#probably not it’s probably gonna make me wait until like. November to calm down BUT

[booksapphic]

why is applying for a new apartment the most stressful fucking thing in the world

[natti-ice]

Never Been Kissed- Tom Riddle.

Pairing: Tom Riddle x fem!reader

You go out at night to meet a friend, and end up forming a new relationship.

Warnings: OOC Tom riddle, set in the Marauders era!

Author’s note: this is a reuploaded and modified fic I wrote a while ago!

Reblogs & comments are greatly appreciated<3

Sneaking out of your dorm room, you make your way up to the astronomy to meet Sirius Black. This was a normal occurrence, you two would meet every Friday to talk about what happened that week or what's been bothering them and just goof off. You and Sirius have been friends since first year and last year you two started this tradition of meeting weekly. Since you're both in your last year at Hogwarts, it's hard to make time to see each other during normal hours.

Crossing the castle careful not to run into Filch or worse Mrs. Norris... the biggest snitch in town. Thankfully you have never been caught, can't say the same for Sirius, that boy makes so much noise wherever he goes. After climbing the crazy amount of stairs to the top of the tower finally you see the clear night sky. It was truly a beautiful sight, the early November night was chilly but not bad enough for a jacket.

You're always the first one there, arriving at around 11:40 pm, but Sirius shows up fashionably late at midnight, making you wait.

Tonight he seemed to be taking his sweet time because your watch is reading 12:18 am. Maybe he's having a hard time picking out an outfit or got attacked by a wild banshee, maybe he just forgot? You thought to yourself. Knowing him, he probably had some superficial reason as to why he didn't come to see his favorite person at Hogwarts. You waited until 12:40 a whole hour late and finally decided Sirius Black had flaked on you.

It didn't hurt your feelings much since it was the first time it ever happened, but you're a little irritated that you wasted an hour doing nothing. You're a night owl so you aren't very tired, you decide to explore the school for a while. Standing up from the wood-paneled floor, you let your legs take you wherever.

You walk down many corridors, peaking into abandoned classrooms here and there while also keeping an eye out for Filtch. Eventually, you find yourself outside of the castle and decide to go by the lake, you always wondered what it looked like at night. Walking around the lake at night is kinda creepy when you think about it but you also find it oddly calming. You don't stray too far away from the castle just in case you need to make a run for it, you find a tall oak tree and sit under it.

Lost in thought thinking about everything and nothing, you failed to hear the footsteps approaching you rather quickly.

"Good evening." A voice pulls you out of your thoughts, You look up and see it's the one and only Tom Riddle. He was hovering above you, his signature smirk on his face.

"Uh... hi Tom" You reply a little startled

"Why are you out here so late?" He asks calmly

"Oh um, no reason, I normally-" you say when something comes to mind "Hang on, aren't you a prefect?"

"I am." He says with a hint of arrogance and pride in his voice

"You're not gonna write me up are you?" You ask calmly but on the inside you're praying he'll cut you some slack.

"No, no I'm off duty right now." With a slight smirk on his face, he replied "I'm breaking curfew as well" he whispers almost playfully

You chuckle softly, feeling immediately relieved "Alright then... would you like to sit?"

He doesn't reply with words but with actions, he sits down next to you. Not too close but not too far, a respectable distance.

You and Tom weren't close by any means, you had only met this year in potions class. Tom being known as the introverted Slytherin who had a way with the teachers. You who laughed with your friends and wasn't an overachiever but still had good grades nonetheless. Slughorn decided to pair people who he thought would sort of yin Yang each other so that's why you two sat together.

Not speaking, you sat in awkward silence. The wind tussling the trees filling the air, the night got colder since you left your dorm, now you wished you had brought a jacket. You rub your hands up and down your arms trying to warm up

"Are you cold?" Tom asks noticing your slight shivering

"Kinda... yeah" you replied

"Here take my sweater" he said pulling off his grey cable knit sweater

"Oh you don't have to-"

"Just take it... please." He said the last part softer

He had a hard time controlling his temper at times, he was working on not letting little things get to him.

"Thank you." You softly smiled at him, a small silence falls over you two as you put on his sweater. Wanting the conversation to continue you ask, "Did you see professor Dumbledore's outfit today?"

The both of you engrossed yourselves in conversation for 15 minutes straight jumping from topic to topic. Once you started talking it felt like you had been talking to each other for years.

"And then I bit her." You admitted embarrassedly after telling him a story of an altercation you had with a girl a few years ago.

"You bit her?!?" Tom asks with a shocked expression

"I did, I didn't mean to it was just instinct I guess."

"Wow remind me never to do that to you" Tom laughs

"It was so embarrassing it keeps me up at night" you sigh as you remember the embarrassment. "Okay, I have to know something embarrassing about you now." You say trying to divert the attention off of you

"What? Why?" He says with a puzzled look

"I mean, it's only fair"

He sighs "Ok ok fine, umm... I haven't had my first kiss." He swallowed

"I'm being serious Tom." You chuckle not believing him for one second

"So am I." Tom said with a straight face

"Oh." Your laughter immediately stops

"Is that so surprising?" He asks, almost sounding irritated by your response

"Actually yes, yes it is" You stated

"How?" He was genuinely curious about what she thought of him

"I mean, I figured you would've had a girlfriend or something. Like you're attractive and not terribly hard to get along with." You laugh softly while explaining

He suppressed his smile before he spoke next to not let you know how much your words affect him.

"No, no girlfriend. It's not that I'm waiting or anything, the moment just hasn't come I guess. Sometimes I just want to get it over with"

A pause

"I'll do it." You speak, not knowing what came over you

"Excuse me?" He questioned

"I'll kiss you" you offer

"Are you serious?"

"Yeah, friends help each other out, right? It's up to you" you say not wanting to push him into anything.

He wondered if he should or not, he always thought you beautiful. He never had the courage to talk to you until he was paired with you in potions. What if I suck at it? What if she doesn't like it and tells all her friends? He thought. No, stop you'll be fine just go for it.

"Okay" he replied

He said yes, he actually said yes. You didn't think he would actually say yes but he did. You were very thankful he did because that would've been embarrassing if he said no.

You scoot closer to him slightly to close the gap between you. You search his eyes trying to find any ounce of doubt, you felt butterflies as what was about to happen hits you completely.

"Ready?" You whisper

"Yeah" he whispers back flicking his eyes down at your lips then back to your gaze. Slowly moving his head forward.

Copying his motion you lean in. As your lips connect your eyes flutters closed, Tom brings his right hand up to gently cradle your face. Rhythmically you two move your mouths as one, in a sweet gentle kiss.

After a few seconds he pulls away, both of your faces feel red hot. Not sure what to do next Tom clears his throat and looks down at his watch.

"It's late... we should probably go back to the castle" he says

"Yeah you're right" you agree feeling embarrassed

Tom rises first, he offers you a hand. You hesitate a moment before accepting it, allowing him to pull you up. Tom hand lingers on yours for a second too long before releasing.

Walking side by side into the castle headed toward your dorm. Tom insisted on dropping you off. You both walked together in a thick silence.

Making it to your common room entrance, it's time to say goodnight.

"I had fun tonight" you spoke first

"Yeah I did too" he smiles very softly

"I uh, I guess this is Goodnight" you smile "Goodnight Tom"

"Goodnight Y/N"Tom turns around walking a few steps before you notice you still have on his sweater.

"Wait, Tom, your sweater." You call out to him

He turns to face her with that same small smile

"Keep it, it looks better on you."Tom walks away.

You smile to yourself and think to yourself I think I like Tom Riddle.

[koexchange]

erm this is on my ao3 https://archiveofourown.org/works/49051921

or read below :333

a/n: this was a req on my ao3 :3

word count: 631

Witchcraft was your specialty. Groundskeeping was your profession.

It paid the bills. Took up free time. Made you forget about your loneliness.

You had never been much of a romantic. Which is to say, you were perpetually single.

That never bothered you though. You found comfort in casting spells. It made getting through life easier.

It was probably the reason you were the only cemetery keeper. And definitely the reason your pay was a thousand bucks an hour.

Sorcery made your life a living heaven! Nearly anything you wanted, at your fingertips.

But of course, there were rules to spell casting.

No making people fall in or out of love, no time travel, no clone making, no reviving the dead, blah blah blah.

But where's the fun in playing fair?

On the fortune morning of November 8th, you had a 3am shift.

As you stomped over the old dead people, you saw an abnormally large grave.

One that looked like it could fit two people.

Catching your interest, it started to glow an eerie blue. You waltzed over to the dirt patch, reading the headstone.

"Leo and Vincent Caruso." It called to you. Literally. Called.

Perhaps your enchanted headphones were acting up again. How the fuck did the headstone just speak?

Standing no less than 5 feet away from it, you begin to hear more voices. What fun.

Then you remember it. The dud spell you cast yesterday, on your day off. 'The revival of the Two of Hearts.'

You had to burn a perfectly good deck of cards.

Sure, you didn't actually think a resurrection spell would work, it is forbidden after all.

But the two corpses crawling out of the earth are living- sorry, undead proof. It worked.

The only consequence for summoning the undead is the unlikely possibility of them haunting you. You know, eternally. 'Till you die.

Sounds fun.

The voices were bickering, over what? That was beyond you.

Standing directly on the old grave, shovel in hand, you start digging. Until you're yelled at.

"Hey! Who's banging on our roof?!"

"Calm down, Leo. I'll check it out."

Uh, hell no.

You would have ran, but you didn't have any time to before a ghost-like figure was sprouting its head up.

"Oh. Someone's here."

"What? Tell me it's not the groundskeeper.

The second 'person' joins their roomie above ground.

You're mumbling the words, "Yeah, I'm out." before you can stop yourself.

"Holy shit! You can see us?" The second head speaks again.

"You know what, I wish I couldn't." You start walking back to your car, done with this nightmare.

"No- wait come back!" "We have a visitor, Vince! We should welcome them!"

"Welcome? Why would I want to stay with you undead strangers?" You stop in your tracks, instantly failing at trying to ignore them.

Showing his full body, 'Leo' calls, "We aren't that bad! Promise!"

There's no less than an hour left on your shift.

What's hanging out with some old-ass ghosts' gonna hurt?

Both men stand on your earthly level, looking a bit too excited to meet you.

"It's been forever since we've had company!" That explains it.

"We were revived yesterday, Leo."

"Fuck you."

You sense a strange feeling of peace running through your body as you listen to their banter.

"You're welcome for that, by the way." You tip off your witch hat.

"Huh? Welcome for what?" Leo asks.

"Oh, I cast a resurrection spell, and it partially revived you old hags."

"Old hags?"

"Shut up." You all laugh, comfortably. "But yeah, I'm a witch. Not really sure how you missed that, Vince." You gesture to your foot-long hat.

He scoffs. "It's Vincent to you."

"Whatever you say, Vince."

Leo, feeling left out, yells, "I'd say we're all gonna get along great!"

a/n: i feel like this fell apart at the end but this was such a silly req tysm bro

[problematicpervertpod]

recs on recs on recs

Yaoi/Manga I’m reading/have read. Please support the artists on official websites. If you have recs or want to chat about any of these get in my messages right the fuck now my dudes. Also spoilers, also this probably doesn’t make sense to anyone but me, also I think I’m funny sorry in advance.

Dangerous Convenience Store

Tags: Ongoing, self aware lead for the most part, gangs, smut, love triangle, possessive, not rapey, seme is like the fucking hulk compared to uke, college, age gap, good art, muscular bodies, seme is adorable/romantic in sp chapters, sexual awakening, meeting the gang (in two ways!), FAINTS OF CUTENESS/HOTNESS, the memes after every chapter got me gagged, HAHE hahahahahahahahahaha, OMG DO I GET SOME CNC?! (update: short lived), we stan a vocal man (Ahjussi), thigh fucking, my mans be like my thighs hurt fuck my ass instead DECEASED, ass smacking, these memes are so good god damnit, rimming

8/10, I live for Ahjussi (Am I spelling this wrong..)

The New Employee 

-love love love

Tags: ongoing, we stan supportive boyfriends, healthy relationship, boss/employee, smut, office setting, good art, 10/10 will re-read, muscular bodies

Love Shuttle

Tags: completed, ABO, enemies to lovers, possessive, coworkers, fake relationship, strong omega, the art sucks but I like the story, art gets better after the 1st season, alphas eyes change colors when happy/anxious, muscular bodies, 7/10, update 10/10 art is meh but fml this storyline is basic af in the best way and it’s the fluff/smut I need, when you’re caught by the folks *cringe*

Hold Me Tight

Tags: ongoing, boss/employee, bodyguard, gio can’t feel heat until felix comes along, uke is strong af, horny bastards, smut, possessive, tragic childhood, moving in together right away, rich seme, felix in a bunny costume though *heart eyes*, dialogue is great, rape in a technical sense but the vibe is written like both characters are all good after? Ex. hospital scene…dub con, ART IS GREAT, hand holding during sex, 10/10 will re-read, muscular bodies

Yours to Claim 

Tags: ongoing, love triangle, Dom/sub dynamics, smut, main is big switch energy, reincarnation, jealousy, manipulative, possessive, self aware lead for the most part, toxic af, GREAT ART, college, rich semes, 10/10 will re-read and not even finished, SONOFABITCH that cliff hanger!! Season 3 come thruuuu (I have to wait until November? *cries* BUT MAH LOVE TRIANGLE!!, I want a THROUPLE GOD DAMN IT

The Grandmaster of Demonic Cultivation

Tags: obsessed with this story, will the incense burner scenes make it?? No tags because I'll never forget this one haha wangxian 5ever, send me all fanfics/fan art you have about this story, love Dark Wangji, Jadecest, ABO/omegaverse, Bottom Wangji/Top Wei Ying, and honestly anything regarding this fandom

Bj Alex

Tags: completed, great art, 11/10 will re-read, cam boy, fanboy, seme is an asshole, uke is so sexy, jealously, rich seme, enemies to lovers kind of?, CHANWOO IS MY BOY FOR LIFE, Chanwoo MD supremacy, BDSM (like really really), fuck I love Chanwoo, college students, rich seme, emotional rollercoaster, uke soft body, mean seme, college life, that one nosy bitch ass guy trying to expose my boys needs to fuck right off, seme split/fake personality, dub con 

Anti PT

Tags: ongoing, 11/10 re-readable, porn with feelings, love triangle, jealousy, attempted non-con, personal training wink wink, main love interest is actually the best, second male lead is a god damn creep, first time, smut, great art, sex addict/constantly horny uke, I WANT A HWI, 

Related: https://www.anime-planet.com/manga/anti-pt/recommendations 

Payback

Tags: ongoing, both are psychopaths tbh, revenge, gangs, uke sells himself to seme, violent seme, entertainment industry, brunette supremacy, what this motherfucker gonna do? hehe , great art, muscular bodies, dead dove do not eat, my mans must be GOOD looking/animal magnetism cause everyone losing their fucking minds, okay this is a comedy I’m dying, he tried to scare him with wanting to be a top but my psycho said REVERSEUNO BITCH I’M A VERSE (wait jk apparently *sigh*), anonymous masked sex (sad n’ kinky)

My Suha

Tags: ongoing, wow this gets dark, possessive af like holy shit, terrible people all around uke, rape, boss/employee, office politics/family politics, smut, characters that are punchable, dead dove do not eat, *velociraptor noises*, avoided this for a while but I’m back because nothing can be more emotionally devastating than Banana Fish, TIE HIM UP, FUCK HIS FACE ALKSJD:ASKD, FUCK SUHA UR SO HOT that dirty talk though YAS, glad I picked this back up lmao, GOD DAMN IT just when the package arrived then this red head fucker *screams*

Shame Application aka Dirty Vibration

Tags: completed, friends to lovers, model seme, cute af uke, love triangle, entertainment industry, smut, kink, all kinds of sex everywhere, realized feelings, mutual pining, jealousy, rich seme, blonde seme, big brother 1984 always watching, 10/10 would re-read, porn with plot, they were roommates!, ~straight~ seme, first times, great art, remembering some cringe but considering the story it’s par for the course

Will You Subscribe

Tags: ongoing, season 1 completed, enemies to lovers, cam boy, office politics, boss/employee, hiding a secret, public sex, stalkers/creepy men, emotionally stunted characters, mutual pining, idiots in lust, lingerie company, slut shaming, jealousy/possessiveness, season 2 bebeh, HOLDING HANDS *velociraptor noises*, LMAO okay my mans is not THAT old how tf does he not know netflix and chill, BUNNY COSTUME (quickly becoming my new fav trope in manga, A+ gang), oh we stan a good boy, wtf is wrong with wanting to do cam work, ‘I wish my marks could become permanent’ *omegaverse wink*, *works for lingerie company* *doesn’t understand where bf gets sexy costumes* like wut kind of fuckery…, cross dressing ftw, roleplay, classic BL miscommunication trope

Hyperventilation

Tags: completed, high school crush, unrequited love, mutual pining, smut, quickie (short story), class reunion, apparently furry with the extra chapter turning my man into a bunny but c'est la vie! https://myreadingmanga.info/korean-bl-animation-hyperventilation-engsub/ this is the animation of the same story, different endings but same in tone (this site is spammy AF but the English subs are so hard to find for this) 8/10 

Unmei no tsugai ga omae da nante

Tags: only one bed, ABO, office setting. Coworkers, enemies to lovers, competitive, equality in the omegaverse, dubcon, real dicks and not lightsabers, fated pair, art is cute af 8/10

K’s Secret

Tags: buckle up buttercup, dead dove do not eat, angst, pining, somnophilia, dub con, non con, boss/employee, manipulative, stalking, forced relationship, tragic childhood background, weird art but gets better,  uke: don’t threaten me with a good time but seriously stop threatening me, possessive & obsessive, seme is like the fucking hulk compared to uke, wow were going full psycho stalker hm?, dating a narcissist is all fun and (mind)games, con non con… ? honestly who tf knows, domestic!, OW MY HEART, the t/n WAP note sent me, ch 51 translated by gen z, do special ep= furry? Wait there’s a maid costume, bunny costume, directors friends keeping it real, rough translations 8/10

Enthusiasm

Tags: ongoing, dead dove do not eat, uke buys seme, masc boys, muscular bodies, fight club, master/slave, rich uke, revenge, real dicks not lightsabers, rough sex, cuckholding, daddy issues, suicide, wow the end of ch 5 punched a hole in my heart, penile implant life,  rough translations makes the storyline wonky, nvm back to lightsabers *star wars noises*, HAD ME FEELING SOME TYPE OF WAY I CAN NOT, shibari, possessive, wait this is cute *velociraptor noises*, angst, no kithes for you “bestie”, OBSESSED, honestly choke him pupper, STAY THE NIGHT ALKSDJA:SLDKJAS:LKDJA:SLDKj, problematic but I’m riding for these two, 

Ichimai Goshi Fetish

Tags: completed, short, fetishes DO start in childhood don’t they *ruminates*, author: describes ML as a beautiful 2D character meanwhile: ML IS 2D character, fellas is it gay to kiss the homies?, “real dudes don’t interest me” is a MOOD, comedy, jealousy, college setting, dialogue is A+, not lightsabers but not dicks either, first time, when you’re fucked so good you think you’ve died, https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R4uEq5Nx6ko, hero/villain roleplay. Fluff n smut 10/10

My Purrfect Boss

Tags: completed, tooth rotting fluff because blondie is so FUCKING cute little sensitive soul, golden retriever boyfriend, pure comedy, DECEASED, MY MAN JUST DID THE SLOW BLINK, office setting, boss/employee, ~wasted~ (red dead redemption meme),  FFS SO CUTE, he put a ring on it right away beyonce would be proud af, he protecc he attack but most importantly he hit it from the back, jealousy, honeymoon phase of dating, the ex is a snake (update: oh wow literally), I’m picking up abuse/PTSD vibes based on how Kang reacts to his ex :(, classic BL miscommunication plot, immediately no meme audio (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o6XWSGfYnps) ,  I WILL STRAIGHT UP MURDER CHA WTF!!!!!!, gang rape, spiked with drugs that force heat, me rn:*screaming/rage*, psychotic ex/abuser, HE PROTECCC, actual relief after that scene jesus fuck, okay YES kings I see you, okay this is giving me cuteness aggression, hi yes I’d like to adopt a cat and a dog please 9/10

Following Namsoo to the Bathhouse

Tags: completed, same author as, “My Purrfect Boss”, A+ comedy once again, JUNIOR, gay awakening, “fap myself to death” DEAD, facial expressions are ridic, my minds telling me no but my body, my bodyyyy’s telling me yaaaaa, ya boy is literally losing his mind over this, actual lightsabers lmao, FLUFF, permasmile, 6969, THINKS THEY’RE GOING TO EAT RAMEN, dense gay, own your skin wtf okay hannibal calm down, everyone is officially cray,  ah I also am barfy when drunk, denial really is something hm, classic BL miscommunication plot, when people pleasing too far, happy ending 🥺🥰, side story: our crazy gets his very own crazy (ashton Kutcher from spread vibes), public sex, sex sparkle 9/10

Alien in my Closet

Tags: ongoing (maybe completed but def ongoing on the site I use), not rapey at all?? You’d think it’s impossible in this medium ffs, anti pt vibes, cute art, fluff ‘n smut, red head!!, they were roomates!, sex toys, bsdm, D/s (brat)dynamic or maybe owner/pet, bondage, *tiffany hadish voice* this is noiceeee, con humiliation/degradtion, SANTA CLAUS, edging, marking, one lotus please (he’s clearly read the 4 agreements and karma sutra), con non con, exhibitionism, the wrist thing stays on people, Katoptronophilia,  roleplay, is it stalking when you bring your friends?, lotus: welcome home cheater, the chin on the head thing gives me cuteness aggression, the twins are my favs, when ur crush vanilla af 😭, haesung: experiment on me daddy, no dick until halfway through/fingering supremacy, bedroom sessions has me gagged, voyeurism, wait they haven’t kissed this whole time I forgot (audio: https://www.tiktok.com/@ryley/video/6976701880277748997?lang=en), sunbae is sus, YES FINALLY A FUCKING SWITCH COUPLE AKJSDHALKSJDHASKLJDHALS KJDALKSJD (update: sort of), there’s a missed opportunity for an anal probe joke, damn it okay maybe sunbae is chill, 3 musketeers, my heart*implodes*, *velociraptor noises*, 12/10 would re-read such fluff my heart 

On Doorstep

Tags: completed, age gap, reese has ptsd, jimmy going from 0 to 100, jimmy really got down on his knees at work, ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) deepest part you say, real dicks, ride him like a rodeo, quickie/short story, porn with plot

Gorani Jeon

Tags: ongoing, omegaverse, no alpha though, animal hybrid, art is beautiful like it's drawn on paper not a screen, 40 inch weave yours came in a pack, historical (non-modern), lord send me a sexy man pls, the memes after each chapter are golden, taking the phrase licking wounds literally, is that an eggplant or are you just happy to see me hehe, ahhh so inhibitors do exist here, vertical 69, here lays Bau fucked to death by Ran, WHY HE TOUCHING MY MAN, these chickens are dope, stomp on his dick, that’s what I call a happy meal, fucked right out the front door I’M DEAD, mpreg, i need a tiger+mountain god spin off (whoops dad/son my bad), slice of life, cute fluff 8/10

Room to room

Tags: completed, college setting, A+ dialogue, absurd size difference, unrequited love,  sexsomina, dubcon, angst, death by a thousand cuts emotionally, insecurity, body envy, pining, friends to lovers, they were roommates!, homophobia, sexual assault, PTSD, gays in denial, the tattoo 🥺 ow my heart, truly this is 90% smut, “going from unrequited love to fwbs is shittier than I expected”, dowan *bad blood by t swift* when he sees garam, ch 22garam reminds me of my ex and that’s not a compliment, I’m not gay but my boyfriend is vibes, triflers need not apply, spanking, 😭😭😭😭😭 my heart hurts, is anyone getting a bit of a puppy play vibe? https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Vni9ZWmDXis, handcuffs, lots of head we stan, dowan’s gotta a touch of a foot thing or maybe body worship thing, asdlfgkjs ;dlkfgjsd;flkgj;sdflkgj;sdlfgjs;d/gkdf SO CUTEEEEEEEEEEE, roleplay. They broke the bed no use of crying over spilled milk ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°), side stories delivering man in uniform and sex toys AND puppy, asdlkjaslfkasdjfl;askdfjasdf the shirt thing is so hot, watersports, I take it back this is 98% smut 9/10

Mistake Lover

Tags: completed, when ur bff is back on their BS, love triangle, coworkers, i swear all these ukes look the same to me at this point (which is very cute), GE!!!! (wangxian flashbacks), wait no smut?.... Paused

Yagi to ookami no hatsujou jijou

Tags: completed, quickie/short story, literally on my reading list because a comment said “nice cock 10/10”hahahaha, animal hybrids, scifi/aliens, me during chapter one: am I a furry? No. Am I? Relevant audio https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=noJNIqvDfoo, hotties when human GOD DAMN, bi king, okay I stan this girl changing gears take your opportunities honey!, does blondie have a tinder or how is this happening? (update: called it), feminization, dubcon/noncon, marking, heats, idk about 10/10 cock but not lightsabers, translation is ruff (get it?), a yankee hahaha, literal wound licking, googles chimera, *claps* yes king selfish call his ass out, tail holding caaaayoooot, not that isn’t usually copious amounts of cum but really this is a lot 8/10

Make Me Bark

Tags: completed, $250 a month rent?? *cries in Californian*, god damn it these grey haired 2D men are really hot fml, “next months rent is a looming concern but I hope it’ll get better” followed by apartment on fire is how I feel about reality, rare characters that smile way more than they frown, sex toys, kink, puppy play, owner/pet dynamic, sugar daddy/baby, college setting, harness, muzzle, leash, tail plug, shirt thing!!, soaked briefs, playing barbie IRL, omg meet cute at the adult store, intercrural sex, possessive/jealousy, ah fuck yes I saw this panel on IG but it didn’t have the source but now hehe, whipping, choking, spanking, *bookmarks*, simp city, childhood friends, side couple cute af, yeonsoo: sorry I’m an anti romantic, size queen, mens lingerie, domestic, mutual pining,  these bestie pairings are *chefs kiss*, skinny but muscular bodies/no ridiculous size differences, “does he have a big dick?” “probably” “well tell him to come” GAGGED AJKSDHALSKDJHA this dialogue pure comedy, exhibitionism, human auction, maid costume, men in heels, topping in a dress, girl at the bus stop HAHAHA, ffs this is so cute, side stories: it’s a small world afterall, dynamic role reversal, pink haired boy is guru, SCREAMING AKDJA:SLDKJA:LKDJA:LSDKJLAKDJA:LDJAL:SKDJASLKDJA:SLKDJLAKSDJLASDJ:LASJD:ALSKDJASL:DJ:ASLJDPUTARINGONIT!!!! 11/10 

Gurume no fukurami

Tags: completed, quickie/short story, food fetish, feeding fetish, age gap, throuple-eqsue? There’s 3 people involved, paused ch 1 pg 30

Under the Green Light

Tags: ongoing, thank you IG for rec’ing this, brunette supremacy, neurodivergent?, lmao @hag, this statue is everything I wonder if it’s based on a real piece?, we went from talking art to being pinned to the ground REAL quick, translations rough but not as rough as my mans here, draw me like one of your french girls vibe, sass master, these dicks are ridiculously huge which is saying something for this genre, i love a verse/switch, “first time he’s asked someone to stop so his self-esteem is hurt” HAHAHAHA, stealing bae’s shirt, facials galore, car sex/public sex, jin not into praise kink clearly, sort of slut shaming jealousy, marking

Walk on Water

Tags: completed, for being about porn it’s not that smutty (i take it back), “don’t even think about running away” got me like https://giphy.com/gifs/VABbCpX94WCfS, actual dicks (lightsabers later must be the cleaners not the OG), muscular bodies, blonde seme, brunette uke, k mcqueen is everything, honestly haven’t loved a couple this much since chanwoo x MD and I LOVE THEM, jealousy, orgasm denial, the angles/frames of the art in this are insane (11/10), emotional intimacy CUTENESS HASIHDLASKDHJLAKSJDH, i wanna lick lick lick you from your head to your toes, dirty talk A+, bestie you turned out to be Judas you judgy fuck how dare you touch my man, Ryan is 50 shades of fucked up bb needs therapy, Chang and yeowoons sexual tension is *chefs kiss*, I ship it/all my ships sailing, woof non con but expected tbh, YEAH BABY YEAH *Austin powers voice*, fml I don’t want this story to end, meeting the Hets ™ would make me nervous too, spiderman kith, mirror sex sjkadfhasldjkfh, 34+35, JOI but with a partner? Not D/s, promises are made to broken hehe, that feeling when you understand the title, omg the fan art is so cool!! 15/10 would re-read seriously I can’t explain how well the artist used angles/how she portrayed the scenes was fucking MASTERFUL

Woof Wolf

Tags: that's my best friend (saweetie), red heads, werewolf au, college setting, students, shoot a shot in your mouth while I'm riding, facials, marking

Sexual Awakening of an Ex Delinquent 

Tags: completed, quickie/short story, sexual coercion/non con/dub con, tiddies, bondage, nipple play, edging/orgasm denial, candy in ass wow, food kink, kink in general, rich seme working class uke, lightsabers,  big dick Jesus fuck, exhibitionism, public sex, men's lingerie, Blondie is a sweet baby angel, self hatred/homophobia, sexual narrating that has me like oof 😣 that's not how this works but okay, the sweet spots thing is a great line, man is a slave to the sweets, lmao at the meme at the end of ch 9 fucking facts, kidnapping plot, rapey guys all around this story, tattoo/back story reveal has me like *nods head yes*, my throats broken has me gagged, crazy amount of sfx noises that distract from the art (I really appreciate cleaners I realize), first times, rushed ending feels,  would rate 6/10 not terrible but probably won't read again.  

