#panics in passive aggression

[tiianwens]

𝐈𝐍𝐂𝐎𝐌𝐈𝐍𝐆: @xiianxias — YĪNG JIĀ

in the end, it's all yīng jiā's fault: being sick in the first place is a divine punishment, a sign from the heavens above that he must be a fundamentally flawed person --- because if he were good and worthy, he'd be rendered whole again; the fact that he hasn't been is a damning one. he should've known today was going to be a bad day --- he'd woken up drenched in sweat, was too nauseous to eat anything, and had gotten lightheaded even during his morning meditation. his chest is aching and burning, like something is trying to claw its way out of his lungs. yīng jiā holds a hand against the wall for support, vision clouding over with each shaky step he takes. it feels like he's dying. this time, he wonders if he really is. he tugs a bloodstained handkerchief from the sleeve of his robe and coughs into it, but this time, there's too much blood --- it soaks through the fabric and splatters down the front of his robes; in between fits of agonized coughing, he struggles to suck down even half a breath of air. the world tilts, and he steps wrong; with an uncharacteristically graceless stumble, he falls as if in slow motion, slumping on the ground. yīng jiā doubts his master is nearby; even so, to call out for him feels instinctual. after all, his master is the one who's going to teach him the cultivation techniques he needs to get better ... ! "shizun," he manages feebly. blood dribbles down his chin. he coughs again, and his vision nearly whites out. "shizun, please ... help me ... "

THE PRISTINE WHITES of his robes always shied away from the dirt and blood of worldly affairs — such is the nature of a man devoid of warmth, a wildfire raging without a spark. Disgusted at the thought of being stained, of being tainted, afraid of being too exposed, yet the gut-churning sound of such violent coughing adds vigor to his step. Chu Wanning allows it to get under his skin. He allows the words to pierce his heart. So similar to the gentle, childish voice from years ago, so vulnerable to trust. 'Shizun, please pay attention to me...'

So he lowers himself, catching the other in his arms. A glowing trail of spiritual energy flows through his fingers pressed against Yīng Jiā's chest to place a temporary seal and hold back the damage. White sleeves are so easy to stain, fresh crimson soaking through delicate fabric — there's not enough time to take out his own handkerchief, embroidered with a flower of haitang, and this amount of blood would never wash off completely, it would never–

His hands are shaking but his voice is cold. ❝ Breathe, ❞ it commands, and the glow of golden light still lingers, as soothing as he can muster, as gentle as his hands know how to be. Brows knit together, blade-sharp, nothing but collected hollowness and familiar disapproval behind his phoenix eyes — the healing spell is superficial, too weak to save a life but wilful enough to drain the life force of its caster until the flow of blood subsides. ❝ Focus on my voice and keep breathing, ❞ Chu Wanning instructs again, but with his chest pressed against the other's back, wouldn't the violence of his heart be too obvious? It's pitiful, almost, how he cannot find it in him to muster a gentler 'I'm here'. How he listens to the frantic, ragged breathing, a hand resting briefly upon the burning forehead. How he wishes to find a way to never see so much blood again.

❝ You shouldn't have exerted yourself this much, ❞ there must be a way, there has to be a way... ❝ Don't move, just breathe. I'll take you to your room when you're able to walk. ❞

[rynli]

me: I should write the one-shot that lives in my head about Harry applying for a job

brain: you will write a whole casefic about Harry realizing being a cop already killed him once, acab applies even to Kim, and he needs to quit if he wants to get better

[kazer-time]

My last #19 moments.

Hawks vs. Flyers, 4.13.23.

[arctic-hands]

My parents make better friends than they ever did spouses and like that was painfully obvious to me at age ten to the point I was pleading with god during my christian years by saying "I know divorce is a sin but I'll take the punishment if you let them divorce" but for whatever fucking reason they thought it was better for me to wait until I was eighteen to split and then they marvel at how all my romantic options just end up being friends and how lonely I am romantically

[widevibratobitch]

i hate my uni sm lol i dont want to be heeeeere let me out let me out

[unladyboss]

A SIMPLE SOLUTION TO THE PRE-ORDERS DEBACLE

I was reading this post from @eatandsleepwell

and it made so much sense. Carmy was the only one freaking out about the pre-orders and if he could have calmed down a little he'd have seen there was a simple solution. Given that they only had 8 minutes:

Turn off the pre-orders.

Cancel all extra orders they couldn't fullfil

Apologize to customers and thank them for their overwhelming response to the review

Computer glitch

Come back tomorrow and try the food (pre-orders would be off).

Customers won't mind and they'd try again because a place so busy means the food is good

But Carmy was mad because Syd didn't follow his instructions. He may have been a little jealous too.

He was probably also mad that he didn't call Syd out on not following his instructions about the dish.

He should have done that instead of telling her it was ok.

His freaking out made Sydney on edge. She started to act out of character yelling at Tina and kinda being a little vicious to Richie who everyone including Carmy can agree he 'probably f--kin deserved it'.)

Syd for her part was probably thinking she messed things up with Carmy. She just wanted to help and do a good job.

Her hero cussed and yelled at her.

That kinda thing guts you deep.

