#richie jerimovich headcanon

[sageispunk]

thinking about how richie finds out ur a squirter....

warnings: 18+ minors dni, unprotected piv intercourse, mention of foreplay, richie likes when reader is loud and verbal, he's a damn tease, missionary, mention of overstimulation, begging, outercourse, Big D*ck Richard Jerimovich, mention of pubes, slight pain kink (scratching, pulling hair mentioned), praise praise praise, no specific age/gender/race mentioned, breeding kink, dirty talk, he talks u through it, mention of cumplay, just smth i wrote at 2am last night off the joint/penjamin combo ;)

he's fucking you sooooo good in missionary, tall body over you, almost cradling your body as he thrusts in and out and in and out

you've been dripping since y'all started (an hour ago--the man loves foreplay), but you can hear it now, the squishing and the squelching of him sliding in and out of your warmth, it's his own personal slice of heaven

he loves it, hearing everything-- your moans and breaths, your wetness, the slight creak of the bed as he fucks you into complete oblivion

you can barely talk, the only words exiting your mouth a combination of his name and unfinished curses

"richieee..." you crane your neck down, wanting to get a look at where your bodies met

"hmm?" he doesn't smirk but you can tell by the look in his eyes that he's proud of the way he has you, so fucking wet and needy, in his bed, on his sheets, so goddamn beautiful all spread out for him

wanting to see you fall apart just a little more, he thrusts into you one good time before pulling out, blushing at the whiny moans that immediately spill from your mouth

his hands are on your hips for a quick second before he pulls your body closer to him, leaving you more flat against the mattress

his hands travel to the backs of your knees, pushing them forward till you're folded in half underneath his slim build

the new angle gives you a better view of your glistening cunt, slightly swollen and throbbing with need and the next thing you know, both of you are watching in a silent haze as richie drags his throbbing cock up and down your folds

"please, richie, pleaseee..."

your eyes remain on his cock between your lips, the tip nudging your clit every time he moves his hips, teasing you nearly to death

"what's that, baby?"

you cry out as he taps your clit with his cock, your body jerking under him from the overstimulation

"fuuuuck, pleaseee..."

"what do you need, baby? hmm?"

his forehead is on yours, bright blue eyes shining down on you as the two of you hold that eye contact, his cock still resting on top of your clit, twitching ever so slightly

the only thing you can focus on at this point is his face, so close, right in front of yours-- his scruffy beard that you loved to feel against your face (and your thighs), his big, sharp nose that you loved feeling when he nuzzled into your neck at night, that furrow in his eyebrows that he always made when concentrating really hard on a sports game or a new recipe

and then finally his lips, when the magic words fall from them and into your ever-so inviting ears

"c'mon baby, let me hear you, i need to hear you say it.."

you don't want to hold back anymore, not with those big, blue puppy eyes staring down into your soul, so let it all spill from your lips

"please fuck me, richie, i need you, please, PLEASE, i need it, i want to feel you.."

his eyes flutter shut when he hears, and you could feel the way his cock twitches on you one second before he pulls his hips back, thrusting forward and sliding deeply inside of your cunt

"fuc-" your words are cut off as you find yourself overwhelmed with ecstasy at this new position

richie is in you, deeper than ever, you swear that you can feel him in your belly

he's pushing all your buttons, places you'd never even reached before, all whilst keeping his forehead on yours, eyes trained on your face for signs of what makes you feel good

one of your favorites, he notices, is when he rolls his hips slowly as he thrusts inside, his tip kissing a spot inside you that makes your eyes roll back into your head, while his curly pubes rub against your clit, creating the most torturing yet delicious friction you've experienced, ever

so he does that, over and over and over until you are gripping onto his shoulders, eyes watery and voice shaking, as you beg and beg, for what? who knows

his hips slam into yours, harder and harder as you feel yourself creeping up to your peak, your toes curling beside his head, and your fingernails digging into his shoulders

the pain was something both of you enjoyed, you loved to give a little pain to show how good your partner made you feel, and richie loved to recieve your scratches and your tugs at his hair because it showed him that he was doing his job and he was doing it damn well

your body tensed the closer you got, including your eyes, which clamped shut as you anticipated your upcoming eruption

he could tell it wasn't helping, you were focusing too hard on when it would hit you, that you just prolonged it even further

with two hands on your cheeks, he whispers above you-- "baby...fuck, baby, look at me, let me help you.."

although his pace doesn't let up, you allow your eyes to open up again, focusing in on the sight above you, your beautiful man staring down at you as he fucks your pussy like his life depends on it

"there y'go, mama, keep those pretty eyes on me, okay?"

you nod, using every bit of strength to keep your eyes open and focused on his as his cock slides in and out of your pussy, your muscles tightening around him, bringing him right up to that edge with you

"so fucking beautiful, baby, i swear t'god... if i could have you like this all day, every fuckin' day, i would... i would never leave this goddamn bed again.."

your pussy clenches around him at those words, and he hisses, teeth slightly bared as he tries to hold back his own release, wanting you to reach yours first

"cum for me, baby, you're so close, i can feel it, soooo fuckin' tight, it's like this pussy was made just f'me..."

a blinding white light hits your eyelids as your body begins to tremble underneath richie, your ears barely registering his words of encouragement for you

something you did recognize was a new feeling of warmth spilling down your inner thighs, down your folds, soaking the sheets below you

"oh, shit.." richie's eyes were no longer focused on your face, now they trained themselves on your cunt and how it gushed out again and again around his cock, pulsating as you came, hard

just a few moments later, richie empties himself deep inside you, filling you up with his warm seed, cock twitching with each spurt

