#or if she went to a trade school i could see her being an auto mechanic

[faith-thee-slayer]

okay so hear me out: if faith was introduced in S3 as the same age as dawn at the time (so 11-12), they’ve would’ve been absolute besties. i’m imagining a scenario where faith and her parent(s) moved to sunnydale. she wouldn’t have been a slayer yet, she’d just be a sad awkward little girl. dawn already felt like the outcast of her family so they’d be two peas in a pod. i think she’d understand faith in a lot of the ways buffy didn’t. and she’d offer her a place to stay when it wasn’t safe for faith to go home. they’d be attached at the hip for years, and then maybe have a sort of difficult phase where dawn felt self-conscious because faith became the “more attractive friend” and got all the attention from guys. this would coincide with S5 and dawn’s paranoia about being “something horrible” in everyone’s eyes (which faith could very much relate to). then when buffy jumped off the tower in the end, i’m thinking about the absolute chaos that would ensue when faith suddenly developed her powers and had to follow in buffy’s footsteps (assuming kendra hadn’t already been called before). that would really be the test of their friendship -- whether faith and dawn could still be there for each other in the aftermath, with dawn grieving and faith learning how to be the slayer (oh my god imagine little faith training with the buffybot). maybe they’d be each other’s inspiration to graduate high school and they’d be college roomies like buffy and willow...

[elsanna-shenanigans]

August Contest Submission #6: The Burdens of Winning

Words: ca. 6,000 Setting: mAU Lemon: No CW: None

The bus rounded the corner and there they were, the Olympic rings, practically gleaming in the sunlight as if welcoming the busloads of athletes to the world stage. Elsa kept her earbuds in and didn’t move from her seat like so many of the others, whipping out their phones and snapping photos and selfies, crowding the far side of the bus. The trainers and coaches turned a blind eye. There was a pandemic and they should stay apart, but the joy was good for morale and in turn, good for winning. After a few minutes, the athletes settled back into their seats. The energy remained alive, buzzing. Elsa could hear the excited chatter through her music. She sighed heavily and pulled her hood up before leaning her head against the window.

They had been in Tokyo for who knows how many days now. Time outside the pool blended together into a blur. All Elsa knew was that the opening ceremony was tonight and she was being forced to attend. Somewhere in there was a series of interviews and promos as well. The burden of being the female face of the national swim team was heavy and exhausting. Each medal she won, each record she broke, the media demanded more. She hated every moment in front of a camera.

She adjusted her goggles and stepped up onto the block. The entire team was here, practicing. If she was nostalgic, she would have thought of the good old days, being in school, always practicing as a team, the water forever choppy with the various strokes and kicks. But she had no time for that and she actively chose to ignore how lonely her professional training really was. The accumulation of years of practice, countless laps, hours of training in the water, and even more outside of it.

To her right a coach was shouting at various swimmers, calling them by their names. She didn’t bother to meet them or get to know them. A few familiar faces and names, sure, but she didn’t know them really. A lot of the team wouldn’t even qualify into the finals with her, a friendship would just be a distraction and another disappointment in a long line of disappointments.

A whistle blew somewhere to her left, it wasn’t her coach so she remained poised on the starting block. A tall man with wide shoulders entered the water nearly perfectly. He was this year’s star swimmer. He didn’t necessarily win every world event with a gold medal, but he made the podium and the media was desperate for a new face after Phelps hung up his speedo.

Mr. Golden Boy, that’s what Elsa called him in her head. She knew only knew people by their swimming events and times and only if they competed against her. She didn’t know their hobbies, their relationships, their families. A lot of them hung out outside of practice. But she didn’t understand how they had the time. So she just referred to them by nicknames she made up in her head. It was easier, hands-off.

“Take your mark” Elsa’s coach shouted, and she gripped the edge of the block and tensed her muscles. A short burst of a whistle and Elsa was launching forward like a spring.

The water was cold and clear, a mild taste of chlorine crept past her tightly pressed lips but she kept her head tucked between her arms and kicked with both feet. Surfacing in one fluid motion, she broke into her stroke. It was a good dive but it could be better. She swam to the opposite end of the pool and hopped out with ease.

“I want to run the start again,” Elsa said to her coach.

“And I want you to practice your turns, so we’ll do one more dive. Then I don’t want to see you out of this damn pool until our time here is done.” His mouth was covered with a mask but his furrowed brow and bulging neck vein were all too visible.

Elsa took the disposable mask from the volunteer nearby and walked back to the opposite end of the large pool.

“…I reckon I’ll wear the mirrored ones, they’ll look way cooler.” somehow, through all the commotion and noises in the aquatic center, a single voice, with a thick Australian accent broke through.

Elsa looked and saw her rival, Anna Harding standing in the hallway behind the empty stands. She didn’t notice Elsa as she was talking with someone, gesturing wildly with her hands. She was a good distance away and Elsa couldn’t hear what she was saying. How that once sentence broke through, she’ll never know, but it annoyed her.

“Anderson! How hyped are you to be here?” Mr. Golden Boy shouted, he jogged up to walk next to her and waited for a beat for her to answer, never once dropping his wide all-too-white smile. “It’s the Olympics! Show, like, a smidge of emotion.”

“I’ve been here before, I’ll be here again,” Elsa responded, further annoyed now. The two of them had done several interviews together and now the man thought they were friends.

“I like that attitude but dude, live in the moment a bit alright?” He started to lean to nudge her arm but pulled back. Instead, he gave a quick nod and jogged away.

Elsa took her mask off and dropped it in the bin before climbing back on the block and starting the process all again.

No distractions.

~~~

“And it looks like… YES it’s Anderson with the Women’s 400m gold medal! Followed close behind by Australia’s Harding with the bronze going to…”

Elsa stopped listening to the announcers, their voices faded into a sea of various voices in just as many languages. She raised her arm and waved to the cameras. A smile never once crossing her face. A movement to her left caught her attention and she saw the Australian swimmer reaching across the lane rope to shake her hand. Elsa took it and heard the announcers erupt with approval.

“Good on ya mate, I’ll get you in the next one,” Anna said through short breaths.

“I’d like to see you try,” Elsa mumbled as she made her way to the designated exit area on the side. Once out of the pool she was directed to the media ally for various interviews without being given a moment to catch her breath.

A quick glance over and she saw Anna staying with the bronze place winner, talking to a camera.

“Solo or group?” someone was asking her, gesturing towards the camera.

“Solo.” 

~~~

The time between races was long, filled with eating, sleeping, or practicing. Which was normal. The painful part, the one Elsa hated was the time between suiting up and lining up to race. Because of the virus, everything was spaced apart, even the swimmers’ individual entrances took a long time.

Most of the women chatted amongst their teammates or spoke to international friends to pass the time. And a few others, like her, remained seated, hood pulled up and headphones on to block the noise and distraction.

“What’s in your ears?”

Elsa looked up and saw Anna staring at her, she had pulled a chair over and was sitting backward in it. Her chin resting on the chair’s back. Between her mask and swim cap, only her eyes were visible. They seemed to pierce right through Elsa and she didn’t like how that made her feel.

“Oy, blondie, did ya hear me?” Anna asked again tilting her head slightly.

Elsa let out a heavy sigh and took one earbud out. “Can I help you?”

Anna leaned back and held both hands up. “Whoa mate, I’m just tryin for some small talk. You can put down the eye daggers.”

“I’m trying to focus for the race.”

“Ah, I’ll leave you be then. Don’t want to be beating you when you’re distracted.” She stood up and spun her chair around before sitting back down, her back now to Elsa.

 “You and your stupid yellow cap aren’t going to beat me,” Elsa mumbled under her breath as she put her earbud back in.

~~~

“Australia takes the gold! A disappointing loss for Team USA’s Anderson”

Elsa huffed, stared at the scoreboard, refusing to believe the time she was seeing. Anna had beat her and set a new World Record. This was impossible, Anna had never beaten her before.

“Did say I’d get ya in the next one,” Anna said, beaming for the cameras and reaching her hand across to shake. Elsa took it begrudgingly.

Elsa exited the pool and auto-piloted to the media ally. She was stopped by the first news crews, stuffed into a tiny square, they all were wearing masks and face shields. Their eyes seemed to bore into Elsa as a microphone on a pole was shoved towards her face.

“How does it feel to break a world record and clinch the Gold Medal?” The reporter asked.

“It feels amazing! It was such a good race.” Anna said. Elsa somehow didn’t notice her presence before now. “I’ve been working on this for such a long time and to do it here on the Olympic stage is just incredible”

“And Elsa, how does it feel to just narrowly miss the gold and have your long-standing record shattered?”

Elsa shifted into her public face, swallowing down the astounding amount of cuss words that threatened to escape. “I’m thankful to be here to witness history. Harding is a great swimmer, I’m honored to be able to compete against her.”

“The two are set to face off more times over the next few days, I know the folks at home are excited to see the battle for gold.”

The next half an hour went on like this, short interviews with various media outlets from all over the world. Anna’s home country of course got a longer time slot. The entire time Anna walked with Elsa, seemingly refusing to do any interviews solo. It irritated Elsa as she was not able to dip into the locker room and had to do a painfully slow walk of shame through the cameras.

~~~

Elsa slammed into the wall, hard, a wave of water followed after her, splashing, turbulent, and violent. It matched how she felt as she glanced up at the scoreboard and saw her name in first and Anna’s in second. She nearly smiled. But it wasn’t worth smiling when she failed to beat the world record.

And there Anna was once again, reaching across the lane rope to shake her hand. And there too was Anna walking with her down the media ally. Ignoring Elsa’s request to go solo. And the media ate it up, two rivals trading golds and silvers back and forth. It was the perfect sports story.

The next two races ended with Elsa receiving a silver medal. She would be lying if she said she was mad at Anna for beating her both times. The other girl was nothing but kind and supportive. Always taking the time to shake the other swimmer’s hands or hug her teammates when they did well.

It seemed Anna, like Elsa, was her country’s star female swimmer. Just like Elsa, she too couldn’t swim a heat, not even a medal race, without the media stopping her for interviews. These interviews often involved Elsa joining, Anna’s presence next to her was very calming. Anna was a natural at handling the questions, laughing when she needed to, never talking bad about the officials or other swimmers. The more the two of them did interviews together, the more Elsa was able to better play off of Anna. She became more engaged, more relaxed.

The second the pair went their separate ways in the locker room, was the moment all the anger and resentment came bubbling back up in Elsa. She was mad at herself, she was starting to become distracted. She often found herself looking for Anna in the ready room before a race. And she hated how once she found her and Anna gave her a smile and maybe a little wave, she would have a strange feeling wash over her.

Elsa never had time for friends or love, if that’s what this feeling was. She ripped her cap off, pulling a few strands of hair with it, and stepped into the shower, letting the warm water wash off the chlorine and the complex feelings.

~~~

The aquatics center was darker now. It was later in the evening, the media and few spectators had all gone home. Only the lights on the pool and the emergency lights in the stands were on. It gave the place an almost eerie feeling. There were a few other swimmers here, each with their own lane. She was assigned to lane 1, she despised the wall but with the virus raging she had no grounds to argue. There was a small bin with her name and country flag on it. She managed to get two hours, probably due to the late hour. 

Elsa stepping up onto the block and dove in. She came out of the water as if sprinting but quickly slowed her pace. She needed to work her muscles, not strain them.

She fell into a practice rhythm, stroke, stroke, stroke… breathe, stroke. Her legs ever so slightly kicking, she wasn’t worried about her legs, she could turn them on and power forward when needed. It was her arms she was worried about, she made stroke adjustments, high elbow, cupped hands, trying to see what felt right.

As desperately as she tried to focus on the push and pull of the water, her mind wandered away. Maybe she should have tried to befriend some of her teammates. A flip turn. Anna seemed to be having so much fun. Stroke, stroke, breathe. But fun was distracting, and she needed to focus. Stroke, stroke, breathe. No distractions. Another flip turn. Why did her mind keep going to Anna? Stroke, stroke, breathe.

Elsa slowed her pace as she came back to the wall in the deep end of the pool. She had long since lost track of her laps. She left her body slow to a stop and reached up to hold onto the wall.

She exhaled and glanced up at the scoreboard where the clock was. Only 20 minutes had passed. It felt like 2 hours, she was defiantly distracted and it was affecting everything. Her strokes felt off, her mind was clouded. She pushed off the wall and dipped below the surface, letting her body drift down till her feet made contact with the bottom of the pool and her ears popped from the pressure. It was quiet down here. She could look over and see the bodies of other swimmers going back and forth in the other lanes. And all around the bottom of the pool were underwater wires and cameras. They sat dormant now, powered down until the next race.

Elsa kicked off the bottom, surfacing to splashes and kicks and soft voices that carried through the cavernous aquatic center.

“Oh hey, fancy seeing you here.”

Elsa looked up and saw Anna sitting cross-legged on the pool deck of the lane next to hers. She was in a loose-fitting swimsuit, like the type of one-piece suit someone might wear to the beach. Her caps were missing, instead, her long red hair hung freely around her shoulders, she was spinning her goggles around one finger.

“Can I help you?” Elsa responded, already annoyed that the person who was beginning to occupy so much brain space was now a few feet from her.

“Actually, I reckon I can help you,” Anna replied, the ghost of a smirk on her face.

“And how do you propose you can help me?”

“Ah,” Anna put her goggles on, “because I’ve beaten you in the last two races? And we’ve been neck and neck in the others.” In one fluid motion, she slipped into the pool.

Elsa felt like she was seeing red, and it wasn’t just the flowing red locks of the person in the lane next to her.

Anna surfaced laughing, which only further annoyed Elsa. To be so arrogant and to rub it in her face too was taking it too far. “Sorry, I’m just joshing ya. No hard feelings mate.”

There was a pause, a shaky exhale, and Anna added, more softly, “You know I really admire you.”

Now Elsa felt like someone punched her and she was stunned into silence. What was this girl’s deal? Was this some new form of emotional warfare?

“We’ve been swimming against each other for a long time. And maybe it’s the pressure of your third Olympics, maybe it’s all the bull shit from the virus but you’re not you lately.” Anna continued.

Who was Anna to know who Elsa was or wasn’t? Elsa let herself sink slightly so her mouth was just under the surface but she could still breathe through her nose as she tread water. A smarter person would have probably just ignored Anna and continued swimming. But Elsa found herself anchored in place.

“I’m sure you’re questioning why I, of all people, am floating here telling you this. But to me, our rivalry only exists for those seconds when we’re in the water. Outside of that, I think you’re a great swimmer and a good role model. I would like to be your f-friend.”  Anna turned away from her for a second, seemingly distracted by whatever the swimmer in lane five was doing.

“Friend?” Elsa repeated slowly as if trying the word out for the first time.

Anna turned back to her, her head tilted slightly to the side. “Yes, a friend, a mate, a buddy, a pal. Forgive me if I’m wrong, but you don’t seem to have many.”

“I uh…” Elsa started “I don’t have time for friends, I have to focus on swimming.”

Anna lifted a hand out of the water and pointed at Elsa, “Well, as your new friend, that’s the first thing we’re going to work on.”

Elsa really should have restarted her laps and ignored Anna. And she really, really should ignore this excitement that was bubbling in her chest. She couldn’t remember the last time she had a friend, and not someone who she was doing a press tour with or someone who wanted something from her. Then again, maybe Anna wanted something from her too.

But if Elsa was truly, deeply honest with herself, whatever Anna wanted in that moment, she wanted to give it to her. Anna had a pull, a gravity about her and Elsa was trapped in her orbit.

“Alright let me lay it out for you. You do have time for friends because they’re good, help lift you up and motivate you. You, my friend, have completely forgotten why you started swimming in the first place.”

“What? No, I haven’t, I’m still winning.”

“Yea nah, see the fact that you responded that way shows I’m right.”

Elsa frowned but remained where she was.

“So tell me, Elsa, back when you were a kiddo, why did you start swimming?” Anna lifted her goggles up and two ocean blue eyes seemed to penetrate right through Elsa’s shell.

Behind her own mirrored goggles, Elsa closed her own eyes. Shutting the world and Anna out for a moment. Why did she start swimming? It felt like eight lifetimes ago. She really had to dig deep, fuzzy memories of kids playing in the pool. Games of Marco Polo and mermaids. Joining the summer team, playing cards between races. Laughing. She had fun. Before she was scooped up into the USA Swimming training program.

She remembered now, how quickly everything changed. No more summer league, training every day for hours. Before she used to smell of bubble-gum then she shifted and everything was chlorine. Her friends moved on without her.  The clashing of worlds when they could no longer relate to each other. The girls got into makeup and she got into tight-fitting racing suits. The boys started playing Halo and she sat to be measured for custom goggles. After a while, all she had was the pool and her coaches.

Elsa was 15 when made her Olympic debut and now, here in Tokyo, it was her third. In those nearly 10 years she had completely given herself to her sports. It wasn’t that friends were a distraction, it was that she didn’t want to get hurt again.

“Elsa?” Anna asked, breaking the other woman from her thoughts.

Elsa opened her eyes and looked at the Australian. In her loose-fitting casual suit and free-flowing hair, Anna appeared to never forget the fun of swimming. And look where that got her? She was neck and neck, or even besting Elsa. Anna knew everyone on her team and several others from around the world. She greeted everyone like lifelong friends and no one could deny her contagious charisma on camera.

“I started swimming because it was fun and I could hang out with my friends.” Elsa finally admitted out loud.

“I thought you didn’t have time for friends?” Anna replied, that ghost of a smirk reappearing.

“I did back then.”

“And what happened?”

“I went one way and they went another. Our paths never crossed again”

Anna floated forward and hung both arms over the lane rope. “That was back when you were a kid, people grow up and grow apart. That’s as normal as a flower blooming.”

Elsa didn’t respond, she didn’t see the comparison to flowers, not every bud bloomed.

“Just because your old mates ditched you doesn’t mean you can’t make new ones. Especially here with like-minded folks. Now I reckon you haven’t had any fun in a while yeah?”

What are you trying to say"

“I watched you practice for a bit before you noticed me, you’re all in your head and that’s doing no one any good.”

“How did you know it was me?”

“So many questions, you Americans ask so many questions, just live a little.” Anna laughed, “Your name is on the box mate.” She gestured to the box behind the starting block that currently held Elsa’s dry clothes.

“So now you’re stalking me, how did you even get a lane next to me anyway?”

“Again with the questions, I didn’t purposely try, I suppose it’s the universe just pulling us together.” She winked and pulled her goggles back down. Elsa dipped back down into the water just below her eyes to hide the heat rising in her cheeks. “Now a question for you mate, when’s the last time you pretended to be a mermaid?”

The rest of the allotted practice time consisted of the two of them swimming back and forth in their lanes, dolphin kicking, spinning, and splashing each other. Elsa wasn’t sure when or how exactly it happened. One minute they were just swimming and the next they were doing spins and twists and diving down. Anna made some great faces underwater and for once in a long time, Elsa was having fun. She even smiled which only seemed to fuel Anna into further antics.

Elsa left the locker room later feeling lighter and more focused than she had been in years.

~~~

Despite the Olympic events being closed to the public, there was still a sizable audience piled into the aquatics center. Swimmers and other athletes were clustered in the stands by their country. There wasn’t to be any audience at all, but the officials decided some bodies in the stands brought more life to events.

Elsa spotted the US cluster, they were hard to miss in their snow-white outfits and obnoxious red, white, and blue bucket hats. Elsa had yet to put hers on. It was a very ugly hat, but if the team was wearing them maybe she could suck it up for a little bit. Elsa took a deep breath and started up the stairs of the bleachers. She was spotted almost instantly.

“Anderson! Sit with us!” One of her teammates called. Elsa nodded, thankful her mask prevented her from having to fake a smile.

“I’m surprised you’re here but man it’s good to have you.” The girl, whose name was Jan? Jenny maybe? Swam Butterfly, she was the same age as Elsa but this was her first Olympics.

At least Elsa was pretty sure of that. After her practice with Anna last night she had gone back to her room, deciding that she would make an effort to be more present. She stayed up later than she should have, reading through the USA Swimming’s Tokyo roster, putting faces to names and names to events.

Elsa sat down between Jannet, she was sure now, and a backstroker named Sam. They both beamed at her, Sam pulled out his phone to get a photo of the three of them.

“No, no photos,” Elsa started to say but caught herself, “…without our hats!” She said, forcing as much positivity through her words as possible. This earned her a few cheers from the people around them and she mashed the ugly hat on her head as the photo grew to more people.

“I can’t believe we got a photo with Anderson.”

“Dude I know, she’s always training.”

“Bruh this is unreal, tag me in that shit.”

“My mom’s gonna be so excited!”

Various voices from all around her, excited and happy tones. She had been so worried they would be cold towards her, or there would be whispers about why she was here. Instead, her teammates seemed almost welcoming, be it a bit starstruck.

“Are you excited for your race this afternoon?” Elsa asked Sam who seems to nearly implode.

“You know when I swim? Dude this is awesome!”

The hype of Elsa being there finally calmed down and she was able to actually talk with people.. Elsa had the day off from racing today. It was interesting, being a casual spectator instead of studying the strokes. She hadn’t really watched a men’s race in so long, she had forgotten how animated they got when they won. Slapping the water, sitting on the lane ropes, their arms lifted high into the sky as cameras flashed.

During a lull Elsa stood to locate some kind of drink, talking so much was exhausting. She walked into the wide hallway behind the bleachers and saw long red hair clashing with a bright yellow jacket that read AUSTRALIA down the arm in a green font that perfectly matched the pants.

Anna turned as Elsa neared as if pulled by some invisible force. She smiled behind her mask before speaking, Elsa could tell from the creases in the corner of her eyes “You’re here? And not cranking away at the gym? I must be dreaming.”

“I’m here, I was even sitting with my team.”

“They let you sit with them while wearing that hat?” she teased.

“We all have this thing,” Elsa replied, tapping the hat with one finger.

“And you lot say our outfits hurt the eyes.” She reached forward as if to touch Elsa but pulled her hand back after a sideways glance at a nearby volunteer. “I’m really glad you came, I hope you have a good time. I’m coming for you soon though, be ready.”

“I’m always ready,” Elsa responded, the absence of a touch that never was hung heavy in the air and she wished Anna had broken protocol.

“Oh, I know.” Anna winked again and walked off in the opposite direction. Elsa fought the urge to follow her. Team Australia was on the opposite side of the pool and Elsa had no valid reason to go that way and was thus barred from going any further.

Elsa bruised herself by looking at a random floor tile, she didn’t want to get caught staring at someone. So occupied she was that she didn’t see Anna turn back to look at her before rounding the corner.

~~~

Today was the day. The last race of her Olympics, till the next one that is.

Elsa dove into the pool, this was her warm-up period. She was there with a handful of other swimmers, swimming lengths across the wide part of the diving pool while other races took place in the main pool.

Stroke, breathe. Stroke, breathe.

She went at a steady pace and focused on her reach, turning her shoulders and pulling the water back. Today felt better, her strokes felt more fluid, and her mind wasn’t clouded. She let it freely drift from one subject to the next, without dwelling on the angle of her elbows, or how much her hand was scooped. Anna kept drifting to the forefront of her mind and Elsa allowed herself to swim through those thoughts. She decided when she won today, she would do all her interviews with Anna. She was done with doing the media ally solo.

In the blink of an eye, she was sitting in a chair in the ready room. Both caps on, goggles on, only one earbud in. She nodded and waved to anyone she made eye contact with but she didn’t talk to them. She wasn’t going to change completely overnight and she still had to focus.

There was a sudden shift in the energy of the room and Elsa turned her head to see that yellow cap enter the room. Anna sat down in front of Elsa again and turned in her chair.

“So what’s in your ears today eh?”

“Just some bass-heavy EMD music,” Elsa replied.

“Oh didn’t take you for a clubber.”

“I’m not, fast beats just help me focus.”

“Ah, you’re gonna need that today my friend,” Anna once again winked and Elsa was starting to think maybe she wasn’t imagining things. That or Anna had a facial tick and Elsa was completely caught up in a fantasy.

~~

They walked out to the swim floor one by one as they were announced by lane number for the women’s 800-meter freestyle race. Anna was in lane 5 today, Elsa in lane 4. All that stood between her and the podium was 16 lengths of the pool. Elsa stepped up onto the started block and waited.

“Take your mark.” came the far too robotic sounding announcer, followed by a sharp single beep.

Her muscles reacted on instinct and she dove into the water. Kicking, surfacing, and falling into her rhythm. She breathed every few strokes, pacing herself for the final sprint that was still many lengths off. The woman from Japan matched her pace over in lane 3 and Elsa regretted not knowing her name.

A flip turn and now with every breath she could see Anna, her yellow cap a bright beacon above the blue lane rope. She was also matching pace with Elsa, their strokes synchronized, Anna breathed on the left, and every few strokes they looked at each other. It was electrifying.

Another flip turn and Elsa could only see the edge of the Japanese women’s fingers, she was already falling back. But there were many lengths to go for Elsa to maintain the lead.

As she came into the wall an official dipped a number into the pool, letting her know how many lengths she had left. Another flip turn and there was Anna again.

Finally, after many lengths, Elsa and Anna headed towards the wall. Bells rang indicating this was the final lap. They would be coming out of this flip turn in a sprint.

Elsa resurfaced after the turn and began kicking. Harder. She could no longer see the Japanese woman but she had no time to focus on that fact. All that mattered was to get to the wall, turn one last time and slam into home. She could already taste the gold. She could hear the National anthem in all its obnoxiousness.

She turned and exploded off the wall, pulling from every reserve. She wasn’t breathing as often, trying to stay as streamlined as possible. Anna, she could see, was doing the same. They were no longer in sync, swapping the lead back and forth.

They passed the halfway point and Elsa pulled whatever energy she had left. Desperately pulling and kicking at the water. She saw the yellow cap fade in and out of her line of sight. The lane rope shifted to a solid color, the wall was near. This was do or die.

Elsa slammed into the wall at full speed and a wave of water splashed up onto the deck in response. She looked not to the scoreboard but over to Anna. Who, despite being out of breath, smiled at her.

The other swimmers came into the wall around them and Elsa glanced now at the board. She couldn’t believe what she saw

(AUS) Harding A.- 8:12:57

(USA) Anderson E. - 8:13:83

She had lost by the narrowest of margins. Instead of being mad, she turned back to Anna who was already climbing over the lane rope. She hugged Elsa with one arm and pumped the air with the other. Beaming for the cameras.

“Told you I’d get ya,” Anna said in a voice loud enough only for Elsa to hear.

And Elsa didn’t reply. She just smiled, genuinely for the first time in a long time. She gave Anna a hug in return and regrettably let her go to turn to the Japanese women. Giving her a handshake and congratulating her on her race.

When Elsa turned back, Anna was surrounded by other swimmers and the officials were trying to subtly clear the pool without ruining the photos for the press.

Elsa couldn’t remember another time she felt so happy to come in second.

~~~

The Australian anthem  has just finished playing. Anna reached out a hand to first Elsa and then the bronze medalist. Elsa pretended not to notice how Anna’s hand lingered just a few seconds too long in hers.

They posed for pictures together for what seemed like hours before the volunteers were ushering them towards the media. Anna placed a hand on Elsa’s back, ever so slightly, like a question that Elsa could choose to lean into or walk away. She picked the former and Anna’s step seemed to spring a bit as they walked towards their first interview. The woman with bronze had vanished and at the moment Elsa didn’t care, but for an entirely different reason than she usually did.

Finally, the pair entered the locker room, it was surprisingly empty, their medal ceremony was the last of the day, and there weren’t any more races, practice times would start within the hour but for right now, it was quiet.

Anna was first to speak, she removed her mask and smiled at Elsa and Elsa felt her face heat up. She copied Anna, removing the massive mask that obscured most of her face and returned the smile.

“Here, you deserve these,” Anna said, handing Elsa her gold medal bouquet.

“Are those for me?” Elsa said, of course, she had her own bouquet but the gesture and genuine tenderness of Anna made everything more special.

“No they’re for the empty chair behind you, of course, they’re for you.” She paused then added, “Sorry, they’re not orchids or crocuses or roses.”

“I’ve only heard of roses. I know nothing about flowers.”

“Oh well, in that case, enjoy these sunflowers, they bring out the blue in your eyes.”

“Anna?” Elsa asked, nearly whispering the name, she wasn’t brave enough to look into the other woman’s eyes so she stared down at the flowers, they were yellow like all of Anna’s team gear. Elsa decided she liked yellow, and she liked yellow a lot.

“Will you, join me in the dining hall? I want to take you to dinner.”

“Wow in the IOC-provided cafeteria where everything is free? You shouldn’t have.” Anna teased but her tone lacked any malice. She stepped closer to Elsa, closing the gap but still giving her space.

Elsa smirked and found her confidence, “Oh hush, you know that’s our only option.”

“I know, I’m just teasing you.”

A door opened at the other end of the locker room. “Ms. Harding, you’re wanted for an interview please.”

Anna sighed and shook her head, “the burdens of winning I suppose.” She seemed to hesitate for a moment and then leaned in and kissed Elsa on the cheek. She stepped back to allow a shocked Elsa to catch her breath.

“I’ll see you tonight,” Anna said and winked before walking away and through the locker room door to flashing cameras.

Elsa lifted a hand to her face where Anna touched her, closed her eyes, and smiled.

[omniswords]

Chronicles of a Parisian Dumbass 8

now that La Joconde is over, i can give a lot more attention back to Chronicles. i know we’ve been wicked overdue for an update, so thank you so so so much for being patient with me as i’ve been working through it. i really hope you like today’s update, and that you can give it a reblog if you enjoyed it so other people can too 💙🎶💖

boy i sure hope these orders didn’t have one of those “send your cutest delivery boy” requests

i mean, on the one hand, i’m flattered and my boss is absolutely right

but the things you do for Bread, smh.

It was bound to happen, Luka keeps telling himself as he loads up his bike, and as he straps on his helmet, and as he rides over bridges and through busy streets to get his work done. His stomach’s been turning ever since he checked the delivery tickets, and every anxious feeling’s been flitting under his skin, and it was only a matter of time before he’d have to make a delivery to Marinette Dupain-Cheng’s literal, actual, entire house.

(Well. It didn’t actually have one of those “send your cutest delivery boy” requests. But it did ask for him by name. And he’s barely been able to keep still, with his name in her voice buzzing in his head, ever since.)

The other households don’t do much to ease his mind. At best, the rides and the thirty-second interactions numb him, but only for a short moment. Every time he mounts his bike again and pedals away, he’s reminded that he’s one step closer to her place.

It shouldn’t even get to him as much as it does. He’s been doing this job for ages now, in spite of what little upward mobility there is. It gets the bills paid, and he’s good enough at what he does that the place gives him steady hours, and admittedly, it’s nice to peek into the lives of strangers for all thirty of those seconds. The birthday party he’s accidentally interrupted, where he’s suddenly hailed as a hero because he’s got pizza. The post-breakup night in, where a guy he’s never even met sounds like the screeching drag of a bow across a violin bridge. The family who’s too tired to cook because the mother has cancer and the father’s tired of barley soup and pasta and the daughter, who’s still living with her parents in her late twenties because she has to, only just got home from a bit of overtime.

(Most of these are just fancies, of course. He’ll be the first to admit he lets his imagination run away with him sometimes. But he’ll also be the first to say that someone in the world must be living like that. To someone in the world, that has to be real.)

Besides. He’s been to the bakery plenty of times before, knows well enough that the Dupain-Cheng family lives just above it, which is just about as fanciful as he’d expected. He’s spoken to Marinette a handful of times. He’s been on the business end of her witty words, wherever she got them from. Hell, he even gave her the note.

It’s just that… that’s the bakery. Not her house.

He’s never peeked into her story. Never even thought beyond what she’s allowed him to have. And he knows that whatever he sees will be real.

Luka’s mostly running on auto-pilot by the time he makes it to Tom and Sabine’s, and part of him has to wonder if it’s because he’s been at this job for too long, or if he’s been to the bakery too many times for his own good. (Honestly, he’d wager it’s a bit of both.) The bakery is closed for now, so he texts the number on the ticket—maybe Mr. Dupain’s, maybe Marinette’s.

He’s never texted her before. He doesn’t even have her number.

Should he ask for her number?

Would she even want his? Or would she feel like the creep because he’s the one on the clock?

Before he can ask himself any more questions, the light to the bakery turns on, and the front door opens, and the tinkling of the bell grabs his attention. And there’s Marinette, in a camisole and heart-patterned sleep shorts and slippers. And there’s black, and there’s a little lace right on the neckline, and—

And he’s staring.

And she’s starting to blush.

He tries his best to cock his brow, and holds up the delivery box. “You rang?”

God, he wishes that could have come out smoother.

At least Marinette laughs. Even if it might have just been a pity laugh. “Papa,” she says, trading the box and the paper bag for a few bills. “I guess he knew you worked there or something. He, uh… suggested. Very… very firmly. That we order from this place, once he found out we were considering it.”

“We?”

