#remus is struggling getting his magic to flow

[lulublack90]

Prompt 2 - Ricusempra

@wolfstarmicrofic April 2, word count 618

“Right class we will be learning a new spell today. Nothing too difficult, I promise you,” Professor Flitwick assured after moans from the class. Most of them had only just managed to cast Wingardium Leviosa correctly. 

“Don’t see why we can’t do something difficult,” Sirius whispered to him as Professor Flitwick went on. 

“Speak for yourself,” Remus muttered back. He’d really struggled with Wingardium Leviosa, the same with his other lessons. He could feel the magic but didn’t seem to be able to access it properly. It was always a chore to call upon it. On the other hand, Sirius’s magic flowed like water. It was never far away when Sirius needed it and every spell came as naturally as breathing to him. 

“Okay class, each of you pair up and try the spell out on each other. Remember the nice curving motion,” as Remus was sitting next to Sirius today, so they paired up. The four of them tried to rotate so they all got a chance to sit with each other. Remus checked the blackboard behind Professor Flitwick and practised the wand moment a few times. He nodded to himself once he was sure he had it. 

“Ready?” Sirius asked, quirking an eyebrow at him. 

They found an empty space in the classroom and raised their wands. 

“You go first,” Remus told Sirius. He was nervous. Sirius twirled his wand.

“Rictusempra,” he cried, and Remus began laughing as invisible feathers tickled his skin. He bent forward, gasping, waiting for the spell to end. “Right, your turn,” Sirius grinned once Remus could stand up straight again. Remus took a deep breath, steeling himself. 

“Rictusempra,” he chanted. He could feel the magic right there, but something was blocking it and only a trickle fought its way out. Sirius rolled his shoulders, slightly uncomfortable. 

“Was that it?” He asked and Remus felt his cheeks heating. Sirius smiled at him and came to stand behind him. “Hey, Potter, come be my stand-in,” James immediately moved to the spot Sirius had been in and stood waiting. 

Remus flinched as Sirius’s hands ran down his arms to hold his wrists. “Like this, Remus,” and he lifted Remus’s wand arm, swishing his wand through the air. “This time say the incantation,” His breath tickled the tiny hairs on the back of Remus’s neck, and he felt a shock of something jolt through him. Sirius raised his hand and began to move it. 

“Rictusempra!” he shouted. He was expecting the usual slug of magic, but the rush of power he felt coursing through him was unlike anything he’d felt before. The floodgates had well and truly been opened. His hand spasmed with the amount of magic sliding down his wand. James fell to the floor in howls of laughter. 

“R-r-r-remus! S-s-s-stop! He gasped around his laughs. 

“Well done, Mr Lupin. Very powerful casting. Ten points to Gryffindor. Finite incantartum,” Flitwick squeaked as he ended the spell for James’s sake. 

“That was amazing, Remus,” Sirius said, still holding his wrists. Remus looked down at his trembling hands. Had Sirius done that? Why had his magic released now? He waited until Sirius had let him to go make fun of James and pointed his wand at his textbook. 

“Wingardium Leviosa,” His magic shot through him again and his book bounced off the ceiling. He stared at it in awe, realising he’d need to practice controlling this newfound power, or he was likely to take someone's head off. He grinned as James bent over double when he was supposed to be the one casting the spell on Peter, but Sirius had got to him first. He grinned. School had just got a hell of a lot easier. 

[janis-takes-requests]

Janis’ Angst Corner

+ Roman has a skin picking disorder, he will spend hours in front of a mirror trying to get rid of any blemishes, real or imagined. 

+ While Patton has gotten better with sharing his feelings with the others, he still prefers to repress them, he hates all his negative thoughts and emotions, and often confides in Logan or Janus about them because those are the only two he thinks can handle it without making a big fuss

+ Even though Janus encourages Patton to open up and be honest about his emotions, Janus himself represses all of his own negative emotions, not wanting to burden anyone else because he already feels like a constant burden. 

+ Remus doesn’t miss his brother at all, in fact, he hates that the others think he does, he wants nothing more than for Roman to disappear because there is nothing Roman could do to fix things. 

+ Virgil struggles with self harm, and uses his webs to bind his own arms so tightly that he restricts his blood flow, but he magically fixes them so no one knows, other than Janus who stays out of it because Virgil would kill him if he told the others. 

[moony-to-ur-pads]

Overhearing Something They’re Not Supposed to Hear (Pt 1)

@jilytoberfest

Lily strained her eyes against the candle light and cursed all wizarding kind for their continued stubbornness in not investing in some sort of electricity. This was hurting her eyes.

Not that she could finish up anytime soon—she had an essay for McGonagall that was due tomorrow, an Astronomy chart she had to get around to, and some Potions work she really needed to revise.

NEWTs were no joke, their professors had made that clear—and the work was only going to get harder as they finished up sixth year and headed into their seventh.

But one thing at a time; she had an infuriating Transfiguration essay to finish.

Lily was loathe to admit it, but she was really struggling in McGonagall’s class. At first, she’d thought she was just having a bad week. Things would click for her eventually. They always did.

But no—it had been at least a month now, and Lily was stumbling through her Transfiguration studies like a blindfolded naked mole rat, senseless and stupid.

It didn’t help that Potter was, as usual, the shining star. Him and Sirius, too. They couldn’t help but show off. And they’re showing-off-iness had only gotten considerably more earnest as they delved into their current unit: nitpicking the specifics of Animagi.

McGonagall had warned them it would be difficult, but for god’s sake—Lily had never imagined it would be like this.

She gave a frustrated sigh, and slammed her copy of Advanced Transfiguration shut. No, she did not have a bloody clue what the significance of the mandrake leaf was in the Animagus transformation process. Yes, that meant she couldn’t finish the goddamn essay. Yes, it was due tomorrow. No, she didn’t need any help…

Maybe she did.

Mary was the only other Gryffindor girl taking the class, and Lily knew she was completely clueless, too. And she certainly didn’t know the sixth-years from the other houses well enough to barge into their common rooms at midnight begging for homework help.

There were only two people she could ask, really.

The thought of running to James Potter for help brought a bitter taste to Lily’s mouth. Sure, they weren’t on opposite sides of an arch-nemesis Potter-Snape war any longer, but James and Lily weren’t exactly friends. More acquaintances. And it was like there was an unspoken competition between the two, a need to better each other and beat the other in…well, everything.

The other day, Lily had eaten a stack of pancakes the same height as Pettigrew, just because Potter had told her she couldn’t. A week ago, he’d beat her in a History of Magic pop quiz, and she’d demanded a retest from Professor Binns—with such fiery passion that the ghost professor had seemed quite frightened of her. She didn’t think a student had ever confronted him like that, or indeed, ever talked to him at all.

Point was, there was a certain… competitive dynamic between James Potter and her. And this Transfiguration essay would be like waving a white flag in his face. He wouldn’t ever let her forget it.

But, Lily concluded, some things were more important than a silly classroom rivalry. Like staying on McGonagall’s good side, and passing her NEWTs.

She was going to go get herself some help.

…

Lily climbed the stairs to the boy’s dormitory with the utmost trepidation. Even now, she couldn’t quite believe that she was doing this. Surrendering to James Potter… god, she hated this.

Lily knew which door to enter. Remus had brought her up a few times, but even if she’d never been in the dorm, she couldn’t have missed the letters printed on the door. Golden, flowing cursive proudly proclaimed that the dormitory was that of the ‘Marauders’.

She shook her head in disbelief. They were such dorks.

Lily opened the door and headed into the dormitory. On hind sight, she should have knocked… but the idea hadn’t occurred to her at the times—she’d been so consumed by the thought of her own pathetic submission to Potter.

The Marauder’s dormitory was dark when she entered, and oddly silent. She didn’t expect the boys to be asleep—it wasn’t so late yet—but she hadn’t expected the room to be completely empty. It was midnight, after all. Maybe the idiots were out and busy with some immature, pranking shenanigan.

She was just about to give up and resign herself to the doom of an incomplete essay, when a voice called out through the gloom—

“Pads? That you?”

Lily didn’t recognise the voice. It was oddly constricted. A little thick, too. As if the person in particular were… crying?

She felt heat rush to her face. Lily froze on the threshold, unsure of herself. Did she make herself known? Did she leave?

“Hello?” the voice called out again. There was a rustle of sheets, and the metallic scrape of a four poster curtain pulled back.

Lily cleared her throat. “Err… maybe I’ll just—”

The sounds of activity ceased, so abruptly that Lily imagined the person had all but frozen.

“Who’s that?” they called out again, in a voice that was rougher.

Lily lit her wand. Somehow, turning the lights on felt like even more of an intrusion. She took a few hesitant steps in the direction of the voice. “It’s Lily,” she said.

There was a drawn out sound—something between a groan and a sob.

Lily stopped in her tracks. “Do you… want me to leave?”

“Why are you even here, Evans?”

Lily’s eyes widened. She knew the voice. Only one person said her name like that. Well, plenty of people called her ‘Evans,’ but only one person said it like that.

“Potter?”

Lily didn’t wait for a reply. She crossed the room to the furthest bed from the door, where the voice had come from.

She pulled the curtain back.

James Potter was sitting at the end of the bed. The milky light of her wand cast the redness of his cheeks, his eyes, his nose, into bright relief. He glared up at her with a mixture of defiance and resentment, as if daring her to judge him.

For a moment, Lily could only stare. She didn’t know what to say.

She noticed the edge of a letter poking out between the fingers of his hand, curled into a tight fist.

Lily ran a hand through her hair, nervously. “Bad news from home?” she mumbled, lamely.

He got to his feet and headed to his beside. She watched as he stuffed the letter into a drawer and straightened back up. “We’re in the middle of a war. I’m sure I’m not the only one.”

“Doesn’t mean you’ve got any less the right to be upset about it.”

James glanced back at her. His eyes were still a shocking red, as if he’d been crying quite the while.

Lily felt a little uncomfortable, but more than that, she wanted to help.

“What happened?” she whispered, as gently as she could.

“It’s nothing, Evans. Don’t concern you.” He pulled his own wand out and lit it.

“Maybe I can help.”

He scoffed. “Help? Do you think I’d be sitting here crying if there were anything I could do?”

“What is it, James?” she pressed. “Maybe I can’t fix it, but I reckon I can make it easier to deal with. It always helps to talk about it. My dad always says that bad news, it’s—”

Potter crumbled.

He fell to pieces on the edge of his bed, and all Lily could do was watch.

Moving any closer felt wrong. Staring felt wrong, too. Saying anything felt worse.

She didn’t know what to do.

That was weird.

Lily always knew how to help other people, how to cheer them up. She usually went for a hug. For some reason, that didn’t feel quite right here.

He had his face hidden behind his hands, so Lily couldn’t see the tears. His shoulders shook, though, and his sobs were grating against the silence of the dorm.

Lily lowered herself onto the bed next to him. She didn’t say anything.

“Fuck it, Evans—” he gasped out. “Maybe you’re right, eh?”

Lily tentatively slipped an arm around his shoulders. It felt weird at first, but Potter melted into her embrace so easily that it soon felt like the most natural thing in the world.

“It’s my dad.” James re-emerged from behind his hands, rubbing a runny nose. He’d taken his glasses off, and his irises were a light brown in the glow of their wand tips. “He’s… err,” James cleared his throat, “Got dragon pox.”

Lily let out a soft gasp.

James shrugged. “And, well… dad isn’t young. They don’t get through so well at his age.”

She didn’t know what to say.

She’d seen Potter’s parents at King’s Cross a few times. To say they weren’t young was a pretty severe understatement. The first time she’d seen the three of them, Lily had thought James lived with his grandparents.

“And if dad has the pox, then mum’s… she’s probably got it, too. And… well, she’s got a weak heart on top of it. I’m just…” He groaned and pulled at his hair, head bowed.

“Potter… oh, God, James—I’m so sorry.”

He raised his eyes to meet hers. There was a tear halfway down his cheek. James wiped it away. “I’m scared, Lily,” he whispered. James Potter didn’t sound like an arrogant toe rag. He sounded like a frightened kid.

That was what he was, Lily thought. Sixteen, and terrified.

“I can’t… Lily—I… I love them so much. I can’t lose them, Lilly, I can’t—”

“Well, dragon pox isn’t fatal,” she reasoned, interrupting him gently. “And a lot of the statistics and stuff they have on it is from the outbreaks years ago. They’ve got much better potions and procedures to deal with it now, right? It can’t be as deadly as these make it out to seem.”

“But what if it is?” he choked out.

Lily took a deep breath. “James—there’s hope. A fair amount of it.” She gripped his hand and gave it a comforting squeeze. “Don’t lose hope, James. You’re parents are strong people. Aren’t they?”

“Yes,” he mumbled. “S’pose they are.”

“If they’re anything like they’re son, they must be.”

James gave a weak laugh. “Oh, they’re a hell of a lot better than they’re son.”

She got to her feet and pulled him up after. “You know, when I get bad news, I like to go to Hogsmede.”

“Hogsmede?”

“The Hog’s Head,” she confessed. Lily gave him a mischievous smile. “They’ve got wicked fire whiskey. Tried it?”

“Evans!” James gasped. “You two-faced, teacher ass-kissing delinquent.”

“So, are you up?” she asked.

James smiled. His eyes were still red, his nose was still pink, and his cheeks were still brightly flushed. But he was smiling, and his eyes were shining from something that wasn’t tears. “I think so,” he said, “Let’s go get pissed, love.”

[lostmykeysie]

can i ask who are ur fave fancast/face claims for the marauders?? or how do you picture them in the horcrux hunt?

omg what a fantastic question okay prepare yourself for the most boring answer babes

i have no idea!!!!! i don’t think i’m very creative because i struggle to actually marry up how i think about them and how they look?? i also remember about 3 famous peoples names and when you think of me you should think of someone who lives in a hole somewhere so my knowledge of anything is CRAP

who do y’all picture???? help me get my brain juice flowing?? i want a fave fancast :( pls help me cure my depression this might be the only way

i have done a ramble (i’m really sorry i can’t figure out how to do the ‘read more’ thing on my phone????):

the only person (who isn’t even in THH for the love of god) that i have a fave fancast for is mary, who is duckie thot. she just is

i’m very much from the dev patel as james potter generation, and i think he might be the easiest one to fancast? south asian golden retriever man. that’s it. that’s all you need and you’ve got JP

i like to think of remus as mixed race with a mixed race parent (lyall). one of those people you look at and think hmmmm. he looks…. not fully white. a bit racially ambiguous. i like to think of him as an absolute mess hot pot of a person who’s grown up with a whole different confusing bunch of cultures, ethnically and muggle vs magic, and then throw in the werewolf… he’d have an interesting experience growing up but he’d struggle with the feeling of belonging you know??? a bit odd looking but in a nice way. an interesting looking guy (maybe this is why i can’t think of a faceclaim)

i love seeing east asian reg and sirius but i cannot claim C&TW black brothers are asian when i’ve done nothing to indicate the fact! THH black brothers give me french aristocrat vibes, pale but with olive toned skin. sirius defo has a broody face and a strong jaw and those lush brows that are thick with just a hint of an arch, and of course, grey eyes like his mama. reg i think of as having really dark eyes, ones that look black, and much more delicate features. one of those adorable noses that points up a little awwww

everyone else is generic descriptions :(

I DONT KNOW!!!!! give me INSPO, PLEASE

[wistfulrat]

this week’s fics! feat. bakeries, bookshops, bisexual awakenings of the angsty and fluffy sort, wolfstar goddads being tender as hell, desi harry reconnecting with his culture, domestic drarry, a lap dance set to akon’s smack that, and more!

But That’s History by @ebbet - 54k - T Harry Potter starts his first year as Muggle Studies Professor only to find that Draco Malfoy has been hired to teach History of Magic.

listen to me. this is one of the funniest drarry fics i've ever read. i was cackling in my bed at 2am because harry’s internal monologues throughout this fic are unhinged. insanely quotable. “what was he, a lothario” and “you were crushing me with your muscular thighs!” are lines that live rent free in my empty head. harry has never played anything cool a day in his life. there’s a faculty meeting where the teachers are planning the yule ball and debating the merits of a DJ when harry decides he must defend his muggle-music-loving honor by dancing seductively to akon’s smack that while a blushing draco loses his mind. i fucking screamed. and the best part is that in between the comedic scenes threading the overall story, you have extremely tender moments of like, padma patil helping harry become a more rooted desi by sharing their cultural traditions, harry proudly donning his sherwani. draco wrestling with his past, going to harry’s lgbtq+ club for students, being sheepish with ron and hermione. ugh, comedic writers with emotional depth are clever and talented as hell!!

Realities, Unfurling by @ebbet - 45k - M Draco Malfoy is released from Azkaban into a changed world.

incredible collage-fic told from multiple povs. 8yrs post-war and everything’s changed. the current state of the magical world unfolds via slice-of-life snapshots from a truly stunning cast. non-binary harry whom is running a non-prof org dedicated to building tolerance and establishing equality for marginalized identities. post-prison-release draco whose life will be changed by the internet. neville’s tender relationship with blaise. andromeda’s fiercely protective mothering. remus and sirius being alive and very hot and just, the tender goddads harry deserved. cho chang being brilliant. baker pansy’s softened edges. found families abound. harry being flustered by their crush on draco and making personalized playlists on an iPod nano.

that all might sound narratively cluttered but the author more than pulls this off. glorious, start to finish.

Knead by @jovialobservationanchor (an @hd-erised​ fic) - 83k - E This is not a story about Harry renovating Grimmauld Place. This is a story about coffee shops and brewpubs, about Ginny and Luna on a farm with creatures, about magical Oregon, coastal road trips, flying, friendship, and Draco Malfoy's lean arms.

cinematic. a love letter to oregon’s expansive landscapes and lively cities. it’s harry finding home in unexpected places and people. in the vast silence of rolling fields, endless coasts, and starry night skies big enough to feel like you’re adrift in space. and it’s also the lingering, intimate quiet of early mornings in a bakery, sitting on a park bench overlooking the city as you eat ice cream next to your crush. it’s harry watching ginny and luna dance and work around each other like bees. it’s the slow unfolding of harry and draco’s relationship as they fill each other’s quiet. finishing this fic is like waking from a good dream. transporting, immersive, lovely. 

Harry Potter and the Bisexual Awakening by @writcraft - 20k - E Harry is perfectly content being single, heterosexual and living in Godric's Hollow with his very clingy rescue dog, Snitch. When Draco Malfoy turns up on Harry's doorstep demanding that Harry teach him how to drive, things quickly become a lot more complicated.

first of all, i feel very seen by draco being a gay-who-can’t-drive. it’s called representation. but mostly i love the ease of harry and draco’s banter, a flustered harry discovering his sexuality, and the way this fic addresses biphobia. also very emo over this exchange: “I think I might be scared of you, but probably not for the reasons you think.” “Yes.” Draco stares at Harry. “I think I might be scared of you too.”

Forged through flowing water by @tedahfromtayla (an @hd-erised​ fic) - 40k - E When Hermione sets up a diplomatic mission to begin repairing the damage British colonisation did to Indian magical communities Harry isn’t going to pass on the opportunity to visit and help his family’s home country. Maybe he should have asked a few more questions about the personnel she had recruited for it before signing on because Malfoy surely has an ulterior motive to be there.

so much to love about this fic. the beautiful settings, from kolkata to mumbai, to the holi festival and colorful lively streets, to remote cave settlements and old intricate temples. it’s harry in the homeland, reconnecting to his family’s heritage and confronting the weight of imperialism in his history. it’s nipping the white savior complex in the bud. this part: That is what England left behind. That is what it still stands for, despite whatever mask of respectability and honour it presents. . .You don't get to step aside and let someone else deal with the mess. You have to listen and learn and then act, Malfoy, you need to learn how to fix your own mess. This is why we're here. my indigenous ass cheered. HP certainly sells the british fantasy but HP fanfic?? fuck jkr, fuck the crown. i love that this fic doesn’t romanticize england’s history. i love that we get to see the vast resilience and beauty of post-colonial india.

Purity Control by yrfrndfrnkly - 28k - T In which Harry tries to ignore his trauma with fantasy Quidditch but Malfoy's Thereness™ is distracting and all his classmates want to talk about are unicorns, virginity, and Muggle music.

tender 8th year fics where they go from bristly as fuck to understanding and soft 100% guaranteed to make me emo as hell. all the teens have traumas and no one wants to talk about it but eventually Things are Talked About. it’s good of the adults to finally notice. everyone just wants someone to hold their hand. and this part: “You’re the only person around here who’s a bigger mess than I am.” “I thought maybe we could be a mess together,” pls don’t look at me as i weep over their gentle empathy.

Advent, a comic by dustmouth - WIP - T It's Harry and Draco's first Christmas together and Draco is determined to live his full yuletide fantasy, come hell or high water.

dustmouth, patron saint of whimsical drarry. whose illustrations singlehandedly reinvented wizarding fashion. whose cheeky and tender comics are like a soothing balm to the utter depravity of this carnal world. harry and draco being domestic, draco’s xmas spirit brand being “traditional unhinged”!! extremely my shit. we’ll absolutely be reading this all december.

Little Spaces by @dracoladon and @lazywonderlvnd​ - WIP - E Draco's back from France and working on the spell damage ward at St Mungo's with Hermione, who invites him over for dinner. Without telling Harry. This is a roleplay, which means Harry is written by one author (lazywonderland) and Draco by another (dracoladon).

the switch in distinct character voices works so well for this fic!! tonally i feel like i'm watching an episode of the office. i personally love harry and draco being Pissed Off at how much they want to bone each other. the battle of the tapenade was the most riveting dinner scene i've read in a minute. clever, hilarious, emotionally tense. can’t wait until that inevitable moment post hate-sex when they’re gonna be like “oh noooo it’s a Heart Boner as well!! >:((” hell ya we’re subscribing for chapter updates.

Dragons Don’t Know Paradise by @teacup-tai​ - WIP - E In 2004, when Remus spends two scary weeks in the ITU due to complications of pneumonia and his HIV condition, Sirius walks around the house like a ghost and Harry finds comfort and strength in Draco through a chat in an online LGBT forum. Harry falls for him, but Draco has a lot of secrets and, before long, will need to come clean—even if he believes that no one is able to understand a dragon.

non-magical bookshop AU. remus and sirius’ relationship is a marvel. the ease of their affection with harry makes me so emo. draco’s friends being insistently present even as he tries to isolate himself. this is a story about acceptance, found families, and falling in love at a distance. the intimacy, the longing, the tenderness. what a fic!! i keep coming back to this part:...he looks at ease, inside his body, a body he needed to fight for. He’d made peace with his struggles and his scars. And Draco realises he wants that. He wants to be at ease inside his body, the body that now carries a virus. He wants to be at peace with his own existence. you hurt for draco so deeply but you get moments like these where he affords himself a kindness that feels foreign and it’s just!! the boys navigating grief and learning to be vulnerable. so good.

[inkandpen22]

Young Hearts Divided (5/?)

Pairing: Sirius Black x Female!Reader 

Warnings: fluff, underage drinking, mild smut, swearing?

Word Count: 2.7k

Part Summary: it’s a few days after Y/N received her horrible news. Since then, she’s been acting as though everything fine. When Gryffindor wins against Hufflepuff and everyone gathers to celebrate, everything comes to ahead. 

Masterlist

Growing antsy, I check my watch for the tenth time in the last half hour. Oh good, finally! Sirius is finally out of detention! I scribble down the last bit of my paper and start to pack up my things to leave the library. Lily and Marlene peer up from their work across the table.

“Are you okay?” Marlene breaks the silence.

“Yeah, just peachy!” I press my lips together as I shove my textbook into my bag.

“Y/N, you don’t have to act like you’re okay,” Lily tries to reason with me gently. “You’re dealing with something-”

“Everything is fine, Lil!” I snap.

Lily and Marlene jumps slightly at my sudden rashness. Comprehending what I’ve just done, I take a deep breath and fill with instant regret. It’s not my friends’ fault, I shouldn’t take it out on them.

“I made my decision,” I state calmly. “Now it’s done.”

I start to rise from my seat and place my bag on my shoulder. Checking my watch again, I realize that I actually have a few extra minutes, oh well. I don’t think I can sit here in this silent library for much longer.

“Where are you going?” Marlene questions hesitantly and glances between me and Lily.

“I’m supposed to meet Sirius in the courtyard,” I rush out.

Lily’s face scrunches in confusion. “What about James?”

“What about him? See ya!” I force a smile and head toward the door.

Now I’m certain Lily and Marlene are going to have a field day with worrying about me. 

________________________

Laying in the grass of the courtyard under the tree, Sirius and I just lounge around for most of the afternoon. I rest against the bench and Sirius baths under the sun. He surprised me with blackberries he stole from the kitchens on his way here. I’ve challenged him to catch them in his mouth. Even when he has the advantage of me dropping it directly above his mouth, Sirius doesn’t have the best coordination.

“No, a thousand percent! Heart is much better than The Runaways.” I agree as I drop another blackberry.

Sirius actually catches it, so i playfully applaud him. He pretends to bow, struggling to suppress his laughter. Rolling onto his side to face me, he grabs a handle full of berries from the pile on the towel beside me.

“Do you think you’d ever be in a band like that?” He asks.

I laugh, “could you see me in a rock band?”

“Yeah, sure,” he nods, dead serious.

“What?!” I nudge him on the shoulder. “Are you mad?”

“Mad about you...” He smirks cheekily, meeting my gaze with hooded eyes.

I roll my eyes at his flirtatious innuendo, pressing my lips together to hide my childish grin. I can feel my cheeks getting warm and it’s not from the heat of the sun. With a flick of my wrist, I pick up a berry from the pile and hold it up to his mouth. He glances at it and back at me, anticipating me moving it away. Hesitantly, he leans forward to take the berry in his mouth. His eyes remain locked on mine. Then, I hurry and pop the berry in my mouth with a snicker.

"Oh you're gonna get it now!" Sirius laughs.

He grabs me by the waist and rolls me over so that I'm on his lap. Relentlessly, he starts tickling me, knowing how much I can't stand it. I wiggle in his hold, but I know he's far too strong and I don't stand chance.

“Sirius stop!” I squeal.

“Sorry, can’t hear you!” He mocks playfully.

“Sirius!” I laugh nervously, trying to pry his hands away.

“Not the magic word," Sirius teases in a sing-songy tone. "But by all means keep screaming my name," he purrs.

“I don’t know it!” I plead, struggling to cease my laughter.

“Oh sure you do! Think, Gorgeous, think!” He snickers.

“Padfoot!” I blurt out the first thing that comes to mind.

“There it is!”

Sirius stops his attack and I relax beside him on the grass. My breathing slowly subsides as I pant. Rather proud of himself, Sirius watches me with a grin.

“You’re the worst!” I giggle, watching the clouds flow by as I catch my breath.

“You say that but you love me,” he winks.

I turn my head to the side and meet his gaze. "Most days," I admit quietly with a giggle.  