With Your Tail Yes

Tags: ongoing, IG rec, quickie/short story, on man brunette looks EXACTLY like a different character by another artist like for real duplicate, home boy pulled Elle Wood’s Bend n Snap and we are HERE FOR IT, lingerie/cross dressing, okay compilation of short stories, great artwork but wtf these are far too short (maybe uploaded wrong..?), *immediately makes deal with the devil because yum*, ah okay previews THEN stories, human animal hybrid situation, lightsabers, fucking imagine your crush delivery the sex toy you ordered online HAHA *dies*, buys toys because men ain’t shit is a VIBE, you know he’s always wearing matching sets because he’s 100% that bitch, dub con/non con, knotting (unexpected), exhibitionism, public sex, good ol’ fashion blackmail to get your lover to stay with you trope, sexual assault/attempted rape, victim blaming, shibari, leashes, D/brat dynamic sort of, copious amounts of cum, lube? What lube?, marathon sex, first time, 75 hours?? Immediately no meme, 7/10 mostly for art/concepts but not execution

Heat and Run

Tags: ongoing, IG rec, omegaverse, friends to enemies to lovers, multiple couples as main to sides then sides to mains, my heart dropped because I thought the first sex scene was incest but then realized I’m mixing up all the characters derp, dense gays, this is america (the shooting comment WOOF reality feels bad man), blondes have more fun, real dicks, dubcon/CNC dealers choice, mutual pining, idiots in love, big alpha energy BDE, there are moments I feel Hayoung on a spiritual level and not sure that’s a compliment hahaha, orgasm denial/edging, istg if he bonded without Hayoung permission *jenna marbles BOIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII YOU BETTAH NOT*, also I was hoping the idol was him but realizing it’s probs his sis, *deep sigh*, BDIRL, wow racism, oh no oh no no no no no meme audio, listen everyone needs to get into therapy to break that generational trauma is all I’m saying (not excusing abuse at all, trauma isn’t a free pass), NO ONE WANTS TO PLAY A GAME WITHOUT KNOWING THE RULES :ALKSDHJALKSDJA:SLKDJTRUE, matthew singing bo burnham: I’m problematic *background singers ‘he’s a problem!’*, i ship it yolo, JAEHO STAN (no means no!), mpreg, god damn it I am so worried about him getting roofie and the party scene hasn’t even started ABO WHAT HAVE YOU DONE TOO ME, OH THANK JAEHO, dayummmm that clapback was real fuck him UP, me clapping: MARK HIM MARK HIM, GOD DAMN IT WITH THESE ONGOING FUCKING CLIFF HANGERS FML, marked via knotting? Okay that’s new, but also like normal marking I think, fucking til bottom pees trope

Heaven Officials Blessing

Animated series season 1 complete. Live action currently filming (same director as Untamed too UGH SO HAPPY)

Tags: ongoing, same author as my fav ever MDZS, just finished season 1 animated on netflix and can no longer avoid this because I LOVE THEM, all the memes on IG make sense now, Prince voice: Dearly Beloved (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aXJhDltzYVQ) we are gathered here today to dive deeper into a fandom I will never escape, ART IS AMAZING (https://tenor.com/view/incredible-talented-lady-brilliant-gaga-gif-14857187), group chats are always chaotic tbh, wait a minute meme audio: bride = bottom? How tf did I not get that the first time round *sigh* always hoping for a verse couple, the asst. Boys I ship hard, the sass, fuck this is going to just be pure angst isn’t it *straps in, has fluffy manga queued*, even if no smut 11/10 gege porn, not subtle, god FUCK this ART IS SO FUCKING GOOD THE TALENT skjas;ldkfja;, 🥺, traumatic cliff moment *mdzs flashbacks*, HC smirk is my new favorite thing, no fucking but lots of touching, size difference, horror, gore, wuxia, great side characters, my ear feels tingly too lmao, SOMEONE BETTER GET THESE MF SNAKES ON THIS MF PLANE (cliff), umbrella moments got me uwu, gimme at least didi pleaseandthankyou, FUCK I LOVE THIS ARTIST she keeping us WELL fed with these extras DAYUM, wind/earth master ship please sail, CALL ME DADDY IM DEAD, HC has LWJ energy like you are not qualified to talk to me LOL, WAIT this totally counts as there was only one bed trope, also I’m already excited about omegaverse ff (send me recs please please please)

4 week lovers

Tags: ongoing because apparently I want to torture myself, mutual pining/”unrequited love”, college life, friends to lovers, blackmail ur crush into sex trope, public sex, I was going to tag possessive body language but possessive in a general sense apparently (starting strong yessss), sure jan @unrequited love dialogue, THEY WERE ROOMMATES *cackles*, sus haha, rough translation, pure comedy, shirt thing!, casual abuse :( (back story, traumatic childhood), I’m getting TharnType vibes (but not quite…), that note is precious, cry during/after sex, great angles, dialogue A+ 

Burlesque Night

Tags: completed, quickie/short story, stripper/body guard, coworkers, lust at first sight, magic mike vibes, fridays = getting fucked on stage O-O, well that was traumatizing af, took a bullet, real dicks, LDR, CUTE, I’m not in love with you… sure jan, OH WOW MASTER dlksaj;alsdkja;lsdkja;sld, gay awakening/first time, the art detail is *chefs kiss*, disappointed but not surprised :( :( :(, we stan a yes and lover, shirt thing, still not sure wtf the vertical anus thing is but full circle moment haha, you know what fuck it I’d re-read this 9/10

My one and only cat

Tags: ongoing, cat hybrids, god damn it I’m totally in furrydom ffs, ah well here we go, idol hot = loneliness wahhh /s, so hot he literally transforms other beings, omg a cat cafe CUTE, fuck that cat is cute *so fluffy*, stalker status, comedy, real dicks, I think the uncle would be supportive/jealous even I hope they talk about it I’m dying to know his thoughts, big tiddies, if this ain’t the cutest shit FLUFF/SMUT, copious amounts of cum, ate it with the panties on, CAKE, xmas, his milkshakes bring all the boy(cats) to the yard, trifling bitch

Imitation Mate

Tags: completed, omegaverse, alpha x alpha. Class rivals YAS, childhood frans, enemies to lovers omg this is all the shit I want, manipulation 1000 but yolo I ship it

Mr. 100% Perfect

Tags: ongoing, so relatable, OCD?, hoarder, when I read the title I thought mental illness and I was right, masks ugh RELATABLE, getting back together w ex, woof sibling drama/manipulation, suicide attempt, omg their communication regarding the psycho is REFRESHING, OMG JEJU ISLAND I see it in every fucking kdrama ever but this is the first time I’ve seen it mentioned in a manga *hm* interesting, furry furry everywhere, eye contact, finished reading season 1 pause for an omergaverse cause, okay I’m back and season 2 starting STRONG #1 men are gross #2 mans just went right to a blowie while mf was trying to pee lmao i can NOT the germs barf, fuckboi extraordinaire stressing over a textback is *great*, that istg face is perfect, HYUNGGGG, hand on his heart OW MY HEART, vibe check LOL, here for this plot dev, END OF SEASON2 NOOOOOOOimnotready. Head bonks CUTE

The origin of species

Tags: ongoing, omegaverse, sex tape, blackmail, i already don’t like this teacher, size difference, ‘JUST DIE’ hahahahahaha, I’m in love with noona, wait Ahjussi means uncle/mister? Dangerous convenience store has a new meaning to me now, DECEASED @they won’t, copious amounts of cum, alcohol to have intimacy *sighs in early 20s*, also WTF THEY ARE FUCKING AND THERE’S NO PHERMONE STUFF! What’s the point of being ABO without smell *swaggy p meme???*, wait okay ch 11 it begins, stockholm syndrome but since childhood I’m fairly certain *looking at you teacher I don’t trust these mfs*, dubcon obviously, also the can’t be knotted thing has me *cardi b meme that’s weird that’s sus* obvs poor bb about to get preg af, five word horror story: I won’t hurt you again *why tf you lyinggggg why u always lyinggg meme*, white collar crime, what’s the point of a contract when there’s no actual choice

How to Chase an Alpha

Tags: ongoing, lowkey been avoiding this one not because I think it’ll be bad I just..idk the brain is a weird thing, page 2 and I love mains attitude fucking gagged sass me bb, starting with rough translation but it be that way sometimes, GROUNDS HIMSELF BY TOUCHING HIS BLACK CARD I CANTTT, pheromone city fuck it UP, MC is a MOOD, mutual pining, when u and bae both hire PI’s to get info on each other, R-E-S-P-E-C-T, shirt thing, fucking chuffed about the rival fucking bring it, funny art, cheated on ugh mah heart I saw it coming and it still hurt, pure comedy this airport scene is so funny to me wtf, LDR, good ol murica fuckboi, LOVE HIM RIDE FOR UR MAN/MORALS, liams a little rapey rapist hm? No one’s ever said no… well being flooded with pheromones isn’t consent my dude, istg liam = I love it when they struggle, obvs jealousy/possessive tag but such is ABO, cat suit, BUNNY suit, sexy costumes, god damn it I love them that proposal/mpreg so cute, imprinting AW, ugh baes fam is so cute I needed that bc I wanna strangle wooyoungs dad, THE SECETARY is my fucking fav never stops being A+, SEC+LIAM?? Here for it *i ship it*, FUCK SO CUTE 12/10 re-read, fluff n smut, excited for how to chase an omegaside story hyung needs love!, JINI is mood, sales king I’m dying, that collar is ~hot~ btw

Egoism

Tags: completed (because jesus I can’t with ongoing, theheartbreakTM), UPDATE FML THE HEART BREAK IS REAL also no smut, omegaverse, hey stepbro, starts with rape, possessive/jealousy (isn’t all ABO?), age difference (6years, alpha is younger *can I get hyung plz lord*), HYUNG, woof this dad SUCKS, child abuse, rape culture *sigh*, I wanna get jacked like rick and summer and beat tf out of the dad, me n my cat, TELL EM HONEY I love this MC, traitor indeed, beta x omega btw, fated pair, coercive sex, didi going to be his own demise, BREAKUP/TIME SKIP NO this is BL hell, the rona is mentioned in this, ALL I WANT IS TO HEAR YOUR STORY WAHHHHHHHHHH also YES MY SHIP IS GOING TO SAIL I CAN FEEL IT, okay honestly frustrating a bit but also liked it yah 7-8/10, won’t re-read unless I’m looking for hurt though cause the comfort is BRIEF

Yarichin bitch bu

Tags: ongoing, reading because I watched this anime after seeing it mentioned in the comment section of -im-being-harassed-by-the-sexiest-man-of-the-year, anime was 2 eps a fucking wild the way this is uploaded SUCKS, no reality porn what plot rape-y ridiculous and now I need to read the source apparently haha, I need to know much more about yuri and blue hair guy ASAP (they have the spin off*adds to list*), high school setting, smut, studentsxstudents/teachers, photography club my ass, sex toys, kinky, crossdressing, gay awakening, unrequited love, jealousy, fake relationship, two faced people, OCD, COMEDY, rich people problems, hoarder, inferiority complex, one bed, toono is a dumbass in this love triangle or denial might be a better word, they are cousins my dude stop shipping it (I say to both toono and myself LOL), I wanna see Yuri’s face laksdjf;aldskf, vibrator #18 line is fucking iconic, yaguchi is about to get real interesting (BPD?), lies/manipulation, oh toono you sweet summer child, YURI i can’t wit chu, wait did he just punch the student because he won’t kiss him or???, dubcon/noncon obvs, finally my verse couple but they’re not a couple (yuri/tamu), they all care about each other is a weird way awwww, love confessions to pet vibrator scene are ICONIC MY DUDES I CAN NOTTT, lowkey living for Yuri’s drooling at this point, Jimi gives me such bad second hand embarrassment, Yuri the switch verse bb I’ve been looking for need more!, internalized homophobia, blackmail, MIDDLE FINGER IN THE AIR YAS KING, the heartbreak of ongoing/hasn’t been updated in years

Yarichin bitch bu dj wa

Tags: not completed I think, years old though, see above you know what it is, so cute omg, FIRST KISS AW, degradation kink?, MY VERSE COUPLE I’ve finally found you, biting, choking, rough sex, sex toys, they had fun together for another two hours DECEASED

Fucked by my Best Friend

Tags: ongoing, friends to lovers, body swap, Porn what plot, cannon threesomes in past maybe??(MFF for sure but MMF??), beach life, revenge, he became a HOT woman so honestly get over it, sloppy seconds, first off you’re both sluts second lmao this is going to be wild hm?, fellas is it gay if you kiss the homies, classic did you cum guy jfc, that’s how you get preg dumbass, ah the joys of being a woman /s assault in der clrub, *DEEP SIGH* @ you almost being raped turns me on, YES TURNING BACK DYING, gender has nothing to do with this LOL but true. Also yes cannon threesomes/orgies, googles frotting, mans like narrating playtime, intecurial sex public sex, lingerie, this is the closest thing to straight manga I’ve read hahaha, THE SCIENCE OMG FUCKING RIDIC :you need a mass amount of semen within you SURE JAN, possessive. Objectification, she trying to fuck without Shion LMAO, 34+35, do you think he’s on r/nofap, dry orgasm honestly impressed with mans rn ngl, spit as lube, anal fingering, just helping the homies find their prostate, bottom shaming (disappointed but not surprised), bis/gays in denial smh, question if he has a wet dream will he turn into a woman?, shirt thing, lol at female orgasm =anal in switcharoos mind, paging doc perv, shion is enjoying dressing up hm? Same dude, biggest reality gap is believing shion got admitted to a college HAHA, bad anatomy all over the place dude, rui is a dedicated exhibitionist, HE SO TIGHT BECAUSE THERES NO LUBE team no lube over here apparently not even a courtesy spit, yandere territory sort of?, Mayu with the dick wet comment is *chefs kiss*, THE HEARTBREAK OF ONGOING WAHHH I can’t believe I read all this but I can? 8/10 problematic possessive porn

[im-in-love-with-pizza-bites]

It Takes A Village Chapter 10

Chris Evans X Pregnant!Daughter!Reader

Series Master List

Series summary: You find out that your pregnant. After being kicked out of your mom's house you go to live full time with your Dad who you only saw once every few months. Will he react badly to you being a mom at such a young age?  

Chapter Summary: you announce your pregnancy on Instagram and start rethinking everything.

Series Warnings: swearing, fighting with a parent, teen pregnancy, speak of abortion.

Chapter Warnings: teen pregnancy mentions puking

You had been on the couch watching Peter pan but now your morning sickness kicked in. You were home from school today due to it being a half-day, your dad was at the store. So you were home alone and throwing up in the toilet with Dodger staring at you concerned while he whimpered. Once you were done you washed your face and brushed your teeth before you went back to the couch to finish the movie. After you posted the photo showing you were home there were rumors as to why. A few gruesome ones, like your mom died, (in all different ways) and a few normal less gruesome ones, such as your dad was able to get full custody of you.You ignored them you were planning on sharing the real reason tomorrow.

"Sweet-pea! I'm home!" You heard your dad say when he entered the house a few bags of groceries in his hands.

"Hey dad!" You said looking over the couch to look at him.

"Hey you okay? Seeing all those rumors?" He asked from the kitchen as he began putting everything away. You got up and walked in.

"Yeah haven't been on social media much since I got out of school I've been watching movies. And I think I have some baby names." You told him excitedly as you began to help him.

"What happened to not picking a names until you knew the genders?" He asked smirking at you.

"Don't worry one of them are after you." You said. He looked at you smiling silently begging you to continue. "No! You don't get to know! But I'll tell you the middle name ideas I have." You said.

"Continue." He smiled at you.

"Okay, so Christopher and Scott are the middle names if I have boys." You said continuing putting away the groceries.

"Okay what about the girl names?" He asked.

"Maxine, and of course the basic white girl middle name of Anne." You said giggling.

"Basic white girl name?" He shook his head at you but you could see the small smile on his face. "The other one is cute though." He said.

"I know!" You told him smiling.

"And Scott will also be happy will one of those names... He's been telling me how you were definitely going to name your baby after him." He explained, you giggled.

"Because I already told him." You said giggling.

"Sweet-pea how could you tell him first! I'm your dad!" He feigned offense before you both laughed. "But really those are great middle names. Especially the first one you said." He smirked at you. "Okay I'm going to make dinner you can get a movie set up for us to watch okay Bubba?" He asked.

"Okay. What movie?" You asked him.

"You pick bubba." You nodded leaving the kitchen Dodger following.

----

You stood in front of the mirror looking down at you baby bump, phone in hand. Unbeknownst to your dad you were doing this. He was outside with Dodger and you told him you were doing your homework. Of course he'd know that was a lie once this photo goes around. You faced your camera to the mirror the bump was clear from your side you took the photo. You went onto Instagram, a bunch of notifications from your last post filing in. You clicked the new post, you picked your photo before writing a brief caption that said:

"As my last post has cause many questions maybe this with clear some things up. Two new Evans are due in November. I prefer not to go into detail about anything about me being home or about the babies or their father, I just prefer the media and my dad's fans stay out of it. I hope you all can respect that."

You hesitated reading over the caption as many times as possible. Before setting your phone down not posting the picture. You sighed sitting on your bed. You looked back at your phone grabbing it and turning the comments for the post off before quickly clicking it then going down stairs and outside where Chris sat.

"Dad I posted a photo of my baby bump everyone knows." You sat next him sighing. He looked down at you. He pulled you into his side giving you a reassuring smile.

"I told you not to post anything bubs." He mumbled. "Has anyone said anything yet?"

"I turned the comments off..." You mumbled into his shirt.

"That was a good idea. You gotta show me how to do that Bubba." He leaned over kissing the top of your head.

You giggled. "Okay old man." His phone dinged and he looked at it and sighed.

"Well your post is getting attention. Sebastian and Mackie and asking if it's true." He showed you his phone.

"Ooh call'em I want to say hi." You sat up leaning your head on his shoulder. He chuckled shaking his head before face timing them.

"Hey lil Evans!" Mackie said seeing you. "Are you pulling a late April fools prank or was that post real?" He asked.

"It was real... I forgot you guys follow me." You said.

"Your gonna be mom aren't you like 10?" Sebastian asked, slightly teasingly. "Wait... We're you not gonna tell us if we didn't see that post?"

"I'm 15. And before you ask any questions about the babies, I'm having twins, the dad knows, he doesn't want them, I'm 12 weeks along I don't know the genders, and... I think that's all.. Oh and that's why I live with dad, and no I'd tell you eventually, probably next time I saw you and you met the babies." You rambled.

"Who is the dad?" Sebastian asked.

"Jake." You mumbled.

"And your good with this? Two new babies in your house?" Anthony asked Chris.

"We already talked 4 weeks ago when I found out." Chris said.

"You've known for four weeks and didn't tell us Y/n I thought I was your favorite uncle?" Sebastian pouted at you thought the screen.

"Hey I thought I was your favorite uncle!" Anthony said.

"Why do I need to have a favorite?"

"I'll be the babies favorite uncle." Anthony said

"With all of the people I've told about the babies you guys are definitely the most chill about it." You muttered before looking at your phone eyes widening at how many people have already liked the post already. And the press was probably already writing about it.

"Okay bye guys we'll talk to you later." Your dad said before hanging up the face time.

"I think I made a mistake I shouldn't have posted it, dad!! I shouldn't even be a mom now I'm putting my kids into the media! Dad, I had the privilege of not being in the media often since I lived in texas no one is gonna go there and try to take photos rednecks would shoot em! My kids have to live where ever you are because I'm a minor! I'm so dumb! I should've kept it a secret." You rested your head on his shoulder as you rambled. He sighed not knowing how to calm you down so he just looked down at you rubbing your shoulder. "Oh not to mention what is someone from town sees that! They'll all know and show Jake or mom! My kids won't even have their father! Only a mom. I can't take care of the babies I can't even drive! What am I going to do take them to school on a bicycle?" Your rambling continued.

"Bubba... You'll be able to drive when they start going to school besides you have me. Don't worry about town. Or the press." He said. To be honest those were thought he's been having it was why he didn't want you to tell the press. You grew up in a small town in texas with a whole bunch of rednecks even if the paparazzi found out where you lived the town would've chased them away, not because they liked you but because rednecks are crazy. If you still lived there press would be a lot less of a problem. And for the whole, your kids won't have a father thing he knew even if their dad wouldn't be there he would be the best male role model he can for them. But he also noticed that if you weren't at school or work you were always busying your mind, with homework or reading you barely read before. He could only assume it was because of the breakup and being kicked out. Just a way for you not to think of them. Dodger ran over licking your hand as you continued your rant to your dad.

"Shh, bubba." He cooed softly as your rant ended. "I told you, you're not going to be alone. I'll be there to help you the whole way."

Taglist: @toastisgood @coldmuffinpartycloud @thevelvetseries @uniquebeautyqueen

[genesisrose74]

Christmas With the Karasuno Boys (HC’s)!!

Part 2: Kageyama, Hinata, Tsukishima, Yamaguchi, Kinoshita, & Narita

Part 1 (Daichi, Suga, Asahi, Nishinoya, Tanaka, & Ennoshita) here!

A/n: Tumblr said my word count was too much so I’m splitting this bad boi up into two parts :p Enjoy!!

*****

Kageyama

This boy has a secret soft side for Christmas istg

He HATES showing it to other people on his team and shit

But holy bejeezus he is mesmerized by the holiday in every way possible

Lights, sweets, snow, just like,,, the general magic of December is the most awe-inspiring thing to him

Since he is still a sporty and pretty active mofo, you decided to fuel that on your holiday-themed date as Kags had noted that he’d never gone sledding before

Your jaw was on the FLOOR when he first told you because he would 10000% enjoy the hell out of it

And so you dragged him out to this popular sledding hill that you frequented as a child and taught him what to do

Not gonna lie, he was kind of nervous

“Well you’re experienced at it. I don’t wanna mess up”

🥺🥺🥺 bubby

“You won’t, Tobio! I can already tell you’re gonna be a sledding pro”

Feels a little better after that, but he asks you to help him out for his first run down the hill

He sits behind you with his arms secured snugly around your waist and his head nestled on top of your shoulder

Which would probably seem really funny to passerby because this boy is tol and intimidating in most other situations

As soon as the sled started down, Kags tightened his grip and made this cute little yelp of surprise

But you were laughing insanely hard at the combination of going really fast downhill whilst also having your boyfriend cling to you for dear life

And then when the sled stopped safely at the bottom he started to chuckle

FULL ON, GENUINE SOUND OF ENJOYMENT

That shit is rare

Y’all stayed at that hill for half the day because it was so fun

You got him a new, very high quality athletic roller for Christmas because his old one was just not cutting it anymore

And you also gave him this really cute bracelet with a volleyball, his jersey number, and a little strawberry milk set of charms attached to it

It matched this really pretty and subtle chain he’d bought for your birthday

His blueberry eyes got all wide with affection dfjdskfjsdk—

Got super blushy and couldn’t get a handle on his speech for a fat minute

He thinks you’re the coolest person ever no I do not take criticism

Geez you’re both adorable together, ideal “stoic boy becomes warmer during the holidays around his love” movie plot and I love it

Hinata

He is all in on Christmas. Not a chance this boy doesn’t get excited as hell

Will openly go into holiday mode as soon as November is over

Was secretly already listening to his Christmas playlist before then

He is one of the sweetest gift givers, that is FACTUAL

If you want something really badly, he will take notice and get it as your present immediately

He’ll also gift you an extra thing that’s handmade 🥺

Like some pastries that his mom helped him make, or a specially made basket of soaps with your favorite scents in it

It’s absolutely adorable and you cherish those ones especially

Is happy if you simply get him something; mans doesn’t care what it is

New practice volleyball? A brand new sweatshirt? Elated either way

You had seen an advertisement for a friendly match between Japan and Poland’s men’s volleyball teams, so you waited online on the ticket sales website until the minute it opened

Spoiler alert: you got some banger seats 😌✨

Shoyo may or may not have tackled you when he read the ticket details, letting out his excited giggle (you know the one)

“I can’t believe you got these, angel! You’re coming with me, right? You’ve gotta! Thank you, thank you, thank you!”

Gives you sweet little kisses between each individual ‘thank you’

“Of course I’ll go with you, Sho! I’m really glad you like it!”

He will give you the brightest smile of all time — that shit makes Christmas lights pale in comparison

“Have I told you how much I love you?”

RIGHT BACK AT YOU BBY

Hold his hands to warm up together when temperatures drop pls :)))

It’s become a weekly December tradition to watch a Christmas movie with Natsu at the Hinata household

She’ll sit in your lap while the three of you are cuddled under a blanket together, and Shoyo will lace his fingers with yours all discreetly

In conclusion, I am a sucker for holiday Hinata 🥺🥺🥺

Tsukishima

His room is decorated to the very minimum simply because his mom and brother had insisted on him being festive

You know those holiday instrumentals that are really calming and jazzy and stuff? Yeah, that’s the only Christmas music he will tolerate in his house

While he’s still got his usual icy demeanor, this blond bitch does get slightly less snippy with the Karasuno boys

Is always on the nose with getting you the exact thing you wanted for a present

Like,,, TO THE SMALLEST DETAIL

You don’t even have to bring that shit up beforehand, he just KNOWS

“Tsukki, how did you—?”

“It’s pretty obvious, with the way that one ad kept showing up on your phone.”

b r u h

How does he pay such good attention without even letting on??

As for his own present, you’ll usually get him two: one gag gift and one more serious gift

His dino plush collection size is partly due to the former’s contributions this time of year

Yes the dinos have names

You exchanged gifts on Christmas Eve with all the team (you made him go) and he saved your more serious one for last

It was a scarf that you’d gotten custom made, which had a Spotify code knitted into the fabric

Scanning the code opened the app to a playlist you’d created especially for him

He got pretty quiet when figuring it out and scrolling through the playlist

Would let out a certified Tsukki Nose Exhale™ when he came across certain songs

The more subdued reaction was expected because it’s Tsukishima

His little chuckles and warmer eyes were enough of a giveaway to tell you he very much enjoyed your gift

But on the walk home, he took the scarf and wrapped it around you both, and then brought his arm around your waist

“Thank you.”

You deadass almost combusted because it was so unexpected??

“You’re welcome. Merry Christmas, Kei”

Way to respond calm and collected 😌👍

But on the inside your body was in freak out mode

He wears the scarf all the time jdfsklfjdsk

Yamaguchi

Take the most tooth rotting fluff you could imagine

And then double that and put a fucking cherry on top

That’s the equivalent of what Christmas is like with Yama Yama

Y’all are like kids in a candy store — literally

For your Christmas dates it’s all about sweets and shared giggles, so frequent trips to the candy and baking isles of the grocery store is a must

Making gingerbread houses, peppermint tasting (mostly trying those different and wild ass candy cane flavors), you name it and it’s there

Stomach aches? I don’t know her

Yeah you do but they go away with enough butterfly kisses 🥰

Tadashi is exceptionally good at decorating gingerbread houses for whatever reason

He put a poll on his instagram between yours and his final products and he won by a landslide

It’s not like yours was necessarily bad, more like he’s just an icing master

You also might have eaten too many gumdrops which left your rooftop lacking in ✨spice✨

But it’s okay because Tadashi donated some of his leftovers to you

He’s such a sweetheart uwu

Please for the love of everything get him something heartfelt as his present

You know those long distance bracelets for couples?

Basically if your s/o taps the icon on the bracelet it’ll send a little vibration to the other person’s as a notice that you’re thinking about them

This boy seeks constant reassurance, and you love to give him his deserved love and validation, so it was the perfect present

It takes a second for him to figure out what it is, but after reading the directions and testing it out, the most adorable smile erupted on his face

And then since you already had yours on, he tapped the little icon again with a giggle

“Hey there”

It becomes common habit to tap it at least once every couple hours

GOD HE IS SO CUTE

He is just so soft this time of year, give him all the love and he will return it tenfold ☺️

Kinoshita

This boy is absolutely an awkward cutie and an avid romantic

Give him the cliches and he will eat em up, no doubt

It naturally gets more apparent around the holidays

He’ll take you on pretty winter walks, give you lots of little gifts (while blushing a hell of a lot), and is just a professional at stumbling upon some mistletoe

Wow wonder how it got there, Hisashi

He’s quite a bit more confident when simply alone with you than in a crowded space

And that definitely shows when he takes you out on a secluded sleigh ride around town

Yeah you heard me

A fuckin’ sleigh ride

Horses and blankets and everything

Don’t even ask how he managed to pull it off, because he loves watching the cogs turn in your head and simply will not give you a straight answer

Of course there’s the nice driver guy who’s there, but in the back alone Kinoshita’s confidence goes 📈📈

Lots of flirting, tons of skimmed touches and shared giggles throughout the ride

I legitimately simp really hard for him

Anyways it was a gorgeous ride through town and super fun

On Christmas Eve you both exchange gifts together and tbh whatever you got him will leave him happy and flustered regardless

But when he opens the wrapping paper to find an entire set of vintage VHS tapes, he’s stunned

He owns a VHS (actually canon!) and honestly loves it to death, and the fact that you’d get him tapes of pretty high quality for his collection meant a lot

Gosh he’s so underrated but a definite sweetheart, give him all the holiday love

Narita

Another underrated bby 🥺

He’s so chill and is pretty open to anything during the holidays, so long as he gets to spend ample time with you, his friends, and his family

Definitely more of an indoor person despite being accepting of most situations

Hence why you thought a cute little indoor winter picnic would be right up his alley

Which it absolutely was 😌✨ nice work

You’d made plans while in secret communications with his family members about the whole thing

He’d been pretty stressed lately with trying to handle his schoolwork, while also helping out others with theirs

Despite being a wonderful tutor, it was clearly becoming a bit overwhelming as he tried to grapple with so much at once

So when he came home one day to find a pristine house with you settled on a blanket in his living room, he was quite surprised

There’s a cheese plate, soda cans in a cute ice box, sandwiches, snacks, a presparked fireplace — you and his family went all out

Really adorable I cannot lie

“I thought you said you were going gift shopping today?”

“I might have maybe lied :P”

So he gives the sweetest little smile and sits across from you

Y’all stay there and talk for hours

After finally getting through everything previously laid out on the blanket spread, you slid him a little rectangular box that he looked at curiously

“Already? I haven’t wrapped yours yet!”

“Mine can wait a bit! Just open yours”

And so he does, and you watch with a face-splitting grin as he looks down in awe

You got tickets to see his favorite rock band in concert while they were on tour

He sprung onto you and pulled you into the tightest hug ever

“Holy shit you’re the best I love you so much how do you get even more loveable every day—!?!l”

It’s a jumble of words but you’re able to put it together and it makes you giggle

He deadass sprints upstairs to go get your gift and make sure that you feel as equally appreciated as he does

In simple words: wholesome holiday sweetness 🥰

[isoldmysoultojonahclemence]

JONAH’S EVER AFTER ON IKEREV TW

I CAN’T I--

HIS RELEASE CAMPAIGN CAME OUT YESTERDAY BUT I ONLY SAW IT A FEW MINUTES AGO BC I WAS ON VACATION I CAN’T BELIEVE I MISSED THIS WHAT KIND OF JONAH STAN AM I

THIS MEANS THAT JONAH’S ROUTE CAMPAIGN WILL BEGIN SOMEWHERE AROUND LATE OCTOBER OR EARLY NOVEMBER IN THE ENGLISH VERSION SO MARK YOUR CALENDARS

I’m putting the rest of this under a cut for length bc I HAVE SO MUCH TO SAY

[Translation:

“On the 1 in a hundred million chance that I cannot marry you into the Clemence family, then I’m prepared to abandon my family.”

Whether it’s to build a family together, or to receive happiness together. For the one you love, the path you should take to the future is...

“You’re really too much. Don’t say something like...I’m sorry.”

The eyes that are brighter than the fireworks in the sky overflow with tears, and turn into strength to overcome the mirror blocking our path.

“When it’s only the two of us, I’m just Jonah...and I want to spoil you as much as I like.”]

ASDFKJWEIH;KAFJJE;LSAKFSD

I CAN ALREADY SENSE THE ABSOLUTE ANGST IN THIS ROUTE

IN HIS ORIGINAL ROUTE HE HAS TO ABANDON THE RED ARMY AND NOW IN HIS EVER AFTER HE HAS TO ABANDON HIS FAMILY TOO????? ESPECIALLY AS WE ALL KNOW HOW MUCH THE CRIMSON LINEAGE MEANS TO HIM??????????????????

And something I also really like is how the themes from the original route extends into his sequel, like the parts about “never apologizing” and “I can only be myself when I’m with you.” It just makes it feel more like a sequel and adds a better sense of completion uwu

ALSO JONAH’S TEARS ARE GOING TO DESTROY ME Y’ALL WILL SEE ME SOBBING ON TUMBLR WHEN I GET TO THAT PART

.

Here’s the mini talk list:

Luka + Sirius: please tell me about your families!

This one is already out, so here’s the screenshots!

[Translation:

Sirius: My home is always full of flowers, it’s a place that makes your mood lift.

Luka: Yeah...as opposed to Sirius’s family, mine was very quiet.

Luka: Even though it had always been pretty quiet...but ever since “that person” left home, it became even quieter.

Luka: Maybe it was because my family weren’t interested in me, so that’s why it feels so quiet.

Sirius: Haven’t you ever had experiences of playing noisily with Jonah in your home before?

Luka: No. We’re different from Sirius’s family...but there was only one time.

Luka: When I was young, that person had brought me out secretly before.

Luka: The both of us ran around and played in the secret courtyard that person found...

Luka: Until the skies grew dark.

Sirius: ...Is that so. Where is that courtyard full of memories? Is it close to your home?

Luka: I don’t know, I can’t remember...but, it doesn’t matter if I can’t remember it.

Luka: Now I think...it’s alright if that courtyard only exists in my memory.]

*deep breath*

ALKL;KCVKNCKDSA;KWOIWQOIK;FDMX;LZDS;ALKSJFA;LKJ

AKD;XJCEWQ8RJEIU;ANFVDFJSVVF’WDOIJ

;NWEFFKKGDMZXCKCERTIIUIBRI;JDSFJSMF;JLAEKF;LEQKJBNCM

FIRST OF ALL

A SECRET COURYARD???????? THAT JONAH FOUND?????????????? AND BROUGHT LUKA THERE TO PLAY???????????????????????? BUT ONLY ONCE???????????????????????????????????