"goddamn it, jesus.." his eyes close as he slows down, not wanting you to overstimulate either of you too much

you're still in another world, only slightly coming down from the high that richie and his cock supplied you mere minutes ago

richie stays inside you, laying kisses on your forehead, cheeks, jaw and lips as you stir back to consciousness

when your eyes open again, he's running his fingers along your scalp, nails lightly scratching and soothing you, like he always does

"when were you gonna tell me you're a squirter, huh?" a smirk graces his face this time and you grin in response, watching him sit back and pull out of your pussy, waiting for the moment that his cum begins to drip out of you (only for him to fuck it back inside with his long, skilled fingers)

[springtyme]

Hiii can we get some dating Richie headcanons :)

𝐃𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐑𝐢𝐜𝐡𝐢𝐞 𝐉𝐞𝐫𝐢𝐦𝐨𝐯𝐢𝐜𝐡 ♡

We certainly can! Thank you for the request, I love this disaster of a man so much! I had so much fun with this and I'm so excited for season two 💕 I also couldn't contain myself and made a Richie playlist

word count: 1.4k

Richie had almost given up on love before he met you. Almost.

After a series of failed dates and a couple of meaningless hookups it had seemed to him like love just wasn’t in the cards for him anymore. But then you had come along to prove him wrong. 

Despite how he might come off to some, Richie is definitely a lover boy. Putting himself ‘out there’ after his split with Tiff had been hard, but he knew that he deep down, in the essential core of his being, desperately craved to have someone to share his life with. 

Someone to come home to and share the little moments with. Someone to rant to about how Carmy had been acting like little bitch about the new dishtowels, or how another building downtown has been torn down to be turned into another fucking nightmarish cement parking house. Someone who he could have a laugh with and who would give him a chance to rise above the label of deadbeat loser that the universe seems to have put on him. Someone who could see him for who he truly is. Someone who wouldn’t judge him or think less of him for having sold a little coke from a back alley in a desperate situation. 

Richie will do anything for the people he cares for, so what if his methods are a little unorthodox? He is loyal to the bone and he cares, he fucking cares.      

And that is all he wants, someone to care for. Someone to love and someone to love him. That was all that he dreamed of before, but he had started to lose hope.

But then, when he finally had started to come to terms with the idea that that might never happen, he met you. 

It had all started with a slightly awkward date. He had been quite nervous, way more than he normally was. You just seemed too good to be true, way too good for someone like him anyway. He wanted to give off a good impression so bad that it slightly backfired, or it maybe would have backfired if you weren't you. 

He had been loud and acting confident in a way only a man who’s trying to hide how nervous he actually is can. He had been accidently laughing at his own jokes before the punchline had even landed and stumbling over his own words from time to time, but luckily for him you had found it rather charming. You couldn’t keep the wide smile from spreading on your face as he started rambling about Bill Murray and some old roman goddess. 

He had visibly relaxed after you had declared with a smile that you probably had to give him a call one of these days so you could hear the voicemail from the story, but that you certainly wouldn’t mind if he just happened to pick up the phone.   

He did pick up the phone when you called, and you were not disappointed in the slightest that it was Richie’s voice and not Bill Murray’s that had greeted you.

That first date turned into another, which turned into yet another one and no matter how scared he was that you would suddenly realize how much of a shitshow his life truly is he just didn’t seem to be able to scare you off.  

He’ll be your number one cheerleader, always so proud of you, and he will tell everybody who lets him about you. And he loves to show you off. You are in his opinion way out of his league and he is just so damn proud to have someone as amazing and beautiful as you to call his and to love.

He loves taking pictures of you. Just silly little pictures, you picking up produce at the farmers market or silly little selfies of the two of you as you wait in line at Arby's. He just wants to remember all the nice little moments with you.

He’ll proudly flaunt you on his instagram for all his 36 followers to see (well, 37 now that you follow him)

You will usually try and match your lunch break at work to fit with family at the restaurant. Stepping into the restaurant to be met with a huge smile from Richie is one of the highlights of your day. The staff of the beef are essentially family to him and he is so happy to share you with them. You have become part of that little family and it is more than Richie could ever have dreamt of.

Neither of you are in a rush with your relationship. He is a divorcee with a daughter and you have never had any wild dreams about a wedding or an on paper ‘picture perfect’ relationship with a house and a white picket fence. You just want someone who loves you for exactly who you are and that someone is Richie.

It is about a year into your relationship that you say ‘I love you’ the first time you don’t know if it is late or not but one thing for sure is that the love had been there from early on.

It was four months into your relationship that he had asked you if you would like to meet his daughter and honestly that had been a bigger confession of love than anything else could have been. He loves his daughter more than anything in the world and you know that he would never bring up introducing you to her if it wasn’t because he was serious about you and wanted you as a permanent part of his life.  

You had been a little nervous to meet her, you know how much she means to Richie and you had just really wanted her to like you. You had, however, not been the slightest bit nervous about how you would feel about her, she’s Richie’s little girl after all, a part of him, and you love every part of him. 

Luckily for you, she absolutely adores you, and you adore her. It had meant everything for Richie to know that his baby girl and you were getting along so well. 

It had been on that same night as you had uttered your first ‘I love you’s’ that he had asked you if you wanted to move in together. He had been so happy when you had kissed a ‘yes’ into his lips. 

Living together is everything Richie could ever have dreamt of. Not waking up to an empty bed and knowing that you are at home waiting on him when he comes home from work is like a dream come true.   

He is an early riser, usually you wake up to an empty bed, and even though you sometimes wish you woke up to warm, morning-cuddles it is always made up for by the sight of Richie in the kitchen. He is usually only wearing one of his, seemingly never ending supply of, ‘The Beef’ shirts and a pair of boxers.

His back will be turned to you as he’s in the midst of getting your coffee ready for you. It has become a fixture in your life with Richie, something you wouldn’t give up, even for all the morning-cuddles in the world.

You will sneak up on him and let your arms sneak around him, hugging him tight from behind and he will lean softly back into your embrace.

If he is having a smoke you will pluck the cigarette from his lips and take a few drags as you squish your cheek into his back and slowly let the comforting smell of brewing coffee wake you up. When the cigarette is smoked and ashed into the sink to later be thrown into the ashtray, Richie will turn around, engulfing you in his long, lean arms and press a gentle kiss to your forehead, kissing a ‘good morning’ into your still sleep-warm skin. 

Your relationship with Richie is warm and loving. It doesn’t mean that it is constant smooth sailing, but you always work through the bumps you come across along the road together. That is the true beauty of your relationship with him, the constant reassuring feeling of togetherness.

You are in his life to stay, you are family now and Richie will do anything to keep you happy and by his side.

[softly-sirius]

Would you love me if I was a worm? (gn)

Currently on Shift: Carmen, Richie, Sydney, Marcus, Fak, Sweeps, Tina, Luca

Carmen

“...What?”

Would check your temperature

Make you drink a whole glass of water and sit you on the sofa

When he’s confirmed that you are not ill or dehydrated he’d be concerned

Wonders all night if he isn’t showing you enough love

Brings you flowers the next day and gummy worms too 

Richie

“Fuck No!”

Asks if you would love him as a worm

When you say yes he calls you gross

Why’s he smiling though

Sydney

“I can’t kiss a worm though?”

She probably ate a worm as a kid on a dare once

Now cannot stand them

Hates the texture, but would try to get over it for you

Marcus

“Of course I’d love you, I’d take good care of you,”

Would make you a little home, 

Keep you in the nicest tank

Decorate it seasonally

Would take you on walks sitting on his shoulder

Would knit you a blanket :’)

Fak

“Fuck yes, can I be a worm too?”

He’s whipped,

As long as you two can be together? He’s down

Besides, the life of a worm, coiling himself around your matching worm body? 

Sounds pretty good to him

Sweeps

“What’s the scenario here?”

Asks you so many questions

Why you were turned into a worm?

When did you meet?

Is it a Princess and the Frog scenario?

Can he turn you back?

Comes up with a whole story of how he would save you from your worm curse

Tina

“What is wrong with you?

Will not even entertain the thought

Even if you ask again she’s not answering

Starts mumbling under her breath in Spanish

Not caring if you can understand her or not

Continues her prep to ignore you

Luca

“You’d be a cute worm”

Would kiss your forehead (kinda condescendingly)

You notice he’s avoiding the question

You open your mouth to ask him again

He puts a pastry in your mouth 

His distraction is a success this time

[groovyangelkisses]

need to be wearing richie's leather jacket and standing next to him in the alley while he smokes his ciggy and always makes sure to exhale the smoke over my head and never in my face & never lets me have a drag because "it's bad for you, are you fuckin' crazy, baby?"

[miredball]

sydcarmy meeting as kids au!!!

the berzatto kids help out at The Beef on the weekends. it’s fully a mom and pop operation. mikey’s there so naturally richie’s there too and they’re both teenagers and richie mans the counter all rowdy and loud but boyish and charming and old ladies love him

nat buzzes around donna eager to be useful but donna shoos her away or straight up just ignores her the whole day pretending not to notice nat tugging on her shirt saying please mom please

at the end of the day she sits on a stool at the counter mopey and sad but then richie asks her to count the register because he says he’s “fucking godawful” and she feels a little less useless after that

mikey being the oldest works in the kitchen. first he’s prepping vegetables or making the sauce and at some point their dad stops trying at all so he has to pick up the slack and starts to miss more and more classes to help out at the restaurant

one time he’s running out for school in the morning when he sees donna at the dining table sobbing into her palms saying no one wants to help her and she has no one and everything’s always on her on her on her (one person called out sick). mikey misses another big test and has to redo another year

CARMY! carmy is the shiny baby of the family that everyone teases will “make it out”. he doesn’t really know what it means but he sees how it makes his mother scoff and she’s always meaner to nat after

he loves being mikey’s little sidekick, always the one to get this and grab that and stir the sauce carmy don’t fuck up! he’s growing to be hungry for the noise and smell of the kitchen but he’s also little so uncle cicero ushers him out from the hot burners and sharp knives whenever he can

on the less busier hours of the day carmy draws or does homework at one of the tables. mostly he draws. he’s usually quiet but will share the rest of the seats when some customers ask are these seats taken?

mikey brings him in early one the morning and shows him how to braise meat. he does everything his big brother tells him to do and everything punctuates with a makes sense in his head and he’s little but he just gets it

carmy gets pulled into the line and next thing he knows he’s ten years old grabbing bread and butter and his beef and he’s got two wrapped sandwiches on a tray

richie tells him who it’s for and he brings the food out to a smiley dad and laughing daughter in their Sunday’s best

the girl has beads in her hair and they click and clack together when she turns her head to look at him when he says hello

he gives them their tray and stands next to richie behind the counter nervous and tries not to stare at the two people eating the food he made

he fails at the try-not-to-stare part but it’s okay because they get a bite in and the girl’s eyes widen, a little jokey to make her dad laugh but also a little real, and she’s nodding her head while she chews like she’s trying to process what she’s tasting and he hears her say “cool” and her dad asks “you like it?” and she says mmhm and takes another bite and carmy feels something full and bright growing in his chest

carmy grabs his sketchbook and color pencils under the register and draws an Italian beef sandwich over a checkered blue wrapper. he tries to remember everything mikey told him about braising beef and served au jus and writes it all down on the sides. at the end of it he tacks on the word “cool” and draws a cloud around it

