#or if this is just iso being bored

[caramel1mochi]

One Hazy Winter [Iso x F! Reader] [5]

[ Part 1 / Part 2 / Part 3 / Part 4 / Part 5 ]

Genre: Angst, fluff ‎ 

TW: Heavy depression ‎ ‎ 

Words: 4k ‎ 

Synopsis: One winter before his disappearance, you told your boyfriend Yu about a question you’ve had for so long; one even he could hardly respond to. It took many more hopeless winters for you to finally have your answer.‎ 

Note: Please don't copy or steal my work and pass it off as your own! If you'd like to use one of my headcanons or something, I'd love it if you tagged or asked. SIDENOTE did anyone see how Clove speaks? Who would've thought vehemently studying Irish slang 8 months ago would come back to help me like this??? Writing them is gonna be such a breeze fr hint wink wink nudge nudge nudge

‎

。+❤ฺ·。❤ฺ·。+❤ฺ· +❤·。❤ฺ·。+❤ฺ·

Winter, present day

‎ ‎

You wanted to call yourself stupid for not catching on. How wasn’t it obvious?

There was a gun in his bedroom and a medallion with a symbol that you've never seen before, even after relentlessly googling around. Purple eyes, mysterious disappearances, owning a house with undisclosed memories that he was just willing to abandon for your apartment, and… other than his grandma? Yeah, no family.

You sighed and pushed open the wooden doors to the café, allowing the bell above to announce your arrival on this boring and slow Monday. Yesterday was spent entirely at Yu’s house. Not only to tend to the trees you planted a winter ago, but to also keep searching for that gun. And, alas, there was nothing. Maybe he took it before he disappeared. Maybe he… 

Ugh. 

‎ ‎

You stepped behind the counter and pocketed your headphones. Only now did you hear Ying’s muffled voice way behind you inside her room, drowned out by the music. You were sure that she was speaking to someone on the phone, considering your co-worker called out at the last minute. Who, however, would remain a mystery. Not that you cared.

Then, the door swung open, and you heard the clicks of her shoes as she walked down the corridor, phone in hand.

‎ ‎

“I made sure to check it before I left.” She explained. “Around March, last I heard. That’s the only day– Y/N!”

‎ ‎

Ying’s previously quiet voice shot up a few decibels upon noticing you. But before you even realised it, your mind had prepared itself for the sudden incoming hug it really didn’t want.

‎ ‎

“Oh my God, I was so worried!”

‎ ‎

Her arms found their place tightly wrapped around you, completely ignoring the seemingly important call, as she had tossed her phone on the counter behind her in favour of this embrace. You placed one hand on her back in a weak attempt to reciprocate it. However, all you could notice was how cold her silky black ponytail was as it fell on her back. ‎ ‎

“I missed one day, Ying.”

‎ ‎

“I thought something happened to you!” She pulled away, her hands still on your shoulders. “You should’ve told me– where were you?”

‎ ‎

“At Yu’s.”

‎ ‎

Her posture immediately relaxed with that answer, and a wide grin painted her features.

‎ ‎

“Ah, is that so? And how are the lemons? I trust they’re in excellent condition.”

‎ ‎

You would’ve groaned at how she referred to a bunch of seeds underground as if they were babies being taken care of. But after that tangent, maybe that comparison was… Well, apt wasn’t the word, but, you know. Something like that.

‎ ‎

“Still acclimating. They require less maintenance in the winter, but…” 

‎ ‎

Your words were lodged in your throat, and you were rendered unable to tell her exactly what you were thinking. But Ying somehow didn’t notice. Instead, she began taking a few steps back to close the call she’d abandoned, another idea popping up in her mind.

‎ ‎

“How large was his backyard again? Why don’t you plant more seeds there? Something that can withstand this weather?”

‎ ‎

“When’s the last time you’ve been to his house, Ying?”

‎ ‎

She placed one hand on her hip.

‎ ‎

“I visited Iso’s house a few times before, Y/N. I even recall mentioning the absurd size of his backyard. Ah, I think I used the word ridiculous, too… That might’ve offended him.”

‎ ‎

Ying explained thoughtfully with a finger on her chin. And from her dreamy tone, it was easy for you to infer that she was just about to go off on another tangent should you let her keep talking.

She promptly moved towards the register with this memory in mind. But before she could say anything, you interrupted her.

‎ ‎

“Who’s Iso?”

‎ ‎

…

‎ ‎

“Iso?” 

‎ ‎

Ying stayed silent for a moment. 

Then, she tittered, 

‎ ‎

“I– I must’ve misspoken; I meant to say Yu.”

‎ ‎

You crossed your arms.

‎ ‎

“Who’s Iso, Ying?”

‎ ‎

“Ah, it– it’s just a character from a book I’m currently reading. It’s not anything important.” Ying fanned herself with her hand as she spoke, presumably from a bout of anxiety. “Anywho, as I was saying– would you like me to come along with you? We’ll find new spots for you to plant in!”

‎ ‎

…

You ran your fingers through your hair, leaning on the counter behind you.

Ying only had two Meyer lemons that day, and you managed to scoop out a combined amount of nine seeds. A lot, but compared to a normal lemon that had at least ten–fifteen seeds in one fruit, it was nothing. And what worried you was the prospect of you failing or only managing to get a few trees out of those.

It couldn’t hurt to have a few… backup fruits, right? If the lemons failed, you’d maybe have… something else. Besides, the cashier from that one shop seemed fond of you when you bought the garden ready passion fruit. You could purchase another orange and strike up a conversation with her. Besides, you needed to work on mentally desensitising yourself to being in his house.

‎ ‎

“I'll take care of it myself, I could use some alone time.”

‎ ‎

Even though every second of your life was composed of ‘alone time’ to the point that it was concerning. But Ying didn’t really want to mention that. Not when your mood seemed to be substantially improving with it.

She flashed you her familiar grin in response.

‎ ‎

“Well, if you’d like any help, I’m one–”

‎ ‎

“One text away, got it. Weren’t you talking to someone?”

‎ ‎

You gestured at the phone she set on the counter a while ago, referencing the call she’d abandoned in favour of this conversation. And you swore you could see buffering in her eyes before she caught on.

‎ ‎

“Oh! Right, thank you, I’d almost forgotten about her.”

‎ ‎

She quickly grabbed the phone and waved goodbye before disappearing into her office for the day. And by then, you had already known that customers made their way inside. You didn’t even need to look back to know. Not when that repetitive jingle gave it away, and the sounds of them snickering and gossiping to each other.

You sighed and ran your fingers through your hair, preparing to serve the group.

‎ ‎

❤ฺ·。

‎ ‎

You were still thinking about that gun even after it’d been a whole year since you visited his house. However, when you passed by his bedroom, the thoughts took over your mind like a virus. The urge to peer through his drawers once more grew unbearable, even after you’d done it a few dozen times. And each time, it wouldn’t change; there was simply no gun anymore. This weapon only raised more questions in your mind. None of them were new, except for one:

Was Yu dead? 

Was that the reason for his disappearance? Maybe the hourglass medallion was related to it. Maybe they were a… an organisation? A group, something like that. Maybe he’d gotten into a fight with these people, or maybe they sent someone out to kill him. But why?

You thought of at least a hundred possibilities as to how he would’ve died, but none of it made sense because of one thing, how did someone like Yu get involved with people like this? The only reason you entertained it was because of his eyes, his nonexistent parents, and the bloody house you were in. There’s no way a barista with the same salary as you would be able to buy all of this.

But you never doubted him; you trusted him. You trusted his decision to keep it all vague. You trusted that, one day, he would tell you.

Maybe that was a mistake.

‎ ‎

Oh, screw it, you thought as you pushed the doors to his backyard open. Ignoring the familiar cold sensation that wrapped itself around your exposed face and neck was an easy task, especially when you were finally taking in the sight before you.

Six trees. But you already saw that before. What grabbed your attention were the white flowers scattered around the deep green leaves, like fairies that had sprinkled dust during the night. Once you’d reached it, you meticulously cupped one flower in your gloved hands and observed the shape, but all of it was healthy. All it needed was one more year to finally bear fruit.

The pearly white tint of the flower beautifully stood out against your black gloves; its thin petals curving in a manner so purposeful, you swore it was sculpted by the gods. They also needed pruning, you mused before going back to grab a tool you left behind. But you’d get to it after you watered them.

Incidentally, it was February; Winter was finally coming to an end. And this meant that the snow that coated the ground was starting to melt off, patches of dull grass sneaking through any opening they could in an effort to get some air. This made the shovel you were about to use somewhat redundant when it came to shovelling the snow.

Nevertheless, once you’d picked an empty spot in his spacious backyard, you slid the blade of your shovel under the thin mound of melting snow. Then, once you scooped up most of it, you tossed it aside and cleared the area.

‎ ‎

‘Why do you plant things in the winter? Why not summer?’

‎ ‎

Yu suddenly questioned from behind as he rested on the staircase after he’d done shovelling all of the snow. Since he’d volunteered and successfully done most of the gruelling work for you, you had enough space to finally plant the germinated lemon seeds once you were done spacing them out.

And to him, his inquiry made sense. Winter was the season of death, and even his optimism wouldn’t stop him from admitting that. So why would you pursue a hobby that sprouted life at that time?

You continued shovelling the snow out of the way as you remembered what you told him that dreadful day. And this time, you didn’t block your brain from pulling these annoying conversations from the depths of your mind – not when you wanted to remember the answer.

‎ ‎

‘Planting things in the winter helps them bear fruit faster. Moreover, the seeds I'm planting are winter fruit.’

‎ ‎

Despite sitting behind you, you could easily tell that Yu immediately perked up at the foreign term.

‎ ‎

‘Winter fruit?’

‎ ‎

‘Yes. It's exactly what it sounds like.’

‎ ‎

Whenever he learned something new from you, he would just have the cutest look on his face. If only you could see it now, you mulled. But that privilege was revoked years ago, and you weren’t in the mood to mourn right now. Not after all of your impressive progress so far.

‎ ‎

‘Lemons are a winter fruit?’

‎ ‎

You nodded.

‎ ‎

‘...What about oranges?’

‎ ‎

He noted the abundance of oranges you had at the time, and your silent plans to have them planted, if only it didn’t take years for the blasted trees to bear fruit. This question, however, made you pause at the time.

