#or worse just straight up fakeclaim us

[sysmedsaresexist]

when i was first experiencing identity crisises, i went to inclusive system communities (as in including endo systems) because i thought i was a system (i'm not) and honestly it made things wayyy worse. i was often encouraged to separate my identity even further, which i did, and i ended up feeling more confused and mentally ill than i was before. i straight up had weird, depersonilization moments because of it.

idk what my point is here i just wanted to ramble a bit. and i'm curious if anyone had similar experiences.

🙋 Me! I had a similar experience! I’m diagnosed DID but before that, the online communities misled me to think I was an endogenic system and that I shouldn’t talk to a therapist about my symptoms. Long story short, I ended up having a psychotic break and nearly ending up in the hospital.

I'm so sorry that the community hurt you in this way. It's not okay. It's been a huge problem in the system community for as long as I've known it -- it's a professionally acknowledged problem, actually...

Unfortunately, I've met way too many people who have been misled by the online community (inclusive and exclusive spaces). I know personally just how horrible it can be to find a space that you think is safe and healthy for you only to end up misinformed or worsening your mental health. It’s even harder when you don’t realize you’re being hurt until much later.

I wish I had a single, clear-cut answer for this but I don't. I think that there needs to be more awareness and acceptance of dissociation and trauma. There needs to be more professional-led education and resources available to the public. There needs to be less discourse, stigma, and fakeclaiming (because that shit helps NO ONE). I hope we can continue to encourage the online system community to be more careful and understanding. We cannot ignore that there are often people with very serious mental health problems in our midst. Plurality can be a very helpful framework for some people, but it can also be a very harmful framework for others. Some people are wrong about things in their system, or even wrong about being a system at all, and that's okay.

I hope you’re getting the right kind of help you need now, anon. Let us know if you need any help finding resources!

[sophieinwonderland]

As a traumagenic, what is up with anti endo's? Even if you put aside their ableist rhetoric and all of the awful things, they're just straight up annoying. Can't say anything without them taking it out of context or exaggerating it. Syscourse could be about educating the masses, but instead it's an internal conflict because anti endos keel dragging everyone else down into their petty arguments and respectability politics

Yes! They're so annoying!

"Syscourse could be about educating the masses"

One thing I've realized is that a lot of them really don't want that.

Like, I've seen anti-endos asked about writing DID characters, and their response has been to not do it. And in a way, I get not wanting to risk bad or harmful representation. But I think when there is so much bad representation out there, helping writers who are interested do better will let you have a chance to change those perceptions.

But change is scary.

We live in a world that's harmful to systems right now but it's a world we're comfortable in. Especially older generations of plurals.

It's the devil we know.

Educating the masses means putting ourselves out there. And it means an uncomfortable spotlight being shown on systemhood.

I think a lot of anti-endos are scared of a plural rights movement.

And maybe they should be.

Because the dark side to it is that, as bad as pluralphobia is today, awareness and fighting for plural right may incur challenge and opposition.

Invisibility is bad. A medical system that ignores us is bad. Being fakeclaimed and harassed by cringe subreddits is bad.

We shouldn't have to settle for a status quo where headmates have to mask and pretend to be someone else for our whole lives.

But the pluralphobia we face is largely covert today. We don't have to deal with systems being ripped apart on national TV by people like Sean Hannity.

And I cannot promise that a fight for plural acceptance won't make things worse before they get better.

I think, whether they realize it or not, a lot of the reason anti-endos want to keep syscourse completely internal to the plural community is this fear of the unknown.

They don't want to educate the masses. They don't want plural awareness.

They're comfortable being big fish in a small pond because the ocean is deep and dark and dangerous.

But the status quo isn't good enough and I think fighting to make things better for plurals is worth the risk.

