I need to...
Enjoy my Summer I.
MASTERLIST
Summary: You start off your summer in Dorne, with your girl best friend and your godmother
Pairings: Cregan Stark x Fem!Reader, Jacaerys Velaryon x Sara Snow
Warnings: cursing, horny people, PDA, teasing, fears of cheating, discussion about cheating, all in good fun, might miss some warnings, you know what this is about jeje
Wordcount: 4,4 k
Notes:I can't apologise enough for the delay to this! I had most of the next chapter and nothing on this one! jeje I had a HUGE block... and eventually, I managed... but I feel like there is nothing intense on this chapter, but still... I hope you all liked this!
“Cregan! Jace! Look who we run into!”, you said excitedly into the back camera of your phone. Jace and Cregan’s mouth opened widely when they saw who you were with
“Hello, I’m Oberyn Martell and this is for these lovely ladies’ boyfriends, Jace and Cregan!”, the charismatic man said, waving at the camera
Then you and Sara show up in screen, Oberyn grabbed you both under each arm and kissed your cheeks
“You are lucky men!”, he teased. You show up giddy and giggly, hugging onto Oberyn martell
The boys’ smile wiped out immediately, sharing concerned looks
“Is Oberyn going to… fuck our girlfriends?”, asked Jace, with a traumatised look on his face
“No! No”, muttered Cregan looking at the road ahead, “I don’t think….”, they both looked ahead wide-eyed and mouth agape…“Well…”
“He is going to fuck our girlfriends isn’t he?”, asked Jace
“Alright search where is the nearest airport and how much is going to cost us the next plane ticket to the fucking watergardens…”
“We can’t leave the car in here dude!”, muttered Jace, typing on his phone, “besides is going to cost us like a thousand golden dragons and 12 hours with three different connections, by the time we get there…”
“You are right, is crazy….”, they spend the next minutes in silence, just looking at the road, “Look…”, started Cregan grabbing onto the wheel, “...he is Oberyn Martell alright? I don’t know if the girls choose to… do… him… but… if they did… I mean…”, Jace nodded nervously
“Yes we couldn’t blame them, I mean, if I encountered him, and he invited me to his hotel room, I’d go too”, Cregan nodded enthusiastically
“Yeah, right? Mee too, and I wouldn’t like my beautiful girlfriend to be mad, because… he is Oberyn Martell, right? everyone’s favourite actor/philanthropist/playboy/martial arts specialist/tv personality”
“Yeah so if they decided to… go back to his room with him…”
“We shouldn’t be mad”, said Cregan
“Right, right, if anything… we are jealous”
“Right!”, said Cregan, and they both went back to stare at the road ahead
Cregan wished he had gone with you instead of having all those boring family reunions, specially with Robb being so mean, he was forced to hang out in the kid’s table, it was a bit embarrassing, considering he was twenty
But that was done, and now, Jace and him where on his car, on their way down the routes of the North, their plan was to explore some cities as they made their way towards Harrenhal, give the girls time to join them when they finish in the Watergardens
But Cregan was so happy to receive all those exciting texts from Sara, she was having the time of her life thanks to you, and those texts from you to… made him blush as he was looking straight ahead
He wasn’t worried about you and Oberyn, not at all, but he did wish he was with you right now, having met him and together in the sun… summer… made him so horny, he didn’t even know why.
“We should be arriving in Castle Cerwin in a couple of hours”, offered Jace with a smile
Castle Cerwin was a cool town but not where the boys would like to be
But this is the decision they had made so it's the one they were sticking to, besides they were meeting some of Cregan’s friends so it was going to be a fun night in the town with all boys
Then…. Like five other towns in their way to The God’s Eye
But meanwhile
“Should I feel bad that you didn’t bring your boyfriend for me to meet?”, asked Your Godmother over her Chanel sunglasses
As Sara enjoyed the pool over an inflatable flamingo, your godmother started the third degree on you.
“No”, you said shakily, “It’s nothing like that, it's just, he had things to do with his family”
“How serious is this?”, she asked, not convinced
“I think pretty serious”, you whispered as you sunbathed by her side
“It’s a bit soon, don’t you think?”, she asked, concerned
“We thought things through”, you reassured her, “we are taking things slow”
“Are you?”, she asked, well, not really
“My therapist says he is been good for me”, you said, that seemed to content her
“And when can I meet him?”, she asked
“After this, we are all going to the God’s Eye”, you offered with an apologetic smile
“Alright, maybe next season”, she muttered, you only laughed
“It would mean a lot to me if you met him”, you said with a soft smile
“I can’t wait, my love”, she answered, “from what you have told me, he seems like a great guy, and if he is half as nice as his sister… I’m sure he is the right one for you”
“Well, is too soon to speak about forever, but that is how it feels like right now”, you whispered with a silly smile, and you found your Godmother smiling back at you
“I’m so glad you finally found someone who can… well… a decent man”, she finished, you giggled
“After this we are going to Daemon’s house, in the Island of faces”
“I’ve heard”, she teased, “without any adult supervision?”, you giggled
“No… I don’t think so…”
“Take care, alright?”, she asked, “please?”
“Of course”, you whispered
“And tell that little Cregan that if he doesn’t take care of you… I can pay someone to take care of him…”
“Godmother!”, you chided playfully
“I’m just teasing…”, she said sipping her cocktail
You spend the rest of the day in the pool, and by the end, you had an early dinner, and started sipping cocktails with Sara. Your godmother left you, and you both were alone to go to the club that was inside the resort.
You didn’t felt particularly in a party mode, and even though you were with Sara and you were having the best of times, you missed Cregan and Jace, there is some things that you’d rather do with them, like going out to a club, but you were determined to have a great time only with Sara.
The boys haden’t answered much, and you understood, they were driving, you really wished they would let you know when they arrived at their destination, but you didn't want to be pushy… or even come out as controlling
Maybe they were at a spot where they didn’t have a signal… those thick woods around the roads in the North were tricky, you really didn’t want to be concerned… it was a bit frustrating… not knowing what to say or do in this situations
You cared for Cregan and you wanted to talk to him, make sure he is good and having a good time
They barely answered to your video of Obryn Martell when you encountered him
IT WAS OBERYN MARTELL! He was everyone’s favourite actor/philanthropist/playboy/martial arts specialist/tv personality, and they barely answered!
You had to take a long breath
They were driving, haven’t even made it to Castle Cerwyn yet, probably
Your phone “dinged”, it was a text from Cregan
Just arrived at castle Cerwin to Ben’s house, everything is fine, ttyl
“That’s it?”, you asked Sara, as she was applying her lipstick, she read the text and raised an eyebrow
“Well, at least they are fine”, she said dismissively
“Nothing from Jace?”, you asked her
“I’m sure they are fine! Just tired! They had been driving all day”, she said mindlessly, and you wanted to be alright with them… lack of communication
You weren’t stuck to your phone all day either, right?
I’d love to “see” you later, videochat?
You typed, but you erased it before you hit send, you didn’t really want to be clingy.
You look at the mirror for the last time, you were looking fine, so was Sara, with simply dresses, hair loose, simple makeup, comfortable shoes
You had no expectation of the night whatsoever, only to have some Dornesy cocktails and have a real girls talk with your friend
You decided to go to a club a couple of hotels over, they say it was the most fun, you took a hotel van to the place, a method of transportation that was not going to be available later at night
The place was nice, over the beach, a nice looking bar, it was already night, so everything was lit up, outside with torches and other “tiki” looking decorations
You ordered a round of fruit-based drinks and you couldn’t stop chatting about everything you had seen and do for the last couple of days.
Sara had never travelled out of Winterfell before and she was looking at everything with wonder, it was actually refreshing, more so since you haven't been to the Watergardens before either, so it was all new to you too.
The people were nice, and very good looking, the sights were amazing, the Watergardens were some sort of an oasis in the middle of a desert, they were breathtaking
You were having the time of your life, with your godmother and your friend, and yet… you were missing someone, and you spent all day wondering what would it be like if Cregan was here with you, and Jace as well.
It was such a romantic place!
Even though you weren’t sure how comfortable you would be around Cregan wearing a bikini, but at the same time… you felt so… warm… just by thinking about it
You couldn’t wait to meet them in the lake, it was going to be such a great time!
Both your phones “dinged” at the same time, and you grabbed them together, it was a notification of a publication of Cregan and Jace, together.
You found it odd, but went to the publication
And paled
Your boyfriends had encountered the one and only…
“IS THAT…?”, You asked
“Margaery Tyrell”, muttered Sara, looking wide-eyed the photo they posted
“Impossible!”
“Well she was on a national tour!”
“Oh for the gods”
She wasn’t alone, she was with her best friend and also a singer… Jeyne Westerling
One for each
They seemed pretty cosy, judging by the background, they were in some restaurant
“Do they think they didn’t take it well that we met Oberyn Martell?”, she asked fearfully, you didn’t know what to think, what to do
Why didn’t he text you personally?
Why did he have to post it? Well, it was a collab with a friend, a friend posted it, but tagged them so, it wasn’t them, they were probably too busy just… chatting it up with two of the most gorgeous and talented women in the entire continent
“Oh gods”, Sara sighed, “should we call them?”, she asked
“No”, you said firmly, sipping on your cocktail, “we shouldn’t bother them”
“You don’t think they'll have dinner and party together, right?”, she asked fearfully
“No, no I don’t think so”, but when you better thought about it. They were two handsome, hunky, smart, kind, amazing young men and… They would be the biggest idiots if they wouldn’t
“I see concern in your face, should we be concerned?”, she asked, and then you shook your head
“They weren’t concerned about us and Oberyn, right? They are the boys!”, you said as it was obvious, “Cregan and Jace! Not any other!”, you said simply, “we took the video with Oberyn, and sent them a greeting because we knew they were fans as everyone else is, for the record, they did the same! I mean… if they saw Margaery and Jeyne and didn’t take pictures with them like… they are idiots!”, and now you were rambling
“You are rambling”, she said
You looked at your phone as if you could call Cregan with your mind, but it wasn’t working, they didn’t call you, they didn’t ask Margaery to send you a greeting.
Gods
It would be so much better if you could call him, call them, and talk, and hear how much they miss you, as much as you missed them.
“Let’s talk about something else”, Sara offered, ”they are not torturing us all day, we shouldn’t torture them”
“Yes! Yes”, you said simply, and you started talking about the plans for the remaining days.
But something was bugging you, in the back of your mind
It was probably the lack of texting from your boyfriend and best friend
And the very possibility they could be partying with the most perfect and famous person you had ever seen.
You both tried to keep your mind off of things, the place started to get crowded, and you lost your table as it was clear to set up a dance floor and now you were talking at the bar, snacking on Lys fries and still sipping on a new cocktail
Oh if you only notices how far you had moved from your cellphones in the bar
It had been a couple of hours, you had shooed away a couple of guys who were a little bit straightforward
“Want to dance?”, you asked her, and she nodded enthusiastically
“Yes! Let’s do it!”, you looked for your belonging in the bar… and nothing
“Where are our phones?”, you asked, searching frantically
“They were right here!”, she said, as scared as you were
“Dammit!”
You looked everywhere, asked all the bartenders, but nothing, someone took your phones
“We should go back to the hotel”, you said, the night a bit spoiled, you weren’t concerned, they were locked, and unlocking your phone and Sara's was impossible because of the making of the phone itself, but still…
“Yes, before it's too late to get a cab”, she muttered
. . .
“I can’t believe we met Margaery, she was so nice”, muttered Jace with a dreamlike expression on his face
“Yeah, who would have thought? Of all restaurant in the the city, that would have walked in the same one”, said Cregan
“The girls seemed oddly quiet though”, said Jace
“I didn’t send them the pic yet”, said Cregan
“Wait… Ben uploaded something”, said Jace, looking into his socials, “and Sara saw it”
“You have no more messages from her? I have nothing from (y/n)”, Spoke Cregan, now concern
“They wanted to talk but it was when we were in the HIghway entering the city and… it was messy, and we had started fighting!”, muttered Jace
“And then we barely texted them when we were greeting Ben and his ten siblings and his parents!”. Said Cregan
“We told them we couldn’t talk and then Ben uploaded a photo with Margaery Tyrell”
They shared concerned looks
“Are there any chances that they are angry… very angry… possibly contemplating calling back Oberyn Martell because they think we…”
“Yep”, answered Jace quickly
“Oh for the Gods!”, Cregan moaned, rubbing his face, “they hate us!”
“Nah, come on, they are… rational people… right?”, whined Jace, “they are not… criminally insane and go on a guy-kissing rampage only because we didn’t answer a text”
“You are right”, he said simply, “yes you are right, they are probably already in bed, and tired, you know, sunbathing is tiring, the sand like… steals your energy away, right?”
“Right! Right! Right!”
“Are you freaking out?”, asked Cregan
“No no, if anything we should be angry, they are not answering our texts… they are being childish!”
“Right!”
“Right, yes, because, what? They believe we stood a chance against Margaery and Jeyne? Like they would be remotely interested in us…?”,
“Well… they did ask us where we were staying”, said Cregan between greeted teeth
“We are so screwed”, muttered Jace, “we didn’t even tell them, meaning… they at least made Oberyn send us a greeting… right?”
“Oh gods”
“They must be so angry Cregan, I don’t want to lose Sara! I love her”
“I don’t want to loose my girl either, I love her too…”, and then, at that fundamental moment, they stopped their neurosis to look at each other
“YOU LOVE HER!?”, asked at the same time
“And we didn’t even got to tell them!”, said Cregan
“Gods”
“They must be so angry right now…”
“We will fix it, alright? Nothing happened!”, Jace tried to assure himself
. . .
“My feet hurt!”, whined Sara, and you were thinking the same thing, you were probably bleeding inside your high heel sandals
You couldn’t find a cab, of course, so you were walking back to the hotel
“Mine too”
“I want to sleep in that magnificent bed, I want to talk to my boyfriend”, she whined
“Me too”, you agreed
“Do you have your tablet? From there we can let them know our phones got stolen”
“Yes, and we need to get new ones in the morning”, you muttered, whining about your aching feet, “shouldn’t have we gotten there by now?”, you asked, looking around
“Yes, actually, the ride there was straight down the road, and then left..”, muttered Sara, “so naturally…”
“No, no it wasn't left, it was right, the side of the beach was the right”, you said
“Yes but remember the roundabout of the hotel? Makes you think that you are on the right, but it’s actually left”
‘I don’t understand”, you muttered, you looked around, and nothing looked similar, “no…”
“What?”, she asked
“We have been walking the wrong way!”, you whined
“Noooo!”
“YES!”
“DANG ITTTTT”
You were turning around, to go the other way, but suddenly… the most majestic sports car turned around the curb, and stopped right by your side
You couldn’t believe your eyes, it was actually Oberyn!
“Can’t believe my eyes! The northerner girls!”, he said, he wasn’t alone, he was accompanied by a gorgeous woman
“Hello Oberyn”, Sara greeted with the greatest smiled
“What are you doing here alone? Shouldn’t you be partying? Taking advantage of this beautiful city and its night life?”
