#realistically tho these people are the types that remember everyone they meet. they always know what’s going on with everyone etc

[isekyaaa]

The closest character to Kokomi in terms of similarities is Alhaitham. They both want to essentially do what interests them the most (read) and be left alone. Both are quite intuitive about understanding and predicting situations and people. The difference is that Kokomi feels a higher level of responsibility over her environment then Alhaitham. She feels more obligated to do what she doesn’t want to do while Alhaitham just cannot be bothered.

[mallowstep]

the nature of folklore

today, i want to talk about the nature of folklore.

we're not divorced from it in the modern day by any means: the nature of folklore is that it is always there.

after all, how many times have you heard that if your roommate dies, you get an a? or listened eagerly to someone's tale of an impossible encounter with an impossible stranger?

folklore is omnipresent. it is woven into us.

that said, we don't have a ton of folklore via stories, oral history, and songs anymore. if i could singlehandedly change that, i would. i grew up telling stories, keeping the history of my family in vignettes i taught to my brother, making up comforting fables for my younger cousins when they couldn't sleep.

my mother sang me lullabies, amazing grace, you are my sunshine, tula tula, melodies i can no longer name but would recognize in a heartbeat.

i went to a summer camp where you were never too old for a bedtime story, where the greatest reward, even for a pack of sixteen year olds, desperately vieing for independence, was to hear another story. i can still tell you the story of the invisible prince, of how such and such and so and so met and married, recount the little prince or hatchet or my side of the mountain in impeccable detail.

unfortunately, i am but one voice, and i don't think i really want to change us back. let culture progress, it is the way of the world.

but i have so many stories for cats. trust me, i have about 20 drafts sitting of stories for these murder cats. but i want to take a moment to talk about how folklore works, what it does, and why it's important.

[3.7k words. 20 minute read. section headers, minimal formatting changes.]

oral history: a written explanation

i'm feeling a bit punny.

anyway, i'm not qualified to talk about oral history. what i am qualfied to do is talk about the broadest sense of it.

oral history is not an accurate way of keeping records. stories change, people forget things, the tales become exaggerated and tweaked.

but...it's not the worst way. it's a real, sincere, history.

for example, in my full moon, it's unlikely that one individual really mastermined this plan. especially not the same individual who sorted out some other important part of skyclan business, which in it of itself is a tall-tale.

realistically, the clans realized they had an error, decided on when they would meet, and just went with it.

but briarleap is one of skyclan's heroes. she's not the only one: rushfoot and dovestar are also important heroes. she fills a particular type of archetype: she's the young hero, who sees the world more clearly than those around her and comes up with a solution.

so it makes sense to assign her to the problems which are clever and had no obvious solution. she's not really a trickster archetype, but she is clever, young, and has no real power within the clan.

in other words, she's a ya novel protagonist.

likewise, the yet-unwritten story of briarleap and swallowpaw definitely didn't happen as it's told. that's just a nice box to put it in, a nice cover for an important lesson: mark unstable branches.

all the clans probably have a similar version of briarleap's story. i can't tell you for sure who the equivalent is, because i don't know, but it's worth remembering that almost none of these cats existed.

i think riverclan's will be a cat named briarstream.

you see what i mean, they're both named briar- because briarleap belongs to no cat. they just have a suffix that corresponds with common clan names.

now, i can't speak for anyone else, but in come back to you one by one, by solacefruit, there's a cautionary tale about catching koi. we get this line:

The koi were left alone because the tall folk loved them. That was the truth of the story. The real truth, not Linnetleaf’s version.

that confirms it, the story is a warning that's been polished into something kinder and more forgiving. (i highly recommend come back to you one by one btw.)

that's how oral history works.

it's not good for having a factual understanding of historical events, but...that's not really the point.

shared stories

another thing is, a lot of clans share the same stories.

i already talked about briarleap/stream/??? for the other clans, but it's more than just that.

every clan is going to claim that they have the right, correct story, that the other clans don't tell it well, etc., but with the exception of clan specific stories, that's not generally true.

okay this is hard to explain bc i'm still drafting/editing a lot of what i'm talking about right now and full moon is kind of a boring story for this. so i'm going to use the story of the long night, because that's the closest to finished and most likely to have been published by the time i finish this.

cw: the long night is a story that involves infanticide and cannibalism. i'm not graphic about it, but it's featured very heavily. we move into discussion at "STORY COMPLETE," and i move on entirely at "SAFE"

okay, so to summarize very briefly, the long night is a story about the seasons and about queen madness. it's one piece of clan creation mythos.

basically, before there were seasons, the night and day just took turns. during the night, everyone slept, but during the day, everything woke. one night, the night doesn't end. i'm telling the thunderclan version, because that's the version i'm working on, but this is a tale from before there were clans, so while every clan says their version is universal, it's definitely not.

there's a queen, slateflower, who has six kits (pigeonkit, harekit, fallowkit, dewkit, ripplekit, and muddykit), who are very young. her mate, silvershadow, has been hunting for her, because there was no clan to provide.

he's able to catch a small amount of prey, but as the night goes on, slateflower just doesn't have enough milk. she knows her kits are going to starve, so she picks the weakest one, kills it, and eats it. when silvershadow returns and asks what happens, she says that muddykit died and she buried her. this repeats itself until only pigeonkit and harekit are left.

silvershadow fails to catch anything, so he comes back, and sees slateflower try to decide who's weaker. he realizes what's happening, takes harekit from slateflower so she doesn't have to decide, and brings the kit into a clearing. he begs the moon to end the night so he can feed his family again.

it takes him a couple times, and he also is searching for another nursing queen. he finds a queen named flamepuddle, who also had a litter of six kits (silentkit, webkit, wildkit, dustykit, beetlekit, and talonkit), as well as taking in the kits of her sister, echofur, (heatherkit, redkit, goldkit, leafkit, cricketkit, and graykit), and right now, only redkit, leafkit, talonkit, goldkit, and cricketkit had survived. (the rest, and her sister, died of starvation.)

flamepuddle agrees to take in harekit, and the night eventually ends.

silvershadow decides that he, flamepuddle, and slateflower will live together. this isn't a thunderclan origin story, mind, just the beginning of collective cat behavior. but one of the reasons it is a distinctly thunderclan edition is because the implication is that later on, the other clans are all splinter groups.

there's also an implication that such large litters used to be more common, à la how in the bible, people used to be more fertile.

so anyway, because all cats are said to be descendents of these nine cats (silvershadow, flamepuddle, slateflower, redkit, talonkit, goldkit, cricketkit, harekit, and pigeonkit — leafkit dies later on), it's said they all carry the trauma of the long night and queens, feeling unsafe, will choose the strongest of their litter.

STORY COMPLETE

so.

in thunderclan's telling, flamepuddle and silvershadow are made to be the heroes, and slateflower is the villain. notice that slate is a windclan name, and the kits who die don't have very thunderclan prefixes. the implication is that this is because the other clans are weaker.

in a riverclan telling, instead of flamepuddle and slateflower, we might have puddlefeather and tallsong, and the kits who survive might be fallowkit and dewkit.

in skyclan, we might have mothpetal and nightstep, with surviving kits echokit and maplekit.

and so on. silvershadow usually keeps his name, tho. or at least half of it.

the 10th cat who dies is also variable. in thunderclan, it's another kit. slateflower is understood to not have intended her actions. in shadowclan, it's the slateflower analogy who dies. in riverclan, silvershadow dies and puddlefeather and tallsong have to work together.

so we always have the same story, but the details of it change, and there's a lot about the clan in that.

it might even be that the reason puddlefeather is able to keep five out of twelve kits alive is because she can fish for herself. tallsong can't.

and this is a story that's supposed to be universal, before the time of clans.

imagine how differnt briarleap and briarstream are. no, seriously, i don't have it in me to do five versions of every folk tale i write, so y'all have to live with one.

anyway, i could go on here, but wow, this section is...much longer than i meant as it is whoops.

SAFE

morals, protagonists, and antagonists

i'm not going to lie, i'm somewhat exhausted from the last section.

basically, the "protagonists" are often the ones who make mistakes. this is because that's a common theme for parables. you want the protagonist, who listeners relate to, to understand the mistakes and learn from them.

there's almost always a moral in these stories. they're not told just to entertain. they're ritualistic, nigh religious, tied in deeply with their culture.

finally, when an opposing clan is needed, (a) the clan telling the story is nearly always in the right, and (b) it tends to shift to whoever the clan is most antagonistic with.

a lot of my stories are shadowclan v skyclan because they have the strongest story-telling development and i don't have any aus planned for shadowclan and (old) skyclan, but i really like what i've developed for them.

in the case a friendly clan is needed, that also tends to shift, but it's less likely to change. it's significantly more likely to change if they're fighting with the clan in the tale.

for this reason, clans tend to be allies with cross territory clans in stories. you're just less likely to fight with someone who's territory you're across from, and you get fun flanking if you gang up on someone in the middle.

characters and archetypes

so i mentioned how briarleap is a certain kind of archetype, and that's pretty common in folklore. you've got your tricksters, witches, wise elders, w/e. i could do a bunch of research into folklore and find a canonized list but i'm approximately 90% sure it's going to tell me it varies by culture so. instead of doing that, i'm going to talk through some of the character archetypes i've been using.

please keep in mind that this is highly suspect to change. also, i'm referring to a lot of cats in my lore posts, so i'm sorry, because if you don't keep up with that, you might be a little bit lost. if you want to check out my folklore, it's here. maybe one day i'll make a kit simulation list that gives them to you in the order a kit would be told them.

the young warrior — characters like briarleap. smart, creative, and willing to speak up when something is wrong. they're who young kits should aspire to be. they're the most common protagonist in stories for young kits, and they're one of the only protagonists for stories with a "good" lead.

cassandra — prophetic characters who struggle to act on their prophecies. goosefeather types. they're cautionary tales, warnings about who not to be, because these are true seers who failed. sometimes, it is framed as the clan being wrong (e.g., berrymoon's main story is about this), but usually it's because the character said too much/too little, at the wrong time, etc.

impulsive apprentice — another warning. characters like swallowpaw. their actions are usually not actually wrong, but they end up being wrong with hindsight. they're tragic characters, and their warnings are usually about the rules established because of them, rather than not being like them.

wise leader/deputy — it's exactly what it sounds like lmao. usually, this is going to be the deputy more than the leader, because the deputy is a far more relatable position than the leader. these are your rushfoots and lilytails, deputies who make quick decisions on the behalf of their clan.

foolish/selfish warrior — warriors who take actions selfishly, which wrap back around to hurt themselves. these are the "protagonists" of the tales about feeding elders and kits first, and so on. they're actually the most common protagonist in stories over all. it's kind of a wide category, including everything from slateflower from "the long night" to lightningcall from "full moon." you know, a queen who only escaped the dark forest because it didn't exist, and a tom whose "mistake" was not showing up to a deputy meeting he was physically unable to attend.

there are, naturally, many more archetypes. there are archetypes for every role in the clan, often many. there's probably some amount of symbolism in the names — perhaps "-leap" is a skyclan indicator of a young warrior, etc., but at least right now, i'm not interested in that. i have more fun naming characters than worrying about the symbolism behind it, because i'm trying to also provide an understanding of clanlife, and that requires bending the rules.

(i mean, for what it's worth, this is true of many things. "the long night" as thrushpelt tells it is not the full version. usually, you wouldn't separate it from "the four seasons," but also, he glazes over the infanticide and cannibalism because he's talking to, like, four-year-olds, explaining how their mother had inherited a trait from slateflower.)

overall, though, i think these five are enough to give you an idea of what the archetypes look like.

interestingly, i also want to call attention to the fact that there's no specific trickster archetype. i mean, there is, because it's (a) one of the most common, and (b) it needs to exist for what i'm about to say, but it doesn't properly count.

see, cats are good at being sneaky and smart and clever. you know this if you have a cat.

clan cats also have to be good at following rules.

so basically every protagonist and antagonist in a story is some permutation of the trickster. the young warrior is the trickster but with less pointless trickery. the impulsive apprentice is probably the closest to straight-up trickster, but there's usually no associated deception. etc.

but in general, all cats should be clever and smart and finding new solutions, so there isn't a specific trickster.

names and times

on a related note, one that's significantly harder to demonstrate, the names of cats get repeated a lot.

in the real world, this is because the names are approximately 75% generated and 25% tweaked, and i have a bias towards certain names.

in the context of lore and worldbuilding, and why i'm not doublechecking against my database of every cat i've ever mentioned, this is because, well, it should make sense for certain elders to tell multiple stories, or, logically, for a kit to grow into a warrior grow into an elder and tell a story.

i mean, dovestar's nine lives are a huge part of skyclan, because each life is supposed to demonstrate some fundamental principle, and they're told over the nine moons of a kit's life (again, cats count kits' lives from the season before they're born for the purpose of holy nine, and from their actual birth for every other purpose, which is how brokenstar got around the warrior code fun fact), so yeah, i'll probably have some repetition in there.

likewise, there's no timeline for these. we don't know what happens when at all, except that the cats telling a story are younger than the cats in the story, and any "book cats" are younger than any other mentioned cat.

(that last point is because exactly one story is told by thrushpelt.)

so anyway, really hazy times and names because...that's how things go m8.

impact of the great journey

so as you can imagine, the great journey is a pretty big deal.

first of all, we're running out of cats who can remember the forest. in thunderclan, according to moonkitti, who i trust in this, birchfall is the youngest cat who can remember it. so considering birchfall could have great grandchildren in the next book or two, i'd say that we're pretty much done with cats who lived there.

even among the other cats, squirrelflight was an apprentice, and she went on the first journey, so there's that. cloudtail and brightheart won't be around for much longer, and graystripe might be immortal, but if he isn't, he'll be gone soon too.

i mean, i know there are non-thunderclan cats, but do you know their names? do you?

yeah. that's what i thought.

anyway, my point is, right now, in canon time, all of the stories are set in the forest. but like, that's kind of not helpful.

who knows, there's probably a story about sunningrocks that just doesn't make sense anymore.

i don't know for sure how the great journey impacts the folklore. this is because there's not an easy way for me to write it. my elders' den stuff is specifically set before tbp, so i don't have to think about adding in the villains of tbp.

why only tbp? because we have 3 wonderful, fantastic, folklore worthy villains. in tnp, we have the journey, in po3, we have interpersonal drama, in oots, we have rehashings of old villains, in dotc nothing matters, in avos, we have weird fuzziness i don't really remember what happened after darktail tbh, and tbc is ongoing. but wait! i hear you saying, what about hawkfrost? and darktail himself? and... no. shut up. they don't matter. just. they're not. they don't. they're not lore villains is what i'm saying very poorly. they're not the kind of villains who inspire lore. maaaaybe darktail? but he was far too recent for folklore.

anyway.

i'm sure in all of the po3 stuff i have on the horizon, i'll explore this more. dovefeather lore is in the awkward middle ground — everything is from the perspective of cats who never knew the old forest, but pretty much everyone older than them does, so it's unlikely anything substantive has changed.

but i have a lot of po3 extended universe plans that might dip in to this?

but for spitballing purposes, what probably happens is that most stories are just reskinned.

things like stories about sunningrocks are going to be repurposed. maybe about that weird strip of territory that they fought over? i'm not sure.

some stories will get to stay in the old forest, like the battle with bloodclan. and some stories will fade out, just as they always do. but for the most part, once the elders didn't live in the forest, they're just going to start plopping stories in the lake.

also, the great journey itself is 100% already folklore. i don't have to do that part, canon actually does it for me. kits are constantly being told about the great journey, or apprentices are telling us they were told about it, or someone is having a weird dream sequence that involves it.

the great journey is a major part of folklore, and that's cool. maybe if i run out of old stories, i'll do some post-canon elders' den stuff. we'll see, i'm definitely not feeling it right now, but that could change.

speaking of great...

this is a minor thing, but like, what's up with all the greats?

the great journey, okay, yeah, sure, makes sense.

and then we have the great battle.

also legit. it had been a while.

and then...the great storm?

look, i understand the storm in bramblestar's storm was a big deal. i have a lot of thoughts about bramblestar's storm as a book and this isn't that. but...

can we compare how many cats died in the great journey and the great battle? and we lost, like, three cats in the great storm

don't get me wrong, i sobbed like a baby when briarlight died.

oh hold on i lied that wasn't this book. never mind never mind.

i just, like, it's very strange IMO to have this great being a thing. or at least, i don't now, i guess it's evolution of culutre?

bluh okay i'm hungry and i do not focus well so i'm going to finish up but just. great. interesting.

conclusion

folklore is a topic i'm really interested in, and i try really hard to think through the consequences of, well, everything i can.

i'm definitely missing a lot of details — specifically, i scratched out my plans for a specific creation myth — but i like the general shape of the lore i'm building up.

[ectonurites]

for the character headcannons ask game, jason and cass?

