impressed "I mean I have no friends, excluding Seonghwa, so why should I be unfriendly? Also we're not in school anymore so my mood is pretty good" you smiled "You just hate school?" he asked shocked but you only nodded "Bruh I thought you wanted to kill everyone because you hate human beings" he laughed high pitched.

*after the long way home*

"I'm home Mom" you said loudly as you opened the door "Y/n" the twins screamed as they ran into your open arms "Hey my sunshines how was kindergarten today?" you asked them in a soft tone, still in the hug, they told you what they did before looking strangely to Chenle "That's a boy out of my class, don't be afraid he doesn't bite" you laughed so they hugged him while you got out of your shoes. "Mom? I'm in my room, a classmate is over, is that alright?" you asked as you kissed her forehead, standing on you tiptoes while she got down a little, making Chenle giggling "It's okay, I'm happy when you're not only with Seonghwa" she smiled making you roll your eyes "I'm not gonna stop meeting him" you showed her your tongue before dragging Chenle in your room "I'm gonna change" you said while getting things out of your closet "Just look around but don't open anything" you laughed before walking to the bathroom.

You came back with no make up and a soft pyjama, not caring what he would think about it but laughing as you saw him smiling widely at you.

"It's really late, I think he should stay here" you mom said at the dinner "Oh no, it's alright" he said immediately "Nah, it's better like that. I'll give you clothes of my older brother and we can talk for another 4 hours" you smiled at him, already having the feeling that you were best friends. "Okay" he gave in smiling at you too, even holding your hand under the table and not that you would ever say that out loud but your crush on him only grew bigger.

*Now*

You smiled as you thought about 'the old times' when you sat on Chenle's lap "Want one?" he asked as he held Chewing Gums in his hand "Of course" you smiled and took one, being happy that you now were best friends. Seonghwa already left the school so Chenle now were your only friend, his friends still tried to run away from you but you got the feeling that all of you will get close soon, so you were more than happy.

[the-hilda-librarians-wife]

The Mistakes We Made - Chapter Three

Summary:When her high school girlfriend comes back to town after two years with a baby and a terrible story she won’t tell, the Librarian has to deal with the feelings she had worked so hard to keep at bay.

notes: Uhhh so the notes I wrote are kinda importanta, but they’re too long, so if you really want to read them you can read it at ao3 lol. Hope you enjoy this chapter!

Read it on ao3: (chpt1) (chpt2) (chpt3)

The bell rang loudly, interrupting Mrs. Kavindi’s speech about neoclassicist poetry. The woman tried to keep her students’ attention, but it was no use, as the teens were already putting their stuff away in their backpacks. Only a pair of grey eyes followed her hand as she wrote on the board, rapidly taking note of everything. Eventually, she sighed and let her hand drop to her side.

“Alright, everyone. You’re free to go.”

There were loud noises of chairs dragging on the floor and the chatter of the students as they hurriedly left the Literature classroom, eager to begin their weekend. The girl, however, took her time putting her pen in her pencil case, and her pencil case in her backpack. She checked her notes one more time, certifying herself that she had written in legible handwriting before she was out of the classroom and couldn’t ask the teacher any more questions.

She got up from the chair and put her backpack on her back, walking up to the teacher who had sat down on the table and was watching the students leave. Mrs. Kavindi raised her eyes when she realized the girl had gotten closer, and gave her a simile.

“Can we expect you this evening, Maven?”

The girl nodded. “I still have some topics to study for next month’s finals, but I wouldn’t miss it for the world.”

Kavindi’s smile widened as she watched her favorite student leave. The girl was a bit of an outcast, for sure, but by her experience, all the best people were.

_#_#_#_

Johanna bit back a groan when the boy came closer. His smug grin was infuriating, and it didn’t help matters when he leaned on his shoulder against the locker next to her.

“I don’t want to talk to you, Torrin.” She said as she put her math notebook back in its place. His blue hair fell over his face when he laughed.

“Why not?”

Johanna closed her locker’s door with more strength than necessary. “Because you’re a jerk.”

“Is this about about Dick? Is this why you’re angry?” He said the words in a mocking voice, making Johanna wonder what would be the penalty if she got caught burying a corpse. Maybe Maven would be up for it too and they wouldn’t get caught. It sounded like a good plan.

“What happened between me and your friend is our business. Not yours.” Johanna sighed. She was waiting for Torrin to answer when she sighted a spot of black coming towards her. Her mouth opened into a smile, her eyes moving from his strong face to beatiful, wise eyes, coming closer and closer, with a smile answering her own.

When Torrin realized he had lost Johanna’s attention, it was too late. Maven was already behind him, pulling his head back by grabbing a handful of his hair. He gasped at the feeling, though she hadn’t grasped quite hard enough to make him feel any pain.

“I believe you are unwanted here, Aven.” She stated coldly. She let his hair go, but not without taking a few strands with her. The boy turned to her, wide eyed with fright but feigning anger.

“What the hell is wrong with you?!”

“Remember what you called my mother last month, when you and your gang threw eggs at our house?” She ignored him as she tied one of the strands around the others, making a little bundle. “You called her a witch. And you weren’t wrong.”

She put the bundle on her jacket pocket and looked at him in the eyes. “So tell me, Aven. What kind of thing do you think a witch can do with a few pieces of your ridiculous blue hair?”

Torrin cursed under his breath and left, taking long strides and making sure to bump on Maven’s shoulder hard enough to hurt. But the raven haired girl didn’t care. All she could focus on was her friend trying and failing to contain her fit of giggles.

“Your mother wouldn’t actually curse him, right?” Johanna asked once she had gotten a hold of her laughter.

“Well, she could. But she won’t because he’s just a stupid teen. It would be a waste of spell ingredients.” Maven looked at ground. She wasn’t ashamed of her mother’s religion, nor was she that she too had chosen to follow Wicca, but Johanna’s parents were extremely Christian and she didn’t like to see the involuntary judgement in Johanna’s eyes whenever she talked about her faith.

“Are you ready to go?” Maven asked right after. Johanna had already put everything she would need for the weekend in her backpack and it seemed useless to just stand there looking at each other.

“Oh. Yes, I am. There’s something I need to talk to you about.”

She sounded sad, Maven realized. That was unusual. Her Anna was always so full of happiness that whenever her mood changed it was easy to notice, at least for her.

They were silent as they finished crossing the school’s corridor and its front door. When they were finally outside, with the early autumn wind messing with their hair and the leaves on the trees by the sidewalk, she finally spoke.

“I’m sorry I didn’t talk to you about this when you asked at lunch. I didn’t feel like badmouthing someone then. But after that, I’ve no problem whatsoever with doing it.”

Oh, this is going to be good ,she thought but instead said “Torrin Aven is never good knews. Truly, only he is able to get you this upset.”

“You aren’t going to believe this, Maven! So, I had scheduled to help Richard study, correct?”

“I still don’t know why you accepted that, but yes, correct.”

“It turns out he didn’t want a hand with geometry! He was trying to trick me into going on a date with him!” She threw her hands up in frustration. “Who does that?!”

Maven snorted. “Stupid, obnoxious people, that’s who.”

Johanna sighed deeply, and looked both ways before both of them crossed the street to her block. “Honestly, I’ve never met one dateable boy. I wonder it I’m the problem, or if they are.”

She stopped in front of her house, turning to look at Maven before they bid goodbye. “You know, maybe I’m meant to be alone”, she said sadly. Maven’s eyes widened, and her mouth was slightly open with confusion.

“That’s not true!” The girl protested. “I mean, if you don’t want to be with anyone, that’s okay, but if you want a relationship, I doubt that you’ll stay much longer without one, Anna.”