I wonder how he managed to find it? But also it was to be expected that he would bring Luka bc he always wants to share what he loves with Luka (｡･ω･｡)ﾉ♡

Also just imagine the little Clemence bros running around and playing (｡･ω･｡)ﾉ♡ ♡ ♡

But like...

OH MY GOD LUKA WHAT HAVE YOU GONE THROUGH ˚‧º·(˚ ˃̣̣̥⌓˂̣̣̥ )‧º·˚

It’s so sadddddddd to think that the Clemence house got even quieter when Jonah left. Also I can’t figure out if Jonah “leaving” means that he left to go to boarding school or if he left to join the Red Army, but that was probably when Luka started to hate Jonah for abandoning him. I can’t imagine what it’s like to grow up in such a quiet and cold place and to have it grow even quieter and colder when the one person you thought cared about you left because now he has other things that are more important than you (/□＼*)・゜

Edgar + Kyle: can love between people of different social statuses exist?

The rest of these aren’t released at the moment I wrote this, so I’m mainly just going to be addressing my predictions!

So it’s clear that Jonah and MC are considered to be from different social ranks, even though MC is “Alice the Second” and has the power to nullify magic. She’s probably considered as a “commoner” in the Red Territory, so I can see why it would be difficult for Jonah and MC to get married.

And you know what else this reminds me of??? If we look at Seth’s route, we finally find out that the whole reason Cradle got divided into two was because a Red noble fell in love with a girl from a different social rank. And that romance tore a country apart, so.

Dean + Dalim: about family

Aight here we go. Are Dean and Dalim really family??? Do we finally get to find out??? Or at least get some sort of clue??? Bc I’m torn between the theory that they’re twins with amnesia or if Dean was some sort of clone created by the Magic Tower when they experimented on Dalim. And I have no idea when their routes are gonna be released, so I really hope we get more hints throughout each Ever After route.

Lancelot: Jonah’s tears

THIS IS THE SECOND MINI TALK THAT WILL DESTROY ME AFTER THE LUKA + SIRIUS ONE.

Also this is a reminder that Lancelot was probably the only one who has seen Jonah at his weakest before MC came along. It’s probably to be expected, since they’ve known each other for literally more than half their lives and also since Lancelot saved Jonah.

And technically Luka has known Jonah for the longest time, but I doubt that Jonah will ever show weakness in front of Luka because he considers himself as Luka’s protector, but it’s different in front of Lance. I feel like he can show his weaker side to Lance, and it just emphasizes how deep the relationship between them is.

SO GET READY FOR THE JONALOT FEELS WHEN THIS ONE COMES OUT.

Jonah: what is your ideal proposal?

OK I feel like this one is either gonna be super romantic or super cheesy. Or both, considering the type of person that Jonah is. But I’m gonna love it no matter what bc 1) Jonah can make even the most embarrassing situations funny and touching and 2) I’m too weak for my mille-feuille boi.

.

The screenshots for the “Peek at Romance” thing is here:

[Translation:

My dear Queen of Hearts, Jonah Clemence.

Jonah: In that party, every heir of the Clemence family will...

Jonah: Publicly introduce his fiancee, receive the acknowledgment and blessing of the whole clan, and finally step into the halls of marriage.

“What is a happy ending?”

--It’s when, the person who cannot be replaced becomes family.

Luka: Even though my brother is troublesome, and sometimes overly enthusiastic, but from now on please take care of him.

--It’s when, you become allies with the person you met.

Levie: Who hurt MC!? I’ll destroy that guy...!

Jonah: Calm down, Levie Castell. See who’s your true enemy clearly!

When he couldn’t provide an answer, it made tears overflow from his eyes.

And--while looking for an answer, it’s also possible to lose something.

Dalim: Thanks. Goodbye, princess.

Dean: I couldn’t ask any of the things I’ve been wondering before he ran...

But even so, we will still advance forward bravely.

This is all to receive the answer--to have a happy ending.

Jonah: From now on, everyone will see you as...

Jonah: The Queen of Heart’s...and also the head of the Clemence family’s wife.

Jonah: But, when there’s no one else, and when it’s just us two.

Jonah: We’ll become Jonah and MC again, and we can love each other as much as we like.

Jonah: I love you, MC.

No matter what happens, he, who is the most beautiful and pure in the world...

Will only accept a future that is even better than a happy ending...!]

I just...literally cannot express my love for this summary.

First of all I’m just gonna talk about the tone. Right off the bat MC calls him “my dear Queen” and it was just. So. CUUUUUUUUUUTE.

Also, the question and theme of “a happy ending” is brought up, and the rest of the sneak peek answers that question (it’s when the people you love become your family and the people you meet becomes your allies), but also explores how they could find those answers (Jonah crying when he couldn’t find an answer and advancing forward bravely because they just want their happy ending). And finally we finish it off with a super Jonah-like statement, announcing that he’ll accept no less than the most perfect ending of them all!

Moving on to the information revealed...it’s pretty cool how there’s a special party for the next head of the Clemence family when they’re ready to announce their marriage and gain approval. Also, it’s kinda wild to think that Jonah will eventually become a head of the family just like his father and his grandfather before that.

AND THE PART WITH LUKA AND LEVIE ARE LITERALLY SO ADORABLE. LIKE, LUKA INSULTING JONAH BUT ALSO LEAVING HIM TO MC AND LEVIE DEFENDING MC FROM PPL WHO WOULD HARM HER IS 10/10 PERFECT

Also it seems that Dean and Dalim’s backstories might be explored more but won’t be resolved just yet. I guess we really do have to wait until their routes get released to find out.

In short, this was an amazing summary of the route. WHY DO I HAVE TO WAIT ANOTHER MONTH UNTIL I CAN FINALLY READ THE WHOLE THING???????????????????????????

.

Also FYI, this is all completely new to me. For the other characters’ sequels, I played it through on Ikerev JP bc I can’t wait until the releases in the TW and English version that’s like, a year later. But I didn’t read Jonah’s sequel bc my Japanese isn’t super good and I wanted to read my man’s story in a language that I can completely understand so I literally have no idea of what to expect apart from what I found out in the campaign release :3

Also also I’m probably gonna be posting for every part in the story I’m going through BC I JUST LOVE JONAH THAT MUCH. I guess it would make up for my inactivity this month ^^;

[autumnleaves1991-blog]

Day 6: Carpet- Santiago ‘Pope’ Garcia

Day 6: Carpet - Santiago ‘Pope’ Garcia 

Prequel now available: The Test Results 

November Writing Challenge 

Day 5: Holy - Llewyn Davis 

Monday 

“So I’ve been thinking querida, how do you feel about putting carpet on the floor of the nursery? I just don’t want the baby to fall and get hurt because of the hardwood.” 

You blinked staring at your husband, “Santi, baby are you serious? You want to put down carpet in the nursery so if they fall it might not hurt as bad? Baby the whole house is hardwood…” 

“Yeah I know, but they will probably be spending a lot of time in there and I was just thinking it might be a good idea. I already talked to the guys about it and they said they would help.” Santi grins at you. 

“Wait...you are going to have your buddies from Delta Force come to our house and put down carpet in the nursery? You don’t even want to hire someone to install it? Baby that’s insane!” you shout at him before pushing yourself out of the kitchen chair to walk to the kitchen. 

The second you stand, Santiago rushes out of his own seat to hold you. “Querida you need to take it easy you-” 

“I swear to god Garcia, women have been having babies for centuries. I am not going to get injured walking from the table to the kitchen. Santi you need to calm down, you have turned the whole damn house into a baby proof fortress, nothing is going to happen to me or our daughter, ok?” you press your hands against his chest before waddling the rest of the way to the kitchen. 

Santiago takes a deep breath before following you into the kitchen, “Ok, how about we make a compromise? I will lay off on being an overprotective papa bear and you will let me and the guys put carpet in the nursery.” 

You laugh out loud, visualizing your husband as a bear defending the house before you turn to face him again, “Ok...deal you and the guys can put carpet in the nursery.” 

Santi puts his fist in the air and grabs you into his arms, kissing you passionately. Your daughter begins kicking wildly, and Santi laughs before leaning down and rubbing your swollen belly, “you hear that mija, your papa is going to make your room safe for you,” he whispers before placing a kiss on your belly. He stands back up before kissing you again briefly, “I’m gonna go call Frankie and the guys, this weekend baby the nursery will have carpet!” 

You shake your head watching him go off. Good lord what did you just agree too. 

Thursday 

You're sitting on the couch, elevating your feet, watching TV when your phone beeps signifying a text message. Santi and Frankie had gone to the store to pick out the carpet and order the supplies for Saturday. You open the phone and snort when you see a picture of a very annoyed Frankie Morales holding up two basically identical colors of cream carpet. 

Which one do you like better? - Hubby 

You are tempted to reply and let him know they look exactly alike but you know better. 

The one on the left. - Wifey 

Hmmm…. But that one isn’t as soft. - Hubby 

You roll your eyes, how the hell would you know that. You type back a reply. 

The one on the right then. - Wifey 

Hmmmm...but it’s quite a bit darker than the other one. -Hubby 

The look on Frankie’s face is beginning to make sense. 

Pick which one you like then Santi. -Wifey 

…. Ok let’s go with the one on the left….no right….ugh fuck I don’t know this is hard querida, and Frankie just keeps telling me to pick. - Hubby 

You send a quick text off to Frankie.

Tell him to pick the one on the left. - Besties Wifey 

Querida, Frankie’s telling me to get the one on the left and you know he has no sense of style so I am going to pick the one on the right. Is that ok with you?- Hubby 

You shake your head laughing at your husband. 

Sounds great! :) - Wifey 

Saturday 

“Okay get together, I need all of you in the picture!” Benny’s girlfriend Mya is shouting at the guys. They’re all smiling wearing knee pads, jeans, and an assortment of colored flannel. 

You giggle to yourself watching them pose in their work gear. “Santi, baby do you really think this is the best idea, your knees…” you trail off watching the smile slip from his face. 

“Querida...I need to be able to protect our little girl, my knees will be fine. Plus with the four of us it should only take a few hours,” he kisses your head before slapping his hands together guiding the guys to the bedroom. 

It did not take them only a couple hours, four hours in and you and the other wives/girlfriends were lounging by the pool outside. Drinking lemonade and gossiping, when Mya came back out laughing outright holding a white box in her hand. 

“This is the greatest thing I have ever listened to!” she shouts holding the white box out to you. 

“Oh my god, is that….is that a baby monitor?” Madison, Will’s wife gathers closer to your side and you flip the switch on. 

“Why do you already have a baby monitor?” Ella, Frankie’s wife asks. 

“Santi wanted to be prepared for the baby, so he set it up weeks ago,” you tell them, twisting the knobs to turn up the sound. 

From the device comes the voice of your husband panting, “fuck...why is this so goddamn difficult?! This should be easy, I told her this was going to be easy.” 

“Pope, man maybe it’s time to call in a professional. I mean we’ve been working for four hours and have barely made any progress,” Will tells him. 

“Fuck no man, I told my wife we could do this and we are going to do it!” Santi shouts back. 

“Hermano, I’m not trying to sound defeatist but we literally have no idea what we're doing,” Frankie tries to comfort his best friend, “I mean we could shoot our way into the most dangerous places in the world but I know absolutely nothing about carpet.” 

“We are not giving up! Santi needs us!!...plus I bet Mya $100 we could get it done and you know how much shit she’s gonna give me if I lose,” Benny whines. 

Mya snorts into her lemonade, making the rest of you burst out laughing. “Maybe we should just take pity on them, and call in a professional,” you ask looking at the other women. 

“I can’t believe Will agreed to this, he is hopeless with anything related to fixing or maintenance. We have to call in a professional for everything!” Madison laughs. 

You all listen for a few more minutes, laughing as the guys argue before the painful grunt of your husband makes you get up. “That’s it I am ending this shit show,” you waddle into the house and go to the nursery ushering everyone out except Santi who sits on the floor on his butt looking up at you with an adorable pout. 

You walk over to him and look down at him, you bend your knees and half fall/half sit down on the ground next to him. Santi immediately looks alarmed before you raise your hand silencing him. “Baby, I know you really wanted to do this yourself but I think it’s time we call it quits and call in a professional.” 

Santi sighs loudly, “Querida, I wanted to be able to do this for you and the baby. I need her to be safe, and I really wanted to do it myself.” 

“Santiago Garcia, you look at me right now. We are safe with you, we don’t need high tech security cameras, carpeted floors, locks on every cabinet. You didn’t fail baby, sometimes it’s ok to need help.” 

“I love you querida,” he pulls you into his side placing a kiss on your cheek and rubbing your belly, “I love both of you.” 

“We love you too, now help me off this floor my butt is beginning to go numb,” you reach out to your husband who gives you a blank look. 

“I can’t get up right now querida, my knees...I think I need some ice and my pain killers.” 

You blink several times, “....you mean we are stuck here?” 

You both burst out laughing until you’ve got tears in your eyes. You gulp for air before looking at your husband again, “Don’t worry I got this,” he looks at you slightly confused before you take a deep breath shouting, “BENNY!! WILL!! FRANKIE!! HELP ME!!!” 

It sounds like bulls charging through your house when the door suddenly flies open. The look on their faces will be burned in your memory forever, panic and determination. You start laughing all over again, and when Frankie steps forward and asks what’s wrong you almost can’t get the words out, “We- we’re stu-stuck! We- we can’t ge-get up!” 

You and Santiago begin cracking up again like a couple of lunatics before the others join in, eventually helping you and Santi off the floor. Frankie holds your arm and takes you back to the living room, Benny and Will each holding a side of Santi easing him down onto the couch. 

“I took the liberty of calling a company to come out tomorrow to install the carpet,” Mya tells you, handing you your phone you had left outside. 

You thank her before plopping down on the couch next to Santi, your head resting on his shoulder. 

“Baby, you're the best,” Benny tells Mya. 

“Oh ho ho no Benny Miller, you owe me 100 bucks, and I owe you a massive I told you so!” Mya points at him.

The room bursts into laughter again. What a great way to spend a Saturday.

Day 7: Sculpted Javier Pena 

[gio-is-writing]

Two weeks ago my dad passed away, he has been on my mind everyday and I keep thinking of all the things and plans we had together that will never happen but I’m thankful for the 21 years he was with me...

I made this because I wish I could’ve had someone to hug me at the time and tell me everything was alright, did I cry writing this? you bet. Also I didn’t really proofread this because it’s 3 am but I’ll do it tomorrow hehe, I hope you all enjoy!

Jotaro x Neutral Reader

Warnings: them/they pronouns, mentions of death? grief, angst, some soft jotaro that only lives in my imagination

LOSS

First he noticed how they didn’t join him on the way to school, then the empty seat in class and no messages to let him know they were skipping. Jotaro felt something wasn’t right about today, their absence was louder than the room filled with students but he tried to not think to much about it.

He had been dating (Y/N) for some time now, it started as someone he wasn’t annoyed by then into someone he enjoyed having around to someone he felt romantic feeling for. He demanded anything for them but he still felt odd about them not telling him about skipping which was already a rare sight. The bell rang and he made his way to the rooftop, making sure to feel his cigarettes box on his pocket when he heard whispering among students, he was never one to listen to what went on with others but what he heard made him stop walking.

“I heard (Y/N)’s dad passed away this morning”

“Oh that must be why they skipped today”

Jotaro stood still and everything slowed down. Their dad passed away? (Y/N)’s family was always so welcoming and Jotaro would be lying if he said he didn’t enjoy his time at their house whenever he visited (which was pretty often) so knowing that the person that represented the closest thing to a father figure in his life was dead and gone forever made his heart sink to his stomach and a knot form at his throat but his thoughts quickly focused on (Y/N). Were they at home? Did they eat or were they so into their grief that they skipped meals?

Turning back he made his way out of the school and to their house. His head was a fuss, he couldn’t think properly and it was like his body was on autopilot. Spotting the house he was close to running but he had to regain his composure, he knew his arrival was gonna be unexpected and probably even unwanted but all he could think about was being there for them.

Stopping at the gas station near their house he brought some food for them and their family and some snacks he thought they might enjoy for later. He payed and walked out into the street again.

Walking up to the door he knocked and waited. The lock turned and the door opened slowly revealing their mom with puffy eyes and a tissue to her nose. She lifter her eyes to meet with his and then back to the floor.

“Hello Jojo” she moved aside “Please come in”

Jotaro was quick to comply and stepped inside, he felt unsure on what to do or how to act, he had never dealt with this kind of situation before.

“I’m sure you heard about what happened” she said lowly fidgeting with her hands

“I have” he said in the softest voice he could manage “I’m sorry for your loss ma’am, I brought you some food”

“I appreciate it Jojo, thank you so much sweetie” she gave him a slight smile grabbing the bag from him “(Y/N)’s in their room, I’m sure they need some comfort right now”

He nodded and went for the hallway to their room but after a couple steps he turned back to their mother.

“Mrs. (L/N)?”

“Yes Jojo?”

He got closer and to (Y/N)’s mom surprise, he hugged her. Her eyes watered at the gesture and she hugged back before pulling away with both hands in his arms.

“If there’s anything me and my family can do for you, please let me know” Jotaro said with a genuine expression.

“Thank you Jojo, it means a lot”

The teen once again nodded his head and made his way to (Y/N)’s room. Knocking he heard a muffled reply so he opened the door slightly. On the bed they laid under blankets, their red glassy eyes turning to see who entered and seeing who stood at the door frame got them choking back a sob.

“Jojo...” they cried out “He’s gone forever”

Jotaro was quick to enter the room closing the door behind him and sitting beside them on the bed, he heard their muffled sobs into the pillow under them and he placed a hand on their head, running his fingers through their hair.

“He won’t be here for my graduation or to help me when I need him, he’s never coming back”

“Come here” Jotaro said getting closer to them and opening his arms for a much needed hug

Shuffling around, (Y/N) sat and wrapped their arms around his torso, sobbing into his chest as he rubbed his hands on their back slowly. Hearing the hurt in their cried made Jotaro want to tear up himself but he had to be there for them right now, they needed strength. He ran his hands up and down their back until they calmed down enough to breath slowly and just have a few stray tears run down their eyes.

“You don’t have to say anything” Jotaro whispered “You’re strong (Y/N), he always said so.”

The arms around each other tightened and he placed a kiss on top of their head. The sun outside the window hid behind the clouds and the room darkened slighly around them, the day was colder than most for a November evening but they stayed warm next to each other.

“Thank you Jojo, thank you for being here”

“I’ll always be here for you”

[raleighcarrera]

be mine

platinum | raleigh carrera x mc (cadence dorian)

raleigh and cadence end up on a couple’s trip together as the fifth and sixth wheels to their friends, four months after they’ve broken up.

shoutout to jade for letting me borrow her rcd mc florencia/platinum mc dom and shoutout to pj for letting me borrow her platinum mc ascendance ! the gang’s all here this valentine’s day 💕

tags: @choicesarehard ; @empressazura; @dakotawinchester ; @zigtheeortega ; @pixeljazzy ; @grigori-girl 

~9k words | E (18+)

avery was uncharacteristically squirrelly when she pressed him about who else was coming on the trip with them, evading her questions as best as he could while he herded her onto the plane.

“i don’t want to be a third wheel to you and ascendance,” cadence insisted for what was surely the sixth or seventh time since he’d first invited her along, “or a fifth wheel once seth and florencia show up, either.”

“would you relax?” avery said, waving the flight attendant over and practically shoving a drink into her hand as they settled into their seats across from each other, “seth and florencia are bringing someone with them, too. it’s going to be fine.”

“it’s not going to be fine if whoever they bring is a weirdo,” she pointed out, but sipped obligingly from her champagne all the same, sighing dramatically when the doors closed and the plane started to roll down the tarmac. “then the four of you will be off doing valentine’s day things together and i’ll be stuck entertaining some creep.”

“they wouldn’t just bring some creep,” avery assured her, rolling his eyes. “and even if they did, at least you’ll be entertaining them in palm springs, yeah? i don’t think i could’ve lasted another day below zero.”

that was true. new york had been freezing, lately, with a particularly unrelenting winter that seemed unlikely to melt into spring anytime soon, groundhog predictions be damned. as the plane took off into the air, her toes had yet to thaw out where they were like ice in her sneakers. 

avery’s girlfriend’s vacation house in palm springs was going to be a welcome respite from the place she was desperate to get away from, even if she was going to have to spend her first valentine’s day alone there -- or, worse, with some strange guy or girl she wasn’t ready to entertain.

it had been four months since her breakup with raleigh, and it wasn’t like she hadn’t tried to date again. she had. each of her friends had begged to be given the chance to set her up until she finally relented and subsequently regretted ever leaving her apartment -- every single miserable dinner date she went on felt like trying to walk around in the wrong size shoes, pinchy and unfamiliar and strange.

each of the people she’d dated were perfectly nice in their own way, but they weren’t raleigh. they never could be.

the realization had admittedly left her feeling a little glum. she’d expected to be over him, by now, or at the very least, to not still be so torn up about their breakup, especially when she was the one who’d forced his hand.

man up and make a commitment, or let me go. the words felt bitter as she recalled them, and she sighed when avery kicked her underneath the table between them, eyebrows drawing together.

“oi, none of that this weekend. this trip is going to be fun.”

“i know,” cadence said, her eyes on the window beside her. as fun as it could be, she supposed. “and i really appreciate you trying to take my mind off things, but...”

avery’s eyes softened. “yeah,” he allowed, “i get it. but i really do want you to try to have a good time. a break from new york will be good for you.”

“i hope so.” though she doubted it. if she couldn’t get raleigh out of her mind when she was home, a trip across the country was unlikely to make a difference. 

the drive to ascendance’s from the airport was short, and after only a few minutes cadence had the pleasure of watching the two of them embrace like it’d been years since they last saw each other, kissing enthusiastically while she lingered in the foyer with her suitcase.

ascendance grinned widely at her when they broke apart, laughing a little as avery kept her wrapped in his arms, lifted up off the floor with her bare feet dangling. “hey! it’s so good to see you again. you can take any room you want, okay?”

the wet sound of kissing didn’t disappear even after she rushed upstairs, dragging her suitcase down the long hallway until she could find the bedroom farthest away from the noise. 

she shut the door behind her on an airy, sun-drenched guest bedroom draped in billowy linens, the open window looking down at the pool and sprawling backyard. palm trees decorated the property, and the sight of the view alone was enough to calm her down just a little, so that her stomach wasn’t clenched into tight knots for the first time in weeks when she kicked off her shoes and sank into the bed.

her hands scrubbed across her face, rubbing at her eyes. she was makeup-free from the flight and knew she’d need to get ready before whatever chaos she was inevitably going to be dragged into tonight, when seth and florencia and their mystery guest would get in, but just then, she was far too exhausted to move. 

figuring that a nap wouldn’t hurt, she slipped under the blankets in the sweats she’d worn on the plane and immediately fell fast asleep.

the sun was setting when she woke up, a commotion downstairs alerting her to the fact that seth and florencia had gotten in early; she heard a champagne cork pop and cheers echo out just as she slid to the edge of the mattress and stretched, arching her back and righting her clothes where they’d pulled out of place in her sleep.

running a hand through her messy hair, she walked out into the hallway without thinking twice about it, figuring she’d find out the plan for the evening before she started getting ready.

cadence regretted the thought as soon as she paused at the top of the stairs. “hey, sleeping beauty!” seth crowed, throwing his hands up in the air, but she couldn’t bring herself to greet him when her eyes were focused on the mop of brown hair standing just behind him, a head taller and a commanding presence she’d recognize in any room, in any city, in any place. 

the person seth and florencia had brought with them was raleigh.

he smiled sheepishly at her, rubbing at the back of his neck before lifting his hand in an awkward wave. “hey.”

“hey,” she said slowly, resuming her walk down the stairs as if on autopilot, even though every nerve-ending in her body was screaming at her to turn back around and go to her room and put on something hotter, damnit. if she’d known she was going to be seeing raleigh today she would have taken the entire six hour flight in valentino haute couture and sat ramrod straight not to wrinkle it.

but she didn’t, and so there she was, makeup free in sweats, dreaming of all the long, drawn-out and painful ways she was going to murder both avery and seth for blindsiding her. 

“i’m gonna go pour drinks,” seth said decisively, and cadence only barely caught the look florencia shot her before they both turned away to tend to the champagne bottle in her hands, leaving her alone in the foyer with raleigh. 

it had been a few months since she saw him last. they ran into each other only once after she picked up all her things from his apartment, the shoes and makeup and guitar picks and jewelry she’d left strewn all over the place because there was no rules at raleigh’s and she’d gotten too comfortable with that. she’d spotted him from across the room at a party she didn’t want to be at and ducked out the back door before he could see her, too, walking home thirty blocks in the cold, hiccuping sobs that blew clouds of her breath into the air.

he looked more or less the same as he had in november. raleigh’s hair was still pretentiously, purposefully disheveled, his clothes the rich form of messy, distressed and slouchy that looked effortlessly fashionable, with that gaudy rolex on his wrist and hints of his tattoos peeking out at the edge of his collar.

the expression on his face gave nothing away when he said, “i didn’t know you’d be here.”

“we don’t have to talk,” she answered, because they didn’t, and she pursed her lips and looked away just as avery and ascendance entered the house from the patio door, their clasped hands swinging between their bodies.

“oh... my god?” avery said, recovering quickly from the shock on his face, his eyebrows arching to his hairline. ascendance looked to be hiding a nervous laugh behind her hand. “raleigh, good to see you. this is... a surprise.”

“it sure is,” cadence agreed with a wide, fake smile, rage pulsing in her temples. fine -- maybe she’d only have to kill seth.

as if on cue, seth reentered the foyer with the bottle of champagne still in his hands.  “oooookay, here’s the -- oh, hey avery -- ascendance, thanks for having us.” florencia passed out glasses while seth leaned in for welcome hugs, and cadence stood there numbly as the reality of the situation started to sink in.

she and raleigh were the other couple, the people who’d be paired up all weekend while the rest of their friends enjoyed the time away. she was going to be stuck with the guy who’d dumped her, on valentine’s day, and there was nothing she could do about it.

when seth stopped beside her, she made a show of wrapping him up into a bear hug, squeezing him as close and as tightly as she could. “you’re dead to me,” cadence murmured calmly into his ear, smiling innocently again when he pulled away nervously and taking one of the waiting glasses of champagne from florencia’s outstretched hand.

she stared at it for a second, unseeing, before lifting the glass to her lips and draining it in one go, knocking back the champagne while silently lamenting the fact that it wasn’t something stronger. but there was probably no amount of alcohol in the world that was going to make this weekend feel bearable. 

“i’m gonna go get ready,” she announced to no one, dashing back up the stairs as quickly as she dared.

ascendance found her a few minutes later in full meltdown mode, flicking frantically through the outfits she brought for something to wear to dinner.

“obviously i had no idea they’d be bringing him,” she said, sitting on cadence’s bed and rolling her eyes, “and i hope they didn’t know avery was bringing you, or, like, what the fuck is wrong with them?”

“please don’t even get me started,” cadence sighed, “or i really think i might kill someone tonight. which dress do you think is hotter?”

she gestured frantically at the two pieces she’d laid out over the top of her entire dumped-out suitcase, pressing the heels of her hands into her eyes until she saw stars. getting ready was going to be impossible. if she wore something too sexy it was going to look like she was trying to get back at raleigh and if she dressed too casually it was going to look like she was trying too hard to seem unaffected. the whole situation was fucked.

“i think i have something you can wear,” ascendance said slowly, “if you have the right shoes. but are you sure you want to --”

“i can’t go home,” she cut in, groaning. “that’s worse than staying. no offense -- i want to stay, i just don’t want --”

“i know,” ascendance said sympathetically, “i get it. why don’t you start on your makeup while i pull this dress out?”

“okay,” cadence sighed miserably, and then she was alone again, staring at the mess of clothes before her. 

she let herself have exactly ten seconds of wallowing and dramatically lamenting why me before she squared her shoulders and sprung into action, digging her makeup bag out of the chaos covering the bed.

okay. step one -- all she had to do was get ready. you’ve done this a thousand times before. just get ready, and go downstairs. no tears.

her hands shook as she sat down in front of the vanity.

fuck this. she wished dom was with her -- she would know what to do. at the very least, she’d have a xanax to offer.

you will not believe where i am, cadence texted her, stomach squirming. part of her would’ve given anything, just then, to be where dom was, with shane, working on whatever film they were making in whatever remote location he’d dragged her to, if only so she wouldn’t have to face the disaster waiting for her downstairs.

strip club? dom answered almost immediately, her words enough to make cadence crack a genuine smile. she felt a little calmer as she quickly filled her friend in on the situation.

fuck him, was dom’s advice, when she was done. ruin his life!!!! is that even a question? squeeze your tits up to your neck if you have to

thanks for the encouragement! cadence wrote back, setting her phone aside when only a sarcastic string of nonsensical emojis came back in response.

she did feel fortified, then, to make it to dinner, and got her makeup on in almost record time, a genuine smile fixed on her face when ascendance helped her get dressed and zipped her into the outfit she’d set aside, a stunning red minidress that was equal parts short and tight, a gentle ruffle at the hem flaring out under her ass.

they were late to dinner, but it was only in the backyard; ascendance had planned for a private chef to come to the house and cook for them so they wouldn’t have to worry about cameras following them around, and in hindsight, cadence could have kissed her for her forward thinking. 

the setup was still elaborate when they made their way outside. ascendance had gone all out in planning the evening -- the table was set with candles and flowers down the length of it, the lawn lit with string lights and music playing somewhere, softly in the distance.

thankfully everyone was already at their seats when they made their way across the grass. avery pulled out the chair across from him for ascendance, and cadence took the seat at the head of the table, opposite raleigh, who was all the way down the other end and looking right at her, a crooked smile on his face and an eyebrow arched at her outfit.

she pointedly ignored him as she dropped down into her seat and picked up the bread roll waiting on her plate, squeezing ascendance’s knee gratefully under the table when she silently passed her roll over, too.

conversation was slow to start, but ascendance kept the food and drinks coming and when cadence was halfway through her third tequila soda she felt markedly less murdery, at least enough to actually talk to seth again, who was still eyeing her warily when she asked, “so, how’s the movie coming?”

“it’s good,” he answered modestly, “they tore down our sets, like, the day filming wrapped, so we did some of the reshoots on location in cordonia. that was cool.”

“they took us on a tour of the palace,” florencia added, though cadence couldn’t look at her without catching raleigh in her peripheral vision, so she kept her eyes on seth, even when he grinned widely at her between bites of the appetizer, a sure sign that there was trouble to come.

“ryan actually asked me about you,” he said casually, “a lot.”

her eyebrows pulled together in surprise. “ryan summers? i think the last time i saw him was when the odyssey dropped.”

“well -- i guess he knows we’re close,” seth shrugged, and, fuck it. she risked a glance at florencia and found her picking her way through the salad; out of the corner of her eye, cadence was pretty sure raleigh had tuned into their conversation, too. “he said he heard you were single.”

warmth flooded her face. she lifted her drink and took another measured sip of it. “did you give him my number?” 

now it was seth’s turn to look surprised. “do you want me to?”

“yeah,” she said without thinking, turning her eyes back to her plate immediately. “florencia, how’s pilot season going?”

the tequila sodas went down easily after that. eventually, when the meal finished and she stood from her chair, cadence realized she was too drunk to be upright, wobbling precariously on the lawn in her heels. her head swam as she did her best to hold still, though judging by the look ascendance was giving her, she wasn’t quite managing it.

“you guys wanna head to a bar?” avery asked, and she looked up just in time to catch raleigh’s eye across the circle, knowing they were having the exact same thought at the exact same time.

her team was going to kill her if she was photographed with raleigh. more than that, the internet would destroy her, and she would absolutely deserve it. she shook her head.

“we’ll hang back,” raleigh said, either not noticing the glances the others were exchanging behind his back or tactfully ignoring them, “you guys go.”

then they were alone. 

“i don’t want to talk to you,” cadence said bluntly, as soon as the others had gone, the half-bottle of tequila she’d drank obliterating her filter completely.

“that’s fair,” raleigh allowed, looking around the backyard -- which was slowly spinning in her field of vision -- before asking, “can i help you upstairs?”

“you can fuck off.” she spun on her heel to storm away and promptly tumbled down onto the ground, face planting into the grass. fuck.

in an instant, raleigh was down on his knees beside her, one large hand wrapped gently around her arm to pull her upright. “hey, are you okay? jesus, that looked bad.”

“i’m fine,” cadence groaned, yanking her arm out of his grip, “and i don’t need your help, and even if i did, you wouldn’t be helping me anyway. all you care about is yourself.”

it took her a minute, but she made her way back to her feet, kicking her heels off for better balance. silently, raleigh picked them up for her, giving her a long look before muttering, “come on, let’s get you inside.”

they trudged back to the house in silence, side-by-side, cadence’s steps slow and awkward with the world fuzzy around her. raleigh hovered as close to her personal space as he dared their entire way up the stairs, all the way down the hallway until they were both alone in her room.

everything she owned was still strewn across the bed. she groaned when she saw the pile of clothes obstructing the mattress, then threw herself down in the vanity chair and poked around for her makeup wipes instead.

raleigh lingered in the doorway, watching her. “are you gonna be okay?”

she scoffed, yanking the package of makeup wipes open and pulling one out forcefully. “like you give a shit.”

“would you stop it? you have every right to be pissed at me but i’m trying to help, here. are you going to be sick?”

“sick of you,” she said, scrubbing the eyeliner off her eyes in a way her glam team definitely would not approve of, with how she was tugging at her face.

but they weren’t here. raleigh was. and she needed him to go, before she said something stupid.

when she dropped the makeup wipe into the trash at her feet, cadence found raleigh’s arms folded across his chest where he was still leaning in the open door frame. he was staring at her through slightly narrowed eyes, looking either annoyed or pensive -- it was hard to read him, now, considering the drinks she’d had and how long it’d been since they were last alone together.

maybe she’d never be able to read raleigh’s expression ever again. 

raleigh dragged a hand across his mouth, rubbing at his jaw before shrugging helplessly and saying, “i do actually want us to be friends, eventually.”

“don’t count on it,” cadence scoffed, turning back to the vanity mirror for a fresh makeup wipe and the eyeliner on her other eye. 

there was silence for a long moment before he asked, “is that really how you feel?” raleigh’s voice was quieter, this time. he was less sure of himself, maybe.

or maybe she was projecting, leaning into her own wishful thinking.

either way, she faltered, pursing her lips as she stared at her streaky, half-made up face in the mirror before her. 

no. it wasn’t what she wanted. but evidently she wasn’t able to have what she wanted, so a clean break should have been the next best thing, right? space to get over raleigh in peace, no matter how long that took. 

when she didn’t say anything, he softly continued, “it’s just that... i miss talking to you, you know? other people don’t always get it.”

irritation flashed within her, sudden and sharp. that was so like raleigh, to want all of the emotional benefits of her companionship without any of the responsibilities that came with them. “i can’t be your friend right now,” she snapped, shutting her eyes briefly when the way her head turned too quickly made the room start to spin again. “maybe ever, okay?”

there was quiet for so long that she forced her eyes open to check and see whether or not raleigh had left, peeking one eye open slowly, just a crack. cadence sighed when she saw he was still standing in the doorway, staring at her with that dark, inscrutable gaze. 

raleigh cleared his throat before he said, “i’ve been trying to give you space. obviously i knew you wouldn’t want to talk again right away, but in a few months, i thought...”

how embarrassing. she turned away in shame, biting down on the inside of her cheek. 

she wondered how long it’d taken him, to get over their relationship. had he felt they could have been friends again, like nothing ever happened, in one month? three weeks? a few days?

“well, you thought wrong. so please just leave me alone this weekend.” cadence kept her eyes trained on the wall by the closet on the other side of the room, refusing to turn back around. she could feel the tequila starting to work its way back up in her stomach.

“okay,” raleigh said finally, and she heard his hand tap on the doorframe with finality. “night, cadence.” 

only when she heard the soft sound of his footsteps on the carpet fade away into nothing did she get up, gently shutting the door to her room and slumping back against it to thump her head against the wood quietly once she was alone.

fuck.

that certainly hadn’t gone as planned.

in the morning, she woke up with a pounding headache, someone heavy sitting on her legs on the bed. the smell of coffee forced her eyes open, and cadence sat up slowly until her blurry vision focused on seth, who grinned at her again before passing her a mug that was warm to the touch in her hands when she reached out for it.

“morning,” he said, looking far too obnoxious and smug for someone who’d been out later than she had the night before. “i thought you might want to know that raleigh asked if i was really going to give your number to ryan at breakfast just now.”

“i’m going to throw up on you,” cadence mumbled, but stared into the coffee in her hands instead, lifting it to her lips for a careful sip that immediately burned her mouth. “wait -- what?”

“any idea why he’d ask me that?” seth smirked, shifting away deftly when she lifted her leg underneath the covers and kicked out at him. 

“because he’s a bad person and you’re an even worse one?” she suggested, slumping back down to the mattress with a huff when seth rolled to the other edge of the bed, out of reach. “i hope you don’t think i’m ever going to forgive you for bringing him here.”

seth cringed. “florencia said i’m lucky to be alive.” he shifted closer tentatively when she laughed. “i really didn’t know you’d be here, though. i thought you were going upstate to write.”

“i went last month,” she sighed, “it was miserable. even colder than the city and more depressing than my apartment.” the air b&b had been too empty and too quiet, just like her place back home. 

“well, we didn’t all conspire to pull a parent trap on you, i promise,” seth said, and she rolled her eyes at him before disappearing back into her coffee, hoping the caffeine would mitigate the hangover that was starting to feel miserable. “but i also didn’t think you were going to get drunk and start a huge fight or whatever.” 

“is that what he said?” she asked, glancing at the closed door of her bedroom before looking back at seth curiously, “that we had a huge fight?” she had been drunk, but the argument she’d had with raleigh had felt tame in comparison to some of the blowouts they’d gotten into when they were together, including the final explosive screaming match that’d broken them up in the fall.

“kinda,” seth shrugged, “but you know how he is. always downplaying everything.”

“yeah.” her nails tapped against the ceramic mug as she strained to listen to whatever was going on downstairs, but if there were still people in the kitchen, she couldn’t hear them, anymore. “are you going to give my number to ryan?”

“i already did,” seth answered with a dismissive flick of his hand, sending a wave of relief through her. there was something comforting in knowing that the decision was out of her hands, and that she wouldn’t have to admit, out loud, that she was reconsidering the offer after talking to raleigh last night. “but that so isn’t the point.”

“please don’t start,” cadence practically begged, “i literally don’t have it in me to think about this today.” or ever, she silently added. the what-ifs of her and raleigh’s relationship would prove to be enough to consume her, if she let them. she’d spent too many hours, over the last few months, thinking about them -- wondering how he felt, questioning whether or not he was thinking about her, torturing herself guessing where he was or who he was with. life had finally been able to start to distract her with other things again: work, friends, social events. she couldn’t afford to take a step backwards.

any question or comment he’d made was probably done in passing. he didn’t care who anyone gave her number to. 

“but --” seth tried, cutting off with a sigh when she shook her head at him, eyes wide and pleading. “fine. well... there’s more coffee in the kitchen, okay? come out to the pool when you feel like it.”

she stared off into space as she finished what was left in the mug seth had brought her, rubbing her calves together under the sheets to try and determine whether or not she needed to shave her legs again. it’ll give you some time to stall, said a voice in her head helpfully, and she headed to the shower without thinking twice about it, eager to explore ascendance’s stock of beauty products.

everyone was out by the pool when she finally emerged with her sunglasses and bikini on. the boys were splashing in the water, and cadence kept her eyes lowered as she spread out in one of the empty lounge chairs next to ascendance. 

“so,” ascendance murmured, as soon as she got comfortable, “i heard last night was a disaster.”

cadence rolled her eyes again. “good to know raleigh is still the nosey little gossip he always was.”

“if you seriously thought he wasn’t going to tell everyone you hardcore unloaded on him last night, you’re delusional,” ascendance pointed out fairly, making her pout where she was sitting next to her friend. 

fine. “i just didn’t think it was news every time we got into an argument,” she muttered, tilting her head back against the lounge chair, squinting into the sun.

“it’s always news, with you two.” 

with a sigh, cadence looked away, squeezing her eyes shut against the spots that were suddenly appearing like fireworks. evidently all sense of self preservation had completely abandoned her this weekend, both where raleigh was concerned and otherwise. “you’re not really going to make me ask about it, are you?”

she turned her head and found ascendance grinning at her. “would i do that to you?” she asked, rolling over onto her side and inching her chair closer. her voice dropped to a near whisper, and when she dipped her head so her eyes were visible over the tops of her own sunglasses cadence could see how eager she was to fill her in on the news. “the man is a mess,” ascendance said bluntly, looking almost excited about it.

despite her best efforts not to care, she couldn’t stop herself from feeling hopeful and a little relieved, just to hear that. “really?”

“yeah. i don’t think he ever thought you’d be so upset with him, and for so long. it’s kind of embarrassing, honestly. like -- for his soul.” 

“well -- what did he think, that i was just going to be, like, okay, see you? when he picked up all his shit from my apartment while i was on a shoot and told entertainment tonight we had mutual differences. what the fuck was he thinking?”

“beats me,” ascendance scoffed, slowly shaking her head. “i told him he was out of his mind many times. you know how he is. asking all of us for advice on how to talk to you when you made it clear you wanted him to leave you alone.”

“it’s just like -- what could he even possibly have to say to me, you know? after all this time. he had plenty of chances to text me, or something.”

“i don’t think he even knows,” ascendance said. “it just kills him to think anyone’s mad at him. we’re all like that, in a way.”

“i hate that you’re right,” she sighed, gaze drifting out at the sprawling view in the backyard. “he doesn’t care that it’s me. he’s just too much of a narcissist to have someone dislike him.”

“hang on, i didn’t say that,” ascendance mused, pursing her lips. “he definitely cares more because it’s you. try talking to him for ten minutes, you’ll see.”

“i honestly don’t think i can stomach looking at him for ten minutes. it’s like --”

“oi! ace, cadence -- get in here, yeah?”

they turned in unison to find avery grinning, splashing water and waving them into the pool. florencia and seth were sitting on the stairs, and her eyes scanned the rest of the space to slowly come to land on raleigh, treading water behind avery, already staring at her.

“come on,” ascendance smiled, reaching for her wrist and tugging cadence out of her chair before she could protest, yanking her forward towards the edge of the pool.

with a splash, they both jumped in, and cadence was left hovering by the wall as ascendance immediately swam over to avery and jumped into his arms, the two of them spinning away into the deep end with loud laughter.

raleigh lifted his hand to wave awkwardly at her. with a sigh, she swam over, sparing only a brief glance at seth and florencia, who were still parked on the stairs with absolutely no intention of moving and saving her anytime soon.

“you sleep alright?” raleigh asked, as soon as she was close enough to hear him. the expression on his face was sincere, his eyes resting respectfully on her face.

cadence fidgeted as she tried not to stare in return, though the broad planes of raleigh’s chest had always been a distraction -- worse when they were bisected with gold chains and dripping with water, gleaming under the sun. “yeah, i guess. sorry i got drunk and screamed at you or whatever.”

raleigh tipped his head back with a loud laugh, one large palm resting against an equally large pectoral muscle. with his eyes crinkled together under the sun, she gave in and let herself stare at his fingers, glaring bitterly at the tattoos that swirled up his forearm. asshole.

“i think i actually really deserved it, so it’s fine.” when their eyes met again he seemed uncharacteristically uncertain, his trademark shield of confidence momentarily lowered. “i feel like an idiot for not realizing that’s how you must’ve felt sooner.”

cadence shook her head. “that’s not your problem.” having an ex-boyfriend was new to her, let alone one she had to work in the same industry with and live a few neighborhoods away from, the tinny call of the subway conductor’s voice announcing the stops still making her cringe down into her takeaway coffee, even months later -- but she was pretty sure none of this was par for the course. in her (admittedly limited, defined mostly by movies) experience, ex-boyfriends didn’t concern themselves with the aftermath, and raleigh shouldn’t have been any exception.

“i know that.” something unidentifiable flashed in his eyes, and when he winced, she realized it was akin to... pain. uncomfortableness, at the very least. “but, still. i hate thinking that you felt that way... about me. or because of me, even. it’s just shitty.”

“you don’t have to feel guilty,” cadence said, that same prickly annoyance rising up in her again, too suddenly to contend with before the rude words reached her lips. “i know you think highly of yourself, but i’ve had worse things happen to me than being broken up with before.”

raleigh sighed heavily, shaking his head. “i’m fucking this up again. that’s not what i meant. i’m trying to apologize.”

her face contorted with confusion. “you are?”

“yeah, but -- this isn’t going like how i thought it would.” he shrugged, dragging a wet hand across the stubble on his face. he must’ve forgotten to bring a razor with him; it was growing out thicker than it usually did, even and dark across raleigh’s jaw. “i am sorry, though. for what it’s worth, i... really do miss you. and i know that you want me to fuck off and leave you alone and i’m being selfish by not doing that, but -- i just hate not talking to you. and i’m sorry.”

she was quiet for a moment, stunned into silence by his honesty. before she’d even fully had time to process what he’d said, cadence found herself saying, “you don’t have to fuck off entirely.”

raleigh blinked. “no?” he questioned, sounding unsure.

cadence shook her head. there were a million things she could’ve said -- that she’d missed him, too, that she hadn’t ever wanted to break up in the first place, that all she’d ever wanted from him was the promise of a future together -- but they all felt too revealing, making her feel as small as she had when she’d seen his first tabloid cover without her hit the newsstands at the corner store beneath her apartment building. yet again, it was like he was winning their breakup and she was acutely aware of the fact that she was not, and that she’d never be able to, because raleigh was raleigh and she was in love with him.

so she said nothing, and after a beat, he smiled hesitantly at her, eyes searching her face for some sign that she was going to snap at him again.

but she didn’t, and just as she smiled back at him a splash down at the other end of the pool startled them apart, stealing their attention away, and then they were both melding back into the group seamlessly, as though absolutely nothing had transpired between them.

that didn’t stop her from obsessing over it, though, analyzing every aspect of their interaction for the rest of the afternoon while she lounged by the pool, scrolled idly through her phone and made small talk with her friends. despite knowing that raleigh was only trying to bury the hatchet between them in order to appease his own narcissism, the small flicker of hope that had been inside her since their breakup, wondering if maybe he regretted what had happened between them, had been stoked back into a roaring fire.

as the sun started to set, she shivered, tugging at the ends of her damp hair. “i’m gonna go shower. what time’s dinner again?”

ascendance waved her off lazily. “whenever. you know these fools are going to start a fire and pull out a guitar as soon as it gets dark. just come back down when you’re done.”

she shouldered her bag and was surprised to find raleigh fall into step beside her, just outside the sliding back door of the house. “hey,” he said, shirtless still and warm from the sun, smiling brightly, “you going up?”

“yeah,” she answered, trying not to stare at him, “need a break?”

“i’m exhausted,” raleigh said, as they walked up the stairs shoulder-to-shoulder, “i think i got too much sun.”

“i know, i’m going to be washing my hair for, like, a year.” her hands pulled at the split ends, hanging in wet waves around her face. “feels like i soaked up all the chlorine and took it with me.”

silence fell as they walked down the hallway together, and cadence snuck a glance over at raleigh as soon as she realized he wasn’t stopping in front of any of the other guest room doors. they both slowed outside the last one, at the end of the row -- hers.

“listen,” raleigh said, lifting a hand to rub at the back of his neck, “i was thinking about it, and i feel like i didn’t explain myself well earlier.”

great. he’d probably seen the way she was overthinking written all over her face and realized she was holding out hope for something he had no interest in giving her. cringing, she opened her mouth to insist that she was fine when he continued, “i don’t just miss you as a friend, cadence.”

her mouth snapped shut. out of the thousands of possibilities she’d been turning over in her mind, that sentence was one that had genuinely never occurred to her. “what?”

“i felt like -- what i said, i felt like it came across, like, that i just miss being around you and talking to you like we used to... which is true, don’t get me wrong. but i didn’t mean any of it platonically. and i know that’s wrong, but...” raleigh shrugged, grinning ruefully at her. “i guess i don’t care.”

she gaped at him. after a moment, raleigh’s grin faltered. “can you say something? anything is fine.”

“sorry, i’m just, um.” cadence shook her head. what the fuck? “i’m processing.”

“look, you don’t owe me anything,” raleigh rushed to say, “i know that, and -- last night, i know you said you don’t even want to be friends, let alone anything else, so the fact that you told me i don’t have to fuck off should be enough and is way more than i deserve --”

before she could think too much about it, cadence pushed up onto her toes and kissed him, backing raleigh in against the other side of the hallway. for a split second, he stayed frozen against her; then, just as she started to panic again, he kissed her back, mouth moving urgently over hers.

raleigh’s arms wrapped around her and she carefully tip-toed forward, swaying in against his bare chest and pushing her fingers into his hair to drag his head down closer, giving herself over eagerly to the kiss. raleigh answered as if he was drowning, holding onto her so tightly her knees buckled.

the door behind him opened abruptly as they both pushed against it, and they stumbled forward into a linen closet, breaking apart clumsily as towels and washcloths rained down over their heads.

“fuck,” raleigh muttered, breathing heavily. she watched his bare chest rise and fall as he lifted a hand to run his fingers through his hair. “shit, i’m sorry.”

“don’t,” cadence interjected, similarly working to catch her breath. “i kissed you.”

“yeah, but i -- fuck, i want to be able to give you your space. i know you want that.” he seemed torn by the very idea of it.

she shook her head. “i don’t,” she rushed to explain breathlessly, “i just -- i said all that stuff because i was mad at you, and i thought... i didn’t think you wanted...”

her voice wavered and then trailed off helplessly. with her eyes, she offered raleigh the most pleading look she had, begging him to take pity on her and be the one to drive the conversation, so that she wouldn’t have to feel so achingly vulnerable, like she’d just ripped her chest wide open and laid herself bare for him to examine.

raleigh sighed. “cadence... of course i want you. i always have, ever since you threw that stupid pizza party at one in a million. but i felt like i lost the right to... to even think about this.”

cadence drew in a breath, finding it impossible to tear her eyes away from raleigh’s. he looked heartbreakingly sincere, among ascendance’s racks of askew towels, and no matter how much being with him was going to eventually, inevitably destroy her, she knew she would never, ever forgive herself for turning around now.

“you didn’t.” she watched as raleigh exhaled, relief transforming his face. “i’ve thought about it -- so much -- and i’ve wondered if you ever thought about it, too, and -- i hoped that you did? but when i didn’t hear from you, i had to assume... i mean, i thought you just moved on.”

“no,” raleigh insisted, “jesus, cadence, i could never ‘just move on.’ do you have any idea --”

she kissed him again before he could continue, and raleigh stepped forward to meet her halfway, blindly walking them both out of the closet and back across the hall to her bedroom, fumbling for the doorknob behind her back without dislodging his lips from where they were doing their very best to pull every last breath from her lungs.

he kicked the door shut when they stumbled inside together, and they fell onto her unmade bed in a tangle of damp bathing suits and sunkissed limbs, the messy sheets twisting into further disarray as they rolled around amongst the pillows.

“fuck, fuck, fuck,” raleigh bit out, crawling on top of her to press her down into the mattress, the combination of his lips on her neck and his hands on her hips wiping each and every last thought from her mind. “god, cadence.”

“raleigh,” she moaned in return, sliding her hands down the bare expanse of his back, her fingertips digging into the muscles she’d sorely missed touching, “please, i want...”

his hips bucked forward, and her voice trailed off into a gasp as he pressed against her, her legs widening to give him more room to settle in. raleigh took advantage of the space immediately, and his hips circled forward slowly in a dirty grind that made her head spin, her eyelashes fluttering as her head tipped back against the pillows.

“is this what you want?” raleigh demanded, his voice low. “can you feel how much i want you?”

“yes,” cadence breathed, palms pressing against his back, urging him forward against her, “yes, raleigh, please --”

his hands made quick work of her bikini, untying the strings at the sides of her bottoms, letting the fabric fall away beneath them as his hips thrust forward again. her back arched up off the mattress, and as soon as there was space for his hands, raleigh slipped them between her ass and the mattress, squeezing. 

“you look so fucking pretty,” he sighed, sounding almost personally offended as soon as his thigh slipped between her legs and she pushed her hips up, chasing any source of friction, “jesus, cadence.”

cadence reached up and threaded her fingers into his hair, pulling his face down for another desperate kiss. she didn’t exactly feel pretty, makeup-free and wet from the pool, flushed and panting and begging for her ex-boyfriend’s affection, but the way raleigh was looking at her made her feel like a perfect ten, as stunning as she’d ever thought she was, more glamorous than she’d be for a red carpet event.

it was exactly the same as the way he’d used to look at her, a mix of warm adoration and awe in his eyes, his pride bumping up her own self confidence until she thought she could do absolutely anything.

her forehead pressed against his as they broke apart, sharing the same ragged breaths. “i want you to fuck me,” cadence murmured, just so that she could hear the pained, punched-out groan of raleigh’s that followed the words, her gaze unfocused on where raleigh’s eyes suddenly screwed shut tightly from up close.

“anything,” raleigh promised, lifting his hips so her hands could slide his shorts off, “god, come here.”

she slipped forward down the bed, into raleigh’s waiting arms, and he pulled her in close enough that her body acted on muscle memory, opening up for him to slot into place against her in that same familiar way they’d come together so many times before. 

it was as easy as breathing -- as simple and as complicated as everything with raleigh always felt. 

raleigh’s hands planted on the mattress to give him more leverage, and he shoved his hips forward forcefully, pushing her up the bed. “fuck,” he groaned emphatically, making it impossible for her head to be anywhere else but right there, with him, “you feel so fucking good.”

she knew exactly what he meant. her romantic conquests over the last four months had been few and far between, and raleigh was scratching an itch that had been impossible to manage on her own or with anyone else -- even if she’d wanted to be with someone else, there was no one who knew him quite like he did, who knew exactly what she needed and never failed to give her everything and more.

each quick thrust nudged the headboard against the wall behind her, the sharp tilt of his hips making her tense until her whole body was shaking with how good it felt. cadence turned her face away as raleigh got the angle just right, throwing her forearm over her eyes to hide the open expression of pleasure on her face, muffling her moans into the sheets under her cheek.

“oh, don’t you dare,” he breathed, reaching for her arm and pulling it away, pinning her wrist down to the bed. her head rolled back as his hips bucked viciously, compelled by the low intensity in his voice. “look at me.”

her whole body felt hot and anxious, but her eyes blinked open obligingly and locked onto his, pinned in place by the wild look in raleigh’s gaze. 

“raleigh.” his name was a moan that felt too loud in the room, her breath hitching halfway through. a full-body shiver tripped down her spine.

above her head, his palm slid the last inch up her wrist to lace their fingers together, squeezing her hand in his.

“did you miss this?” he asked suddenly, walking his free hand up the inside of her thigh in a maddeningly slow tip-toe. his question was punctuated by a thrust that shoved the bed into the wall again.

“yes,” she groaned, “god, raleigh, i --”

“say it.” his hand paused in its path, curling tight around her thigh, fingertips digging in hard enough to bruise.

“i missed this.” the words tripped out in a needy rush, the full-body flush she could feel worsening. “i missed this, i missed you.”

“yeah,” raleigh agreed with an answering moan, bowing his head to bring his lips to her neck again as his fingers finally slid the last few inches up between her legs to touch her, the rough pad of his thumb circling in time with each swing of his hips. 

in a matter of moments she was shaking, the rough scrape of raleigh’s teeth and stubble down the column of her throat making her squirm in the sheets, her legs trembling with the way he was touching her. her nails dug into the back of his hand when she tripped over the edge, and she felt her mouth work with what was doubtlessly a mindless jumble of profanities, her brain too dizzy to work out the specifics.

cadence was only distantly aware of raleigh’s hips rocking forward, the curse words he spit out in spanish when he followed her over the edge with his teeth biting at her shoulder. her head was still spinning from the ridiculous ride of it all, and when raleigh finally exhaled, lifted his head and grinned goofily at her, his hand pushing a sweaty lock of hair off his forehead, her heart joined the party, too, seizing up with a worrying tightness before beginning to do backflips in her chest.

he rolled over carefully onto his side, pulling her with him gently until she reached out and braced her hands on his chest. “you okay?”

“pretty good,” cadence murmured honestly. she felt better than she had in a long time. her eyes swept his face curiously, desperate for an understanding of what he might have been thinking. “just tell me now if this was, like, a palm-springs-only kind of thing.”

raleigh’s wide smile faltered. he sucked his bottom lip into his mouth and she saw a flash of his teeth before he resolutely shook his head, eyes still fixed seriously on her face. there was quiet for a moment before he said, “i want to go at your pace, okay? but... i’d definitely take it all back, if i could. that fight we had -- and those things i said --” he trailed off, reaching out for her arm. “i could explain this a lot better if you give me, like, an hour.”

she laughed, smiling brightly despite the heaviness of their conversation. “sorry. i didn’t mean to ruin the afterglow.”

“no, this is important,” raleigh insisted softly, “‘cause i don’t want you to go home thinking -- whatever. and i don’t want this to be just a one-time thing. i mean, i’d love for this to be at least a ten-or-twelve-time thing before our flights tomorrow, but... ideally, uh. you know. there’d be more than that, too.”

cadence leaned in to close the distance between them, gently catching his lips in a quick kiss. as soon as their mouths brushed, raleigh relaxed against her, the tension abruptly dropping out of his limbs as his hands hesitantly came to rest on her back, tilting her in closer.

“i think that sounds great,” cadence murmured, the cautious smile that was spreading across raleigh’s lips enough to set a swarm of butterflies loose in her stomach again.

“thank god,” he sighed, “because i seriously need a break before i have to put sentences together again, cadence. you killed me.”

“oh my god,” she laughed, “shut up, you’re so absurd.”

it was a long time before they finally dragged themselves out of bed and into the shower, and an even longer time before she felt like they were presentable enough to join the group, who all looked at the both of them with shit-eating, smug grins when they sat down at the fire in ascendance’s backyard together, raleigh snagging two slices of pizza out of the box on the table and dangling one of them straight into her waiting, open mouth. 

“don’t,” cadence insisted without stopping to chew or swallow, “please keep it to yourselves.”

“what she said,” raleigh agreed, finishing his own slice of pizza in a few quick bites and passing his crust over to her wordlessly.

there was a beat of silence before seth said, “okay, no,” and then a cacophony of sound exploded around them, with each of their friends talking louder and louder over each other, shouting their questions out from around the fire. 

she leaned her head on raleigh’s shoulder, chewing thoughtfully. there was certainly still a lot more to talk about -- so many things to discuss -- but she felt more on the same page with raleigh now than ever before, his palm spread out low across the small of her back with his ring and pinky finger dipped beneath the waistband of her shorts. 

as avery and the others continued to bicker around them, raleigh turned his head and pressed his lips to her temple in a sweet kiss. “happy valentine’s day,” he murmured into her ear.

cadence glanced down at the face of his watch, shrugging. her lips curved up into her own private smile -- it wasn’t quite valentine’s day just yet, at nine o’clock on saturday night. 

“we’ve still got three more hours,” she reminded him, basking in the warmth that raleigh’s fond, indulgent laugh provided, “let’s not push it.”

[donaidk]

Nyck de Vries - Overwritten Plans

So, this one. This wouldn’t be the next one, but as I just really couldn’t start the Marcus & Callum one yet (my mood wasn’t in the right place for that one), I had to get this done so I won’t get stuck. I really hope this contains enough angst for you, as after re-reading maybe I went a bit soft in between scenes 😅 I really hope you will like it Anon, and that you don’t mind me choosing Nyck. You didn’t give me a driver, and as I was watching back the FE season while writing, he just brought all the inspiration I needed 🥺😂 Thank you so much for requesting, and have a great start to your week 🧡🧡

Slight TW: car crash (no ones hurt, non descriptive), birth (non descriptive)

Masterlist | Taglist/Queue | Request

Having to watch all the races from home felt like torture. Going from travelling with him everywhere, to just sitting around at home and keeping up with him by phone calls and the TV coverage was strange. For the first 2 months I didn’t even mind as we were getting ready for the birth, but then nothing went as we planned. Firstly, we thought Nyck would have time to be home but then by getting a seat in Formula E he had to start the season in November already. If that wasn’t enough, my due date was at the start of January, meaning he would be able to come home, but it never started. When he was about to leave for Mexico city to continue the season, I was still sporting a bump and slowly giving up on anything happening while he’s still at home. The only thing I could hope for was the baby waiting for Nyck to get back home before going to Morocco as I really didn’t want to go through something like this without him. We didn’t plan everything just for fun, but because that’s how we wanted the birth to happen.

Before he left we managed to at least get me moved into his parent’s house, as he didn’t feel content with me staying home alone. I wasn’t the happiest with the idea, but with my family living far away it was the only way to get me under 24/7 supervision. I didn’t feel like it would be needed as I was capable of everything, not really affected by the usual pregnancy symptoms, but I just gave up the fight, knowing they wanted the best for me. I would also never give up company if it was offered so nicely to me, my relationship with his family helping the situation a lot. They always made sure I knew they looked at me as part of the family, right from the first moment of Nyck introducing me to them. After hearing so many stories about the families hating each other and not accepting of their kid’s partner, I really appreciated them. Going into our life together it was a relief that I didn’t have to fear them being dismissive towards me or trying to break us apart.

“ How are you? ” I heard his voice as soon as FaceTime finally connected, but his face wasn’t visible on the screen yet. “ And don’t you dare hold back just because I have a race. ” He added, finally leaning over his phone so I could see his face, which was a bit more serious than I thought it would be.

“ I’m fine, really. I don’t feel anything else than how I’m like a whale. ” I sighed out, a smile getting onto my face just at the sight of him. “ I just hope it stays this way for the next few days. Until you get back, finally. ” I added, fixing my position a little with leaning back fully. There wasn’t anymore a position that felt relaxing while sitting or laying down, as everything was just in the way.

“ I’m flying back as soon as possible. The team knows already, and they won’t mind me leaving all the packing up for them. ” He was trying to get ready and get his suit up over the underlayer while at the same time looking at me on his phone, which made me smile. He would have been quicker probably if he focused on only one thing, but I couldn’t get myself to just wrap up our call.

“ Yeah, thanks. Usually I would say you should stay and help, but… not this time. ” I shook my head a little, looking up at his mum with a smile when she entered the living room. “ Even if I have all the help I can ask for, it’s not the same. ” A sigh got out of me as I knew his parents did everything possible. Sadly they couldn’t help with how much I was missing Nyck since he flew out to Mexico. No one could, other than him.

“ I know… we planned everything for a reason, but sometimes life doesn’t go as we want it to. ” He took the device in his hand when the suit was finally on him and he could sit down on the bed. “ At least it didn’t go wrong, just didn’t work out as we wanted. ” He added, making me nod in agreement. He was right, it could have been a lot worse if there were complications or any health problems.

“ Luckily. And we will have time before your next race. Not a lot, but at least you can get home for a bit. ” I sent him a smile before I could hear someone open the door to his room and he looked up too.

“ We’re going to need you in like five minutes. ” I could hear his trainer talking while saw him nodding at the info before looking back down at his phone. I could see that he didn’t really want to leave, but it was still his job to go out there and drive the race.

“ Go, I’m gonna be here when you’re finished. ” I told him with a smile, seeing as he stood up with a sigh. “ Good luck, and be careful. ” I added, before the both of us sent a kiss to the other and not gladly, but put down the call.

