#or just leave in the middle of the nighy

[29121996]

IF I SAY A FUCKING WORD .

[lieutenantselnia]

Davy Jones' Origin

Some time ago I’ve started to wonder if Davy Jones possibly spoke Scottish Gaelic besides English, or if it could even be his actual first language. Although he is never shown speaking it or having a particular connection to his homeland besides speaking with a Scottish accent, I think it would make sense, given Scotland’s history before and during the 18th century. Therefore, I thought this could be an interesting topic to examine. Mind you that I’m not a historian, and not an expert on those topics, I merely love exploring and extending the backstory of one of my favourite characters.

Spoiler: I don’t even get to discuss the initial topic itself in this text, this serves more as a setup where I try to sort my countless thoughts that I have about Davy. I plan to talk about it in another text some time in the future though.

Before looking at the language topic, I think it makes sense to look at Davy’s general background. His origins and his life before he fell in love with Calypso are largely unknown. It can only be estimated for how long he has roamed the seas ever since, but I think it is safe to assume that it has been multiple decades at least, though more likely centuries already.

The official wiki states that he and Calypso met and fell in love at an unknown date – and under unknown circumstances – between 1600 and 1660. It is not known for how long their relationship lasted before Calypso made him captain of the Flying Dutchman and put him in charge of ferrying souls to the afterlife. It could have been mere weeks, but also months or even years. In case of the latter, they probably saw each other on a semi-regular basis, as Davy would visit her during his voyages. All in all, it leaves a lot of room for interpretation (and fanfictions).

However, it is known that as Davy felt betrayed by Calypso when she didn’t show up to meet him, after he had fulfilled his duty loyally for ten years, he convinced the newly formed Brethren Court to bind her in human form. For some reason, the German PotC wiki states that the First Brethren Court convened presumably around 1640. Although there are no sources cited to back up this claim, there is no explicit contradiction to be found either. Assuming it is true – after all, it would be within the given timeframe – , Davy would have taken up his duty around the year 1630. By the time the movies take place, he would therefore have captained the Dutchman for around 100 years.

In a few instances of the official wiki, Davy is described as a “young sailor” when he meets Calypso. In other instances, no indication on his age is given. “Young” could supposedly mean he was in his 20s or 30s, which would therefore set his birth date around 1600.

On the other hand, he already looks significantly older when Calypso reveals his human form (the actor Bill Nighy was in his late 50s at the time the movies were produced). Of course he could simply have aged, however – though this is just my personal opinion – I like to think that he was already on the more mature side when he became cursed – possibly somewhere between the age of 40 and 60 – and that the curse either stops or at least alters the natural aging process of any person affected.

There is barely any specific canon information on this, but as shown in the movies, both Davy and the rest of the crew have maintained excellent physical strength and agility (in fact, it’s even enhanced compared to regular humans). This makes me assume that the curse either just stops their aging process and they stay at the same level of physical fitness that they had when they first fell under the curse, or that their transformation into sea creatures somehow slows down or alters the process, for example by balancing out their age-related physical decay by adopting more and more features from animals or other marine life.

Assuming he was already a middle-aged man, possibly around age 50, Davy would have been born in the late 1500s. On a personal note, I could also imagine that the story as a whole took place even earlier, and that Davy could have been born anytime during the 1500s or even the late 1400s. As the whole story around Davy Jones and Calypso is held very vaguely and even treated as a legend, there aren’t many concrete contradictions. However, as the First Brethren Court and Calypso’s capture are said to herald the start of the Golden Age of Piracy – which historically took place roughly between 1650 and 1730 – , it makes sense for those events to take place at a later date to connect everything (somewhat) logically.

To conclude this little examination and sum up the numbers: Davy Jones was presumably born in the second half of the 16th century. He and Calypso met before or around the year 1630, and around another ten years later, after their mutual betrayal and Davy abandoning his duty as a result, the curse started to take effect. Up until the events of Dead Man’s Chest, he has already captained the Flying Dutchman for almost a century, and reached an age of about 150 years – although due to the curse, this number doesn’t have a particular meaning in relation to his health or physical condition.

Of course, in the end this all is just my interpretation based on the rather sparse information that the official canon gives us. But it was certainly fun to finally bring some of my countless thoughts about Davy onto paper (trust me, there are a lot of those whirring around in my mind, but it’s not always easy to get hold of them). I haven’t even touched on the topic I actually wanted to talk about – that being Davy Jones’ relation to the Gaelic language and his homeland Scotland, but I really hope to do so in another essay.

Sources: https://pirates.fandom.com/wiki/Timeline_of_Pirates_of_the_Caribbean_series https://fluch-der-karibik.fandom.com/wiki/Zeitlinie_Fluch_der_Karibik

[random-fandom1]

Pepper thought it was good idea to go away for a few days. A few days away to herself, she deserved it right? Not much could go wrong, could it?

Well, let's just say you can't underestimate the avengers...