“Yes we were but our phones got stolen, we couldn’t order a cab to go back to our hotel”, you said with a shy smile
“Say no more, get in”, he invited, the woman just looked at you and smiled… not kindly, but… it was nice nonetheless
You were going to say now, but if you took two more steps on those ridiculous shoes you decided to wear, you were going to cry
You shared looks with Sara and got in
“This is Ellaria… my wife”, he introduced
“WHAT!?”, you both asked at the same time, both relaxed and happy
“Nobody knows you have a wife!”, said Sara
“I know!”, he said with a big smile, she looked back at you both
“So, these are the girls you talked to me about, asking you to send a video to their boyfriends”, said for the first time Ellaria, she had this seductive, smooth voice, with the characteristic Dornish accent, and you couldn’t get over how beautiful she was
“Yeah! exactly, where did you say they are? Why aren’t they here with you!?”, he asked, almost scandalised, and he turned on his sports car and you started sliding through the streets of the Seaside resort of Sunspear… The Watergardens, “you know they do call this city… the city of love”, he giggled
“They wanted to do a roadtrip of the North, we are going to meet in the God’s Eye”, you said softly
“Oh, Riverland, nice”, he said, “I heard there is a festival there at the middle of summer, it was quite the event”
“Really?”, you asked
“Oh yeah, it was quite fun, the Lake Party, but it’s been a bore for the last couple of years”, contributed Ellaria
“Yeah, maybe we should go”, said Oberyn, Ellaria smiled
“Maybe we should”, she teased, “we can make it matter again”, they shared this significant look, like there was nothing else in this world but them, they were so in love, you could tell, they were both beautiful. It was barely a second, he was driving, but still…
You felt joy when you watched them, but… not envy or nothing like that, you…
Were watching what is what like to be with Cregan
Oh how you loved him
Wait… WHAT!?
“Here you are ladies”, he said happily, pulling the car to the hotel’s entry, it was of no surprise he knew which hotel it was, you had met at the club this morning
“Thank you so much Oberyn!”, Sara said
How could this happen? you were with one of the greatest stars of the century, and you only cared about Cregan, and how much you wished he was there with you.
“Let’s take a picture for the socials”, said Ellaria, taking a selfie with you both on the back seat and Oberyn and Ellaria smiling, “I’ll upload it, what are your users?”, she asked
You gave them your social media data, you couldn’t believe this was happening
“Thank you so much, both of you, thank you!”, you said with a grateful smile, “It would be so amazing if we meet again in the Lake!”
“So we can finally meet this boyfriends of yours”
“There must be something in the air, they met Margaery today, and Jeyne”, Sara told them, they shared concerned looks
“Really?”, and then they both looked back at you
“What?”, asked Sara
“Nothing, i’m sure it went well”, said Oberyn
“Oh come on!”, you said to him, “now i’m concerned”
“No!”, said Ellaria, sharing looks and kept repeating like a mantra, “no no no no”
“Ok you look for the picture… is under @BenTallheart999”, you commanded, she looked it up, his account was public, and saw the picture
“Oh, they are delicious!”, she adored
“Hey!”, teased Oberyn, with a big goofy smile, “You know what? let’s discuss this in the bar”
He was so chaotic and funny, you actually went to the hotel bar, you ordered drinks and snacks, and you spent two hours talking about Cregan, and Jace, and their relationship, they were actually giving you advice.
“I think you both need to downplay it, making them wait, and always be on guard”, said Ellaria, “that is how I caught this one!”, she teased pointing at Oberyn
“NOT TRUE!”, he said, “and no!”, he said pointing at you in warning, “it’s clear that these boys feel the same, jump all in!”
“NO!”, fought Ellaria, “you don’t want to give them the power”
“What if… now that we are not answering… they actually go somewhere with that pair of international stars!”, Sara said, concerned
“They will not!”, said Oberyn
“But we have barely talked since we parted ways!”, you said
“Because they are on a road trip! And you are in the pool or beach all day”, he tried to reason, “they understand, you understand, right?”
It was such a chaotic and wild night, you will definitely remember it
You went back to your room, your godmother probably asleep, in her own suit
You almost threw yourself on top of your tablet, and logged into your account
Messages started pouring in, and hundreds of requests to being followed since, of course, OBERYN MARTELL HAD TAGGED YOU ON A PHOTO
And you had several messages of Cregan
Hey love, are you alright?
Haven’t heard from you in a while”
Is everything alright?
I don’t want to sound… or actually… seen controlling but, we are getting a bit worried
Maybe you are sleeping
I miss you
The last text reached you like twenty minutes ago, so you texted back quickly
Cregan! I never meant to worry you, Sara and I went for a drink in a nearby club, and our phones got stolen!
We are back in the hotel
You won’t believe who brought us back!
Oberyn Martell again! AND HIS WIFE, it was bananas
Are you guys alright?
“Give me!”, demanded Sara, and you gave her the tablet, and she logged in her own account
“A couple of concerned messages from Jace”, she muttered
I swear nothing happened with Margaery, or Jeyne, they were great, but nothing happened
Are you angry?
Please don’t be…
I miss you terribly
Please give us a sign that you are alright
“We need to talk to them”, you said
But for tonight? You went to sleep, you were so, so tired
The very next morning, over orange juice, and a big breakfast… you both decided to call Cregan and Jace
���Hey loves!”, as soon as you saw them, you felt relieved.
“Hey girls!”