While they were only showing interviews and some highlights from previous races I went to the kitchen to get a tea ready for myself. I knew the little amount of caffeine it offered would be needed, as I already felt a bit tired and we weren’t even at the start of the race. I patiently waited for the kettle to finally go off so I could pour the boiling water over the tea bag in my favourite mug. I was the first one to sit down on the couch with my legs pulled up, before Hendrik took a seat in the armchair to my right, paying a bit more attention to the reporters than I did. I was mostly watching because of Nyck, while his dad was more into the sport itself and was watching it even before there was someone we knew driving in it.

I felt a bit more energetic when the cars were finally on the track and soon took their positions on the grid. A smile got on my face as they showed Nyck’s car, still trying to hide it with the mug as I usually did. Sometimes it felt like I was too head over heels for him, but I couldn’t help myself. I couldn’t help either as I started turning the thin engagement ring on my finger, as it was a reflex for me at the start of the races. It was a kind of lucky charm for me to do so, in a way being there for him even if I was on the other side of the world sometimes. It usually worked and as they took off with Nyck up to second in just a few turns I could say it was successful once again. With a relieved sigh I went back to drinking my tea and slowly layed down when my back started hurting a bit.

We were almost half an hour into the race when I started to become a bit tired. Nyck’s start was perfect, starting at the top and getting a position almost immediately, but then was a bit unlucky and fell back a few. He was still doing good and had time to get back at them and fight himself up the order. I was just sitting up to look at Hendrik, who was in the kitchen behind the couch I was lying on, when we heard the commentators raise their voices. Turning my head back towards the TV screen I could see the white smoke around Nyck’s black Mercedes as he was trying to stop while going straight towards the wall. My fingers clutched at the blanket in my lap as on the way he hit Frijns, before he arrived at the wall and hit it quite hard. Luckily it was the softer barriers not just a concrete wall but you could still see how instantly the car came to a stop. My eyes were stuck to the screen as they showed his team and I was still holding my breath as his radio animation came up.

“ He’s probably okay. Wasn’t the worst crash ever. ” I heard Hendrik as he tried to calm me down, his hands coming onto my shoulders while standing behind the couch. Sadly it didn’t really work as they only showed replays and we could only hear Nyck’s engineer asking about him but there was no answer.

We stayed in the same position, my stomach turning at how they were still not saying anything. When the radio animation came up again and in the next second we could finally hear his voice a sob almost ran out of me. I had my face in my palms, leaning forward a tiny bit as my elbows were propped onto my knees. He still sounded a bit out of breath, his voice hoarser than usual which didn’t ease any bit of my anxiety as in the next second they were already back to showing the leaders. I knew that to them he was only one of the drivers, meaning they didn’t really focus on him while the race was still running. It was only when they showed him getting out of his car, which was already pushed off track, when I could let out the breath that was stuck in my lungs. He was in one piece and well enough to walk back to the pit on his own. That’s a good sign, isn’t it?

My phone was in my hands in an instant after letting it fall to the ground in the shock we experienced. I almost started ringing him, but realised he wouldn’t have his phone with him anyways and gave up on my idea. I was just stuck in my seat, waiting for any footage of him, but they never delivered, only keeping the cameras on the track. For a second I got scared when my device started vibrating and ringing with a well known tune that was linked to Nyck’s contact. Seeing his name on the screen was a surprise, but I accepted the call immediately, lifting the phone to my ears.

“ Are you okay? ” I was the quickest to start talking. “ I mean we saw you walking and that you’re alright, but did you hurt yourself? ” I couldn’t stop myself, hearing as he let out a quiet chuckle at my rambling.

“ Perfectly fine. Hit my side a little and I was confused for a second, but nothing to worry about. ” Nyck assured me, his voice having a calming effect on my anxiety as I could feel it leave my body finally. “ My ego is more bruised than my body. ” He added with a sigh and as he stayed silent I could hear the team behind him who were still working with Stoffel.

“ You can survive that I think. ” I smiled in front of myself, drinking the last remaining sip of tea I still had. “ Early evening then? ” I asked him, in a way not minding that I didn’t have to stay up for longer. Usually it took longer after the race ended to get him into a call, but today’s events meant after we were done here I could go to sleep quite early.

“ Guess so. I’m pretty sure you don’t mind it too much. ” The smile in his voice was almost audible, and I couldn’t deny what he said. Although usually I was easily functioning on 5 or 6 hours, in the last few months I needed at least 8 not to bite off someone’s head during the day.

“ I would rather you be out there than to have an early night. ” I shrugged a little, disappointed a little that this wasn’t a FaceTime call and I couldn’t see him. “ But there’s at least one good thing about today. After knowing you’re not hurt, of course. ” 

“ Maybe I can even catch an earlier flight. Make the good list one bit longer. ” Nyck’s idea made me smile, as him getting home earlier was always great news. “ I’ll just pack up, thank the guys and leave if they don’t need me too much. Everyone will understand. ” He added, the background noises getting quieter as he probably went back to his changing room and closed the door on himself.

“ But only if they really don’t need you. ” I told him while taking a deep breath to calm myself down. Every time he got to travel home earlier than planned was exciting, but in this situation it was everything I could have asked for.

We disconnected the call after a few minutes of talking when it was official that the team would allow him to leave early. I always liked them and knew they were really understanding, supporting Nyck in his every decision since he signed to them. It was the same with his off-track life, as they acknowledged our situation and always made sure their driver could take part in scans and milestone events even after they started the season. Most would say this is the least they can do for their employees, but working in the racing world was usually cruel to your life outside it. You had to find the right place to completely feel supported and not lose control over your own life.

Keeping my unspoken promise, after getting off the couch I did call it a night and went to have a shower. I felt the last bits of stress leave my body as the warm water enveloped me for a few minutes, before I got some pajamas on. Falling into bed never felt better before and I closed my eyes with a content sigh. The house was slowly turning silent as I could hear Nyck’s parents taking turns in the bathroom, with his room right across it. First I thought it was only the few noises coming from the outside that kept me up, but even when the only sound was my own breathing and heartbeat it still wasn’t enough somehow.

Although I never truly fell asleep, at 5 a.m. it felt like I was waking up from the worst sleep of my life. It took a second or two to make me realise what actually woke me up as the pain around my lower abdomen and stomach slowly registered in my mind, and it immediately switched into panic. I got out of bed with a groan, slowly stumbling to the door and down the hallway so I could notify everyone. They were all quick to react, considering it was just dawn and they must have been tired still. While one of them helped me change into some real clothing and get the packed duffle bag from the wardrobe, the other one tried reaching their son, although he was probably on the plane already and didn’t pick up. My only hope was that either the flight will be shorter then announced, or I will somehow get to wait for him.

In the end it wasn’t my decision, but as I wasn’t dialating enough we were still just at the labor part, slowly crawling to the point where we could get on with it. I almost couldn’t believe what my eyes were seeing when Nyck entered the room, still with his backpack with him, and I was sure all the other luggage was either outside the room or in the car as he probably didn’t go home to drop them off. As my anxiety was over the top, the doctor letting us know that we should soon get to the birth as there could be complications otherwise, him getting here in time was the perfect surprise. Turns out it was also perfectly timed as just half an hour later we could finally take the last step, everyone other than me calming down that it won’t get to a cesarean. I truly just wanted to be finished with all of this and the pain. We waited enough for her.

Almost all of my energy and also strength was gone when the midwife finally held our baby in her hands, although there was an eerie silence around the room as she never cried out. I saw her getting up to put her down on a small counter and check over her, although she was completely blocking our view. My heart was stuck in my throat and I could feel tears running down my cheeks as we were waiting for seconds that felt like eternity. Nyck got my attention onto him by squeezing my hand and leaving a kiss on my forehead. I was just about to turn away from the scene and probably break down when we finally heard a little noise and then a baby crying. My head immediately lifted, looking at the midwife who was bringing the little bundle toward us with a relieved smile on her face.

“ She just needed a little bit of coaxing. ” She added with a quiet chuckle while handing her to me. My hands were still shaking a little but as seen as I felt her weight they finally stopped and let me hug her to myself. “ I’ll steal him for a minute, but make it real quick, okay? ” She asked, motioning for Nyck to follow her, probably to get a few informations and signatures from him.

With one last glance at the little girl he left my bedside, letting the grandparents get closer until he got back. It felt like I was in a trance, looking down at her and not really managing to break my eyes away from her now calm face. Time flew by without me noticing anything that was happening around me. I couldn’t wrap my head around the fact that she finally arrived, that we finally had our Ilse with us now. Looking back at the last more than 9 months, it was unbelievable that we didn’t go crazy while waiting for this moment. Not knowing how this will feel, was probably our only saviour. When Nyck finally arrived back, I sent him a sleepy smile and welcomed his kiss, although I didn’t have the energy to do anything other than lay there and smile.

“ Would Dad like to hold her? ” The nurse asked when everything was finally cleaned up and organized, with only family staying in the room. They already had time to check her out while Nyck made sure the paperwork was done, before coming back into the room.

“ Yes! How could I say no to that? ” Nyck asked back with a low chuckle, following instructions and taking a seat in the armchair close to my bed with his shirt off for skin-to-skin contact. I gladly let the nurse take Ilse from me and carefully lay her down on her dad’s chest, before smoothing a soft blanket over them so they won’t catch a cold. “ Welkom in de wereld kleintje. ” He looked down at her and I could see as his arms gently enveloped her tiny body under the blanket.

I did catch a glimpse of his bruised ribs and knew they would be turning an angry purple color in the following days, but I couldn’t really care at the sight of them together. Whatever happened in the last few days was now really the past, being part of a previous chapter, and not the one we were living through now. It felt like such a big turning point, even if we have known for the last 9 and a bit more months that it’s gonna happen. It was a surprise that wasn’t actually a surprise, as we already knew what the gender of the baby is and approximately when she’s going to arrive.

“ This feels unbelievable. ” I stated, even though I knew he was probably thinking the same and I wasn’t sharing anything new with him. “ I really don’t know how we’re gonna wait another 9 months with the next one. ” I shook my head a little and could see as Nyck tried to hold back his laughter.

“ You just went through the birth, something that’s so painful I can’t even imagine how it feels… but you’re already thinking about the next one? ” He asked back, forcing himself to look up at me. His words made me think for a second, realising how surreal it sounded actually.

“ It’s probably just the hormones. Although, we did mention more, and not just one. ” I reminded him, shrugging a little and feeling as my eyes started slowly closing. “ But I need a nap first… probably a month long nap at least. ” I let out a yawn, but forced myself to look at them again, only letting sleep take over me when I saw that Ilse fell asleep too. This way I won’t miss a lot from her first moments.

[jimlingss]

Sugar and Coffee [1]

Chapter 1 - Chapter 2

➜ Words: 3.8k

➜ Genres: 99.5% Fluff, 0.5% Angst, Pâtisserie school!AU

➜ Summary: It isn't hard to be a pâtisserie chef, but it's not a piece of cake either. It seems like for you in particular, life keeps throwing in one wrench after another. It always finds ways to make your sweets bitter. The cherry on top is Jeon Jungkook — a rival with a sensitive sweet tooth who always finds ways to complain about you.

cr.

Baking is an art form. It takes more than just having ingredients and following a recipe. It’s the flavour, texture, taste, and the presentation. It’s knowing why when things go wrong and how to fix it. It’s knowing the right kinds of ingredients to pick, how much of each should be combined, what techniques and methods to use. Baking is therapy. Baking is scientific. It is art.   The ingredients are as follows: 

Fresh strawberries

Sponge cake

Sugar

Heavy cream

Vanilla extract

You slice the freshly washed strawberries into halves as the stand mixer whips the two cups of heavy cream and quarter cup of sugar into medium peaks. Once you’ve got your components prepared, you slice the cooled sponge cake into two layers and set the bottom layer on a cake board on the turning cake table. You spread the whipped cream evenly with an offset spatula and layer the strawberries with cream on top.    Afterwards, you place the other sponge cake on top and repeat the process.   You finish the shortcake with strawberries on top for decorative purposes and pipe flowers with a twelve inch piping bag.   “Very well done! Everyone give a round of applause for Y/N’s shortcake demonstration.”   The teacher claps and the students around the counter follow suit. “Now it’s time for the real test.”   She begins slicing the cake into pieces, but you’re not nervous whatsoever. You know you did a great job and your strawberry shortcake is worthy of salivating over. And as expected, while your classmates take careful bites and allow the flavour to linger on their tongue, there’s nothing but praise.   “Wow, the sponge cake is so soft and moist.”   “The cream is so smooth.”   “It’s so fluffy.”   “It’s melting in my mouth.”   Even the teacher is nodding as she eats. But of course—   “Isn’t it too sweet?”   Jeon Jungkook has his brows deeply furrowed with a soured expression like he bit into a fucking lemon. His fork is cleaned but he puts the utensil down with a noisy clank, not wanting another bite.    A muscle in your cheek twitches.   “Didn’t you say that last time?”   “Yeah.” He shrugs. “But you didn’t follow my advice. Obviously.”   “Maybe you just have sensitive teeth, Jonhson.”   “I don’t,” Jungkook deadpans, not appreciating how you pretend that you don’t know his name.   “I don’t see anyone else complaining.”   “Because they’re too nice to. If you can’t take criticism, then there’s nothing I can do, Y/N.”   There are eyes flickering around. This happens often enough that no one’s particularly surprised, but there’s still bated breath held amongst your classmates.    You open your mouth to retort. But the teacher eats with a thoughtful look, and then nods. “You’re right, Jungkook. You could lessen the sugar just a tad, Y/N. The strawberries are quite sweet this time around. Just goes to show that ingredients might always change, everyone!”   “Okay.” You force a smile. “I’ll make a note of it.”   “Alright class, now that we saw the demonstration, off you go! Watch that whipping cream! It shouldn’t be soft or hard peaks!”   Everyone turns to leave, but your glare connects with Jeon’s until he turns around all the way.    No matter what you make — Jeon Jungkook always complains that it’s too sweet.    He’s a fucking ass.   “What was up with that?” There are audible murmurs behind you. “I thought they were going to fight.”   “In the kitchen? No. Maybe outside — but you know how it is.”   “They still hate each other over the September incident?”   “Well Jeon almost got Y/N expelled….”   You turn around and once they realize they’ve been caught gossiping, they look away with big eyes and they quicken their hands. “So, uh, pass me the cream!”   “Y-Yeah.”   The teacher brings your attention back as she finishes marking the rubric. “Thanks for doing that demonstration for the whole class, Y/N. Job well done as usual. Just lessen the sweetness and you’re good to go.”   You’re given ninety five percent. Full marks lost because of that asshat.    You hope he can feel your glare on his backside.   Eventually class ends and with your station all cleaned, hands washed, and apron put aside, you leave.    Outside of the room, is the most handsome man on the planet waiting for you. The person who you love wholeheartedly. The person you’re most excited to see. Your person.   He’s dressed in a white turtleneck sweater that you got him last year for his birthday, black jeans, and that baby blue trench that’s always soft to the touch. His dark hair is brushed and he’s leaning against the wall casually. But the glimmer in his sheepish eyes betrays the nonchalant exterior he tries to put on.   And the corner of his plump lip pulls into a tender smile.   “Hey—oof!”   Laughter bubbles out of Seokjin’s mouth and his arms wrap around your frame after you quite literally leaped onto him. You barely manage to pull away from the man, having the strongest urge to stick to him forever.   “I missed you.”   You pout and he grins. “Missed you too, sweetheart.”   You lean in to kiss your boyfriend silly. He holds you by your waist and you greet his plump, soft lips that makes you melt in a chaste peck. After a moment, you break away and he wraps an arm around your shoulder. “Should we go?”   “Yeah.” Your steps sync together. “You won’t believe what happened to me today.”   “What happened? Tell me.”   The pair of you walk down the corridor together as the rest of the class continues to spill out. There are girls who caught sight of the heartwarming interaction and they hold their books to their chest as they sigh wistfully.    “God, I’m so jealous. I want to be in love too. When am I going to get a boyfriend?”   “At this rate, never.”   “Hey! Rude!”   “I’m kidding!” She giggles. “You just won’t get someone like Seokjin.”   “Let’s be real, no one is gonna get someone like Seokjin — he’s just...perfect.”   “They’re such a good couple, aren’t they? They’re gonna have such pretty…” Their voices fade, but Jungkook exits and hears their commentary. He turns to steal a glance at your backside down the hall.   Jungkook scoffs audibly.   “What?” Taehyung catches up to his best friend and swings an arm over his shoulder. The same-height brunette follows his line of sight and hums. “Jealous you’re not in a relationship?”   “As if. It’s just pathetic, is all.” Jungkook looks away and they make their own way to the dining hall.   “You really handed it to Y/N today.” Taehyung grins mischievously. “Like damn. I didn’t think her cake was half-bad. But you’re not scared it’s gonna come bite you in the ass, Kook? Y/N’s gonna hammer you down when it’s your turn for demonstration.”   “So what? Like she knows what she’s even doing.”   “Are you sure about that? She seems pretty decent at what she does to me.”   “Decent isn’t good enough,” he says blankly. “She thinks she’s the shit but she came here to follow her boyfriend.”   Taehyung whistles. “You still mad over September?”   “She just irks me. Always has.”   “Right, didn’t you guys go to high school together? You, Jin and her…”   “We never talked. Whatever, it’s not worth talking about and wasting our time. Hey, what’s on the menu for lunch?”   “You tell me. Jimin never texts us what’s new today. Dude just eats and then goes.”   “What class does he even have right now?”   “Bakery safety and sanitation.”   Jungkook grins, remembering just how nightmarish that class was. “Rip.”   The two of them turn the corner, moving the opposite way from you and Seokjin, and the hallway empties out. 

Anxiousness boils at the pit of your stomach. Today’s the day you’ve been waiting for ever since you found out your application was accepted into the institution and you were successfully enrolled. Whatever results appear, it might dictate where you’re headed in the near and far future. The experience that you gain in these two years will pave the path to your career after all.   “It’s today?” Moonbyul puts down her spoon. “Isn’t the paid internship in May? It’s only November.”   “The posting went up for us in November too,” Hani pipes up past a mouthful of eggs. “Remember?”   “Did it? It was so long ago, I forgot.”   “It was only last year.” Sandeul rolls his eyes. “You haven’t gotten that old.”   “I sure feel like it.”   “Well if anything, you sure look like it.”   “Umm, excuse me?”   “Okay, okay, guys,” Your boyfriend interrupts with a laugh. “You’re freaking out Y/N even more.”   They mutter apologies, but you smile. In an attempt to calm yourself down, you ask, “Where did you guys end up going?” After all, they’re a year ahead of you and they’ve been through the entire process. Any advice is helpful advice at this point.   “Sandeul and I got hired by a hotel,” Hani says, “The Marriott. It was a pretty sweet gig, kind of tough though. Out of the entire class, I think five of us went there in total, so we were pretty lucky that we knew each other. It was long hours, but I learned a lot.”   Sandeul scoffs. “Can’t say I did.”   “When do you ever learn?” Moonbyul bites back.   “My internship was at a private club,” Ken recalls, interjecting as the two of them argue again. “But all I baked was bread all day. It was awful.”   “Oh god.” You look to Seokjin. “What if I have to bake bread all day? I hate yeast.”   Jin laughs and he lifts his thumb to affectionately swipe at the corner of your mouth, getting the spaghetti sauce off your skin where you missed. “You’ll be fine. Promise. You’ll probably get hired at a catering company like I did. Or maybe a pastry shop.”   “God, I hope so.”   “Which did you apply to?” Hani asks, playing with her noodles.   “Just a bunch of them. Restaurants, catering companies, shops. I applied to I think ten.”   “Oh, you should be fine then.”   “But I heard sometimes they put you in ones you didn’t apply for.”   “That rarely happens. Don’t worry about it.” She bats the air with her hand, easing your worries a little more.   Your boyfriend smiles warmly. “See? Told you so.”   You nod and check the time. It’s five minutes to noon. And with that realization, you get up. “We should go.”   “Don’t they email you?” Sandeul asks, pulling himself away from his argument with Moonbyul and ignoring whatever half-hearted and playful insult she throws his way.   “Yeah, but the physical posting gets put up faster.” You’re jittery, hopping on both feet and Jin chuckles before he gets up too, taking your food tray and his to dump into the trash.   They wish you all the luck you need and you’re off with Seokjin by your side.   You’re excited and afraid, not exactly sure what to expect. You just hope you get your internship by the same catering company as the one Seokjin had. They liked him enough that they’ve ensured him a position after he graduates. If they hire you too and you do well enough, they’ll hire you back and you’ll get to work with him. It would be absolutely perfect.   You can already imagine it. A small apartment in the city. Working together. Coming home together. There’s not a better plan out there.   The hallway is crowded with lots of people pushing past to look at the posting. There are loud conversations, eager claps and cheers, to disappointed sighs and whines.    “Wait here, okay?” You turn to Jin, not wanting him to be stepped on or pushed by the crowd.    “I’ll be right here.” He squeezes your hand before letting go.    And you push past the horde of students. “Excuse me, excuse me. Sorry…”   “Aw man, I have my internship at a grocery store?! This sucks.” — “The hell is Dog World.” — “Oh my god, oh my god! I got into the East Wood Country Club! Fuck yes!”   Finally, you stumble out of the crowd to the very front. The list is grouped together by locations and you search your name on the paper posting. After an antagonizing minute, you find it. “Kim’s…..Wedding Cake Company….”   Blood drains from your face. It runs cold.   Jeon Jungkook is coming with you.   //   You stomp your foot and cross your arms. You’ve been pouting for the past hour. But you can’t help the distress — not when you were still unable to comprehend it. It was the worst news on Earth. You thought your eyes were wrong, that maybe the posting or printer made a mistake, but the email wasn’t any different either.   “I can’t believe I have to go with that jerk! It’s all ruined!”   “I know, baby.” Seokjin pouts with you, sympathizing with your situation. He pulls you in to plant a kiss at the top of your head. “But you’ll be okay. Promise.”   The way he says it calms your nerves, but that doesn’t mean you still aren’t frustrated to no end.   There was only one paid internship to be done. One that was supposed to pave your way, help with the rest of your career, teach you things that couldn’t be learned through lectures and classroom work. But your one shot is destroyed. In shambles. What should be a fantastic experience is going to be a dreadful one.   Why did things never go right for you?   “I just….I just really wanted to be hired at your company.” You look up at him, eyes stinging and glossy with tears that threaten to shed.    Your plans are ruined.   “It’s okay. You can always apply after graduation.”    “I know.” You sigh. “But of all people, why him?”   A few hours later, the pair of you catch up with your friends at the dining center for dinner, and they quickly notice the way you’re not necessarily jumping for joy, but rather grieving. “Not...good news, I presume?”   Moonbyul gasps. “Did you not get hired anywhere-OW!” She rubs the spot where Sandeul smacked the back of her head for being tactless.   “It’s not that,” you reassure them with a small smile. “My internship is at Kim’s Wedding Cake Company.”   Ken’s eyes are enlarged. “Oh shit.”   “Wedding cakes?!” Hani sharply inhales. “That’s brutal.”   “No, it’s not that either. I don’t mind. It’s just…” You steal a glimpse at your boyfriend. For one, you wanted to go where he went and secondly— “I’m with Jeon Jungkook.”   “Who?” Ken asks, brows furrowing.   “You know, the black haired kid,” Moonbyul says in an attempt to jog his memory.   But the man’s impassive expression doesn’t waver or alter. “You literally described at least a quarter of the population.”   “The one that looks like a rabbit, you idiot.” Hani makes grand gestures. “The deer-looking fellow. You know, the cute one.”   “Right!” He snaps his fingers, as if that was enough to remember him by.   You shake your head. “He’s not cute. He’s an ass. Steer clear territory.”   “Can’t you steer clear from him?” Sandeul asks before he slurps up his carbonara and then chews in his cheek. “There’s like what— four or five kids coming with you? You can probably avoid him if you wanted to.”   “No.” It dawns on you just how bad the circumstances are. “Apparently only two of us are going there. At least I didn’t see anyone else assigned to that place. It’s only going to be just him and I.”   “Yikes.”   “Not helping, Hani.” Seokjin gives her a look that makes her sheepish and mumble an apology. “It’s not going to be that bad.” He reaches for your hand underneath the table, a private place without the prying eyes of his friends. “It’s only for three months and it’s during summer. It won’t happen for quite some time.”   “Yeah.” You squeeze your hand tenderly with his.    It’s wondrous how effective Seokjin’s reassurance is. You feel like there’s no reason for you to be afraid, for you to dread the inevitability. He makes you feel like you could take on anything.   All plans have their obstacles. Maybe this is just yours. Things always have a way of working out after all. You’ll get your experience, do your internship without talking to him, and then apply where Jin will be working after. You just have a feeling — call it your intuition — that it’ll work out.   //   But you’re still somewhat unsettled. You wonder if there’s a way you could switch. At least it wouldn’t hurt to take your chances and ask, then you knew you tried and did all you could. So with a hopeful heart, you approach the office area and open the door. The secretary is gone from her desk, maybe gone to take a bathroom or coffee break, so you take a seat in the waiting area.   One second passes before you overhear a familiar voice that you’ve grown to detest.   “—don’t see how I’m qualified at all! I haven’t even learned about wedding cakes yet!” The frustration is tangible. “It’s a course for next year!”   “Then you’ll get a head start from your classmates, Jungkook.”   There’s an audible sigh and his voice becomes calmer. “Miss. Kang, please. I just don’t understand how I could be put in something I didn’t even apply for.”   “What do you want to do, Jungkook?”   “Pardon?”   “What is it that you want to do after you’ve gotten your diploma?”   “I want to be a chocolatier.” There’s a pause. “A Master Chocolatier. I want to compete in The World Chocolate Masters. That’s why I applied for Oliver’s and Tokyo Confectionery. Spending my time and my internship at a place that does chocolate is important to me. Not wedding cakes.”   “Well, you’re lucky then. I personally know the couple that runs Kim’s Wedding Cake Company. They’re good friends of mine and the man who runs the place with his wife is actually a chocolatier. He studied in Paris and has been in the industry for more than ten years. I feel like you could learn a lot from him, Jungkook. Remember, it’s not the place you go to, but the mentor that you have. Think it over. Give it a few days. If you still have concerns, we can talk about it.”   Jungkook huffs in exasperation and grabs his bag. He mutters a reluctant ‘thank you’ before leaving the office. He doesn’t take one look back but on his way out, he catches you staring straight at him in the waiting area. His steps slow but then he scoffs, looks away and walks out.   When you get a chance to talk to the lady organizing internships, it’s brief — she apologizes and tells you there’ll be no changes made. There’s no arguing, you know that much. Not when Jungkook quite literally tried every desperate plea in the book.   You end up leaving and at the same exact time, Jungkook exits the men’s locker area, changed back into his regular attire. The two of you nearly bump heads, running into each other.   “Are you following me?” he flat out asks when your eyes meet.   You raise a brow, freezing in the middle of the hallway. “Excuse me?”   “Are you following me,” he repeats with a sharp tongue, obviously still peeved over his previous interaction with Miss. Kang. But you don’t know why he’s putting it on you and making such outlandish accusations. There was absolutely no limit to his cockiness.   “Get your head out of your ass, Johnson. I don’t have the time or day to follow you around.”   “Then what are you doing here?”   “I don’t think I need to tell you where I am or what I do.”   “Whatever.” Jungkook rolls his eyes and brushes past you.   But you turn onto your heel and shout after him—   “Do you really think you’ll make it?”   “What?” He shifts around to glare. His thick brows are knitted, mouth downturned.   “Do you really think you’ll make it as a chocolatier?” You meet his eye and a smirk pulls on your features. A rush of air leaves your nose in a snort. “You? Really? You want to compete in The World Chocolate Masters? That’s cute.”   “At least I have actual ambitions and goals and I’m not here for the sake of my boyfriend.”   “Excuse me? What are you trying to say?”   “Don’t play dumb and act like you didn’t follow your little boyfriend here.”   “You don't know anything about me, Jeon.”   “I don’t? I know that you’re not passionate about baking, that’s for sure. Otherwise, you wouldn’t have fucking stolen—”   “Fuck you,” you spit. “I didn’t.”   “Yeah right.” Jungkook scoffs. “Get real, Y/N.”   He gets the last word. Jeon Jungkook turns around, walking away with his bag slung over his shoulder. You shout insults after him but he ignores it, making you look like the fool.   Tears sting your eyes and your teeth grit. He’s an asshole through and through. You don’t know why you even bother wasting your breath.    If Seokjin was the most patient, kindest person and the person that you love the most — then Jeon was the complete opposite. You will forever detest his very being.   //   Your hand is squeezed and you’re brought out of your thoughts.   “Babe? What’s wrong?”   You look to your boyfriend. That’s right — you love him and this man loves you. There’s nothing else that could ever matter more than this. “Nothing. I just had...a really long day today.”   Seokjin stops walking and spreads open his arms wide. He gestures to you. “Come here.”   A smile pulls into your features and you jump into him. Jin laughs, stumbling back as you cuddle into his chest. His arms wrap securely around your frame, shielding you from the cold, from the darkness of the night.   You feel safe.   “I love you.”   He hums and kisses the top of your head. You’re beginning to feel better already.

[carelessannie]

maybe it goes like this: tony courts peter (part 4)

Chapter One | Chapter Two | Chapter Three | Chapter Four | Chapter Five | Chapter Six | Chapter Seven | Chapter Eight | Chapter Nine | Chapter Ten | Epilogue

Read on A03

Read the Stuckony backstory

Starker focus (Tony x Peter), Stuckony (Steve x Bucky x Tony), (Clint x Peter x OFC), also a bit of WinterHawk and SpiderHawk

Starker first date goes about as well as expected with Bucky and Clint as their chaperones...

Major warnings: D/S Au, A/B/O Au, Panic Attacks, Clint Barton is a mess

—

Maybe it goes like this:

“Alright Petey, you wanna quiz me?”

Peter rolls his eyes, and gives Clint a little push, “Are you sure it’s me going on this date, and not you? You’re literally incorrigible.”

“And you love me.”

“And I love you, you whore.”

Clint cackles, “I’ll take it.”

They decided to walk from their apartment to the coffee shop, Peter insisting that the chilly walk in the early November air would bring a natural blush to their complexion and wind-swept quality to their hair. Clint can’t complain— he loves Washington Square and walking around with a pretty Omega on his arm. Sue him.

“— packmates?”

And no one ever gave him an award for a stellar attention span.

“Sorry Pete, what was that?”

“I asked, what are the names of Tony’s packmates?”

Clint pretends to think as Peter gives him a searching look, “Steve and James. But James likes to go by Bucky.”

Peter does a small skip-hop in joy, “Yes! Perfect!” and reaches up on his tiptoes to dot a kiss on Clint’s cheek. Making Peter happy and receiving little kisses has been the biggest incentive to learn trivia about the Omega’s new boyfriend.

“Okay, okay, next one: how old is Tony?”

“Thirty,”

“Yes! And as a bonus, how old are his packmates?” Peter gives him a smug grin, playfully challenging Clint to answer right.

“Steve is twenty-five and Bucky is twenty-four.”

Peter claps his tiny hands together, with a little squeal of joy, and stops Clint in his tracks, pulling him down for a peck right on his lips.

He ducks his head, sheepish from the affection of his gorgeous packmate, and a blush blooms red across his cheeks. Peter doesn’t give him a moment to recover, quickly tugging him along as they finish their trek across the Park.

“Alright, last one, C.” Peter presses the crosswalk button, even though the way is clear, but before he can ask the question Clint squeezes his hand and pulls him across the street. Peter lets out a small protest of no, Clint, we can’t as they run, but the crosswalk is short and the street isn’t busy, so they are almost immediately on the other side.

“Clint—” Peter goes to lecture him, probably about road safety and traffic laws, so Clint interrupts him,

“Last question? Look, we’re almost there,” and they are, so it’s a good distraction for his pouty packmate.

“Oh goodness, you’re right. Okay. Last one then: how long have they been together?”