- ⴵ -

Day 1 of Peppers absence

Most of the over 30 year olds (minus Clint and Scott) were doing their own thing. Tony and Bruce were inside their labs doing their thing, Natasha, Steve, Sam and Bucky were sparring in the training rooms, and the rest of them were doing their own adulty things. They were sticking to their own routines, because why would they have to change them? Its not like Peppers absence was to make them less 'mature'

That left a majority the under 30s (with the addition of Clint and Scott and minus Bucky, Loki and Valkyrie) to run wild. The loss of the mature adults meant they could go free. Peter, Yelena, Shuri and Wanda had a spa day. They all took turns painting eachothers nails, doing the others hair and just full out pampering eachother. Scott, Clint, Pietro and Carol looked on in disgust because that's so girly, right? Well that's what they thought until they were dragged into the action as well. Scott and Pietro were enjoying themselves as well after 20 minutes but Clint and Carol despised it. For this reason, they came out looking like Barbie dolls. All pink makeup, bows, frills. Blackmail pictures were taken.

They all got together at 5, Bucky and Loki cooked dinner for them all (The famous Gigi Hadid vodka Pasta) and they all watched Star Wars before going to bed.

- ⍟ -

Day 2 of Peppers absence

Peace didn't stay for long. It lasted a day.

It all started at 6am the next morning when Peter and Bucky were awoken from their sleep, entangled in one another, soaken wet. Clint quickly retreated back into his vent, not fast enough for the two enhanced not to spot him. That was how the prank war began.

Next Vision gave Wanda one of her favourite flowers, which then proceeded to spray her in the face

Shuri and Val replaced Steve's shampoo with lime green hair dye (Tony said he was his big leprechaun)

Yelena turned the water to freezing cold when Natasha was having a shower

Teams were made by 10am. It was almost the same divide as yesterday. Peter, Bucky, Shuri, Val, Carole, Scott, Yelena, Wanda, Loki, Pietro and Sam made one team. They called themselves the Young Avengers. The other team consisted of Steve, Natasha, Clint, Tony, Vision, a reluctant Bruce, Thor, Dr Strange and Nebula.

To say it was a mess was an understatement. By the end of the day the training centres were covered in water from a water balloon fight that went on around 12, Stonys bedroom had been filled with balloons, Yelena had managed to vandalise Clints secret tunnels, Natasha had in turn played an audio recording of Yelena having a pretend interview with herself in the shower around the compound. Bucky, Sam and Peter had covered Thor in honey and then put feathers on him. Loki then enchanted him to run round like a chicken for 2 hours. Tony had locked Pietro in heavy shoes, stopping him from running away and dyed his hair neon pink. Peter had posted embarrassing videos of the other team That wasn't even half of what happened.

They called a truce around 11pm, not before Nebula had managed to fill Scott's room with Baskin Robins uniforms

- ᗢ -

Day 3 of Peppers absence

Day 3 was just, surprisingly, wholesome. Everyone was recovering from last days war and decided to just order a shit ton of food and relax. Tony didn't even go to the lab! They all cuddled up on the couch and watched movies all day.

Tony and Steve were on one couch, Bruce and Thor were on another, and Wanda and Vision were on another showing little PDA. But on the other side of the room, Peter and Bucky as well as MJ and Shuri were sprawled across two differnet couches, showing off quite alot of PDA. Close to an unbearable amount of it. Peter was sat on Buckys lap, mouthing at his neck like a baby and Bucky was running his hands all over his body in a slow, gentle manner. It wasnt a sexual thing (Peter would be mortified to do that with his parents and family sitting right there), ot was more of a cmofort thing. MJ and Shuri had no shame. None. They were full on making out. It made nearly everyone around them uncomfortable.

Nether the less, the day was spent eating junk food, having a Harry Potter marathon (Peter tried to suggest Star Wars but was quickly shut down by nearly everyone else). Of course by the end of the day, the place was a tip. Pizza boxes scattered around the room, popcorn all over the couches from Sam and Buckys popcorn fight, pillows turned upside down and a huge pillow fort made by Yelena, Shuri and Peter around the middle of Goblet of Fire. Missing the only mature mature adults, they left it as it was and retired atthe end of DHPt2.

- ⎈ -

Day 4 of Peppers absence

The day before Pepper was to return was havoc.

To start it off, they had no food. None. Pepper normally ordered all the food on the large whiteboard in the kitchen every 2 weeks, and now with her gone, no one actually placed it. Steve and Natasha had to run to the grocery store in the morning, leaving hungry hero's with high metabolisms to get cranky. They ended up getting only 2 boxes of cereal and a loaf of bread. For 20+ people. For a whole day.

Second of all, no one actually stuck to their bed time for the past few nights. It started off with Shuri snapping at Peter, Peter snapping at Bucky, Bucky snapping at both Sam and Steve, so on and so fourth. Eventually everyone ended up as cranky as the last person. Silence surrounded the compound as everyone migrated to their own spot to calm down. It was so quite that you could hear Clints terrified screams from the kitchen as he tried to disturb a sleeping Peter, who was in his own made cobweb in the corner.

Third, when a majority of people calmed down, the power went out. Not even the back up worked. Turns out no one checked the battery so it blew. Tony and Bruce were there for 3 hours trying to fix it while the rest of the avengers played board games in the main room.