“We miss you!”, said Jace
You were placed next to Sara, and you couldn’t wait to tell them everything that had happened over the last days, they had been so chaotic
“Our phones got stolen last night!”, you said quickly
It was all fine, and you couldn’t believe you ever doubted them, they were Jace and Cregan, your boys! You only needed to talk to them, Oberyn was right…
It was all good
So… it was so good, you spent the next few days enjoying the pool, the beach, your godmother, eating in the most delicious restaurants, and having the time of your life, taking a long breath of fresh air…
Recharging your batteries after life-altering decisions you had made this year… and especially… to make you think about what you wanted, and where you wanted to go…
And who you wanted to go with you
Cregan
Sara
Jace
Your Godmother, the most important people in your life, and this trip helped you realise that, you were so, extremely happy
You wanted to enjoy those days with your godmother, she invited you here, she wanted to see you, it was mean of you to want to leave because Cregan wasn’t here, so… you were here now, and you enjoyed it to the last second.
Sara, who had never been outside of the North, was seeing everything for the first time and it was so refreshing! She was extremely grateful, and you talked to the boys everyday for an hour about everything they did that day
They were excited, they learned how to properly see a map, because they didn’t want to rely on their phones as much, they sometimes stopped to camp, yes, actually camp, set a campfire, and roast marshmallows, they say they were practising for the summer at the lake, because you were going to have a lot of that.
This was only just beginning
After chapter notes: Oberyn Martell in this universe is like… if Jackie Chan had a lovechild with Robert Downey Jr’s Tony Stark 😂
Sorry if it wasn't that exciting... perhaps I'm saving myself for the next one
TAGLIST!
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Odysseus was afraid the entire year on Aeaea in the Odyssey.
Content warnings: Rape, Sexual Coercion, Sexual assault, Sex Work, power dynamics, this will also be long as fuck as I talk too much. This is NOT a "Circe the Goddess Hate Post". I call her out but that's it. I tried to keep this neutral but still making a point (Let me know if I gotta put more)
Lots of lovely folks on here have written great essays on what Calypso did to Odysseus as it's soooo blatantly obvious there. It literally states how he cried every day and how he flinched from Calypso, very straightforward on how he was explicitly raped.
But I've noticed that a lot of people are always iffy about Circe's situation (understandably so, it's not so in your face.) She's usually always mentioned in the "Odysseus never cheated! He was raped!" posts but then the evidence is only ever given against Calypso, and then mentioning how you can't say no or disobey the orders of an immortal and how it was in exchange for freeing his men.
WHICH IS ALL CORRECT!!! But!!!
There ARE immortal/mortal couples who genuinely love each other. Dionysus and Ariadne, and Eros and Psyche are examples. Apollo and Hyacinthus. Psyche indeed becomes immortal eventually and in some versions, both Hyacinthus and Ariadne do too. But even while mortal themselves, their immortal lovers still remained respectful and loving towards them and definitely doted on them. There are definitely power dynamics at play here but there's some nuance.
Odysseus and Circe's relationship, however, is very different. We all know he slept with her at the very least once. And that was in exchange for his men being returned to humans. That was the only time it was explicitly stated. With Calypso, it tells you every night he was enchanted and slept beside her. It was the narrator speaking but Odysseus is the narrator now and it's his story. If you think he lied, this probably won't change your mind anyway.
But even if it was a one-time thing, (which isn't the only interpretation and I will have points that talk about others) then why did he stay a year? What was he doing?
I'm doing a deep dive into the year he spent on Aeaea based on evidence in Book 10 and then the beginning of Book 12. Step by step, and honestly I'm writing this for Tumblr, not as a thesis so I will be a bit more casual but still using sources. To me, it's very obvious that he was uncomfortable throughout the text simply based on the language that is used. But it's very subtle and not an outright statement of "He's been crying every day."
BTW, just so we're clear, this is not a "Circe is the root of all evil, etc." type of post.
This isn't meant to villainize her. She's an immortal being and in mythology that changes things. Everybody is morally gray. I genuinely think if we were to ask her feelings on it, she'd probably be like "Oh, yeah! Turned his men into pigs! Strange little man he was." I don't think she gave a flying fuck.
I just simply get pissed tf off when people think Odysseus was fine. It honestly disturbs me how often I'll go on other websites YouTube and see everyone call him a whore and a womanizer. It's sexism at its finest because 1.) "MaN AlwAyS wAnTs sEx" and 2.) women can't rape/coerce. THIS IS SIMPLY TO LOOK INTO HIS FEELINGS ABOUT IT.
This is also only for Homer's Odyssey, using different translations. If you want to discuss this, (I'd be happy to! Just be nice!) DON'T BRING UP ANY OTHER WORKS.
With all that out of the way, come yell with me 🤗
I've read multiple translations, as I know there's going to be bias depending on who's translating. And having done so, each one has basically the same situations described the same so that's nice for consistency. Also, there are some parts in the story that are vague and that we'll never have answers to.
Odysseus first simply sees the smoke from her chimney and then sends his men in, after drawing lots Eurylochus leads half of the men to check out the house. I mentioned here vaguely how the 2 immortals he sleeps with are both introduced while singing and weaving, which could be seen as an enchantment (which to me is most likely. They both possess magic and are goddesses). So I'm just gonna move past that. Just take a peek and come back or just know that enchantment was likely.
Next, I'll see people often joke on Tumblr about how
"Odysseus says that Polites is his best friend yet only mentions him once!"
I think Odysseus mentions his best friend, the one to jubilantly go in first, to show WHY he would go through with this. How much these comrades mean to him. That's his best friend, and there are approximately 20 others who are now pigs as well. Could you knowingly leave one of your best friends to live a life like that knowing you could've done something?