‎ ‎

‘They... are.’

‎ ‎

‘I see. And why oranges specifically?’

‎ ‎

Seemingly oblivious to the pause in your answer, Yu continued pressing on, unaware of the consequences of asking such a question.

Once the snow was out of the way and you’d cleared the grass, you moved back towards the doors and grabbed the nearby rake, ready to make space for your orange trees.

‎ ‎

‘They were my dad's favourite.’

‎ ‎

The answer came solemnly; the shift in topic immediately souring both his and your mood. And Yu quickly caught on to his mistake since he immediately rushed to apologise,

‎ ‎

‘Oh, I'm- I'm sorry. I didn't mean to…’

‎ ‎

You pushed a plentiful amount of dirt out of the way with only a few repetitive movements. And though they were few, you still felt the sweat form. The thick jacket you wore started to weigh heavily on you. That, and just about everything else, but were you really going to work in a tank top out here?

‎ ‎

‘No, it's okay.’

‎ ‎

Yu watched you stand up once you were done, dusting off your hands. Yet he noted how weak your movements were. How much hesitance was involved in just getting the dirt off of your fingers, or even holding yourself up.

How easily upset you were at the mention of your deceased parents. 

At the time.

‎ ‎

‘Can we leave? I'll... I'll check on the trees afterwards.’

‎ ‎

He immediately stood up and took off his glove to pull you closer to him.

‎ ‎

‘Of course. You deserve a break, after all. Where would you like to go?’

‎ ‎

‘Do you remember the bridge I told you about? I heard it looks better in the spring; but we should go tomorrow.’

‎ ‎

Yu beamed at this, his fingers interlocking with yours, and his thumb had already begun outlining the lines on your palm. It sounded like an innocent suggestion.

‎ ‎

‘Tomorrow? Okay, but you'll have to send me the location in advance.’

‎ ‎

You remembered both of you leaving for the bridge that day and what came afterwards. You remembered the dread that followed you throughout the entire trip. Not to mention the gloom, all because you remembered your father. And it’s not like any of it was to be missed. You didn’t miss having your whole day ruined at the mention of one person.

You stood back and stared at the hole you’d dug with the shovel, measuring its width compared to the tree you were about to put in its place.

Perfect, you thought. It was all perfect.

‎ ‎

❤ฺ·。

‎ ‎

Summer passed by like a breeze, and Ying was beyond delighted at the harvest you brought back and immediately got to work with the others to turn them into delicious treats to sell. Luckily for you (or her), they sold like hotcakes, and today, once winter finally arrived, the moment you walked through the doors and heard the jingle from above, you already saw the results of your hard work.

Ying stood deep within the dining area in front of the wall that used to be empty for so long; now, however, it carried the large, expensive painting she had yearned for the past few years. And just like she predicted, it looked absolutely stunning. The colours perfectly complemented the warm colour palette of the general area, and the ladies and their surroundings bounced off of the previously dull flora she’d decorated the area with. That, and, you know, it was just a pretty painting to look at.

You approached and pocketed your headphones, but Ying needn’t look back to know you were there. The crunch of the ice under your boots was loud enough. All thanks to the strong snowfall outside.

‎ ‎

“Isn’t this amazing? It feels like I renovated the whole area, Y/N!”

‎ ‎

She said excitedly as she clasped her hands together, meeting your gaze. Did you even want to ask how long she spent staring at the painting? Not that it was a bad thing.

‎ ‎

“I admit. It does look impressive.”

‎ ‎

“And I couldn’t have done it without you! Speaking of which, you look happy today. Did something happen?”

‎ ‎

Ying asked with a tilt of her head, and your smile only widened at this despite your futile attempts to keep a straight face.

‎ ‎

“The lady at the nursery suggested I sell some of my plants there with her. I’m still considering it.”

‎ ‎

She didn’t know who she was, so you didn’t really bother telling Ying the name of this new friend you made. But her face still beamed at this.

‎ ‎

“Why not? You mentioned your apartment being cramped a while ago. Is that still the case?”

‎ ‎

“It is.”

‎ ‎

Of course she’d remember an off-handed comment from months ago. Besides, all anyone needed to know something like this was to simply glance at any of your windows, and they’d see the potted trees pressed up against them.

‎ ‎

“I’ll still have to wait until the weather clears up.”

‎ ‎

“I see. Good call.”

‎ ‎

She didn’t need to look out the windows to see the thick fog outside. The way to work was difficult enough for her since she had to avoid the black ice and check the weather for any potential storms. Nevertheless, despite how subtle it was, Ying immediately picked up on the wistfulness that bled into your previously content tone.

‎ ‎

“Is… something wrong?”

‎ ‎

Your smile slowly fell as you carefully leaned on the table behind you.

Don’t quote me on this comparison, I hate Chemistry. But despite solitude being bound to you like protons to a nucleus at this point, and vice versa, you’d been keeping this question to yourself, and it felt like it was driving you mad. For once, you needed to ask someone, and who better than Ying? And you weren’t in the mood to be subtle or to ease her into it. 

Might as well lay it all out.

‎ ‎

“Is Yu dead?”

‎ ‎

She seemed incredibly caught off guard by the question.

‎ ‎

“Dead? That– that’s a… ah, a bold assumption… Why would you ever say that?”

‎ ‎

Should you even tell her about the gun and the hourglass medallion? Even though you were still pissed at Yu for keeping so many things hidden from you, you still felt it disrespectful to air out his laundry behind his back. Well, if he was alive, that is.

Besides, it’s not like she was innocent either. She had a mysteriously large sum of money herself, despite being a humble café owner. Speaking of… why didn’t she just buy the painting with that instead of waiting for your harvest? Maybe you shouldn’t ask everything.

You sighed and ran your fingers through your hair.

‎ ‎

“Just a thought.”

‎ ‎

“No, don’t say that. You’re doing so well, Y/N; don’t let the pessimism get to you!”

‎ ‎

You smiled in amusement at her words. Was the change in your appearance and attitude that drastic? You could’ve sworn one of the positive things about your genes was the lack of dark circles under your eyes. Ying, however, only kept going.

‎ ‎

“How about we visit his grandmother? I know both of you used to do that a lot. Are those lemons done growing?”

‎ ‎

“They are. I should be able to harvest them on Sunday if the weather gets better.”

‎ ‎

It’s been a while since you visited her. And honestly, you may or may not have missed her delighted smile and hug whenever she’d see you come in with freshly baked goods for her to enjoy. Shame this all stopped when Yu disappeared. If you took it this horribly, you couldn’t even imagine what she was going through.

‎ ‎

“Sunday? That’s great! Would you like me to come with you? I’ll bring the baskets!”

‎ ‎

For once, the offer sounded enticing. Hauling baskets around in a bus also sounded like a terrible idea. So… 

You nodded.

‎ ‎

“I don’t mind.”

‎ ‎

“Wonderful! So, what do you always bring her? Was it lemon bars, or…”

‎ ‎

Ying started spitballing ideas as she walked you to the counter, attempting to come up with a list of lemon desserts for you both to bring. Sweets and baking weren’t her forte, but it was really fun to watch her ramble on about something she really enjoyed. It wasn’t that hard to tell that she never got to have a casual conversation with someone outside of work, anyway.

And so you let her talk, instead opting to listen to her in silence and only chiming in when she was out of words.

‎ ‎

❤ฺ·。

‎ ‎

Both of you settled on lemon pie. It was a nice change compared to the usual pound cakes you’d always bring her. And besides, you needed to bring something special after not visiting her for years, or however long it’s been. Not like you were one to keep track of time.

Nevertheless, a week had passed since that conversation, and things only continued to improve. Mentally, that is.

You were way too exhausted from tending to what felt like a few hundred trees all day. The work felt like it was never ending. It’s not like you were able to go outside anyway; the fog never let up since then. Even the buses were starting to reroute, and your path to work was getting more and more hazy.

Thankfully for you, it was Saturday; you’ve been up since the crack of dawn, and you’ve just finished your housework at two in the afternoon. Pruning, fertilising, watering and fending off fungal infections and diseases. Even though it was winter, an abundance of dormant plants still equaled a considerable amount of work. Sure, as Ying said, the air was fresher in here, but you needed to sell all of these plants. It was quite literally a forest at this point. That wasn’t to mention the ones at Yu’s house that you still haven’t tended to, the ones you were going to harvest tomorrow had the weather improved.

Once you set down your shears and gave your fingers the relief of rest after spending the past hour pruning your kiwi tree, it felt like they were just one wrong move away from falling off your body. And maybe that was the time for you to actually stop working.

‎ ‎

You walked back inside to your hotter bedroom and slammed the door to the balcony shut, taking a deep breath of the fresh air to isolate a specific scent. And it didn’t take long for you to spot it – the scent of hot chocolate. You’d just made it for breakfast and had completely forgotten about it whilst waiting for it to cool off.

Huh. Instead of drinking it in bed, maybe you should try something Ying would probably do.

You ran your stiff fingers through your hair and moved towards the kitchen, grabbed the lukewarm cup and headed for the living room. Once you sat down on the couch, the remote immediately made its way into your hand and the television was turned on. Yu’s blankets were still there. You washed and tossed them back there, since there was no reason for you to move them. Not like you felt ill when you looked at them. They were pretty warm. 

Besides, you were more concerned with the television and whether or not it would work after being unused for so long.

And… Yeah. It was kind of boring. Scratch that; it was very boring. Ying was probably just way too old-fashioned for you.

You surfed through the channels for a few more minutes. And with every channel you passed, you were only further reminded as to why this blasted thing was never used. You surfed and surfed and surfed, eventually landing on whatever channel it was once you’d gotten bored enough and instead picked up the phone to scroll through social media. Maybe you really should hit up your landlord and stop funding this useless thing mounted on your wall, you mused.

Your train of thought, however, was immediately derailed once your ringtone blasted in your ears. Ying had suddenly called you. And despite your annoyance, you accepted it without thought, holding the phone up to your ear.

‎ ‎

“Y/N! Good afternoon, how are you?”

‎ ‎

“Hi. Do you need something?” 

‎ ‎

She tittered, and you could feel her anxiously fan herself from the other side of the phone.