Things were falling apart

- ⎊ -

Day 5 of Peppers absence

Today's the day Peppers meant to be coming back, but her flight got delayed due to weather and she wouldn't be back until late that night. This left another day for the avengers to slowly lose their minds.

It started off like Day 1, until it hit 12pm. Thats when Natasha called them all to living room and demanded a games night. A party nighy where they all get drunk and party like teenagers

It started off with never have i ever, and oh did some things come out, especially about the baby spider of the group. When Tony asked if anyone had ever done the dirty in front of their family/friends, a very embarrassed Peter and a wolfishly grinning Bucky took a shot

Next day played truth or dare. This led to a hot makeout session between Scott and Sam, a half naked Steve and a head standing Vision.

Then it just went downhill at around 6pm. A drunken group of earth's mightiest hero's was just getting started, and by 9pm, they were fucking hammered.

That's how Pepper found them.

Vision was still spinning on his head to the beat of the music in the corner; Loki, Natasha, Tony and Clint were taken shots at the bar; Yelena and Peter were twerking on the coffee table with Bucky, Sam and Shuri cheering from under them, Bucky laying the occasionally slap to Peters arse; Bruce was writing furiously in a notebook; Steve was having a heart to heart with Wanda, both of them crying about how much they lived their families; Thor was of course munching on his emergency poptarts as they still hadn't gotten their food delivery; Pietro was running around Valkyrie so fast that it hurt to look at; and Dr Strange and Nebula were no where to be found

Pepper just slowly backed out of the room, wondering if the plane had gone back to the airport yet

[shy-magpie]

RQG 145

My first EA episode and I'm getting to it 4 hours after release because I'm so excited about joining the Patreon I can’t focus. Its silly but hey birthday money well spent if it makes me this happy right? Ok I think I'm centered enough to hit play.

Eee its going to be my name there someday!

Poor Cel! Poor Azu!

I'm impressed, Alex managed to summarize pretty well given  the circumstances.

Hamid: oh dear! Skraak: Skraak, pressure equalization, Skraak!

What! I was right - he has been getting clearer! Did Alex imply he has been playing up how drugged is? Smart way to get a sense of the party while he gets his feet under him if so.

Thank you Alex, we need those numbers. Oh poor Hamid is confident on a 3.

Skraak is helping! Hamid is listening to him!

~~~Party time~~~

Alarms!

Blast doors? Yes! They won't drown!

Azu! Cel! Zolf!

Point Cel, Shoin seems actively against being useful

Nice, Salt Beard coming up properly after all this time! Scary sounds! Bubbles! Thats got to be a good sign right? Loving the bit with Zolf's thumb!

Not clear what happened plot wise, but Ben did some nice work showing Zolf’s emotions in ways I can’t put into works. Healing time! It is a very Cel, TBF, to quantify their health

Speaker time! Oh thank goodness everyone is healed up. Yeah the food's poisoned we got that with the brunch Hamid was dragged from.

Sweet, torches in the bags of holding are fine.

Loving the character interactions, especially Zolf and Cel bonding over Shoin’s bad design.

Bryn! Alex! That is an actual crime! Conspiracy to commit angst!

I love Zolf's growth!

I will need a transcription of this scene!

Cel was in war zones?

Speakers again

~~~

Hamid is humming opera music (Carmen?)

Scratch? Skraak has been marking the path when Hamid didn't think of it. I love Skraak! Hamid dear, when you get a moment, I know there's a lot on your mind: double check on Skraak's name and pronouns would ya? Also Hamid is doing awesome with the changes. I had faith in him but its great hearing him cheerfully ask Skraak for input as a local expert; instead of trying to force the pattern that worked before even as Skraak gets less kid like. Love to see how this shakes out, even though I confess Hamid having a new younger sibling was a treat. OK enough tangent let's open a hatch!

Oh pressure gauge! I wonder if that helps with more than flooding.

Wrench! I love a call back.

That's one way to refer to Hamid's abilities. Also I am aware of Zolf and Hamid's dwindling spell slots; I am just convincing myself they will be able to camp for the night in a safe hallway before Alex Shoin happens.

Oh good something is maintained around here.