A whistle interrupts them, soft and low and sounding halfway impressed. Luka catches the glint of glasses and a flash of reddish hair as Marinette whips around and hisses, “Would you go upstairs? You’re supposed to be picking a movie!”

“Are you kidding? This is the movie!” The redhead, whoever they are, calls out, but the sound of footsteps receding tells him it isn’t long before they’re in the clear again. Just the two of them, caught in an interaction that probably should have already ended. And he’s stuck wondering if she doesn’t want it to end, either—because maybe they’re not quite in the clear, or at least, she isn’t yet. She’s got a whole best friend upstairs, probably waiting to grill her on every little detail.

(Every little detail of what? It’s just him…)

Marinette rolls her eyes and shakes her head as she turns back to him. “Sorry. Best friends, right?”

Luka manages a shrug and a weak laugh of his own. He doesn’t much feel like talking about how his best friends are his literal blood and the thing almost constantly strapped to his back. And that most of the people who approximate friendship are on the other side of a screen and will probably never see him in real life, whatever that is. “How long have you known her?”

“Long time. Since she moved here from Martinique. We were basically attached at the hip in like, middle school.” She shifts her weight from foot to foot; to Luka, it doesn’t go unnoticed. “It’s hard for us to meet up anymore—travel journalism, studying abroad, all that stuff. We only really get to FaceTime these days. Other than that… it has its hiccups here and there, but I love her. You know? And sometimes she can be a little, uh… overzealous? In what she does?”

“I heard that!” a voice comes from the stairwell.

Marinette doesn’t even have to turn and glare for the rest of the footsteps to fall away. “Sorry,” she mumbles again. “You didn’t exactly come here to hear chunks of my life story, did you.”

“I don’t mind your life story,” he says, thumbing through the bills to count them. “With a job like this, I get to carry a little bit of everybody with me, and hearing about your best friend beats the eightieth guy trying to tell me about his divorce and how women are just trying to suck us dry.” Then his brow furrows, in spite of his own sarcasm, and he looks up. “You gave me extra. Like, way extra.”

“Oh, uh…” Marinette laughs nervously. “Yeah, I guess that’s a habit I picked up. Tipping is a thing in the States. People think you’re a jerk if you don’t do it, so my brain sort of… went on autopilot.” She rubs the back of her neck, maybe out of modesty, and Luka can’t tell if it’s because of the amount of money she gave him, or because of the experiences she’s had.

“Well…” He counts out the extra bills. “Here, you should take these back, then—”

“No, no.” She shakes her head, gestures as if to push the money back towards him. “Don’t worry about it. Keep it.”

“As what? A souvenir from New York?”

Marinette grins. It’s slow, and lazy, and it might make his heart thud in his chest at a hundred kilometers an hour, and he’s definitely thinking, don’t look at the lace, do NOT look at the lace. “Think of it as me making up for all the times I could’ve let you have a napoleon on the house, but didn’t.”

Luka blinks at her a couple of times. More than a couple of times. Too many words are bubbling in his throat and behind his teeth, desperate to get out, but his brain can’t catch up with any of them, and he doesn’t even know what order to put them in besides. Part of him wants to figure out something smooth to say, part of him wants to laugh like an idiot and thank her, and part of him wants to take the worst leap possible and ask what she’s doing on Saturday. But before he can prioritize any of them and put his dignity even more at risk, a holler comes from upstairs—”Marinette!”—and he jolts back in attention. He crumples the money in his fists and swallows his heart back down into his chest, and if he looks closely, Marinette’s cheeks are turning bright red, and her teeth are sinking into her lip as if… holding something back.

“I better go,” she says, nodding toward the stairs and taking a step back. She’s standing on the sides of her feet, and it’s honestly adorable. “Keep the change. I mean it, okay?”

Luka wants to protest—wants to say something about how his mother always told him never to take a single euro he didn’t honestly work for. Instead, he crumples the money in his fist, nods dumbly, and pockets it. “Hey,” he says, just as he senses she’s about to turn on her heel and speedwalk back up the stairs.

Marinette looks at him, and in the moment he gets that bubbling-word feeling in the back of his throat again. At least the mortifying thought of asking her out has died down, but it’s been replaced with something worse: the reminder that, for some reason, she and his sister know each other. Is it weird? he wants to ask. Are you sure it’s not weird seeing me? Is there something going on? Did Jules do something to you? Did you do something to her? Are you mad that I didn’t say anything? Are you okay?

Are you okay, Marinette?

Instead, he clears the words out of his throat, and shakes his head, and he hopes Marinette isn’t running a million worst-case scenarios in her head the way he does when someone looks or sounds even mildly displeased. He hopes she isn’t blaming herself the way he does when someone looks like they have something to tell him and then… don’t. “Next time I swing by,” he says, “will that napoleon be on the house?”

Her expression doesn’t take very long to go soft, even though her grip on the delivery box tightens. “Who knows?” she murmurs, and it’s… strange, how the tongue-in-cheek traces in her voice comfort him more than they put him on edge. “Guess you’ll just have to come back and find out.”

Then she turns on her heel, nearly bumps into the counter on her way to the stairs, and—and she really does spare him one more glance, the kind that says she’d wave good night if her hands weren’t full. Without much thinking, he does the waving for both of them, with a smile he knows is nervous and crooked spreading across his face. And then he’s the one to bump backwards into the door, the bell above giggling and announcing his clumsiness, before he stumbles to his bike and speeds away. He knows better than to text and bike, even if he could brag that sometimes he’s halfway decent at it, but at least he waits until he gets to the Canal Saint-Martin so he can have that silent-screaming moment alone.

so not only did I get that bread today, i got a whole fuckin sandwich. if we’re going by that whole metaphor i mean.

speaking of figurative language, you know, that thing i never thought i’d use once i graduated from high school… dear CBG: when i told you i hope you found all that money on the ground, i didn’t mean GIVE IT TO ME.

[largedenominationsplease]

Wish You Were Sober

Summary: The Pogues are growing up and following their dreams, which means it's time for JJ and Kiara to sort through some feelings. Loosely inspired by "Wish You Were Sober" by Conan Gray.

Word Count: 5.2k

A/N: This was originally posted on ao3, but I wanted to share here as well.

August is full of gold and light and sunsets and new beginnings. It’s exciting and revitalizing and hopeful. But at the end of this August, a deep blue shadow edged nearer and nearer, threatening to turn all Augusts deep and blue and dreary for the rest of history. They were all leaving.

After the chaos of the gold hunting summer, when John B and Sarah finally made it back from the Bahamas with the gold, the Pogues had made a solemn pact to stay in the Outer Banks together, and they took it very seriously. Then came graduation and talk of going to college. The constant, “What are you going to do with your life?” questions wore them down. John B, Sarah, and Pope took a gap year, but Pope’s parents had threatened his life if he changed his school plans, especially after he “won a scholarship” from the mysterious “Denmark Tanny Education Grant” - in other words, his secret savings account. Sarah started talking about becoming a social worker, while John B wouldn’t shut up about the police academy and honoring Sheriff Peterkin’s memory. Kiara also talked about her plans, the Peace Corps, or volunteering in Thailand, and though she made it sound like that was years down the road, everyone knew she was getting restless. So, as summer approached, the Pogues had had a serious meeting about the future, or as serious as you can be at eighteen-almost-nineteen. They absolved the pact to stay in the Outer Banks, but they kept strict communication rules: regular updates in the group chat, facetime sessions at least weekly, and frequent visits. And so plans were made; John B and Sarah were moving to Chapel Hill at the end of August so she could attend the University of North Carolina (John B had considered getting a degree in law enforcement, but had decided to work until he was old enough to apply for the police academy). Pope was headed off to Duke to study forensic pathology like he had always dreamed. Frequent jokes were cracked about them attending rival schools, but at least they’d live within thirty minutes of each other. Kiara’s plans involved a little more distance. She had decided to volunteer her way through Europe for a few months once the tourist season was over. She had one-way tickets booked for the middle of September, and she hadn’t mentioned her plans to return as of yet. JJ was the only one without any plans. It came as no surprise that he hadn’t graduated high school, he never attended. Instead, he got a job at a local auto shop his cousin owned. He was lucky they hired him, and though the pay wasn’t phenomenal, it was enough he could pay rent to John B and Uncle T and stay in the Chateau without tapping into his savings. He joked that you couldn’t pay him to leave the Outer Banks, though that felt like a lie. Especially now that summer was ending and these dreams were becoming a reality for everyone else. 

“One last kegger!” John B was saying. JJ tried not to wince at that word: last. 

“Pogues for life!” Kiara whooped, jumping up and threatening to flip the hammock she was sharing with JJ and Pope. 

Pope wrestled the half-finished beer from her hands. “I think you’ve had enough of that.”

Kiara dove across him clumsily, trying to recover the bottle. Almost-drunk Kie was more comfortable around Pope. After their kiss that one summer, things had gotten awkward fast as she realized she didn’t have any romantic feelings for him. They had fought hard to get their relationship back to the easy-going friendship it had been, but it hadn’t made a full recovery - unless one or both of them was drunk. 

“Easy tiger,” JJ said, pulling her back into her spot between himself and Pope. 

She gave him an odd look. “You’re not drunk.”

“No, I have work in the morning.”

“When did JJ become the most mature?” Sarah slurred. She really hadn’t had that many drinks, but then again she was a total lightweight. 

“What do you say, Oh Mature One?” John B shifted so he was looking directly at JJ. “Kegger tomorrow night at the Boneyard?”

“Hell, yeah!” JJ settled back into the hammock, not really thinking about the fact that his arm was still around Kiara’s waist.

The rest of the Pogues whooped in agreement, downing their drinks and reaching for more.

***

JJ woke up five full minutes before the alarm on his phone went off the next morning. Kiara’s feet were in his face and she was snoring softly, as she tended to do when drunk. The slight headache pulsing through his temples told him he had had more to drink than he should have despite going to bed before the rest of the group, which was probably why he didn’t remember Kie crashing in his bed. He threw a blanket across her and made his way to the bathroom. He could see Sarah and John B wrapped around each other in their room, and in the other room, Pope passed out on the pull-out. Just like old times, he thought with a pang of nostalgia.

As he got ready for work and made breakfast JJ found himself getting more excited about the party they’d have that evening, despite his initial apprehension. Though the Pogues were over at the Chateau almost every night this summer, they hadn’t had a real hang at the Boneyard in a while. Maybe one last summer hurrah really would lessen the sting of the Pogues parting ways.

JJ hadn’t bothered with being quiet that morning. Most of the Pogues were deep sleepers. Add alcohol to the mix and he doubted he’d wake anyone up, so it was a surprise when Kiara wandered bleary-eyed and half-asleep down the hall. “Look who decided to make an appearance!” JJ said.

“Shh,” Kie groaned. “No speaking, just coffee.”

JJ obediently handed over his mug of coffee and set about pouring a new one. Kiara hugged the cup close and sank to the floor, sitting conveniently in the exact center of the kitchen. She was wearing one of his sweatshirts - but she always stole all the guys’ clothes. 

“Jeez, Kiara, could you choose a more inconvenient spot, maybe?” She simply squinted up at him from the floor in response. “You’re in pretty bad shape, hope you don’t have work today.”

“Shit!” she cried. “What time is it?”

“Almost ten.”

“I have to be at work at ten,” she groaned. “My dad’s gonna kill me if I show up late and hungover.”

“Need a ride over there?” JJ asked.

“It won’t make you late, will it?”

“‘Course not,” he lied.

“You’re the best!” she jumped up clumsily and kissed him on the cheek before stumbling her way back down the hall to freshen up. She was more or less ready within five minutes, opting to keep on JJ’s sweatshirt, paired with yesterday’s shorts. “How do I look?” she asked, shoving on sunglasses and reaching for a second cup of coffee.

“Hot.”

“Liar. Let’s go.”

They arrived at the Wreck, and JJ asked, as Kiara jumped out of the van, “When do you get off?”

“Four-thirty. Dad might make me stay longer to make up for showing up late, though.”

“I can’t get back here till five.”

“Okay, that’s cool. See you then! Thanks for the ride!” She downed the last of her coffee and chucked the travel mug into the back of the van through the window. She was still off-balance as she ran up to the door. JJ watched until she was inside. Today was going to go by so slowly, he could feel it. 

***

The day ended up dragging by for everyone. There was usually quite a bit of work at the auto shop, but today was abnormally slow. The same went for the Wreck; as they approached the end of tourist season, their business dropped considerably. When five o’clock finally rolled around, Kiara dropped everything and bolted. JJ was just pulling into the parking lot, followed closely by John B and Sarah on JJ’s bike. “Pope’s meeting us there a little later!” Sarah called. She raised an eyebrow as Kiara approached, noticing JJ’s sweatshirt. 

John B was trading off keys with JJ, “Sarah and I are going to pick up the kegs; meet you there?”

Despite the earliness, a few kids were milling around when the crew arrived, mostly Tourons. JJ and Kiara started a bonfire and kicked the party off with some of his cousin’s “cripple.” As it got later more and more people showed up, still mostly Tourons and other kids from the Cut, but a few Kooks made an appearance. Tensions still ran high between Kooks and Pogues, but if beer and weed were offered, they were pretty much willing to put aside their differences. The sun began to set, while the party began to heat up. Someone had brought a speaker and was blasting some obnoxious club mixes; people were dancing. 

Sarah made her way over to the fire where Kiara was beginning to relax thanks to the joint in her hand. She’d had a few drinks at this point and was pleasantly buzzed. She tried to take the joint from Kiara but was pushed away. “You puke when you’re crossfaded, Sar!” 

“I do not! Besides, I’m not even drunk.”

Kiara just laughed. Sarah plopped down next to her best friend and wrapped her arm around her. “I’m gonna miss you, Kie.”

“I’ll miss you, too. But don’t get emotional on me. Tonight we’re just having fun!” Kie put out her joint and threw it in the fire. Someone walking by handed the girls another drink. 

“So,” Sarah wiggled her eyebrows and tugged on the sleeve of Kie’s - JJ’s - sweatshirt. “You and JJ?”

“Me and JJ, what?”

“Did you hook up?” Tipsy Sarah was even blunter and to the point than sober Sarah. 

“God, no!” Kie couldn’t tell if the blood rushing to her face was due to the alcohol, the fire, or something else. “Why would you think that?”

“You’re wearing his clothes!”

“I’ve stolen clothes from all the guys, including your boyfriend! It doesn’t mean anything.”

Sarah hummed, half in disbelief. She decided not to fully change the subject. “Have you asked him yet?”

“Mm?” Kie hummed. “Oh… no. I don’t think he’ll want to go.” When Kie had realized JJ would be the only Pogue left in the Outer Banks this fall, she’d decided to ask him if he wanted to join her in Europe. She knew he had talked a big game about running away to Yucatan at sixteen, and perhaps he’d like to see a bit of the world. It’s not like they were strapped for cash, or he really needed his job at the auto shop. Even though they’d had to turn over most of the gold when John B and Sarah brought it back from the Bahamas, the crew had managed to hide enough of it away that they were pretty much set. The jobs they held were more for appearances, and so their parents didn’t ask too many questions. 

“Of course he’ll want to go! Even if he doesn’t, worst-case scenario is he says no, and you go alone like you were already planning.” Sarah watched as Kie started chewing on her lower lip like she did when she was anxious. “Unless you don’t want to go alone?”

Kiara didn’t want to admit it, but she really didn’t want to travel by herself. She could take care of herself just fine and she enjoyed her alone time, but she’d never left the country before, and the thought of being so far from home with no one familiar around was starting to worry her. Just a little bit. She downed another beer and reached for another joint, saying lightly, “No I’m totally fine!”

“She says as she gets totally smashed,” Sarah muttered under her breath. Kie had gotten up and dragged a random Touron girl to dance with her. 

Kiara’s tolerance was pretty high when it came to intoxicating substances, she rivaled JJ, though he wouldn’t admit it. By the time Sarah had joined her she was quite relaxed, so when she’d decided to dance she was well on her way to wasted, the combination of weed and beer making her a little dizzy. As she spun around with the pretty redhead in front of her, she caught sight of JJ standing way too close to a girl who was obviously there with her boyfriend. Kie fought the urge to roll her eyes until she noticed the boyfriend was equally fascinated with whatever bullshit JJ was spilling. She laughed to herself; leave it to JJ to flirt with a girl and get her boyfriend thrown in the mix, too. Somehow the thought of JJ flirting with someone else bothered her, but she chalked it up to the anxiety of asking him to go traveling with her. She called out for more beer. 

JJ was having an alright time. He’d drank much less than he normally did, and he hadn’t even touched the joint in his pocket. The party he had been so excited for was setting him on edge for a reason he couldn’t quite place. His mind kept wandering back to the ride over to the Boneyard, with Kiara clinging to his waist as he took the backroads on his bike... There was a cute Touron girl talking to him and he allowed himself to flirt back until she introduced him to her boyfriend. He was always wary of boyfriends, and for once he really didn’t want to start a fight, so it was surprising when the boyfriend started flirting back. Shit. JJ thought and tried to back the hell out of that situation, a situation he normally would have been dying to jump into. He was two seconds from bolting just to get away from them, when Pope stumbled up, crashing into him drunkenly. 

“Dude, you’re wasted!” JJ chuckled gratefully, pulling his less-than-sober friend away from the Tourons. “How much have you had to drink?” 

“Enough,” Pope laughed. He was a happy drunk, though JJ could tell he was a moment away from puking. He steered Pope towards the cooler full of non-alcoholic drinks and fished out a water bottle. “Drink all of it,” he demanded. 

Pope complied, first saying, “Kie’s dancing.” JJ had already noticed, of course. The pretty redheaded girl he didn’t recognize had her arms around Kie’s waist and they were passing drinks back and forth, neither of them anywhere near sober. Even drunk, Kie’s dancing was amazing. And she didn’t care who danced with her, she was always looking for a partner. Part of JJ wished he had been closer to her, and maybe she would have pulled him into the dance instead of the other girl. He was pulled away from the scene by the sound of Pope losing his entire dinner. “Shit,” Pope groaned. “I think I’m sticking with Coke for the rest of the night.”

“You do that, man,” JJ laughed. 

The party wore on, but JJ stayed near Pope, making sure he wouldn’t pass out or anything. A nervous-looking girl wandered over, she was obviously not drinking and seemed rather uncomfortable with the whole situation. Pope asked her where she was from and she awkwardly explained that she was here with her sister, who had disappeared. To JJ’s surprise, Pope easily struck up a conversation with the girl, and she actually seemed interested in the crap he usually talked about - dead bodies and such. She actually knew a fair amount about forensics, studied it for a year or something. JJ decided to leave the two of them to their weird fascination with cadavers. He caught sight of Kie again, still with the redhead girl, though not really dancing anymore as much as stumbling aimlessly and laughing obnoxiously. JJ couldn’t remember the last time he had seen her that drunk. 

Kiara saw JJ standing at the edge of the group of teens dancing. “JJ!” She cried wildly. She tugged the girl she was with along, “This is my bes’ frien’, you hafta meet him.” As she got closer, she waved, “J - JJ! Hi!”

She fell into him. He pulled her upright, saying, “Hey, Kie.”

“JJ! This is my friend! She’s so pretty. She’s..shit, wha’s your name?”

“Leah,” the girl giggled, in a North Carolina accent. She was as drunk as Kie. “OMG, y’all are too cute! She hasn’t stopped talking about you all night! I kinda thought I’d get to take her home with me, but not with you hangin’ around…” She trailed off with a boisterous laugh. She pulled a pen out of her pocket, grabbed Kiara’s arm, and started scribbling a phone number. “If you ever get bored with him, text me!”

“She’s so nice,” Kiara gushed. “So pretty. Her hair looks like the sunset, and she danced ama-amazing. Amazingly? Do you say amazing or amazingly? She smelled nice, too. Like strawberries.”

“Kie, how much have you had to drink?” Her cheeks were flushed and her eyes unfocused, her speech slurring more by the second. 

“Dunno…” she whispered, too loudly. JJ took her arm and moved to lead her away from the crowd, back to where Pope was still chatting with his new friend, but she pushed him away. “Can do it myself!” She said belligerently, taking a few faltering steps, and promptly tripping over a stray piece of driftwood and falling hard into the sand. She laid in a crumpled heap, not bothering to move.

JJ rushed to her side, cursing himself for letting her get this bad. He made her sit up, and asked, “Did you hurt yourself?”

Kie nodded tears filling her eyes. She didn’t cry over injuries, so it was either the alcohol in her system, or she’d actually gotten pretty hurt. She put a hand to the side of her head, and JJ noticed a thin line of blood running in between her fingers. “Hey, hey, it’s okay,” he said. “Let me see.” She’d hit her head on the driftwood as she fell, and though the scrape didn’t look too bad, head wounds did bleed a lot; he just hoped she hadn’t given herself a concussion. “Okay,” he continued. “That’s not so bad. C’mere, let’s clean you up.”

He steadied her as she struggled to her feet, but as soon as she took a step, she cried out. She sank back down to the ground this time clutching her foot. “Fuck,” she muttered. “Think I fucked up my ankle, too.” She’d moved past the happy-friendly-drunk stage, and was headed into angry-drunk territory, or maybe sad-drunk, neither of which JJ wanted to experience at that moment. He knelt to examine her foot, sliding her now-broken sandal off and prodding her ankle. He carefully wiggled her toes and twisted her ankle in various directions, checking for a break. 

“Not broken,” he said finally. “Maybe sprained.”

“Fuck,” she growled - definitely into angry-drunk territory, now. 

“I’m going to take you home-“ JJ started.

“No!” At this, the tears spilled over and down Kie’s cheeks, maybe sad-drunk after all. “No, I’m fucking shitfaced and my parents are going to kill me, especially after being late to work today…”

“Okay, okay. Wanna go to the Chateau instead?”

She nodded, tears still falling, her breathing erratic.

JJ managed to grab a water from the cooler and let Pope know what had happened. The harder task was convincing Kiara to drink the water before they took off on his bike. He would have preferred to take the van, but John B was nowhere to be found, and neither was Sarah. They were probably off getting into trouble somewhere. The bike ride back to the Chateau was surprisingly nice, Kiara still retaining enough sense to cling to JJ’s shirt, even if her balance was off. Once they pulled up to the door, JJ reached to help her dismount. “I can- I can do it myself!” She said.

“That’s what you said before you fucking concussed yourself, Carerra.” He lifted her off the bike easily and tried to set her on the ground, but her eyes fluttered closed and she leaned into him.

“You smell nice,” she muttered.

“Sheesh, Kie, if you wanted to cuddle, you could have just asked. Didn’t have to go to all this trouble.”

They’d barely made it to the Chateau’s bathroom when Kie groaned, “Gonna puke.” JJ held her hair as she knelt in front of the toilet.

“Did you mix, Kie?” He asked surprisingly gently. 

She nodded, catching her breath.

“You know better than that.” 

She nodded again. 

“That first-aid kit is still around here, right?”

Kie groaned in response resting her head against the toilet bowl. JJ continued rummaging in the cabinet, before finding a bottle of hydrogen peroxide and a small first-aid kit. The cut on her head had almost stopped bleeding, so he started there, wiping it clean with peroxide. He handed her a wad of gauze and guided her hand to hold it to her head. “Hold this,” he said, as her hand started to drop. He placed her hand back on her head. “Hold this here. I’m getting ice.”

JJ returned with two bags of ice, one of which he placed on her rapidly swelling ankle. The other was for her head. He found antiseptic and a large bandage for her head. “How’d you get so good at this?” Kiara slurred.

“Practice,” he said with a grimace.

“Shit… sorry.” JJ hadn’t seen his dad in over a year at this point, but he still had a hard time talking about the things he experienced. Both Pope and Kie had tried to convince him to talk to a professional about his problems without much luck. Still, he had come a long way. 

Once JJ had helped Kie clean up her injuries, he left her to take a shower. She noticed the redhead’s - Leah’s - phone number on her arm, and rolled her eyes with embarrassment; she set about scrubbing it off. When she stepped out of the shower, she saw he had left her a pair of his sweatpants and a t-shirt. She found some toothpaste and fumbled through brushing her teeth with her finger while inspecting herself in the mirror. Her eyes were red-rimmed and glassy, there was a massive bandage on the side of her head, and she was nowhere near sober, so some improvement was needed. Maybe sleep would help. She limped into the living room, her still wet hair dampening the back of the t-shirt and making her shiver. She flopped onto the pull-out, and almost dozed off. 

JJ shook her leg, “Hey, Kie, you hit your head, you can’t sleep yet.”

She groaned as she sat up, “Dammit, Maybank.”

“You’re the one who decided to get totally shitfaced! Tea?” He handed her a hot cup of mint tea.

“Since when do y’all keep tea in this place?” She was grateful for the warmth, the mint soothing her dehydrated throat, and relaxing her.

“Since Sarah.” JJ made a face that, even drunk, Kie knew he didn’t really mean. He climbed onto the pull-out next to her, and she leaned into him, her head on his shoulder. 

“It’s gonna be weird without them…” Kie said, trying to keep her eyes open. 

“Yeah. Maybe I’ll finally get some damn peace and quiet around here,” he said lightly. 

“You won’t get lonely?” Kiara hadn’t meant to shift to that particular topic of conversation, but she was drunk enough she didn’t care. 

“Probably will,” JJ was surprised at his own honesty, but then again, Kiara was so far gone, she probably wouldn’t remember this conversation. 

“Come with me,” she said suddenly, sitting up. 

“What?” JJ laughed nervously.

“To Europe. Come with me.” The words were just spilling out, now. Kie could feel her cheeks burning and decided to blame it on the alcohol, and maybe the tea. “The Outer Banks will always be here when we get back, so why not see the world with me?”

“Kie, you’re drunk,” JJ said slowly. “And you’re hurt, and you’re tired. You don’t really want me to come with you. I’d fuck up all your plans.”

“No, no you wouldn’t!” She made sure to set her cup of tea on the floor, despite the fact she almost fell off the pull-out doing so. Sitting on her knees, she leaned toward him, “JJ, I’ve been wanting to ask you this for a while. I think you’d have fun, and I can’t stand the thought of you staying here alone!”

“Kiara, it’s a really bad idea. Imagine how much damage I could do in another country,” he laughed, though his voice was tight.

“That’s why we’d go together. To keep each other out of trouble and patch each other up when we do get scraped up. We’d have each other.” She was leaning over him now, her face inches from him. 

“Kie, you’re drunk-“ he started again. She closed the last few inches left, and pressed her lips to his, sloppily.

He pushed her away and jumped up. “No,” he said firmly. He started pacing, “Damnit, Carerra, you’re the one always going on about consent, and you’re fucking wasted right now, and do you know how long I’ve been waiting for that-“ he cut himself off. “Fuck! I wish you were sober right now!” 

He took off then, out the back door onto the porch. Through the window, Kie watched him fish a joint out of his pocket along with his lighter. He shakily ran his fingers through his hair and flopped down to sit on the stairs, staring out across the sound. 

Kiara blinked furiously, tears of anger, sadness, embarrassment threatening to spill over. She was not sober, she knew, but she wasn’t that drunk either. The shower and tea had gone a long way to sobering her up. Granted, she probably shouldn’t have relied on the alcohol to get her through that conversation. And kissing him? God, what was I thinking?!

Wiping her eyes, she grabbed the quilt off the pull-out, made another cup of tea, and made her way out to the deck. It was slow going, with her sprained ankle and all, but in a moment she was easing herself down to sit next to JJ. She wrapped the quilt around their shoulders and handed him one of the mugs of tea. She leaned into his side, setting her chin on his shoulder. He tensed but didn’t pull away. 

“Kie-“ he started.

“No, I’m sorry,” she said. “I shouldn’t have… I am drunk.” 

They sat in silence for a few moments. Between the tea and the joint, JJ had started to unwind. Kie was getting sleepy, each time she blinked her eyes stayed closed for a little longer. “Can we talk about it tomorrow?” She murmured.

“Sure, Kie.” He wrapped his arm around her then. “Yeah, we’ll talk about it tomorrow.”

***

Kiara woke up in JJ’s bed, again. She didn’t remember going to bed or falling asleep, honestly, she didn’t remember going inside at all. The last thing she remembered was the smell of JJ’s shirt, saltwater and bonfire, and weed and dozing off on the porch stairs. She was still wrapped in the quilt from the pull-out, now. Her head and ankle were throbbing, but there was a bottle of painkillers and a glass of water on the nightstand, which she took advantage of. JJ was nowhere to be seen, and the rest of the house was quiet; she wondered if any of the other Pogues had even bothered to come home the night before. On occasion, when a party got really out of hand, they would just crash in the van until they could drive again. As Kie made her way into the kitchen, her suspicions were confirmed, it was still just her and JJ. She smelled coffee. 

“Mornin’,” she said softly. JJ was leaning against the counter, a cup of coffee in one hand, a cigarette in the other. She poured herself a cup of coffee and pulled herself up onto the counter. 

“You sleep well?” JJ asked. 

She nodded.

“Headache?” 

Again, she nodded, then laughed, “This is so fucking domestic, who are we?”

The silence that followed was awkward. Kiara finally broke it, “Listen, about last night…”

“Kiara, I don’t want to-“

“We have to talk about it, J. I’d rather get it over with.” He sighed and gestured for her to continue. 

“Okay,” she began. “I didn’t ask you to come with me to Europe because I was drunk. If I’m honest with myself, I got so drunk because I was nervous to ask you to come with me.”

“Why were you nervous?” JJ hated how small his voice sounded.

“Um, I guess I didn’t want you to say no. I’m kinda nervous to travel by myself and be away from the Pogues for so long.”

“Oh, and I’m the only one without plans, so I’m the only one left to ask.” There was no malice in his voice. It was just a fact.

“No, you were actually my first choice,” she held eye contact with him, willing herself to feel more confident. “Regardless of the others’ plans, I wanted to ask you.”

“Why me, Kie?” He’d put out the cigarette and set down his coffee cup.

She took a deep breath and decided to be honest with him and with herself, for the first time. “Because you’re my best friend, and I can’t stand that I won’t see you for months if I go alone. Because you’re the kindest person I know, despite everything you’ve been through. Because I was so fucking jealous last night when I saw you talking to other people that I got absolutely shitfaced and tried to make you jealous, too, but even then you weren’t, and you were still nice to me. Because when I made a total fool of myself and busted my ass you took care of me. Because even though I made things totally awkward you were still sweet and even carried me to bed, I think, I mean who does that-“

“Kie…”

She continued, “Because even though I waited until I was drunk to kiss you, I’ve been wanting to do that for a fucking long time-“

In two steps, JJ had crossed the kitchen to her and grabbed her face in his hands. He captured her lips with his, almost desperately. When they broke apart, he said, “Kiara, I’ve loved you since we were thirteen.”

“You’ve got me beat, Maybank. I’ve loved you since we were sixteen.” They both chuckled. “What took you so damn long?” She asked.

“Me? What about you? And your stupid, ‘no macking on other Pogues’ rule?”

“Fuck that rule,” she said and pulled him back to her for another kiss. 

“Now that I’m pretty much sober, and only slightly hungover,” she said. “Will you please come with me to Europe?”

“Well, since you’re sober…” he said gently. “I’ll follow you anywhere, Kiara.”

For JJ, August was still full of gold and light and sunsets and new beginnings, and now that he had Kiara, it probably always would be. The Outer Banks and the Pogues would all be there when they returned.

[ikesenhell]

American Dream

AMERICAN DREAM, Chapter 1. You can find all other IkeSen works of mine here. NOTES: HOLY SHIT IT HAS BEEN A MINUTE. Thank you so much to @missjudge-me, who commissioned this whole piece. You have them to thank. I’m sorry it took so long for me to get back up, but being homeless and in grad school and working and getting formally diagnosed with an autoimmune illness and being in a pandemic and moving kinda takes it out of you. This was very fun to write. Enjoy!

---

Masamune wasn’t used to his childhood bedroom anymore. His mother had converted his loft bed desk into her scrapbooking station. That was fine, in theory, except that it meant two things: one, she hadn’t changed the sheets in actual years, and two, the loft bed was still there. 

“Sweet!” He announced with a laugh, scaling the ladder in a single bound. It’d felt so tall once. He ducked low against the ceiling, pressing his back flat. “Holy hell, I was smaller then.”

“Duh.” His brother, Kojiro, smirked from the door. Time changed everything. Masamune felt so big when he was in high school himself, but looking at his teen brother changed his perspective. “You’re a big lunk now. You eat like The Rock.”

“I’ll take that as a compliment.” Masamune kicked off his boots and army-crawled into the loft. 

“How much clearance you got?”

“Eh. Six inches from my chest to the ceiling?” He tried to roll onto his back and failed, laughing against the drywall. “Did you know about the time that I knocked myself out up here?”

Kojiro’s luminous blue eyes appeared over the lip of the bed. “Really?”

“Oh, yeah. Got too excited freshman year of high school, bolted straight up when the alarm went off.” He motioned at a dent in the ceiling. “I was late. Dad didn't stop laughing for about, I dunno—”

“—the whole ride there.” Kojiro chuckled. “Yeah. Sounds like him.”