[system-vent]

one of the nastiest nastiest feelings is taking our shirt off and its not even because the body is human and afab and im a tabaxi tiger and amab, i have accepted that and i can look past it. i can cope with that, it doesnt bother me or any hosts or ex-hosts. what bothers me is the scars on our arm that come from a very harmful frequent fonter we had because i KNOW that the scars from him were preventable. i know we couldve stopped him. why the hell didnt we stop him from doing any of that? if we had known he had bad intentions and was doing all those bad things on purpose we wouldnt have let him front but he kept saying he was trying, he would be better, hes just anxious, hes depressed, he has bpd. so do the rest of us the body has those disorders you dont see me causing half the shit he did?? i hate him.

seperate rant/ramble: as i was typing this i heard either coyotes screaming outside, or i had an auditory hallucination. i hate this body and it's schizophrenia for a multitude of reasons which sends me on a new tangent ☝️🤓 i hate having schizophrenia because its often misdiagnosed as did (/srs) and we go "ohhh but maybe im faaaaking" i can garuntee you that the disassociative amnesia regarding our childhood may be a sign! and the very obvious shifts of personality, and also earlier today i had a fleeting thought that was something i wouldnt think and i thought it in the voice of one of my headmates. lo and behold he fronted without my noticing and neither of us know how long he was in front for.

on another note i hate hate hate having to self disgnose. our mother gets aggravated and has a borderline mental breakdown every single time one of us asks her why she thinks we are not autistic because to us and to other people with autism it is BLINDINGLY obvious, just as an example of why we need to self disgnose this much. schizophrenia, adhd, depression, anxiety, and various physical issues are all things we have been diagnosed with. we suspect autism, bpd, aspd, did, and dyslexia. we did not think about any of these disorders or about having them, and we knew nothing about them until friends with said disorders would talk about their experiences and vent about it and we went "oh no... oh no..." and then we had to go do vast amounts of research into them and overlapping disorders and just. so much research. and the autism part takes EVERYTHING literally and at face value so very often we will go "oh this cant be us! we dont have every single symptom!" and it is, in fact, us. we also fakeclaim ourselves when we hear stories about how bad these disorders can be and ours is never that bad. its bad enough to actually genuinely impact our life more often than not and the symptoms are very distressing when we notice them, but they arent as bad as they could be which to a lot of my headmates makes it very obvious that we do not have the disorders we very much do. it causes a lot of denial towards ourselves, we had looked into dyslexia and joking about having it for months but we never flat out said we have dyslexia until one of our managers straight up told someone "yeah we're dyslexic this losers are just in denial because we can send messages that are coherent. they think we are not dyslexic because we go back and correct any typos? doesnt make sense to me. the typos are still made, and we still miss a lot of words we need to correct very often. oh yes im aware theyre idiots." sometimes fakeclaimer logic is just so broken. we also have a lot of alters that have dyslexia in source memories and whenever they fromt our typing gets much worse which obviously means we don't actually have dyslexia OR did! /sarc. DID truely stands for dumb idiot disorder because i could spend a week listing times when our symptoms for all our disorders were very very prominant.

.

[the-scintillant-sys-sideblog]

dude me and the other main fronter at the moment (cal) primarily having the same source in a roleplay with friends is funny but also sometimes the worst thing in the world because oh my god sometimes we will read/hear things that make us both wildly uncomfortable and neither of us wanna do much after that which is something because usually i'm the one helping her after shit like that

talking about it in more detail under the cut because i'm mostly just ??? about it and also both of us are gonna explode about it still (we tried talking/venting about it not in explicit detail but like our friends kinda left us on read so </3) but like under a keep reading so you don't Have to read our bitching about it because it's a lot of bitching jhgfds

okay so like cal is romance repulsed and a fictive of an oc we're using in this roleplay right. and i'm also a fictive of a friend's oc who also happens to be in said roleplay which i just don't care about telling anyone who i'm a fictive of personally so i don't unless they ask in private because that's what everyone else in the system prefers right. okay can you imagine how well both of us feel when cal feels like the roleplay gets too romance centric sometimes that sets off the romance repulsion And jokes start getting made about my source character being gay with another guy who i just did Not view that way not once

like we were in a vc on discord with friends when it happened and i um. ough it did not feel good man but we Could Not just say we felt physically ill at that point because of the jokes so we could leave the vc so we just. stayed there in silence until we were done drawing and just. left. it isn't the first time it happened it happened one other time yesterday for a bit and it was. a battle to not explode or anything mostly for cal but like. ughh i don't like feeling like this

for me i arguably should be more uncomfortable about it bc it's about me but like!! not my right to police how my friends talk about my source i guess. i mostly just don't wanna to overhear it when in a vc with friends because even if it's jokes i did nnnoooot like that guy in any way other than a platonic one can we not in front of the literal fictive of one of the guys we're joking about please i don't care if you do it otherwise just don't do it when i'm Right There :| (they literally do not know i am a fictive of him because i'm more worried if they'll be weird about it or not since i don't want our system potentially getting fakeclaimed even if our friends are the better ones we've made in a while)

