#realising that i am both the writer who writes too much and too little at the same time

[sophiethewitch1]

theres currently 194 chapter ideas for www. i need... i need to condense... urgkjfdbkjgf

[moonchild1]

min yoongi fic rec list (Ⅵ)

she's back bet you didn't think i'd post another list this quick but since they've been building so much i figured why not soooo this week is yoongs and next week with be taehyung i've been reading alot lately so i wanted to share them asap so before my week gets hectic again i thought i'd post it, i honestly loved these ones i am exploring a little bit for with certain genres and i must say it like a whole new world i'm enjoying it and i hope you like them too. remember too always show lots of love and support to these amazing writers they dedicated so much time to writing these fics and they are absolute geniuses and deserve the world for sharing them with us so please follow them and take a look at their masterlists cause i will 100% guarantee that you will find your very own favourites there as well, leave the a little comment i know they will appreciate it so much and send them all the love in the world... i will reblog these through out the week and as usual minors do not interact i will block those who do.... happy reading everyone see you next week with taehyung's list and if you have anything you would like to share with me or you just wanna ramble about a fic you loved my asks are always open i love hearing from you🖤✨

a- angst s- smut f- fluff

series

stalemate by @shina913 f s a

↬"The truth is, I'm not afraid to take that gamble anymore...in the off-chance that I get lucky again and feel the way I felt when I was with you. I'd happily make that bet over and over."

oh, my darling by @yoongiofmine f s a

↬ starting your second semester at one of South Korea’s most prestigious universities should be stressful enough. Between juggling classes, good grades and a social life, your plate was full. Hoping to spice up your academic career, you thought it was a good idea to enroll as an assistant for your literature professor, whom you've held a very secret and very forbidden crush on for the past several months. What will happen now that you’re forced to work closely together? And what if your crush isn’t as one sided as you thought?

little bit of your heart by @/yoongiofmine f s a ft. jjk

↬You had everything you could ever dream of; the career of your dreams as a music producer, the best friends you could ever wish for, and a exes-turned-friends-turned-fuck-buddies relationship with Min Yoongi. You knew you and Yoongi would never move past that and you were okay with it. Until a friend from your past comes back into your life, offering to give you everything you deserve, everything Yoongi couldn’t. Will Jungkook show you what you’ve been missing? Or will the new guy threaten Yoongi enough to do something about it? 

sinful lust by @oddinary4bts s a ft. jjk

↬ in an attempt to spice up your bedroom life with your boyfriend Min Yoongi, you suggest bringing another man into the action. Yoongi seems reluctant at first, but when you mention his friend Jeon Jungkook, he can’t deny his attraction. All that’s left to do is to convince Jungkook into participating...

after hours by @archivedkookie f s a

↬ staying after hours with Yoongi for months proves to be a mistake when your heart falls for him.

Vows by @hamsterclaw f s a

↬ You're five years into your arranged marriage with Min Yoongi, and he's never once retaliated for anything you've done to him. One day you realise you've lost your appetite for provoking him, and you set about trying to win his heart instead.

sutures by @farfromsugafanfic f s a

↬ There was only one thing you and Min Yoongi had in common that night. You were both brokenhearted. You only intended to be together for one night, but when you both end up in the hospital the next day you discover that you are soulmates. It could kill you to be apart. As you and Yoongi attempt to sever the bond between you, will another be formed?

and so it goes by @prodagustd f s a

↬ You and Yoongi have been hooking up, having dates and spending most of the week together for almost seven months. He was comfortable without a title, until the last two weeks, when you couldn't see him because of your busy schedule, Yoongi can't understand why he misses you so bad if your relationship is just sex to him. Or maybe he does, but he's too much of a coward to admit it.

collateral by @theharrowing f s a ft. jjk & knj

↬ Your ex-boyfriend gets in over his head working for the local mafia, and Boss Min has come to collect his payment: You.

till death do us part by @colormepurplex2 s a

↬ Marital bliss isn't always a guarantee, especially when you find yourself marrying into the family responsible for your own family's demise. Sometimes, marriage is just a game of kill or be killed. Even when there is love involved, bullets still hurt.

grey area by @blushoseoks s a ft. jhs

↬ you spent the days staring at your wrist and tracing the skin where your soulmate’s name would one day appear. the nights were for telling your wrist about your day, as if the person whose name would one day stain itself there, like red wine to a dress, could possibly hear you. for years you thought up countless scenarios, imagined numerous possibilities, formulated conversations and rehearsed them over and over, until your mouth ran dry. outcomes and conclusions performed in your head on a repetitive loop. but out of everything you thought up, out of all of the time spent towards thinking about your soulmate, about what could possibly occur, none of it could ever prepare you for what would actually end up being. none of it ever came close to the way it happened when you finally met him. and now, after it’s all been said and done, you were left asking yourself one thing, and one thing only: “was it really worth all of this in the end?”

isn't it romantic by @jeonqkooks f s a

↬ Many things in life have a polar opposite: left and right, night and day, yin and yang, you and Min Yoongi... Hopeless romantic meets gloomy cynic. The only thing you seem to share is a magazine column but even then, you still can’t seem to understand how Yoongi can be called ‘The Love Doctor’ when he is the antithesis of everything love represents.

Flux by @yoonia f s a ft. jjk

↬ One of them is your longtime secret crush, while the other is the man with whom you had shared many heated nights filled with lust and forbidden desire, forever kept as your biggest secret of all time. You had sworn that those sinful nights would end, and that your secret crush would remain a secret. (poly au)

mean yoongi by @jjkpls f s

↬ Min Yoongi asks you to take care of his plants when he’s gone. It doesn’t go as planned and well, he has to deal with your misbehaving ass.

pretend by @gimmesumsuga s a

↬ “You know what they say: the best way to get over someone is to get under someone else, right?” idol au infidelity

naughty little kitten by @jungkooksxo s a ft ksj

↬ Jin figures out that you’re super into the idea of Yoongi listening in on you two having sex. Yoongi is super into listening to you and Jin having sex. Jin invites Yoongi to come play with his naughty little kitten.

babydoll by @jungcock s a

↬ Your childhood crush, now famous and successful, comes to visit you while you’re drunk and have a lot to prove.

eleven months by @bratkook f s a

↬ it’s been years of yoongi living his routine life, accustomed to his pace of living, going with the flow and simply existing. until you come along. yoongi absolutely can not see the logic in the way you live, but he weirdly craves it. craves the feeling of not being afraid of not knowing what's coming, being able to just let the cards fall wherever they land. and maybe you can help with that.

pause by @whatifyoulivelikethat s a

↬ Life is like a cassette tape. It seems like it’s constantly repeating, flipped from side A to side B, and the songs can’t be skipped. You can only pause, rewind, fast forward, play after you’ve already heard the song. After you’ve already lived it. All Min Yoongi knows is his own tape, until it smashes right at his feet, and then he has to learn to dance to a different beat.

darksided by @eoieopda f s a

↬ It all started with a bad joke and a bottle of Tanqueray.

three squeezes by @nomnomsik s a ft jhs

↬ Yoongi is notorious for his grumpy and emotionless behavior as director of an upcoming company. Yet, it’s a mystery to everyone how manager Hoseok always seems to soften him up. The truth is that the two are actually engaged. Unknown to this fact, you happen to take an interest in Hoseok… and he does too. 

one-shot

bad decisions by @jjungkookislife f s

↬ Jimin is desperate to get his apartment back to himself. He’ll move hell and earth, and even drop to his knees to beg you to take his brother, Yoongi, out of his hands. Who are you to say no to that pretty face and sinister grin?  

breakfast in bed by @joonbird f s

↬ “Min Yoongi, a grumpy Ikea employee, is wondering who you are and why exactly you’re sleeping in the display bed at his Ikea.”

Tricks of the Trade by @stutterfly f s a

↬ The convenience store across the street from your apartment carries your favorite energy drink. That's why you frequent it. It's definitely not because you have a big fat crush on the owner you've been flirting with for the better part of a year. Of course your brand of flirting can also be misconstrued as bickering. When a strange man wanders into the store, he thinks you need a little nudge to embrace the strings connecting you. Next thing you know you're waking up in a body that definitely doesn't belong to you. You can't decide if it's the best or worst thing that's ever happened to you.

threads by @yoonia s a ft. knj

 ↬ Life is full of surprises, just like how people are full of secrets. Just when you had thought you have been lucky enough to have your life figured out, life decides to throw you a curve ball when you least expect it. And there is nothing you could do to avoid it, except to hope that you could hold your secrets as tightly as you possibly could before everything blows up into smithereens.

under the willow tree by @orchidyoonkook f a

↬ The town outcast shows up in the one place you find solace from it’s residents. The people you force yourself to fit in with, even though you never want to be anything like them. Will he ruin your only place of salvation, or become the most unlikely friend?

mami by kithtaehyung s ft. knj

↬ you somehow have a conversation with yoongi, and you tell your roommate about a date date.

the devil wears valentino by @orchidyoonkook f s a

↬ Having known him for years—from a small mistake on your behalf, and a favour on his—you’re one of the only people he seems to be able to put up with for company. Certainly the only one he’s half-way decent with. But what’s more surprising to you is that despite his name, reputation, and the fact he’s always joked he’d have killed anyone else by this point, is that he’s never once tried to cause you harm. 

angel by @sailoryooons f s

↬ Yoongi never meant to keep coming back. You never meant to become Yoongi’s favorite. Being Min Yoongi’s favorite has dire consequences

a boy like you by @cinnaminsvga f

↬ for whenever you are feeling low, always remember that there is a boy you know who would lift the sky for you. {or alternatively: Min Yoongi loves you, though he never says it. He’s always been a firm believer in that actions speak louder than any words ever could.}

last nite by @tayegi s a

↬ This is a zombie apocalypse AU based on The Walking Dead, The Stand, World War Z, and elements of Attack of Titan

zombie bites by @luffles424 f s a

↬ Your friends have always been willing to assist you when you need a model to practice makeup on. And with the upcoming zombie film on campus is no difference. But something feels different this time, can a zombie movie be more than just a zombie movie? 

heaven's winter by @jksangelic f s a

↬ your duty as the village daughter places you in line for the season’s Offering; a tradition not to tread lightly upon. as the snow falls slow and heavy, and the seraph awaits in the shallows of the mountain, you fail to realize what the winter has in store for you.

heavy sugar by @kinktae s

↬ The Roaring Twenties were a time of great economic wealth and social change. But beneath the jazz music and colorful speakeasies were mafia led organized crimes and bloodstained cash. You knew this well, but try as you might, you just couldn’t ignore the dark and enigmatic gangster whose eyes lingered on you from across the room.

all that holly, jolly shit by @daechwitatamic f s

↬You haven’t seen or heard from Yoongi since he broke your heart five years ago, laying out a logical list of reasons why you were better off breaking up. When a Christmas Eve blizzard traps you together for the night, you have no choice but to examine how few of those reasons are still true. And if they’re not… where does that leave you?

calling the shots by @chans-room f

↬ College basketball captain Yoongi

until death by @kpopfanfictrash s a

↬ Jade has always shaped the island of Kekon. Mined from the mountains, it enhances the abilities of Green Bone warriors who wear it and allows them protection from outside harm. No one understands these threats better than you do, second-in-command of the mighty No Peak clan.  When a new danger appears, seeming to come from within, everything you once took for granted is called into question. Including the bonds you’ve made, some more dangerous than the others. None more so than Min Yoongi, head of No Peak and the only one capable of destroying your heart.

whatta catch by @aredheadedmess f a

↬ One, two, three strikes you’re out. When opposing opinions find you roughing it up with the university’s star pitcher, he makes it his mission to show that you’re wrong about college sports—and maybe your feelings about the player himself.

shatter me, embrace me by @95rkives s

↬you longed for him, yearning for love, yet all that awaited you was heartbreak.

you're losing me by @/archivedkookie a

↬ ❝ He’s losing you, and yet, he lets the flower die in front of his eyes instead of doing everything to save it. Alternatively, Yoongi and you are losing your love toward each other. ❞

spotlight by @back2bluesidex f a

↬ No matter how much you run away from Yoongi, Yoongi always comes right back to you.

all the wrong places by @mrworldwideshoulders f a

↬ After getting separated from your friends during a night out, you get stuck with a hefty bill – one that you can’t pay. So when a handsome, emotionless stranger covers your tab in a random act of kindness, you’re determined to track him down and pay him back. inspired by 24K Magic by Bruno Mars.

now we reign by @/oddinary4bts f s a

↬ when working on a collab together makes you and Min Yoongi seek comfort with the other, you discover there’s more to life than loneliness. Only, hurdles mark your path in Min Yoongi’s life, and it’s unclear what the outcome will be. Will you be destroyed by him and his world, or will you learn to reign over it, together with him?

stay by sugarwithtea f s a

↬ what happens when you get stranded in a remote town with no place to live except for a lodge owned by a dangerously handsome but annoying man? yeah, a lot.

when the stars align by @itskimtaehyung f

↬ With cuffing season approaching its end, you thought you had escaped the pressures of finding a boyfriend for the holidays. That is, until your friends set you up on a blind date that goes horribly wrong. This prompts you to enlist the help of your roommate, Yoongi, to fake a relationship so your friends will stop meddling in your love life. And it turns out Yoongi is a lot better at this romance thing than you originally thought...

egotstic by @pasteljeon s a ft. knj

↬ The timing was never right. He loved you when you were kids, knees scraped and cheeks red. You loved him when pimples bloomed across his skin, voice cracking and he found solace in the scribbled lines in his notebook. The stars never seemed to align for the two of you, but perhaps it was because you were meant for someone else.

on the court by @centerhaechan f

↬ As captain of your school's winning women's basketball team, it is only understood that you despise the men's basketball team and their captain. Your main rival, Min Yoongi, enjoys testing your patience while he attempts to lead his own team to a championship victory. Your coaches believe you both have problems with teamwork, and insist that working together will produce a promising solution.

sugar by @zehakoo f s

↬ desperately in need of sugar to make coffee in order to ease down your headache, you find yourself knocking on a strangers door who happens to be your best friend’s friend and the finest man you’ve ever encountered.

from the ashes by @fortunexkookie s a

↬ Someone is sobbing ugly, wrecked sounds that shatter the silence in the room. You need them to stop; it’s distracting and you need to focus. You need to clean the ash from his skin. You need to comb the knots from his hair. You need to dress his beautiful body in something befitting the king you know he is… but the sobbing is too loud, and your vision is blurry. It takes Yoongi wiping your tears away for you to realize that the gasping cries echoing off the stone are coming from you.

the dark by @/bratkook s

↬ your small town thrives on the occult, luring tourists in with endless themed festivities, but the only place you’re determined to see is the mysterious club that comes to life the week before Halloween. what makes The Dark so exclusive, and what secrets are they hiding behind closed doors?