The funeral wasn’t so far behind them that it didn't hurt, but it sure as hell hurt less. Masamune checked his knuckles into the dent. It was the whole reason for his coming home. His mother needed someone to sort out all of the old things, all the memories and bills she couldn’t bear to look at. It didn't matter that they’d never gotten along. Kojiro was her favorite; that was obvious (and Masamune couldn’t blame her for that, Kojiro was a joy by anyone’s standards). Even then he couldn’t let her hang in the lurch. His dad taught him better than that. 

Damn. He missed his dad. Everywhere he looked in this old town, in this old house, were reminders. There was the trashy diner where they used to get the world’s best milkshakes once a week. There was the old stove with the broken burner they’d never replaced (because it was ‘perfectly good’) where he’d learned how to cook. And it wasn’t just his father he felt the absence of. Masamune fingered along the space between the wall and the loft bed where he’d pasted all the pictures and keepsakes from his friends. Him and Nobunaga, posing in a picture by the beach with matching glasses. Hideyoshi and Mitsunari peering at homework, Mitsuhide poised to drop an ice cube down his shirt. (Nobunaga was a broker in New York City, conquering Wall Street with Hideyoshi. Those two shared an apartment in SoHo, all the way across the country on the other coast. Hideyoshi worked with Nobunaga now, and no one knew what Mitsuhide did. Mitsunari was off in the Peace Corps.) There was a snapshot of Masamune and Ieyasu squished together in the back of an old 1960s Volkswagen Beetle his mom had for decades, Ieyasu frowning over a mouthful of jalapeno poppers. Ieyasu was a doctor in Maryland now. He was terrible at texting back, too. Masamune made a mental note to call. 

And then there was Her. 

Even after all this time, he missed their friendship. He fingered the worn photograph; After-Prom senior year, her in a bikini that made his stomach somersault, him holding her on his shoulders. She was laughing. He still wore the fake eye back then, and it sat oddly in the socket, but even that didn't take away from the sheer joy as he gazed up at her. When she lived with her parents in the little green house across the street, he used to build paper airplanes with stupid jokes scrawled in the folds and fling it at her window, hoping that they’d hit and knowing they never would. They’d measure how far it got from his front door and compare their poorly-kept notes, misremembering all the numbers. 

Now she was out there in the world. 

Kojiro craned his neck over the loft edge. “What’cha got up there?”

Masamune didn't answer that. Instead he wondered if she was happy. “If I’m gonna stay here for now, we gotta fix this situation. I’m too manly and brawny to fit up here. Wanna swap beds?”

“No! This thing is so uncool, you can’t get—” And the teenager furtively checked the doorway, lowering his voice. “You can’t get anyone up here with you.”

As an adult, Masamune rolled his eyes. As a brother, he snapped back, “I promise, you can.”

“Gross, why the fuck would I trade with you now—!?”

Downstairs, their mother shouted, “Who is swearing up there!?” Kojiro paled. Masamune, bolstered with smug elder brother energy, kicked him from the ladder. 

“Move, punk! Run for your life! You fucked up!”

His mother, louder now. “Who said that?!”

“That was Masa!” Kojiro bellowed, fleeing the scene of the crime. “Masa said it that time!”

“That time!? Kojiro—!”

Masamune finally wriggled himself free from the narrow confines of the loft. On the way down, he pocketed the picture of Her. 

---

The only reason he remembered the day his dad bought the ‘85 Camaro was his mother was well and truly pissed about it. It wasn’t a pretty looking thing then. Masamune later sussed out that his dad had picked it off a side road out in the country because it was ‘a nice looking car’ and ‘could be fixed up’. Of course it could. Maybe it was his time in the military, but there wasn’t a damn car under the sun that his dad couldn’t fix. The Camaro was better than new, but his mom drove a newer Hyundai, so it sat neglected in the garage, shiny and electric blue and begging for a test run. When Masamune backed it into the driveway, his mother sighed ragged. 

“I ought to sell that thing,” she announced. 

Masamune bit back his reflex answer of ‘not on my watch’ and replied, “Kojiro’s gonna need a car when he can drive.”

“I’m going to get him something new. A nice car. That one is too old for anything now.”

“I could take it.”

“You already have that infernal death trap.” She thumbed at the Harley parked in the grass, right where she hated it most. In the name of getting along, neither of them had mentioned it. “You don’t need another car payment. Besides, don’t you have anything better to do right now? We have all sorts of things to settle with your dad’s estate.”

“Ma, the car is paid off.” But she was right in one way; he did already have a vehicle, and paying the taxes and insurance on both was a waste. It was sort of pointless, keeping the car in the garage forever. “I can’t do anything until I get the extra copies of his death certificate, and that’s gonna be a minute. I ordered them today. Did you want me to put the car on Craigslist or something?”

She gazed at it, her steel expression softening. Ah, yes. There was his mother. His parents loved each other dearly. It just took moments like this to remember it. 

“Would you?” She replied. Her feather soft voice broke his heart. “I can’t bear to do it.”

“Yeah, Ma. I’ll get it to a good home.”

---

All it really needed was a wash and an oil change. The guys at the auto parts store whistled enviously when they handed over the filters. No; it wouldn’t be hard to sell at all. No doubt he could post it on some Reddit forum and get a hundred hits in an hour. 

Masamune was about to post the listing when fate intervened. 

The driveway was warm on his bare back, the first chill wind of autumn cooling his shoulders. His phone was stark against the sharp blue sky, his shirt rolled under his hair. 

A shadow fell over him. “Masa?”

He blinked his only good eye, floundering against the sudden contrast. The woman murmured an apology, stepped away, and blinded him with sunlight again. 

“Hey!” He laugh-yelped, rolling onto his stomach. “Goddamn!”

“Oh my God, I’m so sorry—”

“No, no, it’s fine.” He clutched at the Camaro’s bumper and pulled himself up, blinking sundots away. “Gimme a sec, hang on.”

And then—she swam into view, all bright eyes and curves and nothing like she used to be and everything like she used to be and so much better. Was this his friend, this fully grown woman with a face like all his best memories? Where his words? He was usually so good with them. 

“That you, Masamune?” She asked, the ghost of a smile on her mouth. 

“Well, hell.” SAY SOMETHING, YOU STUPID BASTARD. He forced a grin back—but then it arrived all on its own. “Wow. Damn. Where have you been this whole time, Kitten, Hollywood? You runnin’ everyone out of a job out there? Puttin’ those Hadids out of work?”

Her laugh was the same. Good God, it sent shivers all the way down his spine and into his toes. Her eyes crinkled and he wondered if he could bottle that expression. “You’re still calling me Kitten, huh?”

“Your fault for wearing cat socks all the time. I don’t see a reason to stop now, ‘specially now that you blinded me in my own driveway.”

Even her eye roll was a shot of nostalgia to the veins. What now? Did he shake hands? Masamune stared at his oil-slicked palms from changing the filter. “Well, if you don’t mind me smearing grease all over you… Shit, what am I asking for?”

“Oh my God, Masamune, do not rub motor oil on me!”

“Too late!” He charged forward. She squealed but didn't run; he caught her around the waist and squashed her against him, bringing her feet from the ground. Those eyes were wide with surprise and delight and so much joy. Something smelled of cinnamon and cloves. “God, is that your shampoo?”

“Yeah.”

“It’s great. You look great.”

She batted against his chest, wriggling in his grasp. “And you bulked up. What, you one of those CrossFit junkies or something now?”

“C’mon, don’t insult me like that. Their form is terrible.”

“And you ditched the glass eye.”

“It was hurting. Figured I might as well let the lid close up and deal with it. Not like I could see from it anyway.”

But she laced her hands around the back of his neck and tapped just above his brow. Such easy physical intimacy. Oh, how he’d missed that! They’d always been the most handsy of the friend group, never shying away from each other. “I wasn’t complaining. You rock the pirate look, Captain.” 

Masamune snickered and clicked his tongue. “I’ll own that. I love some booty.”

With a roll of her eyes, she let the comment slide. “You busy? Wanna catch up?”

At last he let her slide from his arms, setting her feet on the ground. Why was the world so much colder when her body parted from his? “Hell yeah. Let me make you some gyoza and we’ll chat.”

[seanlowreyorigin]

Hello loves! C here, co-admin, and here to post an intro for my first bean, Sean. A little OOC info about me- I’m 28, my pronouns are she/her, and I am in the EST timezone! Just give this post a like and I’ll reach out for plotting! And, let me know if you’re interested in fulfilling any of my Wanted Connections!

Name: Sean Lane Lowrey  Age: 29 Birthdate: April 19, 1991 Occupation: Mechanic at Snowbury Auto Hometown: Chicago, Illinois Length of Stay in Snowbury: 7 years Sexuality: Heteroflexible Relationship Status: Single

tw drug use, tw alcohol use, tw illness, 

BIO -Sean Lane Lowrey was born on April 19, 1991 in Chicago, Illinois to Marsha and Peter Lowrey. His mother, Marsha, was a homemaker and his father owned and operated a successful auto repair shop.  -Repairing vehicles of any kind was something Sean spent countless hours and days doing with his father, learning all he could and bonding with the man. Their relationship grew from this, and a solid bond formed. Sean has always loved his dad more than anything.  -Sean also had a great relationship with his mother. The two were always close. She dedicated her life to making sure Sean was happy, healthy, and taken care of. Marsha supported him in everything he wanted to do- every club, every sport, every activity.  -Through elementary, middle, and half of high school, Sean excelled. He was popular, friendly, and academically gifted. It seemed he had the brightest of futures ahead of him. That was, until he met the girl he thought he’d spend the rest of his life with. -Sean met the girl through mutual friends, and the two hit it off instantly. At first, things were good, despite her wilder tendencies and proclivity for partying. That is to say, things were good until they weren’t. During the pair’s Senior year, Sean’s love began to spiral out of control, and became hooked on drugs and alchol. -At first, Sean did his best to help, to pull her from the hole she’d dug herself into. However, unfortunately, the opposite occurred. She dragged Sean right down with her, and it wasn’t long before he was hooked, too.  -Sean barely graduated, though went no further than that. In fact, after graduation, he didn’t go much of anywhere that didn’t involve his love or his dealer.  -Things were bad, and Sean’s parents feared for his life and future. Though try as they might, nothing seemed to get through to him. He was far too gone, and far too in love, to listen to reason.  -This went on for years, those years marked with many near-death experiences, homelessness, and sickness. It seemed the hole had no end. That was, until Sean’s love became pregnant. The couple was 21.  -Learning that he was going to be a dad flipped a switch within Sean, and in seemingly no time at all, he’d cleaned himself up completely. Having completely kicked his habits, he immediately enrolled in a local trade school and obtained his certifications in Auto Mechanics, before rejoining his father at the family’s shop.  -Despite Sean’s decision to turn his life around for the sake of his child, the woman did not. She continued partying, and although she kicked many of her habits (at least) during pregnancy, she did still smoke marijuana, and was more interested in hanging out with her friends at all hours of the night.  -When she gave birth to their daughter, Myleigh, full custody was given to Sean due to the drugs found in their systems. Still, Sean wanted to give the woman the chance to clean herself up, and to be a part of their daughter’s life. So, he stayed.  -One night, when Myleigh was only a few months old, Sean came home from work to find her mother completely strung-out, virtually non-responsive as his daughter laid nearby in her crib. Realizing his partner was never going to change, Sean did the only thing he knew to do. He packed both of their things, made a quick call to his parents, and disappeared.  -His father learned of an open position at the shop in Snowbury from a friend of a friend, and despite the position being virtually across the country, he decided to go.  -Myleigh is now 7-years-old, and Sean has been a single dad ever since. He has not heard from nor seen her mother since the night he left, and the only people who know where they are, are his parents. 

Wanted Connections -Sean would be interested in potentially seeing Myleigh’s mother though not for a love connection. He’d be interested in potentially working towards co-parenting, depending on whether or not she can prove she’s cleaned up enough to be in Myleigh’s life. -Sean is also looking for a best friend connection. This could be someone he works with, or someone he met in town. Either way, this person would be the only other individual to know the real story behind Sean’s move to Snowbury. -Sean would love to make some coworker connections as well- people who understand the stresses of the job, and just an overall good group to hang out with after work. 

[ren-meteor]

New Stuff

I decided to update Scorch’s bio and shit, so I shall leave it here

Name: Nelle Griogalach

Alias: Scorch

Organization: CSOR

Home Base: CFB Petawawa

Home Unit: 2nd Service Battalion

DoB: 02/02 (35 y/o)

Birthplace: Brisbane, Australia

Weight: 67 kg

Height: 1.72 m

Armour: 1

Speed: 3

Gadget: F.A.X. Grenades

Languages: English, French, German, Dari, Russian   

F.A.X. Grenades:

Separate from the diffuser, like C4, the grenade can be defused when the operator chooses. The grenade can be thrown or rolled under barricades. A low beeping can be heard after being thrown, and when detonated creates a massive blast wave. 

The FAX grenades can be stopped by Jaeger’s ADS, and the wireless detonator can be jammed by Mute’s router. 

If standing within a one meter range, you are immediately downed, and will burn for 2 h/p for 10 seconds, or until a teammate can help extinguish the flames. Animation takes 3 seconds to complete.

In the 2-3 meter range, player will catch fire and burn for 3 h/p for 15 seconds or until you pat down the flames which take 3 seconds to complete. 

The user and teammates are not immune to the FAX grenades

Primary Weapons:

C7-A2:

Damage- 62

Firerate- 725 full auto mode (can be switched between full auto, 3 round burst or semi auto)

Mobility- 50

Capacity- 30

Mossberg 590:

Damage- 48

Firerate- single shot

Mobility- 40

Capacity- 7

Secondary Weapons:

Sig Sauer p229:

Damage- 117

Firerate- single shot

Mobility- 50

Capacity- 10

Colt .45

Damage- 75

Firerate- single shot

Mobility- 50

Capacity- 6

Secondary Gadgets:

Breaching charge

Flash Grenade

BIOGRAPHY

“I get tired of it, you know? War. But it is the only thing I know.”

MWO Griogalach was born for the military. Both her parents, her father; Rear Admiral to the RCN, and her mother; a retired pilot from the RAAF, were major influences for her career path. Born an only child, she was well taken care of. Though a lot of the time her father was away sailing, Griogalach’s mother was always there after retiring and moving to Canada to support her husband. Her mother taught her to hunt when she was young, which is where her interest in weapons came from. 

She joined the army cadets as soon as she could, deciding her career path early on. Though during highschool, she found herself to have an affinity for science- more specifically chemistry. She graduated a year early, starting on her first of many degrees. Kinetics of Chemical Reaction, Kinetic Processes in Materials and Chemical Engineering at MIT, and Chemical Engineering and Applied Chemistry at the U of T, all while advancing her career as a Weapons Technician in the CAF. 

After finishing her degrees, she felt restless. She needed something more, so she signed up for additional specialty courses for her trade. She went on to train on the Leopard tank, GIAT light towed Howitzer, and then on to reconnaissance patrolling. To say she was well trained would be an understatement. With her skills, she was recommended by her chain of command to apply for CSOR; the Canadian Operations Regiment, which specializes in conducting raids, capturing strategic facilities and undertaking reconnaissance. During her time with the unit, she specialized in arctic and desert warfare. At every turn, Griogalach was challenging herself.

On top of all that, she developed her own specialized grenade. The FAX grenade. The fuel to air explosive was developed to help clear out tight and confined spaces- fox holes, tunnels, bunkers and caves. While overseas, it found its fair share of usage. 

Griogalach was deployed to Iraq in 2006 as a weapons tech. During her deployment she worked with the Americans, which is where she first encountered Trace. During their time together they worked closely, getting along from the get-go. There had been rumours of the two having a loose relationship while deployed, but neither would talk about it. Not because of bad blood; the two still get along fantastically. It was just the past. This was the time where she started developing her gadget, in which Trace had some input on it. She was one of the reasons he decided to go back to school, and from that point on they worked together on developing weapons for use by both militaries. 

After, she was quickly deployed again to Afghanistan. In 2008 as a weapons tech, then again from 2010-2011 with CSOR in Kandahar City. It was during her time with CSOR that she earned her moniker ‘Scorch’. It was her hard work, dedication and innovation during her deployment that earned her notice, and in 2016 joined the Rainbow team. 

PSYCHOLOGICAL REPORT

With the amount of training and experience that Griogalach has behind her, it brings me no surprise that despite the hesitation to take lead on missions, she is an incredible leader. A quick thinker and even quicker on her toes, she has the potential to be one of the best we have. However, during her tour on Kandahar she lost almost all of her squad- in a mission she led. This has planted a seed of ever growing doubt in her leadership skills in her mind. Not to mention whenever the topic comes up, she blames herself, and almost hits, what I like to call it, a reset. She turns cold, blames herself and throws herself into dangerous situations with no care for her own wellbeing. When this happens, I look into her eyes and see nothing- it’s so cold and indifferent. 

I tried to dig into the mission as much as I could, but the CAF has it sealed tightly. From what I could get, it was a lose-lose situation. She was commended for getting as much of her squad out as she did. Yet it is a sore spot for her. Sometimes I reread the report just because of the mission and the lessons we could learn from it. She was very well regarded in her unit, but the translation just isn’t there for her.  

I asked her why she chose to drive herself as hard as she did. Getting the amount of training, the schooling and whatnot. She told me of the stigma that comes with being a woman in the military, how she wanted to break it. The amount of times that her coworkers would talk down about her. Then there was the reputation of her parents. Her father; a Rear Admiral in the navy. One of the most well respected officers in his element. And her mother, a pilot from Australia. One of the first. There was a need to live up to expectations, and a want to impress. She pushes herself incredibly hard, to the point where it becomes dangerous, and she knows it. Thankfully, there are times where she recognizes this, and often goes to Imagawa for assistance. 

In her downtime, she is often found in the workshops, working on her gadgets and assisting other operators with theirs. During that time, she’s very approachable. I find that if I catch her in the middle of her work, she is more willing to converse. Though she has a hard exterior, some of  the other operators have taken a liking to her. She has good working relationships with Sanaa ‘Nomad’ El Maktoub, Lera ‘Finka’ Melnikova, Erik ‘Maverick’ Thorn, Adriano ‘Maestro’ Martello, Elena ‘Mira’ Maria Alvarez, Jordan ‘Thermite’ Trace, Dominic ‘Bandit’ Brunsmeier and unlike her fellow JTF2 counterparts, the Russians.

Now there is a whole other can of worms. But the one I was more interested in was her relationship with Brunsmeier. When in the eyes of others, they are nothing but professional with each other. But despite their discretion, there are a few times where if I happen to walk into the mess at the right time, the two of them are curled up on the couch together either watching TV or asleep. I approached the topic carefully during one of our sessions, but the closeness was denied. I wondered if there was a part of her that was scared to acknowledge it. If maybe they found some sort of similar comfort in the other. Either way, it seems after being together for a time they both come out of their shells.

[thelookingglassalice]

Generations Pt. 5

Previous 

Pairing: Bucky Barnes/Winter Soldier x Taya/OC

Warnings: None

Word Count: 1446

Square Filled: Threesome

Summary: Since the identity of the father is out, everyone is agreed that they need a day off. So Delilah gets her first trip to Central Park.

A/N: @star-spangled-bingo  @avengerscompound @lillianfromaccounting@patzammit @mumbles411 @until-theend-oftheline @nikkimarie (If you’d like to be tagged just ask)

 “If Stark doesn’t stop referring to Delilah as ‘the result of our threesome’ I’m going to have to hurt him just a little.” Bucky read a text message that Tony had sent to the group.

“I had a threesome all by myself. How depressing is that?” Taya stirred her coffee and leaned her butt against the counter. 

“She sleeping?” Bucky was surprised and slightly disappointed they’d made it through the night without him.

“She’s excited for her day out. Not that being trapped in here for five months hasn’t been wonderful. It’s not like her mommy is ready to steal a car to get out of this place.” Taya eyed Bucky as she sipped her drink. 

“I think after the results we all need some fun. Maybe not grand theft auto, but we’ll see how the day goes.“ Bucky shrugged.

To say the results of the blood tests had just complicated things, was an understatement. Delilah’s DNA was chaotic. Bruce was still trying to make sense of it. Bucky, Steve, and Taya were all represented in the child. There were traces of something that resembled the serum Steve had been given, but it had different chemical markers. 

In scientific terms, the kid didn’t make sense. Period. Bruce had noticed some acceleration in her cellular growth and requested a possible PET scan to see how her brain was functioning. When he was met with the glaring of the parents, Bruce had suggested they wait a few days on that. Natasha and Clint were working their intel connections harder and even Tony was doing some long-distance hacking to help the search for the experiment records.

Scientific shit aside. Steve and Bucky now had a child together and with a woman, they never met until a few months ago. Odd that it wasn’t the most outrageous thing to ever happen to them. Steve had suggested they get the hell out of the compound and do something for Delilah’s birthday.

“Where exactly are you and Steve taking us today?” Taya cocked an ear, listening for Delilah.

“Not sure. Is she too little to ride the Cyclone?” Bucky asked.

“Maybe we save Coney Island for when she’s a little older.” Taya laughed. 

“Fine. Central Park it is.” Bucky nodded.

“That sounds nice.  I’m going to grab a shower since sleeping beauty is still out.” Taya headed down the hall. Bucky smiled as he watched her go. 

Steve arrived while Taya was getting dressed. Delilah had woken up and Bucky had gotten her some breakfast. Now he was trying to figure out how the stroller Tony had brought worked. 

“Morning...what’s that?” Steve greeted them.

“Stark said it was a stroller but it has a fucking motor on it.” Bucky eyed the thing carefully. 

“Yeah.” Delilah nodded emphatically

“Can you say that around her?” Steve picked Delilah up and she offered him a Cheerio.

“I don’t think she understands it. And if she does, don’t say it.” Bucky pointed a finger at her.

“Kay.” Delilah went back to force-feeding Steve cereal.

“If that thing hovers she’s not going in it,” Steve mumbled around the pieces of Cheerio. “Thank you, that’s enough.”

“Hey, Steve.” Taya came in with a diaper bag. “Can you put a few toys in here? I’m going to get her dressed. Issues with the stroller?

“I’m not sure it’s a stroller,” Bucky explained. 

“Is that a refrigerator on that thing?” Taya traded Steve Delilah for the bag and went to get her ready.

“Taking a kid out shouldn’t be this complicated.” Bucky frowned.

“Really. A couple of hundred-year-old super soldiers taking their scientifically created offspring and her ex-spy assassin mother to the park should be way easier.” Steve suppressed a smirk as he decided which toys to put in the bag.

“This is not the threesome I ever pictured.” Bucky was also holding back a smile now.

“Hey,  You could do worse. I’ll have you know that’s America’s ass pal.” Steve winked.

“I’d salute it but my hands are full.” Taya deadpanned as she returned with the baby.

“Maybe later then.” Steve shrugged as Bucky hit one last button on the stroller. 

The stroller unfolded itself gracefully and a screen lit up between the handles. Bucky poked the screen and it started to talk. It ran through the weather outlook, child-friendly activities available today, the temperature of the stroller seat and onboard refrigerator compartment, then waited for a command.

“Okay, there’s no chance of that becoming sentient and taking over Manhattan, right?” Taya narrowed her eyes as Steve and Bucky shared a look. “What?”

--

“I think we wore her out.” Steve pulled the canopy up, exposing Delilah.

“Looks like it.” Bucky leaned sideways as they walked to look at her. 

“Two nights in a row I’ll get to sleep.” Taya clapped.

The group was working their way back to where they had parked after all day at the park. It had gone better than anyone had expected. The nice thing about being enhanced was that no one got tired from the miles of walking. Although, Delilah had her stroller and Taya was leaning on Bucky. 

They had begun the day at the zoo, where Delilah tried to convince her mom they needed to take a sea lion home. Bucky had compromised and bought her a huge stuffed sea lion which was currently riding on top of her in the stroller. 

The animals had all been very interested in Delilah, they had tried to come close to her as they could and those in habitats had pressed up against the barrier to see her. Luckily, no one seemed to notice but Taya filed it away to worry about later. After the zoo, they made a long trek to a playground for toddlers. Delilah had climbed eagerly out of her stroller and joined the other kids in the sprinkler feature and exploring everything she could.

The adults had sat near the sandbox, eyes on her at all times. But they couldn’t help and enjoy her little bit of freedom crawling and climbing. She had come to the sandbox and was digging a hole when a bigger kid knocked her over, wanting her toy she was burying and unburying in the hole. Steve and Bucky had both tensed, but Delilah got up scowled at the boy and stomped over to the grown-ups.

“He bad. I hit?” Delilah asked them.

“No. But I’m sure Steve will help you get the toy back.” Bucky brushed off Delilah’s hands and nodded to Steve.

“Hm, I got this.” Steve followed Delilah to where the kid had her toy. Bucky and Taya watched with amusement. “Excuse me, son? I think you have her toy.”

“No, I-” The boy looked up, recognized Captain America and dropped the toy.

“Tank you.” Delilah grinned at the boy and skipped back to her stroller.

“So much for being low-key.” Taya helped buckle Delilah in as Steve rejoined them.

“We were getting ready to leave anyway.” Bucky clapped Steve on the back.

“Carousel?” Steve asked.

That was where they went next and then they ended the day at Victorian Gardens.

“We didn’t even get to the other side of the park.” Bucky was enjoying the weight of Taya leaning on him. Her arm was wrapped around one of his to keep herself upright.

“Next week.” Steve stopped the stroller next to the car. “We should just get a place in the city.”

“I thought you had one.” Taya frowned.

“The lease lapsed a month ago.” Steve chuckled. “When I’m in the city I crash at Clint’s so I don’t have to drive all the way back.”

“Don’t want to live with us?” Bucky teased as he handed Taya the huge stuffed sea lion and unbuckled Delilah.

“You were the one looking at apartments in Brooklyn before these two showed up.” Steve grabbed the diaper bag. “How can you afford that?”

“I was going to have you co-sign the lease.” Bucky dropped his voice as he picked up Delilah with a grin.

“Good schools in Brooklyn?” Taya asked from where she was shoving the stuffy into the trunk. It didn’t want to fit so Steve came around as Bucky got Delilah in her car seat. 

“Yeah, Steve, why don’t you get a place and we’ll all just crash there.” Bucky slid next to Delilah.

“Ice cream,” Delilah muttered in her sleep. Bucky stroked her hand, soothing her and she grabbed one of his fingers,

“Considering it.” Steve climbed into the driver’s seat and Taya into the passenger side.

“Did anyone else see the animals trying to follow her today?” Taya asked.

[space--wrecked]

Been thinking about Gary today more than usual and I keep asking ppl this but... what do you think Gary’s past looked like before the sentence?

Whoo! Okay sorry I took a year and day to reply back but I had to refine my college thesis on the origins of Gary Goodspeed: The Tragedy of The Florida Man

-Gary was far more mentally stable as child than as an adult. The loss of John royally screwed him up and stunted him emotionally. Being the imaginative fellow that he is, Gary had numerous career aspirations and couldn’t decide on which he wanted to pursue when he got older. One particular field that interested him was entomology (study of insects), as evidenced by his vast collection of insects he kept in his tree house. He garnered a bit of reputation for his affinity towards the smaller critters of nature at his school (namely they thought he was a weirdo, the “bug boy”) .He went on various bug hunts, likening his backyard adventures to his father’s space missions. He would pretend to be an astronaut exploring new worlds and becoming friends with the “aliens” there. Today, he could recite to you the various bug facts and trivia he accumulated over his youth if anyone asked him.

-There was always a bit of loneliness in Gary’s life. While John at least made an effort to be there for his son more it would appear that his mother had zero interest in trying to connect with her son. John claimed it was because she was always away at “work” which required a lot of “business trips”. Gary believed in it just because it was more comforting to him to think she busy rather than neglecting him. Usually Gary was left in the care of a robot nanny and the comfort of his TV. He would marathon this channel that showcased the classic era of television and cinema (namely the 21st century).  It was there where he began to developed a passion for dance as he binged various 80s musicals and more.

-After John’s passing and his mother gone, Gary was left to fend for himself. It wasn’t so bad at first, he told himself.  There was still electricity, food, and running water. If he could just get passed the emptiness of his house, he could manage. He would leave the TV on so at least he could pretend there was someone in the room with him. He prayed every night for his mother to return, if just to have someone there. But the days passed and his resources began to dwindle. With unpaid bills mounting, out went the electricity and the water, his food supply rotted. And the reality weighed on him then, when he was left in that dark empty house: he was alone. Completely and utterly alone. So he lived in his tree house. He ate off the land or whatever scraps he could steal from his neighbors and was lulled to sleep by the sounds of insects. But even then, the loneliness would gnawed at him. After he torched his home, Gary took to nature.

-Like any Floridian, Gary held a deep spiritual connection with the swamp. He considered himself kin to the gators that lived there and often swam with them. Feeling a connection with the insects surrounding him, he let them feast on his flesh and blood. Gary became the thing of legend, a cryptid in his own right: The Florida Man. 

-After his many, many, many, many, MANY, misadventures Gary was caught by a downtrodden mechanic, proprietor to a small auto repair shop. He was surprised to see this slender twink emerging from the bushes only to then realize that this was the man, the myth, the legendary Florida Man.  He could only pray that Gary wasn’t there to steal, set fire to, or start break dancing on his hover cars. That was until he saw him eating out of his trash. One could even say he took pity on the young lad and the mechanic decided to take Gary in and teach him his trade so that Gary start to enter back into society and hopefully find a place for himself in civilization. 

-But the Gang Life had called upon Gary Goodspeed and no one could ignore the call of destiny. The gang in question had offered Gary to work in their chop shop, even steal some of his mentor’s cars to sell for parts in the black market. Gary at first declined, seeing that his life was starting to get back on track and for once he could have some normalcy.  But business wasn’t doing so well and soon both him and his mentor would be out of jobs and Gary didn’t want to go down that path again. The decision to go behind his mentor’s back was one that ate away at his conscience (even to this day) but at the time he thought in some screwed up way this was how he could repay him for helping him. Gary accepted.

- Gary would lie and claim that whatever was missing was “sold” and would show the money he earned from the stolen goods as proof of purchase. His mentor was so proud of him, business was booming and Gary continued to live in denial. He needed a distraction from all this. He started hanging out with the gang more, playing cards with them, going to bars, etc. He became quite the gambler, seeing that he now had money to burn. He started to rekindle his fondness for dance and decided to take ballet classes on his down time. He would also go to rave parties. A lot of them. With glowsticks everywhere on his person, he looked like a neon Gumbo whenever he would walk into the club. The crew stopped taking him to strip clubs because they didn’t want to hear Gary’s running commentary on the girls choreography and form when all they wanted to see were technicolor tittes.

-Things would eventually take a turn for the worse however, as his mentor eventually realized the underground operation Gary was apart of and where the source of his income was really coming from. All the guilt that Gary had been racking up and stowing away came forth in a flood as he tried to make a million excuses as to why he did it but his mentor didn’t want to hear it.  Gary knew where this was headed before his mentor called the cops on him and he ran away. He ran and ran, knowing the bridge he burned, and didn’t look back.

-Annnd the rest pretty much follows where we last see him before his arrest. At one point Gary flew too close to the sun and racked up a lot of debt from all his crimes and tried to burn that bridge down but too but ultimately that got him imprisoned.

[imagining-sio]

Escapism I

Chapter one: Wlecome to Mount Eaton

I’ve always loved a biker!bucky Au so viola...

Bucky Barnes x reader

——————————————————————————

It was the perfect place to vanish. The whole town was nestled between the mountains at one end, and the lakeside off to the other. The only border was thick dense woodland. One where people who search for Bigfoot would only dream of going.

The town itself was a small four stoplight kind of place. It was the “They kept the old buildings in their original paint because it held charm” kind of place. A far reach from the hustle and bustle of where I once called home. I gripped the steering wheel as I drove down the mountainside. The olive green ford bronco held all the contents I wanted to take with me. All that I couldn’t find myself living without. It was a depressingly small amount. However over the course of my trip across states I had accumulated quite a bit.

I knew what was waiting for me in this sleepy town, as I drive through it I could see a few heads turned, given they had never seen my vehicle before. I could only give a tight lipped smile as I kept driving toward the outskirts of town, near the lakeside.

I pulled up onto the inclined street of my new residence, and was surprised to find a gathering of motorcycles on one side. There was a house on either side. The house accompanied by at least 8 motorcycles was bustling with life. The garage was blaring old classic rock music, it was his kind of music. I felt a chill run up my spine at the thought.

I turned my attention to the small house across the street. I recognized the small sedan from the realtor three weeks ago; back when I was motel hopping. The middle aged woman was busy on her phone glaring in sustain at the neighbors across the street.

I placed my vehicle in park in the driveway, taking a deep inhale before hopping out of my beloved Oliver.

“Miss Y/L/N; so good to see you again! I just came by to drop off your keys to your home.” The woman sauntered up to me as she finished her text.

