#oooooooooh the drama

[imaginethezeldaverse]

"Ah, sorry I'm late, Bludo, it took a while to find the right herbs" your apology sincere as you carefully handed the large jar to him. Being a medicinal herb specialist, you were always happy to help the ailing chief with his problems. Admittedly, the Gorons were happy to have you, his original pain medicine beginning to lose its effectiveness after having taken it so many times to soothe his aches and pains. In you would swoop, like an angel with leaves (as Bludo loved to joke) to mix a concoction of Korok fronds, Goron hot spring water and broken-down hearty truffles. The result: a salve capable of relaxing the muscles in the boss's back - only this time with more potency and without the risk of tolerance buildup. The Goron patriarch beamed with joy, knowing he could count on you to fix him up something nice for his awful back was worth the wait, he figured. He was incredibly grateful for your talents, and even moreso that his assistant-turned-entrepreneur legend was the one to introduce you. You'd met Yunobo in your travels, crossing paths in Hyrule post-Ganondorf as you tended to the wounded and the sick. Though you didn't possess the same healing qualities as the Zora did, you were blessed to have the capability of mentally archiving a vast amount of knowledge of plant-life and all of their properties. He was sweetly reserved, that you remembered - but there was fire in him (as you would find out quite literally!) and he often aided you in transporting people since his Goron strength allowed for it with ridiculous ease. From there, his journey back home was at its beginning, and he begged you to come with him - his chief in desperate need of something to relieve his old back of its soreness. The rest was history. "Ha! Ya always know exactly when to show up, kiddo" Bludo guffaws, taking the jar from you and planting his hand over you to rub the top of your head. You laughed softly at the old man's affections. People often warned you he was rough around the edges, but you swore Bludo had been nothing but kind to you. Whether that was because you supplied him with the holy grail of pain relief remains to be seen. "Anytime, Bludo, I'm always happy to help you," you affirmed, matching his grin with your own. "Y'see, and you're nice t'boot," he continues, finally reeling his hand back from your now tousled hair, "Now I know why the boy likes you so dang much, you're a one inna million." You feel your heart initially flutter at this information, but that pales in comparison to the sheer thump you feel in your chest when you look behind Bludo. The "boy" in question - was standing not far off from you both; his initial intention was to welcome you back from herb hunt. As soon as the words left the Boss's mouth, Yunobo froze. You can tell by the way he looks ready to run that this was something you weren't supposed to hear; at least not this way and definitely not from anyone else. His cheeks color several shades of crimson, and although you want to look anywhere else to give him some reprieve, you can't help but have your eyes glued to his humiliated expression. Bludo looks between the two of you, unsure of exactly what's happening. "Yunobo..." you begin, earning a yelp when the Goron hears his name. A few steps forward, only a hair past his mentor do you stand when you ask "...Is that true?" His world is melting all around him as he processes your question. Is it true that he looks forward to your visits every time you come to Goron City? Is true that your laughter dances like a song inside of chest? Is it true that he thinks you're the most beautiful, intelligent, wonderous person he's ever had the pleasure of meeting? Of course it was. It was all true. But he wasn't ready to tell you that yet. Given who he is and the power he wields, he wanted more time. More time for you to get to know him, to feel truly comfortable around him. More time to veer past President Yunobo of YunoboCo, or Sage of Fire Yunobo - but rather simply Yunobo, just a Goron from the city. He swore he planned to tell you. You've been on his mind so much already, he just...he just...! Within a mere second's time, Yunobo curled up into a ball and zoomed out toward Death Mountain - actual fire trailing behind him as he rolled away. Your hand came to your face in surprise, you'd never seen him be so agile before! Once the initial shock of his departure wore off, something sad crept into your heart. For all the long months that you had visited and stayed in Goron City, all the lovely conversations at Hyrule Castle, the shared meals, the many many times you reassured one another through your own individual weariness'... You were honestly hoping it was true.

[autisticlancemcclain]

In all the love songs Keith has heard (and he’s heard many, both his Pa and Shiro were big ballad fans), he’s always heard laughter described as angelic.

That’s how it is. Over and over again. When you fall in love with someone, when cupid’s arrow strikes, their laughter will be like musical bells, like windchimes, melodic and beautiful and entrancing, and you will never want to hear anything else.

Lance sounds like a hyena on crack when he laughs.

Keith is obsessed with it.

The love ballads got one half of it right, he supposes. He does shut the fuck up and listen when Lance laughs. It is like the only sound he can hear.

It’s just not…musical.

“Your sighs get any dreamier and he’s going to hear you,” Shiro says idly, colouring his nails with Sharpie.

Keith drops his chin from his hands, turning away from where he was watching Lance laugh with Hunk and Allura and scowling at his asshole brother. “He is not.”

Shiro snickers, not even bothering to look up. Keith wonders if it’s morally acceptable to smack the shit out of someone with only one arm, or if Shiro will call foul and convince everyone that Keith is somehow the asshole here.

“Is so. You’re so besotted that even I’m embarrassed for you, and I usually just laugh when you’re being humiliating.”

Keith decides that the potential reputation tarnishing is worth it.

“Ow!” Shiro cries, clutching his flesh arm with way more drama than necessary. “My arm!” He glances over at the scattered stares he receives, from various uniformed officers, and pitches his voice louder to get more attention. “My only remaining human arm!”

“Keith, stop trying to kill your brother,” Coran admonishes. “He’s sensitive.”

Shiro shoots him the tiniest smirk before returning to his fake pout. Keith’s jaw drops in indignation. “Wh — he antagonized me — it’s not my — Coran!”

Coran only raises his eyebrows. “Is there a problem, Number Three, or shall I get your mother involved?”

Pidge makes an obnoxious oooooooooh sound, wiggling her eyebrows at him, because she and Shiro are the worst, actually, and for good measure Coran is too.

“I hate this family,” Keith mutters, sinking into his seat. “All of you suck.”

“Okay, emo boy,” Shiro says patronizingly.

Unfortunately, Iverson walks in and starts the Atlas briefing before Keith can smack him again. He settles for glaring at his dumbass brother, who sticks his tongue out at him like the toddler he is, and then vows to pay attention to the meeting. He is the black paladin, after all.

He lasts four whole minutes.

It’s not his fault. If anything it’s Iverson’s fault. The meeting is boring as hell, and a quick glance around the meeting table shows that the only person paying attention is the note-taking robot Pidge made, and that doesn’t even count ‘cause it’s a robot. Several senior officers are outright sleeping. The MFE pilots are quietly passing around a game of dots. Hunk has blatantly pulled out an engineering project of his and is working on it in full and total view of Iverson (he still hates the man for what he did to Lance when they were cadets, claiming that since Lance has forgiven him, someone needs to hold a grudge). Pidge and Matt seem to be communicating in Morse code. Allura is directing her mice in some kind of acrobatic performance, and Coran is helping her. Shiro is trying to see how many spitballs he can land on Iverson’s blind side before he notices (he’s riding the line with 34). Lance is staring at Keith.

Lance is staring at Keith?

He startles when he meets Lance’s brown eyes, but Lance only smiles, wiggling his fingers in a little wave. Keith tilts his head in confusion, trying to wordlessly ask Lance why he’s staring, and also manage to keep his rapidly creeping blush under control.

(He likes it when Lance stares at him).