“What makes you think so?”

“You’re a naturally loving person, for one. You’ve always been able to give your heart completely to the people you love.” She shrugged. “And you’re smart. And beautiful. And extremely kind. Anyone would be happy to have you. Now you just need to find someone who you think deserves you.”

Her long brown hair cascaded down her shoulder when she cocked her head. “You’re just saying this to make me feel better about being picky with boys.” She laughed nervously.

Maven sighed and blushed. Trying to flirt with a girl who grew up in a conservative household was a challenge indeed. But she had been doing it for five years and she wasn’t about to give up on her clueless Anna now. “I’m really not, though.”

She was rewarded with a hug and a peck on the cheek. “Thanks, Maven. You’re the best friend I could wish for.” She drew back and began heading for the door. “Same time same place?” Johanna asked as she looked for the keys in her backpack.

“Yup.”

With a smile, Johanna entered her house and closed the door again. A ghost of a smile passed through Maven’s lips. Though she had been wanting to be something more to Johanna ever since they were thirteen, being her best friend was already enough. It was more than an “antisocial creep”, as she was called in school, like her deserved. Johanna could be friends with anyone. With the jocks, the nerds, the popular people, the drama kids and the band kids. But she chose to stick with the graveyard keeper’s daughter, and she couldn’t be more grateful.

And yet, she was too selfish to stop wanting more.

_#_#_#_

“Oh, it seems someone else needs to go to her bedroom too.” Johanna said sweetly as she picked her baby up again. “Could you take the stroller to our room? I’ll try to calm her down a bit.”

“Oh, sure.” Maven quickly put her cup on the sink counter and went for the stroller, taking it through the narrow corridor beside the staircase that led to her mother’s old bedroom. She pushed on the door with her back, placing the stroller between the bed and the window.

She hoped Hilda didn’t mind having a cemetery for a view.

Johanna came in too not a moment later, singing her baby a lullaby that Maven was almost sure she recognized from somewhere, though she had no idea where. Her mother had never sung her lullabies, always going for stories to calm her down instead.

“Is she going to sleep in the stroller?”

Johanna sighed. “I don’t think I have another option. I left in a hurry, so I didn’t have time to disassemble her crib and bring it along.”

Maven bit her lip. What could have happened that made them practically run out of there? She swore that if in the end it turned out Aven had threatened them physically, there would be very few places that man would be able to hide in. She was already hated in town for being an outcast, so why not add murder to the list?

“Well, I think I have a smaller comforter stored somewhere. Do you want it?” She asked, wanting to help even if a little with their situation.

“No, I brought her blanket, but thank you.” Johanna gave her a really tired smile. “Do you have any children’s books, though? I didn’t bring hers, and she really likes the colours.”

Maven nodded. “I’ll be back in a second.”

_#_#_#_

It had been a fairly calm meeting, Maven mused as she put her sweater back on. The book club was rarely this way. Just in the last few months, she had already gotten into arguments about A Midsummer Night’s Dream and The Iliad, but it seemed like everyone had similar opinions this time, or at least no one had wanted to defend Alice when the majority of the participants had accused her of being a spoiled little girl who didn’t respect Wonderland’s traditions, just judging them all as “madness”.

She had been so concentrated on checking that everything she had brought was still in her simple brown leather purse that she barely realized that she was being spoken to. She raised her head and saw that the librarian, Mr. Kavindi, was talking to her.

“I’m sorry, sir, what was that?” She asked politely and he chuckled.

“I asked what are your plans for after school, little one.” Mr. Kavindi was a sweet man, with graying red hair and round glasses. He was wearing a blue sweater that was way too big for him. All his sweaters were like that, and she supposed it was because his wife knitted all of them for him.

“Oh yes, dear. I wanted to talk to you about this.” Said wife, Mrs. Kavindi, walked up to them and put her hand on his shoulder. Her wild dark brown hair framed her face, and combined with her green coat it made her look like a forest spirit. “Go on, Maven. I think he may be able to help.”

Maven looked from her teacher to the librarian. She really didn’t know what he could possibly do for her. The only help she needed was financial, and it was highly unlikely that a librarian had a lot of money to spare.

“I would like to study English, and then major in Library Science.” She said simply.

His eyes lit up and his usually kind face showed even more happiness. “Oh, so you want to steal my job, young lady?”

Maven put the purse’s strap on her shoulder and got up from the armchair she usually sat on, one with dark wood and magenta cushioning. She looked around the room that they used for their weekly meetings, one of the most secluded areas of the library, breathing in the calming smell of old parchment and ink that emanated from the hundreds of books piled upon shelves on the walls. Yes. Yes, she wanted to.

“You needn’t worry, sir. My mother doesn’t have enough money to pay for my college, and I really don’t think it would be wise to get in debt.” She’d probably just stay in Trollberg and learn her mother’s job. She was already quite familiar with it, and it wasn’t as if there was a queue of people wanting to be the knew cemetery keeper. In fact, she didn’t think there was a single soul that wanted it.

Mr. Kavindi frowned and seemed to deflate. His wife, on the other hand, kept pressing on. “And where would you study, if you had the money?”

She didn’t know why her teacher was asking this - she already knew. Maven had talked to her about her plans and why they wouldn’t work. But her teacher was a smart and helpful woman. It wouldn’t hurt to say again.

“In Ericsonberg University. It’s not a very long drive to make every day, or I could go by train and it would be even faster. Also, my best friend has already sent in her application and is probably going to study there.” Trollberg was a small town. It had very few options of higher education, and only a few courses were offered, most of them related to the forest and agriculture. Everyone else had to move away or choose a college in a nearby city.

“That is wonderful!” Mr. Kavindi chirped, looking like himself again. “I can help, then. I have a very close relationship with the dean!”

Maven made herself stand up straighter and looked at him with more attention. “Really?”

“Yes! We studied English in Oslo together! Why, Erica always told me you were such a great student, I’m sure I can work something out with him.”

Maven wasn’t the sentimental type, she really was not. But in that moment she felt such gratitude that a few tears nearly leaked from her eyes. Nearly.

“Would you do that?” She asked, just to be certain, just to check. It wasn’t offer something this good happened to her.

The librarian’s eyes softened, and he and his wife leaned their heads against one another’s. It was weird, to see those two people so similar and so in love. It was like they had been made for one another. It was cute. “Of course, little one. It isn’t often that we get a bright and curious mind like yours in a small town like this one. It would be a shame not to nurture it.”

Maven inhaled deeply with emotion. “Is there anything I can do to thank you?”

Mrs. Kavindi let go of her husband put both hands upon Maven’s shoulders. “You are already hard working and focused. I know we needn’t ask you that. But you’re lonely. So in return, I ask you to not get even more so. Keep that friend of yours around. Don’t let the rhythm of college pull you two apart, okay?”

She had to blink back a few tears at that. “Thank you. So much.”

Husband and wife shared a look, and before she knew, Maven was engulfed in a bone crushing hug. “We’re glad to be of help, young lady.” He said when he pulled back. “I’ll let you know when I hear back from the dean.”

“Now run along.” Her teacher said. “You have finals to study for.”

Maven smiled to them and headed to the door. She had something else to do, actually.

_#_#_#_

It turned out that her mother had kept all her favorite books from when she was a kid in a single box in their cramped little attic. After scaring a spider into moving away from the box, Maven dug in and grabbed the three first books she saw, walking away quickly and promising to come back soon with cleaning apparel.

The spiders she could live with, but a bunch of perfectly good books gathering dust crossed a line.

