#ross and rachel are so boring

[maraczeks]

friends s4 thread pt 1

[iouinotes]

Show-off | Mike Ross

pairing: Mike Ross x female!reader

show: Suits

genre: smut word count: 2,9k

summary: you and your co-worker Mike dont get along very well. But when you have something that he needs, suddenly everything is different.

a/n: Just watched the first two episodes of "Suits" and something about Mike is really attractive-

Working in a well-known office as a lawyer has it's advantages. Such as being respected by business people or being able to afford a lot of things, you spend all your evenings analyzing documents rather than meeting actual people.

Nevertheless, sometimes there are also negative factors. For example, my co-worker Mike, who really believes, that he is with his ridiculously skinny tie and sarcastic humor better than the others. Or right now, better than me.

"God, I cant believe you. Can you behave for once?" I use my fingers to push my hair back in frustration, noticing how my head starts to hurt. Its 10 pm and I'm currently trying to stay calm, though because of one man in particular, my nerves seem to be getting thinner within seconds. Valuable time is wasted that I could spend somewhere else instead of with him.

"Now it's my fault, that you don't have the documents with you? Sorry, I can't help you being organized in your own workplace." His voice irritates me. Everything about him is so frustrating.

"I told you, I didnt get the message! How am I supposed to know, that you need something, when you don't tell me anything about it? Maybe you should stop being so childish and ask me in the first place, instead of running to Rachel!" If our job had nothing to do with justice and we werent literally standing in a law company right now, I would kill him. And then I wouldn't hesitate to go to court and say it was self-defense, because I didnt want to hear any of his miserable excuses anymore.

"So what do you think, I should do? I need these documents for tomorrow. Please, I know you don't like me, but it is really urgent." Why does he has such blue eyes? The look he is going me is even more irritating than his voice.

I sign, exhibit my laptop and try to put the pens back, that are laying all over my desk.

"Okay, fine. As I said, the documents are at home, so-" I don´t even get to finish my sentence.

"Great, so I'll meet you there. And I wont even tell anyone, if your place is a mess." His eyes wander over my messy desk, and even If I don´t like to admit it, it's a bad habit of mine. But, he shouldn't make any assumptions about the neatness in my apartment.

"I hope you loose the documents on your way home." At my words, he grins smugly.

"Well, then I could lie and say you didnt found them anymore and I hadnt had the chance to go through them." He leans towards me.

"I'll run you over with my car." He raises his eyebrows at my threat.

"You sure should do something that makes you smile more often. Is that even something you know how to do?" I show him my middle finger and turn to left my office. When I close the door, I hear the laughter in his voice.

"The next storm should be named after you as quickly as you left the room." He follows after me.

"Can you shut up for once? Oh, I forgot. You don´t last one second being silent. Thats a shame, the world could finally heal." His hand rests on his heart, his features fake a hurt expression.

"Ouch. You really don´t like me that much, huh?" His eyes try to search mine.

"You get on my nerves on purpose every fucking day. Should I thank you for that?" I turn my head to look at him.

"Yes, you should. Your life would be so boring without me." He grins at me again from the side, that typical grimace that is always adorn on his face.

"You wish." When I tell him my address, he raises his eyebrows, but before he can make an unfavorable comment, I get into my car.