Lance squeezes his eyes shut instead of answering, and a moment later Keith feels a prodding in the back of his mind; a familiar presence, hot and fiery and all-encompassing.

Red.

He lets her in, lets her familiar feeling envelop his mind. She struts primly in his mindscape, nosing at Black as if to say I was here first, so just remember who’s boss.

Black lets her prance around with fond amusement.

Before Keith can ask her why she’s pushed her way through — not that he minds, he’s happy to have her, but she hasn’t felt the need to visit him in a while so he’s curious — he feels another presence almost knock on his subconscious, request access to his mindscape.

Red has…brought someone else?

Can she do that?

Red looks at him flatly, like his doubt is a personal offence. Before she can start admonishing him, the presence pushes again; not urgent, but insistent, almost as if someone is knocking on the door of Keith’s mind and doesn’t want to be ignored.

Beyond curious, Keith lets them in.

The second Keith opens his mental door, it’s like they rush in, flowing in like the white rapids of a river, strong and fast and excited, cool and bubbly. There’s so much of them that it takes Keith a good couple of minutes to conceptualise just who exactly has followed Red into Keith’s mind. The rushing water takes shape into a person; tall, gangly, broad-shoulders with a mop of curly brown hair and bright brown eyes, freckles spotted over their nose and grin wide and sparking.

Keith gapes.

“Lance?!”

“Is everything alright, Kogane?”

Keith blinks open his eyes to find the entire meeting table staring at him, expressions ranging from confused to knowing to outright teasing. He realises all of a sudden that he’s spoken aloud, and not only spoken but called Lance’s name out, loudly, for seemingly no reason, in the middle of a crowded meeting.

His face flames.

“All is well,” he chokes out. “Please carry on.”

Iverson narrows his eyes at him for a moment, but eventually shakes himself and continues. Keith stays bright red for several minutes, staring pointedly down at the table, ignoring the various sniggers he can hear with every ounce of his effort. Unfortunately, some of the teasing laughter is inside his actual literal brain, what the fresh fuck, so it’s a fruitless endeavour.

Are you still freaking out? the Lance inside his head (???) asks.

What in the gall brained fuck is going on, Keith thinks back at it, looking at Real Lance in a decent mix of panic, confusion, and the actual phonetic sound that an exclamation point mixed with a question mark makes in your brain. Real Lance has his eyes closed, brows creased in concentration, and the tiniest of smirks pulling up at his lips.

Close your eyes and meditate, doofus, Mind Lance tells him. I’m using a lot of energy right now so I don’t have the space to try and reign you up here.

Despite the fact that Keith is so confused that a thousand professors could not explain his current situation to him in any way that makes sense, he listens, closing his eyes tightly and visualizing his physical bond with Black, like he does when he flies. It helps him sink into the semi-astral plane of existence, usually so he can meld with his lion and the rest of the team when they’re forming Voltron, but whenever he’s trying to reach his own mindscape, too. He’s still aware of his physical body, he’s not quite projected out of it, but he’s not wholly in it, either. Most of his essence is focused on seeing as his mind sees, without the constraints of the physical plane.

“Took you long enough,” Lance huffs.

“What the fuck,” Keith responds.

He packs quite a lot of questions into that what the fuck, he thinks. Like ‘what the fuck are you doing here’, for starters. Or ‘what the fuck just happened with the water and Red and everything else’, if he wants to be specific. Or, if he really just wants to cover everything, ‘what the fuck is happening’ might just do it.

“Your internal monologue fascinates me,” Lance informs him.

Keith flushes. (Does he flush in his mindscape? Does he have the blood and physical body necessary in order to flush? Or is he just embarrassed, so his perception of himself is blushing because that’s the only way he knows how to conception use the feeling? God, Voltron magic shit is so weird. Keith lowkey misses mapping energies alone in the desert and wondering if he was delusional.)

“Stop hearing my internal monologue,” he orders.

Lance pouts. “You’re no fun. I want to hear all the juicy gossip you think about me because you’re too emotionally stunted to say it.”

Lance is only joking, Keith knows he is. He’s leaned forward slightly, like he always does when he’s teasing, and his smile is close-mouthed, unserious.

But Keith of course panics anyway.

A million snapshots of Lance flash through his mind — Lance laughing, head thrown back, barely holding himself up; Lance dancing around the briefing room at two in the morning as he plans a mission; Lance with his tongue stuck out of his mouth, concentrating hard on tiny knitting needles and tiny little mouse-sweaters; Lance with tears shining in his eyes, glancing at a projection of Earth, long before they finally made it home; Lance dirty and hurt, cradled to his chest as Keith runs him too a pod after Sendak. A thousand moments of Lance when Keith was fondest of him, when just looking at him made the ballads Keith grew up with play in his head.

He hurries to shove the memories in an obscure corner of his head and prays that Lance doesn’t see them.

“Can you actually hear my thoughts,” Keith asks, a little desperately.

Lance waves a dismissive hand. “Nah. I get emotional impressions, but that’s about it. I can’t even see anything in here expect you and Red, basically. And Black. Hi, Black!” He waves excitedly to the lion, who sits regally in the dead centre of Keith’s mindscape. She turns to the red paladin in amusement, nodding her head once. Lance beams.

Keith feels a rush of fondness for him so potent it makes his heart hurt, a little.

“Woah,” Lance says, looking at him a little wide-eyed. “I felt that, Willie Nelson. Holy softie.”

“How and why are you here,” Keith says, blatantly changing the subject and not giving even one single shit about being subtle about it. Lance is looking at him too closely.

Luckily, Lance indulges him, or is too excited about being here in general to resist talking about it.

“Isn’t it so cool?” he gushes. “I’ve been working on it with Red for ages! I figured since we all have that emotional bond with each other and the lions during Voltron, and we keep our lion bonds outside of Voltron, we should be able to communicate with each other outside of Voltron, too. Red wasn’t sure if it was possible but she helped me try, and I figured I’d try with you first because it would be the easiest, since we’re so close and all. And you’re more likely to let me in your head.”

He says it so matter-of-factly. Like it’s obvious that they are so close, and that Keith loves him so much that he wouldn’t mind Lance in his head, not really.

The worst part is that he’s right.

With anyone else, this would feel like an invasion of space. Keith would be defensive immediately, angry even, throwing them right the hell out of his head and yelling at them as he does it.

But with Lance?

He’s a little shocked, sure. And worried, that Lance is going to see all the parts of him that Keith isn’t ready yet to show him; the parts that he doesn’t yet know how to say, how to show. The parts of Keith that soften every time Lance smiles at him, the parts that light up with gleeful competition whenever Lance eggs him on, the parts that chafe and ache but smooth over when Lance sits with him quietly when he’s hurting.

Keith knows that Lance knows that he loves him. He doesn’t exactly hide it. He’s not sure he would, even if he could.

But he’s not ready to tell him. Not yet.

He takes a deep breath. (Or whatever the mindscape equivalent is).

He knows Lance won’t go looking.

“And you decided to pull this telepathy shit in the middle of a random meeting?” Keith teases, allowing some of the worry to slip away.

This is, after all, cool as shit, even if it’s weird.

“It’s not an important meeting!” Lance defends. “It’s boring, and I needed entertainment! Besides, Pidge’s bot will give us all the notes anyway.”