When she came back down, Hilda wasn’t crying anymore, but was clearly agitated in her mother’s arms. She approached Johanna very quietly. She didn’t know much about babies, so she wasn’t really sure if any noise could make matters worse or not. Even though Johanna’s eyes were focused on Hilda’s forehead, her gaze was so glassy that Maven doubted that she was actually seeing anything.

“Hey, I found them.” She placed the book by Johanna’s side on the bed. She desperately wanted to ask if she was okay, but she didn’t think she’d get an honest answer.

Johanna’s gaze cleared and she looked at the items before her. “Oh. Thank you, Maven.”

“Not for that.”

It felt like silence stretched for a long time after that, but realistically Maven knew it had only been a few seconds.

“So. I, uh, I’ll just read one of them for her and then sleep myself. Can I do anything for you?”

“No, it’s okay.” Maven rubbed at her eyes. Just looking at Johanna was making her tired. “Just get some rest. You look like a zombie.”

Johanna lifted her eyebrows. “Well, aren’t you a flatterer?” She asked mockingly.

“I speak only truths.” She said as she headed to the door. You look beautiful to me anyway. That truth she didn’t tell.

Johanna shook her head and got up from the edge of the bed. Maven’s heart felt entirely too tight as she watched from the doorway Johanna kiss her child goodnight before gently lowering her down to the stroller and tucking the blanket around her. The woman really had “mother” written all over her. The image of the two of them, so perfect and loving even through pain and exhaustion, was too much to bear, and Maven had to avert her eyes.

When Johanna turned to get one of the books to read to her baby, Maven was already at the bottom of the staircase.

_#_#_#_

Johanna fidgeted nervously with the sleeves of her jacket as she looked out of one of the Poet’s Retreat windows. Ever since she had arrived home that afternoon, she’d felt as if butterflies had taken flight in her belly. She didn’t think she’d ever been so nervous.

She had been stalling that realization for as long as she could, pushing the thought away whenever it popped in her mind, but honestly, she’d be a fool to ignore Maven’s feelings towards her after she’d all but declared her love, and even a bigger one if she denied her own feelings any longer when she had felt like she was melting inside when she had kissed her friend’s cheek.

She’d had a most unproductive afternoon, after that. She’d had been dealing with the thought of liking girls for some time now, so guilt wasn’t really a problem, especially since she wasn’t as religious as her parents, anyway. But the worry of not being able to share that part of herself with the people that had raised her had kept her thoughts away from her studies.

At least she knew there was a name for what she felt, for liking boys and girls. It kept at bay the feeling of being an alien in a small minded town. It was comforting. But it still didn’t hold back the shock that was admitting that she was in love with her best friend, regardless of gender.

When the clock in the wall near the counter marked five in the afternoon and Maven still hadn’t arrived, Johanna began thinking something was off, which didn’t help her matters when she was already trembling with nervousness. She was always so punctual, arriving right after her book club ending, precisely at five to five. And she wouldn’t have just forgotten it either. They’d had this appointment ever since they first went to the Poet’s Retreat together: 5 p.m. every Tuesday and Friday. Even if they didn’t have the money or didn’t feel like ordering anything, they’d go in and talk. About their days, their worries, their parents, their studies, or even about dumb things they saw in the internet. They never missed it unless there was something very important they needed to do, or if one of them was sick, in which case they’d visit each other in their houses in the time they were supposed to be there. It was their tradition, their thing. Maven wouldn’t miss their eight year old tradition unless something had happened.

Johanna was just going to call her when the bell that hung above the cafe’s door jingled and she turned to see who was it, relieved as she watched Maven come in. She looked radiant with happiness, and she couldn’t wait to find out what got her like this.

Without breaking eye contact with Johanna, Maven walked closer with a shy smile, while her friend grinned at her. She pulled her usual chair back and sat down, chewing on her bottom lip before she whispered.

“You won’t believe what happened!”

“What did?” Johanna asked as she tried her best not to get distracted by said lip.

“Mr. Kavindi says he knows Ericsonberg English College’s dean. He will try to get me in!”

Johanna’s jaw dropped. For more than an year now, she’d been worrying about what would happen to Maven when High School was over, knowing very well her widow mother couldn’t really afford an expensive college like those of the cities nearby, nor could she pay for a place for Maven to live at in the further away cities that offered cheaper education. So this was practically a blessing that fell down from the skies.

“Are you serious? How?”

“I still don’t know exactly.” Maven said, trying to get the buttons of her coat undone. “Most likely they’ll give me some tough exam or something. But I’ll make it.” She got all of them out of their holes and lifted her head to look at her friend. “I have to.”

Johanna reached out and grabbed her hand “Yes, you will. And if you need help, you can count on me.” She said, squeezing it slightly.

Maven smiled and intertwined their fingers upon the table, making Johanna’s heart skip a few beats. She swore that that coy smile would kill her one day. “Thank you, Anna. I feel like coffee”, she said suddenly. “Will you join me?”

She didn’t quite think that coffee was the best option for her already on edge nerves, but it was a special occasion. It called for celebratory coffee.

“Sure.”

Maven got up, then, and told their order to the barista who already knew them by name. She came back a few minutes later, handing her a cup with a lot of cream.

“I forgot to give you the money!” She exclaimed after taking a sip of the heavily sweetened down drink.

“That’s okay. I did a cleaning job for my cousin a few days ago, this one’s on me.”

Half an hour passed comfortably. Maven told her of how the library’s book club went, and Johanna took the chance to discuss a book she was reading. She felt she could talk to her friend for hours; Maven was so intelligent and well read, it was nearly impossible to get bored when she was near. But their cups were long since empty, and it was time to go. However, there were still things Johanna needed to say.

“Do you want to take a walk in the park? It’s going to be a beautiful sunset by the looks of it.”

Maven bit her lip. She really needed to go home to study, but that really was an offer she couldn’t refuse. So she nodded and they got up, and walked to a little known park near Johanna’s place, one that had many flowers growing wildly and randomly due to lack of attention from the city hall, and even had a small fountain, though cracked in a few places and waterless.

“How does Mr. Kavindi know Ericsonberg’s dean?”, Johanna asked eventually, when they stopped to admire a few celosia flowers. Maven stretched her memory.

“They went to college in Oslo together, if I remember correctly.”

Johanna frowned. “The librarian went to Oslo? But that’s an amazing college! How come he ended up working in a little town? He sounds like he’s from the north, so he can’t have family here!”

That made sense, Maven though. With a good graduation and his natural talent, Mr. Kavindi could probably get a job in a way better place. Sure, Trollberg’s library was gigantic, but that was mainly due to the efforts of one of the first mayors in its history, who had hoped that the town would grow to be one of intellectuals. Maven nearly pitied him.

“Mrs. Kavindi said once that they had met when they were in college and she took a trip to Oslo”, Maven remembered, lifting her eyes to the orange sky on top of them. “And her family is from here. So he probably came to live here because of her.”

“Oh.” Johanna breathed. If that was the case, it was probably one of the most romantic acts she had heard of outside her books. “That must have been quite a sacrifice.”

“Not really” Maven shrugged. “It must have payed off. When you love someone, and they love you, you do whatever it takes to be with them, don’t you?”

Out of the corner of her eye, Johanna realized that Maven had stopped looking at the sky, and was now looking at her. She felt her heart accelerate, beating madly against her ribcage as she faced her friend back.

There were so many things that needed to be discussed. Johanna knew that ideally, she should probably talk about her feelings and the things she had found out first. But Maven was looking at her with so much affection in her beautiful grey eyes, and her short dark hair was just a little bit messy because of the wind, and the golden light of the sunset was throwing golden shadows on her angular face, and honestly, Johanna was just human.

So she closed her eyes and leaned in.