and for cal it's like. very much romance repulsion because sometimes the constant jokes about romance and stuff (and yes even when it's not straight romance). it Does get to it sometimes and it's been harder because the current roleplay we're doing has felt so...much more centered around romance in terms of plot or what most people are more focused on and while cal will keep her criticisms to herself it's very. hard to for them stay engaged with certain it for that reason if that makes sense?? and normally she can put up with it by muting a discord channel and ignoring it however i think specifically jokes about my source self Get To Her now too at this point. like yes part of it is related to the fact that we are in a weird sorta insys relationship (...if you can call it that we don't really but it helps get the point across) so they're very. possessive/jealous about things sometimes including source stuff and she doesn't mean to be like that and is typically able to separate it enough but like it still makes her Not enjoy those jokes and the added romance repulsion makes it arguably worse i think

like i should arguably be more upset about it and cal less so but like emotions are weird. but like either way we Want to try and talk about it sometimes like cal's literally mentioned they're romance repulsed to people in reference of the "things feel way too centered around romance" point sorta and we tried talking to friends about our feelings about this if not very vaguely but. even if they say they're not gonna judge and already are nice about us being a system idk i don't really trust that after we tried being a bit more open about being a system with fictives and just. no one responded even though we know damn well they were up wayyy past when we posted that :| like i wanna have faith in these people to be nice about our system and maybe even let the others be comfortable enough so i can just use my name outside of our personal discord server and i know that they aren't obligated to respond to shit they don't want to and that system topics can be awkward for singlets but. damn yall aren't helping your case especially when you've been friends with the collective system for almost two years now! maybe cal was kinda right! i wanna be nice and believe in better outcomes but christ do singlets just. not realise that when we're talking about being a system openly to them it means we collectively trust them enough to not be dicks about it and even moreso when we bring up our fictives . like not obligated to respond obviously but i'll be real if we bring up shit about being a system and our fictives when you know we rarely ever do that i think you should at least acknowledge that you read it since we're willing to be THAT open with you but what do i know

idk man i'm just. tired and want these jokes to be more mindful mostly just for cal's sake because i also have to feel the physical illness when she gets like that and i don't want to. throw up on vc lmao but also while i legitimately don't care as much as i probably should i dooon't wanna hear jokes about source me being romantically interested in someone i did not like in that way even if it's not canon to the roleplay in the first place if it can be helped :| (at least i really hope it's not canonical for cal's sake because i genuinely think she would lose it at that point and i don't think any amount of comfort i can try giving it would help)

[pluraladvice]

hello!! we have two questions, if thats okay: (if you dont want to answer either of these or one of these thats fine!! any advice is appreciated /gen) -is it possible for a headmate to create another headmate from them being hyperfixated on the character + thinking about the character a lot + wanting a fictive of a character? our horror sans fictive watched a lot of underverse and other au stuff, decided she wanted a fresh sans fictive because she finds fresh sans hilarious, and thought about them so much yesterday i got the intense urge to draw them for a few hours despite not being an undertale fan myself, and i felt an intense...prescence? i suppose, and now this morning fresh is actually talking to us. -if that is possible, how do you deal with being fakeclaimed for it? to keep things as short as possible, i get anxious very easily and getting fakeclaimed would make that really bad, and my fear of that has made this situation a bit worse. i dont think it would happen, but if it did i would like to be prepared for it.

thank you so much!! ^_^ -Basil

Yes that is very much possible. Other headmates can split other headmates or can cause walk ins or can cause spiritual connections! It happens often and all the time!