ALRIGHT ALRIGHT im putting this one under a cut because it got SUPER long bc i cant shut up ever

lets start w jason

A (realistic headcanon): 

ok using the ‘realistic’ category here loosely but GOD i love the idea of Damian & Jason having interacted while Jason was staying with the League before getting dunked in the Lazarus Pit. like. this obviously would need to be set more in preboot and following the Lost Days & Batman Annual 25 version of Jason’s resurrection, but god the idea of it just makes me scream in a good way. Like... these are things Jason likely doesn’t remember very clearly once he’s brought back to life more fully by the pit because he was uh pretty catatonic, but Damian being a little kid and knowing about the boy that his mother keeps around the base, that she’s trying to help bring back to health. Damian not even knowing that’s his big brother, just that he’s a presence that shares his mother’s attention. Jason again being unresponsive but like, ok god you know that part of lost days where Talia shows the others observing him that he only fights back at those he perceives as genuine threats trying to hurt him, 

Because Jason can perceive that she’s safe, she’s not actually trying to hurt him, he trusts her because she saved him? thinking about lil child Damian who is ya know already being trained in fighting stuff and like the idea of him trying to provoke Jason just to see what happens but Jason not fighting back because on some level be it his connection to Talia or even little baby Damian visually reminding him of Bruce, he knows that Damian is safe too 🥺 

and then when Jason and Damian meet again in Gotham as Red Hood & Robin respectively, Jason not really remembering because there was so much going on back then for him, but Damian realizing that oh... that was Him

B (hilarious): 

alright so if we are looking at comics currently, in modern stuff jason is what, like 22? hes old enough to drink in the US but still definitely early 20s so around my around my age, thats what im using as a basis here. if we adjust timeline and still consider his death having happened when he was 15, that puts it around 2013. and then coming back to like interacting with people about three years later if we still kinda base things off of the preboot timeframe (since we never got a super solid retelling of the timeline of death -> resurrection -> training -> tries to get revenge aside from knowing he went to the all-caste instead of the lost days version of the story) making him reenter the regular world and stuff around age 18 in 2016. meaning a solid three years of pop culture that he was entirely missing, and like im sorry but he really doesn’t strike me as the type to bother looking into what he missed, he’s kinda busy focusing on other stuff. lets take a quick look at some major things from those years. 2013 gave us ‘what does the fox say’ and ‘the harlem shake’ . 2014 had that time U2 just put a fuckin album on everyone’s phones, The Fault In Our Stars movie came out. 2015 introduced the phrase ‘Netflix and Chill’ and the whole blue & black vs gold & white dress debate happened. imagine any of the other batkids (or even arguably roy during rhato stuff) bringing these things up and jason’s ensuing confusion. thank you for your time

C (heart-crushing): 

so. there are two specific instances from rebirth era Jason i want to bring up here and much like a lot of these it’s less a headcanon and more of an inference based on observations, but i wanna take a sec to discuss Jason’s relationship with other people’s death. early in rebirth, Tim ‘dies’ from that whole thing in detective comics. he didn’t actually die, we as readers know, but in-universe they all very much so thought he was dead. frustratingly a lot of the batfam wasn’t really shown mourning him aside from in the Detective Comics Rebirth title itself (which just. when a major character dies even if its temporary- that should have a ripple effect) BUT an exception to that is in RHATO 2016, where we get this offhanded comment in Jason’s internal monologuing

similarly later when Roy, who like, had an incredibly close relationship w Jason that had just gotten mended before Heroes in Crisis, gets fuckin murdered in that whole thing... Jason doesn’t go to his funeral either. He leaves a dramatic voice mail and then visits the grave on his own later, choosing to instead keep working on the mission they’d started rather than going and taking the time to mourn properly.

Jason’s relationship with death is incredibly complicated, obviously. He has died, he has come back, and he now is willing to cross the line most other bats won’t and will kill people when he deems it necessary. I think thats something important though- he doesn’t just like... go around killing for fun (usually, some writers preboot made him a little murder happy but even then usually this still was vaguely followed) he kills people he thinks deserved it. Like, even looking back at the mess of Morrison’s Jason during Batman & Robin 2009, Jason was still trying to bring a sense of justice with who he was killing (”punishment that fits the crime”), it wasn’t killing for the sake of killing. He sees things in this kind of almost black and white ‘people who deserve it’ and ‘people who don’t’ way, and he has no problem dealing with death when it’s with the people he thinks deserve it. 

but when someone who doesn’t in his mind ‘deserve it’ gets killed? i think he just goes into total avoidance mode. throws himself into other things he’s doing, tries not to dwell on it too much no matter how much he still thinks about it (this is especially evident in him consistently telling people “i’m fine!” after what happened to Roy, despite bringing Roy up literally like every few issues for a WHILE after he died and very clearly still struggling with it, Artemis is the only one who gets through to him on it a little bit) 

but yeah, I just think that from Jason’s relatively unique situation of having been murdered, he knows what it’s like and he is perfectly fine wishing that on people he thinks are bad and deserve it, but it crushes him to imagine the people he loves and cares about having to experience something as painful as what he went through. not to mention the whole “I came back, why do I get a second chance at all this when they, who are a much better person than I am, probably won’t” mindset we get some implications of him having 

D (canon is a coward and won’t) 

hello DC i am once again insisting a batfam member is bisexual

CASS TIME

A (realistic headcanon): 

ok so we know cass likes ballet. thats canon. however i think we also should in general explore cass experiencing other types of dance/performance as well, be it herself as a performer or even just watching. like... god imagine her & like my brain just automatically for group activities puts her with tim steph and duke but also for this in particular I feel would be a Jason embraced activity, but like them going to see a broadway show or some other professional theatre or something, and her just being enthralled by the reading of body language of the performers! like again by any point in current stuff cass does have like, the ability to speak fine (reading still hard tho) but even so I think like. okay im a theatre kid if that’s not obvious from the Everything About Me but one thing I always do after seeing a show is ya know spend dinner afterwards discussing it with whoever i saw it with.

I just think that like, bringing those people i just mentioned to the table to discuss seeing a show after would be so FASCINATING because cass would bring this whole perspective of critiquing their acting on a whole different level- not based on how well they delivered lines out loud, but by what their body language was saying as they moved on stage. like im very amused by the idea of cass getting a totally different picture in her mind about what a character’s motivations were because she was paying way more attention to what their physicality was saying vs the words that were written and how they were delivered. i think the debates her and the others would have would be EPIC there. jason defending the text as it was written adamantly and cass being like ‘ok yeah sure but thats not what they did’

B (hilarious): 

cass having no concept of money because why would she bother? is SO funny to me. like it’s not that she couldn’t be reasonable if she wanted to, but like, she knows that the Waynes are well off so it’s not something she actually needs to be concerned about, so she just goes hog wild. takes steph out to fancy dinners and makes steph order for them since cass ya know doesn’t really read the menus, and steph’s like ‘jesus christ this costs-” “don’t worry about it” “but cass-” and she just holds up one of bruce’s credit cards and steph’s still like “but you don’t even know the range-” “it is fine”

bruce does not have the heart to tell her to stop

C (heart-crushing): 

i mean this is pretty much canon but especially now after death metal where she’s remembering, not just being told by a guy using weird alternate timeline technology, that she used to be an adopted member of the Wayne family... like that hurts so bad. To look at these people who have ya know been kind to her, Bruce has still been a father-like figure to her (i mean literally from the moment they met in New 52 canon during the flashback in Batman & Robin Eternal, where he’s telling her that she’s not a monster just because of what people forced her to do.... that she’s a hero... that hug.... dad behavior), and they do to some extent treat her as family... But to then really know, to feel and remember that she was actually adopted! She was a part of their family. To look at how she’s been calling herself Orphan while working with them this whole time... that’s so heartbreaking! I have cried about this idea so much! I want so badly a conversation between her and Bruce now where he offers to officially adopt her again, I need it so bad and if it doesn’t happen at some point in the next year or two I will be so distraught.

D (canon is a coward and won’t) 

i want an in-depth exploration of cass’ relationship to her own gender. being raised without language and you know with so much of her life being independent (remember: CASS RAN AWAY AROUND THE WORLD WITHOUT REALLY KNOWING ANY SPOKEN LANGUAGE) and outside of an organized society impressing too much of gender expectations on her, i feel like the way she experiences it would be very unique! like sure she’s so far been fine with being assigned ‘girl’ (ya know that comes with batgirl, and how people just automatically treated her based on how she looks) but in terms of gender expression and like her actual relationship with ‘traditional femininity’ etc like... because of how she was raised I just think she’d have a really different perspective on it that could be cool to explore, and I think she’d fall outside of the binary after she really thinks about how she identifies.

tldr on that: she/they nb cass is what i’m getting at here

[writing-frenzy]

Airplane Crossing Over Plots~

Like it says on the tin, these were ideas I had for crossovers involving our fav writer~ (EDIT: Thank you @guiltycorp for inspiring this a bit XD)

Now, I’ve mentioned before, with Airplane choosing the go home option, he ends up still with a golden core in all this mess but he needs to cultivate his body really carefully because of it. (come on, he put in all the time and effort to be an immortal master, he should be able to still have his bad ass skills; not to mention with it being a soul thing, because a golden core is just as spiritual as it is physical, so he will definitely still have it.)

So, sealing his core and having his Nascent Soul outside his body to relieve some of the pressure on it, (having it look like a little chibi SQH that usually hangs out in hoodie pockets or hiding in Airplane’s hair with an aura of disguise around it), Airplane has to go and actually work out, which isn’t too much of a hardship for him at least, seeing as he’s had years to get into a routine and survival instincts kicking in to help him out there.

And, he may have actually started taking school seriously again, actually applying himself, maybe even getting an online accounting job to help supply his income. When he’s steady with that, he finishes PIDW the way he had been leading up to, the ending that makes the most sense and satisfices the writer the most (and if it gives him some closure, he isn’t saying anything about that.) Now that he is finally free from PIDW, and has college and work to worry about, he writes whenever he damn well pleases, and whatever he wants to fuck what anyone says.

(He might or might not write some absolutely filthy porn whenever the mood hits him, and cackles how his fans both greedily read it and cry because his newer works are so tragic, even if they have happy endings at times. Yes, Airplane Shooting Towards the Sky is a porn writer, but first and foremost is he an angst writer more~ His fan’s tears and cries just make him stronger kind of writer~)

(I just honestly want Airplane to write what he wants to now, that is one of the biggest motives behind all this honestly)

So, we have the set up :D let’s get to what we can cross over here~

First Up: ~Cutivation Group Chat~

Come on, how can one resist this? Plopping good old Airplane into this wild ride is one of the few things that makes me so happy in life. The thought of it makes me grin, especially since it can go two ways in my opinion~

First way: Airplane replaces Song Shuhang; like, just seeing Airplane, who was an Immortal Master and Teacher in those situations would be so funny, yet intriguing as well to see how he handles it, because you know he’ll be able to, just in ways no one ever expects. (Besides, that werid luck of Shuhang’s would be perfect for him, tho he won’t seek death like the other would~ :D Airplane still has a lovely sense of self-preservation~)

Second way: Airplane is one of Song Shuhang’s roommates. (for this, I’m going to say their Dorm was big enough for five peeps, because I want Airplane to have more friends damn-it.) Just... the imagery of the two neutral disasters getting into so much mayhem and hijinxs together, giving Song Shuhang not only a friend/brother in arms he can always depend and rely on, but also a steady source for learning and cultivation as well :D

(Also, Airplane and Gou Moumou being writer friends, the two of them able to bounce ideas on to each other (oh god, now you have inspired me, how dare you make me write this./hahahaha, you know you want too/ bitch turnabout is fair play/ ah fuck.) also: just the image of Airplane meeting Senior White and being completely unaffected because not only is his survival instincts going in overdrive, but also:

Airplane: ? He’s not my type.

Everyone: *jaws dropped*

:D Anyways~

Second Idea: Card Room (Rebirth)

Now First, for those who don’t know Card Room (Rebirth), this is an action/survival/mystery thriller BL Unlimited Flow type of novel; it follows one Xiao Lou, a medical professor who specializes with examining the dead, and his journeys through multiple rooms after having died in reality, the difficulty of each of these rooms measured with Playing Cards from 2 to K and with different types of rooms being sorted by their suits of Hearts (Mystery), Diamonds (Puzzle), Spade (Survival), Club (Luck/Money). The Goal of the story is to beat all the rooms and return back to the world of the living once more. To aid in this, people can get special cards to help them fight/ take care of their health/ or even just daily life essentials to be able to actually get through places. 

So... this means after getting all used to living once more and getting into his grove in the modern world... Airplane unfortunately kicks the bucket, yet again! Thing is, this time it happened after he played a card game with some of his roommates, I’m going to say poker, and they were betting who would do what chores. Aiplane managed to make out pretty well, and was pleased with it, so was very much bummed when he ended up dying yet again.  He goes through the room, some by the skin of his teeth, but with his cultivation abilities still usable (can’t stop something on a soul level here) he gets by okay. Though, all his cards either deal with writing, supplies, and the rare cultivation one at times.

He gets by at least.

Now, because this series gives me some emotions, here is one thing I will say: Airplane and Liu Ying end up partnering up and break through together, because damn it, Liu Qiao and her sis deserve some damn happiness ;-; Maybe Airplane and Liu Ying meet by chance, Airplane impressed by the young woman’s intelligence and Liu Ying can in turn be grateful for Airplane’s resourcefulness. Maybe even include the original girl that Liu Ying teamed up with, So we have three people already in your team to survive! (because surviving the rooms 2-4 is already damn amazing considering how hellish they get :D ) 

This is a fun crossover for me to imagine honestly, because it would be perfect to showcase Airplane’s skills in logic, reasoning, and pure survival our boy is known for; let that resourceful and logistic riddled mind out to play as he fights to get the fuck out of this world, even if The City of the Moon is beautiful and all.

:D So, those were the ideas I would like to really see, but here is some more for anyone curious:

Honorable Mentions: These are ones I would love to see Airplane accidently going into, and just going yikes, or nope! or even ‘Really?’

Lord of End of World:

... This story, it concerns me greatly; I like the worldbuilding, even has a few really cool girls in it, and I find the protagonist rather curious (to an extent, blackened Gary Stu that he is...) but does it make me cringe at times with the underage theme to it; it’s part of their cultivation and all, but god damn does the way this story push some of it really sqink me out, I had to drop it because it made me so uncomfortable, so just a heads up there. this is one of those stories that makes me want to write spite fiction, but also make me cringe at the thought of remembering it at times.

Anyways, so, how it boils down to it is that this poor guy, known as the Young Master of the Unground Palace, was abused in all the ways one can practically be abused, just so their Master can get stronger themselves by forming the perfect cauldron to absorb, but who manages to kill their master only to die as well. He ends up transmigrating into Gong Lixin, a 16 year old wealthy young master about a year (I believe) before the apocalypse happens... (Like I said, I have so many damn issues with this damn story, I cry.)

Just, on one hand, imagining Airplane in this world also makes me laugh (and maybe hope), because maybe here Gong Lixin could actually learn a cultivation style thats not only suited to him, but also doesn’t need him to dual cultivate all the time and rely on cauldrons (maybe get some needed therapy as well, Airplane knows some peeps; I can dream~), he can have a stable, reliable teacher here who will have no lust or attraction to him, Airplane helping the kid out at first because they look like they’re recovered from a really bad Qi-Devitation and the teacher in him can’t leave that alone. Airplane can also relate with the youth about transmigrating, maybe even telling him about his own time with that. (And Airplane can use his own cultivation to smack around any bitch looking sideways at his student, because fuck that shit, he is only seventeen and traumatized.) Just, turning this story into a cute mentor and discipleship and emotional healing would make me so happy.

Monster Inn Rectification Report

So, this is another Transmigration story~ MC transmigrates as a poor canon fodder son, who would have ended up in a vegetable state after being neglected in favor of the super amazing awesome adopted son. He then goes on to accidently inheriting a supernatural end for Monsters~

Like, this idea makes me grin evilly; though things will change up a bit, since both of Airplane’s parents have already split up and have their own families? Just, the Former An Ding Peak Lord running an Inn? :D Building it from ground up from bascially nothing? :D Oh, man, this man has run worse things, and even a Demon Kingdom, he got you~

Supernatural Movie Actor App

Its a BL about a guy with a split personality who does realistic (as in for real) horror movies through an app, to get his wish to come true.

This actually goes really good with my idea of Airplane wanting to be an actor and all, only to have his dreams crushed :D He doesn’t at first realize what he is getting into when he gets the app, thinking it might be a chance for him to still be able to do his dream, only, surprise, surprise, he ends up entering a real life Horror movie environment~ I’m really curious about what he would dream about~

I Have Medicine

:D Airplane and Gu Zuo interactions make me smile~ these two would be so fun, seeing them bounce off each other would be a treat.

So What if You’re Reborn

.... hahahahahaha, oh, the chaos that could be unleashed in this timeline would be glorious~

Running Away From the Hero

:)

[angieschiffahoi]

do you think any gay ship will happen on the show? the producer was really selling it tho, saw some stuff on twt. but i honestly doubt they actually will

I’ve read some of the interviews and I see how anyone would be skeptical. I mean, they did what everyone does in these cases: tease a possibility without giving away too much. Which is better than saying “Yes!” and then just... not doing it.

Ava is too good to pass up as a bi lead in my opinion. Teen shows are about to lose Clarke and if these people are smart enough, they’ll know gays tend to flock and migrate.

BUT:

There’s a fundamental problem, regarding the main characters as they are now: they’re very religious (except Ava) and they have taken the vows (except Mary) and that means abstinence, gay or straight. So, unless they are a different type of nuns and they’re not the “married to Jeaus” type, I don’t see neither Beatrice nor Lilith ending up in relationships (Ava & Mary could though), unless they renounce their vows (which is totally accepted by the Church). I don’t see Beatrice doing that. BUT in case we find a way for them to have relationships, I’m going to talk about two scenarios I see possible, the first I think is more realistic than the second:

- Beatrice is going to get a girlfriend and Ava is going to get a boyfriend (I doubt they’re bringing JC back, since he wept like a little baby when the Tarask attacked and she just ditched him). The good part about this show is that we do have Beatrice, who is canonically gay. So, if we put aside the fact that she’s a nun (and that could happen in a number of ways), she could get a love interest that is female besides Ava. But let’s remember that having carnal relationships while being a member of the Catholic clergy, especially nuns who are litterally married to Jesus (and therefore God), equals to cheating.