Darkness surrounds me and when I see him going away, I lower my head to the steering wheel. He really is the best at confusing my emotions.

~~~~~

I turn off the lights of my car and get out of it, so I can finally make my way to my flat. Its not something special, I mean I have a living room, which is quite big and connected to the kitchen, a bedroom and a bath. But I am very lucky, because I have a small balcony, from which I can watch the stars at night. But I usually only do that when I can't sleep.

So, when I enter my apartment, I let my eyes wander over the manageable mess, I put some clothes back in the closet and the dishes in the washing machine. The place almost looks decent, when I hear the doorbell.

As I open the door, I'm nervous for some reason. I let him in and turn to my office drawers, looking for the document.

"Nice place. You live here alone?" His fingers trace my bookshelf, I see him reading the titles.

"No, my wife is still at work." When I look at him dead serious, I see him laugh in surprise.

"So, you do have humor. I thought, you were one of those exceptions that wouldn't be able to do that." He means it as a joke, but something in my chest hurts.

When I reply with a monotonous voice, I see his eyebrows pull together. "I live here alone. That's what you wanted to hear?" I'm getting more frustrated again with every second he's around me.

"No- I didnt mean it that way. I'm sorry. My intentions were good, I promise." When I look at him for a moment, I see his honest expression.

It would be so easier for me to hate him, if I didnt know, he was a good human. Well, most of the time.

We are silent for a moment, but when I hear his footsteps, I tense up.

"What are you doing?" He's now standing right next to me.

"Helping you. You seem a little, tense?" I glare at him for a moment and he raises his hands in defense.

"Just pointed out the obvious. But dont worry. You still look lovely." I stop in my movements at his words.

"Thats such shock for you?" His voice shows surprise and a certain curiosity.

"Only that you say it." I look into his eyes.

"Well, you may think I'm dumb, but I'm not blind."

He just called me beautiful, sort of. It´s confusing me.

When I finally find the documents, I hold my hand out to him.

"I don´t think you are dumb. I think you're annoying. And a show-off. I don´t like that." His eyes follow me.

"What do you like then?" His question surprises me. He slowly takes the documents out of my hand, his finger gently brushing mine.

"I don´t think that is any of your business." I try to clear my voice. His touch makes me shiver.

"Come on, tell me. Would that be so bad?" His whole presence is making me nervous and I feel my hands start to shake.

At work, I can always hide behind a mask, pretend that nothing he does affects me. I can act like I truly hate him, even though I catch myself looking at him, from time to time. Especially when he shows off his intelligence without realizing it, impresses his clients and -I would never admit it- me too. It's a certain charm about him, the way he always knows how to answer, while being mischievous and clever about it.

But now, that he's in my apartment and so close to me, it's suddenly different. And I don't know how to react to him being nice.

"I look for someone who isnt afraid of commitment. Someone who is honest and kind, but who also challenges me. I want to feel safe, so I can put my trust not only in myself."

He nods and is quiet for a moment, I begin to feel stupid for telling him all of that, when he responds.

"I get that. Someone whose shoulder you can lean on when things get too much. Someone who meets your needs, who wants to be in your life. For longer than a one-night stand." He smiles at me and I see for the first time, why I possibly could like him.

"Also, statistics show higher rates of being robbed or kidnapped, when you have one-night stands." This remark almost makes me laugh, even though it's frightening.

"Well, who would even notice, if I would disappear? Probably only my clients, because they need me." I lower my head, being completely honest with him for the first time.

"I would notice."

When I look at him, he takes a step towards me. His fingers gently slide over my shoulder and brush my hair aside, the touch makes a warm feeling bloom in my chest.

"I couldn't annoy you anymore. My life would be pretty boring without you. And it's not so bad to be able to look at such a pretty face every day, even if it always looks at me annoyed, like all the time." I quietly laugh at that, feeling surprisingly good because of his compliment.

We look at each other, now being really close. My eyes travel to his lips and I don´t even know how it happens, but suddenly he is all over me. His lips on mine, his hands on my waist, lifting me up to sit me on the desk. I moan softly when his hands tangle in my hair and he pushes himself closer to me, so that he's standing between my legs. One of his hands gently wraps around my neck and I feel my loud pulse.

My hands move too, stroking his back and holding him closer to me by his tie. As he pulls his lips away from me, he lifts my chin with his finger. Now, looking down at me with widen pupils. I hold his eye contact, forgetting all about my issues with him, when he speaks to me with a deep voice (which I suddenly don´t think sounds irritating anymore).

"Be angry at me tomorrow and mine for tonight. I bet, all your frustration from work and your thin nerves can catch a break, what do you say?"

Not much. Because I pull him towards me by his tie and kiss him again. I don't want to stop at all anymore. He returns the kiss with the same enthusiasm and his hands find their way to my waist again to lift me up again. When he crosses the living room with quick steps and lays me down on the sofa, I already feel out of breath and clearly turned on.

His kisses become more intense, his lips move from my mouth to my neck, leaving marks there. But it feels too good to make him stop.

"I will gladly hear your excuses, when someone asks you about your hickeys tomorrow. Because you will be all flustered, when you think again about this moment. Where you are ready to be fucked by your colleague, who you despise so much." I whimper as he pushes up my dress and his hands pull my tights down to my knees. The cold air hits my skin, but I don't really notice it, because his lips are on my neck again and his fingers connect first with my stomach and then further down. I hold my breath as his lips touch my ear and his fingers stroke my folds.

"So wet for me. Didnt think, I would turn you on this much." I kiss him to shut him up.

"You are-" I moan, when he finally puts a finger in me. "-so annoying." He laughs at me.

"Am I? But you seem to like it." I feel myself getting wetter, his fingers feel so good as they move gently but firmly inside me. One of his hands moves to push my dress further up and somehow, he manages to pull it over my head. Now, I'm lying in front of him in just a bra, his hands slowly find their way over my body and to my back, which I lift slightly so that he can open the clasp.

When I lie naked in front of him and he massages my breasts, his lips touch mine and his fingers stimulate me, I feel like I'm in heaven.

He breaks apart, so he can look at me and I draw my eyebrows together, when his fingers increase in speed. My mouth opens and the sounds that escape me echo in the apartment.

"I'm- god, I think I am going to come-" at that he starts to tease me, going slower but a lot deeper. My eyes almost roll back as he hits a certain spot inside me.

"That feels good? What do you say, when you want something?" You stupid idiot.

"You stupid-" I begin to say as his lips graze my nipple and his finger scissor and stretch me out further.

"One word, darling. Say it." And because I feel this knot inside me (and maybe this side of him turns me on, like a lot), I finally open my mouth to please him.

"Please, Mike. I-I need to-" My sentence is cut off as his fingers speed up and I moan loudly.

"Thats a good girl, you can be so good to me, if I make you." His lips search mine as I finally come. My breathing is heavy and when I come down from my high and look at his face, I see the satisfied expression.

"You are done-" I can't maintain my strict facial expression and suddenly have to start smiling. His eyes widen in surprise and I raise my eyebrows, still smiling softly.

"What?" I quietly laugh at his expression.

"Nothing, its just- I have never seen you smiling so happy." I roll my eyes gently. As I look at him closer now, I see the bulge in his pants and the loosened tie. As I lean forward, his eyes shift to my body.

"You still are fully clothed. A bit unfair, don't you think?" I watch him swallow and my hands move to his chest to slowly unbutton his shirt. As I also remove the tie and slip the shirt from his shoulders, I sit myself on his lap. Rocking my hips forward and seeing his eyes close. His hands move to my hips and begin to control the movements, my eyes close too and my head leans into the crook of his neck as the movements become faster.

Sighs and heavy breaths leave his lips and once again, one of his hands moves to grab my breasts, lightly grazing the nipples.

I look at him, noticing his swollen lips and his flushed cheeks. His hair is a mess and his forehead is furrowed, but he tries his best to pull himself together.

I groan as I look at him and suddenly think back to todays afternoon, when he was on a phone call and I heard how he listed one reciting fact after another, without any difficulty.

"What are you thinking about?" His voice pulls me out of my thoughts.

"N-nothing" I'm definitely too embarrassed to admit how much his intelligence and the way he seems to know everything, turns me on.

One of his hands moves to my entrance and teases me by just circling around it. When I try to push myself down, he pulls his fingers away.

"You tell me, whats going on in that pretty head of yours and you'll get me." My body feels so hot, I can't think properly anymore.

"You where on a phone call today and you just- you listed without any effort every single point that will help you win the case. You just said it like- it's nothing."

When his fingers dig into me again, I bite my lips. I try to control my moans and not pay attention to the fact, that I just gave him every opportunity to make him be more complacent than his usual self.

His fingers pump into me and I feel slightly overstimulated. But I wouldnt want to stop now.

"You get off by the thought of me, saying memorized facts? Who would have thought that my intelligence would turn you on so much." God, his ego probably doesn't fit in this apartment anymore.

"Don't think too highly of yourself, you still annoy me." Now I'm really just trying to get myself out of the situation. I lean towards him, so he can't say anything anymore and pull on his blonde hair to distract him.

Moans escape my lips and when I notice that his noises are also getting louder, I pull away from him. He looks at me confused.

"I want you inside me." Thats all I say, but he quickly complies with my request. I slide off his lap and wait for him to take off his pants and boxers until he's finally on top of me again. His fingers find my bottom lip and while maintaining eye contact, I open my mouth so he can insert a finger. My tongue brushes against his and after a few moments of him pressing on my tongue, he lets his fingers move back to the spot that needs him the most.

He stretches me for a few minutes until he finally guides his cock to my hole and slowly penetrates me. My eyes close and I hear his breath in my ear as he pushes further.

"You are so tight- good thing finally someone fucks you." I nod without thinking and hear his laughter in my ear.

"You think so too, huh. Would you let anyone fuck you then?" My stomach tenses, I feel the pleasure growing again and every movement of him. This feels so good-

I try to shake my head, but I'm too lost in the sensations to pay much attention to his words.

"No? But I thought, you hate me. Why would you let me fuck you, if you don´t even like me?" His thrusts become faster and more uncontrolled, I feel him getting closer to his own high.

"I-" I try to stutter "d-don´t hate you." I feel myself getting closer and reach into his hair, pulling at the roots and feeling his lips on my shoulder. His thrusts become more powerful and as he moves his hand and massages my clitoris, suddenly everything goes white in front of my eyes and I come.

I feel every inch inside of me, feel his fingers brush over the visible bulge in my stomach and think to myself: god I feel so full

When he comes too, I moan so loudly that it's impossible that my neighbors didn't hear me. His hand finds its way around my chin, he slides a finger into my mouth and I feel my vagina tighten because of it.

He hisses and his thrusts slow down until he finally pulls out of me, trying not to fall on top of me. As I give him some space next to me, he falls halfway on me, but pulls me on top of him in the next second and I can hear his strong heartbeat. With his outstretched hand he pulls the blanket over me, that had fallen to the floor.

We both try to catch our breath and as the minutes pass, only the wind outside is heard. He is the first to break the silence.

"So, you don't hate me?" I lift my head from his naked chest to look at him.

"Only sometimes." He shakes his head and smiles, gently stroking my back.

The evening went by quickly, we ordered a pizza and ate it (clothed) on the terrace. We were going over his documents for tomorrow, I blushed at the thought that this was the real reason he came here, but he just hugged me from behind after we finished and continued watching the stars.

It's not really clear what this evening means for us, but I don´t want to get into that, not yet. Because I'm not sure what it means anyway.

Because now, I have to get used to the fact that his voice no longer irritates me, that his jokes no longer annoy me and that he as a person, is actually not as bad as I imagined.

"Who thought, I was the one to get you relax."

But he is still a show-off.

[creedslove]

THE ONE WHERE PEDRO BREAKS YOUR HEART

Pedro Pascal x f!reader

✨ This is loosely based on Friends season 5, when Emily tells Ross he can't see Rachel anymore ✨

Summary: You were his friend, then you were his girlfriend until you were only his friend again. His current girlfriend isn't happy with your friendship and gives Pedro an ultimatum: he can't see you anymore

Warnings: age gap, friends to lovers, breakup, lovers to friends, sort of unrequited love, asshole!Pedro, angst, hurt, plot inspired by Ross x Rachel (friends) and a little bit of Monica x Richard (if you squint)