“Yeah, yeah. Slacker. Some right hand man you are.”

Keith spends the rest of the dead-boring meeting teasing and chatting with Lance in his mindscape, which is great because he both gets to mess with Lance, which is always a net positive, because he has the upper hand in his own head, and because he gets to look like he’s paying attention in the meeting and actually be completely checked out.

“Oh, hey, I think the meeting’s ending,” Lance says. “I can hear Iverson winding down a bit.”

“Time to get out of my head then, you squatter?”

Lance rolls his eyes, waving to Red to get her attention. She stalks over, nosing him in the head like a mother cat to her kitten. Lance bats her away. “Yeah, yeah. I’ll head out. But only because I’m not practiced enough at this thing, so if I stay in your head it’ll look like I’m frozen or something. Once I figure out how to look normal and still beam my thoughts into your head, you’re never going to be without me even once in your life.”

Lance is teasing again. Keith can tell. But still, he’s totally helpless to stop what comes out next.

“I’d be okay with that.”

He sounds so besotted he wants to smack himself. But before he can even have the space to be embarrassed, he feels a wave of emotions that aren’t his — Lance’s, from the other end of their connection, a mix of embarrassment and selfish pleasure so thick that Keith can feel it even though they’re in Keith’s mindscape.

His jaw drops.

Lance wants Keith’s undivided attention. He’s preening over it.

“I gotta go,” Lance says hastily. “Uh, meeting ending and everything.”

Before Keith can so much as stop him, he feels the same strange feeling as before, the cool, rushing water of a river, only this time it’s flowing out of of his head rather than into it. Lance has retreated hastily from his mindscape, and Red follows, much slower and much more smug, visibly laughing at her paladin.

When Keith opens his eyes again, Lance is bright red, and won’t meet his eyes.

Keith smiles. Maybe he’s not the only one who’s not quite ready to spill his guts.

———

part two

[lesbiandatekaname]

The "Rusty Quill Article" from the perspective of a journalism student.

So there has been a lot of stuff going around about an article made by someone that lays out some possible/probable/whatever misconduct. And there are some ways that people have been discussing it that I want to weigh in.

My Credentials: I'm in my senior year as a Journalism and Media Production major (I won't say which university because this is the internet). I've taken a lot of courses about journalism, including its ethics and writing conventions.

The Writer

"Who's Afraid of Alex J. Newall?" was written by Newt Schottelkotte on Medium and edited by Tal Minear and Wil Williams. The article extensively details possible misconduct

Possible bias: Upon publishing the article, Schottelkotte made no note of being the Director of Marketing at the podcast network Fables & Folly. When this was pointed out online, Schottelkotte added an editor's note to the bottom of the article that reads

Newt Schottelkotte is currently the Marketing Director for Fable & Folly Network, but has worked as an independent creator and journalist for longer. This information was not disclosed; a disclosure has been added.

So what gives? That's pretty biased, right? Surely F&F stands to gain a lot if Rusty Quill were to shut down or lose public favor, and the author hid that fact. I, however, would take that with a heavy grain of salt. As noted Schottelkotte has worked independently in podcasting since 2016 and got their position at F&F this year. Furthermore, they've actually worked for a lot of podcast networks, also available in that link, and the emphasis on F&F made by some people may be a bit overzealous. Yes, F&F could stand to gain from RQ experiencing troubles (though more of the nebulous way that a lot of podcast networks would), but Schottelkotte overall is an independent contractor and that's probably the reason they didn't mention it in the article originally. Minear and Williams are unaffiliated with F&F.

Something else about journalistic bias: No article is ever truly unbiased. There is no way for it to be. There are some cases where bias is so blatant that the person shouldn't be put on the story, but most of the time the best people are able to do is manage their bias.

The Purpose

Some people have disparaged the article for trying to "cancel" RQ. To this I would merely like to point out that the article is not addressed to podcast consumers, but to podcast creators.

They do address the possible consumers later towards the end, where they attempt to dissuade people from harassing former/current employees and projects

In the final section, they do ask readers to think about supporting The Magnus Protocol Kickstarter with the clear bent of "Supporting the Kickstarter could mean that you're supporting abusive industry practices." There is clearly some biased language here, and a call to action such as this could definitely be considered "iffy" journalism, so take that as you will.

The Sources

Oooooooooh the sources. Schottelkotte's article uses a few external sources, and then a number of anonymous sources that are ex-employees of RQ or people who were offered a position there. All interviewees are anonymous, and people have raised some eyebrows at this.

In journalism you are generally supposed to avoid confidential sources. They cause an obvious verification issue. If people don't know who your sources are, how do they know that you're not just making everything up?

That being said. The audio drama podcast industry is rather small. RQ itself is somewhat of a household name, and is even more of a juggernaut in a place like Britain. I can absolutely understand why these people would feel nervous about speaking publicly for fear of being blacklisted due to being considered "hard to work with" or "disloyal" or fear of backlash from RQ themselves. Take these sources with a grain of salt, but also understand that there are reasonable grounds for these sources being confidential.

Conclusion

I encourage people to go read the article, hence why I linked it at the beginning. Something that I would ask for people who point out the issues with sources is to demand accountability from RQ. Demand that they respond (As Schottelkotte asked them to do at least once, possibly several times. It's a bit unclear in the article). Look at the facts that we do know and ask yourself that even if they don't directly verify claims do they at least line up with them? Journalism is meant to inform, but there can also be more beyond a dichotomy "this article is can be trusted" vs. "this article cannot be trusted." Use this as an opportunity to ask questions.

[mrsbsmooth]

See FB needs to hire me because the angst scenarios I have after this weeks episode is 👀

Like Alex over here finding out Estelle lied and is feeling regretful & apologetic towards mc, but mc isn't having it and tells him that now it's her turn for her to think and be alone.

Oooooooooh can you imagine??? That would be absolute drama central omgggg!!??? Like give me the opportunity to rip Bruno Alex a new one for doubting me the way I haven’t been allowed to in previous seasons 👀

I want him to GROVEL like seriously let me RAKE HIM OVER THE COALS this season is almost over that man needs a grand gesture of epic proportions for believing his ex over us FRRRRR

[hannahhook7744]

Guess Who's BACK?:

Auradon's Hottest Reality Show—Dr. Jiminy!

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Summary: In which Jiminy Cricket has a show like Dr Phil that also does paternity testing. Trigger Warnings: Implied Child Neglect/Abuse, Implied abuse of power, baby mama drama, implied cheating, etc. LMK if I should add more to the list.

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Dr Jiminy: Now Gaston, is it true that you refuse to claim little Gemma here as your own?

*a video of Gemma pops up on screen*

Gaston: Yes, because she's not mine!

Crowd *boos and starts throwing stuff*

Crowd member 1: YOU SUCK!

Crowd member 2: YOU STINK!

Enchantress, Jumping up:   THAT'S A LIE AND YOU FUCKING KNOW IT! SHE HAS YOUR FACE! YOUR EYES!

Dr Jiminy: Ma'am calm down. Now, Gaston, why do you think Gemma isn't yours?

Gaston: cause no girl could be a child of Gastons! It's impossible! My family can only create boys!

*booing gets louder, gagging can be heard. Steam is coming off of the Enchantress*

Dr Jiminy in disbelief, waves a paper in the air: Well, this DNA test will prove whether or not that's correct. Drum roll please!