“Thank you for meeting me. I’m sorry we couldn’t do this earlier. I just want to thank you for letting the movers in when I wasn’t here.” I smiled gratefully, letting my fingers drift over the keys. This was my house. This was to be my home. My new start.

“Oh it’s no trouble dear! You didn’t need to pay me extra for that. I know it’s hard getting your things across state lines at the same time.” She dismissed me with a small chuckle. She clearly liked the extra pay, as in she had only told me now about how it was extra.

“Well thank you again.”

“Just one last thing before you go sweetie. Be careful with your new neighbor. They are not particularly liked round town.”

My brows furrowed, and I peered across her shoulder toward the crowded garage. The music somehow got louder, and was project across the street. Truthfully, any noise complaint could be solved by telling them to turn it down.

“Why is that?” I asked.

“Honey, they are a biker gang.” She handed me a card; “This is my husband’s company card, I’ll put in a good word for you to get a security system.”

With that she went back to her luxury sedan and drive off. She didn’t mention that on the house tour, then again they weren’t there. Also that would explain why the house itself was dirt cheap, Apart from lack of curb appeal.

‘Just as long as they don’t come bothering me there won’t be a problem,’ I told myself. I walked up to the porch and unlocked the front door. Apparently my realtor also took up interior decorating. The place was arranged in all the wrong ways, there was barely any life in it. Once I got my stuff settled I would be sure to move it.

I couldn’t beat the backyard view, though. I had a lovely fire pit to stargaze with my telescope. The house was surround by the tall tall trees, and the music from across the street was muffled by the sound of the lake and the trees. A small dock led out far enough to dive right into the waters. Though I doubt, with how frigid the weather is right now, I would do that.

Still; it felt like I belonged here. That was a good omen at least.

I walked back and forth between the trunk of Oliver and my new home, every now and then glancing at my neighbors; intently watching for any movement toward my side of the street. As I went to grab the last box of my belongings, I noticed the garage was dispersing toward the curb.

It was quite the eclectic bunch, they were mostly broad shouldered, well built people all around. They certainly differed in height, ranging from my height, which was about five foot five inches; to the two tallest being about six foot seven. The eight of them planting themselves onto their respective bikes. They all however were giving me a kind smile, and a small wave before they rode off. At first I don’t know how to respond, but I simply just gave a small waving acknowledgment gesture akin to theirs and went on with my business. By this time it was just about sunset.

When I came back out to close Oliver up and place him in the old garage I found a lone figure, most likely my new neighbor; from his detached garage toward his matte black mailbox. He had on a leather jacket, black in color, under it a grey shirt. His pants were fraying at the knee, most likely from overuse.

He had this air about him, a cockiness. Whether it was from the cigarette that dangled between his lips; or the way he dismissively glitter through his mail. Something about him was both intriguing and at the same time, not.

I shut the trunk with a heavy sigh, purging my thoughts, not even sparing a second glance as I went to shut my front door.

—————————-——————————————

It had been two whole months since I moved here. By that time I had grown accustomed to the town, and them to me. The local florist began to supply succulents after I expressed my interest; thus the reason for my increased cactus collection. It also brought him more business with the children round town, or at least those with internet access.

The general store was the hub for everything groceries and town social meetings. The suburbanites would occasionally paruse into town, but only for school functions. Everyone and their mother was so intrigued to find out just why I, a young single woman with no children, had decided to move here. They were also interested about why I moved across the street from the local gang of bikers. They were more adamant about the latter.

Truthfully, I hadn’t had any trouble from my neighbor, or his budding social life. I wasn’t the only other young single woman in town, his nightly company was a clear indication of that fact. A new woman almost every other night. I never told anyone else that, mainly because I expected they already knew.

My job at the bookstore was perfect; everyone in town loved it because it doubled as a coffee shop. When you bought a coffee, you could also take a book off the shelves to read, as long as you left it at the table when you were finished, wed put it back. If you wanted to buy it, you could do that too.

I was probably the youngest employee these people ever had; by the looks of the town, not many young people were looking for a job here. However, the owners, an elderly married couple, happily accepted me. They were like the great aunt and uncle I never had. It was a refreshing spin from my old job, and I could still pursue my hobbies in the lulls between the breakfast and lunch rush.

“Y/N dear, would you mind closing up tonight?” Edna, the owner and coworker piped up from the back.

“Not at all,” I wrote down the order of the tall blonde in front of me, asking myself why someone should name their child Thor. His accent was Norwegian, so I couldn’t really fault them there. Then again, I’m not about to pick a fight with the leather clad lumberjack.

“What book would you like, sir?” I asked, as was routine.

“The Silmarinion if you have it.” He smiled warmly. Couldn’t fault him for having great literary taste either.

“Edna! One coffee with milk; Two lattes, one iced tea, a hot chocolate, and one black coffee to go if you’d please!” I called.

“Oh! Thor’s back?” I’ve never seen a 72 year old move so fast. I chuckled as I went to find the book he requested. I searched through the aisles, with no such luck. I remembered that someone else had asked for the book and they had already left. Perhaps it was on one of the tables outside, it was a bright day and the weather just right. I walked outside and checked the outdoor tables, finding the book instantly.

As I went to reach for the book, the roar of an engine made me jump. I couldn’t understand how a bookstore coffee shop was so close to an auto part store garage that loud, and still have such healthy business. I glared at the storefront, it’s open garage adjacent to our windowed storefront. ‘Barnes & Rogers’ had to be some sort of trademark infringement. The amount of motorcycles outnumbered the automobiles. The music radiators from the shop with a heavy rock and roll base you could feel from across the street.

I could only glare as I went back on with my day. I handed the book in question to the large burly man.

“Here we are.” I said with a smile. He gave a wide smile and a thank you before taking a seat. I went back behind the counter to help place the coffees into the to go bags.

“Y/N would you be a darling and help Thor deliver the drinks to his coworkers.” Edna wrote the respective orders onto the cups before placing them in their carriers; “My husband usually does it but he’s out sick today.”

“Sure, lemme just take the apron off.” I undid the bow around my waist and hung the emerald apron upon a hook.

“Thor honey; Thomas is out today, so Y/N volunteered to help you today.” She hand him one of the carriers. He traded her with the book, giving a grateful and gruff thank you.

“This way, Y/N,” he said with a bright smile. It was like he was a big teddy bear disguised as a lumberjack god. He held the door open for me as we walked down the street. It was nice, until I figured out where we were headed.

“So I hear you are the new girl? Yes?” He tried to make polite small talk.

“Yes I am? But you don’t sound like your from around here either?” I shot back playfully. He laughed.

“Indeed I am not, but I like it here. It reminds me of home.” He smiled fondly.

“That’s good.”

“How do you like your new home?”

“I couldn’t ask for better. The house is just the right amount of space for me.”

“And Bucky?”

“Who the hell is bucky?” I asked.

“You haven’t met your neighbor yet?” He quirked a brow. So that was his name. What is it with this town and their oddly named people?

“It appears I have not.” I said dryly, still somewhat grateful I hadn’t.

“Well we’ll soon fix that.” He opened the door for me as we walked into the shop. He ushered me through another door and we were both smack dab in the center of the auto shop.

There was a loft which led to what looked to be the office of the place. Cars were either on jacks high enough for the men to work below them, or being torn apart. Sometimes it was both. A few of the motorcycles were being worked on. And other people were fabricating iron. The sparks flew on the other end of the large shop. I watched as the masked figure welded metal together. The yellow glow making a heavily aura.

“Barnes!” His voice boomed like thunder; “coffee is here!”

“About damn time!” Voices chimed together. I watched as the welder looked up before setting the equipment aside. He removed his gloves and torn off his mask, revealing the head of brunette locks.

Of course my neighbor was the one I was ogling; How else could god make it more awkward for me?

“Who’s the girl?” The first man to approach said slyly. His smile was warm and kind. His hair was clipped close to his head, and a healthy stubble grown along his goatee.

“This is Y/N,” Thor explained, whilst handing the man his drink.

“As in the Shithead’s new cute neighbor he’s too afraid to talk to?” He raised a brow, as well as a smirk.

“Indeed;” Thor nodded with the same expression.

“I’m gonna get some mileage outta this.” He sipped his coffee before turning his attention toward me.

“Hi, I’m Sam Wilson. You can refer to me as the handsome one.” He joked. I chuckled, shaking his hand with a smile.

“Nice to meet you.”

“He isn’t be too bothersome is he?” Another tall blonde walked up, his hair a lot shorter than Thor’s. His white shirt was stained with grease and oil. He had a towel thrown over his shoulder, what he probably used to wipe his hands with. He himself looked vaguely familiar, but I couldn’t place where.

“Not at all.”

“Here I’ll take that.” He gestured to the coffee carrier. I gratefully handed it to him.

“How you liking the house?” He asked, handing out the beverages to their respective owners. My eyes widened at the question, before quickly going into fight or flight mode.

“Excuse me?” I began to pale.

“Oh, sorry! That sounded really weird!” He quickly apologized.

“Well done Rogers.” Sam sipped his coffee to hide his smile.

“Can it Wilson.” He elbowed the man.

“I meant was we were there when you finished moving in. I mean, we’re always at Bucky’s house anyway, so we’re bound to see you on occasion.” He scratched the back of his neck.

Rogers. As in the name of the shop. And whom is a frequent to my mysterious neighbor. The one who is a leader of a biker gang. Who co owns the shop with Rogers. Which I am standing in and handing out coffee to.

Fucking hell. Don’t die just talking to them. Play it off somehow dammit.

“Oh! Right! Yeah, that doesn’t sound so weird after explaining it.” I said with nervous chuckle; “I do love the house, I can’t complain.”

I most definitely could complain, but not in front of them.

“Hey Barnes, come get your shit coffee!” Sam hollered toward my neighbor.

“I’m coming!” He yelled back dismissively ruffling his hair out of his low bun. His long sleeved black shirt stuck to him like a second skin, in which I felt bad for the seams.

“Come meet your neighbor while your at it. How come you never told us she was so cute!” Sam said condescendingly, only adding to the mans annoyance.

“What the hell are you talking about you fu-“ his cut short mid syllable as soon as he locked eyes with me. Me, in my striped three quarter shirt and jeans looking like a French tourist. The only pop of color was a pair of red sneakers due to my job description.

Him, in his taught black shit and dark washed jeans that looked like they were too tight around his thighs. His hair the perfect length to still be short and place in a bun without looking too creepy. The blue eyes that contained more depth than the ocean itself.

“Hi, I’m Y/N,” I outstretched my hand.

“Bucky,” he ignored me and walked toward Rogers for his coffee.

“Bucky, manners,” Rogers held his beverage out of reach.

“Screw you Steve; give me my coffee.” He clearly was irritated.

“Manners; then coffee.” The blonde said sternly, holding the cup close to his mouth. The brunette growled, sending goosebumps up my arms.

“Stop acting like you drink coffee Steve, we all know you won’t do it.” The brunette smirked. I guess I know who ordered the hot chocolate.

“My point still stands.”

“Nice to meet you too, Y/N,” he glared at Steve, who had maneuvered behind me, as he shook my hand.

“It’s nice to be met; I can’t say the same for you at the moment,” I couldn’t stop the sarcasm from spewing out my mouth. A silence fell over the room. The brunette in front of me gave a surprised look, our hands still clasped together. The tension made me start to sweat.

And then the room was filled with laughter once again. It flooded the entire plain.

“I like her,” Sam patted his hand upon my back. Steve at last handed James his coffee, and the man sulked back angrily over to his corner where he resumed welding.

“I think that was the first time I’ve seen Barnes speechless,” Steve spoke with a fond smile.

“Thor! Bring her around more often!,” another man, shorter with spiky hair shouted as he walked away; “wen need someone to keep Barnes’ ego in check!”

“I heard that!”

“Are you always like this?” I asked Steve. He shrugged.

“Pretty much, Besides me or Sam; Buck is in charger of the shop.”

“What he means to say; is that we’re pretty much one big happy family.” Sam three his arm around Steve’s shoulder.

“I’m not happy,” The spiky blonde spoke up again.

“Oh my god Clint! We know! You’re never happy until you see your wife and kids every night! Jesus you are whipped, man” Sam and the man Clint walked off, laughing as they did.

I could only glance at the man in the corner I had just met. He barely spoke a word to me, and yet I somehow found out more about him in the time he hadn’t spoke.

I could only watch as he finished the piece he was welding together, sliding his goggles up further upon his forehead. He stared at the piece with great scrutiny, making sure what he had was perfect. The intestity of those blue eyes. It had an effect upon me.

The same way a lamb had when facing a wolf, especially when those big blue eyes were on you.

[blankdblank]

My Pearl Pt 8

Pt 1 - Pt 2 - Pt 3 - Pt 4 - Pt 5 - Pt 6 - Pt 7 -

Howl of a wolf – naule

Tags –

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…

“Today is Monday?”

Lowly against your neck Thorin sighed at the end of another gentle kiss he had left there, “Mhmm.” Your subtle nod and spike in pulse made him lift his head to peer up at you only to have his brows furrow at your curious expression, “What happens on Monday?”

A dart of his tongue wet his lips and his body adjusted to prop himself up on his elbows around you as you said, “I have a delivery today. One, that might upset you.”

He raised a brow asking, “What could you have ordered that could possibly upset me?”

After wetting your lips you stated, “I meant to tell you earlier, when I was still in Hillcrest, I was still a teenager, and, I was dating a guy. He said everything I needed to hear,” Thorin nodded hoping his worst assumptions were true, “I got pregnant, and,” he wet his lips, “Well he didn’t want anything to do with me after he got what he wanted, and I was so scared my Gran would disown me but she didn’t. She was ready to help me but she passed shortly after. His father was the Dean at Hillcrest, did all he could to get me kicked out, and I found out Gran sent out my resume and I got in at Orcarni. They were willing to grant me a break when I was due in my second year there, about nine months in, I got sick and they gave me some meds I didn’t know I was allergic to.” His arms folded around your sides at the tears in your eyes, “I lost him.”

“Jaqi..” He softly whispered.

“I was young and all of Gran’s property went to Ecthellion till I was old enough to claim it, and the hospital kept asking how I was going to pay for it all-,” At your voice cracking he sat up against the pillows beside you easing you onto his chest so he could hold you when you began to tremble.

“By chance after about twelve hours of me bawling my eyes out, Tuvork Stonefoot passed by my room hearing one of the nurses lecturing me on hospital policy and that I had to make a decision. He came in got her to leave me alone, his great granddaughter had just been born the night before, and his whole family came in seeing how young and alone I was.” He nodded wiping away your next set of tears, recognizing the name of a great line of jewelers among his kin, “They paid for it all, and volunteered to make me a mithril ring with diamonds from his ashes and the small vile of my Gran’s I had.”

Thorin’s lips parted, “It took me fifty years in that auto shops run by his great nephew for me to pay it all back, along with the price for the auto trade school they paid for so I could earn it back faster.” A hint of a smile eased onto his lips mirroring your growing smile as you let out a teary chuckle, “So, you are not the first Dwarf to be impossibly generous to me.”

He wet his lips then asked, “The delivery? They’ve kept your ring all this time?”

You shook your head, “No,” you flashes him another teary smile, “Lifetime maintenance and cleaning, they fly out to collect them every twenty years. Turo is supposed to be here today, if you don’t mind my sending this address.”

He shook his head, “Of course not. This is our home. I have heard of their work, beyond compare to most races, it must have been grueling working that off, mithril is-,”

“Honestly I still think he under quoted me on what it costs. So I’ve spent the past two centuries collecting what I could to donate back to them since they refuse to charge me for anything.”

Thorin chuckled easing you higher on his chest kissing your forehead, “How much do you have to donate this time?”

“Three thousand.”

He nodded and kissed your nose, “I’ll add to that.”

“I-..” His lips gently pressed to yours and his hand stroked your cheek lovingly.

“This would not be the first time I’ve donated to them. Our kin have an annual drive to help ease the costs for families in situations like yours, unfortunately burials are quite costly and the Stonefoot clan are among the few so at ease with donating what they can. Blue Mountains have annual drives as well and the Iron Hills have their own companies run by the Stiffbeards.” With another stroke of your cheek he asked, “What is his name?”

“Naule. It means Howl of the Wolf.”

“Why did you choose that name?”

“They let me keep holding him on the drive over, until I had to hand him over after their traditional eulogy. I thought I’d lose it entirely when I heard the furnaces kick up,” his hand rose to wipe your cheek again, “But their shop was out in the woods, and the moon was rising and all I could hear was these packs of wolves singing to the moon. It was beautiful. I always loved wolves growing up, we had a golden pack by our home that would nap on our land by the stream passing through, they were so docile and kind. Even the Dwarves thought it was a sign of some sort.”

He chuckled and stated, “My middle name means Battle Ram.” You raised a brow and  he chuckled again. “Amad went into labor and on the drive over Adad had to stop, there were all these mountain goats led by the herd rams that had broken out of their pens, wandered for miles, but they heard Amad and their leader peered in through the window and bellowed making them clear a path.”

You giggled, “That is adorable. I thought it would be from you head butting someone.”

Thorin laughed, “That, is a common Dwarf habit I am afraid.” You smiled through a giggle and snuggled against his chest and he growled the question you hoped he wouldn’t ask, “What happened to your ex?”

You shrugged on his chest, “Never heard from him after my confirming sonogram when I was three months in.”

His chin settled on your head through a growling exhale making you smile and snuggle closer to his radiating warmth, “Not good, but. Good.”

“When did you want to go to Bombur’s?”

“Hmm, Dis should be there now, so an hour or so, give her time to swoon over our new Pebble.” He wet his lips then asked, “You did want to come?”

You peered up at him and nodded, “If you’d like me to. I can’t promise I won’t tear up if she offers me her foot, seems to always free the tears. But then again my Gran had the same reaction. Such little feet, and don’t even get me started on the clothes.” Making Thorin chuckle then turn his head at the doorbell, wetting his lips he helped you up and offered you one of his sweaters to pull over your shorts when you shirt was nowhere to be found. Behind you he walked after tugging on his jeans and your chef cat shirt from his closet, with hands raised to brush his hair back over his back as you answered the door. A smile eased onto your face as the tan haired Dwarf smiled at you widely as you let him inside, “Turo, morning.”

Turo, “Morning.” In a shift of his hands he brought the lock box he was holding to set down onto the table along the wall. After claiming the clip board you signed in the usual places while he unlocked the box and drew out a smaller polished mahogany box with your name etched in golden letters into the lid he unlocked with a second key also marked with your runes along the handle. A soft click later the box opened to reveal a spiraled set of white gem coated woven mithril bands with a large white gem surrounded by eight arched bands forming petals of a flower around it also bearing the same white gems.

The ring sat safely inside a black velvet lined indent keeping it snuggly in place, without touching it he turned the box to you and smiled as you eased the ring back onto your right ring finger freeing him to seal the boxes again. Lowly after a chuckle he rumbled, “Finally, a hand off without-,”

His eyes narrowed as you drew out a sealed envelope through your challenging grin, “It isn’t much, but your kin deserve it for all you’ve done for me.”

A grin eased back onto his lips accepting the envelope he slid through the slit on the side of the box for donations along the way before his eyes turned to Thorin as he said, “And your kin can expect a larger donation from me this year as well.” Turo nodded and accepted your parting hug with a chuckle after accepting the autograph he had sheepishly requested for his younger sister a few minutes before from Thorin then headed out to his waiting truck.

Alone again Thorin grinned gently accepting your hand to inspect your ring with an adoring smile taking in the craftsmanship. Your raised finger drew his eyes to yours for a moment as you said. “One more thing,” softly your hand began to glow and the sliver of something he saw inside the center stone shimmered revealing an image of a baby boy resting across both of your palms with limbs curled around his body and head seemingly asleep making his lips part in awe at how beautiful he was, even being that small. “They were shocked he was that big, but it was rumored Dunne wasn’t actually his father’s son, but the town printer’s, a Man.”

Thorin chuckled and peered at the boy adoringly until you let your glow dim hiding the image again when your chest started to sting at the loss again. In a low hum he circled you in his arms and kissed your cheek, “My Dearest, how about I make us something to eat? Hmm?”

You nodded and joined him in the kitchen to share the meal and clean up before changing to go over to Bombur’s. In your few minutes apart he sent a message ahead about your ring that rippled through the clan like a wildfire, he didn’t share who the ring was meant for but simply that you had it so none would tread across the painful topic unless you wished to share it yourself.

Staying in Thorin’s sweater you pulled on your jeans, socks and a pair of boots easily slipped off if asked to. In the hall when you met up with Thorin again he chuckled at your arms easing around his neck to claim another kiss, “I’m sorry if I dampened the celebration for you.”

He shook his head grinning at you after a kiss of his own, “Thank you for sharing it with me.” His grin grew as he purred, “Now lets go coat you with bearded Pebbles.”

You couldn’t help but grin asking, “How bearded?” The only answer you got was another deep chuckle.

.

Just down the street you felt a smile ease onto your face at the vast number of Durins again welcoming you among them and through to the inside of the house where Thorin led you straight to Bombur and Bella on the couch surrounded by their older children who all turned with smiles up at you on your approach. Each one named themselves then tugged you off through the house to show off their rooms, in a glance back at Thorin you motioned to the smallest boy tugging on your pant leg then mimed along with your fingers mouthing, “Mustache!” A wide grin eased onto his lips through a deep chuckle before he turned to face Bombur with a knowing light in his eyes matching Thorin’s, clearly already seeing the love he had for you. All noting his clear proud stance and blatant flaunting of his shirt widening their smiles and starting up another betting pool to see what you might gift him next.

Bombur, “I see you’ve settled nicely.”

Beside him Bella asked peering at the rest of their brood rushing after you, then back to Thorin, “I take it it wasn’t her Grandmother’s ashes for the ring?”

Thorin wet his lips then answered, “Part of it, but not the main source.”

Bombur gave his arm a gentle tug easing his cousin onto the cushion beside him asking, “Any thoughts on a Pebble of your own yet? Fili did mention her shot the other day, however you are fairly new so there is plenty of time to settle into forming a family.”

Thorin chuckled then stated, “Obviously I have, only a fool wouldn’t see how blessed a child would be to have her as its Amad. Though it has just been a few weeks and there is much ground to cover before we discuss forming a family.”

Bella chuckled, “We aren’t always allowed time for discussion.”

Making Thorin chuckle and nod again, “True.”

Not a minute later you were brought back and set at Thorin’s side while Dis made a circle back to pass the Pebble back to Bella. Only to see you and Thorin’s grin at the mustache bearing boy on his lap peering up at him proudly boasting of a cupcake he helped his Amad make and fill with fruit before adding the chocolate icing on top. Your soft giggles grew then paused at his sister at Thorin’s knee taking your hand from your knee to inspect your ring saying softly, “Pretty, did uncle buy this?”

You shook your head, “No, I’ve had it a really long time.”

She looked about near to pouting at her soft, “Oh.”

Thorin reached out tapping her nose saying, “There is time for buying jewelry later.”

Dis’ eyes scanned over you on her way to Bella’s side saying, “Vili said I have to return her.”

Bella chuckled then shifted her eyes to you asking with a grin, “Would you like to hold her?”

An anxious chuckle left you, “Ooh, I haven’t held a baby in, centuries.”

The women shared a glance and Dis moved closer knowing how a short sixty years for her boys since being babies had been painful and how giddy she was learning she was expecting again after trying for so long. “Then you will be needing all the practice you can get before mine arrive.”

You grinned offering your arm for the large squirming baby to rest on, as soon as it did however it stilled staring up at you in awe, cooing as it folded its fingers against its chin. Gently with your ring bearing hand you stroked her cheek drawing a pleased squeal from her through a wiggle of her feet. In a glance up at Bella you asked, “Fourteen pounds?” She nodded watching the little hands wrapping around your fingers between amazed coos at how large it was compared to hers, “I do have to say Dwarf Pebbles are just adorable. All ears, wide eyed curiosity and a nice firm grip.” Bella chuckled as Bombur beamed at Thorin’s having to glance away keeping his dopey grin from your attention. You leaned in kissing her hand she held up to your mouth making her give a gleeful squeak, “Just ready to take on the world aren’t you? And you have such lovely sideburns.”

The boy on Thorin’s lap stroked his mustache and goatee saying, “I have more hair than her.”

You grinned at him, “Why yes you do, and such lovely hair it is too.” A blush coated his cheeks making the adults chuckle and his bashful thanks and lean against Thorin’s chest as your hand folded around the infant’s feet she pressed against it stirring a curious misting in your eyes for the innocent action.

In a move to sit on cushioned bench for a foot rest Dis peered up at you asking, “Are you alright?”

You nodded smiling at her trying to blink it away, “Ya, it’s the feet. My Gran was the same way.”

Dis chuckled knowingly, then asked, “Why was your last time holding an infant so long ago?”

You chuckled weakly, “Out in Orcarni I had Dwarf friends, but not the sort to trust me past work to be invited to family occasions. And the few I was invited to I was friends with the husbands, not the wives so I was left out of the cooing circles.”

“Whose infant was it? Old friend in Valinor?”

You shook your head and she shifted her gaze to Thorin who was subtly glaring at her to stop as you tickled the girl’s feet saying, “The last time was the day I lost my son.”

Their eyes went to you ready to cry as Thorin’s arm settled around your back with a gentle stroke through Dis stammering out, “I, we-,”

You shook your head giving her a grin, “I was just a teen, fell for a charming smile and all the right words. Got sick and found out I have a couple medicine allergies that made me lose him. No need to give me that look.”

Bella asked, “Your only one?”

You glanced at her, “I can have more, just haven’t been in a safe footing for a family, or found a partner to care to try again in my travels.” Another squeal came from the girl at your tap on her nose making her limbs wiggle again.

Dis’ hand settled on your knee, “I am sorry.” You nodded your head blindly, “Since we’re looking after you now would you mind writing those allergies down for us sometime? So we’ll all know them just in case?”

You nodded again, “Of course.” You answered trailing a finger around one of the girl’s ears making her giggle and squeal again.

..

The next two days blurred by as you lost a great deal of sleep in the set of reserved parties requesting your recipes on Frerin’s shift mingled with all those you would oversee on Thorin’s. However nearing the end of your third shift your eyes rose to Tauriel in her easing through the kitchen saying, “I have a table, they want to meet the chef.”

Thorin instinctually sighed as he still had ten minutes on his chicken breasts and asked, “Which chef?”

Tauriel turned her head to face you making you ask, “Me? Why me?”

She shrugged, “They didn’t even order any of your food.”

With a nod you wiped your hands on a rag feeling the indent from your returned ring that now hung on the chain around your neck beside Thorin’s marker under your chef’s coat. Though when you exited the kitchen and locked eyes with the trio of Elves waiting for you Tauriel pointed out you turned and went back inside the kitchen drawing Thorin’s eye making him chuckle as Dwalin said, “That was fast.”

Wetting your lips you drew the kitchen’s attention in your path to the break room where you fumbled a bottle of juice open after mumbling, “I can’t talk to them. I’ll kill him.”

A nod of Thorin’s head brought Fili to his skillet as he said, “Just don’t let it burn, keep pouring the sauce over it.” Earning a nod to his back as he went to check on you. Through the doorway he passed and eased into the chair beside yours facing you as you inhaled and exhaled deeply with your hands over your face, “Dearest?”

Lowering your hands you caught his eye saying lowly, “Dunne is here with his parents.”

Just then Tauriel entered the doorway saying, “The older couple says they won’t leave until they speak with her.”

Thorin drew in a breath then said, “Then they can pay and we will speak to them back here. They get five minutes, we have a kitchen to run.” Tauriel nodded and went to relay the message. Leaning in he kissed your cheek cupping your hands lowly rumbling in a soothing tone, “I am not leaving your side.” You nodded then glanced up a few moments later, seeing your former Dean walking through the kitchen and into the break room where a cocky grin eased onto his face extending a large sealed envelope to you.

“This is all we have to say to you. We won’t hinder your kitchen any more than we have to.” He sighed peering at you disapprovingly, “Not that it appeals to us to ever have to speak to you again.”

Your hand folded around the envelope and he released it, turning to pass through the doorway that Dwalin soon passed through as Thorin read the name of an Elven law firm noted on the front along with your name. The envelope alone had Dwalin drawing out his phone saying, “Don’t you open that! I’m getting Bilbo down here.” You nodded leaving the envelope on the table and took another sip of juice and went back to work with Thorin, focusing on that for the short time until Bilbo scurried through the back door towards the envelope in the break room. Three more orders were finalized and sent out to the final tables and removing your chef’s coat you locked eyes with Bilbo as he stood with a curious furrow of his brows in his walk into the kitchen drawing all eyes to him.

Bilbo we his lips then stated, “It seems they are suing you for custody.”

You scoffed and turned away with tears looming shrugging out of your coat as Dwalin and the boys moved closer as Thorin asked, “What?!”

Bilbo eyed your back then read from the page, “They are claiming you have maliciously kept a, Mr Dunne, I can’t read the rune for the last name, has been kept from the life of his child for an extended period far beyond reason. They are suing for full custody and financial compensation for mental and emotional distress you caused them.” He wet his lips, “Only, you never mentioned having a child.”

At your side Dis dabbed a handkerchief to dry your face as she and Diaa stroked your arms while Thorin neared Bilbo to state lowly through your disbelieving chuckle, “Bilbo, she had a miscarriage nine months in.”

Bilbo’s lips parted then closed as his brows furrowed in his flipping through the pages again, “Then, why..”

Thorin added in a growl, “Because three months after he got what he wanted she tracked him down and he shunned her when she told him she was pregnant and his father made her leave Hillcrest.”

Pure rage flooded through Bilbo’s eyes that locked with Thorin’s as he drew out his phone saying, “Oh they are not getting away with this!” His fingers typed across the screen mumbling to Thorin, “You go home my dear, I’ll handle this!” He finished dialing the number and raised the phone to his ear while Thorin went to wrap around your back, pleased you had just needed a moment for the shock of it all and embarrassment at it happening in front of the Durins.

Thorin lowly rumbled, “Don’t worry, Bilbo will chase them off.”

Dis nodded as Diaa stated, “No doubt they saw you on the show and online working here assuming they could get an easy payday hoping to hold a child as collateral.”

Bilbo entered the room again smirking as he made it to Dwalin’s side then smiled as his eyes locked with yours, “Just got off the phone with their lawyers. They are retracting their claim and if they did so much as breathe a word of this to the press I am going to annihilate them.”

You couldn’t help but grin and accept his hug that broke at his phone ringing bringing back his smirk in his haughty reply, “It appears they have contacted their clients.” He strolled to the break room again and Thorin wrapped around you again purring, “Dinner and a movie?”

You glanced up at him and nodded widening his grin as he led you out to his vehicle for the ride home. Behind you four cars followed you and you were settled on the couch between the boys while Thorin, Dwalin, Dis, Diaa and even Frerin after hearing from Bofur had driven over parking behind Bifur and Bofur who jumped into filling out the full meal. Each person packed in the kitchen as you were snuggled against Fili’s chest through the start of the film brought out your smile.

Your smile settled finally as you realized at the fifth stolen smiling glance from Thorin before he would nip at his lips when his relatives drew his attentions from you, he had no intention of ending your union. His affections and clear bond with you as well as his relatives doing the same told you all you needed to know, none of them wanted you to split up. Each hopeful gaze on them lined with a silent prayer that you would one day be bound by another contract sealing your place among their kin as so much more than Thorin’s Pearl.

Plates and platters coated with food were sprawled out on the array of tables carried into the living room to share the meal watching the film between laugh filled chatter until the topic of your dinner with your relatives the following night came up. Instantly you could sense at their timid questions they had hoped to meet them as well, causing you only to assume they hoped to one day mingle through holidays as well.

.

Pinned between the young brothers you were fast asleep as their bodies drooped in their own slip into a deep sleep. A nudge from Thorin parted Kili’s eyes to hear his uncle grumble, “Crash in my spare room.”

Kili nodded and eased off your back staggering his way to the guest room as Thorin scooped you up in his arms freeing Fili to do the same. The rest of the Durins filed into the other spare rooms, too tired to make it to their homes while Thorin carried you to his bed. Warmly he tucked you both into bed, curling around you with an anxious grin hoping your relatives would take to him as well as well as you were taken to by his. Eventually he did drift off, however in his hope to surprise you to breakfast in the morning to ease your own possible worries he awoke alone in bed with the scent of food wafting through his house.

Curiously he pulled on some jeans and a t shirt and walked barefoot to his kitchen where he found you with a high messy bun flipping the last of a stack of tortillas you had made from scratch. Over that the smell of cookies filled the room when Kili opened the oven at your reminder. The tray of mini cookies was eased onto a cooling rack as Fili added the marinated chicken breasts into the oven before Kili claimed your now freed skillet to pour the mixtures for an egg scramble into it as you moved the tortillas to the rest of the tray you covered on the spare stretch of counter by the mini brownies and cake balls you had sitting there.