His face falls, "you what-”

“Y/N!” James's voice captures my attention.

I sit up to see him jogging over from the quidditch field with a smile.

“There you are, Darling! I’ve been looking for you," he greets warmly once he's closer.

Joining us, he sits on the bench beneath the tree and I crawl across the short distance to sit on the grass by him.  

“I’ve been here," I point out nonchalantly. "How was practice?”

“Decent. I’ve missed you today," he charms, rubbing his hand up and down my back.

“We saw each other this morning,” I snicker.

“Yes, but you were with Lily and Marlene. I hardly got to speak with you," he dramatically pouts like a child who lost his toy.

"That's what meals are for," I lecture.

I crisscross my arms on his leg and rest my chin on them, enjoying this beautiful afternoon. It's honestly the most perfect weather and spending it with my two favorite boys isn't too shabby either.

"I'm going to head out," Sirius announces, already to his feet.

I protest disappointedly, "but-"

"What's up mate?" James beats me to it.

Sirius shrugs, suddenly gloomy. "Nothing, just promised Remus I'd help him with something."

"Alright, see you at dinner then," James nods. "You're going to the game tonight right?"

Sirius mutters an agreement and glances down at me.

"I'll see you Y/N," he mumbles, offering me a weak smile.

I nod, "yeah, yeah most definitely!"

I don't want him to go. We were having so much fun. He turns to walk away and I mood is hindered. One minute we were having a blast, like how we were before... well before everything. Now, I'm just confused.

“Hey," James pulls my focus away from Sirius. "Excited for Hogsmeade next weekend?"

I hum, nodding my head enthusiastically. "It'll be a nice change of pace."

"I had an idea! After the game tonight, let’s go to the Astronomy Tower,” he suggests enthusiastically.

I shake my head, biting my lip to hide my grin. This boy is going to get me in trouble without a doubt.

"But what if we get caught?" I inquire wisely.

“I’ll bring my invisibility cloak,” he concludes without a care in the world.

I hum, thinking it over. If we do end up getting caught, that's my third detention this year. James better bring his cloak if I do agree to it.

“I’ll think about it.” I comply, not fully, but enough to satisfy the boy.

"Perfect," he leans down and plants a kiss to the top of my head.

__________________________________________________________

I do another shot of firewhiskey with Marlene and it hits me instantly, putting me over the edge. Gryffindor won today against Hufflepuff, so everyone's celebrating in the Common Room. The girls and I decided earlier today to dress for the occasion. I bought a new red leather skirt over the summer when Marlene came to visit me. I've yet to wear it and Marlene insisted I pair it with her yellow Gryffindor t-shirt she cut to a crop top.

James bloody brilliant on the field today. Then, Sirius kept making me laugh through the whole game, making sly comments the entire time. I thought Remus was going to bonk him on the head by the end.

Marlene tugs on my sleeve. "Let's dance!"

"And where shall we dance?" I stumble slightly, in my defense the room is a little spinny.

Marlene twirls her head, searching for a proper place.

"The study table!" I announce, right as the idea pops into my head.

"Excellent!" Marlene clasps her hands together and starts dragging me through the packed space.

She weaves between bodies, warning people to move. I laugh, she is by far the most wild girl I have ever had the pleasure of befriending.

"Oh well hello there!"

Someone new grabs my wrist that's free from Marlene and I'm yanked away from her. I land into someone's chest and I'm met with a familiar pair of glasses. He brings his hands around my waist, gliding over my exposed skin between the hem of my skirt and crop top.

"Hello to you too, Potter," I greet, draping my arms over his shoulders.

"And where have you been?" He purrs, leaning in to kiss me I suspect. 

Marlene pops up next to us. "Doing shots with me! Now, if you don't mind-" she takes my arm again "-Y/N here promised me we'd dance!"

"By all means," James hands me over. "I'll find you later," he assures me.

I offer him a wink right as Marlene tugs me away. She locks arms with me as she escorts me over to the table.

"Potter is mushy-gushy into you!" She shouts in my ear over the music.

"He's just a flirt!" I dismiss, not giving it a second thought.

"You're blind!" She teases.

Once we reach the table, I grab a chair and lead to climb onto the top. Heads around us start to turn and people start clapping.

Marlene shifts on her feet, swaying slightly as points to Mary who's in charge of the music across the room. "Mary! You better play Bowie right or I swear I'll make your skin blue for a week!"

Sweet, quiet, friendly Mary raises her hands in surrender and goes to put on Marlene's Bowie record that's always by the player. Marlene jumps up and down, getting herself energized as if she's about to perform at Wembley. The familiar sound of the album Marlene had me listen to the other night starts to echo through the Common Room.

"Yes! I love this song!" Marlene takes my hands and starts dancing with me.

We sway to the music and jump about the beat. I can't help but laugh at Marlene drunken dancing, it's just a mess. She raises our hands and waves for me to spin. My eyes fall shut as I twirl about the table top. I return the favor and she spins, nearly falling over. We burst out laughing, goodness this is just awful!

She pulls me closer to shout in my ear, "Potter can't take his eyes off you!"

I search the crowd of students decked out in their gold and red. Sure enough, I spot James leaning against the back of the couch speaking with Remus. He meets my gaze, a smile on his face as he mutter something to his friend.

"He's probably just wondering what the hell our dancing is!" I laugh.

"Then show him what you can really do," she urges with a mischievous grin.

I roll eyes and nudge her playfully, "no way!"

"Oh stop it! You know you can, I know you can, so do it," she encourages.

Marlene already starts climbing down from the table before I can argue otherwise. I glance around the room nervously for a second. Now standing at my feet, she waves for me to go on. A familiar rock song starts playing and I grin, I can work with this. Swaying my hips to the beat, I get in the groove of things. Marlene starts cheering and heads start turning. More cheering ensues as people start realizing what's going on. The attention encourages me to go on, I thrive off of it. If it weren't for the firewhiskey, I would never have the guts to do this. I slowly lower myself into a squat and roll back up flirtatiously, that earns a round of applause and cheering. I shake my bum playfully and send the crowd a wink.

A hand around my wrist yanks me down and Sirius stares at me furiously. He pulls me toward him and I'm flung over his shoulder. His arms keep me balanced as I hang upside toward his back. I swing as he marches through the crowd of riled Gryffindors toward the entry way.

"Sirius! Sirius let me down!" I swat at the back of his legs.

The raven-haired boy ignores my refusal and carries me out into the abandoned stairwell.

The Fat Lady gasps. "What on Earth are you doing boy?"

He ignores her as well, marching down the stairs to who knows where.

"Okay Sirius, I'm a grown person I can walk!" I whine.

"Then stop acting like a child," he snaps back.

"Me! You're the one who's been pouting around like a baby the past week!"

Despite my insult, he just keeps going like a bloody robot, march, march, march away! I press on his back to sit up right and peer over his shoulder to see where we're going.

“You can’t just carry people like a sack of flour!” I growl.

“You can when they’re acting insane!” He yells

I smack his back. “I’m not crazy! Take that back!”

His head whips around and he glares down at me. “No, you’re just an indecisive tease who doesn’t know what she wants!”

“Me the tease?!" I laugh. "You’re the biggest man whore whoever walked these halls!”

Abruptly, Sirius makes a sharp right into an alcove with a crumbled old stairwell and greenery growing in its cracks. He sets me down on my feet with a thud. I stumble for a second, but catch my footing.

“At least when I pick a girl I’m with only her! You’re switching back and forth between me and James like you’re the quaffle in a quidditch match! Pick a team Y/N!” He fires at me.

My head shifts forward in disgust. "What's that supposed to mean?!"

He scoffs, glaring up at me as though I'm lying. "Just quit it, you know exactly what it means!"

I shake my head, dismissing his digs. "You're drunk," I reason in a hiss.

He narrows his eyes at me sharply. "What if I am? So are you, Love, but I'm not the one making a fool of myself."

"I'm making a fool of myself, so what?! I don't care anymore!" I scream at him. “Why do you care?!”

His eyes grow wide. “Are you fucking serious?!” He laughs breathlessly.

“No, you-”

In a swift motion, Sirius pins me against the wall and presses his finger to my lips. “Don’t you dare bloody say it!”

I swallow my tongue, remaining still as Sirius keeps me pinned hard against the wall. His torso presses into me and he keeps his finger over my lips. The silence is consumed by nothing else than Sirius and I catching our breath quietly. I bury my eyes into his with a deep agitation. He's the most aggravating boy I've ever met in my entire life. His sharp stare could cut me clean if I weren't immune to it. Then, to my surprise, his face softens and his hand glides to my cheek. My heart starts to race, it was before, but this time it's more life an adrenaline rush.

"Did you mean it?" He whispers.

I swallow hard, "mean what?"

"When... when you said you love most days?" He stammers nervously.

Oh. I said that randomly, without much thought. I mean, we were kidding around. We was flirting so I tossed it right back to him, it’s what we do. I didn't think... I didn't know that he would...

"I mean if you didn't-" he rushes out, avoiding my gaze, "-it's fine! I'd understand, I was-"

As he stumbles over his words uncharacteristically and I see his nervousness consume him, it hits me like a ton of brick. I did mean it, every word. 

"Yes," I answer in a mutter, afraid my voice will give out on me.

His eyes meet mine frantically. "Wait what?!"

"Yes," I repeat, licking my lips anxiously. "I meant it..."

I feel as though my heart is in my throat and I find it hard to breathe. My eyes fall to Sirius's parted lips. I'm not familiar with this feeling, this urge. My eyes flicker up to meet his as his thumb brushes across my cheek. His dark alluring gaze pours into me like a starless night sky. Then, they glance down at my lips and Sirius shifts closer to me, if that's even physically possible. He leans in and hesitantly hovers mere centimeters from me. Acting on impulse, I finish the distance and press my lips to his. The sensation is unparalleled in this world. Sirius holds both sides of my face, deepening the kiss. I drape my arms over his shoulders and comb my fingers through his shoulder length locks. It feel so right and natural, as if we've been doing it our whole life. They just... Sirius and I fit together. He's like a guiding star in a world of darkness and I cling to him for life.

______________________________

Masterlist

Tags:  @hannah220506 @agirlwholovescoffee @a-classic-eye @devilstradegy @blackbirddaredevil23 @tay-mariee @blackpinkdolan @findzelda

[iliveiloveiwrite]

Paths, Avenues, and Secret Tunnels // S.B. (celebration fic)

Request: 6 & 13 from the fluff section with sirius black at hogwarts (location). 💛 - anon

Fluff 6: “Are you... Are you flirting with me?”

Fluff 13: “Compared to you: stars pale, and the moon dulls.”

A/N: Here’s your request! I hope you like! This one got away from me if I'm honest but I struggled with it so much in the beginning that I'm happy I found my flow. I don’t think I’ll be posting a fic tomorrow, I’m not sure yet, I have a ridiculously busy day so who knows! However, as always, I hope you all enjoy!

Pairing: Sirius Black x Fem!Reader

Warnings: mentions of an attempted harassment, swearing, self-defence, shitty parents, BUT THIS IS FLUFF, I PROMISE (there’s even a make out scene for you all)

Word count: 3.3k

Most weekends at Hogwarts School for Witchcraft and Wizardry could usually be spent in the neighbouring, picturesque village of Hogsmeade. Students, in their droves, descended upon the wizarding village – all ready to spent their knuts, sickles and galleons on whatever took their fancy in the array of shops that neatly lined the small high street.

For many of the students in Third Year and above, they relished the chance to spend a whole day outside of Hogwarts. You would have liked to have gone with them, but in a fit of anger your mother and father flat out refused to sign the yearly permission slip meaning that your visits to the small, sleepy village had been put to a stop.

You maintained fiercely that their punishment was unjustified. Your use of magic outside of school was perfectly reasonable considering that the man they had tried to set their daughter up with for an arranged marriage was nothing short of a creep that had to be put in his place.

Your reaction to the unsolicited attention of the repulsive man caused nothing smaller than a war between your parents and yourself. They felt humiliated that you should act such a way in front of a respectable, eligible gentleman who had taken the time out of his busy schedule to come to dinner and meet with you. You felt nothing short of fury at your parents for thinking you would ever go along with archaic traditions that should have died long ago.

It led to your parents taking the one thing that you looked forward to every school year away from you. In front of you, they tore apart the permission slip and threw it onto the fire where you watched as it turned to grey ash.

Your weekends were now spent either in the common room or the library; working on your homework, studying for an exam or simply reading to pass the time. By the fourth Hogsmeade weekend of the year, you had explored the castle enough to attract Filch’s unwanted attention, so you decided to reign in your exploits to the parts of the castle you knew were safest.

The common room had quickly become your safe haven after the third time you were questioned by Filch. Both the morning and afternoon of any Hogsmeade weekend spent reading over any work and napping periodically by the fire.

Stretching out on the couch, you finish reading over your notes from Potions, making a mental note to ask Slughorn whether you could borrow his classroom next weekend to test a theory that had come to you only a few moments ago. Another Hogsmeade weekend and you had made doubly sure to keep yourself occupied through it all – happy to see your friends off; already sick of their pitying looks.

“(Y/L/N)!” Sirius shouts; jumping the back of the couch and settling next to you.

“Sirius, how can I help?” You ask with a smile; turning to face the teenager you’ve known since the two of you were in nappies.

“I can’t help but notice that you haven’t been seen in Hogsmeade for a while now. One can’t help but wonder…”

You laugh, “I’m surprised it’s taken you this long to ask me considering our parents are like this,” You cross your fingers together; indicating just how close the two families were – Sirius’ mother visiting yours for tea at least three times a week.

“What happened?”

You sigh, clutching your book to your chest, “My parents cruel and unusual form of punishment.”

“What?”

You smile at the memory, “I jinxed the guy they were trying to marry me off to, so they tore up the permission slip in front of me and threw it onto the fire in a fit of dramatics.”

“Why did you jinx him?”

“I don’t want to say.”

“What did he do?” Sirius asks; voice low and lethal.

You sigh, “His hands tried to wander under the dining table. They didn’t get very bloody far before he was met with the finger removing jinx,” You huff proudly, “See how far he gets without the counter-jinx, the prat.”

“But you’re okay? You weren’t hurt?”

You shake your head; smiling at the care in Sirius’ voice. “I’m fine, I promise,” You reassure, “However, my parents thought it fitting to tear up my permission slip to Hogsmeade hence why I stay in the castle every weekend.”

Something in Sirius’ chest loosens at your words; happy to know that you’re okay and that you gave the creep what he deserved but he frowns at your parents response. “Did you explain to your parents what he tried to do?”

You fix him with a look that tells him of course you did, “They refused to listen; not someone like him,” Your voice takes on a higher pitch as you mimic your mother, “He’s such a responsible man from a wonderful family – I don’t know how you could do this to him.”

Sirius snorts at your impression; noting how accurate it is. “I’m sorry,” He murmurs.

You wave his apology with a swift movement of your hand, “I’ve gotten used to it now. You wouldn’t believe how on top of homework I am.”

He laughs, “Still, all the same.”

“I know,” You whisper.

Sirius pats your knee; he gestures towards the door with his head where his friends had walked through only a moment ago, “I better…”

You nod, “Of course. Go! Go – have a nice time.”

Sirius throws a small smile your way before he leaves the common room.  

For the first time in the five weekends you had been unable to visit the humble village; you had never hated your parents more.

-------

Sirius Black continues to play on your mind in a way he hasn’t done since your crush on him in Second Year when you were smaller and more naïve. The friendship between you was a lifelong one; families being so close that there was no other option but to get along as your mothers would drink tea and gossip and your fathers would conduct business in offices away from prying eyes and ears.

Your feelings for the elder Black sibling became news to you when you were turning ten years old. You found yourself wondering what it would be like to hold his hand longer and to hug him whenever instead of in greeting or in farewell – innocent daydreams of a child.

Nothing like the daydreams you now found yourself occupied with whenever you happened to find yourself staring at his mouth that little bit too long or when you zoned in on how his hands would run through his long hair and thought about what it would feel like between your fingers.

Your feelings for Sirius Black came surging back; knocking you breathless and leaving you feeling half way mad. He seemed to take over your mind; thinking of him constantly and not all the thoughts completely innocent. From a  simple smile in your direction, he had you feeling like a fool in love. From the smallest piece of attention he could give you, he had your heart in your throat.

Soon enough, you were admitting to yourself that your crush from Second Year had returned stronger than before and that there was no doubt about it. You were arse over tea kettle in love with Sirius Black.

He starts to spend his Hogsmeade weekends with you. Starting slowly; leaving the Marauders every now and then before eventually stopping joining them altogether. They all share a similar look one Saturday when instead of joining them at the door to the common room, Sirius joins you in your familiar spot on the couch.

Sirius waves to James, Remus and Peter as they depart for Hogsmeade; each of them shouting promises of bringing back sweets from Honeyduke’s as well as a surprise from Zonko’s. Sirius shakes his head at his friends before turning his full attention to you.

You smile softly at the disowned heir to the Black family fortune; repressing the growing urge to run your fingers through his hair, to kiss him senseless – to do anything with him really.

“What are the plans for today then?”

You roll your eyes, “You don’t have to do this Sirius, you can go be with your friends.”

Sirius waves his hand in a dismissive fashion, tutting, “I see them all the time. I live with them remember?” He shakes his head, “I like spending time with you.”

You chew on the inside of your cheek to keep your smile at bay, “I was thinking of finishing the book I’ve been reading.”

Sirius throws his head back with an overdramatic groan, “We did that last time!”

“And I’ve started a new book since then!” You sigh, “Like I said, Sirius, you don’t need to stay with me.”

“I want to spend time with you, but we don’t need to spend all our time here,” He says, gesturing to the dark red walls of the common room.

“I’m not bothered here. Every time I left the common room, Filch would always bother me.”

Sirius frowns, “Well we’re going out today,” He pats your leg, standing up, “Come on. Up you get, we’re off on a walk.”

“A walk?”

“A walk. An amble. A dawdle. That thing you do with your legs. Whatever you prefer to call it.”

You snort, “I know what a walk is, Sirius.”

“Then why ask?”

“Don’t make me regret coming with you.”

He grins at you, “Never, my dear.”

Sirius holds an arm out to you which you take; hooking your elbow through his. He sets off at a slow pace; holding the door to the common room open for you like the gentleman he was raised to be before leading you down the corridors.

With most students in Hogsmeade and the First and Second years occupied with a Quidditch training camp being run by the Holyhead Harpies, the corridors of the school are relatively quiet as you and Sirius continue your walk through the school that’s more of a second home rather than a place of education.

“Are your parents still angry?” Sirius asks out of the blue.

“I couldn’t care less though; it was self-defence and I’m happier for it. but you know them; there never was a couple who could hold a grudge like dear old mum and dad.”

“Oh, I don’t know. I reckon I could beat you.”

“How have you been since that night?”

Sirius looks off into the distance; mind immediately returning to the night he had walked out on his family, on Regulus. He had told you about when the school year had restarted after the Easter break.

“Good,” He eventually says, “I’m living with James’ family now. I’ve always been welcome at the Potters.”

You nod; happiness washing over you, “I’m glad you’ve found somewhere, I was worried when you sent me the one letter.”

“I wanted to send more,” He says, voice pained, “But I didn’t know if your parents would be nosy.”

“You were right not to,” You sigh, “Since they heard about our friendship rekindling, they keep looking at me as if I’m going to run any moment.”

“Would you?”

“Would I run away?”

He nods; pausing in his steps. You stop alongside him; thinking over your answer, “It depends. If I have to sit through another arranged dinner and possible marriage, then happily. If my parents suddenly see reason, then perhaps our relationship could improve.”

“How long have they been trying to marry you off?”

“Since I turned seventeen so just over a year since my birthday is one of the first of the year.”

Sirius chuckles humourlessly, “I’m glad I got out when I could.”

You nudge his shoulder, “All it means is that your life has taken a different path, Sirius. But I know whatever you decide to do, it will be the right path. It’s you walking it after all; it can’t be bad if you’re the one walking it.”

Sirius doesn’t reply to your words. He’s too overcome by your words to even think of replying. Out of the fallout from his family, the one thing he was concerned about was how it would affect your relationship with you but when he saw you after Easter and all you did was pull him into a tight hug, he knew that everything would be okay and that you would be going nowhere.

He doesn’t need to say the words out loud to accept them; he knows that he has fallen in love with you. Sirius realises with a jolt that he has most likely always loved you; only coming to the realisation since spending more and more time with you over your parental imposed school grounding.

Sirius doesn’t know what path his life is going to take; he has the Marauders and he knows he has them for life – very little coming between them to split them permanently. But through it all; through all of his late night worrying and upset, Sirius hopes and hopes that your life starts to wander down the same path as his.

By this time, you’ve circled the courtyard, ready to make your way to Hagrid’s Hut and beyond. Both happy enough to now spend the rest of your day dawdling around the castle; talking everything and nothing – simply spending the time with each other. The feelings that are harboured by the both of you simmer in the small space between your bodies; spoken yet unspoken.

The conversation from earlier, and the tension, has dissipated leaving behind a light, fun atmosphere that lets you see the best of Sirius. As a result, he has your heart thumping in your throat to the point where your pulse sounds in your ears.

It’s when he makes one comment about your closeness as children that has a particularly flirty tone and meaning that has your back straightening in realisation, “Are you… Are you flirting with me?”

“I might be…” Sirius comments with a smile.

“Not even you could be so cruel, Sirius, to bring up a childhood crush like that and play with my emotions.”

“What childhood crush?”

“Tell me you knew?”

At the blank expression on his face and the curiosity alive in his eyes, you let out a laugh, “I had the biggest crush on you when we were kids… even when we started Hogwarts I had a crush on you! You had to know, surely?”

He shakes his head vigorously, “I had no idea about it.”

“Oh…” You trail off.

“It was reciprocated if you were wondering.”

You sit up straighter, “It was?”

Sirius blushes; pushing his hair back from his face, “It was.”

Silence falls between the two of you. You’ve both stopped walking; steps paused in the middle of the corridor – hardly any sound around you other than the occasional hoot of an owl and a laugh from a young student. For what feels like forever, you simply stare at each other.

Your stomach turns with anticipation; readying yourself for the question you’re about to ask. Taking a deep breath, you break the silence with a single question, “And what about now?”

“Now?”

You nod, “Are those feelings reciprocated now?”

“They might be…”

“They might be, or they are?” You ask breathlessly; his words setting aflame the hope in your heart.

“They are. They really are.”

“Thank Merlin,” you gasp before pulling Sirius into a kiss by the hem of his t-shirt.

He responds immediately; taking control of the kiss as his lips glide against yours seamlessly. There could no arranged marriage, no relationship you could ever have that could compare to this one moment. In this one instant, all is defined, and you know that at almost eighteen, Sirius Black was to be the one for you.

A hand runs through his hair as the other anchors itself in his t-shirt; finally getting to feel his hair after so long craving it. With a slight tug of his dark locks, you smile against his mouth at the groan you elicit from the back of his throat. You file that piece of information away for later when it can be explored thoroughly. Entirely wrapped up in him, you give yourself over to him, letting his familiar scent of cloves and sweet orange wash over you.

Breaking the kiss, Sirius rests his forehead on yours for a moment, catching his breath and letting the contentment wash over him. He places kisses over your face – your nose, your cheeks, your forehead before finally pecking your lips in an open mouthed kiss.

You beam up at him; happy to have this moment with him in a quiet school where you won’t be interrupted by students, teachers, or ghosts alike.

With a wide grin, Sirius drops his hold of your waist to take hold of your hand and begins to lead you back through the corridors and to the moving staircases. Laughing, you match his pace as you run up the stairs, taking extra care for those that start to shift.

“Where are you taking me?” You ask with a loud giggle.

“It’s a secret,” Sirius says; turning quickly to face you. He places a finger to his lips in a hush. Then and there, you have to resist pulling him into another kiss from the look on his face; the utter delight spread over it combined with the intense mischief and elation alight in his eyes has your heart beating even faster.

Saying no more, you continue on your journey, letting Sirius guide you every step of the way. Arriving on the Third Floor, Sirius turns left, pulling you towards the statue at the end of the corridor. The statue of the One-Eyed Witch had always left you feeling uneasy; as if she was watching you with her one remaining eye – it seemed to follow you wherever you stepped.

Sirius stops in front of the statue; staring up at her for a moment before fixing his gaze on you. His hand comes up to brush your cheek, “Compared to you: stars pale, and the moon dulls. However, I know that your reaction to what I’m about to show you will even pale the brightest galaxy.”

You duck your head; uncertain of what to reply, feeling somewhat overwhelmed by the sheer emotion in his voice. Sirius tips your chin back up with a single finger, “Fancy going to Hogsmeade?”

You shake your head, “Sirius, I can’t. My parents, remember?”

“I remember just fine. Still, fancy going to Hogsmeade?”

“How?”

Sirius points to the statue of the one-eyed witch, “Through there.”

“Sirius, I love you but that’s a statue.”

He smirks, “It’s good to know you love me, but I need you to say the magic word.”

“And what’s that?”

Leaning close to your ear; so close that his breath is warm across your face, he whispers a single word. You find it hard to concentrate with him so close; his front pressed to your side. His lips brush against your ear and you let yourself arch into his touch as you try to focus on the word being whispered.

“Got it?”

Nodding your head, you step towards the statue. Your hand still wrapped in Sirius’, you whisper, “Dissendium,” Your voice barely louder than a breath.

You take a hasty step back when the hump to the witch opens, revealing a small slide leading into nothing but darkness. You turn to Sirius in awe; a large smile on your face, “How did you?”

Sirius simply shrugs, “I have my way, love. Now, Hogsmeade?”

Tightening your grip on his hand; tugging him into a long kiss, you can barely contain your elation with the teenager now pressing against you. Breaking the kiss but remaining close enough that your lips brush his as you whisper, “I’d go with you anywhere.”

*********

General (HP) taglist: @chaotic-fae-queen @obsessedwithrandomthings @harrypotter289 @kalimagik @heloisedaphnebrightmore @nebulablakemurphy @the-hufflefluffwriter @figlia--della--luna @bforbroadway @idont-knowrn @summer-writes @big-galaxy-chaos @black-lake-confessions @annasofiaearlobe @imboredandneedalife @levylovegood @mytreec @haphazardhufflepuff @teheharrypotter @chaoticgirl04 @accio-rogers @msmimimerton @izzytheninja @slytherinprincess03 @acciotwinz @kashishwrites

Sirius Black taglist: @approved-by-dentists @fific7 @susceptible-but-siriusexual

[halothenthehorns]

All in the Family

Warning for some blood and gore in this one

Chapter 145: Silver and Opals

HPHPHPHP

Something constricted over his face, pinching his nose shut and clasping down too close to his mouth, the edges of it just below his eyes and on the curve of his jaw, something pointed digging just beneath his chin on one side.* He breathed in the dusty scent right onto his tongue, there was no natural lighting in the gloom for him to see what was happening.

"Guys!" Remus squeaked at once, his hands scrambling over nothing of value as he reached up to try pulling it off. "Guys!?" There was a muzzle on his face, somebody had slapped a muzzle back on him!

"Somebody get me out of this thing!" He was already howling like an animal, he could hear the desperation in his own voice and he didn't care as his skin pulled and stretched and it wouldn't come off! This was no cruel prank, even Sirius would never do something like this as a joke.

"Sirius!? James?! Help!" He couldn't even back away as whatever it was held him in place by his face, and there was screaming all around him now. He couldn't even tell if it was his own. "Padfoot! Prongs! Pete?! Somebody!"

He could still breathe, it was neither tightening nor loosening, but that was somehow worse as his eyes adjusted to nothing. He forced them to remain open. They were not in the dimly lit hospital! He'd rather black out than live like this though. There was nothing but blank wall in front of him, he couldn't feel a single one of them around him, his breath was hot and kept blasting right back into his mouth with no escape. "Sirius! Sirius!" His nails were scraping dangerously against the ridges of his eyes, determined to rip it off by any means necessary.

Peter wasn't sure if those cursed robes once thrown out of Grimmauld place had been sent here, or if they weren't one a kind, but he wasn't getting the air to ask as the material wrapped tight around his throat. He gasped and spluttered in disgust, hearing the shouts and cries around him, but instinctively tried to vanish with a little pop that thankfully worked. Scampering a few feet away to be sure as they fell back harmlessly to the rack, he changed back and yelled in fright, spinning on the spot with no idea where to begin.

Regulus was hanging onto the handle of a black cabinet and stumbling dangerously, about to fall into something that seemed to have no true back and no telling what it would do.

James had tried the same trick, but Prongs's hooves slid uselessly on the ground as it held tight, so he changed back and lashed his hand onto an already trembling case full of jewelry that was about to topple him as the black cord wound tighter up his leg and tried to continue pulling him back towards a dangerously whirling device that glinted of metal even in the non lighting. He tried desperately to go for his wand while being torn in two, but didn't seem to be making much progress.

Sirius couldn't dare try the same, wrestling with a panther that had him ruthlessly pinned to the ground by its claws digging into his chest. Only a hastily thrown up shield charm was keeping his neck safe, and the glistening fangs shoved his wand's barrier a little lower to the ground every time.

Remus was losing his shit, he hadn't even gone for his wand to get out of that thing keeping him in place, it was too dark for even his sharp eyes to see exactly what it was.

A splattering of blood suddenly came from above and he looked up to see Frank yelling as a broom slammed him repeatedly into the ceiling, he'd bet anything he was incapable of letting go. He couldn't even spot the other two to know the horrors they were in.

Lashing out his hand to grab the back of Regulus' robes, he verbally threw a spell wildly at James while issuing a silent apology. It worked as it should, the severing charm cut straight through down to the bone, releasing him and a howl of pain as Regulus got his feet back under him.

All Prongs seemed to notice was that he was free and he immediately took in the same situation. Feeling guilty as hell for prioritizing, but Remus was screaming his lungs out so he was definitely more alive than Longbottom not even doing that anymore, Peter turned to Regulus and said, "mind your head."

He needed no further instruction as he once again over extended his magic, shooting Regulus up to the ceiling with far too much vigor. His arms had come up to cover his head on instinct, so when he found himself next to Longbottom he reached over to yank him off without any further hesitation as Peter tried to lower them back to the ground. The broom fell to the floor with an innocent clatter now that its rider was free.

"No James!" Sirius called calmly and clearly from where he was still wrestling with the cursed item like it wasn't salivating to rip his head off, hands straining to keep his shield up on the thin wood, every muscle visible in his arms and covered in sweat, a small puddle of blood pooling along his sides from the rivulets of cuts because of those hind claws. "Get Remus out!"

Moony had stopped calling for help and was now just screaming incoherently. Heeding Sirius by instinct alone, he changed course and rushed over to slash his wand through the air like a whip as he cried, "relashio!"

It worked thankfully, the bony hand fell away, the fingers uncurling with an ugly crackling noise. Remus finally staggered back clutching at his mouth and gasping in relief. James put a tentative hand on his arm in case he still lashed out in fear, watching closely to see the bloody scratches under his eyes in case that thing had done any worse to him, but Remus turned and held onto his arm still fighting back tears, his knees shaking as he held painfully onto James' elbow while he got his breath back. The few salty ones that leaked out must have stung terribly as they mingled with the blood, but he didn't let go to brush them away.

Prongs tried to be as reassuring as he could while he started dragging Moony back towards a still struggling Sirius, still limping as heavily as Remus' weak appendages. Peter was by Sirius' side now, but none of the spells he used were working anywhere past causing stuffing to fly as the creature continued.

There was a terrible look on Wormtail's face for whatever he was about to blast next to get that thing away, and James desperately tried, "finite," first despite his friend trying to cut off circulation to his arm.

The mock animal went still, and then zapped back to a plush sized toy. The desperation was still in Peter's eyes as he went towards the back, but James seized him and pushed him towards Regulus hovering over an unconscious Frank. "Walk him through some healing charms Pete."

Sirius struggled to his feet but was managing it well enough, so James sorrowfully wrenched his arm free and transferred a still hyperventilating Moony to him, hating to turn his back on the pair as Sirius tried to follow but couldn't as Remus latched onto his back and Padfoot groaned in pain. James was already rushing to the back alone despite leaving a thick trail of blood.

The moment he stepped through the curtain he heard the problem and snapped back to Prongs, which thankfully saved his human ears from the tinkling trance of music holding Evans and Alice in place, blood already starting to dribble from inside their ears. Their eyes were wide and glassy, and he huffed in frustration he could see nothing to turn off. Perhaps an intruder alarm, or something irreparable had broken upon their landing.

He stepped farther in, turned clumsily on the spot, and began nudging the two gently out with his horns while trying to favor three legs. They started moving, thankfully, but slow stumbling steps that made his limb feel like he was trailing a log behind him now that the adrenaline was starting to wear off. He feared that numbness, it could not be a good thing.

As the two stepped back into the rest of the store, it visibly started to wear off, and he changed back, collapsing to the ground in cold flashes of pain, using what little breath he had left to cast a healing charm. He passed out before he could see the bone, muscles, tendons, and flesh knit back together.

Lily and Alice screamed in tandem at the sight before them, burning their already ringing ears. Alice vaulted over the counter like it wasn't there to get to Frank and Lily dropped to her knees in a puddle of Potter's blood. She pushed his pants leg aside and saw he'd reduced it down to a deep cut instead, still oozing.

"He okay?" Sirius demanded from above her, turning a bit gray but holding his wand steady, clearly ready to use it on him if he didn't pass out first. Once again his chest was desecrated by multiple scratch marks, Lupin hanging onto his arms for life, as he watched her every move like that was no hamper at all.

"I got the rest," she promised. "He'll live."

Sirius released an erratic laugh that terrified her as she got her arms under his limp form and began dragging him out of the darkening pool for her own sanity, only managing a few feet where the counter stopped before she sat down beside him in exhaustion, the six of them sizing each other up and just taking in their next precious breath.

"So, who wants to find the book?" Regulus whispered into the following silence.

Sirius' laughter increased, his arms going behind him to hold Lupin in place as his eyes stayed on Potter.

"Stop that," she scolded in exhaustion. He didn't until she got wearily to her feet and used shaking fingers to prod gently along his chest, causing him to hiss in pain and eyes to finally flinch onto her properly. He gently pushed her hand back and finally turned his wand on himself, but stopped quickly and put it away.

He hadn't managed to get them all, and her hands trembled terribly as she got the last few to close while trying desperately to ignore the nausea of seeing the blood flow while he watched her with a steadfast expression.

She tried to go around him to Lupin who was still shaking and gasping, but Sirius crowded him against the wall and tightened his grip with a reproachful look as he jabbed his head at Frank instead. Lupin was taller, she could see the damage under his eyes, his nose was swollen, red, and dripping blood, but he didn't seem an immediate concern as he kept his face tipped towards the ceiling and kept breathing, so that wasn't a fight she was going to pick as she did so.

Pettigrew had walked Regulus through it for the most part, oddly as she'd expect him to do it himself, but he'd only gotten the worst of it and Lily tried her best to help the rest through. She still worried they hadn't done enough when Frank still lay passed out and looked pleadingly back at Potter and Black, who weren't in a position to help anyone in their state.

With a mental slap, she reminded herself she could do this! She wasn't going to let Frank suffer brain damage now! Fumbling desperately with the straps of her bag, she knew for a fact she could do at least one quick potion to help any internal swelling go down. Her hands continued trembling though as she started crushing ingredients on the filthy floor, worried about contamination, her mind starting to fog over as she kept wondering what if she did it wrong, what if she made this worse too?

Alice took her hand, her own flew to her shining amber eyes. "What can I do?" She demanded.

Her first instinct was still to push her away, to not let her guard down now, she could do this herself; but Severus' biting insult flashed through her mind to stop her. She was more than just a mudblood, she did deserve to be here! She pushed the empty cauldron towards Alice and told her in a remarkably steady voice, "start filling this with water, slowly. Only a cup at a time, I'll tell you when to stop."

She still patiently went through every step in her mind before she did it to double check herself, but the potion came out the exact right color as she ladled out the first spoonful and gently eased it into his mouth.

Peter got the nicked Weasley's potion kit out of Alice's bag and went back over to Prongs, nearly tipping the entirety but one drop of that blood restorative into his mouth before wearily handing it to Sirius.

"Thanks," Padfoot did not sound like he meant that as he tapped it, took a sip of his own, and pocketed it, but Peter nodded all the same as he hovered awkwardly.

"I'm sorry," he told them sincerely, though he wasn't sure how much Remus was listening.

"You should be," Sirius clearly meant that, and Peter winced. "Hell Peter, you nearly cut his leg off, what were you-"

"Guys," James groaned from their feet. They glanced down to see he looked every color of awful, but he was blinking dazedly up at them.

Sirius tried to bend down on instinct so he didn't have to crane his neck so far, but Moony still refused to let go and Sirius was starting to look a little flustered as the realization kept hitting him he couldn't help both at once. He was far more angry at himself than he'd ever let anyone see. Only this damning fact had stopped him from telling Evans to back off in the first place.

James didn't seem to want much help anyways, pushing Peter's hands away until he was leaning comfortably against the wall so he could see every corner properly, but he still had no energy to use the most minor of spells. Even his voice came out rough, but kind as he looked at Peter and said, "thanks mate. Everyone's okay, that's the important part." Frank was starting to stir as well, and the girls were dabbing a bit of that potion as far into their own ears as they reasonably could.

"I am sorry," Peter still insisted, but James waved him off with a faint smile.

Sirius was done being nice though. "James didn't try to cut Remus' face off to-"

"He did good Sirius," James repeated firmly now, frowning up at him as best he could from the floor, but he knew Sirius could hear it at the very least. "Who knows what the hell anyone else would do, grab the book? Freeze up? Can't you just be grateful?"

Prongs really meant that, and Sirius watched him sadly as he realized he didn't feel the same. It was the principle of the matter, the instinctive magic he'd heard each of them use underneath Remus' pleas for help. There was a fracture now when he looked at Peter he decided he was done trying to fix for James' sake.

During those three weeks he hadn't been speaking to any of them, Peter had never crossed his mind. Going back to Grimmauld hadn't even crossed his mind, he'd considered living in the Forbidden Forest for the summer without a second thought to Regulus. Only because of all of this mess was he even making more of an effort to involve himself with him, but he'd spent every waking hour wishing he could talk to James again, trying to pretend Remus had just over reacted and would want to come talk to him any day now, forcing himself to respect Moony's wishes and not start the conversation.

He'd been in the wrong, and he knew that now, he still felt the guilt of those actions every time he looked at Remus. He'd done Peter wrong by viciously over reacting to this future, but he'd tried what he could to make amends for that. He didn't hate Peter or Regulus, but he was done trying to make it more.

"Sorry," Peter whispered one last time.

"Yeah, so am I," Sirius stated, but there was something wrong with the delivery. There was a sincerity in there that did not lean towards an apology Peter suddenly flat knew he didn't want to know the meaning of.

James swallowed at the following silence and said, "Maybe I'll try losing an eye next, get out of here looking like Moody!"

Sirius got a grudging laugh and played along like nothing had happened. "First Harry, now him, you trying to mimic everyone in this future mate?"

"Just the cool people," he grinned.

Peter sighed in relief when Regulus summoned the book to get them out of this place and went quickly back over to him. James watched him go with a deep ache of loss as he gingerly stepped over the thick blood still covering most of the floor.

"Silver and Opals," Regulus said clearly and more calmly than Sirius would have given him credit for, as traumatized as he still looked glancing around at every single thing and even the floorboards like they were still going to be attacked any moment inside the rest of Borgin and Burkes. He hadn't been able to see what Regulus survived, but guessed it as he particularly kept eyeing that black wardrobe.

Both Black boys had been in here on multiple occasions well enough they recognized the store now that their eyes had adjusted to the gloom and Evans had lit her wand tip for light. It glinted repeatedly off the metal fan still spinning lazily, the edges razor sharp as a blade and brushing a pleasant breeze across them all, its cord like a dead snake not stopping the movement. Sirius couldn't tear his eyes away from its progress, never ceasing the whole chapter.

Peter was back over here, so Regulus felt safe enough to keep his eyes mostly focused on Harry's speculation as he did a silent one of his own. They were all flinching away from the jewelry case and wondering if they were finally going to hear what Malfoy had bought from this very place, and who it was going to be used on.

Katie Bell, unintentionally, as she'd been the delivery but not the target before it went wrong. Regulus took in every detail he could even as terrifying as it was to describe the sequence of events. All of them spent a very long time checking every spot in here with only their eyes to make sure that necklace wasn't available now, and even still never looked at anything for too long in fear it would curse them next.

Sirius was still practically supporting all of his weight as Remus continued to lean into his back, hands holding tight to his upper arms as if restraining Sirius from doing something instead of himself, which was falling to the floor, face still turned away to breathe in freely even as his fingers held tight. Sirius had to fight the urge to offer him a piggyback ride his knees were still shaking so bad.

"Hey, Remus," Sirius forced his hands to stay in place at his side, letting Remus cling to him in whatever way he wanted in front of the others. Keeping his voice soft and gentle, if James heard he wasn't giving it much notice as he continued listening in worry as McGonagall was caught up to speed, and Malfoy's detention ruined his only suspect. "If you're so worried about being distant, then why not knock it off? Nobody's holding any of this against you."

It was maybe a little hysterical, the laugh that came out of him. That Sirius decided to try talking to him like nothing had happened in between.

Remus let his forehead rest against the back of his shoulder now, he couldn't smell the sweat and blood through his burning nose but he could feel it. Finally his lungs began to even out as he pressed a kiss where none could see as he soaked in his meaning. What Peter had done was the ultimate betrayal of this future and James was still trying to work with him. Ironically Sirius was also reassuring him of the fear Padfoot knew nothing about. Sirius wouldn't go anywhere even if Remus did confess his crush.

He was still reluctant to do so, traitorously letting his mind play him now that he could pretend this was going to last forever, there was nothing in these environments to stop him keeping Sirius to himself. He'd have to tell Sirius when they got back to school, he still knew himself well enough he might murder the first person who made a pass at Sirius in front of him, or Sirius himself, and not be able to explain himself. He had time to do that though, ages of this book left plus the next, and possibly even more if they kept cycling through Harry's life.

It was probably the delirium in him that suddenly found he never wanted it to end.

HPHPHPHP

*If you would like to feel what Remus went through, pinch your nose with either hand using thumb and forefinger, the latter of which and middle finger will rest under your eye, while your ring finger and pinky would sit below your jaw digging in. Now imagine that as a skeleton holding on and not letting go while your other hand tries pulling that off.

The one inspiration I take from the movies, and it's that creepy thing. I cringe every time the scene's coming even though I know it is, and it just grabs Harry's wrist!

[corinnesamuels]

Guarding the Gates, Chapter 9: Discretion is Such a Valuable Tool

Shoutout to the AMAZING @the-dream-team for creating this for me! Gives the fic a lil razzle dazzle, don’t you think?

A good old patronus soul mate trope to get the blood flowing, Remus has a hard time, and Lily and Sirius confront old friends.

In the weeks following James and Miranda’s breakup, there had been speculation amongst the gang about what that meant for Lily and James. For the two people in question, however, there was no indication that anything would be changing. They laughed at the same jokes, and the time they spent in person still had the same cadence. They were  friends , and the two of them reinforced that dynamic whenever asked. Secretly— irritatingly —Lily reinforced it with herself every time she saw that lopsided grin, which seemed to be making more and more of an appearance lately. 

It was as if the breakup had broken a dam inside of him, and now he joked more and laughed with less reservation. The glint in his eye that appeared when he was contemplating mischief had reappeared. Every day he became more and more like the version of him she’d once known. Sirius had made similar observations, saying how great it was to have his friend back at full force. 

Lily had loved getting reacquainted with James when she returned to England, but to see those parts of his personality return warmed her from the inside. He seemed happier, more free. Lily loved the way it looked on him. Except for when she didn’t. This more robust version of an adult James was a lot for Lily to take in. His personality was simply overwhelming some days, not because he was being obnoxious, but because it was almost impossible not to be drawn to him. It threatened to disrupt the precarious balance that her emotions currently maintained. Lily couldn’t risk disrupting that balance, so she made it a point to carry on the same life she had been living, and her occasional recreational dalliances helped a great deal.

Except for when they didn’t. Like today, when Lily realized that she’s going to have to let go of Terry.

It’s a shame, really. He’s a nice bloke and gets the job done well enough. But Lily has noticed that he seems to be straying from their original arrangement. He usually either left first thing in the morning after their liaisons or stayed just long enough to make and wolf down a quick breakfast. Lily had appreciated it because, as her friends love to point out, she’s terrible at cooking.

But lately, he’s attempted, thrice now, to stay into the afternoon. While Lily doesn’t want to be rude or harsh, this just isn’t what they signed up for. Especially not on a day when she is already running a little late to an Order meeting. He jokingly asks why she seems like she’s in a rush and hints at not believing that she really had somewhere to be. 

It takes everything she has to remain calm.

“Nothing about our arrangement requires me to share my daily schedule.” She’d said at close to noon that day as she hastily put on her shoes. She waved her wand toward his belongings, and they began hurtling at him faster than she’d intended due to her irritation, but he’d gotten the hint after that. 

When she arrives at the meeting a few minutes late, she waves off Marlene and Dorcas’ concerns with a “don’t ask” and a resigned rise and fall of her hand before jumping into the agenda.

The Order of the Phoenix functions well. Dumbledore has instituted a complex but subtle system for meeting locations, dates, and times and spends early meetings going over spells and skills that might be useful for the days ahead. Dumbledore picked most of them because they had excelled during their time at Hogwarts, but certain forms of magic were usually beyond what even the brightest seventh years managed before their time at school ended.

And so, they found themselves assessing the talents of the group and ways to maximize them. It was a well-known fact that The Marauders were good at stealth due to their ability to cause mischief as students. So Dumbledore tasked them and the Aurors of the group with assisting the rest in learning advanced magic related to stealth and concealment. “You lot must not have been too good at being stealthy if you got caught so often.” Dorcas quips during one meeting. The four men looked at each other and grinned. 

“Meadowes,” Sirius tuts. “We very rarely got caught on accident, love.”

“You can’t be legendary if no one knows your story.” James chimes in with a mischievous glint in his eye. “Sometimes you have to let yourself get caught for the greater good.”

“The most legendary thing about the two of you is your detention records.” Marlene smirks, looking over to Lily before rolling her eyes. 

“Was that supposed to contradict what I said?” James asks with a laugh. Remus does his best to cover up a laugh of his own.

Lily, Marlene, Caradoc Dearborn, and Elphias Doge led the group in potions making. In addition to maximizing stores for members to have available to them, Dumbledore also had them work on potions whose brewing processes made Lily feel as if she’d run a marathon once completed.

Little by little, Lily began learning the strengths of various members of the Order of the Phoenix. Most everyone in the group was an accomplished dueler, particularly the Prewett twins and Edgar Bones. People like Hestia Jones, Sturgis Podmore, and Emmeline Vance were able to navigate Ministry circles to subtly gather information that employees were too afraid to say around Mad-Eye Moody, Frank, and Alice. But nothing surprised Lily more than discovering that the slovenly thief Mundungus Fletcher was a member of the group  because  of the fact that he was a thief.

“Dung was dead helpful while we were in school.” Peter says in Mundungus’ defense after one meeting. Lily, Marlene, and Dorcas let their eyes travel from Peter to his friends with raised eyebrows, waiting for confirmation.

“Let’s not go into the details, Peter. They aren’t necessary at this juncture.” Sirius cuts in. When Lily’s face still holds traces of mild judgment, Sirius rolls his eyes. “Oh, don’t look like that, Red, you were a spy. Surely you saw worse than a thief.”

Lily had, of course, seen much worse. “Yes. Usually, the kind that were sober while on the job.” 

“It’s helpful to have someone in a group who can acquire…things of questionable origin.” Remus says diplomatically. “Especially information.”

“Yeah, it makes sense for Sturgis, Hestia, and Emmeline to do reconnaissance at the Ministry.” James replies. “But they can’t very well walk through Knockturn Alley and ask pointed questions without looking suspicious, can they?”

“How do we know that he’ll even remember what he learns from poking around in Knockturn?” Lily asks skeptically as she watches Mundungus falling asleep in his chair. “Surely you don’t think he’s going to go sober?” 

The gang takes a moment to observe Mundungus with her. It is a valid question they hadn’t considered.

“Pensieve, probably.” Sirius says finally. 

“Ah.” The others hum and nod in agreement before going back to their tasks.

In one particular meeting, Dumbledore decides to cover communication methods between members.

“I am sure you will find that we need ways to communicate with each other that owls and the Floo won’t be able to accommodate.” He says. “You may need to send a message quickly, and with the way Lord Voldemort’s ranks are growing, we may soon find the Floo Network being monitored surreptitiously. Muggles have a delightful invention called the ‘telephone.’ You pick up a receiver and can be in conversation with an old friend in mere seconds.”

Lily and Dorcas exchange grins, thinking of the summers they spent in the muggle world, on the phone with Mary, giggling like the schoolgirls they once were.

“It inspired me to create something similar,” Dumbledore continues, “and after perfecting it, I am ready to teach it to each of you. How many of you are familiar with the Patronus Charm?”

Various sounds of mild shock reverberate across the room as members of the Order exchange confused looks with each other. “Sir, I’m sure most of us have heard of it, but from my understanding, Patronuses don’t talk, do they?” Lily asks, voicing the confusion of the group.

“Not until recently.” Dumbledore replies. “As I said, I’ve perfected the method.”

A shocked James lets out a huff of air before catching Lily’s eye. She knows that his thoughts echo her own.  How in the fuck was Dumbledore so good at magic? Who would even think to take that charm and make it twice as useful and three times as difficult?  Lily shakes her head and lets out an exhale of her own, and he grins at her. 

It takes more effort than it should have for her to pull her eyes away from that grin.

“There are fully-trained Aurors who can’t even pull off a corporeal Patronus.” Frank says from the back of the room. “And you’re saying that you’ve amended it in some way?”

“I am.” Dumbledore says patiently, as if the people in front of him aren’t intimidated and shocked by the idea of performing this level of magic.

“Stop gawking and get a move on.” Moody growls from his section of the room. “Being afraid of a charm isn’t going to help you learn it.” He mumbles about the lack of gumption witches and wizards show nowadays.

At this, and with looks of slight trepidation over their shoulders toward Moody, the members of the Order of the Phoenix began working on casting the Patronus charm. Lily, who had always been adept at Charms, was able to produce a slight mist by the end of the session. Frank, Alice, and Moody could already produce non-corporeal Patronuses and worked on getting them to take shape before they left to return to the Ministry.

“Duty calls.” Alice says with a wave as they leave. 

Lily is still working on producing more mist when she sees James frustratedly struggling to produce even that. She smirks at him as she lets her mist float into his line of sight. “And to think you used to say you were better at Charms than I was.”

James cuts his eyes at her, irritated at not being able to gloat at the moment. “I used to say I was  just as good  as you at Charms, Evans. And I am.”

“We’ll see.” She says with a shrug before turning back to her Patronus. 

James rolls his eyes. “Professor Dumbledore, what transfiguration-related spells do you have for us?” 

“Grow up.” Lily retorts.

“Get a room.” Sirius grumbles with an eye roll of his own. Marlene laughs from her place next to him. 

“If they start acting like they did in sixth and seventh year, I’m going to bring up the idea of shoving them in a broom closet again.” Marlene says.

“And this time, we’ll actually do it.” Sirius replies dryly.

Lily’s words lit a fire in James that he hadn’t felt since playing Quidditch before his mother died. He always had thrived on competition. So after the Order meeting, he goes to three different bookstores and buys all the books he can find on the theory behind casting Patronuses. Sirius scoffs at this initially, but he, Remus, and Peter soon end up joining James in the sitting room of the manor, pouring through books and pages. They hadn’t made this much of an attempt to learn something from a textbook since James, Sirius, and Peter became animagi. And while the others may just want to learn because Dumbledore requested it, James is not only determined to produce a corporeal Patronus, but to produce one before Lily does.

To his frustration, Lily just barely beats him. 

They had been reviewing the spell at the beginning of an Order meeting, and they’d both been producing dense mists, just starting to take shape before dissipating. James closes his eyes, calms his nerves, and takes a deep breath to regroup before attempting the spell again, but before he can focus on his happy thought, he hears her excitement across the room. Knowing that it could only signal one thing, he curses under his breath before turning to see the inevitable.

He curses again, audibly and disbelievingly this time, when he sees the Patronus ambling across the room. Four legs, hooves, ears upright. In his shock, he doesn’t realize the strange looks he’d gotten from the people standing closest to him.

“Are you alright, James?” Peter asks.

But James is back in time, recalling a passage he’d read in one of his books while feverishly trying to pin down the charm—the one he and Sirius had joked about before ultimately ignoring it and going back to working out the incantation. 

  There is a belief amongst wizards that similar Patronuses are shaped by deep feelings one may have for another. Indeed, many agree that witches and wizards with the same or similar Patronuses may even be soulmates.

  James doesn’t answer Peter as he watches Lily’s doe move about the room and returns to her. She looks at it fondly and drifts her fingers along its silvery glow before it bows and disappears. He notices that Lily still has that look about her that she’d had when she was introduced to new magic in school—reverence mixed with the pride of accomplishing something new. He can’t help but grin at her across the room, nodding his head in salute as she smiles back and shrugs one shoulder before hugging Dorcas happily. It reminds James of all those days he used to watch her in classes…when they’d joke during their rounds…how she’d hugged him and smiled in a way that lit up the room after Gryffindor had won the quidditch cup during their last year…

He’d known it would work this time before he even recited the incantation. “Expecto Patronum!"

Read the rest at ao3!

Start from the beginning

[dinosaurs-last-day]

Of Witches and Long Lost Families

This is my gift for @because-were-fam-ily for the @sanderssidesgiftxchange 2020!

Their prompt that I used was magic au, and I also added an nonbinary character since another one of their prompts was nonbinary coming out. 

Relationships: platonic dukeceit, eventual romantic intrulogical, familial dukexiety and familial ancxeit. 

word count: 5004

warnings: ask to tag

Witches, demons, angels, elves, fairies. All considered mythical creatures to humans, all very real. Most of them live in hiding, unwilling to prove their existence to the non-magical humans, sometimes even fearful of what people would do if they found out the truth. 

Janus was one of these magical beings, they were a witch. Like many magical and mythical beings, they preferred to avoid humans, opting to live in the woods that were deemed “haunted.” Because so many magical beings lived in those woods, humans tended to stay away, which led to it being a magical paradise. 

Janus lived by themself, spending most of their time perfecting potions and magical spells. When they weren’t working, they were often with their best friend, Remus. 

Remus was a demon, a cruel and vulgar species. Remus didn’t live in the forest, he chose to live in the pits of hell, which suited him just fine. Everything about Remus was crazy, from his wild sense of clothing (billowing black shirts with tight leather pants) to his wild purple makeup and dark green demon horns. Remus’ favorite pastime was coming up from Hell to terrorize humans in the village closest to the forest. 

Janus was almost the exact opposite. They were calm and careful, full of grace and poise. Janus dressed with elegance, wearing long cloaks and flowing skirts that were practical but still had that dramatic flair that Janus was known for. They wore satin yellow gloves, which served no practical purpose, the gloves were purely because Janus liked them. 

Together, the two friends were a force to behold. Remus’ chaotic whimsy and Janus’ calculated cunning worked together better than most people would expect. Most of the time, their schemes were directed at humans who had wandered into the forest or offended the magic folk. Janus insisted on using their powers for protective purposes only, but Remus was known to convince them on pulling a cruel prank every once and awhile. If the two weren’t terrorizing humans, they were probably terrorizing Remus’ rival and brother, the angel Roman. 

On the particular morning our story starts, Remus had crawled up from Hell, bored and hoping that Janus could entertain him somehow. He wanted to go and trick his brother or his brother’s friend, but Janus insisted that he was too busy working to go do any of Remus’ crazy ideas. So Remus just sat around Janus’ cabin, moping, complaining and summoning hellhounds to keep him entertained. 

“Janny! Why must you insist on being so serious! We’re occult beings damn it! If we want to have a little fun, we should be allowed to have fun!” Remus draped himself across Janus’ couch dramatically, trying to tear Janus away from their work. Janus rolled their eyes and continued to stir the bubbling brew in their cauldron. 

“I’m sorry Remus, but I am working. I have to get this potion ready for Logan.” 

Remus perked up. “Logan the elf?” Janus nodded. It was common knowledge that Remus was romantically interested in the elven man for a long time. Logan himself was the only one who seemed unaware, but he wasn’t known for being the best at reading social cues. He was the most socially awkward elf that Janus had ever seen, which was saying something since elves were known for being an incredibly social race. 

“Are you delivering the potion today?” Remus asked. Janus nodded once again. 

“You can tag along if you promise to behave,” Janus told their friend. Remus agreed wholeheartedly that as long as they were going to visit Logan, he would stay out of trouble, specifically, he would refrain from terrorizing Roman. 

“Well then let’s go!” Remus was ready to bounce out the door but Janus held him back, reminding him that they had to wait for the potion to be done first. Remus sighed and flopped down on Janus’ couch, waiting impatiently as he summoned another hellhound and began to play with the giant demon dog. 

“It’s done,” Janus called, watching as Remus zoomed towards the door and out into the open air. Janus laughed and followed their friend outside, smiling as the sun peeked through the trees. 

“Let us be off!” Remus cried dramatically, leading the way. The two headed through the woods towards the more populated area, where Logan lived. They were still a ways away from the town when they heard a rustling in the bushes.

Janus stopped to listen, expecting some sort of rabbit or little fairy to pop out of the brush, but nothing appeared. Remus was starting to get bored, so he began to pull Janus down along the path. 

The moment Janus’ back was turned towards the bush, more rustling came and out appeared a young teenager. He was tall and skinny, his vivid violet eyes hidden by the hood he wore over his head. The boy froze when he saw Janus and Remus. 

Remus was the first to move, diving for the boy. The boy screamed and held out his hands to keep Remus from flying straight into him. 

“Remus no!” Janus yelled. Remus stopped mid flight, suspended in the air as he stared at Janus. The boy went to run away but Janus muttered a spell to immobilize the boy. The boy struggled against the magic for a moment before seeming to give up. Janus walked forward, motioning for Remus to come and stand on the ground. 

“What are you doing in the forest, dear boy?” Janus asked, standing in front of the boy. The teenager’s skin was a tan color, partly from being out in the sun and partly because of its natural shade. 

“I was running away,” the boy said through gritted teeth. He was glaring at the two mythical beings in front of him, shifting his eyes between the two, unsure of who was the bigger threat. 

“Janny, I wanna feed him to my hellhound!” Remus whined, tugging at the witch’s arm. 

Janus shook their head. “No, we’re not killing him.” Both Remus and the boy seemed shocked. 

“Why aren’t you going to kill me?” The boy asked. “Not that I don’t appreciate it or anything, but he’s a demon,” his glance flicked over to Remus for a moment before returning to Janus. “And I’m assuming you’re a witch. And I’m in your forest.” 

“Correct, Remus here is a demon, an annoying one too. And yes, I am a witch. My name is Janus. 

“Now, as for why we aren’t going to kill you, even though you are in our forest. I guess you spark my curiosity. You said that you were running away, why?” 

The boy looked at the ground for a moment, seeming to consider if he should tell his captors.

“Be honest now, or I’ll let Remus do as he pleases with you. I won’t stop him if he tries to feed you to his army of hellhounds.” Remus clapped his hand in excitement. The boy gulped and looked up.

“I hated it there, the village I mean. I don’t have a family and basically the only reason they kept me around was for working. I don’t know where I’m going, just not there.” 

Janus thought for a moment. 

“What’s your name kid?” The boy seemed surprised that Janus had even cared to ask, but Janus just stared at him. 

“Um, it’s Virgil.” 

“Well Virgil, if you don’t know where you’re going, how do you feel about becoming a witch? Having an apprentice would be nice, an extra set of hands and commany for when Remus is too busy terrorizing someone.” 

Remus gasped from behind Janus, but they focused on Virgil, waiting for a response. Virgil gulped and nodded.

"I'll become your apprentice. Anything to not be fed to a demon's pet dog." Remus growled, but Janus ignored him. With a few words in an ancient language, Virgil was released from the spell and collapsed to the ground.

"Remus, I'd like you to make the delivery for me. I'll be walking Virgil back to my cabin. We can't have anyone else see a human in our forest." Janus commanded, handing Remus the potion. “And please don’t make Logan uncomfortable, he is a valued customer.” 

“Fine, but only because you asked so politely,” Remus said, running down the path, glass vial in hand. Janus sighed, they knew that it was highly unlikely that Remus would actually respect Logan’s boundaries, that’s just how Remus was. 

They turned back to the teen who was still sitting on the ground. Virgil was staring up at Janus, his face expressionless. 

“Why did you save me?” He asked.

“I have no idea what you are talking about. Now follow me.” Janus headed back towards their cabin, allowing Virgil to follow just a few steps behind him.

“You offered me the option to live. I’m human, why would you do that?” 

“I don’t know.” 

“You don’t know?”

“No, I don’t know. Something about you draws me in, interests me. But I’ve yet to put my finger on what that something is. I intend to find out though.” 

“So I’m some sort of experiment?” 

“If you insist on looking at it that way, then sure. But I think of it as an assistant with an interesting past that I intend to find out. Why do you keep asking, would you prefer death? It can be arranged.” 

Virgil stopped in his tracks. “No, I prefer this.” Janus turned around, facing the boy. 

“Then follow me and stop asking so many silly questions. Questions are for learning.” They turned back around and listened to the sound of Virgil’s feet hitting the dirt path as the boy followed along.

They approached Janus’ cabin, Virgil silently taking in the entire forest. When the two walked through the front door, Janus allowed Virgil to walk around and look at everything. They noticed how Virgil seemed to hang around the storage closet where Janus kept most of their potion ingredients. Virgil was inspecting the different labels, sometimes silently mouthing the names of the different herbs. 

Remus came storming into the building right as Virgil was settling down on the couch next to Janus. 

“I’m back!” He yelled in a sing-song voice. “Did ya miss me? How’s our new friend doing?” 

Janus looked to Virgil, who seemed surprised that he was expected to answer.

“Um, I’m doing fine I guess. As fine as a dude can be in this situation.” 

“You going to lay down some ground rules for him, Janny? So if he breaks them, I can feed him to my hellhounds?” Virgil visibly paled at the mention of the demon’s dogs, but neither of the adults paid him any attention.

“Yes, ground rules. First of all, don’t touch anything without permission. We don’t want you to accidentally cause an explosion. Second of all, you can’t leave my property without one of us, that’s for your safety. My garden is open to you whenever you want but outside my fence, if we aren’t there, we can’t protect you from any magical being you stumble across. And lastly, if I happen to have a customer over, it’s probably best that you stay upstairs. Again, this is for your own safety.” Virgil seemed to relax when he realized that the rules weren’t as bad as he originally thought. Remus pouted a little, realizing that he couldn’t actually feed the teenager to the hellhounds with these rules, but he knew better than to argue with Janus. 

“So I’m not a prisoner?” Virgil asked. 

Janus shook their head. “We’ve already discussed this, you are an assistant. And I’d like to make it clear that if you decide that magic isn’t your thing, you’re free to leave, go wherever you want. But I will not protect you.” 

“If you want to leave Jan’s boring potion making lessons, feel free to join me,” Remus said, sliding next to Virgil. Virgil laughed awkwardly.

“Join you?” 

“Gimme your soul and you’ll have everything that I have! Become a demon! It’s lots of fun, I promise.” 

“No trying to convert my assistant Remus. I doubt the boy is ready to give up his soul just yet.” 

“Yeah, I think I’ll keep my soul for now. I kind of like it.” 

Janus showed Virgil to the room that he would be staying in and told him that they would begin his lessons in witchcraft first thing in the morning. Right now, Virgil needed sleep. Janus insisted that it had been a very busy afternoon and that practicing magic while not being fully rested was a dangerous game. 

~

The next few weeks went by in a blur to Janus. What stood out to them about living with Virgil was how easily the teen picked up magic. It was like a second nature to him, Janus couldn’t help but wonder if Virgil actually had some mythical ancestry in his past that maybe, he didn’t know about. 

Virgil seemed to enjoy learning magic too, he was constantly asking questions about whatever Janus was working on and reading some of Janus’ old spell books in his free time. Remus wouldn’t stop bothering him about selling his soul, but now it was more of a joke, the subject didn’t bother Virgil as much.

And Virgil was really good at following Janus’ rules. He never went past the gates, which he claimed the very idea of heading out alone made him extremely anxious, and he always stayed in his room when there was a visitor, who was usually Logan. Virgil did spend a lot of time in the garden, choosing to read in the sun and warmth of the forest. 

One day, while Virgil was off somewhere reading and Janus was busy finishing a potion for Patton the fae, Remus slammed open the door.

“I’m home!” Janus rolled their eyes, used to the demon’s antics. “I brought company!” Remus dragged another person into the cabin. Janus immediately stood up.

“Logan! Hello. Did you come with another potion order?” 

Logan, the elf that Remus had been crushing on, was a very serious and simple person. He tended to stick to simple, practical clothes. A fitted navy blue tunic with pants and a half cape that didn’t get in his way. He wore glasses that matched his simple style. Even his accent, a traditional elven dialect, was crisp and simple. 

“I’m afraid not Janus. You see, I came here upon Remus’ request.” Janus turned and raised an eyebrow at Remus, who was bouncing up and down on his toes. 

“I convinced him to date me!” Remus said, holding onto Logan’s hands. 

Janus turned to Logan. “Blink twice if he threatened you into this.” Logan shook his head.

“There was no such threatening. I can’t believe I’m saying this, but we’ve been spending more time around each other and I do not find Remus unbearable as others do. Quite the opposite actually, I find him quite enjoyable. He has a lot of interesting things to say and knows many things about topics I’ve never looked into.”

“You hear that, Janny? I have a boyfriend! I can’t wait for us to do things together! We can go on adventures together, create cool things, teach Virgil how to-” Remus cut himself off, realizing his mistake too late.

“Virgil?” Logan asked. “Who is Virgil?” 

“Virgil is no one, Remus is just being silly,” Janus lied, hoping that Logan would believe them. 

“I heard my name, is everything okay?” Virgil said, walking in from the garden, carrying an old spell book. He froze in his tracks when he saw Logan. Janus could see the anxiety rise up inside Virgil, knew that Virgil would probably have a panic attack any second now if this situation wasn’t taken care of immediately. But they didn’t know what to do. 

“Are you a human?” Logan asked, stepping forward. Virgil immediately took two steps backward, remaining silent. Logan didn’t seem to realize how scared Virgil was, continuing to walk towards him, backing Virgil into a wall as he examined the boy. “Goodness, you are human. How interesting.” 

Remus was the first one to truly react. “That’s actually one of my little demons in training! Not a human at all!” Remus had always been the worst liar that Janus had ever seen. 

“No, this boy is human, and quite an interesting one at that,” Logan mused, continuing to study Virgil. He noticed the book that Virgil was clutching to his chest.

“Can you read that? Understand it?” He asked. Unsure of what to do, Virgil nodded. His breathing was becoming rapid. 

“Fascinating. Can you brew potions, perform simple spells?” Another nod. Janus moved, slipping in between Logan and Virgil, motioning for Virgil to go outside. The teen obeyed immediately, sitting in the grass, out of sight of Logan. He focused on steadying his breathing. Janus would take care of this. 

“You can’t tell anyone he’s here. You know what some of them would do if they found out,” Janus pleaded.

“Don’t be ridiculous, he has just as much a right to live in this forest, just like every other mythical creature here.” 

Janus raised an eyebrow as the three adults moved to the couch. “What do you mean?” 

“Don’t you think it’s funny that a human boy can perform magic? And did you see what he was reading, those weren’t simple spells that he was studying. I think it’s more than safe to say he has witches’ blood. How ever did you find him?” 

Janus and Remus worked together to tell the story of how they found Virgil and brought him back to the cabin. Logan listened in rapt attention and thought a few minutes after they had finished telling the story.

“Did you ever figure out what drew you to him?” Logan finally asked Janus.

“No. For all I know, it was just chance,” they said. 

“I want to do some research back at my library, but I’m almost 100% sure that boy has witch’s blood in his veins. That would explain everything. Why he was drawn to this forest, why you decided to help him, why he’s so good at magic. I’m sure if you asked him, that would even explain why he decided to leave his home.” 

"So, Virgil can stay?" Remus asked. Logan nodded and Remus immediately moved so that he was sitting next to his boyfriend, as if he had kept space between them in case Logan said that Virgil had to leave. 

Logan left, insisting that he had to start immediately on his research into Virgil’s family history, leaving Janus and Remus alone. The moment that they were sure that Logan was gone, Janus ran into the garden, followed by Remus. 

The two adults found Virgil under a tree, tearing at the grass as if that would calm him down. He looked up when he heard them running towards him. Janus could still see panic in the teenager’s eyes. 

“I’m going to have to leave, aren’t I?” The sentence was like being stabbed through the heart with a sharp sword, Janus felt so much pain over it. Remus practically threw himself on the ground, pulling Virgil into a hug and holding him close. Janus joined the hug, keeping his own sobs at bay.

“You aren’t going to leave,” Remus said. Out of all of them, Remus was definitely the calmest in the moment, which was very strange. But Janus couldn’t focus on it at the moment. “If Janus tries to kick you out, I’ll feed them to my hellhounds and you’ll come with me.” 

“Of course I’m not going to kick you out or make you leave. If you want to stay, then I’d be more than happy to let you. You’re family by now.” Janus reached over and wiped a tear off of Virgil’s cheek. Virgil sniffled, trying to pull himself together. 

“But what about that elf?” Virgil asked between sniffles. “Won’t he try to get rid of me?” 

“Logan? He would never.” Remus looked slightly offended on his boyfriend’s behalf, but only slightly. 

Janus smiled. “He thinks that you’re like me. He thinks that you’re actually a witch.” 

Virgil’s jaw dropped a few inches. “But I’m human!”

“Virgil, do you know anything about your family? You never talk about them.” Janus knew that Virgil’s answer to this question could tell them more than all of Logan’s research put together.

Virgil shook his head solemnly. “I don’t know.” 

“Then I think it’s safe to say that the odds that one of your ancestors was a witch is very possible. Virgil, you’re the best student I’ve ever seen. You pick up concepts and skills quicker than anyone I know.”

“So I’m a witch?” Virgil looked at the spell book lying on the ground next to him with a new found appreciation.

“Quite possibly.” 

“Logan is looking into it right now,” Remus said. “He has a whole library full of books and he thinks one might contain a family tree that you should be a part of, if you aren’t already.” 

“So I can stay?” 

“Yes, of course you can stay.” 

~

“I’d like to see Virgil.” 

Janus looked up from their work, and made eye contact with Logan, who was standing in the front doorway. 

“Well hello to you too Logan. It’s a pleasure to see you in my house.” 

“This is important. I want to speak to Virgil. I think I may have found his family.” 

Janus dropped what they were doing, and immediately walked over to Logan. 

“You think so? Wow, that’s amazing.” 

“So can I see him?” Logan seemed slightly impatient, not unusual to him. Logan liked to know things, and not knowing things made him uncomfortable. Janus could tell that this was one of those moments where he didn’t know something and he expected Virgil to have the answers.

“I’m afraid that Virgil isn’t home right now. Remus took him down to hell to see the new hellhound puppies. I don’t know exactly when they’ll be back, but you’re welcome to wait here until them.” 

Logan nodded and thanked Janus before sitting down on the couch. Janus watched the elf for a minute, noting how his leg bounced in anticipation. For Logan’s sake, they hoped that Remus and Virgil would be back soon. 

~

The sound of two people shouting excitedly was what alerted Logan and Janus that Remus and Virgil had returned. Logan had been waiting on Janus’ couch for nearly an hour, sitting in silence with his leg bouncing. When he heard them, Logan practically leaped off the couch. 

Remus kicked the door open, floating inside. Virgil followed, excitedly explaining something to Remus, his hands waving around his head as he talked. He immediately stopped talking when he saw Logan.

“Lolo!” Remus said, throwing himself at his boyfriend. Logan kissed Remus quickly before turning back to Virgil.

“I’m sorry to spoil your conversation Virgil but do you have a moment? I’d like to talk to you, in private.” Virgil’s glance immediately shot to Janus, looking for an answer as to what was going on. Janus mouthed the word family and Virgil seemed to understand.

“Sure, yeah, would you like to walk in the garden or talk in my room?” Virgil asked Logan. Logan fidgeted with his glasses. 

“The garden is fine. This will only take a minute.” Janus and Remus watched as Logan followed Virgil out the door into the back garden. The moment that they were out of sight, Remus turned on his heels and demanded an explanation from Janus.

“Logan showed up to speak to Virgil about an hour ago,” They explained. “Said it had to do with his family. I can only hope that it's good news.” 

“Jan,” Remus sat down on the couch, his voice soft as if he was afraid to say what he was about to say. “What if Virgil finds his family? What if they’re nearby and he wants to live with them?”

Janus hadn’t even thought about this, but it made sense that Virgil would want to live with his real family, not with Janus and Remus. They sat down next to Remus, resting their head on the demon’s shoulder.

“I guess all we can do is support him. It’s his family, we don’t get to claim that title. He’ll probably still want to spend time with us.”

“And if he doesn’t? What if he prefers his new family, his real family, to us and never wants to speak to us again?” It was rare for Remus to worry about something, which indicated to Janus how much this was bugging Remus.

“Well, then we’ll just have to accept that. There’s nothing we can do.” 

They sat in silence for a minute, letting the thought of losing Virgil settle in their minds. When Virgil and Logan walked in the house, they both jumped up to greet them. Logan stood near the door in silence while Virgil walked over to the two adults.

“So, do you know who your family is?” Remus asked, hovering a few inches over Virgil. The teenager nodded. Remus sank down to the floor, leaning on Janus for support.

“Are you going to stay with them?” Janus asked softly. 

“My family was a line of powerful witches, but Logan says that nobody knows what happened to them. They don’t live in the forest anymore.” Remus stood a little straighter, hope glimmered in his eyes. 

“So that means you’re staying?” He asked. Janus tried not to smile, but he felt just as hopeful as Remus looked.

“I wouldn’t know where to start looking for my family. Besides, you guys are my real family now and I could never leave you.” Virgil wrapped his arms around both Janus and Remus, holding them close in a tight group hug. They hugged him back, both feeling full of joy and gratefulness. Remus looked up and motioned for Logan to join the hug, who agreed slightly reluctantly. The four of them were a family. An odd family, but a family nonetheless. 

~

“Virgil, if you don’t stir that right now, it’s going to explode!” Janus shouted, watching in horror as Virgil stood over the cauldron. Sure enough, the liquid in the pot let out a great popping noise as the room was enveloped in smoke and the two stood coughing. When the smoke cleared, the cauldron was empty, with a burnt smell coming from the bottom. 

“Sorry,” Virgil said, immediately going to clean up. He was laughing slightly at his mistake. Janus couldn’t help but smile, mistakes were rare with Virgil, he was so good at witchcraft. 

“Don’t tell Remus, he’ll be praising you for trying to kill us both and I don’t think I can live with that,” they joked, helping Virgil clean up. 

“Don’t worry. You know what Logan would say if he heard that I made such a rookie mistake? I’d never hear the end of it!” 

“Roman stopped by the other day, while you were out with Logan. He said that you and Remus were causing problems again.” Janus watched as the teen’s face turned a bright pink. Pranking with Remus had become a common pastime for the young boy, but Janus never found the heart to tell him to stop. Often, they found the silly tricks funny and couldn’t help but laugh at how Remus’ brother always reacted. Roman was quite a dramatic angel. If him and Remus got along, they would be quite a force to be reckoned with. 

“It’s not my fault! Remus was upset at something Roman said and he had the perfect revenge plan! I only used one spell and it wasn’t even that powerful!” Virgil defended himself but stopped when he saw that Janus wasn’t angry. 

“Just don’t get caught next time,” they warned Virgil. “I’ll have to tell the same thing to Remus. I swear, the two of you together are like two small children. I don’t know how Logan doesn’t go insane dating that menace.” 

“Did someone say menace?” Remus asked, popping his head through the front door. 

“Yes, we were just talking about you,” Janus said. 

“I knew it! I am the most menacing menace this forest has ever seen you know!” Remus floated into the house, followed by Logan, who was rolling his eyes at his boyfriend’s absurdity. 

“Are you all prepared for the family picnic?” Logan asked. Janus nodded, grabbing the large basket of food that they had prepared from the counter. 

“I’ll carry that!” Virgil said, grabbing the heavy basket before Janus could object. He had to adjust his hold on it a few times before he was comfortable carrying it, leading the way out the back door through the gardens. 

They set up the picnic under a large tree that was older than all of them put together. Logan took a few moments to tell Virgil about the tree’s magical properties, who listened in rapt attention. Janus would have listened, but he was busy stopping Remus from eating all the mini pies.

“You know, I’m glad I didn’t feed you to my hellhounds,” Remus told Virgil. “You’re a good kid.” 

“You could never feed me to them anyways, I’m too powerful and besides, they like me more than they like you.” Remus let out a dramatic gasp, offended. Virgil smirked, continuing to mock Remus. 

“You guys ready for lunch?” Janus asked. Everybody sat down and waited. Janus smiled at their friends gathered around on the blanket. He thought of how close they had grown, how many memories they had made. 

Janus held up a drink, indicating that they wanted to make a toast. The others followed suit. 

“To family, however strange we may be.” The others repeated the words and dug in. Once, Virgil looked up and smiled at Janus. Janus was sure that they would be speaking for everyone under that tree when they said that family was the best thing to ever happen to them. The odd, mixed family, with all of it’s magic, was probably the greatest thing in the world.

[shuturxface]

Quarantine has, completely out of no where, compelled me to re-read The Life and Times. I finished three days ago and yes I’m still crying. BUT! to get my emotions out I wrote something of a “review”. It’s really just my thoughts about everything. No one asked but I’m posting it anyway. 

Please enjoy, it’s below. Be warned, there are *spoilers*: 

Thoughts and Musings:

I don’t particularly know why I’ve been so affected by The Life and Times this go around. I’ve always loved it, but I don’t think I’ve ever cried when Alice Griffiths (now Longbottom) tells Lily that she’s spontaneously marrying Frank Longbottom. And I also don’t think that I’ve ever felt more than fondness towards Marlene Price and Adam Mckinnon. And, I’ve always disliked Carlotta Meloni (especially during the summer and 7thyear), but I never actually hated her character. All until now. The first time I read The Life and Times, I really, really enjoyed it and appreciated the characters and the plot and the realism– like, come on, of course they’re not going to make out in the middle of an escape! However, I was, admittedly, disappointed with the lack of James/Lily action. Not that it was scarce, there certainly was a lot! But this time around, I finally realized why Jewels wrote it in that way. Lily disliked James – possibly resented him – for five years, and more strongly much more recently (I expect her unsavory opinions of him were most prominent during 5thyear, what with his excessive exclamations of “go on a date with me, Evans”). Of course, it’s going to take more than a few weeks to erase that! And it’s not like it could take less time, because, realistically, why would Lily want to spend that much more time with James if she wasn’t fond of him, and if they kept fighting. Honestly, their development as friends is much more interesting, and it shows an in-depth thought processes of fleshing out the characters. I am thoroughly moved by the fact that it doesn’t happen over-night or within a few days.

I’ve also read complaints about how James Potter is acting disinterested in Lily. To them I say: did you even read the goddamnstory?! Did you pass over the parts where he watches her when she’s not looking, and the parts where he is upset with himself for how strongly he feels about her?! If James Potter is anything, he is not an idiot (however idiotic he may act sometimes). From what the (actual HP) books show, James was interested in Lily and kept asking her out in their 5thyear. If I recall correctly, it was implied that he may have done so years prior. It is also stated, by Sirius Black, that they got together in 7thyear. Once again, that transformation from enemies to lovers is not going to happen overnight, and is definitely not going to happen if James Potter kept overtly obsessing over her in 6thyear. Also (!) there is a perfectly reasonable explanation Jewels gives us for why he acted this way: he wanted to get over her. Not only does this prove that he liked her deeply, not just superficially, but also that he got the message. He would have been truly, very thick had he not.