- The writers realize that Ava & Beatrice have a really strong chemistry, that fans have picked up and are interested in seeing. Having the main character be canonically bi and in a gay romance (in the long run) wouldn’t cost them that much, since they probably alienated half of the super-religious fanbase anyway, with all of the swearing and, well, the blasphemy. This show treats Catholicism as fantasy realm and I’ve seen nuns lose their shit for waaaaay less.

One thing that makes me believe they do not have a fixed idea on Ava’s possible love story with a guy as epic and endgame (maybe, idk, a prophet, an angel, a demon etc.) is the fact that they dropped the JC storyline after the first few episodes. It wasn’t a love story and Mary shoves it in Ava’s face after three minutes of her ditching his scarred-for-life arse. The first four episodes were always about Ava and her journey to find herself - she didn’t want to be a warrior nun, she just wanted to have fun and they showed us that. They looked like the stereotypical endgame hetero romance (meet cute, star crossed, eloping, etc.), but then they all just dropped that storyline so fast, by the end I forgot it existed in the first place. And if they have something else planned, they would’ve hinted at it, but I get the feeling that they want to focus on characters and not romance (or they wouldn’t have made a show about nuns!).

So, yeah. I can see something happening in the future, but they need to solve some things first. I am not sure Beatrice is ever going to renounce her vows (since she is so respectful of the Church and its rules, but also feels like she has a great amount of Faith) and that could be a problem. But Adriel made a whole point about Catholicism being fake, so either he was bluffing or Bea can get a chance at non-platonic love through the plot itself.

[I haven’t read anything about the comics, so I don’t know if some of my questions get answered in them or if the nuns get love interests, because they are different than ‘normal’ nuns]

[snkpolls]

SnK Episode 61 Poll Results (for Anime Only Watchers)

The poll closed with 164 responses. Thank you to everyone who participated!

Please note that these are the results for the Anime Only Watchers’ poll. If you wish to see the results for the Manga Readers’ poll, click here.

Anime only watchers, beware of spoilers if you venture over to the manga readers’ poll results.

---

RATE THE EPISODE 142 Responses

Episode 61 received even better reception than episode 60 did for anime only viewers, with all votes leaning 3-5 on the rating scale, none of our respondents seemed let down by the episode! 

AMAZING!! not action heavy this time, but the information i gained  was a big insight on what’s to come! lots of things are gonna go down and i’m s c a r e d. ready for next sunday 😈🔥

It was fire 

I really loved this episode, better than the last episode. Animation quality was on par with movie quality. MAPPA is giving us their best, ALL HAIL MAPPA.

1 word. Awesome

I love the pacing on this episode and the small details in it. 

Give me more!!!

bruh

WHICH OF THE FOLLOWING WAS YOUR FAVORITE SCENE/MOMENT? 142 Responses

Reiner monologuing about the 104th at the dinner table took front and center seat this week with 43% of viewers favoring this scene the most. Trailing behind, 16.9% enjoyed the scene where Reiner meets up with the Warrior Cadets, and 9.9% enjoyed seeing the human forms of the Cart and Jaw titans for the first time.

WE FORGOT TO ASK LAST WEEK D: WHICH OF THE FOLLOWING SCENES/MOMENTS FROM EPISODE 60 WAS YOUR FAVORITE? 142 Responses

Last week, the highest percentage of people (at 30.3%) enjoyed Reiner’s, “I’m sick and tired… of walls.” 19% favored the scene of Zeke’s scream turning Eldians into titans. 17.6% were most hyped up over Reiner and Galliard wrecking Fort Slava.

MAPPA WENT ALL OUT WITH THE CINEMATOGRAPHY IN THIS EPISODE. WHAT DID YOU THINK OF THE CINEMATIC PANS AND ROTOSCOPE ANIMATION? 142 Responses

Overall, 75.4% of the total vote went in favor of the animation this week, with 33.8% of viewers stating they felt as though they were watching a movie, 32.4% enjoying the fluidity, and 9.2% enjoying the upgrade from the stiffer animation in the previous season. 10.6% felt the rotoscoping and cinematic shots were a little too over the top for an anime, and 10.6% are indifferent. A small handful aren’t enjoying the cinematic animation at all. 

Hated the rotoscope, loved everything else.

It was a bit off-putting at first but I've grown to really like it

it was different but i liked it! it was cool. reminded me of some anime movies i’ve seen, though unique in it own sense

Thought it was great and fluid just at some points like the scene with udo on the docks felt a bit choppy.

Beautiful work, it honestly felt like I was watching a movie. From cinematography to shot framing to the animation. A dialogue heavy episode felt exciting, which is amazing.

I really liked the animation

The animation is so glowy

NOW THAT WE’VE GOTTEN TO HEAR A LITTLE MORE OF THE NEW OST TRACKS, HOW DO YOU FEEL ABOUT THE SOUNDTRACK SO FAR THIS SEASON? 142 Responses

People are overall enjoying the new music so far, with 41.5% feeling it really compliments the change in atmosphere and 35.9% REALLY enjoying the songs and finding their usage very good. 9.9% feel they’re just ok while 7.7% miss the music being composed solely by Sawano. A smaller handful aren’t enjoying the new music.

They DEFINITELY bring the right vibes lol. again, different, but i like it!

HOW DO YOU FEEL ABOUT THE CLOSEUP OF ZEKE’S MOUTH? 141 Responses

In our first of a series of unnecessary crack questions, 31.9% find Zeke’s mouth closeup to have been pretty cool animation. 24.8% are very concerned about Zeke’s treatment of his lungs (do shifters get lung damage?). 20.6% didn’t care about Zeke’s mouth at aoo, while 14.2% would welcome a smooch from him. A handful of people just think it’s gross, lol.

Fucking hate zeke smh 🙄

He smokin a spliffy 😂 not no ciggy 

what chapstick using??lmao.  it was a cool scene

WHAT’S YOUR OPINION ABOUT ELDIAN ASSES? 140 Responses

Eldian asses didn’t turn out to be too controversial, with the majority (42.1%) just wanting to know the details of Zeke’s secret ass wiping technique. 10.7% just think Eldian asses are neat, and another 10% are more enthusiastic about some nice Eldian asses. 25.7% are confused about the question’s inclusion, and 11.4% don’t understand why this was asked at all.

DO YOU WANT REINER TO GIVE YOU A HEAD PAT? 140 Responses

In a close race, 42.1% of respondents would be thrilled to get a nice head pat from Reiner! 41.4% apparently don’t, and just wanna know what the heck the pollsters are smoking while writing up these questions. 11.4% do NOT want Reiner head pats. :(

ZEKE SEEMS TO BE KEEPING HIS ROYAL LINEAGE A SECRET FROM MARLEY DESPITE HIS LOYALTY TO THEM. ANY IDEAS WHY YOU THINK HE IS? 139 Responses

Zeke, the “wonderboy” (as General Calvi puts it) who sold out his own parents, has never been doubted by Marley in terms of his loyalty. Yet, for some reason he seems to be keeping his royal bloodline a secret from them. When we asked why that is, over half of respondents (56.1%) state that they are suspicious of Zeke and his real motives, believing that he is plotting something under Marley’s nose. 25.2% feel that he doesn’t want them to know he’s royal so that they can’t abuse his power, and 12.9% think he simply doesn’t let them know so that they won’t kill him. 

I forgot he was royal 

maybe they will force him to continue the bloodline through children, or maybe he will get used or killed

Well if they dont know hes got a hereditary advantage over both his predeccesors and succesors, he'll always be recognised as the best beast titan and heaps better than my boy Colt.

WE LEARNED IN THIS EPISODE THAT FALCO’S LAST NAME IS “GRICE.” DO YOU THINK THIS WILL HOLD ANY SIGNIFICANCE? 139 Responses

32.4% of respondents don’t remember anyone named Grice. To recap, “Grice” is the name of the person who recruited Grisha Yeager into the Restorationist group, and is the one who was kicked off the wall for the restorationist titans to chase after once they were transformed by Marley. For those that did remember this seemingly random person, 52.2% feel that this relation will be brought up again and have importance to the story, and 12.9% feel it doesn’t really mean anything other than being a neat little detail. 

I feel like you asking this implies that there’s something to it

Not sure yet. But, Falco and Colt seem to be really caring and aware of how the Marlyeans treat Marly-Eldians (at least compared to the other warrior candidates). Also, when we saw their parents they seemed kind too, showing lots of concern for Colt. Maybe they learnt what the former restorationist/other Grice was doing and his cause of death and sent their kids to the warrior program for the same reason Grisha and Dina did Zeke? My bet is Colt & Falco are the restorationist Grice's nephews?

YOUR REACTION TO THE CART TITAN BEING A CUTE WOMAN? 140 Responses

Pieck deserves a colorful pie chart, and she got one! 25.7% say she’s best girl, 22.9% think she’s utterly adorable. 13.6% of viewers already knew about Pieck before getting to this point and were unsurprised. At a tie, 11.4% of voters think that it’s amazing, or they were shocked to find out that the quadrupedal nightmare titan is really just a short, cute woman.

I worked it out last episode since the armbands appeared to indicate the 'type/status' of Eldians, but I was a bit surprised last episode I thought from the trailer the red bands may be special lineages i.e. Ackerman, Oriental clan, and Riess/Fritz. Still think she may be from the oriental clan though since the only characters we've seen with a similar appearance to her are Mikasa and her mother.  

she kinda shawty 👀 but she looks scary too

WE WERE FORMALLY INTRODUCED TO MORE CHARACTERS THIS WEEK, SO WE WILL ASK AGAIN… WHICH NEW CHARACTER IS YOUR FAVORITE SO FAR? 143 Responses

Last week, Falco was the most favored of the new cast with only 40% of the vote. This week, he shoots up over 10 percentage points, with 50.3% of viewers feeling the most positively toward him. Pieck comes in second with 17.5% of the vote, and Gabi is hanging on with just 12.6% of the vote. Colt and Galliard are trailing just a little bit more behind them. 

Gabi best girl

WHAT ARE YOUR THOUGHTS ON THE FATE OF YMIR? 144 Responses

While we did get teased about Ymir’s fate in Season 3, seeing the scene in full can definitely have more of an impact. 37.5% of respondents have accepted the notion of Ymir dying, and feel that it was a decent end for her character, all things considered. 22.9% are in complete and total anguish over her fate, and 20.1% are simply just disappointed and had hoped to see more of her. A very small percentage think that this is actually a red herring, and that Ymir is somehow still alive somewhere.

Already saw this in season 3

Appropriately grim and realistic given what lengths Marley will go to in order to protect themselves 

I am in so much pain please euthanize me that’s my wife

i didn’t really like her anyway so it’s fine(but it was still a bit sad) 

Kinda hate crimey considering shes the only OUT (@jean) charcter. Nah jk. Like wasnt shocked tho coz we saw Galliard last ep

Let's fucking GOOOOOO

Galliard will NEVER replace Ymir, I already hate his bitch ass

So Galliard really is a replacement scrappy eh? I already hate him JUST for that.

TURNS OUT THAT GALLIARD IS MARCEL’S BROTHER. DO YOU THINK THIS WILL BE SIGNIFICANT? 143 Responses

Over half of respondents (52.4%) believe that Galliard’s relation to Marcel will have significance at some point. 32.9% think that it might, but don’t want to say either way. A small percentage feel it’s just a detail that won’t matter. 12.6% have completely forgotten who Marcel is (to refresh your memory, Ymir ate him before RBA attacked the walls).

DO YOU THINK THE MAN WEARING THE ARMBAND INCORRECTLY WILL BE IMPORTANT? 144 Responses

At 73.6%, the majority of viewers are eyeing the random amputee soldier who Falco briefly helped out, believing that he will be important in some manner moving forward. 13.9% believe that it’s just a random soldier, and the scene maybe meant more in terms of showing Falco’s kindness. 12.5% aren’t sure what to make of the amputee soldier at all.

LAST WEEK, WHEN ASKED WHO WILL INHERIT THE ARMORED TITAN, THE MAJORITY PICKED FALCO. AFTER THIS EPISODE, WHO DO YOU THINK WILL INHERIT THE ARMORED TITAN NOW? 143 Responses

Falco is still the most favored to inherit the Armored Titan from Reiner with the percentage of people believing he will jumping from 37.6% to 48.3%. 21.7% are still confident that Gabi will ultimately be the one who gets to eat Reiner. 28.7% believe that neither of them will inherit Reiner’s titan at all.

DO YOU THINK THAT REINER REALLY BELIEVES THE PARADISIANS ARE DEVILS? 143 Responses

The overwhelming majority of respondents don’t believe that Reiner really means what he says when he calls the Paradisians “savage, heartless devils.” Only a small percentage feel he does really means what he says, and a handful of others aren’t sure.

HOW DO YOU FEEL ABOUT REINER WITH WHAT WE’VE SEEN IN THIS ARC SO FAR? 143 Responses

The majority of viewers feel very positively about Reiner and are enjoying seeing more of him, with 46.2% stating that Reiner is really starting to grow on them, while 26.6% already liked Reiner from the start. 18.2% are beginning to feel more empathy for Reiner, although they still aren’t huge fans, and a smaller percentage don’t like him and haven’t been swayed by the narrative as of yet. 

Always seemed like there was lots to him, enjoying the furthered development into his psyche :) 

he’s so hot omg. i feel so terrible cause he’s clearly suffering from ptsd and his disorder too. he seems torn. i do like how he is playing a major role so far. 

I’m in love with Reiner and always have been

Meh

Reiner became 1000% hotter after his life fell apart

REINER AND GABI ARE REVEALED TO BE COUSINS. THOUGHTS? 142 Responses

36.6% of respondents were genuinely shocked to learn that Gabi and Reiner are cousins. 21.8% feel more invested in Gabi’s character arc after knowing this information. 19% were already spoiled on this, and 15.5% don’t really care about it at all. 

Kinda thought she wanted to fuck her cousin lmao

Makes me horrified how casually they talk abt eating Reiner

They had the same last name so I figured they must have had some relation.

Yee haw

GABI QUESTIONS REINER AFTER HE TALKED ABOUT THE 104TH, ASKING IF PEOPLE ON PARADIS WERE ALL BAD. DO YOU THINK SHE CAN OVERCOME HER BRAINWASHING TO SEE THAT PARADISIANS AREN’T EVIL? 143 Responses

The majority think that there is a possibility for Gabi to see things from a new perspective over time. 40.6% aren’t completely sold on it yet, but also believe that it’s within the realm of possibility. 32.9% are very confident that this is the direction her story arc is going to take, and 26.6% think that nothing will be able to undo years of brainwashing for her.

THE TYBURS ARE SAID TO BE AN AFFLUENT FAMILY THAT HOLDS THE WARHAMMER TITAN, BUT HAVE NEVER BEEN INVOLVED IN ANY CONFLICT. WHY WOULD THEY WANT TO GET INVOLVED NOW? 139 Responses

While we still don’t know much about the Tybur family, we thought we’d check in and see what preconceived notions viewers may already have about them. 27.3% believe the Tybur family feel the same as Marley and see Paradis as a threat. 30.2% think that the only reason they’d want to get involved in the conflict is if they get something about it. 41.7% think that the Tyburs are super sus and ultimately will have their own agenda for attacking Paradis. 

They got the good life already, why battle?

WITH AN ATTACK ON PARADIS BEING IMMINENT, HOW DO YOU THINK REINER WILL REACT WHEN HE RETURNS TO THE ISLAND? 139 Responses

We’ve seen Reiner struggle over the weight of his sins in previous seasons, with Ymir even pointing out that he has developed a type of “split personality” to cope with the horror he forced onto the people of Paradis. With the prospect of returning to the island, we asked how you think Reiner will handle the situation. With the highest percentage, 32.4% of respondents feel that Reiner’s mental state will make him completely ineffective if he returns to Paradis. 28.8% think he may even completely switch back to his “soldier persona” once he faces his former comrades again. 26.6% believe that he will keep himself together and stay focused on the mission handed to him. 9.4% think he will find a way to avoid going back altogether. 

Honestly, don't know.

I wouldnt say ineffective, probably just ina daze of sorts. Like hes not fully in the moment.

Idk if he is even gonna go

Not Sure

I hope my boi Reiner makes it through!

REINER FLASHBACKS NEXT WEEK! ARE YOU EXCITED TO FINALLY GET THE WARRIORS’ BACKSTORY? 142 Responses

The vast majority are happy to be finally getting the Warriors’ backstory in the next episode, with 69% feeling overwhelmed with excitement about it, and 19.7% just happy to finally be getting to this point. A smaller percentage don’t really care about learning their backstory and a handful of people are actually dreading it. 

I loved the baby warrior flashback and can’t wait for next week.

ON A SCALE OF REINER TO ZEKE, HOW EAGER ARE YOU TO GET BACK TO PARADIS? 141 Responses

While there is a handful of people who are enjoying the new perspective and getting to know these new characters in Marley, the majority of viewers are (unsurprisingly) eager to see what’s going on with the original cast after the 4 year time skip and the cliffhanger at the ocean in season 3. A message from manga readers: we know your pain, just hang in there!