Triplicity by @kainks ft. jhs

↬ Distance is a cruel thing, and when you find yourself going astray, they are there to help remind you of just where exactly you belong.

fermata by @jeongi f s

↬ fer·ma·ta: from fermare, it means to stay or to stop. min yoongi teaches you exactly how to let go.

private lessons by @dntaewithluv f s

↬ Your little sister finds it odd how you’ve been taking private lessons from her piano teacher for over a month now, but she hasn’t heard you actually play even once…

first love by @geniuslab f s a

↬You learn a lot of new things in your first year of university, including what it feels like to fall in love.

↬looking for other myg fics or the other bts members check out my library

[gingiesworld]

Hey

I wanted to ask i you can write some thing about fem reader who can shift into an huge wolf and natasha who finds out. Mary something fluffy with a bit Angst :)

Btw i love your storys, your a really good writer

Secrets (Drabble)

Natasha Romanoff x Werewolf Fem Reader/ Wanda Maximoff x Reader (Platonic)

Warnings: Angst and fluff

A/N: Thank you nonnie for this request and your sweet words <3

18+ MINORS DNI

Natasha thought she knew everything about Y/N from the moment they had become official. Although Y/N had a secret that only Wanda knew about, especially as the two have a history with Hydra. Although Wanda had volunteered thinking she was doing it to save her country, Y/N was captured because of her bloodline.

Wanda was in control of being her keeper, she helped with calming her down whenever she felt overwhelmed or like she was going to lose control. But the friendship between the two didn't go unnoticed by the assassin. Jealousy had sparked something from within and she found herself questioning her relationship with Y/N.

"Do you want a fresh drink?" Y/N asked her at one of Tony's parties.

"Please." Nat smiled at her as Y/N took her glass and headed to the kitchen. Smiling as she got the drinks but soon as she spotted Steve sitting a little too close to Natasha, she felt anger and rage as Nat looked uncomfortable.

"Just a moment Vis." Wanda told him as she noticed Y/N's stare, heading straight for her best friend and dragging her outside the compound. "Just breathe Y/N." Wanda tried as Y/N paced.

"I just." She tried to speak but her breathing increased. It was Vision who had went to ask Natasha to follow him since they both had a plan to catch the two in the act. But what they never realised was that it was the complete opposite to how they thought.

"Y/N." Wanda spoke in a soothing voice, Y/N shook her head no as her body started to change. Her screams filled the air as the bones broke as they changed form. Once Y/N had fully changed, Vision went into protective mode and flew over to tackle Y/N away from Wanda. "VISION!!" She yelled as she used her powers to stop his movements.

Nat slowly approached the the three of them with caution.

"She is dangerous Wanda." He told her as Wanda shook her head no.

"She has nevet hurt me in all of the years we have known each other." Wanda told him through gritted teeth as she went to check on Y/N, running her hands through Y/N's hair as she whimpered.

"What is going on?" Nat questioned as she watched both Wanda and Y/N in her wolf form.

"She is from a long line of werewolves and she was taken by Hydra." Wanda told her. "Hydra had her kill someone in order to activate the curse and ever since I have been their for her."

"I just." Nat looked at Y/N's whimpering form.

"Y/N had never cheated on you." Wanda stated. "Sorry, it's just that your thoughts are very loud and I couldn't control it." Nat just nodded as she gazed at the grey wolf. "Y/N loves you so much Natasha and she comes to me when she fears she can't control herself. She is afraid of hurting you so she kept this secret from you."

"She's hurt." Nat stated as she noticed the blood on her fur.

"She will heal." Wanda told her. "There is a lot that comes with this knowledge Natasha and Y/N needs you to be impartial."

"I love her Wanda and I will not go anywhere." Natasha spoke firmly as she knelt beside Y/N. "This secret won't come between us." Wanda smiled as she watched the assassin started to stroke Y/N's fur. "I don't care that she turns into a wolf, all I care about is her health and happiness."

"I love you too Natasha." Y/N whispered as they soon noticed Y/N had changed back, Wanda was fast to give her the hoodie she had on to cover her bare form. "And I am sorry that I felt as though I couldn't trust you with this."

"That's ok." She whispered as she brushed Y/N's hair from her face. "Let's get you inside and we can have a bath and watch a movie."

"I would love that." Y/N kissed her softly as Wanda cleared her throat.

"Well, I guess I best get Vision in line before he gets everyone to turn on Y/N." Wanda told the two as she soon disappeared, leaving the two lovers under the stars as Nat pulled her back in for a loving kiss.

[humbledragon669]

S1E1 – In The Beginning Write Up P3

– Five Years Later (allegedly) and The Present Day

Alright so let’s address the elephant in the room here shall we? The signpost tells us, in no uncertain terms, that the story line has moved on by five years. I have a serious issue with that assertion, and it’s not just because this is in direct contradiction to the storyline in the book. It goes a little something like this:

I cannot believe that Aziraphale and Crowley have left the Antichrist alone for the first five years of his life.

Even if we’re generous here and say that Crowley steps in to replace a nanny that has been present for Warlock’s early years, it simply doesn’t make any sense that they would have sat back and let him develop on his merry way for the most influential years of his life (sorry Neil, but I will die on this hill). The book’s timeline here makes a lot more sense – that both Aziraphale and Crowley are inserted into Warlock’s life within a week of his birth, Aziraphale as the gardener and Crowley as the nanny. At the age of five, they both leave and return immediately as tutors for him, ensuring that they are both present for his entire childhood. With that in mind, I’m going to do something potentially controversial and adopt the book timeline as fact. It just makes more sense. Also that will make my fanfic ideas not only possible but genuinely really feasible. Honestly, I don’t know why the timeline deviates from the book here – this matter aside, the series is a truly excellent adaptation of the book (judged by the fact that I never said “that’s not how it happened in the book” for the whole of series 1. There are a lot of media writers that could learn a lot from Neil on this point – I’m looking at you Discovery of Witches series 2 creative team).

There are two things I find interesting about the short scene that follows (no, one of them is not how well David carries off a skirt, though I do really appreciate the Mary Poppins reference with that costume). Firstly, the positioning of Aziraphale as a gardener. I suppose we shouldn’t be surprised that the idea of a garden is brought up again, but I can’t quite make the connection myself. Perhaps there isn’t meant to be one. That said, I would have thought, given his character, Aziraphale might have been more suitable as something like a butler (it would even give him the opportunity to steal food!), which would likely give him more opportunity to interact with Warlock throughout his childhood, so I do feel like there’s something here.

On a tangential (and impossible-to-be-related) note, I saw Nye a few days ago (a play about the founder of the NHS, starring Michael, for those who don’t know what this is) and there was a line in it about Nye and his wife believing their love to be like a garden – he planted the love and she tended to it. It was truly beautiful and touching. I felt like I had a sort of light bulb moment about gardens in GO and then realised that the two productions have nothing to do with one another!

The second thing I noted about this sequence is more something of note than something that has meaning. Having discussed the music/soundtrack for this series in a previous write up, it should come as no surprise that there is a cute little parallel here: the melody Crowley uses for the lullaby he sings to Warlock is the same as the melody for the second motif in the theme tune. It’s slowed down quite considerably, but still recognisable.

Original theme:

Lullaby:

I have to say, I’m a little disappointed we don’t get to hear the rendition of “Three Little Pigs” that we’re treated to in the book. I am not ashamed to say that I laughed very long and very hard when I read it – I have a pretty dark sense of humour. Perhaps this was a little too much for the good ol’ BBC?

Quick item of note from the next scene at Heaven/Hell HQ – this series has escalators instead of an elevator. I had originally assumed that this was the same building as we see being used in series 2 to gain access to Heaven but looking at the background when Crowley and Aziraphale enter the building, it’s clear that it’s a completely different building, which just makes me wonder where exactly the HQ entrance is. There’s a really clever piece of editing at use here too, one which I actually didn’t spot until I was doing this write up.

I hadn’t noticed previously that the duplicate image of the escalator on the floor of the lobby ISN’T a reflection of the physical escalators. On the left, we can see Crowley’s image on a set of escalators going down, whilst we see no reflection of Aziraphale. We even get to see Crowley approach the escalator in the “reflection” after he disappears through the floor, whilst Aziraphale’s reflection disappears from the floor as he approaches the stairs, and both of these things happen as they walk across an area that ripples like water under their feet. I don’t think there’s any hidden meaning in this, I just think it’s a really cool piece of film.

When we see the angel and demon giving their reports to their respective head offices, it’s made clear to us that neither authority has any awareness of their collaboration. In fact, Aziraphale is still held in high esteem by Gabriel and Michael (though perhaps not Uriel and Sandalphon – those two always look like someone just pissed on their nice suits) and is even given permission to continue on his apparently futile mission. Unfortunately, the same cannot be said of Crowley, but as Liggur said earlier in the episode, it would be a funny thing if demons could trust one another anyway.

It’s nice to see that Heaven isn’t so busy that it can’t produce a newspaper for its earthbound agents, complete with weak headlines, worthy of any local rag:

I do not think it a coincidence that the newspaper has been given the title of “Observer” – after all, it’s pretty much all they do up there isn’t it? Watch people? Other than planning Armageddon I mean…

The short scene on the bus also shows us a little more of the dynamic between Crowley and Aziraphale when it comes to planning. It’s clear that the angel is relying on the demon to lead the way and he looks really worried when it’s made apparent that Crowley doesn’t have a plan for a potential emergency situation.

Quick note about the Hell Hound – he’s being housed in a room with a number on it – 2549. Does this mean there have been 2548 Hell Hounds before him? Hastur certainly indicates that he isn’t the only Hell Hound they have (but he is the biggest). Where are the rest of them?

The conversation (which takes place in the grounds of Crystal Palace Dinosaur Park - the repeated reference to dinosaurs being a big joke in this scene is not lost on me) on the park bench is the first time we hear Crowley call Aziraphale by the name “Angel”. Neil has confirmed (here and here) that this isn’t anything other than a factual name to use but I can’t help but feel like it’s affectionate. It’s certainly very familiar and it’s interesting to see that Aziraphale doesn’t repay the favour; perhaps this is to do with the meaning of the words – after all, calling someone “demon” doesn’t feel very polite, does it? Or perhaps it’s just that “Aziraphale” is a bit of a mouthful to say. This is also the first time we are let in to the secret of them having their own side:

AZIRAPHALE: And if he does name it? CROWLEY: Then you and I have lost.

The conversation around the potential murder of an 11-year-old boy presents an interesting side of the relationship between the pair. I don’t think I’m alone in thinking that the suggestion that Aziraphale is capable of killing an innocent child (even if he is the Antichrist) is nothing short of laughable, and Crowley would know this. This suggestion is shared with a rare occurrence of Crowley communicating “secretly” with Aziraphale where the angel doesn’t get the message, and the irony is that Crowley isn’t even being that subtle about it. There’s no doubt that Aziraphale really doesn’t get the drift though:

It’s painful to watch Aziraphale’s thought process here. He knows that Crowley’s logic actually makes sense but he can’t tally that with his own moral compass – it’s a struggle that I think the vast majority of us would go through if put in the same position. Sadly, it’s not like Crowley has much other choice than to suggest Aziraphale does the deed – if he were to do it himself, the repercussions for him would be unthinkable. It’s clear that this is the first time he has raised this idea in the eleven years they’ve been doing this job together and he can’t even say it without his voice breaking (see “one life against the universe”), and once it’s clear that Aziraphale isn’t open to the idea he doesn’t push him or lose his temper. He watches Aziraphale carefully for the whole exchange, without changing his expression, which I take to mean he’s watching for any signs that he’s pushing him too far.  All of this tells me he’s only done it because they’re getting desperate.

Alright, it’s time to move on to the little “magic” routine. I find this whole sequence adorable - can we say 1941 vibes? I do find it interesting just how quickly Aziraphale’s mood changes with the idea of him being able to perform some magic again – he’s gone from the contemplation of the ethics of an actual trolley problem (see here if you don’t know what that is) to a smiling, bubbly angel complaining that his companion is “no fun” in mere seconds. For someone who lives their life in eons of centuries instead of years or decades, he’s a remarkably fickle being! It’s pretty blurry in this shot, but just look how happy this angel is:

The hidden communication thread is resumed at normal operation here as Crowley knows exactly what Aziraphale means when he says he could “entertain” – he knows exactly what he means by this and is not amused by the implications.

I also find Crowley’s use of the word “demeaning” an interesting choice here. Usually we might say embarrassing; in fact the dictionary definition of demeaning is to lower the character of somebody, or to make them feel less respected. Whilst I can fully understand why Crowley might be embarrassed by Aziraphale’s pathetic attempts at illusionary magic, I am less clear on why he would find it demeaning. UNLESS. Unless my suppositions about the state of their relationship are correct, in which case they would have already been together (romantically) for almost eleven years at this point. Then it makes a weird sort of sense.

The comic little squabble that follows also makes perfect sense in this context. This couple are in no mood to compromise on this matter; Aziraphale will not be told that he’s a shit magician because he has too much fun doing it (this despite the fact that we know he and Crowley agreed he shouldn’t do magic anymore, but unlike in 1941, there’s no risk of anybody getting hurt if he drops a coin on the floor) and Crowley will not concede that he’s being a killjoy (which goes quite against his character). The spat concludes with Crowley delivering a passive-aggressive threat to Aziraphale, which you can see he instantly reconsiders with a head tilt - probably wise considering how unimpressed the angel is with it.

Side note: the watch that Crowley is wearing (seen at Warlock’s birthday party) appears to be a Devon Tread 1 A, coming in at a cool 18.5K (dollars). The book does make mention of his watch being fucking fashionably expensive but it was custom made for him, with an extra time zone for “Another Place” where the time is always “Too Late”.

Another side note: how many dens did you make as a child? A fair few I’d bet if you were anything like me. Did they ever look as cool as the one that The Them has? Me neither. I mean, just look at all those guns and skeletons used for decoration:

Once we’re back at the book shop, I find it interesting that Aziraphale is intending to imbibe (we don’t actually see him drink any of it) whatever spirit he’s given to Crowley. I’ve no doubt it’s good quality, it’s just unusual to see him drinking hard liquor – perhaps this is simply due to the seriousness of the situation he finds himself in. Their conversation about lying in memos to head office also suggests that Crowley might not be the only one lying to his bosses:

CROWLEY: Everyone stretches the truth a bit in memos to head office, you know that.

Is it me, or is there a sense of “I told you so” to Aziraphale’s lack of sympathy towards Crowley’s despair? Some might say it’s reminiscent of the way a stereotypical nagging wife speaks to their long-suffering husband when he’s done something wrong…

In amongst the dark threat of impending Armageddon, we’re still treated to a little comedy (and perhaps another Clue as to the current status of the relationship between the angel and demon). Crowley’s snappy, and ill-considered, outburst in response to Aziraphale’s almost apologetic confession that he’s wearing a new cologne is well worth a word or two. Let’s say for a second that this pair are not romantically involved at this point in time – is it not a bit strange to think that the person you’re with knows you so well that they would detect that you’re wearing a different perfume than usual? I would think you’d have to be spending a LOT of time in VERY close proximity to that person for that piece of information to be anywhere near their radar. And what’s with the angel’s apologetic tone? Why would you feel the need to be sorry about trying out a new cologne? Aziraphale doesn’t look particularly shocked when Crowley announces that he knows what he smells like, and Crowley’s tone and facial expression suggests he thinks this piece of knowledge is a pretty obvious one.