*drum roll starts*

3...

2...

1..

Dr Jiminy: Gaston..

*Gaston, arms crossed, looking smug*

Dr Jiminy: You ARE the father!

Crowd *starts screaming*

Gaston *jumps up* LIES! This is RIGGED!

Dr Jiminy: Now, Gaston, I understand that you're upset but--

Gaston *starts throwing chairs and destroying furniture *

Gaston Jr, backstage *Covers Gemma’s ears* So, who’s gonna tell him that the Enchantress’s little boy ain’t his?

Gaston Third *glares* No one. 

Gaston Jr *rolls eyes* I was just kidding, sheesh. 

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Dr Jiminy : Queen Leah, is it true that upon seeing your 18 year old granddaughter's ex purpose to his new girlfriend, you said and I quote "A lifetime of plans. Gone. Our family status gone. Audrey, you were supposed to be his queen, and you let him slip through your fingers. Your mother could hold on to a prince in her sleep."

Crowd *gasps*

Queen Leah: yes but—

Crowd: BOOOOOOOOOOO!

Person in the crowd: YOU STINK!

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Dr Jiminy : Is it true that you gave your daughters the Cinderella treatment--

Drizella *stands up and starts yelling* No, That would be my bitch of a mother and MY children wouldn’t have had to work their childhood away if WE HADN’T BEEN SENT TO THE ISLE!

Dr Jiminy: Ma'am, calm dow-

Drizella *being held back by her husband, Hans* I AM CALM!

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Dr Jiminy: Hello, all my crickets. Today we have two very special guests. Mulan..... and SHANG!

*Mulan and Shang enter from behind the curtains and take a seat on the couch*

Dr Jiminy *shakes their hands* How ya doing Shang? Mulan. Lovely to see you again. Now it's come to my understanding that you want to do a DNA test on your youngest, Lonnie?

Shang: That's right.

Mulan *nods*

Dr Jiminy: May I ask why that is? You both seem rather calm about this considering most people only come for DNA tests when the topic of cheating is involved.

Mulan: Oh no, we're not here because he thinks I cheated.

Shang: Which, for the record, I don't believe.

Dr Jiminy: oh?

Mulan: Yeah, we're actually here because we want to shut down the rumors and weirdness around people not believing that Shang is Lonnie's father.

Dr Jiminy: O-oh. *mutters*   Well, that's a new one. *speaks up* Well, I have the results right here in this envelope. Are you ready?

Shang *grumbles* as ready as I'll ever be.

Mulan: More ready than I have ever been for anything else in my entire life.

*picture of Lonnie in her pjs in the kitchen, smiling pops up*

Dr Jiminy *opens the envelope * In the case of 16 year old, Li Lan-Lei (Lonnie), Shang.... you.. ARE THE FATHER!

Shang: I KNEW IT!

Crowd: OOOOOOOOOH!!!!!!!!

Mulan: WE TOLD YOU SO!

Crowd *looks sheepish*

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Dr. Jiminy: So, Mulan. Shang.

Mulan and Shang *exchange a tired look*

Dr. Jiminy *Doesn't notice and continues* We are here today so you can answer a very important question.

Shang *Impatient* Which is?

Dr. Jiminy: Why exactly did you name your kids Li Shang Jr and Lonnie instead of some more culturally appropriate names?

Mulan *side eyeing them* We did.

Dr. Jiminy *taken aback* What?

Shang *irritated* my wife said we did. Which you would know if anyone used their proper names.

Dr. Jiminy: What do you mean by that?

Mulan *also now irritated* Our children are named Shaiming and Lan-Lei. Not Li Shang Jr or Lonnie. That's just what their classmates and teachers call them.

Dr. Jiminy: Oh..

Shang *getting up* We're leaving now.

Dr. Jiminy: Wait. What—don't go—

Shang and Mulan *leave anyway*

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Dr. Jiminy: Is it true that you and Yao's daughter, Yi-Min, was actually born out of an affair?

Princess Mei *starts crying due to personal reasons*

Crowd: ooo-

Yao *takes off his shoe and lungs at Jiminy Cricket* why you no good son of- *the shoe flies out of his hand, hitting the camera and causing it to turn off*

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Dr Jiminy: Lady Tremaine, is it true that when you found out your grandson, Anthony, was dating Harriet, you called him a moron and her a hussy?

Lady Tremaine: It is and I would do it AGAIN!

*crowd gasps*

Harriet* runs out from behind stage* SAY THAT TO MY FACE, YOU BITCH!

Dr Jiminy: Uh oh. SECURITY!

Harriet *lunges*

Anthony *back stage, mortified and covering Dizzy's eyes* Note to self, never invite grandmother to Holiday gatherings.

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Dr Jiminy: Now, Queen Aurora. King Philip. What do you have to say against the accusations that have been leveled against you by your daughter?

Philip, defensive: Okay, so we weren't the most attentive parents but we aren't neglective!

Aurora, quiet: Neglective is a rather strong word for it.

Dr Jiminy: Then what would you call *checks notes* only seeing your daughter during holidays and big royal events?

Philip *dryly* Being a busy royal.

Crowd *starts booing*

Philip *stands up* WHY ARE YOU BOOING ME? I'M RIGHT!

Aurora: She was with family!

Dr Jiminy *looking disappointed* that doesn't make you any less neglective for not playing a bigger part in her life. She's your only child.

Crowd *booing louder and start throwing things*

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Dr Jiminy: Mr Clayton. Is it true that you shot at your son six times last month?

William Clayton: He's being a baby! It was only 3!I wouldn't waste that much amo on him in a month.

Clay *yelling from behind stage* You shot at me six times in one day once!

William: BECAUSE YOU WERE BEING ANNOYING! EVEN YOUR YOUNGER BROTHERS AREN'T THAT ANNOYING!

William's sister, Lady Waltham, busts out from behind the curtains: YOU WHAT?! I'LL KILL YOU!

William: oh shit *bolts*

Lady Waltham *chases him* GET BACK HERE AND TAKE YOUR PUNISHMENT LIKE A MAN!

Dr Jiminy: Oh dear.

Cash Clayton, 10: Should we stop her? Could we even stop her?

Clay, 18: GO AUNT MANDY! GO! KICK HIS ASS!

Wilson 'Will' Clayton, 12: I'll take that as a no...

------------------------------------------------------------

Narrator: Next time on Dr. Jimny, we will be finding out whether the rumors about Pinocchio and Alice's children are true—

*Photo of 13 year old Ally and 12 year old Pin flashes on screen*

—Whether or not Romeo 'Lampwick' Rossi, husband of Chief Tiger Lily, can be jealous and controlling—

*Audio-less video of Lampwick punching a guy flashes on screen*

—and whether or Queen Eilonwy Bluefairy of Llyr is cheating on her husband, Alexander Bluefairy, with Coach Reese Jenkins and her royal guard, Taran.

*Three separate photos of Queen Eilonwy with each of the aforementioned men flash on screen*

But until next time, this has been, Dr. Jiminy!

*Music starts playing* Guess who's back, guess who's back, Jiminy's back! Hey! *screen goes black*

[treasure-goblin]

🤍🖤🤎💜💙💚💛🧡❤

Cal!!!

Here's Fiorella!

Baby Bean's Other Parent!!!