This arc isn't really doing it for me. The story is only interesting when it focused on the 104th.

If their goal is to make me sympathize with the Warriors it ain't working, I frankly don't give a crap about their sob stories and want to see Eren and friends wreck shit for them

ADDITIONAL THOUGHTS ON THE EPISODE?

Animation and graphics quality is amazing. The sea was CGI too which feels a bit too detailed compared to other things. The plot and vibe is amazing. I like the WW2 style of things. There are so many interactions coming just the thought makes me hyped up. I can easily rewatch it and notice new details and i enjoy it too. Feels really packed and intense.

Solid, loved the animation props to MAPPA, cant wait to see Reiner's character development.

Kinda just people walking around with HELLA ptsd.  Overall kinda vibey Very reminiscent of seas 3 part 1. I will say kinda tgf about these knew kids accept Colt, just wanna see the ogs and Jeans side part. I also HATE Reiner but.........dare I say.....he's growing in me???? Not gabi tho 

Great episode, the trailer's beginning to make a lot more sense now. I didn't expect that guy with the long blonde hair declaring Eren as the enemy (from the trailer) to be part of the Tybur family (maybe I'm wrong here but he looked identical to one of the Tybur family members in the photo Zeke showed.) I assumed he was maybe the Marley leader haha. I think he may be the warhammer titan but it's hard to tell at this point. Regarding the Tybur family, another curious thing is how they are celebrated internationally not just domestically for their help during the great titan war. I am curious whether Marley only treat the Tybur family well because if they didn't that would create issues globally? It seems like the Tybur's have lots of power. But, I wonder if the war hammer titan will be a letdown... I thought it would be the 'big boss' of the titans but after learning that titan doesn't go through training like the other titan shifters and never fought I feel like it's a 50/50 on whether the shifter will be strong or not... I also feel like the guy Falco spoke to was Eren, and this could hint at Eren noticing and possibly trying to indoctrinate Falco? and he was possibly watching Reiner talk to the kids? That was probably Pieck though. Curious how Pieck's father was shown but not mother, he also didn't look like he was from the oriental clan maybe we have another Mikasa on our hands (half Ackerman/Oriental clan) that would be cool, maybe a little bit fanservicey tho.

I like that the focus is on world building right now

I’m just so excited to see what’s coming next

It was friggin awesome but I’m curious on who fell off the roof 🤔

Who is the guy who jumped and died ? :(

WHERE DO YOU PRIMARILY DISCUSS THE SERIES? 138 Responses

Thank you again for participating! We’ll see you again next week!

[yuthoe]

aaa okay so looked at the rules and could you do their idol crush admitting that they’re their type but with yuto, wooseok and kino? 🥺

HELLO, I FINALLY DID IT, SORRY FOR THE LONG WAIT.It’s almost 4AM here and I wanted to get this out in case I become unproductive again when I wake up. I was halfway through Kino’s part when I realized the reader should be gender-neutral, oops. It’s too late for me to edit it again right now, so it’s gonna stay like that. I’ll take care next time, tho.

WARNINGS: none. WORD COUNT: 842, 971, 632.

—

Yuto

“Yuto-ya,” Hui called from his spot on his tiny couch in Yuto’s studio. It’s one of his rare days-off, but he isn’t in the mood to go into the city, and staying in the dorm is too boring since everyone else is busy with their other stuff. So he just decided to tag along with Yuto to his studio and listen to him make some songs. He might even sneak in a nap or two since he hasn’t been sleeping well later—but all thoughts of sleep fly out the window as soon as he sees on his phone a newly uploaded video starring you, known in Pentagon as Yuto’s crush. “Yuto-ya, come here!” he says, tossing the stuffed teddy bear at the boy sitting by the computers.

The toy hits Yuto square in the head and he jumps, turning the seat around in confusion. “What is it, hyung?”

Hui turns the phone so the screen is visible to Yuto. “Isn’t this Y/N?”

A quick glance and, yes, it’s you. Yuto likes to think he can find you in a crowd, no matter how many hairstyle changes you gave or how much you try to blend in with your clothes, but that just comes off kind of creepy. He has watched a lot of your interviews; and you have a lot of them, being a big figure in a famous idol group. He’s just so captivated by your range, your stage presence… It just gets him breathless whenever he sees you perform.

Your group is in the middle of a comeback right now, and Yuto has been religiously keeping up with any promotional material for your group that’s been coming up, but he’s just been super focused on his music today that the only thing that shocked him out of the haze was the teddy bear thrown at his head. Yuto stares at the tiny phone screen for a second longer before getting off the office chair and squishing beside Hui on the couch that isn’t really made for someone of his size.

The video continues playing as his leader turns up the volume. Your group is sat on swivel bar chairs in a white studio set. Gosh, you look radiant, as always. The pleasantries are over and the topic has gone to the announcement your company made about being able to date openly. Yuto isn’t lying that there was a tiny spark of hope that lit up inside him when he first heard of the news. But of course, that was just wishful thinking, since he doesn’t think you actually know him anyway. Sure, you may have heard of Pentagon the group, but there isn’t as big a chance of you taking an interest in him.

Being seated on the farthest chair from the hosts, your answer is saved for last. The other members of your group dodged the question by saying they weren’t really looking to date anyone or dropping names like J.Seph from KARD or Vernon from Seventeen being their ideal type of guy. You take a second or two more to think about your answer and say, “I’d like to get to know Yuto from Pentagon more.”

“Oooohhh,” the hosts exclaim. “He’s one of the rappers isn’t he?” one of them asks.

“Yes,” you say politely, smiling. Yuto isn’t sure if you’re actually red in the face or if that’s just the blush on your cheeks. “I really like the flow of his raps, and his voice is really nice.”

“Ahh, so you’re saying you like tall guys, yes?” the other host teases.

You laugh, slightly embarrassed. “I guess? I don’t really have a type, but Yuto was the first person to pop into my head who I am really interested in and would like to get to know.”

The hosts nod in approval, and your group members seated around you slap you playfully for admitting something like that.

Hui releases a high-pitched siren sound and playfully slaps Yuto playfully on the arm with his free hand. “Do you hear that, Yuto? Seems they like you, too. I wonder if we can go to one of their recordings for this comeback, hmm… Or maybe if our comebacks coincide you can talk to them then, huh?...” Hui continues to rattle off possibilities of Yuto getting into contact with you.

Meanwhile Yuto is still staring at the screen, frozen. The video continues to play, but he isn’t registering anything. Did you really just say, out loud, with a mic on, that you want to get to know him more? Like, he isn’t hallucinating that? Those words really came out of your mouth?

His chest is tight. It burns, but it’s also light. Yuto can’t put into words the feeling. Your sentiments are intangible, and there weren’t even any promises of actually going through with meeting up or exchanging numbers…

But it made him giddy. Indescribably happy.

He lets slip the tiniest of smiles as he continues watching the video and Hui mutters to himself about possible get-togethers with your groups.

Kino

It’s been a habit of Kino lately to listen to podcasts when he gets back to the dorm, as a way to unwind after a busy day. Not because he listens to them (although he does find time to listen and pay attention some other time), but the sound of amicable voices in the sometimes empty dorm is a comforting presence.

One of the podcasts he’s been listening to lately is called Ladies’ Room. His sister told him to listen to one of the episodes, and he found the discussions fun and educational, so he decided to just follow it and he’s updated with the latest one. So when a notification pops up on his phone about a new episode with a special guest, he immediately blasted it on his Bluetooth speaker.

“Hey, guys! This is Soo Ri and you’re listening to Ladies’ Room,” the host’s voice, like a droplet of water falling into a crystal clear puddle, slithers out from the speaker. “Today, we’re talking about love and relationships with a very special guest… idol-slash-actor-slash model, Y/N!”

“Hello, everybody!” you say, in a sweet cadence like a breeze rustling windchimes.

Kino almost drops the container of microwavable tteokkbokki he’s holding and looks at his phone, scandalized, as if it personally offended him. Obviously, it wouldn’t be a stretch for you to guest in podcasts, and even less of a stretch for you to guest-host this particular podcast, but Kino is still surprised. He can’t deny that it feels nice to know that he found you so unexpectedly.

Kino can’t remember when he started taking an interest on you. There was just one time when everytime he turned on the TV he would see your face—in a commercial, a variety show, a drama, that he finally decided to check you out. And from the first music video he clicked, he was hooked on you. Your way with words, your voice, your personality all just made him really want to know you more.

He doesn’t call it a crush, although to Yuto and Wooseok, the only two other people who know about his fanaticism, it comes off that way in droves. He shakes his head and finally unfreezes, putting the tteokbokki in the microwave to heat up. His ears automatically pick up the conversation.

“I know you must be really annoyed and fed up by questions like these, since I watch a lot of your interviews and the hosts ask about it a lot,” Soo Ri begins. “But what’s your stance on ideal types—like your ideal guy, or girl—and do you have one yourself?”

“Aahh, yeah, I do get questions like that sometimes, but they’re in different contexts, so I don’t really mind them.” Kino thinks that’s a polite answer and mentally claps. He hears you take a deep breath before saying, “I don’t think having an ideal type is realistic, though. I mean, that’s what ‘ideal’ means: it’s your idea of perfection, the best. I guess it could be like a blueprint for what you want in a partner, but I don’t think it’s possible for you to be able to tick off all those boxes.”

“Oh, yeah, I get what you’re saying. That’s a really good point.”

“As for my ideal type…” You hum, seeming deep in thought, but not enough to cause dead air. “It’s not really an ‘ideal’ type,” Kino can almost hear the air quotation marks when you said the word and it makes him smile, “but Kino from Pentagon has a lot of the qualities I like in someone.”

By now, Kino had taken his food from the microwave and taken a bite. He freezes with a mouth stuffed with tteokbokki. The spicy soup stinging his lips assures him that he is definitely awake and definitely not dreaming. Did she just—?

“Yeah,” he hears, desperately trying to tune back into the conversation. “He has a very bubbly and fun personality. He’s humble and loves his members and his fans. He’s also very good at what he does—I’ve listened to some of his stuff on SoundCloud, and they’re really good,” you say, and Kino thinks he should probably start chewing before he chokes on the rice cakes. “I mean, his dancing is excellent, his voice is so nice, and he’s also super cute.”

At this, you and Soo Ri both laugh conspiratorially, as if sharing a secret only between you two, as if this podcast isn’t going to be uploaded somewhere anyone who has access to the Internet can listen to, somewhere Kino can access at a moment’s notice.

Kino’s sure his face is as red as the tteokbokki soup right now. Literally no one can see because he’s the only one in the kitchen, but his face is on fire. He continues chewing and stuffing the rice cake strips into his mouth as he spirals into a crisis. His idol crush actually likes him back? He doesn’t think you actually like him, but you did say that there’s some aspects of him you like. That’s kind of similar, right? Right?

The whine comes out garbled from his full mouth. On one hand, he feels way lighter, bouncier, more energetic at knowing that the idol he likes knows about his existence and that she actually likes things about him and openly talked about it on a podcast, oh my goodness is this really real, like no one is messing with me right now?

So Kino sits there, lost in thought as he continues spearing food with his chopsticks, thinking. About how to reach you, maybe get your number, maybe propose a tiny collaboration? Maybe? About how he’s going to act in front of you in the off-chance that you do meet, as you and Soo Ri continue chatting in the background.

Wooseok

He can’t help stealing glances at you—you look really good in this comeback, and it takes everything for Wooseok to not be too conspicuous and focus on the interview that coincidentally has Pentagon and your group as guests. He’d like to think it’s a dream, but really, it feels more like a nightmare because he’s seated right next to you and his members literally won’t stop looking back and giving him mischievous smiles, or turning their chairs towards your group and making small talk, trying to drag him into the conversation and he feels like a fool because he seems incapable of replying with more than two-syllable words.

And it somehow gets worse during the segments. Not that the hosts are bad—they’re really good hosts. It’s just that there’s a segment where they read selected fan mail, so they would all have to answer it because they don’t really want to disappoint the fans by deflecting. The first few were harmless: what food they like eating during summer, if you were an animal what would you be? But then it went from zero to 100 real quick as the third question is read by your group’s leader, “Which idol is your ideal type?”

Everyone can’t help but make exclamations, oohs and ahs as they think of an appropriate answer. The hosts are gracious and give everyone ten seconds or so to come up with their answers before coaxing out some people’s. Eventually the line snaked to you and you timidly replied, “Wooseok-sunbae,” while avoiding his eyes.

If Wooseok could see himself in a mirror, he would see his eyes bug out and threatening to pop from their sockets, mouth desperately pursing to prevent the huge smile forming on his face. He doesn’t know how to react—what should he do, Cube didn’t train them for this. He needs help and Shinwon keeps slapping his thigh and arm like that isn’t the most obvious thing to do when they’re being filmed.

He can tell you’re embarrassed. You’re facing the hosts, your back to Wooseok, though he’s assuming your face is super red right now, and it’s not because of the blush. He kind of just wants this to be over so you can have a reprieve, but the hosts (being hosts), ask you to elaborate.

“Um, he’s a really great rapper, and he seems really caring,” you say softly. “I watched a program with him once taking care of his cats, and I thought it was really cute.” Wooseok recalls that show and his chest loosens slightly at the mention of it, touched that you remember that tiny segment he did. He really loves his cat, and he’s not gonna admit it, but he likes that your takeaway from the program is that he looks cute playing with tiny animals.

“Ooh, yes, we love guys who are nice to animals,” one of the hosts says, and turns directly to Wooseok. “Wooseok-sshi, since she mentioned you, we’ll leave you for last, okay? So we can properly build up the hype for the viewers back at home.” The boy nods; at least this gives him time to think of nice things to say to you amidst the flurry of thoughts running through his head at the moment.

He imagines talking to you after filming is over and exchanging numbers. He imagines hanging out with you if you have any free time. He imagines maybe doing a small collaboration with you, wishes it were possible. The images he conjures up make him smile, even if he is still kind of embarrassed—he was never one of the cucumber-cool members of the group—but he decides that since you threw yourself off the boat, he might as well throw himself off and join you.

[cathyparrlyn]

Hey! So, I really love the way you write. You put in so much interesting detail but it never seems too 'full' or dull at any point. Your dumb*ss soul mate fic is amazing. I wanted to ask, how do you get the courage to write and post? I find I get really anxious that I'm not writing in the way others would enjoy, that I'm accidentally portraying a character's personality or behaviours incorrectly, and that I feel oddly uncomfortable controlling these fictional characters. Have you felt the same?

Okay, first off thank you so so so so so much! That means a lot to hear, and I’m glad you like my dumbass soulmate (also, I use to do the * too but gave up after a while, so that brought back memories lol.)

Let’s see, I believe I got the courage to post because I was lucky enough to have people always support me and my writing, even if it was just three people, reading a comment motivated me to do my best and learn more! And I have really come a far way, so I’m thankful for all of them.

As I mentioned before, Although I’m new to tumblr, I’ve been writing and posting fan fictions for nearly 5 years. I can confirm it not only improves your writing, but you meet some amazing people if you put yourself out there.

Yeah, it’s scary. I’m constantly worry about ‘what if’ or fear it not being perfect, but at the end of the day I always remember that this is for me first. Writing scenes are weird, you wonder if it’s realistic or if it ooc, and it’s a bit intimate controlling characters, but this should always be in your comfort with what you find to be fun.

So if you want to write, do it. If you are scared of posting, wait until you feel ready. I can’t tell you how many drafts of stuff I never post are in my drafts. And also, feel confident in yourself. You are creating something and sharing it with the world, there are people who appreciate that. If you meet them I can guarantee you will feel amazed with yourself.

My advice, always hold judgement that this is a hobby, an interest of yours. You can make friends, and people can love you, but also not everyone is supportive. The best part about being active in a fandom tho, someone will be there to help you out, hype your, and shut the other down.

Courage is hard in this type of hobby, I don’t think I even have that much, you just grow comfortable the more positively active you are in a community and the longer you are in it. So if you want to, try! Don’t get caught up in worries and miss out on enjoying your own creation (easier said than done, I know.) Give it your all, and be proud of it. You can also message me if you want someone to review it! Just remember, we are all queens doing magnificent things!

Hope this answers your questions! And I hope you love your writing!

Keep being queens everyone!💙💚

[scum-belina]

What personality traits and wants in life do you think make you likely to remain single forever?

1. I'm extremely introverted. I value and NEED a lot of time by myself every day to focus on my studies and anything else that interests me, and if that gets disrupted I get volatile FAST. Not a trait I'm proud of and I feel more like a mad scientist than a 25yo woman most days but like...it's just my personality!!! I've always needed a lot of alone time even as a kid. I enjoyed socializing and playing outside with kids for a few hours, then I'd be exhausted mentally and need time to read or listen to music for a long time to recharge lmao.

2. I have no desire to have children. None. I have TRIED to want to be a mother, but it's just not there. I even remember being like 5 and loved playing with barbies, dressing up, and every other girly activity EXCEPT baby dolls. Even then I found the concept of motherhood (for myself personally) abhorrent. I have a multitude of other reasons for not wanting to be a parent like mental and emotional issues, to name a couple. I know in my heart I would not be a good parent and therefore dont want to have any bc there's already an epidemic of people not fit to be parents but still had kids and put them through hell.

But anyways I know not wanting kids is a dealbreaker for most men, which makes me remaining single more likely especially in my 20s and 30s. And yes, I've heard the "you'll change your mind!" Schtick hundreds of times, but it is extremely unlikely I will. My life would have to do a complete 180 and I'd have to be with one hell of a man to actually even consider changing my mind.