Here’s my last observation for this episode. Check out just how earnest Crowley is in this delivery:

Despite Aziraphale’s response that he thinks he obviously would, I don’t really feel like he believes this stance, and he’d do anything not to believe that what Crowley is saying is true.

And so concludes the first episode! If you’ve made it this far through my write-up(s) so far, I commend and thank you. I’ll start work on the next episode over the next few days, but in the meantime I’ll also write a master post that I’ll add to as I go along. As always, comments, questions, discussions and any other engagements are welcome.

[sabine-smitten-obviously]

And now i want to find myself a haunted cottage ... to find the love of my life ❤️

I just started this wonderfull gem yesterday and finished this morning. And i am so reluctant to part with it that i even consider to reread it immediately.

So if you are into Good Omens, like Human AU and searching for a kind of different plot - here are my thoughts on a wonderful fanfic from @commodorecliche !

😃 Whats it about?

Aziraphale buys a little cottage and finds some books in it, written by A.J. Crowley. Oh - and there is a ghost in the house! You will never guess who that might be ... But what might sound cheesy really is not. I so loved the authors notes that i will throw them in here:

This is a ghost story. This is a story about the remnants of ourselves we leave behind. This is a story about life and about all the things that cannot be hidden, even after we die. This is a story about finding comfort in another creature, despite the dimensional divide that might stand between us. This is a ghost story. This is a love story.

And that it is. The notes say it all!

{There are minor spoilers ahead - i tried to collect my thoughts without giving too much away, but pls only go on if you are ok with that! }

What i absolutely adore in this wunderful piece:

🤍It is a tale of love told from Aziraphale´s point of view only. Being a ghost story i had goose bumps several times during the first chapters. Nothing too scary, but quite exciting! It also has a bit of angst in it, but mostly it is deeply loving and what hurts is the fact that - well - Crowley is a ghost and Aziraphale is human. There is a natural limit to their connection. I dont want to tell more because i dont want to spoil the story. You should definitely mind the tags before you start reading!

❤️ It is a human AU but takes on a very different plot with Crowley being a ghost. So somehow this is so far unique to me in the GO-universe, where most human AU tend to put them both in the same place - be it rockstars, book sellers, teachers and parents and so on.

🤍Having a ghost and a human falling in love with each other - oh it is so sweet but also ... tragic? Having someone to love without being ever able to touch him? To barely feel him? Crowley is so well written, he is merely an essence - there and at the same time not.

🩶What i really enjoyed is that you will know every character but most of the stereotypes are left out. Anathema is not psychic (or at least it isnt mentionned) for example. There is no bickering between Aziraphale and Crowley. No sentences or dialogues from GO thrown back to the reader. Still everything blends together so well.

🖤 Oh and i loved this fact: Crowley is a writer! Crowley is the one with the words !!! and for once there is no stumbling, no "ngk", no "fuck" no nothing. Most of human AU leave Crowley with "clever hands" but words not so fluently ... (A fact that kind of surprises me often because i am not so sure every Shakespearean Text is really Shakespeare ... right? ;-))

❤️Aziraphale is happy with his body - this is something i deeply appreciate. I have read roundabout 60 fanfics so far and in most human AU his thoughts about himself can be rather derogatory.

🖤Crowley is not the one begging Aziraphale to stay or be together with him - also a quite common theme in GO-fanfics. I absolutely love that!!

I kind of realise now that me writing reviews is my way of parting with a story that particularly got to my heart. This one is truly beautiful for several reasons and i had everything from goosebumps to laughter to angst to heartache to relief to sadness. It ends well, if it is happy is really only your choice. ❤️

This story made me finally set up a "re-read-list" and i absolutely recommend it, if you´re in for a bit of heartache, a different plot and a different version of a "and they life happy ever after". It is a quiet, lovable and aching book, well balanced and still easy to read.

ps: I thought a lot about it, could i do it? Could i fall in love with a ghost? I would like to think of myself as having stayed in the house but probably i would have run. If i had come past this first angst and built a connection - would i have been able to? Would it have been enough to simply love? To have an ethereal connection and know you are not alone but ... no friends to share with, to be grounded to the house, no picnics, no touch? What are your thoughts on this?

pps: if you have read this one, pls come here and scream and cry with me in the comments!!! I dont want to tell too much here but there are scenes in the book that i would love to romp on in the comments!!

[ask-squidbeaks-agents]

Staring at Four and Kay and rotating them in my mind

Got any 4K bits you haven't had a good chance to share yet that I could ask for?

They are one of *the* ships of all time

// Oh I mean they may be my own characters that I'm obsessed with but I wouldn't call them that... they're just my silly idiots lol- But I do! Mainly stuff I haven't had the chance to draw or write yet- I still find it a little crazy how much some people like these two- Anyway here's a ship chart I've done for them- I've done it for 3/8 and my idol ships but- not important rn lol

// Everything under here is going to be rambles cause I'm a loser who's obsessed with their own characters lol

// I haven't shown much of their dynamic outside Four teasing Kay but generally Kay's pretty normal around Four, he just gets flustered from her teasing and what not. In fact Kay also likes to kinda tease Four- in a very friend like way for instance holding something she wants above her head till she says please.

Kay and Four met about- 4 years prior to this blog or 2 years prior to Splat3, I am attempting to write out this first meeting so once it's done it'll be posted here and maybe on AO3 (however I'm a slow writer- might take... some time lol)

Four has saved Kay's butt on multiple occasions however there was one specific time where she full on saved him from getting shot, it was during this case- Kay had been lured out for getting too close to solving it, Four had tailed him and from the shadows using a charger prevented the assailant from shooting Kay. While there are many reasons he loves Four this was the moment he realised.

The moment Four realised she loved Kay- he was helping her with a mission, and while Four jumped over the fence no problem, Kay's suspenders (that he doesn't wear properly) got caught on said fence causing him to fall and land himself upside down against the fence. Of course Four found it hilarious and it was just this kind of "Oh I love this idiot" moment.

The reason Four, who is much more confident in her feelings then Kay is, hasn't confessed is because 1. she finds him getting flustered cute. 2. she wants him to actually have the confidence in their relationship and 3. she won't admit it but she's actually scared of ruining their relationship- she worries that she isn't actually good enough (which is the same reason Kay won't confess, that and while he knows Four likes him as a friend he doesn't think her feelings are actually anymore than that)

The pair share a few interests, they have similar tastes in music- Four loves it when Kay shares his music, it might not always be her taste but it makes him happy so it makes her happy- they also both like video games- Four's more into RPG or action games akin to like Sonic or Persona whereas Kay is more into puzzles and horror like Resident Evil.

They understand and respect each others boundaries but ironically they are also the except to the rule like in Fours case- Four hates physical contact and others being in her personal space to which Kay then goes out of his way to not be too close to Four but Four actually likes being next to him but she also does very much appreciate the fact Kay understands that boundary.

OH- There's this one little story idea I had for them- something silly not really agent related- Four gets herself caught out in the rain, luckily she's slightly more water resistant but Kay runs into a very soaked Four. Obviously he's extremely worried for her despite her waving off his concerns but eventually he convinces her to at least get indoors and get dried. Four points out his place is closer and they should go there to which he reluctantly agrees. Once arriving Kay instructs Four to stay by the door while he grabs her a towel which he gently throws upon her head once returning. Four being Four then starts to a bit too roughly dry her head to which Kay promptly stops her- reminding her that she's still in very melty state and she'll hurt herself doing it like that. Kay points her to the bathroom where she can go dry herself and get changed (into one of his old t-shirt/shorts) Four complies and returns shortly after dried and with her soggy agent gear which she hands to Kay who throws it into the dryer. He says it wont take long but Four points out its really late, she might as well just- crash at his place for the night- she'll just sleep on his couch. Kay is- a bit taken a back at the suggestion but realises she's right by the time her gear will be dried it'll be super late. So he agrees, reluctantly, to which Four wastes no time in running to his living room and checking through all the games he has (cause she wants to play some) She finds that he's got a game she has been dying to play and begs him to let her try it, obviously he lets her (seeing her face when he agreed was- way too adorable for him) Kay sits and watches Four play for a bit before ending up asleep on the couch next to her, when Four realises this she turns off the game before just- leaning her head against his shoulder for a bit before falling sleep herself.

Kay definitely plays rank in his free time, he's tried to convince Four to join but every time she refuses- at first he thinks it's because she's too high a rank for him (He's like A-) but he learns it's actually because she too low a rank to join which major surprise considering the feats he's seen her do. When he finds out he actually offers to help teach her which she initially refuses, pointing out how her whole family are S/X rank and none of them have been able to teach her. Kay understands but does point out that he doesn't play like her family, they're strict and pro, taking rank very seriously where as he's just- a causal player and is much more loose about playing the games and that might be the approach she needs. Four is yet to actually agree to train with him (more out of embarrassment for herself) but she has started to consider taking up his offer.

[chaotic-orphan]

Found fictional story/novel

So... I have found a fictional novel that I wrote over the last ten years that I had completely forgotten about, and then, once I found it again, I realised there is so much of it - like 90,000 words much of it - and it is a lot to comb through and I kind of shut down mentally when I found it but I am working more now on updates for the WIPS I have on Tumblr!

So you can Expect updates soon in:

Delirious Villain x hero caretaker,

Heroic betrayal,

Intoxicating fear (updates every Saturday) (from now) :)

Vendetta,

and, A Benignant Mischief

which are all started in the drafts!

Updates continued under cut

(*not necessary* to read as it is mostly rambles and ranting about the novel I found (and others), but I want to share some fun revelations I found while skimming it)

There are some whumpy scenes from the novel that I may post as I find them, cause some of them are very whumpy, and I enjoyed reading them~

The plot has a lot of male characters which is both interesting and annoying— interesting because I love the two brothers dynamic, even not even blood related, like two brothers joined together by fate, blood, prophecy etc. Annoying because it’s obvious that I looked at the media I was surrounded with and was like “nobody wants to read about women, if they did, there would be more women centric things” so I’ll write about boys!

Point 2 Contd. (Rant!) Obviously discounting the genre of YA dystopian fiction which was great, and populated by mainly female protagonists, and which I enjoyed, but then, were shit on by the mainstream media because GIRLS CAN’T FIGHT? Girls can’t be the main driving force of a novel? Girls suck, boo girls, unless they’re tom boys or men. Ahem, thank you for your input on teenage girl’s book choices FORTY YEAR OLD WHITE MEN :D WHERE WOULD WE BE WITHOUT YOU

Part 2+3 contd. (the brightside!) However, the good thing about this is that I can populate the rest of the novel with strong female characters! There are a few dotted through who i dote on a bit, I love them, like come here my little beautiful minority <3

The plot centers around two brothers who get torn apart when outlaw's raid in their coastal village - actually, my newest Medieval WIP was inspired by the novel!! Same setting/vibe (as in the coastal village) so very fun

This to say that actually I think the new Medieval WIP is my brain trying to flesh the world out more and see what the average people would do in the world… but it’s a story in its own right too!

There are magic, gods, good gods and bad gods ofc, ancients, bloodlines, descendants, royalty, soldiers, outlaws, magic schools, political intrigue - like it is a mix of everything I have loved over the years which is so funny to see because clearly I haven't changed...

The dialogue?!?!? I don't think I have written like that ever, but the dialogue is so much better than the dialogue I write today and idk why? Maybe because I wrote it off a sudden throng of inspiration or something? But, fuck, how do I write like that again? I mean, without editing, because the amount of editing I had to do to make the novel READABLE wasn't funny, it took so long... it's finished now though, just the editing, NOTHING else - give me strength, I need it

Also, realised that I hate editing - is it something new? Not really, but holy moly... editing sucks, but it also?? Improves the story and fluidity so much, I should start editing my pieces before I publish and come off as far more eloquent than I do

Planning... is also so difficult - 90% of the novel is like this:

Scene X: completed Me: ah, good, that scene is written, I can move on to the next one Me, still staring at Scene X: ...move on now My brain: but what if it happened like this? PROVIDES SEVEN DIFFERENT ALTERNATE ENDINGS TO THE SCENE THAT WEREN'T NECESSARY AND NOW I HAVE TO CUT SO MUCH CRAP BUT MY BRAIN'S STILL LIKE - BUT WHAT IF?

My brain's literally like the writer's brain from Hush, such a good movie... ANYWAYS!!!!

That's the end of all my ramblings for today, was this post necessary? No, but like, I clearly wanted to get it off my chest and vent so we live, laugh, love... I hope all your days are going well :3

~ Orphan,

(P.S. - I'm toying with the idea of dropping my nickname in the bio, or doing a whole overhaul of the blog - the name, the layout... get rid of orphan, or maybe just become "nickname_the orphan", or something. But, see orphans are just so whumpy though I love a good orphan story... thoughts, ideas, waste management? I'm just dunking all my overflow of thoughts on this update today, but sure, look, be grand — I’m truly sorry if you read this far, I am having an ✨episode✨)

[singsweetmelodies]

Hello Katie 👋🏼👋🏼 :D

For the 50 romance prompts ask meme, I'll like to request for 44: soulmate AU: timers <3

but if possible... with a twist...? (you don't have to include a twist if it's too difficult to work it in!)

The twist being, for whatever reason, their countdown timers for each of them to the time they meet their soulmates doesn't match, so they think "we're not each other's soulmates. that's cool. (no it's not)" but it turns out that they're each other soulmates anyways. or they choose to be with each other in spite of not being each other's soulmates. idk. *nervous laughter*

hiiii charlotte 🥰 first off, i am SO sorry for the incredible delay with this answer!! i saw this prompt and i absolutely LOVED IT (and the twist!! 🙏 *chef's kiss*) but unfortunately i got struck with a horrible case of writer's block/work deadlines, and just couldn't get to it at all.

until yesterday: i decided to just open my inbox and see what came to me. no thinking, just following the vibe of a prompt and writing. and uh. this happened... not only did it get ridiculously long (oops?) but it also somehow became a mini "investigate montreal" fic?? so in that vein, i'm tagging @1016week and submitting a belated entry for Day 6 "Montreal"... ❤️

i love this one. hope you love it too!! 👀⌚

~

Charles' soulmate timer stops when he is seven years old, and he meets the boy with the bluest eyes he's ever seen.

He's been vibrating with excitement all weekend - not just because it's a karting cup, but because his soulmate timer has been ticking down to this day for months now. Well, not just months, not really. It's actually been his whole life, but Charles doesn't remember all of that. He only remembers the past few months, when the little numbers had been getting smaller and smaller, until there were only ten days left and Charles gasped when he realised that the day would fall on the same day as the Bridgestone Cup.

"Of course the girl I marry is going to like racing, too," he'd told Maman and Papa, confidingly. Not a lot about soulmates made much sense to him, but this did.

His Maman had tried to smile, and Charles had hugged her tight to let her know it was going to be okay. He would find his soulmate, and then everyone would be smiling, because that's what people do when you meet your soulmate.