[...]Circe—and deep inside they heard her singing, lifting
her spellbinding voice as she glided back and forth
at her great immortal loom, her enchanting web
a shimmering glory only goddesses can weave.
Polites, captain of armies, took command,
the closest, most devoted man I had: ‘Friends,
there’s someone inside, plying a great loom,
and how she sings—enthralling!
The whole house is echoing to her song.
Goddess or woman—let’s call out to her now!’
So he urged and the men called out and hailed her.
She opened her gleaming doors at once and stepped forth,
inviting them all in, and in they went, all innocence.
(Fagles, Book 10)
In the Odyssey, it's never mentioned why she turns people into animals. I think they were turned into pigs because, throughout the Iliad and Odyssey, Odysseus is often associated with boars. His men are associated with him, therefore: 🐖 Piggy. From what we know, the lads were just eating her food. With how much Xenia and hospitality are a large part of the story, they probably thought they were safe. They were GUESTS. This is especially welcome after the Cyclops and the Laestrygonians. And it literally says "All innocence". They were simply naive.
Then Eurylochus runs back, so terrified that he couldn't speak at first. He then begs Odysseus to just leave the men behind. Odysseus has shown that he does TRY to save his men when it is truly not reckless to do so.
But I shot back, ‘Eurylochus, stay right here,
eating, drinking, safe by the black ship.
I must be off. Necessity drives me on.’
(Fagles, Book 10)
Then the famous warning from Hermes. I've seen folks bring this up when talking about this. YES, he is literally commanded by Hermes to not refuse her if he wants his men back in basically every translation. It sounds like Circe was warned as well. When? We don't know, but it sounds like Hermes didn't pick "sides" here.
Strange that he was still like, "Sleep with each other" to both, because he could've been like, "Circe, there's this guy named Odysseus. When he comes to this island, change his men back." But who knows, maybe it was Circe's idea from the beginning and Hermes went along with it. Just food for thought.
Now here’s your plan of action, step by step.
The moment Circe strikes with her long thin wand,
you draw your sharp sword sheathed at your hip
and rush her fast as if to run her through!
She’ll cower in fear and coax you to her bed—
but don’t refuse the goddess’ bed, not then, not if
she’s to release your friends and treat you well yourself.
But have her swear the binding oath of the blessed gods
she’ll never plot some new intrigue to harm you,
once you lie there naked—
never unman you, strip away your courage!’
(Fagles, Book 10)
But that doesn't explain why he was there for a year afterward! Nor if he himself was okay with it, which is what I'm trying to delve into as he wasn't.
Also the knife thing? She's still immortal. It was meant to startle her. Her dad is Helios. Odysseus would've been toast, literally.
Also note this exchange wasn't a "Yippee! Hermes says I'm going to get laid!".
...just approaching the halls of Circe,
my heart a heaving storm at every step,
paused at her doors, the nymph with lovely braids—
I stood and shouted to her there. She heard my voice,
she opened the gleaming doors at once and stepped forth,
inviting me in, and in I went, all anguish now …
(Fagles, Book 10)
Another translation by Ian Johnston, (they all say the same thing essentially but trying to make a point.)
I continued on
to Circe’s home. As I moved on, my heart
was turning over many gloomy thoughts.
After I had walked up to the gateway
of fair-haired Circe’s house, I just stood there
and gave a shout. The goddess heard my voice.
She came out at once, opened her bright doors,
and invited me inside. I entered,
heart full of misgivings.
HE👏WAS👏SCARED! The tone is solemn and suspenseful. He was just told that without Hermes' help with the root, he wouldn't be able to survive and bring back his men. Circe was dangerous.
He made her swear not to harm him.
Straightaway
she began to swear the oath that I required—never,
she’d never do me harm—and when she’d finished,
then, at last, I mounted Circe’s gorgeous bed …
(Fagles, Book 10)
Please note that she NEVER promised that to his men. His comrades did NOT have moli in their systems. He had no way of truly ensuring their safety in any way from Circe.
He then refuses to eat or speak, literally "lost in grim forebodings". If he "just got laid", then why isn't he happy? Not many men can say that a goddess CHOSE to have sex with them. He did it to get his men turned back. It was an exchange. I don't think Circe is "Evil" so maybe it slipped her mind. Or yes, she could've thought, "Hey, I got what I wanted. He's handsome enough. Homer never shuts up about how hot this guy is He hasn't brought up the pigs yet. I'll just let this play out. Maybe HE forgot. I don't have to do anything." We don't know. But Odysseus probably felt like he got deceived.
"Hey, I did my part of the deal. I slept with you. Now do yours."
She pressed me to eat. I had no taste for food.
I just sat there, mind wandering, far away …
lost in grim forebodings.
As soon as Circe saw me,
huddled, not touching my food, immersed in sorrow,
she sidled near with a coaxing, winged word:
‘Odysseus, why just sit there, struck dumb,
eating your heart out, not touching food or drink?
Suspect me of still more treachery? Nothing to fear.
Haven’t I just sworn my solemn, binding oath?’
So she asked, but I protested, ‘Circe—
how could any man in his right mind endure
the taste of food and drink before he’d freed
his comrades-in-arms and looked them in the eyes?
If you, you really want me to eat and drink,
set them free, all my beloved comrades—
let me feast my eyes.’