Knowing that Peter has talked about this a few times, and might expect a few different answers, Clint gives him the long one, “Well. You said they’ve been a pack for two years,”

“Right,”

“That Tony met Steve four years ago, and Bucky the year after, but Steve and Bucky were already together,”

“Right again,”

“And Steve and Bucky have known each other since they were kids, but didn’t get together until college.”

“Right, right, right! Gosh, I’m so proud of you, C.” The younger boy looks so happy, and Clint can’t help pulling Peter’s hand up to place a light kiss across his knuckles, waiting for the last crosswalk light to turn.

“I’m proud of you, Pete, and you’re gonna have a great time with him today. You just pretend like we’re invisible, and I’ll just casually pry for personal information and signal to you if we need to run, okay?”

Peter giggles and his smile brightens as he pulls Clint across the street to the coffee shop, “Somehow I feel like we’re gonna be fine.”

---

It was sheer stupidity to worry about Clint getting along with Bucky.

The moment they enter the coffee shop, Clint can hear a loud voice calling, “Peter,” and looks to his side to gauge Peter’s reaction, realizing the tiny Omega is already halfway across the cafe.

Clint trails along slowly, amused by the handsome, older man cooing over his small, beautiful date. Peter is dwarfed in the larger man’s arms, and Clint has never seen him look this content. And it’s been like twenty seconds.

“Tony! This is my packmate, Clint,” he reaches forward to shake Tony’s hand, exchanging good to meet you’s, as the older man grips tighter and quirks his lips up in a secret smile. The expression elevates his charm even further, and Clint lets his hand be dropped in awe.

“Oh, and this is Bucky,” Tony steps a little to the right to reveal another dark, stunning man, who flashes him a heartbreaking smile. Damn, where does Peter find these guys?

He doesn’t even hesitate, grabbing Bucky’s hand and pulling him a little closer, as Bucky’s smile turns from amused to knowing. Bucky leans closer, and whispers so only he can hear,

“I have a thing for blondes.”

Fuck.

Clint turns to Peter, “Let’s marry them. Please.”

Peter just giggles, turning killer doe-eyes on Tony, and it looks like Tony wants to mate the Omega right then and there. Clint is a horrible chaperone, but glad they all seem to be on the same page.

Bucky claps his hands, pulling all three of them out of their mild trance, and suggests grabbing tables and ordering coffee. He gives a pointed stare to Tony, and then turns it on Clint.

Oh. That’s a hint to get lost.

Tony pats Clint on the shoulder, nodding his head towards the counter as they leave the other two men to acquire tables.

“So Tony,”

“So, Clint. What— uh. What does Pete usually drink?”

They get in line, and Clint gives the menu a critical eye.

“Doesn’t he drink coffee in the lab?”

Tony looks a little uncomfortable, but answers easily, “Sure, but he usually drinks the drip coffee black. I want to get him something special, so I figured you would know what he treats himself to.”

“Alright, make a guess.”

“Huh?” Clint smiles a bit at Tony’s confusion,

“I know what he likes, but I want to see what you would get him, what you think he likes.”

Now it’s Tony’s turn to eye the menu, humming in thought—

“Something sweet, but with a little twist. Maybe salted caramel? Uh. I’m gonna go with salted caramel latte, with extra whipped cream.”

It’s a good guess, and honestly Peter probably would like it, but Clint wants to watch this man be proved wrong.

“Maybe,” immediately Tony’s smile deflates a bit, “but a few months ago he discovered the London Fog, and it’s his guilty pleasure drink. You were right he likes a twist, and the earl grey adds like... a spice, or something, to the sweet vanilla latte— but he actually doesn’t like coffee all that much. He actually prefers tea, but coffee has more caffeine.”

Tony nods, seeming intrigued and distracted, before focusing back on Clint,

“But you like it black, don’t you?” tilting his head, it feels like Tony is answering a question he studied hard for.

And he’s not wrong, “Yeah, I prefer it black, Tony.”

“Okay, good.�� and that’s the end of the conversation. Tony steps up to order as Clint waits behind him— just a little irritated when Tony orders for all of them.

In addition to the London Fog and large black coffee, Tony places an order for a small cappuccino and a large dark chocolate iced coffee with extra whipped cream and a doppio shot of espresso. As they carry the orders back to the table, along with a half dozen pastries, Clint is torn between his excitement to see Peter’s reaction and his anticipation to see which drink Tony ended up with— and which one is hot-Bucky’s.

“Here, honey,” Tony hands over the London Fog to a grabby Peter, who inhales deeply and lights up in surprise.

“H— how did you know, Tony? Oh my god, this is my favorite, thank you—”

Clint and Bucky exchange an eye roll at the sappy couple, and Tony swoons, “Honestly, Clint tipped me off. I had no idea that you prefer tea, baby.”

They take this as their cue, and Clint grabs his mug, waiting to see which drink Bucky will take before making their way over to a nearby table.

Naturally, Bucky grabs the iced coffee, smiling softly, and places his hand on Tony’s shoulder, giving him a short kiss on the lips. Both Peter and Clint stare in shock as Tony deepens the kiss, pulling Bucky closer and… yep, that’s his tongue. They pull away, both looking smug, and Tony turns back to Peter as if the world didn’t just stop spinning.

Bucky leads the way back to their table, and Clint has to adjust himself in his pants, thankful for the comfy seat and a table in between them as they sit down.

“Okay, first of all, that was hot.”

He gets a wink in response as Bucky sucks his straw into his mouth, slurping obscenely instead of responding, and Clint quickly takes a swig of his coffee as a distraction, sputtering as it burns his tongue.

“Aw, coffee, no.” and Bucky is laughing now, reaching over to grab his arm as his posture relaxes.

And there’s something else— underneath the coffee shop smell, the scent of Oranges and Milk Chocolate and HappyContentRelaxedOmega.

Oh. Alright then.

Clint’s experience with Omegas is limited to his two packmates, so he lets himself enjoy the calming scent coming from the beautiful man across from him until—

“Hey man, you good?” concerned steel-blue eyes gaze across the table at him, and he feels completely out of his depth.

“Yeah, just burned my tongue,” he takes another sip, mindlessly, and immediately regrets it, “Ow— shit.”

The mug is pulled out of his hands, “Wow, you’re a human wreck, aren’t you?” but Bucky’s expression is indulgent and teasing instead of cruel, so Clint smiles along, grateful.

“All day, every day, gorgeous.”

And after that, conversation flows naturally, both men laid back and enjoying a day to people-watch and drink expensive coffee. Occasionally they turn their attention back to Tony and Peter, the couple sitting close together and feeding each other small bites of pastry.

Bucky and Clint both shudder simultaneously. Gross.

So they mostly ignore their packmates, instead bonding about sports. Like idiots. Clint learns about Bucky’s past in baseball and football, and he shares about his time in the Olympics, to which Bucky—

“You’re shitting me, right? You’re the amazing Hawkeye? I literally followed your career when you were in Rio, and oh my god, you were in Rio,” Bucky looks around frantically, as if he’s trying to find a witness to this story, and Clint just grins.

“Clint fucking Barton—”

“— and that is officially my middle name—”

“— shut up, and you medaled, right?”

Aw, such a cute Omega. “Gold and Silver, hot stuff.”

It’s not often that Clint can make an Omega swoon, and technically there has only been one official occurrence of said event, but he basks in the praise that Bucky gives him for this, thanking the all-powerful archery gods for his performance two years ago.

“Clint, that’s literally so cool. I mean— Tony does cool stuff all day long in the lab, and— and I can flex about my degree and high school sports stats, or my Alpha’s career in the Army, but—”

“Wait,” Clint interrupts, suddenly going still at Bucky’s words, “you had an Alpha?”

Bucky looks confused, “No, I have an Alpha. Tony and I do— didn’t Peter mention Steve?”

He feels the walls closing in around him. Of course he’s heard about Steve, but had no idea—

Drawing his imaginary bow, he catches Peter’s eyes and releases the arrow. Peter signs back a discreet I love you in ASL.

Clint heads for their table, knowing Peter has received his distress signal.

---

Bucky’s not quite sure what just happened.

He sits at the table, watching silently as Clint walks over to Peter, pulls him to the side, and the two packmates have brief, intense conversation.

Tony looks his way, curiously, and all he can do is shrug his shoulders.

He retraces their conversation quickly— was it the Olympics? No, Clint was perfectly happy to preen about that. Was it about his time in the military? Some people are hesitant to ask about that, but Clint had seemed fine. That is until he mentioned—

“We’re leaving, I’m so sorry, Tony,”

Peter is now tucked protectively underneath Clint’s arm, the Beta avoiding all eye contact, as his packmate apologizes for the inconvenience.

“— we have personal stuff that just came up, pack stuff, and need to cut this short.”

Tony gently strokes the Omega’s concerned face, smoothing out the lines of worry.

“Honey, do whatever you need to, okay? And please call me if you need anything. I swear, Pete.”

Peter nods seriously, “Of course, Tony. And we’ll have our second date soon, right?” a hopeful expression coming over his pretty features as Clint noticeably pulls him closer.

“... of course, Peter. I would love nothing more.”

With a quick kiss to the back of Peter’s hand, Tony lets him go— Clint sweeping the smaller boy out of the coffee shop and back down the street.

Bucky still hasn’t moved, and Tony is frozen with his hand still raised, watching the two men hurry away.

“... What did you say.”

Tony turns slowly, face carefully blank, as he takes a step in Bucky’s direction.

Bucky shakes his head, “I— I don’t know—”

“Don’t lie to me, James. What did you say to Clint?”

His vision is starting to get fuzzy, and all Bucky wants to do is sit, but he’s trapped under the weight of his Beta’s gaze and Dominant voice.

“J— jus’ said. St— Stevie,” he chokes on his next breath, “Stevie’s our… A—alpha.”

He still senses anger from his Beta, and instinctively hunches in his shoulders, making himself smaller, as exposes his neck in submission.

“Shit,” Tony curses, and Bucky whimpers, unsure why his Beta is so displeased with him.

“Someone bring us coffee, please? My mate is dropping—“

Oh, coffee. Coffee is good.

He sips on the warm drink that’s placed in his hands moments later, but then remembers Clint’s FearProtectEscape scent, and the mug almost shakes out of his hands, hitting the table in front of him.

Tony takes it gently, pulling his seat closer, and Bucky is so scared at how easily he’s swung submissive. It’s been years since the last time he made a scene in public, and he can’t get a grip on himself. But it doesn’t matter as everything slips away.

There are suddenly fingers on his chin, lifting his gaze back to Tony, and his Beta stares into his eyes for a moment before cursing again and pulling out his phone, letting Bucky’s head drop.

Down.

At the low urgency of his Beta’s voice, he sinks down, down, down, further into his head.

He sinks down, knees hitting the hardwood flooring and face planting firmly into Tony’s thigh. He breathes in deep, and is pleased to feel calloused fingers petting his hair. The rhythm pulls him down, and all he can think about is the steady thrum of his Beta’s pulse and the solid grounding of the wood under his knees. He mouths absently at the fabric in front of him.

And then he’s flying. Up.

But wait. He can’t fly.

Oh— a summer thunderstorm. Maybe he is flying, then. Up, up, up, he’s lifted by strong arms, and a familiar low voice. His vision swims in front of him, brief images flashing and drifting past his subconscious, and he’s content to be wrapped tight in the scent of home.

“A— alpha, please,” he whispers, and feels a low rumble start on his right side, warm and content.

He floats.

Time passes.

But then he’s cold again.

Confused, he feels around for the comforting warmth from before, but can’t find it. He opens his eyes and it’s dark. He tries to move, to climb out of this dark place, but his arms are trapped, pinned by his sides.

His breathing picks up.

“No, no no nooo—” he’s so alone. He tries to think back to what happened, to what he did to be punished this way, and remembers his Beta’s displeasure, the disappointment. He can’t remember, doesn’t understand—

“Bucky?”

“No, please, ‘m sorry sir, please, no—”

“Dammit Tony, I knew we shouldn’t have left him—”

He cries harder as he’s shifted around, hoping his punishment will be quick.

Instead, his arms are freed, and a merciful, bright light, brings him up, closer to the surface. Warm again, Bucky sobs in the safety of strong arms, whispering sorries into his Alpha’s neck as he’s cradled close.

At some point he must pass out, because he wakes up slowly to the familiar scent of their den at home. He hears low murmurs of his packmates talking nearby, and tries to blink open his eyes. He takes in the feeling of being held, wrapped with both sets of arms around his waist, and hums in appreciation. The voices go silent as one arm lifts to brush his hair off his face,

“Buck, are you coming back up?”

He takes inventory before responding, checking his senses and pushing through the cloudiness in his head to give his Alpha a nod yes.

“Good boy, so proud of you,” the sweet voice croons back to him, and he feels himself smile at the praise. “Tony, grab the tray we set out, two water bottles and the juice.”

He’s moved, sitting now, and blinks open his eyes to watch his Beta place the tray in front of them on the bed and hand a bottle of water their Alpha. The pieces of food on the tray are his favorites, he knows, but doesn’t waste energy figuring it out. His Alpha and Beta will take care of that for him.

“Tony, do you want to hold him or feed him?”

There’s a small pause, and a sigh, before his Alpha is speaking again, “Fine, you’ll hold him.”

He’s picked up, his Alpha scenting him briefly, before setting Bucky in between firm legs, propping him up against a rigid chest.

Bucky tries to curl up again, already feeling the hesitation and rejection coming from his Beta, but a low growl from their Alpha has both packmates stilling, before relaxing together.

“I swear to god Tony, do not put your insecurities on him. Comfort our Omega, or I swear to god I will lock you out of our den for a week, understood?”

Bucky doesn’t have to turn to look to know Tony’s face is scrunching up, even as he answers, “Yes, Alpha,” and Bucky can’t help but laugh a bit, closing his eyes and wiggling back into Tony’s arms as they close around him.

He peeks to look at Steve, and sees the tail end of a fond smile aimed towards both his packmates.

The water bottle is opened with an audible snap and gently pressed up against his lips as Steve murmurs drink, baby and he obeys, the cool liquid bringing him up even further and satisfying his thirst.

After a few moments, the bottle is empty and Steve is praising him again as he replaces the water with a few pieces of cheese and sweet chocolate. Bucky watches as Steve gathers each piece intentionally, before feeding them to Bucky— each time praising him for the simple task of chewing and swallowing.

With the fourth bite, Bucky sucks one of Steve’s fingers into his mouth, giving it a light nip before Steve pulls it free, be good falling from his lips, even as his eyes darken and stay glued to Bucky’s mouth.

“Feeling better, love?” Tony whispers into his shoulder, dropping a small kiss onto the skin right above his Alpha’s sweatshirt— the one they like to wrap him in when he floats after a scene. Bucky tries to twist and see Tony’s face, but the Beta keeps him facing forward as he confesses, “I feel horrible that I dropped you in public like that. You were there, helping me out, and I really hurt you. I’m so sorry, baby—”

Now Bucky really breaks the hold, turning in his Beta’s lap to see his face— pulling Tony’s hands out of the way,

“Tony, it's okay now. I’m safe, and you did the best that you could. ’m not mad at you.”

If anything, Tony’s face looks even more upset and devastated, “But I didn’t, though. I yelled and left you alone in the car and was way too focused on the Omega that I’m trying to court, and completely forgot that it’s you I’m committed to, and you I’m responsible for—”

“— okay, first of all, you are not responsible for me,” Bucky cuts in, “Yeah, we’re mates and look after each other, but even Stevie here isn’t responsible for me. I’m in charge of that, got it? We scene together and look after each other, but just because you’re my Dom doesn’t give you control of my life,” Steve rubs his back in encouragement, and this gives him the strength to finish, “Second, sweetheart, I had the best time meeting Peter and Clint. It’s my fault Clint freaked out, and I don’t know… something about that caused me to swing really fast.”

Steve speaks before Tony can, “Wait, what happened with Clint?”

“Oh, I guess I didn’t mention,” Tony answers, pulling Bucky to his side and throwing an arm over his shoulder, “something freaked Clint out and he left early with Peter.”

“But what—”

“Steve,” Bucky grabs his mate’s hand, “I think it had something to do with you being pack Alpha.”

Even Tony tenses up at Bucky’s words, and before Steve can say anything else, he tries to explain, “I don’t know what happened. One minute we were talking about the Olympics— which, Stevie, he’s like a crazy talented archer, you wouldn’t even believe it— but I mention our pack Alpha and he flips. He makes some sort of signal to Peter, and the two of them practically ran outta there.”

“Oh man,” Steve says as Tony curses under his breath, “what do you think— Tony, did you know about this at all?”

“I swear, I had no idea. Pete said his whole Ado-pack was excited to meet you guys, so I assumed…”

The Alpha shakes his head, “No, I get it. He must have some sort of trauma— maybe a previous pack with an abusive pack Alpha.”

Bucky reaches forward, pulling their Alpha’s hand in a silent invitation. They readjust, letting Steve lay in the middle, and curl up on either side of him. He traces a finger around Steve’s abs, teasing a little lower until he hears a throat clear, and Tony laces their fingers together instead. Bucky shakes with laughter, and kisses Steve’s side, “Baby, there’s nothing you can do. It wasn’t you.”

“Love you, Steve,” Tony adds, "I’ll talk to Petey, see what the damage is. You guys come first— Peter knows that.” he sounds resigned, so Bucky squeezes his hand, sending over an empathetic smile.

Steve strokes both of their heads, protective and affectionate, “I love you guys,” leaning down, Steve brushes a kiss over Tony’s forehead, “Don’t worry, my Beta, I have a feeling you won’t have to choose.”

Tony’s mouth ticks upward in a grin as he lets his eyes close, “I hope so, Alpha.”

---

A few hours earlier

Clint measures his steps, walking fast without drawing unnecessary attention, as he approaches Peter and Tony’s table. He grabs Peter’s arm, and the younger man is already standing, looking up at him with concern and fear in his eyes.

“We need to leave, now.”

“What happened? Did Bucky—”

“No, Bucky’s fine, it’s me. I have to get out of here.”

“Do I need to call Annie? Are you gonna drop?”

“Maybe. I don’t know,” it’s now taking physical effort to breathe normally, “please, Pete.”

Peter nods once, studying Clint’s face for a moment before tucking himself under Clint’s arm, and he focuses on the glass window, pretending he’s outside and far away from this place. He hears Peter’s voice, and Tony’s voice, but all of it muddles together as he concentrates on keeping his head clear.

“... nothing more,” Tony’s saying, giving a brief kiss to Peter’s delicate hand, and Clint pulls the Omega closer, mind focusing on the singularity of getting them home, keeping his pack safe.

He steers Peter through the door, walking them in a haze back across the busy streets, park sidewalks, and a few blocks further to their apartment. His Omega is obediently silent, beautifully pliant, and Clint instinctively rewards him, stroking through his hair and kissing his fingers as they work their way through the building and up the stairs to their apartment.

They stop in front of the door and Clint grunts open it, sweet Omega and keys jingle in the lock, his Omega perfectly opening the door and letting them through. He wraps his Omega in both arms, scenting deeply, and enjoying HappyContentRelaxedOmega.  

But he’s on a mission.

He grabs his Omega, “Nest.” and waits for the verbal confirmation, “Yes, Beta.” before continuing, trusting his Omega to follow his order.

He scents the apartment, walking through the rooms at a steady prowl until he catches sweet Strawberries and Salted Caramel coming from the kitchen.

He sees his Omega in the kitchen, gathering food and water for their nest. She sees him standing at the entrance, but doesn’t submit. He growls at her in warning, but she just returns his gaze.

“Omega.” he gives one more warning, and she finally drops her eyes. Good.

He stalks closer, moving her hair to the side, and scenting her thoroughly, offering his own wrist for her to use. A few kisses to her neck, and he enjoys the scent of HappyContentRelaxedOmega for the third time tonight, silently urging her to gather the materials for their nest and follow him to find their Omega.

He makes his way toward the bedroom. His Omega has built a beautiful nest, warm and inviting, with perfect lighting and ample protection from outside threats. Both Omegas finish setting up the fortress, and start to strip.

He growls slightly, and they stop obediently, submitting to his wishes. He steps forward, slowly pulls both of them out of shirts, shoes, and pants, leaving intimate parts covered and perfect skin unveiled.

“Me.” he commands, and both Omegas move quickly, stripping his shirt and pants until all of them stand in a similar state of dress.

He steps forward to inspect the nest, already having approved of it thus far, and crawls towards the center, checking the scent distribution.

“More. Annie.” and a shirt is tossed his way. He scents the item and places it in their nest, continuing his path to the center.

“Come.”  

One at a time, his pack joins him in their nest, and he settles them next to each other, covering their vulnerable areas with soft blankets, and cushioning their heads with pillows.

He joins them, sliding in between so that they are curled into his side, protected under his arms. Safe. Warm. Home.

“Sleep.” he growls, letting himself drift now that his pack is safe.

---

A few hours later, he starts to climb back into consciousness.

He can hear his pack talking near him, but it’s mostly nonsense. His mind feels heavy and blank, and all he can think about is keeping them safe. Keeping himself safe.

He opens his eyes, sitting up suddenly, and his packmates turn to look at him.

He goes to command them, needing control over the situation, but his Omega sits up taller, refusing to bare her throat to him.

“Apple,” she stares into his eyes, gripping his jaw, firm, and coaxing his mouth open. She slides the fruit between his lips and he knows— it’s familiar—

“Chew, Clint. C’mon.” and he obeys, taking a crisp bite. As he chews, he enjoys the sweet and tangy flavors, grounding him. He swallows.

“Banana,” oh, he knows now, and opens his lips to let Annie feed him a small bite of banana, letting the sweet and soft tastes contrast clearly in his mouth, and he hums appreciatively.

“Last one, Clint. You’re doing great, and I need you to answer. What is this?” Annie holds the last piece up to his lips, and Clint gives her a sweet smile,

“Carrot,” and Annie slips it into his mouth, letting him crunch down on it. So different from the fruits, Clint feels the hard veggie pull him back to the present, and he blinks in awareness.

Oh, shit.

Clint feels tears sting his eyes, as he looks for Peter,

“Pete, I’m... oh my god, I'm s-so sorry, I don’t even know what happened—”

The small Omega crawls towards him on the nest, making sure not to show his neck and continues to maintain eye contact, cupping his cheek tenderly,

“Hush. We’ll talk about it in a minute— but... Clint, you dropped in the coffee shop, I think, and you swung dominant.”

He knew it was something bad, and Clint starts to pull away, terrified of hurting his pack further—

Thump!

“Ow!” Clint grabs at the stinging on his temple, right where Annie just flicked him,

“You absolute idiot,” she chastises, turning his face to look her way, “Clint do you even know how wonderful of a Dom you were this afternoon? Even in your drop you protected us so well, so of course we kept you safe.”

He stays silent, dropping his eyes, and Peter presses up against his side in solid comfort.

Annie continues, “I know swinging dominant is hard for you, I get it. But you’re not like him, okay? You kept us safe, and we kept you safe. Give yourself a break.”

It’s hard to believe, but he nods anyway, murmuring a quiet thanks to his packmates.

They are content to sit in silence for a few moments, filling their nest with Happy and Home.  

Annie breaks the silence again,

“So— who’s gonna tell me what happened?”

Clint defers to Peter, hoping to get their smaller packmate to gush about his date, but Peter doesn’t take the hint,

“I’m drinking tea with Tony, talking about improving efficiency of hydroelectricity in international power exchange, and suddenly Clint is giving me the panic sign and we’re running out of there,” he takes a sip of his tea, “okay, it’s your turn, C.”

Damn the pretty minx.

“I— okay, it’s not all clear to me. One minute, I’m hitting it off with this gorgeous Omega— yeah, Pete, you were right— and then he mentions his pack Alpha and I just lost it,” he turns to Peter, feeling hurt again, “why didn’t you tell me they had a pack Alpha?”

“C—clint I honestly… I had no idea. Tony never even mentioned that Bucky was an Omega, I guess I thought— I’m honestly so sorry, I assumed they were both Omegas, like our pack. Tony’s just so dominant—”

“No, it’s not— it’s not your fault, Petey.”

“How dominant?” throwing a sly smile, Annie redirects the conversation innocently, and Peter lets out a scandalous gasp.

“Annie!”

She laughs, grabbing at him to tickle his sides which makes him squeal,

“I wanna hear all about our future pack, guys, so tell me: how dominant is this guy? You said he’s a Beta, right?”

Clint and Peter exchange a hesitant look, and Peter speaks up, “Future pack?”

Annie looks between them and rolls her eyes,

“Well, you had a compatible memory with Tony, right? And Bucky sounds like a whole snack. We’ll work up to meeting Steve, but for now, it’s a definite possibility.”

Clint wants to protest this, upset at how his best friend is so easily dismissing his past trauma, but takes a moment to think. He did really like Bucky, and Tony is incredibly handsome and charming. Oh, and he looked like Peter’s second half— even on their first date.

While he’s silent, thinking over the options, Peter has been sharing details about his admirer with Annie, who is looking more and more intrigued by the second.

“— so he brought you your all time favorite drink—”

“— by Clint’s suggestion—”

Annie waves it off, “and then what?”

Ah, Clint almost forgot about that kiss.

He moans, dramatically and indecently, but it gets Annie’s attention,

“Watching Tony and Bucky kiss almost had me fucking coming in my pants, Annie—” she snorts a laugh, and Peter shakes his head, interrupting—

“No, Annie, it was so hot. You know how you like it when I make out with Clint?” she nods, mouth hanging wide open, “like that— but it was Tony.”

At that, Clint rolls his eyes, “It was Toneeyyy,” he mocks, getting both Omegas to laugh as Peter throws a pillow at him.

“Shut up, Clint,” Annie smacks him in the arm lightly, “leave the horny Omega alone.”

Peter gasps again, “Betrayal!”

Both of them cackle and pull Peter close, ignoring his pouty face and snuggling him close. Clint relaxes around his pack, thankful again to have them so close to him tonight, and is surprised when Annie, and then Peter, start purring.

Clint hums, “You two are my favorites.” and his packmates both press closer.

He’s unsure about the future. Unsure about things changing so fast. But as long as these two stick next to him, he can face his fears, knowing he’s not alone.

“Good,” Peter whispers, “because I want Tony to visit soon, and formally meet our pack.”

[toomanystoriessolittletime]

Never mine

Summary: When you got a phone call in the middle of the night, asking you to assist in a interogation of a high level target you didn’t really think about it. Until you were there and saw just who you were there for.

Pairing: August Walker x unnamed OFC

Wordcount: 2.063

Warnings: a whole lotta angst

A/N: So this happens when I’m listening to too much Taylor Swift. Inspired by thy lyrics to “August” The lyrics I use are not mine but hers.

Taglist in reblog

Your phone rang in the middle of the night. That wasn’t something that happened very often. The CIA never really needed your help. So if they were calling now, something big must have happened.

Sighing you let yourself fall back into the soft covers of your bed. A car would be there to pick you up in 20 minutes to bring you to the airport, where a private jet would be flying you out to the CIA base. 

Apparently they had taken in a target they had been searching for in forever.

“Just make yourself comfortable and watch him. Tell me what you think. I don’t think he will talk, but maybe you can give us something.” Sloane said as she walked you into the room. You nodded at the two agents standing in front of the window, the interrogation room brightly lit behind it. 

“What did he do?” You asked, as you sat down.

“He tried to buy plutonium to do god knows what.”

“Wow…”

“He’s one of our own.”

“He’s a CIA Agent?” You asked surprised.

“He was one of the best we had.” Sloane signed, before she nodded and walked out of the room. Frowning you took out your tablet to log into the wifi, so you could make some notes and wait for the file to be send to you.

“So you’re the expert Sloane hasn’t shut up about all day?” A man asked. He was your age, short dark hair and green eyes, which seemed to undress you as he looked at you.

“I am.”

“And what is your expertise?” He asked with a grin. Internally sighing, you set your tablet down and now gave him his full attention.

“Agent…”

“Cross.” He answered.

“Agent Cross, I’m gonna save you some time here. I’m sure your wife wouldn’t be pleased to see that you have taken off your wedding ring.” You smiled a little. He frowned and pushed his hand into his pants pocket.

“I’m here to work, and work only. And as someone who dealt with men like you all her life, I would very much appreciate if you would let me do my work in peace.” You smiled at him. He slowly nodded, until he turned around and left the room. You saw the man across from you grinning to himself, giving you a thumbs up.

“They are bringing the suspect in in a couple minutes. Sloane told me to give you the room, so you can focus on doing your thing.” The man got up from his seat.

“Thank you Agent…”

“Bridges.”

“Thank you Agent Bridges.” You smiled and waited until he closed the door after him. It’s been a while since you’ve been brought in to help. Closing your eyes as you saw the door in the interrogation room open you calmed yourself. Breathing in deep you opened your eyes just to see the back of a tall man that was facing you. He had to be at least two heads taller than you. You could see that he was wearing dirty green clothes.

“Someone already in there?” He asked, motioning towards you behind the glass as he was sat down at the table. After he had been handcuffed to the chair the Agent in the room left.

Noticing the file being send to you, you opened it. That must have been who you were looking at.

Reading the name you frowned.

August Walker, born November 17th 1984.

Shaking your head you looked up as the man in the room turned his head towards you. You knew he couldn’t see you, yet he was looking directly at you. Swallowing you felt your chest tighten as you looked into his blue eyes.

He was older. Much older. Yet you felt yourself being transported back into the year 2004. When you were working at a coffee shop in Miami to earn some money for college. To the day you met August for the first time. To the day you fell head over heels for him. Knowing fully well that you would never have a future together. To the day he left you.

…. But I can see us lost in the memory

August slipped away into a moment in time….

Miami, Summer of 2004

It’s been another day of customers being rude to you, just because you were doing your job. Groaning you cleaned the coffee machine when the door of the shop opened. 

“We’re closed. Sorry.” You said, without turning around.

“Oh… Sorry.” A deep voice behind you said. Sighing you turned around. A boy, maybe a couple years older than you was standing at the counter. He was wearing dark swim shorts and a white shirt. His curly hair still wet. He had to come directly from the beach.

You felt yourself blush as you looked at him. He was incredibly handsome.

“Uhm… Maybe, if you don’t want a coffee, I could make an exception?” You grinned. He smiled back, his hand brushing a stray of his dark hair back.

“I just wanted a bottle of water.” He said, stepping closer. 

“Oh… Sure.” You turned around, opening the fridge to get a bottle of water out.

“That will be a dollar.” You said as you gave the bottle to him. His fingers brushed over yours as he took it.

He pulled a dollar out, sliding it over the counter.

“Okay. Can I be honest?” He asked before he was about to turn around.

“Sure.” You shrugged.

“I didn’t really need to buy water.” He said. “I’ve been in here before twice today but I never caught you alone. And I was wondering… Can I invite you for dinner?” He asked. 

Biting your lip, to stop you from grinning like an idiot you looked at him. His deep blue eyes watching you, and you noticed that there was a fleck of brown in one of them.

“Meet me at 7pm in front of the cafe tomorrow?” You finally said. He released a breath, smiling at you.

“I’ll be there.” He said.

He invited you to the beach on the day after your date. You so badly wished he would just kiss you. Looking at him as you were laying next to him, him on his chest, you wish you could be this happy for the rest of your life. He turned his head and looked up at you, a smile on his lips. 

Your back beneath the sun

Wishin' I could write my name on it

He kissed you goodbye when he brought you home that day. Your first kiss. You still remember how his lips felt on yours.

… And I can see us twisted in bedsheets

August sipped away like a bottle of wine…

That’s how you met August. The first love of your life. It may only have been only one summer, but yet you always found yourself thinking back to it. You had so many first with him. 

Looking at him now, you could still see the boy you fell in love with so long ago. Sure he was older, he somehow seemed bigger, yet his eyes... You still felt yourself get lost in them. Like in the morning after you woke up pressed against his chest, twisted together under your bed sheets, as he kept rubbing his finger down your nose to wake you.