And not after a moment later, Maven leaned in too.

The raven haired girl exhaled heavily. She had been deathly afraid of having mistaken her friend’s intentions, but found instant relief when Johanna pressed her lips against her own. Many thoughts filled her mind, of love and victory and confusion, but she pushed them all aside: she could deal with them later. When she was alone in her room, and Johanna wasn’t kissing her.

Maven took Johanna’s bottom lip between hers, and sighed again at their taste of sweet coffee and honey, being answered with a similar sigh from her love. They hadn’t had any honey at the cafe. She wondered if her lips always tasted like that somehow.

Oh, how she wanted to find out the answer for that question.

She wished she could stay there forever, in that beautiful place with untamed flowers, in that perfect moment of golden light, that little natural miracle that was when day met night. But too soon, they pulled away.

And Maven didn’t “grin”. For most of the town, save her family and Johanna, she didn’t even smile. But in that moment, she was grinning like an idiot. Like the lovesick idiot she had become.

“ I, uh-“ Johanna began, blushing strongly but also with a gigantic smile on her face. “I’m sorry it took so long for me to get the hint. A- about you and about myself too.”

Gods, she looked so cute it was nearly impossible to gather any rational thinking, Maven thought. “Do… do you?” She asked, only realizing that she hadn’t asked a complete question when Johanna cocked her head in confusion. “L-like me, I mean.”

She cursed herself for stuttering, but stopped bothering when Johanna’s face opened up in a smile again. “Yes, I do. Very much.”

And after that, when they didn’t know what to say, they kissed again. And again. And even as she walked home alone later, the stars and the moon her only companions, Maven began thinking that maybe, just maybe, that beautiful dusk could last forever.

_#_#_#_

The Librarian shut the door behind her and all but threw herself on the grey duvet of her bed, feeling the hard mattress against her back. She was downright exhausted. For two years, she had made herself accept the fact that she would never see Johanna again, she had locked her feelings for her where she thought it was safe to say that they wouldn’t haunt her again, and yet there she was. Back in her town, back in her house, back in her damn heart.

She slowly got up from the bed, walking to her windowsill seat and sitting down. Johanna had always had such light around herself that Maven sometimes felt as if she needed to squeeze her eyes to look at her directly. She just radiated warmth that she had craved so deeply. But now that there was a baby, she all but glew whenever it was near. She had been through so much, had gotten her heart broken, and it was clear on her eyes how much she had suffered, but it was also clear that her ability to love had, if anything, multiplied.

Maven drew her legs up to her chest and looked at the waning moon, leaning her head against the bedroom window and catching her own eyes in the reflection. Johanna was so bright and comforting and nutouring, and she was cold and lonely and eerie.

So it didn’t matter that she was back. It didn’t matter that she was staying at her house. It didn’t matter that her heart sang whenever she looked at Johanna and her baby. After all, she told herself as she drew her eyes away from the moon and to its glow on her pale hands, Sun and Moon could never be lovers. The day could never be with the night.

Dusk was just a fleeting moment. Eventually, darkness always came.

[peterstanslizzie]

Re-watching Lizzie Mcguire: Episode 1.28 (Lizzie and Kate’s Excellent Adventure)

I wish we got to see more of this unexpected friendship

- We find out that Lizzie has the flu and had to miss a day of school. Gordo and Miranda greets Lizzie in her room with a stack full of books for her homework. It’s middle school, not college; That’s too many books.

I feel like I’ve seen this pic everywhere

- Lizzie asks her friends about what she’d miss in Mrs. Stebel’s Social Studies class and they give each other a strange look. Their teacher instructed the class to work in pairs to do a book report on a country and its native dish. Since Lizzie was absent, Gordo and Miranda naturally paired up, leaving Lizzie out of the picture.

- Well, it turns out that Lizzie is paired with her frenemy Kate Sanders, who was also absent from school. And as you can guess, Lizzie did not take to this news too well:

Let it all out girl...just let it all out

We get it; Lizzie and Kate don’t like each other. What’s new?

- The next morning, Lizzie is dreading going back to school since she’s forced to work with Kate and even considers calling in sick for an extra day. Her mom, Jo already knows about the whole Kate Sanders situation because Kate’s mom called in last night. Did Kate’s mom ever appeared on the show? I can’t recall. 

- Anyways, Jo insists that Lizzie should suck it up and deal with Kate being her project partner. On top of that, Matt’s adding fuel to the already raging fire by throwing his two-cents into the discussion. I’m now back to being annoyed with him after somewhat liking him last episode. 

- In school, Lizzie is complaining about the country that was assigned to her, Latvia and how the signature over there is jellied meat, which is called Aspic (after doing a quick Google search). 

- Kate and her crew walk up to Lizzie and Kate establishes some ground rules with Lizzie i.e. spending as little time together as possible, not being seen in public and not making jellied meat. Lizzie accepts her conditions and they also agree to meet at Lizzie’s house after school. 

It all seems like it’s going to work out but Lizzie still needs to let some steam out

Kate and Lizzie Working Together

- That evening after school, Lizzie is on the phone with Miranda, who’s with Gordo to work on their project on Mexico. 

Well, it’s mostly Gordo doing the ground work. Miranda’s more focused on jumping...

- The doorbell of Lizzie’s house rings and it’s probably Kate outside. Lizzie is still mad at Miranda for not covering for her. What does she want for Miranda to do exactly? If Kate’s the only other person absent in class, it makes sense for the two absent students to get paired. And if Lizzie and Miranda pair up, Gordo wouldn’t have anyone but Kate to partner with. 

- Kate’s in the kitchen talking to Jo and they’re awkwardly trying to make small talk. As soon as Lizzie steps into the kitchen, Jo quickly scurries on out of there because it seems like she doesn’t like Kate either lol. 

This stare-down between the two of them is even more awkward

- But things take a turn when they both agree that their friends are lousy for not picking them as their partner for the project. And it’s so cute how they laughed at the same time. As time went on, they seem to be getting along well due to being on the same page when it comes to Latvian food. 

Do y’all see this interaction? It’s so rare; It’s like watching a dog walk on its hind legs (I had to include a Mean Girls reference)

- Even Jo notices them getting along like old times. But as soon as Kate realises this, she quickly excuses herself and they say bye to each other awkwardly. I wish they could go back to being good friends because I don’t like the idea that popular kids can’t be friends with the non-popular kids. I mean, I don’t think they even got to that place after the Lizzie Mcguire Movie. 

A Broken Friendship

- The next morning, Miranda and Gordo ask Lizzie how things went with Kate to which she tells them it was alright. Not only that, she tells them that she and Kate are going to work together after school at the Digital Bean even though one of Kate’s earlier demands is that they are not to be seen in public together.

- At the Digital Bean, Lizzie and Kate are researching on what their dish should be and they decide to make Alexandertorte, which is a pastry dessert that has raspberry jam inside. 

Nice contrast

- Gordo and Miranda followed by Claire and her other crew members then stop by to throw shade at Kate and Lizzie respectively. But Claire was way worse than Lizzie’s friends; She even bragged about being able to work with Ethan over Kate. 

- They then start prepping in Lizzie’s kitchen to make their torte dish. Things start a little rocky at first but when they start talking about old memories from the time they were best friends, they begin to open up to each other again. Basically, they were talking about Kate’s 9th Birthday party and how Kate really loved a Baby Spice shirt that was given to her by Lizzie and she couldn’t wait to try it on. It’s kinda sad that they used to be that close. 

- All of a sudden, Matt runs into the kitchen with his blindfolds on and bumps into Kate who was carrying an egg carton; This, of course causes the eggs to drop to the ground. But it’s all okay because luckily, it was only a few eggs. 