3. I don't want to "settle down". The American dream type family setup repulses me. All the careers that interest me require a lot of travel and a lot of serious work that would mean I'd be away a lot. Not an ideal lifestyle for a relationship. Some people can make it work tho, but it's usually more when it's the man that's away for long periods of time, not the woman.

There's so many more reasons tbh, but I've already rambled way too much. In short, I'm just being honest with myself and others so I don't hurt myself or others by being something I'm not and doing something that's not right for my life.

Who knows, I might find my niche in life however unconventional it might be, and still meet the right person for me, and if so, great! I'm just keeping an open but realistic mind about my future.

Also I am not bashing anyone that wants the things I listed that I DON'T want for my life. What I really want for myself and everyone is for us to live out our best lives and fulfill our unique God-given purposes.

[awkwardanime]

Awkward Anime Episode 9: Kotonoha no Niwa (Garden of Words)

Makoto Shinkai’s desire to show the world of modern Tokyo and how everyone has a story led him to developing the 2013 46 minute long animated feature Garden of Words. This was a unique movie in the sense that, as opposed to his other works, unusual camera angles were used and the story was wrapped up with 14 minutes away from the hour mark. I sat down just 24 hours before typing this review, a hot cup of tea in my hand, my blanket keeping me warm as I hit play, not expecting anything different to that of Shinkai’s other works.

“The story of Takao, who wants to know other people”

This film was intended to be shown as a unique romance between two similar minds with maturity at the forefront. Director Makato Shinkai has stated numerous times of how he wanted the feature to be promoted and viewed differently to other projects, with the focus on the scenery and the theme of helping being important:

“To enjoy like music in their spare time and provide a little bit of relaxation”

I may be one of the few, but I never once felt like the two main characters would “fall in love” with one another. Young 15 year old Takao up to the point he confessed to Yukino, I viewed as a talented, driven matured teenager. Proven by his passion in making a career out of shoemaking, the student at the centre of the story I felt was a terrific character to epitomise Shinkai’s views on maturity at a young age. The renowned Director from day one ensured that this would be a romance, but it was done so in the most perfectly subtle way that makes me adore the genius that is Makoto Shinkai even more.

“The feelings that wanting other people to understand him more through his work is the starting point of a craftsman.”

The idea to include crafting shoes as an element that drives Takao forward was well done. Shinkai has stated numerous times that these shoes were used to show the stages of life. Crafting your own path is difficult as it is, but for young Takao to shape a pair of shoes for a 27 year old who he knew was confused, speaks volumes about the immaturity of both characters. Yukino, a women lost in society, who didn’t reveal anything about herself to this young teenager, not even her name. Yukino said as the rainy season ended:

“I am no more mature at the age of 27 than I was at 15” - Yukino.

The opening half showed that the confused teacher found a personality who she knew could guide her into someone she can be satisfied with. We hear from a call with her ex that she told him of an “old grandma at the park” which shows how she perceived Takao along with her sense of shame towards being able to connect with a 15 year old student.

“The craftsmanship of Takao matched the portrayal of Yukino, who, tired of society, loses her direction in life"

Never disappointing with one aspect of his animations, Makoto Shinkai again focused dearly on the aesthetics of the scenes to enhance the experience for the viewer, which it more than did. The uniqueness of the angles of shots in this film left me in awe. Nothing can beat hand drawn animation, which is perfectly optimised by the use of computer 2d cells. Shinkai, to ensure that he included realistic and effective scenes, went out and actually filmed scenes on location with a camera similar to that of a live action movie.

“I devised it this way to effectively show in the work that rain indeed does make green more vivid.”

Rain was the constant symbol that perceived the relationship and connection between Mikano and Takao. Meeting only during the rainy days, I saw this as a sign from Shinkai that even though their personalities help better understand one another, it only creates problems. One important aspect I noticed is when they do meet in the park after Yukino leaves the school, the sudden clap of thunder is heard a minute after their conversation begins. The understanding between the two was still flawed at this point; rain was not used only for the colours of the reflective surroundings to look that more incredible, but to also portray the times they connect will always have a negative consequence.

Every single scene in this 46 minute long animated feature is stocked with dense subtlety. I felt relaxed yet engaged every second, trying myself to figure out the feelings I have towards this “romance”. The foot scene, from the mouth of the creator, “Was done as though it were a sex scene that I wanted to be conveyed in a visually rich way”. That foot fetish tho

The light sounds that fluttered my senses, the unique art to that of his other works and the confusion of figuring out the characters leads me to put this deservedly as one of my favourite Anime Movies out there. The ending did give me mixed feelings, as I feel this relationship did not need a sense of romance nor a confession, though I understand why Shinkai keeps to this theme of confusion within love. I loved this movie in the way that it made me realise that maturity does not come with age. Maturity can be realised in different ways, there is no way to know if any of us have truly matured.

Age does not equal maturity.

Please share if you enjoyed this analysis and remember to eat those tiny trees!

Check out previous Eps:

Ep 8 - Kimi No Na Wa

Ep 7 - The Boy and the Beast

Ep 6.2 - Fading innocence of Ame

Ep 6.1 - Wolf Children Poster

Ep 5 - My Neighbor Totoro

Ep 4 - Summer Wars

Ep 3 - Spirited Away

Ep 2 - Koe no Katachi

[taeyungie]

hi emily!! do you believe in destiny? i started to think more and more about it because of bts (of course) and i think it's really beautiful the way even them think about themselves as people who were brought together by the destiny. also i often remember jk talking about how he truly believes our lives are planned since the moment we are born... personally, i think that can be special and scary at the same time. i don't know but i'd appreciate your thoughts about it too <3

hello sunshine! you asked a tough question to be honest hahah but i really really appreciate that you wanna hear my thoughts on it, it's really flattering that you came to talk to me about it 💓

personally.. i'm this type of person who literally questions everything, i'm kinda naive sometimes but also i don't trust anything and anyone aksnjzjs and when it comes to things like destiny or something we don't know that exists... i honestly have a hard time believing that... i don't claim that it's not true, but i also can't decide if it's real. everyone's lives are different and everyone has different experiences, and everyone looks at things differently, and if we're talking about bts or any other really good relationships that i saw.. yeah, i'd day they were destined to meet, because it's that hard for me to believe that they weren't meant to meet each other. but on another hand... i'd say that not everyone's story has a happy ending. the one thing that i believe in is that we attract what we think about, and that this can be a curse or a blessing, and i believe in this because i experienced it on my own skin and saw that happening to other people, and i have a really hard time believing that everything that has happened was such a big coincidence. for example... i have a really bad luck in life lol and i have been convinced for many mamy years about that, and although my head is mostly filled with realistic or negative thoughts.. i have always had hope, and i can't seem to get rid any of these. and even though i know i shouldn't think like that, and that if i shifted my mindset things would change, i can't really do it. and because of that i'm stuck with that mindset of having a bad luck. the same thing with relationships, i think it's all in mind of a person, whether they believe in something or not it will come to them. if we talk about bts.. there's no way that all these coincidences that made them do certain things in order to get into bighits building weren't meant to happen. but if we think about other things the same way... maybe some people are destined to not be as happy in life, you know? because if we think about it that way, there wouldn't be so much cruelty and violence in the world... ahhh it wasn't supposed to get this dark but LMAO i hope you know what i mean... still tho, i don't know if there's something like destiny, but sometimes i have a hard time believing that there isn't 😊

[fanfictiongreenirises]

yo I was tagged by @bundibird =)

Rules:

1) write down the rules

2) answer the questions the tagger gave you

3) write 11 questions of your own

4) tag 11 people

Questions: 

1) what’s your favourite article of clothing and why

I don’t rly have a favourite article of clothing,,,,,,,, I kinda have a bunch that are deemed ‘comfy’ which are baggy and have pockets and I’ll wear regularly (this includes pjs and i realised that the closer i got to the end of the semester, the less shits i gave about wearing pjs to class)

2) if you could have any type of pet in the world (fantasy creatures included) what would you pick

(oh shit) um,,, okay my #1 pet will always be a cat, but i’d legit love a unicorn. *shuts windows to stop ppl booing at unimaginative response* k see, when i had my horse phase there were these bks i loved (My Secret Unicorn by Linda Chapman honestly go read anything she wrote she was like half my childhood) and there was this kid who had a horse but iT wAS SecREtLY A UniCOrn IN DiSgUISe ANd YOU’D hAVe TO ChaNT THIS SpeCIal VErSe TO ReVEAL THE unICoRN and *sighs* it was gr8 k they went around helping ppl at night (instead of sleeping which kinda confused me like how do u do that every day u get no sleep kid) and unicorns are great. they get looked down upon now bc they’ve become more popular and suddenly wanting a unicorn is basic but i highkey stand by wanting a gd unicorn

3) Favourite fantasy world (e.g. Narnia, Hogwarts, etc) and why

You know what? That universe Emily Rodda writes in, with Deltora and Rondo and Dorne, because it was awesome. I wouldn’t survive there long if I had to do anything nearly as challenging as the characters in her books but it’d be a blast (and technically you’d still get wifi and everything we have bc the world outside of Rondo is what we’d consider ‘our world’)

4) if you could have any superpower you wanted, what would you pick and why?

Teleportation. I used to think invisibility but honestly teleportation is so much better (and u can use it to do a bunch of the stuff you’d use invisibility for too). I’m in an uncomfortable situation? “Oh hey look at that tree...” and when you turn back around I’m gone.

5) favourite season?

Autumn

6) favourite food?

I love food but I’m rly not that picky like as long as it’s seasoned and tastes g it’ll be my favourite for the duration of the meal

7) stiletto heels or chunky heels or no heels

Depends on my mood but never stilettos 

8) as a child, what did you want to be when you grew up?

lol I wanted to be a vet at one point bc I wanted to be around animals,, and then I wanted to do something horse related at one point but that passed p quickly... i’ve always wanted to do something with writing tho

9) as an adult (or closer to being an adult now than you were before), what’s your dream job now?

*depressed sigh* it’s still writing only now I’ve added ‘psychologist’ to that list too bc I have to say something that won’t get me lectured on thinking realistically when relatives ask what I wanna do with my life

10) favourite number and favourite colour

Rip I have neither lIke How AM I MEaNT TO ChOoSE

11) you get to meet one (1) celebrity from any time period. Who do you meet and what do you ask them.

Okay I can’t think of anyone in particular like if I could meet any celebrity in the past I’d go to the nearest ignorant buffoon who’s known for colonising a country and shit *cough* captain cook,, everyone who had anything to do with australia’s assimilation related history,,,, that dickbag who helped colonise india *cough* and ask them why before punching them =)

My questions:

1. What’s the worst book you can remember reading?

2. Old-fashioned lantern or torch and why?

3. How do you feel about fairy bread?

4. What’s something you always wanted a poster of but never got?

5. What’s your favourite kind of mythology? (Greek, Egyptian, Celtic, etc.)

6. Weirdest thing you’ve ever eaten (+ story if you’re comfortable lol)?

7. Scented candles or nah, and why?

8. Are you a fairy-lights-around-bookshelf kind of person?

9. Who would you want to sit next to on a 10 hr long flight (anyone from celebs to family) and why?

10. Do you have a random icebreaker fact/joke that you use, and if so, what is it?

11. What’s something you’d wipe your memory of to experience again (book, movie, moment, etc.)?

I tag: @lesty-xx, @princeofaustralia, @nackledamia, @rainbowtransform, @l-i-l-i-th, @theworldofshipping 

[lunarleo]

your ascendant/rising

the sign in your first house is the lens you see the world through and, consequently, the way the world sees you. It's a key aspect of your personality, coloring your world view, your attitude, your reputation, etc.

Aries: energetic, jumps headfirst into things, can seem aggressive/intimidating to some and invigorating/motivating to others, gets shit done, spontaneous/impulsive, driven, thick skin but soft on the inside, more emotional than they let on, too proud to be seen crying so they tend to get pissed off instead, they simmer down pretty fast tho and don't usually hold grudges, ambitious, passionate, courageous to the point of foolish at times, has a very youthful and optimistic outlook on life

Taurus: chill, friendly until you cross them, lowkey ready to pop off at any moment, takes no shit, seems slow but also gets shit done, wants things done their way, stubborn, determined, reliable as hell but def not gonna let you use them, thrifty motherfuckers, actually just wants you to stfu so they can go home and take a nap because they work hard to live comfortably

Gemini: their minds are always buzzing, curious, clever, amazing multi-taskers, great debaters due to their ability to detach from their emotions, may come off as harsh or cold at times, can be intensely introspective and thoughtful as well as talkative and silly, can be great listeners that are capable of resonating with many different perspectives but can also be easily distracted, loves to mix things up and try new things, needs the freedom to pursue whatever happens to catch their interest

Cancer: feels like you've known them forever after two conversations, empathetic talkers, warm and welcoming vibes, caring, attentive, nurturing, their whole being seems to envelop you, but if you’re on their bad side, then this enveloping will feel more like suffocating, strong but sensitive, can be very vulnerable people even when they don’t want to be, will withdraw/seem shy if they feel the need to protect themselves, prone to mood swings, prone to passive aggression, remembers everything, has a hard time letting go

Leo: playful and light-hearted, yet very serious about certain things, toes the line between disciplined and indulgent, always excessive no matter what, more moody than their pride would allow them to admit, has a difficult time finding the balance between overconfidence and self-loathing, work hard/play hard, very self-involved and self-aware, tend to be set in their ways, high maintenance, idealists, craves the credit they deserve, takes criticism personally, has a commanding voice (even if they're quiet)

Virgo: may seem stand-offish or uppity, but actually just reserved and need warming up to, wants to help everyone, loves to offer suggestions and solutions, wrestles with worries and feelings of inferiority, notices everything, over-thinkers, shockingly modest considering their immaculate attention to detail, can be very hard on themselves, messier than you'd think (depending on how they choose to prioritize), adaptable (they might bitch about it tho), irritable, sensitive to their surroundings, likely a picky eater, very curious, great listeners, dependable, loyal, the type of friend to swoop in the second a crisis occurs, says the most on-point things when you least expect it

Libra: doesn't mean to be fake but is kinda fake sometimes, knows how to play every crowd, smiles through almost everything, charming af, polite, just wants everyone to get along, never wants to take a side, can be very indecisive, uses humor to cope with tense situations, lowkey manipulative, can come off as an airhead or inauthentic, actually the sweetest people you'll ever meet (and smarter than you think)

Scorpio: if looks could kill we would all be dead, penetrating eyes, has a very sensual vibe, enigmatic, perceptive as hell, knows more about you than you think, dry/sarcastic humor, slow to trust, paranoid af, secretive, lowkey psychic (tends to see what's going to happen before it does/good at calculating the most probable outcomes/possesses the ability to "feel out" a situation or person very well), tends to be a “realist” leaning on the pessimistic side

Sagittarius: did they really just say that? are they kidding or not? not even they know sometimes. like the great Sag Queen, Nicki Minaj, once said, they're “throwing shade like it's sunny.” these people are not particularly concerned with being politically correct or family friendly, all they care about is the truth, blunt af, no filter, can be very rude and insensitive to the point of ignorant at times, always preaching the truth or telling jokes, restless, opinionated, insightful, insatiably curious, inquisitive, enthusiastic, loves to learn, explore, and experience new things, bounces between optimistic and cynical depending on the topic, more emotional than they may realize they are

Capricorn: unreadable, you'll never really know how they feel about you, deadpan expression, can be easily misunderstood as too serious, or as cold and calculating, dry sense of humor, cautious tendencies, slow to trust, slow to open up, natural intellectuals, very wise, reliable (if they fuck with you), capable (if they care enough), loyal, typically very close to their family and their tight-knit group of friends, not always as responsible and hard-working as they want to appear, secretly very insecure about their future, susceptible to self-destruction and self-denial, lots of potential tho, matures over time, usually grow up to be badass, independent bitches

Aquarius: approachable, friendly, social chameleons that can get along with all walks of life, thought-provoking, curious, has a well of esoteric knowledge, shocking humor, provocative talkers, intelligent to the point of arrogant at times, major superiority complex, can go from hot to cold in .2 seconds, extremely honest, doesn't sugarcoat anything, often feels alienated like they're on the outside looking in, excellent observation skills, open-minded but stubborn, truly believes that they know what's best, tends to overlook smaller details, struggles with issues that are meant to be dealt with personally and not objectively, can come off as harsh or unfeeling, loves to debate

Pisces: unpredictable, constantly changing, goes with the flow, has the ability to blend in with different groups and to accommodate different personalities, charming, dreamy, easily gets lost in their emotions, has a hard time being objective, experiences things personally, feels restricted by too many plans and needs a certain amount of freedom, may be susceptible to escapism, can be very empathetic and excellent listeners but can also be martyrs to their own emotions, very lowkey manipulative at times (usually by guilt tripping you or playing the victim), very generous and kind friends tho

[delusionaliisms]

sage n xander for the shippy meme.... :')

“ send me a ship and i’ll tell you…”  //  accepting.

Q01. who asks the other on dates ?

 wELL WELL WELL …. neither anymore lmao. but when they were ~together~, i feel like xander asked sage on dates more ?? or like they planned one out together like idk a day out somewhere or a night in, watching netflix and ordering takeaway ??