(Ignore that I cooked this up on a picrew in like 5 minutes-)

And I would like to think that she really likes nature and anything in it, which is why they didn't put up THAT big a drama when requested to take care of Baby Bean :3

🤍🖤🤎💜💙💚💛🧡❤

Oooooooooh I love her!!

This is one i did for Roland, last nights sketch wasn't the best but I was tired and in pain lol /lh

Their hair is hard to do In picrews, because she typically has more color in their hair. He's not half bad in this one tho!

[fluffypotatey]

Leverage Ep 11 >:3

Pre-game thoughts:

ngl the last episode was a lot of fun! got to see Nate at his breaking point, Sophie being the best (as always), ALEC AND ELIOT DUO!!!!!

also it looks like this one focuses on Parker? (at least, that’s what the blurb says 🤷🏻‍♀️) so praying for more moments for my ot3 🥰 either as duos or altogether, I do not care. just want them to have screen time 

anyway, can’t really think of anything else to add???

I mean, this is the last episode before the 2-parter finale, so I’m curious if this will touch on…..the ✨insurance company✨and that uh Crowley-looking dude (unrelated to GO!Crowley, a show I should also watch)

BUT ENOUGH ABOUT THAT ON WITH THE SHOW ✨ 

Reaction:

ooooooh a flashback 👀

Ok that was not a safe dose

AHHHHHH THE STOVE

NOOOOOOOOO ERNESTO

is he dead?????

oooooooooh team drama 👀

lmaooooo parents (Nate/Sophie) using jury duty as a lesson

“Yeah, I know jury duty, this seems legit” <- has only gone once

OooooOOOoooooOoOooh defendant is wearing colored shades, he must be an asshole 😂

WAIT WHAT

WHO IS FILMING THE CASE???? IS THAT LEGAL????

babe, please step the fuck away from the jury panel. i would not be in favor of you anyways with you standing so close wtf

oop! she knows!!! fuck they’re gonna strike her out 

ok but seriously who are those camera people???? are they even a real legal team???? the ick is strong, I hope they burn this other team to the ground

YES PARKER

CONVINCE THEM

SHUT NATE YOU WERE A SLIMY INSURANCE MAN BEFORE YOU DONT GET TO TALK

everybody giving Nate the stink eye, yesssssssssss 

(You would think, with how much I yell at this man, I hate him, but tis the opposite! Love him. He’s just an asshole, and I would never like him in person, great character <3)

OMFG ALEC BACKSTORY??????

YES PLEASE

NANA YOU BADASS

ELIOT AND PARKER DUOOOOOO

FUCK YES

Lmao he took the beer

literally before clicking play I was like “you know, I don’t think Parker and Eliot have been a duo yet” AND HERE WE GO

ASK AND YOU SHALL RECEIVE

nO glasses guy 🫢 was a faker?! <- is not shocked

jfc Alec is good 😍

ok what you doing Parker? oh wait nvm 

Chess???? lmao you nerd

“Hmmmm how do we show an evil character is smart…..I KNOW! Chess!”

ohhhhhh big pharma ok (can’t believe it took me this long)

WAIT WE DOING POISONED APPLE

ugh no we’re not

oh shit bribery????

ELIOT PLAYS CHESS???? you fucking nerd 💕

lmao Parker gets a lesson in social interaction (I’m so sorry, girlie, I’d hate it too, but tbh I also befriended an older lady while at jury duty so same????)

it’s ok Parker you tried your best 🫂

“I have a peanut allergy” <- love you Alec 

Nate, I sure hope you don’t regret that honeypot plan

OHHHHHHHHH oh dear ok now the brownface comments make sense

Ok show’s age has been shown

jfc Sophie wtf please tell me this is the only episode where this happened 

“I’m very spiritual” <- 🤢 god how many times have I heard this

Jesus H Christ I can’t even look at her T^T

awwwww Sophie is helping Parker

ELIOT YOU ARE SO CUTE

HES TRYING

PARKER YOU CUTIE 🥰 

i want Parker and the grandma to be friends. Like best friends

lmaooooooo she’s foreman now (I don’t think I spelled that right)

girlie, you sound like you’re giving the old man a job interview 😂

SHE GONNA BUY OUT THE LAWYER???? 

He won’t

Nate noooooooooo

ALEC

YES

MY BOY

HE LOOKS SO GOOD IN A SUIT

but also shit they are treading the legality there (<- she says even tho they do this every episode)

“Do you trust your government, Ms. Vargas?” ALEC 😂😂😂😂 bringing back the old teachings of being a Jehova Witness i see

WE ARE BARELY HALFWAY?????? (Sorry just looked at the time stamp  what do you mean it’s only been 20 minutes????)

“is that a high school yearbook?” oh my god

Alec, babe, love you, but what

ALEC I LOVE YOU

girlie you could say cauliflower steak

Awwwwwwwwwwww Parker has a friend 🤧🤧🤧🤧

Alec’s headshot is beautiful 

“It all checks out unless [says an example of exactly what Alec did]”

Ooooooh outsource mention 👀 

Nate there are cameras!!!!

“You know why they say, ‘Justice has a blindfold’? Because Justice is asleep” FUCKING DEAD

ok bro this isn’t jury duty anymore this is a trial???? did I miss the part where they finished jury selection 

OH SO HE’S AN ACTOR???

lmaooooo he was Scottish 

Awwwwwwwww Parker 🥺 “she likes rainy days” im fucking sobbing

Ok now that’s why we were only halfway 

“We win the trial” LETS FUCKING GOOOOOOOO

Hehe Alec has to actually win the trial

“You think lawyers aren’t just pretending and trying to fill in daddy’s shoes” ok, uh, wow 💔 

SHE GOT A BAG LUNCH 🥺🤧

Eliot on another parents trip!!!

wait who is he fighting???? Oh ok

Nate, you look so fucking dumb 😂

*gasp* THAT MEDICAL MAN IS LYING FIGHT HIM ALEC

oh ho ho! bringing up his qualifications I see 👀 why he now only doing cases in Cali 👀

OH HO 👀

HE BROUGHT UP BIN LADEN 👀

GET HIS ASS ALEC! FUCK HIM UP!!! FUCK! HIM! UP!

Alex’s closing statement 👀 omg 🥺 yes babe 🤧 beautiful 💐 take my flowers 💐💐💐💐💐

jfc I’m nervous!!!! I know this will end happy but still!!!! So nervous 🫠

nooooo, she must not figure out 🫠

Oh dear, 

OH YES THEY TURNED OFF THE TV WONDERFUL

lol yesssss girlie, burn that fucking bridge!!!! BURN THE BRIDGE!!!! DIG THAT HOLE!!!!

unrelated but her jacket is super pretty

ok ok here we go. fuck I’m nervous 

YESSSSS LETS GO BITCH

FUCK YEAH MESS WITH THEIR CAMERA

why are you revealing yourself to her????? bro she could find people to get you!!!!

OMG SHE MADE A FRIEND! GET THAT COFFEE

Final Thoughts:

this episode was so much fun!!!! we may not have gotten much of the Parker/Eliot duo but I’m still happy that they got to tag-team! Parker learning how to socialize, be a team player, and lead was just 👌👌👌👌👌👌 wonderful so proud of her T^T Alec was amazing (obviously) and fucking killed both for stalling the case and winning it <3

not as much Nate/Sophie moments besides them acting like parents to their teammates and being a well-oiled machine 😎 so I’m still satisfied! a little disappointed that there wasn’t any hint for the finale but that might just be because of the messed up order again 😔 

overall: wonderful episode, this might be my favorite of the season (tho Miracle Job still has my heart)

[waitmyturtles]

Thanks for answering my ask.....if you don't mind me asking (again), who are your favorite romantic relationship's couples in books/ manga/ anime/movies/tv series (can be canon or non-canon)? Why do you love them? Sorry if you've answered this question before......Thanks....

Ooooooh, @elaine2895! You ask the good questions!

Shippy ship ship ships.... I'll list just five, if you don't mind, and some of them will be repeats from the character list I put together yesterday.

The majority of the couples below reflect a factor that I look for the most in dramas. My top three couples exist in their dramas beyond the initial courtship, beyond the first kiss. I like to see couples struggle, deal with problems, work things out. Even in T8S -- we saw an initial encounter, and then saw problems, and then saw the guys work out their problems. What we didn't see in T8S were the problems being worked out INSIDE of the relationship. But we got to see that in the other shows I mention below. I always want to see commitments being strengthened. That's the kind of maturity I look for in shows.

(That being said: She Loves to Cook and She Loves to Eat is still being written. So who knows what kind of commitment we might see from that dear ship down the road.)

1) Shiro x Kenji/What Did You Eat Yesterday (Kinou Nani Tabeta) -- always and forever my favorite ship. I'm a middle-aged mom. Seeing a couple well into their relationship, and managing their lives and tribulations after years of commitment, is something I want to see in most of my dramas/doramas, QLs or otherwise. I loved the maturity of this show, and this unbelievable couple was the concrete center of the show working fabulously.

2) Adachi x Kurosawa/Cherry Magic -- god, Cherry Magic. The television series was fun and campy. The movie just tore me apart -- it went deep into a kind of emotional switch between Kurosawa and Adachi. While the series had Kurosawa pursuing Adachi, the movie had Adachi emotionally holding Kurosawa down, facing the pressures from their families, facing long distance between them, all of which unsettled Kurosawa, usually the confident and suave perfectionist. I LOVED this emotional switching between the two of them -- as they found their balance with each other. Thinking about their power between each other makes me swoon.

3) Pat x Pran/Bad Buddy -- I couldn't help myself as I was writing this, I had to rewatch bits of episode 12 to remind myself of the utter relief I felt when I realized they had ended up together, despite the massive familiar pressures they faced to stay apart. I reblogged a gif of this yesterday, but the two parts that so move me about that final episode are: when they're looking at the picture board together and narrating the existence of their relationship, and admitting that it's not quite the happy ending that anyone would have expected; and the drinking game at the end, letting loose and being SO in love with abandon. BALANCE. These guys balanced each other out. When one moved away, the other moved closer. When one was down, the other lifted up. Their shared struggle together is something I think about literally every day.

4) Jae Won x Ji Hyun/The Eighth Sense -- I'm gonna go here! They're a new ship. But I love them. OOOOOH, JI HYUN'S SASSINESS! OOOOOOOOOH. The way the country mouse stopped mousing around and stood up for the man he wanted in Jae Won, while Jae Won spent weeks battling guilt and internal demons. Ji Hyun was so driven by love that he literally matured up to get his man. He knew Jae Won was in love with him -- Ji Hyun just had to help Jae Won clear the path. It was Ji Hyun's independent mind that got the ship to work, and I loved that we were able to see that literal internal change unwind over the course of the courtship.

5) Nomoto x Kasuga/She Loves to Cook and She Loves to Eat -- Lord, help me. The dorama and the manga -- some of the best food QL content ever. Nomoto is SPUNKY. She realizes she is queer, she has a deep and unwinding queer revelation -- and she's DAMN sure of it, and couldn't give a hoot about what anyone thinks about her falling in love with her next-door neighbor, Kasuga. And Kasuga knows, on their own end, what's up. Kasuga's not afraid to make things a little better to draw Nomoto into THEIR life. I love these two. In their dorama, we don't see a conclusion -- we only see Nomoto's queer awakening that she loves Kasuga. But the manga is still being written, and I have very high hopes that we'll see a loop closed in the near future.

Once again, thanks @elaine2895! These are fun to write!

[jawllines]

I LOVED BALLERINRRY THANK YOU LIV!!! I AM A SUCKER FOR OTHER WOMAN/MAN DRAMA AND I WAS THINKING MAYBE YN OR HARRY IS WALKING BY THE OTHERS DORM TO LIKE ASK TO HANG OUT OR PRACTICE AND THEY HEAR SOMEONE INSIDE AND IT SOUNDS LIKE THEYRE DOING SOMETHING AND IT DOESNT MAKE THE PTHEE MAD PERSAY MORE LIKE DRAWN BACK AND THE OTHER IS DESPERATELY TRYING TO MAKE THEM TALK. HOPE YOU UNDERSTOOD WHAT I JUST WROTE BECAUSE I FOR SURE CANT

OOOOOOOOOH OKAY YES! LOVE SOME DRAMA SOME JEALOUSY

[thewholedamnboulangerie]

hello friends it’s going incurably critically insane o’clock ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

THE FULL INTRO IS BACK OH WE LOVEEEEEE TO SEE IT

…Laia Costa is SO early in the cast credits WHAT DOES IT ALL MEAN

moiraine and lanfear………. powerful homoeroticism I really enjoyed it. I realise that this is not a very original statement but it’s the only one I have sufficient brainpower for rn

THE IMPLICIT POLY AOL VIBES IM GOING TO EAT MY ENTIRE ARM

THE BRAID???? HOLY FUCK RENNA NEEDS TO SUFFER TIMES ONE BILLION

GODDDDDDDD ISHAMAEL SETTING UP MAT TO KILL RAND IS SENDING ME FULLY AROUND THE TWIST

ohhhhh I knew it was coming but “you have always been my better” still made me literally cry 😭😭😭

ANSBCNSNSNDNFNFNGN THEY REALLY SAID WE ARE GOING TO HEIST THE HORN OF VALERE AND WE ARE GOING TO DO IT ENTIRELY OFFSCREEN. like okay I don’t like it but if we can’t have 10 episodes I do have to respect the sheer audacity of that Narrative Choice. though also: WHOMST was the lady from Cairhien. and of even greater importance: was she played by Laia Costa???????

(I assume it was ~Selene~ but like. we are in Laia Costa tunnel vision modus fuckin operandi)

oh Loial my BELOVED 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺

wait whatttttt no turok duel OR darkfriend reveal for Ingtar?????? bro we are speedrunning this city

“they were best friends” listen we know two out of the three were fucking so if we’re describing all three in the same way I will not be held responsible for the conclusions I draw tyvm

SIX OF THEM

SIX OF THEM

HEL FUCKING LO

ITS TIME FOR MORE FORSAKEN BABEYYYYY GOD I CANNOT WAITTTTTTTT TO SEE THE REST OF MY EVIL BLORBOS

(admittedly I’m only far enough through the books to have encountered Graendal a grand total of once thus far and also I don’t actually give much of a fuck about Sammael yet but oooooooh my god when Asmodean and Moghedien show up it WILL be over for me bitches)

wait omfg is Lanfear staging this entire drama as a distraction so she can release all the remaining forsaken while ishy and rand are too busy fighting each other to stop her oh fuck meeeeee I’m gonna go in ZANE

THE PHYSICAL RUSH OF ADRENALINE I FELT SEEING MAT MAKE A BLADED QUARTERSTAFF OUT OF THE DAGGER WHILE THE S1 TWO RIVERS MUSIC PLAYED MY GODDDDDDDD

IM JUST CONSTANTLY SCREAMING NOW FR

MAT IN THE SAME LOCATION AS THE HORN… HRRRRRRRRR

no sign of rand for a hot second 👀

HOLY FUCK EGWENEEEEEEEEE

HE’S GOT SHIT HAIR BUT HE’S ALIVE AJSNCNSNSNDNFNDJDNFNFNDJNDNDN

MAT WITH THE HORN THIS IS NOT A FUCKING DRILL

“…Two Rivers???” SPECTACULAR

NOOOOOOOOOO NONONONONO I KNEW IT WAS COMING BUT THIS IS STILL THE ABSOLUTE WORST

OH GOD OhH FUCK I RECOGNISE THE START OF THAT SCORE IM ABOUT TO GO FUCKING FERAL

MAT LEADING THE CHARGE WITH THE MANETHEREN BATTLE CRY OOOOOOOOOH GOD THATS MY FUCKING BOYYYYYYYYYYYYY

I SPY BIRGITTE!!!!! AHHHHHHH SHEEEEEEEEEE

UNO!! FUCK YES

nynaeve saying that egwene needs elayne not her… oh my god are we getting a full main babies towertop avengers assemble moment im gonna fucking evaporate

ALSO WE HAVENT SEEN MOIRAINE IN A HOT SECOND………. HMMMMMMM!!

I KNEW WHAT WAS GONNA HAPPEN OOOOOOOH I FUCKING KNEW IT AND I AM STILL. LOSING MY MINDDDDDDD

THE CRADLING. THE CRADLING. THERE IS A TRULY EXCEPTIONAL LEVEL OF HOMOEROTICISM HAPPENING HERE ON EVERY LEVEL

EGWENE’S BATTLE MUSIC OH MY GOD MY GIRL YESSSSSS GO NUCLEAR MY LOVE

SCREAMING AT THIS AVENGERS ASSEMBLE COMBINATION FATED SOULMATES FIRST MEETING CROSSOVER EVENT BUT WHERE THE FUCK IS AVIENDHA GET MY GIRL IN HERE!!!!!!!

SHRIEKINGGGGGGGG AT THE (almost) ENTIRE CREW BEING RIGHT BEHIND RAND IN HIS BIG MOMENT

OH GOD OH MY GOD ITS HER SHES FUCKING HERE

AHSBCBFB OKAY I HAD IT BACKWARDS BUT FUCKING SCREAM???????? THATS HERRRRRR THATS MY CREEPY PATHETIC BABYGIRL HOLY SHITTTTTTTTT

“All five of them” uh huh. uh huh. uh huh. any- any of them in particular??? perchance??? huh moggy???

AND CLOSING WITH A NEW VARIANT ON MAT’S THEME OHHHHHHH AND IF I SOBBBBBBB

[ramonahblog]

Review Ramble! 

Season two! Woo!

Spoilers for CBS Ghosts season two, episode one.

So it starts off recapping season one. Frankly I can’t be bothered to recap so you all are going to have to figure it out or just watch the show. 

Jay is hoping his bump on the head means he can also see ghosts. 

Well damn it. It was a cruel tease. Jay is hugging some random Living. Also he called everyone by name except Trevor who is stuck with No Pants lol. 

Random Living is a delivery guy. 

“Damn it,” - Jay. Appropriate, very appropriate. Poor guy just wants to see and interact with the ghosts! You know what? No one was using their powers so I’m holding on to my theory that Jay can see the ghosts but only when they use their power. 

Cue opening credits - WHY IS THERE A SWORD/KNIFE/DAGGER ON THE DESK NOW? WHICH GHOST DOES THAT REPRESENT? 

We’re not counting the guests from season one finale because they both left the B&B and left a scathing one-star review on yelp. Do people still use yelp? Did people actually use yelp? 

Nigel is at the manor, watching some show with Isaac, Hetty, Thor & Sas. He’s rather uncomfortable. 

Sas is the one encouraging direct communication. Guess the incoming B&B guests are intriguing enough. 

So the doorbell rings. 

Pete finds the guests suspicious and is going all detective on their asses. 

Meanwhile in the Shed, Isaac is attempting to persuade Nigel to come up to the manor.  Apparently there is Ant Drama in the shed. 

The British soldier that is Nigel’s ex (I’m not even going to try and remember his name, he’s Ex-Boy from now on) is still in the shed. Isaac is uncomfortable. 

Also cut to both Ex-Boy and the other one (Music Boy?) watching Nisaac. Oh, good for Isaac, he went direct and asked. 

Yeah, it’s two seasons in and I’m still horrible with names. 

It’s about Thor. Poor Thor. Although I’d probably be just as uncomfortable with Thor as Nigel IRL but I’m watching tv so who cares. 

Isaac mentions he will ask Thor to tone it down which isn’t going to end well, I can tell. 

Ooh, Ex-Boy is smarting at this scene. Considering the Drama he caused in the season one finale, is he going to cause more Drama? 

“And see what they’re doing,” - Trevor

“They’re like sixty,” - Sas 

Don’t age-and-kink-shame Sas. 

Alberta brings up the possibility of spying on the guests to ensure a good review and not for the ghosts' entertainment (but probably mostly for the ghosts’ entertainment). Jay is against this idea.  Sam pretends to agree but then goes to Alberta’s plan. 

Oh return of the Basement Ghost that pretended to be Pete’s GF that one time. She’s come up to say Thor is in the basement and ruining the mood. 

Lol “British Boy Toy” from Basement-Ghost. Excellent. Can she stay upstairs? 

Ooh, Sas is demanding Isaac to apologize for Does Oskar-the-Squirrel have BFF competition? 

Isaac is refusing because the thing with Nigel is new.

Well, Hetty at least thanked Basement Ghost. Progress for Hetty!

Meanwhile with Spying, Jay ended up putting it together. 

So the show the other ghosts are watching brings up loyalty to friends. Sas and Hetty are pretty much passive-aggressively guilt-tripping Isaac. 

You know what, the conflict wasn’t as bad as I thought it’d be. 

Omg Thor likes watching ants as well. These boys are bonding. YAY BONDING!

And I forgot about the Complaining Guests. Oops. 

“Tom and Debbie suck,” - Jay who said it so passionately. Also Alberta agrees and we all know Alberta is always right. 

Oh Trevor has rushed in to say they don’t like Sam’s perfume (and he doesn’t agree with them). Backstory for perfume: Sam’s mum gave it to her before she passed and there’s only a little amount left so Sam uses it sparingly. 

Jay was already upset at the constant negativity to Sam but now he’s mad. 

Jay is marching out. What is he going to do? 

“And her voice is mellifluous,” - Jay. Did he finish a crossword puzzle again?

The guests have got to be wondering how Jay and Sam know about their complaints. 