With a curious grin Thorin joined Dis in the kitchen peering over her shoulder at the waffle mixture she started spooning into his waffle press as you brought out the mini sausages you diced along with some veggies for Kili’s next helping of the scramble. At your side Thorin eased his hands around your sides and accepted your kiss in a glance up at him then hummed, “Please tell me you haven’t been up all night.”

You grinned up at him, “Just a couple hours.” He raised a brow, “I should warn you, dinner for my family usually starts around lunch. We all fix the dinner, how it always was, all of us cooking makes it home, no matter where we are.”

His smile grew and he purred after kissing your cheek, “I’ll fix the bacon.”

You nodded then watched Fili’s return to grating the potatoes for the hash mix. The table was filled and again you shared the meal then cleaned up the dishes left in the running dishwasher as you moved back to the dishwasher to start mixing the chunks of chicken into a spicy sauce as Kili took the chicken from the oven he sliced up after confirming it was cooked thoroughly. That was set beside the slow cooker as the spicy chicken was added to the oven as Fili moved the bag of rice to the pot of water he set on the back burner. As he started to cook the rice you mixed a set of spices in a large measuring cup then started dicing more veggies and peeked over at Kili in his prepping the filling for spring rolls Dis helped him fill, roll up then fry to set aside with a grin of her own. Across from you Thorin sat at the counter grinning as he watched you after your insisting he relaxed.

A doorbell split through the house and Thorin grinned leaving Dis at the counter beside the boys after the rice had been added to a large bowl and mixed with the diced chicken after you mixed in the spices coating it fully then left it to cool. Behind Thorin you trotted and smiled as Ecthellion did and accepted his tight hug with a giggle. When he set you down your eyes turned to Glorfindel and atrunk in his arms as he flashed you a wink and leaned in to kiss your cheek, “Brought you some things.”

A curious smile eased onto your face eyeing it and the next one in a tall blonde teen’s arms who flashed you a smile on his way inside. Behind him you let out a giggle at his elder version of himself, Thranduil grinned widely as you giggled and stole a tight hug from him exclaiming happily, “Dew Drop!”

He chuckled and kissed your forehead, “I missed you Bunny!” He smiled down at you then nodded his head at the teen that just passed you, “My son Legolas.”

With a giddy squeak you asked him, “Little leaf?”

He nodded with a chuckle, “I gave you my word I’d choose your name choice.”

You giggled again then shifted your weight as Echo eased around you both to claim the wagon of supplies from the three young girls bringing out your wide smile increasing theirs in return. The golden haired purple eyed trio rushed over to you at Echo’s introduction of them as you erupted into giggles and guided them inside as the men greeted Thorin fondly as Echo patted Thranduil’s back saying, “Hope you don’t mind the company, Thran here couldn’t wait another month to see her again.”

Thorin shook his head locking eyes with the fellow chef saying, “I wasn’t aware you knew one another.”

Thranduil, “We were neighbors, her Gran used to show me a thing or two and Bunny couldn’t go a day with out roping me in to taste her new recipes.”

Thorin chuckled then followed you into the kitchen where you were showing your mini trio the spread while helping them tie back their hair and wash their hands as Echtellion and Glorfindel set aside the trunks and emptied the wagon onto the counters. Glorfindel started on prepping the ground hamburger, adding the spices you had set aside earlier. You guided the girls on slicing cucumbers, squash, carrots and peppers asking Echthellion, “What’s in the boxes?”

He smiled at your grin and answered after a peak at Thorin peering at them curiously, “They’re from Gran’s storage unit. Mainly the albums, films and the second one has the quilts from your Nanna and your Dad. Not mentioning the journals she recorded your experiments in.”

Glorfindel, “There’s more at ours you can go through later. Just wanted to bring that all over first.”

In a grin you told Thorin, “You can go through it.” Making him chuckle and find the one with the albums he moved to the center of his kin. Each album was set out on the dining room table with awws going through the room as each picture was admired and explained by Thranduil.

At the side of the table Legolas’ head turned and he grinned claiming the seat beside Gimli with an eager grin stating, “I know you.” Gimli snapped out of his groggy state to peer at the blonde curiously only to grin as he added, “I follow your page, love your pictures. You’re really talented.”

A soft blush coated on the now sheepish Dwarf teen’s cheeks as he replied, “Thank you.”

Legolas, “I mainly craft bows, arrows and small sculptures, Ada won’t let me forge knives just yet. My page is mainly reviews on other brands between photographs of mine.”

Gimli dug out his phone finding a page he followed and showed it to Legolas, “This one?”

Legolas nodded, “You follow me too?!”

As they delved into their shared interests Gloin’s attentions shifted to the pair monitoring them between glances at the albums. Thranduil chuckled shaking his head at a glance of his own then returned to the albums as Kili spotted the pictures of you dressed as a pirate with your twin brother making him chuckle and ask more about it.

Thranduil chuckled, “Oh she wanted to be a pirate when she was younger. Used to go round kidnapping people that came into her Gran’s place forcing them to try out her experimental flavors.”

Thorin stole a glance, grinning as he asked, “Who is that?”

Thranduil tapped his finger on the redhead in the picture, “That is Feanor.” The Durins peered up at him curiously, “He wasn’t that popular back then, just started out the Sil rankings, Elves just started to recognize it past the corrupt ring rankings. He used to come in at least a few times a week to speak to her Gran, distant cousins. And Jaqi used to just come out of nowhere and tackle him, dragging him to a chair and tying him up for her tastings. His little ones were grown by then and he just fell for her right away, never objected to her game. He’ll be thrilled to see her again I know it.”

Kili chuckled stating, “Well if she loves pirates still she could always try out the ship we have out back.”

At that your eyes moved to the Durins, asking, “The what?”

Fili chuckled, “The pirate ship playground out back of Gloin’s and yours.”

Glorfindel chuckled claiming your knife as you followed Fili to inspect it drawing an audible squeak from you before you returned to the group pointing at Thorin, “You never mentioned we had a pirate ship out back. We are having a very long conversation about this later.”

He chuckled and Echthelion said, “You go explore, we’ll be out in a bit.”

He kissed your cheek and chuckled watching you and the girls go out with the younger Durins and Thorin as Dis remained behind with a few of the other Durins remaining behind to help your relatives in the kitchen to learn more about them and you when you were younger. Outside you led the trio on a race over to the playground with a group of Bombur’s children after receiving the news of the family arriving to join in on the race to play with you. Along the edges on the benches while Gimli snapped pictures of you all Thorin sat grinning up at you madly in love at your gleeful exploration with your mirroring trio behind you. From bow to stern you explored then grabbed the end of the mock cannon and gasped exclaiming, “It’s a telescope!”

Chuckles sounded from the adults as you chased the girls to the slide and then over to the grass by the see saw, there they peered up at you asking if you would show them how to cart wheel, having seen pictures of you mid handstand for years. With a grin you showed them the basics and guided them through it before a herd of Durins joined you then led the race beck to the rope ladders to the ship again to head to the monkey bars you, Fili and Kili stood under to ensure no one fell along the way.

Stomachs were soon growling and you led them all back inside and all watched the home films Glorfindel put on as you helped to dish out the spread of food to all present as your younger life was laid bare.

Pt 9

[jpy693en-blog]

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[over-roaming-waves]

Gold

Hotel California Au

It was a blistering, windy day when he got to the hotel. Truthfully, if it wasn’t for the fact that his car had broken down, he would have never been there. But it did. So here he was.

Yugi opened the door to see the most eye-catching man that he had even seen in his life in front of him. Long, tri-colored hair that was well past his hips, dark brown skin that stretched over taunt muscles, decorated with white cloths that almost look see-though and gold artfully draped on him.

But his eyes… he didn’t know why, but those eyes gave him an off-kiltered feeling… they were as attractive as any other part of him, a mesmerizing sunset color... but he can’t feel like the other is leering at him, sizing him up for… something.

Fortunately, the man at the front desk was far less… distracting. He checked in without much fuss. Though Atem did lead him to his room.

And as Yugi laid in for the night he finally found a good way to describe the stranger’s eyes. They were like the lights that an angler fish puts out in the deep. A beautify burst of light that will spell your doom.

*****

It’s been several weeks and he’s car is still out of order. he called the next day to the local auto shop and they said that they have to have wait for the parts to be delivered.

At least he got to learn the name of the enchanting man he saw on his first day here. Atemu. The son of the guy who owns the hotel that he had been at ever since he came here. A beauty who seems to be with a different person every night.

Old, young, rich, poor, man, woman, black, white, copper, yellow, and everything in between. He never saw the other guests in the hotel either. Just the staff, the owner’s friends, and Atemu. The dangerous son who seeks him out between lovers. Yugi has kept his distance for the most part, becoming friendly with the bartender, Ryou. He works the day shift while his lover works nights. Ryou even sets up Monster World in a side room where they and a few other guests can play a game (Atem usually avoids Ryou if he can help it).

Of course, there was the occasional run-in, where they play a game (mostly card or dice but Atem has been known to take out the chess board when he wanted a win from their encounter). Rejected advances between truly pleasant conversations. He could even say that he finds that there were parts of Atem that he could see himself falling for, but there was too much that he didn’t want to with that it didn’t even really matter. It’s not like the wild man that he sometimes played with would change anything for him.

*****

He stares the scene in front of him. Blood coated the walls, body parts skewered hazardly in random corners, faces forever frozen in a look of horror. Not to mention the cause of such an event. The thing in the center.

He goes to the closest pot to throw-up lunch. (can he even be sure that any of that somehow got into the food he’s been eating?)

“Isn’t it enthralling?” He slowly turned to see the gleeful form of Atem, blood staining his white clothes red.

He moves away from the other, shaking from the event he just witnessed.

“Hm, well we just had to find a way to get rid of our more… persistent guests” he said as if he was talking about the weather.

He was still speechless as the seductive, terrifying form of Atem came closer. He backed away but it seems like one of the other ‘hosts’ found his misery amusing because he felt someone push him into the waiting arms of the man he was keeping away from.

He felt the other chuckle as he wrapped his arms around him. But for some reason, the moment when Atem’s arms brought him closer to the bloody chest, his arms loosened. The laughter stopped. Yugi took advantage of this moment of weakness and tore himself out of the other’s arms.

He dashed to the room(trap?) that he had been staying in and got his wallet and whatever else he can stuff into his pockets. The room twisted as he attempted to pack his suitcase. Screw it, they can keep it. He ran as fast as he could.

“Wait, don’t go!” someone shouts as he leaves the horrifying place. Later, he would think that it was Atem, but that couldn’t be. He never heard Atem say anything in such a vulnerable, desperate tone.

He shoots straight through the door, rushed pass the hallways which seemed less real by the second, and went out into the still shining sun. he ran out as far as he could. By the time that he found a person willing to take him to the nearest town, it was well into the night. He slept all the way through the ride.

As he was gathering his bearings, he faintly remembers the look in Atem’s eyes.

Like he was losing the most important person in the world.

****

He was back home.

To Domino.

He thought that things would click back into place once he was here but…

The streets look different, but he remembered that there was construction so that was to be expected (even though he thought that they were in different streets). The towers had different owners but businesses fold all the time (even though he was sure that some of those that are gone were almost everywhere when he left). And the cars were different, but new car models come out all the time (even though there were some that he remembered as recent when he left that looked old and beat-up).

He finally got to his street. His home. Kame Game shop. With a fresh coat of paint on it.

He parked his car on the street, locked the doors and headed in the front door. His first sight was a teen manning the cash register, something he remember doing though high school and well on into college. The teen had a bored look on their face… until they spotted him. Then all the blood drained from their face as they ran into the house, screaming for their grandma.

Grandma? Did grandpa get married while he was away.

He then saw an old woman charge though the door, her face a tapestry of a life well-lived, grey hair fashioned in a stylish way that made her look elegant and fierce, and here eyes a familiar blue. But what she said next chilled him to the bone.

“Yugi?”

Anzu. The old woman in front of him was Anzu. The old woman in front of him was Anzu and he looked the same as he did when he left for America.

The aged form of Anzu brought him into a sorrowful clasp that was in parts relief, dispirit, and afraid. As he took in this knowledge. He was pulled into the house while he was comprehending everything. He saw the aged forms of Jou and Honda as they came over, staring at him in fear and wonder.

They talked about things that had happened since he left, how his grandpa pass away not knowing his fate, how they were sure he was alive but after all was said and done for the day Yugi can help but feel alone.

Isolated.

Like that story of the fisherman and the turtle princess. Only he didn’t turn to dust. He wonders if the fisherman didn’t get the better deal.

He was declared legally dead. His friends are either aged with their own families that had grown up on stories about him or dead. There was a gap in experience and maturity and what they know it made him feel like an old relic that had snuck out of the museum.

He tries to adjust but… it was just too much.

He found himself wandering the streets at night. Starting at the stars. Faintly hoping that something makes it end. A mugging. A hit and run. A lightning strike. He knows that it is bad to think such thoughts, but it does not change the fact he does so. He always returns home with a bit of disappointment.

But one night, when he passed by the park, he sees a familiar face.

There, in a sleek red car, was Atem. His eyes still had danger but there was a sadness that they did not have when he last saw him. He still wore gold but he seems to trade in his white wardrobe for black, and it also seemed to say that the wearer was morning even with the skin-tight cloths. And he was looking straight at him.

They stared at each other for a few minutes, neither knowing what to say to the other before Yugi cleared his throat.

“Long way from home, aren’t you?”

“Yes.”

“Any reason you’re out here?” he shifted awkwardly between each foot.

“You.”

“…Why? You could have anyone you want. You did have anyone you wanted. You never seemed to care about who you’ve slept with before, so why start now? Heck, you can have anyone in this city so why are you here focusing on me?”

“…because they are not you.”

He glared at the other, not sure if he was being truthful but defiantly not trusting him to do something shady.

“…As you have observed, my kind are quite free with who we share our bodies with. We can be with numerous lovers and not feel a thing for them afterwards. But…”

“But?”

“Once we find the one who completes our soul, once we hold them in our arms, there is no one else. All the great beauties of the world do nothing for us, their fragrances turn to dung, their voices screeches. And there no other that we would want to be with. And for me there is you.”

“Why should I believe you? You and your crazy hotel trapped me there for fifty year! Fifty year as my loved ones grew up, dated, fell in love, got married, had kids and grandkids, traveled, learned, DIED and I was in some kind of static zone to be used around like some kind of plaything! So why should I believe a damn word that comes out of your mouth?”

“What reason would I have to lie?”

He thought up several reasons… before he really thought of it. If he indeed was telling the truth, that would explain why he kept away from Ryou (he was claimed by another), why Atem looked so desperate when he ran (he found his soul mate who wanted nothing to do with him), and even why the hotel was there to begin with (what other place has people coming and going without rousing much suspicion).

“…None.”

There was another period of silence.

“Is there anything here for you?”

“…No.”

He got in and never looked back.

[ravenhilarious]

Rowan & Jae – My Dear Study Partner

(Faceclaims: Pooja Hegde and Park Ji Bin)

Fandom: Harry Potter – Hogwarts Mystery Genre: Mostly romance, with a dash of friendship Pairings: Rowan Khanna/Jae Kim (and a few other ones, but that’s a spoiler ;-D )  Summary: It takes place during their fifth year – before, during, and after the Celestial Ball. Rowan starts helping Jae with his homework, causing the two main characters to slowly fall in love. I’ve warped canon a little, but it mostly follows the canon storyline. Words: 13 879  Warnings: Mild aphobia/allonormativity; gender dysphoria/mild internalized transphobia; mild bullying; ask me to add if necessary 

enjoy my little drawing here. The story is under the cut.

It was quiet in the library. All the students were deeply concentrating on their homeworks. But everyone looked up when a small, dark-haired boy in a yellow sweatshirt casually walked in and started looking at the bookshelves. Jae Kim was well known for being a rule breaker and despising academics. So what was he doing here? “Hey, Rowan?” he suddenly blurted out. The lanky, brown-skinned girl with glasses peeped at Jae through piles of books and parchment. “Yes?” she said. “Don’t you ever get bored here?” “No, why would I? It’s full of books. What more could you wish for?” “It doesn’t get… lonely?” he asked worriedly. Rowan shrugged. “Not really,” she replied. “There are plenty of bookworms I can talk to if I want.” “I bet you like the Ravenclaw common room, then,” Jae said. “It’s probably filled with nerds like you.” “Not all nerds are academically interested,” Rowan sighed. “Lots of them are more more into music or theatre, and those people will never shut up! Not to mention, we got Tulip Karasu…” “Oh yeah,” Jae grinned. “She’s quite the distraction, isn’t she?” “Yup.” Tulip Karasu was an extremely eccentric prankster, whose talent was only surpassed by the Hufflepuff student Tonks and the school poltergeist, Peeves. “Bet you’d hate the Gryffindor common room then. We got plenty of Karasus.” “I get uncomfortable just thinking about it,” Rowan chuckled. “By the way, what are you doing here in the library? I thought you wouldn’t touch a book unless imperiused?” “You thought right,” Jae replied. “The only book that can catch my attention is a comic book.” “I’m afraid they don’t have comic books here,” Rowan said. Jae shrugged and continued his search through the bookshelves. After watching him for a while, Rowan asked: “What are you doing here?” Jae felt like himself shrinking a little before explaining: “The thing is, I have to write an essay in transfiguration class. I’m alright at the transfiguration part. But essays… I have never been very good at that.” “Why not?” Rowan asked. “It’s just… every time I sit down and look at the parchment, my mind starts going all over the place,” he explained. “I start thinking about Quidditch, food, comics, trading… pretty much everything but that essay. And when I finally force myself to focus, some loud noise distracts me.” “Perhaps you need some help,” Rowan said thoughtfully. “Have you ever tried studying with anyone?” There was a long pause before Jae truthfully shook his head. “Then why don’t you come and sit down? I know just the book that might help you!” Jae walked towards the table and sat down beside Rowan, who placed a giant book in front of him. “What are you writing your essay on?” she asked. “Uh, transfiguration of Muggle gadgets.” Rowan pointed her wand at the book, causing it to turn to another page. “There,” she said. “Here’s some information about the dangers of trying to add transfiguration to electronic objects. Read this page, then we can talk about it.” Jae started reading, but his eyes kept flying away. “Jae, focus!” Rowan said sternly. He tried again, but no improvement. Eventually, Rowan cast Engorgio on the page, so the letters became much bigger. That helped. After finishing reading the page, Jae looked up at Rowan. “You’re done? Then let’s start making a good intro.” She explained how she usually wrote her intros. Jae tried very hard to ignore all the distractions in the room and in his brain. Eventually, he had written a small paragraph which, granted, wasn’t very neatly looking, but he was quite proud of the result, and so was Rowan. Before they knew it, more than an hour had passed, and they only noticed when Madam Pince threw them out and demanded them to go to bed. “Well,” Jae said. “Goodnight, Rowan. And thank you for helping me.” “It was a pleasure,” she replied. “I hope you sleep well tonight.” With those words, they went to each of their towers and into their respective dormitories.

The next day in the early afternoon, Jae came to the library again. Rowan was sitting at the very same table as yesterday, today with short hair and male trousers instead of the long hair and knee-length skirt. As soon as he saw Jae, Rowan moved some of his books to make room for him. “Do you want me to help you with your essay again?” he asked. Jae nodded and found his quill and parchment from his pocket. “How much have you written?” Rowan asked. “A roll and a half,” Jae said. “But my letters are pretty big, so it’s probably closer to like, barely a roll.” “I don’t think Professor McGonagall cares a lot about that,” Rowan assured him. “Come, let me look at that essay.” Jae handed Rowan the parchment. “You’ve written a lot since yesterday,” Rowan exclaimed. “What do you think of it?” Jae asked nervously. “Hm,” Rowan said. “Not bad. There are a few grammar and spelling issues, but what you’ve written is very good. Let’s see… perhaps we should look at the history of transfiguration of Muggle gadgets. We can use the same book as yesterday.” He found the book and turned it to another page, then asked Jae: “Do you easily get distracted by things? Like, other students talking, flies buzzing around, ticking clocks?” “A little,” he replied. Rowan pointed his wand at Jae’s head, causing the room to get blurrier, both visually and in sound. “Wow,” Jae whispered. “It’s the focusing charm,” Rowan explained. “It was invented by a witch whose Muggle husband had a mental disability called ADHD, which meant he couldn’t focus very well and easily got distracted. This spell helped him a lot.” “I probably have ADHD, then,” Jae muttered. “That would explain why you have trouble sitting still on a chair, and why your mind is always so full.” Jae’s face lit up. “You know what, it does!” he smiled. “You must teach me that spell someday!” “I will,” Rowan said. “But now, you have to write your essay.” “Yes, of course.” After an hour of hard work, Jae felt that his essay was finished. Rowan was also satisfied with the result. “I hope Old McGonny will like it,” Jae said. “I’m sure she will,” Rowan replied and lifted the focusing charm again, so the random noises and movements around the library became clear again. “I don’t know how to thank you enough, Rowan,” Jae smiled. “And I’ll have to go to detention now. See ya later!” Then he stormed out faster than a Comet 260. Rowan couldn’t help smiling before going back to his own textbook.

The Gryffindors and Ravenclaws had Charms class together the next day. Rowan, who today identified as a girl again and as such wore long hair and a skirt, was practicing Scourgify on a dirty cauldron while chatting with her best friend, Beam Bugge, who was sitting right next to her. “Can you guess who Billingsley tried to ask out?” Rowan asked. “No?” Beam replied excitingly. “Merula Snyde.” Merula was a Slytherin girl from their year who didn’t like Rowan and most of the friend group, to say the least. Beam burst out laughing: “How do you know?” “During flying class, when you and Andre were practicing loops, and I was polishing my broom with and Merula, he came over and asked her. Let’s just say, Merula was not happy.” They both laughed, but got interrupted by Professor Flitwick, who came to their table and said: “I’m glad you’re having so much fun casting Scourgify, but I’m afraid I’ll have to stop your little party.” They both shut up immediately, and Flitwick continued: “Beam Bugge, a young Gryffindor student has trouble with Wingardium Leviosa. Would you like to help him?” Beam sighed, but walked over to the struggling blond boy whose name they couldn’t remember. Jae, who had previously sitten behind the two Ravenclaws, jumped to Beam’s empty seat while Flitwick wasn’t looking. “Poor Billingsley,” he smirked at her. Rowan giggled. “Can’t really understand why anyone’d date that Snyde girl, though. I mean, she’s pretty and all, but really?” “True,” Rowan replied. “Thanks for helping me out, by the way,” Jae said. “With that essay, I mean.” “It was a pleasure to study with you,” Rowan said. “Yeah, I was actually able to concentrate, for once. And not just because of that charm of yours,” Jae added. “Perhaps you learn better when you have someone to help you?” Rowan suggested. “Have you ever studied with another student before?” “Not really,” he admitted. “When I started at Hogwarts back in ‘84, I didn’t have my parents to help me with anything anymore. And that was kinda… strange. And I felt so embarrassed when asking teachers and fellow students for help to… pretty much anything. So I started going in the opposite direction, by doing everything by myself. And then some older student sold me an auto-answer-quill, and then I just continued to use those when I had trouble with any schoolwork. So studying with other students just never really occurred to me, to be honest.” There was a long pause, which Rowan interrupted: “If studying with me will make you stop doing illegal stuff, then I’ll gladly do it again.” “Well, I don’t think my trading partners would appreciate me cutting them off…” he began, but upon seeing Rowan’s disappointed face, he added: “But I’d love to study with you again.”

“Soooooo…” said a curious voice into Rowan’s ear. She looked up from her book into Tulip’s grinning face. “So what?” Rowan asked irritatedly. She was lying on her bed, with closed curtains, hoping to get some alone time before going to bed. But she had forgotten to lock the curtains, so now everyone could open them. Tulip continued approaching Rowan with that voice: “I couldn’t help noticing what happened in charms class…” “What happened?” Rowan asked flatly; she was almost sure what Tulip was referring to. And she was right: “You and Jae.” “Oh, that,” Rowan mumbled, trying to sound surprised. Beam’s pale face appeared above Tulip’s copper red hair: “What was that all about?” Rowan sighed and told them: “I helped him study yesterday, and the day before that. And he came over to thank me. That’s all.” “Is that all he did?” Tulip asked. “Yes?” Rowan replied slowly. Tulip’s black eyes glittered, and Beam smiled crookedly. “And he also wanted me to help him study again in the future,” she admitted. Beam’s dark blue eyes widened under the pink glasses: “And what did you say?” “Yes, of course.” Upon realising how this may have sounded to the others, Rowan added: “I mean, I love studying, and if I can help other students, that must mean that I’m a good Professor. Right?” “Right,” she heard three other voices saying. Apparently, Badeea Ali, the last dormmate, had been listening to their conversation. “What are you all ‘right’ing me for?” she asked, more irritatedly and less confusedly that she had hoped. “Nothing, nothing…” she heard Tulip say, before all the others left Rowan’s bed in order to go to sleep themselves. Perhaps Tulip and the others were right. Perhaps Jae had wanted something more from Rowan than “just” studying with her. And Rowan was not sure how to feel about that.

“Great news, Rowan!” Jae jumped onto the chair next to Rowan before she even noticed him coming into the library. “I just got my transfiguration essay back!” Rowan’s face lit up: “Oh, tell me about it!” “Old McGonny… she liked it. She told me that… that it was the best essay that I had ever written, and that she could tell I hadn’t cheated.” “Jae, that’s amazing!” “Yeah. I don’t even know how to react.” Jae wanted to scream, but was able to stop himself. Madam Pince wouldn’t be too happy about it, after all. But getting Professor McGonagall’s approval, then Rowan’s… that was a great feeling. “Normally, I don’t really care about my grades,” he thought out loud. “And it sucks a little that she knows when I cheat… but the feeling of getting told that something I made, something I worked hard on, was actually good… I’ve never heard that before. I felt… proud. And I have a feeling that she’s kinda proud of me, too?” Rowan smiled at him: “Oh, I’m so happy for you, Jae! I’m really happy that I could make you feel better. If you ever need my help again…” “I do, actually,” Jae said. “I have to write an essay in potions class as well.” “I have a feeling that Professor Snape doesn’t like you very much,” Rowan said. “Yeah, but I don’t take it personally,” Jae shrugged. “You should see how much he hates Tonks, and Charlie Weasley. But yeah, he does consider me a troublemaker.” “I bet you consider that a compliment,” Rowan smirked. Jae laughed: “Yep. But I do want to pass potions class, so perhaps you could help me…” “Why don’t you ask Penny Haywood instead?” she asked. “You have class together, and she’s a natural at potions.” “I think you’re a better teacher, though.” After the words had left his mouth, Jae immediately regretted saying them. But there was nothing to do, and Rowan had heard him. Her facial expression and her voice changed a little: “You… you think?” “Yes,” Jae said bluntly. Her little smile made him continue: “Penny might be good at potions, alright, but not at explaining what she does. She just does it. You on the other hand… you tutor me like I’m a first year student. You help me focus, whereas Penny talks about everything else. She is very sweet and brilliant, but your way of teaching is just what I need.” They both blushed a little, but it was more obvious on Jae’s pale face. Rowan was the first to break the awkward silence: “Er… thank you, Jae. That’s very… a very nice thing to say. I’m so glad that someone thinks I’m good at what I enjoy doing and hope to do in the future.” “I enjoy spending time with you in general.” Why did Jae always have to say out loud what was on his mind? Could it be the ADHD thing? “Merry christmas, Jae,” Rowan said. Jae gave her a confused look, to which Rowan replied: “Sorry, I’m just not used to receiving compliments like that.” Then she admitted: “I enjoy spending time with you, too. Too bad you’re always in detention, eh?” “Too bad you’re always in the library, eh?” They both laughed. Jae grabbed Rowan’s hand. Rowan was surprised, but didn’t pull back. They both sat there for a few seconds, before they awkwardly let go and started packing their things. “Your hands are a lot bigger than I thought,” Jae mumbled, trying to break the awkward silence, but regretted it quickly. Wasn’t that a pretty rude thing to say to a girl? “Your hands are a lot smaller than I thought,” Rowan said. Jae started laughing, then Rowan joined in. “See you tomorrow,” Jae said and stormed out, before his face became as red as his worn trainers. Rowan waved at him and had to force herself to look away.

“And then I was like, I can just dance with a dragon!” The other Gryffindor boys laughed at Charlie Weasley’s joke, while Jae came into the dorm. “Hi, there, Jae,” Ben Copper said. “Have you been trading illegal stuff again?” Charlie grinned. “Not this time,” Jae replied. “Then what?” Ben asked. “I’ve been studying.” Ben and Charlie glared at him. “In the library. With Rowan Khanna.” “You’re kidding, right?” Charlie exclaimed. “Perhaps not,” said Ben slowly. “I saw you two chatting in charms class last week.” “Exactly!” Jae said. Charlie looked at Jae in confusion: “It’s not like you to care about studying, Jae.” “Nope.” “What’s happened to you?” “I kinda want to pass my OWLs.” Charlie lifted an eyebrow. His brown eyes kept staring sceptically into Jae’s black. “That, and… I like studying with Rowan. She’s a really good tutor.” Everyone was quiet for awhile, until an unexpected voice asked: “Do you fancy her?” “No!” Jae shouted in surprise. It was the blond Leviosa boy, who rarely spoke to them, so his question was quite unexpected. After thinking about it for awhile, Jae admitted: “Or yes. Perhaps. I dunno.” “Perhaps you need to find out soon,” Charlie said. “The Celestial Ball is coming up pretty soon, and as far as I know, Rowan doesn’t have a partner yet.” “I thought she’d go with you, Ben?” Ben was Rowan’s best male friend, so Jae had assumed that they’d go together, at least as friends. “I’ve considered asking her,” Ben began, “but we’ve talked about it, and… we decided we’re too good friends for that. It would be weird. So… feel free to ask her, bro.” Jae felt his heart rising. “Do you think she could… you know… be interested in me?” The question was mostly directed at Ben, who was also the one to reply: “I can ask her for you if you want?” Jae’s heart was now sitting in his throat. “You’d do that? Thank you thank you thank you, Ben. Thank you, so much.”

Meanwhile, Rowan had told her own dormmates about the episode in the library. “I never imagined he’d be so nice,” she said excitedly. Tulip raised her dark eyebrows: “Is he – ‘nice nice’?” “Yeah,” Rowan answered. “Nice nice.” “You’re blushing, Rowan,” Badeea pointed out. “I know,” Rowan sighed. “But… he could never be interested in a quiet nerd like me. And how does he feel about me being gender fluid? And my terrible puberty voice! I’m also like, a head taller than him. And really ugly…” “Aw, don’t say that, Rowan,” Beam said comfortingly. “Real beauty is on the inside,” Badeea said. “Yeah, nerds are sexy,” Tulip grinned. “Seduce him with your intelligence. And also, tall girls? Me likey! Besides, long legs are trending right now. Be your smart, intimidating self. Then he’ll swoon at your feet. Perhaps literally.” “That’s…” said Rowan hesitantly. She wasn't sure how to respond. But perhaps Tulip might be onto something: “Oddly good advise. Thank you, Tulip.” “Any time,” Tulip smiled. “Hey, Rowan?” Beam suddenly said. “I have detention with Jae tomorrow. If we can keep the nosy house elves out of the way, then perhaps I could…” “Ask him what he thinks of me?” Rowan asked hopefully, her heart skipping several beats. Perhaps there was a chance that Jae had feelings for her. A little chance, perhaps.

It was Saturday. There were no classes, but Jae still had detention with the house elves after breakfast. He took a last gulp of orange juice and said quietly to Ben, who was sitting to his right: “I’m off to detention now. Could you go to the library and talk to Rowan?” “Sure,” Ben replied. “Thanks, Ben,” Jae said. “I’m gonna owe you one.”

Meanwhile, at the Ravenclaw table, Rowan and Beam had just finished eating their breakfast, and the plates, glasses and cutlery disappeared from the table. “Okay,” Beam said. “I’m heading to the kitchen.” “Thank you, Beam,” Rowan said. “I think I’ll go to the library.” “Hi, Rowan,” said a voice behind them. It was Ben. “Are you going to the library?” “What do you think?” Rowan smirked at him. “Awesome!” he said. “I got something to ask you about.” “I’ll be glad to help you,” Rowan replied. Beam went to the Gryffindor table, where Jae had just gotten up from his chair. “Hey there, BB,” he greeted them. “You ready for detention?” Beam grinned: “I’m so excited to scrub mustard and smelly cheese off the plates.” Jae laughed: “So am I.”