[thefanficmonster]

Richie x reader relationship hcs pleaseeee

Certainly, darling! Hope you enjoy 💕

Pairing: Richie Jerimovich x Reader (Gender Neutral)

Warnings: Swearing, SPOILERS for The Bear

Genre: FLUFF, Humor

It takes a lot of patience having to put up with this man

Or it used to

He's put together now

He wears suits

And he can do way more than just respect

So you start way more than just tolerating him

By now that's all just semantics

All is null and void when you see how far your relationship has come

From barely being able to be in the same room without bickering

To being a couple head over heels for one another

His love language is quality time well spent and gifts given at random

Yours is acts of service and words of affirmation

The latter you've adapted due to his inherent need to be told what he pretends he already knows

That he's doing well, that he's doing enough

That he's an exceptional employee of The Bear, carrying on his best friend's legacy

That he's an amazing father whose daughter loves very much

Speaking of Eva

She had her reservations about you, but not for the reasons you may think

She's just got her dad's protective attitude and all thorns she exhibited toward you were all in favor of letting you know that if you hurt Richie...

You'll be reprimanded accordingly

But that too is history now

You and Eva have become inseparable

The three of you would sit around the dining room table, working on the homework Eva needed help with

Truthfully though, you'd spend most of the time doing nothing more than singing along to Taylor Swift songs

The singer's discography has become the official soundtrack to your and Richie's relationship

Her songs are blasting through the apartment and in the car practically 24/7

It took you so long to come to terms with the fact that you and Richie have so much in common

Now that you've accepted it, it's made you an unstoppable power couple

It's insane how you went from tolerance, to acceptance, to respect, to a crush in denial to a movie worthy love story

A very low budget rom-com at best

But still a movie none the less

[queer-whatchamacallit]

After several months of anticipation, I rewatched 1x05 “Sheridan”

Sydney tries to relive her mistakes over and over, so when she tries again, she feels like she won’t make any of them again. This is kinda similar to Carmy who relives his traumatic experiences, but tries to make the new situation healthier and one where he’s in control. They share this urge to surround themselves with what has hurt them

It’s pride month, so of course I have to mention Syd’s gay bedsheets and comforter <3

Syd did baseball! There’s a trophy on her desk.

The fact that Marcus watches shitty reality tv feels so right for him

Tina has been to a Berzatto family Christmas, and Carmy’s way of gaging whether she enjoyed it was whether his mom freaked out. Tina said “she wasn’t calm, but the food was great” and I don’t think I realized how much build up Donna got in s1

For just a couple scenes, Syd had a completely different scarf on? Not sure what’s up with that

Carm talking to Richie abt the coke is a good example of how he acts when he doesn’t have a task to do in addition to being stressed. He fidgets: grips the countertop, chews at the back of his lip, and paces, and he barely looks at Richie who’s sat right on front of him, mostly looking at the countertop or the ceiling. The only time he makes eye contact is when he wants to make sure he’s being heard

I think I’ve mentioned this in previous posts, but despite looking healthy and put together compared to the other Berzattos, Sugar still has her issues. She has the same temper they do, and considering Pete’s “you’re not pissed all the time” in 2x10, I think it definitely affects their marriage to some degree.

Nat’s complaints abt Carm are so true it’s funny like Yes! He really is a soft shitty bitch for being scared to talk to you because you try to make him face his problems! You’re so right, Nattie!!!

For as much as I talk about her flaws, I really do love her :]

It feels like there’s tomato cans everywhere this episode: on top of a shelf overlooking Marcus’ station, on the cinder blocks when they do the outdoor service, in the corner while Syd tells Carm about Sheridan. And funnily enough, I think they’re the big cans (blue top) instead of the small cans (green top)

I like to think Carmy picked up the words Rad and Gnarly from Michael because Mike would’ve grown up in the 80s and heard those terms a lot more, but you can’t tell me that Carmy wasn’t absolutely obsessed with tmnt as a kid

Also love Syd for absolutely rocking it when forced to think on her feet, she’s so smart and pretty wow <3

And the Carmy-Marcus mentorship strikes again! This time with Carmy’s deeply unhealthy outlook on his work!

I’m so obsessed with fire as symbolism for self-destruction in this show, never ever getting over his speech to Marcus. Also, he uses the pronoun “you” throughout it, implying that this is a completely normal healthy thought, and clearly when your restaurant’s on fire, of course, you’re going to want to let it burn to the ground, and that’s such a Carmy thing to think

When Carmy first comes in during that scene where he later helps Syd strain the stock, he’s holding onto the towels at his waist. He’s not moving them, he doesn’t take them off, he isn’t changing the position of his hands enough to actually be drying them, so there’s no other explanation! Bro is just stimming!!!

And I think that’s it! Waa I’ve missed doing these!

[reverse-space-cowgirl]

i feel like mikey and richie absolutely shared a girl or two on one of their nights out back in the day.

[ihavemanyhusbands]

Ok listen to me, *shaking you* LISTEN TO MEEEE!!!

