#pjo funny textpost

[anotherpjofan]

Imagine Paul and Percy’s first meeting like you have Sally telling Paul her child is the sweetest person on earth who wouldn't hurt a soul while in the same breath she goes

Sally: Speaking of, can you convince your school to accept him?

Paul: Uh sure?

Sally: Great! You know what they say eight time's the charm

Paul: Wait -

So obviously Paul does an Internet search and he finds dozens of articles which show that percy is a terrorist who a) blew up an arch b) dumped his class in a shark tank at age 7 and c) casually kills old ladies according to some twitter user so Paul loses his mind. He doesn't know what to believe

Paul: So.. um has Percy ever visited the arch

Sally: Yeah apparently it was destroyed when he was there

So poor Paul is under the impression that Sally is unaware of her son's terrorist activities and expects to find a 6'2 hulking teen with tattoos but instead meets Percy who's 5'5 and hasn't had his growth spurt yet and loses his mind cause what if he's being blackmailed into being a terrorist??

Paul: *trying to be calm*: Hey

Percy: If my mom likes you we're good

And the fact that Percy is 100% a momma's boy and seems nice if not a bit silent? Paul is losing his mind

[demigods-posts]

i love annabeth. she deadass tricked percy into skipping through a field while holding a rainbow staff. i just know she ran away snickering underneath her breath lmao

[godsdamahalfblood]

Will: *on the verge of tears* so i got a 60.

Nico: well that's basically a 70 and then you add your age it's an 85 and then you HAVE to round up so it's a 90 and then round up again because it's tuesday-

Kayla: it's wednesday.

Nico: shut up. round up again because it's WEDNESDAY and you got a 100! yay!

Will: *starts crying*

[godoffamine]

annabeth: I make a valid point but you just rebuttal with “nuh uh”!

leo: arguing with me is pointless

leo: I knew I was wrong 10 mins ago I’m just trying to piss you off *narrowly dodges a knife*

[multi-bookworm]

Nico: why are people so sensitive??

Will: *sighs* what did you do this time.

Nico: I said “your face makes onions cry” and then showed them an onion that I got Hazel to use the mist to make it seem to them like it was crying.

Will: …

Nico: and then I whispered to them “I didn’t even bewitch it”

Will: Uhm Nico-

Nico: IT WAS A JOKE

[yourfavshipsjacolf]

Carswell Thorne ships Jacolf!

[crookedlygreatloudghostlyhideout]

im my integrity away from calling everyone hunnybee

[captcins]

Do you all pronounce it as "Percy jackson" or as "masterpiece" ?

[heroesinolympus]

Percy : *peeking through the crack on the cabin door*

Grover : Um, do I even want to ask?

Annabeth : He just watched Toy Story for the first time. Now he wants to know if Riptide does stuff when he's not looking

[wheresmymom-imlost]

my humour is really bad, so here is a list of things i find funny, (bc that makes sooo much sense)

Jacksfilms humour

"Why do they call it an oven" jokes

Saying "I'm Murdoc Niccals from Gorillaz" in a bad british accent

Similarly, saying 'is that murdoc niccals? from gorillaz?" to anything

G SPOT ROCKS THE G SPOT G SPOT ROCKS THE G SPOT G SPOT ROCKS THE G SPOT

Saying that any basic white guy looks like my math teacher

"Bruno Madrigal? from door movie?"

(If they are done correctly) jokes about percy not being nicos type

Randomly saying 'Jeep'

Saying 'Jason _____? More like Jason Grace'

Pictures of Dave Bayley

Saying '2doc/Jercy/Dnf' whenever i see something blue and green

'SPRAY IT IN YOUR FACE AND SLAM IT..... abe lincoln for student body president."

The entire song 'Seventh Element' by Vitas

' Simple lyfe' By Nichelle de rizzo

ominously far away murdoc niccals

Some quotes that i also find funny 🤪

'I drew a make genitalia!"

'yellow boy sees the void'

'who needs mountains when you have family?"

*in a bad british accent* 'i cut my ear off, like van gogh."

[anotherpjofan]

Shoutout to Paul for straight up stabbing a monster that he couldn't even see with skills picked up from a Shakespeare play.

[astra2111]

Nobody:

Absolutely no one:

_Percy and Leo at 3am_

Percy: I’M TOO HOT

Leo: HOT DAMN

Percy: CALL THE POLICE AND THE FIREMAN-

[godsdamahalfblood]

Will: I broke my nose :(

Will: it hurts

Nico: you should ice it

Will: since when do you give me real advice instead of saying "sucks to suck"?

Nico: I'd just prefer it if your face didn't hurt to prevent future issues

Will: when did you start being nice to me?

Nico: I didn't

Nico: shitbitch

Will: there we go

[godoffamine]

Leo: *making the Argo 2* everything might go wrong.

jason: you need to be more confident!

leo: okay.

leo: everything will go wrong

[multi-bookworm]

Percy: we are born killers. What seperate us from other killers is we only kill bad people.

Nico: usually.

Percy: usually.

Jason: unless it’s an accident.

Percy: it’s usually an accident.

Jason: yeah

Nico: yeah

Percy: yeah

[damdaughterofathena]

Percy: I can't find my phone

Annabeth: don't worry I'll call you

Percy: no wait-

phone ringing under the couch: baby shark doo, doo, doo, doo, doo, doo baby shark doo, doo, doo, doo, doo, doo

Annabeth: