#or having a major major breakdown

[system-of-a-feather]

Bro, Riku's dragging me out to do some actual further research and solidify my general thoughts on shit cause we have a gynecology appointment to talk about getting the hysterectomy we were considering before but ALSO bring up possible bottom surgery as a proper discussion and we've been putting it off cause personally thinking about that shit in any serious manner even briefly just makes me fucking sick with dysphoria cause we really have like the FAR end of severe dysphoria in terms of bottom dysphoria as far as all trans communities and resources I see talking about coping with it goes and I'm just like

Literally pausing a fucking 8 minute video half way through to take a music break cause this shit fucking hurts on such a visceral level. Like shits like a near OHKO in terms of psychological damage man. I'm built like a tank on physical damage and most emotional damage things but I'm literally like a boss with a GIANT RED weak point on my head when it comes to my own brain at itself.

Like I don't mind mentioning it online cause like, I literally don't have an issue with people bringing it up at me if they aren't my partner but good god I'm like this one thing just fucking OHKOs the tank of a pain endurer that I am.

-XIV

[poorly-drawn-mdzs]

I'm a doctor, not a miracle worker.

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[dailyloopdeloop]

DAY 75: onehat

[puppetmaster13u]

Prompt 248

Jason… wasn’t exactly planning on going back to Gotham.

Oh sure, back when he’d first gotten his head fixed up by the Pits and then utterly fucked by them he had been planning on a convoluted thing of revenge and getting Bruce to kill the joker and honestly he’s barely not doing that. But a literal six year old declaring your plan was stupid was downright insulting, even if they were correct. 

But he’s not going to drag this out. He’s only here for a few days, just enough to take care of things with a couple of Shadows loyal to Talia- and therefor him as well- before Damian is sent over. It was a thing he had argued with her for hours, the whole sending Damian here, but… But it was something Damian wanted, and well, she was paying for college for him. So. 

So Joker would die, would never get a chance to hurt his baby brother. It wouldn’t be his first kill- he didn’t regret his previous ones, not when the blood would have been on Damian’s hands instead- but hopefully it would be his last. 

[feelingtheaster99]

When Kristen cuts in with, “But where does that leave ME?” was a moment of PEAK COMEDY

[abrahamvanhelsings]

and kudos to van helsing for NOT putting the blame on mrs westenra and instead saying "we can't tell her how close lucy is to death and so she did what she thought was best for her daughter but in doing so unknowingly endangered both her life and soul"

[yuri-for-businesswomen]

the worst thing about having been traumatised and abused is knowing the men responsible are still out there, probably hurting other women, and they dont even think they did anything wrong. it kills me

[vaugarde]

"oughhh you can't like carmine, she's abusive, she says 'its not like i hit him' in one scene so she's toxic and bad and you shouldn't portray her in a sympathetic light!!!" speaking as someone who genuinely has a toxic relationship with his older brother... shut up lmao

[who-the-fuck-knows-blog]

i put a ton of tags on a thing and realized maybe i should just make a post because i wanna know what other ppl think…

thinking about how if izzy had continued/forced his confession onto ed would've gone bc with eds mental state probably backing off on it and being more vague was a good choice. when izzy confesses ed is at his lowest and fully unable to accept that someone loves him and that he can love someone else and ed might have used violence to reenforce these beliefs.

ed dismissing it was probably the best outcome for izzy at that point because if ed was convinced that it was true (although i suspect he did believe that bc he shot izzy to kill the love) i'm not sure what he would have done to end that love.

i’m also thinking about the scene where ed is sobbing and playing with the wedding toppers after having shot izzy. i'm not sure when ed realized that izzy wasn't dead but if he had before that time an aspect of that breakdown could have been him grieving izzys love for him because he did think izzy stopped after the gunshot. which is why he went to izzy to be killed he thought “well, izzys done it for me before and there's no way he still loves me so he will be willing to kill me”

[sharkinlovewithadolphin]

it's a good day to be painfully reminded of the fact that Haru started running towards Rin before the barriers had even fully opened <3

[killyourrdarlingss]

"But, you changed him too..."

[babykittenteach]

2023 in review! I made an effort to try more things and it worked mostly (at least for TV and movies). New things, new-to-me things, and new installments of old things all had characters to love even if I didn't necessarily feel fannish about them, and I'm hoping 2024 does, too.

[3416]

this.....

[im-a-lil-bitch-boi]

my mom: ur not autistic, stop

also her: describes aspects of my childhood that r v obvious signs of autism

[fitzrove]

Its ok maybe if you look up the lyrics to was für ein grausames leben and read them in english you will be okj<3

[anistarrose]

I've actually been incredibly productive writing recently (like, well over 3k words every week ever since the seasonal depression started letting up), but this has had no visible effect on my fic output yet because the types of things I'm writing are also getting thousands of words longer. and I simply cannot post start posting chapters before the whole thing is done, because of the way my brain works.

anyways, this is all to say apologies in advance for when I finally drop this multichapter monster on you and one of the individual chapters itself is over 10k. I broke up the original premise into a multichapter when it hit a mere 6k, but that's trick's not gonna work again, because of this chapter's Themes, and also Parallels, to say nothing of Symmetries. so thanks in advance for your patience, because at some indeterminate point in the future, I'm gonna need it