So I demanded.
(Fagles, Book 10)
He doesn't trust her despite what she had told him that he should when they sleep together. He has figured out that while she will not hurt him, his men were not a part of that oath, the men he was trying to protect in the first place.
She is then moved by how they rejoice when they see one another again. While turning people into animals for funsies isn't cool and coercion is fucked up, I think she comes to see this group as not quite friends but I think she did find them entertaining in a way.
This is very strange but I've seen some folks say that since Odysseus was pissed at Eurylochus for still not believing him about Circe is proof that "Oh he was trying to defend her!". Which??? Uh, Eurylochus was literally questioning his leadership as a whole. Calling him reckless and shit. He is captain and he's the King, he can't let that shit slide. The text literally says "Mutinous". Also if I had to sleep with someone I did not want to especially if it was to save my friends and I got called names afterward I'd get fucking pissed too.
Only Eurylochus tried to hold my shipmates back,
his mutinous outburst aimed at one and all:
‘Poor fools, where are we running now?
Why are we tempting fate?—
why stumble blindly down to Circe’s halls?
She’ll turn us all into pigs or wolves or lions
made to guard that palace of hers—by force, I tell you—
just as the Cyclops trapped our comrades in his lair
with hotheaded Odysseus right beside them all—
thanks to this man’s rashness they died too!
They stay a year. Again it's never stated that Odysseus slept with her that whole time. You could interpret that. (Honestly, I feel Circe would get bored with him? She's a goddess, she's got more important matters than mortal men. And she definitely doesn't love him.)
His men DO have to bring it up that "Odysseus has forgotten his native land." Maybe they thought they could sneak out without her knowing??? I am fucking REACHING but hold on as Telemachus did because he knew Nestor would well, be Nestor and try to coax him with "Have a meal with us! Let me tell you about how badass I used to be in my youth." But to sneak away from a goddess? Without her permission? That won't end too well. Aeolus in the beginning kicked out Odysseus when he tried to ask for another bag of wind. If she didn't want him around, she could literally boot him out. While she didn't force him to stay like Calypso did, she didn't "release" him either.
We don't know if they've been asking for a long time. Odysseus does say to Circe that they have been begging him nonstop, but he could also be saying that to try and convince her. He's good at persuasion. I think while he knew he could rely on her for food, shelter, and good advice, he still didn't feel...SAFE with her. I think he was possibly avoiding her personally.
I think HOW he asks her to leave is important to know as well.
...but I went up to that luxurious bed of Circe’s,
hugged her by the knees
and the goddess heard my winging supplication:
‘Circe, now make good a promise you gave me once—
it’s time to help me home. My heart longs to be home,
my comrades’ hearts as well. They wear me down,
pleading with me whenever you’re away.’
(Fagles, Book 10)
Throughout all of Homer's works, the characters grasp another's knees when they are desperate and are literally at the other person's mercy. Priam did when begging Achilles for Hector's body back. The man who literally killed his son and was defiling his body by dragging it around. Leodes grabs Odysseus' knees to beg for his life before Ody kills him. If he saw her as a friend, and not a captor, WHY DID HE FEEL THE NEED TO BEG IN ORDER TO LEAVE?! No one, who is in a healthy relationship, has to BEG for permission to leave. Or to "Break up", if you interpret them as still sleeping together.
And even Circe acknowledges that he is there against his will!
‘Royal son of Laertes, Odysseus, old campaigner,
stay on no more in my house against your will.
(Fagles, Book 10)
[...]Odysseus, man of many resources, scion of Zeus, son of Laertes, don’t stay here a moment longer against your will
(A.S. Kline, Book 10)
This is probably another reach that you can ignore but the whole "they wear me down", could be trying to appease her. "Look, you're REALLY cool, it's actually my crew that wants to leave hahahah please don't kill them"
I mentioned before how Telemachus snuck away from Nestor but that was simply out of necessity because he needed to go home now. Not rest for the night. NOW. Nestor is just everyone's grandpa. Menelaus kind of talked more but Telemachus is very straight up in "Please I have to go now" and Menelaus immediately got things ready for him. He never has to beg and clasp his knees. Telemachus was never afraid. Menelaus is a fun uncle and Helen is your cool auntie.
Back to Circe! She tells him instructions for the underworld, they were in her bedroom. But that might've been the only way to speak with her. As even Penelope is usually away from the suitors when they are in her halls, Circe may have done the same. The text never states she played hostess physically. If she was hosting in the halls during the day, why did Odysseus wait until night to talk to her? He could've just asked her while she was on her throne in front of everyone. (He did so with the Phaeacians)
Or maybe he went alone because she only swore an oath to not harm him and so he didn't want his men near if she decided she didn't want to let them go. I could be missing something here so feel free to say something. Idk if this was a pride thing on how "I don't want others to see me beg".
She has info he needs in order to go home as well. She tells him to go to the Underworld.
She gave him new fine clothes and put on pretty clothes herself but that doesn't mean they had sex. Nausicaa gave him nice clothes as well but he never slept with her.
Then he leaves. Immediately. Not even doing a headcount as he didn't realize one of his men had died. (That was negligence on his part but he wanted out) He booked it, to the UNDERWORLD BY THE WAY. Circe even had to sneak the animals he needed for the sacrifice. Odysseus even basically said "She's a goddess. She can do things mortals can't" at the end of the book. And it almost feels...Numb? Solemn? Neutral? Gives a "It is what it is" vibe.