I am being PLAGUED and TORMENTED today by the concept of Richie being your fuckbuddy/fwb 😭😫 so here, i have some headcanons for ya:

— Sneaking glances at each other throughout the day, trying to cover up secretive smiles and little touches in passing.

— Lowkey I like to think you two believe ur sooooo sly, but ofc everyone notices that you’re eye fucking each other lmaoooo

— Quickies in Carmy’s office, the alleyway, the walk in fridge, the bathroom, his car and other private nooks and crannies you’ve found.

— ^ bonus points if one of you needs to take your frustrations out on the other. You have a secret sign that means “I need you, NOW.”

— He knows how wet you get when he covers your mouth with one hand and growls “Don’t make a fucking sound” in your ear as he takes you <33

— Booty calls in the middle of the night, some of them even happening right before the two of you have to be at work at the Bear. The lack of sleep is sooooo worth it.

— more often than not you end up staying at each other’s apartments for more than one night.

— Walking in first whenever you carpool to work so you don’t raise suspicions.

— Phone sex whenever you can’t be together, and oh my god that man would have a prized collection of your nudes.

— ^ WAIT BUT HIM SENDING YOU PICS OR VIDEOS (WITH SOUND!!) OF THE MESS HE MADE AFTER TOUCHING HIMSELF TO YOUR NUDESSSSSS *rips hair out*

— Getting caught daydreaming about him rearranging your guts more than once…

— Despite the fact that you’re “casual”, we all know Richie’s a jealous guy. If there’s any new hire or a customer that’s getting a little too friendly, he always finds a way to guide them away from you.

[thatone-brightstar]

Heyyyy, been loving your stuff recently! After binging season 2 of ‘the bear’ I’ve noticed I absolutely NEED some platonic fluff with the Reader/OC(fox) and Richie where they just comfort him and tell him he’s worth being alive and he amounts to something because episode one was absolutely heartbreaking😭 and I need something to make me feel better for him, especially after all his great character development this seasonnn!!

Hi! I'm glad you like it!

I also only watched ep1 especially to write this because you are so right- not even five minutes in and they had me in tears with the analogy.

So here you go, for you, for me and anyone else that wanted to hug sad Richie through the screen.

PS. I haven't finished S2 yet so don't fret if it's a bit inaccurate.

**********

Purpose (Richie Jerimovich X Platonic Fem!Reader)

Words: 1.4k

(Part of -but not exclusive to- TB&TF universe)

‘Richie emergency. Need help’

Carmy’s text was pretty ambiguous yet sort of straight forward nonetheless. You expected a second one with a bit more context, but you knew with the whole renovation conundrum it was a miracle he even had the head to write the simple sentences in the first place. Plus, knowing the two for almost close to a year didn’t grant you any solace, because a Richie emergency could be either something small like a disagreement or more serious like having to bail someone out of jail. 

The memory doesn’t settle too well in your stomach and your strides grow quicker over the snow covered gravel that invades the space beside the restaurant.

The warmth engulfs you fully once you cross the back, scarf and beanie now unnecessary in the comfortable building. As you make your way to the office, you greet Manny and Angel with a soft pat on the back- so as to not distract them from their tasks- and unwrap the wool fabric from your neck, dropping it over the small bench by the lockers on your way in.

You can hear a soft conversation emanating from the small room, voices matching those of Carmy and Natalie once you’re close enough to the entrance to see them, and they you.

“Hey-” You greet with short breath, stepping into the room and planting a quick kiss on your boyfriend’s cheek, then leaning down to hug Natalie, who’s sitting on the squeaky old chair that just doesn’t seem to break yet. “I brought my mom’s first aid, what’s the emergency?”

“Why?” Carmy asks, confused.

“Well, you just said ‘emergency’ and I thought someone got stabbed again.” You respond confidently, raising the plastic case into view and shaking it lightly.

Carmy huffs out a small laugh while Nat’s expression is one of concern, mumbling a confused ‘again?’ under her breath.

“What? No- everyone’s limbs are good- I think-” He takes the kit from your hands and places it on the desk behind him. “Listen- Richie’s kinda not his usual self right now.”

“And that’s… bad.” You squint your eyes and tilt your head as you try to process his line of thought.

“I’m still debating it-” Nat kicks his foot softly at his answer, shooting him a look that you’d very much use with your younger brother too. “Okay- no but kinda. D’you think you can, like talk to him, maybe-please?”

A heavy sigh escapes as you cross your arms and lean back against the door frame, eyes flicking between the Berzattos. “What d’you even want me to say to him, it's Richie- he’s not the most open book here…”

“No, but you are pretty convincing-” Nat adds. “Something about the face…”

You scoff and shake your head.

“C’mon, babe please? He likes you… and you’re better at this sort of thing than us.”

You bite the inside of your lip in scrutiny for a few seconds, then uncross your arms and push yourself off. “Where is he?” In sync, their arms raise with a pointed finger in direction to the front of house and the slight smile playing over Nat’s face has you rolling your eyes. “There’s a hole on your wall- by the way.” You tell them, pointing loosely to your left, before disappearing again down the corridor.

Richie’s exactly where they said, behind the now empty counter, with small pieces of tape hanging from the tips of his fingers and eyes deeply concentrated on something on the bar. He looks up for a second when your shadow obscures his view and gives you a single nod. You place your forearms over the slightly dusty counter and rest your chin above your hands, trying to be as quiet as possible while he struggles to tape down the hole in the center of an old poster.

“It’s easier if you tape it from the back-” 

“I know how to fix a fuckin’ poster, alright?”