Green light? Alex, did you come up with the hidden doors purely to mess with theoretical maps? Because Babs has been doing pretty well so far but I'll be her second if she challenges Alex to a fight in the parking lot after this episode.

~~~Break time, no ad is surprisingly weird, on edit listen is an ad with Mike that proves once again that I am so far gone on RQ that I even find the ads charming~~~

Oh more Hamid time!

That was a lot of dice, no numbers that I caught. Oh dear! (Was that Ben teasing him?)

In the rafters of a very large room. Huge domed ceiling, sounds pretty. Have I gone 20 minutes without saying how much I love Alex's set design? Thank you Ben, I will google it, *sticks out tongue*. Seriously as long as you enunciate and don't get into stuff so niche you lose people in England too, then don't worry about us from the US. Honestly you guys worry about everything, the occasional missed reference isn't worth the brainspace.

Still not happy about the lack of maintenance, especially given that's what stands between the party and drowning

Skraak sounds worried: it is his first time down this far and sounding more himself by the second. Still no hint of second guessing throwing in with Hamid! As good as Bryn is at avoiding spoilers, I thought he wouldn't have brought up Cohort on the discord if Skraak took it really badly as they sobered up, but is still a relief. Not that I would blame Skraak for much short of turning out to be the secret Big Bad: the circumstances were pretty messed up; even if I stand by saying you can't leave someone who pledged to you and isn't in a position to cover that up if their old boss catches them. Yes I know a conversation about spiders not being the most dangerous thing the party used on Kobolds is coming but with Skraak not turning out to be a kid, it might be more tense but cut my concerns in half. Hell the Kobolds might well be able to fend for themselves post Shoin if they loot the place in compensation.

"I still think that might be an exaggeration"

Oh Hamid has the Elven cloak too. How do you wear two cloaks at once? And don't say you don't, Hamid is not losing 4 levels of dragon awesome (or however Pathfinder put it) in the middle of a dungeon.

Skraak remembers the health potion and doesn't mind being asked to hang back. Hamid arms Skraak with a injection spear. Has the canisters for it too. I may have underestimated him (or on the Doylist level this falls under reasonable retcon; then again I might just have missed Bryn saying he was pocketing this stuff because I thought he would run it by Zolf). *Shrugs* please keep a sample for testing, I have a pet theory I'd love to see tested.

Alex, just...thanks for using a tone of voice that made it completely clear you were joking

Skraak: Skraak avenger, death from above etc! Hamid: Remember, General Skraak Avenger! Hamid remembers what he said to Skraak whether they do or not! OK like I said I loved Hamid adopting Skraak as a new little brother but this new phase is a lot of fun if harder to quantify.

Oh the sleeves! The cloaks don't have to have much physical presence, do they? That makes sense. Sleeves and prestidigitation? Right after being so charming with Skraak? Hamid is in fine form

Alex is just feeling mischievous tonight, I like it.

An enormous pipe organ? I love Alex's set design. (also one day my brain will pull up the right person the first time when someone references Bill Nye or Bill Nighy but even with the Pirates context today is not that day)

I know, Ben, cosmetic or not its fricken awesome.

I don't like the pipes, I don't get the pipes, but I don't like them (that fine mesh better not imply there is something airborne in the complex)

Is it wrong that other than the more obviously ominous bits this sounds like a great place to live?

Chaise longue

Is this seriously set up for the party -wait... Did Hamid skip to the end of the maze with only Skraak for back up and no sleep!?! No reunion or camping scene first? Not even a spell restoring nap?!

Human IOD? ALEX, WHAT IS UP WITH THIS FIGURE? ITS SHOIN RIGHT? ITS GOTTA BE.

Don't listen to Ben, Alex will get you if you jump to conclusions. That's my dragon! Sneaky lad learned from Sasha!

~~~Of course he is switching to the party. Man has a sense of timing.

More party favors, daggers make my heart twinge

Azu takes Cel’s hand to guide them

Gonna light a torch? Or is Zolf keeping up his anti light thing.

Alex is simplifying things No Zolf is not throwing open the door. Oh thank hope, Zolf is lighting a torch. Pathfinder jokes

We like it too Alex!

I like the zone thing.

Cel, I adore you! Zolf just promised backstory! Get that down! And a miner/minor pun, these people are the best! Oh tin miner!

Lights! Golden bulkhead! Seriously where is this guy getting his money?

Azu spots a trap! Yes Alex, we respect your craft. Trip wire!

I love the boots

Oh Cel is clumsy, I hadn't actually noticed that.

Genre savvy Cel hulks out with bat wings! Claws! Fangs! HP goes up thank all the gods! (Azu lets go of their hand)