But Circe got to the dark hull before us,
tethered a ram and black ewe close by—
slipping past unseen. Who can glimpse a god
who wants to be invisible gliding here and there?
(Fagles, Book 10)
She’d slipped past us with ease,
for who can see a god move back and forth,
if she has no desire to be observed?
(Johnston, Book 10)
She's a goddess. She has magic. She can do whatever the fuck she wants.
NOW ON TO BOOK 12!!! That was long! GET A SNACK AND WATER! LUCKILY THIS'LL BE SHORTER!
In Book 11, Odysseus swears, upon all his loved ones in Ithaca, to Elpenor that he'd give him a proper burial as he's been "unwept, unburied". So in Book 12, he sails back to Aeaea to fulfill his promise.
But you know what's funny to me?
He didn't tell Circe he was there.
He didn't even go to greet Circe himself. He sent his men to go get Elpenor's body.
The biggest clue that he didn't love/trust her is that if she was his "Affair partner" then why not go see her for "one last night together"?
SHE came out herself and pulled him aside to know what happened and then gave more advice.
I dispatched some men to Circe’s halls to bring
the dead Elpenor’s body. [...]
Nor did our coming back from Death escape Circe—
she hurried toward us, decked in rich regalia,
handmaids following close with trays of bread
and meats galore and glinting ruddy wine.
[...]
But Circe, taking me by the hand, drew me away
from all my shipmates there and sat me down
and lying beside me probed me for details
(Fagles, Book 12)
In every translation, it talks about how he sits, and she lounges/lies down. That's not sex 🙃 In some translations, it even says he tried to be with his shipmates but she pulled him away!
So we lay down and slept
beside our ship’s stern cables. But Circe
took me by the hand and led me away,
some distance from the crew. She made me sit,
while she stretched out beside me on the ground.
(Johnston, Book 12)
Then, she gives advice about the sirens, Charybdis, Scylla, and her father's Cattle. He tries to ask if he could save all his men. She scolds him for even thinking he could try. He again books it out of there.
I think we all know it wasn't "love". But I think a lot of people think Odysseus was willing and happy with whatever this was. "Friends with Benefits", if you will. I guess you could see it that way but I will say that makes me feel itchy with the whole power dynamic and fear. I don't think folks who have that arrangement have to beg on their knees to ask if they can leave though.
I mean the entirety of Book 10 gives me the vibes of "Laughing uncomfortably because you don't want to upset the other person". To just grin and bear it.
A lot of this was just putting the text here and picking it apart step by step. What you do with this is up to you. It's rambling while banging pots and pans together.
Maybe you see him as drugged the entire year and still sleeping together, as the moli "wore off". Even then, just because her magic can't affect him, there are plenty of natural concoctions that can be created that can affect mortals.
Maybe you see the entire year as sex work in exchange for shelter and food.
Maybe he was just alongside his men the whole time under her roof and was avoiding her after the exchange. After he got asked by his men to finally leave, he would start to walk up to that room only to freeze and turn around, thinking "One more day won't hurt. Should wait until I know she's in a sympathetic mood".
I beg of you, however, PLEASE understand that there was fear and coercion throughout his entirety on Aeaea. He wasn't staying to get laid. While there is so much going on and too many things that are left vague to really know exactly what happened, it is consistent that he was scared/numb. Lots of people go through with things they don't really want to do just to appease others. There are plenty of situations of sexual trauma where one person goes through something and the other has no idea the other person isn't okay. ESPECIALLY WHEN SOMEONE CAN HARM THE PEOPLE YOU CARE ABOUT AT ANY MOMENT!
Sexual trauma is a very complicated thing and while he was scared, he definitely wasn't as traumatized by her as he was by Calypso. Calypso was a torturous hell while Circe was a year of walking on eggshells. Not comparable but I still think it should be acknowledged. It's wild because I read the Odyssey and kept thinking "Y'all are calling the sex slave a cheater? The guy who slept with a goddess to get his men back? The ultimate simp apparently doesn't love his wife??"
Things I'm adding that shouldn't affect the argument as it is not in the Odyssey but I want to mention as it's a "fun fact": Odysseus' dad was an Argonaut. Laertes probably met Circe as well, (or knew of her) with the whole purifying thing and maybe Odysseus heard his dad tell stories of her. Later myths also have Circe with the habit of turning her crushes (or their lovers) into something with Scylla and Picus.
In conclusion, Yeah, he was afraid of her. At least to an extent. And don't pull the whole "Ancient men didn't get raped". Male victims exist and deserve compassion for what was done to them and women are capable of sexual abuse. If you think otherwise, you are not a true feminist and Fuck you. I said in the beginning this'll be casual and I don't wanna write a fancy ending. You can still think Circe is neat but you have to know that this was fucked up.
If you think a lot of this is bullshit or wanna give more context or wish to yell with me but still know he wasn't alright on Aeaea, cool. If you want to point out mistakes or something I should keep in mind with interpretations then feel free to say so but give text evidence. If you try and bring up the Telegony and/or Madeline Miller's Circe, fuck clean off. This is Homer. If you call Odysseus a whore and not the malewife he canonically is I'll start biting. 😤
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