(Later that night, when Charles had been too excited to sleep and he'd gone to the bathroom quickly, Charles had heard his parents having an argument in their room. The door was closed, so their voices were muffled, but Charles could still make out his Maman saying "I just don't think it's a good sign, to meet your soulmate so young!" But Papa had countered, "Many people do, and they have beautiful stories. You have to trust that our Charles will meet his perfect match tomorrow." And then there had been an icky noise, like kissing, and Charles had flushed the loo quickly and ran back to his room.)

Now, with the beautiful blue eyed boy standing in front of him, Charles thinks of Papa's words again. Our Charles will meet his perfect match tomorrow.

Charles thought it would be a girl who really liked karting, but this is even better. This is a boy who wins at karting, because he's holding a trophy in both hands and grinning like he couldn't be happier.

Of course Charles' perfect match would be someone who wins at karting. It's only right, because Charles also wins at karting.

Charles clears his throat. "Hi," he says shyly, and the blue-eyed boy jumps.

"Oh! Oh, I'm sorry, I didn't see you there," he says apologetically, and then he laughs. He has a nice laugh, Charles thinks - like he knows how to have fun. "You are a bit short," the blue-eyed boy adds, and hey.

"Hey," Charles protests. "I'm tall for my age. I'm seven."

"Well, I'm nine," the blue-eyed boy says, like that's the most impressive age in the world.

It is a bit impressive, but not very, because Lorenzo is much older than that. Still, it is a little scary - Charles is only seven. What if this blue-eyed boy doesn't like him because he's only seven? Older kids can be mean like that.

No, he is your perfect match, Charles reminds himself. This blue-eyed boy won't be mean to him, because that's not how perfect matches work.

Charles takes a deep breath, then he sticks out his hand. "I'm Charles," he says.

The blue-eyed boy takes his hand, and it feels... weird. A little bit like when you get shocked by static electricity.

Charles giggles, unable to stop himself, and the blue-eyed boy smiles, as though he likes that.

"Hello, Charles. I'm Pierre," he says, squeezing Charles' hand. His eyes widen a moment later. "Oh! You've met your soulmate?!"

Charles doesn't understand what he means. "Well, yeah," he says. "It's y-"

And then he notices it.

Pierre's soulmate timer, right there on his wrist, right above where Charles is gripping his hand - it's still ticking.

Now, Charles doesn't know a lot about soulmates yet, but he knows that that's not good. Not good at all.

"I, um," Charles stammers, and then he does the one thing Maman and Papa said you should never do to your soulmate. Charles lies.

"I met so many new people today. I don't remember who it was."

Pierre's face falls. "Oh," he says, and he sounds unbearably sad for Charles. "But..." He chews his lip, shaking his head with a deep frown.

Then, mid-shake, Pierre's expression changes to one of determination. "I will help you find them," he says, with the kind of confidence Charles can only dream of when he's not on the racetrack.

He tugs on Charles' hand - which he still hasn't let go of - and Charles is helpless to do anything but follow.

~

They don't find Charles' soulmate anywhere, of course, and then Charles has to go win his race - but Pierre makes him promise that they will find each other at the next French karting event, and Charles will tell him all about his soulmate.

Charles promises, even though the idea makes his stomach feel all funny. I shouldn't be lying to my soulmate, he thinks, guiltily.

But Pierre's soulmate timer didn't stop ticking, and... that's not how soulmates are supposed to work.

The moment he's in the car with his father after the race, heading back home, Charles asks him about it.

Papa is quiet for a long moment, then: "Are you sure there wasn't someone behind Pierre, Charles?" he asks, in his careful, kind way. "Someone who's timer stopped at the same time as yours?"

Charles thinks about it for a moment, but even the idea of that feels - wrong, somehow. Like going into a corner and knowing you braked too hard, and you're going to flip the kart.

He shakes his head decisively. "No," he says. "It's Pierre."

He hears rather than sees his father blow out a soft sigh. Charles catches his eye in the rearview mirror, feeling confused and a little shaky inside.

When Papa sighs like that, it's never good news - it's usually something about sponsorship, which is a word Charles is already coming to dread.

It doesn't make sense how this could be about sponsorship, though. It probably isn't.

Charles waits for his father to gather his thoughts, like he needs to do sometimes to make sure he says exactly what he means. (It's something Maman keeps telling him he should try doing as well, but he's not so good at that yet.)

"You know how even the greatest racing drivers make mistakes sometimes?" Papa asks.

Charles frowns, but he nods. "Yes?"

"Sometimes the universe is like that, too. Sometimes the universe makes a mistake, and stops the timers too soon," Papa explains.

Charles frowns. He hasn't heard about that before, but he guesses it makes sense. It's true what Papa said - not even Senna was a perfect driver who never made mistakes. It makes sense that the universe is the same.

"But this doesn't mean you don't have a soulmate, okay, Charles?" Papa says before Charles can spend too much time thinking about the whole thing. His voice is firmer than Charles was expecting, and he reaches up to tilt the rearview mirror to see Charles better.

"It doesn't mean you don't have a soulmate," he repeats, like he doesn't want Charles to ever doubt that. "It just means it's going to be a little harder to find them."

Charles frowns, and he can't help but be a little annoyed. Isn't the whole point of soulmate timers to make it easier to find your perfect match?

It's just his luck that his soulmate timer doesn't work properly.

"I understand," Charles says, though, because he can tell it's important to his father.

Papa nods, but he keeps watching Charles in the rearview mirror for the rest of the drive, like he sometimes does after a race where Charles crashed the kart badly and he needs to keep making sure that Charles is fine.

Of course Charles is fine. He doesn't think this is comparable to a bad race at all! It's a little annoying, yes, but it's not that bad. It's just a bit of extra work, isn't it?

Charles shrugs his shoulders, glancing quickly down at the stopped soulmate timer at his wrist.

Whatever. Racing is more important than soulmates, anyway.

~

Almost twenty years later, Charles still says that to himself almost every day, even if he doesn't believe it with nearly the same careless seven-year-old confidence anymore: racing is more important than soulmates.

It is, because it has to be.

The thing is this: his father's explanation to Charles' seven-year-old self had been true - if a little oversimplified, and painted with an overt layer of kindness.

The truth Charles knows now is that there are two reasons, two categories, for people whose timers stop when the other person's keeps running.

One is, like Papa had said all those years ago, a simple case of mistaken timing - cases where the universe or fate or whatever controls it all stopped one person's timer a little too soon, or the other's a little too late.

It's harder to find each other in those cases, but it's still quite possible.

And then there's the second category. The unrequiteds. People whose timers stopped at the right time - when they met the person who would be their perfect match - except that they are not that person's perfect match in return. It only goes one way.

It's rare, but it happens sometimes. No system is perfect, after all - not even a system of soulmates.

For years and years, Charles tried to convince himself that he fell into the first category. His soulmate timer simply stopped too early, by some cosmic accident - but it's okay, Charles insists to everyone who asks and to himself as well, because what it's done is given Charles more time to focus on his racing instead. He's not constantly glancing down at his wrist and wondering when his timer is going to stop ticking - he can just get on with the racing.

He'll find his soulmate eventually, but on his own terms. There's nothing bad about that, surely.

Charles believes that. Really he does.

Except.

Except, if it's true and Charles falls into the first category - the mistaken timing category - then it would mean Pierre isn't his soulmate.

Pierre, who kept the promise he'd made to a seven-year-old who wasn't even his soulmate (because, yes, he had found Charles at the very next French karting cup, and he'd asked to meet Charles' soulmate - and when Charles had to admit that he still hadn't found them, Pierre had hugged him and told him not to give up and that he would find his soulmate someday. Pierre had held Charles' hand and explained that his parents almost didn't find each other, but they did. So it might take Charles some time, but that was okay, because it had taken Pierre's parents some time too, but now they were happier than ever. He'd been so convincing, firm but kind and absolutely sure of himself, and he'd made Charles believe it. He also made Charles smile, genuinely and truly, when he promised he'd stick by Charles' side no matter what anyone else said or whispered about his stopped soulmate timer.)

Pierre, who kept that promise about sticking with Charles, too. Pierre who never stopped being kind, and loyal, and the best friend Charles could ask for, whether he was seven or thirteen or nineteen or twenty-six.

Honestly, how was Charles supposed to not fall hopelessly in love with him?

He tried to deny it. For years and years, Charles tried to deny it - I will find my soulmate someday and it will all make sense, he'd tried to convince himself - but the thing was, what made more sense than Pierre being his soulmate?

It was roundabout the time of Pierre's first win (when Charles was standing under the podium in Monza with an aching back but a heart soaring with joy for his best friend despite the disaster of his own race) that Charles resigned himself to the truth: Pierre is his soulmate.

He has to be. Isn't a soulmate meant to be your perfect match; the person who understands you better than anyone and makes you happier than any other person in the world?

There's nobody else who could make Charles as happy as Pierre does. Nobody, nobody. There's no point in even trying to deny it anymore.

Pierre is his soulmate. But he is not Pierre's.

And that's okay. It's okay.

It has to be.

~

It isn't okay, not really, but that's true of a lot of things in Charles' life, and he's learned how to deal with them. He can deal with this, too.

On the whole, Charles thinks he does a pretty good job of dealing with it. He gets to be Pierre's best friend, after all - isn't that just a different kind of soulmate? True, Charles might want more, but it isn't like he has nothing. He has Pierre, and he will have Pierre for the rest of their lives.

Not in the way he wants, but - at least he will have Pierre.

The one thing he tries never to think about is Pierre's actual soulmate. Because Pierre has one, he knows, and he will meet them at some point.

Charles doesn't know how the hell he's supposed to look at some soulmate of Pierre's, and smile at her, and not be hopelessly, heartbreakingly jealous.

(He will do it, though. He will learn to smile at Pierre's soulmate - for Pierre's sake. He'll do it for Pierre.)

But that's a bridge he will cross when they get there. He doesn't have to worry about it yet (or at least, that's what Charles keeps telling himself even as the months tick by, and he knows there aren't year figures left on Pierre's soulmate timer anymore. Just months now, and then... weeks.)

Charles isn't thinking about it. He's put it out of his mind completely - which is easy enough to do, thankfully, given everything that's been happening on-track this season.

That's probably why he accepts Pierre's invitation to dinner in Montreal without thinking twice about it. (Even if he had realised, though, Charles doesn't think he would have been able to say no, either. He would give Pierre everything, if he only asked.)

So they go to dinner in Montreal, and it's perfect, and wonderful, and laughter-filled, and all in all exactly what Charles needed to distract himself from the fact that he has yet another engine penalty, and the sinking feeling that the championship is beginning to slip out of his reach.

Pierre seems to realise it, because he's in even finer form than usual - teasing Charles and tickling his ribs playfully and making him laugh at every possible opportunity.

Even on the drive back to the hotel: they stop at a red light, and Pierre steals Charles' cap, and Charles is giggling and filming it while Pierre is giggling back, and he's pretty sure neither of them are thinking about it at all, until-

Until Pierre's face changes from laughter to something almost ashen. "Charles," he says, and for all the years Charles has known him, he's never once heard Pierre's voice like that. "My soulmate timer just stopped."

For a few seconds, the words don't even register in Charles' mind.

Then they do, and Charles can feel his heart drop. "What?" he breathes.

His hands shake, and he doesn't even register the fact that the light has gone green as he glances all around them, craning his neck to see if there's anyone behind the white Ferrari, or around to the side.

Just a few minutes ago, their car had been surrounded by fans on all sides, all jostling to try and get pictures of them. But now, somehow, they're all alone in the Montreal night.

(The irony of it all is not lost on him - is this how Pierre felt all those years ago, when he was trying to look for Charles' soulmate at a karting cup, but not finding anybody it could be?)

"Are you sure it stopped just now? And not earlier?" Charles asks, willing his voice not to shake.

"Yeah," Pierre whispers. He sounds... devastated.

"But," Charles says, and then he has to take a deep breath. "But there's no-one else here, Pierrot."

"I know," Pierre says, somehow even softer.

Charles' fingers clench reflexively around the steering wheel, and he's moving in blank autopilot as he puts the car into gear and starts driving forward again.

He doesn't even realise he's shaking his head until Pierre says softly, "Charles." There's something wounded about it.

Charles stops shaking his head and slams on the brakes instead, jerking the car into something he hopes is a parking space at the side of the road.

"I don't understand," he says, far more calmly than he feels. "You can't - I can't be your soulmate."

Okay, maybe he's not so calm after all. But he doesn't think... he doesn't think anyone would be calm, in this situation.

Pierre makes a sound that could almost be a laugh, except that it sounds too strangled. "Do you know," he says, "that I have spent half my life wondering if the soulmate system got something wrong in my case? Because if you're not my soulmate, then who is? Who could possibly..."

Pierre does laugh this time, shaking his head. "You know, I asked to go out with you tonight for a reason. I knew - I knew it would happen tonight, so I needed to..." He swallows. "I needed to see you, one last time. Before I wouldn't be allowed to love you anymore."

It jolts through Charles then, what Pierre is trying to say. "Pierre," he breathes, and now it's his turn to say his best friend's name in a way he doesn't think he's ever said it before.

But Pierre's not finished yet. "I thought I could have one last night with you," he says. "One last night, before I had to say goodbye to my feelings, and try to love someone else."

My feelings. Try to love someone else.

Charles Leclerc is a lot of things, but an idiot is not one of them. He knows what Pierre is saying. He's...

Pierre loves him too. All along, Pierre has loved him too.

Only, he never had the option of thinking we're soulmates, Charles realised, and his heart twists in his chest.

Because Charles, for all that he accepted his soulbond toward Pierre was unrequited - at least he'd had the option of them being soulmates. Yes, it was in a twisted way, but at least he'd had that.

Pierre didn't. And he still fell in love with Charles.

The thought hits him like a shell-shock, and it's enough that Charles can only sit there for a moment, staring blankly, as Pierre continues talking beside him.

"I meant for tonight to just be a quick dinner together, something fun but normal for us," Pierre is saying, wringing his hands. "But I lost track of time. I always lose time when I'm talking to you, Charlito, I could talk to you forever - but the point is, I forgot to tell you I need to go back. I forgot that I was meant to meet my fucking soulmate tonight, because I was spending time with you, and - "

He takes a deep breath, and then he laughs again, leaning forward to drop his head into his hands. "I felt it happen, you know? I knew exactly when my soulmate timer stopped, because I could feel it, and it's - it was when I put that fucking cap on my head, Charles."

The cap that he's still wearing. Charles' 16 Ferrari cap.

Charles' hands shake as he reaches out to touch it, just the brim. "Your soulmate timer stopped when you put my cap on," he says, because a part of him still can't believe that this is real, that he's not living in some kind of heartbreakingly wonderful dream.

Pierre straightens up so fast that Charles is left with his fingers dangling awkwardly in mid-air. "Yes," he says, suddenly looking wild, "but this doesn't have to change anything, Charlito, I promise. I will still help you find your soulmate, and I will - I'll learn how to live with an unrequited bond, it's -"

"No!" Charles interrupts, half-throwing himself across the car to catch hold of Pierre's hands. "No, no, no, no. No more unrequited bonds, Pierrot."