A/N: I had a major anxiety attack today just like I hadn't had in months and I was feeling really bad and really sad, so angst ideas started popping in my mind and I thought of writing something like that to help me organize my feelings when this memory of friends came back and I knew I had to do it ❤️

2.7k words

"Are you out of your fucking mind, Pedro?" Ariela placed her hands on her waist and stared at her boyfriend after she dragged him to the restaurant restroom for a private conversation, which turned into an argument.

Pedro shook his head and ran his hand through his hair, sighing as he thought of his words carefully, he didn't know what exactly to tell her. He knew his girlfriend might be angry, but if she could invite her own girl friends to a trip he was paying for, he figured he was allowed to invite you as well, after all, you were his friend. The one he loved the most, at least.

"What's so bad about it? You got your friends here, so you wouldn't be bored, because apparently you cannot spend more than a day alone with me without dying…" Ariela rolled her eyes

"Don't turn this against me! You were the one who invited that girl, she isn't just your friend, she's your ex… for God's sake, you hug too much, you hold hands, you touch her leg… Pedro, when she got here you nearly greeted her with a peck on the lips! Don't you realize how fucked up this is?" Ariela said angrily, she'd talked to him about this weird relationship with you a couple of times but Pedro never took a decision. He wasn't your boyfriend anymore but he couldn't stop himself from acting like it once you two were together.

Ariela also hated you, she hated you because you had broken up with him, and yet, you were also incapable of moving on, you had always claimed you and Pedro had friends in common, but Ariela thought it was ironic how every time she saw you and Pedro together, none of your other friends were around.

Ariela also hated you because she felt threatened by you, the bond you shared with Pedro was too strong, you two finished each other's sentences, got along and agreed all the time.

It made her blood boil, because no matter how much she tried being that for Pedro as well, she couldn't.

But then, the tension began dissolving. As much as you and Pedro had the special bond, Ariel appealed to the weapon she had against you: sex.

You weren't having sex with Pedro, not after you two broke up, but she was and she gave him a lot of it. Their relationship was more sexual than anything else, but it was enough to keep him with her for several months. And then she began feeling comfortable, thinking she was finally being able to compete with you.

But having Pedro inviting you to meet him in Malta was too much.

Ariela saw how Pedro seemed nervous at her enquiry

"Fine, what do you want me to do? What do I have to do to please you and prove to you Y/N and I have nothing going on?"

Ariela paced the small place. She hated the fact she had to lock herself in a restroom to talk with her nonsense boyfriend when she could be spending his very few days off.

"You can't see Y/N anymore, Pedro. It's enough. Your connection should have ended when you two broke up, well, when she broke up with you…" Ariela chuckled softly, knowing it still brought a sting of pain to his chest.

"What? I can't do this, Ariela… Y/N is important to me, she's my friend, we've been friends longer than I've known you…"

"Yeah? Well Pedro, so it's you call, but you gotta man up and make up your mind, it's either me or her…" the woman folded her arms and stared at him "besides, remember she was the one who broke up with you, she didn't want you, she didn't love you anymore. She thought you weren't good enough just because she wanted to play barbie doll house with you, she wanted to trap you with a wedding ring and a baby…" she smirked

"Don't say that! It's not exactly how it went… there was more to it"

"Was it there, Pedro? Really? Am I lying or did you tell me all that yourself?"

Ariela saw his defeated expression as he looked down in shame. His girlfriend was right, as much as he wanted to defend you and pretend it didn't happen, she was right.

"Fine, what am I supposed to do? Tell her to get on a plane and get the fuck out of my life?"

"Exactly, amor. That's exactly what I want you to do" Ariela smirked and leaned in, kissing his lips and dragging him to one of the stalls so they could at least enjoy a little and not waste all the time they had.

You battled yourself as you didn't know if going to the restroom at that moment was appropriate or not, you felt it was kind of weird to leave the table just a few moments after Pedro and his girlfriend did. You knew she hated you and as much as you thought hatred was a strong feeling… yeah, you hated her too.

And her friends, you weren't so sure. Sometimes you thought they were alright and sometimes it seemed they came straight out of a teen movie where they played the mean girls who followed their leader - Ariela - and that was unnerving. You were too old to play that game, and you thought of Pedro, if you felt fed up with that, you could imagine him. He was funny and outgoing and he certainly behaved like a child sometimes, but he wasn't one to appreciate mean comments about people, or about their appearance and other things those insufferable girls often did. You just couldn't understand why Pedro could be with someone like her.

It sounded suspicious to say that, but he was a better person than she was, and you knew he deserved someone better. Someone that couldn't be you, just as your someone couldn't be him, you were just incompatible in what you two envisioned in your relationship, in what you two wanted for the future.

But it had nothing to do with how you felt for each other, because God knew how much you still loved him. You weren't so sure about his feelings concerning you though. Sometimes you were he still loved you, and sometimes you were sure he was already over you.

You bit your lips as you couldn't hold it anymore, you desperately needed to pee and it had to be at that moment, so you excused yourself, earning just a eyebrow raise from the girls and went to the restroom.

You hadn't even thought of how long they were taking in the restroom, it was indeed quite odd, and your heart fell on the pit of your stomach as you thought they were probably having a quickie. You hated how territorial Ariela was over Pedro, especially when you were around. He had always been discreet, until she came along, now every time you watched them together, hands were all over, her lips were on his neck and you would be lying if you said it didn't make you burn with anger and jealousy.

You were about to enter when you heard Pedro's voice saying your name, and then you stopped dead on tracks, your heart racing as he continued whatever he was saying. Eavesdropping was wrong, but you didn't care at all, Pedro was talking about you, and you wanted to know what it was about. You felt an excitement, maybe he was on the phone with someone, talking about you, you liked daydreaming about that. Even if it wasn't right, even if you were the one who had broken things up, you still got carried away by your feelings, their intensity was too much at times and it made you even act foolish. It wasn't polite, you leaned against the door as much as possible, hearing every single word you could catch about his conversation.

He was indeed talking about you, but he was talking about you with his girlfriend, and you felt your heart shattering into a million pieces when you understood what their conversation was about.

Your eyes burned with tears as you heard their words. How she demanded him to stop seeing you, using your breakup as a way to manipulate him, but you knew Pedro better than that, he was going to say no, he was going to stand up for himself and defend you, because that was who he was. He was a nice person, he loved you, even if it was just as a friend, you two had had a long relationship and you always supported each other, he wouldn't just give all that up because of a woman he'd been dating for less than a year.

You felt like bursting into the bathroom, telling her everything you thought about that devious woman, you wanted to remind Pedro how much he meant to you and how much you thought you meant to him, but it was no use, he'd made up his mind, as much as you didn't want to believe he would do it.

A feeling of embarrassment took over you. You felt like an intruder, someone who only bothered the sweet couple and the cute friends and before you could hear Pedro's moans coming from the bathroom stall, you walked back to the table, the girls looked at you with a smirk

"Did you walk on Pedro and Ariela fucking?" They burst out laughing and one of them got her phone, writing something down, while the other girl's phone buzzed.

You felt your blood boiling, they were texting about you while you stood right there, just like mean teenagers. You grabbed your bag and walked out of that place, not giving them a final glance.

You place your sunglasses back on, as it was a sunny day, but they were too dark as your vision was blurry with tears. The pain you felt in your chest was so intense and yet you took your phone and decided to text Pedro, letting him know you were back at the hotel while coming up with some excuse about a migraine; it would be just awkward and uncomfortable to hang out with them as if nothing had happened.

As Pedro finished with his girlfriend and the two of them walked back to the table as if nothing had happened, he immediately frowned to see you were missing, he had no idea where you went, but it felt weird to him.

He still hadn't made up his mind completely, on one hand he never wanted to be away from you. You were just a part of him, you two shared everything and it was just special. However, on the other hand, Ariela did have a point. The two of you were too close and she was right when she said it was uncomfortable for her to see your interaction. He knew he would feel the same if he saw his girlfriend being so familiar with a friend, and she also hit on a very delicate matter to him: how you broke up.

Pedro was always the one to end his relationships, usually because he grew bored after some time or because he fell out of love just as fast as he fell in love with that person in the first place. Commitment wasn't really his cup of tea, but he was kind of accepting the idea as you two evolved from a friendship to a relationship. He loved you, and he also loved being around you. He grew to love the cheesy cliches a relationship often brings, he enjoyed having to exchange gifts on Valentine's day, or have a date night with you every few weeks. Even the nerve-wracking experience of meeting your family - he was afraid of your dad, but he should've been afraid of your mom, because he was sure she hated him - he enjoyed it.

So it came as a shock when you gave him the talk. You'd told him you couldn't try to change him, but you wouldn't change for him either. His career was important to him and you would respect that, but a sense of future was important to you too, you wanted an assurance you would move in together with someone, get married to that person, have a dog or a cat or even both and maybe in the distant future, you would like to have a child. Needless to say, that person wasn't Pedro.

It hurt him because he knew it wasn't just his commitment issues, it was everything: his career, his hectic life, the media harassing him wherever he went and also his age. If you wanted to wait ten years to have a kid, you'd still have plenty of youth left, but if he did the same? Pedro didn't even like considering that.

He sat back at the table and looked around, thinking maybe you'd be somewhere ordering something or just getting to know the environment.

Ariela was back at chatting with friends, and Pedro was back at being silent, having no one to talk to. He got his phone and saw a message coming from you, opening immediately and thought it sounded more like an excuse than anything else, but when he was about to reply, his girlfriend's delicate hands stopped him "enjoy our lunch with us, honey" she pouted as he put his phone aside.

For the rest of the meal, Pedro tried taking you away from his mind, but he didn't know it would be so hard.

The rest of the day, he was alone with his thoughts, Ariela's voice echoing through his head, at the same time memories of the two of you weighed heavily in his heart. He liked Ariela, of course it wasn't the same intensity in which he liked you, but he'd read many times that love could be built, so what assured him it wouldn't happen to the two of them? His relationship was lasting longer than most of his previous ones often did, the fans always commented cute things when they were rarely spotted together getting out and about and the sex was mind-blowing.

He also thought of your friendship and couldn't help but wonder if things would've been easier if he had just let you go when you two stopped being a couple. His need of being around you was the main reason why you went back to being friends; Pedro was convinced he was going to suffer if he didn't have you around, but before Ariela came into the picture, he suffered just as much as he had you close but couldn't touch you.

And he still suffered, because he didn't want to make any choices, but if he had to in order to move on and be happy, he would do it.

Pedro got up from his bed and decided to knock on your door. You were staying on the same floor, so it was a quick walk to it, which was good because he wouldn't have enough time to give up saying what he wanted to say.

You groaned at the knocks on your door, feeling your social battery completely drained after spending your afternoon napping so you would stop crying.

You opened the door as you didn't expect to see Pedro at all, well, you kinda did, but you thought he would wait at least a day before kicking you out of his life.

He could tell you had been crying and he wondered if you knew what he was going to do there, if you would cry too much once he stepped out of your life.

"What do you want, Pedro?"

"We can't see each other anymore, Y/N" he sighed sadly but his expression was firm "I can pay you for the expenses you had to come over here, but I'd appreciate it if you went back home. I'm sorry, but it's time to move on, and I can't if you are around me all the time"

"Pedro? Why are you doing this? It makes no sense, I overheard you and Ariela talking at the restaurant and this is not what you want, it's what she wants…"

"Please Y/N don't be bitter just because my relationship with Ariela works better than the one we had, just please, pack your bags and fly home, I want to enjoy my days off with my girlfriend"

And just like that, Pedro turned his back to you and left you there, he'd made up his mind and you weren't a part of what he wanted in life anymore.

_____

A/N: Oh no, not me basing Pedro x reader on my favorite toxic couple of television! What can I tell you? I like my men like walking red flags ❤️

Also, fun fact: Ariela's character is based on my co-worker, he can be mean and bitchy to people sometimes and it makes me laugh hard and one day he snapped at me and I threatened him by saying I'd make a character that is a girl version of him who would be the villain in my Pedro stories, and he laughed thinking I was just joking LOL

[hayleythesugarbowl]

rachel green x reader headcanons

⋆ ˚｡⋆୨୧˚ masterlist • f•r•i•e•n•d•s masterlist ⋆ ˚｡⋆୨୧˚

a/n: we’re all a little in love with rachel right? on a mission to write hcs for all the friends characters 💋🩰

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~°~❦~°~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

dating rachel would include…

ok so you and rachel first met at her office 

wow, it’s not like she’s ever done that before. *cough* gavin, tag, mark (kinda) *cough*

what i’m saying is miss girl has a type

so you both worked in the same department and she started to develop a crush on you

one night when you were both working late

you started talking and it eventually led to you making out on her desk

aaand you’ve been dating ever since 

her friends were a little skeptical at first of her relationship with her coworker 

but eventually as they all got to know you, you became one of the group 

ross took longer than the rest of them to warm up to you ‘because of the history’

honestly rachel spoils you

always giving you fashion advice and buying you clothes

“oh, honey, this looks so good on you. and, you know, now you can throw out those old ones’

she loves your butt

calls you sweetie 

does that thing when you’re holding hands where she traces your hand with her finger

pillow princess 

she writes little sticky notes for you and puts them all over your apartment and in your pockets

and she always smells so good 

she drags you along to all of these spas places and you guys have spa days

she’s really good at giving gifts 

not so great at receiving them

‘oh, sweetie, i love it. it’s beautiful!’

‘rach, do you want the receipt?’

‘no! …. actually, can i just hold onto it?’

but she tries really hard to return only the stuff she really doesn’t want 

when you all do things as a group you and rach are always sneaking off to go spend some time alone

like once when ross brought all of you along on a muesem tour

and you and rachel were bored 

(you can only make fun of abstract art for so long)

so you snuck off to see if you could find something more interesting

and ended up getting caught ‘frolicking’, as the museum guard put it, behind a sculpture of a past president

‘wow, a public place, (y/n)! i don’t know, it’s kind of thrilling! i feel like joey!’

ross was furious 

‘i can’t believe you two! in a place of integrity and knowledge!’

to which rachel said 

‘i don’t know, ross. i saw a lot of people doing what me and (y/n) were doing in some of those greek paintings back there.’

and that ended that conversation

you guys get to spend almost every second together, what with seeing each other at work as well as outside of it

and sometimes it’s hard pretending not to be a couple at your job

lots of sneaky little touches 🤭

all of her friends love you so much and think you bring out the best in her 

(and joey just likes watching you two together)

you guys couldn’t be happier and rachel loves you so much 

…even more than weekend at bernie’s

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~°~❦~°~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

ˋ°•*⁀➷ hope guys enjoyed!! check out my other friends hcs on my masterlist and have a lovely day!! 🎀🖇️

[myveryownfanfiction]

18+ MINORS AND THOSE WITHOUT AGE IN BIO DNI

tags: @illiana-mystery, @iobsessoverfictionalmen

matthew perry august 19

warnings: swearing

I hid behind the couch and bit my lip. Joey had offered to take chandler out today, knowing I didn’t like lying to him. The two of us had created an elaborate surprise party for him. Joey took him to a Knick’s game while I put the finishing touches on the party. Monica was behind the counter, Rachel and Ross were in chandlers room and phoebe was in joeys room. Various others from chandlers work were hidden throughout the apartment. I heard the door open and the lights turned on.

“Surprise!” We all yelled as we jumped up. Chandler stared at us all, blinking owlishly at me as his nerves settled.

“Happy birthday chandler.” I said, walking over and wrapping my arms around him. “Sorry I couldn’t…” chandler kissed me softly.

“you couldn’t lie to me. I know.” He said. “Thank you.” We smiled at each other before chandler broke away to take off his jacket. “Wow. This is a turn out.” He joked, wrapping an arm around me.

“It was all (Y/N)’s idea.” Monica said, patting my shoulder. Chandler smiled at me again.

“Oh I can imagine." He teased me. Chandler started to make his way around the room, talking to everyone and introducing me to people I hadn't met before today. Eventually we ended up on the couch, leaning into each other. "Thank you again." He whispered, playing with my fingers. I smiled softly at him.

"You're welcome." Chandler kissed me softly. "It feels like the least I can do. You've done so much for me, this feels small in comparison." He shook his head and tugged me closer.

"It means everything." He assured me. "More than you will ever know." I nodded and leaned my head on his shoulder. "So where are the presents?" I faked shock and Chandler's face fell slightly.

"Presents?" I asked. Chandler nodded slowly. "At Monica's." He rolled his eyes and I laughed. "Figured you would want to open them in peace. Your coworkers don't know you as well as we do. Didn't think you would want to open anything in front of them and have to fake it."

"Oh they brought something?" He asked, surprise on his face. I nodded. "Didn't expect that. You guys sure. Them..." Chandler shook his head.

"There's receipts in case you need to return anything." I whispered. Chandler nodded. "Just don't go returning anything we got you. Rachel would have a fit." We giggled as Rachel walked past us. She rolled her eyes at us as she passed.

"So how much longer do we have to tolerate these stiffs?" Joey asked as he sat down next to me.

"Until we can force them out." I whispered back. "Sorry Chan. But they are."

"I don't understand how you can work with them." Joey said. Chandler laughed.

"I make jokes with you guys because my soul is dying there." He said. "I do need a new job though." I nodded and smiled as he kissed my temple. "Alright. I'm kicking them out. I'm bored." Chandler got up and went to usher his coworkers out.

"Well at least he's having fun." Joey said. I nodded.

"That's all anyone can ask for on their birthday." I agreed as I watched Chandler shoo the unwanted guests out.

"Alright! Present time!" He cheered as he headed towards Monica's apartment. I laughed as I followed him, everyone trailing behind me.

[whowantslovergirl]

Two nerds in a pod

Ross Geller x reader (reader is female with she/her pronouns)

warnings: just pure fluff, y/n is a doctor yall aka paleontologist, but that’s it 🥳 friends masterlist

Summary: The one where Ross met someone just like him and fell in love

posted: May 10, 2024

“And that’s why the Salin theory is pure bullshit!” Ross was going on and on about some paleontology theory. You overheard and walked over to the couch in the coffee shop. “Hi sorry I couldn’t help but over hear but are you a paleontologist by any chance?”

“Yes, yes I am.” You immediately got happy and squealed and his two friends jumped. “I am too!”

“Oh my god?! You are?!” You nodded. “Yes I love dinosaurs.”

“Oh my god there’s two of them.” His friend said you didn’t say anything cause you can tell he was joking. “Sorry for him that’s Chandler.”

“I’m Y/n. But ima go but here’s my number you should call me sometime and we can talk about how the Salin theory is indeed not bullshit.” You left your money at the coffee table and left. Ross had a dreamy look on his face.

“Wow! I never met another paleontologist?!” Ross said while looking at the card. They all just looked at him. “She’s just like you Ross.”

“I know!”

______

Ross never called. But that didn’t matter because you called him.

“Um hello.” He tried to sound cool. You laughed. “Hey mystery man. You know I never got your name.”

“Oh it’s Ross, Dr.Geller.”

“Oh we’re being formal? Well I’m Dr. L/n”

You guys got to talking and you kept trying to hint that you wanted to go on a date but he just wouldn’t get it.

“So what’s your dream date Ross?”

“Um probably something with astrology.”

“Oh my god! Ross I’m asking you on a date wanna go?” You took his silence as a yes. “Ok pick me up at 7:30.”

Oh he’s in for it.

______

You guys went on exactly ten dates. You were finally going to meet his friends and sister. You were nervous but excited. He just walked in and everything looked at you. That made you even more nervous.

“Everyone this is Y/n. Y/n this is Joey, Chandler, Phoebe, Rachel, and Monica.”

“Hi Y//n.” They all said. You just waved then the questions started. “So what do you do?” The blonde one with the unique style said.

“Oh I am a paleontologist.” They all groaned and you instantly felt insecure.

“Hey! Hey! Don’t be rude.” Ross said and they all fixed their attitude. He turned to you. “They’re just scared they’re going to hear about dinosaurs.”

“Oh I try not to bore people with my job.” They all smiled and went to hug you.

“We love Y/n!”

______

You guys were all at the coffee shop just talking. Then you found out something that you didn’t know about Ross.

“You were married three times?!” He looked at Joey who brought it up.

“Thank you Joe.”

“You only told me about the lesbian.” You turned to Ross in amusement. “What’s the story with the other two?” At the mention of the other two divorces everyone just walked away but stayed close. He grabbed your hands. “Well the second time I kinda said the wrong name.”

“Whose name did you say?”

“Yea Ross whose name did you say?” Phoebe added.

“Um well it was Rachel’s and before you say anything that was when I was in love with her.” You just nodded.

“And the third time?”

“Married Rachel is Vegas.”

“Wait after you said her name at the last wedding?!” Is he still in love her? Are you just a rebound? All the thoughts running through your mind. I mean you can be that girlfriend that completely takes him away for his friends.

“Well are you still in love with Rachel?”

“No no no. I don’t think about her anymore. Like ew Rachel.” He chuckled nervously.

“I’m right here Ross.” Rachel said.

“Rachel not the time!” Ross exclaimed. You are a little suspicious. I mean who wouldn’t be?!

“I promise Y/n. I am not in love with Rachel.” You just nodded.

Let’s hope this wasn’t a mistake.

______

“Come in!” I walked into Ross’s apartment. “Hey babe.” You gave him a peck on the lips. You came over so he can show you his fossil collection. You already showed yours and he swears he has a batter collection.

“These are 58 fossils ok?”

“Yeah Ross I can count.” He just shushed me dramatically and you giggled. You really like how funny he is especially when he doesn’t try. He began to show all them off and explain as if you guys aren’t in the same career path. But you let him geek out anyway. You got a little turned on by how excited he was and one thing led to another.

He should talk about fossils more often.

_____

You and Ross were at the coffee house with all his friends and you guys were talking about the Salin Theory. He said it doesn’t make sense and you say that it was a groundbreaking discovery. Obviously his friends were not fond of this conversation.

Chandler groaned. “I cant take it anymore!” You both just look at him. “Leave them alone Chandler I think it’s cute.” Phoebe said.

“Thanks Phoebe.” You and Ross said.

“Yea they’re like two nerds in a pod.” At this you both made a face and left. Now that you think about they’re really not all that different.

And you love that.

An: hope you enjoy my lovers 🤍🤍🤍

[lilisouless]

Jesper: i don't want to be Joey

Nina: Joey is lovable, Joey has game

Jesper: no one remembers that! people just think of Joey as the dumb one

Wylan: well he wasn't dumb the first three episodes, so you could say he was too cool so he had to be dumbed down

Jesper: please, "cool joey" was boring, thats why he had to be dumb. Anyway i refuse to be Joey, i want to be Rachel

Matthias: Rachel is selfish

Jesper: so what? she is pretty, also it fits me because i am on a relationship with our Ross

Wylan: i am so not Ross!

Jesper: yes, you are , the nerd one

Wylan: i am not a "nerd" i just...is this a set up for me listing reasons why i am not a nerd only to prove i am in fact a nerd so its more dignified if i just accept the hit right now?

Jesper: thats why you are the smart one, rossie

Wylan: i hate you

Nina: if you are Rachel then i am Phoebe, but ...Inej shouldn't be...

Inej: i am fine being Monica, people fear Monica, i like that and she works with knives, its perfect for me

Kaz: so, since i am no fir for Joey, that makes me Chandler

Matthias: but i am not fit for Joey either

Kaz: please, you are the dumb one

Nina: oh! Matthias can be Phoebe´s husband

Kaz: thats actually pretty appropiate, he is played by an actor that never gets old while Matthias looks like he has never been young; its poetic

Wylan: you being chandler is also poetic because Chandler was a guy who everyone in universe thinks is uncool while the audience thinks he is pretty lovable; you on the other hand think you are the coolest one on the world while your audience well...

Kaz: Jesper, your pet is getting bitchy again

Nina: but what about Joey? we can't have a gang without one

Kuwei passing by: don't look at me, i am clearly a Gunther

(next day)

Nikolai: Zoya look! Brekker sent me a letter inviting me to be part of their friend group

Zoya: you know he probably has malicious intentions

Nikolai: who cares?

[secret77778888]

Lukola a September fan fic 🤞 manifesting!!! Part 3

I was inspired by @herejusttosufferalong and her anon to write this:

“I want to know if you’re single because… I want to date you. I broke up with her. I’m tired of this Ross and Rachel bullshit.” I was miserable, I missed you so much all summer, I thought that I was going crazy, my world was upside-down, it turned darker every day, everything seemed boring and irrelevant when I was not with you, everything was tasteless and useless, you make my life so much better".

Nicola was stunned. Speechless, she was staring at him, disarmed by his words. Her eyes softened as she saw the genuine pain in his. But she couldn’t let go of her own hurt.

“No” she simply said.

“I want you, Nicola. Only you” he said moving closer to her.

“Don’t date another man. I’m yours.” He said with conviction.

His expression changed, a mixture of determination and desperation. He stepped closer, his eyes locked on hers. She backed against the wall, not expecting his advance. The air between them crackled with unresolved tension. He gently lifted her chin, forcing her to meet his gaze. She saw the depth of his feelings, the intensity that had been missing.

“Don’t speak,” he whispered, his voice low and commanding. “I’m done going back and forth. I’m done waiting for the right time. I need you now.” He pressed his body against hers, his hands pinning her wrists against the wall,overpowering her totally, he was so tall and she was so tiny. She let out a small sound, a mix of surprise and longing. His touch was electrifying, sending shivers down her spine.

He leaned in and kissed her left cheek, his hand caressing her other cheek. " I want to be yours, he said gruffly “and I want you to be mine “he murmured in her ear, he moved a little to see her face, his eyes searching hers for any sign of resistance.

She could feel her resolve melting, her body responding to his nearness. "Please," she whispered, her voice barely audible, filled with need.

He leaned even more wanting to capture her lips with his, she parted hers delicately, the kiss started slowly but it quickly became voracious. She responded eagerly, deepening the kiss, her hand roaming through his curly thick hair. His moan vibrated against her lips, and he pulled her closer, his hands wandering about freely on her body, his hand grabbing her breasts, his lips kissing her everywhere with voracity, he was hungry of her.

They moved to the sofa, still lost in each other, Nicola put her hands on his bum, he growled with pleasure, she straddled him, their connection electric, both smiling despite the intensity. For a moment, everything else faded away, leaving only the two of them, rewriting their story one kiss at a time.

Disclaimer: Any similarities with actual persons is purely intentional and totally fictional

[blueraineshadows]

Sebastian x MC

A quick drabble inspired by a scene in Friends between Ross and Rachel - GN!MC

MC took a quick last gulp of juice and stood brushing the breakfast crumbs from their robe.

"And where are you off to in such a hurry?" Sebastian asked curiously.

"I'm meeting up with Garreth," they said, climbing over the bench.

Sebastian frowned, not liking the sound of this at all, he had visions of spending your Saturday secluded away somewhere very private. "What do you mean? This is the first I've heard of it."

"Oh, sorry," they said pausing. "We're working on a potions paper together so we're going to work on it down by the lake. It's such a lovely day, it would be a shame to waste it."

Sebastian's frown deepened. "Indeed."

MC straightened their robes and ran fingers hastily through their hair, almost as though worried about looking nice for Garreth. Sebastian really did not like this one bit and dropped his toast, getting to his feet. "Wait, is there room for one more?"

MC frowned in confusion. "Why would you want to work on a paper you don't need to?"

Sebastian shrugged. "I could just keep you company."

MC laughed. "Don't be daft. You'll only get bored and start distracting me. No, you enjoy your day off. I can catch up with you later."

MC turned to leave but Sebastian caught hold of their robes. "Hold on now," he said. He pulled them round to him and planted his lips firmly on theirs. MC gasped in surprise, lips parting. Sebastian took advantage, kissing them slowly and with plenty of heat.

The other students at the table paused in their breakfast, mouths agape at the saucy display of public affection.

Sebastian let MC go, leaving them a panting, blushing mess. "Enjoy your study session."

MC stuttered out a goodbye before hurrying from the Great Hall, heart pounding and lips tingling.

Sebastian sat back down, his grin smug. "Let's see how they manage to study after that mind blowing kiss. They won't be able to stop thinking about me."

Ominis snorted into his cup of tea. "Really, Sebastian? Or, you just sufficiently turned MC on and then sent them straight into the company of another boy, a boy who clearly fancies MC no less."

Sebastian's smug grin slips. He drops the toast he had just picked up. "Ominis, I have a sudden urge to take a stroll around the lake. Care to join me?"

[maraczeks]

friends s4 thread pt 2

[wronglennon]

the funny thing about friends is i love chandler and monica and i would have been perfectly happy for joey and phoebe to have something but every time i am so consistently bored by ross and rachel

[aficionadoenthusiast]

I absolutely hate these kinds of posts so I thought I'd do it to see first hand how many people actually like it and care about other people's opinions on their ships so...

my arbitrary ratings of non canon pjoverse relationships and why I think they would never work (or would) (scroll down for canon)

perachel: 3/10 nothing but platonic vibes, their brief stint felt more like an experiment than genuine romantic feelings or attraction; they both deserved better

percico: 1/10 a reiteration of an earlier post: their relationship would get bogged down by unshared feelings and grief, plus nico's crush was just a crush, and percy never had feelings in the first place

perlypso: 0/10 their whole interaction was percy being half dead and calypso being manipulated, not to mention she cursed him

pereyna: 2/10 any het relationship with reyna feels icky to me, she just seems so queer coded (which makes sense cause she literally joined an ace club), and percy was so focused on annabeth when they first met it just doesn't seem fair to either of them

pipercy: 4/10 this is a FRIENDSHIP I wanna see them figuring out they're bi together so much platonic potential

jercy: 7/10 honestly if I had to put these two with anyone else, I would choose this ship solely for the tension in mark of athena and that an alternate ship name is person

percypollo: 0/10 icky, pedophilic, and honestly kinda homophobic. percy would never enter a relationship with a god anyway

percy/literally any god: 0/10 see percypollo

lukercy: -1/10 imo there is no way to write this in a way that's not abusive, predatory, and just bad in general. i will not take the "enemies to lovers" storyline for this one either because there are some things that just aren't redeemable, and i consider luke's actions irredeemable. plus both their histories with annabeth make this ship very, very icky

pipabeth: 9/10 favorite non canon pairing, I can totally see a threesome with Percy, these two have such a great dynamic, only minus a point because I love percabeth too much

lukabeth: 0/10 sexist, icky, just all around a red flag

jasabeth: 2/10 nothing but platonic vibes

reynabeth: 4/10 they would be so powerful together, but feelings and emotional skills would be their undoing

jeyna: 0/10 see pereyna

leyna: 2/10 sibling vibes and see pereyna

theyna: 8/10 see reynabeth, but also I would love to see their similarities come to a head when they actually have to confront their feelings

apollo/reyna: 0/10 this is a thing?? ew???? reyna has such a huge issue with authority and the gods in general, it would never work, and see pereyna and percypollo

pipeyna: 7/10 would be good, but I need more info, though I think it would bring piper's jealousies to a nice full circle, especially if it was used in a way that helps piper figure out her sexuality

liper: 3/10 sibling vibes, I do not like

jiper: 5/10 that's right y'all, this isn't canon anymore! cute while it lasted, but they were completely made up and forced together by hera. that does not make a good, trusting relationship where one party is missing crucial details and the other remembers things that didn't happen, honestly i would have much rather they just ended it in lost hero when they realized hera was manipulating them

thaluke: 3/10 so much complicated history, I see them as ross and rachel from friends only worse

valgrace: 6/10 platonic mostly, but I can see it turning into something; I think they could definitely be good for each other; would love to see some healing centered stuff for them

valdangelo: 0/10 they barely interact, and their personalities are not the cute "opposites attract" it is straight up "we are both intensely traumatized, but in different, incredibly clashing ways"

haleo: 4/10 I can see it, but with sammy, it's just too complicated

fraleo: 5/10 I like the tension, but ultimately their personalities would clash too much

frazeleo: 10/10 this might be the only non canon ship I really wish was canon. separate, they are boring and clash with each other so much, but I think having the three of them together would provide a buffer when necessary while also keeping things fun and interesting

jasico: 3/10 very much a sibling relationship, seems to me like they were just shoved together because they were there

tratie: 10/10 floors me that they aren't canon

sally/poseidon: 2/10 sure it would work but she is an independent woman who wants less a man and more someone to love her and be there for her that isn't her son

ruegard: 8/10 would 100% ship it if i didn't love beckengard so much, plus i love the patrochilles parallels here

canon ships in order from least favorite to favorite:

zeus/hera: -10/10 sucks ass, their relationship is built on mistrust and a forced marriage, hera is quite literally shackled while zeus does whatever the hell he feels like while hera takes her anger out on anyone but him

god's/any of their affairs: 0/10 there's a reason none of them lasted

piper/shel: 4/10 another reiteration: ig it could be something, but it was literally a few paragraphs, and we know piper is experimenting with her sexuality, so it could be anything, not just a permanent romantic ship

caleo: 4/10 calypso needs some time to figure herself out and not be chained to a person or place; maybe they can try again after they both have some more life experience

frazel: 6/10 cute, but they're still pretty young, even by pjo standards, and compared to the other canon ships they're kinda dull imo, but i do love the awkwardness

beckengard: 9/10 absolutely love it, wartime romance, tension, dying for each other, trying for elysium for each other, only minus a point because one of them was a spy

sally/paul: 9/10 i love it, i'm so glad sally finally found a decent man, only minus a point because...adults

gruniper: 9/10 very cute, would be 10/10 but the start of their relationship felt kinda wonky to me like rick just wanted to pair grover with someone

solangelo: 10/10 adorable, checks all my boxes - opposites attract, healing from trauma, one extrovert one introvert, there is absolutely no downside

percabeth: 11/10 the OGs, the ship i use as a standard for all of my other ships no matter the fandom, still my absolute favorite ship, there was not a single bad track, they are so good for each other

[exhaustedpirate]

the one where Emma is pregnant

for everyone who didn't ask for it, I wrote a two-shot fic of that plotline on friends where Joey realises he loves Rachel but Ross kinda gets in the way but I made it CaptainSwan and (don't come at me) made it as it should have happened on the show ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ massive thanks to @belovedcreation for being my beta and having so much patience with me! rated T | 7662 words also on AO3

Chapter One - Killian

Killian Jones was going to hell.

Not only was he going to hell but he was living it too.

Emma Swan was pregnant. He was in love with Emma Swan. And he was not the father of Emma Swan’s baby. 

On top of that, Emma Swan did not love him back and was currently in the living room they shared reading Dr. Seuss to her 6-month bump, in a painfully (read, lovely) domestic scene.

Maybe not hell but very close.

“You have brains in your head. You have feet in your shoes. You can steer yourself in any direction you choose.” Killian heard from the kitchen, watching her hand make absent-minded shapes on her clothed belly. “You're on your own. And you know what you know. And YOU are the one who'll decide where to go...” 

He took a deep centering breath. He did that a lot around her.

“Think the lad will come out speaking in rhymes?” He asked playfully, coming to sit on the arm of the couch.

“Ha-ha, very funny,” Even without looking at her, he could tell she was rolling her eyes and he smiled. “All the baby books say to talk to the baby, so he knows your voice and since I don’t want to bore him with adoption bureaucracy, Dr. Seuss will do.” With a pleased grin, Emma burrowed further into the carefully placed pillows and flipped the page. “You’ll look up and down streets. Look’em-” Taking advantage of her single-hand hold, Killian took the book from her hand. “Hey!”

“He is probably tired of your voice by now,” He teased, ignoring her raised eyebrow glare. “Uncle Killian is the master storyteller here.” 

Emma scoffed, clearly trying to hide her smile. “Alright, Uncle Killian, dazzle us.” 

“Make yourself comfortable, Swan.” 

She made a show of fixing herself, positioning her body towards him with an expectant gaze, her hands on her five-month pregnant belly. For a moment, he let himself watch her, pretend for a moment that this was his. “We’re waiting.”

He shook off his fantasies, winking at her to disguise his turmoil. “You’ll look up and down streets. Look’em over with care. About some you will say, ‘I don’t choose to go there.’” Her eyes closed when he glanced over to her and his smile grew. “With your head full of brains and your shoes full of feet, you’re too smart to go down any not-so-good street.”

“Wow!”

Killian turned sharply to Emma at her exclamation, finding her with eyes wide open and a surprised smile on her face. “What’s wrong?”

“Nothing, he just gave the strongest kick!”

He couldn’t help the fascinated expression on his face as he glanced between her belly and her face. “Really?”

“Yeah! Here,” Without warning, she grabbed his hand, the book forgotten to the floor.

His hand glided over her clothed belly guided by her own and he couldn’t help but to watch as her eyebrows scrunched in concentration, her teeth teasing her bottom lip. Tempting.

