#really not nice to see as a trans person

[iloveacronix]

This was originally going to be a shitpost with Cole simply saying he loves men but it magically turned into a full-on postcard like drawing. Happy pride month pookies💪🌟

[transmascissues]

hey i know your post about your mom was mostly just a personal vent, but i have to say, do you realize that also happens with trans girls and their fathers? literally happened to one of my friends. i’m not trying to downplay your experience or something but i found it strange that you seem to think this is something that only affects transmascs

i have one question for you: so fucking what?

i don’t doubt that trans girls have experienced similar things and yeah, that’s bad too, but what the fuck does that have to do with me and the specific things i’m facing as a result of being a trans man? i never said “look at this thing that happens to ONLY trans men and NO ONE ELSE,” i just said “hey, isn’t this thing that happens to a lot of trans men, including myself, fucked up?”

i would also like to point out that what you’re talking about is in fact a different (albeit similar) thing. the way cis people treat trans people can differ dramatically based on the cis person’s gender because their commitment to gender roles is, like, a major part of problem. the specific way a cis mother reacts to her trans son’s transition is often going to be very distinct, while a cis father will likely respond to his trans daughter in a different but equally distinct way.

what i’m talking about is a very specific kind of ownership and control and self-victimization and total lack of boundaries masquerading as love and care and maternal concern that cis women (i would argue white cis women in particular) project onto their transmasc kids when we do literally anything to our bodies. i’m talking about a phenomenon which is closely related to the way moms often pass eating disorders onto their daughters (or children they view as daughters) because they see a body that looks something like theirs and project all of their insecurities and ideals onto it. i’m talking about a form of parental transphobia and projection that’s specific to the dynamic of a cis mother and her child who was “supposed to” be her daughter.

if you’ve never felt that, you’re not even remotely qualified to tell me shit about how i should be talking about that experience, and if you couldn’t recognize that experience when you read my post, i’m guessing you probably haven’t experienced it because the replies to that post made it very clear to me that anyone who has experienced it firsthand immediately knew exactly what i meant.

like, yeah, cis dads also project onto their trans daughters, but are they likely to have a reaction like running away with actual tears streaming down their face? do you expect them to passive aggressively make comments about how sad their kid’s transition makes them, how it’s such a difficult emotional time, how it’s so tragic because their kid’s body was so beautiful before? do you think their go-to transphobic reaction will be weaponizing their emotions? i’m sure there are some dads out there who are like that, but i think we can agree they’re in the minority because that’s not how cis men are taught to react and parents like this tend to be pretty damn committed to following the gender roles they were taught.

and even if i’m wrong and our experiences are exactly the same, let me reiterate that i never said this was an experience exclusive to trans men. all i said is that it happens to us. that’s just a statement of objective fact.

this started in my life when i got my hair cut short for the first time almost a decade ago and it has not stopped since. i’ve watched my mom cry over me changing my name and respond to being asked if my happiness matters more to her than my name by saying “i care about both”, i’ve watched her melt down in a mall over me getting a suit for prom and give me the silent treatment for days after, i’ve heard her plead with me to stop t because it “looks unnatural” and she’s just so “concerned for my health”, i’ve watched her stare at me post-op and say “my poor baby” over and over like she’s looking at my corpse in a casket. i’ve watched her turn herself into the victim of every single aspect of my transition. i’ve had to live with this for 9 years and spent the early years of the pandemic literally locked in a house with it. this has been my entire adolescent and adult life, and the question of if i’ll have to cut her off someday (and maybe never see my cat or my little cousins who i love more than anything in the world ever again as a result) haunts me every single day.

who the fuck are you to tell me how to talk about that?

[wowzoerz-blog]

You know it’s actually really nice being trans and true to myself as a person

Like, progress feels slow but every month I look back and think “Wow, that’s something unique I learned about myself!” And I am a much happier person because of that!

There is a girl under all of these repressed feelings that me and my friends are uncovering.

And she is just, Wonderful

[uncanny-tranny]

The trans experience of getting lucky with a new primary care provider who doesn't care about your transness or transition so long as you're getting the proper care

Manifesting this for every trans person because I finally felt like a normal human being going to a doctor

[h0dge-p0dge]

thinking of making a transfem or transmasc simpsons oc cuz the show doesn't have a confirmed trans character or trans episode yet. I think the reason is because the writers are scared they'll mess it up and accidentally make an offensive episode, BUT PLEASE GUYS JUST HIRE MORE TRANS WRITERS AND MAKE A TRANS CHARACTER PLEASE IM BEGGING YOU🙏🙏

I'm also a firm believer in transmasc sideshow mel and moe. also thank u Tumblr for introducing me to transfem Milhouse, that's my headcanon now too I love her she is my daughter🗣️🗣️ (yapathon in the tags)

[onlyfangz]

do me a favour, the next time you see a post that basically equates to trans men dont have any issues, or trans mens issues are miniscule in comparison to more important queer people, go to op's blog and count how many posts there are that are positive towards trans men.

[wild-at-mind]

Had a really stupid conversation via minor emotional breakdown with a queer friend about what makes an LGBTQ person 'assimilist'. From what she said I'm kind of forced to draw the conclusion 'if you say you're not assimilist, then you're not'.

[callixton]

still sort of thinking abt how leverage, written in the early 2010s, had a trans joke that was like. neither in particular poor taste nor at the expense of trans people. like practice what you preach or whatever but there are so few examples of trans people being mentioned in tv around then when it isn’t punching down or like. A Plot Point

[l0rd-0f-c0ws]

I frequently feel completely isolated no matter how much I talk to people. So that's fun

[toasted-valentine]

@pyrotechnicarus was right, that tv can fucking glow.

[vulpinesaint]

my problematic gender truth is that i actually feel no attachment to either of the two binary gender constructs. it just like. makes no sense to me. i've got my own unrelated thing going on. but in the absence of connection to either choice i really do find it more convenient to cosplay closer to the one that people treat like a human being

[miharuhebinata]

what is with cozy games and making one (1) nonbinary LI that's just a skinny white androgynous-looking person with short hair

[casiavium]

All of these "who has more anything gender!" polls are just. white man without extreme body builder muscles v white man without extreme body builder muscles. The gender is "masculine" stop pretending it's universal

[vaguelydefinedshapes]

Goddd there's something so humbling about being broken up with when you didn't really like the person either,, like oh, I'm too much to handle for the guy who made me uncomfortable. Okay. When can I get my hoodie back

[saxifactumterritum]

I am in considerations for watching good omen season 2. I liked season 1, it was fun. I know lots about s2 tumblr is noisy about it. People seem to really dislike Aziraphale, or sometimes he is just an object for Crowley joy, so maybe he is bad in s2. Maybe it is lots about all the wonderful things about Crowley and not about the nice things about Aziraphale. ANXIETY. Maybe I will reread the book instead. That will be much nicer I think. Way less anxiety.

[purple-is-great]

I bought a trans flag today! We'll see if I have the guts to bring it to pride this year (my town's pride week is rather late in the summer), but i own one now!