‎ ‎

“What if I just wanted to check in on my friend?”

‎ ‎

“So you… don’t need anything.”

‎ ‎

“No, I do. Are you free this March?”

‎ ‎

You sighed and instead looked out the window, your eyes locking on the rapid snowfall that only helped further coat the ground in tonnes of snow. Sidewalks, houses, dead trees, balconies… Well, the uncovered ones, of course. Your balcony was safe.

‎ ‎

“Possibly. Why?”

‎ ‎

This question was weird to ask, to say the least. Especially to someone who lived their life with no planning and went with the flow. But you did understand why she’d ask since she planned months and months ahead.

‎ ‎

“There’s something I must do, but it’s highly likely that I’d end up needing your assistance with it. Do you recall a few years ago, when you…”

‎ ‎

Then, the word ‘storm’ caught your attention, your eyes immediately darted back to the television as your brain tuned out Ying’s words. Turns out that the channel you’d stopped at was the weather forecast, and the woman was explaining an incoming catastrophic storm headed towards…

Crap. 

‎ ‎

“I– I have to go; I need to leave.”

‎ ‎

“Where? What’s happening?” 

‎ ‎

Without thought, you stood up and rushed towards the thick jacket you had hung up on the coat rack right next to the door.

‎ ‎

“Ying, there’s a blizzard. It’s headed right around the neighbourhood where Yu’s house is!”

‎ ‎

You slipped on your boots and grabbed your keys, stuffing whatever remaining essentials there were in your pocket.

‎ ‎

“What?! Y/N, wait, don’t tell me you’re–”

‎ ‎

“I’m going, Ying!”

‎ ‎

“Don’t! Don’t, just wait for me, I–”

‎ ‎

You slammed the door shut, haphazardly holding the scarf over your nose, and rushed down the flight of stairs.

‎ ‎

Ying failed to convince you not to go before you closed the phone and shifted all of your focus back on your path, and she especially failed to get you to understand what was truly happening through your skull. To her, you either didn’t notice the magnitude of the situation, or you just outright didn’t care. Rushing into a blizzard just to keep a few trees safe was something no sane person would do, even with how much those trees meant to you.

And despite the thick haze that blocked you from seeing only a few feet in front of you, the people rushing to get home as soon as possible, and the rapid snowfall, none of it mattered. You clutched the ice-cold pole inside the bus and leaned your head against it, its temperature seeping through your thick black gloves and stinging your skin.

Your eyes locked on the windows as you watched the driver struggle to make his way through the fog, and your heart raced fast enough that it nearly constituted a heart attack. People around you were scared. The children huddled with their parents like scared birds, and you swore you could hear a few of them reassure their kids that they were going to make it home just fine. But you tuned it all out in favour of what was important to you.

All you needed to do was get to his house. Get to his house at the very least, and it’ll all be okay. 

Those trees will be okay. You’ll make sure of it.

[sir-adamus]

the lore behind Space Paranoids in Kingdom Hearts 2 is so funny to me

because it's not 'the KH-verse version of the Grid', it is, in-universe, a direct copy of ENCOM's system, and presumably a direct copy taken before the events of TRON (given the presence of Sark and the MCP)

Ansem the Wise went out into the cosmos, found the most boring world (because all the interesting stuff happening there was happening inside the computer system, and he was unaware of that), and stole their computer system without really understanding how it works and installed it in Radiant Garden

meanwhile that world spins on, the events of the TRON movies play out, Flynn developing the Grid, the spontaneous evolution of the ISOs, Clu 2.0 flipping his shit and taking over, all that - this world does have a sleeping version of itself (which isn't necessarily an indication that it fell to darkness like a lot of the others, as Traverse Town didn't), which Riku and Sora pass through on their Mark of Mastery exam and get to live through the events of Legacy (though because this happens in the Sleeping World version of the Grid, and not the real one, in that world the events of Legacy play out pretty much how they did in the movie with no interference)

like all the interesting stuff is happening inside the technology of this world (and in the context of Kingdom Hearts's lore, Programs being alive and having emotions is a key plot point, especially for DDD, playing into the key theme of how beings of artificial origins can still become 'real'. shame they didn't explore the absolute lore bomb ISOs like Quorra would bring to the table, given they weren't created but just sprang into existence in the Grid), but on the surface (and presumably how you'd access it in the world map), this is just a regular world filled with office buildings and houses and corporate espionage

so its canonical - if unseen - existence in Kingdom Hearts's whimsical cosmology is funny as hell

[shadythetortie]

Disclaimer: dog arrested during surgery, dog is fine, she went home, but I need to get this out of my head and into writing somewhere. I have restarted this post over ten times.

I will have been an RVT for 5 years as of May 14. It feels longer. It feels like I have been here for decades. Sometimes I think that it feels a bit like I've seen everything. I was humbled very quickly from this thought on Tuesday.

The very first patient of the year. Routine spay. 6 month old Frenchie. Absolute sweetheart of a dog. Squirmy for her bloodwork because she kept trying to kiss everyone. Bloodwork was completely normal. No heart murmur. No abnormalities. No issues after premed. Not a single problem until my vet lifted the first ovary, and thats when her heart stopped.

That's never happened to me before.

I've seen it happen before, but it was not my patient. I've had other animals arrest on me but they've mostly been things like hit by cars or other emergencies. I have never in my career had a completely routine, apparently healthy animal die on the table while it was in my care. Technically, yes, she died. Her heart stopped, her lungs stopped, and she died.

And y'know its kind of a blur for a bit. The vet starts pumping her chest, I turn off anesthetic and another tech grabs epinephrine and gives that. We did get her heart started again after a minute or so, but the rest of the surgery was a very stressful time of delicately playing 'how much iso can i give this dog so that she stays under but doesn't die?' And I was stressed, but in an emergency you kind of just stay cool and do your job. Panic doesn't help you. All you can do while the doctor tries to finish surgery as fast as possible is two things: make sure the dog gets oxygen, and make sure her heart keeps going.

She ended up recovering well. She didn't know any better. Back to being a big baby and giving kisses as soon as she could. Went home to a very worried owner and did just fine.

I thought I was fine too until we got out of surgery and my body got out of emergency mode. Thats when it hits you, that's when you realize what just happened and that is when you break. But I cant just shut down when I still have two other surgeries to do, so I had a second to cry and then back we went.

I have been a vet tech for almost five years, and that is the first time I have ever had an otherwise healthy animal die during surgery. After all of the other patients I've lost, after everything else I have seen, I didnt think it would affect me this much. I have had way worse cases. I have seen trauma, and abuse, and extremely horrific injuries and cases and things that to this day I dread seeing again. But this is so different. When you dont expect it, its so much worse.

95% of anesthesia is boring as hell. That other 5% will traumatize you for the rest of your career.

Never assume you've seen it all. The universe will prove you very wrong.

[pxrxcxa]

why did you start writing? like just for fun or were you bored😭

Hahaha! I’ve always enjoyed writing, but I joined tumblr when I got covid + tonsillitis back in June. It also happened to be when Joseph Quinn broke the internet and my obsession started

So I started getting into reading fan fic about Eddie, buttttt I couldn’t find more of what I enjoyed or I was just reading repetitive fics so I decide to write my own 😂 it was really just for me and my own enjoyment but people seemed to like my writing 🤷🏼‍♀️🥺 so thus my blog was born and I became a menace on society

But yeah it was a mixture of both, being bored in iso and writing for my own enjoyment 💗

[trimac7]

The Most Important Guide to Picking the Best Flanges Manufacturer

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These are Some Best Types of Flanges

Flanges are essential components in various industrial and mechanical systems. They play a crucial role in connecting pipes, valves, and other equipment while providing structural support and sealing.

Weld Neck Flanges: One of the most popular forms, weld neck flanges are renowned for their high-strength construction. They are welded to the pipe and feature a long, tapered neck that offers great structural support and stress distribution. In high-pressure and high-temperature applications, such as the oil and gas industry, the flange's circular shape and smooth transition from the neck to the pipe aid decrease turbulence and erosion.

Slip-On Flanges: In low-pressure applications, slip-on flanges are frequently utilized because they are simple to install. They are made to slide over the end of the pipe and have a diameter that is just a little bit larger. After being put in position, they are kept in place by welding the perimeter. These flanges are affordable and appropriate for systems that do not need significant structural integrity.

Blind Flanges: When repair or inspection are necessary, blind flanges are utilized to close off the end of a pipe system. They are solid discs without a bore, usually fastened in place by bolts. When working on pipelines or boats, blind flanges are crucial for stopping leaks and guaranteeing worker safety.

Threaded Flanges: The internal bore of threaded flanges has threads, enabling them to be screwed into pipes having complementary external threads. In low-pressure and low-temperature applications, they are frequently utilized. For systems that need routine maintenance, threaded flanges offer a secure connection and are simple to install and disassemble.

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The Key Factors to Consider When Choosing the Right Flanges Manufacturer

Quality Assurance and Certification: The commitment to quality and adherence to industry standards is the most important factor to take into account when choosing a flange manufacturer. Make that the manufacturer has the appropriate certifications to create flanges that adhere to international standards like ASME, ANSI, API, or ISO. Find certifications that attest to a dedication to quality management systems, such as ISO 9001:2015.

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Product Range: Flanges of various varieties, including welding neck, slip-on, socket weld, and blind flanges, are needed for various tasks. To satisfy your unique requirements, confirm that the manufacturer offers a wide variety of flange types, sizes, and pressure classes. Another benefit is the ability to customize flanges to meet your specific needs.

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Customer Reviews and References: Examine the reputation of the manufacturer by reading customer feedback. Additionally, to learn more about prior clients' opinions of the manufacturer's goods and services, get references and chat with them directly.

Conclusion

The success and safety of your projects might be affected by your choice of flange dimensions, which is a crucial decision. You can make an informed decision that protects the dependability and lifespan of your plumbing systems by carefully weighing criteria like quality, material selection, technological prowess, and customer service. When picking flanges, keep in mind that reliability and quality should always take precedence above price because the long-term effects of selecting inferior products can be expensive and dangerous.

[govindhtech]

Elevate Your Gaming: AKKO Gear 5075B Keyboard Experience

Review of the AKKO Gear 5075B 75% Wireless Keyboard: Cheap custom keyboard with ISO-DE layout or boring GMMK Pro clone?