“-Okay” You say defensively.

“I know how to do things- I’m not some fuckin’ useless moron…” He says under his breath and the wounded expression that slips from the veil furrows your brows.

“No one said you were, Rich.”

“Good, cause I’m not.” His eyes flicker up again, expecting a taunting look on your face that didn’t correlate to your words, but found nothing more than your undivided attention. “What’re you doing here anyway? Kindergarten let you out early?” 

You’re shoulders shake with a short laugh and a thin smile pulls at his lip at your reaction.

“Just wanted to say hi, see how everyone’s doing…” You shrug, looking around the half packed room and to the newspaper covered windows that give the place a somber feel. “The place looks shitty...er.”

“Yeah- but your boyfriend’s got it all under control-” His tone is slightly irritated as he angrily pulls at the tape that’s beginning to stick to his skin. “Syd and Nat got it all under control- I don’t even know why I’m still here.”

“Cause we all need you here.” Richie’s eyes turn to you with a sheer hope that he tries to hide with a humorless scoff.

“For what? To be the butt of the joke?” He clears his throat and shakes his head, looking back down and picking mindlessly at the tape. “Nah, they don’t need me here. This is Carmy’s thing- like painting’s yours and all the gay- sorry, fruity- desserts are Marcus’ thing… I ain’t got a thing.” 

“Course you do.” You answer like it’s the most obvious thing in the world. “You know more about this place than any of us- Carmy included. Plus, who else is gonna keep him in check when he goes off on a tangent?”

“You.” He shrugs.

“But I’m not always gonna be here-”

“You’re breakin’ up again?”

“What? No-” You sigh and reach a hand to your hair, before remembering all the dust over your palm and putting it back down instead. “I meant… that these guys need someone to look out for them. Yeah, this-” You move your hand around the space. “is Carmy’s and Syd’s and Nat’s thing but, it’s also yours too.”

He keeps his gaze focused on his hands, but you can slightly see the tint starting to cover the edge of his baggy eyes. He’s quiet for a while, soaking up your words and letting them settle in his head beside the dark thoughts that you know a bit too well.

“Then what? What're they gonna do with me when they don’t need me anymore?” He speaks again with a hoarse voice, harshly sniffing back and raising his head to the ceiling. “They're the only family I got. Mickey’s gone- you took Carmy.” He points loosely to you and an amused blow leaves your nose. “This place… shithole n’ all, it’s all I got. And now it’s gonna be gone too. Where am I gonna fit in the new place?”

“It’s not gonna be gone if… you keep the memory with you.” You smile warmly up at the man and slowly reach out to press the tiny pieces of sticky plastic already popping off the poster. “And the guys are gonna be the talent, but the new place is still gonna need a soul.”

Richie nods slowly, brows creased as if not fully convinced. He opens his mouth but nothing comes out, doubting whether to ask.

“...I’m the soul, right?”

“You’re the soul.” You respond between laughs, with a shake of your head and Richie joins in timidly.

Your brows rise as your eyes land on the messy scribbling over an empty pizza box discarded beside you. You pull it closer in hopes that the writing will make more sense, but all you can make out is a few words and sums that are definitely not being added correctly.

“30k plus 50k equals 70k…who made these?” You ask Richie.

He leans down, eyes squinted and trying to read through. “I think those are Carmy’s chicken scratchings…”

You copy his stance and squint your own eyes in hopes to make out the words, then bite your lip to stop the small giggle when you read through the operations. Two or three sums are crossed out with another sitting beside it, underlined twice to confirm that it’s the correct one, though it’s just as wrong as the other two.

“Oh, my poor man…” You sigh in amusement and turn to his cousin. “See? Tangent.”

**********

[caiusmarciuscoriolanus]

Doomsday by Lizzie mcalpine except it’s Richie jerimovich a week after Mikey died trying not to be too full of hate for his best friend and all the shit he never told him and all the stuff Mikey left for them to figure out but also remembering the 2.5 seconds in junior year of high school where he thought “we could make it work, it would be okay, he’s not a girl but it could work” after Craig kishner shoved him face first into a lunch table and mikey punched Craig’s lights out and he got in so much trouble with Donna but all he could say is “he hit Richie”. He thought about it for 2.5 seconds. That’s all.

[sageispunk]

**18+ ONLY minors do not interact or you'll be blocked!!!

breeding kink! richie and his need to see you stuffed full of his cum nearly every night (and morning)... finding the best positions to fill you up after a few rounds of making you squirt and cream all over his face and his long, thick cock... his second favorite part (right after getting as deep as he could inside you and releasing his seed, images of you all round and swollen with his baby flashing through his mind as his cock twitched in your gushing cunt) was getting to watch his cum spill out of your pulsing hole. he'd watch it drip out down your folds, knowing that some of his seed was making its way even deeper inside you, possibly creating a beautiful new combination of the two of you.

then, richie would use his long, slim fingers to gather your mixed fluids, pushing them back inside you with a couple of slow pumps, teasing you a little as he notched his fingertips up to stimulate your g-spot, lavishing in the soft and needy moans you let out in response. the way you called him daddy over and over again as he guided your pleasure clouded his mind.

later, when the two of you are cuddling in fresh sheets, richie is gently fondling your breasts and teasing your pebbled nipples. you feel his cock growing against your back, causing you to squeeze your thighs together in search of some more friction. he pinches your right nipple, then your left, both times drawing a soft hiss out of you, your back arching and giving him more access to your body.

"fuck, i can't wait till these are all full and juicy for me, baby...you gonna let me taste your milk? hmm? i bet it'll be so fucking sweet, just like you..."