Rowan and Jae had just arrived at the library, and Rowan started unpacking her bag. Ben placed himself opposite her. “So,” Rowan said. “What subject do you want to ask me about?” “Jae Kim,” Ben replied. Rowan had not expected that answer and asked: “What do you mean?” Ben hesitated a little, but then started explaining: “I’ve noticed that you two, umm… have been spending a lot of time together lately.” “It’s not what you think,” Rowan blurted out a little too fastly. “Really?” “Yeah. I’ve just helped him study. That’s all.” She could feel her head getting warmer and hoped that Ben didn’t notice her blushing. “It seems like it’s helping,” Ben said. “He’s become much more dedicated to school work now.” Rowan tried to act surprised: “That’s amazing!” Ben continued: “All because of you.” “Yeah…” she said slowly. “He’s told me how amazing of a tutor you are,” Ben said. “How he learns so much better with you.” “Well,” Rowan said, trying to hide her enthusiasm, “I’m glad I can help him…” “Don’t you feel… proud?” Ben asked. “Yeah,” Rowan responded, “a little.” “You like studying with him?” “I umm…” She wasn’t sure what to say. “I enjoy tutoring other students, so I can practise becoming a professor.” “What do you think of him?” The question had slapped Rowan in the face, even though she had half expected it. “Are you interrogating me?” she asked suspiciously. “I might be,” he smiled. “Why?” she asked, a bit irritatedly now. “You of all people should know how creepy this is.” Rowan knew that Ben was diagnosed with anxiety and omniphobia by Muggle doctors (he was Muggle-born). His smile broadened: “I do.” Ben’s uncharacteristic calmness frustrated Rowan to no end. “Then why do you do it?” “Because I think you might have feelings for him.” How on earth did Ben know about that? And why was he so interested? “No,” Rowan said firmly. “No, I don’t.” That wasn’t true, of course, but Ben did not need to know that. “Are you sure?” he asked. “No!” she repeated. Upon realizing what she said, she corrected herself: “I mean, yes. Yes, I am sure. I have no romantic feelings for Jae.” Her head felt like an oven now. Her cheeks had the same colour as Ben’s Gryffindor tie. Eventually, her head exploded: “Okay, fine. I guess he’s cute. Are you happy now?” Ben’s smile was brighter than unicorn blood. “Yep,” he said. Rowan immediately regretted admitting her feelings. But she couldn’t take it back now. “Please, don’t tell anyone,” she begged with a small voice. “Okay?” “Don’t worry,” Ben promised. “I won’t.” But Rowan was not entirely convinced.

Meanwhile, the kitchen was busy. All the house elves were working on each of their individual tasks, while Jae was scrubbing plates and pans, and Beam was drying them with a dishtowel. Beam made sure that no one could hear them, before quietly saying: “Hey, Jae?” “Hmm?” Jae said. “Can I ask you something?” they asked. “You just did,” he replied. “But you may ask me one more question if you want.” “I’ve noticed that you have been studying with Rowan a lot lately.” “Yeah,” he said and handed Beam a clean, wet plate, which they began drying. “I decided that I did want to pass my OWLs, after all.” “Great decision,” Beam said and put the newly dried plate on the shelf where it belonged. “Yeah,” he mumbled, relieved that they didn’t go in that direction. “How does it feel to study with her?” Beam continued. “Is she a good tutor?” “She’s amazing,” Jae replied, hoping he didn’t blush as much as he felt he did. “I learn so much better with her than I do alone, or in class.” “She’s very nice, isn’t she?” Beam said. Jae nodded and tried to focus on the dirty frying pan. “And smart?” “She’s a genius!” Jae blurted out, hoping he didn’t sound too obsessed. “What do you, umm, think of her?” Beam asked carefully. “I do like her,” he answered, now realizing that Beam might be going in that direction, after all. “Like, or like-like?” “Why are you so interested in that?” he asked. Then he realized what this could be about, and what he had to do: “Is it because you fancy her? Cause if you do, I’ll back off, I promise. She’s your best friend, after all.” “No, no, no, no, I don’t!” Beam said quickly. “We’re just friends. Besides, I’m pretty sure she’s only into guys.” Jae’s heart jumped out of the box it was about to get trapped in and did a little dance. “But do you fancy her?” Beam asked. “If we say I do, hypothetically,” he said and gave Beam the (finally!) cleaned frying pan, “would you then tell her?” “Would you want me to?” Beam asked and started drying the pan. “No!” Jae exclaimed. “Then I won’t tell her, if you fancy her, hypothetically.” Jae sighed: “Then I guess that I do.” His cheeks were the same shade of pink as the raspberry pudding he was currently scrubbing off a bowl. “Are you planning to tell her?” Beam asked and put the now dry frying pan into the pan drawer. Jae shrugged. “Dunno,” he mumbled. “Do you think there’s a chance she’ll like me back?” “You could ask her for the Celestial Ball as a date,” Beam suggested, “and if it gets awkward, you could say you meant it as a friend?” “That’s…” Jae weighed the plan in his head. It couldn’t go terribly wrong, could it? “That’s an amazing idea. Thanks, Beam!” He was now done cleaning the last fork and hoped Pitts would let them go now. He was urging to come outside, ask Ben whether he had found out anything about Rowan. And he especially wanted to find Rowan…

“So,” Rowan said excitedly and dumped herself onto the seat next to Beam, who was eating a tofu and squash sandwich. Rowan grabbed a chicken and chili sandwich, cast a Muffliato charm non-verbally and continued: “Have you found out anything?” “Yes,” Beam replied. “He likes you.” “Like-like?” Rowan asked, her entire body shaking, inside and out. “Yep,” Beam smiled. Rowan wanted to scream, but remembered that even a Muffliato charm couldn’t hide such a loud noise. Instead, she grabbed Beam and hugged them, tightly: “I can’t believe it,” she whispered with a shaking voice. “Oh, my gosh. This is impossible. I can’t even…” The rest of her words turned into unintelligible gibberish. Could it really be true that Jae – cool, funny Jae – like liked Rowan, a plain and nerdy girl?

Meanwhile, at the Gryffindor table, Ben, too, had cast a Muffliato charm around him and Jae. Jae had a piece of pizza on his plate, but didn’t eat anything. Instead he turned to Ben, who was enjoying a ham and mayo sandwich, and asked: “Did you talk to her?” “Mmmm,” Ben said, with his mouth full of sandwich. “Did you ask her about me?” “Mmmm,” Ben repeated. “What did she say?” Jae asked excitedly. Ben swallowed and said: “Do you want me to tell you the truth?” “Yes!” Jae replied. “Alright,” Ben said and prepared himself for whatever Jae’s reaction would be. “She told me that she thinks you’re… cute.” “Cute?” Jae asked confusedly. “Does she mean cute as in a puppy crup, or cute as in… boyfriend material?” “I’m not sure,” Ben said jokingly. “Do you usually blush around puppy crups?” “She was blushing?” Jae exclaimed, a little louder that he had intended. The Muffliato charm was strong, though, so it didn’t seem like anyone had heard him. “Yeah,” Ben smiled. “I think she has a big crush on you.” Jae tried to comprehend what Ben had just said. Rowan found him cute. She had blushed while talking about him. Could it really be? “Do you think,” he began, “that I should try to ask her to the Celestial Ball?” “That’s up to you,” Ben said. “I wouldn’t do it, but then again, I’m a big coward. I think you should go for it.” “Yeah, Beam said so too,” he said slowly. “You’ve told Beam that you like Rowan?” Ben asked. “Yeah?” Jae replied. “I mean, they asked me, and I said yes, so… “ “They’re Rowan’s best friend!” Ben warned him. “They’re gonna tell her immediately.” “They promised they wouldn’t.” “Just like I promised Rowan I wouldn’t tell you about her feelings.” Ben shook his head. “Oh, Jae, I’m sorry. I should never have gotten involved in all this…” “It’s not your fault, Ben!” Jae said sternly. “I’m glad you did this for me. I’m really, really grateful. But I better ask her pretty soon…”

Jae tiptoed and looked toward the Ravenclaw table after a tall, skinny figure with long black hair. But he only found a sixth-year boy who once bought a fanged frisbee from him. No Rowan. Not even Beam’s blue-and-purple-striped locks. But he did see Badeea’s blue, star-patterned hijab, and ran toward her. “Hey, Badeea,” he said. “Have you seen Rowan Khanna?” “I think she and Beam went to the common room,” she responded. “I’m heading there as well. Do you want to come with me?” “Yes, please.” The two of them went up the many staircases and arrived at a large wooden door with a bronze-coloured knocker taking the shape of an eagle on it. “What’s the password?” Jae asked. “It’s not a password,” Badeea explained. “It’s a riddle.” “What happens if you can’t answer the riddle?” “I don’t know,” Badeea said thoughtfully. “I’ve never been unable to do so myself. But now let’s find out what our riddle will be.” She grabbed the knocker and knocked on the door. The bronze eagle opened its beak: “Greetings, young students. I suppose you want to enter?” “Yeah,” Badeea replied. “Hm, alright,” the eagle said. “What disappears when you say its name out loud?” “I do,” Jae grinned. “Cause then I know I’m in trouble.” Badeea tried to hold back a laugh. The eagle hesitated for a while, then said: “You’re not wrong, young man. While not the answer I was looking for, it was still a correct one. You may come in.” Jae and Badeea looked surprisedly at each other. “I was gonna say ‘silence’,” Badeea said. “But I like your answer better.” “Wow,” Jae whispered when the door opened. “Your common room is really beautiful.” “I know, right?” Badeea said excitedly. “Now, you wanted to find Rowan… I can’t really see her. Perhaps she’s in the dormitory. Want me to check for you?” “Yeah, please,” Jae said. Badeea disappeared through the door next to white statue, which Jae assumed was supposed to be Rowena Ravenclaw.

Rowan was deeply rooted in her book, when a light voice suddenly called: “Hi, Rowan.” Rowan looked up and into Badeea’s dark eyes. Badeea smiled: “I think there’s someone who wants to talk to you.” “Who?” Rowan asked. She didn’t want to leave her book, unless it was a Professor, or a family member, or Bill Weasley, or… “Jae Kim.” Rowan’s heart made a flick-flack upon hearing the name. She put a bookmark into the book, ran a hand through her hair, put a finger on the metal between her glasses and jumped up from her bed and down the staircase.

Jae was sitting on a blue couch and watching Tulip and some third years experiencing with several potions and banned objects in a corner (none of the prefects seemed to care), while Rowan came crashing through the door. He immediately got up from the couch, and their eyes met. They both smiled at each other. “Hi, Jae,” Rowan said awkwardly. “You wanted to see me?” “Yeah,” Jae said. “Uh, I actually wanted to ask you something. Come and sit down.” They both dumped themselves into the couch that Jae had just gotten up from. “Okay,” Jae breathed. “I know it might seem a little weird of me to come into the Ravenclaw common room like that. But I had to ask you before it’s too late.” “Jae,” Rowan said worriedly. “I’ve never seen you that serious. Is everything fine?” “Everything’s fine, yeah,” Jae replied. “I just wanted to know, uh…” He tried to force the question out, but it was stuck in his throat. “I wanted to ask you if you wanted to go with me to the Celestial Ball.” This time, Rowan couldn’t stop herself: “YEEEEEEEEESSSSSS!” she screamed. She felt tears coming to her eyes, wetting her glasses, and her cheeks burning like an active volcano, and her heart having its own life somewhere in her chest. But she didn’t care. Jae Kim, the amazing, hilarious, adorable Jae Kim, had just asked her out. She didn’t know what to do with her arms and eventually flung them around Jae and hugged him tightly, not caring that most of the other students in the common room stared at them. Jae hugged her back, overjoyed and still in disbelief about her answer. It was like being in a romance novel, where the main characters finally got each other after 20 boring chapters of mutual pining, drama, misunderstandings, arguing… except they had skipped over all those chapters. Eventually, they let go of each other, and Jae asked quietly: “So um, this is a date? Not just a ‘we’re going as friends’ date, but an actual date?” “If you want it to be,” Rowan squeaked. “I do,” Jae smiled. “More than anything.” There was an awkward pause, where they both started realizing how many people stared at them. “Well, um,” Jae stuttered. “I guess that… that I have to… to go back to the Gryffindor common room. Er, see you later, Rowan!” “Yeah,” Rowan said. “See you later, Jae.”

Rowan walked dazedly up the stairs again. She barely noticed Badeea smiling proudly at her. She dumped herself onto her bed and stared at the ceiling. Was it really true? Had Jae just asked her to the Celestial Ball, as a real date? Meanwhile, Jae went toward the Gryffindor common room, still in awe that Rowan had said yes. Who would’ve guessed that asking out your crush could be scarier than refusing to trade with a group of ex-Death Eaters twice your size in Knockturn Alley? And who would’ve guessed that getting a “yes” felt like a bigger success than Gryffindor winning the House Cup?

After a while, Beam came into the dorm and noticed Rowan lying on her bed, completely still. “Rowan?” they said quietly. Rowan sat up and sent Beam a broad smile: “Hi there, Beam.” “Are you okay?” Beam asked. “Yeah,” Rowan responded. “I’m okay… more than okay…” “I’ve just talked to Andre. We’ve talked about meeting up in the transfiguration classroom tomorrow after lunch. Are you okay with that?” Andre Egwu was a Ravenclaw boy in their year. He had promised to find Rowan, Beam and Ben some outfits for the Celestial Ball. Tomorrow, after lunch? “That’s fine,” Rowan said. And then she couldn’t keep it in any longer: “I’m going with Jae for the Ball.” Beam gasped, then jumped onto Rowan’s bed and hugged her. They both screamed. “Congratulations!” Beam exclaimed when they were done screaming. “Did you ask him, or did he ask you?” “He did. He came into the common room. And then… then he asked me…” “Oh, Rowan!” Beam laughed. “I’m so happy for you.” “Me too. I hope Andre can make me look pretty…”

“Password?” Jae had just arrived at the door to the Gryffindor common room, where the portrait of The Fat Lady was guarding. “Starfire,” he said. The portrait door swang open, and he went in. A large group of students were sitting in a corner and chatting loudly, not all of them being Gryffindors. Jae joined them, throwing himself onto the laps of Bill Weasley and another seventh-year Gryffindor boy he didn’t remember the name of. “Guess who’s got a date for the Ball now?” he shouted proudly. “Have you asked her?” it came from Charlie, who was sitting on the coffee table, eating biscuits. “Asked who?” asked five or six voices at the same time. “Rowan Khanna,” Jae smiled. “Can you believe it? She said yes!” There were several “woohoo!”s and “yes!”s around Jae, and Bill patted him on the head (causing Jae to blush a little, hoping no one noticed). Charlie threw Jae a biscuit. “Rowan Khanna?” sounded a mocking voice behind them. It was Emily Tyler, a seventh year Gryffindor girl. She was smart, rich, popular and probably very pretty beneath the thick layers of makeup, but she could be really arrogant. “Yeah,” Jae sneered at Emily. “Got a problem with that?” “Not really,” she said. “I just never thought any of you would be able to get a date. But it makes sense that you’d take each other, I guess… you’re both kinda ugly. You deserve each other.” With those words, Emily turned around, flicked her brown ponytail and went into the girl’s dormitory. “Rowan is not ugly!” Jae yelled after her. “Just ignore her,” the seventh-year whose lap Jae was resting his head on said. “She’s just mad that she lost the decorating competition to Penny Haywood.” “Yeah,” Bill agreed. “She’s been harassing me and Charlie about our, um, lack of wealth, both at breakfast and lunch today.” That made Jae feel a little better. Besides, he would never let Emily Tyler ruin his and Rowan’s date. Which was only a week from now!

“Are you ready, Rowan?” Ben asked with a nervous smile. “Yeah,” Rowan replied. The two of them opened the door to the transfiguration classroom, where Andre and Beam were waiting for them. “Ah, there you are!” Andre said with a bright smile. “Wait till you see what I’ve got for you two.” Excitedly, Rowan and Ben ran toward the other two. “I’m also pretty curious to see it,” Beam admitted. Andre sighed: “Yeah, Beam, I’m sorry I haven’t finished your clothes yet.” “That’s alright,” Beam replied. “Now let’s see what you’ve got for Ben and Rowan.” “Yes,” Andre smiled. He opened his bag and pulled out a mannequin – he must have used an Extension Charm on the bag – wearing a black fedora hat and a black dress robe with red trousers, a yellow shirt, a black vest and red-and-gold-plaid socks underneath, complete with shining black boots and a red bowtie. Rowan assumed they were for Ben, given the Gryffindor colour scheme. “For you, Ben,” Andre confirmed. “That’s nice!” Ben exclaimed. “Classic Muggle fashion with a Wizarding twist. I love it!” Andre’s brown eyes lit up: “I’ve been looking through vintage Muggle fashion magazines, and I tried to find something that could bring out your sleek, golden hair and your rosy cheeks, without making your skin appear too pink. Want to try it on?” “I’d rather wait until I’ve seen what you’ve got for Rowan,” Ben said. “Right.” Andre pulled up two other mannequins, one of them wearing a long, blue dress with purple and silver floral print, the other wearing a long, black robe over a blue suit in a similar fabric, with a thin white shirt underneath. “Wow,” she whispered. “I made them blue, cause I know you like blue,” Andre explained. “And I’ve been inspired by traditional Indian dress robes, both for men and women. And since you’re genderfluid, I made a masculine and a feminine outfit, so you can wear something that matches your gender identity that day. You can also mix and match, if that’s what you want. Do you like it?” “Yes!” Rowan answered happily.  “It’s… so beautiful!” She wanted to try on both the outfits. The only problem was… “Perhaps we could go somewhere, um, private to change?” Ben asked. “Of course,” Andre said and conjured two changing boxes. Rowan and Ben went into each their box with their respective mannequins. Rowan decided to start with the suit and, as such, put a hair-shrinking charm on herself. Then she took off her school robes and put on the white shirt, then the suit, and lastly the shoes and the dress robe. It was very comfortable. She looked in the mirror. If Rowan would happen to be a boy to the Ball, he would be a very handsome, stylish boy. After admiring the masculine Rowan Khanna, she stepped out of the box, where she saw Ben wearing his outfit. It suited him. He looked much older, and much more wizard-like. “Wow, Rowan,” Ben said. “You look good.” “Thanks,” Rowan smiled. “You too.” “Blue really is your colour,” Andre said. “I’d love to be your partner, if you weren’t taken. And if I didn’t plan to ask… um, why don’t you try on the feminine outfit now?” “Sure,” Rowan said and went back into the box, wondering why Andre wouldn’t say who he planned to ask. She put the suit back on the mannequin and put on the long, blue dress. Then she cast a growth-charm on her hair and looked into the mirror. And in the mirror, there was an extremely beautiful girl, almost unrecognisable to Rowan. The dress was floor-length, so that Rowan’s large, clumsy feet were hidden, The sleeves were wide and flowing, giving Rowan an almost angel-like appearance. One could barely tell that Rowan was born “male”. She had read about gender euphoria in medicine and psychology books, but never felt it as strongly as this dress made her feel. She stepped out of the box, and met the eyes of Beam, whose jaw dropped. “You’re beautiful!” they gasped. “Not that you’re not pretty otherwise, but wow.” “Yeah,” Andre said. “You really are gorgeous. That dress really brings out your smile. I’d suggest some jewelry, though, and maybe another hairstyle. Perhaps a side plait, how about that?” “How does it feel to look better as any gender than I do?” Beam grinned. Rowan felt like crying; she wasn’t used to all those compliments, especially not on her looks. And to top it off, Ben said: “Jae is a very lucky bloke.”

Jae was sitting in his dorm, chatting with Charlie, as well as Bill and the seventh-year boy from yesterday (Jae had found out that his name was David), who were hanging out in the fifth year dormitory. Charlie had just received a parcel from his owl, Errol, who was sitting on Bill’s finger, sleeping. There was also a letter, which Charlie was reading out loud: “Dear Charlie We managed to find a fairly nice robe for a low price. I’ve been trying to rinse it and mend the holes, and now it looks as good as new. Perhaps it’s a bit outdated, but we hope you like it anyway. It’s green, since we know that’s your favourite colour. Have a nice Ball, and we hope you, Bill and Percy have a good time at Hogwarts. We miss you. Love, Mum, Dad, Fred, George, Ron and Ginny.” “Open it,” Bill said excitedly. Charlie ripped open the parcel. And it did, indeed, contain a bright green robe, as well as a pair of polished, brown leather boots and a small piece of green silk. “It’s… very green,” David said. “Try it on!” Bill demanded. Charlie pulled off his dark red jumper and put on the green robe. Then he looked in the large mirror beside his bed. Granted, it was very outdated, and it looked sort of like a dress, but Charlie did look very handsome in it. “I like it,” he smiled. “I would prefer a darker shade of green, but it’s more than I could’ve hoped for. I’m gonna write a thank you letter to mum and dad!” “Perhaps we can find a spell to darken it?” Jae suggested. “Nah, it’s okay,” Charlie said and changed back into his Weasley jumper. “What are you gonna wear, Jae?” “My daddy’s old dress robes,” Jae replied. “Wanna see it?” “Yes!” the three other guys said at the same time. Jae pulled out a box from his school trunk and opened it. He pulled out a bright red silk cloak with large gold buttons and with golden threads sewn into the fabric. “It’s called a hanbok,” he explained. “It’s been in my family for generations. At least, that’s what my daddy told me. Although my uncle told me that he bought it in a North Korean vintage shop back in ‘69. And my grandpa said that he won it in a duel with a portrait of an ancient Korean king. I’m not sure who to believe. But I think I’m gonna rock it, whatcha say?” “Definitely!” David said. “For sure,” Charlie said. “I bet Rowan’s gonna love it,” Bill said.

Rowan and Jae both struggled to concentrate on school work the next few days. Well, Jae always found it hard, but it was unusual for Rowan. The fact that the two of them were going together quickly spread around to the rest of the friend group… and to Merula Snyde. “So,” Merula whispered to Rowan (who today was a boy) and Beam during Potions class Tuesday morning. “I heard you’re going with that Smuggler-Kim to the Ball, Khanna?” “Yes,” Rowan said bluntly. “And who are you going with?” “Someone who’s way above you and Kim… and Bugge. Who doesn’t have a partner yet, as far as I’m aware?” “Oh, I’m sorry, Beam,” Rowan exclaimed. “Ben and I promised to find you someone… I’ve been so busy thinking about me and Jae that I completely forgot about…” “You may gossip about romance… after school,” said a cold voice behind them. The three of them turned around and met Professor Snape’s dark eyes. “Oh, I’m sorry, Professor,” Rowan piped. Snape glared at them and went to the next table, where Tulip definitely wasn’t following the instructions, judging by the exploding bubbles coming out of her cauldron and the rainbow coloured smoke and sparkles coming out of the bubbles. “Ten points from Ravenclaw, Karasu,” Rowan heard Snape say, before going back to his own potion. He had a bad feeling in his stomach: he had completely forgotten about Beam, who had been so nice to help Rowan with Jae and with the outfits. But he didn’t dare say anything. Snape was already mad at Rowan, and Tulip had already lost Ravenclaw ten points that day.

Jae was sitting in Muggle Studies class, chatting with Charlie and a Hufflepuff girl named Chiara Lebosca. “Charlie and I decided to go together, as friends,” Chiara explained and put a finger through the hole of a rectangular, black object, which apparently was called a video. “None of us really have a crush on anyone, but we both love to dance.” “You really don’t have a crush on anyone?” Jae asked. “I’m planning to marry a dragon,” Charlie said. Jae assumed he was joking, but then again, Charlie could be really strange sometimes… “I just don’t ‘get’ romance,” Chiara said. “I guess you have to experience it to understand it, but… I’ve never experienced it. Oh, Charlie, look! Here’s that movie about a green-skinned woman turning into a dragon!” “Sleeping Beauty?” Charlie exclaimed. “Yeah, I don’t understand romance either. Like, I understand ‘love’. I love my family. And I understand friendship, and obsessions – like I’m obsessed with creatures. But romance? Crushes? That just doesn’t make sense to me. I feel like that emotion is somehow… missing.” “Same!” Chiara said. “I thought it had to do with my lack of melanin, but then there was this Head Boy… I think his name was Adrian Shacklebolt? Who told me he felt the same way, and that Amortentia smelled like nothing to him, and he had lots of melanin. So… And Jae, you were going with Rowan Khanna, I’ve let Penny tell me?” “Yup,” Jae smiled. “And I partly have Ben Copper to thank for that. But to be honest? I’m mostly excited about the food. I’ve heard they’ll make a cake larger than Flitwick! Isn’t that impressive?” “No one can make better cakes than my mum, though,” Charlie said stubbornly. “The house elves are pretty good, too,” Chiara said. “I hope I don’t have to clean up after the Ball,” Jae thought out loud. “I want that night to just be me, and Rowan, and lots of cake.”

The second lesson for Rowan was Herbology with the Hufflepuffs. Professor Sprout usually didn’t mind when the students talked during the lessons, so Rowan and Beam were chatting while taking care of their plants. “Beam, I’m so sorry about not finding you a partner,” Rowan said earnestly. “I’m just not sure what your taste is.” “It’s okay, Rowan,” Beam reassured him. “After all, it is my decision who I want to take. Although I have no idea either…” “I’ll help you,” shouted a bright voice behind them. They turned around, and Hufflepuff student Nymphadora Tonks smiled at them. “You?” Rowan and Beam asked at the same time. “Yep,” Tonks said. “I’ve decided that I don’t want to take anyone to the Ball, so I can give everyone completely unbiased dating advice. Whatcha say?” Rowan noticed Beam’s shoulders sinking and their smile stiffening, but Beam replied, though in a very small voice: “I suppose a little extra advice couldn’t hurt…” Tonks put a lanky arm around Beam’s shoulder, and the two of them walked towards another table. Rowan looked around. Tulip was having a dirt fight with two Hufflepuff boys, Badeea was having a deep conversation with a Ravenclaw boy, and Penny Haywood was chatting happily with another Ravenclaw boy. Eventually, Rowan decided to join the table with Andre and a Hufflepuff boy named Diego Caplan. “Well, if that isn’t Jae Kim’s señorita,” Diego grinned at Rowan. “I’m actually a boy today,” Rowan corrected him. “Ah, my apologies,” Diego said. “Jae Kim’s señor, then. He told me everything about you in Potions class yesterday.” Rowan’s stomach rolled a little: “He did?” “Yeah,” Diego responded. “He really likes you, that Jae.” Rowan felt himself blushing and decided to shift the conversation away from himself: “Do you guys have partners? And Andre, thanks for the outfits, by the way. They’re really nice.” “You’re welcome,” Andre said. “I haven’t asked her yet. I probably should, before she decides to go with someone else… how about you, Diego?” “I’m going alone,” Diego said. “I want to be a free man. Having an official partner is so… restricting. You understand? I’d much rather dance with a lot of people.” Tonks seemed to have the same mentality, Rowan thought. But he didn’t understand why someone wanted to “dance with a lot of people”, rather than simply one person. Especially when that one person was Jae Kim.

Jae was meanwhile having History of Magic class with the Slytherins. As usual, Professor Binns didn’t notice that half the class was asleep, while the other half was admiring Slytherin girl Liz Tuttle’s baby niffler, which was trying to steal Slytherin boy Barnaby Lee’s finger rings. Even Merula Snyde seemed to find it cute. “You’d think that Lizard would bring the niffler to the Celestial Ball,” she said to everyone who listened. “I can’t imagine anyone would want to dance with her.” “She’s going with Barnaby Lee,” said a Slytherin boy whose name Jae didn’t remember. “He told me that last week.” “Oh, that makes sense,” Merula said. “All the losers are going together. Lizard and Barnaby, Lebosca and Weasley, Khanna and Kim…” “Don’t call Rowan a loser!” Jae snapped. “And who are you going with anyway? The snoring Billingsley over there? Or perhaps the drooling cyclope Ismelda Murk?” “Wouldn’t you like to know,” Merula muttered. “I can tell you so much that I’m not going with a loser. So that rules out… most of the school.” Their conversation got interrupted by a loud roar. Liz’s niffler had managed to get one of Barnaby’s rings and was now jumping away, heading towards a sleeping Gryffindor girl wearing some very large golden hoop earrings…

It was Thursday now. Nearly everyone who wanted to had found a partner for the Celestial Ball. In the Great Hall, Rowan was excitedly chatting with Ben and Penny at the Gryffindor table, while admiring the star-themed decorations that Penny had created. Andre, Tulip and Barnaby were sitting at the Ravenclaw table, presumably discussing outfits, judging by the various magazines Andre had brought. At the Slytherin table, Merula and Ismelda were talking very quietly about something that Rowan couldn’t hear. And at the Hufflepuff table, Rowan could see Beam, Bill and Tonks having a serious conversation; Beam still hadn’t found a date. “I really feel bad about it,” Ben said. “Beam convinced us to go to the ball, made Professor Flitwick cast Maximus Confidencia on me, helped you with Jae, and what have we done for them? Nothing! We’re the worst friends you…” “Ben, please stop,” Penny said quietly. “I’m sure Beam is more than happy that you two are coming to the Ball. You guys are excellent friends, trust me.” Rowan smiled. Penny could always lighten your mood when you were down. “Besides,” Penny continued, “it seems like Beam doesn’t need your help.” Rowan and Ben turned around and saw Beam point toward the Ravenclaw table. Bill patted Beam on the back and smiled. “Although I hope it isn’t Barnaby they’re planning to ask. He’s going with Liz.” “And Andre mentioned planning to ask a girl,” Rowan remembered. “And Andre knows that Beam is nonbinary and uses ‘they’-pronouns.” “Do you think that Beam wants to ask… Tulip?” Ben asked. Rowan saw Tonks giving Beam a little push, causing Beam to slowly walk toward the Ravenclaw table. They patted Tulip on the shoulder, and the two Ravenclaws left the Great Hall together.

Jae was playing Exploding Snap in the Gryffindor common room with Chiara, Diego, Charlie and the blond dormmate he didn’t remember the name of (Jae had nicknamed him Leviosa Boy). On another couch, Badeea was showing Liz her new kitten. Charlie had just gotten yet another match, and Chiara looked like she wanted to punch him. The portrait door swang open, and Tonks, Bill and Penny came in, along with a second year Gryffindor boy whom Jae recognized from the Quidditch team. “Whotcher, Gryffindor!” Tonks shouted. “Guess who the best matchmaker in our school is?” “Hmmm, I wonder… Tonks, perhaps?” Diego said sarcastically, as David came out from the boys’ dorm with a game of Wizarding chess, which he and Bill started playing. “Yup, twenty points to Hufflepuff!” Tonks grinned. “The curse breaker and the rule breaker. Well, how’s it going in here? Who’s winning?” “That goddamn Weasley,” Chiara gritted. Charlie laughed. “Aw, look at that kitten!” Penny squealed and jumped onto the couch with Badeea and Liz. “I heard you were going solo, Tonks?” Diego said. “I actually imagined that you’d go with Tulip,” Jae said. “Well, Beam’s lucky that Tonks is a strong independent morph.” Everyone laughed. “But a very clumsy morph who can’t dance.” “I can teach you,” Diego suggested. “Haha, no,” Tonks replied. “When I say I can’t dance, I really can’t dance.” “It’s true,” Penny shouted from the couch. “You don’t want to see zir dance. Zie dances like a mountain troll.” Tonks ran over to tickle Penny. Liz joined in, claiming that “that was an insult to mountain trolls”, causing Tonks to slap her, and soon all the four people in the couch had a tickle fight. “I’m not a very good dancer either,” Jae said. “But that shouldn’t matter. It’s more about having fun, right?”

It was Saturday afternoon. All the fifth year students were in their respective dorms, preparing for the evening. In the Ravenclaw girls’ dorm, Rowan was experimenting with her hair. She had decided to make it a little longer and tried to make a side plait, like Andre had suggested. “Let me help you,” Badeea sighed. She had just applied makeup on her left eye, but not on the right, so she looked quite funny. “I didn’t know you could braid?” Rowan said. “Oh, yes, I braid my mother’s hair all the time,” Badeea said. “Her hair is really long, so you have to be creative to make it all fit into her undercap. I think I’ll make a French braid, is that okay?” “Yeah,” Rowan answered. “Thank you. I like your eye shadow, by the way.” It was dusty blue and sparkly, looking like a late evening sky. “Would you like to borrow some?” Badeea asked. “I’m not sure how visible it is on dark skin and through glasses, but it’s worth a try, right?” Both Beam and Tulip were wearing it too, and they both looked very pretty. All of them were wearing blue dresses, so it would be fun to also wear blue eye shadow… “Let me try,” Rowan said. “You and Andre both really have a passion for beauty, huh?” “There’s a reason I like him so much,” Badeea smiled. “I still can’t believe he asked me out.” She was now done braiding Rowan’s hair and finished it by tying a hairband with a flower on it in the end of the plait. “Do you like it?” “Yes!” Rowan said upon looking in the mirror in front of her. “Thank you so much, Badeea. Now, about that eye shadow…” “That eye shadow,” Badeea repeated. “Yes. I got it right here.” She opened a little box, so Rowan could see the eye shadow sparkling at her. “Take off your glasses. Close your eyes,” she said. Rowan obeyed her, and she felt something cold and pointy, yet soft, touch her eyelids, followed by something larger and bushier, and lastly she felt something gently stroking her eyelashes. Then she felt her glasses being put on again, and heard Badeea say: “Open your eyes.” Rowan did so and looked at herself with a galaxy around her eyes. It was even more sparkly on dark skin, and the glasses only framed it so that you noticed it more. Her eyelashes looked much longer, causing her to look like some kind of goddess. Badeea really had a talent there. “I don’t know how to thank you enough, Badeea,” Rowan said truthfully. “That’s alright,” Badeea responded brightly. “A true artist can make every girl feel like the princess she truly is. And that includes the princesses who were princes just yesterday, and who tomorrow will be neither.” Rowan tried her hardest not to cry in order to not ruin the eye makeup, while slowly putting on her flower earrings and the silvery tree-shaped necklace from her grandmother. Badeea continued applying makeup on her right eye, while Beam and Tulip unsuccessfully practiced slow-dancing with each other. Rowan couldn’t stop smiling. She had never felt more beautiful before.