Pierre starts to shake his head, but then he stops in the middle of the movement. "What do you mean," he asks, very carefully, "no more?"

And suddenly, Charles feels giddy, of all things. "I mean, your timer didn't stop when mine did. So for years, I have thought that we can't be soulmates, or at least that you couldn't be my soulmate. But now your timer stopped when you put on my cap, so -"

"Stop, stop, stop," Pierre says, squeezing Charles' hands tightly. "What do you mean, my timer didn't stop when yours did?"

"Oh," Charles says, and then he winces, the weight of the only real lie he's ever told his best friend (the only real lie he's ever told his soulmate) settling onto his shoulders with uncomfortable heaviness. "Um. Well. Do you remember when we met, and you thought I already met my soulmate?"

"No," Pierre breathes, but it's not the kind of no that says "no I don't remember." This no is more like "no way."

"Yeah," Charles says, and he can't help but look down at his own wrist, where the soulmate timer has been stopped for years and years. "My timer stopped the moment I met you, Pierrot."

"You..."

Pierre doesn't look like he knows how to finish that sentence, but Charles understands him anyway. "How was I supposed to tell you? I was seven, Pierre, and your timer didn't stop. I thought it was a mistake for years."

"But?" Pierre asks, like he can tell there was a but.

Charles beams at him. "But, I realised that there was nobody else who could be my perfect match. So I thought you were my soulmate after all, but it was unrequited."

"Never," Pierre says with a fierceness Charles doesn't expect. "Charles, never. If I knew... if I thought I had even half a chance, I would have been with you anyway."

Charles tries to laugh, but it comes out all breathless. "No you wouldn't."

"Yes, I would," Pierre argues, and his voice is heartbreakingly sincere. "I don't care. I would have chosen you."

Charles hears a punched-out noise, and it takes him a moment to realise it came from him. The next moment, he's unbuckling his seatbelt and climbing awkwardly over to sit on Pierre's lap.

It's not quite comfortable, because for all its luxury, the white Ferrari does not have a lot of leg space - but Charles doesn't think either of them give a single fuck, in this moment.

"I love you," he tells Pierre, reaching up to cup his cheek. "I've always loved you, but I never would have stood between you and your soulmate."

"Funny," Pierre says, his hands coming up to grip Charles' hips, "because that's exactly what stopped me from kissing you senseless."

"Well," Charles says, and if he grinds down just a little on Pierre's lap, he'll swear to everyone who asks that it was accidental. "It doesn't have to stop us anymore."

"Never again," Pierre agrees, tightening his grip on Charles' hips. "Never."

"So kiss me senseless, please," Charles whispers, and then he adds "soulmate," and that's what does it. Pierre surges up and kisses him, wild and desperate and more than a little clumsy, but without question the best kiss Charles has ever had. His own cap digs into his forehead a little, but Charles can't even bring himself to care about that - they owe too much to this cap now, honestly.

Maybe the universe does know what it's doing after all, Charles thinks. Maybe the universe just wanted to write a good story for them. A story that goes like this:

Charles' soulmate timer stopped when he was seven years old, and he met the boy with the bluest eyes he'd ever seen.

Almost twenty years later, Pierre's soulmate timer stopped in a white Ferrari in Montreal, and Charles finally got to kiss the boy with the bluest eyes he's ever seen, the man who is his best friend and his soulmate.

The odds of it working out this way have to be... a million to one, probably, or maybe even less.

But then again, what are the odds that two boys who met at a French karting cup and became friends with a shared dream would both make it to Formula 1?

Maybe the answer is just that Pierre and Charles have always liked beating the odds.

~

(50 Romance Prompts Ask Meme) <- not currently taking more prompts, sorry!

[sweetcarrotsandroses97]

~ Blossom of Affection | JJK

Pairing: CEO!husband!Jungkook x writer!fem!wife!Reader

Warnings: this is mostly fluff guys, a sprinkle of angst if you squint, idiots in love, more progress!, food ingestion. (let me know if I missed anything!)

Summary: We take another glimpse into yours and Jungkook's marriage and how things seem to be improving between you both. It all was perfect, it all was meant to last forever. That is his intention: to keep you by his side as Jungkook realised a truth his heart had known for quite sometime now. Affection bloomed in the desolated desert of the arrangement, now you both have to keep it and treasure that affection that morphed into something else without neither of you knowing about it.

Word Count: 4.3k

A/N Hi guys! Welcome to the third chapter of "Sweet Marriage: A Handsome Husband Series" I hope you are as excited as I am for this part. I struggled a bit to write it as- well it's really fluffy and has the good stuff in it but I personally find it easier to write angst O.o

ALSO, thank you guys so much for 100 followers! You all make me so happy and I am over the moon there are people out there who enjoy my writing. I just finished writing this that I couldn't resist to publish it while also gifting you something for all the support I've received since I started this blog. Thank you so much, sweet ones! 💜💜💜

~ Let me know your thoughts in the comments please!

Drabbles are open for this series! 💜

Time seemed to fly when you were with Jungkook. It flew out of your hands, leaving you with sweet memories of shy smiles and delicate touches here and there.

Neither of you had brought the conversation with his parents at the restaurant. So it seemed that subject was clear, it would be explored in the future by the two of you. No-one else.

You were currently in the kitchen of the large apartment you shared with your handsome husband, you were looking down a list of ingredients and instructions as you were determined to cook Jungkook a nice meal for when he'd come home after work.

You wanted to surprise him, to thank him for all the soft attention he has had with you since the beginning of your married life alongside him. It was the least you could do and you sincerely hoped he'd like your little surprise and maybe allow you to do more things for him.

It was something you wanted, something your heart needed you to do. A soft smile was plastered on your face as you took out a knife from the drawer and prepared yourself to cut the vegetables.

The idea of making him something to eat came to you in the form of a YouTube video after having searched for tips for wives. And after reading the comments, you wanted to make something for Jungkook too. Hoping that he'd like what you'd cook for him.

"I already sent the report to Hoseok, he also confirmed the deal with Mr. Cha was closed. We expect the shipment to arrive on the 15th."

Jimin said, finishing his report to Jungkook. It was a normal day at the corporation, slightly busier than other days but nothing out of the ordinary.

"Thanks, Jimin-ah. If that was all, you may go."

The younger man began typing an email on his laptop for Mr. Cha thanking him for the deal they were able to pull together. Jungkook's eyes snapped forward, seeing as Jimin was still standing in front of his desk.

"Do you have anything else to tell me?"

The shorter man gave him a teasing smile that made Jungkook roll his eyes in an almost playful way as he shut down his laptop and paid his friend and colleague all his attention.

"Go on, spit it out."

Jimin was quick to take a seat in one of the two chairs in front of him. The eagerness radiated from his body like the heat from the sun.

"How are things going on? Between you and (y/n)?"

Jungkook sighed, his eyes locking momentarily on his silver wedding band around his finger.

"Fine, I guess."

Jimin clicked his tongue, shaking his head in disappointment.

"Things cannot be just fine, Kook. In married life, things are either bad or good. Fine is practically a synonym for bad in this field, aish you still have a lot to learn."

The younger one frowned at his friend. He better have Mrs. Baek’s signature on the property contract instead of gossiping with him about his married life.

"Well, things are fine, Jimin. They are not perfect but they are not bad either. It is a slow progression."

"You wish for things to change yet you are scared of moving too fast, isn't it? I've met some couples in your same situation, Kookie, trust me it will get better."

Jungkook stared at his friend, there was a gleam in Jimin's eyes, his voice sounded more cheerful than usual.

"How do you know so much about married life when you are the most single person on Earth?"

Jimin laughed, throwing his head back as the sound resonated across the walls of the office.

"Coaches don't play, though I must admit I have played the game of love from time to time."

Jungkook's eyes widened. Rarely had his shorter friend spoken about his love life.

"But that is not the subject at hand, Kook. We are talking about your marriage, your love life."

The doe-eyed man let out a deep sigh, his mind raising with thoughts of you, memories he cherished deeply.

"Tell me, what is it about her that has you so enamoured?"

Jungkook thought for a moment, all those times he had felt his heart pound in his chest, when butterflies had fluttered in his stomach, when all his mind could think of was you and you alone.

"Everything about her, Jimin, is simply... mesmerising. I love her voice, her personality, that gleam in her eyes, the way she chews her bottom lip when she's writing, how she welcomes me home every day and waits for me no matter the time. Her mere existence is enough to make me happy. It's just... her."

Jimin smiled knowingly. Even when he could be seen as a flirt and sometimes a tease, he knew more about life than people often gave him credit for.

"You love her, don't you?"

The blond haired man said, almost as if stating it. He had once guessed the crush his friend had on his own wife; it wasn't difficult for him to tell when Jungkook, one of his most expressive friends, was in love.

The latter took a second to think about the statement. Only a second. He didn't need any longer as he nodded.

"I do. I think I have for a while, I just didn't want to... I don't know, accept it then tell her and for her to not accept my feelings."

Jungkook was aware of the name his heart screamed. It was now pointless to deny it any longer as he had voiced his feelings out loud. He was in love. He loved you. Something as normal as love in a married man was as foreign as water on Mars for him.

Sometimes Jungkook wished his marriage hadn't been arranged. He, more times than often thought about different ways he could have met you, made you fall in love with him and then marry you. But his parents had complicated everything, he had started that cycle from the back and now it was tough to approach step two: make you love him.

But maybe, if his parents hadn't married him off, perhaps he'd have never met you. You both would have existed like parallel lines, living the same timeline but never meant to meet.

Jungkook's wish was for you to love him. He thought he had to make you fall in love with him without knowing that in your heart, his name was engraved in the golden letters of forever.

You had just finished cooking some Japchae for when your husband came home. You were really proud of the final result and now you only had to wait for Jungkook to come back.

Giving that he had been leaving the company earlier than before, you didn't doubt that he'd be home by dinner time. Now you just had to wait a bit, killing some time while giving your novel a final read.

The clock ticked by slowly, as if your life was in slow motion. But then you heard it, the electronic lock unlocked with its usual noise, the door opened and in came Jungkook. You smiled, a motion that you couldn't stop. As involuntary as the beating of your heart. As inevitable as the rising of the sun every morning and the moon rising at night.

It just happened. Existed in and on itself. Like your love for your husband that was kept in unsaid words and longing gazes.

"You're back early."

Was what you said as you stood up from the couch and walked towards the main entrance. He smiled at you. In a soft way. Delicate. Like a rose petal.

Jungkook didn't know what to say, he was so happy with seeing you that all the words he had previously rehearsed in his mind were erased. As if white paint had fallen over a canvas. Hiding every trace of his thoughts. His heart was beating wildly in his chest, a gleam in his eyes found your own (e/c) pools.

He didn't say anything. No words would have been enough to express what he was feeling. There was no way to describe such emotions. Jungkook extended his arm towards you and you gasped as you saw what he held in his left hand, the silver wedding band in his finger stole your attention for a moment before your focus was on the bouquet of sunflowers he presented to you.

"Kook."

That nickname again. It escaped your lips without you noticing it. Not that he minded, a soft blush dusted his cheeks and butterflies swarmed in his stomach when your fingers grazed his own as you took the bouquet from his hold.

"I was on my way home when I saw the flowers and thought of you."

You smiled, trying to hide the gesture behind the beautiful yellow flowers. Butterflies flew in your stomach at his words. The look in his doe-eyes made you flustered.

"I really like them, thank you."

Jungkook looked down as a smile grew on his face as well. The moment itself was perfect, innocent in its own way. Romantic in the name of love. Pure.

"I... I also have something for you."

You said before biting your lower lip. You felt a sudden nervousness creep up your spine at the thought of presenting your dinner to your husband whom you married as a stranger yet now owned your mind and heart like he couldn't imagine.

"You do?"

He asked, impressed. Lifting an eyebrow in curiosity, he gazed into your eyes with sincerity and happiness. A concept that made you nod, not being able to word out your raging thoughts.

Your hand took a hold of his own. You burned at his touch and your heart sped up, you walked toward the dining room taking Jungkook with you. He couldn't help the eagerness that cursed through his body. A smile on his lips as he followed you across the apartment.

"I made you some dinner. I hope you will like it."

He smiled. How could he not? He looked down at you and if you had looked at him that exact moment you'd have seen the absolute adoration his heart held for you. The woman who was able to call herself his wife.

"Why don't you put your flowers in a vase and join me for dinner?"

You nodded, suddenly remembering that your hand was still holding his. You retrieved it from his hold and walked back to the kitchen, trying to hide your very obvious blush over your cheeks.

Jungkook chuckled to himself at your reaction while his heart swelled with love at the surprise you had for him. He'd be lying if he said he hadn't wished for this precise moment to happen as he had often heard some of his colleagues and employees - married men at that- comment about their respective wives' cooking.

Leaving the misogyny aside, he loved the thought. A soft act of service. A gentle reminder of love, an existing pattern of compromise.

You returned to the dining room carrying a heavy looking vase where the sunflowers rested. You put it on the centre of the table and turned to look at your husband, a nervous smile on your face, one that he'd describe as cute, was painted over your lips.

"I hope you are in the mood for some japchae."

Jungkook sat in front of you on the dining table. There was a plate with japchae in front of him as well as a bowl of white rice and a bottle of soju to enjoy. It was silent between you both, the only thing that could be heard in the grand space was the sound of cutlery hitting the plates, of soju being poured and some sighs at the delicious taste of the food.

"You... This is so good, (y/n)."

Exclaimed your husband, you chuckled at his reaction as you watched him enjoy the prepared glass noodles with a frown of pleasure between his brows. A gesture you couldn’t help but find cute. 

"I'm glad you liked it. You can thank @tradiKfood on YouTube for the recipe."

He snorted, cheeks puffy with food and you laughed at his reaction. Jungkook noticed how much he liked that sound. Your laughter. It was sweet and breathy; refreshing like an autumn breeze on the beach during the early hours of the day. It sounded so carefree and safe. Genuine.

If you had been able to read his mind you'd have noticed how he vowed to himself to always make sure to hear that laughter. So joyous. So you.

"By the way, I have an appointment with my editor tomorrow."

He raised an eyebrow at you, swallowing his mouthful of food before saying, placing his chopsticks next to his bowl of rice.

"Really? Did you already finish your next book?"

You nodded in happiness and Jungkook couldn't feel more proud of you. He had read your first novel before you became his wife and he thought it was written so beautifully. The plot was amazing and the characterization was made with expertise. That was what he had thought. And that idea was still settled in his mind up until today.

You were a talented writer and he was sure you were going to get far with your amazing stories but he knew he'd be damned if he didn't offer you every kind of support at his reach to make your dreams come true.

"I did. I actually like how it ended, you know? I hope Mrs. Ming will share that thought with me."