'Cause you were never mine

The door opened again and two agents walked in, sitting down across from him. That gave you the chance to look down at his file. 

“What happened to you after you left me?” You asked quietly as you read. shaking your head you looked up as one of the Agents began to ask questions. Yet August eyes were set on you. As if he could see you.

'Cause you were never mine

Never mine

But do you remember?

Shaking your head you released a sigh. Pushing your thoughts to the side. You never thought you would see him again. You never wanted to see him again. Not after how he left you. 

Three hours later Sloane walked in.

“Anything you can give me?” She asked.

“Not really. He knows what he’s doing.” You sighed.

“You ready to get in there?” Sloane asked. 

“I need to tell you something first.”

Your palms were sweaty as you walked by Sloane’s side. You had told her everything. And now she was sure you were the only one who he would talk to. You wished you’d share her enthusiasm.

“You gonna be okay?” Sloane asked.

“No. But It*s not like you care.” You said quietly before you let her open the door for you.

He didn’t look up when you walked in. You had done hundreds of situations like this. But at the same time not one has been like this. You closed your eyes as you walked over to sit down in the seat across from him. He was still handcuffed to the table. You crossed your legs, your hands on top of the table and waited. Braced yourself to have his full attention.

You saw him shift, his head slowly pulling up until he was looking at you. The silence seemed to last forever. You could read the surprise in his face.

“What are you doing here?” He asked quietly.

“I’m the psychologist they brought in to talk to you.” You answered.

“So you finished college?”

“I did. Took me a little longer, but I think you probably knew that already.”

“I did.” He said.

Remember when I pulled up and said "Get in the car"

And then canceled my plans just in case you'd call?

“It’s been a while.” August breathed.

“Almost 16 years.” You helped.

“Did you….?”

“I did.”

“How is…”

“She. Her name is Julia. She turned 15 last month.” You said. 

He nodded.

“I’m not here to help you.” You said. “I didn’t even know who would be waiting for me here, when they picked me up this morning. But…” You shook your head, getting up from your seat.

“You knew that somewhere on this planet, you had a child, August. And yet you still chose your… beliefs over the security of your own child. Did you even think of her?”

“I…” 

“You know they can make you talk. You are good, but not as good as you think.” You leaned with your back at the wall as you looked at him. 

“You could have stayed all these years back. But looking at you now, I’m happy you didn’t.”

“You don’t know anything about me now.” Was all he said.

“That’s true.” You crossed your arms in front of your chest.

“But I do know, that you will never see the light of the day ever again.” You walked past him to the door.

“You know I loved you, right?” He asked, barely audible.

“Why did you leave me then?” You asked back.

“Because you deserved better…” Were the last words you heard of him, before the door opened and you stepped out.

Back when I was livin' for the hope of it all, for the hope of it all

It was late at night when you got back home.

“Wow Mom, you look like shit.” Your daughter grinned, yet hugging you closely.

“Why are you still up?” You asked with a smile as you looked at her. She had the same fleck of brown in her eye. Just like her father.

“Dad cooked. And by cooked I mean he almost burned the house down.” She whispered, as she walked arm in arm with you into the kitchen where indeed it looked like a bomb exploded.

“Where is your father anyway?” You asked.

“I’m here!” You felt a hand on your lower back as your husband came into the room, his arm on your waist, as he bend down to kiss you.

“How was your day?” He asked. You breathed in deep, shaking your head, mouthing later to him. He frowned but said nothing.

“I’m just glad I’m back home.” You said, your head resting on his shoulder, as you watched your daughter sneak some chocolate out of the fridge, handing it to you on her way out.

“Love you Mom.” She kissed your cheek.

“Good night.” You smiled.

“Are you okay?” Your husband asked.

“I am now.” You smiled as you got on your tiptoes to kiss him deeply. 

[maybeimamuppet]

I think I wanna marry you

hello friends!! this is a request fill for Aubrey_Plaza_Stole_HappiestSeason on ao3.

also, in a previous work, I said cady's middle name was Allison just because I liked the way it sounded, but I was browsing Erika henningsen's instagram and found that she calls her cady Jane as in Jane Goodall, and I like that much better. so, its Jane now. enjoy!

-

“Damian!” Janis calls from the bedroom she shares with Cady in their New York apartment.

“What?!” He calls back.

“Is Caddy home?” She asks loudly, wondering why one of them didn’t just go to the other.

“No!”

“Then come here!”

He comes strolling in casually with a bagel, chewing a mouthful. “Wha’ you wan’?”

“Finish chewing, I don’t want you to choke,” Janis demands, knowing him well. He listens, thankfully, swallowing his bite and coming to sit next to her on the bed.

“Okay, what is it?”

“I want to propose to Caddy,” Janis rushes out. Exactly as she expected, he sucks in a large gasp, dropping his bagel to press a hand over his heart. “Can you help me?”

“Yes!” He says excitedly. “Oh my god, finally!”

“Finally? We’re twenty-two, dude,” Janis says, confused. She’d thought they were a bit young to be thinking of marriage.

“Literally everyone in our friend group expected you to get engaged before we started college and elope,” Damian responds, leveling her with a single look.

“We’d only been dating for, like, four and a half months by the time you and I left, what the hell kind of toxic relationship did you think we have?!” Janis demands.

“You two were absolutely revoltingly in love, you would’ve done it and found a way to make it work. I’m just glad you’ve calmed down a little,” Damian jokes.

“Hm,” Janis huffs, thinking. They had gotten into things pretty quickly in high school. Their temporary long distance relationship had actually done them a lot of favors. “Anyway, can you help me?”

“Yes, of course! How do you want to do it?” He asks, lying down on his tummy and taking another bite of his bagel.

“I was thinking when we go home for Christmas? Like, on Christmas Eve, maybe. I wanted to take her to some fancy ‘holiday’ dinner and then take her on a walk to the clearing by that pond where we had our first date, and propose there?” She says quickly. She’s planned it for a while, but she still wants to make sure it doesn’t sound dumb.

“Aww,” Damian coos. “That sounds great, she’ll love it. What do you want me to do?”

“Help me pick a ring, first of all. And then, since you’re coming back to Illinois with us, help me decorate the place with, like, candles and pretty lights and stuff?” Janis asks, looking to him for approval again.

“Done. You wanna go shopping now?” He asks, shoving the rest of his bagel in his mouth.

“Um... yeah, why not? I’ll be ready in a minute,” She says, pushing him to the door.

————-

Little did Janis know, Cady was across town with Regina, Gretchen, and Karen coming up with a proposal plan of her own. She’d asked them out on a coffee get-together, trying to bribe them into helping her plan everything.

“Hey, Cady!” Gretchen calls from across the café where she’s standing, flanked by her girlfriends. Cady stands to hug them, she’s been so busy working on her PhD that she hasn’t been able to see them much lately.

“Hi! I ordered for all of us, we’re over here,” she says, leading them to a table in the far corner.

“It’s so good to see you, it’s been forever,” Regina says, sitting across from her with Karen, and Gretchen next to Cady.

“Yeah, I’ve missed you guys! My schoolwork is kicking my ass lately,” Cady huffs. “How have you been?”

“Good! We got an axolotl!” Karen says excitedly.

“Aww! I love those, but we can’t have any pets at all in our apartment,” Cady says sadly. “What did you name it?”

“Louboutin,” Gretchen says with a happy smile. “Gina wants to give him a sibling named Gucci.”

“Aww. I wanna come meet him soon,” Cady says.

“Oh, absolutely! We’ll have a girls night soon once our schoolwork eases up a little,” Regina says happily. “What about you, how have you been?”

“Oh, you know. About as good as a PhD student can be,” Cady says with a chuckle. “But really, I’ve been fine. Um, I actually wanted to ask a favor of you guys.”

“Ooh, ulterior motive! What do you need?” Gretchen asks excitedly, still hungry for gossip like she was in high school.

“I want to propose to Janis,” Cady says quickly. All three girls squeal loudly and wrap her in a hug, Regina and Karen leaning over the table and nearly spilling their drinks.

“When?” Karen asks excitedly once they’ve sat back down.

“Where?” Regina adds.

“I was thinking Christmas Eve when we all go back home? Our first date was in this beautiful clearing in the woods by that pond, I was going to do it there,” Cady says quietly.

“Aww,” the three of them coo in the same tone at the same time. It’s frightening how in sync they are, sometimes.

“So what do you need us for?” Karen asks.

“I was hoping you guys could help me pick a ring, and set up the area once the day comes? If you can,” Cady asks. “And Regina, could you take photos? Like, hidden somewhere? I can pay you for them.”

“Yes I can, and no you will not. You’re my best friend, you get free pictures,” Regina says, shaking with excitement.

“You don’t have to do that, Gina,” Cady says, feeling guilty now.

“Cady, honey, I’m still rich. I don’t need your money. Think of it as a favor for me, I need more practice with photographing people anyway.”

“Okay,” Cady says. “Anyway, are you guys free next weekend to go ring shopping?”

“Yes,” all of them say together again.

“Okay then,” Cady giggles. “What have you guys been up to?”

————-

On November first, Regina is sitting on the sofa in her apartment, reading through some emails for work and sipping her favorite peppermint tea. She decides to take a break when her phone pings with a text; her back is starting to bother her anyway.

She stands up to stretch as she checks it, trying not to be too surprised when she finds it’s from Janis.

snarkisian: hey reggie are u going home for christmas ??

notreginald: Yes, why?

snarkisian: are u busy on christmas eve ??

notreginald: Depends on what time. What do you need?

snarkisian: i’m gonna propose to caddy that night and i was wondering if you’d take some pics of it

snarkisian: i’ll pay u for them obviously

Regina sucks in a gasp. They’re planning on proposing on the same night?

notreginald: Aww, congratulations! I’ll see if I’m free, where and when are you planning on doing it? And you don’t have to pay me.

snarkisian: the clearing in the woods where we had our first date, around nightfall. i’m gonna take her to a fake christmas dinner first tho

So, they have exactly the same proposal plan. How cute.

notreginald: Let me check my calendar. I should be free.

She lied, she needs to talk to Damian immediately.

georgewashington: HUBBARD WE HAVE A SITUATION

damecupboard: What happened who do I need to kill

georgewashington: What? Nobody. But Janis and Cady want to propose to each other on the same night and in the same place.

damecupboard: HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLT SHIT

georgewashington: Holt.

damecupboard: Bitch leave me alone

damecupboard: They have the exact same proposal plan??

georgewashington: Exactly the same, except Janis wants to take Cady to dinner first. Cady asked us to help get the area set up beforehand a while ago and asked me to take their engagement pics.

georgewashington: And Janis just texted me asking to take pictures for HER proposal.

damecupboard: Shit

damecupboard: They probably both want the same setup, we could work together and then stick you in a bush or smth

georgewashington: Works for me, other than the bush. I’ll text you later to find out what we need to order. Love you 📷

damecupboard: Bye Reggie!!

She switches back to her text thread with Janis.

notreginald: I’m totally free in the evening that day, so it should work out.

snarkisian: tits! are u sure i can’t pay u??

notreginald: I don’t want your money, Jan. Just spell correctly for once in your life.

snarkisian: noh

notreginald: Figures.

————-

About a week later, Janis and Cady are having their weekly date night. Every Saturday they make a commitment to go on a date. Sometimes they go out for dinner, sometimes they go see a movie, and other times they just go for a walk around the city and chat, catching up on the events of the week.

Tonight, they decide to do one of their favorite things: stay home. Damian has an evening audition and won’t be home until late, so they have the apartment to themselves.

They order in some Indian food, deciding not to cook this time since they’re both exhausted from the week. It’s peaceful, eating their dinner sitting across from each other on the floor, using the coffee table as a dinner table. They chat about how Janis’ work has been, what paintings she’s been doing in her off time, how Cady’s schoolwork is going, little things like that.

Cady cuddles in on top of Janis as they watch a movie, falling asleep slightly as Janis plays with her hair. It’s only about seven in the evening, but she’s so tired and Janis is so warm.

She about jumps out of her skin when Janis’ phone goes off. Their usual rule is no phones on date night, but they both are waiting on some important information so made an exception for tonight. Janis checks the message, her eyes going wide when she sees what it is.

“Cads, I’m really sorry, I have to go,” She says frantically, Cady frowning at her as she’s removed from her embrace.

“Go where? It’s late,” Cady pouts. Janis has never left date night before.

“Um... a work thing,” Janis says. “Emergency. I shouldn’t be more than an hour. Maybe hour and a half.”

It’s clearly a lie, Janis teaches art and tutors English down at their local middle school. None of her students would have an emergency this late on a Saturday night.

“Janis, you’re a teacher, what emergency could possibly happen this late at night? On a weekend?” Cady asks, rubbing her eyes.

“Uhm... not that work, something happened to one of my commissions down at the studio. I have to go check on it.” Janis says, proud of how quickly she came up with that.

“Oh. Okay,” Cady responds, still eyeing her suspiciously. “Be safe.”

“I will. I have my pepper spray,” Janis says, coming to kiss her goodbye quickly. “I love you.”

“I love you too.”

And with that, Cady is left alone. She decides to clean up after their dinner, throwing the containers away and washing the dishes they used. She’s deep in thought as she scrubs away at a plate.

She definitely lied to me, she wouldn’t even look me in the eye. And she spent forever picking that studio because she wanted somewhere good, if something happened to one of her works someone would have known how to fix it.

So where could she have gone? On date night? What was so important? Did she get invited to do something else? With someone else? Maybe I’ve gotten boring. I can’t be very interesting to talk to, all I’ve got going on is school.

That thought makes her pause. Janis couldn’t be sick of her. Could she? Cady takes a deep breath, switching to grab a towel to dry the dishes. She’s been down this road before, she knows she shouldn’t jump to conclusions. But maybe she’ll take time to gather some more evidence first before telling Janis how she’s feeling. That’s probably not a terrible idea.

-

Janis rushes to the subway station near their apartment, even more on edge than she normally is in public. She’d gotten a text notification that the ring she and Damian had chosen was ready, and wants to go check since she’ll be busy making Thanksgiving preparations soon. The shop closes in an hour and is about forty-five minutes away, so she has to hurry.

The shopkeeper looks a little startled when she throws the door open and dashes in, so Janis pauses for a second to make sure she doesn’t look like a robber. She smooths her hair and clothes and heads up to the counter at a much slower pace.

“Um, hi, sorry. I got a text that an engagement ring I ordered is ready?” She says gently.

The employee looks relieved upon realizing Janis isn’t crazy, sighing quietly. “Oh, that’s perfectly understandable. What’s the name for the order?”

“Sarkisian,” Janis responds, bouncing slightly on the balls of her feet.

The employee heads into a back room, returning after a second with a small velvet box. “Here you are.”

Janis opens the box, gasping gently at what she sees. She’d seen it to pick the style, obviously, but something about seeing it in Cady’s size and presented in the fancy box makes it so much more real.

She’d stolen one of Cady’s less fancy rings  to get her size, and when she compares them it’s a perfect match. “This is perfect, thank you so much.”

“Not a problem, ma’am. Best of luck with the proposal.”

This guy is disgustingly polite, she thinks as she heads for the door. “Thank you!” She calls over her shoulder just before she reaches the door.

Once she’s left, she pulls out her phone to text Damian.

janjan: hey i just picked up the ring

janjan: can we meet somewhere so i can give it to u? caddy will be sus if i immediately go to hide something when i get home

damdam: !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

damdam: Yeah I just finished my audition. I’ll be at that noodle place we like, meet me there

janjan: 📷

It’s about a block and a half away from where she is, so she sort of power-walks her way over. She’s still panting slightly by the time she reaches him.

“Lemme see,” Damian demands as soon as he sees her. Janis pulls the box out of her pocket, flipping the lid open to show him. “Oh, Jan, it’s so pretty.”

“Do you think Caddy’ll like it?” Janis asks, shutting it again and handing it over. She’s a little nervous about letting it out of her sight, but she honestly trusts him with it more than herself.

“Of course, Janjan. You picked it for a reason, she’ll love it,” Damian says as he puts it safely in his coat pocket.

“It’d better be worth it. I feel bad, I left in the middle of date night,” Janis says nervously.

Damian pats her shoulder comfortingly. “She’ll understand, Jan. Eventually.”

“I hope so,” Janis mumbles. “Dame?” She asks after a beat.

“Hmm?”

“Why didn’t we just meet at the station?”

“I want noodles.”

————-

They decide to have Thanksgiving with all three of their families together, since everyone was coming to them instead of the other way around. For New York, their apartment is fairly large, but it’s still quite cramped with everyone present.

Janis can cook well enough, but she had recently dropped an entire watermelon on the floor and was subsequently banned from helping prepare any of the meal. She’s in charge of keeping everything presentable while Damian entertains.

So, Cady is preparing the meal with her own mother, as well as Janis’. Ms. Hubbard and Damian both offered to help as well, but their little kitchen isn’t big enough for any more people. Cady is left alone with Ms. Sarkisian as her own mother heads to the restroom, deciding to ask the million dollar question now.

“Ms. Juliette, can I ask you something?” Cady asks. Janis’ mother had insisted on Cady calling her by her first name, but she never quite managed it. Her compromise is still using the title in front of her name. It suits them both well enough.

“Of course, hon,” Ms. Sarkisian says, basting the turkey.

Cady looks quickly to make sure Janis isn’t around before she speaks, talking quietly. “Um... I’m planning on proposing to Janis, around Christmas. I’d like to ask your blessing.” Cady has a feeling it’ll be given, but she’s nervous. They’re still very young, Janis is barely twenty-three.

Ms. Sarkisian gasps happily and comes to hug her. “Of course you have my blessing, I’ve been waiting for this day since you two first started dating. Welcome to the family, honey.”

Cady hugs her back tightly, relieved she agreed. “Thank you.” She hopes she’ll actually be welcomed to the family. Janis has still been acting odd.

-

Janis is ambling around in the living room, out of things to keep tidy for the moment. She’s trying to work up the nerve to talk to Cady’s parents.

When Mrs. Heron comes through to use the restroom, she realizes she might only have this moment to ask them. She takes some deep breaths, standing a little ways away from the bathroom to wait for Cady’s mother.

“Oh, hello, Janis,” Mrs. Heron says as she comes back, wiping some excess water on her pant legs.

“Uh, hi, Mrs. Heron,” Janis stutters. “Can-could I talk to you and Mr. Heron really quick? Um, alone?”

“I’ve told you to call me Betsy, dear. And yes, I’ll go get Chip,” Cady’s mother replies. She returns with her husband after a second, both looking slightly concerned. “Now what is this about?”

Janis swallows and puffs out her chest slightly for confidence. “Uhm, I want to propose to Cady. She loves you two more than anything, so I wanted to ask your blessing.”

Mrs. Heron gasps happily, coming to hug her. Mr. Heron is more stoic, but she sees tears brimming in his eyes.

“Oh, you absolutely have our blessing, dear. Welcome to the family,” Mrs. Heron says.

“Thanks,” Janis breathes. Betsy leaves after that and returns to her daughter in the kitchen. Mr. Heron wraps her in another awkward hug, eventually giving up and pulling back to shake her hand instead.

“You have my blessing. But if you hurt my baby girl, you’ll never see the light of day again,” He says ominously. “Take care of her. Welcome to the family.”

“Um...I don’t plan on it, sir, thank you,” Janis stumbles. “I promise I’ll take care of her.”

“I know you will, I just have to make sure of these things as her father,” Chip replies. “I’ll tell her to do the same for you whenever you propose.”

Janis feels tears prick at her eyes. She knows her mother is protective, but having an actual father figure is nice. “Thank you.”

“You’re welcome, Janis.”

-

They head back to the living room, where everyone else is waiting. Janis shoots Juliana a look, gesturing for her to come over to her.

“What’s up, Janny?” Her sister asks.

“You have to swear to be quiet if I tell you, Caddy can’t know,” Janis threatens.

Juliana looks at her oddly. “Okay.”

Janis pulls out the ring box, prompting a gasp from her sister. Julie slaps a hand over her mouth, squealing into it and doing a little happy dance. “I get another sister! Finally!”

“Shh,” Janis demands. “But yes, hopefully. I’m trusting you with this. I’m gonna propose at Christmas. Can you take this home with you and keep it safe somewhere?”

Julie’s eyes go wide, shocked at the amount of trust her big sister has in her. “Yeah, absolutely. Have you told Mama?”

“No, I’m going to whenever she takes a break. She’s with Caddy, I haven’t been able to get her away.”

“Can I see it?” Julie asks, cradling the ring box carefully and opening it when Janis nods. “Oh, damn. She’s a lucky lady.”

Janis laughs, ruffling her hair. “Thanks, kid, glad you approve.”

“What are we approving, girls? What are you scheming?” Their mother asks as she comes to take a short break from the cooking.

Julie looks to Janis, letting her share the news. “I’m proposing to Caddy. Probably on Christmas Eve.”

Her mom raises her eyebrows, smiling widely when she realizes that they both have the same plan. She comes to hug her, trying to hide her reaction and keep Cady’s proposal a surprise. “Congratulations, baby girl.”

“She hasn’t said yes yet, mama,” Janis reminds her, returning her hug.

“Do you think she’s going to say no?” Juliana asks jokingly.

Janis pauses. “No.”

“Then let her congratulate you, Janny. She’s gonna say yes.” Julie says.

“Okay. Thank you.”

-

“Mom, Daddy, can I talk to you?” Cady asks when Janis goes to grab a second plate from the kitchen.

“Always, binti,” her father replies.

“I’m going to propose to Janis,” Cady says in Swahili just in case Janis is listening. “On Christmas Eve.”

Her parents lock eyes, smiling at each other as they discover each girl has the same plan.

“Congratulations, darling. Treat each other well,” her mother says, trying to stop grinning.

“We will. I love you,” Cady replies as she comes to hug them. She misses the look they shoot Ms. Sarkisian over her shoulders.

-

Once their families leave, headed back home to Illinois in the morning, Janis and Cady have a moment alone in the kitchen as Damian tidies up the living room and heads to bed.

Cady comes up behind Janis as she finishes washing the last few dishes, wrapping her arms around her waist and popping up on her tippy toes to kiss her cheek before squishing her cheek against Janis’ back.

“Hi, baby,” Janis says as she switches to grab another plate.

“Hi,” Cady says. “Today was nice.”

Janis finishes her last dish and turns around, leaning to kiss Cady’s forehead and pulling her in for a tighter hug. She dances them around the kitchen, to a song that exists only in her head. Cady giggles when Janis spins her out and then pulls her back in to kiss her sweetly.

“It was nice. I love you,” Janis says.

“I love you too. I’m thankful for you,” Cady replies, popping up to kiss her again. Janis chuckles, kissing her back.

“I’m thankful for you too, Butterfly. Let’s go to bed, I’m exhausted,” Janis yawns.

“Okay, my love. I’m little spoon tonight,” Cady says.

“Fine.”

————-

Thanksgiving was comforting, but Janis continues acting oddly. She seems distracted, and nervous. Whenever Cady is around she seems on high alert, and spends most of her free time on her phone texting someone. Cady is worried.

On their next date night, Cady decides to go all out. She had told Regina about how strange Janis was acting and asked for advice. She had two girlfriends, after all. Regina had suggested being a bit more bold with her affections to see how Janis responded and going from there.

They have the apartment for the night since Damian is having a sleepover with Karen. They had formed a special bond over the years. They have get togethers every now and again, occasionally joined by Janis and Cady, and every once in a while Regina and Gretchen would join too. It’s cute.

Cady made reservations at their favorite Italian restaurant to surprise Janis, and picks out her sexiest lingerie to go under her slightly revealing green dress. She also decides to wear heels so she can reach Janis’ face more easily.

She styles her hair down, since Janis loves to play with it, and does more makeup than she’s normally comfortable with. She decides to leave her freckles visible, though, since Janis loves those too. She swipes on some red lipstick that she rarely uses and is good to go.

Janis is wearing a green button-down top and some nice black pants, sitting on the couch and waiting for her to finish getting ready. “You ready, ba-whoa.” she says upon seeing her.

“Yeah, let’s go,” Cady says, grabbing her bag and reaching for her. Janis pulls her close before they can leave, wrapping her arms around her waist and kissing her soundly.

“You look incredible. Is there some special occasion I’m forgetting?” She purrs after pulling back, miraculously without having smudged either of their lipsticks.

“No,” Cady says, fiddling with a button on her shirt. “Just wanted to try something new.” Janis’ reaction so far seems to be a good sign.

“Hmm,” Janis hums, looking at her oddly. “Okay. As long as you’re comfortable. You look beautiful.”

“Thanks. You’re not so bad yourself,” Cady pecks her lips one more time before pulling away, taking her hand and leading her out the door. “Now come on, we’re gonna be late.”

-

Cady flirts rather aggressively throughout their whole meal; holding Janis’ hand across the table, listening even more intently than she usually does to her stories, even occasionally winking at her.

Janis seems confused by all the attention, but doesn’t complain. She follows quietly after Cady once she pays and smiles as Cady links their fingers together.

“Do you want to walk and look at the lights?” Cady asks as she turns back to look at her.

“You’re in heels and the shortest dress I’ve ever seen, baby, no. We can walk around but we should take you home to change first,” Janis replies, looking meaningfully at her outfit.

“You don’t like it?” Cady asks with a pout.

“No! I mean yes- I... baby, you look beautiful, I love you in this, I just don’t want you to freeze,” Janis explains. “And you’ll damage your feet walking too far in those.”

“Oh,” Cady says with relief. “Yeah, you’re probably right.”

“You want to head home?” Janis asks.

Cady presses close to her, fiddling with the collar of her shirt. “Yeah,” she purrs. “We can have more fun at home, anyway. Maybe you can help me get out of this.”

Janis lets out a flustered squeak, grabbing her hand and hauling her to a cab.

-

Once they’re both satisfied, Cady pulls Janis to shower with her. “Did you like tonight?”

“Are you kidding? Yeah,” Janis says as Cady gently traces the tattoos covering her arm. “But you’ve been acting kind of... off, are you okay? Did something happen?”

Shit. Janis is onto her. “No, no, I’m fine,” Cady says hastily. “I just wanted to show how much I love you.”

“Aww. Well it was a nice surprise, but I love you all the time, Butterfly,” Janis says as she pulls Cady close to kiss her.

“I love you too.”

Maybe I read things wrong? But what is she up to?

————-

They do actually get to go walk around and see the lights the following weekend. Cady dresses more sensibly this time, in jeans and snow boots. And a Christmas sweater under her coat, which she had talked Janis into matching. Janis had only agreed since their coats would be zipped up.

Cady looks around in childlike wonder at the beautiful lights decorating the neighborhood. She always gets so excited around the holidays. Janis doesn’t think it’ll ever stop being impossibly adorable.

She’s in the midst of trying to process that they’ll hopefully be engaged in about two weeks when Cady suddenly hauls her into an alleyway, pinning her against the wall and kissing her hungrily.

Janis responds in kind, pulling Cady into her and sucking on her lip as she slides her hands into the back pockets of Cady’s jeans. Cady moans quietly, threading her hands through Janis’ short, dark hair and pressing up on her tiptoes to be even closer.

Janis switches their places, turning to lift Cady up and pin her against the wall. Cady squeals in surprise, but locks her legs around Janis’ waist and pulls her back in, giving her lower lip a teasing nip.

Janis pulls back with a gasp for breath, but keeps Cady held against the wall. She groans happily when Cady kisses and nips her cheeks and jaw, letting Janis catch her breath before cupping her face and pressing their lips together again.

Cady is about to ask Janis to take her home so they can continue in private when her phone pings loudly in her pocket. Janis sets her down so she can check it. She blinks in surprise when she sees it’s a text from Aaron.

a-aron: hey, cady! i know it’s been a long time, but i just moved to NY and you’re one of the only people i know in the city. do you want to meet for coffee sometime and catch up?

“Who is it?” Janis asks, but doesn’t try to peek to respect Cady’s privacy.

“Um... it’s Aaron. He just moved to the city, he wants to meet for coffee soon. Would you be okay with that?” Cady asks.

“Damn, he moved here from Cali? At Christmas? Poor dude,” Janis says. “But baby, I don’t control who you meet up with. I trust you, of course you can meet with him.”

“Thanks, lovey. Let me text him back and then we can keep looking around,” Cady hums.

caddy: Sure! Janis and I are going back to Evanston next weekend, though. Are you free this week?

a-aron: does tomorrow work? i could use a break from unpacking. if it’s too short notice that’s fine, damian told me you’re working on your phd. congrats, btw

“What is it?” Janis asks when Cady grins widely.

“He’s been talking with Damian,” Cady says. “Didn’t Damian have a date the other day? And wouldn’t tell us who he was going out with?”

“Oh my god,” Janis squeals. “No way!”

“I think so. I’ll check when I meet with Aaron,” Cady giggles. “One more second, I’m sorry.”

caddy: Thank you! Tomorrow works fine, I’ll text you a good place in a while.

caddy: Oh and Janis says hi :)

a-aron: lol hello janis. see you tomorrow cady

caddy: 📷

“Alright, where were we?” Cady purrs as she pockets her phone again, pulling Janis into another smooch.

————-

The next day, Cady gets ready to meet Aaron around eleven and heads to her favorite local coffee shop.

Aaron is already at a table in the back corner, sipping a mocha as he reads a book.

“Hi, Aaron,” She says, heading over to him.

“Hey, Cady! Long time no see,” Aaron replies, standing and coming to hug her. It’s been about six months since they’ve seen each other, since he came to Regina’s college graduation party in May.

“I know, it’s good to see you!” Cady says as she sits down. “So, what brings you to New York?”

“Work, actually,” Aaron replies. “I was offered a job here and decided to go for it. I was actually kind of lonely all the way out in California. My college friends are all good people, but everyone I’m really connected to is out here now.”

“Like Damian?” Cady teases.

“How did-oh, did I tell you about that?” Aaron stutters. “It’s- we’re not, like, a thing. Or anything.”

“Do you want to be?” Cady asks gently. Aaron had come out as biromantic and asexual during his sophomore year of college. He and Damian would be cute together.

“YeahIreallydo,” Aaron says quickly before abruptly changing the subject. “Anyway, um, how have you and Janis been? Is she still doing art?”

Cady sighs, but smiles at the mention of her girlfriend. “Yeah. She actually teaches art now, to middle schoolers. And she has a commission business she runs on the side. And everything is great with us, I’m actually planning on proposing to her soon.”

Aaron gasps happily. “Congratulations, Cades! When are you doing it?”

“Christmas,” Cady grins. “Well, Christmas Eve. I have a lot to plan still, though.”

“I could help, I’m going to visit family in Evanston too. I’m assuming Damian or Regina is helping you?” Aaron asks.

“Regina, and Gretchen and Karen. Damian’s been busy with something else, but I’ve told him it’s happening,” Cady replies. “If you want to help, that would be great. Regina has been doing most of the shopping, I think.”

“I’ll shoot her a text later. Am I invited to the wedding?” Aaron asks jokingly.

“Of course,” Cady chides. “If it actually happens.”

“Cady, you and Janis are perfect for each other, she’s going to say yes. We’ve all been waiting for this since we were in high school.”

“But we were only dating for a few months in high school,” Cady says.

“But you’ve been in love with her since you met her,” Aaron replies. “I didn’t really notice it when we were together, but you never looked at me the way you look at her. I’m glad everything has worked out for you two.”

Cady is stunned. “Um. Thank you,” she stutters. “I think. So, what were you doing in California after you graduated?”

“I work in accounting now,” Aaron says. “Yes, it is as boring as it sounds. Um, I joined a rec soccer league for a while, that was cool. And I...uh, never mind.”

“No, what? Come on, you can tell me,” Cady coaxes, thanking the waiter as he delivers her tea.

“I dabbled in drag,” Aaron mumbles. Cady chokes on her tea, spitting it back into her mug.

“Oh my god! Really?!” She splutters. “Do you still do it?”

“I haven’t found anywhere to do it here yet, but technically, yes,” Aaron replies.

“What’s your drag name?” Cady demands excitedly. This is an incredible revelation.