Ben needs to look up spells but Zolf is prepared Azu puts on the iron beard

They throw open the door!

~~~

Poor Bryn, stuck waiting for the next episode like us listeners to find out the results.

I've been re listening to some early episodes and I really missed the "byes". It's a silly sign off but I think that comfort with silly might be part of why I like it?

Re: the bloopers, it would have been a little funny if they did a “detect traps” and got knocked out like when Hamid tried detect magic in, was it Rome?

OK bottom line: Skraak is awesome; I still miss Sasha but at least Lydia can be a bat even if it isn’t cloak of the bat; Zolf came back better than ever and actually wants to have at least 2 real conversations; and Azu is a champ for doing so well despite her phobias (which are still taken seriously because Helen and RQ are friggen awesome). Fun and pulpy, that's how ya do it! Stakes from the sea floor to the stratosphere! Character moments! Sets that make Hollywood weep in jealousy!

Okay okay some people may be stressed out after that even though everyone ended up fighting fit, which is fair, ok? but physical peril? Just a roller coaster to me, I'll take it any day of the week and twice on Sundays!

[brokehorrorfan]

DVD Review: Chillers: The Complete Series

Chillers is a little-known thriller anthology television series that was originally produced under the title Mistress of Suspense in France and the UK, where it debuted in 1990. It adapts 12 short stories by Patricia Highsmith, whose works have also been made into Strangers on a Train, The Talented Mr. Ripley, and Carol, among others. Despite the author being American, the show feels quite European in its pacing and dryness.

Psycho star Anthony Perkins, fresh off of Psycho IV: The Beginning, serves as the host in segments that bookend each episode. As pitch-perfect as he is as Norman Bates, the actor lacks the charisma of similar emcees like Hitchcock on Alfred Hitchcock Presents and The Twilight Zone's Rod Serling. The monologues aren't as witty either, but Perkins serves his purpose, setting the tone and occasionally throwing in a pun.

Episodes filled an hour-long TV block, making them around 52 minutes a piece without commercials, but in most cases the show would have greatly benefited from a half-hour format. It's heavy on melodrama, although dry humor is implemented at times. The subject matter explores humanity's dark side, often involving death and centering on middle-aged characters. Given that every episode is based on Highsmith's work, it's pleasing to see that Chillers employed a relatively high ratio of female writers and directors for its time.

"The Cat Brought It In" is a curious choice for a first episode. Director Nessa Hyams (casting director on The Exorcist and Blazing Saddles) does a fine job, but it hinges on extremely dry humor accentuated by deadpan performances from its cast, including Edward Fox (The Day of the Jackal) and Bill Nighy (Underworld). The story kicks off with a cat bringing severed human fingers into an English countryside home. The family debates about how to deal with the situation, wanting to solve the mystery without drawing attention to themselves.

"Sauce for the Goose" is a stronger effort, reminiscent of something you'd find on Alfred Hitchcock Presents. Ian McShane (American Gods) stars as a suave lounge singer who stays with a middle-aged couple, only to have the wife be seduced by his charm, leading to an affair. Directed by Clare Peploe (Rough Magic), it's a bit slow moving in the first half, but it picks up in the latter portion when murder is introduced.

"Old Folks at Home," written by Gérard Brach (Repulsion), finds a yuppie couple adopting an underprivileged elderly husband and wife. The octogenarians seem sweet, if a bit eccentric, at first, but they becoming increasingly difficult to live with as they ignorantly take advantage of their hosts' good nature. They're never sinister, but rather irritating.

"The Thrill Seeker" follows an otherwise mundane man (Jean-Pierre Bisson) with a most peculiar hobby: conning women - Marisa Berenson (Barry Lyndon) among them - into believing he's a far more impressive personality, like a film producer, mercenary, or author. He's not in it for particularly nefarious reasons, but he does steal a memento from each "victim." Bisson relishes the opportunity to play such a variety of characters, chewing the scenery as some and going subtle as others. The episode is not an entirely successful drama, as it spreads itself thin between playing the concept for laughs, exploring the tragic reality, and making it a thriller.

"The Day of Reckoning" is the most unconventional and, sadly, weakest entry. Samuel Fuller (Shock Corridor) directs this bizarre blend of absurdist comedy and over-the-top melodrama, in which a young man learns the dangers of life on a chicken farm. Many of Chillers episodes feel stretched out to fill the time slot, but this one really struggles, as evidenced with the abundance of chicken B-roll accompanied by on-the-noise music cues implying they're evil.

"Puzzle" follows a man (Stéphane Freiss) who's told that he could receive a big promotion if he's married. The only problem is that he has two girlfriends who do not know abut one another, so he must choose before he gets caught. Like a classic sitcom scenario, it becomes increasingly difficult for him to keep up the charade. Unfortunately, the episode does little to rise above the familiar trope.

"Slowly, Slowly in the Wind" concerns a rivalry between neighbors; one a traditional family man (Jean-Pierre Cassel, Murder on the Orient Express), the other a shrewd businessman (James Fox, Sherlock Holmes). The conflict comes to a head when their children enter a romantic relationship. The plot is nothing particularly groundbreaking, but it's engaging enough.

"A Curious Suicide" is the most Hitchcockian of the bunch and, it should come as no surprise, one of the best. In it, John (Richard Atkin) goes to visit a college friend (Barry Foster, Frenzy) who stole the love of his life from him decades prior. John commits what appears to be the perfect murder early in the episode, leaving the rest of the runtime to see if he's able to get away with the crime. Robert Bierman (Vampire's Kiss) directs from a script by Evan Jones (Victory).

"A Bird Poised to Fly" stars Paul Rhys (Chaplin) as a jilted lover who becomes increasingly infatuated with his muse. Fantasies spiral into obsession as his love letters go unreturned. The piece shows shades of Fatal Attraction, but writer/director Damian Harris (Deceived) and writer Nick Villiers (Blood and Wine) opt for a more dramatic character study that isn't nearly as exciting.

"The Stuff of Madness" is directed by Mai Zetterling, better known in front of the camera as Helga from The Witches. Ian Holm (The Lord of the Rings) stars as a man whose wife collects her deceased pets as taxidermy. Meanwhile, he has a peculiar idiosyncrasy of his own: he fantasizes about a mannequin that reminds him of a long-gone mistress. It's sort of like a psychosexual take on that Seinfeld episode in which the gang finds a mannequin that looks just like Elaine.

"Under a Dark Angel’s Eye" is perhaps the most horror-leaning episode, which naturally plays to my tastes. Ian Richardson (From Hell) stars as a man who returns to England after a decade away to oversee the sale of his childhood home. While there, he checks up on his old friends - played by Peter Vaughan (Straw Dogs) and Anna Massey (Peeping Tom) - who look after his overbearing, hateful mother who still haunts him. There's no murder in this one, but it's a dark tale of karma and guilt.

"Something You Have to Live With" ends the series on a fairly strong note. Jessica's (Tuesday Weld, Once Upon a Time in America) dream home turns out to be a nightmare when she kills a robber that breaks into her house. Director John Berry (The Bad News Bears Go to Japan) focuses on the aftermath as the unfortunate incident weighs heavily on her conscience.

Chillers, like any anthology, is hit and miss depending on the episode. It warrants a recommendation for fans of European fare, but don't expect it to compare to the more successful anthologies of yesteryear. Mill Creek Entertainment's new DVD set of the complete series crams all 12 episodes onto two discs. (An out-of-print 2005 release by Echo Bridge Entertainment had three DVDs.) Between the old, standard definition transfers and over five hours of content on each disc, the quality isn't great, but it's watchable.

Chillers: The Complete 12-Part Anthology Series is available now on DVD via Mill Creek Entertainment.

[thetygre]

30 Day Monster Challenge 2 - Day #5: Favorite Fish-Man

1.)    Abe Sapien (BPRD)

Good old Abraham Sapien. Been with us since the fist arc of Hellboy. Abe’s come a long way since then; met his mom, found his wife, subsequently lost her, reunited with his old steampunk buddies, got elected as antichrist after Hellboy and Liz, went into a coma, mutated a couple of feet taller, and so and so on. Into Abe is thrown a lot of bigger themes that inform us of the Mignolaverse’s overall composure. On the aesthetic side, Abe always brings the ocean, fish, and water with him. Lovecraft’s fear of the ocean, Verne’s fascination, and Melville’s awe of it are all wrapped up in Abe Sapien. In his past life, he even came from a whaling family, and he was part of a secret society of ocean-worshiping spiritualists. That’s the other aesthetic cue in Abe; Victoriana. Even when in body armor and running across the flooded remains of the Gulf Coast, Abe never loses a certain gentility. But as a character theme, more than anything, I think Abe represents tragedy. He’s lost more than anyone; Even Liz can still say she has her humanity. Abe can’t even remember his past life, and now he’s becoming a little more monstrous every day.

But through all that, Abe is still maybe the most relatable member of the BPRD for me. (Well, the superpowered ones anyway.) Abe isn’t really sure of who he is or his place in the world, and he’s still looking for those connections that root a person. At the same time, Abe sticks to the middle of the road, acting as the voice of reason even in unreasonable circumstances. He’s capable of emotional outbursts and faults, but for the most part, Abe succeeds at being a good person. Abe might be the strangest core member of the BPRD, but that he’s never inhuman. We don’t need to be super heroes; just basically good people are enough to keep the world running.

2.)    Davy Jones (Pirates of the Caribbean)

Man, I just love how cool this guy is. Sea monster octopus pirate; that’s a character description that makes my inner ten year old want to jump and down. Davy Jones’ whole character design is just so nifty; tentacle beard, organic peg-leg, crab-claw hook hand, a sweet pipe and a giant hat. Hat’s also important for the other reason I love Jones; plays into so many mythical archetypes. Costumers for PotC explicitly stated they picked Jones’ hat because it looked like horns, and they really wanted Jones to fit his role as essentially the pirate devil. As the PotC spans out, Jones is revealed to have been even more legendary characters; he’s the Old Man of the Sea that Odysseus had to wrestle to go to Hades, and Charon guiding souls over to the underworld. I’ll be honest, Davy Jones’ pathos with the lost love never really struck a chord with me. Bill Nighy’s performance of it was great, though, so props are definitely in order for that. And last, but certainly not least, I can’t not love a man who keeps a kraken as a pet.

3.)    Deep Ones (H.P. Lovecraft)

The classic. The first. Your one and only. It’s beginning to look a lot like fish-men. The blue-collar workers of the Cthulhu Mythos. H.P. Lovecraft’s fear of the ocean and corrupted bloodlines all wrapped into one beautiful, horrible fish creature. Nothing quite beats Lovecraft’s originals; he goes out of his way to describe them as alien, foul, and horrible. They’re another one of those monsters you can practically smell through the pages. I think it’s safe to say that half the other fish-men on this list wouldn’t exist without the Deep Ones. People are still scared of the ocean and the alien things living in it, and the Deep Ones give that fear a face. All the while they call to some primal part of us, an archaic memory that remembers when our species used to be fish, and they tell us to come home. Just as angels call us to come to God, the Deep Ones call us back to the sea. (Also; fat and hunchbacked Deep Ones only. I’m sorry; I wish I didn’t have to make that call. If it was up to me, all Deep Ones would be valid. But these are the times we live in, and sacrifices have to be made, preferably to Father Dagon.)