As for fakeclaiming, unfortunately it does and will happen. There's always going to be places like systems cringe and their ilk who have no real knowledge on the matter but want to pretend that they do. The best you can do for yourself? Block. Block the tags, block antis, avoid the places you know will have those people. We purposefully don't post as a system on tiktok because majority of systems on tiktok are antis who just can't keep their mouths shut about it. Filter your comments. Use those things that social medias have given you to be able to curate your experience and curate it. Tumblr has a filter system, tiktok has a filter system for comments and I THINK they have a filter system for videos now too but I haven't used it yet tbh, idk about Twitter we straight up refuse to use Twitter period so that's something you would have to figure out on your own. When it does happen? Just block them. Don't engage. Don't even bother reading the full message. Just block them or delete the comment or both. They are not worth the time. They don't know you or your system and they certainly don't have the knowledge or understanding of systems and the like to say whether any of this is true. We've had four separate therapists and while we are traumagenic (as far as we're aware completely but could be only mostly as we're not 100% sure) that we've mentioned endogenic systems to just talking about antis and complaining and they all have am agreement that other people do not get to decide what is actually going on inside another person's head and the field of psychological study is entirely based on observation, rather than observation + testing that observation/theory based on said observation. You are the deciding factor in what is and is not happening to you. Not some random on the internet. Block them, filter the words you need to, stay away from the community areas that you know they thrive in. Those are the best things you can do.

[caffeinatedopossum]

The DID urge to make funnies by placing my alters into alignment chart memes

[juicebox-sys]

hey um we're a system with unknown origins and we're finding it hard to navigate the interwebs with all of the gatekeeping and fakeclaiming and anti-endo stuff so 2 things 1) are u a sysmed or something and 2) how in the heck do we navigate any of this without getting stressed over f*keclaiming for not knowing if we're traumagenic/what that trauma is

First off, if you ever use the term "sysmed" at me again, anon privileges are getting revoked. That term was appropriated from trans culture and y'all have absolutely no right to use it the way you are. It comes from the word "transmed," short for "transmedicalist" which means a person who thinks that if, for any reason at all you cannot or will not fully medically transition, you are not trans. They treat transness as a disease or disorder, which it is not, and it has caused real world harm. People were harassed, doxxed, sent death threats, and some have even committed suicide.

"Sysmed" means someone who thinks systems form from trauma, and I have looked and found absolutely no sources credible that say systems can form without trauma.

With our current understanding of how systems form, you cannot be a system without trauma. Maybe one day that will change, there still isn't a lot of research on systems. Maybe one day there will be multiple credible sources out there that say this can happen, but as of right now there aren't and I am inclined to believe the science.

On the day when multiple research studies have been done and peer reviewed and published officially and all of that good shit, then I will believe that systems without trauma can exist.

Until then, I really don't give too much of a fuck about people calling themselves endogenic or mixed origin or whatever. It's not my life, I've got my own shit to deal with, so I mind my own business. Let them handle their shit, I really could not care less. If you call yourself endogenic or whatever and follow me, I'm not gonna get pissy, just don't drag fucking syscourse into my inbox.

Speaking of syscourse, in regards to your second question; stop engaging with syscourse. I promise your life will get so much easier.

Here's a dose of reality. Regardless of who you're talking to, singlet or system, traumagenic or endogenic, black or white, gay or straight - we're all just trying to live our lives and find a way for the world to make sense.

Syscourse is fucking stupid. Someone says they're endogenic? Okay, whatever, that doesn't affect me. Someone says persecutors are evil? Damn, they're a shitty person, I hope I never meet or talk to them. Someone says introjects aren't real? They're very uneducated, but it's not my job to educate them, and I'm hungry so I'm gonna grab something from McDonald's down the road.

I have never had any of these problems in the real world, and I know like 3 different systems IRL. That's a lot when you live in the ass crack of nowhere. They only exist online because people love to argue and fight and blow shit out of proportion, and that can make those problems seem way worse than they actually are.

I also recommend taking a step back from the Internet. That doesn't mean leave it completely, or forever, but just step back for a bit and think about you, your system, what being a system means to you, etc.

If you have decent communication within your system, have this conversation with them, too. You're part of a team now, a team whose goal is to keep everyone in your body safe, happy, and healthy. You may have different ideas on how to do that, and that's okay, but you need to talk that out between yourselves at some point, if and when you can.

It will be far easier to focus on yourself and your life if you stop giving a shit about things that don't matter in real life. There are far more pressing issues for systems in the real world then whether or not that alter is a protector or a caretaker. Have you ever tried looking up "DID in the workplace"? It's tips for therapists on how to deal with systems, not tips for systems on how to find and maintain a steady job.

There aren't many resources out there for systems right now. We don't have much, so we make do with what we have. The last thing we fucking need is to be arguing over shit that, again, does not fucking matter in the real world.

Any further syscourse shit in our inbox is getting deleted. I don't want to give it any more of my time than I already have.