As if aware of his wandering thoughts, he felt a mighty kick against his palm startling a gasp out of him. “Did you feel it?” 

“Aye,” Killian breathed out in fascination, a grin stretching over his mouth at the feel of a second kick right under his fingers. “He’s strong.”

“Don’t I know it,” Emma chuckled with a hint of a reproach towards the small human growing inside her. “He’s been kicking at me for a few weeks but the books were saying that people should start being able to feel it about now.”

Killian felt a third softer push against his palm and he began to move his fingers in a soothing gesture. “You’ve been kicking your mother, lad, that’s not very nice.” He admonished in a soft voice, directed at the baby. His rebellious response was two consecutive kicks to his hand causing Emma to snort in amusement. “Apologies, love, I tried.” He chuckled.

“That’s alright,” Emma sighed with a blissfully happy smile on her face, her hands rubbing up and down the sides of her belly, her fingers touching his on every up stroke. “He just likes Uncle Killian’s voice.” 

He met her gaze. Her green eyes were a reflection of her happiness, of her serenity. Despite any misgivings upon discovering her pregnancy, there was no one who loved her baby more than Emma Swan. And all he wanted to do, all he was focusing on not doing was kissing her. Kissing her and telling her he loved her. Telling her he wanted to spend the rest of his days with her. Her and her lad.

That, in fact, had been the biggest shock of it all. Killian Jones, eternal bachelor and avid birth control advocate, wanted to be a father. Wanted to be a husband.

All because of Emma Swan.

“Hey, sorry I’m late,” The sudden opening of the apartment door caused Killian to startle into standing before turning towards Neal. “Traffic was a bitch.”

“It’s Friday, everyone wants to get home first,” Emma groaned as she pushed herself into standing.

“I can relate,” Neal snarked, wrapping his arms around Emma for a quick hug before turning to Killian. “Thought you would be at the Rabbit Hole by now, or on a hot date.”

“Nah,” Killian waved the idea away. “I wanted to make sure Emma would be okay until you got here.”

“You’re a good guy,” Neal smiled with a pat to Killian’s shoulder. “Now that I’m here, we should really go.”

“Yeah,” Emma sighed, fixing her bag on her shoulder. “I told the doctor we would be late but we shouldn’t keep them longer.”

“I want to know everything when you’re back.” Killian said, as he always did.

“Don’t worry, Uncle Killian, I’ll give you a picture to add to the fridge.” Emma laughed, her hand running down his arm as she followed Neal to the door.

“See you later, man.” Neal waved leaving Killian alone in his living room, arm in the air in a wave.

To add fuel to the hellfire. Neal Cassidy was his best friend. Neal Cassidy was the baby’s father. And Neal Cassidy was also in love with Emma Swan.

---

Killian would admit, only under threat of excruciating torture, that he was jealous of Neal. It hadn’t always been the case, of course. He’d met him years ago through his flatmate, David, who had been Neal’s college roommate. 

He hadn’t been jealous then. Didn’t envy Neal’s broken engagement or the betrayal that led to it. Didn’t envy having to restart his life after something like that. Not when he had gone through the same too. 

So what if Neal and Emma had been friends during their school years? They shared the same friend group, so really nothing to be jealous of.

And it wasn’t like he had loved Emma for years, pining away in dark corners and brooding in a lonely room.

Truth was, Emma had fascinated him from the first moment they met. Strong-willed and caring, not to mention absolutely gorgeous, she had burst into their lives in a pink skin-tight dress. Hazards of the job, she called it. Apparently, she had followed her skip to New York and proceeded to ‘honey trap’ him, her words. There had been some choice words directed at her that had led her to the bar their group had been at as well, giving Emma and Mary Margaret an enthusiastic reunion. And he was entranced.

His reputation as a bit of a philanderer, however, had her keeping her distance from him. He couldn’t blame her. It would have likely ended badly if they had fallen into bed with each other. Probably.

In any case, they were friends. Emma had warmed up to him as he opened up to her. They shared stories, scars, adventures. He still slept around, she did too. She dated some people, so did he. She fell in love with Neal, he… was happy for her.

They were friends and it was enough for him.

Until it wasn’t.

David and Mary Margaret’s wedding was years in the making, more than a decade probably. It was clear to anyone who knew them that those two were perfect for each other. So to not only be a part of their wedding but to do so as the officiant was the best day of his life. 

Finding out that Emma was pregnant with Neal’s baby did put a damper on the occasion.

He would have also preferred that said baby hadn’t been conceived at his place but Killian was making the conscious choice to put all that far away from his brain. 

But it was fine, he had offered his spare room after Tink’s flat caught on fire. He had wanted to be there for his best friend and his infatuation was manageable. Besides, he didn’t want to ruin their friendship over some physical attraction he felt towards her. He had learned to live with it by trying to find a replacement in other people. Not exactly the healthiest but they were all consenting adults. 

Of course, he should know that managing it wouldn’t cut it for too long.

“Killian,” Emma called, in that soft voice that told him she was about to ask him something. “Can you get me a muffin, please?”

He grinned, raising an eyebrow at her. 

“Come on, I’ll make sure to tell the baby all about their amazing Uncle Killian.” She pouted,  as she pointedly rubbed her bump, beautifully round 4 months into the gestation process, her eyes shining with mirth. 

“You know, Swan,” he started, standing up. “Once that baby is out, you’ll have to stop using him to get what you want.” 

“Agree to disagree,” She grinned as he shook his head with a matching smile. “Chocolate, please.” 

He sighed, aware that all that hemming and hawing was purely for show. He would give her anything she asked for. He delighted in the happy wiggle she did on the coffee shop’s chair as he handed her her muffin, in the brilliant smile on her face. In a happy Emma.

“Actually, Swan, I want your opinion on something.”

“Shoot.” 

Killian grinned at her muffled voice, her mouth full of muffin. “I’m trying to figure where to take Ariel on a date, do you know of any good restaurants?”

“Ariel? Who’s that?” 

“Someone I met at the bar the other day, did I not mention her?”

“No,” She frowned as she wiped her mouth.

“Well, I need to impress her, if you know what I mean.” He winked, making it all the more exaggerated for the eye roll.

“Right,” She grunted.

“Something wrong?”

“Nope,” She quickly answered, popping the ‘p’. “Just make sure to go to her house this time, I wanna sleep.”

Killian’s grin widened. “Not to worry, Swan, I won’t get between you and sleep again. But will you help me?”

“Hmm,” Emma hummed as she broke the muffin into small pieces. “You could take her to Bella Notte, they make delicious food and it’s so beautiful there.” Her voice lightened as she spoke, her lips ticking up in a smile.

“That sounds good.” “And, afterwards, you could take her to Any Given Sundae for dessert. Or take her on a walk on the docks. Oh! Take her dancing!”

“That’s all well and good, Swan, but won’t all of that make her too tired to have sex with me?” He asked with a raised eyebrow, his grin threatening to split his face.

Emma rolled her eyes, sitting back on the couch with a pout.

“I’m sorry, love, those are great ideas.” Killian reassured with a soft smile.

“I can’t believe I miss dating,” She sighed, placing her free hand on her already visible bump. “I actually miss getting dressed up and going somewhere fancy with some random guy that will disappoint me in bed but will at least take me to a nice restaurant. I won’t be able to do that for a long time…” She patted her belly before turning back to Killian. “Not that I’m not excited to give birth to a sixteen pound baby, of course.”

Killian smiles at her understandingly. “Hey, Swan?”

“Yeah?”

“Do you want to go on a date with me?”

He almost laughed at the way her mouth gaped open before she scoffed, composing herself. “Yeah, right, like you would wanna go out with a pregnant woman.”

“You’re right,” Killian nodded, watching as her shoulders dropped in resignation. “I want to go out with my best friend and have a good time.” His heart soared at the soft smile on her face, a strange spark of something in her eyes. “Besides, it’ll take your mind off birth plans, c-sections, pushing a human head out of your-”

“Alright!” Emma interrupted loudly, glaring at his laughter before joining him. “I’d love to go out with you.”

“I promise you’ll have fun.” Killian winked before standing up to leave with a kiss to her head. “Be ready at 7.”

In hindsight, he should know that hell is filled with good intentions and, as previously said, he was in hell. While all he wanted was to make his best friend happy, he hadn’t been able to ignore the fluttering in his chest at the prospect of this date.

Killian knocked on his flat door at exactly 7pm. He heard her call out to him from inside and resisted the urge to laugh. He knocked once more and held his breath when he heard her approach. Emma opened the door and he was sure his heart had stopped at the sight of her surprised smile.

“What are you doing out there?” Emma asked, a confused smile on her face.

His grin widened. “I’m here to pick you up for our date.” He pulled his hand from behind his back handing her a red rose. “For you.”

Killian watched as her smile grew more genuine, her eyes softening. He felt her fingers brush against his as she took the flower from his hand. “Thank you.” He let her awed whisper and the way her eyes fluttered shut as she smelled the rose to nestle in his chest.

Right, hell.

“This is great,” She smiled widely as she turned to him. “It actually feels like we’re going on a real date,” She whirled around, letting the smell of her vanilla shampoo hit his nose at the movement, to put the rose in a glass of water. “Though, I do have a hint of morning sickness and this was the only dress I could fit in that was date-worthy.”

Killian let his eyes wander down her body at the mention. Her red dress fit snugly around her bump and left her legs bare from the knee down. He remembered the dress from one of their outings to the bar and how loose it had fit her then. She had kept her hair down and it shone even in the artificial lighting. She looked breathtaking.

He mentally shook himself away from fantasies about taking that dress off her. “Alright, Swan, I’m making it my mission to make you forget all about that,” he grinned before clearing his throat and fixing his posture. “Right, so, you have a nice place, I like your book collection.”

“Actually, that’s my roommate’s,” She played along, a beautiful smirk on her face. 

“Your roommate? A fellow reader, they sound interesting.”

“He is but he’s also very protective so be warned.” She grinned as she grabbed her bag and her coat.

“And uh, is he good looking?” 

“Mhmm.” 

He approached with a swagger as she turned her back to the door, entranced by her happy smile. “Oh, it must be tough to keep your hands to yourself…”

Her soft laughter reached into his chest. “Actually, I think he has a leather kink, you know what I mean?” She winked as she opened the door to leave.

“Way to ruin the game, Swan.” He rolled his eyes, a faux annoyed tone to his voice even as he all but skipped out of the flat. 

Emma was still laughing as they got out of the cab in front of the restaurant. Just like she’d suggested, he had booked them a table by the window at Bella Notte.

“What did I tell you?” Emma smiles, dazzled and vindicated. “Isn’t it beautiful?” 

It was beautiful but that’s not where his attention was. It was on the way the warm candle light reflected in her hair. And the way her eyes shone with delight. And the way it made everything look so much more intimate. 

And the way it put him in so much trouble.

“You’re always right, Swan,” he sighed, hoping she would take his tone as reluctance and not this fascination running through him.

Emma winked and he smirked as he rushed to pull the chair out for her. Her smile grew as she sat down, looking up at him. “Hmm, Killian Jones is a gentleman on dates.”

“Don’t sound so surprised,” Killian winked, taking her coat from her before taking one of her hands in his free one. “I’m always a gentleman.” 

He hoped it hadn’t been his wishful thinking that he saw a shiver run down her arm at the kiss he placed on her knuckles, his eyes locked with hers. It was only the movement from an approaching waiter that broke him from the spell of her green gaze. He cleared his throat taking his seat, missing the disappointed look on her face or the way she rubbed the place where he kissed with his thumb. He had to show a semblance of control.

The waiter offered them a wine menu which had Emma’s brow furrowed in disappointment. In a show of support, Killian ordered a lasagna for two - after receiving Emma’s approving nod - with their best non-alcoholic beverage.

“You really don’t have to do this, Killian,” Emma pressed her lips together, even as he noticed the appreciative spark in her eyes. “I’m the one who can’t drink, not you.”

“I know.” 

Her cheeks reddened under his smirk before she smiled fully back at him. Emma shuffled in her seat before she crossed her arms on the table, staring at him with searching eyes.

“So, besides pulling chairs, what else does Gentleman Killian do on dates?”

“Are you saying I need more than just my good looks?” He laughed at her answering look, raised eyebrows and all. “Well, my brother always taught me to listen, be respectful and polite. You have him to thank.” 

Emma sat back on her chair, raising an incredulous eyebrow. “Really? No special moves? What about the hand kiss?”

“I’m just my irresistible self, Swan, that’s all I really need,” Killian winked as he mirrored her posture. “Don’t worry, I don’t have any special tricks that will make you fall in love with me.”

She still looked unconvinced as she inspected him, watching his eyes. He decided to level the playing field, leaning forward to place his elbows on the table.

“What about you, Swan? Any tricks?”