He was first dubious when the manufacturer, AKKO Gear, came me and gave me their most recent movement in ISO-DE layout. Surely a Chinese Glorious GMMK Pro? he eventually decided to take the test after carefully reading the specifications. You may read about the 5075B’s capabilities in the test!

We didn’t always have positive experiences when a Chinese manufacturer offered us their most recent products in the past. Yes, there were always standouts, such as Soundpeats, a company we had never heard of that offers good products for not too much money.

Of course, there are also black sheep and blenders, which we enjoy letting run up in public at Igor’s LAB as well. But he says sorry to disappoint you if you were anticipating a formal review.

After some initial scepticism, the keyboard proved to be a very good input device and even provided certain bespoke features that were sometimes lacking in other keyboards (even much more expensive mainstream variants), which are frequently used by our readers.

Although the custom scene is well-versed in terms like gasket mounted and PBT keycaps, the majority of “normals” have typically grown disinterested in such subjects long ago. Even though he still a novice in the wonderful world of custom keyboards, he eagerly looking forward to the time when the lightbulb will finally go off.

Custom keyboards are pricey, which is their one and only drawback. It costs here times 30 euros for a cable, there times 80 euros for a set of keycaps, and look, there are also carrier plates made of different materials and frames with various colours a vicious cycle that frequently results in a finished keyboard costing at least 500 euros. Because they often have a smaller form factor (TKL or smaller), these custom boards have fortunately not yet been able to pique my interest.

The 5075B can almost be utilised in productive use without any issues thanks to arrow keys and a real DE layout with a respectable Enter key, but he don’t want to jump ahead and remove the device from its packing just yet.

Unboxing

Although the packaging is basic in black and white, it manages to attract the eye.

Even if the back is primarily written in Chinese, you can still make out the DE layout and the switches that are present.

Under the slider is a black cardboard box with a reflective logo.

Everyone uses the same style of packaging, though, with the keyboard being enclosed in a protective foil and given a dust cover. He don’t remember ever putting this clear cover on my keyboard while it wasn’t in use, so you might as well throw this piece of plastic junk away.

The problem is this! Quite straightforward in white, without any frills a keyboard for adults?

On the back, there is nothing but white ABS plastic. We’ll get to the folding feet and other components right away, but all four corners have soft rubber feet with excellent grip.

Given that the toggle switch can only switch between the shortcuts for MAC OS and Windows, 2-way would have likely sufficed. he don’t see how the centre position is different from the “Win” position.

A direct USB 2.4 GHz receiver is also included on the board.

In two steps, the back foot can be extended. Sorry about the dust, but after a few hours of use, the photographs on the SD card became corrupted and had to be retaken.

On the sides are subtle light strips, and of course the entire lighting system may be turned off altogether.

The USB-C port for lag-free connectivity and charging the 3000mAh battery that is permanently installed is still located at the back. The cable fits okay, but it’s also not completely secure.

Although the PBT double-shot keycaps are a little flatter than the standard Cherry MX keycaps, they are of excellent quality.

Keycaps taken off:

The volume is often controlled by the rotating knob with an aluminium case in the upper right corner. However, hitting the switch changes its functionality instead of muting the system, as he had anticipated, allowing the brightness of the illumination to be adjusted instead of the volume.

The offered model comes pre-configured with linear Akko Creamy Yellow Switches.

The switches can be replaced even while the system is operating because the board is hot-swappable. It accommodates all 3- and 5-pin switches.

He will cover the “gasket-mounted” plastic carrier plate in a subsequent paragraph. The fact that the LEDs are “south-facing” implies that additional switches are compatible with them. Since most keycaps he seen so far are designed for “north-facing” LEDs and the illumination of the letters on the Akko is dim as a result, it’s not exactly ideal for the illumination of translucent keycaps.

Additionally, the LEDs may shine a chilly white rather than a powerful blue depending on the switches that are in use. But he address that as well later.

The “stabilisers” for the huge keys, however, are quite well done. The huge space bar always moves uniformly and smoothly regardless of where you press it.

The stabilisers, however, reportedly do not come from the factory lubricated.

Additionally, there are accessories. A USB-C cable, some silicone mounts for the gasket mounting system, keycap and switch pullers, replacement keys0 a USB-C cable, and a large number of alternative keys that are also PBT double shot and not cheap printed keys are also included.

Akko also included a full set of the tactile Creamy Blue Switches, an alternative option, for comparison, which we will install and test later.

[jj0408]

Diary 08.20.2023

I quit being a pessimist, so I don’t have much to complain about this time. I’ve realized that I’m more introverted than I would like to be— so I’m always acting like I’m not (introverted) in an attempt to force myself to be the kind of person I want to be. I love to force things but it leaves everyone around me irritated and me dissatisfied so I’m working on a more intuitive approach. Clap IF you care.

E. came back from Iceland. We went to the ICP together and saw that exhibition on love. I love Nobuyoshi more than anyone else in the world… the work they had on display was incredible too. I wish they’d had more, though. Screw all other photographers, it’s you that I purple Araki-oppa! Saranghaja! Saranghae!

I liked Hervé Guibert, Leigh Ledare and Motoyuki Daifu. And RongRong&inri, of course, but that was a given. I didn’t care for Sally Mann (never have) or (controversially) Clifford Prince King. I was sorely disappointed by No. 223 because I usually like him but this time felt bored and unaffected by the pictures shown. Everything else I was either negatively indifferent or fine about.

Walking past the Nan Goldin display was a trip in itself; the entire time in the exhibition (very, VERY close behind me), followed some kind of photographic hobbyist (who I would assume takes pictures only of the cityscape at night, if the desperately grown mustache was anything to go by). The whole time he was explaining (mansplaining?) The Great Art Of Photography to the girl with him… You just turn up the ISO for this effect. “Oh yeah, film’s an expensive hobby, but it just feels so Natural and real to me, you know? Can’t put an Instagram filter on 35mm…” etc. It was really so so sad.

But, passing by Madame Goldin’s work, I watched as all three of the litter stopped, stared, and then moved through the photo series in confusion: once behind me, our lens aficionado says, unashamed and at speaking volume in a quiet room, to his friend:

“I don’t get it though, does she know these people or…?” (Resulting response: One shrug, one “I don’t know”.)

I will admit, Reader, that in a moment of cruelhearted weakness did I let a laugh escape… oh well. One thousand Shame On You’s and damn me for all eternity.

Something I’m noticing with increasing frequency is the Identity Theme Artist Statement. New Age (identity) vs. Old Age (intimacy). When did we stop doing photography projects about other people, anyway? Why’s every single work about the self and one’s view of the self and life as the Kweer Nonbinary Disabled Colorado Resident Self? Who cares? What about Love? Bah Humbug.

Well anyway, I think as a culture we forgot that Identity does not necessarily equal Narrative. I DON’T care if you’re Kweer and Nonbinary and Disabled in Colorado. When that’s the whole project it’s so lackluster and sad. Those things would naturally present themselves if you did any project on yourself, wouldn’t they? Why make them the driving focus when you could focus on something so much more poignant or beautiful? I’d go into more detail about this but I’ve forgotten what I was going to say.

Photographs from the show below.

I’ve realized, (once again, ha ha ha) that I do, in fact, like Photography as a medium. Maybe not enough to pursue being a (Photographer), but enough to at least give (Photography Projects) another shot. (Ha ha.) Broke out the camera today… I think I need to shoot a project with a bullshit theme that I can be proud of. I’d forgotten that you don’t have to take pictures of things that you don’t want to. My phone is out of storage. I wish I was a boy emperor.

Looking Forward!

[kiawintersalesevent]

.

[demonfox38]

Okay. Made it through the last season of Netflix's "Castlevania" interpretation. Thoughts are below the cut.

I've often thought of this series as the exploitation version of "Castlevania," and hiring Malcom McDowell confirms that.

Although, I find it hilarious that both Malcolm McDowell and Patrick Stewart have ended up voicing the same character. I'm sure there's a "Star Trek Generations" joke to be made in there, but I'm not Mike Stoklasa.

Also, I was cracking up a bit when Varney's plot twist happened. Mostly, because it came off a bit Skeletor-esque in vocal performance.

Also, also—laughing that the final boss went the "Castlevania: Lament of Innocence" route despite barely touching on that game's plot.

Animation had its ups and downs with this season. It seemed like there were some frame issues (not enough inbetweening.) I do appreciate how they incorporated more of Alucard's SOTN animations into his fights, however.

Additionally, some of the fight scenes' pacing seemed to have issues, particularly regarding weapon recovery.

The whole bit with St. Germain was off. Like, he's a weird asshole in "Castlevania: Curse of Darkness", but he's more of a weird asshole there in the same way that casually encountering "Doctor Who"'s Doctor would also be strange. Not a straight up villainous boob. Kinda makes sense thematically to have another character who is willing to do horrible shit for their lost loved one, but the series honestly did not do a good job establishing her. Like, did she even have a voice actor? Or a name? All I'm saying is it was much easier for outsiders to get the Lisa revenge thing Dracula had going.

Also, how dare you joke about not being deaf and then have a villainous monologue, TV show.

Greta's a good girl. Well, outside of being an occasional homewrecker. Point is, she's competent and trying her best to save people in a bad situation, and anyone having issues with her is not to be trusted in the same way that you don't trust people who don't like Rochelle from "Left 4 Dead 2."

Look at me. Do not trust people who do not like Rochelle from "Left 4 Dead 2." Yes, her writing could have been better, but she's still a viable character. Let people Thunder Child their ships on the rocks of your better self. Got me?

Also, y'all really need to embrace more polyamory. Or understand the fact that Alucard's not going to love just one person in his life. Dude lives to be at least 600 in the game's timeline. For a dude who loves humans, constricting him to just one who may live to be 100 at best is cruel.

There are some interesting philosophical dialogues going on here, but I can see where some people may lose their patience for them. Considering one of Castlevania's most popular memes is a philosophy debate, you're just gonna have to suck that up. My personal favorites included the topic of acting versus reacting, as well as having agency in one's story.