[springtyme]

Hi I was wondering if I could get your thoughts or maybe a short NSFW fic on how Richie would be during sex? He seems so sweet and thoughtful from season 2 so I’m thinking he’s a tender “making love” kinda guy but I’m not sure.

𝐍𝐒𝐅𝐖 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐑𝐢𝐜𝐡𝐢𝐞 𝐉𝐞𝐫𝐢𝐦𝐨𝐯𝐢𝐜𝐡 ♡

I’d love to share my thoughts! ♡ I fully support the idea that this man is a “making love” kinda guy (but he definitely also knows how to fuck) The Richie playlist

Richie Jerimovich x afab!reader (18+ mdni!)

word count: 1.k

This man loves sex. Not in a ‘likes to get his dick wet’ kind of way (not that there's anything wrong with that). He just really loves the act of having sex with you, the person he loves. He loves the intimacy it brings, the connection that is made through sex, the opportunity to melt together and feel utterly and completely engulfed with you. 

He is the type of guy where taking care of the people he loves comes as second nature to him, and that would most definitely include sex too. 

He loves to be able to give you pleasure. Whenever he feels insecure that he isn’t enough, or when he feels bad because he just doesn’t seem to be able to find the right words to express just how precious you are to him, and how much he truly loves you, he can at least show you, and make you feel just how devoted he is to you. 

And he definitely knows what he’s doing too.  

He is a man who’s had enough experience before you got together to know just how to work you to satisfaction. Yet he is always earger to jump at any opportunity he gets to learn.

He loves learning about what really makes you feel good, taking mental notes on how you react to certain movements, and what angles and positions that always seem to get you extra fired up.

He listens and is always ready for some constructive feedback (not that he'll need a lot but it is always nice to know that you can talk free and openly about your sexlife with a partner).

He has his own insecurities, sometimes he’s afraid that he isn’t good enough for you, you are so perfect in his eyes and he is definitely not. He's scared that he will disappoint you somehow in your relationship, but how he is in the bedroom is never an area that he’s that concerned about. That is one area where he feels fully secure in his ability as a partner.

He loves exploring every single part of your body. He doesn’t get to do so as often as he’d like, though (which in his perfect world would be everyday).

Your days are often busy. With your job, and the restaurant and everything, it usually doesn't leave you with a lot of free time together most days. He usually works till late and you usually have to go to work early. But when the two of you have time to spend he really takes advantage of it. He prefers to have you climax at least two or three times before he even thinks about coming himself.   

Shower sex is usually the solution for those busy days doing the work week. Either in the morning before you have to go to work or at night after he comes back home and need some stress relief after a hectic day at the restaurant.

But he prefers to have you in bed. 

When it comes to positions I think he is a little sappy. Missionary is, and will just always be, his favorite. He just loves being able to see your face as he fucks you. You riding him comes as a close second though. But he will always be down to switch things up whenever you feel like it. 

He would probably be really into the chairman too, he just loves how close it allows you to be to each other. He’ll sit at the edge of your bed, with you on his lap as he leaves open-mouthed kisses to your exposed throat as the back of your head rest against his shoulder, and your back is pressed into his chest. He’ll always make sure to sit in a spot that gives him a view of the two of you in the full-length mirror on your wardrobe doors. 

Seeing you bounce on his cock like this, while his fingers plays with your clit always has him go a little feral, and he’ll fuck up into you from beneath, meeting each of your bounces and have you scream out with pleasure.           

I imagine him having a bit of an oral fixation. Like he just loves having his mouth on you; gently nibbling your earlobe, leaving hickeys on your neck and collarbone, biting your lower lip as he kisses you silly, sucking your tits, you name it.  

Loves to kiss you through your orgasms. Like you’ll ride him and as your pussy clamps down on his dick as you come, he’ll gently guide your head down so he can kiss you and feel the vibrations of your moans on his lips as he fuck up into you while you milk his cock as the two of you come together. 

Loves going down on you. Like this man eats pussy for the thrill of it. If he can have you sprawled out on your back for him as his face is buried between your legs, or have you sitting on his face with your thighs squeezed around him then he’s a happy man. 

Anytime he’s with you he is a happy man though. 

And he is such a cuddler afterward. He’ll hug you close to his chest as he leaves soft kisses on your shoulder, your cheek, your forehead–everywhere he can reach really.

He loves to just lie naked with you in his arms, your warm soft skin against his as you both come down from your highs. Basking in the afterglow as the world around you pauses for a moment. 

And once he’s got his senses about him he’ll pamper you. Need a damp towel, or would you like for him to run you a warm bath? A glass of water? Maybe a snack? Whatever it is he’s got you. Even if you insist that you don’t need it he’ll get it for you. 

So, yeah... That was just a few of my thoughts on the topic lol.

I’ve always had a feeling that he’d be such a giving partner in both romantic and sexual situations and I feel season two just has confirmed that further.     

[softly-sirius]

The Staff Of The Bear Dating Vampire Gn! Reader Headcanons:

Currently on Shift: Carmen Berzatto, Richie Jerimovich & Sydney Adamu

Carmen

At first, thought it was kinda weird that you had a mini fridge with a padlock in your room

You told him it was where you kept your vintage jeans

 Which was a complete lie, so when Carmen told you he collected jeans too? 

Well, you had to spend a lot of time researching on the computer to cover that lie up

Will make you blood-infused recipes to show you he accepts you

Red velvet cake with blood instead of beetroot

Honestly, would eat it as well

Ends up getting a little obsessed with making stuff the perfect texture

Asks you loads of questions about blood

What do you like about it? Do different types taste different? How do you like it prepared?