“I don’t need any tricks,” She smirked, pushing away hair from her shoulder in a slow move. His eyes tracked the movement of her hand as she brought it back down her chest before settling it back on her lap. When he looked up at her, her smile was wide and triumphant. “I just clean up well and that’s usually enough.”

“Well,” Killian cleared his throat, sitting back on his chair and scratching at the back of his neck. “That will do it.”

Emma laughed delightedly. That does it too. The waiter returned with their food and beverages and it tasted just as delicious as it smelled. Despite the initial plan of pretending to be on a real date, their conversation topics and general posture is equal to every other time they’ve been together. 

With some differences. He felt the touch of her hand on his far more often as he forcefully pushed down his desire to hold it, especially when she dragged her fingers away and he felt her touch emblazoned on his skin. He watched her more attentively than usual too. The way her eyes sparkled, the way her full lips stretched, the way they parted, the way she ran her tongue over them, the way he just wanted to press his lips against hers.

Killian wondered if that is one of her special tricks on a date. He wondered if it would matter if they were. He wondered if it would stop the ache and the pining in his chest for something real with Emma Swan.

“This was great,” Emma smiled brightly, her coat wrapped around her shoulders as they reached their flat door. “Thank you for doing this.”

“It was my pleasure, love,” Killian smiled as he stood close to her, his hand coming up to push her hair over her shoulder. “I had a lot of fun.”

They were close. He could see the specks of gold in her green eyes and had never felt such a desperate need to touch her, hold her. He thought he heard her breath quicken before she cleared her throat.

“Well, how do dates usually end for Killian Jones?” 

Her smirk wasn’t as bright as before, a hint of anxiety in her eyes and he wondered - hoped - she was jealous, as unrealistic as it was.

“In bed, either mine or theirs, as you well know,” Her unimpressed gaze lost its strength under the red hue of her cheeks. “Or did you want to know how I get them there?”

“Can’t blame a girl for being curious,” At his hesitation, she continued. “Afraid I can’t handle it?” She raised her eyebrow as she crossed her arms over his chest and he wanted to kiss that smirk off her lips. “Try me, Jones.”

“Alright, don’t say I didn’t warn you,” Killian smirked, taking a fortifying breath, not just as a need to focus but to hold on to his restraint. “I usually get really close and say,” He raised his hand to cup her cheek, his fingers in her hair while his thumb rubbed against her cheek, his eyes glancing between her widened eyes and her lips. “You owe me a second date, love,” He lowered his voice, invading her personal space as his thumb moved down to whisper over her parted bottom lip. “I spent the whole night distracted by your lips.”

He felt her shaky breath on the pad of his thumb as he kept his eyes on hers. The way her pupils widened to swallow the green. The way her chest rose and fell to accommodate her stuttered breathing. He felt his heart beat faster on his chest as a feel of desire ran down his body. Maybe he’s the one who can’t handle it.

Emma blinked rapidly, her eyes losing their dazed quality as she focused on the here and now. She pulled back, removing her face from his touch as he noticed how she had leaned towards him in response. 

“Wow, that is good, I almost believed you.” She let out in a shaky laugh, turning around to grab the keys from her back to open the door to their flat. He is thankful for the opportunity to gather some control now that he’s away from her captivating gaze. “I can see that working.”

Should he tell her that, despite having done it many times before, it had never affected him as much as then? 

“Well, it worked with you too,” he quipped, putting on his tried and true swagger as he followed her in. “It got me inside your place.” 

Her surprised laughter lifts his spirits and has his smile widening. “Right, I mean you did say it would work!”

Killian winked, stuffing his hands in his pockets to stop him from touching her again. “What about you? Anything you do to get them in your room?”

“Well,” Emma started with a smirk, dropping his jacket on the couch and approaching him, causing his fists to clench in his pocket. “It’s all about the hands, right?”

Her eyes lock onto his as she places her hands on his chest. He’s sure she can feel his heart pounding against her palm. “And keeping my voice real low,” She whispers as her hands run up to his shoulders. “As I tell you that I enjoyed our date,” Her fingers whisper over the skin of his neck, a spark running down his body until it reaches his waist, before placing them at the back of his neck. He can feel her fingers play with his hair and her breath against his as she speaks. “And that I would love to go out again.”

The rope that had been holding him back the whole evening breaks as he eliminates the space between them to press his lips against hers, his hands coming out to rest on her hips. Her surprised gasp brings him back to reality, quickly pulling away from her.

“I’m sorry,” He whispers with matching wide eyes. “I don’t know what came over me.”

“Yeah, well,” Her voice is shaky and he hates himself for causing her such distress. “I think we let this fake date thing get to us a little bit.”

“I’m really sorry, Swan.” He breathes out.

“Don’t worry about it,” She waves away, running her hands through her hair. “We are just very good at this.” 

“Aye.” 

“Anyway, I really need to get out of these shoes so I’ll see you tomorrow?”

“Of course,” He nods quickly. “Have a good night.”

She backs away towards her room with a small smile. “I had a great time, Killian, thank you.”

“Me too,” He holds his breath until her door closes behind her. He lets it out in a rush, his hands coming up to rub at his face as a panic starts to rise in his chest.

He was in love with his best friend. That’s when true hell began.

Despite his realization, Killian decided to follow Emma’s lead. She didn’t bring up their ‘date’ and what happened after and neither did he. They carried on as normal for the next couple of months, as he carried on his role as her devout friend. 

His date with Ariel only served to cement his feelings towards Emma. While a lovely and gorgeous girl, he missed the desire and affection that had been so natural when he had been with Emma. It made it all clearer. Especially when he couldn’t bring himself to bring her to his room.

So he ignored the way his heart beat faster in his chest whenever she drew near, whenever they touched. He forced down his desire to hold her a little tighter, touch her a little longer, kiss her, love her. He pushed it all down because she was his best friend and he would rather have her as a friend than not have her at all.

---

“God, this kid is killing me,” Emma groaned as she all but threw herself onto the couch. “How long until he’s out of me, again?”

“According to your very detailed calendar,” Killian grinned, looking at the calendar stuck to the fridge door. “About 13 weeks.”

“Who was the smart asshole who thought counting it in weeks would help?” 

Killian laughed, watching as Emma pouted before shuffling on the couch trying to get comfortable. “Does 3 months sound like less time?”

Her displeased groan was his only answer and the following glare at his responding laugh had him extremely glad that she didn’t have magical powers.

“I’m sorry, love, will a foot rub help?”

Her assessing gaze had him brightening his already dazzling smile. She sighed and he counted it as a victory. “Damn you, Jones, you always know what to say.” 

Killian winked. “It’s one of my many talents.”

“Yeah, yeah.” Emma rolled her eyes but her smile took all the heat away from it, specially as she shook her feet out of her slippers. “Just come here.”

Killian grinned as he sat on the coffee table, a pillow on his lap to accommodate her aching feet. He took hold of her ankles, carefully pulling her feet up to his lap. She sighed at the upright position and he waited for her to get comfortable once more.

“Ready?”

“Oh yeah,” Emma smiled in anticipation. “Dazzle me with your skills.”

Killian laughed before finally putting his hands on her feet. He had become accustomed to rubbing her feet after a long day, especially during the latest weeks as they began to hurt more and more. She had protested against it the first time he tried to offer, claiming that she didn’t need to be babied just because she was having one. After she relented, she had basically claimed him as her foot masseur.

He didn’t complain. It made him feel like he was helping, like he was part of it. Besides, he definitely wasn’t complaining at the sounds Emma makes during his foot rubs. Especially when she really got into it. The pillow on his lap wasn’t just for her comfort.

Killian focused on the plot of the coin documentary Mary Margaret made them watch as punishment for the disaster that was David’s bachelor party. Little did she know, it had actually helped him a lot in situations like this.

“Ow!”

Emma’s startled gasp of pain had him quickly pull his hands away from her feet. 

“What happened? Did I hurt you?”

“No, no, you were doing great,” Her face scrunched up in pain as her hands roamed her belly and sides before settling at the front of her abdomen. “I just felt this sharp pain.”

“Maybe you should lie down.”

“Yeah, may- Ah!” He took hold of her ankles once more to put them back down as she tried to curl in pain. “Okay,” She winced in pain as she felt another sharp pain. “I’m kinda freaking out, Killian!”

“I’m sure it’s all going to be alright, Emma, but,” he continued as she opened her mouth to argue with him. “Why don’t we go to the hospital to get it checked out? I’ll text Neal on the way.”

Emma nodded quickly, taking hold of his hands to stand up from the couch, letting go to place them on her abdomen once more. “Oh god!”

“Emma,” he called, placing his hand under her chin to bring her eyes up to his. “It’s going to be alright, trust me.” Even with fearful eyes, she nodded, her trust in him comforting as he smiled. “Let’s go.” 

She took his hand as he led her out of the flat, gripping it painfully as she gasped in pain. 

“Bloody hell!”

“Same here, buddy.”

---

Killian wondered if it was possible to wear out tiled flooring with all the back and forth pacing he was doing in the hospital’s waiting room. Of course, all of that stopped mattering when the consultation room’s door opened to an annoyed but no longer in pain Emma.

“So?” 

“She’s fine,” The doctor answered as she walked out behind Emma who couldn’t help her eye roll. In any other moment he would have smiled at that. “Those were just Braxton Hicks contractions, they are contractions in the uterine wall not unlike labor contractions.”

“Yeah, so fine is an understatement, don’t you think?”

Again, if looks could kill.

“So, everything is normal?” Killian directed at Doctor Lucas - according to her coat - hoping Emma would forgive him for ignoring her comment. “And the baby is fine?”

“Absolutely, it can be a very scary situation but they are both fine.” 

“Thanks, doc.” Emma smiled, a thin smile but thankful nonetheless. Doctor Lucas gave them a final smile and a nod before returning to her office.

Emma sighed, placing her hands on Killian’s arms. “Thank you, Killian, I couldn’t have done this if you hadn’t been so calm.”

“Calm?!” He exclaimed, his hands gripping her wrists. “I have never been more scared in my whole life!”

“What?” Her mouth parted as her eyes widened in surprise. “But you said everything would be alright.”

“I’m not a doctor, Swan, I don’t know anything!”

“But we are fine, it’s all okay.”

His hands moved from her wrists to grasp onto her hands. “Are you sure?”

Her smile both calmed his racing heart and created a flutter in his belly. “Yeah, all good.”

Killian wrapped his arms around her tightly while minding the baby between them, feeling all his worries leave him as her fingers played with the hairs at the nape of his neck.

“Hey,” Neal’s voice interrupted their hug and Killian stuck his hands on his back pockets as he took Emma’s hands in his. “Is everything okay?”

“Yeah, it’s all okay.” She smiled reassuringly.

“Killian’s text said to come to the hospital, what happened?”

“Something called Braxton Hicks contractions.” Killian answered, with a deep breath as he fixed his hair.

“Oh, that’s a relief,” Neal’s shoulder dropped in relief as he ran his thumbs over Emma’s hands. “The books say most women don’t even feel them.”

“Alright,” Emma pulls her hands from Neal’s grip to place them on her hips. “No uterus, no opinion.” 

Finally, Killian could smile at her glare, mostly because it wasn’t directed at him.

“What took you so long anyway?” Killian asked, hoping to distract Emma’s anger. 

“I was having coffee with Tink,” Neal answered, before his eyes widened and he smacked his hand against his forehead. “Shit, she probably thinks I ditched her.”

“What? Why?”

“Well, I checked my messages while she went to the bathroom and didn’t even tell her.”

“She’s gonna kill you,” Killian laughed, stopping when he received a raised eyebrow glare from Emma. “I mean, I’m sure she’ll forgive you.”

“Oh,” Her eyes widened in realization. “I gotta go back in there.”

“Why? What’s wrong? Are you okay?” Neal asked in succession as he laid his hands on her arms. “Tell me.” 

Emma sighed. “I forgot my underwear, okay? Chill.” She answered with a chuckle.

“Oh.”

“Yeah.” She rolled her eyes fondly when Neal let go of her arms to nervously scratch the side of his head. She shared an amused look with Killian before returning to the consultation room.

Neal cleared his throat, turning towards Killian. “Thanks for bringing her to the hospital, man. I really appreciate it.” He nodded, laying a hand on his shoulder.

“Don’t worry about it, mate, it was the least I could do.”

“I just wish it had been me,” Neal sighed, stuffing his hands in his pockets. “I mean, I’m the dad.”

It wasn’t easy to forget.

He opened his mouth to reassure his friend when Doctor Lucas came back out of her office. “I got you some information on Braxton Hicks, in case you have any questions,” She smiled politely, handing Killian the papers. “You did the right thing bringing her in, you’re going to make a wonderful father.”

And while Killian’s heart soared at the compliment, there was a weight bringing it back down to the reality of the situation. He glanced towards Neal’s hurt expression before smiling thinly at the doctor. “He’s the father, actually,” Killian corrected, taking the papers from her. “And he knows way more than me about this so I need all the help I can get, thanks.”