“Lois Carmen Denominator,” Aaron says as he flushes. Cady chokes again. Of course he picked a math pun.

“Oh my god, that’s incredible,” she breathes. “Have you told Damian? He loves that stuff.”

“No, we, um. We’ve only met up the once. Somehow that didn’t come up,” Aaron says. “But I’ll let him know.”

“Yes! That’s so neat, you’ll have to let me know when you find somewhere. I’ll come to see you perform,” Cady says excitedly.

“Sure, Cades,” Aaron chuckles. “Um, has Damian, like, mentioned me at all?”

Cady grins. Now it’s her turn to play matchmaker. “Not by name,” she teases. “But he was going on and on about this super hot guy he managed to get a date with the other day.”

Aaron flushes again. “He thinks I’m hot?”

“Apparently,” Cady giggles. “Did you go out with him on Wednesday?”

“Yeah,” Aaron says, his voice a few octaves higher.

“Then yes, he thinks you’re hot,” Cady replies.

Aaron is doing his best tomato impression by this point. “Oh. Wait, what do I do now?”

“You’re so flustered, oh my god! Text him, ask to meet again,” Cady says. “He’ll say yes, he was a total mess when he came home the other day.”

“Okay,” Aaron says as he pulls out his phone. He taps out a message quickly, and his face splits in a wide grin when he gets a notification in response a few minutes later. “We’re gonna go see a movie in Evanston when we’re both there next week.”

“Aww, yay! You guys will make such a good couple,” Cady squeals.

“Uh, thanks,” Aaron says sheepishly. His phone pings again. “Oh, shit, I gotta go. I’m sorry.”

“No, I should be going too. Don’t worry about it,” Cady replies as she picks up her bag and orders a to-go iced coffee for Janis. “This was nice.”

“It was. I guess if everything goes well with Dame we’ll be seeing a lot more of each other,” Aaron says. “Later, Cady.”

“Bye!”

-

“Janis!” Cady calls as she slams the door to the apartment open.

“Jesus!” Janis yelps from her spot on the couch. “Baby, don’t do that!”

“Sorry. I got you a coffee,” Cady says sheepishly. “And Aaron and Damian are together. Or almost, anyway. They went on a date last week and they’re gonna go see a movie together when we go home next week. I was excited to tell you. Oh, and Aaron is a drag queen!”

Janis chokes. “He what? Oh, Damian’s gonna love that. He’ll have a hell of a time trying to explain this to us later. Don’t tell him you know anything, this is hilarious.”

“It is kind of funny,” Cady giggles. “Is anyone we were friends with in high school straight?”

Janis thinks for a second. “Kevin?”

“No, he’s aroace,” Cady replies. “He just has a pet lizard.”

“Good for him,” Janis says. “I guess gays do kind of flock together. Must be pheromones or some shit.”

“Homomones,” Cady says absently, making Janis burst out laughing.

“Yeah,” She giggles, wiping tears from her eyes. “Anyway, did you have a good time?”

“I did. It was nice to see him again,” Cady says. “But I missed you.”

“Aww,” Janis coos. “I missed you too. I was supposed to be working on a new commission I got but I kept getting distracted and sketching you instead. Thanks for the coffee, Butterfly.”

“Ooh, can I see?” Cady asks. She loves Janis’ art, no matter how simple a sketch it may be. “And you’re welcome, my love.”

Janis hands over her sketchbook, open to a page covered in little doodles of Cady’s face.

“These are good, lovey!” Cady says as she flicks through a few pages. “There’s a lot of them, though.”

“Yeah, I get distracted a lot,” Janis mumbles. “But thanks. Glad you don’t think it’s creepy.”

“Of course not,” Cady chides. “It’s cute.”

“You’re cuter,” Janis challenges.

Cady kisses her to shut her up, not even slightly taking the bait. “Thank you. I’m gonna go change, I’ll be right back.”

“Okay.”

-

Cady comes back quickly as she promised, but somehow different. She kisses Janis again in greeting and plops down next to her, tapping away on her phone.

“Welcome back,” Janis says jokingly. Cady either doesn’t hear or doesn’t care, not even looking up. “Butterfly?”

“Hm?” Cady hums.

“Did something happen?” Janis asks concernedly. She can’t tell if the furrow in Cady’s brow is from concentration or concern.

“Huh? Oh, no, everything is fine. I just have something to... work on,” Cady says. “I’ll be done in a while.”

“Oh. Okay,” Janis says suspiciously. “I love you.”

“I love you too,” Cady replies, but she still doesn’t look up. It doesn’t sound like there’s any meaning behind the words this time. That’s concerning.

“Are you sure you’re okay?” Janis asks.

“Yes, Janis, everything’s fine,” Cady huffs, sounding a bit irritated.

“Sorry. Just wanted to make sure,” Janis mumbles.

“Thank you, love, but I’m okay. I’ll tell you if something happens,” Cady says as she finally looks up.

“Okay,” Janis replies. Cady goes back to her phone then, continuing... whatever she’s up to.

Janis pulls out her own phone, playing a game Damian had gotten her hooked on.

“Lovey, would you please go get my charger?” Cady asks after about an hour and a half.

“Sure, baby,” Janis replies as she stands up to stretch. She heads to the bedroom to grab both chargers, coming back and plugging them into the wall. Hers doesn’t reach back to her spot, so she lies her head on Cady’s lap and resumes her scrolling.

“Thank you, Jellybean,” Cady replies, plugging her own phone in and continuing her activities as she strokes her other hand through Janis’ hair.

After another hour or so, Janis gets bored. She clicks her phone off and sits up, but crawls back to Cady for cuddles.

“Janis,” Cady huffs. “What are you doing?”

“I’m bored,” Janis whines. “Snuggle me.”

“Fine, come here,” Cady pulls her closer and lets Janis cuddle into her shoulder. Janis gets comfortable and closes her eyes, falling asleep almost immediately.

-

She wakes a couple hours later, checking hastily to make sure she hasn’t been drooling all over Cady’s shoulder. She hasn’t, luckily, but she seems to have stirred a few times before, because Cady tries to shush her back to sleep.

“I’m awake, Cads,” Janis replies. “Sorry.”

“It’s okay, love. Did you have a nice nap?” Cady asks. She’s still working on her phone.

“Yeah,” Janis mumbles and cuddles back into her shoulder. “Still working?”

“I’m almost done,” Cady replies distractedly.

“Mmkay. What do you want for dinner?” Janis asks from her perch on her lap.

“Huh? Oh, can we have tacos? I bought the stuff the other day,” Cady says.

Janis nods, but makes no effort to move. “Sure, that sounds good.”

She sits for a few more minutes before she sits up, deciding to try to squeeze in a make out session before she goes to cook.

But Cady turns away. She tilts her head so Janis’ lips end up on her cheek. Janis whines in frustration.

“Caddy!”

“What, Janis?” Cady asks in exasperation.

Janis does her best puppy eyes. They aren’t quite as good as Cady’s, but they do the job well enough. “Pay attention to meeeeee.”

“Janis! This is important,” Cady says as she looks over Janis’ shoulder to continue working.

Janis’ face falls. More important than me? “Fine. I’m gonna go cook.”

“Janis, wait, I’m sorry,” Cady says, reaching for her again.

“It’s fine. You keep working,” Janis mumbles, leaving her alone as she heads into the kitchen.

-

Cady comes in sheepishly when she calls her to eat. “Love, I’m sorry, I didn’t mean it. I just- I have a lot going on, I took it out on you, I’m sorry.”

“It’s fine, baby. Don’t worry about it, I understand. Just tell me next time so I don’t push you like that,” Janis replies. “Now come eat.”

“I will. I love you,” Cady says, kissing Janis sweetly before taking her plate.

“I love you too,” Janis hums, kissing her back.

————-

Cady seems almost embarrassed for the next week or so, still upset with herself for making Janis sad. Janis tries to cheer her up, making it very clear she understands that Cady didn’t mean it, but Cady still seems nervous around her.

Cady feels like she should do something to make up for it. She hadn’t meant to ignore Janis like that, but Regina was trying to check that everything was ordered for the proposal. Cady wanted to step things up even further and had to tell her to order extra things. Then, an issue had come up with Cady’s card, so she’d had to fix that over text all with Janis asleep on her lap.

Janis had woken up at the worst possible moment. Cady was very much not in the mood for kissing by that point, but she knows she should have told Janis she was stressed rather than just turning away and continuing her work. Of course that had upset her.

So, Cady decides to make sushi for dinner. It’s Janis’ favorite food, and Cady thinks it had helped them start dating back in high school. She picks up the ingredients on her way home from classes and starts preparing everything while she waits for Janis to come home from work.

Cady doesn’t like sushi herself, so she makes her own ‘sashimi’ with plain rice and cooked chicken instead of the raw fish she uses for Janis’. Damian had a callback to go to and wouldn’t be home until late at night. She makes him some anyway and leaves it in the fridge with a sweet note.

“What’s up, fuckers?!” Janis calls as she slams the apartment door open. Cady jumps, nearly losing a finger to the sushi knife she was holding. She hopes that one day Janis will stop doing that every time she comes home. But, for now, it’s strangely endearing.

“I’m in the kitchen, Damian’s not home,” she replies once she’s recovered from the brief shock. “I have something for you.”

“Uh oh,” Janis replies as she takes off her boots and coat and heads into the kitchen. “Aww! You made sushi again?”

“Yeah. To make up for the other day. And because I love you,” Cady answers, showing off the maki rolls she had plated into a smiley face. “Tah-dah.”

Janis squeals, coming to hug her girlfriend. She had been a little concerned that Cady might’ve beaten her to a proposal.

“Thank you, Peanut,” Janis says. “I love you.”

“You’re welcome, mpendwa. I love you too. How was work?” Cady asks as she sits across from her at their tiny dining table.

“Good, actually,” Janis replies. “One of my kids actually brought me an apple after lunch.”

“Aww, how sweet,” Cady says. “Was it the gay one?”

“Yeah,” Janis chuckles in reply. She was one of the only openly gay teachers in her district, so she provided a safe space for a lot of her students. It was healing for her, in a way, to be what she needed at that age. “He told me to say hi to you, by the way.”

“They know about me?” Cady asks as she eats a bite of her special sashimi.

“They know I have a girlfriend, for sure,” Janis hums in reply. “If I had a dollar for every time they tell me to ‘shut up about your girlfriend, Ms. S,’ I could buy this whole complex. And I have pictures of you guys around, so I think they’ve pieced together who you are.”

“Aww. That’s so cute,” Cady coos, leaning over for a kiss.

“I’m glad you think so,” Janis chuckles as she kisses her back sweetly. “What about you, how was school? Did you finish that assignment you were working on?”

“Assign- oh. Yeah, I did,” Cady says, briefly confused until she remembers Janis thought she was working on schoolwork instead of her proposal plan that day. “But it’s for that one professor, so I probably won’t find out my grade until sometime during break.”

“That’s shit,” Janis says through a mouthful of sushi. “But good job, I bet you did great.”

“Thanks,” Cady chuckles. She uses her own chopsticks to feed Janis a piece of her sushi, and Janis does the same. Before they know it the food is gone, so Janis takes their dishes to the sink before coming to pick Cady up, carrying her to the bedroom for cuddles.

-

Christmas Eve finally rolls around a few weeks later. Cady and Janis are staying with their own families for the week, and they would fly home with Damian on Boxing Day.

Janis had told Cady she wanted to take her out for Christmas Dinner, so she borrows her mom’s car and heads to pick Cady up. It’s only been about three days since she’s seen Cady, but they’ve both missed each other.

“Janis!” Cady squeals, opening the door before Janis could even knock. She’s in a tight green top and dark dress pants, unknowingly matching Janis, who is in a red top and also in dark dress pants. Cady has on heels, though, to make it easier to kiss Janis.

“Hi, baby,” Janis chuckles, picking her up for a second and spinning them around. “Your carriage awaits.”

“Why thank you, my lady, shall we be off?” Cady replies in character with a giggle.

“Indeed,” Janis says.

-

They have a lovely meal at their favorite restaurant from high school, the same place they had eaten before their senior prom.

Cady holds Janis’ arm as they exit, the ring box burning a hole in her coat pocket. “Lovey? Do you want to walk a little? We’re not too far from that clearing you took me to on our first date, we could go there.”

“I was just going to say that,” Janis replies. “Let’s drive a little closer, it’s cold, but then we can walk.”

“Okay, you’re right,” Cady giggles. “Let’s go, it’s getting dark.”

Janis runs after her, as Cady hauls her across the parking lot.

-

They chat and reminisce about how far they’ve come as they walk through the woods, neither of them quite noticing that the snow has been cleared from the path they’re walking on.

Both of them grin when the clearing comes into view, each of them thinking they’re about to propose and the other has no idea.

Cady pauses in the middle, turning quickly to look around at the gorgeous set up she thinks Regina, Gretchen, and Karen have done, not knowing that Damian and Aaron also had a hand.

Lights are strung up through all the trees and bushes nearby, and candles light their way to a little altar, with a picture of the two of them together that says “Marry Me?” in what looks suspiciously like Gretchen’s best calligraphy. Snow is fluttering down around them, leaving cold little kisses on her face.

Cady is stunned when she turns back to find Janis on one knee behind her. She had known that they were probably going to be engaged by the time they left, but not that Janis would propose first.

She gasps in shock, covering her mouth with her hands as tears start pouring from her eyes.

“Caddy,” Janis begins, reaching for one of her hands. “Cady. I can’t even begin to tell you how much I love you, how much you mean to me. You’ve changed me, changed my life, and it’s so, so much better with you in it. You make me want to stay. I don’t have the words to explain how thankful I am to have met you, and that I get to spend my life with you.”

Janis reaches into her pocket with her free hand and pulls out a ring box. Cady gasps again when she sees it. It’s a white gold band, made of two strands woven together. One strand is decorated with little diamonds, and there’s a larger one in the center of the ring. It’s absolutely beautiful.

“And I want to spend the rest of it with you, if you’ll have me. Cady Jane Heron, will you marry me?” Janis asks, holding up the ring.

Cady is almost crying too hard to speak at this point, but she manages to nod and barely choke out a “Yes, of course.”

She lets Janis slide the ring on her finger, choking back a sob, before she tackles Janis to the ground and weeps into her neck.

“Baby, please don’t cry so hard, why are you crying?” Janis asks in alarm, ignoring the fact that she’s lying in several inches of snow in favor of holding her fiancée closer.

“Because I love you,” Cady sobs. “I’m so happy.”

“I’m happy too, Peanut. Do you want to go look at what Damian did?” Janis asks.

Cady nods and rolls off of her but just holds Janis’ outstretched hand instead of using it to stand up herself.

“Baby, what are you- oh my god,” Janis says, confused until Cady also shifts to be on one knee. Cady uses her free hand to wipe the tears from under her eyes, sniffling and clearing her throat to try and get herself back under control.

“Janis, my love,” she begins after a moment. “I wish it hadn’t taken me so long to realize it, but I’ve loved you since I met you. I had no idea that the moment you saved me from that bathroom was the moment I met the love of my life. You are the most wonderful gift I’ve ever been given, and I treasure every moment I get to spend with you. I’m so excited for our forever; I love you so much. I know this is kind of a moot point now, but... Janis Olivia Sarkisian, will you marry me?”

Janis is absolutely full-on ugly crying by this point, mascara tracking down her face as she holds back sobs with her free hand. They’re technically already engaged, but she nods rapidly and sobs out a “Yes!”

Cady slides on Janis’ ring gently, a matching white-gold band, but more simple, with a single diamond in the center. Cady had also gotten the date they met, the date they started dating, and the date they got engaged engraved onto the inside of the band.

Janis hauls her up and crashes their lips together, kissing Cady so hard she thinks her lips might bruise as the cheers of their friends echo around them.

They both jump apart and scream as Regina leaps out from a bush, in a suit used by hunters and with her face even painted green. The rest of their friends also come out from behind various trees and shrubs, Damian climbing down from up above them and nearly falling to the ground until Aaron catches him.

Everyone comes to wrap them in a tight group hug, shouting their congratulations over one another. Regina stays out to take more photos before reluctantly coming and joining the cuddle.

“Reggie, what the fuck are you wearing?” Janis asks with a watery chuckle, still crying slightly.

“It’s called a ghillie suit. I didn’t want you to see me,” Regina answers as if it’s entirely normal for her to be covered in fake leaves and moss.

“We both knew you were coming, and it’s dark,” Cady replies, trying to hold back hysterical laughter. “You could have hidden behind a tree like everyone else.”

Regina apparently only realizes that now, scowling slightly. “Shit. Go big or go home, I guess.”

“Thanks, Reg,” Janis laughs. “Thank all of you.”

“Yeah, thank you guys! This really is beautiful,” Cady giggles. “God, Jay, did everyone know we were both going to do this except-“

“Us? Yeah, apparently,” Janis answers, hugging her again.

“Let us see the rings!” Karen calls, so they both extend their left hands for everyone to grab and coo over. Regina gets one more shot of Cady’s small hand resting in Janis’, showing off both of their engagement rings in a cute way.

“Okay, Damian and Aaron said they’d stay to clean this back up, Gina needs to go make herself... not green, and you two are probably going to go have wild sex somewhere, so I’m gonna take my girlfriends and go. Congratulations!” Gretchen cheers, hauling Regina and Karen away by the hand.

“Gretchen!” Regina scolds. “Congratulations, guys!”

“Yeah, congrats! Confetti emoji!” Karen calls over her shoulder.

Cady and Janis lock eyes once they’ve gone, both bursting into laughter. Gretchen was not wrong.

“Do you guys need us to stay for anything? I don’t want to leave you two here alone to clean up all of this,” Cady asks anxiously.

Damian and Aaron look at one another knowingly. “I think we’ll be fine, Cads.”

“Oh really? You’ll be fine here all alone? Have you two finally said it?” Janis teases.

Damian sticks his tongue out at her, but does reach for Aaron’s hand. “Yes. Are you satisfied now?”

Janis squeals and comes to hug him, Cady following quickly. “Good job, D, you finally got your hunk!”

“Yeah, yay!” Cady piggybacks. “But really, are you sure you don’t need help?”

“Cady, we’ll be fine. Go have your night with your fiancée,” Aaron says. Cady takes the poster from the altar, but is eventually persuaded to take Janis’ hand to lead them back to the car.

-

Cady had booked a fancy hotel room for the night, figuring she would either be having the night of her life with her fiancée or alone drowning her sorrows in ice cream and champagne.

Janis pins her to the bed instantly, tenderly removing her shirt and shoes as their lips meet again and again. Cady reaches to hold her head in place, before undoing the buttons on Janis’ shirt and flinging it across the room.

-

Janis pulls her close once they’re cleaned from their evening of passion, both of them wearing nothing but their rings (except Cady’s socks).

“We’re getting married, Janis,” Cady whispers excitedly. “You’re gonna be my wife.”

“Yeah, we are. And you’re gonna be my wife,” Janis replies, kissing her sweetly.

“I can’t believe this is what you were up to,” Cady huffs. “I knew you were being sneaky, I should’ve known.”

“You were the sneaky one! I thought you had some crazy homework assignment, I was wondering why you wouldn’t let me help you with anything,” Janis retaliates. Cady starts giggling then, seemingly at nothing. “What?”

“I just-I can’t believe we had the exact same idea,” Cady says between fits of laughter. “I was still surprised when you did yours because I thought everything was set up for mine.”

“Oh,” Janis says, laughing too. “I guess we’re just that in sync. We were meant to be.”

“Meant to be indeed,” Cady replies, pulling her down on top of her for another kiss. “I love you.”

“I love you too, Butterfly. When should we get married?” Janis asks.

“I’ve always wanted a spring wedding,” Cady hums. “Like, April or early in May, maybe. What about you?”

“I dunno, I never really... thought this would happen to me,” Janis hums. “I never had a dream wedding. A spring one sounds nice, we could do it outside. But do you really think we can plan a whole wedding that fast?”

“Aww, my love. I’m so glad I get to marry you,” Cady says sadly. “I think we could, if we really work on it. I don’t want anything crazy, and I don’t think you do either?” Janis shakes her head. “Yeah, so if we do something small, I think we can do it that fast. And if not, we’ll do it the next year.”

“God, no, I don’t want to wait anymore,” Janis breathes. “Even April sounds too far away.”

Cady smiles widely. “You’re too cute. I love you so much.”

“I love you more,” Janis teases. “We can plan more later. Come cuddle me.”

“I love you most. Fiancée,” Cady says in retaliation as she snuggles into Janis to go to sleep.

“Fiancée.” Janis replies, pecking her lips.

“Lovey.” Cady says, pecking her back.

“Baby.”

“Jellybean.”

“Butterfly.”

“Sweetheart.”

“Peanut.”

“Darling.”

“Kitkat.”

“Mpendwa.”

“Wait, I’ve always wondered what that means,” Janis replies. “And the other one, um-“

“Mpenzi? That means, like, love or partner, or favorite. Mpendwa means dear or dearest.”

“Oh. That’s cute,” Janis squeaks. “Mon coeur.”

“Aww, I’m your heart?” Cady coos. “How sweet, Bluejay.”

“You might as well be, I can’t live without you,” Janis says. “I love you.”

Cady cuddles impossibly closer, tipping her face up to kiss her again. “I love you so much. So, so much.”

“Goodnight, fiancée,” Janis says as she kisses her goodnight.

“Goodnight, fiancée,” Cady yawns back, nuzzling into her chest and falling into a blissful sleep, Janis following quickly.

I can’t wait to marry you.

-

hope you enjoyed!

requests are still open, please leave them either here, on my wattpad, or on my ao3. all are the same handle, maybeimamuppet. it may take a few weeks for your request to be published, but I am cranking them out as fast as I can and I will get to everyone's eventually.

thanks for reading!

lots of love,

ezzy

[alcalavicci]

1988 interview with Dean. This is a really good one and helps bring more of his life into perspective. Note: the newspaper originally censored his swearing, but I’ve put it back.

Guthman, Edward. "Dean Stockwell: Third Time's a Charm." The San Francisco Examiner (San Francisco, California), August 14, 1988.

“Six years ago, Dean Stockwell's acting career had turned to dust. Reduced to playing parts in unreleasable, made-in-Mexico movies that now make him cringe, Stockwell decided to chuck it all and get out of Hollywood.

“Along with his second wife, Joy, Stockwell moved to Santa Fe, settled down under the wide New Mexico sky and applied for a real estate license. He even placed an ad in Daily Variety to announce his exile: 'Dean Stockwell will help you with all your real estate needs in the new center of creative energy.'

“Stockwell never sold a house; he didn't need to. Instead, almost as soon as he'd relocated, things started happening to the former 1940s child star. It began with a small part in David Lynch's 'Dune,' and escalated with an important supporting role in Wim Wenders' highly regarded 'Paris, Texas.'

“Moving back to California to cash in on his fortune, Stockwell acted in 'Beverly Hills Cop II,' 'Gardens of Stone,' and 'To Live and Die in L.A.' He also played a cameo role, as Howard Hughes, in the newly released 'Tucker: The Man and His Dream.' And in 'Blue Velvet,' David Lynch's American nightmare, he delivered a chilling cameo as Ben, a waxlike, sexually ambiguous drug dealer.

“And now, at 52, Stockwell says he's found 'the favorite role I've had, by far.'

“The picture is 'Married to the Mob,' a dark, romantic comedy by Jonathan Demme ('Melvin and Howard,' 'Stop Making Sense') and Stockwell plays Mafia don Tony 'the Tiger' Russo. Wearing an Al Capone fedora and full-length vicuna coat, Tony is a rich, sardonic, larger-than-life character -- the kind Stockwell has never had a chance to play until now.

“Opening Friday at the Galaxy and UA the Movies, 'Married to the Mob' has been touted as Demme's first shot at a genuine box-office winner. Set in Long Island, New Jersey and Florida, it stars Michelle Pfeiffer as Angela DeMarco, a young Mafia wife who tries to start a new life when her husband, Frankie 'the Cucumber' DeMarco, is pumped full of lead during a hot-tub tryst at the Fantasia Motel.

“When Stockwell's character isn't ordering hits, drug deals and the dumping of toxic waste, he's lusting assiduously after the gorgeous widow. Meanwhile, bumbling FBI agent Mike Downey (played by Matthew Modine) is jumping through hoops trying to shadow Angela and 'catch Tony with his pants down.' Instead, he falls in love with Angela.

“During a recent luncheon interview, not far from his central California home, Stockwell spoke about the film, about his new happiness as the father of two children and about the bizarre trajectory of his long career. Dressed in a long-sleeved shirt and slacks, wearing a Panama hat and drawing first on a cigaret, later on a cigar, Stockwell emanates prosperity and calm.

“'I don't know why I was unemployed so long,' he says, reflecting on a fallow period that started in the '60s and lasted the better part of two decades. 'The only thing I can figure out in my own mind is that, for some reason or another, I was being made to wait until a certain time in my life when my talent would reach its full maturity and fruition.'

“Ironically, he says, he felt just as equipped 10 years ago to do the work he's doing now -- 'only I couldn't get fucking arrested.'

“Today, Stockwell sees harmony in the fact that his new success coincides with the arrival of two children. His son, Austin, will be 5 in November, and his daughter, Sophia, turns 3 this month. Inordinately proud and protective, he refuses to allow his children to be photographed, and also requests that the town in which he and his family reside not be named. (There were no children from his first marriage, to Millie Perkins, which lasted from 1960 to 1962.)

“'I want to make a lot of money and I want to put it away for my children,' he says. To that end, Stockwell has been snapping up job offers. 'A lot of people ask me, "How have you been able to choose these wonderful things you're doing? Have you been very selective?" And I have to tell them, "I haven't been choosing what I'm doing." Things have been coming and I've been accepting virtually anything that's come.'

“Stockwell's ambition is so great that, for the first time in his life, he actively pursues aspects of his career that he once shunned- interviews, for example.

“'My entire motivation in life is my family,' he says. 'I don't need to get an award. I don't need recognition. I've had that already. What I need is to provide. The best way I can provide is to be successful, and the best way I can be successful is to take advantage of all the things at my disposal to achieve that, one of which certainly is press.'

“Take a look at the young Stockwell, specifically the version that emerges from old magazine and newspaper interviews, and you meet another person altogether.

“Robbed of a normal childhood, Stockwell had made 22 films by the time he was 15 -- including 'The Boy with Green Hair,' 'Kim,' 'Anchors Aweigh,' and the Oscar-winning 'Gentleman's Agreement.' Working nonstop, he had a privileged life that millions of children probably envied, but he loathed it nonetheless.

“The son of show-business parents -- his father, Harry Stockwell, was the voice of the Prince in 'Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs,' and his mother, Betty Veronica, was a former stage dancer -- Stockwell made his professional debut at 7. It all happened by a fluke: when Stockwell accompanied his older brother, Guy, on a Broadway audition, the casting director took a liking to both boys, and cast each one. The play, aptly enough, was called 'Innocent Voyage,' and it led to an MGM contract for curly-haired Dean.

“From the beginning, the pressure on young Stockwell was intense. His parents had divorced when he was 6, and when his father defaulted on child-support payments, Dean reluctantly became the family provider. Over a six-year period, he averaged three to four films per year.

“At home, he says, 'There was a lot of friction... I was getting all the attention, but I hated it. [Guy] couldn't appreciate that, because he wasn't getting the attention. He had all these friends, his peer group, that he took for granted. I had none and I resented him for being able to live that way. I was fucking lonely.'

“When he was 13, chained to a seven-year contract, Stockwell was described by one magazine as 'a young rebel who despises acting and resents every moment it takes from his fleeting boyhood.' Many years later, Stockwell told columnist Hedda Hopper, 'Child actors exist in a sort of limbo between childhood and maturity and belong to neither. Adults take them too seriously and other children are either awed or hostile. A child actor can find friends in neither group.'

“Finally, Stockwell fled Hollywood when he was 16. He cut off his curly locks, started using his real name, Robert Stockwell, and for the next five years roamed the country, working menial jobs and disavowing his true identity. 'People that might have known me from seeing my films knew me as a young child,' he remembers. 'Now I was 17 and I wasn't that recognizable.'

“Around the time of his 21st birthday, Stockwell was pushing papers as mail boy to a Manhattan plumbing firm. 'Of all the jobs that I'd had in those intervening years,' he remembers. 'I think I hated that worse than anything. I came to the realization I had no training at anything. My primary education was very skimpy, very poor, and happened under the worst type of conditions. I was literally at the mercy of the world.'

“Most of Stockwell's childhood earnings were squandered by crooked accountants, he says, and he knew that the tiny sum being held in a trust wouldn't last forever. 'So I thought, "What am I gonna do? Well, let's go back and attack this [acting career] again, and see if I can do it a little more on my terms."'

“What followed for Stockwell was a brief but impressive 'second career.' He starred in the 1959 film 'Compulsion,' based on the Leopold-Loeb case of the '20s, and won a joint acting award with Orson Welles and Bradford Dillman at the Cannes Film Festival. He played the lead in the 1960 film of D. H. Lawrence's 'Sons and Lovers,' and in 1962 scored the plum role of Edmund Tyrone in Sidney Lumet's film version of 'Long Day's Journey Into Night,' holding his own alongside Katharine Hepburn, Ralph Richardson and Jason Robards.

“Stockwell was winning the best parts, but found his attention drifting elsewhere. What was happening, he says, were the first signs of the '60s youth revolution. 'It captured my imagination as much as anybody's. And it represented to me -- I can see this in retrospect -- something in childhood that I had missed: the freedom and loving being alive, without responsibilities and work and having to report to the studio every day, and deal with fans and interviews and shit that I hated when I was a kid.'

“So Stockwell called his agent, said, 'I'm not workin',' and dropped out once again. When he tried to come back three years later, though, 'I found it very difficult, 'cause I'd been out-of-sight, out-of-mind.' What followed was a long period of marginal employment: He found some TV work, took parts in low-budget trash ('The Dunwich Horror') and occasional oddities (Dennis Hopper's 'The Last Movie') and co-directed a film with musician Neil Young ('Human Highway') but often just didn't work at all. At one point, he went 18 months without a job.

“Today, along with his buddy Hopper, Stockwell is enjoying a major career renaissance. And with his starring role in 'Married to the Mob,' he says, he's never felt more confident.

“'I knew before I started the film that this character was going to work in spades,' he says, adding that Demme, as director, deserves credit for taking a risk with such offbeat casting. Instead of picking Peter Falk, Vincent Gardenia or another ethnically identified actor to play the Mafia don, he went with Stockwell (who is actually half-Italian on his mother's side).

“Demme's inspiration occurred on a flight from Los Angeles to New York, when he opened a copy of the Hollywood Reporter. Stockwell had just changed agents, and in order to announce the fact, had taken out a full-page ad. Demme saw the picture, and instantly recognized his Tony.

“Weirdly enough, Stockwell made another film immediately prior to 'Married to the Mob': a Canadian feature called 'Palais Royale,' due for an October release, in which he plays a character almost identical to Tony Russo.

“'It's very curious,' he says. 'For all my years I'd never had a role like this come my way, and here it was twice. The Mafia don in New York, the Mafia don in Toronto, both of them colorful and charming and also threatening. And I just thought, "What am I gonna do? It's the same character." So I decided to do the same character in both those movies.'

“To take the coincidence 'one nauseating step further,' Stockwell says he's also got a part in the recently completed 'Backtrack,' Hopper's next film. This time he plays a corrupt mob lawyer, dropping the Italian accent for a generalized East Coast sound.

“It would be difficult to find a film actor who's busier than Stockwell at this moment. And it would be difficult to find anyone whose job history better illustrates the vicissitudes, serendipities and insecurity of a Hollywood career.

“Looking back on his misfortunes -- at the career that he was forced to accept as a child, and the humiliation he felt when he couldn't maintain it as an adult -- Stockwell says he's not bitter. 'When you reach your maturity, I think it behooves you to accept the fact that it's absolutely futile and fruitless even to speculate on changing anything in your life. All you can do is get embittered. So I accept everything that's happened as part of my life, and try to push it in a positive direction from the moment right now.'”