The Queens of Falling

- This is when it gets kind of juicy; They finally talk about the reason why they’re suddenly not friends anymore. Before this, we were told that it’s because Kate developed really quickly and got a bra, which made her popular. I guess that’s still true but it’s also because she went away to camp and there, she had made new friends, whom might or might not have influenced her to treat her old friends badly. 

I got so many feels from this moment. Like I’ve said before, I just love the way they smile at each other; It’s so endearing. 

Possibilities

Look at them, working together as one and everything

- Next, we see them giving their report on Latvia in front of the class and they did a great job. After completing their presentation, their friends come over to throw unnecessary shade again and basically act as if Lizzie and Kate did not get along fine when they clearly did. 

- I think this is the moment where I really questioned ‘What Would Happen’ if the writers had decided to change the outcome of this episode since Lizzie and Kate went back to hating on each other just to please their friends. I actually envisioned the other alternative to be Lizzie and Kate standing up to their friends and basically letting them know the truth, which is they are actually back to being friends. But that’s not the case with what happened in this episode but still, I think the other possibility I mentioned could be a really powerful moment for this show. 

BUT we did get this moment, which tells the audience that Kate and Lizzie actually like each other deep down inside. It’s just that with the way middle school and its social groups are set up, it doesn’t allow them to publicly be friends. Well, who cares? But unfortunately, that’s just how school is; It’s full of petty drama.

B-Plot: Matt’s Psychic Y’all *Rolls Eyes

- In Matt’s school (we finally see him in school after spending so many episodes away from the place), he and his friend, Oscar are having lunch together and Matt is able to predict that their substitute Math teacher has on big red clown shoes before they even saw her. Matt concludes that he is psychic. And here I go, going back to not caring about Matt’s storyline again lol. 

- They set up a ‘Psychic Readings’ booth in the backyard and Matt gives predictions to three different kids, which seem vague and ludicrous at first but it turns out that all his predictions came true:

The predictions are as follows: Buying an expensive gift, getting a haircut and going on a long trip

- Similar to majority of Matt’s storylines, his one-off interests, which in this case is his psychic ability starts getting out of hand as he now thinks he is able to predict every single event, regardless of how insignificant it may be. Jo doesn’t buy it for one second but his dad sure does as he asks him to predict the next day’s lottery numbers. 

- Matt even predicted that Jo was going to send him to his room and later on, she would try to convince Sam that he’s not psychic. That was actually kind of cool but I guess it’s because he knows his parents very well. 

- Jo is very adamant on proving to both Matt and Sam that Matt isn’t really psychic and administers a test to help with that. And look, Matt answers the question correctly! If Jo is going out of her way to do all of that, I have to think that she low-key thinks that Matt is psychic, no? 

- Anyways, his antics finally end once he randomly realises he cannot read other people’s minds anymore. Oh well, too bad...goodbye.

Overall Thoughts

- This is easily one of my favourite episodes of the entire series. We finally get to see something fresh and new that we’ve never seen before on this show and that is Lizzie and Kate getting along as friends. 

- In Kate’s earliest appearance on this show, she was introduced as the mean, popular girl who was actually Lizzie’s best friend in elementary school up until she became popular. Since then, their old friendship wasn’t really touched upon at all till now. I love how they gave us a deep insight into their past memories as childhood friends and how she, Lizzie and Miranda were really close with one another back then. 

- This episode alone really makes me hope that Ashlie Brillault (the actress who plays Kate) will consider coming back to guest star in the Lizzie Mcguire revival series next year but I highly doubt it since she’s now an attorney. But honestly, I’d be okay if they mention to us that Lizzie and Kate are still friends in adulthood; That would make me pretty satisfied with Kate’s overall story arc. 

[rambling-at-midnight]

Pick Your Battles: Epilogue

Request: I loved Pick Your Battles! Can you do a small oneshot follow up of Five and Spartan Reader going to school?

I know you said small, anon, but I really love this universe and I had to resolve the unresolved question at the end of the story. So… have this 4603-word fic. I hope you aren’t too disappointed lol.

Pairing: Five x Reader

“That is not right,” you complain for the thirtieth time in as many minutes. Five’s gotten a bit tired of it, really. “You don’t—nobody actually believes Caesar was stabbed, right? He was poisoned! I was there!”

“Really?” Five asks, fascinated. “Were you the poisoner?”

“No, I was protecting the poisoner,” you respond, scowling at the worksheet the teacher gave the class. “These are all wrong! Does anyone bother to consider if historians are lying because they’re ashamed of either themselves or their friends? This is all bullshit!”

“Hey, calm down,” Five soothes. “Look, I know it’s hard.”

You snort. “It’s not ‘hard’, dumbass. I’m fine in this era.” It’s true; you’ve adjusted almost completely. Except for the concept of the computer—how can there be an entirely different world that people can only access through specific portals? This is literally magic—but not the actual use of it, you’re fine. In fact, you’re great. Everyone in this school is so transparent and easy to read and manipulate. “Everyone else is just stupid.”

Five has to give that one to you. “I mean, yeah, but we can’t really say that.”

A football player leans over to your desk. “Y/N, what’s the answer for number seven?”

“Well, I can’t just tell you that,” you whisper back, all traces of frustration wiped off your face. “Isn’t the point of this class to learn?” Five would be impressed with your acting if you weren’t flirting with another boy to do it.

No, he still hasn’t told you how he feels. He’d sort of assumed that you and him would end up together eventually, considering it would be sort of weird for an old lady in a young body to date a younger person, but you don’t seem to have a problem with it. You’ve got half the male population panting after you; they seem to think your accent is hot and your chameleon-like personality isn’t hurting things. To be honest, Five wouldn’t be bothered by the logistics of it if he didn’t love you.

Five grinds his teeth together as you and the oaf continue to flirt. Why on earth would you show interest in him? He’s not smart, and you don’t seem like the type of girl to wrap a meathead around your finger; you seem like the kind of girl that would have a partner that’s her equal in every way to push her and help her improve.

Or maybe he just thinks that because he wishes that was him you were flirting with.

Five’s about to kick your chair to get you to pay attention to him, dammit, but someone leans over and puts their pencil on his desk. All the flirting’s got him in a bad mood, so his expression when he turns to see what the person wants must be thunderous. Their expression is hilarious; they seem to think he’s about to kill them.

It’s a small girl named Angie with bouncy curls. She’s a part of the drama department of this infernal school. All Five knows about her is that she’s got a high-pitched voice and a great body. He’s sure you know more about her. You know just about everything about everyone.

“Hey, Paolo, I was just wondering,” she starts, biting her lip at Five and leaning further across the desk in an obvious attempt to entice him with her chest. He grimaces at the fake name he’d used to enroll with at the school. “Are you going to the dance with Y/N?”

Five blinks at her for a second. He’d expected her to ask him to the dance, but… “No,” he answers slowly, the beginnings of an idea forming in his head. He doesn’t even glance at her chest and instead stares at her levelly, which seems to unnerve her a little bit.

“Oh, cool!” She tosses her hair. “I know Michael is planning on asking her.”

Five’s jaw clenches and a muscle in it ticks. “I see.”

Angie gasps loudly and dramatically, which makes a few people look at her. Now you’re paying attention to the conversation, Five can tell, and he barely shakes his head: He’ll tell you later; keep paying attention to the doofus trying to get a look down your shirt.

“Paolo, do you like Y/N?” she whispers.

“She’s my best friend,” Five answers cautiously. He’s pretty sure he knows where this is going, but some of the modern slang still confuses him.

“But do you like… like like her?” Angie clarifies.

“No,” Five says unconvincingly. Hey, you’re the actor in this… it’s not a relationship. Partnership. You’re the actor in this partnership. “No, I just… I’m really protective of her,” he forces out. He can’t bring himself to say that he thinks of you like a sister. “You know, since we’ve been in the foster system together for so long.”

The bell rings and you finally extricate yourself from your conversation with the football oaf, much to Five’s relief. Next period he has is lunch, and if you leave Five for the football lunch table or bring the football boys to your shared table he just might throw a fit. You’re his partner, goddamnit, and you’re his best friend, and you’re his crush. He doesn’t like to share.

Well, he’s a bit protective of you. He wasn’t lying to Angie.

“What did she want?” you ask immediately, falling into step with him. God, walking everywhere is so tedious. Five would love to be able to jump to his classes, but he doesn’t need people to know that he’s really Five Hargreeves who disappeared years ago and has reappeared looking the exact same age.

“She said you should join the theater department,” he lies smoothly. He’s gotten much better at it; he’s not better than you, but there have been times when he’s been able to fool you. Like when he told you he wasn’t even planning on going to the dance.

Well, he’s not planning. He’s fantasized.

It might have something to do with your skill at reading him as an old man. You’re still getting used to Five in his kid body.

You snort. “I’m not an amateur.”

“Then go star in your own movie,” Five suggests. “I’m sure Allison could hook you up.” It’s actually a good idea; you’re great at acting and you’ve got connections, so why not? He steps in front of you when you look incredulous, bouncing on his heels. “Just think about it, Y/N,” he pleads. “Actors can build up a cult following. That would be a great place to start, right? It’s a relatively fun job, you’re really good at it, and as long as we’re successful we won’t even have to worry about money no matter what we do on the side!”

You bite your lip. “You really think so?” When too many people start giving you odd looks for standing in the middle of the hallway and building up traffic, you grab Five’s arm and start to haul him backwards towards the lunch room. You’re hungry.

“You know what, I’ve got an even better idea,” Five says, nearly tripping as he tries to turn himself around. You and him have hated the foster home you’ve been stuck in ever since you’ve gotten back. He’d refused to be adopted by one of his siblings, because that would be utterly humiliating, and also because if the two of you were adopted it’d be weird if you ever got together. “Allison can adopt you! It’ll help her reputation as a family woman or whatever if she’s adopting poor orphans.”

“What about you?” you ask, sitting down at your lunch table. Five sits across from you. No one dares to join you because of the nasty looks Five sends people.

Five grimaces. “Get adopted by one of my own siblings? No thanks.”

You scowl. “Five, that place is crappy. I’m not abandoning you in it especially when we have the option not to.”

“I don’t want to,” he insists. “My new name is Paolo without a last name. It’s a complete new start, and I can’t be adopted by any of my siblings because someone will inevitably make the connection. My appearance hasn’t changed at all, plus being a Hargreeves? But you’re unknown, Y/N. Besides, we’ll still hang out. I’ll just sleep over at the house, or maybe I won’t. They wouldn’t notice anyway.” The quick grin he flashes at you has butterflies fluttering in your stomach, so you look down at your lunch.

You pull out a thermos container and frown at it.

“That’s a thermos,” Five instructs, a little tired. “Unscrew the top. So it’s decided, then?”

“I’m not changing schools,” you decide. “I don’t want to leave you or join new teams.”

“I’m sure Allison won’t mind you living at the Academy,” Five shrugs. “Now I just need to decide what to do with my future.”

“I think being a model is out of the question,” you tease. It’s a total lie; he’d make fantastic money as a model. Five is hot as a kid.

“I’ll speak with Allison after we get out of school,” he says, smiling at you without showing teeth. “Not that I would want to be a model anyway, but if I did, I would be fantastic.”

“Yeah, if you were a model for nerdy loser time travelers,” you snort.

“I’m not a nerd!”

You fix Five with a look. “Honey, you’ve spent your entire life working on math.”

“Yeah, to get back to my family!” he protests. He’s not sure whether to be offended or just roll with the teasing.

You purse your lips and raise your eyebrows. “It was your personal decision to translate the problem into math. Honestly, I don’t know how you did manage to incorporate calculations into it; in case you haven’t noticed, there’s not a lot of math involved in, like, running or something.”

“When someone times you,” he counters.

You wave a hand dismissively. “Yeah, but you don’t have to be able to time your run in order to run.”

“Just forget it,” Five grumbles. “You don’t understand.”

You spear a piece of the chicken that was inside the thermos and take a hesitant bite. It’s not flavored at all. Spartan cooking may have been awful, but you’ve gotten used to good food.

Honestly, this foster home’s food might as well be straight from Sparta. Five hates it and generally steals food from stores and the cafeteria, especially when the foster parents forget completely to pack the food.

Truth be told, you’re a bit disappointed, but not in the food. The school’s big dance is coming up, and you’d hoped that Five would ask you, but he seems to have his eye on Angie. She seems to like him too, so you quickly gave up on that and started scouting out suitable males to take you. It’s not like it’s hard. They’re all so shallow and dumb.

You want to ask him if he’s taking Angie, either to dash your hopes once and for all or to know that you’ve still got a chance, but you can’t take that risk.

So you take another bite of the dry chicken and try to swallow it.

Word gets out quickly once you’re adopted by Allison. If you weren’t already the most popular girl at school, you are now. Everyone wants to be your friend. You pretend to want to be theirs, too, and the amount of people that unknowingly hand you information about possible conflicts to exploit are astronomical.

You know all about the fight that Susia and McKayla are having, and the problems George is having at home. Richard is cheating on his girlfriend, Katherine, with Drake.

You know everyone and everything, and only Five knows you.

Michael asked you to the dance. You’d panicked for once and told him you weren’t sure if you were going to be able to go anyway because of how chaotic the adoption is, because you hadn’t wanted to put up with him peering down your shirt and only talking about how your accent is attractive. You were never one of the femme fatale assassins, so you’re not very used to people showing interest in you. The only way you know anything about flirting is by doing it with Five for all the years you two haven’t been sniping at each other.

“It’s Paolo, isn’t it?” he’d asked, scowling, and you were so offput you’d forgotten for a moment who Paolo was.

“I—it’s no one,” you’d replied, confused. “I’m just not sure if Allison wants me to live at her house here or her other house. It’s just…” you look at the ground and bite your lip, playing the vulnerable girl card. “It’s really stressful. You’re here for me, though, right?”

“Yeah,” he’d replied, a little dazed.

You may not have had much practice, but you’re a very quick learner.

By the end of the day, word has spread like wildfire about how you might not be able to go to the dance and people are treating it like you just lost your mother or something. You’ve been approached by at least seven girls that have talked about how very sorry they are for you or some BS like that.

You can’t tell, but Five is ecstatic. He’d heard through Angie, who heard from Drake, who heard from Michael that you’d turned him down for the dance and said you didn’t know if you would be in town for it. Now, Five knows that’s a lie; you’d fight tooth and nail before letting anyone unenroll you from the school, but nobody else does.

He’s pretty sure you turned Michael down just because you didn’t want to go with him.

To be fair, that’s a decision anyone would have made, even if they didn’t have a crush on their partner/best friend/fellow assassin.

Still, he walks into your room after school and tells you to get up. It’s much larger than you’re used to, mostly because Allison is a mother and can’t picture you as anything other than a poor orphan girl with a tragic past and she wants to get to know you. You’re trying to be nicer to her because of her generosity.

“What?” you ask, putting down your book. “Why?”