But back to the matter at hand. For some reason, this time around (I don’t remember, possibly third), I’ve been thoroughly engrossed and cried at different intervals of the story more so than before. I sobbed at the end of chapter 30, “The Worst Day Ever” in which it followed each character (Carlotta, Marlene, Donna, Mary, and Lily) on September 1st. I cried terribly during the last two chapters with the attack on the M.F.P. conference – the tension and the unknowing, and worst of all, the death of Sam Dearborn. Quickly, a word about Sam. Somehow, through so few chapters, Jewels created such a lovable character (limited in “screen time”) that his death (and Lily and James’ reaction to it) caused me to cry on multiple occasions. Jewels was able to capture the anguish of her characters so well, that for a moment I forgot it was a story at all and felt it myself. I cried when Sirius Black told Lily Evans that she “fit” with the Marauders, after she asked him why he was so sure she and James belonged together. I have absolutely no idea how she managed to utterly take me apart in the span of 3 days and 36 chapters, but no fanfiction has been able to do that.

I am fully in awe of what Jewels has created – The Life and Times is a work of art, capturing the 1970s in the Wizarding World perfectly. Would I like to see how each James and Lily, how Adam and Marlene, Mary and Reginald get together? No, I would love it. Am I still curious of how on earth all those 87 wizards and witches were murdered at the Magic For Peace convention, leaving no survivors? No, I’m haunted by it. And while there are parts that are frustrating to read (some sexist and misogynistic parts, especially from a few Ravenclaws are particularly uncomfortable), I also think she delivers an accurate representation of the 70s, which were much less politically correct that the world is today. She is not even encouraging this behavior because it’s all made by unlikeable “villainous” characters – not particularly evil, but definitely malicious.

Because Jewels created this story so magnificently, only she knew where it was headed and how it would play out. She wrote it so uniquely, using quick dialogue that made me feel that I was actually there. Phrasing her syntax in such a way that her descriptions were musical and poetic and completely relatable. Her chapter structures kept me on my toes, each one with its own unique flavor, yet all of them unified, flowing from one to the other perfectly.

Not only that, she created characters with strong, redeeming qualities as well as true, trying weaknesses. Lily Evans: she created Lily to be a kind individual that always sought to see the good in others, as J.K. Rowling told us she was. But she also made Lily imaginative and contemplative and romantic and strong, and, yes, sorrowful, fearful, angry, and (most importantly, if you ask me) not willing to discuss her real feelings with anyone, thus slightly hypocritical. James Potter: Jewels created James to be loyal, clever, more-than-slightly arrogant, humorous, brave, and even compassionate. But she also made him brooding, impulsive, hot headed, and many times, a prick. I could go on, but the main point is this: Jewels created complex characters. She didn’t make a wondrous, unfailingly kind Lily (if she were, why did she and James butt heads so viciously?), or a comical, lovesick James, a cheeky, brazen Sirius, a quiet, sentimental Remus, a quivering Pettigrew, or a moody, jealous Snape (yes, even he had more to him than this – drive and hunger to prove himself). Jewels created characters with depth! Characters that made mistakes and don’t just immediately learn from them. Hell, she made teenage characters in a fanfiction that didn’t ultimately think with their primary sex organ – characters that were able to see that there were more important things happening besides who’s shagging who. Of course, there were characters that were interested in this, but they’re not the type of people that would go to a protest at the Ministry of Magic (and, obviously, this just strengthens the certainty that James and Lily truly belong together). Essentially, Jewels created characters that are sometimes hard to like. She showed us real emotions and feelings and struggles like a proper novel. She went further than an exploration of two people’s love life and gave contextual reasons to their coming together, and why their relationship was so important in the greater scheme of Harry Potter. She created multiple storylines, intricately woven together, incorporating briefly mentioned characters in the Harry Potter series and giving them backstory and personalities. Jewels created a world within J.K. Rowling’s universe with complex political turmoil.

I fully and strongly admire the work and dedication that Jewels put into The Life and Times. I feel that it’s wishful thinking that she might return to this story after all these years (has it really been seven already?!), but I can’t help but wish all the same. I do understand because life does have a habit of getting in the way and people move on. I’m truly grateful for Jewels and what she gave to the world. No other fanfiction will ever evoke the feelings that The Life and Times does. No matter the emotional strife this story gives me, I will always be grateful, and it will always be my favorite. Thank you, Jewels.

[romansleftshoulderpad]

Straight for the Castle

Words: 2,950

Ship: Romantic Dukeceit

Warnings: Regicide mentioned more than once, dead parents, mentions of killing, it’s implied one of the sides is dead but if this thing gets a part two than I’m promising you he isn’t, sympathetic Deceit + Remus, blood mention, scars mention, Hell mention, the chorus is only used in halves the first two times because I have learned why I do not stray from my usual format for song fics

Tags: @fandermom @patchworkofstars @poisonedapples @hogwarts-my-love @opaque-puppet @omni-hamiltrash @darling-elm @jynxlovesluck @localtransgrape @no-one-remembers-achmed 

---

Sick of all these people talking, sick of all this noise

The war had been a brutal one. The royal family had been brutally attacked and beaten as soldiers from a rival burned down the city. Their armies fought back but no one could have prepared for this sudden of an invasion- especially not one this size. Not on Christmas day.

“Over here,” Virgil, the prince’s personal guard yelled as he helped the twin boys from their room. They were just two months shy of their fourteenth birthday. They were terrified. “I know a secret passageway,” Virgil said. “Be brave little princes for me, won’t you?”

Roman might’ve cried, though Remus can hardly remember anything but the flames throughout the city and the sudden screams from down the hall where he would later spot the king and queen laying side by side in a pool of the very blood that ran through him and his brother.

They snuck through a tunnel in the walls, breathing in the dank and musty air and choking on cobwebs. Virgil wore a scarf that covered his nose and mouth. He was immune to the choking and coughing that plagued both princes.

Remus doesn’t think about the tunnel. He doesn’t think about his parents or his little sister that was taken. He doesn’t wonder if she’s still alive. He doesn’t think about the smoke in the air or the blood and ash that covered the city streets as they escaped.

But he does remember Virgil yelling “RUN” and the two boys splitting up. He turned his head and saw soldiers grabbing Virgil. He struggled as they threw him into a prison cart. He saw Roman running into the burning city as he ran into the woods.

He saw Roman running into the city. He saw Roman running. He saw Roman.

After that night, Remus never saw his brother again.

Both princes kept running.

Remus doesn’t know what happened to Roman. Some days he wonders if knowing is worth being hurt all over again. Remus kept running. He kept running. He kept running.

Remus kept running.

Tired of all these cameras flashing, sick of being poised.

Remus lived in the woods for years. He kept living. He kept running. He never looked back over his shoulder ever again, for he knew that all that laid back there was blood, ash, and smoke.

He found himself far beyond the edge of the capital after five years. He was outside of the kingdom after ten. Then again after fifteen. The kingdom that had taken over just kept growing. The more Remus ran the more his past stalked him like a hunter.

Remus remembered the flames. He refused to be prey ever again.

Now my neck is open wide, begging for a fist around it

It was a year later when he met Ethan, a man shrouded in mystery who had been designated too hazardous and chancy to be part of any real civilization. When he found a feral man lost in the woods, he only had a few questions, none of which involved his past.

The two moved in together, in a small cabin Ethan had either built or stolen. His story changed every time.

But perhaps that’s what initially drew Remus to Ethan was that they were both outsiders. They had no family so they found a family in each other.

But what really convinced Remus to stick around was how Ethan was unhesitatingly down with regicide.

Already choking on my pride, so there’s no use crying about it

“Ethan,” Remus said, through a sip of coffee. His hands were shaking against the porcelain and he was afraid it might break. “There’s something I need to tell you. A-About my past. About why I’m here.”

“Remus, I thought we agreed that’s not necc-”

“No, I- I want to tell you. I need to tell you.” He put his cup down and met Ethan’s eyes. “Because I need you to help me get revenge.”

I’m heading straight for the castle

“Prince?” Ethan asked. “No, they- they killed the entire royal family.”

“Not me. Not Roman.”

“How did you-?” “I ran. I snuck out of the castle and I ran. For so long I ran un- until I met you.” Remus could feel his heart beating against his throat. “Because of you, I stopped having to run. And with you, I’ll never have to run ever again.”

“You’re asking quite a lot from me, Remus.”

“I know. And I wouldn’t do this if I didn’t think we had a fighting chance.”

Ethan took a deep breath. He slid out from his chair and kneeled on the floor in front of Remus. He looked up with a dastardly grin. “Anything for you, your royal highness.”

They’re gonna make me their queen

“Alright, if we’re going to do this, we need to make sure it can work.” He dumped a handful of maps and scrolls onto the table. “I know that castle like the back of my hand.”

“And?” Ethan asked.

“And I know the tunnels too.”

“Perfect.”

And there’s an old man sitting on the throne that’s saying that I probably shouldn’t be so mean.

“We leave at midnight. In a week’s time, we take back the throne.”

Oh, all of these minutes passing, sick of feeling used.

Ethan could still remember the day he got kicked out.

And the day he finally ran away.

If you wanna break these walls down, you’re gonna get bruised.

He hid the scars on his face. He hid his magic, vowing never to use it again. After how his powers- how he- had been exploited, how could he? His parents had disowned him for being too powerful. He ran away from the puppeteer for being too weak.

He wouldn’t be a puppet.

He wouldn’t be used for a show or for pulling rabbits out of a hat.

He swore off human contact. He found a dead man’s retirement home and he buried the body. He taught himself to fish and caught all his meals from that point on. Eventually, he’d also learn how to hunt deeper in the woods.

But then he met Remus. And his promise of spending forever alone seeped through his grip like grains of sand.

It wasn’t instantaneous, of course, Ethan had to know he was trustworthy. Remus was practically feral, one with nature in far too many ways. But he had spent his whole life running. That was something Ethan could respect. That was something Ethan could understand.

Now my neck is open wide, begging for a fist around it. Already choking on my pride, so there’s no use crying about it.

The two of them had found- well, stolen- a wagon from the nearby city. However, it had no horse to pull it, and a horse is a much harder thing to steal. Ethan took a deep breath as he broke one more vow, all in Remus’s name.  

“Since you’ve told me something about your past, your highness, I think it’s only fair I do the same.”

“Ethan, you don’t have to-”

He pressed his hands against the wood. He concentrated, feeling the energy flow through his skin. He hadn’t used magic in so long the feeling was almost foreign. His skin was buzzing and tingling. The cart began to move forward and Ethan promptly fell back, his head hitting the seat.

“Ethan!” Remus yelled, reaching out for him.

Ethan weakly raised his hand, waving it dismissively. “I’ll be fine.” His eyes slipped closed. “I’m just... a little tired.” As he drifted off to sleep, the magic continued pushing them forward. Remus pulled Ethan close, letting the magician’s head fall on his shoulder as he wrapped his arms around him like a blanket. He would stay awake, watchful and protecting, in case anyone tried to come in between them. He would protect Ethan with his life before taking the unlawful king’s.

I’m headed straight for the castle. They’ve got the kingdom locked up.

They found themselves taking shifts, one sleeping while the other watched for any potential threats. They had both said it was for protection but to say there was nothing more would be to go back on their new promise to be open with each other.

Remus was sound asleep, tucked under Ethan’s arm when they approached the edge of the kingdom. Ethan ran his fingers through Remus’s hair, shaking him lightly. “Look,” he whispered, “revenge is in your grasp, your highness.”

“Our grasp,” Remus corrected, slowly opening his eyes. “We’re in this together, remember?”

Ethan blushed and tried to keep a straight face. “Of course, your highness. Together.”

“You don’t have to call me ‘your highness’ you know. I haven’t been a prince in sixteen years.”

“On the contrary, your highness, I don’t think I can stop.”

Remus laughed and pressed a kiss to Ethan’s face, his lips brushing against the scar that connected the corner of his mouth to his cheekbone. “You old sap.”

Ethan’s blush grew and he turned to face Remus, his eyes wide with shock. Their noses brushed and he felt he might faint. His eyes fell towards Remus’s mouth and his heart trembled with fear and excitement. In a life of solitude and confinement, was this what it felt like to fall in love?

“We’re one step closer to victory.”

“One step closer to your reign.” Ethan swallowed his heart. “Your highness.”

And there’s an old man sitting on a throne that’s saying I should probably keep my pretty mouth shut

Flags hung in the city. Thousands of flags celebrating the king that had destroyed Remus’s life. Destroyed his family and burnt citizens into the soil that was merely swept off of the ground.

He kept his eyes on the prize.

Straight for the castle

He jumped off the wagon as Ethan withdrew his magic from it. “Hey,” Ethan whispered, touching his shoulder lightly. His touch was full of magic, it felt like static electricity against his skin. “Are you okay?”

There’s no use crying about it

“I’m fine,” Remus lied.

There’s no use crying about it

The screams and fire cackling echoed through his mind. The heat resurfaced to his face and the tears of fallen children threatened to fall from his eyes.

There’s no use crying about it

“Let’s go, Ethan.”

There’s no use crying about it 

They marched onwards

I’m heading straight for the castle

It was surprisingly easy to get to the back of the castle’s property, just west of the gardens. Remus tried to remember, he shut his eyes tight and, for the first time in years, let himself think about his brother and his parents. He thought about Virgil and his little sister. He pressed his fingertips against the brick and tugged at one of them, opening a small hole in the wall.

“Come on,” he whispered.

“You’re crying.”

“We’re getting revenge.”

They trekked forward. Ethan quietly looped their fingertips, holding on tight to Remus’s hand. They stopped and he heard Remus take a sharp breath. It was so dark they could hardly see a thing. “It’s okay to be upset. I can’t pretend I know what it was like that night, but I can be here for you now. And- And if this is the last time we see each other again, I have to say I-”

“Don’t.”

Ethan blinked, taken aback. “What?”

“Don’t say it, don’t think it,” Remus said. “If I- If I think of you like that- Ethan, I can’t lose you.”

“You won’t. I promise you won’t.”

They wanna make me their queen

They snuck into the old princes’ bedroom through an entrance behind the kingdom’s flag. It had been only touched by time. Remus reached out for an old teddy bear that had been laying on the ground. His button eyes were nearly fallen off and his cardboard crown had been destroyed. “This was Roman’s,” he explained. “He could never fall asleep without him.”

“I’m sure you’re brother is still out there. Maybe once you reclaim the throne, he’ll come back.”

Remus looked up at him, his cheeks flush red with the ghosts of tears still staining his skin. He had been crying in the tunnel. “I hope he doesn’t, deep down. I hope he’s out there, not thinking about this horrible night. He saw much more of it than I did.”

“Let’s go make sure no one ever sees a night like that ever again.”

And there’s an old man sitting on the throne that’s saying that I probably shouldn’t be so mean. I’m heading straight for the castle.

Remus unsheathed his dagger and the two snuck out of the bedroom. They had made it maybe ten feet out before stumbling upon nearly thirty armed guards. “HALT!” they yelled charging towards them.

“Get behind me!” Ethan yelled, sending a powerful blast of magic in front of him. Every guard shot back, most of them injured and a few dead. Ethan stole their weapons and marched onwards.

“You didn’t tell me you could do that,” Remus said.

Ethan turned around, his eyes were glowing white and a new scar sat across the bridge of his nose. “There’s a lot of things I haven’t told you.”

“Can I tell you that I am very turned on right now?”

Ethan laughed and turned back to the mission. “Maybe later.”

They’ve got the kingdom locked up And there’s an old man sitting on the throne that’s saying I should probably keep my pretty mouth shut.

As they approached the throne room, Remus returned his dagger to its sheath, instructing Ethan to hide his weapons in whatever way he could. The guards inside pointed their spears and swords at them, but they didn’t seem to know about the dead guards only a few rooms away.

“We wish no harm,” Remus lied. “Only a council with His Majesty.”

The king looked upon them. His crown hid a balding head and his beard hid the wrinkled face of a murderer. Remus’s blood boiled, calming only when he felt Ethan’s hand on his back. He had to remember why they were here. He bowed. “Your Majesty, I am Prince Remus. You killed my entire family and half of our capital when you took this kingdom.”

Ethan set off another blast of magic to his sides, knocking out several guards but nowhere near enough. A scar went through his right eye. He handed a sword to Remus and they fought off the guards in a blur of metal and blood. Somehow (probably through Ethan’s magic) both of them were able to get through unscathed. Ethan sent one last bear of magic, just enough to hold the king down to his throne, and collapsed on the ground.

Remus walked up to the struggling king, slowly and deliberately. He took his dagger and held it to the light. “A beautiful thing, isn’t it? I got it from my father. You remember him, right? He was sitting on this very throne when you took the blood from his veins and the life from his eyes.” He leaned over the king, their faces merely inches apart as he whispered, “which is exactly what I’m going to do to you.”

“You’ll go to Hell for this!” The king yelled.

Remus drove his dagger through the king’s chest, stepping away from the blood to avoid staining his clothes. “Then I’ll see you there, where I shall destroy you again and again and again until you know even a smidgen of the agony I have been faced with for sixteen years.” He took the crown off of the king’s head as he let out his last breath. Placing the crown upon his head, Remus proclaimed, “Long live the king.”

Straight for the castle. They’re gonna make me their queen. And there’s an old man sitting on the throne that’s saying that I probably shouldn’t be so mean.

Remus took the throne with Ethan by his side. They had a wedding shortly thereafter which Remus had claimed was to officially split their power, but their affection behind closed doors said otherwise.

Ethan hadn’t used any powerful magic since they took the throne, as it had caused him to go blind in one eye and he feared losing anything else. But Remus would kiss his scars and tell him how much he adored his “brave little magician.”

It was the night after Ethan’s crowing when he pressed his head against Remus’s and smoothed out his husband’s coat. “Now will you kiss me properly?”

“As you wish, your highness.”

“You know, you really don’t need to call me that.”

Remus hummed and wrapped his arms around Ethan’s neck. “On the contrary, your highness, I don’t think I can stop.” He leaned in and pressed their lips together. He could feel Ethan’s heart racing against his own. It was so soft and simple and Remus smiled into it. He could show Ethan magic, those powerful sparks that brought them here now against his lips. He could show him over a decade fighting against the wilderness. He could break him apart.

But Remus stayed soft and gentle. He pressed his hand against Ethan’s heart time and time again. After all they had fought for, being gentle was what they needed. Together.

I'm headed straight for the castle They've got the kingdom locked up And there's an old man sitting on the throne that’s saying I should probably keep my pretty mouth shut

They say upon their thrones, equal in size and power, and interlocked their fingers as they watched the sunrise over the kingdom they would rebuild and restore.

Straight for the castle

[obviouslyelementary]

The Sweetest Dream

Based on @sidespart fanart, they are amazing, omg. 

This can be read as platonic or romantic, I didn’t want to make it explicit because I didn’t know what the fanart was supposed to be so it’s vague okay don’t @ me

Also very short - 600 words

---------------------------------

Just like the others, Roman's duty inside Thomas wasn't just to be creative, fancible and extremely handsome. He had other things to do too, other functions, and one of those was to be the bringer of dreams, both real and figurative. He gave Thomas goals to achieve, dreams to fulfil, and enjoyment over his victories, but he also handed over actual dreams, allowing Thomas to get a sense of happiness and fulfilment inside his own imagination while he slept.

So yes, he was like Thomas' Sand Man, he brought him the nicest of dreams, and as such, he could do the same to the other sides too. He could put them all to sleep immediately, and make up the most incredible dreams as they wished. He calmed Virgil down when he struggled, giving him dreams of emo bands shows and Thomas' friends; he gave Patton some relief whenever he was overwhelmed, giving him dreams of children he could take care of and cookies the size of beds; he reluctantly gave Janus some time to adjust, allowing him to dream about being an actual snake in a calm amazon forest and relaxing underneath a tent under the bright night sky; and he even opened some exceptions to Remus, the bringer of nightmares, some time for his dreams, allowing him to dream about killing evil monsters and protecting the ones he loved.

They were regulars, Roman could say. Patton came the most often, followed by Virgil and then the other two. But there was a side in particular that rarely requested his magical skills, and that usually prefer the hard cold silent sleep rather than a warm, happy dream.

And Roman felt frustrated, sometimes, because he knew he could give Logan whatever he desired, for a short period of time, and yet he was still denied access to Logan's incredible mind, that were probably filled with wonder and mathematical equations.

He hadn't made dreams up for Logan in years, and he didn't expect to ever do them again. But that afternoon, during a storm, after Thomas finished off a large project he was working on, Roman heard knocks in his door, and expected Patton or Janus to come in, requesting some type of comfort after such a long day of work.

"Come in" he said, turning his chair away from his desk, only to see Logan appearing behind his door, looking around until their eyes met. "Logan! What can I do for you?"

Logan came usually to talk, discuss subjects and make up new projects.

But today he looked tired.

"Patton and Virgil recommended I came to you this afternoon" he said, softly, getting inside, closing the door and fixing his tie. "They said I look... too stressed out and tired. That I'm working too much."

"But you only come over when you wish to work" Roman said, confused, but he could see the light blush in Logan's cheeks as he sighed and nervously fixed his tie again.

"I want to dream" he said, quickly, before he shook his head and softened his voice. "Give me a dream, please?"

Roman's eyes widened and sparkled with magic, turning almost red around the brown irises. He stood up, offering his bed, and Logan walked over, laying down. Roman sat just behind his head, gently placing it over his lap, removing Logan's glasses and loosening his tie, before brushing his hair back and allowing his magic to flow through his fingers, watching closely as Logan's eyes closed like he had received a nice sleeping pill.

"For you? The sweetest dream I've got" he whispered, leaning down, and with a spark of magic, he kissed Logan's forehead, allowing him to have the deepest, sweetest, most incredible dreams he ever wished.

And as he took Logan in his journey, entering his mind, guiding him to his dreams, he saw a beautiful field of flowers underneath a shiny night sky, filled with stars. And Logan sat on the grass, underneath it all, not alone, but with Roman by his side.

In his sleeping face, he smiled, and all his stress went away.

And Roman allowed himself also to relax, enjoying the view.

[alkali-is-sleeping]

The Dog Star 2

[cw: some shouting, anger, could be triggering for some]

<previous chapter>

If my little brother — a Death Eater who made Walburga, our mother very proud — had not gotten himself killed at the hands of the Dark Lord, I most likely would not have inherited my family’s home. Twelve Grimmauld Place loomed below us. The House of Black had never been welcoming, but I needed to make this Hari's home; its needed to welcome him.

I revved again as we made our descent, careful to make sure that Hari was still safe as we landed.

But there was a shadowy figure at the door. I wrapped Hari with my jacket, separating his sleepy head from what may lay ahead, panicking at the thought that he may be taken from me, or worse...

I neared cautiously, I daren’t say fearfully, my life had overflown with it for too long and I needed my courage more than ever now. The closer I got, the more I became certain that this was someone I knew, but the pressing fog in my head made it impossible for me to say who until —

Fearful amber eyes turned to me, lowered on the slowish breathing lump in my jacket and glistened under the light of the street lamps and the stars — I was named after the brightest one — and the no longer full moon.

Remus teared up more and more the closer I drew. He reached his hand out, once I was near enough, as if to touch Hari, but retracted it just as quickly, thinking better if it.

I did not want to let go of the baby. He was a lifeline then, keeping my head over water, stopping me from drowning in the grief and the mess and the truth and —

Remus had always been the best at gauging my emotion, my confusion radiating to him perhaps, permeating his ever calm demeanor, telling him that my hands and this baby were, at least for now, surgically attached. He tapped his wand to the door causing it to clunk painfully through the soundless night, and pushed it for us all to get in.

He lit the fire in the drawing room, all the candles and lamps and eventually took to standing in a far corner of the room staring at sleeping Hari, occasionally wiping his eyes with his tatty jumper sleeve.

“W-why didn’t you tell me you weren’t the Secret Keeper?” I started at the sound; it was the first voice I’d heard all night aside from Hari’s cooing and babbling.

I lifted my eyes to Remus’s; red and bloodshot, just like mine probably.

“Forgive me... we didn’t think we could trust you... Voldemort had so much he could have offered you in exchange for...” I gulped. The mistake I had made, it cost my best friend and his wife their lives and I could hardly bring my self to telling Remus.

“I went to Peter’s hiding place,” I continued, “I was supposed to check if he was still ok, but he was gone. No struggle, nothing to suggest he left against his will even... it was my idea to make him Secret Keeper...” I whispered the last bit, tears rolling down my own cheeks, landing on Hari’s little blanket.

Remus hurried next to me, wrapping his arms around me and the baby, his tears mingling with mine.

“No one blames you,Sirius. Peter, well he...”

“Talentless rat,” my voice filled with anger suddenly, burning and smoking just like the Potters’ cottage... “Must have been his proudest moment, selling out his friends and their baby son...” I sobbed drily. “Lily was pregnant again... she and James told me last week, while you were recovering from the moon. They were going to tell you, once you were better and... and...” I trailed off. I didn’t want to stop talking, not when there we’re still so many truths wanting to get out, squirming and rioting in my stomach. I wanted to let them all out, to talk and talk until this was all a distant memory. But Remus’s eyes. His eyes were wide and they had stopped leaking. They were staring at me and for a second — perhaps it was my own paranoid mind, perhaps I imagined the contempt — he did blame me.

I think he was going to say something else before the fire had glowered iridescent green. We both took out our wands and and stood abruptly, Remus in front of me, me covering Hari. Ready for the worst.

A purple wizard’s hat, followed by a great mass of flowing silver-white hair which hid a benevolent old face and then the rest of the purple clad body. Dumbledore.

"I thought I might find you all here." His voice, a seemingly perpetual tone of casual amusement, irked me. My best friends were dead and he had the nerve to stand in my house and tell me, matter-of-factly, he knew he'd find me here? "I'd asked Hagrid earlier tonight to bring young Hari to me," he said, sitting, uninvited, on the nearest armchair. I was shooting daggers at him, but he seemed not to care, looking only between Remus and the baby I held. "But by the time he got there, the baby was gone, taken, the locals told him, by a man in a leather jacket and a flying motorbike... I knew, instantly of course, that his godfather must have taken him to safety."

I shifted my feet uncomfortably and redistributed Hari's weight in my arms. Why was Dumbledore here? What did he want?

I looked at Remus, who was in turn looking at Dumbledore, who was finally looking at me.

"I'm not sorry," i said, chin lifted in the airin defiance, daring him to make me apologise for having gone against his will.

"No one is asking you to be bu--"

"And I am not giving him to you."

My interuption was punished by silence, broken only by a dry cough from Remus. Dumbledore's eyes, bright moonstone, penetrating to the depths of my soul...

"Sirius, from what I gather, as Hari's guardian, you wannt what is best for him. However, you do not seem to have the full measure of things," Dumbledor was now making a dome with his hands, leaning forward on his seat. "I have good reason to believe thathis mother's sacrifice, Lily'sbloodshed for her son, has formed an unpenetrable protection on Hari. This is little understood magic, magic which is the sole reason Hari got away from Voldemort's attack with only a scar."