He wants to know everything about your preferences so he can make everything perfect

I think Carmy's vampire partner would struggle the most with being a vampire and not a human 

So eating the food Carmen makes you will make you tear up sometimes because it reminds you so much of being human

Kinda wants you to bite him, but also kinda does not

So So Nervous about it, but you never bring it up

You can hear his pulse racing when he’s stressed so you always know when he needs help

You’ll kiss his pulse point when you notice him stressing out

He washes his hands a million times when he’s back from work in case of garlic

Before he knew the secret he once brought you some garlic bread 

Your nose burnt for a week, your throat even longer

You couldn't bring yourself not to eat it when he gave you those eyes

Carmen has sunscreen for you in summer and insists on it even if it does nothing

The hot summer in Chicago just makes you extra exhausted and sluggish so you need to feed more

He knows when you’re slacking on your feeding and will make you blood puddings (now with real blood)

When he does pluck up his courage and ask about biting he finds out he kinda likes it

Loves it when your teeth scrape his most sensitive areas

He really likes it when you bite at the pudge of his stomach, though it isn’t the best spot for you to feed from

But your bites are more love bites than actually feeding from him

Overall, he is not as chill as Richie would be with a vampire partner, but that's because he isn’t chill about anything

He’s just happy someone likes him :’)

Richie

“You’re a vampire? My baby’s a vampire?”

He would love you to bite him, wants to see your teeth marks all over him

Was jealous for a while wondering where you were getting blood from

 Who were you biting? Did they taste better than him? 

He was not having that

Read that papayas make blood taste better so he starts eating them all the time

Starts taking iron tablets in case that tangy taste is what gets you going

‘Accidentally’ cuts himself in the kitchen to see your reaction. 

It’s minimal 

Eventually, he just gives in and is like, 

“Why have you not drunk from me yet?”

Moans when you bite him, it’s probs made him nut let's be real

Loves to have your bite marks all over him, on his thighs, his chest, his arms

Wants you to feed from him until he goes dizzy and can’t stand

Loses his mind when his blood drips from your lips and you stare at him all predatory

Turns red when you tell him how good he tastes

Enjoys being taken care of afterwards

Makes you watch Blade a million times

Calls himself your toyboy (even if you’re not that old a vampire or younger than him)

Whenever he sees bats he’ll tell you he saw one of your friends

Talks to the bats sometimes

Keeps blood in a wine bottle for you at the restaurant and loves to pour it for you and take care of you when you visit

Loves to cuddle up to you in summer because your body is nice and cold

The most interested in your ‘powers’ and asks you a million questions

“You or Godzilla, who would win?”

“Wait, so when you kept asking me to open all those jars?”

So smug when he realised how often you acted helpless just to get his help

Arm wrestles you all the time

Thinks if he catches you off guard he might win (Sometimes you let him)

He’s a loser, but he’s your tasty loser 

Sydney

Laughs when she finds out and thinks it’s a joke

Probably bails on you for a little while

But then ends up coming back like…

"I didn’t think i could be ok with it, but I would rather be with you than without you"

Is grossed out by it, so you drink blood in private

She does not want to be bitten

Is the least chill with it, but she loves you so she deals

Will feel for your fangs every time you kiss, but you keep them hidden away

She gets mad at you when you go out when it’s really sunny

Keeps shades and an extra hat in her bag because sometimes you just turn up

She’ll be waking around the city and you just appear and ask to hang out

She thinks it’s a kind of power

She just forgot she added you on Find My Friends

Then she realises she can use your powers for her gain

Uses you when shopping second-hand to check if stuff is real silver

Buys you a gothic ring with a bat on it mostly as a joke

But you wear it all the time, it melts her little heart

Loves,when you turn into a little bat, especially if you look like a fruit bat

She’ll cradle you against her chest and stroke your head with her fingers

Will carry you around in her bag all day if you want to

She doesn’t call you her vampire but thinks of you as her bat 

Thinks it’s pretty funny when you go as a vampire for Halloween every year

Especially when a drunk Richie starts complimenting how real your fangs are and pokes his fingers in your mouth

Is definitely not jealous that when Tina cut her finger during prep you had to step out of the room

Especially not when she sees the empty iron pouches in the trash

She knows they tide you over in emergencies till you can drink blood

Maybe she wants you to drink from her a little bit 

Perhaps you’ll get to taste her one day after all, just as a little treat

[currymanganese]

I am blessed to be sheltered enough that Mikey and Richie talking Claire up to Carmy is easily one of the more oafish conversations I've heard in my short life, not the most oafish mind you, that distinction belongs to some real men I've heard, but damn! It's certainly up there...I'm captioning that scene for one of my Sydcarmy edits that's up on YouTube right now and the secondhand embarrassment crazy. 🥴

[babybirbb]

having carmrichie in therapy thoughts

both of them realizing being together isn’t going to magically fix everything, but also seeing this as a push to want to get better

richie definitely went before carmy and eventually decided to finally drag carmy in for his own sessions

at some point carmy and richie in couples/duo/family therapy

having their shouting matches in there with some breakthroughs that leads to physical assurance (hand on shoulder, arm, thigh, or hand-holding)

sometimes they’re in there unable to look at each other

them leaving the restaurant together to go to the appointments, no one really questions it and accepts the calm that’s bestowed the two, despite their curiosity

them changing, growing, healing but, as hard as it is, most importantly they’re doing it together