Q02. who is the bigger cuddler ?

highkey sage but lowkey xander lmao. xander is a big cuddler deep down ok but it just takes a lot of luring out to get it to show so i’m gonna say that sage is the bigger cuddler  &  xander loves it. he loves cuddling even though he pretends to be all Strong and Tough and Buffy who needs no cuddles whatsoever but we both know that sometimes he needs to be the little spoon too and have his hair caressed :///

Q03. who initiates holding hands more often ?

i think xander used to initiate it more often? like it was probably his way of showing everyone like hEY LOOK AT US WE ARE A COUPLE YUP THIS BOY IS MINE PLEASE STAY TEN FEET AWAY FROM HIM THANK YOU IN ADVANCE bc he’s possessive as fuck like that. but then eventually it probably became like a habit in the few months and now if they’re :) walking next to each other :) his first instinct is to grab sage’s hand :) but :) :) he can’t :)

Q04. who remembers anniversaries ?

me: what anniversaries…. ok but i think sage does bc xander is deadass so bad with remembering dates like this man barely even remembers his own BIRTHDAY … and he’s always had difficulties with knowing ~what exactly~ is their anniversary like.. the day they met? the day they first kissed? the day they first confessed their feelings? the day they established that yes we are a Thing, we are boyfriends?? he’s just confused ok so i’m pretty sure that sage is better at remembering the dates.

Q05. who is more possessive ?

ok like i said, xander is possessive as fuck so definitely him. like he gives sage hickeys just because he wants everyone to know that sage is his  &  his only  ( even though he isn’t, but that’s on u @xander, not that anyone else would know that anyway  )  and he just ?? always finds himself around and close to sage whenever they’re like at the same party / bar and he sees some stranger chatting him up like he’ll find a way to Interfere .. one way or another ! but then again i feel like they’re both possessive in their own way.

Q06. who gets more jealous ?

again, xander lmao.. he’s probably the most jealous person ever  &  i fucking hate him for that … like the only reason why he’d be so bothered by some guy chatting sage up, is bc he feels like sage is HIS ??? even though they’re not together anymore. and his jealous ass is also the type to ask around their friend group like … u know if sage has a new guy ... like he’s impossible. even when they were together, he probably like never left sage’s side when they were out for the night  &  having a few drinks with friends ,,,, just bc he’s possessive and jealous  &  can’t have anyone trying to steal his boy away from him :////

Q07. who is more protective ?

they’re both protective in their own way like xander’s the type to square up to fight anyone who’s even a little mean to sage ?? but then they’re also protective in a way like.. getting upset when they hear that the other hasn’t eaten all day? reminding each other to eat and do things that are bASIC HUMAN NEEDS ( tho not anymore bc that’d .. lowkey be weird like just randomly texting each other like “hey have u eaten today ? if not, go have some ok thanks !” ) lmaooo.

Q08. who is more likely to cheat ?

ok honestly… i think xander. realistically speaking i don’t think he would but if he would, that’d only be because he’d freak out at how serious things were getting  &  it’d be like.. the only way he could think of that’d make sage?? RUN THE OTHER DIRECTION?? like he’d only do it a) bc he’s scared and b) bc he’d be trying to push sage away bc god knows that no other way could do it.

Q09. who initiates sexy times the most ?

um… sage always booty calls xander… so him? ok honestly i think xander sometimes calls him for a booty call late at night when he’s downed one too many drinks and his bed feels too cold and too empty to be sleeping in alone. but mostly sage initiates them i think?

Q10. who dislikes PDA the most ?

ok so probably ? xander ? idk how sage feels about pda but xander definitely doesn’t like overly excessive, annoying and grossing everyone out- type of pda. like hugging, holding hands, little kisses and little touches are fine but unless you’re heavily making out at some bar bathroom, pls don’t be all over him bc that’ll annoy the shit out of him  &  make him push them away. bUT LUCKILY they don’t have that problem bc i feel like the only time they ever do pda these days, are when they’re at the same party / club / bar and they’re making out in some corner or in the bathroom tbh.

Q11. who kills the spider ?

again, idk how sage feels about spiders and bugs in general or like if he’s afraid of them / just doesn’t like to kill them but xander always kills all  &  any bugs, including spiders, bc he doesn’t like them. they’re too tiny and look odd and they make him uncomfortable ok, he might be 6′4′’ ft tall and be as muscular as he is bUT BOI does he hate bugs lmao. they make him UNEASY so he kills all and any bugs he sees !!

Q12. who asks the the other to marry them ?

hold on hold on ……. these two have trouble even aDMITTING THAT THEY LOVE EACH OTHER / HAVE CAUGHT FEELS …. and u want me to talk about them getting married … me: ok Sure why not ! dfkfkldg ok but hypothetically speaking if they were ever to get married, i feel like xander would be the one to get on one knee bc he’d rather propose to someone than be proposed to tbh.

Q13. who buys the other flowers or gifts ?

OK SO ……. i think xander used to buy these cute lil gifts for sage?? like just random things that made him think of his fav boy or things that he’s certain that he’d like? just cute lil things like that to show his appreciation for him. AND FLOWERS !!! flowers for sure, which would be kind of ironic bc sage is a florist himself but like.. watch xander bring him flowers??? like his fave ones if he knows what they are. but then again, idk but like sage seems like the person who would ?? also maybe bring xander flowers ?? idk it’s a cute thought ok :(

Q14. who would bring up possibly having kids ?  

this one goes into the same category as the marriage one …… they cant even !!!! admit that they love each other !!!! let alone bring up having kids !!! the fuck !!!! but again, for the sake of this meme.. hypothetically speaking, it’d have to be sage bc xander is scared of parenting honestly like… he’d Not have children if his partner didn’t suggest them / it didn’t just happen, like that man would Not suggest it himself so it’d have to be sage who’d bring it up.

Q15. who is more nervous to meet the parents ?

sage was, for sure !!! ok xander was kind of nervous as well bc he’s never met his partner’s parents / guardians before ( this bitch has !! never !! had a real relationship before !! ) but he’s also very charming and comes along with most people so he wouldn’t be like ~too worried~ or nervous. but we TALKED ABOUT THIS ONCE and i think u said sage was more nervous to meet xander’s family ?? so i’m gonna say him.

Q16. who sleeps on the couch when the other is angry ?

lmao NEITHER… they just storm out right away bc they don’t live together / have no reason to stick around for the night. or at least xander would storm out and bang the doors after himself lmao. idk if sage would be that extra but i’m pretty sure they both would just leave.

Q17. who tries to make up first after arguments ?

ok i think that it depends? like the one who started the argument / was wrong / made the other upset etc, would be the one to come crawling back  &  try to make up for the fight? like they should tbh, i know that xander sure as hell wouldn’t go and try to make up if sage was the one who’d started the argument in the first place.

Q18. who tells the other they love them more often ?

boi … is u for real rn…. NEITHER !!!! these little shits are too afraid to admit it !!! what the FU CK !!!!!

[surveys-at-your-service]