Carmy really has to learn different ways of dealing with stuff, because he just hurts the ones he loves

It's also irrational and probably alcohol feuled

[a-small-writer-in-a-big-world]

The Sunday scaries are really kicking my ass rn lol

[mxdam]

😁 & 😤

😁 — what’s your favorite part about being part of the rpc?

i've made a lot of wonderful friends here and had a LOT of fun. there's something very easygoing and freeform about rping here that's different from other platforms--which is a bit funny of me to say since the rpc tends to be a very rigid and high-strung community LOL. but the writing itself has a lot of room to move.

😤 — what do you dislike the most about being part of the rpc?

the social aspect of the community can be challenging for various reasons:

the simultaneous informality and formality of interactions on here (people being like "be my bestie! come heckin slam your nonsense in my diddly darn dms buckaroo!" but also having rules you MUST follow and subjects you CANNOT even ACCIDENTALLY broach and you have to memorize EVERYONE'S triggers even if you follow 100s of people or you get blocked)

herd mentality in terms of call outs, political discourse, what subjects are acceptable/unacceptable to write about (i mean like, "is it ok to write about abuse in a thoughtful and empathetic way" [yes] not "is it ok to rp the holocaust" [no not really]), people tend to resort to mantras and dogpiling vs. engaging critical thinking

general lack of meaningful communication, people expect you to pick up on hints and are reading into things as signals all the time. for example generally speaking there is very little direct "hi, can we do this?" and more "i'm going to make a post about this thing and IF the person i want to write it with likes that post, then i'll know"--certainly i've been guilty of it before and will be again lol but what a bad habit! same when you've offended or hurt someone and their reaction is silence, or worse, VAGUEING (christ this has happened to me so much) vs. "hey, you said X and it made me feel Y."

answering a munday meme on a chewsday

[anonymolly]

annoying that the family trauma makes me sexy but the sex trauma doesn’t. but whatever I guess

[rotturn]

every day on this trip is worse

[calamitydarcy]

someone i talked to maybe like 5 times just randomly messaged me being upset i haven't responded to them in a while and i panicked

[draygon-lord]

Vent

[stary-night]

.

Vent

[inflagrante-delicatessen]

one of my toxic traits is using 🙂 (casual) or :) (formal) for humor

[murmeloni]

I need more fanboy Clark Kent in my life.

Like, he's seen Bruce Wayne interact with a child once and immediately fell in love with the guy. Now his bedroom walls are plastered with posters and he follows several social media accounts focused on capturing pictures of Bruce with kids and/or animals etc. He defends Bruce to anyone, no matter the antics he gets up to and it has become a bit of a running gag around the office.

Then, one day, Cat is out sick and someone jokingly suggests Clark should cover the gala in her stead, seeing as Bruce Wayne will be there and maybe this'll be Clark's shot to finally get his man? To everyone's surprise, Perry really does assign the gala coverage to Clark, who spends the days leading up to the event in a state somewhere between absolute panic and ultimate bliss.

But when the day finally arrives, Bruce doesn't show.

Of course Clark does his job and interviews everyone there (yes, even Lex Luthor) but a part of him spends all night waiting for Bruce to crash the party late, like he so often does.

Eventually, Clark gives up hope and it's shortly after that, that he stumbles upon one of the children dragged along to the event by their parents. Because apparently someone thought a charity gala was a good environment for an eight year old. The parents are nowhere in sight and the child is close to tears, so Clark makes it his mission to cheer the little girl up, regaling her with stories from his upbringing on a Kansas farm while he searches the crowd for her family.

With Clark thus occupied, he doesn't notice Bruce Wayne finally making his appearance for the night. But Bruce definitely notices him. The gentle giant who's all kind smiles and corny jokes... Until he finds the girl's parents. Uncaring of the fact that he's here on a job and that these people are richer than any one person should be and could easily sue him into oblivion, he takes them aside, fire in his eyes, and tears them a new one for losing track of their kid like this. Anything could have happened to her and maybe the readers of the Daily Planet would like to know about that? After all, how reliable and trustworthy could a company whose CEOs won't even look after their own daughter really be?

Bruce is immediately smitten. The passive-aggressive lecture and subtle threats - not to mention the broad shoulders and handsome face - are incredibly attractive to him and he wastes no time cornering the man afterwards.

Clark, who is so starstruck by the mere sight of Bruce coming towards him that he loses the ability to speak, nearly faints when Bruce just straight up shoves his tongue into his mouth. They end up in one of the coat rooms and Clark thinks that's it, just a one night stand. It sucks that he won't see Bruce again, but the night was amazing and at least he has the memory to treasure, right?

He thinks that right up until he gets to work the next day and two dozen red roses are waiting for him on his desk. There's a handwritten card nestled inbetween the petals and on it is the name of a restaurant along with a date and time. It's signed by Bruce.

And that is how Clark gets together with his celebrity crush.

[sunflowercandie]

I'm tired of worrying about what people think of me I'm tired of worrying about what people think of me I'm tired of worrying about what people think of me I'm tired of worrying about what people think of me I'm tired of worrying about what people think of me I'm tired of worrying about what people think of me I'm tired of worrying about what people think of me I'm tired of worrying about what people think of me I'm tired