“We’re going shopping,” Five says, rolling his eyes as if it was totally obvious. He’d stolen his foster mom’s credit card. She won’t even notice; she’s got like a hundred of them. Now he thinks about it, he should have just asked Allison to pay for the outing because she’s hella rich, but too late now. “Haven’t you learned by now from all our missions that dates have to wear matching outfits?” There was, like, one mission where he and you had to dress up and attend a dance together, but still.

“What?” you ask again. Five can see you blushing but decides against commenting.

“We’re going to the dance together,” he says slowly.

You blink. “Why?”

“Well, I know your excuse about not being sure if you would be in town is BS,” Five explains. God, he hopes you can’t see his nerves. “So you will be in town for the dance. And if you turned down Michael, that means you really don’t want to attend the dance with him. And if you’re there, he’ll want to dance with you. So—”

“All right, I get it!” you say loudly, cutting him off. Typical Five. Always looking out for you. You’re not a younger sibling that he needs to protect. This is going to be torture. Can’t he tell that you like him?

Of course he can’t. Like he’d said, you’re an amazing actress. Allison has already started sending out your headshots to different agents. She says you really have a future as an actress.

“Sure,” you say, getting up and leaving the book on your bed. “Won’t that make people think we’re dating or something, though?”

“We can just say we’re going as friends,” Five shrugs. “I mean, we’ve got the act going that we’re close because we grew up in the foster system together, so that would explain why we would go together.”

“All right.” You grin and interlock your arm with his. “Just warning you, though, I will be recognized.”

“I can handle a bit of fame,” Five says, rolling his eyes. “You forget I was a child star myself.”

“That is true,” you concede and start to drag him out of the house. “Allison, Five and I are going shopping!”

“Have fun!” she calls back from her room. “Do you need money?”

“I have a credit card!” Five yells.

“Who’s? It’s not one of mine, is it?”

Five pretends not to hear her and pulls you out of the house before she can quiz you two anymore.

Five swallows thickly when you open up the door to the Hargreeves mansion. You’re wearing your y/f/c dress and Allison’s hair stylist must have done your hair because it’s up in an elaborate twist.

“Hey,” you say, a little shyly. God, Five in a suit is going to be the death of you.

“Hey,” he replies, dazed. Allison has to clear her throat behind you two to get you to stop staring at each other.

“Y/N, I want you back by eleven,” she says sternly.

You glare at her. “Absolutely not.”

“Y/N, it is still a school night,” she starts but you’re already shaking your head.

“That’s what coffee’s for, Allison.”

She sputters, but you’re already out of the house, so she sighs wearily. I swear, if Claire’s anything like this when she’s older, Patrick will hand her right over to me with a smile on his face.

As you’d expected, the rumors start to circulate the moment you and Five step into the school arm in arm. A combination of intimidation of your new status as the celebrity kid and genius, and people’s fright of Five, keeps too many people from approaching you, though you notice Michael and Angie glaring at you two from opposite sides of the room, both with arms crossed and pouts on their faces.

“Did I tell you?” you ask, which is the first thing you’ve said since stepping in the school. For some reason, the air is thick between you and Five, and you sort of hate it. “I got a role.”

“Really? What is it?”

“Some movie adaptation of a book,” you say airily, waving your hand. “I’ll have to read it, of course, but I got the gist of it from that Wikipedia thing, and it’s a dystopian story. Lots of destruction. I’m sure you’ll feel right at home when you watch it, huh?” You nudge Five’s shoulder with yours and smile, trying to get him to, but he’s glancing around the room like he’s waiting for someone. If he’s going to ditch you, you’ll kill him. “Hello?” Five?” You wave your hand in front of his face. He doesn’t even blink. “Five.” You snap your fingers and he jerks away from you.

“What?” he snaps and you blink. He hasn’t snapped at you for a long time.

“Never mind,” you reply, unhooking your arm from around his. “I’ll be right back.” You march across the dance floor right to Angie. She tries to paste a smile onto her face when she sees you coming, but it’s obviously fake.

“You like Paolo, right?” you ask bluntly. You have a feeling she’s not in the mood to pussyfoot around anything right now.

“I don’t think I should be saying so to his date,” she replies, which is an inadvertent yes.

You wave your hand. “We came as friends. He’s not interested in even talking to me, though. Maybe he’ll be interested in talking to you.”

“Really?” Angie smiles at you.

“Good luck,” you reply. “You know how prickly he can be.”

She laughs softly. “Uh, yeah. Do you know if he likes me back?”

“He sure as hell doesn’t like me,” you say without thinking, which makes her brows crinkle with worry.

“Y/N, you aren’t interested in Paolo, right? I don’t want to make a move on him if you—”

“Doesn’t matter,” you reply. “He’s made it very clear we are just friends.”

Angie bounces across the floor. When you turn around, you’re confronted with a large chest. When you look up, Michael is forcing a very pained smile onto his face. “Hey, Y/N.”

You want to shoot yourself. “Hi, Michael!”

“You said you weren’t going to the dance,” he says pointedly, eyes flickering over to where Angie and Five are now talking.

“I honestly thought I wasn’t,” you fib. “By the time I found out, I thought you already had a date and I knew Fi—Paolo didn’t, so I thought it would be best to go as friends.”

“Why’d you think I already had a date?”

“I heard it somewhere,” you say vaguely. Before Michael can say anything else, a loud slap echoes around the room. Your head jerks around to where Angie is storming away from your ex-partner, looking to be about to cry, and Five is glaring after her, one hand on his cheek.

“Jesus Christ,” you mutter under your breath. “Excuse me, Michael.” You hike up your dress and make it across the room before any of the teacher supervisors can converge on Five and ask him if he’s okay. You take the scowling boy by the ear and drag him out of the room in the opposite direction Angie left in, ignoring the wolf whistles that sound out and one loud “Ooh, someone’s in trouble!”

“Get off me!” Five exclaims the moment you step out of the room. You let go of his ear and instead grab the front of his shirt.

“What the hell did you say to her?”

“Shouldn’t you be worried about me?” Five gripes. “I’m the one that just got the shit slapped out of me!”

“Shut up, you’re fine,” you reply. “God knows you’ve gone through worse. Now I want to know why Angie’s suddenly on a slapping spree just after talking to you. Not that it isn’t a common urge I have whenever you even open up your mouth—”

“She was trying to get me to dance,” Five says sulkily, shoving his hands in his pockets as you let go of his shirt.

“So?” You look at him with disbelief. “What did you say to her, exactly?”

“I didn’t say anything!” he protests. “I told her I didn’t want to dance with her!”

You raise one skeptical eyebrow.

“Okay,” he grinds out. “And I called her—”

“I don’t even want to hear it,” you mutter. “You know, you deserve to get slapped sometimes, right?”

“And you won’t even let me trip you,” he mutters.

“Yeah, because I’m better than you,” you automatically reply. “Besides, why wouldn’t you dance with Angie just one time? She’s nice and she likes you! Don’t you like her?”

“God, no,” he replies viscerally. “God. No.”

“What’s so disgusting about her?” you ask, genuinely curious. Does he know something about Angie that you don’t?

“She isn’t you,” he blurts out, and both your eyes get as big as dinner plates. “Wait! Shit! I didn’t mean to say that!” Five tries to babble, but the damage is done.

“What’s that supposed to mean?” you cut him off.

“It’s just that, well, she’s, you know. And, well, most girls are, well. And… you know?” He stares at you and chews his lip, awaiting your response like he made any sense at all.

“No, I don’t know,” you say slowly. “What do you mean, Five?”

Either he leans forward or he trips when he steps forward, but suddenly Five’s lips are on yours, a little too rough, and you instinctively pull back with shock.