He offered you a soft smile. And you took a second to marvel at how handsome your husband truly was. He had taken off his jacket, leaving him in only his white shirt with the first buttons open as well as rolled sleeves that revealed his inked art on his right arm. His dark hair was a bit dishevelled as he had run his hands over it once or twice since he arrived home.

His back faced the large windows that gave away the mesmerising view of the city lights, the moon was high on the night sky and the stars were in his big eyes.

"I wish I could read it."

You looked down at your unfinished bowl of rice as you tried to suppress a smile, a gesture that eventually marked your beautiful features.

"You can, once it's out."

You looked up at the sound of him clicking his tongue only to laugh at his expression, brows furrowed and lips pouting. He looked cute. And that was saying something given how hot and handsome he looked at that moment.

"I know it will be amazing."

His words warmed your heart. The love for your work had come to you in many ways but to hear such praise from your husband who you were madly in love with meant the entire world to you. Maybe even more.

"Thanks, Kook."

He smiled. Absolutely loving how that nickname sounded on your lips. He wanted to hear it every day, every morning when he woke up and every night when he came back from work. It meant something because it was you who were saying it. You made it special, like a magic charm only you had over his life.

Enchanting his days, bewitching his soul, transfiguring his life as the owner of his heart.

The night was still young. You were curled over the couch, eyes trained on the large TV hanging from the wall as you watched a movie. But this time it was different all because of a certain someone sitting next to you. And that someone was Jungkook.

He had also changed into more comfortable clothes, wearing a pair of grey sweatpants and a white t-shirt on. You wore your soft and comfortable nightgown in a light shade of blue.

The two of you decided to watch a movie before going to sleep. He suggested it, you accepted. With the one and only purpose to be close to him for a bit longer, even if you two weren't talking, if you weren't directly seeing him, the quality time still counted and fuelled your heart.

Jungkook felt how his heart sped up when you sat next to him on the couch, your eyes were trained on the large screen but he was going to enjoy this time with you. This indirect coexistence. It was natural on its own, lovely so as to describe it somehow.

You tucked your knees up to your chest, completely invested in the plot of the movie unaware of the soft and longing gazes your husband sent your way from now and then.

Is this how it feels?

Jungkook asked himself as his dark eyes rested on your side profile, the movie plot could be damned as he had the most beautiful woman on earth sitting right next to him.

Is this how it is to fall in love?

You smiled at the screen, laughing softly at one of the dialogues he didn't hear. You turned to look at him, a smile on your face and he felt how his world stopped turning. It was magical. Like a spell you casted over him. Like a sweet candy after taking a sour medicine.

You bit your lip and directed your gaze back to the TV but your focus was on your husband. He occupied your mind, owned your thoughts, claimed your soul without knowing. Your heart soared at the fact of having him so close.

So close yet so far. There were so many things you wanted to say, so many things you needed him to know, things you wished to speak about. But he was unreachable in that level of intimacy. Something you wish to break and you thought that the crystal wall that existed between you both was already cracking. Cracking with the dagger of love. Of the blossom of affection that began to grow in between the marriage.

"Love is not something to be ashamed of, you should tell her."

Said one of the characters in the movie. That single sentence of dialogue felt like a punch to reality for Jungkook. Should he really tell you?

"But what if she doesn't love me back? I prefer to love her in silence, in silence there is no refusal on her part."

This movie was getting too personal for Jungkook. Those thoughts had also swarmed in his head for so long. Days in which his mind was plagued with the image of you, when your voice spoke his thoughts and your presence invaded his heart.

He looked at you softly, watching how you relaxed on the couch and covered your mouth with the back of your hand as you yawned.

"It's late, (y/n). Do you want to go to bed?"

But you shook your head, a sleepy expression on your face as you looked at your husband, loving the caring tone in his voice.

"No, I wanna see when he confesses."

He chuckled, running a hand through his already messy hair.

"You can always watch it later, it's on Netflix for a reason."

You shook your head again, a cute pout over your lips.

"But I want to watch it with you."

That left him speechless. His mind was blank, an empty canvas with no words for him to express freely. You did that to him, that and other many things he had only experimented with you by his side.

Jungkook lifted his arm and rested it on the back of the couch before his hand took a hold of your shoulder as he pushed you towards him. It was a bold move. You gasped. Thankful that the flat was swimming in darkness so that your husband couldn't see your pretty obvious blush painting your cheeks.

A second passed in silence, then another and another. Maybe a minute or it could have been an hour in which the both of you stayed there, too stunned to speak, too afraid to break the moment.

"Just relax, if you fall asleep you could fall off the couch and hurt yourself."

Lame, he thought to himself. Jungkook mentally slapped himself at the weak excuse he said, he thought it was stupid. His brain malfunctioned when you were this close yet it also pressured him to say something so as to break any crumbs of awkwardness between you both.

"Thanks."

You replied, feeling your skin burning where he touched you, tingles travelled up your spine and along your body. It was magical. Perfect. As if he had planned it all completely when it had only been a spur of the moment.

After some time leaning against Jungkook, you relaxed completely so as to rest your head on his shoulder. The motion made his breath hitch in his throat. He was the most fortunate man in that moment, in that fragment of time for he was able to hold you and keep you close.

You trusted him, you were safe being near him and that made his heart soar with happiness. The simple fact that you stayed by his side willingly made him feel happiness like never before. Fortunate. Lucky. Chosen.

The one and only man who was destined to love you, he was meant to worship you as his wife, to protect you from the world and to give you all the love he was physically capable of carrying in his heart.

The soft patter of rain against the large windows reached his ears and calmed his soul. It was perfect, that exact moment was absolute and pure perfection. The definition of that word was that moment, with light rain falling over Seoul, a nice movie as background noise with you cuddled by his side in cosy clothes. 

Jungkook felt your body lean further into him as you grew lax in his embrace, the soft sound of your calming breathing made him smile, squeezing your shoulder a bit from where his hand rested against you. He knew you were tired but the mere thought of you wanting to stay a bit longer by his side warmed his heart. 

He looked down at you, eyes trailing over your sleeping figure. He smiled in adoration, in contemplation, in admiration. In love. 

As discreetly as possible he paused the movie and turned the TV off, leaving the apartment in an aerie silence. Only the sound of rain along with this racing heart were heard. His inked hand caressed your cheek in a delicate motion. Almost as if you were a glass doll and he was afraid of breaking you. 

Because you were so precious to him, his perfect gem he ought to keep, love and protect. As a husband, as your lover but most importantly, as your man. For he was already yours even if, in the end, you’d change your mind and left him with his own memories of you. He was yours. In this life and the next one. 

When Jungkook loved, he loved hard. Completely. Wholeheartedly. And now, you were the owner of that love. 

Your skin was soft under his touch, slightly chilly from the coolness of the flat but soft nonetheless. As soft as he had ever touched in his life. Jungkook lifted you into his arms, cradling you against his chest with precise yet gentle movements as he began walking towards your shared bedroom. 

Passing Bam’s house on the way, he smiled at his already sleeping Dobermann before resuming his destination while carrying you in his arms. If you had been awake at that moment, you’d have heard the loud thumping of his heart beneath his ribcage. It was such a strong motion Jungkook feared for a second his heart was going to leave its confinement.

He laid you down on the bed delicately, making sure you were comfortable enough before he climbed on his side of the bed and dropped the cover over you both, chasing the chill away and enveloping you in a warmth that dropped you further into the land of dreams.

His hand found your own underneath the blankets, long fingers trailed softly over your wedding band. The sign to the world that you belong with Jungkook. A promise of respect and love; of sincerity and happiness. 

“I love you, (y/n).”

Those whispered words were meant for your ears only, but not yet for your mind to comprehend. However, Jungkook couldn’t live another minute on this Earth without him speaking such words of adoration. 

The whisper was so soft that only he could hear it, afraid that if he spoke any louder the perfect moment would shatter like a glass colliding with the merciless reality. He wished to persevere in your affection, a blooming love that grew in between the cracks of a twisted marriage. 

“I love you so much, my (y/n).”

You turned to him in your sleep and had it not been for the darkness of the bedroom, the blush in his cheeks would have been evident as you pressed yourself to his chest, your face nuzzled into him as you sighed in your unconscious state. Almost as if you had heard him declare his love for you, perhaps you had. But he couldn’t know that. 

It was a simple assumption that pierced his thoughts over the blossom of affection between you two. Between husband and wife and the slits of unspoken love in the middle of the relationship. 

Maybe it had been arranged, but that doesn’t mean the feelings were fake. It was a move of fate, a destined meeting. The blooming of care and its transformation to love. It all happened for a reason, and there was nothing Jungkook desired more than for you to stay by his side forever and claim that place next to him; the place of his wife. Loved by her husband in a world of lies and vanities but with affection still able to bloom and grow in the depths of his heart that only screamed your name.

~Masterpost

Sept/17/2023

~ Drabbles are open for this au! My inbox is open, darlings!

☕Caffeinate me so I can keep on writing! ☕

[erraticprocrastinator]

Maybe I’m imagining it, but am I the only one who’s noticed a significant shift in fandom culture very recently?

This is coming from someone who’s “grown up” with modern fandom culture, and I’m not even talking about the differences between now and six years ago, when I first started participating in fandom spaces. I mean recently as in the past few months, maybe the last year? Again, maybe this is just in my head, but, I swear, I feel like I’ve been seeing a bigger and bigger division between creators (fan artists, fic writers etc) and audiences (readers etc) across multiple fandoms and in general fan spaces, too.

In particular, it feels like reader entitlement when it comes to fanfics is becoming much more prevalent than I’m used to seeing. I’ve been coming across so many posts, across multiple platforms, trying to justify re-uploading others’ work, coming after authors who orphan or (god forbid) delete their fics, complaining about unfinished WIPs, and so many other things that honestly give me the ick. I know that, as an author myself, I’m biased towards these kinds of posts, but I really do feel like there’s been a shift from fans who really are just genuinely invested in this content to a way more hostile attitude. I’m used to seeing people who are upset about a favourite fic being removed, or disappointed about an abandoned WIP, but I’ve just never noticed so many people outright vilifying authors for it, or promoting things like using the Wayback Machine to copy and repost deleted content (something I have now seen people suggesting to each other on multiple occasions). It’s starting to put me off from actively participating in fandom at all, which I really don’t want to happen.

Even setting that particular issue aside, I’ve also noticed a huge uptake in people shaming both authors/artists and readers for the kind of content they produce and consume. I genuinely don’t think I can scroll through any of my social media feeds without finding at least one post complaining about a certain ship, or the way Author X portrays Character Y, or the existence of Dead Dove, or literally any other tag or trope that’s ever existed on AO3 or any other major site. I’m not talking about people asking others about their preferences, or people who say something just isn’t their cup of tea. I’m talking about posts, dozens of dozens of posts, made with the sole purpose of saying “eww, why does XYZ thing even exist, I mean who could ever read/write this, you’re disgusting if you do”, completely unsolicited, about every possible content you can imagine. I’m genuinely asking, whatever happened to “don’t like, don’t read” and “you’re allowed to click away”? Again, I’ve only ever known relatively recent fandom culture, but I always thought that “you do you” was the generally accepted attitude? I was actually anxious about posting my most recent fic because of this, and I’m honestly still a little afraid that I’m going to get a comment tearing apart my characterisation or end up as the subject of some unhinged Reddit thread — and what I write is pretty tame, compared to the darker works out there.

Have fandom spaces always been like this and I’m somehow only realising now, or has anyone else noticed these things, too? Is there some piece of the puzzle that I’m missing? I’d particularly love it if other fic writers could weigh in, because I’m really curious to see if it’s just me who’s seeing things this way.

[lemonsrosesandlavender]

Writer Interview Tag

Thanks for the tags, @darkurgetrash and @kimberbohwrites <3 I really enjoyed reading yours! I tag… hmmm, who hasn’t done it yet? @dutifullylazybread @commander-krios and @redroomroaving ? (And consider this a free tag if you want it!)

When did you start writing?

I honestly couldn’t say when my very first act of creative writing was, I feel like I’ve been writing on and off my whole life (barring like 5 years from 16-21). When I was 8 or 9 is the first I really remember though. I kept a diary religiously at that time (yes, it’s hilarious), and also attempted several stories that went nowhere, including a glorious portal fantasy about two children who are isekai’d into a kingdom of cats and have to face off against an evil cat stealing wizard. As you can tell, I love cats, lmao. And I have always loved portal fantasies and isekai. A through-line all the way to Planar Tears!

Are there different themes or genres you enjoy reading than what you write?

Oooh. Well, there are very few genres I *wouldn’t* read, and I’ve only written so much, so I suppose most genres currently sit in this pile for me? I can’t really see myself writing original sci-fi, despite loving it as a genre, because I think it really lives or dies on having an excellent concept more than a lot of other forms of fiction. Short of being struck with a lightning bolt of inspiration, I think I’d lack purpose. But I love, love, love science fiction. Isaac Asimov, Philip K Dick, N.K. Jemisin, Octavia Butler, John Wyndham, Marge Piercy, Ted Chiang… all of these SF authors’ stories have a place in my heart.

Is there a writer you want to emulate or get compared to often?

No-one has yet compared me to anyone. I often realise that I’m going a little too Austen in my work, and gently push myself to modernise - but I guess that speaks to the fact that whilst I admire her, I don’t want to exactly emulate her? I love the way she gently teases her characters, the way she makes clear the contrast between what they believe and what’s actually true without being cruel. But I don’t want to write a pastiche.

On the other end of the spectrum, I recently re-read My Year of Rest and Relaxation and was reminded of how much I love Otessa Moshfegh’s cold, somewhat brutal cataloguing of the world around her character; her sparse but vivid imagery (casting aside a pair of shoes like “dead crows”) and her unlikeable but extremely readable MC. I should read more of her work!

Basically, I love to read and have a wide spectrum of influences, but I’m not aiming to emulate any single one of them. I would say my writing swings between archaic and more efficient depending on whether I’ve read classic or modern literature most recently, because I love both.

Can you tell me a bit about your writing space?

I have many. On my phone anywhere - especially the commute - and at home on a laptop, either sat at our dining table (we live in a rental flat in an expensive city, a proper desk would be a luxury), or on the sofa with my girlfriend and flatmate sometimes contributing "suggestions" lol. If I'm in a writing phase, which I have been for a year - every space is a writing space.

What's your most effective way to muster up a muse?

Hmmm. I am rarely in a completely creatively fallow period - unless I'm just straight up obsessed with a game/TV show/the gym, in which case I'm busy having a good time in other ways - but I'm not always in the writing zone. I like textile crafts and sewing, and art hobbies generally. I guess that is to say, if the writing muse is not present, I rarely miss it; I'm probably thinking about something else.

(Barring the times when my mental health is fucked, but even then, I'm probably throwing myself really hard into a hobby as a distraction. I'm an all or nothing person). When I'm struggling with writer's block on say, a chapter of a long fic, it's usually because it's not quite headed in the right direction, and I need to backtrack, take stock of where my characters are emotionally, and try again in a different direction. Honestly... I know it's advised against by some, but sometimes I just have to sit down and make myself write just to figure out what's wrong. Just do it, and rip it up later if you have to. (**put it in a separate doc in case you can use it elsewhere. you probably wrote it for a reason. DO NOT TILT OFF THE FACE OF THE EARTH AND DELETE YOUR SHIT, NO MATTER HOW FRUSTRATING).