In the Gryffindor boys’ dorm, Jae was combing Charlie’s red hair, while Ben and the blond Leviosa boy were discussing the worst things that could happen at the Ball. “Perhaps we should try a higher ponytail,” Jae suggested. “Then you’ll look really handsome.” “Why not,” Charlie said. “And I love your hat, by the way.” “Thanks,” Jae replied. “It’s actually called a ‘gat’.” It was tall, thin, and black with bamboo pieces and golden beads hanging down the sides. “There. Now, what do you think?” Charlie looked in the mirror for a few seconds, before saying: “I like it. Great job, Jae. Now, for this robe… do you think it’s too… girly?” “It is a little girly,” Jae agreed. “But there’s nothing wrong with that! No one should have to conform to old fashioned gender roles anyway.” Charlie didn’t respond, only turned around a little in the mirror. Did Jae say anything wrong? “Look,” Jae began. “Charlie, I know you sometimes feel bad about your height, or your chest, or your voice, whatever. But you know what? No one feels truly great about their bodies. I’m even smaller than you, and I ain’t even trans. Ben feels insecure about literally anything, and I’m sure that even Bill has something he’s struggling with.” “Now that you mention it,” Charlie said slowly, “he did mention that he felt too pale or too gangly sometimes. Thanks for the pep talk, Jae. You look fabulous tonight.” “You too,” Jae said truthfully. Charlie did look good in his bright green robe, with his hair tightly pushed back, and with the little green silk piece tied around it. “Although,” Charlie continued, “you don’t want to put on some other… shoes?” “Nope,” Jae replied. “I feel comfy in my good old trainers. All they needed was a Scourgify, and Ben mastered that spell to a T.” “Alright, then,” Charlie grinned. “Are you guys ready?” Ben took a last look in the mirror, where he fixed his bowtie and tipped his hat. “Let’s go,” he said. “You look dashing,” Jae said to Ben. And he really did. “Thanks,” he responded, clearly appreciating Jae’s compliment. “And so do you.” Jae had to admit that he did feel very good-looking this night. He couldn’t wait to see everyone else, especially Rowan.

Rowan walked into the fully decorated Great Hall, which was covered in all kinds of star-themed decorations. Penny had really done a great job. The four house tables had been removed and were replaced by some smaller, round tables, some of them already filled with students, chatting. “Wow, Rowan! You’re stunning!” shouted a voice on Rowan’s right. She turned around and saw Barnaby and Liz sitting at a table, eating crisps, both smiling at her. Barnaby was looking very handsome in his plum coloured dress robes, and Liz also looked pretty, having loosened her dark hair from the usual cornrows and wearing a lime green, long sleeved, flowery dress. Rowan dumped herself down a chair to Barnaby’s left and said: “You both look amazing, too. Are you having fun, so far?” “Yes,” Barnaby said. “And the food is awesome. You should try it.” “I’ve talked to the elves,” Liz said, “and they promised me there’d be plenty of vegan options. Although I hope they don’t feel too stressed out. Perhaps we should go help them… whatcha say, Barn?” “Dunno. You got a point.” “There you are, Rowan!” said a voice behind them. “I’ve been looking all over for you.” It was Ben. “Hi, Ben,” Rowan smiled. “Looking good, huh?” “You too. So you went for the dress, I see?” Rowan stood up, and the two of them started walking around the Great Hall together. “Nice hat, Copper,” said a boy to the left that Rowan didn’t know. “And you’re beautiful, Khanna.” “Aw, thanks,” Rowan smiled. “I love your tie.”

Meanwhile, Jae and Leviosa Boy were stuffing themselves with licorice wands and chocolate owls, while Charlie was trying out all kinds of fancy drinks. “Perhaps I should try mixing them up,” he said. “I mean, they’re alcohol free. Nothing bad can happen, right?” He tried pouring a glittery, green-tinted drink into his glass filled with some bright purple liquid, causing the drink to turn sky blue and to start spraying itself onto Charlie’s face and robe. The other two boys laughed, as Charlie tried to make the drink stay still. “You Gryffindors are so stupid,” said Chiara, who had just arrived. She had curled her white hair a little and was wearing a pastel coloured tulle dress, making her look like some kind of elf. “You Hufflepuffs aren’t much better,” said Charlie and pointed toward Tonks, who had somehow managed to get zir foot stuck in a chair. Chiara and Charlie rushed to help zir, leaving Jae alone with Leviosa Boy, who soon left to talk to a group of Gryffindor girls. Jae decided to walk around, trying to find some other people to talk to. He caught a glimpse of Penny Haywood, who was looking especially cute tonight, sitting at a table with a lanky Ravenclaw boy whose name kept slipping from Jae’s mind. However, he knew that the boy usually wasn’t comfortable around too many people, but didn’t seem to mind when Penny was there. Jae decided to let them have their moment and went on. Eventually, he found a table with a group of Hufflepuff boys, whom he joined. “Rawr,” said one of them, grinning at Jae. “You look… flaming, huh?” Jae chuckled; his robe had golden fire print embroidered into it, and golden lion print in the sleeves. “Enjoying yourself so far?” Diego asked, with a pile of tortilla crisps and a bowl of salsa in front of him. “Yeah,” Jae said. “And you?” There were a bunch of “yeah”’s from the others. “You don’t mind me sitting here, do you?” “Not at all,” another boy said.

Rowan and Ben had now arrived at a table where they recognized Tonks, Chiara and Charlie. “Ey, we got two hotties right here,” Tonks yelled. “Come sit down.” Tonks was looking really cool with zir hair spiked up and with a magenta tint to it as opposed to the usual bright pink. “You guys look great, too,” Ben said. “Love your makeup, Chiara. Really brings out your eyes.” “Have you tried the jalapeño crisps?” Tonks asked. “I can still taste them,” Chiara said. “My throat is burning.” Rowan grabbed a handful and stuffed them in her mouth. They tasted deliciously. Ben was a bit more careful and started tasting one, and his face quickly turned pink. “White people are so weak,” Tonks mumbled and stuffed zir mouth with another handful of jalapeño crisps. “But Tonks, you’re white, too,” Rowan pointed out. Tonks closed zir eyes tightly, causing zir skin to become much darker. “Not anymore,” zie said. “Let’s go find some water,” Ben piped, with tears in his eyes. Rowan grabbed another handful of crisps, and the two of them went further around the Hall. They found some water for Ben, causing him to feel much better. They also saw Merula and Ismelda sitting at a table together, both wearing shiny, black dresses and dark lipstick. Merula actually looked quite beautiful, Rowan thought, with her brown pixie-cut hair straightened and pushed back, so you could see her face more clearly. They also came across Andre and Badeea, the former looking very stylish in his purple dress robes, and the latter sparkling from top to toe. “Nice outfits,” Andre said. They all laughed. “I see there’s been an artist in your face, Rowan?” “Yeah,” Rowan said. “It’s all thanks to you two that I feel like a princess tonight.” “Yeah, thank you, Andre,” Ben said. “So, are you two, you know… together?” “Yeah,” Badeea said. “We’re partners for tonight. And you, Ben…” “Haven’t managed to find anyone,” Ben said, sounding a little disappointed. “I’m sure there are lots of people who want you tonight,” Andre said and winked. Ben took a large gulp of water. “Let’s move on,” Rowan said.

Jae and the Hufflepuffs were now having a competition about who could eat the most salsa without burning. Diego had of course picked the hottest kind, and unlike Muggle salsa, there would be actual flames coming out of your mouth if you found it too hot. So far, Jae was doing pretty well. There were only three people left; Jae, Diego and a boy he had found out was called Tyler. The three boys each took a large spoonful of salsa, and Tyler’s mouth shot a little flame. “Tyler’s out,” Diego said, still pretty unaffected. “It’s only a matter of time before you give up, Jae.” He was probably right; Jae could feel the flames trying to escape his throat, and tears coming to his eyes. Still, he tried to play it cool: “I can barely feel anything,” he said with a rasping voice. The other boys laughed.

“Hi, there,” said a bright voice behind Rowan and Ben. It was Beam. They were looking very beautiful, with a blue, sparkly dress similar to Badeea’s, their hair lengthened and tied into a bun, and with their glasses off, so you could see their eyes and eyeshadow. They were smiling. “You look so beautiful!” Rowan squealed. “Can you see properly without glasses?” “Thanks, you too,” Beam replied. “It’s a bit blurry, but I don’t have any blue glasses, so I decided to sacrifice my comfort for a little beauty. So, aren’t you glad you both decided to come to the Ball?” Both Rowan and Ben had considered staying in their dorms, given that none of them liked parties very much. But luckily, Beam had convinced them both. “Yes!” Rowan said. “And I’ve gotten so many compliments.” “Doubly yes,” Ben said. “Everyone wants my hat.” The three of them laughed. “So, where’s Jae?” Beam asked. “Good question,” Rowan answered. “Let’s go find him.”

Jae had to give in now and let the fire escape his mouth. He heard some of the others gasp, and one of them mentioned him looking like a dragon. After he was done burning, he stuffed his mouth with chocolate owls. “Don’t you feel anything?” it came from a blond boy to Jae’s left. “A little,” Diego smirked. “Okay, yes, I do, it’s actually pretty hot. Excuse me.” He closed his eyes, opened his mouth and let a flame out. “That was fun! But you know what they say; never compete with a Mexican. Our taste buds are practically immune.” “I bet Rowan could beat you,” Jae said. “I should go find them, by the way.” He got up from his chair and started walking around again.

“Oh, look,” Ben said and pointed. “There’s Penny.” looking quite beautiful herself with her blonde hair waving around her shoulders and her yellow dress flowing like a giant flower. She had her arm put around the Ravenclaw boy from Herbology, who had an uncharacteristic smile on his face, like he was the luckiest person on Earth. And behind them was... “Bill?” Beam exclaimed. “You stopped by, after all?” He turned around and sent them a bright smile, causing Rowan to smile as well. “I promised Rowan I would,” he said. That’s right, Rowan thought. Bill had promised Rowan to come briefly and say hi to her. “You look fantastic, by the way.” “Thank you so much!” Beam said. “And did things work out for you with bringing a date, Beam?” “I did ask Tulip, and she said yes.” “Hello, everyone,” said a voice behind them. It was Emily Tyler, who was looking coldly at Penny. The Ravenclaw boy’s smile disappeared, and he slowly sneaked away. “I came to see if your decoration theme turned out better than mine would have. It didn’t. But mostly, I was looking for Bill and saw him walk in here.” “Looking for me?” Bill asked confusedly. “Why?” He had earlier had a crush on Emily, but she had rejected him for “being a Weasley”. Rowan and Ben decided to walk away, since Emily had a tendency to create drama wherever she went. “To rescue you from these kids so we can spend some time together,” they heard her say. They saw Bill slowly open his mouth: “You want to spend time with me, Emily?” “Yes,” she said. “I made a mistake rejecting you. And I don’t make mistakes often. So let’s get away from this Celestial Ball nonsense you’ve gotten involved in. We can go to The Three Broomsticks for a butterbeer. What do you say?” “I say…” Bill began and hesitated, before saying: “Not if you were the last witch on the planet, Emily. You’ve been too rude to my friends, and to me. If you’ll excuse me, I’ll see Rowan.” With those words, he walked toward Rowan and Ben and put on his big smile again. “So, how are you?” he asked. “You'd rather spend time with us than Emily?” Ben asked, sounding just as surprised and honoured as Rowan felt. Bill nodded. “If you guys knew what she’s been saying about you… especially you, Rowan. I think she’s afraid that I might actually fancy you.” Rowan’s heart skipped a beat. “But that’s ridiculous,” he said and shook his head. “Besides, you’re with Jae. Speaking of which, shouldn’t we go find him?” “Yes!” Rowan said.

The music had started, Jae was dancing around by himself, when he suddenly recognized Ben – who was quite good at dancing, he noticed. “Hi, Ben,” he shouted. “Have you seen…” and then, behind Ben, he saw… well, it was Rowan, obviously, but she was so pretty, with her long black hair in a side plaid, and silver sparkles from her necklace, earrings and dress. She also noticed Jae now, looking like a king with his red-and-gold silk robe, and with his shining black hat that made him appear a little taller. Their eyes met, and they both blushed, but none of them cared. Ben smiled and gave Rowan a little push. “You look beautiful,” Jae said. “Not that you’re not always beautiful, or handsome, or however you want to look, but wow… look at you.” “You look very dashing, too,” Rowan said, smiling so hard that it almost hurt, but she didn’t care. “Wanna dance?” Jae asked. “Okay,” Rowan said. “I’m not very good, though…” “Neither am I,” Jae reassured her. “So let’s just be noobs together, huh?” He put his right hand around Rowan’s waist, and she placed her left hand on his shoulder, and then their other hands grabbed each other, and they started dancing. They both tripped a lot and sometimes stepped on their own feet, but it was still a great feeling, dancing with the one they loved. Around them, mostly everyone else were dancing as well. Liz and Barnaby, Andre and Badeea, Beam and Tulip, Merula and Ismelda, Charlie and Chiara, Penny and the Ravenclaw boy, Tonks dancing in a big chain with zir fellow “solo” students, and Ben had – to their surprise – found himself a dancing partner: Diego Caplan. Bill was standing by himself, smiling at everyone. “I gotta go now,” he said. “Where?” Rowan asked. Bill winked at them. “I have to go study with David.” He then turned around and confidently walked out of the Great Hall. Rowan knew by now how “studying together” could end, and she had a feeling that Bill knew that as well. She smiled at Jae, and he smiled back. They had both fancied Bill for years, and they both knew that. But they were both happy for him and David. And they were both happy to be here with each other. It felt so unreal. The next song was much more upbeat, and that was very nice, so they didn’t have to talk that much. Or think, for that matter. Just focus on the dancing, and on each other’s eyes. And smiles. And their deep red faces, not sure whether it was the heat in the Great Hall, the exhaustion from dancing, or their feelings bubbling up, that caused it. It was probably all at once. The music slowly died out, and it was now time for eating. Everyone with official partners had assigned seats, and everyone else could choose themselves. Rowan and Jae were joined by Ben and Diego, who seemed to have had the time of their lives. “Who knew dancing could be so fun?” Ben smiled. “You’re not half bad,” Diego said. “Now, I wonder what’s for dinner?” His question was answered immediately: Goose with sweet potatoes and several vegetables and sauces to choose from, everything showing up on previously empty dishes on the middle of the table. Their glasses were automatically filled with whatever they were in the mood for drinking. Everyone started filling their plates. Ben explained how Professor Flitwick had cast a spell on him, so that he would be good at dancing, and that it would never wear off. Rowan had read almost every book in the library, and yet she’s never heard of such a spell. Neither had Diego, who knew practically everything about dancing. “There is Tarantallegra,” Diego said, “but that makes you automatically dance right now. I should probably ask him about it…” “I wish he would cast it on me,” Jae said. “Are you sure you’re not just… naturally good at dancing, Ben?” Rowan asked. “And that the spell only gave you confidence? ‘Maximus Confidencia’... doesn’t sound like a dancing spell to me.” “Whatever,” Diego said. “We had fun, and that’s what matters. Right?”

They had now finished their dinner, and now it was time for dessert. Jae was right in his prediction that there would be cake, although it wasn’t larger than Flitwick. They had each gotten their own cake, Rowan’s being shaped like a flower and covered with blue frosting, and Jae’s being orange with some sparkly, golden frosting that moved like fire. “That’s impressive!” he exclaimed. “I wonder how it tastes. Perhaps like orange? Or carrot? Who knows.” “I almost feel bad about eating it,” Rowan said. “It’s so beautiful.” “I’m sure there’s a spell to reconstruct it,” Ben reassured her. His cake was shaped and coloured like a rainbow. “Let’s just eat, shall we?” Diego said and started consuming his golden, heart-shaped cake. The other three did the same, and the cakes did indeed taste very nicely. Rowan’s cake tasted like vanilla and blueberry, whereas Jae’s tasted like orange, as he had rightfully guessed.

When they had finished their cakes, Professor Dumbledore stood up at the staff table to say a few words: “I hope everyone has enjoyed the Celestial Ball so far. Once again, thank you to Miss Penny Haywood for creating those wonderful, wonderful decorations. Now, you may leave the Ball if you want. However, I expect most of you to be staying. We will have a little more music. Now enjoy the rest of the night. Thank you.” He then sat down again. Music started playing again, and most of the students – and some of the teachers, too – went to the floor and started dancing with each other. Rowan and Jae decided to have one more dance, and then Rowan would go back to her dorm to get some alone time. The music became slower and slower, and the lights faded out until only a few decorations were lit. Jae’s hanbok really started shining in the dark, and so did Rowan’s jewelry, glasses, eye shadow and the silver print on her dress. They automatically took a step closer to each other once in a while, until their chests were glued together. They looked each other deeply in the eyes. Their faces also started approaching each other, until their noses touched each other, and eventually, their lips as well. Rowan had more butterflies in her stomach than she had ever seen on her tree farm at home, and Jae’s heart got surrounded by fireworks in all colours. Eventually, they let go of each other. If this had happened an hour ago, they’d both feel very awkward, but now all the awkwardness was gone.

“You guys kissed!” Beam was sitting on Rowan’s bed, clinging to their pet cat in excitement. “Yes, we did,” Rowan said, still in disbelief. “And you and Tulip? You were one of the last couples to leave, I noticed.” “We had so much fun, right, Beam?” Tulip said and dumped herself down on Beam’s left. “Yeah,” Beam smiled. “I’m glad that Bill and Tonks convinced me to ask you. I’d never be able to do it myself.” “Me neither,” Tulip admitted. “But now to the kiss. How was it, Rowan?” “Amazing!” Badeea had (finally) finished removing her makeup and sat down on Rowan’s right: “Sort of an odd match, isn’t it? You, a… well, a nerd – and that’s a compliment – and then Jae, this rebellious, very outgoing guy… although they do say that opposites attract. That also happened to you two,” she said and gestured toward Beam and Tulip. “Did you have a good time, Badeea, by the way?” Rowan asked. “Oh, yeah,” Badeea replied. “Andre is really amazing. He was so sweet. And you all really need my help removing your makeup. You’re pathetic.” The four of them all laughed.

“That lipstick really doesn’t suit you. It’s way too dark.” Jae’s and Charlie’s eyes met, and they both burst out laughing. Jae looked into the mirror on the wall, and his lips had gotten a dark red lipstick on them. “Oh, I look awful,” he said. “That’s why I’ve never kissed a girl,” Ben grinned from his bed. “You’ve never kissed anyone,” said Leviosa Boy. Ben glared at him. “Or… have you?” Charlie said and lifted an eyebrow. “You and Diego…” “No, we only danced,” Ben said quickly, his face going very pink. “Let’s talk about Jae and Rowan instead. How was it?” “To dance, or… to kiss?” Jae asked. “In both cases, awesome. Did you guys see how pretty she was? With her big, brown eyes… that flowing, flowery dress… her long, silky hair… and that bright, bright smile of hers… I feel so lucky that we ended up going together. I just wish that we could have another Ball, like, tomorrow or something. Now, Ben. Let’s talk about you and Diego. “ “Let’s NOT talk about me and Diego,” Ben said irritatedly. “I’m going to bed. Goodnight.” He pulled his blanket on and closed his eyes. “Are you planning to… you know…” Charlie began. “What?” Jae asked, but he almost knew what Charlie was gonna say: “Are you planning on taking a step further with Rowan?” “Maybe,” Jae replied. “Yeah, I think so.”

Sunday afternoon, Rowan was sitting by herself in the library, reading. This time, no one was surprised when the dark-haired boy in the yellow hoodie came in and dumped himself down on a chair beside her. “I want to talk to you about something,” Jae said quietly. “School, or… something else?” Rowan asked. “Something else,” Jae replied. “I want to talk about us.” “Okay,” Rowan said. She had half expected it. “I think I do, too.” “We went to the ball together, and we agreed it was a date, right?” Jae asked. “Yeah,” Rowan answered. “Are you saying what I think you’re saying?” “I don’t know what you’re thinking,” Jae said. “I’m no seer. But… now we’ve had our first date, our first dance, and our first kiss… how would you feel about going a step further?” Rowan’s butterflies were back now, and so were Jae’s fireworks. He hesitated and continued: “Would you like me to be your boyfriend?” Rowan’s heart paused. Jae’s heart was also completely still, waiting for Rowan’s answer. “You don’t mind me being… you know…” Rowan stammered. “Sometimes I’m a boy, and I was also born a boy… are you okay with that?” “Why wouldn’t I be?” Jae said. “You look incredibly handsome as a boy, and stunningly beautiful as a girl, and if you sometimes rather want to be neither? Still smashingly good looking. It’s like dating three amazing people at once, but they’re still the same. That’s a pansexual boy’s dream! I support you being genderfluid with all my heart.” Rowan smiled; she couldn’t believe what she just heard. “Oh, yeah,” Jae added, “Ben told me the name of you gender identity. You still haven’t answered my question, by the way.” “Oh, sorry,” Rowan said. “I say yes, of course. I’d love you becoming my boyfriend.” She turned around and gave Jae a little peck on the cheek. They both blushed. “But I do need help with some homework,” Jae said. “Would you like to help me?” “Yes, of course,” Rowan answered, relieved to have the topic changed. “What subject do you struggle with, my dear study partner?”

[throughtheglassdarkly]

Missing Pieces, part 5

Welcome back. When last you were here, Yova was being a gentleman and Day became a damsel in distress. Onward.

So of course the first thing you’re probably wondering is “How did Day get nabbed by the Knights of the Widow’s Walk?” I didn’t end up learning the whole story until much later, so this is all secondhand, but here’s the story as it was related to me. Rewinding to a few days before all this happened, Day had a pretty weird feeling that something was off. He couldn’t put his finger on it at first, but he confirmed it when he was out buying a six pack at his corner bodega and he saw a blue Subaru sitting out front. There wasn’t anybody in the car, but he was almost certain he’d seen that same car parked outside another stop he’d made a few days earlier.

Checking out the car, Day saw it had New York State plates and a large dent on the driver’s side door near the bottom, which was how he figured it was the same car. He also spotted a person wearing a puffy jacket and knit cap near the end of the block, leaning up against a street lamp and looking in his direction. He started heading after that figure, but when the dude saw him, he darted off. Day followed, but when he got around the corner, he saw that the figure had vanished into thin air. He did, however, see a paper fluttering in the wind with part of a red wax seal on it. Sound familiar?

Day took the paper back to his office and kept working on some of the paperwork for his PI license. None of us had heard from him much in a couple of days; he’d kept telling us he was really busy. Nothing much happened to him the rest of the day, but when he woke up the next morning, his window was open. He’d definitely remembered shutting it the night before, so he was super freaked out, grabbed his gun, and started going through the apartment. He didn’t see anyone, but did clearly see that a lot of his things were looked through: papers were askew, books and newspapers ruffled through, drawers slightly ajar. He told me later that he considered calling one of us, but then decided against it. After a minute, he saw something that got his attention: a picture that was taken of him while he was out with the rest of us. It was a picture from behind, mostly of him and Bella.

Day desperately needed to cool off, so he walked back to the bodega he was at the day before for a breakfast sandwich. As the cashier was ringing him up, he told Day, “Oh, speak of the devil. Someone was just asking about you.” Day looked around quickly but didn’t see anybody, so he asked, “Who?” “Oh, some tall guy came through, said he saw you come in the other day and said he’d seen you around a few places, asked if you were a regular here,” the kid said. “What’d he look like?” Day asked. “Uh, tall, kind of pale – no, pale’s not right-”

At this point, Day lost all pretense of patience, so he reached across the counter, grabbed the kid by the scruff of the neck and dragged him over the counter, saying, “I’m not asking you to describe a Mr. Potato Head, I’m asking you to describe him! What. Did. He. Look. Like?!” The kid was practically in tears and stammered out a description and Day let him go. The kid rang Day out as fast as he could, told him the guy was heading in the direction of Broadway, then ducked behind the counter to wet himself in privacy.

Day started stalking toward Broadway, eating his sandwich and steaming. He was looking around everywhere, trying to figure out where this tall guy in a knit hat and Mets jacket (that’s how you know he’s evil) might be hiding. He ended up passing a big collection of trash bins near one of the side streets and was so distracted looking down the nearby alley that he didn’t even see the guy come up behind him. He felt a hand on his shoulder and turned to look. The guy was tall, ashen, with a pig-like nose and one hand in his jacket pocket.

The dude told Day, “If you don’t want to see what I have in this pocket, and trust me, you don’t, we’re going to take a walk.” Day snapped back, “If your face is any indication, I don’t want to see anything you got under those clothes.” He steered day into the alley and told him they were going somewhere Day wouldn’t be a problem. “Somehow I don’t think you mean Tahiti,” Day said. “I could put a sign on it that says Tahiti if you’d like,” the man retorted. “Don’t do me any favors, bitch,” Day said. As he was saying this, he heard a burst of air come from his side and felt something really sharp hit his upper arm. He looked down and saw a dart and then his vision began to swim. The last thing he saw before passing out was the guy pulling a pair of handcuffs out of his jacket, wearing a thick leather glove as he did so.

So that takes care of one bit of backstory. But before I get into how we rescued Day, I think it’s only fair to share with you what happened on Yova’s date, which I also had to learn about secondhand. She’d scouted the bistro out a few days in advance and was already there when Marigold came running up, completely out of breath and apologizing for missing her bus. Now, Yova says she spotted the three of us, but decided to let it slide so as to not make a scene (personally, I think she’s saving face, but we’ll give this to her, we’ll give it to her).

After getting their drink orders in (Marigold, it turns out, is a Pepsi girl), they started having small talk, with Marigold super excited about what we learned about the Shepherd of Lonely Roads. She was talking a mile a minute about research and how thrilling it was, with Yova being Cool Hand Luke, letting her run her yap. After Marigold finished pumping Yova for information about the Shepherd, Yova turned the conversation back to Marigold, asking how long she’d been in the Autumn Court (two years), how she felt about the Court (she was the newest recruit prior to me and didn’t really care to get involved with the running of the Court) and the current relations of the Courts (she gave an analogy that Summer and Winter built the house, but Autumn and Spring were the ones keeping the walls up and safe). It was around this time that Yova noticed we were gone.

After they ate their meals, Yova suggested they grab some coffee at a nearby coffeeshop and take a walk around the neighborhood, which Marigold was entirely up for. Yova paid the bill and offered Marigold an arm, escorting her out of the restaurant. The line at the coffeeshop was a bit lengthy, but it allowed them more chances to be schmoopy with each other. Yova learned that once Marigold started talking, she could talk for a very, very long time.

So that’ll get you caught up to where my last chapter ended. As soon as Pam, Bella, and I finished staring in horror at the picture of Day and I got my senses back, I grabbed the photo and started entering the coordinates into Google Maps. What popped up was an old auto parts store a few towns over from Albany (a suburb of a suburb) that was closed permanently. The building, however, was still standing. I told Bella and Pam this and Bella grimly said there wasn’t much difference in her being there instead of Day. I think she was envisioning that she’d have to offer herself up in exchange for Day. I told her, “Look, after what we went through in Arcadia, I don’t want any of us being stuck somewhere again and forced to do anything. I don’t – I can’t let that happen. We’re going to get him out of there without having to trade anybody.”

Pam suggested at this point that we go get Yova. Her date had been over for hours now, but that didn’t mean she wasn’t busy. We looked up her schedule on her website and saw that she was doing accompanist work for a local high school production of My Fair Lady. We all grabbed our bags, I gave Paisley a couple crickets, and we made our way over. When we got in the auditorium just before intermission, I saw Yova with the tightest smile I’ve ever seen on her face. I couldn’t blame her: all the kids sounded like they’d been taking accent classes from Dick van Dyke in Mary Poppins.

At intermission, she came to join us and was clearly about to start a soliloquy, but I handed her the photo of Day to cut that off at the pass. As soon as she saw it, she got a look of pure murder on her face. She excused herself to talk with the production manager and inform him that a family emergency had come up and we all left the school. Yova was about to light up a cigarette when Pam cleared her throat and pointed to the “No Tobacco Products Within 250 Feet of School Grounds” sign. Yova, clearly bested by the full force of the Parent-Teacher Association, slunk away in shame.

When we got back to her crappy pickup and all piled in, we explained the situation. She said that we would need to speak with someone from the Summer Court, since one of their pledged courtiers was missing. We hotfooted it back over to my apartment and Yova reluctantly took out her phone to call Dania Sprint. Dania was the Runnerswift who was giving her dirty looks at the B&B, the one in desperate need of an “Oh, honey.” Unfortunately, she’s more or less the secretary of the Summer Court, so if anything needed to be relayed, she was the one to relay it.

Yova called Dania and explained the situation to her. Dania was about as sympathetic as a rabid musk ox and put her on hold. I put Paisley on Yova’s lap to get her to quell her murderous rage. After a few minutes of teeth-gritting hold, Yova finally got Cahir the Unyielding on the line. For once, he was all business as Yova explained the situation to him. He asked her for the address of where Day was being held and promised to send in some backup in case things went south. He told us that the recruits were only going to come in if things went really bad: he wasn’t going to risk any of their lives. He did tell us, “I don’t care what you have to do to get him out, just get him out.” He also insisted that if we learned anything else, we should call back and he would personally be the one manning the phone. After this conversation ended, I retrieved Paisley, Yova got her brass knuckles, and we all headed out.

While we were doing this, Day was finishing up a thoroughly miserable 48 hours as his body worked to purge itself of whatever drug had been pumped into him. His wrists were burning with a worse pain than anything he’d ever felt before and he couldn’t stay asleep. He was groggy and in pain, but at least he was awake. He realized he was in a small broom closet with a light flickering overhead. He tried kicking the door a few times and the same ashen-skinned man opened it, smoking a cigarette and looking like he’d rather be anywhere other than where he was.

“Oh, thank God, I’ve been calling the front desk for hours. This room simply won’t do,” he snarked. “Suck it up, my God, you’re so loud!” the pig-nosed guy griped. He told Day that he expected his friends to show up and do something stupid, but that he’d be able to go before too long. Day scoffed that we didn’t think he’s our friend (that one actually hurt when he told me it later). He asked for a cigarette and the other guy shrugged, put it in his mouth, and lit it. As soon as he did, Day took a puff and shot it out at the guy’s eye, nailing his eyelid. The guy freaked out, slammed the door, and stomped off.

Around this time, the rest of us pulled up in front of the auto parts store. It was a run-down area and we were feeling dangerously isolated. Bella was really quiet the whole time over and I wanted to check in with her and make sure she was doing all right. She shrugged in response and Yova told Bella that we weren’t going to let anybody take her. Bella was blaming herself, saying that she should have checked in with Day earlier than she did. It took most of us to get her to pull herself out of her funk, telling her that we all could have checked in with Day, but that he’d been super busy and none of us thought it was strange we didn’t hear from him for a couple of days. Bella squared her shoulders and grabbed a rock from the parking lot, getting ready to let it fly.

Yova decided to activate a contract that would prevent violence from taking place. And in entirely Yova style, she launched into Lady Hotspur’s speech from Henry IV. Day couldn’t hear any of that from inside, but he did hear his captor saying, “Hey, looks like you have friends after all, asshole!” Yova was about halfway through her monologue when the door cracked open and the ashen man leaned against the doorframe, saying, “So, uh, you certainly know how to make an entrance. Not sure I get the Shakespeare, but…” and he shrugged. Yova asked him to return Day and he said, “You want your friend back, you’re gonna have to come inside and talk terms.” They started bickering about where they were going to discuss the details and eventually came to a compromise of us standing outside and him standing inside. At this point, Day managed to kick the door open and we were able to see him from outside.

Yova introduced herself and asked the ashen man’s name, which turned out to be Hutch. She asked why his group was convinced Bella was a loyalist and Hutch said he couldn’t say, as it wasn’t his call, but that he knew some of his superiors had been cracking down as of late on fae elements in the area. They’d grabbed a few fetches and got some information, which is when the order to grab Bella went out. Yova tried to sweet-talk him and ask him about how they could come to an accord. He didn’t seem inclined to do any such thing, saying that if he let Day go and things went south, it would be his ass on the line. Bella got angry and asked him if he wanted to see the cut string on her neck. “I made sure I got myself cut before I even left out of that place, so whoever your little fetch is, they’re giving you wrong information and it’s putting innocent people at risk of getting hurt because of that,” she told him.