It was his turn to shoot me daggers; he most likely didnt mean it, but his gaze made me want to run and run. I didn't want to hear about what really happened, I'd seen enough, endured enought, I did not want anymore.

But he did not care, he kept talking, telling me everything, feeding me more and more dark, worm like truths.

"This is why i believe Hari needs to live with his aunt and uncle, blood relations of Lily's." I stared.

"WHAT?!" I bellowed, unable to control the sudden influx of anger bubbling over the surface. Hari woke at the sound, fussing and sqirming. remus made to take him from my grip, but I pushed him away, making him nearly-stumble back,eyes wide.

I rocked the baby slowly, allowing him to ease back to sleep.

Instead, I took to a menacing whisper; "You mean to send him to live with Muggles? People who dont even know him? Did you know Lily never wanted him to meet Petunia and..." I struggled for a name, "Whats-his-face? You want to send him to a place where, perhaps for most of his life, he won't know who he is or where he came from? A-and can't ypu imagine what that'd do to him? That no one will have bothered to tell him about his parents?" I panted as if I had shouted; I said all of that in one angry breath.

"I suppose I'm an easier book to read than I imagined." He was wiping his glasses with the hem of his amethyst robes and, my, did I want to throw stones at him just then, to watch him and his stupid, calm face, shatter into a million pieces, leaving only his delicate, half-moon glasses.

"I'm his godfather. I was the one James and Lily appointed as his guardian if they..." I couldn't say it. Maybe tomorrow could wake up, take some Fire Whiskey down to drink with James as we laugh loudly, like we did in schoool, before the war, laugh about the pathetic dream I'm having...

"Isn't... isn't there some magic in that?" I pleaded, finally defeated perhaps. Dumbledore paced the room twice round, Remus' eyes on him the whole time while i closed mine and imagined James grin, full of laughter and love and... life.

"Perhaps... But more than anything, I think I am to trust the Potters' judgement and their own trust in you, for now. I will decide if this is really a good choice after I have gathered enough information. Until then, you are not to leave this house under any circumstances. Not until I have good reason to believe he will be magically protected from teh Death Eaters out to avenge their fallen Master. And, I am also to understand, given that you are both here, that Peter Pettigrew was the spy the Order had so many whispers about, correct? You are not to search for him either, as I am sure you might be tempted to."

Remus and I just nodded deftly. I could not have cared less about this sentence at Grimmauld Place, though the fleeting urge to go after Peter, to throttle him and rip him limb from limb, did possess me for seconds. But Hari was just so much more important to me, and every second with him was precious, like little glittering pearls gathering in my hands.

"That concludes my bussiness here, and my welcome has been long over stayed, so I shall leave you to it." He Dissaparated.

The next moments all blurred into one,and i cannot say how, by sunrise; the pale greenish orange promisisng a cold, summer's morning, we found ourselves laying in the guest bed, Hari between us, still fast asleep. The both of us staring into space, our pillows damp and salty.

Despite the growing sunlight, Sleep's teder fingers caught up to me...

[A/N: gods this one was long, im sorry it took so long to post, ill try to be faster with chapter 3 (which mind you is longer still than this). i hope dumbledore moral ambiguity shows, dont worry if it doesnt, it really will further on. hope you enjoy and thanx for reading!!]

[iliveiloveiwrite]

Stormy weather

A/N: THE LONGEST FIC I HAVE EVER WRITTEN. As I was writing it, I started to hate the reader lmao so I'm hoping I have redeemed them. I am hoping it flows as you read, that you can see the change in time without having to add ‘time skip’. I hope you enjoy! If you would like to be added to a taglist, let me know, I’ll happily create one! Please like and/or reblog.

Title: Emmy Raver-Lampman - Stormy Weather (originally sung by Etta James)

Pairing: Young!Sirius Black x Reader

Summary: You didn’t realise that a change in seating plan could lead to this.

Requested: Nope

Warnings: some angst, some fluff, some swearing 

Word count: 4.1k

You felt silly – no, you felt stupid.

Two years… two years you had managed to keep your love for Sirius Black quiet. He barely even noticed you on a good day; you hadn’t known where these feelings had come from, yet they were very much present. It had all started when the class had been assigned a seating plan; the teacher had moved you and Black together so there was no choice on his end – he had to talk to you if there was pair work set, and there nearly always was.

There was no reason for you to socialise. You were in the same house, but he had the Marauders, and you had yours. Sirius Black was known amongst the girls of Hogwarts for being ridiculously attractive but also as a notorious flirt – it was your luck that you had a crush on the one boy who would never wholly be yours. There was the occasional overlap when it came to parties in the common room which you rarely attended but for the most part, a word had never been spoke between the two of you until this class.

At the end of the lesson, you were packing away your things, very much glad that you had a free period next so you could try and get ahead on the homework that was beginning to pile up. It looked as if you free periods and your evenings would be spent in the library trying to keep on top of the workload that accompanied an exam year.

A quiet voice next you pulls you out of the routine of packing away, “(Y/N)?”

You turn to Sirius, “Yes?”

He smiles politely at you, “Would you be able to help me with what we’ve covered? I’m struggling slightly in this subject.”

You raise your eyebrows at him in surprise. He may be a prankster, and doesn’t necessarily take everything seriously, but nobody could deny that Sirius Black wasn’t smart. All of the Marauders were.

“Really? You want me to help you?”

He chuckles, “Yes. I’m not completely understanding the context for wizard involvement within the Great Muggle War.”

You nod, “Sure, I’ll help you. When are you next free? We could meet at the library?”

“I’m free now, actually. If you have time, that is?”

“So am I. Let’s head to the library now, I know some good books that can help us.”

Sirius starts to pack his things away while you wait for him. You sigh inwardly, the pile of homework is going to get bigger, but you knew that you wouldn’t be able to deny Sirius. He’s too handsome, and your feelings definitely get in the way.

“Are you ready?” Sirius asks.

“I am. Let’s go read about Muggle wars!” You cheer.

Sirius laughs loudly. You walk together to the library, talking aimlessly to each other. By the time you arrive at the Library, Sirius has you breathless from laughter as he recalls one of the many adventures of the Marauders. From the minute you enter the Library, you know that there is an extremely high chance of you being shushed by Madam Pince.

Steering Sirius towards the right section, you start to whisper about the causes of the First Muggle War. “It had been brewing for a while, there were tensions between the countries surrounding growing militaries and navies, growing empires and such.”

“How does that relate to the wizarding world?”

“The minute war broke out, the Minster for Magic had to be alerted. Archer Evermonde passed a piece of legislation that forbade wizards from fighting in the war. It was a key moment in wizarding history. However, he Minister had to understand that regardless of what he decided, wizards would volunteer, look at Theseus Scamander.”

Sirius opens his mouth to ask another question, but he is interrupted by the rest of the Marauders.

“Padfoot! We wondered where you had gotten to!” James shouts, earning a hush from Madam Pince.

“You’ve found me.”

“Padfoot?” You ask, raising an eyebrow in question.

“My nickname.” Sirius explains.

The rest of the Marauders had joined you at table you shared with Sirius, their eyes looking over the reading material sprawled across it.

“We didn’t know you were struggling with this, Sirius. We could have helped you; you didn’t need to bother poor (Y/N) here.”

“It’s not a bother!” You almost shout, a little too quickly, all attention is now on you and you can feel the tell-tale blush make its way to your cheeks, “I mean,” you start, trying again, “it isn’t a bother at all. I love this topic, wizard involvement within both Muggle world wars interests me, I could talk about it all day. Sirius wasn’t being a bother at all asking me for help.”

Both James and Remus lift an eyebrow each at your explanation. They can completely sense your feelings for Sirius, and you want to slide under the table right about now, your heart going ten to the dozen.

Sirius chuckles, “You see, I’m not being a bother at all. You two are though, bugger off.”

Remus laughs at him, “Okay, okay. James, come on, let’s leave them too it.”

Remus pats James on the shoulder, they both start to depart with a goodbye to both Sirius and you.

Your heart rate has started to settle down, but then Sirius smiles at you and it kicks back into action again.

“Where were we?” He asks.

Checking your watch, you utter, “I’m sorry, I’ve got to go. I’ve got potions with Slughorn and I really don’t want to be late.”

Sirius nods, understanding. “Of course, can we meet again though? I like studying with you, you’re a really good teacher.”

You blush harder, if that’s even possible. “Thank you, Sirius, that means a lot. How about tomorrow evening in the common room?”

“That sounds great, see you there.”

Gathering your things, you wave a final goodbye to Sirius before heading to Potions. You would be brewing Liquid Luck today and you needed to focus, however your mind kept drifting back to Sirius. You felt like a teenager with her first crush, it seemed like Sirius had taken up your entire mind, the butterflies in your stomach fluttered every time you thought of the study session tomorrow evening. Twice, Slughorn had to pull your attention back to the class, it looked like when Sirius was on your mind, your mind went to goo.

The following day passed by slowly as if it knew that you had something to look forward to. Classes dragged and more than one teacher had to bring your attention back to the class since your mind had wandered off to what could possibly happen that evening.

You had seen Sirius once all day; at lunch where he waved at you from his place further down the table where he sat with the Marauders. “Are we still on for this evening, (Y/N)?”, he had shouted causing multiple heads to turn towards you.

You blushed deeply, “We are! I’ll see you this evening, Sirius.”

He smiled widely at your answer and threw a thumbs up before leaving the Great Hall with the Marauders.

That had been hours ago, and you were finally in your last class of the day. You were never normally eager to leave a lesson, but you had fallen into your feelings for Sirius and well, you wanted to see him even if he didn’t feel the same way as you.

Finally dismissed, you practically sprinted to your common room so you could change into comfortable clothes and grab the books you thought you may need.

You meet Sirius at a table in the corner of the common room; an intimate choice you note with the warmth of the fire wrapping you in a bubble. You also notice the rest of the Marauders not too far away, watching with eager arms – both James and Remus wiggle their eyebrows at Sirius.

“Okay,” You start, sitting down. “Where did we get to yesterday?”

Sirius beams at you, and you begin to study.

Two hours you sat there; studying for the first part of it, talking for the second part. Both of you had sat there and talked about anything and everything – Sirius asking question after question on you and your family; what were they like? Did you have siblings? All sorts was asked, and you didn’t mind opening up to him. You knew better than to ask about his family, it wasn’t a secret that he had run away from home and was living with James. However, you did ask him about his friends – what they did, how did they come to know one another.

Conversation flowed between the two of you until you couldn’t stop yawning. You decided then that it was time to wrap things up.

“I’ve really enjoyed myself tonight, Sirius.”

He quickly agrees, adding “I feel I understand the Great Muggle War a lot better now.”

“Good, I’m glad.” You answer, tidying up your books and notes.

Sirius grabs your hand, squeezes it gently before he brings it up to his lips and presses a small kiss to the back of it. Again, you’ve been reduced speechless and blushing by the teenager in front of you – you needed to do something about that.

“Goodnight, Sirius. I’m sure I’ll see you at some point tomorrow.”

“Goodnight, (Y/N). See you tomorrow.”

You pull your hand from his, and before your judgement can get the better of you, you place a lingering kiss to his cheek.

As you head back to your dormitory, you don’t see Sirius press his hand to his cheek in disbelief. His cheeks aflame with the mere touch of your lips to his skin.

Time with Sirius simply flew by. You didn’t realise how quick time passed when you were with him until you were rushing to class in the hopes of not being late. Sirius seemed to occupy your mind and your time; he could be a distraction, but you always managed to get some work done, and he helped you with topics you weren’t entirely confident on. The both of you had grown closer to the other, you had started spending time with all of the Marauders, but you were with Sirius for the majority of the time. It did nothing to help your feelings for him; they simply grew until you were fairly certain you were in love with him. At least, that what your dorm mates told you, they had pointed out how obvious it was that you both had feelings for each other and whilst you had confirmed yours to them, you believed that Sirius did not feel the same way, that he simply saw you as a good friend and study partner.

It is through one of your study sessions when Sirius interrupts your speech about wizarding society in the inter-war years focusing on the adventures of Newt Scamander and the publication of his book. He didn’t like to interrupt you, because not only did he not understand this aspect of the subject, but you got so animated and passionate that it brought out a side of you he adored, but he really needed to ask you something.

“Look, we’re throwing a party in the common room this Friday night. Will you come?”

“You’re inviting me to a party?”

“I am. Will you come?”

“I think I will.”

Sirius smiles at you, knocking you slightly breathless. Then he kisses you the cheek and you’re pretty certain that you’ve died now because his lips made contact with your skin and your heartrate hit the sky.

“Good, I’ll see you there.”

“You’ll see me beforehand, but yes you’ll see me there.” You whisper, too breathless to try to speak normally.

Friday came too quickly for your liking; you hadn’t even picked out an outfit which had led to your latest predicament - your entire wardrobe spread across the whole dormitory. It didn’t matter what your dorm mates said, you couldn’t find anything to wear and you were starting to feel like a stereotype in a bad film.

“Okay, that’s it. I’m calling it – I’m going to pick what you’re wearing and you’re going to deal with it.” Your dorm mate, Jenny states as she places her hand on the small of your back and guides you to your bed.

“Are you sure?”

“I’ve known you for what? Five/six years? I’m sure, now hush and let me work.”

You’re silent as Jenny goes through your wardrobe, placing item against item seeing what goes together.

“You must really like him.” Jenny murmurs.

“I really do. It honestly started as a little crush because he was pleasing to the eyes, and now that I’ve gotten to know him… well I’m worried that this could be it for me. That one great love all your books go on about.”

Jenny throws a blouse in your face, “You love those books, don’t hate on them.”

You laugh at her, feeling more at ease now than you had felt all day.

“Here you go, wear these and if he doesn’t kiss you by the end of the night, then I’ll hurl my romance books out of the astronomy tower.”

“I’ll hold you to that, I hope you know.”

She presses a kiss to your cheek, “I know, now get changed, I’m going to sort out my makeup.”

You change into the clothes that Jenny had chosen for you; figure hugging maroon flares that you didn’t realise you owned, with an airy white blouse that when tied at the front, showed enough of your stomach to not make you entirely self-conscious.  

When Jenny returns from the bathroom, she wolf-whistles and you contemplate throwing a show at her. She links her arms with yours and you head down to the common room, where you can hear music start to play.

You didn’t know parties would be so warm; it explained why so many got drunk at these things. Not just for pleasure, but to also cool down. Sirius had met you not long after you entered the common room, he kissed your cheek and complimented your outfit. You had thanked him, blushing all the while. You had wondered when you were going to get a grip in such things.

Music was playing, drinks were flowing, and you were enjoying yourself. You found yourself dancing with Jenny more often than not. You had danced with Sirius a couple of times, but he kept getting pulled away somewhere else. You had to admit it annoyed you, but he was the one throwing the party.

Deciding that you had had enough of dancing, you head back to the drinks table and grab yourself a drink that was definitely more alcohol than mixer. Jenny sidles up next to you, shouting over the music, “I think you’ve caught his attention.”

You grin widely, the alcohol taking over “Do you think?”

She nods, “He hasn’t been able to take his eyes off you all night.”

You feel giddy, elated. “I really like him.”

Jenny nods, “I know you do. He’s coming this way though, so maybe tell him, and not me.”

Jenny takes you by the shoulders and turns you around to face Sirius from where he’s walking across the common room to you. Jenny is still holding your shoulders when Sirius’ attention is pulled away from you and onto another girl. Jenny is also there when Sirius and the mystery girl start to kiss.

The breath is knocked out of you, Jenny’s hands slip from your shoulders, and you make your escape. Only just managing to get to your dorm room before starting to sob mercilessly.

Sirius pulls away from the girl immediately. His eyes search the room for you, but he can’t place you. He does find you friend Jenny watching him from the drinks table.

“Where is (Y/N)?”

“She left, Sirius.”

“Why? What happened? Is she okay?”

“I don’t think she is; she saw you kiss that girl.”

“Shit.”

“Shit indeed, Mr Black.”

“I didn’t kiss her, she kissed me.”

Jenny places a hand on Sirius’ arm, “It isn’t me you need to tell that to. She really likes you; I have never seen her this way about a boy before. Please be kind.”

“I will. I really like her as well, I’ve never felt this way about a girl, the last thing I want to do is screw this up.”

“I’m going to go check on her, I’ll see you later Sirius.”

Jenny leaves, while Sirius stands at the drinks table, planning out what he needs to do.

The rest of the night passes in a blur of tears; Jenny is there holding you through it, offering tissues and dramatic retellings of her romance books. Sirius tries to talk to you, but Jenny goes to the door, telling him it would be best to let the alcohol wear off and speak with sober minds. He understands, and he leaves.

The week after the party is emotional hell. All you want to do is fall back into your routine from before and sit with Sirius, but you simply couldn’t. he had cornered you in the common room one evening, “I need to talk to you, (Y/N).”

You whisper, “I know.”

“Please let me talk to you,” Sirius whisper, his voice breaking, a hand partly raised as if he wants nothing more than to grab your hand and keep you there.

You draw back, “Not yet, I need a little more time.”

He nods, the hope that had been flickering in his eyes dimmed slightly. He moves to one side, letting you pass. His heart breaking that little bit more with each step you took away from him.

You were dreading class; it would be an awful class; not the subject matter but the tension between you and Sirius. It had been more than a week since you had a proper conversation, since you had properly enjoyed his company without a worry. He had tried to catch your attention on several occasions, but you just weren’t ready – Jenny had fought for him, stating the plain fact that you would have to face him sooner instead of later.

Conversation in class is attempted on his end, but all you can see as you look at him is him kissing that girl. The class passes by slowly, your need to speak to your Professor increasing. You almost shout in glee when she dismisses the class. You do not miss how quickly Sirius gathers his things and leaves.  

“Professor?”

“Yes (Y/N)? What can I help you with?”

“Why did you sit me next to Sirius?”

“What do you mean? Are you not happy with your assigned seat?”

“Yes, and no.”

Your Professor nods, “I see what’s going on here. Sirius asked me to change the seating plan a few weeks ago.”

Your mouth drops open in shock, “He asked you to do what?”

“He asked me change the seating plan – he asked to be sat next to you. He argued that it was because you would be a good influence on him, and I agreed, but you could also tell that he harbours some feelings for you.”

You stay silent at your Professor’s words. She nods, “I understand now, his feelings are returned, I see. This is interesting.”

“Thank you Professor for letting me know.” You gather your books and bag, ready to go. You needed to have a conversation with Sirius, and you needed to have it now.

“No problem, (Y/N). Hope everything works out.”

“Thank you,” You rush, “I hope so too.”

You run back to the common room; hoping to catch Sirius there. As luck would have it, upon your entering the common room, you catch sight of the messy-haired teenager, sitting on his own by the fire. He looks up as you enter, as if he knew that it would be you to enter through the portrait. He averts his eyes quickly though, and it hurts. It hurts you because you feel utterly to blame for the breakdown in relations between Sirius and yourself; he had started to open up to you, become comfortable with you and you drew away, and left him hanging. It seems you hadn’t just broken your own heart.

“Sirius?” You murmur, walking over to the boy who has had your heart for two years.

He doesn’t answer, but he doesn’t leave either. There’s a million things running around in his head – you hurt him by pulling away, by avoiding him. You never gave him a chance to explain what happened at the party; that he didn’t kiss that girl, that the minute she had kissed him, he pushed her off and started to look for you. Only to find out from your friend that you had left, that you had seen what had happened.

“Sirius, I came to apologise. I’ve been a bit of a bitch if I’m honest.”

His head whips around to you, his grey eyes now focused solely on you. “What?”

Fiddling with your fingers, you say “I came to apologise. I shouldn’t have reacted the way I did, I shouldn’t have pulled away. You have these walls and when you’re with the Marauders, they’re down and they had started to come down with me and you were beginning to open up and then everything happened. At the party, when I saw you kissing that girl, I just lost it. Sirius, you have to understand, I have had feelings for you for a long while now and seeing you kissing that girl when we had grown so close, I got jealous and I got upset. You have a reputation, Sirius, and I thought that you would only ever see me as a friend, as someone to help you with schoolwork. I didn’t even let you explain your side of the story. I spoke to Professor just now to ask why she had sat us next to each other, and she had told me you asked to be moved to be next to me, and everything clicked into place. I shouldn’t have taken it out on you the way I did though, and I am so sorry.”  

Sirius is silent for a few minutes; taking in everything that you’ve just thrown at him. You sit down next to him on the couch and watch the fire.

His voice is hoarse when he starts to speak, “I do have a reputation, but since spending time with you, I have only wanted to be with you. I didn’t kiss her. She kissed me, that’s what happened. I was on my way to find you, to speak to you when she pulled me to her and kissed me. I pulled away immediately, I didn’t want her, I wanted you, I wanted to kiss you. Once I had gotten over to you, your friend Jenny had told me you left and that you had seen what happened. When I got to your dormitory and you wouldn’t answer me, I thought I’d talk to you in class, but you ignored me. When you did talk to me, it was so formal, I thought we had moved past that. It hurt, I feel silly for confessing it, but it hurt. I’ve got feelings for you too, and to see you revert to what we were like before, I was crushed.”

“I am so sorry, Sirius.” Your voice breaks on his name, your eyes shining with unshed tears.

“I’m sorry too. I feel like we could have avoided everything if we simply spoke to each other.”

“You have nothing to be sorry for. However, that girl who kissed you without permission has a well-fashioned hex coming her way.” You frown, not happy with the idea of someone forcing themselves onto Sirius.

“Now that is something I would pay to see.”

“Can you forgive me, Sirius?”

He looks at you startled, “What?”

“I’ve been a fool, a complete fool.”

“As long as you’re my fool.”

You laugh through the tears that are now falling freely. Sirius pulls you to him, places his hands on either side of your face, his thumbs brushing away the tears. You place your hand on top of his, keeping it pressed to your cheek.

“Sirius, I’m not sure if you know this, but I’m about 99% sure I’m in love with you.”

He smiles down at you, a blinding smile. “I’m not sure if you’re aware, but I feel the same.”

“What do you say? Shall we try doing this the right way?”

“I really like the sound of that.”

“I do too.”

Sirius dips his head, and his lips are pressed to yours. You fit together seamlessly. If you could bear the stormy weather, you could bear it all.

[halothenthehorns]

TLTNL- THE SECOND WAR BEGINS

Harry couldn't really look Remus in the face when he gave the book a gentle toss to him. He was sure it meant something he was even still around after all this, but Harry really had not a clue what, it couldn't be him. 

Entitled He Who Must Not Be Named Returns, it starts with a statement from the Minister confirming this to be true, he was active in their country once more.

"Miracles do happen!" James mock cheered.

"James I would not refer to any of this as miraculous," Lily grumbled.

"No, not the part about- you know what I meant Lily," he huffed.

"Oh, you're reading a paper," Sirius quickly grasped while still laughing at the two.

"Hermione was," Harry corrected, the memory easily swimming to the surface, honestly grateful that something could flow back to him naturally.

It was with great regret that he confirmed Lord, well you know who he meant,

"Lord Byron?" Remus politely offered.

was alive, as well as the dementors had deserted Azkaban and joined Lord, Thingy.

Five collective snorts of laughter. It seemed impossible after all they'd heard, but honestly with that alone Fudge pulled a genuine smile of amusement from all of them, though it was perhaps tainted at the implausibility of this taking so long to post this, a year later.

  The magical community was urged to remain vigilant, the Ministry was doing all they could to make people aware and pamphlets would be sent to their homes in the coming months of how to prepare.

The smile slipped right back off for the four from this time, they didn't appreciate the reminder considering they got those once a week it felt like.

The Minister's statement was met with dismay from the wizarding community, considering as recently as last week he'd just been assuring none of this to be true.

"I've been wanting them to eat their words, and yet it's not anywhere near as satisfying as I'd have hoped," Harry grumbled.

Details leading to this event were still murky, but apparently He Who Must Not Be Named himself and a group of Death Eaters had penetrated the Ministry of Magic Thursday evening and been witnessed.

Albus Dumbledore has yet been available for commentary, though it was he who had been insisting since last June of these events occurring. Meanwhile, the Boy Who Lived-

Hermione interrupted herself to exclaim there was Harry's name, she knew he'd be dragged into this while looking at him over her paper.

"Aren't I always?" Harry grudgingly agreed with Hermione now as he had then.

"Haven't heard you called that in a while," James grumbled, "it was kind of nice."

"I'll still take that over what they were calling him," Lily huffed.

They were in the Hospital Wing, Hermione reading her article of the Sunday Prophet to the five around her while still in bed. Neville and Ginny's injuries had been healed instantly, but continued to visit frequently as they were now, and Luna was sitting to the side apparently ignoring them all with a new copy of the Quibbler.

Ron was still in bed rest as well and glared from his to hers saying it was high time they switched back from thinking him a deluded show off.

"Where on earth will they find their source of entertainment now," Sirius said deadpan.

He helped himself to another Chocolate Frog, the scars on his arm still visible from where the brain had latched on. Madam Pomfrey had warned they may never fade, but with a solution she'd been applying, they'd been improving.

"I'm just happy he's not acting like Sirius anymore," Remus offered.

"When do I ever act like a loopy fool?" Sirius demanded.

"As much," Remus finished as if he hadn't been interrupted.

Hermione agreed they were far more complimentary of him now, quoting such thing as his lone voice of truth against slander, though they seemed to have failed to mention it was them doing the slandering.

James's eyes went mock wide in surprise, putting his hand against his cheek with his mouth open slightly as the picture of shock.

"They would never do such a thing, oh wait," Lily briskly agreed.

She winced slightly and placed her hand upon her ribs. The curse Dolohov had set on her may have been less effective silent, but in Madam Pomfrey's own words, it was quite enough damage to be going on with. Hermione was having to take ten potions a day to heal,

Harry gulped and still fidgeted heavily. He in no way wished to ever hear of that spell again, but he had the nasty feeling it wasn't the last time Dolohov used such a thing, and next time it may not be so nonverbal...but then the hateful pain returned, and Harry still knew it wasn't over. Even if some part of him larger than ever wanted to quit now before he had to ever feel what he was again for what he'd lost that day, his mind would permanently suffer for it.

but she was improving greatly, and already bored with the hospital wing.

She continued reading snippets of all the pages full of information now, even one where they'd apparently gotten an Exclusive Interview with Harry, but then noted it was just the old article from the Quibbler.

Sirius got a hearty snort for that, somehow his disgust for that rubbish increasing even when they were back to publishing sense.

Luna agreed her father had sold that to him, he'd gained quite a lot of money for it, and they were going on vacation this summer to try and find the Crumple-Horned Snorkack.

"Good for her," Remus said honestly.

Hermione struggled for a moment before simply saying it sounded lovely.

Harry and Ginny caught eyes and quickly looked away from each other grinning.

Harry almost got a smile back in place, more warmth than they'd seen in his expression since he'd come back from the Ministry. Sharing a joke like that really could do wonders.

Hermione changed topics by asking that the school was back to normal?