Are there any recurring themes in your writing? Do they surprise you?

Number one is “coming to terms with making mistakes in your vocation, and recognising that you are more than your talent at it.” It’s the reason that draws me to Rolan in the first place, because it mirrors my own life experiences very closely. I was somewhat picked on and harassed in school (shit that many of us have experienced) and built my whole personality around being smart and having my life planned out as a shield against it. I was going to do [thing], I was really good at it, and it was all clear. Not to mention I loved this subject. So when I got into a prestigious university my life was sorted, right? Except... all of the hideous self-esteem issues and perfectionism I'd been papering over came crashing down all at once, and I was in an incredibly unforgiving environment, in a very male-dominated subject where other (male) students would literally be like huh, isn't it weird more women don't study this subject? Why do YOU think that is? I felt like I was worthless, stupid and useless, and that I stuck out like a sore thumb - and I was carrying the weight of every woman who wanted to do my subject and was afraid they weren't good enough. My life plans crumbled before my eyes, and I was severely depressed, alongside other health issues - which my uni did not give two fucks about, at all.

Which is to say, I draw many parallels between my own arc and Rolan's - being an outsider, the precarity of having your own talent validated only to have your entire future rest on it, and being vulnerable to really shitty messaging about how hard I should be working and how it was obviously my fault if I wasn't succeeding already, when they were one of the best universities around. And then I realised I was writing similar experiences with Catrin and SW Tav - discovering, and appreciating, that you're more than this one crutch you cling to, this singular skill that you desperately need to hold you above the maelstrom of life. And I promise that, like Rolan, this has a happy ending - I personally took some years out after battling through undergrad, faced my demons, and returned to the subject that I loved as a far more well-rounded person, better equipped to deal with failure. I'm not perfect, and I never will be. I'm neurotic and perfectionistic and all the rest. And that's probably why I keep writing, and exploring this theme - to remind myself that I want to avoid that trap, and to deal with the ways I feel when I'm in it. I was gonna write about kink here too, but I think this is enough, lol.

What is your reason for writing?

Joy. I love exercising my creative drive. And I love re-reading what I've written!

Obsession. These fuckers, these plot points, occupy every spare inch of brain and will not stop until I vent them.

Learning. Honing my skills is a frustration and a pleasure.

Connection. I'm so, so grateful to have people who read and care about my work. It means the world.

Horny. Um. Yeah. I have no further explanation for this one lmao. Except. Fantasies are amazing, but then writing them down makes them even better because now you're really thinking about the specifics and those specifics come to mind more easily next time you're [REDACTED. CABBAGE STOP. ENOUGH!!!]

Is there any specific comment or type of comment you find particularly motivating?

I can’t pick just one! A balanced diet of comments is the best ;)

I joke but - I love them all. Shouting about the plot? You're invested, and I'm grateful. "Additional kudos" twenty chapters in? You've stuck with me this far, and I'm grateful. I guess if I had to pick a few:

1. Strong emotional responses. Kicking my feet/biting my keyboard/stressed/blushing/screaming - whatever fits the mood of the scene. I’m so happy my writing evoked strong feelings. That’s a good chunk of the point, right?

2. Writing analysis. Picking out individual lines or highlighting certain aspects - characterisation, dramatic tension, etc. The day someone said that I "had a knack for showing character in a single action" and then provided examples, I nearly exploded. Augh. I particularly love comments on my OCs because they're especially precious to me. My own brain children, and you LIKE them? heaven for reader. heaven for reader for 1000 years.

3. “I should be sleeping but instead I read this” AND I AM KISSING YOU. That’s all.

4. Just straight up compliments. "I love this" thank you I'm crying. ahhhhhhh. Cute lil kudos graphics (you know who you are). I'm over the moon you enjoy my work. <3

How do you want to be thought about by your readers?

Well, I know for certain that a large swathe of my readers perceive me as “the one who writes good subby Rolan porn” and frankly? I love that reputation. If nobody appreciated the SFW elements of my work, I might feel differently, because thoughtful storytelling is also really important to me - but I feel seen in that regard too, so I can delight in knowing my writing has a distinctive flavour. Kinky chilli ice cream, spicy and sweet.

I would also love to hope my readers think of me fondly when they get the next long fic email, and are excited to continue the story. Oh, and I hope my readers enjoy chatting in my comment section, because I do. All I can aim for is to be the friendly author who "rites gud". Fingers crossed I meet that bar :)

What do you feel is your greatest strength as a writer?

You know what? I might not have said this once upon a time, but I actually think I’m pretty decent at plotting. I think I wind various threads together quite well, and with purpose.

I think I’m pretty good at observing character too. I hope. I’ve written so much Rolan that he’s really taken on a life of his own, but I do often rewatch his cutscenes (I know, such a chore 😉) and think I have a good sense for him. I also think that although Catrin started out difficult to write, I developed a very distinct character for her too, which I’m glad about.

When you write, are you influenced by what others might enjoy reading, or do you write purely for yourself, or a mix of both?

90% of what I’m writing is for me. I want it to be the best it can be, for me; I want it to cover the themes I care about. I want to tell the story in my head. Before BG3, I wrote for a teeny tiny fandom, inaugurating its fandom tag, and that inoculated me a little against writing for stats because well, thirty kudos felt like an INCREDIBLE achievement in that fandom.

Also, I want to write my kinky filth and not dilute it. That means actively CHOOSING not to worry about whether people are put off, because they absolutely, certainly will be in cases.

However, I do also care about my readers; I love comments and I want to give them the best story I can. I really enjoy my NSFW prompts; since my tumblr connections know the baseline of what I’m into, they can throw out AMAZING ideas that I love writing and am deeply grateful for. I’ve also definitely pushed harder on fics and oneshots because I knew a particular commenter or mutual was super excited for them ❤️ (shout out to my piss kink cheerleader lol, and everyone who has kindly - or ferally - expressed interest in my longfics).

How do you feel about your own writing?

Mostly very good! I do struggle with writer’s block sometimes, but my particular combination of perfectionism and obstinacy means I don’t tend to publish my work until I’m happy with it. I can see imperfections in my work, especially my past work, but I do genuinely enjoy the process of learning even if it frustrates me sometimes. I really enjoy re-reading what I’ve written later, because by the time it gets out there into the world, I’ve always beaten it into something I’m proud of.

I can't deny that I do, occasionally, get bitten by the little green monster though. Seeing someone else's Rolan writing get called "the best" or whatever has me nursing a tiny stab of pain. And I know it's valid - I'm not *the* best writer of all time, I'm just writing my reasonably-good stories out here, but I can't deny that small oof. (I'm tipsy so you're getting rather honest Cabbage tonight). I'm also very aware that I get many wonderful comments and treasure them, so I just accept my limitations a bit and try not to think too much about other peoples' writing that is along similar lines to my own. You're all writing beautiful stuff and I support you, but I will go NUTS if I spend my life reading closely-related fic. (If I have read your fic, know I fought my inner demons to do it, lol). Idk. I write what I want to write, as well as I can, and I'm grateful that people want to read it. Seriously. You have no idea how much every bookmark and subscription and lovely comment mean to me <3 And all I can do is my best to master this lovely art form and carve out from the marble an approximation of what I see in my head.

[fraudulent-cheese]

So i finished watching TDPI (and i have a theory on why it's so hated)

Yeah, it's actually been nearly a week since i watched the finale. Took me that long to scrounge up the motivation to write this post lol

I watched episodes 9-13 with my buddy @rockin-it-rusty again, and i have. thoughts.

Honestly, Hurl and Go Seek and Scarlett Fever were probably the highlights of the season. They're pretty funny episodes, where both Jasmine and Shawn's conflict is solved and Sky and Dave's relationship hits a brick fucking wall due to Dave's own character flaws. The set-up for the challenge is also pretty unique for an eating challenge and i like the comedy! Also Scarlett Fever having an actual antagonistic force is fun.

But i'll be real: I barely even remember anything from episode 11. And i don't remember much from episode 12, either. Doesn't help i wasn't the most concentrated on the episodes themselves, but the challenges and the character relationships weren't the most compelling/interesting to me. I'll say this though, Sugar and Sky's weird little alliance was fun while it lasted.

As for Lies, Cries and One Big Prize... God, the finale's mid. Im already not invested in Jasmine and Shawn's conflict, and im not gonna be invested in this either! But i think Skave's conflict is actually interesting here! Sky kissing Dave while having a boyfriend back home she wanted to break up with but forgetting to is interesting, and even Dave reacting very very badly to being rejected in episode 9 was fun to see. It's like. Oh my god. A relationship this season having some depth??? That i don't need to extrapolate myself?? There's three things that kill it for me though.

If you've been following this blog for a while, or hell have talked to me on Discord, you KNOW i am not a fan of straight, basic romance, and that's basically all that skave is for like half the season. Granted they have a better start than jashawn, who just blush at eachother once and then the plot happens, but that doesn't mean it's any less boring to me! The misscommunications are frustating because they feel completely artificial, and they only get compelling by Hurl and Go Seek. The episode Dave gets eliminated in.

The second thing that bothers me is that Sky leading Dave on in the finale (and that is what she's doing during the final challenge since she doesn't want to date him afterwards) is out of character for her. Her whole thing is winning honestly; she literally tells Sugar two episodes earlier that she can't cheat during the challenges or else they won't have an alliance because Sky's uncomfortable with that. Why would she be comfortable leading anyone on, even if it's for a victory then? It's still cheating! You could argue it's to push a contrast between her sportsmanship and her apparently being a disaster in relationships in that regard but i seriously doubt that's what the writers were going for!

The final nail in the coffin for me though is Dave's entire reaction. It's pretty funny how pathetic he is about it in episode 9, but his attempted murder of Sky is going just a bit too far? Especially since the worst he did earlier on this season was being a little bitch and being insistent. Would i belive he'd probably not react well? Absolutely. Would he try getting back at Sky? Oh, definitely, that guy's not well adjusted. Would he try killing her? I don't think so. I don't know, Total Drama makes you do crazy shit.

But yeah, those last couple of episodes have made me realise exactly why i belive Pahkitew Island seems so hated (and by extension why World Tour is so well liked) and i think it's because of it's ending episodes. The season's peak is reached at Scarlett Fever, to the point every episode afterwards just felt way worse, both in terms of entertainment and writing. Coupled with challenges i wasn't very into, relationship conflict that wasn't very compelling to me and eliminations that weren't very convincing (episode 12 would've been so much more interesting if Sugar had gotten voted out an episode earlier. Even if i love her character!).

Frankly the attempted drama in the finale just reinforces that impression of it all being... Artificial. Not in a "The Island Is Mecanical" kind of way, in a "The Writers Are Just Forcing This Conflict" way. Like it doesn't feel like a thing the story needed, or a conflict that arose naturally from the characters' dynamics with eachother. idk.

Endings both have a huge impact on how people perceive media, as well as a lasting impression on it; it's the reason TV shows can go from dominating Pop Culture to being hated and subsequently forgotten about in a matter of weeks or months if they're lucky. Pahkitew Island is at it's funniest and most entertaining during the middle of the season and it's end arguably contains the weakest episodes out of the entire season. Contrast that with World Tour, which outside of G1 bias has it's better drama and episodes later on since all the characters it flanderized and assassinated aren't there anymore but shush As well as having good moments earlier on. Hell, if you ignore the final two minutes, World Tour can be argued to have one of the best finales and im only not saying it's the best one because both TDI and ROTI exist and have a better one. While Pahkitew Island probably has one of the worst ones. The show kinda just... Ends. Dave probably gets mauled by a robot bear and Sky, Shawn and Jasmine are off the Island and that's that.

That, coupled with the lack of character interactions is probably why people don't tend to talk about this season, which is a SHAME because it's a really fun season, with really fun characters and actually good ideas! It deserves to be explored more, appreciated more!

And with no transition at all, let's talk about my character opinions!

Dave is. Yeah, it's a whole thing. Him being more insistent in episode 9 on charming Sky at the start feels a bit forced? but it's probably because i thought the "bet you still wish i was your boyfriend" line came a little bit out of nowhere for me? Feels like it came from an earlier draft, or the writters of the episodes before it didn't keep track of where his relationship/opinion on Sky was. I do think him taking the rejection awfully and being really pathetic all episode is really funny however, and it makes skave more interesting by default to me, so it helps!

...Ok, fine, i'll talk about the finale. I'll elaborate on this in Sky's section, but it doesn't do Dave's character much favors. He feels a bit more pathetic in that episode before the existence of Sky's boyfriend is revealed, and then the whole reveal happens and... yeah. Dude seems happy by Sky possibly dying. Just feel like that's a little too far? Compared to how he was before? Idk.

I'll talk about Max first over Scarlett because i have way more to say about her than him. He's still funny. My earlier post on him is still right. His elimination is hot garbage btw, dude should've gotten kicked instead of Ella

Now, Scarlett's actually interesting, since we've gotten to the twist; i really like her in concept as a villain that is antagonistic out of a lack of morality and not just. Being a piece of shit. Then again, the whole evil vilain twist in Scarlett Fever kinda sorta entirely goes against this. Genuinely think that Max just made her fucking snap and she tried to blackmail Chris into getting the million herself because she couldn't fucking handle being around this guy. She hates him

Jasmine's fine. It's nice to see her get actual screentime, but wow she spends 90% of it glued to Shawn and it kinda sucks since i don't think i have a great grasp on her personality due to this. When i'll rewatch the season to take more precise notes i'll try to pay way more attention to her character i guess? Her clear trust issues should've been explored, just saying.

Sugar's GREAT. Seriously, she's my favorite part of the show post Scarlett Fever and it's not even close. She's genuinely funny! I love seeing her do her own thing and be a menace, it's great. The show's super mean to her about it? For some reason? I think the writters were trying to treat her like the main antagonist but she really doesn't read like one to me. Girlie deserved that spin off she mentions in episode 9. Or i guess she technically got it since she appears in Dramarama. Maybe i should watch the episodes she's in...

Shawn, like Jasmine, is kinda there for me. I do think creating conflict between these two is a good idea, but the writters just lean wayyyy too hard into the Zombie Apocalypse Nutjob aspect of his personality in episode 11 especially, it just flattens him and it's pretty sad since he's got some interesting things about him, and the way he tries to make it up to Jasmine both time they're in conflict is cute. Wish they actually communicated more tho

Finally, Sky. Oh Sky, how i wish they treated you better. Listen. In theory? I don't hate the idea of Sky having a boyfriend back home she wanted to break up with. Perfect way of adding drama to a character that didn't seem to have any. The problem is the everything with the finale. The writters make her seemingly lead Dave on during the final challenge and while she was probably going to come clean before Dave interrupts her again (which is actually a good way of showing they wouldn't work out due to him not putting in the effort of listening to her), i don't think her doing that at all would be in character. Her whole thing of good sportsmanship and winning without cheating feels off when contrasted with this. Also, girl should've really just said to Dave that she was planning to break up with her boyfriend and not to the confessional camera. Doubt that would've stopped Dave from freaking out, but at least she'll have tried i guess.