Hutch looked down at Bella’s neck and he saw the frayed thread. He got a – maybe guilty? – look on his face after that and said he understood what she was saying. He steadied himself and said, “I’m sorry if someone made the wrong call, but I still have to report back. So here’s what I think we can do, is if you guys can actually bring me the person responsible, if you guys can find who actually might be – I mean, if anybody in this freehold is loyal to those fuckwads back in Arcadia, if you can bring them to me, I’ll consider that as good a proof of innocence as anything. Even better if you can find out who’s trying to put the blame on you guys specifically.”

Bella preempted Pam in asking for his manager’s number. He told us there was a drop box where we could leave a message with any comments or complaints. I think he actually was serious.

Eventually, we managed to convince Hutch that turning Day over to us was in his best interest, since Day was the best investigator that we had. He went over and told Day that he was going to let him loose and that Day was going to have to walk over to us right away. As soon as the iron manacles were off, Day said he felt almost euphoric, like he wanted to cry from relief. As he left, he faked a punch at Hutch before he rejoined us outside. Hutch gave us one other clue before he slammed the door, saying that there was a beer garden in Schenectady where they learned some stuff. It was as good a place to start as any, so we decided that should be our next stop the following day.

Yova pulled out a cigarette and lit one for Day as well. He was looking grouchy and told us that we could let him have it for getting grabbed. Bella just glomped onto him and hugged him tightly, muttering something about being glad he was okay. He was completely taken aback by that and seemed to think we were just going to let him sit there. Bella said that she needed somebody to go to Hooters with and eat chicken wings (Yova and I both turned a little green at that, but for different reasons) and Yova said she needed Day to help her get stuff upstairs (so that’s her secret…). Day looked maybe a little uncomfortable at all the attention and said that he wasn’t used to having people care about him. “Well, you’re family now,” Pam said, and he looked sheepish.

Yova called Cahir and told him about the success of our mission. He was impressed and said, “You know, Miss Yova, I know you haven’t pledged loyalty to any particular Court yet, but given your extensive… talents, I think there would be quite a good place for you in Summer.” Yova surprised us all when she told him that she had been considering this very thing and unofficially pledged her loyalty to Summer over the phone. Cahir asked to talk to Day, asked if Day was okay, and told him it was good to have him back.

Now at this point, I actually wasn’t around. When Yova made her phone call, I slipped away and made my way down to the nearby 7-Eleven, in search of something in particular. When I got inside, I saw that the clerk who was working the graveyard shift was hiiiiiigh out of her mind. She looked at me and said, “Hey… you like donuts?” “I do like donuts!” I told her. “Great. We got some Krispy Kremes, here you go,” she said, handing me a couple boxes from behind the counter. I promised to tell her manager that she deserved a raise and she resumed watching a daddy long legs build a web on the wall. I got back to the group, donuts in tow, and made sure Day got the custard ones. I remembered him saying in Arcadia that they were his favorite.

And then Pam suggested we all get something to eat, so we made our way to Denny’s.

That’s a pretty good spot to stop it for here, so when next we get back, I’ll take you through our adventure at the beer garden and what we learned there. Until then, may all your high school drama students actually get in the ballpark of being on key.

[b-afterhours]

To Know Him (Epilogue)

summary: AU set in the summer of 1959 Gloria is desperate to see a world beyond the church and the small Texan town she grew up in. One day she runs into a bad boy with striking green eyes in the local greaser gang the Saint’s of Duke Street. She had only heard of their existence and shenanigans but upon meeting Bill she can tell he’s not as bad as everyone had warned…

warnings: cursing, sexual innuendos, some angst mostly fluff

author’s note: if you made it to the end i love you

spotify playlist: (recommended listening)

if you’re seeing this for the first time you can read part one here and if you need to catch up on previous chapters go here.

Austin, Texas 1964

In a humble, small three bedroom adobe styled house, the windows were all open to let the fresh air in. Gloria was padding around the kitchen barefoot and heavily pregnant making tacos for dinner. Through the open kitchen window, she could see her husband Bill and their three-year-old son in the backyard. They were building an outdoor brick grill, nothing fancy, but Bill had been talking about building one since moving in. He finally had enough money to buy cheap bricks second hand from an old building that had been imploded to create more houses for the growing city. Money was generally tight, Bill had a high position at the auto shop where he worked which helped keep them afloat. But most times it was Gloria’s teachers assistant earnings that ultimately tide them over.

When Gloria became pregnant again, it forced them to move from their tiny one bedroom apartment near campus to a proper home a little further out. She had offered to take another job but with her being in school Bill practically forbade it and was adamant that she focus on her studies instead. Besides, it was already a handful raising their son on top of that. So together they made the decision to apply for a loan on a house which was difficult since neither of them had credit history.

~~~

A few months before they were at the bank when the loan officer Mister Hansen, a lean and wiry man, had stepped away from his desk to gather paperwork so that they could open an account to begin building credit. With Gloria due to give birth in five months they didn’t have time to deal with such nonsense. They looked at each other both despondent and lost on what to do until Bill’s eyes lit up with a plan.

“Cry,” Bill leaned towards her and whispered.

“What?”

“Just make him feel bad. I… I don’t know what else to do… maybe I can sell my bike but-”

“No. No, hold on,” she said focusing at her feet thinking of the some of the saddest thoughts she could muster. Being pregnant meant, at times, she could be overwhelmingly emotional so it didn’t take much. And she wasn’t going to have Bill sell his motorcycle, she loved that thing just as much as he did.

“He’s coming back,” Bill said between his teeth as he watched the loan officer walk back from an office room.

Mr. Hansen walked into a scene when Gloria threw her arms around Bill’s neck sobbing loudly. Bill was shaking his head at him looking miffed as he rubbed the middle of Gloria’s back pretending to comfort her.

“Oh goodness, Mrs. Skarsgård? What’s wrong!?” He asked in a panic as he pulled on his tie nervously. “I-Is she okay?” He asked Bill this time but Gloria drowned him when she sobbed dramatically, loud enough to echo off the walls of the bank.

“Does she look okay to you?” Bill said glared at him with contempt.

“What c-can I do?” His eyes were wide while he bit his lip worried and taking nervous glances at the other patrons looking on concerned.

“She’s upset about the loan situation. We really need it.”

“Please Mr. Hansen,” Gloria turned to him with a flushed face and wet cheeks as he squirmed in his seat.

“M-ma’am you know with no credit history-”

Gloria hopped up, putting her hands on her hips, pushing her small pregnant belly out further. “I think…” she looked over at Bill whose brows were furrowed wondering what kind of stunt she was about to pull. “I think I’m going into early labor!” She began to take deep erratic breaths and then inhaling through her nose and exhaling loudly through her mouth as if to tame her own breathing which earned a gasp from a teller watching on.

“You’re upsetting my wife, Mr. Hansen. This could be easily fixed, we just need the loan!”

“Oh, Jesus Christ!” Mr. Hansen grumbled. “Is she really going into labor?!”

Gloria put a hand on her belly then and doubled over wailing and bracing herself on the edge of his desk. “Mr. Hansen, please. I’m pregnant and we have a young son who’s already overstayed at his babysitter's...”

“Baby, you should sit down...” Bill said adding to her act.

“No!” She pushed his hand away. “This baby is coming!” She hollered.

“Jim!?” A tall man said sternly at the loan officer when he swiftly opened his office door enough to show himself. “Get it together?” He was most definitely a higher up.

“Ma’am! Ma’am! Please!!” Mr. Hansen had to yell over her loud cries. “P-please sit, I-I’ll get the processing papers.”

Gloria suddenly took a deep breath, “fine, thank you.”

“You don’t have to speak to her like that either man,” Bill said indignantly when Mr. Hansen quickly went on his way to get their loan papers and to get them the hell out of there.

They left the bank in their used Mercury Comet in which they traded their truck for before the transmission went out and nearly died laughing over their charade with their official loan papers finally in their possession.

~~~

Bill glanced through the open window from outside their home and saw that Gloria was already setting the plates on the table inside. He smiled to himself for a moment before motioning to his son to pass on another brick.

“One more and we gotta go in Jasper,” he said slapping some mortar down with a rusty trowel.

“Awl weady?” His son said dusting his little hands on his overalls after handing him a brick.

“Mama’s tacos are ready, son,” he said stacking the brick evenly, “And then it’s bedtime.”

“Tacos?!” Jaspers yelled excitedly causing Gloria to look out the window and wave for them to come in. Bill swooped his son in his arms walking him inside and over to the sink to help him wash his hands before eating.

“Noni coming for your gwadu-lashun mama,” Jasper asked during the middle of dinner while he picked out the pieces of carne asada from inside his corn tortilla to eat. “Noni” was the name he had affectionately given Gloria’s mother. She visited maybe the times a year and tomorrow she was making an extra special trip to attended her daughters' graduation from the social services program at the University of Texas.

“Yup and she’s excited to see you Little Bear!” Gloria reached over and lightly tickled his tummy.

Bill helped wash and put away the dishes after dinner while Gloria danced around the living room with their son to Marvin Gaye’s, Can I Get A Witness on their old radio – miraculously it never broke down over the years – to wear him out for bed. It was their routine and sometimes Bill would cut in, dancing around with Gloria, dramatically dipping her to make Jasper laugh.

“You know these moves won your mama over,” he would sometimes say while Jasper looked on amused.

“Oh hardly!” Gloria would say laughing in his arms.

Bill took the radio outside to listen to as he finished up the grill while Gloria was inside putting Jasper to sleep. She soon joined him with a cold glass sweet tea in hand and her hair wrapped in a scarf to protect her curls. She was wearing short stretchy cotton shorts but it couldn’t be seen underneath her husbands lose fitting mechanic shirt she wore. Since she was eight months pregnant now her nightgowns no longer fit her. The mechanic shirt was practically new since it was hardly worn being even too big for Bill.

“Speaking of Baby Love,” Bill winked at her as The Supremes played on the radio while he was hunkered down on one knee knocking bricks into place that had shifted at the bottom.

Gloria playfully curtsied before taking a seat on a wicker chair next to him. “Is that thing going to be ready for tomorrow?”

“Thing? I’ve been working hard on this. Me and our son,” he kidded with her.

Gloria lightly laughed. “It looks good, dear. And I prefer Jasper doing these kinds of activities with you rather than you teaching him how to throw knives. He’s too young for that.”

“He’s pretty good for his age though,” he said stacking the last brick and smirked at Gloria who was shaking her head at him. “Anyway, the neighbors from the old complex are letting us borrow their cot for your mom again.”

“Right, that’s what I came to talk to you about.”

Bill stood up straight and frowned a little suspicious of her tone. “She’s still coming right?”

“Yes... But she said she’s made reservations at a hotel downtown?”

“A hotel? What happened to her being excited to see the house over the phone? She’s even got the nursery all to herself this time around.”

“I have no clue,” Gloria simply shrugged and took a sip of her drink before passing it off to Bill. “She’ll see the house during the cookout, I guess?”

“Weird,” Bill said scratching his head wondering why Estella made the sudden change.

“I’ll call Marty in the morning. She was just going to stay in that cheap motel we lived in but she can stay here now.”

“Good ‘cause it’s not very fun talking James into letting me borrow that cot, you know how grumpy he is?” He said taking Gloria’s hands and pulling her up from the chair and on to her feet. “And that cheap motel has a lot of sentimental value to us we spent our wedding night there, sheesh.”

“I know, I know. I was just sayin’,” she lightly laughed as Bill guided her inside with a hand on her lower back as she waddled her way in.

“Are you and baby girl gonna make it across the stage without help tomorrow?”

“We’ll make it just fine. And, you’re so sure it’s a girl, don’t you? We won’t know un-”

“Until they’re born, I know,” he lightly laughed. “I just have a feeling,” he said as they finally entered their room.

“Well don’t be disappointed if it’s another boy,” she said slipping into bed. “Don’t forget the radio outside.”

Bill assured he wouldn’t before his shower and he kissed her goodnight. When he came back she was fast asleep, her shirt had ridden over her baby bump. He paused at the threshold and turned his head to briefly glance at his son sound asleep in his room catty-corner to theirs. His heart fluttered, feeling content, at peace even. Moving to Austin with his girl sounded like a dream when they left their little hometown. Reality set in quickly though, it was hard at first but they made it work together. It might have not been a perfect life wrapped neatly with a bow but to be where they were even with the struggle was worth it.

Recently, he was even in talks with his boss, an old friend of Alex’s, over Bill possibly taking over and owning the shop. He hadn’t mentioned that to his wife yet, it wasn’t set in stone and he didn’t want to disappoint her if it fell through but it looked promising. Since moving into their home and with Gloria graduating he felt everything was slowly but surely heading to where he could finally tie off that perfect little bow.

The late nights where he’d stay up with her while she studied and graded student papers were over. So late he’d basically beg her to take study breaks which was actually how they unexpectedly ended up pregnant with Jasper actually. When he was born Bill was in charge of getting him out of her hair for a few hours to work. Most nights Bill would accidentally fall asleep on the couch while she sat crisscross on the living room floor with textbooks and notebook paper encircling her. Eventually, Gloria would nudge him awake to follow her to bed and he’d apologize but she was never upset with him. After all, he woke up at the crack of dawn, coming home by five in the afternoon, six days a week with Sunday’s off. He’d even take his lunch breaks late so that he could pick up Jasper from the babysitters when he was finally walking age and watched him during the rest of his shift while Gloria was at school. It was important to him that she focus on her studies, he took her from their small town to do so. He did everything he could so that she could succeed and he was so proud of her.

After reminiscing, he slipped into bed next to Gloria causing her to stir and mumble something incoherent. When he wrapped her arms around her she mumbled again.

“Sorry, did I wake you,” he asked softly.

“It’s the baby, she keeps moving,” she said backing into him, molding her body into his.

“You said ‘she’,” he lightly laughed. Even with her back towards him, he knew she was rolling her eyes at him. “Gloria?”

“Yes.”

“Are you happy?”

She furrowed her brows perplexed as to why he would wonder such a thing. She pushed his arm off her waist and proceed to turn around with much struggle until Bill grabbed onto her hip helping her turn towards him the rest of the way. “Of course I am? Why? Is everything okay?”

“Yeah, I was just wondering is all...” he said rubbing the side of her hip.

“Look what you’ve given me Billie,” she softly kissed his tip nose. “You’ve given me two babies. A new car. You got us a house-”

“Technically, you did,” he said with a laugh.

“Well, it was your idea. And I’m graduating from my dream college ‘cause of you. I wouldn’t have been able if you never took me out of that shitty town,” she said now making him laugh. “I can’t thank you enough. I owe you everything for loving me as much as you do.”

Bill nodded appreciatively and sighed in relief. “I wish I could give you more.”

“I know you do. But what we’ve got now is perfect,” she pressed her lips to his. “Feeling better now?”

“If you turn around I’ll feel even better,” he said gripping on to her bottom.

“Billie! We have to wake up early,” she giggled when he buried his head in her neck kissing and tickling her with his stubble. She didn’t need further convincing to turn to her other side though. …

The morning of graduation the husband and wife were running around the house in a tizzy to get themselves and their things ready. It didn’t help that Gloria’s friend from school, Maxine, was already waiting outside in her boyfriends' car honking the car horn loudly for her either. It was mandatory that students be at the amphitheater before the guests.

“Christ!” Bill said frustrated with the noise. He walked to the front door still only in dress trousers and a white tank top. “Don’t they know we still got a kid sleeping in here,” he said opening the door and put his finger up to give Gloria another second.

Gloria rushed out of the room, her black graduation gown still unzipped over her light orange dress – to correlate with the school colors – as she hastily put on a pair of faux pearl button earrings. Bill took her hand and helped her out the door and down the porch stairs.

“My hat!” She said putting a hand to her head realizing she left it behind.

“I’ll get it,” Bill ran in the house looking first in the bedroom and then the bathroom. When he rushed back to the room to look again he saw the cap sitting on the couches armrest in his peripheral. He snatched it up and ran outside, passing it through the open window.

“Thank you,” she craned her neck out to kiss him. “There’s uh eggs... I only made eggs...” she bit her lip feeling bad for not preparing her usual breakfast of eggs, bacon, and toast.

“It’s fine. I’ll get Jazz ready and I’ll see you in a bit baby,” he assured her.

Bill waved her goodbye by the front door before going in. Jasper was rubbing his sleepy eyes as he emerged from his parents' bedroom, looking for them, and yawned loudly. He strode over to his son taking his hand and ushering him to the dinner table.

“Where’s Mama?”

“Well see her soon but we gotta eat and get ready for her graduation,” he said walking to the kitchen scooping lukewarm eggs on a plate.

“Gwadu-lashun,” Jasper exclaimed as he reached for the bottle of ketchup on the table.

Shortly, the father and son both found themselves in the bathroom together grooming and listening to a Kinks song on the radio. Jasper sat on the sink counter nodding his head along to the music and watching his father shave and giggling over how silly he looked with shave cream on his face.

“You’re gonna have to do this one day too,” he playfully nudged him with his elbow. “Get a little grease and put it in your hair for me.” Bill slightly cringed when Jasper mashed his hand into the tin of Tres Flores pomade making a mess.

“This much,” he asked spreading his little fingers coated thickly in the stuff.

“Uh, hold on,” Bill reached over wiping the majority of it off his hand with his finger and scraping it along the side of the tin, “okay go ahead, rub it between your hands first.”

He watched as his son messily rubbed the hair grease in his dark hair, leaving some sections of it spiked up out of place. When Bill finished shaving he went in on Jasper’s hair parting it to one side and slicking it back with his comb.

“Does it look, good Papa,” he asked looking up in wonder.

“You’re lookin’ like a real heartbreaker, kid,” he said taking a chunk of hair from the front of his small head and curling it with his finger. “There, take a look,” he pointed at the mirror behind his son and watched as he turned around and grinned proudly at his appearance. He always liked to look just like his daddy. “Alright,” Bill said picking him up and putting him down to run off and play in the living room while he finished getting dressed.

They were both almost out the door with time to spare when the house phone started to ring. Hardly, anyone called the house they only had it to talk to family back home and Bill suspected that it was one of his brothers calling to say they couldn’t make it to the cookout after all.

“Hello?” Bill said answering with Jasper hanging on his hip playing with one of his suspender straps.

“Bill? Uh, it’s Dom we got an issue with a Chevy in the shop and-”

“Then figure it out?” He snapped, cutting him off. “Are you kidding me, Dom? It’s my day off, call Johnny.”

“You don’t think I tried, he didn’t answer. This looks like something in your expertise though...”

“No, I can’t. My wife is graduating in less than an hour and-”

“It’ll only take a moment, I swear.”

Bill closed his eyes, shaking his head in comtempt. “Ah fine,” he groaned, “I’ll be there in a second,” he slammed the phone. “Bullshit,” he muttered.

“Bullshit?” Jasper repeated.

“Shhh no, no we don’t say that okay? At least not in front of your Mama... But yeah, bullshit.”

At the auto shop, Jasper would hear all sorts of curses spouting out the mouths of frustrated mechanics. And that was about all they could hear when they pulled up to the auto shop even over the loud air compressors and drills. Jasper sprinted into Dom’s portly arms when Bill got him out of the car. In the beginning, when Bill began to bring his son to the shop his colleagues would tease him about doing what they called, ‘a woman’s job’. He almost got into a fight about it once but soon everyone had grown to love having Jasper around. Besides, it was it was worth not having a wrench thrown at their heads.

“Well don’t you two look sharp!” Dom said in his deep aged voice next to the smoking engine of the Chevy.

“Yeah, we have shit to do today Dom,” Bill said rolling his sleeves up. “And watch your greasy hands on his clothes,” he said peering into the engine. He furrowed his brows and shook his head. “Let me see him,” he motioned for Jasper. He fanned the bitter smoke away a bit with his free hand and then pointed at an engine part. “You know what that is,” he asked his son.

He squinted his green eyes, the same as his fathers, and stuck his little pink tongue out in thought. “Cabo waiter!”

“Carburetor! Right!” He said proudly kissing him on the forehead. “Dom, even my three years old knows! It’s overheating.”

“No way, I would have spotted that,” Dom said in disbelief buffing his dirty glasses on his greasy mechanic shirt. He peered into the engine and when he turned his head to speak to Bill he was already walking back to his car.

“Don’t call me on my day’s off Dom,” Bill hollered. “You better take that thing out or it’s gonna fry the wires underneath!” He said slamming his door closed.

The father and son had one last pit stop to make on their way. There was a corner house close to the amphitheater that Bill always drove by on his way home where an elderly woman grew beautiful flowers. Her roses he was specifically after. He crept around a shady section where he wasn't easily seen and kneeled on one knee, taking his switchblade out from his back pocket.

“Tell me if a car comes by Jazz,” he said taking the blade along the rose stems to shed them of their thorns.

Jasper was intently watching the road, as he snipped a few roses from the bushel. Bill didn’t want to steal but there simply wasn’t a budget to buy any, unfortunately. He also somewhat hated that his son was always a perfect partner in crime it concerned him at times.

”Here,” Bill said handing Jasper a half dozen of pilfered roses to him. “You hand these to your Mama when we see her.” ...

Being later than he wanted Bill had to settle for a seat near the back of the amphitheater. Gloria was turned in her seat scanning the audience for him, no doubt, and then waved happily when she found her little family. Bill looked around after, searching for her mother and Marty. Rita couldn’t make it, she had her own graduation up north to attend. Marty had only gone to school long enough to get her secretarial license and landed a decent job at a law firm in Dallas almost two years ago. He spotted Marty sitting with her friend Suzie, whom Bill and Gloria always suspected was more than just a friend but didn’t question it. Marty walked to the beat of her own drum anyway. And then just a few rows and seats down he saw Estella, wearing one of her big white church hats, she waved happily and so did Jasper who shouted happy to see her. When she sat back in her seat Bill froze and protectively held Jasper closer to his body. Sitting right next to Estella was Gloria’s father, looking as stiff as Bill felt in that moment.

Anger and annoyance suddenly washed over him. He hadn’t a clue why Robert felt he had any right to attend Gloria’s graduation. He didn’t even want her to go to college from the very beginning. And he certainly knew if his wife saw him after all these years of pure radio silence she wasn’t going to have it. Especially, when it came to their son who hadn’t a clue he even had a grandfather at all. They had intended to tell him when he started asking questions when he was younger. Until one evening over the phone, Estella relayed Robert’s message to just, “not mention him at all”. Gloria was angry, it was the first time Bill heard her say, “fuck it”. She rarely said any of the harsher curse words and he hadn’t heard her say it since.

Bill took a deep breath, nervously touching his crucifix necklace through his dress shirt and decided to push the situation out of his head long enough to see Gloria walk across the stage and get her diploma in peace. When she was called to the stage he cheered, standing with Jasper on his shoulder, and was also happy to see that an administrator on stage took it upon themselves to help Gloria waddle up the stairs at her pace. When Gloria was handed her diploma she looked directly and her husband and son from the stage, waving to them and only them. They were her greatest success. And the diploma was sure as hell a great add on to that, she worked hard for it too. …

Bill was outside of the amphitheater in a hurry as Jasper was getting antsy and needed some room to run around. It also gave him time to figure out what to do with the “Pastor Castillo situation”. He thought about confronting him, to tell him to leave before Gloria ever knew he was in town. But every time he envisioned himself doing so, he couldn’t help but see himself just decking him in the middle of the crowded plaza. And as much as he'd like to, he knew he couldn’t do that, it would only embarrass his wife and make things worse.

Marty with her girlfriend Suzie found their way Bill who was leaning against a gas street lamp watching Jasper run around on the grass. They happily hugged and greeted each other.

“Look at you in a suit! Never thought I’d see the day,” Marty laughed, teasing him. Bill didn’t really appreciate the comment, he had bought it second hand and it fit weird on him. “Have you spotted her yet,” Marty asked Bill as she took Jasper in her arms and gave him kisses all over his face exclaiming how big he had gotten since she last saw him on New Years.

“Too crowded,” Bill said chewing on his lip as he scanned the faces steadily filing out out the amphitheater.

“You should go look for her,” Marty suggested.

“Nah, I don’t want to leave him,” he pointed at his son.

“Bear, Suzie and I can watch him it’s no problem...”

Bill was hesitant about what to do for a moment before sighing loudly. “Marty,” he leaned closer to speak privately with her, “Glo’s father is here.”

Her eyes widened in disbelief. “No fu-,” she stopped knowing Jasper could hear, “way!”

“What,” Suzie asked pushing her long, pin-straight dishwater blonde hair back, “is that a bad thing?” She had been standing close enough to be in the loop.

“Very bad,” Marty told her. “What can I do to help? I can take Jazz somewhere else if you need me to,” she suggested.

Bill peered into the crowd that congregated around the exit, desperately searching for Gloria so that they could all ditch the place together. She finally emerged from the crowd, with a smile on her face oblivious to what was going on. And Bill was hoping he could keep it that way.

“We’re all leaving together, okay?” He told Marty. “Don’t say anything about him,” he stressed.

They all quickly congratulated Gloria giving her hugs and cheek kisses in a hurry. Jasper had reached out from Marty’s arms to be held by his mother. He handed her her roses which she happily thanked him for with a kiss. Soon after Bill took her hand to get her to follow him back to the car.

“Whoa, I can only go so fast,” Gloria said. “What’s the rush?”

“What’s the wush, Papa?” Jasper parroted but was tuned out by his father.

“Just go at your pace, honey. I just need to get the grill fired up and ready,” He said; it wasn’t exactly a lie.

When they got curbside Bill could see the car parked several cars down and was finally hopeful that they’d get home without a hitch. Until a chill ran up his spine when he heard Estella calling Gloria’s name in an excited sing-song voice behind them. Before he could think of a distraction his wife was already turning her head. He watched her expressions switch like day and night from excited surprise to dread and confusion and anger all at once. Instinctively, Bill swiftly took Jasper and the roses from her arms and passed them along to Suzie, who stood closer. He protectively stood in front of Gloria but she pushed past him. Suddenly her waddle was gone as she stomped toward her parents or more so her father.

“Gloria just leave it,” Bill said grabbing her arm after taking a few long strides to get to her.

“No! What is he doing here?!” She yelled but families and graduates were too busy in their elated bubbles to pay any mind. Even Marty and Suzie looked away and took on the job of distracting Jasper from the situation.

Her mother approached cautiously with her hands up to keep Gloria from coming any further. Not to shield her daughter from her husband but just the opposite. “Honey, relax you’re pregnant and we’re in public.”

“I don’t care. What were you thinking? Why would you allow him to come?” Her voice cracked, feeling betrayed.

Estella sighed, lightly shaking her head. “I know. I know how you feel but regardless he’s still your fa-”

“You know better than to tell me that,” she said causing her mother’s face to fall, feeling regretful. “He hasn’t spoken a single word to me since I left! Not a damn word Mama!” Her eyes were glassy, her bottom lip quivering a little.

“Gloria,” Bill said softly putting a hand around her waist, “this is your day baby we don’t have to do this. But if you must we can do it at home.”

Gloria’s scoff turned into a laugh. “Oh no, he’s not allowed over. Billie,” she turned her head to look up at him, “you’re not going to change my mind.”

“Baby girl,” her father said finally speaking up after looking on vexed yet stoic. “I didn’t come for a fight.”

“Then what did you come here for?” She snapped at him. “I know you’re not here to see me. Did you come to see if I actually graduated? To see if it were real? You wanted to see if me or my husband had failed like you wish we would.”

“Of course no-”

“Oh don’t lie to me again! I’ve heard enough of them all my life.”

Pastor Castillo face twisted ugly as he grew angry, dropping all senses, revealing his true self. “You know what Gloria Esperanza Cast-”

“Skarsgård. It’s Skarsgård, Daddy but I know you won’t ever say it. Would you? I’m done.” Gloria stepped away shaking her head leaving Bill who lingered behind.

“Uh I’m sorry Estella,” he said giving her a little nod.

“It’s fine she’s hormonal.”

“No,” Bill shook his head, “she has every right to be upset. Pastor Castillo,” he said straightening his back standing taller. “I hope you’ve seen that as a husband I’ve taken care of your daughter. If that’s all you get out this at least know that. I don’t care if you don’t like me and I never will. Nothing has ever been about you,” he shrugged. “Estella,” he looked over to her, “you’re still more than welcome to the cookout but sorry no guests.”

Estella nodded understandingly. “Thank you.”

“Call the house. I’ll even have Ace pick you up on his motorcycle,” he smirked knowing he had pissed Pastor Castillo off with that one. …

At the cookout, things were joyous, the incident with Gloria’s father behind them. After all, it was Gloria’s day. Bill stood by his freshly built brick grill sweating and chatting over the heat of it under the sun. Gloria was with her friends chatting as well all while keeping an eye on her son, his cousins and kids from other Saint gang members playing in the backyard. Her mother was even in attendance sans Robert, how that went down Gloria didn’t bother to ask. Tucked to the side of the yard were the whole Saint’s of Duke Street gang. Not just Ace, Wolf, Snake, and Fox but Rich, Winslow, Spark Plug, Stoney, and Jed with their respective partners too. All of the men, in their signature leather jackets, were getting rowdy and heated discussing the best bike parts and who had the fastest “rig”.

Gloria glanced over at Bill and excused herself for a moment. He was alone at the grill smoking a cigarette with a concentrated look on his face since his brother’s overheard the rest of the gang’s arguing, leaving him to instigate. He felt familiar arms wrap around him and a baby bump press against his back as he flipped patties one last time.

“Everything alright?” He said chucking his cigarette to the side of the yard.

“Yeah,” she sighed waddling over to a wicker chair right by him. “I just need to sit down, my feet are starting to hurt.”

Bill stepped away from the grill for a moment and came back with a used wooden beer crate, flipping it upside down and lifting her feet to rest on top of it.

“Thank you,” she mouthed.

Jasper came running up to her then with brown, crunchy cicada exoskeletons in the air to show his mother. He clamored his way up to her lap in the spare space her belly hadn’t taken over.

“Gentle, Little Bear,” Bill said.

“I’ll get ‘em,” Ace said sauntering back sipping on a beer.

He lifted his nephew from Gloria’s lap and into his strong arms pretending to be extra interested in the cicada husks to please his nephew. Soon Gloria and Ace were discussing a family fishing trip they were planning before the baby was due while Bill went back to work on the grill.

He looked around for a moment, at his guests, at his home, and at his little family before him. It felt surreal. He and Gloria had a hundred and one ways to fail but he was certain all of his wife’s bedtime prayers were helpful in that they didn’t. Prayer was the only thing Gloria stuck with, she hadn’t stepped foot in a church since leaving their hometown.

Bill had to admit he felt a well deserving sense of pride when Gloria’s father saw that they were doing more than fine with his own eyes. Suddenly, it hit him that all the time he had taken to help Gloria that she really helped him realize that he too was somebody. She wasn’t just some pastors daughter and he wasn’t just only a greasy Saint boy from Duke Street. He was a hard worker with passions and purpose. Despite the outside worldly ruckus, he knew the world of the 60’s were changing for the better. He could remember a time when he was fearful of change but when he finally let go of that he met Gloria, he left his shitty town, he had a family. Change, as scary as it can seem, allowed room for good. Always.

“Holy shiiiiit,” Ace said loudly, stepping back a bit from Gloria.

She sat on the wicker chair shocked and speechless looking down at her lap. Bill watched fluid drip down her thighs and seep through the gaps of the woven reed. Her wide eyes met his and for a moment they were frozen.

“Bill! Her water broke,” he heard Estella say from behind him. “Get her up you have to go to the hospital!”

“It’s early?” Bill said to Gloria getting her on her feet.

“It-it’s gonna be okay,” Gloria assured for the both of them.

“Go, Bill, I’ve got Jazz. We’ll take care of things here,” Ace said ushering them out. …

Bill paced outside the delivery room for what seemed like forever only it had been hours. The hospital was strict with keeping husbands out of the delivery room, in the ‘60’s it was protocol. The rest of the cookout guests had eventually caught up and they were all in the lounge area waiting, chatting and of course, taking bets over the sex of the baby. Suddenly, Bill stopped dead in his tracks and quickly pressed an ear to the hospital room door and smiled when he heard a baby’s strong cries from within.

Ace spotted that Bill had finally been allowed in the room and then softly whistled to gain everyone’s attention to follow him down the hall. Shortly, the door creaked open and the doctor peeked his head out being able to hear them from inside eager to see the new baby.

“Only one at a time, please,” he said with a curt nod.

Ace scoffed, “you gonna stop us all?” He said pushing the door open allowing Jasper run in through his long legs first and revealing the motley crew behind him. V took over in pushing the doctor out the way so that everyone was able to cram into the delivery room.

“Seriously, Alex,” Bill shook his head amused.

“Shhh,” Gloria said to everyone. She had the tiny healthy baby bundled warmly in a yellow hospital blanket as she rocked them in her arms. “Baby’s sleeping.”

“Alright everyone, take a quick look. Gloria needs some rest too,” Bill said gently taking the baby from Gloria and displaying their little fresh face to everyone. “This is Ruby.”

FIN

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