4.)    The Creature from the Black Lagoon (Universal Monsters)

Deep Ones lite. There’s actually a lot I like about the Creature on its own merits. It’s such a natural creature, as far as monsters go. It lives in harmony with its ecosystem, and its design really conveys that its simply a fish that has evolved into a humanoid shape. You can say the same thing about humans, though, and that ultimately is where we connect with the Creature. He’s also kind of charming in his own way; wide eyes, smiling face, no big pointy teeth. He’s practically a goldfish compared to the Deep Ones. And of course those underwater ballet sequences are still just absolutely beautiful. I think more than the Deep Ones, the Creature can probably be compared to King Kong; a primal, more innocent creature so strange that humanity wouldn’t leave it alone. Mankind’s desire to know more about the mysterious ultimately destroyed that mystery, conveying the paradox of how destructive discovery can be.

5.)    The Asset (Shape of Water)

We’ve come full circle now, I suppose. Centuries ago, sailors dreamed up half women/half fish creatures to ease their loneliness, and now we’ve made a half man/half fish to do the same for women. The Asset is pretty explicitly a makeover of the Creature from the Black Lagoon, even coming from a distant part of South America. There’s also clearly some Abe Sapien in there, which is only to be expected coming from Guillermo del Toro. This might sound weird, but I think the details I appreciate most are the spines and the fangs. I know this whole movie was supposed to be about how the monster was less dangerous than the Creature, but the spines and fangs just make it feel like a more believable creature.

6.)    The Creature (Monster Squad)

But before the asset, there was another Creature from the Black Lagoon reboot in The Monster Squad. This movie is just the gift that keeps on giving. I’d say that the Creature here is the strongest individual design out of the whole batch. He didn’t really do much in this movie, but he made one heck of an impression. Designed by none other than the late, great Stan Winston, this version of the Creature looks like its ready to kick ass and take names. I distinctly get the impression of a piranha from it, and you can just imagine a mob of these guys rising up out of the Amazon and pulling down a river boat.

7.)    Sahuagin (Dungeons and Dragons)

There are a lot of different fish people to choose from in D&D. Kuo Toa, Skum, Locathah, mermaids, Atlanteans, and the list grow longer every year. But my personal favorite are the Sahuagin; brutal, murderous raiders living in a strict tribal hierarchy, worshiping a giant shark, and prone to mutations. While most fish men draw from Lovecraft, I got the distinct impression that the Sahuagin were more pulpy, a bit more Edgar Rice Burroughs. Even their other name, the Sea Devils, sounds like something Conan or Tarzan would fight in a comic book. Their designs are just so cool; fin ears, bullet heads, shark teeth, long tails. Before ‘scary’, these were sea monsters made to look intimidating. They are the most organized antagonistic force under the waves, threatening everything from merfolk to sailors. Their goal? Nothing short of supreme domination of the sea.

8.)    Shark Giant (Bloodborne)

Another Deep One descendent, and this one hits like a truck. There’s a lot to be said for the shark giant on its own merits. It’s lack of eyes make you think that it senses by scent, and remind you of how a shark can sense a drop of blood in water a hundred miles away. There are, of course, the teeth, and how they seem to take up more space than there is for the mouth. The barnacles on its back are both a crest and a fin. Its paleness makes it seem to glow in the dark, like its bioluminescent. It really reinforces the feeling in the Fishing Hamlet that you’re underwater, like the boundaries between land, sea, and sky have been blurred. More than any other monster in the Fishing Hamlet, the shark giant is what reminds me of Lovecraft’s Dagon; a huge, deformed figure skulking over the mud of a submarine nightmare-scape.

9.)    The Children of the Thing That Drifted Ashore (Junji Ito)

The Thing That Drifted Ashore isn’t even really my favorite Junji Ito sea monster story; that would probably be Gyo. But the things that come crawling out of it are some of the first fish people I find genuinely disgusting, evoking that same feeling Lovecraft wanted from his Deep Ones. The Thing had apparently swallowed dozens of people that fell into the sea over the years, keeping them in its stomach. But rather than being digested, the people changed. It’s subtle, but you can still see it; webbed fingers, widened eyes, transparent skin. Inside the Thing, the people were witnesses to the abyss of the deep sea and driven mad by it. I’m reminded of an old version of the story of Jonah I was read as a child, where Jonah looked through the great fish’s eyes and saw the fires of Sheol and the Leviathan at the bottom of the ocean. The people swallowed are reborn, now children of the Thing, belonging only to the deep sea.

10.)    Otto Aquarius (The Venture Bros)

I just love this cute little guy. He’s only a minor character on the Venture Brothers, but he still made an impression on me. A half Atlantean that became a Mormon missionary, he’s just so earnest and eager. He’s an obvious play on superheroes like Namor and Aquaman, but they can’t hold a candle to this sweetheart. He’s clean, he’s polite, he’s socially conservative, he’s useless in combat; Otto’s just endearing. Dump the Asset and get with the real catch, folks.

[adamwatchesmovies]

The Bookshop (2017)

While watching The Bookshop, I went back-and-forth on it. For a while, I wondered where the story was going. At other points, I became ensnared. Looking back, I think I might’ve enjoyed mentally extrapolating on the picture’s themes more than what actually happened on-screen, but that’s worth something, right?