“Right, hmm, I’m sorry.” 

“No need to worry, you didn’t know,” Neal waved away Doctor Lucas’ apology with a tight smile. “It was an honest mistake.”

As if he didn’t already feel bad enough.

---

“Are you sure you should be doing this?” 

“Mary Margaret has been complaining about this door for weeks,” David grunted as he tried to force a screw to leave its place. “She’s going to love me when I fix it.”

“I’m all for helping you make your lady happy, mate,” Killian continued, ignoring David’s unamused glare by adjusting his grip on the door. “I’m just wondering if you’re the right man for the job.”

David stood up, placing his clenched fists on his waist. “Are you saying I’m not man enough to fix a creaky door?”

“Not at all,” Killian quickly answered, holding back his amusement. “You just don’t have the greatest track record when it comes to fixing things. Need I remind you-”

“Don’t even start with the TV incident.” David interrupted before returning to the task at hand.

“I’m just saying, you still owe me 200 dollars.”

“How’s that inappropriate crush on Emma going?” David asked, effectively making him forget about the time he ruined their TV.

The skin behind his ear was tingling and his hands were too busy to scratch at it. “Bloody fantastic,” he gritted out. Sometimes, he still regretted having confided in his best friend. “I just wish I could make all these feelings go away, wish it could all go back to normal.” David sent him a sympathetic gaze and he sighed. “I love having her around, helping out with the baby is amazing but I think Neal is having a hard time with all of this.”

“What do you mean?” David asked with a frown, both at the idea but also with effort.

“I think he feels left out,” Killian answered. “When I took Emma to the hospital, the doctor thought I was the father and the look on Neal’s face killed me.”

“It’s not your fault, though, what else were you going to do? You had to take her to the hospital.”

“Aye, but-”

“It’s not your fault,” David repeated insistently. “You’ve done nothing wrong.” He returned to the task at hand, his head tilting to the side and a smirk twitching at his lips. “Except for loving the woman carrying your best friend’s baby.”

“Right,” Killian said bitterly. “Thanks, mate.” 

David stood up to his full height and turned to Killian, with a sympathetic expression. “I’m on your side, Killian, you know I am. This is just-”

“Complicated, I know.” Killian sighed.

---

“Check this out.” Emma grinned excitedly as Neal entered their flat.

With a careful motion, she placed a can of Coke on top of her round belly, keeping it balanced. She turned a bright grin towards the two men watching. Killian laughed with her unaware of Neal’s fainter laughter.

“She’s been doing that all day.” Killian teased.

Emma rolled her eyes at him, taking the can back from its resting place. “I should be allowed to have fun with this pregnancy.”

“Of course, love, amuse yourself.” 

Emma smiled delightedly, putting down the can on the counter.

“Right,” Neal interrupted. “Emma, I brought you some lunch, I thought-”

“Oh, what is it?” Emma asked, excitedly taking the container from his hand.

“Your favorite.” There was a soft smile on his lips. “Onion rings.” 

As Emma opened the container, she quickly pulled it away from her as one of her hands flew to her mouth. “God.” Her muffled groan was his only warning and Killian quickly flew in to grab the container from her hands before she turned and ran - as best she could - to the bathroom, slamming the door behind her.

“What happened?”

“She can’t eat onion rings anymore,” Killian explained, closing the container again with an apologetic smile towards his friend.

“B-But you love onion rings,” Neal spoke at the bathroom door.

“Not anymore!” Emma groaned out.

“I’m sorry, are you gonna be okay?”

“Yeah, yeah, I’ll be fine,” Emma coughed, her voice echoing. “Just make sure they’re gone when I come out.”

“Don’t worry, Swan, I’ll get rid of them.” Killian called out, throwing the container in the fridge.

“I can’t believe this,” Neal breathes out, running a harried hand through his hair. “I made her sick.”

“You didn’t know, mate, it could happen to anyone.”

“Not to you,” Neal pointed out. “You know this stuff and you’re not even the father. I should be more involved.”

“Right.” 

They both turned to the bathroom when Emma came out, her hands holding her back. 

“Onion rings, guys, this kid took onion rings from me,” she pouted.

Neal pressed his lips together in a small smile as he rubbed Emma’s arms. “It’s not long until he’s out here and I’ll give you a lifetime’s supply of onion rings.”

Emma grinned. “I’ll hold you to that.”

Despite the ache in his chest, he knew he had to come up with something to help them. He knew that it would hurt but they would be happy in the long run. And that’s all he wanted - for Emma to be happy. Even if it wasn’t with him.

Killian cleared his throat, catching their attention. “Can I talk to you two for a second?”

“Yeah, what’s up?” Emma asked with a concerned frown, even as she settled on the couch with Neal sitting at her side on the arm.

“I wanted to talk about us, the three of us.”

“Are you breaking up with us, dude?” Neal teased.

“You two should live together,” Killian said quickly, wanting to be done as fast as possible. “Because you live with me, I’m always here for the pregnancy stuff, Emma, and Neal is missing it and I know it upsets him.”

“Are you kicking me out?” Emma asked, her voice small as she looks at him with hurt in her eyes. He feels his heart breaking into a million pieces. 

“No!” Killian quickly reassures, his hands in front of him. “I love living with you but,” He takes a deep breath. “If you’re going to have a roommate, it should be your baby’s father.”

“I mean, he has a point.” Neal agrees and Emma turns to him with a surprised look.

“Neal, are you sure this is a good idea?” She frowns. “It’s always been complicated between us.” 

“I know but, he’s right, I hate missing out on all of this pregnancy stuff,” Neal sighs. “If we lived together, I could be there for you to help.”

“I don’t know…” Emma’s frown deepened as she glanced at Killian. 

He had to cross his arms over his chest so that he wouldn’t reach out to her, beg her to ignore him and stay. Stay with him forever. But he couldn’t.

“We’ll give it a try,” Neal tries, his hand laying on her round belly. “For him.”

He watched as Emma pressed her lips together, not pleased with the argument but being convinced by it. Her hand rested over Neal’s and Killian had to look away, uncomfortable at the intimate scene, aching over Emma’s departure.

Neal would be a good father, he trusted that at least. They had bonded over the disappointing father figures in their lives when they first met so he knew he wouldn’t want to make the same mistakes as his father had made. But, despite his love for his friend, he didn’t fully trust him to not screw things up - he had betrayed Emma before.

But he wanted to give them a chance. To give the baby a chance at a family without a devilishly handsome bloke taking up space where he doesn’t belong. 

“Okay,” She whispered before clearing her throat. “We’ll give it a try.”

“Great!” Neal grinned brilliantly, kissing Emma’s forehead before turning to pat Killian’s shoulder, almost too strongly. “That was a great idea, man.”

He really wished he didn’t have such great ideas.

---

Killian let the rum wash down his throat, enjoying the sting of it. 

“Hey,” David greeted as he walked into the flat, receiving a head tilt as a response. “Emma all moved out? How are you taking it?”

“I’m doing brilliantly, mate,” Killian answered, a forced smile on his face as he leaned back on the couch. “I can drink rum again, I had to stop drinking because even just the smell made her sick, but since she’s not here…” He raised his glass in a salute before downing it. “I can make all the noise I want, bring back whoever I want, I could have sex in the living room!”

“Killian-”

“I can walk around naked,” He continued, standing up from the couch, gesturing wildly with his hands. “I can have an orgy in the house, I can scream, I can dance, I can do whatever I want!” He was almost manic as he all but threw his glass onto the coffee table. “I can rest easy knowing that I reunited a happy family. Maybe they’ll invite me to the wedding too, I can even officiate!”

“Dude, are you okay?”

“I’m a fucking hero, David,” he spat out. “I know that it was wrong to love her but I do. And I let her go because it’s the right thing to do, I lost my chance. If I ever even had one…It doesn’t matter. I’m better on my own, I can go back to my whorish ways and I can stay alone in this flat forever.”

“You’re not going to be alone.” David reassured him, approaching him.

“I will never love anyone like I love her, that much is true,” Killian sighed, burying his fingers in his hair and pulling on it to try and stop his tears. “I’ll go back to how it was before and I’ll be here to watch her be happy with someone else. And that will be fine because that’s all I want… for her to be happy.” He finished in a barely audible whisper.

David’s arms wrapped around him in an instant, his hand on the back of his head in that way that made everyone feel safe and loved. Killian returned his best friend’s hug, burying his face on his shoulder as he let his tears fall.

“You did the right thing, Killian,” David whispered, tightening his hold at Killian’s tearful scoff. “I know it hurts but I’m so proud of you. You’ll be okay and you won’t be alone, not while you have me.” 

His arms wrapped tighter around David and he let the embrace tape all his broken pieces back together. He willed it to be enough.

second and final chapter posting tomorrow! hope you enjoyed!

[ultrahpfan5blog]

Shazam! Fury of the Gods - Review

I am a big fan of the first Shazam movie. To me, that is one of the unique superhero movies that is less about action and superheroics, and more about heart and emotion. Plus, it was genuinely funny. So I was very excited when the entire team reunited to do Shazam! Fury of the Gods. Just saw the movie today and while I don't think its as good as the first, the film was a lot of fun. Arguably my favorite superhero movie since The Batman.

The film feels like it improves on some elements from the first film and is inferior on other elements. One thing the film definitely improves on is the action and visual effects. The first Shazam was fairly measured on its big action set pieces. And the Seven Deadly Sins definitely felt quite video gamy. Here though, the action sequences are quite good and the visuals on the Dragon, as seen in the trailer, are quite awesome. The film's humor is also on point. There is a scene with Helen Mirren reading a letter which had me in stitches laughing. The humor is consistent and keeps the tone light and frothy. The film also gives all the characters something to do and they all have some sort of purpose and story. Djimon Honsou's Wizard has a much expanded role and he and Jack Dylan Grazer's Freddy share some really funny scenes. The cast also has a lot of chemistry and immense likability, so you enjoy watching the various antics they get up to. The film is also fairly quick paced. It never slacks or bores the audience. The very final climactic set piece is pretty cool.

The one element that the film is inferior to compared to its predecessor, is the emotional heart. It is a little tricky for this film because one of the appeals of the first film was the little kid in a superhero's body. But Billy isn't so young anymore. They still have enough of it to be fun, but it is no longer as refreshing. Also, there is nothing quite as emotionally powerful as the arc of Billy trying to find his mother and finally coming to terms with the fact that his mother rejected him. The film actually doesn't spend enough time with the characters as kids. The key arc with Billy clinging onto his family out of the fear of losing them doesn't have enough emotional weight because we don't see Billy as a kid in situations where that worry would come up. Also, the key dynamic between Freddy and Billy, which was the heart of the first film, is pushed to the side though it does come full circle at the end. The entire action climax could have been trimmed down because it does start to feel a bit repetitive although the ending of the climax is kickass. They could have given that 10-15 mins to giving some more depth to all the kids and their individual predicaments.

The performances are strong across the board. All the kids and their counterparts are perfectly matched. Levi is still a delight as Shazam. Asher Angel doesn't have enough to do in this film but he makes an impression. Jack Dylan Grazer is a scene stealer, as he was in the first film and Adam Brody is a very apt adult Freddy. Ross Butler and Ian Chen as Eugene, DJ Cotrona and Jovan Armand as Pedro, Meaghan Goode and Faithe Herman as Darla, and Grace Caroline Currey as Mary are all excellent. I particularly love how Meaghan Goode plays adult Darla. Grace also makes an impression as the most level headed sibling of the lot. Rachel Zegler, Helen Mirren, and Lucy Liu are all enjoyable as the daughters of Atlas. Marta Milans and Cooper Andrews as the foster parents are very likable and the movie could have used more of them. Djimon Honsou is a hoot and clearly having a lot of fun.

All in all this was still a really fun film. I feel bad that this film is bombing so badly at the BO. I still can't believe that Morbius had a better opening weekend than what this film will have. Unfortunately, this film feels like it was a bad victim of circumstance. Coming 4 years after the first film, which was probably too big a gap for a minor character, after a spate of comic book films which haven't been received with a lot of positivity, with no major integration into the main DCEU till then, with now also the image of being a dead franchise walking after Gunn and Safran have taken over DC, there just has been audience apathy towards the film that the marketing hasn't been able to overcome. I also find the reviews for this to be strange. While I do think the first Shazam is a bit better, I don't get how that has a 90% RT and this has a 54%. I would have thought it would at least have a 75-80% RT rating. I think David F. Sandberg has done a real admirable job with these two Shazam films and its sad that we won't see any more of these but I have enjoyed the two we got. I'd rate this a solid 8/10 on first watch.

[seasonofthewitch06]

Girl…this Ross and Rachel thing is so boring 😭