Striga's battle theme was cool, but otherwise, the music was forgettable. Yes, that is a sin. Punishable by Death? In this series, maybe!

The gore's still over the top. Which, okay, fine. There's a bit of that in game. It's just generally a bit more reserved with it or uses it in crucial boss fights.

RIP doggie.

The Targoviste plot's a bit of a wash, but it doesn't feel as useless as Trevor and Sypha's previous plot predicament. It's just nothing of a surprise, considering how many times the writing has played the "authority figures are useless" and "dark secret surprise" tropes in this series. Like, Greta being reliable is actually more surprising than anything with this plot.

I cannot emphasize enough how boring I found Carmilla's interpretation and plot arc. You guys could have had a giant, naked lesbian riding a skull and spewing magic at people while her cat-eared girlfriend jumped them for extra damage. But no. Vanilla lady with a scarlet sword for you. So long. Farewell. Auf Wiedersehen. Good night.  

Gotta say, as much of a deviation from his source character as he is, Isaac really turned out well in this series. He's definitely evidence that you don't always need to stick to source material.

His Abel is fucking sick, dude. Way to go, king.

Also, I was expecting more violence from Hector this season. Oh, well. At least he got a teeny bit of a spine.

Look. I'm not an alchemist by any means. I'm just a bit baffled by this season's emphasis of obtaining a Rebis. Like, any time the game series has talked about the Magnum Opus of Alchemy, it's more been in pursuit of making a Philosopher's Stone (or at the very least, a Crimson Stone, as seen in "Castlevania: Lament of Innocence.") Pulling a Rebis out of the aether is…well. Could have been more interesting than it was. I mean, it was a bit nightmarish, but it really didn't do much.

Sypha's really never getting back to her family, is she?

Love the idea that the cross subweapon is basically a fancy chakram.

GERGOTH. BUDDY. FRIENDO.

Really appreciating the monster variety in these last two seasons. I mean, that's a big selling point of the "Castlevania" games. Not so much vampires standing around and bickering in dick-waving contests.

Breaking out of the bullet points to hit on the big subject of this season—that is, the ending being surprisingly happy.

There's been a lot of shit that's happened over the last few years. Obviously, a pandemic. Konami's run by pricks. Then, there's the situation with the allegations of sexual coercion with Warren Ellis. Additionally, the terrible ending of "Game of Thrones" likely impacted how this season was developed, considering it seemed to be chasing its progression in construction. (I mean, look at Carmilla and Daenerys.) I don't know how many people were happy with the last season of "Castlevania," but from my POV, it double-tapped itself in the foot with the way it pushed simultaneous sex and violence in its last two episodes. My point is, there was little taste for additional darkness, considering everything that has been happening. Society is drained.

A happy ending was what people really wanted. And man, did this pull through, in that regard. But, there's a conversation to be had in if this swerved too far or if it violates some artistic integrity to give people what they want. So, let's have it.

Look. Man. Have you seen a "Castlevania" ending? When you do it right, it's crumbled castles and rainbow-colored skies. If you do it really right, it results in a pretty girl holding the main character's hand. There is happiness in these games. Hope. Forgiveness and redemption. If this is supposed to be any bit an accurate interpretation of these games, it absolutely should end in such a joyful fashion. (Okay, maybe giving Dracula and Lisa a second honeymoon at the end was a bit much, but I get where people would want that.)

Did some items need to be addressed more? Absolutely. Alucard staking people and Hector getting sexually coerced into servitude are some pretty big topics to just wave away. (Oh, shit. That second part is even worse now with what Ellis was allegedly doing, isn't it?) I suppose I'm just glad the series didn't go full Sephiroth with Alucard. And at least Hector finally took some stand in his situation, even if it wasn't the bombastic, hateful revenge I'm used to seeing from this character in other stories.

I think the creators of this series were trying to save this show from the fate of "Game of Thrones." (To some extent, perhaps the "Voltron" re-interpretation as well.) There's so much media out there anymore that if a production team doesn't nail the ending, their creation gets wiped out of the collective consciousness. To that extent, I think the creators were successful in saving their series. Did it do damage to itself in yanking out of its construction and themes? A bit. But, in doing so, it pivoted back to being more like a proper "Castlevania" product. (And of course, by proper, I mean anything ignoring "Lords of Shadows." God, people need to stop chasing other products when developing "Castlevania" stuff and just let the series be as it is.)

I am very curious as to how much of this season was part of an original draft and how much was revised in backlash to everything that has happened. It doesn't seem like Trevor was intended to survive, but to some extent, Sypha had to. (I mean, until she has a kid, anyway. See "Lords of Shadows" series for dickery regarding that.) I'm also wondering if there was more intended for the Carmilla subplot, as much as the series was banging on about her invading locations. I'm not even sure St. Germain was intended to be a villain all along. Getting into a bitchfight with Death? Sure. Doing what he did here? That's a weird arc, dude.

If you come away from my POV with anything, it should be this: GO PLAY THE GAMES.

Do it. Do it, you ghouls. Go to the Steam store and download the "Castlevania Anniversary Collection." Boot up your PS3 or 4 or 18 or whatever and get "Symphony of the Night." Throttle Nintendo's stores until "Aria of Sorrow" or "Dawn of Sorrow" or "Harmony of Dissonance" or whatever rattles out of their moldy pockets. Find a ROM. Find an ISO. Just play a game. Especially, one of the ones made before 2010.

"Castlevania" as a game series isn't about hordes of vampires dick-waving at each other or edgy swearing or being grim and dark. Some of that stuff's there, sure. But, at its core, it's what game developers created when they looked at Universal Monster Movie creations and went "That's cool. Let's fight that!" It's a series about pushing technology in MMC chips to make rich, vibrant music. It's about flourishing artwork and layers of sprites dripping particles and gore onto players. It's sober and goofy and very pro curry.

The thing is, "Castlevania" players have their own unique connection to the series. We're the weirdos you see clapping their hands when a mutilated dinosaur shows up on screen. It's not because the monster alone is cool. It's that we've fought and struggled and bodied that thing through several floors like a goddamn "X-Men: Children of the Atom" stage. It's kicked our asses. We've kicked its ass. We've got a connection to it that you just don't get from passively watching it barf lasers through a computer monitor or TV screen. Like, you know how people go, "Well, the movie wasn't as good as the book?" It's obnoxious, sure. But, those who read the source materials have to go to the effort of constructing their own sets and people to understand what's happening. In a similar fashion, game players build up their own skill set to reach that next rung.

Maybe you don't always get a payout when you invest your resources into something. But, there is a sense of accomplishment, seeing what you can do.

There's a reason this series got an adaptation. I mean, outside of Konami's head executives wanting easy money. "Castlevania" is a fantastic video game series. Has it got a few problems? Oh yeah. Especially after outsourcing and pachislot machines became all the rage. But, there's a reason Simon and Richter Belmont are playable in "Super Smash Bros. Ultimate." There's a reason I spent a significant amount of time playing these games and writing or drawing fanworks for it. These games are wonderful. Beautiful. Difficult, but inspiring. Reasons I will still bang on about them decades years down the road.

When I get exasperated by layers of angst and edge lord content this Netflix series generated, I want you to know why. The roots of this show are good games held captive under poor management. Some people on staff know this. I wish they had more scenario and writing control. But mostly, I don't want to shit on them or their work. (Well, other than perhaps the obvious target.) I just want you to see what I love in these games.

And also to watch Crashervania. Because that's legit.

[judelaw]

a. other than english, what other languages can you speak?

b. share with us some of your favourite sayings/quotes that Jude has said?

c. what's your last favourite film of Jude and least favourite performance? mine happens to be love, honour and obey...sorry :(

a.

German (my native language)

very, very, very basic French and Spanish (like enough to get around on a vacation but not enough to hold a conversation)

Icelandic (I just started learning it this month though but I’m doing quite good so far)

Once I’m somewhat fluent in Icelandic I want to start learning sign language since I’m slowly on my way to lose my hearing so that could be quite useful lmao

b.

in no specific order:

“What I realised […] was the most crucial thing I could ever have learnt, which is that fear is a good thing. And the reason it’s a good thing is because there is only one way out of it, and that is to work harder, commit more, and believe in what you’re doing. The fear comes from having been kicked about a bit. Which means, of course, that that kicking hasn’t been for nothing. That actually, it’s been a good thing. And that, in turn, makes it much easier to bear.”

“[…] I believe that imagination, whether on page or on screen, has the power to heal and transform lives. It can inspire hope and spread goodwill. Indeed, if there’s one thing I’ve learned from playing Dumbledore, it’s that compassion is greater than any one spell. In the end, we don’t need magic to stand together for what’s right (though it certainly helps).“

“I think to me, on an absolutely personal level, peace to me means the opportunity to be oneself and to live the way one wants to live; considering others but being free to be who you are.” 

“I remember putting on plays as a class, with the teacher obviously directing, and just thinking this didn’t feel like class, this felt like play. And it felt easy, it felt comfortable - I felt at home.”

“I certainly sometimes weighed up what I was getting out of the job with the hassle and the grief that I was being caused at home. And what I took from that was, “Well, I’d better start making better choices at work”. Because I didn’t want to give it up. I thought, “Well, if I’m considering stopping, then it means the work’s not worth it, so the work should become worth it”.

c.

This is iso hard to answer as there are films/shows I dislike and films/shows I simply don’t care about and I don’t know what the greater offence is lmao I’d probably go with Neo Yokio. I love myself some Jude Law voice acting but the entire thing was so boring that I constantly forget it even exists.

[mewtwowarrior]

I think I’ve finalized Ark’s backstory. I did a little editing to the previous drafts, but I think I’ve got the story in a solid place.

Since I’m trying to style it as an episode of Tron: Uprising, a lot of the episode titles are one word, so I’m calling it “Another.”

It’s split into 4 chapters and runs a little over 5,000 words.

-

Rough drafts: Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4

Second drafts: Part 1 | Part 2 version 1 | Part 2 version 2

Final draft: Combined Parts (you are here)

-

01. The Encounter

With Tron healed, he had started going on missions with Beck, along with taking on some solo missions of his own.

Strangely enough, the Occupation had been subdued lately, which was cause for suspicion, so they had gone out into Argon together to see if they could pick up on any hints or information.