Set in 1959, middle-aged widow Florence Green (Emily Mortimer) is determined to follow her dream and open a bookshop. Through many sacrifices, she opens the business but finds that a woman she has unwillingly vexed, Mrs. Gamart (Patricia Clarkson), is determined to run her out of town and turn the bookshop into an arts center.

The central conflict of this picture only comes in at least be halfway through. When Mrs. Gamart bends her influence in the community, riches, and wickedness towards Florence and her bookshop, you’ll be glued to the screen. Patricia Clarkson’s so good in a role of this woman who smears this veneer of philanthropy and kindness all over her wicked form you want to leap into the screen Last Action Hero-style and take a cheese grater to her skull until nothing but a bowl of red pulp is left. In their battle, I saw an allegory for big businesses and the way they encroach on ordinary people who want to live simple lives and pursue their passions but are stomped underfoot by supervillains who may donate funds to charities but really don't care about people. Maybe I’m the only one who’ll see this but I doubt their duel will leave you unaffected.

Until we get to that point, the film meanders. We’re introduced to a number of characters who are given quirks and backstories that make them feel real in that 1959 small town sort of way but could’ve easily been removed without much loss. Bill Nighy as Edmund Brundish, the hermit who loves books but hates people so he burns any covers which have a picture of the authors on them? He’s got some nice scenes but the picture isn’t about him and he feels included solely because he was in the novel this film is based on. Similarly, there’s a narration that bookends the front and back of the film. Why? Probably because it was there in the original work. It doesn’t sound like much but the extraneous elements inflate the running time to nearly 2 hours.

I can’t highly recommend The Bookshop because of its front end. It’s just too slow and aimless for too long. That second half, however, really engaged me. I was outraged and infuriated. It made me feel things and made me think. That emotional response means it’ll stick with me and if you have the patience for the whole package, the performances from the two opponents are enough for me to give the picture a mild thumbs up. (Theatrical version on the big screen, September 2, 2018)

[witty-diagnosis]

Witty Review #30: Detective Peek at you

Hey up guys been around 2 weeks since the last review so to make sure none of you leave I thought I’d spew out a toxic deluge of a review. Now recently with uni finishing I’ve had significantly more time to indulge in movie watching, including for around a month thanks to McDonald’s monopoly having a Now TV pass for a month and a few visits to the cinema. My second most recent visit included a trip to see Detective Pikachu, so lets chat about it.

So directed by Rob Letterman who also directed masterpieces of modern art such as Shark Tale, Gulliver's Travels and Goosebumps this is by far his best movie. Based on the 2016 video game of the same name, which honestly really surprised me because it wasn’t an absolutely huge release of a game. But honestly it’s the perfect pokemon game for a movie, the regular pokemon games are all a bit too childish so a game such as detective pikachu presents the perfect chance for adaptation and they really capitalised on this. But based on what I said it is of course based on the famed Digimon franchise. Starring Justice Smith, Ryan Reynolds and Kathryn Newton with support from Bill Nighy and Ken Watanabe. And honestly it’s a really good performance from Justice Smith, considering he isn’t really well known as an actor a lot of his scenes bring genuine emotion, especially when he talks about his dad. And Ryan Reynolds is as always really good, not phoning this one in like many suspected he might do, and with his usual energy he makes a really good, and obviously very marketable main character in Pikachu. 

Now the main part, that everyone wants to talk about... The fact insurance companies exist in the Pokemon world. They must have to pay a premium to have insurance when fighting with these possibly deadly monsters. Now the actual big bit, the pokemon being made into CGI, and honestly for most of them it really works. Pikachu looks amazing, the scenes with Mr. Mime are pretty funny, while also really showing off a lot of detail, he has dodge ball shoulders. The Greninja chase is cool, and just all the little details and pokemon they managed to fit in is really impressive, and seeing how they might look is really cool. Of course apart from gengar, he needs to be more round, he’s a fat boi not an oblong boi that’s why I love him.But other than that, and how they did a really weird plot point with like one character mind controlling Mewtwo and his voice coming out his mouth just being strange it’s a really good film, and enjoyable for everyone, kid’s will love pokemon and adults will enjoy the plot and what new sort of things we learn about the pokemon world seeing it in this whole new dimension, like the ones with fur and what certain attacks are and how big and feared a gyarados is and alsothe pokemon, because you’re never too old for the Pikachu. Although ignore the fact one of the characters kind of implies he ‘evolved’ himself he cured cancer. which is a little weird in a kids movie.

And the music, oh the recreations of classic battle music is awesome, we get mewtwo’s battle music, we get the classic battle theme and of course we get Ryan Reynolds Pikachu singing the theme song to the entire franchise while crying, a scene I’m sure we’ve all imagined. 

So overall yeah this movie is pretty good, I’d recommend it with your mates, by yourself, with your family and kids, it’s a really enjoyable film for any situation and you can look for the deeper details or you can enjoy the superficial fact ‘pokemon look real now’ and that we get like a middle aged pokemon trainer and the peer pressure faced to leave home and get a pokemon partner, which I mean why not it’s a little creature that can shoot flames and shit, and some are god damn cute. but apart from the weird implied cancer cure and the Mewtwo bit it gets an 8/10, I’d recommend you go see this.

Hope you guys enjoyed, my next review will be on another cinema trip movie, John Wick 3, so I’ll see you guys later this week.