Oooooooooh, it turns out the guests thought the yelp reviews were anonymous. Omg the other review that Jay-and-Sam read was the wife’s sister’s place. Omg. 

Okay, the guests left five-star reviews and claimed that their yelp account was hacked. Jay asks if this will be the last time Sam uses the ghosts behind his back - so is that going to be an oncoming plot thread? Who knows? 

Now excuse me, I’m off to read that fic of Nigel and Thor watching ants.

[lilacs-stash]

"no discriminations on the hate crimes committed against the community"

means I don't care if they're having heated arguments, if they're breaking their friendships and meeting the heavy bumps against the road as long as they're still in a way with each other

I'm in for them platonically, romantically, in angst and in fluff

ambiguous bastards /aff

watching the whole nickloon community fall apart for the drama and diatribe /pos

Oooooooooh. That makes sense.

[enderspawn]

I open tumblr

I see c!techno discourse

I close tumblr

[gunsatthaphan]

@ gun_atthaphan: 💦☀️💦

[marvelousse]

Alright MOAs how we feeling?

[vanilla-vivillon]

"we're exes and we meet again" maybe?

Oooooooooh interesting!!! I decided to do a Genya Safin x David Kostyk one because I haven’t done that yet for some reason

Also college AU yes please.

Genya Safin knows what she wants

And what she wants is to get through her studies

Become a plastic surgeon

Support her friends

Maybe get a cat

What she doesn’t want is to meet her high school ex at a party

She doesn’t want to talk with him for hours

She doesn’t want to relive the hurt

But the universe never does care for what we want does it

“C’mon Nazyalensky it will be fun!” Nikolai was trying to convince Zoya to come to the party he was throwing in his dorm

Nikolai was throwing a party to celebrate the start of there third year at Stanford

“Nikolai there is a lot of studying we should be doing instead of drinking our cares away” Zoya shot back

“Genya, love, please knock some sense into Zoya?”

“It could be fun, plus the school year started two weeks ago. No profesor is going to assign a big test anytime soon” Genya said

“You have never met Proffesor Baghra” Zoya said Speeding up

They were all walking to the dormitories together

Zoya was studying law. She wants to be a lawyer

“Are you really gonna let some old hag with a stick up her ass ruin your fun?” Genya retorted stopping in front of them

After a long pause zoya finnally relents and says “Fine. I’ll go, but for you, that way your not stuck with Alina and Mals drama”

Ever since Alina started screwing the professor with the the dreamy dark eyes and looked far to good to ever be a professor, mal had been insufferable

Flashing his million dollar smile Nikolai turned towards Zoya “I knew you would see sense”

“Now leave my sight before I change my mind” Nikolai sped off towards his dorm no doubt to finish preparations for tonight

Genya typically enjoyed parties

Cool people, cool music, cool boys

The list went on

Reapplying her deep red lipstick Genya turned towards her roommate Alina

Alina Starkov was a foster kid bouncing around homes in a small town, Keramzin.

She and her friend Mal felt so out of place in California

Genya helped her a lot in the first year and after some drama in there second year friendship was finally back on track

“Okay how do I look?” Genya asked giving a little spin

She chose a short red dress with a black leather jacket and thigh high black boots

“You look Perfect” Alina complimented finishing up on her own eyeliner

“Of course I do”

Alina laughed that fluttery sound that had become far to rare these days

“Listen Alina, I’m worried about you”

Alina took a pause before answering “I’m fine Genya”

“Alina you’re sleeping with your professor”

“So what!” Alina snapped “We’re both adults! Besides I don’t want to talk about this tonight, let’s just go to the party”

Genya let out a sigh

Sometimes Alina could be the most stubborn woman on earth

“Fine”

Loud music was blaring through the speakers Nikolai borrowed from Mal

Genya was socializing with some of her friends

While Genya did like parties the constant people was always a little stressful for her

So after giving some dating advice Genya went to go grab some beer

Pouring it Genya reflected

She was doing well in her classes, most of her friends were okay, she personally didn’t have a cat but across the hall from her is some dude Harshaw who did

one thing was missing

Him

Journals and glasses and caramel candies

Genya had been in love once in her life

And it’s seemed once was all she would ever get

“Oh sorry!” Genya exclaimed accidently spilling beer on someone

Looking up she lost her breath

There he was

All brown hair and wide eyes and sunkissed skin

And all the memories came crashing back

Geny first fell in love with him in the sixth grade

Well not love really

More like awe.

Back then he was really into legos

He built this giant airplane that Genya thought was so cool

But they first talked in seventh grade

They were partners in a group project

David hadn’t been very interested in Genya then

But Genya even then loved the way his brain worked

But she never said anything

In there sophomore year of high school after years of being friends Genya finally got the courage and told him her feelings

David was so suprised then he had to leave the room and come back two minutes later to say he reciprocated her feelings

They started dating and were inseparable

Whenever David had been pulling an all nighter on some new idea she would go over to his house and bring him some Carmel candies

Whenever she raved on about this new surgery technique he would listen and give her that soft beautiful smile he rarely showed anyone

But there happiness came crashing down in senior year

David was going to go to MIT all the way in Massachusetts while Genya wanted to go to Stanford in California since she was a kid

At first they were going to do long distance

But it didn’t work out

They both got busy

And didn’t talk

And Genya hated having a boyfriend who was never there

There was never some big fight

Never some big cheating scandal

One day Genya posted a picture of her on a date with the cute classmate who winked at her and that was that

They never saw each other again

But that might change tonight where she met those impossible chocolate eyes again

“What are you doing here?” Genya said after her shock

“Genya, I…. I live here” David said stuttering

Clearly he was just as suprised as she was

“Hey Genya you meet my new roommate David!” Suddenly Nikolai appeared “He just transferred from MIT”

Transferred

He transferred

David Kostyk transferred to Stanford

The one who got away was standing right in front of her

“Do you two know each other?” Nikolai asked sensing the tension

Ignoring him, Genya said “would you like to talk outside?”

After knowing David for years Genya knew she should probably initiate conversation

David gave a slow nod ignoring his roommate’s bewildered face

Walking outside they turned to each other again

He had gotten cuter if that was even possible

“So…. You transferred?” Genya attempted to start talking

“MIT was great, but it felt kinda isolating. So when Nikolai suggested transferring… I took him up on the offer”

Oh

Oh

That made sense

David always had a hard time making friends

In high school Genya practically had to force him into her friend group

It mustve be hard all alone

Genya was the opposite

Although all through elementary school she was ruthlessly bullied and sophomore year of college was complicated, she had always been able to make friends

“Well I’m glad your here now” Genya said looking away to hide her blush

“I think I’m glad to”

David and Genya talked the whole night

About there studies and friends

Genya couldn’t way to introduce him to Alina

They had a lot in commmon

Things between the two weren’t perfect

But then again in matters of the heart it never was

Genya wasn’t sure of what she wanted

But if she had a Carmel loving genius by her side she might be able to be okay with that

Omg it’s finally done. This has to be one of the most difficult things I’ve written. I didn’t enjoy it at all but I’m really glad I went through with it. Thank you @ninamorozova and @confused-as-all-hell for encouraging me to complete this.

Thank you @wafflesandschemingfaces for the prompt

If yall really like this I might make a part two with David’s perspective

Please reblog. Likes are nice but te logs actually help

My ask box is open and I take any Grishaverse requests