Things had been rather boring, right up until they got ambushed by a group of five Occupation programs.

There were four Sentries lead by an unmasked female program with a blank expression on her face.

Beck had never seen the leading program before, but Tron seemed completely surprised at who stood before them.

There was no time for questions, though, the four Sentries rushed Beck, while their leader went after Tron.

The Sentries kept Beck occupied, coordinating their attacks to keep him on the defense and distracted.

On the other hand, Tron and the new program were fighting furiously, though neither one was landing a blow on the other. Move for move, they matched each other, striking and blocking again and again.

Beck slowly managed to take out his opponents one by one, until the last one was left unconscious.

Their leader blocked Tron's attack and looked around to confirm that her crew was incapacitated.

She disengaged from the fight, fleeing the way she had come.

Tron yelled one word after her, "Ark!"

The program paused as she looked back with a gasp, her eyes widening as she showed the first scrap of emotion since she had arrived.

It lasted only an instant before she shook her head, her expression blanked out once more, and she resumed running away.

Beck, worn out from his four-on-one battle looked from Tron to where the program had left, then back again.

Tron wasn't pursuing her, though he looked somewhat shaken at the encounter.

Beck made his way over to Tron, "You know her?"

Tron didn't take his eyes off where she had gone, "I did a long time ago."

Beck raised an eyebrow, "Care to tell me about it?"

"No."

Beck was about to protest about more potentially dangerous secrets when Tron sighed and continued, "But, I'll tell you when we get back to the lair."

Tron lead the way back, while Beck's mind buzzed with questions, who was she?

Once at the lair, Beck fidgeted slightly as he waited for Tron, he knew there was no sense in pushing him, he'd do it on his own time.

Suddenly, almost without warning, Tron spoke, "Her name is Ark."

That was the one thing Beck had figured out, but, it was a start.

"You know that you're not the first to wear my circuits. She was the second."

Beck raised an eyebrow, but chose to say nothing yet.

"Don't give me that look. It's different, we knew each other way back before the Occupation took over."

Tron walked up to the display screen and tapped a few buttons, bringing up an image of Ark, this time in blue circuits, instead of the red of the Occupation.

"She was a System Monitor. She was a hard worker and we ended up working together several times. She was friendly with the ISOs, which caused some trouble, but it ultimately saved her life."

Tron activated another image, this time, one of a cloaked program with jagged sickly yellow light lines.

"Right before the coup happened, Clu used a virus to cause chaos and further his goals. There was going to be a ceremony celebrating a share of power between Basics and ISOs, but the virus interrupted, causing death and destruction.

"Ark was stationed outside, the virus had gone in a different way, so her and some of the other System Monitors had no idea anything was wrong until programs suddenly fled the ceremony.

"All of the Monitors helped calm down the crowd and got all of the programs to safety. Then, they split up to try and find out what they could about the virus.

"Ark ended up alone in the heart of the city, when an ISO pulled her into an alley. They told her that programs were being rounded up for the Games, that System Monitors were disappearing, and that I was dead. They begged her to hide, afraid that her friendliness with the ISOs would cause her death.

"She was reluctant to give up, but the more the ISO told her, the more it made sense that something bigger than she could handle was going down. She couldn't protect the system if she was dead, so she promised to hide for a short while, but if nothing happened, then she'd continue looking for answers.

"This seemed to appease the ISO, who fled to their own hiding spot and Ark never saw them again.

"As for Ark, she found a place to hide that gave her a prime vantage point to see all of the missing System Monitors march in with red circuits to take over the city. If she hadn't been warned, then she would've been rectified like the rest of them or killed for her defiance."

Beck frowns at this, "She's rectified now, though, so what happened?"

"I did." Tron replied. "She stayed hidden for a while, until things settled down and she wasn't in immediate danger. From there, she quietly snuck around and learned about the Occupation and their takeover. She didn't care much for them, so she took matters into her own hands, stopping them from bullying innocent programs and picking fights whenever she saw just a couple of them."

Tron smiled wistfully, "In that way, you remind me of her. Both of you fought back despite the odds, because you didn't like what the system had become under the Occupation."

He sighed softly, "Anyway, it wasn't long before people were talking about some kind of vigilante, so I sought her out. We recognized each other immediately and she agreed to team up with me without hesitation.

"She was a good Renegade, but didn't last long. After more successful missions, there was word going around about a dangerous new weapon that the Occupation was working on nearby. The information seemed suspect, but Ark insisted on investigating it. To her, the risk of the weapon being real was too great to ignore.

"So, she went in alone. I waited at the rendezvous point for far longer than the meeting time we had agreed on, but she never came back. After that, I never saw her again. I had hoped that meant she was dead, rather than forced to be rectified, but I wasn't sure if that really was worse or better."

Tron shook his head, "With her suddenly showing up after all of these cycles, it's likely the Occupation is trying to use her to draw us into a trap. We must proceed carefully from here on out. If you see her, do not engage."

It was Beck's turn to sigh as he tried to process all of this new information, "All right, I promise. We won't jump into anything without being sure of it."

He walked over to Tron and put a hand on his shoulder, "We'll get her back, I promise. She recognized her name, she's still in there somewhere."

Tron nodded silently before replying, "Thank you."

-

02. The Mistake

Even though Tron didn't know exactly what had happened to Ark, he could guess on the details. However, he had no idea of the depth of what went on after she was captured...

Ark understood Tron's concerns, but this time, her concerns had outweighed his. He knew he couldn't stop her from going, so he had suggested that they meet back up at a certain place and time, so that if she was pursued, he could give her a hand.

She had agreed to this, said her goodbyes, then took off. She had been studying the building and the guard patterns for some time now, so she knew sneaking in would be easy. After that, though, there was little information, just that somewhere in the building was a weapon that Clu could use to easily stop any programs that even thought about resisting. Tron, her, and anyone else they could recruit would be in even more danger than ever.

The lack of information gave her pause, though, and for a moment, she considered turning back around. But, her pride and stubbornness won out and she kept going. This was something she had to do, even if Tron didn't agree with it.

She wore his circuits, like she did on every mission, and they brought her some comfort. Even if he wasn't here with her, he was the best on the Grid, maybe some of his talents came along with his emblem.

Getting in was just a matter of waiting for the right time, and she had timed her approach to coincide with the Sentries' movements.

For an instant, she wondered that if this gap in the guards was purposeful, and that Tron was right. But, she shook her head, if she kept believing that she'd fail, then she would. Even if Tron was right, and it was a trap, she had gotten out of worse situations. They both had.

Once she was in, she wandered endless dark hallways empty of everything but her footsteps. Trying to walk as quietly as possible, she made her way through the building, until she entered a large room.

Sticking to the edges and finding nothing and no one there, she slowly walked towards the middle to see if she could find anything there.

What she found was an ambush.

Countless Sentries dropped down from above and went in after her.

Ark activated her staff and fought for her life. She derezzed what felt like endless amounts of Sentries, but there were still far more of them than she had energy to deal with. The longer the battle went on, the more exhausted she got, starting to falter and make mistakes. After receiving quite a few injuries, she finally collapsed and was immediately surrounded.

Two Sentries hauled her to her knees, holding her upright by grabbing her arms tightly. She felt a disc rest at the back of her neck, another reminder that she wasn't going anywhere of her own accord.

Glowing yellow circuits ominously appeared in the darkness and walked towards her as Ark realized just how much trouble she was in. The Administrator himself had set this trap and she had just walked right into it.

Clu leaned down, "Well now, what do we have here? You're clearly not Tron, but you're wearing his circuits. Let's see who you really are."

He reached up under her chin and casually pressed the button to deactivate her helmet and reveal her face.

As her helmet disappeared, Ark directed a defiant glare up at Clu.

"You? Now, isn't this interesting? Here I thought all of the System Monitors were under my control, but it seems I've been mistaken. I thought Abraxas had gotten you all those cycles ago. You're quite resilient to survive everything after all this time. Well, until now."

Clu paced in front of her, seemingly trying to make a decision, "What to do with you? Obviously, I can't let you go. You've been disrupting things and making a nuisance of yourself."

Suddenly, he's back in front of her, leaning down, "How about a deal? I could use more competent soldiers like yourself. Give me Tron's location, willingly join me, and you'll survive. I'll make sure that you're well taken care of, with all the comforts you desire. I can't imagine your vigilante lifestyle is terribly cozy. It's a more than generous offer, but, what can I say, you've caught me in a good mood."

Ark's only reply was an icy glare.

"Oh. You're going to do this the hard way. Suit yourself. There's ways of getting the information I want and ways of making you work for me. They won't be any fun for you, but the programs torturing you will definitely enjoy it."

He takes a step back, "I could look at your disc and get Tron's location out of your memories, but, I want to hear you say it. I want you to give up your hero and personally betray him. I want you to know that resisting me will get you and those you care about absolutely nowhere."

Clu casually waves a hand to the programs holding her, "You know where to take her."

The two Sentries drag Ark off. She doesn't cooperate with them, but, since she's trying to save her energy, she doesn't fight them, either. She just goes limp and makes them drag her along.

When they reach the designated torture room, she uses every last scrap of energy to try and break free. She manages it for a moment, but it's a short lived freedom as they tackle her and slam her to the ground.

They pick her up and drag her to a table and strap her to it. For all the trouble she's caused, one of them hits the corner of the table, causing it to spin. When it settles, she's stuck at an angle and upside down.

It's disorienting and she's left like this for a while, until a program she doesn't recognize comes in.

She's adjusted to be back upright and the torture begins. Bursts of electricity are sent through her at different strengths and at various places.

The process is horrific, but Ark seeks refuge in her code, focusing on it instead of the pain. As a System Monitor, she's programmed to protect the Grid and do what's best for it. Giving up Tron would doom everyone, so she's secure in the knowledge that no matter how much this hurts, she's doing what has to be done.

Her screams echo down the hallway, but she never begs for it to stop, she never says anything coherent at all.

The torture is endless, all she knows is pain. Ark doesn't know how much time has passed or how much longer it'll go on. Sometimes she's left alone to recover, but the peace just makes the next torture session hurt all the worse.

Her torturer seems irritated that she won't break. At one point, she was jabbed in the side with an even higher amount of electricity and pain than usual, and after that, things never felt quite right. But, it was hard to tell much of anything around all of the pain.