SO. I'LL ASK AGAIN: DOES PAHKITEW ISLAND DESERVE THE HATE?

NO. No it doesn't.

I'd even consider it the most underrated season of Total Drama! It just... really got fucked over by circomstances and things out of it's control. This season was written at the same time as All Stars, by like 4 writers, with a whole new cast to flesh out and only 13 episodes to do so and seemingly less ideas. You can tell that by the end, the writers really didn't care and just wanted this shit to end - the final three episodes feel like first drafts, even moreso than the earlier episodes did. And it sucks! It sucks because this season had a whole lot of potential, and it either got wasted or crapped on by the fandom at large!

I just... I wish this season got treated better, is all.

Also why the fuck does Chef only get five lines. What was up with that

[msfbgraves]

It’s sad seeing all the upsurge of hate CK6 is getting along with Johnny but tbh, I feel like it’s deserved. Daniel deserved better, so much better. I’ll die standing on that hill. I’m still watching it since I’ve watched everything else KK and CK, but I doubt I’ll like it. I’m honestly here for whatever Silverusso crumbs I can gather, if any, since I don’t care about anyone else. Oh well. I’ve been brutally disappointed in other shows and book series before, so this’ll just be another brutal disappointment. I’m sorry I invested several years of my life into this series. Daniel will always be special to me, and I do love Terry, Robby, and Sam too. Johnny and Kreese can both suck it. Well, at least there’s fanfic.

The first two seasons were good. Flawed, very much through the male gaze, but good. And then the third season showed these men's true colours: no. We're not going to take any responsibility. Johnny's is not going to grow at all. We're going to show Robby the right way of aggression in Juvie. Robby almost bested Miguel, who is some sort of karate prodigy, and we've seen Daniel get the better of several grown thugs using Miyagi-Do, but we're going to make it that, without any character motivation, Robby can't hold his own in Juvie. Against untrained kids. Because he has to learn to strike first.

Why S3 still grabbed me was that they'd promised a dark side about Daniel and Ralph delivered an in canon, in character reason: Daniel has always had a murder switch. As early as his first All Valley. And then they brought it out in CK. It was always there and you don't have to assassinate his character for it. Daniel could kill a man, with enough motivation. Isn't that what we wanted, Cobra Kai? And then Terry. OMG, what brilliance. Thomas and Ralph wrote Silverusso together and I am sure that Thomas sat these boys down and said: "You can't write Terry for shit. You will take my notes. No, I didn't stutter. I am a better tv writer than you." But Johnny also deserves better. They've erased his entire arc. If they'd wanted to tell the story of a Johnny who'd literally had the growth choked out of him by Kreese, that too would have been a brilliant story. A Johnny who was so drawn to Daniel because he represented Johnny's own good side he could no longer access. A Daniel that would have told him: Kreese is a monster and he hurt you. And he'd know because he himself had been deeply hurt by being taught Cobra Kai. He wouldn't say that to Johnny because that would be too vulnerable. But the seeds were there, it's a story they could have told, and Johnny's moment to shine could have been realising how terrible Cobra Kai was by witnessing Daniel's reaction to Terry after having seen what a positive impact Daniel had had on Robby. But they didn't go there. Their message was always that there is nothing wrong with Johnny, he never needed to grow up and their character assassination of Daniel was not due to incompetence - they just don't get him - but design. They do get him. They hate him. And now they're coming for Miyagi who they hate even more. And Ralph can play so much without words, mitigate the damage, advocate for Daniel. Billy and Marty advocated for Johnny. But Pat cannot defend Miyagi anymore. They're coming for him to rescue their own ego. Simply because these little boys in a grown man's body cannot accept that Johnny Lawrence and what he stood for was wrong, and the fact that Johnny is an interesting and ultimately good character is that when it really mattered, when it really utterly mattered, he understood that his sensei was wrong, that Bobby was right (something we subconsciously see in him naming his son after him - CK didn't do everything wrong) and that Daniel's victory was deserved. "You're alright, LaRusso!"

That is what made Johnny compelling. That is the first thing these writers came for. Don't blame Johnny. His character assassination was even worse than Daniel's. And Billy fought it. We know he fought it. We have the gag reels to show for it. And now they got him, and they got Daniel, and they're coming for Miyagi because like Kreese, they could never grapple with the simple truth that Johnny learnt: bullying is wrong and another way is possible. They're so hurt by a film that showed them they were being assholes that they have to destroy it. Because they can't do what Johnny did. Admit they were wrong. They have to kill a whole franchise that brought comfort to literally millions of people, because they need to kill the message that kindness is possible. Poison it, rather than admit to themselves they are wrong, and maybe stop being an asshole? It's never too late. But no!! Daniel made me feel bad!!! He has to be destroyed!!!!

Honestly they would have made Dutch the ultimate reformed tough guy if the actor had returned. Probably made him unearth the evidence of Miyagi stealing that medal of honor by beating Daniel in a fight.

And they're not even trying to hide it anymore. They are openly attacking the legacy of a dead man. Pat's most beloved character. Pat wasn't Miyagi, he certainly wasn't faultless, but he gifted the world something and they're coming for him to soothe their egos. Billy and Ralph had the chance to walk away. Not the obligation, but the chance. They haven't, maybe they can't for contractual reasons. But Pat has no choice, no influence, and they're coming for his legacy.

That's straight up evil. And they're boasting about it in print!

[okamirayne]

I’m one of the people who have gotten really bad at commenting on fics I read. In the case or BtB it’s mostly because I can’t figure out how to comment in the FF.net app 🙈 (In other cases I’ve been scared off by being told my reactions and interpretations were wrong, both by writers and other commenters) However, that doesn’t excuse not commenting or writing you here, so I am sorry for my negligence.

Because I am still here, I’m still reading BtB like a religious text, and I still adore every last word. I, much to my own surprise, loved reading from Hiashi’s pov in a previous chapter; I’m so here for the whole mess that’s Sasuke and the SasuNaru…maelstrom; I desperately want to see where Kiba and Ino end up, how they solve their current situation (if they solve their current situation), and how they heal, individually and potentially together.

Even more desperately: I want Shikamaru’s grief. I cannot describe how much I love reading these dreamscape flashbacks. Getting these small insights into the hidden life they got to live for a little while, it’s incredible. Even more so because we know how it ended. For now, hopefully. Shikamaru watching Naruto, but refusing to see who Naruto was holding… He knows, of course he knows, but like he said in an earlier chapter: they won’t let him grieve. I want his grief, every last ugly heartbreaking bit of it! If you were to write out the scene when Neji’s death caught up to him (cause I’m not sure the moment he died would necessarily be it), my god… I’d pay good money to read that, for real.

And, finally, Genma. I said it before and I’ll say it again, I don’t know how he’s still standing. I want to read when Kakashi first walked away. And I want to read every last letter of them, hopefully, finding their way back to each other. Genma deserved his eight times up. I at least want to see him get his ninth time realised.

Hey sweetie! 💜💖

Thank you so much for carving out the time to leave this message. I'll always reiterate how much it means to receive feedback. I appreciate you doing so. 💖

[...] In other cases I’ve been scared off by being told my reactions and interpretations were wrong, both by writers and other commenters

I'm sorry to hear you felt scared off by responses to your feedback, but I'd definitely encourage you to ignore that. Christ, some of the stuff I've been told about my writing, the tropes I use, the themes I explore...🤦🏻‍♀️ Not everyone's cuppa chai. Even if interpretations were 'wrong' so to speak, the fact that you're engaging with that storyline and the characters is fantastic. I'm sorry if your engagement hasn't been warmly received by writers in the past - I find that baffling and not representative of writers on the whole, who are invariably hungry for engagement and grateful to receive it unless it's a troll comment or angry flame. Gently guiding a reader who may have misunderstood something is different to completely blasting them out the water and if that's been the case for you, then that's rubbish and I hope that me telling you how much your feedback matters will encourage you to share your thoughts with writers you read. You matter. Your engagement matters. What you love matters, as it's invariably what we love too. I'm so grateful you're still here, luv. And I thank you for showing up for me.🫶🏼 💖

I, much to my own surprise, loved reading from Hiashi’s pov in a previous chapter; I’m so here for the whole mess that’s Sasuke and the SasuNaru…maelstrom; I desperately want to see where Kiba and Ino end up, how they solve their current situation (if they solve their current situation), and how they heal, individually and potentially together.

So lovely to know you enjoyed reading from Hiashi's POV. I feel that there's room for a lot of nuance where Hiashi is concerned, rather than him being portrayed as a black-and-white, cold-hearted dinosaur for not changing the Hyūga clan. Digging into his brain (and chest cavity) was a must.

Kiba and Ino 🫶🏼😔

SasuNaru: Watch this space 😏

Even more desperately: I want Shikamaru’s grief. I cannot describe how much I love reading these dreamscape flashbacks. Getting these small insights into the hidden life they got to live for a little while, it’s incredible. Even more so because we know how it ended. For now, hopefully. Shikamaru watching Naruto, but refusing to see who Naruto was holding… He knows, of course he knows, but like he said in an earlier chapter: they won’t let him grieve. I want his grief, every last ugly heartbreaking bit of it!

Oddly enough, Shikamaru wants his grief too. And I'm on what emotional whumpster ride with you. *grabs medicinal liquids*

Funny how HHU began as another of my failed attempts to write a series of one-shots (BtB flashfowards/flashbacks) that just ended up as a timeline skip continuation of the BtB series....my point being the little flashbacks are good fun to write, and might've originally been posted as one-shots (if I wasn't so shit at them). I'm glad you're enjoying these memories.

If you were to write out the scene when Neji’s death caught up to him (cause I’m not sure the moment he died would necessarily be it), my god… I’d pay good money to read that, for real.

Ah damn, I'd need my Angsta guns locked and loaded for that. Ha! Aw. I'd also happily receive said good money to write it too, if only that were legal. 🤣

And, finally, Genma. I said it before and I’ll say it again, I don’t know how he’s still standing. I want to read when Kakashi first walked away. And I want to read every last letter of them, hopefully, finding their way back to each other. Genma deserved his eight times up. I at least want to see him get his ninth time realised.

Ah, Dearly Tortured Genma. 🥹💖 He's been through the absolute wringer. Kakashi walking away was a serious KO to his heart. Damn right you are, Genma definitely deserved his eight times up and I adore that you are invested in him having his "ninth time realised" (love that). I fully support this sentiment. Thankfully so does Raido, or else Genma might've been alone in the fallout...but credit where it's due, he's a tough bastard.

Thank you again, my lovely, for this wonderful feedback! It matters and it impacts. 💖🫶🏼💖

[punkshort]

Why is roommates!Joel so sleazy 🥺 like he’s obvs so in love with reader and he knows he’s hurting her so why on earth would be invite those girls from the supermarket or get off with that lady in the sea 🥺🥺 I know they’re not together but idk if I was reader I’d kick off lmao, what he’s doing is wayy worse than her trying to just date one guy. What do you reckon? Is it him trying to get his mind off of reader? Does he genuinely like these girls? Does he not realise how much he likes reader?? (This isn’t criticism AT ALL btw, I just love hearing character studies from fic writers!!)

Also I desperately need to know what Joel was gonna ask her at the mini golf 😭😭

Thank you for this ask!

So Roommates Joel is quite flawed. He's not going to be like the usual Joel I write (who tends to be fucking perfect, let's be honest). I kind of wanted to write a little different story this time around, and starting in chapter four I think you'll start to see both Joel and reader are flawed and have a lot of work to do 👀

But to answer your question - I think the girls he met at the supermarket was just him being a guy: he was excited he got noticed for his work and he got wrapped up in it, while also trying to ignore the feelings he has for reader (which he was finally forced to confront later that night when he saw reader with Charlie).

The girl on the beach, though, I think he was actually interested in getting to know her. I think when he saw reader with a boyfriend he thought to himself he needed to move on and try to find someone (his mom's words hanging in the back of his head from the Fourth of July, too) but was disappointed when she just ultimately wanted to hook up and wasn't interested in him past that. It also added to the ever growing list of why his job is preventing him from having what he really wants out of his personal life.

I am curious what you guys think Joel was going to ask at mini golf 🤔 I can't decide if I want to tell you yet or not 🤣

[damianbugs]

i know you love the dynamics between bruce and his kids as they are, but alot of it is also due to iffy writing lmao.

in your IDEAL scenario, what would bruce parenting look like? would he still be as abusive as he is in canon? CAN he even change?

the short answer to "can bruce change?" is... no 😭 but let me try and explain!

its not because of who bruce is as a character or batman as a hero, but because it is basically impossible for a popular character like him to have any consistent writing. we've seen it before where he's a great father and mentor for a few issues, and then less than six months later he does something horrific and takes ten steps back in that regard.

it's why this conversation (to me) is a very complicated one, because i can't for sure say who bruce is as a person without taking into consideration the literal decades of almost hundreds of different writers, runs and universes. of course, he has made some terrible and very harmful decisions, but again, so much context is required to truly comprehend those situations. that doesn't remove the fact that he has hurt his children, both accidentally and purposefully.

do i think bruce is a bad dad in canon? no. do i think he is a good dad? also no. depending on where in time you're reading him, who's writing him etc — he acts like completely different people. my head spins trying to come up with a simple answer to this otherwise simple question.

a good example i think is the current zdarsky batman run. arguably some of the best bruce wayne as a father introspection we've had in a LONG TIME, the story doing well to remove the 'child soldiers' narrative that frank miller infamously popularised to main continuity despite it not being from the canon timeline. but who's to say this sort of perspective will last before being completely disregarded by the next writer?

it's no secret i pick and choose what i (personally) view as canon, my own personal bias against Certain writers making me ignore their writing entirely, but i am also not ignorant to the fact that bruce can and desperately NEEDS to improve as a parent.

sorry for rambling but back to your original question about what my ideal parent bruce would like and to that it's two very simple words; honest and communicative.

that's really all he needs to do. almost all his shitty decisions can be linked back to him lying or purposely evading the truth and just refusing to communicate to his children, which in turn makes them not want to communicate with him. this then leads to much larger problems and much more devastating outcomes.

bruce needs to realise that his children don't owe him anything more than the very little he's given them emotionally. this whole "soldier-team" mentality that he adopts when he's batman filters into his dynamics with them as family and as bruce wayne, and that is why he keeps hurting them and not taking responsibility for it.

they should not be vigilantes before they are his children. but to do that, writers also need to make the distinction that batman is also bruce wayne, but that is an entirely different conversation.

again, current batman writing (mark waid batman vs robin, zdarsky batman, ram v detective comics, tom taylor batman etc) seems very promising in giving bruce a chance to be a better father, so we can only hope it continues this way. maybe, we'll even get bruce actually holding himself accountable one day.

i try not to discuss this topic too much because in my experience it's far too nuanced to explain in short text posts on the internet but i hope this answered your questions <3