Ginny agreed Flitwick had ridden the school of the twins swamp

James gasped, all of the boys looking scandalized such a thing had been done while Lily rolled her eyes at them. "Honestly, did you want it up forever? Having to get through a swamp just to attend classes?"

"Yes," was their instant response, and she rolled her eyes again to try and hide a twitching smile.

in three seconds, but he'd left a tiny patch under a bit of window he'd roped off.

"Oh, well that's okay then," Sirius' shoulders were still slumped in a bit of disappointment, but at least there had been a mark left.

When Hermione asked why, she said he'd said it was too good a bit of magic.

"At least we can still say we love Flitwick," Remus chuckled.

Ron agreed through a mouthful of frog he'd left it as a monument to Fred and George.

"And that's exactly what any proper man would do," James smirked.

Informing Harry it was his brothers who'd sent the pile of sweets on his bedside.

"Aww," Lily cooed.

"I can see where Ron gets this idea to share food to make others feel better," Sirius chuckled, "I think it's what the twins do."

"Well they did try to share a toilet seat, so I wouldn't put it past them," Remus snickered.

Hermione looked rather disapproving and asked,

Harry glanced around, but not one of them made a snippy comment for Hermione's disapproval again. They were still reeling from their harsh reactions to her, to what she'd been saying and it turning out to be true...and they didn't know what to feel about her now.

if all of the trouble was gone now Dumbledore was back.

Neville agreed the school was right back to normal.

"I'd almost be depressed if I wasn't so relieved," James sighed.

Ron made the comment Filch must be happy about that while propping up a Dumbledore Chocolate Frog card against his water jug.

James scoffed deeply in disgust for that, he knew how he felt about that one!

Remus' voice held an edge as well none had ever heard before when speaking of him, but Remus kept going trying to ignore it himself.

Ginny promised he was miserable, saying she'd been the best thing to ever happen to this school.

All five of them looked more than sour for that being said, they honestly wished Filch would be thrown out when Umbridge left as well for what he tried to do to those students, but if they'd had their way, Snape would have long since left as well.

All six of them looked around. Professor Umbridge was lying in a bed opposite them, gazing up at the ceiling.

"I can not believe you're even in the same room with, with that-" Lily was so angry her words spluttered off in disgust. That cat litter should be in Azkaban for what she nearly did to Harry!

"Neither can I," James quirked a brow in surprise even as he was frowning in disappointment. "How on earth did the centaurs give her up? I was hoping her body would just never be found again!"

Dumbledore had strode alone into the Forest to rescue her from the centaurs; how he had done it - how he had emerged from the trees supporting Professor Umbridge without so much as a scratch on him - nobody knew, and Umbridge was certainly not telling.

Remus muttered something shrewdly as he eyed that. He tried to find the awe and fascination from his youth at the entity that was Dumbledore, how he truly seemed able to do anything, but it was still overshadowed by everything he'd done to Harry's life. It was much easier to focus on the idea of why he'd bothered, and he got no more answer for that.

Since she had returned to the castle she had not, as far as any of them knew, uttered a single word. Nobody really knew what was wrong with her, either. Her usually neat mousy hair was very untidy and there were still bits of twigs and leaves in it, but otherwise she seemed to be quite unscathed.

"Oh right, about that," Sirius gave a dramatic pause, taking a deep breath, before being just one tone away from shouting, "how dare she do that to you! If you hadn't f'ing known how to do the Patronus charm thanks to Remus, you'd be worse than dead! I swear if I don't hear of that wretched thing getting Kissed herself, I'm going to have to find some other way to suck out her soul!"

"Been holding that one in long?" Harry asked mock pleasantly.

"A bit, yeah," Sirius agreed. "Glad you gave me the chance to bring it up again."

Hermione said Pomfrey told she was in shock.

"Madam Pomfrey should be using shocks," Lily huffed.

Sulking more like, Ginny corrected.

James made a little noise that may have been a mocking laugh.

Ron said she did something when you did this, and he began clip-clopping his tongue softly in a mockery of hooves.

All five burst into righteous laughter, but there wasn't a trace of humor to be found. Honestly they just wanted to applaud Ron for finally giving this moment.

Umbridge sat up at once, her mousy hair wild.

Pomfrey stuck her head out at once, asking if everything was alright?

Once Umbridge had looked all around and seen nothing, she sank back onto her seat, uttering it must have been a dream.

"More like a nightmare," Remus corrected in the most pleasant tone he'd ever used when speaking of her.

Hermione asked if Firenze was still teaching divination now that Trelawney was back?

Harry said both were now teaching instead.

"Of all the classes to get two separate teacher's in," Sirius muttered, ignoring the harsh thump that was his innards at the reminder of her.

Ron said he was sure Dumbledore now wished he'd gotten rid of Trelawney when he'd had the chance while going for his fourteenth Frog.

"That suddenly made a bit more sense," Sirius said restlessly.

"Can't have just been Dumbledore doing a decent thing, standing up to Umbridge and not letting her leave," Lily said, all wistfulness gone of anyone just doing a kind act anymore.

"Oh no," James agreed, "he was keeping her away from Voldemort." He tried to end with a smile for her, knowing what that downturn of Lily's lips were, and she did feel just a bit better that even with an ulterior motive she wasn't the only one trying to find the kindness in all this.

Though Ron still found the whole subject useless, as Firenze wasn't much better.

Hermione demanded how he could say that, now that they knew prophecies were real.

"Doesn't make the idiots delivering them any better." Sirius honestly having the urge to go find that room and smash every one of those things now, regretting ever even hearing about them for all the trouble they'd caused his family!

Harry's heart began to race. He had not told Ron, Hermione or anyone else what the prophecy had contained. Neville had told them it had smashed while Harry was pulling him up the steps in the Death Room and Harry had not yet corrected this impression.

"I don't see why," James said haughtily. "You need a good laugh, and you're friends will do a better job than anyone telling you how ridiculous it all sounds."

"Now you're encouraging Hermione are you?" Harry asked dully.

James frowned in concern, they all did as Harry refused to shake this off in here like they were trying to give him a way to do, and for his careless tone alone James chose not to respond in hopes changing the subject would just be better.

He was not ready to see their expressions when he told them that he must be either murderer or victim, there was no other way . . .

Even as the others still looked murderous at Dumbledore putting that on Harry, wanting to blame their old headmaster and everyone else for continuing to try and force Harry down a path just because of some stupid mystics, Harry couldn't help but brush absently at his scar for the first time since he'd been here, because it wasn't the one on his forehead. None of them seemed to notice a thing. He wished he could believe same as them, that there was some other way, some alternative to this terrible fate laid out for him, but it all felt so inevitable...

Hermione kept going with the conversation, saying what a pity it was it broke.

Ron agreed, but found the good side was at least You-Know-Who couldn't hear it anymore either- then asked where Harry was going with disappointment.

Harry said he was going down to Hagrid's, he'd gotten back today and he'd want to know how they were doing.

"Hagrid's back!" Sirius cheered unnecessarily loudly, but Harry hardly reacted, just the briefest little smile for the enthusiasm before his face settled back into that mask of unease.

Ron gave the grumpy agreement before wishing he could come.

Remus made an unconscious sympathetic noise, knowing that feeling all to well.

Hermione told him to say hello for them, and to make sure to ask about his, little friend.

"I presume she's referring to Grawp," Remus said with an honest twitch of his lips.

"Don't know why she needed to phrase it like that," Sirius sighed, "I think the others around you can know about him by now." He was still watching Harry with worry. He may be clinging to Sirius in a whole new way, though now they understood why as he just seemed to be marveling at still being able to do so, but it almost seemed to hurt him now just to look at his godfather.

"Umbridge is in there, and even in shock, it's best not to go sharing what Hagrid gets up to right now," James unnecessarily reminded, Sirius had been well aware, they were both just trying to keep up some normal flow of conversation no matter how ineffective.

He was finding it hard to decide whether he wanted to be with people or not; whenever he was in company he wanted to get away and whenever he was alone he wanted company.

Harry was torn from his own thoughts to watch those shift around him uncomfortably, and quickly said, "No, I'm not..." but he trailed off, unable to put into words what it meant to have them all around him now. He didn't want that now, but it didn't quite erase the feeling now residing in him.

The feeling of isolation he'd carried while being around his friends carried through in here, helped along nothing by their unwillingness to see what he saw, feel how true it was he must kill Voldemort. If they didn't understand that though, if they honestly thought there must be another way...

When Harry failed to give a real answer but instead was clearly struggling with something, Remus just decided to keep going. He wouldn't force a real answer out of him, but he wouldn't stop him either if he needed a minute to himself, but until he stepped out this was all they could really do.

He only made it to the Entrance Hall when he ran into Malfoy and his friends coming up from the Slytherin dormitories.

The instant they caught sight of each other, Malfoy at once declared Harry as dead.

Harry said that was funny, since if it were true he'd have stopped walking around.

James managed an authentic laugh again, telling Harry, "there's that sense of humor I so love."

Harry tried for the same smile back, but it still sat just a touch awkwardly in his face to be believable.

Malfoy ignored the jab and said Potter would pay for what he'd done to his father.

"Will he still have to hear about it then to?" Sirius rolled his eyes.

James couldn't even offer that much, whatever Malfoy was suffering was only a tenth of what Harry had already learned to suffer through.

Harry sarcastically told he was terrified now, Voldemort must have just been a warm up compared to these three.

All of them were laughing obligingly now, though Harry's frown just deepened with some unknown concern, all he knew was he didn't like dismissing Malfoy right now.

Malfoy just snapped Potter thought himself such a big man, he couldn't just land his father in prison!

Harry reminded he just had.

Remus couldn't help the surprised burst of laughter that shot out, it really was like watching James and Snape the way these two went at each other so many years later with the names just swapped.

Malfoy still vowed Azkaban wouldn't hold him with the dementors gone, and while Harry agreed, he still pointed out at least everyone knew what scumbags they were now.

Sirius tried for a triumphant little smirk, but it was no good, the mention of that place just brought the echo of his own words back. He really hadn't been given his chance to accept that worthless Ministry's apologies now that they were listening to Harry...

Malfoy went for his wand, but Harry had already beaten him to it and raised to strike when Snape appeared.

Harry froze with a loathing like none before for him. He didn't care what Dumbledore said, he would never forgive Snape.

While none gave a second of disagreeing as well, Harry couldn't help but look to his mother. Her face was a mask, lips trembling and white from feeling so much of this future. He almost believed that now as well, but then, there was just this one part of him that stopped him...

Snape demanded what Potter was doing?

Harry simply said trying to decide which curse to use on Malfoy.

Lily at least tried to hide her smirk for that, but even she failed at such boldness.

Snape tried to take points away from his house for this, but then he turned and realized the Gryffindor hour glass was completely empty. He instead began to threaten-

but was cut off by McGonagall arriving to state apparently they needed some more.

The room felt such a sudden rush of delirious happiness it was hard for a moment to even grasp the switch. None had exactly forgotten what had fallen their favorite teacher, but considering everything else that had happened in the meantime they hadn't even a second to spare for it. Now here she was again as if she'd never left, swooping in for Harry once again!

She beckoned to Crabbe and Goyle first off, depositing her bag onto them and telling them to take that up to her office

"Snappy as ever," Sirius chuckled pleasantly.

before continuing to address their head of house that the students should be awarded for alerting the world of You-Know-Who's return.

James whooped with a delirious noise, even just something slightly good happening again and he wanted to dance and cheer, finally just one moment to show the word wasn't all death in this future!

Snape merely sneered rather than agreeing.

"Eat your toes Snivlius," Sirius sneered.

"It's eat your words. How did you even-?" Remus began in confusion, but Sirius wasn't even listening as he was still laughing too hard.

McGonagall continued as if he had, awarding fifty points to both Weasley's, Longbottom, Granger, and Potter. Even as they watched, a shower of rubies fell into Gryffindor's house-glass.

"Now wait a moment," Lily couldn't help but try to insert even as her eyes were still gleaming, but Remus polity shushed her and said what he knew she'd been fixing to.

Then she tacked on a fifty for Miss Lovegood of Ravenclaw, and a sprinkle of Sapphires fell for that as well.

"Ah," Lily said pleasantly while the boys were still snickering away, even Harry cracked an honest grin again for this.

She did acknowledged that Snape had intended to take ten, and while the measly few flew back up, it still left a respectable amount below.

"Only two hundred and forty," Remus quickly did the math even as he couldn't stop himself smirking. "She's much less generous than Dumbledore, he probably would have given a couple hundred each."

"Can't win that cup every year I suppose," Harry said grudgingly, his mind not even on the subject anymore as something as silly like the House Cup felt like some far off fantasy of a worry.

Then she instructed the students to depart, and Harry at once went back on his way into the sunshine outside.

Students were all over the place out here, enjoying their last few days on the grounds. Many waved or called to him as he passed, like the Prophet, now seeing him as some kind of hero.

"Give them all the bird Harry," James pleasantly instructed.

Harry said nothing to any of them.

"A feat not any in here could manage I'm sure," Lily said pleasantly, she'd have a thing or two to say to anyone switching on a dime like this, Ron's ire of Quidditch team hopping would hold nothing.

He had no idea how much they knew of what had happened three days ago, but he had so far avoided being questioned and preferred to keep it that way.

He thought at first when he knocked on Hagrid's cabin door that he was out, but then Fang came charging around the corner and almost bowled him over with the enthusiasm of his welcome.

Harry felt that pang shoot through him all over again, his hand growing painful around Sirius. This was ridiculous, Fang looked nothing like Padfoot...

Hagrid, it transpired, was picking runner beans in his back garden, and he came around to greet Harry and offer him a cup of dandelion juice.

"Should we be as worried about this as the rest of Hagrid's cooking?" Sirius said extra loudly just to get that look away from Harry's face even for a moment, he couldn't stand seeing his little pup in such misery every time something related back to him. It was killing him he'd been going through all of this in his past, and Sirius would do everything in his power to correct that now.

Once they were inside with a glass each, Hagrid asked how he was feeling?

"Dandoliney," James tried hard for a smirk and a joke, and Remus helpfully played along.

"Prongs, you can't substitute a weed for a fruit and get the same affect," Remus corrected.

"Says who?" James rebuked, before concluding, "Hark, look who's talking, you once switched armadillo bile with your own," James really did smirk then.

"It wasn't my fault breakfast wasn't agreeing with me that morning," Remus said tragically.

Harry could tell from his look of concern he did not mean psychically, but he simply fibbed he was fine and kept the conversation away from himself asking where he'd been?

Hagrid said hiding up in the mountains, like Sirius once had-

He stopped when he realized what he'd said, and feebly finished with he was back now.

"Subtle," Lily whispered, unlike the boys not pretending she couldn't see Harry's eyes swimming again. Sirius staying in those caves had almost been a good laugh at the time considering how well he knew the area, and suddenly the idea of if it had all been different just wasn't avoidable. If he'd just stayed up there instead of that ghastly house, if everything had been the way it should have and he'd never had to be there at all, if...

Harry instantly switched to saying Hagrid looked better, his old injuries from Grawp almost all faded.

It took a moment for Hagrid to realize what he meant and agreed Grawp was doing much better now, seemed right glad to have him back.

"I imagine that actually would have caused another injury," Sirius stated too loudly again, but he'd keep talking this way until the others stopped looking at him that way.

He was actually considering starting to look for a lady friend for him.

"Please tell me he's joking!" Lily yipped with more volume than Sirius had and easily capturing all attention.

"If he can get one for Aragog he would do it for anyone," James said without remorse.

"Hagrid's certainly becoming more interesting with this whole dating set up thing, maybe he should have a crack at Moony," Sirius smirked while Remus scowled hatefully for that.

Harry normally would have tried to persuade him otherwise, but he just hadn't the energy.

"Well you're just no help at all Harry," Remus grumbled instead of continuing to glare at Sirius.

Hagrid seemed to realize this and leaned forward to speak to Harry,saying he knew this was the way Sirius would want to go, in battle.

Sirius opened, then closed his mouth, he didn't have a true comment for that. The past twelve years of his life would have been a ruin, the last year possibly worse than anything those dementors could do. They ate away at your very soul just by being around, ruining anything happy you could hope to cling to...and then to be trapped in such a place where so many of all the worst memories would come back! Death honestly would have sounded more bearable after so many long months... he'd see James again...

Harry snapped back he hadn't wanted to go at all!

"But then there's that," Sirius sighed, couldn't speak aloud what had just pulsed through him, but he knew he wasn't doing a good job of hiding it at the panicky look from his brother. None of it would have mattered, the reason he had done what he was doing was for Harry, and now his godson spoke nothing but the truth. Sirius would do it all again just to be there for Harry in whatever way he had, no matter how short of time it was.

Hagrid bowed his head, but continued to speak quietly that he couldn't have lived with himself if he'd done nothing when Harry had needed help-

Harry's throat burned as he heard all that. He meant to hold it in, he really did, but then Sirius began to speak, and Harry burst. "I don't want to hear it! I don't give a damn! You still, you-" he was just left covered in ice, the fire instantly forgotten as Sirius' studious expression didn't change.

He would have lived, but he wouldn't be the man Harry had grown to admire and love.

Sirius didn't speak when he saw it all, that Harry had understood no matter how much he'd hate him for it.

Harry leapt up, telling he was going to visit Ron and Hermione at the hospital wing.

Hagrid looked upset,

'After what he just did, I'm not surprised,' Lily honestly agreed. Those had been the words Harry had needed to hear, but there was never a time to say them.

but did not stop Harry, only asking him to come back soon-

Harry was closing the door before he was done.

People still waved cheerfully to him, the sun shone bright above, but he wished they'd all just go away. A few days ago, before his exams had finished and he had seen the vision Voldemort had planted in his mind, he would have given almost anything for the wizarding world to know he had been telling the truth, for them to believe that Voldemort was back, and to know that he was neither a liar nor mad. Now, however . . .

Harry stayed nestled into Sirius' side, his heart feeling as heavy as it had back then no matter how much his mind told him to put it all away and be here with Sirius now while he had every chance he could. It wasn't quite working, the pain from his past would not fade no matter the replacement he had now.

He walked a short way around the lake, sat down on its bank, sheltered from the gaze of passers-by behind a tangle of shrubs, and stared out over the gleaming water, thinking . . .

Perhaps the reason he wanted to be alone was because he had felt isolated from everybody since his talk with Dumbledore.

"Harry," Sirius whispered for him alone, knowing his parents, that anyone else could have said the same, but Harry needed this to come from him. "You'll do what you think is right."

Harry closed his eyes and pinched the bridge of his nose hard, but it didn't stop the traitorous tears coming again. It was all to real, he could have opened them again and been back on that lake edge, the ghost of Sirius' voice whispering in his ear an assurance he'd needed that no one had been left to give.

Remus wished it would have just ended there, that this stupid thing was done. No more should have been said or done, but he also couldn't just stop. Harry needed some closure, and while he couldn't imagine how he was going to get it from that time, it felt impossible right now any of them were capable of doing so, only a reminder of everything he'd lost in his life while living through it all again.

He sat there for a long time, gazing out at the water, trying not to think about his godfather or to remember that it was directly across from here, on the opposite bank, that Sirius had once collapsed trying to fend off a hundred Dementors . . .

James had felt the bitter taint of regret, of not being there for those who needed him since the very beginning, and now even that moment felt like it was being torn away. Prongs had only been delaying the moment, he hadn't really the chance to save anyone.

The sun had set before he realized he was cold. He got up and returned to the castle, wiping his face on his sleeve as he went.

Sirius kept frowning as Harry tried to do the same now. He'd never wanted to be the cause of so much grief to his godson, to anyone.

Ron and Hermione left the hospital wing completely cured three days before the end of term. Hermione kept showing signs of wanting to talk about Sirius, but Ron tended to make 'shushing' noises every time she mentioned his name.

Lily made a watery noise as she kept sniffling, like she was trying to giggle but the noise wouldn't come. She imagined herself the same way at least in that regards, she felt useless as a mother she didn't have to talk and pry things from him when these books were saying it all. She honestly wished Harry had the chance to speak this for himself, but he often chose not to and let that speak for him. She wanted to change that, but remained unsure how. She'd have to find a way to get him off his crutch soon.

Harry was still not sure whether or not he wanted to talk about his godfather yet; his wishes varied with his mood.

"I know I always loathe talking about him," James muttered as he ruffled up his hair in agitation. "He manages to turn all conversations about himself."

"A trait he learned from you," Remus muttered. The two couldn't help it, to take shots at their friend, at each other, it was one thing they could still do to each other this future hadn't yet taken away.

He knew one thing, though: unhappy as he felt at the moment, he would greatly miss Hogwarts in a few days' time when he was back at number four, Privet Drive.

Harry tried to clear his throat, but it still seemed filled with too much snot to hold anything. It didn't mean he wanted to think about that anymore than the others, and thankfully Remus hissed past the moment knowing it would come up again all too soon.

Even though he now understood exactly why he had to return there every summer, he did not feel any better about it. Indeed, he had never dreaded his return more.

Professor Umbridge left Hogwarts the day before the end of term. It seemed she had crept out of the hospital wing during dinnertime, evidently hoping to depart undetected,

"Which she deserves absolutely none of," Remus said in pure disgust.

but unfortunately for her, she met Peeves on the way, who seized his last chance to do as Fred had instructed, and chased her gleefully from the premises whacking her alternately with a walking stick and a sock full of chalk. Many students ran out into the Entrance Hall to watch her running away down the path and the Heads of Houses tried only half-heartedly to restrain them. Indeed, Professor McGonagall sank back into her chair at the staff table after a few feeble remonstrances and was clearly heard to express a regret that she could not run cheering after Umbridge herself, because Peeves had borrowed her walking stick.

The laughter that echoed through the room was long over due, but somehow far more lackluster than any ever would have predicted. After all she did to Harry, to that school, to so many people, this rather tame leaving of the post just did not feel as whelming as it should have. Then again, unless someone, Sirius, had arrived to escort her to Azkaban nothing would have felt as good.

Their last evening at school arrived; most people had finished packing and were already heading down to the end-of-term leaving feast, but Harry had not even started.

"Who did win the House Cup?" Lily insisted on keeping up the pleasant mood with any mundane topic she could.

"It was canceled, Dumbledore's reason was the Inquisitorial Squad made it too biased." Harry shrugged.

"Is that actually how he phrased it?" James said.

"No, he made some great speech announcement about Voldemort officially being back again, though Ron said he was just rubbing it in. What he actually said was something more along the lines of school unity and looking past all our differences to become one again in the face of-" he cut himself off with a heavy roll of his eyes. "I'm not Hermione, I don't remember the exact words. That's just what I got out of it."

"Fair enough," Remus agreed.

Ron was still trying to convince him to do it tomorrow, but Harry still convinced him to go on while he did this.

But when the dormitory door closed behind Ron, Harry made no effort to speed up his packing. The very last thing he wanted to do was to attend the Leaving Feast. He was worried that Dumbledore would make some reference to him in his speech. He was sure to mention Voldemort's return; he had talked to them about it last year, after all . . .

"I doubt he'd make two speeches," James tried to encourage, he couldn't imagine missing the last feast.

"The first wasn't really a speech so much as just an announcement," Harry shrugged in defense.

Harry pulled some crumpled robes out of the very bottom of his trunk to make way for folded ones and, as he did so, noticed a badly wrapped package lying in a corner of it. He could not think what it was doing there. He bent down, pulled it out from underneath his trainers and examined it.

He realized what it was within seconds. Sirius had given it to him just inside the front door of number twelve Grimmauld Place.

Harry's breath caught in his throat, he suddenly looked like he was going to be sick, and none of them looked any better. Remus could already feel small little shivers starting, he couldn't look at any of them, barely saying in a whisper.

Harry sank down on to his bed and unwrapped the package. Out fell a small, square mirror. It looked old; it was certainly dirty. Harry held it up to his face and saw his own reflection looking back at him.

He turned the mirror over. There on the reverse side was a scribbled note from Sirius.

This is a two-way mirror, I've got the other one of the pair.

James looked back on that moment, of feeling exasperated Harry had worried so much about Sirius. He hadn't found his son silly at all for thinking it, but even still, no matter how dark his mind had gone in offering what could happen to Sirius if he were to be caught again, he'd never wanted to imagine this all to come up again like this.

If you need to speak to me, just say my name into it; you'll appear in my mirror and I'll be able to talk in yours. James and I used to use them when we were in separate detentions.

Remus was stammering by the end, words becoming a blur as too many memories washed over him, over them all. Detentions, something as common to their life as homework, and still they'd refused to be apart, but he'd never want them back together again like this.

Harry's heart began to race. He remembered seeing his dead parents in the Mirror of Erised four years ago. He was going to be able to talk to Sirius again, right now, he knew it-

Sirius held Harry tight to him again, his frame going more pale by the second, his eyes wouldn't alight with that same hope in here and Sirius wasn't sure if it was age looking back or simply the boy in here couldn't even hold onto the same hope anymore with Sirius right beside him, his every being prepared for the blow he knew would come.

He called clearly for Sirius, and nothing happened. He tried again, using his full name, and still it only reflected his own face. Sirius hadn't had the mirror when he fell through...

"Magic can't bring back everything Harry," Lily couldn't seem to stop herself explaining, that burning look on his face compelled her to just say something. "The paintings, the ghosts, their just echos, can only do and say what they're magicked to do, not-" she stopped because it meant nothing to him. If this were true he would have long since had his parents back, there would never be such sadness in the world again. He just buried his face back into Sirius' shoulder, struggling to breath so much he was convinced he never properly could again.

Harry remained quite still for a moment, then hurled the mirror back into the trunk where it shattered.

James could all but hear the echo of the glass, feel that more than Harry understood. Sirius' last gift to him, from both of them, was as gone from his life as they were, leaving no more explanation than anything else they continued to be without. Where had those mirrors been all those years, where as the the other now? He didn't believe he'd get those answer's anymore than an explanation for why this had happened to a man who didn't deserve it.

He had been convinced, for a whole, shining moment, that he was going to see Sirius, talk to him again . . .

Disappointment was burning in his throat; he got up and began throwing his things pell- mell into the trunk on top of the broken mirror -

But then an idea struck him . . . a better idea than a mirror . . . a much bigger, more important idea . . . how had he never thought of it before - why had he never asked?

They weren't even sure if Harry could hear them. He wouldn't look up now, keeping his face away as if ashamed of what came next.

He was sprinting out of the dormitory and down the spiral staircase, hitting the walls as he ran and barely noticing; he hurtled across the empty common room, through the portrait hole and off along the corridor, ignoring the Fat Lady shouting behind him.

How could it be that the place was full of ghosts whenever you didn't need one, yet now . . .

Maybe it was because of the detachment from his memories, maybe it was because he had Sirius right now and he didn't want to see the look on his face for what came next, but as Harry felt Sirius tense and try to murmur something, all he could feel was his shameful wish for what his godfather could never have done.