Cycles pass and it's hard for Ark to know where she is any more. All she knows is that she cannot give up Tron.

Finally, things are different. She's left alone long enough for her to start being able to think. The pain is ever present, but her mind begins to clear.

"Still as resilient as ever." An all-too-familiar voice addressed her. Clu strolls up to Ark, "They say you won't give up your memories, so I'm going to make sure that you no longer have any memories at all."

He turns his attention to another program in the room, "Get her healed up, but leave the scars as a reminder as to what happens to programs that defy me."

Clu looks back to Ark, "I'll see you soon." He leaves the room and his programs to their work.

It takes a while to get Ark back in functioning shape, several different healing techniques are needed in order to repair the extensive damage done to her over many, many cycles. The outlines of the vast amount of injuries remain, though, just as Clu had ordered.

They bring her to another room where Clu was awaiting them. Two programs remove her from the table, and as soon as she's free, Ark tries to break away and escape. But, she's easily stopped by several more programs she hadn't been aware of.

Clu smirks, "A fighter right up until the very end. That's what makes you so valuable. It'd be a shame to just derezz you."

Ark's shoved into a glass chamber, which she immediately tries to break.

Clu watches her struggle for a short period of time, before signaling for the process to begin.

Ark fights until she can't any more. She struggles to resist what the machine's forcing her to do, until it finally takes over and her programming is overlaid with the Occupation's mind-controlling code.

Once the process is over, she's removed from the chamber and Clu inspects her.

"A story Flynn once mentioned comes to mind. He often spoke of an old User city called Rome. There resided someone who was called 'The God of War'. I think that's a fitting title for her, she'll help me put an end to the war for the Grid. Now, she just needs the name to go along with it." He puts a hand on her shoulder and addresses her, "We've got a lot of work to do, Mars."

-

03. The Rescue

Tron and Beck kept getting ambushed by Ark. Again and again, she'd show up with a group of Sentries, instigate a fight, and then flee afterwards.

They catalogued everything about every instance, especially the location, and a pattern began to emerge.

She was slowly leading them somewhere. But, at this point in time, it was hard to tell exactly where. There were many buildings in that direction, and quite a few of them were under the Occupation's control.

If they could figure out where quickly enough, they could spring the trap before the Occupation could set it.

Most of the time, she attacked them when they were together, but on occasion, she would fight just one of them.

So, Beck and Tron made a plan to split up and track Ark. Since she knew Tron and seemed focused on him, he'd fight her, while Beck would follow her when she fled.

It took a few tries to get it right. Several times, she attacked before they split up or ended up targeting Beck instead.

But, soon, everything lined up in their favor. When she was focused on Tron, Beck was able to stay back and keep eyes on her.

He kept a safe distance from Ark, making sure that she didn't know she was being followed. After they traveled several blocks, finally, she entered a large building.

Memorizing everything he thought was useful, he met back up with Tron to give him the information.

Thanks to being a System Monitor and his close association with Flynn, Tron had access to schematics of all the buildings in the city. The Occupation would've modified the building to their needs, but they had enough to work with.

Based off the blueprints and their experience with the Occupation, there were a couple places that they were likely to be holding Ark.

One of the sides of the building had a loading area, so, when Occupation members were busy unloading a truck, Beck and Tron slipped right past them.

They silently headed up the stairs, the first two floors they tried didn't look like holding areas, but the third was lined with cells.

The floor was dark, and only one cell had an active barrier and an occupant. As they crept closer, it was clear that Ark was in the cell. She was standing there with the blank expression on her face that she always had.

It didn't take long for them to deactivate the barrier and set her free. Tron darted in and quickly stunned her with a low-power pulse, just enough to knock her out for a short while.

Tron scooped up Ark to carry her in his arms and followed behind Beck as they left faster than they had come in.

Things continue going smoothly until they reach the loading area and are greeted by a group of Sentries.

With Tron's hands full, all the fighting came down to Beck, while Tron dodged discs left and right.

They weren't trying to win, just make a path to freedom. As soon as there was an opportunity, they ran for it, though Beck still had to knock down a few opponents.

Paige arrived on the scene just in time to see the two Renegades escape with a captive Occupation member.

Tron and Beck had set up a temporary base in the city, so they secured Ark and hid there while the Occupation searched the city for them.

Once they rested up from their frantic flight, they started investigating Ark's disc. Ark herself had woken up and was just staring blankly off into space.

The Occupation code seemed to be overlaid over her original code, though there were a few older memories that were mixed in and easily accessible.

A quick check of the memories revealed her repeated torture at the hands of the Occupation. There was nothing else before or after that of Ark's memories, the torture suddenly stopped, there was a gap of time, and then her memories of being with the Occupation began.

Since Ark had seemed to respond to Tron's voice before, they tried it again. Tron stood in view of her and said her name.

Like before, her eyes widened and she gasped softly, before returning back to her empty gaze.

Beck had been monitoring her disc, when she recognized Tron, a memory had briefly bubbled to the surface and he had managed to activate it.

It was a short memory, and the timestamp indicated that it was from some time before the Occupation took over.

There was no context to it, it just consisted of Ark standing there in her System Monitor armor, while Tron praised her for a job well done.

Beck looked to Tron, "Looks like she really thought a lot of you."

Tron nodded quietly, and with a heavy sigh, he went back to looking at Ark's disc, "There has to be something else we can use to bring her back."

Beck thought this over, "I'm just a mechanic, but, my wrench works with a lot of things, lemme try it."

He took the disc from Tron and attached his wrench to it. More information popped up and he started scouring the data.

The layer of Occupation code was straightforward, except for one section, where it seemed to go around and bypass something. The more he looked into it, it was clear that something was wrong, but he had no idea what it could possibly be.

"Hey, look at this. Something's off here, but I don't know what."

Tron gave it a look, "I'm not sure, either. We need a medic to figure it out."

Beck sighed, "I only know one medic, and I don't think she's too interested in helping us."

Tron looked at Beck resolutely, "We'll figure something out." They weren't on a time crunch now, so they had time to look into different options.

With nothing more they could do right now, they both took a much-needed rest.

-

04. The Return

As time rolled on, both Tron and Beck investigated Ark's disc, but came to no new conclusions. Time passing also lessened the search against them, so much so, that they decided to take turns going out into the city. Maybe a change of pace would help, and maybe they could find a medic willing to assist the Renegades.

Their brief jaunts into the city were unmemorable for the most part, right up until Paige found Beck.

He had continued to wear the Renegade armor and helmet, in the hopes that someone sympathetic and loyal to the cause would offer their help, but, this time, he got slammed to the ground instead.

"Where is she?!" Paige yelled, "What did you do with her?!"

Beck saw the opportunity this presented, and the many problems that came with it, and took a leap of faith.

"She's safe, but she needs help."

Paige hissed, "She needs help because you kidnapped her."

Beck shook his head the best he could, "It's more than that. There's something wrong with her disc."

Paige growled, "She could get the proper care with the Occupation, instead of a couple of vigilantes."

Beck sighed, "Look, I'll make you a deal."

Paige interrupted, "I don't make deals with kidnappers."

"Just hear me out. If you can fix her, you can take her back to the Occupation, no trouble. I just ask that you watch her memories and make sure that you think that going back to the Occupation is the right thing for her."

This gives Paige pause and she considers it. If this offer was valid, the Renegade would take her straight to his hideout, then she'd have the location of both Renegades and the kidnapped Occupation member. There was a chance that this was a trap, but, she knew that she could take both Renegades, or at least hold them off long enough while she called for backup.

There was no way she could lose. "Fine. Take me to her. The sooner we get this done, the sooner she'll be back where she belongs."

Paige let Beck up and he lead the way, "Do you even know who she is?"

"I don't know every member of the Occupation."

Beck looked back to her, "She was locked up in a cell. Did you ever think that maybe they didn't want you to know who she was?"

Paige didn't like this, but found a plausible reason, "If something's wrong with her, maybe she was quarantined."

Beck turned his gaze ahead, "Maybe. You'll be able to figure it out once you look at her disc."

He took her around a long path, trying to obscure the location as best he could. It might be a temporary lair, but he didn't want to just hand the Occupation an invitation.

As they entered, Beck warned Tron by saying loudly, "I brought a guest."

Out of their current line of sight, Tron activated his helmet and stood watch in the corner. He wasn't sure what was going on, but he trusted Beck.

Paige eyed the sparse room, "Nice place you got here."

Beck just shrugged, "Hey, you work with what you've got."

Paige went over to Ark and started examining her. Once she's done, she looks to Beck, "Nothing seems wrong with her physically, except for some scar remnants and the fact that she never reacted to me looking her over, did you sedate her?"

Beck shook his head, "No. All of that is the Occupation's doing."

Paige snorted, "We'll see about that."

She carefully undocked Ark's disc and started looking at the files, "Her code's a mess."

Beck gestured to Ark, "The Occupation again."

Paige rolled her eyes and got back to work. Clearly the Renegade was going to be no help to her.

She got down to the code bypass and frowned as she saw what it was going around, "Her energy processor is completely burned out, only a large amount of electricity could do that. She was unconscious when you took her, how hard did you shock her?"

Beck shook his head, "Not that hard. We didn't want to hurt her, so we used the minimum amount to knock her out."

Paige gestured angrily at him, "Then why is her processor destroyed?"

Beck gestured right back, "You'll find that answer in her memories. The older ones before the gap." He paused, then added, "You're not going to like it, though."

Paige snorted, "We'll see about that."

She confidently went to the indicated memories, sure that she'd see some sort of injustice acted upon this program by one or both of the Renegades.

Instead, she watched in absolute horror as a red-circuited Occupation program brutally tortured the program again and again.

She's about to accuse the Renegade of rewriting the memories, but she keeps looking, there's far too many matching memories for it all of them to be altered. Something on this scale would be far too dangerous for the program involved.

Paige wavered, her faith shaken. But, she quickly came back to her senses. She had a patient to take care of.

She went back to the damaged portion of the disc and went to work. She's not seen this kind of damage often and she wasn't prepared for it, so it's slow going.

After quite a while, she finally gets the energy processor fixed, but she's not done yet. Digging through the files, she sees that the messy, overlaid code is locked in as the default setting.