“She’s not you,” Five repeats, breathing a little heavily. “Look, I get if you don’t feel the same way, but I had to get it out there. I like you, Y/N; I have since before we got our second chance and, god, I’ve really fucked up now, but I just—”

You grab the front of his shirt again and stand on your tiptoes to press your lips to his again. It turns out to be the best way to get him to shut up.

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[perfectclassic]

I remember back when I played football in high school. But let’s start from the beginning.

I played pop warner when I was like 7 years old. I was extremely shy and small and didn’t really get much playing time because of that. But I was fast, and that went overlooked too. I played for the Anaheim Lions. I remember a lot of moments...wow... -I wore a red tank top to the first day and was late. -I remember our running back...he was light skinned, half hispanic half white kid. I remember thinking at the time that he reminded me of the kid on our fridge who our family sponsored in Ecuador. -One day in practice, I ran down that star player and the coach was amazed that he got caught. He asked who got him and I raised my hand, and then the coach said something about angles and tackling as if it wasn’t just my raw speed. I was so overlooked, but I was way too shy to speak up about anything. -Before a game when we were all lined up to go out to the field, I don’t remember how it was brought up, but some teammates were talking about who was faster, and I think I spoke up and said I was faster than someone, that someone being “Lupe”, and everyone said he was faster, but I knew the truth. So we actually raced to a tree and back and I won.

Then I played flag football in 6th grade at Calvary Chapel Downey. We had coach Gallegos. He’d always say, “Alright, guys, now check it out...” haha, my best friend at the time and still to today, Josh, does the best impression of coach doing that exact quote. Wow next memory rush incoming... -I remember Dominic...wow...now I’m just thinking about all of 6th grade... but let me try and stay on track here... -I remember one of the first days, everyone was really hyped that I was out there and gonna play. I was a new student in 5th grade, and my athleticism, sport IQ, and top tier speed was evident at recess and lunch year round. So anyways, we did this drill where you had to juke a guy 1v1 and get thru the flags. And when it was my turn everyone was watching with anticipation, and I could feel it. And the coach was like all interested because word had gotten around from some of the other students I guess, so yeah haha. Then my flag got pulled everytime in the drill lol. Like I couldn’t utilize my speed cuz the boundries were so narrow and this was my first time wearing flags (you have to juke a certain way to be effective). -I remember Elijah Denton was our punter. -I was named 3rd string running back at beginning of the season, but I got the ball the most. But we had a lot of good players and we went undefeated... -until we lost in the championship in a fluky game with possible ref bias to a team we had beaten before. -I had a long touchdown run along the sideline and the ref called it back saying I stepped on out of bounds and I remember I was upset about that. -I got MVP at the awards ceremony.

Then I played flag football in jr. high. Wow memory flood... So it was 7th and 8th grade together on a team. This is still at Downey... My goodness I’m having so many memories of jr. high now. I’ll have to write about some of these memories another time. But for football when I was in 7th grade, I remember... -once, my girlfriend, Kristine, came to one of my games. We kinda became a thing in 6th grade. OH MY GOSH, I’m remembering so much now. I’ll have to write about this later too. ANYWAYS, her mom took a picture of us together at that game and I still have that picture. She was so much taller than me haha! But I think it’s normal for girls to start getting taller before guys, right? Especially around that age. -I remember our head coach, Coach Jones. Did not like him. Not a nice person at all. My talent went overlooked. I was still very shy. -I remember intercepting a ball that was thrown to his son in practice; Tyler was his name, and he started pouting like it was pass interference (lol no way), and his dad starting telling me, “you can’t go through the receiver...” blah blah blah. -I remember Eric Toscano, and how I would carpool with him and vice versa since they lived kinda close to us. -The coaches really got hyped on Eric one practice in the middle of the season cuz he was doing well and then they made him a starter. -I was pretty much overlooked. Underutilized talent per usual, partly because I’m so quiet and stuff. -Mr. Mendez was a coach too. His son was also on the team, 8th grader. Mr. Mendez was nice. -During the season I was getting really bad pains in my ankles and knees and my doctors diagnosed it as growing pains. I remember taking tylenol grape chewable tablets before practice. -I just sat in my chair for a few minutes thinking about this memory, wondering also if I should even share it, but I think I will. I even cried at one practice because we were all getting yelled at and doing sprints and my ankle was in so much pain, but I was too shy to say anything and plus Coach Jones is not a nice, approachable, understanding person. So it got to a point where I just went down on one knee and grabbed my ankle and I started crying a bit.  -There was a time where Ian was like my new friend. He was an 8th grader, super funny, and for whatever reason, he decided he wanted to be friends with me. I was thrilled with this new friendship to be honest. I remember after the end of one of our games he was like, “Where’s Maxx?!” so we could celebrate the win together. And then later when I was home, my dad asked me who that guy was that was looking for me after the game. -But that friendship with Ian was short lived. It seemed to me to be a thing that he did often. He would move from person to person like every 2 weeks. I don’t know if that was intentional or what, but I did observe that. -I remember a play I made on a kickoff where the other team did this lateral across the field on their return and I saw it coming all-day; not because it was obvious, I just have high football IQ (just being honest lol). And I pulled the guy’s flag soon as he caught the ball. And I went back to the sideline and Coach Jones gave me a high five and said “Way to stay home baby!”. And he was right, I stayed home just like I should have. But in my mind, I was thinking I should have been more aggressive and tried to intercept the lateral, because I saw it coming. Had I been more comfortable in the coaching staff knowing who I was and in my actual ability, I probably would’ve had the confidence to pull the trigger and not be afraid at taking shots at big plays. -Once at the end of the game, I was put in the game because we were gonna win and we were just running the ball to kill the clock. I was hoping to at least get the ball, get some handoffs. But I didn’t. All went to Aaron. I was upset. Then when I went to the sideline my bestie Josh told me that one of the coaches suggested to give me the ball for a play and Coach Jones said “No, he’ll screw it up.” -I think our banquet was at a Shakey’s. Ok, now 8th grade football was an absolute delight. It was probably the most fun year of football in my life. I just remembered, where our games and practice field were. We’d have to cross the street together at the crosswalk every day after school. I have a lot of memories on that field. So yeah, 8th grade football was filled with so much laughter with my best friends. -I remember having a race to see who was the fastest and I was so happy to hear it. So everyone raced and I won. But there was one kid who was actually not too far behind, and that was Joshua Guerra, a 7th grader. I remember him showing everyone his six pack in the locker room lol. But I went and talked to him after practice in the locker room and telling him he’s fast and stuff and he was pretty nice and polite, but he said he was surprised, and I could tell it bothered him (confirmed true). But I get it, I had been an elite fast kid my whole life. To lose a race would be test the ego was not used to. -We had Coach Hearron (I just looked up his name to see if I was spelling it correctly (I was), and I came across this: “his favorite shout out from the WORD is ‘MARANATHA!’”. So true! haha) as our head coach. -And Coach Christie. Josh and I would always mock his odd throwing motion with the full extended follow through haha. -Mr. Christie taught us about Thomas Hooker. -I got the ball a lot this year. So did Josh. Micah was our QB. We dominated everyone. -On one of the rival teams, there was a kid that looked like a chicken. Like he literally could have chicken dna like infused with human dna. Idk if that makes sense, but that’s what he looked like. -We won the championship. I remember Mr. Mendez, who had been a coach last year, said to me and another teammate in our class (he was a math teacher) after we had won the championship, “Wasn’t it easier though this year with the competition?”. And yes, it was, he wasn’t wrong. The team that we had lost to the year before was a really good team, but their school now had changed their jr. high football program to tackle, so they weren’t around anymore. I feel like I’ve written enough for this post. I’ll have to talk about high school football in it’s own post another time. Thanks for reading.