Survey #101

“be the wildest of the pack, screaming amen and attack“

you run into the ex that hurt you the worst; what do you say to them? i wouldn't say anything. i'd at least hope i wouldn't, but i have a pretty big feeling i'd smile and do a really bitchy wave at him. but i'd hope i'd just smile and pass by him. do you think everything happens for a reason? i guess. do you watch stand-up comedy? i don't actively seek it out usually, but yeah. do you attend church regularly? no. personally believe you can be a perfectly good christian without going to church. what is your preferred video game console (if any)? playstation 2 had the best games. if you got a call from a friend in jail, would you bail them out? nope. one, i don't have that kind of money, and two, if you're rightfully in jail, i'm not helping your ass. do you need things thoroughly explained to you for you to understand them? yes, particularly academic stuff. have you ever felt pressured to do something you weren’t ready for?  yeah have you ever worn jeans that were red, purple, blue or pink? i used to have maroon skinny jeans. loved those things. do you have a criminal record? no. have you ever been asked out by someone you didn’t want to be with? yes. have you ever had to spend the night at a hospital? too many nights. have you ever dated someone with longer hair than yours? no. have you ever worn flip flops in the snow?  dude, it doesn't matter what the weather is, i always wear flip flops if i have to have something on my feet lol have you ever broken a heart?  i don't know, but i doubt it. ever been though a really tough breakup? it was more than "tough" have you ever struggled with substance abuse? no. how about self-harm? yeah. how long have you been listening to your favorite genre of music? since the 6th grade. what is a common misconception that people have about the country you live in?  everyone knows america's stereotypes, so i'mma talk about nc. more than anything, everyone's a redneck, according to the rest of the country. that and we're all conservative as actual fuck. do you always shut your computer down when you’re finished with it? no. do you dread filling out the about you box on most websites?  no. starting it can be kinda hard tho. did you ever have those glow in the dark stars on your ceiling? i think so... would you ever get a matching tattoo with a s/o? i actually plan on doing so once/if i get married. i want to get a simple, kinda crooked heart with the words "you're awful; i love you" written inside of it in a childish font. it's a reference to the song "love me dead" by ludo. do you have a lock number or pattern for your phone? no. just don't feel that i need to. just another thing i have to remember. what was the hardest language you’ve ever tried to learn? latin. fuck that shit. do you have any food intolerances or allergies? bananas give me heartburn that makes me want to actually die. do you have any pets? how long have you had them? teddy, 9-10 years, cali, four years, bentley, year-ish, venus, not even a month. do you prefer female or male vocalists?  don't care, but i know i listen to more males. were you ever into that gel bracelet craze?  no. what do you do when you have ‘me time’?  watch mark or more rarely listen to music, rp have you ever met someone online that you wanted to meet in real life?  just to name a few: sara, connie, mini, megan (at least, once i did), emma, shaylee... give me an example of a sick death metal band. cradle of filth, brother. have you ever worn your boyfriend's clothes?  ex's, yes. has the school ever taken away your cell phone? no. i didn't use my phone in class. is there a name that you hear and cringe? rachel. do you and your dad get along? yeah. amazingly. he had no reason to forgive me for that letter i wrote him. have you ever made your own layout for myspace? lol myspace. but no. i don't know how to do 99% of css stuff. would you rather be called cute or hot? cute. i don't like being called hot. do you use youtube more for music videos or for funny videos? funny videos. what’s your favorite thing about summer? literally the one and only thing i like about summer is swimming. would you rather own a pet polar bear or pet penguin? if it was entirely docile and you put aside the fact that they need to live in the cold, a polar bear. but considering i don't live in a cold habitat and they're not docile, realistically, a penguin. do you prefer ice cream on a cone, in a bowl, or in a cup? cone, although it's difficult for me because of my lip ring. it gets in the way lol. are you someone’s best friend? i think i'm colleen's, if you're not including her husband. do you have a secret life? kinda. would you live with someone without marrying them? yeah. do you prefer bar or liquid soap? liquid. is your favorite animal endangered? no. how many schools have you been to in your lifetime? five do you carry pain relievers with you at all times? no, but maybe i should. i get headaches a lot. have you ever done something outrageously dumb?  more than once. last person who gave you a ‘good morning’ text? no clue. maybe tyler, but i'm not sure. what is the weirdest or cutest aesthetic you enjoy? weirdest, gore. cutest, pastel goth. strawberry shortcake or strawberry cheesecake?  neither. did you ever own anything from lisa frank as a kid? SO MUCH SHIT what are your most used emoticons?  c:, ;v;, ;-;, etc. have you ever used a bath bomb?  no. who is your favorite water pokemon? vaporeon which fictional character can you not stand? hmmm. oh my god, maybe ashley from re4. she's fucking annoying. what common advice do you think never works?  for those depressed: "just do this and that, it makes you happier!" people don't fucking realize how hard it is to do simple things, and usually doing them only stresses the individual out. what seems obvious to you that doesn't seem to be for other people? in most cases, spelling. what's a joke that you like? i actually don't like things that are general, accepted jokes. they're almost always cheesy. i like more witty things that aren't intended, if that makes sense? what single thing makes someone instantly undateable to you? does drugs. how short is too short for shorts/skirts? if your ass is showing do your parents trust you? should they trust you?   yes to both. what’s your favorite led zeppelin song? "kashmir." dat beat tho. if you knew you couldn’t get caught, would you rob a bank? no way. wouldn't be able to live with myself. have you ever dated someone in the military? no. i personally wouldn't be able to. like can you say stress. ever been prescribed narcotics? yes, xanax. maybe another or so. what is an irrational fear that you have? whale sharks. there's no possible way for them to swallow a person due to their esophagi being so small, but my mind doesn't care lol best part about winter: snow<3 did you attend your high school prom?  i went when i was a sophomore because my boyfriend of the time was a senior, then i went for my senior year. would you give your bf/gf a second chance if they cheated? absolutely not. what foreign language do you wish you spoke?  german. would you rather get money or presents for your birthday?  money. buy my own shit. do you have any exes you can’t stand anymore?  i'll talk about each one that's ever had the title "boyfriend." aaron and i are fine; it was a total puppy love deal so we never had a real relationship. he was cool, but we don't really talk anymore. we're facebook friends, though. juan, yes, i can't fucking stand him because he's a goddamn pig that keeps getting into trouble. jason, i wouldn't say i can't stand him. i loved him once and will always have residual feelings for him. tyler, i wouldn't say i hate him, but i definitely want nothing to do with him. how old do you think you’ll be when you move out on your own?  that's a question i don't like to think about much. i firmly believe i'd never properly survive on my own. so probably not until i move in with a significant other or i mature a lot more to where i can handle myself living alone. what’s something people always assume about you that isn’t true? that i'm a cold person because i don't say much. people tend to think i hate humanity in general and want nothing to do with anyone. on a scale of 1-10, how much do elevators scare you?  a seven, maybe. i'm really scared of them getting stuck. do you like slim jims? they are my true loves have you ever received a hickey from the last person you kissed? that is a fucking disgusting thought that literally makes me cringe. no. do you still talk to the person you had your first kiss with? no. if you had to live off one type of fruit, which would you pick?  strawberries. kiwi is a close second. how often do you drink monster? never. tastes like poison. when is the last time you did something illegal?  a few days ago when i downloaded some songs. do you give a good back massage? well considering giving jason one always ended up becoming more than a massage... what has been the scariest experience you’ve been through? overdosing on otc things and just waiting to see how badly it would fuck me up. thankfully, it literally did nothing other than almost make me puke briefly. you can bet your ass my sinuses were clear as fuck tho lmao what’s your greatest insecurity?  weight would you strongly prefer to go out with someone of your own skin color/racial background?  nope. i don't care. say you’ve started seeing someone you really like. as far as you’re concerned, how long will it take before you have sex? there's a lot of variables here. one, i think i'm going to continue being abstinent, but i'm not entirely sure anymore. two, it depends on the person. exactly how rapidly are we becoming close to the other? is jealousy healthy in a relationship? i think it is at a very mild degree. being a bit "territorial" with your partner is a good sign, to me. it's defending someone you love and showing you don't appreciate someone else showing them romantic affection, even if you trust your partner. should evolution and creationism be taught side-by-side in school?  i personally believe both of those branches should be electives. neither should be in the mandated curriculum. have you ever cosplayed? no, but honestly, i'd love to. is it wrong to sleep in a bed/cuddle with a friend (of the sex you’re attracted to) when you’re in an exclusive relationship with someone else? cuddling, yes, but sleeping together with a person not of your preferred gender doesn't seem wrong to me. how do you feel about government-subsidized food programs (free lunch, food stamps, etc.)? they're beneficial for people who need it. do you believe that heterosexual pornography is degrading to women? why just women and heterosexual? pornography is degrading to everyone involved. do you support the exploration of outer space? if yes, would you consider taking a trip into space, or even to another planet? i think it is important, but we shouldn't spend as much money as we do on it; we need to be more concerned about the planet we live on. and i personally wouldn't. is it okay for men to wear makeup? what’s your opinion of male crossdressers?  sure. wear whatcha want. would you let your children under 13 watch movies with full nudity?  HELL NO will you teach your children to believe in santa? i don't want kids, but hypothetically, i would. i really don't like the idea of lying, but i absolutely adore my memories of my own raising believing in santa. christmas was so magical. what is your opinion concerning strip clubs?  honestly? cesspits. is there any aspect of your sexuality that you would be too embarrassed to ever share with a match? i wouldn't say "embarrassed," but i know i wouldn't like to share the fact i find penises remarkably hideous. i find both genitalia to be extremely unattractive. what’s your passion?  meerkats, youtubers, silent hill, world of warcraft bc fuckin' nerd, heavy metal music have you ever been harassed and/or bullied?  no, thank christ. pick one: crash bandicoot or spyro? SPYRO! i like crash too, though. do your parents drink? dad doesn't anymore, mom almost never does. could you forgive a boyfriend or friend who physically hurt you? fuuuuck to the no son are you a funny person? lol no how do you feel about bob marley? his voice is fucking awful when you were younger did you have a neopets account? i sure did. do you have any gay family members? yes, an uncle. do you look intimidating? besides having a serious resting bitch face, i don't know. your last ex calls wanting to hangout, what do you say? nah son. could you go the rest of your life without drinking alcohol? yeah. what’s one fruit you love in drinks? strawberries have you ever tried wine? no, don't particularly want to. i know it's really bitter. have you ever just laid outside and looked at the stars? i used to do that while catfishing with dad. it was on a cement decline for boats to get into the water, and it was pretty comfortable to just lay on your back and look up at the stars while waiting. some of my favorite memories. could you date someone shorter than you? yes?? why would height have anything to do with it?? have a crazy side? not really, no. ever been kissed by a legal adult when you were a minor (or vise-versa)? yes. i like to forget it ever happened. ever been kissed by someone you didn’t want to kiss? see above. ever been walked in on while you were making out with someone? lol almost. thank god for fast reflexes. ever stopped kissing someone because they had bad breath? ha ha yep. i don't do morning breath. ever thought of someone else while you were kissing someone? no. did the one person who hurt you the most in your life apologize? yes, but i sincerely believe he didn't mean it. what's the last thing you and your ex talked about? jason, a lot. i was trying to gain closure, and i think i did. pretty sure the last thing he really said was stop saying "i'll try" and start saying "i will" or something like that. tyler, essentially to stop fucking texting me. have you ever thought about getting your lip pierced? it's been pierced before and it is again now. are you on medication for anything? bipolarity, anxiety if i need it, birth control, and an allergy med. what was the worst mistake of your life? letting jason become the entire universe to me. could you ever be friends with somebody who was homophobic? i am friends with a homophobe. i don't necessarily "respect" her opinion, but i tolerate it. i firmly believe everyone has the right to their own. does virginity matter to you?  i personally believe you should save it for someone you really, sincerely, absolutely love and plan to stay with, but i don't demean people who don't wait. regardless though, i firmly believe that you should at least feel that you love the person. how would you describe your sense of humor?  extremely dry. ever written fanfiction for anything? believe it or not, no. i don't even read it. would you rather get a tattoo or piercing? a tat do you listen to a band a lot of people don’t seem to know about?  ugh, otep is agonizingly underrated. how do you feel about children swearing? i'm against it. i believe a certain level of maturity is required to really know when it's appropriate to swear or not. what's a unique thing about your fashion sense? probably the fact i can look like a geek one second then a goth the next lol how do you feel about your weight?  i loathe it, but i feel better about it ever since finding out my weight gain wasn't my fault; it was a mood stabilizer i was on for a year or more called abilify. it's unbelievable how much that shit fucked me over, and it did absolutely nothing in terms of my mental health. my current psychiatrist pointed out how it absolutely destroys your metabolism, and he was honestly stunned when i told him no one else that i'd been seeing pointed that shit out, especially my primary doctor, who had some training in psychiatric meds; and the disgusting thing is, she occasionally acted angry towards me about it and really did make it seem like i didn't care about my health and wasn't trying. ugh. i am still remarkably bitter that i'd been put on a medicine that has a side effect of weight gain anyway considering i've explicitly told every psychiatrist i've ever seen DO FUCKING NOT put me on something that causes weight gain, because i've been through it before and worked my ass off to lose all the weight i'd gained from paxil years before. but thankfully, since being taken off abilify and loads other medications, i've been losing weight rapidly since my body can no longer sustain what i'd gained. it helps that my appetite has returned to normal; well, maybe even less than normal, but i'm not complaining. like it's brazenly obvious it was medication considering it's not like i started exercising or something, and i haven't gone on some diet. i legitimately pray that i can return to what i used to weigh. do you like to comment on other people's surveys?  only on close friend's. do you have any racist friends? yes, and it's the same story with the homophobe: i don't like your opinion, but i'm not going to generalize you as a whole terrible person just because of one belief. i'll never agree with you, but still. do you wear glasses? what style do you like better?  yeah. mine are kinda like big, geeky ones. do you prefer lemons or limes? lemons. would you consider your voice high, low, or in the middle? definitely low for a woman. any songs that make you laugh out loud when you hear them?  "i just had sex" by the lonely island ft. akon will, at the bare minimum, always make me smile. it's so silly. was your first kiss perfect? i wouldn't have had it any other way. how do you handle breakups? welp. if jason's and mine was any indication, i sob for over a year straight, get PTSD from it, want to die daily, and y'know, shit like that. i couldn't be more thankful that i'm over that shit. if you had to get a tattoo, where would you get it? there's a few that i'm debating on being my next. there's a big, very detailed one i want on my right, upper arm, but i'm sure it won't be my next because it's going to be fucking expensive. one that has a good chance of being my next is a cool design i found that is geometric and has a badass-looking ram in the center, then in an arch over it, i want the lyrics "maybe i'm a misfit, maybe i'm different; it will never be an average existence" from "rise, rebel, resist" by otep. i think it looks really cool with the design because the graphic kinda radiates a sort of dominant, resilient aura. i'm not sure where i'd get it, though. another that has a good possibility being next is a design that has a few tiny koi fish going around the wrist in a slight angle. it's really cute; i'd get it on the top of my left wrist. i also like this triangular design that has a watercolor, fire-like texture sprayed over it; in a pretty chiseled font, I want "Gefährlich ist wer Schmerzen kennt" ("whoever knows pain is dangerous") written over it, from "feuer frei" by rammstein. i'd get it on top of my right hand. this one has a high chance of being my next one considering the budget will probably be kinda small. lastly, another with a good shot is getting the anxiety ribbon with the lyrics "you can't kill what you did not create" (from "just when you thought we couldn't get any more emo, we go and pull a stunt like this" by motionless in white; yes, seriously) beside it. i'm thinking of getting it on my right forearm, on the side. WOW that was long pardon me and my tattoo ideas. do you wear your seat belt in the car? always. what's your biggest turn off? if you believe illnesses are only real if they're physical, i will immediately fucking hate you. like i know i say a lot i respect other's opinions, but that is one i will never, ever, tolerate. have you ever set a marshmallow on fire? yes. i'm awful at roasting marshmallows. thinking back to your relationships, who ended it? counting everyone who's had the "boyfriend" title, plus a "friend" who i briefly acted like more with: me, me, me, him, me. do you know anyone who's been arrested? i think i don't... have you ever tried to reconnect with someone from your past, but were unable to find them/get in touch with them? multiple online friends. do you believe that the more that you give, the more you will get?  in general, but not always. what is something you've recently discovered that you're absolutely in love with? how did you come across it? this is by no means recent, but the last thing i discovered that i fell in love with was rhett and link, whom i started to watch daily over a year ago. i was first exposed to them by my ex, but back then, i never watched them with him. big mistake lol. i actually don't recall how i re-discovered them... what was the first social network website you joined?  myspace. what is the worst natural disaster you've experienced firsthand? hurricane floyd. do you like to receive feedback on things you've made or done? i mean, sure. it's nice to see what others think. do you own any webkinz? ... i have ~40 in a bag in our attic. do you swoon over british accents?  O BOI do you prefer wolves or foxes? foxes. do you prefer opossums or raccoons?  opossums are cuter. did you ever have tea parties when you were little? only if nicole wanted to. she had this disney princess tea set that she loved to play with. choose one character: pooh, tigger, piglet, eeyore? eeyore was adorable. tigger's cool too, tho. choose one character: mickey, minnie, donald, daisy, goofy, pluto?  goofy do you listen to kpop, jpop, or cpop? no. have an acquaintance who's obsessed, though. which baby animal is your favorite? meerkats. like, have you seen pups?? chocolate or strawberry milk?  strawberry milk is fucking repulsive, so chocolate. does your job allow piercings or tattoos? currently unemployed, but i wouldn't work anywhere that didn't allow either. do you like rollercoasters? never been on one, probably never will. i'm too scared of throwing up. how old is your oldest and youngest friend? oldest, 30 or 31. youngest, 17. did you tease freshmen in high school? no, why would i?? i was one at some point. what is your favorite... bird? mammal? reptile? fish?  barn owl; meerkat; cobra; koi, maybe. what's your favorite bubblegum flavor?  i really like that watermelon one from i think hubba bubba? tell us about the stuffed animal you kept as a kid. what is it called? what does it look like? do you still keep it? i got a moose from the huge cabela's hunting store in ohio when i was young, and i named it brownie. i have him still sitting on my dresser<3 what are your favorite memes of the year so far? this is such a millennial question lol. are you in the minion hateclub or fanclub?  hateclub. idk, i just find them remarkably annoying. have you ever been a featured member on any website? yes. a sh fan site. do you prefer hot chocolate with or without marshmallows? without, but i can do both. who’s the last person you had a sleepover with? chelsea. who do you talk to about personal problems? sara, more than anyone <3 what would you do if you got pregnant? be fucking terrified, angry, but keep the baby, but give it up for adoption. when was your first kiss? 2012 ideal weather conditions? like 55 degrees, cloudy. the most embarrassing thing you’ve ever done? if it's the *most* embarrassing thing i've ever done, why would i want to talk about it? can you name 5 people that you used to be close to, but aren’t anymore? explain why. 1.) megan - she lied to me about essentially everything. 2.) mini - she just... stopped talking to me and now only does on her time. 3.) jason - he just about ruined my entire life so i no longer want any association with him. 4.) brianna - she found a new group of friends in middle school. 5.) jenna - we also just kinda stopped talking. it was hard to keep up considering we never went to the same school. she did call me the last time i was in the hospital though, which i thought was incredibly sweet. have you ever been told that you were good in bed? not explicitly, but i think the actions spoke for themselves. do you think you would make a good mother? no. i don't like being around others a lot and also don't fancy being responsible for another person. then there's the fact that there's a chance that after investing all that time into someone, (s)he could just grow up hating me. do you hate slang words like ‘tits’ and ‘shag’? depends on the word. do you ever watch wildlife shows? they're my favorite shows. would you pose naked in front of a million people for a million? no, actually. i am way too self-conscious and the embarrassment wouldn't be worth it. do you download music illegally? yes. been a habit i've had too long to break. favorite snapchat filter? i don't use snapchat, but of those that i know, i like the flower crown one. ... or is that instagram? idk. what's the worst thing you have ever done? acting in a way i shouldn't have with "just a friend." how many times have you been to the hospital? too many times. i don't know anymore. maybe six. top 10 favorite songs? in no order, here are some that i really enjoy atm: 1.) "false flags" by massive attack; 2.) "do i wanna know?" by arctic monkeys; 3.) "third day of a seven day binge" by marilyn manson; 4.) "pumped up kicks" by foster the people; 5.) "trap door" by ozzy osbourne; 6.) "face down" by red jumpsuit apparatus; 7.) "milk and cookies" by melanie martinez; 8.) "deep six" by marilyn manson; 9.) "daddy issues" by the neighbourhood; 10.) "why'd you only call me when you're high?" by arctic monkeys. i'm sure they're more that i like more than some, but i can't think of all right now. what is your skin type? (oily, dry, etc) dry in most places, oily on my face. what is your crush’s first and last initial? DM are you going to change your last name when you get married? yes. what is your favorite condiment to go with french fries?  ketchup do you like to eat stir fry?  ew. what color is your mp3 player?  my ipod's hot pink. have you ever laid in a hammock? yeah. we used to have one. have you ever lost a pet in a tragic way? how did you cope?  our goldendoodle got spleen cancer and declined in health in literally like a week. he had to be put down, and i was there for it. it was hard to get over. what can’t you go a day without doing?  eat, drink, use the bathroom, watch mark & do other shit online, watch gmm if it's a weekday. have you ever led someone on? why did you do so? don’t you think that it’s mean to do that? rather just not talk about it. i was a stupid kid. do you like gore? ... it's my aesthetic lol. but i have my limits about it. do you own any choker/collar necklaces? i have multiple. my favorite doesn't fit anymore and the other probably doesn't either. did you have a “scene” phase? no, i had an emo phase lol do you find it easy to trust others? nope if your s/o smoked pot/did drugs would you care?  i wouldn't date him if so. do you like hickeys? i don't not like them if they're private. what time do you go to bed? any time from like 10:30 to 3:00 or so. do you hate the person you fell hardest for? no, but i don't like him. do you curse around your parents?  totally open with dad, usually don't say "fuck" around mom. are you monogamous or do you prefer open-ended relationships?  monogamous ever made out with a friend? no. how would you rate your sex drive? normal, i'd say. if you had to have a color for a name, what color would it be?  uhhh. of those off the top of my head, maybe blue. if you had kids, would you worry about what they did online? of course i would. the internet has some things kids should never see. i doubt i'd go through their history though, if i'm being honest. i'd hold issue with that if my mom did it, so i'm sure my own kids would. have you gone mental?  