He ran down staircases and along corridors and met nobody either alive or dead. They were all, clearly, in the Great Hall. Outside his Charms classroom he came to a halt, panting and thinking disconsolately that he would have to wait until later, until after the end of the feast . . .

Somehow it was even more painful Harry was forgetting another of Sirius' old things, and one they'd never even thought to bring up themselves. Did Sirius know Harry had the map? It had never really said, but Harry forgetting it now on top of everything couldn't have come at a worst time, they needed this to be done with. It was killing them all, more than having to listen to Sirius' fate, just to watch Harry cope through it all.

He found Nearly Headless Nick just as he was walking through an adjacent wall, and he popped his head back out to see who it was and walked properly out of the wall to greet him. Harry greeted him and tried to invite him into the classroom, but Nick hesitated for a long time before grudgingly going, saying he'd been expecting this.

Remus' face was flushed, eyes only on the book even as his mind wondered how many times a ghost had to have this conversation, how often he'd come across a crying student and the pearly white figures and had never thought about it more than that.

Harry was holding the door open for him, but he drifted through the wall instead.

"Ghosts," James tried to mutter petulantly, but it instead came out in his own ghostly tone.

He asked expecting what as he closed the door, but Nick didn't even look at him as he drifted to the window saying for young Harry to come talk to him, it happened often when students here had suffered a loss.

Harry refused to be deflected and said Nick was dead.

"Does the bluntness help the awkwardness?" Sirius asked him mock politely.

Harry didn't look up, though his shoulders eased just slightly from feeling the rumble of a chest beneath him. He already knew, even looking back, he couldn't have stood to see Sirius as that pearly figure for longer than a breath. To never truly have him again but a shell, an echo, it would have felt colder to him than his old cupboard ever had.

James wouldn't let the moment pass without saying though, "you'd know that better than anyone," because he could never stand wasting a single moment to talk to Sirius.

Sirius just smiled at him, the feeling just a bit forced as he could only imagine how much this was hurting James, how much every layer of this was just wrong for him. Sirius being dead and Harry feeling more for this than he ever had for his parents.

He was walking and talking though.

Nick took a long time in answering that not everyone could, only wizards.

Harry almost laughed in relief, thinking this was all his hesitation was and agreeing at once the person he was referring to was a wizard!

Nick still wouldn't look around when he said he wouldn't come back.

Harry asked who?

"Who were you talking about?" Remus couldn't help but look at him with great concern.

Harry forced himself to look up then, adjusting his glasses that were poking him in the face but still not really able to meet his eyes, just gestured wordlessly at Sirius, and Remus realized Harry had just refused to understand until it had been shoved in his face.

Sirius Black, Nick had said at once.

Harry said he could! Nick had!

Nick agreed wizards could leave an imprint of themselves on the earth, but it is only a pale trod from their living lives, very few chose to do it.

Harry said Sirius wouldn't matter if it was unusual,

"Well you got that one right," Lily managed a chuckle as she gave Sirius a little smirk which he all to happily returned.

he'd come back, he knew he would!

Harry was fixing his glasses stubbornly now, they might have gone a bit crooked from pressing his face so hard into them and that was why his vision was still a little blurry, surely he'd poked himself in the eye and that's why they were still watering, this was ridiculous, he knew with everything in him right now Sirius wouldn't come back.

"Harry," Sirius couldn't help but grab his wrist, to make him stop that before he took his eye out as his face continued to grow out of that sorrow and slowly into anger. "Harry you know I'd come back for you in any way I could, the real way. I'd have done anything to get back out of there, but only, only if it were real, if I was coming back, not-"

Harry jerked his arm free but forced himself to take a deep breath no matter how much it hurt. His lungs still weren't in working order anymore than his glasses, though he couldn't seem to find a thing wrong with either when he kept checking.

And so strong was his belief, Harry actually turned his head to check the door, sure, for a split second, that he was going to see Sirius, pearly-white and transparent but beaming, walking through it towards him.

Remus couldn't believe he was forcing himself to do this. He kept wondering, at the back of his mind, where he was, what was his useless self doing now instead of explaining to Harry Sirius would never have even considered doing such a thing, why was Nick having to be the one to answer for this.

Nick simply said he would not, he has gone on.

Harry demanded what that meant? What happened when you died? Where had Nick gone? Why doesn't everyone come back and this place was full of ghosts?!

They'd all asked these questions at some point, everyone at Hogwarts had to varying degrees. Never before for any of them had it felt so personal, or the answer so vital, even when already knowing what Nick would say.

Nick could only answer for himself, and he had no true answer. He'd simply, lingered. He'd been afraid of death, and he often wished it hadn't been so. He was neither here nor there...

'At what point does the mind and soul no longer intertwine,' the passage from an old book flitted through Lily's mind, when she herself had been looking into this very subject. Ghosts seemed to be the embodiment of that answer, and the moment she'd realized that she'd snapped the thing shut and had avoided the spectacular figures the rest of the day, too young then to fully grasp what she'd come across now, too young now to know that loss and still having to live through it.

He apologized for not being more help, and then he left.

Harry felt almost as though he had lost his godfather all over again in losing the hope that he might be able to see or speak to him once more.

"Miracles happen though," Harry muttered as he looked back to his godfather now, eyeing him with worry, his face flush and alive, gray eyes alert and bright for anything and everything. He did not know what had led him to this moment, but he knew, he would never regret it.

He walked slowly and miserably back up through the empty castle, wondering whether he would ever feel cheerful again.

It hurt, it was as fake as a dupe, but Harry smiled at Sirius, at all of them. He didn't know how, he could not imagine anything but the gray fog still trying to swallow him whole from his past, but he also knew with everything in him this was not true. Ron and Hermione were just down the stairs, and his friends would be there for him when he opened up to them. The ring glistened on his finger for a moment, a warmth unto itself promising a future he just couldn't envision right now.

He had turned the corner towards the Fat Lady's corridor when he saw somebody up ahead fastening a note to a board on the wall. A second glance showed him it was Luna. There were no good hiding places nearby, she was bound to have heard his footsteps, and in any case, Harry could hardly muster the energy to avoid anyone at the moment.

She gave him a vague wave, and he dully asked why she wasn't at the feast?

She said she'd lost her possessions and was trying to get them back, she was putting up signs asking the people to return them.

"They what?" Remus muttered in surprised outrage for what had just come out of his mouth.

"Kids," Lily muttered with a petulant eye on James, who batted his eyes innocently even though they remained rather hard and distant. He felt bad for Luna, but this still wasn't enough to distract him from what was going on in Harry's life, and so he waved Moony on so Lily couldn't start on what terrible youths they were again.

She spoke all of this serenely as she gestured towards the noticeboard, upon which, sure enough, she had pinned a list of all her missing books and clothes, with a plea for their return.

An odd feeling rose in Harry; an emotion quite different from the anger and grief that had filled him since Sirius's death. It was a few moments before he realized that he was feeling sorry for Luna.

James looked oddly at Harry, struggling a moment to see where he was coming from, but it came to him. Harry's face was still sad now, but for just a moment he had taken his mind off his own grief to see what was being done to others, something James had never bothered to do at any sense, at much of any age. Harry had briefly accused them of treating Luna as they once would have Snape, and while none of them had denied it, James suddenly liked to think he wouldn't have for this moment alone, the girl who made Harry see the outside world outside his own life.

Harry asked why they did that, and Luna said she wasn't sure, though she suspected it was because they found her odd. They called her Loony Lovegood you know.

"Yes well, so did they to Moony, but then again, maybe that's why we were the only fools who would tolerate him," Sirius smirked while Remus just smiled faintly and pretended to ignore him.

Harry offered to help her find it all, but Luna just kept smiling as she said it would all come back, it always did.

"She's so," Lily struggled for a word on this girl. She'd have been furious if someone had tired this on her, strung people up all along the castle if they'd even dared mess with her in this way. Serene was a good way to put it, very flowing. Luna simply accepted the way things were rather than trying to force people to behave how they should, and Lily found that honestly admirable, even while she'd be doing the same for Luna's things.

Then she asked why he wasn't at the feast, and he admitted he just hadn't felt like it.

Luna nodded as if she understood this, stating that the man that Death Eater killed had been his godfather, Ginny had told him. Harry nodded curtly, but found that for some reason he did not mind Luna talking about Sirius.

Sirius hummed thoughtfully, Harry noting he almost sounded like a pur rather than his usual dog like habits when he was content. Harry couldn't help the genuine smile that flit across his face then, even for a moment.

He suddenly remembered she could see thestrals to, and tried to politely ask who she'd seen die.

She told of her mother, who was an extraordinary witch who liked to experiment with Charms, and one had gone wrong. Luna had been nine.

Harry mumbled an apology for this, and Luna conversationally agreed how horrible it had been, and she was still very sad about it, but she still had her dad.

"Lucky her," James couldn't help but whisper, thankful only Remus had heard and he was politely ignored.

Though it wasn't as if she'd never see her again.

Harry asked about that, and Luna reminded of the room with the veil, Harry had heard them to.

Sirius couldn't help a well of panic for a moment. If Harry went back there, tried to get him out- he was being ridiculous, his mind instantly corrected. His godson was alive and safe right beside him. As desperate as he was, Remus had clearly gotten something through to him, that the veil was not the answer, there was no answer to making him come back. All that thing could ever do was taunt what Harry had lost.

Harry could think of nothing to say to that, and so again insisted he'd like to help her find her things.

Luna denied him though, saying she was done now and was going down to have some pudding. She wished Harry a good holiday, and he did so as well.

She walked away from him and, as he watched her go, he found that the terrible weight in his stomach seemed to have lessened slightly.

Sirius gave one last comforting brush to Harry, who leaned into the touch just like he always did, he couldn't imagine doing anything else.

The journey home on the Hogwarts Express next day was eventful in several ways. Firstly, Malfoy, Crabbe and Goyle, who had clearly been waiting all week for the opportunity to strike without teacher witnesses, attempted to ambush Harry halfway down the train as he made his way back from the toilet.

Remus gave a mock yawn. Considering Harry had bested all of their fathers and then some at the same time, this was beyond child's play to him. It was hard to imagine a worse pain to come than what they'd already suffered, certainly these school yard bullies held nothing.

The attack might have succeeded had it not been for the fact that they unwittingly chose to stage the attack right outside a compartment full of DA members, who saw what was happening through the glass and rose as one to rush to Harry's aid. By the time Ernie Macmillan, Hannah Abbott, Susan Bones, Justin Finch-Fletchley, Anthony Goldstein and Terry Boot,

"Hopefully Ron lets go of his grudge on those Ravenclaws now," James said with his first real attempt at a chipper tone, even being back on that bloody train which always spelled disaster considering who was waiting at the end very time, and the man who wasn't.

"Actually, I think Ginny broke up with him," Harry said in a light, rather forced conversational tone of voice. He wasn't sure where this idea came from, but he didn't feel much care for it either way. He really must have been desperate for anything to smile at, he certainly was doing so now at such a random bit of information.

had finished using a wide variety of the hexes and jinxes Harry had taught them, Malfoy, Crabbe and Goyle resembled nothing so much as three gigantic slugs squeezed into Hogwarts uniform as Harry, Ernie and Justin hoisted them into the luggage rack and left them there to ooze.

"Twice on these train rides, this is becoming a tradition I almost look forward to," Remus smirked.

Ron had stepped out to see the commotion and came across the end results, saying at least Goyle's mum would be pleased, he looked better now.

"And there's Ron, always making sure to note the important things," Sirius chuckled.

Harry thanked the others and accompanied Ron back to their compartment, where he bought a large pile of cauldron cakes and pumpkin pasties. Hermione was reading the Daily Prophet again, Ginny was doing a quiz in The Quibbler and Neville was stroking his Mimbulus mimbletonia, which had grown a great deal over the year and now made odd crooning noises when touched.

Lily brushed at her hair, her face distant with distress. The train ride to start all this, and they'd been worried about such things as Harry's crush and the Ministry. Now he was going through again a new person. Though having experienced death once before, this was still something new, even worse. His innocence kept being peeled away, though he'd never had much to begin with, and she worried how much more he could handle.

Harry and Ron whiled away most of the journey playing wizard chess while Hermione read out snippets from the Prophet. It was now full of articles about how to repel Dementors, attempts by the Ministry to track down Death Eaters and hysterical letters claiming that the writer had seen Lord Voldemort walking past their house that very morning . . .

Harry scoffed in disbelief even while he saw nothing of surprise on the others, and he shook his head sadly this was common for them.

Ron softly called his attention then, and Harry looked around. Cho was passing, accompanied by Marietta Edgecombe, who was wearing a balaclava.

"How long is that thing going to last?" Lily asked with the hint of worry now for what Hermione had done, had she really permanently scared that child for such a nasty trick.

"Never asked," Harry shrugged without much of a thought. "If I remember seeing her next year, I'll let you know."

His and Cho's eyes met for a moment. Cho blushed and kept walking.

They watched Harry curiously, but he seemed to be holding this with the same indifference as he had watching a little game of chess.

Harry looked back to his chess game with indifference. Hermione tentatively said she'd heard Cho was going out with someone else now.

"Well that was fast," James rolled his eyes.

"Honestly, it took longer than I expected," Sirius snorted.

Harry was surprised to find that this information did not hurt at all. Wanting to impress Cho seemed to belong to a past that was no longer quite connected with him; so much of what he had wanted before Sirius's death felt that way these days . . . the week that had elapsed since he had last seen Sirius seemed to have lasted much, much longer; it stretched across two universes, the one with Sirius in it, and the one without.

Harry was already struggling again, his composure as flimsy as paper in here. The feeling was growing rather than receding, of how to fit all three of these universes into his head. He knew it was ridiculous, he could treat Sirius the same way now as he had before all this, but at the same time it didn't feel right, just slightly off, as if here were disrespecting his own godfathers memories by joshing around with him as the younger carefree man he'd never known. It just wasn't sitting right, and he knew he needed time to come to term with all this, and just looked pleadingly at Remus to keep going, to finish this and give him that chance. While he'd avoided it in here, the feeling was creeping back now, he did want some alone time before he had to hear more.

Ron said he was probably better off, he needed someone a bit more cheerful. Then Ron asked Hermione who she'd heard she was with?

Hermione said Michael Corner, and Ron looked to his sister in surprise as that had been her boyfriend.

Ginny shrugged with as much care as Harry just had, saying he'd been a sore loser when Ravenclaw had lost the Quidditch Cup, so she'd ditched him and he'd gone to comfort Cho instead.

"What a smarmy little bloke, they deserve each other," James said without interest as he picked at his nails.

Ron looked highly delighted.

"I'm sure he did," Lily muttered with a small smile even as she kept watching Harry, who was at least pretending to keep listening with far more curiosity than was necessary, clearly still avoiding talking to them.

Then he said he hoped his sister found someone, better, next time, casting Harry an oddly furtive look as he said it.

Sirius gave a little wolf whistle while the others started snickering. Harry got a lopsided smile in place, his thumb twitching a bit now out of reflex to brush at his ring unconscionably. It was all still a joke of course, Harry told himself, Ron was only thinking this way to keep his sister away from others boys, he didn't really mean anything by it...

Ginny responded she'd chosen Dean Thomas, was that better?

"Err, no!" Remus yelped in surprise while Sirius and James laughed harder.

"What bloke dates a dorm mates younger sister, that's a spell for disaster if I've ever heard one," James rolled his eyes in agreement.

"Can you imagine the idiot?" Sirius demanded.

Ron shouted in such surprise he upended the chessboard.

As the train slowed down in the approach to King's Cross, Harry thought he had never wanted to leave it less.

"Wait, no, you skipped the best part!" Sirius yelped.

"Ginny told Ron to shut up, and he was in a temper the rest of the trip and muttering death threats to our dorm mate," Harry shrugged, even as at the time he'd agreed with Ron whenever demanded of, he'd mostly just been watching Ginny and that little smirk she'd kept hidden behind her paper for further irritating her brother in this way, it had been quite the show to watch and he'd wished the moment would never end.

He even wondered fleetingly what would happen if he simply refused to get off, but remained stubbornly sitting there until the first of September, when it would take him back to Hogwarts.

"I really do wish you'd find out what happened, just once, let that be now," Sirius said tragically, and it wasn't a farce at a all. It had been there for one shining glorious moment before it was wrenched away, and then it had been left to hover, fester, in the back while Sirius had been on the run, incapable of fulfilling what they'd wanted from the very beginning. Now it was gone, permanently. Harry would never be able to step off that train to a real home.

When it finally puffed to a standstill, however, he lifted down Hedwig' cage and prepared to drag his trunk from the train as usual.

When the ticket inspector signaled to Harry, Ron and Hermione that it was safe to walk through the magical barrier between platforms nine and ten, however, he found a surprise awaiting him on the other side: a group of people standing there to greet him who he had not expected at all.

There was Mad-Eye Moody, looking quite as sinister with his bowler hat pulled low over his magical eye as he would have done without it, his gnarled hands clutching a long staff, his body wrapped in a voluminous travelling cloak. Tonks stood just behind him, her bright bubble-gum-pink hair gleaming in the sunlight filtering through the dirty glass of the station ceiling, wearing heavily patched jeans and a bright purple T-shirt bearing the legend The Weird Sisters. Next to Tonks was Lupin, his face pale, his hair greying, a long and threadbare overcoat covering a shabby jumper and trousers.

Remus couldn't believe his eyes, just staring at that and sure he'd read that wrong until James began laughing beside him. It was wild, and jittery, but he clapped Remus on the shoulder and shouted right in his ear, "there's Moony always coming through for us."

Remus didn't even have it in him to pull away, rub at his ear for the volume, he seemed stumped at what to do with himself. Finally, just a small little part of their wish had been granted, and yet it felt as bitterly tainted as spoiled milk. Because there was still someone missing, there always would be now, and Remus had never been there a single moment before this for Harry. It felt meaningless he'd done it now.

The others clearly didn't agree, Sirius shifting restlessly and prepared to wrestle the book from him if he didn't keep going, to find out what this was about! Was it finally happening, had Dumbledore changed his mind and admitted to another way? Was the Order going to take Harry out from those Dursleys noses at last?!

If James prodding Remus in the side hadn't got him started Remus likely wouldn't have moved ever again, but he shook off the terrible thoughts of this future and forced himself to focus on the now, Sirius still smiling widely and eagerly at him, and so he crossed his fingers to do one thing right and read out a moment they all so desperately needed.

At the front were Mr. and Mrs. Weasley along with the twins, the mother already coming forward to hug her children. Ron took his absently as he kept eyeing the twins, demanding what they were wearing?

Fred said dragonskin jackets with pride.

"Treating themselves a bit," Lily muttered with a raised brow as Remus gave a low whistle of surprise.

"They deserve it," Sirius said at once, smiling widely at the prospect and honestly wanting to snap the book shut on Remus' fingers right there, just let this moment last forever.

Remus would have ignored him anyways, their fantasies would only be worse the longer they delayed moving on, so he kept going loudly to really see what all this was about.

Harry greeted them all, but couldn't help asking what they were doing here?

Lupin had a faint smile in place as he said they'd decided to have a little chat with his aunt and uncle before letting them take him home.

Lily groaned obnoxiously loudly and let her head flop back against her seat. It was so exaggerated Harry couldn't help bursting out with laughter seeing his mother do something like that, and so Remus' expression went unnoticed by everyone except James. He'd realized the moment that look had flitted across his friends face what he could have thought they meant, and while the hope had been there he'd never let this blame fall on him either. "Moony, I don't care what made you do it, you are! Be happy about something for once in your life! Those bloody Muggles needed someone to remind them of who they have to look after until you show up again!" He managed to hiss at him while the other three were distracted.

Remus just looked at him, unable to believe after all this time, after all he'd done, Prongs was still standing up for him, even against himself. He'd finally lost everything in this future, but here and now he couldn't help but smile while he kept going, clinging to the idea he wouldn't be alone here.

Harry at once said he didn't think that a good idea, but Moody corrected he did, and gestured over his shoulder confirming that as them.

Harry glanced slightly and found all three standing there, positively appalled at his reception.

"A gift in itself," Sirius nodded as if his wish really had been made. It wasn't on the same level as satisfying if Harry had just left with the people he should have, but honestly after so much misery he'd take what he could get.

Mr. Weasley seemed rather reluctant to turn away from greeting Hermione's parents, but was the one to say they should get this started.

"Be afraid," James said in a mock spooky voice.

The four crossed with Harry, Ron, and Hermione, Arthur still pleasantly speaking the greeting to them in hopes they'd remember him.

"Hard to forget the man," Lily managed in between a righteous little giggle.

As Mr. Weasley had single-handedly demolished most of the Dursleys' living room two years previously, Harry would have been very surprised if Uncle Vernon had forgotten him. Sure enough, Uncle Vernon turned a deeper shade of puce and glared at Mr. Weasley, but chose not to say anything, partly, perhaps, because the Dursleys were outnumbered two to one. Aunt Petunia looked both frightened and embarrassed; she kept glancing around, as though terrified somebody she knew would see her in such company.

"Come on universe, I don't care who, I want someone to appear and see her there," James said at once, anything to make this just marginally worse for the people who still deserved more than they were going to get, but this was the first time Moony had been in their company, and he wasn't going to be satisfied until they walked away with stains in their pants.

Dudley, meanwhile, seemed to be trying to look small and insignificant, a feat at which he was failing extravagantly.

"Better than trying to look intimidating, he'd just fail at that more," Sirius sneered.

Arthur was continuing his politeness as he said they'd decided to have a little chat with them about Harry-

and how he was treated when at their place, Moody interrupted with his growled voice.

"Be very afraid," Remus agreed with a slight smile now for this show.

Uncle Vernon's mustache seemed to bristle with indignation. Possibly because the bowler hat gave him the entirely mistaken impression that he was dealing with a kindred spirit, he addressed himself to Moody.

Five collective snorts of laughter for just how wrong that impression was, Harry's coming out a bit more runny than he'd meant to. His eyes were misting again. He didn't want to be reduced to tears again so soon, but he couldn't help it, he'd never in his life seen so many people to show him support like this...

Stating he was not aware that it was any of their business what went on in his house-

Moody interrupted again to state that he expected what Vernon wasn't aware of would fill several books.

Sirius gave a wild, unconstrained laugh that didn't stop for several minutes!

"That's too kind, I find encyclopedia far more accurate," Remus huffed.

"Credit for trying," Lily shrugged, she'd have been cheering them all on for someone finally doing something about this!

"Guess we'll just have to settle for these," James tried to roll his eyes like this was all fun.

Uncle Vernon swelled ominously. His sense of outrage seemed to outweigh even his fear of this bunch of oddballs.

"Oh he has no idea," Sirius muttered, his enthusiasm still prevailing over the little frown he carried and refused to acknowledge. What he would give to be there for Harry now, even more than ever before, as gratitude was washing over his little pup now like never before.

He demanded if he was being threatened?

Mad-Eye happily agreed he was, seeming rather pleased Vernon had grasped this so quickly.

"The man has one trick, and now they've all seen it," James sneered.

Vernon barked if he looked like a man who could be intimidated?

Moody began that yes, it seemed so, as he spoke he tipped his hat up so his eye was visible, and Vernon lept back with such shock he collided with a nearby trolley cart and both fell over.

Lily was giggling hysterically now, the triumphant feeling wouldn't fade that finally someone was standing up to that pompous blubber even if it wasn't the man they'd all been hoping for.

He turned away from Uncle Vernon to survey Harry, telling him to give a shout if he needed anything, and if they didn't hear from him for three days, someone would come along.

Remus gave his head a soft little annoyed shake, remembering Harry's second year and how he'd gone most of the summer without contact and it had been practically ignored, oh how things had changed, almost for the better, right? He tried to keep James' words in mind at least Harry could never be so ignored again.

Aunt Petunia whimpered piteously. It could not have been plainer that she was thinking of what the neighbors would say if they caught sight of these people marching up the garden path.

"So, Harry should ask them to come over for tea sooner rather than later," Sirius obviously concluded.

They each said their goodbyes then, promising they'd see him soon.

Harry nodded. He somehow could not find words to tell them what it meant to him, to see them all ranged there, on his side. Instead, he smiled, raised a hand in farewell, turned around and led the way out of the station towards the sunlit street, with Uncle Vernon, Aunt Petunia and Dudley hurrying along in his wake.

Harry gave one last broken sob as he brushed furiously at new tears still arriving. Sirius had never once been able to pick him up from the station, as any semblance for that promise of a home, a family, and now he never could; but that didn't mean he had to be alone.

HPHPHPHPHP

That last moment always felt a little hollow to me. I know what JK was going for, but it never goes anywhere, the Order never actually acts on these implied threats because the Dursley's were long since scared straight by the idea of Sirius. It's kind of nice they tried to keep this going, but Harry never even would have told them Sirius was dead so they never would have known the difference, the threats never carry through, and so I couldn't manage to make this book end any other way because the book itself ended so dang depressing to me.

With that being said-

I! Actually! Finished! My! Favorite! Book!

For real guys, I can hardly believe this is over! It has by far been the most dramatic, climactic, and emotional one yet, and not all just for the characters. Someone made the review, though I can no longer check, that it would be at the point of The Department of Mysteries that most authors would stop, and while I swore I wasn't going to do that, that's when the original copy got taken down. Points for irony fanfiction! I didn't stop though, I never shall, and honestly even in the following deaths of the last two books none will ever feel as powerful as this one did.

Thoughts on Order of the Phoenix:

I could honestly gush about this one for ages, but I'll try to keep it to a low roar. Hem, hem; The mystery is as overwhelmingly engaging as any predecessor, JK dropping that Department of Mysteries corridor and presenting it as just a dream for so long before it fully ties in never ceased to amaze me how she keeps managing to surprise me like that. The characters are just brilliant, they all feel so alive in even the smallest scene any one person is in, and has there ever been a worse villain created? There are those out there who sympathize and understand even Voldemort, but has there ever been a soul that didn't loath Umbridge worse than the main series villain? I don't even think the Dementors could handle her soul, not really, considering I'm not genuinely sure she had one. The twins had their own side plot and every time it was mentioned I start grinning like a crazy person, there has never been nor will there ever be such an epic leave from that castle. Every single chapter feels like a genuine combination of light hearted life and the shit about to hit the fan syndrome for the last book, and THAT ENDING! Gah, 14 years later and I'm still a mess over poor Sirius and Harry and Remus, sometimes I have to actually stop and realize I'm crying over fake characters because it's all so compelling and just real in the most important way; she made me care from the moment Sirius swore to Harry's face he'd never do a thing against his dead best friend, and then she killed him two books later! 10/10; Favorite book in the series, nothing beats the heavy weight that is Order of the Phoenix.

Instead of making you guys wait before I start posting six, I'll actually have a special surprise for you in the meantime, so you won't just have to go months without hearing from me, so look to my profile for that special little thing coming up in the meantime about November.

I would like to thank every single living, and the unliving if there are any of those who read, person who read this. Every review/favorite means oh so much to me! Thank you to all, and I bid you good day.