Paige does some experimenting, and after seeing the old memory featuring Tron, she uses it to make a backdoor around the default code. Combining the bypass with the remnants of older code from the memory, she's able to reconnect the original code. Once it's in place, she locks the original code to default and seals away the added code. With the extra code unconnected to anything, it won't cause any harm to the program, so she leaves it as is.

She double-checks her work, and once she's confident that everything's correct, she hands the disc to Beck.

"This should fix her. I have to go."

As Paige quietly leaves back out into the city, Tron looks over to Beck.

"I don't think she liked what she saw."

Beck nodded, "I think maybe her faith in the Occupation was finally shaken. I hope so, anyway."

"We can only hope."

Beck then put Ark's disc back on her dock and they waited while all the changes loaded and took place.

Tron stood in front of Ark, so that he'd be the first person she saw after coming back.

The process takes a while, but, finally, Ark's eyes light up and her expression warms from the cold look they had been accustomed to seeing. She blinks while looking around and gathering her bearings.

Finally, she realizes that Tron's there and she gasps, "Tron! You were right, it was a trap, I'm sorry I didn't listen to you."

Before he can reply, more memories hit, "Wait...they...they rectified me. How did you fix me?"

Tron gave a small smile, "With the help of a friend." He gestured Beck over, "This is Beck, and he knew someone that was able to help you."

Ark smiled and nodded to Beck, "Thanks and thanks to your friend for saving me."

Beck gave her a grin, "You're welcome. And, welcome back to the Resistance."

Tron walked over and freed her from her restraints. Ark stretched out the stiffness, then gave Beck a grin of her own, "It's good to be back."

[trimac7]

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[littleeyesofpallas]

Was chatting with a coworker the other day and two things crossed my mind...

that I've been at this weeb shit so long that I forget what I just sort of take for granted and what might not be commonly known little factoids, and

that VIZ's attempt at a monthly Shonen Jump magazine has been gone so long most people probably never saw them. (nevermind the old RAIJIN Graphic Novels that tried the same thing)

So, here's some fun little things you might not have known about manga if you've only ever read English publications and/or digital scans...

For one, there's the matter of print formatting... In general, Japan actually uses their own standards for print that tend to differ from those in the US; The JIS(Japanese Industrial Standards) series A and B. Magazines like the typical anthology format manga are printed in JIS B5, which is comparable to the US Letter standard, or the ISO A4.

This was the same format that RAIJIN Comics printed in as well, and although I don't have a copy of the old English Shonen Jump for reference, if memory serves they printed in the same format as well in an attempt to really sell that "authentic" manga feel. Sadly, I don't know that the effort or attention to detail was much appreciated. Neither published a volume comparable to a Japanese weekly or even monthly serial magazine, though --not by a long shot. But this might not be the most practical for comparrison, since there actually just isn't much of an English language equivalent format. (unless you count actual magazines that happen to include comic illustrations or miniscule comic strip segments)

Despite the mammoth size of a serial magazine, Japanese tankoban are actually smaller than the North American equivalent. But notably the Japanese small book format isn't just a matter of contending with nearest print standards... What I believe is the JIS B40(although I could be wrong) tends to be the standard print size of small books in general, not just manga, and it's a print size that is only marginally smaller than VIZ's standard size manga, but with the very particular benefit of being deliberately portable. The small difference in size is the difference between a Japanese manga fitting in my coat pocket where as the English equivalent can't.

(I realize I photographed a copy of Shonen ACE, and not Weekly JUMP, but I measured a copy of Weekly JUMP for the thickness and not the copy of ACE; the copy of JUMP was around 506pg, while the copy of ACE was 570pg. Those are both older though, and the most recent digital copy i have of Weekly JUMP actually had around 520pg)

And I don't think it's always addressed just what a difference there is, culturally, in how Japan approaches the print medium. It's kind of an old cliche by this point, and I don't know how accurate it's remained in the past decade or so, but the quintessential image passed around between comic nerds has always been the Japanese bullet train; A place packed with commuters all passing their transit time with isolated preoccupation with music and/or reading, with manga being the king of this time killing arena. And its not just about sheer popularity driven by interest, American comic vendors have long envied the sheer accessibility of manga in Japan.

Here in the U.S. we used to have a thriving newsstand retail scene for comic books, and a kind of similar ease of grab and go comic purchase, rather than the explicitly niche interest driven "direct market" model that has been slowly but surly strangling the comic market ever since. But in Japan serialized manga has remained in relatively quick, impulse friendly, arm's reach of readers on the go. And what lubricates that business model more than anything is price.

I still remember a time when VIZ dominated the English manga market by offering at $7.95(and am I crazy or am I remembering a time when it got down to $6.99?) but now'days it's settled on a low end of $9.99. You know how much the recent vol.29 of My Hero Academia goes for? ¥484. That's less than $4.50.

You know how much that big ass magazine with 500+ pages and 21 different series goes for? Do you think it's more or less than the little pocket-size tankoban? Did you guess something close to ¥290? That's less than $2.75. But how does something bigger in both page size and page count managed to sell for less???

There are a few secrets to that, but one is that the things are packed to the gills with ads. But that's the boring answer. The other feature contributing to keeping an accessible cost on weekly/monthly manga is something we don't think about much in the U.S.; it's the paper and print quality.

The nice little books are printed in what you might expect as far as starch white paper and clean black inks, but those big honkin' phone book(do people still know what phonebooks look like??) size magazines are printed on cheap recycled pulpy newpaper with typically rough print jobs. This is most noticeable in the quality of solid blacks, and when scanning the texture of "white" space.

(I tried to take individual photos of different series chapters to show off the fact that the paper is differently colored... but my phone's camera seems to be smart enough to auto balance that kind of thing when there's no other context to anchor it to. (It doesn't help that it's night and my lights have a harsh yellowing glow to them.) but on th left you can still kind of see the different paper colors; this particular issue alternated every 3 chapters between pink-ish, green/gray, a kind of off-white/gray, and sepia, but I've also seen blue-ish, oranges, and a different shade of yellow different from the sepia-ish one.)

Back in ye olden days when it came to fan scanlations, more slapdash teams and projects would often stumble over levels in photoshop (too much black and the pulpy paper texture shows up as grainy shadows, but too far white and the edges of lineart get crunchy and ugly) but those who had more robust readership and a regular streamlined flow of work, we'd actually go in and touch up the solid blacks and whites by hand. We'd also redraw art to erase overlaid text so the type setters could lay the new English in over top.

(Weekly Jump: Left, Bleach tankoban: Right)

They do however keep a few coveted color pages in better quality paper and ink. In contrast, the standard quality tankoban actually don't include color pages at all, and just print what had been color pages in grayscale. There are also all kind of irregularities between publishers and special editions and such, but on the most basic level this difference in quality both keeps serial prices down, while also incentivizing tankoban purchase.

In the U.S. we might still have the draw of an ad-free reading experience in our TPB, but the print quality between a biweekly issue and a TPB are basically the same. Incidentally, even though manga are generally drafted at a much larger scale than even the serial magazine proportions anyway, the scaled down size of the tankoban also serves to sharpen the image. When put side by side the nice clean tankoban print looks noticeably better than the serial.

Now'days the English scanlation scene seems to be conducted almost entirely through ripped digital releases (at least as far as I can tell with popular, regular weekly titles) which is great for quality, frankly, but it does kind of lack the charm and personal touch of a band of amateurs finding round about solutions to a convoluted bootlegging pipeline. But obviously I'm a little biased.

[edit]: Oops i posted this without really ending it in any sensible ro conclusive way... I feel like ive lost sight of the point since i first drafted this but I guess its mostly just me pining after if we could just get super cheap, disposable quality, bulk manga in that classic Japanese magazine model to work here in the states. I already tend to sell manga in big runs, even at $9.99+, and frequently I'll have customers put volumes back, or clearly want the next volume but just can't afford it and wait to come back. If I could sell these customers more volumes, and more importantly more titles, at the same price, I would love to. I would love to see these things fly off the shelves. I would love to see people keeping up with multiple series. I would love to see someone look at a 44vol long series and actually feel like that's a number of volumes they can afford.

[fallen--lilith]

RIP

I’m going to a con Saturday and all I have to wear really is wrestling shirts and pants from halloween  ( I highly doubt anyone knows Kenny Omega)  and just nerdy shirts in general. I donated all my dresses.... I just want to dress up as something. ( I was going as Shinji too but finding a white shirt is so hard let alone one that fits my dumb wide shoulders )

Honestly I just want to wear something sexy and out of character for me but being raised by prude parents I just can’t. I’m iso tired of dressing casually boring. Like I’m not sexy but just for one day...it just makes me feel sick. 

[dskimages]

May today find you the peace that I felt as I walked along the Danube in Regensburg. Some parts of traveling can be exhausting, some frantic, some thrilling, some boring, and some peaceful. This was a peaceful moment. At least that's the way I remember it now. Perhaps it was from the day of traveling and by this point being able to relax again. Perhaps it was joining up with another part of my family on a separate itinerary through Europe and so seeing them again. Perhaps it was not having anything specific planned for the rest of this day and just having time to meander around the old town. Perhaps it was the quietly flowing waters of the river peacefully slipping by. For whatever the reason, it seemed at least a little bit peaceful. Or perhaps just seeing this and remembering such is giving me a glimpse of a peaceful feeling in the midst of unsettling times. . Oct 2018 . If you want to follow just my travel pics, see @DSKwanders . (all pics are shown on @dskImages) . Nikon D610, f22, 1/200s, ISO-500, 24mm, Nikkor 24-120mm, 3.5-5.6 ED AF Adobe Lightroom enhancements. . #DSKImagesNW #mydailypic #mydailyphoto #SundaySights #throughmylens #InstaPhoto #InstaGood #Beautiful #JustGoShoot #InstaFocus #Buildings #VisualLife #Visuals #PicturePerfect #Architecture #Nikon #NikonPhotography #outforawalk #AlongthePath #StreetShot #StreetVision #UrbanShot #StreetView #CityScape #inthecity #CityPic #CityPhoto #UrbanPic #CityShot #streets_vision https://www.instagram.com/p/CTuU8rugqsQ/?utm_medium=tumblr