oh you have no idea. would you take your kids to visit a black santa clause? why or why not?  yes?? what the fuck is this question?? do you remember the first conversation you had with the person you have feelings for? i don't remember, i just know he first called me "lip ring girl" because he didn't know my name lol do you know your best friend’s middle name?  colleen, and i think sara's is jane, but i'm actually not sure if that's just part of her first name. have you had sex with a black person? no, but i'm not opposed to it. have you ever had a serious conversation with your dad?  yes. he took me out to lunch one day and we talked about my recovering from jason. do gay, lesbians, bisexuals or transgender people bother you? nope. can you tolerate children for a long period of time? NO. just another reason i shouldn't be a mom. have you ever became attracted to someone you weren’t at first because their personality made you find them physically attractive?  yeah, jason. were you more fond of swings, monkey bars, or seesaws as a child?  boi i charged for the swings every time. what is the worst way to break up with someone? through text/any kind of messenger, omg. what must you have in order to sleep well at night? a fan on. what will you name your future son or daughter? i don't want kids, but if i did, the girl would 100% be alessandra and the boy would probably be luther. have you ever thrown a party for a pet? no, but i always give teddy a peanut butter sandwich "cake" for his birthday. what do you consider the greatest threat to mankind? greed. what is your favorite thing to do with your girls? just chill. if your one true love hit you would you still love him? fuck that shit. would you want to meet the man of your dreams if he dies in a year? no. like can you say traumatic. how did you meet your best friend(s)? colleen, girl scouts. sara, youtube. who introduced you to the band you love? all others besides ozzy, metallica, and korn, myself. what song reminds you of your first love? "easy to love you" by theory of a deadman. i couldn't listen to it after the breakup until very recently. what do you think of teenagers getting married? probably a bad choice. it works sometimes, sure, but you still have a lot of growing up to do. what movie that johnny depp plays in do you really like? "alice in wonderland" can you introduce yourself to a new person easily? NOOOOOO which disney princess had to go through the most pain? good question! maybe rapunzel? like can you imagine being locked in a tower for that long?? do you believe you can only be in love once? absolutely not. do you believe in premarital sex? i have mixed feelings. i'm more accepting of it than i used to be, tho. “once a cheater always a cheater.” true or false? no. just because you cheated once doesn't doom you to cheat again. do you believe its possible to fall out of love? yes, i lived through that experience. do you know your blood type? yes, a- are you catholic? i was raised roman catholic, but i'm not anymore. what kind of job did your mom have when you were growing up?  she was an assistant teacher for the special needs kids. have you ever stayed up all night on the phone?  this one time with jason. do you think that fishing and hunting are wrong and why or why not?  hunting is wrong if you don't eat the meat, imo. i have no problems with fishing because it doesn't kill the animal. what do you put on your french fries?  ketchup, sometimes. do you like mustard? yup. what’s the funniest nickname you have?  i don't really have a funny nickname. would you ever keep your favorite animal as a pet?  no. meerkats are very destructive pets. it's not legal in the u.s., anyway. what is something you eat but everybody else thinks it’s gross?  i've heard a lot of people don't like peanut butter. which celebrities would you have a threesome with? i wouldn't have a threesome with anybody. i don't support them. favorite character from "finding nemo"? it's always been dory. through time, i've also developed a respect for gill. do you change your type of music regularly? my music "type" hasn't changed since i was in the 6th grade. ever met somebody who seem like they hated life? i know a lot of people like that. do you look forward to the spring? absolutely not. welcome to the life of one allergic to pollen. which area of the sciences do you enjoy the most? genetics do you care about your weight? of course i do, everyone should. if you could spend the day doing absolutely anything with anyone anywhere, what would it be like? go to the zoo with my mom. is there anyone who lives in the same house as you that you can’t stand? nicole's dog. i tolerate him, but i do not like him. are all of your friends virgins?  to ask an adult if all their friends are virgins, realistically, has an obvious answer. not saying all adults aren't virgins, but you get me. it's more rare. but who are virgins and who isn't is none of my business. who's the last person who gave you a "good morning" text?  girt messaged me good morning via facebook, if that counts? i don't text a lot of people, so no one really tells me good morning. do you have something you’re supposed to tell someone, but you haven’t yet? no. do you like going to museums? yeah! what is a cliche thing that happens a lot in anime? the most unique-looking character is always the protagonist. if you believe in a god or higher being, do you think that they are vengeful and will punish you for your wrongdoings? vengeful, no. will one be punished, probably. what is your favorite scene from your favorite film?  it's super cool when alice fights the jabberwocky. do you have a hard time being around people whose opinions on alcohol and drugs differ from yours? nope. so long you don't do drugs or drink excessively around me, i don't care. what is something you thought could/would never happen to you that has happened to you? i attempted suicide. how often do you get on facebook? sometimes multiple times a day, sometimes none at all. do you think girls deserve more respect just cause they are girls? no, that's ridiculous. is there anything specifically that you’ve been worrying about a lot recently?  job stuff. where do you spend a majority of your time when you’re at home? i am literally always in my room. which deadly sin are you most guilty of?  sloth. who makes you feel the most unappreciated?  my grandmother. if heaven and hell are real, which one are you going to?  i ask myself that. there are a number of things in the old testament that i 110% disagree with, but then there's the fact that according to the bible, jesus' resurrection is kinda what nullified the "old" sins. hence why, for example, christians can eat pork or whatever. the old and new testaments are what separate christians from jews. but i'm quite sure the more "common sense" sins weren't suddenly made fine, but hell, how do we really know what's a "common sense" sin to a god and which ones aren't? idk. have you ever seen your dad cry? i've seen him tear up only once in my life. have you ever had a pet rat?  tezzeret, rhoka, rhett, link. i want another pair. could you go a year without sex? i've gone 21 years without it, so. do you like pudding? chocolate pudding, yes. what’s your favorite kind of doughnut? i like original cake, glazed, and chocolate frosted. do you ever trip over your pets? occasionally, teddy especially. teddy always lies on the side of my bed when i'm there, and he will not move when i get up for something until he's sure i'm not coming back to the room, so i have to step over him. do you think polygamy is wrong or acceptable? i don't support it. what is one natural disaster you are afraid of? TORNADOES do your wrists ever hurt from typing too much? that's some amateur shit, brother. haven't had that issue for years. is there any song that makes you think of your dad? "sweet child o' mine" by guns n' roses. if i ever get married, i really want that to be the father/daughter dance, although i don't see how to really dance to it... have you ever taken a picture of you kissing someone? once. what is the last thing you did on powerpoint? a final project for my art class my senior year. if you were upset, who’s the first girl you would go to? sara, most likely. are you afraid of falling in love? yes, because i'm afraid of being hurt. could you forgive your best friend for sleeping with your bf/gf? definitely not. if you’ve ever had and quit a job, did you actually call in and quit or put in your two weeks notice or did you just stop showing up? my first boss and i talked in the back room and he was so understandable. he was super chill and a great guy. second job, i texted my boss. do you tend to baby or take care of the people you date, or do you tend to date alpha types that take care of you? both. depends on situations in regards to how i act. how would you feel if the person you were interested in refused to perform oral sex on you? fuck, i'd be happy. i don't like oral. honestly, does it bother you when your friends make questionable choices? or are you usually unaffected by how others live their lives? of course i care, because i care for them. i don't want them to make mistakes that they'll regret. have your parents ever expressed interest in you taking up a certain profession or hobby? they don’t have to have had pressured you into it, but maybe just as a suggestion? yes, my mom reminds me i should be a vet a lot. hypothetically speaking, if you ever give birth to a son, would you have him circumcised? yes, for health purposes. do you ever get frustrated because you have great ideas for a talent you don’t have? for example, you have a good idea for a song but you don’t play an instrument so you can’t share it, or you have a great idea for a video but don’t know how to use video software, etc. yep, with drawing. i can picture things so vividly, but when it comes to drawing them... nnnope. who was the last person you talked to on skype/video chat? we've never actually video chatted, but sam and i used to use skype for voice chat every day when we played wow together. does your significant other/crush know about your tumblr? does he/she look at it? no, but i wouldn't be embarrassed if he did. but he'd probably judge me for it being a fandom trashcan lmao have you ever had shower sex?  no, and i never want to. sounds uncomfortable and dangerous as fuck. did you masturbate today? i don't masturbate. do you believe in karma as in “what goes around comes around?” no. not everyone who has done wrong ever gets what should be coming to them. how many brothers does your father have?  none. does your best friend have any tattoos?  sara, no, colleen, yes. are you a skittles person, or an m&m person?  skittles have you ever had a seizure?  no what was your gpa in high school? over a 4.0 are you better at telling stories or writing them?  writing them. name a band that you can’t decide whether you like them or not.  i pretty much know whether i like a band or not. nothing's coming to mind. what’s one word that annoys you when people use it out of context?  "retarded." don't fucking abuse it around me. what fast food restaurant(s) can you absolutely not stand?  arby's. ew. does it annoy you when people say “omg” or “idk” in a normal conversation?  it's a weird pet peeve i have, yes. do you have any best friends that you only know online? most of the best friends i've ever had are online. are you afraid of needles?  no. like don't get me wrong, the needles used for shots make me uneasy because they're so long, but i think that's kinda natural. do you have any plans set out for your future? if so, what are they? obtain a steady job, hopefully as a photographer, probably get married before moving to the mountains of nc because fuck the coastal plain. have you ever had a concussion? if so, what from?  yes. i passed out and landed on my chin. do gay people make you uncomfortable? no, unless i'm being flirted with. have you ever heard of the cranberries?  i've heard of their song "zombie," which i enjoy. who has the ability to hurt you the most emotionally?  my mom. do you have the same political views as your parents? we're all mostly conservative, but we have some varying views. be honest, do you miss your ex? not anymore, no. if he couldn't handle me at my worst, then i don't need him. if you have siblings, who do you think will be married first, you or them?  i'll go through them. ashley is married, misty's in a serious relationship so maybe she will be next, i don't think bobby or katie are dating anyone, nicole's got a boyfriend but so do i, so between us two, idk. do you like pastel colored hair?  omf aesthetic are there any cracks or scuffs on your phone?  no. how old were you when you got your first car?  i haven't had my own car. do you feed your leftovers to your dogs?   teddy will get something occasionally because he doesn't fucking beg like cali and bentley. what tricks does your pet do?   teddy can sit, say hello (shake), lie down, and say please (beg).  cali can sit.  bentley can't do jack shit. who is your favorite character on your favorite television show?   fma: edward elrich; that '70s show: probably hyde. who is your pet most attached to in your family?   teddy, me.  cali, mom.  bentley, also mom because nicole gives him zero fucking attention.  i'm the only one who gives venus attention because yeah, snake. out of all the colors of the rainbow, which one is your favorite?   assuming shades and tints are not included, purple or red. would you ever be interested in going on a proper african safari?  OMG YAAAAAAAAS if you had to be a teacher, what subject would you be able to teach best?  english have your parents met the person you’re currently interested in?   mom knows him well, dad's seen him a good number of times before the divorce. are your eyes the same color as your siblings’ eyes?  only bobby and i have blue eyes. do you prefer glazed or powdered donuts?   glazed. when you first meet somebody, do you stick out your hand for them to shake?   i usually don't initiate it, no. do you know someone who has asthma?   yes, my mother and grandmother what is the most controversial thing you've done?   uhhh... download music, maybe?? how many people have you kissed in your life?   three, but i like to pretend one never happened. what’s your favorite restaurant?   olive garden. do you act on impulse or do you think things through?   it varies depending on the situation. do you think the usa bullies other countries?   sometimes, honestly, yes. have you ever taken a shower with someone else?   with my little sister as a kid. can you taste the difference between pepsi and coke?   immediately. what was your first pet? do you still have this pet?   a beautiful collie named trigger; she was my dad's dog.  but no, she died when i was very little, so i barely remember her.  don't remember how she died.  i was told she swallowed her tongue, but i know you can't technically do that, so. what is your favorite thing to learn about?   meerkats. who’s one person who changed how you viewed something?   a number of people. what annoys you most in a person?   um.  maybe closed-mindedness?  intolerance? whose bed did you sleep in last that wasn’t yours?   colleen's. in a relationship, do you think about the future, or now?   both.  you need to consider both if you want a healthy relationship. are you a patient person?   NO.  i am the most impatient fucking person. are you pale or tan or kind of an in-betweener?   the irish is strong in this one. is life pointless?   i fail to believe we'd be here if it was. would you ever spy on a boyfriend/girlfriend if you were suspicious?   no, what the fuck.  be an adult and be upfront about it. when was the last time you were bitten by an animal? what kind of animal was it?   some weeks ago by our dog bentley, but it was just a playful nip.  he needs to learn to stop doing it, though. what was the last band or artist you discovered?   boyfriend's kinda got me into powerwolf.  heard of them a looong time ago, but never actually listened to them. do you have a favorite song by the cure?   "she sells sanctuary" are there things you’ve never told for fear that others would judge you?   yes. can sex ever be casual?  i do believe it's possible to have it casually, but i don't support it. what celebrity are you dreading the future death of?  there are many.  there are some who i think when they die, i will probably die with them. do you neglect your friends when you have a significant other?   no. do you own a gun?  no.  i know i by law can't because of my suicidal and depressed history, but i'm unsure if those i live with can for the same reason. if you had to delete one year of your life, which year would it be?   20fucking16 what is your favorite christmas song?   if you wanna count "the nightmare before christmas" songs bc who the fuck knows if that movie's more about halloween or christmas, i love fall out boy's cover of "what's this?"  if i can't include the movie's soundtrack, i like "the most wonderful time of the year." what is something that has really impacted your life?   more than anything, my breakup. what did you and your ex fight about most?  me and jason, uhhh... i don't really know?  we argued sometimes, yes, but i can't really think of a main topic...  as for tyler and me, we only fought once and that was the end of it. do you have a foot phobia?  it's not a phobia, but omg i still hate feet are you embarrassed by any of the songs in your itunes?   lol yes.  my collection of melanie martinez songs is so random. do you like raisins?  omg no have you ever gone on vacation with your boyfriend/girlfriend?   not with my current one, nor with any exes. have you met the last person you kissed's parents?  no.  known each other seven years and i have literally never seen his parents lmao have you ever been to a sports game?  yeah.  dad and i have been to like three hockey games. do people ever misspell your name?   yes.  people want to spell it as "brittney" all the time. have you ever had roommates?   yes.  when jason and i lived together, our friends, who were also a couple, lived with us. have you ever made a sex tape?   no, and i never would. do/did you skip class?   never one class exclusively.  i would fake sick to stay home occasionally lol have you ever felt yourself fainting?   twice.  one occasion where i did, and another not that long after where i know without a doubt i would've if i hadn't gotten down on my knees. have you ever been friends with someone with bipolar disorder?   yes. who’s the last boy to make you cry?   jason last girl?   my mom has anyone ever threatened you?   yes. would you ever own a rat?   i've had four and would like two more, but this time from a breeder.  i just don't like getting pets from pet stores... they honestly give no shits about them. has your mouth ever been washed out with soap?   no, but i'd be threatened with it as a kid. would you genuinely be okay with having a woman as president?   yes??  what the fuck is this question?? what’s the worst feeling in the world?   heartbreak, in various forms. what’s something you wish you could take back?   things i don't want to talk about. what happens to you when you get nervous?   i sweat, my heartrate goes up, i fidget a lot, i knead my hands, and i stutter badly. have you ever snuck out? how many times?   no. who’s the first person you kissed, and would you like a do-over?   jason, and no. who scares you?   jason, because i know what he was capable of. what’s the hardest thing you’ve ever had to do in your life?   learn to let jason go. do you prefer cupcakes or muffins?   muffins do you and your dad get along?   yes.  i wrote him a letter after the divorce though that he never should've forgiven me for, but he did.  he is a wonderful person that i am so so thankful for. <3 who was your high school crush?   first was kyle, then girt, then jason. do your nails grow out round or square?   round have you ever been on crutches?  no. did your mom sing to you when you were young?   i don't think so. does your boyfriend have a job?   way to assume everyone has a boyfriend.  but whatever.  yes. do your siblings dye their hair?   no. did you have a role model growing up?   yes, steve irwin. what's the greatest lost you've endured?   jason. is there a situation or person you haven't been able to get over, forgive or what-have-you?   i'm over him, but i haven't exactly "forgiven" jason. did you give anyone their first kiss?  no. what animal did you last pet or hold?  pet, dog, hold, snake. were you born perfectly healthy or with some (or a lot) of health issues?   i was perfectly healthy. did you ever catch any bugs or insects with your friends as a kid?  me and my neighbor hunter would catch SO MANY bugs. have you ever been disrespectful to one or both of your parents?   yes to both. do you believe in sex before marriage? is it against your religion?   eh, mixed feelings.  i think abstinence is for me tho.  as for if it's against my religion, i actually don't know if it's mentioned in the new testament, so idk. when you sign your name do you use your middle name?   no. do you have a shower curtain or door?   curtain has anyone ever mistaken you for being gay/lesbian/bi?   i've been mistaken as gay before. does the thought of being pregnant gross you out?   let's be real here, pregnancy is disgusting. did you ever have to share a room with one of your siblings?   my younger sister and i did when we were little. do you remember those "the land before time" movies and if so, who was your favorite character?   i loved those movies.  pretty sure my favorite was littlefoot. what band, musical artist or song do you feel you’ll never get sick of?   more than anyone, ozzy and metallica.  my first metal loves. do you think you’ll be a good mother/father?   no, and thus i don't want kids. is it hard leaving people behind?   if you actually gave a shit about the person, it always is. do you watch "the walking dead"?   no, i don't watch tv. have you ever had to get a tooth pulled? if so, what for?   no, but i may have to get this wisdom tooth on my bottom left jaw out.  it causes me to bite my cheek a lot. if you’ve ever babysat, do you like it?   i did once and i never will again. have either of your parents gone to jail?   no. do you know a hoarder?   i know two. what’s a reasonable amount of time before two people get engaged?   i mean... it depends.  people get close at different rates.  but i'd probably be doubtful if it was any less than like two years. what’s something you’ve done that not many people can say they have?   uhhhh... hm.  i don't really know.  i mean not many people can say they've been to a mental hospital at least five fucking times, but that's nothing to be proud of. what tv shows did you grow up watching?   just to name a few: "pokemon," "bear in the big blue house," "rugrats," "spongebob squarepants," "the amanda show," "rolie polie olie," "the crocodile hunter," etc...  lots of stuff on nick, disney, and animal planet. what were your favorite toys to play with as a child?   these plastic dinosaurs that i had. do you enjoy the arctic monkeys?  they have three songs i really love, one being one of my all-time faves.  i've heard a few others that are all right. what type of criminal would you be?   i wouldn't be a criminal to begin with.  but if you're asking like, what am i most likely to do to make me one?  idk. do you get attached easily?   once you start showing me i can trust you, yes.  but i don't mean this in a romantic sense; i learned my damn lesson.  i'm doubtful and very cautious when getting attached romantically, but as far as friendships go, once i think you're all right?  yeah, i get attached. what were you like when you were a kid?   i was hyper, weird, and really talkative.  only thing i've maintained is the weirdness lol would you go against your moral code for money?   no.  i have a really devout moral compass. what is your happiest childhood memory?   really, i have a lot.  the memory of me waking up early to play any of the original "spyro" games is strong with me.  i also used to love swimming on the first day of spring with nicole; we'd always pester dad to put the pool up as soon as spring was here.  we wouldn't even wait for the water to warm up lol.  then i have a distinct memory of dad teaching me to ride a bike, and i loved that.  playing baseball with dad was fun, too.  all things considered, i had a good childhood. have you ever had an imaginary friend?   no. if you could change one thing about the world, what would it be?   that's a hard question, but i'd probably take away greed.  it is the fuel behind a LOT of things. is there someone you don’t ever want to be out of your life?   many people, but more than anyone, my mom.  i have no fucking clue where i'd be without her. do you think you can love someone without trusting them?   not sincerely, no. what is a career you dream of pursuing but realistically you shouldn’t?   meerkat biologist.  i wouldn't survive in the heat. do you like 80s music?   quite a bit, mostly '80s metal. what kind of food is your favorite? (Ex. mexican, chinese, thai, etc.)   american how would you feel if you were drafted for the military?   NNNNNNOPE who is your favorite harry potter character?   i don't know much about hp. what is your favorite queen song?   "bohemian rhapsody" is the only correct answer what topics are you really shy about and don’t like discussing?   i don't talk about my hobbies period. who did you last pinky promise with?   probably colleen. do you drink bottled water?   if i absolutely have to drink water, i'll get it from a bottle or preferably a water filter that's been in the fridge.  i can't drink tap water. do you donate blood?   i did once in high school, but i don't think i will again.  it was a very stressful experience for me because i was afraid of fainting. have you ever swam in a river?   yeah.  welcome to the south. in what month do you start christmas shopping?  i don't have my own money, so i can't christmas shop to begin with. have you ever posted a question on yahoo questions?   no. do you still have clothes from your high school dances?   i have both my prom dresses have you ever felt manipulated?   yes. what is your stance on getting revenge?   childish. do you have a ceiling fan located in your bedroom?  no, but mom wants to install one.  my room is extremely hot, and the one desk fan i have in here is far from enough. disney’s "frozen": yay or nay?   nay.  so disappointing.  the pacing was awful and the story was so predictable. what does your best friend think of the person you love/like?   sara doesn't know him, colleen loves him. ever thought you knew someone, but it was all a big lie?   meet my former best friend. any music videos make you cry?   "hurt" by johnny cash really gets me, as well as "one" by metallica, but i wouldn't say i cry. do you delete people from facebook if their views are vastly different than yours?   no.  however, if they start pushing their views on me or straight-up bash mine, then yes. do you like to climb trees?   i wouldn't know, as i've never climbed one.  like 99% of trees here in nc are pine trees, so no branches are low enough to climb. have you ever played the "tomb raider" games?   omg so we had two.  i remember buying the first one, but my brother had the second one, i'm pretty sure.  might have been the first.  i got too frustrated with the first one, which i played as a teenager, but when i was very young, my sister and i loved the second one.  only our brother was good at it, but ashley and i would love to play and always lure the old butler into the freezer lmao. beatles or rolling stones?   i legitimately only like one song by the beatles.  i enjoy the rolling stones. what is your favorite accent?   british or scottish what was your first favorite band?   green day do you feel uncomfortable sharing drinks with other people?   yes. do you call any of your friends by their last name?   i call my boyfriend by a portion of his last name have you ever cried in school?   yes, but only in the bathroom comes to the top of my head. do you remember the first computer game you ever played?   not the absolute first, but i remember "putt-putt," "freddie the fish," "oregon trail," then there was this one i LOVED where i think some friends were preparing for a friend's birthday?  i think it was a lion?  i have very strong memories of a game that it think is called "amazon trail 3;" i played that game obsessively. were you baptized?  yes.